#I have dance class tomorrow
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Me when I look at my symptom tracker trends and my average total symptom amount/severity has gone up 200% in the last week (send morphine)
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#chronic pain#chronic illness#ehlers danlos syndrome#zebra#send help#send painkillers#please I’m begging you to let me sleep#not like death like literal sleep#everything hurts#I have dance class tomorrow#me when my disability disables me#fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck
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#you'll never guess what movie i just watched#:'3#it was very painful#but it feels nice to be seen in a way that idk i ever have#anyways so im projecting HARD#danny is just my little puppet i like to make dance using his little strings#i should be asleep rn#i got class tomorrow#and work#but i just cant#i think im going to be stuck thinking about this movie for a while#for better or for worse#all i know is#there is still time#danny phantom#dp#danny phantom fanart#dp fanart#danny fenton#ibispaint#i saw the tv glow#danny fenton fanart#trans danny#trans danny phantom#trans danny fenton#scene redraw#i saw the tv glow redraw
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Me: I am not a true historian of the Salem Witch Trials, just a local with a passion and a lot of books. I have read a lot of books though.
Them: I trust you
Me: Here is a very basic, uncontroversial statement
Them: Well, actually
Me: I am stabbing your poppet as we speak
#the real fun starts tomorrow#the people who post blatantly untrue shit with 'citation: I'm a local' congratulations you clearly also failed history class!!#I have at least 3k pages of information in front of me and that's just what I've BOUGHT do you want to DANCE
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i wish i was able bodied so i could take a dance class that would be so fun i think
#i dont think i’d be good at it necessarily but i think it would be very fun#i took tai chi the last semester i was in college & i loved learning the moves & the sequences#i guess i could try youtubing it when im feeling physically up to it but :( not quite the same as an actual class#i was gonna do clogging!!! and then my body was too fucked and i couldnt take the class!!!! im so sad abt that#i miss my other house where i had big open spaces & hardwood floors so i could spin & dance around in my wheelchair. i just dont have#the space for it now#grrrr im having sm fun pretending my body’s not fucked and dancing around the house with the dogs but i knowwww it’ll hurt so bad tomorrow#but right now im really proud of myself for having fun and being silly and getting myself#out of the funk i was in earlier!!! im ending a hard day on a rly good note!!!! but god i wish it could be like this forever#ive lost so much stuff that brings me joy bc of my disability & im getting a small glimpse of rmring what it was like#& i want it back so bad. but it’s really really good even if it’s just for right now
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we miss you Daddy 🥺
daddy is packing up his briefcase and about to drive home, dw
gonna spend christmas with my lil guys, huh?
#i got one last class tomorrow#that i might have to miss cuz im fucking ILL#but#im doing a wee dancey dance#and then next week im planning a lasagna night with my friend before she flies home for christmas#i really attract american friends like a magnet#they're drawn in by my inexplicable accent and tism#ask#mwah mwah
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fun stuff about today:
fried egg breakfast! fun, easy, yummy, and good for me
i got to come into campus and work on my art project :) it's a sculpture of a butterfly!!
there was somebody for a lgbtq+ policy club at a table who had a pin-maker for making pins... guess who has a new pin hehe (i also signed up for the club)
on the way back to my dorm i saw someone carrying a tiny kitten in a huge cat carrier
this evening i'm going to another dance performance w/ school!! yay!!!
#melonposting#waugh. before i go to the dance i need to change and eat dinner#i'm sort of both hungry and not hungry? weirdly?#i'll have something to eat anyway. even if it's small#tomorrow i'm going back home for yom kippur. probably staying the weekend#and i have no class monday or tuesday this week so i might stick around longer? ooh
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i haet beinv sick sm like so fucking mucj
#my nose has been fucking with me for six hours straight. i wish i was joking. SIX HOURS#it’s too hot but i turn on the AC and i die and even the fan is making me sneeze but without it i will perish#also considering a new nose piercing and an entire set of complications w it that specifically had ti happen TODAY#i had to miss my dance class. violin class. have to miss school tomorrow when j hv some CRUCIAL things and my attendance is already#not so good (ive missed like 4 days already 💀)#TOMORROW IS ALL THE SUBJECTS THAT ARE IMPORTANT. MATH. PHYS. CHEM. WHY ME#like im in this weird limbo where i cant work but i cant sleep so i just sit. and exist. i hate it hate it hate i have sm work to get done#UGH#also been stuck in this weird limbo between coughibg and puking. for six hours too 😍#yeet.txt#vent? yeah basically.
