#I gotta find my motivation again but chapter 3 will hopefully be going up this weekend 🤞🏾🤞🏾🤞🏾

[whoblewboobear]

Thinking a lot about post-junior year resurrected!starbreaker in which they’re both deeply in love but don’t know how to go about it now because of their whole *gestures vaguely* history

Jace has a hard time accepting that despite it all he loved Porter and what it means if those feelings never went away.

But for Porter, it’s much more cut and dry. Yes, he loves Jace. No, he’s not subtle about it. But to say it out loud or to bring it up earnestly in conversation feels too risky of a play. He always leads, but with something so fragile to him he takes the backseat hoping Jace will admit it first if he feels the same.

Jace won’t admit anything because he’s used to following Porter’s lead (and because he’s way too stubborn for his own good.) He beats around the bush just enough to fly under the radar. He also loves when Porter gets jealous.

They get absolutely nowhere until they’re having an unrelated screaming match where Jace slips up and says he loves Porter. And of course Porter’s lame ass says something like “took you long enough.” Knowing full well he could’ve said something sooner 🙄

Related fic scenes that I had fun writing under the cut 💖

~

[weekend-whip]

Hello a bunch of questions if you don't mind and you totally don't have to answer them if you don't want to! Which Character from the show do you not like or find annoying? When you write Do you start your chapter at the beginning or imagine a specific scene? I don't really understand some of Garmadons motives could you maybe explain them? How did you get into the Ninjago Fandom? And I think I read somewhere that you're not going to include the wildbrain seasons so is the stuff with Aspheera and Nya merging with the water and stuff gone?

1. I don’t really find any character annoying! Sure there’s some I’m ‘meh’ about but nobody’s ever really aggravated me (outside of that being the intention of their character). I guess Dareth in the first half of Season 6 would count but that’s low hanging fruit :P 

2. Depends on the chapter, though most of the time I start with a specific scene and then build around it as needed. Sometimes the beginning is the last thing I write! 

3. Can’t fully clarify just yet, there’s a couple spoilers in there, but if it’s not clear by the end of this story I will definitely smooth things out. Just know that Garm’s torn by his rage at Wu, his own ambitions, and his love for Lloyd and they’re constantly at odds with each other. He’s bitter but he cares and then he’s bitter because he cares and he can’t afford to care while he’s full of evil and that makes him feel bad all over again—thus he’s stuck in a very dark loop which maybe Lloyd will break one day. He also just really likes messing with people, and acting on opportunities that may help him further down the line, even if it seems counterproductive in the moment. 

4. I’ve always liked Ninjago from the very start, and been off and on with it until the Wildbrain seasons kicked in (and then I fully started paying attention). But around the time of the 9th Anniversary was when I was like ‘whoa, I gotta do something for the Big 10!!!’ So I integrated myself slowly into the fandom for like a year, mostly watching from the sidelines while I worked on Book 1, and then once I posted it I became a lot more active and now I have some very nice people as friends and I’ve been here ever since <3

5. The reason I don’t want to fully rewrite the Wildbrain seasons (except Crystalized) is the because there’s not a lot I’d change about them. They’re very self-contained and truly do have some solid stories already (with exceptions). That being said, the stuff that happens within them is definitely not gone! For now it’s just a lot of Call-Forwards, but once we hit Season 5 some more of the future influence will come into play. And hopefully, if I play my cards right, I can set up everything I need to without having to write an extra five seasons snksnksnk 

[itsalimere]

I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately bc I’m coming up on the end of my longfic that I started back in February (doing my very best to try to finish it for nano………) I think I’m sort of an unusual case because this longfic (“tapestry”, currently ~81k and 5/7 chapters, likely to be 110ish in the end?) was also my first ever fanfic after existing on the edges of fandom for my whole life, and I think the same things that let me write a fic *at all* are what have kept me going writing for a long time/lot of words.

1) I started writing this because I NEEDED to read it. Guessing that this is not why a lot of people write fic, but I discovered that it’s pretty much the only thing that motivates me! I stalled out on tapestry at chapter 4 in May-ish, but got back to it because I really wanted to be able to experience and know about the full story myself. That pushed me through ch5 in September and is the primary thing motivating me now. No one I know well has read this fic (this is freeing, in a way) and the only one who is die-hard invested is me, but it’s enough to give me point (7) here. I want so bad to be able to read the whole thing and feel that it’s a satisfying emotional narrative for myself. I want a clear, relivable, in-depth daydream of the exact things I want to happen with all these characters. So I gotta finish writing it!

2) The above thoughts from op are all great and super helpful for me to think about too!!

3) This one is kind of related to my first point as as well as op’s (1) and (4) (about loving the idea and not worrying about planning too much). I have reread what exists of tapestry as a reader a few times (because I’m so invested in the idea), but it also helps me see threads I’ve put in by accident, motifs and emotional moments and stuff. That inspires me to follow up on them and can even point the way to where I want the details of the story to go. When I was really stuck on how I wanted ch5/6/7 to go, I reread what I’d written and realized there could be a nice circular structure where the concluding chapters would sort of mirror and wrap up some character points from chapters 3/2/1 respectively, so at the end I have (hopefully) a bit of a full-circle moment. This is something specific to my example, but rereading and analyzing as inspiration helps me in general!

4) Speaking of inspiration - if I’m stuck on a longer fic I’ll sometimes return to some old favorites by other authors with the same ships/characters, or find some new fics to read of them. This helps me feel excited about my own story again by letting me compare/contrast what I’m doing with what others have done. I love these characters and other stories are so great but they’re not exactly what I imagine, so I want to write my thing too! “This emotional note in x fic is so great, I realize the character might feel a similar way in a situation I’ve put them in, and now I have more direction!” Or “I love how this character acts in y fic, but it’s not how things play out for them in my fic, and I want there to make a satisfying written reality out of what happens in my imagination, just like the author of y fic did!”

Unorganized thoughts but I just wanted to write em down before I forgot/procrastinated too long!

Do you have any advice and how to write a long fic?

I'll encourage long fic writers to add on in the notes, but as someone who tends to prefer short and medium-length fic, I'll tell you how I go about it.

Get a premise that you just absolutely love. You're going to be writing this thing for months, if not longer, so you want it to be something you're willing to spend a lot of time thinking about.

Embrace subplots. You'll have your main plotline that you want to see through from beginning to end, but you can also weave in some subplots here or there. The way I do this so that I don't get lost down a rabbit hole is that I always make sure that every chapter has at least 1 thing that moves the main plot forward and then if I want to spend 1-2K with some side characters doing something fun I can do that as well. Subplots can extend for the length of the full narrative, but they can also just last a chapter or three. If you're used to writing short fic, these might give you that familiar feeling of "completion"

A chapter is only as long as it needs to be. Don't get hung up on having a consistent chapter length. Don't get hung up on hitting some arbitrary number every time. Instead, figure out what the next part of your story needs to include and write however many words it takes to get that chunk across. Varying your chapter lengths is a normal thing to do and not something to stress about.

The next thing that I find important personally may or may not be relevant to you, but I find that I can't plot anything in much detail. If I get too into the nitty gritty with my plotting, it just feels like I've already written it. I need to keep it at the level of "And then A and B meet C and hijinks ensue." I can figure out the particular hijinks later. It's the characters meeting up that's the next important thing for me to figure out. Getting too far ahead of myself is a death knell for me in writing long fics, but there are other writers who swear by it. Test out different ways of approaching it and see what works for you.

As someone who tends to write more briefly, another feature that's common to longer fics is more extensive descriptions. People spend time painting visual pictures of the setting or the characters or the actions that are happening. Write the more bare-bones style that focuses more on dialogue (if you're like me) and then go back and read through what you've just written and see if there are opportunities to add in more detail. This can lead to some really interesting characterization choices and also help you out with worldbuilding.

When it comes to worldbuilding, you don't have to get it all on the page. You just need to share what's relevant for the reader in that moment and what is useful to lay out now so that it's already there in a future chapter. You can have an encyclopedic knowledge of how your world works in your head, but it's not actually necessary. No one is going to be quizzing you later - and if they do, you can always figure it out at that point.

Most important for me when I'm trying to get myself to the end of a longer fic, have a friend or a group of friends who are also into what you're writing - or at least willing to hear you get excited about it. Being able to get excited about your work is so important. It's like a bottle of water being handed to you on mile 10 of a marathon.

[amoristt]

Grazing the Fire | IV

well hello. here i am, four years later, once again enamored with nathan enough to finally dust this baby off and pick up where i left it. im a little rusty so bear with me this chapter! much more to come <3

reblogs + tags and replies will make my entire day as i put a lot of effort into this :)! it also helps motivate me!

story continues beneath the read more. let me know if you can’t access it!

Warning: language, very vague s/a mentions

want to support me? heres my kofi!

__________________________

“Alright class, who can tell me,” A board stick clacks against the chalkboard. “Who can answer problem four?” 

A few hands raise in the corners of your eye, but yours remains atop your desk. Eyes far away, mind in a murky haze and almost completely unaware. All you could focus on were the memories playing on repeat within the confines of your tired, tired brain. Hours ago, you were warm, you were comfortable. Safe.

Cheeks heated to a dusting blush when you remind yourself just how you had awoken that morning. At some point in the night, an angel had blessed you. Allowed you to wake up wrapped around none other than big, bad, Nathan Prescott. Your face nuzzled into his chest, broad but wiry hands pressed firmly over your shoulder and his arm slung over your waist to keep you against him. Thankfully you had been the first to wake up, blinking away the morning sun blazing through his blinds and painting the room stripes of gold. At that moment, before your headache came crashing down onto your skull, you were astounded by him. 

Eye lashes brushing the top of his cheeks, his lips parted ever so slightly, chest rising and falling rhythmically. In that moment, there was no anger, no bitterness. Just a soft and peaceful slumber. It was like being the sole viewer of a magnificent painting- each stroke and detail placed just there just for you to pick out, to remember the curves and sharp edges down to the very foundation. From his unkempt hair down to the way his hand flattened onto the mattress where your indent still lived. Nathan was so beautiful like this. 

For a long time you stayed there. It was as though you were afraid to move- you couldn’t bear to disturb him. You had wondered, if he was always like this, so at peace, what would he be like? Likely soft voiced, mild mannered. He’d do his school assignments without hassle and donate to the charity board. He would wander the town with his friends and listen to music in a beat up truck flying down the stretch of highway overlooking the bold, blue, and beautiful ocean. An entirely different version of himself- carefree, and a fair blue as opposed to a burning flame of red. 

But, if that were the case, you’d never have gotten here. You’d never been both the outsider, and the only seeing eye. A lucky, albeit firstly unwilling witness to the display of depth before you. 

It never hit you like it had quite in that moment how lucky you were.

But- just then- an alarm disturbed what serendipity existed. You nearly leapt out of your skin, clutched your hands to your chest at the sudden sound. A headache wove its way into your once untouched temples. Nathan groaned, mumbled, ‘god damn it’, under his breath, and thus his body was reanimated into life. He rubbed his eyes and he stretched, that familiar scowl coming over his eyes and lips as he took in the sunlight damn near blinding him. A polar opposite to the being you’d appreciated just moments earlier.

“Ugh, fuck, how the fuck is it seven already.” He groaned. “I feel like shit.”

“Well good morning to you too,” You started, welcoming Nathan into the world. “‘I’m feeling pretty shitty as well.” 

You said that, but really… You were more than alright. Your head had hurt, slight nausea crept into the wells of your stomach, but other than that you’re sure you were phenomenally better than you’d have been waking up whereverTate would have left your ass.

“You need to get outta here, before everyone gets up.” Nathan drawled, but he didn’t sound as urgent as you expected him to be. You’d expected him to be angry that you were still in his room, but instead he just… accepted it. 

You snickered, climbing out of his throne of a bed. “Wow, you’re giving me the morning after treatment?” 

“Sure am. Get outta here, whore.”

“Oh fuck you.” 

You located your heels from last night, resting upright near his dorm room door. Heels didn’t sound like the most  practical to sneak out of a dorm with, so you instead opted to grappling them by the straps and carrying them at your side. Hair a mess, outfit riddled with wrinkles and makeup smudged under your eyes, you stood before Nathan in all your glory. He stared at you for a long, odd moment- and you for some reason felt exposed, or even, shy. 

“What?” You ask expectantly, placing a hand on your hip. 

His eyes trail to your line of vision. He shakes his head. “Just thinking about how now you really do look like my morning after.”

“Yeah?” You hummed. “Find it hard to believe you get a lot of those.”

Nathan shoots you a suggestive glance. “You’d be surprised. Everyone wants a piece of Prescott.”

Surely, he was joking, or maybe he wasn’t, but you… Didn’t like hearing that. It made your stomach feel odd, uncomfortably heavy.  As he stood up, reminding you how many inches he had over your size, you swallowed and cleared your throat to flush out that crappy feeling. “Well,” you started, mood having dropped. “I’m gonna go, then.” 

“What got your panties in a twist all the sudden?” He asked, raising a brow and pulling some clothes from his closet, tossing them onto the bed.

The bed you two had shared.

You hated the idea of his morning afters- whoever they may be. 

“Not feeling great. Probably a side effect of the roofies.” You mumbled.

Nathan breathed a laugh. “Probably.”

He seemed so calm, right now. Perhaps due to it being so early, before the outside world had a chance to remind him just why he was so uptight all the tight. Before he needed to be so uptight all the time. He really did have so many versions of himself- all of whom you were slowly becoming familiar with. Compared to the person you’d believed him to be before your run ins, you’d never have assumed someone so dangerous could be so soft as last night, as this morning. In the beginning, you’d feared him. Avoided him like a plague, or a wild animal. Even when you were enraptured in the existence of him, you still wanted to keep away. You’d never have believed someone like you could wake up clutched to his chest, as though he were afraid if he released you, you’d be gone long before he woke. 

Then, a sudden thought struck your mind. 

He’d held you so tight. He’d welcomed you in the morning. No anger, no annoyance. His soft laugh at your banter and taunts. How your heels were standing upright instead of tossed haphazardly into some random corner, where he’d watch your struggle to find. 

How he’d stayed awake to ensure your sleep.

“So are you just gonna stand there?” Nathan called you back to reality, hands gripping the hems of his shirt. “I gotta get ready and you need to wash up so you don’t look like a five dollar stripper.” Cruel words, but with absolutely no bite. You rolled your eyes.

“Yeah. But, hey,” You started. “Thank you for last night.” 

“Yeah, yeah. You gotta start learning to watch your own back.” He says. “There’s gonna be times I won’t be there to drag your ass out of the fire.”

If you’d been charged, if you’d been stricken with a strange defensiveness, you’d have retorted, ‘than stop helping me’, but… Instead you allowed yourself the comfort of protection. You allowed Nathan Prescott to watch you.  

“I know,” You reached for the door. “Thank you.”

With that, you bounded out of the dorm silent as a mouse. 

-----------

In hindsight, you should have left earlier. Class was merely 15 minutes away when you slipped out of Nathan's room and bounded towards the women's dorm. Albeit not exactly a long walk, by the time you discreetly snuck back into your own dorm, you had roughly twenty minutes to somehow pick an outfit from your countless unopened boxes and make yourself even slightly presentable. 

Wiping off whatever make-up you could get and reapplying it, brushing out the tangles of your hair and nearly tearing off your scalp in the process, scattering your nightclothes over your floor and managing to scrounge out a semi-decent outfit for the day… You still looked a mess. If the mirror could laugh, it would have. Black mascara smudges under your eyes and frizzy untreated hair. What a lovely look. 

You’d made it to class just five minutes late, but those five minutes were all it took for all eyes to be on you as you tried to slide into the classroom unnoticed. A couple classmates whispered to their table mates as you passed by, smelling of oversaturated cherry blossom perfume to hopefully cover the scent of alcohol. You sauntered to your seat and sank down with all your weight, suddenly exhausted. You’d made it with just five minutes tainting your record of attendance. The teacher greeted you with a disappointed sigh, and thus, the day began. 

But, it was so hard to focus. All you could think about was Nathan. 

“Alright class, who can tell me,” A board stick clacks against the chalkboard. “Who can answer problem four?” 

You lowered your head. 

“Ah, how about, ___?”

You snaked back into reality, blinking up at the chalk board that was somehow already riddled with math equations. Since you hadn’t been paying attention even in the slightest, your mouth gaped wide open, eyes scanning for something you understood even slightly so you didn’t look like a total idiot. 

Sadly, you were out of luck. The teacher shook his head. “I’m shocked,” He said. “You're normally so on top of things. Oh well.”

“Oh, I’m sure she was on top of things,” A female voice sniggered behind you “Last night.”

Your face flushed a red, hot, ruby. What the hell was she talking about? How had they found out you were with Nathan? You were so sure of being sneaky, there was no way-

“Her and Tate totally got it on last night.”

You whipped around in your seat, facing girls who looked to be clones of some sort. Both with the same dark eyes, short brown hair, and freckles. “What?”

“Alright-” Your teacher blurted. “That's enough. April, May, enough. Let’s not discuss things outside of the classroom.”

The two girls batted their eyes. “Sorry sir.” One spoke, twirling a hand through her hair. Her sister's wide toothy grin never fumbled. 

“Back to it then. Kate, can you help out __ with number four?” 

The small, blonde girl nodded quickly, brushing a lock of hair behind her eyes and offering an empathic nod. 

As you turned around in your seat, her answer fell on deaf ears. Your heart was racing in your chest, hands balled into fists while you stared ahead blankly.  

They couldn’t seriously think that you chose to leave with Tate, could they? Surely someone must have seen the state you were in. Someone other than Nathan.

The clock ticks forward but time feels like it's passing almost unnaturally slow. With just 10 minutes left, you feel your phone vibrate in your pocket.

‘Nathan: consider ur favor officially returned 

Your tongue poked from your lips, the tiniest of smiles taking over your once sullen features. Terrible thoughts and worries flew out the window while you type back, ‘damn. here i was gonna to ask you to do a backflip off the roof with me. there goes my plans.’

Nathan types for a moment. Typing, stopping, typing again. 

‘Nathan: soundz like a blast. where and when?’

A small blush heats your cheeks. ‘very funny. thanks to last night i have an entire 24 hour session of studying to catch up with.’

His response is almost instant. ‘Nathan: boringgg. txt me when ur fun.’

Rolling your eyes, you shove your phone back into your pocket. It seems you’ve been able to secure enough of a friendship with him for some mindless banter even outside your little visits. You smile. He’s… Fun to talk to. Surprisingly. 

Class comes to an end and you start to pack up the books and papers you’d hardly even glanced at the whole period. Whatever had been upsetting you before is lost in your mind while you think of the morning, the night before. All the things in-between. But, your happiness doesn’t last long. As you get up, you’re almost forced right back into your seat as a weight shoves into your shoulder. Your books scatter to the floor. April, the one who’d remarked about you earlier, glares at you in what looks to be disgust. 

“Careful April,” Her sister hums as she saunters past you, keeping distance and raising her already shrill tone of voice. “Might wanna watch where you’re walking- I’d hate for you to catch something from this slut.”

You absolutely gawk at her. “What the fuck did you just say to me?”

April scoffs. “Oh come on, like everyone doesn’t know what you were up to last night.”

“Sleeping around isn’t a good color on you.” May hikes her bag over her shoulder and snickers at you. They both leave the class together, sickeningly in sync. You’re left stunned where you stand, unsure how the hell your life came to this so quickly. How you’ve stooped so low that the daughters of the world's most uncreative parents are able to bully you based on something that didn’t even happen.

Next class goes no better. The person to your right, a jockey looking brunette guy, asks, ‘have you ever heard of a Tate?’. You say no, that that’s the dumbest name you’ve ever heard. The idiot grins and goes back to marking down likely wrong answers on his test sheet and you debate kicking the leg of his chair out- but you don’t to avoid even more eyes on you. It makes you sick to your stomach- even more than recovering from the roofies does. How can everyone believe it? You barely even knew the guy and you were clearly uncomfortable with his advances. No one saw that? 

After everything you’d worked for to build a reputation, trying so hard to not call out peoples shit for the sake of seeming friendly, tainted over something that didn’t even happen? And the kicker was that it hadn’t even been your fault! He’d drugged you, he’d have taken advantage of you! Yet you were the bad person? 

Class came and went in the blink of an eye this time. Your mind wrapped up in the situation, your stomach churning. You wanted the day to be over with but you still had 4 more classes to suffer through. Why was this happening to you? Was Tate being treated just as horribly, or was he getting pats on the backs of his unaware friends?

Wandering down the halls to your locker, you noticed Lance and Kaz hanging around one of the drinking fountains. Your nerves quelled- your friends would surely make you feel much better. Especially since they had witnessed how awful you were feeling as you left. You approach with a relieved smile, ready to say your truth and finally have someone on your side.

“Hey guys.” You smile, but Lance looks down at his feet while Kaz places her hands to his hips. Your smile fades.

“You could have told us you were gonna spend the night with Tate,” Kaz snaps. “You didn’t need to lie like that just to leave. We were all worried about you and it was for nothing.”

“What?” You feel like you could cry. “No, Kaz, I really did try to leave. Tate tried to drug me and take me home, and-”

“He wouldn’t do that.” Lance interrupts, with a frown. He looks back down at the floor with knitted brows. “I’ve known Tate since before time. He wouldn't do something like that, especially not to one of my best friends. Plus he told me he was really into you. Why would he even try?”

“Are you serious?” You sputter. “You think I’d lie about something like that?”

“You’ve been lying about all sorts of things!” Kaz huffs. “What’s going on with you lately? You’ve been so distant, and secretive. What are you hiding that’s making you lie like this? We’re supposed to be your friends and then you lie to our faces just to go and fuck the first guy that shows you attention.”

“What…?” It was like acid. It was like the rug had been pulled from your feet sending you spiraling down the unending cliff. Kaz, your best friend, all that venom. How could they turn against you like this? What the hell is going on? You felt your throat tighten. “Look, I’m sorry if I’ve been distant, but I’m not lying to you, I-”

“We gotta go.” Lance isn’t in the mood to hear it. “We’ll catch up to you.. Some other time.”

Kaz says nothing as she pushes past you. Lance, at least, spares a short glance over his shoulder. You stood there alone in the hallway, your bag falling off your shoulder and clattering onto the floor with a thud echoing off the walls. Everything you had, all gone at once. 

No one believed you.

---------

With nowhere to go where you felt like you could truly allow yourself to process the day's events, you went to the only place you knew. 

Just outside of campus, where rocks lined the edge of the boundary, overlooking the outskirts of the town and the ocean stretching as far as the eye could see. You settled yourself there, staring at the vast waters and wondering how this had all happened. Unlucky didn’t even begin to cover how it felt. Not only did you feel violated with Tate attempting to do unthinkable things with your unconscious body, but you also felt alone, and walked on. Your best friends hadn’t believed you. While Lance seemed saddened, Kaz was so… Angry. Her words cut like knives into your skin. 

It wasn’t fair. It wasn’t fair. You didn’t deserve this.

You want to talk to Nathan, but knowing him, he’d see your state and bounce instantly. After all, this isn’t exactly very fun of you.

As the sun began to fall, splaying orange and blues over the wide open sky, behind you, you could hear voices. A group of them, some male, some female. Memories of when your notebook had gotten snatched by those two horsed face assholes came flooding back and with all your alertness, you stood up, and decided that this sitting place was no longer safe. Nothing was.

Before you even made it ten feet away, the group had found their way to your spot and gotten comfortable, one of the girls cheering, ‘this’ll be our hangout! look at how pretty the view is!’

You took a short drive down the stretches of road and decided that if you were going to lament in your own sadness, you were at least going to do so in a place that had something to cover the sound of your tears. Plus a nice view.

The beach, littered with its picnic tables and the sounds of crashing waves would suffice just fine. So, you pulled in the desolate parking lot and wandered down the sandy shores until you stumbled upon a picnic table shaded by a large willow cascading lushious branches to block out the sun- a perfect canopy for you to wallow under. 

You had nothing at that moment. No friends, no reputation, no one to believe your tragic tale. And now, you’d just lost the one spot that made you feel comfortable when stress was building into your body like concrete. Tears pricked into the corners of your eyes and you bit your lip, dreading that feeling of a lump in your throat. Why you? Everything had been going so well. How could not even a single person believe that Tate had tried to hurt you?

Well, actually, there was one person.

Of course Nathan believed you. He’d been the one to rescue you, after all. Time and time again it seemed.  How was it that even the ones closest to you would turn their back so fast, yet Nathan seemed to be there even when you didn’t want him to be? Even when you yelled at him, and he yelled right back, fire and sparks falling into embers around the two of you. 

In that moment, you almost felt like you could finally relate to him. A reputation based on lies and things out of your control, paired with a hardheaded attitude to try and combat all the assumptions. 

No wonder he was so angry. 

“Hey bitch,” A voice suddenly called, and you had a split second moment where you were terrified of once again being the victim of a cruel prank or some classmates boredom. “How about next time you have a pity party you don’t fucking call me in the middle of it.”

You blinked away your tears and through the blurriness saw a figure coming towards you. All that sass, the tone...

“Nathan?” You breathed. It only takes moments before he’s in front of you, holding his phone in view, seeing that the call that had been running for nearly ten minute. You flush in embarrassment, pulling your phone from your back pocket. “How did that happen?”

“Well, can your ass dial numbers?” He taunts, ending the call. 

“Damn it, dumb phone must have butt-dialed you. I knew I should’ve gotten a different one.” You mentally kick yourself. “It must have unlocked in my pocket.”

“You don’t have a password on your phone?” He taunts. When you shake your head, he whistles. “You are just begging for a robbery. I’ll keep that in mind when I’m in the mood to send random messages to all your buddies.” 

