#I genuinely can’t fathom why you guys want that to have happened

[myfandomhalf]

Season Finale

Sick and tired of reading about people say that Dazai knowing about the plan beforehand somehow takes away from the genuineness of the skk moments

You mean you WANT Dazai to choose to kill Chuuya for the greater good and then not give a shit immediately after?? Ignoring the speech for a second, the reason he was able to be so carefree after “killing” Chuuya is because he KNEW Chuuya was gonna be okay.

First of all, Dazai knowing Chuuya wasn’t gonna die doesn’t take away from his speech. He replayed all those memories for himself, nobody else was seeing what was happening in his head. He was GENUINELY upset at the idea of losing Chuuya and having to put Chuuya through that, DESPITE knowing Chuuya would be okay. He was STILL upset. That’s way better than him thinking he just killed Chuuya, sparing him a thought, not even crying (bc no that wasn’t a tear) and then just moving on being silly as if nothing happened.

And then the other speech him saying that they’re destined to - do you seriously think he’d just make that up for shits and giggles? He was being serious. If he was gonna play it up for Fyodor’s sake he would’ve said the most emotional out of pocket line to ever be written, which to them would be related to him leaving Chuuya behind. But no he just said they’re destined to do something.

Dazai talks a lot about the past to Chuuya (Chuuya does not participate) but those two are clearly emotionally constipated bc they never have a conversation about what they mean to each other (which I think is bc Asagiri is not ready to reveal that yet). This was clearly Dazai taking his opportunity to say what he REALLY thinks / feels forcing Chuuya to listen without the commitment. Bc if anyone gets the ick later he can use the convenient excuse of “oh I didn’t mean that” which is bullshit.

And I do think an element of this idea that it’s worse that Dazai had everything planned comes from the misunderstanding that Dazai has completely changed since he was in the port mafia. Dazai just tends to make “better” (as in more objectively good) choices, but he very much still puts on a front. You guys do realize that his silly persona is just that right? A persona? He’s literally being fake every time he’s silly. That’s not his real personality. He’s a morally gray character. He never became a purely good person and he never will. It makes MUCH more sense that he planned everything out with Chuuya beforehand.

He met up with Akutagawa before getting arrested, he probably did the same with Chuuya.

And yes, this means he DID use and manipulate Sigma the entire time. Why wouldn’t he? Sigma has an ability Dazai needed. I’m sure Dazai planned for sigma to not die bc in his role as a detective it’s part of his job to mitigate losses of innocent lives, he knows this, but also bc Dazai needs to know what sigma learned. I genuinely hope there isn’t anyone out there thinking Dazai wouldn’t manipulate sigma bc he cares about him? He just met him. He has no personal investment in him. But he WILL make sure sigma is alive bc of the aforementioned reasons.

[gibberishfangirl]

Hello! I'd like to request Bofurin (and anyone else if you'd like) with reader who's very feminine

Pink dresses, bows everywhere, sunshine energy.. You get it

WIND BREAKER | dating the coquette girly

Synopsis ✰ head cannons of the boys dating a girly coquette sunshine girl who is aesthetically pleasing

Characters ✰ Haruka Sakura, Hajime Umemiya, Hayato Suo, Akihiko Nirei, Mitsuki Kiryu, Toma Higari, Jo Togame, Choji Tomiyama

Contains ✰ sfw! boys being mesmerized, cute content of them admiring your style

★ a/n <3 : I LOVE THIS. i love all my cute girly girls out there. i envisioned a coquette aesthetic/style when i first saw your request so i ran with it! hope you don’t mind and this is what you were also thinking <3 ★

Haruka Sakura ᡣ𐭩

𝜗𝜚 your style makes him more bashful

𝜗𝜚 he’s very protective over you

𝜗𝜚 fights off any creeps whose eyes linger on you for too long

𝜗𝜚 “stop staring, it’s creepy.”

𝜗𝜚 loves how nice, gentle, and optimistic you are

𝜗𝜚 you’re the only person he has photos of saved onto his phone

𝜗𝜚 blushes and stares at his phone for hours whenever you send him selfies

𝜗𝜚 “what are you looking at Sakura?” “nothing!”

𝜗𝜚 such a shy blushing mess whenever you happen to wear sundresses or short skirts

𝜗𝜚 on guard 24/7 wanting to make sure no one else is looking at you inappropriately

𝜗𝜚 his favorite season quickly becomes spring since it reminds him of you

𝜗𝜚 secretly loves whenever you take his phone and snap cute selfies of yourself (he constantly has a new wallpaper because of this)

𝜗𝜚 100% gets teased by his friends for having so many photos of you

Hajime Umemiya ᡣ𐭩

𝜗𝜚 matches your energy perfectlyy

𝜗𝜚 you two bounce off each other so well

𝜗𝜚 loves how cute you are

𝜗𝜚 literally plants flowers that remind him of you

𝜗𝜚 loves to take pics of you with his plants (hello?? pics of his favorite things on earth together? consider him obsessed)

𝜗𝜚 he’s obsessed with you

𝜗𝜚 loves to show all the cute photos he has of you to his friends

𝜗𝜚 bro is literally kicking his feet and giggling over you

𝜗𝜚 his mood instantly gets better with you around

𝜗𝜚 is even happier once he finds out you and Kotoha get along

𝜗𝜚 strongly convinced that he will marry you in the future

𝜗𝜚 tempted to propose now

𝜗𝜚 loves to watch you get ready and do cute hairstyles on yourself

𝜗𝜚 learns how to do ponytails so he can help you with your little half up half down pigtail hair-do’s (hopefully i made that make sense LOL sorry if i didn’t)

𝜗𝜚 you can practically see heart shapes in his eyes whenever he looks at you

Hayato Suo ᡣ𐭩

𝜗𝜚 fell in love at first sight

𝜗𝜚 he was star struck when he first saw you

𝜗𝜚 you’re literally his ideal type

𝜗𝜚 loves how pleasing you are to look at and be around

𝜗𝜚 has a hard time believing you’re real

𝜗𝜚 100000% will let you put bows in his hair

𝜗𝜚 keeps a close eye on you since he doesn’t want you to get bothered by anyone

𝜗𝜚 takes you on the cutest dates ever

𝜗𝜚 takes the cutest pics of you during your dates

𝜗𝜚 will ask you to send him selfies everyday

𝜗𝜚 his social media accounts are basically fan accounts of you

𝜗𝜚 sweetest couple alive

𝜗𝜚 your gentle energy matches well with his

𝜗𝜚 is slightly taken back by how genuine you are (in a good way)

𝜗𝜚 has the urge to protect you from the world

𝜗𝜚 constantly thinks about how lucky he was to cross paths with you and be your boyfriend

Akihiko Nirei ᡣ𐭩

𝜗𝜚 being the fashionista he is, he loves your outfits

𝜗𝜚 is in love with the aesthetic and totally gets the picture

𝜗𝜚 will help you plan out your outfits on facetime

𝜗𝜚 still can’t fathom why someone like you would choose someone like him

𝜗𝜚 feels lucky you to have you and never takes you for granted

𝜗𝜚 he always assumed someone as cute as you would go for a guy more like Suo or Kiryu, so he feels special that you wanted him

𝜗𝜚 loves to go shopping with you

𝜗𝜚 buys any cute item he sees because it reminds him of you

𝜗𝜚 expect him to gift you tons of things due to that

𝜗𝜚 “here i got you this because it made me think of you!” (CUTEST BOY)

𝜗𝜚 will always defend you if anyone says anything

𝜗𝜚 literally becomes your personal photographer

𝜗𝜚 you guys are such couple goals on social media

𝜗𝜚 blushes whenever you’re very caring towards him

𝜗𝜚 you help boost his confidence since you always have so many positive things to say about him

Mitsuki Kiryu ᡣ𐭩

𝜗𝜚 have you seen this man? he lovesss your style

𝜗𝜚 thinks you’re the most precious thing to ever exist

𝜗𝜚 he loves to hold your hand in public and show you off

𝜗𝜚 spends most of his day resting his cheek on his hand while admiring your cuteness

𝜗𝜚 will match with you if you ask

𝜗𝜚 will twirl you around so he can watch your cute dresses/skirts flow in the air

𝜗𝜚 brags about how cute his girlfriend is to others

𝜗𝜚 compliments you whenever he has the chance

𝜗𝜚 takes so many pictures of you

𝜗𝜚 his phone screen is definitely a photo of you dressed up all cute in a field of flowers

𝜗𝜚 loves to fix up the bows in your hair

𝜗𝜚 won’t mind if you ever ask to put a bow on him

𝜗𝜚 both you share love for the color pink

𝜗𝜚 loves it when you sit on his lap during hang outs so everyone knows your his

𝜗𝜚 of course no one is surprised to find out how adorable Kiryu’s girlfriend is

Toma Higari ᡣ𐭩

𝜗𝜚 he’s very shy about how polar opposites you two look

𝜗𝜚 no one really saw you two coming

𝜗𝜚 you’re like a breath of fresh air to him

𝜗𝜚 loves how peaceful you are in comparison to his chaotic lifestyle

𝜗𝜚 you live in bliss as your boyfriend practically scares off anyone from messing with you

𝜗𝜚 feels refreshed being around you

𝜗𝜚 seriously you’re like a glass of cool water on a hot day to him that’s how much you affect him

𝜗𝜚 loves how caring you are about him and those around you

𝜗𝜚 your hopeful attitude rubs off on him after hanging out with you consistently

𝜗𝜚 definitely has a problem with anyone who makes any weird or sly comments about you or your relationship with him

𝜗𝜚 has no problem defending you in any case

𝜗𝜚 gets very flustered by your wardrobe choices at times

𝜗𝜚 might want you to change sometimes if your skirt is too short

𝜗𝜚 will consider beating up any guy who looks at you

Jo Togame ᡣ𐭩

𝜗𝜚 he’s a sly dog

𝜗𝜚 100% checks you out when you’re not looking (hell, he’s doing that even if you’re looking)

𝜗𝜚 loves how dainty and delicate you look in comparison to him

𝜗𝜚 he’s all over you 24/7 even if it’s just casually hugging you from behind

𝜗𝜚 definitely makes sure everyone knows your his girl

𝜗𝜚 very protective over you

𝜗𝜚 won’t be afraid to check anyone if they’re being inappropriate towards you

𝜗𝜚 finds you very sweet for being so nice to him and being very considerate of him

