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cakesexuality · 3 months ago

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by unpopular demand, I'm back! We're throwing a giant costume ball in a fancy castle for Halloween. The grander the better. There's no budget constrictions to take into account, the world's your oyster, tell me, what would you go dressed as? How would it look? Does the party have a theme? If you were to host it what'd be the vibe? Where are you usually found at in parties? 😊

Oooh another Glitter Ask Sunday Monday

Using a cut because this got long and I even used pictures to illustrate some of my points

A costume I've wanted to do for a long time is inspired by a photo I once saw on Pinterest where two people were dressed as Spyro and Cynder from the Spyro games, so they had the horns and wings and everything, except they were in prom dresses as well, and I've been wanting to do one like that as Spyro, except in a more casual dress, or, like, as a girl from the 90s, since that's when the Spyro games first came out

The account that I pulled this image from is Breanne Messner, but I don't know if that's one of the people in the photo

I have more Halloween decorations than places to put them, so I would bust out all my decorations and then buy more, so long as the castle has room! I have big light-up spiders with bendy legs, a tinsel spider who I call "Disco Spider" and she hangs from the ceiling, a big haunted house candle holder, a metal bucket candle holder with a cat's face cut out of the side, a ceramic jack-o-lantern candle holder, a string of small paper lanterns with jack-o-lantern faces on them, a sign that sticks into the ground that says "Trick or Treat" with a purple owl on it, a trick-or-treating basket shaped like a cat's head with glow-in-the-dark eyes that I keep on the table and it always has candy for everyone to take, string lights of spiders and their webs dangling, a bunting that's actually a bunch of bloody murder weapons... and there's probably more that I'm forgetting. I could carve a bunch of pumpkins and set them around the whole place -- I don't typically do this because we live in a very small town in the middle of nowhere and don't feel like attracting trick-or-treaters with outdoor decorations because we wouldn't get many, if at all.

Don't worry! This is an electric candle so I'm not heating up the shelf above the candle holder

The closest I've ever come to having a themed Halloween party where the theme wasn't just "Halloween" was in 2015 when I hosted Halloween high tea. (One of the guests tried to correct me and tell me it wasn't high tea, as if I hadn't just been to an English tea room a few months prior where my England Mum called it high tea.) If I'm remembering correctly, I had whipped out the owl-shaped teapot my England family gifted to me. I made cupcakes that looked like zombie heads with the brains exposed, little cucumber sandwiches like what I had in England at the tea room, and I think scones or American-style biscuits? (There is a difference between scones and American biscuits and I will die on this hill)

My England Mum bought this behind my back at the same time I was buying her rabbit socks behind her back

If there was a theme at the castle party, it might be zombies? Just because one of my favourite shows is about zombieism as a chronic illness and one of my favourite video games is about mushroom zombies. If I went with this theme, then I would skip on the Spyro costume and go with being a zombie, though I would have to decide if I wanted to have partially deceased syndrome (an excuse to break out the white contacts) or cordyceps brain infection (a chance to learn some new makeup skills).

Me in cosplay as Kieren Walker

At the castle party, I would probably be setting up the TV for people to watch a show like In The Flesh or Courage the Cowardly Dog, watch a movie like Halloweentown (I don't have a video link for Halloweentown specifically but I do have one for DCOMs in general) or Silent Hill, or to play a video game from my collection like Resident Evil 4: Wii Edition or Silent Hill 4: The Room -- since it's a big castle, there's probably enough space for three TVs and we could have a TV room, a movie room, and a video game room. I would probably have a device somewhere with music playing, some Halloweeny songs such as Sally's Song by Amy Lee (or the original version by Catherine O'Hara) or Howl by Florence + The Machine and some year-round bops such as Planetary (GO!) by My Chemical Romance or Celebrity Status by Marianas Trench. (These examples are based on what my friends and I would listen to at parties in high school.) Sometimes at parties, I organise non-video games, like the time I had a Doctor Who-themed birthday party so we played Doctor Who Risk in the basement, or the time I helped host a Halloween party near a big park with a bunch of trees so we played "live-action Slender" as we called it (a game of tag where one person is "it" and the other players have to collect as many pages as possible before being eliminated by the one who's "it" or before the timer goes off).

A sampling of some games I have that might be appropriate for Halloween -- yes, these are all single-player, but it's sometimes just as fun to watch your friend play a game as it is to play it yourself

A few years ago, I discovered how much I like making nerdy/themed cocktails, so I would probably also be making Halloween drinks for anyone who wants them. Not sure what Halloween or horror cocktail recipes I have (aside from Camp Crystal Lake, which is gross because the Rumchata curdles when it mixes with the other ingredients) but we can probably come up with something! Perhaps boozy hot chocolates or some kind of drink with raspberry Sourpuss. Of course, I would have non-alcoholic drinks, too! Maybe I'll put on coffee and offer my pumpkin spice creamer, have some non-boozy hot chocolates available, and/or make something with grenadine.

The cocktail I got at the Halloween drag show on Friday along with my last five for tipping the artists

For food, I would probably offer pizza, cupcakes, candy, pie, and more!

A picture I recently took for Instagram of my turkey Ulana getting herself a slice of pumpkin pie

And of course, I would send everyone home with a goody bag or goody box! One of the parties I hosted in high school had goody boxes shaped like haunted houses and contained such things as bouncy balls that look like eyes and jelly beans in the Halloween colours

No picture to go with this one 🤷‍♀️ I was gonna put the goody boxes I made my best friends this year, but they both follow me here and I don't want to spoil it for them 🤫

#alcohol /#eye horror /#i discovered while making this post that my copy of resi 7 is missing #im gonna scream #i was already missing the ps4 version of sotc #i ate up most of my phone battery making this answer lol

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waldensblog · 1 year ago

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Saw Ballad on the 17th. Detailed thoughts below the cut

So, I absolutely loved the movie, and I am very very excited to see all the amazing edits that people are going to make!

I love that we got to see a little bit of the Dark Days with the opening scene, the true fragility of the Capitol system that Snow hinted at in Catching Fire.

When they introduce Highbottom, I noticed they had a founder of Panem memorial in the background with the name "Trajan Heavensbee" on it. Knowing that a lot of the names are specific nods to Ancient figures, I had to google it, and lo and behold: the Roman empire reached its largest geographical extent under Emperor Trajan. Perhaps it was Trajan Heavensbee, as founder of Panem, who ultimately subjugated the districts to create Panem? I love this little detail.

I will never not be obsessed with the tragic relationship between Sejanus and Coryo, and I loved the depiction in the film. Coryo initially says they aren't friends, that he only tolerates him, but then when Snow is sitting alone at lunch, it's only Sejanus who sits with him. Coryo tells himself throughout the film that he doesn't care, only to break down when he realizes he's killed the only true friend he ever had. Sejanus deserved so much better, and the jabberjay's echoing his last words is an absolutely haunting scene.

On that note, I am so sad they didn't include more of the Plinths in the film. Strabo and Coryo never talked, we never got to see the absolutely disgusting way he visits them at the end and becomes basically their heir/adoptive son because of how he was a "good friend" to Sejanus. I so wish they included this in the movie, but I assume that he was on his way to the Plinths in the last scene when he stares at the statue.

Of course, I loved Lucy Gray. She was a gentle and good soul, but she knew how to survive as well. She was able to perform for the cameras, but she was real with Coryo. I love how they gave her the accent this time!!! I loved her singing and staring in defiance of the cameras as the snakes crawl up her arm, and later in 12 she's wearing a snake bangle. Obviously, her and Coryo's relationship falls apart when she realizes he killed Sejanus (and therefore, could easily kill her) and she can't trust him, and she flees. I'm actually really glad they kept the mystery in, where we just don't know if she survived and fled north, or if he killed her.

Tom did a great job with Coryo, and showing how he can be cold and calculating, but at the same time that he is a human being - he has emotions. Coryo chose to be evil. This is his villain origin story. Tom's acting when he cries over the photo of him and Sejanus, and when he's quietly contemplating whether to kill Lucy Gray in the forest were phenomenal. It is extremely difficult to translate Snow's inner thoughts to the screen, and I think Tom did a really good job with it.

Viola Davis, of course, did an amazing job at showing the complete psychopathy of Dr. Gaul. I don't think I need to say much more on the topic really.

I love the Retro-futuristic design choices for the technology, the architecture, etc.

Wovey, Reaper and Coral broke my hearts in the game. Wovey just wanting to go home, Reaper showing the humanity of all the tributes with his gesture, Coral begging Lucy Gray ("I can't have killed them all for nothing").

On that note I really really like how in this film we got to see District 4 being part of the ruthless careers - the first films left out that District 4 are also careers, so it was nice to see the brutality (but also humanity as I mention above) that these tributes can have.

In Sejanus and Marcus we likewise got to see that District 2 is not full of Capitol pets willing to kill at a moment's notice. Both refused to be a piece in anyone's games.

#ballad of songbirds and snakes #panemverse #bosbas spoilers #coriolanus snow #lucy gray baird #sejanus plinth

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ceph-the-ghost-writer · 2 years ago

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15 Questions: Character Edition

Tagged by @words-after-midnight! Using this for OCs as well as writers is a fun idea.

Going with everyone's favorite repentant bloodborn and fish dad, Renato (who just got some lovely new art):

(Thank you again to @/littlestpersimmon for taking the commission! I love the background and fish details especially. Go check out more of Caleb's beautiful art and his comics if you're not familiar with them already!)

1. Are you named after anyone? My given name came from my Portuguese great grandmother on the Dimas side of the family, my father's side. I chose "Renato" as a teenager because the meaning (reborn) applied to both my transition and future as a bloodborn. Anyway, it shares the first letter and same number of syllables with the old one, so I also just liked how it sounded.

2. When was the last time you cried? I...honestly can't remember. Really. I'm not trying to sound tough or cool or anything. I must've cried when I was still a child of course, before the break. I can recall afterwards, though, watching the harbor get farther and farther away as my family fled the destruction on a ship. My eyes were completely dry. I still felt...still feel despair, anger, sadness. But after the world changed, I did too. Crying just seemed like a waste of water. It wouldn't get me anything, so my body just...didn't bother with tears.

*shifts, visibly nervous* But I think...I think I'd like to cry again someday? Is that a strange thing to say? Nevermind--forget it. Next question.

3. Do you have kids? No, but I have the next best thing. *opens wallet with photos* The goldfish is Tesoro--Tes, for short. They can roll a tiny football into a mini net. Ah, they're so talented! Then there's Beija, the pleco. She's nocturnal like me, but rather shy. And of course I can't forget the Venerable Order of Lady Guppies: Sisters Dolores, Joan, Hildegard, Leonella, Mary Celeste, Teresa, and Abbess Malfada. They're named after nuns since there aren't any male guppies in the tank and, well, you get the idea.

4. Do you use sarcasm? Occasionally, to make a point maybe. I prefer saying something outrageous with a serious face, though. I've gotten quite good at it over the years.

5. What's the first thing you notice about people? It's going to sound terrible...it is terrible, but true. I try to see if they have a weapon, and assess their vulnerable points, gauge which would be best to strike first. You know...to incapacitate. Or kill, if need be. It's ingrained into you as part of becoming an Aquila. But I'm sure you don't want to listen to such a dark subject.

6. What's your eye color? *sighs* They're blue-green, or aquamarine, or sea-green, or whatever you want to call them. I honestly don't find them that special. The way dark brown or black eyes shine is much more appealing, in my opinion.

7. Scary movies or happy endings? Hm. I'm just as likely to be annoying and complain about either one being unrealistic. I think the execution and style is what matters to me, not the category.

8. Any special talents? Winning people's trust. Being deserving of it... that's another matter. I've been told I pick up languages rather quickly, at least as far as basic conversation goes. Of course I grew up being a strong swimmer and diver.

9. Where were you born? On the Pacific, in a ship's medical bay, while my mother was accompanying my father to the States. That meant I was a default Brazilian citizen, although both my parents had dual citizenship.

10. What are your hobbies? Looking after my fish, making a nuisance of myself, finding what little pleasures I can take. I'm starting to realize just how much of my identity was tied to being an Aquila, honestly. Without that...well, I suppose I'll just have to test things out and see what sticks.

11. Have you any pets? Oh, do you want to watch all my videos of Tes and the others? [A/N: I advise you to decline. There are a lot of fish videos.]

12. What sports do you/have you played? I practice various styles of fighting and marksmanship, but that's survival rather than friendly competition. I never had a real opportunity to play any, given the world descended into chaos when I was ten. I mean, Ollie and I used to play a game where we'd dare each other to touch sharks while scavenging. Does that count?

13. How tall are you? 5'5". Many of the deadliest predators are smaller than their prey.

14. Favorite subject in school? I only attended about five years of Catholic school. My parents found me tutors for various subjects after the Break happened. I did fine with math, reading, science, all of that, but I preferred learning and honing skills. Spear fishing, sailing, foraging, those sorts of things I could use in a practical sense.

15. Dream job? *grins* Indolent concubine of a lofty noble or conquering warlord (gender neutral). Perhaps if things work out with these supposed merfolk they'll have some openings available.

Dysthanasia Taglist: @thecyrulik @thatndginger @space-writes @sunset-a-story @scoundrelwithboba

#writing tag games #dysthanasia #art commission #character art #character info

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chevvy-yates · 2 years ago

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💕 self-love time! talk about which ones of YOUR creations (edits, artworks, fanfics) you like the most then send to other creators to do the same 💕

Okay I have overlooked this one I noticed just now. I'm going to talk about my growing passion for Ryder during the last eight months.

This one was the very first I took of him back in September, 18, 2022:

When I was taking this shot, I was not satisfied with him at first. I liked his all wearing black style concept I chose for him and I knew he was going to be named 'Ryder von Scharfenberg' (his name circled around in my head ever since I defined Vijay's name) but I had a hard time getting used to him. Yes, I had a lot of doubts about him. Here a few more from that shoot:

The main reason why I was uncertain about him at first may have been when I was in the character creator I first had an overall look on mind without a beard. I wanted yellow eyes for him at first (this mod, forth pic) which I did not get to work back then — my knowledge about using mods was all new and lacking, in general adding mods for him was not easy for me (today it's peanuts). This alone made me be a already a little frustrated because I was unable to give him that color bc I was too dumb to get it working.

I intended to use some longer hair with a sidecut at first for him as well and wanted different eye make up for him trying out a mod. It was one of Anrui's Visual Kei Parlor mods (think look 4 and 5). I do love V-kei a lot and for some reason I was picturing Ryder more in a dark V-Kei style at first, which did not work out either — I got the mod working but he looked super strange to me once I made the decision of his facial parts, so I decided to look for another hair mod and found Kala's Liam hair, that made him overall look more appealing.

