#I could see either being in character because people can react really weirdly under extreme duress

[transhetanybodys]

So like I'm a fan of Anybodys hanging back and looking disgusted while the other Jets try to sa Anita, but honestly if I had been the creator of West Side Story I would've been tempted to write him being the one lowered onto her. Imagine how visceral that would've been, how powerful a statement on toxic masculinity it would've been if the Jets had essentially tried to welcome Anybodys into the gang and into manhood in the same way that you would haze someone into a frat; by egging them on to sexually assault a woman. "You wanna be a man? Okay but first you've gotta prove you've got what it takes by saing this woman." And then in my head they're starting to pass him something vaguely phallic to use in lieu of the dick he doesn't have when Doc comes into the shop.

[scripttorture]

We know that torture is very wrong and very much doesn't work. But there are people who believe that, while wrong, it works. If someone who believed that torture works was to be captured and tortured, could their perception possibly influence how they react? My MC has been raised with stories of the Big Bad Regime being "skilled" at extracting information, which is mostly a product of fearmongering propaganda from said Regime. Fictional fantasy setting with magic involved, if that matters.

So that’s an interesting question. It’s only fair to start out by saying that this doesn’t come up that much in interviews with survivors, which means I don’t think I can really comb through accounts and come out with a consensus. Most of this is going to be my opinion based on what I’ve read.

 And weirdly the impression I get from interviews is that someone’s actual direct experience of torture doesn’t seem to have much impact on whether they believe torture ‘works’ or not. Which seems really counter intuitive. But then again we’re talking about something that produces mental illness and memory problems, so a logical outlook isn’t a fair thing to ask for.

 This is most obvious with torturers where you find victim accounts of torturers stating that a particular technique ‘always works’ in an account where the survivor didn’t confess or say anything. But you do also see it in survivors.

 Honestly? I think this is probably the perspective/assumptions of most people who are tortured. Simply because it’s a really common set of assumptions globally.

 Running through this question is the assumption that your MC has to know something worthwhile. In reality most of the people who are tortured don’t actually know anything relevant. That’s part of why it has such a huge negative impact on investigations, people who know nothing are strongly encouraged to lie and each of those lies then needs to be followed up.

 I have read survivor accounts where people assumed that they’d give up information under torture, so they ‘talked’ and were tortured anyway. I’ve read accounts where they refused to talk and then lied under torture. I’ve read accounts where they just didn’t say anything.

 I’m not sure that the victim’s underling assumptions about torture or perspective did have an influence on these responses. I can’t confidently say it didn’t, but I can’t be confident it did either. Without more in-depth analysis these responses appear to be highly individual responses to an extremely stressful situation, in the same way that ‘fight, flight or freeze’ often is.

 So I think the best idea here is to approach this as a writing problem first.

 If you want to emphasise this perspective and the fear it create in these scenes what sort of response supports that? How can you use a reaction rooted in fear to tell readers more about your character?

 If the character thinks of themselves as ‘tough’ or ‘macho’ then they might try to stay silent and might struggle with feelings of shame if they end up screaming. Note we’re not trying to judge the response here, but using the response to illustrate things about the character’s self image and what it depends upon.

 You could show the character staying quiet throughout, not as a thought-through response, but because they just froze. And then having to deal with other people putting moral weight on something they know was just a bodily reaction.

 You can show readers the character’s inventiveness or cleverness by the way they lie. You can have the character plead that they don’t know anything, either as an active strategy or instinctively.

 And you can have the character coming away from all of this feeling like they ‘got lucky’ or feeling as if they were the Brave Clever Exception to the general rule.

 I guess what I’m saying here is that writing these assumptions into your world is no bad thing. It’s a legit writing choice that you can engage with to make your world building and your characters deeper.

 If everyone believes that these torturers are ‘skilled’ and unbeatable, if everyone is terrified of them- Then how will other characters respond to your MC saying they didn’t give up any information, didn’t waver?

 Would they believe it? They might assume it’s something the MC is telling themselves in order to deal with a traumatic experience, to avoid the reality of what happened. They might assume the MC is consciously lying and make a judgement (sympathetic or not) based on that. They might think it means the MC is unusual, special.

 If they think it means the MC is special would they push them to do more then they’re capable of? Ignore their symptoms? Assume they can ‘tough it out’? They might even assume that it’s a sign of some rare magical ability.

 You have a lot of options here, a lot of ways to feed more interest into the story based on this set of cultural assumptions.

 I hope that helps :)

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[jq37]

The Royal Report– A Crown of Candy Ep 11 In the Mountains of Sweetness

Requiem 

The Rocks family is on the run but they’re also in mourning. As they sail up the Cola River, they stop to do repairs to the ship and pay their respects to Jet at a bright pink hill under a tree--her final resting place.

The remaining kids are in opposite worlds emotionally speaking--Liam is fully sobbing (which we find out later is largely him still being messed up over Preston) while Ruby is hollow and bitter. Amethar (after almost murdering a Jellybean farmer with poor timing who wanders onto the scene) eulogizes about how much Jet taught all of them (including that “to defeat monsters you must become one” which mmm don’t love where his head is at; also, Brennan says he seems to almost have this new sobriety which I think, mechanically, is him having taken a level of Battlemaster Fighter). 

Cara, also a wreck as you’d expect, wonders if Jet died thinking she didn’t love her and wishes Jet would have just listened to her--something that Ruby takes as blaming Jet for her own death, causing her to stalk off. Cara is too in her grief to really react but Theo goes after her. As he does, Cumulous notices that, for a split second, Ruby’s shadow seemed to be out of sync with her actions. But only for a second. 

When Theo catches up to her, Ruby gets really upset and says that she blames her parents, Lazuli, and herself for Jet’s death. Theo says that Jet wouldn’t have blamed her and that she died in battle, like she wanted. Even still, Ruby doesn’t know how she’s going to go on without her. Theo says that he takes comfort in Lazuli’s research and the thought that Jet might not be truly gone. She could be around and protecting them right now. “She was always protecting us,” Ruby says before mind-hopping into Yak and flying above the ship so she doesn’t have to deal with her emotions for the moment.

Once she’s gone, Theo breaks down for a second and then summons Sprinkle...to dismiss him. He tells Sprinkle he’s done a great job but he needs to go back where he came from and have Jet send a new familiar as a sign. Sprinkle tearfully leaves and, almost immediately (which is not how the spell traditionally works btw) a Black Licorice viper shows up which Theo names Princess and which bites him for no reason. Feels right.

Back at the grave-site, Cara starts to walk away but Amethar catches her and leads her back to the ship. They run into Theo and when she sees him with his new familiar, she goes off on him: Oh Jet is watching over us? Who was watching over her? And don’t think I don’t know about your crush on Lazuli. I have one daughter left. You think you can do a better job at protecting her? That kind of thing. She goes to board the ship but Amethar stays behind saying he’ll be with her in a minute, something that made *me* feel like I was about to get chewed out by Amethar’s wife.

Liam remembers that Cal--the traitor--saved Jack and Brie and decides to (as he is wont to do) ask about it in the clumsiest way possible. Jack says that they didn’t meet up with Cal on purpose or anything--they just happened to stumble across him and, now that he thinks about it, it was weirdly easy the way Cal got them through enemy lines and stuff. He seems pretty on the level so Liam does his Ranger thing to check for danger while they’re docked.

Back with Theo and Amethar, Theo says he’s fine so Amethar catches up with Cara and says that she can’t turn on Theo like that. They don’t have a lot of allies left. On a dirty 20 Persuasion check, we are spared the marital spat of a lifetime and instead she just presses herself against him and he brings her into a hug.

