#I don’t even think I’ve ever had a huge problem or anything here

[sketchraptor]

Oat milk— the gen z choice. It’s new, it’s nice, but does have a bit of an oatmeal-y flavor to it when you add it.

Almond milk— the correct choice. Typically older women, but shockingly doesn’t have nearly as much of an overtly nutty flavor as you’d expect.

Soy milk— the almond mom. Adds sweetness to the drink and has a bit of an odd flavor to it.

Coconut milk— sucks. The coconut comes through so strong, and it’s very rare this gets requested. We don’t even have it on hand.

Fat free— not common but not rare. Can’t pin down a demographic, could be a health nut who also gets sugar free syrups, or just someone who doesn’t like whole. Also see “skinny latte”.

Whole— our default milk. People are fine with it. But the few who request it are usually older as well, and always give me a dirty look when I hand them their coffee for some reason.

Half n Half/ Breve— get your bougie ass out of here. Yes it’s still an up charge, believe it or not. No I can’t just ‘give it to you’ because ‘it’s basically the same as whole’. Take your drink and fuck off.

Black/on the rocks— no cream. These people either are old old men who don’t have taste buds anymore, nurses, or simply hate themselves (sometimes these cross over).

[lonelypep]

every smash bros character ranked by how good of a cook i think they’d be.

82: piranha plant

eating this dish will kill you instantly. turns out he spit some poison in there while no one was looking. and yeah, that sucks, but if you even accepted a meal from this guy i think you have bigger problems

81: ridley.

let’s be real, if you let this guy into the kitchen, you made a huge mistake. it’s like john mulaney’s horse in a hospital sketch: you never know what he’s gonna do next. you’re too focused on getting him out.

80: king k rool.

king k rool is many things. a king, a pirate, a scientist. but he is not a cook. he’ll try, but he has literally no clue what he’s even doing in the kitchen.

79: yoshi

yoshi will give you a dish and you’ll be like “what the fuck is this” and he’ll talk about how it was made from the finest newborns of his home planet. i’m deciding to ignore it but it’s really nagging at me.

78: sonic

sonic shouldn’t be on this list. because he wouldn’t make you any food. he’ll go to the local sonic and get a burger in about 3 minutes. it sucks. disqualified.

77: pac man

what can i say. it tastes like literal plastic. i don’t even wanna know how he made it. i’ll give it back to him but the nice thing about pac man is he wouldn’t give a shit.

76: bowser jr.

fuck this guy. he rage quit at making a grilled cheese. now there’s a literal canonball in the stove. now no one else can use it!! this is what happens when you spoil kids.

75: pikachu/pichu

these two are in the same category since they’d make the same thing. they’d get store bought french fries and fry them with lighting outside. it’s consistent, it works, just not really filling. and they don’t know how to make anything else.

74. wario

don’t get me wrong: he knows what he’s doing. he’s the burger king of smash. he’s this low because the burger is the most unhealthy shit you’ll ever have. eating it gave you chronic diarrhea, gastrointestinal issues, and permanently damaged your taste buds. but god fucking damn was it a good burger.

73. hero

he gave you a single piece of bread with butter on it. it’s not bad but…really dude?

72: olimar

he didn’t make you a bad meal, in fact it was one of the best here. but that’s because he didn’t make you something. it was the pikmin and he’s trying to pass it off as his own and the pikmin don’t know because they don’t speak english. 0/10: not fucking cool dude.

71: kazuya

honestly? i don’t trust this guy. i was too intimidated to even ask his name. from what i can gather no one even invited him to the party he just showed up and made a mediocre meal. what’s weird: someone came into the kitchen and claimed this guy killed their whole family. we never saw that guy again. needless to say, kazuya wasn’t invited to the afterparty.

70: link (botw)

don’t get me wrong here, link is a five star chef. he’s just really unsanitary. apparently he cut the meat and vegetables with the same sword he killed calamity ganon with. i don’t wanna taste that guy!! have you seen him?? not to mention he pulled the meal out of his pants. i don’t even know how it fit in there.

69: inkling

she made a pancake and i thought it was good! but i absolutely can’t condone this. inkling left so much fucking weird slime and shit all over my house. and got really competitive when she heard i was getting meals from everyone else. i hope they’re all ok.

68: ROB

it was so processed. the most processed food i’ve ever had in my entire life. it’s not his fault, rob is a great guy. but this tasted like literally nothing.

67: ice climbers

when they told me they were making dessert, i trusted them. but i let someone else taste test first. my best friend was sent to the hospital because of tongue frostbite. didn’t even know that was a thing. i made the ice climbers pay for it (they’re fucking loaded)

66: villager

he made isabelle do it. and she made something great! but i’m not giving this cretin credit for having the money to afford a five star chef. you don’t deserve it because you sold a shit ton of tarantulas villager!!

65: lucario.

dude got really mad and destroyed my kitchen. he’s REALLY lucky he got the burger PERFECTLY cooked.

64: male byleth.

like this dude knows how to cook. he can barely make chicken nuggets. he has to eat in the school cafeteria simply because he never learned how to cook a simple meal. but he’s a really nice guy. total himbo. love him.

63: ryu

i asked this guy what he likes to eat. big mistake. he then went on to say that his training regiment doesn’t condone copious indulgence (his words) and he lives off of nothing but protein shakes. you do you i guess.

62-61: fox/falco

these two went into the kitchen and came out with weird alien food. i didn’t eat it but everyone else seemed to enjoy it

60: greninja

when he first came out i was so excited. he came out with the most finely sliced food i had ever seen in my entire life. but it was soooo watered down. everything tasted like celery. how do you make crab taste like celery?? how??!

59-58: simon/richter

these guys both made the same exact fish recipe, came out at the same time, and proceeded to fight each other. i didn’t get to try any 😭

57-49: every fire emblem character.

genuinely, i can’t tell these guys apart. or their food choices. honestly, my bad. i’m sure they’re good. but where do i even start.

48: sheik

she doesn’t know how to cook. she kidnapped someone else. normally i wouldn’t put someone like that this high but a. i have gender envy b. it’s for the greater good (or so she said)

47: cloud

dude made a great sandwich but he kept screaming random noises while he did. personally, i’m just glad he managed not to destroy the kitchen. that’s a first here.

46: captain falcon

he promised he’d pick up some pizza but got into a car crash on the way there. eventually he got there after the car crash was all sorted out, but got into ANOTHER on the way back. i’m honestly kind of impressed

45: steve

steve could cook an absolutely fucking KILLER meal. he’ll even offer to do it for free. but you shouldn’t let him under any circumstances. he took 13 hours gathering materials and while the wait was, arguably, worth it, i never want to experience it again. (side note: we asked captain falcon to get some pizza while waiting which led to the aforementioned entry)

44: sora

sora doesn’t know how to cook but he’s by far the biggest name at this party. everyone fucking loves him. he’s friends with GOOFY. this dude hangs out with GOOFY. this guys has hung out with GOOFY AND jack sparrow. bad food but i could listen to this guy talk for hours about his story. i’m sure i’ll understand it all.

43-40: pokémon trainer

this guys organization is fucking atrocious. if he can actually get his shit together he’ll cook up some nice vegetarian meals, but that’s a big if.

HONORABLE MENTION: sans mii gunner

sans undertale is a world renowned, famous chef. his recipes are simple, but cooked with such love, care, and finess it turns a simple cheeseburger into a masterpiece. sans undertale would easily top this list. sans mii gunner is not sans undertale. he bought the real sans’ cookbook and thinks he’s some kind of cooking genius. and sure he’s got the recipes but none of the skill to actually make it.

39-38: samus/zero suit samus

hooray! we’re out of bad cook options now. samus is a great cook, but she’s so used to her alien delicacies she doesn’t know how to cook on earth anymore. shame, but i trust her to produce something edible.

37: shulk

he is really good at the grill. unfortunately, he refused to put a shirt on and made everyone a little uncomfy. that being said, he showed me the beach boys and i had never listened to them before. so he gets points.

36-35: pit/dark pit

these guys don’t know how to cook but the flew into the sky and killed some mythical bird for everyone to eat. i couldn’t have any, i’m pescatarian, but everyone else loved it.

34: bayonnetta

she opened a portal to a waffle house and a bunch of demons came flying out. she didn’t make anything, but honestly, absolutely legendary experience that was.

33: duck hunt

you’d think a dog wouldn’t bring anything meaningful. this would be false. that is the freshest duck i’ve ever seen in my entire life. (didn’t eat it: pescatarian)

32: king dedede

he made his legendary homemade mashed potatoes. everyone loved them. so creamy… weirdly perfect. too bad i hate the monarchy. sorry bud.

31: meta knight

meta knight is a great cook and should be higher. but i don’t want him to be. because he’s so fucking pretentious. he sliced all the food in front of everyone and wouldn’t shut up about radiohead. hate this guy.

30-29: daisy/peach

these two put all their private chefs together to make something for everyone. great catering, great food, but they didn’t technically make it. love them.

28: mewtwo

as if mewtwo wouldn’t just read someone’s mind and cook something. but it’s not mewtwo’s food…so…. sorry dude you cheated.

27: dark samus

she really surprised me here. she cooked up the most exquisite alien delicacies i’ve ever tasted in my entire life. should be higher. but unfortunately, i had to get a space parasite removed from my system by regular samus. honestly though… it was worth it.

26: ganon

he was rude to everyone about his cooking skills and wouldn’t stop bragging. asshole am i right? but surprised everyone by grilling his god damn heart out. he’s a bad try hard but like go off i guess.

25: isabelle

she’s trying her absolute fucking best and she deserves the world here. amazing cook, we need to save her from the island.

24: little mac

dude went so hard. brought new york pizza ALL THE WAY FROM NEW YORK. ok, not literally, but he made a damn good pizza

23: snake

full disclosure: snake doesn’t know how to cook. also no one knows he’s an agent. but he has to cook to blend in so you BEST BELIEVE this man is going to COOK like his life depends on it.

22-20: young link, ness, and lucas

all these guys are incredibly mature for their age. surprised everyone at this party. i had deep and philosophical conversations with all of them about appreciating life. i fucking cried. oh and they made everyone sandwiches, and even took my pescatarianism into account.

19: rosalina

she brought weird space ice cream and i felt my mind expanding as i ate it. love her.

18: mr game and watch

he feels like everyone’s dad! and he’s one of those cooks who cooks in front of everyone. dude flung his meals onto everyone’s plates expertly. love him.

17: joker

originally much lower on this list, joker showed up at my house and attempted to make a grilled cheese and made the worst thing i’ve ever taste. then he said something about gru from despicable me and stood in the corner for an hour. originally i had him towards the bottom but then he doordashed five gigantic burgers, ate all of them in one sitting, and then made me an expensive curry that tasted fantastic. dude went hard.

it was at this point i realized i made a mistake with the numbers. like hell if i’m going to fix the whole thing.

22: zelda

she made some weird food but damn was it pretty to look at! crystals, magic power, i mean good vibes all around here.

21-20: pyra and mythra

i feel like i should put them here since they’re confirmed to be good cooks in the game. but between you and me, i didn’t invite them. i’d consider some entries before this to be better cooks but at this point i’ve been working on this list for 8 hours i do not wanna go back and fix things please i mean this whole list is a joke no one should take this seriously

19: banjo and kazooie

these guys can fucking cook. they’ve been living on their own for a while so it makes sense but it still surprises me. they made a really big stew and even brought free puzzle games.

18: wolf

GRILL MASTER. dude knows what he’s doing on that thing. i’ve never seen better spatula work. holy shit.

17: kirby

kirby came in with some weird blonde hair and made some FANTASTIC ribs (that i didn’t have bc i’m pescatarian). weirdly, gordon ramsey went missing the same day…. i’m sure it means nothing.

16: mario

dude made some absolutely spectacular spaghetti. but he kept talking about how great he is and it really off put some people. kinda weird dude.

15: dr mario. dude brought 50 apples to the potluck. guess he doesn’t wanna see anyone in the office. and he didn’t because we ate them all. take that.

14: min min

she brought some soup dumplings which a lot of people hadn’t had! love her. literally fantastic. she had a whole arm for cooking. that’s what we call efficient.

13: ken

he’s kenough. he is amazing at barbecue. he can cook things with his hands, juggle, also he’s just a fun presence. (i made him make fake meat burgers for me)

12: jigglypuff

she showed up with so many pastries. like so many. not only that, but they were decorative!! she put so much work into that. love her.

11: luigi

he tried to make spaghetti like his brother but a literal fucking meteor slammed into his pot and cracked it. tough luck. then he offered to pay and i refused, but went out and got me some really expensive spaghetti anyways! he’s such a nice guy!! shouldn’t be this high… but i love this guy so much. he’s trying his hardest and i respect that.

