#I didn’t realize I missed this fandom as much as I do until I started getting pulled back in

[dreamsofbroflovski]

Leopold "Butters" Stotch x Reader - sweet escape

Also available on ao3!

Summary: When you and your darling boyfriend break up, Eric Cartman's inner cupid decides to make sure you two get back together... By fucking your way right out of that argument.

Warnings: Explicit Sexual Content (EVERYONE INVOLVED IS ABOVE THE AGE OF CONSENT), Explicit Language, Cisgender female Reader, Aphrodisiacs, Nipple Play, Nipple Orgasm, Penis In Vagina Sex, Bathroom Sex, Creampie

A/N: I've had this in my Docs for almost 2 months now, and never got to properly finish it. Then yesterday I went berserk and stayed until 4am writing and cleaning up the draft so I could have it up by today.

We have an utter drought of Butters x Reader smut in this fandom, so I hope I did our sweet guy justice.

Obligatory "English is not my first language, if anything sounds like total nonsense it probably is so please let me know" This is also my first fic after whole years without writing anything creative and my first smut work in general and IDK how to feel about it

It was your average Monday morning in Park County. People from all walks of life had frowns on their faces as they made their way to school or work, missing the protection of their warm blankets and the peacefulness of a deep sleep. In your high school, most of the students hung about in the hallways as they waited for classes to start, and the cliques standing around together provided some warmth for its members, both emotionally and physically.

At the end of one of the corridors, in one of the staircases, hung out a particular group of young men, lazing around and chatting about their weekend like everyone else. Some of them stood, leaning on the wall or the handrail, while others sat on the steps, basically creating a barricade against anyone who wanted to go up or down the stairs - not that many people tried, anyway; over the course of their high school days all the way to the current senior year, the South Park boys had kind of made that particular part of the stairs their hangout spot, and the other students really just preferred to take any necessary detours than have to deal with the certified biggest assholes in the whole school.

As they began to engage in yet another heated debate over some useless topic, almost none of them saw a certain blonde man arrive. This was not abnormal - most people were never paying attention to Butters, unless they needed him for a favor. What was abnormal, however, was the expression he carried. Butters was a normally friendly and peaceful person, always with a smile on his face even in the most inhospitable of days; to see him like he was now, walking with heavy steps like a soldier, his face down and gaze fixed on his own feet, it didn’t take much from anyone to see that he was not doing well. 

“Hey there, fellas.” He spoke in an unusually low voice, not looking up for even a second to acknowledge his peers. Almost all the other boys responded with a quiet Hey or a quick movement of the head, but he didn’t acknowledge either of those greetings, too engulfed in his own feelings.

“Oh, hey, Butters, there you are.” Cartman said, looking briefly at his direction but almost seeing past him, clearly not realizing what was amiss - Eric couldn’t care about someone else’s feelings to save his life. “Thank God you’re here, I have to talk to you about something later and it’s really important, if you didn’t show up it would’ve really fucked me over. You’re really gonna have to make up to me later for that. We’ll go over what you can do during lunch, so tell your bitch to - hey, where’s your bitch, anyway?”

“I DON’T KNOW, I DON’T CARE, AND IF ANY OF YOU DO THEN YOU CAN GO FUCK YOURSELVES!” was Butters’ immediate answer, in such a thundering angry tone that it made the whole group flinch in fear. This was the first moment he actually looked at his so-called friends that Monday, and his face was one of pure fury. “And if YOU-” he turned in his heels to face Cartman, pointing a finger at his face, “-think I’m going to be a part of whatever fucking evil deeds you have planned right now, then you better sit that fat ass of yours down, because I ain’t helping you anymore, got it?” He turned again to glare at the rest of the guys, who all had wide eyes. “Or any of you bitches either! I’m done with you jerks! DONE!”

“Dude, dude, calm down, it’s okay-” Kyle was the one to first try and appease the situation, seeing as everyone else was too afraid to make a movement. He tried to reach an arm out to Butters, but it was promptly slapped out of his reach by the latter.

“IT’S NOT FUCKING OKAY! Everyone hates you, y’all fucking hate each other, and then you sit around here and pretend to be best friends! Oh, but y’all won’t say anything because if you do y’all gon’ have to hang around with fucking Kip Drordy ‘till graduation! And I’ll tell you what else-”

He eventually became engulfed by his own rage, breathing rapidly as he looked around for anything else he could say his truth about.

“Easy there, buddy. Look, I haven’t had breakfast yet, how about you and I go pick up a snack in one of the vending machines?” Kenny tapped on Butters’ shoulder, gesturing in the direction of the canteen.

“I don’t want no goddamn snack!” Butters yelled right in Kenny’s ear, but the latter didn’t even acknowledge the rudeness, being used to worse back at his house.

“Yes, you do. Now let’s go.”

The whole staircase group watched in silence as Kenny dragged Butters far away, and then all faces turned to Cartman.

“Great job there, fatass.” Kyle snarled, rolling his eyes.

“Fuck you, Kyle! What the hell did I do now?” Cartman raised his voice, pointing a finger in Kyle’s face, then signaling with his other hand towards the corridor through which Butters had just left. “He’s the one that started acting like a chick on her period! That’s got nothing to do with me!”

“You provoked him, dude! You know he’s sensitive about that shit these days!”

“Butters is always sensitive, dude! What is his problem NOW?”

The other boys looked at each other, unsure if Cartman’s behavior was legitimate. “You really don’t know what you did?” Kyle asked, almost a surprised tone in his voice, his eyebrows arched.

“No! If I’m going to be blamed for shit, at least tell me what it is!” Eric huffed, tired of the back-and-forth.

Kyle took a deep breath. “Butters and (Y/N) broke up this weekend.”

The news had Cartman legitimately shocked. ��Really? Why didn’t he tell me?”

“But he did. He told all of us.” Stan picked up his phone and turned the screen towards Cartman, with the messages app open, and started scrolling up quickly with his free hand, which made it impossible for the other to be even able to read anything. “It’s all over the group chat, dude.”

“Oh, right. I didn’t read that shit, I was rushing the battle pass for the new Fortnite season.” Cartman waved his hand in dismissal and Stan put his phone back in his pocket.

“Then you can’t complain about not being informed of stuff as soon as it happens.”

“Alright, alright, my bad. But man, hope they get back together.”

Eric wasn’t really feeling bad about causing Butters to snap or worried about your romance out of care for his friend. More so, like everything else in his life, the fatass wanted you to sort your issues because that would bring him personal benefit. He needed your lover for something in the coming days, a very important plan he had been cooking, and that breakup could very well ruin it all.

When you and Butters first got together, Cartman thought this was the death of his most useful pawn, maybe he’d even have to spy on your relationship to make sure you wouldn’t be too much of an inconvenience. To his surprise, the opposite turned out to be true - the already affable young man became even more docile, if that was even possible. He was also willing to do damn near anything if it meant your happiness, so the only thing Cartman ever had to do to get his help was make up some bullshit story about how that scheme was actually going to be great for your relationship and how you’d be so glad if Butters just assisted him with this one thing (despite said thing having nothing to do with you at all, and you normally not being aware of the stuff until it happened). Since the blonde was mad at you, that meant the usual strategies wouldn’t stick.

Whatever it was that was creating this rift between you two, it had to end fast.

“But why the hell did they break up, anyway?” Eric continued, hoping to gather more information that he could use to reverse the situation.

“You’d know if you read the group chat!”, three or four of the guys answered in unison.

“Hell, I don’t read the group chat either and even I know what happened”, said Craig. He wasn’t usually one to engage in his colleagues’ dumb fighting, so, since the most aloof person on Earth had an opinion on the subject, Cartman knew he’d been missing out.

“You don’t read the group chat?!” Tweek yelped, looking at Craig with a panicked expression on his face - even more panicked than the one he had at any given time. “ACK!- You gotta read it, babe! What if one of us gets injured, dies, and you never find out because you didn’t read the group chat? What if EVERYONE dies and our last wishes are all in the group chat? UGH!”

He then seemingly got really scared of this hypothetical situation he himself created, proceeding to hyperventilate and tremble on the spot.

“I don’t read them because you do, babe. Then you tell me everything. Your texts are the only ones I ever need to read.” 

Craig patted Tweek’s hair a few times and kissed him on the forehead after speaking, which seemed to calm down the anxious male, who let out a contented sigh as his lungs seemed to finally allow him to breathe properly again. Everyone else around rolled their eyes at this, and Jimmy, out of the couple’s line of sight, stuck his tongue out and made a gesture pointing down his throat as if going to vomit.

“What do you guys do when the girls are mad at you, though?” Kyle asked, looking across the group, focusing on no one in particular - Kyle was the only one there who never managed to be in a long-term relationship (his surreal bad luck with women was extremely good content for jokes around those parts), and wouldn’t have an answer to that particular question.

“I just fuck mine ‘till she’s stupid”, Clyde answered immediately, with a hint of pride in his voice.

“Jesus, Clyde!” Tolkien gawped at the man next to him. Even if they were used to that type of vulgar speech, hearing it early in the morning on a Monday was a less than ideal setup. “Didn’t your mom teach you some manners or something?”

“As a matter of fact, no. She couldn’t.” Clyde looked sad for a moment. “But it’s real, you guys. Whenever Bebe starts bitching my ear off about some nonsense, I just take her somewhere private and give it to her good. By the time we’re done, she can’t even remember what it was she wanted, so it’s a win.”

“She probably just drops the issue because she knows you’re too stupid to hold any kind of deep conversation with”, stated Craig, earning a chuckle from most of the guys.

“Hey! It’s not like you’re any kind of master communicator either, Mr. Don’t-Read-The-Group-Chat!” Clyde retorted, hitting Craig - and Tweek, by association - right where it hurted.

By then, Cartman had tuned out the voices of all the other guys, the gears in his mind turning furiously. Clyde, however much of an idiot he could be, had unironically given him the solution to his most pressing problem. 

༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚𓆩♡𓆪༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚

Later on, at night, the only lights on in a particular suburban street were those in the kitchen of the Cartman household.

Eric had an old cookbook open in the counter in front of him, alongside an assortment of ingredients and kitchen utensils. The food laid out seemed like your average components for making cupcakes - sugar, eggs, flour, the works -, but, hidden in the middle of it all, camouflaging itself nicely with the vanilla extract in a way that one would really need to pay attention to realize, was a bottle containing an edible aphrodisiac concentrate - the wonders of same-day delivery allowed it to be dropped off at Cartman’s doorstep right that afternoon when he bought it in the morning. 

After being done with all the other ingredients in the bowl, following the instructions in the book to a tee - Cartman could fool around with many things, but food was not one of them -, Eric grabbed the tray with the liners he had set and transferred the mixture to them. After that, he picked up that one particular bottle, turning his attention to two specific tins closest to him in the tray, lined with red cases. The bottle had instructions in the back of it - thorough information about its content, advice about the amount that was to be used and general warnings -, but the cook was having none of that, instead dumping the liquid in the two tins until he felt satisfied. In his mind, the more effect it made, the easier for him.

When that was done, he carefully put the tray into the oven and moved on to other parts of the recipe.

༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚𓆩♡𓆪༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚

The next day, Eric Cartman was on a mission. Along with the usual backpack, he carried with him to school a small box that smelled faintly of vanilla. The cupcakes had turned out really dang nice, if he could say so himself, and now it was time to pacify a certain pair of lovebirds.

After going to the usual staircase, he was surprised to find that his target, the only one of those assholes he cared to see today, was not around - but it wasn’t without reason; ever since his outburst yesterday, most of the other guys had decided to leave Butters alone with his anger until the issue was resolved, so he got warned to take his sulking elsewhere because it was bringing everyone down. As soon as he found that out, Eric turned on his heels and continued through the hallways, leaving his other colleagues very confused.

Making his way to Butters’ locker, he found the blonde male unaccompanied, mumbling some nonsense as he picked up everything he needed for the upcoming classes.

“Butters! Hey, buddy.” Cartman approached him with a smile.

“Fuck off, Eric!” Butters slammed the door to his locker, startling everyone who dared to be around him.

“Woah, calm down dude, I just wanted to give you this.” Cartman opened the box in his hands and carefully picked one of the cupcakes that had the red liner, handing it to his infuriated friend. “Might make you feel a little better.”

“Oh- huh- Really? Thanks.” Butters seemed genuinely surprised that someone, no matter who, was being nice to him. He picked up the cupcake, taking a bite out of it right away and getting some of the whipped cream on the side of his mouth. “That’s awfully nice of ya. You’re a good person, ya know, Eric. UNLIKE SOMEONE I KNOW!” He said that last part too loud, facing the corridor, as if he expected you to be around so you could hear all about how much he hated you right now. Unfortunately, you were nowhere to be found - instead, he yelled that stuff right while a group of young freshman girls happened to be passing through, laughing about something. They jumped in fear, looking at him like he was a maniac, and quickened their steps to leave as soon as possible while whispering to each other.

“Yeah, yeah, Butters, I know, I’m amazing” Eric replied, absent-mindedly, setting his sights on the end of the corridor, planning his escape route. “Look, man, I gotta go, see you in class or whatever.” Not even saying a word more than the absolutely necessary, he left Butters’ side as well, this time looking for his next objective.

Luckily, he didn’t take too long to find it as well. Right as he turned the corner, you stood next to another set of lockers, next to Red and Wendy. As they talked eagerly about something, though, you kept to your silence, also dwelling on your fight with your ex-boyfriend. You just weren’t trying to make your anger everyone else’s problem was all, but the other girls knew better than to talk about it near you or ask you questions, lest a wrong word also have you snapping.

Cartman beelined to your group, and as you all saw him coming up, the happy chatter immediately turned into silence. “Hello, ladies”, he spoke, earning a raised eyebrow from you and a questionable stare from the two other girls. “Might I interest you in some cupcakes?”

Before anyone could answer, he opened the box in his hands again, carefully picking a cupcake and handing it to every member in your trio, making sure to give you the one with the red wrap. He had made sure to bring extra cupcakes just in case anyone else in the class might see him with them or ask about it, since just giving sweet treats to you and Butters and no one else would look extremely suspicious. The red liners were to separate the laced cupcakes from the others, so he wouldn’t give them to anyone else unknowingly, and among the colorful liners in the others, no one could see you and your ex getting the same color as nothing but a funny coincidence.

As he closed the box, though, you didn’t make a single movement, still staring at him with the baked good in your hands. “No need to thank me, you know. Aren’t you going to eat it?” He asked, tilting his head to the side slightly.

Your eyes narrowed at him. “You put your dick in this thing, didn’t you?” was the question that came out of your mouth. Red let out an “Ewwwww”.

“NO! Why would you think that?” He gasped, his eyes widening in surprise, like it was an absurd thing to even think about - even though it was definitely something he was capable of doing and everyone knew that. “Who do you think I am, some kind of psychopath?”

“Yes.” Your eyes went from him to the cupcake, turning it around in your hand, analyzing it for any obvious signs of tampering. “Farted on it? Put cum on the whipped cream? Is my mom dead on the filling?”

“No, no and NO! Christ, you do something once and all of a sudden it’s all people ever talk about.” He didn’t actually expect you to start asking so many questions - who questions free food? -, so he hadn’t taken the time to build up an actual excuse. “I just had too much batter and made a few extra to bring to class, can’t a guy just be nice anymore?”

 You waited a little bit more to see if he’d say anything, if he’d give away any evil plans. Unable to figure out anything, you took the leap of faith, getting the cupcake near your mouth and slowly taking a bite of it. The taste that your tongue could pick up - plain vanilla, whipped cream, a little bit of chocolate from the sprinkles on top - was good, but nothing out of the ordinary. Well, you weren’t expecting Cartman to be some kind of superb baker, and there wasn’t anything that struck you as odd, so you continued eating. Seeing this, the girls around you followed suit with eating theirs, since if you couldn’t find anything wrong with it they probably wouldn’t either.

“See? Pretty good, isn’t it? Anyway, I’m gonna go and give the rest away, bye.” He left before you could interrogate him any further.

“What a weirdo”, stated Red. Before you could dwell on the subject more, Wendy warned both of you about the time, and your trio started making your way to class.

༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚𓆩♡𓆪༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚

For the next couple of hours, Butters felt like he was about to die.

His whole body felt hot, to the point where he was building up a slight sweat. During this time of the year and up in the mountains, this concept felt absurd, so when he asked the classmates around him to see if anyone else felt the same way, he was met with confused stares and Kenny putting the back of his hand on Butters’ forehead to check his temperature. He was warm alright, but he could tell this wasn’t a fever because this particular warmth felt more intense in the lower part of his belly, irradiating through his body.

The worst part that came with it, though, was the hard-on. It had popped up about an hour into classes, throbbing like crazy, refusing to go down and urging him to take action. He thought about asking for the hall pass to go to the bathroom and masturbate, but decided against it - because that would mean getting up in front of the whole class and standing there where everyone could see him. At this point, after so long, it all started to feel really painful, so he resorted to just curling onto himself on the chair as best as he could, waiting for the bell to ring so he could leave without drawing too much attention.

All the way across the class, you weren’t faring too well, either - just way better at hiding it. Some strands of your hair were glued to your forehead from the sweat, and you fanned yourself with an old crumbled assignment you found in the bottom of your bag. Under your table where no one could see, you pressed your thighs against each other, rubbing them together as silently as possible to create even the tiniest bit of friction to relieve yourself. As much as you did, it wasn’t nearly enough.

During this whole ordeal, you and Butters would look across the room towards each other regularly - even though you were mad at each other, you were the only person he could think about at a time like this, and vice versa. Every once in a while, your gazes would cross, both with completely panicked stares. Oh what you’d give to know what he was thinking at those times. But then, either you or him would realize the other was staring, and you’d immediately turn to the blackboard and pretend you were staring at it the whole time.

The bell ringing to announce lunchtime couldn’t have come soon enough.

