#I cannot stress how much of a joke this is

[vanesycho]

Are you able to do a soft thoughts f!reader x Johnny? 🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹 when you get the chance. No rush I promise.

I love soft Johnny so much😭 he is a very huggable person😔 thank you for your request🤍🤍

Soft thoughts about Johnny ˘͈ᵕ˘͈

ღJohnny is someone who warms up everyone around him with his big smile. Just his looks can put you at ease. When he is with you, you can be sure that he will make the day brighter with his jokes and thoughtful thoughts. The size of his hands and his warm touches make you feel safe, just like a blanket you wrap yourself in on a cold day.

ღHis laughter is contagious. He can make you laugh heartily even on the worst day when he is with you. He has a voice that seems to take away all your stress. When you are on a long walk with him, watching the clouds in the sky and having a slow conversation, everything feels calmer and more peaceful.

ღHe is someone you will always feel comfortable with. If you are someone who is shy to go out in public, Johnny is perfect for that. He always makes you fit in, makes you feel comfortable. He notices when you are uncomfortable in a place and makes you have a better time alone.

ღHis hugs can be the best thing in the world. He always makes you feel warm. He does not hesitate to wrap his arms around you tightly, and although he is afraid of hurting you by squeezing too hard, he cannot control himself. Especially if you are going through a bad time, his warm hugs can make you forget everything.

ღHe loves to cook, if he wakes up earlier than you in the morning, you can find him in the kitchen already. He will give you a warm smile, approach you, kiss your forehead and hug you. He will whisper in your ear with his calm voice "Good morning baby, did you sleep well? I am preparing you the best breakfast you will ever eat, just wait a little bit."

ღI don't know why but he seems like someone who sings for no reason. When he comes in, he will hum a song and then his voice will rise, if you join him he will reach out his hand and make you do a little dance show. Finally he will pull you to him and kiss you on the lips and end your little concert with that.

As the song ended, Johnny looked into your eyes and kissed you romantically. His kisses were like the last note of the song, sweetly completing the moment. "That was the best part of the song."

ღHe seems like the kind of person who will tell you ridiculous stories before going to bed. Sometimes he will tell you the story of how you two met as a love story and you listen to it with a smile on your face every time "And that was the day the eternal love of the two main characters began..." when he realizes you are asleep halfway through the story he will give you a light kiss and mumble goodnight. But sometimes he can tell you the most ridiculous thing in the world, like a story about aliens and dinosaurs fighting.

"One day, the dinosaur commander, a T-Rex, targeted the aliens' base using a huge laser gun." You listened to him, unable to hold back your laughter. "...And just like that, the dinosaurs and the aliens never fought again. Because now both sides knew how bad ice cream was."

ღHe is good with words. He can give you the best advice and compliments, makes you feel better with small touches. He never hesitates to show his love, even if he doesn't say words of love to you, you can tell everything from the look in his eyes. The brightness of his eyes, the small smile on his lips, the small nods that show he listens to every word.

ღHe's really good at flirting. At first you thought he was a playboy but you realized he only acts like that because he really loves you, he doesn't talk to anyone else like that. He squeezes in some flirty sentences while talking and then continues talking as if nothing happened, leaving you surprised.

As he walks around the library with you, he looks at you who you were excitedly looking for the book you love. “You’re so cute, these books must make you feel excited, just like I feel when I'm with you you.” You looked at him in surprise, but he picked up a book without even looking at you. “Oh look, here’s the book you’re looking for. Let’s go, I’ll buy it for you.”

[valscodblog]

Office Workers John Price x Reader

Warnings: 18+ MINORS, BE GONE OR BE BLOCKED! I will be checking the blogs who like this post. THIS IS VERY MDNI! I REPEAT MDNI! Why, you ask? Drinking, smoking, cheater!Simon, Bully!Gaz, Lapdog!Soap, and CEO!Price, SMUT SMUT SMUTTY SMUT!, cheating (Obvi-Simon), vulgar language, and adult jokes. It legit starts off with you fucking Simon. MINORS BE GONE FOR THIS ONE BRO. Cannot stress it enough. Also, GHOAP!

SUMMONING!!!!: @seconds-over-first @thebunnednun @writing-with-moss @skauni @needa-sum-luvn @m-1-l-0 @staytrueblue and @karlachismylife <333

and Yes. I gave Soap his '09 scar. IT LOOKED SO HOT OKAY? WHAT AM I TO DO? IM JUST A GIRL!!!

