#I didn't know about homosexuality
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I always feel mildly bemused when I read people post about stuff like systemic sexism in fandoms, particularly things like about how people complain more about female characters but ignore male characters with similar faults, or the fandoms loving gay ships but not making as much fanworks for lesbian ones.
Part of this is just because I like female characters (despite being male, I tend to prefer things with female leads etc) and I'm not that involved in a lot of fandom arguments nor do I read a lot of shipfics, so I only hear about a lot of the sexism when people complain about it. Which is kind of funny to me in the fact it must exist, but I'm just conveniently shielded from it.
The other reason is some of my earliest fandoms I got involved in were female-majority casts, so most people do ship the women. Like, I think Equestria Daily once put out an apology after they posted a Braeburn m/m fic (admittedly, the outrage from the bronies back then in 2012 or whenever was probably out of homophobia, which isn't nice either, but the point still stands that they were no issues with w/w shipfics and to this day they are the vast, vast majority of shipping fics (mostly because once you've shipped Braeburn, Sorin' and Big Mac together there aren't that many other guys left to ship, but nonetheless)). Or like Barbie with its vastly superior chemistry between the joint female leads over the threadbare male love interest they've thrown in. Even when the male leads are good, it's popular to ship the girls.
I don't think I have anything substantial to say. I just don't understand the issues other men (or indeed women) have with female characters (and women and femininity in general) (I mean I do understand I just find it bizarre it when like a friend of mine once said he wasn't really interested in stories with female leads. I don't know, maybe read more books with better female protags? I have a bookshelf's worth if you want suggestions) (also like when people suggest there needs to be more talk about good female characters like, most of my favourites are already females and I will gladly talk about them till the cows come home). But also that's just me.
Also I kind of do like m/m ships a fraction more but that's like 90% because I'm bi and so, you know, I like seeing guys together because I kind of would like to get together with a guy if the opportunity arose. But I mean other than that they're just ships. Like sure there can be a different vibe or flavour to w/w or m/m or straight ships, but I mean if they're good characters why should my interest depend on their genders? I read things to experience the lives of others, I don't want to just see stories that match my experience. And sometimes I empathise most with the female characters so like, you need to approach characters with an open mind. I don't know.
OK I'm rambling now. I think I made my point. I'm not sure what it was anymore but I guess it's that women in fiction are cool and I don't know what everyone else's problem is.
#also yeah just because I don't commonly experience this stuff doesn't mean I think it doesn't exist#because I've seen enough arguments about ATLA and TLOK to know people get annoyed with female leads more easily#to say nothing of other reported outrages in fandoms#And for my layton fans I have no issue with Kat as a lead. I think her in the anime is great. I just dislike the game lmj#but back to atla. I enjoy zukoXsokka stuff#pretty much just because it's kind of hot or cute#like I don't seriously ship them#I'm technically a SokkaXSukki shipper#a MaiXZuko shipper and a KataraXAang shipper#because I tend to just accept whatever ship is presented to me as the end result#but also because I was like 7 or 8 at the time#I didn't know about homosexuality#and I hadn't watched the book 2 finale nor book 3 at all#people take shipping to seriously too though like does it matter who you think are cute together?#like I ship Rainbow and AJ in mlp but also AJ and Rarity#and Flutterdash is also cute#like it's not like I believe only one will work#they're made up characters. Their personalities and existence are entirely contingent upon our choices#they don't actually have fixed or true selves#like we can dig into Layton's psyche but in reality we're kind of just making stuff up based on what we believe to be true#Level 5 did not write him to be a traumatised character but they did by accident#like that's fun to explore please keep doing it#but like....... there's not a correct interpretation#no one should insist on that#not even the writer if you believe in 'death of the author'#no wonder people on this site seem to have hated English classes growing up#they didn't learn to have fun debating alternate interpretations of things#anyway read books written by women about women they're great#if you take nothing else away from this rant#it's that
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I love that even with all the lengths Stronghart went through to hide Kazuma's identity (using a mask to hide his eyes and a cloak to cover everything else, banning him from even speaking), the minute Ryunosuke saw him for the first time he suspected it. From his posture alone, they knew each other for about a year and were separated for like eight months and Ryunosuke could still identify his bbf from the way he stood like... Kazuma lost his memory, his identity, his... everything and Ryunosuke still clocked it, even though he literally thinks Kazuma is dead, that the prosecutor's masked apprentice is the whole reason he's even there at all.
