#I didn't know about homosexuality
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
I always feel mildly bemused when I read people post about stuff like systemic sexism in fandoms, particularly things like about how people complain more about female characters but ignore male characters with similar faults, or the fandoms loving gay ships but not making as much fanworks for lesbian ones.
Part of this is just because I like female characters (despite being male, I tend to prefer things with female leads etc) and I'm not that involved in a lot of fandom arguments nor do I read a lot of shipfics, so I only hear about a lot of the sexism when people complain about it. Which is kind of funny to me in the fact it must exist, but I'm just conveniently shielded from it.
The other reason is some of my earliest fandoms I got involved in were female-majority casts, so most people do ship the women. Like, I think Equestria Daily once put out an apology after they posted a Braeburn m/m fic (admittedly, the outrage from the bronies back then in 2012 or whenever was probably out of homophobia, which isn't nice either, but the point still stands that they were no issues with w/w shipfics and to this day they are the vast, vast majority of shipping fics (mostly because once you've shipped Braeburn, Sorin' and Big Mac together there aren't that many other guys left to ship, but nonetheless)). Or like Barbie with its vastly superior chemistry between the joint female leads over the threadbare male love interest they've thrown in. Even when the male leads are good, it's popular to ship the girls.
I don't think I have anything substantial to say. I just don't understand the issues other men (or indeed women) have with female characters (and women and femininity in general) (I mean I do understand I just find it bizarre it when like a friend of mine once said he wasn't really interested in stories with female leads. I don't know, maybe read more books with better female protags? I have a bookshelf's worth if you want suggestions) (also like when people suggest there needs to be more talk about good female characters like, most of my favourites are already females and I will gladly talk about them till the cows come home). But also that's just me.
Also I kind of do like m/m ships a fraction more but that's like 90% because I'm bi and so, you know, I like seeing guys together because I kind of would like to get together with a guy if the opportunity arose. But I mean other than that they're just ships. Like sure there can be a different vibe or flavour to w/w or m/m or straight ships, but I mean if they're good characters why should my interest depend on their genders? I read things to experience the lives of others, I don't want to just see stories that match my experience. And sometimes I empathise most with the female characters so like, you need to approach characters with an open mind. I don't know.
OK I'm rambling now. I think I made my point. I'm not sure what it was anymore but I guess it's that women in fiction are cool and I don't know what everyone else's problem is.
#also yeah just because I don't commonly experience this stuff doesn't mean I think it doesn't exist#because I've seen enough arguments about ATLA and TLOK to know people get annoyed with female leads more easily#to say nothing of other reported outrages in fandoms#And for my layton fans I have no issue with Kat as a lead. I think her in the anime is great. I just dislike the game lmj#but back to atla. I enjoy zukoXsokka stuff#pretty much just because it's kind of hot or cute#like I don't seriously ship them#I'm technically a SokkaXSukki shipper#a MaiXZuko shipper and a KataraXAang shipper#because I tend to just accept whatever ship is presented to me as the end result#but also because I was like 7 or 8 at the time#I didn't know about homosexuality#and I hadn't watched the book 2 finale nor book 3 at all#people take shipping to seriously too though like does it matter who you think are cute together?#like I ship Rainbow and AJ in mlp but also AJ and Rarity#and Flutterdash is also cute#like it's not like I believe only one will work#they're made up characters. Their personalities and existence are entirely contingent upon our choices#they don't actually have fixed or true selves#like we can dig into Layton's psyche but in reality we're kind of just making stuff up based on what we believe to be true#Level 5 did not write him to be a traumatised character but they did by accident#like that's fun to explore please keep doing it#but like....... there's not a correct interpretation#no one should insist on that#not even the writer if you believe in 'death of the author'#no wonder people on this site seem to have hated English classes growing up#they didn't learn to have fun debating alternate interpretations of things#anyway read books written by women about women they're great#if you take nothing else away from this rant#it's that
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
I love that even with all the lengths Stronghart went through to hide Kazuma's identity (using a mask to hide his eyes and a cloak to cover everything else, banning him from even speaking), the minute Ryunosuke saw him for the first time he suspected it. From his posture alone, they knew each other for about a year and were separated for like eight months and Ryunosuke could still identify his bbf from the way he stood like... Kazuma lost his memory, his identity, his... everything and Ryunosuke still clocked it, even though he literally thinks Kazuma is dead, that the prosecutor's masked apprentice is the whole reason he's even there at all.
