#I do think it’s something that should be talked about though
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asking sincerely. do you see a romance between jayce and viktor? do you think they ended up being something romantic at the end?
With apologies I am going to only half talk about the thing you are asking me, since I have something else on my mind and you happened to hit the button that makes me vomit it into words.
Coming at this from an aromantic perspective, I obviously don't experience the state of absurd obsessive delusion that you bizarre romantic freaks fetishize so feverishly*, but I am often annoyed by the idea that friendship and romance are either opposites or mutually exclusive. From my perspective, the boundary between the two is at best thin, and more realistically not actually a boundary at all except by cultural construction.
*i am taking an excessively hostile, crass tone for my own amusement i do not mean this seriously please be normal at me, weird allo freaks
I won't get into my full feelings about the end of Arcane, but it seems perfectly plain to me that the script, the imagery and the animation presents Jayce and Viktor as two halves of a whole, not opposing forces but alike to yin and yang: opposites which each contain the other. And at the climax of the show, the greatest peril to life and peace in the narrative is resolved by these two men literally joining their bodies and souls together, and going into eternity holding one another for comfort and strength. They are quite literally soulmates, quite literally the most important people in one another's lives.
I don't think that that kind of intimate emotional connection between men must necessarily be either romantic or sexual - I am aromantic, and plenty of ace people exist, and there is nothing in our natures excluding us from intense connections of love with other people of any gender.
I also think it is willfully ignorant (and genuinely homophobic) to act as though these deep connections are mutually exclusive with sex and romance. As though if Viktor and Jayce fucked nasty and made out sloppy style, suddenly their intimacy is less pure or valid, or tainted somehow.
"If these two men who are emotionally close to one another also fuck or get romantically involved, then friendship is dead, murdered on the floor by a dick-shaped knife; vile sexuality corrupts and debases the true, pure and virtuous love of ✨friendship✨" <- This shit is homophobic at a baseline, queerphobic in general, and frankly as an aromantic man I find it pretty fucking insulting as well.
What, are my friendships with other men just inherently more pure and divine, more meaningful and true than a gay man's can ever be, because I will never suffer the vile temptation of adding romance to my affection? Is that how I should think of myself? And is an aroace man more pure than me still, the only source of TRUE male friendship that a man can ever experience, free from the pustulant corruption of sexuality and romantic desire?
You get this pathetic defensiveness (especially from men, but other genders aren't immune) wherein sex and sexuality and romance between men is perceived as a threat to men's right and ability to experience deep connection to each other. But the emotional castration of men comes not from people imagining sex and romance as a component of our relationships - it comes from people who insist that our emotional lives must be ruled by strict binaries. Sex and romance, OR ELSE friendship. Deep romantic connection OR ELSE deep platonic connection. Pick one and do not dare to imagine both, nor act as though the boundary between them is something that we built by cultural fiat, and which can be dismantled just the same.
And yes, yes, yes, I know there are cultural forces literally illuminati-style conspiring to systemically erase the entire existence of explicitly romantic, sexual male love from media, and I know that homophobic puritanism is on the rise and there are material concerns and a real necessity for explicit representation in fiction, yes I know. Everything is more complicated than a tumblr post can cover, I am not trying to Solve Rainbow Capitalism™ over here, I am trying to express frustration as an aromantic man that this stupid fucking binary keeps getting culturally reinforced by both my enemies and my well-meaning allies, when I think the binary is what's fucking killing us in the first place.
So anyway. My position is that Viktor and Jayce can be entirely aromantic no-homo friends, and they can fuck nasty in the throes of mutual need and obsession, and I refuse to entertain the idea that there is an irresolvable contradiction between those things. Each of those can contain the other, or become the other given time and circumstance.
What the imagery, storytelling and script of Arcane makes clear is that Viktor and Jayce love each other more than life itself. To say that that love must be shoved into the box of either "platonic" or "romantic" is to miss out on almost everything that is beautiful about love. It can be both and neither! It can be a secret third, ninth or fifteenth thing that they haven't invented a tag for on Ao3 yet.
They are giving each other whatever the spiritual mind-ghost equivalent of sloppy backshots are on the ethereal plain forever, they are the most romantic lovers in the cosmos, and they are also the most chaste and platonic life-partner friends you have ever seen, effortlessly intimate and unashamedly tender. They are men who love one another, in every way that love matters.
You can pick whichever interpretation brings you joy, and resonates with what your heart needs, the text of the show is eminently and explicity open to it, and anyone who says otherwise either failed to pay attention, or refused to pay attention on purpose.
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(ㅅ´ ˘ `)♡ mad(ly in love) max。 ⊹˚.⋆
partially inspired by this by @angldelight before it got away from me! <3
max knew you looked better in blue than red. and if you did look good in red, it was the red of the his team rather than the garish red of ferrari. he believed the statement that everyone is a ferrari fan even if they don't know it, because if they saw a photo of you, they'd have brand loyalty to the stallion for the rest of their days.
there was a reason why your face and name were everywhere in your home country. you were a pride and joy to the nation you called home. but, max was more than happy to stake a claim on you.
max liked you because you challenged him. far too many women would bend over backwards for the three time champion, but you simply glared him down with your hands on your hips. you stood toe to toe with him even if there was a height difference. but you kept your gaze steady on him.
"don't fuck me over again." you said, "or you'll regret it."
"i would never do it on purpose, princess. maybe you should watch where you are going from now on." he bite back in response. he noticed a twitch in your hand, like you wanted to grab him by the front of his driver's suit and pull him close. either for a punch or a kiss.
it would eventually lead in kisses. max liked when you were mad because then that meant he could flip the script and get ferrari's little princess on her knees with a mouthful of verstappen cock. it was honestly cute, while he wanted to dive into your sweet cunt and make your insides sticky with his cum. he'd have to make you acquainted with his size.
max verstappen was fuckin' crazy though, being involved with him was like being a deer and getting your leg caught in a trap. the type of obsession that clamped around you, dug its teeth into your fragile skin. you were so cute though, something some delicate and soft. formula one was for the toughest, the mental and physical strain of it all (that could be why he was so... off). and while max believed in you, he worried.
where you were going, who you were with. you hadn't only been in monaco for a few years and while you had the likes of charles to help you around. when he heard about men you had met, max felt something curl inside of him.
it started inauspicious. he slipped an air tag into the back pocket of your jeans while you were in your driver's room getting ready for dinner with some guy that max couldn't even remember the name of. he was all smiles as he wished you a great time.
too bad there was an issue with your car. how could you have a flat tire already, you just got the car? and when you asked your date to come pick you up, he totally ghosted you. little did you know that while you were struggling with you car, max went to meet your date and give him a few firm words. that was when the real mad max came out.
"listen mate. you're never going to give her what she needs. hell, not even what she wants. there are plenty of fish in the sea." he got a little closer to the other man, "but you can't have her."
"why?" your date swallowed.
max nodded and flashed that winning smile, "because she's mine. and i know she may have talked so nice to you. she's like that. charming. but sadly she's taken. so i think it's in everyone's best interest that you delete her number and go back to finding your perfect match." he patted the man on the shoulder like they were buddies.
"and if i don't."
max's smile only grew, "i don't like people fucking what's mine. she's taken, mate. move on." he couldn't verbalize exactly how he'd rough up the other man. he didn't want to make headlines. but there was something in his gaze that made your date high tail it out of there. your number blocked and deleted.
max then used the air tag to find you at a bar close to your flat where you were drinking away your sorrows. but, don't worry about that! max was now here to make sure that you had the best night ever. while that meant ending up drunk and curled up in his bed, but he didn't mind. he was even a gentleman and created a barrier of pillows between the two of you. no funny business. even if he wanted to. when he eventually fucked you, he wanted you conscious.
that air tag would come in handy, turns out that you wore the same pair of black levi's jeans. max was wondering if he had to get more air tags to place along other items. but, he lucked out with that one. you thought it was a strange coincidence that he seemed to be where you were.
and he'd laugh and tell you, "small city, right?"
it took months of hard work but, eventually he got to sink his pretty cock into your prettier hole. the happiest day of his life. he had invited you on his boat for the afternoon, and while he didn't expect much. he wasn't expecting your pretty tits on such display. a pretty red checkered print bikini and sandals as you stayed close to max.
and then alone, out in the waters. you ended up straddling max's waist while he sat on one of the seats up on the deck. it was couch-like and allowed you two some room as you rubbed your sweet pussy up against the front of his shorts. his hands dug into the plushness of your ass as he moved against you. you were painfully pretty, and it drove max insane. you'd try to run him off the track, but he'd always get an apology by having your pretty tits in his face and your pussy around his cock.
"you feel so good." he said, "you're so soft."
you whimpered, "i'm not that soft. you keep feeding me all this good food since i came to visit! my team is going to be pissed." you squirmed a little.
he kissed at your breasts in front of your face and laughed, "well, then. i guess i'll have to keep feeding you better food." his teeth then nipped your left breast and it made you whine. his hands continued to grope you ass and you squirmed a little more.
you didn't realize that you're movements only made him harder and he had to force himself to let go of you to take his cock out of his shorts. this was a dream come true, after months of being your little shadow.
"you know how to do this?" he asked.
you held onto his shoulders and chuckled, "yes, i've had sex before." which made something cold run through max's body, but it was quickly heated up once more when you sank down on him.
other men might had had you, but he was going to make sure you were his forever. no need to get stuffed with another man's cock, when you have max who, as he might add, can get into you quite easily. it was like you were made for him as you started to ride him. he pulled you into a kiss with one hand while he groped your behind with the other. he felt your core shiver around him as you continued to move up and down on his cock.
this only lit his need for you more. if you were so good on top, how good were you on the bottom, or at your side, or stuffed full of fingers and toys as max pulled orgasm after orgasm out of you. he wanted you, he was mad for you. while he'd sometimes pull dirty tricks on the track, he had a whole other set of skills for you. because he could never hurt you on the track, too much of a risk for your safety. but he'd bruise your little pussy and cover your pretty soft breasts in large bites. he'd hope that cameras would get a good look at the pretty marks.
a lot easier to scare off men than to see a woman decorated with hickies. if he had it his way, you'd be wearing a little chain with his initials on it. or better yet, chubby little verstappen baby at your hip. the thought made something hot run through him. oh, that unlocked something in his brain as he was balls deep inside of you. he continued to leave a mess of bites on your chest as you continued to rut against him. your back arched a little when he bit one of your nipples.
"i need you to burn that bikini when we get to shore." he said between heavy pants as he grabbed your ass roughly and pushed himself up as much as he could go. his voice was a little strained from the intensity of it all.
"why?" you asked as you looked down at you.
"because, someone might get the wrong idea. and i don't want you getting hurt." he replied. it showed off far too much, too much of what belonged to him.
he rubbed up against you further. his cock poking some of your deepest parts, he wondered if he was the biggest you ever had. or if there was some other guy in another part of the world who took you apart better than him. unlikely. the way he watched you wiped drool from the corner of your mouth as you rode him made him excited.
during his time racing alongside you, he had seen you at euphoric highs of victory and deep anger when losing. but, this was a whole other look, you were far from focused. only really thinking about the cock, his cock, stuffing you full. guess there was no need to get you into his clothes and keep an air tag in your bad anymore, not when you had such a sweet look across your face.
he ran his blunt nails down the side of your thighs and felt you clench harder around his cock. which made sparks appear in the back of max's mind.
"pretty thing." he said. there was a softness to you that he wanted to sink his teeth into. especially the slight chub at your hips, next time he wanted to bite down on the skin and leave pretty bruises across it. you were just so beautiful. he thought formula one was for ugly men because they wore a helmet all the time, not pretty women who made max go insane.
you whined a little bit and started to feel yourself really get hot all over. his cock fit in you perfectly. while lust clouded your head, you honestly did think about throwing out the bikini you were wearing on board the boat. he kissed at your pulse point and you moaned, your pussy fluttered around him.
"i need that bikini gone before we get back to shore." he said.
