#I hate adobe with all of my heart

[motheatenclover]

Why arent we in the timeline where firealpaca is the industry standard instead of adobe and its stupid shit

[newvision]

If anyone knows any design agencies throughout the UK who are looking for interns (for half a year or one year), pleasee let me know!! I’m a graphic and communications design student (focusing on typography but willing to work in any field, in my fourth semester) and are looking to come to England for a year. I have top grades with an average of A/1.1. My professors are very renowned & well known in their field and would definitely write me a letter of recommendation! Thank you so much in advance <3

[joonsytip]

I love you, I'm sorry || Seungkwan

Pairings: Seungkwan x Fem!Reader

Synopsis: When he falls in the pit, you come to save him.

Warnings: mentions of accident, major character death, angst.

Word Count: 1.1k

[ SVT Masterlist ] [ SVT Flick - Fic Masterlist ]

“You came back, really?”

Seungkwan double takes, blinking his teary eyes. He looks around and pinches himself. It hurts his skin, he's not dreaming.

“Honey”, he rushes to you, engulfing you in his embrace. He inhales your scent, a sense of relief feeling his chest.

“I missed you.”, he pulls away, kissing your forehead.

You wipe his tears, “How could I not come?”, and smile, “I could never stay mad at you.”

Seungkwan smiles in relief. He takes your hands and sits you on the worn out couch, the one which he can't get rid off, the one which is bound to his sentiments. You caress the furniture, feeling the cotton tickling your fingers through the tears of the cover.

“You know right, that I didn't mean any of it?”, Seungkwan asks in desperation, “That it was all nonsense, something I said just out of fit.”

You nod, leaning in to press a soft kiss to his lips.

And you could feel the tension dissipate, when your lips meet his. Seungkwan melts under the touch, his both hands tightening their grip around you.

“The colours have faded, you should get the walls painted again.”, you sigh, your eyes wandering around your adobe. The one you both had built from scratch with love.

“We can do it together, like we've always done.”, he says, caressing your arms.

“I won't be able to do it this time.”, comes your quiet reply as you fidget with your fingers.

That's when Seungkwan notices your finger is void of the wedding band.

“Where's the ring? Did you give it for cleaning?”, he asks, sounding confused. Legit, because you never put it off and even if you do, it's Seungkwan who takes both of your rings for cleaning.

“Kwanie, they never found it.”,

Seungkwan looks at you, brows furrowed, “Who never found what?”

You look at him, helplessly.

“Kwanie, don't blame yourself. What happened wasn't your fault. I shouldn't have stormed out of the house on a rainy night–”

“Yes, but I too went overboard. I should have chased you as soon as you went out but I waited for myself to calm down instead. I'm sorry for that.”, he caresses your cheeks, “You're back, here with me, and that's what matters. I promise this won't happen ever again.”

Sobs wrack your body and Seungkwan gets worried.

“You need to accept it, Kwanie.”, you say in between hiccups, “You have to accept that I can no longer be with you. That my death wasn't your fault, it was no one's fault. The accident was bound to happen, it was my fate.”

The bubble bursts as Seungkwan gets pulled into the reality. He freezes as the memories of the past few days come back to him.

The cruel aftermath of a fight that claimed your life. How he was late to reach you, that you left him even before he got to you. How your hand that was void of the wedding band fell out of the blanket while they carried your body on the stretcher.

Seungkwan now remembers that he went back to the accident scene just to find your ring, the only jewellery you held dear, how you constantly emphasized that you hated to look at your hand without the ring on it.

He's to blame. His heart crushes as he recollects how his words had killed you even before the accident, which was so unfortunate that it claimed the life of the driver in the car as well.

“It's all because of me.”, he declares, as if more to himself, “I should have chased you, no, I shouldn't have started the fight. I-I’m to blame. It's my fault.”

You shake your head to which he looks at you with the most devastating eyes, “Don’t leave me please. If you have to go then take me with you.”

“I can't take you with me, you have your entire life ahead.”, you say smiling through your tears, “But I'll be waiting for you. Live to the fullest, check all the items on the bucket list we created. When it's time, come and find me. I'll listen to all of it.”

Seungkwan falls into the endless loop of despair. It's abyss, but the one with no end to pain. When he married you, his childhood sweetheart two years ago, after dating for more than ten years, he had made a promise to himself, that was to love you for the rest of his life, to be the partner you always looked for, to make you happy.

And though he'd love you for the rest of his life, he just can't bring himself to think about a life without you in it.

It's you, the one he grew up with, his first and only crush. The girl he dated, the woman he married.

“Promise me, Kwan, that you'll pick yourself up. Promise that you'd move on with life and if love knocks on your door again you'll accept it without feeling guilty. Even though I won't be present, I'll be always watching you.”

You hand him three carnations, one red, one pink and one white.

“Red carnations symbolise love and affection. Pink ones symbolise gratitude and white ones are for rememberance.”, a faint smiles graces on your lips,

“When you miss me, go to the garden. Look at the carnations and they'll convey my messages. The red ones mean that ‘I love you’. The pink ones will convey that ‘I’ll never forget you’. The white ones will remind you that I'm always with you.”

Seungkwan nods quietly, trying to muffle his sobs but the little trembles give it away. He doesn't dare to look up, he doesn't dare to meet your eyes.

Your tears have dried off, you don't think you can produce any more of them.