𝜗𝜚 ruins your outfits by making you wear his jacket over them

𝜗𝜚 he thinks his jacket makes you look cuter with the way it swallows you

𝜗𝜚 makes you wear his jacket because it shows to others you’re his and it makes people back off

𝜗𝜚 encourages your clothing choices

𝜗𝜚 “wear whatever you want, i can fight.” (HEAVY ON THIS ENERGY)

Choji Tomiyama ᡣ𐭩

𝜗𝜚 has the same “wear whatever you want, i can fight.” energy

𝜗𝜚 be careful, he will literally beat anyone into a pulp if they look at you funny, talk about you vulgarly, hits on you, etc. all he needs is just one reason

𝜗𝜚 he doesn’t really understand fashion but thinks you’re beautiful

𝜗𝜚 loves how confident you are and how you know exactly who you are

𝜗𝜚 admires how much effort you put into getting ready

𝜗𝜚 always wants to take you out to lunch, dinner, the movies, anywhere he can just so he can see what new cute outfits you can come up with

𝜗𝜚 compliments you 24/7

𝜗𝜚 will ask you to put your hair accessories on him

𝜗𝜚 definitely the dresses up gf and dresses down bf couple

𝜗𝜚 he actually likes how much you stick out when you’re next to him

𝜗𝜚 always wants to suffocate you in hugs after he sees how adorable you look that day

𝜗𝜚 two peas in a pod

𝜗𝜚 you both radiate the same energy at times

𝜗𝜚 you help him stay at a happy place, if he ever feels himself feeling sad again you’re always there to grab his hand and pull him right out <3

[mal3vol3nt]

I think ZKs really exaggerated Zuko and Katara’s relationship, and this is coming from a guy who actually really likes Zuko and Katara’s relationship, just not a ship (it’s not as toxic as some say, by the end of the show at least).

Isaw this one post about how Zuko and Katara have the most intimate relationship of The Gaang. How he’s the only one who supports her, understands her and validates her anger. Whereas Zuko is the only one Katara doesn’t have to look after, the only one she can depend on emotionally, the only one who she’s sees as an equal and matches her maturity.

I question this, because when did we see this in the show? Besides like 3 instances. ZKs act like Katara was never supported by Aang (or the others). I’m sure that everything they say Zuko does for Katara, Aang does for her and more. Everything Katara supposedly has in Zuko, she already has in Aang. I could list all of this, but this is already running long as it is.

What do you think?

This the full post: https://www.tumblr.com/theotterpenguin/738115696097116160/thinking-about-how-katara-is-the-only-person-zuko?source=share

not only are they exaggerating the depth of katara and zuko’s relationship, but they’re underplaying the depth of her relationship with literally everyone else. like they undermine how much all her friends mean to her by saying the guy she was on good terms with for like 4 episodes immediately became her closest companion and confidant

the only time we see zuko offer her support of any kind is during the southern raiders episode where he’s encouraging her to go kill the guy who murdered her mother. and he’s not doing it because he genuinely wants to be a supportive figure for her, but because he thinks this is what’ll get her to finally forgive him and stop treating him so coldly. and then the episode ends with him admitting that he was wrong in terms of what she needed—not violent revenge but the chance to let her anger out without compromising her morals in blind rage. other than that, we don’t see him act as a shoulder for her to lean on, and the one instance we do see him act that way, he’s bad at it and ends up realizing there are ways other than violence to move on from internalized anger

and sure you can argue that zuko still gave her the chance to confront yon rha even if she chose not to kill him like he encouraged her to, and that inandof itself is an act of emotional support, but the reality is he did that to get on her good side rather than to be a genuine friend. had she already been friendly to him, would he have ever brought up that he knows who killed kya? would he have even asked sokka about the day their mom died to get that information? in the show he only does this because he can’t fathom why katara is still mad at him when everyone else has already forgiven him. he wanted to speed up her process of forgiving him, so had she already forgiven him and they were friends, i doubt the whole “i can help you avenge your mother” convo would have ever happened because it wouldn’t have served him to do so. and in my opinion, any support that has ulterior motives and an end goal isn’t genuine support

but compare this to aang and sokka. we see these two go out of their way for her countless times throughout the three books, which makes sense considering the three of them are the ogs and went through everything together (incoming really long list lmao)

aang offers to take katara to the northern water tribe so she can learn waterbending under a master after knowing her for only a few hours at most. he also does this after she expresses her upset at being the only southern waterbender left. “katara! we’re going to find you a master!”

aang gives himself over to zuko and his fire nation crew to save katara and sokka’s village

aang completes all of bumi’s challenges to save katara and sokka

aang credits katara for haru’s sudden bravery in saving that old man. “wow you must have really inspired him”

aang and sokka willingly (and eagerly) participate in her plan to get arrested for earthbending

sokka comes up with the plan to get coal to the earthbenders so they can find motivation again, something that katara is very passionate about, thus showing his support in her goal

aang and sokka help fight the fire nation guards that are keeping the earthbenders prisoner, aiding in katara’s goal of helping them help themselves

aang weaves katara a brand new necklace after she had her mother’s stolen. this makes her smile

aang is quick to reassure katara when she begins to show signs of self-doubt at aang’s natural waterbending talent. “well you had to learn all on your own. i’m lucky enough to have a great teacher”

aang refers to katara as a waterbender, something that clearly means so much to her after she spent the whole episode insecure of her abilities

sokka steals the waterbending scroll for katara and aang to learn from

aang travels alone in search of medicine for katara and sokka, all while an entire nation is hunting him down with the intent to torture him to the brink of death, thus risking his life for their safety

sokka tackles aang after hearing katara’s cries of pain when he accidentally burns her. despite knowing and caring for aang, sokka can’t stand the thought of someone hurting katara even if unintentionally, especially with fire

aang explicitly states he will never firebend again after accidentally hurting her. he too can’t stand the thought of her in pain and hates that he was the one who hurt her (this is also him taking ownership of his mistake and punishing himself—for those of you who think he is never held accountable for his mistakes)

aang refuses to learn under pakku when he rejects katara and only lets up when katara tells him he needs to take this chance to learn waterbending

sokka is the one to suggest that aang teach katara everything pakku is teaching him, and aang loves this idea

aang cheers for her when she fights pakku. “go katara!”

the general is only able to trigger aang into the avatar state after he is made to believe that katara was buried alive, showcasing once again how much he cares about her safety

aang pushes katara out of the way of falling rocks when the aftermath of appa getting burned causes the tunnel to cave in

aang refers to katara as ‘sifu’ after she made an offhand comment about him never calling her that. this makes her smile

aang turns away from cosmic power immediately after he sees a vision of katara in danger

aang lets her go so he can unlock all his chakras and save katara from impending doom against azula, zuko, and the dai li

aang eagerly participates in katara’s plan to perform ecoterrorism and calls her a hero

aang also eagerly participates in helping her scare off the fire nation general as the painted lady. sokka participates as well because “i would never turn my back on you”

sokka has a talk with toph after she blows up at katara for her motherly-attitude (and while i definitely have issues with this episode i still think it’s important that sokka sought out this conversation to sorta defend his sister and help toph see where katara is coming from)

aang and sokka hug and comfort her when she breaks down crying after becoming a bloodbender

after knowing her for so long (his whole life in sokka’s case—he’s her fucking brother) and witnessing the kind of reaction she had to bloodbending, aang and sokka both tried talking her down from killing a man. this is a 14-year-old girl in pain. the same 14-year-old girl who put her life and freedom at risk to save earthbenders from their metal prison and sobbed when she was forced to bloodbend to save her best friend from dying again and delayed their group’s traveling to relieve a fire nation village from fire nation pollution and control, was now demanding to kill a man in cold blood. aang and sokka were supporting her full on during this episode because they knew, more than fucking anyone, that killing yon rha would only hurt her once she came down from her blind rage. and to add even more proof of their unwavering trust in her to always do the right thing not just for others but for herself, aang allowed her to take appa to confront the man. appa, aang’s lifelong companion and animal guide, his only living reminder of his culture and pacifistic people, and who aang had suffered a painful separation from. aang trusted her with appa to go on this mission. because he trusts and supports her

———

now onto the claim that zuko is more mature than everyone else and therefore matches her in maturity. i just bust out laughing LMAO

for starters, let’s not act like katara is the epitome of maturity. yea, she’s the mom friend, but she’s still a kid and acts like one. yall just refuse to acknowledge the moments where she makes mistakes as her acting her age and being human. instead yall hold these mistakes over her more aggressively than the other characters or yall pretend they don’t exist in favor of idealizing her so she fits into your “she’s so mature and is a mother figure to everyone” role (her telling sokka “then you didn’t love her like i did”, blowing up at aang for picking up waterbending so quickly, antagonizing toph out of pettiness by making fun of her blindness—“too bad you can’t see them toph!”, etc.)