“Alright class, off to lunch, we’ll-” The teacher started her usual speech to send all of you off, but before she could finish, Butters got up from his desk and bolted out of the door in extreme hurry, the speed with which he left being so intense that it knocked his whole desk back as he left and all his belongings scattered to the ground. “- Oh, I guess someone’s really into Taco Tuesday.”

As everyone got up to leave for the canteen, you thought about making a quick detour to the bathroom, maybe you could sneak in a little DJing session in one of the stalls, if you kept your quiet, just enough to get yourself through the rest of the day. Before you could make your way there, however, your girl friends made a whole group around your desk, and you had yourself cornered. If you wanted to leave anywhere, they were absolutely going to follow, so you begrudgingly walked to lunch alongside them, still trying to keep your legs as close to each other as possible. You weren’t sure if you’d even survive the rest of the day at this rate.

You hoped that lunch time and the interactions that came with it could make you distracted unlike the quiet classroom, but you were deprived of that as well. No matter how much you tried to pay attention to the conversations the girls were having around you at the table, the heat in your lower abdomen was too strong to ignore, and your thoughts always went straight back to poundtown at any given chance. More than once you had hands waved and fingers snapped near your face because someone asked you a question and you didn’t realize it. 

Also, having scanned around the room with your eyes more than a couple of times like a turret looking for a target, you couldn’t find Butters anywhere in the canteen. You wanted anything from him, even his angry looks at this point were enough to get you going - your mind got busy drawing up all those detailed scenarios where he pinned you to the table, choked you, slapped your ass, pulled your hair, all that while pounding into you violently and calling you filthy names that you never thought you’d hear from his mouth, but that made sense in your anger. 

But he wasn’t there, and you had honestly started to worry. The way he left class earlier had you wondering, who was he hanging out with that made him leave in such a hurry? Was he with some other girl? You usually trusted Butters a lot, he worshipped the ground you walked on and never gave you any reason to doubt his loyalty, but now that you had broken up, God knows what kind of shenanigans he could be up to. You certainly didn’t want to imagine the worst; not only because of the implication of betrayal on his end and the idea that he could already be loving someone else so soon, but also because it would mean he was getting a bunch of action while you couldn’t even masturbate.

“Earth to (Y/N)!” You were once again thrown out of your train of thought by Wendy Testaburger, snapping her fingers close to your ear to draw your attention once more. 

“Wait, what was it again?”, you answered, looking around with your eyes focused on the peers closest to you. All the other girls at the table were staring back, some with anger in their eyes, some with concern.

“Ugh, nevermind. I’ll text you later, since you’re too good to listen to us today.” She made a dismissing motion with her hand. “The bell’s about to ring. Let’s head back.”

As your whole group got up to leave, you looked around the considerably less crowded cafeteria one more time, hoping to catch your ex lingering around, maybe he just came late for lunch? But unfortunately, he was God knows where still. You were expecting to catch some sights of him in class again, but that was unideal - the setting there was one of silence and concentration, two things that you had no intention of keeping up with.

You didn’t have to wait until then to see him, though. As soon as your group opened the cafeteria doors, he was waiting right on the other side of it, just waiting for you to leave for the hall. Coming up from your side, he pulled on the sleeve of your blouse to draw your attention. “Canitalktoyouplease?” was the sentence that left his mouth, almost too quick and slurred for you to catch.

“Huh?”

You turned to face him and the sight was almost absurd. Butters was usually well kept, his parents weren’t going to let him get out of the house looking less than presentable, but right now he was a whole mess. His hair was all shagged up and he was panting like he had just ran a marathon. The hairs closest to his forehead were wet and some droplets of transparent liquid were around it - could be sweat, the same problem you had, or he might’ve thrown some water on his face to cool himself down (which was also a great idea). He also had his jacket tied to his waist, which was weird considering it wasn’t hot this time of the year and he had been wearing it earlier. Did he spend the whole lunch period running track?

“Can- Can I talk to you, please?” He repeated more slowly this time, gripping your arm tight and making you wince from pain. He wasn’t aware of his own strength right now. Seeing the look on your face, he quickly removed his hand from your arm, but stayed still waiting for your answer.

“She doesn’t wanna talk right now, asshole!” Before you could even say anything, Red yelled out, moving right next to you and locking her arm on yours, to show him that you weren’t alone. “And it’s almost time for class anyway. Fuck off.” 

You loved Red McArthur, you really did. That was one of your best friends right there. You didn’t regret at all having told her everything about your fight with Butters, were extremely grateful for the support she had shown you throughout, and you’d surely be glad for her intervention in any other situation. However, she was the one that should be thankful right now - thankful that the knives in the school cafeteria were dull, otherwise you’d have picked up one and stabbed her on the spot. You and your ex were still in a rift, sure, but he was the person you wanted to talk to the most right now and she was denying you that. Even if unknowingly, she was currently being the ultimate cockblocker, or pussy-blocker?

You took a deep breath, something that the other girls probably took as an attempt to dial down your anger at Butters, but that was in reality so you wouldn’t yell at your best friend in front of everyone else. “It’s alright, Red. Go on without me, we won’t take long.” You spoke as calmly as you could, waving them away with your hand and taking your arm away from hers.

As soon as you did so, Butters took you by the wrist and started to power walk in a completely different direction from everyone else, and you had a hard time matching his footsteps while trying not to bump into the groups of students everywhere. You wondered where the hell he was even taking you in such a hurry. For a while, he also seemed confused - he looked towards every door as you went, as if searching for something himself -, but then he made a decision, taking you up two sets of stairs to the third floor of the school building, where he surprised you again by pulling you inside the handicapped restroom.

Unlike the other toilets in the school, the ones reserved for handicapped people were single-user, and since there weren’t many disabled students that were willing to go all the way to the third floor to pee, this one was actually always seen to be in great condition. It was quite spacious to make it easy to maneuver wheelchairs, and also away from many of the actual occupied classrooms. Whatever it was that Butters wanted to discuss with you, he clearly didn’t want anyone else listening.

While he turned to lock the door, you took a few small steps towards the other side of the restroom, standing in the middle of it. You crossed your arms and straightened your posture, trying to look as stiff and unsympathetic as possible. Maybe it was overkill, you had agreed to be here so that already sent the message that you were at least willing to listen, but you didn’t want him to think for a second that he still had your heart on a chokehold like he did.

He took a deep breath as he turned to face you, as if trying to collect his thoughts. “Look, I know you’re mad at me and I’m mad at you and you prolly don’t wanna see me none, but I have no one else to turn to! I need your help!” He blurted out, his arms in front of him like he was ready to push you back if you were to become aggressive.

You frowned. “YOU need MY help? With what?” 

“I… I can’t say it, okay?” He was fighting with his thoughts now, knowing that he’d need to speak up, but couldn’t bring himself to. “It’s a heck of a thing and I can’t really explain it and I don’t even know if it can be explained-”

“Stop with the rambling!” You stomped your foot on the ground to alert him. “Either you tell me what this is about or I’m leaving!”

At this moment, he averted his eyes to the ground, avoiding your gaze as if that would conceal his feelings of absolute shame. His hands moved to his waist, untying his jacket and letting it fall to the floor, and the reason why he wasn’t wearing it immediately became clear - he had a noticeable tent in the front of his pants, which the sleeves of the jacket previously hung in front of, covering the view. 

As soon as you saw, it took you every little bit of restraint you had not to immediately drop to your knees, free his dick of its confinements and take it in your mouth to suck him dry. You felt your saliva building up, ready to make it as sloppy as possible too. But it would mean a complete lack of self-respect on your part to give in without at least him properly asking for it (you could faintly hear the voice of Red in your head scolding you for that), and you also needed to negotiate your own release, so you just swallowed it all back and waited as he built up the courage to continue talking.

“I tried jacking off in the stalls, watching porn on my phone, heck, even meditating to make it go away… It’s not enough. Nothing is. I NEED YOU.” He grabbed both your wrists with his hands and stared deep into your eyes as he pleaded. “I’ll do anything you want if you help me. If you never wanna see me again, I’ll leave! Forever! Just please help me! I can’t stand this anymore!”

You were far from wanting him to leave forever, not when he begged like this, looking like a hungry lost puppy. The poor man was so overwhelmed by his own arousal that he couldn’t notice the fact that you had taken a few steps towards him to close the distance between you instead of widening it. “Anything?” You murmured, to which he nodded vigorously. 

You wriggled your wrists out of his hold and took his hand in yours, guiding it towards your crotch. Your other hand quickly opened the buttons and zipper in your pants, and you pulled it down just a little, just barely halfway down your butt. The wetness between your legs had created a damp spot in your panties, and when you guided Butters’ hand to feel it, the mere brush of his hand over your extremely sensitive area was enough to make your breath hitch even through the fabric. He noticed it immediately, and you saw his eyes widen. “I believe we can help each other.”

He needed no more explanation, maybe due to fear that talking any longer would make you change your mind. So he quickly clashed his mouth onto yours, needy and desperate, wrapping both his arms around you with unusual strength - whatever it is that was driving him mad was also making him act differently than what you’re used to, but you were here for it. As you kissed him back, you felt his usually soft lips to be slightly raw - he had probably been biting them in his anxiety earlier. You didn’t have a second to dwell on it, though, because his tongue swiftly started to brush over yours, an invitation for a dance that you gladly accepted.

Still completely glued to your mouth, Butters started to take small steps, which made you walk backwards, all the way to the other side of the restroom. As your back touched the wall, you felt one of the horizontal metal grab rails under you. You shifted so more of your ass was on top of it, not completely seated (the bar was too narrow for it), but just giving you the extra support in case you needed it. The current position had you firm on your right foot, while the other hovered slightly above ground. Your legs being more open also allowed for Butters to get even closer with his hips, his erection so close to your pussy, separated only by the clothes you both wore.

In one swift motion, Butters hiked up both your blouse and your bra, not even caring about the back clasps, taking everything off and exposing your breasts to the slightly cold air of the restroom as well as to his hungry gaze. The latter wasn’t true for much long, though - he closed his eyes and dove immediately with his mouth to your left nipple, sucking on it and flicking the hardened bud with the tip of his tongue, while his right hand took care of the other breast, massaging it softly. Your nipples were already sensitive by nature, but right now they felt connected to all other nerves in your body, and the stimulation had you whimpering in pleasure.

Your lover started to alternate between one breast and the other with his mouth, giving both the same amount of love and attention - wherever his mouth wasn’t, one of his hands was sure to be, kneading the soft flesh and flicking your peaks slightly. The other hand would then be running around your chest, arms and belly, feeling your soft skin and making up for lost time. 

On your end, one of your hands grabbed hard on the metal rail below you, even if that wouldn’t do you much to make you stable. The other ran through Butters’ hair, caressing it - a type of caring behavior that almost felt out of place considering the borderline sinful thoughts you had all day and the situation you found yourself in right now, but that was doing wonders for him, since it made him even more eager to keep loving on your tits.

You could also feel his hips rutting towards plain air near you, as he tried to satiate his throbbing dick even a little bit. Not wanting to deny him any part of this experience when he was treating you so right, you moved one of your legs closer to him, putting your knee between his legs and allowing him to grind on your thigh. He took the offer immediately and responded by growling against your breast and sending some more shivers through your body with the vibrations.

The new stimulus had Butters going wild. He was getting more feral with his treatment of your body - taking your nipples between his fingers, tugging at them and twisting slightly. He started to graze your bud with his teeth, which soon turned into full-on love bites all across your nipples and breasts, the red patches not looking so jarring now that your whole skin was so flushed, but they’d certainly be a nice keepsake later.

When you started to feel that familiar tension in your muscles, the pleasure in your nipples spreading like a flame under your skin, it came as a surprise. You hadn’t ever climaxed from just him working your nipples before - hell, was that even possible? -, and it had sneaked up on you, first feeling like if lightning was gentle, an electric tingle all over your body that sparked like fireworks. Then there was no denying the well-known wave of pleasure that hit you like a tsunami, crashing your whole world around you and making your knees buckle. 

Sensing your loss of balance in front of him, Butters quickly let go of your breasts and wrapped his arms around your waist. You wouldn’t have fallen either way, catching yourself in the metal bar behind you with a firm grip, but the consideration was appreciated. As he looked at you with a worried expression and breathing through his mouth anxiously, you felt the walls of your pussy spasming again and more slick dripping in your panties. 

“You okay?” His eyes ran through your body, looking for anything that might be wrong, and coming up short. You were absolutely perfect as always.

“More than.” You purred with a smile, giving him a brief kiss. When your mouths parted ways, he tilted his head closer to yours ever so slightly, almost as if chasing your lips with his. Savoring his yearning, you pucker up your lips and make a kissing sound, before tugging at his shirt. “You’re gonna kill me like this though. Just let me feel you already.”

It was his time to smile. “Okay, honey”, he hummed, fixing his posture - and you closed your eyes happily, not having noted how much you missed him calling you pet names until now. He locked mouths with you again and his hands drifted down between you two, pulling further down the hem of your jeans and tracing your slit through the soaked panties, earning from you a sharp moan.

His mouth left yours so he could focus on ridding you of the rest of your outfit, and you held down on the grab rail with your other hand as he lifted your legs – first one, then the other so you could keep stability - to remove your shoes, pants and undergarments completely. You would’ve helped him to make the job quicker, but he seemed to be enjoying the ride now that he had you back in his embrace. Once he had fully taken everything off, he planted a quick kiss on the inside of your lifted thigh, making you shudder.

Slowly and carefully letting go of your leg, Butters took another look at your full body as you stood there naked for him. He wanted to kiss every inch of you, show you as much of his love as possible, but there was also this overpowering lust. Not wanting to spend another second more not touching you, he made quick work of his own pants and boxers while you grabbed onto his shirt and pulled it over his head, throwing it somewhere and allowing his bare chest to touch yours. You were both drenched in sweat at this point, and your naked bodies basically glued together like that, but in the haze none of that mattered.

Butters lifted your left leg up again and held your thigh firmly against his hip with his right arm, while his other hand stroked his shaft slowly as he moved to position it against your entrance. You felt your cunt clench tight as the head of his cock breached your folds, and you were sure he could feel it too, as his breath hitched and his eyes fluttered when you tried to look at them. “Need me that bad, huh?”, he murmured, giving you a kiss on the cheek. “I need you too, honey. Can’t be without you no more.”

With that, he thrusted into you in one swift motion - your surreal wetness making it easy for him to bottom out several inches deep inside of you, the familiar sting you felt as he stretched you being eased by how aroused you already were. The both of you moaned almost in unison at this very welcomed sensation, and in a moment of pseudo-clarity you remembered that you couldn’t be loud like this, a realization that did not seem to grace Butters as he started to push out and back into you with more fully open-mouthed moans. You quickly put one of your hands in the back of his head and push it towards the crook of your neck, where he starts to place quick but strong suckles and bites, not caring for - actually downright wanting - the marks they’d leave.

“Shh, honey” You whispered with the softest of voices, not wanting him to get discouraged, but still needing to give him a reminder. “Can’t get loud in here or they’ll catch us. Just do this for me, okay?” 

It was hard for you to heed your own warning, though - with each quick and hard slam of his hips, plus his assault on your neck, you wanted nothing more than to have him hear just how good he was doing. You settle for biting your own lip and keeping your moans in your mouth, which to him seemed to sound even hotter - as he sped up the pace of his thrusts with newfound energy, getting high on the sound of your muffled whimpers and the wet sound of his dick plunging inside your weeping cunt.

The force with which his hips struck your body had you sliding up and down against the wall, your tits bouncing with the movement. His hot breath on your neck made the fine hairs on your whole body stand up, and your back arched, which made him hit that sweet spot inside of you even more perfectly now. Needing to be closer, closer, you let your hands go from the grab rails where they had settled before and wrap your arms around Butters’ neck, relying on him like your last connection to the Earth now. You were glad he had enough strength to hold you with just the lower half of your body pinned to the cold bathroom tiles while still jackhammering into you.

As Butters raised his head from your neck to take a brief look at you through his half-lidded eyes, he used a lot of self-restraint to not cum on the spot. You were a whole mess: disheveled hair, face moist with sweat, a soft reddish tint spread through your whole body, but more prominent on your cheeks, nose, and breasts. You weren’t staring back at him, eyes tight shut as the feeling of his cock inside of you distracted you from using any of your other senses. He wanted to kiss your rosy puffy lips again, but wouldn’t risk disturbing the pretty noises that came out of your throat as you tried so hard to not let out the loud moans you wanted to. “Yeah, that’s it, baby... You’re so… good to me...” He laid his head back on the crook of your neck, but didn’t go back to biting - instead, he inhaled deeply, taking all of your scent in, your faint perfume that he loved mixed with your sweat and… a hint of vanilla? “Lemme make you… feel even better…” 

His last sentence slurred into nonsense, but in the blur you barely registered it. You also didn’t even notice how he sneaked his left hand between your bodies, coating his thumb with the splattered juices around your cunt before moving it up and rubbing quick circles in your clit, increasing your pleasure in an almost overwhelming way. You felt a sharp sting in your lip and a metallic taste - in your efforts to not make any noise, you had bitten your lip so hard it broke skin. The pain, however, was quickly overshadowed by Butters’ ministrations, and you slapped one of your hands over your mouth to silence yourself, leaning with your back against the wall again.

It wasn’t like any past fuck you ever had. Everything was heightened; You heard every slap of his skin against yours and all the little sharp breaths both of you took as you tried to avoid being too loud in your pleasure, you could feel every single vein in his cock squeezing through your tight walls, and you saw whole galaxies even through your closed eyes. 

As that coil inside of your belly was getting tighter and tighter, so were your walls against Butters’ cock - and you knew that had to be catching up to him, as he started to lose the pace on his thrusts, and the muscle in his arms and legs seemed to become even more tense. “‘m- I- can’t hold much longer like this, sweets!” It seemed almost impossible for him to get the words out, having to say them through quick breaths as he got close to his release himself. “You’re just… too good…”

Then there was no warning as he let out a loud growl and his hips hit your body with one final deep slam, and you felt his dick pulsating as he filled the deepest part of you with his hot seed. The thumb in his left hand, however, still flicked your clit viciously, and so it didn’t take much longer for you to come undone, your cunt gripping his throbbing dick as the pleasure washed over your body for a second time.

