#I couldn't find a single good quality picture of him

[susanoos-wife]

"Hey Coyote, what type of men are you into?"

[b5withextrachicken]

FALLING IN LOVE? - JAMAL MUSIALA

pairings: jamal musiala x fem!reader

summary: they were seen kissing at a party but she can't quite remember. now she wants to find out if does.

(i hate this and also english isn't my first language.)

(pictures are not mine)

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Perfection. Pure perfection. That was probably the only word that could describe his performance today.

My eyes were practically glued to the pitch as my gaze followed his every move. He was at his best today, making his way through the defenders, dribbling out every single one of them. That man was sickeningly good on the field, I had to admit as I watched from the stands. The atmosphere was loud, cheering and addicting. Not where I usually spent a friday night but I could get used to it. Especially when the view was this good.

At a party several weeks ago I had befriended another peer group of athletes, temporarly increasing my number of close friends from 2 to 7. Normal, right? Well, no, because when I woke up with a headache the next morning and checked my way-too-bright phone on the nightstand, it was blown up with messages. Whatsapp, Insta, TikTok... even Facebook. Photos, low-quality videos, theories. There were strangers on the internet speculating about me and a boy. That boy. The boy i later found out was Jamal Musiala. The pictures clearly showed me and him. Way too close. But the worst thing was: I couldn't remember what happened that night.

And that's what brought me here today, to the front row of the Allianz Arena. Because since that night, I couldn't help but wonder if he remembered me or anything that happened. I needed to see him.

The game was heated, the tension could've been cut by a knife. A winner wasn't yet clear when the ball made its way to Jamals feet again. Even from across the pitch I could see his expression fall into concentration as he skillfully turned and sprinted through the opposition towards their goal. It was like the whole stadium went quiet as the fans and rivals realised his chance. He moved to a perfect position to aim. Shot. Scored.

The south curve went wild. Fans spilled their beer. Plastic cups flew. Bayern took the lead in the 87th minute, now so close to a home win. The scorer wearing the number 42 on his back ran over to them to celebrate his goal. He was ecstatic, smiling as he got closer to the barricade.

That's when his gaze met mine.

It was sudden. Fast. But for that minuscule second I could see his eyes light up. A telling spark. Was it recognition? Our momentary connection was severed when his team mates finally caught up to him, engulfing him in a wild hug almost sending the young man to the floor. I smiled, deciding to push the heavy thoughts to the back of my mind for now and embrace the warm atmosphere.

..........

The game was over, proudly ending in a 2:1 for Bayern Munich. The masses hurried to the exits, hoping to avoid the cramped traffic after the win. I lingered around, taking my time to collect my things and also to circumvent the crowded halls of the stadium for a little longer. My mind was racing as the stands cleared out, only leaving trash and spilled beer behind. I was about to sip up my jacket when-

"Y/N?"

I practically whirled around at the sudden voice and my gaze (once again) was met by those chocolate brown eyes that belonged to no other than Jamal. He took a small step back startled by my movement and send me an apologetic look for the scare. Now there was a litte more than an arms-length between us.

"Uh-hey!" I answered nervously, a shaky smile painting my lips. This wasn't at all how I imagined our encounter. My eyes scanned his appearance, he wore a baggy tracksuit jacket over his kit, the grass residues on his shorts still evident from the many fouls he had to endure. He hadn't even made it to the locker room. My gaze lingered on his lips before locking with his eyes again.

His mouth stretched into a sweet smile "Hey..."

Awkward silence. A few beats passed. I looked around nervously, my eyes now darting to anywhere but him. What was I supposed to talk about now? The weather?

Jamal also shuffled around nervously, looking down at his cleats. It was clear we both beat around the bush. He looked back up at me, his gaze resembling that of a deer. "So...Why-I mean, what brought you here, I didn't think I'd see you again..." he asked carefully. A blush tainted my cheeks "Uhm, I just... wanted to see you." I started, embarassed "You know, after the party." pausing for a moment, I thought back to the pictures of us kissing, contemplating if I should ask the question and just get it of my chest. Yeah. Best option.

"Do you remember anything about that night? Like what happened exactly? Did we... do something?"

It tumbled out of my mouth, one ask fused to another. I watched as his posture shifted, his eyes slightly widening. "What? No,no,no." he shook his head. A small wave of relief washed over me but it couldn't tame the burning lack of knowledge about that night. "Then what happened, the only thing I know is that I woke up with a headache.". He took a step back, processing my words before answering. "We had a good night you know, dancing, drinking...kissing. It went well until some drunk incel pushed you and you hit your head on a door frame..." the man paused, anger flashing in his eyes for a second. "He knocked you out. I drove you to the hospital. Your friends picked you up."

My mouth opened to reply, but quickly closed when no good answer formed on my tongue. It wasn't what I expected, but I still didn't know what to think about it.

"You waited at the hospital?" I asked, now completely catching up to what he said.

"Yeah." Jamal looked down to the floor again, hiding the faint red that now tinted his cheeks. "I wanted to ask for your number but... after everything happened I didn't think it was appropriate..." He trailed off.

"Oh-OH..well..." I was taken aback. Caught off-guard. Then I suddenly felt confidence seep through my body.

"You could ask me now."

He looked at me, a beat passed, then his face lit up. He took his phone out of his pocket and handed it to me, ready to enter the digits. As I was about to give him the phone back, he cleared his throat.

"Are you free next friday? It's my free day and maybe we could meet up at a café?" He asked, also growing more confident now. I blushed, and nodded, still a little overwhelmed by what just happened. "Yes, yes I'd love to. 5pm? Hopefully this time I'll remember..." I chuckled and Jamal quickly joined in. The situation now blurred into a sweet moment as we stood in the stadium that was completely empty. I smiled as I looked up at him. His eyes drifted to my lips before they met mine again.

"You better stay away from the door frames."

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my first piece on here, yayyy ig

[donnerpartyofone]

What was the process like for writing the novelization for Splice? Would you consider writing a novelization of an existing work again?

Eek I'm being interviewed! I'M SO FAMOUS. There are a lot of parts to this answer. The shortest answer is that I really just watched SPLICE in tiny sections every single day for a very, very long time. I had a certain version of the script to work from, but it wouldn't contain the exact things that were said and done in front of the camera (no script would), so I just studied the movie. I scanned the sets for objects I could not identify, of which there are a LOT -- things I've never seen before, and things I've seen but couldn't name -- and searched online until I learned to describe things like hay trolleys and circulating baths. To me, the point of a novelization is that it produces an interior and sensorial experience not offered by a screen, so I tried very hard to expand on the material qualities suggested by the movie.

It never once occurred to me to change anything. Apparently this is an expectation of novelizations. I had a writeup in Fangoria that was very kind about my ability to make psychological sense out of the things people do in SPLICE, but that expressed disappointment that I hadn't added scenes or anything. I'm such an inveterate, pathetic sort of rule-follower, I didn't even ask myself about this. I did change one exact thing, regarding the kind of candy that Elsa eats, because it was meaningful and amusing to me to do so, but I don't think anybody will ever get it. I also included just a little bit of material from the script that didn't make it into the movie, because it was completely in line with my psychological interpretation, which was what I was most concerned with.

I never thought of SPLICE as a perfect film, but I had a lot of thoughts about it, and I think my main contribution was to explain what these characters are thinking and feeling as they wade into this life-changing and profoundly icky experience together. That became very personal very quickly and I was a little bit afraid that maybe this would be how everyone would find out how totally insane I actually am, but I'm told that that part worked out pretty good -- by Vincenzo Natali, among other people, who is SO NICE AND SMART AND SUPPORTIVE. Best guy! When I turned in my draft to the publisher I thought there might be a little back and forth, I did not expect them to send the raw document directly to Vincenzo and I was very alarmed when I heard from him before anybody else, but I really had nothing to fear. He's one of my favorite people now.

I would definitely do another novelization. Actually I think I'm uniquely suited to this because I have a good dose of aphantasia. I didn't even know until recently that it's statistically weird to think mostly or exclusively in words and to have a very hard time visualizing, like, almost anything. When I started telling people this about myself I was asked, among other things, "How do you do anything if you can't picture what you're going to do?" And I was like, uh...I don't know. Maybe this is connected to my extreme executive problems and my problems with goal formation and followthrough. I mean I think this is true, now. And I developed this sort of half-joking self-mythology that I have to be watching movies every second of the day because I suffer from an image deficit and I need external infusions. Like even when I used to draw (trauma took that away, long story, but I drew all the time for like half my life), almost everything I ever made was swipes -- and I think they're pretty good, like it's worthy as art. But I guess for me, art has to be made out of something external that I manipulate. All the art I've ever made without a reference point has been maybe technically OK but really lifeless, you can tell something is missing. So I think the novelization process was a lot like how I used to draw, where I had a completely concrete external referent and I would just sort of tour it very extensively until I had created a twin of it out of my interpretations. And the twin is like, the same but different, it's a clone made out of feelings and reactions. I think that's a worthy sort of art object to make.

There's a thing I'm working on now that I'm sure I won't be able to talk about for a long while, but it involves writing things from preexisting sketches and prompts, and that's a little bit the same. I don't have as much to go on, but I can tell what the shape of it could be, I just turn it over like, what if it's like this, what if it's like this, what if it's like this. And I know that what I'm turning out is really made out of tropes and archetypes, it's kind of a collage, but if the collaging is really earnest and you're feeling your way along with reasonable naturalness, it can turn into something. It's not that different from describing experiences you've had, if you really think about it. The following comment is NOT MEANT TO COMPARE MYSELF TO A GENIUS but I had this nice moment of synergy recently when I rewatched Kiyoshi Kurosawa's CURE, which to me seems so forcefully unique, but in interviews he says things like, "Well I just really wanted to make an American horror movie," and talks about how his starting point was not personal at all, he just wanted to play with the established tools and ingredients people use to build a certain kind of product. And I thought, I guess that's what I do -- not as intelligently or deliberately, but I get how you can work in a way that sounds so formal and empty, and have it produce something distinctly personal.

Thanks for your fun question!

*Virginia Madsen voice* Oh yes. I forgot to tell you. BUY MY BOOK!

