#I cried when I got home
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I got myself this haircut for my birthday and I just wanted to say I’m proud of myself
#talking#but also a#selfie#me#my face#I’ve wanted this for a long ass time#14 year old me is healing#I cried when I got home#I’m finally growing into the person I want to be for me and I’m so proud of myself#it glows under black light#I’m going to look sick as fuck for a while#anyways#cute#neon orange hair#living my scene teen dream#happy 25th to me
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just saw quadeca live i can now die happy (my ears are ringing like hell)
#quadeca#QUAD DID!!!!!!!#it was genuinely so good#i am honoured to have been at his first canada show#i cried when i got home
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I met miss bria yesterday and we spent the whole day out being silly girls and I miss her so bad it hurts @planetsano
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I met my hero and I didn’t throw up on him like I thought I was gonna do I just stared at him like an idiot and also I didn’t get to ask the questions I wanted to ask because I was freaking out my voice tends to get all messed up when I’m overwhelmed but he noticed my prop knife (I cosplayed as himiko toga) and jokingly asked what I was going to do with it and I said I might change into him and he was all like “we’ll see” and I just AGGHH CURSE YOU AUTISM AND ANXIETY FOR RUINING MY PERFECT DAY! And other reasons I can’t say ! I practiced in the mirror of how to hold a conversation with him and i couldn’t even do that right but I’m glad I met him I’m so grateful I did and I think everyone should meet him ! He’s so sweet and he’s pretty funny
ALSO DEADNAME ALERT PLEASE DO NOT USE IT
(my own fault couldn’t choke out my own name)
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#star trek#star trek the next generation#data soong#data star trek#brent spiner#he is so nice#and kind#i appreciated the hug from him#and the kind words#actually autistic#my autistic ass#got too overwhelmed#I cried when I got home#mostly out of frustration#it should not be this hard#to talk
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Pac: Take care of Ramon, take care of Richas, ok? See you on the other side, big boy.
Fit: [Laughs] Take it easy, big boy. Take it easy, big boy. Actually, nononono– You can't just say "big boy" and then just expect me to not drag you outta here. [Fit tries to lasso Pac] You're coming with me.
Pac: No, I need to leave!
Fit: You're coming with me. You are not dying today! You are not dying today!
Pac: I need to leave, Fit! I'm sorry, I'm sorry!
Ironmouse: Are you guys like, having sexy time?
Fit: There's homosexual activity going on Mouse, don't worry about us, ok?
Ironmouse: You guys, we don't have time to be gay right now.
[ Full Transcript ↓ ]
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Pac: I'm just here to say goodbye to you, Fit.
Fit: Goodbye? We're not– we're gonna be fine, we're going to get out of here, don't worry.
Aypierre: Yeah, don't worry!
Pac: I know, but like– I will sleep until the end, you know? I will pass through this moment sleeping, man. I won't be able to be awake for the moment.
Fit: [Laughs] You know, it's– I mean, if that's how you wanna go, but– I mean, that- I mean, isn't that bed kind of like.... I don't know, it's–
Pac: No no, I will be staying on the sofa, you know, I will be staying on the sofa.
Fit: Oh the sofa. Ok, that's a nice sofa! Yeah, that is a pretty nice sofa.
Pac: Yeah, it's a nice sofa right? No, yeah– I'm going to stay on the sofa, you know? So, since I will be going Fit... [Pac starts tossing Fit all his items]
Aypierre: [Not paying attention to their conversation] Is that bigger cell? I don't think it's a bigger- biggest one.
Fit: Oh... Thank you Pac, thank you.
Pac: Everything you need to survive, ok?
Fit: Wow.
Aypierre: Wow.
Pac: And if you need this one also, maybe, who knows? [Throws him more items]
Fit: Ohhh, well hey– just take this to remember me by, ok? [Tosses him a photo of himself – the same one Aypierre was carrying all day yesterday]
Pac: [Laughs] Ok, I will sleep holding the picture you know, like this. You know, I will dream about you, Fit. And I hope this is gonna be good dreams. I see you in the other side. Good luck, my friend.
Fit: The other side... Yeah, you know, yeah, we– we– you know? It's been an honor, Pac. It's been an honor, you know?
Pac: Yeah, for me too, you know? Take care of Ramon, take care of Richas, ok?
Fit: Ok.
Pac: See you on the other side, big boy.
Fit: I will sing your praise– Oh yeah, hey– [Laughs] Take it easy, big boy. Take it easy, big boy. Actually, nononono– You can't just say "big boy" and then just expect me to not drag you outta here. You're coming with me.