“Fuck off.” You scowl, and he grins, hopping up on the picnic table next to you. The sun flatters his skin. He’s almost glowing. 

“Speaking of buddies, how the hell did it pick my number out of your sea of friends?”

You shrug. “Probably cuz’ it’s a priority contact.” 

“Oh lala, I’ve been upgraded to priority huh? Does it display a superman logo whenever you give it a ring?”

“Nope. When I press call it rings the nearest asshole in my vicinity. The fact that it’s you is your own problem.”

“Haha, fucking ha.” He leans forward and rests his elbows on his knees. He stares out at the water, watching waves pull and crash onto the beach. It’s almost beautiful, until he ruins it. “Yknow, you’re a really ugly crier.”

“Wow, thanks.” You shake your head. “That's exactly what I needed to hear right now. Why did you even stay on the line?.” Wiping your eyes, you start to forget your tears. “Couldn’t have been that wild of a conversation.”

Nathan shrugs. “Between the crying and the sound of the waves it was pretty nice.” He grins. “Very educational.” 

“Awesome. Glad I was able to make your day.” It doesn’t feel like your usual bitey remarks. You’re tired, you’re still a little hurt and you can’t stop thinking about how such an amazing morning had turned into such a horrible day.

“So what’s got you all fucked up? Never seen you act like this big of a baby before.”

“Nothing. You already paid off your debt to me per this morning, so feel free to resume our regularly scheduled mutual hatred.” You say, lying through your teeth. You know you’re both past the point of hatred, but you’re feeling jaded, you can’t help it. 

“Oh shut the fuck up,” He groans. “I didn’t drag my ass all the fucking way out to this shit hole of a beach just for you to give me that bullshit. What, did you fail a test? No one matched you on tinder?”

“Everyone thinks me and Tate slept together last night.” You blurt. “I think he’s telling people me and him had sex.”

Nathan tenses his shoulders and grimaces. “Fucking werido.”

“I told my best friends that he tried to take advantage of me and they don’t believe me. One of em’ even said he wouldn’t do something like that.”

“Fuck em’. Who needs best friends.”

“And to make everything so much better, these two bitches that I share four of my classes with harassed me all goddamn day. I mean, fucks sake, how the hell are girls named April and May of all things able to get to me. It’s bullshit. And to make matters worse, Tate is just… Getting away with it.”

“Yeah well, something tells me that Tate’s gonna get a real nice fucking taste of medicine eventually. I just gotta find him first. He’s got a lot of nerve spreading shit around given I knocked his ass onto the pavement.” Nathan brows knit at the memory.

You test the waters. “Why would you do that for me?”

He seems caught off guard, or maybe, surprised that you’d ask. Maybe he thinks you’re both beyond that point. He grumbles, “Why does it matter.”

“I’m just curious. We don’t owe each other anything, remember?”

“Yeah, well,” He huffs. “Don’t ask me questions to shit I don’t know the answer to.”

“You say that an awful lot.” You tease.

“Yeah well you ask dumbass questions an awful lot. Not everything I do has to have some weird ass motives behind it, ___. Maybe I’ve got beef with Tate that’s outside of you.”

“Uhuh. Sure.” You’re about to say something else, when your phone lights up with a text. The display makes your heart fall all over again. 

Unknown Number: you should just pack up and go somewhere else. no one wants std’s from breathing your air xoxo

You don’t even know who that is. Now absolute strangers are on your case. You want to throw your phone into the ocean and leave.

Nathan scoffs. “Don’t even bat a fucking eye for that bitch, whoever the hell they are. Half the hoes you’ve mentioned have slept with half the football team,” he pinches his jacket, “and I would know.”

“Ew, Nathan,” You grimace, that same feeling from the morning returning. It feels, oddly, like jealousy.  He nudges your arm with his elbow and grins playfully. It’s cute.

“Chill, I’m just fucking with you. You gotta know even I wouldn’t fuck girls that desperate. I’m a man of class.”

That last comment actually forces a laugh from you. It’s soft, but it’s real. The first laugh you’ve genuinely had all day. “That’s horrible.” You remark, giggling again.

It's almost like the slight restoration of your mood puts him at ease as well. He leans back on his hands and stares off into the ocean, those sparkling waters under the setting, orange sun. “I’m for real though. Those hoes aren’t worth your time. One day when we blow this shithole of a town they’re not even gonna matter.”

Your brows knit, eyes blinking up at him. Had you heard that right? 

“We?” You ask, perplexed, albeit a little… Hopeful.

Nathan sputters. “Well- Like, when everyone’s older and-”

“You know what, it's fine.” You interrupt. “Fuck it. You’re right. We’re gonna blow this town and they’re just gonna be some shitty memories.”

He sucks in a shaky breath. You’ve never heard him scramble like that, like he’s been unmasked. The look he casts you when you agree, when you don’t tease or patronize and finally hop on the idea that yeah, what if the two of you really didn’t have to deal with it anymore.

What if the two of you could just exist, without the anger. 

You look up at him. “Would you actually do that though?” You start. “With me, of all people?”

He swallows. His expression is tense, but he’s not upset. He appears nervous, caught off guard. Nathan tries, “I-”

Your phone rings. Shrill, piercing. Mood destroying. 

“Jesus Christ, it’s my mom.” You grab your phone and Nathan looks forward, stone faced and silent as you hop off the table and answer. It’s your mother, who all but shouts into the phone that her and your father are taking a surprising visit to Arcadia Bay while they’re traveling by on their vacation. She insists that you be ready in about an hour for dinner, and likely there will be family photos. 

Which means if you still look as wrecked as you did this morning, you’re gonna have a lot of washing up to do. With a quick goodbye, a short and sweet, ‘love you’, you hang up and sigh. 

“You still tell your mom you love her?” He teases. “What are you, five?”

You frown. “You don’t tell your parents you love them?”

Nathan side eyes you, and just shrugs. It is all the answer you need, really, and for his sake you decide it wouldn’t be best to press the issue. Not now. But- it still makes your heart hurt just a little. You wished that he’d had it better growing up. 

“Right… Do you want a ride home?”

“Fuck no, what am I,” He shoves his hands into his pockets. “a fucking girl scout?” 

“I was just offering, weirdo.” When he doesn't get up, you feel like you’re missing out. Like if you stayed, maybe, just maybe, you’d get to know him a little better. “Hey, if you want, I can stay for a bit longer.”

He rolls his eyes. “You’re needed elsewhere. But,” he shrugs. “I don’t know. Fuckin’... Text me or something. Or not, I don’t care either way.”

There’s a small warmth in your chest that rises to your cheeks. He wants you to text him. “Yeah,” You say. “If I’m feeling fun.”

And with that, you bid him farewell, beginning your descent to the parking lot. 

“Hey,” He calls, and you turn just in time to catch a small item he’s tossed right at you. A tiny key resides in the palm of your hand. “Spare. If shit hits the fan again-...” He shrugs, and actually looks away. “Just don’t be too fucking loud of I’ll kick your ass out myself. No Madison needed.”

The widest grin plays over your lips. “I’m gonna re-decorate your room while you’re gone.”

“Ah, you fucking better not.” He shouts. “Actually- you know what, give it back.” 

“No, no! I’m sorry.” You play with the key between your fingers. “Thanks for this.”

“Yeah, whatever. Don’t lose it and remember- emergencies only. I don’t need you watching me sleep like fucking freak. We’re past that stage.” 

“How many times will I have to say I was never watching you. Christ… But, alright. See ya, then.” The key is heavy in your palm. 

You place it into your pocket and give him one last glance before you take off, leaving him to enjoy the sound of waves, birds, and the absence of your tears.

[thedumpsterqueen]

Standards of Performance, Chapter 3: Boundaries and Text Messages

Regular weekly update! Look at me go! This one took me ages to write for absolutely no reason, and then ages to edit because the AO3 text editor kicked my ass. Hopefully the formatting isn’t a dumpster fire, and hopefully you enjoy! Sidenote: you are always welcome to scream about Hotch, nsforwork or not, in my inbox.

Chapter 1, Chapter 2

AO3 Link

Summary:  You’re the BAU’s newest intern, desperate to prove yourself amongst an established team of much more experienced profilers. Agent Hotchner, the seemingly infallible team leader, sets strict expectations for your performance. He commands your respect without even trying, but is there something more to your relationship than a simple desire to impress your stony-faced boss?

Chapter: 3, Boundaries and Text Messages

Chapter Summary: You discover that the unsub isn't what he seems, and overstep some boundaries you probably shouldn't have.

Words: 2291

Rating: Explicit, 18+

Pairings: Hotch x Reader, Hotch x You

Back in Hotch’s hotel room, the three of you were sitting on the ground, surrounded by textbooks and torn-out pages covered in the seemingly mindless scrawls of the suspect. Well, you and Morgan were on the floor; Hotch was at the desk chair. Hotch wasn’t really a sit-on-the-floor type of person.

Morgan groaned and rubbed his temples for the third time in an hour. “It means nothing, man. He researched all this shit so he could commit the crimes in a way that would fuck with us.”

Hotch sighed and nodded in agreement. “It certainly seems that way. That explains the inconsistencies in the profile. However, we can still understand the subject by the signatures he chose.” He pointed to a scribbled note in a textbook section about the psychology surrounding different methods of murder: “Slashing throat? Effective + easy.”

He looked at you. “What can this note tell us about our subject?”

“Um, it doesn’t sound like the cause of death is important to him. Like it’s just something he needs to do. A necessity. Right?” you responded, somewhat unprepared for this sort of pop quiz.

“Exactly. And this tells us more about him. This isn’t about the kill; it’s about what he does beforehand. It’s about the rape,” Hotch said. “Don’t be so humble. You know more than you think you do.”

Your face felt hot, and you looked at the floor - an increasingly regular occurrence around him.

Morgan spoke up, still visibly exasperated. “If he spent so much time trying to throw us off, why did he pick victims that were so easy to tie to him?”

“He’s an idiot?” you offered before you could stop yourself.

Really professional. Holy shit, please shut up.

The faintest trace of a smirk graced Hotch’s face. “You’re not entirely wrong. He isn’t particularly intelligent, based on the information we’ve gathered so far. Not nearly as complex as we initially assumed.”

“Yeah, well, either way, he’s a nut. And Gracia can’t find anything about where he might be, and I’m starving,” Morgan said, standing up. “I’m gonna pick something up. You guys want anything?”

“Get me whatever looks good,” replied Hotch, focused on whatever written ramblings he was currently dissecting.

“You?” Morgan asked you.

“Just get me whatever you get him,” you said. “Thanks, Morgan.”

Morgan nodded and grabbed his jacket. “Be back soon.”

He closed the door, leaving you alone with your boss that you definitely didn’t have an erotic dream about the night before. You tried to focus on the textbook, but the words swam. After a few minutes, you huffed and set the book down.

“Shouldn’t we be looking for him right now instead of reading his weird psychobabble?”

Hotch looked up from his work with a raised eyebrow.

You continued, “I just mean, isn’t it more important to stop him from killing again? We already know he did it based on the stuff he wrote in the books, we don’t need to fully understand his motivations to confirm that.”

“Yes,” Hotch said, “but these offenders rarely cease their behavior out of nowhere. His appetite is alarming; he took three victims at once. We don’t know if those were even his first assaults or kills. Given that Garcia couldn’t locate any family or friends, we have no idea where he might be, so our time is best spent learning how to predict his actions and respond if someone else goes missing.”

He was correct, of course, but it just didn’t feel right - like you were sitting and waiting for something terrible to happen before you could do anything. Hotch must have sensed your frustration, because he leaned forward towards you, elbows resting on his knees, and continued in a slightly softer tone, “I know you feel helpless. We all do in situations like these. But trust me, we’re accomplishing more here than we would be trying to canvas the entire city.”

“I know,” you mumbled. “You’re right. It’s just, seeing the photos of those girls, knowing the type of person that’s out there, it’s hard to convince myself I’m doing enough just sitting here.”

“You’re not just sitting here, and you know that,” Hotch said, sternly. “You’re doing your job. People will die with or without us; our job isn’t to save them. It’s to catch the people that kill them.”

“But how do you deal with it?” you asked, growing more bold than you probably should be. You weren’t just asking about this case anymore, and you weren’t sure whether or not you wanted him to understand that. You wanted to ask him how he did it - how he woke up every morning alone, how he suffered an unimaginable loss at the hands of some of the purest evil society could produce and went back to the job that showed him more of that evil every day.

Judging by the hard set of his jaw, he knew exactly what you were getting at.

“I do it because I have to,” he said. Every word sounded measured, like he was explaining something he had dozens of times before.

“You don’t,” you whispered, but you knew you were wrong, at least to him. You knew he felt it was his responsibility to shoulder the burden so other families didn’t have to experience what he did. You had a background in psychology, and this was pretty low hanging fruit. A therapist would have a field day with him, but you weren’t a therapist, and you certainly weren’t in any position to tell your boss, a leader with decades of experience in the field, that he shouldn’t be taking all of this on.

He evidently didn’t find your comment worthy of a response, as he went back to picking through the pile of evidence. You’d hit a nerve though - his posture was more rigid, his almost-permanent scowl even more pronounced. The tension built with every second of silence, and you suddenly wished you could go back and erase the conversation.

Thinking better of trying to repair the damage you’d done, you kept the subsequent conversation focused on the profile. By the time Morgan got back, you had a fairly good idea of the suspect’s psychology, and after a quick break for fried rice and a video chat with the team, JJ set up to deliver a press conference from the police precinct in Vegas. Hotch switched on the news on the hotel TV, and you sat back to watch.

“The man currently suspected of committing the triple homicide that left bodies here in Vegas, in Phoenix, and in San Diego is an obsessive sexual predator,” JJ said to a waiting crowd of reporters and police. “He displays characteristics of a stalker, and women who interact with him may describe him as creepy or off-putting. Though murder is not his ultimate goal - in fact, he may not be completely comfortable with the act - he views it as a necessary step to dispose of his victims post-assault.”

“Do we usually do this?” you whispered to Morgan, “Release the whole profile publicly?”

“Nah, but with this guy, we want him to know we’re onto him,” he said back, trying not to disturb Hotch, who was watching JJ’s address intently. “He put so much effort into throwing us off, we gotta let him know we see through his bullshit. It’s the only play we got right now, considering we got no idea where he is.”

You turned back to the screen, where JJ had moved on to talking about the suspect. “His name is Ellory Matthews,” she said, holding up his ID photo. “He’s a 24 year old white male, about 5’9” and 200 pounds. We have strong reason to suspect he is involved and currently trying to evade the police. He is considered armed and extremely dangerous, so if you see him, please do not approach and call 911 immediately.”

Hotch, apparently having heard enough, stood up and turned off the TV. “Hopefully someone has seen him and can tell us where he is. If not, this should be enough to scare him into making a mistake.”

You tried not to think about the fact that a mistake still probably involved someone being hurt or killed.

“Get some rest. I’ll clean up here. Morgan, before you head to bed, call Garcia again and see if she’s found anything that can point us to where he might be.”

“Got it, I’ll let you know. Night, Hotch,” Morgan said.

You echoed Morgan and headed back to your room.

____________

After getting ready and tucking into bed, you found yourself completely unable to fall asleep. The conversation with Hotch kept replaying in your head - how resentful he’d looked when you asked him how he does his job, knowing that you were asking about it in relation to his family members’ deaths. He was a reasonable man, and you knew you hadn’t done anything wrong on the surface, but you shouldn't have pushed it, especially since the events you were referencing had been relayed to you by JJ in private. You weren’t even sure he wanted you to know about what happened to his wife and kid.

Shit, I might have really fucked up.

You rolled over and yanked your phone off the charger, and before you had time to convince yourself it was a bad idea, you sent him a message.

Me: Hey, sorry to bother you, I know it’s late. I just wanted to apologize if I offended you during our conversation earlier. You’re an incredible agent and boss and I didn’t mean to imply you shouldn’t be in the field for any reason.

You scrolled through Instagram mindlessly, waiting for his response, but he texted back almost immediately. Knowing him, he hadn’t even made an attempt to go to bed; he was probably still up reviewing the case.

Agent Hotchner: I understand. No need to apologize. I knew you’d hear about what happened sooner or later, and it’s natural to question my judgement, considering. I hope my actions in the field haven’t done anything to lend credence to that concern.

A weight lifted from your shoulders at his response, knowing he wasn’t angry with you.

Me: No, not at all, Sir. You and the team have been incredible and I’ve already learned so much. If I ask a question, please know it’s for my own learning rather than questioning your decisions!

Agent Hotchner: I’m glad to hear that. Please always feel free to ask questions.

Me: Thank you so much! Will do!

Satisfied with conversation, you set the phone back on the nightstand and rolled over. A few moments later, though, it buzzed again, and you looked at the screen.

Agent Hotchner: “Sir” is a little formal for text messages though, isn’t it?

You blinked, struggling to process the tone of the message. Was Aaron Hotchner making a joke? You messaged him back hesitantly.

Me: Can never be too formal! :) Is there something you’d prefer?

Agent Hotchner: Oh, I’m sure you can figure something out.

Your eyes widened at that, and you sat up in bed, staring at your screen. If you thought he was messing with you before, this was more; this was almost… flirting.

Ok, let’s not get ahead of ourselves here, you thought, trying to calm your embarrassingly high heart rate. He’s older. Way older. He probably doesn’t text that much, and he probably doesn’t realize how that came off.

Me: I’ll let you know when I do.

Agent Hotchner: Please do. Sleep well.

You placed the phone back on the bedside table, almost shaking with adrenaline. What was wrong with you lately? First you have a sex dream about your boss (who’s old enough to be your parent, you might add), and now you’re freaking out because he texted you something that could possibly be, in some interpretations, construed as flirting.

Hotch was attractive, of course. You’d have to be an idiot not to admit that. He was handsome in a way you didn’t see often - not the obvious, in-your-face stunning like Morgan was, or even the adorable, put-together look that Reid gave off. Hotch was old-school handsome, like he should be in a black and white movie smoking a cigarette while his doting wife made him dinner.

Or something. It’s not like you’d thought about this before.

But even if he was handsome to such a degree that seeing him with two buttons on his dress shirt undone nearly gave you a heart attack, leaning into this fantasy you were unconsciously creating where your relationship was anything more than boss and intern had the potential to destroy your career. Hotch could read people like a book, and if you were unable to conduct yourself normally and effectively at work for any reason, your internship and aspirations would be tossed out to the street.

Time to stop being an idiot.

Sometime during your mental dissection of the text conversation and its implications, you must have fallen asleep. You were awoken to a still-dark room and someone gently squeezing your shoulder, saying your name.

“Wha- oh, it’s you. I’m so sorry, did I miss something? What’s going on?” you asked, still not fully conscious.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you,” Hotch replied, standing over you. You were suddenly thankful for the dark room and the blanket that were covering your lack of pants. “I tried calling you and knocking, but you didn’t respond. I figured you’d forgotten to turn your ringer on.”

“Shit, yeah, I did. I’m so sorry,” you said, sitting up. “What did you need?”

“It’s Ellory Matthews. Police caught him trying to kidnap another girl. He’s in custody.”

[johnnycranes]

[reupload cuz i decided to post this chapter here as well since i met a lot of new people in the fc5 fandom recently <3]

next chapter of Some Kind of Second Chance is up. special shoutout to all my mutuals who tagged me in WIPs and to the amazing @desertvvitch who motivated me to post this thing!!

Whole thing is up on AO3

Word count: 3,364

Chapter 6: Revelations and Rifles

When Sydney came to, part of her hoped the hit she took to the head also knocked her memory back. But nope, still didn’t know who the voices in her head were.

She opened her eyes and the first thing she saw was a wall decorated with different pictures of the Seed family and of Eden’s Gate. Next thing she noticed was that she was sitting on the floor and her wrists were bound in front of her to a metal pipe, kept in place with a ziplock tie.

She looked down at herself and saw she was still dressed in the shorts and tank top she was in when she left her cabin, the only thing missing was her jacket.

Looking around a bit more, it didn’t appear to be like any of the cabins in the compound. More like the inside of a trailer house. Something glinted on the floor and Sydney realized there were shards of glass littered around the room of what looked like a small trailer. If she could just reach out for a sharp enough piece, she could find a way to cut open the ziplock tie.

Whoever took her clearly didn’t think this all the way through, practically handing her a means to escape.

Oh shit, or was this some kind of creepy Saw thing? Either way she wasn’t going to stick around to find out.

She stretched her leg and started pushing a few shards towards her with her foot. Thankfully her captors were also kind enough to leave her sneakers on.

Sydney was able to drag some shards close to her when she heard a door open. She hid the shards under her legs quickly as the footsteps of whoever arrived got louder.

Two men wearing Eden’s Gate clothes walked into the room, sneering at her as soon as they spotted her. They didn’t look like anyone she knew.

“Good morning, sunshine.” The one with long unruly hair said.

“So sorry if we kept ‘ya waitin.” The bald one said.

Sydney shook her head. “Oh not at all. Just woke up actually. Comfy floor here.”

“The fuck?” Long-hair asked.

“You have any idea why you’re here, girlie?” bald one asked, and Sydney assumed he was trying to sound intimidating.

“Why bother? You’re gonna explain it to me anyway ri-”

The bald one slammed the butt of his rifle onto her knee. She groaned in pain, but made sure not to lift her leg so much as to make sure the glass was still hidden.

Hopefully they leave her alone again so she could escape.

It was safe to assume these two were part of the group of soldiers who didn’t like her. So Sydney’s only other option of getting out was someone in the compound noticing she was missing, unless of course the two idiots who captured her were actually smart enough to cover their tracks.

How long was she out? All she could tell from the light coming in from the window was that it was daytime.

“You have the guts to speak to us like that? After all you did, sinner.” Long-hair snarled the last word at her.

Sydney rolled her eyes. “Like I said, still waiting for you to fucking explain.” As far as she was concerned, they could even be Resistance agents in disguise who waited for the perfect chance to strike.

But then again, why target her and not the Seed family?

“You think yer so clever, fooling even the Father with yer fake amnesia bullshit.” Bald guy said.

Sydney huffed out a dry laugh. “Trust me, I wish it was fake. Maybe then I’ll know why you two assholes are pulling stupid shit like this.”

“Enough!” Long-hair yelled. “How dare you. How dare you think we can just accept you into our family, attend sermons with us, all because you supposedly forgot.”

“I did.” Sydney emphasized. “You can ask the doctor, he-”

“You just don’t forget the people you killed!”

Sydney froze.

She what?

The silence was deafening and that’s when the voices attacked. Screams, cries, incoherent shouts, gunshots, explosions, fires. They all invaded her mind.

Her blood ran cold, her hands started shaking and her head was throbbing.

She couldn’t freak out, not now. She tried to keep her breathing under control, long enough to ask, “What?” but it came out so pathetic and soft that she wasn’t surprised when they cackled at her.

Long-hair walked in circles around the room as he narrowed his eyes at her. “Killed. Put a bullet in their heads, threw dynamite at them, hell even cracked open their skulls with a fucking shovel!” He stopped in front of her and tightened his fists. “They were my friends! They gave their lives to protect the Father from you. And now he claims you’ll protect us?”

His fist collided with her cheek. He hit hard but it was better than him using the butt of his rifle.

Or actually shooting her with said rifle.

Sydney slowly turned her head back to face them, ignoring the throbbing in her cheek. She could thank him, actually. At least it distracted her enough to calm down a bit.

There were still so many questions she wanted to ask, but asking her captors may not be the greatest idea.

Their friends? So she killed people from the Project?

She instantly thought of Elena, Trevor and Benjamin.

Who did she kill? Why did she kill? And if she did kill people from Eden’s Gate, why was Joseph okay with her staying on?

Then she remembered the Father’s words the day she arrived at the compound.

So now you shall atone.

Oh fuck. Is that what she was atoning for?

He struck her again. “You are a sinner unworthy of joining us at Eden’s Gate! We will avenge our fallen brothers and sisters, we wi-”

“That’s enough, Kevin.” the bald one said as Kevin punched her once more, on the same cheek and Sydney had to spit blood out.

Kevin backed away from her to face his companion. “She deserves a lot more punishment for everyone she’s killed, Norm. You know that.”

Norm sighed. “We got lucky capturing her when we did. But people will wonder where she is soon so we gotta kill her now.”

Even though her face stung and she had to blink a few times for her vision to steady, she was conscious enough to hear what they said. Sydney knew she was running out of time. If she wanted to escape, she had to do it quickly.

With both her captors distracted and turned away from her, she shifted her legs, feeling the cool glass underneath as she inched them closer to her wrists. She dragged her hands down the pipe and closer to the floor, slowly so as to not get their attention.

Some of the shards cut the inside of her leg but it didn’t matter. She could bandage them up when she was free. She couldn’t bandage a bullet hole to the brain.

Sydney finally got one shard close enough to her hands. She stretched her fingers to grab it and fiddled with it as quickly and as subtly as possible.

Thankfully Kevin and Norm were still busy arguing.

“It’s not enough to just kill her and get it over with!” Kevin yelled. “She showed no remorse, so why should we?”

“Because if they catch us we-”

“Rook! Rook, you here?” All three of them froze when they heard a voice from outside the trailer.

Sydney didn’t know whether to feel relieved or frightened when she recognized it as Benjamin’s voice. She couldn’t just scream for help. What if he didn’t have a weapon with him? What if they shot him first? Or shoot her then him?

She hid the broken glass in her hand, closing it in a fist.

“Shit. I told you we shoulda killed her right away, Kev!” Norm hissed.

“Shut the fuck up and let me think!”

