#I guess I just would have assumed I’d feel more confident about all of this at my age :/

[inga-don-studio]

New job jitters never really go away, do they?

Sunday was my last shift at the job I've been trying to get away from for over a year & a half, and today I start a new (but in the same field) job at a place I've been trying to get my foot-in-the-door for just as long lol.

Technically I'm ridiculously experienced in what I'm going to be doing starting out, but HA HA OH BOY that really doesn't reassure the anxiety brain gremlins.

[whimsyfinny]

Pairing: Dean Winchester x Reader

Summary: Charlie discovers the Winchester boys to be struggling with keeping the bunker tidy, looking after themselves and being able to do their job simultaneously. Luckily she has a friend who’s from a Hunter family that is in need of work and can help them with research. Or so she thought that’s what her job would be. When Dean sees your more domesticated side, his head won’t stop swimming with all the wrong ideas.

Slow burn, enemies to lovers, smut

Warnings: language, angst, depictions of blood

Chapter Word Count: 3327

—-MDNI—-

A/N: soooo this chapter felt weird to write, but hey I wanted it for the plot to thicken haha. It’s different, but things will feel a bit more normal after this chapter.

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Please read the below:

Prologue Chapter 1

Chapter 2 Chapter 3

Chapter 4 Chapter 5

Chapter 6 Chapter 7

Chapter 8pt.1

Chapter 8pt.2

Chapter 9 Chapter 10

I’m Not Your F*cking Maid

Chapter 11

By the time I’d passed the security check, introduced myself to the two other girls currently on shift and found my dressing room, the nerves were starting to dissipate. Through each step and each new room I’d entered I was making countless mental notes on every security camera and exit I could see. It wasn’t hard to tell that everyone except the bar and wait staff and the dancers were all vampires - their noses twitching and eyes widening whenever I’d walked past. I was clearly fresh meat - perhaps not in the immediate future, but I’m guessing that as soon as I’d served my purpose in luring unknowing human men to their untimely demise, I’d be next. Or at least kept as a blood bag, and I didn’t know which was worse.

A sharp knock on the door brought me back to reality, the vamp on the other side not even waiting for a reply as he barged in.

“You’re sure taking your time sweet cheeks, everything ok?” His sharp gaze twinkled as he looked at me, as if searching for any sort of vulnerability. I huffed out a final deep breath of nerves before standing straight and forcing a smile, shimmying out of my thick overcoat and throwing it over the back of the chair I was just leaning on. On the revelation of my figure and my outfit he let out a long, low whistle.

“Well don’t you just look good enough to eat?”

I swallowed despite my mouth being dry, trying my best to bring my confidence to the forefront and to ignore what he is.

“Well you wouldn’t be the first to say so,” I almost felt nauseous from having to sound so sweet. “Why don’t you lead the way and show me where I’m supposed to be?”

He didn’t take any convincing as he led me out the room and down a short corridor that was lined with what I’m assuming are other dressing rooms.

“What’s in there?” I asked, my gaze snagging on a metal door that didn’t look like the rest. It looked more like a vault, with an intricate lock system that seemed to need both keys and fingerprints.

“Errrrr, just the boss's office. Nothing to worry your pretty little head about,” he placed his hand on my hair, making me shudder.

“Oh ok… will I ever get to meet the boss?” I asked, tilting my head to the side. Keeping up with this cutie-pie act was going to be more draining than I thought. He stayed quiet for a moment before speaking up, an unsettling look on his face.

“Of course doll face! When the time is right.”

*

About two hours had passed since I arrived at the club and a steady stream of men (occasionally women) was filtering in. I was currently up on a podium and trying not to think too hard about how I should be dancing whilst keeping my eyes peeled on the crowd, every now and then making eye contact with the patrons and blowing them a sickening kiss with a sultry wink. Every time I slipped away for a ‘toilet break’ I'd unlock as many windows and doors as I could find whilst turning security cameras towards the wall. I'd counted around fifteen vampires milling around as I snuck about, and there were definitely more behind that metal door. This place was about as prepared as possible for Sam and Dean to sneak in, so I sent Charlie a text with all the details I had knowing full well she could no longer see me through the cameras she'd hacked into.

I'd been back on my podium for about ten minutes, moving my body to the loud bass of the blaring music under the erotic lighting which glowed all manner of pinks and reds, when the front door opened again to let another patron in. Except this wasn't a patron.

It was Dean.

I cursed under my breath, frowning at him across the dance floor despite the fact he hadn't seen me yet. What the actual fuck was he doing coming in through the front door? I didn't play mission impossible and find countless ways for him to break in just so that he could waltz in, bold as brass and blow our cover. I watched him as he stopped in the centre of the room, illuminated by the lights that cast angular shadows over his rugged face. He was alert, jaw clenched and eyes scouring the crowd until his gaze eventually landed on me. With my arms above my head and gripping the pole behind me he was able to get a good look at what was hiding underneath my overcoat when he last saw me. Eyes glazing over and Adam's apple bobbing, he was instantly ensnared. I focused entirely on him; sinking to my knees and crawling my hands forwards, beckoning him with a single finger to which he eagerly obliged. The older Winchester stood before me, eyes almost sparkling from the lustful lighting as he gaped up at me. His evergreen eyes shone in adoration as they bore into mine, almost completely disregarding the lasciviousness of the rest of my body. It was almost…

Romantic.

I leant forwards, my painted lips brushing against his ear and pulling a shiver from his spine. I could have been mistaken, but I’m sure I heard a groan.

“What the FUCK are you doing here, Dean?”

He blinked, suddenly remembering he was on earth.

“What?”

“The plan! What happened to the plan? You were supposed to go around the back - I made it easy for you to sneak in! This place is well guarded Dean.”

“Yeah well, I wanted to make sure you were- hang on- are you a MAID?” He stepped back to take a better look at me as I sat up, trying not to draw attention to myself for staying still for too long. My eyes rolled on their own accord.

“Dean now really isn’t the tim-”

“Holy crap you’re a maid. You’re a MAID. So there is a God,” he dramatically put his hands together as though in prayer and mouthed ‘thank you’ to the disco ball on the ceiling.

“Dean-”

“Nuh-uh, I’m not letting anyone ruin this for me - not even you. Carry on, pretend I’m not Dean and there aren’t any vamps to kill; just for two minutes,” he settled into one of the chairs in front of my podium, flagging a waitress down for a whiskey in the process. There was no arguing with Dean Winchester, especially when he was ticking something off his bucket list. Grasping the pole behind me I pulled myself to my feet, hooking my leg around it and spinning slowly.

“So, NOT-Dean, where’s not-Sam?”

He took a long sip from his liquor before licking his lips, his eyes transfixed on my thighs.

“He's uhhh…. He's sneaking in through some window round the back.”

“Oh, so like you should be?”

He smirked over the top of his glass, spreading his legs a little wider as he settled further into his chair, his other hand resting in his lap.

“Don't deny a man his pleasures sweetheart.”

A half hearted scoff left my lips before I climbed higher on the pole, leaning back so I was almost upside down, granting Dean the perfect view of my lingerie as my micro-skirt flipped over my belly. Spinning slightly, I caught him adjusting himself in his jeans right as I pulled myself back upright.

“You seem pretty at home in a strip club,” my voice came out more breathy than intended as I moved my body in time with the music.

“I can say the same about you,” he quipped back, dark eyes burning into my exposed skin. Licking the last drop of whiskey from his bottom lip, he placed his glass back on the table before standing; taking long, slow steps towards my podium, the toes of his boots touching the metal. I got down on my knees, bringing myself to his eye level before taking his chin between my thumb and index finger and drawing his bewitched face nearer. We ignored the shouts from security telling Dean he wasn’t allowed to touch as I ghosted my lips over his. I could feel his chest rising and falling in anticipation for a simple kiss, his mouth agape and eyes darting about my features - trying to take all of me in. His restraint snapped and he leant forward, pressing his mouth to mine - hot and needy. A large hand reached up and long fingers wrapped around my wrist, rough skin tickling at my pulse as he guided my hand from his chin to his hair, urging me to grip it. Just as I grasped at its softness he was forced away from me, two of the vamps shoving aggressively at his shoulders and putting some distance between us.

“Keep your hands off the girls! You know the rules,” one of them practically spat out his words to Dean, who in return had a feral look in his eye as I caught his hand inching closer and closer to the blade concealed within his jacket.

“Sorry it was my fault!” I blurted, all eyes now burning into me. “It's my first shift and I forgot I shouldn't let it get that far. Don't blame him, it was me who was too…. encouraging.” I flashed sickly-sweet doe eyes at the vamp sizing up Dean, biting my lip in apprehension before he sighed and let go, shaking his head.

“I’ll let you off this time as you’re the newbie, but don’t let it happen again.”

“Yes’sir!” I tapped my fingers to my forehead in a pretend salute, hearing the fanged ones curse under their breath before walking away, throwing one last warning look at Dean - who looked like the cat that got the cream - before returning to their posts. When I knew that they were definitely out of earshot, I snapped at Dean.

“You could’ve totally blown everything!”

Shrug.

“But I didn’t.”

“Dean, you need to go. Sam is going to be wondering where you are. Find him before you get caught.”

“And what about you?” He chewed his lip, unable to stop his eyes from wandering.

“I’m going to stay here and stick to the plan. I’ll run at the first sign of trouble, so please don’t worry about me,” I sighed, looking down at his puppy-dog eyes.

“(Y/n) I’m always gonna worry about you.”

*

It must have been about twenty minutes since Dean left to find Sam and my heart was pounding in my chest knowing how close they were and the possible danger they were in. I didn’t know what doors they were behind, or how many vamps they’d taken out, and I certainly didn’t know if they were unharmed. My palms felt sweaty on the pole as I danced, making it hard for me to grip and put on a good show. Now was as good a time as any to have a toilet break and grab some coffee. I hopped down from my podium as the song ended and hurried to the back of the club, darting through a ‘staff only’ door to the break room. I poured myself a small cup of coffee, adding an obscene amount of sugar to stop my knees from trembling. I’d barely swallowed my first mouthful when I heard shouts and crashing from down the hall, my fingers instantly loosening from the mug as my high-heeled feet carried me to the door where I peaked out, desperate to know what was going on yet mindful not to be seen. There was no one in the corridor that I could see, yet I checked left and right to make sure I wasn’t being watched before I slipped out, teetering on my platforms as I tiptoed to where I was sure the noise had come from.

It was the metal door.

I poked my head down the corridor where it was located and was grateful to see it unlocked and sitting ajar. Inching closer I could hear a scuffle from within and the sound of heavy bodies dropping like lead to the floor, followed by Sam and Deans unintelligible murmuring. A sigh of relief left my lips when I heard them, knowing it wasn’t their bodies hitting the cold tiles below. That relief froze in my veins however when I heard a third voice speak up. A voice that was smooth like butter. A voice that drew you in with a silky southern accent.

A voice that I knew to be dead.

Hesitation and reasoning left in the dust, I barged forwards and into the room, shoving the metal door wide and startling the Winchester brothers, their eyes widening at my sudden appearance. Before they even had the chance to open their mouths, slow clapping echoed through the ‘old money’ style office, emanating from behind a large mahogany desk.

“And there she is! The star of my show. It’s about time you showed up darlin’,” that southern voice dripped with charisma as a handsome man, around my age, sat in a crisp stone-coloured, three piece suit.

“Hey! Don’t you talk to her, you’re dealing with us,” Dean was quick to bite. The stranger threw him a sharp glare before rising to his feet, his cold gaze landed on me again and burned me through to my very soul.

“Y-y-you’re de-” I started before being immediately cut off.