Yet I was still not satisfied — so, I deleted the make up mod and went for complete vanilla eyebrows and make up. Lastly I added his eye cyberware (also vanilla) and decided for a beard. Once I gave him his beard I was even more content with him (I was used to have a beard bc of Vijay having one as well). And since that eye mod didn't work either I put back in the ones I used for Vijay and decided for those white glowing circles instead.

That is how Ry came to life how he looks now. Only thing I changed for him afterward was giving him another vanilla body skin (he's the only one without unique V rig), removing the 'stickers' via Halk's Sticker Yeeter mod from his mantis arms and added his sharky teeth by Anrui and a while later some pointy nails as well.

Then I went on taking pics and he still felt super strange to me. I explain it to myself that way: Ryder is the entire opposite of Vijay. V being all cute and smiling and then suddenly there was this dark themed dude I made a German looking at me so judgingly like I do too, I couldn't really cope with.

The result were some of those pics I still do like but would do them differently today (e.g. other FOV and lights + less saturated):

The more photos I took of him, and the more I developed him via tumblr asks and talking with others about him the more he grew onto me. It got so far that he was suddenly liked more than Vijay and literally stole the show (which made me a bit sad as well bc I thought V should receive the same love as Ry did).

Next big thing I started liking him more were the Konpeki Plaza pics I took in front of the red light. This was the time I started writing out Ry's backstory. It was also the first time I made him smile — ever since then I couldn't get out that smile of my head. When I look at him sometimes he's like a total 'Lausbub' to me. About to make some prank. I can't describe it. He suddenly gave off some vibe I felt that was fitting so damn good to him even though he's that dark guy who can stare so frightening at ya with his gaze that blood could freeze in your veins.

I just wanna smooch him asdxfcgvbhj is sometimes all I can think.

At this point he must have finally persuaded me. I love him to every tiny pixel and it's gotten worse since I wrote down his first two backstory parts. Hell, it got so worse I created another char just so he has someone he can love as well because it made me sad he was so lonely for half a year. Yes, Ry was the reason I created Thyjs. I still can't believe it. Thyjs would probably never exist if Ry did not grew so much onto me. Jeeez. So if you love Thyjs: thank Ryder for existing!

Literally every shot I did with him turned out better and better. Ryder for me is the most photogenic of all my four boys. I love when he's angry and bares his teeth, I love it even more when he gives a warm smile or any other stupid face he makes. everything suits him! (with Vijay, Jaysen and Thyjs it does not work that good).

I swear every new pic I take of him, it's like he plays more and more with the camera. Like he's gotten used to someone taking pics of him at some point — some kind of a warm-up. It truly feels like when I was taking pics of someone else in a cosplay, we didn't know each other, met at the next con, I took pics again, we somehow got mutuals and ended up taking more pics, and all was suddenly easy going. That is how it is with Ry each time.

I mean, these are my latest shots of him:

The beauty that radiates out of him and the way he looks into the camera (or not) has me marveling at him. I know it is me doing his posing, chosing his expression and where he should look at. Believe me, literally 20% of my pics I take are planned. 80% of the time it is just me wanting to take pretty blorbo pics not thinking about anything. I set Ry in pose and he magically looks at me like this. All I need to do is move the camera around him, maybe adjust the direction he should look at and that's it.

okay I should stop now or it will get longer and longer, because I cann rarely shut up about him. He's everything to me. 🖤

#about: ryder von scharfenberg #I herze mein schwarzes Schaf einfach total #alway very emotional about him #don #t get me wrong I'm emotional about all my blorbos but Ryder is idk special #given the way of his creation and my doubts at first #I did not have that with Vijay #neither with Thyjs nor Jaysen #Ryder was planned loooong ago but came out totally different - a real Überraschungsei (surprise egg)

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murumokirby360 · 2 years ago

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My PC Cooling Upgrades Review - Part 2 [Second Half] (Final) (w/ my paper dolls) [Recorded on Jun 9th, 2023]

Hello, June! Here’s the continuation & final of “My PC Cooling Upgrades” Part 2 (featuring my paper dolls). 🙂

And for this "second half" of the final part, I'm installing two remaining items before I firing up my PC! But, will it work out? Then, let's find out!

If you haven't seen my "first half" of Part 2 along with my previous posts, then I'll provide some links down below. ↓

• Part 2 [First Half] [Recorded on Jun 9th, 2023]

• Part 1 [First Half] [Recorded on Jun 9th, 2023]

• Part 1 [Second Half] [Recorded on Jun 9th, 2023]

So, without further ado, let's get started:

My Recorded & Edited Video (using Filmora 9): (pls watch) ↑ 🎦✏️🖥️

• Let's continue on with my second item, the 80mm 12v CPU fan. This will released the heat from the other side of the CR-1400's radiator. Once again, please watch my 5-minute video, while I'm showing up these photos from below. ↓

8th & 9th Image(s) ↑:

• [As you've seen in the video] Here's what it looks like after installation. Sure, it may suck a little bit of heat from the radiator owing to its size, but I'm sure it'll help, though. 😉 Right, you two? They get it. 🙂

10th & 11th Image(s) ↑:

• [As you've seen in the video] For now, I only have one 4-pin slot to connect, and that is the large 120mm fan, which is roughly the same size as the fan from Jonsbo's CR-1400 cooler fan. 📏 And soon, I'll be purchasing another 120mm fan albeit a slimmer model for the upper part, as well as one special thing that I will get to that, someday. 🙂

12th to 14th Image(s) ↑:

• [As you've seen in the video] Upon testing, we've seen a bright blue light inside the PC, and that was the 80mm 12v PC Fan! 💙💡😁 If only I have a special adapter that lit the RGB light's from the new CPU Cooler fan, then it'll be awesome to see! 😃 But, can we see it in the dark? My paper dolls says "Go for it!" 😁

15th to 16th Image(s) ↑:

• [As you've seen in the video] Whoa! 😲 Now, that's what I called "LIT"! We love it! Blue lights on two angles!💙💡😁

The Aftermath:

17th to 19th Image(s) ↑:

• In the aftermath of three installing computer items, I also purchased these additional four screw bolts 🔩🖥️ (for only ₱ 5 from Shopee PH 🛒🌐🇵🇭) for my 120mm DeepCool cooling fan because one of the rubber rivets had weakened, and I hate to see my fan fell off when I remove the cover.

20th to 23rd Image(s) ↑:

⚠️ And here's my 2nd detail, so please listen to my words. ⚠️

• Unfortunately, my custom PC went short-lived, as the monitor screen went malfunctioned before the screen goes purple! Yeah, first there was a red & now purple screen, and it blacked out. I tried to do some troubleshooting, to no avail, until I found something... My current MSi Nvidia GTX 750Ti GPU Card gave out from stress & died for 6 long year lifespan. Heck, I even tried to re-apply a new thermal paste onto the graphics card, but no luck at all. And since my current CPU chip was Intel Core i3 10105F (10th gen) and doesn't support motherboard VGA port, my current PC is completely useless for the past 3 to 4 weeks! 😟😢🚫🖥️ In fact, when I tried to lift the GPU card, it went operational but malfunctioned, causing my PC un-power. Meaning I won't power on by pressing the button. I felt doomed... 😩😓

• As of now, my little bro & his friend are browsing a new / slightly used GPU card with either the same specs as the old & dead one or the RX graphics card that supports an Intel processor. So, who knows? Maybe a good one. And while my custom PC went inactive & freezing to decay, not really... I'm now using my mom's laptop as a temporary. *sigh* I just hope, that my PC had a second life when the new GPU card has arrived. 😟

Final overall:

• Overall, I have mixed feelings... At first glance, I made happy with my purchased & installed into my PC, but I went south when my PC goes haywire because of the faulty Nvidia GPU card. 😁➡😞 And FYI, the three upgraded hardware are not causing the problem, though.

• But, are my upgraded PC items worth it? Well, of course! Not only it's bright because of the 80mm PC fan, but also the new CPU Cooler fan was quite better than the default one until it went blackout. It never got a chance to go the extra mile. *sigh* 🙁😢 But hey, I'm slightly happy with the short results (I think). 🙃 If only that Nvidia GPU Card could live an extra long lifespan, then I'll make my good results for the new CPU Cooler Fan from Jonsbo, but it didn't. *sigh* 😟😞

Well, that's the end of the topic

If you want to see my previous parts of the same topic, then I'll provide these links down below. ↓ 😉

My PC Cooling Upgrades Review:

• Part 1 [First Half] [Recorded on Jun 9th, 2023]

• Part 1 [Second Half] [Recorded on Jun 9th, 2023]

• Part 2 [First Half] [Recorded on Jun 9th, 2023]

Tagged: @lordromulus90, @bryan360, @carmenramcat, @leapant, @rafacaz4lisam2k4, @paektu, @alexander1301

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whimsicallyenchantinglydreaming · 2 months ago

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Dear Liam

Today is your funeral. I still can’t believe I’m even writing that line. It still doesn’t feel real. I know I didn’t know you personally, but you and the other 4 members of one direction had a huge impact on my life. More than I could even begin to describe.

I remember it was 2012 on a school night. I was going through YouTube and the music video for what makes you beautiful was recommended. I watched it and you were the first guy to come into scene. I was immediately hooked. As I kept watching the music video I knew that this was my new pop culture obsession. When I went to school the next day I was telling all my friends about it. One Direction weren’t that well known yet at the time in my school at least. I was 13. I’d like to argue that I was the first one to know about One Direction in my school.

One Direction was something that bonded me and my two closest friends who I still talk to today. We’d watch music video premiers together and talk about the new stuff coming out. I remember as my obsession grew I watched the video diaries for hours on repeat. Off the first album the song Moments was my favourite, but I did love having dance parties in my bedroom to I Wish.

As the band got bigger my love grew more. All I thought about during my time in school was One Direction. I couldn’t wait to get home to log onto to Twitter, Tumblr, or YouTube to find new content to brighten up my days.

When I got into high school at 14, I went through a difficult time. Writing FanFiction or reading them drew me out of my realities and into fantasy worlds to take my mind off of what was going on in my world. I’d stay up till 3am some nights making YouTube edits of each of the members, including you. I made one for you to the song Mr Loverboy by Little Mix.

I defended the band to anyone who had something negative to say. I stood up for any of the members whether online or in person. I loved everyone individually. On my tough days I listened to Through the Dark. I knew you didn’t write the songs for me personally, but I always felt they were just for me. Through the band I felt like I had friends. I felt like I had support. I always had something new to look forward to, it was my whole life, and still is.

I would daydream all the time about being able to hangout with the band and being friends. In 2013 during the Take Me Home Tour, my dad surprised me with meet and greet tickets for Christmas. I don’t know how he made it possible, but he did. I remember that day so vividly. I watched you take pictures with the fans before me and couldn’t get over that fact you were all real humans in front of me.

Harry was the first person I had the chance to hug, I was so starstruck all I could say was “I love you”. Then next was Zayn and we awkwardly hugged but I got to see his sleeve of tattoos and I remember being so mesmerized. Then I stood in the small spot in between you and Zayn, took the photo and it was my turn to hug you. I remember you giving a good warm hug. I probably didn’t say anything because I was so starstruck. I do remember hugging Louis next and telling him I liked his shirt because it was a super man shirt. Which reminds me of him screaming SUPERMANNN in one of the video diaries. Then I quickly hugged Niall at the end because security was rushing me out.

I had noticed the girls in front of me only giving hugs to Harry and Zayn. I wasn’t there for just Harry and Zayn though, I was there for each member of One Direction because I loved all of you guys. All of you shaped my life and saved me. You were there in my darkest days and in my most happiest days. The guy I thought I’d marry who I ended up dating in 2016-2021 who ended up cheating on me, our first slow dance before dating each other at a dance was to You and I, and we had a little conversation where I asked him if he was a fan of 1D and I said “oh just a little” jokingly.

I still love that song to this day, even if that ex tainted it a little. It’s one of my favourites. But you see, you guys have always been there in my big moments. I always felt that you were there to guide me to safety. When the band broke up, I was sad but I knew it was all going to be okay. At the time I was in my first serious relationship and I felt that break up was handing me over to my next chapter of my life. Almost in a way of saying to me “we have been there to get you through your toughest times, now it’s your chance to fly”.

I remember when made in the a.m was released. My first time listening to it at midnight alone in my room. I cried my eyes out to If I Could Fly, and it’s always the song I listen to when I’m nervous to take off on an airplane. At the end where you all have a solo line you sing, it feels so direct to me. It felt spoken to me. It felt like a comforting send off. One Direction is the cause of 99% of my happy memories.

I still listened to One Direction even after you broke up, but it wasn’t as often. Once solo music came out I listened to that more than One Direction. I don’t like to pick favourites, but Harry is my favourite and is the member I kept up with the most. I listened to Niall’s stuff too but not as often as Harry. The odd time I’d listen to Zayn’s solo stuff, but I regret to say that I neglected you and Louis post break up.

It wasn’t a personal choice, life got busy. I fell out of my fandom phases and only focused on a few, but would be on and off with it too. I could never be the fan girl I once was with One Direction for anyone else.

I listened to your first solo album fully the other night driving to Toronto. It broke my heart that I didn’t do this sooner, and I don’t know why I never did. Now I’m making sure I equally put in the effort to keep up with all the members and not just Harry. Your management team failed you, your solo stuff is good.

I also feel bad to had never acknowledged how important you were in the dynamic of the band. You were in the forefront from the very beginning, you were the glue of the band and the fandom.

Now I’m 25 years old, I have my big girl job now and I can’t focus on my job because of the news. It’s hit me harder than I admit. I have been sad all day knowing it’s your funeral. I’ve been down since the news of your passing. I’ve never experienced any sort of grief in my life until this. You deserved so much better and I feel bad knowing I was one of the fans who neglected you. You’ve always held a special place in my heart and I regret letting the media skew my perceptions of you. I hate that I even contemplated your character. It’s so clear to me now just how much you were screaming for help.

Seeing edits of you, you look so full of life. You have the warmest and friendliest smile. You make me feel like we’ve been friends for years even though you don’t know who I am. I’m forever grateful I even had the opportunity to hug you, and now you’re gone.

Liam, you mean the world to me. I will always remember you and keep you alive in my memories and heart.

Goodbyes are bittersweet.

~ Natalie ❤️

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katherinejblackwell · 1 year ago

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Katherine's Tea Party 1- My Winter TBR

Also read on my website!

Photo by Anastasia Kostyleva

Hello and welcome to the very first blog post on my brand-new website! I'm very excited to have my own pretty little spot on the internet to talk about the things I'm most passionate about. Hopefully a few people decide to join in on the fun along the way, but for now, I'm perfectly content to be yelling into the void. So without any further delay, allow me to share some of the books I've put on my Winter TBR and why.

