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dennou-translations · 4 years ago

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Violet Evergarden: Booklet 9

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A certain man picked up a wild beast.

It was beautiful to an uncanny extent. Catastrophically foolish. Laughably ignorant and violent.

However, it was also an extremely rare kind of beast, which had attachment for people and obeyed them.

Its fur was golden. Its eyes were a limpid blue.

The beast did not know how to let out a cry, but if trained, it could probably sell for a high price.

Such was the beast that the man had picked.

The man and the beast’s encounter was a result of misfortune, as a great number of people had fallen victim to the beast’s fangs.

The beast followed the man’s back around all the time.

It was a terrifying beast, which devoured humans. He had to hurry and dispose of it somewhere.

Still, the man thought, it would probably be useful in a battlefield.

The man’s occupation was national defense. His status was of naval captain.

A ferocious beast was suitable as a guard dog, and no one would be troubled if the lonely beast lost its life somewhere.

For the man, the beast was not a desired companion, but whatever could be used should be used.

Had he not thrown it away when he was supposed to, the future would have changed drastically.

Violet Evergarden If

“Shirt – not that; the shirt.”

The soft light of dawn shone over Leiden, the capital of Leidenschaftlich. It was a fine season, in which petals of bougainvillea flowers danced about. A beautiful morning. The appearance of the city was divine as sunshine flowed down from the rifts between the clouds, like ladders for the angels. A daylight that caused people to embrace a little bit of hope toward the day called today and the long period called life – that caused such thoughts to appear – was illuminating the city.

On this wonderful day, inside the dormitory of a facility built in the vicinities of Leidenschaftlich’s Ministry of the Navy, a man had fallen into an overcast mood, in contrast with the scenery outside. Although he had woken up a mere few minutes ago, he was irritated. He was not looking at the sunlight coming from the window. Neither did he have any interest in the dancing of the gentle shadows created by the fluttering curtains.

The only thing he had his eyes on was his beast.

“It’s the shirt. You’re not doing that on purpose, are you?”

The man belonged to a privileged class. One could tell that his furnished, private room had been renovated so that its user could live in maximum comfort. Something of the sort was not permitted unless the person was from a social position fitting of it.

He hated the idea of having his own house. He also avoided returning to his home and to a smaller component of his nation, his family.

“‘Shirt’.”

“The shirt. Shirt.”

“‘Shirt’.”

“No, that’s a cufflink. Listen up; I’m gonna say it one more time.”

As he spoke, his voice was low, charming and sullen. His hair, like ink in the color of nightly darkness with a thread of blue mixed in, was long and resembled silk. His deeply carved and delicate facial features would surely be showered with attention from women if he went on a walk in the city. One could tell the fineness of his upbringing with a single glance from his noble beauty.

The man who bore such looks, Dietfried Bougainvillea, was fed up with the girl in front of him, who could not do as much as bring him a shirt. From her appearance, said girl, unshapely clad in the female officer uniform of Leidenschaftlich’s navy, was so young that she had not yet reached her mid-teens. He could be considered much too immature for making an angry face at such a child.

Dietfried grasped her tiny hand, of a size so different from his own, and made her hold onto a white shirt. “Shirt,” he said while glaring at her, as if to give her a lesson. His lips also moved slowly, so that she would understand the pronunciation.

The girl being glared at alternated between looking at the shirt she was made to grab and at her master, who was naked from the waist up. Her big eyes opened even wider as she was attempting to learn something.

Dietfried wanted to start yelling at her immediately, but somehow managed to remain in his current state, accepting her silence and that she took her time.

Eventually, the girl nodded. “‘Shirt’...”

Dietfried exhaled. He let out a breath mixed with both relief and disappointment.

“That’s right; it’s a shirt that I want.”

“This is a shirt.”

“What will you do with that shirt?”

“Captain, it is a shirt.”

“Yeah, that’s right. Just hand it over after you say that. You’re really one handful of a mongrel.”

“A shirt.”

“Enough.”

“Captain, a shirt.”

“Enough already!”

What he was doing was teaching. The girl, who could not even properly say that word, had never had any education. She was an orphan that Dietfried had taken in due to certain circumstances and did not know how to speak very well. Most likely, she was being used by someone else before Dietfried had picked her.

She was definitely a wild beast rather than a person. All she could do was murder people as per her master’s order. She was a bestial girl who was unable to do anything but that. Dietfried had the girl live in one of Leidenschaftlich’s warships, immediately putting her into action for combat should there be any battles at sea, using her as a soldier.

The reason why he was scoring exceptionally good military achievements was that he kept her by his side. As she had the appearance of an infant, she easily incited negligence. She had already displayed her power a number of times by approaching enemy warships on a boat, causing a disturbance by the moment that she was mistaken for a victim and allowed onboard, then taking advantage of it to start a naval attack. It was an inhumane work for a little girl to do.

Dietfried was aware of that. Yet he had made her do it. She had done it countless times.

He had thought she would soon die, but whenever he went to check on the bodies, she was usually the lone survivor. No matter how much he attempted to kill her, to have her killed, she did not die. Instead, she would crush the enemy ships.

“Leidenschaftlich’s Undine” was what the navy soldiers called her now.

If he could not kill her, he had no choice but make her useful. Dietfried despised this girl, who had slaughtered his underlings when they first met, but that time had now passed and was opening up anew. Making use of this girl’s life until she collapsed was also a way to mourn for those who were gone. That was how he thought it over. For that reason, in order to work her hard also as a servant, he was teaching her how to speak.

He had started doing it because of the fact that they had trouble communicating, but Dietfried did not have much talent as an educator. He had been able to climb up to the position of naval captain due to his personal achievements. He was skilled at leading and instructing people, but for lecturing a child like this one-on-one, he was terribly unfit.

“Next, the shoes. Put my shoes on for me.”

“Sho...”

“Here, look at the way my mouth moves.”

“I—am.”

“Shoes. C’mon, try saying it.”

“‘Sho-es’.”

“Say it five times. Shoes, shoes, shoes, shoes, shoes.”

“‘Shoes, shoes, shoes, shoes, shoes’.”

“All right. Now, put my shoes on me.”

“Captain, you mean ‘shoes, shoes, shoes, shoes, shoes’.”

Clearly unfit.

“Captain.”

“You trash.”

“‘Tra-sh’.”

“Hey, don’t say ‘trash’ to me.”

“What does ‘tra-sh’ mean?”

Dietfried felt like crawling onto the bed he was sitting on and lying down to sulk just like that. In fact, he did hang his head and roll onto it.

Anyone who knew him well would evaluate that, for someone like him, he was teaching her very patiently. As he was the kind of man who could do anything flawlessly by nature, his attitude towards those who could not was cold. Such a man was attempting to educate an orphan child who did not know how to talk. He was in a state where one could say that he was making an effort.

“Captain, it is morning.”

“I know... I ain’t sleeping. I’m lying face-down ‘cause I’m disappointed in you.”

“Do you have any orders for ‘You’?”

“Y’know, I do call you ‘You’, but that ain’t your name.”

“If not, ‘You’ will be on stand-by.”

Albeit good at catching on words such as “stand-by” or “order”, she was slow to absorb terms that were used in daily life. The discrepancy between the things she did and did not have interest in was evident in the results of her learning.

This wild beast of a girl actually did not need words.

Even so, Dietfried had decided to grant them to her. Going back on a decision was shameful to him. He believed that he should never do such a thing.

——I gotta at least make her evolve from wild animal to watchdog. Or else, both she and I will be in trouble.

Dietfried was striving. He was exerting himself extraordinarily.

“Enough; I’m gonna comb my hair now. Gimme the comb.”

It seemed she had properly memorized the word “comb”, as she immediately took it from the dresser that the room was already provided with and presented it to Dietfried. She observed him with her big, gemstone-like eyes as he sat up as if it were a pain and slowly began combing his lengthy hair. He smooth and deftly braided it with his long fingers, then tied it with a ribbon and it was over.

Dietfried hit the bed with a slap, directing the girl to sit next to him. “Do as I do. As long as you’re wearing that uniform, you’re my subordinate. You having a bad appearance is a problem for me.”

Accepting the comb, the girl began combing her hair as well. She was improving lately, but her hair was damaged for a while due to malnutrition, so the ends tended to entangle. When she tried to force the comb through, Dietfried apprehended her with a hand.

“This again... Stop; don’t treat your hair like that... Why do I gotta brush it every day? Today’s the day that you’re gonna get it cut,” Dietfried said while carefully unraveling the entangled hair tips in her stead.

The girl was stock-still. Dietfried did not realize that the facial expression on her profile was a little bit different from her usual deadpan.

“Captain.”

“What?”

“Should ‘you’ comb your hair as well?”

“Nah, ‘s fine. I get a bad feeling when you’re behind me.”

Whether she had understood or not, the girl closed her eyes as if holding back on something. “All right...”

In order to both replenish and repair the warship, Dietfried went on land. The stay at the port was scheduled to last up to five days. During that period, the crew would be on vacation. Most of his subordinates were roaming the city of Leiden, but those who lived close to it took full advantage of their days off to go see their families in their hometowns.

Dietfried also finally had free time today. He had to take several days to submit all sorts of greetings and reports. He made a long memo in his head with a list of the things that he had to purchase. One way or another, he was able to make time at least to go shopping in peace.

“Hey, let’s go.”

“Yes, Captain.”

Dietfried generally took action while keeping her by his side. She would be all right standing in waiting somewhere, but thoughtlessly leaving a woman alone amongst men was a primary factor for incidents to occur.

It was not as if he were worried about the girl. The ones he worried about were the people who would find the tables turning against them for attempting to lay their hands on her. In times of war, Dietfried’s decision was to avoid losing human resources as much as possible. He had to supervise this girl in order to prevent her from reducing his number of underlings.

However, there was also a good side to it. The girl’s fighting power and crisis-sensing abilities were outstandingly excellent, which qualified her for escort missions. He used to always walk around with bodyguards and associates as his ranks went up, but now, just this girl was enough.

——It’s nice that I can let more people, even if just one more, rest up by sacrificing her.

Under the light of the sun, Dietfried thought this as he watched the girl eagerly move her legs to chase after his back with tapping footsteps.

“We’re done buying these kinds of luxury items... Now for the clothes... Hey, this way. Follow me.”

“Captain, you are well-acquainted with the city.”

“That’s right. I’m ‘well-acquainted with the city’,” Dietfried gave a reply on the same level to the girl, who sometimes used words in a strange manner.

Just as he told her, Leiden was his hometown. In normal circumstances, it would be all right for him to return home as well.

“Though I don’t know if I like this city or hate it.”

But as he did not do so, one could guess about his family situation.

“You know what the good of this city is, do you?”

“I do not—know the city—very well.”

“The beauty of the architecture and the spirit of the people change depending on the city. If you leave out your emotions, Leiden’s a stunning city.”

“I do not have emotions. That means it is a stunning city to me.”

“You’ve got it wrong.”

“This is difficult.”

“You can’t understand human reasoning ‘cause you’re not human.”

“I see.”

After saying something that would hurt a little girl, he checked on her facial expression, yet it was blank as ever.

“You.”

However, he did not miss that her voice had become slightly gloomier.

“Don’t you wanna run away from me?” he whispered oppressively, stopping in his tracks and looking down at her from above.

Framing her huge eyes, the girl’s golden lashes fluttered like butterflies. She seemed surprised.

“We aren’t at sea right now. Or inside the warship. If you run off somewhere, I won’t be able to catch up. For starters, I’d have no intention to go looking for you. So if you wanna do that, you can.”

If a third party happened to hear the question, it would sound almost as if he were testing the girl. In fact, he might have been. People did such things out of foolishness every once in a while.

Dietfried absolutely did not admit it, but as he took this beast into his personal care and raised her, he began to feel that he wanted something. In return for that, he did not give her a name. If it were someone else, they would surely put it into words and display their desire with ease, but Dietfried was different. This man was awfully complicated – deeply compassionate yet cruel.

“Captain Dietfried, what am I supposed to do—by running away—from you?”

Just like that girl, he was broken somewhere.

The question made no sense to her.

“I have no meaning. If you do not use me, that is.”

This girl had no feelings.

“There is no meaning to me unless I am being used. I am a tool. I exist to be used.”

She did not know love.

“I am a wild beast. Beasts nestle up to where their owners go.”

All she wanted was validation of her own existence. Money, honor, status or anything of the sort.

“I am sure that—I was made this way—ever since I was born.”

She needed none of it. They made no sense to her.

“And you—have been registered—as my master inside me.”

The girl before his eyes looked at him as if to say, “don’t forget that I’m a beast”.

“You bring me along and use me.”

It might be that their positions were inverted from the very beginning.

“Please do stand next to me, Captain.”

Perhaps Dietfried was the one being kept around as a proof of existence.

——It’d be great if I could kill her right now.

She was merely a lonely beast, who just yearned for a master. It did not have to be Dietfried. That was what he felt she had told him.

“I’m going back.”

Dietfried started walking. Towards a direction completely opposed to the set route. In large steps, his leather boots clicking, he strode as if to leave the girl behind.

“But you still—have not bought most of the items.”

“It’s fine; I’m going back.”

“All right.”

As expected, the girl was expressionless even as her master suddenly grew displeased and yelled at her. She was accustomed to being swayed around. Not just by the man in front of her, but by her own fate as well. She had flowed, letting herself go with the current, and was now here.

It was Dietfried alone who never became accustomed to the girl.

“Walk fast.”

There was no appropriate name for the relationship of the two.

“Yes, I shall not leave your side.”

——You scum.

Why did he have to be the only one manifesting his emotions? It would be great if he could make the girl’s face distort even if just a little. This feeling surfaced and disappeared within him. It was almost the way of thinking of a child whose mother would not give him any attention, but trapped as he was in his own emotions, Dietfried did not realize this.

“Captain.”

Disturbed by rage and confusion, Dietfried angrily yelled, “What?!” in response to the girl’s call.

“There is a suspicious person running toward us from behind us. Shall I suppress them?”

“Haah?”

As he turned around, just as the girl had said, there was indeed a strange individual running their way. He had a purse under his arm. They could hear the scream of a woman at the back. If one were to take a conclusion just from looking at the situation, he was most certainly a thief.

“Don’t kill; capture him.”

To the order whispered at her in a low tone, the girl replied with a clear voice, “Understood.”

Immediately, she dashed off.

“Outta the way!”

As the man harshly shouted such aggressive words while coming at the people around him, they would open way for him in fear. The only one who pushed through the opened path was the girl.

“Brat! Move! I’m gonna kill you!”

Seeing a girl clad in a military uniform heading towards him, the man took out a pocketknife as he ran. Running while swinging it around was dangerous to no bounds. No matter how much brute strength one had, they would still waver at such a head-on challenge.

“My name is not ‘Brat’.”

However, the girl did not falter. Right before the collision, the girl lowered her posture with a jerk and evaded the pocketknife’s assault first-thing. She then grabbed one of the man’s legs and hurled herself at him. As the strength that the man had applied to the direction of his move was forcefully stopped, he violently plunged face-first into the ground.

“It is ‘You’.”

The girl’s attack did not end there. She seized the back of the agonized man, and after lifting his body as if picking a cat by its collar, she punched his throat. On top of that, she twisted his arm, completely suppressing his movements.

“P-Ple—ase—let—”

“I cannot understand the contents of your speech.”

“L-Let—g-go—pl—ea—se—”

“I cannot understand the contents of your speech.”

There was a spine-freezing kind of fearsomeness to the girl, who heartlessly repeated the same response to the man that was most likely saying, “Let go”. There was as much beauty to her appearance as there was a spur of coldness in her.

“The lecture I gave you last time about human body vitals came in handy, huh.”

“Yes.”

Dietfried came walking in a relaxed manner, looking like his moody aspect from earlier had decreased by just a little bit.

“As you told me, Captain. Strikes to the throat are effective.”

“True. Remember the name of the spots that hurt when you hit it?”

“‘Vital parts’.”

“That’s right... In men’s case in particular, there’s Adam’s apple. Look at this.” Dietfried grabbed the hair of the pitiful robber and made him raise his face. He then pointed at the other’s Adam’s apple. “Listen up. This bulgy thing is Adam’s apple.”

“‘Adam’s maple’.”

“It’s ‘Adam’s apple’.”