“I bet you never thought you’d see me again, hm? Especially not like this,” he gestured to himself.

“(Y/n),” Sam’s cautious eyes landed on mine, “how do you know him? He’s a vampire.”

I opened my mouth to reply, but yet again I was interrupted before a sound passed my lips.

“Oh (Y/n) and I go waaaaaaaay back, don’t we darlin’?”

I could see Dean inching closer to me out of the corner of my eye, trying not to draw attention to himself in the process. I opened my mouth to speak again, my lips and tongue feeling dry and numb, like they didn’t want to utter the word about to be spoken.

“Daniel I-”

“BINGO!” He clapped loudly, “she DOES remember her old sweetheart.”

“WHAT!?” Both Sam and Dean spun to look at me with dumbfounded expressions, a whole array of emotions flitting across their features.

“(Y/n) you dated a vamp?” Sam asked, those big eyes of his glistening with concern.

“He wasn’t a vamp when I knew him; he’s supposed to be dead!” I turned from Sam to Daniel, the confusion clearly evident on my face, “you’re supposed to be dead - I watched you die - how are you here?”

A harsh laugh rippled from his chest.

“Paramedic was a vampire sweet-cheeks. He turned me on the way to the morgue after he pronounced me dead at the scene - stroke of genius really. Although,” he paused, walking around the desk to step towards me, the boys reaching for every weapon on their person to have at the ready, “what’s even more genius is that ad we put out for a dancer.”

“What?”

He scoffed.

“You think it’s a stroke of good luck that you just happen to look exactly like the description we posted? Honey I knew from the moment I turned what you and your uncle did for living - the dots seemed to connect all on their own. And I knew that one day - whether now or in a few years - that you or some other hunter you might know would pass through my nest and see it. I knew it would bring you back to me.”

“Whoa whoa whoa, hang on their sparkles; she’s not going anywhere with you,” Dean had pushed his way in between me and Daniel, the eldest Winchester standing a few inches taller than him as they went nose-to-nose.

Daniel grimaced, fangs threatening to show.

“Why is her scent all over you? Don’t tell me you two are involved?”

Dean smirked before I shoved him out the way, his thick fingers protectively wrapping around my wrist as a safety line.

“Daniel I-,” I took a deep breath, “I loved you once. A long, long time ago. But to me, in my world; you died. And I grieved you. God I grieved you for years, and then one day I woke up and my heart didn’t hurt as much anymore. I carried on with my life, the heartache easing a little everyday. Until there was no more heartache - no more pain. I was whole again. Daniel - you’re still dead in my world. Nothing is going to change.”

He reached for my hand but Dean put an arm between us, stopping him in his tracks.

“(Y/n), darlin’, I put that ad out because I still love you. We can still be together - forever. Just let me turn you-”

“Aannnd that’s it loverboy, times up,” Dean pushed me behind him and brandished the hunting blade he’d use to slice my underwear from my body about a week ago on our first hunt together. Right as Daniel bared his fangs and lunged for Dean, I felt another hand grab my arm. I spun and came toe-to-toe with Sam who was quietly beckoning for me to follow him whilst the vampire was distracted. We left the room quietly, running down corridors, twisting and turning and falling through one of the side doors I had unlocked earlier in the night and out into the fresh air. I took a few deep breaths, not realising how much the metallic scent of blood had filled my nostrils.

“Sam what about Dean?! We can't just leave him behind he-”

Sam laughed softly.

“If you want a vamp dead, Dean will always come out on top. He'll be just fine.”

Sam helped me to my feet, looking down at me, his gaze turning from reassuring to questionable. I sighed, weariness starting to settle into my bones.

“I know, I know. I can explain it all later,” I said, starting to shuffle back to the impala, seeking the comfort of its plush leather seats.

“What? No, (Y/n) you don’t owe me an explanation if you don’t want to. I just want to know if you’re ok?”

I stopped and looked up at him, and something about the kindness of his voice and the concern in his eyes had me falling to my knees, my body heaving out a sob. Then another. And another. Until I couldn’t stop for air and hot tears washed my makeup down my face and my hair stuck to the streaks they left behind. Sam simply crouched down and pulled me into him, rubbing my back and telling me softly that everything will be ok. It was a comfort to feel his chin on my head and his heartbeat beneath my fingertips, the steady thrum eventually soothing away my anguish.

I have no idea how long we were sat there for, but he eventually coaxed me to my feet and led me to the car where Charlie was waiting with a pained expression. She would have seen, or at least heard everything that went down through the security cameras linked to her tablet - she was one of the few people in this life that had met my ex.

I was gently manoeuvred into the back seat, my head resting on Charlie's lap as she played with my hair. Sam had waited outside the impala for a few minutes before climbing into the passenger seat, slamming the door closed. Not five minutes had passed when the door slammed again as Dean clambered in, the stench of blood thick on his clothes, however the comforting scent of his cologne still managed to waft through. He turned to face me, those mossy green eyes piercing into mine as he said with the gentlest tone he could muster:

“It’s done, sweetheart.”

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Next: Chapter 12

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[paradiseismine]

Hii could I req Trevor x Ghost reader? Just anything smut or whatever i love your work tyy 🫶🏻

See you in your dreams - Trevor Spengler x ghost reader

Pairing: Trevor Spengler (Ghostbusters Afterlife) x ghost! f!reader

Warnings: softer smut; some hurt/comfort; some fluff; references to Wuthering Heights (if you squint); also maybe kinda long hehehe

Love note from Nina: omggg you guysss I got my first request!! I got sooo excited for this, I’m sorry it took me a few days. I did some research on how ghosts work in the Ghostbusters universe, but this may have some slips here and there. Hope you like it, anon! 💕 also: feel free to send me more reqs, I’d love to hear (read?) your ideas!

Growing up, Trevor always detested going to aunt Cathy’s house. Although very big and castle-like, it was always weirdly cold, somewhat decayed and had this creepy aura in there - kind of similar to the house he had moved in with his family a while ago, and that was his first argument when his mom, Callie, said she wanted to visit her sister. Aunt Cathy was Callie’s only sister, and one of the few family members they had left, so he couldn’t say no to his mom when she pleaded for him and Phoebe to tag along. They were only staying there for a week, tops, she promised.

As they arrived after a four hour drive, Trevor greeted aunt Cathy and helped Phoebe bring her luggage upstairs. It was an unusually big house, so they could each have a bedroom of their own. That made it a bit easier. Trev was feeling pretty introspective and definitely needed some time for himself. After some fancy dinner where aunt Cathy and mom talked about uncle Heath’s death throughout the entire three-course meal, he excused himself to get ready for bed.

A few minutes later, his mom knocked on the bedroom door.

- Get some rest, Trev - Callie said, approaching and running her fingers through her son’s hair in a lovingly manner, as he was sitting on the bed. - You deserve some time off after all of that ghost busting. There are no ghosts here, you’re safe to rest.

- No ghosts here??? That’s what we’ll see! - Phoebe yelled from the corridor, joking. Callie had left the door open.

Trevor chuckled and smiled at his mom.

- Thank you, mom. I will. Get some rest too, you must be tired.

She kissed his forehead and clicked the lights off before shutting the door, leaving him alone in the bedroom. Trevor let out a deep sigh and lied in bed, tired. Shortly after, he drifted off.

To someone who would normally have a hard time falling asleep on a new environment, that was pretty unusual. Maybe it was just tiredness, but something made Trevor sleep very soundly that night. He even started dreaming.

The dream set was some sort of forest. Not too dense, so he could still see the sky in a charming shade of blue. The birds were chirping softly and he could smell the grass, one of his favorite smells. That dream was weirdly vivid, for some reason. After walking around the forest for a minute or so, he spotted a girl dressed in a long white dress. It was you. Your hair cascaded along your shoulders and back, beautifully, as you turned around and noticed him. You had a small basket in your hands, and were absentmindedly picking out flowers next to a small cottage. He assumed it was your house.

You waved at him gently, smiling. He smiled back and felt confident enough to approach you and talk.

- Uh, hi - he said, a bit nervously. No conversation ever felt so real in a dream before.

- Hi Trevor - you responded, calmly. How did you know his name? - You created such a beautiful setting for this dream. Did you grow up in the countryside or something?

- I, uh… Not really, I just feel very at peace near nature, I guess. - he was able to finally look into your eyes.

The connection you both felt was instant. You didn’t know that much about him yet, and he knew nothing about you, but somehow, it was like a magnet was drawing your bodies closer. You two were paralyzed by each other’s gaze for a second, smiling shyly when you were able to look away.

- Do… Do I know you? I mean, you knew my name and everything, so I…

- Not really, no - you answered, shrugging. - My name is y/n, nice to meet you.

- You’re just something my mind made up, then? I mean, it makes sense that my brain would create a girl for me to talk to and stuff…

- No, I existed before being on your mind. - you pursed your lips together, not sure if you should have revealed yourself so early into the conversation.

- Y-you’re not a creation of my mind? - he inquired, utterly confused.

You chuckled and put some more flowers in the basket.

- Do you want to come in for some tea? - your head pointed at the cottage. - Maybe we can talk more comfortably in there.

- Hm, sure - he nodded. - But how do you know there’s tea in there? Is it your house?

- No, love - you responded, grabbing his chin for a second. - Your mind created this place. I was able to come in a few minutes before you showed up, just to help arrange everything and get some basic information about your life. You seemed so tired, I just wanted to help you release that tension. You’re a really beautiful boy, you know?

- Thank you - Trev laughed, slightly blushing. There were so many questions on his mind. - I mean, let’s go ahead and have some tea then.

You guided him into the cottage and sat him down on a chair next to the kitchen table. The table was already set with a porcelain tea pot and beautiful tea cups. You put the flowers you had picked on a small vase at the center of the table, and set the empty basket aside.

- Did you arrange this before I arrived?

- Aren’t we talking too much about me, darling? Tell me, how do you feel? Like, how do you really feel? - you sat down next to him and put your hand on his upper back.

Trevor slowly broke down crying as he spoke. He was so tired, but felt like he could never show any signs of it. He had to be strong for his mom, for Phoebe, for the Ghostbusters. He had to “man up”, be the man of the house and everything. There was never time for his feelings or for vulnerability. Until now. You embraced him gently, as he suppressed his sobs after communicating those afflictions to you.

- It’s ok, love - you reassured him. - You can cry, you can be yourself here. You’re safe. It’s your own mind, you can do whatever you want.

Trev stayed in your embrace a bit longer, stabilizing his breathing. His arms stopped shaking around your waist, and softly let go of your sides. He distanced himself slowly, just enough to look you in the eyes. Then, without any further notice, he put his lips to yours.

It was a very soft and delicate kiss. He held both of your hands in his, until he had to use one of them to get your long hair out of the way. Caressing your cheek, he deepened the kiss, faintly moaning into it.

- It feels so good to kiss you - you whispered, slightly embarrassed. - I haven’t been kissed in so long…

He guided your face to kiss you once again. It was like he couldn’t contain himself. Your lips felt so good against his. He was so gentle and respectful, you wanted to grab him by the collar and attack his lips with yours.

- You’re… you’re literally my dream girl - he admitted, kissing your palm. - I wish I could meet you in real life and spend more time with you.

- I’m a ghost, Trev - you confessed, more embarrassed than before. - But I’m a, say, rarer type…

- W-what do you mean by that? - he looked at you, confused, his eyes seeming a bit watery again.

- I’m a dream ghost. I can only appear physically in people’s dreams. - you explained, in a more serious tone, grabbing his hand softly. - I don’t haunt houses, or objects, or anything like that. I haunt minds. I can only exist when someone’s dreaming, so I can tune in to their dream. I sensed your presence and ended up in your conscience tonight.