Sweet Life on Deck*

*I knew I’d get to use it eventually!

The next day, as they set sail, Cara apologizes to Theo for taking her grief out on him and he’s very gracious about it--also assuring her that he doesn’t hate her for winning Lazuli’s affections as she suggested nor does he have a crush on her--he just strongly believes in her ideals.

Cumulous finds Ruby to have a chat with her about his favorite topic (well second fave after magical items)--death. Ruby says that, with Jet dead, all she cares about is revenge and that she’s dead inside. Cumulous, who clearly doesn’t have Inspiring Speech on his character sheet (or, if he does, learned from Kristen), rambles about death for a bit before saying that though they’ll all die eventually, she doesn’t have to die yet and gives Ruby his necklace from Lazuli. She pockets it and walks away.   

Liam, with his Ranger senses, knows they’re being followed but also knows that they have the jump on them so they shouldn’t have a problem staying ahead. Jack and Amethar have a heart to heart wherein Jack blames himself for spilling the beans about Ghee and Amethar says it’s not his fault. They reaffirm that they’re in it together for the long haul. 

In the night, Liam has an intense dream involving familiar snarling, heat, smoke, chocolate, and cinnamon. Ruby wakes up in the middle of the night with Lazuli’s necklace glowing a little bit. The glow fades and then she notices, like Cumulous did, that her shadow is a little off--but it quickly corrects itself. All messed up, she goes onto the deck and finds that she can suddenly see perfectly in the dark. And, on a Nat 20 Perception check, she sees that the eye of the Lazuli necklace is a little creased, like it has smile lines. It glows brightly and casts her shadow on the wall--except it’s not the shadow she should have. It looks like her except the hair--the hair is in a long braid. Ruby presses her forehead against the forehead of the shadow and finds that it’s warm. And, as she does so, she fully breaks down for the first time since Jet’s death and the shadow does so alongside her. (Mechanically speaking, Ruby took a level of Shadow Sorcerer).

In the morning they dock, having gotten as far up the river as the ship can take them. It’s a long trip to the mountains and Muffinfield--Cal’s territory--is in their path. They have the option to go through the town fully, take the more off the beaten path route, or a little of both but either way it’s gonna take at least a full week (and up to three if they fully avoid the town). They decide to take the hybrid route which takes them into Muffinfield to begin with. It’s a rich province and very Bulbian. Tons of Imperial guards, tons of churches, and, in fact, they see a church putting on one of those puppet show/morality plays. Amethar makes the, mmm, unwise decision to check it out and sees that it’s a play about the Rocks family, depicting him as a horny lout, Cara as an airheaded bimbo, and the twins as feral bastards. Ruby sets the puppets on fire and Amethar hustles her away before she can do something more rash.

After that, they get to the woods--staying for a night with a lady so old and out of touch that she doesn’t even know that Amethar’s dad isn’t king anymore. Theo thanks Liam for saving Jet’s body and they bond over how much rage they have over, like, everything that's happened.

The Gang Gets Scooped

When they get back on the road (with some not so hot stealth checks), they see a little gingerbread guy in a Peter Pan cap who’s trying to pull his friend out from under a rock. Theo, knight to his core, rushes to help but Liam, who’s on the warpath, decides to shoot him. An insane course of action but he’s not wrong because a net captures both Theo and the gingerbread man and this turns out to be an ambush. The “friend” was a doll and the Gingerbread man (Swifty is his name) pulls a lollipop shiv on Theo because of course. When Theo says he’s not pro-Bulb, Swifty calls for Gooey--the chief marauder who is this buff warrior woman with half her face melted (like melted chocolate) like she was badly burned. She and this chocolate viking dude (Jon Bon) discuss whether they should take the group to the queen, which they decide to do, shackling everyone (though Liam and Ruby successfully conceal their thieves' tools in their hands for a later escape). At the mention of the queen, the assembled marauders start chanting “Long live the queen”--harkening back to the mountain gratifi from two episodes ago. They take them to their secret hideout in the mountains while Swifty runs ahead to let them know they’re coming. 

All their captors are Candian but they’re all deformed in some way and/or have old Sucrosi tattoos and Sweetening Path stuff, ears of Ceresians/Vegetanians on necklaces (EARS BRENNAN?), and defiled Bulbian relics. They’re from all over but they seem like they’ve been living this life for years.

The hideout is kinda built into the cliff side and it has this big rock outside like the standing stones the SPF has (menhir is the technical term).  It’s also covered in a layer of snow and very cold. Magical light is glowing as they pass through the entrance. Cumulous can feel very powerful magic at work. There’s a ton of ceremony and fanfare and chanting in advance of the queen’s arrival--these people seem to really love their queen, and so do we because out comes Queen Saccharina Frostwhip aka, Emily’s new character (aka Rina because I’m not typing that every time)! 

She is this extremely cool (in both senses of the word) ice-cream sorcerer with a magic staff (Winterscoop) and two swords and is majorly serving sweet but frosty-cool energy. Liam and Ruby spring everyone from their chains and Rina aggressively sweetly says that she would have freed them soon enough. She calls herself the legal ruler of Candia and when Cara questions that she says that she has another last name: Ghee. Amethar, is like, “Oh shit,” but she says that she’s not here to force a relationship on him, she just thinks they can all be useful to each other, especially since she’s the legal heir as the child of his legal marriage and someone not in open rebellion with the Concord. Theo is like, “That all checks out.” He asks Amethar if this is actually his kid and he sees in Rina Ghee’s eyes and his own swagger. Yeah, that’s his kid. In turn, she recognizes Cumulous as a monk of the Order of the Spinning Star. She, like half the party it feels--is a huge Lazuli stan, can feel her magic on him, and believes in her mission. She says she’s seen Lazuli in her dreams when she was little and Cumulous in her sees someone who can, in a lot of ways, take up Lazuli’s mantle and start rebuilding Candian magic rather than just doing triage like the monks have been. He bows to her. Ruby is not having any of this though and says that Rina isn’t her sister or her queen.

Theo asks Princess if they should trust her--she’s saying all the right things but he’s wary--and gets a bite which tells him nothing.

Ice Feast

Rina, upon being told special guests were coming, had a feast prepared which is described as Robin Hood-y. Amethar is like, “This is cool but the Bulbian church is literally trying to kill us so maybe we focus on that?” Rina says that that works for her. All Amethar has to do is recognize her as his daughter and heir and everything will be square--if the church wants to go after them at that point, they’ll have to break their own rules. Ruby, who’s still being obstinate says that it won’t work because she’s clearly a heretic with an allegiance to the Sweetening Path but Rina says and Jack confirms that as long as you kiss the ring in public, no one really cares what you do on your home turf. 

Ruby accuses her of not knowing what she’s talking about because she’s been hidden away her whole life and Rina shoots back (still smiling) that she’s actually been traveling the world, building her followers from scratch which she had to do because she came from nothing. Amethar (who’s in the, I would have to imagine, pretty novel position of watching his daughters fight) breaks it up. Cara--who fully hates that not only is this happening, it’s also their best shot--takes Ruby with her to have their meal somewhere else and Ruby, who has found someone to hate more than her mom, willingly goes. 

Rina has a sidebar with Amethar where she apologizes for popping up randomly and upsetting his entire family. She always wanted to meet them and she’s sorry that these are the circumstances. Amethar says that it’s not her fault--they’ve just been through a hell of a lot lately and they’re kind of emotionally spent but she’s actually a huge asset to them politically right now and he’s sure that once things are calm, things will be different on the relationship front. 