Number 1- The Secret History and The Goldfinch by Donna Tartt

Amidst my semi-recent foray into the dark academia aesthetic, these seem like no-brainers. I started reading The Secret History about two years ago, but final exams made it difficult for me to find the time to read it. Now that things have slowed down again, I've picked it back up from the beginning, and I'm really enjoying it. The descriptions are what I've found most interesting--even when we're reading descriptions of beauty, there's a constant creepy, haunting undertone in Tartt's words. As for The Goldfinch, I admittedly know very little about it aside from reading the blurb a few weeks ago, but I think the fact that it's by Donna Tartt and is a Pulitzer Prize winner is more than enough encouragement to add it to the list.

Number 2- The Hunger Games trilogy and The Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes by Suzanne Collins

The Hunger Games is, and I think will always be, one of my absolute favorite book series. I find myself coming back to it again and again, and I was recently re-infected with the need to read the trilogy amongst the hype surrounding the new movie coming out this month. I'm the type of person who has to read the book before watching the movie, which is why I added The Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes to the list as well. It's just come in on hold for me at the library, so it'll be briefly interrupting my reading of The Secret History. I'm very eager to dive back into one of my favorite fictional worlds, despite the mixed feelings I've seen from other Hunger Games fans regarding Songbirds and Snakes.

Number 3- Six of Crows and Crooked Kingdom by Leigh Bardugo

I picked this duology up for myself many moons ago and have yet to read it. I unintentionally took a break from fantasy for a while, but as we approach Winter, I keep imagining myself on the couch devouring fantasy novels with a warm drink by my side. So, most of the rest of this list is fantasy books. I think these two will be some of the first I pick up when snow starts hitting the ground here because I have heard nothing but good about Leigh Bardugo's books and I'm eager to finally venture into her world.

Number 4- The Red Queen series by Victoria Aveyard

I've read the first two books in this series two or three times each because I was dead set on owning a complete set of the gorgeous collector's editions of these books for the longest time. Red Queen was the very first collector's edition I bought for myself when I was in middle school and I was utterly entranced by every detail of it. I have since seen reason and (mostly) given up on the idea of the collector's editions for the final two books ever coming out, so for now, I'll be checking the next two books out from the library this Winter and crossing my fingers that one day my dream will come true.

Number 5- Set Fire to the Gods by Kristen Simmons and Sara Raasch

This is another title that I started and never finished about two or three years ago. In my defense, I started it as my second book in a 24-hour readathon, and I was absolutely delirious by the time I got to it. I'd actually read a decent chunk of the book during the readathon--I believe half or more--but I could never gather up the motivation to finish it. I could barely remember what I had read in my sleep-deprived state anyway, so eventually it seemed better to just start over altogether. This book has an absolutely gorgeous cover and a very pretty purple map on the inside, so if nothing else I'm excited to stare at it for hours.

Number 6- Iron Widow by Xiran Jay Zhao

This one I bought for myself a while back amidst the craze on Booktok, and I never got around to reading it due to my aforementioned break from fantasy. I don't remember much about the synopsis of this book, and I think I'll keep it that way so it's a bit of a surprise going in. Things are often popular for a reason, and I wouldn't have bought it if I wasn't sure at the time that I would enjoy it, so I have high hopes for it. I think I've also heard that a sequel of some sort came out recently, so if I enjoy Iron Widow maybe I'll add that to my list too.

Number 7- Legendborn by Tracy Deonn

Once again, I bought this title for myself a while ago and never got around to it during my fantasy break. The cover alone is enough to make me want to read it, but I've also heard that there is some amount of dark academia vibes in this novel, so it will absolutely be right up my alley. I am very excited to read it and I'm expecting it to be one of my favorites from this list. I think this will be a good one to read in my initial transition from Donna Tartt's novels to my fantasy picks for the season.

Number 8- The Devil and the Dark Water by Stuart Turton

Transitioning out of fantasy-land, we have a handful of mystery novels joining the fray. I was recently reminded of this book while shelving at work last week and added it to my list ASAP. I read Turton's The Seven and a Half Deaths of Evelyn Hardcastle a while ago and absolutely LOVED it. It was a creative, incredibly compelling read that I just could not put down, and if The Devil and the Dark Water is anything like Seven and a Half Deaths, sign me up a million times over.

Number 9- The Paris Apartment by Lucy Foley

I initially resisted adding The Paris Apartment to any sort of TBR, I think because I kept seeing it in emails from B&N. But I have since warmed up to it, and after reading the description of it by the book drop at work, I became intrigued enough to add it to the list. I do not often read mystery (aside from Turton's first novel), so hopefully, this will be a good book to bring me more into the genre.

Number 10- Arsenic and Adobo by Mia P. Manasala

This is another one I discovered while working at the library, and I was highly tempted to sneakily check it out to myself right then and there. I thought the title was a little humorous, and that combined with the cover art caught my eye right away (and mention of a Dachshund named Longanisa in the blurb only added to the appeal). I'm not sure when I'll be finishing my fantasy craze and getting to the few mysteries I have on this list, but I'm very much looking forward to this book when I do.

Number 11- The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo by Taylor Jenkins Reid

Another mystery and another book that has been very popular on the internet. I didn't originally have specific plans to read this book, but I saw a few posts about it floating around at about the same time I was putting my list together, and I thought maybe it was time to see what all the hype was about. The plot certainly sounds interesting, and I'll be looking forward to this one as I work my way through the list.

Number 12- Vanishing Girls by Lauren Oliver

This is one I inherited from my sister when she was cleaning out her own collection of books, and it's been sitting on my shelf for years now, constantly getting pushed back in the TBR by newer titles. I've read a handful of Lauren Oliver books and enjoyed most of them, and since it's been sitting on my shelf so long and I'm hoping to read a few other mysteries this season, I think it's time to finally give this one a shot.

Number 13- The Surrender Theory by Caitlin Conlon

These last few are a bit of a mix. This first one, a collection of poems, was an absolutely adventure to track down recently. I don't remember how exactly I stumbled upon it in the first place, but I ended up reading the preview on Google Books sometime around Winter or Spring last year. Not only was it some of the most engaging poetry I've ever read, it had a poem related to The Great Gastby, which absolutely sent it over the edge for me because I am OBSESSED with The Great Gatsby. A month or so ago, I decided I wanted to read it again, but it had been lost in my mess of tabs and automatically cleared from my history. I only found it again by chance when looking through the Favorites album in my gallery and, lo and behold, there was a screenshot of the Gatsby poem with the title of the book at the top. Now I am very happy to say that I will be reading it as soon as possible. Though that as soon as possible may be some time, seeing as none of the libraries in my system have this particular book as of yet. Perhaps I'll have to buy it as a little treat to myself for surviving the holiday season.

Number 14- Self-Made Boys: A Great Gatsby Remix by Anna-Marie McLemore

This feels appropriate to put next after just having mentioned my ardent love for Gatsby. I was beyond excited when The Great Gatsby came into public domain a few years ago and all of the retellings started to appear. My eyes were wide with possibility and my heart full of joy because it truly is my favorite classic and one of my favorite books period. There are a few other adaptations besides this one that I'd like to read later on, including The Chosen and the Beautiful by Nghi Vo and Beautiful Little Fools by Jillian Cantor, but this one is at the top of my list for now, and so has made it onto my Winter TBR.

Number 15- Since We Last Spoke by Brenda Rufener

I can't remember now if I saw this book at the library or in a YouTube video, but either way it's the last one on my list! I tried (and failed) to find proof without getting spoilers, but at least from the cover, this novel seems like it takes place in Winter, which is a big reason why I added it to this list. I'm very much the kind of person who likes to match the vibe of a book to the season I'm in. Sometimes the vibe I imagine a book has makes real, logical sense, and sometimes it is utterly nonsensical, but I believe this one is grounded in logic. If I need a break from all of the fantasy or something to transition me back into realistic fiction after I've finished the fantasy frenzy, I'm sure I'll reach for this one.

Book Rec and Drink of the Month

Photo by lil artsy

For my very first monthly book rec, I'd like to recommend The Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes by Suzanne Collins. I wasn't originally going to recommend anything from the list, especially something I hadn't actually read yet, but I just adore The Hunger Games so much, and I have such high hopes for both the book and the movie. Additionally, I've always found Collins' writing style and storytelling to be so compelling, and as I've grown older I've come to appreciate the messages and themes within the text more, so I feel I can recommend the book in good conscious despite never have cracked open the cover.

As for my drink this month, I've been really enjoying the white hot chocolate from Starbucks. I'm not exactly a coffee gal, so I'm also not exactly a Starbucks gal, but I've been a few times recently, and the white hot chocolate is just amazing. I remember liking it as a kid and it still holds up today. I think it's a perfect cozy Winter beverage to sip while enjoying some books.

Thus concludes my first ever blog post! I certainly enjoyed writing it, and I hope I continue to enjoy writing them. If this reaches any eyes, I encourage you to leave a comment with some of your own Winter TBR books, book recs, or favorite cozy drinks. I'll be back in about a month with something new. Until then, stay safe and healthy and may the book gods bless thee with ample time to read and plenty of beverages to sip.

#kbblog #bookblr #blog #book blog #book recs #tbr #tbr pile

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lilygreyham · 2 years ago

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Fundamentals 1: Week 4

15th March

At the end of this class where we are learning about the basic photo editing tools in Photoshop, Toby gave us a homework task where we have to choose two coloured photos and two black and white photos and edit them using the same adjustment tools. I decided to use photos that I had taken on my phone (which doesn't have a great camera on it) so I was excited to see what I could do to improve them.

The first photo I used was one I took at my favourite beach, Blackhead.

As you can see from a first glance the photo looks pretty dull and doesn't have a lot of vibrance to it. The sun was only just rising behind the hills so it is also a bit dark from where I took the photo. What I want to do here is make the photo brighter while still maintaining the dark shadows and silhouette, and also make it more saturated to bring out the colour in the sky and the clouds. As always my first step is to bring up the curves adjustment layer.

I adjust the top of the curve to bring it closer to where the pixel information starts on the lighter side (far right). Just by doing this there is already an improvement on the brightness of the sky as well as the reflection on the water while the shadows are still dark. You can also see that by adjusting the brightness there is slightly more colour present in the right side of the sky. I added a couple more points to the curve to play around with brightness but felt pretty happy with how it looked. My next step was to add the hue/saturation adjustment layer.

Straight away the saturation makes a huge difference to the photo. There is so much more colour and vibrance in the sky and on the water which definitely looks more realistic and how I saw it through my own eyes. I didn't feel the need to change the hue at all as I was really happy with how this has turned out. Just in case, I decided to have a look at the colour balance layer to see if I could improve the photo any further.

After playing around with the colour balance of the photo I realised that there wasn't much that I could do to make the photo look better (in my opinion). While looking at the highlights I added the slightest hint of yellow which makes the photo look slightly warmer and after that I think I found my desired end result. Really happy with how it looks especially when comparing it to the original photo. Here's how they look beside each other:

Oh what a surprise, the next photo I decided to use was also from Blackhead. I think this was actually from the same morning as the first photo.

As you can see it is equally as dull and dark so some adjustments need to be made. First things first I bring up the curves adjustment layer.

I actually found this curve to be quite tricky to adjust. While I wanted to make the sky look brighter it actually started to lose some of the pixel information on the far right side in the middle. I felt like this was the best look I could get where the sky is slightly brighter (and already looking more vibrant) without making it look washed out. I also added a curve in the darker area so that the rocky landscape was a bit more visible and detailed. My next step - hue/saturation.

Adjusting the saturation definitely made this photo more vibrant and lively. Again I couldn't add too much saturation as the white part of the sky would start to lose information and just look oversaturated. But I was really happy with this, making simple adjustments like the curves and saturation can have such a positive change on the quality of the photo and make it look more realistic - like it wasn't taken with an average quality camera. I didn't feel the need to look at the colour balance layer because this already was the desired look that I wanted. Here's a comparison of the two photos:

The next photo is one that I took at New Brighton beach in Christchurch using a black and white filter on my phone's camera

The sun was setting behind me so the majority on the landscape is quite dark and the only bright area is the water and the clouds. My goal here is to add a little bit more light to the sand and sky without over doing it.

I found this photo was quite difficult to adjust without making the sky too light where it would lose information. While I was making the sky brighter I started to lose the shadows of the clouds so it was hard to find the right balance of both. I managed to add some more light to the sand so I was happy about that. It definitely felt harder to correct a black and white landscape photo as the details are quite small and easy to lose while making adjustments. It's a photo that I could try keep making tiny adjustments to but overall I was happy with the end result. Here's a comparison of the two photos:

And the last photo! One of my hometown, at the Oamaru harbour. I also used a black and white filter on my phone when taking this photo.

The black and white filter added a vignette sort of look which would be hard to correct so I decided to focus on the centre area of the photo and adjusting the brightness to add a bit more detail. To the curves adjustment layer!

I brought the top of the curve close to where the pixel information started which definitely improved the detail of the lighter areas in the photo. As you can see in the bottom half of the curve I added a point where I brought some of the darker pixels into the lighter area of the graph. By doing this I made some of the darker pixels, mostly around the bushes in the foreground but also on the hillside in the background a little bit lighter which again added some more detail to the photo without losing any information. I was happy with the end result especially when comparing it the the original photo, the slightest adjustments can make all the difference. Here's how the two photos look together:

I really enjoyed this homework task as I had the chance to work on my own photos and edit them to get the desired look that I wanted and also learn that it can be difficult to get the desired look but to try achieve it anyway. It was also a great way to continue getting familiar with the adjustment layers and tools on Photoshop.

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sinceileftyoublog · 2 years ago

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The Lost Days Interview: 8-Track Document

Sarah Rose Janko & Tony Molina; Photo by Alicia Vanden Heuvel

BY JORDAN MAINZER

The combination of lo-fi power pop and warm-hearted Americana is not one I would have chalked up to work on paper, but The Lost Days are pretty perfect. Tony Molina and Dawn Riding’s Sarah Rose Janko met at a memorial, quickly hitting it off and turning their mutual musical admiration into a full-blown home recording project. They released the Lost Demos EP in 2021, and afterwards, Molina, still wanting to churn out bursting, cassette-recorded pop songs a la Bill Fox’s first three records, started to write with Sarah’s voice in mind. The two eventually recorded these songs at Nick Bassett’s basement studio on his Yamaha MT8X 8 track; the result is The Lost Days’ debut album In The Store, out today via Speakeasy Studios SF.

Molina and Janko’s musical relationship early on was defined by all-night singing sessions and empty wine bottles; In The Store, in contrast, is a 13-minute document of alcoholism, being subsumed by it, the self-involvement of it, and ultimate recovery from it. Alongside shimmery guitar, keyboard, and organ, jangly percussion, and Janko’s sweet coo are fatalistic lyrics. “I think I’m gonna have to tell you that the present don’t look too good,” they sing on the album’s opening song. On the chugging, wiry “For Today”, they sing, in a duet of dependency, “The hardest part of staying sober is any time that you come over.” On the layered and melancholy “Long Before You Know”, Molina realizes that “Everyone will talk about when you have fallen,” toeing the line between self-awareness and egocentrism. If on Molina’s solo records he jam packs a thousand musical ideas into a runtime in the teens, on In The Store, he and Janko tell a whole story, too, at once personal and universal.

