#I find it exciting and super interesting
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Fanfic Writing - New Year's Resolutions
Hey fellow fic writers <3 I know it's still not the end of the year, but it's December and I'm impatient, so I would like to share with you my writing plans for 2024 and ask you to do so too, if you want to. My Ao3 for convenience is Yuujeong, where you can check out all the things I'll be referencing below. So, in my case, I *hope* that in 2024, I will be able to: - write at least one more chapter for "Little House on the Hill" (I make no promises though, I've kind of moved on from that fic, even though it holds such a special place in my heart) - write and post the third installment of my "Heroes and Villains" series (I have neglected this one for months but I hadn't figured out this fic completely up until last month, when the full picture of it came to me and I managed to get unstuck. Hopefully, next year you'll be reading it) - finish and post the sequel to "Broken Vows" (istg I haven't forgotten it, on the contrary, it haunts my dreams, it's just such a tricky little shit that I ended up asking for help about it. It'll be in such capable hands now, and I hope people will enjoy reading it) - continue my Kim&Pete fic series (the second installment won't be too difficult to write - she says, as if she doesn't need at least a month for a fic to be written and edited before posting - but the one after that will be multi-chaptered and looong, so I'll need time and a lot of effort to pull it off. 2024 *will* see this series written and concluded though, I swear) - ARMPETE!! (I have a fic I've been meaning to work on for months now and it'll probably end up not being multi-chaptered as I intended at first. Unfortunately the inspiration for more than that has run out BUT I will enrich the fandom with this rarepair or so help me-) - write at least one BostonNick fic (there's one that's the most likely to be written, which is about Boston getting a haircut and I think it's cute and would love to explore the idea. Also, a Nick character study fic because my boy deserves the world) - write smut! Yep, in 2024 we're getting horny baby (prepare for some VP somno shenanigans, because there's not nearly enough of it in the fandom and that's a huge shame) - participate in at least one fandom event (the kpts Big Bang, while stressful for multiple reasons, was incredibly fun and I would love to do something like that again - same goes for things like Secret Santa events which are cool too) - try writing fics for some of my other favorite shows besides kpts (kpts was unique in the way only TMNT has been for me before, which was it giving me so many brainworms I needed to express my self artistically in the only way I was capable. In 2024, I would like to revisit some of my favorite shows and figure out if the same can happen with them too) I probably have more to share but I'll leave it here. Now, for the tags, I'd love to see the plans of @wisteria-daydreamer @wretchedamaranth @xxhappy-chickenxx @coleslaww @raksh-writes @mightymightygnomepriest @lu-sn @suzteel @fleet-off @justanothervariant @theoldastronomer @dual-desires @emberfaye @tsttoain @thisautistic and ALL the other people who are escaping my mind rn but their works are equally important! Please, if you want to share your writing plans, do so and tag me, I'd love to see them <3
#decided to make a post like this because I really want us all to talk about what we're planning writing-wise#I find it exciting and super interesting#sorry to those who have never interacted with me but still got tagged I come in peace#I'm just interested to know what beautiful stories you will be preparing and posting next year <3#fanfic writing#ask game
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Luffy proudly showing off his crew to Ace is so cute
#how he describes them is hilarious#love that he's like obviously Zoro is first priority and his dream is cool so I need to mention it and also what he wears#also because he finds it cool or because he wants Ace to recognise him???#listing what Nami likes is super cute#Sanji is obvs about the food he makes cos what else is Luffy thinking about#my poor boy Usopp gets no respect#and neither does Chopper but what can you expect from a captain who didn't even know he was a doctor when he recruited him#also I'm imagining Luffy is jumping when saying they're all so interesting cos he really is excited over how interesting they all are#monkey d. luffy#portgas d ace#fire fist ace#one piece#alabasta crew#alabasta saga#alabasta#straw hat pirates
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I drew Ted from the wonderful @nabwastaken ‘s Time Bastard Au! The original design is by the talented @midnightnautilus , and was so very fun to draw!