Literally what else could Stronghart have done to hide Kazuma's presence from Ryunosuke, he did as much as he could but still Ryunosuke felt it immediately. This feels gayer than most of the yaoi I've come across, this is a major plot point in a romantic drama, this can't not be a trope in one of the kdramas my dad likes to watch on Netflix.
#I feel like if Ryunosuke was like 10% less busy he would've figured it out completely#he just has things to deal with...#also i love how he really wants to be a lawyer now when at the start of the series he was Not Into It#he did it for kazumas dream and bc he didn't want to let susato down and ruin the trip for her#but now hes fully intending on getting his own lawyer certifications and planning to wear both his own and Kazumas armbands#he started out so aimless but now he's found the thing he wants to be and its so nice#anyway barok has homosexual feelings for that mad scientist guy and I know we're supposed to feel bad for him bc his brother was 'killed'#but i dont really feel it yet#he needs to be nicer to me#i do love how worried Ryunosuke was for him after the attack that was kinda cute#they have the opposite views being 'just bc you're an asshole doesn't mean I think you should die' and 'i wont mourn the wicked'#also Ryunosuke being so convinced about the reapers curse is fascinating to me... it gives me ideas for my phoenix!Naruhodos au#andromeda plays tgaa#andromeda plays#asoryuu
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"queer women", "[celebrity name] identifies as queer", "queers in media", "queers in sport", "queer actress"
#i saw article called 'Kaitlyn Weaver' comes out' and she calls herself 'queer woman'#queer queer queer queer queer shut the fuck up there are words that aren't slurs use them#lesbian is not a scary word#gay is not a scary word#bi is not a scary word#queer doesn't explain much#how do i know that you're actually homosexual and not just annoying heterosexual trying to be cool freaky mushroom#i didn't even know about that word before i started interacting more with english media#radblr
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only shoving this here because a lot of dnp lesbians are the same kinds of folk who are trixie n katya lesbians but i am like, ceo of being fans of duo creators and like... listening to how fondly trixie and katya talk about each other after watching the fucking gaming video yesterday and how dan and phil comfortably are with each other is like. and also after texting my own best friend. it's crazy how love is in the air in so many ways
#astra.txt#i am so serious when i say that when i think about how dnp love each other i think about my platonic best friend#and how he literally changed my life so irrevocably that it made rewatching basically i'm gay like. fuck me up#because i didn't realize until i met him how horrible life was before i was 18 and he is like.#trixie referring to katya said in a podcast she is like God to me and while i like personally don't want to make that comparison w him#i do think he was like a gift of God in my life. so in this way i really understand 18 year old dan howell#because 18 year old mare was kind of experiencing the same things albeit zero homosexuality involved#me & my guy are stereotypical weird lesbian & transmasc guy best friends . u know how it goes#sorry to derail my own post about trixie and katya into talking about this guy but i love him so bad#it's like almost annoying how fond i am of my best friend
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gang i have to share this P. G. Wodehouse quote with you all because ever since I found it I can't stop thinking about it. it's from a letter he wrote when he was 78 years old to his friend Guy Bolton (many thanks to P. G. Wodehouse: A Life in Letters)
I have been on the sick list myself, but am better now. Inflamed bladder or chill on the bladder or something, the symptoms being agony when I passed water, as the expression is. It brought back the brave old days when I used to get clap.