Pac: No, I need to leave!
Fit: You're coming with me. You are not dying today! You are not dying today!
Pac: I need to leave, Fit! I'm sorry, I'm sorry!
Fit: Sorry, there's–
Pac: I'm sorry!
Ironmouse: Are you guys like, having sexy time?
Fit: There's homosexual activity going on Mouse, don't worry about us, ok?
Ironmouse: You guys, you guys– we don't have time to be gay right now, come on. There's no time.
Pac: No, there's no time! Oh, goodbye Fit...
Fit: Ok, c'mon, no no no, come on, we got this we got this!
Pac: Goodbye Fit, I'm sorry!
Fit: [Laughs] Oh no...
#Pactw#FitMC#Hideduo#FitPac#QSMP#QSMP Prison#January 22 2024#So canonically how do you guys view this moment?#Did Pac just canonically conk out from stress?#Did he take sleeping pills on purpose to sleep through whatever awful thing was inevitably going to happen?#Curious to hear what other people think#I like to imagine the stress finally got to him#He spent the entire time trying to mirror things he saw Cell doing#and finally cried about it to Bagi#I can't blame him if he wants to sleep through the rest of it. Man's living in a place that's actively making him relive past trauma#Fit says he's carrying Pac in his backpack but I like to imagine that he just gave Pac a piggy back ride the entire way home :D#I imagined that for Purgatory too#it's cute#idk the whole idea of very traumatized characters being so comfortable around certain people#Idk the idea Pac feeling so safe around Fit#(despite being in a place that is actively stressing him out)#that he feels alright falling asleep and trusting him / Mike to protect him is sweet to me#Idk man I'm a big fan of the ''literal sleeping together'' trope#I love when characters take naps together it's so cute#esp when it's two traumatized characters with a lot of baggage / trust issues#It's nice#anyways I got way off topic with these tags LMAO sorry#I was gonna edit this down but I like the entire conversation so I'm leaving it as is#The YouTube editor living in my brain: Not great for viewer retension#Me: Shhhhhhhh I'm an Archivist. I can do whatever I want.
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I hate hate HATE when people say I'm "having an attitude" with them, bc I'm literally not until AFTER they say that. And thats not even "an attitude", it's me being annoyed and frustrated bc youre saying im having an attitude when im NOT.
Like what does that even mean. I'm just autistic.
#blah blah blah#vent#like i was just responding to my name being called???? i literally just went “huh?” which i do all the time?????#and when you walk off mumbling shit that i cant hear bc we're dozens of feet away from each other in a loud ass store#and i come over and ask what you wanted#and youre like “i said we'll talk when you drop the attitude” or whatever and have the audacity to smirk at me like its a joke and i have#any idea wtf youre talking about#like i got so frustrated and upset about it that i legit cried for like an hour after that. while still doing my work bc i just wanna get#done and go home.#this is about one of my managers btw. if it wasn't obvious#like shes cool most of the time. but she says shit sometimes that make me wanna quit on the fucking spot
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#my sister left me a whole bouquet of flowers and a small self-care bag she picked out herself when i got home from work#and it put me in shambles#im so glad my family understands#like my dad said he cried for three weeks straight when elvis passed#and my mom cried for a while after princess diana’s passing#they get it and i’m so thankful for that ❤️🩹
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ohhh god I think my brain’s broken or somethin cos at the sight of all the goddamn 9hr shift Saturdays and 4.5hr shift Sundays in my near future I legit bawled. Like I don’t DO that ok that is WEIRD for me. I miss having weekends. I should be BEING A TEENAGER ON SATURDAYS not standing in a small space for NINE HOURS
I genuinely think this is gonna be what makes me lose it
#the worst part of it all is that it’s literally been two days. like that is pathetic whhhy can’t I just tough it the fuck out oh my godddd#it ain’t even HARD work I just feel like a caged tiger#and so damn borrred#my boss is real nice tho and quitting would seriously be a dick move#like she bought me a soda…:(#I wish I had a good reason to hate it other than the fact that it’s on weekends and is time consuming#but I don’t#I worked at the stable all summer and I didn’t hate that at all. It was gross and dirty#and I was so sweaty and all my clothes smelled like horse for weeks after and fuck man I didn’t even get paid minimum wage#but I liked it. It was real fun (even when I got zapped by the electric fence!)#but I’m in retail now#and after the first day last week I went home and punched a wall hard enough to get a giant bruise#and after today-the second day-I cried like 5x harder than I did last time I freaked out. Fuck man I prayed even and im not even religious#I think somehow my brain registers boredom as a bigger threat than actual danger holy hell#…jesus I /like/ the job w/ the electric fence but lose it at the cushy one with free soda -_-#yeah no my brain’s definitely not wired right I don’t think#ugh#rambling#personal stuff#whining#delete later#oh yeah and I was right I didn’t work out tonight cos I was miserable.#I mean I jogged a tiny bit but my biceps man…what abt my biceps…:((