#it’s a very fun au#I enjoy it quite a bit#I mean it’s hard to go wrong when making hatchetfield characters superheroes#although nobody should ever give Ted super powers#my man would wreak so much havoc#he's just a silly guy tho#I loved drawing him in this costume#drawing horns is so much fun#and I got to do a little comic book type halftone moment that I don’t get to do in a lot of my drawings#I love the halftone effect so much so when I find a drawing I can use it with I get very excited#anyways yall should go check out the au#Midnightnautilus has got some awesome art for it and the concept is so very good#let’s see what’s a fun fact for this one#fun fact: the person who created the early version of the Polygraph (lie detector) test also came up with Wonder Woman!#It's really interesting especially when you remember that Wonder Woman has the lasso of truth#Ted spankoffski#hatchetfield#time bastard#time bastard au#hatchetverse#team starkid#starkid#hatchetfield au#tinky#tnoy karaxis#the guy who didnt like musicals#nightmare time#my art#others idea
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Everyone say hello to the Jones Boys' new dog, Othello! He's a very big boy, and I love him ❤️
After we got Othello, a stranger showed up to hang out. If Mechi has anything to say about it, he probably won't be here for long.
YES!!! Finally!!! The first piece of the puzzle!! Time to scrounge up whatever social skills we can and make friends with Wasbum. We have to get that map piece!
First | Next | Previous
#rimworld#gracie plays#A Mechanitor's Message#art#my art#traditional art#rimworld art#unpolished art#slightly more polished art than usual#Othello is a good boyyyy#He would have gotten along so well with Brandy...#oh well#It'll be nice to have a big great dane around to watch out for Ivy when she's a bit older#Alfihar is not very interesting#He did show up wearing all black like XiaoLiang just less cool#He also stole a janissary helmet we had lying around but Mechi and Kwahu weren't going to wear it so I figured he could have it#we dyed it black to match his ensemble#And at long last#WE CAN FIND THE ARCHONEXUS!!#or the first part of it anyway#Time to start building up the most kickass colony#make it super rich and expensive#with lots of cool tech#How exciting!!!#have an awesome day <3 <3 <3
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In my opinion one particularly interesting thing about the Legion is their denial of the fact that they are just as humanly flawed as everybody else.
Maybe I'm looking into it too much, but I find it fascinating just how firmly Vulpes believes that Nipton is worthy of its gruesome fate, not only because they were "degenerates" but also, specifically, because they did not try to save their loved ones when met with the lottery. This, Vulpes claims, is because they thought they could win freedom for themselves.
When you, the player, waltz into the Fort and ask some questions, Caesar tells you Lanius likes punishing legionaries with decimatio, where every tenth man is executed by his fellow legionaries.
Does Vulpes believe those legion men aren't banking on surviving by luck? Does Vulpes believe this isn't the same thing? Going along with the Leopards Eating Faces Party hoping your face will get eaten last?
Perhaps this was supposed to be an obvious parallel and it just took me a while to make the connection, but I can't stop thinking about it. Their degenerate ways, our loyal soldiers accepting punishment. The Legion is the awful awful train wreck I can't look away from.
#i feel it goes without saying that i also dislike the legion for all their other murdery business#but i find it super interesting to find all the other flaws in their ways of thinking#I'm not surprised the flaws are there I'm just excited to find them#fnv#fallout#the legion#vulpes inculta
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Having thoughts on The Acolyte.
I've seen a lot of commentary about how the show doesn't feel like Star Wars because it's not a hopeful show. Hope is central to Star Wars, and I think this commentary is fair at a surface level, especially given the other Star Wars stories already told, but (for me, at least) the show still feels like Star Wars and here's why.
It is a show that focuses on misguided viewpoints. The politicians have a misguided view of the Jedi. The Force cult have opposing views of the Jedi. The Sith of course have a skewed view of the Jedi. We are shown several flawed Jedi making questionable, misguided choices. I had no expectations going into this series that it was ever going to paint the Jedi in a kind light-- because it's a Sith story.