“Stop crying please. How am I supposed to leave you?”

“Then don't go.”, he begs, “I can't think of a life without you.”

You engulf him in a hug and he doesn't let himself get seperated from you. Seungkwan wants to forget everything, wants to live here with you.

“It's time, Kwanie. I'll have to go now.”

It settles in his bones and he steps back. He takes one final look at your face, with a sad smile, tears in his eyes and croak in his voice, he says, “I love you and I'm sorry for everything.”

You reiterate his words, “Thanks for everything. You taught me the meaning of love, camaraderie and loyalty. You're the partner I have ever wanted. You're so strong Kwanie, I know you'll move past this.”

Suddenly the water starts leaking through the roof and pours on you both.

You give him one last look, the water camouflaging your tears, “I love you and I'm sorry for leaving you behind. It's time for you to go back.”

Seungkwan feels his body shake and he wakes up to find himself near your grave with the rain pouring and three carnations in the shades of red, pink and white in his hand.

→ Do not copy, re-post, translate, or share any of my works on other platforms! All stories are copyrighted, joonsytip. ©️

[fiveredlights]

extended author's note for The DAUD

ah The DAUD. what is there to say about The DAUD. first time i’ve fallen out of my chair whilst writing actually. had a great bruise on my thigh for a fortnight and my head hurt for a day and i did blame benjamin.  

the many drafts of The DAUD

so originally The DAUD was just going to be the opening scene, straight to season launch, straight to the race and then the closing scene. which would’ve taken place at a mcdonald’s carpark mind you. 

daniel was admittedly much less depressed, much less anxious, but as i got to writing i just couldn’t ignore everything to do with [Redacted Race & Team] and obviously benjamin’s presence forced my hand and i just couldn’t pretend that daniel was all happy smiley sunshine etc. 

any reminders of f1, and i would feel another wave of grief hit me. it would happen again and again and again and all this grief and sadness would start to build up as anger and i don’t know where to place all the grief and sadness and anger. 

i had a lot of cues to drive all these big things and honestly like 99.9% just came from the haha in daniel’s post. like. maybe the overarching thesis of this whole fic is how much can one four letter word ruin my life and the answer is A LOT! 

the 0.01% is me feeling just so tired of f1 now. exhausted. wrung out. i hate change, and i know fear of it will not make it stop, but seeing everything and everyone move on so easily gutted my little heart out. i got so irrationally angry at the people who wanted daniel to do this, or that, etc because all that lingered in the background of my mind was the haha. if i devoted basically my whole life to a sport that turned on me and started hating me, i would devote myself to absolutely nothing for the rest of my life. which is maybe also why daniel really struggles with max’s presence. 

to him, it is only time before max turns around and starts hating him, just like the sport did. difficult to devote, when all they do is leave. 

weirdly i feel like this is some sort of spiritual successor of i’ll never leave (never mind) even though the max/daniel relationship are in two different places, but the daniel’s themselves are obviously similar. INLNM daniel ends the fic with hiding how he’s feeling, DAUD daniel starts the fic with him hiding how he’s feeling, until we slowly start to descend into the Snap Point. 

one draft had actually social media bits in it but that was quickly abandoned after i realised my university kicked me out of the adobe plan (which is so rude considering how much money i pay them every year) and i didn’t want to do the text version because it would break immersion—i’d already introduced the wikipedia page the chapter before. 

(but apparently i did write a text only version so that’ll be down there someone.) 

benjamin (and julian) 

here’s the thing. i have so many notes everywhere that express my bitter hatred towards benjamin. hated him. he was genuinely the most unwieldy character to write and i thought that about matthew. freudian slip. 

i would say it wasn’t until the last week, until i wrote the scene where he reheats the food for max i was like wait. actually. maybe you aren’t so bad. then he left and i was like maybe i do miss you.

(then i wrote the epilogue and i didn’t miss him at all.)

benjamin was originally called jaxson, but once julian came into play, jaxson was changed into benjamin and the rest is history. julian’s identity actually wasn’t meant to be revealed in the fic at all, not until the epilogue but benjamin just couldn’t keep his mouth shut. benjamin is somehow the worst and best secret keeper ever.

my favourite scene does go to him though. when max stabs his salad in the exact same way benjamin did earlier. my little heart goes and falls off a cliff. so endeared by these silly little guys and their silly little traits. 

daniel and the very unreliable narration

the thing is i don’t even know if they’re like dating by the end of it. they’re like 75% of the way there and the last 25% is just for them. if you asked max he would probably be like “yeah we’re together???” and if you asked daniel it would be “we’re working our way towards it” — but i think max knows that and they’re just taking it day by day. they have time. 

i knew i wanted to write his depression and his anxiety in a very specific way aka the way i know because it is easier to write what you know but i did *try* to focus on the physicality of it? i’m wording this horribly, but honestly a little bit for my own emotional stability and sanity, i needed daniel to zone in on the physical aspects vs the emotional. 