The robber could do nothing but watch the exchange between the two oddballs in confusion. There was no way to describe them other than “bizarre”. It could also be said that they were crazy. After all, the duo was holding a lecture about vital parts using the body of a complete stranger.

“‘Adam’s apple’. Is it... Is it a vital?”

“Yeah. It gets difficult to talk when you strike here, so hit it when you want someone to keep quiet.”

“Understood, Captain. If I want someone to keep quiet, I shall hit them there.”

“Also, you were probably going for his feet ‘cause he has a knife, but when the guy’s used to fighting, you should drop the idea. You’d get kicked like that. You might be strong but you’re light.”

“Should I dodge to the side?”

“With your jumping abilities, you could’ve also fly-kicked him. He had his hands full with the pocketknife and the bag anyway. Most people wouldn’t think you’d fly-kick them, so it can work. Either that or start attacking after throwing the stuff you’re holding at him.”

The girl nodded as if to say, “I see”. “But Captain, I am not allowed to throw your belongings.”

“That’s right. If you’d done that, I would’ve given you a beating.”

Despite making a face that denoted she had not comprehended it, the girl nodded. Those who were used to obeying tended to gulp down the double standards of others.

“Anyhow, should we return the bag to the victim? Or should we report to the military police...”

Although Dietfried was dealing with the fuss in a brisk and business-like manner, his eyes took notice of someone squeezing through the crowd that had gathered around him.

“Please let me pass,” the voice of a man echoed straight throughout the area.

“Sorry; it’s dangerous here, so let us pass,” so did the sweet voice of another man.

“Excuse me; we heard that you have caught a fugitive criminal, and we have as well. Let’s bring them to the military police togeth...”

The men who had showed up lost their voices for a second. As did Dietfried.

“Gil...”

Hair the color of night and emerald eyes. There were parts of their physical appearance that were similar to one another, yet the air about them was overwhelmingly different. However, if the two stood next to each other, one could quickly tell what they were.

“Brother...”

The one standing there was Dietfried’s little brother, Gilbert Bougainvillea.

“Uwah, it’s the Captain.”

Together with a large red-haired man, he had a thief in his hold and they were dragging him away.

——Claudia Hodgins too... Sure ran into a noisy fellow.

The joy of meeting his younger sibling surfaced, yet once he pondered about how to explain the situation and how they would respond to it, his feelings soon leaned to the side of deeming it as a bother.

Gilbert displayed agitation for an instant at the sight of his older brother, but immediately switched his gaze over to understanding the state of the surroundings. When he saw that a girl was the one pinning down the assumed robber all by herself, the look in his eyes changed.

“Hodgins.”

“Aah, it’s okay. I can hold him on my own. You take care of that girl...”

Gilbert handed the man that they had under restraint over to the one named Hodgins, heading to the girl’s side and kneeling down with one knee. He then said, locking his gaze with hers, “Let’s switch; are you hurt?” Before earning her consent, Gilbert took the man’s restraining upon himself. “Any injuries?” he asked again as the girl did not answer.

The girl looked at Dietfried. “Captain is unharmed,” she reported her master’s condition, not thinking that she was being questioned about her own.

“No, I’m asking about you.”

The girl looked at Dietfried, then at Gilbert. She moved her neck left and right countless times, at loss. “Whether I am injured or not is not an issue. That question is inappropriate.”

As Dietfried heard this sentence, the area around his chest suddenly became heavy.

“What are you saying...? This is about your body. Your family would be sad if you were wounded, wouldn’t they?”

After all, he had not never asked her the question “Are you hurt?”.

“I do not have a ‘family’.”

Not even once until now.

Gilbert looked at Dietfried. Dietfried also looked at Gilbert. For a moment, the two brothers rejected what the other wanted to say with their eyes. An air that could be deemed as hazardous started drifting there.

Although Gilbert had been speaking to the girl in a soft tone until just a while ago, the warmth of his voice took a brusque nosedive, “Brother, we should contact the military police first of all.”

“Then, I will call them.”

“That’s fine; you stay here. Brother, you’re the most empty-handed of us. We can count on you, right?”

“I’m holding shopping bags.”

“Brother... I’ll get angry for real...”

Ultimately, Dietfried yielded, out of fear towards his little brother’s wrath. The two thieves were swiftly taken to the military police, and so the three men and one girl who had seized them left the scene as if fleeing from a turmoil.

The course of events after that was, simply put, a spectacular sibling fight.

Gilbert was enraged at his older brother for making a little girl into a combatant and using her as a slave, while Dietfried desperately tried to refute him through the fact that she was not a “girl” to begin with. Stuck between them and unable to endure staying there any longer, Hodgins had attempted to take the girl away from the spot of their argument, yet she would not leave Dietfried’s side. In the end, they did not manage to keep the discussion together, parting ways with the decision to set up a proper place to talk on a later date.

While returning to the dormitory and even after arriving, Dietfried stayed quiet, not uttering a single word. It was already late into the night.

“Captain.”

Silence.

“What will you have for today’s dinner? I can take a seat in the cafeteria for you.”

“Don’t need it.”

“Understood.”

Dietfried’s irritation amplified even further with the fact that the girl, who was the point at issue, was conducting herself by operating in the same manner as usual.

“I don’t wanna look at your face. Go back to your room.”

“Understood.”

Once she left his bedroom, Dietfried had an abrupt realization. The girl would not go to the cafeteria unless he ordered. Since he had forgotten to tell her to do so, there was a possibility that she would not eat.

——I have to tell her.

However, a feeling surged within him, asking why he had to look after her to that extent. Whenever that girl was around, no matter what, he would end up restricting himself.

Rage welled up within Dietfried yet again as he recalled everything that Gilbert had told him.

“Brother, you’re a horrible person.”

——No, it’s not just me. She is, too.

“Don’t you feel sorry for that child?”

——You’re wrong; that’s not it. It’s not like that. You don’t get it.

“She’s still so little.”

——She’s a little murderer. An assassin who killed my comrades and kills my enemies.

Just which of them was the one in captivity?

——Who made a mess out of my life.

Wishing to become free, he had thrown everything away. Even if he were to receive criticism, he had run away from it all, not paying it any mind. That was Dietfried Bougainvillea.

——Even though I was free.

He had thrown away his home.

——Even though I was free.

He had thrown away his family.

——Even though I was free.

He had thrown away his brother.

——Even though I was free.

And then, he threw away even kindness, becoming a blade drawn out of its stealth and surviving in severity. He had been doing his best. Had been suffering.

Still, because of just one girl, everything was unstable now.

Dietfried moved his body with a sudden motion. He stood up from his bed and put on a coat. Opening the door of the room next to his, he made the girl dress up in as many layers as possible and took her outside.

Where were they going in the dead of night? The girl asked what their destination was, yet he did not answer. They walked, walked and walked, then hopped onto a carriage.

The carriage moved with clicks and clacks. The Moon could be seen chasing them all the while from the window.

Once they eventually reached a place much too far from the dormitory facilities, she could see a mansion that one would not call an ordinary home. One could assume that the surrounding plots of plentiful nature were also part of the estate, which was Dietfried’s former residence as well.

The mansion was property of the Bougainvillea family. This was a portion of it. The main house was located somewhere else.

The sky was already beginning to pale, about to welcome the break of dawn. Again, a beautiful morning was going to start in Leidenschaftlich.

They had been traveling for a whole night and his body was aching. His condition was at its worst due to lack of sleep. However, Dietfried let out a relieved breath as they reached the mansion at last. Currently enlisted in the army, Gilbert had told him that he was in Leiden for a temporary stop. If so, in order to avoid an earful from their mother, he should be staying in their villa.

Right now, Gilbert was in there. His little brother, who – unlike Dietfried – had the shape of everything that their parents deemed a person must have, was there.

“Listen up: go inside that house. And then call Gilbert.”

His respectable younger sibling, whose emotions were not overly warped, was there.

“Tell him I kicked you out. If you do that, he’ll treat you right. You gotta show him how tired you are. No matter what, be sure to ask him to make you into an army officer.”

That was a sparkle in Dietfried’s life of complete darkness.

“There’s no way that someone like you could manage living a normal life at this point. Serve the military, and then die.”

The fact that he existed and was a relative with whom Dietfried shared the same blood was, to the latter, hope.

“He’ll protect you for sure.”

He was hope. He was light.

“I...”

No matter how broken he was, Dietfried could believe that he had one normal something. This had always granted him courage.

“You...”

He was aware that he was doing wrong as a person.

“You and I can’t be together.”

He knew he was the kind of human being who could not change, regardless of being in the wrong. That was why he loved his virtuous younger brother as if it were a necessity. He loved him even now.

Gilbert would never betray Dietfried. After all, he also loved his older brother.

The girl’s usual expressionlessness slowly crumbled. She repeatedly opened and closed her mouth, attempting to say something. However, probably unable to find the right words, she looked at the Bougainvillea mansion and shook her head like a child throwing a tantrum in refusal.

“Go; just go.”

“I—do not—want to.”

“Don’t talk back. I don’t need you. Go be used by a different owner.”

“I—do not—want to... I do not want to...”

“I’m telling you I don’t need you! Hurry and go!”

The girl tried to grasp Dietfried’s arm. Yet Dietfried began walking away before she could do so. He just uncaringly headed to the carriage that was parked a little far from the residence’s front gate.

“Captain.”

The girl was coming after him. Her voice was loaded with feelings of desperation.

——What’s up with you?

“Captain, Captain—”

——Even though you usually have no emotions.

“Captain, I do not—want this! Captain! Please give me—an order!”

——Even though you only think of me as a tool to receive orders.

“Captain! Captain! I will—properly learn—how to read!”

——Could’ve been anyone, right? Even if it weren’t me, anyone should do for you.

“Plea—se! Captain—I do not—want this, Captain!”

——Even if it weren’t me, you would...

“Captain... Captain... I will—do anything, Captain... Captain...”

——Even if it weren’t me, you would’ve been okay with it. Isn’t that it?

Dietfried turned around to check if her voice had died down. The same old girl was not there. Her wild beast figure from their first encounter had disappeared as well.

“Please, do not leave me—on my own...”

The one standing there was the infant that Dietfried had taught how to speak.

Dietfried looked at the child in front of him as if he had grown senile. She was crying. That beast of a girl, who did not cry no matter how many wounds she earned, was weeping. And also appealing to him with the things that she could do.

“I can fight; I can also—carry your belongings; and—put your—shirt on—for you.”

She was desperately bringing up what she could do to prove her existence.

“My wounds—heal quickly as well; I can—kill your enemies too; I will do anything.”

How could she assert her being?

“Please let me... Captain...”

What could she do to stay by Dietfried Bougainvillea’s side? She was attempting to certify her existence. In reality, Dietfried had misjudged her.

The girl had properly ascertained who her lord was.

If it could have been anyone else, there were several people other than him. Yet he was the one she had chased after. The wild beast had instinctively sensed and pursued him.

She had followed him while embracing the wish that, if it was a human like him, an adult like him, then surely...

“I can—be used; I can become—an optimal tool.”

...he would not leave her.

Had he not bestowed her with words and used her as a mere tool, she would never have said such a thing. Dietfried had failed.

Combing her hair and patiently teaching her about daily lifestyle had done no good. Neither had the fact that he taught her what to do and how to fight whenever she encountered difficulties while by herself. None of it had done any good.

Even without Dietfried Bougainvillea himself realizing it...

“Please, let me be—by your side.”

...the wild beast was turning into a person.

The complete darkness of the night was gradually fading. From the direction of the Bougainvillea mansion, a servant and Gilbert – the master of the house – appeared, having come upon overhearing the angry yelling. They stared at the duo with surprise.

Dietfried slowly changed his course. He turned to the crying child. One step after another, he moved toward the girl.

“Do you need me?”

He then reached out his hands, holding her small body in his arms.

“Yes.”

With an awkwardness similar to holding an animal for the first time, he supported her from the back.

“Even if I say I don’t need you, do you need me?”

In doing that, the two looked like one.

“Yes; please, do not leave me alone.”

They looked like a single living being, formed through a combination of distorted shapes.

“I see.”

Dietfried felt that the dark things squirming inside his chest until now were clearing up. His feelings for her, which were close to hatred, dimmed away as well. Same for the anger towards himself and his inferiority complex regarding the rest of the world. Illuminated by the gentle sunlight, they all faded and disappeared, just like the deep dark colors of the night.

——I see; so I wanted something like this, Dietfried thought vacantly while embracing the child that clung to him.

He felt like he understood why he was always so irritated at this girl. Just as she wanted to prove herself, he also wanted others to accept him.

Socially, he was acknowledged. He also had subordinates who idolized him. However, Dietfried...

——I wanted this.

...wanted that wild beast to acknowledge. To acknowledge him.

The times when he truly thought that he wanted to kill her had passed. So had the times when he wanted to push her onto someone else. And the times in which he tried to use her solely as a tool until she collapsed, just like a slave, were passing as well. They were now morphing into wondering about what he could do to make her last, to have her live.

They were properly changing towards the direction of the light.

“Then, be by my side.”

That was why he wanted to acknowledge as well. No matter how distorted a shape they had.

The child and man then welcomed the first morning in which they acknowledged each other.

Afterwards, a mansion was erected in the outskirts of Leidenschaftlich.

Built once the Continental War ended, after the cessation of hostilities was finally called on, said mansion was home to a somewhat eccentric family. A man and a girl. Far apart in age, the two of them did not seem to get along well, yet did not show any signs that they would separate from each other.

“Captain, it is morning.”

As threads of golden hair cascaded smoothly in front of him like canopy curtains, Dietfried rubbed his sticky eyelids and opened them. At first, what he could see were exquisite blue eyes and cherry-colored lips. This individual, already clad in a naval uniform, bore features that anyone would call beautiful.

Dietfried regretted unintentionally thinking that she was beautiful first-thing in the morning.

“Captain, it is morning,” her voice echoed softly in his ears.

“Shut up... I know.” He sat up, yawning.

The girl began forcefully undressing Dietfried, whose gestures looked a little childish no matter what he did, without the slightest sign of embarrassment. “You have a dinner meeting today after work. I will not take part in it, but I have arranged a carriage for your return, so please give your name when you go to the assembly hall of the dinner meeting.”

“Got it.”

Letting her do as she pleased, Dietfried was having his clothes changed from sleeping garments to his uniform.

“You stayed up late yesterday night, right? There are dark circles under your eyes.”

“You’re real noisy lately... Most of it is Gil’s influence, ain’t it... You can’t go today ‘cause you got some business with him?” Seeing her movements halt completely when she was buttoning him up, Dietfried snorted. “So easy to read. You into him?”

“No.”

The duo’s conversation was a daily life scene that had happened countless times already. It was by no means anything special.

“Even if you aren’t, I don’t know about him.”

“No, it is nothing of the...”

“You two gonna see each other alone?”

“Mr. Hodgins is also coming.”

“Even if you hook up with him, I ain’t letting go of you. Work for me on commute.”

“Of course.”

“Hn, now comb my hair.”

“Yes.”

“The ribbon will be... navy blue.”

“Yes.”

Dietfried looked at the girl. She had grown up considerably. Back when they had first met, her height was about enough to reach his waist or so.

——But nowadays, she seems to be kinda intimate with Gilbert.

Although she was working flawlessly as his secretary every day, the feeling that she was being conquered lately was undeniable. That was certainly fulfilling for her, but to Dietfried, it was a tad unamusing.

“You say ‘yes’ but you’re gonna throw me away one day, aren’t you?”

A line that did not feel like him accidentally came out, and once it did so, he could not take it back. As Dietfried stayed quiet, the girl tilted her head.

“It is you who are in the position of throwing me away.”

“As if I can do that at this point; you’re mine.”

Silence.

“Aah, I don’t wanna go to work anymore... I feel awful; everything is so annoying...”

“Lord Dietfried.”

“What? You’re so noisy.”

Disgruntled, Dietfried collapsed onto his bed. After staring at him for a moment, the girl eventually imitated it, collapsing onto the bed and coming close to him.

“You gonna sleep too?”

“I am your asset, after all. I live, die, lie down and sleep together with you.”

“So you’ve come to say that.”

She completely had him on the palm of her hand.

Although he had several complaints about it, he also felt comfort from the nature of this relationship already.

