#I could talk abt this au all day. I won't but I could

[septimus-heap]

Merrin being a trans girl is. So funny. I'm obsessed with her

[sleepyhoon]

✰ pairing. — emo!hs x reader

✰ genre. — early 2000s au, best friend's older brother, childhood friends to lovers, smut, light angst.

✰ word count. — 7k+

✰ warnings. — swearing, family issues, partying, mentions of drinking/drugs, friendship betrayal (?), smut [virginity loss, teasing, fingering, soft dom!hs, "i've waited so long for this" type shit], reader and hs are both 18+, minors dni. very cliche shit. reader doesn’t know much abt sex tbh.

✰ synopsis. — Love notes were slipped into your locker on a daily basis. Variations of messy, boyish handwriting on yellow sticky notes stacked upon themselves by the end of each school day. Every Friday night you were invited out with the promise of, "You'll have fun, just give it a chance."

You could have any guy you wanted, no doubt about it. Yet somehow, the only one you do want is the tattooed, gothic one that lives a few doors down from your best friend.

✰ a/n. revamping this from my bts acc with heeseung this time bc im absolutely obsessed with this couple and need them to exist in every possible universe :P revamping part 2 as we speak and ill post in a few days hehe

✰ perm taglist. @intromortal @aanniikkaa @meetletsinmontauk @lovelyyf @right-person-wrong-time

———

Two monumental events had been etched into your brain for eternity, the first being sneaking out in the middle of the night to meet up with your friends at the community pool. The second is fifteen minutes upon arriving at the pool, seeing your best friend's older brother emerge from the chlorine-scented water as if he were Poseidon and realizing you were utterly infatuated by him.

Lee Chaeryeong isn't blind to this, immediately pulling you away from the crowd to question the longing gaze on your face. "Out of every fucking guy here with us, you're making eyes at my brother? You do know that Heeseung is completely gross, right?" She was so furious, you're surprised no steam was blowing from her ears.

Deny it all you want (and you certainly did within that fifteen-minute interrogation); Heeseung very clearly had a hold on you that lasted many years following that fateful night. He wasn't even your usual type; he wouldn't be caught dead around the guys you're typically drawn to. He had a rebellious side; maybe that's why getting him out of your head was nearly impossible.

Of course, the eternal guilt of falling for your best friend's older, dumbass brother is also difficult to get out of your head.

It can't be helped, really. Anytime you'd visit their home, your eyes would automatically wander through the crack of his doorway as you'd pass by. Whether he was messily cutting his dark hair while blasting Pierce the Veil from his speakers or giving himself a new Stick-and-Poke tattoo as he waited for a CD to finish burning, you long to break away from Chaeryeong for a moment to speak to him. Ask him about his day or if his band had any upcoming gigs. You'd even talk to him about paint drying if it meant you'd get to be in the same space as him.

So it's safe to say you were completely heartbroken when he left for college. Chaeryeong, however, is over the moon. Or so you think.

"… He's your brother, though. You don't think you're gonna miss him at all?" You ask, watching Chaeryeong delicately paint your fingernails a pretty shade of purple.

She shrugs, "I mean… it's definitely gonna be weird not seeing him around the house every day, but he'll still visit sometimes. Maybe."

Deep down, Chaeryeong knows Heeseung won't visit much. He'd been craving freedom and independence from their parents for ages, and moving away for college gave him the perfect opportunity to live as he pleased. They weren't fond of the clothes he wore or the friends he had, and absolutely couldn't bear the music his band makes. They criticized every little thing about him, and he'd finally be getting a break from them.

As you're about to ask Chaeryeong if she's okay, she stands from her bed, screwing the nail polish closed. "I'll be back. I have to let Bam out." Her voice is shaky, and she doesn't look at you as she exits the room.

You take the opportunity to make your way down the hall and to Heeseung's door, which he has conveniently left wide open as he scrolls on his desktop. His knees are pressed against his chest as he's heavily focused on editing his Facebook page. There's a rock song playing lightly from another tab that you can't quite identify; he uses his free hand to gently tap along to the beat of the music.

His room is covered in cardboard boxes, soon to be packed into his parents' minivan and making their way to the University of San Francisco dorms.

Your knuckles tap on his wooden door, your heart fluttering when he turns around, and you realize he's changed the ring on his lip from black to silver.

He nods at you, "What's up?"

"Nothing. I just know you're leaving in the morning, and I wanted to say bye. And wish you good luck, of course." You're not sure why you're so heartbroken. It's not like the two of you were ever a thing. It's not like this would be your last time seeing him. Why were you so upset?

"Cool, thanks." You assume that was his way of indirectly telling you to get out until he reaches into his desk drawer and says, "Catch," before tossing something towards you.

Careful not to mess up your manicure, you easily catch the item, unfolding what appears to be a purple bandanna. "What's this for?" You ask, inspecting the material in your palms.

"To remember me by, duh. Plus, it matches your nails.”

It'd be silly to tell him you genuinely don't need this because there was no way in hell you could ever forget about him. Instead, you clutch the bandana tightly in your fist and make a silent vow to keep it with you at all times; have a piece of him with you at all times.

You thank him and tell him it's nice, but all you can wonder is why he even wants you to remember him in the first place. Maybe you're overthinking. He probably just didn't care for the useless accessory anymore.

When you turn to leave, Heeseung stops you with a gentle call of your name. He turns his head in your direction, tugging his bottom lip between his teeth. "Can I tell you something?"

"Anything." You whisper back, praying you don't sound overly desperate for a more extended interaction with him.

A beat of silence passes, and just as he opens his mouth to respond, Chaeryeong is stomping up the stairs and belting out your name. You gaze away from Heeseung to glance behind you, listening as his sister shouts about doing each other's makeup.

"Never mind, actually. It's not important." Heeseung interrupts, and you physically feel your heart sink to the floor.

You're about to be annoying and pry a response out of him until your eyes dart to his floor, and you see it. What slipped out from his drawer when he tossed the bandana at you.

A condom wrapper. An empty one, at that.

It's embarrassing how quickly your vision becomes glossy, salty tears threatening to release with each passing second. Of course, he's fucking someone. Of course, that person isn't you. Of fucking course.

You shouldn't be surprised; he's probably more into girls with a similar aesthetic. She's probably covered in tattoos and piercings, just like him. She's probably older than you and may even have her own car, unlike you, who still had to catch rides with your parents or older sister.

It's odd, though. You're not entirely naive; you know Heeseung definitely flirts with you here and there, catching his eye when his gaze lingers on you for a second too long. There's a noticeable tension between the two of you that even your parents have teased about. And this whole time, he's been screwing someone else?

Heeseung hangs out with so many girls it'd be useless to even attempt to uncover who this mystery person is. It's none of your business, anyway.

So you leave.

You tell Chaeryeong you'll get grounded if you're home past curfew, and with tear-stained cheeks, you run home.

The following day isn't any easier.

Chaeryeong posted a photo on FaceBook of herself and Heeseung posing together, arms wrapped around each other, with the caption "c u l8r alligator XD". The comments are already flooded with responses wishing Heeseung farewell, some from family members or friends of the siblings.

"Don't 4get abt me!!!!!! >:( "from a girl with red hair catches your eye because it's the only one Heeseung responded to. You can't bring yourself to read his full reply, fingers moving to quickly close the tab after seeing the word 'Never.'

It's probably her, you think to yourself, the one he's sleeping with.

Maybe it's for the best that Heeseung's moving away; it'll give you some time to get over him.

And you most certainly did.

The only time he ever crosses your mind is when Chaeryeong brings him up (which she rarely does) or when you pass by his empty bedroom. Deep down, you know you'll always care for Heeseung on some level, but time away from him was just what you needed. You were too attached to him for no fathomable reason, rejecting any guy interested in you with the premise of being loyal to a guy who didn't even want you. He'd probably been sneaking girls in through his window, with you a few doors down doing magazine quizzes with his sister; blissfully unaware of what was happening down the hall.

You’re better off without him.

That's what you've been telling yourself daily until now. It's the start of summer vacation, and Heeseung's been summoned home to spend it with his family before Chaeryeong (and you) transfer to the University of San Francisco.

Heeseung was hesitant about coming home, as he always is. In constant fear that his parents have some elaborate plan for him to change his major or set him up with someone they deem acceptable, nothing like the girls he hangs around and probably invites back to his dorm.

It took days of convincing until Heeseung finally agreed to come home, under the premise that his parents' intentions were pure and that they simply wanted one last summer together before Chaeryeong moved away for college. They also hoped he'd be able to house-sit and watch over Chaeryeong for a few days as they took their annual anniversary trip to San Diego. That, however, took some bribing and the promise of gas money on their end.

He's not due to arrive until tomorrow morning, and you've convinced yourself there's no reason for you to see him right away. You'd be fine if the next time you saw him was in a few months as you're moving into your dorm. After years of longing, you've finally moved on from him.

Some of you have debated telling Chaeryeong about your past feelings for her brother, but there's no point. It was a one-sided relationship with absolutely zero depth, nothing worth discussing. So when she nudges your side and asks if you're interested in anyone, you reply with a shake of your head.

Chaeryeong has no reaction to this; she can't remember the last time you've been into anyone despite having the entire male population at your school practically throwing themselves at you. "Maybe you'll meet someone tonight."

She's referencing the house party you're going to, which she practically had to drag you out of your room to attend. Parties are different from your scene, especially on a day like today when you were hoping to have a girls' night with Chaeryeong. She had other plans, however.

"Maybe," you respond, sighing as the house you're attending is finally in your viewpoint. "We're not staying long, right? It looks packed."

Cars are parked throughout the street, one house, in particular, being the center of attention with loud music and drunk people decorating the front yard of a suburban-looking home. Chaeryeong looks as ecstatic as ever, looping her arm in yours and picking up her pace. She doesn't respond. It doesn't matter. Her response would've disregarded your concern.

One car catches your eye as you enter the unfamiliar house; it's parked towards the end of the street, and you swear you've been in it before. You're not able to dwell on it for too long, though, because Chaeryeong has to practically yank you through the front door.

Your nerves are at an all-time high. The music is entirely too loud, and there isn't a single sober person in sight. You're not sure how Chaeryeong even found out about this party, but you really wish she would've left you out of it. You'd go now if it were acceptable, but Chaeryeong would've stayed regardless, and you refuse to leave her alone. So, you push your feelings to the side and take her hand as she leads you towards the kitchen.

"Thirsty?" Chaeryeong questions, forcing a red solo cup into your hand.

"Not at all," you respond, sighing as Chaeryeong pours something into your cup.

"It's just ginger ale," she reassures you, "I don't think either of us should get drunk here." For once, she's being reasonable.

Chaeryeong suggests you do a lap around the house in hopes of running into people you may have gone to school with. And to your surprise, a decent amount of your past classmates have decided to attend. You feel more at ease with them around, a bit more comfortable now that you're around recognizable people. Although you initially hesitated to show up, you're glad you did.

"Anybody catch your eye yet? Or are you still breaking hearts?" Your old classmate, Yeoreum, questions.

You shake your head, about to explain that you're not interested in dating right now, until she gestures behind you. "That guy is pretty cute."

You shift on the couch, looking around until you spot who Yeoreum had been gesturing towards. You locate him finally, and she's right; he is cute. He just seems so familiar.

That's when it hits you.

"Oh my God," you whisper, eyes locked on him, and you slowly rise from the couch.

It's Heeseung. And the car you recognized was his. He's here. What is he doing here? He isn't due to be back until tomorrow morning.

You almost don't realize it's him until you spot the mole under his lip. He's grown his hair out and stopped dyeing it, the slew of tattoos that decorated his arm (God, did he start working out, too?) nicely connected, now creating a sleeve, and he's given himself an eyebrow piercing. Your feelings for him come rushing back in full force.

Panicked, you reach for Chaeryeong's hand, but she's nowhere to be found. Careful not to be seen by her brother, you bow your head slightly, passing through a crowd of sweaty bodies until you finally spot her kitty heels. She's leaned against a wall, swirling around her cup while flirting with some guy you'd seen around school a few times.

Creating some much-needed distance between the two, you tug Chaeryeong towards you. "I think I just saw your brother."

"What? No, he won't even be in the city until tomorrow morning."

Frustrated, you quickly search the crowd until your eyes land on him again. You ignore the fact that he's now speaking to some girl with red hair and tattoos scattered across her arm and point in their direction, "Well, then that guy looks just like him."

Chaeryeong squints her eyes in disbelief at the boy in question until the doubt becomes confusion, and the confusion becomes realization. "Oh my God! The fuck is he doing here?" She turns towards you as if you're supposed to have the answer.

"The fuck should I know? You said he wouldn't be here until tomorrow morning!"

"Because that's what he told our parents! How was I supposed to know he was gonna be here? I never would've come if I knew!"

"What are you guys doing here?" A voice you haven't heard in so long interrupts. You don't even want to turn around.

"What are you doing here?" Chaeryeong throws back, and the two stare at each other in angry silence for a moment until Heeseung steps to the side. "Upstairs," he says, nodding towards the staircase.

"But—"

"Go."

Chaeryeong's clearly aggravated but makes her way towards the stairs. You remain in place with your arms crossed, raising a brow in confusion when Heeseung looks at you. "What?"

"You too."

"I'm not—"

"I'm not asking again," he says simply. You convince yourself that you only take his command because you don't feel like fighting. Definitely not because it's interesting to have him boss you around.

Trudging up the stairs behind Chaeryeong, you wait with her in the hallway until Heeseung arrives. "Come on," he says, entering a bathroom and turning the light on. Neither you nor Chaeryeong protest; there really isn't any point.

As soon as the door is shut, Chaeryeong is yelling at the top of her lungs. "What the fuck are you doing here?! You said you wouldn't be back until tomorrow morning! Mom and Dad had to push their trip back just to give you more time to arrive, and you're already fucking here?! The fuck is the matter with you?!"

"I'm not gonna respond if you're gonna be yelling like this." Heeseung says calmly, leaning against the sink, "Let me get my questions out first, then I'll answer any of yours, deal?"

Chaeryeong glances over at you, sitting on the bathtub's edge, and you nod. She returns her attention back to Heeseung, takes a deep breath, then agrees.

"Now, what are you guys doing here?! How'd you even get invited?! And you're drinking?!" The calm demeanor from earlier slips away in a matter of seconds, clearly a hoax just to get Chaeryeong to calm down enough to let him speak.

"It's just ginger ale, and we've barely even had any! We were invited by our friends, okay? We have just as much right to be here as you do."

Heeseung scoffs, clearly unamused. "Right, and I'm assuming Mom and Dad know you're here then, huh?"

Chaeryeong nervously tucks a hair behind her ear. You wonder why you even have to be in here with them. It's not like Heeseung is your brother, anyway.

"We told our parents that we were going to a birthday party at a friend's house." Chaeryeong mumbles, barely able to look Heeseung in the eye.

"And what did they say when they dropped you guys off?"

"They didn't drop us off," you interrupt, "we walked here."

"Well, I wasn't gonna tell him that." Chaeryeong glares at you, it takes every bone in your body to not to laugh at her.

You're so over this. You didn't want to attend this dumb party in the first place, and seeing Heeseung flirting with some girl who could've been his female counterpart was the icing on the cake. It doesn't matter if your feelings for him were gone before tonight; every little emotion you'd felt for him over the years had returned (as if they ever left).

"And how exactly did you two geniuses plan on getting home?"

"Same way we got here."

"Can you please just let me handle this? Jesus Christ…" Chaeryeong shoots another frustrated glare at you, and you can't help but roll your eyes at her. She turns back towards her brother, "Can you answer my questions now?"

Heeseung's eyes anxiously dart around the cramped bathroom, landing on you a few times before he's slowly nodding his head. "Alright, Mom and Dad basically forced me to spend the whole summer here, and I kept asking myself why they were so persistent about it. They finally told me they needed me to watch over you and the house for their stupid trip. I had plans too, you know? That I had to derail for them. My band could've spent this summer touring, making real money, and now we can't. So, they wanna inconvenience me? I'll inconvenience them right back."

"…Inconvenience them by doing what?" Chaeryeong asks the exact question you had.

Heeseung shrugs, "By telling them I'm gonna be arriving a day late, duh."

You and Chaeryeong exchange an awkward glance at one other before silently agreeing not to tease him about it. If this was his badass way of retaliating, who were you to rain on his parade?

"Are you gonna tell anyone you saw us here?" Chaeryeong questions, a noticible tremble in her voice.

"As long as you guys don't tell anyone you saw me."

It's a fair trade, you accept it. You're even more delighted when Heeseung says he's taking the two of you home. Chaeryeong, however, isn't too happy about this, claiming there were so many people she didn't get to speak to, and how'd this be the last time she'd get to see them before moving away for school. You're not sure if Chaeryeong is really good at getting what she wants, or if Heeseung was tired of hearing her complain, but he finally gives in and grants her ten more minutes to socialize before meeting him at his car.

"If you're not at my car in ten minutes, I swear to God I'm calling mom." Heeseung scolds, holding the bathroom door open as the three of you finally exit.

A loud, drunk voice suddenly shouts, "Woah, Heeseung! Two girls at the same time!? You fucking beast!"

"They're my sisters, you fucking pervert!" He shouts back.

You can't even dwell on how disgusting the original comment was, only being able to focus on the fact that Heeseung just referred to you as his sister. As conceited as it may sound, you're not used to rejection or guys putting you in the friend-zone. Whatever little game Heeseung had been playing with you over the years was completely new territory. And right when you think things couldn't possibly get any worse, he calls you his sister.

What the actual fuck.

—

The next ten minutes go by in a blur; Chaeryeong has ditched you for a second time that night to talk to the guy from earlier. When it's finally time to leave, you find her Sat on his lap with her arm hung across his shoulder, laughing at an unfunny pickup line he'd used on her.

"It's time, Chaeryeong," you interrupt, helping her stand.

"Wait, wait, wait," she persists, directing her attention back to the boy, "tomorrow at five, right?"

"And not a second later." He sends her a disgusting wink that makes your skin crawl.

Chaeryeong is so love-struck you're surprised there isn't an arrow lodged in her back. She can barely form a proper sentence, erupting into a fit of giggles every few seconds as you make your way to Heeseung's car. "Wasn't he just gorgeous?"

You shrug, linking arms with her. "He was alright."

Stunned, Chaeryeong gasps at you, "Just alright? He was literally like a Greek God."

"I'm not saying he's unattractive; he's just...not really my type."

"And what is your type, Miss. Never-Has-Been-Interested-In-Anyone?"

Now, there's the question of the hour. You have to word your response very carefully; don't be too obvious about the fact that your ideal type is her older sibling.

"I guess I prefer guys with an edgier look to them, you know? Tattoos, piercings..." Despite your attempt to sound as nonchalant as possible, your heart is beating out of your chest from the mild confession.

Chaeryeong snickers, then playfully groans. "It sounds like you're describing my brother."

Now, you really have to test the waters.

"Since you brought him up, would it be so bad if I did like Heeseung? Hypothetically speaking, of course." You're not sure what prompts you to even ask this. It's not like he's even interested in you; he literally just referred to you as his sister.

A beat of silence passes as Chaeryeong gathers her thoughts, then she says, "No."

"What?"

You've finally reached Heeseung's car at this point, beating him there. You sit atop the trunk, feet hovering above the ground as the cold, nighttime air swirls around you. Chaeryeong shakes her head, "Obviously, it wouldn't be the ideal situation, but I guess I wouldn't mind as long as you talked to me about it first."

"First?" You mimic.

"Like...assuming you'd wanna date him or something. Just so I'm not blindsided, you know?"

This is the last thing you would've expected your impulsive, hotheaded (yet oh-so-loveable) best friend to be reasonable about. Mainly because she lectured you for nearly twenty minutes when she first suspected you had a crush on Heeseung.

You go to respond, but Heeseung, finally arriving at the car, captivates both of your attention. He finishes off his can of Pepsi before crushing the aluminum and tossing it to the ground. "Ready?" He questions.

There's no point in giving him a speech about littering; you're just ready to go home.

He fishes his keys from his pocket and unlocks the car door; Chaeryeong opens the backseat and jumps in before you have the chance, sprawling across the aged leather. "Move over," you nudge her foot with your knee; she pulls away from you.

Heeseung calls your name, "Just sit up front. She's not gonna move."

Now, this is new. You've ridden in the backseat of his car with Chaeryeong more times than you can count; he'd never allow either of you to sit shotgun with him; typical annoying older brother bullshit.

Don't make a big deal out of this, you say to yourself, climbing into the passenger seat of his car.

Chaeryeong and Heeseung bicker the entire ride to their parent's house, partially out of annoyance with each other, but you also get the feeling that neither of them were genuinely ready to leave the party. You're surprised Heeseung even enjoyed parties; he spent most of high school either working, hanging out at skate parks, or practicing with his band in their garage. College must've really changed him, and you're unsure how to feel about it.

Heeseung parks a few houses down from their parent's house and unlocks the doors, "Get out," he says into the backseat.

"Where are you gonna spend the night?" Chaeryeong questions, stretching her arms outward.

"I checked into a motel this morning. I'll be back here tomorrow around noon. And, hey," Heeseung turns around, pointing a finger at his sister. "Don't tell them you saw me."

Mockingly, Chaeryeong points a finger right back at him. "Telling them I saw you would be exposing myself, cock-sucker. Leave me alone." She angrily begins to climb out of the car, annoyed at how little trust Heeseung had in her.

You turn to go, but Heeseung's cold hand on your bicep stops you, "Where you goin'?"

"I'm gonna walk home from here. It's only a few minutes away," you respond.

Heeseung shakes his head, "I'm dropping you off. You haven't moved since I left, right?"

"No, but it's fi—"

"Then your house is on the way to my motel. We're going in the same direction; might as well ride together."