The hope that's featured in the show is a personal sort, not a broad, overarching hope for mankind and the future. It's about small, personal hopes for something better or, more often, something that the characters feel they deserve. It's mostly rooted in ridding oneself of what's holding them back and embracing personal freedom. That's great on the surface! But if you look closely, it fits right into the Sith code.
Mae is driven by a sense of (from her point of view) justice to avenge the death of her mother and her people. Osha hasn't come to terms with her anger and grief and her belief that Mae's actions fully resulted in the loss of her mother and people and had buried those emotions rather than facing them as the Jedi would teach her. Osha's journey is one of apparent truth and clarity. There is truth in the reality that Sol was wrong in his actions (misguided and well-intentioned as he was). It isn't necessarily wrong that Osha is angry at the lies she was told. Instead of burying or facing her negative emotions, she embraces them under the guise of facing the truth of them. There's a running theme of "truth in freedom, freedom in truth" to what's being offered to the dark side characters in the show.
Osha and The Stranger clasp hands over her dead Jedi Master's bled lightsaber and stare out into the sunset while Vernestra covers up recent events to the Chancellor and meets with Yoda in private. It's framed as freeing and hopeful for our Sith-aligned characters because it is-- for them. For the Jedi, it is damning. These are two statements that can coexist. And yet, through Osha's agreement with The Stranger and Mae's memory erasure, we are presented a crumb of hope for Mae's future with Vernestra.
This is very much a Sith story, not a Jedi story, and I think once that's taken into consideration the apparent lack of hope in the story makes perfect sense. It's a different kind of hope, underlined by a grim reality that it is a false hope, the promises of the dark side. It isn't a story the Jedi would tell you~
#The Acolyte#the acolyte spoilers#verosha aniseya#osha aniseya#mae aniseya#sw meta#it's totally cool if the acolyte wasn't your cup of tea#but this show is NOT a jedi story so it's not going to have that overall feeling of hope to it that all the other movies and shows have#it's a sith story#it's a side of a story that we've seen bits of through the other jedi-driven stories#but not one we've had told from a strictly sith viewpoint#and that's exciting!! for me at least#i love the jedi#i also find the sith and dark side-driven stories very interesting#i don't think those stories should just be restricted to fanfic#like maybe that's my old republic novels and games loving self speaking#but the sith are super important to the jedi's stories!!
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emma i can't stress enough how much i ALWAYS want to hear about philslion from you. yap away queen
OKAY HERE YOU GO 🫡🫡 first philslion tweeted this:
video linked is private now but you can find it on the wayback machine. phil pops up at the end, but just as himself, talking about what he would do if he were a girl. so i guess the "best friends with my queen" joke from lion is referencing phil as a girl even though phil wasnt dressed as phillippa. then a couple of days later, after phil posted "phillippa," philslion tweeted this:
which honestly there are so many different ways to interpret lmao, but any way you look at it, lion *cough dan cough* was a fan of phillippa 👀
#IM FUCKING???????????? WHEN I WAS GETTING THE LION TWEETS I WAS ALSO LOOKING AT PHIL'S TWEETS FROMA ROUND THAT DAY TO SEE WHAT HE SAID#ABOUT THE PHILLIPPA VIDEO AND I DIDNT FIND ANYTHING ITNERESTING BUT I JUST FOUND???? THE FUCKING CRAZIEST TWEETS FROM PHIL AND LION#I'LL POST ABOUT IT SOON BUT LIKE. HOLY FUCKING SHIT 😭😭😭😭😭#(eta ok i was getting a little excited it's not like super crazy but. certainly interesting)#ask#homohabu#d&p#phan#philslion
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Zenos, who is relying on vague advice about "love languages" after hearing his boyfriend mention a cheesy obscure eroge a single time while he was in the room