Even now, he had never clearly put into words and explicitly stated his feelings towards her.

“One day... you will...”

“I shall serve you forever.”

“You say that, but one day...”

“I shall serve you. For as long as you do abandon me.”

“I said I ain’t gonna throw you away, didn’t I?”

“You tried once.”

“Y’know, that was a one-time flight response from when I was having a hard time rearing a kid. Raising you was a hassle.”

“I am grateful for it. I shall serve you for life.”

Dietfried was no longer his past self. He had become just a man that could not let go of this girl, who was the proof of his existence.

That was why Dietfried reached out his hand. As if to rule over her; as if to make her not forget about him, her lord.

He called her name, which he himself had chosen, “■■■■”

Having her cheek caressed and her name called, the girl crinkled her eyes a little. “Yes, I am by your side.”

That was a story in which the future would have changed drastically, had he not thrown her away when he was supposed to.

#violet evergarden #veedit #fyeahvioletevergarden #kyoto animation #kyoani #dietfried bougainvillea #gilbert bougainvillea #claudia hogdins #violet evergarden booklets #violet evergarden if #novel #akatsuki kana #takase akiko #my translation

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swimfuel · 4 years ago

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Hey!! The X-men are literally my favorite thing and I was wondering if you could elaborate on how Scott is a knight of doom

YES OF COURSE!!!! i'll put it under a cut since i tend to ramble a bit & i'm pulling a bunch of explanations from people smarter than i am

the knight weaponizes their aspect; they have an inherent understanding of their aspect that allows them to exploit it completely. doom is the aspect of systems, restrictions/limitations, sacrifices, and endings.

one of scott's core themes is reclaiming his restrictions in order to serve others/the greater good! he takes the possible liability that are his faulty powers and shifts them to become an advantage, largely through the strength of his restraint and discipline. his role as a tactician and the way he sees sacrifices (more on that later) also mesh EXTREMELY well with the knight of doom.

i feel like the Wh*don run (specifically astonishing x-men #22-23) really highlights how scott can turn a situation on its head through exploiting his disadvantages to the point where they become tactically advantageous!! like, let's count the ways:

the ship the x-men stole from kruun is obviously bugged, so his team won't be able to communicate without being overheard. he realizes this, and uses that restriction (being overheard) as an advantage, by falsifying their course of action.

he has been left "without his powers"—he presents a restriction that lowers the guard of his adversary and grants him entry to their home base. he then subverts this by exploding the shit out of everything when an opportune moment arrives

HE LITERALLY EXPLOITS DEATH...... HE EXPLOITS HIS OWN DEATH...................FOR THE GREATER GOOD..........DUDE???? someone get this man an advil

some more thoughts, followed by some examples by people smarter than me:

he exhibits a similar pattern of idolization/realization with xavier irt karkat/HICand dave/bro.... not sure if this by itself is a knight-y thing but i think the consistent disillusionment with their role in defending their aspect is interesting (aka knight burnout, more on that later)

he is def willing to sacrifice shit for the greater good of mutantkind. the shit in question sometimes being his closest friends and allies. the examples that stick out to me are how he allowed beast to get tortured (utopia era) while executing his plan to solve All His Problems At Once & also when he sent x-force to the future to defend hope knowing it was going to be a one-way trip

that entire issue revolving around just how GOOD scott is at self-repression😭😭😭 i'm pretty sure it's post-schism utopia era i don't remember the exact issue WAIT NVM i'm pretty sure it's uncanny #518

seeing phoenix!scott as an inversion to (rogue of) life is also an interesting concept (unchecked growth!)

the amount of responsibility he feels he has to take on (partially due to his idolization cycle w xavier/xavier's dream) is also both knight-y and doom-y

and of course the instinct to protect the people around him --> being expanded into the whole of mutantkind (which, in turn, expands his sense of obligation)

everything leading up to revolutionary cyclops is also very interesting through this framework because its reminiscent of the knights & doom players in hs! the "taking on an insane burden" (phoenix force, whatever whammied mituna) -> the "resignation to the fate handed to him by his aspect" (his stint in prison, dead daves, sollux in general) -> the "refusal to accept that fate" (prison break, dave not wanting to use time travel, sollux fucking off into the dreambubbles, karkat coming to terms w his relationship w leadership) --> experiencing knight burnout at the end of revolutionary era going into death of x

im not sure exactly how to put it into words but everything about his childhood/teenhood... like being surrounded by forces seeking to control him and use him for their own ends..... idk

(from @/land-of-classpects-and-analysis, sections highlighted red are of particular interest)

HIS GIANT STINKING MARTYR COMPLEX.....DUDE😭😭

side note & ive mentioned this before but scottjean is an interesting parallel to davejade in a way i cant verbalize

Then there are the ones who may accept [the fact of inevitable human suffering], and so choose to live in high alert of any danger - any threats - as well as living in fear of what harm may befall them and/or their loved ones. It is this third and final group of people that so deeply marks that of the Knight of Doom.

Now, this might cause a few eyebrows to become quirked. After all, a Knight? Being fearful of something - nevertheless that thing being related to their Aspect? Knights do often present themselves as ruthless and fearless warriors, yes, but that is only because their Aspects and the world around them raised and called them to act as such.

... A key factor in the Knight’s life, specifically before their journey truly begins, is that they are already well equipped with their Aspect.

... The Knight of Doom is one where their Aspect being all around them is far more bittersweet than anything else.

... What is important to acknowledge is that the facade the Knight of Doom puts up is not only to hide the fear they have for their Aspect, but it is most definitely there to hide the grief and pain they have not yet completely finished going through. Whether it’s been weeks or years, the Knight of Doom is someone who would rather hide themself away from these feelings than find a way to truly mend and heal them ... they have built a false wall between them and their suffering strong and thick enough to partially block it from their memory.

... Knights are known to become extremely stubborn whenever people try to order them around and pressure them into doing something, and the Knight of Doom is no different - especially if they believe what they are doing is for the greater good.

(from @/dahniwitchoflight)

Dahni’s Explanantion: “Doom can be a negative force that rejects and harms, fostering a sense of hostility or sadness. But, it is also the idea that you can pull backwards and cautiously and wisely withdraw into your own self. It can be the idea of Control taken from the sharp Black and White Restrictions that everything in the world gets sorted into. It understands community necessity and need, responsibly pulling back and lowering you down into its lap to help wind yourself down. Doom then is an ultimate gentle Equalizer, instilling its players with an internal sense of Acceptance and eventually true Wisdom.”

Knight of Doom: One who Exploits with Doom or Exploits Doom

Knights hide a fear of a perceived fundamental failure with their Aspect behind a shield of confidence and obsessive effort. Their challenge is to learn to take it down a notch and to understand that they are skilled enough

A Knight is very skilled with using the rules and limitations of any game or session to their advantage. They skillfully fulfill any responsibility or obligation required of them with ease. They might use their natural caution and pessimism to make realistic choices and endeavors. They use and exploit any rule or limit that they can to their advantage. They might also be very good at exploiting any sacrifices made or any obligation or responsibility that they are held to. They might be very good at avoiding any unnecessary thing or person and are very good at recognizing when something is too futile to even bother with.

Likewise they might only focus on the necessary things in their game or session so they are likely to not do much unless it’s absolutely necessary. They would very likely be very meticulous with themselves about following the rules properly and constantly restrict themselves, maybe thinking they aren’t following the rules properly enough or not following the right ones. They might sacrifice anything they consider unnecessary about themselves or the way they live, sometimes even going too far with it, in order to be considered or thought of as less useless. They’re always trying harder and holding themselves to extreme self-imposed standards.

They would likely wait for the opportune moment to strike, though they are slow to move or act, they always will when something necessary needs to happen. Out of all the Doom players, a Knight of Doom seems like the one most likely to sacrifice themselves for the greater good. A Knight of Doom can also expertly use and exploit fire, bombs and explosions to their advantage, maybe they create flashy distractions during fights. They might even use decaying or dying things to their advantage.

(from @/communistvriska)

Role in the Session: Rather like the Prince of Doom, this role’s title kinda has “edgelord” written all over it, but that’s not a set-in-stone character trait. The first thing that comes to mind re: what the Knight Class and the Aspect of Doom have in common is a strong sense of obligation. The Knight of Doom is bound to take their duties and responsibilities Extremely Seriously, perhaps rather too seriously at first ... Knights also tend to be very protective of both their Aspect as a concept, and of themselves and those close to them; while the Knight of Doom isn’t likely to be outwardly aggressive, given Doom’s reserved, slow-burn tendencies, woe betide those who try to deceive or confound the Knight or their allies. One of Doom’s internal contradictions (which I find personally fascinating) is that the aspect is associated both with cynical resignation and with a profound albeit restrained sense of passion and persistence. Doom is what’s left after everything else gets burnt away.

The Knight of Doom will likely be a very skilled combatant, as the Knight is a class strongly associated with Strife / battle, and Doom is one of the more overtly destructive Aspects. I’d put them in the Top 5 Roles to use a cool flamin sword, at least. They’re not going to be eager to fight, per se, but they’re not going to have much trouble scaling the echeladder when it comes to that either. Internally, they’re likely to struggle with a perceived (but largely imagined) inability to fulfill their duties, and they could well stumble once or twice in their quest to be perceived as reliable and stoic, or as someone who their friends can lean on. They’re probably doing more than enough already, but if they’re not careful they might overexert themselves and take on too heavy a burden, and they’re liable to be crushed by their own expectation that they face their challenges alone. This is going to factor into their capital-Q Quest and the environment of their planet, and will be the biggest obstacle in their path to Ascension. A Knight’s duty is to protect their co-players, but their co-players also have to support them.

#mail #scott summers

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bestworstcase · 3 years ago

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#19, #22, #11, and #5 👀

5. Has fandom ever ruined a pairing for you?

🥴

if i really truly ship a pairing nothing and nobody can change my mind because--as discussed in the last post--that’s about the story or stories in my brain and my investment is deeply connected to my storytelling and has Fuck All to do with whatever’s going on in the wider fandom.

but if i’m ambivalent or indifferent or lukewarm on a pairing it’s real easy for a fandom to turn me off it simply because i don’t enjoy how shipping culture tends to reduce characters down to half of a ship dynamic or a set of ship-adjacent tropes that are so broad that they’ve lost any trace of real personality--which when it happens to characters i like is obnoxious in the extreme. this is exactly what happened with cassunzel, and it happens constantly when a character i’m very invested in happens to belong to a popular pairing.

(for clarity’s sake; the issue is generally not individual shippers but rather the widely accepted fanon that develops out of a conglomeration of fic / meta / discussion by many shippers over time. when i joined the fandom the “cass is a socially maladjusted pathetic weirdo with no friends whose only personality traits are not talking about her feelings and loving rapunzel” vibe was not the ubiquitous fanon in cassunzel circles that it is now; the seeds were there but the collective flanderization and woobifying didn’t hit critical mass until after the show ended. it’s a volume problem, not an individual one.)

11. Is there an unpopular character you like that the fandom doesn’t? Why?

*stares at pfp* w. well

i just– i just think she’s neat 😭

zhan tiri is sort of an interesting case because she was introduced initially as this mythological figure and while there were always clear signals that she was going to shape up to be the big bad we knew virtually nothing about her until s3 started airing and i, being me, of course took all of those delicious little inklings and slammed them together into a whole beast of a character who bears literally almost zero resemblance to the character we ended up getting so i am now in the weird position of being a fan of canon zhan tiri and also a fan of bitter snow zhan tiri and also a fan of strings zhan tiri and also a fan of destinies fulfilled zhan tiri and also diadem au zhan tiri who Deserved Better and also BISA zhan tiri who presently only exists in my head; i think ultimately what all this comes down to is zhan tiri is, in the text, a manipulator archetype with a neat, eclectic aesthetic and a story inextricably linked to cassandra’s, and aside from that--thanks to her nature as a slapdash plot device to paper over developmental changes to the plot--a completely blank slate, which means she is MINE NOW.

19. What is the one thing you hate most about your fandom?

i literally cannot write a post analyzing about a character’s flaws--literally any character, just, having flaws at all--without some fucker rb’ing it and tagging it “salt.” what the hell is wrong with you people

22. Popular character you hate?

hffhdjshs does Popular Fanon Varian count

Popular Fanon Varian is like if you took Canon Varian and sucked out everything that makes him a lively memorable compelling character until nothing remained but the desiccated husk of Generic Sad Nerd Boy and then gave him a light patina of stephen moffat sherlock holmes and made him think and talk like the person who writes the salt marathon. why would you do this to a character

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more-than-a-princess · 3 years ago

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@awesomeuchuu asked: Do you feel awkward/nervous/etc trying to get to know people? What is something you want people to know right away about yourself? What are some things you worry about in terms of new people?

Anxious Munday meme - accepting!

Do you feel awkward/nervous/etc trying to get to know people?

Not usually? Admittedly, I do tend to wait for people who followed me first to reach out after I follow back. Mostly because I can’t often tell if someone just wants to read my posts, even as a fellow RP blog, or wants to interact. And I’ve dealt with quite a bit of the former, leading to muns taking offense that I want to interact with their muses when they followed me first.

The most awkward situations are trying to plot and the other mun replying with “Whatever you want to do is fine!” or not wanting to plot at all. Or being forced into a ship or verse without even asking me: I see this often with the Chiaki Nanami/Sonia Nevermind ship (which I ship platonically but not romantically) or forcing me to interact, through dashcomm or asks, in my Despair!verse (this verse is very rarely used on this blog, and never for a first interaction. Mostly because it’s a ton of trigger warnings and I prefer not having to tone down my content because of it).

What is something you want people to know right away about yourself?

The three biggest things: I write a lot, I’m (usually) slow at replies, and I sometimes just feel certain threads/verses/interactions more than others, and that’s not your fault.

I put it in my pinned and my rules, but overall I’m a multi-para to novella roleplayer. While you will likely see one liners and short para replies on this blog, they’re usually crack and reserved for muns and muses I’ve got character development and many past interactions with. They’re fun for a break or as a throwaway or crack thread, but that’s not the bulk of this blog, and most of the time I do prefer longer threads.

I also am slow at replies, especially if you’re used to getting thread replies in 24-48 hours or less. My current turnaround time is 14 days or less, which I’m mostly able to stick to at the moment. This is due to the longer thread style and the fact I’ve got a full-time job, several other hobbies, and am trying to move into my new house at present (I’m currently in the hell that is the packing stage. Thinking about the amount of zeroes I’ll be writing on my downpayment wire is...humbling). I’m hoping by the end of April, my queue will be able to post at 2x/day again instead of 1x/day, which is easier for me to handle right now.

And finally, there’s some character dynamics/verses/interactions I tend to have more muse for overall. In some instances it’s new and fresh, in others it’s a familiar rapport. But most of the time, I just have more ideas for those interactions and will reply and queue them a bit faster. It’s not a slight against my partner as a person, it’s just where my inspiration goes and good writing chemistry. While muses have ship chemistry, I fully believe different roleplay writers have writing chemistry of their own: different writing styles, plots, and interests may inspire some muns while repelling others. And that’s just fine!

In general, I do try to have one active thread with everyone who wants to write. But I don’t always have muse for more. It happens.

What are some things you worry about in terms of new people?

I used to have a lot more worries, like writing style and if we had a bunch of mutuals in common, would they write with me too.

Now, it’s mostly boiled down to one of these two issues (beyond the usual incompatible writing style/forceship/uncomfortable content/etc):

1. You’re writing a canon muse and I have no idea who they are (And I don’t know a lot of canon anime and game muses. Especially video/computer game muses. Unless you write from Danganronpa, The Nonnary Games, an otome title, and possibly Persona 5, assume I likely don’t know who your video game muse is). This happens quite a lot actually, but the problem I run into is that the mun in question either doesn’t want to plot or discuss any sort of interaction so we can figure out a verse/common ground that works for us, or they just don’t have any rules or character info available at all.

It gets really uncomfortable when said muns get offended that I don’t know who their super popular muse is and refuse to make a rules or about page, either.

To that end, it can be easier sometimes to approach fandomless OCs in that retrospect: many OCs I’ve come across do have fandom-specific verses, but also more general verses that I can usually work with. Unless it’s a magic/high fantasy verse, or something with a lot of combat/fighting scenes. Those are my least favorite things to write.