As both of you dissolved into each other’s bodies, you found it in yourself to take his face in your shaky hands and press his lips to yours once more. Unlike your previous kisses of today, though, this moment was much more kind and full of tenderness, feeling exactly like the ones you shared throughout your relationship with him. You both felt loved and cared for, and while that rough fuck session took care of the needs of your physical bodies, the kiss took care of your souls.

You only dared part your mouths this time when it became necessary to breathe, and both of you sported soft smiles after you did, tired, but happy. You started using one of your hands to brush back through your fingers the multiple small strands of hair glued to his forehead, while the other caressed his cheek. He leaned into your touch, resting his hands on your waist. His dick was softening, but he didn’t feel keen on pulling out just yet, relishing the closeness of your bodies like this.

“I love you, Leo.” You finally broke the ice after a couple of minutes like this, giving him a peck on the forehead, to draw his attention back to Earth.

“Geez, by now I sure hope so!” You couldn’t help but giggle at his ever present sincerity. “I love you too, (Y/N).”

As you smiled and took note of your actual environment for the first time in a while, an idea came to mind. “Wanna get away from here?” You already knew what his answer would be to this offer, but you wanted to make your intentions clear nonetheless. “We can find someplace else where we can make some real noise.”

༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚𓆩♡𓆪༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚

You and Butters didn’t come back for the rest of classes, and nobody in school had an answer to where you were, either. All texts sent to you or him went unanswered for that day, and your friends had no idea what happened.

What they could certainly say they saw, though, was the pair of you arriving at school together the next morning with a pep in both your steps, chatting away and smiling as you held hands. Everyone was left speechless, and some even questioned if the last few days had even been real. 

The only person who didn’t seem confused was Eric Cartman, his nonchalant behavior earning him plenty of questioning from the other dudes the following days, but he refused to admit to anything. And why would he, anyway? You and his friend were back together, happy as could be, the sun was up in the sky, everything was right. And, if it ever stopped being that way, he had a certain tiny bottle in the back of his wardrobe to sort things out again.

Dividers by @cafekitsune

[oakenshieldbaggins]

xedgin fic rec list

so because i binge read a ton of fics these last two months, i thought why not make a rec list if it can help people find out great fics.

i just wanted to say i came across so many good fics, like comparing to other fandoms i find the overall quality to be quite high. so what i'm trying to say is you guys are really talented and we're lucky to have you in this fandom. and thank you for sharing your work.

now the recs:

Post-Movie:

Three words everybody knows by violet_pencil

Speaking the words of an oath isn't what makes you a good paladin, and knowing how to tell lies is only part of what makes a great con man. Where do they find common ground? Well, turns out they both know how to commit to the bit.

Sunlight is a Kind of Burning by letmetellyouaboutmyfeels

Ed's excited to get his life back on track in the wake of saving Neverwinter. He's less excited at how a certain paladin keeps popping up everywhere he goes. Except for how he's starting to miss the guy when he's not around. Yeah, let's not think about that too hard.

a ballad from a reverie by forsworn

On a cold evening, the party stop to drink at a crowded tavern. Xenk tries to ignore the way his chest tightens when Edgin squeezes close to him. But that gets much harder when the tavern's bard starts singing a love song. About a paladin. And Edgin seems to recognise it…

tys hard to be a seinte in the cytie by indigostohelit

“The Material Planes are not realms of punishment,” said Xenk. “The gods no more deny us the warmth of physical pleasure than they would the warmth of the sun. They only warn us, through each, of the dangers that lie in excess.” “…Huh,” said Ed again, and, lacking further retort, grabbed up the new tankard and swigged deeply. Then he spat it across the bar. “This is water, though,” said Xenk peacefully. “You are going to have a hangover in the morning.”

Universal Glue by Korwwa

Edgin and Xenk get stuck in a glue trap. The close-quarters situation forces Edgin to decide if succumbing to the charms of certain overpowered paladin is more likely to ruin, or elevate, the plan of his life.

Polyphonic by Geese_In_Flight

Ed can’t stand Xenk. Xenk keeps showing up anyway. It’s not entirely clear how that became everyone else’s problem.

Muses lost and found anew by Mikhail

Edgin Darvis never considered himself to be a hero. Of course, he was full of dreams and ideals back when he was still young. He wanted to save the world. But the world, as it turned out, didn’t really want to be saved. Instead, it barged into Edgin’s life uninvited and made him a widower, a thief, and an escaped convict. As he was looking back at his life and naivete, he couldn’t feel but contempt and bitterness. That is until he crossed paths with Xenk Yendar, a paladin whose sword was only nearly as strong as his righteousness. Confronted with Xenk’s tragic past, the bard realized they were both touched by the same evil. Before he could dwell on some uncomfortable truths, however, Xenk disappeared from his life just as suddenly as he first appeared. When they meet for the second time, it’s clear the two of them have much more in common than they first thought. Well, it’s clear to everyone except for them. The question is, are they going to realize this before it’s too late?

in the absence of truth by floralprintshark

Five times Ed says that he hates Xenk and one time he doesn't.

Perception Check (Roll for Romance) by kaydeefalls

"I bet Xenk fucks like a metronome, too. You know." Holga makes a highly suggestive, repetitive gesture. "In, out. In, out. No variation. Same exact rhythm every time. Boring." Edgin stares at her, torn between horror and fascination. "You've really thought about this, huh?" (So has he. Unfortunately.)

give me two damn minutes (and I'll be fine) by PH03N1X_360

Xenk Yendar is a hero. It’s his job, his identity, his [life]. It comes as easily as breathing. Saving children, fighting hordes of undead, it’s always come naturally to him. As each new challenge arises, people look to him to protect them. The warmth of their gazes never fail to fill him with pride. No matter how many scars he acquires, how many nights the horrors of his past rouse him from sleep, or how many people he fails to save in the process, it is always worth the price. Yet sometimes, when the darkness around him feels too oppressive and tight bandages make his bones ache, he wonders how much more he can take before he cracks under the pressure. Or: Xenk sees the Beckoning Death spell from afar. Even upon realizing the party took care of it, it still fucks him over severely... not that he would show it. Edgin knows a mask when he sees one.

Falling For The First Time by Powderpuff

In retrospect, falling in love with Edgin was inevitable. There was no recourse for Xenk; no guild nor court to appeal to, and even Ilmater could not return his property to him, nor Ed himself; for you cannot return something you do not know you have.

O happy dagger! This is thy sheath by Kabbal (Aledane)

"Ed wants to bash his face in with his lute, just to shatter that perfect, flawless skin, see if there’s flesh and blood running under that pristine marble. He wants to flee to the end of the world, to never be reminded of the existence of a being who seems to never have failed at anything, ever. He also wants to crush his lips against his, cling to that steady neck and feel the weight of all that perfection over him, spearing him like it could make him holy‒ Hm. Strange thought to have. Let’s forget it ever existed."

Affection and Love by AkataLily

Edgin is affectionate towards Xenk. Not love, affectionate, because those are two very different things! Xenk is oblivious and uninterested, that is, until Edgin fucks up and the cat is suddenly out of the bag. Things get akward, then they get complicated, but eventually, we all have to admit what goes on in our hearts.

Winning Prizes for Rotten Judgment by letmetellyouaboutmyfeels

In which Ed admits he's in love with Xenk, woos Xenk, and sleeps with Xenk, all in completely the wrong order. To be fair, it's only half his fault.

keystone by weatheredlaw

key·stone noun | a central stone at the summit of an arch, locking the pieces together. or: edgin dies, but there's magic for that. holga and xenk make good on a thirty-five year old favor to bring him back from the other side.

So Deep As the Love I'm In by Geese_In_Flight

Holga takes a step forward and claps Ed on the shoulder sympathetically, which is a terrible sign. “Swept you right off your feet, did he?” she asks, with a grin. Five times Xenk courted Ed, and one time Ed decided to take matters into his own hands.

the weight of fingers pressing deep by forsworn

When Xenk slips his fingers into Edgin's mouth during sex, they're both surprised by how good it feels.

you'll find us in the meadowland by audenrain

He was standing at Xenk’s desk, tucked into the corner and lined by shelves stacked with holy texts. Not his most valuable, of course - he wouldn’t be so careless as to keep the most precious of his collection here - but any one of them would feed a hungry man for a few days, at least. And yet this man wasn’t hungry, and he was no ordinary thief. Xenk judged this not only by the strong slope of his shoulders and broad back and the fine weave of his coat but also by the fact that he had recently been awarded the highest honours the Lord of Neverwinter could bestow. No, Edgin could want for nothing; even he could not have spent his rewards so quickly. There was only one explanation. This was an affliction of the soul.

To Touch The Divine by New1Romantic

Xenk asks for Edgin's help to retrieve an evil artefact from a cult. The fact that the cult is definitely just a front for the elite of Waterdeep to have kinky sex is, presumably, just happenstance.

Freely given (Wanted) by sb_essebi

Ed can’t. He can’t anymore. Can’t take the fervour in Xenk’s words, the shine in his eyes, the way the light of the sunset plays across his skin. He’s just so beautiful at sunset, Xenk. He is. To the point of unfairness, to the point it makes Ed almost angry, makes him want to cry, to scream. Ed kisses him. Or: Ed steals a kiss. Xenk shows him why he needn't have.

Edgin Needs to Get Laid and Edgin Gets Laid by Isoltan

There was a pause. "And that's when you started the one night stands," Holga said, only a hint of a question in her voice. Xenk raised his tankard in her direction and took a long swig. "You have sexual desire?" Simon asked. Doric turned to him and exploded, "Jesus, do you ever think before you speak?" "Tell the truth, you thought he was celibate too. Edgin sure did!" Simon said, gesturing to Edgin. "Hey, leave me out of this," Edgin said. "Exactly!" Simon continued. "Tell me, out of the two of them, you'd have pegged Edgin as the celibate and XENK as the whore!" -----------‐ Very loose f*ck-or-die fic. Basically, Edgin's magic needs to improve and the group decides he needs to get laid. But he reveals he's demi and can only be intimate with people he trusts. This was meant to be a one-off but I got caught up with the group's banter.

this distance between us by forsworn

Xenk and Edgin have to share a bed. It’s not even a big bed. The perfect time for Xenk to have a nightmare…

Origin Point series by Neyiea

“It wasn’t a risk. I knew that if I jumped you would catch me.” Xenk’s pinched expression becomes thoughtful, then turns serious. “I see,” he intones solemnly. “I am honored to have earned your trust.”

close to the skin by forsworn

Edgin's going undercover; Xenk's determined to make him look respectable. But Edgin finds submitting to a flat-razor shaving at those steady hands to be far more intense than he expected.

Solitary Burdens by cupiscent

Edgin's wife died years ago, but he's only just now letting go. He can't talk about it with any of the others, but Xenk - aggravatingly - understands. Perhaps neither of them need to carry these burdens alone.

in for a silver by weatheredlaw

Edgin was, at the very least, two things: a great kisser, and a phenomenal liar. or: xenk gets hit by something weird in the jungle. edgin lends a hand.

Canon Divergence (happens during the movie):

We Are So (Not) Breaking Up by murdertrashbabyrat

Edgin isn’t mad because of the idea of a kind Thayan, he’s mad because it’s Xenk Yendar his lightly insufferable not-ex. They didn’t break up because they were never together thank you very much Holga, so Xenk is his…his something that isn’t his anymore. It’s fine he’s not dwelling on it he has to get his wife back and stop thinking about the man he’s been sharing a bed with for years. Denial is a hell of a drug OR they are exes when they meet up again in the movie

AUs:

A Cherry When It's Blooming by Geese_In_Flight

Lord Yendar, once a paladin of Ilmater, has been called back to Waterdeep in the aftermath of his father’s death. Upon his arrival, he discovers he must reckon with an untrustworthy executor, an estate in shambles, and a wholly unexpected stipulation in his father’s will. Edgin Darvis is trying to find the one big score that will let him build back a life that went off the rails years ago. When he hears the rumors that a young and inexperienced Lord Yendar has come back to town, he knows just what he has to do.

Romance in the time of LoveChat by cicia3

What's worse than being a loser writer reduced to releasing third-rate romance novels for Forge Publishing? Being an uninspired writer with three months' back rent to pay. Driven by desperation, Edgin, a single father who's also perhaps juuust a tad too much anchored in the past, signs up on the nation's largest dating site. The goal? To find a character unique enough to inspire him for his new novel. And then Xenk Yendar shows up.

[baileypie-writes]

Hey pookie it's me and what about veneer x male reader where reader is just overworking and doesn't know when to stop working with readers job can you make him a drafter pwetty pwease🥺

(I'm sorry for all the veneer requests I'm getting destroyed by work and I'm starved of veneer comfort)

A/N ~ Sure pookie! I don’t mind the requests at all, so send as many as you’d like! I also don’t know much about being a drafter, so I’m sorry if anything’s inaccurate!🩷

~Time to Stop~

Veneer x Male!Overworking!Drafter!Reader

Fandom: Trolls 3: Band Together

Relationship: Romantic

Synopsis: You’ve been overworking yourself, and Veneer’s not having it.

Warnings: Reader overworking himself, Veneer lecturing Reader

“Just finish this drawing, and then you can rest.”

That’s what you’ve told yourself six times. So obviously, you haven’t gotten your rest yet. You don’t know why you have so much trouble stopping. You just feel the need to constantly be working. You’ve been working nonstop for almost three days, and your wrist was killing you. Not to mention, you’re absolutely exhausted. But you won’t stop.

~~~~

“Why won’t he pick up? Do you think he’s okay?” Veneer asked his sister. He’s tried calling you seven times already, and you haven’t answered. He was getting really worried, and starting to pace.

“Veneer, for like, the millionth time, I do not know! If you’re so concerned, just go visit him.” Velvet responded, just wanting her brother to leave her alone.

“You know what, I will!” His mood changed to a more happy one, excited to see you. He grabbed his car keys, and drove to your work.

~~~~

The moment Veneer arrived, he was frantically searching for you. When he finally found you, he called out your name, causing you to jump. He ran into your arms. “You’re okay!”

“Uh… yeah? Oh course I’m okay, why wouldn’t I be?” You asked, puzzled.

Veneer pulled away. “Because you haven’t answered any of my calls! I’ve tried calling you so many times!”

You were slightly shocked and confused, so you pulled your phone out of your bag. Seven missed calls. “Oh…. sorry. I guess I was so busy, I didn’t notice.”

Veneer scoffed, his lips forming into a pout. “Yeah. Of course you were busy. You’ve been busy for the past three days! I haven’t even seen your face until now! Why even are you so busy? Is it your boss? I can talk to them if they’re making you work too hard!”

“Oh, no, that’s okay! It’s not my boss. I guess one day I just… kept going and never stopped.”

Veneer didn’t quite understand what you meant. He glanced over at your desk, looking at the many papers, supplies and your cluttered computed screen.

“Why? You look so tired, so why haven’t you stopped?” He asked, genuinely confused.

“I don’t know. I just get like this sometimes. I start working, and I don’t let myself stop.” You sat on your chair, taking a much needed rest. You looked sleep deprived and malnourished, and Veneer did not like it.

“Babe, that not okay. You need to stop working.”

“I know… but I just want to finish this one-“

“No (name). It’s time to stop. Right now.” Veneer pulled you out of your chair, and grabbed your bag for you. You were going to protest some more, but he had this strict and determined look that made you cave.

“Fine.” Veneer smiled, and you both went to his car. You didn’t realize how tired you really were, until you fell asleep in the passenger’s seat.

Veneer promised himself that he’d never let you overwork yourself again.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

~~baileypie-writes

[amnevitahwritesstuff]

The Pretty Woman AU no one asked for.

Fandom: A Court of Thorns and Roses

Pairing: Feyre/Rhysand

Rating: Explicit

Triggers: Prostitution, Older Man/Younger Woman

Chapters: 2, 3, 4, 5 (WIP)

AO3 Link

For @whatishowedyouinthedark because she wondered when we were going to get a Pretty Woman AU. Well, my dear, that day is today.

• $ • $ • $ • $ • $ • $ • $ • $ • $ • $ • $ • $ •

Chapter One

If I Got Me a Wealthy Man

Feyre tried not to let the dread and panic choke her as she walked down the street.

Everything had been fine until that text. The one from her landlord informing her that no, she could not extend her late payment any later, and yes, she would be facing eviction if she didn’t cough up the now three thousand dollars she owed for both this month’s and last month’s rent.

And, at any other time, this might’ve been doable. Difficult, but doable. Normally her sisters were there to help pay their fair share of the rent and cover for each other any time one of them was a little short. But now that Elain had moved out to live with her boyfriend, and Nesta had disappeared to lord knew where again, their little sister had suddenly found herself on the hook to cover everything herself.

And she was struggling.

She was already working two jobs and even then she was just barely getting by. Even if she managed to fit in a third job somehow and started today, by the time she received her first paycheck she would’ve already been booted onto the streets.

How did one even make that kind of money in a few days? Become a hit man? Did she need to become John Wick for a night? She briefly considered drug dealing…until she realized that she didn’t actually know any illegal drug suppliers. Which was, you know, probably important.

She ended up going with the next best (and illegal) thing.

Which was how she ended up here, on the street corner on the bad side of town, wearing the shortest, sluttiest thing she could find in Nesta’s closet. After all, how difficult could it be for a nineteen year old to find some horny old men to pay her for sex?

Rather difficult it turned out.

Three hours in and she was now beginning to regret her hasty decision. Three hours and she hadn’t seen a single man wander past and give her so much as a creepy stare. Instead, she’d had the local corner shop owner ask her four times in the last hour if she wanted to come inside.

“You look cold dear,” the woman insisted for the fifth time as she closed up shop for the night. Feyre suppressed a shiver as the early spring air gusted over her bare legs.