(look i was already opening a bag of worms writing about anxiety and depression—i too thought i had kept my own shit locked, loaded, thrown out the key, hashtag very good with everything, hashtag love and light, but with the amount of times i cried whilst writing this i’m not too sure.)

i actually don't know where i'm going with this. moving on.

random in universe lore drops

benjamin and julian drove for italian teams in f2/f3, julian for PREMA and benjamin for Trident. i don’t think julian’s with any driver academies right now, a free agent if you will.

there was a planned subplot where there was only two beds for three people because grace had stolen the third bed from daniel’s house for one of their relatives staying and never gave it back (there was no relative she was trying to reverse parent trap them)

this was deleted because they somehow ended up in one bed anyway. at this point i am 3 for 3 in max and daniel somehow ending up in one bed. okay i didn’t plan for it to happen it just happened! 

when daniel and max have children, they have two twin girls name jemima and julianne :)

easter eggs

because it wouldn’t be a FRL-fic if i didn’t refer to my other children at least once! 

the blue sweater max throws at daniel is the same blue sweater he stole/is wearing during their veranda-sunrise scene in glitter on the floor prequel -> daniel is wearing it this time during their balcony-night time scene :) 

julian’s favourite cowboy song is cowboy like me, famously sung by takes one to know one daniel to max. not too much on CLM benjamin… do you KNOW how important that song is to max and daniel in that universe? (also originally they were throwing phones at each other before i cut it out because we gotta tone them down)

know in my heart i wanted the cats quentin and ziggy to either be gary and steve OR matthew and callan. gary and steve i could’ve probably got away with, but matthew and callan are just too blatant. but know deep in my heart i wanted it to be them. 

the enchante collection daniel and max go through is very vaguely intended to be the Enchanté x MV33 collection from old habits, but obviously without the MV33. 

the social media deleted bits

(originally LL was still in RB and benjamin was going to finish in P10. but i decided that even fictional RB doesn’t deserve anything good, so no points for you!) 

Formula 1 F1 · 17 Feb

The wait is almost over for the biggest F1 launch event ever 🙌

F1 75 Live at The 02 is happening tomorrow! With livery reveals from all 10 teams, interviews with drivers and team principals, it’s an unmissable event 🤩

(Keep an eye out at the 2025 DAUD reveal… we heard it’s a big name 👀)

#F1 #F175Live

129 replies 482 reposts 8,291 likes

Visa Cash App Racing Bulls VisaCashAppRB ·  17 Feb

1️⃣ MORE SLEEP 😴

Who else is ready to see our 2025 livery and meet our DAUD  🙋

[Photo: The car underneath a black sheet, the lights dimmed out.]

12 replies 11 reposts 328 likes

—

ric3stappen

place your bets on who the DAUD will be this year. i’m thinking alternate fernando finally found a way to bribe the FIA and we’ll finally get some like weird twin driver thing this year

#truly it’s what we deserve #what’s the point of using the DAUD program if you aren’t going to have any fun with it 

392 notes

jeanie 🤠 COTADANIEL ·17 Feb

the funniest option ever would be another daniel being the DAUD

12 replies 19 reposts 282 likes

jeanie 🤠 COTADANIEL · 17 Feb

Replying to COTADANIEL

i say funny but i honestly might just start crying like i’m still not doing emotionally well

4 replies 0 reposts 98 likes

F175 Live at The 02 — 2025 F1 Season Launch

532K watching Started 55 min ago #F1…more

F1 10.8M

[00:55:33]

A lift below the stage rises to reveal the Racing Bull’s car, Yuki Tsunoda and Isack Hadjar. The car slides forward, as both drivers walk around waving at the crowd. The lift rises again to Benjamin walking out.

—

maxielupdates

am i hallucinating 

38 notes

tris ☘️ THREETHREETHREE · 17 Feb

I’M SO SORRY DID YOU SAY RICCIARDO ?!

8 replies 58 reposts 283 likes

bigriccenergy

like daniel ricciardo… that ricciardo… what the fuck

#what in the DANIEL CURSE IS HAPPENING

128 notes

jeanie 🤠 COTADANIEL · 17 Feb

i have started crying for those keeping track i did mean it when i said i am emotionally unwell

2 replies 0 reposts 12 likes

—

[Photo: Benjamin standing in front of the car, with his arms crossed. 36 is his driver’s number.]

Liked by maxverstappen1 and others

visacashapprb You did hear that right, introducing the DAUD for the 2025 season is none other than Benjamin Ricciardo 👏

Read more at the 🔗in our bio.

View all 12,382 comments

matthewevca As in Daniel Ricciardo’s son or ??????????

23 February

—

jake 381racers · 23 Feb

So I guess this technically means that Max has driven against a Ricciardo in every single year of his F1 career so far still

5 replies 1 reposts 192 likes 

kadey danyellricciardo · 23 Feb

Replying to 381racers

i love that this is your first thought 

1 replies 0 reposts 21 likes

jake 381racers · 23 Feb

Replying to danyellricciardo

It has to be otherwise suddenly I’m at Milton Keynes and Faenza with lighter fluid and matches

0 replies 9 reposts 59 likes

verstappenricciardo

do you think that benjamin tried to go back to his universe after finding out what red bull did to daniel here or

#that or he's going to crash the car at every possible point to really fuck with the costcap and i would support him#wait i just had an awful thought what if his daniel also went through what we went through NOOOOOO #guys i have to believe that one universe out there is just beautiful and we got what we wanted again so delete that thought

842 notes

—

danielricciardo 36m

[Photo: Daniel and Benjamin sitting next to each other, attempting to mirror each other.