"Si-Simon, fuck!" you gasped, your mouth wide open. Simon laughed silently as he looked up at you, he tilited the driver's seat back via the hande bar on the side of the seat, near the base, and smiled up at you. But his smile wasn't at all nice-no no. It was mean and ignorant. He knew what kind of trouble you two would get into, he didn't mind getting into to trouble himself, he always smooth talked himself out of it, but you on the other hand...you never liked trouble. Not unless it was fun trouble. Which, when Price found out about you and Simon, it wouldn't be. And knowing Price, he'd find out. "Can't-Fuck-Can't wait ter see yer pretty arse in trouble!" Simon gloated, for some reason-he always liked seeing other's below him in some sort of trouble. He didn't know why but he just did.

That's was how your night went last night. Crazy-first day on the job and you ended up fucking your manager. Wow. Good job, Me, you scolded yourself, as you sorted through papers on your cubicle's desk. Your neighbor stood up and man was he tall. Simon had called him the Boss' lapdog-he didn't look it...What with the scar in his eye and all 'round rough appearance.

"Aye, Bonnie! 'Ow was the date?" He asked, in his heavy Scottish drawl. You smiled and said, "It was rather nice, truth be told...Simon's a bit brash, but he's pretty good with woman, surprisingly." He smiled and said, "You call the ol' Ghost, Simon, now, aye?" he teased, walking over to you. You nodded and said, "He told me to." he gave you a low whistle and smirked. "But be lucky, Bonnie. The only one allowed ter call 'em that is Me-his Husband."

And that warm smile disappeared. You looked him dead in the eyes and asked, "What?" stupidly. He looked down at you, his lips pressed into a thin white line. "Sure, it's not the first time he's cheated...but it is the first with a Woman...makes me question some things..." he gurmbled as he stared down at you, you, being you, stayed sat in your chair and gulped. "If it makes it better-he told me-"

"That i wuz single. Aye, Love. 'Ello, Y/n," Simon said walking over, her pressed a kiss to his supposed husband's forehead, and you swear you could see tears in your work-partner's eyes. "Wuz jus' sum fun, Soap. 'S all, Baby." "Just some fun? Really, Simon?" Soap, you guessed his nickname was, said through his teeth, you gulped again. "You cheated on may-with a fuckin' rookie! And a Girl nonetheless, ye bastard!"

You stood up and said, "Look, I'm so sorry, Sir. If I had known that-" "Naw, I don't blame ye, Bonnie! I blame tha' ol' Bastard right there." and he jerked his thumb in the direction of Simon. You sighed and then Gaz, the old asstant of the CEO's came out of his room and said, "The boss wants to see you, Y/n. I dunno why, so don't ask."

You swear you and everyone around you could hear your heart drop. You walked over to your CEO's office-the only time you ever saw him was when you were being interviewed by Laswell. He had walked in to ask her something, forgetting that she had you on the schedule. You knocked on the door and it opened so you poked your head in.

"Sir-you called?"

"I did. Come in, Y/n."

"Yes, Sir."

if only you knew how much you affected him. He only ever saw you one time-but fuck you were...captivating. He tensed slightly and then said, "Call me, John." to which you nodded. "Of course...John." Huh...sounded pretty coming from your mouth...wonder what else would.

"So...your new, you don't know much of well...anything, Love, so I'll give you the run down."

you gulped, "If i may ask before we start sir, what did i do wrong?" "Oh its not what you did wrong! It's what one of my...lowers did wrong, more so." "Oh..." "But you too are...semi at fault here-you entertained a certain...thought. Even acted upon it with a certain, Simon Riley?" you quirked a brow up. "Yeah...i went a date-" "Well let me tell you-you missed work with the excuse that you were sick...lying to me isn't a good idea, swee'eart." you gulped. "Uhm...I uhh, didn't call off, Sir-" "Oh really? I hope you know we, for legal reasons, record every phone call we get at this company, Y/n."

you were in huge trouble...You knew it. John looked up at you from where he was sitting and said, "I don't approve of Simon's ungodly habits. Never have-never will. But you, poor you, really...you didn't know he was married. Went to the wedding m'self. Wasn't big but it was nice," he listed off to you, you nodded. "Sit down, sit down! So sorry i havn't asked you before where are my manners?" He joked as he held his hand out to an empty seat across from him. "You aren't being horribly punished-but you will be punished just ever so slightly, Birdie." You nodded.