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hozier starting to sing take me to church and then unfurling a pride flag healed something in me actually
if you listen closely you can hear me yell ‘oh my god’ when he does it
#(don’t listen too closely though I’m a bad singer lol)#I tried to post this Sunday night but it didn’t go through#I had no idea he was going to do it I almost cried#not leverage#hozier#slept at our airbnb for like 4 hours#woke up for an hour until Cumbies would be open so I could get breakfast (5am)#and then drove over 2.5 hours to get back home in time to get prepared for work#I ended up teaching my two hour group and then working till twelve and taking the rest of the day off#I forgot my meds so I slept ten hours until 10 at night 💀#worth it#seeing him was a spiritual experience fr#and this was like SO spontaneous. like I cannot express enough how much I didn’t plan for this#also I literally got my tickets saturday when the show was sunday. thank u stubhub ur a true mvp#I knew my friends were going and were staying overnight and someone in my facebook group was selling tickets last minute and was like 👀👀👀#I’m not gonna go into how she decided to sell to someone else later that day when I had already made plans and made me cry but whatever#it worked out in the end
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to the person who knows me irl and threw blueberry on the ground yesterday
that was Not Cool :(
#pineapple talk tag#i would like you to know i cried a bit and held him close when i got home#i love him so much#don't do that#not a blueberry sans plush#not a blueberry plush#announcement
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my little doggy my special baby boy is getting old and he's almost completely deaf and he gets confused a lot and he sleeps almost all day and I'm cuddling him sooooooooo much while i'm home i hopw he knows howmuch i love him 😭😭😭😭
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NICOLEEEEEEEEE HOW ARE UUUUUUU
LOURDESSSSSSBRRRRRRRRRKRIRJDKRJJKWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONDJD WENT AND STILL GOING INSANEEEEE LEWIS WIN 104 AND I WAS ON THE TRACK I SAW THE PODIUM I SAT AT TURN ONE I SAW THE CROWD SURF I SAW ALEX POINTS BEST DAY EVERERRRRRRR
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#i got home at 2am after the most disastrous journey but nothing can kill my vibe#im still vibrating i literally cried at the main stage when he was speaking it was so emotional im still in the washing machine of emotions#i need to catch up on my dash idk what’s been going on here#asks#lourdes#nicole goes silvo 3.0 x#silverstone 2024
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I also just like my therapist but telehealth therapy has been such a game changer to me. You're telling me I can have whatever beverages and stuffed animals I want right here, and as soon as the session is over I can lie directly down on my bed? Perfect.
#remembering when I would have to take public transit back to my dorm from therapy#and my therapist kinda sucked#so I'd always be like. dissociating in trader joes having visibly recently cried#and then getting on transit with my bag of just various kinds of cookies and having to continue being in public until I got home#WILD#my life
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I put a pacemaker on someone today
#when the years of study works#and there you have it#the guy cried when I said 'yep seems fine'#saving hearts!!!!!! insane!#got home happy today :)#what a time to be alive#sofia in residency
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When do you guys think was the last time Din Djarin cried
#happy or sad tears included#i think he cried happy tears when they finally got to see their home :')#din djarin
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Something is up today and I don't appreciate it.
Had a FUCKASS dream last night that threw my whole day out the window. My hero complex is so strong I actually dreamt that I fucking saved Touya myself, and it was one of those dreams that was so emotionally charged I woke up already exhausted. So that just boned my day from the start.
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And now you're telling me a blog that hasn't posted since fucking February just happens to post TODAY a short story that actually physically hurt me (last reblog).
AND ALSO that post is how I find out the OST of Dabi's dance is on spotify, so of course I listen to it because I'm a moron. Hayashi Yuki, I need to speak with you. The literal /screaming/ you mixed in there?? And now I'm fucking crying.
I am never going to recover from the life of Todoroki Touya.
#I just need a lobotomy at this point I fear#I was so exhausted after work I got home slept for 5 hours woke up and cried#cool cool cool#love days like this for me#horikoshi when i catch you#todoroki family#todoroki touya#dabi#bnha#boku no hero academia#mha#my hero academia
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