he really said "yeah the pain from my bladder issue reminds of the days when I used to have so much sex I repeatedly got venereal disease"
#red randomness#p. g. wodehouse#he was so known for not having sex with his beloved wife#that i truly didn't expect this at all#i feel like i see a lot of people saying with a great deal of confidence that he was sex-repulsed ace#especially due to the wife thing#but while he certainly may have been ace on some level#i feel like at the very least this casts some doubt on the sex-repulsed part lmao#i suppose it's possible he was lying but wouldn't this be such a specific and unnecessary lie in this context?#especially for a private letter to a friend he'd known and worked with for decades#because he really didn't even need to bring it up#of course i am open to evidence to the contrary#i just dislike seeing overconfident opinions broadly prevail#even when aspects of a real person's life suggest the possibility of otherwise#the study of history is meant to breed discussion!#and something that goes against the grain of past assumption is certainly worth discussing imo#also very grateful to the unpublished monograph by George Simmers about Honeysuckle Cottage#because that's how i found out about this letter in the first place!#great monograph mr. simmers please publish it someday#opened my third eye about the potential latent homosexuality in that story (among other things)#and at risk of having someone get mad at me or say i'm trying to like. diminish or slander the ace community by saying this#please don't assume that. that's why i've been afraid to share this before.#i'm not confidently stating wodehouse is anything. he's a real man who lived and i didn't know him#but by the same token neither does anyone else#i'm just as tired of people in history who have a fair amount of suggestion of being aroace being broadly assumed gay#despite evidence to the contrary#or people confidently assigning queerness to historical figures when evidence of them being queer in any way is ambiguous at best#everything in history is a maybe. we just collect facts and analyze them.#and my current analysis based on this line is that i'm not sure i think he was very sex-repulsed after all#(but like. i'm not going around insulting or fighting people about it in dms or something. and neither should you)
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Today I learned that "Makoharu" can either be:
• A persona 5 ship entailing Makoto Niijima and Haru Okumura.
Or
• A free! ship entailing Makoto Tachibana and Haruka Nanase.

And I think that's beautiful. Truly, the ultimate ship.
#Makoharu#wlw mlm solidarity#a win for the gays#and the lesbians#and the queers and homosexuals#I didn't know about the persona 5 one until today#does anyone remember free in this day and era?
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would it be a normal funny level of pathetic or a weird not funny level of pathetic to make all of your names the password to my phone
it made me laugh because it would be a 48 character password and it’s just silly but would it be weird
do I do it for the laugh? i am fully prepared to do it if it would make you laugh but I won’t do it if you don’t find it funny or y’know
-PPBA ;]
(I’m to embarrassed to send it off anon despite you already knowing who I am I don’t know why)
It is weird funny levels of pathetic, my pretty boy
#totally didn't write poems about us#no sireebob#heterohomo.txt#pathetic pretty boy ollie#I know what you are#gay#gay gay homosexual gay
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sometimes i start putting effort into paying careful attention to backstory details in tatort episodes so that i don't disrupt continuity when i write fic and then i remember that tatort itself puts 0 effort into continuity and do whatever the hell i want anyway
#this is about how in tödliche tarnung viktor de man is like yeah i trusted chris gabriel so much i even made him my daughter's godfather#and then in spiel auf zeit there's that whole Thing. thorsten voice wow you have a daughter? i didn't know that! (and then he doesn't have#daughter)#anyway i think those two had gay sex#great things to happen to a repressed bisexual (or homosexual? who knows) who's married to a woman he does genuinely love: can't actually#spend much time with her or their daughter for four years because he's a VE and has to gain this guy's trust by whatever means required. an#then your wife dies and your daughter dies and he tries to kill you twice and saves your life once so where the hell do you stand now#fascinating situation
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gonna explode if I don't tell you this sorry. I saw you namedrop alistair earlier and was like 🙄 then kept reading and realized you were talking about the guy from Frasier not dragon age. never been so happy. great episode btw
I KNOW NOTHING ABOUT DRAGON AGE!! alistair burke as depicted by patrick stewart in frasier s11e03 is the only alistair i have room for in my heart.