You deserved to be. You had helped Simon cheat on Soap. His name tag said, "John" you just now recalled. So, two John's at this office, huh? Wow....pay checks must get mixed up. "Are you listening, Y/n?" "Yes, Sir." "Good. So, you will be under strict supervision now, for about three to four weeks. I'll give you Kyle's old office. He's moved up in the chain now, don't worry. He's just a rank above you....same as John, truth be told." You nodded, "Right...so you'll move me into his old office?" "Yeah, that's right. That alright with you, Love?"

You nodded as butterflies flew into your stomach. You always had liked British nicknames. They gave you a sense of comfort-and turned you on a good amount too...but what you forgot is that the English are very smart too. Very observant, very attentive...John, even more so. He could see the gears in your head turning and then getting stuck up on that nickname, and every other one he called you. He could basically Hear the rate of your heart, and the fact you were blushing only confirmed his theory.

"Good to know you approve, My Dear."

and oh lord, your reaction was priceless. Red face, struggling o keep composure...poor thing. One single little nickname sent all of your hormones rushing to your cunt as if it hadn't been fucked the night before.

[stgosupremacy]

Hi so this is me ranting about Ash being Goh's n01 supporter in project mew 😍 (as he always is ofc)

"I wanna join. Project Mew! For sure!"

love that cute sneaky side view

"You know what? I'm gonna cheer you on with all my might!"

the way he said you sounded a bit like it was a thank you for goh always cheering on ash during his battles 🥺 (it also sounds like I'm analysing too much again looooooooollllllllllll)

I always thought this was Ash just being dead supportive to Goh like he always is but he meant this so much 😭😭😭💗

"You're coming too, Ash?" (the hand on goh's shoulder omg and ash looks so cute idfjkmf)

"I promised I'd always cheer you on, didnt I?"

everyone smiling around them lol (they so know whats going on)

"I'll clear the mission for sure!"

"That's the spirit, Goh!" (always so supportive 🥺💖)

STOP HE'S SO HAPPY TO BE ALLOWED TO GO WITH GOHH AW 🥺

"You failed. You'd be toast if I hadn't saved you."

"Wait just a second, what are you talking about failed!?"

i love how as soon as ash sees goh's sad face he gets his protective boyfriend mode activated 🥰🥰🥺

"Good for you, Goh! I'm fired up about this too!"

i am so tempted to make a post on how touchy these guys are bc oh my god they are so touchy 💀💀 and hellllllll ash was not lying at all about being fired up about project mew, the entire trial period it was almost like ash was taking the missions, bless him 💖😂

"I'll help any way I can!"

it's so sweet to me ash constantly reminds gohof this fact <3

look at danika leaning in the back guys she knows

god ive talked ab this episode far too recently to rant about it here but 🥺😂

"You can count on us! Dont let it win!"

🥰the way ash looks at him

"Plus, I'll be there, you'll be fine!"

no words from me just pure SUPPPPPPPPPPPORTTTTTTTTTT is radiating here (and also goh looking like he's crushing bad)

"Only the challenger is allowed in this mission."

"You've gotta be kidding!"

bless the way he seems so fed up when danika says he cant come- LIKE CMON CAN THEY GET ANY CUTER??? 😭

but as soon as goh says this.....

"No worries Ash, I'm sure i'll be succesful!" (his smile is so sweet)

"You're right Goh, just make sure to pass that mission!"

...Then ash is totally supportive of it if Goh's fine with it too 💗

"Right?" 🥰

"Right!"

yeah....sorry i had to include that it was so cute

"Goh!"

"Dankia, did you do this on purpose!?" the way ash is so stressed for goh for literally no reason but his safety, enter: PROTECTIVE BOYFRIEND MODE ACTIVATED AGAIN WOOOOOOO

HE LOOKS SO SAD WHEN GOH DOESNT GET ANY TOKENS STOPPP 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

the way ash is looking at him so intently...i cannot 💀💀💀💀💀

"This time I'm going by myself."

"WHAT? HOW COME?" 😨😨 (that literally deserves to be in caps because he indeed shouted it lol ) he sounds so in disbelief, it's so sweet he just sees going along with Goh everywhere now his second nature 😭💙💙💙

but after goh explaining why, then ash just smiles and wishes goh the best of luck (as he always does bc he's just happy goh is happy)

like

why is this boy so precious

"I made it through!" I SEE THAT BLUSH HEAJDKAJ (it was obviously from excitement but blushing goh is quite rare in ultimate jrnys and he looks too cute when he does it) 😂

"No joke?! Congratulations Goh!"