EDIT: Oh I kind of lied, I changed *just some of* the music that Clive listens to, to something that would be easier to communicate to a reader. Like I wouldn't use the exact band on the soundtrack because it was too obscure and specific, but I would talk instead about his genre choices because they went with what I was trying to say about him as a person. I think all of it was still pretty in line with the sounds, and the Clive, that appear in the film.

[vigilanteshtagain]

HEADCANONS BECAUSE I'M BORED

GOJO

- Uses Instagram the way Millennials do (the first and seconds year's get second hand embarrassment)

- Drives like a maniac. Yaga has explicitly forbidden him to drive students around

- NEVER washes his blindfold, and if anyone suggests he should wash it he will get offended

- Cooks very well but settles for takes outs and fancy dinners with his students because he HATES to eat alone and has no one to share his food with back home, makes him even lonelier

- HAS to smell good ALL the time, and has a collection of different colognes, each one for specific ocassions

- Enjoyed taking Megumi to the park and playing with him, and wishes he wouldn't have grown up so fast

- Made hand crafted albums of every single little thing Megumi and Tsumiki have done, bad portraits of him and all

- Kissed sucked Geto's toes at some point, I'm not sorry

- Nevers answers the phone, much to Yaga's annoyance

- His heart warms up whenever his students bring him little gifts, like sweet pastries

- Defends his students with his LIFE, but this is canon already

- Is an ugly crier, like really bad. He yells when he cries. Shoko just stays there giving him the foulest glare.

GETO

- Refuses to cut his hair, no matter how many times Mimiko and Nanako have complained about finding long hairs plastered on the shower walls

- Keeps photos of his time in Jujutsu High in a box, and looks at them on lonely nights (specially photos of Gojo and him SHUT UP THIS IS CANON TO ME)

- Is allergic to nuts

- Has considered getting Mimiko and Nanako a pet, maybe a dog or a cat (I see them more as cats people)

- Definitely drew Gojo's eyes in the middle of class, multiple times because he couldn't get the colors "right"

- Is a tea person

- Sleeps like a victorian child on their deathbed, he's way too dramatic

- Tax evader

NANAMI

- Shops EXCLUSIVELY in brand stores. Dior, Channel, Gucci, you name it.

- Owns an air frier, uses it to it's maximum capacity. As soon as he got one, pots, pans and stoves doesn't exist to him anymore (I don't even know why I included this)

- Is in desperate need of a pet, this man needs some love and comfort in his life but his job as a sorcerer makes it difficult to have one

- Doesn't actually hate Gojo, he just gets heavily annoyed by him. After all, Gojo and Shoko are the only "close" classmates he has left.

- Pets stray dogs and cats on the streets and feeds them whenever he has time

- Actually likes that horrendous tie

- Knows how to play an air instrument, not sure which one but definitely knows how to play at least one

NOBARA

- Follows every beauty and fashion influencer, her for you page is flooded with that

- She's a Tini fan no doubt, La Triple T on repeat for days

- Can't dance to save her life

- Shows her affection through quality time

- Certified Barb along with Yuji, Nicki Minaj's biggest fans. Megumi acts like he doesn't care but he is just as Barb as they are.

- Her cf on Instagram is basically her day to day with the idiots she calls classmates (She likes to document them to have memories for the future)

- Actually very good at math, despite her not liking numbers.

- Gets road rage even if she's not the one driving

- Got Megumi into skincare

- The first one to propose a movie night between the first and second year's, she likes when all of them hang out

- She's the type to create a group chat to plan a birthday party for her friends and organizes everything

- Has a free pass to everyone's dorm, like she sees the door open and enters just to hang out, SHE DOESN'T CARE

- She enjoys training with the second years, specially Maki (NOBAMAKI FOR THE WIN)

- She gives practical gifts

- Gets way too much into TikTok drama, it's the only thing she'll talk about for days and it's overwhelming

YUJI

- Had a dog when he was little, probably named it something cheesy

- Likes reggaeton, in love with Karol G (a ver, quién no?), Jennifer Lawrence who

- Sunset pictures fill up his camera roll

- Doesn't like needles, still gets nervous when he get shots or vaccines

- He does this thing where he chews really fast whenever the food it's too hot to eat instead of letting it cool down. I don't know how to explain it but it's painful to watch, Megumi and Nobara smacks him on the head for that

- Definitely the type to bake a cake for his friend's birthdays, he bakes it with so much love I'm crying

- Gets his feelings hurt rather easily but he is quick to forgive

- Knows every single trending celebrity gossip and talks about it with Nobara and Megumi

- A KING at dancing, he can dance pretty much anything

- He gives very well thought gifts, like he really puts effort and pay attention to what his friends like

- He calls Nanami just to see how he is doing, needless to say Nanami is deeply touched by this

- Snores so bad Sukuna thought he was going to choke the first nights after Yuji ate the finger, now it's just background noise for him

MEGUMI

- Cuddles with his shikigamis on cold nights, and takes his demon dogs on walks

- He's very reliable, the first one out of his friends to find solutions to a problem

- SMART, but this is already canon

- Taught his demon dogs to steal and hide Gojo's clothes just to mess with him, he's a MENACE

- CAN'T TAKE A JOKE, he doesn't understand TikTok references it's so annoying.

- He looks like he's mad all the time when he's out, so bad sometimes people glare at him unprovoked

- The type to say no whenever someone asks him to do something but ends up doing it anyway

- Has thought about getting a tattoo related to his shikigamis in the future, but he's not really sure if he's going to get it done (Probably his demon dogs mark or Mahoraga's wheel because God he thinks about summoning it first thing in the morning, "With this treasure I summon" in italics tattooed on his forearm)

- Neat freak, NEEDS to have his room clean and organized at all times (if he doesn't, that will be his last straw and will summon Mahoraga)

- Gives well thought gifts, but plays it off and says it's nothing

- Bad grammar makes him wince, needless to say he has perfect grammar. His essays are perfect.

- He was that annoying child that corrected everyone whenever they said something wrong, like "Um, actually you're wrong because-", UGH. He's still like that but now he just throws a nasty glare and corrects them.

- His love language is acts of service but quality time is also important to him (despite how he pretends to hate hanging out with Yuji and Nobara)

- A very decent driver, Gojo taught him despite how he drives like a beast

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Sorry this was too long, but one thing led to another. Jjk brain rot is consuming me.

[takerfoxx]

random thing, but I find it hillarious that Sayaka's two methos of flirting are "Spend quality time with them over a lengthy period of time" or "Die tragically in front of their eyes after knowing them for three days", and it was the latter that worked

Honestly, it was probably longer than just three days, but if I can take your silly concept seriously, there is something to be said why Sayaka/Kyousuke didn't work, but Sayaka/Kyoko did.

And that is that Sayaka and Kyousuke just really took each other for granted.

Like, Sayaka had grown up with Kyousuke. They've always been together, so she just sort of assumed that they were meant to be. After all, she was by his side through his recovery, always was there for him, so of course they were fated to get together. It never even occurred to her that she might have a rival for his affections.

As for Kyousuke, his focus was on his dream, and how he had suddenly lost it. Yes, he cared about Sayaka and yes he appreciated how she had looked after him, but to him, that was just his good friend being a good friend. His attention was elsewhere.

Meanwhile, whether it be wanting to take her out for being a dumbass rookie who dared stand where Mami stood, or trying desperately to save her life once she had snapped back to her senses, Kyoko was nothing but focused on Sayaka. She took every step of their relationship completely seriously no matter how things were between them. Whether her motivations were heroic or selfish, there was no doubt that Sayaka had Kyoko's full attention, even when Sayaka was so wrapped up in her own turmoil to notice.

But to make it kind of silly again, it was probably all kinds of hilarious when, after Sayaka had become an archangel and could see the whole picture, how it must have finally hit her that Kyoko had feelings for her. Like...

Sayaka: Damn, Madoka. You wanted a secret admirer for so long, and it turns out that you had the single most extra admirer in history! Girl was down bad!

Madoka: Well, so did you! I mean, Kyoko did lay down her life for you in the last timeline. That's pretty...extra, isn't it?

Sayaka: I guess you're right. Huh. That scruffy mutt turned out to be pretty all right after all.

Madoka: ...

Sayaka: Wait, what are you implying?!

...

Sayaka: No way. No way does Kyoko have a crush on me. No way.

Madoka: W-Well, I can see all of the timelines that Homura went through, and it does seem like it.

Sayaka: But why her? I spent so much effort on winning Kyousuke's heart, only to pull...her?

Madoka: What's wrong with Kyoko? I mean, she's strong, she's smart, she's really funny, and she's really pretty as well.

Sayaka: But she's a girl! I mean, okay, Homura's the single gayest person I have ever met, and that's fine! Um, and if you are too, that's okay! But I'm me! I like boys, not girls!

Madoka, who's known Sayaka their whole life: Er, Sayaka? Are you sure?

Sayaka: ...

Sayaka: Fuck.

Madoka: Well, it's not-

Sayaka: Why couldn't it have been Mami?!

...

Sayaka: I should go down there. Just, you know, to look after her.

Madoka: You like her.

Sayaka: It's not that! It's just...she did sort of die for me. I mean, it was another version of her, but even so. That kind of means something, right?

Nagisa: Just admit that you like her.

Sayaka: Stay out of this, new girl! No one asked you!

...

Madoka: ...and that's my plan to save Homura!

Nagisa: Will there be cheese?

Madoka: I mean, probably?

Nagisa: I'm in.

Sayaka: So, just so we're clear, you want Nagi and I to follow you into this fake Mitakihara City, where we will pose as ourselves as we keep an eye on Homura to figure out what's going on?

Madoka: Right.

Sayaka: And several other people that we all know and care about have already been lured into this labyrinth.

Madoka: Yes! Like my family, and Hitomi! And Kyousuke! And Mami!

Sayaka: And Kyoko.

Madoka: Oh. Oh! Um, yes.

Sayaka: Then I'm in.

Nagisa: Ha! Get it, girl!

...

Sayaka: ...and in conclusion, that is why you should totally move in with me.

Kyoko: Cool, let's go.