Ruby can’t believe Cara is taking all of this lying down and Cara (who is full John Mulaney, “This might as well happen,”) says she can’t remember the last time she had a handle on her life which is news to Ruby who thought she *was* the handle. Cara hits her with the unfortunate truth that no one--least of all kings and queens--knows what they’re doing or can really control it. All she can control is what she’s doing next which is having a bath. Ruby decides to, instead, cast Invisibility and look around for anything suspicious. 

After seeing a bunch of stolen loot, weapons, and Candian artifacts it seems like Rina’s trying to preserve, she eventually finds Rina in her quarters. On a 25 Perception to Ruby’s 24 Stealth, Rina clocks her and whispers, “I’m not here to take your family, little sister. I look forward to the day that we are friends.” Ruby, channeling Adaine in a big way, flips invisible double middle fingers. 

Cumulous is in another room, just fanboy happy-crying over all of Rina’s magic stuff in some of the funniest scenes Zac has ever done which is saying a lot. I cannot overstate how funny Zac crying over an imaginary ring pop is.  

Theo also finds Rina and asks about her visions of Lazuli. She says it happened when she was very young and her powers were just manifesting. She was in a place where magic wasn’t supported and the connection was all but beaten out of her. But she can also sense Lazuli’s presence in Theo. Ruby, still invisible, pipes up that she sees Lazuli too so she’s not special and Rina shoots back that she can also see Ruby while invisible, which is pretty special. This dissolves into a little sibling spat which Rina says she enjoys because she’s never had a sister to fight with before. The comment sets off Ruby again who says she already had a sister and she’s dead and she can’t replace her. She runs off.

Theo and Rina speak a little more and she reveals that she doesn’t really care about the throne. She just cares about bringing back magic and destroying the church (which means she’ll fit right in with the rest of the fam--not really wanting the throne and plotting against the church. The family business). 

After the feast, Gooey brings out the war maps (moving the Jawbreaker flag away from Castle Manylicks and deeper into the mountain and putting an ice cream cone flag deep into the mountains) and a bunch of magic tomes which Rina starts reading. Ruby notices that a lot of the tomes are written in Lazuli’s hand, she had a way to tap into the SPF’s runes, and that she wrote some kind of warning about the SPF--Lazuli did not trust or revere the SPF. Liam sees a book with the same ice cream symbol as the flag on the map and it’s a book of lost beast lore--including an ancient spirit described on pages scented like cinnamon and seemingly bound in some way (and also amongst a lot of SPF talk): Dracoria Azucar (or, Sugar Dragon). 

Anyway, Rina says that the SPF has done a lot to suppress Lazuli’s research (she’s not sure if she thinks it’s too dangerous or if she’s hoarding it or what) including taking all of her coolest relics and findings and hiding them in a frozen temple--the Ice Cream Temple. She wants to loot that temple. (Note: She also mentions that Kerradin visited her orphanage when she was little which...Bad). She’s sent raid parties who haven’t come back but they weren’t super powerful--she has a lot of angry, rescued orphans in her service. The gang more or less agrees to her plan--even Ruby reluctantly, but Ruby hears the SPF on the wind, “Things that are wrong may yet be made right. There is more than one true magician in Candia, Princess and I await your coming and will be delighted for your wish to come true.” 

A Change of Plans  

In the morning, they decide Cara will stay with Jack and the marauders while they (and some of Jack’s men) go on their mission. When Jack offhandedly says that Ghee was lovely, Rina says they had very different experiences with her. Ominous!  

Theo asks what’s going on with the Jawbreaker situation and she says that they’re in kind of a pissing contest--he won’t recognize her claim to the throne. Gooey pulls Rina aside and informs her (for the first time it seems) that Jawbreaker has left the Castle because people in the area were being tortured by Ceresian soldiers (wasn’t specified but I’m guessing Imperials) to draw him out and now he’s pinned down in the mountains. Rina (along w/ Gooey and Swifty) consider that if they help Jawbreaker, he’ll be more likely to acknowledge her claim to the throne. But, if they don’t and they let him die, Liam will be heir and he’s already on Team Rina. In the end, she decides to tell the group and they are keen on rescuing Jawbreaker--even though Liam is concerned because he knows his dad will never give up the throne. 

Everyone seems pretty gung ho about this except for Ruby who is like, “Hello we’re super outnumbered.” Cara has a solution to that however. She’s been up all night reading Lazuli’s books and she thinks she can bamf them past enemy lines if they can get to the nearby Spinning Star monastery. She can get them back too but because there’s not a teleportation circle where they’re going, she has to basically do the magical equivalent of holding her breath or remembering a really long series of numbers while they get in and get out. They won’t have much time.

They go to the monastery (where Rina’s anti-monarchical sentiments wins her another new fan in another monk named Snicker-Snack because sure) and Cumulous kills a chicken for that sweet temp HP. Cara says, “Lazuli, please help me get this right,” before performing her magic and sending them all to a dark, locked, musty building. They can hear Ceresian soldiers shouting outside--and that’s where we end our episode! 

Note: You can find the art for the new characters this episode on the D20 tumblr here! Once again, Samir is coming for some of y’all specifically with some of these designs.

Things I’m Concerned About

I’m gonna separate my thoughts on Rina across these two sections because my thoughts are hard in separate directions. I *love* Rina but I have to be honest with myself and say that if she was an NPC, I fully wouldn’t trust her. She comes in at the exact right time saying all the right things and coming with a major plot solution. She says she doesn’t care about the throne and she only wants to destroy the church (something that would make sense considering the backstory hints the dropped) and we haven’t had PvP before but like...if there was a season to do it...listen, I want her to just be this cool orphan who sincerely wants justice and a relationship with her dad and sister if that’s on the table but I’m just keeping my eye on her. (Also, when Gooey pulled her aside to have that troop movement convo I feared it was going to go in a much more suspicious direction.)

There’s a part that I kinda glossed over where Brennan says Manta Ray Jack looked at Rina “bashfully” and Rina took it as, “He’s gonna ask me out,” and rebuffed his advances. I feel like that’s not what that was about. That doesn’t mean it’s anything actively bad--maybe him remembering her mom?--but idk, I don’t like feeling like I’m missing something.

Oh, and speaking of her mom? Rina saying he had a different experience of her mom than she did combined with Rina saying her connection to Lazuli was “all but beaten out of her” plus the out of game knowledge that something related to child neglect happens in a few eps that’s so bad that Brennan hurt himself...It paints a Bad picture.

Once again, I am Concerned about everything going on with the SPF. What did she mean there’s more than one magician? Was she referring to Ruby? Does she want Ruby to PvP Rina? She better not. 

Little concerned about Annabelle’s side mission to find Ghee. I was before but now I am even more. 

Five A Few More Things

I want to believe that Jet is both partially inhabiting Princess and doing the Shadow Sorc thing with Ruby. The Pontifex works hard but Jet Rocks works harder. 

OK, let’s talk about what I call The Inherent Tragedy of Saccharina Frostwhip (*such* a good name, btw). If Ruby and Jet had met Rina *together* (either during peace times or having rolled a high enough Insight check to clock her as an ally during the present events) they would have loved her completely immediately. She’s got Cool Big Sister written all over her: cool design, martial prowess and magic, anti-monarchy and anti-Bulbian Church BUT willing to take the throne in their stead. They would have LOVED her. BUT, Rina wasn’t an NPC. She was Emily’s backup character. Which means that, because of the way our world bisects the world of Candia, there is never a world where Jet is alive while Rina comes into play. That’s tragic, man. That’s the worst. And when I say that’s the worst, I mean the best. This makes for such delicious story. You guys know I’m a full sucker for sister stuff. Which we were already getting but this is *complicated* sister stuff which we all know is better. Like, if this is where we’re starting emotionally, do you know good it’s gonna hit if Ruby eventually comes around on her? Siobhan and Emily are catering to me specifically this season.