2. You’re posting starter/meme/interaction calls and getting many (a dozen, two dozen, sometimes more!) replies and then post how difficult it is to keep up with them. There’s nothing wrong with that! It just shows a lot of people like to write and interact with you. However, I’m a bit wary of blogs like this because I feel that I only add to their stress and our thread(s) won’t go anywhere because you have a lot on your plate. I may try to wait to interact with you when you have fewer interactions, or at least don’t sound overwhelmed by all of your replies and threads.

#more-than-a-princess answered #more-than-a-princess musings #awesomeuchuu #(Anxious munday meme)#(Thanks for these!)

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thejustmaiden · 5 years ago

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Jaken = Rin's Dad?

Okay, is this how a daughter treats their so-called father?

Most definitely not.

Rin and Jaken's relationship clearly screams of your typical sibling rivalry punctuated with cute and silly moments of playful bickering.

Yes, Jaken may technically be her main provider, but that doesn't necessarily equate to him being more of a father than Sesshomaru. If anything, he demonstrates more of a brotherly love towards her. As we all know, parents (which Sesshomaru embodies more based on real life patterns and parallels) will leave their older more capable children in charge of looking after their younger brothers and sisters. In this case, that would mean making Jaken responsible for watching over Rin and protecting her if need be. Ah-Un offers protection, too. Think of it as Jaken as the big brother and Ah-Un as the family dog who are babysitting while Sesshomaru as the parent of the household is away at work or taking care of business. I mean, they literally fit that description to a tee and I'm dying at the accuracy of it all! 🤣👌

[Quick! Someone write up a modern au where Sesshomaru finally gets out to have a nice date night but everything goes wrong in the most spectacular way. Like maybe Rin and Jaken catch a ride on Ah-Un to go spy!]

I recently revisited some episodes from The Final Act, and I couldn't believe how many moments like this there were where Rin got after Jaken or when she would "put him in his place" so to speak. Obviously, all of it is mostly harmless. I was only surprised by how often it occurred, not to mention how Jaken would just stand there and take it. Towards a supposed father figure, Rin's behavior is downright unacceptable. There's a certain level of respect a child is expected to show their parents/guardians, and that's just not what I'm witnessing here between them. Like at all.

Rather their dynamic has the nature of some sibling relationships like I mentioned above. So I really wish fans would stop pretending otherwise, because based on what we know of father-daughter relationships- healthy ones at least- they don't appear anything like what Jaken and Rin have. If you could please provide me other examples of where we've seen similar portrayals in fiction or in real life, then perhaps I can get on board.

Look, that doesn't have to mean that because Jaken isn't her father then Sesshomaru must be. They can both be her caretakers without necessarily filling that traditional father role. I'm just saying that if we're going to start assigning titles to characters, let's make sure we are accurate and truthful in our assessments. If you're going to label anyone Rin's dad, then it needs to be Sesshomaru. Jaken doesn't have precedence over him in terms of fatherly attributes, that just wouldn't make sense.

After all, this isn't about what you want to see, this is about what Rin very likely sees. It's safe to assume that she views Sesshomaru more like a father than she does Jaken. She knows she's safe with him (broadly speaking lol) and that he'll come for her no matter what. That sense of security and comfort is what a child seeks and what they should always feel in a parent's presence. She trusts and even idolizes him, just as a young and innocent child tends to do with their parents. At that age, parents are perfect and could do no wrong in their child's eyes. Idk about you, but this describes perfectly how Rin is around Sesshomaru.

Rin adores him and will follow him anywhere- yes, even into danger! That's what the innocence and unconditional love of a child will bring them to do if necessary. Fortunately, at the end of The Final Act we learn Sesshomaru takes Kaede's advice when he realizes that leaving Rin with her in the village is in her best interests. That way she'd be able to lead a more normal and safer life alongside other humans. Remember, Sessrin shippers, that doesn't mean he wasn't still a part of her life and didn't witness her become a young woman over the years right before his very eyes. Therefore, if they eventually do become romantically involved, then most if not all of those gifts had intimate and seductive intentions and it essentially constitutes as child grooming.

I understand from a Sessrin shipper's point of view why it'd be so much easier to claim Jaken as the father. In doing so, they diminish Sesshomaru's role in her upbringing. By refusing to acknowledge the real role he had in helping raise Rin (short periods can be crucial and impressionable too esp. in a child's early years so yes they did assist in raising her not only Kaede), these shippers are better able to justify how their filial-like relationship evolved into a romantic one. So yeah, I get it, if I were a Sessrin shipper I'd probably do the same. It's one of the more plausible arguments available to them, after all. "Let's pin Jaken as the father to fend off antis!" is the best chance they've got, but even so, it's still not good enough. But if you insist Jaken is indeed like a father to Rin, then Sesshomaru is most certainly one too. Who says she can't have two fathers anyway?

The thing is however much you want to deny or downplay what Sesshomaru truly means to Rin and vice versa, nothing will ever change or hide the truth of the matter. Please, stop acting like they're only traveling companions and nothing more. Some of y'all even go so far as to say that they're like strangers. Knowing potentially little about a person is not equal to a lack of love and affection. Making big assumptions such as this to defend your ship is actually doing you more harm than good. Let me elaborate.

According to your reasoning, if that's all Rin ever was to him was a companion and Sesshomaru had no real attachment to her, then what precisely is the basis of your ship? Recall that Adult!Rin doesn't exist yet, thus we have no real idea what she will be like or if she's even alive. So how can you make comments like that but then go on later to say "they have such a unique and unbreakable bond" or "only Rin can be the mother because she's the only human he ever cared for" if all that time spent traveling together didn't amount to much in the first place like you claimed to believe beforehand? Do you see how your rationalizing is confusing?

Contrary to what some of you may think, I'm not just saying all this because I'm an anti and I'm obligated to disagree with you, or whatever other excuse you want to tell yourself. Believe it or not, I'm attempting to give as unbiased and objective of an analysis I can based on widely accepted interpretations of family dynamics, development, and any history we know of.

Of course I respect that at times fans will perceive things differently since that's bound to happen. What's hard for me to wrap my head around however is the unwillingness of some fans- not exclusively Sessrin shippers- to apply basic common sense and sound judgment to their observations and deductions.

Looking at all our facts, then taking the small handful of scenes Sesshomaru and Rin do share together into account, one can logically conclude that their dynamic is akin to one found in a typical parent-child relationship. If you still fail to recognize Sesshomaru as a parent to Rin, then that's fine too. In the end, that won't really change the fact that he'd still take on a role resembling an adult figure overseeing a young child's care and protection. Be it as a vassal, guardian, what have you. Plus, nobody is saying here that Sesshomaru doesn't make mistakes regarding Rin's general well-being, but so do all parents. Overall, I think the majority of us agree that Rin is in good hands. Whether it's in his direct company or in his occasional supervision from his frequent visits to the village.

In other words, it doesn't really matter what exact title you assign him in relation to Rin, as the distribution of power is all inherently the same with any and all adult-child relationships. That bond never changes once you've established it either, seeing as it's a special kind of connection one can only form with a child and a child alone.

I was a teacher for a few years, and speaking from personal experience, you don't need to be a parent, per se, to take on a role of authority in a child's life. I know without a doubt that I could never and will never view any of those kids I taught in a sexual/romantic light later down the road; yes, not even once they become grown-ups who are independent and more than capable of making their own decisions. Those of you who disagree are usually missing the whole point though, because we're not trying to dictate what Adult!Rin can and cannot do like many tend to accuse of us doing. This isn't a question of taking away from her autonomy nor does it fall under "purity culture," which is why people shouldn't continue jumping to these outrageous conclusions and really listen for a change. You're deflecting from the real issue here when you choose to misinterpret what we're saying by ignoring the problem we're actually referring to. You cannot present a valid counter-argument if you persist in twisting our words.

Bottom line: once these kids become old enough to pursue a sexual/romantic relationship, of course they have that right if they're ready. All we're trying to say is you guys ought to stop pushing forward this it's-completely-normal-to-want-to-bang-your-adoptive-dad-since-you're-an-adult-and-can-do-as-you-please agenda and not expect backlash. Ship it if you want, but please stop acting like their romance would be the epitome of a pure and healthy relationship.

Sesshomaru may not wear his heart on his sleeve, but it's foolish to presume he didn't actually care about Rin during their whole time together just because he didn't openly express his feelings until the very end. Surely everybody can comprehend that people handle and process their emotions differently. The way Sesshomaru chooses to is completely valid for the most part, so let's cut him some slack regarding this already.

What I'm trying to get at is that any child whose life you played an influential role in will always be a kid in a lot ways to you even when they're old and wrinkly. Just as they will always picture you as the loved one who guided and protected them when they were most vulnerable and couldn't always fend for themselves. Can't we relate this to children we know personally and apply it accordingly?

Finally, I want to end on this note. Could you kindly take a look at these two images below for a second?

The reason I ask is because of something I recently read that's relevant to the topic. There was this pro-sessrin tweet I saw that stated Rin trying to take care of Sesshomaru when they first met is what a mom would do for a child, which in their opinion, translates to Rin being more like a mother than a daughter if anything.

First off: are you freaking kidding me????

Seriously, so now children aren't allowed to tend to their sick or injured parents?! Parents are apparently superhuman and shouldn't be offered a helping hand from a child, even if they mean well and want to help their parent who's in pain?? Now this Twitter user was mostly being a smartass, but at the same time, it was evident they genuinely thought they offered a valid enough point that warranted no further explanation or clarification.

Secondly, by saying this Sessrin fans don't seem to realize that in actuality they're contradicting themselves and proving the point we've been trying to make all along. Glancing at the first picture and moving down to the second, the role of the one being cared for and the caretaker is reversed. So then by their own logic, Sesshomaru IS in fact like a father to Rin.

What it comes down to is the names you give to the roles these characters play aren't as crucial as the dynamic they share. The specific characteristics of that dynamic are what define the importance of said role, not so much the name in the role itself. So real father or not, Sesshomaru and Rin clearly mean a lot to each other. Close relationships are defined and solidified by the devotion and belonging they have to one another, not solely by the duration of time spent together and their proximity.

Well, that's a wrap! I hope you guys got something outta this blog, and that you enjoyed or found some portions of it interesting. I would love to hear your thoughts on the subject from this fandom, but only engage in conversation if you plan to be respectful. Thank you!

#inuyasha #hanyo no yashahime #sesshomaru #rin #jaken #anti sessrin #child grooming #family dynamics #parent child relationship

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thinkingisadangerouspastime · 5 years ago

Note

What your opinion on the Agni Kai was better then aang’s fight with ozai

I want to first say that “better” is a completely subjective statement. Both the final Agni Kai and Aang’s battle with Ozai have huge importance thematically, but are also demonstrative of different aspects of A:tLA, so comparing them in an attempt to determine the “better” battle is really an injustice to the show imo. That said, the final Agni Kai is certainly the more popular of the two big battles, and honestly I can break down its popularity into three main points. People tend to favor the final Agni Kai because:

They see the final Agni Kai as the reason Z.utara should have been canon (no, this is not the same as seeing the battle as crucial to Z.utara’s development; I mean they full-on think that the final Agni Kai matters largely if not entirely because of the brief ‘Z.utara’ moment.)

They recognize the significance of the Agni Kai being framed as a tragedy (specifically regarding Azula).

Their lack of understanding regarding Aang’s arc (or, to be kinder, their personal disinterest in Aang) prevents them from fully appreciating his battle with Ozai.

There are a few other reasons the final Agni Kai tends to be favored (e.g. it’s a much faster-paced battle action-wise; Aang’s battle with Ozai is over twice as long and because of how the show was structured is broken up into several sections and thus feels even longer), but I think those are the main three. So let’s take them one at a time!

First, I have to start with the obvious:

People favor the final Agni Kai because they interpret it as their holy grail of why Z.utara should have been canon.

Firstly, I am not getting into the K@taang vs Z.utara ship wars. I don’t have the time or the energy lmao. But there is a huge difference between shipping Z.utara based on the content provided in the show (because y’all know I love me some Zut@raang) compared to somehow thinking that Zuko and Katara were both ready to be and should have gotten together at the end of the series. In short, Z.utara would not have worked in canon based on where the series stood by the finale, and that’s okay! That fact does not negate the appeal of Z.utara nor does it mean Z.utara shippers should not be allowed to interpret the final Agni Kai as involving Z.utara content (they absolutely can and should! we love to see that!). But the final Agni Kai was not some secret sign that Z.utara was meant to be canon, and people who interpret it as such are sorely missing the point of the battle.

Here are a few metas discussing the final Agni Kai in regards to Z.utara’s importance within canon A:tLA, if you’d like to read some analysis going more in-depth than I intend to. My thoughts regarding Z.utara and the final Agni Kai are pretty simple:

Zuko catching/attempting to redirect the lightning aimed at Katara was not because he was in love with her. For him to sacrifice himself because he was “in love with her” would entirely undermine his redemption arc, which is learning to earn forgiveness and accept unconditional love from his family (both Iroh and the Gaang), not because of romantic interest. (Again, this does not mean someone shouldn’t ship Z.utara; if that’s what you’re taking away from this post, then you might as well stop reading, because I assure you that’s not even close to the point here.)

Katara is set up as Azula’s primary foil (e.g. by and large her relationship in canon with Zuko is aimed as a surrogate sibling); her saving Zuko parallels Azula’s attempts on his life (though her most important moment as Azula’s foil is arguably bringing Aang back to life after Azula kills him, but that’s a subject for another time lol), and Zuko catching the lightning for Katara demonstrates him saving the sister he can save versus Azula, the sister he cannot save (hence her breakdown at the end of the battle while Katara walks away largely unharmed; Zuko’s decision is also a direct parallel to him siding with Azula in “Crossroads of Destiny”, having first chosen the sister who harms him over Katara, the sister who ultimately heals him).

The significance of Zuko catching/attempting to redirect the lightning aimed at Katara is not because it was Katara he was saving; the viewer sees Zuko’s decision and recognizes that he would have done so for anyone. Anyone in the Gaang, plus Mai and Iroh, and possibly even Ty Lee (hell, he’d probably have taken the bolt for Appa and Momo). Zuko’s redemption arc is sealed by his selflessness, his willingness to sacrifice himself for the sake of someone else. While the moment is especially powerful because of Katara’s position as a foil to Azula, it is not the Z.utara holy grail I’ve seen it portrayed to be.

To be honest, the interpretation of the Agni Kai as some big Z.utara moment is both superficial and a massive disservice to Azula and the completion of her arc, which is the focal point of most if not all of the battle, and also entirely undermines the power of Zuko’s redemption (as I discussed). So moving on to the next point!

People favor the final Agni Kai because they recognize its importance to Azula and how the key element of the battle’s emotional weight is its framing as a tragic, heartbreaking moment.

I rewatched both the final Agni Kai and Aang’s battle with Ozai before I wrote this, and I had to try so hard to not cry at the end when Azula breaks down, sobbing openly for the first time in the entire series. It is a powerful, devastating moment, and it is so heartbreaking because of how fitting it is for her. Does she deserve redemption? Absolutely. But in the context of the series and how A:tLA played out, rock bottom is where Azula needs to be, and the audience recognizing that fact is what makes the scene so painful to watch (and also why you can’t take your eyes off the screen). For me, the power of the Agni Kai never came from Zuko’s sacrifice (although I understand why that part resonates with some people more); instead, it was always about Azula’s downfall, her descent, the straw the broke the camel’s back - whatever you want to call it. I’ll try to keep the essence of my feelings towards Azula and the Agni Kai and why this battle is preferred short:

Azula is a much more established antagonist than Ozai. We know from the beginning the Fire Lord is the big bad, but his presence in the show is relegated largely to flashbacks and to the second half of the final season. Azula is introduced in Book Two (technically she appears twice, I believe, in Book One, but she has no lines so I’m not counting those moments lol) and becomes the key antagonist throughout the final two books. The viewers admire her intelligence and strategic capabilities, appreciate her wit and ability to turn a person’s words around on them, and even feel sympathy and pity for her when her difficult relationship with her mother is revealed (in “The Beach”) and when Ozai’s conditional love is demonstrated to apply to her, too (“Sozin’s Comet Part 1: The Phoenix King”). Thus, the final Agni Kai has multitudes more emotional potency in terms of the antagonist, as Azula is more pitiable and developed than Ozai, so it’s understandable that feeling a greater connection to Azula might result in someone preferring the final Agni Kai over Aang’s battle with Ozai. (That said, I will be discussing more about the significance of Ozai as a character later.)