"why, what will i wear?" you asked a little shy. you couldn't get back onto land with nothing on!
he grabbed at your ass once more and pushed you down on his cock, then held you for a moment. his lips were squared with yours as he said, "i got some extra clothes in the bedroom below deck." he knew that it was either red bull or verstappen merchandise. something that he had a lot of and could get wet.
while it wouldn't show off your pretty figure. the idea of you getting a bit chilled while heading 'home' and having your nipples poke through a shirt with his logo on it made him hotter. maybe he'll turn the ac up in the car on the drive home.
"i don't want anyone to see the bikini ever again. i'll buy you something nicer." he said as he thrusted up into you, "i don't want hungry eyes on you and neither do you. you're not a piece of meat." even though max wished to devour you, you were not meat. he'd say you were more like fruit. something refreshing and bright. something to crave on a warm day like today.
"i should have something in my bag." you said as you continued to ride him.
he held your soft hips and looked up at you, "no, no." he said then licked his top lip, "wear my clothes, they'll be more comfortable." and it'll hide your figure better.
you were the first to climax, and he managed to get you across the seat of the couch and fuck you from behind doggy style. perfect angle to make sure every last drop. you clawed at the faux leather and arched your back, your sweet noises against the sounds of the sea. your pussy clenched around him as he bullied the tip up against your cervix.
it was important for the two to get acquainted.
he finally finished inside of you and let out a sweet groan. he clenched onto your hips tightly and watched you go fully limp against the couch as you tried to catch your breath. he pulled out and gooey cum dripped out of your poor pussy. ah, it's okay. he simply pushed it all back inside of you.
with the amount he finished inside of you, you were at least 3% dutch now!
when max was finished with you, he knew that he was going to keep the little princess of ferrari. maybe eventually you'll wear the red bull logo across your pretty tits when you entered the paddock. or maybe better yet, the verstappen last name. but for now he'd simply have to stake his claim by shoving all his cum into your sweet cunt. after all it was a safer place to keep it compared to his own fist.
-
even with the start of the new season. his fixation of your cunt didn't end. so what you're on a different team, that didn't mean he couldn't easily go to the ferrari area and just get you to himself. when you win the first race of the season and sing along to your national anthem, max smiles in second. not because he is happy that you are winning.
but because he knew that his cum was dampening the front of your sweet cotton panties. you may have the trophy over your head, but he knew after this, he'd get another chance to sink another load in you. <3
a/n: is this anything? does anyone want more of this????
#bunny writes#cw: dark themes#reader insert#max verstappen x you#max verstappen x reader#formula one imagine#max verstappen smut#max verstappen#mv33 drabble#mv33 imagine#mv33 x reader#mv33 smut#mv33#mv1 smut#mv1 x reader#driver!reader#f1 driver!reader#max verstappen imagine#mad!max#formula 1#formula one fanfiction#f1 smut#formula one smut#f1 fanfic#f1 rpf#f1 x reader#f1#formula 1 fanfic#formula 1 fic#dark fic
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giggling so bad imagining R shaving her bush and sevika being like oh my god do u hate me?!?! what did I do?!?! how can I make it up to u I'm sorry pleeeeeease never do this again we can talk it out next time please 😭😭
LMAOOO
men and minors dni
last month, your period crept up on you, and you woke up half convinced you'd been stabbed in your sleep.
you and sevika didn't even try to salvage the sheets, just throwing them in the trash before re-making the bed. your pajamas were ruined, and, grossest of all, your crotch was a sticky, bloody mess.
so, this month to avoid any more incidents, you've been sleeping on a towel in anticipation, wearing a pad to bed just in case, and... you've shaved.
you haven't shaved in years. you and sevika are both bush enjoyers, and neither of you have ever felt the need to take a razor to your pits or legs since you started dating. finding a razor to use is almost impossible, but you manage to find one buried in the far back of your bathroom closet.
you feel so... cold. and smooth. you're hyper-aware of the feeling of your underwear rubbing on your skin. it's strange. not unpleasant, but strange. with one last look down your pants at your hair-less pussy, you shrug and crawl into bed.
you think that's the end of it.
you go to sleep easily, waking up about an hour later when sevika crawls in bed behind you. she kisses you gently and you hum, wrapping your arms around her before you both fall asleep.
in the morning, though, you wake up to a horrified gasp.
"what!? what is it, is someone breaking in?" you ask, sitting up in bed and rubbing your eyes. as you pull your hands away, though, you don't find sevika sitting beside you where she should be. she's hovering on top of you on all fours, a horrified look on her face. "sevika, what?!" you ask, your heart pounding in your chest.
"you shaved?!" sevika cries. you blink, your mind still half asleep, before finally looking down at your crotch.
you burst into laughter as you do. sevika's pulled your pants down your thighs in your sleep, clearly trying to give you a nice wake up call, and she's just now seeing your bare cunt. "sevika, for fuck's sake, i thought something horrible happened!" you laugh.
"something horrible has happened! why the fuck did you shave!?" sevika asks, her eyes wide and heartbroken. "d-did i piss you off, or something? whatever it is, baby, i promise i'll make it up to yo--"
"sevika!" you cackle. sevika pouts as she looks up from your pussy to your face. "baby, i shaved because my period's on the way and i didn't wanna deal with the mess again."
sevika's looking at you like you've lost your mind. "wha-- fuck that!" she whines. you chuckle. "what the fuck am i supposed to do when i'm goin' down on you now? my nose is gonna get all cold, i won't have anything to run my fingers through..." sevika looks seriously upset. you giggle just a little at the absurdity of the situation, then reach up to cup her face.
"it'll grow back, baby." you promise. sevika frowns.
"but then you'll just shave it off again!"
"no, i won't babe." you say. "not if you feel this strongly about it. plus, it's a lotta work-- i was scared to death i was gonna cut one of my lips off or something."
sevika chuckles. "thank you." she sighs, kissing your lips. you grin.
"thank you. y'know, most people have to deal with the opposite-- their partners forcin' them to shave before any intimacy at all... i'm glad you prefer the option that requires the least amount of work possible for me."
sevika giggles and kisses you. "i am pretty amazing, aren't i?" she asks. you nod.
"the fuckin' best." you agree.
taglist!
@fyeahnix @lavendersgirl @half-of-a-gay @thesevi0lentdelights @sexysapphicshopowner
@kissyslut @chuucanchuucan @badbye666 @femme-historian @lia-winther
@sevikaspillowprincess @emiliabby @sevikasbeloved @hellorai @my-taintedheart
@glass-apothecary @macaroni676 @artinvain @k3n-dyll @sevsdollette
@ellieslob @xayn-xd @keikuahh @maneskinwh0re @raphaellearp
@iamastar @sevikitty @mascdom @nhaaauyen @annesunshiner
@mirconreadzztuff22 @veoomvroom @lushh-s3vik4s @katyawooga @lesbodietcoke
@lavandasz @strawberrykidneystone @sevikasfan @fict1onallyobsessed
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"Will you overthinking this?" He asked as we were walking hand in hand in the park.
Me, fully aware I have already started overthinking the moment he mentioned that her friend broke off her relationship: "....... juuup"
"What are you overthinking about? Lets discuss it together, let me help"... I explained how, maybe, now that she is single, she might try to get over a guy by getting under another one. Or maybe, since you guys tall about problems and are pretty close, she turns to flirting now that she is single. "Okay and? Why would I get into that while I have my girlfriend at home? I would say no thank you. Also, I don't think she is the person to do that. I have met her before she was in a relationship, and she also wasn't like this then". Okay, well, .. maybe she will have heard bad things about me and will not like me or she will think I am not good enough for you, or too much, and tell you to break up with me. I mean, I'm in a relationship with you, not with her, but ja, well... He put his arms around me and stopped us from walking on, hugging me from behind. "Sometimes I forget how insecure you can be. Do you really think I'll just break up with you because someone tells me to? And besides, I think you should meet her. She is really kind and everytime I mentioned something, she was always more on the reassuring side." Well, I also thought your other friend was kind.. "..... true. ..... I don't have an argument against that."
"So... if she were to still be in a relationship, would it be okay? .. meh, I feel like that's a bad excuse. "Yeah she is in a relationship anyway" , as if that changes anything. Doesn't that sound like a bad thing to you?" Hmm. Well. Honestly, I felt better when she was in a relationship, assuming it wasn't an u know who typa relationship. It's always a 2 people's decision. And that way, I am at least sure that one side is on the no side (as I said it out loud, I realized how fuckedup it sounded.) "Shouldn't you trust me to already be on the no side?" .... I should, yes. I just don't know what to make of the fact that you told me that you can't promise me that it won't happen again. "That was a year ago" .... "back then I wasn't super sure, and before that I was def not sure. Also, I did not want to force you to trust me (def different exact words from his, buthey, u get the point.). It's been a year." Would you get back to it and say something different now then? "Yes. I am sure that it will never happen again".
And there it was. I know he is a firm believer in actions over words, but sometimes I need words to be sure. He told me that he tells me the truth, and I know he does. Thus, if he tells me, I believe him. So. Maybe this is what I needed to truly get to trusting him again. His word. It's not a signed contract, I know. I can't sue him if his words turn out to be false. Though, I needed this. I needed his faith in himself to make sure it won't happen again. Fuck damn hey. I needed him to believe in himself. If he doesn't believe he will stop it the next time, who am I to believe so? Well well well. Before he left, if our roommate wasn't sitting right next to me, I would've said after he asked me if I'm still okay (for like, the 3th time): "if you say it won't happen again, I trust you." Fuck. And I'd mean it. I feel like I have entered a new reality. One in which it is safe for me to have faith in him. In which, sure, maybe a girl will flirt with him, but I can laugh about it. I can be proud to be with that hotstuff that she can't help but talk to. I can make jokes about it and raise my eyebrows up and down. I can do it all, and enjoy the situation, knowing. Truly knowing. That it doesn't matter at all if the other party is on the "yes-boat". He isn't, and he won't get onto it either. Even if a chance presents itself, he won't even see it as one. He has the set in stone plan to come back home to me. Even if she would get him drunk and touch him all over, ... he will say no. Even if it scares me more with booze, he is still himself. He doesn't get into a crazy trans and turns into a different person with different values. He is still the same person who held my hand as we walked in the autumn colored park, and said that it would never happen again.
It feels like something in me has been freed. As if trust was a fluffy creature within me, which was tied down. His words freed it. It still can't believe that the tiny trust guy is free. That it's safe to stand up now and run and smile and truly trust. It's astonished, grasping for those words that set it free. Wanting to hold them and craving for them to invade its veins with its lightning energy and brightness. May it no longer feel the need to stay on the ground; the ties have been undone. Fuck.
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So like, let’s say the Oracle was outside of the palace and went to an area in the city, or outside the city on an errand or something. Then the Oracle comes back covered in rotten food and dirt, and bleeding from there forehead because the area they went to was not to….lets say welcoming to Oracle. And by that I mean classic middle age fashion, throw stuff at people(demons) that they are weary of to make them leave. But Oracle didn’t do anything. Didn’t react even after getting rained on by garbage and rocks. Just letting them do whatever and went about their day. However when they got back to the palace Oracle tried to rinse off the evidence in like a near by pond or something so as not to offend others noses. Oracle just thinking THEY must have done something to offend them not the bigger problem of getting trash thrown at you😅
What are the RO doing?
This story takes up my thoughts🫶
Omg. That's so sad... But also not out of the realm of possibilities.
Vez, Os, and Laz will find every demon who was on that street and give a threatening lesson to them. For Vez, it's important that you're safe, not just because they care about you, but because it's also their responsibility, and they'll do everything they can to make sure this doesn't happen again with you or anyone else. Laz is doing that solely to protect you and you alone. If they need to put some fear into the general public to dissuade it from making your life harder, then they will. Os's reasoning is both of these.
Ash and Az will focus on you firstly. Comfort you and tell you how wrong those demons were and that this is nothing you should get used to or suffer through. Once your conversation is finished, they'll go to Vez and ask them for a favor, which will lead to the upper scenario with finding the culprits and making them pay for the trouble.
Though, in this scenario Vez would be bound to do some lecturing even if no one asked them. Even you weren't in a good relationship with them, they still wouldn't allow others to mistreat someone like this. The culprits will be brought to court with real charges that will keep bringing them trouble for a long time because Vez wants to make an example out of them and discourage everyone else from copying this behavior. You'll get personal protectors too.