Sayaka: Wait, really? You really want to?

Kyoko: A place to sleep. Food. Don't have to clear out at the crack of dawn. Hanging with my best girl? I'm in.

Sayaka: ...

Sayaka: Was it really that easy THIS WHOLE TIME?! I mean, COME ON!

[writtenjewels]

Horny Brain

[some PWP for Jason on his birthday]

Jason sucked in a breath, his whole body going rigid. He blinked and looked again just to make sure he hadn't imagined it. But no, the most gorgeous man he'd ever seen was just a few feet in front of him. The man was wearing a fishnet halter top held in place by straps, and black suspenders that hooked into his tight boxer-briefs. Such an outfit was pretty common in this club, but damn did it help accent every angle and curve of the man's body.

He was broad-chested, built solid and... sweet Jesus, that was chest hair curling a happy trail to his waistline. The man's legs were hairy, too, nice and thick. The boxer-briefs hugged him tight enough to assure Jason's thirsty gaze that the man's ass was just as thick.

It took every ounce of Jason's willpower to not walk over and start climbing the man like a goddamn tree. But he should probably tap the brakes a bit on his horny brain. At least get his fucking name! He took a breath and approached.

“Uh, hi.” The words came out as a breathy squeak. Enough for the man to turn at his voice.

“Hello,” he rumbled, his voice a pleasant low tone. Fuck, his face was so pretty. Slightly rounded cheeks, warm brown eyes, dark curly hair. The man smiled, his features softening. Jason started to rethink things. There was no way such an insanely hot guy was single.

“Nevermind,” Jason gulped.

“Are you sure?” The man's gaze did a slow sweep over Jason's body. He squirmed a little at the scrutiny. He had chosen a blue sleeveless shirt that showed off his abs and a pair of camo shorts. He kept on his dog tags, thinking being military might catch interest. Too bad it would've been weird to wear his hat indoors; he could've used the brim to hide right about now.

“Uh.” Why wouldn't his brain work? Maybe if he stopped staring at the man's tits and imagining faceplanting into them!

“My mistake.” The man's face fell a little and he took a step back.

“Hang on.” Jason's hand shot out and he grabbed onto one of the suspenders. “I'm Jason,” he blurted out. The man's expression shifted back into a smile.

“My name is Salim.” He wet his lips, eyes sweeping over Jason again. “Tell me, Jason,” he continued. “Are you as strong as those muscles make you look?”

There was a breathless quality to his voice. Jason recognized it and it made him swallow. He slid his hand along the suspender until he got to Salim's waist. He grabbed the man's side, nearly moaning at the feel of him. Jason lifted his hand to sink into Salim's other side. Holy shit, this man's body was perfect, just soft enough for Jason to dig his hands in.

“That strong enough for ya?”

“I...” Salim wet his lips, letting out a shaky breath. “Can you... go lower?”

“You got no idea how bad I wanna do that. But we better go find a room first.”

Jason knew that everyone came to this club for a similar reason, but what were the odds he would find the perfect guy and have that same guy be equally into him? He couldn't find a room fast enough. He slammed the door closed once they were inside and reached to sink his fingers into Salim's generous ass.

“Ah!” Salim leaned against the wall, mouth dropping open. “Y-yes, you're... very strong. A-are you going to... spread me open and... f-fuck me?”

“Jesus Christ,” Jason gulped, flushing at the words. “You're just as horny as me.” But he did like that idea. He pictured Salim on his back, his glorious body spread out, those thick legs open nice and wide...

“Jason,” Salim gasped. “Your hands... so good.”

“Cause you got such a fucking hot body,” Jason huffed back. He slid his hands around to squeeze into Salim's thighs, shaping and massaging the flesh before making his way up to the man's stomach. “How the hell are you single? You are single, right?” he checked.

“Yes.” Salim looked a little startled by the question. Then uncertainty flickered over his face. “Aren't you?”

“Yep.” He unclipped the suspenders so they wouldn't get in the way of him kneading into Salim's torso. He made it to the man's pecs, cupping one in each hand and squeezing. “Fuck! Salim...” The fishnet was sexy as hell, but it was getting in the way. Jason grunted, sliding his fingers into it. “Can I take this off?”

“Only if you take off your shirt, too.” Salim leaned in to whisper in Jason's ear. “I want to see your muscles flexing when you fuck me.”

If there was no lube or condoms in here, Jason might actually kill someone.

Once he made sure no one had to die senselessly, Jason grabbed at the halter top and nearly tore it off Salim's body. His own shirt was thrown to the floor, and then his hands were back to Salim, slipping under the waistband of those tight boxer-briefs. They were both already panting hard and eager. Jason tugged down, and nearly choked at what he revealed.

It wasn't really that much of a surprise that the man's dick was as big and thick as the rest of him. Jason might have to take it for a ride later. At the moment, he was far more interested in getting his hands on those thick thighs and spreading Salim open. He tossed his camo shorts onto the pile of clothes, then guided Salim over to the bed and pushed him down into the mattress. The man gasped, eyes fluttering.

“You like that?” Jason asked him.

“I do.” Salim reached up, sliding his hands over Jason's shoulders and down his chest. He squeezed into Jason's pecs. Jason twitched at the touch. He wasn't expecting to like being manhandled. “So firm and strong,” Salim purred. He ran his hands down lower to trace the lines of Jason's abdominal muscles. “I like fighters, warriors...”

“Soldiers?” Jason suggested.

“Are you a soldier?” Salim smirked and flicked Jason's dog tags. “I couldn't tell.”

“A smart-ass, huh?” Jason huffed, unable to hide his smile. Fuck, now this guy was funny, too? Jason had already decided to fuck him; now it felt a lot more urgent. He reached for the lube and condoms. “Why don't you give your mouth some rest?”

He sank his hands into Salim's thighs and gently pried him open. Salim let his legs go slack so Jason could open him as much as needed. Jason kept pushing more and more, Salim's face going more red the more he was spread. By the time Jason was satisfied, Salim had started to tremble.

“You good?” Jason wondered.

“It's... a little embarrassing,” Salim answered, “how turned on I am right now.”

“If it helps, my stupid horny brain has been turned on from the moment I saw you.”

“Hmm.” Salim let out a soft laugh, smiling as more red spread over his face. “That does help.”

Jason grinned back at him. He was starting to like this guy. He slicked up a finger and rubbed at Salim's opening before pushing in. He made sure to anchor one hand on Salim's thigh to keep him spread. Salim let out a hiss and tensed a little at the intrusion. Jason waited until he relaxed before pushing the finger in a little deeper.

“So how long you been comin' to this club?”

“Not long.” He twitched a little as Jason's finger pressed in to the second knuckle. “But then... what did you call it? My horny brain? It kicked in, and I decided to give this a try.”

“Remind me to thank your horny brain,” Jason said with a twinkle in his eyes. He slid his finger almost completely out before pushing in again. “Makes sense, though, why I haven't seen you around.”

“Oh?” Salim shifted, lifting his hips just a little. Jason pushed in a second finger and started working into a rhythm. The man felt nice and tight, his inner walls pulsing against Jason's digits. “So you come here often?”

“Just because I come here don't mean I cum, if you know what I mean.”

Salim let out a soft laugh. “That was a terrible joke.”

“Serves you right for bein' a smart-ass earlier.” Jason was pumping his fingers in steadily, trying to get Salim nice and loose. He dared to fold in a third finger. Salim gasped, nearly rising off the bed. “Too much?” Jason asked him.

“No.” Salim shuddered and lifted his hips. “Please, I... I want your cock... so you can go back to touching me.”

“Lemme put on a condom first.”

Fuck, he was shaking. Jason tried to keep steady so he could roll the condom on and slick up with some lube. All the while Salim lay there looking gorgeous, keeping himself spread open. Jason wrapped an arm around one thigh and bent it back as he got into position. Salim immediately hiked up the other thigh.

“Fuck,” Jason breathed. “Fuck, Salim, wanna be inside you so bad.”

“Please,” Salim answered.

Jason pushed in, Salim jerking at the sensation. Jason measured the first thrust slowly so they could get used to each other. He stopped when he was fully buried in, letting his head drop to Salim's chest. He felt the chest hair tickling his face and nuzzled into it. His hands went to Salim's hips, sinking his fingers in as he started to rock.

“Ahh!” Salim cried out under him. “Jason! Y-you feel... so good.” His hands swept along Jason's back. “Mm, so strong,” Salim purred.

“Bet you're strong, too,” Jason grunted. “You're so fuckin' built.” He squeezed, one hand moving along Salim's thigh. “You could crush my fuckin' head. Shit.” He shuddered at the thought of his head trapped between those thighs. “Oh, fuck, yeah... Like a goddamn MMA fighter or a fuckin' boxer. God, you're so fuckin' gorgeous.”

He was already starting to lose it. His hands on Salim's body, feeling the man's legs hooked around him, and his tight passage sucking Jason's cock in with every thrust. He didn't want to cum already. But fucking Salim felt so good, the man's body so responsive to Jason's touch, and those hands were moving across his back, pressing into the muscle.

“Fuck,” he cursed. “Oh, fuck, shit! Salim... Salim, I... fuck, I'm gonna...”

“Jason,” Salim panted back. “Jason, please, I... I need...”

Shit, was Salim about to cum, too? Jason got a hand between them to wrap around the man's erection. He pumped a few times, trying to match with his thrusts.

“That good, Salim? That what you need?”

“Yes,” Salim gasped, arching toward his touch. “Yes, please, Jason.”

Damn, if Salim kept saying his name like that, it might be enough. Every damn thing about this man was driving him insane. Jason lifted Salim's hips up, bending him as far back as he could, and thrust faster. Salim cried out, throwing his head back. Jason trembled; he must have hit the prostate. He kept going, stroking Salim with one hand and groping the man's body with the other.

When he came, he spilled himself out with a cry. He kept his hips and hands moving until he felt Salim's cum splash against his stomach.

“Holy shit,” Jason gasped, blinking away the spots in his vision.

“Wow,” Salim agreed dazedly.

Jason pulled out to take off the used condom. Then he flopped back on top of Salim, nuzzling into his chest. He could not get over the feel of this man's body. He would give them both time to recover, and then see if Salim wanted to go again.