10: toon link

toon link didn’t actually make anything. but his mom came and made everyone a salad. and honestly! his mom is some great company. she had so many interesting stories about his childhood. honestly she added so much to the function

9: terry

he is the BARBECUE MASTER!!!! literally what the hell how is he so good! everyone at the party kinda stereotyped him but he’s really really progressive with his views which you wouldn’t think for a big barbecue muscle guy in a baseball cap but everyone loved this guy.

8: mega man

the MASTER CHEF!! literally. he was on master chef. he uses thin round blades to slice vegetables, heats things perfectly, has an instance knowledge of spices, just damn. this guy knows what he’s doing.

7-6: bowser and donkey kong

common misconception: everyone thinks these two would have no idea how to cook. but these are FAMILY GUYS HERE!! they’re providing for absolutely gigantic families, these fuckers know how to make a sandwich and they did. initially they started off making separate sandwiches but they have a really similar recipe and decided to work together. and i really respect that. also turns out peach is just bowser’s kids’ babysitter.

5: palutena.

everyone expected her to show up with some absolutely mystical food. naturally, she showed up with the literal ambrosia of the gods. holy shit. unfortunately, she didn’t put as much effort into it as she could’ve.

4: sephiroth.

ok this guy didn’t really cook anything amazing. but his sheer fucking commitment to the vibe is literally legendary. this man has a long as sword he cut 10 veggies at a time with. he heat them with magic world ending fire. when he was done in the kitchen he surrounded himself with fire and gazed menacingly at me. his sheer commitment to the edge lord aesthetic is truly exemplary.

3: incineroar.

THE GRILLING GOAT!! this man is a grill master. he was prepared to grill ANYTHING. and i mean anything. fish, veggies, meat, fucking grilled cheese. love this guy.

2: wii fit trainer

she made the most well balanced and healthy salad i’ve ever had. and she made it taste extraordinary. she can be a little intense about fitness but i’ve never had a healthier meal in my life. it immediately lowered my extremely high cholesterol.

1. diddy kong

he’s about ten. he made you a pb&j. he had homework to do, but he made you a pb&j. he didn’t have to. he wasn’t asked to. he just wanted to make you a pb&j. he could’ve done anything else but he made you a pb&j. what heartless monster wouldn’t accept it.

[dreamwatch]

Turn The Page

Written for @corrodedcoffinfest

Day #30 - Prompt: Fame and Fortune | Word Count: 1000 | Rating: T | CW: implied alcoholism | POV: Steve | Pairing: Steddie | Tags: mild angst with a happy ending, future fic, they’re in love your honour, Eddie’s over it

Again, another iPad entry so hopefully no typos but… who knows!

The moment Eddie gets off the stage Steve knows something is wrong.

The twenty-first had been hard, a day of press, of meet and greets, of things Steve asked Eddie to cancel. ‘It’s easier to just do it’; it’s not though. It never fucking is. The press and the fans get a Diet Eddie, and Steve ends up with an angry drunk in his bedroom. But they power through it. They always do.

 Steve goes to special shows now, wouldn’t have come to this one but it’s the twenty-seventh, and what’s more special than knowing your boyfriend is still alive?

Eddie practically throws his guitar at his tech as he rushes off stage, rushing past everyone, Steve included.

“Eddie?” he calls out.

The rest of the band get off the stage. “Eddie!” Jeff shouts from behind him. “The encore!”

But he’s gone, down the labyrinth of hallways, the crowd still cheering for more.

He doesn’t shower, doesn’t grab his shit from the dressing room, just walks out of the back of the venue to their car,  Steve running behind him. The car isn’t ready, they’re not expecting him for another thirty minutes at least, and it’s a confused mess of security and crew, frantic radio messages.

“Eddie, what the fuck is going on?” Steve asks, taking him by the elbow. He gets a tight head shake as a reply.

The car ride is silent, the smell of cooling sweat blending with the air con blowing full blast at them, and when they get to their hotel room, Eddie heads straight to the phone.

“Hi, can I get room service to the Junior Suite?”

Steve just gawps, he feels like he’s losing his fucking mind.

 “Uh… can I get… do you have pineapple? I’d really like some pineapple actually. And a bottle of champagne… whatever you think is best, oh and hold on,” he says covering the mouthpiece with his hand. “Do you want anything?” 

He sounds manic, so off, so not his usual self. Wild in a crazed way, and it’s scaring Steve. He stands in the entranceway, mouth hanging open.

“Yeah, I want to know what the fuck is going on?”

Eddie blinks.

“And a cheese burger and fries.”

He hangs up and finally peels his t-shirt off, letting it drop to the floor as he walks to the bathroom to shower. The phone keeps ringing, Jeff asking what the hell is going on, their manager, Phil, screaming at him. Eddie wanders in, towel around his waist, another wrapped around his hair. He doesn’t even stop to ask who Steve’s talking to, just gently takes the handset from his hands, places it back on the phone.

The room service arrives and Eddie leads Steve to the dining table, tells him to sit and eat, and then he takes a huge piece of pineapple with him to the bed.

The phone rings again, and this time Eddie rips the cord from the wall.

“Ed, you have got to talk to me.”

“I will. Just let me eat this first. Eat your burger.” 

As if he could.

Eddie sits on the edge of the bed half naked, eating pineapple. Steve’s watched them trash rooms before, true idiot behaviour, but this is probably the weirdest fucking thing he’s ever seen.

There’s banging on the door, Steve can hear Gareth’s voice, then Phil’s again, it’s after midnight now. Eventually they go away.

“You know,” Eddie says breaking the silence. “I don’t think I’ve enjoyed anything in the last few years as much as I enjoyed that fucking pineapple.” He frowns at the half eaten fruit platter, like he’s trying to solve a math problem. 

Steve crouches in down in front of him, his hands gripping Eddie’s knees.

“Bambi, please, what the fuck is going on? I mean, do I need to call a doctor here…? You’re scaring me.”

Eddie looks at him like he’s water on a hot day. 

“What if I said let’s run away? I’ll quit the band, we’ll buy a ranch or a farm. Get out of LA.” His eyes meet Steve’s properly for the first time since he got off stage. “What would you say?”

“I’d say give me ten minutes to pack.”

“Really?”

“Really. Where’s this coming from?”

“I died twenty years ago. And I got a second chance and I took it, you know. We’ve done amazing things. But it’s not fun anymore. It hasn’t been fun for a long time. And life’s too short for that, it’s too short for me to waste it being miserable. And I am. I’m a thing, I’m a commodity. I go where I’m told, I turn up, do my thing. I don’t remember the names of the towns I’m in, I always thought that was a joke you know? It’s not. It’s real.” He laughs, but it’s shallow, his eyes flat. “Who fucking knew?”

Steve gets off the floor and sits beside Eddie on the bed. “Are you serious?”

Eddie doesn’t answer straight away, but when he eventually looks at Steve he nods, and for the first time that day, Steve realises, he smiles. “Yeah. Yeah I’m serious.”

“I hate that you felt this way and didn’t tell me.”

Eddie takes his hand, threads his fingers through, locking them together.

“I didn’t want to worry you.”

This stupid, beautiful man. His everything. His life.

“And the band?”

Eddie shrugs. “They’ll be fine. They’ll get another guitarist no problem. People would kill to join them.”

Steve reaches for Eddie, lays his palm against his cheek, trails his thumb along the silvery thread that runs all the way to his throat, a memory woven on his face. It scares him how close they were to not having this, hits him sometimes out of nowhere. He leans in, his lips meeting Eddie’s, tastes pineapple, tastes home. He wouldn’t deny this man a single thing.

“Alright then,” says Steve says, breaking the kiss with a smile. “I guess we’re going shopping for a ranch.”

[imaginefan]

This Changes Things

Jeremy Gilbert X Fem!Reader

Word Count: 1013

Requested: Anon

Request: When you have a chance could you write a one shot where reader moves into the Gilbert house and she's always had a huge crush on Jeremy? The 2 would get along but then when reader moves in she distances herself from him the best she can and Jeremy is upset about it; the 2 argue about it. -(Not sure where else to go with this), reader knows about supernatural, no one's knows of her crush but Stefan picks up on it. [,thank you!!!

Moving in with the Gilberts was the only decision that seemed logical. You met them when you were younger, you were the same age as Jeremy and became fast friends. You hung out together and he even made sure to keep his more destructive tendencies away from you. You had to move in with them after your parents decided that they wanted to move closer to family which meant leaving Mystic Falls, something you didn’t want to do.

It didn’t take much convincing, your parents had known the two Gilberts for a long while and had no reason not to trust them, not to mention Alaric would be there the whole time… Or so they thought. The true reason that you didn’t want to leave but would not protest your parents decision for themselves was the supernatural world that you found yourself involved in. You loved all of your friends and had no intention of leaving them to deal with this problem by themselves so you were so happy when they said that you could stay with the Gilberts, however there was one thing that you had failed to think about.

For the first few weeks it was fine, like having the best sleepover of your life, movie nights every night, falling asleep on the sofa with Jeremy, to wake up and watch him playing whatever game he had decided to play that morning before making breakfast or going out to get something. The more you did that though, the more it felt like you were dating more than you were friends.

This was where the distancing started, you spent a lot more time in your room or just out of the house. Jeremy noticed quickly and honestly quickly annoyed him, it annoyed him enough that you found him in your room when you came home one night “Hey… What are you doing in here?” You asked.

“Waiting for you.” He answered.

“Me?” You asked.

“Yeah, it’s still early, you want to watch a movie?” He asked.

“Actually I’m really tired. I was going to have an early night.” You answered scratching the back of your head as you tried to focus on anything else.

“Are you ever going to stop lying to me?” He asked.

“What are you talking about?” You asked.

“You’ve been avoiding me.” Jeremy stood from where he was standing moving himself into your line of sight.

“I’m not avoiding you, I’ve been busy.” You answered.

“Mm.” Jeremy hummed. “So you're not done.” 

“Done?” You asked, your eyes finally finding him, he was angry. “You’re not done lying.” He didn’t even give you a chance to answer him, he left the room, you didn’t even know what to say to him, what you were hiding will ruin what you had but it seemed hiding it had done the same.

Jeremy walked into the kitchen where he started looking through the fridge, he needed something to distract himself and eating seemed to be the choice “are you really going to leave it like that?” Stefan’s voice made him jump his grip on the door, tightening in surprise before relaxing on recognition.

“What are you talking about?” Jeremy asked.

“You like her right, that’s why this bothers you so much.” Stefan said leaning against the door of the kitchen.

“Doesn’t matter, she clearly doesn’t feel the same way.” Jeremy waved him off.

“I don’t think that’s true.” Jeremy rolled his eyes tired of people talking to him like he knew nothing.

“How would you know that?” He turned to look at Stefan who had what looked like a knowing smile on his face.

“Well you were both very close.” Stefan said “almost inseparable, there were some people who thought that you were dating.” 

“So?” Jeremy asked.

“So what if she started to like the way that felt but worried that you didn’t feel the same, you hadn’t shown her that you did anyway, so to preserve a friendship she distanced herself.” Stefan explained.

“It didn’t preserve anything.” Jeremy argued.

“But there’s still time to change it, if you tell her how you feel or show her.” Stefan suggested “and even if I’m wrong, is it worth losing a friend like her over something like this?”

It only took Jeremy maybe 10 minutes to decide that Stefan might have been right and that he needed to talk to you about everything, he walked up the stairs and that was when he heard it, you were crying, he managed to get to the door in seconds not bothering to knock before opening to door “(Y/N) what’s wrong?” He asked crouching in front of you.

“Jeremy?” You asked.

“Yeah, I’m here, what happened? Why are you crying?” He asked.

“I’m sorry, I never meant to make you hate me, I thought this would be easier but it just made everything worse.” You explained and he took your face in his hands and made him look at you.

“I don’t hate you.” He said pulling you into a hug tightly wrapping his arms around you as if he could protect you from anything that could cause you harm.

“Y-you don’t?” You asked.

“I was confused and hurt because I thought that we could be more than just friends but you seemed to want something different.” He felt you gasp.

“Something more?” Soft if you weren’t the only ones in the room he probably wouldn’t have heard you.

“If you don’t want that, it doesn’t matter but I need you to understand that I could never hate you.” He promised and you seemed to relax into him.

“Something more would be nice.” You said and his grip tightened on you.

“Then we can try that.” He promised, pressing a kiss to the top of your head. “So what do you think about that movie?”

“I’d like to watch a movie.” You answered.

“Let’s go choose one.” He easily lifted you carrying you towards the stairs leading to the living room, he’d have to thank Stefan later but for now he had you to worry about.

Requests and general question!

[wolfertinger]

I have been really thinking a lot about everything as all of this Wis stuff is going down. And I’m just perplexed by her inclination at every move to demonize Sawyer when Sawyer has always been simply REACTING to Wis’s outbursts and the situations in front of them. However Mari would always project her insecurities onto Wis, Sawyer calling her out on this as seen in a screenshot posted here. Even with this Wis insists on protecting her, a literal rapist.