Literally what else could Stronghart have done to hide Kazuma's presence from Ryunosuke, he did as much as he could but still Ryunosuke felt it immediately. This feels gayer than most of the yaoi I've come across, this is a major plot point in a romantic drama, this can't not be a trope in one of the kdramas my dad likes to watch on Netflix.
#I feel like if Ryunosuke was like 10% less busy he would've figured it out completely#he just has things to deal with...#also i love how he really wants to be a lawyer now when at the start of the series he was Not Into It#he did it for kazumas dream and bc he didn't want to let susato down and ruin the trip for her#but now hes fully intending on getting his own lawyer certifications and planning to wear both his own and Kazumas armbands#he started out so aimless but now he's found the thing he wants to be and its so nice#anyway barok has homosexual feelings for that mad scientist guy and I know we're supposed to feel bad for him bc his brother was 'killed'#but i dont really feel it yet#he needs to be nicer to me#i do love how worried Ryunosuke was for him after the attack that was kinda cute#they have the opposite views being 'just bc you're an asshole doesn't mean I think you should die' and 'i wont mourn the wicked'#also Ryunosuke being so convinced about the reapers curse is fascinating to me... it gives me ideas for my phoenix!Naruhodos au#andromeda plays tgaa#andromeda plays#asoryuu
86 notes
·
View notes
Text
"queer women", "[celebrity name] identifies as queer", "queers in media", "queers in sport", "queer actress"
#i saw article called 'Kaitlyn Weaver' comes out' and she calls herself 'queer woman'#queer queer queer queer queer shut the fuck up there are words that aren't slurs use them#lesbian is not a scary word#gay is not a scary word#bi is not a scary word#queer doesn't explain much#how do i know that you're actually homosexual and not just annoying heterosexual trying to be cool freaky mushroom#i didn't even know about that word before i started interacting more with english media#radblr
218 notes
·
View notes
Text
gang i have to share this P. G. Wodehouse quote with you all because ever since I found it I can't stop thinking about it. it's from a letter he wrote when he was 78 years old to his friend Guy Bolton (many thanks to P. G. Wodehouse: A Life in Letters)
I have been on the sick list myself, but am better now. Inflamed bladder or chill on the bladder or something, the symptoms being agony when I passed water, as the expression is. It brought back the brave old days when I used to get clap.
he really said "yeah the pain from my bladder issue reminds of the days when I used to have so much sex I repeatedly got venereal disease"
#red randomness#p. g. wodehouse#he was so known for not having sex with his beloved wife#that i truly didn't expect this at all#i feel like i see a lot of people saying with a great deal of confidence that he was sex-repulsed ace#especially due to the wife thing#but while he certainly may have been ace on some level#i feel like at the very least this casts some doubt on the sex-repulsed part lmao#i suppose it's possible he was lying but wouldn't this be such a specific and unnecessary lie in this context?#especially for a private letter to a friend he'd known and worked with for decades#because he really didn't even need to bring it up#of course i am open to evidence to the contrary#i just dislike seeing overconfident opinions broadly prevail#even when aspects of a real person's life suggest the possibility of otherwise#the study of history is meant to breed discussion!#and something that goes against the grain of past assumption is certainly worth discussing imo#also very grateful to the unpublished monograph by George Simmers about Honeysuckle Cottage#because that's how i found out about this letter in the first place!#great monograph mr. simmers please publish it someday#opened my third eye about the potential latent homosexuality in that story (among other things)#and at risk of having someone get mad at me or say i'm trying to like. diminish or slander the ace community by saying this#please don't assume that. that's why i've been afraid to share this before.#i'm not confidently stating wodehouse is anything. he's a real man who lived and i didn't know him#but by the same token neither does anyone else#i'm just as tired of people in history who have a fair amount of suggestion of being aroace being broadly assumed gay#despite evidence to the contrary#or people confidently assigning queerness to historical figures when evidence of them being queer in any way is ambiguous at best#everything in history is a maybe. we just collect facts and analyze them.#and my current analysis based on this line is that i'm not sure i think he was very sex-repulsed after all#(but like. i'm not going around insulting or fighting people about it in dms or something. and neither should you)
11 notes
·
View notes
Text
Today I learned that "Makoharu" can either be:
• A persona 5 ship entailing Makoto Niijima and Haru Okumura.