“I’m alright,” she said while trying not to let her teeth chatter. That probably would’ve been a dead giveaway that she was not, in fact, alright. God, why hadn’t she thought to bring a coat?

Because coats hide the goods, that infuriatingly rational part of her brain supplied.

Not that anyone besides Mrs. Nosy had seen the goods the entire time she’s been out here.

“It’s fine,” Feyre continued. “Really. I’m just waiting for a friend.”

This might’ve been convincing if it hadn’t been the exact same story she’d given this woman every time she’d asked. Said woman looked at her disapprovingly, but seemed to sense she wouldn’t be winning this battle and so left with a parting, “If you say so dear.”

Forty-five minutes later, Feyre wondered where she’d gone wrong in her life. If it hadn’t been apparent before that she was ill-dressed for the weather, then it certainly was now that the sun had set. It had to be near freezing.

And still she hadn’t seen hide or hair of a single horny man ready to throw money at her. She’d barely seen anyone out here really, save for passing cars and the odd homeless person muttering to themselves. God, had she picked the wrong day or something? Did she miss the memo? Was there a prostitute group chat she wasn’t a part of that told everyone which street corner was the busiest? Did prostitutes even have group chats?

These were the questions she was asking herself when he appeared.

“Excuse me, do you know the way to the Four Seasons?”

Feyre startled.

A man had joined her under the flickering street light. A man who was talking to her. And asking for directions.

A handsome man.

…Maybe even too handsome.

“Oh, umm…” she blinked at him stupidly.

“I’m sorry to ask, but I seem to be a bit lost. I swear I was downtown an hour ago but now I’m not really sure how I ended up here. I’d just call an Uber but unfortunately I left my phone at the hotel so…” He smiled at her sheepishly as if to say, ‘what can you do?’.

Feyre studied him thoughtfully. He was tall and impeccably dressed. He certainly looked like someone who could afford to stay at the Four Seasons so that part of his story was likely true.

Which also meant…the wheels started turning in her head.

“…And what’s that worth to you?”

It was cruel. Normally Feyre would’ve just walked the poor man to his hotel herself or offered for him to use her phone….but she was desperate. And from the looks of his shiny shoes and expensive peacoat…he could afford it.

The man looked at her then. Really looked at her, with her ill-fitting cheap dress and haphazard attempt at gaudy makeup…and something suddenly seemed to click in his brain.

“I see.” And he did. His entire demeanor had changed. Where once he had seen a young college student who could give him directions now he clearly saw her for what she truly was.

A whore.

Even if only for the night.

“Do you?” Feyre lowered her voice as she straightened her spine a little. Anything to make herself appear older. Sultry. Unconcerned. As if she weren’t about to be homeless in five fucking days.

“How much do you charge?”

The question caught her completely off guard when it absolutely shouldn’t have. This was exactly why she was here. And yet, when actually faced down with a living, breathing man ready to pay for her services she couldn’t think of a single fucking number. What did sex workers usually charge? It’s not like she knew a lot of prostitutes she could ask. And what if this was the only man she managed to snag in the next five days? She needed to get as much out of him as she could. She needed…she needed…

“Three-thousand dollars.”

As soon as the words were out of her mouth she desperately wanted to take them back. Was she fucking insane? Nobody was going to pay three-thousand dollars for her!

“Three-thousand,” the man repeated. His face was infuriatingly blank. Was he angry? Upset? Convinced this was all a joke?

“Yep,” Feyre confirmed, figuring she was already in too deep. Might as well commit.

After all, the worst thing he could say was no…and then she would have to go ask that nice homeless man who’d been circling the block for tips on how best to survive on the streets.

“Per?”

She blinked. “…Purr?”

Like…like a cat? Was that something he was into? Was he seriously asking if she would be willing to purr in his lap like a kitten for three grand? Because if so, the answer was definitely-

“Per hour? Per night? Per week?” The man clarified, face still blank.

“Oh…” She suddenly wished lightning would strike her dead right then and there. “Umm, per night?” It came off as a question even though she hadn’t meant it to.

“Three-thousand dollars for the entire night.”

Feyre was deeply annoyed by his ability to make his questions not sound like questions. As if question marks didn’t even exist in his vocabulary.

“That’s…what I said.”

Maybe she needed to revisit the drug dealing idea again. Surely that was easier than standing in front of this stranger and negotiating her worth like she’d never done it before. Which…she hadn’t. But still.   

He stared at her for a moment with those intense dark eyes of his. She couldn’t really tell under the flickering light, but she thought they looked almost…purple? Violet maybe? Which was stupid because neither of those were actually a real eye color.

“Tell you what,” the man said pulling his hands out of his pockets. In his right he held a leather wallet that looked as if it were brand new. He plucked several bills out and held them out to her. Her heart stuttered when she saw the number 100 on each of them. “I’m afraid I don’t have three thousand dollars on me at the moment, but I do back at my hotel. I’ll give you five-hundred now if you agree to take me there and the rest when we get back to my rooms. Do we have a deal?”

Feyre felt faint.

She hadn’t actually believed he’d give her three-thousand dollars! That was just…a Hail Mary! A dumb, impulsive shout into the void!

“Just to get you back to your hotel?” She asked, eyeing the bills greedily.

“Just to get me back to my hotel,” he confirmed.

She took the money.

• $ • $ • $ • $ • $ • $ • $ • $ • $ • $ • $ • $ •

As they made their way downtown, Feyre thanked her past self for having the foresight to wear her ratty converse instead of squeezing her feet into Nesta’s too-small heels. Not exactly the sexiest shoes ever, but they were saving her from the blisters she likely would’ve had by now after walking the last six blocks so she wasn’t about to complain. And it wasn’t like men were going to be staring at her feet all that much anyway. Or, at least, that’s what she had assumed.

Because he was staring at them.

She’d caught her strange companion (Rhys, he had introduced himself as shortly after she’d snatched the money out of his hand) staring at her shoes at least three times now. If she were anywhere else, doing anything else she might’ve confronted him about it, but he had also just paid her five-hundred dollars and was planning to pay her another two and a half grand more once she got his ass back to his ritzy hotel so she was willing to bite her tongue.

“Are you sure you don’t want to borrow my coat?” He asked her for the second time in the last twenty minutes.

And even though she was freezing her tits off she was just stubborn enough to give him the same answer she had last time.

“I’m sure.”

He kept doing that. Offering her things. Asking her questions. Normal questions. Like how old she was and how long she’d lived here.

It was kind of freaking her out.

She had lied of course. She couldn’t exactly have some strange man knowing who she was or where she lived. This was only temporary after all. What would Nesta think if she knew her baby sister had dressed up like a hooker and propositioned a man on the street corner? What would Elain think? No, better none of this got back to them. Better she got her money from him as soon as she deposited him at his destination and then went home and forgot all about this hare-brained adventure of hers.

Thankfully they wouldn’t have to travel much further. The buildings had gone from old and neglected to shiny and new rather quickly. Once upon a time Feyre used to come here often to visit her father in his swanky office in the financial district, but those days had come to a very sudden close after the market crash. Now she was lucky to come here whenever her job at the local bistro needed extra help on the weekends.

She spied a passerbyer give her a judgmental look as if to illustrate just how much she no longer fit in here anymore. Or, you know, it was probably the skimpy dress she was wearing in freezing temperatures. Who could say really?

The entrance to the Four Seasons wasn’t all that difficult to find amongst the busy streets of downtown. Honestly, Feyre sort of wondered how on earth Rhys had managed to get lost when all he’d really done was walk in a straight line away from his hotel for about a mile. It almost felt a little unfair to be taking so much money from him over something he could’ve easily figured out himself but, then again, any man willing to throw three-thousand dollars away over something so minor probably deserved to get scammed.

The man in question stared up at the entrance and then back at her curiously, as if surprised she had actually kept her word and done what he had asked. Then, without a word, he opened the door and waltzed inside.

She stood there for a moment, not sure what she was supposed to do now. Did he expect her to follow him up to his room? Or did she wait outside and hope he returned with the money? Thankfully, he saved her from fretting for too long because she saw him reappear, holding the door open for her.

“Aren’t you coming?” He arched an eyebrow at her as if to say ‘well?’.

She supposed that was as good an invitation as any and followed him inside.

The lobby was enormous. That was her first thought. Her second thought was that she absolutely did not belong here. Everything looked so…expensive. And white. Spotlessly white. White walls. White marble floors. White furniture and decor. White, white, white. Rhys, however, seemed completely unfazed by all the luxury around him and headed straight for the gold elevator, Feyre scrambled after him and desperately hoping her grubby shoes weren’t leaving dirty shoe prints on the pristine floor (they were).

They were quiet on the ride up and she watched the number slowly rise and rise and rise the higher they went. Just how far up was his room? When she saw the number go past forty her mind really started to boggle. What on earth was past the fortieth floor?

The fucking Presidential Suite, it turned out.

No wonder he was willing to throw thousands of dollars around for some directions. This place had to cost at least three times that just for a single night!

Rhys, oblivious to her inner turmoil over his clearly considerable wealth, wandered in almost aimlessly, dropping his coat on the back of a chair and loosening his tie as if returning home after a long day at work.

“Make yourself comfortable. Give me a moment and I’ll grab the rest of your money.”

Your money. As if it were already hers and he was just returning it to her.

She just nodded dumbly, but he was already disappearing around the corner into what she assumed was the bedroom. She tried to do as he said and briefly sat down on the couch…only to shoot back up moments later, afraid to sully the spotless brocade with her…with her what? The miasma of poverty she carried with her?

“Here,” Rhys reappeared carrying a large stack of crisp hundred dollar bills and handed them to her without fanfare. “That should be twenty-five hundred but feel free to double check. I wouldn’t want to cheat you out of what you’re owed.”

He was right. She should count the money just to be safe. She needed it to keep the roof over her head after all.

She didn’t.

Because it suddenly occurred to her…she had the money now to pay this and last month’s rent…but what about next month’s rent? And the one after that? She still had to cover Elain’s portion of the rent now that she had moved out. And Nesta was still M.I.A. and thus unavailable to pay her half. So where did that leave Feyre? Stuck covering the entirety of their fifteen-hundred dollar rent bill all by herself for the foreseeable future, that’s what. She needed some sort of buffer to fall back on while she waited out the last few months on her rental agreement and Nesta figured her shit out.

She needed more money.

And, she thought as she looked up at the handsome man before her, it looked like she might just have someone willing to give it to her.

“Is that all you want?” She tried to sound sultry but Feyre had a feeling she sounded less like Jessica Rabbit and more like Velma from Scooby Doo. Awkward. And incredibly young.

Rhys gave her a strange look. It wasn’t turned off exactly, but it also wasn’t exactly turned on. He seemed…searching. Like he was trying to figure her out.

“Isn’t that all you want?” He asked, turning the question around on her.

“I could…do more,” she said clumsily. “For a price of course…”

He didn’t answer her, just hummed thoughtfully. She pressed forward, hoping he just needed more convincing.

“You could have me for the whole night this time. I can do whatever you like…”

“How old are you?”

The question caught her completely off guard. He had already asked this on their walk and she had already given him an answer. She’d told him that she was twenty-four but it was clear now that he hadn’t believed a word she’d said. And, looking up at his inflexible features, it was even more clear that this time he wanted a real answer. A truthful one.

Feyre glanced down nervously. Would he continue if he knew her real age? Her real name? Her real reason for being here? Or would he kick her to the curb?

She really, really needed the money.

“Nineteen.”

He nodded, as if this were what he’d been expecting.

“And is your real name Vivian?”

“…No.”

“And would you rather I called you Vivian?”

“Yes, please,” she whispered meekly.

“Why were you on that street corner Vivian?”

She hesitated. Did she tell him the truth? She’d already divulged more than she likely should have…but he was being strangely sweet to a random stray he’d found on the side of the road. So what was the harm in giving him at least a little more? Not all of it though. She wasn’t that stupid.

“I was going to be evicted and needed the money. I still need the money.”

“I see,” and just like before, he did. He wasn’t pitying exactly, but he had a look of understanding. “And do you want to have sex Vivian?”

The answer to that question should’ve been ‘no’. She absolutely should not have wanted to have sex with a much older man just so she could pay her rent. It was wrong. It was illegal.

And he was really hot.

And nice to her.

“Yes.”

Shockingly, he didn’t immediately turn her down. He just said, “Are you sure?”

“Will you be paying me?” This was, after all, why she was here. Even if she also selfishly wanted to know what he looked like without his clothes on. If she had to earn her paycheck on her back, at least it was underneath somebody who wasn’t a completele asshole and looked like he stepped out of a perfume commercial.

“If that’s what you want.”

“Then I’d rather earn my money, if you don’t mind.”

He just nodded.

And that was that.

• $ • $ • $ • $ • $ • $ • $ • $ • $ • $ • $ • $ •

They didn’t immediately jump into bed, as it turned out.

As she soon discovered, there were negotiations to be made. Prices to agree upon. And limits to discuss. Honestly it felt a lot like that Fifty Shades movie she had guiltily watched on her laptop and then told everyone she hadn’t seen.

“Is there anything you don’t want me to do?”

Truthfully, her sexual experience was rather limited so it was hard for her to answer that question. She’d only ever had sex with two people a handful of times before deciding that maybe she just wasn’t that into it. But he was also paying to use her body so it really didn’t matter what she was into. Just what she absolutely wouldn’t be able to stomach.

“Just…no kissing.”

In hindsight, it seemed like a stupid rule but it felt right to her. Sex was sex. But kissing made it…real. Like feelings were involved.

He didn’t argue. Only gave her a curious look before moving on.

Finally, he handed her an even larger stack of bills than before.

Five-thousand dollars.

Between that and the money he had given her previously, she was officially eight-thousand dollars richer. It was enough to make anyone feel a little faint.

“So you just…have this kind of cash on hand?” Feyre blurted out, a little breathless.

It was still mind boggling to her that anyone would throw this sort of money around willy nilly, as if it weren’t life-changing. Because that’s what this was for her. It was a life preserver. He was saving her and he didn’t even seem to know it.

Rhys raised his eyebrows.

“Not always. Usually I just use credit cards.” She noticed he hadn’t actually answered her question but knew better than to push. He probably thought she was planning to rob him or something.

As if you aren’t already? Her brain screeched, still unable to process that anyone was willing to spend this kind of money just to get inside of her. If you asked her, she was worth like…a hundred bucks and maybe a pizza. Maybe. Not…eight-thousand fucking dollars. And for only the one night!

Feyre took the money and held it in her hands like a live grenade. It felt wrong to just stash this in her purse instead of immediately dashing to a bank or ATM to deposit it but she’d made an agreement and, damn it, she was going to stick to it.

“So…how do you wanna do this?”

By now, Rhys was lounging on the couch in the living area, watching her intently as if she were a fascinating creature and not a very broke and awkward teenager.

He patted his lap. “Come here.”

Whelp. In for a penny, in for a pound.

She sat on his knee and shifted clumsily, trying to find a more comfortable position, but Rhys fixed that quickly by pulling her against his chest so she could hear his heart beating against her ear.

“Can I touch you?” He asked, as if they hadn’t just spent the last forty-five minutes discussing exactly that.

“Of course.”

He could’ve touched her anywhere. Her breasts. Her ass. Between her legs. And yet it caught her completely off guard when he went for, not any of those, but for her hair.

He was…stroking her hair.

She went still.

Bit by bit she felt her muscles go lax and limp. She felt a bit like a cat being stroked into a nice, long nap. It was…nice. Soothing.

“Good girl.”

They were such simple words. So normal. A little condescending even. But god, they lit up her brain like a fucking Christmas tree.

Oh, she thought as gooseflesh broke out along her arms. So it’s like that then?

Feyre pressed her nose to his throat and filled her lungs with the scent of salt and citrus and expensive cologne as she tried to suppress the shiver that suddenly took hold of her.

She felt…restless.

Squirmy.

That hand kept stroking her hair, unconcerned with the bomb he had set off in her brain.

“Look at you,” Rhys murmured into her ear. “I knew there was a sweet girl under all that bravado.”

She felt his other hand skim down the length of her, the slope of her shoulders and the curve of her waist, before coming to rub innocent circles into her thigh.

“Are you going to be my good girl?” He whispered, petting her hair with one hand while his other finally began to sneak under the hem of her skirt. “Are you soft and wet for me?”

Her heart thumped against her ribcage like a hummingbird trying to fly free.

Oh she was certainly wet alright, a fact he soon discovered when she heard his pleased groan as his fingers made contact with the gusset of her panties.

“My good sweet girl. You need this don’t you?”

Feyre shivered as lust crawled through her veins like fire. He hadn’t even really touched her yet and she could already feel her heartbeat throbbing away in her cunt.

“Please,” she begged against his neck.

Those fingers petted her over her panties. Softly. Gently. Like she were a wild animal that needed taming. Her clitoris felt flush with blood and heat. Jesus, this was already hotter than anything she’d ever done and he’d barely even touched her. 

“That’s it…”

She just sighed.

Between one moment and the next she felt his fingers slip under her panties and brush against the curls there. Self consciousness suddenly gripped her. Should she have shaved?Didn’t men hate pubic hair? Her last two partners had. Perhaps there was still time to make an excuse and then go find a razor in the bathroom and-

“So soft for me here.”

Okay. So maybe he didn’t mind it so much.

His fingers sifted through her pubic hair until they found the burning seam of her. They dipped inside and she tried hard not to gasp when they brushed over the pulsing little bead of her clitoris.

“And so soft for me here too…” She felt ready to combust when two of his fingers burrowed their way inside of her.

His erection pulsed underneath her, hot and hard, but shockingly Rhys, unlike every man she’d ever met, seemed in no hurry to attend to it. Perfectly content to whisper in her ear and plunder her insides while he ground his palm against her clit.

“Don’t…don’t you want to have sex?” Feyre gasped against his throat.

She felt a gust of laughter against her skin. “My sweet girl, what do you think we’re doing?”