Text reads: Seeing (almost) double 👨👨]

—

tris ☘️ THREETHREETHREE · 24 Feb

literally fell out my chair seeing that IG story like how does one process this

3 replies 7 reposts 48 likes

—

F1TV: 2025 PRE SEASON TESTING DAY 1

Will BUXTON: Now is probably a good time as ever to talk about the Australian sized elephant sitting in the Racing Bulls garage, this year’s Designated Alternate Universe Driver is Benjamin Ricciardo. Some of you at home might be new to the sport, you might have heard of Ricciardo before, but Laura just talk us through the significance of the DAUD program and Benjamin Ricciardo being in the Racing Bulls.

Laura WINTER: Absolutely, so for those new to the sport, welcome, we’re glad to have you. Every year the sport welcomes a driver from another universe, otherwise known as the DAUD, they arrive for pre-season testing and complete the first race of the season before going back to their universe. The DAUD program was introduced as a way for teams to potentially become more competitive depending on where their DAUD came from, and it’s just a really interesting way to challenge teams up and down the grid. Teams work on a rotation depending on the last number of the year, so since it is 2025, Racing Bulls have the pleasure of hosting the DAUD who ended up being Benjamin Ricciardo.

BUXTON: It’s not a coincidence if you are recognising the Ricciardo name, he is related to Daniel Ricciardo, he is in fact Daniel’s son. But not the Daniel that we currently know, the whole alternate universe can start to confuse people.

WINTER: I find that if you try and not to think about it then it actually makes more sense. But obviously the timing of everything given the past season with Daniel leaving Racing Bulls midway through the season for Liam Lawson, who now has Daniel’s kid as his teammate for one race is probably not what anyone expected coming into the season. 

BUXTON: I have to assume that it’s probably a little bit awkward in that garage, for everyone involved. I’ve been told that Daniel is not in Bahrain to watch Benjamin, but we’ll see whether he shows up in Melbourne. It is his home race, for both Benjamin and Daniel.

WINTER: We’re in early stages of testing, so I’m interested to see how Benjamin will fare. He does also have that time difference to fare with, I believe he also did travel back twenty years as well as hopping universes, so I can only assume Daniel gave him a bunch of tips on how to drive the car. 

—

ric3stappen 

me clocking in to watch all three days of testing even though i vowed to never give a single fuck about the sport ever again 

#you put daniel’s son in front of me and you tell me you’re also not watching him every time he races… c’mon

verstappenricciardo

omg they gave benjamin pierre hamelin maybe all is right with the world

#i would put money that pierre LEPT at the opportunity #every race last year with lawson he sounded done you know he misses daniel 

bigriccenergy 

please tell me you guys saw that video of max watching benjamin in the garage GOD MY HEART

#and why is he filming?? omg is he filming for daniel #im gonna go lay down

jake 381racers 

why max verstappen jet in perth? max verstappen in perth? why max verstappen jet not in melbourne? max verstappen visiting daniel ricciardo? 

deuxmoi 3hr

[Sent via form submission from Deuxmoi

Pseudonyms, Please: Thrice is Nice

Email: thriceisnice@/gmail.com

Subject: Third wheeling

Message: Max Verstappen seen at Perth arrivals airport this morning (around 3:30am). Was with Benjamin as well, Daniel and his mum picked them up from arrivals hall—the two former teammates looking veryyyyyy cosy. Almost too cosy. Make of that what you will.

Text overlayed: For my F1 enjoyers 👀]

—

maxielupdates 

look deuxmoi is like the gossips of all gossips, BUT we do know max is in perth. so. make of that what you will. 

#subject line being third wheeling…so interesting

tris

hold on… max is in perth… with benjamin… and daniel … and his family… there’s something there but i’ll be shot into the sun if i say it 

ric3stappen 

ASK: have you seen this: tumblr maxielupdates post

my favourite sentence is the too cozy one because for normal people i assume it just means like a long hug but for these two social norms have and will always continue to be broken so i just assume they were like holding a staring contest in the middle of the terminal or something idk

#i can imagine them just 👁️👁️ across the terminal and people around them being like wtf 

20 notes

—

F1 Press Conference

Drivers: Max VERSTAPPEN (Red Bull), Benjamin RICCIARDO (Racing Bulls), Oscar PIASTRI (McLaren) 

Q: Benjamin, seeing as you’re new to the grid for this race, we’ll start with you. It must feel exciting coming into this as our DAUD for the 2025 season, just talk us through how this past month has been for you?

Benjamin RICCIARDO: It’s definitely been hectic, like the second I stepped out it was such an immediate change than what I’m used to, even just being twenty or so years back than the time period I’m used to, let alone being in a completely different universe, but it’s been cool. You know how parents are always like “back in my day…” type of things and we would be like “yeah whatever” as a kid, but I actually now get to experience it, which is crazy. Obviously things aren’t you know a one for one recreation of my parents lives, but it’s pretty similar.

Q: Speaking of your parents, it would be remiss not to bring them up. How do you feel coming into the DAUD program being related to Daniel?

BR: There are like four people in this room who are ready to throw water at me if I say too much, but the DAUDs being related to F1 drivers isn’t exactly a new concept. I think you guys had one of Lewis’ or Rosberg’s kids a couple years back—I don’t exactly remember—but I think it’s probably just… let’s say the timing of everything that’s probably assisted in it being a bigger deal than it needs to be. 

Q: You mention the timing of everything, there must be some awkwardness within the team given who you are and what happened to Daniel in the previous season?