Benjamin yelled again. “C’mon, Rook. You better not have left the island.” His voice sounded closer that time.

Kevin took two shallow breaths and gripped his rifle tightly. “All right new plan. We kill ‘im both.”

Fuck this wasn’t good.

Sydney chanced using the shard again. She needed to get rid of them before they hurt her and Benjamin.

“What?” Norm whispered nervously.

“He’s gonna come in regardless.” Kevin said. “I’ll shoot ‘im soon as he opens the door. Then we shoot her. Ain’t that what you wanted?”

Norm shook his head. “We don’t kill our own, brother.”

“I’m the one doin’ the work. I’ll be the one to accept atonement for this. Now stay here, keep your gun on ‘er.”

Kevin left the room quietly… on his way to kill her friend.

Something inside Sydney snapped.

She saw visions of herself breaking necks and cracking bones. She couldn’t see the faces of those she killed, but there were so many. She could easily kill Norm now, free herself with the broken glass then slice his neck open or stab him in the vocal cords.

She knew she could do it. Then she could shoot Kevin easily right before he got to Benjamin.

She could.

But she wouldn’t.

If she was a killer before- and by the sudden wave of images that invaded her head, she really was - she wasn’t one now.

Norm wasn’t focused on her, instead staring out the room probably at Kevin, looking like a nervous wreck. And to think he took a cheap shot to her knee just a while ago.

Sydney took that chance to finally cut through the ziptie. She didn’t waste any time and went straight for a still fidgeting and panicking Norm.

No killing.

So she stabbed his hand with the broken shard before he could react and fight back. He screamed as he dropped his rifle and Sydney grabbed it.

She heard Kevin yell ‘What the hell!’ from out in the corridor but she ignored it. Too busy getting her revenge on Norm by slamming his head with the butt of his own rifle, effectively knocking him out.

She took cover by the wall beside the open doorframe and yelled “Benjamin you better have your damn gun with you!” at the top of her lungs.

“Rook?!” Benjamin called from outside.

Then she instinctively ducked her head when bullets whizzed by her. “You fucking bitch!” Kevin screamed over the gunshots.

She checked the ammo of her own gun and thanked Norm for having it fully loaded.

If Kevin was still inside the trailer, that meant Benjamin was safe. And she had to make sure that didn’t change.

“Stay where you are, Ben!” Sydney screamed over another hail of bullets.

“What the hell’s happening?” was his reply.

Kevin cackled, his footsteps getting closer. “Like you care what happens to my brothers and sisters. I’ll make sure you don’t hurt anyone else!”

Sydney gripped the rifle tight, and after taking a deep breath, she moved out of cover and saw Kevin with his gun aimed right at her.

Jacob’s voice rang in her head.

‘You’ve been a damn good shot since you got to Hope County.’

She shot Kevin once, in the hand close to his rifle’s trigger. Kevin dropped his gun, yelping in pain.

Sydney slammed her rifle onto one of his legs, causing him to fall over.

She stood above him, keeping her rifle aimed. She kicked Kevin’s own weapon away as he groaned in pain on the floor.

“Finish me off then. Release that Wrath within you.” He pointed at the tattoo on her chest weakly.

“Shut up.” she hissed.

“You can’t run from your past, sinner. You ca-”

She put the rifle away to bend over and punch him hard in the face, knocking him out. There, now she paid them both back for what they did to her.

Sydney stepped back until she felt a wall behind her and slumped down, taking deep breaths.

Her adrenaline rush was slowly fading and she could feel the stinging pain on her face again and how her wrists were sore from being tied up for God knows how long.

She heard a door slam open followed by hurried footsteps. She looked up and saw Benjamin, his pistol out.

“Rook?” he asked softly.

If Kevin and Norm were telling the truth and she did kill people from the Project, maybe everyone else probably knew. And the scene in front of Benjamin probably looked suspicious, what with her being the only one conscious among the three people inside.

“They kidnapped me. They were gonna shoot you so I escaped, knocked them out and-”

“Whoa whoa whoa, easy Rook.” Benjamin placed his gun back in his holster and raised his arms up peacefully. “I know you didn’t have anythin’ to do with this.”

Sydney could only nod stiffly, grateful to her friend. “How’d you know to look for me?”

Benjamin placed his hands back down, and knelt beside her. “Elena got worried when you didn’t show up for breakfast this morning. She went to your cabin to check in on ya but you weren’t there. She asked me to help look for ya.”

He turned to Kevin then back at her, smirking. “Though it looks like you didn’t need my help.”

“What time is it?”

“A little past nine in the mornin’.”

She rubbed her sore wrists. Ok so she wasn’t out for long. Bless Elena’s kind heart for worrying over her. Sydney made a mental note to hug the old woman the next time she saw her.

“Let’s get you outta here, Rook.” Benjamin said, standing from his seat. “Need to get some ice for yer face.”

She frowned and looked over at Kevin. “What about him? And his friend in the room over there?”

“Pfft, assholes’re outcold. I’ll send somebody to get ‘im when we get back.”

Which reminded her, “Where are we exactly?”

“Still on the Father’s island. We’re in a little trailer not too far from the compound.”

Sydney laughed dryly. “How the fuck did those two even sneak me out of there?”

“Bah, prolly while everyone was attending the early sermon. Jacob’s right, we got great guards but anyone could pass through if they knew what our church schedules are, dammit.”

Sydney lifted her head up hearing the redhead’s name. “Does Jacob know? That I was gone?”

Benjamin sighed. “No, not yet. The plan was to tell him if I didn’t find you around the island. Luckily these two idiots were too afraid to stray far.”

Part of her was relieved that Jacob didn’t know. It meant she had time to process this new information by herself first. If he were the one who found her, she might’ve exploded and demanded answers from him. What were he and Joseph hiding from her? Why were they hiding it from her?

Sydney took one more deep breath before carefully standing up, mindful of the small cuts she still had on her legs from the glass. She strapped the rifle to her shoulder and brushed her hair away from her face.

She nodded at Benjamin and placed a hand on his shoulder as he helped her stand. “Thanks, Benjamin. For not accusing me of attacking them. Wasn’t sure what you’d think when you walked in and saw two bodies on the floor.”

Benjamin chuckled. “Aww hell, Rook! I got your back, I know you ain’t gonna hurt any of our own, unlike the two fools you knocked out.”

She smiled tiredly at him before heading out of the trailer, Benjamin following behind her.

Outside, there were two Eden’s Gate trucks. She found her jacket in what was probably Kevin and Norm’s vehicle.

Benjamin guided her to the passenger seat of the other truck before getting into the driver’s seat himself.

He started the engine before turning to her and softly saying, “Hey, I don’t know what those two said to you but, you’re a good person, Rook. We know you’re atoning.”

Sydney let out a short sob, willing herself not to cry. She nodded, keeping her eyes on the road in front of her.

And because she didn’t trust her voice not to crack, she simply said, “Thank you.”

--------------

It was a short drive back to the compound. Benjamin insisted she visit the infirmary first while he went to find Elena.

The doctor informed her nothing was broken. He gave her an ice pack for the swelling on her face to go down and disinfected the cuts on her legs. Thankfully the punches she took weren’t that strong, she only had a few bruises that should be gone in a day.

Elena practically busted the infirmary doors open, her eyes frantic until she spotted Sydney. The old woman looked like she was about to cry, hugging Sydney tightly. Sydney couldn’t help but hug her back, thanking her for being one of the reasons she was able to escape.

When the doctor was done assessing her, Sydney was free to go.

“You need me to stay with you, hun? Just ‘til you fall asleep?” Elena offered as they walked back to Sydney’s cabin.

Sydney shook her head. “That’s very kind of you to offer but I’ll be fine, thank you. You’ve done more than enough for me, already.”

“Oh hush girl! Like I said, we’re family. Then I’ll be back later to drop off your lunch. You just lie down and get your rest.”

“Thank you, that’d be great.”

They went their separate ways and Sydney saw her cabin in front of her.

She would’ve been relieved if not for Jacob leaning on the door.

She felt her heart sink. As much as she wanted to talk to him about what happened, she needed time to go over her thoughts first, untangle the memories that had begun to resurface.

Sydney stopped right in front of Jacob, who stared down at her intensely.

“You look like shit.” he simply said.

“It looks worse than it feels.”

He brought his hand up to move the hair away from her face, surprising her. He whistled as he looked over the swelling. “Damn, that’s still gotta sting though.”

Her chest tightened as Jacob casually and gently touched her, staring at her with those piercing blue eyes of his that sparkled when he genuinely laughed.

Funny how just a few hours ago, she did see them sparkle and she heard that wonderful laugh of his that made her smile when she and Jacob were talking over glasses of milk.

Then she got kidnapped, found out she was a killer and they didn’t tell her.

She turned her head slightly and Jacob paused before putting his hand back down. “The doc said I should be fine by tomorrow.”

He was still blocking her way and Sydney was about to politely ask him to step aside when he suddenly said, “The guys that took you, they-”

“I didn’t kill them.” she hissed.

“Hey, relax. I know. Your friend Benjamin told me.”

“Then can I go? I wanna get out of these dirty clothes already.”

“Look, Sydney I just-”

“Not now just… not now.” Sydney said softly, hoping he wouldn’t push her further. She didn’t feel like exploding in front of Jacob and the whole compound.

She needed to be alone with her thoughts, settle the crazy mess in her head first.

Jacob sighed heavily before finally moving out of her way. “At least get somethin’ to eat.”

His arm brushed hers as he passed her. She didn’t look back at him as she entered her cabin and closed the door behind her. Ironic how the last time they parted ways, it was a completely different mood.

Sydney took a quick shower to wash all the dirt and blood off of her before putting on some clean underwear and dressing in an oversized white shirt with the Project’s logo on it.

Her cheeks and jaw began to throb painfully and she patted them with the ice pack she was given. She stared up at the ceiling and allowed herself to process what she learned earlier, hoping the voices in her head would cooperate.

[theobsessor1]

Drunken Noodle

Summary: Deceit should know better, going through with another one of Remus’s ideas. He thought it would have been a one time deal, just something for them that night to experiment with his more reptilian side. But he’s starting to regret it with the growing nest of eggs, and horrible uncertainty of feelings swirling in his chest...he might be in some trouble here.

Pairings: mild intrulogical, qpp demus, hinting at Lociet

Warnings: drinking, alcohol. hinting at slight alcoholic problem.

Word count: 3087

previous chapters ch.1, ch.2, (read on ao3)

(wish to support me buy me a coffee :3)

Chapter 3 of “Say Something” series

Deceit huffs, sitting partially slouched over the dinning table as he sips from his wine glass, munching on gummy rats that Remus had summoned him to help brighten his sour mood. Said creative side was currently sitting across from him going on about something or another.

Deceit wasn’t paying attention, just enough to mindlessly nod when needed, letting the side jabber and get his energy out while the snake side sulked. Hmm...maybe he should pay Remy and Emile a visit. He hadn’t gone to see them since...well, it’s been awhile. 

It took him a moment to realize that Remus had stopped talking, The Duke had turned to stare at the stairs of the subconscious that led up to the mindscape...Standing at the bottom of them was Logan, he was just there! Casually looking around the room where he stood. It’s quite a surprising site to see, no wonder it drove Remus speechless. Well besides the fact that he’s obviously rather fond of the other side. After a moment, Deceit clears his throat. “Can we not help you?” 

“Actually, yes. I wanted to talk to you about something.” Logan straightens his tie and clears his throat, brushing off the fact he hadn’t realized the two sides were at the table. “Oh?” 

“Well more specifically, the events that occurred during our discussion with Thomas earlier today. I wanted to apologise on the behalf of the other. They were rather dismissive of you, despite you bringing up some rather valid points. I..” Logan coughs. “You can say I understand to a degree the feeling of being brushed over, so to speak, and that I inf act do not condone such behavior especially to someone who is actually contributing and trying to help.” 

Deceit has to take a moment to collect his thoughts and form proper words through the fuzzy haze of alcohol... This almost seems like some joke. “...Thank you for the apology, though it’s rather unnecessary. You're not the one that needs to apologise, if you want me to be honest you deserve an apology more than me” he points at Logan with an unimpressed lift of his brow. 

The spectacled side sighs “Regardless, I bring the apology and regret that I had not attempted to get them to listen to you.” “It’s whatever. I appreciate it I guess.” Deceit mumbles, waving a hand concedingly and taking another sip of wine clearly not very concerned with this conversation. 

“I could tear out their tongues for you!” Remus offers, way too excited at the idea. Logan frowns shaking his head “That’s...very thoughtful of you Remus, but I don’t think that’ll be necessary.” 

“It would be more fun to shove them down the stairs, like a couple of really annoying slinkies” Deceit adds mumbling into his drink Remus snickers nodding while Logan shakes his head “I appreciate your offer and suggestions, but that’s still a no. We want them to listen, not get them hurt.” 

Deceit stands from the table swaying almost like a snake influenced by a snake charmer. “Well, that is much easier said than done. They’re bound to get hurt before they start listening to anyone.” He picks up his glass intent to make his way to the couch “You’ve said your apology, you don��t have to stick around any longer.” Logan raises a finger, opening his mouth to speak only to close it as he squints at the snake side as Remus gets up coming behind Deceit and scooping him up into his arms, spawning tentacles from his back to help properly support the side in his arms. Using one of said tentacles to slip the wine glass away from the snake sides reach. “Is he drunk?” 

Deceit hisses, attempting to wiggle from Remus’s grasp and snatch his drink back “I’m not drunk...yet...I think.” 

“...Do you intend to get drunk?” The logical side crosses his arms, frowning at them. Deceit shrinks down on himself guiltily 

“...Maybe…” 

Logan’s frown deepens as he shakes his head “I’m getting you a glass of water, have either of you eaten anything?”

Remus carries a definitely not pouting Deceit over to the couch where Logan had pointed for them to sit as the snake side replies “I’ve only eaten a few gummies so far.” 

“I ate ass!” The duke enthusiastically answers plopping onto the couch and still holding the grumpy snake side protectively in his arms and tentacles.

“He means a peach.” 

Logan huffs heading into the kitchen, making himself at home as he goes about sifting through the cabinets and fridge “I’m going to make the two of you something proper to eat, do either of you have any dietary restrictions?” 

Remus nods with a bounce, he knows the answer to that! “DeeDee doesn’t like mushy stuff ‘n I don’t like citrus.” Logan nods, filing that information away for later. He has managed to find a box of noodles and some tomato sauce, spaghetti is easy to make and hopefully satisfying to the two sides. It grows quiet for a while save for the sounds of Logan cooking, filling a pot with water and setting on the stove to boil with the noodles. 

Remus plays with Deceit’s hair keeping himself occupied as they await the meal. Something must be up, why else would the logical side have decided to suddenly care to apologize to him, to care if he was drunk or for that matter make them food?? Wasn’t he the one that usually would argue that they didn’t need it?

Deceit can’t help but squint suspiciously at the side, “You’re totally not planning something?” he hisses flicking his tongue out with his words. 

“Well, I”m planning to feed you some spaghetti and try to get you to drink some water to help keep you hydrated from your consumption of alcohol.” The snake side huffs knowing that was the logical side's so called plan. But he wants to know the real one! He opens his mouth to say as much but Logan continues “Maybe re-discuss points from earlier conversation with the others and Thomas since, well, neither of us got to share our opinions on the matter...If that is what you are asking?” 

Deceit sits up, turning around on the couch and propping himself up on his elbows to look at the logical side, eyes narrowed. That can’t possibly be all. There’s gotta be something else here, he’s sure of it. 

Remus finishes the braid he’s been working on, wiggling happily at his work before starting another. “I could think of some tasty things to do instead off boring ol’ talk!~” 

The snake side sighs “Remu-” “Oh! I tried that mushroom thing from Hannible! You gotta come check out the corpses with me!” 

“Re-” “The roots really did spread through the whole body! I got one of them to be oozing-” 

Deceit huffed snapping his fingers to focus the creative side’s attention, the duke’s mouth clicking shut and heading whipping around to find the sudden source of noise.

“I know you want to talk to him about all those wild ideas of yours dear, but do you think you can wait till after I interrogate him?” 

“Oh! Yeah, I’ll wait!” Remus nods his head like a bobble head, stilling as he goes back to focusing on playing with Deceit’s hair, a third braid in the making...he might be attempting to stick an eyeball in it...or a tooth. 

Logan adjusts his glasses as his brows furrowed in confusion, the glasses fogged slightly from the steam of the cooking pasta “Interrogate me? What for?” 

“Well see Logan, you never come down to this part of Thomas’s mind. Nor really have you ever shown an interest in our care, save for Remus of course when he’s visiting you but that's just a given.” he makes an offhanded gesture to Remus “So tell me, what is your true motive for all this.” 

Logan pauses in his task of stirring the pasta sauce “My motive?” 

“Yes your motive, I may be intoxicated but I can still tell when something is suspiciousss.” 

Logan tilts his head at the snake side, beginning to absentmindedly stir the pot again. “Have I been acting suspicious. I do suppose a divergence from usual patterns would make something seem suspicious and put you on edge.” he thinks aloud. 

He shakes his head, turning the heat off the stove and mixing the sauce into the noodles. “I have no secret motive, no ulterior plan, I am merely tired of the treatment and order of things...of course that’s now paired with the fact that I am concerned about your alcohol consumption.” 

Deceit rolled his eyes “Well the whole treatment and order is going to be harder to change than just coming over for a visit…” he moves from Remus’s grasp to lean over the back of the couch “And my so called alcohol consump-consumption is fine! I didn’t have a lick of it for a couple of weeks!” Of course that was because he wasn't about to drink such stuff while he was preg- for reasons, wasn’t drinking it for specific reasons he will not ever talk about...yes.

...for a pink and yellow, brown speckled reason currently in his bedroom hidden with the other one. 

Logan hummed, not convinced as he made plates, putting the finished spaghetti on dishes before carrying them to the table “Either way, you two are eating and then getting to bed. No shenanigans or schemes, whatever it is you two do when left alone down here.” 

Deceit can’t help but pout at that, he doesn't have plans for the night but still, he doesn't want to be told what to do and be put to bed like some child thank you very much. 

Remus finishes with the sides hair and scoops him into his arms again. “I can walk myself!” 

“I know” :D

Stuck being carried it seems, the snake side just sighs, there’s no use fighting Remus, they’re both touch starved as is and the dukes pentiant for just snatching and carrying people around is a constant. 

He gets gently deposited into his usual place setting at the head of the table, Remus sitting by his side and eagerly digging into the food...he does notably try at an attempt to be polite and use a fork as he stuffs his face tonight. 

Deceit sulks conjuring himself a wine glass by his bowl, eyes widening when Logan snatches it away and puts a glass of water down. “Excuse me?” 

“No more wine tonight. Water” 

Remus giggles at his expression, the snake side not used to someone trying to boss him around like this. 

He can’t help lifting a challenging eyebrow at the logical side “No wine?” Deceit waves his hand over the glass of water turning it into a glass of whiskey on the rocks “Fine.” 

Logan raises an eyebrow back, clearly unimpressed and frowning. He gives a huff taking the glass, poofing it out of existence and putting a glass of water down once again. 

Deceit flicks his wrist changing the water to vodka, his eyes sparkling with amusement as he watches Logan. The logical side huffs “enough” he snaps turning the drink back into water “you will drink the water, eat and then we can assist you to your room for re-” “No!” 

Logan sputters to a stop startled by Deceit’s sudden shout and looking to the snake side with bewilderment.

Deceit blinks before flushing lightly as he looks down at his place sheepishly, he hadn’t even realized he had stood, now seating himself back down. “Apologies...I um I would just prefer not to be in my room tonight.” he pokes at his plate with his fork hoping Logan wont see through his lie

“R-right.” Logan clears his throat, adjusting his tie in that lil tick of his “Well, then um we can make you comfortable on the couch then? Will that suffice?” 

Deceit quickly nods “yes, the couch will be fine.” 

The dinner seems to be rather dull after that, Remus and Logan going back to discussing what Remus had done in the imagination inspired off of the Hannibal episodes they have watched together. Janus watches them chatter fondly, the two animatedly talking and gesturing back and forth...It’s nice seeing the two enjoy themselves like this. Especially Logan, it’s not often you get to see the logical side light up like this. 

With a small hum he stands with his empty bowl taking it over to the sink without a word, not wanting to interrupt. 

He tries to walk past the table without being noticed, if he can sneak past he may be able to make an escape to the imagination and to his two favorite traits. Of course things never go as planned, why would they. Remus immediately perks up and the creaking of his chair is the only warning Janus gets before the creative side pounces, pinning him to the ground.

Janus sighs with a groan “Really? Remus why-” they both pause with confusion and looking to the dining table, hearing a small giggle and a snort. 

Logan was watching them, a hand covering his mouth to stifle the sound of a laugh, eyes full of amusement and fondness...they made the logical side laugh?!

Remus's eyes sparkle surprised that he got Logan to genuinely laugh! He beams excitedly at the logical side “You laughed!” 

Logan blinks, his cheeks turning a light shade of pink as he quickly lowers his hands “I-I um think you misheard.” 

Remus shakes his head quickly scooping up Janus and holding him out to Logan like one holds a feral cat away from themselves “No! I heard it! J-eh Dee-Dee did too!” 

Janus gives Logan a disgruntled look but nods, not appreciating how he’s being held “I did here it too. You do realize you can’t exactly lie to me right?” he flicks out his tongue at Logan as if to emphasize he can sense them. 

Logan sighs fiddling with his tie “Remus I don’t think it’s good for you to hold Janus like that. Why don’t you get him to the couch and I can get him some pillows and blankets from his room.” he suggests quickly in an attempt to change the subject. 

Remus nods, eyes still sparkling as he pulls Janus closer, of course it's a bit of an issue when the snake side is wriggling and squirming as if trying to escape. “No! Don’t you dare go into my room!” 

Remus takes a hurried step back conjuring his tentacles again to try and keep a hold of the snake side who's baring his fangs at Logan and hissing angrily. 

Logan flinches, face scrunching with confusion as he quickly puts his hands up “I apologize, I didn’t mean to over step! I won’t go into your room if it makes you uncomfortable.” 

Janus calms, going still in Remus’s arms looking a bit disgruntled as he gives one last soft hiss at Logan. 

Logan huffs and Remus turns around so Janus can’t look at Logan anymore “Welp I think Logan had the right idea, someone had too many silly drinks, bed time!” 

Janus whines “I did not have too many, and I'm not tired. Put me down.” 

Remus shakes his head dropping Janus right onto the couch “Nope, it's bedtime! I’m putting you to bed and ain’t nothing you doing about it.” Janus makes more unhappy noises before squeaking at the sudden weight of Remus flopping on top of him. 

“You're not even going to let me get comfortable?” 

“Nope” >:3

Janus huffs glaring at the ceiling of the living room resigned. 

Logan smiles making his way over “Maybe it would be best to let him get comfortable, I don’t think I’ll be able to sit with you otherwise.” he pauses “That is of course if it's alright if I stay?” 

Janus sighs as Remus quickly scoots off him “Might as well, you’ve made yourself at home thus far.” he sits up to move to the side so that Remus and Logan can probably cuddle, only to stiffen up when he’s suddenly squished between the two sides. 

Remus wiggles some before snapping his fingers and changing them all into comfortable t shirts and pajama shorts before wrapping Janus up in a blanket “You gotta wrap Dee up in a blanket so he can burrow and stay warm, otherwise you get a grumpy snek who can’t sleep.” 

Janus sputters glaring at Remus from his cozy blanket burrito“Don’t give away my weaknesses!” 

Remus ignores him, smiling at Logan “and squish him! He sleeps best when squished” 

Janus hisses as Remus leans on him more, and makes an offended noise when he is shushed by the creative side. And again when Logan leans on him next. He’s definitely squished between the two sides now. 

No escape! Damn it!

Remus snickers resting his chin on top of Janus’s head as Janus yawns, his forked tongue curling. Janus huffs giving a weak shove at the creative side. 

Logan watches fondly “You two seem...rather close? But I suppose that’s a given with the two of you living together down here for so long?” 

Remus nods “Something like that, and well-” he shrugs unsure what the right words would be “ I don’t know, I’m wild and feral and got no boundaries, and Dee’s the exact opposite, balance each other, I guess.” 

Logan nods, watching amusedly as Janus’s eyes grow heavy. 

“You would think that we would hate each other but we kinda just found our own system of things together that works for us…” Virgil used to be part of that too, but well...guess yeah win some you lose some or...whatever that saying is.

Logan hums resting his head near Remus’s “and...you don’t suppose...that I could possibly join this system? I um” Logan clears his throat looking away nervously “I um mean more so if its alright I keep visiting for the most part. You always visit me an-” “yes” 

Logan pauses looking to Remus 

“Yes, you can come visit, it’s not like we can stop you” Remus smirks at him “think of yourself as an honorary member here, i'll make ya a badge and everything.” 

Logan smiles before they both blink and look down, hearing soft sleeping noises coming from Janus, a lil bit of his tongue sticking out as he sleeps. 

Remus snickers at that, getting himself more comfy. "Heheh… sleeping snek…"

[artnerd1123]

Among Us: CR3WM8TS

Updates Required (part 2)

——————————————

With the ship launched and crew settled, it’s time to get to work. Which, for Bunbun, means updating. How smoothly that goes depends on the crewmates in charge… Bunbun’s hoping she’s in good company.

Featuring appearances by Junior, Laser, and Rose!

Among Us archive/askblog Fic chapters post

——————————————

Ok so originally I wanted to keep all this together, but decided it’d be better to chop it into pieces. That way I can keep my momentum, keep posting for y’all, and still intro y’all to the crew as things get moving! 