Last month, I sent Molina some questions over email about The Lost Days, working with Sarah, In The Store, and his favorite Guided By Voices record. Read his responses below, edited for clarity.

Since I Left You: How would you compare writing for another person's voice versus your own? What are the similarities and differences?

Tony Molina: For this record, the only difference was that I had to change the key of certain songs for Sarah to sing them because I have a lower register with my voice. So it wasn’t an issue as long as I had a capo on me.

SILY: A lot of the influences on this record (Bill Fox, Guided By Voices, The Beatles) are named influences in your solo records, too. Were there any newfound touchpoints for this specific project?

TM: Mainly, The Lost Days are a home recording project and not a studio entity. I had been on a Bill Fox bender for about three and a half years when I made this one, so the concept was to make the record on cassette. Bill uses a 4-track; we used a cassette 8-track. Besides Bill and the Tobin [Sprout]-era GBV classics, I’ve been wanting to make a record on cassette since my mentors and older brothers from the West Bay, Los Rabbis, Tommy Lasorda, and Broken Strings were on that tip when I was a youngster. It took me about 20 years to get the guts to do it, but it finally happened.

SILY: How do you achieve the contrast of bright, sunny melodies and harmonies with melancholy or dark lyrics?

TM: I don’t know, melodies are melodies, I’m not someone who can write a song about surfing or having pizza parties or whatever other fools do.

SILY: Many of the songs on In The Store reference alcoholism. This project was also born out of a time when you and Sarah were "singing to an audience of empty wine bottles" and frequenting a liquor store you frequented in a formative time in your career. What's your relationship with alcohol these days, especially as it pertains to music? I've read that you often don't pull from your personal life in your songwriting, but I'm wondering if this record is an exception.

TM: Yo shout out Jacksons Liquors!!! The whole album is about alcoholism and from the perspective of someone who sees the world through an alcoholic lens. The thing about alcoholics is that we have a lot in common and share similar stories and experiences. So I was touching on some things from my personal life that I think are super common among others who live a similar life. From the darkest points of addiction, struggling with recovery, and chronic relapse, to the paranoia and anxiety that comes from withdrawal. As a person in recovery, I felt like I needed to document these things at the time when I was going through it.

SILY: Songs like "Long Before You Know" and "Pass The Time" make references to other people's perception of you, and how it may or may not affect you. How often are you thinking about these outward feelings in your songwriting?

TM: These songs are also about the life of a fader, specifically the self-centeredness that comes with addiction.

SILY: The title track is the longest song on here, with two verses and comparatively complex arrangements. What compels you to write shorter songs? Do you think you'll ever play around with more non-traditional pop song structures?

TM: I think I just do what feels right. The first time Ovens were ever on wax in ‘04 we had an 8-minute song on the compilation Letters From The Landfill. That song was long as fuck! So it kinda just depends.

SILY: What's the story behind the album art?

TM: I didn’t know what to use, so I think Sarah and I decided a liquor store and a fool getting faded in a graveyard would look sick. Sarah was down to do it, so there you go.

SILY: What's your favorite GBV album, and why?

TM: Same Place the Fly Got Smashed, hands down!!! Its a concept record about an alcoholic fool who turns into a murderer! Its got some super dark moments, and it sounds like a gloomy rainy day in Dayton. On some true Midwest darkness. There’s also some great upbeat feel good songs on it, too. But you know, “Drinker’s Peace”, “Club Molluska”, those are heavy. That is easily my favorite GBV ever and has been for a long time.

SILY: What else is next for you in the short and long term future?

TM: Some reissues of old stuff, and I still record all the time.

SILY: What have you been listening to, watching, and reading lately?

TM: I’ve been listening to Heron's self-titled and Duncan Browne’s self-titled (with bonus tracks) religiously.

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infitsovermisfits · 2 years ago

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The Two-Headed Calf - Steve Harrington x Eddie Munson

AN: if you know the poem, you know. If you don't i recommend u check it out. i remembered it and started crying over it, cried for a while and thought you know what would make a great steddie fanfic? and here we are. I have a horrific migrane and i feel like trash but i finished this :) good.

WARNINGS: rewriting season 4 so Eddie lives, violence, self-hatred, internalised homophobia, Steve's got bad parents, neglectful/abusive parents, angst with a happy ending (i have a migrane and I'm too tired to type these out) APOLOGIES FOR MY POOR EDITING/WRITING ;-;

word count: 4402

Some nights, Steve lay awake out in the fields of Hawkins, as far away from the town as he could get and just stare at the clouds. Stared at the sky until the colours faded from the soft shade of blue to orange and pink and then dark. Out here, he could see all the constellations. All the distant stars, glittering in the sky above.

His mind would run, thoughts drifting through his head like the clouds gently rolling through the blue above. Thinking of everything and nothing all at once. If he was anywhere else, those thoughts would likely overwhelm and consume him. Here, though overwhelming, he could think more clearly. He'd never tell anyone where he was, so no one could disturb him up here. Here, he was alone, but he could breathe. He could lay on the grass at the apex of the hill, take a deep breath, and lose himself.

Maybe Steve Harrington didn't understand what love was.

Sure he'd kissed girls before and had girlfriends- had relationships his whole adolescence. But looking back on it, did any of those girls ever even love him? When perfect Nancy Wheeler came along, he thought she was the one. She didn't use him for the money or the popularity or the access to Tommy H's parties. She wouldn't randomly disappear only to leave him feeling worthless, or force him to do anything he didn't want. And sure, he may have appeared like an asshole from afar but she never said that. She never did.

Perhaps that's why he fell for her harder than anyone else before. Because she was so kind to him. Because she cared about him.

Was he in the wrong to be jealous of her and Johnathan? Calling her a slut and publically shaming her in front of the entire town was a far stretch- he recognised that. And Jonathan had physically punched some sense into his stubborn head. The guilt bubbled from inside, eating away at him but why had he let it? What else was he supposed to do when his girlfriend was spending more time with some random guy she hardly knew than her own boyfriend?

She had called their relationship bullshit. Sure she was drunk, but that usually gives people the courage to say what's really on their minds. A drunk man's words are a sober man's thoughts, right? But something he was always so curious of but too terrified to ask- where her feelings for him bullshit, or did she think his love for her was?

Those two thoughts clashed together in his brain for the entirety of that fall. When he wasn't saving kids from the Upside Down or battling against Demogorgons, Steve would feel... Empty.

Maybe Steve wasn't deserving of love.

He'd see other kids with their parents- running to them with their exams marked with big bright 'A's and hugging them. Hugging their own parents. The last time any of his parents had hugged him was for family photos last Winter- and that let alone could hardly be defined as a hug. Just gentle pats on the shoulders- nothing bone-crushing or severe. Sensible.

He'd walk around that huge house of his sometimes and stare at those pictures. How his parents never smiled, never expressed emotions. Always stoic, always emotionless. Always them. He'd think about going to the parties in houses a few blocks down, and about taking a moment to lock himself away in a room and just be by himself. His eyes would always drift to the happy families in their pictures, the polaroids of kids opening Christmas presents with dates marked in December. Their first days of school. Their first football, or basketball games.

Steve didn't have any polaroids. He rarely asked for Christmas or birthday gifts anymore, he just made sure to smile and thank his father and kiss his mother on the cheek for a sweater or some cash. That is, if they were around. In the evening, they'd go visit his aunts and cousins to wish them their Merry Christmas' and disappear once again, leaving him alone.

When they first started leaving- to work, on business trips out of town- Steve thought he was the luckiest kid in the world. No babysitter? No parents? He could watch cartoons until the sun rose in the morning and eat chocolate pancakes for lunch. But that lost the charm as quickly as it came. When he became a teenager, it was only useful for parties. The house would be full of people in the once-empty rooms, the water of his pool rippling against the bodies there... Though he knew he'd be cleaning vomit from the kitchen and scrubbing the counters clean until the late afternoon the day after, alone once again.

Everything he learned to survive was on his own, and a large part of him decided maybe that's how he'd live for the rest of his life. No wife or children to come home to. Just him and his big, empty house.

He always longed for a family. Someone to fill the empty spaces. He hadn't expected Dustin Henderson, a kid grades below him, to become like a brother to him on a hunt for a creature that ate his cat. He didn't expect to be defending Lucas Sinclair and Max Mayfield from said creatures with a baseball bat- or for Max to steal his car after he got beaten up by her step-brother. Protecting them from threat, and imminent death- it filled the emptiness of being needed. And being in pain at least made him feel something.

By the time he graduated and summer came along, he took up a job in Starcourt and met Robin. The job gave him something to do now that he was out of school. His parents could afford for him to go to university but something was stopping him. He told himself it was the threat of those things coming back for the kids that he had adopted as his family but that wasn't entirely true. The honest, scary, truth was the knowledge that his teenage years would end and he would have become an adult- that is what kept him from going. Being anything remotely like his parents.

And even if in that summer, he had infiltrated a secret Russian base beneath the mall, gotten drugged and beaten within an inch of his life, and then confessed his feelings to his co-worker and got rejected by her... He still felt happy. They had all lived thanks to him. And he had gained a lifelong friend in Robin.

They worked together again in Family Video, which compared to scooping ice cream was equally as easy. Stacking tapes on the shelves, hanging up new posters in the windows or around the store and talking the customers into seeing certain movies- he could do that. Operating the computers was a little more difficult so he left that to Robin. She always seemed to get the hang of them quicker.

When they weren't working, they were talking. About the girls they liked around town, or home, or their friends' lives. Sharing how crazy it was that their children were all grown up- starting High school. Though he tried giving them advice, they weren't keen to hear it, claiming they'd be fine and 'thanks for worrying, mom'. At this point, he wouldn't fight them. He was starting to nag them like a mother would- or should.

When Dustin mentioned Eddie, it was almost like time stood still for Steve. He hardly knew the guy, Dustin had to fill some blanks in. Long hair, metalhead, plays DnD. Right. Steve had only heard stories about him- he didn't think ever shared the same class, let alone were in the same grade. Stories of how he punched someone in the face and got suspended because they'd cut his hair. Stories of him and his 'cult' in Hellfire sacrificing cats to the Devil from around town. Stories of an outsider everyone was seemingly afraid of.

He had been wary for his friend, attempting to retell him the sacrificing animals part, but when Dustin told him the club was nothing like that, Steve was confused. Of course it was about that dungeons and dragons game- though Dustin tried to teach Steve how to play countless of times before he went to Camp Know-Where, he never got the hang of it. And now that someone else was there for him at school?

Was it jealousy he felt? It was so stupid to be jealous of someone he hardly knew- with the way Dustin described him as almost Godlike, it was hard not to though. Some darkness inside him would whisper that he was being replaced, that Dustin wouldn't need him anymore, that no one needed him. Then Robin would click her fingers in front of his face and point to the Pamela Anderson cutout he still needed to take to the back and he would silence his thoughts until he got to the hill.

When Dustin appeared after that Hawkin's student was announced dead, begging him to help him find Eddie, he was reluctant. Eventually, he relented tapping away at the computer- he hated seeing Dustin so distressed.

Upon first meeting him, Eddie had held the sharpened edge of a bottle up to Steve's neck, shoving him hard against the flimsy walls of a boathouse he had never been to and threatening to kill him. And even with the adrenaline coursing through his body, the bruising grip on his shoulder that reminded him of his father on a bad day, Steve saw his eyes. The pain and the fear inside them made his heart constrict with feeling. Accused of murder- he didn't deserve this. They'd find a way to prove Eddie's innocence.

It should have been obvious to them all that the sudden murders occurring in town would be the fault of the alternate dimension under their town- though he wasn't sure how monsters would look in an alibi to the police.

Though Eddie had mentioned Nancy's selfless act of jumping into Lover's lake for him as an unambiguous sign of love as his cynical eyes had seen, Steve didn't believe that. Steve had long made peace with the fact that maybe he wasn't in love with Nancy in the first place. He had almost died with Robin and knew her secret- he loved her deeply but only only ever as a friend. Eddie... He hardly knew. And he still jumped after him.

He wanted to point that out to him, say something clever and sly to impress him but an earthquake sent them gripping onto one another arms to keep steady. And why did he suddenly, simultaneously feel so calm, yet so nervous in Eddie's grasp?

Their final, he hoped, enemy to kill would be the mastermind. Vecna, as Dustin had called him- a name taken straight from one of Eddie's campaigns. Though Steve hated the idea that they were all putting themselves into mortal danger and he couldn't be there all at once to help them- especially Max, having seen her almost die in the graveyard and entirely not approving of the plan that she'd be the one to bring him to Creele house- he had to bite his tongue. There was no other way, he told himself.

And by some grace of God, they had killed him. The molotovs Steve and Robin flung at him set him ablaze; Nancy dealing the fatal shots as he fell through the top-story window and dissolved gruesomely into the ground below. It was over.

Though of course they were stuck in the parallel dimension on the brink of its collapse without it's creator being alive- and when Robin mentioned she hadn't heard Eddie's guitar in a long time, an unexpected pang of fear shot through Steve's heart. The three darted between the vines, though found it odd to see them seemingly retreating away from the three as they made their way to the trailer park.

Dustin's heartbroken cries of Eddie's name sent his heart racing. Steve had never seen anyone die before, and Eddie certainly looked worse for wear with the amount of blood pouring from his legs and neck. How he, Robin and Nancy all managed to drag him out of there was a miracle- especially with the portal closing behind them so suddenly, the crack in the ceiling on their side disappearing. The connection forever severed.

When the police came for Eddie, Steve was the first to step up. He lied about Eddie being at his home for a small gathering he had with Robin at the time of the murder- just the three of them. Thankfully, she covered for him, forming a solid alibi. Eddie would be free once he made it out of the hospital.

Ever worried for his kids, he'd stayed behind all night to make sure they were okay. Something about Max's pale face and seeing her arms and legs in those casts constricted his heart. Memories of her on her skateboard outside his home, along the roads, orange hair a fiery blaze behind her. When would she be able to skate again?

It all became unbearable- knowing in part it was his fault she was stuck here like this. He stepped out of the room at the same time as an older man- someone he would come to know as Wayne Munson. The look of relief on his face spoke volumes, and when he walked over to Steve and enveloped him in a tight hug, he felt like sobbing there and then. He could hardly hear the man's rambling of thanks, the blood rushing through his ears the tears threatening to spill down his cheeks. But he couldn't cry. Not here.

He simply pat the man on the shoulder once he had let him go and returned his smile- his happy, relieved smile. "You saved my boy, son. Thank you." He had told him. Son.

Eddie's warm, brown gaze was fixed on the ceiling when he pushed the door open and entered. Steve knew they called him a freak and a devil worshiper... But here, he looked angelic. His hair an unruly mess creating a halo around his head, a single lamp off to the side casting him in white light. The bandana he had was removed from his hair and there was a bandage on his neck, splotched with blood. It had also stained the neck of the hospital gown he was wearing. To his surprise, he was handcuffed to the bed. He remembered the blue uniform of the officer standing guard outside. Why?