zuko is a whole other story lol. that boy wouldn’t know maturity if it hit him in the face, and when you compare his behavior to other characters in the gaang it becomes all the more obvious (incoming another—shorter—list)

aang when presented with his mistake in “bato of the water tribe” -> he accepts the consequences—katara and sokka leaving him—and admits he was wrong. he doesn’t blame anyone else nor does he beg for forgiveness or try convincing katara and sokka to stay. he accepts he was wrong and lets himself sit with the consequences of his actions. from then on, we never see aang selfishly hide information from his friends again

katara when presented with her mistake in “the waterbending scroll” after yelling at aang -> she apologizes immediately and punishes herself by handing the scroll over to him, claiming she wants nothing to do with it. she recognizes the mistake and quickly accepts a self-punishment to regulate her own behavior

sokka when presented with the issues of his sexism -> he gets on his knees in front of suki and respectfully asks that she train him, using the word ‘honor’ to communicate his sincerity. he admits his faults to her at the end of the episode and his behavior is different from then on. he reflects on a part of himself, deems that he needs to change, and then makes those changes without having to be forced into doing so or guided repeatedly into making the right choices along the way. he arrives there by himself after being presented with evidence that proves his original way of thinking wrong

now compare that with zuko’s journey of unlearning his prejudiced ways

when he is shown extreme kindness by song and her mother, he repays them by stealing from them

after having been on a good-streak while living in the earth kingdom, zuko sides with azula the moment his integrity is put to the test in front of the avatar, betraying his uncle in favor of “his honor”

when iroh stops talking to him, zuko screams at him and places blame on iroh for this change in their relationship

when mai is seen talking to another guy, zuko storms over and throws that guy across a room. she, understandably, breaks up with him

when katara gives him the cold shoulder, zuko demands “what’s your problem?!”, asking how it can be that she still hates him but everyone else has forgiven him, as if he hasn’t given her—and everyone else—plenty of reason to be distrustful of him for lifetimes to come

when aang is goofing off instead of training, zuko—instead of communicating—attacks him with blasts of fire, forcing aang to retaliate

the only reason why zuko is given this extreme maturity label is because his worldview was challenged and changed. whereas the other characters in the gaang already had correct worldviews and didn’t have to go through a series-long redemption arc to become good people. they were already good people, so their mistakes and shortcomings are held to higher standards than zuko’s because his are viewed as stepping stones to a pending redemption. never mind all the times in which he backtracked and hurt more people. those times were all “necessary” for his redemption to happen and be well-done. yall can excuse all of zuko’s flawed behavior by saying “but he was redeemed! that wasn’t really his true self!” and all that bullshit, so everything he does that’s good post-redemption gives yall this delusion that he was always this good person who is capable of making mature decisions (never mind the fact that he is still incredibly immature post-redemption and still has a long way to go in terms of unlearning his prejudices by the time the show ends)

in conclusion, yall have a weird obsession with isolating katara from all her relationships with the other characters in favor of making her zuko’s one and only, and yall have deluded yourselves into thinking either one of them are incredibly mature

that’s all i gotta say ✌️

[hinalatte]

(Not so)Quick thoughts on Episode 13

I have a lot of things to say about the new episode (about Levi especially) and a little Hu analysis I can write now that her secret is confirmed, but it’s very late! But I still want to talk about things! So here’s a random collection of stuff I thought was interesting.

Spoilers under the cut!

Eden was the one who took out Xander’s eye with a fork. It’s interesting that she’s the weakest member of the cast, but somehow managed to injure Xander, the strongest by far. He must’ve been really caught off guard.

It’s also interesting that the weapon is a fork. It must’ve been a spur of the moment decision, otherwise she would’ve had a better weapon. Her distraught expression also implies she wasn’t planning on hurting Xander.

In the opening scene of the show, someone (likely Xander) says he has to kill Teruko. He says he “didn’t expect her to attack him like that”, which we now know is referring to Eden. But he also says he made a mistake to trust “them”. So Eden was working with someone else. She might’ve betrayed Xander on Teruko’s behalf.

Also, this scene emphasizes that Xander’s goal was to end the killing game! A goal which he never saw through, but David is trying to carry that torch for him.

This one isn’t related to the new episode, but I found this and it made me feel things. Eden says almost the same thing to Teruko in chapter 1 that Arei says to Eden in chapter 2.

I’ve been trying since last week to figure out what David knew about Xander. Their interactions in chapter 1 provide no clues, as far as I can tell…David doesn’t act like he recognizes Xander at all, except in their “role models” scene where he has this line. They did investigate together at the start, so maybe something happened then? Or maybe David was just determined to not let Xander know he recognized him. Or maybe David didn’t care much about Xander Matthews as a public figure before he got to know Xander as a person, and only started considering Xander’s career important after the fact. Or maybe he genuinely didn’t recognize him because he didn’t mention his last name? But in the MV, he remembers what Xander looks like without his eye patch, so wouldn’t that mean David knew what he looked like?

When Teruko claims to have the family secret, he makes a face like “I caught you”. Why did he react like that if he already knew what her secret was…? Does David know from his prior knowledge of Xander that the family secret is his?

It’s possible Teruko genuinely believes the family secret is hers, since she blames her own bad luck for the things that happen to people around her.

Eden can’t fathom the idea of not caring about people. She’s so empathetic it almost seems like a weakness, so she doesn’t understand how someone could lack empathy completely. I love that dynamic…I hope they both live so I can see more of it.

Arturo has a strong reaction to this because he still remembers Felicity.

Also, Arturo being a voice of morality this episode was something I did not expect, but I’m here for it.

Ace is absolutely lying. He’s the most gullible person in the cast. He definitely thought Levi was being genuine.

He pushed Levi away over and over in chapter 2, but Levi kept bouncing back from it, insisting he wouldn’t hurt him. That probably made Ace feel comforted, in a way. Like there was one person who wouldn’t abandon him, even after enduring all of his awful behavior.

It’s interesting that he brings up the term “friends” here. Since when were they friends? Genuinely. A guy expressing concern for you does not a friendship make, Ace Markey.

He’s also taking Levi very out of context. Levi says he doesn’t care about anyone at all, because he’s literally incapable of it. Ace takes that as a personal attack. Levi doesn’t care about him, specifically, and that’s a betrayal somehow. Levi never meant to mislead him about that, but Ace thinks he was lying to him. (It’s made worse for him because now he knows no one in the cast likes him)

Ace projects a lot of things onto people in general. Mostly negative intent. But in this case, he might’ve been projecting the idea of a friendship that wasn’t really there. It makes sense to a degree. I was also fooled into thinking Levi cared about Ace, but not because they were friends. It was because Levi like helping everyone, including Ace. Ace seems incapable of understanding that sometimes people do stuff and it doesn’t really mean anything.

I say all that as an Ace Markey fan. He’s my favorite character. This critique is from a place of love. Boy, is there a lot to critique about him.

I’m interested now in seeing how his relationships develop after this. His most important dynamics (Levi and Nico) either don’t care about him at all or hate him so much they tried to kill him (unless there’s a plot twist on that front). Is he ever going to have a friend? Or a confidant of any kind? Not if he keeps acting like that, but it’s kind of a vicious cycle.

Also did his friend die? Why does he say “his memory”? Okay Ace. Is this why his sexuality was confirmed?

Last observation for the road. Whit called David “Starboy” in chapter 1, and now “Sir Light Pollution” in chapter 2, continuing the trend of star-themed David nicknames. It makes sense in his head. (Why does he know so much about hanging)

[cartoonrival]

I've been on T for 3 years, and I've been indecisive all my life. I went in a whole lot of circles for months trying to make up my mind about whether I wanted to or not.

The process I went through was basically: I came out around Nov. 2020. thought that I would probably eventually want to start T based on watching other people's progress videos and started doing research about the effects. saw a therapist to try and be sure starting T was the right thing for me (therapist ended up being really shitty and thought that going on T would make me binary + not asexual, spoiler alert it did not). put it off another 5-6 months longer than I had intended to be sure shitty therapist wasn't influencing my decision. made up my mind not to start, because I was sure my extended family would cut me off. My thought process at the time was like, if could just be stuck on a desert island I would do it, if I could just live in isolation forever, then I would do it, but I couldn't handle the idea of explaining to anybody why I needed to. started breaking down crying a couple times a week at the idea of never getting to go on T. met a guy at a party who had just started T and I was so consumed with envy that I couldn't think about anything else the entire time. made an appointment with my informed consent clinic 1 month out to make sure I was sure, and then told my parents. They freaked out a little because they were convinced that going on T would make me bald and also dead (neither of those things has happened yet), and then they got over it, and the rest of my family ended up being fine. Finally started T in May 2021. One minor health issue since then (too many red blood cells), but zero regrets.

Sorry this is long. I think probably a lot of the indecision I went through might have been unnecessary, but the process of sorting through my own doubts about it was still really important. I don't know the situation you're in, but for me the most important thing to figure out was whether I was avoiding doing it because I didn't want the effects, or because I was worried about what other people would think. Also idk if i can include links but check out this piece by Daniel Lavery, it just perfectly captures the kind of justifications I was running through trying to talk myself out of starting https://thenewinquiry.com/the-stages-of-not-going-on-t/ I think indecision must be incredibly common and normal, if not universal.

thank you very much for this. i think i personally have a very hard time imagining myself in situations i’m not in or in a hypothetical future so like. i have no fucking idea what i would do if i started growing facial hair. there is genuinely no way for me to know if i want facial hair until i see myself irl with facial hair, for example. that’s i think where the core of my indecision comes from is i’m so wildly guessing about a future that does not exist yet and i cannot fathom what it would be like until i’m there. a lot of my transition has been like that but this is obviously the most significant decision i’ve confronted so far so the fact that i cant visualize it stresses me out more than usual. so like asking myself hypothetical questions doesn’t work because i truly don’t know, beyond the fact that i want a deeper voice. but what if i dont!!!!!! but at THAT point i’m definitely in the deserted island scenario where if i wasn’t around other people i would want it deeper. and that’s really the only outwardly obvious change that’s also permanent. so maybe i shouldn’t die wondering. cuz i was daydreaming abt it constantly for months then the day came to start and i got so scared suddenly and now for the past month it’s been causing me endless grief abt this thing that i want to do but also don’t want to do. but i can’t figure out what the reason for not wanting to is. if it’s fear or not wanting to. i’m rambling! thank you for answering <3

[doodle-list]

I'm genuinely So sad about the path Mando is taking like. I enjoyed some moments of course, but the way they're completely taking the spot light from Din's and Grogu's relationship (which is the literal premise of the show and what got me into it in the first place) to focus on another character we had little to no connection with in the previous seasons, and also make her completely let go of her past goals for what? To become an ambassador of something she wasn't even apart of??? Also completely ignoring her past and turning her into this shallow innocent princess. Sorry for the rant, I'm just really sad about the new season

No dont be! You’re so valid for that and I agree completely :/

A lot of people have already put it into words better but season 3 baring all shitty writing just doesnt feel like The Mandalorian anymore

The main part of the show of din and grogus relationship is just not there anymore, and the fact that we spent two seasons building up these really lovable characters that had so much more potential and places to go and just dulled them into a purely merchandising object and a cardboard cutout yes man is so disappointing

I got into the mandalorian for the characters because I love character driven stories. I can’t care less about bigger plots on their own and the new season being this wide galaxy thing insgead of a funky show where we get to see this guy politely fail to decline every side quest ever and try and take care of his son, I just. Dont care anymore

Like nothing about season 3 feels character focused. Sure bo katan is There but all her flaws and faults that make her an interesting character get brushed under the rug and completely ignored in favor of propping her up to be this sympathetic hero, even though we canonically have evidence of the complete opposite. There is no attempt to even give her character development so when she gets the sabre handed to her Again, the expectation that her rule is going to work this time is just poor writing

Its basically that phrase “the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results”

I just feel like the writers this season somehow are completely unaware of their characters and how they would act in situations. It feels like they created the plot first are forcing the characters to complete their checklist of wants with complete disregard of whether it makes sense for them to do it at all

Season 2 gave us really wholesome moments between Din and Grogu and I dont think I’m wrong for saying that we all expected the latter to increase as seasons and episodes went by

They clearly understand that we all love Din since they baited us in the promotional material so I literally cannot fathom why they decided to nix the direction they were going to for practically a completely different story

The story of a man who’s trying to find his place in the world and learns to become a father is just not there anymore. And that just… sucks

And well, this probably sounds really nit picky to some or like “why are you so focused on this shlt just enjoy the show and have fun” but when you love the show for two reasons only (din and din and grogus relationship) its very very hard to like something that has so blatantly carelessly pushed that aspect aside. And when you’re not interested in whats happening because the reason you love the show isnt treated well, you kinda start to see all the flaws behind the curtains

[thefanciestborrower]

heya! so i saw your tang post from a bit ago and i was wondering if you have any hcs for everyone's favorite noodle nerd? thanks if you answer! (i love your art and writing btw it's the reason i come on tumblr)

Hi fellow Tang enjoyer!! I would be, more than happy to provide you with hcs because ima be honest I have the single biggest prey crush on him ever lmao. He’s just so!!!! Eatable!!!!