- But I-I’m a ghostbuster… - his eyes blinked in disbelief.

- I know - you chuckled, a sad gaze lingering in your eyes. - It was such an amazing coincidence… You’re not gonna put me in a proton pack, will you?

- Of course not - his eyes widened and his hands tightened their grip around yours, trying to reassure you that he meant no harm.

- I knew it - you responded, lightly pecking his lips again, then letting go of his hands. - You need someone who understands, and I really wish I could be that person. You’ve got a beautiful mind, and oh, such a pure heart, Trevor Spengler…

- Touch me - he said as you stood up, and it nearly sounded like a question. His pleading eyes were desperately looking for yours. - Kiss me, anything. I just need to feel your touch. Please.

- You’re so warm - you put your hand on his cheek, sweetly. - and I’m a cold ghost girl…

- Don’t say that, y/n - he took your hand from his cheek and kissed your palm once again, looking up at you with pleading eyes. - I’m having the best time here with you. Please.

Trevor stood up, towering over you; leaned in again and kissed your lips, more eagerly this time. His right hand lightly grabbed the hair of your nape while his left hand caressed your cheek. You reached for his upper arms, shyly, wonderstruck by that kiss.

He then gently pushed you up against the wall. Trev seemed way more comfortable now, wild even. His lips embraced yours in an inebriating way, hands gripping your waist, hips brushing against yours. You could feel his arousal through his trousers, which sent you even closer to the edge. You felt the dream setting shift, walls disappearing around you for a second. When you opened your eyes, the setting was a bedroom - Trevor had understood that this was a dream, and he could control it as much as he wanted.

- I think I know what you’ve set your mind to, mister Spengler - you broke the kiss, chuckling and gesturing at the huge bed in front of you. The walls were decorated with flowers and beautiful curtains. It was all very lovely and romantic.

- Do you… do you want it too? - Trevor seemed concerned if you desired him as much as he desired you. - I mean, I -I felt so good kissing you, I-

- I would love to - you answered, fondly, as your hands ran through his hair. - Let’s just… Take it slow, ok?

He nodded, his lips red and slightly parted. Trevor leaned in to kiss you once again, much slower this time. The kiss was sensual and dainty, his lips tracing yours in a magnetic way, his hands cupping your face and your own resting on his shoulders and chest.

He put his hands to your waist, pulling your body closer to his in a slow and gentle motion. In reaction, you put your hands to the hair on his nape, holding it rather than pulling it. His hands roamed up to your shoulders, caressing your cold skin. You broke the kiss and nodded, looking into his eyes, giving him your permission.

He pulled down the sleeves of your dress and it slowly fell, pooling at your feet. You were completely bare underneath it, and Trevor let out an audible gasp at the sight of your naked body.

- Can I… Can I touch you, y/n? - Trevor stuttered, mesmerized at your beauty.

- Please… - you moaned, nearly whispering.

- You’re so beautiful - he muttered, his lips parted in awe, fingers gently exploring your breasts and the delicate curve of your waist. - You’re quite literally a dream…

You chuckled softly as Trevor kissed your neck and collar bones, his warm lips like fireworks on your cold skin. You gestured for him to take off his clothes as well, and he gave you permission to do so. Soon enough, you two were both stripped in front of each other. Trevor’s body was so beautiful. His smooth pale chest, his lightly toned arms… all of it made you shiver in anticipation. He took you in his arms again, and you couldn’t help yourself any longer.

- Take me, Trev, I’m yours - you whispered to his ear, enraptured by the pleasure you felt under his warm, soft human hands.

Trev tightened his grip on your waist and swooped you off of your feet. In a couple seconds, your back was against the mattress, as he had carefully deposited your body on the bed. He climbed on top of you and continued trailing his kisses down to your breasts.

Groping your waist firmly, he gently suckled on your nipples, faint moans now escaping your lips. Trevor kissed your body with such amazement, it looked like he wouldn’t stop. He kissed lower and lower down your belly, until he reached your wet slit.

- You don’t have to - you said, running your fingers through his hair to stop him, as his head slowly went downward.

- But I want to - Trevor tilted his head, looking into your eyes. - Can I?

- Well, ye - you could barely finish the word before Trevor dunk his head between your thighs again. - Yes…

He licked up and down your slit, his hot mouth attached to your core, causing your legs to tremble in bliss. He held your thighs apart with a tight grip, as if to detain you from distancing yourself from his touch. His tongue was rolling around your clit, tasting your core with such pleasure, he was nearly getting off on it as much as you. Your sweet juices were dripping down his chin as he lapped you up hungrily, delighted with your taste.

- Trevor… - you moaned, before arching your back on the bed, reaching your mercurial high.

His eyes stared into yours, half-lidded, as he seemed proud of himself for making you moan his name. No boy had ever looked at you in such an intense, lustful way.

As your whole body trembled, he kept going until you had ridden out of your high, you two savoring each second it had lasted.

- Felt good, beautiful? - he asked, a cocky smirk on his face.

- Amazing… - you panted, breathless.

He roamed his hands all over your body once again, warming up your cold skin, making you quiver and tingle. You sat up on the bed to capture his lips, tasting yourself as you kissed him.

- Is there anything else I could do for you, y/n? - he asked, enchanted by you.

- Yes, lay back, my love - you whispered, guiding him to lay down on the bed.

You got on top of him, one leg to each side of his waist. Reaching for his lips one last time, you kissed him passionately, wanting him to remember you. It was only a dream, you knew that. But you wanted him to remember those feelings, that touch, everything.

Going for his earlobe, you nibbled and sucked on it until Trev couldn’t help but moan and squirm under you. His neck was next. It soon got covered in kisses and hickies (it was only a dream and wouldn’t leave any trace behind, either way), just like his chest. You roamed your hands gently all over his torso, savoring the heat and softness of his human skin.

As you sat up on his lap, your heart was beating out of your chest with desire, but you wanted to make sure Trevor was comfortable. You wanted to be his dream girl, not his nightmare.

- May I? - you asked, softly, as your hand held his throbbing erection.

- Yes, y/n, please - he pleaded, lightly panting.

You raised and lowered your hips slowly, engulfing his cock inside you. It had been so long since you felt anything like this… Your muscles were tightening around Trevor’s shaft as you got to its base, and you could feel him shyly thrusting his hips up to meet yours.

- You’re mine now, Trevor Spengler - you whispered, riding him, ecstatic. You threw your head back, getting shivers down your spine, your hands on his chest.

- I’m yours, y/n - he moaned. Trevor’s beautiful dark eyes squinted in pleasure, his mouth opening slightly. His hands grabbed onto your hips to help you with your movements, as he was eager for more.

You don’t know how long it lasted, but your juices were all over his shaft, his inner thighs, everything. Every second of Trevor’s touch, even if he touched you for all of the eternity, still wouldn’t be enough. He was perfect, warm, soft, delicate, and so precise in every single little thing he did.

Trevor whispered your name, his voice faint and raspy, pleading. Your eyes met his immediately.

- Please, I-I - he stuttered, his eyes rolling in pleasure as he tried to speak. - I need to-

- Do it, my love - you grabbed his face.

His eyes squeezed shut as Trevor held your body to his, and with a louder moan, spilled into you. Ugh, he was so soft and warm. You missed being human just like him. As he came down from his high, you got off of him gently, trying no to hurt his sensitive shaft.

As you laid down next to him, you two snuggled up together in a thick warm blanket, enjoying each other’s scent. Trevor was playing with your hair as you rested your head on his chest. All you do could do was thank God, fate, the universe, anything that could be responsible for that encounter. Trev seemed to be doing the same, as he broke the silence a minute later.

- There must be a way - he said, determined. - I… I want to get to know you better, y/n. I don’t think I’ve ever felt like this with anyone before, I…

Suddenly, the whole room started losing definition, becoming blurrier and less colorful. Objects started vanishing slowly, and even though Trevor seemed utterly confused and scared, you already knew what this meant.

- Oh dear - you muttered, sad, gently caressing his cheek. - You’re waking up… Seems like we don’t have much more time together, at least for now. I enjoyed your company so much, Trevor. You’re a really special person. See you in your dreams tomorrow, if we’re both lucky. Try to sleep around 9:30 p.m., if you can.

He felt his body moving without his mind’s command, and the sight of you slowly vanishing from his grasp.

- No… No - he slurred still in his sleep, sad, but defeated. - Come back… Please.

But he woke up. His eyes opened and he realized it was already morning. His mom and Phoebe were arguing in the nearby bathroom over something stupid, and because of their bickering, he woke up.

He turned on the bed, frustrated, trying to fall asleep again, trying to find you; up until he noticed something had happened in his pants… A nocturnal emission. He was wet through his underwear and pajama bottoms, a visible patch of his own cum.

Great, he thought. How am I going to hide this? Y/n better come back to see me again tonight. 9:30, she said. I have to write this down.

[thegreatstoryteller]

Body Swap N’B

Welcome to Body Swan N’B! The premiere destination for all your body swap needs! We all know traveling can be hard. Booking flights, booking travel, and most importantly those outrageous prices. Don’t worry. We’re here with the solution! Why go to those snobby body swap hotels, when you can swap from the comfort of your own living room right into the amazing destination of our choice. Our list of thousands of home owners want YOU to take their body out for a spin from the comfort of THEIR own home. 

Choose between a collection of countless locations and individuals of your choosing. Want to cruise in the Caribbean as a local? Want to sample authentic Parisian cuisine as a refined food connoisseur? How about ride the Texan planes as a real cowboy!? All of that is possible and more with Body Swap N’B! Don’t believe us? Just listen to our satisfied customers

Reviews:

DisneyDad85: 2 out of 5 stars. 

My family and I were planning a trip to Disney and I wanted to find somewhere close to the park. The location was just as promised, a 3 bedroom with a great view. The bodies were not what I expected. I assumed when the listing described a “great way to enjoy the best parts of youth” that we’d be given some family friendly bodies. Not some local young men who were rooming together. I guess “young” is relative as my eldest boy found himself in the most mature body.  Being slightly overweight was new for him as he was always so nerdy and skinny. And as always, on his phone talking to his friends bragging about his new body. 

He loves being the oldest and eating whatever he wants without worry of food allergy. I told him that he wouldn’t like it if he had to worry about all that weight he’s putting on his new body later, but he doesn’t listen. 

Then there was my youngest! He loved the vintage aesthetic to the rooms we were given and he couldn’t stop playing with the phones there. 

He was certainly happy that he was tall enough to ride all the rides at the park, but I did not like how he was now able to consume all the alcohol at the various bars around the area. But being 6′7 and confident, it’s no like anyone would think to card him. Meanwhile I was now the only one of our party not old enough to drink only being 20 years old! Gosh… maybe I shouldn’t have snuck into that bar on the final day of the trip. I can’t believe I drunkenly renewed our vacation for next year! Still trying to contact customer support to discuss cancellation!

Overall good vacation, but just make sure you inquire about the bodies before making a big trip. I still feel just like the reckless 20 year old I was a few days ago. Almost like I’m still on vacation… maybe another trip will do us some good in the near future. 

AlwysABridesMaid: 3.5 out of 5 stars

So I like to imagine myself being very open minded when it comes to these swaps and vacations! I’ve tried out loads of these vacations with my girlfriends  and I when we did sorority parties in college! However, I’ve got to say this is the first time me AND my entire party ended up as ALL guys. Normally it wouldn’t be an issue as we love exploring new experiences and locations, but I don’t think my best friend the bride envisioned being surrounded by a bunch of hairy men during her wedding ceremony. That’s right every single one of her bridesmaids were now half a foot taller and a lot more manly than she expected. I’m mostly mad that I couldn’t fit into our tailor made dress. That being said, the wedding still went off without a hitch! We had so much fun doing spa days, bachelorette parties, and the actual day of wedding in our new bodies despite the small hiccup. 