"Are you just gonna keep staring, or did you need something?" Eddie's voice was hoarse. It cracked, and tore through the quiet, only broken up rhythmically by the beeping of the heart monitor he was hooked up to,

"Why-" Steve's throat was so dry. When was the last time he ate anything? Likely before battle, "You're cuffed..." Steve gestured weakly. Eddie's gaze finally met Steve's before he glanced down. he moved his wrist so the metal clinked against itself,

"Mhm," Steve stepped closer, "Safety precaution. Hawkin's still thinks I'm a murderer," Eddie said it so casually, a hint of melancholy in his tone. Like he had accepted his fate. And for some odd... Odd reason, Steve's blood boiled at the thought.

"We'll make sure to change their minds," He said with determination, though Eddie scoffed and shook his head, "Hey, man it'll-"

"Why'd you even say anything?" Eddie spat, those brown eyes filled with anger and confusion, "Huh? You could have told them the truth but you lied-" He whispered, wary of the guard outside, "-to the cops about me!?" The anger morphed to something else- to... Confusion, "Why didn't you just hand me over? Told them I killed her- it's more hassle than I'm worth-"

"It's not...!" Eddie went quiet, fixing him with a stare, "Look, would you rather go to jail for a murder you didn't do?"

"Would you rather have the town know you hang out with a freak like me?" The hurt behind those words was so obvious to Steve as he watched a lone tear slip down Eddie's cheek. How long had people been calling him a freak that he grew this used to the word?

"Yeah," Steve said honestly, "Yeah I would, Eddie,"

Eddie leaned back against the pillows and blinked in disbelief. His eyes darted over the blank covers over his legs before he sighed. Steve was a jock- Steve was everything Eddie disagreed with on a fundamental basis. Good at sports, good at picking up girls, good at socialising with other people. He was popular. Belonged to a stupid system in schools- a pointless hierarchy the mindless asshats followed.

Eddie was shunned for not fitting in at all. He grew accustomed to the name-calling, to the labels. At some point, he thought there really was something wrong with him. And maybe there was- somewhere deep, deep down, something was just not right. Not how he was supposed to be.

Here he thought Steve would be one of those to call him the devil... Yet here he was, unafraid to protect him. To protect Dustin, protect those kids. He tried his hardest to save them all, and he did. It was because of him that he could make it back to Wayne in one piece, not yet digested by those bats. With another deep sigh, Eddie let his head fall against the fluff of his pillows,

"Well," He hummed, chewing on the inside of his cheek as he thought, "You're saying I was at your place...?" Even if he didn't want to, agreeing to Steve's coverup held more benefits for him. They had already avenged Chrissy by killing off that monster...

Considering Eddie and Wayne's trailer had been destroyed with the closing of the portals, they were relatively homeless. Until Steve offered them both a guest bedroom each in his own home. Even though the town was less than approving, let alone his parents, he felt it was the least he could do. Give them both a home until they could find somewhere else to live.

It also gave them time to spend with one another. They shared a love for staying up way late into the silence of the night, where no one could yell at or bother them, gazing up at the stars above. Sometimes they would listen to music; sometimes Eddie would play music on a guitar Steve dug out for him from the garage. They always found themselves with one another at night.

The nightmares of it all- the fire, the bats. Wrapping around Steve's neck. Biting into Eddie's flesh. Sleep was difficult when their minds would replay the events of that fall on a loop. Their shared nightmares led to seeing the other more; either sleepily meeting in the kitchen, at the top of the staircase, or simultaneously leaving their rooms.

Steve was unsure when one night Eddie suggested they shared a bed. It had been a particularly bad night- Steve waking up shaking and crying and Eddie being on high alert, eyes darting over any dark corner in the kitchen as they sipped their tea together in the moonlight streaming in through the window. But he agreed.

Though he was still unsettled, being wrapped in Eddie's arms brought him more peace than he had felt in years. Knowing the exact pain one another was going through and either quietly whispering about it, or distracting one another with whispers of reassurance quelled their anxieties. Steve had never been held like this before. Like the other person truly and deeply cared for him, wanted to take the bad from his head so he would feel okay. He felt it so strongly from Eddie... He never wanted to let him go.

"Yeah so... They're giving us temporary housing out in Lawrence- I think it's right next to Indianapolis?" Eddie told him as they got out of the car, "I'm moving out to the big city, Steve," he chuckled, pulling a guitar from the back of Steve's car and slinging it onto his back. He falls into step beside Steve as the gravel crunches beneath their feet,

"Shit, that is far," Steve frowns as they step onto grass, footsteps muffled,

"Don't worry- I'll get you the address and phone number as soon as I can," He says quickly, "Oh! Also, since I apparently failed High School so many times and I can't retake any of the classes because of... All the shit that happened, they're giving me a- and hear this," He puts his arms out with a grin, "Circumstantial pass," He grins brightly, and Steve can't help but smile and laugh along with him,

"That's great for you, Eds," he says,

"I know! Good riddance- you know I really won't fucking miss Hawkins," He says fondly, sighing. They reach their destination and stop, staring forwards. The said town looks miniature from the distance they're at. Steve can't focus on it for long and instead turns his head to the side to watch Eddie's hair gently blowing in the wind. The pink sky fading behind him and the happy smile on his lips... "Maybe I'll miss you. And Hellfire," He says with a shrug. He gives Steve a brief look, before glancing around, "This it?"

"Uhh, yeah!" Steve nods, "It is," He's quickly taking off his old Hawkins High varsity jacket and sets it on the grass. He motions Eddie to it,

"You're such a gentleman, Stevie," Eddie smirks, and Steve just smiles and rolls his eyes like the nickname doesn't make him feel like he's on top of the world. His hands are on his hips as he watches Eddie sit on the material and pull the guitar from over his shoulder to set in his lap. Only then does he sit next to him, stretching his legs out before him as Eddie begins to pluck the strings gently. Steve can't recognise the tune, but whatever it is he likes it. It's calming, "I was telling the truth though," Eddie's voice is soft again when he speaks, just quiet enough that it doesn't interrupt the peace the guitar brings; just quiet enough that it gets Steve's attention,

"About what?" He asks, hearing Eddie chuckle softly,

"That I'll miss you," He says, "If someone told me that my last happy memories in Hawkins, Indiana would be with Steve Harrington, I would have called them a freak," He snorts to himself, "And that's coming from me," He grins,

"You really shouldn't call yourself a freak, Eddie," Steve says, and he can't stop fucking looking at Eddie. He feels the skin of his neck and cheeks burn whenever Eddie casts him these little glances, just little peaks of the brown eyes he so deeply longs to stare at forever. He needs to commemorate him to memory- he needs this version of Eddie, uncharacteristically calm and overwhelmingly happy to be the one that stays with him for the rest of his life,

"I've heard it all my life," He shrugs dismissively,

"That can still change," Steve shrugs back. Eddie hums, missing a chord,

"Oh?" He muses, "Change to what?" He asks curiously,

"Saviour," Steve breathes, "Of the world. Without you, we would have never defeated Vecna and saved everyone," Eddie has stopped playing music,

"You really think so?" Steve looks to see the smallest of smiles on Eddie's lips. He looks timid, uncertain of the compliment. Steve can only nod, not trusting his mouth to say the right words. Eddie nods back, though his smile widens and he grins to himself, "Eddie the Saviour," He breathes, rings clicking against the wood of the guitar as he rests his hands on it, "You know that has a good ring to it," He glances back at Steve when he laughs,

"Sure it does,"

"Though, I have you to thank too, King Steve," And when it comes from Eddie's lips, it's full of pride and joy. A beautiful warmth blossoms in Steve's chest, "Saving me like that and dragging me out of Hell," He feels a gentle push to his arm,

"Well, yeah I mean... You needed saving," He says, smiling and casting Eddie another glance,

"So you're saying I'm your princess? Fair maiden? Damsel in distress?" Eddie asks, a playful glint in his eye,

"No, I wasn't- don't put words in my mouth Munson," Steve laughs though, and just barely misses Eddie sitting up a little straighter and removing the guitar from his lap,

"Mhm... It'd make you a Prince," Eddie tells him, "Knight in shining armour... My saviour," He can feel Eddie shift closer, then appear into view. He's sitting with his back to the town, focusing his gaze on Steve's; eyes flicking over the moles dotting his cheeks, the upturned curve of his lips and the way his hair is slightly falling into his eyes,

"Your saviour?" There's no need to be loud when it's only them here. Only them, away from the prying eyes of the town they've grown to hate, the town they gave so much to protect,

"Mhm," Eddie hums happily. His tongue darts out to wet his lips, "And I think..." He pauses, "You deserve a reward," Eddie plucks a flower from where it grows beside the jacket, turning it over in his hands, it's white petals and yellow centre becoming a blur as it spins between his fingers, "For your valiant efforts and effervescent courage," Steve snorts at that,

"Right," He says with amusement, though plays along, "And what reward do you suggest, Eddie?" He asks, leaning forward in invitation.

From here, Steve can see the healed scarring on Eddie's neck, a paler colour compared to the rest of his neck. Then dipping just below the Motorhead shirt, a deeper bruise. A love bite from a few days before, formed in Steve's room against the wall near his closet. The sunlight glitters on the chain of Eddie's necklace under the rapidly setting sun, and a small grin is set on his plush, pink lips. He has never seen someone look so... Beautiful,

"A kiss," And who is Steve to deny the one he has found to love a kiss?

Lying together on the hill, Steve's head resting in Eddie's lap as he rambled on about Orion and Cassiopeia up there, Steve's heart soared. There was truly no other place he'd want to be.

Tonight, there were twice as many stars in the sky as there were before.

#eddie #eddie stranger things #eddie munson #eddie munson x steve harrington #steve harrington #steve x eddie #stranger things #stranger things season four #stranger things season 4 #stranger things spoilers #eddie munson stranger things #stranger things 4 #st4 #stranger things 4 spoilers #harrington #steddie #steveddie #eddie x steve

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greensparty · 3 years ago

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Book Review: Olivia Harrison “Came the Lightening: Twenty Poems for George”

Olivia Harrison married her husband George Harrison in 1978 about a month after their son Dhani was born. After George’s first marriage to Pattie Boyd ended (Eric Clapton, “Layla”, yada yada yada), he built a new life with Olivia, who he met when she was working at A&M Records and later helped run his Dark Horse Records. Following the passing of George in 2001 at age 58, Olivia remained mostly out of the spotlight (the Harrison’s were always very private), but she was involved in producing the 2002 Concert for George tribute concert, consulting on the Love show from Cirque de Soleil, overseeing numerous George Harrison box sets including last year’s All Things Must Pass 50th Anniversary Edition, producing Martin Scorsese’s documentary George Harrison: Living in the Material World and Peter Jackson’s The Beatles: Get Back, and involved in several charities as well.

George and Olivia Harrison circa 1970s

She has also authored some books about George. In 2002, she wrote the intro for the reissue to George’s memoir I, Me, Mine and she wrote the Concert for George book in 2005 and the companion book to George Harrison: Living in the Material World in 2011. This week Genesis Publications released Olivia’s book Came the Lightening: Twenty Poems for George. Last year marked 20 years since George’s passing and this collection of poems and photos is her own personal reflection on her life with George.

book cover

Before I get into reviewing this, let me say, I don’t normally read poetry books, with the exception of beat poets like Jack Kerouac and poets of that era. Nothing against any poets, it is a great art form, it’s just in all the time I’m reading poetry, I feel like I could be listening to music (which incorporates poetry) or watching a movie (visual poetry). Having said this, I am a lifelong Beatle fanatic and George was always my favorite Beatle, so this poetry book had my attention right away. There is a lot of details about George that Olivia is writing about that will have Beatle fanatics analyzing for years to come. There are also some never-before-seen photos and drawings that are amazing too. It is hard to review this book the way I review other books, where I write about what I liked and didn’t like, because this is more than a book. It is Olivia’s way of remembering her husband and the life they shared. I was very moved by some of the poems too. Truly a beautiful collection!

For info on Came the Lightening: https://www.genesis-publications.com/book/9781905662814/came-the-lightening

4 out of 5 stars

#came the lightening #George Harrison #olivia harrison #book review #books #music nerd #the beatles

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cloud-9ine · 4 years ago

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Through a Golden Lens (pt 1)

⤷ pairing - hawks x (fem) reader

⤷ fandom - bnha

⤷ warnings - some language, hawks flirting, reader’s cynicism

⤷ summary - reader is a bitter, overworked photographer at a hero press agency with little patience for her newly assigned muse- hawks

⤷ word count - 4.5k+

⤷ notes - i have lots of ideas so this is probably going to be a multi-part series. also new to tumblr so this might not be the best

⤷ pt 1, pt 2, pt 3, pt 4, pt 5, pt 6

“Mr. Hawks! Please look this way!” his heavy lidded eyes rolled to the side as another blinding flash burned through his vision.

“You look perfect, thank you!” it was hard to smile for their benefit, but he managed. Hawks had attended countless of these events for the press. It had been exhilarating at first, with the rush of adrenaline from the cameras and the lights and the endless stream of compliments solidifying his place in the public eye.

Nowadays, it was less thrilling. After a while, they all seemed the same- each one blurring into a senseless flare of cameras and hollow accolades.

He was bored, to say the least.

“Mr Hawks, would you like to come and see? I’d love to hear your opinion on this set!” with a practiced, easy smirk he nodded. It was easier to pander to the artist than to criticise their work.

He looked good, but when did he not? The shoots were easy to glide through. All he had to do was pull a boyish grin, ‘make love to the camera’ as the photographers always liked to spout. It didn’t really matter what he did: the public would eat up anything with his face slapped on to the front. They all looked the same to him, anyway.

“Looks good,” he wondered why people were so easily satiated by shallow praises, but as he stared at the younger lady’s blush, he couldn’t help but realise that maybe it was him who had something to do with it.

Hawks couldn’t help his gaze from drifting to the door. His skin prickled in the humidity of all the moving bodies in one enclosed space and he longed to take a step outside and stretch his wings in a way that wasn’t to pose for a magazine.

For a moment, he felt like his prayers had been answered when the door opened, letting in a stream of natural light to breach the artificiality of the modelling room.

”(L/N)! You were supposed to be here over three hours ago!” the woman in front of him exclaimed, ripping the camera away from his view and marching to the figure that appeared in the light. He blinked in surprise: this entire shoot he hadn’t heard her raise her voice above anything but a low mumble when conversing with him, and now she was positively fuming.

You stared down at your co-worker through honey-tinted shades, expression unamused.

“Yeah, and I was also supposed to be out of this job three years ago. We don’t all do what we’re supposed to, cupcake.”