BR: I feel like a lot of people forget that all the DAUDs are crosschecked so that we don’t exist in this current universe. Like, it can be weird to think about, but Daniel here obviously didn’t have a baby last year, so there’s no physical way that I could exist here. So yes, whilst technically he is my dad, he’s not. Daniel here is like my bonus dad, in a weird alternate universe–twin way. I’m obviously aware of what happened here, but I can’t really speak too much about what unfortunately happened between Daniel here and the team. I think it’s pretty ******* stupid what happened, but you know, hopefully I’ll be able to make him proud with what I’ll do here. Honestly, I just came here to race. I didn’t realise there would be so many questions!

Max VERSTAPPEN: I think in this universe you are holding the wrong names and passport! 

BR: You know that the other ones would cause even more questions.

Q: What do you mean by that Benjamin?

BR: I would love to tell you, but unless the memory wiping machines from Men In Black suddenly existed, I’m contractually obligated to say absolutely nothing. Maybe you’ll find out in like thirty three years, who knows. Is that when the statute of limitations are up?

—

kadey danyellricciardo · 

now i know why they haven’t let benjamin do any press until his race, he’s like three seconds away from saying FUCK THOSE NDAs 😭

ric3stappen

i have questions. so many questions. but apparently i won’t find out until 2058. 

#such a specific number benjamin… what do you know #max… what do you know

tris THREETHREETHREE

literally rotating between i want benjamin to score points but also not wanting him to score points because i want that team to fucking burn to the ground

maxielupdates

Full post race radio between Benjamin and Pierre: 

That is P10, P10 Benjamin. Excellent, excellent, excellent. Some very good driving, especially at the end with the attacking. You should be very pleased with yourself. 

That was fun! I scared myself at the end with the dive down, but we made it stick so that’s all that matters. Probably scared you guys as well!

You have been wonderful to work with over pre-season testing and this race weekend, your feedback has always been so concise and clear, and I speak for everyone in the garage that you are clearly a very talented driver, we wish you all the best for whatever comes when you go back home. And I was about to say that you got another point for fastest lap, but no we do not do that now. But still, one point is very good!

Thank you, you’ve been great to work with Pierre and everyone in the garage. I'll print this radio message out and get you guys to sign it when I go back home as my references, haha. I’m happy to leave the fastest lap award for Daniel, I think that one will always be his. Where did Max finish?

Max finished in P1, managed to pass Oscar on the last lap. Enjoy the final cool down lap Benjamin, and P0 when you pull into the pitlane and switch off the car.

Copy. Thank you guys. 

#pierre now misses not one but two ricciardos… free my guy #i love benjamin he just says whatever without a care in the world like how do you know about the ricciardo rule 

219 notes

jake 

What happens if we just didn’t send Ben back. Just kept him for the rest of the season. Then what. 

bigriccenergy

ALEXA PLAY SILVER SPRINGS BECAUSE BOY WILL TIME CASTS A SPELL BUT YOU WON’T FORGET ME I KNOW I COULD HAVE LOVED YOU BUT YOU WOULD NOT LET ME AND I’LL FOLLOW YOU DOWN TIL THE SOUND OF MY VOICE WILL HAUNT YOU GUYS YOU’LL NEVER GET AWAY FROM THE SOUND OF THE WOMAN THAT LOVES YOU (AND YES YOU WERE A FOOL)

#you can kill him. but maybe the universe will work in mysterious ways and send his son to humble you. #and that is hashtag love and light folks. #you can reshape the narrative how ever you want but the truth will persist and i think that is beautiful #you’ll never get away baby never get away 😝

281 notes

—

ric3stappen

okay now that i presume benjamin is long gone back to his own universe i can finally say it: do you guys think that benjamin isn’t just a ricciardo…. he’s a ricciardo-verstappen… because to me he honestly looks more like max than he does daniel… i can not be the only one who sees this

#like i’m not kidding go look at photos from australia where it’s three of them and pull your focus to look past the hair and the nose #i can’t be the only one seriously 

3,633 notes

[wyervan]

hiiii just wanna start off by saying I love your art style and general vibes ✨️ I'm a stay-at-home partner always in search of fun things to do, and I've recently gotten back into art after not engaging with it since I was a kid (largely because your sun n moon fixation rubbed off on me 😭). I've never tried digital art and it looks cool! Do you have any advice for a beginner like me?

Oh it makes me so happy when people say I inspired them to start creating again 😭 The DCA and the fandom brought me out of my own years-long artistic funk last spring. Clown power, yeehonk 🤠 🤡

I’m planning a significantly longer post in response to an ask I got ages ago all how I learned to draw the way I do, so lookout for that.

But in the meantime, here’s a couple things I can think of off the top of my head:

Specific tools don’t matter much. I currently use Procreate and would recommend it if you have an IPad. It’s an extremely simple but effective program.

On desktop, I use Clip Studio Pro, but Krita is another program I’ve used and liked AND it’s completely free.

I do also have loads of experience with Photoshop and other Adobe products but can’t recommend them at the price, not to mention they’re not super beginner friendly.

Hardware-wise, I almost exclusively use my IPad to draw because it’s so portable. I also have a Huion Kamvas pen tablet monitor that hooks up to my desktop. But I started doing digital art with a dinky lil Wacom tablet that was less than $100. There’s definitely a bit of a disconnect at first, not looking at where you’re drawing but rather on a screen, but you get used to it.