Or
• A free! ship entailing Makoto Tachibana and Haruka Nanase.
And I think that's beautiful. Truly, the ultimate ship.
#Makoharu#wlw mlm solidarity#a win for the gays#and the lesbians#and the queers and homosexuals#I didn't know about the persona 5 one until today#does anyone remember free in this day and era?
31 notes
·
View notes
Note
would it be a normal funny level of pathetic or a weird not funny level of pathetic to make all of your names the password to my phone
it made me laugh because it would be a 48 character password and it’s just silly but would it be weird
do I do it for the laugh? i am fully prepared to do it if it would make you laugh but I won’t do it if you don’t find it funny or y’know
-PPBA ;]
(I’m to embarrassed to send it off anon despite you already knowing who I am I don’t know why)
It is weird funny levels of pathetic, my pretty boy
#totally didn't write poems about us#no sireebob#heterohomo.txt#pathetic pretty boy ollie#I know what you are#gay#gay gay homosexual gay
19 notes
·
View notes
Text
sometimes i start putting effort into paying careful attention to backstory details in tatort episodes so that i don't disrupt continuity when i write fic and then i remember that tatort itself puts 0 effort into continuity and do whatever the hell i want anyway
#this is about how in tödliche tarnung viktor de man is like yeah i trusted chris gabriel so much i even made him my daughter's godfather#and then in spiel auf zeit there's that whole Thing. thorsten voice wow you have a daughter? i didn't know that! (and then he doesn't have#daughter)#anyway i think those two had gay sex#great things to happen to a repressed bisexual (or homosexual? who knows) who's married to a woman he does genuinely love: can't actually#spend much time with her or their daughter for four years because he's a VE and has to gain this guy's trust by whatever means required. an#then your wife dies and your daughter dies and he tries to kill you twice and saves your life once so where the hell do you stand now#fascinating situation
23 notes
·
View notes
Text
If there is at least one thing I can credit FE for doing better than Tales in localization, it's not trying to actively go out of their way for an entire game to avoid subtext or direct text between two men that is romantic or implied romantic. Funny when it's so present that the attempt doesn't even work; infuriating that it was attempted to begin with.
So as much as I often have issues with some of FE's localizations, at least they have a leg up on loc Tales for that.
#DCB Comments#imagine changing entire sentences and vocal tones just to try to avoid it#if anything I'd say at least in FE the locs just... keep what's there like#they could've toned Soren and Houses Yuri down and they didn't. they just kept their lines or in some cases#especially with Houses Yuri I'd say leaned into them#have to specify bc Houses Yuri got to keep his bi agenda. Vesperia Yuri had the unfortunate issue of#the loc not wanting to keep his gay and trying reeeeally hard to avoid it#including altering entire sentences to avoid any woe is them misunderstandings about men having feelings for each other#meanwhile Houses Yuri is free to call men cute and lo and behold everyone loved that for him#they removed and altered a LOT of Vesperia Yuri's personality traits#(including any ability to express real sadness or fear bc woe is them if he's not a cool edgy man)#but they also really changed his tone toward Flynn PLUS some of what they say to each other#and twisted it to make it sound like Yuri was either angry or wasn't actually emotional abt him#forget the way they brought Grant George in for the DE release and made him sound just completely DEAD with zero personality#like. I can tolerate playing Houses dubbed despite my gripes with it (story based stuff)#it didn't feel like they were trying to alter LBGT+ aspects and they even for some rly leaned into it#basically if you haven't played Vesperia Yuri is... really gay coded. the loc pretended not to notice#in fact he's queer + gay coded bc and doesn't fit male gender norms and the gacha games LOVE that with his hair/outfits#Rays mind you is JP only bc it was shut down very quickly in the west and Vesp Yuri's story in Rays is uh#basically it centers around Flynn he loses his shit to protect Flynn and they do the usual like#don't-admit-it's-gay-outright in fictional media by using the ''Yuri's important person'' shtick#but he activates a special power in the middle of utterly raging to get Flynn back from their enemies#funny thing? that game never made it to that arc. I was told in about five months the western ver would've gotten that#but in some way I'm glad it didn't bc who knows how they would've tried to spin that#It's BAFFLING to me how you can get characters in Tales like JAY but the locs shake in their boots at the idea of queer gays#but given how allergic fictional media is to admitting a male character is gay -gestures to Ike and Vesp Yuri-#I'm not surprised I'm just actually angry that the locs try to censor homosexual relationships as much as possible even when they barely ca#if anyone does know Vesp Yuri and is confused on why I'm calling him gay coded despite what the dub did with Judith feel free to ask#bc I do ship them a little bit myself! but I just recognize that canon wise I really can't see him as anything but gay-demiromantic#but again at least FE locs don't shake in their boots anymore abt same sex pairs including men (side eyes Lucius/Raven)
