#I have a lot of thoughts about this lol sorry this got long

[beautifullilacsky]

Babygirl. We have come so far.

Today, your thoughts turned around to the past. They shook hands with the way we used to treat ourselves. It started off on a note I'd never expect it to start off of, though; look at that picture of me, the one in the natural pool in Madeira. The first time I looked at it, I was truly surprised and shooketh. "Damn, I look thin", as to which niklas said that that's how I always look, I am, in fact, thin. I didn't count, but I think I asked him at least 3 times. "Do I truly look like this?" He did say that the angle might be making me look extra thin, but yes. Suddenly, it all clicked. How to him, I can seem so fragile. So fragile that he'd always let me walk first on hikes to make sure the pace is okay, always carrying the backpack himself. The way he is scared of hurting me, like, physically. The picture looks like a tiny, thin, and fragile girl. Yeah tbh, she also doesn't look particularly strong. You can see her collarbones. Her ribs. Her shoulders. Tbh, she also looks a bit like a petshop. I do think the gopro did something with the angle there, u can't tell me my head is out of proportion to my tiny body, lol. My point is. Today, I was doubting whether or not I should eat those cookies. After thinking if it'd make me thick, I remembered. I am v thin, more weight wouldn't be so bad.

I never expected to truly feel skinny. Or well, 'too skinny', at least. To think I could gain some weight; it wouldn't be a problem. That is very new to me. After 25 years. Some of those years being spend hating my body and my belly and feeling overweight, even if my teacher even told me that being underweight is dangerous, her eyes seemingly insinuating the obvious.

Yet here I am. This one picture. And tbh, the other pics or videos of this vacation, don't have the same vibe. So I do think it's the angle. And maybe a bit of a fishbowl effect. Either way. It got me thinking. And suddenly I was thinking of it again: boobs. I am also reading 'the 7 husband's of Evelyn Hugo', who seduced men with her big boobs. Somehow, booby enlargement came to my mind again. Why? It's been so long. I have learned to love my boobs, yet this blast of the past came into my head. Actually,.. it is just a thought. It is actually nice. A reminder of where we came from.

How I hated my body in the past. And here I am. Loving every single part of it. Frankly, I love my boobs the way they are. Sure, they might not be super big, but I don't need to hold them when I run or sprint down the stairs. Sure, they are soft in the middle instead of pointy, but I think it's fascinating how certain temperatures, moods and touches can change that. Sure, they don't touch, but at least it also won't create a hot brew in there or trap my clothes inbetween or underneath my boobs. Honestly, they are truly perfect. (Even the little pimple on there right now. Even though I am a bit scared; is it truly a pimple? It should be, it behaves like one for sure.) I can cup one into my hand; it is a perfect fit. As if they were made to be held so gently and smoothly. So filled with love. So, ... true. My hand can touch all of its beautiful creases. They don't overflow my hands, nor do I need to search to find them. Sure, some might have bigger boobs, but not everyone likes that. Some people get attention just because of it. I am truly happy to be able to say that a lot of people just like me for my personality. The looks are for sure also there, but at least my boobs don't get eye-fucked or objectified. I am myself. Perfect the way I am. And I am grateful to be this exact way. I think my boobs are adorable, they are cute, and truly. Truly beautiful. Thanks boobs, for being w me always. And I'm sorry that I didn't see the beauty of you guys for a part of my life. I am happy that I do now, since a while. Love u, boobies. Lol.

Anyhow. I wish to send myself love letters. See this is a loveletter to one of the bodyparts which I was insecure about in the past. Let me show them some true love, which is exactly what they deserve.

[toxintouch]

hii!! I just read cold spots and it was AMAZING!!! Im not sure if you wanted to continue the fic, but if you don’t mind could you continue with Veres part? I don’t know what you would write about but I just feel like that fic has so much potential to be a little 3 part series or something 🙏

<- Cold Spots TYSM ANON!! I put the Vere End at the beginning for ease of reading. For the sake of folks who would like to read this as a stand-alone... I think u can? With the knowledge that the premise of Cold Spots is that Mhin and MC/Sparrow went ghost hunting. Vere is said to have been responsible for a handful of local ghost stories, so…of course he makes some mischief.🦊 Also MC needs some Winter wear, stat.  A very light Possessive Vere warning in this btw, though perhaps in a roundabout way.  Plausible deniability is so important to him.

You putter around in your room at the Wet Wick as you go about your nightly routine. The occasional cheer or thud from below only accentuates your nervous energy, punctuating your reluctance to settle down and get into bed. You smooth the covers with your bandaged hands and fluff the pillow before extinguishing the lamplight. You tug the bedding up above your shoulders, fighting to get comfortable. As your eyelids finally start to droop, the flicker of a shadow catches your attention.   It dances and sways and bends and grows until suddenly it is right in front of you.  On top of you. Silken, blood red drips down onto your face, a knife gleam smile too close for comfort.  You breathe in a gasp, wondering if you should scream. “Vere, what–” “Shhh,” he coos, pressing a finger lightly to your lips.  His breath is hot against your skin. “I only came to keep you warm, pet.”

Heat Signature

“Poor thing.” Vere purrs.  “Your lips are so cold.”  He leans ever closer, his mouth hot over yours–hovering.  His other hand reaches for your face as well, nails trailing against your cheek in a teasing caress.

You feel even the thought of being cold leave your body, replaced instead by the unusual thrill he commands, that strange enthralling sway.

That heat you’ve come to associate with Vere; sweet tendrils of want that nestle in your bloodstream.

You squirm a little, though you can’t move much with him looming over you.

(You should probably do more to protest his intrusion into your room, you think to yourself, though, the majority of you is–curious, daresay even far too eager to–)

“Whatever trouble did you get up to that left you in such a state?”

At this you scoff, tilting your head back into the pillow and effectively knocking Vere’s finger from your lips.  

“As if you don’t know,” you accuse.

Vere looks entirely unperturbed by you shaking him off, his lithe fingers traveling freely along the newly displayed skin of your throat, making your pulse jump.

Vere chuckles at that, dark and silky.

“Being tight lipped about your adventures, hm?”  He angles your face just so, ensuring you meet his sharp eyes, his nose brushing up against yours.  “Not that it matters.  It so happens I do know what you’ve been up to.  Trespassing in places that don’t belong to you.”

“...It was an abandoned building.  I don’t think it really belonged to anyone.”

“And that’s where you’d be wrong,” Vere says, “everything in this city belongs to someone, darling.  You just don’t know what belongs to who yet.”  He peers down at you with laughter in his expression, though there's a distinct edge to it that you can't quite place.

“So, you're here because that building belongs to you...?”

“Hmm, amongst other things.  However shall I make you apologize to me for this most egregious offense?”  He asks airily, shifting until he’s beside you rather than perched over you, resting his cheek in his hand and letting his eyes slip closed. He's the absolute picture of unbothered leisure.  

(You’re not fooled–he’s simply waiting for you to let your guard down before he pounces.)

You open your mouth to deny any debts on your part (though, if your ghost hunting spot was indeed Vere’s hideout, you really do feel guilty) but Vere cuts you off before you can speak.

“Alas, I suppose it’s not mine anymore.  Within a week it will reek of wet dogs and cheap booze. It's a lost cause now that those drooling reprobates know it's inhabitable.  A pity.  By Eridia's standards it really was divine in its heyday.  Good wine, music, dancing.  There was this portrait artist who would paint the performances…”

His tone remains light as he reminisces.  But the look he pins you with is dangerous: his eyes gleaming bright, his canines bared in an irreverent grin.

“I had such hopes and dreams of reviving the place myself.  Some of the dances were very scandalous.  You never did share with me your stance on dancing, did you?”

You stumble out an approximate answer.  It’s…harmless information to give, isn’t it?