There's definitely some talking they all will need to do with you because you shouldn't consider that incident normal and hide it from them. They all are upset in one way or another because of the unjust treatment you got and how you view it.
Thank you for the ask 💛 I'm glad you like the story!
#the abyssal song#asks#interactive game#interactive novel#twine wip#tas: vez#tas: os#tas: laz#tas: ash#tas: az
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My thing about Veth potentially venturing into polyamory is that I do think everyone involved would be perfectly fine with it and happy to help her experiment, and I think that no matter how they do it, it would not fix her. This isn't to say that she wouldn't get any benefit out of trying! It's just to say that it's not a solution to her actual problem, because I genuinely don't think the problem is that she's lacking any one thing that would make her life complete.
Fundamentally, I think Veth struggles with the idea that there will come a point at which she has to settle. Not in a bad way, just in the sense that she is one person with one life and she will have to live within those bounds. Because the thing is, I don't really think her issue ends at struggling to "have it all"; to an extent she does! She is a good parent, even if her kid is a little rebellious; her marriage is supportive (and has fun sex); she gets to go off to save the world with Yeza's blessing on occasion, when the world needs saving. She doesn't have all of these things all the time, but... that's not really a flaw, that's just a fact of life.
But she started out her adult life settling to an extent—even if she loved Yeza and loved being Luc's mom, she did the safe thing that was expected of her. The goblin attack and everything that transpired after shoved her out of that life, but in retrospect, to an extent it likely feels that that pushed her to find something more that she wouldn't have had otherwise. Being pushed to her limit under the worst conditions made her better, stronger, braver, and at the end of it she found that she could have both her original life and much of her new life—so why wouldn't she then wonder if further experiences of that ilk could do the same?
Crucially, she has not actually run up against a hard limit yet, and as such she hasn't had reason to believe that there is a point at which she has to stop and recognize that there isn't more for her to find. When she was drinking more heavily during missions, even when it caused the death of herself or others, there were no long-term consequences. And the thing is, I'm not saying that she should face that kind of major consequence, but she seems as though she is scared to accept that maybe she could be happy if she stopped before she does.
I'm also not suggesting that she should stop experimenting or trying new things—the Luxon knows I am not one to talk in that realm—but I do think she is searching for novelty not because that would make her happy, but because she doesn't believe that she has the capacity to know what would make her happy. She was unaware that polyamory was even an option, so think of what else she might not be aware of! She doesn't have perfect knowledge of the world, after all, so how can she trust that she's found what she really wants? So yeah, she could fuck someone else, and it might even be an enjoyable experience that she didn't know was missing! But that only prolongs the question of what else she might be missing.
I think that deep down, she's terrified that if she doesn't keep pushing until that external hard limit, she will end up with regrets later, and simultaneously she is resentful that her friends all seem to have reached a point where they are largely content with what they have, because she wants them to have everything. She wants herself to have everything. And she has not yet allowed herself to come to terms with the fact that only she can determine when the everything of what she already has is enough, and anything else is the cherry on top.
#but also she should still try polyamory. because it'd be very funny.#I just think she should corner essek with a knife after sleeping with caleb like 'SURELY YOU WEREN'T ACTUALLY OKAY WITH THAT YOU LIAR'#(because she still feels guilty and unsatisfied and she couldn't possibly be the one keeping herself from being content. nosiree lmao.)#but in all seriousness hilariously I think she should talk to essek about it cuz I think he would actually relate most lmao#and he does seem to be doing well with it! like he's living within the bounds of what will keep him alive sure#but he's also doing so in such a way that's like#I can't have my cake and eat it too but I can be content eating the cake#like look. as an essek girlie. do you think I do not relate lmao. BUT the important point is that it really is up to you#you can do what you want forever! but you also have to live with that.#critical role#cr spoilers#cr meta#veth brenatto
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"She used to be," he answered honestly, "We were together for a very long time and we both climbed through the ranks as we went. It wasn't until after Sloane tried to sacrifice me the first time that we didn't really work together much and she got herself a job in HR." Theo almost lamented, he missed working with Samantha and he wished he could have a simple desk job in Delta Green. But he was a walking, talking threat magnet and he understood why that couldn't be. He realised what she was checking though and he was sure to add on, "She's only ever a phone call away." He smiled a little to himself, so grateful for her friendship.
"Thank you," he said of her reassurance she would tell him, even if it had worries with it. "I've seen and been through a lot, I can probably handle it, but if an episode is triggered, that's for me to deal with. I'd rather know what's happening and take that risk." It might not be the best way of doing things but at least Violet could have that support and if he needed it, he could get it through Delta Green. "I can go to official channels if I need help, you have me and while I will always do my best for you, you can and should be able to rely on me to be there for you... lectures and all."
She asked about the organisation finding out about what The Horned One had done to her and potentially trying to use it or view her as an unnatural threat that needed to be terminated. He thought of the many cultist agents in his past. "There is not an evil, cultist or otherwise bone in your body," he told her gently. "I don't recommend revealing what's happening to anyone else, but you know what cultists are like, you've met enough of them." He tried to reassure her as best he could but she was right to be wary of Delta Green. "Just keep it to yourself, ask for help from me or Samantha and only face to face with us somewhere like here or outside where no one can listen in."
He worried he was scaring her though, he knew from an outsider's perspective what it was he would think and do but he supposed in that sense he could protect her from anyone like him too. "Do you understand why it is I don't want you working for them? Even in a role you think you want, it's not something you might get." He knew she wanted to build traps but Delta Green didn't work like that very often, she needed someone to show what she could do and that came in trial and error in field work, unless he or Samantha could pull strings.
𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐎 & 𝐕𝐈𝐎𝐋𝐄𝐓 @multipleoccupancy
A team of agents... like the agents she had seen in the mines. But none of those agents had made it out of the mines alive. Violet's chest tightened. "Is Samantha with you during field missions? Like in Ophir?" From what she had seen, Samantha seemed to always have the right words. It would be a comfort, to know that she was out there with her dad, to help him and talk to him. Besides, she knew her dad was not going to agree to talk to a therapist any time soon. She was still surprised (and touched) that he was even willing to accompany her to Dr. Parrish's office.
Violet didn't want to lie to her dad. And she knew that she needed to tell him about her travels, because only he understood, and it was hard enough to keep everything hidden from the rest of the family. But she also didn't want to break him again. The thought alone made her blood turn to ice. She nodded anyway. "I'll tell you, but... what if I trigger another episode?" She'd never forgive herself. She was already not really forgiving herself for what had happened four days ago.
"That's good," she smiled, "that you and Samantha changed things. You're keeping people safe from monsters and from Delta Green. Like that, no one will ever go through what you went through." And that, of course, included her. But she wasn't completely reassured, still. Even upon knowing that Layla's body would never be discovered, her shoulders stayed stiff, and her eyebrows furrowed.
"What if they find out I can travel? Will they think I'm a cultist? And- and if they find out Wiley gave me my powers?" Violet had no doubt about it now: the Program was a dangerous organization. And even if their recruitment methods had changed, that didn't mean they couldn't be a threat to her. Her dad had said it herself, they had threatened the entire family!
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Okay people, I need to talk about IDOL!Shen Yuan AU before I explode (aka slight Aggretsuko inspired office au…..)
I’ll try to make this short for once jdvfhbjdhbvdf, but basically SY has been (forcefully) made to work for his brother(SJ) in the family company, after SJ decided enough was enough, and SY was going to do something with his life besides rotting away in his bed whether he liked it or not. The thing is, he wasn’t (just) rotting in bed reading atrocious novels, but he also took some time to experiment with music as a hobby, and over time, he grew a small following.
Though, after he was dragged to work at SJ’s side, the ever boring of dealing with paperwork and staring at white walls was eating at him. It’s not like he struggled doing his job, in fact, he was quite good at it, but he wasted no effort to make it very clear that he did not like that he was there in the first place. So, in an act of rebellion and to just do SOMETHING other than feel every passing second of the day in a cubicle, he decided to work even harder in his music hobby. It eventually led to SJ finding out and sparing no words to say that SY needed to focus on his real job, which only made SY brat out even harder, even managing to find an alternative music club and booking a few performances.
It went great! More people showed up than he expected, and all went great, but since his health was still not the best, after that he basically spent a whole month crashed out, not being able to do any more performances and barely able to go to the office once a week.
Anyways, it all led to SY thinking he had proved SJ right that he couldn’t continue this life style, and even thinking about quitting it, but one day while he was scrolling on the comments on one of his MVs (aka a Fancy Lyric Video), one of the comments mentioned that SY was one of the most important influences for that person, and that it inspired them to start pursuing music. It was the first time he had received a comment of that nature, and it lit the fire of his motivation back up.
Some 2 years passed, SJ still kept SY at the office, but SY had reached a nice balance on his online music work and performances on that club, and as his popularity grew, his performances at that one club had almost turned into a whole event for his most dedicated fans. So, enter Luo Binghe:
He was that comment that SY had read, and he did want to try music after being a fan of SY’s for almost three years now, but due to his financial situation he desperately needed some other source of income first. Now, at his last year of college, he managed to get an internship onto the Shen family’s company, which was a huge step forward towards his dreams, unfortunately he just had to go under SJ, which as we all know, was never kind to Binghe, instead acting as if the boy should just give up the internship entirely. And Binghe did think about it, but it seemed as if the stars had aligned for Binghe at least once, and SJ, after getting a sudden influx of work, delegated Binghe to SY.
They got on quite well, and Binghe even grew to have a little crush on SY, but it was all going fine and great until one fateful day. The office was as boring as ever, and after SY let Binghe know they wouldn’t have to entertain any clients for the day, Binghe decided to work on his part while listening to some music of his favorite artist.
Binghe has an awful habit of listening to music worryingly loud, so when SY went to get him to explain his new task, he ended up listening to what Binghe was hearing: his own music, in fact, his newest song. He pondered telling Binghe about the coincidence, but decided that maybe would be overstepping some professional boundary, and instead told Binghe about his one music club SY had heard about…
Binghe, excited to get to know more places around the area (and maybe understanding what SY did in his free time), decided to go to the club the next week after work, and did not even think about checking who would be performing in the day he would visit. Imagine his surprise when he gets to the door of the music club and hears some awfully famíliar music, and after rushing to be as close to the stage as possible, besides being blinded by his favorite artist’s greatness, also noticed that, hey, the artist looked an awful lot like a certain coworker of his….
Anyways, shenanigans ensue, Binghe starts his own investigation on SY possibly being the artist, SY juggling his office life, music career, and SJ perhaps coming to accept his brother’s career, and even maybe revealing a bit about his own past with music performances.
That’s all I had for today, just wanted to release this into the world! If anyone wants to expand on this, or try their on take on it, feel more than free to! Here are some more doodles of the usual day at the office :)
#had to stop myself from yapping away#the aggretsuko inspiration comes more in the way I think sy could go all out on the metal screams lol#binghe is probably gonna become an idol later#svsss#shen yuan#shen jiu#shen qingqiu#luo binghe#bingyuan#drabble#long post#digital art#doodles
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Love Language (Jason Todd x Reader)
Prompt: Jason Todd with a gift giving love language
Jason Todd wasn’t the best good at- capable of expressing feelings of affection. Maybe it was just a byproduct of having skipped most of his adolescence, what with the interruption of being buried alive then resurrected in green goop. But whatever, maybe that was just speed running his character development.
What’s not so nice however, is that he’s missed out on those teen years of fumbling through relationship firsts. Sure, maybe they’d be awkward, and he’d look back and laugh at those memories today. But part of him feels like those adolescent years would be far more forgiving towards hesitant confessions and embarrassing slip ups.
Now he’s having to navigate it all as an adult. Unfortunately, it’s not all smooth sailing for Jason, what with his twin quest for revenge and justice blocking out most of his schedule.
The thing is, he has no issues knowing what affection should feel like. He’s experienced the butterflies in his stomach, his throat lodging up because he’s afraid he’ll say the wrong thing, sneaking glances and immediately averting his eyes when he gets caught admiring you.