#appreciate this ask. to be so honest i didn't even know there was another popular alistair#glad you know now that actually im just absolutely insane about this frasier episode#anonymous#capella speaks#when i finally post the fics about him ill link them here probably. idk how many of my mutuals and followers care abt frasier but still#homosexuality in frasier
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If there is at least one thing I can credit FE for doing better than Tales in localization, it's not trying to actively go out of their way for an entire game to avoid subtext or direct text between two men that is romantic or implied romantic. Funny when it's so present that the attempt doesn't even work; infuriating that it was attempted to begin with.
So as much as I often have issues with some of FE's localizations, at least they have a leg up on loc Tales for that.
#DCB Comments#imagine changing entire sentences and vocal tones just to try to avoid it#if anything I'd say at least in FE the locs just... keep what's there like#they could've toned Soren and Houses Yuri down and they didn't. they just kept their lines or in some cases#especially with Houses Yuri I'd say leaned into them#have to specify bc Houses Yuri got to keep his bi agenda. Vesperia Yuri had the unfortunate issue of#the loc not wanting to keep his gay and trying reeeeally hard to avoid it#including altering entire sentences to avoid any woe is them misunderstandings about men having feelings for each other#meanwhile Houses Yuri is free to call men cute and lo and behold everyone loved that for him#they removed and altered a LOT of Vesperia Yuri's personality traits#(including any ability to express real sadness or fear bc woe is them if he's not a cool edgy man)#but they also really changed his tone toward Flynn PLUS some of what they say to each other#and twisted it to make it sound like Yuri was either angry or wasn't actually emotional abt him#forget the way they brought Grant George in for the DE release and made him sound just completely DEAD with zero personality#like. I can tolerate playing Houses dubbed despite my gripes with it (story based stuff)#it didn't feel like they were trying to alter LBGT+ aspects and they even for some rly leaned into it#basically if you haven't played Vesperia Yuri is... really gay coded. the loc pretended not to notice#in fact he's queer + gay coded bc and doesn't fit male gender norms and the gacha games LOVE that with his hair/outfits#Rays mind you is JP only bc it was shut down very quickly in the west and Vesp Yuri's story in Rays is uh#basically it centers around Flynn he loses his shit to protect Flynn and they do the usual like#don't-admit-it's-gay-outright in fictional media by using the ''Yuri's important person'' shtick#but he activates a special power in the middle of utterly raging to get Flynn back from their enemies#funny thing? that game never made it to that arc. I was told in about five months the western ver would've gotten that#but in some way I'm glad it didn't bc who knows how they would've tried to spin that#It's BAFFLING to me how you can get characters in Tales like JAY but the locs shake in their boots at the idea of queer gays#but given how allergic fictional media is to admitting a male character is gay -gestures to Ike and Vesp Yuri-#I'm not surprised I'm just actually angry that the locs try to censor homosexual relationships as much as possible even when they barely ca#if anyone does know Vesp Yuri and is confused on why I'm calling him gay coded despite what the dub did with Judith feel free to ask#bc I do ship them a little bit myself! but I just recognize that canon wise I really can't see him as anything but gay-demiromantic#but again at least FE locs don't shake in their boots anymore abt same sex pairs including men (side eyes Lucius/Raven)
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I need them. Both. He could be our third. Old man yaoi. ♡
#me: ''this crush is over. it Was temporary‚ just like I thought''#also me: sees fanart of those gay old men and gets so flustered and faggy#I wasn't embarrassed about it BEFORE but now I am. maybe just bc it's 12am I know I get mushier late at night. idk.#anyway. old man yaoi is literally real but only bc I want to be part of it#I have had their ship tag blocked for a while bc it used to be something I didn't like seeing but like. idk what's happening?????#roswell new youtube video clickbait title: exposure therapy gone wrong (gone homosexual??? 👀😳🏳️🌈)#roz posts#crush tag#I want to tag the existing f/o So Bad but I can't do it. I can't. I'm shy now.#update: um#♡: 🔨🎰🥃#♡: 🍕🍝⏱️
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My parents let me and my siblings have a ken and another male doll that I don't know the name of. With them and two other dolls I made a polyamorous relationship before I even knew that when two girls are dating they are still called girlfriends instead of a word I hadn't been taught yet.