Though, judging by how pleased Vere looks, you wonder if you should have refused to say.  He looks positively wicked as he ponders your answer aloud.  “Oh, I’m sure you’ve got plenty of talents to share.  In another life, perhaps I'd have put you on stage.  Though, I admit.  I find myself partial to a private show.”

And–as expected–the moment you let your guard down, he's in your space again, crowding you.  Heat and proximity and the softest brush of his lips against yours, light enough to send a thrill down your spine, curiosity and a want so deep it surprises you.

“Well?”  He purrs.  “Care to audition?”

You can't hide behind the excuse of supernatural sway or charm or the thrall of hypnotic sunglo eyes.  It's not Vere's power that controls you. It's your own gnawing desire; starvation and longing that draws you to him despite all sense.

Kissing Vere is heady.  Dizzying.  

Kissing Vere is like being in conversation with Vere–a constant of giving and taking, being chased after and running to keep up.  It’s enticing and alluring and decadent and never quite enough, over too soon even as you feel yourself losing air, the rush of blood and sensation threatening to overwhelm you.

He gives a parting nip to your bottom lip as he pulls away.

Then another one, playful, to your jaw.

When he presses his face into the side of your neck, you expect him to bite again.

What you don’t expect is for him to nuzzle into you, inhaling deeply before heaving a great sigh, his tail flopping lazily to land across you with a thump.

He’s officious as he rearranges the covers, ensuring your arms are tucked carefully away from him before he’s willing to fully settle into the bedding, pulling the blankets up around the both of you like a den.  He hums something low in his chest as he tucks himself up alongside you, long tail curled around your waist. 

It’s rhythmic–

purring.

And it’s…soothing, actually.

The weight of him, the warmth.  The incessant lamplight of the Amaryllis District, shining ever present through your window, is dim–tolerable, even, courtesy of Vere's magnificent shadow manipulations and the blankets sheltering you. 

The constant noise seems to fade away as well, obscured by the sound of purring. “Falling asleep when you have me in your bed, pet?  You really do try your luck…”

[squarebracketsmileyface]

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

I WOULD KILL FOR BIRDIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I WANT MAMA LARK AND PAPA TIM AND BUBA BRIAN AND LITTLE BIRDIE TO JUST BE THE BEST HAPPY FAMILY IN THE WORLD GAH!!!!!!!!!!!!

Mon I hope you know this will forever be in my brain, all my thoughts, are going to be consumed by them.

Do you think inthe everyone lives au they'd want more kids or are they completely happy with their little surprise miracle? And in that vain, do you think Tim would yeet his uterus/ get his tubes tide after Birdie is born or like, again, maybe perhaps... holding out for the possibility of another....

(Don't mind me, I'm just a fiend with baby fever and the love of projecting onto my favorite guys)

~💜

Oh dude even in the 'canon' of Sorry, It's Locked Tim does end up with another kid.

The second kid is more planned than Birdie but still not entirely planned (as in, he and Brian have been talking about it and have been a bit less careful about using protection, but it still happens a lot sooner than they expected it to lol). They name this kid Jesse and it's a little boy, so Birdie gets a little brother.

In the 'everyone lives' AU I think I'd keep this. Around the time when Birdie is sorta 12-13 ish, after Brian comes back into their lives and eventually starts dating Lark and Tim, he and Tim have a kid as well, and again, that kid is Jesse.

Also Jesse is like, obsessed with his big sister when he's a baby. Like, he only wants to be held by her, he stares at her constantly, y'know? He just really loves his big sister.

OH YEAH WAIT I FORGOT TO TELL YOU SOME STUFF ABOUT BIRDIE IN THE LAST ONE.

Birdie is a bug autistic, she fucking loves insects of all kinds. Every type of insect, there isn't a single one she dislikes. However, Tim really doesn't like bugs much (blame that on waking up in the forest, lying on the floor covered in insects and insect bites) but he tries for Birdie. Like, she wants to raise caterpillars? Sure, they can do that... Except that Birdie releases the butterflies in his room one day and he almost has a panic attack so now he's gotta explain to 3-4 year old Birdie that she really "really can't do that because papa is very scared of bugs, even the pretty ones". Birdie gets it and is allowed to raise caterpillars again, but she does ask if that means she can't dress up as insects for Halloween anymore, if Tim is even scared of the pretty ones.

Obviously, Tim says she is the prettiest bug and only bug he likes. She is very happy and proceeds to dress as a shield bug for the next Halloween. Tim is just very confused by her choice 💀

Confused but supportive dad lol

I think I also forgot to mention some of how Birdie is in 'canon' S,IL while it's just her and Tim. Because even though Tim hides MH from her, he can't really hide the PTSD kinda stuff it left him with. He can't hide the nightmares that wake him up, he can't hide how scared he is when he forgets things, stuff like that. He and Birdie have this kinda routine where if he wakes her up with his nightmare she goes and sleeps in his bed with him. So she'll wake up because he's yelled or something in his dream and she'll go into his room (wake him up if he isn't already awake) and they'll cuddle until they both fall back asleep.

A lot of Tim's nightmares pot MH are about losing people, they're about losing Jay and about losing Brian, they're about killing Alex and lying to Jessica about what really happened and then never seeing her again, stuff like that. But they're also about losing Birdie. They're about sort of "what if" scenarios where he lost her before he even knew he was pregnant, where the fight with Alex at the end caused him to miscarry. They're about losing her to some horrible accident now that he actually has her to look after. They're about the Operator coming back and hurting her. They're about the Operator coming back and Tim doing to Birdie what his mum did to him, sending her away to a mental hospital and rarely coming to visit.

The ones about Birdie are the worst for him, the others he kinda knows how to deal with, he dealt with them during MH and also, they did happen. He did lose those people. In a way that makes it less scary, because it's just reliving the events in a way and he can kinda handle that. But the dreams about losing Birdie? They fuck him up. Some days even sending her off to school after a really bad nightmare about losing her feels like too much and can send him into panic attacks all day.

On days like that he and Birdie have an agreement with the school that Birdie can phone home at break and lunch, and if Tim really needs to he can phone and ask for her outside of break and lunch. He tries not to need that one, he doesn't wanna drag her out of class in front of everyone, he doesn't want the other kids to make fun of her for it, because kids can be mean like that. Birdie doesn't really care what the other kids think. She doesn't even realise that getting called out of class like that could be something to be embarrassed by. All she cares about is "my papa is sad and scared and I can make him feel better by talking to him about bugs" because on those phonecalls she literally just talks about bugs she's seen that day and Tim's just happy to listen and remember that she's alive and safe and strangely obsessed with bugs.

ALSO kinda on the same lines as this, even tho Birdie loves Brian as a teacher, she's kinda suspicious of him when he and Tim get together. Like, not massively, but the first time Brian sees Tim have a nightmare when he stays the night, he ends up getting kicked out of Tim's room by Birdie because she doesn't trust him to know how to help. She kinda gets one of those little kid power trips about being the only one who knows how to look after her papa when he has a nightmare, like, she feels all special because just being there or talking to him makes him feel better, y'know lol?

She gets all high and mighty with Brian and he tries to focus on how funny he finds it rather than panicking about whether Tim is okay.

When Birdie doesn't come out of Tim's room again Brian cracks the door to look in and absolutely melts because Birdie and Tim are sound asleep all cuddled up together. Brian sleeps on the sofa that night and ends up all manners of fucked up because it is NOT a comfy sofa to sleep on and his back is already fucked 💀

Many many spasms were had all the next day. That poor man was not having a good time. Birdie feels sorry for him and tells him that next time he can go and sleep in her bed instead.