Would I do this again? Definitely given a heads up about the party. But now that I’m intimately aware of some new male physiology I’d definitely like to try it again. The best man certainly wants to do some more exploration with me after last night. Anyway, has anyone ever heard of the so called “side effects” people keep referring to? The bridesmaids and I all found ourselves inside these book smart engineers and now I feel like my IQ is through the roof. All the girls and I can do at the nail salon is just gab about research papers, new theorems, and the latest technological marvels making the news!

WifeGuy88: 1 out of 5 stars

I swear I’m a feminist. Gotta get that out there before I say that I’m not sure my wife and I should do another of these trips. I heard that there used to be lots of safety procedures when it came to these swaps, but I recently heard that unlike Swap Hotels, they do not have to cover any kinds of safety or ethical costs associated with normal swapping. 

I’m getting ahead of myself. The reason I’m not jazzed about Body Swap N’ B is because… I was a bit jealous my wife was bigger than me…. I know we booked a room for a loving couple…. But I didn’t expect both pairs of that couple to be male. Being a former college athlete and finding myself in a 5 foot nothing twink was a big enough shock.

 But when my wife came stomping in from the other room as a big mass of hair and muscle… well let’s just say that weekend went very differently than I imagined… It all feels like such a blur…. And my ass is still sore…

But no! I’m leaving this as a warning. There are reviews saying your mind thinks differently after the swaps and that some people are claiming they are stuck in those bodies longer than they like! Also my girlfiend signed us up for another trip and due to their zero cancellation policy I know we’re gonna be there sooner than later if things go their way! Not that I mind…. I rather liked being thrown around by a larger man for a change… I’m sure it’s gonna be a lot of fun… but that doesn’t take away from the fact that this company can’t keep getting away with this. Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to find my wife some new male outfits that she wants to try for our next vacation. 

BenTheOrganizer: 5 out of 5 stars

Great for family reunions! 

Normally I was the one that plans all these big family events. Criticism here and there about this location being too hot, too cold, or too far. But hey! Finally got a family gathering we can get behind! Who would’ve thought that it was when my entire family were in the body of one of the biggest college fraternities in the state! Turns out aunt Marjorie doesn’t have time to comment on my lack of partner when she’s doing a keg stand while uncle Larry cheers her on. Turns out cousin Jeremiah can’t brag about making partner as his law firm when he can finally cut loose dancing to some music! Racist grandpa Marvin won’t be making any problematic remarks about minorities when he’s enjoying his big black body so much. And the younger second cousins aren’t nearly as annoying when you can share some beers with them while we all test out our new muscles in the frat’s personal gym. 

My parents were surprisingly the most into the idea. My mom and dad are some of the most heteronormative couples I know but it wasn’t 5 minutes before someone found them making out the frat house locker room. They kept saying it wasn’t gay if it was two bros, but I don’t think any amount of “No Homo” could save face there. Especially when they were caught a few hours later doing the same thing.

As for me… well maybe I put myself into the hottest guy there, the frat president, on purpose when I filled in the special requests portion.  But hey. I think I  deserve it for a job well done. In fact as I’m writing this review I’m still in his body! After all thanks to the “Extend your Stay” option, we were able to  extend our swap vacation for another 2 weeks.  Maybe if this continues going so well I can talk to the company about having us keep these bodies.  I don’t think my entire family can go back to their old lives when they are loving being loud, raucous, muscle heads every day of the week. Now if you’ll excuse me I’ve got another frat party to plan. Thanks Body Swap N’ B!

Body Swap And Breakfast is not liable for any lasting physical, mental or reality changes. Any long lasting development of new abilities or attributes that is shared with a previous swapped body please contact your doctor. Body Swap And Breakfast is not affiliated with Swap Hotel and its affiliates.

Book your Body Swap N’ B vacation with us today!

[yuikomorii]

Happy Birthday to the BEST BOY!!🥳🏀❤️

// You have the ability to accomplish everything you set your mind to, and we all know you’re the apple of Yui’s eye. Thank you for never giving up on others and for making Yui the happiest girl alive while letting her feel like a normal teenager! (*＾ワ＾*)

Love you, Ayato! 🫶🏻

Since you guys asked for a new scenario, I decided to deliver it uwu. I’m still not very confident in my writing skills and I’m aware some parts sound really cheesy but I truly hope you will enjoy it! 💖

~Ayato’s Birthday short story~

Yui: Phew… it’s finally done!

( It took me three fails to make his cake but thankfully I finished it on time! )

Uuh… It was supposed to look better though but maybe the good result lays in the taste?

— Yui tries it —

Just like I thought, the taste didn’t deceive me! I tried my best not to make it too sweet, therefore I truly hope Ayato-kun will like it.

Speaking of Ayato-kun, I wonder if he woke up. It might sound a bit childish but I really want to be the first to congratulate him~!

— Place shifts to Ayato’s room —

Yui: Eh? The door is open…? Could it be that he’s awak—…! He left?

???: Nfu, what’s with the long face? Did you and Ayato-kun have a fight~?

Yui: L-Laito-kun! Gosh, don’t just whisper in my ear like that!

Laito: Why not~? Is it because it arouses you? As expected from you, Bitch-chan, you really grow into that nick—

Yui: E-Enough…!

Look, Laito-kun… do you happen to know where exactly Ayato-kun went?

Laito: And what if I do?

Yui: Well… in that case, where is he?

Laito: Bold of you to assume I’d tell you. You’re always so naive~

Yui: Eh? That’s…—

( Of course this guy wouldn’t help me! I can’t believe I really thought asking him would be a good idea… )

Laito: Nfu, I know that face, Bitch-chan, you were judging me in your thoughts, weren’t you? How rude~

Yui: W-Wait, you got the wrong idea! I just—

Laito: And I was merely trying to do you a favor, but I suppose you don’t appreciate such things from any man, am I right?

Yui: I don’t really get what you mean…

Laito: Well…~ all I’m going to say is that if you tried using your head a little, then maybe you would be able to guess where Ayato-kun is.

Yui: Hmm…

( Now that I think about it, the weather is beautiful today, neither too hot nor too cold. As far as I recall, this is Ayato-kun’s ideal type of weather for playing basketball. In that case… could he really be outdoors? )

Ah, I might actually know the place!

Laito: See? Making use of those brain cells once in a blue moon wasn't all that difficult, was it? Now hurry up or else you won’t be the first one to wish your precious boyfriend a “happy birthday” ~

Yui: …!

( Did he eavesdrop on me today!? )

( G-Geez… It’s a bit embarrassing knowing that he listened to such things. Despite this, he truly managed to be helpful in some way. )

Y-Yeah, I’ll leave right now. By the way… thank you, Laito-kun.

— Yui walks away —

Laito: ( Nfu, I wonder if she really guessed that place right. Too bad that desperate face didn’t last any longer, otherwise I might have truly taken advantage of it.~ )

— Place shifts outside the mansion —

Yui: Hoh— that’s a bit heavy!

( I tried to fit everything for his birthday in this basket but it weighs more than I expected! )

( Uuh… I really hope Ayato-kun is around here. )

???: Tsk, damn it!

Yui: That voice—! Ayato-kun!

Ayato: Huh? Yui?

— Yui jumps into his arms —

Yui: Happy Birthday, Ayato-kun…!

Ayato: Hah? Ah… Yeah…

So you remembered it, huh?

Yui: Obviously, there’s no way I would forget such an important day!

Ayato: It wouldn't have made a difference anyway. Birthdays have never been a reason to celebrate for vampires; they are just like any other day. Basically, we couldn’t care less.

Yui: Well… that might be so, however I do care about it. It’s true that humans and vampires have distinct points of view and mindsets, but this still won’t stop me from considering this day special. After all, that’s when Ayato-kun was born and I’m grateful for that, as a result I want to celebrate your birth.

Ayato: …

Yui: ( He suddenly went silent… Ah, did I really exaggerate with that confession? )

Ayato: Yui…

Yui: …!

( He’s smiling so brightly! )

( I would have never thought those words to make Ayato-kun so happy but seeing him like that… my heart can’t help but fill up with so much joy too…! )

Ayato: Geez, I’m supposed to be indifferent about my birthday but look at me grinning like a fool due to a Chichinashi such as yourself. Now you better take responsibility or else—

Yui: ( He says it in such a threatening way but that blushy face proves exactly the opposite, fufu. )

Ayato: Oi, what’s up with that basket?

Yui: ( Oh, right! )

I got something for you!

Ayato: Heh, only for me?

Yui: Yup!

( Although, I truly hope nothing got crushed. )

— Yui opens the basket and serves cake —

Yui: I know it doesn’t look perfect but I’m confident the taste is on your liking. I remembered that you aren’t too fond of very sweet food, therefore I tried avoiding adding marzipan and focus more on the fruits instead. Do you… like it?

Ayato: Haa… there’s no need for those useless explanations. You made that whole cake for me, so yeah, isn’t it obvious that I’d like it?

Yui: Ayato-kun…

— Ayato tastes it —

Ayato: Mm… as expected, it’s good! To be honest, Takoyaki would have been a far superior choice, but I can't deny that the cake Chichinashi made is also quite tasty.

Yui: Fufu, I knew exactly that you were going to say that, so I prepared this for you!

— Yui serves him Takoyaki —

Ayato: Hah!? Are you a magician or somethin’?

Yui: N-not at all! I just know Ayato-kun loves Takoyaki so much that he would eat them everyday, hence they couldn’t miss out on his birthday, right?

Ayato: You…

— Ayato pins her down —

Yui: Eh—?

Ayato: Bet you weren’t prepared for this, were you?

Yui: ( Is he going to suck my blood? )

— Ayato kisses her —

Yui: Nn…!

Ayato: Now I am the one catching you off guard. How does that feel, eh?

Yui: Good…

Ayato: Oh? What happened to “Ayato-kun, that’s so embarrassing!” ?

Yui: I-I mean… it is a bit yet I can’t deny that Ayato-kun’s gentle kisses are the best.

Ayato: Tsk… Why not so cute and honest all the time? Is it ‘cause of my birthday or what now?

Yui: I just felt like it…

( He’s just getting cuter and cuter! )

By the way… there’s one more thing I have to give you.

— Yui starts searching —

Ayato: A photo frame?

Yui: That’s so. I asked the school photographer to take this photo exactly when you scored and brought victory to your team. The happiness you felt in that moment… that’s something I always wish for you to experience.

— Ayato slightly blushes —

Yui: I also tried to decorate the frame myself based on what you like the most b-but if it’s too childish, then I will try to——

( He’s hugging me! )

Ayato: “What you like the most” she said, but how come I don’t see her there too then?

Yui: T-That’s—!

( Was that an indirect confession!? )

Ayato: Pfft… haha, that’s exactly the reaction I expected!

Love you, idiot. You really are the best~!

— Ayato stands up and starts walking away —

Yui: W-Wah—! Hey, d-don’t make fun of me like that!

Ayato: Can’t hear you~! If you wanna tell me something, catch me then!

Yui: You meanie!

— Yui stands up and starts running after him—

Yui: ( I can’t help but feel like a child once again when playing with him like that. It’s such a nostalgic feeling that somehow feels so distant... )

( As we run around the mansion, Ayato-kun is showing me his genuine smile… that’s the face that makes me fall more and more for him each and every day. )

( I love you Ayato-kun, thank you for being born. )

[colemorrison]

If we lay, just let the day pass us by

Cole writing an actual story?? What??? Here's chapter one, enjoyy. (1003 words)

It was stupid, a dating app? You had enough on your plate with school and your insufferable parents yet you wanted more, maybe you’d find the one. 