Yes, I’m aware this chapter is coming out 3 days after the last one. I do not control the will to write but my motivation knows no bounds rn! Enjoy the fruits of my hyperfixation labor lskjfsdf

                                                   ===+===+===

Mission Log 4

Ship Model: SKELD D34-H120 Designation: SUPPLY TRANSPORT, EXPLORATION AND DOCUMENTATION OF SECTOR G PLANETS Crewmate Count: 9 Crewmate Colors: DARK GREEN, WHITE, PURPLE, DARK BLUE, YELLOW, RED, LIME, BLACK, PINK

Location: SECTOR F Ship Status: IN TRANSIT Course: PLANET 326-OCE-894 - SECTOR G Systems:

Navigation: COURSE INLAID / STABLE / UPDATES NEEDED

Engines: UPPER - ONLINE, TANK 0.98 / LOWER - ONLINE, TANK 0.97 / ALIGNMENT UPDATES NEEDED

Reactor: ONLINE / FUNCTIONING OPTIMAL

O2: STABLE

Electrical: CALIBRATOR OFFLINE

Communications: ONLINE / UPDATES NEEDED

Shields: ONLINE / FUNCTIONING OPTIMAL

Weapons: TEMPORARILY OFFLINE  / FUNCTIONING N/A

Security: CAMERAS ONLINE / ALL FUNCTIONAL

Administration: MAP OFFLINE - UPDATES NEEDED / CONNECTION SECURE / SHIP FILES UP TO DATE / ALL CREW ACCOUNTED FOR

Medbay: EQUIPMENT OFFLINE - UPDATES NEEDED / FUNCTIONAL / CREW FILES UP TO DATE

Supplies: FULL

Storage Chutes: CLEAR

Vents: CLEAR

Notes: Many systems functioning on reserve power temporarily, as updates are needed. PINK identified systems in need of updates. PINK has commenced updates under DARK BLUE supervision. Updates still in progress. RED has been admitted to medbay for minor injuries. Other crew performing normal activities.

                                                  ===+===+===

The soft thump of boots on metal accompanied two crewmates as they meandered down the hall. Bunbun trailed after River, taking a look at her task list. The tasks from Reactor and Security glowed green. Five other tasks still remained white. More updates in one day than she’d prefer, sure. But she’d had a nice send off by the reactor monitor. Lemon’s kind words were only a minute behind her. And, if Lemon was right, she and River were off to meet his son. Hopefully he was just as friendly. 

River reached upper engine first. If his disgruntled huff was anything to go by, it meant there was company. He got himself settled near the doorway as Bunbun caught up to him. She stepped into the room nervously. Amid the hissing and noise of clunky machinery, she could just hear someone shouting. It took her a minute to locate the source- half hidden by the steam, a crewmate in a lime suit was waving near the system monitoring panel. Bunbun waved back hastily, moving closer to make out their words. “-ey! Hey! Over here!” the crewmate called, waving steam out of their face. “Got it! I’m here!” Bunbun shouted back. Squinting, she did her best to swipe away some of the steam, stopping next to the stranger. From the shock of red hair she saw through bits of fog, she had a feeling he was Lemon’s son. Though she did wish she could see him better. And hear him better. It was so loud and so misty in here. “One sec! Let me just- set this thing on low for a minute-!” He coughed, tapping at the monitoring panel. “All good! You do what you need!” Bunbun replied.  Soon enough, the clanking and roaring of metal died down to a low rumble. The mist cleared out as the noise quieted. Once it faded, Bunbun got her first good look at the crewmate. He had a bright green suit- lime, as HQ called it- and a brown paperboy’s cap. His large square glasses were still unfogging with the room. He had a smattering of freckles across his peachy skin, especially over his nose. The square of gauze taped to his cheek had a couple dark fingerprints against it. Oil, if Bun had a guess. As she’d noted before, his hair was just the same shade as his father’s- though it was longer and more tousled. He took off his glasses to polish them, giving a glimpse of dark blue eyes, and a brief glance at heavily pierced ears. He was definitely on the younger side for a crewmate. If she had a guess, he was out doing field work for space academy. He flashed a nervous smile at Bunbun, fidgeting as he pushed his glasses back on. 

Ah, she knew that look. Seems she’d found her fellow timid crewmate.

“Er- hi, sorry about that,” he chuckled sheepishly. “Things get pretty hectic in here, a-and i’m not used to other people doing engine maintenance…” “It’s ok,” Bunbun said, “I know how that gets, believe me.” “Eheheh, right… I’m, uh Lemon Junior by the way. But you can just call me Junior.” Holding out a hand, Junior tried for a smile. “It’s nice to meet you, uh…?” “Bunbun,” Bun replied, taking his hand for a gentle shake. “I take it you heard about the updates I need to do?” “Yeah, uh, I did,” Junior nodded. “Lemon sent me up here to help out after we finished refueling.” Gesturing to the panel, he looked to her uncertainly. “If, um, I’m allowed to ask… what kinda updates are you… y’know… gonna do…?” Bunbun was sensing a theme with the engine monitors on the ship. “Just a couple things to make alignment reports more accurate,” she explained. “The engines are a little old, so giving them an update just lets the records be more accurate. Helps HQ make sure they won’t need any big fixes.” Junior nodded along as she spoke. Relief shone on his face. That made Bunbun relieved too. Any soothing she could offer in the ways of tech was nice. “Yeah, ok. That’s ok. You can, um, do what you need to,” he sighed, stepping back. “Just let me know when you’re done updating here.” “Of course!”

With that, Bunbun settled in, once again, to take care of the software. She could feel Junior watching her as she worked. It wasn’t… horrible. It didn’t feel like how river watched her. More like those curious interns she encountered sometimes. A glance over her shoulders said Junior was keeping more of an eye on the screen. He looked away quickly when he saw her watching, looking like a kid caught with the cookie jar. He must have an eye for software, she thought fondly. Kid after her own heart. She moved to the side nonchalantly to give him a better view as she worked. She could see him smile out of the corner of her eye. One of her own tugged at the corners of her mouth. Maybe they could talk code later. That would be nice. Across the room, River was grumbling to himself. When he wasn’t staring holes in the wall or his fellow crewmates, Bunbun could hear him shuffling around impatiently. Engine aligning just took a little longer. The patch would have to be replicated exactly, after all. Can’t be too careful. River’s grumbly restlessness was more of a nod to his lack of patience. From Junior’s nervous fidgeting, he’d taken notice. “... um… you can wait outside… if you want…” Junior called hesitantly, looking to River. “Can’t,” River said bluntly. “Oh- why?” Junior perked up. “Did you need something?” River shook his head with a grunt. “Gotta watch the newbie.” “Er… oh.” The lime-suited crewmate seemed to deflate a little. “Ok. Just. Thought I’d offer,” Junior mumbled. “Whatever,” River snorted. Bunbun just bent her head lower over her tablet. The green upload bar ticked forward at a snail’s pace. Though the process only took a minute or two, it was still the worst part of working with tech. Not to mention the sooner she left, the sooner she could get River out of Junior’s hair. He was fidgeting with his hands enough that she knew he was self soothing. C’mon, c’mon… almost there… she begged internally. 

When the green finally filled the bar, she let out a long sigh. “Ooookay, upper engine’s all done,” she reported. “Thank the lord,” River drawled, exasperated. “All of it?” Junior blinked. His face lit up with awe. “Sheesh, that was fast!!!” “Well, yeah,” Bunbun chuckled, hiding a smile, “I wouldn’t be so highly recommended if I was slow.” “Fair ‘nuff, fair ‘nuff.” Humming contentedly, Bunbun turned back to the system monitoring panel. Oh yeah, she’d definitely talk code with him later. For now, she leaned forward to study what she’d just done. Now came the tricky part. Reuploading the exact same fixes on the other engine. How to go about this…? “Hey, Junior?” She asked, waving her crewmate over. “I have a quick question before I head out.” Junior tilted his head to the side, hat nearly slipping off his head. “Head out?” he echoed. “Well, yeah, I’ve gotta do the same thing down at lower engine. I just wanted to know if-” “Oh! Oh, nonono, lemme save you the trip-” Junior broke in. Rushing to her side, he reached for the manual alignment slider. “Y’see, I figured out this little loophole awhile ago- just a sec-” Bunbun watched with increasing confusion and concern as he expertly centered the slider, eyed the screen, and gave the slider a rather rough slam with his fist. The monitor sputtered a minute, and so did she. What was he doing? Where had her work gone??? “Wh- what did you-?” she managed to squeak, falling silent as her tablet made the distinctive thrum of a task finish notification. The screen stabilized a moment later. Junior pulled back, looking quite pleased with himself. “Aaaaaand- there!” he chirped, smiling. “I just sent your code down to Lower Engine. No need to walk down yourself.” “... how in the world did you… find that?” Bunbun wondered, baffled. “I-it’s an old system,” Junior replied meekly. “It was a bug my dad found out on accident awhile ago. We just found a way to make it useful.” “... huh.” Bunbun nodded thoughtfully. Useful bugs. An old idea, sure, but it worked just fine here. “Fair enough. Thank you!” “‘S no problem, glad I could help,” Junior beamed. “You ready to go now?” River called. “My legs are gonna give out if I stand here much longer.” Bunbun and Junior shared a look. They may have properly met a few minutes ago, but… well. They’d both seen enough of River. “Coming, coming,” Bunbun sighed. Waving at Junior, she plodded after her dark blue crewmate. “Hope the engines behave for you and lemon!” “Thanks, miss! Hope the systems behave for you too!!!” 

Behind her, the engine slowly started roaring back to life. Its noisy growling echoed off the walls as she followed River once again. It might’ve just been her optimism, but she thought the sound was smoother now. Meanwhile, River seemed to have chosen a path for her this time. They were headed straight to Medbay. The noise didn’t necessarily decrease as they approached. It just changed from machinery to voices. Bunbun could only make out the conversation once she got close. River had parked himself outside of the door, looking inside a bit warily. Bunbun hung back uncertainly. What was he waiting on? “Will you please sit still?” a voice begged, clearly exasperated.  “I’ve been sitting still for five minutes now!” another whined, equally as annoyed.  Curious, Bunbun edged around River to peek in the room. The medbay looked as it usually did- four beds and equipment in the back. The scanner and computer monitor looked a little old, sure, but they’d been polished so well they looked new. Movement from the back right bed caught her eye- it was the source of the voices. 

Sitting on the end of the bed was a crewmate in a red suit. Her pack was leaned against the footboard, a pair of red and black headphones sitting atop it. Both objects nearly got kicked over as the crewmate squirmed. Her straight dark hair was cut a little above shoulder length, a long swoosh of it nearly covering her right eye. Her brows were furrowed over her earth-toned gaze, expression quite put out. Her skin was a tannish beige, with plenty of bandages littering her face. Evidently, she was not a stranger to Medbay. A black choker was visible as she shifted again, grumpily trying to free her hand from another’s grasp. It’d been stripped of its glove, revealing some painful, blue tinted blisters. The one hanging onto the crewmate’s hand was wearing a white suit. Her long coppery hair was partly tied up in two buns, the rest of it spilling fluffily past her shoulders. Her bangs hung so low they almost covered her olive green eyes. Of course, the heart shaped glasses she wore did a better job of that. Bunbun admired how they matched her earrings, though- pink hearts adorned the crewmate’s ears. A flower pin was rooted near the right side of her head. She looked somewhat annoyed by her patient, but not angry. She was doing her best to maneuver her gently, giving her all the care of an electrician fixing sparky wiring. 

“Five minutes isn’t enough for me to examine your hand,” the one in white pointed out. “Rose, babe, come on,” the one in red groaned, “it’s nothing serious, just a little plasma burn!” “You may think so, but you’re not the medic, are you?” White retorted. “But- I- you-” Red sputtered. White raised a brow. After a minute or two of stumbling over excuses, Red’s shoulders slumped. “Ghhh. Fine,” she grumbled, “have it your way.” “That’s what I thought,” White said smugly. “Now, about that hand of yours…” 

A knock from the doorway drew everyone’s gaze instantly. River hadn’t moved from his spot, though his hand was now raised. He rapped his knuckle on the doorway a few more times. “Hey. Rose. Laser,” he nodded to white and red respectively. “Mind if we come in?” “Oh! River! And- you’re Bunbun, right?” Rose asked hesitantly. Bunbun nodded, giving a tiny wave. “Er, yeah. That’s me.” “Well, I wasn’t expecting either of you today!” Rose said, head tilted. “Come right in. I’ll be finished here in a little bit.” “Just don’t take the bed next to me,” Laser huffed at River. Rose gave her a look, and her patient stuck out her tongue. 

River walked almost cautiously into the room, going over to stand by the left side beds. He stood straight and proper there, hands by his sides. Bunbun trailed after him. She got herself comfortable leaning on an empty bed close to the group. Rose busied herself wrapping Laser’s hand in some gauze. The two whispered to each other- something about dinner plans- as she worked. Once all was said and done, the medic straightened back up. “Now! What can I do for you two?” Rose asked them warmly. “Nothing for me today,” River replied, nodding in Bunbun’s direction. “I’m supervising Bunbun. She can give you more details.” Bunbun blinked a bit at the sudden and calm introduction. That was the most polite response she’d heard River give all day. It honestly caught her a bit off guard. Scrambling to compose herself, she held her tablet close to her chest. “Um- yeah, I’m just g-going around the ship to update some systems,” she explained timidly. “Your ship is a little out of date, but i’ve got plenty of patches and software updates to help out.” “Ah! I was wondering when HQ was going to send someone here,” Rose sighed softly. “About time, if you ask me,” Laser snorted. “We’ve been needing someone to help this bucket of bolts for lightyears.” Rose gave laser a little pat in agreement. Even River seemed to nod, albeit he rolled his eyes a little. “Yeah, so, I’ve just got a couple updates to do in medbay. I’ll try to be quick, but… y’know. No guarantees,” Bunbun continued. “That’s ok! And entirely understandable.” One finger tapped her chin thoughtfully, her gaze bouncing around the room. “What needs to be updated in my little corner?” “Ooone sec-” Bunbun mumbled, opening her task list. There were two tasks listed in medbay. “It looks like just your scanner and computer monitors? If that’s alright?” “I don’t see why not,” Rose hummed. “Go right ahead, miss. Let me know if you need anything.” “Will do, thank you,” Bunbun replied. She’d hardly taken a step towards the monitors, though, when Laser broke in. “Whoa whoa whoa- hooold on a sec there-” Laser burst, holding up her hands. The action made her wince, but she made no other signs of pain. “You’re here for updates, right?” “U-uh-” Bunbun stammered, confused and alarmed, “y-yes-?” “Are there any updates assigned to Weapons or Shields?” Laser pressed. “Let me… check…?” Bunbun said warily. Looking down at her task list, she gave it a quick scan. Surprisingly, they were both absent from her tasks. Huh. Well, that’s odd, she thought. Out loud, she answered Laser’s query. “No, there’s n-nothing for Weapons or Shields.” “Yes!” Laser whooped, pumping her bandaged fist. An action she immediately regretted. Hissing in pain, she still managed a wide grin. “I told you guys updating your stations often was a good idea!!!” “You did say that, didn’t you, firecracker?” Rose chuckled softly, a gentle smile on her face. “Mmmmhm…” River hummed, lips pressed tightly together. “W-well, it does keeps the systems running up to HQ code, not to mention upping their efficiency,” Bunbun explained timidly. Laser gestured to her enthusiastically. “You! I like you!” Laser grinned, “cuz you get it!!!” “Don’t mean to interrupt, ladies,” River spoke up- almost gently, giving Bunbun another momentary bluescreen- “but Bunbun does have a job to do.” Luckily, Laser and Rose’s voices snapped her out of it. “Oh. Right. She does, doesn’t she?” Laser echoed. “Sorry bout that, Bunbun.” “Indeed she does,” Rose agreed. Smiling apologetically, she nodded towards the scanner and monitor. “They’re all yours for as long as you need, Bun.” Giving the two a grateful nod, Bunbun strode towards the scanner. “It’s no problem,” she replied, pulling up her code. “I’ll be done in just a tick…”

                                                 ===+===+===

The updates in medbay took much longer than expected. Around thirty minutes in total. There was a lot to get to. Not only did Bunbun find herself tripping over incorrectly stored files from previous medics, but the outdated medical system kept trying to override her new input. The whole thing was confusing, frustrating, and very difficult to work with. 

Fortunately, she found herself in good company. 

Rose’s level head and gentle tone helped keep her distress down, and she knew all the work arounds for the computer. Laser offered plenty of encouragement. River, to his credit, actually stayed quiet. He added input only once- when a security bypass code popped up. Other than that… nothing. He just sort of. Stood there. It was odd. But Rose and Laser were enough to distract Bunbun from it, and enough to keep her on task.

When she finally pulled back from the equipment, the other ladies gave a little cheer. “Good job, hon! It’s running like a model made yesterday,” Rose beamed. “You wrangled the hell out of that code!” Laser grinned. “That’s a perfect job in my book.” “Thank you, thank you,” Bunbun laughed, waving a hand. “You’re too kind- both of you!” “We do our best,” Laser winked. “Anytime!” Rose hummed. “... yeah. Glad you got that figured out,” River finally spoke up. Bunbun gave him a quiet nod of thanks. Was he just… warming up…? She really hoped so. Shifting in place, River jerked his head towards the door. “You ready to head out, Bunbun? Just a couple more stops.” Bunbun paused. Holding up a finger, she flipped up her tablet. Both the tasks she’d had for Medbay now glowed green. Perfect. She nodded quickly. “Yeah, I’m good,” she replied. “M’kay. Let’s get a move on,” River sighed. “See the rest of y’all around.” He turned to go, pace a little slower as he left the room. Bunbun waved over her shoulder to Laser and Rose. The two smiled and waved back, free hands gently entwined as they gave their well wishes. The sight left Bunbun smiling all the way down the hall. 

The more of her crewmates she met, the more at home she was starting to feel. It was… nice. Really nice. A good assignment so far. She hoped it’d stay that way.

[missjanjie]

Hold Me Tighter (Even Closer) | (3/?)

Title: Hold Me Tighter (Even Closer) Summary: A sequel to Hold Me Closer, Tiny Dancer. Brooke Lynn and Vanessa are back at NYU, but with new and improved positions. Brooke’s ready to start her career as a professor when, as fate would have it, she realizes her TA, Jackie, might have the hots for a student named Jan. The couple just might see it as a sign to give two new girls the love story they found in the same place. Word Count: ~2.9k (this chapter) / ~9k (total) Relationship(s): Branjie (Brooke Lynn Hytes/Vanessa Vanjie Mateo), Jankie (Jan Sport/Jackie Cox) Rating: E

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Brooke Lynn furrowed her brows and strummed her fingers against the table. “So, let me see if I’ve got this right – you invited Jan over to practice for her audition, got wine drunk, then dry-humped until she got off?”

Jackie nodded in confirmation, her eyes fixated more on her coffee cup than Brooke – she had to build back up to being able to make eye-contact. “Then in the morning she was gone and she left me a note,” she finished, holding the piece of paper up. “I really fucked up, didn’t I?”

“It wasn’t your smartest move,” she told her, trying not to laugh at the sheer absurdity of it all. “But if she just left like that, she’s probably just as scared as you are. Listen, the first day I met Vanessa was a mess. I walked her home from work that night, kissed her, and then literally ran away. She still makes fun of me for it.”

The story made Jackie laugh, but it caught her by surprise as well. She had always seen Brooke as someone so unshakably confident. “I guess if things worked out for you guys, all hope isn’t totally lost…” She took another sip from her drink and sighed. “I still don’t know how I’m going to face her in class on Monday,” she admitted.

Brooke reached across the table and put a reassuring hand on her shoulder. “Just focus on your work. I promise I’ll find something to keep you busy, okay?” As much as she wanted to continue her matchmaking game, she could see that the tension needed to diffuse before she tried to push them closer. Just because Katya lucked out didn’t mean lightning would strike twice.

Jackie’s entire body relaxed in relief. She was still anxious about seeing Jan again, but it meant a lot to know that Brooke was looking out for her. “Okay. Yes, thank you. I can work with that.” She nodded, then checked her phone. “I have to get going, though. I’ll talk to you later,” she said as she gathered her things, including the note that she tucked into her pocket.

Brooke smiled and waved her off. She stayed put, though. She was expecting Vanessa any minute now. They liked meeting here when they could, after all, it was the café A’keria recently became the owner of, the same one she’d started working in after the Starbucks fiasco all those years ago. It was sentimental to them now.

“Hey boo,” Vanessa greeted as she walked in, leaning over and giving her wife a kiss before sitting down. “Must’ve just missed Jackie, how’s she doing?”

“The poor girl is going through it,” Brooke shook her head sympathetically. “She and Jan got drunk and fooled around, and Jan left before she woke up. She left a Post-It or something.”

Vanessa frowned and shook her head. “Mh-mm, I hate Post-Its. If you’re gonna dip, send a text like a normal person,” she mused.

“Maybe she thought a handwritten note would be more meaningful,” she reasoned. “Regardless, she’s just gonna need some time to recover before we continue with any matchmaking shenanigans.”

Vanessa gave a firm nod of agreement. “Understood.” She sat quietly for a moment, strumming her fingernails against the table. “I wanna talk about the baby thing.”

Brooke blinked in surprise at the abrupt subject change but leaned in to listen attentively nonetheless. “Of course, what’s on your mind?”

“Listen… I know we got good genes and all, but I don’t wanna create a baby in a lab when there are so many kids that need a family. I had friends in foster care when I was little, you know? That shit must’ve really sucked for them. And I just think… You and me are in a position to really help a kid out,” she told her, then held her breath as she waited for her wife’s response.

Brooke reached across the table and held Vanessa’s hands. “Baby girl, if that’s what you want, I am a hundred percent on board. I think that’s a wonderful motivation to adopt. We can start looking at agencies as soon or as late as you want. I’m in this with you all the way,” her thumb stroked over Vanessa’s wedding band. “That’s what I promised you. That’s the promise I make to you every day as your wife.”

Vanessa blinked and looked down. “Shit, you gonna make me cry,” she mumbled, giving Brooke’s hand a light squeeze to reassure her she was okay. “Guess we gotta think about redecorating the guest room then, huh?”

“You know my weakness for interior design,” she cooed, pressing a kiss to the back of Vanessa’s hand.

—

By the time Monday rolled around, Jackie had talked herself out of most of her anxiety. When the time was right, she thought, she could talk things out with Jan. But until then, she had a job to do, a job that she did like.

Jackie’s main task was to write a lot of information on the chalkboard. It was perfect as far as she was concerned – having her back to the class meant she didn’t have to worry about making awkward eye contact with Jan. She had to admit, it was kind of a genius move on Brooke’s part.

Jan, however, was left with a predicament of her own. She and Gigi had sat in the front because even with contacts or glasses, they were both nearsighted as all hell. However, this put Jackie right in her line of sight, and she immediately began regretting her decision.

While the dress Jackie wore came down to her knees, the fabric clung to her body in a way that accentuated some of her best physical features.

And Jan hadn’t meant to stare – staring was rude and her mother taught her better. But she would be damned if Jackie’s ass wasn’t hypnotizing her. She couldn’t help but wonder how she hadn’t noticed before.

“You’re gonna snap your pen in half with the way you’re biting it,” Gigi poked Jan’s shoulder, snapping her friend out of her trance. “Also, some subtlety really wouldn’t hurt you right now.”

Jan blushed, looking down at her notes, which were nowhere near as detailed as usual. “Don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Gigi chuckled. “Please, your eyes were about to burn a hole into her butt.”

“They were not, I was just reading the board,” she insisted, but now that she had to actively avoid staring, her body seemed all the more compelled to continue. She squeezed her eyes shut for a moment, trying to get her mind and body on the same page.

“Hey, you have good taste, I’m just saying be less obvious about it.”

Jan just buried her face in her notes, hoping that if she focused on getting work done, her mind would stop conjuring images of Jackie in various states of undress.

“...And that’ll just about do it,” Brooke Lynn was saying. “You guys are free to go, see you Wednesday.” She closed her book, punctuating the dismissal. Her eyes followed the students out of the room, waiting until they were alone before speaking to Jackie. “How are you feeling?”

Jackie exhaled deeply, dropping herself down onto the desk closest to Brooke’s as if she were dead weight. “I feel okay. I think not having to look at her made it easy. Have you seen her eyes? They’re so warm and brown and–”

“–And couldn’t stay off of you,” Brooke finished with a smirk. “Jackie, she is hot for you, you should’ve seen how she was staring at you. I already knew you have a great ass, but damn, it had a magnetic pull on that poor girl.”

Jackie turned a shade of red deeper and brighter than it had ever been. She suddenly became hyper-aware of her body, not necessarily in a self-conscious way – in fact, part of her was flattered – but it was overwhelming to process at first. “I guess she might not regret the other night that much then,” she managed with a strangled laugh.

“Honey, it’s pretty clear she wants a repeat performance. I wasn’t even paying all that much attention to her, but I swear I almost offered her a towel,” she chuckled.

Even though Jan was long gone, Jackie looked out of the classroom and into the hall, as if she could still catch sight of her. “I never thought I’d be relieved to be objectified,” she mused.

Brooke let out a light laugh at that. “So you’ll go talk to her?”

She shook her head as her gaze drifted back to the desk. “Not yet. Soon… Hopefully soon. I think I’ll know when I’m ready.”

—

“Well, other than you ogling the TA you fooled around with, I think today went well,” Gigi said as they walked back to the residence hall. “You ready for your audition later?”