It truly does make more sense to ride together, and rejecting his offer any further surely would raise suspicions. You don't want either of them to believe you'd feel uncomfortable being alone with Heeseung because that couldn't be farther from the truth. You're perplexed about your feelings now, and you don't want to do anything you'd regret just because of the confusion.

"Okay, then." You glance over your shoulder at Chaeryeong, "Will you need any help getting ready for your date tomorrow?"

Suddenly embarrassed, Chaeryeong shushes you, gesturing that Heeseung is literally right next to you and would prefer that he didn't hear about her dating life. Heeseung genuinely couldn't care less and is instead patiently waiting for his sister to get out.

She does finally, and Heeseung resumes his path to your house. He turns the radio on, switching between stations until he stops on one that's playing a song he's familiar with. You drive silently for a few minutes; the only sounds being heard are the distant noises from the car's motor and Heeseung humming along to the radio.

He breaks the silence by saying, "I was surprised to see you back there. You never really seemed like the type to enjoy parties."

You chuckle, "I could say the same for you; I don't remember you attending any in high school."

"That's 'cause house parties weren't my thing," he explains, "I went to raves or parties that would happen at the skate park. I don't really like being at someone else's house for too long; it feels too intimate."

Now that you think of it, skate park parties and raves seem much more like his scene.

"Well, I only went because Chaeryeong was going, and I didn't feel comfortable with her being there alone. Otherwise, I never would've gone." You admit, resting your head against the window.

"Thanks for looking after her, by the way. You're a good friend."

"I'd do anything for her." Your voice is barely a whisper now, getting quieter with every word you say.

Silence passes, and he says, "Did you know your guys' dorm room is gonna be right under ours?"

"Seriously?" You respond, genuinely curious.

"Mmm-hmm. My roommate, Sunghoon, and I are gonna be the worst upstairs neighbors ever." He teases as you roll your eyes. Your mind can't decipher whether this banter is playful & platonic or romantic. Everything Heeseung does confuses you.

"If that's the case, I'll be sure to move to an entirely new building."

"What, so you can have your boyfriend protect you?"

Pause. Boyfriend?

You nearly give yourself whiplash from how hard you spun around to look at Heeseung. "Boyfriend?" You ask.

He shrugs nonchalantly, keeping his eyes on the road. "I just assumed you'd have one by now. Do you?"

There he is again with his mind games. What the fuck was he talking about?

After letting out a very frustrated sigh, you mumble, "No, Heeseung, I do not have a boyfriend."

"Good. Focus on school."

Now he's pissing you off. You wish he'd shut up for the rest of the car ride. "It's nice to see you again, by the way."

Holy shit, you feel like jumping out the window.

"Yeah, great seeing you too. Oh, there's my house. I can walk from here." You make quick work of undoing your seatbelt.

"You sure? I can drop you off at the door."

"No, no. It's best if my parents don't see you so they don't accidentally tell your parents that they saw you." You lie, racking your brain for any excuse imaginable.

He nods, deciding it's best to drop you off a little further from your house. "Then, I'll see you tomorrow?"

"What?" You stop dead in your tracks, one hand clutching the door handle.

"Aren't you coming over tomorrow to help Chaeryeong get ready for her…thing? I'll be back home by then."

He's right; you'd be back in his house, and he'll be there this time. It's no big deal. You'd only be there for an hour (at most) to help her prepare, and then you could go the whole summer without seeing him again.

"Yeah, I'll see you then."

The following day, Chaeryeong is back to her unreasonable self, expecting you to wait at her house for her to return from her date.

"Please? We're just going to get pizza; we won't even be gone that long." She pleads, adding the finishing touches to her makeup.

You'd already spent over an hour helping her prepare, and now she expects you to do nothing but await her return. You know her heart's in the right place; she just wants to be the first to hear all the exhilarating details about her date. Still, a phone call would suffice.

"What am I supposed to do while I wait for you to come back?" You whine.

"Just hang out here! Watch a movie or something!" She suggests, trying her absolutely hardest to sound enthusiastic. Her phone buzzes in her hand before she has the chance to continue, eyes lighting up as they flicker across the bright screen.

Chaeryeong clutches her phone, locks eyes with you, then rushes towards the door. You're faster, though, quickly capturing her wrist before she's barely reached the hallway. "I'm going home."

"No! If you stay here, I'll bring you back pizza, and we can have a girls' night like we were supposed to yesterday! Come on, please?" She begs, pouting her lips.

You go to reply, but the bathroom door swings open, and Heeseung strides out. Just to your luck, he's shirtless; water droplets descend from his hair as he towel-dries it. As he enters his bedroom, he mocks his sister's high-pitched whine, earning a lethal glare and a slew of swears thrown at him.

Perhaps you should stay.

"Fine, but you're lending me your pajamas." You give in, earning an enthusiastic shriek from your best friend.

Chaeryeong wraps you in a brief, yet tight, hug before shouting, "Be back soon!" Then she's rushing down the stairs and out the front door. It's not often that Chaeryeong makes you wait for her return, but you absolutely despise it whenever it does occur. She's never back by the time she promises and gets upset when you try to call and check up on her.

And speaking of calling, you're sure your phone is dead by now. You insisted Chaeryeong bring her's along just in case, so you're left with one option.

Heeseung's door is wide open (as usual) when you go to knock. He's fully clothed now, pairing his black sweatpants with a matching black t-shirt. His hair appears mostly dry now, chaotic as ever, but dry. You don't think he's ever looked this good before.

He's sat on his bed, flipping through the latest copy of Rolling Stone when you arrive. He glances over at you and lets out a dry chuckle.

"What's so funny?" You ask.

"You're dressed like Bella Swan." He responds casually, eyes raking up and down your body.

"Who?"

"From Twilight. You know, that new movie that came out?" He seems genuinely surprised that you don't seem to know anything about this movie, not even the name of (who you suspect to be) the main character.

You lean against the doorframe, "Haven't seen it."

"It's a great movie, seriously. Some friends and I are seeing it in a few days if you and Chaeryeong wanna come." He suggests, flipping another page in the magazine.

You let him know you'll ask Chaeryeong if she's interested before remembering why you came to his room in the first place and ask if you can borrow his phone charger. Heeseung directs you to where it's plugged up by his desk, and you finally have the chance to stroll further into his room. You can't recall the last time you've been in here, but you know it looks much different than before. Many of the band posters that decorated the room were gone, his random trinkets and piles of clothes were gone, and not a single piece of his CD collection was in sight. It felt so lifeless, so unlike him. No wonder he always dreaded returning home; it probably didn't even feel like home to him.

"So," you say, attempting to break the silence, "you're here for the whole summer, huh?"

"Unfortunately." He mumbles, "Gonna try and go by sooner, convince my parents I have to sort out an issue with my dorm or something."

"It's nice to have you back, though." You admit, watching as Heeseung's gaze locks on yours.

"Yeah? It is?" He questions.

You shrug, "Of course. We practically grew up together; it was weird to not see you all the time."

He sits up now, closing the magazine and tossing it on his nightstand. There's something on his mind that he isn't saying; you can tell from the way his brows knit together and how he's anxiously tugging on his lip piercing. "It was weird to be gone," he mumbles and leaves it at that.

"By the way, I'm sorry about last night." He apologizes.

"For what? Calling me your sister?"

He laughs at this, shaking his head. "I didn't mean to do that on purpose, by the way. That guy was just...so weird, I kinda blurted out the first thing that would've made him feel weird for even thinking that."

Oh. That makes sense. You definitely overreacted.

"I meant," he continues, "I'm sorry if the whole boyfriend assumption thing upset you."

"Oh," you dismissively wave a hand at him, "that was nothing."

Heeseung raises a brow at you, "Are you sure? 'Cause you seemed pretty upset afterward, you were practically running out of my car."

There's no point in lying now, considering you weren't even the slightest bit discrete the previous night.

"If I'm being completely honest, I just felt a little awkward. But that's it, I swear." You assure him, moving to lean against the bedside table.

"Awkward about what?"

God, this was so embarrassing. Is he really going to make you humiliate yourself like this?

"Because I've never actually had a boyfriend before."

Heeseung looks genuinely shocked at your confession, eyes nearly bulging out of his head as he examines yours for any sign of deception. "You don't believe me?"

"I'm not sure. I only assumed you had one just based on how crazy guys were about you in high school. Not to mention you're, like, fucking gorgeous."

What?

"I'm what?" You ask, not entirely sure if you heard him correctly.

He repeats himself again, and you make him do it a few more times until he's too embarrassed to say it again. You somehow manage to get back on the topic of never having a boyfriend before when Heeseung asks you another question. "Have you ever...?"

He doesn't need to finish the sentence. You know what he's asking.

You shake your head.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have asked. It's none of my business." He berates himself, and you assure him it's no big deal and that it shouldn't even be a shocker to him.

After a half hour of talking about whatever comes to mind, you wind up sitting opposite Heeseung on his bed, legs perched up underneath your body as you go back and forth, questioning one another.

"So, when are you gonna admit you had a crush on me?" His voice is barely a whisper.

"I never did." You lie.

"Really? That sucks?"

"Why?"

He shrugs, leaning his back against the headboard. "I just always thought that maybe you and I would've ended up together at some point."

You don't remember who leans in first; it doesn't matter; all that matters is after years of longing, your lips are finally intertwined with his. He must've smoked today; you can taste the nicotine on his breath. But it doesn't matter; you don't make the slightest move to pull away. Neither does he, placing his hands on the small of your back to guide you onto his lap.

Your body is moving on autopilot, limbs moving to do whatever feels right as you silently pray not to ruin the moment. Heeseung can spot your nervousness from a mile away and stop you, "We don't have to do—"

"I want to," you pant, breathless, "I've wanted this for so long."

"Do you trust me?" He asks.

"More than anything."

He kisses you again before adjusting your current position, slowly twisting yourselves until you're lying flat on your back. He moves his lips down towards your neck, leaving a trail of kisses in his path as he settles between your legs.

You reach up to grab a handful of his hair, nearly jumping out of your skin as his delicate fingertips creep up your inner thigh, inching closer and closer until his ghosting over your clothed pussy. "This okay?" He mumbles.

You nod, unable to form a coherent sentence. "Cute," he replies, "you're already so wet." His fingertips stroke your clit through your damp underwear; you don't think to wonder how he managed to get to it so quickly, all thoughts leaving your brain as he makes small circles using his middle and index finger.

"Heeseung…" You moan, pleading for him to do more.

"I know." He assures you, using a single finger to pull your panties to the side, making just enough room for him to slide a finger into your aching cunt. "Am I really your first time?"

You nod again out of fear that a moan would slip from your lips if you even tried to speak. His eyes are locked on yours, studying your expression as he coaxes a finger inside you. You're embarrassed at how quickly your wetness coated his finger, but Heeseung doesn't care. He likes it, makes him feel fucking amazing knowing the effect he had on you.

"Take your shirt off." He says, and you do as told, pulling your top up and off your body and tossing it to the floor; making quick work of undoing your bra before he even has the chance to ask.

His lips are back on your neck instantly, trailing down to your collarbone until he reaches the curve on your breast. He halts his actions momentarily before your pitched nipple is caught between his teeth and your back arching off the bed from how overstimulating everything feels.

You curse under your breath, and Heeseung makes another comment about how cute you are, though you feel far from it. He apologizes by lapping his tongue around your nipple, easing the pain slowly as he inserts a second finger into your cunt.

You can feel his bulge against your thigh, though he doesn't even care about getting himself off. He moves over to your nipple, licking and sucking until it's completely hardened, leaving himself breathless. The two fingers that had been working your cunt had picked up the pace now, and there was an unfamiliar feeling in your gut that you couldn't identify.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck…" You groan, legs trembling.

Heeseung is all too familiar with these actions and asks, "You're already close? I've barely done anything to you." He teases, chuckling to himself.

You know he's being lighthearted, but you can't help but feel embarrassed at the tears forming in your eyes from how good everything feels.

Suddenly, he's pulling his fingers out of you, and now you feel like crying for a different reason. You go to protest but stop to watch as he takes his shirt off. If you weren't sure then, it's obvious now he'd started attending the gym.

He makes quick work of tugging his sweatpants down his legs, tossing them into the abyss before reaching into his bedside table and retrieving a condom. "You're okay?"

You nod.

"Use your words."

“I’m okay, Heeseung.”

"You're still okay with this?"

"Yes."

"You sure?"

Jesus fucking Christ, the saint this man is.

"I'm positive." You assure him.

You move to pull down your skirt and underwear, but Heeseung catches your wrist. "Leave them on," he says. There are so many things going on that you choose not to question.

He pulls off his boxers in the meantime, hardened cock slapping against his abdomen with precum leaking from the tip. Though you had nothing to compare it to, Heeseung was obviously slightly larger than average. You shouldn't be surprised; it's always the guys that you'd least expect.

He tears the condom wrapper with his teeth, retrieving the rubber inside before tossing the remains to his floor. Despite being fully erect, he fists his cock a few times before sliding the condom on.

He crawls over you, left arm at the side of his head, while he uses his dick to nudge your panties to the side. "This still okay?"

"I already told you—fuck!" He cuts you off, the tip of his cock slowly making its way inside you. You feel so stretched out from this alone you don't know how you'd manage to fit all of him into you.

Heeseung must be feeling the same, swearing under his breath and commenting about how tight you feel around him. Second by second, he coaxes himself into your pussy until you feel like you could split right open. "Are you all the way in?"

"No, can't take anymore?" He asks, leaning his head down against your ear.

You're embarrassed to admit he's too big to handle on your first time, but it's the truth. You don't want to overextend yourself just to please him and end up hurting yourself.

"You can move, just…not too much. Please."

Heeseung nods, "Whatever you want, angel."

He pulls his hips back and rocks himself back in, being sure to ask if you're okay with his pace. Once you confirm you feel fine and want him to keep going, he continues his movements; his eager hips snapping against yours and his cock hitting your G-spot with each deep stroke. You feel like you're on cloud nine, hands tangled in his hair as he swallows your moans.

That unfamiliar feeling from earlier returns; you feel it through your entire body this time. A moan of his name escaping your lips lets him know you're close. How he can always sense these things is beyond you; it's not worth overthinking.

"Close?" He asks, and you nod frantically.

Heeseung picks up his speed slightly, careful not to overwhelm you, but just enough to reach your climax, until finally, the bundle of nerves in your abdomen snaps, and your back is arching off the mattress as you come around his cock.

He's only a few seconds behind with his orgasm, erupting in a loud grunt when he finally reaches it. The two of you lay in silence for a moment before Heeseung finally pulls out of you and slides the condom off, tying it in a knot and tossing it into his trash bin.

"Are you okay?" He asks for what feels like the millionth time.

"I'm fine." You respond, and it isn't a lie. Physically, you feel terrific; mentally, it was an entirely different story. "Are you?"

"I'm good, I'm good."

As much as you would love to lay naked with Heeseung in his bed for the rest of the night, you know Chaeryeong will be home anytime soon. "I think I'm gonna go wash up."

He nods, crawling under his covers once you stand from his bed, tugging your skirt to its proper length as you search for your remaining clothing. "Oh, it's um…your shirt, it's over there." Heeseung awkwardly gestures towards a pile of clothing by the end of his bed.

Almost as quickly as you shred yourself of them, you snatch your clothing and bundle them up against your chest.

"Listen, I know right now isn't really ideal, but I meant what I said about liking you, and really think we should talk." He says nervously, barely even able to look at you.

You almost want to laugh at how cute he is; instead, you agree to talk to him about it soon. You're about to head out into the hallway when Heeseung reminds you about your charging phone over by his desk.

You retrieve it and scan the area again, ensuring you haven't left anything else behind. When everything seems clear, you stand upright, but your eyes fall toward the trash bin near his window with the discarded condom. You're embarrassed to even look at it until you realize something seems off. It looks…empty.

Now, you're no sex expert, but imagine that if Heeseung had finished, there'd be something to show for it in the condom. Right?

Did he fake his orgasm? Was this another one of his fucked up mind games you'd been subjected to?

You don't know what to think as you step into the bathroom; your emotions are all over the place, and all you really want to do is go home. But you promised Chaeryeong you'd be here when she returns, so you stay.

The next time a Lee sibling asks if you're okay is twenty minutes later when Chaeryeong finally arrives and asks why your eyes are so watery.

"I'm fine." You respond, and you're lying for the first time that night.

[all-purpose-dish-soap]

hi hello!! i love both your mer aus theyre wonderful omg

could we mayhaps have more of gaz seeing through remora readers shit and being so over it? like (if i remember correctly) he likes annoying the real her out when he feels like shes sunken too deep into the brainless lil fishy thing, but what exactly does he do? now that im actually thinking abt it i lowkey just wanna see them sass each other lmao

-- monstie >:3

pspspsps mer Gaz enjoyers @thoseofmonsters @persephone-kore-law @cod-z

47 / 1.2k

...

You peek out of the water's surface next to Gaz. He's laid out on a smooth, flat rock, sunning. You'd think he's indulging himself, but he does this all the time.

"Gaz?" you pipe up. "Aren't you drying out?"

Gaz peels an eyelid open, squinting in the sunlight as he glances over to you. The motion is lazy in the heat of the day. "Nah."

You glance up at the gulls gliding by overhead. You don't trust them. "Well... aren't you hot?"

"S'pose. Not uncomfortable, though." Gaz closes his eyes again, basking leisurely. He pats the rock next to him, offering the open space. "Sit with me."

"No, thank you."

Gaz cracks a single eye open at that, frowning. "Why not?"

You clutch the edge of the rock with nervous hands and glance over your shoulder. "There are boats over there. Humans."

"So? You like humans.”

"When they're in the water," you mutter. You eye the boats in the distance. They're small, but they're not diving boats. "But not like that."

Gaz rolls onto his side, propping himself up on an elbow to look at you. He doesn't so much as glance in the direction you're looking. "I'm not gonna let anything happen to you if that's what you're worried about."

"Don't they look at you funny? When they see you up here?"

"Maybe." He rolls onto his back again, stretches his arms overhead, arches his back, and lets out a content sigh. Then he laces his fingers behind his head. "Don’t care. I like being out here. They can ogle me as much as they want."

You notice the boats aren't coming too close, either. "They don't try to talk to you?"

"They do." The corners of Gaz’s eyes crinkle. "I ignore them. Most get the message pretty quick and steer clear.” He glances at you. “What's wrong? You're more skittish than usual.”

You grab his hand and tug it. "Come on, we need to go back to the reef now."

Gaz peers down at you over the ridge of his bicep. "Not quite yet." He closes his eyes again. "I’m comfy."

"Please?" You rummage around your brainthoughts trying to come up with a reason. "I need your help with something."

"With what something?"

"With something. And you're the only one who can do it."

"Yeah?"

"And it has to be now."

He smirks at your pitiful efforts to budge him. Your persistence is cute. "And what is this it that I have to do right this instant?"

"It's... taking me to the cliffs where the seabirds nest."

"You know how to get there."

"But Ghost will get mad if I go alone.”

"Then say I took you. He's asleep. He won't know."

You huff. "Gaz, that's lying."

Gaz rolls onto his side again to look down at you. "Oh, tsk, tsk. Poor little thing. Always so honest and forthcoming yourself, aren’t you?"

Heat pinches the hollow of your throat. He's shaming you.

Gaz leans in, his voice low and lazy. "Tell me something, darling. Do you pretend your head is empty because you can’t help yourself, or because you’re afraid not to?"

You sink down into the water until only your eyes peek out. Heat licks all the way down your chest, radiating against the cold water. "You're being mean."

"Am I?" he croons, his lips curled smug. "I don’t like it when you play dumb. Makes me want to be mean."

If you were a bolder creature, you'd call him a brute.

He reaches out and gives your ear a fond flick.  "S’cute when you pout."

"So you're not coming with me?" you mumble.

"Mm, I didn't say that." Gaz glances up at the sky as he pretends to consider your wants. The corners of his mouth tug up into that dimpled smile of his that never quite disappears. "I'll take you there if you lay with me."

You grasp the edge of the rock again, pulling yourself closer again in relief. "You will? By the cliffs?"

"No." He pats his sunning rock again. "Here."

You look down at the salty, ocean-smoothed stone. "But people will see."

"Don’t care." He pats again, more firmly this time. "Come up. Get warm. You're worrying so much it’s wearing me out just watching you.”

You glance over your shoulder again. It's not like you haven't laid out in the sun before. You like to snooze in the sun as much as any mer. But it always seems to attract attention. Human attention. You're not scary-looking to them like Gaz is. You're more like a novelty. A bauble. Something from old sailing stories.

Humans get way too close to you if you give them the opportunity.

Gaz watches you. “You really think I’d let anyone lay a hand on you?”

"No, but..."

Gaz reaches out and gently grips your face, turning you to look at him again. “Now," he says calmly.

You nod at the command. "Okay. Now. Yes." For Gaz. Your fingers flutter over the edge of the rock as you look for a place to pull yourself up. You try to tune out the ambient human noise behind you.

Gaz helps you pull yourself up out of the water, depositing you on the sun-warmed rock next to him. You end up on your side, mirroring him chest-to-chest.

You stare at his collarbone. "Hi."

He slides a warm, rough-skinned palm up under your jaw to tilt your chin. “Hi yourself.”

His sharkshin feels strange when it’s dry. Not bad, but... strange. Still smooth, but grainy with salt. And it's cold up here. Even in the sun, the breeze makes you shiver and duck into Gaz's chest. You still feel so exposed with your bare back to the busy shallows.

“Relax. Fussy thing.” Price’s words. Gaz pulls you against him, one arm curled over you. Then he stretches out on his back, bringing you with him to sprawl over his chest. He drapes his hand over the fin that trails down the base of your spine, rubbing his thumb over the arch of your lower back.

"Better?" he asks, his voice barely above a rumble against your ear.

"I guess so." Not really.

"Don’t pout. No one’s gonna come up to you while I’m here, you know. Only thing snatching you off these rocks is me. That make you feel safe? Cuddling up with the most dangerous thing here?”