He’s experienced the pre-date nerves, having to stare down the mirror to convince himself he’s got this (why is it so much easier to punch a bad guy then tell you that your hair looks nice??)
And he’s also experienced the post-date embarrassments, replaying moments where he felt like a total dunce cause of something he said without thinking (he swears up and down he was not being raunchy when he said he likes sleeping with you. He meant it in the literal sense! Your presence helps lull him to sleep)
No, he definitely has no issues in experiencing sentiments of love and affection. But man does he struggle expressing said feelings.
He’s not sure he’s the best at communicating his fondness towards you. At least not with words, given his tendency to put his foot in his mouth when it comes to matters of the heart.
He’s come to realize while he may not be the best with words, he’s a good listener with a keen eye for detail.
Er- okay, perhaps he could have a keener eye for detail, but hey a man’s gotta have his Achilles heel right?
And that is exactly why he’s stood in the living room right now, with three different pairs of vintage sunglasses neatly laid out on the coffee table in front of you.
His stiffens a bit at your questioning gaze before clearing his throat.
“So, do you remember last week, when you were helping me out with groceries and we passed that vintage charity shop on the way back to my place?”
You do have a vague recollection of passing by a well decorated store selling accessories and other Knick-knacks. You nod as you briefly recall pointing it out to him.
He takes your nod as a sign to continue, “Right so, you had pointed out the store, and I recall you admiring a pair of sunglasses at the window display… you said you’d buy it when you get your next pay cheque. But I thought I’d surprise you with it instead”.
Right, well you are surprised, so that bit was accomplished. Though you can’t help but note how he talks in terms of a singular pair, yet there are three (very stylish) pairs of sunglasses in front of you. So you were surprised and confused.
You look back at him, the question on your lips. But the slump of his shoulders and grumbled huff escaping him tells you he’s already figured out what you’re gonna ask.
“Now look, I remembered the shop… I just couldn’t recall which pair you were talking about. So I- uh, I bought all three of them”.
‘Great. Now she’s gonna think I’ve got the memory of a goldfish and make poor financial decisions’
Jason barely suppresses a groan at the thought, averting his gaze in embarrassment.
“Look I think you’d look good in all of them, so yeah… I mean at the very least you like one of them right?” He asks, his voice faltering towards the end as he begins to doubt whether this was a good idea to begin with.
You barely suppress a laugh at his predicament. Of course he’d do this. Instead of just asking you, he’d rather just buy all three pairs to surprise you.
Your mind flashes back to all the times he’s voiced concern that he’s not expressive enough of his feelings towards you, worried that it would drive a rift between the two of you.
But you know that’s not true at all. He does care, he cares a lot. He’s just got a different love language, one that fits him all too well.
You shake your head with a smile as you rise up from the sofa, walking over to engulf him in a tight hug.
“You’re such a goof you know that?” You mumble against his shirt. Jason mutters in protest though he wraps his arms around you without missing a beat.
You lean back to see his face, a bright smile adorning your features, “Thank you I love them, all of them. And I love you” you declare before pecking his cheek.
A short laugh escapes him at your actions. He takes a moment to drink in your happy smile before proceeding to flick your forehead.
“Ow! What was that for?”
“I’m no goof”
“Oh you’re not? Is that why you technically bought one pair of sunnies for the price of three?”
He rolls his eyes at your teasing, deciding not to respond lest he implicates himself further.
So maybe words of affirmation aren’t his thing, and maybe it will take him a bit longer to respond back with ‘I love you too’.
But that’s not to say that Jason Todd isn’t completely and hopelessly smitten with you.
—————————————————————————
God he’s so fun to write, a total deer in the headlights when he’s in love.
Should I try this with other love language prompts? Lmk if you have any suggestions!
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DOUBLE LIFE
DOUBLE LIFE MASTERLIST
𓂃⊹ ִֶָ summary: With your anonymous Twitter account, you've acquired a pretty good following and popularity, throughout your school as well. Jake, your long-time crush, is one of them, head over heels. Yet when you once confessed to him, he had rejected your confession, saying that he already has his eye on someone else. What happens when he finds out that his online crush is the person that he rejected? And... How are you going to deal with this?
𓂃⊹ ִֶָ word count: ~2.1k
THIRTY SIX - Hey
The door creaks open and Jake practically stumbles inside, shoulders hunched from the cold. You quickly step aside as he hastily walks around, before closing the door behind him.
"Jesus, it's freezing," he mutters, rubbing his arms before suddenly freezing in place. He turns around, facing you properly for the first time in what feels like forever.
"Hey," he says, voice softer now.
"Hi," you reply with a small, uncertain smile, one hand rubbing your arm nervously. You're drowning in fluffy pajamas, your hair falling messily around your face, and even with slightly flushed cheeks from the fever, you're...
Jake has to remind himself to breathe.
"Oh, um," you gesture to the bouquet he's still clutching, "the flowers..."
"Right! The flowers. I, uh..." He looks down at the colourful bundle like he's forgotten he's holding them. "I got them because... well, remember when we were talking about favourite flowers? When you said- I mean, when everythingblue said- or, no, when you said..."
He takes a breath, starting over.
He's rambling now, words tumbling out faster than he can control them. "I didn't actually know which one was really your favourite. You gave such different answers, so... I just... got them all? Which probably looks ridiculous now that I think about it, but the florist was really nice about it, even though it was almost closing time, and-"
He stops abruptly, realizing he's been talking non-stop. A faint blush creeps up his neck.
"I just... wanted to get them right this time." He sighs out while his eyes flicker between you and anywhere else.
"It probably looks like a mess," Jake continues, shifting his weight from one foot to the other. "The florist tried to make it look nice but I kept adding more and-"
You can't help but smile as you watch him ramble. It's endearing, really. The way his hands move slightly while holding the bouquet, how his ears are turning pink (and not just from the cold), how he keeps glancing between you and the flowers like he's not sure where to look. This is a side of Jake you've never seen before. Nervous, a little unsteady, words tumbling out unfiltered.
This is the same boy who could expertly control a football, who always seemed so composed in school, now standing in your hallway just before midnight, clutching a mismatched bouquet and rambling about flower arrangements of all things.
"Jake," you cut in softly, and he stops mid-sentence, looking at you with those wide eyes. "I like them. Really. The fact that you remembered all of those random flowers I mentioned months ago..." You trail off, feeling your own cheeks warm slightly. "Thank you."
He lets out a small breath, shoulders relaxing just a fraction. "Oh," he says, and there's that tiny smile tugging at the corner of his mouth. "Good. That's... good."
The silence that follows feels heavy, and you find yourself fidgeting with your sleeve. "You must be freezing," you blurt out. "Do you want a blanket? Or I could make some tea? I always have some ready and-"
"Actually," Jake interrupts, his expression shifting to something more determined (though the effect is somewhat ruined by his pink-tipped nose from the cold).
"You're the one who needs to be taking care of yourself. Sunghoon told me you haven't been eating properly, and YOU should be resting, wrapped up in blankets, not walking around in the rain, and definitely not eating ice cream at midnight-"
His hands are moving everywhere as he talks, the bouquet swinging dangerously through the air with each gesture. You watch the flowers wobble precariously as he continues,
"-and what were you thinking sitting at a bus stop for an hour? You could have called- anyone would have picked you up, you know that right? And-"
You reach out instinctively, steadying his flower-wielding hand with your own. "Jake."
He freezes mid-gesture, words dying in his throat as his eyes flicker between your hand on his and your face. You can practically see his brain short-circuiting, mouth slightly open, caught mid-word.
"You're going to make the flowers fly away," you say softly.
"Oh," he breathes out, then swallows hard. "Right. Yes. The flowers. Flying. I mean- not flying. They shouldn't fly." He takes a deep breath, seemingly trying to collect his scattered thoughts.
"What I was trying to say is... I'm not exactly a chef or anything, but I make pretty decent ramen. Would you... would you eat something if I made it?"
You can't help but smile at his earnest expression, at how he's standing in your hallway offering to make you ramen, at how he's still letting you steady his hand.
"Okay," you sigh, fond exasperation colouring your voice.
"I'll just put these in water first, alright?"
The kitchen falls into a comfortable silence, broken only by the soft bubbling of water on the stove and the quiet snips of scissors as you trim the flower stems.
Jake busies himself with unpacking the ramen, three different flavours because he wasn't sure which one you'd prefer so he decided to just mix them, trying not to make it obvious how his eyes keep drifting to you.
But they do. They always have.
There's something about seeing you like this - hair slightly messy, drowning in oversized pajamas with little stars on them, careful fingers handling each flower like it's precious. It's so different from how he usually sees you around school, yet somehow exactly the same. The same gentle attention you give to everything, whether it's editing photos or arranging flowers or just... existing in this quiet midnight moment.
You're humming something under your breath, probably not even aware you're doing it, and Jake finds himself holding his own breath, afraid to disturb this moment.
You look so... at home. So real.
He watches as you gently touch a daisy petal, adjusting its position in the vase with such care that something in his chest aches. It hits him then, how much he's missed this, missed you, even the parts he didn't know existed until now.
The water starts boiling more vigorously behind him, snapping him back to reality.
Right. Ramen.
He's supposed to be making ramen, not standing here like an idiot, watching you arrange flowers with what he's sure is the most embarrassingly soft expression on his face.
But he can't help stealing one more glance, memorizing how you look in this moment, slightly fever-flushed but smiling, surrounded by the flowers he brought, looking so perfectly, wonderfully real.
"How's it going?" you ask, turning away from the now-arranged flowers.
"Almost ready," Jake responds, quickly pretending he wasn't just staring. "Just waiting for the noodles to cook properly."
You hum, moving towards the fridge. "Want me to add some eggs? Make it a proper meal?" You're already pulling them out before he can answer, and he watches as you move around your kitchen with familiar ease, grabbing a smaller pan and some vegetables.
Jake tries to focus on stirring the ramen, he really does, but his eyes keep wandering back to you.
Your hair keeps falling in your face, and each time you brush it back with the back of your wrist, careful not to touch it with your cooking hands...
"The water's boiling over," you say without looking up.
"What? Oh- shit-" Jake quickly turns down the heat, feeling his ears burn as he realizes he's been caught not paying attention.
But when he glances back at you, there's a small smile playing at the corners of your mouth as you continue chopping, and somehow that makes his embarrassment worth it.
He should probably say something, make conversation, but there's something so peaceful about this moment.
The tips of his ears are still pink, but he can't help stealing another glance. Just one more.
You carefully balance your bowl as you lead the way upstairs, Jake following a few steps behind. When you push open your bedroom door, he pauses in the doorway, taking everything in.
"This is..." he trails off, eyes wandering from the fairy lights strung across your wall to the polaroids scattered on your corkboard. "Okay, it's weird seeing your room in real life. I mean, I've seen parts of it in your photos, but-"
"Jake," you interrupt, settling cross-legged on your bed with your bowl, "if you say it like that, it sounds like you've been stalking me."
"What- no! I meant- I just-" he sputters, then catches your teasing smile. "Oh, you're making fun of me."
"Maybe a little," you admit, patting the space next to you.
He hesitates for a moment before carefully sitting down, trying not to spill his ramen. The silence that falls feels thick with everything unsaid, the only sound being the soft clink of chopsticks against bowls. Jake's hyper-aware of every movement. How close you're sitting, how your shoulder almost brushes his when you reach for a tissue, how your room smells like vanilla and something floral and you.
"This is pretty good," you say softly, breaking through his thoughts.
The tension in his shoulders eases slightly.
"Yeah?" he asks, and he's not just asking about the ramen.
You nod, giving him another small smile, and something in his chest unclenches just a bit more.
With the empty bowls set aside on your nightstand, the silence creeps back in. You're suddenly very aware of everything.
"Oh, right," Jake says suddenly, reaching for his bag. "I brought some... stuff." He starts pulling things out, setting them on your bed with careful enthusiasm.
"Some chocolate - which I know probably isn't great when you're sick, but Sunghoon mentioned you've been eating ice cream anyway, so I figured... And medicine, because fever, obviously. And this-"
He pulls out a small box with a Lego flower set logo. "I saw this and thought... since you like flowers..."