I am coming as a former friend of Mari, we had became friends in 2023 if I remember correctly Via Sawyer. Me and Sawyer have been friends for YEARS(2017) I know them very well, we lost contact for a bit but gladly able to find eachother again.

Something about Mari that simply Wis chooses to ignore is the fact she’s a HUGE Salem / Puppychan orbiter and has been for years. And she constantly tried to get Sawyer and Salem to be friends acting as if she were a peacemaker. By doing this it constantly undermined Sawyer’s comfortability and problems with Salem for keeping contact with Torin and LYING.

Mari by forcing a friendship between the three of them in itself shows you her character. To be quite frank, I don’t care if my gf’s ex is someone I had idolized, just the fact they’re broken up and have good reason to not talk to their ex anymore is ENOUGH for me. But Mari doesn’t hold much consideration for anyone but herself.

As Mari continuously did this making Sawyer uncomfortable, she held no regard to anyone but herself. She wanted to befriend Salem, She didn’t want to loose Salem, even if it made her partner upset. Even calling Salem cutting contact with her “almost like a breakup”. This was said during a call we had that night as she messaged me but was very rude to me for some reason because I was saying things she did not like??? Keep in mind I was at work closing a drive thru by myself, she was aware of this too.

I’m not sure why Wis has this narrative that Sawyer bad Sawyer evil Sawyer stalker when I’ve only ever seen her tweak on the internet about them. Mari was the one concerned about Salem, even making an alt to comment on a vent he made on cohost because she wanted to be friends with him still.

Mari has always been the one concerned with Salem and always was watching even going to him and Wis after the breakup crying wolf. Why is that your first thought, to plead sympathy from an ex of ur current ex and their current partner. Who you said you thought was so ugly bla bla bla, projecting your internalized transphobia on how a trans person should look onto her.

That is more in line with stalker behavior than anything Sawyer has ever done. And to be really honest as I write this it’s almost funny how Wis has like this self importance in the narrative. Mari never wanted to really be friends with Wis, only Salem. Cat had no concrete opinion on Wis, the issue lied between Sawyer and Salem. Wis really has nothing to do with any of this, yea protect your partner but you have insane self importance if you think you’re the one anyone is worried about let alone stalking ??

Yet Wis has her own narrative of events, kinda admire her ability to lie so much and pretend she hasn’t admitted and posted herself scrolling on Sawyer’s page. It’s really weird how much she deflects simply because she just really wants Sawyer to be a bad guy in this situation.

It’s just really bizarre, and reading everything on this page made me really see an extreme version of Mari on Wis. They both love to deflect things they have done onto their enemy of the week. They claim to take accountability but when nobody gives them easy forgiveness it’s “FUCK YOU, YOU ARE EVIL YOU HURT ME”. They parallel each other extremely. I don’t understand how you can live life like this not wanting to change for yourself or the better, instead

I can go on about how Mari was not a good friend to have, as there were many situations she had expected me to be emotionally available for her despite me going through a really hard time in my life as me and current gf were having one of the worst years of our lives and had split for a very long time. Mari knew this too, this was no secret.

Sawyer has always been a very blunt and honest person. I never understood why Wis is on this tirade of how they are dishonest. As no matter what Sawyer has kept it real with me, never hiding anything from me. They don’t expect me to formulate an opinion that aligns with them, they give me the facts and I bounce off what I see. We have a very open and honest friendship, there is nothing I wouldn’t say to them I don’t fear anything.

Apologies for the literal novel, I just feel like I needed to say my piece as I have a perceptive that hasn’t been brought up. I don’t engage in stuff like this often, I have nothing to gain from this at all as my online presence is kinda dead as I work and go to school full time.

i have some screens I attached validating the aggressiveness from Mari and harping over Salem cutting her off not worried about her partner being upset and hurt by this only what she felt about it. Most of what she told me was during calls.

.

[spencerreidsbookfairy]

SET UP.

famous!readers back you guys and its angstier than ever.

Okay so I skipped dinner.

I physically couldn’t handle the expected awkwardness 

I lied and told him my manager needed to to talk me and it was urgent

He's a profiler you dumb bitch

Part of me feels bad, but it’s not like I don’t want to make amends with him and his team; it’s just that ever since I was a little girl, I’ve struggled with confrontation, and it’s followed me into adulthood. I know avoiding the issue won’t make it go away, and I’m fully aware that he probably sees right through my excuse. Still, the thought of facing him and his team, of having to explain myself and potentially deal with their disappointment, feels like too much to handle right now. It’s frustrating to be so paralyzed by something as simple as a conversation, but I’m hoping that with time and a bit of courage, I can find a way to address it.

Adding to my anxiety about confronting them is the lingering sting of how they treated me behind my back. I’d overheard them making fun of my singing and mocking my songs, which felt like a punch to the gut. It wasn’t just the hurtful comments but the sense of betrayal from a group I had hoped would be supportive. The thought of facing them now feels like stepping into a hostile environment, where every word and gesture might be laced with judgment or ridicule. This makes my reluctance to confront the situation even more overwhelming, as the fear of being dismissed or belittled looms large.

On top of everything, I already feel incredibly insecure about being around Spencer’s team. Here I am, a singer trying to make a name for myself, while they’re FBI profilers, experts in their field, and it’s hard not to feel like my career is a joke in comparison. The stark contrast between our worlds—my creative, emotionally driven profession versus their analytical, high-stakes work—makes me question if I even belong in their presence. Every interaction feels like an unspoken judgment of my career choice, amplifying my insecurities and making me doubt whether my passion for music is taken seriously or just seen as a frivolous hobby in their eyes.

I then decide to go out to a party to self soothe God knows i need it, seeing all my friends 

Bella, gigi and ariana all my friends making it their duty to make me feel better about my current situationship

I then see a blonde, gorgeous woman walk into the club 

Its lila archer

No.

No.

Lila always secretly resented me, for what reason i'm not sure, but one thing i do know is that i'm not the problem lilas notorious for being a huge bitch to almost everyone she comes in contact with. Her fame getting to head 24/7 I truly want someone to shoot me if i ever turn out to be like her, so rude so dismissive so-

Wait whys she walking over here? Was i talking out loud???? 

“y/nnnnnnn???’’ she dreadfully drags out. ‘’ what are you doing here, everyone else told me youve been at home moping over a guy” voice FILLED with mockery terribly trying to be hidden with concern 

I finally get the courage to say something.

“ wow words get around fast i guess”

“ im here for you you know, if you ever need advice, like beauty advice, or just friend advice”

Oh. 

I already feel immensely insecure around her. her gorgeous eyes, body face, dating history

Before i can say anything back she chirps up and says

‘’ what is his name anyways? Wont spill the beans, promise.”

“Spencer.”

‘’ wow so I don't get a last name” she says and laughs, " that poisonous laugh will kill me one day.

‘“Reid.’’

I can see the knowing smirk forming on her face and i'm confused on whats humorous about his name

‘’ oh my god, you mean FBI spencer reid, that dirty dog just can’t get enough of the public eye girls can he, he sure does have a mouth on him though.’’

Fuck. my. Life. 

He said i was his  first girlfriend,

Im hyperventilating internally 

‘’ maybe you're thinking of someone else lila, spencer said i'm his first girlfriend”

‘’ Oh you probably are, we still had fun though, he saved my life. Of course I'd reward him for it.”

I swear the music in the club stopped when she said that

‘’ excuse me.’’

I say as i quickly power walk out the nightclub and into my car to go home

You might be asking why i'm freaking out so bad

Spencer told me we were each others first time.

I gave him my virginity thinking it was his first time too.

He lied.

He lied.

He lied.

[anzulvr]

hii could i please request a little hurt/comfort drabble where reader feels sad during christmas season but forces herself to at least pretend to be happy because karma’s birthday is on christmas day :( but karma notices how her smile doesn’t meet her eyes and stuff and asks reader about it!

Summary: You’re sad on Christmas, Karma x reader (except it’s his birthday.) hurt/comfort GN!reader HUGE SPOILER WARNING FOR ASSASSINATION CLASSROOM

(this is so cute I LOVE THIS REQUEST thank u! Had this in my drafts for a while but waited for Christmas to post)

It had been two years since everything ended. Two years since Korosensei died and all of End class were labeled as victims with some weird-Stockholm attachment to the monster who blew up the moon.

It was strange, seeing everyone care about you when you didn’t need it and remembering how low they thought of you when you were only the reject class of kunugigaoka.

A lot happened in two years, not a long time but considering how quickly everything was moving you hadn’t had time to catch up. Like any special day Christmas wasn’t a good time anymore- something your classmates agreed on. With the impact Korosensei had on your lives it was impossible to celebrate anything without wondering what would have been if you managed to save him. That was only wishful thinking, you couldn’t change the past.

Regardless, today you tried to keep a smile on your face. It was the most important time of the year, Karmas birthday- and Christmas too.

You stared at your poor attempt to decorate the cake you baked with Karma, the frosting written birthday note was almost illegible.

“What’s with the look, you’re writing isn’t that bad.”

You looked up after hearing Karmas voice as if you were pulled out of a trance.

“What look? I know it’s not that bad I was admiring our hard work.”

“More like my hard work, you kept dropping everything! Seriously though, what’s wrong? The whole day I’ve been catching you teary eyed.”

You turned your back to the counter to face him as you set the frosting bag down “I’m fine, today’s your day I’m not going to bother you with my problems. You should enjoy everything to its fullest.”

“I’m not going to enjoy anything if you’re not happy, ‘m not budging tell me why you’re upset.”

Karma was stubborn, you knew him well enough to realized this wasn’t negotiable.

“I don’t know… I was just thinking about how Korosensei can’t spend Christmas with us, and he can’t be here for your birthday. Ever since we killed him, Ive felt so helpless? Like we never did enough.”

He nodded slowly breaking eye contact for a second, “my parents haven’t answered my call today, they’re in Italy right now, all I got was a text saying they were busy and that they’d talk later. I know they haven’t forgotten, it’s kind of impossible when it’s Christmas but still- I hoped they would have time for me today, I know they have more important things to do but It made me think about how Korosensei would’ve been here.”

you nodded in response, “They could still call the days not over… and if they don’t they’ll try to make it up to you…” You could bet they wouldn’t call until the next day but you wanted to reassure him, there wasn’t a lot you could say in this situation that would make him feel better.

“It’s fine, you’re here- and you’re the best company, I had fun today. I just meant Korosensei has done a lot for us he’s proud we pulled that off, he wouldn’t want you to beat yourself up over it.”

“I know you’re right, still I wish I could’ve done more, we should’ve tried harder to save him.”

“We did what we had to. I miss him too, there’s a lot of things I could never repay Korosensei for—”

“Like getting you through senioritis? Or always bringing money in his wallet even though he knew you’d steal it?”

“I meant setting us up together, but sure those were good too.” Karma smiles breaking tenseness of the conversation for moment, “at the time I thought he was being a hassle but without him im not sure id have you right now.”

Suddenly you felt shy laughing it off and covering your face for a moment while you composed yourself, “Yeah he did push for us a lot but I was obsessed with you far before we even ended up in 3-E so you would’ve had me regardless.”

“Yeah? Tell me more.”

“No way in hell, I don’t trust you to not make fun of me. Anyways I didn’t mean to bring up something depressing, we should be smearing cake all over your face right now.”

“Try all you want but it isn’t possible to mess up my face.”

“Wanna bet?” You shake the smile off your face.

“See that’s more I like it, we can enjoy our ugly cake now. And more importantly you can open your gift.”

“What do you mean my gift? It’s your birthday you’re not supposed to buy me stuff!”

“It’s also Christmas … I couldn’t help myself I really wanted to get you something.”

“But now I’m worried my gift won’t live up to yours!”

“[Name] you could give me rocks for all I care and I’d keep them in a safe with multiple locks.”

You gently shoved his shoulder suppressing your laughter, you leaned in to kiss him.

It was impossible to not feel better with him around. This morning you had woken up wishing time could stop for a moment and you ended the day hoping for the same thing but for a completely different reason.

[tmntxthings]

Can i please hsc or oneshot angst for raph (2018)

∑一Change・゜・。

author’s notes: O.o angst you say? I saw this tiktok and the sound made me so sad!! SO INSPIRATION!

warnings: hurt / no comfort, angst, short, drabble, unedited

—————————————————————————

Raph thought, that as long as he tried his best, things would work out.

It seemed simple enough. And in most cases, his best got things done. When it came to his family, he was able to keep his brothers out of trouble for the most part. He was able to provide for them. To distract them from the many problems that surrounded their home as well as stepping up when Dad couldn’t.