‘Ramattra, 28’ 

That’s all the robot's profile said, a robot? You.. are gonna swipe on a robot? 

“Can’t be.. That bad right?” 

There was no way he’d swipe on you too, or at least that’s what you had thought until your phone dinged hours later while you were doing chemistry homework. 

“A human, swiped on me? An omnic?” 

He spoke oddly, like he was much older than what he said, maybe that was a red flag or maybe it just drew you in further. 

“Is there something wrong with that?” 

“I don’t believe that is what I said, I apologise if it came off that way.” 

“Oh, you have manners?” 

“That surprises you?” 

You smiled at your phone, two seconds of knowing this guy and you were already smiling at his texts? Oh no…

“Yes, yes it does. I guess I assumed because you’re an omnic that you’d be.. Different.” 

“That sounds like an insult.”  

You didn’t reply, leaving the conversation at that for a moment, where was this guy, did he live on the other side of the world? 

“Have I scared you off?” 

“Oh, no. I just got distracted, I was doing homework.” 

“The chemistry page? Do you need help?” 

“You go to school with me?” 

He didn’t answer after that, was that scary or attractive? 

——

The next morning he still hadn’t answered, you kept an eye out through all your classes, especially chemistry but he wasn’t there. 

“So either you’re a stalker or a liar, which is it?” 

The omnic had started typing instantly but didn’t reply till minutes later. 

“And if I said both?” 

How could you reply to that? You could say you’re into it, you could block him or you could continue this and give him a chance. 

“I’d say that you should quit stalking me and talk to me properly.” 

“Oh?” 

“You’re an omnic, you should be confident.” 

“On that note, perhaps you should find me in the field at lunch tomorrow.” 

“You can’t eat..”

“That is true, are you afraid?” 

“Yes.” 

“Would it make you feel more comfortable if we met in a public place?” 

There was an odd part of you that trusted him, you were afraid but not in the way most people would be. 

“No, the field is fine. I’ll see you there?” “Yes.”

You were going to go and give a robot a chance..? First you swiped on him, spoke to him, now you were going to meet him? How foolish of you.. When you downloaded that app you knew you wanted something, part of you was desperate for it, but this?

“Ah, you look just as beautiful as in your photo.”

His voice was smooth, he knew what he was saying and who he was speaking to with no worries or hesitations.

“So you are a stalker.”

Your voice was the opposite of his, rough and unknowing. You were nervous, this was terrifying, you kept to yourself usually, not interested in anyone else, yet here you were.. Drawn to a robot you met on a dating app. 

“You don’t sound so happy to see me.”

“That does not answer my question.”

Ramattra sighed, if he could roll his eyes they would be out of his head by now. He had a million things he wanted to ask you and here he sat, answering your questions.

“No I am not a stalker, I do go to school here. I missed yesterday due to some personal issues.”

“Ah, because that isn’t totally suspicious.”

He sat down next to you, his surprisingly soft metal hands brushing with your own, he had a messenger bag on his side that now settled in his lap. What could he have in there, no way it was simply just school items, it looked too bulky.

“You seem confused, or is it concern?”

“Actually it’s hunger.”

“You did not bring food?”

“Nope, was too focused on meeting someone here.”

Maybe he was genuinely confused or maybe he was teasing you but his head tilted when you said that.

“Are you meeting someone else here?”

“No, I was talking about you.”

You laughed at him, finding it cute the way he was confused over something that was oh so obvious. He looked nice for an omnic, almost too nice, a white button up and black slacks paired with his cute little bag.

“I.. Do not know what to say.”

“Where is the confidence you had when you got here? Hmm??”

The omnic turned from you, seemingly finding the long stretching field in front of you much more interesting, never had a human flustered him like this, he felt like his entire body was on fire. Part of him wanted to walk away, forget this date idea that he had in mind but at the same time he could feel your waiting eyes, you wanted something from him.

“You’re staring.”

“Yes I am, I wanted to see if you would gain your confidence back to slip back down again.”

“How about I take you to the cafe down the road and we never speak of this again.”

Ramattra stood, stepping down the bleachers before offering you a hand, was he seriously going to offer you lunch after embarrassing himself? You looked at him for a moment before taking his hand and slowly getting off the bleachers to walk with him, he hadn’t let go yet. For some reason, neither did you.

“Is there something in particular you’d like?”

“Are you paying?”

“I did offer so yes.. Was that not obvious?”

“And there is the attitude I was expecting.”

“Just surprise me, I’ll find us a table.”

“Wait I-”

He had started but you were already wandering away to find you two a decent table, the music in the cafe felt oddly romantic, especially for the fact you two were the only ones inside.

————

@ya-zz, I did not think that I would get this done but holy shit here it is. I hope you guys enjoy.

[jounosparticles]

say, have you ever wondered on the backstories of the hunting dogs? We have basic guesses and answers to some of the guild, and alot of the port mafia and all of the agency but we have no idea for the hunting dogs other than fukuchi and tachidarling. Especially Tecchou and Jouno like what if they had a double black kind arc

this ask made me giggle a bit because i literally got the same question right before you which i talked about each individual character here !!!

however i didn’t look into how tecchou and jouno’s backstories where they meet each other would be so ill do that here!

tecchou and jouno

- they 100% make a great team for their line of work. tecchou is great at offensive combat and jouno is good at subtly and secretly getting close to enemies. they contrast each other very well

- due to this i think from the start they got put on a lot of missions together!

- i assume tecchou has been in the hunting dogs longer than jouno has

- jouno still hasn’t gotten used to tecchou’s antics after so long, i imagine he was much more irritable at the start.

- however jouno only explains why he "hates" tecchou in chapter 61, six years after they met assuming tecchou has been here the whole time. this makes me think jouno was easily irritated but tried to remain composed

- this does make me wonder what exactly was his breaking point. was it just the foods or does he do other things that prove his "soul has no artistry”?

- anyways. jouno was probably annoyed from the start. maybe he didn’t express it as much at first since he wants to keep the job? we know he shoots a lot of internal jabs at people. id LOVE to see a chapter of him meeting everyone and what he’s thinking

- tecchou probably didn’t mind jouno at all from the start. he clearly cares a lot about him by this point. i’d like to assume he just always liked jouno and their working together brought them closer

- their work habits probably clashed for a while.

- regardless of all this they likely were amazing together when in combat and were paired together from the start

- we seen how effortlessly they took down the agency (until chuuya saved them), clearly they worked together to the point where they are confident in each others abilities

- also little headcanon but i like to imagine tecchou helped train jouno in his swordsmanship. hehe suegiku brainrot always and forever

- fukuchi probably teamed them up.

- i feel jouno probably got into friendly-teasing once they got comfortable around each other. the "i hate you the most" bit in ch61 was an example of that

- no team of people that genuinely hate each other work that well together. note how akutagawa and atsushi had a moment of connection too before they fought together the first time, you can’t work well with someone you don’t get and despise.

- of course i only put emphasis on that above on jouno’s behalf. tecchou never appeared to dislike him

- i like to think tecchou very quickly seen through jouno’s tough exterior. he seen that jouno was a good person under the way he acts, and keeps that opinion to himself. i think he gets jouno better than anyone else on the team because of this

[your-talos-is-problematic]

WIP Wednesday!

Thank you @umbracirrus @skyrim-forever and @throughtrialbyfire for the tags! Tagging @sylvienerevarine and everyone else who wants to join!

More BG3 stuff! This one’s a retelling of a pretty major scene in early Act 3, so spoilers ahead as usual. Also it’s got missing chunks signified by a double space as usual. I am impressed by some of y’all’s ability to not jump around while you’re writing 😅 I really like writing BG3 and this scene stuck out to me as such an uncomfortable moment in game. I’m quite proud of this WIP so far :D

————————————————————————

A servant approached us and gave an awkward half bow. “The Archduke-to-be wishes to speak with you,” they said. I cursed the ambiguity of the you pronoun in Common. The request felt pointed at Karlach and I, but I waved over Astarion and Wyll anyways. They were locked in what seemed like an extremely boring conversation with a noble. Once they had extracted themselves, I pointed with my tail towards the throne. “It’s go time,” I said. “Remember, we’re staying peaceful for now.” I could feel Karlach’s hand heat up a bit in mine. I pressed a horn to her forearm, hoping she got the message. I don’t want to do this either, but we have to.

Gortash lightly picked up my right hand and placed it between his gloves. I shivered. This is wrong. It was wrong for him to be staring at me so intensely with a face like he was plotting something. It was wrong that Karlach was twenty feet from the man who ruined most of her life and I wouldn’t let her do anything about it. He was even holding my hand wrong- the metal tip of his glove dug into the scales at my wrist. Most stupidly of all, my brain screamed that it was wrong of me to have taken my own gloves off earlier, since it was against the dress code.

I couldn’t take my eyes off his face. I swear there were more people around earlier. From this angle, everyone was too far, Karlach and Astarion and Wyll and Gortash’s guards. Right now, it was just us and two massive Steel Watchers lurking behind the throne. It was disgustingly private. I held eye contact, but I could feel my heartbeat speed up in panic.

“Your name is Tilia, correct?” he asked. It was such a strange, normal question for him to be asking. Unsettling, but at least it made it easy to answer.

“Tilia of Tragedy,” I clarified. My voice came out shaky.

He smiled and nodded. “A virtue name, I assume. Very infernal.”

Instead of thinking of a response, I just nodded. When had I ever gotten choked up like this? Titles didn’t scare me. Neither did thrones or the middle-aged men who thought they deserved to sit on them. The Steel Watchers scare me, I guess. They had a scent that was very familiar, like they might be made of infernal iron. And there were at least six of them in the room, but only four of us. Stay focused, Tragedy. You’re not fighting right now. “Yes,” I said. I wasn’t quite sure what question I was answering.

As soon as we were in the hall, Karlach whipped around to face me. “What the fuck was that, Tilia?” She sounded both mad and disappointed.

“I know,” I said. I could feel my tail trying to wrap itself around my ankle. Her being mad felt wrong; her being mad at me felt much, much worse. “But we agreed that we’d stay peaceful-“

“We said we’d stay peaceful,” Wyll said. “Not make an alliance with him.” Astarion said nothing, but stared at me with an incomprehensible expression.

At least that was an easy claim to dispute. “We’re not making an alliance with him. I’d never do that.” It was so strange to be on the defensive against Karlach and Wyll.

“Why would you tell him you’d consider it?” Karlach hissed.

“Karlach, I-“ My eyes were watering. I gave up on words and just pointed to the end of the hallway, where a Steel Watcher stood on guard. My friends followed my hand. While the three of them were turned away, I sniffled and tried to regain my confidence. “Right now, we’re too vulnerable to risk angering the city’s government, especially when he has the Steel Watch with him,” I explained, my voice calm. “I didn’t want to refuse his offer outright and give him a reason to be mad. But I promise that I will never, ever accept it. Even if it means the city turns on us.” I stared into Karlach’s eyes, pleading for a reaction.

Wyll spoke first. “I see where you’re coming from, Tilia. I think we all-“ he angled his head towards Karlach- “would have just liked to have been briefed beforehand.”

I pressed my lips together. “In my defense, I was not expecting him to be okay with sharing power with anyone.”

Astarion piped up. “Clearly someone thinks you’d be a good Archduke.” It seemed to snap everyone out of their emotions. Wyll shook his head with a sigh, and Karlach laughed and walked over to me to ruffle my hair. Her hands were still warm, but not dangerously hot anymore.