Bottom line is to use whatever tools are convenient and comfortable for you! I even know of a great artist that exclusively draws with their mouse. I realized I hated sitting at a desk and that stopped me from practicing digitally. I got an IPad and now it’s much easier for me to work comfortably on what I love.

Point two I’d like to make is take advantage of the capabilities of working digitally. This means using the godsent undo button to your heart’s content. Download fun brushes to play with and add texture. Use perspective grids. Turn on line stabilization so your strokes are extra smooth. Like what you’ve sketched so far but want to try something different? Duplicate the layer and work from there so you can go back to the old version if you change your mind. Radically change the colors or values with adjustment layers. Use clipping masks. Abuse the liquify tool.

A lot of this might sound like gobbledygook to a digital art beginner but just googling any of this terminology will get you loads of tutorials and information for your specific setup. Also I’m happy to go into details about specific digital art techniques I’ve picked up with over a decade and a half of experience.

Finally, and most importantly—make what you want to see in the world AND what feels good to make. This ofc is not exclusive to digital art, but I always want to stress this to new artists. I realized after I got into the DCA fandom that I had been letting shame, fear, and perfectionism keep me from creating the content I was really interested in making. But then man, idk. Frickin’ robot clowns amirite ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ it’s like there was a secret agent sent into my brain and he uploaded a DCA virus into my mainframe or smth idk hacker style. tktktktkt. they’re in.

Anyway. Hope this helps! Feel free to send another message if u have more questions :3

[alllinesarebeautiful]

Day 401 art meditation, June 9, 2024

I’m dumping LOVE into the world! That’s what this is, and the world needs more love.

Also with this Day 401 video, I am trying to Speak the way I Write. This is a huge detail about overcoming trauma, even if it’s a little trauma, I trust myself MORE when I write and can edit what I say. This could give us more empathy for people who have survived huge traumas, and how hard it is to function from the heart. Every little piece of trauma makes it that much easier for our egos to kick in, and our heart-spaces to come forth. Add in all the generational trauma.

I know that I’m still not speaking the way I write, but I’m giving myself GRACE. 

1 of 3 video

Good morning! I’m forcing myself to speak and be public, things that I hate doing, and I’m believing in this personal growth journey.

I loaded more bags onto my store, so please check them out! annehunsicker.com

I started my July 1st Art drop, and there is much less resistance this time -  I’m very happy about that, although there is still resistance. 

I also started seriously learning Adobe After Effects, and I’m LOVING it. I’m just loving Adobe, (like I always have since my mid 20’s). 

2 of 3 video

Which makes me think … Do what you love! I love Adobe, I’ve always loved Adobe programs, they are both smart and intuitive combined, why not learn a new program and see if I can get my art to do what I want in my next Art video. It may not work!

I also love that the little tools / icons in Adobe are absolutely tiny, and it reminds me of knitting, which is something I have done a lot in my life, and I love that connection - making something one stitch at a time and growing it …

3 of 3 video

The third thing I wanted to say (is this the 3rd?) - Just do everything that you love! I think it’s so important not to put ourselves in boxes. I don’t want to just do one thing - sell bags -, I want to follow all the little leads from my heart, everything that I love to do, follow it all routinely, every day a little bit. Build that final sweater in all the things you love.

xxooxxooAnne ◉◎⦿◎◉

[deadboyfriendd]

For the ask game: edelweiss, papyrus, cactus and sage

Edelweiss: how'd you think of your url/ username? what's it associated with to you?

All of the men I love are dead lol. NO but I was originally a strictly Eddie writer. I wanted something reminiscent of my edgy tumblr days for my return to the app and sequincowgrrrl wasn’t doing it for me anymore. Eddie was my original dead boyfriend but I don’t think I’m emotionally prepared if Steve is my next is S5.

Papyrus: if you put your 'on repeat' playlist on shuffle, what's the first song that comes up? what do you like about it / associate it with?

After the Glitter Fades by Stevie Nicks.

I mean, what is there to NOT like about Stevie Nicks? The chorus in this song hits like a ton of bricks. This is my, “drive home dissociating and white knuckling the steering wheel” song. This is my, “can’t tell the difference between tears and water drops in the shower” song. This is a screaming song.

Cactus: something you’re currently learning (about)?

Adobe software! I’m a graphic design major and I’m currently learning how to work After Effects. Plot twist: it SUCKS and I HATE IT.

As far as personal enrichment I’m learning about the events that transpired on the Texas-Mexico border in the 1850s. My current read is Blood Meridian by Cormac McCarthy and I can’t recommend it enough. His prose is lethal.

Sage: what 'medium' of art (poetry, music, fiction, paintings, statues etc.) is the most touching to you? why do you think that is?

As an artist and a writer myself, I would like to be partial to my own mediums, but I’ve been touched by lots of pieces. Personally anything that has a whole heart and soul out in the open for everyone to see deserves praise because that shit is hard. Music gets me the most frequently because it’s the most easily accessible art for me to consume, but writing and poetry are the ones that cut me the deepest.

Thanks for the asks, nonnie! Until next time 🤍

[ic3qu33n]

“What is your parents story?” Part.1 “my dad”

Well these are going to be hard to type out. Me being on the healing journey that I am in, I know why my parents were/are the way they are. I can see their inner self screaming for help and no one ever came. It makes me sad actually. I think my childhood could have gone very differently if they had the information that I have learned about abuse in all forms. How it affects us all mentally, emotionally and physically. I think if they had received any of this information life would have been very different for both of them.