Also dude the fact that I’m the reason you came to tumblr is baffling like...I’m so so so so flattered you enjoy my content that much gosh! I remember the people I came to tumblr for and I honestly can’t fathom myself being that for someone else gosh 💕. Always open for asks or just chatting in general please I love making friends here. 

Anyways, on to the headcannons!

Tang is genuinely like, 99.9% prey because I mean just look at him 

Now that’s not to say he’d like being eaten really 

But. It happens 

He’s just very appetizing to MK’s more non-human friends who hang around the shop sometimes like Red Son

In the show Mei joked about him looking so sweet and that’s why he keeps nearly getting eaten, but I genuinely see him tasting way more savory than sweet 

He’s has this very salty savory kind of almost beef miso taste to him and it’s delicious 

Means he pairs incredibly well with Pigsy’s noodles 

And, because it’s Tang, you know he’s not gonna pass up a chance to hang out in a giant bowl of noodles no sir 

He’s gonna happily sit in there and eat his weight in soup 

And then probably pass out and take a nap in said soup 

One fun little thing I can see happening is Pigsy making a noodle dish specifically to pair with Tang’s flavor 

Not for eating, but more as a fun work of art and gift for Tang

Tang loves lounging as a fancy garnish it strokes his ego a bit and gives him all the food he could possibly want 

It’s a bit of a risky thing to do though cause MK will eat said soup

Though he’s nice enough to eat around Tang

Just gives him a little lick 

The times in which Tang does get eaten he’s loud 

So so so loud and whiny 

It’s gross and slimy and smells weird inside!

Doesn’t like it nope 

But that won’t keep him from getting eaten no sir 

He’s a little soft around the middle and isn’t incredibly strong so he goes down very easy 

And makes a great oral stim, provided you can ignore the yelling 

Wukong likes chewing on him cause it’s funny 

Now sometimes he can be a little more willing, and that’s pretty much either when he’s eaten by Mk or eaten with Mk

MK is a sweet guy who will let him out when asked so he doesn’t mind spending an hour or two inside

Sometimes Mei will eat him along with MK and shhhh don’t tell but that’s when he might get a little cuddly 

He’ll let MK sleep on him and honestly be super content with everything provided Mei isn’t too loud 

I have so many more thoughts lol but we stopping here for today 

[antvnger]

Soooooooo since I was only around in the movie for like 30 minutes or so, I missed loads of like actual important information that would’ve been nice to know beforehand.

The short answer rant is this: What. A. Shit show.

Like…like hell, I don’t even know where to start with all of this. It gave me a headache.

Brace yourselves, gang, I’m not holding back.

First of all, apparently sitting down and having an actual conversation about the Accords was a little too much to do for them? Like they started to but nothing came out of it. A stand still. I would think something that big would make them sort through it all until they came to some kind of collective agreement, but I guess not? 🤷🏻‍♂️

Secondly, both sides made mistakes. Big time. Both thought they were doing right, and I definitely get that, but both sides could’ve done better at what they were doing. I guess retrospect’s 20/20 but yeah.

Also, I really can’t stand Ross. Not the clean shaven Ross but the one with the mustache and the high and mighty, sourpuss attitude. Like what a creep.

The real bad guys here? The government.

How the hell did the Avengers just learn about the Accords 3 days before they’re supposed to be ratified? Shouldn’t that have been like breaking news from the moment somebody breathed about it?

And Ross being like “you’ll retire” if the Avengers decide to go against the Accords? As if he could actually do anything about it. I mean, who the hell does this guy think he is? Thanos?

Also what is it with baseball caps and sunglasses as disguises? I know I pulled the same stunt but it wasn’t my idea. I said no and got outvoted.

And look, I think Wanda’s great, but she wasn’t a kid at the time this all went down. I appreciate Cap wanting to protect her since she was like the newbie, but she messed up. That was really bad. I don’t know what she could’ve done to fix it, but maybe at the very least the Avengers could have issued a public apology.

I think Steve has serious Bucky issues and I genuinely don’t understand.

And Vision saying the whole world started having more enhanced since/because Tony said he’s Iron Man is bullshit. Last I checked, and Ant Mun backed me up here, all the big bads that have shown up in our world happened because of things NOT related to Tony! What, just because they called the move Captain America Civil War, they’re gonna make Tony the bad guy or something? Bullshit.

ALSO! When T’Challa was fighting Bucky and the UN chopper just started shooting at them both, thank goodness T’Challa was wearing Vibranium or that would have caused a plethora of other problems. Funny how the Avengers get fingers pointed at them over collateral damage for the sake of the mission when that chopper was literally doing THE SAME THING.

WHY DIDNT STEVE JUST EXPLAIN TO TONY TEN MINUTES INTO THE MOVIE THAT BUCKY WASNT BUCKY AND HAD NO CONTROL WHEN THE WINTER SOLDIER SHIT HAPPENED?!

Oh don’t worry. I’m getting to Siberia, hold your horses.

I’m not really sure on the timeframe here, but I’m think the Accords weren’t actually ratified yet when the whole airport fight happened soooooooo I don’t think Creepy Ross had any real power yet to tell Tony what to do.

I’m not going to touch on the lady who lost her son because I can’t even fathom that kind of grief. And I don’t want to. Ever. And I know grief makes you do things so I don’t know. My heart just hurts for her. I hate Tony got the brunt of that but still.

Speaking of grief making you do things? Zemo. I know who he is now, and I really can’t stand the guy. I hate he lost loved ones, and I hurt for him in that department. But when he decided to go all batshit psycho over it, some sympathy’s lost. Like he went through some hella trouble to make the Avengers unravel.

Siberia…*sigh* Siberia was really hard to watch. Like it was painful. It was…frightening. I almost wish I didn’t watch it. I had an idea what was going to happen because of what Tony shared but to see it for myself…

*sigh* This whole movie is a testament to honesty, trust, and open communication. Or rather what could happen with a lack there of. Ya know, me hearing about the Avengers before I joined them and seeing them on tv for interviews and stuff, I thought they were tight. An actual, close knit team. Maybe a found-family. But sooooooo much could’ve been avoided if they had just acted like that.

If they’d just sat down and talked it over. They could have an arguing match over it all if necessary, hell friends and families do that. If they had really trusted each other and let each other in on things instead of keeping each other out and building up secrets and agendas. Too many bosses and not enough coworkers.

It hurt, Iron Mun. It hurt to watch. Those are my friends and…there were times it felt like I didn’t even recognize them.

And then watching me show up felt so surreal. They got that whole interaction with the rest of “Team Cap” down to a T. I remember being so excited to be called up by one of the OG Avengers, one of my heroes, feeling honored and ready to do more and help people and do what’s right. Make a bigger difference than I already was. But God, I had no idea. I had no fricking clue.

In the end, Civil War was just like any other war. A mess. Both sides made mistakes, everything could’ve been done better, and nobody came out unscathed. In fact, everything ended up worse because of it.

@stxrksarc

[vigilskeep]

I'm so happy youre having a good time, but I can't fathom supporting Loghain after what he's done. I get that he had his reasons, and I'm sure they were valid, but I love Alistair too much, I don't think I could do it.

oh yeah, i mean, i want to say, this is not me being a loghain is right truther or anything. that old man sucks fundamentally and did genuinely terrible things! (he also had reasons to think the way that he did. both of those things can be true.) for me, i don’t really ever personally hate fictional characters unless they’re badly written. i just happen to not be built that way; i’m always just kind of aware that’s a made-up guy who did made-up things and i can’t take it that seriously. so i’m less interested in um getting the “right” conclusion to the story where characters i approve of get good endings and the characters i disagree with bad endings, than in making them play out a fun story.

i think it’s stellar writing that you can put your true kind-hearted friend to a test of his loyalties that he won’t pass because he wants a man dead. i think loghain is an extremely interesting character to spend more time with and give a greater role in the narrative. i love to explore the morality of the grey wardens and their willingness to recruit anyone if it gets the job done. i want to play around with all of those ideas. also i care about making a divisive character who feels real and who makes choices as strong as any npc. i don’t really care whether or not i would spare loghain, but i do care if minerva would and why

i’m going on and on here but what i’m trying somewhat awkwardly to explain is that this is how i play the game because of what personally interests me but not wanting to do it for your reasons is another perfectly good way to play the game! i adore alistair too and i love to see content from people who romanced and lived happily ever after with him or were best friends. on the same level, i’m not strong enough to take the landsmeet options to have alistair killed or exiled, but i’d still be interested in what people do with that in their playthroughs. spiritually we are all doing parallel play here