And then, just as if to prove his point, he curled his fingers inside of her.

In theory, Feyre knew what the g-spot was. She’d heard it spoken about in whispers in the girl’s locker room, as if it were a myth. She’d read about it in the romance novels she told Nesta she totally didn’t steal from her. And yet, none of that could’ve prepared her for what it felt like to actually find out that it was very real and ohJesusohGodohfuck-

Her body seized. Her legs kicked out. Her toes curled.

“There you go,” Rhys crooned sweetly, petting her through her orgasm. “Such a good girl. You’re so pretty when you come.”

She was shivering.

Why couldn’t she stop shivering?

Rhys lifted her as if she weighed no more than a kitten. Only moments later she found herself laid down upon a plush white bedspread. His room. He had taken her to his room.

“Are you going to fuck me now?” She whispered, suddenly sleepy.

“Is my sweet girl so desperate for my cock already?” He asked, amused. He pulled the covers out from under her and then laid them over her, cocooning her in a cloud of warmth.

“Why don’t you come over here and…uh…find out,” Feyre replied with a yawn.

“We have all night for that,” he pointed out as her eyes began to droop.

“Yeah…that’s true…”

Maybe he was going to let her nap and then wake her up later? It was getting late after all. And his bed was so very comfortable…maybe just a quick power nap first…

She was asleep long before he kissed her on the forehead goodnight.

[tsbs-shipfessions]

As a member of the DCA Fandom and TSAMS fan I NEED more people to make Canon (from the games) Sun and TSAMS Sun interact. Be it platonically or in this case, romantically. They could be enemies to lovers who make each other better in the end. Note, this rant is mainly about Canon Sun’s thoughts on TSAMS Sun, if anyone wants to add the inverse they are more then welcome.

Canon Sun (at least in the books) started out as an act for the theater before getting thrown into the daycare. He’s never been outside the Pizzaplex, and possibly hasn’t left the daycare. He can’t go on the internet, watch TV, or buy things. He seemingly doesn’t know the Glamrocks personality and only has the kids in the daycare for company. He’s fighting Moon for control over his own body. And then there’s TSAMS Sun who leaves the daycare every day to go to his house filled with the groceries he bought where he can relax and watch TV with his three other siblings, his nephew, his daughter, and his Moon, who’s in a his own body. And I think the biggest kicker for Canon Sun would be that TSAMS Sun was made to a daycare attendant. He didn’t have to learn the ropes by himself under the threat of getting decommissioning if he fucked up the job Fazbear didn’t prepare him for. He’s so good with the kids and almost always knows exactly what to do. He can control his temper around them and knows what punishments are needed if any are needed at all. I think Canon Sun would so incredibly jealous of TSAMS Sun’s life at first. I don’t know if there’s anything TSAMS Sun would be jealous about, on account of Canon Sun being perpetually stuck in a mashup of two of TSAMS Sun’s biggest traumas (sharing a body with Moon and fighting Eclipse for control), but Canon would probably be rude and/or passive aggressive as hell to him and he’d probably return that, or maybe he’d have some sympathy for him because of the whole “being stuck in my hell” thing.

But eventually, Canon sees that Tsams has his own shit going on. For one, when TSAMS Sun and Moon shared a body it was a nonstop war. I’m pretty sure they’ve confirmed in TSAMS that switching out with the lights was a compromise they made. While yes, Sun was naturally dominant and Moon had to fight to front, every time Moon as much as blinked, it would put Sun in agony. It was literally designed by that roach to be painful, and probably there so they would fight each other instead of him. Another thing, TSAMS Sun also had to fight for control. And yes he did have his Moon to help him, but not only his Moon was also the one to put him in that situation in the first place, he also threatened to kill him if he didn’t control it. And that’s not even counting the fact that TSAMS Moon was actually abuse towards his Sun for the longest time. Canon would absolutely fucking despite TSAMS Moon btw. And TSAMS’s daughter? A ghost child, who was killed by someone in Sun’s body, when Sun didn’t even know someone else was there. (And if Canon Moon has anything to do with those missing kids, Canon Sun might have empathy instead of sympathy.) And that’s not even touching the multiple people who’ve tried to kill Sun for whatever reason or family drama. Basically Canon Sun would be jealous of TSAMS until he realized he has his own shit going on.

Ok onto the romance part. Starting with the jealousy phase. “I want to be you but I also want to kiss you” is a fun and messy trope. He slowly begins to idolize TSAMS because he began to mistake a better life for being a better person. And during this whole thing TSAMS Sun is either thinking, “what’s his problem?” but still finds himself drawn to Canon or “I guess I’d be like that if I was stuck with an Eclipse-Moon” and wants to help. But as Canon Sun starts to cool down and lose his jealousy he starts idolizing TSAMS even more. Meanwhile TSAMS starts to idolize Canon, wishing he could be more assertive and that he could stand up for himself. That he could be that goofy in the face of torment, even if it was a mask. As Canon tries to make up TSAMS, they start getting closer. At some point during that they start to acknowledge their feelings. I’d imagine in some dramatic moment where one of them realizes the other idolizes them and they share what they wish they had that they see in each other, a confession accidentally slips through. When they’re together, Canon tries to help TSAMS be more assertive and TSAMS helps Canon calm down.

Also any DCA Fandom members I need you to release that TSAMS Sun is just a DCA Y/N with a fuckton of lore. If that word vomit didn’t get you that might.

ok bye

[azrielslightintheshadows]

Hello! I'm back!

Could I request a cassian one this time? :0

The reader is his pregnant mate when Nesta comes along and starts taking up most of Cassian's time for training. When reader tries to talk to him about it he doesn't get it and it's only thinking of the orders rhysand gave him. Reader cries and yells at him before storming off. Maybe she goes to amren's and refuses to talk to him for a week? You can decide how it ends!

I've been living for your angst so much! Your writing is amazing so thank you for sharing with the fandom it means a lot! I hope your computer troubles get sorted soon, but thank you for continuing dispite it! (You're doing amazing sweetie :-D)

-🌿

My girls.

Cassian x f!Reader

Masterlist.

Warnings; angst, swearing.

Hello leaf annon!!! I missed you! Hope you enjoy this too! I wasn't sure if you wanted Cassian to know about the pregnancy so I'm so sorry if this isn't what you wanted, feel free to request a new one where he doesn't know!

Cassian always wanted to become a father, he had discussed about it with you multiple times since the first month you two met, so after 15 years of trying it finally happened and you couldn’t be more ecstatic. Cassian almost fainted when you told him, he yearned for it so much that he actually couldn’t believe it, then fear took over and he became so overprotective and unbearable that you sometimes wanted to move out of the house of wind. But you quickly realized that you actually loved this side of him, and unfortunately you only came to that conclusion when he stopped showing any interest. When the two Archeron sisters were thrown into the Cauldron everything changed, at first everyone was trying to find a way to get Feyre back from the spring court, then they had to find a way to help the other two sisters adjust to the new world they were forcibly made part of and lastly, they had to stop Nesta from doing stupid shit that compromised everyone’s lives and money.

You didn’t mind it at first and you even tried to help the young females as much as you could but when Rhysand ordered Cassian to keep an eye on Nesta your heart broke. You didn’t know if it was the hormones of the pregnancy or the primal instincts of the mating bond that made you want to chew her head off. You were able to control yourself until now. Cassian kept spending most of his time with her, he would leave your bed before you woke up to train her, he would take her out for lunch after their training and then he would take her to Rhysand to find a way to control her powers. You would wait for him to have dinner together but most of the days he would follow Nesta around town making sure she didn't visit the taverns and fall back to her old habits. You had enough, your baby bump was getting bigger and bigger every day, you couldn’t do half of the things you used to, your clothes didn’t fit you and no one was there to help you. So, you decided to confront Cassian about everything.

You sat on your shared bed wearing one oversized shirt that belonged to Cassian and one pair of his grey sweatpants -the only clothes that fit- and pulled the bond harshly wanting to make a statement about how urgent it was. After a few minutes you heard the familiar beating sound of wings and your mate’s hurried footsteps, he burst into the room panting and with a worried expression.

“What happened? Are you okay? Is it the baby? Oh Cauldron… is there something wrong with the baby?” he was frantically scanning your body and then his wide eyes stayed on your round belly.

“The baby is fine…” you sighed feeling guilty for worrying him.

Cassian’s face became hard as stone as he stared at you.

“I’m not okay Cass” you confessed and lowered your gaze to the floor.

“Why?” “Because I feel neglected, you spend most of your time with Nesta you are never here…and I need you now more than ever.” You replied and pointed to your belly.

“Are you serious right now? You pulled me out of an important meeting just to tell me you’re feeling lonely?” He yelled.

Your bottom lip trembled, and you felt tears streaming down your face. Cassian saw your expression and for a split second his features softened but then the cold mask was back.

“I’ve been working my ass off to keep you and everyone safe for the past few months and this is the thanks I get. I’m drowning every day trying to handle all the duties Rhysand gave me and my own mate only cares about herself” His voice was getting louder with each word.

You couldn’t take it anymore, so you got up and with one swift move you hit your vanity, all your stuff scattering around.

“Fuck off, this is your baby too, if you can’t be a general and a father too then stay alone, I don’t want you near my child if you’re going to neglect it too.” You screamed and stormed off. Cassian froze, he had never seen you this angry, he stared at your broken things on the ground and replayed the things you said in his mind. You always wanted to talk things through and now that you yelled and stormed off, he didn’t know what to do. He thought about the past few months and his heart ached as he realized that he was never there for you, he missed most of your pregnancy because of some orders that Azriel could handle just fine if he asked him to. Guilt consumed him burning his whole body, his throat was closing, and he felt the panic... it came so strong that he almost dropped on his knees. His wings slumped and sobs started shaking his body.

“What did I do?” he whispered.

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

After you stormed off, you found Rhysand in the dinning room and begged him to take you somewhere else, you didn’t want to face Cassian again, your pregnancy made you feel everything ten times stronger, and you were certain that if you saw his face, you would actually try to behead him. Rhysand could see how broken you were so without a word he winnowed you to your best friend’s – Amren’s apartment. You met Amren a few months after Cassian, the tiny ancient one as your mate called her, loved to terrorize him so you instantly clicked to Cassian’s horror and you both made his life more difficult than it should have been. He didn’t mind it though, he loved the sound of your laughter every time he fell for one of your pranks.

When you and Rhysand appeared in the middle of her apartment, and she saw your face she instantly jumped off her bed and engulfed you in a warm hug.

“What happened girl?” she asked and waved to Rhysand. She knew that you wouldn’t talk in front of the high lord. He nodded and disappeared.

You were sitting on her bed, explaining what happened and crying your heart out.

Amren listened carefully, a pissed look appearing on her face and low growls leaving her throat.

“Fucking idiot, I will strangle him with my bare hands.”

“No… please don’t say anything, I need some time to heal and then I will strangle him myself.” You smiled and amusement flashed in her eyes.

“What are you going to do?” she asked. “I would like to stay here if you don’t mind, at least until the baby is born.” You caressed your belly.

“Are you sure? I don’t mind having you here but wouldn’t you like Cassian to be there when you give birth?” she asked.

“No… at least for now.”

“Okay.” She said and shrugged.

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

Cassian was losing his mind, he kept begging Rhysand to let him come get you, the high lord though wouldn’t budge, he went through the warlord’s mind and when he found out what had happened rage filled his body and mind. He couldn’t believe how stupid his brother is. His heart ached for you, and he was internally accusing himself for everything, he regretted giving all these duties to Cassian, he couldn’t understand how he didn’t stop to consider how the pregnant female -full of hormones- would feel if her mate spent most of his time with another female. So, he decided to at least respect your wish to stay away and not let Cassian come get you, he felt bad for using his high lord’s voice on his brother, but he had to.

“Rhys, please.” Cassian pleaded for the hundredth time.

“No. You messed up and she needs time, we have to respect that” Rhysand scowled.

“She’s coming back though… right?” the warlord’s voice was barely above a whisper, he looked like a small child needing its parent’s reassurance.

Rhysand thought about that, he didn’t know for sure and for the first time since you left, he felt fear. His furrowed eyebrows and his silence didn’t go unnoticed by the general who let out a cry. Azriel’s eyes watered at the sight, and he stepped out of the shadows, placing his hand on his brother’s shoulder to console him. The shadowsinger glanced at Rhys who shook his head and flicked his fingers, a bottle of whiskey appearing on the table.

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

It had been one week since you left, Amren had been so supportive, and you even found her reading a book about birth in case you needed help. You knew that Rhysand was frequently checking in by her unfocussed eyes. You were glad that Cassian didn’t come to get you and you made a mental note to thank Rhys for that. The baby had stopped kicking ever since the fight and it broke your heart, you realized that it used to kick only when it heard Cassian’s voice, and now… nothing.

You were on the verge of crying again when Rhys appeared in the middle of the room.

“Next time you appear here without informing me first you are done.” Amren growled. “Sorry…” Rhysand gave her his signature feline smile and turned to you. “Y/n… he is a mess, I have never seen him like that. You must come back”.

“When I was a mess he didn’t even notice, so believe me when I say that I don’t care, he deserves it.” You crossed your hands, resting them on your swollen belly.

Rhysand opened his mouth to speak but you cut him off with a gasp.

“Oh no” you said and crouched. “What’s wrong?” Rhys and Amren said at the same time and rushed to you.

“The baby is coming” you shouted, and they helped you to the bed. “I’m going to get Madja” Rhysand said and took a few steps back. “Cassian… I want Cassian” you cried out and he nodded.

Amren removed your pants and helped you get in a comfortable position, she brought pillows and warm towels. “Cassian” you screamed and grabbed her hand.

“I know… he is coming” she whispered and squeezed your hand. “Please I need him please” you cried and screamed his name again.

Strong arms engulfed you and your mate’s familiar scent filled your nostrils.

“I’m here doll…” he whispered and pressed a kiss on your temple.

“Don’t leave” you cried.

“Never” he replied and hugged you harder.

Madja was between your legs and after a few pushes your baby girl made her way to this world crying and kicking.

“She’s beautiful” Cassian whispered as he stared down to the little bundle of blankets in his arms. She looked so tiny when he held her, and the sight warmed your heart. The moment Madja placed her in her daddy’s arms she stared at him and slowly closed her eyes feeling warm and safe.

“I love you” he said and looked at you “I love you both, I will never let you down again”.

“I know… we love you too” you replied, and he laid next to you putting your baby girl between the two of you.

He draped a protective wing above you, creating a cocoon and whispered.

“My girls”

Requests are open but delayed!

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍🌈

(This is a resubmission. I sent my original ask I think back in November and I haven’t been able to find it so I reread your FAQ real quick and deduced Tumblr must have eaten it or I won’t find it)(sorry if it has been posted and I missed it)

AITA for kind of leading on my friend who is now my boyfriend back when he thought he was my girlfriend?

(also this isn’t a fandom at all if it got mistaken for that, this is my life somehow)

I dont remember the fake names I used so let’s go with TJ for technically partner, and El and Leo for my sister and her boyfriend.

The long and short of it is, I’m a gay man. Always have been and probably always will be. TJ, Leo and El and I are all pretty good friends even before this.

What basically happened was I had bought tickets to see a movie with a guy I liked, who cancelled on me last minute. It was a movie TJ (at the time identifying as female and had not realized he was a trans man) really wanted to see, so I brought TJ. On what I assumed was a friendship thing.

That’s kind of where it started. From there, there were several events that this guy I liked kept cancelling on me, and as total coincidence I swear, were things TJ liked doing. Movie, zoo, Italian restaurant one time, etc.

(Honestly it got to a point that it was obvious the other guy and I weren’t going to work, so there weren’t any hard feelings there)

This went on for a few months before Leo mentioned how cute we were together. I wasn’t sure what he meant and he and El admitted that they thought that TJ and I were dating, that I was actually bi and had decided to go out with TJ. (Who just for the record is Leo’s brother so he saw how happy TJ apparently was lately)

Anyway all that freaked me out and I didn’t realize that TJ and the others thought I liked TJ like that. I mean at the time I thought we were just really good friends, and it’s not like there’s anything about TJ at the time that would have made him a bad girlfriend, just that I wasn’t interested in girls.

Until TJ came out to me as trans. I hadn’t known whether to tell TJ the truth or not, and then when he came out to me I realized how much he trusted me and I couldn’t. Hurt him like that.

But now he’s like, literally the hottest guy ever and I’m honestly really glad I stuck it out because now we’re definitely dating and I’m the luckiest guy ever.

But I still wonder if I was the asshole for never being honest, and if I still am for still not telling him the truth. Like, if I WAS honest, maybe I wouldn’t be dating him now. Idk.

Am I an asshole?

(ps: @throw-it-out-boys is my throwaway sideblog for this, so I’m tagging it so I’ll get a ping if this one is posted. In theory)

What are these acronyms?

[oopsiedaisiesbaby]

I know you usually write quite grounded stuff but what about a world where everyone has a little innate magic, even if most can't use it. And if someone wished hard enough, or was stressed enough, or did the wrong combinations of things and words, little changes could happen. Maybe you have blue hair for a while until a magical illness passes. Maybe you can only tell the truth until you say the right counter spell, or someone de-ages for a bit when they're feeling too stressed to think.

There are two scenarios that I think would work really, really well for this world:

1. One of the boys wakes up with a pussy

2. One of the boys wakes up with the urge to obey every command, even sarcastic ones. ( "Go fuck yourself" and "blow me" are quickly discovered)

Oooh I have never written anything with even a hint of fantasticalness to it… let’s do this 😍 Full disclosure… it’s the middle of the night and I’ve just finished a 6 hour drive, you’ve been warned 😘

1. Sorry not sorry, but Gale is waking up with a magical vagina and the only thing to cure it is getting dicked down. I know I’ve seen a fic like this in Hangster fandom, so apologies if there’s similarities, it’s wholly unintentional. Unedited rough draft beginning of a fic below… second half coming soon… just like Gale 😉

2. Notoriously allergic to authority John is definitely getting this curse because this would be such a comical way for him to find out how much he likes being bossed around by Gale. I really wanna write this too, fingers crossed my brain eventually cooperates!