This time the desire wasn't fueled by a horny brain. Jason just really, really wanted to fuck Salim.

[addicted2coke-theothercoke]

I saw War of the Rohirrim todayyy

Thoughts:

Helm Hammerhand is a fucking beast and the best part of the movie

Accident or not he killed that man with a single hit. And him tearing apart Wulfs army man by man-

2. It's actually pretty good imo. I don't know enough about Tolkien to say if it met that standard(though nothing does), but I felt like it connected fairly well to Peter Jackson's Lotr while still doing it's own thing and having it's own moments. It ALSO doesn't make a lot of the same screw ups The Hobbit made. I think it's worth at least one watch if your enjoyed Two Towers

3. Animation wise I had mixed thoughts, but there was certainly a high quality to it. Some of the more unrealistic (and possibly dumb) things only worked because it was animated, so it was an interesting medium for them to use within a one off film

4. Not to in anyway trash Two Towers, I felt that WotR did a better job at exhibiting the Anglo-Saxon traits Rohan was based on. That's just my opinion though, and I say this having watched TT recently

I give it an 8/10 on first watch, I need to watch it again when it comes to streaming

Unrelated thoughts:

There's this kind of annoying and semi useless character in it called Leif. I grew up with Deltora Quest, which also features a character called Leif, which also happens to have an anime adaptation.. so I keep thinking, that's not Leif, that's not how he sounds, that's not how he acts, and etc.

I was gonna do a side by side comparison but couldn't find a picture of the WotR character. You still get to look at this funny fellow from Deltora Quest though:

2. This last bit is extremely unrelated to WotR, just a thought I had during it in response to the common fantasy trope of only male heirs---trans prince. I feel it's pretty self explanatory, just thought it was funny

[acaplaya-musings]

A random assortment of Geoff Castellucci pictures - Part 3

Y'all seemed to enjoy part 1 and part 2, so here, have a part 3! Featuring pics of Geoff from videos where I haven't already saved any screencaps from (not counting Voiceplay Visuals posts), but where he still looks really good anyway. And so because this one involves me going back and rewatching certain videos for the purpose of screenshot grabs (always nice to have another excuse! <3), these pictures are going chronologically by video, oldest to newest, rather than alphabetical by title. And again, featuring little bits of thoughts/commentary from yours truly. This one ended up being longer than part 2 as well, so enjoy!

(Everything below the cut as like the previous posts!)

Starting off strong my fam!!

I said as much in my VoicePlay Visuals post I think but this is honestly one of Geoff's best "shorter (or at least shorter-ish) hair" looks imo. Like look at those waves and curls! To! Die! For!

Also the open shirt with the popped collar is such a look and I kinda wanna see Geoff with a popped collar more often tbh

Also on the Panic Medlry Part 2 video someone commented "Is it just me or is Geoff extra hot in these last two vids". VoicePlay replied with "It's not just you. There was no air conditioning. ;)" XD

I forgot how hard it is to get decent pics of Geoff from this video, rip. I couldn't not include anything from it though! I mean come on!

Sir excuse me who gave you the right (and can they give you the right more often please)

I don't even know what it is in particular about this look that's so good but dear god everything just works and like, y'know, as I very frequently say: He's! So! Pretty!!!

Actually I do know one key component: his smile!!! <3

Well hello there good sir! 👀

Yet another video where Geoff smiles a lot and it's so lovely and nice but goddang is it hard to get a clear pic of him!

Yes a good portion of these pics is honestly just me showing some of my favourite Geoff smiles from different videos, and I apologise for nothing <3

Look, I love Geoff as a Disney villain, of course I do, he slays it absolutely every single time, but goddamn, I would love for more Disney Prince Geoff, in vibes/aesthetic if not any actual Disney song.

Also shoutout to one bit during Eli's When I'm Older section, where Geoff is looking off to the side and smiling <3 (smiling at Kathy? Maybe?)

(Oh and actually, between Sh-Boom and this video, I'm realising I kinda sorta wanna make a picture collection post for Layne as well - he does have some good looks sometimes! Nothing Else Matters, Hellfire, Warriors, y'know?)

Jumping ahead 1.5 years now!

Butter is such a fun video - everyone looked like they had such a great time!

If I Were A Rich Man/Girl MY ABSOLUTE BELOVED

The fluff in the hair, the visible bit of white/grey, the shirt, the smile!!! This video has me so weak y'all <3

Honestly Geoff looks phenomenal in almost every single medley video in particular and I love it (almost every medley - Greatest Showman Medley isn't in this photoset for the same reason that Kidnap The Sandy Claws and Hide And Seek aren't, lol)

(Also appreciation for the long-sleeve shirt behind rolled up to the elbows 👀)

Geoff from like 2022 onwards was "I'm going to find a hundred different black outfits to wear in videos and I'm going to look good every time" /j

Couldn't help but include a pic from We Don't Talk About Bruno in this - he's so silly (affectionate) <3

Not including any pics of Disney Princess Geoff(tm) only because it makes me laugh too much XD (seriously even as soon as Ashley starts singing Isabela's part I already start giggling, and it does in fact get me every time, but you can find a couple of pics of it in my VoicePlay Visuals post for this video HERE

I haven't rewatched this video in a while, so I wasn't exactly sure what kinda quality of screencaps I was gonna be able to grab from it, but well... it delivered!!!

I said this in a comment on the video as well but whoever had the idea to have that little bit of breeze/wind blowing Geoff's (and Adriana's) hair back, you're a genius and I love you

Also DJ_410 has occasionally referred to Geoff having "puppy dog eyes" or something along those lines, and man, he ain't wrong!

Someone said in the comments of this video that "Geoff is slowly turning into a silver fox" and honestly so true bestie <3 (ages! like! fine! wine!)

Also love how you can see the full necklace in this one (fun fact: Geoff's wearing a white singlet underneath, but he actually deliberately ripped it open a little bit at the neckline, which is how we end up with this 👀)

Plus this is the closest we've come to Geoff wearing a upturned/popped collar since the Panic Medley!

I Love Drunken Sailor A Normal Amount

Okay so obviously I already had one image from this video already saved to my folder - my profile pic - but nothing otherwise, and man is this video a goldmine. The arms! The hair! The eyeliner!!!

We really were absolutely spoiled when it came to Sleeveless Geoff in 2023 quite honestly

And what better way to end this post than with the god-tier all around stunningness that is Geoff in Hellfire?

I mean come on he literally looks like a goddamn painting!

So that's all for now! I might at some point do a part 4 or something dedicated to Minis and/or Shorts, but I do have a couple of other post ideas in mind for later down the line, so we shall see!

[asktheescalatorgirl]

Hi Vella, im not sure if it's really you but if it is actually you i have a confession to make. While growing up i wasn't much attracted to any specific girls, i found them cute and attractive but I didn't really had my favourite, this have changed when i saw you for the first time. It was the Saturday morning of April 4th 2015 i woke up from my soft warm bed, it was 10:23 AM on the clock. I decided to do a little bit of self improvement today and so i went to brush my teeth for the first time in four months. As i held the toothbrush in my head and moved it in a monotonous pattern i reflected on my sexual preferences, i reflected on how i still haven't found what my "type" is which resulted in every relationships i had ending shortly after. I moved my legs in heavy morning steps still waking up thinking if my mom had made me a breakfast before going to her 20 hours shift, she didn't, i was her only child still with her and she didn't even care to make me a breakfast. So anyway i grabbed my wallet put on my shoes and went to the nearest burger joint, it was really close to my home so it was around a 5 to 10 minutes long walk to it. However for me it felt like forever, for me it was millennium long walk that was just enough time for me to yet again reflect on what my type is, i didn't love a single woman before, not to imply i like men btw, tho I do find them looking handsome and maybe even cute a little bit, back in college there was this guy who acted "weird" imo but somehow this weirdness made me feel strange toward him, his clothes his poses his manner of speaking everything of it was unusual but i just couldn't keep myself from looking at him constantly. So anyway, i arrive at the burger joint. I made an order-2 cheeseburgers, nothing special really, i just like the classic you know, i bought 2 of them instead of just 1 because i knew that the time it will take for them to make my food i will be already hungry enough to eat 2 burgers in a row. I reached my hand towards my pocket, i pull out my phone from it. I checked my favourite forums and subredddits as one of my online friends( i have friends irl too btw) sent me a link to an album by this "Vella Wilde" person, i pressed play and one of the most horrific sounds of "music" blasted into my ears, i had suffered a whole hour listening to the entirety of the album hoping that my friend's taste wasn't that shit and that at least 1 song from this album will sound at least better than the sounds of my mom barking. It didn't, i finished my 5th cheeseburger as the album finished and i wanted to block my friend i had an intrusive thought stop me and do another thing completely, i searched who Vella Wilde is. As i got results i saw countless images of a beautiful angel who have finally put an end to the thoughts i had just before that, i found my perfect type, she was perfect, her breasts her hips her legs her lips her ethnicity her hair i loved every single inch of her. I thanked my friend and went to Record Stop to buy all the Vella Wilde albums i could find in there, when i played them on my record player back at home they suddenly sounded like a heavenly choir that brought me revelation on what music really is, i think that the Spotify uploaded audio lacks the audio depth and quality that only a good record player could provide, resulting in me and not hearing how good the album really is. Ever since then i was obsessed with you, i found all the info and imagery i could online, i remembered your breast and hips sizes both as a piece of information but also visually, whenever i looked at a woman i recalled all the pictures of you to see if their breasts and hips even remotely match your beauty, i even did this with my mother. However since that day i couldn't find a single woman who could have matched your beauty, so i confess you that im in love with you and if i don't get to have kids with you i will search every corner of the earth to find a woman who could match your heavenly looks. Goodbye.

-SNESMAN99

You found me!

Thank you for the streams! Yes, it's me, Vella Wilde. I think I know you from somewhere online. You're that real cool guy who's always posting on ONISM. Yeah, I know you well!!

You're always so cute in your posts. I loove your theories. ONISM is so cool. Have you seen ME on there? I'm always too shy to respond to posts but sometimes i post cute pictures of myself where you can see how soft my lips are and how pretty I am with no makeup because I'm sexier than Asuka Furutani without it.