Also, that reveal? Within like five minutes, my theory that “the Queen” in question was Amethar’s first kid was confirmed, my circa episode 3 prediction that a twin would die and come back as Amethar’s first kid was confirmed, AND my prediction from last episode that the SPF was telling a technical truth about Ruby finding her sister was confirmed. (Literal) sweet vindication! Can I do lotto numbers? No. But plot points for a Candy/GoT mashup? I’m your gal. 

Lol at someone mentioning Ghee as Amethar’s wife with Cara standing right there and Amethar fully WWE bodyslaming that dude with tag-teams for the entire family.

People are saying it seems like Rina is a Storm Sorcerer which would be cool seeing as Amethar is a Storm Herald Barbarian. Family parallels even without really knowing each other.  

Cara--who better survive this or I will Riot--needs like a 6 month spa trip after this is over. What she is dealing with right now is untenable and she is handling it much better than I would be honestly. (But also her, “lol, my life is in shambles,” to Liam’s inappropriate question that didn’t even really register to her at that point was another comedy highlight of the ep. Icon, even in mourning.) 

Lazuli might as well be a PC for how important she is to this campaign. 

Ooooh, Sugar Dragon for Liam? Brennan has outdone himself. (Unless Liam is gonna have to fight the Sugar Dragon which I am also super down for. As I was just discussing, there are never enough dragons in D&D for a game that’s half named after them).

Shout out to this post for making me short circuit for a full second. Ow. 

It’s a little funny that Brennan laid the groundwork for Emily’s background character in the middle of the episode he knew was gonna end with him trying to kill them. Like, OK, your future is secure, now time to destroy your present!

[progmanx]

So? Part 2?

Well, now that it’s been released digitally, I can actually answer this question. Thank you for your patience. So, uh, spoilers, if you haven’t read Turf Wars Part 2 yet. I guess.

Short version: It’s just as bad as Part 1 (if not worse), but for slightly different reasons. For mine and @lokgifsandmusings‘s thoughts on Part 1, you can read our several articles about the first installment, as well as our good friend Bo’s take on Part 2 who makes some excellent points on why nothing works. I’m going to do my best not to reiterate the things he’s discussed, as I think his work does a better job of laying out that argument than I could. So go read that first, if you want.

Slightly Longer Version (That’s Shorter Than The Short Version?): Mike (there’s no way Bryan is actually consulting on anything aside from the art; Asami is his baby) clearly neglected to rewatch his own series/re-read his own series bible, and the scope of this negligence goes so far beyond nitpicking it’s baffling. The narrative threads and characterization of our two heroes are jumbled and essentially nonsensical.

Extremely Long Version: Sigh. I would like to preface this by asserting that my opinion of Turf Wars is in no way related to the work I did with RRaU, or Spin the Rails as a whole. Sure, I thought a lot about the world and this relationship, but frankly no conclusion I came to couldn’t also be reached by anyone else who puts in the time. Just because Mike continued the narrative differently doesn’t mean I wouldn’t like it automatically. The fact of the matter is, I really wanted to like this. It just so happens that the method Mike chose is…like, kind of the worst possible amalgamation of bad narrative decisions he could make short of turning full edgelord.

This got extremely long, hence the moniker, so it’s under the cut.

Anyway, my problems and critiques of Turf Wars are that of the product itself, how it chooses to continue the story of the animated series proper.

Now that that’s out of the way: I kind of hate almost everything about it. Yeah, I’m probably gonna lose followers for that. I want queer rep, and I want it badly, but if we can’t even criticize what we get without getting thrown out onto the street, how will it get any better? It’s not all or nothing.

Not even Turf Wars is all or nothing. I still stand by what @lokgifsandmusings and I said in our pieces regarding Part 1: It’s an overall good thing that it exists, and it’s not hurting anyone. However, that does not mean I think it itself is actually anything close to good, narratively speaking.

If I really had to boil down all of my problems with this…since Bo’s argument regarding how these books are overly stuffed with narratives that have no connection to one another aside from the fact that Asami gets kidnapped (we’re gonna dissect that one) and that none of it actually serves any purpose other than treading water for…something is so comprehensive and great. Seriously, read it!

Fact of the matter is, there’s no reason for any of these narratives to exist. It doesn’t push anyone’s character forward, with the exception of Zhu Li, Toguka (who even cares?), possibly Keum, and I guess by default Raiko by making him more of a jerk. None of those characters are the principal cast, meaning that this whole damn thing is, as far as I can see, really weird, overwritten filler.

Filler for what? I have no earthly idea, but if the only thing that changes out of this graphic novel series is that Zhu Li becomes President, then…you could have done that off-screen. Like how Raiko won. Neither Bryan nor Mike know how to write politics (or business, but that’s another conversation) so why not? Saves a lot of time.

Okay, so, there’s one other change that could happen in this “filler arc”. And it’s something that everything so far seems to be pointing to as a resolution. For anything to make sense, Asami has to basically say to Korra, “I’m a liability and will only keep getting in the way, so we either have to keep our relationship a secret or break up.” Probably to get rejected by Korra, or the world, or something. Which is just…terrible and ridiculous, as I’ll outline more in this post/rant/essay/dissertation. It has nothing to do with them being a same-sex couple, which is somehow both not as bad (because that shouldn’t matter) and worse (because of Kya’s infodump in Part 1).

Anyway, on to the biggest issues above all: our two “protagonists”. Well, more like the title character and also that lady she’s banging. Because it’s really hard to see how Korra and Asami are actually relevant to any of the narrative threads in this story aside from the ones they are forcibly pulled into so they can react to things. And this isn’t even accounting for how Mike is somehow able to write literally everyone else just fine except for Korra and Asami! It’s so freaking weird!

Korra, even more than she was in Part 1, has been almost comically back dialed to her Book 1 characterization. At best, it’s Book 2, but that is a stretch. Everything she does it to try and bust some heads, and even goes out of her way to physically assault Raiko’s campaign advisor. This isn’t even accounting the flagrant abuse of the Avatar State in Part 1, or the many other microaggressions that keep popping up.

Book 4 Korra would not do this. That was like—it’s her whole fucking series arc. She doesn’t look for fights! She tries to resolve them before they get bad, and especially with Asami she backs down and tries to diffuse and explain the situation. Like, you know, that time when Asami snapped at her in 4x07 in contrast to how Mako snapped at her also in 4x07?

But it goes deeper than tossing out years of character growth because “lol conflict”. I felt that the interactions between Korra and Asami here read embarrassingly straight. What I mean by that is, it’s how I imagine a straight dude would believe “special” relationships (ie queer, who aren’t) should be written. It’s something that a lot of non-queer writers struggle with, since there’s this false belief that treating those “different” from you as unique or better props them up, when in reality it artificially props them up in a way that is inherently insincere. Mike wants to show us he understands how important this relationship is, and how it’s important to him, but the words he’s choosing have the opposite effect.

It reminds me of the “Magical Negro” trope that originated in Hollywood as an absurd, and then eventually harmful, overcompensation for making sure people knew that they weren’t racist by making every minority character in a given film the perfect wisdom to set the hero on their journey. It’s same basic principle, as Mike is trying to make sure as loudly as possible that we know he’s super supportive of all of this…but the outcome is just plain weird and dangerous, even though his intentions are absolutely good.

Remember that bit in Part 1 where Asami says that the Spirit World is special and unique, like their relationship? Welp. It’s not. It was exceptionally well-written and true-to-life in its queerness but I guess not anymore, huh?