9 notes
·
View notes
Note
hi, i know you headcanon some pathologic characters to be homosexual, like Daniil, Artemy, Yulia, Stakh... what do you think their relationship with their sexuality were throughout their lives? also, i remember in one of your older answers you mentioned Daniil coming out to his mother... how exactly did that happen in your vision?
hello darling this reply has made tumblr give me that "there was an error processing your post" over 15 times now for no good reason. it's like it was too big at first but this is the same length and if you read this it means it sent. anyways.
i had posted something kiiinda similar here (below the cut) including bi characters (eva + the twins) but i had forgor to include stakh + by god i can repeat myself/elaborate (i love. repeating myself <3 for real honestly especially on this) so ooh baby here we
Dankovsky (longest because i'm writing about him so the thoughts are many) knew at a young age (like 11-12) he didn't like girls and instead did boys so he had to come to terms with it in some way Pretty Quickly. to me he was raised christian eastern orthodox, which like all christian denominations comes with its fair share of religious-specific homophobia, he wasn't particularly like. Thrilled per se. + the familial/ancestral culture comes with its own set of expectations around masculinity which homosexuality inherently challenges and the fact that he was already more into cello than like war as a kid made his father raise an eyebrow on him right. so from ages like 11-16, dankovsky was like Well i'm going to have to pretend i don't see it and hope the sky doesn't fall on my head. at around 17 it became evident that was IT really that truly what he was and there was nothing he could possibly do to not make it be this way. it came with a sort of like. acceptance that it just was going to be how it was, but he was already starting to think how he could push the Acting on It part long enough for him to maybe become busy with something else. i think as he grew up he shed the concept of "sin" as he actualized himself atheist so no "hate the sin love the sinner" for him, but you can't really pull the religious guilt out of a man raised religious ykwim. eventually as he accepted that He Was, and that by god it wasn't even a bad thing to be/started Embracing it as one more of his Transgressions (when it. not really is, a transgression comes with a degree of consciousness and will to violate a law or code, the fact that he's gay is just. how it is. that's him forever and that'd be him regardless of context etc), he started assimilating gay codes for himself (the red tie…) to be like. Yes. ykwim. he still had not met a gay person in his life so it truly felt like Him Against the World, but he started being more comfortable with the fact that he was gay. however, it still didn't stop him from started a whole… "i'm not in a relationship rn bc i'm focusing on my studies" mindset. at uni, he truly like. came into his own internally while still trying to maintain a certain ambiguousness outwardly. andrei saw right through that and, even if he's like not gay but bi, he was the first dude daniil met who was also (Loudly) into dudes. dankovsky owes andrei the first like. actual coming out to Someone else than his mommy when andrei would bait him into hanging out with other gay and bi men, dankovsky would sit in a corner not fuckin wit anyone just Soaking In The Homosexuality In The Air, and when andrei went "u got a problem with that? you homophobic?🤨" dankovsky had to go like "i don't have a problem with it at all… when it's other people" [implied: i might deal with it not too well when it's me myself]. and from that point on he was like ah fuck me [not literally] why do i bother being insecure about it. from ages 20+ he was still very much in his Married To My Work Era + as he founded Thanatica he tried to lay low to not get investigated and being very loudly homosexual was not the best way to "not make waves" so even as he settled in himself with the fact that Well he's gay and he's gonna be gay forever so he better live with it, he still stayed closeted for his safety. i think from ages 18 to current game-day 28, not getting laid pardon the frankness led to him developing like an internally Fucking Crazy relationship with love and eroticism and he might have kept himself from entering relationships because he needed someone who Understood He'd Want To Eat Him. (love wins!)