“I’d be a horrible Archduke,” I said. “Plus I wouldn’t get to use my university degree.”

Karlach leaned down to kiss me. I breathed a sigh of relief. “Nerd,” she said with a giggle. “Now let’s get out of here before we run into anybody else.”

“That seems like a good idea.” I grabbed Karlach’s hand. We both waited for Wyll and Astarion to start walking before we did, falling into step a bit behind them.

After a few silent minutes, Karlach asked, “He was talking pretty quiet for a bit there. Did he say anything… weird to you?”

I frowned. “No, but there was an undertone.” I rubbed my forehead scales against her. “That’s kind of the only way you can have two people on the throne, so… I don’t think he meant anything by it.”

She nodded. “Hopefully. Or he just has a thing for tieflings.” We both laughed emptily. My heart was still beating at a mile a minute, and the faint crown of flames around her head made it clear that she wasn’t all the way done with being mad at him. Or at me.

[incorrectcoldflashblog]

Answer the Questions and Tag 5 Fanfic Authors

Thank you so much to @kitkatt0430 for tagging me <3

1. How did you get into writing fanfiction?

Well, I got back into Coldflash in a big way a couple years ago, and kind of got frustrated not really seeing anything new in the tag, lol. Desperation is usually my biggest motivator to do anything. If I had unlimited new Coldflash fics coming out, I probably would never have written my own tbh.

2. How many fandoms have you written in?

Just the one. I used to do translations for a different fandom, though, so maybe two depending on if translating counts.

3. How many years have you been writing fanfiction?

My own? Only a year and a half. Translating, maybe roughly ten years.

4. Do you read or write more fanfiction?

I probably write more now, but you wouldn’t know it because I’m such a slow writer!

5. What is one way you’ve improved as a writer?

Oh, I feel like my English has definitely gotten better since I started writing regularly. I always felt obligated to put a little disclaimer at the bottom, like please be nice to me, this isn’t my first language, lol. I feel a little bit more confident about it now (although I still obsessively google every sentence and word).

6. What’s the weirdest topic you researched for a writing project?

I mean, thanks to Chapter 4 of What Happens in Vegas I know now way more than I ever needed to know about tornado sirens, considering we don’t have them in my country, lol. I also ended up doing extensive (and totally pointless) research about the ancient Sumerian city-state of Ur (located in the South of what is now modern-day Iraq), which is where Len/Cold was supposed to be from in my AU where he was a genie. For those who are unaware, Ur fell in about 2000 BC and had a very famous poem written about it. Here is the cheery opening of 11 stanzas of misery:

For the gods have abandoned us

like migrating birds they have gone

Ur is destroyed, bitter is its lament

The country's blood now fills its holes like hot bronze in a mould

Bodies dissolve like fat in the sun. Our temple is destroyed

Smoke lies on our city like a shroud.

blood flows as the river does

the lamenting of men and women

sadness abounds

Ur is no more

7. What’s your favorite type of comment to receive on your work?

I always appreciate when people point out the parts they liked. But honestly I’m happy for people to comment at all, especially on older fics :)

8. What’s the most fringe trope/topic you write about?

I don’t know that anything I’ve written can be considered fringe, lol. I do have a Lisa/Iris WIP, which I assume would be more of a rarepair, but I only have one scene written for it so who knows if I’ll ever finish it. I guess the Genie AU was kind of strange.

9. What is the hardest type of story for you to write?

Longfics ;-; God, I’ve gained so much respect for people who can do that consistently for 60+ chapters, or over multiple fics in a series. My longfic isn’t even that long, comparatively, and I still feel like I will never get it done.

10. What is the easiest type?

One-shots, my beloved.

11. Where do you do your writing? What platform? When?

On my laptop. I just use Word and I prefer to write in the morning, which isn’t super ideal because it only leaves me the weekend to really get into it.

12. What is something you’ve been too nervous/intimidated to write, but would love to write one day?

I’m too nervous to start more longfics at the moment because I feel like two is my absolute limit but I’d love to be able to write both the TATBILB-inspired fic I had in mind and the Future Fic that I sometimes play around with. I’d have to finish at least one of my longer projects first, or maybe try to get the whole thing written before posting it but I’m usually too impatient to do that!

13. What made you choose your username?

My username is captainicecube and I picked it because it’s roughly how Captain Cold was translated in the French dub. They translated it as Captain Glaçons (Captain Icecubes), which always makes me laugh whenever I think about it because it’s so stupid XD

Tagging @crestfallercanyon @joanthangroff @tiger-in-the-flightdeck @softboydepot and @moriavis

[bylerfields]

i just read your bottom mike points and its the most sense ive ever read on that topic, considering im a top mike truther. not so much dom mike, cos i think theyre equals, but your thing about mike chiling and come down to wills level was interesting. it makes me wonder how these dynamics would have played out if there was never this supernatural threat... i got the sense that mike still always led, because of how he approached will on the swings, and their little bickers in the whole group even, outside of monster stuff (like the ghostbusters venkman thing). mike being the de facto leader, soft version when with will, seemed like something that had simply always been. he's soft with will, but usually when he thinks will needs caring for. when will isnt in danger, i dont think mike is soft or chill necessarily. so its interesting that you see a matured, grown-into-himself and secure mike as 'chilling'.

and lastly, if they both come down and meet on this equal level of softness, how is that still evidence of mike being a sub? surely that would make them both soft vers?

but your points did make sense and i like that there are some bottomsub mike people out there who dont just see him as a babygirl

all really fair points anon!!

i think it’s just the way i see it or prefer, i guess? i don’t think i ever claimed that theres evidence of mike being a sub, since i’m of the strong belief that there’s no evidence for their sexual dynamic at all.

it’s really just how i prefer to think about it if i had to pick my favorite dynamic or what i’d lean towards when i’m writing.. lmao i think we’re pretty much on the same page tho, since i’m also a top mike truther who thinks they’re equals. so, sure, soft vers is a great description - but my personal preference is that mike is perfectly fine submitting to whatever will says and (for the reasons i said) will is perfectly fine not only asking for what he wants but also taking care of mike bc he wants mike to feel so good (which there is huge evidence for in s4). i’m not forcing others to see it this way, it’s just what i like 🥲 (also i should note that this isn’t the only dynamic i like when thinking of byler concepts, i like it all 😮‍💨 but when talking about which part of their canon dynamic is most satisfying/realistic to me i guess?)

(but i’d rather not have more people come to my inbox saying ‘well what you’re describing is actually still dom mike,’ because to me it’s not. i don’t see him that way as a default/usual assumed dynamic for them.)

to address what you said about mike’s behaviors being more dominant-leaning even outside of supernatural stuff, i guess my stance is that you can’t really separate it? like the way he was in s2 from the start was bc he felt crazy about el being alive or not. and him being the softer version with will is yes bc he has a sense of feeling like he’s taking care of someone, ((((((which i could argue isn’t a traditionally masc role but i won’t)))))) but also because it’s a safe place for him. i agree with you that he is 1000% the de facto leader of their group. he also paralleled joyce a lot in s1 with his persistence in getting will back and getting the others on board, while also being the gentlest and most nurturing of the boys with eleven.

what i love about mike is that he isn’t a violent person, like, at all - and it’s shown in the times that he does try and defend himself/others - it’s unnatural. i love that he can be the leader who people look to for guidance but not because he demands it, he just is. he’s the quietest in the party when theyre at the arcade in s2. there’s a common theme of will trusting and confiding in him where he wouldn’t with others. themes of nurturing, safe haven, emotional intelligence, follow mike before the clear shift in s2-3 when things start to become unmanageable for him. there are a lot of things that set him apart from dustin and lucas in s1 as far as typical masc traits and how they treat el (especially noticeable with lucas, since he and mike have pretty similar motive to get will back).

as far as him not being soft or chill w will when he’s not in danger, i guess we’ll have to agree to disagree? i’m thinking about “another 90 miles, why” and the softness in his tone when theyre on the couch, before will discloses that 001 isn’t dead. demanding and aggressive isn’t his default in a comfort setting. it’s just something that’s easy to pick up on for me, something i enjoy exploring more of, and a cool thing about fanfiction is that ability to have different interpretations or see qualities in characters that you focus on more while others choose different ones to expound on.

i’ve always said i think it’s presumptuous to assume the mike we see, with his clear multitude of external pressures, is the one he’ll be years from now. (will too, but mike is the focus here). and it’s really not far fetched when you look at how he is in his earlier days that he’s softer than the typical boy and would likely level back to that when settled and regulated.

thanks for the ask & i’m glad my take made a little sense 🩵 i mostly end up word vomiting when it comes to the mike topic

[archivalofsins]

Weird question, but what do you think would of happened if Kotoko was voted guilty in T1?

Not a weird question at all. I've thought about it a lot and I believe if Kotoko was guilty with the other prisoners from trial one than Mahiru would have ended up supporting her in the same way that Amane did Futa. I think Mahiru stating that she doesn't hold any animosity towards Kotoko is meant to subtly highlight that.

She even goes as far as to say that Kotoko has something that she can't let go of just like she can't. A value or an ideal. So, if Kotoko were guilty she probably would have ended up having a better relationship with Mahiru.

Because Mahiru seeks out Kazui to confide in very similarly to how Mikoto confides in Futa on his birthday-

21/10/06 (Mikoto’s Birthday)

Mikoto: ……ah, Futa? What’s up? Did you come to celebrate my birthday? Futa: Hah!? Like I care about your birthday. ……what’s up with you, though, you’re usually a lot more excited. I thought you were the sort of idiot who’d make a big deal over your birthday. Mikoto: Yeah, usually that’d be the case. ……I think I must be getting tired. It’s like I’m anxious over something but I can’t really explain what it is…… Like, the feeling that I’ve been totally wrong about something. Haha, but it’s not like talking to you about it is gonna do anything. Futa: Yeah, yeah, just like you say. Talking to me about it isn’t gonna help. ……but, it’s not like I don’t get what you’re saying. Or rather, I understand exactly what you mean. And if it’s the same thing as I’ve been feeling, then it will just get stronger as time goes on…… probably. But anyway, rather than talking to someone like me you should go and bother the others. Go and get showered with their stupid birthday wishes.

21/08/05 (Kazui’s Birthday)

Kazui: Oh, Shina-chan? How scandalous, coming to a man’s room in the middle of the night like this. Well, not that it’s really a room, just a cell. ……just kidding, since you brought some drinks with you, I’m assuming you’ve come to wish me a happy birthday, right? Thank you. Mahiru: Yep! Happy birthday Kazui-san~ Clap clap clap! But as well as that~ ……I also just maybe wanted to use it as an excuse so I could ask you for some advice over drinks, I suppose? Kazui: Advice, huh. Well, you’re more than welcome, but I don’t really know what advice an old man like me could give you. I haven’t got the first clue about what love is like for a young girl nowadays. Mahiru: Ahaha…… Don’t worry, much as I’d love to talk about that too, um…… er, Kazui-san. You know, recently I’ve been having the same dream every day. Lots of people were denying my actions...... Denying my thoughts…… that sort of dream.

So, Mahiru was looking for someone to rely and confide in during the intermission. Kotoko states that she wants others to rely on her and has no issue admitting her similarities with Futa-

Q.09 Which of the other prisoners do you think resembles you the most?

Kotoko: That’s a hard one. I’m only able to answer based on my guess on what they did. But I think the one that probably resembles me the most is Futa? Though he’s also the person who resembles me the least.

Mahiru would fit her definition of a weakling. Plus since she said from the beginning that she believed what she did was right-

Q.03 Do you think any other prisoners who committed the same sin as you deserve to be forgiven?

Kotoko: Of course. Haven’t I already said that I believe my actions have been correct?