He appreciates the offer 💀

It doesn't take much convincing from Tim for Birdie to let Brian stay after the first few times he has a nightmare while Brian is staying over, rather than her causing a whole palava kicking Brian out (cos that's not as simple as just, Brian gets up and walks out of the room, he has to transfer into his wheelchair and make sure he grabs his morning meds in case Birdie won't let him back into the room in the morning when he needs them, and make sure he brings his service dog with him cos she sleeps on the bed with him and Tim, y'know? A little less simple than "get up and walk out". Also his neck is also kinda fucked up from the fall so he has a specific pillow that he always uses, which if he doesn't he always finds his neck all kinda of fucked up in the morning, so he's gotta grab that too lol)

Anyway, eventually Brian just becomes part of their whole nightmare routine and Birdie realises that teaming up with him to look after Tim works way better than doing it on her own. So she and Brian cuddle Tim from both sides and he gets extra reminded that they're both still there. Also Brian's service dog is probably trained to help with PTSD, cos no way Brian isn't also a little fucked in the head after MH, so she can task and do deep pressure for Tim. She's a bit confused at first cos usually she does it for Brian, but she gets it very quickly. Birdie is delighted that a dog can be taught to cuddle on command.

Oh shit you asked about tubes tied and stuff as well lmao. Sorry I got so distracted.

I think after they have Jesse, Tim gets a hysterectomy and all that. He doesn't wanna go through pregnancy and birth a third time, so they get that done so he doesn't have to worry about it. He jokes that if Brian or Lark wants another kid they'll have to figure out which one of them is gonna carry it.

He'd be happy to have another kid, all three of them have pretty good jobs now (Lark's the big moneymaker for the family with Tim close behind, Brian's still a teacher because he adores kids) so they could support a third kid financially, but if they want another kid, they're gonna have to adopt or go through a surrogacy thing rather than Tim carrying it like with Birdie and Jesse.

Oh yeah also the kids names:

Birdie is "Birdie Amelia Wright"

Jesse is "Jesse Alexander Thomas"

Yes, I know it's dumb but I love it. Jesse for Jessica. Alexander for Alex. Amelia for Amy. Tim names his kids so that people who were lost to MH are still kept alive in a little way (yeah yeah Jessica is still alive, but Tim has no way of getting in touch with her so nyeh). In the 'everyone lives' AU that kinda doesn't work as well so Jesse's middle name would probably be different in that, cos Alex is still alive lol. But yeah.

@pianofirepirate helped me come up with the Kids full names :]

I've ranted to them about this shit so much recently lol.

SPEAKING OF RANTING TO THEM here's another thing we came up with:

In the 'canon' of S,IL Birdie does eventually find out about MH. Probably about when she's 15-17 I think? One of her friends tells her about it, like, mentions that her dad's look like two of the guys from this old YouTube horror series and shows her a couple things that people managed to save before Tim deleted the MH channel and all that, cos even in universe I like to think MH got relatively popular, with people thinking it was a fictional horror series. It starts a WHOLE conversation at home with Tim and Brian where they have to explain that yeah all that stuff happened to them, no they really don't remember a lot of it (especially Brian), yes people think it's fictional but it's not, etc etc etc.

Tim and Brian are upset that some 'random' kid at school showed MH to Birdie, but over all it's not a world ending thing. What it does do though, is open the floodgates on jokes about stuff that happened in MH. E.g. "can't believe you pushed me off a building" jokes. Brian uses that one so often and Tim just sighs dramatically and comes back with "First of all, you fell! And also YOU'D BEEN STEALING MY MEDS FOR YEARS AND I DIDNT KNOW WHO YOU WERE BEHIND THAT STUPID MASK!" And Birdie just sits back and watches in glee. She finds it hilarious.

Though the first time Brian accused Tim of pushing him she did go "you pushed him off a building!?!?" Like, completely taken aback and they had to explain the whole thing to her and they probably showed her the video so she could see what actually happened.

Honestly I think that maybe once Birdie is like, 18 they end up putting all the videos back up. Maybe they only privated them rather than deleting them idk. But yeah I think after a while they'd just silently put the videos back up and all the lost media people rejoiced, and there's just the unspoken thing that Birdie can watch the videos if she wants to.

She doesn't.

Like, she watches a little bit of it here and there. But she never actually sits down and watches everything, she just doesn't feel like it's something she needs to do. She watches enough to know who the people being talked about by her dads are (Amy, Jessica etc etc etc) and she watches a couple entries with Jay in them over and over and over again. But generally, she just doesn't want to watch the whole thing, y'know. She doesn't watch all of MH and she hasn't seen a single TTA video.

Wait that reminds me now again (sorry, I keep fucking doing this)

That whole thing with Tim sometimes needing to phone Birdie's school and just, like, make sure she's still alive. That doesn't fully go away when Birdie gets older and goes off to college/university. Tim's always been a bit of a helicopter parent and though he gets better at it, he and Birdie do make time to phone each other pretty much every night. Mostly it's just Birdie talking about her day and what she's been up to, and Tim listening. Occasionally he'll chip in with bits about his day, but mostly he's happy to listen to her talking about her studies. (She's gonna be a bug scientist. I can't remember what they're called. But she's gonna be a big scientist, specifically working in conservation of insects).

If Birdie misses a phone call one evening Tim will definitely start to panic a bit, but he makes sure he only sends her one or two texts to check in before he forces himself to put his phone down and go spend time with Brian and/or Jesse :]

Cos while Birdie's uni age, Jesse is only like, idk 10 at most? So Tim still has a lot to do, y'know? Jesse keeps him and Brian occupied and while he's looking after/spending time with Jesse, Tim manages to take his mind off worrying about Birdie pretty well.

[bearenjoyers]

sorry im just thinking about bcs but like. why not add a few smaller scenes of gus interacting with his own men? why does it seem like, in comparison, mike is almost immediately elevated to a higher status than those two in bcs purely because we actually get to see him having normal conversations with gus? like i understand they might not keep the plot moving as well because of the fact obviously if victor is currently doing something it’s because gus told him to etc. but for the most part all of the smaller interactions gus does have with those two ends up being in a somewhat high stress situation where it feels very tense between everyone. and it’s just like damn! is it always like that?? why do those two even care that much about their jobs if their boss is a bit of a dick? etc. i think even an additional scene or two with those guys (either alone or the both of them) talking with gus in a more normal situation could’ve both added a bit more depth into how gus treats his employees (we got a lot with how he treats lyle and co., but not a whole lot with the illegal side of things), how comfortable vic and tyrus feel around him in a calmer setting, and exactly why they both feel the need to be as loyal as they are to the guy.

and also on the other side of this i don't think it'd hurt to maybe elaborate on their pay just a bit..? i'm not saying to randomly put a number out into the atmosphere but i just mean some smaller things like. do they buy nicer things for themselves? what's their housing situation? what's their car situation? are the escalade / yukon their own vehicles or does gus just use those two for business situations? do they use them when they're doing their own stuff off the clock or do they have their own cars? etc. that can also help with understanding their motivations a bit. don't get me wrong i don't think they should be visibly rich or something because that's not what gus would want but just smaller things! cause it's easy to write their loyalty off as Well they probably get paid super well, which i'm sure is true, but if they don't show a single hint of that then what's the point. even something as simple as giving tyrus a nice watch, or maybe victor having a nicer looking gun, etc. something small like that. because as it stands right now the average 41 year old viewer who watched the show once only knows and will only ever know victor and tyrus as those two guys in the background who do random stuff for gus with no clear motivation. just the personification of "On it boss (salute emoji)". and to be honest this is true for a whole lot of fans who do watch the show multiple times and enjoy thinking about it more in depth, because on screen we barely have anything about the two.

and to be clear i'm not trying to say we should have an episode just for them or something like no i understand they're side characters. i understand we don't need all that. and i understand this is also primarily Jimmy's show. but it's not like these two are on the same level as like, arlo or paige and kevin etc. these guys have been around since brba. victor was literally introduced in the same episode gus was. and they are a huge part of gus's story, especially in brba. s4 wouldn't have been what it was without victor and tyrus. and in bcs, ignacio's situation wouldn't have been the same if it weren't for victor and tyrus as well. and i just personally believe that if their goal with gus in bcs was to go back and elaborate on how everything came to be and show what he was like a few years younger, they could've dragged victor and tyrus into that. and i think his character would've benefited from taking that extra step with those two.