The keychain on his bag catches your eye as he moves - a small plushie, gently swaying with his movements. It's identical to the one sitting behind you besides your pillow. Your throat feels tight suddenly.
"Jake," you say softly, reaching out to still his hands that are still pulling things from his bag, seemingly endless. He freezes at the contact, and when he looks up, your eyes meet.
The fairy lights reflect in his dark eyes, creating tiny constellations, and you're close enough to see the slight flutter of his eyelashes as he blinks.
There's that familiar awkward tension again, but it's different now. Softer somehow, more delicate. Like you're both holding your breath, waiting for something neither of you can name.
A strand of hair falls in your face, and Jake's fingers twitch like he wants to brush it away, but he doesn't.
Instead, he just looks at you, really looks at you, in a way that makes your heart stumble over itself.
You're both so quiet you can hear the gentle hum of your heater, the distant sound of cars outside, the slight rustle of the bag's zipper as it finally settles.
It's strange, you think, how someone can feel like both a stranger and the most familiar person in the world all at once.
Your hand is still on his, and Jake swears his heart actually stops for a second when you say his name like that, so soft and careful, like it's something precious.
He's spent so long being angry, being hurt, but right now, with you looking at him in the gentle glow of your fairy lights, hair messy and cheeks still slightly flushed from fever...
"You're really pretty," he murmurs before he can stop himself.
You let out a surprised laugh, pulling your hand back to cover a small cough. "I am literally coughing up a storm," you say, looking down at your attire. "I look a mess."
"No, you don't," Jake says, too quickly, too honestly. The words hang in the air between you.
His eyes can't seem to stay still - taking in how your hair falls around your face, flickering to the way your lips part slightly in surprise at his bluntness. You look soft and close enough that he can see your soft breaths, and his heart is doing something dangerous in his chest.
Then you cough again, small but enough to remind him that you're sick, that this probably isn't the time for... whatever his heart is trying to do right now.
Jake clears his throat, reaching for the Lego box perhaps a bit too quickly.
"Want to make this together?" he asks, voice slightly rougher than usual. It's an escape route, a way to ease the tension that's been building, to quiet the loud beating of his heart that he's sure you must be able to hear.
But when you smile and nod, scooting closer to look at the box, he thinks maybe his heart isn't going to quiet down anytime soon.
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#enhypen imagines#enhypen#enhypen au#enhypen jake#enhypen jay#enhypen heeseung#enhypen sunghoon#enhypen sunoo#enhypen jungwon#enhypen niki#sim jaeyun#sim jake#enhypen smau#smau#jjangwonie#jjangwonie double life#enhypen angst#jake angst
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Her name is Alana De Riva. She was a slave in Tevinter, but got freed and joined the Antiva Crows after she helped Viago(pre-talon) get in her former master's mansion to assassinate him.
She is chaotic good. Sometimes too chaotic, sometimes too good
Elf and mage
Possibly in Antiva, maybe captured by the Antaam after she freed their prisioners
It's a mix between the postive one and the joking one
Bellara, Neve, Harding and Taash
Lucanis
None one really, poor thing has zero sense of self preservation
She loves the crows, they are the only family she has known and its very grateful for the part they played on her fleeing slavery but Viago fears she is too soft for the job sometimes and that might be her downfall
No, but she has sweet singing voice, nothing professional or anything but she used to sing to the others slaves to soothe them and does the same for the crows fledglings after they had particulary tough training day
Dagger and orb - she is not picky about which one
She is very curious and experimental, don't think she has come to a conclusion on that matter
It's her job. She will enjoy it though if she thinks someone desarves it.
She hadn't have much time for hobbies since she pretty much went from being slave, to crow training to save the world from elven gods but since she moved to Antiva she is been training to learn how to draw and paint. She wants to paint the landscapes at night.
Viago is big brother to her (or maybe like a grumpy dad?) and she looks up to Teia. She is also as close as one can get to the current Heir from the crows bc they were recruited at the same time and trained together. She got super starstruck when she met Dorian because she remembered her master's hatred of him, she admired him for speaking up against slavery in Tevinter ever since. She hates the first warden guts. And she can't forgive Illario after what he put Lucanis through, even if he does.
After meeting Assan, Griffons, for sure. I have a headcanon that she often visits his brothers and sisters in Arlathan forest and even bonded with one of them
Yes, she is very thankful for get the chance to see all the world because it's something she never thought she'd be able to do as a slave.
Probably working with the crows, trying to think of way to end the Antaam occupation.
Probably because she was too good for her own good. Doing some not so well thought out selfless, self sacrificing act. Viago will be pissed.
She would fight him, but like, try to talk things over first for the Inquisitor's sake.
She is specially proud of her eletric magic because it is effective and she manages to wield it with some flair (as a crow should)
Tevinter and Antivan. She knows some elven and curse words in Qunari that Taash taught her
She would try to be optimistic and push through the crises so when it's finally over I think she has no energy to do anything. After the events of the endgame she might need a few days in bed, cuddling with Lucanis before she can function again
She is not very spiritual or religious, so no. She caught some mannerism and habits from the Andrastian faith but isn't a firm believer herself.
Spell blade, she incorporates her crow training to her magic fighting style.
A tiny and energetic dog, will bite you and cuddle with you with the same passion
She had just turned into a full fledged crow, so there was a lot of being (happily) bossed around by Viago
She considers heself the leader but listen to everyone and specially asks Harding for advise since she had been working with Verric the longest and also has the experience in the Inquisition
The shadow dragons, she'd love to help free other slaves. She'd have a great time with the Lords of Fortune too.
She is kind, didn't let the cruelty and horrors she experience turn her bitter. She is full of life and face the worlds with an open chest and open heart
Rook Questionnaire
inspired by @cassieuncaged's BG3 Character Development Questions but for Rook instead!
1: Where in the Thedas is your Rook from?
2: What is your character's alignment?
3: Race and subclass?
4: If your Rook was a companion, where would they be found?
5: What emotion did they usually pick?
6: What companion are you platonically close with?
7: Romantically close with?
8: Who are they suspicious of?
9: Does your Rook get along with their chosen Faction?
10: Are they proficient in playing any instruments?
11: Weapon of choice?
12: What is their orientation?
13: What are their thoughts on killing? Is it a necessary evil or do they enjoy it?
14: What hobbies does your Rook have?
15: What NPCs do they like? Which one's do they dislike?
16: Do they have a favorite creature in the Thedas?
17: Do they enjoy life as an adventurer?
18: What would your Rook be doing if they weren't recruited by Varric?
19: How do you think they'll meet their end?
20: Would they side with Solas or fight him?
21: What is your Rook's favorite ability?
22: What languages is your character fluent in?
23: What do they do after an absolute crisis?
24: Does your character believe in the afterlife?
25: What specialization best represents your Rook?
26: What animal best represents your Rook?
27: What was their life like before the events of Veilguard?
28: Is your character the de facto leader of the party? Or do they consider someone else to be the leader?
29: If you could choose a different faction for your Rook, which one would they have joined and why?
30: What's your favorite thing about your Rook?
#dragon age#or ask me!#veilguard#rook#lucanis x rook#rookanis#dragon age the veilgaurd spoilers#crow!rook#antivan crows#viago de riva#lucanis dellamorte#dragon age lucanis#lucanis romance
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pairing ✭ sub!soobin x afab!reader
synopsis ✭ soobin just wants you to come home. he misses you so so much. but you left your panties on the bed...so maybe he'll be okay.
content/genre ✭ smut
word count ✭ 1k
notes ✭ this is a rewrite of one of my yunho fics 🤭
warnings ✭ smut, panty sniffing ☺️, mommy kink, sub soobin, dirty talk (mc calls soobin a whore & slut), masturbation
MDNI 18+ BLOG -> ageless blogs and minors WILL BE BLOCKED
He knew he shouldn’t call you in the middle of the day. You were out with friends, getting lunch and shopping. He didn’t need to be by your side at every waking moment…but actually he did.
The bed felt so cold without you. No amount of blankets could replicate your touch. But he needed to let you be. It was noon anyway. He should probably get out of bed.
So…he called you. And it rang. And rang. And rang until eventually the tune faded and he was left with his own wildly impure thoughts. He could stop thinking about you. How good you had smelt after you’d spritzed your perfume in the bathroom. How good your legs had looked under that skirt. How gently you’d kissed him before you left.
Pressing a hand to his chest and pressing your freshly glossed lips to his own, “Be a good boy for me while I’m gone, okay?”
He’d only nodded breathlessly before retreating to your bed and burying himself in your fluffy blankets. Bringing one of them up to his face and inhaling the scent of your shampoo and fabric softener that clung to the fabric. He could already feel himself getting unbearably hard.
And when you hadn’t picked up, he’d only gotten more and more needy. When he tossed his phone down next to him, though, he caught something out of the corner of his eye.
Fuck.
You’d left a pair of panties on the bed. The ones you had just changed out of before you left. The light blue fabric printed with little bows was taunting him.
He should put them in the laundry. Clean them for you. And let you kiss him on the forehead and call him a good boy for helping you out.
But they were so close. It was just so easy to take them. Keep them. Hide them in a special place. He should’ve felt more guilty. Where was that nervous knot in his stomach that kept him from doing stupid shit? Was this a boundary he really wanted to cross?
He reached across the bed and pinched the waistband, caressing the fabric with his thumb and dragging it closer to him. “Fuck,” he groaned softly as he gingerly picked them up.
It was so wrong of him. Why was he acting this way? Like some kind of sex-depraved creep. He was your boyfriend for fucks sake. You buried his cock deep in your pussy nearly every day. Riding him and draining him dry. Leaving him a babbling whimpering mess every night before kissing his cheeks and caressing his hair until he inevitably fell asleep in your arms.
And was here returning the favor by burying his nose in your panties, whimpering at the scent of you left on them. He finally pulled his aching cock out of his shorts (he always forwent underwear in the house). The precum leaking out of the tip was more than enough to lube himself up as he teased himself. Starting the pumps painfully slow. Grazing a finger over the underside.
He was a whining mess. Whimpering into your panties, picturing you sitting on his face. He imagined you breathing in his ear.
I thought you were gonna be my good boy?
No? You’re gonna be a little whore, aren’t you.
It’s ok~ Mommy likes needy little sluts anyway.
He shuttered at the thought of your breath on his neck. Degrading him just like he deserved, “Hmmm, mommy,” he whimpered, “‘M sorry–fuck–’m sorry mommy.”
The words came out as barely coherent babbles that he choked out between breaths. Pumping his cock desperately and erratically in his fist just to get a fraction of the feel of you.
He brought the panties down to his cock and rolled over onto his stomach. He gripped your pillow for dear life, moaning and sobbing into it as he furiously jerked himself off. The control he had over himself was wearing thin. He kept grinding into your mattress, too. Trying to give himself just a little more friction.
It was so overwhelming and underwhelming at the same time. Everything smelt like you. The pillow, the sheets, the blankets tangled between his legs. But nothing felt quite like you. Not his fist, not the panties, not anything he could get himself.
The whimpers come out as he aimlessly begged, “Need you. Mmm…need you so bad.” His grip on his cock tightened as he felt himself get closer, “Need mommy’s pussy. Hah–please.”
He imagined you chucking at him. Condescending telling him that, “Mommy’s right here. You have mommy’s pussy.” You’d grip his cheek between your fingers, “Don’t tell me you need more?” And you’d pout out your bottom lip as his eyes welled up with tears, “Baby boy can’t get off by himself, can he? Needs some help?” And he’d nod desperately. He’d have no resolve, no dignity left. Just an empty head filled with the desire to cum.
The more he thought about your dirty words the closer he got. So so so close. “Please please please,” he whined, “Mommy please let me cum. ‘M your good boy. Please–’m a good boy.”
And just the thought of you telling him, “Go ahead baby. Cum for mommy,” made him cum. A lot. All into your panties and over your sheets and he shook under your blankets. Sobbing into your pillows.
When he collapsed fully into your pillows, he had to take a few minutes to catch his breath. Trying to realize what had just happened. He pulled your blanket up to his neck snuggling further into your bed.
His phone buzzed next to him. And he groaned as he stretched over to grab it. Only to see a text from you.
angel : what happened to being my good boy soobin?
angel : i can’t leave you at home for a few hours without you breaking the rules, can i?