You give him a flat look, still feeling your earlier embarrassment. You’d push him off this stupid rock if you could.

His grin widens. "Don't look at me like that. You started this."

"I'm telling Ghost."

"Tattle-tale."

"Hmph." You wriggle over until you slide into the crook of his other arm with your hand on his chest. This way, you can see the humans and their boats over him, but you're mostly hidden from view.

"Sullen little…" Gaz's other arm slides over your back, holding you snugly to him. One big hand comes up to cup the back of your neck, his thumb rubbing in a way that makes your eyelids flutter. His mouth is right next to your ear. "Now will you stop flinching every time a boat passes?"

“Okay."

"Good. Now stay," he orders in a low voice, "and stop wriggling."

...

more mer au / more Gaz / masterlist

[churipu]

hi ! can i request some headcanons of jjk men w a shy sweetheart gf ? any characters will do as long gojo's included, thank you sm !

jjk men & their sweetheart girlfriend

featuring. gojo satoru, sukuna ryomen, choso x fem! reader

warnings. college! au, just sit back and enjoy <;33

note. hii anon, love this request. for instance i always think abt jjk men with the most boisterous personalities having the sweetest partners, ty for requesting, hope you like it <;33

GOJO SATORU. honestly, i can see him taking interest in someone sweet and shy. i feel like he will gush over you a lot, he loves seeing your shy nature — he finds you really, really, really cute. so he can't help but poke teases at you sometimes knowing you can do nothing but to go along with it.

gojo first met you when you helped an abandoned kitten at the back of campus. he was out to find a place to relax and he saw you tending to a ginger colored kitten, feeding it and holding it like it's the most fragile being in the world. from that day on, he settled his interest in you.

he watched you caress the kitten full of love, mumbling out incoherent words and feeding it back to life. and when you left the kitten inside the box you made for it, gojo approached the feline. smiling out, intrigued.

gojo found himself asking people about you. geto, shoko, anyone and every single time he asked, their answers are just too basic, such as "oh, y/n..i know her, she doesn't talk much. seems rather shy, but she's really nice." or a "y/n? she's the nicest person i know". he needed to know more about you (but was forgetting the fact that he was doing nothing to know more about you but ask people), until shoko told him he should just talk to you.

here's the thing. who wouldn't know about a white haired male, with the most alluring blue eyes, is smart, popular, and practically one whole package?

gojo was actually (genuinely) surprised when you recognized him. it was like any other day, you were playing with the same ginger feline and you took notice of him and just went, "gojo, can i help you?"

"you know me?"

you giggled, "who wouldn't?"

i swore he felt like he was on cloud nine. every day gojo and you would meet up in the same place without any compromising— the two of you just decided that the back of your campus was that place. and every single day he gets to meet you, gojo falls in love deeper.

and so one day, he just casually asks you to be his girlfriend while you were playing with the ginger who the both of you named as "butter". and you looked at him with the (possibly) reddest face you could muster out. but accepted him nonetheless.

today, he's still in love as ever. gojo sometimes wondered how someone— a sweetheart— like you accepted to be his girlfriend. he gushes over you like a kid and takes pictures and videos of you doing random things (his phone is your own personal camera). gojo spoils you a lot (he's rich rich) so if he sees something that reminded him of you, just know that he won't think twice before buying it for you.

he's such a lovesick puppy that it's concerning sometimes.

most of the time you'd tell him he doesn't need to do all that, but he insisted and gets pouty if you don't accept the gifts he got for you. he loves his sweetheart girlfriend so much people get jealous of you.

"satoru, this is too much!"

"it's never too much for you, sweetheart."

SUKUNA RYOMEN. sukuna? having a girlfriend? i feel like he's fucking boisterous and annoying when it comes to women. he's probably one of those confident star athlete at campus who always make the team every season, and is never enough with one woman.

until he met you.

sukuna never understood the concept of "love" until he finds himself a mess in front of you, until he finds himself thinking about you in his games, until he gets jealous over people hitting on you, until he finds himself looking for you amidst the crowd, until he finds himself stop trying to hook up with random girls after his games.

please help him, he's so confused with this new feeling that he initially thought he was sick and needed help. he's never really talked to you outside of lectures— sukuna who usually skips out on a lot of lectures, suddenly attended them just so he could talk to you more and get to know you more.

"ya' new here?" obviously not, sukuna just didn't know how to start a conversation with you.

it's not like he hasn't done some research about you yet, he's asked his teammates, and them telling him that you were such a sweetheart that they couldn't even have the heart to hit on you.

"oh. um..no." you tell him, not even engaging in an eye contact.

he finds you really cute, but he of course, wouldn't admit that. so he just tried poking fun at you as a form of comfort (kind of like a love language). it shocked his professors that sukuna began popping in time for lectures and is never missing out on any, when in fact he was just there for you.

most of the time, sukuna and you would talk in lectures. out of there? sukuna would be with his friends most of the time, but it doesn't mean he wasn't looking for you in every turn he goes. and in every games, he would try looking for you to see if you came to support the team (him) or not, and gets really unmotivated when he can't find you.

so one day, he just—

"you should come see me play." he's straightforward alright, and he will do anything to get you to watch him play (he wanted to show off).

and you actually showed up just at the last second of his last season playoffs, and boy oh boy, he destroyed the other team (even his own teammates were surprised). he enjoyed that game most out of every other games, simply because you were there to watch him win. he felt satisfied.

you were the first person he approached after the game. and sukuna just settled that he couldn't wait longer, he just had to make you his that very second. and you accepted.

sukuna who usually messes with woman, settled for you and changed for you. he promised himself he wouldn't be able to forgive himself if he hurts you, he just hated the thought of it (but still won't admit that).

he loves how shy you still get when he grabs your hand out of the blue, caresses your face full of love, plants soft kisses on your face, hell even as simple as complimenting you. but those are the things he love about you— and how you never judged him for anything but saw the best in him when everyone could probably agree with him being the biggest asshole (before he met you).

he's just so lovesick and dedicated to you. and p.s he puts you as his wallpaper, and i feel like he probably has a private twitter or instagram account just to post about you and fangirl over you although he acts like it doesn't bother him. one time you sent him a picture of you smiling with your usual peace sign, he had to step away from his phone for a bit and began air boxing (he saved every pictures you sent him and posts them in his private account with the cheesiest captions and hundred amounts of emoji smashes), he swore it would be the death of him if you find out about his accounts.

even with all that, all he would send as a reply would just be as simple as, "cute."

CHOSO. lord, help this baby— he's clueless to his feelings. and i feel like choso would be very confused about his own feelings that he had to ask yuuji about why he was feeling like that. yuuji is like his own personal relationship helper.

i feel like choso is popular in campus, but he doesn't know he's popular so he just accepts whatever people do and give to him as a sign of friendship. until one day he bumps into you, and you dropped your books, sounds cliche but it actually happened.

and choso helped you by grabbing a few fallen books, handing it to you. when you looked up to thank him properly, choso didn't know what to say or do. he just felt odd. like his heart's beating so fast that he can't help but to clutch on his white colored hoodie.

"thank you.." you bowed your head down in appreciation, and then left just before he could say anything.

choso blinked feverishly and wondered if he had caught the flu, so when he met up with yuuji, he went, "i think i'm sick."

when yuuji asked why, choso explained everything that happened, not forgetting to add a little cherry on top by saying, "i think that girl i bumped into gave me the flu."

yuuji laughs out loudly, almost crying. and choso is just there, wondering if what he said was that funny to yuuji, and to drive him further into his confusion, yuuji told him that it's probably a little crush.

"how can i crush someone i just met?" choso asks.

"it just happens, i guess. like an airport crush, ever heard of em'?" that day began choso's education on love.

for a few weeks, yuuji had to teach him everything about his feelings. and to confirm choso's crush on you, the two of them bumped into you one day (thank the heavens), and choso was quick to your aid when yuuji was the only person to slip and fall, while you were standing well with no harm done.

yuuji then understood about choso's little huge crush on you, even yuuji thought you were such a sweetheart he couldn't help but to gush a little over you— until choso stared at him, brows furrowed in jealousy.

"i don't like her like that, don't worry...i just find her to be such a sweetheart!"

choso was relieved when yuuji said that. then after that began yuuji's plan on trying to get choso and you together— which consisted in silly little and cliche pranks, such as sending a text to you then saying that he got the wrong person. or pressing the call button then saying he pressed it by accident.

you had to be honest, you went along with it, sometimes even holding up the call up to a few seconds just to hear both yuuji and choso talking in the background about how the plan isn't working.

well, they thought wrong. it worked.

yuuji honestly gave up midway and just handed it to choso to do whatever he wants to, so choso just comes up to you one day in front of yuuji too and straight up told you that he likes you. and yuuji has never felt so shocked in his life that everything would have ended if he told choso to do whatever the guy wants to earlier (yuuji thought choso was too pussy to do it).

and you accepted.

it was like a double kill for yuuji that day, but nonetheless he was happy for both you and choso.

still going strong after two years, choso still has the same amount of love and admiration for you (if not, even more). he still thinks you're such a sweetheart and he can't help but to get overprotective of you whenever you both go out. he's so proud of having you by his side, and is probably the type of boyfriend to spoil his girlfriend rotten but doesn't realize he's spoiling her.

"cho, too much." you tell him, a little nervous upon seeing how many plates of dessert he ordered.

"you love desserts," he said the obvious.

"i do, thank you," you didn't have the heart to tell him that it was probably too much for you, which proves how much of a sweetheart you are and you ended up finishing them all with his help, "that was great, maybe not so much in the future?"

choso wondered if he did the wrong thing, but you convinced him that it wasn't.

(spoiler: he still buys you a lot of dessert even after that).

© CHURIPU 2023 , DO NOT COPY OR REPOST ANYWHERE !

[dorotheataylor]

You are in Love

Pairing- Gojo Satoru x fem!Reader

Summary- The three times he realised he loved you, and the one time he said it. Inspired by You are in Love (Taylor’s Version) by Taylor Swift.

Warnings- Its just fluff, a little angst if you squint? SATORU IS WHIPPED (hes so cute😭), best friends to lovers romance, Shoko and Suguru playing cupids, whipped satoru (yes this warning again), swearing (its only one word but still), no curses!au, modern!au, my poor english :p

Word Count- 3.5k words

A/N- Whenever I listen to Taylor, either this guy or his best friend pop up in my head. Like the amount of times I think about them is so insane and I can’t help it anymore. Anyways, here’s another songfic (is this even a surprise atp?) based on another Taylor’s song coz i love that woman so much. Alsoooo it’s my birthday today! And what is better than writing a fic abt your man on your birthday? So I hope y’all enjoy this little birthday gift from me!

The first time Satoru realised he loved you was when you were in college together. It was the last day of the semester before everyone bid farewell to each other and went home for the holiday season. You and him were walking along one pathway coming back from your Christmas shopping, snow falling softly around everyone’s body, and a chill in the air that made everyone want to snuggle up beside the fireplace in their houses.

Suguru and Shoko had joined you both too but then excused themselves to leave you two alone, hoping that the romantic ambiance of the holiday season would finally give Satoru the confidence to tell you how he felt.

To say he was a nervous wreck was an understanding. He had spent the whole afternoon talking to himself in the mirror, practicing what he would say so that he won't stumble on his words and ruin the moment.

He didn't have a problem talking to you as he normally does; you were his best friend after all, like Suguru and Shoko, but once he tries to tell you that you make his heart beat faster, make butterflies flood his stomach, it makes him lose all his senses. Suguru had to drag him out of his room, complaining about waiting for 'thirty fucking minutes' already.

Eventually, he met you and Shoko at the front gate of his house and walked with you towards the mall. The entire day, he felt so jittery, like he couldn’t stay still. You remained oblivious to the fact that Satoru was about ready to burst from the inside from how nervous he was.

Suguru and Shoko, on the other hand, couldn’t contain their laughter. By the time the sky began to fade into the night sky, Suguru and Shoko decided that now was as good of a time than ever and made up an excuse to leave the two of you alone. 

Now here you were, walking beside Satoru, bundled up in your white scarf, and the cutest red blush on the tip of your nose. You readjusted your beanie, looking up at him to start conversation. Satoru felt his words get stuck in his throat, unable to remember how to speak with you staring up at him with the twinkle of oblivion in your eye.

"Toru?" you asked bumping your shoulder with him, noticing his uneasy expressions as you wrapped an arm around yourself to get some warmth as the snow had started to fall little more harshly, "am I that boring that your mind had to drift somewhere else?"

"God no." He blushed, finally able to say something without stumbling. Without thought, he wrapped one of his arm around you, bringing you closer to him. You sighed in content, melting into him and Satoru swore his heart swelled three times its size.

The snow crunched under your boots as you walked up the path. The lights lining the cobblestone street gave a yellow tint to the sight. He walked with you in silence but in his head, he was going over exactly what he wanted to say. This was the perfect time.

The snow falling from the sky, little snowflakes tangled in the strands of your hair. You were pressed up against his chest, so close to him that he could smell your perfume, sweet and addicting. There were no other people around, all too eager to find sanctuary in warmth that their houses brought. It was the perfect time.

He stopped walking, halting you with him. He let you go for a moment, taking a deep breath in and slowly let it out. You watched as the cloud of fog escaped his lips and dispersed into the air. His white hair poked out from under his hoodie, matted on his forehead. Satoru looked down at his wet boots, kicking around snow that pooled around the soles.

Finally, he looked up, taking your two hands into his palms in the process. 

You smiled at the gesture, your heart fluttering in your chest. You looked at him, offering a comforting look as you raised your eyebrows up in suspicion, “What’s up, Toru?”

And just like that, all of the words he worked so hard to conjure up, slipped right out of his mind. When he saw you looking up at him, eyebrows raised, cheeks and nose tinted with a light shade of pink, and your lips plump and red, he realized that there were no words to describe what it was he felt about you.

You watched him in silence, studying the way he gave you a lopsided smile when you tucked a piece of his hair behind his ear. He leaned into your touch, letting out another sigh of relief. 

“Nothing,” he finally spoke, letting go of your hands. He wrapped his arm around you again, hoping you won’t hear the marching of his heart in his chest. “You’re my best friend.”

-

The second time he realised he loved you was when he found you crying on your couch. He had came to check on you when you didn’t come over for the routine movie night. Every Saturday, you, him, Suguru and Shoko got together at each other’s places for movie nights. Laughter, jokes, entertainment, talks, drinks and what not went on full night and the next day all of you were passed out on either couch or the floor.

Today everyone was coming over at Satoru’s place. Suguru and Shoko were already there but when it kept getting late, Satoru became worried about you. Shoko tried assuring him you were okay, just stuck in some work but he wouldn’t believe it. Because you were time punctual and never missed the movie nights.

So he came over to yours and opened your door with the spare key you’d given him only to find you curled up in your couch, crying.

He immediately rushed over to you and wrapped his arms around you tightly as you held onto him. He didn’t say anything but stayed there, holding you, feeling his heart break as you sobbed into his chest.

A few moments later, when he felt you relaxing a little, he took your face in his hands as he asked, “better?”

You just nodded as you snuggled into him. Neither of you two said anything, a comfortable silence, just sitting there on your couch, engulfing each other, enjoying each other’s company.

“Now tell me what happened?” he asked softly when your crying had quieted down, afraid you might break again.

“It’s nothing. I just- its too much. Work, studies, family, everything. I just got too overwhelmed and just couldn’t keep it in anymore. And I had nobody present here for me to tell me that its okay or listen about what I felt.” You said now realising what mess you had made and quite embarrassed that Satoru had to see you this vulnerable. “God this is embarrassing! I’m so sorry.”

“Hey look at me.” He said, cupping your cheeks to make you look at him when you didn’t. “Everyone in this world has a vulnerable side. Everyone on this planet has things which is maybe too much overwhelming for them that they might just break at any point. Just like you did. But don’t ever apologise for this. Because none of it is your fault. Okay? And I’m always here for you. Even if you’re far away, I’ll always be there. You’re not alone, okay?”

You just nodded and gave him the smile he adored so much. And without saying anything else, he wrapped both of his arms around you once again, letting you rest your head on his chest. He kissed your forehead and hummed in content as you snuggled even closer to him if possible.

And as he looked down at the girl in his arms, he realised this is what he wanted for the rest of his life. He loved you. 

-

The third time he realised he loved you was after summer. He hadn’t talked or heard from you since 4 months.

You left without a goodbye or a message to god knows where. He'd tried searching for you but always ended up getting disappointed. Suguru and Shoko missed you too. They had helped him to find you too but to no avail. It was like you’d disappeared into thin air.

Satoru often wondered if you ever thought about him like he did, if you missed him like he did. He knew you were probably out there pursuing your dream career, which you'd always talked about and wanted to do, but a part of him wanted to be there with you. To support and cheer for you at every step you take, to give you advices, to have late night celebration for your achievements. Call him selfish and everything. Everyday that passed, he cursed himself for not telling you how he felt before you left. Would it have made any difference? He’d like to think so. Even if it didn’t, he, at least, wouldn’t have to live every single day thinking: “What if?”

He kept a picture of you in his office. He often looked at it whenever he was free, always wondering how you were doing, if you were okay or not. Suguru and Shoko always found this sight pitful. They had tried to get him to move on, but all of them knew that Satoru was so in love with you and you were special to all three of them and that nobody could ever take your place.

It wasn’t until six months later when you stumbled into the building, chewing nervously on your bottom lip. A part of you knew you didn’t have the right to be there because you left them with no warning. You wouldn’t blame them if they asked you to leave the premises the minute their eyes landed on you. You knew you deserved the cold shoulder. Because if they were the ones who did that to you, you knew you wouldn’t be so forgiving.

The receptionist had told you to wait while she checked if the three of them were free or not. As you waited, you smiled sadly at the memories of last six months. You had gone for higher studies, as your dad had promised, for your dream career. You knew you should’ve at least informed someone before you left but everything happened just so fast that one moment your dad had agreed on your consent and the next moment you were on the plane.

Surely you enjoyed the studies and training period there, Paris being busy in days and nights, but having really nice places to visit. You would always go to the Eiffel tower, watching the sunset, half expecting for Satoru to wrap his arm around your waist but whenever you turned your head you’d always met with empty space. Whenever you came home exhausted, you always expected Satoru to be there with dinner ready and him greeting you with a welcome home kiss.

That’s why you came back. To be in his arms. To be able to kiss him. To be able to call him yours. Because you’d realise that your life was nothing if Gojo Satoru wasn’t in it.

The receptionist told you to go upstairs at floor 5 but as you were about to click the lift button, you heard someone running on the stairs. You turned to look who it was and your eyes locked with a pair of blue ones which were close to home. He just looked at you and slowly stepped towards you as you did the same.

When you were both closer to each other, he brought his hand up, touching your cheeks delicately as if making sure you were real.

Satoru couldn’t believe it. When the receptionist called him and said that someone named Y/N L/N was here to meet him, he left all his works and ran downstairs. And now that he’d seen you, he was mesmerised and shocked. Shocked because you were really here and mesmerised because you looked even more beautiful than before. He touched your cheeks delicately, making sure you were really here and not another one of his hallucinations. And then without another thought he took you into his arms and held you tight and closer to him, now promising himself to never let you go. All the feelings he still had for you, tripled. His heart rumbled in his chest, adrenaline pumping through his veins. Even after all this time, he was still so in love with you.

“No need to tell me where you were. Because I already know.” You were tearing up as you finally felt complete in his arms and realised how much you loved him.

“Don’t ever leave me like that again.” He said as he was starting to tear up too. He loved you so much and the thought of being apart once again was killing him.

“I won’t. Ever again. I promise.”

-

It didn’t take long for Satoru to tell you how he felt after you came back. He couldn’t hold it in any longer. Every moment that he didn’t get to call you his, chipped his heart. Both Shoko and Suguru were growing tired of it, encouraging him to just say it because they were sure you felt the same. He tried to ignore them, not wanting to get his hopes up, but he couldn’t help but think about how amazing it would feel if you told him you loved him back.

You came over to Satoru’s for dinner that night, Suguru insisted that they all missed you too much to go out to a restaurant. After dinner and catching up with everyone, you and Satoru excused yourselves and walked out in the garden. His hands were in his pockets, unable to look at you for more than a few seconds at a time. He’s been practicing what to say to you since years and yet, he still felt unprepared.

You were walking silently beside him, taking in the silence and calmness of the life you’re living now. You no longer had to worry about anything, just the day to day necessities, and your feelings for Satoru. Subconsciously, you intertwined your fingers with his snuggling up to his side for some warmth.

He froze for a moment. This is it, he thought, this is the perfect moment. So before he lost his confidence, he spoke, “Y/N, I have something to tell you.”

“Yes, Toru?” you asked, rubbing your thumb over the top of his hand. “What is it?”

There it was. He missed it. He missed the way you called him ‘Toru’. And now finally hearing it from you made his heart skip many beats.

He held you in your place, stopping in the middle of a field of flowers. The moon illuminated one side of your face, showing off your perfect features. Satoru smiled, reaching over to caress your cheekbone. With tears in his eyes, he said, “I love you.”

You gasped softly, looking up at him, “What?”

“I’m in love with you, Y/N,” Satoru sighed, connecting his forehead with yours. He closed his eyes for a moment, letting out a breathy laugh, “I’ve been in love with you for so long.”

You slowly brought your hand to his face and cupped his cheek as he melted in your touch. "Why didn't you tell me sooner?"

"I was afraid of what you'd say. I didn't want to ruin our friendship and lose you. I just thought that maybe if you didn't love me like that, I'd still have you. Even if it's just as your best friend."

"Then why now?" you asked, you voice getting even quieter. He kissed the palm of your hand as he met your eyes.