#Eorzea Academy#Academia Eorzea#Zenos yae Galvus#Au Ra Xaela#zenoswol#wolzenos#codysenshiart#Eorzea Academy ArkheZenos is just various antics with Zenos parroting relationship advice extremely literally#because he's of the mind that intimate activities don't make sense to dwell on when they physically excite each other enough in battle#but he does think it's fair to compromise somehow since Arkhe drops everything to fight him all the time so he sought the advice#he'll not say a single word to Arkhe when he listens to what Arkhe expresses interest in and manages to get the best editions of it all#the shiniest and newest and rarest that're impossible to find#and he never once reveals how he gets the stuff because it's not important to him#he was told you can give gifts to your special someone to show your appreciation of them and he's doing just that#and yes he gets 99% of the stuff in super shady ways this is Zenos we're talking about he'd do whatever he wanted to get the stuff#his whole thing when expressing his feelings in other ways that aren't combat-oriented boils down to ''I don't get it but whatever''
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#more eariferous angle under the cut#i'm just making up fuckin words at this point. english is just a fun toy for me to play with#having a conversation with me is just english parallel play#grafaiai#anyway i like this pokémon. monkey. i don't know how i feel about the whole “it eats berries and then sticks its finger in its mouth#to use the berry juice as paint” thing. but it's definitely an interesting concept. just. don't do it when i'm around :)!#like it's SUCH an interesting concept that game freak 1. made a whole area revolving around it (tagtree thicket)#that also happened to be notorious for being one of the laggiest areas in the game but that's not relevant here#and 2. revealed this thing before the game came out because they were so excited to tell everyone about this fun concept they came up with#i always find it interesting what pokémon concepts they prioritize. like they put so much work into this guy#and came up with a super interesting concept and a whole in-game area surrounding it#and then you have like. kilowattrel. who is. a bird‚#see i'm already dunking on kilowattrel again i'm so sorry kilowattrel fans. nothing going for that lad
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Drops this Moe and refuses to elaborate.
....
Drops this extremely messy kinda janky sketch of Alfonse (?) and refuses to elaborate.
#fire emblem#feh#reusing my autistic burnout moe design for. nefarious purposes......#with some interesting new touches!#... don't get too excited though. that thang is like. dead dead. like for real actually dead and NOT coming back.#not as a ghost metaphor either i mean it is for real Dead. as a divorce metaphor. what who said that#anyways today was def like. recovery/regulation day. i woke up super early watched the sun rise#took my meds an hour early and drew until my hands broke. AND I FEEL. SO RUSTY. AAAUGH#hoping maybe i bounce back to normal routine tomorrow. and one day. one day.#i'll find the strength to emerge from the talking to myself corner. parallel play but for talking.#fe alfonse#moe tag#summoner oc#damn do i tag lif here?????? well. lif mention.#the sketch is janky as fuck i'm not gonna. these are just. the TINIEST of snippets from today.#also did like. a lot of writing. ball rolling yes anding and. i can fit SO much bullshit here. watch.#my art
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Ep 4 :)