What the fuck? He clicked out of the chat quickly to check his call log. And there it was.
You’d been on the phone the whole time.
general taglist: @swimmingkpopblog @oddracha @drinkingrumandcocacola @minaateez @funnyvxlentine
txt taglist: @shinyj3lly
#soobin smut#choi soobin smut#soobin x reader#choi soobin x reader#soobin x reader smut#choi soobin x reader smut#txt smut#txt x reader#tomorrow x together x reader#txt x reader smut#tomorrow x together smut#tomorrow x together x reader smut#*ੈ✩‧₊˚ dj's work#*ੈ✩‧₊˚ soobin#*ੈ✩‧₊˚ smut
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Lath’halani - Lucanis X Rook Fanfic
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Lucanis knelt, examining the small flowers scattered across the ground. Their vibrant pink petals caught his eye, delicate and striking.
“Whatcha found?” Bellara asked, her curiosity piqued.
“These flowers, they’re beautiful.” Lucanis’s gloved fingers brushed the petals with care.
Bellara leaned over his shoulder, her eyes lighting up. “Oh! I know what they are. In Dalish they are called "Lath’halani", it loosely translates into "Love's Healing". The story goes, if you give them to someone special, they’ll always take care of your heart, and you.”
“A flower can do all that?”
“Well, not literally,” Bellara admitted. “It’s just a myth—but a romantic one! And sometimes, we all need a little more tenderness in our lives, right?”
Lucanis stood, levelling her with a look. “I’m a Crow, Bellara. What part of my work screams ‘romantic’ to you?”
She grinned impishly. “Which is exactly why you should pick some and give them to—” She stopped abruptly, her mouth snapping shut.
“Give them to who?” He frowned, waiting.
“Well,” she began, shifting awkwardly, “Look, you didn’t hear this from me because I don’t like to gossip—”
“Could have fooled me,” he interrupted dryly. “Go on.”
Bellara forged ahead, unbothered. “But I’ve noticed... something between you and Rook. The way you two sneak glances at each other—honestly, it’s adorable. Like one of those stories where they don’t kiss until chapter thirty, but the tension is delicious. She’ll probably tell you, one star-filled night in Treviso, that you’re the only person who’s ever made her feel safe. And, in the end, you’ll save each other. Classic.”
“You got all that just from me looking at someone and smiling?” Lucanis muttered.
“Uh-huh.” Bellara’s energy remained as bouncy as ever. “I swear, I’m writing this down later. The Assassin’s Promise—a tale of love, danger, and—”
“Bellara,” he cut her off, his tone sharp. “If you write anything about me, I’ll swap your sugar for salt the next time I cook.”
“Fine, fine,” she relented, though her grin said otherwise. “All I’m saying is maybe you should pick some flowers for Rook. Take them back to the Lighthouse. I think she’d love them.”
Lucanis regarded her for a long moment, then knelt again, plucking a few blooms. He wrapped them carefully in his handkerchief and tucked them into the small pouch he usually reserved for poisons.
“I knew it!” Bellara squeaked, clapping her hands.
Lucanis shot her a look and sighed, “What exactly did you know?” His tone was flat, but a flicker of curiosity lingered.
“That underneath all the grumpiness and doom, you’re just a big softie. A romantic at heart!”
Lucanis rolled his eyes so hard that Bellara feared they might stick.
“I assure you, Bellara, whatever you think you know, you don’t.”
“Mm-hmm. That’s exactly what someone in denial would say.” She clasped her hands behind her back and practically skipped alongside him as they headed back to the Eluvian. “You’re going to give those flowers to Rook, aren’t you? You should. She’d love them. She’d look at you with those big, doe eyes and probably blush to her ears. So sweet.”
“Bellara…” His tone carried a warning, though it lacked bite.
“But I digress,” she continued breezily. “If you’d rather be the brooding type who stares longingly across the room and never acts on his feelings, that’s fine too. Classic slow-burn. Delicious tension. So much angst.”
Lucanis stopped abruptly, fixing her with a flat stare. “Do you ever stop talking?”
“Not when it’s this much fun.” Her grin was unapologetic.
For a moment, Lucanis debated whether or not to toss her into the nearest river. Ultimately, he decided against it, if only because she’d probably swim back with more commentary. Instead, he shook his head, whispered something in Antivan to himself, and resumed walking.
Bellara trailed behind him at a respectable distance—or perhaps a strategic one—but she couldn’t resist one last parting shot. “Just think about it, Lucanis. You, Rook, flowers, romance… a story for the ages!”
Lucanis didn’t dignify her with a response, though his fingers brushed the pouch at his side, the faintest hint of a smile tugging at his lips.
#lucanis dellamorte#lucanis x rook#rook#rookanis#rookanisfanfic#dragon age the veilguard#bellara lutare#fluffy nonsense#rookderiva#dragon age
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Love in Verses (XXX)
Chapter 30: ‘You liked me well enough in black; I make you a gift of these objects’
Hi! Here is a new chapter! Some shopping for our lovebirds that turns into Andrew fighting for his life…
I hope you like this chapter! Tell me what you think!
****
Pairing: Hozier x fem!reader (professor!AU)
Warnings: slow burn, angst, hurt, hurt/comfort, tooth-rotting fluff in later chapters, some scenes in later chapters will have heavy sexual themes even if it’s not explicit nsfw description, so minors here
Summary: Your life seems perfect. You're engaged, your career is thriving as you become an assistant professor at Trinity College, and this Andrew Hozier-Byrne you're sharing an office with seems to be a nice guy you hope to call a friend soon. Life seems to be smiling at you... until everything goes sour. When your fiancé breaks up with you, your perfect world shatters. And when your colleague also gets his heart broken soon after, your shared office seems to be a curse rather than a blessing. But Andrew seems determined to mend your broken hearts... Will things finally go according to plan?
Word Count: 3322
Masterlist for the series – Hozier’s masterlist – Main masterlist
Here are my black clothes
I think now it is better to love no one than to love you. Here are my black clothes, the tired nightgowns and robes fraying in many places. Why should they hand useless as though I were going naked? You liked me well enough in black; I make you a gift of these objects. You will want to touch them with your mouth, run your fingers through the thin tender underthings and I will not need them in my new life.
Louise Glück, The First Five Book of Poems
The tailor was posh but undoubtedly talented. Then again, it was a tailor, posh was to be expected.
It was the old type of tailor, the one you saw in movies, the type that hid a secret passage to the secret service. Wooden walls covered with wooden shelves and clothes, wooden tiles on the floor, large corduroy armchairs. You walked in feeling like you didn’t belong there, like you should never have come in the first place.
Frank spotted you instantly when you walked in. You hadn’t seen each other in a few weeks, there were times when you missed him. There were times when you didn’t think of him at all… what a strange feeling… he was always in your thoughts for years…
You wished Andrew was there with you. You wondered if his classes were going well this morning, you wanted to make him a coffee and chat instead of working…
“Y/N!” Frank beamed at you, crossing the room to give you a hug. “I’ve missed you! We’ve spent too long apart!”
“Missed you too. You look well! Are you ready to choose your suit?”
“I’m so nervous,” he admitted with an uncomfortable laugh.
“It’ll be just fine.”
You said hello to Frank’s friends and family members gathered in the shop. Only a few people, including the three best men.
The tailor came in a few minutes later, started taking care of his clients. You remained quiet while the group was splitting its attention between Frank’s suit and his best men’ clothes.
The plan was simple. You had to give him terrible advice. You had to ruin the suit, make him look ridiculous. Something that Sam would hate.
That was the only way to weaken the wedding with today’s activity.
You waited patiently, watched Frank try suits on. Every piece of garment shattered your heart.
You should have been the one discovering the suit on your wedding day. You should have been the one he talked about now, asking if you would like that colour on him, hoping you would find him handsome.
He was. He was handsome. So fucking much. You wanted to shout, to claw your eyes out of their sockets with the pain of it. He was so handsome, and you should have never been here. Instead of seeing him try on all these suits, you should have been the bride hiding her dress from him. But you weren’t. You were just the friend he was turning his attention to now, asking for an advice.
And you couldn’t do it. Couldn’t ruin this for him. You were too kind-hearted for that, or perhaps, you were simply too much in pain.
You struggled to put a smile on your face.
“I think navy blue is better than green on you.”
“You think?” he asked, looking at the two shades.
“It matches your eyes better. Makes them pop.”
He smiled, bright and excited.
Had he ever smiled like this thinking of your wedding? Of marrying you?
“Thank you, Y/N. You’re always right with those things.”
“Because I pay attention.”
Your answer held more meaning than it seemed, but he didn’t notice. He never did. Not when it was you.
And you wanted revenge now. You wanted him to regret you. You wanted him to see that you were enough, that you were always enough, that Sam wasn’t better than you… even if you didn’t really believe it. Frank had chosen Sam. Andrew had been in love with her, and now that he was starting to move on, it was to be with a woman who wasn’t you.
You excused yourself, looked for the bathroom. The moment you turned the lock on your door, the tears were let free.
You looked so sad when you came back.
It was almost noon when you stepped in the office, Andrew had been waiting for you to eat his lunch. He didn’t have classes for the rest of the day, and neither did you. He was relieved about it, you clearly needed some help.
“How did it go?” he asked as you closed the door behind you.
You didn’t answer at first, instead you took the time to take off your coat, let yourself fall in your office chair and throw your head back towards the ceiling. You let out a dramatic moan, Andrew chuckled at the sound.
“That bad, huh? Did you make him choose something terrible to wear?”
You didn’t answer.
“Let me guess… you saw him in there, it broke your heart, but you didn’t lie and helped him look stunning for his wedding day.”
“How do you know? That’s exactly what happened.”
“I know you. You’re too kind to do something so mean and selfish. Hiding a few bottles of champagne is one thing, making your ex look like a fool on the most important day of his life is another.”
“I’m so pathetic. I feel so… pathetic…”
“You’re not. You’re just heartbroken.”
“Same bloody thing.”
“What can I do?”
You looked at him then, tears in your eyes and looking so sad… so damn sad…
But then you looked angry instead, wrath burning through your gaze and Andrew shuddered at the sight.
You looked gorgeous like this, despite your eyes reddened with tears. Fierce was a good look on you, it had always been…
“I’m going to make him regret me so fucking much he’ll beg to get me back.”
He raised an eyebrow, surprised by your determination.
“And how do we do that?”
“By making me look so fucking good he’ll have nightmares about leaving me.”
Andrew’s heart skipped a beat. His words came out in a whisper you didn’t hear.
“You’re always gorgeous, Y/N…”
“We’re going to this party they’re throwing two weeks before the wedding. So… in…”
“Two weeks.”
“Yeah… in two weeks. God, I can’t believe it’s the end of April already. Exams will be back in no time.”
“Don’t mention that…” Andrew winced. “Besides, we’ll have to go through the conference first…”
“Did you have an answer for that by the way?”
Andrew smiled.
“Main speaker on the second day. Forty-minutes presentation.”
“That’s awesome, Andy! Congrats!”
“I’m going to hate every second of it.”
“You’ll be brilliant.”
“We’ll need to rehearse your presentation too.”
“Yes, thank you for helping me.”
“Don’t mention it. We’re a team.”
You exchanged a tender smile, one that reached gratefulness for more than professional support.
“Anyway, I’m going to go shopping after work,” you declared. “I’ll buy the most gorgeous dress for that party. And Frank will be at my fucking feet.”
Andrew chuckled at that.
“Alright, good plan.”
“Actually… can I be insufferable and ask for your help?”
“Pardon me? My help? I don’t know anything about dresses…”
“You’re a man. You know what men like. Actually, you know what? We could go now. Be back before two and work this afternoon.”
“Now?”
“Now.”
“Okay…”
Andrew gathered his things in a hurry, let you babble away while you exited the office. He didn’t mention the way your voice was shaking from time to time, how your eyes still glistened with withheld tears.
He didn’t mention any of it. He merely drove you to the shop you liked.