"Because after all those years of crushing on you, all those months of not being able to see you or be in your arms, made me realise how much in love I was with you. All those six months, you consumed all of my thoughts, your laughter was all I could hear in my silent nights, your smile was all I could see everywhere I went. And not being able to tell you how much I loved you was killing me." He finished, tears flowing uncontrollably from his eyes.

You didn't know when your eyes started tearing up. All you knew was how much you loved him at this moment. Him confessing all his feelings for you, so vulnerably. It made you realise how much you just wanted to hold him and never let him go.

So you said, "I'm in love with you too, Satoru."

At first he thought his ears were playing tricks on him. You loved him back? His eyes shot open, pulling away from you as he stared at you in disbelief. “Y-you love me?”

"Yes, you idiot." You chuckled through your tears, pulling him closer. Your lips ghosted over his, causing him to shiver. "I've been in love with you for a really long time as well."

"I'm really an idiot, aren't I?" he said, laughing a little.

"Yes, you are. But you're my idiot."

And with that, he kissed you. All those years where he hid his feelings came pouring out in this one kiss. His hands cupped your cheeks, pulling your face closer to his like there was any more space between the two of you to close. Your arms looped around his neck, his one hand snaked down to your waist to steady you while one still remained on your cheek. He kissed you, pouring in all his regrets, mistakes, apprehensions, into his love, no longer wanting to pass up an opportunity to love you for the rest of his life.

And when he pulled back for air, he had the biggest smile on his face. "I'm the luckiest man on this earth." You pecked him again as you gave him your biggest grin.

On your way back home, you could feel it, you could hear it in the silence, you could see it with the lights out in the garden. It lingered between you two, suffocating you but it was the best feeling ever. Gojo Satoru is in love with you. You are in love.

[vampmattsbae]

Coffee Kisses

pairing: grumpy!Luke! Matt x sushine!Lorelai! reader

summary: Every morning you come to your favourite coffee shop, which happens to be owned by your boyfriend, to tell him about everything.

warnings: very fluffy, no smut (yet 😈), established relationship, gilmore girls!au

a/n: this is just a love child of two things I love very much. I'm super excited abt this one hehe

It's another beautiful day in Stars Hollow. The leaves are changing colour and falling from the trees. Pumpkins litter the town, waiting to be bought and carved. You can smell fall in the air as you walk into your favourite coffee shop, which happens to be owned by your boyfriend. The bell jingles as you open the door. Matt hears the sound and looks up to see you walking towards him with a huge smile on your face. He instinctly grabs the coffee pot as you take a seat at the counter.

"What's got you so smiley?" Matt starts in a monotone as he grabs a mug and starts to fill it for you.

You thank him and take a sip of your coffee before answering his question. "Alright, ya know how my microwave literally never worked? Not that I make my own meals that often, but sometimes i just want microwave popcorn or something and I couldn't cus I have a janky microwave but, now I don't!" You ramble on while Matt nods, listening intently to your words.

"Thank god I won't have to come over and try to fix that thing anymore." Matt mumbles.

"Yeah, you could never get it to work and you always fix things. So there was definitely something deeply wrong with that thing." You say before taking a long sip of your coffee.

"So, did you get a new microwave or..?" Matt asks, leaning in as you start to ramble again about how the new microwave is like a literal robot and how the microwaves are going to take over. He's fascinated by how much you can talk but also how good you look doing it.

"Baby you're staring." You cut yourself off with a smirk. Matt's eyes widen once you catch him.

"No, I wasn't" He says firmly, looking in your eyes.

"Ok, whatever you say. I'm sure you weren't even listening to me about-" You're cut off by Matt leaning over the counter to put his lips on yours, shutting you up. He pulls away and shushs you, lightly sighing when he sees your coffee cup is empty. You're left in shock as he walks over to grab the coffee pot once more. The kiss was very brief but it left you wanting more. Matt tries to pour more coffee in your mug but you stop him, lightly pushing the pot away.

"I don't think I need a whole 'nother cup" You whisper, looking up at him with a slight smirk.

"You sure you can't wait till tonight? Look around, this my busiest hour" Matt states, motioning to all the tables filled with customers. It is late morning in a coffee shop, so lots of people are waking up to get their breakfast.

"Ok fine, you win" You smile before grabbing your purse to pay for the coffee.

"Oh, don't worry Y/n, it's on the house" Matt says like it's the most obvious thing ever.

You look up and stop digging in your purse with a small smile. "Matt, you can't do that everytime I come in" You say as you zip up your purse.

"Um, yes I can. Alright, I'll see ya tonight?" He says, leaning over then counter for another kiss.

"Yes you will, I'll meet you here" You says giving him a small peck before hopping off the barstool and walking away. Matt watches you through the window as you walk down the street. his attention theb turns back towards the customers. His waitress, Lane, looks like she's struggling a bit with all the tables so he decides to help her out. He won't admit it but he is very excited for the night ahead.

Tags: @sluts4matt @franticroads @fratbrochrisgf @khalei-20 @stete-ss

[anton-luvr]

reaction to coming home to riize after a long day? p.s. your writing is so good!

# COMING HOME LATE AFTER A LONG DAY ; 7riize.

⚝ bf!riize x gn!reader | fluff & angst | bf au ⚝ note ; aww tysm anon :( i combined this with another ask from another anon abt riize reacting to you coming home late since they were quite similar, so i hope u dont mind! enjoyyyy

# SHOTARO. - the moment you tiredly swing your apartment door open, shotaro's already waiting for you with open arms. he lets you fall into them, neither of you saying a word as he hugs you tightly. he knows the last thing you'd want to do right now is talk, so he carefully leads you to your bedroom and lets you fall asleep in his arms, soft kisses pressed to your cheeks with whispered 'you did so well today' and 'im so proud of you' in your ears while he rubs your back softly.

# EUNSEOK. - he'll absolutely spoil you. the moment you text him 'i'll be home late, having a really tough day :(', he'll prepare everything you like. he gets takeaway sushi from your favorite restaurant, throws your favorite sweater into the dryer to warm it up for you, and starts up your favorite movie on the tv. if you had a tough day because of your lecturer, best believe eunseok will be complaining to the university. he won't allow anyone to hurt you >:(

# SUNGCHAN. - you worried him sick by not replying his messages, so now he's upset. he's about to (affectionately) scold you for being home so late, but he shuts up immediately once he sees the energy drained out of your soul. he instantly asks if you're okay, and lets you cry it out in his arms. treats you like glass afterwards, gently helping you into bed and cuddling you throughout the night while you slept.

# WONBIN. - he feels terrible. he wishes he could help you lessen the stress of studying, but he can't, so all he can do is comfort you. offers to give you a massage, makes you a cup of tea, plays your r&b playlist to unwind, and talks to you about anything that comes to mind to distract you from thinking about your studies and terrible day. by the time you wake up the next morning in his embrace, everything already feels better.

# SEUNGHAN. - he talks it out with you. he wants to understand you better so he can help you in situations like these, and his heart breaks to hear how tired and how bad of a day you had. holds onto your hands softly throughout your rant, humming responses to assure you he's listening while he lets you rest your exhausted body against his.

# SOHEE. - he knows how tired you'll be when you get home, so he prepares everything for you to relax. a hot bath already bubbling with lavender-scented bath salts, your towel and robe warming up in the dryer, and sohee ready to be at your beck and call for anything you need. the bath turns out to be just what you needed, and the night ends with sohee helping you get dressed and settled into bed, arms around each other as you fall asleep.

# ANTON. - not only are you grumbling in anger and exhaustion, so is your stomach. anton listens to your rants while he bustles around the kitchen to make mac and cheese for you, one of the only dishes he's capable of cooking. it's nothing fancy, but the hot and savory food comforts you like a hug, just like the one anton squeezes you in before he carries you into bed for cuddles.

© anton-luvr, 2023.

taglist: @wonbons @mxlly143 @keehobaldboy @shawyle @yenart

[flwoie]

TABLE TENNIS — KIM DONGHYUN

☆ when vandalizing your seat by writing how you’re done with love creates more vandalism by a response the next day in blue sharpie.

STARRING ≻ schoolmate! leehan x gn! reader (guest star : danielle of nwjns) GENRE ≻ romcom small angst hs au heavily inspired by that one scene from ‘para sa hopeless romantic' (PLEASE U GUYS SHOULD WATCH IT, ITS SO GOOD) CONTAINS ≻ vandalism (duh) so many timestamps and im sorry abt it WORD COUNT ≻ 682 (not proofread im sorry i gave up on using grammar checkers)

🗯️ sona's back with the weird ass titles??? dont know a slick about bnd but here i am. hope you’ll like this anon 😊

You're done with love.

This is the fourth time you've gone on a date with some weird guy. They keep getting worse every time. Your first date couldn't stop talking and not letting you say a word, followed by your second one, who didn't want to pay for his food, and your third one, well, he couldn't stop calling you insecure—when you weren't. If your friend sets you up on another one, you might as well just go for the first one.

She shows you Instagram profiles of other boys who find you interesting—from what she's heard by others. You interrupt her and slightly push her phone away from your face.

"Y/N, trust me, they're not going to be as bad as the others!" She urges.

"You said that last time. I'm done, Danielle." You clicked on the top of your pen and started jotting words down on your wooden desk.

'I'M DONE WITH LOVE!'

You pointed out your writing on the table to Danielle, making her roll her eyes.

'Wow, emo. Are you heartbroken?'

Those were the words that were written below yours in blue sharpie when you walked into class the next day. You pulled out a pen and wrote down your response next to theirs.

'Not really. Men just irritate me. Speaking of which, are you a guy?'

Danielle walks in and sits next to you, observing that you're not only writing on your table but also smiling ear to ear.

"What's got you smiling now?"

"Look," you say, tapping on the ink engraved on the table, "someone replied to my vandal." She leans in to read your messages.

"Very modern," she sarcastically remarks. "Who knows, that could be the love of your life."

"You're crazy. What 'love of my life' are you talking about? We don't even know anything about them."

She nudges your arm after she puts her notebooks on her desk. "But, Y/N, admit it. You're excited," she teases.

Leehan eagerly walks into class as it is about to start and quickly sits down in his seat to look at your response. He grins and looks around to see if any of his classmates saw him.

He waited for everyone to leave after his class ended. His friend urges him to leave with him so they'll do their project, but all he replies is that he'll follow along. As his friend left, he popped off the cap of his sharpie and replied to your message.

'Not all men, I'm different from them.'

You looked at the message and started writing your response as you waited for your teacher to start class.

"What if we skipped our next class? So we can see who's answering your messages," Danielle suggests.

"No way. We're going to be absent from our next class just because you're curious about who's answering."

"Nuh uh, it's for love."

From there, your conversations continued, with more of yours and his other friends being invested in this so-called love series.

'So you're a guy. Well, I hope you're different from them.'

'Hah! I'm a good boy :)'

'Really now?'

Danielle grabs your pen right after you finish writing, continuing your message with her writing.

'Really now? Do you have a girlfriend?'

'Nope. I don't think anyone would want to date me. What about you?'

She squeals at his response, lightly pushing you back and forth. "He's single, Y/N, he's single!" You scoff and ignore her antics.

'Me neither. My friend won't stop setting me up on dates.'

Leehan hasn't replied to your message since. He's afraid that this might be his last chance at love. He's been rejected by so many girls, all for the same reason.

He just wasn't good enough.

You thought the conversation ended there. It's been days since you last wrote that, and the ink is starting to fade. Danielle lost hope as well until the end of the week.

'Maybe she can set us up together?'

"Hurry up and ask for his name. I might know him!" she exclaims as you quickly write an answer.

'I'd love that. I'm Y/N.'

'Leehan :)'

masterlist

[smiley-mcdoggington]

LET'S SEE HOW MUCH REVERSE AU I CAN TALK ABT BEFORE MY BREAK ENDS--

Stan n Ford are the same up until highschool, where Ford starts trying to be an individual a bit sooner so Stan takes a fuckton of extracurriculars so he doesn't have to be alone in that house

Stan is in theater, glee, boxing. You know where this is going.

Filbrick finds out and beats the fuckshit out of Stan for being queer, but Stan doesn't stop going because Fuck Him, Stan wants to perform

3 years later, Stan and Ford get called to the office, but Ford is the one in the hallway. Principal says that Stan is a savante and could be a movie star making millions some day. When Caryn asks about Ford he says "Ford will be fine", doesn't care, Ford's future has never been regarded so casually because he's supposed to be bigshot scientist.

Filbrick is suddenly a lot nicer with Stan, and when Ford's grades slip he gets a lot harsher with Ford.

CAME BACK

Stanley's future is centered around an agent at a talent show for which he wants to perform a song and dance number with Carla. It's Beyond the Sea by Bobby Darin. The lyrics haunt Stanford. He doesn't want to be left waiting for Stanley while he sails off on his own, and he certainly doesn't want to see the way Stanley holds Carla's waist when they practice in their shared bedroom.

Ford practiced the number with Stan a few times when Carla couldn't make it but Stan was antsy. He felt like a fool while Stan pulled him through the steps and crooned 'waiting for me' so sweetly in his ear. Ford doesn't want to have to wait for Stan. He never thought he would have to, but now Stan's going places while Ford thought he would always have Stan in his pocket.

Ford was responsible for bringing the record with that damn song on it. But Stan had left early, he hadn't woken Ford up, and Ford slept in. He'd asked, the day before, if he could use the El Diablo to get to school since Stan was riding with Ma in her car. Stan said "Hell, Sixer, if this gig goes off without a hitch, you can keep the car!" Ford sped in the car to the school to hopefully make it in time with the record. When he got there, Stan and Carla were already on stage, Stan's voice carrying the lyrics with no music, him and Carla dancing as if it made no difference. As if Ford's contribution made no difference. Stanley dipped Carla the way that always made him bump Ford's glasses, but it was so smooth with her. Ford left, drove Stanley's car to their boat, and waited for Stan to find him like he always did.

Stan is pissed because Ford was supposed to be there to support him for once. He goes to the boat and demands to know where the hell Ford was. Ford asked if it mattered. Stan said it mattered to him. It was the first thing that really mattered to him. It was the first thing he was good at, that he got recognized for all on his own, and he wanted Ford there to cheer him on like he always cheered on Ford's stupid mathletes competitions and his stupid science fairs and his stupid debate matches. He said he waited for Ford but Ford wasn't there. Ford snaps and says he won't wait for Stan while those damn lyrics circle his head.

Stan says that isn't fair. That Stan's always waiting for Ford. Ford says Stan stopped doing that the second he got a chance to be better than him. Stan said that wasn't fair, either. Stan says he's walking home, he needs to cool off.

Ford isn't back when he gets there. He isn't back the next morning either. He goes back to the boat and both Ford and the Stanleymobile are gone. Ford ran away.

Ford, determined to prove himself more than "just fine", takes shortcuts to get around the colleges he doesn't have the patience or the money for. He does reckless things, gets caught up in making drugs because it's just so easy and it gives him a lab space to work with so long as the product is received on time (plus Speed let's him work for longer without needing to sleep). He sees Stan on TV - that agent loved him, of course they did, and Stan was some bigshot with a ring on his finger and his name in the cast of so many shows and movies on shitty hotel cable that Ford wants to scream.

The first time Ford sees Stan in four years since he ran away, it's from behind bars. Ford had gotten arrested for some pretty scary shit, and he called Stan in a panic. Of course Stan came, and Stan was frustrated but he was so happy Ford reached out even if it was just because he wanted something. Stan pulled a few strings, used his silver tongue and his heavy wallet to convince the small-time cops it was a misunderstanding. In the car Stan said he missed Ford, and Ford said he did too. They spent some quality time in the back of "Ford's" car

Ford won't accept charity, he says he's not a money hungry letch like their parents are (who retired in Florida after Stan made his first decent role in a big box movie), he also refuses college on the principle of the matter because all the college kids he's interacted with acted like they were smarter than him when he Knows he's a genius he just needs to get some more materials - get someone to accept his papers and his patents when he has a record instead of a degree. If he can just Proove his science works then people will stop fucking questioning him (that proof is through wildly unethical means but it doesn't matter if the science works, does it?)

He only sees Stan when he calls Stan to bail him out. He built it up in his head as Stan owing him for ruining his life by taking all the attention for himself and leaving Ford neglected, but that excuse is fickle so be avoids him anytime else to try to not think too hard about it.

He met Fidds in jail because Fidds made a giant murder robot, Stan bailed him out too for being Ford's friend

Stan is starting to get tired of the routine - he has a daughter now, he doesn't want to explain to her why she can't see her uncle Ford because he's wanted in so many states, and he won't see Stan unless he wants his bail paid, his lawyer arranged and his dick wet for an afternoon.

Then Ford meets Bill, and suddenly he swears he'll get clean for Stan, could he please just have a stipend to get a house in some nowhere town so he can gather enough research to make a proper grant request? Stan thinks it's too good to be true, so he says yes on the condition he visits Ford every few weeks to check on him, make sure he's not on anything and that he's not doing anything so illegal he'll get a warrant in Oregon, too. Ford has never been so offended, but he takes the deal for the sake of his Muse.

The first few years are great, Ford is really passionate, even if he's always cagey around Stan because his Muse keeps telling him how Stan's looking for a reason to kick him out, take away the support, leave Ford drowning. Then Fidds is traumatized.

Ford and Bill fall out, Ford starts using again just to stay awake, to keep his body to himself. Bill made him terrified of Stan finding out he screwed up again - because isn't that all he's ever done, from the day he forgot that record when they were 17? Stan's visiting day is rapidly approaching and Ford's house is torn apart trying to keep Bill from hurting him. Ford can't be homeless now, not with everything going on. He can't ruin his relationship with Stan, not when Stan's the only one he has left. In a last ditch effort he sends Stan a postcard that says 'DON'T COME'. Stan never receives it.

The last few times Stan had brought his daughter (3-ish) with him on his visits because Fidds was great with her and Ford was always happy to see her (even if he hated that she was Stan's but not his). He brought her this time, too. He's immediately devistated when he sees how twitchy Ford is. How paranoid and violent. Stan leaves his daughter upstairs when he goes to the basement with Ford.

Ford's terrific plan - asking Stan to take this book and never visit again, drop the financial support if he needs to, just leave and never see Ford again - doesn't go well.

The fight happens - Stan gets burned and throws off his jacket to maybe keep the fibers from burning into his flesh (doesn't work), then gets pushed through the portal. Ford cries into Stan's jacket, goes upstairs to shoot himself but his niece is crying. He forgot she was there.

Ford isn't good with kids, he's even worse with kids that want to see their dad but don't understand when Ford says he's Gone. After a week of watching her cry herself sick he breaks, takes off his glasses, puts on Stan's jacket that still smells like him, and picks her up, telling her he's right here and she's okay in his still perfect Stan impression.

He steals Stan's identity to keep the house - but drops his career entirely. It doesnt matter, Stan made enough in his long and successful career that Ford doesn't need to work a day in his life (well he does but that's Bill-related) he also drops all of Stan's obligations - he never gives his parents financial support because he doesn't think of it (his parents die working minimum wage because they sold the pawn shop), he doesn't give Carla alimony or tell her where her daughter is, he never tells his niece he even has a twin.

Stan gets back by himself after 30 years of being a sexy space pirate and that 'you took my name what did you do to my house' moment in canon becomes "You took my daughter?!" because Ford left no room for Stan to return and his daughter didn't even know she was his, didn't even know he existed.

[crushedsweets]

ej x nurse ann but in a will they won't they flirty friendship kinda way🤭 they are always trying to one up the other when it comes to medical work too so it's like lowkey flirty rivals.. do u see what I'm putting down Sweets?! Long story short I'd let them both operate on me

wait omg i was gonna draw smth for this but its been so long n im tired so i should jsut type.

also it feels so weird to go back to talking abt creeped lore cuz i feel like i have so much information but idk how/if anyone could emember it cuz its been sooo longgggg LOL so if anything is like "??? this isnt canon ???" its cuz my AU is very specific and changed etc etc. CREEPED DISCLAIMER WE ARE SO BACK

OKAY SOOOO. in my au specifically, nurse ann is a fake nurse! she was a red-room sorta cam girl (killed ppl for donos), and used a sexy-nurse-persona to draw in more views!

meanwhile, jack only got a few internships in at hospitals during his masters program before the sacrifice.

i could see jack meeting ann because he's close to Lulu and feels really protective over her. so he'd be guiding lulu back to the hospital one day, holding her hand and being all soft spoken while Lulu goes on her little ghostly rants.

and of course, Ann pops up !!! and she's so beyond horribly annoying!! quickly peering over Lulu's shoulder and being like "hi handsome, youre so tall, whats your name, your voice is so deep" whatever. i think it would embarrass the hell out of jack and he'd just be pretty stiff n awkward. polite, but awkward.

eventually he'd scamper off and ann would tell lulu to "get your little tall friend over here". and maybe it would work, HOWEVER, in my creeped canon, it wouldnt go anywhere beyond jack being like T_T and ann eventually giving up . she wont tim too bad.

HOWEVERRRR, if we diverged from creeped canon(which already diverges from creepypasta canon...) for the sake of ann x EJ...

i think it would be cute if she kept flirting, and he was kinda like Jesus Christ you are beautiful . LMFAOOO. and she picks his brain about college life and just him in general, out of curiosity, while he picks her on....well... being some sort of zombie demon vampire thing.

and she'd love him quietly pulling her apart at the stitches. making quiet little observations and scribbling notes and i think EVENTUALLY, he'd get to the point where he is just being snarky with her. theyll be sassing eachother and bickering and she'll be like "well if you keep talking to me that way im not gonna let you make a single note on me ever again" and he's like "you know that isnt true."

LOL.

WAIT. IM KIND INTO THEM RN WAAAIIIIIITTTTTTT

[pennylime]

been on that world trigger brainrot fr (also a theory below the art) (long post)

I have a whole au living in my brain abt if yuma lives lmao. Maybe I'll sketch or talk abt it if anyone's interested.