If she was found Guilty she would more than likely think that Es' judgment was wrong not Milgram. This could either lead to her alligning herself with the other guilty prisoners or going completely rogue. Though Es would no longer be filling the role of the weakling she swore to protect but a villain someone who persecutes the weak and innocent.

Kotoko states that she's low on the heiarchy within Milgram,

"Sigh... "A murderer". Is that so? Trying to remind me of my low position in the hierarchy of this place? Don't disappoint me. Well, maybe it doesn't matter."

Along with the fact that that she views herself as innocent and in the right. So I don't believe it's a stretch to think that if Es were to find her guilty off the bat i that would make them the evil one in her eyes. Just like how Haruka easily said that Es wasn't his mom when and went to Mu. Kotoko would probably due the same thing with Es saying they weren't the weakling she thought they were and finding someone else.

She hates Mikoto but Mahiru is weak and helpless she almost died because of being jumped and the guilty verdict hit her hard emotionally. Kotoko even recognizes that from her innocent position and weeaponizes that against Es.

So I think given all that she'd end up latching to Mahiru to get the vindication she needs. This might ultimately begrudgingly lead to her working alongside Mikoto in some way and probably not being as blatant with her actions. Since the only reason she was probably so out in the open with her behavior was due to being found innocent. Considering she very actively disguised herself and snuck around before being brought into Milgram.

So that's what I think Kotoko would have been like if she was innocent and why.

[party-gilmore]

absolutely wild learning about my austistic leanings later in life because like

my parents just thought i was “eccentric” and found me rather entertaining, weirdness and all (plus their own probably undiagnosed AuDHD making their benchmark for normal skewed anyway) and my mon specifically was always so “mever change for anyone just be you” from a very young age so i just…

never experienced the concept of masking i guess?

Not as masking, I mean.

i would read accounts from autistic people talking about their experiences and struggles and pressure to conform and masking and the mental effects thereof and i would feel empathy because i “went through similar issues” but i th

i thought i was just being bullied for being Weird. just in general. like kids do. that this was a case of “well this sounds a lot like what i go through, but im not actually autistic so it probably isnt my place to join the conversation.”

it just never clicked that, “um. hi. these are the exact same behaviors you do. and there were moments in your life that almost led you to masking. because thats what it would’ve been. masking. but your dumb ass thought it wouldve just been ‘changing how you act and who you are in order to be bullied less’ which okay TECHNICALLY yes that is an accurate if watered down description of masking too, but.

Then you refused to on principle, because bullying is bad and fuck you and got angry about it to the point of overcompensating and INCREASING your Behaviors (tm) until you completely skipped over one of the key experiences that wouldve helped you identify with other people on the spectrum later in life.”

I just rolled through life like a steamroller of righteous, spiteful confidence that my preferences and actions were nobody’s business but my own and vice versa unless they clearly and directly affected others - so much so that I never actually set any kind of benchmark pattern for the way (NT) people around me act.

So I never had a benchmark for masking.

like im going back through all my memories of friendships that soured because i took everything at face value instead of trying to read deeper into cues. because I would always just say what i wanted people to know, straight up. like if i wanted attention i would ask for it if i wanted them to know i was hurt i would tell them. That made so much sense to me i assumed that was the norm. Because clearly. Thats logical. and obvious. So certainly other people are doing the same.

I got blinsided a LOT by the games my school friends and later some early adult friends played, yeah, but AGAIN (see: steamroller of self confidence) I simply assumed that was THEIR problem, not mine, and just… grieved the friendship and hoped for their sake they’d eventually sort their shit out 🤣

I literally thought they were the ones having difficulty with social contracts and cues and relationships.

Then over the past couple years the more I see accounts from other people in the AuDHD spectrum, like “yeah neurotypicals actually [thing i had been assuming was just an asshole trait for years without questioning it], heres what they really mean and a good script for responding” and “its funny how i [exact behavior i did for years] and no one realized i was austistic till later” im like… 🙃

And the last kicker was the post about food touching with the tag response “sometimes masking your autistic traits ends up more autistic than the unmasked trait” and my gut reactions were, in order:

…why would you bother to mask that, why is the way you eat anyone elses business?

i mean i guess it would ease up the pressure a bit, i got bullied for that too, i can see how maybe you wouldnt want to have to put… up with…

…

oHHHH SHIT IS THAT WHAT IT WOULDVE BEEN. IF I HADNT BEEN SO ANGRY ABOUT BEING ASKED TO CHANGE. IT WOULDVE BEEN MASKING. IF I’D KNOWN WHAT THAT WAS. THIS WHOLE TIME.

its just… its just been a series of months of me shaking my head and realizing my entire life has been that meme like “Am I having difficulties connecting socially??? No, it is everyone else who is wrong.”

🤣 girl help

[bright-eyed]

.

So I was freaking out the other night because i had like an awkward 30 minute conversation at the bar with my favorite old professor. She told me that i was a good writer, and asked me why i wasn’t writing. I was just like “idk, i’m watching youtube.” (I didn’t exactly say it like that, but basically.) Then she was like “why are you doing that?” and i didn’t know why.

I felt so overcome with guilt/shame/regret. But also i felt like a piece of shit because idk how i will ever be able to make myself change or overcome this fear of failure/ego death and do better with my life. It’s stopped me from trying for so much of what i want since i was like a little kid—and the thought of not being able to stop myself from giving up before i even start makes me viscerally hate myself… I feel immature and weak for finding it so difficult to do anything more than what I’m already doing. And I hate where I am! And i know i could do other things and be much happier.

But I also know I should probably give myself grace because for years I was working my way out of deep depression, and i did it on my own, and that was its own accomplishment even if it might mean I’m a little behind on accomplishing like ambitions or dreams. I guess? For so long i just had to be focused on not dying or blowing up my own life that i couldn’t focus on that, and i guess i’m still in the mindset of assuming it’s impossible to do more than get through the day, or at least im not practiced in that.

But i’m so phenomenally frustrated with myself that it makes me feel sick and trapped in my own body. The entire world is weighing down on me—all of the things I feel like i need to do and be, all at once, all the time. It feels like I am utterly unequipped to have dreams, so instead of me fulfilling my dreams, they haunt me instead

I guess part of me also resents that i never had any real support. When i was talking about how i only ever really applied to one college, and only did that because it had an easy and cheap application process, Professor asked me why my parents never pushed me to apply for more—she seems to be under the very mistaken impression that i could have gotten into a lot of colleges—and i just told her they just didn’t really involve themselves in my life very much, especially when i was a teenager. Until I said that I’d never even realized that it might be weird for your parents to not push you to apply for colleges, or even really know anything about your life or school experience or ambitions or anything. I just got so angry

And that feels like such a big thing that i’ve had this huge blind spot for this whole time, like why didn’t (and don’t) my parents care ? Where would i be if they had (or did)? Would i feel more empowered and confident enough to try new things, or was i just born weaker than most people? Will i ever know?

What if im not inherently this way but i still can’t undo the damage years of failing and being failed has done to me? Does it even matter if i’m not doomed by nature if i never manage to escape it anyway?

I started writing this post the other night and then ended up talking to my best friend on the phone for two hours which helped. But I'm going to need to transform this frustration with myself into action sooner rather than later because I can't keep living like this and I know on some level it would be so easy to. You know how the time will pass anyways.

Thinking about how much time ive already lost and how much time i might or might not have left to lose makes me feel already halfway dead. I know this resembles a grave but isn’t, but i might stay here long enough to make it one. I keep misstepping back into it. I keep crawling back in and pulling the lid back over to block out the light because I can’t bear it I feel like this is turning too poetic but i can’t explain how i feel in anything but images i guess. I just wish I could be different without having to do the work to change because I don’t trust myself to change. I wish I could be perfect because it’s the only way I feel like I’ll be okay. It’s dumb but idk that’s how I feel

[the-power-of-stuff]

Just sat through the first three NATLA live els and have so many thoughts - the first thing I did was come straight over to your blog because why wouldn’t I?!?

A part of me LOVES Suki’s awkwardness. In fact, none of the gripes I have with Suki and Sokka aren’t about Suki and Sokka and their characterisation themselves, but rather just the execution.

But anyways — the vibe I’m getting is that Season 2 (Book 1? I’m not sure if they’re going by seasons or books) is laying down the groundwork for some of the characters. We know they’re doing that with Azula (and the Fire Lord fam as a whole), but it seems like they’re sort of doing the same with Katara, where they’re starting off with her being a traumatised, almost-shy 14 year old girl who comes into her own as the season progresses.

While I haven’t watched the show in it’s entirety — I probably should have before sending this ask in — I’m assuming this is all leading up to her confrontation with Pakku and role in defending the Northern Water Tribe towards the end of the season. And then that new found confidence in herself and her waterbending carries though to season 2, where we’ll (presumably) find a more fiery, outspoken Katara after I’m guessing a somewhat lengthy time jump?

Anyway — back to Suki. My question to you is, if I’m right in my theory about Katara (and all the others, tbh… I feel like what I said for K can apply to pretty much any of the gaang at this point), do you think the same could be said for Suki and her own development?

We see Suki at the start of ep 2 as a fierce yet slightly socially awkward, sheltered warrior who wants to leave her village and aid in the fight against the Fire Nation and travel the world. As it goes, she does leave her village, and perhaps becomes the confident and sassy (and awful at puns) girl we all know and love, all through her experiences aiding in the war and travelling the world?

Of course, this would mean that her development would largely happen off-screen… but even still, Suki was more familiar towards the end of the episode. She was the one who initiated the kiss, she made her feelings and mostly gratitude known to Sokka by giving him her fan, she told the gaang they had to leave.

It feels like that’s the route Albert Kim is going. He’s made it clear that it’s a re imagination and not a 1:1 adaptation. He clearly wants the show to have its own identity to some extent (e.g. the genocide actually being shown and basically being a mini prologue to the series) and this is his way of doing so through characterisation.

I’ve written way more than I intended, so sorry for this long winded tangent. But what I mean to ask is, do you think in season 2 we’ll see a Suki more similar to the og (while of course still being her own).

I’d love to know what you think! x

Ahh, this makes me so happy!! Thank you so much for enjoying this blog, and for sharing your thoughts and sending this ask! <3 (And absolutely no need to apologize for writing so much, either! Goodness knows I could go on forever about this stuff.)

I think you make a really good point about characterization in the LA, and the potential for certain traits (like Katara's fieriness) to develop more over time. And I've been thinking about it in terms of what we already know about LA Suki that could get built upon in later seasons.

I definitely think it would make sense for us to see Suki come out of her shell a bit more in season 2, although there are some things in the LA that make it hard for me to imagine Suki being quite as sassy as her animated counterpart, just because of the sort of foundation it gives us for her personality.

For one, there's Suki's interactions with her mother. If anyone were going to be on the receiving end of a teenage daughter's sass, even if that sass is buried too deep in shyness to come out around said daughter's crush, it would be her mother. And while we kinda sorta see Suki get a little petulant with Yukari (her delivery of "I'm not too young, I just haven't seen the world" is kind of a swipe? but is really very heartfelt), she overall seems like a well-behaved, obedient daughter. This isn't a King Triton/Ariel situation where you get the impression they've had this conversation a million times before and Yukari is exasperated by Suki always questioning her authority. In fact, it feels like the first time Yukari's even considered that Suki might want something more, and she seems pretty amenable to it, if the fact that she didn't storm into the dojo to break up Sokka and Suki's near-makeout session is any indication. So, even in these private moments where you'd assume Suki is more herself, there isn't much sass to be seen.