The tone of the Agni Kai is that of tragedy (verus the more action/intense battle of Aang vs Ozai). While the debate of drama vs action is largely related to personal preference, I think it’s worth noting that no other battle in A:tLA (that I can think of) has the slow, drawn-out, orchestral music that is present in the final Agni Kai. The viewers realize this battle may be about power on the surface, but in reality it is a painful, devastating moment about a family irreparably torn apart (at least in terms of the series run). For me, that has always been the captivating factor of the Agni Kai. The viewers mourn for Azula, who has lost herself. Yes, she did so partially in her quest for power, but more importantly in her search for love, as she did not have a support system in her life like her brother (Zuko always had Iroh), and the audience grieves for her. Her mother both feared her and was disgusted by her; her father loved no one (including her) and only valued her for what she could provide to him; she hurt her brother and her best friends to the point where they were forced to turn away from her; and her uncle, as far as what is shown, never extended a hand to her. Azula is a victim of abuse (though this does not excuse any of her actions; in fact, her role in A:tLA as a victim who was abandoned and lashes out before breaking down on the inside is just as important as Zuko’s role as a victim who was given support and was able to heal). Thus, to me, the power of the final Agni Kai is all from the tragic tone (hence why Azula’s heartbreaking end brings me close to tears every time).

Bonus: The way Katara takes out Azula is incredibly clever and badass. (I don’t think I need to expand this one. We all love narrative foils!)

For some people, they prefer the final Agni Kai because of the emotional weight of the conclusion of Azula’s arc; that weight combined with the conclusion of Zuko’s redemption, in my opinion, are pretty valid reasons to deem the final Agni Kai their favorite battle of the series. That said, there is one other important factor to consider in the question of the final Agni Kai vs Aang’s battle with Ozai:

People prefer the final Agni Kai because they blatantly misunderstand and/or misinterpret Aang’s arc of reconciling his being both the Avatar and the last airbender, thus preventing them from fully understanding and appreciating the weight of his battle with Ozai.

This point is more complex than the two I discussed previously, so I’m going to break this one down further to help simplify it. Let’s start with the most obvious thing:

“The lion turtle and energybending were cop-outs!”

I cringe whenever I see this; imagine admitting to the entire fandom how blind you were to the extensive foreshadowing about the lion turtle and energybending. Downright embarrassing. There are so many metas out there explaining how the lion turtle and energybending were not cop-outs and how A:tLA did foreshadow their influence (some people need to admit they just didn’t watch the show tbh). I’ll try to provide a quick summary:

Chiblocking demonstrated how chi/energy and bending were intrinsically linked from Day. One. Moreover, it did so numerous times; trying to claim that blatant foreshadowing is not there is… well, kind of embarrassing.

The lion turtle was foreshadowed in “The Library” (and moreover the lion turtle only appeared after Aang called out to the Spirit World; his meditation was an appropriate attempt to seek help from those wiser than him to resolve his dilemma, and thus his plea was answered).

If you’re gonna argue the lion turtle/energybending were convenient cop-outs, you better also critique how Suki conveniently was at the Boiling Rock/the ferry, Pakku conveniently had been arranged to marry Katara’s grandmother, Toph conveniently inventing metalbending, every other time a spirit showed up conveniently, etc. etc. etc. Don’t cherry-pick, hypocrites.

The lion turtle/energybending were not necessarily predictable, no, but they also were not meant to be. You’re not supposed to guess every detail of every finale of every show. So yes, the lion turtle/energybending were foreshadowed, and this foreshadowing done so in a way where after they were revealed it was intended to be an “oh my god, how did I not see that connection before?!” moment. (At least, so it was for me.)

Dismissing the lion turtle and energybending as a cop-out is an age-old, boring misinterpretation of Aang’s battle with Ozai, and by and large I think most of the fandom is tired of hearing it. Thus, if people don’t understand the lion turtle/energybending and their roles in the A:tLA finale, then they’re less likely to appreciate Aang’s battle with Ozai and therefore would prefer the final Agni Kai. Next common argument:

“Aang was able to re-enter the Avatar state because of a rock? Really? Another cop-out!”

Again, if you’re gonna criticize the rock, at least criticize every other plot device used in A:tLA. I mean come on. Some people will really just cherry-pick instances solely with Aang. How very convenient for them, huh?

But the fact of the matter is that the pointy rock is actually pretty important! No, it didn’t necessarily have to be a rock that allowed Aang to enter the Avatar state again, but it was necessary that the Avatar state was unblocked for him by a physical trigger. The Avatar state was removed from Aang by Azula’s lightning striking him (after he’d done the spiritual work to control it, too!), which is a physical block, thus requiring something to physically unblock it. By the end of Book Two, Aang is able to enter the Avatar state of his own accord (he successfully unlocked his chakras, after all) and had Azula not struck him in the back and killed him, he presumably would have been able to do so throughout Book Three. Did that physical item have to be a rock? Again, not necessarily, lmao, but where he and Ozai were fighting, well, there certainly were a lot of rocks, so it’s not like it didn’t make sense. (There’s a meta here that touches a bit on the necessity of the Aang needing the Avatar state physically unblocked, too.)

“Ozai was a stereotypical, boring villain! He was barely given any screen time!”

This isn’t entirely untrue. Everything viewers are told about Ozai is from other characters in the narrative; mostly Zuko, but also Azula and I’d argue Iroh, too. Ozai certainly was the big bad of the series, and little is provided regarding his personality beyond being power-hungry, racist, xenophobic, and abusive. But… that’s kind of the point. Ozai is written to have zero redeemable qualities. There is supposed to be zero sympathy for him. Hell, there’s arguably even zero reason for him to live on (which actually makes Aang’s decision to spare his life all the more powerful, but that’s for later). There’s one line in particular that really defines Ozai’s character to me:

“You’re [Aang is] weak, just like the rest of your people [the Air Nomads]! They did not deserve to exist in this world… in my [Ozai’s] world!”

Ozai is the epitome of fascism, imperialism, and a superiority complex if there ever was one in a cartoon. His words remind the audience that maybe he didn’t initiate the Air Nomad Genocide, but he continues to seek the same goal - obliteration of anyone he deems inferior (which is, well, every nation except his own). Aang’s battle with Ozai is literally a fight against fascism, and that’s a hell of a powerful metaphor. So while I understand leaning towards the Agni Kai in terms of familiarity with the antagonist (aka Azula), I do think some people gloss over Ozai too quickly. Yes, everyone knows that Ozai is a genocidal dictator, but I don’t think the implication of that position - especially what it means to Aang - really sinks in for everyone.

And now for the big one:

“Aang should have killed Ozai!”

If you are reading this and for some godforsaken reason think Aang should have killed Ozai, I beg of you: read these metas and analyses about Aang and his arc explaining exactly why that’s the wrong take. This point has been argued a million times over and the fact of the matter is that Aang choosing to spare Ozai’s life and thus uphold his beliefs as an Air Nomad is the ultimate triumph (a direct parallel to the Air Nomads being forced to fight back against the firebenders during Sozin’s attack and were thus not able to uphold their beliefs - the ultimate sacrifice). Furthermore, Aang choosing to spare Ozai’s life but take his bending is arguably a fate worse than death for Ozai. Ozai now lacks all of his power/prestige, will be forced to watch the son he despises rebuild his country, and any lingering supporters he may have can’t argue “oh well the Avatar had no reason to kill him!” because Aang didn’t kill him. He chose mercy. He proved himself better and stronger than Ozai could ever hope to be.

Furthermore, Aang staying true to his beliefs as an airbender is central to his character. The core belief of the Air Nomads was that all life was sacred (such was why they were all vegetarians). If he had killed Ozai, if he had been forced to betray his spiritual beliefs, then he would have completed the genocide of the Air Nomads that Sozin started a hundred years ago. Ozai’s death at Aang’s hands = the death of the airbenders’ culture. Full stop. How could he be expected to bring balance to the four nations if only three remained? Maybe this is just me, but the message of Aang being an airbender (the last airbender) and finding another way (e.g. energybending) to defeat Ozai in order to uphold the beliefs of his people is a much more powerful message than him having to kill Ozai (especially because no one else understood how important Aang’s spirituality was to him [not even the Gaang!]; Aang did what was right, even when the world insisted he was wrong).

(Sidenote: The previous Avatars did not tell Aang to kill Ozai. That’s right - not even Kyoshi. I believe she gave him this advice: “Only justice will bring peace.” Great news! Aang did exactly that. Why are some people still so pressed about it??)

Furthermore, if someone calls Aang’s beliefs and his decision not to kill Ozai childish (we’ve all seen those posts), I’m giving you permission to deck them, because so much of the roots of the Air Nomads’ spirituality is rooted in Buddhism, and like,, we know westerners struggle to comprehend any narrative that isn’t our own, but the dismissal of Aang’s beliefs without making the connection that they’re also dismissing the beliefs of many, many real people? Yeah, please sock those assholes in the jaw. Give them the finger. Glare at them. Whatever works for you. Those are the people with the most superficial opinions on A:tLA, and to be honest, it really shows. Please: make an effort to understand the eastern narratives at work within A:tLA. If you don’t, there are so many things you will miss out on, and you’ll also just look like a prick.

For me, Aang’s battle with Ozai is so powerful (and my favorite) because of the ending and its importance to Aang:

“I’m not gonna end it like this.”

Aang chooses mercy by taking Ozai’s bending instead of killing him.

Aang chooses to uphold the beliefs of his people and guarantee the Air Nomads live on in him.

Aang proves his soul is unbendable.

Aang enters and controls the Avatar of his own accord (not induced by trauma or a spirit).

Aang reconciles his being the Avatar with being the last airbender.

Aang is finally at peace with himself and the world around him.

In short, if a person doesn’t understand Aang and his character, then the significance of his final battle with Ozai will largely be lost, and thus it makes sense that they would gravitate more to the Agni Kai (which is arguably a less nuanced battle, as Azula’s position as a victim of abuse and Zuko’s tale of redemption are not exclusive to either western or eastern narratives, while Aang’s arc is largely more eastern in nature and thus something less familiar to western audiences).

I have no doubt that my personal bias influences my admiration of the final battle with Ozai, as Aang is my favorite character and his narrative is easily the most powerful to me (he is the sole survivor of genocide who still chooses to seek kindness in life instead of revenge), but regardless I’d argue the sheer thematic weight of Aang’s battle with Ozai outweighs that of the Agni Kai any day (although, to be fair, they are presenting different subjects, so take my feelings there with a grain of salt).

The Agni Kai is a tragedy. It is devastating. It makes you cry. Aang’s battle with Ozai is a triumph. It is hope. It makes you take a deep breath and look to tomorrow with a brave smile. And that is why it is the battle that concludes the series.

TL;DR - Both are fantastic battles in their own merit, but Aang’s battle with Ozai is underappreciated because of the fandom’s incomplete grasp on Aang’s arc and character while the final Agni Kai is often appreciated/hyped up for the wrong (*cough* shipping *cough*) reasons.

#IM GONNA ADD A LINE BREAK IN A HOT MINUTE IM ON MOBILE #amy answers #aang #atla #avatar the last airbender #azula #zuko #katara #ozai #final agni kai #atla meta #aang vs ozai #energybending #lion turtle #anon #air nomad genocide #air nomads #avatar the legend of aang #amy analyzes

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st-clements-steps · 4 years ago

Text

I’m not sure that the classical allusions you can read into asoiaf are always intentional. So even though I’m about to list a lot of superficial similarities between Theon and Odysseus and I’m gonna use that to say something about Theon, it’s not that I think Odysseus tells us anything about where Theon’s story is going. I personally think the classical allusions happen because of the weight of antiquity on Western thinking and because asoiaf is a rich new world made in patchwork and reconstruction from our own. (This is long, and kinda pointless so...)

Theon is an islander who, like Odysseus, has been kept away from home, and this dream of returning home is a key part what is propelling them both. Of course Theon does actually return to Pyke and feels rejected, and then what is propelling him is more the dream of glory which will in turn lead to his acceptance at home.

Those tropes we associate with Odysseus; the sea, the bow, the women, the clever move instead of the brave brazen fight, for whatever reason, GRRM has given those to Theon. Yes the clever move turns out more problematically and is in the end less effective than it is in the Odyssey, yes we’re more overtly uncomfortable about Theon’s relationships with women than we are about Odysseus’.

Theon uses a feint to sneak into an impossibly fortified place, just as Odysseus uses a feint to get the Greeks into Troy. Of course Theon does not throw any heirs from fortified walls nor raze Winterfell to the ground but events escape from his control to almost the same place anyway. (In the Odyssey no mention is made of Astyanax’s fate and it is not until later writers that the idea becomes possible canon, of course this ambiguity about whether Astyanax has been killed and by whom could be seen as echoed by Theon’s thoughts flitting between the story the Bolton’s need him to present to the North and the events we as readers experienced…there is no truth here, it’s all fiction) (Also, if Euripedes can remake a story, perhaps an author’s version is no more definitive than a fanfic writer’s response???).

I would characterise the general view of the Odyssey as unfortunate adventurer and the Greeks viewed him as a hero.

The Romans, meanwhile, think of him as a villain, cos he's a trickster who sneaks into fortified Troy. Modern writers tend to write him as problematic, he loves his wife and child but he throws babies from walls and Penelope waits virtuously whilst he doesn't. I'm not sure if anyone has, but what if his repeated shipwrecking, his near escapes from monsters and his being held as a hostage by Calypso was written as a tragi-horror victim narrative?

It’s here where Theon’s echoes of Odysseus become important to me. Yes, Theon’s experiences are generally more overtly horrific than Odysseus’. Yes, Theon’s trauma is condensed into a much tighter time frame. No, he is not allowed any respite in the arms of immortal women. But Odysseus’ story is hardly a buoyant adventure of daring do, he initially escapes the Cyclops, Polyphemus, only to rashly boast of his name, which is what begins Poseidon’s persecution of him. Repeatedly captured, he first loses his fleet, apart from his own ship, to cannibals, he later has to journey to the Underworld, before losing his ship and the rest of his men to a shipwreck demanded by the God Helios. He is then held for seven years by the immortal Calypso, and only released when Hermes demands it of her (Theon saves himself in the end, Odysseus doesn’t escape). Although Odysseus 7 years with her tend to be dismissed as good time sex slavery to a beautiful woman, Emily Wilson’s translation shows an Odysseus filled with despair and fear, “sobbing in grief and pain,” unbelieving when she promises to send him home;

Odysseus,

informed by many years of pain and loss,

shuddered and let his words fly out at her.

“Goddess, you have some other scheme in mind,”

Having said she’ll let her leave she then claims he will “glutted” with “suffering” before he gets home and he has to appease her with “diplomatic” words. Their relationship definitely appears coercive, even if it isn’t physically abusive.

As I said before (randomly, when I was supposed to be talking about Theon’s mirroring of Patroclus), when Odysseus is shipwrecked again by Poseidon and washes up half dead in Phaeacia, he tells his story, and they laud him as a hero, gift him a ship and treasure beyond that he pillaged from Troy.

Of course the show gives Theon the opportunity of being a hero in the modern sense, sacrificing his life for the possibility that everyone may survive (let’s save the biblical allusions for another time), and to me Theon’s escape with Jeyne in the books mirrors an Oprah book of the week in its tale of survival. However his creator continues to deny Theon the label hero. When GRRM talks about Theon wanting to be hero he surely means it in the classical sense, the revered warrior (I actually have no clue what GRRM means).

Well here is one of those classical heroes and Theon’s tale echoes his. A hero will, in one of the oldest pieces of fiction surviving today, fail, succeed, fuck, cry, expose himself to beautiful risk, travel into the underworld, be held captive, escape, hobble back to those he loves an old man (it’s magic, not abuse admittedly), fight with wrath but ultimately listen.

He is saviour and villain, victim and abuser, failing and triumphant, because the best stories (even those filled fantastical things) reflect the complexities of being human.

In the end, a hero is the person whose story we clamour to be told.

Tell me about a complicated man.