[room-surprise]

Yeah I figured it was a reference to a previous ask! I vaguely remembered you getting an ask like this in the past, and wanting to comment on it back then, but not having time LOL so this time I made sure to reblog so I could share my opinion. Sorry, this is going to be long and a bit meandering. I ended up having to look back and forth in the manga for all kinds of references... 😩

I agree that we don't know exactly what happened with Mithrun, the version we see is from Kabru's imagination, and he's summarizing the events - and Mithrun even says that Kabru got various details wrong, so we can assume that we are being presented with the general idea of what happened, minus anything that Kabru thinks is "too complicated" for Laios to understand...

(Based on Kabru's opinion on Laios, this most likely means omitting any complex emotions, relationships, or politics.)

However, Kui also wants to communicate with us efficiently (she is telling a LOT of story VERY quickly), so while things have been simplified, I don't think she's trying to trick us by drawing deceiving things. In other words, I think we are meant to accept most of the story as true, but to be aware that it's more complex than what Kabru tells us.

So in response to that first question asker, I think it's debatable, and that fans disagree on if Mithrun knew or didn't know if his companions in the dungeon were monsters, if they were real people or monsters, if they started as people and got replaced, if some were monsters and some were people all along... and we can't give a certain answer based solely on what we know from the manga or extra materials so far.

The only things I feel comfortable saying definitively is that the snake spouse was not the real person in any way, because there's no way they (Sultha) were in the dungeon, and no way for the demon to bring them into the dungeon, and we know the dungeon only seems capable of using monsters to make fake copies of people, based on the target's knowledge of the person and how they desire them to act. So the snake spouse Mithrun interacted with is just a copy.

I also don't think we can actually say if Mithrun fought his own comrades at any point or not. He might have, he might not. All we do know is that a lot of them died, which Mithrun describes as "being devoured by the dungeon."

It's implied, but not explicitly shown that Milsiril and Helki went into the dungeon with Mithrun's team... and they got out of the dungeon alive, and came back five years later.

(Might be Milsiril on the left side of the image, and in both images they seem to be walking somewhere after passing through a hole in a wall.)

So we know a lot of the original squad died in the dungeon, but we genuinely don't know if all of them died, and when and how those deaths happened.

So then, for my personal opinion about how aware Mithrun is in the dungeon...

I think the demon seduces and ensnares its prey, similar to the psychic succubus mosquitos, or a magic mirror. Kui introduces the demon to us for the first time during the succubus story, and the chapter cover for "Winged Lion" isn't a picture of the winged lion, but instead "monsters that capture your heart", including the succubi and magic mirrors, implying that the demon is also this type of creature.

(There are other types of monsters shown like the nightmares, mimics, mermaids, etc. which I think is an obfuscation tactic in this case, to make what Kui is doing less obvious. She still wants us to think the WL might possibly be a good guy.)

Like the succubi and the mirror, the demon doesn't need to understand your desire, and you don't have to admit to your desire or consent to it, but it will reflect what is inside of you, and its power allows it to give you what you want.

Kui repeatedly associates mirrors with the demon, but never actually has the main cast fight against a mirror monster (I'd guess because she thought it would be redundant).

And from the way the demon keeps trying to give Marcille copies of people (her father, Falin) I think we're meant to understand that the demon prefers to make copies of people: it's easier, and copies will never get in the way by having free will. They'll keep the dungeon lord pacified, which is what the demon needs so it can feed off of them.

As for Mithrun's friends in the dungeon looking "too lively" compared to Marcille's father to be copies or illusions...

They are more lively than Marcille's father, but Marcille's father is only one type of shapeshifting monster, a doppelganger. Not all monsters that imitate humans in Dungeon Meshi do such a bad job of it.

Is that because doppelgangers are bad mimics that don't need to be convincing? Is it because Marcille isn't cooperating with the doppelganger because she doesn't want it around? We don't know but either possibility makes sense.

Mithrun's friends in the dungeon seem well within the capabilities of the shapeshifter (tanuki), the succubi mosquitos, or maybe a mirror. And we know one tanuki can make multiple illusions of four people at the same time, and that some of them are so convincing that people have a hard time telling them apart from their real loved ones.

(Very lively succubi)

(Tanuki shapeshifter copies.)

Kui's also shown us that even the tanuki shapeshifter (which can make incredibly accurate copies) will make poor quality copies if the target doesn't actually know the person they're copying, or doesn't really have an interest in them:

I think the biggest difference between Marcille's doppelganger and Mithrun's friends is Mithrun and Marcille's desires.

Marcille doesn't want her father's copy around, she's resisting the very idea of it existing at all. She knows that it's a copy because she knows her father is dead, that information is deeply rooted in her psyche and not something she can easily forget... She isn't giving the doppelganger octopus more than her most basic memories to play off of. She isn't cooperating.

But the power of the dungeon is so great that she seems to forget her objections eventually and refers to the doppelganger as her father, and gives it a job to do (though she does seem embarrassed about it)... and this all happens within hours of Marcille becoming Dungeon Lord.

Mithrun wants to be where he is, he wants those friends and that lover to be with him, he wants them to love him unconditionally, and never hurt his feelings. He probably doesn't care if they're real or not, his desire is shallow and selfish, he doesn't love any of them, he loves what they can give him and do for him.

In other words, he is giving the dungeon everything it needs to weave a convincing illusion... and if they act "wrong", would he even care? Would he know? How well does he know them? As long as they're giving him what he desires he'll be happy.

Now, again, it's hard to say what exactly happened in the dungeon since Kabru is retelling the story, but Kui is also probably not trying to make things super complicated and hide basic details.

I think it's clear from the art in the manga that Mithrun swings wildly between being in a delusional state as Dungeon Lord, and being aware of what's happening.

Mithrun's dead expression only goes away when he's interacting with things he doesn't want (gold strippers robbing the dungeon).

(I think the unconscious Canary we see in the left panel is probably supposed to be one of Mithrun's "friends" (real or fake), that was knocked unconscious by the gold peelers while attempting to defend the dungeon.)

When the demon begins to eat him, he starts out dead-eyed and confused, but when he realizes something is wrong, his pupils come back and he begins to struggle:

And as a last thought, I'll just add that the only image we really have of Mithrun's friends during his time as the dungeon lord shows them around a table covered with empty plates and no real signs of food or drink.

We know Kui can draw lavish banquets and beautiful food, she can draw plates that have been decimated with only scraps left behind, to indicate that a feast took place. Why did she leave the table so conspicuously empty in this panel?

I think it is supposed to hint that all except for two of the people in that scene don't eat, because they've been replaced. Kui also avoids showing most of their faces, and the one whose face we can see is one of the people with food on his plate...

(He and the Canary next to him are also the only two people at the table who seem to not be focused on Mithrun.)

But again, it's all debatable, and there isn't a concrete answer for sure. It depends on how you read it and what you feel Kui was trying to communicate...

But I think "Mithrun was delusional and not fully aware, and his friends were replaced by copies or died over time" is probably the most accurate way of describing it, based on everything else Kui shows us about the Dungeon Lords.

Personally I agree with you that Mithrun knew his friends were all illusions, and tbh, I think he was very okay with it

About Mithrun vs Marcille on the demon's copies of real-life people: Mithrun's desires were all related to image and self-worth, never the actual people in his dungeon. He didn't necessarily want the real thing - arguably he doesn't even like Sultha since he thought of the real one as "sketchy" - he just wanted the image of her, he wanted the image of being better than his brother, he wanted the image of having friends, etc. I believe that's why he was so okay with the demon making fake copies of his friends. It contrasts Marcille being so against the lion's attempt to make a copy of her dad. She wanted her actual father, so she strongly rejected the copy. But Mithrun didn't necessarily want Sultha, he wanted the image of her and the pride that came with her choosing him over his brother, so he likely didn't care that the demon was just making illusions. I agree with you that he was aware, at least on a subconscious level, that he was just playing pretend.