For a moment, Hawks thought you were a model. Tasteful cream turtleneck tucked into heavily creased mocha skirt, caramel beret perched on your head. There were a few metal, classy looking rings wrapped around your fingers, but as far as he could see, no wedding ring. It was pretty standard style for those who worked in the arts, but somehow you wore it so well.

Your hair was a little dishevelled, and the dark circles under your eyes combined with the coffee cup in your hand were obvious signs of a rough night. His eyes locked on to the loopy black handwriting on the brown band around the cup.

(L/N) (Y/N)

You were no model, but Hawks couldn’t see the difference.

His wings beat lightly behind his back as he glided over, weaving through the other photographers and models scattered around the area.

“Hey there, I’m Hawks,” he said smoothly, voice saccharine as he spoke to you. Your attention turned to him as you glanced at him from above the frames of your sunglasses, seemingly unimpressed.

“This the new boytoy, Mizuki?” you asked, eyes raking up and down his figure. Hawks was never one to shy away from the gaze of others, but the way you were inspecting him made him feel so exposed.

“Show some respect,” Mizuki muttered, voice lowered at Hawks’ presence but glare still piercing. You sighed, sparing one last glance at Hawks before snatching the camera out of Mizuki’s hands, leaving her scrambling for the device as you walked away.

“Lemme see what you’ve got already,” Mizuki’s face grew red, half from anger towards you, and half because of the embarrassment of being diminished in front of Hawks.

“(L/N) y-you can’t just come in three hours late and take over! I’ve already done the shoot and Hawks has already expressed that he is pleased with the outcome,” you scoffed, rolling your eyes and shooting the shorter woman a glare over your shoulder.

“There’s no way you’re gonna force me to come into work and make me sit here doing nothing,” you sneered, waving the camera around almost teasingly, “you wanted someone actually skilled to do this shoot, and here I am. Let me do my thing,” without waiting for a response, you left, thumb fumbling with the dial that allowed you to scroll through the photos.

Hawks was impressed. You hadn’t bat an eye when you saw him, and while you were very clearly very late, you were confident in your skills and obviously took your job seriously.

“Who was that?” he questioned, wings spreading slightly as his eyes chased after you. Mizuki bowed her head, remorse filling her expression.

“I apologise for her impertinence. That’s (L/N), she was who your original photographer was supposed to be today, but when she didn’t show up I had to take over,” she huffed, “she’s been like this for about a year now, and the boss is prepared to fire her if she keeps it up. So you’d think she’d be able to pull her at together for you, Mr. Hawks...”

After a while, Hawks tuned out her whining, eyes curiously trained on you, surveying your furrowed brows and expression pinched with annoyance as you studied the photos. Although they looked good enough to him, it appeared that you didn’t share the same sentiment.

Hawks didn’t have time to avert his eyes when you turned your head, gaze locking on to his. You raised a slightly suspicious brow, but otherwise didn’t entertain his actions.

“Mizuki, why would you use cool lighting?” you called over your shoulder, not even sparing the decency to turn around and face the person you were addressing. Mizuki frowned, moving to your side. Like a magnet, Hawks did the same, peering over your other shoulder. You eyed him from the corner of your vision for a second before tapping the screen.

“What do you mean?” you sighed at your co-workers words, evidently frustrated.

“Considering you have bird boy over here in dark academia, accented in warmer yellows, using cool lights will bring out too much of a contrast. We need to match the accent colours with warmer lighting, or use a overlay,” you muttered, seemingly addressing yourself more than the two of them. Mizuki just shook her head.

“That would just oversaturate the image,” you snorted, giving her the same patronising look an adult would give a child if they tried to outsmart them.

“Not necessarily. I could spot-reduce saturation in highlight areas during editing. Or, if you really want your contrast, I could neutralise the warmer shades by using a blue, or compliment them using a red,” Hawks didn’t miss the way you said ‘I’ instead of ‘we’. Mizuki looked agitated, her frown growing deeper.

“Even so, we only have white backdrops. That would be a jarring contrast. You’d need something darker or more clustered to make it work. If you wanted a backdrop change you probably should’ve come earlier,” she spoke with a formality that obviously stemmed from Hawks next to her, but you paid no mind. You were silent for a moment, and Hawks could see your eyes narrowing as you were thinking.

“I need a natural background, huh?” you mumbled, thumbing the buttons on the camera. With a shrug, “alright, bird boy, come on, we’re leaving,” Hawks blinked in surprise as you spun on your heel, a grin breaking onto his face. Finally, he got to leave.

“Whatever you say, boss,” you shot him an irritated look.

“Don’t call me that. I’m 22, not 40,” his feathers ruffled up. “Hey, I’m also 22! What a coincidence, right?” he grinned, winking at you. You just responded by rolling your eyes.

Mizuki spluttered, trying in vain to get either one of you to stop as Hawks trailed after you.

“L-Look, you can’t just leave-” you turned, shoving the camera back into her hands, a mirthless smile on your face.

“Watch me,” your voice was cold, goading her to try and stop you, “bird boy, out, now.” Hawks didn’t have to be told twice. Some of the others whispered and muttered as they realised what was going on, but they all fell quiet when you shot them a sharp glare.

He breathed in the fresh air with a content sigh, his chest feeling lighter now he was out the cramped room. The amber glow from the late afternoon sun kissed his tanned skin as he stretched his arms above his head, his forearms flexing slightly under his dark blazer. His eyes shut in bliss and head tilted back, exposing his sharp jawline.

You eyed him slightly, eyes trailing across his features. Now that you had actually left, you were a little lost on what your plan was. You didn’t regret storming out of there, though, nor did you even consider turning back to apologise.

You took your own camera out of the dark camera bag slung across your body, careful not to scratch it on the tripod, and focused the lens on Hawks. It was smaller, a little more compact than the ones Mizuki and the others were using, but you found that it was much better suited for portrait work.

The click of the camera shutter brought Hawks out of his stupor, eyes snapping open and immediately landing on you. Your attention had already been diverted to the screen, studying your work.

“The modelling room is stuffy, I’ll give you that,” you mumbled, zooming in on his face, “but you can stretch while we walk,” Hawks leaned over you, eyes sparkling at the shot.

“Aw, you make me look so good, I’m flattered!” you rolled your eyes.

“Don’t be,” you took a large sip of your coffee, moving down the pathway as you thought. Hawks scrambled after you, his wings puffing out when he reached your side. You couldn’t help but gaze at the bright red feathers as he unfurled his wings, a small, happy chirping noise rumbling at the back of his throat once they were fully spread behind your back. They were warm, you noticed, feeling the heat through your turtleneck.

Your vision was filled with a cheeky smirk painted on full lips, Hawks’ face appearing in front of your eyes. Your eyes narrowed as you sized him up.

“See something you like?” you rolled your eyes as he purred.

“Not in the slightest, bird brain,” his wings beat behind his back, hand clutching the fabric on his chest.

“Oh, how you wound me!” Hawks cried, and you couldn’t help but smile slightly, which you quickly covered with your coffee cup.

“I’m sure you’ll face a villain that will do greater damage than I could,” he hummed, angling his face towards the sun.

“So, where are we headed?” you chewed on your bottom lip, slinging your camera over your shoulder.

“It can’t be anywhere with lots of traffic, you attract a lot of attention, you know?” it was a rhetorical question, but Hawks’ chest still puffed out in pride at your words.

“Thanks, it’s because of my raging-”

“Shut up,” you cut him off, “either way, I have a pounding headache and I do not have enough shits to give to put up with your fan girls today,” with a sigh, you rubbed your temples. Hawks stared at your clenched teeth.

“Hey, why do you-” “I think I know where we can go,” he frowned.

“You know it’s not polite to interrupt people like that-”

“Sunflowers.” your tone dripped finality as you faced Hawks, a brazen determination in your eyes he hadn’t seen until now. It made his breath hitch in his throat.

Breathy chuckle escaping his lips, and eyebrows furrowed when you sped your pace, gulping down more of your coffee.

“Uh, what?” you waved a hand dismissively.

“There’s a sunflower field in Fukuroi City, I think it’s west from here,” the tiniest of grins etched onto your features, “it’s gonna be a lot more interesting than the rest of those blank background. Plus, the yellow will compliment your clothes, and with the sun low in the sky I’ll get my perfect warm lighting,” you explained. Hawks wasn’t sure exactly how much of a difference it would make, but the idea seemed charming, and it was more exciting than being perpetually flanked by a white screen.

“Sounds good,” he chirped, “although, to be honest, you could take me out anywhere and I wouldn’t mind,” you rolled your eyes.

“That’s a shame, because I don’t intend to hang around any more than I have to,” Hawks pouted, crossing his arms.

“Come on, I wanna know more about you!” you bristled.

“Good for you.” the two of you fell into a beat of silence before Hawks smiled, undaunted.

“I’m sure I can win you over somehow,” shaking your head in disbelief, you lifted the cup to your lips, before looking down disappointedly when you realised it was empty.

“I don’t have enough coffee for this,” you muttered. Hawks’ expression brightened.

“That’s an easy fix: your agency is around here so you must know there area pretty well,” he spoke nonchalantly, as if he was on a casual lunch date and not in the most expensive outfit you’d seen in your entire life, “what’s the best place to grab a coffee?” for a moment, you looked taken aback, before shaking your head.

“Best café in these parts is the Sunset Hour,” you said, rubbing the back of your neck, “but as much as I have no inhibitions regarding bunking off work, that’s a little too far away. I need to take this pictures before the end of the day or Mizuki’ll submit those crappy ones she took in the studio,” Hawks nodded in understanding, smile never faltering for a second.

“Well I gotta get you your caffeine fix somewhere, so what’s the second best?” your expression scrunched in thought for a moment, before you jutted a thumb over your shoulder.

“There’s a Starbucks across the road,” he snickered seeing your blank expression.

“Not exactly where I would want our first date, but I suppose it’ll do,” rolling your eyes, you shoved the empty cup to his chest, which he gripped almost instinctively.

“Good thing this isn’t a date, then,” Hawks grinned, sending your empty cup on a feather to the nearest bin before chasing after you as you crossed the road. You didn’t spare him a single glance when he appeared at your shoulder, nor when he reached over above your head to open the Starbucks door from behind you.

“So you’re saying we can have our first date somewhere else?” with a shallow sigh, you shook your head.

“What I’m saying is that there’s not gonna be a first date. Not between us,” his chest tightened. God, you were so mean. He’d be into that.

The inside of the Starbucks was a mix between modern, western architecture and traditional Japanese woodwork. The equipment was all cutting edge, and the tables and chairs were made with a sleek mahogany, but the windows were framed with bamboo shutters, and the backroom was separated with shoji sliding doors. It was an curious blend, one that you studied with an interest. The deep, earthy scent of roasted coffee beans heavily imbued the air, filling your nose with the aroma of something far more familiar.

Given it was the late afternoon, and most people tended not to drink caffeine after 2pm, the patrons were few and far in between. Good for you, at least. It meant you wouldn’t get- “Hawks? Sorry to bother you but can we get a picture?” your head turned at the voice that rung out.

Two high school girls stood to your left, hands clutched together in front of their chests and a dark pink coating their cheeks. With a small sigh, you took a step forward in the small queue. Hawks smiled with all the faux charm in the world, an obvious change in his demeanour as his pride spiked.

“Of course! And just as it happens, I have my personal photographer here who can make sure your photos look amazing as you two do!” it took you a moment to register what he had said through the excited squeals of the girls before he clutched your shoulders and pulled you forward, causing you to stumble slightly.

“Your what?” he sent you an audacious smirk, willing you to play along as one of the girls handed you her phone. Your first instinct was to decline, but as you met the eyes of the girls, so eager and bright, you couldn’t find it in you to disappoint them.

Taking a couple steps back, you lifted the phone, slightly angling it so the picture looked more natural, and not that of a celebrity and their fans (even if it was). You squinted angrily at the poor lighting, but tried to rectify it the best you could. The girls looked a little tense, but Hawks was a natural. A liberal smirk played on his lips and shoulders rolled back, relaxed. Even with the low lighting, the highlights on his cheekbone and jawline were indescribably perfect, and you weren’t sure if the credit should go to you or his god-like genes.

“Wow, that’s perfect!” one of the girls cried, her body appearing by your side. You hadn’t even noticed her moving, “thank you so much!” you just nodded, handing her back her phone and crossing your arms, eyes narrowing at Hawks.

“If that’s all, ladies, we best be ordering,” they nodded frantically at Hawks’ words, sharply bowing and spouting their thanks to the two of you countless times. They left the Starbucks, but even outside you could still hear them fawning over the picture. He faced you with a grin, but you couldn’t muster up a smile.

“Don’t go around telling people I’m your personal photographer,” you sneered. He pouted, looking genuinely disappointed for a second. “What, you don’t wanna be mine?” “Not in the slightest.”

“What will be your order, Miss?” the barista had directed the question at you, but it was clear his attention was elsewhere. You weren’t surprised, but a small swell of annoyance grew in your mind.

“Can I have a mocha with a double shot of expresso?” Hawks chuckled.

“Might as well have an expresso, you know. You’re basically just taking a shot of caffeine,” you shrugged.

“It’s my favourite drink. I like the chocolate taste,” he looked at you with round eyes, a small squeeze in his chest.

“And you, sir?”

“Oh, I’ll have the same, then,” he didn’t miss the way your eyes darted to him. The barista nodded, tapping for a couple seconds before turning back.

“That’ll be 660 yen,” “I’m paying,” Hawks blurted, even before you could offer. You were silent, a small nod in the affirmative rocking your head. As he handed over the bills, he chuckled. “You know, not that I mind, but usually couples would argue over who’s paying,” you rolled your eyes.

“We’re not a couple,” you watched the barista prepare your drinks, more of a way to occupy yourself rather than a genuine interest, “besides, you’re a lot richer than I am. I don’t mean to be impolite, but I’m sure you can lose 600 yen and still be good,” he hummed happily.

“No disagreements there.” “Are you two eating in or taking out?” the barista asked, in the midst of securing the plastic lids to the top of the cups. Hawks’ eyes sparkled as he turned to you with an excitement you assumed only appeared in children.

“Hey, we can-” “Take out,” you responded, giving a now deflated Hawks a challenging look, “I will leave you here if I have to.” the blonde grinned. “You wouldn’t. You need me for the pictures,” he sang, voice jovial.

“I don’t care about you that much. The sunflowers are probably less annoying subjects anyway,” oh. With no warning, his heart beat sped up, his wings puffing out slightly. Sure, he wouldn’t mind if you were a little nicer to him, but your insults were like a breath of fresh air. There was no doubt that Hawks loved the limelight, loved the popularity he got, but the relentless ass-kissing got old after a while. You kept him on his toes. Even if he was just constantly chasing after you every time you brushed him off, he didn’t care.

“Put those away, bird brain,” it was then he realised his wings had spread further than he intended, stretched out on either side of him. One was curled right around his face, and he almost felt himself blushing as he pulled them in. It was just animal instincts, he assured himself.