re:coming out to his momma i think she had had her Doubts for a while yknow has had her Doubts. his dad too, but from his dad's perspective it felt deeply Painful (bc when the son is gay it is the father's masculinity that is threatened.. i've spoken about it on the post i've linked in the beginning) whereas his mom didn't have that My Masculinity Threatened. dankovsky knew he was gay since age like 11-12 but only came out at around 14-15, when it became obvious for him and hard to ignore, especially as people begin to have little boyfriends and girlfriends at this age. he told his mom first because he was closest to her and she was like.
she believed him from the beginning because she had had her Doubts. for a while she didn't quite know what to do with this information as it all dawned on her that it likely meant no grandkids, no daughter-in-law to whom she could give her pretty jewelry and so on… but also i think she like. could relate her son's homosexuality to like. fucking Tchaikovsky. who attempted suicide because his marriage to a woman made him so miserable. so she was like… well. that's just how it is isn't it. she's just gonna have to make peace with it whether she likes it or not. i think eventually she came to the conclusion that she spent 9 months building him from her blood and bones and a full day putting him out in the world so it would be stupid to be mad at him for that. + that's god's doing isn't it. she can't be mad at god. and if god's mad at her son he can take it to himself. etc .
Burakh for the longest time um. Didn't know. i think he realized that about himself genuinely age 26 in the 12 days. he's going through an entire coming-of-age/coming-into-place story and i think that includes a realization story lol. i think for the longest time he just thought he didn't love anyone period. up until 20 methinks he was like "well i'm just a late bloomer". then he went to war as a medic and was like "well i'm just so fucked up in the head my mind's full of corpses that's why there's no place for love". then he went home and… lord almighty. for years he thought was just not made for love because he truly. hadn't looked the other way (he's just like me fr fr). he went from not knowing what a closet was to realizing he was in it and the door was ajar to being out and in a man's arm in the span of 12 days. he didn't really have the time to brood about what it meant for his future/himself/his relationship to his people for him to be homosexual because love slapped him across the face and he fell on his ass. as his whole story is about finding his own path and learning to cope with doing things that might not be approved of him and living with choices that are of love regardless it's truly just like. learn to cope FAST. you have way more problems. + as i think the herb brides Know i think he's not given too much grief by his community and doesn't have the religious trauma background of dankovsky. also since his parents are. well dead. he doesn't have to respond to them + his dad textually is like You're gonna have to do something boy. (and that something might displease him but that's out of his hands. and into burakh's).
.
Yulia knew early too like 12-13. she always was a tomboy as a kid and almost just like… naturally blossomed into a masc lesbian. i think from early on she was like. ok well we're coping with that. she already was going against social conventions by being an educated woman a woman in ""typically"" male professions a masculine-dressed woman so at this point the fact that she liked women that was like. well if you don't like it tough luck buddy. she always had a relatively distant (if loving) relationship with her parents so she didn't feel the need to justify herself to them + won't lie they saw it coming. they had it comin… she was not in any relationships for a while because she's kinda like Dry of a person/passionate about things most people just don't see/don't fuck with so while she is charismatic and handsome and knew she could be desired she didn't have any long-term relationship before eva because you truly need a girl who's a lil bit crazy to handle her. and vice versa. so love wins. i think that while she might not have frequented lesbian spaces like bars because her ass does not do well with crowds i think she never felt like she was So Alone like Only Lesbian on Earth. i think she did feel a sense of loneliness about it but it was also mixed with a deep sense of Well I'm Here and I'm One So Someone Like Me Exists.