It got easier with time. And Dad healed, he became a parent again. Raph didn’t have the same responsibilities that he felt only he could shoulder. But still, it was hard to change those habits. Always feeling the need to carry the burdens. To be the one to fix things.

Communication is always key. Raph learned the hard way that bottling up his emotions only led to having a huge blow up later on. So he did his best when it came to his relationship with you. He didn’t want to be the reason things fell apart between the two of you.

So he did his best.

But as he watched you turn to leave, without even trying to talk to him about what was wrong. He didn’t know what to think. It had to be him. Something had to be wrong with him.

“Y/n!”

He called out to you. But you only shook your head and continued walking further away.

So he went after you. “Can’t we talk about this?” He called after you. His snaggletooth digging into his lower lip nervously as you continued to ignore him.

Slipping past your form before you could reach the ladder that led to the manhole cover. His body a blockade though it wasn’t his intentions to force you to stay. He just wanted to talk to you!

“Please,” he pleaded. “Just tell me what I have to do.” His hand went out, reaching for your own. He couldn’t help himself but try to find any sense of comfort in this moment. He liked your touch. You were warm. You had always been a safe place for him. For his feelings. Even if you were angry with him. “Tell me what I need to change, and Raph will change.”

It would be just that easy for him. He would do anything you wanted. He could be different. Whatever you didn’t like he’d change it. Whatever it was that he did to upset you, he’d make sure it wouldn’t happen again.

“…Raph” you said in a solemn tone, tugging your hand away from his hold.

His heart broke. He didn’t reach for you again. But he went down on his knees before you. Making himself smaller. He needed to be smaller.

“No no, Y/n! You make me happy, we make each other happy!” Raph said with absolute certainty. But as your face met his, it was the epitome of hopelessness. “Don’t we?” He cried out in despair. Not understanding. Needing you to spell it out for him. He wasn’t smart enough to figure it out on his own. He wasn’t like Donnie. He wasn’t like Leo.

“I thought-“ your voice broke, the back of your hand going up to cover it as you held back a sudden sob. It was all Raph could do to stay still. To not instantly scoop you into his arms and hold you close. To calm you down and tell you that everything would be okay. He’d fix it. But he stayed in his place as you recovered yourself.

“I thought this could work. When we were young and stupid, but Raph… I’m human and you’re..” the hand covering your mouth went down as it gestured towards Raph’s form. Mutant. Was the word that went unsaid. He was other. He wasn’t human. But he hadn’t thought… you hadn’t seemed to mind…

In those quiet moments where it was just you and him. When you would lean closer than friends would get. How you would constantly text him.

“I just don’t think it’ll work Raph. It was nice to pretend. It was nice to dream. But I’ve got to be realistic. I can’t spend my life down here.”

In the sewers. In the shadows. Raph didn’t want that for you either. Maybe he had been too selfish. For ever thinking that the happiness the two of you shared was something that couldn’t be broken. He had thought his bond with you was so strong.

Slowly, Raph got up from his knees. He shuffled away from the ladder. “Oh,” was all he could say in response. He felt… how did he feel? It was hard to describe. But you didn’t hesitate to linger. You started to climb.

It seemed like this wasn’t something he could fix. He looked down at his hands. Big rough maws. Green. Not to mention the claws. Nothing like a humans. Nothing like yours. His hand closed into a fist as the manhole cover closed overhead.

He was disappointed. That was what he felt. Crazily enough, it was because he couldn’t change for you. Even though he desperately wanted to.

[casanovawrites]

random sentence prompts  ━ from various tv shows, part 9

don’t look back. remember? this is all we need.

if we kiss, you’ll be healed.

it’s not real. you just need someone to save.

could you at least wait until i’m gone?

everyone’s scared of something.

words just kind of fall out of my mouth sometimes.

it’s hot, sexy, heroic.

i took the blame to protect you.

this whole time, i’ve been trying to prove myself. prove that i belong. that i’m tough enough, strong enough. 

i care about you so much, but it just doesn’t feel the same as it used to.

by the way, now would be an excellent time to have a reliable therapist.

if even one person sees you, you don’t count as invisible anymore.

i give, like, a huge fuck. i give the biggest fuck.

i know we’re family.

i’m actually dealing with life or death things right now.

do you think i wanna be like this?

i suffer from anxiety and dread.

you have no idea what i’ve given up to protect you.

i will never find a new you.

i’d give you anything, because i love you.

if you’re in that much of a hurry to fucking die, you should just go and do it.

the second we stop looking for answers, that’s when we lose. 

we could’ve died. there’s no way we could’ve survived that.

i don’t wanna find out who i am without you.

we could be anywhere, i mean we could be here, we could be there, we could be anywhere in the world, but it would not matter, because you are my home. and i would really like to be yours.

you’re pretty when you smile.

maybe nothing’s ever gone.

i have to remind myself to breathe sometimes.

who doesn’t want easy? who doesn’t want to just fucking be okay?

i’ve never been more scared before. i’ve also never felt more alive.

being ready and being nervous aren’t mutually exclusive.

i respect you. you don’t take shit from anyone, including me. which is very cool.

i didn’t think you’d be the type to be into sharing your feelings.

when we had sex, it didn’t mean anything. it was a mistake.

a final girl must have a high threshold for pain.

i lost my mind for a couple of days. it just felt good to have a distraction. 

whenever i see some filth, i think of you.

the universe decided to drop a reminder of my greatest failure on my doorstep.

always focusing on someone else’s problem makes it easier to ignore your own.

i always knew that there was a part of you that i could never touch.

the best that i could do was love you and hope that that was enough to keep you here.

i’ve only ever done my best to save lives.

do not talk to me about pain.

it’s broken. i’m broken. and i can’t fix it.

you said we were a family. you lied. 

i’d play the hero ten times over if it meant being here with all of you.

so, as it turns out, my life is wherever you are.

try to concentrate on everything you have waiting for you when you get out of here.

you have someone waiting for you. i do not.

yeah i fucked up, but i did it my way.

it’s real, and i’m fucking terrified.

i’m doing way worse than sending nudes.

i can just radically accept that my mom is a cunt.

i’m like obsessed with being cool and popular. it’s fucking pathetic.

i think shitty things keep happening because i’ve been a self-centered asshole.

she’s mean to me. am i into that?

you’re just jealous because someone actually loves me.

i’ve never been this close to someone i’m not hooking up with. i just have a fucked up sense of intimacy.

you always make loving me seem like the easiest thing in the world.

it’s exhausting to lose a loved one.

she’s really great. she’s so great it scares the shit out of me.

am i being shitty? i don’t wanna be shitty.

being back in that house just reminds me i’ve always felt really, really lonely here.

talking about you ain’t making it about you.

everyone stares at me. i’m famous.

we don’t really have a great relationship just ‘cause of the whole ‘dead’ thing.

i don’t wanna be here anymore. i wanna be where you are.

so you’re mad at me for pushing you to be better?

i wanted to be here with you, ‘cause you’re in my head.

your superpower is that you’re shameless.

it’s not the end of the world. it’s just the beginning.

i know you. you’re already making decisions out of fear.

you said you needed me.

i wanted to do it with you.

so you’re willing to lose me, too?

i uprooted my entire life for you. i put you first because i care about you. i can’t believe you won’t do that for me. you’ll never do that for me.

bullshit, you’re lonely all the fucking time. you’re gonna die that way, too.

i guess all the time i feel kind of trapped because i can’t describe how i’m feeling.

[sombersummerskies]