Also, a theory I've been keeping to myself for years bcuz it's probably wrong:

Amo is the black trigger assassin. HEAR ME OUT !! I can't be the only one who's thought abt this at least a bit, right????

1. We haven't seen Amo's black trigger yet.

For triggers being so prominent, why haven't we seen Amo's? During Afto's invasion, we could have seen Amo's trigger, but we only got to see the aftermath. We also have no idea how he came into possession of it. We know it's VERY strong and VERY destructive. Kind of like an assassin we've heard of, yes? The assassin tore Yuma apart in a second, but it was only in like, small blasts? for lack of a better term. So the two are different in that aspect, but it's also been years since then, so Amo could have the room to improve.

2. Yuma hasn't met Amo yet.

Yuma has met like, almost everyone? Or has heard or seen them in passing? We've seen most of the squads, and were seeing more in the away missions test right now, and how they fight, their motives, and their skill level. Like, Yuma knows Amo exists, I'm pretty sure Amo knows Yuma exists, and yet they haven't met. Somehow. Seems kinda sus to me.

3. Kind of stupid, but Amo's hair and the assassin's is a little similar lmao.

Self explanatory. They do look different, but there's a three year difference, so yea.

4. We know next to nothing abt Amo.

We know his age, what he looks like, that he's anti-social, and doesn't really know how to reign in his power or that he really cares to. BUT we have no idea who is parents are, or WHERE he came from, or even when he joined border (that I can remember). He could be a neighbor, but he very may well be not.

5. We don't know what the assassin looks like.

We could chalk it to Yuma's memory, having the flashback being from his perspective and only seeing the assassin for a split second, but it also leaves a TON of possibilities of who they can be.

All of these put together COULD be deliberate. There has to be a reason!!! Like, waiting for a big reveal. Amo's mysterious nature really puts him up to be anything. But it really could just be that they haven't met yet because of simple reasons, and Amo is just some normal kid with a black trigger.

Like, this theory popped into my head one day as a what if, and since then, I've been running with it lmao. A lot of it is speculation. But I know that it can fall apart pretty easily, so I won't be surprised if it turns out I'm completely wrong.

But I also won't be surprised if I turn out to be right 😎

I hope I explained it at least somewhat coherently 😭

[nephilimbrute]

ur agents in particular FASCINATE me so so much i love your interpretations of them. could u tell us more about them and their stories? particularly 8, theyre so interesting!!! why do they hate marina? what happened between them and 3? what’s their relationship like with 4? anything you wanna say abt them, i’d love the infodump

omgosh....😇

a few days ago i wrote a thing that like. detailed stuff about major events with 8. i'll paste them here

agent 8 during the entire course of Octo Expansion was extremely shaken up. they couldn't think straight at all, leaving them vulnerable. sanitized cap3 wasn't much different too, she still had some control over herself and she never wanted to fight 8, making the battle between them long and confusing. eventually 8 gave up and walked up to her, ripping the sanitized goop right off her head (which, to cap3, felt like shoving a screwdriver into her eye)

during the inner agent 3 fight, was unconscious, so this was more like a a made-up battle. this 3 (dubbed enigma3) was formed out of cap3's repressed traits of herself and how 8 sees her, rather than being the 3 that 8 saw fight octavio. she's quiet, cold, confusing, and only wants to play mind games with 8. she never really left 8's conscience, but only appears when agent 8 is deathly worried about cap3

after the events of Octo Expansion, 8 absolutely adored marina. they were still a little shy though, so when marina wanted to talk to them they would kind of freak out. marina didn't mind though, and they were able to get to know each other somewhat, with 8 adapting some of marina's traits and behaviors. 8 had nowhere else to go other than sleeping behind crusty sean's food truck and park benches, so pearl let them stay with him and marina for 2 months. after those two months, pearl got in touch with agent 4 via marie (making him fawn all over meeting off the hook) and asked 4 if he could let 8 stay over (since pearl felt like they were watching him in his sleep) and fortunately, 4 said yes

after 8's mind finally clears up they start to question what's wrong with them and feel the weight of overthinking, which sends them spiraling down for the years to come (presumably the effects of tartar messing with their brain). 8 relentlessly questions cap3, rarely leaving her alone, and in turn it affects their relationship with cap3 in a negative way. when asked why they're so curious, 8 goes silent and refuses to answer

(small bit about cap3) cap3 feels like she's at fault for how 8 turned out since they started breaking after OE. she tries to make it up for them but she thinks she's only ruining them. her expectations for herself are set higher and higher, yet nothing she does is good enough. she won't give herself a break, beating herself up over every little detail and being highly critical to the point where she's stuck in a loop of self-destruction and loathing

8 slowly loses their trust in things and those they love, becoming scared and paranoid. it wasn't until side order that this was more prevalent.

in side order (AU), 8 has lost most of their memories, and the moments with the other agents and idols still remain but just barely. 8 is afraid of marina and has a deep dislike for her, but this was due to them not thinking for themself, instead listening to their gut. their brain fog is back more than ever, and whenever they try to walk for prolonged amounts of time they end up stumbling to their knees.

they can no longer tell the difference between reality and fiction. it's all a blur to them. they can feel marina's eyes everywhere. they can barely remember if who or what meant something, anything, to them. though having a deep dislike for marina, they want to be held by her. to be loved like a child. they never ask her of anything, instead just letting it burn into their brain until it breaks them completely. they want attention but they fear they'll be seen as needy and annoying. they want to apologize for everything and be forgiven. 8 doesn't know who is who, they've been copied so much they're just deemed a blank slate to be imprinted on. they watch everything disappear from their hands, unable to do anything about it. from being excited about what's to come in the near future, to being scared about losing the present and wanting to go back to the past

and then here's another little bit about 8 in side order: represents a crumbling mental state, begging for reassurance, desperately trying to hold on to fleeting memories. their trust is lost in everything but they want it all to return to normal, struggling to accept the fact that it never will

then about marina: represents a mother figure somewhat, but even she still fails to live up to that role fully. she distances herself from 8 who is always going after her just to be comforted, yet she denies it for them. she has the same goals as 8, clinging on to the present and never embracing change, but doing so only harms her and others and this behavior continues on and on

+ marina doesn't want to interact with 8 because she sees her younger self in them, she refuses to go back to that era of her life and 8 keeps promising her they'll be what she wanted to be. anything for them to be accepted, to be held in loving arms again. the lack of communication between them makes their relationship even more strained. but clearly marina still cares about 8, they were the only one to be let out of her mind control. she wanted to check on them and make sure they're okay, but what she got in return was someone that hated her

^^ their relationship is basically like this. constantly wanting to communicate with the other but being pushed away, they never fill each other's voids

onto agent 4 and 8... they have a relatively healthy relationship. 4 is 8 (and cap3)'s shoulder to cry on, he always tries his best to help them with whatever. since him and 8 both like off the hook, they'd talk about them non stop. 8 likes to give 4 details about how oth are off-stage since 8 frequently hangs out with them and stuff

4 appears as parallel canon in side order, but instead of other copies of himself, the other robots resemble agent 8 and cap3. they all circle 8 and mock them for forgetting everything about themself and their significant others, much like inner agent 3

nd i don't think i got anything else to say about those 3......that's all^_^ i'm soooo normal i'm normal

[respocked]

I'm thinking about work anyway so fuck it

Star Trek Public Primary School AU 🛸 !

Kirk

-the headmaster!

-went into education because of his own unfortunate childhood

-has an uncanny ability to tell which student has a bad home life

-remembers everyone's name, even if you went to his school 5 years ago for 2 months

-misbehaving teenagers send to his office get some candy and a motivational speech that changes the course of their lifetime

-most days can be found hovering suspiciously outside of spock's classroom

-way better with older students, 12-13 - has absolutely 0 idea what to do with young children

-which is awkward when while waiting for spock outside his classroom he tries to make small talk with them (-so... son... read any good books lately? -i can't read!)

Spock

- teaches early education, 6 to 9 year olds

-greatly overqualified for the position, had a human psychology degree, interspecies child development degree, highly regarded in scientific community

-could be teaching university but prefers to spend his time sitting on carpets with children drawing clouds

-his class is extremely nontraditional - no desks, sitting on the floor, tons of meditation, classes in nature

-does not adhere to the program at all but somehow his classes always score the best on all exams

-turned down a position in a trendy montessori school for a public one

-parents either go out his way for their child to attend his class or request someone else - either from homophobic or xeniphobic reasons

Uhura

-the school's cultural assistant!

-also runs student exchanges with other countries and planets

-speaks every minority language that has representation in the student body

-also a substitute teacher

-she can give a super interesting lessons

-but takes 0 shit from students who won't respect her

-runs an extracurricular activity with spock when she teaches immigrant and refugee students to express their emotions with music

-is the best at pitching a project idea for funding, which is why her office and spock's classrom are the best equipped ones in the school

-spock's bestie, they hang out after work (gay/lesbian solidatity)

-still lives with her parents, they're super close

-wants to date but it's too boring compared to writing another lesson plan

Bones

-the school nurse! & in charge of nutrition

-teenagers are afraid of him

-small children absolutely love him

-takes his daughter to work and lets her draw with crayons on his important papers

-also constantly in spock's classroom, but to complain

-"damnit, spock! give them all the vulcan cuisine you want, but don't send them crying to me after they get an allergic reaction!"

-"meditation? maybe have them meditate on doing some real work for once"

-but when parents with pitchforks come to complain abt spock's methods he defends him like a lion

-he sends them piles after piles of scientific proof of why spock's method are actually the bestest and most efficient

-when kirk thanks him for stepping in he pretends like he doesn't know what he's talking about

Chapel

-teaches sex ed!

-the sweetest teacher ever

-one of those teachers that noone is intimidated by but noone disobeys because noone wants to makes her upset

-uses her Blonde White Straight Pretty Woman priviledge to convince reluctant parents to sign up their kids for sex ed

-goes All Out on halloween tho

-you know she is there, dressed like a witch, running an educational halloween themed activity! paper bats hanging from the ceiling!

-has gluten free and vegan candy in case the winners have a food sensivity!

-has a secret crush on Uhura and Spock both

Chekov

-teaches IT

-burned out miracle kid

-graduated university when he was younger than his current students

-lets students play roblox on the computers

-and teaches them how to torrent

-somehow noone from the faculty knows where he lives

-background check turns up nothing

-"did you know computers were invented in russia?"

-puts 0 effort in but somehow his students love him

-little girls take sneak photos of him to edit in a flower crowns

Scotty

-teaches a woodworking & engineering class and does janitor duties on the side!

-like kirk, absolutely 0 idea on how to treat younger kids

-strict

-has to be, no joking around power tools!

-but you know praise from him hits different

-will tell students he's proud of them when they make theit first little table

-can fix everything

-say "this interactive blackboard is broken!" three times to summon him

-marries to his career, teaching fulfills his paternal calling

Sulu

-teaches biology!

-rule follower

-stressed out about exams 3 years before his students

-not very inventive but everyone wants his class because there is a hamster in the classroom

-classroom full of houseplants

-if you agree to water them when he's away you will receive a 50 page manual on proper misting techniques

-not strict at all but will give a dressing down to a student who is seen treating a living thing badly

-can be bribed with plants

[saiintofawe]

after reading the sun and the star my semi-dormant pjo obsession has risen and is infesting my brain side by side with bsd. so.

bsd percy jackson au: a series of self indulgent hcs

skk is the percabeth of the situation. iconic duo. unstoppable. EVERYBODY has heard about them. literal legends among the demigods baby

dazai is a child of athena, chuuya a child of ares

dazai's team beat chuuya's during capture the flag once and chuuya went aight bet. and kicked dazai's ass during the next capture the flag. his team still lost but at least he got an excuse to fight that annoying know-it-all bandaged and beautiful son of athena

the rest is history

the akutagawa sibilings are children of hades. goth mfs

now imagine them having the same storyline as the di angelo sibilings... now in this au you can see why akutagawa talks like he belongs to another age

gin would consider joining the hunters of artemis, but in the end they end up refusing to not leave their brother alone. plus, being immortal would mean seeing him and all of their loved ones die, and gin has had enough of her loved ones dying

if skk is percabeth, shinskk is solangelo

does atsushi fit the standards for a child of apollo? idk but i can't think of another godly parent for him so be it!

unlike will solace, healing is not atsushi's strongest task but he still spends a lot of time helping in the infirmary

and that's where he meets ryūnosuke

unlike solangelo the initial hostility is NOT one sided. ryū behaves like a bitch? atsushi gets bitchy right back.

cue to atsushi looking extremely pissed while bandaging ryū's arm and them muttering insults at each other

ryūnosuke swears he hates that fucking failed doctor and atsushi would almost believe him if it wasn't for the amount of times ryūnosuke has tried sacrificing himself to save him during their quests

also in this au rashomon is a hellhound like mrs. o'learly. she's a sweet doggo that devours space and souls

or she's one of ryū's cocoa puffs? (does this count as a tsats spoiler taken out of context?)

you know that one scene in tsats where nico kisses the back of will's neck and says "i'm proud of you"? now picture that as atsushi to ryūnosuke. yeah.

also atsushi has plague powers bc i say so

yosano is the real will here: overworked healers who feel extremely guilty for every patient that died under their watch to the point of considering themselves murderers

she runs that infirmary like it's the navy

she's also a hell of a fighter, both with bows and arrows and with her own fists

bff with ranpo, who's the oracle!

they gossip abt apollo (boyfail) and complain abt their respective fundamental but hella hard roles at chb

also besties w/ chuuya

also hear me out on kousano in this au... yosano falls helplessly in love with hunter of artemis!kouyou. kouyou tries to convince herself that she's not falling for that bossy and selfless and brave doctor because she has an oath to keep and she couldn't let love knock at her door again. so everytime the hunters come to chb kouyou keeps yosano company and it's all longing looks and painful yearning. yosano wishes she could convince the redhead to break the oath and stay.

but she won't. i <3 kousano angst

moving onto happier lesbians. gin loves wandering by themselves in the forest or by the lake. people know them as the demigod who just fucks off to take a stroll in the woods and disappear there for an indefinite amount of time

and that's how she meets an awkward, stubborn but lovely dryad: you guessed it, it's higuchi!

gin was having a bad day and kicked a tree because they were just so angry— anger turned to guilt when the tree fucking yelped

gin immediately apologized and higuchi asked them what was bothering them. gin never loved to talk, so they were very surprised by themselves when they started rambling about their problems to a dryad they just accidentally hurt

from that day gin began spending even more time in the forest

sometimes they bring higuchi to camp

it isn't unusual for dryads to wander around camp, but higuchi usually kept on her own before meeting gin

higuchi helps gin to open up about their emotions and lower their walls, gin helps higuchi to make friends and to value and love herself

chuuya's fatal flaw is loyalty, dazai's is pride, ryūnosuke's is holding grudges, atushi's is holding too tight onto the past, gin's is also loyalty, yosano's is guilt

tachihara is a child of hermes. parallels between two regretful traitors el oh el

except that luke fucking sucks while tachihara has my heart

OKAY NOW OPEN YOUR EARS. STORMBRINGER ENJOYERS RISE. RIMLAINE AS SILENA AND CLARISSE..... CAN YOU SEE WHAT IS SEE........

lucy is deffff a child of aphrodite but she's so lovely she doesn't even need to use charmspeak to get what she wants. whatever you say beloved princess

idk why but i can picture her throwing an hairbrush at an ancient titant like rachel... her and rachel are acc pretty similiar imo but i will not elaborate

poe is an athena kid! the biggest loser in cabin 6!

lucy and yosano tease him on his crush on ranpo

ranpo is there like damn. is this guy gonna confess or do i have to tell him we are going to date via prophecy

poe is a surprisingly good archer, the apollo kids are almost jealous

nikolai is an hecate kid. a little trickster. a silly magician. he will steal your nose but like in the literal sense and he might not give it back

his best friend is sigma from the aphrodite cabin. sigma cannot fucking stand him

nikolai is actually the reason why sigma has split colored hair. it used to be fully white but one day nikolai went heyyy girlie look at this new hair trick my sibiling taught me :] and sigma ended up actually loving the look? so they kept it

the dryads love sigma and he spends a lot of time with them. they braid flowers in each other's hair and chill

nikolai on the other hand somehow befriended the arpies

fyodor is a child of nemesis. edgelord

jouno is a child of hermes, the eldest in the cabin

half of the camp wants him, the other half wants him gone

teruko is a child of hebe, the goddess of youth!!!!

she's ones of the oldest campers along with jouno, but she prefers to keep her child form for unknown reasons

also i can see her joining the hunters tbh

that's it for now folks i hope someone appreciates my brainrot xoxo

[mrkis]

the way life goes — bonus(pt.2). (n.jm)

PAIRING: na jaemin x reader GENRE: smut, angst, fluff, college au WORD COUNT: 14.3k

SYNOPSIS: you finally get inside jaemin's mind. flashbacks in jaemin's point of view could change everything.

CHAPTER WARNINGS: this is a bonus flashback chapter featuring unseen content from the original parts. jaemin's thought process can come across as confusing and it will remain confusing, he goes through a lot of up and down moments, heavy mentions of panic attacks and anxiety, emotional and lost jaemin, the return of you know who, explicit content, unprotected sex, daddy kink, choking, light make-outs

[series m.list]

— [𝐅𝐋𝐀𝐒𝐇𝐁𝐀𝐂𝐊 : 𝐒𝐄𝐗 𝐀𝐍𝐃 𝐄𝐌𝐎𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐒]

Jaemin doesn’t know if you know, but he knows you’ve been avoiding him for almost a week. 

You’ve been acting weird since you came back from getting breakfast the other morning, refusing to meet his gaze and even blowing off the promised movie you’d both watch, going straight to bed for a nap with no spoken words. You told him you were tired, that you were too exhausted from sleeping on the sofa and that you just needed your bed, but he didn’t believe that. It was a weak excuse, but he didn’t want to question it, not when he could see you didn’t want to discuss anything further with him. He still followed you though, he even came to nap with you and held you tightly as you slept, just for comfort, just to let you know that he was there for you. 

It irks him a little that you didn’t tell him what was wrong that morning and now with you ignoring him like the plague, he was getting frustrated, maybe even a little annoyed. 

Truthfully, he was starting to get busy with his photography projects, one of his finals coming up soon that desperately needed to be done but he still tried to make time for you. He called you almost every night and, thankfully, you answered a few of them. But it wasn’t enough. It wasn’t a long phone call, lasting around 10-15 minutes, enough time to get the both of you off whenever you called each other horny. 

Other times he just wanted to talk. He wanted to ask about your day, about your assignments, wanting to know what you’re working on and if you’ve eaten already, but it never happened. Either the call would be cut short due to you yawning or the both of you being too sexually frustrated to hold a full conversation.

You both haven't slept with each other in a week and it’s fair to say that he’s a little desperate, but it's pushed aside by the intense curiosity on why you've been ignoring him. He won't admit that to you though. Not right now. He doesn't want to seem pushy in trying to get inside your head.

“Have you decided what you’re going to do for your final project?” He hears Junghoon ask from beside him and Jaemin shrugs his shoulders, not really caring about the final project this moment in time when he’s got his phone in his hands, bringing up your recent texts. Short and straight to the point, different from how you both usually text. His tongue prods his cheek in anger. “Trouble in paradise, huh?”

Jaemin raises his head and turns to look at Junghoon who’s a little too close to him, the deadpan expression on Jaemin’s face is enough for the latter to slowly move back in his chair, giving Jaemin his respected space with a gulp. He holds intense eye contact with Junghoon before bringing his attention back to his phone, thumbs vigorously tapping against the screen to send you a message.

jaemin: can u come over after classes today jaemin: i want to see u jaemin: i need to see u

you: what abt your photography projects you: i thought u will be busy all week too

jaemin: fuck that. jaemin: i want to be busy with you

you: idk jae..

jaemin: come jaemin: i mean it

“So… is there trouble in paradise?”

“You like to invade people's privacy a lot” Jaemin points out, shutting off his phone and shoving it inside his pocket as he side glances at Junghoon who seems a little offended at his jab. “You’re not good at giving people their personal space, are you?”

“I wouldn’t call it that” Junghoon frowns. “I’m just very intrigued and—”

“Nosey?”

Junghoon jumps straight in to attack, “My life is boring, okay? I’m living vicariously through you right now. You are sadly the only thing that’s entertaining in my life and you’re just going to have to deal with it”

Jaemin’s brows raise in amusement, the corner of his lips twitching as he tries to hide his smile and Junghoon huffs, finding defeat in the lack of Jaemin’s answer as he turns back to his computer, lip jutting out into a pout as he scrolls through his photography files.

This time, Jaemin smiles, hand moving over his mouse and watching the cursor glide across the screen. “There’s no trouble. We’ve just been too busy to see each other lately”

The sound of Junghoon’s chair scraping against the floor makes Jaemin chuckle, seeing Junghoon excitedly move closer in the corner of his eye, leaning on his elbow as he, yet again, invades Jaemin’s personal space but he holds back on any comments this time, allowing Junghoon to have his moment.

“Yeah?” Junghoon grins interestedly. “When was the last time you saw each other?”

“The day after Sunwoo and Yeeun’s party”

“That was almost a week ago” Junghoon gapes, his brows furrowing. Jaemin hums with a nod. “That’s tough… I mean, I’m not even with anyone, but if I wasn’t able to see my girlfriend for—“

“We’re not together” Jaemin cuts in and Junghoon blinks in surprise. “We’re just sleeping together”

“What?” Junghoon whisper-shouts, eyes wide as he leans closer to Jaemin. “With the way you guys were acting at the party, it seemed like you were more than ‘just sleeping together’”

“We’re exclusive” Jaemin adds. “Exclusive friends with benefits. That’s all it is”

“Did you become exclusive before or after that threeway kiss between her, Jeno and Miwoo had?” Junghoon teases, wiggling his brows at Jaemin who looks far less than impressed, narrowing his eyes at Junghoon and lips curling into a grimace to which the latter cackles at. “l’m kidding, dude. Relax…  But this ‘exclusive-friends-with-benefits’ must be pretty serious, huh? I mean… when you and Eunbin—“

“You’re getting a little too personal, Junghoon” Jaemin warns, giving Junghoon a look that makes him cower back slightly, instantly throwing up his hands to say he means no harm but Jaemin’s already triggered, no longer wanting to discuss the topic anymore.