First we’ll start with my dad. He passed away in 2014 from complications of Hep C and liver disease. He was 56. He was born in Agua Prieta, Sonora Mexico. A small town on the other side of the border near Douglas Arizona. As the story goes from many different family members, my dad’s biological father had two families. One on each side of that border. When my “grandfather” decided he no longer wanted my grandmother and went back to his “real family”, my grandmother tried to drown my father in the river. It was my grandmothers sister, his tia Esperanza, who saved him. Her name actually means “hope” in english… there something beautiful about that. Anyway, he was only 3 days old. His aunt had just had a baby who was about a month older than him, so she breast fed both babies. My dad told me once when he was drunk that he never understood how his mother could hate him so much. He grew up in a house across the way from where she lived. She continued to have children with a new man she married. He told me how his aunt never lied to him. He always knew what his mother tried to do with him. But as he put it, his little heart still tried to win his mother’s affection. He told me how he would sell candy and gum at the border when he was 6 and bring the money to his mother, not his aunt. She would take the money and send him on his way. He said he even took an old banana crate and reconstructed it to be a shoe shining box that he could carry to the border and shine shoes for American pennies. And every time, he would give her the money. Still she rejected him. He told me, that when he looks at us, he can’t comprehend how she could treat him that way when he couldn’t imagine doing that to us. (Though he was unavailable to us, but thats a story for another day). Then one day his tia Esperanza was going to Arizona to visit friends and decided my father should meet his father. My dad told me that he stood in the drive way of a beautiful white adobe house. There was red brick outlining the windows and door frame. He said compared to what he grew up in, this house looked well cared for. He said he waited in the driveway until his tia returned with his father. He told me this well dressed man with black shiny shoes towered over him. He told me he kept his head down and couldn’t stop staring at his shoes. Then the man got down on one knee and called him “Danny”. My dad had only ever been called “Daniel” by everyone he knew. He liked the way “Danny” sounded. (This is how my dad chose to introduce himself til the day he died) This man that my dad knew as a stranger told my dad that he and his older sister that he shared with my grandmother were both his children. Something my dad never knew. He thought all of his siblings had different fathers. He told my dad he wishes he could keep him and his sister with him but he couldn’t because his wife refused to accept them. He told my dad that he was sorry but maybe when he was older he could come visit. He just could never stay. My dad said he didn’t know why the words from a stranger hurt so bad. He said “I didn’t know this motherfucker until that day, why do I care?” But I knew. My father didn’t have to explain that this little boy was feeling rejected yet again.

We will fast forward to when my dad turns 16. This is when he leaves Mexico for good. He hops on a train and gets off in Tucson, Arizona. There he goes to another aunts house. His mothers younger sister Blanca. This is when my dad meets the first real father figure, his aunts husband, his tio Jose. Everything my dad knows about working with your hands and “being a man”, comes from this man. Around this time my dad learns that his biological father sent him legal documents and paperwork claiming him as his child. My dad had a permanent residence card allowing him to live in the U.S. he even had a social security card, and baptismal records from a church in Tucson. Turns out his tia Esperanza had been crossing the border with my dad and his sister many times just so his father could see his son grow, and claim both his children. My dad said that was the first time he felt someone did something for him that he didn’t have to beg for.

The next few years my dad does odd jobs, even lives in Portland, Oregon when he was 18 with one of his cousins. He eventually comes home to Arizona where he meets my mom at the age of 19.

One day he is at a bar with his cousin who ends up getting in a fight. Now my dad likes to tell it like, unbeknownst to my dad, a boxing trainer is “watching how quick” my dad moved and how my dads “eyes darted from one person to the next as he swung his punches”. This man supposedly approached my dad as they were getting in a vehicle to leave. This man gives my dad a paper bag with an address to the gym he trains at. He tells my dad if he wants to “get out of bars and into a ring to come and see him”. So my dad becomes a boxer for a short period. Then soon after, my mom and dad get married and when she tells him she is pregnant with my older brother he quits fighting. He the goes to find a “real job” to be a “good” father and husband to his new family.

I wish I could say it was all happy ever after from this point on… but its not. Again, a story for me to tell another day. Anyway I will stop this here. Next post will be about my mom. In the mean time, here is a face to the man I call dad. Meet Danny

[ncutii-gatwa]

i hate adobe and i hate photoshop and i hate capitalism and i hate corporate greed 😭 i am grateful for all freeware out there but unfortunately, it's usually got much worse UX and cannot really do it all. would not give up my linux and gimp for anything but damn, you really gotta have a lotta money for all the other fancy stuff rip 💀

yeah you really do and it sucks SO much. i love creating and i love editing but seeing all the stuff you need to do it and how much it all costs together really gets me down honestly. people who can get stuff for free and just create to their hearts content are so lucky they have no idea

[bunniberry]

i hate adobe products with all my heart

playing the game of "is my chest tight from the coffee i had or is it stress about being behind on assignments"

[bearjam]

I’m finally done. This is as good as it will get since I lost a work day. I enjoy the card. (Front. Inside. Back)

[deacf-coffee-is-a-sin]

Not me pumping out a 2 week project in 2 days and killing my wrist in the process (click for better image)

[feely-touchy]

It is so good to be fat

It is good to be mapped by wrinkles

It is right that our eye bags carry yesterday's excitements

Why not?