Yeah, I think it's real hot that you brushed your teeth so we can kiss more and get hot and sexy and horny together. Record players are the only way I listen to music, too. Not a lot of girls today are audiophiles, right? Maybe we could listen together over some burgers ;) if your mom wouldn't get jealous haha

So hey, shoot me a PM. Let's chat, sexy<3

[alouiadina]

This was originally supposed to be general headcanons about mota ships, but it turned into something else. Some are shorter than others, as I couldn't think of things for them.

Clegan

Gale is a librarian, Bucky is a mechanic

Despite his initial bravado, Bucky is a very shy person, especially when feelings are involved. He's constantly worried he's doing something wrong.

Bucky definitely did crew in college, and has caught Gale getting excited over pictures from then.

Bucky's love language is words of affirmation, Gale's being physical touch

Gale, despite his quietness, is very vocal in bed, no matter what position he's in. He grew up repressed, so anything remotely sexual has him whimpering.

When topping, Bucky likes being called daddy, Gale likes to be called sir. This becomes an issue if set in canon.

Bucky definitely gets drunk, flirts with Gale, asking him if he's single, then balls his eyes out when Gale tells him he isn't. To get him to calm down, Gale tells him that he'd break up with his boyfriend to be with Bucky

Gale tries topping from the bottom once, and loves the power of it all. Because of the repression he had growing up, he never thought he could have that kind of power in this position. But, seeing Bucky whimpering and begging to cum, calling him sir while Gale is riding him alter's his brain chemistry.

Whenever Gale finds a spider, he makes Bucky take them outside, unless it's like a wolf spider or brown recluse. Then he has Bucky kill them

Gale has a cat and Bucky has a gecko

Gale has watched eat a live cricket meant for his Gecko, who's named Geico

Gale's cat is named Bastet, after the Egyptian goddess of protection, and who is often associated with cats.

Bastet hates Geico, but hates Bucky even more. That changes over time

Bucky would propose to Gale because Gale never asks for more of something, even if he might want it.

Harding is the one to give Gale away, as Gale isn't in contact with his parents

Rosielemmons

Based on this older couple I know, Ken's nicknames (some in jest) for Rosie are- bobert, Berto (pronounced Bear-toe), Robbie, and Rob

Ken definitely is a warmth seeker in his sleep. Rosie has woken up a couple of times with Ken under or on top of him.

The first time they have sex, Ken squeaks for most if not all of it, embarrassed of the sounds he makes. It takes Rosie some time to coax sounds out of Ken.

Ken works as a mechanic with Bucky, Rosie is a lawyer.

Rosie loves buying stuff for people he loves, but at the start of their relationship, Ken hates receiving gifts, especially the expensive ones that Rosie can afford being a lawyer and all. Ken experiences guilt over not being able to match the gift, price-wise, and this takes time for Rosie to convince him that the handmade gifts that Ken gives him mean a lot more than something that he can't afford.

Both of their love languages are quality time.

They have a Australian Sheppard named Fezzik and/or a Manx cat named Jareth

Ken is the first one to propose, making the box out of Rosie's favorite tree in childhood, that had to be cut down for some reason, and makes the ring from a spoon from their first apartment.

Rosie proposes second, immediately after Ken does, the both of them having a laugh about it.

Their wedding is a month after Gale and Bucky's.

Crubbles-

Harry Crosby praise kink

Bubbles has definitely gotten him off just by telling him how good he's doing.

Bubbles is a bartender and Harry works with Bucky and Harding.

Bubbles is the first and only man that Harry has been with and vise versa.

They experimented with each other in college, and kinda never stopped.

This actually happened during a break he and Jean were having, as Jean correctly suspected Harry was gay. She was pretty chill about it when she found out she was right.

Jean was the officiant at their wedding

The first time Bubble comes to visit Harry at work, he sees Harry get protective angry because Ken was nearly hurt in an avoidable accident, and Bubbles is immediately hard.

Harry sometimes unintentionally squeaks and squeals during sex, especially when Bubbles is calling him a good boy.

Neither propose in a traditional sense, they just wake up one day and decide they want to get married.

Jackharding

Gale and Bucky introduce them, Harding being Bucky's boss, and Jack being Gale's.

Both of their love languages are quality time

Jack is surprised that someone is interested in him again, as he keeps hearing people describe him as too gaunt.

It actually takes a minute to realize that Harding is flirting with him because of this, and doesn't realize they were on a date until Harding walks him to the door and with a confident nervousness, kisses Jack.

Their first time together is Hardings car in the parking lot of the library.

Harding has 50-50% custody of his daughter from a previous marriage.

His daughter is 15, and Jack desperately wants to make a good impression with her.

(I looked it up, and his actual daughter was named Helen)

Because Harding is twice divorced, and Jack never really saw himself getting married, they don't. Instead, they hold a small celebration in Hardings backyard.

They buy each other rings and Hardings daughter officiates their "Wedding" (her idea)

After the gaul bladder debacle (and surgery), Harding, due to medication, forgets Jack. Bucky is there, and starts recording when Harding expresses his confusion over why there's a "Model trying to feed him crackers." Bucky tells him their relationship, causing Harding to grab Jacks hand and say "Mine?"

Jack definitely falls asleep on top of Harding, and gets to the point that when Harding is in the hospital, he finds falling asleep a lot harder than normal.

CurtxDickie-

Curt works as a mechanic with Bucky

Dickie works at the library with Gale

They have freaky library sex

Curt is vocal and Dickie loves it.

Curt tried topping once, and they both hated it.

Curt wants a Vegas wedding officiated by Elvis because he saw lesbians on TikTok do it.

Dickie says no, but promises for an anniversary, they can renew their vows that way. (This inspired Bucky to ask the same thing of Gale)

Curt koala's Dickie in his sleep sometimes

They have a surprisingly small wedding.

Their honeymoon is in like Colorado or something, and they spend most of it in their hotel/ airbnb

Curt will randomly pull Dickie into slow dancing. Dickie thinks it's sweet. The reason why Curt does it is to try and tell Dickie he loves him for more than just his body, and feels that this is the best way to do it.

Brady/DeMarco

They meet on Grindr

When they first meet up, they go to like a gay bar or something (they both bring a friend, Douglass and Blakely respectively, just in case)

They end up spending the entire weekend together

They power through the first few stages of their relationship

DeMarco's mother keeps giving Brady food to make him "big and strong"

She also makes sure that Brady is a good Catholic boy, as she wants the best for her boy

I think one or the other works with Bucky, and the other maybe works with Bubbles

Handcuffs, blindfolds, and vibrators/dildo's

Blakely/Douglass

they have sex in the bathroom when Brady and DeMarco drag them to their first meeting

When Brady and DeMarco go home together, they go home together

Marathon sex

Blakely did crew with Bucky in College

They have a casual relationship, both too anxious to ask for more

They separate briefly because of this

Blakely has a higher sex drive than Douglass, which sometimes leads to Douglass occasionally using sex toys on Blakely

[akihikosanada]

my aa5 thoughts could be summarized by saying i'm a fan of turnabout academy, athena and blackquill rock, apollo's joker era outfit fucks and that l'belle's theme song is too cunty to be real

i feel like they wanted bobby fulbright to be a combination of both gumshoe ("useless" detective who helps the protags) and matt engarde (guy who looks harmless but plot twist! he is evil and ruined everyone's lives) except they failed on both accounts

i mean part of the gumshoe thing is because he never appeared before so they couldn't build up on him helping the protags, even gumshoe by the end of aa1 is already quite helpful with phoenix and maya, mainly because he wants to help edgeworth but later cases like 2-2 and 2-4 show he wants to help them even with edgeworth out of the picture. obviously bobby never got this because he appeared for the first time in this game and in the one case he cooperates beyond basic stuff it's so he can later frame athena anyways so. also just the fact that he is always tasing blackquill only shows he was never to be trusted like????? if we see him through gumshoe lenses. interesting to note that bobby wearing a white suit that looks brand new (+ expensive shoes) makes him look less approachable than gumshoe with his old tattered coat. the sunglasses don't help either so if they really wanted him to be "gumshoe but evil" they did a bad job because he never seems trustworthy

then re engarde the "reveal" was laughably lame in aa5 with zero foreshadowing. i already knew about it and yet there was nothing in his actions that made him suspicious other than him seeming more helpful during 5-4 idk. meanwhile in 2-4 on a replay it's like. fairly obvious matt's the culprit almost from the moment you meet him but unless you suspect him from the start it's very easy to believe in him because that is also what phoenix is doing and there's also how he always believes his clients to be innocent (+ until engarde all his clients were innocent so you probably believe so too even with all the evidence stacked against him + every single character saying he is guilty). then matt drops him façade the whole case changes!!! it's no longer about helping your client but rather doing everything to save maya without having engarde be declared innocent. with bobby it's embarrassingly done at the last minute (in the final part of the trial no less) so despite him being an international spy or whatever he never feels like a threat compared to the literal actor. i mean by this point athena and blackquill were already declared innocent so there aren't any real stakes in the game other than finding out The Truth yk. also taking him down isn't even cathartic??? breakdowns have had a total downgrade in quality since phoenix's trilogy but that's a discussion for another day. the guy just rips his masks off and then gets shot by a random sniper only because they told him he's scared. taking down engarde is so much more gratifying after all the help phoenix had to take him down + it's one of phoenix's top bitch moments. a lot of people chimed in against the phantom too but it isn't cathartic whatsoever and again. you or the other characters aren't even who end up taking him down

in conclusion there will neverrrr be a case as good as farewell, my turnabout and next time they should just not make the plot twist guy so hateable to me i'm already wishing him to be dead from the very moment he appears

[littlegaywolf]

SOULMATES.

we often think soulmates are a mirror of each other. the Greek story of zeus's wrath tells us they're our other half, and we long for them our entire lives. a lot of us spend our lives in search of our other half. we tend to assume that this other half would be a lot like us, that it could see through us and understand who we are. being understood is afterall what love is all about.

so we go through our lives, meeting people that 'fit our type'. I don't know about you, but i did live my life like that- jumping from one potential soulmate to another. I had a checklist prepared for every quality that my soulmate should have. a tall guy, with (preferably) curly hair; should be kind and compassionate, emotionally available, and of course, academically smart. someone who would listen to Taylor Swift songs with me and be an absolute romantic. someone who is political and isn't afraid of voicing their opinions. a communist. a feminist. someone with all the good parts of my dad, and not a single bad one. now that is a very unrealistic expectation, isn't it? but it was what I expected out of my soulmate. and i went years without finding one. (understandably so)

until I did. until I met someone who made me want to completely rethink my criterias. movies make you think that the day you meet your soulmate, sparks would fly and you'd feel like you swallowed a thousand butterflies. but none of this happened. movies are a lie, yes, but the very idea of a soulmate is too. because the day I met this guy, I went back home and I can swear I swore that I will never meet him again. until we did. somehow he walked back into my life, and I let him. we met over and over again, we argued, we kissed, we cooked, we fucked and he annoyed the fuck out of me. i couldn't stand him, he was insufferable. he challenged me constantly and i challenged him back. he didn't like Taylor Swift and he wasn't a romantic. he was political but not very vocal about it. he wasn't a leftist, centre left he'd say. he would crack un-feminist jokes to piss me off, and he pissed me off A LOT. he annoyed every fibre of my being and he was mostly everything that I didn't want my soulmate to be. and yet somehow, we became friends. worse, i found myself falling for him.