There was a black haired doll called Janet and she was dating Barbie. Barbie was also dating Ken. Ken and Janet knew about each other and were cool but they themselves weren't dating each other. But Ken was also dating the other guy doll, I think I named him Ryan but I don't remember. Ryan wasn't dating Barbie or Janet but was cool.
So I made a poly relationship between (the specific labels are based on impressions I had of the characters before I knew the words for it) a lesbian astronomer (who was probably a trans woman), a bisexual trillionaire who has too many jobs to name, a pansexual himbo (who might be a trans guy), and a quiet gay who was into botany.
(Ryan and Barbie would bond over both Ken and botany while Janet and Ken bond over Barbie and having a near black thumb when it comes to gardening)
#lgbtq#barbie#polyamory#polyamourous#lesbian#bisexual#pansexual#gay#homosexual#I am pretty sure these words are the best to describe how these characters were attracted to people#I don't know for sure but they are based on the impressions that 7yo me had about them that I just didn't have the words for yet#ken is a himbo#Ken might have been a trans man (ftm) as well but I can't remember#I know that in hindsight that Janet was most likely a trans woman (mtf) tho
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Transcript and links to Reddit under the Read more:
I miss my husband so goddamn much
February 27th, 2025
I (35M) divorced my husband (36M) three years ago. And God, I miss him. I asked for a divorce for a few reasons, most of which being that his depression got exponentially worse day after day and he refused to seek treatment. Sometimes he wouldn't even go into work and ended up getting fired from his job. I stayed with him for so fucking long, praying that one day he would start trying to get better. It was all I ever wanted, but that day didn't come. I sobbed the entire time signing those papers, and when I handed them to him and asked for a divorce, he just gave me the emptiest, deadest look and signed them without a word. My heart felt like it had been shattered with a hammer, anger and sadness and fear tied together in the world's tightest, ugliest knot and inset deep into my chest.
I put on a brave face for my friends, tried to frame it as shackles coming off and a new beginning, but it was a lie. It just hurt, and it keeps hurting, and it will never stop hurting. He was my soulmate. I'll never love anyone like I loved him. He used to be so sweet and loving, so passionate and happy and every other wonderful thing a man could want from another.
They say each day gets easier, but it isn't for me. It's been three years and I'm still reaching over to the other side of the bed in the morning to pull him close, and it always stings when my hands touch fabric and not his skin. It's been three years and I'm still expecting to see his car in the driveway when I get home from work. It's been three years and my heart isn't any less broken than the day he left.
I've been stalking his socials, I'll admit. He's been getting back to the gym, started meds, and I see him smiling so genuinely in these photos. He looks so incredible. Maybe if I had just waited, he would have changed his mind and went to a doctor like he is now? Or was it me that held him down? Was I making it worse?
I hope not. I wanna go over to his place and just fall into his arms and beg him to take me back. Maybe he's wishing the same thing about me. If there's even a chance I could have my boy back I feel like I should try. I'll never know otherwise.
EDIT: One: I am a homosexual man. My husband is a homosexual man. I am not a woman. Yes, I know I'm effeminate and kind of emotional. Get creative.
Two: my husband was a binge drinker. He refused treatment no matter how much I begged. We got antidepressants but he wouldn't take them. I know he's started meds now because he's posted about them and his 2 yrs sober chip that he got last month.