[foxstens]

once again having an existential crisis about sexual/romantic attraction

there’s a lot to talk about but rn im kind of questioning the crushes ive had. i’ve explained them before, one was in kindergarten and i rmr nothing about it, one was sometime in high school and lasted like 2 seconds, there really wasn’t much to it, and one has been going on since 5th grade. but now im suddenly wondering if they were even actually what we understand as crushes

google says a crush is ‘a brief but intense infatuation for someone‘ which kinda fits sorta maybe, but people on reddit explain it in a very... romantic way i guess, according to them you want to be around that person, you want to be liked by them, you have an active desire to date them or to just take things further. and im. well. that does not fit. i mean it might have with 2/3 crushes since i don’t remember the actual feeling itself

but with the third crush i do remember the feeling because it never fucking disappeared. like i’ve known this guy since i was 10, the last time i saw him face to face was like 4 years ago, but i still have him on facebook, we still wish each other happy birthday every year, and he still regularly appears in my dreams. and i always get the same feeling in those dreams - the feeling of being curious about this person, of wanting to talk to him and spend time with him and his family because when i met them in the past they always had interesting things to say and they were always nice and warm and friendly and as an only child maybe i was a bit jealous of his close relationship with his sisters.

and. that’s it. that’s all it’s ever been. maybe that feeling was friendship or at least a desire for friendship because i’ve never actually had irl friends and what i just described does not fucking look like what we think of when we use the word ‘crush’. 

why am i so hung up on this, you ask? because i identify with the word aromantic so strongly, it feels more right than my actual fucking name but. i can’t be aromantic if i’ve had three whole crushes, right. lol. im probably just being stupid, but thinking about all of this is interesting. 

and i still don’t understand the concept of romantic or sexual attraction. i guess i can sort of fathom the idea of romantic attraction, like you look at someone and you get the feeling that you want to be more than their friend, though it still feels foreign to me, definitely not something i’ve experienced, let alone with a stranger

but the idea of sexual attraction feels positively alien. maybe people just suck at explaining it or something, but having an actual physical response to just seeing someone, and having sexual thoughts and desires when looking at a person??? i’m sorry but what. does this genuinely actually happen to real people in real life

when i see an attractive person my brain just kind of stops and i just stare and mumble if i have to speak, then i might think about their face for a bit afterwards, trying to recall what i liked about it, and that’s it. very rarely, i might find someone’s aura and confidence attractive, and that’s when i’ll really stare but even then my thoughts are just: i wonder what their life is like, i wonder what it’s like to be them, i wonder what it’s like to be around them regularly when they have this aura. you know??? i guess this might be what google describes as aesthetic attraction, maybe.

so yea i guess this proves that i’m definitely somewhere on the aroace spectrum. i mean i knew this, i have known this for years. but i feel more confident about it, now that i’ve thought more deeply about the ‘crushes’ i’ve had and how they fit.

also hopefully one day i’m not gonna be so surprised when i get reminded that some people see and experience the world completely differently. d a n g.

[omegaling]

Headcanons: If Jonathan and Eddie Were Friends (no Upside Down)

Jonathan doesn’t have much of an opinion of Eddie throughout most of high school. He knows that rumors about Eddie “the Freak” Munson are bullshit, and it’s not like he doesn’t like the guy, it’s just that Eddie is… a lot. Loud, chaotic, antagonistic, confrontational: pretty much everything Jonathan isn’t. Jonathan personally can’t fathom why it would take anyone three attempts to graduate, but Eddie’s never done anything to bother him so it’s really none of his business.

Eddie knows a guy named “Jonathan Byers” exists and that they probably had some classes together but that’s the extent of his knowledge of the guy.

During the first few weeks of high school a smart-mouthed sophomore bully corners Will and calls him a homophobic slur, only to find themselves pinned to the wall two feet off the ground with Eddie wolf-grinning in their face, making sure they have an understanding that the brat is never to go anywhere near Baby Byers ever again. Eddie would actually hurt someone smaller and younger than him, but just knowing they’re on Eddie’s radar is enough to make the bully nearly piss his pants every time he crosses paths with Will in the hallway for their remaining duration of high school.

When Jonathan first hears about Eddie sticking up for Will, he actually feels perturbed by it, if for no other reason than he feels guilty that he wasn’t there to defend his brother first.

In all honesty, Jonathan is downright jealous of Eddie when Will joins Hellfire because of how Will goes on and on about what an amazing DM Eddie is, but it manifests in a quiet, slow-burning kind of way. Eddie, on the other hand, doesn’t have a clue that there’s an issue, but that’s just because he assumes everyone outside of Hellfire hates him so he can’t be bothered about whatever problem Jonathan has with him.

Between Jonathan constantly complaining about Will being star-struck by Eddie and overhearing Will telling Mike he doesn’t understand why Jonathan’s suddenly so bent out of shape about everything, Nancy decides it's time to intervene.

“I’m the one who has to deal with him, and I for one am over the constant sulking.”

Nancy arranges a meeting between Eddie and Jonathan at the picnic table behind the school not only to clear the air between them, but for Will’s sake as well so the poor kid can stop wondering what he’s doing wrong.

Eddie is genuinely surprised that that’s the reason why after four years he’s getting so much animosity from Jonathan Byers, especially since Will practically worships the ground his brother walks on. “Won’t shut up about you during the Hellfire Club meetings.” That one of the first things Will told him at their first session was Will the Wise wouldn’t be the character he is without Jonathan.

Jonathan finally acknowledges that although he always wants to be there for Will, there are times when it’s just not going to happen, and he thanks Eddie for sticking up for him when he needed it.

Their friendship isn’t an immediate thing. They start hanging out by proximity because their circle of friends keeps overlapping. Jonathan still thinks Eddie is a little overwhelming at times, but he’s protective of Will and the other boys in Hellfire and gave them a place of belonging in the hell that’s high school, so he can’t help but respect him for that.

Unsurprisingly, it’s music that cements their friendship in place. They debate for hours over things like who’s the best guitarist, the best band, the best album, most of which end with “agree to disagree,” but by the end of it they have a newfound respect for one another.

Eddie is genuinely impressed by Jonathan’s photography. He tries to get technical by talking about lighting and framing and aperture and it’s very clear he doesn’t have a clue what he’s talking about, but the fact he’s trying means the world to Jonathan.

One topic they frequently revisit while high is how amazing their girlfriends are and how they’re always in awe and a little disbelieving that Chrissy Cunningham and Nancy Wheeler would ever want a pair of freaks like them. One of them always ends up crying by the end of the night.

[bugsyfics]

In Too Deep

Dark!Negan x Reader

Fandom: TWD

Summary: Negan’s punishment ends up being much darker than you hoped for expected.

Warnings: Smut/notsfw, dub con (verging on non con), yelling, arguing, degradation, hair pulling, choking, coercion, spit kink, breeding kink, sadomasochism, Negan’s dirty mouth

Word Count: 2.7k

A/N: if you are under 18 or you are sensitive to dark content do not read! You have been warned!

~I should probably point out that I don’t see Negan doing this is in any way. He’s made it clear he’s a respectable man, but… what if he’s respectable up until the point he realizes there’s something he wants and is willing do anything to get it. But that’s why this is called a dark!fic.~

However, if you like the story please reblog and give feedback! Thanks :)

With eager eyes you tapped your phone screen. 10:55.

As another gust of cool air swept past your exposed skin, you shivered. The cream colored dress you wore didn’t do much to protect you from the approaching fall night—nor the wandering eyes of the fraternity. You agreed to go out with a few friends, looking to grab a drink or two, and by nine, get the hell out of there before all the druggies arrived and the drunks broke out into fights. Instead, you still sat in front of the frat house, waiting for your ride on Saturday evening while your friends partied inside.

Where are you???

You texted your boyfriend quickly, shooting a look of distaste at a guy leaning against the doorway. He whistled.

“Ayo, mamí! Come inside, it’s chilly out there.”

Clearly he was looking for a fuck. You rolled your eyes at the catcaller, crinkling your nose, you said you were fine and wanted to be left alone. To your surprise, he actually got the hint and trudged back inside.

Filled with some relief, you sighed watching as your boyfriend’s Aston Martin parked along the curb. The heat from the car blanketed your chilled skin and you sat down humming in content. Breathing in the driftwood and pine air freshener you loved, your eyes closed briefly. Negan chewed his inner cheek as you averted your gaze, seemingly not amused by his lateness.

“Jesus! You look sexy, darlin’,” Negan broke the silence, and rested a hand on your thigh.

You mumbled a thank you and looked ahead at the road. Negan knew he was in the wrong, but damn, it was frustrating how long you held a grudge. Interestingly enough, being late wasn’t a rare occurrence. In fact, Negan had been late many times picking you up before and in the back of your mind, you always felt uneasy when he called to apologize. It never seemed genuine. You wanted to trust him and at times you felt like you had to, however, his “business” calls and coming home late from work never coincided with any plausible explanation.

“Where are we going?”

“Back to my place. Unless that wasn’t your plan.” Negan raised his eyebrows.

“Sure, but you don’t want to go to the bar first? It’s a Saturday night. No one is sitting around at home,” you said matter-of-factly.

Negan tilted his head back against the faux leather seat as his hands tensed around the wheel.

“I just thought we could try again… thought you were ready by now.”

You sighed, rubbing your shoulder, “Not to be an ass, but why the hell would I, a broke college student, want to bring a child into the world? What happened before was an accident.”

“And… I just can’t fathom birthing a baby I wouldn’t be one-hundred percent attentive to. I love you Nee, so fucking much, but I-I can’t. Not now at least.”

“Look, I shouldn’t have brought it up... I’m a shithead for that, okay. Just tired and had a long day,” he muttered, pinching the bridge of his nose.

“You know, if I wanted a drink, I could go home and pour myself some scotch. But you don’t fuckin’ like scotch, or bourbon, or really any other whiskey for that matter. So let’s go get drinks.”

You shrugged, “‘Kay.”

In an attempt to relax you, his hand found yours, giving it a comforting squeeze. His fingertips eventually drifted to your thigh, rubbing further underneath your dress. You let out a breathy no and pushed him away.

“Shit!” Negan grunted through gritted teeth. “You’re so goddamn pissy!”

You sat up in your seat and scoffed, snatching off the leather jacket Negan gave you to warm up with and chucked it into the back seat of the car.

“You wanna know why?!” you spat. “First of all, you left me waiting for two hours at some shitty frat house, you never pick me up on time, and now you're tired on the weekend! Your only plans were to drink whiskey and fuck me while you watched a NASCAR race on the tv!”

Negan’s veins were visibly protruding out of his neck, and with white knuckles he slapped the steering wheel. In the most deafening silence, he cut through city traffic. You broke into a cold sweat, heart racing, as the car swerved through an unfamiliar part of town.