Because Bacchus is myth?

Because of the tax on the thighs for the second on the lips?

My lips have kissed such thighs despite my tired eyes

I've traced crooks of smiles both taut and wry

And I have been kissed back

While fat

And it was so good

I could call the moment acceptance

Total absolution

In which humanity once more rejoined heaven

Rejoicing in voices we saved only for each other

Having been gifted bodies so resilient

That they change shape

Slowly into things we'd dare not hate

I think that I have learned to say it is good to be fat

For I have cooked for my love a thousand dishes

Tasting each a thousand times

Thinking, "If only they'd love a single bite"

And they love it as they love the process

As painters learn to like the mess

So I give of them my efforts in hours and days

Chipping away

Until my hands crack and start to break

Chiseling into my body their very own secret place

Knowing love has made my heart a cave

Where I would carve my soul adobe

Giving my everything

Since they're all I need anyway

But when the time comes to share,

I think, "It's so good to be fat"

[catsnuggler]

I love the desert now. I still yearn more for the green woods and green grass, and I think I always will. Even so, I finally love the desert. What I hate is living in the desert in a society where we refuse to actually adapt to the desert in an ecologically-sensible, minimally-wasteful, sustainable, and equitable way. Instead of housing everyone in adobe/cob houses, those who can afford it are housed in plywood houses or apartments, with expensive, energy-intensive heating and air units, and those who can't afford this live on the streets, at the mercy (or lack thereof) of the elements. Instead of guaranteeing a cold, clean river for all the salmon people - those who eat the salmon, as well as those who are the salmon - we dam the rivers, put nuclear power plants on the rivers, allow agricultural runoff into the rivers...

I am angry at this. I am existentially angry at this. I am angry, because I know, deep down in my heart, that things can be better, that there is hope, that we could have justice and peace and plenty and equality here - but we don't, because powerful people depend on the little people fighting each other and suffering so that the powerful can keep reaping in profits.

This may not rightfully be my home, but I live here, and I want things to be set right for whoever does get to live here. As long as I'm here, I want to help fight for that.

[rookie-critic]

Fear (2023, dir. Deon Taylor) - review by Rookie-Critic

Sometimes you see a trailer for something, and you know that, most likely, it's not gonna be good. I hate to say it, and I try not to judge any particular book by its cover, but we all do it, we can't help it. It's almost impossible not to put a perception on something. I know I shouldn't, because it's happened so many times just in the past couple years where I was anticipating something being bad or just ok, and it ended up blowing my socks off. It's almost gotten to a point where I'm more inclined to go see something if I have a negative knee-jerk reaction to it. Still, sometimes that inclination is right, and it most definitely was in the case of Fear.

This film, that clearly only got a theatrical release because its only release competition was Brandon Cronenberg's Infinity Pool, a very niche psychological thriller, and the star-studded, but massively undermarketed rom-com Maybe I Do. I could talk about how the film is edited in way that seems like they ran out of production time/budget and didn't have enough footage to make a cohesive plot, I could talk about the rushed digital effects that look like they were made in just shy of two weeks by college freshman in Adobe After Effects, I could talk about the ADR that was clearly added in with complete disregard for whether or not a character that is supposed to be speaking on screen's mouth is even moving, or the absurd amount of re-used dialogue. I could talk about a million different little technical things I noticed while watching this movie, but really I think the most crushing thing for Fear is that it is a horror movie, one that desperately wants to be taken seriously, that just flat out isn't scary. The premise, that your deepest fears manifest themselves in reality at the lodge where the film take place, and that's what eventually kills you, while interesting from a baseline perspective, seems to be of mostly tangential interest to the filmmakers. [MILD SPOILERS AHEAD] They have a sliver of a unique idea in giving some of the ensemble more abstract fears (stuff like "my friends not being able to trust me" or "not being in control"), but its almost like they just get bored after taking those concepts three-quarters of the way to their conclusions and just kill those characters off through some half-hearted, supernatural other thing than actually having their fears kill them. Even the character whose fear is literally just blood has a completely unrelated death. He doesn't drown in blood (his significant other in the film's biggest fear was drowning, they could have easily knocked out two birds with one stone there), he doesn't even bleed out (even though he does get stabbed and one of the hallucinations he has is his stab wound bleeding profusely), none of that vastly more on-theme stuff happens. His neck gets snapped. That's it.

It's just unbelievably underwhelming on almost every front. It's a horror movie with no horror, a slasher film with unoriginal, uninteresting death scenes, it packs no punch, offers no lasting impact, and the acting isn't even bad enough to be funny. In fact, a couple of the performances borderline on good (Andrew Bachelor, a.k.a. King Bach, whose production company helped make this film, actually delivers a decent performance, and TI has at least one decently funny moment). I think the only thing I've seen recently that was worse was Jeepers Creepers: Reborn, but I can barely even call that a film, so that was a pretty low bar to pass. Please, if you were thinking about seeing this, don't. Save your money and your time, it's not worth it.

Score: 2/10

Only in theaters.

[isotridecanol]

I hate the whole adobe creative suite with all of my heart but After Effects takes the cake as the absolute worst productive program in human history. AE has never functioned as intended on any computer.