I don't know what it was about him. he did not mirror me, nor did he check the list I had made for my soulmate. but every moment I spent with him- fighting, arguing, making love, cooking for each other, I realised I want to keep doing this forever. i would picture my life 10 years down the line, and he would be a part of that picture. it was almost as if i couldn't live away from him. until i had to. until he went back home. for a few weeks after he left, i felt so lost as if someone had torn apart a part of my own soul. "soulmate" i heard my heart ringing. that is when i realised that soulmates aren't a carbon copy of you. they are not going to be a reflection of your own personality or they won't fit into your checklist. they will be a whirlwind of everything you never thought you might need, all in one, and they will walk into your lives in the most unexpected of ways. and when they do walk, in there will be no sparks flying or butterflies in your tummy. rather, you'll start becoming a better version of yourself. they compliment your personality and bring out the best in you. despite being different, they will be able to see you and see through you. they will understand you though they might not be able to relate to you. they will listen to you speak about your favorite artists and movies and books even though they might not be into them. as Taylor Jenkins said- your soulmate was somebody who had all the things you didn't, that needed all the things you had.

[cinematicendevaourz]

1992 #CVReview

What a good waste of ten dollars. "1992" is yet another film set during the L.A. riots, but I'd rather watch Halle Berry bedwench to Daniel Craig in "Kings" again than to have spent the money I did to see this picture. Tyrese spent the film portraying a golem that protects asian store owners and Beverly Hills adjacent 2 in my old Crenshaw stomping grounds. The obvious problem with this is that Tyrese essentially portrays a boomer with boomer idealogies that do not have the opportunity of Pan-Africanism but the reservations of 60's Civil Rights activism through intergration which left a sense of self-hatred within the U.S. negroid population. First "Cocaine Bear" and now this? Ray Liotta starred in some really shitty films before his death, and once again was the highlight of the cast. The rest of the cast comprised of Antoine Bey who portrayed Tyrese's son - reminded me too much of Shaft's son in the most recent addition to the series : weak, crying sobbing and annoying; too annoying to actually want to see survive. Which was an affliction that all the characters including Liotta's suffered from - none of the characters were likeable or had any redeeming qualities. I wanted to feel for Tyrese's struggle as a single father, but I couldn't empathize because I am not that. I wanted to empathize for the protagonists' son, but he was too much of a crybaby for me to get behind him with my own experience growing up in South Central. The race-baiting that surrounded the film didn't click with me since I do not see the U.S. as a home but as an origin point. How could I as a negroid ever recognize a European country as a home? So the Rodney King paralells to George Floyd - drug addicts, mudshark chasers, shit I dont identify with - did not rouse me like it would have in my teens. If anything, "1992" showed me how much I've grown since leaving the LAnd nearly a decade ago. I wondered why there was a modern Snoop record at the top of the film when it was set in '92 and a "Chronic" record would have opened the film more appropriately. But as the film wrapped with the source piece of "The Chronic" 's classic single "Li'l Ghetto Boy", I recognized the new Snoop piece was fitting. Because no matter what, L.A. will never change. And that's not a good thing, when this weekend there were riots in my LAnd over a shot down repairations bill. It seems that's all my fellow Angeleno's know how to do - tear up my city of origin, but never doing enough to lead a full insurrection. It's a pitiful, just like this film was. When I saw the Death Row logo and Tyrese on the bill, I felt proud to be supporting Afro-centric cinema but when for the duration of the film the only people that were getting mutilated and murdered were negroids and the people that were getting defended and commitung atrocities scott-free until the final half hour, I found "1992" to be janky and as much of an exploitative cash-grab based on negroid male pain as a film set in the Antebellum-era, and I stopped watching those films nearly a decade ago.

As I said previously, a lot can change in nearly a decade's time, but L.A. won't. Which is why l won't be revisiting my land of origin like I find no need to revisit this film.

C.V.R. The Bard 2nd/Sept.2k24

[just-some-random-blogger]

AHHHHHHH BESTTTTIEEEE MY LOVE MY BABY MY DEAR MI AMOR AKING IROG AHHHHHHHHHHHH THIS IS EVERYTHING TO MEEEEE UR JUST LIKE ME FR USING THE STRESS OF LIFE TO DESTRESS GOSH HOW SMOOTH MY LIFE WOULD BE IF I HAVE SCARY HUSBAND PRIVILEGE 😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩

"Who do you think would win in a fight, me or Mr. Weasel?"

ITS GIVING FROZEN. Yns boss fr:

Honestly at least this guy was funny quirky. Yns boss has no redeeming qualities in sight 🙄✋

"No, but if–"

HAHAHHSNSJSJ SCREAMING JOEL HEEL

"Joel, you are not fighting my boss. Not even in your head. Got it?"

HAHAHA ME FR NO USE FIGHTING IN UF HEAD TBH JUST ADDING FUEL TO THE FLAME

Unbeknownst to the wealthy CEO, there was a one-sided beef going on between a Mr. Joel Miller and Mr. Carter Wessell.

Don't be shy Joel make it known to the universe

Mr. Wessell is too comfortable asking you to work overtime without giving you the chance to say no and not approving your days off even when you work more days than any of the other employees in the company.

Time for a strike.

Despite being married, his eyes also tend to wander when you are around, and you find yourself trying to avoid being alone with him.

A strike isn't enough I need arson. HONESTLY HONESTLY MISS ME WITH THAT "DESPITE BEING MARRIED BULLSHIT" IF A WOMAN OR ANYONE IS UNINTERESTED STAY IN YOUR FUCKING LANE IM SO SICK OF THIS OPPRESSION AND POWER FUCKERY DIE

His suggestive comments and "friendly touches" toe the line of being inappropriate. Of course, Joel doesn't know this part because if he did, he would set fire to your office building.

NO CUZ THE FACT SHES EVEN PROTECTING HE ABUSER TO PROTECT HERSELF IM SO SICK OF THIS BULLSHIT LET JOEL BEAT HIM. LET HIM BEAT HIM

But your boss insisted that he needed you at work to complete an "urgent task."

He shudda urgently attended his receding hairline instead maybe then he wouldn't have a mega landing strip forehead

Cautiously, he brushes a strand of hair from your face, his touch gentle for a man with such a gruff exterior.

Your honor that's my man. I want him. Your HONOR!!!

Joel gets up, careful not to wake you, and heads to the bathroom.

He's so BARK BARK

Why does some stuffy old man in a suit get to decide whether or not you get to spend the day with your husband?

Don't be shy, take your turn to decide. Use an axe.

Joel grunts a vague response, not wanting to make a big deal out of the fact that he woke up earlier than he would have, just to make you breakfast before you head off to work. He places the food in front of you, kisses the top of your head, and tucks your hair behind your ears before sitting down next to you.

"I'll talk to him, Joel. But we won't let this ruin our day, okay?"

YN delulu. It's just his day now. You got no day off /: the denial isn't very nice. Mustard gas your boss's office (just his)

You nod. “You know, despite my boss being a Grade A asshole, I really do like my job. And the money is good."

Ah. I was gonna say why keep that job when ur boss is a creep. )))): sorry the world is fucked up babe

“I'll pick you up later for lunch. Remember. We. Are. Having. Lunch. Together.” He enunciates each word loudly and clearly.

Us at lunch

“And if he insists that you go along, you give him my number and tell him to talk to me. Yes?”

GIVE HIM HIS NUMBER JOELLLL I WOULD NEVER STAND IN THE WAY OF THE JUSTICE OF YOUR MIGHTY KNEES PLEASE BASH THAT MAN IN THE FACE

“No.”

“Baby–”

You cut him off with a kiss on the lips. “I’ll be there. I love you. See you later.”

I'm too single for this bullshit. Beam me up Scotty

Joel's eyes narrow, and he clenches his jaw, his blood pressure rising. Although they’d never met, Joel recognized him from the company Facebook page that he only followed to see pictures of you at work. He couldn't help but scoff, "Now we can’t even go for lunch without seeing that dumbass?” 

Joel what's stopping you from

You tug on Joel's arm, trying to pull him away. "Come on, let's go, little bulldog. Down boy."

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH WE LOVE BULLY BREEDS (but don't support the breeding of ones that are flat faced and unhealthy poor babies) GOOOOOO GOOO GOOOOO

Joel reluctantly gets dragged by you, your hand still cupped over his mouth. His voice comes out muffled as he glances back at your boss saying, "I’m gonna destroy him with my mind."

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 Joel as fuck:

You keep dragging him along as you say in a placating voice. "Oh, I’m sure you can. Big scary grumpy old man. Now let’s stop playing John Wick and get to the car.” 