“Negan, sto-stop. I know you’re pissed, but you’ve gotta calm down,” you reminded him. Your hands clenched, nails sorely biting at the skin, and they grew clammy the longer your anxiety lingered. The unfaltering scowl still etched onto his face, elicited a gasp from you.

“Oh fuck, please stop.”

Finally, Negan killed the engine in an empty parking lot of a Sears, and to say you were left paralyzed in your seat was an understatement. As his hazel eyes found yours, fear inched its way up your spine. Negan’s pupils were blown, eyes much darker than usual, and he raked a hand hastily through his salt and pepper hair. His tongue darted out to lick his dry lips, and a shallow breath blew past them.

“Take. Off. Your. Seatbelt.”

Negan’s eyes were primal.

“I—”

“Do it!” Negan sneered.

“Do it,” he lowered his voice, growling, “now.”

Abruptly, he slammed the armrest and you flinched, tensing further away. With a heavy breath, you did what you were told; however, you instinctively clenched your thighs at his demand. That surprised you.

Negan scratched over his graying stubble with a slow nod. You assumed he was thinking of what to say, piecing the words together, so they could roll past his tongue nicely. He pursed his thin lips with a pause before he began.

“I’m not sure if I made it clear that I’m sick of your shit, but I am.”

Glancing past Negan, you noticed the car was unlocked. You nodded with a nervous gulp.

“I can tolerate a lot, but this unappreciative fuckery you’re tryna pull is just not cuttin’ it. You talk to your daddy like that? Back talkin’ and screamin’ n’ shit?”

Breaking eye contact, you shook your head.

“N-no,” you stammered.

“Well shit, princess…” he exhaled sharply, eyes shifting back and forth, staring into yours. “ I have no clue where you got the idea I’d let this slide, exactly,” he pointed out and cocked his head.

Negan steepled his fingers and continued, “There’s a price to pay for that mouth you got on ya.”

Backing further into the seat, you whimpered at his taunting.

Radiating in sadism, Negan’s scowl slowly upturned into smirk. And finally, as he began to fully thrive off your apprehension, his mouth curled into a wolfy grin.

“I’m gonna need you outta that dress.”

•••

The back of your head rested on the cool window as you stared behind Negan and conjured up a plan. You reached behind yourself as if you were undressing, and felt for the door handle, quick enough not to be noticed, you assumed. When Negan’s fingers dug into your thigh, however, you knew it was a dangerous game you were playing.

“Testin’ the wrong man, sweetheart,” he reminded you.

You winced, feeling your skin start to bruise. Realizing this was your only opportunity, you dashed out the car, nearly tripping over your feet with the amount of force used to free yourself.

“What the fuckin’ fuck!” Negan roared, and you heard the car door slam. It was so loud you nearly pissed yourself.

“Get your ass back over here now!” His voice carried across the lot.

All the street lights were dim and the possibility of you making it back to campus —or at least to safety— was slim to none. Tears welled up in your exhausted eyes and you just cried. Possibly you didn’t have the energy to keep going, or you didn’t care what the outcome was, but you stood rigid. Eyes wide, you stared in anticipation towards the dark street where you assumed your boyfriend would appear.

“You can’t run from me, darlin’. When you do that… that’s a ball clenchin’ thing,” Negan rasped behind you, grabbing your arm.

Goosebumps prickled over your body at the familiar voice. You screamed bloody murder, thrashing and flailing as Negan pinned you against the ground. His hand quickly covered your mouth and he warned you to stop. Your brain was fogged and all you could think about was escaping the calloused fingers that ran up your bare thigh. Urging you to pay attention to his ministrations, you felt a hand lightly slap at your wet cheek. Negan leaned over you and his breath fanned your ear.

“I’m gonna bury my cock so deep in this pussy —fill it up with my cum— you’ll never want it to end, doll. But you know damn well I can’t just fuck ya. I need you to want this ‘cause I’m not all…”

In disgust Negan spat, “rapey.”

You whimpered. Not because of how scared you were —no, at how your skin burned hot at Negan’s touch. His hands roamed across your body, making sure to avoid where you needed him most. It was electrifying and that made you shameful. You cringed, fighting the urge to let him fuck you raw right there on the stiff, cold grass. Negan straightened up above you and you squirmed against the confines of his long legs. Cautiously he removed his hand, slick with spit and saliva, and judged if you’d scream again.

“We’re goin’ back to the car, a’right? Now, if you try anything this time I’ll tie you to a goddamn tree. Am I clear?”

“Ye-yes,” you squeaked.

Clenched even tighter, your legs felt like jelly and you couldn’t stand, let alone walk. He picked you up and threw you over his shoulder with your dirt covered ass pushed upwards into the air. There was something weirdly daring and erotic about his rash behavior that kept you craving more.

•••

In a swift motion, Negan unbuckled his leather belt and grunted, pulling out his length. The tip was red and raging for some friction, swollen under his hand. You weren’t surprised when you saw he was rock hard and not wearing any underwear, and the corner of your mouth tugged a bit. Negan tossed his head back against the seat as he rubbed himself. When his climax drew nearer he panted, thrusting his narrow hips to match the quick rhythm. After swearing incoherently he stopped, looking over.

“I’m not comin’ unless it’s in that sweet little pussy of yours, so I think it’s best if you ride it, doll.”

You drew your legs together, apprehensive to move a muscle, and you dared not to run again or Negan wouldn’t hesitate tying you up. He’s a psychopath —and although you were fully aware of that fact, your cunt still flooded, begging to wrap around the dick that happened to treat it well.

In a mousy voice, you whispered, “I think we should talk about this. It isn’t right… I don’t think you're okay.”

You were still frozen in place and Negan had enough of your little games. He was having his way, even if you screamed and cried. He knew despite your pleas and your goddamn back talking, that you loved exactly how that night was turning out. Deep down inside, you wanted him to claim your sopping cunt on the fucking pavement as you writhed against his body. Negan was man enough to know where to draw the line, but hell if he hadn’t taken you back to the car, you would’ve easily let him screw you on the grass.

Smirking, Negan snorted, “So now you don’t want to? That’s a damn shame… But we’re not here to make up and have some deep conversation. You piss me off, there’s repercussions. So be daddy’s good girl and let me put this dick to good use.”

Without hesitation, he reached under your dress for your panties and tore them off. You whimpered wanting to cover yourself. You fended off his persistent hand as it slipped between your legs, but your body betrayed your trepidation.

“I don’t think I can do this… please,” you gasped as he continued. “It’s so— sto-op, oh f-fuck!”

Negan leaned closer to you and he quickened his movements the more you grinded against his touch. A familiar warmth grew in the pit of your belly and you whimpered. Shame. As your breathing changed, heavier with lust, his name fell from your lips. You gritted your teeth as he sped up the teasing between your folds —yet still embarrassed, you fought him off and squeezed your thighs together. Your eyes drifted to his face and he frowned with a tsk, eyebrows furrowing. Sweat clung your ass and the leather seat as you awaited your punishment. Suddenly, he collared you by your throat, constricting you of airflow and shoved you far against the headrest. Negan’s face boiled, glaring with enraged eyes.

“Fuckin’ done with you…” Negan breathed, his face merely inches from yours.

“A man like me thinks with his cock… and right now?” he inhaled, “My cock is telling me to claim that hot pussy. I don’t care if you don’t like it. I don’t care if you cry. And trust me, once I get goin’ I don’t fuckin’ stop.”

Your stomach lurched at his words. Negan wove his fingers through your h/c hair, pulled loosely into a bun and forced you over the seat and on top of his seething frame. He pulled your face to his and kissed you roughly, invading your mouth with his wet tongue. His hands slid up your trembling sides and eventually rested around your neck. Negan pulled away with a hiss and manually pried open your mouth, spitting directly onto your pink tongue. He urged you to swallow. Cringing, you moaned and grinded your heat against him fervently, a dark chuckle escaped his lips.

“You’re so nasty. You’re so fuckin’ nasty, doll,” he growled.

A hand slid down and rested on your sex, drawing circles on your clit, over and over. Wary but nearing your limit, you rutted yourself against his fingers and let out a strangled moan. There was nothing worse than trying to escape a man who knew your body like the back of his hand. Each touch made you weak. Negan pulled away and watched as your juices ran down his fingers and he gave an approving nod. Clearly impressed with how quickly you were wet for him and he felt himself stir underneath you.

You needed more. Negan needed you worse.

Without warning Negan thrusted up into you in one fluid motion. A yelp got caught in your throat as his cock impaled you repeatedly. Your mouth gaped open from the sensation and Negan took it as an opportunity to slip his fingers inside, against your drooling tongue. He paused to pull out slowly and pushed back in you with a deeper thrust to relish in the tightness of your pussy and the way the arousal coated his cock. He surprised you with random strokes against your g-spot, that sent you heaving over his shoulder and moaning lusty, broken sentences into his ear.

“Ah, shit! Keep doin’ that… keep clenchin’ around me me, doll,” he slurred, smacking your ass harshly and your eyes rolled back.

He grabbed your face, glistening with sweat, and held your gaze with his desire filled eyes, peering at you from under hooded lids.

“This is where your pussy belongs,” he whispered above your lips, his voice dripping with a cunning tone. He tongued his cheek cockily and slammed into your convulsing walls, grunting wildly. “Bouncin’ on my cock and taking every inch! You’re mine, darlin,’ always will be. Don’t ever forget it.”

Negan rubbed your clit again, causing your orgasm to bubble over and you chanted his name like a mantra. Your back painfully dug into the steering wheel, but you were so drunk off pleasure, the pain quickly subdued. Chuckling darkly, he continued fucking you until he came, spurting ropes of come inside you.

“Good thing you’re not on birth control. Would’ve taken years to try again if I didn’t swap that shit out.”

Realizing what he’d done you tried to pull away, kick him, anything. Cursing and screaming, you clawed at his shoulders, smacking at his face to make him pull out, but he refused. You sniffled as a tear slid down your burning cheeks and you wiped it away bitterly. Negan held your hips down with a tight squeeze. As if Negan could get any more menacing, his grin was gleeful, titling his head so you couldn’t ignore his dimples.

“Ah, ah, ah! I’m makin’ sure you’re stayin’ with me for a long time.”