“I wasn’t ogling her.” Jan chewed on her lip. “Don’t laugh, but…” She shifted awkwardly as she looked anywhere but directly at her friend. “I’m worried I might be too… distracted to nail it.”

Gigi looked at her friend with an arched brow. “First of all, yes you were. We established this. Second, you think you’ll be too horny to focus on singing?” She really did try her best not to laugh, but a small giggle slipped through. “Babe, just masturbate like a normal person before you go.”

She huffed. “Don’t you think I’ve thought of that? Lem’s probably gonna be in there, what am I supposed to do, tell her to leave so I can jerk off? We’re close, Geege, but I think there’s a line.”

“Then go in the shower. Jesus, do I have to spell it out for you?” Gigi rolled her eyes.

“You don’t think it’s weird to get off thinking about someone you’re not dating?” Jan asked quietly.

Her friend pinched the bridge of her nose. “At this point I just think you need to do it so you stop sounding so neurotic and paranoid. Hell, if I wasn’t in a committed relationship, I’d offer to help you out myself.”

Jan cocked her head to the side. “Thanks, I think.”

When Jan did get back to the dorm, she saw Lemon on her bed with her AirPods in, just as she’d anticipated. She waved at her to get her attention, waiting for her to take one of them out. “Hey sweetie, I’m just gonna shower before my audition. You know, get nice and calm,” she told her.

Lemon smiled and nodded. “Oh shit, I forgot that was today. Break a leg! But like, not in the shower. That would be bad.”

Jan chuckled as she grabbed what she needed to bring into the bathroom. “I don’t know where I’d be without your wisdom, doll,” she winked playfully before leaving.

The first thing Jan did once she got in the shower was put music on – this wasn’t her first rodeo, so to speak. Even with earbuds in, she knew she ran the risk of Lemon hearing her moan if she didn’t drown it out. With the music playing and water running, Jan undressed and stepped into the shower, letting out a sigh of relief the second the hot water hit her body.

After she washed her hair, Jan leaned against the shower wall, resting her head against the cool tile. She let her hand travel down her body. There was a moment of hesitation when her fingers grazed over her pussy, but after a deep breath, she began rubbing her clit with two fingers. Her eyes fluttered shut as soft, breathy moans slipped out.

“Fuck…” Jan wasn’t thinking about anything at first, but without even trying, her thoughts drifted to Jackie, to what happened the other night, to that day in class. And once she got started, there was no chance of stopping. “Oh, Jackie…” she moaned, rocking against her fingers. Her free hand went to her breast, groping it, and tweaking her nipple.

By the time her orgasm hit, Jan needed to rest her entire weight against the wall to keep herself up. Her legs were shaking and she was whimpering, taking deep breaths as she finally felt sturdy enough to stand back upright. After that, she just did a quick wash off her face and body before getting out and drying off, going back into the bedroom wrapped up in her robe shortly after.

“Hey, feeling any better?” Lemon asked casually. It was clear she hadn’t moved an inch this whole time, nor was she aware of what Jan had gotten up to.

“Much better, actually,” Jan nodded, taking the towel wrap off of her head and combing her hair out. “What’s your plan for the rest of the day?” she asked as she continued getting ready.

Lemon paused her music and took out her earbuds, she had been waiting for an opportunity to talk about herself. “Actually, I’m meeting up with a girl later.” She didn’t wait for Jan to ask before she continued. “Okay, so, like, I had just lit a joint and I see this really pretty girl – tall, you know how I like ‘em – and she seems hella stressed, so I offer her a hit. So, we’re smoking and chatting and long story short, we have a date tonight.”

“That was the short version?” Jan teased as she got dressed. “I’m guessing it'll be more of the same?”

She scoffed. “No… We’ll probably fuck too.”

Jan laughed softly as she straightened her hair, then pulled it up into a high ponytail. “Well, it’s always nice to have an itinerary,” she hummed. “I’ll see you later.”

—

“Next!”

Jan stepped onto the stage and held herself with confidence. She introduced herself, handed the sheet music to the pianist, and then she simply did what she did best; she sang. She gave it her all, emoting all the right words, belting all the right notes. There was a lingering rush of adrenaline when she finished. “Thank you,” she smiled politely and made her way off stage.

“Great job up there,” a distinct voice out of seemingly nowhere caused Jan to jump, startled.

“Oh, thanks Vanjie,” Jan smiled, running her fingers through her ponytail. “I didn’t realize anyone other than the directors were watching.”

Vanessa shrugged. “People gave up tryna tell me what to do a long time ago. Except for Brooke, but there’s always an exception for the wife. But anyway… you feelin’ okay? I don’t know all the details, but I know you had a rough weekend.”

Of course, Jan figured Vanessa knew more than she let on – she could safely assume Jackie told Brooke, and Brooke told Vanessa. But she hoped some details had gotten lost in translation. “Oh, yeah, I guess,” she bounced awkwardly on the balls of her feet. “Things are a little weird, I’m sure it’ll be fine.”

“Listen, I’ve been in your shoes. The worst thing you can do is overthink it. Brooke did it, Jackie does it, and I get the vibe you do too. Not everything’s as deep as y’all make it out to be, you know?”

Jan chewed her lip and nodded. Sure, she knew Vanessa was right, but it was easier said than done. It wasn’t something she could simply stop doing, something she could just turn on and off at will. “The situation’s just… It’s complicated. But I get what you’re saying, I do,” she assured. “All I wanna focus on now is being able to sleep tonight so I can be ready to see if I got a callback tomorrow.”

Vanessa gave Jan’s arm a gentle, reassuring squeeze. “You got this. Ain’t no one around you doubting that.”

And Jan tried her best to take that to heart, she tried to stay positive the rest of the night, to turn her brain off when it was finally time to sleep. She was pretty sure she passed out at nearly three in the morning, but as soon as her alarm went off, she shot right out of bed.

Lemon rolled onto her side, watching Jan scramble to get ready with energy from god knows where. “How the fuck do you do that?” she mumbled groggily.

Jan shrugged as she brushed her hair. “It’s a blessing and a curse, Lem.” She checked her phone. “The callback list should be up by the time I get there,” she murmured, offering a quick goodbye to her roommate before she was out the door.

By the time she got to the auditorium, there was already a small group of hopeful actors forming outside the doors. And as soon as the list went up, they all crowded around it.

Too impatient to wait, Jan made her way to the front, offering haphazard apologies to everyone she bumped out of the way. It was worth it for the happiness and relief she felt when she saw that she was on the callback list for Veronica.

The first thing she did was call Gigi and did her best to not scream into the phone. “I got a callback! And there were only two other girls listed for Veronica, Geege, I’m this close to getting it. I can taste it.”

“That’s my girl, I knew you’d crush it,” Gigi replied. “You’re gonna nail the callback too, and don’t be afraid to take my advice again if you need it.”

Jan furrowed her brows. “How did you know I followed your advice?”

Gigi had a smug grin that Jan swore she could feel through the phone. “I didn’t.”

[artificialqueens]

Hold Me Tighter (Even Closer), Chapter 3 (Branjie, Jankie) - Joley

ao3 link

Tumblr link

Brooke Lynn furrowed her brows and strummed her fingers against the table. “So, let me see if I’ve got this right – you invited Jan over to practice for her audition, got wine drunk, then dry-humped until she got off?”

Jackie nodded in confirmation, her eyes fixated more on her coffee cup than Brooke – she had to build back up to being able to make eye-contact. “Then in the morning she was gone and she left me a note,” she finished, holding the piece of paper up. “I really fucked up, didn’t I?”

“It wasn’t your smartest move,” she told her, trying not to laugh at the sheer absurdity of it all. “But if she just left like that, she’s probably just as scared as you are. Listen, the first day I met Vanessa was a mess. I walked her home from work that night, kissed her, and then literally ran away. She still makes fun of me for it.”

The story made Jackie laugh, but it caught her by surprise as well. She had always seen Brooke as someone so unshakably confident. “I guess if things worked out for you guys, all hope isn’t totally lost…” She took another sip from her drink and sighed. “I still don’t know how I’m going to face her in class on Monday,” she admitted.

Brooke reached across the table and put a reassuring hand on her shoulder. “Just focus on your work. I promise I’ll find something to keep you busy, okay?” As much as she wanted to continue her matchmaking game, she could see that the tension needed to diffuse before she tried to push them closer. Just because Katya lucked out didn’t mean lightning would strike twice.

Jackie’s entire body relaxed in relief. She was still anxious about seeing Jan again, but it meant a lot to know that Brooke was looking out for her. “Okay. Yes, thank you. I can work with that.” She nodded, then checked her phone. “I have to get going, though. I’ll talk to you later,” she said as she gathered her things, including the note that she tucked into her pocket.

Brooke smiled and waved her off. She stayed put, though. She was expecting Vanessa any minute now. They liked meeting here when they could, after all, it was the café A’keria recently became the owner of, the same one she’d started working in after the Starbucks fiasco all those years ago. It was sentimental to them now.

“Hey boo,” Vanessa greeted as she walked in, leaning over and giving her wife a kiss before sitting down. “Must’ve just missed Jackie, how’s she doing?”

“The poor girl is going through it,” Brooke shook her head sympathetically. “She and Jan got drunk and fooled around, and Jan left before she woke up. She left a Post-It or something.”

Vanessa frowned and shook her head. “Mh-mm, I hate Post-Its. If you’re gonna dip, send a text like a normal person,” she mused.

“Maybe she thought a handwritten note would be more meaningful,” she reasoned. “Regardless, she’s just gonna need some time to recover before we continue with any matchmaking shenanigans.”

Vanessa gave a firm nod of agreement. “Understood.” She sat quietly for a moment, strumming her fingernails against the table. “I wanna talk about the baby thing.”

Brooke blinked in surprise at the abrupt subject change but leaned in to listen attentively nonetheless. “Of course, what’s on your mind?”

“Listen… I know we got good genes and all, but I don’t wanna create a baby in a lab when there are so many kids that need a family. I had friends in foster care when I was little, you know? That shit must’ve really sucked for them. And I just think… You and me are in a position to really help a kid out,” she told her, then held her breath as she waited for her wife’s response.

Brooke reached across the table and held Vanessa’s hands. “Baby girl, if that’s what you want, I am a hundred percent on board. I think that’s a wonderful motivation to adopt. We can start looking at agencies as soon or as late as you want. I’m in this with you all the way,” her thumb stroked over Vanessa’s wedding band. “That’s what I promised you. That’s the promise I make to you every day as your wife.”

Vanessa blinked and looked down. “Shit, you gonna make me cry,” she mumbled, giving Brooke’s hand a light squeeze to reassure her she was okay. “Guess we gotta think about redecorating the guest room then, huh?”

“You know my weakness for interior design,” she cooed, pressing a kiss to the back of Vanessa’s hand.

—

By the time Monday rolled around, Jackie had talked herself out of most of her anxiety. When the time was right, she thought, she could talk things out with Jan. But until then, she had a job to do, a job that she did like.

Jackie’s main task was to write a lot of information on the chalkboard. It was perfect as far as she was concerned – having her back to the class meant she didn’t have to worry about making awkward eye contact with Jan. She had to admit, it was kind of a genius move on Brooke’s part.

Jan, however, was left with a predicament of her own. She and Gigi had sat in the front because even with contacts or glasses, they were both nearsighted as all hell. However, this put Jackie right in her line of sight, and she immediately began regretting her decision.

While the dress Jackie wore came down to her knees, the fabric clung to her body in a way that accentuated some of her best physical features.

And Jan hadn’t meant to stare – staring was rude and her mother taught her better. But she would be damned if Jackie’s ass wasn’t hypnotizing her. She couldn’t help but wonder how she hadn’t noticed before.

“You’re gonna snap your pen in half with the way you’re biting it,” Gigi poked Jan’s shoulder, snapping her friend out of her trance. “Also, some subtlety really wouldn’t hurt you right now.”

Jan blushed, looking down at her notes, which were nowhere near as detailed as usual. “Don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Gigi chuckled. “Please, your eyes were about to burn a hole into her butt.”

“They were not, I was just reading the board,” she insisted, but now that she had to actively avoid staring, her body seemed all the more compelled to continue. She squeezed her eyes shut for a moment, trying to get her mind and body on the same page.

“Hey, you have good taste, I’m just saying be less obvious about it.”

Jan just buried her face in her notes, hoping that if she focused on getting work done, her mind would stop conjuring images of Jackie in various states of undress.

“…And that’ll just about do it,” Brooke Lynn was saying. “You guys are free to go, see you Wednesday.” She closed her book, punctuating the dismissal. Her eyes followed the students out of the room, waiting until they were alone before speaking to Jackie. “How are you feeling?”

Jackie exhaled deeply, dropping herself down onto the desk closest to Brooke’s as if she were dead weight. “I feel okay. I think not having to look at her made it easy. Have you seen her eyes? They’re so warm and brown and–”

“–And couldn’t stay off of you,” Brooke finished with a smirk. “Jackie, she is hot for you, you should’ve seen how she was staring at you. I already knew you have a great ass, but damn, it had a magnetic pull on that poor girl.”

Jackie turned a shade of red deeper and brighter than it had ever been. She suddenly became hyper-aware of her body, not necessarily in a self-conscious way – in fact, part of her was flattered – but it was overwhelming to process at first. “I guess she might not regret the other night that much then,” she managed with a strangled laugh.

“Honey, it’s pretty clear she wants a repeat performance. I wasn’t even paying all that much attention to her, but I swear I almost offered her a towel,” she chuckled.

Even though Jan was long gone, Jackie looked out of the classroom and into the hall, as if she could still catch sight of her. “I never thought I’d be relieved to be objectified,” she mused.

Brooke let out a light laugh at that. “So you’ll go talk to her?”

She shook her head as her gaze drifted back to the desk. “Not yet. Soon… Hopefully soon. I think I’ll know when I’m ready.”

—

“Well, other than you ogling the TA you fooled around with, I think today went well,” Gigi said as they walked back to the residence hall. “You ready for your audition later?”

“I wasn’t ogling her.” Jan chewed on her lip. “Don’t laugh, but…” She shifted awkwardly as she looked anywhere but directly at her friend. “I’m worried I might be too… distracted to nail it.”

Gigi looked at her friend with an arched brow. “First of all, yes you were. We established this. Second, you think you’ll be too horny to focus on singing?” She really did try her best not to laugh, but a small giggle slipped through. “Babe, just masturbate like a normal person before you go.”

She huffed. “Don’t you think I’ve thought of that? Lem’s probably gonna be in there, what am I supposed to do, tell her to leave so I can jerk off? We’re close, Geege, but I think there’s a line.”

“Then go in the shower. Jesus, do I have to spell it out for you?” Gigi rolled her eyes.

“You don’t think it’s weird to get off thinking about someone you’re not dating?” Jan asked quietly.

Her friend pinched the bridge of her nose. “At this point I just think you need to do it so you stop sounding so neurotic and paranoid. Hell, if I wasn’t in a committed relationship, I’d offer to help you out myself.”

Jan cocked her head to the side. “Thanks, I think.”

When Jan did get back to the dorm, she saw Lemon on her bed with her AirPods in, just as she’d anticipated. She waved at her to get her attention, waiting for her to take one of them out. “Hey sweetie, I’m just gonna shower before my audition. You know, get nice and calm,” she told her.

Lemon smiled and nodded. “Oh shit, I forgot that was today. Break a leg! But like, not in the shower. That would be bad.”

Jan chuckled as she grabbed what she needed to bring into the bathroom. “I don’t know where I’d be without your wisdom, doll,” she winked playfully before leaving.

The first thing Jan did once she got in the shower was put music on – this wasn’t her first rodeo, so to speak. Even with earbuds in, she knew she ran the risk of Lemon hearing her moan if she didn’t drown it out. With the music playing and water running, Jan undressed and stepped into the shower, letting out a sigh of relief the second the hot water hit her body.

After she washed her hair, Jan leaned against the shower wall, resting her head against the cool tile. She let her hand travel down her body. There was a moment of hesitation when her fingers grazed over her pussy, but after a deep breath, she began rubbing her clit with two fingers. Her eyes fluttered shut as soft, breathy moans slipped out.

“Fuck…” Jan wasn’t thinking about anything at first, but without even trying, her thoughts drifted to Jackie, to what happened the other night, to that day in class. And once she got started, there was no chance of stopping. “Oh, Jackie…” she moaned, rocking against her fingers. Her free hand went to her breast, groping it, and tweaking her nipple.

By the time her orgasm hit, Jan needed to rest her entire weight against the wall to keep herself up. Her legs were shaking and she was whimpering, taking deep breaths as she finally felt sturdy enough to stand back upright. After that, she just did a quick wash off her face and body before getting out and drying off, going back into the bedroom wrapped up in her robe shortly after.

“Hey, feeling any better?” Lemon asked casually. It was clear she hadn’t moved an inch this whole time, nor was she aware of what Jan had gotten up to.

“Much better, actually,” Jan nodded, taking the towel wrap off of her head and combing her hair out. “What’s your plan for the rest of the day?” she asked as she continued getting ready.

Lemon paused her music and took out her earbuds, she had been waiting for an opportunity to talk about herself. “Actually, I’m meeting up with a girl later.” She didn’t wait for Jan to ask before she continued. “Okay, so, like, I had just lit a joint and I see this really pretty girl – tall, you know how I like ‘em – and she seems hella stressed, so I offer her a hit. So, we’re smoking and chatting and long story short, we have a date tonight.”

“That was the short version?” Jan teased as she got dressed. “I’m guessing it’ll be more of the same?”

She scoffed. “No… We’ll probably fuck too.”

Jan laughed softly as she straightened her hair, then pulled it up into a high ponytail. “Well, it’s always nice to have an itinerary,” she hummed. “I’ll see you later.”

—

“Next!”

Jan stepped onto the stage and held herself with confidence. She introduced herself, handed the sheet music to the pianist, and then she simply did what she did best; she sang. She gave it her all, emoting all the right words, belting all the right notes. There was a lingering rush of adrenaline when she finished. “Thank you,” she smiled politely and made her way off stage.

“Great job up there,” a distinct voice out of seemingly nowhere caused Jan to jump, startled.

“Oh, thanks Vanjie,” Jan smiled, running her fingers through her ponytail. “I didn’t realize anyone other than the directors were watching.”

Vanessa shrugged. “People gave up tryna tell me what to do a long time ago. Except for Brooke, but there’s always an exception for the wife. But anyway… you feelin’ okay? I don’t know all the details, but I know you had a rough weekend.”

Of course, Jan figured Vanessa knew more than she let on – she could safely assume Jackie told Brooke, and Brooke told Vanessa. But she hoped some details had gotten lost in translation. “Oh, yeah, I guess,” she bounced awkwardly on the balls of her feet. “Things are a little weird, I’m sure it’ll be fine.”

“Listen, I’ve been in your shoes. The worst thing you can do is overthink it. Brooke did it, Jackie does it, and I get the vibe you do too. Not everything’s as deep as y’all make it out to be, you know?”

Jan chewed her lip and nodded. Sure, she knew Vanessa was right, but it was easier said than done. It wasn’t something she could simply stop doing, something she could just turn on and off at will. “The situation’s just… It’s complicated. But I get what you’re saying, I do,” she assured. “All I wanna focus on now is being able to sleep tonight so I can be ready to see if I got a callback tomorrow.”

Vanessa gave Jan’s arm a gentle, reassuring squeeze. “You got this. Ain’t no one around you doubting that.”

And Jan tried her best to take that to heart, she tried to stay positive the rest of the night, to turn her brain off when it was finally time to sleep. She was pretty sure she passed out at nearly three in the morning, but as soon as her alarm went off, she shot right out of bed.

Lemon rolled onto her side, watching Jan scramble to get ready with energy from god knows where. “How the fuck do you do that?” she mumbled groggily.

Jan shrugged as she brushed her hair. “It’s a blessing and a curse, Lem.” She checked her phone. “The callback list should be up by the time I get there,” she murmured, offering a quick goodbye to her roommate before she was out the door.

By the time she got to the auditorium, there was already a small group of hopeful actors forming outside the doors. And as soon as the list went up, they all crowded around it.

Too impatient to wait, Jan made her way to the front, offering haphazard apologies to everyone she bumped out of the way. It was worth it for the happiness and relief she felt when she saw that she was on the callback list for Veronica.

The first thing she did was call Gigi and did her best to not scream into the phone. “I got a callback! And there were only two other girls listed for Veronica, Geege, I’m this close to getting it. I can taste it.”

“That’s my girl, I knew you’d crush it,” Gigi replied. “You’re gonna nail the callback too, and don’t be afraid to take my advice again if you need it.”

Jan furrowed her brows. “How did you know I followed your advice?”

Gigi had a smug grin that Jan swore she could feel through the phone. “I didn’t.”

[crusherthedoctor]

It goes without saying: the first level always matters. If it doesn’t leave a good impression, it would hardly motivate you to give the rest of the journey a chance, would it? Being in fanfic form aside, Beyond the Stars is no exception, and because of this, Gleaming Meadows was actually one of the longest zones to work out. Viridonia is meant to stand out from previous Sonic settings after all, and kicking things off with a poor man’s Green Hill wouldn’t cut it.

Since the first level in a Sonic game usually tends to be either a hilly area (Green Hill, Emerald Hill, Seaside Hill) or an urban area (City Escape, Westopolis, Windmill Isle to an extent), I decided a good way to set this zone apart would be to... combine the two! This was inspired very much by Neo Green Hill from Sonic Advance, since although that zone wasn’t a city, it did add some minor urban elements the further it went on, most notably the bridge at the end where you fight Eggman. So as tribute to a forever underrated installment, Gleaming Meadows does that too, but in a different way.

Creating Zone 1: Gleaming Meadows

1-1: Blossom Fields

What’s a good way to make your first level stand out from all the Green Hills? Give it more than green, obviously. While it’s important that the entire adventure is full of interesting locations, I really wanted the first level to sound as gorgeous as possible in order to leave a strong first impression for this new journey, so what better inspiration than tulip fields, particularly those of the Netherlands?

The added use of yellows, oranges, reds and pinks already help set it apart, but there’s also the fact that although there are some lakes and rivers here and there, it’s not particularly coastal.

This aesthetic not only serves to get things off to a good start, but it also sums up the running theme with Beyond the Stars in general. Namely, that although plenty of the basic level tropes will be familiar to us all, many of them will be handled in rather different ways, thus proving that as long as you can think outside the box, there’s plenty of life in them yet. Some examples are more extreme than others, but other times, even a simple change of colour, weather, or time of day can make all the difference.

I mentioned in Chapter 1 proper that the cliffs in Blossom Fields have unique markings that convey a vague, lore-hinting narrative. I couldn’t find a better image to explain how this would look, so I’ll have to resort to this shot from Paper Mario:

See the cliff behind them, with its starry patterns on the soil? That’s basically the gist, but with a more complex pattern.

Also mentioned was the addition of a tunnel near the end of the stage, which is one example of the Neo Green Hill-esque hillside with minor urban elements that I intended.

Don’t assume the inside is drab however. On the contrary, it comes with abstract graffiti in a style reminiscent of the Colinton Tunnel in Edinburgh:

Very Jet Set Radio, eh? In addition to simply being more interesting this way, I figured it fit Sonic perfectly.

But you might question what a tunnel inspired by Edinburgh is doing in a level inspired by the Netherlands. Well, this is another running gag with Viridonia. While not always the case, a lot of times there’ll be combined aspects of real world inspiration, as opposed to Unleashed and its clear cut Not-Greece, Not-New York, etc. This is not just me throwing things at the wall to see what sticks, there is in fact a purpose to it, as it’s one of the more subtle ways of showing how peculiar Viridonia can be compared to other places in Sonic history - partly due to the Ethereal Zone - with only the Little Planet truly competing with the island in that field.

And y’know, it gives it that extra bit of identity and variety, eh?

Now, with music choices to explain what sort of musical atmosphere I’d have in mind for each level, I’m gonna have to use basic links from now on, since I rediscovered the hard way that Tumblr only allows up to five or so direct posts. It’s also worth noting that if this were a real game, it would do what SA1 (and, uh, ‘06) did before it, with each level having at least two different bits of music for the appropriate sections to add even more flair. I’ll still be listing two examples each for extra comparison’s sake, so with that said...

First Section (the fields): Opening Demo (Sonic Mega Collection) Ending B (Sonic Advance 3)

Second Section (the tunnel): Topical Tropical (Sonic: Before the Sequel) Shooting Ristar

1-2: Swanky Suburbs

Continuing the Netherland theme going on, the local town has a touch of Giethoorn to it, with its calming rivers and little pathways. Though unlike Giethoorn, there would be some cars and short roads sprinkled about.

Again, really wanted to convey that feeling of low-key beauty and coziness, and provide more justification for why Sonic and Co would come here for a vacation. But that’s not all: when it comes to the houses and other buildings, the red and white colour scheme is more based on those of Portugal:

And of course, you have the local parks as well. You can even interact with the slides and swings if you want, because you’re never too old to make the kids wait their turn.

First Section (calm): Neo Green Hill Classic The Amazon (DuckTales Remastered)

Second Section (when Badniks start wrecking things up): Wave Ocean ~The Inlet~ (Sonic ‘06) Andy’s Neighborhood (Toy Story 2)

1-3: Yellow Hills

As we go on, we leave the Netherland influence behind, and with the countryside in sight, the clue is in the name. Lots of yellow to be had indeed.

And inbetween all these fields, we have some villages, of which the rural vibe suits the place just fine.

Then as we go into farmyard territory, the yellow actually starts taking a back seat in favor of red, because I guess even I’m not immune to the subverting expectations fever. Hopefully I’ve done it in a way that isn’t asinine though.