To say that the war was stressful would be the grossest understatement of the century.

Even Gale, ice cold and forever calmer than the evening air before a storm, had been shaken by that first mission. However, he quickly learned how to lock it down and move forward like he did with everything else.

Stress was inconsequential and unnecessary to his existence. He wasn’t going to let it get in his way and end up with a spontaneous stress affect like Hambone who woke up with blue hair, or Crank who spent a whole day ribbiting like a frog every time he tried to talk.

Gale was above that kind of stress, knew how to get ahead of it or handle it when he couldn’t prevent it. Until he didn’t.

It took him an embarrassingly long time to realize something was off. He was always hyper aware of his body, it came with being a great pilot.

Gale was tired that morning though. Had flown back to back missions that had both gone horribly awry.

Made it all the way to the bathroom to pee before he realized something pretty integral to his person was missing as he went to grab his dick and wrapped his fist around air. He frowned, blinking down at his cock before realizing it wasn’t even there.

Panic seized him as he pressed his hand where his dick should have been and felt nothing but pubes and a flat surface. He let his fingers drift between his legs where his balls should have been and jolted as his rough fingertips parted soft skin and nudged up against something unbearably sensitive. He gasped, yanking his hand away from his apparent vagina and accidentally hit John’s arm where he was pissing in the urinal next to Gale.

“What the hell are you br-” John cut off suddenly, eyes going wide and lips parting in surprise as he noticed Gale’s lack of a penis almost immediately. “Gale, that’s - are you - wh- fuuuck.”

Gale shrugged helplessly, unable to answer any of John’s unasked questions. Nobody knew how or why spontaneous stress affects happened, they just did. The only cure was to lessen stress. Gale was a goddamned bomber pilot in the Second World War though.

He still needed to pee.

He shouldered into a stall, John following close behind him and standing in the way of Gale shutting the door behind him. Gale didn’t care, he sat on the toilet and started peeing, slumping in relief at the sudden release. He glanced up at John, unsurprised to see that his dick was still out.

“Can you put that away?” Gale asked, raising an eyebrow when John’s brow furrowed in confusion.

That’s all it seemed to take before John’s mouth dropped into an understanding “o” and he tucked himself back into his pants.

“We gotta get you to medical,” John insisted as he watched Gale figure out wiping after peeing.

“Absolutely not,” Gale bristled. No fucking way was he letting this particular spontaneous stresss affect get around base. His squadron would never follow an order again.

“Buck,” John started, like he had any room to be telling Gale how to handle his business after he goaded some RAF pilots into a fight just the night before. “I really -”

“No,” Gale snapped, his tone final. They were not going to tell a soul about this. “I just need to lower my stress and I’ll be fine.”

Except Gale woke up the next day with his magical vagina still very firmly in place. He shook his head at John’s raised eyebrow, ignoring his pointed look and went about his business.

As the days wore on, Gale’s irritation grew at every knowing, disappointed look John gave him. His frustration mounted each time he had to sit down to pee. He felt wretched every time his pants rode up and the seam of his pants pressed against him just right.

He was so sensitive physically as well as emotionally as the stress didn’t lessen, it just built and built into an itching, burning crescendo until he was snapping at Ken forcing everyone around them to freeze at just how out of character it was. John whistled before grabbing him by the shoulders, apologizing on his behalf and guiding him away from the scene he had just created.

“We have got to get a handle on this, Buck,” John insisted, rubbing his hands up and down Gale’s arms, over his jacket. “This has gone on long enough, don’t you think?”

Gale simply shrugged, determined to avoid ever having to actually talk about it.

“C’mon, Buck,” John urged. “We gotta get your stress down, and I know the most sure fire way to do it.”

Gale stopped in his tracks, whirling around on John, furious to find out he’d been withholding information from him. That’s when he noticed the filthy smirk on John’s lips.

Shoving him away, Gale stormed off tossing an, “Absolutely not,” over his shoulder only to receive a delighted cackle.

The dirty bastard.

Gale thought his rejection would be enough. He should’ve known John would test his limits like he was getting paid to do so though.

At the pub he leaned into Gale’s space and asked what it was like to get wet. In the officer’s mess, he leaned back in his chair and asked if Gale had tried fingering himself much to Gale and Jack’s chagrin.

It was when he asked what Gale thought about eating pussy one evening during a movie, his obscenely large tongue sliding out to sweep across his top lip suggestively, disturbing his mustache that had Gale squirming. Something between his legs tingled pleasantly and Gale could feel himself flushing. John’s teasing grin slipping into smirking awareness did nothing to quell the staticky interest buzzing through Gale’s belly and centralizing between his clenching thighs with slick interest.

“That’s it, baby?” John teased, tossing an arm behind Gale and leaning in real close. “You want someone to bury their face between those incredible thighs and eat you out until your legs are shaking, huh?”

It shouldn’t have been so hot. John was his best friend, John was just teasing him for getting himself such a ridiculous spontaneous stress affect. He was just so wound up though.

Gale cleared his throat, directing his attention back to the screen as he shifted in his seat, his underwear already sticking to him uncomfortably.

“Shit,” John cursed like he too was surprised by how affected Gale was. He pressed his forehead against Gale’s temple making Gale feel grateful they were in the back row. “Know you’d taste so sweet too, all hot and wet and needy.”

John groaned quietly and Gale felt the hot gust of his breath before John was pressing his mouth against the hinge of his jaw. This had already gone too far, he crossed his legs.

“No,” John pleaded, his hand shooting out to cup between Gale’s legs and press.

Gale gasped at the overwhelming pleasure as it pressed the seam of his pants, right up against where he needed it most. He tossed his head back against John’s arm that was still behind him, gasping up at the ceiling quietly.

“I would make it so good for you, baby,” John promised, rubbing his fingers against Gale through his pants and Gale fought back a moan at how sensitive he felt between his legs. “Make you come with my mouth first before slipping you a couple of fingers.”

The whispers were filthy and hot in Gale’s ear as he started to rock his hips against John’s hand. Electric shocks, jolting through him with each press. He nearly groaned with relief when John moved his hand to start unbuckling Gale’s belt and undoing his fly before slipping his hand inside of Gale’s skivvies. They both whimpered as John’s rough fingers slipped between his wet lips and started rubbing at his painfully swollen clit.

“God,” John moaned quietly against the skin of his jaw, mustache scraping Gale’s sensitive skin.

Gale let his eyes flutter closed, panting up at the ceiling as electricity built dangerously between his legs, ready to burst and strike out as John continued to move his fingers in tight, quick circles over his clit.

“Just know your pussy’s so fucking tight,” John told him, licking at the taught skin of his jaw. “Would probably hurt but I’d love it. Christ, wanna feel just how wet you are around my cock.”

Gale was embarrassingly soaked, the slick sound of John’s fingers rubbing at his clit was deafeningly loud in the limited space between them. Apparently it was loud enough to be heard outside of the space between them too.

“What the hell is wrong with you two?” Jack snapped, a look of horror pinching his face as he turned around in his seat to glare at them pointedly.

John unashamedly took his hand out of Gale’s pants and it nearly had Gale sobbing at the lack of release of the pressure built between his legs. Jack turned back around in his seat as Gale buttoned his pants back up and fixed his belt.

His pussy throbbed as he watched John slip his wet fingers into his mouth and suck lewdly. Gale was going to get them a weekend pass come he’ll or high water.

Part 2 coming to your screens soon 😘

[companionjones]

Your Thoughts

Pairing: Edward Cullen x Reader

Fandom: Twilight

Warnings: Anxiety, self-hatred, one curse word

*******

    He first heard them off in the distance. Then, they got louder, and louder, and louder. He finally realized who all the thoughts were coming from as you entered the room.

    Sadly, you immediately walked right in front of a fan. Edward had to physically hold himself back from attacking you as soon as he could smell you. Your blood was like his own personal brand of heroine.

    Aaannd Edward had to spend an entire class with you sitting next to him. He thought that after hundreds of years he was finally going to snap and lose everything.

    What made things worse, was that he could read your mind. All you could think was that you badly reeked and everyone could smell you. Your thoughts only got worse from there.

    By the end of the class, Edward needed to get out of there, but he couldn’t without telling you, “It’s not your fault,” before leaving.

    Edward tried to get out of Biology. When he couldn’t, he was gone for about a week, trying to get his shit together.

    Although you were no longer around him, Edward couldn’t get your thoughts out of his head. He felt horrible that he made you feel like that. Changing your thoughts was the only reason he went back to school.

    When Biology rolled around, Edward headed for the seats in which you and he had been sitting, only to find that you could not have been sitting farther from them.

    Along with your overwhelming scent, Edward heard all of your thoughts again, and they were just as dark and lonely as before. Edward fought past his vampire instincts and sat next you you again. He offered a light smile in your direction.

    Your thoughts responded accordingly. If Edward had to put one word to them, it would’ve been confusion.

    He tried to levee your thoughts with conversation. “Hello.” He cursed himself for sounding so rehearsed. “I’m sorry for not introducing myself last week...I’m Edward Cullen.”

    “I’m Y/n L/n,” you introduced.

    You were scared of him, that much was obvious from your thoughts. But you weren’t scared of Edward in the way he expected. You were scared of him like you were scared of everyone, and you wondered why he, why anyone, would talk to you.

    Edward hoped those thoughts would leave you as he talked to you longer.

    “Do you like the weather here?” He decided that was a normal enough question to ask.

    Perhaps it was too normal of a question, because you thought it a bit odd that he had asked. You replied anyway, “Yeah, I do. It has been raining a lot, though. I miss the sun.” You hoped you hadn’t talked for too long.

    Edward wished you hadn’t thought that. He couldn’t remember ever reading a mind that had as much anxiety as yours did. He wanted so badly to lighten up your mind that he found himself agreeing with you about the sun. It wasn’t untrue. Edward did miss the sun, just maybe a little less now because seeing it would mean he wouldn’t be able to see inside your mind for the day.

    You and Edward talked for the rest of the class. He asked you many questions: How long you had been in town, what was the farthest you’d been from home, etc. He just couldn’t get enough of you or your mind. He had also succeeded in getting your mind to stop thinking such terrible things about yourself. Well, he did, at least until the bell rung.

    Thoughts started flooding your head about how you didn’t want him to go because this was the best interaction you could remember having.

    Who was Edward to deprive you of that?

    He knew he shouldn’t have, but he kept talking to you. When the bell rang and you both had to go to your next class, Edward exchanged phone numbers with you so you could text during class. The two of you did so for the rest of the day.

    “You should really let me drive you home today. It’s still raining.” Edward texted after the final bell.

    You texted back, “I couldn’t ask you to do that.”

    “You’re not asking, I’m offering. Let me drive you home,” he said as he approached you from behind.

    Edward had just made you smile for the first time. He felt his long-dead heart flutter. Edward also felt the eyes of his siblings on him. He knew they had heard what he had just said because everyone’s thoughts were heavily cautioning him to just leave you.

    Everyone’s thoughts except Alice’s. “Just go. It’ll be fun.”

    Maybe it was because she was thinking very clearly, or maybe it was because Edward wanted to hear that the most, but either way, Alice’s thoughts came through louder than the rest of his siblings. It was what convinced him to get into his car with you.

    And so, Edward drove you home that day. He also drove you to and from school the next day, and the next day, and every day for the rest of that week.

    When Friday rolled around, you got into Edward’s car with questions rolling around inside your head.

    “Why are you being so nice to me, Edward?”

    He shrugged. “Because I think you’re kind, and amusing, and beautiful--”

    A few things.

    One, surprisingly, Edward didn’t often think of the words coming out of his own mouth because he was often so occupied by other people’s thoughts inside his head. That was why he had admitted that he thought you were beautiful.

    Two, you had been thinking that question so loud and so repetitively that Edward didn’t hear any of your other thoughts as you got into his car.

    Three, you thought of something else so quickly before acting that Edward didn’t have time to react accordingly.

    But Edward has super speed. Shouldn’t he be able to react fast no matter what? Well, not with what you had in store for him. With what you thought, Edward needed at least a second to think before reacting.

    You had kissed Edward.

    Yes, he needed that one second to process what was happening. Edward also needed another second to get his body to react.

    He pulled away from you and got out of the car. Edward tried his best to get your scent out of his system.

    You got out of the car too. “I am so, so sorry. I think--I guess I misread the messages and assumed--I’m so sorry.” You started walking in the school’s direction.

    Your thoughts were a mess. Never had Edward heard as much self-hatred that wasn’t aimed at himself.

    He used his vampire speed to catch up to you before you turned around. “Y/n.”

    When you faced him, you briefly wondered how he had gotten to you so fast. But, just as you had done with Edward, he didn’t give you time to think.

    He placed both hands on either side of your face (avoiding your pulse) and leaned toward you.

    Truthfully, Edward was leaning in a little slow in fear of his blood lust, but then he heard your thoughts.

    “He’s going to kiss me! Yes!”

    That made Edward fully smile before he pressed his lips to yours.

    The kiss lasted about seven seconds.

    When you separated, you commented, “This is insane.”

    “Sweetheart,” he smiled, “You have no idea.”

*******

Author’s Note: Thank you so much for reading! Fill up that heart and reblog if you liked it. I would also really appreciate a comment, if you have the time, if you would like to read more, check out my masterlist over on my page. Have a nice day, night, or whatever time it is for you! <3 <3 <3

[lalaverdecia]

My Thoughts On The ‘Ghosts’ Season 3 Finale

🎶 Guess who’s back, back again, the Ghosts-obsessed-bitch-who’s-still-super-salty-about-the-writers-breaking-up-Isaac-and-Nigel-like-what-the-hell-why-would-you-do-that… tell a friend 🎶

Why hello fellow Ghosts fans. Isn’t this just a lovely surprise. I haven’t posted anything about Ghosts since before the season 3 finale. And I think we can all guess why that is. But I will get to that in a minute.

Firstly, I wanna address something before y’all read my Ted Talk/emotionally fulled rant. I needed to take a break from the Ghosts fandom all together before collecting myself. The reason why I did that is because I realized I was too obsessed with the show. I get pretty into certain fandoms but with Ghosts it was different for some reason. And because of that, I did something incredibly stupid and wrong. I was so upset with how the season ended, I went to Twitter (or X fuck you Elon) and started blasting Joe Port (one of the producers of the show) for it. I was saying ‘how dare you fucking do this, don’t you know how important this show is to people?!’ And it was during this hate filled rant that I suddenly realized, I had a problem. And I was taking it out on others. I immediately stopped and deleted the tweets and messaged him apologizing for my behavior. It was NOT okay of me to do that and I’m so ashamed that I was capable of doing something so beneath me. So I decided I needed to take a step back from the Ghosts fandom before coming back. I’m still a huge fan of the show, don’t worry, but I’m working really hard on trying not to let my emotions affect other people. I can be a huge fan of something but without being a dick about it basically.

So with that being said, let’s discuss the big ass elephant in the room.

HUGE DISCLAIMER:

These thoughts on the show are just my personal opinion and in no way trying to dictate how the series should go. Please do not go and harass anybody who works for the show like I did.

3x10 ‘Isaac’s Wedding’ Discussion

Oh boy was I upset. Isaac left Nigel at the altar and decided to break up with him. He explained how he thinks there’s something missing in their relationship and decides he can’t be with Nigel without that something. This didn’t just upset me, it seemed to upset a LOT of people. And for good reason I might add. It seemed to fall into the ‘Bury The Gays’ trope that television seems to do too often.

(I couldn’t post the link for some reason but here’s what the video looks like for reference)

In this video, it explains what ‘Bury The Gays’ means and the origins of it. It also gives examples on the different types of tropes there are here. Where Isaac and Nigel seem to fall under is the ‘Miserable LGBTQ+ Lives’ one. It explains that these queer characters face way too much angst and turmoil before/if they can even be happy.

Now I know, Isaac and Nigel come from a different period in time so it’s to be expected that they’re a bit set in their ways. But the amount of progress they’ve made up until 3x10 seems to have been thrown out the window. Along with why Isaac decided to break things off. It’s implied by the writers, BSJ, and the characters in the show themselves, that one of the reasons for why it ended was because Isaac had just realized he was gay and went for one of the only other gay male ghost at Woodstone.

But there’s the huge problem with that. For two and a half centuries, Isaac and Nigel have been pining over each other. Isaac may not have been openly gay but knew that he was in love with Nigel and vice versa. In 1x08 D&D the other ghosts explain to Samantha that their playful back and forth flirting has been going on since they both died. It wasn’t out of convenience because they were both attracted to the same gender, it was because they both genuinely liked each other. Hell, even before they both died, Isaac was spying on Nigel in his camp because he was infatuated by him. He had no idea Nigel was gay as well and probably didn’t at first when they died. But along the way, he seemed to have started to pick up on the fact that Nigel liked him too, but didn’t want to say anything out loud. There’s also other gay male ghosts that he could have pined over. (AKA Jenkins, George, and let’s be honest I wouldn’t be surprised if one of or all the other main male ghosts were queer in some way) So no, their love was NOT out of convenience thank you very much.

Nigel’s Character Arc (or lack there of)

People have mixed feelings about Nigel as a character. Some say he’s the best side ghost character in the show. Others say he sucks and is one of the worst characters.

Ever since Nigel first appeared in season 1, his past and personal information have always been up to debate. He has yet to have an episode or an A or B plot dedicated to just him and learning about him as a person. Most of the time, he is seen around Isaac. Rarely is he alone with the other ghosts in the mansion. Yes he established the ant watching club with Thor and Pete but it would have never really happened if it wasn’t for the conflict between Isaac and Thor in 2x01 ‘Spies’.

