#I feel AWFUL

[emaiiyaru]

scribbles

[talon-dragonbeast]

today i had a realization that kinda freaked me out at first and now has me feeling incredibly sad. so i live in a pretty cold place, right? the coldest in the region actually. the town is always covered in mist and clouds, and in winter it can get so cold it snows. so, heres what i realized today:

the trees. theyre still green.

i cant explain how disturbing this seems to me. green trees in november. yesterday the maximum temperature was 19 °C, and i dont know how that translates to fahrenheit but let me tell you that its pretty fucking warm for autumn. im not even sure if its going to snow this year. thats bonkers.

as a being from nature, this has me feeling actually nauseous. like i know im not the most connected to nature guy in existence, but even i can tell when something feels off. something has gone terribly wrong here, and i dont know what to do about it. fuck.

[weenie-kun]

[dreamingofep]

Like a lot of you, I’m at a loss for words. I’m so disappointed and frustrated with the choice a huge amount of Americans made. To me, it’s disgusting and reprehensible the path the country chose to go. I couldn’t sleep all night but when I did wake up, I had a feeling in my stomach like a death just happened. I’ve never felt like that about anything political. Every part of me wants to crawl in a hole and stay there.

But I know that’s not the way to go about it. Especially when I have such a loving community such as this one. Call me too optimistic, but I think this world has so much love to offer that can drown out the hate. I think it’s more important than ever to lift each other up and be kind. The world needs kindness more than ever. Elvis was always kind and showed love and I think we need to follow that same path.

Ever since joining this fandom over two years ago, if I’ve learned anything, I’ve learned from you guys that we are all loving and supportive group of people. We share the love of Elvis and can make a grey day seem bright. I don’t think I realize I do it, but whenever I am feeling down, I always put on an Elvis song. Something about his voice makes me smile and calms my worried mind. But I also go on here to feel some joy. You all make me really happy with your love for him and see how silly we can be about things.

Always here to talk Elvis and lift you up too. I think that’s going to be extremely important from here on out. I’m sending everyone love and hugs that need it.

-S

[cantsaybiconwithouticon]

Season 6 is officially my least favorite season.

[yuppievalley]

awful

extra + insp

[adrinktostopyourthirst]

Hello my darlings! I haven’t forgotten about you and I see all of your messages in my inbox. However, my physical health is not too great at the moment and my energy mainly goes into all the basic stuff like my job and errands and other responsibilities. I have so many ideas but zero energy to type them out. I hope to have it all figured out soon, but I wanted you guys to get an update. Talk to you soon, hopefully!

[fractalkiss]

they should throw you in a mandated cave every time it's nearing that time of the month and you should be allowed to stay there until you feel more normal again

[spindleanddye]

Icelandic sheep fleece is double coated, meaning it has a rougher/tougher outer coat (aka the Tog) and a softer/finer undercoat (aka the Thel).

I was planning to spin the two coats together, as seperating them is a lot of work... but I woke up in a dark depression and the only thing that has pulled me out of it is the meditative process of seperating the tog and thel

Catch me doing this for hours.

The fiber in my left hand is the Tog and in my right is the Thel

[lettesuniverse]

it's so humiliating when you gave so much from yourself, gave them endless chances, basically tried to understand why they have been treating you like shit, because your feelings were actually real and truly loved them unconditionally just it to end abruptly, because you finally found out what they have been doing behind your back the whole time...and the worst is that you was the one who HAD TO end it, because they gave you no other choice, because it could have been the same hamster wheel and you would have ended up even more broken than now..

And the feeling that they acted like they liked you, loved you and wanted to be with you when in reality they had no intention to do so is horrible. It makes you question EVERYTHING.

[latenight-dnd]

Feeling like a big fucking stupid idiot brain moron. Therapists be like “oh set alarms so u remember tasks, it’ll cure ur adhd” but then I am cooking and I set the alarm to go turn off the stove and then the alarm goes off but I’m doing a task so I turn the alarm off and say I’ll do it after the task and BAM. Adhd strikes. I have forgotten the task, or that there ever was an alarm. My house is full of smoke.

[anonymous-dentist]

since people apparently cant be formal im going to be: we dont use "q!" cuz people kinda dont want to talk abt the server, only spiderbit/guapoduo, so they decided to use "g!" or only "!", and when people are refering to other series they use the first letter of the series for example: "c!roier", i myself dont quite get the g!/! and understand why u dont like people not using "q!" when the universe they talking abt is qsmp

(people saw u complaining abt it here and start to shit on u without any context on twt and saying u complained that q wanst appearing in other fics even tho im pretty sure i didnt when ur distancing urself from him so i wanted to be formal :])

-🎀

(also can u explain y u dont like the "g!" or "!"???)