The barnyards would be the stereotypical red and white, since it works well enough with the autumn colours, and can still pop out despite there being so much red surrounding them.

And yes, there are many farm animals hanging around here.

Yes, that includes horses.

No, they’re not Trudy’s family.

First Section (yellow): Tornado Alley (Crash Bandicoot: The Wrath of Cortex) Mount Lineland (Super Paper Mario)

Second Section (red): Green Hill ‘12 (Tee Lopes) Menu (Mario Tennis)

1-4: Rusty Mill

A wooden mill doesn’t leave a lot to the imagination, so it would look pretty much exactly as you’d expect, albeit a tad more old and worn.

The same goes for inside, really. Since the interior of mills are tricky to find interesting images of when elaborating on your quirky Sonic the Hedgehog zone, I’ll be using another game for comparison instead, specifically Donkey Kong Country 3:

Except multiply the cobwebs by five.

It’s decayed, and a bit grim, but not enough to the point where it would feel like it’s near the endgame. Yet another thing I go in hard on in this story: escalation. In order for later zones and climactic moments to be more striking and impactful, you gotta start off by taking it easy. There’s still action to be had, and there’s still mysterious and/or ominous touches here and there, but it’s for the purpose of organically building things up, so that when things do escalate, you actually feel it when shit starts going down. Pacing, boys and girls! Learn it!

Then again, as with Angel Island in S3&K, this place gets set on fire halfway through, so maybe I need to remember my own lessons. But on the other hand, also like S3&K, it still pales in comparison to what happens later, so...

Lastly for today, when you’re fighting the fearsome Paindozer, the section of the mill that you confront it in suspiciously takes a form more akin to a old fashioned warehouse. Like... IKEA, I guess. But on fire.

So congratulations, you got through IKEA Zone. Looks like Eggman should have stuck with B&Q Zone instead.

First Section (calm): Pogo Painter (Crash Bash) The Walk of Life (Rayman 2)

Second Section (on fire): Vs. Rotatatron & Refreshinator (Sonic Colours) Set Point - Match Point (Mario Tennis)

[saiilorstars]

Falling in Temptation

Previous chapters  || Sequel to Stars Dance 

Fandom: Doctor Who

Pairing: 11th Doctor/ Female OC

~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~

Ch. 2: The Order of the Silence

Chapter summary: Three months have passed and the group learns that the Silence have been long-time residents of planet Earth. The Silence, in turn, seem to know Avalon and Amy more than the either girl would like. In the end when the Doctor has found a way to rid Earth of the Silence, he has a little talk with River Song concerning the warning he received a while back about Avalon. Would River actually hurt Avalon?

Fairy Tale Memoirs (Companion story)

3 Months Later.

Avalon, Amy, and Canton sat inside a car parked outside an orphanage underneath a heavy rainstorm. Canton reached to turn off the radio and looked back at the two women, both dressed in black suits to pose as FBI Agents, Amy in the passenger seat and Avalon behind, "Ready, check?"

Avalon raised her palm and stared at it hard, rubbing a finger over it, "All clear..." she answered emotionless, "...and more than ready," she made sure to add.

Three months. Three months it had been since the last time they faced the little girl in the astronaut suit and because of its 'guardians' (the creatures who had the power to erase memories) they had to be on the run for that much time. Of course, it had been part of the plan between everyone. While all the companions were out in various states of America, gathering information of the creatures after the little girl, the Doctor would be 'locked up' in Area 51 with Canton looking over him and 'chasing' after the other companions. During that time Avalon had come across many, many of the creatures...who all knew her, apparently. The small moments she could retain a conversation with them she'd demand to know how and why they knew her. Over and over she kept getting the response of their knowledge of her friends. That alone was a powerful motive for her to have a creature face to face and demand what they wanted. That was why she was there, standing in front of the orphanage with Amy and Canton, she needed answers and she was going to get them.

The Doctor had, had a plan to end the creatures' reign over the Earth, because that was what they were...they weren't just a simple tribe going for world domination, they had already won. They were the reigning species of the planet and it was time for the humans to finally remember and throw them off their planet. While he went to begin the plan, on the rocket-ship that would land on the Moon in just a couple hours, Avalon, Amy and Canton were to try and find the girl's 'home' and hopefully the girl herself. Meanwhile, Lena, River and Rory would remain in the TARDIS overlooking both parties should either get into trouble. Everyone in the group had nanorecorders inserted into their hands so communication would be easier, as well as a tool against the creatures who could evade their minds as soon as they looked away.

Avalon knocked on the front doors of the orphanage, impatiently groaning when she had to knock for the third time. Finally, a man, Dr. Renfrew opened the door but only slightly, "Hello," he greeted.

Canton held up his ID, "FBI. You must be Dr Renfrew. Can we come in?"

"The children are asleep," Renfrew seemed to be making an excuse.

"We'll be very quiet," Amy assured.

"Is there a problem?"

"It's about a missing child," Avalon noticed how nervous and simply...not quite there, type of stance the man had.

"What are you...? Yes, yes, come in, please."

Avalon pushed the door open and walked inside first, Renfrew quickly taking the lead. The trio observed the inside of the orphanage with distaste the further they walked inside. The entire building seemed on the brink of falling to the ground. What drew their attention most was the big, bright, red letters written on the walls 'GET OUT' and 'LEAVE NOW'. That didn't seem very welcoming for the children nor the adoptive parents.

"This way," Renfrew led them for the stairs, "Please excuse the writing. It keeps happening. I try to clean it up."

"Are the kids in some sort of arts and craft phase?" Avalon looked at the wall with the writing as they passed by, "They're the ones doing this, yes?"

"Yes. The children. It must be, yes."

"That doesn't sound very sure," Avalon whispered back to Amy who nodded in agreement.

"Anyway, my office is this way," Renfrew continued leading them up the stairs.

"We nearly didn't come to this place. I understood Graystark Hall was closed in '67," Canton was noticing the writing on Renfrew's wrist matching the same words on the wall.

"That's the plan, yes," Renfrew mumbled.

"The plan?" Amy caught the word with suspicion.

"Not long now."

"You do realize it's the year 1969, right?" Avalon raised an eyebrow, watching Renfrew freeze and look back.

"No, no. We close in '67. That's the plan, yes."

"I just said it's 1969 now!"

"Why are you saying that? Of course, it isn't."

"July," Avalon added, more than irritated she was being blatantly ignored.

"My office is this way, this way," Renfrew went off to a small stairway.

"We'll check upstairs," Amy whispered to Canton.

"Be careful," Canton nodded to the two gingers as they continued up the remaining steps.

~ 0 ~

Avalon pushed open a door in the upstairs hallway, leading Amy inside a disused dorm room with many bed frames on either side. Across from them were big, red words 'LEAVE ME ALONE' just like the stairway wall had.

"Well, then," Avalon breathed and walked further inside with her flashlight, "I think we came to the right place," she looked back at Amy who was already taking out her phone.

Amy nodded and spoke into her phone as soon as the line had been opened, "I think we've found the place she was taken from," she spoke to the Doctor.

"How do you know?" the Doctor was quick to ask.

"Cos those things have been here. But the whole place is deserted."

"There's just one guy here and we think he's lost it."

"We don't 'think' we know," Avalon made sure to clarify loud enough for the Doctor to hear.

"Repeated memory wipes fry your head eventually. Find out what you can, but don't hang around."

"Where are you?" Amy dared to ask, even Avalon dreading the answer.

"Gotta go!" the Doctor hurriedly said, "Got company!"

"...who are probably dressed in blue with guns," Avalon shook her head, "Idiot."

Amy laughed lightly, "Probably," she moved up to where Avalon stood in front of the words on the walls.

Soon after, the door slammed shut, making both turn to see what had caused it. They ran for the door to open it but Avalon had stopped in the center of the room, looking at her hands that now bore the tally-marks on the backs of it, signifying they'd seen the creatures again, "Amy!" she called, the other ginger turning and saw Avalon's hands, "...look at your hand, Amy," Avalon swallowed as Amy's palm flashed red, the nanorecorder having been used.

Amy pressed her palm and listened to her voice on the recorder, "I can see them, but I think they're asleep. Get out! Just get out!"

Avalon turned around for the window, gasping deeply when she saw her reflection on the window where her face was covered in tally marks, "There's a swarm, there has to be," she stumbled back, bumping into Amy.

Both women happened to look up to see exactly what Avalon had assumed, a swarm of the creatures up in the ceiling like bats as they hung upside-down. Amy accidentally knocked a pail as she tried moving backwards for the door, waking one of the creatures. Avalon raised her hand to leave herself a message when the door opened up on its own and unfortunately made both women look away from the creatures and forget all about them. As they left the room, the creature they'd woken up had stood in the middle of the room and watched them leave.

"Let's try this room," Avalon stopped by a second door and was about to open it when Amy spoke to thin air.

"Hello, who are you?"

Avalon turned and looked around, seeing nothing but walls and doors, "Amy? Who are you talking to?"

Amy went over to a new room where she'd literally just seen a woman with an eyepatch on it, like a hatch. Avalon sighed and followed Amy to the room she'd chosen, "Amy?"

Amy opened the door that led into a nursery, "Hello? I saw you, looking through the hatch..."

"Amy, there's no hatch here," Avalon stood at the door that was completely solid.

Amy frowned of confusion, she knew what she saw. Avalon left the doorway and came inside the room, "This place was just used," she remarked as she went over to the bed and picked up one of the stuffed animals, "They're in good condition and not dirty, look?"

Amy agreed and moved over to a bureau filled with different portraits of the little girl at various ages. However, she picked a certain portrait up and stared at it in disbelief, "How? How can that be me?"

"What is it?" Avalon set the stuffed animal down and headed for her but stopped at the sound of footsteps.

Upon both turning, they found the astronaut entering the room, "Who are you?" Amy immediately called, "We don't understand, so just tell me who you are!" the astronaut lifted its visor and revealed the little girl inside, the side of the inner visor cracked from the bullet Amy had fired at her, "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to shoot you. I'm glad I missed."

"But you killed the Doctor, or, you're going to kill him," Avalon sadly said, unable to be furious at a terrified, little girl for something that probably wasn't her fault, "You can't control that thing, can you?" she nodded to the spacesuit, "Cos you said...you said the spaceman was going to eat you..."

Amy realized what Avalon was trying to say and had to agree, "Oh my god..." she covered her mouth, "...the spaceman came and..."

"Please help me," the little girl begged, "Help me, please."

Without a thought, Avalon dashed to help the girl...when two of the creatures entered the room and slammed the door shut and headed for all three.

~ 0 ~

After hearing the screams of Avalon and Amy, and shooting one of the creatures, Canton ran up the stairs and hurried to the door from which Amy's voice was coming from, "Help me! Please, I can't, I can't see! Somebody help me!"

"Amy!" Canton tried breaking down the door, "Avalon! Can you hear me? I'm going to try to blow the lock. I need you to stand back."

Just as Canton raised his gun, the rest of the group had arrived, the Doctor quickly pushing the gun down, "Okay, gun down, I've got it!" Amy, Ava, we're here. Are you OK?" he used the sonic on the door and went inside.

"I can't see!" they heard Amy sobbing.

The Doctor rushed for the spacesuit laying on the floor while the others searched for the missing gingers.

"Where are they, Doctor?" Rory frowned when the room came up empty.

"They're not here," Lena gasped with realization.

"It's empty," River had raised the visor of the spacesuit while the Doctor used the sonic on it.

"It's dark, it's so dark. I don't know where I am," Amy's voice continued to be heard, "I don't think Avalon's here...please, can anybody hear me?"

The Doctor saw two nanorecorders laying on the floor, one still blinking red from where Amy's voice was coming from. Rory saw them as well and picked them up, "They took this out of them? How did they do that, Doctor?" his heart broke as he heard Amy crying through the recorder, still pleading for help, "Why can I still hear her?"

"And how come Avalon's isn't doing anything?" Lena took her sister's recorder and stared at it, hoping to at least get something that would tell her she was okay.

"Is it a recording?" River questioned while the Doctor used the sonic on the recorders.

"It defaults to live. This is current," the Doctor sighed, "Wherever Amy is right now, this is what she's saying."

"And Avalon?" Lena nearly teared up, "Why can't I hear her voice? Where is she?"

"Must be unconscious," the Doctor had to guess.

"Amy, can you hear me? We're coming for you. Wherever you are, we're coming, I swear," Rory had taken to talking to the recorder,t hinkg he'd be heard by Amy.

"She can't hear you. I'm so sorry. It's one way," the Doctor sadly informed him.

"She can always hear me, Doctor," Rory frowned, "Always, wherever she is. She always knows that I am coming for her, do you understand me? Always."

"Doctor, are you out there? Can you hear me?" Amy began questioning through the recorder, "Doctor? Oh, God. Please, please, Doctor, just get me out of this."

"He's coming. I'll bring him, I swear," Rory promised Amy and looked at Lena, putting an arm around her shoulders, "We'll find them," he assured her, the brunette beginning to sniffle the more she stared at Avalon's nanorecorder.

Renfrew appeared at the doorway, "Hello, is someone in there? Who? I think someone has been shot. I think we should help. We... I can't... I can't remember."

~ 0 ~

The Doctor and the others were led back to Renfrew's office where the creature Canton had shot was still on the floor, backing away once the Doctor had went for it, "OK. Who and what are you?" he got straight to the point as there was no time to waste.

"Silence, Doctor," the creature answered with ease, "We are the Silence," the Doctor recalled the previous mentions of that word through his travels, beginning with the day he regenerated, "And silence will fall."

~ 0 ~

Once the empty spacesuit was brought to the abandoned warehouse and set up on the operating table, the Doctor and River began examining it in hopes of gathering something of the Silence to help Avalon and Amy. Meanwhile, Lena and Rory stood to the side, both holding the nanorecorders in their hands.

"It's an exo-skeleton. Basically, life support. There's about 20 different kinds of alien tech in here," River gestured to several of the technology inside the spacesuit.

"Who was she? Why put her in here?" the Doctor still didn't understand what an entire species wanted with a little girl.

"Put this on, you don't even need to eat," River continued, as if to emphasize how powerful the the Silence were, "The suit processes sunlight directly. It's got built in weaponry and a communications system that can hack into anything."

"Including the telephone network?"

"Easily."

"Why phone the President?"

"It defaults to the highest authority it can find. The little girl gets frightened, the most powerful man on Earth gets a phone call," River shrugged, "The night terrors with a hotline to the White House," she saw the Doctor sniffing her invitation envelope, going as far as licking it, "I feel compelled to point out if Avalon were here she would've smacked you for that," the Doctor opened his mouth to argue but considered it and ended up shrugging with agreement, "Either way you won't learn anything from that envelope," River made sure to clarify.

"Purchased on Earth, perfectly ordinary stationery, TARDIS blue," the Doctor reviewed what he'd gotten from the envelope, "Summoned by a stranger who won't even show his face. That's a first for me. How about you?"

"Our lives are back to front. Your future's my past, your firsts are my lasts."

"Not really what I asked," the Doctor frowned.

"Ask something else then."

"What are the Silence doing? Raising a child?"

"Keeping her safe," River judged by the spacesuit's components, "Even giving her independence."

"The only way to save Avalon and Amy is to work out what the Silence are doing," the Doctor pointed at her as well as the others.

"We know," Rory sighed as he and Lena neared them.

"Every single thing we learn about them brings us a step closer."

"Yeah, Doctor, we get it, we know."

"Have we considered the fact that perhaps the little girl isn't so...normal?" Lena spoke up for the first time since they arrived at the warehouse.

"Well, I'd say she's human, going by the life support software," River informed them before they agreed with Lena.

"But?" the Doctor asked.

"She climbed out of this suit," River sighed, "Like she forced her way out. She must be incredibly strong."

"Incredibly strong and running away," the Doctor tilted his head, "I like her."

"We should be trying to find her."

"Yes, I know, but how?" the Doctor challenged, "Anyway, I have the strangest feeling she's going to find us."

"Why does it look like a NASA space suit?" Lena stared at the spacesuit with confusion.

"Because that's what the Silence do, baby sister," the Doctor pointed, "Think about it. They don't make anything themselves. They don't have to. They get other life forms to do it for them."

"So they're parasites then?" Lena guessed with irritation, "Is that why they took my sister? To put them to work or something?"

"I like the idea," the Doctor nodded, "But we can't be sure. You're right, though, they're like parasites, super parasites more like it. Standing in the shadows of human history since the very beginning. We know they can influence human behavior any way they want. If they've been doing that on a global scale for thousands of years..."

"Then what?" Rory asked.

"Then why did the human race suddenly decide to go to the moon?" everyone looked over at a broadcasting television they had to the side, the Doctor continuing with the theory, "Because the Silence needed a space suit."

~ 0 ~

A while later Rory took a seat on the floor against crates with Amy's nanorecorder, Lena resided inside the TARIS with Avalon's recorder, while the Doctor and River worked on the spacesuit. The Doctor held River's handheld device and looked at the video Canton had recorded of the Silent and grinned with triumph. He shut the device off and turned to River just as they saw the spacesuit gloves twitching.

"This suit, it seems to be repairing itself. How is it doing that?" River blinked and stepped back from the suit, "Doctor, a unit like this, would it ever be able to move without an occupant?"

"Why?"

"Well, the little girl said the space man was coming to eat her. Maybe that's exactly what happened."

They heard the sounds of Amy from the nanrecorder from the crates, "I love you. I know you think it's him. I know you think it ought to be him. But it's not, it's you. And when I see you again, I'm going tell you properly, just to see your stupid face. My life was so boring before you just dropped out of the sky," Rory dropped his head after hearing that, dejectedly, "So just get your stupid face where I can see it. OK? OK?"

Quietly, the Doctor moved over to the crates and sat beside Rory, "She'll be safe for now. No point in a dead hostage."

"Can't you save her?" Rory asked, trying his best not to sound so impatient.

"I can track that signal back. Take us right to her and Avalon."

"Then why haven't you?"

"Because then what? I find them, and then what do I do? This isn't an alien invasion. They live here. This is their empire. This is kicking the Romans out of Rome."

"Rome fell," Rory sighed as he reminded the Doctor of the key fact.

"I know. I was there."

"So was I."

The Doctor agreed and remained quiet for a moment, "Personal question..."

"Seriously?" Rory raised an eyebrow, "You?"

"Do you ever remember it? 2,000 years, waiting for Amy? The Last Centurion?"

"No..."

The Doctor gave him a sharp look, "Are you lying?"

"Course I'm lying!"

"Course you are," the Doctor realized it was pretty stupid to believe Rory could actually forget such a thing, "Not the sort of thing anyone forgets."

"But I don't remember it all the time," Rory shrugged, "It's like there's… a door in my head. I can keep it shut."

"Please come and get me. Come and get me," Amy continued to sob from the recorder.

"Doctor?" they heard Lena call.

The Doctor turned for the brunette who stood at the doorway of the TARDIS with tears on her eyes as she held Avalon's nanorecorder in her hands, blinking red. He hurried towards Lena, looking between the now re-activated nanorecorder and her, "What...what-"

"She screamed, big brother," Lena sniffled, "Like a horror movie, she screamed and then...it went silent again," her voice cracked as she went inside the console room.

"Did she do or say anything?" the Doctor followed her inside, motioning to Rory and River to give them a moment.

"She was telling them to stay away from her," Lena said in the midst of her crying, "Then it went silent," she plopped down on the console chair, "I want her back!"

"We'll get her back, you'll see," the Doctor went over and hugged her, "I promise you we'll get her and Amy back."

"I believe you, don't worry," Lena pulled away and looked up at him, "I just hate that it's taking so long to see them again."

"Yeah, Ava's not going to be too happy about the wait," the Doctor tried to joke and get Lena to at least chuckle.

"No, she knows you're coming, I heard her say it," Lena held up the recorder in her palm, "She believes in you completely."

"Really?"

"You don't believe that, do you?" Lena raised an eyebrow, suddenly suspicious. She cleaned her face of her tears and set the recorder on her side, "A full year of traveling together and you still have doubts?"

"She's a bit sarcastic, you know," the Doctor tried to make an excuse, "Sometimes, it's a bit hard to know when she's being honest..."

"She wasn't like that as a child, you know," Lena sighed, "She had to learn to defend herself from the people in town. Being sarcastic just worked and it stuck with her, like a defense mechanism. But she trusts you completely, I swear. I know it was wrong to do so but..." she sheepishly smiled, "...I sort of read her short stories.

"Lena!" the Doctor blinked, never expecting to hear that from Lena, the most innocent woman he'd ever met.

"Amy was already reading them and when I caught her she sort got me too," Lena shook her head, "Please don't tell Avalon, she'll kill me!"

"She'd never," the Doctor chuckled and put an arm around her shoulders, "But, hey...since you happen to know about those famous stories, you wanna maybe...tell me, what's the big hullabaloo about them?"

Lena smiled softly, "They're...completely fairy-tale, just like her. She really cares about you, you're a lot more important to her than you think."

"How so?" the Doctor found himself a lot more curious than he ought to be about it.

"Your her fairy-tale man," Lena patted his arm and stood up, "And you'll rescue her just like always," she declared with 100% certainty.

~ 0 ~

Amy gasped and came to an awake on a tilted operating table, underneath a bright light, "Where am I? Where is this?"

One of the Silence nearby turned to face her, "You are Amelia Pond."

"You're ugly, has anyone mentioned that to you?" Amy rolled her eyes and saw Avalon on the right side of the room, "Avalon!" the other ginger woman was unconscious, her head lulled to the side, "Avalon! What did you do to her!?" she demanded from the Silence.

"Examined her," the Silence answered.

"Let me go right now!" Amy ordered a she struggled to free herself, her hands strapped down by metal cuffs of the table.

"We do you honor," the Silence corrected, "You will bring the Silence. But your part will soon be over."

"Whatever that means, you've made a big mistake bringing me here, because wait till you see what's coming for you now," Amy smirked and glanced at Avalon, "And that's just her after she wakes up," she nodded to Avalon.

"You have been here many days."

"No, we just got here," Amy shook her head, not about to believe them, "You just put us in here."

"Your memory is weak. You have been here many days."

"No. No, we can't have been," Amy insisted.

"You will sleep now. Sleep, like the girl," the Silence started nearing her.

"No! No! Get off me!"

"Sleep."

"No! No!"

The sounds of the TARDIS materializing stopped it all and the Silence turned to see the Doctor, River, Rory and Lena coming out of the box, the Doctor holding the portable television in his arms, "Oh! Interesting. Very Aickman Road, seen one of these before. Abandoned, wonder how that happened. Oh, well! I suppose I'm about to find out. Rory, River, keep one Silent in eyeshot at all times," he didn't mention Lena as the girl had already ran to her twin's side and tried freeing her, "Oh, hello, sorry. You're in the middle of something. Just had to say though, have you seen what's on the telly? Hello, Amy, you all right? Want to watch some television?" the Doctor set the television on the console, "Hope it doesn't wake up Avalon, poor girl doesn't get enough sleep. Although for your sakes..." he eyed the Silence, "...it might be interesting to watch her after she's been freed, "Ah, now, stay where you are. Because look at me, I'm confident. You want to watch that, me, when I'm confident. Oh, and this is my friend, River. Nice hair, clever, has own gun, and unlike me, she really doesn't mind shooting people. I shouldn't like that. But after what you've lot done...I'm gonna let it slide."

"Not that you could've stopped me," River gave him a sharp look, her tone not one you wanted to challenge. She looked at the Silence with a dark glare in her eyes, "Make a move towards any of us and I'll shoot you all down, make no mistake of that."

"Now maybe you could just listen a minute," the Doctor held a finger to the creatures, "Because all I really want to do is accept your total surrender, and then I'll let you go in peace. You've been interfering in human history for thousands of years. People have suffered and died. But what's the point in two hearts, if you can't be a bit forgiving now and then. Ooh! The Silence. You guys take that seriously, don't you? OK, you got me, I'm lying. I'm not really going to let you go that easily. Nice thought, but it's not Christmas. First," he turned on the television for them to see the broadcasting of the moon-landing, "You tell me about the girl. Who is she? Why is she important? What's she for?" none of the Silence answered and so the Doctor went on, "Guys, sorry. But you're way out of time. Now, come on, a bit of history for you. Aren't you proud, because you helped?" he pulled out the antennae from the television, "Do you know how many people are watching this live on the telly? Half a billion, and that's nothing, because the human race will spread out among the stars, you just watch them fly. Billions and billions of them, for billions and billions of years. And every single one of them, at some point in their lives, will look back at this man, taking that very first step, and they will never, ever forget it," he stopped and watched the screen for the moment and pulled out a phone, "But they'll forget this bit," he spoke into the phone, "Ready?" he received the go from Canton and so hung up, gesturing for them to watch the television. As the moon-landing unfolded, the scene changed to that of the wounded Silence repeating over and over for the humans to kill any Silence they saw, "And one whacking great kick up the backside for the Silence!" the Doctor cheered, "You just raised an army against yourself, "And now, for a thousand generations, you're going to be ordering them to destroy you every day. How fast can you run? Because today's the day the human race throw you off their planet," the Doctor leaned away as the Silence leader advanced on him, "They won't even know they're doing it. I think, quite possibly the word you're looking for right now is, "Oops!" Run! Guys, I mean us!" he turned to the group, hands flailing in the air, "Run!"

As soon as the Silence drew energy to shoot, River began firing on all of them just as she had promised. Meanwhile, the Doctor used his sonic to keep them back.

"We can't get them out!" Lena called to them as she and Rory still worked on the restrains of Avalon and Amy.

Avalon slowly blinked open her eyes, "Wha..."

"Go, just go!" Amy ordered Rory, seeing they were getting no where near close to freeing them.