There's also that quote where it said his desire was to be safe from anyone who could harm him. It's possible that he was a bit afraid/paranoid of the real-life counterparts, and thought the illusion people couldn't possibly hurt him, so he felt safer around the fake people and ended up preferring them. This way he could have his friends and his girlfriend without the constant fear of getting hurt. He could feel wanted and important and loved without being on edge about what they secretly thought of him, or if they secretly wanted to hurt him. That's exactly what he wanted - the illusions fulfilled his desires better than the real counterparts ever could.

I don't really think it's a matter of image, there was nobody there to put on a show for, the show of having friends was before her became a dungeon lord, to me it's more that If you really believe nobody could ever love the real you, fake friends created by the demon is ok

Marcille had a father that truly loved her and friends that she wanted to protect, so it makes sense she was averse to the version made up by the demon at first, from the hints we get Mithrun had nobody he had a real connection with (here exemplified by what he thought of his teamates and the impression Milsiril had of him contrasted with the dungeon)

I don't really understand if other than Sultha the others are real canaries that ended up being driven away just like people were driven away from Thistle, I don't really put it past them to fall for the demon with the promise of a safer life where they don't have to risk their lives only to realize the downwards spiral is inescapable for the dungeon lord.

I don't think it's as important if he "really liked" Sultha or not, I think it's more related to insecurity and fear of rejection, having his brother chosen over him even tho "he's better" (the "perfect youth" image)

Mithrun was thrown away for being a bastard so being faced with the life he could have had probably broke him, I think there's some pride involved too in a twisted way but I read more like something related to "the life I wish I had", envy/jealousy like Milsiril describes. Being able to love and be loved back was never an option especially after joining the canaries

The illusion of this wasn't perfect as we can see, and with the paranoia and everything I doubt he ever really "preferred" the fakes to real life but rather it was all he had?

Idk I'm not good with words hope this made some sense, but even Marcille who said the recreation of her dad was "unnecessary" (quite the underreaction) still kept him around until the others defeated him so I don't really know what it says about Mithrun, maybe if he wasn't imprisoned into the book he could have manipulated Thistle into accepting a fake Delgal too?

[sonicfrontiers]

youre the person who got me to watch a playthrough of mouthwashing so youre the one i'll ask - who's saying/thinking "i hope this hurts" and who is it directed to?

oh i'm happy/sorry to hear that i'm the one who got you to watch it lol!

honestly this is something that i've wondered a lot myself. despite the fact that i've watched like 5 playthroughs of mouthwashing there are still so many things that i still don't think i've fully grasped - for instance, i was very confused about the point of the nightmare sequence curly has during the first flashback (curly isn't going to do anything, so what's with the ominous red plane and alarms?) until i saw someone in the tag posit that it could represent curly willfully ignoring and wading past all of jimmy's warning signs, and it clicked.

as for "i hope this hurts," like i said, i'm honestly not sure. the simplest answer to me is that it's a representation of jimmy's train of thought; his envy of curly's position and power manifesting as resentment for curly, his looking down on anya and seeing her as something lesser and to be used, his general distaste with swansea (afaik the two of them never have anything nice to say to each other, right?), and his resentment of daisuke as well (for having parents that "have him covered"). everything he does, he does to hurt the rest of them. now i don't think that's his conscious belief - he probably justifies it to himself with the same talk he uses against the rest of them. it's not his fault, he's the responsible one, he deserves to be captain, etc, etc. but at a core level, he's hurting them because he can, and he wants to. it makes him feel better. it makes him feel more powerful. so, i hope this hurts.

realistically i believe this is most likely, however there are plenty of other interpretations of the phrase that hold water too! what's most interesting to me are the places it shows up - namely, at the start of the game, under the rest of the information given about the tulpar crew.

i don't really know if i have anything totally concrete to say about this, but i do find it really interesting that this is how it all starts. if the rest of this information is from a given source, is "i hope this hurts" from that same source too? and if that's the case, who or what is that source? pony express? i honestly doubt "i hope this hurts" is from the company though. pony express isn't malicious, it just doesn't care.

so... dunno where that leaves this train of thought, lol. just something that's been nagging at me. i could be grasping at nothing though! i just think it's really interesting that "i hope this hurts" is important enough to be given to us to frame the entire rest of the game alongside setting the scene of the long haul space freighter.

you could probably construe it to be from curly towards jimmy, if you wanted - perhaps his desire for revenge after jimmy causes what mutilates him, unable to be spoken but manifesting in these words throughout the game. maybe it's jimmy's guilty conscience. maybe it can represent each of the crew members in their own ways.

i'm open to any of these interpretations! one of the best parts of pieces of art like mouthwashing that are so short yet packed full of meaning is that little bits like these can be taken and stretched out to fit so many interesting different viewpoints, so i'm really glad you asked me to share mine! it made me think about this in ways i haven't before :) and i hoped this helped you think about it too!

[yusufstits]

thinking about nile having nightmares and not being able to sleep post london and then being very tired during the day and taking naps on whoever's around

[xxplastic-cubexx]

sorry if you've already mentioned but what (re?)ignited your love of comics/x-men/cherik? curious because there are so many different adaptations of them

i think im gonna speak for a few (or a lot of) people when i say that TL;DR the wolverine x deadpool movie that came out this summer is what pulled me back into comics and i COULD leave it there but i will go into excruciating and unnecessary detail instead because i love an origin story and i love oversharing.

under the cut tho because im nice sometimes (there's also wxdp doodles in here. if you want to see that)

ironically (and probably commonly), growing up i was more of an avengers kid. Kinda. Loosely <- binge watched the cartoons and movies and read copious amounts of comics and fics and i am hoarding fanart in my old dresser as we speak ok 'loosely' is a modest lie.

embarrassingly i remember getting into discus cause of captain america LMAO so yeah needless to say i was a Humble Fan- me joining my school's comic class/club didnt help either (shoutout to my teach from that she was the realest one out there for. A Multitude of reasons). she definitely is was inspires me to even draw still and make comics and i often think bout the tips i learned from her class tbh she was great

back to the movies t and comics tho, i got into em because my brother would offer to take me and that's how we'd hang out (i rarely saw movies in theaters and i even more rarely went anywhere as a teenager. still kinda like that today tbh ooops) and yk. it just snowballed after that.

my brother and i have always liked comics- he just more than me for a while (though he still very much loves comics and As We Know From My Posts we still talk about them whenever i see him To An Exhausting Degree)

durin then i was really into stony and i have a few surviving doodles i made but those are between me and god. and anyone who asks tbh LOL

'snap can you make this related to x-men again this is long' ok so fast forward to This Summer again I Still Don't Really See Movies but my brother offered to take me and this was the first time i'd actually seen an x-men movie in full

as a kid i only remember seeing the 'perfection' scene between erik and raven in first class while i was channel surfing. pretty sure i changed the channel after seeing mystique naked cause i was scared my parents would get mad at me if they caught me watching it LOL

BUT MOVING ON As A Kid i think it's also natural you'll sometimes watch 92 if it's on And I Did though evidently it didn't stick too hard (i do remember really liking beast and gambit though.... still do really): my knowledge of x-men was. INCREDIBLY sparse. like diabolically so so i didnt have too much expectations (aside from the fact i vaguely liked deadpool beforehand).

tbh i dont know why my bro never took me to see any of the x-men movies. it's not like he doesn't Also like x-men (90% sure nightcrawler's his favorite but my brother will be caught dead saying he has absolute favorites like that)- he owns a bitch load of deadpool comics/omnibus sets too (of which ive read over the years and reread this year) but Shrug moving on