A Sage's Regret: Chapter 8

Chapter 8: The Water Temple

Word Count: 4894

CW: Violence, injury

Want all the chapters? -> Masterlist

~~~ <> ~~~

Traveling through the water temple gives you an odd sense of nostalgia. The grand architecture, the ancient technology, and the intricate puzzles. It was impossible not to be reminded of your time in the Divine Beasts, solving the mysteries and secrets of the machines. Of course, it wasn’t entirely the same. This time you had soldier constructs to fend off and Zonai devices that would react to your arm. Rather than gloom you had poisonous much that needed to be avoided.

And this time you had a companion fighting alongside you.

Sidon’s assistance was immediately a huge aid to you, even if you might not have wanted to say it aloud. With all the internal battles of emotion you were having, you almost thought it would have been easy to trudge through the temple alone. But you knew better than that, and you knew that it would be foolish to turn him away now- after how far you’d already come. Besides, with the strange voice that had called out to him and referred to him as ‘kin’ you knew that he was integral to solving the problem here at the wellspring.

Together you discover that to activate the other four water vessels that you must activate a series of cogs- rather, they resemble water wheels more than anything. 

The first of these is hidden behind a wall of raging flames, but with the shield of water that the prince is able to grant you you’re able to run through without injury. On the other side you find a switch that deactivates the fire, allowing Sidon to join you. Using your right arm you manipulate several hoverstones: Zonai devices that can suspend themselves in the air using the energy from your battery cells. Using these stones you find an orb that solves the puzzle, granting you access to the first water wheel.

When you both return to the main area you see that two of the five water jugs are now pouring over with fresh water.

“Well, it’s progress,” you hum, pulling an apple out of your travel pack. You were beginning to feel famished, but the last thing you wanted to do was pause to cook a meal.

“Indeed,” the prince replies, momentarily glancing your way as you take a bite of the fruit. If he too was hungry he didn’t make note of it. Instead, he turns to look out across the land, peering down at the surface below. “I wonder… what is it like down there right now? Across all of Hyrule. You’ve informed me about the new threats of monsters, of course, but what of the people? What of the other towns? How are they faring under these new circumstances we find ourselves in?”

You pause, thinking before you answer. The truth was that you weren’t sure, it felt as though you’d been traveling at a breakneck pace ever since arriving on the surface. Far too focused on aiding others and locating the princess. 

“I… I don’t know,” you mutter after a moment’s quiet, “well. Lookout Landing is fine. If anything, they’re more fortified now than ever. But Purah informed me that Zora’s Domain, along with the three other major settlements, are all facing unnatural phenomena that have put the people at risk. And I don’t even know what might be happening in Kakariko or Hateno or even Lurelin… everything’s happening so fast… I’m just trying to get everywhere. To help everyone… you know?”

Sidon nods, “I understand completely. I’ve rarely afforded myself a moment's rest ever since the Upheaval. Far too many Zora depend on me… far too many lives hang in the balance…”

His voice wavers, and you know exactly who he’s thinking of. His father. You can picture King Dorephan in your mind so clearly, still unsettled by seeing him so sickly and pale on that throne within the sanctum.

You try to change the subject. After momentarily digging through your pack you pull out another apple- though this has a crisp, golden skin. A unique apple that you harvested from one of the sky archipelagos. You then jut your arm out toward the prince, offering the fruit to him.

“You have to be hungry by now,” you say matter-of-factly, “it’s not a three-course meal, but it’s something.”

Sidon laughs softly, taking the apple and holding it up to admire the way it reflects the sunlight. “Thank you, dearest,” he replies, “it’s rather pretty, it almost feels like a shame to have to eat it.” But eat it he does, sinking his sharp teeth into it as he takes a bite.

The two of you snack in silence, and you take the chance to view the map of the temple on the Purah Pad. In your head you formulate a plan, examining the terrain that surrounds the three remaining terminals for the wellspring. They were on separate floating islands rather than being connected to the main area as the first had been. But, you had a feeling that with the low-gravity you’d be able to find a way across.

When you return your attention back to the prince he’s just about finished with his apple, left holding only the core in his hands (and you try to ignore how your eyes are drawn to the small dribble of juice down his chin). “Well,” you clear your throat, hooking the tablet back onto your belt, “shall we explore the rest?”

Together, you work your way through the Great Wellspring. To unlock the second of the water wheels you need to figure out how to transport a large orb between two separate islands. As you find a solution the prince fends off a captain construct, and you nearly let yourself get distracted as you admire his spearmanship. Despite how exhausted you both were he could effortlessly hold his own in battle, gracefully lunging forward with the Lightscale Trident as he pierced his foe. Luckily, after the construct was slain you were able to keep its horn for crafting a new weapon in the future.

It doesn’t take you much longer to solve this puzzle, and you’re happy to activate the next water wheel. Simultaneously the third water vessel opens with a stream of water beginning to pour out. “Two down, two to go,” you sigh as you return to Sidon’s side, hands on your hips, “the others are on the other side of the temple.

“Then allow me to escort you,” he replies with a chuckle, making a show of bowing his head as he extends his arm toward you.

You roll your eyes as you playfully shove him in response, “no need, prince. C’mon.”

After traveling across the main island and dodging a handful of Chuchus you ascend another waterfall. At the top, however, you come face to face with a Like-Like. Unlike the one you’d fought at Mipha Court, this one didn’t have an armor of sludge, instead its body was coated in flames- making it easily susceptible to your splash fruits. It’s quickly disposed of as you move to the next marked point of the map.

This puzzle involves you having to use your Ultrahand ability. You haphazardly construct a spinning cog that uses the force of a small water fountain to generate electricity. As soon as you see the current running across the floor you jump in front of Sidon, pressing a hand to his chest as you force him to step backward. With how vulnerable the Zora were to anything electric, the last thing you needed right now was for him to get injured. When he gently places his hand atop your own, though, you quickly find yourself retracting it. You struggle to get rid of the heat on your face as you complete the current, unlocking the next water wheel and activating the fourth vessel.

‘Just one more, and the sludge will be gone, and this whole problem will be over,’ you tell yourself as you trek to the final area, ‘then I can keep looking for Zelda.’

After a short climb, you find yourself at a large pond, the center of which holds the activation terminal for the final water jug. The issue is that the pond was surrounded on all sides by constructs, soldiers and captains alike. It seemed as though the further you progressed through the temple, the more of them would be summoned. You do your best to handle them from a distance, as a well-timed arrow to the eye will knock them back into the water- and constructs can’t swim. To no avail, however, as it seems with everyone you take down a new one spawns to take its place.

“Alright then,” you grumble, casting a sideways glance to the prince, “new course of action. I run to that spinning tower because I bet that will unlock the next water wheel. You watch my back- make sure nothing, y’know, shoves a spear in me or anything like that.”

Though you laugh at yourself, Sidon looks less than enthused. Perhaps it was a poorly timed joke, considering the amount of times you both had been injured in battle- specifically by spears. And those were all occasions that you’d prefer not to reminisce about. Certainly not when you’d been stabbed by a Lizalfos, certainly not when Sidon had been attacked by the Yiga-

You force yourself to focus on the task at hand.

You sneak along the side of the water, kicking aside some of the small Chuchus that tried to crawl near you. You both move quietly, trying to avoid drawing the attention of the bow-wielding soldier constructs. The tower at the center of the pond has a fast-spinning component on top, far too fast for you to be able to sneak inside of it in any way. But as you stare at it you can see small blips of something within it- something covered in sludge. You had to get rid of the muck somehow.

Unfortunately, you were too busy trying to think of a plan that you didn’t see the arrow being aimed at you.

Before you can react, Sidon is calling out your name. You feel a strong arm wrap around your torso and tug you down onto the ground. You watch with wide eyes as a flaming arrow goes flying above your heads. You find the source, a captain construct that’s docking another arrow. Your arms move faster than you can think, grabbing your own bow and aiming for the eye stalk. You’re able to shoot first, knocking the construct back into the water.

Once the foe disappears you can still feel yourself buzzing with adrenaline. You let out a huff of air, looking down as your brain finally catches up with your physical movements. You were leaning back against the prince who was now kneeling on the stone floor. His arms were still wrapped tightly around you, pulling you against him as you still kept a tight grip on your bow. 

Nervously you cough, looking up at Sidon as you say a small, “thanks.”

He slowly nods, the irises of his eyes formed into thin slits as he gazes around to assess any further danger. Once he seems to deduce that everything is safe he looks down, meeting your gaze. “Of course, dearest,” he murmurs, gently loosening his hold on you, “I had to… I couldn’t-”

You place your hand on his bicep and look away. You understood why he had to grab you in such a way, you understood his impulse. If he was in imminent danger you would have acted in a similar fashion. Even still, you detested the way it made your heart pound in excitement when you knew he shouldn’t have been putting his hands on you in such a way. The hesitation is obvious as you pull away from one another, slowly rising to your feet once more.

‘Pull yourself together and focus,’ you internally chastise yourself, grimacing as you focus on the tower once more.

Once you get close enough you’re able to utilize a few hover stones to give yourself some leverage. Using your ascension ability you’re able to hop up directly through the stones, something which the prince watches with a curious fascination. Now, you find yourself balancing atop the floating rock, staring at the spinning tower as you draw your bow once more. 

“If I can just time this right…” you whisper to yourself, taking in a deep breath as you raise your arms to aim. With Fuse you attach a splash fruit to the tip of the arrow, narrowing your eyes as your eyes focus on the target. You watch it closely. One spine, a second, a third, a fourth. You time the revolutions in your head.

You breathe out. You shoot. 

When the splash fruit makes contact and washes away the sludge you sigh with relief. Now you’re able to see a glowing orange switch inside of the spinning component.

“Brilliant shot, little one!” Sidon cheers from down below. You smile in response, giving him a thumbs up.

You perform the same trick, carefully aiming and shooting another arrow. The light switches to green, signifying your success. The water drains from the pond and a hatch opens, giving you access to the final terminal and final water wheel. You peer over the edge down at Sidon and grin, shouting out, “finally!”

The low-gravity lets you hop down gracefully and as a pair you run over to the final cog. Once more you’re enveloped in the water shield that the prince grants you, using the water to spin the water wheel. In response, the last of the five vessels begins to overflow.

“You did it!” Sidon beams with excitement.

“We did it,” you correct him, nudging his side with a grin.

The prince smiles bashfully before nodding his head toward the central island of the wellspring. “Okay, they’re all filled up! Now we just need to use the central device.”

It was about midday now as you returned to the first pedestal, the one that allowed you to tip over the water jugs and drown out the muck. As you stare up at it you reach into your travel pack in search of another energizing elixir. You grumble, however, when you realize that you’d already drank the last one you’d brought with you. You really needed to get some proper sleep soon.

Beside you, Sidon sighs dreamily. “Being up here makes me long for my days of exploring once more.”

The days when he had been traveling with you to train the pilots for the Divine Beasts. Years ago. Days that you preferred not to think about.

You clear your throat before replying, “it is pretty nice on these sky islands. There’s so many of them, though, to be frank they intimidated me when I first saw them.”

A small grin reaches his lips as he gazes up, eyes curiously searching for the plethora of floating islands in the distance. “They’re immensely fascinating, aren't they? I’m sure every being walking the surface has had their attention captured by the new presence. Have you been able to survey any of them, little one?”

“A few, though I can’t take credit for any of the mapping. That’s all thanks to the Purah Pad,” you respond, casually tapping the tablet on your hip, “but the handful I’ve been able to explore have been interesting. It’s an odd feeling, though, standing in a place that was once probably full of life but is now abandoned. All the old buildings and constructs are just sitting around, waiting to be used. Like, it’s so clear that there’s so much untapped history. It’s the same in the depths.”

“The depths?” Sidon repeats, curious.

Oh. It hadn’t occurred to you that you hadn’t told him about the depths yet, nor the fact that he’d been so busy with matters in the domain that he was wholly unaware of an entire third layer of land beneath the surface. ‘Well, he’s in for a bit of a surprise.’ You grab the Purah Pad and open the application, scrolling downwards to reveal the depths map. The few Lightroots you were able to document flash on the screen, but they’re dwarfed by how much land you had yet to chart. 

“It’s a whole new region beneath the surface,” you explain to him, watching an expression of shock flicker across his face, “during the Upheaval there were chasms that opened up across Hyrule, which is how we can access it now. Lookout Landing has put together a crew to explore the new land. I went down there myself, it’s a strange place. All sorts of new plants and animals and-”

“Is it safe?” he interrupts you, obvious concern in his eyes.

You hesitate. It isn’t, of course, and you’re not going to lie to him about that. But nothing that you did was safe- it came with the territory of being the princess’ sworn knight. So the sudden question was off-putting.

You were tired.

“I- well… no. No it’s not,” you retort with a frown, “I mean, it’s a long fall, there’s gloom that saps your strength, camps of monsters- but I deal with the same dangers if I’m anywhere in the wilds of Hyrule. Why does it matter?”

Sidon falters, sensing that he may have struck a nerve. “I simply worry for you-”

You narrow your eyes, turning to step backward and away from him. Though it isn’t wise your first instinct is to say, “my safety is none of your concern-”

“I would argue otherwise-”

“Well worry about yourself!” you practically erupt. All of your stress, all of your pain, you knew he wasn’t the true cause of it all but you were exhausted of the rollercoaster of emotions that it put you through. And as the words left your mouth you regretted it, but you could hardly stop yourself. You were so exhausted, and every encounter with him only left you more confused than the last.

“And worry about your wife,” you add on, spitting out the title as if it were venom.

He practically jolts backward with a look of disgust from your tone. Now he reflects your anger, retorting with, “it matters not if I’m simply engaged still. Lady Yona is a dear friend of mine and you will not speak of her in such a way. Where is your respect?”

You scoff, ignoring the stinging pain in your throat as you bury your emotions, “respect? Don’t talk to me about respect. Do you know what I’ve endured in the past two weeks? My best friend is gone- again! And I couldn’t save her- again! My sword, my destiny, has been destroyed. My arm has been replaced with strange ancient technology that I don’t even understand-”

You were so tired.

The prince tries to get another word in but you swiftly cut him off as your rant continues, “I- I can’t handle this damn back and forth that you put me through. I have so much I need to worry about- the last thing I need is to be constantly reminded of the scraps of a relationship that could never be! We can’t be together, Sidon! At this point, I think it would hurt my heart less if you simply treated me like a stranger, that way I wouldn’t have to be constantly reminded of your affection for me-”

In your exhaustion and anger, you’d thrown your arms up, and you were swiftly cut off guard by the sound of the pedestal activating. Your right arm had touched the Zonai device without you meaning to do so. There’s a rumbling of water as the mechanisms of the wellspring activate.

Your chest heaves as you turn and look up, tears threatening to spill as you watch the water vessels tip over. You knew you’d messed up, you knew you’d have to apologize. But at the very least all of this muck would finally be gone. At the very least the Zora would be safe. Sidon would be safe.

The streams of fresh water come rushing down, ridding the fountain of all of the filth that had been clogging it. What you don’t see is the ball of muck that goes flying above your heads, landing in the plaza behind you. “The sludge dissolved,” Sidon gasps behind you. But his voice is quiet. Unhappy. You can hear it immediately. “The domain is surely safe now…”

A shrill shrieking pulls both of your attentions. You each spin on your heels and look to find the source. That’s when you spot it, the single piece of sludge that survived. It bubbled and festered in the middle of the island, and suddenly something- someone, shot up out of it.

“Shit,” you quietly curse, arming yourself with a sword.

“Not good,” the prince hisses at the same time, immediately grabbing for his spear and getting into a defensive position, “this strange creature must be responsible. Get ready!”

Something small and fish-like lands in front of you both, with a squid-like face and flailing arms. It doesn’t seem to be much of a threat at first, and that almost causes you to lower your guard. But then it uses the sludge to its advantage, creating a shark-like form for itself. The muck shark roars, creating a wave of filth around it.

“Water,” you say, throat still tight from your rant. But now you needed to focus, the little spat would have to be put behind you for now. “We need to get rid of all that sludge with water. I have splash fruits, you have your abilities.”

Sidon nods, a fierce expression on his face as he stares down the land shark, “yes, absolutely. Should we try and split up to-”

You’re quick to shake your head, “no, if any of that sludge gets into your gills you’ll get stuck out there. We have to stick together. And we need to move… now!”

The shark- squid- sludge monster- thing lunged forward, gliding across the stone and leaving a trail of muck in its wake. Your previous fatigue is overridden by the adrenaline that now courses through your veins. You grab Sidon’s arm and run in the opposite direction, attempting to put distance between him and the monster. 

“My water manipulation,” he urges you, “use it as a shield and attack it with a wave of water!”

He envelops you in the sphere of water and you focus your gaze on the sludge creature. After sucking in a breath of air you run toward it, avoiding the trail of muck it left in its wake. Using both hands to grip the sword, you yell as you fling it forward, the protective bubble dissipating as it shoots forward in tandem. 

The shark is struck and is momentarily stilled. You take advantage of its vulnerability to pull a splash fruit from your bag and launch it directly at the monster. With this attack, the sludge body disappears, leaving only the small fish-like body of the real creature. The little squid thing panics, its arms flailing about as it runs away from you. Now Sidon takes the opportunity to attack, dashing forward with his trident and attacking.

Your legs feel as if they’re on fire, your body’s exhaustion catching up with you mid-battle. You wince as you push through the pain, running to join the fray. As you begin to slash with your sword, however, the small monster jumps away and back into the sludge. Now, it spits more balls of filth into the air.

“Sidon-” you gasp, watching one fall right toward him, “Sidon, move!”

You run in front of him and shove him aside, hissing in pain as the sludge hits you instead. Though most of it landed on your armor, some of it stains your face and neck. It strings terribly, and you grit your teeth as you try to wipe it away.

The prince calls out your name but you shake your head, squinting as you attempt to refocus on the monster. It’s regained its shark form now, quickly swimming across the floor of the island and circling back toward you. You feel a strong hand wrap around your right arm, and this time it’s you who has to be guided away from the creature’s attacks.

As you run you fumble with your free hand, grabbing another splash fruit and puncturing it with your thumb. You let the water flow down onto your face, offering yourself some temporary relief from the poison of the muck. “Damn,” you mutter, “it got me good. But we just have to do that again, that sludge is its shield. It’s defenseless without it.”

The prince comes to a halt, turning and kneeling before you. He puts his hands on your shoulders and looks at you with sad eyes. “And what if you get hit by it again?” he asks with concern.

“Then I will deal with it-” you retort, but his grip on you tightens and grounds you.

“Stop that,” he says sternly, pleading with you, “please, beloved, I care about you far too much for you to be risking your life like this-”

You’re both interrupted by the shark roaring once more. This time it spits out a beam of the sludge, and your eyes widen as you start to run. You each are able to dodge the attack but it unfortunately puts you in different directions, now separated. The shark begins to move once more, this time toward the prince, and you know you have to act.

With another splash fruit fused to an arrow, you take aim. Your legs wobble and your knees threaten to buckle, fire coursing through your veins as you straighten your arms. You had to make this shot. Your heart pounds in your chest, brow furrowing as you watch the monster approach the prince.

You shoot. You could almost cry from the relief you felt when the shark cried out, halting in its tracks. Sidon then takes the lead, using his own water-based attack to pull the creature out of its shark disguise. Once again left tiny and defenseless, it attempts to run around to avoid the prince’s attacks.

It hops from one pool of sludge to another, before making the unfortunate decision of landing within your reach. You give it a nasty glare before stepping forward and sticking your sword right into its side. The monster, which up close you can see slightly resembles an Octorok, pitifully cries out. As pathetic as its body is, so is its death, it wriggles and writhes on the floor as its body starts to deflate.

Then, in a puff of air, it’s gone.

Your shoulders sag as you stumble backward, taking in a haggard breath as you look around. Slowly, but thankfully, all of the sludge begins to fade away. Every puddle, pile, and stain fades into the air. Even the muck that had landed on you in the battle disappears, and the stinging pain goes along with it.

With the adrenaline gone you practically collapse into a heap on the floor, crumpling to your knees. You lean on your hand, blinking rapidly as the fatigue washes over you once again. As the exhaustion returns so do all of the emotions 

You hear the padding of footsteps as the prince walks over to you. Your vision fills with red as he kneels before you once more. You feel a gentle hand atop the back of your head. He whispers your name.

“... I didn’t mean it.” you mumble, throat tight as you speak.

Sidon is silent for a moment and you fear his rejection. But instead, he moves to hold your chin, slowly lifting your head so that you look up at him instead. His eyes, gold and bright with the light of the sun, reflect your own sadness.

“I didn’t mean any of it,” you continue, tears finally sliding down your cheeks, “I don’t want to be a stranger to you. I want to be reminded of you, always, I think about you all the time. I want to be with you. I… I lo…”

He inhales sharply.

“I love you,” you choke out, voice cracking as you do so, “I love you so much it hurts-”

He pulls you into a tight hug, his arms wrapped securely around you as he pulls you against him. Your face is wet with tears that stain his scales but he seems not to care. You can hear his heartbeat and you can feel the way he shudders as he holds you. He breathes shakily as he presses a kiss to your temple.

“I love you too,” he whispers, rubbing soothing circles into your back, “and I am so sorry. For everything.”

You sob. For the first time since the engagement announcement, you let yourself fully relax into him. You don’t pull back, you don’t hesitate, you don’t flinch. You let him hold you. It was all you wanted.

And you were no fool, you knew you couldn’t have this forever. You still had to return to the domain, return him to his father and the council and his fiance. But, you had him for right now.

You would let yourself be held by him while you still could.