— bugs

Taglist: @iluvneganandjamie

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[gatefleet]

Jealousy

Sherlock (BBC): Sherlock Holmes, James 'Jim' Moriarty Word Count: 609 (T)W: Jealousy, envy, teasing Request: Yes, "May I request a one shot? A Sherlock x reader (x Moriarty) where Sherlock likes the reader but can’t tell her cause he could risk the friendship, but then Moriarty comes and starts flirting with the reader and the reader is flustered. Sherlock then gets jealous and mad. He ends up telling the reader how he feels. Just some jealous fluff please." - @fantactictapple A/N: Sutoritaimu Archive

John was beyond annoyed at the fact that Sherlock was so clearly into his ‘platonic’ friend, that it hurt.  He and Mary had devised many a plan with the intention of getting Sherlock to finally admit to you how he felt, but every time Sherlock would ruin it or just wouldn’t turn up, he claimed it was because he didn’t want to ruin their friendship.  Mary and John knew better, they knew it was because Sherlock was afraid he’d hurt you in some way, even when it was accidental because he wasn’t ‘built for a relationship’ of any kind out with professional.  Every time John and Mary would bring up the fact that Sherlock was ‘more tolerable’ and ‘smiled more’ when you were around just made Sherlock become more and more adamant that he wasn’t interested in you in that way, he admired your spunk, your tenacity, the fact you had no fear and would tell him what you thought to his face.

Sherlock was deeply regretting not telling you how he felt about you sooner, especially when he saw you getting closer and flirting with none other than the man who Sherlock had tried to protect you from.  James Moriarty.  At first, when you had told Sherlock that you had met someone and wasn’t sure where it was going, he was semi-happy for you, but mostly he was disappointed that it meant he had probably missed his window of opportunity.  When the mystery caller would phone you would get flustered and Sherlock would see a deep blush begin to crawl up your neck and face.  His heart would sink a little every time he would hear your laughter (genuine and flirty) whilst talking to the mystery man.

When Sherlock finally discovered that the ‘mystery man’ was Moriarty, the emotions Sherlock was trying to keep at bay spilled over.  He couldn’t understand why, after everything he had told you about Moriarty, you would be ‘seeing’ and flirting with him.  John couldn’t tell if Sherlock’s reaction was out of concern or jealousy. 

“I can’t believe how after everything I’ve told you about Moriarty! All the warnings you’d still allow him into your life Y/N!” Sherlock sounded like he was about to cry – or was John just imagining that part?

“Seriously Sherlock?!  For years I’ve been waiting for you to make the first move, for you to be honest with me! And when I finally accept that maybe you don’t feel the same way I do, and finally move on you pull this!” You were frustrated at Sherlock’s reaction and couldn’t fathom why he was behaving this way.

“Y/N, have you ever considered for one-minute second that I do feel the same way!  That my heart has been slowly breaking every time you’ve been speaking on the phone with the mystery guy who turns out to be my nemesis!?” Sherlock couldn’t contain the liquid that spilled from his eyes this time.

“what?”  You were no longer shouting, your voice was, calm… confused…  “Sherlock… wha… what are you saying?  Are you saying that your jealous?”  Sherlock gave an exasperated sigh and John could hear movement as though Sherlock had lifted his arms in the air and let them fall at his sides.

“Y/N, I don’t want anything bad to happen to you.  Ever.  You mean so much to me, that you don’t even realise it.  I never wanted to admit anything because I didn’t want to appear weak, but you, Y/N, you’re my weakness and I can’t afford to let anyone know that.”  Sherlock was so close to your face now, forehead resting on yours, trying his best to maintain eye contact.

GIF Credit: @chhagiya

[chrisevansluv]

Ive seen too much stuff in fandoms. The day that people learn they cannot over analyze the life of a famous person because the things you think you know either don’t exist or aren’t the way they seem and you’ll never fathom the amount of things you don’t know.

Chris is open and shares certain things with the public, yes but he still has a level of privacy. I’m sick and tired of living in a society where people assume if you don’t post something on social media it means you aren’t friends or you don’t care, the true is when people DON’T post or doesn’t follow is how I know who or what is genuinely important to them to the point they protect it.

People gave Lizzy hell for not posting condolences for Chadwick not realizing she was grieving a friend or a coworker. The black panther cast took WEEKS to post…..why because they were DEVASTATED. When you lose someone close you don’t run to social media to post unless it’s to announce it to the world so that you can grieve in peace, the world knew and his friends and family were hurting.

Chris posted because he chose to and I’m sure grieved. I’m sure the marvel fam had PRIVATE convos amongst each other. It has to suck to be famous at times because you have to make a statement to the world when the situation is none of the world’s business.

Chris reached out to Lakeith and no one knew until Lakeith shared, Imagine how much else were not aware of. ….why, because it’s none of our business.

I just cannot understand why people think it’s okay to nitpick others lives but would not want anyone to do the same to there’s. This whole celeb and “normie” bullshit, we’re all humans and trust when there is no more breath in any of our bodies, the fame, money, status, lack of status, etc isn’t going to be the things that matter in the end. People are wasting their lives and can’t even see it, just sad all the way around. Let these people who have gained a platform inspire you to do better in your life but understand they are humans too who lives are just public….make sure you don’t spend your valuable life and time so consumed with the life of another.

Stan culture is toxic and getting worse and honestly it’s not stans it’s humans in general. Chris seems like a great guy and if you choose to Stan anyone I think he’s a great option but remember that…..he’s just a guy. A guy who has a team a guy who is human, a guy who happened to become a famous actor, he’s not Prince Charming although he may have a bit of that in him. I think he has a great heart that seems rare regardless of the fame and notoriety.

I wish this man finds someone who loves him beyond the fame, money and crap and I hope he finds that balance of Hollywood and normalcy he seems to be seeking.

As far as fans please keep things in perspective, we don’t own celebs and what appears as one thing majority of the time is the opposite. Celebs are humans, the same humans you work with, are friends with, communicate with daily. Imagine a friend getting famous and you knowing what you know about your friend, you see people who would’ve previously ignored them, now fawning and screaming in the presence of them….you’d think these folks were insane…..think about it. The obsession of Chris’ or any other’s dating life, the ongoing discussions from a pictures, rumors, etc, the assumptions…..it’s ALL insane!!

Go live and enjoy your lives.

Happy Monday. 😎💙

.

[the-cult-of-russo]

Hi!! So i just read your billy headcanon about him and reader arguing and it was so good! I loved how thorough you were and i liked how the stages are so accurate to his personality! What do you think him and reader would argue about?

Once again, my brain is total chaos. It's my chaos and I understand it but trying to get it down for others to make sense of makes my head hurt lmao

First of all, I'm gonna do two sections. One for things that Billy would start a fight over, and one that you'd pick a fight over. Basically, things you do to upset him enough to cause a fight and then things he'd do that upset you enough to cause a fight.

If you haven't seen my other headcanon about how Billy acts during a fight, find it here. I reference his Stages of Rage in this so it'll make sense if you've read it.

Also remember this is my Billy.

-

Billy:

Billy can be impulsive and he has a temper. That being said, he's learnt really well over the years how to push it down. He's got good at stuffing his anger in a box and dealing with it another time somehow. Sometimes people wouldn't even know just how pissed he is. Yet with you, sometimes you do things that drive him to the brink of insanity and he finds it hard to deal with it.

The thing with Billy is, any negative emotion turns to anger. He doesn't know how to cope with it otherwise. And the things you'd do to cause him to fight with you don't actually make him genuinely angry. They've made him upset, hurt, or scared. All feelings he loathes to feel and they morph into anger instead.

The first thing that would cause him to fight with you is jealousy. Its not that he doesn't trust you because he does. He trusts you explicitly. But for all of his outward bravado and confidence, he has a lot of deep rooted self worth issues stemming from his childhood. Those disgusting feelings of not being good enough, of not being worthy of love or happiness, of not being wanted. All of those have been buried down inside of him yet you seem to bring them out kicking and screaming.

He's terrified of you leaving him. He finally has something special, worth every bit of pain he's suffered. He's finally found happiness. He feels like he's got to cling onto you desperately, fingers bloodied as he clutches you so hard like you might float away the second he let's up.

So when you and Billy are out with friends and you go up to the bar, he watches you with a dopey smile because he can't help it. But it gets wiped off his face the second some asshole approaches you. He knows it's ridiculous when the green eyed monster rears its head, he knows because although you smile at the man, it's tense. It's a polite but awkward smile as you shake your head and clearly tell him you're not interested.

Yet Billy's chest hurts. Because what if you see something in this man you don’t see in him? What if this guy is the one who steals you away from him? What if this is when you open your eyes and realise how worthless he is and you leave him?

He's aware his brain is being overdramatic yet he can't help the anger building inside of him. The defense mechanism of turning his pain and terror and sadness into something he can deal with.

And he doesn't want to cause a scene around all of your friends. So he goes the rest of the night being quiet and a little distant. You know somethings wrong and have a good idea what. But Billy suddenly feels miles away.

As soon as you get home, he let's it loose, unable not to. It sometimes starts with The Snark, passive aggressive comments about the man at the bar and how you should have gone home with him. 

But he gets angrier.

Because you don't get it. You tell him nothing happened and that he's being stupid but you don't fucking get the agonising fear that's crippling him because he's not good enough for you. So The Loudmouth stage begins because if he's wounded, he's gonna wound you right back.

But somewhere along the way you see through the anger. You see the pain in his glossy eyes, hear the tremor in his voice. Suddenly you hear everything he isn't saying. Instead of yelling at him that he's being dramatic or stupid, you switch tactics. You reassure him. You tell him he's the only one for you and you soothe his wounds by trying to get him to see that.

Although he still doesn't believe it, he likely never will, it does bring him back to earth. And of course he says sorry for the remarks he made but you know he was only lashing out because he was hurting.

-

The other thing that will get him to fight with you is also because of fear. If you put yourself in situations where you could possibly get hurt, even if it's something small like walking home in the dark, he flips his shit. He hates it, doesn't understand why you'd be so reckless. And while sometimes he's being overboard with it, too overprotective, he doesn't see it that way.

Billy's been through a lot, seen a lot of shit, done even more. He knows how dark this world gets. So if you ever put yourself in danger, even a small bit by being reckless, you're damn right he's gonna lash out at you. He goes through every stage of rage (except the last) if you try and defend your actions because he can't fathom the fact you aren't seeing his side with this. Why you won't let him just protect you. If he had his way, he'd put you in a bubble to keep you safe.