(Somewhat related to this, I had a funny sort of "Huh!" reaction to Yukari's, "Such a fierce warrior. And yet such a kind heart." Not that I don't think Suki is kind! It's just not one of the first words I would use to describe her. And not that I would've expected Yukari to say, "Such a fierce warrior. And yet also kind of a pill because you're always giving me lip." But that bit of dialogue is there for the audience's benefit; it was a choice the writers made to tell us what they think is important for us to know about Suki's character. So I had a moment of, "Oh, that's the takeaway we're supposed to have? Interesting...")

And then there's Suki's later interactions with Sokka. On the one hand, when they're training together, the romantic tension is through the roof; it's all very new and interesting for them and it makes sense that they'd still be a little shy about it. On the other hand, Suki gets comfortable enough around Sokka at this point to 1) remove her makeup, 2) have a deep conversation with him, and 3) touch him on the chest. We don't see her show the same awkwardness from earlier in the episode, but she also continues to be very serious. When Sokka pins her, and then she flips them over while he's mid-celebration, she follows up with a useful tip about fighting, and it's delivered completely straight (if a little breathless). No little jokes or jabs. No "Don't get cocky" or knowing smirks.

However, we are not completely without sass! There are a couple moments in particular that I feel have some of that familiar Suki flair.

First...

Lookit her smirky little "come at me, bro" face! That face 100% says, "C'mon then, let's see it, if you're so tough." There's a playfulness here, too, which we know is very much a part of her relationship with Sokka in the animated show. (This Suki up here? I could easily see this Suki saying, "😠I'm an elite warrior who's trained for many years in the art of stealth... I think I could get you backstage!😁")

And then...

The thing I love about this is that she's all, "Nuh uh, I don't think so" (her little head wiggle!), but a fraction of a second ago she was staring blatantly at that boy's mouth. Nice try, sweetheart, but you ain't foolin' anybody. (This Suki is the Suki who smacks her forehead when her boyfriend tells terrible puns to actor-Sokka but who later gazes at him adoringly when he absolutely loses his shit because actor-Sokka actually said "rocky relationship" on stage.)

So...I guess the tl;dr answer to your question is, kind of? I can't see LA Suki getting to "Sorry, Warden, you're my prisoner now" levels of sass, but that's not really the tone the LA is going for anyway. I think we'll see her being very bold (a la taking the initiative to kiss Sokka) and very compassionate (saving Appa—I hope!!), and it makes total sense that, next time we see her, she'll be way more confident than the girl who could barely say a single word to Sokka before attempting to strangle him by way of flirtation. I also hope we'll get to see more of her playfulness! Maybe even some successful flirting? Probably not as forward as "Look at you, sleeveless guy...been workin' out?" but I'd settle for a sly head tilt and a cheeky little grin. And based on what we know of her so far, I don't think that's too much to ask. ;)

[gurokichi]

I slept well while I was actually sleeping,,,, my kitty Pickle woke me up multiple times, kept knocking things over, and got into places he's not supposed to!

Of course, it's my dream, Doll would adore to be with Bon all the time <3 AND I'd get you all to myself, if be the happiest Doll in the world! Awe, thank you, Bon! I'd tailor my flower garden perfectly to your interests because whatever Bon likes, I do too. It'd only make it more beautiful, like you!

Maybe Dolly got a bit confident (⁄ ⁄>⁄ ⁄ ⁄ ⁄<⁄ ⁄) Bon can do whatever they want. It's Bons blog, and I am your Dolly! Nono, I don't mean, unfortunately like that,,, just even IF doll didn't want your attention that's just not something it could handle, Dolly loves and needs Bons attention,,,

we aren't used to being,,, quite this openly needy and obsessed with others ><

Trust me Dolly enjoys and loves it all, just I guess shocked at themself still,,, usually We'd just admire from a far,,, but very spontaneously sent an ask to you that day and hasn't regretted it for even a second, best decision of dolly's life!!!

-Your Doll💕🎀

AH, sorry for the late response, Doll!! I accidentally fell asleep due to staying up all night, ahah (^_^;)

Yippee! I’m glad to hear that you slept well! …I hope your kitty didn’t break anything and is alright 😭

Of course, Dolly. I actually don’t know what flowers I’d like to have in a garden… I’ve really only worked with growing fruits, veggies, and herbs. I’m sure that my doll would be able to come up with a much better arrangement of flowers than I could! Thank you for the compliment and thinking of me, though.

Ehehe, it’s okay. As long as you remember your place, dear! And that makes much more sense… whoops. I apologize for assuming that you meant it that way, Dolly!! I’m happy to hear that you want and love my attention (๑>◡<๑)

Ah, I understand that. I find it quite hard to be openly obsessive, but I promise you that nobody here will judge you guys for it. You can all act as you’d like here. There are people out there who will love you all, even if you consider yourselves needy and obsessive; you just gotta find them ╰(*´︶`*)╯♡ (I wasn’t sure if you were referring to the system as a whole with ‘we’ or just yourself since you mentioned being a system, so I addressed this to all of you. Feel free to correct me if I’m wrong, though!!)

Were you admiring me from afar, Dolly? I’m curious to know! I would love to hear about what made you interested in me in the first place. I’m so glad you did decide to spontaneously send that ask; I’d have never been able to talk to you if you hadn’t! I get so excited whenever I see a notification from you. It was the best decision of your life, you say..? Awh, Dolly, you know how to flatter me. You’re so sweet (＞＜)

[5-7-9]

as much as i despise Virgo’s♍️ antics, she’s the most consistent celestial spirit Lucy has in the series 🥺 when she isn’t being treated as a joke, she can be enduring in a poker face only through actions and words type of way. She wasn’t there for Lucy’s childhood, but i think a maid🤵 would make Lucy feel comforted since she used to have maids. Maybe it’s because she’s a maid and it’s fanservice to show her, but still. She’s possibly the closest celestial spirit Lucy has if not for Loke (i guess he’s in second place). Also she needs to control Earth in more ways than holes because I KNOW SHE CAN DO IT BUT SHE NEVER DOES!!!

MY GURL IS THIS THE ONLY TIME YOU EVER USE EARTH SPICA LOCK SHELL?!!??!?!!??!?! (Sidenote: is she a maschoist because she’s a virgin????). Virgo lending Lucy celestial clothes when they were ripped was nice. (below panels)

Aquarius♒️🌊 is a no brainer, she’s just the last thing from her mother and got last minute flashbacks so she doesn’t count… I do think if it was developed better she’d work fine. I’d still be annoyed with her but I’d at least understand. She’s annoying but she was there for her when she was younger… yeah whatever.

Taurus🐄🐂♉️ surprisingly had a moment when he was controlled which was sorta nice if it wasn’t built on his perversion, but besides that there’s not much there. He’s prideful and straight forward, which could’ve been fun if rewritten… like an Elfman+Natsu combo. Also give him cool axes, can be multiple, i like variety 🪓

Sagittarius🐴🐎♐️ had a few too many losses and doesn’t much besides lose☠️ and shoot arrows🏹. He’s overly… dense? Righteous? Idk. Google says they should be adventurous, so like a hunter? Miss opportunity there. I have no clue what the writer is trying to do anyways. He’s a horse, horses like to run, and bows are for hunters who like the wilderness. He should be hyper aware of his surroundings and overjoyed for future possible quests and battles. It’s really simple. Also he should have special arrows like Green Arrow does including flame arrows 🔥

Crab🦀 cuts hair💈🪮💆🏿‍♂️ and was basically given to Lucy in her later years of childhood (idk exactly when tho). Honestly, I’m not sure what Lucy’s maid Satto would use the Crab♋️ celestial spirit for? Why keep holding it until when Lucy was slightly older but still young?? Might as well give it to Lucy immediately. …Or is it because it was a dude 😐 idk, the story is sexist enough to assume a double standard 🤷🏻 Would be a really cute thing tho if Mr Krab did Lucy’s hair💇🏼‍♀️ for her as a kid. Also his scissors as weapons could be cool if only ✂️✂️

I was gonna mention Scorpio and Gemini until I checked the wiki for my rewatch and there’s a tiny serious moment Lucy has not just with Aries, but with all 3 of the zodiacs. I’m splitting it down but while Aries obviously went through blatant abuse (and we know I want her to gain back confidence and independence), Scorpio mentions how they were all demeaned to and thought of as tools/objects. I’m not even sure what that could possible imply how exactly Angel treated them all, but that’s sounds HORRIBLE!!??!?? I wouldn’t be surprised if they all had an inferiority complex somehow. I can’t even remember Angel’s redemption arc, but this was never again addressed.

Gemini♊️ mocks Lucy and at first appearance everybody else too until they suddenly decided to switch teams because Lucy was against celestial spirits fighting against each other or being used as tools. If that was enough to make Gemini cry, then I gotta ask whether that was the first time a human celestial mage treated them as normal 😓 that robot thingy too. Gemini never stopped mocking Lucy after this btw, fanservice and whatnot, but it would be interesting to see Gemini act like a trickster prankster to everybody again. I like how Gemini could hear and see and remember a person’s memories and thoughts and feelings, big ole hyper empathy. But the fandom wiki makes a good point about how Gemini’s first appearance with Angel was because they copied Angel. I think that’s plenty scary because that essentially makes for one contracted celestial controller/sorta-abuser and one toxic co-worker. That has GOTTA BE TOUGH on Aries and Scorpio 😢 They need to learn to control themselves, imagine if they could change into Zeref 💀 or the celestial king.

Scorpio🦂♏️ is just known for being Aquarius’s boyfriend. He’s not as weird as the other spirits, he just kinda looks inhuman (because he isn’t, lobster) and has an added speech quirk by saying “we.” Idk why he says we, but Sagittarius says moshi-moshi/hello-hello and gemini says piri-piri which i also don’t know why, and Taurus says moo which actually makes sense, so he’s not the weirdest. Uhm, i doubt scorpions make noises? What does the scorpion (fox reference) say?? Crab took “snip-snip” already sooooooo… (searches google) ah- they can hiss and stridulate (making shrill sounds by rubbing body parts together). Huh. 😶 The wiki says he’s loyal and google too, and the fandom wiki makes a great point about how differently Scorpio treats Lucy compared to his girlfriend Aquarius. Going back to the whole “being owned and treated like a tool by Angel alongside his other zodiac buddies” it is kinda interesting for him to date Aquarius who, not to compare Aquarius to celestial spirit abusers, is kinda a destructive force to everyone including her contractor Lucy (which is why her attacks sweeps everyone away no matter whom). No clue how their relationship works out either, Awuarius seems like a totally different person when she’s with Scorpio, while Scorpio doesn’t change at all. Scorpio is considered a loyal characteristic in astrology (i think. I’m trying not to go too deep), so it’s kinda surprising Scorpio would actually cheat on Aquarius. He did kinda feel ashamed or awkward in the GMG arc, but later after that he still calls her his girlfriend she they never broke up. If Loke can advice Aries on strategy, well then I think Scorpio should speak up for Lucy against Aquarius. Considering he was being treated badly by other celestial mages until Lucy (albeit the writing failed to show Scorpio in a normal/casual setting where Lucy isn’t using him as an attack tool 😐 but let’s pretend the writing is good), it stands to reason that Scorpio could reason with Aquarius to “take it easy” on Lucy. Also he should have venom idc if snake boi has it too.

Wow. I wrote a lot about Scorpio lore despite him being one of the least developed celestial spirits. I sure do have priorities (wtf is wrong with me).

Capricorn is tricky since he can easily tell Lucy about her mother Layla since he’s worked with her, but the manga doesn’t really care… so… missed opportunity. Him dancing with Lucy shows he’s actually gonna know how to make Lucy feel at home because he was from her home unlike Virgo. They should honestly just talk.