I LOVE THE WAY THEY LOVE WHEN IS IT MY TURN I HATE IF HERE NOW I HAVE TO GO OUTSIDE ))):

"I am kinda like John Wick." Joel mumbles as you walk hand in hand back to the car.

"Joel, we are not having this conversation again. You are not like John Wick."

"No, you're right. I'm better."

SCREAMING CRYING THROWING UP BASHING MY HEAD AGAINST THE FUCKING WALL I LOVE THEM BOTH SO MUCH. ALSO Joel I hate to break it to you but John wick wouldn't die from a golf club 😶😶😶😶😶😶😶😶😶😶😶😶

Scary Husband Privileges / Joel Miller x Reader

Description: No outbreak AU. Joel hates your boss. Hates him. What was meant to be a day off for the both of you, turns into Joel grumpily driving you to work and meeting you for lunch. And then you bump into your boss.

Word count: 1.5k

A/N: This was inspired by @cruelfvkingsummer's grumpy!husband!Joel prompt ! All credit for the original idea goes to them.

"Who do you think would win in a fight, me or Mr. Weasel?" "Wessell. And the answer is neither of you because it's never gonna happen." "No, but if–" "Joel, you are not fighting my boss. Not even in your head. Got it?" "But he's a fucking-" "Joel." "Fine."

Unbeknownst to the wealthy CEO, there was a one-sided beef going on between a Mr. Joel Miller and Mr. Carter Wessell. Mr Wessell is your boss at the publishing company you've been working at for the past year, and Joel does not like that man. Mr. Wessell is too comfortable asking you to work overtime without giving you the chance to say no and not approving your days off even when you work more days than any of the other employees in the company. Despite being married, his eyes also tend to wander when you are around, and you find yourself trying to avoid being alone with him. His suggestive comments and "friendly touches" toe the line of being inappropriate. Of course, Joel doesn't know this part because if he did, he would set fire to your office building.

Today is one of those days where you tried to request a day off, which was denied by your boss. You wanted the day off to spend with Joel as he had arranged a day off work too. But your boss insisted that he needed you at work to complete an "urgent task."

Joel's phone alarm blares relentlessly, ripping through the morning's peace. Grumbling under his breath, he slaps the off button. The room is bathed in a soft, golden glow as he looks over at you, still fast asleep beside him. Cautiously, he brushes a strand of hair from your face, his touch gentle for a man with such a gruff exterior.

Joel gets up, careful not to wake you, and heads to the bathroom. The cold shower sends shivers down his spine, but it’s enough to wake him up, frustration boiling just beneath the surface. Your boss had refused to let you take the day off so you could spend it together, and it's gnawing at him.

Dressing in his usual jeans and a plain t-shirt, he can't shake off the frustration. He was so looking forward to spending the day with you. Why does some stuffy old man in a suit get to decide whether or not you get to spend the day with your husband?

As he descends the creaking stairs, Joel can't help but sigh. Despite all of his annoyance, he was going to make this the best damn work day as possible for you. He'd start by making you breakfast. The sizzle of the frying pan fills the kitchen, filling him with the smell of victory. I can do this. I can make today good.

As Joel daydreams about different methods of torture for your boss, you appear at the kitchen door, hair tousled, and a sleepy smile on your face. "Morning. You're up early. You should've slept in." You walk up behind him and give him a kiss on his back before taking your place at the dining table.

Joel grunts a vague response, not wanting to make a big deal out of the fact that he woke up earlier than he would have, just to make you breakfast before you head off to work. He places the food in front of you, kisses the top of your head, and tucks your hair behind your ears before sitting down next to you.

"Your boss is a real piece of work," he grumbles.

You smile sadly, clearly sharing his frustration, but you attempt to diffuse his irritation. "I'll talk to him, Joel. But we won't let this ruin our day, okay?" Finally, he gets a day off from his job, and all he wants to do is spend it with you, and he can't. Your heart aches.

Joel nods, his eyes softening just a fraction. "Yeah, yeah. I just think you deserve a break. You work so hard.”

You nod. “You know, despite my boss being a Grade A asshole, I really do like my job. And the money is good."

Joel nods silently in response. He can’t deny that. Ever since you got this job, you've both been living more comfortably than before. You got the kitchen renovated and managed to build him a shed to work on his woodwork projects. He loves it.

And God, he's so damn proud of you. You don’t know this, but he brags to all the guys at work about his girlfriend who works in a swanky new building in town and has her own office. "Where's your girl?" they ask when you miss out on a get-together they're having. "She's still working. Yeah, they're starting a new project, and she's leading it, so they need her there. Important stuff," he replies with a serious look on his face, but his heart swells with pride. My girlfriend is so fucking cool, he finds himself thinking often.

After the dishes are washed, and you've finished your coffee, you move to get the car keys. "Okay, I should get going. Thanks for breakfast, sweetheart. We're still having lunch together, right?”

Joel gets up with you and snatches the car keys from your hands. “I’ll drive. And yes, we are having lunch together.”

“Joel, go rest. I can drive–”

Already at the doorway by this point, Joel keeps walking towards the car and yells back at you, “Clock’s ticking, slowpoke. Don’t wanna be late. Get your ass in the car now.”

You shake your head, racing towards the car with your grumpy husband already in the driver’s seat, honking the horn like a lunatic and probably waking the whole neighborhood up.

--

Joel’s jaw is set with determination as he drives. He wants to spend every minute of his off day with you because that was the whole reason he took the day off in the first place. If that means driving through rush hour traffic to get you to work, so be it.

"You didn't have to do this, you know," you mumbled.

Joel gave a curt nod. "Damn right. That’s what makes me such a good husband.”

You smile and nod in agreement. As the car pulls up to a stop in front of the building, Joel turns to you.

“I'll pick you up later for lunch. Remember. We. Are. Having. Lunch. Together.” He enunciates each word loudly and clearly.

“I know, Joel.” You smile. Even through his grumpy old man antics, you can’t help but find him adorable.

“And that means, you say no if Mr Weasel–”

“Wessell.”

“Weasel asks you to go out for lunch with him and the team. Got it?”

“Yes, sir.”

“And if he insists that you go along, you give him my number and tell him to talk to me. Yes?”

“No.”

“Baby–”

You cut him off with a kiss on the lips. “I’ll be there. I love you. See you later.”

--

After you finish your lunch, you and Joel are walking back to the car, fingers laced together. You round a corner, and suddenly, you both catch a glimpse of Mr. Wessell exiting the restaurant opposite the street. The man was in the middle of a heated phone call, his face reddening as he yelled into the phone.

Joel's eyes narrow, and he clenches his jaw, his blood pressure rising. Although they’d never met, Joel recognized him from the company Facebook page that he only followed to see pictures of you at work. He couldn't help but scoff, "Now we can’t even go for lunch without seeing that dumbass?” 

You're quick to intervene. You cup your hand over Joel’s mouth and whisper, "Shut up, he might hear you.” 

With a hand cupped over his mouth, Joel didn’t look very menacing, but he made sure to shoot a glare at the man who was still distractedly yelling into his phone. 

You tug on Joel's arm, trying to pull him away. "Come on, let's go, little bulldog. Down boy."

Joel reluctantly gets dragged by you, your hand still cupped over his mouth. His voice comes out muffled as he glances back at your boss saying, "I’m gonna destroy him with my mind."

You keep dragging him along as you say in a placating voice. "Oh, I’m sure you can. Big scary grumpy old man. Now let’s stop playing John Wick and get to the car.” 

Joel narrows his eyes at you. You release his mouth and turn to face the street. You chuckle softly as you walk back to the car together. Your scary husband privileges amuse you to no end. It’s funny, but it’s also reassuring to know that he has your back if things go south.

--

"I am kinda like John Wick." Joel mumbles as you walk hand in hand back to the car.

"Joel, we are not having this conversation again. You are not like John Wick."

"No, you're right. I'm better."

Tag list: @just-some-random-blogger @joeldjarin @pattwtf

[eldritch-spouse]

Breg's s/o thinks he's blind so they walk around scantily clad because he can't see me and maybe they're I little bit of a voyer so if they're getting off and he's in the room they'll just be quiet because he doesn't need to know.. or does he?

[This is so good and absolutely hilarious, holy shit-]

(Minors dni)

Breg should have told you he wasn't blind a long time ago.

In retrospect, it makes sense why you'd assume he's blind. As a human, seeing a creature with smooth skin where eyes should normally lie, and no other vaguely ocular-shaped organs anywhere, you'd naturally assume he's visually impaired in some form. But Breg didn't realize you thought so until it was already too late for the reveal to not make him look like an awkward buffoon. Or an asshole.

He should have known when you asked for his hand to bring him into the supermarket. You thought he was lost outside, couldn't find his way in. Really, Breg was just looking at the display pictures outside- He was standing around, bored. Not only was it a great shock to see his soon-to-be mate approach him, to have you ask if he needed help, take his hand, and lead him in to go shopping for him... The breeder couldn't even put two and two together. He just held onto your tiny hand and nodded along to whatever you said, swooning the entire way.

And thus a weird sort of friendship formed. More of a pity thing, he can tell. Breg is not sure if you pity him because he's supposedly a huge blind monster in a world where everything is out of proportion for his stature or simply because he's a friendless, awkward loser who clearly craves companionship. Maybe a bit of both. Eitherway, even when Breg finally understood you thought he was blind, he couldn't bring himself to correct you. Because you'd treat him differently. You wouldn't care for him the same near zealous way you do now. The breeder doesn't want this to stop. Ever. And it's not like he has to pretend very hard, he can excuse some of his suspicious accuracy on his admittedly enhanced hearing and other inhuman qualities that you're not likely to question.

Plus, he gets to see some... Curious things.

Like you changing right in front of him as if it's nothing. Breg nearly had a heart attack the first time you did it, clawing your poor kitchen table and trying his damnedest to act normal- As if you weren't tits out staring at him. Please, every time he remembers that Breg bursts a blood vessel.

Don't even get him started on the times you've looked him up and down like he was a steak, such as now for example. Here Breg is, merely existing on your small living room couch, and you're sat on the other end, pretending to enjoy TV with him. Pretending, because he can clearly tell you're ogling him every single time he twists his head a little. Having your eyes so shamelessly poised on him is so fucking hot.

