#I can't stop thinking about all the dialogue at the end there .... so well written and so beautiful

[famewolf]

I really said 'this game is my full time job'

my next playthrough I'll be trying to 100% the achievements, but 75% my first run is pretty darn good!

[cuteandhughesy]

Please Please Please | Luke Hughes

summary: navigating a secret relationship with your brothers teammate is turning out to be a little harder than you expected. the 3 times you and luke were almost caught + the 1 time you are caught.

[word count] 4.3k

warnings: MATURE! pre-established relationship | brothers teammate trope | lazar! reader | sneaking around | kissing | suggestive dialogue and scenes | the tiniest sprinkle of smut but no actual sex | read at your own discretion

a/n: formed based on this request! i’m working on a good chunk of fics and similar stuff so keep your eyes open 💕 for now…enjoy! it’s been so long since i’ve written for luke..I missed him.

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one

"we really shouldn't be doing this..." luke's hushed words trail off, whispered against your slick lips as you two move through the room, stumbling over loose shoes and discarded clothes. his hands run up your torso hurriedly—yet smoothly—squeezing your skin in his palms like he can't get enough of you, despite his words. it's a sweet gesture, one that only turns you on further.

you shush him gently, dismissing his hesitance. you pull away from him slightly, but still close enough that you could lean back in at any moment and continue your hurried kiss. "please." you pout slightly, looking up through your lashes. you're so wound up from just kissing luke, you're not sure if you'll be able to stop now—despite the circumstances.

so regardless of your own selflessness—you can understand luke's apprehension. after all, if you were in his shoes you'd probably be shitting bricks right about now. your hands fall away from luke's broad shoulders, letting them trail down his chest until you reach his hips. slowly, you slip your fingers into the waistband of luke's sweats, and begin pulling him forward. "we just have to be really quiet."

luke stumbles slightly, caught off guard by your sudden movements. regardless, he follows easily, allowing you to bring him towards the edge of the bed. in that moment you're thankful the upstairs bedroom floors are carpeted, and the wobbly footsteps are muffled by the rug under your and luke’s socked feet.

the back of your knees meet the edge of the bed, and that has you falling back into the mass of blankets, releasing your hold on the elastic waistband around luke's ridiculously attractive hips—which, before you even met luke, you didn't even think hips could be so hot, but you'd been very quickly proven wrong.

you blink up at luke lazily, making your gaze come across as sensual as possible. you bring your knees up, and slowly your legs part, revealing the thin material off your blueberry printed panties—just visible under your shifted pyjama shorts.

but luke doesn't bite. he stays stagnant at the end of the bed, shirtless and visibly turned on—the straining situation under the soft material of his sweatpants giving him away.

his brows furrow. "what if curtis comes up here." luke questions, the worry evident in his expression. he gently rubs along his growing stubble, deep in thought as he continues to eye you. "what if we get caught?" luke's hesitant eyes flicker towards your closed bedroom door—well, your brother and his wife's guest bedroom door.

you were finishing up your final year of university in jersey, and instead of paying the ridiculous residence fees, curtis offered you the spare bedroom in his families home. and with that came a lot of social situations involving your brothers teammates. whether it was team dinners at different houses, or crowded bars after games, you were there—which is where you met luke.

luke seemed to always be around, and that combined with the constant banter he has with your brother, had you feeling enamoured with the youngest hughes brother very soon after curtis introduced you two. you found yourselves drawn to one another, and if one of you was near, the other wasn't far behind. you and luke quickly started dating—behind the back of your brother of course.

curtis has always been protective of you, especially when it comes to your relationships. it all comes from a good place, even if it made dating extremely difficult for you. curtis has always made sure to drill the negative stigma around young hockey players into your head—how he would never want you to date one...especially if said hockey player was one of his own teammates.

locker room talk was inevitable, and curtis didn't want to subject you to any of that ridiculous stuff or make you uncomfortable. and you didn't mind that protective rule of curtis' because you've never had an attraction to any of his teammates—until luke.

with that in mind, you and luke found yourself involved in a secret relationship. there's many measures you'd both take to ensure your romance stayed under wraps—you'd plan your calls around schedules, allowing yourselves to talk freely without your brother listening in. as well, you and luke would always plan secret dates, giving excuses of seeing friends in the city while you're actually tangled in whoever's bed is free. during gatherings, you'd be sneaking off into dark rooms, kissing like horny teenagers—it was all a thrill, one that you and luke found yourselves growing accustomed to, and honestly preferred.

you and luke were always careful—especially if curtis was around. if your brother was near, you and luke simply wouldn't sneak away, both too worried about getting caught and loosing the excitement and intimacy of your secret life.

but tonight was different.