“I didn’t mean it like that” Junghoon frowns apologetically. “I’m sorry, man…”

“It’s fine” Jaemin’s answer is short, lips pressing together in a tight line and Junghoon sighs, pushing his chair back into its original spot as he focusses back on his work, allowing himself to accept Jaemin’s blunt answer of ‘fine’. But it wasn’t fine. It never was fine. 

• • •

“Shit” Jaemin curses at himself, as he stares at the smallest of stains on his sweater from the two iced coffees he’s holding on a tray, having spilt some on himself as he tries to open the front door with his hands full. He manages to do it after a few failed attempts, choosing in using his elbow to push down the door handle and kick it open with his foot before using the same one to close it again, readjusting his camera in one hand and making sure the beverages are stable on the tray as he walks through the house.

He goes to head straight upstairs to wait for you but he comes to a halt when he hears your laugh coming from the kitchen. Jaemin didn’t expect you to be here so early and he can’t stop the smile that spreads across his lips from hearing your laugh, heading straight for the sound but stops in the kitchen doorway when he sees you accompanied by Jeno and Jeno holding your hand. 

His face twists in confusion, watching as Jeno squeezes your hand gently with the most reassuring smiles he has ever seen. His brows pull together as wonders on what Jeno’s reassuring you about, but the way you both laugh together as you pull your hand from Jeno’s and he chases it, that’s when Jaemin can’t help but clear his throat to grab the attention in the room.

Jaemin doesn’t take much notice of Jeno looking at him when he’s got you staring at him. His heart flutters slightly as you make eye contact with him, a weird feeling washing over him that almost makes him feel a little bit uncomfortable, but he decides to welcome it with open arms if it means he gets to be with you today. He’s missed you, more than he’d care to ever admit. He wants to talk to you, to finally ask about your day, to finally ask where you’ve been and how you’ve been holding up with your classes… but he wants to do it alone. He doesn’t want Jeno here.

Jeno, being the saint he is, understands the message Jaemin silently gives as he raises from his chair at the kitchen island, shoving his phone into the pocket of his sweatpants as he excuses himself, mumbling about how he was going to see Miwoo and Jaemin could almost kiss him right then and there as a thank you, but his gratitude slowly slips away when Jeno makes eye contact with him before dipping past, a quiet ‘you-need-to-talk’ type of look that leaves Jaemin even more confused than he already was coming in earlier.

It doesn’t take long for Jaemin to ask you to come upstairs to his room, muttering a small thank you as you open the door for him due to his hands being preoccupied and you even close it yourself which he’s thankful for again, carefully putting down his camera on his desk along with the coffee tray and handing one over to you, proudly showing the ‘iced toasted vanilla latte’ sticker thats plastered across the back for you to see.

You take it out of his grasp. “Thank you”

The corner of Jaemin’s lips turn into a frown as he realises you didn’t recognise he’s got you your favourite drink, feeling slightly defeated as his shoulders shrink, grabbing his own coffee with a small mutter of, “You’re welcome”.

It’s quiet between you and Jaemin, too quiet. It makes his head overcrowded with too many thoughts and questions, especially some regarding what was going on between you and Jeno downstairs. Was Jaemin jealous? Not exactly, he’d like to argue. He knows how close you and Jeno are. He knows that the two of you have been friends much longer than you have with any of the others… so it’s obvious you would be close. The threeway kiss he saw you, Jeno and Miwoo participate in at the party was definitely something that’s unable to escape his mind… but he knows you were all drunk. None of you were sober. It was just for fun.

So what exactly is the problem? He’s secretly nosey, for starters. He wants to know what you both were talking about earlier and, even though he doesn’t want to admit to it, he was confused on why Jeno was holding your hand and giving you reassurance… because what would you need reassurance about? It worries Jaemin a lot, he wants to be the one to reassure you. Is there something you’re hiding from him?

“What were you and Jeno talking about before I came in earlier?”

He doesn’t miss the way your eyes widen slightly before relaxing your shoulders. “It’s nothing important… He was just cheering me up, that’s all. My assignments are just getting to my head, they’re stressing me out a little”

Oh. Jaemin frowns at that, a ugly feeling settling in his chest at the thought of you being so stressed and worked up over your assignments, as he reaches his hand down to affectionately caress the back of your head, pushing you forwards carefully to lean down and press a chaste kiss to your forehead. Your frown matches his and he can’t help but feel as though there’s more than what you’re letting on, but he doesn’t want to stress you out anymore, he doesn’t want to see you be caught up in your worries.

“You work too hard, hm?” Jaemin coos in that voice he knows that you hate so much, but it makes you smile and his chest soars when he sees that exact smile creeping onto your face. “You need to chill out… your health is more important than some assignments”

“I know, but—”

“You’re smart and you know exactly what you’re doing” He cuts you off, not allowing you to make up any excuse. His hand resumes in caressing the back of your head, rings getting caught in your hair which you both snicker at, but he goes back into serious mode as he speaks, “Chill out with me today, okay? You can even nap on my bed if you want to… it’s all yours”

“All mine?”

“All yours”

• • •

Despite telling you to chill on his bed, Jaemin couldn’t exactly do that himself due to a photography project he had to work on. He did lay with you for a bit, trying to get you to talk about your day and what you’ve been doing since you’ve been so busy, but the one worded answers and the simple replies got under his skin a little. It seemed like you weren’t interested in having a conversation with him, to which he blamed you being so stressed over your assignments and potentially too tired. He yearned for you to talk to him, to tell him everything that's going on inside of your head and that he could help you… but with the lack of communication, Jaemin gave up.

He sits at his desk, the sound of him clicking his mouse and sighing to himself about mistakes being the only noises that break the silence you’re both stuck in. He glances over his shoulder a few times during his work, seeing you rotate between sipping the last remains of your drink, playing games on your phone and laying against the pillows while staring up at his ceiling mindlessly. Jaemin even looks up at the ceiling, wondering what’s so fascinating about his white ceiling that you can’t even find the words to talk to him. 

It doesn’t take long for Jaemin to crack, pausing his work to swivel around in his chair to face you, the quietness and the lack of talking becoming too much for him to handle. He feels frustrated, horny, annoyed, maybe even a little upset.

“Okay, what’s going on?” He breaks the silence as he stands, abandoning his project as he makes his way over to you on the bed. You still don’t look at him which he sighs at, standing in between your legs that hang off the edge of the bed, his hands touch your thighs, kneading and groping the skin. His gaze turns hard as he looks down at you. “You’ve been weird this past week and there’s no point in trying to deny it either… I know you. What’s been going on?”

“Nothing” You mumble to him distractingly, eyes dazed. “I’m just tired”

“Do you expect me to really believe that?” He quirks his brow, tuting with a shake of his head as his hands grope your thighs harder, thumbs pushing into the flesh. “You think I haven’t noticed you actively avoiding me?”

“W-what?! No, I—” You stutter immediately, struggling to find the right words. He’s got you. So you have been avoiding him on purpose. “Jae, I—”

“I just want to play with you” His voice whines, his bottom lip jutting out into a pout at the thought of you avoiding him all this time. He feels annoyed and a little taken back, but with how horny he’s been feeling and seeing you stare up at him the way you are, he lets his annoyance slip away. You whisper his name, but he hardly pays any attention as he speaks again, “How am I supposed to play with you if you keep avoiding me and hiding from me, hm? That’s not nice… is it, baby?”

“No” You shake your head, your own arousal pooling in your eyes and Jaemin fights the urge to grin at how turned on you are right now.

“Can I play with you now?” He asks and you’re quick to nod your head, just as desperate as he is. “Then open your legs for me, baby”

The way you open your legs to invite him in makes Jaemin grin wickedly, gripping your thighs tight in his grasp as he pulls you down the bed. He grunts softly when the bulge in his shorts presses against you, his teeth digging into his bottom lip when he feels you lift your hips to rub yourself over his covered cock, the grin on his face widening. You’re so desperate for him… it’s cute.

You lean up on your elbows but Jaemin is quick to push your back down as he crawls on top, hovering over you with a tilt of his head. Something stirs inside of him as he sees the expression on your face, eyes wide and needy, mouth parting with small gasps escaping your lips. It’s something he’s felt before when he was with Eunbin, but it was always pushed to the side, something he couldn’t explore further into… but he would be willing to dive further if you were up for it too.

He swats your hand away when you try to touch his face and you obey, resting your hand at your sides despite him feeling the way your hips continue to rub against his. He sighs at your reaction with a tut, running his hand up your body and over your chest, ghosting over your neck.

“Look at you… so desperate” He rasps, tracing his index finger over your throat carefully, watching your reactions for any uncertainty or hesitations. Seeing none, Jaemin’s even more careful when he decides to wrap his hand around your throat, waiting for you to pull away at any moment but you melt into his grasp with a gasp. The corner of his lips twitch excitedly and he adds slight pressure, feeling you gulp beneath his touch.

He forgets for a few moments about the rings on his fingers hurting you and he panics, getting ready to move his hand away and get rid of the rings until he hears you moan. A pathetic sounding high pitched moan that sends his head into a frenzy. His mouth drops open in shock, never having heard that sound come from you before but he regains himself, shutting his mouth as he wants nothing more than to have you make that noise again.

“Baby, I’ll give you everything you want…” Jaemin says as he presses his thumb against the side of your throat, his hips beginning to rut against yours. He hesitates before he says his next words, but he wants to test the waters with you. “There’s no need to be a bratty little bitch”

“Fuck” He hears you moan out and he feels giddy, trying his hardest not to break character to giggle. He watches as your fingers curl around his necklace to drag him down, puckering your lips to press them against Jaemin’s but he’s quick to pull back, to keep a distance between you both.

“Apologise first” He says with a smirk, glancing down at your lips that press together tightly. “Apologise, and I’ll give it to you”

“I’m sorry”

His heart warms at that, fighting the urge to actually smile at your apology. He was hurt with you avoiding him, even though you must’ve had your real reasons that Jaemin will wait for you to feel comfortable enough to tell him, but he was still hurt.

“Sorry what?” Jaemin presses, wanting to go over the line and see if you’d be comfortable enough in delving deep in one of his fantasies. You’re quiet now, which makes Jaemin a little nervous. He doesn’t want to push you too far nor does he want to make you uncomfortable. He briefly remembers a conversation with you, how the two of you should be open with your kinks and fantasies and should at least try anything once.

He can see the cogs turn in your head as you figure out exactly what he wants you to say. You don’t show any disgust or hesitancy. You’re breathings laboured and Jaemin can still feel you gently humping his leg like a bitch in heat. He smiles at that.

“Baby…” He calls out tauntingly, adding extra pressure to the grip he has around your neck and you whine. “Are you going to say it?”

“I’m sorry…” You whimper quietly, your fingers tugging at his necklace again to pull him closer and Jaemin obliges, nodding his head, so eager for you to mutter that word. “Daddy”

Fuck. He’s done for. “That’s my good girl”

• • •

“I’ve got you, I’ve got you” Jaemin mutters in your ears as his arms slip under your body to hold you to his chest securely. He feels terrible when your face screws up in pain from the soreness that spreads through your body and he presses his lips to your temple as he lifts you up from his bed, cooing in your ear at your whining. He’s careful as he carries you into the bathroom, the activities from a few moments before taking a toll on his own body but he pushes it to the side to focus on you.

He’s gentle when he sits you down on the bathroom counter, leaving you for a brief moment to run the water to fill up the bathtub. Jaemin comes back to stand in between your thighs, grabbing the packet of wet wipes from the side and pulling a few sheets out and leaving them on the side for use.

Jaemin cups your face as he gently wipes at the mascara that has smudged around your eyes, face full of concentration as he’s careful not to poke and prod at any sensitive areas or even accidentally jab your eye. He’s seen this done by Jeno multiple times for Miwoo and he’s glad he’s taken some mental notes otherwise he’s sure he would’ve messed up horribly by now. He mutters a quiet apology as he sees you wince when his thigh accidentally knocks against yours, creating too much movement in your legs which you’ve voiced how sore they are.

His hands drop down to your thighs to massage the aches and pains, watching your face intently for any show of discomfort but you’re smiling at him thankfully, head drooping low from tiredness but he makes a noise of disapproval, shaking his own head as he cups your face.

“Can you stay awake a little longer for me?” His voice is quieter than usual and it startles him slightly, feeling that unusual but familiar sinking feeling in his chest, but he ignores it to focus his attention more on you.

“Okay” You simply answer with a murmur, nodding your head. Jaemin whispers a thank you as he presses a soft smooch to your lips, pulling back before he could even allow himself to get carried away in the feeling of your lips. He sees you trying to sway him back in but a nose of protest rumbles from his chest, shaking his head as he silently tells you no. You oblige with a pout but the smile soon comes back when Jaemin gently pushes his forehead against yours.

He moves back to briefly kiss your temple, arms slipping around your body to haul you off of the bathroom counter to help you into the bath, squeezing himself in behind you and resting your back against his chest comfortably.

Jaemin takes his time washing you, his hands light and careful whenever he touches your body, scrubbing you clean with your favourite scented soap that he kept in his bathroom. He coos in your ear when he reaches in between your thighs, cleaning away yours and his cum that sticks to your skin and even when you flinch away in pain, he calms you down, humming softly to distract you from the aches and pains. 

That sinking feeling in his chest gets deeper, his head beginning to swirl with unspeakable thoughts and he finds it a little hard to breathe now, the anxiety that's slowly rising within him getting worse and Jaemin finishes cleaning you up before cleaning himself as quick as possible, soaping up his body and washing it away while trying to keep you awake, wanting you to be in bed to get a good night's sleep.

Jaemin climbs out of the bath first, grabbing a towel to secure around his waist before helping you out, covering your body in the most comfiest of towels and guiding you back into his bedroom. It doesn’t take Jaemin too long to dry your body, even trying his best to tie your hair out of your face, getting frustrated at the little baby hairs that slip out from the hair tie but he leaves it, dressing you in one of his old shirts and allowing you to get comfy under the covers with small comforting pats on your back.

You fall asleep in a matter of seconds which always seems to impress Jaemin, watching your chest rise and fall with slow and steady breaths. He, admittedly, finds you beautiful like this, bare faced and at peace in his bed. His fingers reach up to trace across your delicate features, smoothing over your eyebrows and eyelids, over your nose and across your lips. He turns his hand over to brush his knuckles over your cheek and down your jaw but he retracts when you shift in your sleep and yet again, that sinking feeling. That dark, deep sinking feeling is back again.

Jaemin shuffles back from you and off the bed to grab a fresh pair of boxers out of his drawers, pulling them up his legs and resting low on his hips, breathing in through his nose and out through his mouth, fighting off the heavy weighted thoughts that rest in the back of his mind. He collapses down at the edge of the bed with a huff, blunt nails pinching at his thighs to regain control of himself, trying his hardest to listen to the rain that pelts heavily against his window along with your steady breathing. It works for a little, his hands leaving his thighs to come together, mindlessly fiddling with the rings as he now stares out past his drawn blackout curtains, dark and gloomy grey skies staring back at him.

Something pulls at his chest again and drops low into his stomach, but it’s different this time, because he feels nothing but everything all at once. His body feels so foreign to him and he even slowly glances down at his hands, flexing his fingers to make sure all ten digits are intact and that he’s conscious. You have more or less fingers when you’re lucid dreaming, he reminds himself. He slowly raises his hand and places it on his chest, above his heart. You’re still beating. 

If everything was working normally, why does he feel so shitty? Why does he feel so empty and lost? The sex wasn’t bad, it was the best sex he’s had in awhile and he was thankful you were open to indulge in one of his fantasies. He enjoyed it and most importantly to him, you enjoyed it… so what was wrong with him? Jaemin sighs in frustration, rubbing his face tiredly as he pushes himself off the bed to walk over to his mini fridge beneath his desk to grab a bottle of water, unscrewing the cap and taking a few hefty gulps, the coldness soothing his tight throat.

His eyes look around the room, to his computer, to the polaroid picture, to the bed, to you, to the ring sitting on his bedside table. To that ring. 

He stares at the dainty jewellery for a while longer as he gulps more water, finishing the bottle in seconds before his bare feet drag across the floorboards to his the item in question, carefully picking it up and examining it between his two fingers. His lips form in a straight line. Nothing. There’s absolutely nothing going on inside his head right now. It worries him a lot, knowing that every time he even spared a glance at the ring, there would be images popping up inside his head, past conversations echoing in his ears, dread and hurt filling his stomach.

It makes him sick.

“Jaemin?” He hears you groggily call out his name from beneath his blanket and he hears you shuffle around, undoubtedly looking for him. Your voice brings him comfort and it drags him back to reality, the thoughts that begin to overcrowd his mind disappear as fast as they came. He can breathe again.

“Yeah?”

“What are you doing?” He doesn’t answer at first, instead he swallows thickly and closes his fist around the ring with a shaky breath, reaching down to rip open his bedside drawer and throw the ring inside, slamming it shut with a loud thump that has his ears ringing. Jaemin winces at the noise, hoping he didn’t affect your ears as much as it did his. 

He’s quiet climbing beside you in bed, crawling beneath the covers and resting his head on the pillow, turning to stare straight at you. Despite the only light in the room being the moonlight seeping through the gap in his curtain, he can see the curiosity and wonder pooling in your iris, a question laying on the tip of your tongue that he’s internally begging you not to ask yet. He’s not ready… and he’s worried about that. Will he ever be ready?

Jaemin exhales deeply, feeling the stress lift away from his body as his hand comes down to touch your cheek delicately, tracing over the skin before he messily tucks a strand of hair behind your ears, keeping it out of your face and away from your ears. His fingers come around to play with the ear that dangles prettily from your ears, smiling to himself when he realises you’ve forgotten to take it off before bed.

His eyes dart down to your lips, licking over his own just as he leans forward, caving into his urges of giving you a kiss, a kiss so gentle and soft that it makes Jaemin’s neck feel hot, especially with how your hand cups his face to keep him in place, holding him so carefully in the palm of your hands. It makes Jaemin’s heart melt.

He’s really missed you… and he hopes you missed him too.

— [𝐅𝐋𝐀𝐒𝐇𝐁𝐀𝐂𝐊 : 𝐉𝐄𝐍𝐎]

“Are you alright?” Jeno asks cautiously as he looks up from his phone, watching Jaemin mindlessly swirl the spoon around in his cereal, not paying attention to the milk that spills over the edge. “Jae?”

Jaemin hums, turning his head to Jeno who’s pointing at the mess and Jaemin’s gaze drops down, curses under his breath as he quickly grabs a napkin to wipe away the spillage, throwing the wet paper into the trash with a huff.

Jeno’s brows furrow worryingly, curious to what’s going on inside of Jaemin’s head as he shuts off his phone, leaning his arms on the kitchen table in front of him, giving Jaemin his full attention.

“Dude, what’s going on?”

“Nothing” He immediately answers, but his eyes shut in defeat as he realises that this is Jeno he’s talking to, knowing that he’s not the type to drop the subject so quickly. It’s been a few days since you came over and the feeling he experienced after having sex with you hasn’t fully disappeared, it’s been lingering on his mind ever since and eating him alive, along with the ring that’s locked away in his bedside drawer. “It’s hard to explain”

Jeno gets comfortable in his seat, offering Jaemin a gentle smile. “Try”

“I, uh—” Jaemin’s clears his throat. “I had sex with Y/N the other day, the day you guys were talking in here before I came home, and I… I don’t know, it was pretty intense, I guess. We dove into something for the first time and I think I lost myself for a while, things felt weird—I felt weird… emotionally”

"Postcoital Dysphoria"

Jaemin’s face turns blank, not understanding a word that came out of Jeno’s mouth. “What?”

Jeno chuckles, the corner of his lips twitching upwards in amusement. “It’s postcoital dysphoria. I’ve experienced it a few times with Miwoo when we had sex. It’s just something that sometimes happens when having good, intense sex… It’s normal, dude. You don’t have to worry about it, you’re fine”

“I am?” Jaemin questions and when Jeno laughs at his response, Jaemin’s face drops into another blank expression which has Jeno laughing even harder than before. “Jeno, come on, I’m serious”

“I’m serious too” Jeno grins, “You’re fine. Your mood just drops after using so much emotion and stuff when having sex. Trust me, I’ve been there. I’ve freaked out too wondering if something was wrong with me but it’s normal” Jeno pauses for a moment, the grin dropping from his face as he looks warily over at Jaemin. “Although, If you’re experiencing that a lot then maybe you should talk to—”

“It’s only happened once” Jaemin is quick to add in, watching as Jeno’s shoulders drop in relief. Jaemin purses his lips slightly, feeling his own relief weight off of his body knowing that everything was okay. “Thank you, by the way… for telling me about that”

“No problem” Jeno dismisses with a shake of his hand. “I’ve been there with Miwoo”

“Yeah?” Jaemin’s brow raises slightly, remembering Jeno even admitted to that earlier. “Where is Miwoo anyway? Doesn’t she usually come over earlier on Thursdays?”

Jaemin instantly notices that Jeno’s tongue prods against his cheek in annoyance and Jaemin takes this as a sign to sit down, pushing his bowl of cereal to the side as he looks at Jeno worryingly. The relationship Miwoo and Jeno have has always been complicated, even to Jaemin. They bicker a lot but they always make up at the end of the night. The dents on Jeno’s bedroom wall from his headboard can prove that. They don’t stay angry at each other for too long, and even when Jeno comes to Jaemin for his support and thoughts, he’s never been this annoyed… or upset.