They’re more caricatures of their former selves than they are actual characters in these moments. The purest irony here is that these scenes, the “relationship scenes”, are actually pandering. Like, while the show wasn’t and yet anti-korrasami people kept yelling that it was (it wasn’t; that’s not how animation production works) boom, here we go. Actual pandering. (And yes, this is an entirely subjective opinion, but isn’t that kinda what this ask was for?)

Thirsty Asami, Overprotective Korra; these characterizations not only don’t make sense, but they’re exactly what the fandom has been asking for despite neither of them really fitting at all with previous characterizations. These things are supposed to build off one another, and yet they just go in random directions. Okay, fine, in fairness, Thirsty Asami only doesn’t make sense in the context we see it here, rather than a general sense. She can be horny, but that was the weirdest segue to that sort of tone, and it felt shoehorned in as fanservice. Need proof? Look no further:

I mean, seriously? The final lines of the TV show? That’s…every single fanfic writer has at least considered doing that because of the free sentimentality points due to the emotions attached to that final scene, but good lord that is some blatant not-helpful fanservice that, to me, feels automatically pandering right there.

Because that’s what their relationship reads as in these comics. Fanservice. It’s meaningless fluff that seems as though it’s actively refusing to progress either character in personal and communal growth. It serves no other purpose than to reinforce the idea that Asami is a liability (and that Korra’s feelings are the so super strong for her you guys that she’s overprotective lmao). Which is so beyond absurd a notion to have, according to the show itself, because Korra has been present for almost every doofus Asami has decked:

This is also depicted in the end of Part 1, where Korra chooses to save Asami (who is either drunk or high as balls considering her hilariously inept and counter-canon combat performance) from a rock instead of Tokuga. Which just ties into what happens to Asami at the end of Part 2. Yes, the kidnapping. I already talked about the kidnapping, and lo and behold, I was right. Tokuga kidnaps Asami to get to Korra (how original!), and is weirdly okay with them being in a relationship. Remember that homophobia in this universe that may still exist in the Fire Nation because nobody bothered to clarify that? Welp, apparently it didn’t mean squat because Korra just flat out tells a security guard that she’s dating Asami when they were all like “hey let’s keep this to ourselves for the time being”. Even the supervillains don’t care that queer people exist, I guess?

Which of course leads to this scene:

Okay, no. No, there are…so, so many ways to get out of this scenario. First, that’s not a real knife. It’s a fire made in the shape of a blade. It does have mass, but whatever level of “sharpness” it has can’t really retain shape because it’s FIRE. It’s not ice. Asami could presumably just run through it, suffering some nasty burns, and jump to safety because there are plenty of people there who could catch her. Second, that dude is an old man. Asami has taken down multiple terrorists simultaneously. She could just kick him in the balls with her heel. It’s super easy. Third, Asami has been trained in “self-defense” since her mother was murdered (we’ll circle back to this) by firebenders, the implication being that it was the Agni Kai Triad.

So, Hiroshi, being a hardcore genocidal anti-bender crazy person with a daughter insists that she start learning to defend herself at the age of like 5…what do you think those lessons are? I’ve covered this in my Jings and Other Things post, but frankly it doesn’t take a whole lot of thought to realize that “oh he’d make sure she was trained to fight against benders.” That actually circles back to point two, since hey, remember how firebending works?

Remember when Uncle Iroh was all “firebending comes from the breath, not the muscles”? Which lead to Zhao getting his butt kicked by Zuko? All Asami has to do is knock the wind out of this old geezer and jump. Or break his concentration, because, again, not a real knife. This is something she would absolutely know.

Elbow his stomach, kick him in the balls, bite his knuckles, break his nose with the back of her head, kick out his legs, throw herself backwards—the list goes on. Something so fundamental to the universe, to the point that it was sort of Zuko’s whole thing, rebelling against Sozin’s perverted firebending teachings (DANCING DRAGON FORM) through the previous series, being ignored and seemingly retconned because…Mike forgot? And didn’t do any research on his own work to make sure it remained consistent? Uh, okay.

You don’t need to be an action director to think of any of these, especially if you’ve seen the TV show in question. Also, just as an aside to Korra not being able to locate Asami…she, uh, has spirit GPS? Remember that? Through the vines? Found Wu, and Jinora. Just kind supports my theory that Mike forgot to watch his own show. Since that was like, important to Korra’s healing arc.

Anyway, for Asami’s character as a whole…good lord. I don’t…she’s, again, either drunk or high as balls. I mean how else do you explain her being super chill and okay with working with Zhu Li in the first place? Didn’t her husband steal her company? Something that Zhu Li had to have been complicit in considering she was in prison with him? None of this makes any sense! Asami’s convictions on what is just and what is not are kind of her core (remember the Equalists?), so for them to just be thrown out because plot is a little strange and disconcerting.

I’m not saying she wouldn’t work with Zhu Li for the good of the city; she did the same with Varrick and that rings true to me because it’s not like she spent three years rebuilding the fucking thing. Of course she’d be protective of it! It’s also her home. But all of that pales in comparison to the single most glaring thing that is addressed briefly, in passing, in Part 1, but isn’t even mentioned in Part 2:

I just—Korra got a phenomenal healing arc. Asami is the second half of this couple that they are banking these book sales on, and she’s not given room to grieve? To acknowledge that her father was not only murdered, but sacrificed himself to save her life and how complicated and conflicting those feelings have to be considering he tried to murder her back in Book 1? Yeah, that is a meaty subject matter that can absolutely be tackled by a comic. You just sort of have to actually do it and not sweep it under the rug. But that’s what they do, despite the fact that he’s been dead for, oh, I dunno, like less than a month? Nobody can recover that quickly. No one. Not even the Avatar, and we literally saw that in action.

I get that Kuvira isn’t physically in this, and that the corpse of the massive mecha-giant that could not have possibly been moved via conventional means (it was covered in vines that not even Korra can safely remove, remember?) is randomly missing after Korra and Asami get back from their vacation but I really feel like Raiko’s surrender directly leading to Hiroshi’s death is something that could easily be dug into. Even if it’s not totally rational, because it doesn’t have to be because grief and emotions are not rational.

I mean, I doubt I need to get into the fact that Asami is once again sidelined in a plot that should be about her (the reconstruction effort was literally her thing between Books 3 and 4), since that one is just—it’s there. That’s what it is. Zhu Li gets it because she’s around, I guess? And because Raiko is a terrible President who needed to get ousted anyway (why is he not letting people get their food???), but why wouldn’t whatever theoretical legislature just impeach him while Korra and Asami were on vacation? What purpose does this narrative actually serve since we already don’t like Raiko and would want anyone in that position that isn’t him? Preferably someone who lost in the first round of elections—I’ll stop there. It just unfolds with the slightest tug.

SPEAKING OF DEAD PARENTS (perfect segue) remember when I reminded you that Asami’s mother was murdered by firebenders? After a break-in? When she was five? Wow that must have been pretty traumatizing for her considering it literally radicalized her father into becoming a genocidal maniac. Which, you know, makes it extremely strange that this isn’t brought up or addressed when Jargala and her crew do like, the same thing to Asami.

Wow that’s scary, isn’t it? Possibly PTSD flashback level scary, if Mike had remembered that important aspect of Asami’s history. Yet this is not brought up, and it doesn’t seem to inform Asami’s character at all despite the fact that it should probably be the second thing that comes out of her mouth when she discusses the encounter with Korra.

But wait, it happens again with Tokuga, who just ransacks her place, which just makes it worse. It’d be bad enough not to have Asami explicate this connection the first time around, because she could be bottling her emotions (she does that), and we find out about this later, but to do it twice in the same graphic novel? In quick succession? Yeah, Mike just plum forgot.