~~~ <> ~~~

hi y'all !!

i wrote a uhhh saucy lil sidon/reader/bazz smut oneshot over on my AO3 :) it's called invitation and i had a lot of fun writing it (it has nothing to do with this story, totally separate timeline)

Link to that fic

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[mulletpermsicantlookaway]

The Last Cupbearer, Part 7: James Talks with the Coach

For Part 6, click here: https://www.tumblr.com/mulletpermsicantlookaway/779342447470886912/the-last-cupbearer-part-6-the-chess-team-needs

Part 7: James Talks with the Coach

Bros, James wrote down what he remembered from his meeting with Coach Sanders the way he said he would. He gave it to me later, and I’m gonna put it here in my story so you all know what happened. It’s kind of twisted, if you ask me, but James never lies, so I don’t think he just made it all up.

“It’s amazing what you and Chase and Dev have done with the chess team,” Coach Sanders said. “You’ve taught them to work together like an athletic team without being jocks, and I wouldn’t have believed it if I hadn’t seen it.”

“Thanks, Coach,” James said, “they’ve really come together. The only problem is their team captain, Robert. The team came to the three of us, and…”

“And what?”

“Well, they asked us if we could turn Robert into a jock.”

“Interesting,” said the coach. “What’d you tell them?”

“That it was a huge thing to ask and that we’d talk to the coaches about it. I’m keeping my promise, but I’ve got to say, Coach, that I’m really uncomfortable with the idea of turning nerds into jocks against their will."

“James, son,” Coach Sanders sighed, “I understand why you’d feel the way you do, but what you just said shows a complete misunderstanding of the process. I’m going to speak frankly. You’re a smart young man; you know a lot, but there’s a lot that you don’t know, either. Whatever it might have looked like, we never, ever just came up with a random list of nerds and geeks that we wanted to force into being jocks. For a young man to get on that list, he had to have both the potential and the desire to be on it. Now, I’m not saying that the desire was always conscious. Part of what happens in the process is that it frees you up to be who you really want to be, even if you haven’t admitted it to yourself. It should be obvious to you by now that I know a lot about psychology. Your opinion is colored by your personal experience, but you were a unique case. You had a very hard adjustment. I’m sorry. It wasn’t intentional, and I’m going to explain how it happened.”

“Coach, I don’t follow. Are you trying to tell me that I subconsciously wanted to become a jock?”

“You? No. As I said, you were a unique case. To get to what happened to you, we have to talk about your friend Tyler,” the coach continued. “Tyler wanted more than anything in the world to date a cheerleader. That desire consumed him so much it was palpable. That’s how he came to our attention. But Tyler had a big problem: in order for a young man like him to date a girl like Brittney, he was going to have to become the kind of young man that could date a girl like Brittney. That was what he really wanted to be, and that’s what we helped him to become.”

“And Tyler was perfectly happy. The only problem, son,” the coach continued, “was you. You wouldn’t leave him alone. You provoked him; he got angry, and then he went off plan and put a Cup on you. You were not on the list, as Tyler told you, but Tyler didn’t understand what that meant. We weren’t ready for you. We knew what Tyler wanted; we had no idea what you wanted. As Derek told you, Tyler had messed up, and someone had to be punished. Maybe you thought Derek meant Tyler, but the person who was being punished, unintentionally, was you. Once the process started in you, there was no way to stop it. I know you wanted the Cup off early. You have to trust me when I tell you that doing so would have made things worse. You had to complete the process. But to make you fulfilled, like Tyler, we had to figure out who you were and what was driving you. So, what did you want? You wanted to find out what had happened to Tyler. You wanted to keep up with him, too, because despite your friendship you had always been rivals, whether you had realized that or not. And having been picked on – mostly by jocks – often in your life, you wanted to be big, strong, and intimidating, so that no one could pick on you ever again. Those were the desires, conscious and unconscious, that dictated the path of your development. You had the potential, both mentally and physically, to be an amazing football player – with our help. But it was a rough road for you. You are an unusually intelligent young man. You were very aware of – and very resistant to – what was happening to you. But now you know what drove you to become the young man you are now, the young man you were destined to be. You’ve developed into a remarkable person; I want you to know that. I know the transition wasn’t easy, but nothing worthwhile in life is ever easy.”

“Coach,” James said, ‘I’m not usually at a loss for words, but – what you’ve told me is a huge load to take in. Talk about ironic: I’m trying to save Tyler, and then he…well, never mind, Coach. It doesn’t matter. I’m happy with the life I have now, but I can’t just deny the suffering I went through. Hell, Coach, I even tried to kill myself at one point.”

“I know, son. Sometimes getting what you really want can be terrifying. Even Tyler found the process overwhelming when the changes he needed to make started to take hold. I don’t know if he ever told you anything. But the Cup doesn’t allow you to harm yourself.”

“As I found out. I’m glad I didn’t succeed, Coach, but yeah, that was hard. Very hard. If you don’t mind, I’d rather not talk about – that – anymore. But since you’re being so frank with me, Coach, I wondered if I could get a few more answers. First, back to Tyler: am I just imagining it, or has he been getting dumber?”

“Not getting, son, got. I’ll explain. As part of the mental conditioning, the intelligence gets – fuzzed – somewhat. It’s temporary, or it’s supposed to be, but it eases the adjustment. Whether it becomes more permanent is up to the individual. In someone as smart as you are, it barely made a dent, and you quickly recovered. In Tyler’s case, well, Tyler wasn’t as smart as you to begin with, and his girlfriend Brittney – she’s a very nice girl, but there’s not a lot of there there, if you know what I mean. Dating a girl like her doesn’t give Tyler a lot of incentive to exercise his brain the way he exercises his muscles. The mind adapts to the body. He’s become happy with being, to use ugly stereotypes, a meathead jock dating an airhead cheerleader. That’s what he wanted, and he’s happy. He doesn’t feel he’s missing anything by being a little dense. Derek, on the other hand, did feel something missing in his life and sought it out. He’s gotten a lot sharper since he started dating your friend Becky. Derek’s problem was a little different. When a young man resists coming to us when it’s time for the Cup to be removed, as Derek did, the drop in intelligence can be more severe. That happened with Ben, too. That’s why we were trying to pressure him through his friends. I have good hopes at this point that Derek will recover everything he lost. Ben should, too, if he wants to, especially dating someone as smart as Devin. But it depends on the individual. Some young men come to find that their intelligence was a burden they prefer to live without, and having tried dumb on, so to speak, they prefer to stay that way.”

“I get it. It’d be easier in some ways. Believe me, I know. But I just can’t imagine Derek not being a jock, Coach. I assumed he’d always been one.”

“He was quite different before, a lot like you, in fact, but no one remembers that now, least of all Derek. He originally came to us desperate for help in becoming the football player he wanted to be. And we helped him. He was the first, you know. That’s why the coaches have always kept a special eye on him.”

“Well, Derek’s a good bro, and as for Tyler, well, it’s his life. He’s happy. Who am I to say he’s missing something?  Even I can barely remember what he was like before. Everyone assumes now that he’s always been a jock, like Derek. Or like me, for that matter. But what about Jeremy and Chase, and Steve? What can you tell me about them?”

“Let’s start with Steve. He’s achieved amazing results. What Steve wanted most was his father’s approval – and yours. It was no accident that you were the one asked to put the Cup on him. That worked out well for him and you. Whatever else was going to happen, your relationship with Tyler had to change. I assume you realize you had a crush on Tyler? With him being straight, you two wouldn’t have been able to go on the way things had been. Even if you’d both stayed nerds, your friendship was in danger.”

“What, so you set me up with Steve and made us fall in love?”

The coach laughed: “Oh no, James. No one can make anyone fall in love. You’ve been listening to me, son, but you haven’t quite heard everything I’ve been trying to tell you: no one can make you do anything completely against your will. We can bring out your potential, but we can’t force you to be anything you don’t really want to be. Steve liked you, sure. We just put him in your way and let nature take its course, like Jeremy and Chase. Of course, those two were already in love with each other. They just hadn’t realized it yet. Jeremy now, he’s turned out extremely well, but it was tricky. We’d never had a case like his before. But once we figured out how to help Jeremy, it was easier to figure out the pattern for Chase and eventually for Devin. I’ve got to say, son, that even though it did make a lot of work for me and Coach Halvorson, I’m glad you brought Jeremy to us. He’s a fine young man, and one of my favorites. He has real potential as a basketball player, too, maybe even professionally. He’s not the sharpest tool in the box, of course.  Chase, on the other hand, is nearly as bright as you, but he likes to play the dumb jock because – unlike you – the last thing he wanted to be was intimidating. Chase just wanted to like people and be liked. As for little Devin, who’s not so little now, Devin wanted to be what he thought of as cool. He also needed his father’s approval, and he wanted to be free of his mother’s over-protectiveness. He was terrified of the jocks, particularly of you, but he secretly admired you and wanted to be like you. Devin’s a very happy guy now. But even I was surprised by how – liberated – his personality became once we freed him up. Even for a jock, he’s got a foul mouth.”

“Dev is a character, all right, but we all love him. And Jeremy’s – conversion – was a complete accident, Coach; Steve and I had no idea that could happen.”