#I LIKE Dostoyevsky. I like how mysterious and unreadable he is. What is his goal!!!! Why does he do what he does!!!!!!! He's very cool#I think knowing his ability now REALLY adds to his character. Him being so smart so manipulative so disruptive in the way he–#seemingly kills people on touch! Only added to this impression of him being “demon” and “inhuman”#But now that we know his ability you realize... That's all his doing; no ability.#His ability in a way does help humanize him by reaffirming that except for the moment he dies– he's got no superpower at all!!!#It's just him.#And yet at the same time also solves the exact opposite role of dehumanizing him because if it's not his ability that makes him like *that*#then he's even different than other ability users!!! Then‚ if not an ability user‚ if not a non ability user: what is //he//?#It's all SO compelling!!! Also makes for an extremely insightful narrative parallel with Dazai#Not an ability user not a non ability user. Not good not evil. (I feel like Dostoyevsky does exceed the definitions of good and evil as–#much as Dazai does. If he causes evil‚ yet does so with the intention of bringing salvation to humans– is he really *simply* evil?)#Both have these borderline superpowers that make them extraordinary beings (we can call it super intelligence‚ but it goes from controlling#their own heartbit to everything else) but are unrelated to their respective abilities! Once again making them neither this or that#I find Karma's words at the end to be extremely insightful.“Ace was evil for sure‚ but this man isn't even evil.#He's a being from the beyond. A being that exceeds human limits.” Like!!! That's all that there is to it!!!!!!#Back to this chapter / episode. There's some themes / worldvies once again I don't agree with but narrative wise I think it's extraordinary#I feel like after the Guild arc the writing really matured a lot and this is a kind of preview of what the doa arc is going to be like#(aka very very well written especially if compared to the previous arcs)#The plot twists of this episode are all so unpredictable and exciting!!! I think it's remarkably witty how it takes advantages of previous–#clichés - villains always revealing details about their own ability in a way that is quite baffling - to actually surprise the audience.#It's so effective. How skillfully unpredictable Dostoyevsky is to the point you can never guess what he will do next!!!#Him killing Karma is... Idk so so soooooooo interesting. I could talk about this forever but I'm being very dispersive in the rable and–#running out of tags. The whole episode you're sorta rooting for Dostoyevsky. He's very cool and comes out charming in the way he keeps–#surprising the audience. He looks bothered by Ace's disregard of other people's lives and that makes him sympathetic too.#But then he kills Karma out of nowhere and it's an “Ah! You fell for his lies too– remember he's nothing but evil. He cares just as little#about life as Ace does”. And then??? Karma in his last words is himself so generous in his words to Dostoyevsky. It's baffling.#And it almost feels like thenarrative is once again turning around and telling you you should root for Dostoyevsky.#It's endlessly fascinating.#I have more to say about the worldviews I don't share and the art style Dostoyevsky was portrayed with this episode (love it!!)#But alas ran out of tags
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Alright gamers!!!! New dupe icons have been obtained, so now I shall!!! Share them!!!!
Very important note! These guys seem to be part of the next dlc, and as such they are likely incredibly prone to change or even to being scrapped entirely. This is just a showcase of some of the stuff I was able to find while datamining, and it should not be taken as stuff that will guaranteed be in game in the future.
Anyways! Enjoy your datamined dupes under the cut >:3
Starting with this fella, Chip!
Description: This Chip is extremely good at guessing their friends' passwords.
This one is Edwiredo
Description: This Edwiredo once rolled his eye so hard he powered himself off and on again.
This is Gizmo
Description: Gizmos love nothing more than a big juicy info dump.
This one is Steela! They're my personal favorite
Description: Steelas aren't programmed to put up with nonsense, but they do enjoy the occasional shenanigan.
I got these from the sprite sheets, so forgive the other sprite intruding on lovely Sonyar's icon
Description: Sonyars would sooner burn down the colony than read an instruction manual.
And lastly, Ulti!
Description: The only dance move this Ulti knows is The Robot.