“We’re on a break, for real this time” Jeno mumbles, making Jaemin frown at this new information. “We had this stupid argument on Tuesday after our date, about how I wanted to dye my hair blue for fun and she said no, so we bickered about that… but it turned into something bigger”

Jaemin dares to ask, “How big?”

“Very” Jeno sighs, rubbing his face and running his fingers through his growing mullet sadly. “I’ve been stressed these past few days about college and some other stuff that’s been going on in my head. My professor has been wanting me and my group partner, Jungwoo, to come up with these designs that have been burning me out and… I don’t know, I talked to Miwoo about it and I guess I just wanted some comfort and advice from her, but she just brushed it to the side and tried to sleep with me instead to make me feel better that way… I didn’t want that”

“So it caused an argument between you two?”

“Yeah” Jeno nods, raising his eyes to look at Jaemin with a saddened expression. “I said some things I regret, really regret. I called her selfish and inconsiderate of my feelings… I was angry. I didn’t mean it”

“I mean…” Jaemin exhales deeply, twiddling with his thumbs as he tries to find the right words to say. “As much as that girl tests me, she’s not selfish… sure, she can be a little inconsiderate sometimes, but I know Miwoo well enough to say that she probably wanted to sleep with you during that moment because that’s the only way she knows how to make you feel better”

Jeno’s brows furrow at that, “Ouch?”

“We both know it’s the truth” Jaemin shrugs. “Look, dude, you and Miwoo have been together for longer than I can remember and you’ve always resolved any problems or issues with sleeping together… You don’t talk. You don’t communicate with each other because, let’s face it, fucking is so much easier than talking. But maybe that’s what you need, you know? You need to just… talk”

Jaemin’s voice quietens down as his own words sink in, realising how much he needs to hear this himself. He needs to talk to you. He needs to be honest instead of using sex as a way to escape. He slumps back into his seat, biting down harshly on his inner cheek, anxiously picking at the skin around his fingernails as the words settle. He needs to talk to you.

The thought about opening up sounds scary to him, that uncomfortable feeling settling in the pit of his belly when he realises talking to you about his past will open up mending wounds. He tries to convince himself that maybe opening up to you about his relationship with Eunbin will help him heal… but there’s always that little voice of doubt in the back of his head that tells him it will all go terribly wrong.

“You good over there?” Jeno asks with a slight teasing tone and Jaemin meets his eyes, nodding his head briefly. “You sure?”

“Yeah, yeah, I’m fine” Jaemin gives him a tight lipped smile as his hand reaches into his pocket to retrieve his phone. Jeno watches as Jaemin’s thumbs tap against the screen, pulling up your contact and clicking the call icon, bringing the phone to his ear.

Jaemin’s bottom lip gets caught between his teeth, biting down on the skin nervously as he listens to the phone ring, wondering if you’re even awake or busy but his thoughts are soon answered when the ringing stops and your voice comes through.

“Hello?”

“Get dressed. I’m coming to get you in five minutes” He immediately gets into it, trying to calm his rapidly beating heart, the sound echoing in his ears with each heavy thud.

“What?” Your confusion is clear, it makes him smile a little. “What are you talking about?”

“I want to see you. I’m also thirsty so I’m taking us to get some coffee or something… my treat” His eyes darts towards Jeno who's still watching him with a smile, resting his chin on the palm of his hand. “Just me and you. Get dressed”

“Okay, okay” He hears you laugh. “I’m hanging up”

“See you soon, baby” Jaemin lets out a shaky breath when you hang up, staring down at your contact for a little while before shoving his phone into his pocket. “Stop staring at me”

“Sorry” Jeno grins cheekily. “Just admiring the view”

— [𝐅𝐋𝐀𝐒𝐇𝐁𝐀𝐂𝐊 : 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐓𝐑𝐔𝐓𝐇 𝐀𝐍𝐃 𝐎𝐏𝐄𝐍 𝐖𝐎𝐔𝐍𝐃𝐒]

During the entire trip to the café, Jaemin had completely forgotten about the reason why he called you in the first place, to focus on the peaceful conversation he was having with you and how you practically floated to the counter filled with pastries and cakes once you both walked inside.

He doesn’t blame you, the smell of coffee and baked goods is overwhelming, but he still laughs when he sees your fingers press against the glass cabinet where the desserts were showcased, his own hand raising to the back of your head and cooing at your behaviour to which you simply ignore.

“Welcome to 7 Dream Café” Jisung greets with little to no enthusiasm, clearly tired of having to use the same greeting over and over again whenever someone comes to the counter. “Can I take your order?”

“Do you have to say that every time we come here?” Jaemin asks, eyebrows raising in amusement.

“Sadly” Jisung mutters angrily, adjusting the dark blue pinny around his waist. “Apparently it’s a good look for the company to greet customers with the cafe’s name, makes it look like we’re professionals and all that shit”

“Did they say that or Chenle?”

Jisung pauses, blinks and his lips curl into a grimace. “Chenle”

“He’s probably fucking around with you” You tell him once your attention is brought away from the cakes. “Where is that little gremlin anyways?”

“Out the back teaching the new girl how to decorate the cakes. He nearly dumped a whole bowl of frosting over her head when she fucked up his flower design” Jisung snorts, not bothering to hide is amusement as he wipes the fake tears under his eyes.

“You seem way to happy about that” 

“I’m just glad it’s not me this time” Jisung grins happily as fingers tap against the touchscreen of the cash register at the most expert pace, briefly looking up at Jaemin. “You want your usual, yeah?”

Jaemin hums and nods his head, reaching for his card before tapping it against the glass cabinet. “And throw in two of those little cupcakes that she’s been eyeing up since we got here”

“Gotcha”

“Hey!”

Jaemin shushes you by pressing his finger to your lips, shaking his head with a smile before ordering you to go find a seat while he pays. You comply with slight hesitation and he watches as you head towards a table at the back before Jisung hands over the drinks. He taps his card against the reader before grabbing the drinks and following behind you, setting them down on the table as he sits opposite you.

He thanks Jisung once he comes over with the cakes before scurrying off to serve another customer and Jaemin grabs the fork, twirling it around his fingers as he examines the treat, deciding to cut off a corner piece and holding it out towards you to try first. The smile lingers on his face a little longer when he sees you beam and lean forwards to wrap your lips around the fork for the cake, humming in delight at the taste.

Jaemin brings the fork to his lips to suck off the remaining cream, keeping his eyes on you as he waits for your approval.

“Holy shit” He snickers at that and cuts off his own piece to try, only to widen his eyes in surprise at the taste that hits his tongue. He wasn’t a huge fan of cake, but the red velvet taste that hits his taste buds almost makes him change his mind completely. You grin at him from across the table. “It’s good, right? I’ve never tasted anything more delicious in my life”

“Eh…” Jaemin shrugs his shoulders as he takes in your form, eyes dipping low suggestively before a smirk appears on his lips, his mind overcrowded with the dirtiest thoughts and images. “I’ve tasted better”

• • •

“You know, you never told me about you”

Jaemin raises his head to glance at you across the table, brow lifting in curiosity at your words. “What do you mean?”

“About you… and Eunbin” There it was. The reason why he’s called you here in the first place. A sour taste forms in his mouth at the familiar name, tongue poking at his cheek, irritated at the thoughts and the feelings that come rushing back almost instantly.

His fingers tighten around his cup, the plastic crinkling beneath the force and he places it down before any damage could be done. He can tell you looking at him warily without even taking a peek at you and he breathes heavily through his nose.

“It’s just I’ve heard so much about her, you know? And I’ve heard how people talk about her…” You continue much to Jaemin’s dismay. “She seems really… sweet? I guess? It just makes me wonder what the hell happened between you both”

Jaemin looks up at you this time, fully regretting wanting to talk to you as he feels his stomach twist and churn uncomfortably. “Y/N—”

“Look, I’m sorry for bringing it up. Everyone knows her apart from me and It’s frustrating because I told you everything about me and my past relationship with Eric… I guess I kinda been hoping that you’d open up at some point and tell me about yours too, but you never did”

Just tell her. That voice speaks in the back of his head. He knows a great part of him wants to lay it all out on the table, to explain his relationship with Eunbin and how the breakup made him feel. But there’s another side of him that’s desperate to keep him quiet, to not let you in on his deepest thoughts and feelings, to not let you know how broken Eunbin had truly made him. 

Yet, you make him comfortable. He’s been sharing parts of him with you that he hasn’t shared in a long time. He relaxes around you, allows his body to melt into the comfort of your arms or even your presence. But still, the thought of telling you about Eunbin makes his heart feel as though it’s twisting uncomfortably in his chest and that his stomach is being repeatedly punched. 

Maybe he should just rip the bandaid off. Like he told Jeno, talking is important. People need to talk no matter how difficult of a conversation it could be… communication is key.

His teeth gnaw nervously at his bottom lip, sweaty palms rubbing against his thighs as he exhales deeply, leaning back in the chair as his head slowly begins to nod, folding his hands in his lap to prevent himself from shaking, “Okay. I’ll tell you about her”

You meet his eyes across the table in shock, “You will?”

“Eunbin and I were together for two years” He jumps straight into it before he allows himself to back out at the last second, fingernails digging into the back of his hands as you lean forwards to listen intently. “She worked part-time in this art store downtown so we would bump into each other every now and then when I needed to buy a new camera or a new scrapbook to put my photos in… I found her breathtaking. She was beautiful to look at and I plucked up the courage to ask her to be a model for one of my photography projects, and she said she would agree only if I allowed her to draw me for one of her art projects… so, we made a deal”

The way you’re smiling makes him feel sick, but he couldn’t stop himself from talking, the words pouring out.

“She was… god, she was like a breath of fresh air, you know? She never cared about what other people thought of her, she was just living her life to the fullest with no worries or regrets. She was constantly happy and I think that’s what made her so attractive and kinda perfect to me…” 

This is where Jaemin pauses, throat becoming dry and eyes beginning to sting as he realises what he’s about to say next. His heart thumps, his stomach churns and he’s afraid he’s about to have a panic attack, but he swallows everything down as he sees you looking at him with concern and he breathes steadily through his nose.

“Eunbin, she, uh… she got accepted into this art school that she desperately wanted to get in and worked hard for. She would continuously be all up day and night creating different art pieces to send off. I was happy for her, you know, her art is fucking gorgeous” Jaemin can’t help but praise, a faint smile spread across his lips as he remembers how proud he was. She is a really good artist. He rubs the sleeve of his shirt across his nose when he begins to sniffle, trying his best to contain his emotions that are daring to slip. “But the art school… The art school wasn’t here. which I didn’t realise at first. It was in New York. It was in fucking New York and she took it without any hesitations, not caring about anything else even though we talked about it. She said that the art school was the most important and meaningful thing to her, and that nothing else mattered… and she just, she—”

He hears you sigh, “Eunbin left you”

“Yeah, she left me” Jaemin drops his gaze to the table, refusing to look at you as his eyes gloss over. “I was proud of her, I always was. I admired her for working towards her dream and doing whatever she had to do to get to that dream… but I didn’t think she would leave me so easily for it, you know? She slept with me, I woke up and she was gone. Her and her stuff. Gone”

“Jaemin…” You say his name softly. “I’m so sorry”

He didn’t answer you, he couldn’t, too wrapped up in his own head as the images of him waking up alone in a cold bed flashes through his mind, all of Eunbin’s belongings gone apart from the ring she had left for him on the bedside table with a note: ‘𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘰 𝘳𝘦𝘮𝘦𝘮𝘣𝘦𝘳 𝘮𝘦 𝘣𝘺 — 𝘦’. He had crumpled up the note and threw it in the trash, and didn't even touch the ring for months.

He hated her, all of his sadness and betrayal turning to anger and hatred, blocking her number and deleting all photos he had of her, ripping the ones he printed from his camera. He turned into a lost cause, using alcohol and drugs to cope, even tried sleeping with other women to get his mind off of her but it never worked, he was still picturing her face and hearing her name. Jaemin would’ve been stuck in his rut if it wasn’t for Jeno who pulled him out of it before it got even worse, sticking by his side and making sure that he was okay. 

He’s forever grateful to Jeno. He appreciates Jeno deeply.

The sound of a chair scraping against the floor and your body heat engulfing Jaemin is enough to bring him out of his head, his own arms winding around your waist, head burying in the crevice of your neck as he melts into your embrace, allowing you to comfort him with soothing strokes on the back of his head. 

He holds you tight, fingers gripping your shirt in fear that you’d suddenly disappear from him too after opening up to you about Eunbin, but he feels you reassure him when you squeeze him back. You’re not going anywhere, he reminds himself, trying to steady his erratic heartbeat. You’re not leaving. 

— [𝐅𝐋𝐀𝐒𝐇𝐁𝐀𝐂𝐊 : 𝐁𝐑𝐎𝐒 𝐁𝐄𝐅𝐎𝐑𝐄… 𝐀𝐍𝐘𝐎𝐍𝐄 𝐄𝐋𝐒𝐄]

“Are you sure you don’t want to come inside?” You ask him softly as he reaches your apartment building, your hand gently tugging on his to try and coax him in. “You came all this way…”

“I just wanted to walk you home” Jaemin speaks quietly, giving you a tight lipped smile as your eyes meet his. Truthfully, he didn’t want to come inside. He didn’t want to be around anyone. He wanted to be alone at home in his room after the day he’s had, feeling drained from the conversation prior. 

Jaemin wasn’t ready to have any more conversations or even discussions about anything, he just wanted to rest even though he knew deep down that if he walked with you into your apartment, you would allow him to rest in your bed for as long as he needed… but he didn’t want that, not right now. He needed to be home. 

He sees how reluctant you are to let him leave but you respect his wishes with a quick nod of your head before wrapping him up in your arms. He exhales deeply as he hugs you back, relaxing at the way your fingers massage the middle of his spine but pulls away before he allows himself to get too comfortable, ducking his head low to leave a simple kiss on your lips before turning on his heel, desperate to make his way back home without any other word.

Walking into the empty house is a lot worse than Jaemin anticipated, the silence making him feel uncomfortable to the point he had to turn on his computer to play music in the background so the silence wouldn’t be too much for him. 

He didn’t know where the others were, but he was thankful to not have them around so he didn’t have to talk anymore, allowing himself to sit on the edge of the bed with his head in his hands, trying his hardest to focus on the music and not let any thoughts of Eunbin enter his mind.

A part of him was thankful he opened up to you, to let you know what was going on inside his head, how bad the breakup had affected him and his mental health, but the other part of him hated himself for reopening up healing wounds, a fear that maybe he was never going to physically recover from the heartbreak and memories. 

The waterworks start before Jaemin can even register what's happening, cheeks wet with salty tears and nose blocked. He’s unable to regulate his breathing, the heel of his palm rubbing vigorously against his chest as he tries to breathe steadily through his nose and out through his mouth but fails due to the choked sobs that leave his lips. 

His other hand that rests on top of his head fists his hair at the roots and tugs, the pain that soars through his skull bringing him back to his senses and the tears stop, the heavy weight on his chest and the tightness of his throat withering away into nothing. He can finally breathe again and he drops both hands to his lap, staring emotionlessly at the floor as he takes big deep breaths of air, allowing the oxygen to settle in his lungs.

He sits alone for quite some time, not bothering to move a muscle as his mind empties, numbing himself out completely, but his head perks up slightly when he hears the front door open and slam shut, heaving footsteps bounding up the staircase, loud enough to be heard over the music. Jaemin cranes his neck over his shoulder just in time to see his bedroom swing open to reveal a panicked and worried looking Jeno standing in the doorway, bangs sweatily sticking to his forehead, chest heaving rapidly.

Jaemin’s brows pull together in confusion when he sees Jeno’s shoulders drop in relief at the sight of him, stepping inside the bedroom and closing the door behind himself with a sigh.

“What was that about?” Jaemin asks in slight amusement, rubbing the sleeve of his shirt against his nose with a quick sniffle, hoping the redness of his eyes has faded away.

“She told me everything, about how you two talked about—” Jeno pants too heavily to continue, waving his hands around comically before plopping himself down beside Jaemin on the bed, elbows resting on his knees as he tries to catch his breath. Jeno makes zero sense to Jaemin right now and he cocks his head to the side, trying to figure out what the hell Jeno was talking about until it slowly sinks in. You must’ve told Jeno what happened. You must’ve told Jeno that he opened up about Eunbin and Jeno got worried.

Jaemin swallows thickly, unable to look at Jeno. “I’m fi—”

“You don’t have to lie to me” Jeno cuts him off almost immediately, raising his head to stare at him with a hard look. “Don’t lie to me”

Jaemin blinks, cheeks flushed, “I will be fine”

Jeno doesn’t seem convinced but he slowly nods his head in understanding, placing a comforting hand on Jaemin’s back and Jaemin reels away from the touch before allowing himself to relax, letting Jeno be the comfort that he needs.

It doesn’t take long for the tears to start swelling in Jaemin’s eyes once again and a frustrated groan leaves his lips, tilting his head back to try and suck the tears back in but his miserable attempts fail him.

Jeno smiles sadly as he cups the back of Jaemin’s neck to drag him into his tight embrace, one hand patting the back of his head soothingly while the other wraps around his middle. He waits for Jaemin to fight back, to rip himself out of his arms and say how he doesn’t need to be comforted like this, knowing how uncomfortable he gets sometimes with too much physical contact. But Jeno’s surprised when he feels Jaemin’s body slump forward in his hold, fingers gripping the back of Jeno’s hoodie as his shoulders shake with quiet sobs.

— [𝐅𝐋𝐀𝐒𝐇𝐁𝐀𝐂𝐊 : 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐑𝐄𝐓𝐔𝐑𝐍]

It was the morning after Jaemin’s breakdown and to be honest, he struggles to look Jeno in his eyes after crying in his arms for about an hour straight. He feels awkward, maybe even a little embarrassed even though Jeno is the only person that has seen all sides to Jaemin and is always quick to reassure him that everything is fine, and that it’s normal to be comforted when things go wrong or even when he’s upset.

“Are you seriously not going to look me in my eyes right now?” Jeno teases as the pair stand next to each other in the bathroom. Jaemin brushes his teeth quietly, keeping his eyes glued on his reflection in the mirror, trying not to feel hot under Jeno’s gaze. “I’ve seen you ass naked multiple times and you’ve acted fine, yet you can’t look at me after you’ve cried?”

“Shut up” Jaemin grumbles between a mouthful of toothpaste, unable to fight off the grin that creeps onto his face when Jeno bumps his shoulder with his. “Stop it”

“Okay” Jeno snorts as he puts down his own toothbrush, wiping the remaining paste away with a towel before grabbing the can of deodorant from the counter. “Me, Yangyang and Donghyuck got an early class today but we both finish around 10. We’re thinking of getting some breakfast later with the others if you want to join”

“Maybe” Jaemin hums.

“Can you hurry the fuck up?!” Donghyuck yells as he bursts through the bathroom door in an oversized puffer jacket and a knitted beanie on top of his head. “I got Mark blowing up my phone asking why me and Yangyang are taking so long—that Canadian fuck has his notes written on my laptop and he’s not shutting up about it!”

“Why did you let him use your laptop?” Jeno questions.

Donghyuck blinks, “I smashed his on accident”

“It wasn’t an accident” Yangyang corrects as he peers over Donghyuck’s shoulders, lips spreading into a grin. “Donghyuck got bratty when he wasn’t getting attention”

“It’s Mark’s fault!!” Donghyuck argues back angrily, huffing as Jeno pushes against his chest to usher him out of the bathroom, bidding Jaemin a quick goodbye as the trio leaves for the morning. 

Jaemin’s left alone once again, not really knowing where Shotaro and Renjun disappeared early hours this morning but he wasn’t complaining, he had the whole morning to himself before he potentially had to meet up with the others if he wanted to go for breakfast. He wasn’t certain if he even wanted to go, he didn’t really feel hungry and he wasn’t exactly up for any company, but the second his phone pinged with your name flashing across the screen from an upcoming message, he was eager to see what you needed.

you: hey you: i don't have classes today :) you: do you wanna do smth with me

His eyes widen slightly, not even thinking twice as he glides out of the bathroom into his bedroom, leaving his phone open on his desk while he rummages through his closet to find something warm to wear. I won’t answer, He thinks to himself, I won’t answer but I’ll show up at your door as a surprise. 

He pulls out a clean hoodie from its clothing hanger, letting the plastic drop to the ground as he shoves his arms through the sleeves and the hoodie over his head, running his fingers through his hair to style it out before looking for some matching sweatpants. Jaemin’s almost out of breath at how fast he’s rushing around his bedroom, glancing at his phone to check the time as he yanks his sweatpants up his legs, tying the string securely with a grin.

He knows you’re probably wondering why he’s read the message but hasn’t replied yet, already getting giddy at the mere thought of surprising you at your home. Maybe he should get some coffee along the way for you both.

Just as Jaemin yanks open his drawers to find a clean pair of socks, his back straightens almost immediately as he hears a knock at the front door, finding it extremely unusual for someone to be at the house this early in the morning. He begins to wonder if maybe someone had the wrong house, or if one of Yangyang’s hookups had forgotten something during their last encounter, or maybe it was you that decided to show up since he didn’t message back.

His heart warms at the thought and he’s unable to stop the grin that creeps on his lips as he exits his bedroom, jogging down the stairs with his hands smoothing out the wrinkles on his hoodie, fingers ruffling his hair to look somewhat presentable as he nears towards the front door.

He wonders if you’re going to give him an earful for leaving your text on read, or if you’re just going to stand there with an unamused expression on your face like you had done in the past. Jaemin snickers at the memory, curling his fingers around the door handle to pull it open, eager to hear what you’d have to say, but he freezes halfway.