The rest of the journey was filled with a one-sided conversation of him talking and commenting on what was around you, with no response from you except the occasional witty retort or light-hearted jab at his expense, each one making his heart flutter. It wasn’t too long before you had arrived, the chain link fence around the plot stretching high above your head and corroded with orange rust.

Rows and rows of bright yellow sunflowers stretched to the horizon, an immense display of summer vitality. The fragrance was potent, a sort of cloying sweetness that you didn’t hate. And just as you were about to enter, you knew you had made a mistake.

“Oh.” Hawks stared at you incredulously, attention switching from your taken aback expression to the sign posted on the gate.

“You didn’t check to see it was open?” you looked up at him, allowing him to survey a tinge of remorse he hadn’t recognised until this point.

“Look, how was I supposed to know? This place has always been open at this time since I was a little kid,” you rubbed your arm, brows furrowed. Hawks sighed, rolling his shoulders back.

“Well, the sun’s too low to go anywhere else outside,” he shrugged, “it’s no biggie, I guess. Those other photos weren’t too bad. Hey, now that we’re free, do you want to- what are you doing?” your foot was halfway in the gaps in the gate, the wedges on your heels making it hard to climb.

“I’m not wasting my day for nothing,” you growled, fingers curling around the metal, “get climbing, bird boy,” with a soft sigh, smile gracing his lips and a warm feeling in his chest, Hawks spread his wings.

“I think you’re forgetting something that’ll make this a lot easier,” you felt a cool draft on your back as Hawks flapped his wings, the feeling being quickly replaced by the warmth of his chest as he pulled you in. A foreign emotion coiled in your stomach, but you convinced yourself that it was just the flight.

One arm wrapped around your shoulders, the other supporting your knees, and all Hawks was thinking that such a gentle flight never felt so calming.

Your feet tapped against the soft soil, sinking in to it slightly when the hero placed you down. You nodded your thanks.

“Let’s go over there, I want the sun coming in from the right,” Hawks nodded, content to just follow your orders. You pulled the tripod from your bag and set it up, adjusting it to your liking as Hawks looked around, trying to think of a pose.

Once everything was ready, you turned your attention to Hawks.

“I want to humanise you,” he grinned curiously as you walked over.

“What do you mean by that?” he nearly gasped when you grabbed his chin, angling his face to the side and slightly up, towards the sun. You took a step closer, reaching up and running a hand through his hair. He bit his lip, hands trembling as you tugged slightly, trying to mess it up a little.

“All the photos I’ve seen on you always put a huge emphasis on either your wings or your hero status, and I don’t really see why,” you mumbled, placing one hand on his jawline while the other fixed his hair to your liking, letting a few strands fall in front of his eyes, “I think that just creates a divide. If they wanted you to seem angelic they should play that up, not just have it the norm,” you huffed, “anyway, I wanna put the emphasis on you and not your wings. So ideally if you could tuck them behind your back that would be wonderful,”

Hawks nodded, disappointment filling him as you stepped away. He made sure not to move as he awkwardly folded his wings over each other and pulled them in, glancing at you with a look of apprehension. You just nodded in approval, leaning down to your camera.

You took plenty of shots, allowing him plenty more opportunities to feel your hands on him (and he would be lying if he said he didn’t enjoy it).

“Hey, why were you so late today?” Hawks dared to question while you were analysing your photos. You were perched on a bench, appreciating your work. The late sun cast a golden sheen on his skin, the spattering of glimmering rays highlighting his face in all the right places.

“I was sleeping,” you responded, deleting an out of focus shot. His eyes narrowed.

“What?” “Just as it sounds. Figured if they were gonna make me work so I could only have three hours of sleep a night it was gonna be on their time, not mine,” he frowned, taking a seat next to you.

“They shouldn’t work you that hard,” you shrugged with a hollow laugh, blank gaze in your eyes.

“What am I gonna do? Have them fire me? As much as I hate this job it’s the only thing that pays for my coffee in the morning,” he was silent as you stood up, stretching your arms behind your bag before tucking everything back in your bag.

“Did you want to be a photographer?” he questioned, only to be met with a forlorn smile.

“Maybe at one point.” the two of you lapsed into silence before you sighed.

“Well, I’ve gotta submit these to Mizuki, and I’m sure you need-” Hawks caught your wrist, spinning you back around.

In the glow of the sunset, you looked almost ethereal. Your eyes gleamed, and cheeks warmed in the orange flare. Sunflowers framed your form, and the words caught in his throat, nearly stopping him from saying anything at all.

“Come work for me.” he blurted. You snorted.

“No.” all he could do was smile as you hopped back over the fence, not waiting up for him.

“Yeah. That’s what I thought you’d say.”

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yyh4ever · 4 years ago

Photo

Togashi-sensei Direct Answer!

The secrets of "Yu☆Yu☆"!!

~In commemoration of the 3rd year of the serialization~

Source: Weekly Shounen JUMP N°3-4, 1994. Credits to @sinnasuk3 for the magazine photos.

Yusuke: "I’ve bumped into my creator, Togashi-sensei, and asked him the questions everyone wants to know about "Yu☆Yu☆". Here they are!!"

Q1. Is the hunter who chased Youko Kurama down from the Spirit World Special Defense Force - S.D.F?

A: That's right. It’s the "Special Defense Force" that came out in JUMP Nº2. There are nine members in the Special Defense Force, including Captain Otake, and one of them inflicted a serious wound on Youko Kurama fifteen years ago. That's...a secret...well, I wonder who he is?

T/N: Togashi was ironic at the end of his answer (I wonder who the guys is) and he probably didn’t want to give spoilers. In Chapter 149 ("Mano a Mano Again"), published in the previous issue of the magazine (WSJ N°2, 1994), Shunjun is bragging about how the S.D.F. can handle even A-class youkai. Then, Rinbai (dark-violet hair) brings up that he was tired of hearing Shunjun’s story about the day he pounced on Youko.

Q2. Who is the lady in black kimono who works under Koemma's command?

A: Her name is "Ayame" and she is Botan's junior (*kohai). Does she look a little older than Botan? For the time being, she’s still studying, so she’s active in the Spirit World working with focus on investigations.

Photo Caption: Researching about Toguro under Koenma’s orders. There’s a mature atmosphere, probably because of the black kimono.

T/N: In Japan, there’s the senpai-kohai (senior-junior) system. While senpai (先輩) means an upperclassman, senior employee or an older person, kohai (後輩) is the junior or lower person. Senpai-kohai is determined by age and rank. It’s funny, because I always thought Ayame was older than Botan. Even Togashi mentions she looks older.

Q3. Did Hiei really not know janken (rock-paper-scissors)?

A: Hmm...maybe he remembered the word "rock-paper-scissors" at the time of volume 7, but forgot it by volume 10...? Kuwabara also takes off his hat to Hiei, saying that “he's no ordinary guy”.

T/N:

- “He's no ordinary guy” are Kuwabara’s words to Hiei from volume 10. Kuwabara acknowledges Hiei’s abilities when he, who had never played janken before, realizes that Kuwabara was cheating at jaken.

- I explained the janken story here. In short, Hiei mentioned the janken game in volume 7, but had no idea what it was in volume 10. Togashi apologized for the mistake in a WSJ Table of Contents (the anime and some overseas editions of the manga fixed his line from volume 7).

Q4. Did Hagiri and Amanuma die!?

A: Please, take a closer look at "Yu Yu Hakusho" chapter in Jump Nº49, 1993 (Ch.144 "Unstoppable!!"). In fact, Amanuma is present in a certain scene. Fufufu, which scene is it?...Which means that Hagiri is... also?

T/N: Chapter 150 "An Unparalleled Battle!!" came out when this Q&A was published in JUMP N°3-4, 1994. Yusuke had just arrived in the Demon World to fight Sensui, so people still didn’t know what had happened with Amanuma and Kaname. That’s the reason of this question. But, if you take a closer look at chapter 144, you can spot Amanuma standing behind Botan and the others, almost hidden behind a balloon. However, we only learned that Koenma used the mafuukan to save him a few chapters later.

Source: Weekly Shounen Jump Nº49 (1993) or volume 16, p.115 (Chapter 144).

Q5. What was the other opponent on whom Koenma used the "mafuukan” in the past?

A: Let's have the person himself to answer this question.

Koenma: "Wooow, I forgot. It was certainly against a youkai, I think...Don't blame me. If you live for hundreds of years, this can happen!"

Q6. Please tell us more about the first Spirit World detective.

A: Her name is Kuroko Sanada. She is a descendant of onmyoji who performed spells. She worked as a Spirit World detective for six years, solving more than ten cases, but retired when she got married. She is now mother of two children. Occasionally, demons will bother her, but she says her two children will get rid of them...

Photo Caption: Sensui from the second generation was also excellent.

Q7. Is Kurama going to tell Kuwabara the name of Hiei's younger sister?

A: This is also a question to the person himself...

Kurama: "Such an funny thing...there’s no way I could tell him, right? It’s obvious. I’m going to delay it. Nihihi”.

That’s right.

This JUMP issue also announced the “Poltergeist Report Movie” to the Spring of 1994 and was one of the main sources to the “Yu Yu Hakusho Character Book Reikai Shinshiroku” (2005). I translated the other articles from this magazine in the past, together with additional info from the databook, here follows the links:

Botan's Assault Interview! The Secrets of the "Yu Yu" Four Warriors

Botan interviews the 4 guys (Official Character Book version)

Sensui’s 7 personalities

Togashi comments about Kido, Kaitou, Yanagisawa and Murota

Togashi comments about Itsuki, Dr. Kamiya, Mitarai, Hagiri, Amanuma and Makihara

Yusuke, Kurama, Hiei and Kuwabara choose their 3 Best Matches

Promotion of The “Poltergeist Report” Movie

Lastly, Togashi’s random comment for the Table of Contents:

“Right now, the temperature difference between the outside and in the room is over 20℃. I hated summer, but I also hated winter. Spring, come soon...” (Yoshihiro Togashi)

Weekly Shounen JUMP N°3-4, 1994

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gojology · 4 years ago

Text

The Start of Winter Break. (18+)

𝑨𝒖𝒕𝒉𝒐𝒓'𝒔 𝑵𝒐𝒕𝒆 | I FEEL RLLY SAD CUZ I WANTED TO DO THE SUKUNA BUT I DONT KNOW THE STORY ON ALADDIN SO I OPTED FOR 2 INSTEAD IM SORRY ANON. anyways i wanted to feed u guys rlly well and actually took the time to write and edit. I’M REFORMED also writing on google docs is so hard?? (reposting cuz i think im shadowbanned)

𝑷𝒂𝒊𝒓𝒊𝒏𝒈 | Gojo Satoru x Female Reader

𝑾𝒐𝒓𝒅 𝑪𝒐𝒖𝒏𝒕 | 3798

𝑾𝒂𝒓𝒏𝒊𝒏𝒈𝒔 | Food Play, Nipple Play, Oral (Fem Receiving), Degrading Nicknames (I didn’t really proof read that hard but I know there’s like, a mention of one nickname along the lines of that.)