"We are not leaving without you!" he snapped.

"Will you just get your stupid face out of here?!"

Rory stopped upon those words and looked at Amy with shock.

"Right, into the TARDIS, quickly!" River instructed as she kept her fire on the Silence.

The Doctor ran over and freed Amy then Avalon, "Don't let them build to full power!" he shouted to River as he rejoined her.

"I know. There's a reason why I'm shooting, dumbo!" River rolled her eyes and happened to see him using the sonic again, "What are you doing?"

"Helping!"

River scoffed, "You've got a screwdriver. Go build a cabinet!"

"That's really rude!"

"Shut up and drive!" River pushed him for the TARDIS then noticed Lena struggled to walk Avalon towards the TARDIS, the ginger woman still half asleep, "Doctor!" she called again and pointed to the twins.

The Doctor hurried over and tried helping Lena when the amount of time made its presence and so he scooped Avalon up into his arms and took her and Lena back into the TARDIS. Once gone, River smirked and brought her gun to the fullest of powers, making a complete 360 spin, shooting the Silence dead. She finished and turned for the TARDIS to see Rory standing at the doorway, wearing a dumbfounded expression on the face, "No one saw that right?" River twirled her gun into its holster, "Bad influence and whatnot."

"So, what kind of doctor are you?" was all Rory could think of saying after seeing that.

"Archaeology," River pulled out her gun and fired at a Silence behind her without even looking, "Love a tomb," she smirked and entered the TARDIS.

~ 0 ~

River pushed the Doctor out of the way and started working the controls of the console. The Doctor frowned and tried taking control again, "You can let me fly it!"

"Yeah, and then that one over there is going to throw up with your style of piloting!" River nodded over to Avalon who sat on the stairs with Lena.

"I feel fine now," Avalon repeated for what seemed like the millionth time, "And I'm used to his terrible piloting."

"Yeah, she's fine," the Doctor agreed with a deeper frown.

"Why not instead of arguing you two make it back to the Whitehouse and explain to them what's gonna happen now?" Avalon raised an eyebrow, "Could be a lot more useful, you know."

With a huff from the Doctor, he let River fly the TARDIS to do as Avalon had suggested. They landed in the White House where the Doctor promptly explained to president Nixon how everything would be fine...well, sort of...or perhaps scared them a bit. He left the president and Canton with a hope that Canton could be reinstated into the FBI, after all he only wanted to get married. With that, he flew the TARDIS, he flew it that time, and brought River back to her cell.

He now stood in front of her cell, saying goodbye to her as this time (and as usual) she had helped him once again, "You know...you could come with us..." he offhandedly commented.

"I escape often enough, thank you. And I have a promise to live up to," River nodded, "You'll all understand, soon enough."

"Right," the Doctor ignored the last comment, never really putting much thought into her typical mystery puzzles. He turned and started heading for the TARDIS.

"Say bye to the others for me, please," River called, "And please do take care of them."

The Doctor stopped and considered something before nodding and turning around, "Really?"

"Hm?"

"You want them safe?"

"Yes, that's why I just said to take care of them," River shrugged, confused what he was going on about now.

"River, I know this goes against all the rules about time traveling, especially between us, but I feel compelled to tell you that I was once warned to keep a certain someone away from you or you'd hurt them."

"Oh..." River looked down, guessing which person was that 'certain someone' who should stay away from her.

"If I value that person's life, I should make sure you're far away from her, why?"

"Spoilers," River shrugged.

"I take it you know which one I'm talking about?"

"Avalon."

"Good, now I know I can't really trust you very well at the moment, haven't reached that point, but you could gather up some points if you tell me what to do about that warning?" the Doctor stepped towards her, "Should I really do that? Should I keep her away from you?"

River took a long breath before she looked up, "Yes, you should."

The Doctor was surprised she'd bluntly tell him to do that. He was expecting some sort of argument with shouts about it, something more than...just that.

"I'm telling you that someone told me to keep her away from you," the Doctor repeated, slightly irritated she didn't even care about it.

"Yes, I'm pretty sure I know who it was judging by the point of timeline you and she are in," River shrugged, "Keep her away from me, if you want. But I'm going to tell you right now that many people are going to be after her, I'm not the one you should worry about."

The Doctor raised his eyebrows, "Excuse me?"

"What you heard," River stepped back into her cell and closed the door, "You do what you have to do."

"Frankly, I'm a bit upset you don't even seem to care," the Doctor frowned, "How can you not care!? This is Avalon we're talking about! What's the matter with you?"

"Sheesh, you're overreacting aren't you?" River tilted her head, a faint smirk on her face.

"No, I am not! This is something serious and you're acting like you could care less!"

"You, on the other hand, seem to care a lot more," River remarked with innocent eyes, "More than you probably know."

"What is that supposed to mean?"

"Look, I completely mean what I said," River sighed, "You do what you have to do to keep Avalon safe, no matter who you have to keep her away from."

The Doctor, solemnly, nodded and turned away, vowing to do just that.

~ 0 ~

Once back in the TARDIS, the Doctor worked quite fast to get away from Stormcage, "Rory, I'm going to need thermo couplings. The green ones and the blue ones."

"OK, hold on," Rory rushed for the corridors.

Since the twins were not in the room at the moment, the Doctor took chance and moved to Amy, "So..."

"So?"

"You're OK?"

"Fine. Head's a bit weird," Amy tapped the side of her head, "There's lots of stuff I can't quite remember."

"After effect of the Silence. Natural enough. That's not what I was asking," the Doctor clarified and looked around just in case anyone was around, "You told me you were pregnant."

"Yes," she nodded.

"Why?"

"Because I was. I thought I was. Turns out I wasn't," Amy placed her hands on her flat stomach with a smile.

"No. Why did you tell me?" the Doctor clarified and leaned on the console, crossing his arms.

"You're my friend. You're my best friend."

"Did you tell Rory?"

"No."

"Amy, why tell me and not Rory?"

"Why do you think?" Amy sighed and thought about it for a moment, "I traveled with you in this TARDIS for so long. All that time. If I was pregnant for some of it, wouldn't it have had an effect? I don't want to tell Rory, this baby might have three heads, or like a time head or something."

"What's a time head?" the Doctor raised an eyebrow, amused.

"I don't know, but what if it had one?"

"A time head?"

Amy laughed of embarrassment, "Shut up, alright!" afterwards, the Doctor pointed to the corridors, making Amy realize they hadn't been speaking alone, "Oi! Stupid face."

"Er, yeah. Hello," Rory came out of the corridors with a small wave.

"Taking that away from you, if you're going to listen in all the time," Amy pointed at the recorder Rory had in his hand and was trying to hide from her.

"OK, that's a fair point. But you should've told me that you thought you were pregnant," Rory tried to make a valid argument, "I'm a nurse, I'm good with pregnancy."

Amy laughed, "Not, as it turns out, that good," she walked up and met him halfway, giving him a hug, "So can you stop being stupid?"

"Er, no. Never. I'm never, ever going to stop being stupid!" Rory shrugged and made her laugh again.

"So, this little girl, it's all about her. Who was she?" the Doctor wondered for a moment as he returned to the console, "Or we could just go off and have some adventures. Anyone in the mood for adventures? I am. You only live once."

At those words, Amy and Rory remembered the Doctor's death and kept quiet. While the Doctor had a pregnancy scan on Amy, which was confusingly switching from positive and negative, Lena came around from the second level rails, "I'm ready to go home now, big brother!" she called as Avalon emerged from the corridor upstairs.

"Do you have to leave so early, baby sister?" the Doctor pouted as she came down the stairs, "I was just telling Amy and Rory we could take an adventure."

"I'd love to but my dad is expecting me home," Lena shrugged, "Plus, I've made my choice about these travels," she smiled softly, "And I'm good where I am now, trust me."

"Oh c'mon, just one little adventure? Give those sisterly bracelets another trip around?" the Doctor nodded to the matching bracelets Lena had gotten for her and Avalon as a Christmas present. "Show them off?"

Lena looked at her sister who also gave her a pleading look. She supposed just one trip wouldn't hurt anyone, "Well...alright," the others cheered which made her laugh, "But just one trip, big brother, alright? Only one."

"I swear," the Doctor raised a hand for his promise.

Lena clapped excitedly, "Well then, take us some where fantastic!" she pointed to the console.

"Can do," the Doctor nodded and quickly worked the controls while the humans clung on, wondering just where the Doctor would land them and how much trouble they'd be in soon enough.

[dkronpa]

Chapter 3: Journey to Despair, Grave Secrets, Grave Lies ~Post-Trial~

//And the end of chapter 3 is finally upon us! I hope you all enjoy I’ll start working on chapter 4 immediately, hope you all enjoy!

“Wowee! Three for three! You got it right once again, the one who punched a bunch of holes in Toson Shinko was none other than the Ultimate Thanatologist, Tsukiko Ishikawa!” Monokuma announced.

 “Please refrain from describing it in such a grotesque way.” Ishikawa-san said.

 Sly-san looked at Kurosaki-san, “You were right, huh? What the hell?”

 “What can I say? It’s just what happens.” Kurosaki-san shrugged nonchalantly. Whatever happened with Kurosaki-san’s plan is definitely suspicious, but for now…

 “I…just can’t really believe it…Ishikawa-san’s always been such a big help during the investigations and has helped everyone by supporting them, so…I don’t understand why. Why, of all people, did you end up killing someone?” Kurohiko-san asked.

 “The motive, obviously. Tsukiko-chan must have had a list of really important people in her life that she couldn’t afford to pick any of them.” Amaterasu-san said.

 “…I’m afraid that’s not my reasoning at all.” She admitted.

 “Huh?” Amaterasu-san cocked an eyebrow. Ishikawa-san’s shoulders slumped as she took a breath.

 “I’m afraid I did not have much time left with all of you. My body was destined to give out on me soon during our imprisonment here.” She said.

 “Wh…what the hell does that mean?” Okanaya-kun asked.

 “I am a corpse. My body is decaying. I am slowly returning to my eternal slumber. Why, only a few days ago, I found my hair falling out in clumps during a shower. I fear that if I stepped back into water, I would waste away…”

 “Now that I think about it, I suggested we all go to the pool after the motive reveal, but you seemed really against that idea…was that because…?”

 “I’m sorry, Kirishima-sama. I did not mean to hurt your feelings but snapping at you back then. At this point it matters not. My body shall be thrown away no matter what happens from here on. What a dreadfully awful result I’ve ended up in.” Ishikawa-san laughed to herself.

 “Why Herr Shinko…?” Kurosaki-san asked. Ishikawa-san stopped laughing almost immediately, “for all the time I sat and thought, I couldn’t come up with a reason as to why you decided he should die. I know you two didn’t get along, but was that really enough for someone like you…?”

 Ishikawa-san’s expression turning thoughtful for a moment before answering. “Shinko-sama was not…respectable. Unlike the rest of our group, Shinko-sama refused to ever reveal who he was to us. I loathe ingenuine people. If it were to be anyone, it would have to have been him. Life is a sacred thing, you see. Everyone in this room values life and lives their lives as well as they can. As someone who was lucky enough to be given a second chance, anyone who has no care for life infuriates me.”

 “I don’t get what you mean at all.” Kurohiko-san admitted.

 “Shinko-sama had no value for his life. Or anyone else’s. It was not a thing of importance in his eyes, that is what I mean to say.” Ishikawa-san clarified.

 “No, on a fundamental level I can get what you’re saying, but…I refuse to believe Shinko-kun was like that. Sure, he was abrasive and rude and a little selfish, but to suggest he had no care for his or anyone’s lives?! Isn’t that going too far?!”

 “Did any of us really know him though?” Graves-san suddenly spoke, “I mean…put your hand up if you would have said you and Toson were close.” Nobody moved, “so, none of us can really say Tsukiko is wrong about him. For all we know, he could have been selfish enough to not value our lives. Maybe he was getting ready to kill while he was hiding in his room all that time.”

 “There was no evidence of such a thing.” Asano-san argued.

 “So? You need hard evidence? What if he was calculating enough to do it all in his head? He’s a director, after all, it could have played out in his head like a movie.”

 “Graves-san…!” Asano-san’s fists balled up.

 “To think…it wasn’t even Monokuma’s motive that got you to kill someone. It’s so stupid, I could cry out of pity.” Graves-san laughed a little. What the hell? I’d never seen this side of her before. “Hey, Tsukiko…I’ve got to wonder about you and your little ‘zombie’ theory.”

 “I am not a zombie.” Ishikawa-san said.

 “Yeah, I know. Let me ask though, what do you think will happen to you next…? I mean, you already see yourself as dead. Don’t you? So, what does an execution mean for a walking corpse?”

 “Well, it means…that is…” Ishikawa-san stopped and frowned.

 “I mean, if you’re a conscious dead person, does that mean even if Monokuma crushes your body into paste, you’ll still be conscious? What are the rules for someone that’s been reanimated? Tell me. Tell me, please.”

 “Stop this, please.” Ishikawa-san shifted uncomfortably.

 “Tell me tell me tellmetellmetellme-“

 “STOP!!” Ishikawa-san suddenly shouted, “I…d-don’t you understand?! That’s why I had to get out! We…we don’t know how long we have been trapped in here, but I didn’t think much about that at the start! Th-then…my hair started falling out, it felt like my skin was becoming thin, like if I rubbed it, it would tear apart…it could only have been a matter of time before I was left as nothing, and then what would happen to my body?! I…I couldn’t waste away in here!”

 “Ah…hey, Nagata. Remember what Kirishima’s first motive said? The thing about the 8 days ending today? You don’t think…?”

 “It was your card, Ishikawa-san. Kirishima-san’s card was a time limit for how long you thought you had left before your body would waste away into nothing.” I concluded.

 “…so, that was my first motive…? My unfinished business? I didn’t even think of it. I just…wished to see the outside world one last time before my final departure…” Ishikawa-san clasped her hands together, a tear falling from one of her eyes.

 “I see, I see…well, even corpses gotta get their comeuppance, right?! Just cause you’re dead, doesn’t mean you’re exempt from consequences!” Monokuma suddenly chimed in.

 “It can’t be time already?!” Ishikawa-san gasped.

 “Now, let’s get to the main event! I’ve prepared a very special punishment for the Ultimate Thanatologist, Tsukiko Ishikawa!”

 She took a breath to calm herself. An expression of acceptance appearing on her face. “…I do hope to pass on properly this time, I suppose. Please do not allow me to linger or revive again, I do not deserve another chance.” Ishikawa-san sighed, bringing her hands close to her chest, “I’ll offer up a final prayer. For Shinko-sama’s soul…and hopefully my own.”

 “Let’s give it everything we’ve got! Iiiiiit’s PUNISHMENT TIME!!!”

 “…Memento Mori…”

 -Game Over- -Tsukiko Ishikawa has been found Guilty!- -Commencing Execution-

 The monitor turned on after Ishikawa-san had been dragged away in the same manner Kibe-san and Hachi-san had been and displayed Ishikawa-san laying down in a black coffin holding a bouquet of white flowers. A headstone sitting right behind the coffin.

 -Tsukiko Ishikawa's execution: Black Thread Hell-

 Monokuma appears next to the open casket with a black marker and proceeds to wildly scribble black lines across Ishikawa-san’s body, arms, and legs, along with a moustache and glasses on her face, before slamming it shut. From inside the coffin a large rumbling noise can be heard, Ishikawa-san waits until the rumbling dies down before trying to move. She wipes away the marker on her face and opens up the coffin, only to find herself in a hell-like place with huge jagged mountains and trees.

 As she looks around, a huge Asura-looking creature approaches her from behind, armed with swords and axes. She climbs out and runs, with the Asura swinging at her, but always seeming to miss. She runs through black trees and thorn bushes, and jumps a jagged rock, where it looks like she's safe. However, as she takes a step forward, she realizes her leg is bleeding along one of the black lines. As she reaches down to examine it, one of her fingers fall off.

 In a moment of confusion, terror and elation, Tsukiko looks down to see blood seeping out of all the lines. Her left hand drops off at the wrist, then her right arm midway down, then all of it above the elbow. As she tries to take another step forward, her lower leg drops off at the knee. She collapses into a pile of meat slices, organs, and blood.

-

“Uuuu….urrrgg…bleugh!” Kirishima-san collapsed in the corner; the sound of her vomiting made my stomach turn. Ishikawa-san…there’s no way she deserved to go so brutally. Kibe-san and Hachi-san weren’t exactly executed tamely, but this felt on a whole other level…

 “G-good god…” Yokozawa-san covered his mouth, his face earning a green tint. It seems most of us were feeling the same way. This was too much.

 “Monokuma. What the hell was that? Even for you, that seemed graphic.” Sly-san demanded.

 “Hmm? I dunno what you mean. If anything, I think it’s pretty in-line with what she did to Shinko, don’t you? I mean, those other two just stabbed and bashed but this girl threw him in an iron maiden! That’s some real crazy stuff there! It’s only fitting an execution be just as horrifying as the murder, right?!”

 “This really is just a joke to you, isn’t it?!” Okanaya-kun spat.

 “No way. I’m taking this seriously. I’m taking this more seriously than anyone else.” Monokuma said.

 “Eheheh…hahahah…” Graves-san covered her mouth trying to laugh, “geez. This really is a far cry from Maemi getting stabbed in the back- literally. Now people are getting sliced into piles of mush, piece by piece…I don’t wanna end up like that. I don’t wanna end up like that at all.”

 “Graves-san…”

 “Ah, Junpei, don’t worry. I won’t kill you. You and I are friends! You’re pretty much the only person I have a little trust left in at this point. Even then it’s thin. Saori showed us you can’t trust the quiet ones, Tomoe showed you can’t trust your friends, Tsukiko just showed you can’t even trust those who try to be helpful. Anyone could stab us in the back at any moment.” Graves-san smirked. “Scaaaaary.”

 “This is an unexpected change in your behaviour. Is this your survival instincts kicking in, I wonder?” Kurosaki-san said.

 “Ah, who know? If anything, you’re the one I trust the least. What was it Sly was saying earlier about you, huh? That you just seemed to know things…what was that all about? Are you some secret psychic?” Graves-san got closer to Kurosaki-san until they were staring at each other, faces inches apart. “I wanna learn all your secrets. Will you give me the chance?”

 “Knock yourself out. But I’d rather die than let you learn anything about me.” Kurosaki-san smiled.

 “Careful what you wish for~” Graves-san half-cheered, “Ah! But I’m suuuuper tired! Hey, Monokuma is it okay to leave now that the execution is done? I gotta get some serious Z’s for tomorrow! I wonder what’ll happen?”

 “Hmm? Oh, yeah. You guys are dismissed. I gotta go find a mop and bucket.” Monokuma waved goodbye as he headed down the hall to the execution room.

 “Oh, Junpei! We gotta grab breakfast tomorrow so I’ll meet with you a little after the morning announcement. Cool?”

 “Y-yeah…cool.” Yokozawa-san nodded nervously. Graves-san flashed a bright, almost innocent smile and skipped to the elevator, taking the ride back up alone.

 “She’s dangerous.” Amaterasu-san said almost immediately.

 “Hey now…” Yokozawa-san tried.

 “W-we should tie her up, just in case! I’m worried about her after she said all that. Should we even trust somebody that’s got a talent like Ultimate Secret Agent…? She’s definitely gonna be able to kill without hesitation.” Kurohiko-san said.

 “You’re saying that as if the Ultimate Assassin isn’t in the room.” Yokozawa-san argued.

 “You ever seen Sly genuinely threaten someone so happily like that?! That bitch is off her fuckin’ nut!” Okanaya-kun shot back.

 “Shut up! You were the one that threatened everybody in the early days, and now you have the nerve to judge someone else?! None of you even know her! She’s probably just as scared as everybody else but you just wanna all focus your own fear on an easy target!” Yokozawa-san snapped.

 “H-hey now…”

 “You’re the worst for it, Nagata-kun. Y-you…you never do anything to help out, but as soon as a murder happens, you’re some big hero?! Don’t screw with me! Why…why do you get to be a hero when you don’t even have a talent…?”

 “The fuck’re you talkin’ about?! Nagata’s the Ultimate Lucky Student!” Okanaya-kun argued.

 “He doesn’t seem very lucky to me. Then again, didn’t you say your talent affects the people around you…? So, answer me this then. Why the fuck are we all stuck in here if you’re so goddamn lucky? Why have we had to watch people die over and over and over again if you’re supposed to bring us all good fortune…?” Yokozawa-san’s hands were balled up into trembling fists. “I…w-wanna go home already…! Just let me go home now…!”

 “I…I don’t know…I don’t know why this keeps happening.” I admitted. He’s right. What good is my talent if we’re in this situation. How can I even call myself the Ultimate Lucky Student?

 “Of course you don’t. God, if you died at least the situation would make a little more sense-“

 WHAP!

 We all stood stunned. Yokozawa-san stumbled back, holding onto his cheek where Kirishima-san had hit. Her eyes were welling up, her hand, the palm slightly red, was shaking so violently she had to hold it with her other hand.

 “Don’t say that, please…we shouldn’t be fighting like this…not after what just happened.” She pleaded. “It’s not Nagata-kun’s fault…it’s not Graves-san’s fault. It’s nobody’s fault except Monokuma’s! So we shouldn’t be standing here trying to pin the blame on anybody.”

 “R-Ram-san…”

 “It’s Kirishima.” She corrected, wiping the traces of tears. “Yokozawa-kun, please keep an eye on Graves-san for us. You’re the only one she’ll trust right now. We need to get our group back together. We need teamwork.”

 “She is right. The fighting and blaming will not improve our situation.” Asano-san agreed. “So…let us reconvene tomorrow, yes? There will most likely be a new building for us to search, so it will be the opportune time for us to rebuild our relationships. Even if it must be from scratch.”

 “Yeah…that’s fine.” I said, glancing at Yokozawa-san. He was refusing to even look in my direction. I’ll need to try and talk to him tomorrow.

 “Then…let us head back.” Asano-san said.

 -Chapter 2, Post Trial, Ryuu-

 I sat laid there and stared at my ceiling, going over Yokozawa-san’s words in my mind. I never thought about it now. Everyone without fail had been blessed by good luck when I was around them, so why not now…? Why was this the moment my talent was deciding to fail me? Can talents just stop?

 “Is something wrong with me?” I wondered aloud, sitting up in my bed. I didn’t feel any different. Out of the corner of my eye I saw the motive card. My motive. I just figured Monokuma would come and collect them himself after the motive was over, but I guess not. I shook my head, taking the motive card and throwing it in the trash.

 I never had to think of this awful motive again. I don’t have to think about what would’ve happened if Shinko-san wasn’t killed. Shinko-san was killed, so everyone on that card was safe.

 “Oh god…” I internally gasped, “why am I thinking like that…?” This game has really taken its toll. Or maybe… “Am I a bad person…?”

 -Chapter 2, Post Trial, Yuuki-

 “Ah…this is frustrating. I figured someone would break by this point, but for it to be Mademoiselle Graves is really…problematic.” Yuuki said. Sly tapped his foot annoyedly waiting for Yuuki to finish lamenting the situation. With a defeated huff, Yuuki crossed his arms and mimicked Sly’s standing position, slightly mockingly.

 “You said you would tell me the truth if I helped you out. Now, are you going to go through with that promise or not?” Sly asked.

 “You’re so impatient. You have no respect for suspense, or perhaps you just really hate spending time with me.”

 “Do you want me to answer that?”

 “Mean!” Yuuki pointed overdramatically. “If you’re gonna be so mean, I’ll never reveal anything to you!”

 “Oi…” Sly warned, a hand in his pocket.

 “Oh please, I know all you have is that dog tag.”

 “Then I’ll beat you up with my fists.” Sly cracked his knuckles, edging towards Yuuki.

 “Fine, fine.” Yuuki lifted up his shirt and pulled out a small journal with a leather cover that was tucked away on his waistline. “…I hope you realise the risks you’re taking by getting yourself involved with this.”

 “I am. You said we can end the killing game if we work together.”

 “Yes, that’s still my hypothesis. If you’re completely sure, then go ahead and read this journal. Read how the rest of this killing game goes…” Yuuki presented Sly with the journal.

 And Sly took it.

 -Chapter 3: Journey to Despair, Grave Secrets, Grave Lies END-

-10 Students Remain-

[popatochisssp]

I've been working on my own fic but I had to take a two month hiatus for mental health. i just posted chapter three this morning and I thought everyone was gonna be mad at me for being gone so long, but every one really seems to like the newest chapter and character! I even got 1300 hits when before it was 1012 (i think)! I kinda wanted to tell someone😅 Also, any advice on not getting burn out on long stories?

Yeah, readers can be surprisingly great like that sometimes! :D

It was nice to get that new chapter notification from you, though, ngl

Regarding burnout… I guess I’d say it’s important to take breaks? I mean, obviously you don’t want to be taking really long breaks and end up accidentally on hiatus for several months, I’ve been there and am desperately trying not to make that mistake again, but like!

Try to figure out what your schedule is for writing– when you usually have the time and energy to do it– and ideally find a way to make that your Writing Time and commit to it. The rest of the time, though…? Breaks!

Music, chilling, naps, even reading other fics, whatever your relaxation thing is, make sure you’re doing it! If you’re constantly thinking about your story, even when you don’t actually have time to do any work on it, it can definitely start to frustrate you and burn you out a little.

So…when you’re working, be working, but when you’re relaxing, you gotta be relaxing, too, not simultaneously trying to write in your head, if that makes any sense?