Much Like Most Of The Internet i fell down the rabbit hole that way. i have some doodles i made a couple days after seeing WxDP that i now have an excuse to throw at all of you Look And Perceive

and so. As I Do. i got curious and told myself i'd binge watch all the x-men movies the week before i went back to school And Then I Did ft. My Brother Sometimes and then i said i'd binge watch all of '92 and And I Did That ft. My Brother Sometimes But Less So and now we're here. currently watching Evolution...

once i got to school i realized i lived near a comic shop and started getting into the comics that way (the first ones i got since going down this rabbit hole was Magneto Was Right!, The Resurrection of Magneto, and The Trial of Magneto. if you were curious !!!!! clearly i didnt care too much about context i just needed to see My Guy jelvejlkvj i have no regrets and Evidently ive read more since)

i'm pretty sure what dragged me into cherik specifically was the fact i saw a clip of The Famous ending to 92 where erik's aghast at the notion jean even has to question his love for charles. i think that was what officially had me refocus my lens on them: not a single poolverine thought after that LOL (all the cherik posting i saw on twitter definitely helped too but that was the nail in the coffin for any other interests i had: i was locked into cherik and x-men in general now)

that clip specifically, i was surprised at the fact they- frequently even- have the x-men franchise say erik loves charles and vice versa so bluntly. even if it's not meant to be romantic, i fear im just a fan of how casually the word's thrown around with them two and i got tender bout it all. Then Yk. i just live for the drama. the hilarity even. the sincerity .... they make me sick if i think of them too long so im gonna end it here

before i go tho ironically enough, the first x-men issue i owned was This one (story a this is that while stuck in some wacko dimension charles accidentally gets himself trapped in logan's mind while utilizing his astral projection. if you were curious). pretty sure i got it for free with another comic set i got years ago since our old comic shop loved to do that, but it's poetic aint it. maybe ill doodle something referencing it..

i should probably look into finishing this arc someday im Dummy curious to even know how it started and how it ends.....

[loser-female]

"misogyny actively ruins my life" is something that regardless of you being "privileged" will exist, there is no need to apologise about it, even if it's just "I know other people have it worse!" Who cares in the moment you're venting about your own life to your partner?

I'm cooked by the 5 reports I wrote today and I'm not understanding if this is you playing a scenario or a conversation that actually happened.

If it's the first part, in my country we say "don't put bandages on your head before your break it", it serves no purpose.

Not to mention you should be allowed to complain about things in a relationship, even if your thoughts are disorganised, even if it doesn't make sense to the other - the point is either find a solution or receive moral support, not play devil's advocate.

I don't know enough of your situation to be more practical.

If it's the second:

A thing a lot of people might not like to hear: a lot of prejudice is subconscious and they don't realise that until they are actually told about it, then will get defensive (there is a psychological reason for this and there are ways around it too, too long to explain on a Tumblr post). But the correct answer to this is not "you're making things up". Is "I'll pay more attention next time", or "I'm sorry this happens", "I didn't know it was this bad" - dismissiveness is not... A good reply. I would be extremely pissed if I said "this thing ruins my life and I want to change it" and the answer i got was "ok lol you crazy" or a rant about how I have it better than other people. That's empathy 101 to me.

Ok radblr community I need some help understanding and conceptualising my thoughts rn, I need words to explain it

I live in a privileged country, the UK. I am relatively well off, I have an amazing family and support system. I have a boyfriend (controversial in my head). I would like to explain to said boyfriend how I feel about misogyny. I don't know how to explain that even tho on pretty much every other axis I'm privileged, misogyny is a massive problem that actively decreases my quality of life and I would like to fight for myself and other women who don't have it so good.

From his point of view, I sound insane I know. I'm living fine and well and suddenly I start yapping about feminism as I'm the most oppressed ever. But I don't know how to explain that it is actually that bad, even if not for me for other women. I don't know how to explain the subtleties of misogyny and how it's baked into everything to actively make my life worse. Idk

I need words and concepts to understand my place in society basically

[longagoitwastuesday]

Going through the Utahim.e tag had me checking several times if at some point I had clicked on the G.ojo/Utahim.e one instead

[aubins]

she is rasping and literally crawling toward yuri with big wet eyes because the week has been very unkind to her and she's a little scraped up from getting caught in a wilderness trap but don't even worry about it. however! she reaches them and her fluffy head perks up.

"yuri! yuri, we weren't on the same island last week, and bernie didn't want to miss you just in case—" rustle, rustle. from her belongings, she fishes out a lilac-ribboned box. inside there is makeup, carefully curated and dorothea-certified of course, along with a flower accessory she'd made herself. its blossom is the color of their eyes, which she is doing her very best to meet now, thank you very much.

(in fact, she's trying so hard that it pinches her brow just slightly. eye contact will always be her worst enemy but god if she isn't pulling out all the stops to show her earnestness. they deserve that much and plenty more.)

"happy, uh, early birthday...!" the gift is ushered into their possession. then her arms flap at her sides, and she blurts: "please don't get eaten by alligators, okay?! wait, are there alligators on this island? w-well, don't get eaten by anything! please. um, yes." nod, nod. "i don't get this whole competition thing, but you're still bernie's dear friend. and bernie really, really wants to keep being friends by the time your next birthday comes, too."

a pause. then, lips curl into a silly, fond smile that bernadetta can't help but make. "a-and it doesn't have anything to do with this weird island, but, um... you make me happy. so i hope this makes you happy, too."

Yuri Leclerc does not celebrate their birthday.

Sometimes, there are exceptions. Like the treats and surprises of a certain red-haired girl or the odd greeting here and there from Abyssians who have known them for long enough to learn it. Yet no matter how routine these exceptions start to become, they will always be just that: exceptions. Because, for so long, the day they'd said was theirs never really was their birthday anyway. Because, a long time ago, the boy who was born on their actual birthday died on the streets of Adrestia.

“Bernadetta,” is their hummed greeting as their gaze flicks over her, pleased— well, always pleased, really, to see her, and even more so when she appears to be in relatively one piece— their usual smile curling at the corner of their lips. “That for me?” they ask, tone teasing as she fishes the box from her belongings. It's not even my birthday yet, is the follow up, already upon the tip of their tongue when—

“Happy, uh, early birthday...!”

And Yuri blinks, stunned for a moment, because no, they think, they will never quite get used to these exceptions. Even as Bernadetta shuffles the gift into their hands, babbling that they shouldn't get eaten by alligators, if there even are any— “No,” they think they hear themself say automatically, first instinct always to reassure, “I haven't seen any alligators. And I won't get eaten, so don't even worry about it.”— and that they're her dear friend— “...ah?” is the only sound they make in response to that one, a little quiet and a little confused, because there's no automatic answer to it, not one that they want to give to such a genuine effort anyway.

They glance at the box now in their hands for a beat, then pull it open gently, as if afraid it might break. “You didn't have to,” Yuri says, gaze immediately attracted to the collection of makeup within. They know, of course, what it costs, and suddenly mean it doubly so. “Must've cost you a pretty penny. You should've spent it on yourself.” And even if some people would say it just to be humble, humility has never been one of their features. They know what they do and do not deserve.

After all, Yuri is no stranger to gifts like these. Makeup and jewelry offered to them because only the finest of accessories should decorate the most beautiful dolls— and never for free, of course, because nothing in this world is ever for free, and they are quite used to trading both face and body.

They kept them all, no matter how they loathe them sometimes. They may be prideful, but they are not foolish. There is a trunk under the floorboards beneath their bed in Abyss filled with their hoard, bountiful enough to convince someone they are a magpie and not a mockingbird. Bountiful enough to remind them that, now, the Savage Mockingbird can take a noble's expensive gift and slit his throat while wearing it if they wanted, then toss it without a second thought to disappear within their collection.