𝑺𝒖𝒎𝒎𝒂𝒓𝒚 | It’s the first day of Winter Break, and you want to surprise Gojo with a cup of hot cocoa, instead, Gojo surprises you. Blinking your eyes furiously, you adjusted to the dark room. Immediately, you breathe a sigh of relief. You didn’t have to wake up at such an early hour, and for once you woke up refreshed. It was finally the first day of Winter Break, you had overworked yourself, making sure that you were to spend the end of the year work-free and available for as many Christmas parties you wanted to attend. Yawning, stretching as you did so, you look over your shoulder. There’s a slight smile dawning on Gojo’s lips. His long eyelashes fluttered when he slept. He slightly snored, grabbing at where you once slept in his arms. The room was unusually cold. You had always awoke to sunlight streaming from the window, realizing that could only mean that another day of work was ahead of you. But now, the room was dim, and freezing might you add. You couldn’t wait to snuggle with Gojo, this was perfect cuddle weather. Tearing your eyes away from Gojo’s pretty face, you instead looked at the door. Years of photos with Gojo absolutely slathered the poor thing, past memories all flickering before your eyes. Pictures in Disneyland, bright colors in contrast with the rather dark clothes he always seemed to wear. Once in a while, you would see pictures of Yuuji, Shoko, Megumi, Nobara, just about every Tokyo Jujutsu Tech School member there was, and even Utahime, celebrating good times with Gojo. You didn’t find yourself in many of the pictures, but the ones you did find yourself happened to be some of your fondest memories. Far more common were pictures of you, with ridiculous, shit, you’d even go as far as to say downright ugly faces while he told you a stupid joke were also taped sloppily, some photos were even slanted. Gojo had made it a firm promise to take pictures of you when you least expected it, because that’s when he always found you the cutest. You peek at Gojo’s sleeping face once more, a slight giggle rising from your throat that you struggled to silence. His mouth, slightly agape, was now drooling onto the pillow he oh so gracefully rested on. Jerking your head up and snapping out of your Gojo daze, you realized that you were supposed to make your daily morning coffee for you and him today. You had chewed him out multiple times, telling him that the way he made coffee was nauseating. Usually, Gojo would always accompany the bitter drink with 8 sugarcubes, which was not your thing. He always seemed to forget, honestly you couldn’t really tell with him, giving you a mug of absurdly sweetened coffee every morning. You always foolishly assumed that he had listened to you from the last scolding, so you would always sip it, letting the coffee coat your pallet, but promptly spit it out as soon as you realized how sickly sweet it was. “Satoru! This is too sweet!” “Honeybun, you’re the sweetest thing in this room, what do you mean the coffee could be too sweet? Not possible.” he would inquire innocently, tilting his head to the side. You’d frown, shaking your head and muttering about the acts of distaste you’d do to him before Gojo bursts into a fit of laughter, pointing at you and watching you unenthusiastically look back. Most likely fuming silently, but you didn’t want to tell him that. “You’re so fucking cute when you’re angry, (Y/N).” “Satoru, I can literally not survive the day without coffee. Whatever you’re serving me is definitely not the coffee I want, and sooner or later I’ll be dropping dead.” He would shrug playfully, as if he didn’t even understand the core concepts of what you were trying to tell him. But you knew he did, he just didn’t want to do it. You would clench your fists, trying to look threatening. Your back straightening, and on your tippy toes even though you knew you could never be as tall as him. It never ever worked though, he would just continue to laugh harder, but that was just the routine. “Then do it yourself, sweetie. I wake up at the asscrack of dawn just to make you a cup of coffee. I don’t know about you, but that’s the best show of love.” “Oh I will. I’ll do it well.” And so, you weren’t lying. The two of you began to take turns. You woke up even earlier than you did for work, and made him his coffee (with extra sugar, just as he likes it) while also making yours, making sure to relish the bitter and frankly delicious black drink, void of any sweetening. The next day, he would as well. He never listened to your sugar lectures though, making sure to add 3-4 cubes just to make you angry. You had pretty much given up on all hope of ever getting your ideal coffee from Satoru, it was beyond him to even listen. Besides, you had grown to like the sweetness. Speaking of brown sweet liquids, it was a perfect hot cocoa morning. The snow was beginning to pile up outside, pure white blanketing just about everything. You hastily threw on an oversized sweater Gojo owned, which you had found strewn on the ground. You rolled your eyes, that guy was a mess. What would he do without you? Trudging and stumbling your way into the kitchen like a newborn fawn, you flicked on the lights. As soon as the lights came on, you shielded your eyes from the brightness. Cursing as you pulled out a chair, your eyes slowly adjusting, pulling the chair over to the shelves and cabinets out of reach. Now standing on the wooden chair, you grumbled. So much for being a good girlfriend, your legs ached for some reason, so every time you stood on your tippy toes, you winced. Knocking down a bottle of vegetable oil into the sink, you were startled by such an incredibly loud noise. Your eyes widen and your legs tangle as you scramble, almost falling backwards. Grabbing onto the cabinet’s ledge, you breathed a sigh of relief as the chair stabilized. This was a blessing in disguise, as the chocolate syrup came into view. A feeling of triumph flooding you, you happily hummed gently pulling it out. Setting it down on the counter, you got down, moving the chair over to the right. Standing back onto the chair, you placed a finger on your lips, slightly rubbing them. Your memory wasn’t doing you very well, forgetting where all the extra add-ons for baked goods were. Your tongue stuck out to the side, swinging a random cabinet’s doors wide open. You had guessed correctly, sprinkles of various vivid colors stood idly, eye-catching colors on full display. A fine coat of dust had settled on the caps. You coughed into your arm, now rummaging through the many sprinkles that Gojo would insist on buying because, “they were too cute to pass up.” Sometimes, you swore the guy was a middle-aged Pinterest mom. Yanking out a half opened bag of Jumbo Marshmallows, you did a small victory dance. Normally, Gojo would inhale the darned things, but he was asleep, and very soundly at that. Finally able to have your first taste of marshmallows in a while, you popped a couple in your mouth, practically melting. So sweet. Strolling over to the fridge while popping more marshmallows in your mouth, you lazily threw the bag onto the counter. Swinging the fridge door wide open, you shivered at the cold air, hauling a jug of milk out. As usual, it was half full. Gojo would insist on eating all his cookies with milk, and if he didn’t have milk with his cookies, he would not eat them, stating that it was against his beliefs to even begin to stare at a cookie without a cold glass of milk at the side. He was probably a 9 year old trapped in a 28 year olds body. Humming a short tune, you poured the milk into a mug that Gojo had bought for you as a souvenir on a business trip. Painted onto it was a beautiful scene. Flourishing, vibrant flowers only half-heartedly concealing an undisturbed pond, deers frolicking around it. The mug was your favorite cup, and even Gojo, who most likely had the memory span of a goldfish when it came to unnecessary facts such as this one, knew it. You flipped the chocolate syrup bottle upside down, smacking the top. Making a note to yourself to buy chocolate syrup the next time you went out. Strong arms wrapped around your waist, pulling you in closer. “Boo.” Startled, you twirled around, expecting a rather friendly home invader, or something along the lines of that. Instead, you were greeted with Gojo Satoru’s face. Satoru’s eyebrow twitches, looking at you with an amused expression. “Scared? We’re on the same boat.” he snickered, “woke up to some loud ass bang.” Gojo sleepy whispered into your ear, ruffling your hair with his large, calloused hands. His chin now resting on your right shoulder. “I dropped the vegetable oil on accident.” You ignored the light, fluttering feeling when he touched you. “Gosh, you’re a clumsy one aren’t you, sugar?” Scoffing, you whip your head back to the hot chocolate. An unhealthy serving of chocolate syrup was splattered inside the mug, already blending with the milk. “Don’t turn your back on me, pumpkin.” whining playfully, tugging at your left shoulder. There was something about such a playful, childish Gojo that you loved. You wished you got to see it more often. You pretend to be annoyed, looking at him, now standing up without the support of your shoulder, in the eye now. A flicker of mischievousness over his face, he looks down at you. “How thoughtful.” kissing your temple, he yawned. “Making hot chocolate for me? Oh hey- you even got the exact same amount of chocolate I like.” “Satoru.” hands on your hips, you were bemused. How could one even like sugar this much? “This is an ungodly amount of chocolate syrup, and can NOT be good for you.” His warm gaze stared back, a slight curve to his lips now. You swear you could die a happy girl now, Gojo wasn’t sleepy very often, so when he was, you made sure to relish it. Usually, when you were lucky enough to be in the presence of a sleepy Gojo, he was always softer. Giving you small, coy smiles. Your retort didn’t even seem to register in his brain in the slightest. “I want it, though.” You sighed, facepalming. “Ooooh, marshmallows!” suddenly bursting with energy he never exhibited before seeing the sugary treat, his long arm extended over to the bag, tugging at it to get it closer to him before finally shoving 3 or more into his mouth. “Satoru!” you yank his hand back from the entrance of his mouth, able to save a few, albeit a bit ugly and smooshed, marshmallows. “Wha?” he rubbed his eyes, chewing noisily on the marshmallows he was lucky enough to get into his mouth. “Baby. We need those marshmallows, here, can you microwave a bowl of them? Save a few for later.” He nodded obediently, tugging a bowl out of the “washed dishes” section of the sink. Wiping it down sloppily with a towel. He dug his hand into the marshmallow bag, throwing a few handfuls into the bowl before carefully placing the bowl into a microwave, sneaking a few more into his mouth before jabbing at a few buttons. “There.” he gave you a crooked grin and a thumbs up, walking back over to you, placing warm fingers against your cheek, suddenly jumping back. “Holy shit, babygirl, you’re cold.” About to respond, you too realized how cold you were. Lightly shivering, your hands seemed to be blocks of ice. “Babe, can you go get an extra sweater-” Hands under your sweater (well, technically his) suddenly, his warm, big hands massaged your breasts. You yelped, the hot contact against your cold skin was electrifying. His thumbs, rubbing over your nipples lazily, sent even more shivers down your spine. Quietly moaning, you looked back at Gojo, who seemed to thoroughly savor every little sound you made. “Like that, lil girl~?” “S-Satoru! Not now… I’m making you s-something!” “Hot cocoa doesn’t take a chef to make.” he placed kisses on your neck, lightly suckling on your bare skin. “I-I know, but just… N-not now.” you stammered, he was now tweaking your nipples, gently pulling them. He didn’t seem to register the request though, but instead was drawing lazily on your breast. “That better, missy?” he questioned, watching you catch your breath and gulp. Resting his chin on your shoulder once more. “Mmmmm.” you responded, thoroughly enjoying his warm touch. Closing your eyes, enjoying the mystifying feeling his hands always gave you. Loudly, the microwave beeped. Suddenly jumping up from the loud occurrence, Gojo cursed under his breath and jogged over to the microwave, swinging the handle open. “Great news, (Y/N). I didn’t burn the marshmallows!” Grumbling under your breath, and wishing all hell to the microwave for disrupting such an intimate event, you nodded, giving him a few weak claps for his rather stupid achievement. Gesturing for him to bring the bowl over, you pulled out a spoon from the drawer beneath you. As soon as Gojo placed the bowl on the counter, he zoomed back to where he had left off, grabbing one of your breasts and squeezing it. This time, he was massaging one of your shoulders. Your breathing was heavier when he did this, Gojo noted, watching as you struggled to mix the chocolate syrup and milk together. He did this for a while, eyeing the cooling marshmallow. He swiped up a dollop, wiping it down your neck. Letting out a gasp by the sudden warmth, you assumed it was Gojo’s mouth. To your surprise, it wasn’t. He licked the cloud of fluff, before straight up placing his entire mouth on it, lightly sucking and licking your skin. Your panties were getting awfully wet. “L-love, we n-need the fluff to a-add the finishing touch to t-the hot cocoa.” you would mutter, trying not to collapse from the pleasure. “You getting wet?” now lightly nibbling on your skin, his hand left your breast, dunking his hand underneath the fabric of your panties. He sneered, realizing the puddle that had seeped itself into the material. “Aw, you’re absolutely wet. Fuck am I saying?” he swirled his finger around your entrance, lightly dipping one of his fingers in before he took it out. Whimpering, your walls clenched around something that wasn’t there. “Anyways, let's get back to the hot cocoa!” innocently licking his glistening finger, he looked at you. ‘What? Y-you can’t do that to me-!” “Isn’t that what you wanted?” he chirped back, smiling devilishly. “That’s what I wanted before-” “Hush up, slut.” he rubbed your head with one hand, the other, stroking your cheek. You didn’t realize how hot you got when he called you a slut, whimpering, the hot cocoa long forgotten on the counter as you leaned into his chest. “Aw, you’re so cute.” tugging on your cheeks softly, you look up at him, while he looked down. Even though you were his girlfriend, you didn’t really see his eyes often. They were a brilliant shade of aquamarine, flecks of a darker blue were also sprinkled amongst the sea of various shades of blue. “You want something? You’re giving me those puppy eyes.” Still pulling at your cheeks, he stared down patiently, unable to hide the smile on his face. “I hate when you tease me.” you blurt out, surprisingly coherent, even though Gojo was pinching your cheek. Another flicker of amusement on his face. “That’s not how you ask for something you want.” He stopped pinching your cheeks, now staring at you. You couldn’t quite tell what he was thinking about, his face was blank, eyes cloudy. “Mmm, I’ll give you one last chance before you get punished. Now missy, what do you want?” You tugged at the hem of his pants, still making eye contact. “You can’t have that, sweetie.” he straightened you back up, so that you weren’t leaning on his chest any longer. “It’s way too early.” “Then what was the point of teasing me?” you groaned, clasping your hands together and looking at him. “Please?” you were sure to have your eyelashes flutter. He laughed, shaking his head. “Sorry, princess.” You groaned, getting down onto the cold floor, getting onto your knees, looking at his pleasurably entertained face. “...What about now?” He chuckled, rubbing your head again. “No, baby. I’m just not in the mood, but I can make a recommendation that works with me. Although, you’re really cute when you’re on your knees for me.” You nodded, nervously anticipating whatever he wanted to do. You didn’t need to wait, though, he carried you over to the table, like a princess, unclothing you quickly. Throwing his sweater onto the floor once again, you felt your heart jump a little. A small pile of clothing consisting of the sweater, your panties, and a t-shirt was crumpled up on the floor. He cupped your breasts, leaning over the table to look at them. His expression softened, placing delicate kisses on each breast, making you gasp a little. “So cute.” whispering, rubbing your nipples once again. Your hands found their home in Gojo’s hair, now clenching onto his snowy white locks. He grunted a little as you pushed his head further into your chest, effectively telling you to start suckling on the now slightly abused domes. “Just a sec, (Y/N).” extending his impossibly long limbs to grab the marshmallow fluff bowl, his long fingers danced at the rim, then pulled it closer to his chest. Yanking the spoon out of the bowl, he spread the lukewarm fluff on your body, you weren’t expecting such warmth, and you let out a yelp, realizing what he was slathering onto you. “Satoru! D-did you forget what I said e-earlier?” “Nope, I just don’t care.” sadistically grinning, he ducked his head down, the space between your breasts and his face non existent. He had practically smooshed himself into your embrace, your arms around his head. He was good with his tongue, you had to admit, too good. Goosebumps grew on your skin, no matter how many times you two fucked senseless, he still had such an effect on you. His tongue swirling around your nipple, fingers rubbing and teasing the other. You felt his hot breath against your skin, and you couldn’t help but think how good it felt. Strands of hair tickled you as he began to noisily slurp, before coming back up again. Your breast was glistening with spit, few thin lines of marshmallow fluff left over. He licked them up, before scooping up a few dollops of marshmallow fluff onto you, looking hungrily at the attention-starved breast, before diving back down. Fingers now giving the spoiled nipple almost close to 0 action. He licked the hard nipple a few more times before sucking onto it, as if he was a baby. I mean, he probably was. Afterall, he was a manchild. Regardless, you found yourself heavily breathing, hugging his head like it was the last thing you’d ever do. His teeth lightly nibbled, making you jump a little. Now biting onto it, you squealed. He glanced up, before going back down, licking the sensitive bud. You felt a rush near your lower regions, a familiar warmth rushed to your cheeks. “S-Satoru! I think I’m gonna-!” You weren’t even going to finish the sentence, the white, hot liquid pooling out of you as soon as you uttered a few words. Gojo’s attention was now focused on you, before looking down. “Woah, lil girl. That’s a large mess. I didn’t know your pussy needed any attention.” he directed his gaze towards your pussy, spreading the folds and softly examined it. “How pretty.” he muttered, he flicked his thumb on your clit, making you moan loudly. “FUCK!” you threw a hand over your mouth, he laughed, his breath tickling you. “You’re really wet.” Without any warning before hand, he dove in between your legs, beginning to noisily slurp at your folds, dipping his tongue into your entrance. You began to practically scream louder, you were fuzzy, your body, your mind, everything. Unable to cover your moans, you began to grimace at the stares your neighbors would give you when you went out for the mail. Gojo would laugh, telling you that, “He was just trying to show the world you were his.” and not pay any mind, cursing him for being so skilled, you struggled to contain all the noises you were making. You felt his tongue tease your entrance playfully, flicking your clit a few times for extra measure, you were now wildly thrashing, and you knew Gojo couldn’t wait to ridicule you over dinner. About to straight up shove his head closer into you, his tongue finally stuck inside of you. Letting out a sigh of relief mixed with added pleasure, he skillfully lapped at your juices. Noisily slurping away at you, he glanced up. You were trying to sit up, but were struggling as you did so. The waves of pleasure sent you crashing back down onto the table. You felt him exhale through his nose, tickling you once again. He closed the little space between you and his face, as soon as he was in contact with your skin, you wrapped your legs around his back, trying to close the distance that wasn’t there. Now, his tongue was reaching you in places you’d never think he would. Flush, hot skin was sweating against the table surface, but you paid no mind, promising yourself to wipe the top later. Hair strands practically glued to the sides of your head due to the sweat, you whined again, feeling yourself close to cumming. You were about to speak again, warning Gojo, but you couldn’t. Before the words could even spill out of your mouth, you felt yourself burst. Gojo, seemingly unaware, was still lapping at your walls. You looked at him, breathing heavily. His eyes widened, and you felt him stop licking for a while, before you saw him gulp and stand back up. His eyes twinkled a little in the light, and you straightened, sitting on the table, your heart still beating rapidly. “You never told me you were gonna cum.” You turned your head to the side, about to retort, before you realized the empty bowl of marshmallow fluff. “Satoru! I told you to not use it all!” (resposting because i think im shadowbanned, please interact if u saw this!)

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