At least that’s how it is for me! My Writing Time tends to be weekends, so during the week, I don’t really think about whatever my long-running fic at the time is (currently DL!), but then when the weekend comes I try to buckle down and focus because it’s Writing Time now and if I don’t get any work done, I know I’m probably not gonna have another chance until next weekend and be disappointed about it, so the self-imposed deadline is a good motivator! And the part in between where I’m not writing is a little like a mental palate cleanser so it’s easier to start refreshed when it’s time to work again.

Oh, also I guess try not to spread yourself too thin! If you’ve got your long story going, it’s totally cool to switch up to a one-shot or something every now and again just to break things up, but it’s…probably not a great idea to have a bunch of projects going on at once, especially something like 3+ longer stories that you’re trying to balance in addition to one-shots or whatever. You’re committing yourself to a lot when you do that and it can feel overwhelming if you have so many things you feel you could/should be updating but only so much energy to work with… You either end up feeling guilty no matter what you choose ‘cause you’re ignoring the other things for it, or you end up paralyzed entirely and update nothing ‘cause you couldn’t make the decision. Not fun! =/

Hopefully that’s some helpful tips/tricks/insight, everybody works different and I hardly know what I’m doing myself, so y’know…that’s just my two cents on things, anyway! XD

[thehivemindwrites]

A  Series of Disconnected Thoughts, Cast into the Void in No Particular Order

1. I’ve been finding myself thinking more and more about Kill Six Billion Demons recently. Not just because it’s absolutely gorgeous artwork and Moebius-meets-prog-metal stylings are extremely my shit (KSBD is responsible for adding Gojira to my rotation of workout music, and that alone has me in its debt), but because I can really appreciate a main character who is a walking disaster coming to some kind of enlightenment through a combination of getting her ass handed to her repeatedly, making questionable decisions, and basically just deciding to struggle forwards because I don’t know, what the fuck else is there to do? It’s hardly original (see: basically any shounen about The Power of Friendship and Not Giving Up) but damn if the presentation of it in this particular case isn’t particularly delightful. Plus it gave us the image of a giant hulking demon wearing a jacket that says KILL BOSS and that’s rad.The creator of KSBD is also co-creator, as it happens, of the newly released Lancer TTRPG, which I backed on Kickstarter and will, one day, get a rad fucking hardcover copy of (but for now I’m reading through the pdf and swearing oaths that one day I will play it). Anyway, as someone who also got where he is through a series of questionable decisions and getting his ass handed to him by life in general (oh, and an enormous amount of luck), I can relate. Plus the phrase “Reach heaven through violence,” while kind of terrible on the surface, feels good to shout at yourself while you’re off for a run. 

2. Part of this whole exercise thing - a side-effect of it, if you wanna call it that - is that generally I feel better about myself like in general. I’ve mentioned that before. What it doesn’t do, of course, is magically mean that I’m now 100% good and not still dogged by a persistent sense of self-loathing that I’ve just had to accept will never really go away. Like for example: I’ve lost 35 kg since starting this whole gym thing, except you might remember the goal was 40. I still haven’t hit that goal, and frankly I’ve spent the last like three months bouncing around the same like, 3 kg zone because I’ve been traveling a lot and that basically fucks up my workout and eating routine. It’s frustrating, and it sure does let the part of me that knows deep down that I’m a fat fucker and always will be no matter what I do run wild from time to time. Which is, I’m coming to understand, just gonna always be there. This stuff doesn’t go away! Ever! 

Which doesn’t mean it’s right, even a little. You tune it out and throw yourself into battle with it over and over again. You get bloodied and broken and claw back and then you get bloodied and broken some more. Insert that gif from Princess Bride of Westly saying LIFE IS PAIN, HIGHNESS here. Thing is, there’s something about the struggle that’s nice. I am not sure how motivated I’d be to do anything if part of it wasn’t motivated by the desire to prove my dumb brain wrong about, uh, me. If I wasn’t fighting the various little demons that plague me every so often, I doubt I’d be so well-adjusted. I certainly wouldn’t be mentally healthy. None of this makes sense as I read it back, of course - it sounds like I’m saying “boy it’s nice to be miserable,” which isn’t true. Being miserable sucks shit! I don’t recommend it! But it is nice to see misery coming and punch it in the face (metaphorically speaking). Sometimes I think the thing that makes me go to the gym and work so hard (this sounds like I’m bragging, but I can assure you I’m not - “work so hard” means “not collapse and fall off the elliptical after five minutes because oh god I don’t want to be here”) is out of some desire for self-annihilation through pushing myself past my physical limits. Reach heaven through violence (see, I told you it sounded cool).

3. The world has gotten really fucking bad for a lot of people, and I don’t know that it will get better for them any time soon. In fact, given the latest talk from the ol’ UN Climate Change report, it’s gonna get even worse. I would very much prefer that were not the case! It’s motivation enough to get out and vote and shit, at least for me - and as someone who is, you know, ridiculously privileged, that’s the absolute least I can do. Which is why I try to do more, mostly involving donating money to causes that seem like they’re able to cause the sort of trouble that needs to be caused. Or just use expertise to protect the people I don’t know how to protect, because I’m a lot of things, and one of them happens to be smart enough to know that I don’t know shit. So I make sure people that do know shit have the money they need. Pretty straightforward, I think. 

The other thing I try to do, because giving money isn’t really something I think about much at all (I’m stupidly fucking fortunate to have a job that pays well, remember), is occasionally go out and actually be present at protests and the like - there are a lot of climate protests and they’re all a good time. Occasionally it’s worth overcoming one’s intense social anxiety to do so. Lord knows it’s significantly less of a risk for me to be out shouting at cops than most. 

4. She-Ra might be one of the best shows out there. There’s something nice about a show that both does and does not present a simple world. Yes, the Horde is bad. Like, objectively bad! They do a lot of looting and subjugating and are generally just deeply not chill people.On the other hand, the people who make up the Horde are still people, and I have a lot of time for a show that can manage to humanize its Big Bad Villain whilst still making it very clear they are  still, you know, not good. It’s messy, and complicated, and sad, because sometimes you have to fight people you used to be friends with! Sometimes you have to make the call that hey, we can’t be friends anymore, because I can’t support the things you’re doing anymore. I’ve made that call before - I bet everyone has, at some point (if you haven’t, I’m sure you’ll have to eventually). Fortunately for me, it’s never been that difficult of a choice, if only because the people I had to go against weren’t people I’d known for very long. 

Anyway, that’s part of it - you gotta just cut people out sometimes. There’s more to it though, because the other thing the show believes is that everyone - even the real shitty people - can change. It doesn’t mean everything’s forgiven, and it doesn’t erase all the bad shit, but they can still change. It’s worth changing, even if it isn’t a cure-all. 

So yeah, I like She-Ra a lot. It’s also just well-written, and funny, and it’s a real good time to see a bunch of diverse characters running around having adventures and being fuckin’ rad. Plus, they’ve shown an incredible willingness to completely change the stakes from season to season - the end of season four in particular is  the equivalent of detonating all the things you thought were important. It pulls a bait and switch so ruthless that I might have applauded if I wasn’t so self-conscious about making noise that my neighbors might hear. The combination of season 3 and 4 was a masterclass on raising the stakes and then explaining that actually, you were playing for stakes even higher than you could’ve thought possible. Oh, and the people you thought you could trust were just using you, and hey, what if we got rid of the thing that you’ve more or less defined yourself by for the entire show? Good luck in season five, motherfucker! I’m a fan, is what I’m saying.

6. Work on Vanquisher 2103 continues apace. I mentioned this before, but we’re doing a once-a-month schedule while the holidays and work beat my ass into the ground, and as it turns out I really enjoy taking a full month to write a chapter. It’s a comically slow pace, but it’s working for me and hopefully the fact that the chapters have tended to be a little longer (and allowed me to expand on ideas a little more, and do a little more research here and there) makes it worth the longer wait. I’d like this thing to be good! There’s a part of my brain, again, that will always insist that nobody reads this and it’s bad and I’m fucking up, constantly - that point, at least, is probably accurate. I am writing characters who in theory have life experiences that are very much Not Mine, which involves a lot of reading things from people who would know better than I do. It’s nerve-wracking, and the only thing I am bone-deep certain of is that I’ll fuck up and hopefully y’all will forgive me for fucking up when that happens. I’ll keep reading and refining and eventually maybe it’ll be okay. Hopefully, anyway.

7. I went to Ireland and guys, Ireland is bullshit. I am offended by its gorgeous cliff-sides and open grasslands and heart-rending beauty. The immense friendliness of the people I met and the fact that you can’t sit in a pub without hearing some dude play a jaunty reel on a tin whistle or accordion or something is a personal insult. I was Arthur Dent angrily demanding to know why this bloody fish is so good the whole time.

I cultivated an immense drinking habit while there. I was also approached by a random German tourist who somehow clocked that I could speak German and we shouted about socialism for an hour auf Deutsch. I met some woman from Louisiana and we ended up having drinks a couple nights in a row to talk about traveling in general and Germany in particular, because her ex-husband is German. There were some Swedish retirees who were both very pleased by their country’s social safety net and also depressingly sour about the fact that refugees got cheap dental care - we might have had some harsh words exchanged before more drinks helped smooth over our frank discussion of differing viewpoints. I had to explain American health care to some people from the UK who were surprisingly gung-ho about the idea of privatized medicine until they talked to me (one of them talked about how the UK used to be an Empire and could be again in such a way that made me want to throw things. We did not talk for very long because I couldn’t fuckin’ handle it). These were strangers that I willingly engaged, because I was having an adventure, and I guarantee none of this would have happened if I hadn’t been going to the gym and committed to the idea of proving the voice in my head that tells me I’m an awkward mess that nobody would ever want to talk to in their life wrong (also, let’s be honest, if I hadn’t had several pints of cider at the time). 

By the end of the trip if I heard one more pub singer’s version of Whisky in the Jar though, that I was gonna produce my pistol and fucking shoot myself in the head.

Go to Ireland if you can. If you live there, fuck you how dare you live somewhere that rad.

8. I didn’t have an eighth thing but I’m committed to this “each thing is numbered” bit which means that even the end of this thing has to follow the trope. This is the end of the post where I say “okay bye I’ll be back the next time I get the urge to throw a bunch of highly unpolished ideas out.” 

[ryouverua]

Trial 6 -  ”hello, world!” (6)

Time to pick up the fallen torch.

Trial: 1 / 2 / 3 / 4 / 5

K.... K1-b0? This - this must be you, right?

I’ve been waiting for this moment since the beginning of the chapter 3 trial! Finally, the explanation I’ve been craving! If - if the inner voice is coming into play now - it might actually be a benevolent force, right? Maybe? At this point we just need something to keep us moving forward...

Yes!!!

..... Oops.

“And please choose the right answer this time.”

Okay okay, jeez -

K1... K1-b0? W-Why not - ?

...... remedy the situation. Not save... but fix...???

Voices??? It’s plural now? Does that include me, the player?

K1-b0! Your moment has finally come, with no more lasers or explosions required! hopefully

WAIT

WE’RE OFFICIALLY IN HIS POV NOW???

This is incredibly late game for a protagonist switch b-but okay! also oh god what does that say about Sweetcheeks’s condition -

I’m glad we haven’t completely lost Shuichi. ): He really does look like he’s not with us, though. How can we help him? I joke about how much I love this sprite, but it’s awful seeing him like this.

But apparently Shuichi’s been relegated to the sidelines entirely now, because K1-b0 is entirely focused on Jun - Tsumugi. Oh boy, I almost started thinking of her as Junko. I will not let her hide behind her characters, damn it!

Yes! Yes, exactly! She can’t have it both ways!

YOU’RE NOT ALLOWED TO BE ANNOYED YOU APPARENTLY WROTE HIM TO BE THIS WAY!!!

Ooh? Yeah, the text is changing at the bottom...

U U H   I’M SORRY YOU CAN’T JUST DROP A BOMB LIKE THAT SO ABRUPTLY -

TSUMUGI LET HIM HAVE HIS COOL MOMENT

HE LITERALLY JUST GOT HIS MOMENT IN THE SUN DON’T JUST UNDERCUT HIM OUT OF NOWHERE 

no seriously she didn’t even give him a chance to build up momentum

The way she’s able to just dismiss him so casually like that, just completely trivializing him, is absolutely brutal. also what plotline lol -

I-I mean I’m joking, he has had a ‘coming to terms with his status as a robot amongst humans and accepting himself’ plotline! Sorta! It’s just been pretty.... well, behind the scenes. I just wished we got to see more of you and Miu together at the very least.

Wait -

He’s been the actual audience’s surrogate? That.... that means his ahoge....... really is the connection to the outside... but also, the only thing holding him back from going kamikaze??? It’s basically an outside force that’s been suppressing his free will?

Oh shit... is that why the game switched us to this POV, for that reveal? Well-damn-played, DRV3!

.....

wow this is getting worse and worse, huh

ALSO OH NO WAY TO SMASH HIS FRAGILE SELF-ESTEEM INTO PIECES

“You know all those hi~lar~ious asides everyone had at your expense about you being no more important than your average kitchen appliance? Guess what - ! They were r i g h t!”

Somehow I wonder if it would have been better if it was the mastermind’s will. At least it would assign him some sense of importance, even if that stinging feeling of betraying his friends would be there. At least he wouldn’t literally just be the subject of some nameless audiences’ whims - as it is, he’s basically been relegated to the status of ‘plaything’.

From Chapter 3 onward, when I was thinking about it, I wasn’t sure originally if I should consider it a force for good or evil - it seemed to be generally benevolent and since he didn’t take any actions against anyone, it was generally okay for me to discard it as an extension of ‘a mastermind whose goal was for everyone to be at odds with each other/kill each other’. He was always one of the most willing to cooperate with the others, too! I even considered if any of his actions had indirectly caused tension or murder, and I couldn’t find any instances where he did. But if he’s been at the beck and call of a third party, who’s been directing him for the sake of entertainment? Well, that’s a completely different story. In that context... everything makes... a lot more sense...

.... Except for his Chapter 5 actions??? He nearly got Shuichi to take him out twice??

Wait, actually - oh, this does change how I might look at him from this point on. How often would he consult the voice? Do the decisions override his own every time? Does that mean he can only make a move at the behest of the audience????

THE WAY HE PUT IT IS EVEN MORE DEMEANING

fhgh I guess that answers one of my questions

THE GIMMICK....

every production buzzword thrown in makes my stomach drop more

S-Shit the last time he had his ‘short-circuiting’ sprite was when Kokichi did his mastermind reveal in tandem with the ‘outside world’ reveal - D:

A.... Are you trying to make them feel bad for you, because I don’t think it’s working -

omg I just realized there would totally be twitter threads and reddit posts and stuff dedicated to this, and I’m trying to imagine the rage!posts that would swarm them as users ran to the internet to bitch about how ‘the robot totally isn’t responding to us anymore!’ and ‘I bet they’re rigging it so the ending goes the way they want! What a cop out ending!’ and hell, one of those more topical ‘let 👏 us 👏 control 👏 the 👏 robot 👏 you 👏 cowards 👏’

K1-B0 WAS THE CAMERA?!?!

..................................

glances at my computer monitor, then back here

ahahaha I am officially part of the outside world!mastermind tomfoolery oh god I’m so sorry everyone

Wait.... wait. Wait! So the Nanokumas’ footage is for the mastermind’s exclusive use? Really?

I... I was under the impression that if this audience was watching everyone, they’d have access to everything....

Then how different would this all look from only K1-b0′s eyes?! Did he know about Kaito’s training, for example? About Kaede and Shuichi’s practical inseparability in the first chapter? Wow, how different would this entire thing look from K1-b0′s exclusive POV?

I’m sorry what?

okay okay she’s going off on a despair rant which is - y’know, great, you do you and whatever - but I think it just turned my brain off a little bit. Like I just got catapulted back to DR1.

A-Are we really turning back to the whole ‘Junko persona’ idea? That she took on that role specifically, and by taking on the role as ‘Junko Enoshima’ she feels obligated to follow it through to the end? B-But...... but??? For a show??? That’s... no, that can’t be right, that’s weird, that’s stupid, that can’t be right....

You gotta admire her dedication to the craft I-I MEAN NO

WHAT THE HELL TSUMUGI

THAT IS NOT A GOOD ENOUGH MOTIVE

WHAT THE HELL IS THAT KIND OF REASON

SHUT THE FUCK UP KOMAEDA AND DON’T LOOK SO HAPPY ABOUT THIS oh that actually felt pretty good

i say this as someone whose previous favourite was komaeda it was very love/hate don’t @ me

Oh hey, the opening music is on! Is this the big turnabout we’ve been waiting for? It’s.... so.... weird that it’s coming from K1b0 now? Also wasn’t this sort of the plot of the DR3 anime via the Ultimate Animator or -

I??? I guess??? Weren’t they all just screaming DESPAIR at Shuichi a minute ago??? Isn’t it their comments on the screen???

Inspirational and all but -

I’m GoINg to cHOkE anD DiE

ULTIMATE HOPE ROBOT

FJKGHSDKLFJ

WHAT ARE YOU KIDDING ME

oh shit well there’s text saying Hope now so I guess something has changed out there

I believe it’s called déjà vu.

No seriously, am I hallucinating? Is this not what led to the whole final vote in DR1 or am I going crazy? Is this... what is.... happening........???? And Shuichi has just completely BSoDed in the corner??? Like, is he disassociating right now? Where is he?

It’s interesting that she looks happy here compared to angry Junko. She looked excited earlier when K1-b0 challenged her too (her new jazz-hands!sprite, lol) too, and her voice is on the brink of. Uh. I’m just going to say it’s getting very.... passionate. Is she just that confident or...?

Oh hey their sprites mirror each other. Parallels. :D

I like how Tsumugi is having Makoto say this part ~

But this brings up a good question... how exactly is this so-called final battle going to work? If they can’t fight for the right to leave, then what can they do?

alksdfj Himiko and Maki have also been so quiet this so time - I almost forgot they were there. K1-b0 and Tsumugi are basically the only ones doing the talking and between all the cosplays it feels like there are way more people here than there actually are - which is the point, I think? It really adds to that oppressive, ‘everyone is against you four’ atmosphere.

“- DETAILS DETAILS anyway it’s happening I don’t really care, now about that special vote ~”

This -

This is literally DR1?!?!

This.... this is strange. There has to be incentive to vote one way or the other. Is she going to tie ‘vote for K1-b0’ and ‘you’ll be forced into a world where you can’t/shouldn’t exist’ together vs ‘Vote for Tsumugi′ and ‘stay inside forever’? That’s.... what happened in the others, right?

Shuichi, mentally clocked out but occasionally checking back in so he doesn’t miss anything important: Wow this is absolute bullshit

Yeah... there’s no way they weren’t going to find a way to tempt you to vote for K1-b0. Okay, lay it on us.

YOU’RE GOING TO MAKE THEM KEEP GOING?!?!

“Ugh why did I let myself get lured back into the conversation by my bitchin’ ‘Lazy Parallel World’ theme song I’m going to mentally check out again because everything hurts and I want to die -”

There.... there aren’t....??

THAT’S NOT ENCOURAGING omg I missed that catchphrase it always made me laugh

I??? I don’t know if I can trust that??? If you can literally make flashback lights to override their old memories - if you can force it on them, whether they’re willing or not - if you can delete the last 24 hours, you could make them do something again??? T-Though if Tsumugi is gone... but then again, there’s a whole team of people behind this apparently! Her being gone means nothing!

“So you cannot leave this place.” Is it? Is it literally, physically impossible to leave this place? That’s the real question. the impossible is possible all you gotta do is make it so... s o b

HOW EVIL CAN YOU GET

HOW COULD YOU NOT EVEN GIVE THEM A POSSIBILITY OF RETURNING TO THEIR ORIGINAL SELVES

WHY WOULD ANYONE MAKE SOMETHING LIKE THAT WHY WOULD THAT BE OKAY FOR A PUBLICLY TELEVISED TV SHOW

For that matter this whole damn series sounds like a snuff film, if actually people are involved. Dear lord, even if they are actually adults - and I desperately hope that if this is true, that the outside world is actually like this, and watches this for fun, then they have a ‘18+’ rule for auditions (actually considering the love hotel exists they must be at least 18 ggh) - even the survivors.... have been killed, in a sense. Their previous selves have been killed. They were dead the moment they entered the world...

So either 16 people consented to ‘dying’ in an existential sense as well as possibly a physical sense, or 16 people were kidnapped and ‘killed’ for the entertainment of the world. I.... I actually... do at least believe, no matter what, that there is a depraved audience viewing this from somewhere. There’s no way there isn’t - this feedback via comments, the scene with that kid Makoto watching this at the beginning of this chapter - those are true. And they were more than okay with the idea of these people dying for their entertainment, even the so-called winners.

You can only create new identities, not recover them... I, I dunno. Somehow that’s so much more soul-crushing than a lot of the other things that have come up this trial.

t-the way his voice is breaking skdlfjgh -

W HA T!?

WHAT THE FU -

WHY?! WHY?! WHY MUST IT ONLY BE TWO, EVERY TIME?! WHY HAVE YOU BEEN SO DETERMINED TO ONLY HAVE TWO PEOPLE SURVIVE TO THE END?!

H.... How the hell.... are they supposed to do that?! Is that how you’re doing it?! Putting the burden of the decision on them, in order to break them?!

H-HE LITERALLY SOUNDS LIKE HE’S GOING TO BREAK DOWN SOBBING ANY SECOND I CAN’T TAKE MUCH MORE OF THIS

She is really trying to push that point, huh... but there it is. They can escape to the ‘outside world’. That is a cold comfort at this point, but...

They...... I don’t. I don’t know. I wouldn’t be able to do this - look my classmates in the eyes and condemn them. I guess this somehow managed to be worse than DR1.

K1-B0 NO

fml of course the only potential option would be students choosing self-sacrifice

I... I’m glad Shuichi is showing concern. I’ve noticed it a few times, how finally in the last chapter or so that he’s been observant of K1-b0′s well-being where the others haven’t been.

But I’m getting distracted - that’s not the point! FML I know he’s been shown those extremist tendencies towards the vague ideal of hope and destroying the despair, I - between this and the ‘destroying the school’ rampage he went on - what is he aiming for? You’re saying that you’re trying to defeat despair, but what is that? Is hope just the opposite of despair? Is despair just whatever Tsumugi says it is, so we’re immediately opposed to it, as the representatives of hope? Are you fighting for them to escape? Why is everyone surviving together ‘living despairful lives’ if Tsumugi is gone and they aren’t trying to kill each other anymore? What makes it that way? Why is this considered ‘defeating despair’? What does that even mean?

I... I guess K1-b0 would be punished anyway if they voted for him, but.... still....

Ugh, I get it. I get that kibou is hope, and that K1-b0 is therefore hope, and that we’re fighting for him to win or... something.... uhghghgh

DON’T YOU FUCKING DARE SHUICHI

This was such an uncomfortable parade of ~ideal waifus~ sdlkfjsdf especially when we were getting into the ‘super tiny/cute’ territory because I have absolutely no interest in that whatsoever also I accidentally deleted Mahiru’s cameo sorry -

.... I wonder if this would’ve been more effective if I was the target audience for this? Either way, ending on Junko was still an offsetting choice, right? Right??

..........

Wait for that matter, who was this aimed for? Who out of Maki, Himiko or Shuichi would have fallen for that? Even if you believe that Maki or Himiko have an interest in women, nothing about the types they showed or may have shown interest in the game (Maki @  Kaito, Himiko @ Angie, Tenko and hell, even Kokichi) would lend them to the girls Tsumugi just cosplayed as? And even Shuichi’s strongest interest were in Kaede and Kaito - so who is Tsumugi trying to appeal to here?!

Oh shit we’re going into a mass panic debate! Okay, okay okay - !

.... Oh. Oh boy, I have to shoot down every mention of despair. Uh, okay -

OMFG I missed the screenshot but Monokuma started shilling their merch and their website I cannot even deal with how they’ll occasionally devolve into corporate shilling it’s so good -

But!!! We’ve got better things to do than get caught up in Monokuma’s commercializing of the class trial!

MAKI

NO MAKI WHY

ARE YOU TRYING TO MAKE UP FOR LAST CHAPTER IS THAT WHAT’S HAPPENING RIGHT NOW

omg

are you telling me

you’re not even doing this out of guilt

it

it’s spite

you’re doing this out of spite

you’re sacrificing yourself purely ou t of spite

MAKI HOW MANY TIMES ARE YOU GOING TO MAKE THE SAME MISTAKE

“FOR FUCK’S SAKE MAKI, AGAIN??? AGAIN?!?!?!”

“LET ME KILL SOMEONE SAIHARA IT’S MY DAMN TALENT FFS -”

DOES THIS SCREENSHOT SAY ‘SHUICHI LOOKS YUMMY <3′ YOU’RE RUINING THE MOMENT

okay I’m not going to feel right until I write down the new set of comments

Makiiii

my darling assassin T_T

Hope lives on!

Shuichi looks yummy <3

Well said!

Another hope loop?

Hope is contagious!

Two steps forward...

Don’t lose to despair!

Don’t tempt Maki’s fate...

That’s my Maki.

Hope must go on!

Maki, darling...

;_; I’m gonna cry...

Hope vs despair!

one vote for Keebo!

tfw you’re in despair

ALL OF THESE TEARS

Assassiiiiiiiin

I am living for these comments and I would have killed to see the comments for the Chapter 5 trial - hell, the Chapter 4 trial. that’s what let’s plays and YT comments are for I suppose -

tbh I think if that one that keeps lusting after Shuichi comes to help we’re going to need a restraining order

o

o-oh?!

AAAAAAH

NO DON’T

MAKE ME FIGHT HIM

MY ACTUAL SOUL BRO

is............... Is that -

Clair de Lune playing......?!