Jaemin feels his heart drop in the pit of his stomach, a high pitched noise filling his ears as he takes a staggered step back, his hand that’s still locked around the door handle turns white from his iron grip. His heart thuds erratically in his chest, breathing laboured as he struggles to consume oxygen, vision slightly blurred so that it helps him no longer look at the face of the girl that’s appeared in front of him. 

He feels so dizzy that he’s thankful for the hold he has on the door, knowing that if nothing supported him he would’ve collapsed to the ground in a full blown panic.

Maybe it was all in his head, maybe the conversation of opening up yesterday made him crazy. This wasn’t real. It couldn’t have been real. She wasn’t really here, she can’t be—

“Hey Jaemin” Eunbin greets him with the kindest of smiles and her voice was enough to set him off. She lets herself into the house without any problem, wrapping her arms around Jaemin’s middle and squeezing tightly, a giggle fleeting past her lips despite him tensing up beneath her sudden embrace. 

He doesn’t hug back, he can’t even move his arms. He can’t fucking register what the fuck is going on. It doesn���t feel real, none of this feels real but he knows that he isn’t fortunate enough for this to be a dream, to be a hallucination. 

Eunbin pulls back from the one-sided hug to stare up at Jaemin who is now looking down at her, eyes wide. She looks different than what Jaemin remembers. Her hair has grown longer and she’s cut her bangs in, completely barefaced. She’s dressed in a white sleeved shirt with a green knitted vest over the top, paired with baggy denim jeans and her shoes that Jaemin remembers all too well. The blue butterflies and green aliens that she painted on her white sneakers in his room stares back at him. 

“Are we going to stand here all day?” Eunbin teases him as she toes off her sneakers, leaving them at the front door as she slips inside fully, shaking the bag in her hand gently as she turns to him. “I bought breakfast bagels and coffee. There’s enough for everyone”

“They’re not here” Jaemin finds his voice, but it's quiet and hardly audible to the point that Eunbin couldn’t hear him as she finds her way into the kitchen. Jaemin closes the door almost robotically and follows behind, lingering in the doorway as he watches Eunbin place the breakfast bagels and coffee on top of the kitchen island. He coughs to clear his throat, trying to force himself to speak louder. “What… what are you—”

“I flew in early hours this morning, if you’re wondering” Eunbin answers the question that’s been sitting at the end of his tongue. “I got some breakfast and I came straight here, to see you”

Jaemin swallows thickly, “To see me?” 

Eunbin seems confused, but she still smiles softly. “Of course… I missed y—”

“You shouldn’t be here” Jaemin cuts her off almost immediately, shaking his head. “You shouldn’t be here. I’m not—You’re supposed to—” Jaemin’s eyes snap to Eunbin’s face as he decides to lie through his teeth. “I have someone coming over. I have plans”

“Oh” Eunbin blinks, feeling slightly awkward as she taps her nails on the styrofoam cup that holds her coffee. She seems curious, “Who?”

“Y/N” He speaks your name before he can even think.

“The girl from your Instagram?” A smile spreads across Eunbin’s lips. “She’s Eric’s girlfriend, right? Or ex-girlfriend, I think? She’s the one that used to come around a lot with him to see Jeno. I didn’t know you guys became so close—”

“Excuse me” Jaemin doesn’t even give her time to respond as he’s already turning away from the kitchen door frame, heading up the stairs to his bedroom and closing the door behind himself quietly. His forehead thuds against the cold wood and he takes long, slow deep breaths, trying to calm down his nerves that are unbelievably heightened.

Fingernails dig into his palms as he tries to ground himself when breathing gets harder to control, vision disfigured as tears form across his waterline. His chest grows tight and the pain that soars is enough to have the tears rolling down his cheeks, throwing his hand over his mouth to cover the cries that escape.

He can’t believe that this is happening, that Eunbin is sitting downstairs in the kitchen acting nonchalant, acting as if nothing ever happened during their last encounter. She should be in New York. Why did she come home? He inhales and exhales deeply, hastily rubbing his hands across his face to get rid of the tears as he turns on his heel, spotting his phone sitting open on his desk.

Jaemin curses beneath his breath as he rushes over to his phone, seeing the amount of messages you’ve left behind and he feels silly when he realises he’s left you completely on read throughout the entire series of texts. He wants to apologise and he types out his sorry message before deleting it, unsure of how to approach this situation and his mind wanders to Eunbin downstairs, his heart rapidly beating again. 

He needs to be gone from this house, gone from Eunbin’s presence. Maybe if he asks you to come over and you knock at his door, he can tell Eunbin that you’re here and that he needs to leave. He lied to Eunbin earlier about you coming over, so she’ll believe it when she hears the knock at the door and Jaemin can rush downstairs to open it and quickly leave so he no longer has to be around Eunbin, and he can finally be with you. 

jaemin: come here jaemin: the house jaemin: please

Jaemin presses send quickly, teeth gnawing on his bottom lip as the little read notification appears at the bottom of his texts and his shoulders relax slightly, hoping that you didn’t leave him on read after his stupid mistakes and were on your way over. Please.

• • •

Hiding away inside his room isn’t one of his best ideas, perhaps it is one of his pathetic ones but still, he wasn’t ready to leave his room and face the girl that is sitting in his kitchen. She called for him a few times, asking if he was okay but he dismissed it by saying he was looking for something and immediately declined when she offered to help. 

Jaemin doesn’t want Eunbin here, he knows that much. He doesn’t want her to be anywhere near him after what happened during their last encounter, it baffles him at how nonchalant she’s acting about it. His brows pull together in deep thought, wondering if Eunbin had a different outcome of that night in her own mind. Is he curious? Possibly. Does he want to actually talk to her about it? No.

He knew this day would come, where she would come back home from New York and he’d see her face every now and again on the streets or in certain places, but he didn’t expect it to be this soon and he most definitely didn’t expect her to show up at his front door looking happy as ever, maybe even a little excited too. 

It confuses him, and he hates it.

Although relief floods his system when he hears the front door open and close, wondering if Eunbin got tired of waiting or even realised what Jaemin’s true intentions were and left, and hopefully for good. He slides off his bed, gravitating towards the window and sneakily peeking through the curtains to see if Eunbin was leaving down the driveway but his stomach twists when he sees the white car parked out front with nobody occupying the drivers seat. Eunbin is still here, he frowns deeply, but why did the front door open?

Deciding to investigate, Jaemin quietly opens his bedroom door to leave the comfort of his room, silently walking across the landing to the stairs where he carefully climbs down, not making hardly any noises as he tries to listen in on the conversation that seems to be happening in the kitchen. His brows pull together as he moves faster and his heart thumps in his ears as he begins to recognise the voice that’s replying to Eunbin, body tensing as he stands in the doorway to see you sitting at the kitchen island with Eunbin.

You weren't supposed to come inside, but yet he couldn’t blame you for doing so. You are used to walking in and making yourself home, the boys have all told you (Haru and Miwoo) to do so. It’s normal for you, it’s normal for him… but fuck he wish that wasn’t the norm, not today. He didn’t want Eunbin talking to you, he didn’t want Eunbin anywhere near you. For a reason, Jaemin is unsure why, but he hates seeing Eunbin engaging in conversation with you which is why he decides to make his presence known.

“Hey”

Your head immediately snaps in his direction and with your eyes finally locked on his, Jaemin feels the worries inside his head begin to disintegrate, the weight on his shoulders slowly lifting. He’ll constantly be in awe at how simple you make him feel at ease, but his figure tenses up when Eunbin’s attention is now brought to him too.

But he keeps his eyes on you. You are the only person in this room that matters to him right now, the only person in this room he can look at without falling apart and he drags himself over to you, fingers itching to touch your skin, to feel your embrace.

He fully believes you read his mind because the second he stands beside you, your hand lays on his arm and his body relaxes, allowing to lean his weight into your side, his arm coming around to wrap around your back, clutching the back of the sweatshirt of his you’re wearing and he smiles softly, rubbing the fabric between his fingertips.

This calms him, being beside you, touching you. And his heart warms when he realises how fast you came over to help him, he’s filled with the uttermost gratitude and he wishes he can kiss you right then and there, but his head rises when he’s reminded of the person who is sitting opposite the two of you. 

Eunbin smiles when she reaches his eyes but Jaemin’s quick to avert his attention back to you with a thick gulp, watching your hands that now rest in your lap. He’s eager to slip his fingers between yours and tug you out of the house, to disappear for a little while.

“I’m sorry if I’m making things awkward, but…” Eunbin speaks up, disrupting the silence. She points at Jaemin first before she points at you which Jaemin isn’t fond of, eyes narrow slightly. “Are you guys, like, a thing?”

You clear your throat to speak first, “We’re—”

“We’re sleeping together” Jaemin tells her before he can even register what he’s saying. His lips press together in a tight line when he fully realises what he’s just blurted out, but there’s a twisted part of him that enjoys seeing the look on Eunbin’s face. His hand slips up your back to rest on your shoulder. “We’re exclusive”

The way you comically turn your head to look at Jaemin is enough to make him smile despite the ugly feeling in the pit of his stomach. He can see the uncomfortable look on your face and he’s regretful, not wanting to put you in such a position and he curses at himself for letting his pettiness get the best of him. He drops his left eye into a wink, hoping to silently reassure you and tell you everything is okay.

“Oh” Eunbin blinks, unsure of what to say. “How long?”

“A mo—”

The sound of you clearing your throat makes Jaemin stop and he looks down at you, a little confused but also worried, squeezing your shoulder in a gesture to ask if you’re alright but you ignore it as you give him a smile which he notices is not legitimate. “Sorry, I had something stuck in my throat… Anyways, I’m late so, uh, I’m gonna go. Bye”

The second you stand up from your seat, Jaemin is quick to grasp your hand in his. He sees how uncomfortable and panicky you look and his chest tightens, hoping to calm you down as his thumb grazes over the tops of your knuckles. He notices how your eyes nervously glance around the room, looking over at Eunbin who is already staring at you both and Jaemin sighs, cupping your cheeks in his hands to force you to look at him, not wanting you to feel intimidated under Eunbin’s gaze. 

“Where are you going?” He questions with a whisper. He doesn’t want you to leave without him, he wants you to whisk him away to wherever you’re heading… he doesn’t want to be alone with Eunbin. “Don’t… don’t leave”

“We’re going to be late to get breakfast with everyone” Jaemin’s eyes widen and relief instantly floods through his veins when he hears the emphasis on the ‘we’re’, realising that you’re going to take him with you and he couldn’t be more happier. He removes his hands from your cheeks to lace his fingers with your own, ready to leave right then and there.

“Wait…” Eunbin speaks up before Jaemin can even begin to ask her to leave the house. He briefly glances over at her, watching as she rubs the back of her neck and gives a nervous smile, “I just got here… I haven’t seen you in months and you’ve been avoiding me. Can we just talk? Please?”

“I—” Jaemin gulps at the sad look Eunbin casts his way and he sighs heavily, running his fingers through his hair. He’s conflicted seeing the all-to familiar sorrowful look on Eunbin’s face, it disgusts him how much it pulls at his heartstrings and makes him feel like a shitty person. But with the hand that's locked in your own and your body brushing against his from the close proximity, he wants you. He wants to leave with you. 

“It won’t be long, I promise” Eunbin promises him with hope. “Just for an hour, okay? I need to talk to you”

Jaemin’s silent now, staring at nothing in particular with his brows pulled together in deep thought, mind overcrowding with confusing thoughts and feelings that’s enough to give him a headache. His teeth bite down on his tongue with force, trying his hardest to focus on the pain to get rid of hushed voices inside of his head but he struggles deeply.

Closure, the voice in his head repeats. This could be closure. His eyes dart towards Eunbin who’s already staring back at him. Tell her how she made you feel. His forehead creases, lips forming in a straight line as his jaw tightens with a glare. Tell her how badly she fucked up.

“Fine” He nods his head once, “I’ll stay”

Jaemin turns to look at you when he feels your hand slip away from his grip, refusing to meet his eyes as your back straightens up, sending a tight lipped smile to Eunbin who seems content with his answers.

“It’s nice meeting you”

“You too,” Eunbin admits with a genuine smile. “I hope we can see each other again?”

Jaemin watches as you nod your head before bidding a quick goodbye, turning on your heel as you head out of the kitchen and Jaemin’s mouth open and closes repeatedly, unsure of what to say as he hurriedly follows behind you, latching his fingers around your wrist before you could open the front door and escape.

He presses your back against it, eyes filled with panic as they meet your emotionless ones, shocked that you’re trying to leave without even saying anything to him. Why are you mad? Did he say something wrong? Is staying not the right choice? Are you disappointed? He hates not knowing what’s going on inside your head, desperate for you to talk to him.

Jaemin’s hands shakingly come up to gently touch your face, pushing the strands of hairs neatly behind your ears as he dips his head down, trying to meet your eyes once again when you look away from him. Please look at me. He cradles your jaw, his thumb caressing your skin as he raises your head when you finally look at him and he leans in, pressing his mouth to yours in a slow kiss.

He feels your body react to him, instantly relaxing and curling your fists around the material of his hoodie to pull him closer and he complies, stepping forwards so his body is flush against yours, leaving no room for either of you. His arms slither around your waist as yours wrap around his shoulders, exhaling deeply when he feels your fingers tug at the hairs on the nape of his neck. The kiss is full of desperation, yearning, and he almost whines when you start to pull away from him, his lips immediately chasing yours but stops, opting to rest his forehead against yours as he tries to catch his breath.

“I didn’t want to stay” He tells you, wanting to explain his thought process to you. “But I think I need to do this for me, for closure” Jaemin’s hands rub the bottom of your back as he feels himself slowly go into a panicked state, wanting to calm himself down. “I need to tell her how I felt. I need her to understand that I—”

“You don’t have to explain it” You cut him off with a smile and he melts as he still feels you playing with the hair at the back of his head. “It’s okay, Jaemin”

Jaemin blinks softly, chest warming at the reassurance and he nods his head gratefully. He kisses your lips once again and he has the sudden urge to smile when he feels you kiss him back with your hand placed on his cheeks. He completely forgets about the person sitting alone in the other room, waiting for him to come back.

Truthfully, he doesn’t care about anything when he’s with you. You make him forget a lot of things that usually leave him in a rut. You help him breathe, you help him feel normal, you make everything seem worth it. 

The kiss is broken and Jaemin opens the door for you when you’re ready to leave, leaning against the wood as he stares at you, something tugging at his heart as you give him a smile and he freezes, body stiff against the door.

“Y/N…” He whispers your name softly, teeth gnawing down on his bottom lip as his palms become clammy. “I, uh… I…”

“What?” You press with a giggle.

“I…” Jaemin swallows thickly, something heavy dawning on him. He’s come to realise that you are the most important person to him, maybe even more than Jeno and that leaves him in internal shock but a smile crawls onto his lips as he stares at you a little longer. Jaemin has always appreciated the things he loves, and he wasn’t exactly sure what kind of love it is, but, “I appreciate you”

• • •

“She seems really sweet” Eunbin admits as Jaemin finds his way back into the kitchen after seeing you off, his hands shoved deep into his pockets as he leans against the countertop across from Eunbin, keeping his distance which she seems to notice almost instantly. “You can sit, you know—”

“What are you doing here?” Jaemin cuts her off with the question that's been swimming around in his mind, brows furrowing as he chews the inside of his cheek. He wants answers. He needs answers.

“I… told you. I came to see you—”

“But why?” Jaemin presses, frustration already beginning to build.

“I missed you” Eunbin admits, a sad frown displaying across her lips as she fiddles with her fingers. “I mean, I tried contacting you the entire time I was gone but you blocked my number”

“Why do you think I would keep your number after what you did?” Jaemin tilts his head to the side, staring at Eunbin who slowly sinks down into her seat under his gaze. “Do you even understand what happened? You fucked me and then you left. You didn’t tell me you were leaving, you just did”

“Jaemin—”

“Do you know how badly you fucked me up after that?” He seethes through his teeth. Jaemin doesn’t mean to get angry, but he struggles to control his emotions towards the girl that’s in front of him, wanting nothing more than her to understand what she has done. “I lost my fucking mind because of you and you were living your best life in New York”

“But we talked about New York after I confessed” Eunbin speaks with desperation in her voice. “We spoke about it and I told you that it was my dream to go, and you were supportive—”

“I was supportive of you following your dream. I wasn’t supportive of you lying to me about going to New York” Jaemin corrects, clenching his fists inside of his pockets and digging his fingernails into his palms, trying to keep control of his emotions, not wanting to break down. “You told me how the art school was the most meaningful and important thing to you, and that nothing else mattered…”

“You matter,” Eunbin quickly adds before she sighs. “I didn’t want to hurt you, Jae”

“But you did,” Jaemin smiles sadly. “I understand how important that art school was for you and I was happy that you got what you wanted because you worked hard for it… but understand from my perspective how shitty it was to find out that it was in New York and you leaving the day after”

“What I did was shitty, I know that” She admits, chewing down on her bottom lip as tears brim in her eyes. She looks down at her hands. “I shouldn’t have kept it a secret that it was in New York and I shouldn’t have left after sleeping with you… In my head, when we were arguing about it and I apologised, and then we slept together, I thought we were fine. I thought you were okay about the art school being in New York because you told me you loved me and you supported my dreams, which is why I left for it the next day”

Jaemin feels the sting as his eyes well up with his own tears and he tries to blink them back, “You thought we were fine?” That explains why she came here this morning… She thought we were still fine. 

“I’m so sorry, Jae” Eunbin stands up from her seat, making her way over to stand in front of Jaemin who tenses up and leans further back against the countertop. “I’m sorry I hurt you and I’m sorry for being so selfish… but please understand that it was never my intention to hurt you. Please”

Jaemin doesn’t speak. He can’t find the right words to describe how he’s feeling. But hearing Eunbin call herself selfish and apologise for hurting him left him in shock. He didn’t really expect Eunbin to feel this bad. Honestly, he was worried and waiting for another pending argument, to hear her tell her side of the story and stick with it, so having her admit her faults in front of him was enough to have the weight lifted off his shoulders.

Closure, the voice in his head speaks. You got your closure.

His head drops, chin touching his chest as he exhales before he slowly nods his head, an indication that Eunbin knows all too well. Jaemin accepts the apology, he hasn’t forgiven her for what happened and admittedly, he’s still a little angry, but he’s thankful for her verbal apology. 

Eunbin smiles through her tears as she steps forward, wrapping her arms around Jaemin in a tight embrace for the second time today. Jaemin’s brows jump in surprise, listening as she quietly cries against his chest, clutching his hoodie desperately and Jaemin remains still, staring down at the top of her head with his hands still buried deep in his pockets.

[a-mel0n]

This stupid "Your Name" Bucktommy AU won't leave my brain, and while I don't have enough faith in my writing skills to actually write the damn thing (and it would be my first fanfic... ever?? and that's a project that seems a bit too big for me lmao), I DID write down what I'm picturing some of the "rules" Buck and Tommy have for each other while in the other's body. Mostly just for fun. (Because Tommy would be switching in 2006, the iPhone does not exist yet, so all of his notes are written in an actual physical journal. All of Buck's notes would be on the Notes app of his phone)

TOMMY: 1) Evan, stop running into burning buildings when you don’t have to while in my body. If I wake up in a hospital bed for the fifth time this month, I might actually lose it.

its part of the job to save as many ppl as possible. also u don’t even feel the pain when i get injured in ur body.

You’re right, I don’t. Unfortunately, the pain from having a wooden beam fall on you doesn't just magically go away when we swap. Just... be more careful? Please?

fine. i’ll try and keep ur hospital visits to a minimum.

2) Can you stop flirting with people on calls? Or at the very least give them your number and not mine? In the last week alone my contact list has nearly doubled because you keep giving people my number. 

dude its not my fault you’re more popular while i’m you. just think of it as me being ur wingman! how u dont have a girlfriend is beyond me btw. hot chicks love firefighters and ur a good looking dude

Jesus Christ, Evan. For the last time, I’m single by choice.

3) Don’t shower while in my body

already dont

4) Don’t go to the bathroom while in my body 

done

5) In fact, unless you’re at work, don’t change any of my clothes while in my body. 

fair

6) Do you really need to spend so much of my paychecks on cooking supplies? I have enough pots and pans already. 

whats the point of a pantry if its half empty. be thankful ur getting actual food now via my leftovers instead of the utter tragedy that was the state of ur fridge when we first started swapping places.

7) Don’t make a scene while at work. 

your boss sucks ass and his stupid orders are going to get people killed. im not gonna listen to him if hes making bad calls while lives are on the line

Evan.

8) Don’t pick up the phone when my dad calls.

got it

BUCK: 1) quit going to eddie’s basketball pickup games. he keeps inviting me while i’m in my own body and its getting harder and harder to come up with excuses as to why i can’t go. it's kinda awkward.

I thought you’d be more grateful, Evan. You’re the coolest guy on the court when I’m you. 

2) are you making movie references when ur me? bc chim keeps asking when i got so “cultured” and the other day maddie asked when i watched the princess bride. 

You haven’t seen the Princess Bride? I’m leaving you a surprise for tomorrow. Check your couch when you wake up. 

did you spend my OWN money on a dvd??? i don’t even own a dvd player. i own every streaming service imaginable.

3) keep the finger guns to a minimum?? idk why you do them so much but both hen and chim have said smth abt it

4) if u get a call from someone called connor or kameron on my phone just let it go to voicemail its personal stuff and i'll deal with it

Evan, you could have told me you agreed to be a sperm donor yourself. Finding out because Connor and Kameron showed up at the fire house was more of a shock than finding out over these memos would have been. 

they did what?????

5) don’t talk to my parents

Done.

6) No rule about undressing? 

dude idc. i’m not gonna stop you from taking a piss in my body if u need to. as long as you like. don’t have sex with someone while you’re me? oh wait hang on i DO have a rule about undressing

7) DON’T HAVE ANY RANDOM HOOK UPS IN MY BODY. 

Wasn’t planning on it, but good to know.