.
Stakh for a little while was also that "well i'm kinda too fucked up for love" and he was also fighting for his life to be seen as a good student a good protégé a good foster son so romantic love was Far from his mind. i think he realized he was gay around age like 15-16 when it all starts to Dawn on you y'know everything Dawns on you. he was very quickly like. well that's how the cookie crumbles. i think there was a sort of immediate acceptance about the Being Gay factor but more of a restraint about acting on it because he too was like Married to The Student Behavior and didn't want to risk losing his place by isidor's side, especially since he didn't know how isidor would react to him being gay (i know what isidor did to that old man so i know he wouldn't have cared but rubin is not a mind-reader). it was truly like. well i am and i can't do much about it but i'm soo focused rn. as 18-20 came around the corner and his relationship with isidor truly felt like he was fighting for his life trying to be seen as a good student he was like I'm either going to war or becoming a monk. he was fully willing to commit to lifelong monkish celibacy because he's always been. kinda dry. kinda with issues. + i think subconsciously he was trying to not let Desire creep up on him because it would distract him from the menkhu way (nice dichotomy idiot what lies outside of it etc). he went to war [p1 lore which i abide by] and. well when you put a bunch of fit young men together away from the women of course something like this would happen. anyways he comes home having acted on his homosexuality which he is fine with + feels kinda like a weight being lifted off his shoulders but he stil hasn't tasted Desire ykwim. Want. Hunger in the lover sense. but he's like. shrugs. whatever. monk it is. he doesn't become a monk. he clings to being isidor's foster son until his knuckles go white. it ends up being for nothing. grief and anger scythe him right. and in what follows he bonds with someone who's Fucked up and who Knows Hunger and Desire and omg flushed emoji etc. (+ my belief when dankovsky comes to peter's loft to talk about god-knows-what they kinda realize pretty fast He's Just Like Me Fr and dankovsky appreciates his + peter's company kinda like he appreciated Just Sitting There surrounded by gay and bi men even if they barely talk. just knowing you're like. Not Alone. etc)
.
bit long. sorrey.
#dankovsky lore#burakh lore#yulia lore#rubin lore#there are others i see as homosexuals. because it's a beautiful world out there#some of the older kids mostly because they're literally just at the age i came out to my parence...#i don't have like Deep Thoughts about most of them because is just how it is innit. they have other problems rn#the two i could add are notkin and khan mostly because 1) funny to me. mostly. 2) drawing capella Knowing currently so#notkin knew quite young (like 11) he Didn't Like Girls but didn't know how he felt about boys until 15 (spoilers: oooooh sonny)#he doesn't have parents to answer to so he's just like. well it is how it is. who care.#when he gets teased by others like ''u think girls have cooties??'' he's like motherfucker it's not about cooties#[then the kids realize and they're like. omg i so sorry... i didn't mean to be homophobic i just thought you were weird]#khan knew quite young he liked boys (also like 11-12) but didn't know how he felt about girls until 15 (spoilers: it's a no from him dawg#& when he realizes what that means for the kains' future he's both like. oh the agonies. and also it's not my problem i'm going to college
38 notes
·
View notes
Text
i think probably the funniest thing that my dad said to me today was when he was remarking how different me and my sister are and he was like. she prefers being in out in the wilderness, you're happy in the middle of the city; she's training to fight wildfires and you're this crazy skilled musician; she would jump out of a plane and you like to work in the library; she's even gay
and i was like. Well,
#my dad laughed and said 'imagine if i had TWO gay daughters!' and i was just standing there like#Well!#LOL#i didn't straight up say 'father i too am a homosexual.' but i did say 'well i'm. unspecified'#it was a really funny moment though. probably funnier than he realizes#i wanna talk about me#also i guess this answers my own suspicions about my sister being gay LOL?#i thought she might be but we never talk so it never came up LMAO#well. i guess that's two things we have in common now. same color hair and gay. other than that we're still totally unalike#i'm almost more surprised that she said she would jump out of a plane though#i know she wants to be a wildfirefighter but smokejumping. gd damn#i know she's already way cooler than me but like. damn go ahead and make it worse why don't you lmao#also for the record my dad is. apparently very cool with and even amused by the idea of his daughters being gay?#which i suppose is a comfort to know. a little odd maybe but definitely better than the alternative#also. 'crazy skilled musician' is (paraphrased at least) in his words. not mine...