Muse, tell me how he wandered and was lost

when he had wrecked the holy town […]

and where he went and who he met, the pain

he suffered […], and how he worked

to save his life

Homer, The Odyssey trans. Emily Wilson 2018

#Theon Greyjoy #theon #odysseus #homer's odyssey #emily wilson #asoiaf #got #im not actually that interested in theon (or anyone) being defined as a hero #im interested in the idea that heroism is really really complicated #and that the characters who capture our imagination have always been complicated

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nneefa · 4 years ago

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RinShi for the ask thing: 1, 18, 29, 33, and 36 (trying not to add too many haha always love seeing your thoughts on them)

1. How do they fall asleep? Wake up? Any rituals?

It actually doesn't take much for Rin to fall asleep; give him a soft pillow and warm comforter set, and he's out like a light, but man, does it take forever to wake him up. Neither does it take much for Shiemi to fall asleep, though it's much easier for her to wake up, especially since she owned/owns a garden; you have to be an early riser in order to tend to one.

In a domestic/cohabiting relationship, there'd be lots of cuddling. Rin sometimes likes to put on a bit of a light show with his flames for Shiemi, showcasing his (lack of) talent when it comes to forming shapes/things, but really, it's because his flames are warm and he knows it's the quickest way for Shiemi to snuggle closer to him. I feel like Shiemi takes up reading as a hobby, especially before bed. Sometimes, she'll read aloud if Rin asks her what she's reading, but then he winds up falling asleep to the sound of her voice. When she reads to herself, she also likes to trace soft circles into his hair/scalp, which also puts him to sleep instantly. But then, there are times where she'd get really immersed in whatever it is she's reading up into the wee hours of the morning until Kuro finally takes it upon himself to jump on her lap to get her to finally go to sleep. And even still, she's overcome with a buzz to keep going, but then she winds up watching Rin's sleeping face, his half-opened eyes and the tiny trail of drool dribbling down the corner of his mouth, and eventually falls asleep (but not without laughing at him).

Shiemi almost always wakes up before Rin because he sleeps like a log, so the task of getting him to wake up falls to her. Sometimes, she shakes him awake; sometimes, she softly calls his name softly between peppering his face with kisses (she realizes that he likes this method the most even if it's not the most successful); and sometimes, she leaves the task to Kuro, who either shapeshifts on top of him, sits on his face, or pushes him onto the floor. Smelling salts work too, lol, but it's not something Shiemi does often.

18. What are their dates like? How long do/did they date? Do they ever feel the need to take a break from each other?

Their dates, at first, are awkward, because while they've been friends for so long, dating is something neither of them are familiar with and trying to navigate what that means for both of them comes with a challenge. Heck, Rin never thought in a million years that Shiemi would ever return his feelings, so he's still reeling from that. I feel like Shiemi would not only consult Izumo and Paku - because she's the only one with any dating experience, besides Shima, but no one's asking him anything, much to his dismay - but she'd put her shoujo manga to good use, as well as any dating magazines/books that Izumo would recommend.

They definitely make do on their date at the amusement park like they promised. It's like, the first date they ever have and it's also the one that sets the stage/tone for their relationship, because not only is it super awkward because they feel like there's a rulebook they must follow, especially Shiemi, but their friends end up crashing their date; however, it's thanks to that that the tension dissipates and they realize that they don't have to try so hard; that they should just be themselves and whatever tricky bits they encounter, they'll deal with it accordingly. They'd have study and at-home dates at each others' residences, and missions where they're partners would wound up as dates. Like, so long as they're together and having fun, that's a date to them, but they'd also go out for fun too, like to the park or out to eat (which isn't often because Rin is poor af thanks to Mephy). They definitely take advantage of their out-of-town missions, because then they'd go sightseeing, food sampling, etc.

Their relationship is ever-lasting. I mean, it's my hope that Shiemi lives as long as Rin does, given that he's a half-demon and he'll outlive all of his friends, including his brother (I really hope that's not the case), so yeah. I don't think they ever feel the need to take a break, because they were friends with their own lives prior to dating each other. They'll still do their own thing despite this because Rin and Shiemi respect the hell out of each other and their boundaries.

29. How do they handle disasters or emergencies? Minor injuries? Sickness?

They're opposites when it comes to this. Shiemi is a doctor and tamer. Disaster preparedness is her shtick, so she handles this kind of thing with relative ease. She's collected, if not a little emotional, but for the most part, she's got her bearings together. It's Rin, Mr. I Like to Use My Body as a Punching Bag and Action Now, Consequences Later that makes everything difficult.

Rin's body doesn't sustain injuries. He heals well within a hour or two, depending on the type of injury, but Shiemi insists - is downright forceful actually - on applying first aid, not just because it's her job as a doctor/healer to heal, but because she doesn't like to see Rin get hurt. He tells her that she doesn't need to do it, but Shiemi's not having any of it, and Rin can appreciate the sentiment, because even though he knows he'll never keep a scar or bruise, the thought the Shiemi would go out of her way to take care of him means a lot to him. He even likes to keep the bandaid/gauze on too, as a reminder of this. (Shipping aside, I feel like Rin feels this way about Yukio too). Shiemi has callouses for days, literal farmer hands, and she's handles her own injuries like a champ. Rin, of course, panics when she gets hurt, and he doesn't like the idea of her being in danger, but he also knows that Shiemi is perfectly capable of taking care of herself.

As for sickness, again, Rin doesn't get sick, but if he did, Rin would frickin' hate it, lmao. Like, on one hand, Shiemi taking care of him? 👌🏽 But, Shiemi's cooking? Yeah, no, thank the high heavens he doesn't have to suffer through another helping of grass and herbs. Rin dotes on Shiemi whenever she gets sick, not that she's a fan of being coddled, but the meals that come with being sick are to die for and having him take care of her warms her heart. Rin has experience taking care of sick people, because Yukio used to get sick a lot, so this would definitely transfer over to Shiemi.

33. What kind presents do they get each other? Do they only do it on special occasions?

Shiemi would put a lot of thought into gifts for Rin, not that he wouldn't, but like, Shiemi freaking loves this kind of thing. She gives him flowers - and I'm gonna headcanon that she knows the language of flowers, so it's extra special - and at one point, she even makes him one of her homemade hair accessories to help him clip his bangs back. She gives him bags of her special tea blends, and herbs and seeds to use in his recipes too. Rin knows that Shiemi really loves his cooking, so he'd make her a really good meal, especially with the ingredients she gives him as a thank you. Rin would buy her hair accessories and ornaments, little knickknacks and handicrafts because he knows she's super into that stuff. It's not relegated to special occasions, but sometimes just because they were thinking about each other while looking at something that reminded them of one another.

36. What's their greatest strength as a couple? Their weakness?

God, there's much to choose from: the fact that they confide in each other their insecurities; that they're a source of comfort for one another; that they're so protective and attentive of each other; or that they're such a deep source of encouragement and inspiration for one another. I really feel like all of that is tied together, because within each of those instances, they were doing all of those things! Argh! Grace, why would you ask me this hard ass question?! 🤣

Okay, so I'll go with how protective/attentive they are of each other as their greatest strength, and the fact that they still keep secrets from each other as their weakness. The fact that they pay so much attention to one another means that they know what makes the other tick; they know precisely what to say, what to ask and do that'll prick each other's consciousness to be a better them (which, again, is tied to how they're a huge source of encouragement for each other), like how Rin thought of Shiemi when controlling his flames in Kyoto against the Impure King or just the fact that Rin literally broke Shiemi out of her self-contained prison to pursue exorcism for herself. I'll go on forever if I talk about this, but they're such good friends to each other!

As for their weakness, I think they have of habit of trying to tackle issues on their own instead of learning how to rely on each other fully. They keep secrets from each other to their detriment. Like, Rin has had so many close calls with Demon!Rin because he doesn't want to accept and face his insecurites, and I can't quite shake the feeling that Shiemi's going to be in a world of trouble with "The Beautiful People" cult that could possibly be avoided had she told someone where she was going and what was happening. I mean, I know she was sworn to secrecy, but at the same time, it reminds me of what happened in the beginning of the manga, where Rin had to keep the fact that he was the Son of Satan a secret, and how it blew up into an awful mess because he didn't tell anyone. I feel like Shiemi will experience something similar had she confided in someone about it too.

#rinshi #okumura rin #moriyama shiemi #ao no exorcist #blue exorcist #otp: dance with me #mayhem950 #why did this take me a full day to answer lmfao!

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harryspet · 5 years ago

Text

A Wife’s Duty [2] h.s.

[Warnings] a f’d up fanfic based on the handmaid’s tale, commander x wife, harry styles x named oc, noncon spanking, abuse, verbal abuse

In which Harry establishes her place in his home.

check out my my #masterlist for part one!

Like, reblog and let me know what you think!

Part of her felt violated. Like Harry had reached into the darkest part of her mind. Of her soul. She thought she’d feel clean and rejuvenated with the Lord’s spirit after consummating her marriage with her husband. Instead, she felt dirty. Dirty for letting someone touch her in that way and dirty for feeling so much pleasure from it.

The next morning, Harry was not lying beside her. She debated continuing to lie in bed but the sun was already up and she didn’t yet know what would be expected of her here. She didn’t want to make a bad impression by rising too late.

She found clothes waiting for her on the dresser, most likely laid out by Imogene. She carried them to the bathroom and as she glanced at herself, she noticed how disheveled she was. Her hair was a wild mess, her nightgown was riding all the way up, and bruises decorated her waist and thighs. Her neck was bright red and, as she lifted her gown, she noticed her neck was too.

He might as well have given her tattoos.

She frowned at herself. Had he really held her that hard? She wondered if she had left any marks on him.

Last night, Harry was an animal and she was the sacrificial lamb that was thrown into his cave. The moment was only awkward on her end and it made her wonder how many times he had done something like that with another girl. He had her first kiss and virginity. What did she have from him?

Ember showered and dressed in a cream-colored knee-length skirt and a pastel blue sweater. She wondered if it is a turtle neck was a coincidence. Either way, she was grateful because she didn’t feel like parading around her new home like a common whore. No matter how Harry treated her.

In a pair of beige flats, she headed down the stairs, once again staring at that beautiful chandelier.

The aroma of cooking breakfast filled the air and she followed it to where Harry showed her husband was in the dining room. At the head of the table sat her husband, eyes focused on the newspaper in front of him. There was a placement sad beside him so she assumed it was for her but, still, she stood in the entrance waiting for him to acknowledge her.

It seemed he was already done with his breakfast, toast crumbs sitting on his plate and his coffee cup empty. He looked over his newspaper and his eyes raked over the girl in front of him. His wife. Newly deflowered, “Are you not hungry?” He asked, expectantly.

She blushed. Gosh, it seemed like she couldn’t make any of the right moves with him. She walked over to the seat beside him and pulled out the chair before sitting down, “I’m sorry for being late,” She folded her napkin neatly on her lap.

“I’m just early,” He spoke concisely as Imogen appeared to say good morning and to refill Harry’s cup of coffee. Ember smiled at the older woman and, despite how she felt like a new person from yesterday, the woman returned her warm smile.

There was lots of food spread over the table, more than both of them could probably eat. She hoped it wasn’t going to waste. Still, she filled her plate and began to fill the hole in her stomach.

“Alec is out back,” Imogene spoke to Harry who didn’t even lift his head from his newspaper, “It seems our new little filly is a bit of a handful. But she seems playful.”

“Tell him I’ll be out in a moment,” Imogene only nodded.

Swallowing a piece of bacon, Ember looked to Harry, “A filly?”

“Yes,” He looked up to see she was still confused and sighed, “A baby horse. A girl.”

Ember’s eyes seemed to widen a bit, “You have a baby horse?”

He began to fold his newspaper, “I have several horses. But you, Ember, have a baby horse,” She almost choked on her food.

“I-I what?”

“A wedding present from my uncle. She was born three weeks ago,” Ember blinked, eyes wide. She smiled but part of her was scared of smiling. Smiling meant she was okay with this. Smiling meant she was accepting a future here, “I’m assuming you’re happy about it.”

Ember nodded, “Yes, of course. No one’s ever gotten me . . . anything before. Let alone a horse. I cannot wait to meet your uncle, he seems like a kind man.”

Harry didn’t comment on that and she couldn’t read his eyes for a sign of anything. He was really good at hiding things.

“Who is Alec?” Ember asked next.

Harry frowned before taking a sip of his coffee, “He tends to the land and the animals. You can meet him after breakfast. If you finish anytime soon,” With that, she stopped talking and finished the rest of her plate.

Ember named her Blue. She wasn’t blue. She was blonde actually but she liked the name and neither Harry nor Alec protested it. She stood behind a tall white fence, watching Alec, as he played with the filly. She was still very wild, running away when she called him and biting at him when he got too close.

Alec was handsome with reddish-brown hair, freckles that decorated his nose and a nice smile. He seemed like someone she might’ve been friends with if she hadn’t been shipped off to Haynes Girls Reformatory at such an early age. There were no boys there, she almost felt weird when Alec was so nice to her.

Alec led the baby horse closer to us, “Here, you can pet her, Ember. I’ll put my hand down to show her it’s okay and then you can touch the same spot, okay?” She nodded eagerly.

A quick glance at Harry showed he was hesitant but Ember was too excited to care. She reached over the fence to place a hand on the filly, right where Alec’s had been, and gave her a soft pat, “See, she likes you, you’ll be riding her in no time.”

“I can ride her?” She looked at Alec with a childlike wonder.

“When she’s much older and trained. And after you’re trained too Ember,” Harry interjected. Her smile fell a little bit but she just continued to pet the horse.

I didn’t seem like Harry wanted to stick around for much longer after that. He escorted her back to the house, she waved goodbye to Alec, and he went off to do whatever the Commander's did. She thought she should be more curious about what he does but, honestly, it was the last thing on her mind.

She didn’t understand how the man could go from making her claim she was his to being cold and distant. She was more curious about the man beneath the mask of the Commander.

She found a small library on the second floor, each wall covered in a giant oak bookcase and a comfortable seating area by the window. She simply picked a book, a classic one that would make her look smart in front of whatever posh people Harry associated with. She unleashed the tight bun her hair was in and relaxed. A hundred pages later and she was dozing off.

She awoke to a car pulling in front of the home. Harry was back from the meeting with the guy on the phone from yesterday, she assumed. She was about to begin another hundred pages when a thunderous boom roared through the house, the slamming of a door.

Ember sat up from her spot, shutting her book slowly, before going to peak out the door. She can hear that downstairs Harry was yelling about something and Imogene was trying to calm him. He spoke some cursed words and Ember wondered how he could speak that way in front of such a nice woman.

Ember left the room, tiptoeing downstairs so she could see what was going on.

“What do they want from me, huh? To roll over like a dog! I sit on committees, I run campaigns, I go to their charity fundraisers, hell, I even got fucking married. And the comments keep coming. They won’t ever stop!”

“Harry, please, if you don’t go along with them-”

“I know, I know. Political suicide. It’s not what my mother would have wanted, I know. I fucking know-”

Ember rounded the corner into the kitchen, “You shouldn’t speak to her that way,” The words left Ember’s lips before she could stop them. His eyes narrowed her and even Imogene seemed to freeze.

“What did you say?” Harry seemed to snarl, taking a step closer to her.

“I-I mean … I-I wanted to help. I understand that you’re angry, Harry-”

“Commander,” he interrupted with venom in his tone, “I’m your Commander. You will address me as such. You will not help because you know nothing. You will not even take a single breath unless I approve it. And you’ll return to your room without another word, Ember.” He wasn’t shouting anymore though she felt a pounding in her ears. What was she to do? He looked like he was going to explode at any moment.

Her eyes began to well up with tears and she turned to walk away. She covered her mouth, trying to hold in a sob, as she hurried up the stairs.

Imogene was not the one who gave her the information that she was being summoned to Harry’s study. It was a younger servant, one who had a scar over her left eyes that told me that it was missing. She wondered who had been able to hurt a young girl in that way.

His study was opposite the library and two giant dark wood doors separated it from the rest of the house. Ember knocked with a trembling hand and she heard him murmur to come inside.

Ember slipped inside, her head so low that she couldn’t even take in the vast room. She felt her eyes on him and she shook even more.

