addicted2coke-theothercoke

[addicted2coke-theothercoke]

"There's no longer language, only recognition"

is an insanely powerful line

And it comes from a Lemon Demon bonus track about the Pepsi logo

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Pizzagram making my heart skip a beat

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Thought this might help others who struggle when writing. I know I get in my head too much.

[addicted2coke-theothercoke]

Bought a laptop for college and picked a windows to save me the hassle. The disgust and betrayal at being forced to log in with a Microsoft account, which I did not have, just to use a thousand dollar laptop. I want to kill

Gonna look into Linux next time and live with the hassle

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it's already been posted on my account somewhere

Feeling the urge to unleash a terrible knock knock joke upon the world

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I can not be trusted with money

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The one time I went out of my way to make a serious character for DND it instantly broke into absurdity and asking about gruel cause it was the only way to have fun with that party

No hate to the party. That DM is still inexperienced (and I'm not better), and one of our players didn't know what you do, but the other two have been playing for decades and still it felt kinda stilted

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No that's Owl

Knock knock

who's there?

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Why are men's hats so boring or doucheee

They're the only ones that fit my head

Every cool hat I see is for a 22.8 circumference AT MAX

annoying.

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Winnie the Pooh

Knock knock

who's there?

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Feeling the urge to unleash a terrible knock knock joke upon the world

[addicted2coke-theothercoke]

No One in the Diner

In the diner, Hazel sat at one end of the two-seater booth, sipping a cup of coffee. Dame sat at the other, carefully working his way through a three-stacked burger that dripped cheese and grease on his napkin.

Between them was a stack of slightly stale bread sticks dripping in oil. They had been brought out by a punk-haired waitress, who like usual observed the two men with a smirk. She was always the one to serve them, and they amused her. It was the way they acted: like men of different cultures, carefully restrained and observant.

Besides the sticks, there was a built-in screen on their booth table which usually showed weather reports and traffic updates. It interrupted these to display a two minute ad for Goldkin ENF, which had a jingle that Dame called slay bells on the horse of Gluttony. He tried to say it in a whimsical, semi-satirical manner, to not bother Hazel. It didn't work.

When the ad came to its end Hazel sat down his mug and drew in his breath sharply. He waited patiently for Dame to begin at his own pace. Although while doing so, he imagined many places he would rather be at that moment.

"It's vile that we can't even eat without hearing Goldkin’s insistent brain warm—vile. All I ask is to have my thirty minutes of peace but even that isn't afforded as you'll hear Goldkin on every screen.”

“I hardly could.”

Dame dropped his burger onto a flimsy box, sending juices flying to an adjacent booth. He took his napkins and quickly cleaned up his hands, scrubbing vigorously. He liked to gesture a lot when he was mad, and he didn't want arrant flicks of burger hitting Hazel in the lenses, even though Hazel was annoying him with his drawn out sip.

“That,” he started as he balled up his napkins and sat them in the lid of the box, “is precisely why Goldkin is an invasive monster. You can't hear it. You've taken Goldkin ENF, you get your biweekly injections in the mail, and it filters out the ad. I, on the other hand, am constantly aware of this torture. They're trying to break me down. It won't be long till everyone has it—why did you hear they're lobbying for prepubescent use?”

“If it's not safe I'm sure it won't get passed. Even then it would be very unlikely.”

“Nothing is very unlikely when you've worked your way into the brains of two billion people, and amassed more in trading than all the gold vaults of the world. It will pass. I wish hell upon the parents who sign off on it!”

Hazel was thankful that Dame’s outburst didn't draw very much attention in the diner. It had been filtered out by the ENF for being overly voluminous and aggressive.

As Dame finished his burger, Hazel caught the attention of the punk-haired waitress and ordered a slice of New York style cheesecake. Dame requested a chocolate smoothie, and he asked for the cherry to be removed.

Just after the waitress got out of ear shot Hazel finished the last of his coffee and quietly said, “you know I've never regretted it.”

[addicted2coke-theothercoke]

Im so happy tumblr put me on Columbo yall werent even 5% exaggerating. Hes a scrungly guy who keeps saying "my wife" and "one more thing" and has a funny diction and wears rumpled clothes and lets everyone underestimate him and is so inexplicably fuckable my god

[addicted2coke-theothercoke]

Just Columbo being Columbo ✦ ✦ Columbo Seasons 1 & 2

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It's in no way a new thought. In fact, I'd go as far to say it's an old thought. But I'm contributing to it anyways

Columbo easily beats Light

Is this an opinion I'm educated enough to have? No. I've seen one episode, and otherwise only had it described to be over the course of two hours. But I know two things:

ONE: Light has a raging ego

TWO: While maybe Columbo isn't as smart as L, Columbo is at his best when going against people with raging egos. He's at his best when he goes against people smarter then him

He fucks with them

And there is no doubt in my mind that Columbo would be the end of Light in only 90 minutes

[addicted2coke-theothercoke]

Throwback to this classic and its continuations