Here's some bonus stuff I found in the files! Just got you! (Again note that this stuff is very prone to being changed or scrapped)
The new duplicants seem to be a new type of duplicant called bionic duplicants. They are a mix of organic and inorganic components, so my cyborg dupe theory does indeed seem to be correct! It seems like they have power banks and oxygen tanks that will need managed, and they seem to require oil to operate as well. As time goes on, a new material called gunk will build up in their systems, and they will need to visit something called the gunk extractor to be cleaned up. Their oxygen tanks also allow them to work in low oxygen environments, and it can be assumed that they won't need sleep, and potentially not even need food. They also seem to be able to install booster packs that increase their skills, and can come with preinstalled booster packs with some on print traits, including one that allows them to locate undiscovered geysers (which doesn't sound super useful tbh but it's still neat)
#rat rambles#oxygen not included#again I shall reiterate that this is unreleased stuff! prone to change! prone to being scrapped! dont forget that!#but! I am more interested in these guys than I thought Id be due to some of the lore that seems to be going on with them that I shall not#share yet since again its super duper prone to change and I don't want to accidentally spread misinformation by doing so#oh also there appears to be a new type of oil called phyto oil which is extracted from slime#this can also be used to oil up a bionic dupe and prrsumably for other stuff as well but I havent dug into the new buildings yet#so yeah all in all I found WAY more shit than I was expecting to find in the qol beta lol#if I were a more skilled dataminer Id see if I could piece together the actual fullbody sprites for the new dupes but Im not so I wont#Im not even sure if those components are there tbh? I didn't check woops#Ill check later it doesnt rly matter to me much rn#but yeah I assume there'll probably be lots of additional stuff in the full dlc this is just the stuff I stumbled across#Im not very good at the whole datamining thing too so Im sure I missed a Lot of new shit#but with all this stuff sitting in the files I assume we're probably going to hear some word abt the new dlc within the next few months#so look forward to that ig#excited to see what this dlc entails and I hope we get more of the jackie family drama I am digging it so hard#also calvin. calvin my boy please come home
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off coming to steam is cool + interested to see the new content but why r ppl saying off was hard to play beforehand pleaaase
#''where to play off'' into search bar and there it is#n e ways like i said very intrigued by there being new stuff in the remaster + how it'll be integrated bc theres whole new zones and bosses#and how itll change the story bc the 3 zones + guardians are like the crux of the narrative#im interested how you translate such a concise and compact story into something wider#+ mortis ghosts art style nowadays is veeeerrryy different than the one he had when off was released and from the one screen that was shown#it seems the new stuff will have that more cartoony style#so like i said itll be interesting to see how it's integrated. will it fit? will it feel super out of place?#i dunno! excited to find out though#i think the non remastered version will always have a special place with me though. i love you off#OH and im VERY interested to see if they'll change the combat at all. it seems they changed menus and such and OFF having well.#Lackluster. combat. is something ppl have talked about for forever and its genuinely a part of the games identity at this point#would an improved combat system even still feel like off? dunno!#.txt#ALSOOO it'll be really interesting how this game lands nowadays. off was very offbeat (heh) for the time it came out so im interested if#and how the narrative beats land in todays gaming landscape. a lot more games these days have 'wait are we the bad guy?'#moments so who knows if itll strike the same way it did back in fucking. 2008.#god has it really been that long...
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I've only just started chapter 3 of Gaiden but I am absolutely obsessed with the theme of powerlessness and how it's conveyed within the game.
I can't help but notice how often Kiryu says he 'doesn't have a choice' when doing pretty much anything. Even if it's in super banal, low-stakes interactions like doing something for Akame, he's constantly stating that he feels as if he has no agency in his current situation.
In the previous Kiryu Saga games, Kiryu is painfully aware of the consequences of his actions, but he still regards them as choices that he made; not something he was forced into.
His status as a Daidoji agent has basically beaten him into submission. He'll occasionally try to fight against this absolute control over him, but he's eventually returned to his position as a pawn in this huge, shadowy organization. The Daidoji are the first organization/power structure that managed to get control over Kiryu's tendency to burn shit to the ground and good god do they take advantage of that.
But then Kiryu's also painfully aware that this is the reality he asked for. Not only does he outright say this multiple times, but he's telling others that 'they started this' when they're confronting him and it's so obvious that he's talking to himself.
He's constantly bouncing between feeling miserable and powerless and then resenting these feelings and berating himself for having them in the first place. He's grasping at any sliver of control he can still have over his life, not to find meaning in his new existence, but to further punish and abuse himself.
I can't remember the exact post, but I saw someone describe Gaiden as a love letter to the Kiryu Saga and that's the best way to describe it, I think.