He sighed, “You think I’m a monster, don’t you?” It wasn’t really phrased as a question.

“No, Commander,” she lied.

“Imogene thinks I am. Half of one at least. She’s understanding of my moods. She raised me so she’s accustomed to it. My intention was not to disrespect her and she knows that “Ember was quiet. Maybe that kind smile she received from Imogene meant more than she originally thought. The woman probably knew there were bruises beneath my sweater, “If there’s one thing you need to know about me, Ember, is that I do care. A lot. Imogene and Alec were all I had. And now that you’re here, I assume we will get to that place too.”

He was pacing in front of her and her eyes were now on his black shoes, “I also care about my family and, this is the life they wanted for me, so I will respect that. I care about having a favorable view in the eyes of my constituents and fellow commanders. To do that I need to have control in my city but also in my own home. You have duties as my wife and one of them is to not overstep me.”

“I’m sorry,” Ember whispered, the words barely audible.

“You will be,” He spoke as he grabbed her chin, forcing her to look at him, before dragging her over to a leather couch. He sat down before rustling her small body over his knee. He held her upper body down with his elbow as he lifted her skirt and lowered her panties, “You’ll make it worse if you squirm.”

Only five seconds later she had gone rigid as she realized she didn’t want things to get worse.

His palm ran over her bare bottom as he said, “I could’ve used my belt,” she flinched, “And I could’ve made Imogene and Alec watch since their members of this household. Consider yourself lucky that I’m giving you a chance.”

She whimpered and he only hit her bottom hard, “Say thank you.”

“Thank you!” She rushed out before quickly adding, “Thank you, Commander.”

“I’ll only give you ten if you can be a good girl and thank me for each one.”

She nodded quickly before saying, “I’ll be good, Commander.”

And then it really began.

One. “Thank you, Commander.”

...

Three. “Thank you, Commander.”

...

Seven. “T-Thank y-you, Commander.”

...

Ten. “Thank you, Commander! Please, please, please, stop!”

He sighed, lifting her underwear, before pulling the sobbing girl into his chest. She had nowhere to go, no other source of comfort so she held him tightly.

She was convinced that he would have little problems from her seeing as she could barely handle ten from his hand. Threatening the belt would be very effective.

He let the girl soak his white t-shirt with her tears as he ran a soothing hand down her back and fingers through her hair, “You’re mine, Ember, through good and bad behavior. In the end, I’m still going to be here,” Ember simply closed her eyes and welcomed the silence.

My request are open! Part 3 of this series is already posted!

#dark fic #harry styles #harry styles au #fanfiction #one direction #one direction smut #one direction fanfic #harry smut #au #series #oc #harry styles x reader #harry styles x y/n #harry styles x oc #one shot #dirty one shot #dirty harry #handmaids tale au #niall horan

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carewyncromwell · 4 years ago

Photo

“With straw, I'll weave a garland; I'll weave it wondrous fine;

With roses, lilies, daisies, I'll mix the eglantine,

And I'll present it to my love when he returns from sea...

I love my love because I know my love loves me."

~“A Maid in Bedlam”

((Here are three lovely variations of this traditional English ballad -- Juliette “Jules” Farrier belongs to @cursebreakerfarrier...and you can read the first part of this POTC AU for Carewyn and Orion here!! <33))

x~x~x~x

Of all the things Carewyn could’ve expected to happen on her voyage back to Port Royal, one was certainly not being tended to by the infamous pirate Captain Orion Amari -- and yet, here she was, her blue Navy coat discarded, sitting on his bed in his cabin as he wrapped her cut and bleeding hands in bandages.

The gesture felt familiar. She’d wrapped his arms and hands in bandages too, while he was staying with them. A few of his wounds had been from bullets, while others had probably been from evading canon fire -- he’d even lost the tops of his pinky and ring fingers on his left hand. It had been a challenge to bandage him properly, since he was shaking so badly...

Carewyn found herself staring at Orion’s hands more than his face as he worked. It was just too hard for her to look him in the face.

For this pirate captain to be that boy she’d helped, all those years ago...for her to see that boy again, after more than ten years...it was so surreal. It wasn’t hard to see that those ten years had changed them both too. The quiet, distrustful, anxious young man who’d flinched at her touch as if he’d never been shown any gentleness in his life was now the detached, unreadable, oddly honorable pirate who had surfed the stair railing down to the deck of her ship and serenely compared Percy to a parrot. It was foolish to act like he was still that same boy who had rippled over her mind off and on over the years whenever she felt most alone and afraid. Even so...

Carewyn’s gaze flickered up to Orion’s face. He was looking down at her hands like she had been, as he tied off the first round of bandages around her left palm and turned his focus to her right hand.

This Captain Amari...was truly nothing like she had expected, all the same.

“May I ask what this was from?” asked Orion softly.

He gestured to the scar on her right forearm.

Now that Orion had initiated conversation again, Carewyn felt comfortable enough to respond. As she’d said before, she wasn’t superstitious, but most of her fellow sailors were, and she’d been at sea so long that she’d grown used to not speaking until spoken to, so as not to needlessly upset anyone else.

“A Frenchman’s cutlass,” she replied. “I was engaged with one of his cohorts in a sea battle off the coast of Martinique. I might’ve lost my arm if Bill hadn’t alerted me in time.”

“Bill...the man who first gave you his name?”

“Yes.”

“Mm. It was fortunate he was there, then.”

Orion’s dark eyes lingered briefly on her scar before returning to bandaging her hand.

“Yes, it was,” granted Carewyn. “...I feel very fortunate to have met Bill and his family.”

Orion didn’t answer. Carewyn let them fall into silence again, her blue eyes once again drifting away.

Orion’s cabin was quite unlike a lot of the Navy cabins she’d visited. The finely carved wood pieces he’d collected evoked lions, unicorns, and ocean waves. Even his walls were decorated with pieces like a dock landscape and an Asian print depicting a dragon.

“That’s from Japan,” said Orion, when he noticed where she was looking. “Their dragons are benevolent creatures in charge of the seas and skies -- it seemed like good company, to have on board.”

“It’s beautiful,” said Carewyn.

She looked at Orion, her lips curled up in a small, wry smile.

“You have very good taste. I must wonder how much of this is stolen, though.”

Orion raised his eyebrows in amusement. “Not as much as you’d think. Though I admit, I may have purchased a few of these with coin I did steal.”

Carewyn gave an airy sigh, and Orion chuckled lowly.

“I’m surprised you didn’t decide to have some naked woman carved into your bed, like so many Navy officers do,” Carewyn said sardonically. “Aren’t they supposed to be ‘good luck?’“

“And yet women themselves are supposed to be bad luck on board a ship,” said Orion, his lips spreading into a wry smile. “A rather confusing contradiction.”

Carewyn scoffed. “Apparently women are only something a lot of men want on board a ship when they’re something they can salivate over.”

“A shame -- Skye is a woman, and she’s easily the fiercest of any of my crew. And...”

Orion’s eyes sparkled mischievously.

“...well, here you are, chosen as ship’s Captain.”

Despite the mischief in his eyes, though, there was an almost impressed sound somewhere in the back of his throat as he spoke.

Carewyn’s blue eyes softened slightly. “It’s certainly not where I imagined myself ending up.”

The traces of a smile on Orion’s face faded.

“...Nor I.”

His gaze again fell to his own hands as they wrapped her right hand in bandages that bit more gently.

“I never would’ve thought I’d find you here either. A captain of the Navy -- a soldier, surviving a War and then being forced to serve the will of the East India Company...”

His dark eyes narrowed ever-so-slightly, but they seemed sadder rather than angry.

“...It’s no proper fate, for a woman with so kind and free of a heart as yours.”

Carewyn felt like her heart was being squeezed. “Orion...”

She shifted forward and almost made to get off the bed, but Orion quickly knotted the bandage on her hand and clutched it between both of his. He raised his head to look her in the eye.

“I can’t act like I knew, or even thought seriously, that our stars would align again...but even with that...I’d imagined a life much better than this for you.”

Carewyn’s eyes grew a little smaller upon his face.

“...You thought of me?”

Something flickered at the back of Orion’s eyes -- was it uncertainty? His gaze flitted back down to their hands.

“...Yes,” he murmured. “Not...constantly, but...the memory of your voice was very soothing, on the most restless nights at sea.”

Carewyn stared down at Orion. The faint shyness in his expression, for the first time, made him suddenly look just like that boy again -- the bruised, scared, trembling boy she’d tended to and sang to sleep...

“I suppose...that was what I’d imagined, mostly,” said Orion, his voice lower than ever as he looked up at her again. “That you’d have married a man who you’d look after and sing for.”

Carewyn couldn’t completely fight back an amused snort. “As I said, the only marriage proposal I’ve been faced with was to Juliette Farrier...and I would never deprive Bill of his lady fair.”

Orion blinked at how wide her grin was while saying this. Then his expression softened.

“...A good reason not to accept it, then.”

His shoulders seemed to relax slightly. Carewyn’s eyes went down to their hands again too as she brought her left hand up to hold Orion’s right, so that they were now both holding each other’s hands.

“...I thought of you too, you know,” she said gently.

Orion looked startled; her lips spread in a soft smile as she kept her gaze downcast.

“As you said, it wasn’t constant or anything...but for whatever reason, you kept appearing in my dreams, at random times. Sometimes right before a battle, or on Jacob’s birthday...but for whatever reason, you just kept appearing. I don’t know...maybe I just subconsciously never stopped wondering what had happened to you...”

For a moment, Orion didn’t speak. His hands holding hers tentatively adjusted their grip around hers, almost as if he wanted to squeeze them, but didn’t for fear of hurting her.

“...Carewyn...”

His voice was so quiet and misty, and yet, there was something rippling in the back of it -- like a shadow moving behind fog...

Rap, rap, rap.

Both Carewyn and Orion stiffened at the sound of a knock on the cabin door. They immediately let go of each other’s hands and Orion shot to his feet as the door opened and McNully rolled his chair into the doorway.

“Captain,” he said, “Tortuga is within view.”

He glanced from Orion to Carewyn as she put down her rolled up sleeves and then reached for her blue Navy coat and pulled it back on.

“Thank you, McNully,” said Orion levelly, as he slipped his own long olive suede coat back on, fluffing the collar.

His face twisted in confusion, McNully rolled up next to his Captain, shooting both Orion and Carewyn a very pointed “side-eye.”

“According to my calculations, there’s a 98.7% chance that I’m missing something,” he muttered to Orion very coolly.

Orion gave him a patient smile. “Don’t worry -- it’s nothing that consequential.”

His eyes drifted over his shoulder in Carewyn’s direction. She’d finished buttoning up her coat and looked every bit the “Naval officer” again. Even when she faced him and spoke, she again sounded like she had when she’d first arrived on board.

“Is Tortuga to be where I’m deposited, Captain?” she said very coolly, folding her arms behind her and lightly puffing out her chest in typical soldier fashion. “I suppose I should be glad it’s not on a barren isle with a jug of water and a pistol with one shot.”

Orion raised his eyebrows amusedly. “I believe the barren isle would be a better place for you to end up than Tortuga, Captain. Fortunately my crew only has need of supplies, before we settle on where to drop you off -- I appreciate your patience.”

“What shall we do with him, while we’re getting supplies?” McNully whispered to Orion. “You don’t intend to leave him here in your cabin alone?”

“I don’t see why not,” said Orion airily. “He is our guest, is he not?”

“Orion.”

McNully’s voice had hardened noticeably.

“I see those cut ropes,” he muttered. “I see your decorative swords on the floor, stained with blood. I see the Captain’s hands are bandaged. It’s clear he tried to escape, and I’d say there’s a 86.3% chance he’ll try to do it again...unless there’s something you know that I don’t.”

Orion didn’t respond. He distracted himself by putting the decorative swords back on the wall.

Carewyn glanced from Orion’s back to his first mate. Even if his face was so hard, she could tell it was due to confusion and concern, not genuine anger or resentment.

‘Orion said I’d found a family,’ she thought to herself. ‘It seems he’s found one too...’

“Orion.”

Both Orion and McNully looked surprised when Carewyn spoke. Her voice was its usual youthful-boy-sounding pitch, but it was much less cold and distrustful than it had been.

“Go ahead and tell him,” she said solemnly.

Orion immediately put down the second of the two swords on a nearby dresser and turned around.

“What?”

“He’s your comrade-in-arms. He deserves to know.”

Orion looked oddly hesitant. Carewyn could tell he wasn’t sure how much to say -- after all, she did have multiple secrets. Not just the fact that they knew each other and that she’d hidden him from the Navy back in the day, but her ancestry...her real gender...

She swallowed back her fear and unease, putting forward the bravest face she could.

“If you trust this man...then it’s okay.”

She glanced at McNully. The first mate looked more confused than ever, and yet his face seemed less suspicious toward Carewyn than it had been, like he was starting to wonder if he’d misjudged her.

Orion stared at Carewyn for a very long moment, his dark eyes running over her face with an unreadable glint. Then, taking a deep breath, he nodded.

“McNully...I’d like you to meet Carewyn Cromwell.”

#hphm #hogwarts mystery #potc au #au #pirates of the caribbean #orion amari #carewyn cromwell #my art #my writing #my fanfiction #okay so this song?#it goes WAY back with me #I sang it in my high school choir and yeah it's just always stuck with me #I was so enthralled to find so many beautiful versions of it with slight variations on the lyrics #the traditional version is actually quite a bit grimmer as -- well -- a maid in bedlam is a woman trapped in an asylum!!#so her love finds her after she's presumably been thoroughly traumitized #either by mistreatment from his and/or her parents or from the grief of her love being sent off to sea maybe never to return #but yeah over time happier endings have been written of course #gotta say the 'captain jack' look REALLY suits you orion #and oh the PINING #you two are gonna have a rough road ahead of you before you guys can live happily ever after #but yes this AU?#I...absolutely love it #X3

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kingofterrors · 4 years ago

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I was tagged in this ask by @inktog - thank you!

I’m not great at tagging other folk, but if you see this and you fancy doing it, consider yourself tagged! Also, by the way, if anyone seeing this really likes being tagged in these kind of things, let me know! I will tag you in future!

This was hard. At first I was like, “I’m not sure I can even name ten relationships I ship”, and then had far too many as soon as I thought about it for more than ten seconds. So here we are. :)

First, list your top 10 ships without reading the questions below.

1. Luz Noceda / Amity Blight – The Owl House

2. Harrowhark Nonagesimus / Gideon Nav – The Locked Tomb Series

3. Sabran / Eadaz du Zāla uq-Nāra – The Priory of the Orange Tree

4. Caleb Widogast / Essek Theyless – Critical Role Campaign 2

5. Beauregard Lionett / Jester Lavorre – Critical Role Campaign 2

6. Harrowhark Nonagesimus / Ianthe Tridentarius – The Locked Tomb Series

7. Kara Danvers / Lena Luthor – Supergirl

8. Amity Blight / Boscha – The Owl House

9. Korra / Asami – The Legend of Korra

10. Percy / Vexahlia – Critical Role Campaign 1

Then answer the questions.

Do you remember the episode/scene/chapter that you first started shipping 6?

I’m going to be honest, it was from the very beginning of Harrow the Ninth – the Prologue, where we get that amazing moment of Ianthe kneeling down and taking Harrow by the chin. I’m going to quote, because this scene just marched up to my house, kicked my door down and stole my entire mind.

You were shocked into opening your eyes when you felt the girl opposite cup your chin in her hands – her fingers febrile compared to the chilly shock of her gilded metacarpal – and put her meat thumb at the corner of your jaw. For a moment you assumed that you were hallucinating, but that assumption was startled away by the cool nearness of her, of Ianthe Tridentarius on her knees before you in unmistakable supplication. Her pallid hair fell around her face like a veil, and her stolen eyes looked at you with half-beseeching, half-contemptuous despair: blue eyes with deep splotches of light brown, like agate.

Looking deep into the eyes of the cavalier she murdered, you realised, not for the first time, and not willingly, that Ianthe Tridenatrius was beautiful.

Dude.

Have you ever read a fic about 2?

Yup! More than one! I don’t generally seek out smut for my ships, for whatever reason, but I freely admit that I sought out smut for these two. And found it. Found it with quality in spades. Praise be. Is this a good spot for recs? If so:

Sleepless by pugoata

Like a Lullaby by SweetScentences

Has a picture of 4 ever been your screensaver/profile pic/tumblr?