7 notes
·
View notes
Text
jacobean but not in the ruffles and church and shakespeare kind of way but in the ammunitions and homosexuality and space kind of way
#this week on: ginger needs to go to bed#not that the jacobean era didn't have homosexuality#this is a bad joke#sorry#wolf 359#w359#daniel jacobi#kepcobi#he likes the men folk#i know too little about the actual jacobean era to name 3 things#like actual relevant things#it's just shakespeare#lace#and god#and then you die
11 notes
·
View notes
Text
Like gay sex is always gay sex and I wouldn't call it "Sapphic sex" or anything dumb like that but I have had a problem with calling myself and my relationship business gay for like a long time now
#I mean yes I did identify as a lesbian for like 2 years but I came out to like 5 people and I didn't use the word lesbian in front of#all of them. And I used homosexual instead of lesbian for quite awhile after coming out online too. And this is because#Being out as a lesbian is NOT fun!! like I was bullied so much for dating girls and even just for Looking like I date girls before#I ever did. People do not like it!! And also I was trans when I thought that I wasn't into men so even saying lesbian was like a huge no no#irl for a long time. Like I distinctly remember times when I said it because I wanted to be quiet about it#And im pretty quiet about being bisexual now too which I try to do because I don't think it makes sense to talk#To strangers about being bisexual when I'm in a straight relationship#like straight people don't care about gay stuff they just want to talk to me about straight stuff#so my ssa is hardly relevant. But I have been thinking about it sometimes lately#and I suspect I have a bit of anxiety about people knowing I'm bisexual. My grandparents and my older relatives don't approve#and I was unusual as a kid because many of my peers did not approve#and I guess I really care about people's approval since I just prefer to be quiet about it#I mean I won't lie or refuse to talk about my ex girlfriends and I never have gone out of my way to hide it#but it certainly seems like I have some shame about it that I've never really thought about#Or maybe me not wanting to call myself a lesbian even when I thought I was was just FORESHADOWING#Imagine just being so wrong about yourself on so many levels. For YEARS. Stupid 15 year old
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
I need them. Both. He could be our third. Old man yaoi. ♡
#me: ''this crush is over. it Was temporary‚ just like I thought''#also me: sees fanart of those gay old men and gets so flustered and faggy#I wasn't embarrassed about it BEFORE but now I am. maybe just bc it's 12am I know I get mushier late at night. idk.#anyway. old man yaoi is literally real but only bc I want to be part of it#I have had their ship tag blocked for a while bc it used to be something I didn't like seeing but like. idk what's happening?????#roswell new youtube video clickbait title: exposure therapy gone wrong (gone homosexual??? 👀😳🏳️🌈)#roz posts#crush tag#I want to tag the existing f/o So Bad but I can't do it. I can't. I'm shy now.#update: um#♡: 🔨🎰🥃#♡: 🍕🍝⏱️
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
I think it's funny how the scrottie mcboogerballs episode of south park made it seem like the writers don't want fans looking too deeply into their show, but also I am physically incapable of analysing everything I like and have sooooo much I want to say. But as of right now what I'm the most curious about is Cartman's mental state because he is clearly mentally ill and probably a sociopath of some kind, and I want to analyze everything he does, which is kind of difficult when sometimes his behavior will do a total 180 simply because it was convenient for whatever episode or situation he's in
#the pyre#like in go god go when he travel a bazillion years into the future and is totally unfazed by the fact that everyone he knew is dead#I don't believe for a second that he would be as unfazed as he was even if he is a sociopath or psychopath#bc even if he doesn't truly love his mom for example#he loves the things she lets him get away with#and he would not be able to survive in a future where he does not have the upper hand#and yeah the athetists treated him like their saviour and he had some leeway with them#but still#there's no way he truly didn't care at all#to me this is ooc#I''m bringing this up bc every so often I think about the drawings he made of like Kyle Butters and a few of the other boys#having sex in his journal#and go completely insane#like there sooo much stuff regarding Cartman's sexuality in south park#prob bc trey is kinda gay so he'd know what it's like#like he clearly thinks about homosexuality a lot and this could be his way of exploring it.... remember cupid me...?