“I know.” Coach Sanders sighed again. “James, son, I know being a smart jock can be kind of a curse, but I think you’re wise enough to handle it. Not everyone can. I know it’s been tough. I should have talked to you earlier. I just held off for fear of making things worse. Our old football coach held me back, too. A brilliant man, but he had his flaws. For such a visionary, he was unfortunately completely old school about one issue: he really couldn’t handle gay jocks. I was dealing with that when I should have been paying more attention to your adjustment. Coach Halvorson and I finally had to ask him to leave, and then we had to find a new football coach. So now Halvorson and I are the only ones in the athletic department who know about the old coach’s program. But I’m getting off track: none of that was your concern. You were our student, and we were the teachers: you should have been our priority regardless. I just wanted to let you know that Coach Halvorson and I both felt that we hadn’t quite done right by you, and we’re sorry for that. He assures me you’ve turned into a very fine wrestler.”

“Thanks, Coach. Really, I don’t think either of you need to apologize for anything. Yeah, things could have been smoother, but I’m who I need to be now. And I’m not blind to the fact that you’re taking a huge risk confiding in me.”

“I know enough of your character now, son, to know that I can trust you. But maybe I’m not taking as much of a risk as you think. There was one other thing I wanted to tell you. You are very close to the phase of your development that we call total integration. Your friend Tyler is already there. You remember that I said the mind adapts to the body. Your memories are part of that, too. Has Tyler, by any chance, talked about things you two used to do when you were younger?”

“I think I know what you’re driving at, Coach. Yeah, he was going on about the two of us playing football when we were kids. It shocked me at first, but I didn’t try to correct him, because I could tell he believed it. What bothered me more, Coach, is that I started remembering the same things he did, you know, as soon as he started talking about it, even though I know it didn’t really happen that way. And that’s when I realized that Tyler didn’t remember that we used to be different.”

“And when you believe it, like Tyler, you'll find everyone else will, too. You’re very close now, son. Very close. You and Steve, and then Jeremy and Chase. And Dev and Ben will get there later, of course.”

“And then none of us will remember being anything but jocks, just like Ty-boy. I suspected as much, Coach. Honestly, I suppose I should be scared, or angry, or something, but I’m not. I’m too far along now to feel anything but relief. I’ll finally be whole again. That’s how I feel. Coach, even if I wanted to, I couldn’t handle being a nerd again now. I’ve been a jock too long. I love playing football. And wrestling. I like working out, hanging out with my bros, and watching sports. And I really love being a big guy.”

“That’s good to hear, son. There’s nothing that means more to a coach and a teacher than helping a student reach his potential.”

“It’s kind of like the Borg, you know, Coach, on Star Trek? Once they’ve been assimilated, after a while you can’t remove their implants or they die. And I think I’d die if I had to be a nerd again.”

The coach chuckled, “And yet you just nerded out, son. At least, I think that’s what I think your peers call it.”

“No shit, Coach! Sorry about the language, but you’re right! I totally nerded out. That’s funny. I didn’t know I still could.”

“James, son, look at it this way: you’ve been a jock so long now that you no longer feel threatened by things that you might think of as nerdy. No one’s really one hundred percent one thing or the other, you know. That’s not the way people work. The fact that you could let yourself nerd out a bit is just another sign that you’re very close to completing your development.”

“All the same, Coach, I’ll try to keep that to a minimum, at least in front of my bros. Holy shit. What would Tyler say? Sorry, Coach. Anyway, I almost forgot what I wanted to talk to you about in the first place: what should we do about Robert?”

“The whole team really wants him to be a jock?”

“Yes.”

“Then I think it will work. He can’t be happy with himself, or he wouldn’t be acting the way he is. That’s why we helped Ben, you know. It wasn’t some juvenile act of revenge because he’d been mean to Jeremy, whatever it may have looked like. Ben was unhappy. His being mean to Jeremy is what brought his needs to our attention. But if we put a Cup on Robert, well, it’s the last Cup that we have, and I don’t know if we’ll be able to acquire any more. And while I may have found another solution, it’s too early to tell yet how well it will work. I realize there’s the alternate method that gave us Jeremy, Chase, and Devin. That’s worked amazingly well so far, but it won’t work forever. As you young men finish growing, you’ll stop being contagious to non-jocks. But that’s a longer-term problem. For right now, if we’re going to use a Cup on Robert, we need to think about who should put it on him. It should be one of the people on his team. You and Steve and Chase and Dev can think it over and tell me who it should be. Meanwhile, if you want to take the Cup now, I’ll trust you to take care of it.”

“Why does it matter who puts it on, Coach?”

“It’s not required; it’ll still work, but it works more effectively if there’s a personal connection between the giver and the receiver.  Also, the person wearing the Cup can only talk about it to the person who put it on him.”

“And then he just handed the thing to me,” James said to me. “I never thought I’d see a Cup again, and here I was, holding the last one in my hand. I’ve got to tell you, part of me was really tempted to smash it, if that’s even possible, but I reminded myself that we were doing it for Robert and the whole team. So I took it, and I brought it with me so that we all could decide what to do.”

To be continued

https://www.tumblr.com/mulletpermsicantlookaway/779614260763525120/the-last-cupbearer-part-8-robert-and-eric

[the-bi-space-ace]

Is There An Echo In Here?

No. There isn’t.

Alright. Here’s the thing. Echo is my favorite character so I’m going to want to see him all the time but I can still understand his absence even when I miss him. His absence in season 2 hurt me but it made total sense. He needed to go. I love him for doing what he needs to and not giving up what he values. It’s part of why I love him.

What I can’t understand is what happened in episodes 6&7 of season 3.

I’ve been fairly positive in my outward opinions for the most part. I rarely loudly complain. I rarely throw in the towel but I do still have opinions that aren’t positive and that’s okay.

I wasn’t the biggest fan of episodes 1-4. Not in the way that I didn’t like them bc I did. They had moments that I really really liked and I genuinely had a good time watching them. But they didn’t wow me. Tbh they don’t have to for me to enjoy them. They just have to be fun in my book. There’s no problem in having fun and not being wowed by every episode. I think that’s just how it goes. You can’t please everyone and I never expect to be happy about everything. It’s part of why I’ve kept my love of this show for so long.

I don’t have high expectations going in so I am rarely ever totally dissatisfied.

This is the exception.

I was absolutely thrilled with episode 5. Finally Echo is back. The Crosshair content was top tier. There’s jokes. There’s heart. It’s fun. It’s exciting. Loved it. It’s everything I want out of the show. They’re together. They have really heart wrenching moments right up against heart warming ones. It’s perfect. I was feeling pretty positive about moving forward.

Then 6&7 happened and I think I lost a huge chunk of hope for this show where Echo is concerned.

I still liked the episodes! I think the episodes were really really good. I love Rex. Crosshair really shined again so my heart rejoiced. There’s intrigue there’s excitement there’s plot. I skew more towards character growth and plot focus than anything else so a lot of my boxes are getting checked here.

Except for one very large thing that made me unhappy.

I’m not counting Echo’s two appearances in these episodes as him being there. Seeing his face and him saying one line really…. Doesn’t count. Not in my book. So far out of 7 episodes he’s really only been in one. I’m almost convinced the writers have forgotten he’s a main character with the way they’re treating him.

The first four episodes were very focused on the different characters and what they’re doing and how things are going. I love these types of episodes. I do this in fics when I want development to have a lot of focus! Split them up! Follow them around! Put them in different pairs and watch them grow! I love that! So… why didn’t we get an episode like that with Echo? Since we’re showing them all split up where was Echo’s episode to focus on what him and Rex were doing? The show followed Crosshair and Omega three times. It followed Hunter and Wrecker. Why would there not be an episode following Echo? Or at least having him meet up with Hunter and Wrecker and following those three for an episode.

When we finally got Echo back my heart literally rejoiced. Episode 5 was the first episode that got me excited about where this season was going.

And then, yes! We’re going to see Rex. We’re going to see what’s up with the clone network and Echo *checks notes* has carpool duty???? Are you serious? These two episodes were possibly the best ones to have him around and he’s just… not? Why? So he can pick them up at the end of it?

It doesn’t make sense to me.

At this point it truly seems like this show is just sidelining him because they don’t feel like writing him. Is this how the rest of the season goes? Is he not with the batch for the majority of it? Are we going to have two maybe three episodes that he appears in at all?

It hurts. It hurts because it’s starting to feel purposeful and not even in a good ol’ he’s got something good coming in the plot kind of way.

If we get some good Echo focus in the later episodes then fantastic! Maybe this post will be meaningless and I’ll be proven wrong. I’d honestly really love that tbh. I’d love to look back and go: huh. I was so worried for absolutely no reason.

Otherwise if the season continues with how it’s been then I don’t have much hope for my little Echo loving heart.

As always I’ll still write Echo-centric fics and yell about him all day. Hell maybe I’ll write a long post for Echo like I’ve done for Crosshair. Give him some extra love and attention in these trying times.

As a last note: I love this show. And my criticisms or opinions are never a declaration of hatred for this thing that we all love. I’m simply screaming into the void and hoping people who love Echo as much as I do hear me.

[password-door-lock]

Mystictober Day 22– Moon/Sun

You try to get Ray and Saeran to take care of themselves (926 words). 

When the sun is out, you spend time with Ray.

Your boss tends to work better between the nine-to-five hours, although his actual schedule is probably something more like six-to-six. “Here, my MC,” he pushes you gently to the side, his fingers gripping the back of your rolling chair. “Let me do that. I’ll be faster.” This isn’t the first time that Ray has opted to take over your work for you, and you’re sure it won’t be the last. 

“It’s supposed to be your lunch break, sir,” you remind him. Ray has never asked you to use such honorifics, but you can tell he likes to hear them from the way his face flushes just a touch at the sound of your words. “You know— you eat something and you stop working?” It’s a foreign concept at Magenta, but sooner or later, your boss will come around, won’t he?

Ray considers this, his face contorted in an expression of stern concentration. “Did you eat yet?” This is not where you wanted the conversation to go. Ray works too hard, and as his assistant, it’s your job to change that. 

“I’ll take my break when you get back,” you assure him, “I already had breakfast, and besides, I’ve got snacks.” You hold up a cardboard-flavored granola bar that you stole from Magenta’s kitchen. “Please. I worry about you, Ray.”

He sighs. “I think I can eat something small.” This is a huge improvement from his earlier insistence that he didn’t deserve to eat anything until after his work got done, so you’ll take the win. As much as you want Ray to take better care of himself, you don’t want to force him to do anything he doesn’t want to do. 

“Want me to go make you a plate?” You ask. Sometimes, this is his preference. Perhaps it’s because it gives him more time to spend on his task, or perhaps he simply likes the thought of you going out of your way for him. 

“No, no, that’s okay,” Ray assures you, “Just stay here and wait for me. I’ll only be a moment.” He plants a gentle kiss on the top of your head, a clear signal that he doesn’t feel you’re unfairly pressuring him. 

Ray returns in a few minutes with two plates— one, presumably, his own, contains a small sandwich. The other is absolutely loaded with more food than you could ever hope to eat in one sitting, even if you had skipped breakfast. “You might have to help me with this after you finish yours, if you’re still hungry,” you tell him casually and truthfully. 

“Okay,” says Ray, settling into his desk chair. Maybe you could set up a cozy nook for break time somewhere in the intelligence room. “But I need to get back to work.” You sigh. You know he’s right— there will certainly be consequences if he doesn’t resume his efforts soon. You can make things infinitesimally better for Ray, but until you attack the root cause of the problem, your efforts will be largely for naught. 

Saeran, on the other hand, prefers to work by moonlight. 

He listens to loud music, a cacophony of distorted strings, as he hammers out code. You don’t have to wonder when he sleeps, because he does it in front of you— at periodic intervals, half-hour stretches with his head down beside the keyboard and the music still blasting at full volume.

Unlike Ray, he does not respond well to your efforts to look after him. “Do you want some tea?” You ask gently. Ray bought a tea set for you before he even met you, and you use it frequently in this place with nothing else to do. You’re particularly appreciative of the electric kettle, which you often employ to minimize trips to Magenta’s kitchen. You have no interest in interacting with believers when you don’t need to. 

Saeran snorts. “I know you’re only trying to trick me into sleeping.”

“Yeah, well, it’s nighttime,” you reason, “Most people use it to get some rest.”

“Do I look like most people to you, prince(ss)?” Saeran hammers in a few more lines of code.

“I know your work is important, but—”

“This is my time.” Saeran abruptly grabs you by the face, guiding you to bend over so you’re looking into his eyes. “Not Ray’s. I’m not gonna waste it on sleep.”

That makes you very sad. You don’t like the thought of poor Saeran fighting so hard to get an hour of ‘his own’ time, only to use his hard-won prize for tasks assigned to him by the Savior. It seems beyond unfair. “Oh, Saeran,” you sigh, once he releases you. “You’re already hours ahead. Why not spend your time… doing something you enjoy?”