I don’t think I need to explain further why being lazy with a canon that you yourself poured your blood, sweat and tears into is not a great look. But that’s what the story Mike wrote is saying.

So, yeah, those are most of my issues with Turf Wars Part 2. Thanks for reading through to the end!

Other random thoughts on how none of this makes sense:

Why does Republic City have Kuvira’s military armaments in a warehouse? Even if the war is somehow over, which it can’t be because that’s not how anything works, it’s still Earth Empire property.

Why do any of those mecha-suits even work after Varrick’s EMP?

Why is Ba Sing Se offering relief efforts when that’s the capital of the country that just invaded the United Republic— seriously they’re still at war you guys you can’t just capture the enemy commander and win

How does Tokuga’s half-spirit form allow him to control spirits? Wouldn’t that make them hate him more?

Why do the triads agree to work under him when all he’s got is a tentacle arm? They could just set him on fire and be done with it

What is the point of Keum, like, at all? Why does he even exist? He got kidnapped at the end of Part 1, but we have no emotional stake in his existence

Why are Mako and Bolin relearning how to value one another’s different skill sets? This is like the fifth time or something

[reactingtosomething]

Reacting to Friends from College

I Write and I’m Never Sad

The Setup: It’s a dream comedy cast. Keegan-Michael Key and Cobie Smulders lead the ensemble, Fred Savage does cocaine, and guest appearances include Billy Eichner playing against type and Kate McKinnon playing very much to type. So there was a lot of excitement in our film school cohort about Netflix’s original series Friends from College.

Then it premiered, and, well, maybe you saw the critical response. Like 69 percent of critics, our friend Adam was extremely not impressed. But Marchae, whose default response to comedy is extreme side-eye, loved it. An argument ensued in the group video messaging app Marco Polo (which we heartily endorse), and Marchae threw down the Guest Reactor gauntlet, so here we are.

Post-chat notes from Kris (who was somewhere in between, but closer to Adam) are in italics.

SPOILERS for the entire first season of Friends from College after the jump.

MARCHAE: So I know you had strong opinions about Friends from College.

And I guess we can start there

ADAM: That would be a bit of an understatement. I would like to know your opinion first. I need to see if I’m missing something.

MARCHAE:  Well I really LOVED it. I thought it was smart 

HILARIOUS 

And I was delighted to see people kind of stuck in the throws of yesteryear while simultaneously trying to move forward and be productive

I also liked that it doesn't matter how adult you think you are you're always trapped somewhere between 13 and 23

ADAM: But here’s the thing

These are a bunch of affluent people that are afraid that they aren’t as cool as they think they are.

Just a bunch of

Can I swear on here?

MARCHAE: You may 

That almost didn't bother me because they are so flawed

ADAM: But they aren’t flawed in an empathetic way

The audience does not have to sympathize with them, but they should at least have some sort of empathy for what is going on in their life.

Not to mention the complete tonal shifts that occur throughout the season

MARCHAE: Ok time out. I did feel bad for them sooo often 

Infertility 

A failing marriage 

Failing career and sexual harassment at work 

AWFUL 

and it's a dramedy 

I appreciated the antics 

And I DO NOT generally appreciate comedies very much 

So hats all the way off and in the air for Friends from College

KRIS: Marchae’s case here has been that because she doesn’t like comedies, anything that makes her laugh must be EXTRA funny. But I think this is faulty reasoning, and that if you are a fan of things Marchae does not find funny, you are likely not be a fan of the things she does.

The golden exception here, of course, is Sweet/Vicious, which she rightly adores.

ADAM: When whats her face [Sam] was at therapy talking about how she wants to blow her life, THEN turns around and says, “No don’t wreck my life.”

[SPOILERS coming for I guess the first like five minutes of the show]

To Keagan Michael Key [Ethan] when he wants to come clean about the affair makes me angry

MARCHAE: Sam and Ethan 

But I think it's supposed to make you kind of angry 

But you know they are miserable 

It's kind of like the payment they get for having, excuse my language, dicked their partners around

ADAM: The creators watched shows like Casual, Difficult People, You’re the Worst, Girls and tried to replicate that form. They are doing it because they think people want unlikeable characters.

MARCHAE: Simultaneously it's kind of a tragic love story 

I don't find them entirely unlikable though

ADAM: A show like You’re The Worst has terrible fucking people in it, but when everything boils down to the core there is some humanity in them.

With Friends From College these characters are just plain terrible trying to justify that they aren’t terrible.

K: Caroline Framke at Vox called it a bad show about worse people

MARCHAE: I don't think they are terrible!!!! 

Lisa isn't

Tell me how Lisa is terrible?!?!

K: I will agree I don’t actually think Lisa is terrible, or at least unlike the others she’s never actively insufferable

They are all kind of midlife crisis

ADAM: Which one is Lisa again?

MARCHAE: Married to Ethan (Keegan Key)

ADAM: She sleeps cheats on her husband

MARCHAE: *Sighs*

She explains why and of those cheating she actually has the "most justifiable" reason

K: She does immediately regret it and almost-immediately come clean, and Ethan takes the opportunity to be Generously Forgiving instead of coming clean like he’d planned, which makes him King Asshole

ADAM: She forces Ethan to break into a pharmacy

MARCHAE: Because SHE WANTS A BABY

K: This is one of the only storylines I like, because it lets Smulders do some actually great dramatic acting. But I wouldn’t even call it an arc, because it never feels resolved so much as dropped halfway through the season.

ADAM: And ruins Felix’s birthday surprise

MARCHAE: and it's funny

ADAM: So what

MARCHAE: I think it is a study in the absurdity of being privileged 

They do whatever they want 

And have minimal consequences until there are consequences 

While the show comments to that it does so using HUMOR 

So I personally feel like you should have laughed

Hard

And often

ADAM: It’s privileged assholes with a token black friend

K: Hey now, they also have an Asian friend. Who arguably feels more like a token than Ethan. 

But I don’t know that I’d charge the show with tokenism; or at least, the cross-section feels pretty familiar to me, as Expensive New England Liberal Arts College demographics go.

MARCHAE: (Ok you have a point there) 

Ethan also notes that in one episode by making a remark about what black men can't do

I really think it's a social commentary

ADAM: Social commentary on what

MARCHAE: The fact that privileged people can do whatever they want with few repercussions and that their problems are clearly as the kids say #firstworld 

I mean come on 

These people know all the right people they aren't terribly efficient or socially prepared to be in the world yet they all make it 

And that's how the world works 

And I think the show knows it

K: But how is it a commentary? It shows privilege, but that’s not the same thing.

ADAM: I wouldn’t say they make it. When it’s handed to them

MARCHAE: No they are all surviving and thriving there 

Sam has her fancy job 

I still don't entirely know what she does (I have to rewatch) 

K: I think she sells furniture?

Nick is a trust fund baby 

AND THEY ALL WENT TO HARVARD

K: But the creators/showrunners also went to Harvard, and no one in the show is anything but affectionate about it, and I never get critique vibes at all as opposed to maybe some self-congratulatory vibes. Which would be totally fine! If the show was better.

ADAM: There is no true arc to these characters either

MARCHAE: it's great they're lives suck and they have it all 

DONT EVEN 

they dooooo

(Well some of them)

Explain though

ADAM: Sam wants to keep her perfect life does not feel guilty about cheating

Fred Savage just keeps doing what he is doing even after his partner (the only good thing about the show) leaves him

Nat Faxon floats in and out of episodes to be a comedic partner for Colby Smulders

K: And the main ostensible arc, of Ethan and Sam reckoning with their affair, is very deliberately not resolved, in a weirdly abrupt series ending

MARCHAE: I beg to differ we do see Sam finally realize she's wrong -and Max (Savage) does change a bit and we see the evolution of him kind of realizing: wait these folks might be ruining my life 

Nat’s character I WILL give you

ADAM: He NEVER realizes that

MARCHAE: He doooeeeessssssss

He does we know he does he says it all when he's drunk 

And also admits he might have a crush on Ethan

ADAM: He threw a temper tantrum at the end when they weren’t doing the bill Clinton musical

MARCHAE: He did and that musical was hilarious 

Admit that much at least

ADAM: We never saw the musical

MARCHAE: We saw a number from it 

Did we watch the same show?