You’d think with the fourth season coming out in October, we would have learned a lot more about Nigel by now. All the main ghosts have already had an episode centered around them. Now you can argue and say that Nigel has had that with 1x08 ‘D&D’ when he was first introduced, but even then it was mainly about Isaac and learning that he had killed Nigel and trying to apologize to him for it.

Like stop and think for a second here: can you name 3 things about Nigel’s personal life besides being in the Revolutionary War? Where did he grow up? (And yes I know it would be somewhere in Britain I’m asking where specifically) What was his family dynamic like? Was he ever married? Did he have children? What kind of jobs did he use to have if at all before the war? When did he realize he was gay? How did this affect him when he was alive? Was he open to others about being gay? Or did he have to hide it to protect himself during a time and place where being queer was really dangerous for people? Okay I get that the last few questions are too personal to just bring up in conversation but you get my point. We barely know ANYTHING about the guy!

So What Now? And How Isaac And Nigel Can Fix Their Relationship

Now, y’all are gonna be shocked to hear this from me, but after doing some thinking and consideration, I’m actually kinda glad Isaac and Nigel are taking a break.

WHAT?! I hear you say?

Look, am I happy with HOW they broke up? Absolutely not! The writers could have done a much better job at hinting to the break up between Isaac and Nigel. But instead they just sprung it onto us at the last possible second. But what’s done is done, so the big question is what’s next?

Back to why I’m sorta glad Isaac and Nigel broke it off. They both need some time apart to sort themselves out. Because let’s be honest, as cute as they are together, it could be better. For example, their communication skills need improvement. Like, by a lot. They just need to say upfront what they both want and need from the other person and speak up when one of them crosses a line. But in order to get there, they need to be apart from each other to work on their own personal issues first.

Nigel may be the more open and laid back person in the relationship, but he has a few problems he needs to recognize and work on. Like his temper. He’s not rude or abusive, god no, he just tends to get upset a little too quickly. (We on the ‘Ghosts’ discord server have described this as him being feisty. He’s a feisty little crumpet) Another issue Nigel has is his forwardness. What I mean by this is that Nigel seems eager to move quickly in his relationship with Isaac. Wanting to share a room/bed, wanting physical intimacy, etc. Which on its own isn’t a bad thing. But when you get into a relationship with someone (especially when the other person hasn’t been in a gay relationship before) you don’t wanna rush into things. And Nigel needs to recognize this before getting back together with Isaac.

But now on to Isaac…

My god where do I begin.

Anyone who has ever seen the show knows this man’s got some problems. He has some toxic traits he needs to fix ASAP. Some petty, narcissistic traits but others being internal struggles with his identity and trying to find out what he REALLY wants with a partner. Now his internal issues aren’t the problem, it’s how it’s effecting his relationships. His way of thinking led him to be engaged to Nigel too quickly. Instead of taking his time and realizing, ‘Wait, I literally have forever to figure myself out’, he felt it was necessary to propose to Nigel because he was worried about sharing a room with him. So it made it easier for him to justify sharing space with him because that’s what married couples do. But when he realized he made that mistake, it was too late. He and Nigel were at the altar and Isaac had to break things off before he could hurt Nigel even more than if they were married. As hard as it was, he knew he couldn’t afford to put Nigel in an unhappy marriage like he thinks he did with Beatrice.

And it’s not just Nigel he has had problems with, it’s with almost everyone else in the mansion. I mean, he dumped Crash’s head in a tree stump because he was bored. He wanted Jay to dedicate his restaurant to him and theme it around HIM. He does care about others yes, but he is also really selfish and needs to work on that before getting back together with Nigel.

CONCLUSION

Phew 😮‍💨

This was the longest ‘Ghosts’ post I ever made. And exactly 3 months after season 3 ended. And I didn’t even plan for that. I hope you enjoyed my spiel or Ted Talk or whatever you wanna call it.

I’m not sure what season 4 will bring, but we can all agree on one thing…

We better get another Nisaac kiss because we’ve only gotten 1 so far throughout this entire show like EXCUSE ME?!

[zabala0z]

Okay. So. Hi. I’m your host who is rethinking life??? Or just thinking a lot right now, my brain got so much information. I would’ve posted sooner but I needed a couple hours to get my bearings yall ⛹️‍♀️ anyways! The final 4 episodes of TMA s2!!!

I’m not gonna do my usual format but to start with: I knew Elias was a bastard. I knew it, I CALLED IT. I mean it was pretty obvious but I’m just happy I figured it out. Although I’m very destroyed over the fact Sasha is definitely dead. Like I heard Dekker in MAG 78 and even then I was still in denial until Leitner said “yeah no she’s dead”

In MAG 79, I’m mostly pissed at Michael. Like the moment it put Tim and Martin through its creepy ass doors, I was just like full wheezing out of shock. I wheezed a lot today. Michael does not seem to know shit about humans too since it was like “I…I think it’s called a sport”. Love Michael but also stop being so cryptic oh my god. Also Not Sasha was low key horrifying. Like props to Michael and Not!Sashas voice actors because man I have never felt my muscles seize up like I did when hearing them.

Not Sasha mentioned like being sent to the house of its enemy that had the biggest eyes you ever saw. I thought the enemy was the institute but later I found out…no. Oh yeah! Mag 80! What the hell!

Jurgen Leitner being like “yeah my assistants kinda were killed a lot” like okay go supporting boss. I did not predict it was LEITNER who was living in the tunnels. It’s nice he worked with Gertrude though.

Also, these entities. Again, I was vaguely aware of some since their name was thrown around but I didn’t really realize the extent. Jon mentioned Michael and Leitner refers to it as “The Distortion” and that’s its part of “The Spiral”. AND THATS WHERE FRACTALS COME FROM. God.

Also, when Leitner and Elias are talking, Leitner talks about “the Stranger” and Elias asks what they call it which is “The Unknowing”. The last episode, Not Sasha says that Jon will miss the Unknowing but he wouldn’t understand so I’m assuming the replacement things fall under The Stranger

One final thing I noticed was that he mentioned his assistants getting killed on that day of the attack and all the ways they got killed or I dunno attacked, corresponds with different themes from other statements

“Stabbed through the throat by something with too many teeth and weird limbs”- the replacement things (The Stranger)

“Pulled into a cavernous maw that opened beneath her”- I think this is related to The Butchers Window where Jared Hopworth would throw bones down that pit with teeth

“Gregory Todd ran into a door that shouldn’t have been there”- Michael. What are you doing 💀 (The Spiral)

“A great hand reached down through the roof” -I actually don’t know. Thought it was Freefall but misremembered it.

“Pulled into a great, pulsating pile of meat”- literally every episode with a meat theme. (EDIT 9/2/24: this is related to MAG 18 actually!)

“Doors with darkness and doors on fire”- so the cult I think is related to the darkness but with the fire, I know that Burned Out and that statement with Agnes could be related

So I’m guessing every way an assistant like got killed is one of those entities. I know The Vast is somehow related because Michael Crew mentioned that name before throwing himself out the window and then like changing. Guess he’s like a servant now or something?

Oh god that’s most of it. I’m wondering where Jon is now and I hope Tim and Martin don’t like fully believe he murdered a man. Also I swear to god, Elias, if I catch you. Like Leitner was not a super good guy but come on. I’m glad Not Sasha is gone but…my OG girl 😔😔😔

if you got this far in reading me descend down into my little obsession thank you 🫶🫶🫶 like all this is for fun but everyone I talked to in this fandom is so chill and doesn’t try to spoil which is nice. As someone who was in crazy fandoms, this is pretty calm for such a horrifying media. I’ll probably continue these posts for s3 but I’ll try to condense it I swear guys.

[watchingyoufromthestars]

Finally cleaned this up so here’s my DnDads ultimate ship opinions list. I was waiting until after s2 ended to clean this up in case I had any final opinion changes with the last few episodes. Please don’t bash me for any of these. The DnDads fandom is generally very nice but shipping discourse is something that can get heated no matter the fandom.

Dads

Henry Darryl: very neutral. I understand the ship I just never fully got on the boat

Henry Glenn: absolutely fucking feral about them do not get me started on Glennry

Darryl Glenn: feral in a different way that I don’t know how to describe other than toxic yaoi in the way that they’re damaged but refuse to talk about it so they kiss about it instead

Loveeeeeeee polydads but only as Henry/Glenn/Darryl. Not really a Ron shipper I love him and Samantha too much. Ron and Glenn’s friendship is very important to me though

In terms of Jodie, I don’t really ship him with any of the main dads, ESPECIALLY not Glenn. Even if Jimmy didn’t play Jodie I’d still never ship them. Wish Scamster was real and not completely a scam because they’re literally a crackship become real except it was never a crackship before canon. It’s surprising to me that they weren’t really shipped beforehand

Henry Mercedes: THE T4T OF ALL TIME BABEYYYYY. Absolutely iconic couple, fate was in their favor with how they met they were destined for each other

Darryl Carol: After hearing how Darryl talked about his family in Heaven, I was actually really happy they ended up not getting divorced. They clearly had a rough patch as seen in s1, but they genuinely love each other and I love how devoted to her Darryl is. The little finger puppet he made of her in the time out zone… :,)

Glenn Morgan: GLORGAN!!!!!!!!! Oh my god these two tear me apart. I am feral for Glorgan angst there’s too much to work with. More people need to start calling them Glorgan instead of Morglenn please please please please pretty please indulge me in my silly ship name

Ron Samantha: sobbing. They’re so sweet. The distinction that Samantha is also a little silly is very important to me. They love each other so fucking much

Kiddads

Nicky Sparrow: didn’t realize how much I love them for a good while but when I did oh god I love them so so much. T4T it’s so real to me that they’re both trans

Nicky Lark: used to like it but yall mischaracterize Nicky so much in fics. If yall want toxic yaoi just ship Grant and Lark I’m so serious

Nicky Terry: sobs. They were best friends. I don’t personally ship them but the fact that Terry said he was his best friend… that line rattles around in my brain so often

Nicky Grant: recently learned this might get shipped and has THE coolest ship name. Crossfire I love you but for the ship name alone

Sparrow Terry: I think I’ve seen this shipped a few times but only in the context of Terry/Nicky/Sparrow. Not my personal cup of tea though

Sparrow Grant: I don’t see this shipped too often but they have the worst ship name ever /aff. Wtf is a spant lol. Also I’m too much team transfem Sparrow to feel comfortable shipping this

Lark Terry: do not know the appeal of Gun Control but their ship name is fun

Lark Grant: toxic yaoi central. They both need intense therapy but them both being so fucked up is what makes them interesting not that that’s healthy though

Terry Grant: I see them more in a qpr place than anything romantic. I have one fic of them that’s bookmarked on Safari because I think about a part from it from time to time

Don’t have any poly ships for them

In terms of s2 spouses I so desperately wished we could’ve seen more of them. We barely get to see them

Nicky Cassandra: Telling Taylor his dad was a good man and that she misses him every day makes me think they parted on good terms. But then Nicky disappeared because of FBI shit. In another life maybe they could’ve worked.

Sparrow Rebecca: more ugly sobbing. I’m unsure on my sparroace thoughts if they’d end up getting divorced post-finale but I know they’re not fully separating or breaking up. They really are in love but it’s unconventional and messy.

Terry Veronica: I think the reveal that Terry is infertile is a nice touch to their relationship. It sounds weird to say and I feel like I might word this all weirdly. Him being unable to have bio kids but finding love in someone who wants to raise a kid with him anyways. Veronica finding new love again after a supposedly abusive relationship. Both of those combined is something I really love.

Grant Marco: Canon gays ftw. The Titanic episode was so generous in letting us get to see their dynamic. Obviously Grant still has a long way to go in finding self love but I’m so happy he found someone who can support him and loves him back like this.

Teens

Normal Scary: ugly sobbing over them I love them so much. Cradling my madomagi and tma aus with them as madohomu and jmart

Normal Taylor: yearning for the early s2 days like when they went to Sonic and made some devious plan off screen I wish they had more silly interactions together. Was truly fed with the kareoke intro and them bonding over costume making for a minute. Tayloak could be so interesting if there was more material to work with

Normal Link: Childhood BFFs to Lovers; I wish they could’ve hung out more as kids but all that happened

Normal Hermie: I get the hype but I have personal reasons for feeling neutral on them that I wish I could get over. Good soup though /ref

Scary Taylor: see them too much as a sibling dynamic to ever ship them

Scary Link: respect to all y’all shippers but I do not gothcleats and will leave it at that forever. I can only accept the finale with my transfem Link hc

Scary Hermie: I love Scene Partners. These stupid kids and reflecting each other /aff

Taylor Link: one that I can’t believe I didn’t ship sooner they’re so silly

Link Hermie: I think this one is very funny (/pos) but not my personal vibe

Love love LOVEEEEEEEE Marloakworthy AUGH. A giant triangle of everyone paralleling each other

Polywagon I love you; cannot believe you’re real and genuinely canon. This is just Homestuck again when Hussie said all ships are canon (DnDads never beating the Homestuck allegations from me)

Scary Erica: wish there were more interactions I love Erica so much but alas she’s a guest NPC. “You awaken a lightness in me” sapphic ass Scary I know what you are

[canislupus-exe]

Made for Each Other | eddie munson

fandom | Stanger Things

character | Eddie Munson

reader | he/him/amab (she/her/afab ver.)

requested | anonymous

warnings | smut/nsfw, mutual perversion, peeping, mild degradation

word count | 1,804

keys | (Y/n) = Your name

summary | can u maybe do an eddie munson smut where the reader catches him masturbating to a polaroid of him and then the reader fucks him 👉👈

editor | @feliscatus-exe

>> back to prev <<

Keep reading

You sighed as you checked your watch, the time read 9:17. The day had been surprisingly slow so you decided to hang out with your best friend, but found his company had barely changed that fact. You’d burned through two movies with him and were going to start a third when he suddenly realized something and bolted out of the room. 

That was a few minutes ago and now you were waiting for his return, sprawled out on his bed. You yawned and laid your head against the pillow. Nothing happened until finally, you heard the bedroom door open. You lifted your torso and leaned on your elbows, raising your eyebrows at him. A bright flash caused you to blink rapidly and groan.

“Dude, what the hell?” You asked, sitting up fully and rubbing your eyes. You could hear Eddie laugh before feeling the bed shift as he sat next to you.

“Ain’t he a beaut?” He asks. You stop rubbing your eyes and look at what’s in his hand. It’s a Polaroid picture of yourself. Your shirt is slightly lifted and your pajama bottoms are slightly misplaced, revealing a small bit of your hip area. Your eyelids are slightly drooped, making you look sleepy and even somewhat sultry.

“When did you get a Polaroid?” You asked.

“I found it at the thrift store just outside of town. I seriously couldn’t believe my luck. It was a little busted right here, see, but nothing some duct tape couldn’t fix.” He raved, showing you all parts of the camera. You smiled fondly.

“That’s awesome Eddie.” You say, handing him the picture. He looks at it for a couple of seconds before looking back up at you.

“You don’t want to keep this?” He asks. You shake your head.

“Nah, what purpose do I have for a picture of myself?”

“Wouldn’t I have even less of a purpose for a picture of you?” He asks with a laugh. You shrug and smile.

“I don’t know. Use it to remember me or if you miss me.” You say with a snicker.

“That’s the corniest shit I’ve ever heard,” Eddie replied. You laughed before standing up from the bed.

“I should probably go home now Eddie. It’s getting late and we have school tomorrow.” You say, grabbing your car keys from his nightstand. 

“Already?” He asks a twinge of sadness in his voice. You smile.

“I’ll be back, probably sooner than you even realize. Thanks for letting me hang and keep you company though.” You said. He nodded and stood from the bed, walking you toward his front door.

You said bye and locked up his door, hopping in your car and starting it up. Your house wasn’t too far from the trailer park, which you were thankful for. It made your visits to his place that much more convenient. You whistled to the song on the radio, mindlessly tapping your steering wheel while focusing on the road.

As you pulled up to a crossroad to take a right turn, you realized how cold you were. You always kept your windows rolled down when you drove but it was much chillier than usual. You were about to turn when it dawned on you that you left your jacket at Eddie’s house. No wonder I’m freezing, you think to yourself as you pop a quick U-turn and backtrack to the trailer park.

It doesn’t take long since you didn’t get very far. In a matter of six minutes, you’re putting your car back in park in Eddie’s driveway. You toss your keys in your jean pocket, knocking on his door. There’s no answer, and you can’t help but assume he’d fallen asleep. Normally, you wouldn’t intrude, but the freezing Indiana temperatures urged you to use the spare key he’d gifted you years ago. Just for emergencies, he told you, and if you stayed out there any longer without a protective layer you’d freeze your dick off, which was as close to an emergency as you could damn near get.

You opened the door and shut it quietly behind you, not wanting to wake him up. You quickly scanned the living room, searching for your jacket. It was nowhere to be found but you didn’t fret, you probably just left it in Eddie’s room. You walked toward his bedroom door, seconds away from pushing it open when you heard a noise.

Not just any noise, though. A very distinct type of noise that caused your feet to stay planted on the floor and your stomach to meet them there. It was a moan. A moan that no doubt belonged to your best friend. Your heart began to thump louder than it ever has but you tried to drown it out, listening for another noise to prove you weren’t going crazy. 

And there it was again. A whiny, high-pitched moan that sent tingles down your spine and blood rushing to your crotch. You clasped a hand over your mouth in an attempt to regulate your breathing, scared you’d make a noise and alert him that you were here. Which you should’ve done, you knew that. You knew how wrong it was to listen to someone get off, but you couldn’t move your feet.

And to make matters worse, your eyes found themselves drawn to the crack in the door. You weren’t just listening now, you were full-on peeping on your best friend jacking off, and God was it making you hard.