Andrew didn’t know what to do while you browsed through expensive dresses, selected a few, asked for his opinion. He didn’t really have any. He had no idea what he was supposed to do to make you smile again, to make you happy, to make you feel as beautiful as you truly were…
You walked in a fitting room with five different dresses to try on. There weren’t many people in the shop at this hour, only an old woman with her grand-daughter were looking for a dress for the young woman. The elder lady started chatting casually with Andrew while they both waited in front of the cabins.
“Your girlfriend is looking for a dress for a special occasion?” she asked, and Andrew fiercely blushed.
“Oh… no, she’s not… we’re not… She’s not my girlfriend.”
She gave him a look, one that annoyed him a lot.
“Right… I see…”
Andrew ignored her, her grand-daughter showing her a dress the perfect excuse not to answer.
And then he heard you calling his name in a quiet voice…
His heart didn’t just skip a few beats, it stopped altogether. Butterflies didn’t cut it, these were fireworks in his stomach.
You were standing there in an emerald dress that fell across your calves, a low cut on your cleavage that made his wildest fantasies about you seem mild.
“What do you think? I like this one.”
You turned around to show him the back, or rather, the absence of clothing on the backless dress.
Andrew couldn’t breathe. Couldn’t think…
You were so… so…
“How do I look?”
You were so… so…
“…Breathtaking.”
You blinked up at him. And he tried to hide his reaction, but he couldn’t. He must have looked stunned, a deer in headlights, and he couldn’t help it. You were so…
“…Perfect.”
You raised a surprised eyebrow, a shy smile forming on your lips.
He wanted to kiss you so badly. He wanted to touch the skin of your back the dress revealed. He wanted to run his fingers along your cleavage. He wanted to tear that gorgeous dress off you…
He cleared his throat, averted his eyes so he would stop staring at you.
“Yeah… that’s… a good one.”
“I have another I like, hang on.”
He nodded, unable to look at you. He could feel warmth spreading through his body, but he would never survive the humiliation of getting a boner in the middle of a shop because you were trying dresses on…
“Not your girlfriend, huh?”
Andrew turned to the stranger, the old woman giving him a knowing smile.
“You’d better make her your girlfriend, before it’s too late.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“No, of course not.”
She heaved a sigh, looking at the closed curtain of the fitting room where her grand-daughter had disappeared.
“My husband looked at me like that, you know? The way you look at her. And I can only hope my grand-child will find someone who will look at her like that, too.”
“Like what?”
“Like she is the most beautiful thing on this earth.”
She stared right into his eyes.
“The way you must be looked at when you are loved.”
Andrew struggled to swallow, looked away, fiercely blushing.
Christ, he was a desperate case. And if a stranger could notice his feelings for you, surely everyone had… what would you say if you noticed? Would you push him away? Would you break his heart?
You walked out of your cabin again, wearing a black dress this time. And Andrew tried to hide it better this time, but you looked divine. It fitted your curves perfectly, it made your body look like sin…
“What about this one?” you asked, turning around, and Andrew hated himself for being unable to stop himself from staring at your arse.
“Yeah… that’s a good one too,” he nodded, clearing his throat.
“Which one do you prefer?”
“I… I don’t know…”
“Come on! I like both. I don’t know which one to pick. What’s your favourite?”
He struggled to control his breathing, to slow down his heart.
“I… erm… I really liked the green one.”
“The green one?”
“Yeah, it… you’re gorgeous in this dress too though.”
He heard you clearing your throat too.
“Right… the green dress it is, then.”
“Yeah… okay… grand… erm, like… good…”
“Thanks, Andy.”
“Don’t mention it.”
Christ, please, don’t mention it…
“I’ll get changed real quick.”
He hummed as he nodded, still unable to look at you.
By his side, the elderly lady chuckled, and Andrew wanted to dissolve into nothing, a puddle on the ground, to simply be atomised into thin air…
You bought the dress, Andrew drove you back to Trinity in relative silence. He was too busy picturing you in these dresses again, too busy trying not to picture you in these dresses again.
When you walked back to your office though, it was obvious that you were still sad. That search for a semblance of power over a situation you couldn’t control was gone again. He let out a long exhale through his nose as he looked at you sitting behind your desk. He crossed the room, avoiding the lamp hanging from the ceiling, and gave you a soft smile.
“You’re alright, Y/N?”
You shook your head.
“I’m sorry… I just… I can’t get over it.”
“It’s okay. You’re upset, that’s all.”
“Seeing him like this… wearing these suits… he should have been wearing them for me…”
“I know. I know, Y/N.”
“I want my life back.”
“But you have one. You have one now. You don’t need him in it.”
“I feel like I need him. I feel like I… like I just messed everything up.”
“You didn’t. You didn’t mess anything up. None of this is your fault.”
“If he chose her, then I must be lacking something…”
“You’re not. Trust me, you’re not lacking anything. It’s his loss if he can’t see what’s right in front of him.”
You looked up at him, surprised by the sudden harshness of his tone.
“You don’t need him, Y/N… you… you could have better than him. You… he’s not… He’s not even paying attention to you.”
“What do you mean?”
“He doesn’t really care. I think he’s a little too selfish for that.”
He shook his head.
“I see you with him, you know? You’re not yourself. You’re not… babbling away about cinema, or literature, or art or this recipe you’ve just tried or… it’s like you just shut down. And you listen, and then you make a tiny summary of all the things you wanted to say… but you’re so fucking smart. You’re so fucking interesting. You’re… you shouldn’t be with someone who doesn’t care about what you have to say. And he fucking broke your heart! Why do you still want him? Why…?”
Why do you still want him, instead of me?
But he didn’t say it. He stopped, and closed his fists tightly.
Andrew was growing annoyed, angry even. And of course you noticed, he reckoned he was doing a pretty bad job at hiding his true feelings.
“Y/N… Frank… I’m not saying he’s a bad person, but…”
“But?”
“But he doesn’t deserve you.”
You raised an eyebrow, visibly unimpressed.
“Really? Why not? It’s not like I’m anything special, anyway.”
Andrew frowned hard.
“Are you listening to yourself?!” he asked with something aghast in his voice, a genuine incomprehension that surprised you. “You’re… you’re amazing. You deserve so much better than him! You deserve to be treated with respect, to have someone who actually pays attention to you, who cares about you, who listens to you when you’re talking about your passions, who’s not going to disregard what you’re saying simply because they disagree…”
But you interrupted him with a scoff.
“Perfection doesn’t exist, Andy. I’ve learned as much in life. I don’t have a choice but to settle for less than that.”
“There’s a difference between accepting someone’s faults and flaws and setting the bar so low it’s actually buried underground…”
“You’re one to talk! You’re still in love with Samantha despite how she hurt you, despite the fact that she doesn’t give two shites about your poetry or your work, about the fact that she won’t make a single fucking effort for you…”
“Who says I’m still in love with her?”
You raised a surprised eyebrow, and you were genuinely taken aback this time, Andrew could tell.
“You’re not?” you asked, your tone quieter, Andrew guessed that it was a side-effect of your surprise.
“No, I’m not. I’ve learnt my lesson. I want to move on. I… I’m moving on.”
“Wow… that’s… good… That’s really grand, Andy. Is it… because of that woman you mentioned?”
Andrew’s heart sped up, he could feel himself panicking, he closed and opened his fists multiple times in an attempt to slow down his breathing.
“I… I mean… kind of…”
“Kind of?”
“I…”
He took a deep breath, gathering his courage.
“I want to be with her. I… I just… I haven’t told her yet.”
“Why not? You should ask her on a date.”
But he shook his head.
“She won’t say yes. I know her, she won’t go on a date with me, not for now. Besides… It’s too soon… for me too, I mean. I need to put Sam behind me for good, before I can try to be with her.”
You stared at him with a blank expression… or rather, not blank. The opposite. Like you felt something but tried to show the opposite reaction. The result was unreadable to him.
“I’m glad you’re moving on.”
But your tone was flat, and you didn’t seem happy at all.
“Thanks,” Andrew answered anyway.
You heaved a tired sigh.
“Please, don’t judge me with Frank. I… you don’t understand.”
Andrew sighed too, let the air out through gritted teeth.
“No, you’re right. I don’t understand. I mean… I do. I do understand the process of grieving for a life that wasn’t fully yours to begin with, but you thought would belong to you. But that’s the thing, Y/N. You need to start grieving now. You can’t remain stuck there forever. You… You deserve to be happy. You deserve better than that. Don’t do that to yourself. Especially not for someone like him. We deserve better than this, Y/N.”
You stared at him now, tears in your eyes, a sight he wished he could banish forever. He would take all of your pain away if he could, he would suffer it in your stead.
“It’s not that easy, Andy,” you shook your head, taking a step back.
“It could be. It could be, Y/N…”
“I’ve loved him for so long…”
Andrew slowly nodded.
“You could love again, with a little bit of time. He… he doesn’t care about you, Y/N. He doesn’t… listen when you talk. He acts like he does, but he doesn’t. He’s not interested in what makes you happy…”
“Neither is Sam with you.”
“I know. I know, and I don’t want that anymore.”
“But I want Frank.”
Your voice was shaking, it didn’t sound either earnest nor convincing. Still, hearing the words broke Andrew’s heart.
After everything… how could you still want Frank… why couldn’t you want him instead?
Could you… could you ever want him?
Andrew closed his fists tightly, until he could feel the sharp pain of his nails digging crescent marks into his palm. Perhaps you would never want him. Maybe it wasn’t just about Frank, maybe it was about him… maybe he was simply… not your type, not attractive to you, not good enough.
He let out a long, painful exhale through his nose.
“Would that make you happy?” he genuinely asked, voice quiet, deeper than usual, but softer than before as well. “Is that what will make you happy?”
You stared at him for a moment, then clenched your jaw. When you answered, he couldn’t read in your eyes whether or not you were telling the truth. Maybe you were lying… against all odds, he hoped you were lying.
“Yes.”
One word, breathed out, it was enough to break his heart.
Slowly, Andrew nodded.
“Alright, we’ll do it then. We’ll go to that stupid party. We’ll make him jealous. We’ll make him see what he’s losing by choosing Sam over you. If it’s what it takes for you to be happy… As long as it makes you happy.”
“Thank you.”
He stared at you as you walked back to your desk, sat before your computer, looked at the screen.
He turned around, blinking tears away, stood in front of the window behind his desk.
As long as it would make you happy…
#hozier#andrew hozier byrne#the hoziest#hozier x reader#hozier x y/n#hozier x you#hozier x fem!reader#hozier fanfiction#hozier fic#hozier series#hozier au#hozier professor au#professor au#series#fanfiction#fanfic#writing
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I'll just address you directly here - because I think maybe you think you are doing the right thing. Let's talk about what you've said and why it isn't very productive, reflects bias, and promotes the continuation of conflict.
First, you have reified the character of certain nations. This is really a dangerous thing to do - in no small part because it is foundational to ideologies which are hyper nationalist, and because it assigns qualities to something which fundamentally cannot possess qualities, because nations don't exist as actual things in the world. You say people should hate (interesting word choice here) on Israel - but what even is Israel conceptually? It's irrational to hate in general, but especially irrational to hate a nation. What we can, and should oppose, is certain kinds of actions taken by governments and their leaders. Governments can change, actions can change, your opposition to these things is far more meaningful than your opposition to a nation itself.
Second, you have applied an inconsistent standard about whether or not your disdain for these nations, based on traits you have assigned them in your reification process, can be applied to people in that nation. You acknowledge that Israelis are not Israel itself (which you already said you hate). Later, in your response to this person, you bring up his nationality against him. Using somebody's nationality in this way is prejudiced, and promotes the kind of thinking that furthers violence - even if you yourself did not say anything violent.
Third, you are basing your opposition to Israel itself on the idea that has broken international law. I agree - there have been violations of international law in this conflict, but part of what makes conflicts like these so disgusting is that these violations happen pretty uniformly among participants. I don't think that you would say that violations committed by Palestinian actors contribute to the character of Palestine. Why, then, do you suggest Netanyahu's actions, as well as wider aspects of the Israeli government, contribute to the character of Israel as a nation?
Fourth, this kind of rhetoric does not solve the problem, it makes it worse. If you are speaking from a place of hatred, you cannot achieve peace. Peace through violence, in word or deed, is not a real or acceptable form of peace.