-

Other than that, there isn't much else you do that causes him to really fight with you. He's not petty. He's not the type to pick a fight over mundane stupid shit like you leaving your clothes all over the bedroom. Even if it does annoy him since he's such a neat freak.

Anything that you do that elicits those awful negative emotions are what gets to him.

-

You:

Billy's flirting is certainly a bone of contention. And while it doesn't happen often and it's never really serious since you two got together, sometimes it slips out of his mouth like it's second nature to him. Because it is. An example of this is at an event. He pays a flirty compliment to a senators daughter thats been eyeing him. He doesn't even know he's done it, doesn't seem phased until he sees your face. But he's at work, important business and schmoozing to do and he doesn't want you to cause a scene.

But waiting until you get home only annoys you more. It was an offhand comment and you know deep down he didn't mean it. But it still hurts you because he's with you. And you knew damn well if you did that to him he'd lose his shit. But you patiently wait until you get home, giving him the cold shoulder the whole way. And he knows what's coming. It's happened before.

But the thing with Billy is that he gets defensive if he feels backed into a corner. So when you whirl on him the second you get home, he pushes right back. He thinks you're blowing it way out of proportion and honestly, if you'd approached him calmly about it, he'd apologise right away and tell you he'd do better. But the fact you’re yelling at him has his back up so he can't seem to find it in himself to see it your way at all.

At first you don't tell him the real reason why it hurt you. You're just pissed. But as the argument unfolds you blurt out why it stung so much and his anger gets sucked right out of him. He watches you, devastation on his face as he realises you don't feel loved enough, that you think he'd go behind your back, that he'd find someone else. That notion is absurd to him, like he'd ever do such a thing when he has everything he ever wanted with you. But knowing he's hasn't shown you enough how much he cares wounds him deeply.

So he comforts you, promises he'll make it up up you and it won't happen again and he makes sure to make time to make you see just how much he loves you and only you.

-

Another thing that tends to get you upset at him is Anvil. Billy works a lot, too much most times. The amount of times he's coming home when you're already asleep or has to cancel plans with you starts to weigh on you. Building up until you explode about it.

But once again, Billy feels backed into a corner. Anvil is way more than just a company to him. It's a physical manifestation of how far he's come in life. It's proof that he's come all this way and he's done it all on his own. Anvil is like his baby.

And if it ever came down to picking Anvil or you, yes he'd pick you. But deep down he might end up resenting you for it. Because Anvil is an extention of him and his work makes up who he is. You knew this when you met him. It starts to feel like you're trying to change him and that gets right under his skin. Because if you want to change him, then you don't love him as he is. And that shit hurts.

He's already tried his best to placate you over Anvil. He works less, only staying late if its imperative he does and he tries his best to make time for you. He knows it's hard and he's away more than you'd like but he's fucking trying. So it feels like a smack in the face when you do this, like you can't see how much he's ready done to try and make a life where he can have both.

He works hard to keep the company the best it can be, he has to. But he also works hard for you. Because one day he wants to buy a big house and possibly fill it with children with you. He wants to show you the world and give you everything you've ever wanted. So it makes him feel unappreciated.

He feels stuck between a rock and a hard place every damn time this argument comes up because he doesn't know what else to do. He's trying his hardest to juggle Anvil and you and sometimes it feels like you're making it hard for him. He can't change who he is and if you can't handle it then it kills him. Because he knows if you can't deal with it then eventually you'll leave and he thinks he might just die if that happens.

These arguments get explosive because of all the emotions it makes him feel and sometimes you don't speak for days after. Both of you miserable as you miss the other. Deep down you know he's trying his best and you feel bad because you know how much these fights upset him. Eventually you apologise. You knew Anvil was his world before you met, knew how hard he worked. You don't want to change him and if you're honest with yourself, he's done a damn good job of making sure there's a place for you in his life. And maybe you never imagined you'd settle down with a workaholic, to miss them all the time, but it's worth it.

-

The last thing is how Billy's past seems to have a way of haunting you both. You were well aware of his nature before you met, he'd been pretty upfront about it. But sometimes it's hard when you're at an event with him and one of his past one night stands are there or you both run into one in the street.

This doesn't cause a full blown argument. If anything it's more one sided and Billy soon learns you've been taking tips from his Stages of Rage handbook when you use The Snark on him. You can't help it. The bitter jealousy that creeps in. But he doesn't fight back because for once he's a little ashamed of his past behaviour. He never wanted to settle down, didn't see the point. But that's because he hadn't met you yet. But now he sees your face everytime he's approached by a past lover and it hurts him. It makes him worry that you'll leave him one day.

So he accepts the anger and passive aggressive comments you throw at him because he feels like he deserves them. But his unwillingness to fight back has you sobering up pretty quickly. Because you know realistically it's not his fault and you can't hold his behaviour from before you even met over his head. It comes from insecurity and its not fair to lash out at him. And you hate how sad he seems when you do this to him. So you say sorry and make it up to him.

-

The last thing I'll touch on is his last Stage of Rage that mentioned in my other post. The Snowstorm. I said how this meant you'd done some really bad. Like maybe even break-up bad. This is where he turns off his emotions because you've hurt him that much. I wanted to give an example of what might cause him to do that.

The biggest one of course would be you cheating on him. It would be a knife right through his heart. He'd want to forgive you for the fact he loves you more than anything but betrayal isn't something he takes lightly. Couple that with him already having self worth issues and feeling not good enough for you and you have a very broken Billy on your hands.

Maybe in time he could move past it after some separation and a lot of thinking. But this would be the worst thing to happen to him.

[lemonluvgirl]

I love Katniss but sometimes she gets on my nerves she had Peeta Mellark. (PEETA MELLARK!) Angel of a boy want to cuddle and play with her hair and would risk his life for her and the rooftop date and didn't ever really expect reciprocated feelings no matter how hard it was for him and she just was like 👀 "I don't see anything like it's all an act like I don't feel the same" HELLO WHAT I wish my love life was hers like Im crushing on my ex guy friend I don't rlly speak to anymore it's BAD

Well, Peeta Mellark is the ultimate fictional boyfriend so yeah, while I was reading THG I had a lot of moments where I shook my head at Katniss when she passed up opportunities to explore or embrace her feelings for Peeta.

I am of the mindset that she felt differently for him/had a slight crush on him early on but struggled with admitting it to herself. Now I don't blame it all on Katniss. There were a lot of contributing factors to many of the misunderstandings that happened to hinder them forming a romantic relationship.

Namely, Peeta never talked to her before the Games. So...when you say she thought it was all an act that's because she had a legitimate reason to believe it was for most of the first book. They didn't know each other. Sure, she knew he was a nice guy, but they were forced to became tributes in The Hunger Games. Katniss figured all bets were off at that point, and they could never even be friends. Because they would have to kill each other or watch the other die in the arena. So she tried really hard not to get attached. (And Katniss is good at not getting attached. Like, she could teach a master class on the subject)

She operated with a survivor's mentality and she thought for sure that Peeta would abandon his nice guy persona in order to survive. Because that's what the Games did to people. Stripped them of their humanity and turned them into something they were not. It was a rare thing that Peeta had such a strong sense of self and high moral character and didn't succumb to the barbaric kill or be killed attitude when it came to Kantniss.

Also, Peeta declaring his love for her on national tv WAS BOTH a strategy to win the Games (for Katniss, but it ended up helping him too) and also a confession of his true feelings. It also scared the shit out of Katniss, because she was trying to prepare herself to go into a gladatorial death match and kill other kids her age, not get caught up in a teenage romance. Her mind was focused on coming home to her sister and mother, and handsome nice guy Peeta was acting all SUS around her. First being friendly, then wanting to train alone, then declaring feelings for her out of the blue, then allying with the careers, then betraying the careers to help her. 

Homeboy had Katniss going back and forth so many times he must have given her whiplash. Now, its easy to see how much he loved her from the perspective of the observer. Readers can look back and say how obvious it was that Peeta was being genuine. Hindsight is 20/20 after all. But Katniss couldn’t read Peeta’s mind. And for all this talk about how Peeta had a way with words he left out some important information and failed to have a lot of honest and blunt conversations. (And Katniss is someone who needs things spelled out very bluntly for her.) She is not good at figuring out people’s motives, she assumes everyone is like her and is operating on a need to survive 24/7. In the first book she can’t even fathom someone being motivated by romantic love or a noble cause. (Until Peeta gives her his I don’t want to become somehting I’m not speech) That’s why she missed all of Peeta’s signals. Because he was speaking a language she doesn’t understand. 

And that’s why their love story is so hard fought and hard won. Because Katniss has to learn, and basically teach herself to be emotionally vulnerable again after being subjected to so much tragedy and horror. I mean the girl fell in love in a span of two years in between two hunger games and a literal war. I think if their lives had been a little more stable, and if there hadn’t been so much pressure on them to perform and keep up the act, then Katniss would have worked out how she felt about Peeta a lot quicker. 

The good news is she eventually got it right. She loved Peeta back in a way that was healthy for both of them. And Peeta fell back in love with her too. I know sometimes it’s hard to acknowledge that the struggle had to happen the way it did for the end result to be worth it, but I think for the most part Peeta’s investment in Katniss paid off. 

Now, when I look at Katniss’ love life I don’t envy her at all. She had a lot of tough choices to make and she was put in a lot of difficult situations while she had to make them. I mean, you can’t have the kind of bond Katniss and Peeta have without the Hunger Games. Yes, they could have still fallen in love in an alternate universe but it would have been different. They would have been different people, and had a very different relationship. So, no. I really don’t think anybody should envy Katniss’ love life because it was a messed up dumpster fire. She went through so much turmoil and heartache, and not all of it was her fault, as I pointed out. 

Life is not always like books. And sometimes that’s a good thing. I think Peeta is awesome but I’m glad he’s a fictional character in a story because that also means the Hunger Games are fictional. The rest of us real people have opportunities to go out and find love on our own terms without the threat of being thrown into an arena and facing imminent death. Also a good thing. 

Everyday is a gift, and an opportunity. So, if you are considering a relationship with someone, do it on your own terms, and for the right reasons. Real love is messy even without the Hunger Games. But I hope you find that special someone who makes you as happy as Peeta makes Katniss. 

Good luck anon, and may the odds be ever in your favor. <3