The sliver in the door was small but if you angled yourself just right you could see enough. His right hand rapidly moved up and down his shaft while his left held a picture that looked almost familiar. Further up you could see his shirt lifted and his left hand holding a piece of clothing to his nose, which he was no doubt sniffing with fervor. The item of clothing was also familiar. It almost looked like…

“(Y/n)~” Eddie whined breathlessly, and the air around you seemed to turn cold. That couldn’t have possibly been…

“Fuck- (Y/n)…” He moaned again, and you were sure of it this time. He was, without a shadow of a doubt, moaning your name. That wasn’t the only thing he was doing. As he continued to furiously pump his shaft with his fist you realized why everything looked so familiar. He was holding the Polaroid he took of you earlier and sniffing your jacket. Eddie was masturbating to the thought of you.

“God p-please I need you~” He moaned, panting heavily. You got so warm in the face and so fuzzy in the brain that you acted without thinking. You pushed the bedroom door open and walked in, causing him to yelp and throw everything off of him. He scrambled to pull a blanket over himself to salvage a shred of his modesty but you’d already seen too much.

“Don’t stop on my account sweetheart. In fact, let me help you~” You say, popping the button of your jeans. His face turns bright red, staring at you in utter disbelief.

“(Y-Y/n) I can explain-“

“Explain what? That you were jacking off to a picture of me? Mmm, what did you imagine we were doing Eddie?” You asked, pulling the blanket off as you licked your lips. 

“I-I wasn’t-“

“Come on Eddie~ You can tell me. If you ask nicely, I might even do it to you~” You whisper in his ear, gently placing your hand around his already twitching cock. He gasps and whimpers, covering his mouth to stop the needy noises from spilling out.

“You were so loud before, what happened to ‘I need you’?” You asked, moving your hand up and down his shaft. His eyes rolled into the back of his head as he lowered his hands, babbling for a second as he presumably tried to find the right words.

“I was i-imagining you- ah- fucking me into the- hng- mattress.” He gasped out, balling his hands into the sheets. You smirked, pulling your hand away and watching him practically chase your touch.

“That can be arranged.” You reply, pulling your pants and boxers off all the way. He watched with wide eyes as your cock sprung out, standing at attention and making his mouth water. He watched you bend and spit on his hole, gasping at the sudden cold sensation. You rubbed it into his asshole, expertly spreading him out in seconds and causing him to turn to putty once again. 

Once you were finished prepping him, you positioned your cock head at his tight asshole, teasing by gently prodding it. He whined, staring at you with pleading eyes. You decided to take mercy on him and finally push yourself inside, groaning as he enveloped you. He bit his lip harshly and squeezed his eyes shut, overcome with the pleasure of being filled.

“Look at you, you filthy little pervert. Getting fucked by the guy you were jacking off to.” You practically growled at him, an irregular dominance clouding your mind. He moaned and covered his face, too embarrassed to look you in the eye.

“Maybe we’re made for each other though.” You say somewhat fondly as you pick up your pace. He moans, face still covered, but he manages to get out two words of inquiry.

“W-We are?” He asks meekly. You laugh almost sadistically as you grip his legs.

“We are… wanna know why?” You ask, slowing your hips just the slightest bit to grab his focus.

“Why?” He asks breathlessly.

“Because I’m a pervert too Eddie. I watched you jack off to me. I liked watching you jack off to me.” You say, giving him no time to process what you’ve said before starting to plow into him again. This practically sends him over the edge, whimpering and begging to cum as you fucked into his prostate like never before. He wraps his arms around your back and begins moaning frantically

“Fuck fuck fuck I’m- agghn!” He gasps for air and scratches down your back, body shaking as spurts of cum shoot from the head of his cock. The sounds he’s making and the tightness of his ass proves to be too much as your hips sputter and you let out a low groan, emptying your load straight into his suffocating hole.

You gasp in an attempt to regain your breath, Eddie still latched onto you like his life depends on it. You chuckle and let your body weight fall onto him, electing to clean yourselves up later. You do however decide to plant a gentle kiss on his cheek at the moment, and you’re glad you do when you see his flushed face fondly smile.

[askfischoeder]

What gift would your favorite character most like to receive and what would they give to their loved ones?

Title: You forgot, didn’t you?

Characters: Felix Fischoeder, Calvin Fischoeder

Fandom: Bob’s Burgers

The sun casted golden rays through misaligned dark crimson curtains, the daylight shining through effortlessly on this clear day. Groggy groans escaped through dry lips as reality became more and more of a present thought. The last few days had been such a… blur. Traveling, attending a holiday party- the gingerbread competition had been an absolute blast as well.

Calvin slowly moved under his covers, his robe untied and laid out to expose the faintest portion of his frame, his solid trunk flickered with grey wavy little hairs that thinned the further down his belly. He let out a yawn so deep it made him shiver, before he reached up to push the black silk mask from his face, rubbing his socket mindlessly as he struggled to open his eye in the sun’s rays.

His joints threatened to protest as he slid himself up, legs draping off the bed as he pulled his robe closer and headed to the bathroom. A nice shower, he could already smell breakfast… what did he need to do today again? Calvin glanced around the bathroom floor in annoyance, towels and old laundry scattered about. He’d gotten in super early in the morning, drunk at that, and apparently nobody had came to clean yet.

It wasn’t long before Calvin was finished and dressed in his normal attire, eyepatch over his eye, hair perfectly styled and suit wrinkle-free. A small spray of cologne and he was headed downstairs to gaze at what had been cooked to see if he wanted to eat here, or wait until he got into town. That was until his eye fell on a small white tree, sparkling with golden lights and several crude plastic ornaments.

“What is this..?” He asked in confusion, but nobody answered him. Calvin stepped closer and picked up a small stack of cards. Various tenants, the Belchers had managed to send out their post card in time as well, and then.. Felix. It was a card with a big white cat on it that had on a hat. But his was torn in half. Calvin fumbled to piece the two halves together to read it.

“Dear Calvin,

Merry Christmas! I didn’t see that you put any of my gifts under the tree so I’m hoping it doesn’t fit under the tree! I got you something this year too pal!

Love, Felix Fischoeder”

Calvin’s shoulders slumped as he began to realize Felix had wanted to spend Christmas together. Did he know that? His mind raced for a bit before he pulled out his phone, starting to go through all the missed messages he hadn’t bothered to open. His eye then drifted to the small gift box under the three.

Calvin shoved his phone back into his pocket, setting the card down as he picked up the box. It was ornate, well wrapped. He felt unease but more… guilt then he think he’d ever felt in regards to a holiday. But he stuffed it back, realizing it was just as likely to be a rubber cockroach. But as he undid the ribbons, he revealed a very intimate gift of a jeweled eyepatch that was white. It had crystals and the same coloring of golden bronze that his lovely cape had, but as he lifted it up he realized that it had a black, soft cover where his lid would rub against. Even his daily eyepatch didn’t have that much padding to it.

Guilt consumed Calvin silently as he set the box back down, turning on his heel with intent to go to the treehouse and at least offer to take Felix to go eat- when he saw the sad blue eyes watching him. That same baby face that he’d known for so long, now clenching his fists and trying not to show how hurt he was.

“Oh Felix, buddy… It’s a really good present. I’m-“

“Did you get me anything?”

“Huh? - what? Of course I did!”

“Where is it then Calvin?”

“It’s-.. upstairs! It’s a surprise!”

“You forgot me!” Felix finally yelled, not wanting anymore excuses as he turned around to storm out. Calvin wasn’t up for a chase, but he was soon slumping into his chair with a tired groan.

He didn’t know how he was going to make it up to Felix this time…

[makeitp1nk]

2024 reflections

In stream of consciousness

This might as well be a journal entry

There’s some fandom stuff in blue

Necessity is a bitch, but she’s also the biggest teacher. Had I not needed so much, I wouldn’t have become a part-time handy man this year.

In the race to the bottom, companies no longer build things to last or for minimal repair and upkeep. Things are purposely built to break and be repurchased. They are consciously creating waste, and as a fixer, this disgusts me. My house taught me the extent of this nonsense.

I’m really fucking over the drive for profit > common sense. Greed.

I’ve also realized that I can only think of two people within my organizational hierarchy at work (a VP and C-suite exec) who don’t worry about money. My coworkers, my boss — everyone is convinced they need more for the basics. I earn less than half what my boss does. I’d be dying with gratitude if I had what he does. So when does it stop? When do we achieve satisfaction? When do we stop worrying?

It’s been a supremely lonely year. At times by choice but mostly by circumstance. In group settings, I’ve become okay with just being and not feeling obligated to socialize or participate. I still enjoy myself, and it’s liberating. I’ve come to understand that I crave deep connections, and I’m not someone who can achieve that with many. I’m too much for people.

IRL, I was not placed on this earth to be liked. It’s lonely, but coming to terms with this has empowered and liberated me tremendously.

I think this is reflected in what I write. Every concept and feeling is intrinsically mine. I love writing for a recipient, for one specific person, and that’s made being part of fandom the most satisfying. I miss being more active, I miss my friends, and I miss the chokehold my ships had on my life previously. That’s what I miss the most - the obsession that drives inspiration and connection.

Fandom feels less open and accepting than when I joined. It feels like there are groups of friends cheering each other on but not excited to make new friends. I love seeing the joy and enthusiasm those groups have for each other, it just feels lonely on the outskirts. Lonelier still when I don’t feel the spark and passion I used to.

That doesn’t mean I love my ships any less, it just means my horizons have widened and that passion has spread instead of concentrated. That expansion makes me want so much more - I want to learn Chinese. I want to thrift and up-cycle clothes. I want to spoil my cats more. I want want want want

I grieved the woman I would have been if necessity hadn’t turned me into a Type A person. Maybe she’s born with it, maybe it’s a trauma response.

I put myself last. Towards the end of the year, I started kicking my job lower in my priorities, but I will always jump on something that affects others before I take care of the things I need. This needs to change.

I’ve been giving people out in the world my brightest smile, and it feels really good. I think it takes them by surprise too. It feels like throwing confetti at people.

I feel like I was never allowed to be shy when I was younger, and I’m really leaning into it now. I didn’t realize how much I needed this space to figure out what feels like me.

I’ve developed this rare skill to move and change and influence. I didn’t realize how much power I had until very recently. It’s both validating and terrifying.

I knew going into 2024 that it was going to be a rough one. To be frank, it kicked my ass. My husbands’ too. It’s 2am on the last day of the year. It’s pretty much over.

It’s starting to feel silly, this way of marking time. But having milestones and times to reflect is nice.

On to the next one

If you want to reflect and open up, tag me - I’d love to read yours ❤️

[klbwriting]

Our Strange Duet

Chapter 1: Getting Out of Bed

Fandom: Red Hood

Pairing: Jason Todd x f!reader

Warnings: none

Summary: Sequel to Not Romeo, Not Juliet - Jason Todd is off to Gotham U to make sure he has a life outside of being a vigilante. He wasn't expecting someone from his past to show up, but there she is on the first day and things have changed

Notes: Well, I was going to wait until tomorrow but I can't, I like this too much, I hope you guys enjoy!

Taglist: @deans-spinster-witch

It's the bitch of living, just getting out of bed - Spring Awakening

               “Jason, get up, you have class in half an hour,” Dick called up to the loft as he finished setting out the terrible eggs he made whenever Jason slept late.  He sat up in bed, looking at his phone, sighing as it had no notifications, well it had one text but not from the person he wanted one from.  Sydney wished him a happy first day of classes and he answered before getting dressed.  He skipped the eggs, grabbing an apple and throwing out a quick bye to his brother as he headed down to the garage for his bike. 

               He had finished high school and after a long and drawn argument with Dick about not just living as a vigilante his whole life and maybe having some kind of day job for when his knees finally buckled under the weight of trying to save an entire city.  So here he was driving his bike towards Gotham University, taking all general education courses because he had no idea what he wanted to try and do for a career.  He did know that he was going to be in theater, his director from Bludhaven Prep had written him a great recommendation letter, but only if he continued to act, and honestly, he wanted to act.  It was nice to become someone else, take a break from his brain.  His therapist liked it also, said it helped Jason get out of his head.  What he didn’t expect was walking into his first class, Modern Literature 101 and sitting by the window in the front corner, was YN. 

               She wasn’t looking at him, reading one of the books for the class, doing notations.  After a second Jason realized he was blocking the door so he slid around to the back corner of the class, sitting before she could look up.  He watched her, concentrating on her book and every single emotion he felt last year came flooding back.  She had left, they kept in touch until around May and then she had vanished.  He didn’t know why but he had a bad feeling about it.  He wouldn’t confront her now, but he hoped he could snag her after class, speak with her, just see how she was.  He stared at her until he heard his name, looking up to the professor.

               “Mr. Todd?” she repeated.  He smiled awkwardly, clearly having missed the first time she said his name.

               “Ya that’s me,” he said.  He looked down and then looked at YN who was staring back at him, eyes wide.  He waved a little and she turned, facing forward again, leg starting to bounce like it did when she was anxious.  The syllabus was handed out and he proceeded to ignore his teacher, instead categorizing how YN had changed in the last eight months.  Hair was longer, she leaned on her hand, eyes looking tired, she had car keys sitting on her desk, so she drove now.  She glanced back at him, and he tore his eyes away from her, trying to focus on class.  As soon as they were dismissed he tried to bounce up and catch her but two people in front of him started talking and he couldn’t get around them fast enough.  By the time he got into the hallways she was gone. 

               He had two other classes that day, but YN wasn’t in either of them.  The only hope he had was the theater meeting that night for the Gotham U Players.  They were doing a sign up and talking about their productions that year, so Jason got there early, signed up quickly and then looked around the room.  He was first beside the upper classmen advisors, so he took a seat near the door.  She would be here, and she wasn’t going to sneak by him again.  He waited, the place filling up with other university students.  They started and about three minutes into the meeting YN came in, signing up quick and sitting down two rows in front of Jason, once again preventing him from talking to her. 

               This was pathetic, was he going to just chase her around all year until she talked to him?  He wasn’t a stalker, but he was considering seeing if Dick could get her address before he got home so that he could go knock on her door.  But that would be bad.  He shook himself, coming back to the meeting where they announced that the first production this year was going to be a musical.  Jason’s eyebrows rose so high they probably disappeared into his hair.  He had not considered a musical, ever.  He looked down at YN, catching her turning to look back at him, whipping her head forward when she saw him watching.

               “Auditions for Phantom of the Opera are next week, come with a song prepared and remember, if you are not cast you are part of the stage crew and we will be having you learn to be directors, sound techs, light techs, and set design so don’t be discouraged.  And in the spring we will do a play so those who can’t sing will still get time on stage,” the club president announced before dismissing them.  Jason once again jumped up, ready to grab her but this time she swerved him by taking a side door.  He jumped a couple rows, racing out the door after her, probably looking insane, but he didn’t care.

               “YN!” he called, chasing after her as she walked towards the parking lot.  She took a couple steps before stopping.  He ran around in front of her, panting a little from running to catch her.  Why did cardio only work when he was chasing criminals?

               “Hi Jason,” she said, and he could have sworn he heard angels singing in her voice.  He missed it so much.  “Didn’t know you were coming here.”

               “Ya, well, here I am, why you trying to get away from me?” he asked.  She chuckled a little, always right to the point, no small talk for him.

               “I wasn’t trying to get away from you, I was surprised and was trying to figure out if you hated me.  The way you were staring in class I was freaked out, you used to give that look to Chelsea and them when they annoyed you, its so intense,” she said.  Jason blushed some, shrugging.

               “I didn’t mean to look like that, I just…well you did kind of ghost me and it is a bit annoying,” he said.  She looked down and he could have kicked himself.  “But I mean, I know you probably had a reason…”

               “My mom died,” she said.  He froze.  “The treatment in Singapore, it didn’t take.  We stayed there because it would have been too destabilizing for her to travel home so the donor made sure she was comfortable there until the end and then I came back in May.”

               “Why didn’t you call me?” he asked.  She bit her lip, wiping her eyes quick.

               “I wasn’t in a good headspace at the time.  I came back and I thought about calling you, but then I found Sydney’s social media and saw you guys together and figured you didn’t need me coming in and ruining that with my grief.  I figured you had moved on I should too,” she explained.  O no.  He hung his head a little.

               “I was never dating Sydney,” he said.  “She um, is not exactly into guys.”  Her eyes looked up at him.  “She mostly posted pictures with me to make Jackson leave her alone until graduation.”  YN blushed.

               “Well don’t I feel petty, jealous, and stupid,” she said.  Jason laughed.  “Well, either way I still wasn’t in a good headspace, I needed counseling and to figure myself out before school started.  I promised my mom I would go to school no matter what, so here I am.”

               “Where are you staying?” he asked. 

               “I have an apartment off campus in Old Gotham, the grant money from the Leading Lady award should pay for it and my school for a year and then I’ll figure something else out,” she explained.  “What about you?  Still living with Dick?”

               “Ya, still living with Dick,” he said.  “Um, would you maybe want to hang out sometime?”  She looked worried, biting her lip.  He was tempted to kiss her but had to pull himself back.  She was different now, he was different now, who knows how much that changed how they felt about each other. 

               “Sure, I’m free this weekend, still trying to get a new job since the pool I worked at in the summer is closed now,” she said.  He nodded.  “Let me give you my new number, I had to change it because Maroni kept calling.”

               “So, you’re not next in line in the family yet?” he asked as she put her number into his phone.

               “God no, he contacted me, tried to convince me to join him but had no leverage since my mom was being taken care of,” she said.  Jason motioned for her to walk to the lot, walking with her to her car.  It looked a bit like a death trap.  “Its not much but it runs.  You still on the bikes?”  He pointed to his bike a few spaces down.  “Thought that was yours when I got here.  Do you still do the other stuff you did?”  She tapped her head and he assumed she meant being Red Hood.

               “Ya, nightly,” he answered.  She smirked a little.  “But now I have to have Dick stitch me up, so much less cool scars.” 

               “You needed someone better than me for that,” she said.  He shrugged.  “Well, I guess I’ll see you around.  Text me, ok?” He nodded and watched her drive away.  His heart sped up a little when he thought about the fact that he was going to be able to see her at least a few times a week, maybe every day.  He hadn’t thought college would be that exciting, but things were about to change, he could feel it.