You and I probably agree on a lot - the point of this post though is the danger of alienating Israeli people from the peace process. This alienation deepens the conflict and it's harms, so it's important that we at least try to use rhetoric that does not do this.
One difficult thing about having conversations with the Hamas stans is that they work so hard to actively alienate, denigrate, and demean Israeli people (through their antisemitism), who are in the position to most meaningfully impact the situation. Like... the peace activism done by unapologetically pro-Jewish activists in Israel, who want the release of hostages, and a ceasefire, is genuinely inspiring.
This is the demographic who may be most capable of changing the situation for the better. We want peace, we need it. They want it too.
Picking sides, cheering on your team, isn't how we get it.
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Hello! I don't know if you're still taking requests, but if you do, could I please request an imagine where the reader and eddie are best friends and the reader gets really injured when Venom is in a fight, bonus points if eddie has to do cpr to revive her. Thank you so so much!
~Hazard of Our Friendship~
Pairing: Eddie Brock x Reader
Word Count: 2k
Warnings: drowning mention, knives, graphic depictions of violence
Genre: fluffy angst
Summary: Your best friend has a symbiotic alien sharing his body which means sometimes he gets attacked while you're just trying to discuss a movie.
A/N: Oh darling my asks are always open~! xo hope you like it!
***
You scoff as you listen to Eddie talk. You can't believe what he's saying.
"You're crazy! You seriously think that was better than the second one?" You ask incredulously.
"I think each movie gets better than the last." Eddie says.
"What're you smoking and how do I get some because you are clearly on something." You snort.
"I liked it I don't see the problem." He shrugs.
"That's not the question though! I liked it too but it's NOT better than the second one was!" You shake your head.
"You do this every time we see one of these movies." Eddie chuckles.
"Because the second was the best! It's in a league of its own they're never gonna do better than that." You say.
"Okay fine ye of little faith and quick judgment- what could they do to make the next movie better than the second movie?" Eddie rolls his eyes playfully.
"The second movie was just iconic! When they realize and manage to replicate the intensity with which that movie hit emotionally, they'll have another masterpiece. It's not about duplicating though, they shouldn't repeat the plot, they just need to figure out how to create a similar pull. That's what I'm looking for I need a pull and the newer movies just haven't been pulling me."
"You're insane you know that?"
"I think you need to rewatch the second movie. Clearly you aren't properly remembering the absolute magic of the second movie dude." You shake your head.
"Clearly." He snorts. A moment passes and notice something change abruptly in your friend's demeanor.
"What?" You frown at him.
"What?" He snaps his head towards you.
"Your energy shifted, something changed. Why? What's going on?"
"Nothing." He says quickly.
"You're on edge. I can see it so don't lie to me. Especially because you're starting to stress me out." You tell him.
"Venom's a little- freaked. He thinks we've got company." Eddie admits.
"Not the good kind I'm guessing. Based on your... disposition."
"Just- stay close, it'll be fine." Eddie says gently resting his hand on your arm. He's clearly on high alert, eyes scanning every darkened alley you walk by. You catch movement off to one side and grab Eddie's attention.
"E- could those be our visitors?" You ask. Eddie follows your eye.
"Fuck me- it's fine, just stay behind me." Eddie steps forward and uses his arm to nudge you behind him.
"Come on Eddie, they're just some guys. This should be easy." You say.
"Unfortunately if they've come for me it's never just some guys." Eddie sighs. "Look guys- I'm sure you don't want any trouble, whatever you think you're gonna gain from this, you'll lose a lot more- trust me." Eddie tells the group. There's maybe 5 of them it seems, but you can't be sure others aren't lurking nearby.
"Yeah- that's the bastard." One of the guys grumbles and Eddie's eyebrow furrows.
"Wait sorry- do you know me or something?" Eddie asks, tilting his head.
"You fucking jackass-" The guy is clearly appalled by Eddie's perceived audacity and starts towards you and Eddie.
"Venom." Eddie calls.
"COPY." Venom replies before overtaking Eddie. You step back a bit to accommodate the size change. Also to give him room, Venom's fighting style is- messy from what you know.
You've never actually seen them fight, although Eddie didn't try to hide Venom from you, he was very intentional about limiting your exposure to him. You're not totally sure why, but it doesn't stop you from making nice with him. Eddie swears the relationship between them is mostly symbiotically beneficial, which means he'll probably be around for a while. Which means he'll be around you for a while, and you want that to be a net positive. So you always ask about him and include him in your relationship with Eddie, and bring him chocolate any time you hang out with them. Eddie swears you spoil him so you hope that means he likes you.
Venom seems to be handling the fight pretty well, I mean he can grow appendages at will, no matter how many of them there are, they can't outmatch him.
"You're coming with me." A gruff voice says wrapping a hand around your wrist.
You snap your head around quickly.
"Fuck off. Don't touch me." You take your index and middle finger and jam them into the inner corners of his eyes.
He screams as you dig your digits in deeper.
"You're ruining movie night." You drag him forward by his eye sockets and bash his head into your knee knocking him out. "Asshole." You huff.
"Eulgch gross now my hand is covered in eye juice." You frown. You bend over and wipe your hand on his shirt.
"That's better I guess." You say stepping over the guy to wear Venom has dragged the fight, near the pier.
"Not so fast." A voice grits out behind you as arms encircle your body, trapping you.
"Hey let go of me you bastard." You grunt squirming against his hold.
Your movements stop abruptly with a sharp gasp when you feel cool metal against your throat. A knife.
"Really? An 8 foot monster is stomping out your little pals and you go for the one who isn't doing shit? Coward." You scoff.
"Shut up." He spits through clenched teeth.
"Eddie!" You call out. "No rush but when you get a second some help would be nice! VENOM!" You shout, the blade digging ever so slightly into your skin.
Venom snaps his head towards you and immediately changes his focus, heading towards you and the person holding you hostage.
Your captor walks you backwards as Venom closes in but as he reaches an appendage towards you one of the others pulls out a flamethrower. Where did he get a fucking flamethrower?!
"Venom look out!" You shout but you're not quick enough.
The fire hits him. He lets out a roar of a sound. And then retreats into Eddie, who falls to his knees.
"Eddie?!" You call frantically.
"I'm fine! Just- gotta give Venom time to recover." Eddie grunts.
"If you're fine get up and turn around you dumbass!" You shout. The guy with the flamethrower is closing in on Eddie, luckily he's dropped the thing. Not really a smart move in your opinion but it makes Eddie's chances of beating him without Venom higher.
Eddie spins on his heel just in time to dodge a wild swing from mister flamethrower.
"Woah. Shit." Eddie says. He punches the guy directly in the face and the two start a proper fist fight.
"Hang on y/n I'll be right there!" He tells you between throwing and dodging punches.
"Yeah, I wasn't planning on going anywhere!" You say.
"Could do without the sass at this moment dude!" He says.
"I've got a knife to my throat I'll do whatever I want to cope with it!" You shoot back.
"Sorry about all this!"
"Hazard of our friendship! I know how this goes!" You say.
Eddie finally takes down his opponent and turns to you. He runs in your direction, Venom at some point taking over and freaking out your captor. For a guy holding a knife to your throat he's moving incredibly reckless, stumbling backwards and dragging you with him. Right over the edge of the pier. You scream as you fall back, at least you've been released it seems. Your assailant, in trying to save himself has freed you from his grasp.
The water is a bit chilly, it's not as bad as it could be, but it is only August so it'd be weird if it was ice cold. Water fills your mouth as you sink below the surface. You try to swim up, but the other guy wraps his hand around your leg. You can't swim super well as is, the extra weight hindering your movement pretty much renders your attempt to save yourself futile. Still you flail and desperately kick at your attacker's hand, hoping that you can get him to let you go before your lungs give out. They're already starting to seriously burn.
You hate open water. Besides the fact that you're nowhere near a strong enough swimmer based on the dangers of open water like this, you can't see anything and not knowing what lurks nearby stresses you out even more.
You're starting to panic. The longer you're down here, the more undersea monsters you seem to be able to imagine. You're going to die down here and some random swimming creatures will start eating your decaying flesh and your family won't even have a body to bury when they have your funeral. Or if they manage to find you, you'll be so destroyed by critters they'll have to keep the casket closed. Honestly at this point you hope they cremate you.
The panicking isn't helping. You know it's not, and yet it's all you can do as your vision is starting to blacken around the edges. You still can't get this guy to let go of your fucking leg, and dammit you're getting too weak to keep fighting him. How is he still holding on? You feel your body go limp as you lose consciousness.
Eddie's heart drops as he watches you go over the edge of the pier. You can barely swim, you hate the open water, he has to get you out of there and fast. The only problem is it feels like these goons keep multiplying and if they have to keep fighting he'll never reach you in time.
"We have to get to y/n." Eddie says.
"WE WILL." Venom says ready to fight the next guy.
"No, now V! Fuck the fighting I don't care eat them if you have to. Just get to her!"
"GREAT PLAN." Venom's smile is enough to freak out the person standing between them and where you're currently drowning.
Eddie's counting the seconds as Venom traipses towards the water, biting off heads on the way. There's not even enough movement near the surface for Eddie to tell if you're still alive down there. It's taking you two long to come up.
"YOUR STRESS IS MAKING THIS MORE DIFFICULT EDDIE."
"I'll stop stressing when we get y/n out of the fucking water!" Eddie snaps.
"FINE!" Venom dives into the water and manages to find you surprisingly quickly, dragging your lifeless body out of the water.
"Put her down we have to do something." Eddie says.
"WHAT DO WE DO?" Venom asks.
"You watch my back while I try to remember my high school CPR class." Eddie tells him, kneeling beside you.
Pressure.
There's a pressure against your chest.
It's rhythmic, consistent, and just a couple of pascals short of risking a broken rib.
Your nose is pinched and something touches your lips. Air flows into your mouth in bursts and then again with the pressure.
Suddenly you feel water coming up and you lurch forward to expell it, coughing painfully as your body tries to get rid of the water forced into your lungs when you nearly drowned.
"God drowning sucks." You choke out, your voice coming out very raspy and it honestly hurts to say even that short sentence.
"Thank fuck." Eddie sighs, his shoulders dropping in relief.
"YOU'RE ALIVE! EDDIE WE SAVED HER." Venom pokes his head around over Eddie's shoulder.
"I thought I was going to lose you." Eddie whispers, cupping your cheek gently.
"I'm almost offended you thought I'd go out that easily." You joke, coughing again.
"Stop talking! You'll hurt yourself." Eddie says.
"Oh would you relax. I'm not dead, talking won't do me in." You roll your eyes.
"YOU SOUND LIKE YOU ARE IN PAIN." Venom says.
"Thanks V." You snort.
"Venom she just almost drowned dude." Eddie shakes his head.
"I AM TRYING TO CHECK ON HER. WHAT IS THE PROBLEM!?"
"Nothing's wrong. Don't you two start. Just- can you take me home?" You groan forcing yourself up. Eddie scrambles to his feet, helping you up until eventually Venom simply takes over and lifts you into his arms.
"Venom I'm pretty sure I can still walk ya know." You say, admittedly a bit nervous in his hold. Not that you think he'll drop you, you've just never interacted with him so directly.
"YOU SHOULDN'T STRAIN YOURSELF. AND WE ARE TAKING YOU TO OUR APARTMENT."
"What? Why?"
"SO WE CAN TAKE CARE OF YOU WHILE YOU GET BETTER."
"Get better? All I need to do is shower and go to sleep, I'll be fine." You scoff.
"EDDIE WANTS TO SEE THAT FOR HIMSELF."
"You're very lucky I don't have any more energy to argue about all this." You mutter.
Eddie counts his blessings when he hears that. Of course it would take you nearly drowning to finally allow him to look after you. Little victories he supposes. Granted saving your life is definitely way more than a little victory. You are the single most important person in his life. If he wasn't sure of that before this he's absolutely sure of it now.
***
#marvel#marvel fanfiction#venom x reader#eddie brock x reader x venom#venom smut#venom fanfiction#venom#eddie brock fanfic#eddie brock x reader#eddie brock#venom fluff
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