the devils had been away on a week long road trip, expanding along the west coast and visiting teams like the sharks and kings. with the change in time zones, sneaking calls and facetimes with your boyfriend was practically impossible, and you and luke had only texted every few days to check in.

the interfering schedules and lack of communication left you and luke missing each other more than usual, and as soon as the devils plan landed back on jersey soil, you were practically vibrating with need.

when you proposed the idea of sneaking luke into the house once everyone had gone to bed, you didn't think he'd agree, but surprisingly enough he did. luke was apprehensive at first—which is understandable— because seeing one another while you're brother was home was always a big no-no. but the combination of the time missed between you and your pouty voice, luke had no choice but to agree.

slowly you unfold your leg, lifting your foot until you meet luke's shoulder. you nudge the buff surface with your sock covered toes, pulling luke's attention away from the bedroom door and back to you.

luke's gaze moves over you, shifting from your plump, spit slicked lips, down to your barley covered core and thin tank top that gives him the perfect outline of your pebbled nipples. he swallows roughly, a blush covering his high cheek bones.

"we won't get caught." you whisper seductively, your foot slowly trailing down his arm.

suddenly luke grabs onto your ankle, bringing your foot closer to his face. "you're such a bad influence." luke presses a soft kiss on your exposed ankle, right over the beaded anklet decorating you. his eyes don't leave your face, and as he slowly pulls away, a smirk begins to pull at his lips—tempting you.

you take your lip between your teeth. "you gunna punish me?"

he breathes a laugh, and manoeuvres your leg back into his spread, bent position. "you want me to punish you?"

you watch through hooded eyes as luke crawls onto the bed, moving until he's hovering over your flushed body. instantly your hands are in hair, running through his light curls, feeling the defined pattern between your fingers. "maybe I do."

his eyes flutter closed at the feeling, a small whimper passing through his parted lips. luke's large palm runs up your side, scooping under your tank until he's feeling your bare skin—running his thumb over your nipple.

you arch into him, a breathy moan leaving your lips, goosebumps covering your skin in the wake of luke's gentle touches.

luke kisses you slowly, a deep and bruising pressure that has you tingling all the way down to your toes. your lips part instinctively, moaning into luke's mouth as his continues to kiss yours, lips passing over yours in a gentle, slick embrace.

you're so easily distracted by luke's presence and touch, and you find yourself falling into a trance like state—loosing yourself in him. you find yourself here anytime you're with luke, always so easily falling into this intimate pattern. so it comes as suprise when your ears pick up on a dull thump in the distance, almost echoing through the quiet home.

"did you hear that?" you pull away from luke hurriedly, brows furrowed as you try and concentrate and listen further—straining your ears in attempt to catch any more sounds from beyond your bedroom.

luke whimpers at the loss of contact, eyes fluttering open to reveal his glossy, lustful eyes. "hear what?"

the dull thudding noise continues, increasing as if it was coming closer— sounding like somebody is walking, moving up the stairs towards your room. you gasp lightly, and with all the strength you can find, you push luke off the bed.

your sudden actions catch him off guard, and he goes easily, tumbling onto the rug with a loud thud. he groans out, and watches as you peek over the edge of the bed—your eyes blown wide with worry.

just before he can question your behaviour, you interrupt him, your tone hushed and full of fear. "it's curtis."

luke's face falls. "it's curtis?"

you nod quickly, looking in the direction of the door anxiously, listening as your brothers steps grow closer. you look back down at luke, "you gotta get under the bed."

"i'm not going to fit under the bed." luke whispers roughly, his own gaze darting between your nervous eyes and the bedroom door.

"well you gotta make it work, luke." you whisper wildly, shooing him. "scoot under—now."

the urgency in your voice has luke springing into action. he grabs onto the wooden frame of the bed, pulling himself under your bed. the rug rubs his bare back uncomfortably and the dust under the mattress is tickling his noise dangerously. the space is limited, and dirty, but you're not even thinking about that right now.

all you can focus on is the sound of curtis footsteps right outside the door, and just as the golden handle begins turning, luke finally gets situated under your bed, hiding from not only your sight, but hopefully your brothers.

you whip around just as the hinges squeak open, curtis appearing from behind the oak door. "hey." he greets you gently, still rubbing the sleep out of his eye with the palm of his hand. "are you talking to someone?"

you can feel the colour drain from your face, swallowing roughly as you keep your gaze ahead. "no?" your voice is definitely too high—too suspicious—answering quickly.

curtis's gaze narrows. "really? I thought I heard something." you watch in horror as your brother begins to look around the room, his movements suspiciously nonchalant as he scans the area—you can only pray that luke's feet aren't sticking out from underneath the mattress

you desperately need to get your brothers attention again and stop him from snooping around your space—you're pretty sure luke's phone is on the dresser. quickly, you spin your body to fully face curtis, clearing your throat. "well, I was watching a movie."

curtis' eyes flicker back to yours and away from your desk, his brows raised questionably. then, slowly, his gaze moves towards the tv on the wall. "the tv is broken."

you curse inwardly, swallowing thick salvia. "on my phone."