K: Even the show thinks the musical is terrible

ADAM: Clearly not

Can we talk about how the tone always shifts?

MARCHAE: I didn't think so 

But go maybe I'll change my mind I'm flexible

ADAM: The two big stand outs are the wine tasting tour

And the one where they go back to Harvard

The wine tasting tour especially

The let’s get them all drunk and see what happens

K: I agree about the tonal inconsistency, and also particularly hate this episode, except the very end when Felix tells Max the group’s whole deal is pathetic. I want to like this episode because it seems to know that it should be told from Felix’s point of view, but it mostly doesn’t come across that way. It’s just a lot of insufferable antics, with some Lisa angst interspersed.

I think it also with the uneven performance by Keegan Michael Key

The director/creator never really knew how to work with him

At moments he’s just doing impressions and voices that you would see on Key and Peele then he’s this starving unappreciated writer

MARCHAE: The impressions were a personality flaw that they explain in the first or second episode 

K: Lampshading is not the same as justifying! Just because there are some lines about it doesn’t mean it works.

I loved the Harvard episode

K: I wanted to, for reasons that will be obvious to our former classmates, but I feel like they crammed two A-stories in under half an hour and neither Harvard nor the Caymans got enough real-estate

ADAM: They threw Kate McKinnon in there to be this weird YA author

I know that, but he is doing them at weird times

MARCHAE: It's his tick. They call him on it too

I could have honestly done without Kate 

It was weird. I'll give you that one 

K: I didn’t hate it, but I also don't keep up with SNL so maybe my Kate McKinnon oversaturation point is just way different from everyone else’s

His voice impressions were supposed to be anytime he was angry or disagrees with something. I think it added levity to some of the more stressful moments

ADAM: I liked how they poked fun at YA and the twist with Wolf Trials

K: But our readers may appreciate this Mary Sue article defending YA

MARCHAE: HA!

MARCHAE: but i feel like there was so much to like there

ADAM: Here’s a question: In two parts. Sam and Ethan got together when they were Freshmen right?

MARCHAE: yup i think so ( I feel like now I have the PLEASURE of going back to rewatch)

ADAM: Ethan and Lisa got together when he was a Senior and she was Freshmen

MARCHAE: yeah

ADAM: Sam explains they kept having these flings why didn’t they just stay together?

MARCHAE: I honestly thought the same thing - however, I assumed it was because she said whenever they are together she makes poor choices

ADAM: I mean shit, he carved their initials into his dorm wall

MARCHAE: RIGHT!

I will say I questioned the same thing many many many many times and if it was anything that bugged me that was kind of it

ADAM: Smart thing to do is that they never got together in college and are now doing it

MARCHAE: AGREED on that front

ADAM: That speaks to the unevenness of the story

MARCHAE: I think I explained it kind of like they are magnetic for each other ( I don’t necessarily mean it romantically though)

K: Does the show ever really sell this? I don’t think it gives Annie Parisse enough to work with as Sam.

ADAM: They NEVER explain why they didn’t just stay together

MARCHAE: they can’t not be together. Although I probably assigned more of a narrative to the relationship than the show provided

ADAM: its possible because the creators did not. It seems like a pretty big plot device to really overlook

MARCHAE: I think we are supposed to assume that they were each others one who got away yet never got away because they are all still very much good friends?

K: We shouldn’t have to assume!

ADAM: Also, if he writes these critical acclaimed books why is he so sad?

MARCHAE: CAUSE WRITING IS SAD

You know this

I know this!

ADAM: i write and I’m never sad

K: Wait what

MARCHAE: LOL

I think it’s been awhile since his last well received publication. he’s in a bit of a dry spell is how I read it…

(I feel like you’re making me question what I liked about this show?!?!?!)

(Suddenly I’m like wait a minute?)

ADAM: isn’t that the point?

I took it that he is coming off of another critically acclaimed novel that no one is buying because print is dead, and he’s pissed because he wants Harry Potter money

MARCHAE: I totally didn’t get that at all! I thought he didn’t want to be like that at all... he’s into Literature and Max knows that that’s where the money is and Max’s reputation is on the line as well. I think that Ethan would be happy writing his broody novels featuring a teen

ADAM: Ok I would say that it is Max pulling the strings on that

If I had several books that many critics loved I would be happy because I know that it will live on through the ages and be taught in freshmen lit classes

K: I grant this given the additional condition that Ethan is obviously not hurting for money, whether it’s because of his own sales or because of Lisa’s career. But if I had only critical acclaim and had trouble supporting myself I would not be happy

It goes back to my argument of these are not interesting people

Just because they’re dicks does not make them interesting

K: EXACTLY. It’s not good enough in prestige drama, and it’s definitely not good enough in a comedy that wants to be feel-good at least some of the time.

MARCHAE: I think he had two... and when you have some fame you always want more

THEY ARE INTERESTING. don’t you want to know the answers to all of the questions you’ve posed? Why did Sam and Ethan just not stay together?

K: The show should have answered all these questions by the end of the season, because they’re mostly not plot mysteries, they’re essential to character motivation.

ADAM: I don’t think it will get a second season

MARCHAE: What happens with Felix and Max?

IT BETTER!!!! I legitimately thought it was hilarious

it reminded me of Melvin Goes to Dinner

ADAM: I haven’t seen Melvin Goes to Dinner so I cannot relate

MARCHAE: Watch it..it’s a great little indie flick

ADAM: I will

MARCHAE: So what did you like about it

ADAM: Can I say one more thing about the non interesting part then I will say what I liked about it.

MARCHAE: go for it

ADAM: These are white collar people, living in upper crust urban areas, with country houses worrying about how they can keep their upper crust life when they are the ones who put themselves in this situation

MARCHAE: and it’s all falling apart (also Ethan and Sam Lisa are living on Marianne’s couch)

ADAM: meh. I will say this:

MARCHAE: MEH! ADAM come on!!!

ADAM: Even though I had my thoughts on Lisa she is the most interesting person on that show

K: YES

MARCHAE: BOOM!!!

I like Sam too. I think she’s the most complicated character

ADAM: Well and Felix because Billy Eichner plays a great straight man

She’s the most real

Billy Eichner does a great straight man which is different from his normal routine.

Nat Faxon has the best one liners. But I think that is Nat Faxon and not the writers

K: Everyone should watch the short-lived Ben and Kate, also starring a pre-50 Shades Dakota Johnson. But I think Marianne had the best one-liners.

Because Nat Faxon is actually a talented writer

K: With director Alexander Payne and fellow comedy actor Jim Rash, Faxon won a Best Adapted Screenplay Oscar for The Descendants.

That’s all I somewhat enjoyed, but that’s not enough when the show clearly hinges on Ethan and Sam.

MARCHAE: WOW!

I thought that Sam was great. I liked not knowing what the heck had happened at some points... think about it

when we meet people we only know what we know about them from that moment forward - anything else is their retelling of it - so it was nice to not know and try to figure it out

ADAM: Not knowing what?

What are we not knowing?