I can try to explain myself, but I'm also kinda crying answering this because I have a hard time with emotion regulation when I'm upset (autism thing)

OKAY! SO!

I don't really mind the new tag things? Like, I don't love them, but they're fine. If people want to distance themselves, that's fine. I'm distancing myself. Anybody who's been keeping up with my blog over the past half a year or so can see that I haven't really posted about the QSMP at all since Purgatory started. I haven't talked about Quackity at all outside of that shitshow of an awards ceremony in over a month when, for several years, I was a Quackity-centric blog (2021-early 2023)

My thing with the new tags, and with the Guapoverse thing in general, is that it really just isn't accessible for a larger audience. Sure, some parts of Twitter might understand it, but what about the rest of us?

As far as I can tell, the Guapoverse originated with a Twitter artist (Moone), and it blew up overnight. And I'm overall cool with it! It's a little silly, but so is fandom. I'm a fanfiction writer. Who plays Splatoon for like 4 hours every day. I know silly, and I love it

But then, BAM, I blink and everybody's abandoned the q! and they're changing their tags on Ao3 and making everything suddenly so much harder to find, and it's all about accessibility, isn't it? Like, don't get me wrong, I love a good multiverse, but when it inadvertently excludes a significant portion of the fandom, what are we supposed to do?

Like, say I go on Twitter looking for q!Pac fanart. But now it's so much harder to find because it isn't tagged or typed that way, it's !Pac, and that includes search results from every single au that has a ! in it, like if there was an au called AU!Pac? The !Pac would be in there. But I don't want to see AU!Pac, I want to see q!Pac.

And then there's the g! thingy. Like, that's fine, but a little more widespread of an explanation would've been nice. Like, what au does g! stand for? If you don't know what Guapoverse is, like A LOT OF PEOPLE don't, what are we supposed to think your art is? If we're looking for q!Cellbit art, we aren't necessarily going to like and retweet your art if it's labeled as g!Cellbit because we don't know that he's q!Cellbit.

It's kind of similar on Ao3, only that one's a little different because you can filter by relationship. But let's say you don't know how to do that. Let's say you're new to the website and you only know how to filter by fandom, because that's the first thing you learn how to do on Ao3- it's right there at the top of the front page: Browse By Fandom.

So you go to the QSMP tag looking for fics with Spiderbit/Guapoduo in them. But, here's the thing, you can't find any. Because they aren't being tagged QSMP, they're being tagged Guapoverse now even if the fics are being set in the QSMP setting.

It's just a general lack of fandom accessibility that gets me. I understand the distancing aspect, and I've been waiting for it to happen since the Elections when he Brazilian fandom started getting IMMENSE amounts of hatred from Gringo Chats. But it gets a little tricky when you're part of a fandom as large as this one is. How are we all supposed to share content and talk about things with each other if we can't even find each other anymore?

Like! I've lost so many cool fics I forgot to bookmark because they were taken out of the QSMP tag and moved into the new one! (The new one goes against ToS btw I believe, but go talk to a tag wrangler about that.)

People on Tumblr don't know what the Guapoverse is. TikTok doesn't. Reddit doesn't. Only Twitter does, and only a section of Twitter does. Because I haven't seen any English or French-speaking Guapoduo People talk about the Guapoverse, only Portuguese or Spanish-speaking people. And I get that the exclusion isn't purposeful and that the Guapoverse is meant to sort of heal everybody from the wounds the QSMP left, but I think that maybe even just spreading the news and not... you know... sending death threats and insults and smearing people's names would be better than this.

Thank you for politely asking. I thought I had made myself clear before, but I guess I hadn't.

I'm open to answer any more questions. I can't explain myself to my critics on Twitter, but I can answer your questions here, hopefully.

[nsfwitchy2]

Hey so did you know if you get 5-6 hours of sleep, don’t eat anything except yogurt drinks and then work in the heat with no AC for 3 hours your body will start to kill you?

Anyway my hands are shaking

[tigers1o1]

The executive dysfunction + pathological demand avoidance is a ROUGH fucking combo

An external force makes me not want to do something, and then i shut down and internally I’m screaming at myself to just get up and do it, that I’m being lazy and that doing literally anything would be better than just laying here, even if its not the specific Thing i need to do. But RAH brain bad, can’t move

[soap-ify]

hi everyone! i know i have been very inactive lately. it's just life beating my ass these days in all honesty, and i have just been in a really horrible state of mind recently. i truly miss you all and this is NOT a goodbye, but i will be logging out and taking a break for myself. i don't know how long it will be, hopefully not too long :( i am sorry.

[frances-baby-houseman]

The brutal realization upon waking up that not only is my house trashed from having 18 people over for the seder on a school night, but my body is also trashed from 4 glasses of Mogen David's finest concord grape kosher wine.