You’d still prefer it if he were sleeping, but you understand his reasoning. You’d be almost as happy if Saeran were to simply take his time to do anything other than work. “I don’t have anything I enjoy,” Saeran informs you between lines of code.

“That is a lie,” you argue playfully, “I have it in writing that you like messing with me.” Granted, the writing was a threatening post-it that Saeran left at your desk when you hid his caffeine pills from him, but it still counts. 

Saeran’s eyes snap up, and he pushes his chair away from his desk. “Is that so, prince(ss)?” Well, you’re in for a hell of a night now— but at least you got him to stop working for a moment.

[jasongotdrip]

FREAKING YAP ALERT 🚨

hyperfixation is so weird like. finish a show (in this case, arcane) and think about it until you finish a game (mouthwashing) and you think about that until you think about a show you used to watch (hxh) and you think about that until you’re thinking about those finished shows and games at the same time and you’re just buzzing. buzzing. just brrr like an overwhelmed calculator that’s doing multiple problems at once. BECAUSE I WANNA MAKE ARCANE ART LIKE I SAID I WOULD. I WANNA MAKE MOUTHWASHING ART BUT I’VE ONLY MADE ONE VIDEO. AND NOW HXH IS COMING BACK TO ME😭😭 ALONG WITH EVERY OTHER FANDOM/INTEREST I HAVE???🙏

IM SORRY THIS HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH HYPERFIXATION BUT I NEED TO YAP.

this is a vent that’s been building up since like October👍

I HAAATE HAVING “RIZZ” IM SORRY BUT WHY DO PEOPLE KEEP LIKING ME. I DIDNT EVEN DO ANYTHING MAN. I LITERALLY JUST EXIST. IM A FILLER FRIEND WHO KEEPS EVERYONE HAPPY.

feelings are completely valid, of course. i respect everyone. it’s hard for me to develop feelings without like.. idk. I might be demiromantic or something on that spectrum. But that’s besides the point.

I make it my goal to stay on good terms with everyone. I just want to make people happy, that’s all i’m here for. if you have feelings, shoot your shot!

but please, PLEASE. You don’t confess your love to someone you’d met 3 months ago. You DONT, confess to someone you’d met 3 months ago,who you KNEW was in New Orleans, SEEING THEIR GRANDFATHER. FOR THE LAST TIME.

if any year of my life were a test, 2024 would have been it. I moved houses, schools, lost people physically and mentally, gained people, and matured. well i had to, of course.

on Tuesday October 22, 2024. 2 days after getting home from visiting my grandfather. my world went silent in the parking lot of my sister’s college. I stood there staring at the ground after being told he passed away. I can’t even remember how long I stood there. I felt my phone slip out of my hand onto the ground and I felt my sister’s arms around me but I didn’t move. The drive home with my mom was silent. Then the phone calls and texts rolled in from my family, but I was still silent. I was angry. Grateful that he wasn’t in pain but angry that he had to suffer in the first place. I didn’t tell any of my friends until the next day, at school, after breaking down in class. Some still don’t even know. My voice stayed quiet for a while after that. I saw my dad for the first time in months. I saw family and friends and I realized as much as it hurts, I’ll always be grateful to have people that care.

honestly something in me wants to believe he’s still in new orleans. not in the hospital, dancing and singing at restaurants. i tried convincing myself at the funeral too. but as i walked out that church I realized I can’t live my life the way i have been.

I stepped up and i started making friends. Me, the introverted quiet kid, talked to people. I visited my dad, and my family more than ever. I broke the mould i put myself into. I reached out to some old friends from old schools. Most of all, I started appreciating little things about myself. I used to absolutely hate my freckles and my curly hair, and while i can’t say i LOVE myself, i don’t hate myself… as much. And that’s huge for me. I can’t say my sh habits have gotten better.. but i’ll work on that. :)

i realized i changed in confidence mentally but also physically— this isn’t the best example, so i’ll be vague. when my mom and stepdad fight i always feel words bubbling up in my throat like lava. I want to tell them to stop, that my siblings shouldn’t hear it. And guess what? That’s what i did!! When things get out of hand i don’t even care I’ll literally speak up. …sometimes they’ll tell me to shut the hell up or go away. But sometimes they listen. I think they noticed how much risk I take now. Hit me I literally do not give a freak. And then i’ll clean the entire house, loudly or quietly because i clean when I’m absolutely seeing red.

for sure , music helps. when I’m buzzing angrily or i’m feeling horrible or anxious, i put on my headphones and I manipulate myself into feeling the happiness from a song. I learned how to literally make myself happy, even if it’s just a cover up lol

another thing i realized? I can’t live my life without doing something to help this curse of a disease. I want to help people and families with cancer. Any type. I’ve never felt so strongly about my future. Whether it’s full time or not, I want to work in the medical field as a nurse, oncologist or something like that. A dream hit me then, if i started some kind of organization to donate and help families travel to their patients, to visit them and remind them that they’re loved, and that they have things to live for. That’s a huge stretch and i have no idea how I’d accomplish it, but it’s worth thinking about.

because too much of my family has been lost to cancer. cancer eats away at families and no one deserves to go through it. i want to help. whether it’s helping families, patients themselves, researching, or anything.

I’m only a teenager so this career/life dream is probably gonna warp or change, but I’ll always want to help somehow.

now i uh.. don’t remember why I’m saying all this on a tumblr post. It was supposed to be about hyperfixation but now im feeling inspired? I might have gone through every emotion writing this.😭

[aliothbuzzsawshark]

Alright it’s tomorrow I watched the first 2 go rush dub episodes and here’s what my thoughts are - from a huge sevens fan who only has seen a few clips, tumblr posts, and the cat episode before watching

I also watched this with my sister, who greatly dislikes Yu-Gi-Oh! Bridge content. It was a joy having to also explain to her Yes You Can Draw Multiple Cards And All Of This Is Legal Play. A joy to watch from that alone

Episode 1 and I actually really like Yudias? I thought I’d get annoyed since he’s an alien and not an ohdo but he’s been the best part of this show so far. I love how dramatic both he and the voice actor are when doing literally anything ever. He’s insane in the way which reminds me of the drama in Yu-Gi-Ohs past. Also he’s just funny. I laughed at him a lot more than I expected, especially with him and the Velgears. Solid 8/10 character, would belong in any other Yugioh perfectly and his dub voice actor actually kills it at being Yudias (10/10 on va-ing)

Now I was weary of Yuhi. Before knowing anything about Go Rush I told myself I’d be a Yuhi stan. But no he’s kinda annoying? Like idk if it’s a translation thing but he just so fucking annoying whenever he talks. I think the dubbing plays a part of that too though; I’ve played stuff with his va (ntwewy) and though he sounded way to monotone but this feels like he’s exaggerating every sentence in the worst way possible. I like his design and his weird alien hair but unfortunately that’s about it? Like 4/10 probably better in sub I hate hearing him

Yuamu is almost good. I almost like her. Her dub voice feels way too high pitch but that’s not even my main problem and I don’t know what is. I liked her before watching (especially her hair, love the gradient and bangs) but she just feels…boring? Like she’s just here to explain how to play and has one part in the second episode which I find annoying but I’ll get to that later. Overall 6/10 nothing too wrong with her and her voice only annoys me a little (her voice actress would do a great Yuna though tbh)

I don’t really have any notes about the plot. I think it’s funny how the Ohdos say there’s a the smartest people alive for the sake of their livelihood, I like the velgears, the bit with Yudias just having booster packs was funny, I really like Yudias. Nothing wrong with it. Overall like 7/10 episode. Sevens had a better starting episode but I didn’t expect anything else

(also theme “song” was just as boring as sevens BUT THEY SAY THE NAME OF THE SHOW! Actually blew my mind the first time I have low standards)

Episode 2 is actually pretty fun. I like Yudias reminiscing about the war through a card, I like the secrecy (wait it’s called the MIK originally? Honestly I can’t be mad at the change two 3 letter organization is a bit confusing), and Manabu and Nyandestar are a pretty fun duo!

Manabu is a silly guy. I already liked him out of pity before but he’s just cool. I like his design and voice and him as a character overall. I thought him just saying no to dueling at first was really funny (paused the episode around that point and pointed out to my sister how the question “what if I just say no to duel” finally got answered) and I think it’s a really cute detail how his disguise it just Gakuto. 7/10 character would be higher but MADDOX SOGETSU? Bad name me and my sister just started calling him Matthew because that’s a better name. (Alternate better names include Mason, Morgan, Matt, Mark, any M name)

Nyandestar is fun! Meowdestar is a fine change to her name, it makes sense but I will never fucking call her that. She’s just fun, that’s about it! Her and Manabu are like team rocket but she’s both James and meowth. No complaints 9/10 I like cats.

Idk what isn’t a translation change, but the conversation with a disguised Manabu and Yuamu made me feel…mad? Annoyed? Idk but saying a man is faking a pet snake because snake aren’t slimy and are actually reptiles is such a nickpicking thing I would hate to be in her presence. ALSO THE OHDO’S INHERITED UTS??? NEPO BABIES. Another point against the Ohdo twins.

However, Yudias is a bright light in this dub, his va is doing amazing still and I love his vocal delivery in Yudias’s flashback of leaving his home planet. And from the 10 seconds I saw I like Zwijou enough (I’m not checking the spelling) and his voice actor. Really giving the dead wife trope and I’m curious on how I’ll inevitably hate him later.

Fine episode, 6/10. I’ll probably continue watching just out of principle but probably wouldn’t if I didn’t care for Sevens. Better than I expected tbh would recommend to yugioh watchers as long as they’re used to Yugioh dubs.

also peak logo, might be my favorite and that’s high praise lol anyways goodnight woohoo

[heyclickadee]

Okay, here’s the slightly evil, kind of sad, but mostly happy in a somewhat melancholy way (basically just a lot of feelings here) thought I had about Tech and Phee having kids, if that should ever happen:

So, operating under the assumption that Tech comes back, let’s say he and Phee do get together. And let’s say they stay together, and end up more or less space married. Let’s say they both want kids, and, after a lot of discussion about the war going on in the background and how they’re going to raise them and keep them safe, they end up going ahead with it. They don’t really settle down in any one place, but they’ve got their own ship with plenty of room, Pabu (maybe) is a good, stable home base to go back to when needed, and they’ve got a huge family for support. Those kids, if they have more than one, are loved. They have tons of uncles, somebody is always around, maybe some of the other batchers have partners (or not) and also have kids or adopt kids (heck, let’s throw Riyo in there, too, since she and Echo are a popular ship—they end up together but they don’t want kids, but they do a lot of work helping younger clones when they’re not fighting the Empire, Hunter took in several of the clone cadets they rescued from Tantiss, Wrecker is the favorite uncle but Crosshair is the favorite babysitter, they all manage to visit Cut and Suu once in a while, and and both Omega and Lyana are delighted to have little cousins running around (I kind of headcanon that Shep and Lyana kind of adopted Phee into their family after she found Pabu, so even if we’re going with a version of Phee that was formerly a Jedi and and doesn’t really know who her birth parents were, her kids are going to have family on both sides).

And this all exists just as a headcanon for something that could maybe happen after season three, depending on how season three goes, buuuut I like it. It’s just this nice little thought of this big, chaotic family, way bigger than just our six batchers, that’s structured a little weirdly, because clones, and everyone has their problems. but they’re all doing their best for each other and there’s a lot of love in it. And then I started thinking about clone aging.

And we all know clone aging sucks, but: let’s say clones really do age at twice the normal rate once they reach maturity, and let’s say Tech is chronologically, like, twelve but physically in his late twenties. A hard late twenties where he could pass for anything between thirty and fifty, but late twenties all the same. Suppose he gets the best case scenario and manages to live till he’s physically 90. Chronologically, he’ll be around forty-five. So, close to best case scenario, barring dying violently or getting sick, he’s got maybe another thirty-three years in him. That might seem like a lot (and it probably is to a clone), but to put that in perspective, I’m thirty-five. If I die in thirty-three years, I’ll only be sixty-eight—I’ll have died pretty young. And I’ve already been alive almost three times as long as many of the clones have. The clones do not get that much time.

There’s a lot to be explored with that in regards to Phee; I’ll be honest, the potential, “This is going to be over faster than either of us are going to be ready for,” “It is—let’s do it anyway,” is part of why at draws me to the ship, because there’s something a little defiant about two people going into a relationship knowing one of them was built to die faster, and choosing to live their lives how they want despite that. But there’s also a lot to be explored in how Phee and Tech would handle that with their kids. Because—they’d tell them. They’d have to sit down and tell them once they got to a certain age. Tech is going to be lucky to see them hit their twenties. It’s not like they wouldn’t notice their dad and their clone uncles getting old so much faster than their mom, Omega, or their uncle Shep, or anyone else they know. They’d ask questions, and it’s not like Tech wouldn’t be up-front. But I don’t think it’d be an easy conversation for any of them to have.