YAYYYY HES SO HAPPY 4 HIM 🤗🤗

"Thanks to you, Ash!" 🥰🥺💖

"Thanks to all of your hard work!" STOPP LIKE the way how he tries to deflect the praise back onto goh makes me smile every time but yk so does this entire scene at this point

right the way goh ends the call and breathes out as soon as he does is definetelyy not gay at all 🤨🤨🤨 (fr tho they make each other so happy and i'm always living for it....if you havent noticed)

...right i should stop thats enough for today

[gambleputty]

See it’s not gay for 2 tgirls to be nuzzling each other, that’s just the magnets in their heads

[skybristle]

/JOKE

[aromantic-diaries]

My favorite argument against literally anything like "it's not natural" or something along those lines is simply I Don't Care

[sky-scribbles]

What is Essek's Wisdom score?

(aka, a totally unnecessary ramble about one drow and his dnd mechanics by me, a tumblr user who should be asleep)

Last episode, we got a rare hint about Essek’s Wisdom score, in the form of Fearne’s attempt to sneak a look at his feet while he slept. Whatever Essek’s passive perception is, it was ‘just enough’ to catch Fearne, with her Sleight of Hand check of 9. I made a joke about this giving Essek a pretty low Wisdom score, and several people pointed out that because Matt halves his characters’ passive perceptions when they’re sleeping, Essek’s Wisdom would actually be around the 18-20 mark. But this… might not necessarily be the case.

Now, I did honestly mean that post as a joke and not any actual theorising on Essek’s mechanics, but since people got me thinking, let’s crunch some numbers! (Huge thanks to the folks over on the Essek discord for helping me with the maths here! Also, disclaimer that all of this could be disproven next episode, and I am fine with that. I enjoy doing dnd maths anyway, because I am a nerd.)

So: if Matt remembered the house rule about halving the passive perception while a character sleeps (and he doesn’t always), this would give Essek a passive of 18-20. But does this mean his Wisdom is 18-20? Actually, no! For a start, if he had no other bonuses to perception (and I’ll get to that in a second), this would give Essek a bonus of +4 or +5, which would make his awake passive just 14-15, and his sleeping passive 7. Not enough to catch Fearne. But: it might well be the case that Essek simply has Perception proficiency, in which case, he wouldn’t need a Wisdom of 18+.

While Essek, being an NPC, obviously doesn’t conform to PC rules, it’s worth bearing in mind that all elf PCs get perception proficiency for free from their Keen Senses trait. Perception would therefore be a pretty reasonable proficiency for Essek to have, even if it didn’t make sense from a character perspective – which it does. He is, after all, constantly having to look over his shoulder for assassins (and even before he was, having a keen eye out for trouble would be a useful asset in his former courtly intrigues.)

So what does this mean for his passive perception? Well, he appears to be the equivalent of a level 17-20 wizard, if his use of a ninth-level spell slot is anything to go by. With the caveat that he doesn’t have to use player rules (just attach that caveat to, uh… everything I say in this post) that would give him a + 6 proficiency bonus. If this is true, then all Essek needs for a waking passive perception of 18 is actually a Wisdom modifier of just +2, i.e. a Wisdom score of 14 or 15. (A baseline of 10, plus 2 from his Wisdom, plus 6 from proficiency). This would allow his halved passive to be at least 9, and let him catch Fearne in her sneaky feat of feet-peeking. If we make his Wisdom any higher than this, I don’t think we can qualify Matt’s ‘just enough’ statement.

But wait! There are more options! Unlikely ones, but options worth bearing in mind, nonetheless. We know Matt is on board with giving his allied NPCs feats; indeed, Essek himself has the War Caster feat. So it’s entirely possible that he might also have the observant feat. This would be a very logical choice from a roleplaying perspective considering Essek’s current status as a fugitive.

Having this feat would add +5 to his passive perception. Let’s say Essek has no Wisdom bonus at all, but has this feat and is proficient in perception. In this case, his passive while awake is 21 (a baseline of 10, plus 5 from Observant, plus 6 from profiency). That's a sleeping passive of 10: just enough to catch Fearne in the act. We could actually dump his Wisdom into the negative and he'd still be able to just barely notice her.

If you shook me and asked me to tell you what I actually think Essek’s Wisdom is, I’d guess at his Wis being at that ~14 mark I pitched earlier. I think this would make sense from what we’ve seen of him – yes, he has done some completely dumbass things, but he’s shown a level of self-reflection and self-awareness, especially after his redemption arc kicked off, that I think a Wisdom of about this number is justified. I wouldn't be surprised to find it was lower or higher, though; Wisdom is a wibbly stat to define at the best of times and you can make a case for Essek being just about anywhere on the number scale.