MARCHAE: I think Sam’s psychology as well as the how and why she and Ethan stayed together

ADAM: She has no problem fucking around and screwing over Lisa when she knows Ethan and Lisa are trying to conceive

MARCHAE: No that doesn’t make her likable but it does make her complicated

ADAM: Plus she would rather cheat on her husband, who all accounts loves and adores her, he threw her that amazing birthday party, than have Ethan say something and ruin her life

MARCHAE: (btw I think what she did was WRONG on so many levels and I wanted to fight her...she was selfish and needed to be punched and I was sad Lisa never did it)

ADAM: She would just rather ruin everyone else’s life

MARCHAE: I think her husband loves the idea of her and her family but she is selfish that makes her complicated

ADAM: She’s not complicated

She’s spoiled

MARCHAE: But I think she might be there has to be something going on that makes a person say hey I know I make bad choices when I am with person X 

and engage in illicit behavior but I am going to keep doing it

I found myself the whole show trying to figure her out

K: I don’t think this is to the show’s credit, though, I think it’s evidence that the show fails to flesh her out or make her internally coherent.

ADAM: I just kept yelling at her

She deserves NOTHING!

MARCHAE: Oh my god! But that’s what I mean we don’t know how she got there

ADAM: Yes we do

She couldn’t/wouldn’t be with Ethan so she married a rich guy, but still realized that she wanted Ethan and would sleep with him every time she visited.

MARCHAE: LOLOL

ADAM: Then instead of breaking things off when Ethan moved to NY she kept at it

MARCHAE: But we don’t know WHY she couldn’t or wouldn’t, which is the FUN of the character but tried to get help

ADAM: But she does not want her privileged life to go away and still wants to fuck around

MARCHAE: but like I said they are magnetic for each other

she doesn’t want to lose her kids

K: But Sam just keeps saying this, and we don’t ever see her interact with her kids in a meaningful way -- even in the Harvard episode, which would’ve been great for that -- or see how incredible the life is that she would lose. It’s the opposite of Show Don’t Tell! But also, if they actually showed her incredible life, she’d be even harder to empathize with.

ADAM: I don’t care for the why on that deep of a level

MARCHAE: she’d still be very much privileged

and I think that’s kind of the cool thing,  cool being relative,  is that it is going to implode on them. And it’s going to be epic when it does. And we will watch and laugh

ADAM: Doubtful because I don’t think it will get renewed

MARCHAE: SMH

ADAM: https://www.rottentomatoes.com/tv/friends_from_college/s01/

http://www.refinery29.com/2017/07/163100/friends-from-college-ethan-sam-cheating-infidelity-

MARCHAE: AUDIENCE SCORE 55%!!!

ADAM: That’s an F

MARCHAE: see that’s the problem - don’t base your opinion on the critics

that’s over half and there are a lot of things that win with just over half

ADAM: I’m not

MARCHAE: LOTS

ADAM: I watched it

MARCHAE: *sighs*  look I am onboard to stick around next season and I feel like in that season they will explore some of the why’s that we need in order to feel more “complete” if you will

K: THEY SHOULD TELL A COMPLETE STORY IN ONE SEASON

ADAM: I’ll watch it see the train wreck that it will be. IF they bring it back

MARCHAE: They WILL bring it back and you and I will be right back here AGAIN.

Anything else you want to mention about how much you LOVED the show?

ADAM: If you want, I can include all the reviews that agree with me that hate it

Ok you asked what I liked. What didn’t you like?

MARCHAE: that would be hilarious. Do it

Well I thought it was hilarious for one thing. just the sheer level of immaturity

I also appreciated seeing folks questioning their lives at this age

ADAM: I think that’s a played out trope

MARCHAE: in theory they are “supposed to” have it all together and they don’t

I think we see it in movies like Sisters or what’s the one with the guys

the man gets a face tat 

K: The Hangover? 2, maybe?

but I don’t think we see it with a group of people just trying to be somewhat functional and live their lives

Sam Lisa and Ethan are for all practical purposes homeless

we don’t know why they have enough money for IVF but can’t buy a house but who cares

K: ME

they are a hot mess

and i think that’s what I appreciated is that it was a hot mess

and your clothes can look nice

and your job be great and you are still at the end of the day unhappy and wanting more

and you are fumbling to figure out how to get to that point

and that you do it at 20, 30, 40 and they’ll still be at it at 50 or 60

that no one is actualized enough to be transparent enough to say: YOU MAKE ME UNHAPPY. but we fall into this routine of doing things because we are supposed to...they are supposed to be friends

supposed to marry the guy with all the money

supposed to have kids

and it’s all crumbling because they are ultimately toxic for one another

that’s fun to watch!

K: This is a very eloquent case for the show in theory, but I just don’t see it in practice. I think you’re doing a lot of the heavy lifting for the show. I’m glad it works for you, but I don’t think that’s how madcap ensemble comedies are supposed to function.

ADAM: This whole I’m turning 40 mid life crisis thing does not entertain me.

Especially when you have these well off people. It’s like the Breakfast Club. I hate that movie

A bunch of whiny teens with no real problems, other than Bender.

MARCHAE: but those are kids.  watching adults still fumble isn’t terrible to me especially those who are doing the most

(Also i thought it was HILARIOUS)

ADAM: Wait did you think it was hilarious?

MARCHAE: The whole thing!

I thought it was witty. There were literally points where I laughed out loud

The vineyard

The brainstorm at Max and Felix’s

The throwing of the chair though the pharmacy

ADAM: That is the directors asking Ethan to do Key and Peele shit

MARCHAE: it’s funny though

K: I hated all of these things because they’re just free-standing slapstick sequences, and didn’t feel motivated by the story.

now to speak to some of the things you didn’t like

I would have liked a bit more drama

(but I prefer drama to comedy 7 out of 7 days of the week...)

I also wanted more backstory somehow about WHY these people are still friends

so I don’t think it was perfect

but it was easily one of the better things I’ve watch for a comedy in a while

barring like Insecure

ADAM: That seems like a pretty big concern

MARCHAE: I can usually forgive it if the characters are interesting...WHICH THEY WERE

and I think we will be explained more of that in SEASON 2!

ADAM: I don’t have faith in that

MARCHAE: 😟

Do you have anything else you want to add about this show that you ...er... love so much 😊  

(Also I swear if it gets a season 2 we. will. react.)

K: I actually will not be surprised if it gets a second season, assuming the cast is in. It doesn’t seem cheap to shoot but it’s also relatively limited in its locations.

ADAM: I swear to react IF it gets a second season

MARCHAE: YES!!!

ADAM: I don’t think I have really anything else to say about these boring people

K: And you guys never even touched on Marianne, Jae Suh Park’s character. Maybe because she’s barely a character. Park gave killer readings to her one-liners (“Has it ever worked?” “Not to my knowledge.”), and I personally would love to see her in more things. But every time it seemed like she might have an actual story, it fizzled out pretty much immediately. Plus a lot of her New Agey GOOP bullshit seems like it should’ve come from an insufferable white lady, not the show’s only Asian character.

MARCHAE: had to get one last dig in didn’t ya? 

Well I say this has been a joy!!!

ADAM: It really has

Maybe next time we can react to something we agree on...

Like Die Hard

MARCHAE: YESSSSS!!!!!!

Let’s plan for this!

ADAM: Whenever wherever

Kris was agitating for a Marchae-Adam Die Hard reaction even before Friends from College came up, and would endorse an ongoing Marchae and Adam React to the 80s series. Expect to see more from Adam in the not-too-distant future! And we have yet another excellent Guest Reactor on deck, so you might want to brush up on your X-Men cartoons...

In the meantime, you can follow us on Twitter, where Kris retweets a lot of critics, screenwriters, and actors in between posting Reactions.