But while Bernadetta is a noble, she is not like them. (But how do you know? asks a voice. Yuri silences it. They just do— they must believe that.) Not because of this island, she says next, and as much as Yuri can guess where her mind tends to spiral to, they wonder if she can do the same. Because they would have thought it next, yes, wondered about an objective handed to her in the interim that perhaps needed completing or some other game their hosts wanted to play. Even with the reassurance, they might have still wondered.

But maybe it is because it is Bernadetta, because she had known them before they were Yuri, and know all the secrets and vulnerabilities that come with that, because no matter how many times she says she has forgiven them, Yuri is used to bracing for betrayal, that the mockingbird pauses. Briefly, yet completely and utterly struck still mid-flight.

And then they believe her, even when the first instinct ingrained in them is not to.

“It...” they start, then pause. Correct themself. “You make me happy, Bernadetta. With or without the gift. But thanks for thinking about my birthday.” Because it's nice to be thought about, in the end. If it needs to be put simply for her, without the mess of their past, then it— and she— makes them happy. Bernadetta doesn't need to know the rest. Yuri grins, then plucks the flower accessory from the box to hold out to her. This one, they can think about without straining their smile. No shadow haunts it; this one is just Bernadetta. “Help me put it in my hair?”

Next birthday, we'll still be friends. But they do not say it aloud. This one is a promise all for themself. Yuri resolves not to break it.

[korrasamibottles]

I can’t figure out if Asami has a little ocd or if she’s like. The least ocd person ever. Wildly disorganized. Papers and gadgets everywhere. Thoughts

I don't know about ocd because that can manifest in a lot of different and unexpected ways unrelated to being organized BUT I actually do have a lot of weird headcanons about how organized Asami is (or isn't) depending on the situation, so THANK YOU for asking......

I think growing up with a wealthy, famous, and influential father could've given her some sort of complex about needing to look composed and competent at all times, regardless of whatever she might've been experiencing internally.

And I'm sure she was under an incredible amount of pressure to make sure Future Industries continued running successfully when she took over, and since she was a 20yo woman stepping into the shoes of a 50yo man, I think it makes sense to say that maybe she felt like she needed to appear hypercompetent or else nobody would take her seriously.

What I'm getting at here is that I like to think Asami might struggle to stay organized in the traditional sense of the word, but she doesn't want anybody to know it, and she spends a lot of energy making sure they don't.

SO:

I think the warehouses and workshops at Future Industries are the most well-organized places on the planet. Every tool has its proper place, every single item down to washers and bolts has its own bin, and everything–everything–is labelled. If the show was set some decades after the 1920s she'd be running around with one of those little portable label makers, but alas. She writes them out by hand. Her system works perfectly and everyone is encouraged to help maintain it so PLEASE put those bolt cutters back in the exact spot you found them thank you 😁 <-this is Asami feeling unhinged and smiling through it.

Her office at work looks nice and clean and organized. 50 million (labeled) folders tucked away into file cabinets that don't have a speck of dust on them. But I KNOW she has a junk drawer in her desk. Maybe even an entire junk closet where she stashes things she doesn't have a good place for because oh god a potential investor will be here in five minutes and the place is a mess since she started tinkering between meetings. She's still able to keep track of things because she has A System, but nobody else would be able wrap their head around how her system works. If anyone other than Asami opened the junk closet, I think it would look like one of those images deliberately edited to make everything in it unrecognizable:

Home is where the pattern really breaks down. To me. I think the places guests might reasonably see are neat and tidy, but her and Korra's room is a mess and they're both too busy to care. And besides what would be the point of trying to appear perfect when they've seen each other naked and heard each other fart. You know. Korra will ask if Asami's seen her hairbrush, and Asami will be like "oh yeah sorry it's on the chair by the window underneath the jacket I wore today." And so on.

Her mini home workshop is a disaster. She knows exactly where her wire cutters are when she needs them because she remembers setting them down and dumping a heap of tangled wire on top of them yesterday, but like. It doesn't look good. Nobody should ever try to "help" by rearranging things though, because then she won't be able to find anything.

TL;DR: I think she's a bit neurotic and hyperorganized at work, and around strangers/people she doesn't know well/people around whom she feels she needs to project an image of competency. But when she's at home and around people she trusts, she can let herself relax a bit and put the Perfectionism Demon down for a nap. My thots.

[risingsunresistance]

Same with the if you like but not reblog il block you thing. To me it seems really rude and makes me more inclined to unfollow than anything else.

FR... again i understand wanting more interaction on your art, it's pretty normal to want people to enjoy stuff you also enjoy and stuff you put time and effort into , but you GOTTA think about how it's gonna come across. "if you dont share my art even if you liked it you're getting blocked so you can never see it again" well suddenly your art isnt as nice as i thought it was...

also, maybe i thought it was amazing and i just HAVE to share... but i dont want my followers to feel obligated to reblog your art and feel guilty if they scroll past, i dont wanna make someone's day worse! so now i wont reblog it for their sake! it's just too hateful of a mentality :/

yes reblogs ARE better than likes in like the most basic functionality of this website. no one sees your likes, sharing is caring etc. but i think everyone should be required to read this post outloud once a month

[dimiclaudeblaigan]

it's so interesting for me to hear that houses localization changed the script to vilify(?word?) the church bc when i played the game (i recently finished my first and so far only playthrough in lions route) for the first half of the game i was waiting for the shoe to drop to reveal the church is the big bad guys but it never came and the revealed was actually ed. idk if it should have been obvious but i was too focused on suspecting the church to see it or if it was actually subtle as i tend to be oblivious to hints(¿word again?) given in media lol.

idk where im going with this but i hope it makes at least some sense bc i am so sleep deprived rn

and the thing tou said about Henry being changed i am so curious of that too

hope you have a nice day and better sleep than me!

I'll answer the last part first since the rest is more descriptive.

Basically Henry went to Wizard School (tee em) and it was a cool and great experience. In JP, it was... iirc basically close to torture/hellish? It was a more mature situation/topic, but the loc changed it to be silly and fun sounding. For some reason Treehouse in particular seems deeply if not fatally allergic to mature topics and/or properly handling them.

Thank for about the sleep comment and I assure you, I sleep too often!! I wish I could send you some of my sleep and make it extra quality for you. :(

As for Three Houses, yeah, in AM it doesn't really happen that way. Nobody is really vilified (not even the imperialist warmonger invading neutral lands!) in AM (same with AG in Hopes).

What you saw/understood was the whole point! It was made it look at first like the Church was suspicious, but then the reveal was meant to be no, it was a fellow house leader all along. That was what the red herring part about the Church was all about. You were supposed to suspect the Church at first, hence Jeralt's warnings, and if you're playing GD, Claude's suspicions.

Unfortunately what happens in the other routes, especially in CF, is that Rhea's trauma is never explored, no characters stop to understand her motivation, etc. She's just used as the resident bad guy because she's Edelgard's enemy. Basically, you're seeing it from the point of view that Rhea is bad because you see it from Edelgard's perspective... but it fails to work because the game, in particular the localization, amps Edelgard up as a huge progressive hero. AM is the only route that really confronts her about her "views", and even then, it's a mess because all the things she argues with Dimitri about aren't her end goal (i.e. they don't ever end up actually happening in the vast capacity she claims she's going to do).

About Edelgard:

The localization avoids any particularly negative comments about her and changes or outright removes them (true of Hopes as well). In Dimitri's case it would make sense because of their connection, but when it ends up just being another route in the pile of feeling sorry for Edelgard (and... not Rhea, who had her family massacred and their bones turned into weapons), it just feels stale.

They basically tell you Edelgard is very cute and easily embarrassed, and she's just this headstrong progressive woman fighting For The People (tee em). The truth is (as per the game itself, i.e. content they can't change/localized because it's the contents of the game itself) that she's invading innocent lands, conscripting her own citizens, turning her citizens into demonic beasts to add to her military strength (lelz when u can't even rely on ur nation's own military strength without demonic beasts), and victim blaming anyone who fights back (if you have yet to see the extremely infamous "no u" line from Edegard to Dimitri in CF, you've been blessed) among other things.