A stat of ~14 also works for me from a character construction perspective: we already know he has an Intelligence of around 22, and a decent Charisma; back in campaign 2, the Nein regularly had to roll Insight checks of 20+ to see through him, indicating a high Deception. So I’m hesitant to pitch his Wisdom too high; this might just be my own personal preference as a DM, but I’d be unlikely to roll up an NPC ally with high numbers in all three mental stats. Give ‘em some lower scores to keep things spicy, y’know?

(As a side note, Essek’s Dexterity is a very serviceable 16, and I suspect that his Charisma is at least equal to that. Having scores of 16+ in four stats would be a bit much, imo, even if his Strength and Constitution are probably much, much lower.)

A final point: one thing we can rule out is Matt allowing Essek to use his regular, un-halved Passive while trancing, since he didn’t remember that Essek could trance until Laura reminded him (bless them both), and I’m pretty sure the Fearne incident happened before she did. Though I should say again, considering that Matt can and does forget rules from time to time… it is also true that Matt might’ve just forgotten about halving the passive score. If he did just forgor, this entire ramble is meaningless but oh well.

Tl;dr: we don’t know, but a reasonable guess would be to say that his Wisdom is about 14. I guess I’ll just sit here and hope that Matt may eventually release his statblock (and an explanation of how he made his dad so mad he died. Hi, Matt Mercer, not to beg but please –)

[chekhovstrap]

One of the things that makes me a little 😵‍💫😵‍💫about rhaenicent interactions is that there is always a certain point where everything falls away. The starts are hostile, more bluffing than anything, but it always recedes into fondness. Like the look Rhaenyra gives Alicent when she says “you speak as if from a distant dream” is so achingly tender. All pretenses are gone. Alicent asks Rhaenyra to come with her and Rhaenyra doesn’t scoff. She doesn’t balk or laugh cruelly at the plea. She denies her as kindly as she can and hints that there is a part of her that would if she could. It is INSANE to me how much their love for each other has endured through everything they’ve put each other through.

[nobodysdaydreams]

Giving a complicated tragic childhood backstory to your favorite character is all fun and games, until you realize you need to account for how old all the other adult characters would have been at the time and realize that scenes that would work perfectly if one character was twenty three and the other was fourteen stop working when you need other characters who are played by adult actors clearly younger than they are to be in college at the same time so your story beats line up thematically.

[bugslap]

Trafalgirl Woman D Law

if you click her she gets brighter✨

[oldtvandcomics]

Happy Queer Media Monday!

Today: I Dream In Another Language (2017)

I watched this movie a few weeks ago, and it STUCK.

(Don Evaristo and Don Isauro just before their first interview to record Zikril together.)

I Dream in Another Language is a Mexican magic realism movie about the death of a culture. It documents the efforts of a linguist trying to save the (fictional) language Zikril, spoken only by three old indigenous people. When one of them dies, the studies come to a halt, as the other two, Don Evaristo and Don Isauro, have not spoken to each other in over fifty years and categorically refuse to have anything to do with each other. As he looks further into this, the linguist discovers that the real reason for this feud is their past relationship and an awful lot of internalized homophobia.

Zkril is an artificial language, created specially for this movie out of respect for the people who still speak the endangered and disappearing languages today. The fact that it has seemingly magic powers, and that its speakers appear to be living on after their death, clearly puts the story into the magic realism genre.

This is NOT a happy movie. The internalized homophobia part is no joke, and the main theme of course is the loss of a language, and the culture that comes with it. 

But it damn sure is leaving an emotional impact.

I strongly suggest that everyone who is even vaguely interested in this subject read up about languages and language conservation. The Wikipedia page of this movie is as a good place to start as any, since there are related articles linked in the references list. I also would like to thank @celluloidrainbow for bringing this film to my attention.

Queer Media Monday is an action I started to talk about some important and/or interesting parts of our queer heritage, that people, especially young people who are only just beginning to discover the wealth of stories out there, should be aware of. Please feel free to join in on the fun and make your own posts about things you personally find important!

[anhedoniashoujo]

need to fuck a girl dressed as leyley for halloween or i will kill myself

[astridthevalkyrie]

everything you see ab being the oldest daughter is true btw why am i the family therapist AND punching bag smh

long ass depressing rant in the tags srry i got a wee bit emotional

[goldenliartrash]

.

[breadedsinner]

Solas keeps making the same mistakes despite insisting he knows better. That’s why he is actually a business major.

[pileofpawns]

DNI if you haven’t listened to the entirety of Super Ghostbusters as well as the first three tracks of the deluxe edition /joking