You look at the breeder as if he's the most attractive thing in the world and Breg is struggling so very hard to not just shatter the illusion and take you. Would you care if he let himself get hard? What if he pretended to not be aware of it? Is that too on the nose? Probably. So the monster suffers instead, taking note of the way you almost drool at him. When Breg sees you focus on his bare slit, not the first time you've done it, the monster shifts his legs apart subtly. Come on, touch him, fuck him, take a fucking picture or something, just- Calm down Breg, calm down.

It's probably just morbid curiosity. You were hospitable enough to let him undress in your home when he told you how much clothes bother him, and now you're just curious about his anatomy. Yeah, that's it- You're definitely not looking at his slightly flush slit like you want to stick your tongue right in it.

" Are you enjoying the movie so far, Breg? " You ask, angelic voice sounding perfectly normal even as you seem to be sizing him up. He damn near chokes when you silently remove your shirt. There's nothing underneath, you've been in your scarce pajamas ever since the movie started yet spoke as if you were fully dressed to the nines.

" Y-Yeah, sounds cool. " The breeder's tail wags idly. You might mistake the motion for glee concerning this frankly uninteresting comedy flick, but really, he's just a mutt happy to see you half-naked.

" Sweet, I'll go fetch more popcorn for us. " Ah yes, the popcorn he's been indiscriminately shoving in his gullet to distract himself. Right, great choice.

Breg's moment of respite lasts for a couple of blissful minutes until you walk back into view. Sure enough, there's a new bowl of popcorn in your hands. But you're also fucking naked. He understands why humans need religion now. He perks up immediately, and you notice this time.

" Hahah, were you able to smell the popcorn from there? " You laugh almost innocently.

Oh, the popcorn isn't the only thing he's smelling right now. " Yep. "

" You can have it, I don't want any right now. " And you hand it to him, bending to give him a perfect view of your tits. Breg has to force himself to remain impassive even as he gulps and takes the bowl.

" R-Really? Oh- Okay then. "

His mate sits opposite of him on the couch and spreads her legs, eyes fixed on him as she starts mutely playing with herself in plain sight. Are you serious right now?! The breeder makes a strategic move, placing the bowl on top of his lap to cover his slit and prevent him from getting exposed.

There's an expression of mild suffering on his face as Breg weeps internally over not being able to do anything but watch and smell while you get off. This... This is punishment for something, the monster's sure of it.

As is, Breg can only sadly gobble more popcorn in self-consolation and resist the urge to sob.

[erenenthusiast]

Pt.2 (© u/lemmesay1stupidthing on reddit)

Brief explanation:

Isayama once said that Mikasa is a character who 'expresses herself via actions and facial expressions quite a lot. I sometimes feel that that's why a lot of her personal story gets overlooked - because she's not loud about it, and nor is anyone else. She's one of the most reticent characters in the manga and, more importantly, deliberately written that way. It's intentional on Isayama's part for Mikasa to mostly 'express herself via actions and facial expressions', and so, as difficult as it might be to follow, that's mostly how her personal journey is told.

Mikasa’s flaw

In a 2016 interview, Isayama said: 'Mikasa's growth probably involves separation from Eren'. People generally stop at that and go from there - they either believe that Mikasa can't grow as a person unless Eren stops being important to her, or that a Mikasa who isn't separated from Eren (emotionally, mentally, or physically) is inherently a flawed character. Isayama's explanation of the 'separation' he means is never usually discussed, even though he actually does go on to clarify it: 'Mikasa's growth probably involves separation from Eren. By separation, I mean she might be able to return to that ordinary girl that she used to be in childhood'. If the all-important 'separation' for her growth is about Mikasa returning to the 'ordinary girl she used to be, it's worth asking what isn't ordinary about the girl Mikasa became, and when that change happened. And once that 'non-ordinary' quality about Mikasa becomes apparent, it can be identified as Mikasa's flaw; the deficiency in her character that we can expect her to overcome.

Mikasa loving someone or wanting to protect them isn't in itself a flaw. It's a fairly ordinary, reasonable thing, and it's something plenty of other characters already display in the story: Franz wants to protect Hanna; Ymir, Historia, Eren, Mikasa; Kenny, Uri; Levi, Erwin, and so on ad infinitum. There's a reason that Mikasa's love for and general protectiveness towards Eren never changes. It's because it's not something she was ever meant to 'grow past or 'get over'. It was never her flaw.

The flaw is her fear.

Mikasa's overprotectiveness of Eren is what isn't 'ordinary, because it's connected to her deep, abiding fear of loss. Her desire to constantly stay by him is pitiful because, above all else, it represents her fear and her mistrust of the world. And it's why her 'separation' from him is about more than Mikasa's Fear.

This fear Mikasa has for Eren begins at a very particular point in the story which we build up to from here:

Mikasa and Eren's first significant spat is over his wanting to join the SC. She thinks it's too dangerous, and her fear is understandable. Our first view of the SC's return is cuts and blood and gore, and we - and Mikasa - watch a mother receive the paltry remains of her son:

Cuts and blood and gore are already how Mikasa lost one family:

And it's what Eren puts himself in danger of by going out into the world with the SC. Mikasa is afraid of losing him to the violence of the world, and she sees that fear reflected in Carla.

Mikasa has already seen how Moses' mother lost her son. And if, like Moses, Eren goes beyond the Walls with the SC, Carla might also eventually find herself holding nothing of her son but a single hand. So Mikasa makes her a promise:

But it wasn't Eren she needed to worry about after all.

This is the point at which Mikasa's fear begins.

Because all she has left from the carnage is Eren, Mikasa will never let happen to him what happened to her parents and to Carla. She is his protector. That is a role that she's chosen, and, to some extent, been given. This protection is built on her love for Eren, but also powerfully informed by her fear of the world; the world which hurts, maims, and kills people. The result of this fear is Mikasa's inability to trust anyone or anything with Eren, not even himself. She believes that she is the only one who can stop bad things from happening to Eren; that if she's not there, he will die.

So when Mikasa is pushed into a situation where she thinks Eren will be in danger, she prioritises Eren. Other considerations are pushed aside in favour of her one true goal: making sure she's there to keep him alive. But in the world of the SC, Mikasa is challenged on that immediately. Not just by Eren, but also by what happens in Trost. Mikasa saves innocent citizens from Reeves' greed and cruelty, and from titans.

Mikasa being confronted with things that are more important than always being with Eren happens fairly often to her. She also pretty consistently allows space for these 'other things, sometimes to her own surprise. The first time she's made to realise this about herself is in the Female Titan arc, when Levi points out that maybe she had 'selfish desires' for which she wanted to kill Annie.

That whole incident with Levi in Chapter 30 is significant for Mikasa's development in a few different ways.

1. When Levi says they'll focus on one objective and that won't include outright killing Annie, Mikasa's one objection is: 'How many of our comrades has she murdered?' Mikasa has no problem being straightforward with Levi. If her first and only consideration was Eren, she'd voice it. She'd even get away with it, because they all need Eren at this point. But instead, she reveals that she has a separate, personal desire: avenging their dead. Mikasa wants to kill Annie for her own reasons.

2. Levi states that their goal is to retrieve Eren. He gives himself the main role of 'slash[ing] away' at the titan, meaning that he will be the one to actually save Eren, who is in the titan's mouth. And he gives Mikasa the job of distracting Annie. Mikasa accepts a secondary role in a plan that is specifically to rescue Eren.

3. And when she does break from the plan, it's not so she can go and get Eren herself. Mikasa risks the objective of the mission - and Levi, and Eren - by going in for the kill. Mikasa risks the plan to save Eren by acting on her own desire to kill Annie.

Two important shifts take place here for Mikasa. One, she entrusts Eren to someone else, as demonstrated by her action of allowing Levi to take the lead. Two, her focus stops being, even for a short while, Eren - as confirmed by her facial expression when Levi challenges her on it, because she doesn't seem to immediately realise she's even capable of that:

The objective was: Forget killing the Titan. Rescue Eren. And Mikasa, for no matter how short a time, lost sight of that.

The fearful, overprotective aspect of Mikasa's relationship with Eren is beginning to change, because her relationship with the rest of her world is beginning to change. With his rescue of Eren in the forest, Levi proves to Mikasa that other people are just as capable of protecting Eren as she is. And if she happens to take her mind off Eren for a bit, it doesn't mean he'll die.

This is where the 'separation' begins. Mikasa starts to accept distance between herself and Eren; the distance of being able to trust others with him, of not needing to constantly be with him and personally oversee his safety. And it leads to this watershed moment in the Uprising arc:

Mikasa. Whilst Eren has been kidnapped. And all they know is that he's inside a coffin with some random undertaker at some random inn. Maybe.

In Chapter 4, Mikasa couldn't handle Eren being in a different part of the city from her during a mission because of how afraid she was that he'd die without her. In Chapter 30, she let Levi take the lead on getting Eren back, and was shocked when she realised that, even for an instant, she'd prioritised something else over him. In Chapter 57, Eren's been kidnapped, no one's been certain for two days about where he is or what's happening to him, and Mikasa is, well, as pictured above.

The debilitating fear that used to tie Mikasa to Eren is gone for good. She's finally let Eren go, and discovered that it doesn't mean she'll lose him.

Mikasa's separation from Eren = her beginning to trust the rest of the world not to stab him in the chest, almost behead him, or eat him alive whilst she's not there. It's good for her because it means she stops being so terrified that she'll lose Eren, not because it means she'll stop loving him or wanting him to be safe.

My perspective on Mikasa is that she's not a very obvious character when it comes to development, and so she sometimes appears static. And because so much of her drive is Eren, a lot of fans look to her relationship with Eren to change for proof that she's somehow developed. But Mikasa's obstacle, her personal flaw, isn't Eren himself, and never has been. Her flaw has always been her deep and debilitating fear about losing the people she loves - Eren and Armin - and her inability to put trust on them. But with the series proceeding it changes. It's good for her because it means she stops being so terrified that she'll lose Eren, not because it means she'll stop loving him or wanting him to be safe. And she reached that point of separation a long time ago in the manga.