Three: I never stopped loving him. I never loved him any less. Near the end of our marriage, I started drinking to cope. The second I realized I was, I realized he was dragging me down with him, and I couldn't help him anymore. I didn't dip the second it got hard. Many of you are being kind of rude. I'll accept that I wasn't the perfect husband, nobody is. But claims that I never loved him are just wrong and make me feel sick to my stomach.
EDIT 2: No, I am not the catalyst for this. His depression started when his young brother died terribly and unexpectedly. It's not because he just hated me so much. We were childhood sweethearts and had been together for years when this happened.
[UPDATE] I met my husband that I divorced 3 years ago
March 2nd, 2025
Well, with Reddit's advice, I did it. A few days ago, I called my (35M) ex-husband (36M) whom I divorced after 6 years when he refused to seek treatment for his depression.
I called him later in the evening. It was the first time we'd spoken since a bit of trouble he'd had while he was still drinking 2 1/2 years ago. He picked up on the second ring. Our conversation was a little stilted at first, as to be expected, but he said he was really glad to hear from me. We ended up meeting up for coffee yesterday as so many of you suggested. I'll admit: it was kind of hard to see him, but in a good way? He looked so much better than the last time I had seen him, but he looked exactly like the man I married. He had put off a ton of weight (he gained like 75ish pounds during his struggle with depression, and before some dick says so, I didn't leave him because of his weight gain), he looked way healthier and very put together. I'll just say it: he looked incredibly hot. What made it hard was that I couldn't kiss him hello like I used to. But God, the way his eyes lit up when he saw me, I barely needed to.
We got our coffee and sat, and he updated me a little on his life in the last 3 years.
What really turned his life around was in part the divorce but moreso a DUI (nobody was hurt, he was caught a few blocks from his apartment). He's since gone to rehab and AA, gotten his license back, and had to use a breathalyzer whenever he started his car for a while. He hasn't had a drop of alcohol since and I told him I was so fucking proud of him. He's also started antidepressants, and made a point of telling me that they're not SSRIs, but when I asked what that meant he got embarrassed and told me nevermind (???). Bottom line is that they've been helping him, he's back to being a gym rat, and he's almost completely turned his life around. This was around the point I started tearing up. It just felt so good knowing he was okay. Better than okay, he was *good*.
I also apologized to him for not sticking by him. He cut me off and said I had nothing to apologize for. He was a wreck, and I was being dragged down with him. That also felt good to hear. I apologized for not contacting him much during the last 3 years. That apology, he accepted.
He was dating someone for a few months, too. He broke up with him once he tried to get him to drink on New Year's. He seemed dismissive of the guy. Guess it wasn't too serious.
We got up and went on a walk after a few hours, and I think we both realized it felt like a first date. I had to stop myself from trying to hold his hand at a few points, I'll admit. We ended up sitting on a bench in a nearby park, and I confessed.
I told him I missed him more than anything, how I never stopped loving him, and how if he wanted to, I'd love to try again from the beginning this time. We'd go to couples' therapy, keep our heads above the water, and take it slow. He was quiet for a minute before he told me something. He said he was doing better now, but there may be a time where he sunk low again. Depression isn't easily cured, and he was far from cured. He still had bad days, but he said there would be one difference: he promised he would never stop trying to improve. He was never going to give up like he did before, and refused to neglect me like he used to. If I was willing to accept that truth, he was willing to try again. I agreed, and he pulled me into an embrace and snuck a kiss to my temple. You know when it's the first warm day of spring after a cold, harsh winter, and the soft breeze and basking sun hit your skin at the same time? It felt something like that, to the 1000th degree. After a while he walked me back to my car and squeezed my hand goodbye, and the second I got inside I started sobbing like a baby. Happy tears, though.
I'm currently sitting in bed, kicking my feet like a teenage girl, texting him back and forth to schedule an actual date. He said he'd plan everything, and try his best to make up for the birthdays and anniversaries he missed. He said it would "knock my socks off." What a dork. I love being in love. Not gonna lie, this is gonna be a bit hard to explain to my friends and family. Not looking forward to those conversations, but right now I don't care. My man loves me.