0 notes
Text
Time to read about lovecraftian viscous little mass being adopted by a scavenger living off stuff found on a massive giant bear in a dystopian city.
Yes that's how Jeff Vandermeer's book Borne has been sold to me.
I'm sure it's gonna be clear and concise like mister Vandermeer's works always seems to be 🤭
I'm sure I'm not gonna end up irrationally attached to the eldritch horror and have an existential crisis...
#borne#having read the southern reach trilogy#i know it's gonna be wild#and tbh the summary of annihilation at first doesn't seem this weird#a weird ass zone where stuff happen seems very classic in SF#but then you read that and it's really weird stuff happening#and then you end up reading about repressed homosexuality#and you didn't even sign up for that in the beginning#and you have ten more questions#but you'll never know#but for borne the summary is already wild in itself#so I can't wait to see how much wilder it is because you really can't resume whatever is happening#and have like 10 unanswered questions at the end#anyway really want to dive in the weird fiction genre#i really need to try China Mieville but i don't know where to start and also the guy has been very hyped by someone whose whole work is on#weird fiction and now im scared#misc
1 note
·
View note
Text
I could make a serious Wicked review and talk about the vocals and the choreography and the costumes and the sets, which are all great, but this is tumblr, and I know that all of these aspects will not matter nearly as much as me reviewing the movie by how much gay subtext they put into it, so that's exactly what I'm gonna do.
Elphaba and Glinda are either holding hands or have their arms linked for about 70% of this movie. Literally, after they officially become friends these girls are attached at the hip.
'What Is This Feeling?' remains about as gay as it usually is, but I will highlight that they lie awake at night thinking about each other which. I know what you are etc etc
The scene where they dance together is. I have no words. That was beautiful. Both actresses put so much emotion into the sequence. And there's a moment where Glinda puts her hand on Elphaba's face, almost like she's brushing away the tears there, and that shit made me cry as well.
'Popular' is insanely homosexual. There's a scene where they're laying down on the bed looking into each other's eyes, and Glinda shifts to basically be on top of Elphaba. My jaw was on the floor. Just lots of touching and Looks all throughout.
When they go to see the Wizard all that casual touching I mentioned previously is multiplied by tenfold, and there are several moments where Elphaba looks at Glinda for reassurance, which was very sweet.
'Defying Gravity' made me just as emotional as I knew it would. I do wish they had hugged but honestly with all the handholding and the staring into each other's eyes, and Glinda wrapping the cloak around Elphaba, they gave us plenty. Once again the acting caught me by surprise (specially from Ariana), both of them communicate so much with just looks.
Anyway my overall thoughts are, these bitches gay, good for them. They did not tone down the subtext at all (like I know some people were worried would happen), and while they didn't make anything explicit either (which I never expected them to*), I'm confident that both Cynthia and Ariana understood the assignment in regards to the kind of relationship Glinda and Elphaba have in canon, and that was enough for me.
*I will admit that a secret corner of my little lesbian heart hoped beyond hope that they would include the scene from the book where Elphaba canonically kisses Glinda (iirc it's supposed to be during Defying Gravity), but like, I always knew they wouldn't.
#wicked#wicked 2024#wicked movie#gelphie#elphaba x glinda#elphaba thropp#glinda upland#galinda upland#ariana grande#cynthia erivo#lesbian#queer#wlw#lgbt#wicked spoilers#wicked movie spoilers
10K notes
·
View notes