Kiryu's arc in his games is an incredibly slow car crash where we witness in painful detail how incapable he is of permanently leaving his life as yakuza to protect his family.
He has this almost codependent relationship with the Tojo Clan and feels a compulsive urge to get involved in the constant crises happening.
Of course, there were outside factors that were trying to pull him into these conflicts. Everyone believes that he's the only one who can fix everything. Kiryu's name carries power. Isn't it disgustingly selfish to refuse to get involved when he was the one who chose the clan's chairmen?
How could he refuse to deliver a single letter after the 5th chairman was shot right in front of him?
How could he ignore the people threatening to take his orphanage away from him and his kids?
How could he tell his daughter that she can't become an idol because of his past?
How could he justify staying alive when it did nothing but bring harm to his family?
What choice did he have?
But remember, you chose this, Kiryu.
#Ughhhhh Gaiden's so fucking good you guys.#I'm both super excited for Infinite Wealth and absolutely terrified of what's gonna happen.#I can just tell it's gonna fuck me up.#Guess we'll see how much damage Gaiden does first :')#I also find it interesting how Kashiwagi seems to be more of a parental figure in Kiryu's life than Kazama.#I'll probably write something more detailed later but Kiryu has a line at the end of the ChatGPT quest where he mentions Kashiwagi#and I thought it was interesting that he was more concerned with making Kashiwagi mad than Kazama.#Almost as if Kazama wasn't around as much as Kashiwagi.#yakuza analysis#kiryu kazuma#like a dragon gaiden spoilers#yakuza 6 spoilers#tagging is kinda weird since the Yakuza series got rebranded lol. Obviously 'Like a Dragon' fits better than 'Yakuza'#since all our protags leave the Yakuza like. Immediately.#But I feel like in a few years there's gonna be a divide between people who are new to the series and the pre-rebrand fans tagging-wise.#all us moldy oldies are gonna be using the 'Yakuza' tag while the other half of the fandom is tagging everything with 'LAD'#But it's always fun to watch fandoms evolve and change so I guess we'll see!
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Do u ever have those days where u like. Look back at ur life and ur just like. U know im really happy with my character growth arc
#im that but like???? most days now????#its really really wild what getting on the right medication can do#at least im like 90% sure this is my new med. my baseline is like...... sooooo much happier than it was before#ive only been on it for like... a month? so who knows what this looks like for me long term. but at least for now#wow#bel speaks#i could get really sappy in these notes but im not gonna lol#all i will say is that like. as someone who was super paranoid about being judged for their interests/nerdiness#it is so exhilarating to like. go to work and gush about my 4000 piece batman lego set. and everyone i told was like holy shit thats so cool#and none of these people really care about batman or legos. but i do!#and people think happiness and enthusiasm is exciting. and thell get excited with/for u#and like. holds little me's face in my hands. stop being afraid of people seeing ur excitement#me: im not gonna be sappy in the tags#me immediately after: gets sappy about legos#anyways#buy a cool lego set its good for u#and also find some meds to fix ur brain. really really good combo
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i do not need to start a new hobby i do not need to start a new hobby i do not need to start a new hobby
#help#i don't have the money for a new hobby#<- wants to get back into notebooks *again* but fell out of it in mid march when life became chaotic and my routines weren't routine anymor#i also want new books because nothing i have is catching my eye (problem)#argh#this is very specifically related to the fact that i've been so stressed#again. i feel like everything has been weird since march#and i just. can't get myself on track#which is why i've been jumping between hobbies and interests so rapidly#desperately trying to find something that feels normal#the notebooks were super helpful but i just haven't quite managed to get back in because i become overwhelmed by guilt when i try#but now that it's june i can take may out and have a fresh start? maybe? we'll see#i'm hoping the reset after my exam on wednesday with a break and papers i'm super excited for will make me feel more. normal?#i don't think i have a normal anymore tbh#not since getting sick in april#it changed *everything*#rambling in the tags is my coping mechanism
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