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need this strength at the end of this assignment
#its due tomorrow night and i am like halfway done#im so tired man its like 3am and ive been working nonstop since like thursday#i threw up the other day after a huge panic attack bc of this assignment#its a whole mess rn im just waiting for it to be over honestly#i need to get a passing grade on this assignment to pass the class bit the deadline is impossible#like the amount of work we had to do cannot physically fit into the time frame we were given#so we've been crunching for like a week which is. not having any effects on me 😁#no more stress pls i cant take it anymore i need to have fun i need to eat good food i need to laugh and be held and watch tv and play#and chase my friends around and smell fresh air and listen to good music and look at cool art and cook and dance and smile#work is over its time to play for the rest of our lives#ive been working since 9am which means ive been working for 17 hours#HEY#17 HOURS???????#fuck my prof for real wdym 17 hours of work#he tells us ''better time management'' i worked 12 hours every day on this assignment 9am to 9pm and i cant get it done. fuck you seriously
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guess who's taking a jazz class now
#tried to switch to a musical theater minor and they were like 'um ur not a theater major u cant'#ok sorry ill kms now /j#but my advisor was like u can take a dance class if u want instead! theres a jazz class this semester!#and um. here we are.#have to unlock my dance knowledge from when i was a kid#i will be going tomorrow. will report back#ben talks
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The situation that resulted in us ending broadcast early on Thursday turned out to be a trigger. Neutral, fortunately; but it's parked front firmly in a cluster related to our childhood and those semi-unearthed feelings.
As such, we're working on a reduced roster, and with emotions I'd consider a little more volatile and unbalanced than we'd like.
I thought I had quite a good hold on it, but these feelings of directionlessness and overwhelm have begun to hit at the same time; unrest, mixed with craving for a well-rested state that we haven't experienced in years.
Monday couldn't come soon enough, and yet I fear its approach.
I think the static is singing again.
That's a sign to sleep.
#The signal's been fuzzy all day.#I think we'll attempt a cluster switch tomorrow potentially#Heaven knows none of our cluster is good to do burlesque class and we have a 2-hour rehearsals in lead up to a Rocky Horror Immersion Night#I say as if we're dancing anything more than the Time Warp#No#We're character-acting as Doctor Scott#It's a Wheelchair Role thank gods#To Delete#Perhaps?#dissociative identity disorder#John 🎵#System Log
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jesus christ. okay i'm done GOODNIGHT
#i'm gonna be soo fucking wiped tomorrow :(#and i have the worst most intense dance class ever :(#ted talks
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Dress rehearsals are literally my 3 favorite things about dance combined (dressing pretty actually dancing and watching dances) so idk why I complain about them every time I have them
#I have dress rehearsal tomorrow and my show on friday#I have 6 dances rattling around in my head and only 4 of them are for this show#the other 2 are for recital for my dance studio next month#I’m at practice rn but we’re just going over the second half of the show in the auditorium#so I just get to chill in the audience on my phone between dances#my second half dance isn’t even until near the end of the show#I do still have my my dance class this afternoon so that kinda sucks#but hey new fhjy tonight!!#madurday night live
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Goth club night 🩸🦷🩸🦷🩸
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round….round four of dune in imax……dear god……
#I literally have an 8:30am dance class tomorrow#what’s wrong with me#dune#dune part 2#☆ wren warbles
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Question before I start doing the appliance polls again (making polls is tedious and a long process and I have my finals this week and I can't even)
#i want to know#my french final opens tomorrow#my final research paper is due tomorrow#im way behind on all of my tournaments#im way behind in french#im behind in most of my classes#today i failed a physics test#one of my exams is on monday and i am not prepared#theres a dance on saturday that no one invited me to and people turned me down to#next thursday is another exam#i have two more the week after that#im even behind on reading fanfiction#i cant ever live up to my mother's expectations#this is probably a cry for help#idk though#what would i know#im pretty dumb on the best of days#anyways#not a poll poll#not an update#poll#polls
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#iam drunk as FUCC after watchign atrocious movies with my housemates and playing drinking games with them and#lemme just say.#Lessons Have Been Learned#lmfao -- it was vvv fuckin fun but i habe CLASS. TOMORROW. and i can tell already its gonna be a lil fuckyhdlshfjdlk#id never met drunk bee before bUt they sure camd by to say hello tonite lmao#drink responsiblyy dudes lmao#dont play the superbad drinking ge if its yr first time getting fucked up lmao#and uhh#dont watch magic mike (also for the forst time) after That either hdlfhdk#it was hilarious and also v gay anf none of us were able to actually handle it. ESPECIALLY after we started watching a movie that wad WAY.#WAY. WAY. WAY. WAY WAY WAY FUCKING WORSE#HDKSGSLDJGHDKDFHDHJLS#IT WAS LIKE WATCHING A MPVIE MADE OUT OF A WATTPAD FIC. LITERALLY MAFIA BOSS AU. I SPENTMOST OF THE MOVIE SCREAM-LAUGHING BC IT WAS SO BAD#we couldtn handle.it. I couldnt handle it. im still fuckign shocked by how nad it was#WE COULDNT EBEN FINISH IT. WE SYARTED DANCING BACHATA INSTEAD#HDLDHSL.#so.#yeah. anyway aapologies if im obnoxious in yr tags tknighr im dealing witg All That still being in my system jdgskdg#bee speaks#the goal WAS ot get Drunk so like. achievement unlocked lmao#i am 1000% uninterested in watching superbad sober ever. buuuuut#maybe playing a drjnking game for my first watch (+first drniking game lmao) waaaaas. not tge Smartest move i couldve chose lmao
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