They basically shove it down your throat, characters and narrative both (in the loc in particular), that Edelgard is good and just, while the story itself is looking at all that like ???. The JP script still tries to take good care of her and her image, but they're a lot more blunt about her/her goals (i.e. they don't dance around them nearly as much).

The localization showers what she does with love and attention, and even when they have to say she's the problem/aggressor, they still pretty it up as much as possible (such as Dimitri wondering if maybe her vision of society could possibly be just and righteous, instead of outright admitting what she's done is absolutely atrocious when it's way worse than anything he ever did, all of which he admits to doing and takes responsibility for).

The JP version is more clear on her being the villain. There's definitely bias toward her (as the writers were, confirmed by an interview), but it doesn't slap you in the face with it nearly as badly. Also, Dimitri has won a character popularity poll every year since the game's inception in Japan. In the west, Edelgard is much more popular than she is in the east. That, of course, is because of the way the loc pushed the writing for her/about her.

Edelgard's "progressive" stuff is supposed to be just propaganda (which is ultimately, even as per the western endings because there's only so much they can change). The way the loc frames it is that it's actually what she's aiming for. It's what she uses to inspire people to fight for her though, not what she's actually doing.

About Rhea:

This one's the real doozy because it's a victim of the above. Since they wanted to pretty up Edelgard's dialogue and make her A Hero (tee em), they needed whoever her main enemy was to be the "villain". Since Edelgard, now popular because of the tweaks in her dialogue, hated and wanted to kill Rhea, so too did her raging fans who gave no fucks whatsoever about any character who opposed her... even if it was just to save their own life!

They changed the tone of Rhea's voice in the loc to make her more angry and villainous sounding, rather than sad or kind. She was basically altered in the loc to make Edelgard look better. Like, of course, in the perspective of playing a villain in CF, she's the bad guy and the enemy. The problem comes when they have Rhea say things that are more aggressive than in the original script, and change her tone to sound demeaning and vicious (when she was otherwise not or not as much).

But like, why? The only reason any of us can think of is because they wanted to market Edelgard more. This is likely a result of the west's views and especially political views, since Edelgard's pretty words would sound good to a westerner's political beliefs... until you dig into them/the actual story content more.

Rhea also being the head of a Church probably got tweaked because of the west's recent irl views on religion. Religion in the west has been looked poorly upon in recent years. Instead of accepting this is just a fictional game though, the loc team just... pushed that they're Really Bad.

Rhea is more of a victim of them needing someone to be worse than Edelgard to make Edelgard look like less of a villain (which again, this isn't the case in the original script nearly as much), and they couldn't use Thales/the Agarthans because you were allied with them in that route.

The other characters vs Rhea as a villain choice:

The goal wasn't to make a playable lord a villain in the loc's case. It was the intention of the original script with Edelgard, but the loc tried to make her actions sound more justified because ??? like idk, I can't wrap my head around them justifying what she does.

Dimitri isn't handled too badly by the narrative itself and he's overall seen as a good person (even the loc didn't alter that or Edelgard's ablest mentality toward a mentally unwell person), so he wasn't really a good candidate for all that. Also, Dimitri's story is one of recovery, and because they ventured into mental illness, he wasn't a good candidate. He was treated well and pretty fairly (Edelgard not treating him particularly well makes sense with her character, but the narrative itself doesn't push him as being a monstrous person. Even in the time he considers that he was, there's depth, logic and complexity to the situation).

Claude being the main bipoc character would have just been an all around disaster if the loc or even original script tried to make him the top villain, yadda yadda (understandably). There was no chance that was going to go over well, especially in the west (have you seen the shitstorm GW caused? And that was with the writing not considering him a villain!!). He was basically safe from the get go as far as villainy if they writers/localizers didn't want serious backlash (there are discussions about the overall treatment of poc characters in Houses/Hopes, but I can guarantee it would've been legit backlash if he was made to be a genuinely and intentionally horrible person, so that wasn't really an option if they wanted this game to actually sell and be enjoyed).

So since Rhea isn't playable and is the head of a Church, that kind of makes her the only candidate. Players will get attached to the other lords and not like killing them, so it won't feel like a badass victory to kill them. I guess for some reason the loc team just... hated Rhea or something?

Dimitri's death in CF is either extremely sad and garners audience sympathy, or in the other version of his death in CF it's clear his mentally stability is starting to break right before he's killed, which in and of itself is another topic. Claude is either free to go by choice of the player or can be killed, and his death is sad and he's not villainized. Aside from how some characters treat Claude's death (in contrast to Dimitri's which is never outright villainized even by Edelgard), the scene meant for the player at the time it happens is supposed to leave a bad taste in your mouth.

So again, it really just leaves the loc team with the option of Rhea if they want to make the final battle seem like a big victory for the player. VW also has its big happy victory, and surprise surprise, Rhea dies in that route (offscreen no less!).

SS kills off Rhea but actually makes it sad, and it's, you know, actually the route that focuses on her/the Church most. AM doesn't kill her off and doesn't treat any character death as a badass victory, and instead gives a bittersweet ending (which again would be in line with Dimitri's connection to Edelgard, and it only feels botched down because of all routes obsessing over her).

So while, technically, the writing in the JP script wasn't trying to make Rhea as bad as the western version of the game, if the loc wanted to go for that, she was the best option. It just... came at the expense of butchering her character to make Edelgard shine, which shouldn't have been done but it was.

[atsu-i]

Because I'm in my 30's too and I feel like an ignorant kid who is lost. I can't seem to grasp the meaning of adulthood and feel accomplished as one, also when I was a kid I saw adults as people who had their shit together and know Lotta stuff meanwhile I am just an grown up with no knowledge about life.

:0

[lanliingwang]

listening to fgo lines starting with my most grailed servants and I'm thinking of several things atm:

god I used to be so sad whenever one of the Heroic Spirits got defeated in battle and had to say their incapacitated lines...

Arjuna's vocal range...like I love how soft his voice can get, but also when his tone hardens and becomes more serious/strict sounding it's also really cool (esp for his battle lines!!) He's also so polite usually and I love that aspect of him sm too

Also Arjuna's birthday line is still very like...god yeah I Get Where He's Coming From as a fellow Asian kid who was also taught to respect my elders asjdkgh. He and I can handshake emoji on that!

Also!! His lines for his Anniversary Outfit...he just sounds so much more carefree?? And all the talk of training really emphasize his dedication to improving himself asjdkgh his brothers (and a lot of people who were close to him in life tbh) would be proud!!

David's voice briefly dips closer to NakaYuu's usual range for his line for Tamamocat and I got a little 😳 I wish he had more lines that dipped into that particular range more bc it's such an interesting and cool change from his usual pitch

Genuinely cannot wait for David's recent voiceline update to reach NA, I want to be able to listen to his post-Solomon Bond Levels 4 and 5 lines more freely

(Also remembering the unexplored aspects of some of his voicelines...orz....Fate pls, I want to know more about what he thinks of his time as king!!)

(...I say, as if I haven't had a billion headcanons both from reading other David fans' takes and coming up with my own via reading outside of Fate)

[More under the cut bc vague LB6 spoilers for Oberon orz]

First and Second Ascension Oberon's voice really adds to why he can be perceived as trustworthy before the reveal in-story -- he just sounds?? really friendly (if a bit playful as befitting his 'role' as a Faerie King) even in his battle lines

(Also Oberon's extra attack lines in his early two ascensions are so playfully hammy asdjgkh)

All that said though, relistening to his lines in Third Ascension...it's actually both a notable contrast to earlier Ascensions' but also still sounds like the same character?? Which is pretty impressive honestly

His third skill line in Third Ascension is...really something else huh (I'm sure other Oberon fans would probably have something more to say about that though)

(And that's about all in terms of thoughts for now I think sjdgkh)