Thank you to everyone who had kind words to say, and all the people that messaged me with sympathy and advice. I hope we all find happiness, and love if we want it. I never would have made the leap if y'all hadn't encouraged me. Best of luck to all of you, and sorry for the overly flowery language <3
EDIT: we've scheduled a date for tomorrow evening. I'll let people know how it went two days from now in my final (unless something big happens) update.
EDIT 2: at his place presently. Shame me not, reddit.
[FINAL UPDATE] I went on a date with my ex-husband last night
March 5th, 2025
My (35M) ex-husband (36M) and I recently reconnected. I won't go over the details of why we split or our reconciliation since I'm sure the average redditor can click buttons and most likely read. He was the one taking me out, and promised that it would, in his words, "knock my socks off" to make up for his neglect of me. He sure as hell delivered.
A little backstory, we've been together since we were 15 and 16 respectively, and have never moved out of our hometown. This year would have been our 20th anniversary (of getting together, not marriage). We were dating secretly for about five years before our parents caught us one day during summer break. The fallout from finding out their son was gay actually made his parents split. His dad wanted to send him away to conversion therapy. He's seen his father maybe once per year on average, and every time he's incredibly cold towards me. Would never refer to me as his son-in-law, only my husband's "pal." I wonder why. Anyway, not what you're here to read. I'll get on with the lore.
He picked me up from the house and wouldn't tell me where we were going, but told me to dress warmly. He ended up taking me to the place where we met: a run down ice skating rink in our town. He used to do hockey, and I spent some time trying to learn figure skating until people started beating me up for it. Both sports would practice at the same time and I remember barely being able to keep my eyes off him. We went skating, I tried to pull off a few of the moves I remembered (he only had to catch me from falling on my ass once or twice, and I won't complain about an attractive man that I love hooking his arm around my waist), and we spent an hour or so there until our feet hurt. At one point I said that my face was getting cold, so he skated around in front of me and placed his gloved hands on my cheeks to warm me up. I just about burned a hole in the ice from how hard I was blushing, I swear to God.
He wasn't done then. We left and went to dinner, specifically the restaurant where we had our first date. It's a cheap hole-in-the-wall place, seeing as we were poor teenagers when we first met. We chatted and ate food that probably took 5 years off our lives, he was an incorrigible flirt, and even held my hand underneath the table like he did all those years ago. I know I said I never stopped loving him, and I stand by that, but I think I somehow fell in love with him a thousand times over again during that meal.
At the end of dinner, he asked if I had energy for one more simple thing, to which I agreed. He took me a while out of town to a dark sky zone park, specifically the one where he proposed to me ten years ago. He set out a blanket to sit on and another to cuddle under, and we went stargazing all bundled up together. You never know how much you miss the sound of someone's heartbeat until you haven't heard it for so long. We shared a bottle of sparkling grape juice in plastic champagne flutes and dumb, giggly kisses. It felt so similar yet so different. He told me in a moment of quiet that he loved me, and oh, God. It took everything I had not to cry. I barely hesitated before asking if he wanted to change venues. He seemed surprised, but eagerly accepted.
I ended up at his place, as some of you may have seen from my edit on my second post yesterday. I wanted to take it slower than this, but it was so hard to. I was so starved of affection and hadn't been intimate with anyone for just about six years. I'm gonna keep what happened at his between us, but all I'll say is that his medication was no issue and all of you should be jealous. I woke up in his bed this morning, reached over for him, and pulled him close just like I used to do. I haven't been this happy in a long time. We had a sleepy discussion and decided to get back together, but we're not using the term boyfriends. It just feels weird after all this time. So he's my partner, or my lover. He's mine.
Thank you, reddit. Wouldn't have done it without a little push from the internet. Let's see where all this goes.