Nope. I tend not to change my pics very much, and they tend to focus on single characters rather than ships, again for whatever reason.

If 7 were to suddenly break up today, what would your reaction be?

Yeah… Well of course they’re not together in canon. I ship supercorp foolishly, helplessly, knowing all the while that the chances of it becoming reality are vanishingly small. That said, we don’t ship purely for canon, do we? So if Kara and Lena were together and then were to break up I’d be disappointed, but I suspect they’d find their way back to each other. These two have a history of being separated, then rediscovering their love and coming back together. I give it a couple of weeks. :)

Why is 1 so important?

Man, I don’t know! It snuck up on me! I think there’s something here about firstly, the context for Lumity. Amity’s crush on Luz was just presented as normal, as something fine and good and natural, and that meant so much to me. There’s a softness here that I love so much. I also heavily empathise with Amity – the trying to live up to expectations and feeling that you have to hide yourself behind emotional walls – and the thought of her finding love with someone like Luz who is so open and emotionally giving does my heart good. I want Amity to find acceptance and openness with Luz. I want Luz to find herself seen and valued for exactly who she is by Amity. I want to see them finding strength and security in each other. I just love them, you guys.

There’s a bit in this wonderful YouTube video essay, which I recommend to the moon and back – watch it if you haven’t! (“The Owl House is Great and Here’s Why, by Film Freak”) Where the essayist concludes their section on Lumity by saying: “I don’t know if Disney will chicken out in the future with regards to Lumity or any other queer rep, but for now I’m cautiously optimistic. Maybe I just have rose-tinted goggles for how soft this ship is, but whatever, let me stan just once.”

And… yeah. That.

Which one has the strongest bond?

Wow, tough one. Probably Sabran and Ead. They’ve gone through everything together, and are prepared to wait for each other in the end. Their bond is strong enough to take that and more.

Which ship has lasted the longest?

For me or the ship itself? For me of all of these probably Korra / Asami. Shipped ‘em first time I saw LoK, and haven’t stopped.

How many times, if ever, has 6 broken up?

Have they ever gotten together? If they ever did get together they’d break up every couple of days. These two are a mess, and their relationship is a toxic trainwreck. Still ship ‘em though. Can’t help it. Sometimes ships are just fascinating. If this was real life I’d want them to not come within shouting distance of each other. In fiction I’m riveted.

If the world was suddenly thrust into a zombie apocalypse, which ship would make it out alive: 2 or 8?

Definitely Harrow and Gideon. Those two have fought through apocalyptic situations before, and my money would be on them to do it again. Plus they are the quintessential battle couple. Can you imagine Harrow’s bone magic and Gideon’s martial expertise being unleashed on zombies? Those two would save the whole damn world.

Amity and Boscha would put up a good fight, I think, but I can see them disagreeing on key decisions which might hurt their chances.

Did 7 ever have to hide their relationship for any reason?

Given that Kara is a whole secret identity, we could say they are continually hiding their relationship when Kara is out there as Supergirl? I could also see them hiding their relationship at Lena’s insistence to protect Kara from Lex before she realised Kara was actually Supergirl. She might even want to do that afterwards as well, on reflection. Lena is very protective of Kara, ironically enough. :)

Is 4 still together?

Right now? This is another non-canon ship. That said, this is one I’m genuinely hoping for a canon appearance from. Their relationship might be put under strain from the fact that they’re both mages, and mages tend to get selfish and power hungry (or at least these two claim that’s how it goes). I think they’d work through it though. These two talk big about their own selfishness a lot, and then in practice are very caring and protective of others. I can see that extending to each other. Just kiss already.

Is 10 canon?

Yup! My token het ship are still very much together, growing old and having babies.Good for them. :)

If all 10 ships were put into a couple’s Hunger Games, which couple would win?

This is an invitation to go into huge depth, but my initial feeling is that Harrow and Gideon would again have it hands down. Those two are world-endingly powerful. Although that said, Kara and Lena might give them a run for their money. Pure power ranking? Let’s see…

1. Harrow / Gideon

2. Kara / Lena

3. Korra / Asami

4. Beau / Jester

5. Caleb / Essek

6. Percy / Vex

7. Harrow / Ianthe

8. Sabran / Ead

9. Amity / Luz (no shade, but these guys are literal children. Grown up they’d put up a better showing, I’d bet)

10. Amity / Boscha

Has anyone ever tried to sabotage 5?

I mean… Fjord? I wonder sometimes what would have happened if Beau had genuinely put in a play for Jester, rather than stepping back to let Fjord make his move. She very obviously decided that Fjord should have a free shot, and I wonder how it would have worked if she actually decided to compete. Would Fjord have stepped back to let Beau make a try for Jester if he was aware of her feelings? I don’t know. A genuine competition would have been heartbreaking but oh so interesting to see.

Do you spend hours a day going through 3’s tumblr tag?

Not hours, but I have put some good time into finding fanart for these two. There is some good work out there!

If an evil witch descended from the sky and told you that you had to pick one of the ten ships to break up forever or else she’d break them all up, which ship would you SINK?

Amity / Boscha. Sorry you two! I wrote myself into shipping Amity and Boscha, when I fell in love with Boscha and decided she could actually be good for Amity in a snarky, take no shit kind of a way. I would still love to see more of them. (Halfway through that one-shot btw.) But if it was them or everyone else? Sorry guys. :(

#ask games #shipping asks #this was fun!#thanks for tagging me!#long post

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luna--reading · 5 years ago

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[PICK A CARD] WHO WILL ASK ME OUT NEXT?

Hello lovelies~ ♡

This is a pick a card reading for “Who will ask me out next?” Please do find peace if it doesn’t resonate with you~

So take a few minutes to mediate on these 4 piles:

Pile 1 – 4 (from left to right)

Once you’re ready, just scroll below to find the reading that you have chosen!

You can always leave a comment or simply like the post if it resonates with you, thank you so much~ ♡♡♡

Pile 1:

Tarot: 6 of Cups, Judgement, The Tower, 5 of Wands, 2 of Wands

Oracles: Unrequited Love – There’s not enough attraction or chemistry to keep this relationship going. / Lantern Fairy (24) – A clear solution. / Mildew Fairy (15) – Clean-up time. / PURIFICATION / CHANGE / Mediation for Clarity / Virgo

Okay to start off, the sign that I drew is Virgo, so you might be a Virgo or dealing with someone with Virgo strong in their chart. Or strong Virgo in Mars (with The Tower card) or in Pluto (with the Judgement card). Or maybe you or the other person has strong Mars or Pluto energy in either of your charts. But if it doesn’t resonate, then it’s alright as this is just for some of you!

So, I see this person as someone you have a past with, there is a strong ex feeling (to be honest), but if you are single and have no such person, maybe you can click off to another pile or just someone that you know in the past. I feel like this person is someone you have a rough history with, with the 5 of Wands, I see a lot of competition, conflict when you were together with this person in the past, even if it’s not a committed relationship but just some sort of situation-ship. And I see that there has been a lack of balance in this particular connection, things just see like it was unrequited, there was an unstable foundation in this connection, which meant that things crumbled pretty quickly for the both of you.

So, I see this person coming back from the past and I see that you might hesitate when this person really asks you out with the 2 of Wands. You are stuck at crossroads, not knowing if you should accept or reject, because maybe deep down you still have feelings for this person. No matter how did this connection ended previously, you feel like there is still something special within this connection and you are hesitating. Because, I do see that things were rough for you, and it’s kind of like you know you deserve better but you still went ahead with this connection because you felt like you really wanted it and I won’t say you entirely regret it but you are questioning the worth of taking that risk back then.

So, you are hesitating, you don’t know whether history will repeat itself or if things will change. Now, this person there is a change of energy, I strongly feel. With Purification, Change, Mildew Fairy and even the Judgement card which has strong Pluto energy (which speaks of transformation), I see that this person has changed upon the last time you see him/her. This person finally sees that there has been something lacking in the way they deal with relationships, or just things not right so I do see that after this breakup or no contact/communication, they have learnt, and they have start changing. With the Mediation for Clarity, I do see them going within themselves to ask themselves what is it that they want out of this relationship. So, I do see that they have been holding on to their feelings for you and that this has encouraged them to make the changes in the way they deal with relationships.

Now, whether or not you accept this offer, it’s entirely up to you. But I do see that eventually, with the Lantern Fairy as well as the sunflower in the Purification card, I see happiness in your upcoming love life. Maybe you decide to accept this offer and you find that yeah, there are changes and things are just progressing for you. Or maybe you decide to reject this offer and you see things clearer, in the sense that you understand what is it that you really want in relationships. Because the Virgo energy in love also talks about how you might have been hurt in the past, and now you tend to be very choosy or picky in your partners because you just don’t want to get hurt like how you did in the past. But at the same time, I see you as someone who is very analytical when it comes to love, you understand what is it that you want and you don’t want and you set your goals on them very clearly. Or maybe this is the energy that you are asked to embody, to understand yourself first before you make any decisions in love.

Pile 2:

Tarot: 8 of Wands, 3 of Wands, 4 of Swords, The Sun, 7 of Swords

Oracles: Engagement – Your love life is ascending to a higher level of commitment. / URANUS / PLEASURE / FULFILLMENT / COURAGE / Plant the Seeds

To start off, the zodiac sign energy that I have pulled out is Uranus so there might have strong Aquarius in either one of your charts, or might have strong Leo with The Sun card. But there is a very strong mixture of Air (Gemini, Libra, Aquarius) as well as Fire (Aries, Leo, Sagittarius) in your reading. But, if it doesn’t resonate, it’s alright as this is just for some of you!

Okay so I’m seeing this person might be living at a distance from you or you might have known this person either online or when you are traveling. With the strong Wands energy, I do see great attraction from this person. So this person does see you as someone who is very positive, very cheerful, there is an element of feeling fulfilled when he/she is with you. I kind of get the feeling that you guys might be in some sort of situation right now, like it’s not exactly a full-blown relationship but some sort of situation-ship with the Plant the Seeds card. This card, to me, reflects the 7 of Pentacles in tarot so I feel like you guys have already been talking, you guys have already been laying the ground for this foundation for your relationship and the next step will be to ask you out!

I feel like maybe you know this person for quite a short period of time, but things are escalating pretty quickly for the both of you (or at least on this person’s end, they want things to progress quickly with you). Because with the 7 of Swords, I’m not exactly getting a “deception” feeling, I feel like they aren’t hiding anything from you, and I just feel like given your connection with this person, there is no need for them to hide their feelings from you because I do get a sense that this person is actively trying to pursue you. So, when clarified, I feel like what this person is “hiding” is their desire to bring this whole connection to a higher level of commitment with the Engagement card, 4 of Wands and the 2 of Cups. I see that they see you as the perfect match for them and maybe you guys aren’t official yet but they are already seeing that future with you.

Okay so more characteristics or description of this person, so I really do see that this person is someone who seeks pleasure in the little things. They are courageous, they know what they want and I do feel that they will get what they want. They are a go-getter and that they can be creative in the ways that they attain these goals. It’s like this very fiery, passionate energy in dealing with their goals but at the same time, there is this energy of being introverted, keeping to themselves. So, it’s more of like they get easily happy with the things that they have but when there is something that they really want, they will go forward to attain them.

Pile 3:

Tarot: 4 of Cups, 5 of Wands, Queen of Swords, King of Cups, 4 of Wands

Oracles: Stay Optimistic about your Love Life – Positive thinking and faith will bring your romance. / Dragonfly – Live life to the fullest. / SCORPIO / PURIFICATION / Learn from Life

Okay, so the sign that I have pulled is Scorpio, in addition to the King of Cups (which usually represents Scorpio as well but strong water in their chart – Pisces, Cancer, Scorpio) or strong air (Gemini, Libra, Aquarius) in either yours or their chart. But if it doesn’t resonate, it’s alright as this is only for some of you!

So, moving on, I feel like this person has a very optimistic vibe – in regards to love, work or just life in general. They look at things from a very positive perspective and that they are someone that will always live in the present. I feel like on the surface, they might seem like someone who loves a challenge and that they aren’t afraid to fight for what they want. They aren’t afraid to voice out their opinions, or just anything in general. They can be very sharp with their words but I do see them as someone who is very honest in their thoughts.

But deep down, I feel like this person can come off as pretty mysterious, they are someone who has very deep emotions and they might not necessarily voice out these emotions to the people around them. Especially with the Dragonfly, I feel like they are constantly changing, there is this vibe of self-realisation, they know what is it that they should change in order to attain their goals. So, they are very goal-driven but at the same time, they work smart to attain these goals.

With the Dragonfly as well as the sunflower in the Purification card, they see you as someone who brings in joy, happiness and positivity into their life which is kind of in line with their own personality. They might be someone who teaches you important life lessons (or you might have taught them some major life lessons) but I see that this person sees you as someone who is willing to learn from them or just from life in general – someone who seeks for progress in whatever you do. With two 4s card – 4 of Cups and the 4 of wands – they see you as someone who can provide the same stability and security that they can if they were to start on this relationship with you. Afterall, 4s are about stability and security but at the same time, it represents hard work and determination.

So it’s kind of like both of you are pretty similar, or at least that is how they view you and that they really do admire these traits about you, which it could also be a mirroring effect (with the 4 of Wands) whereby you are admiring these traits about them, and it could possibly be the person of interest in your mind.

Pile 4:

Tarot: 5 of Wands, Ace of Pentacles, 6 of Pentacles [3 of Wands, The World, Knight of Wands], Knight of Swords, Queen of Cups

Oracles: Pay Attention to the Red Flags – The signs are cautioning you. / Love Yourself First – Your self-respect makes you romantically attractive. / Fairy of the Divine Hand – Intoxication, distorted view, overindulgence / CANCER / Mediation for Peace and Security / RELEASE / EMBRACING

Okay, so the sign that I have pulled is Cancer, in addition to the Queen of Cups (which usually represents Pisces as well but strong water in their chart – Pisces, Cancer, Scorpio) or strong air (Gemini, Libra, Aquarius) in either yours or their chart. But if it doesn’t resonate, it’s alright as this is only for some of you!

Okay so I have been hearing “work” as I was shuffling through the pile, so maybe you know this person through work but when I asked what are some possible scenarios for you to meet this person, it shows that you might have known this person while travelling. Or travel is an important aspect in your or the other person’s work or just simply travelling is crucial in this connection.

So, for a small group of you, I feel like this person might have some unhealthy habits that might cause a small issue in this connection with the Pay attention to the red flags, Fairy of the Divine Hand and the 5 of Wands. I see that there might have already been a conflict with this person in regards to whatever unhealthy habits or thoughts or just traits with this person. But that is really just a small group of you, from what I see.

So, I feel like this person is a good communicator, they know how to communicate their thoughts clearly, they can be seen as someone who is rather sociable – just having a way with their words. I see them working very hard right now to build on their finances (specifically) with the two Pentacles card. Because its kinds of feel like they take on the Knight of Swords energy and they see you as the Queen of Cups energy. So, there is this sort of imbalance in “status” and that they are trying to improve that imbalance through improving their finances. Or it could be finances are an important aspect in their lives and right now, that’s what they are trying to improve on.

With them seeing you as the Queen of Cups, I feel like they see you as a loving individual, because to me, the Queen of Cups is the most loving queen in the deck and that you have so much love to offer to them. The Knight of Swords, talks about communication but Swords energy also reflect on our thoughts so I do see them thinking of you and with it being the Knight (which is all about taking action), I do see them thinking of taking action, moving towards you because you provide that sense of security to them. I feel like you have been working on yourself which really attracts this person into your life. They see your worth and they see you building on yourself with so much self-love and self-care and now, that’s why they are thinking of taking action towards you by asking you out!

They see a stable foundation that is possible in this connection with the Ace of Pentacles and that they just really want to get things back into balance in regards to their insecurities. Because with the Release card, I see certain negative energy needing to be release before they advance in this connection but I really do see them slowly embracing their weakness, embracing themselves and to move forward. So if you think you might have a history with this person, and now they are coming forth, to tell you that they have already release certain negative patterns and that now they are a changed person.

#pickacard #pickacardlove #lovereading #pick a card #tarotreading #tarot reading #love #tarot

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