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I think it's funny how the scrottie mcboogerballs episode of south park made it seem like the writers don't want fans looking too deeply into their show, but also I am physically incapable of analysing everything I like and have sooooo much I want to say. But as of right now what I'm the most curious about is Cartman's mental state because he is clearly mentally ill and probably a sociopath of some kind, and I want to analyze everything he does, which is kind of difficult when sometimes his behavior will do a total 180 simply because it was convenient for whatever episode or situation he's in
#the pyre#like in go god go when he travel a bazillion years into the future and is totally unfazed by the fact that everyone he knew is dead#I don't believe for a second that he would be as unfazed as he was even if he is a sociopath or psychopath#bc even if he doesn't truly love his mom for example#he loves the things she lets him get away with#and he would not be able to survive in a future where he does not have the upper hand#and yeah the athetists treated him like their saviour and he had some leeway with them#but still#there's no way he truly didn't care at all#to me this is ooc#I''m bringing this up bc every so often I think about the drawings he made of like Kyle Butters and a few of the other boys#having sex in his journal#and go completely insane#like there sooo much stuff regarding Cartman's sexuality in south park#prob bc trey is kinda gay so he'd know what it's like#like he clearly thinks about homosexuality a lot and this could be his way of exploring it.... remember cupid me...?
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I could make a serious Wicked review and talk about the vocals and the choreography and the costumes and the sets, which are all great, but this is tumblr, and I know that all of these aspects will not matter nearly as much as me reviewing the movie by how much gay subtext they put into it, so that's exactly what I'm gonna do.
Elphaba and Glinda are either holding hands or have their arms linked for about 70% of this movie. Literally, after they officially become friends these girls are attached at the hip.
'What Is This Feeling?' remains about as gay as it usually is, but I will highlight that they lie awake at night thinking about each other which. I know what you are etc etc
The scene where they dance together is. I have no words. That was beautiful. Both actresses put so much emotion into the sequence. And there's a moment where Glinda puts her hand on Elphaba's face, almost like she's brushing away the tears there, and that shit made me cry as well.
'Popular' is insanely homosexual. There's a scene where they're laying down on the bed looking into each other's eyes, and Glinda shifts to basically be on top of Elphaba. My jaw was on the floor. Just lots of touching and Looks all throughout.
When they go to see the Wizard all that casual touching I mentioned previously is multiplied by tenfold, and there are several moments where Elphaba looks at Glinda for reassurance, which was very sweet.
'Defying Gravity' made me just as emotional as I knew it would. I do wish they had hugged but honestly with all the handholding and the staring into each other's eyes, and Glinda wrapping the cloak around Elphaba, they gave us plenty. Once again the acting caught me by surprise (specially from Ariana), both of them communicate so much with just looks.
Anyway my overall thoughts are, these bitches gay, good for them. They did not tone down the subtext at all (like I know some people were worried would happen), and while they didn't make anything explicit either (which I never expected them to*), I'm confident that both Cynthia and Ariana understood the assignment in regards to the kind of relationship Glinda and Elphaba have in canon, and that was enough for me.
*I will admit that a secret corner of my little lesbian heart hoped beyond hope that they would include the scene from the book where Elphaba canonically kisses Glinda (iirc it's supposed to be during Defying Gravity), but like, I always knew they wouldn't.
#wicked#wicked 2024#wicked movie#gelphie#elphaba x glinda#elphaba thropp#glinda upland#galinda upland#ariana grande#cynthia erivo#lesbian#queer#wlw#lgbt#wicked spoilers#wicked movie spoilers#bis hits
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haven't heard anyone say love is love in a while but it's kinda beautiful to me can we bring that one back into common use please
#love is love#love!!!!!!! love guys#people love each other and its so wonderful#i guess i get it because now that most of us have the right to marriage we don't want that to be up for debate right#but people in some countries don't and it is so sad#and it's also just a wonderful thing to say u know#gay rights#remember when i was just a tot#and i was on the forums and everyone was first learning about homosexuality and j was like#woa i didn't know you could do that#but you can and it was such a nice good introduction to the concept
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