"okay..."he trails off. "just coming to check on you, making sure you were alright—couldve swore I heard something." your brother doesn't look all too convinced with what you're saying, and his pointed gaze has yet to waver.

you plaster on a smile. "oh i'm just peachy, curtis. thanks."

"you're acting weird."

"am I?" you question highly, crossing your arms.

he hums in answer, eyeing you suspiciously. "must just be tired. right?"

"right." you exhale shakily, and at this point you can only pray for this conversation to come to a close. subconsciously your eyes trail towards the bed, checking to make sure luke was still hidden.

curtis hums again, pulling your attention back to him. "better get to sleep then. goodnight."

you breathe, smiling again. "night."

he sends you one more curious look over his shoulder before he finally leaves, shutting the door with a gentle thud. the entire time you feel like you're going to die.

as soon as his feet sound descending back down the stairs, you're moving, practically skipping towards the bed.

your drop down on your stomach, looking under the gap between the floor and the mattress. "luke? are you breathing?"

he exhales loudly. "barley."

you send him a guilty smile. "guess we won't try this again, huh?"

two

luke pulls his hoodie over his torso, stretching his tired muscles as he adjust the material over his body.

the practice that finished only half hour ago was a taxing one. after a rough loss the previous night—one that he'd been cross checked in the ribs three separate times without a call—coach had been extra hard on the group today, which left luke even more sore and exhausted.

he shakes out his freshly washed hair, ruffling the curls between his fingers after they'd been flatted by his devils branded hood. the fuzzy material sticks to his damp chest, as luke was too tired to properly dry his skin—he just wanted to get home and call you, letting you coo at him and call him pretty (he loves it more than he’d ever admit).

"hey rusty." curtis distinctive teasing voice sounds behind luke, and he feels the center man’s hand on his shoulder, a rough squeeze in greeting. "you heading home now?"

curtis drops down to his reprieve stall—the one beside luke's—towel still around his waist as he pulls on his t-shirt, looking at the defence man expectantly.

luke swallows gently, giving curtis a quick nod. "yeah," he grabs his duffle bag, one full of extra hockey gear he always brings back and forth to the rink. "jacks already outside, said he wanted to shower when he got home."

"right on." curtis hums, pulling on his socks.

the sporadic buzzing noise of an incoming call draws the attention of both athletes, and their eyes are pulled to luke's beaten up phone, sitting screen up on the stall seat.

it's you. you're calling him.

curtis's brows raise, and he makes a teasing noise. "russssttttyyyy, who the hell is lovey?" before luke can even react, curtis picks up the phone, inspecting the profile picture set for your contact that’s flashing on the screen. thank god it’s an inconspicuous mirror pic, one lacking your face—luke can only pray curtis doesn’t inspect that picture too hard. "I didn't know you had a girlfriend."

luke swallows, eyes darting between the centerman and the phone clutched in his calloused hands. "I don't."

"there's a heart beside the name." he deadpans. "should I answer it and ask her about it instead?"

"no!" luke lunges towards his phone, but curtis is quicker, standing from is stall and side stepping the youngest hughes.

"easy dude. what's the big deal." with a breathy laugh, curtis slides his thumb across the answer button, picking up your incoming call.

"dude." luke grabs the phone from his hands just before curtis can place it to his ear. "a little privacy." the awkward chuckle that leaves him is almost embarrassing, and the way his hands have started shaking and the blush covering luke from head to toe is also humiliating.

curtis laughs, clearly finding amusement in luke's clear embarrassment. "i'm literally standing in front of you with my dick out, but sure rusty, i'll leave your secret girlfriend alone."

luke can just hear your muffled voice through the phone, muttering his name questionably—no doubt wondering what the fuck is going on. "sorry she's just...shy. you'll meet her one day."

curtis snickers, finally pulling on his sweats. "i'm sure I will."

luke nods—unsure what to say.

"better get going, rusty. think somebody is probably waiting to hear your voice." the center man's eyes dart between him and the phone in his hands, brows raised knowingly.

"right." he swallows, "see you later." luke practically runs out of the locker room, and as soon as he makes it down the hall, he raises the phone to his ear, hurriedly explaining to you the close call he'd just encountered with curtis.

three

you didn’t mean to have that many drinks—really, you didn't. but a couple of your friends from class invited you out to celebrate the ending semester, and because you all passed, they said drinks were in order and you had to join.

a few hours and many drinks in, you were practically falling over. you had stayed out later than you originally planned on, and curtis would be long asleep by now—leaving you with limited options for getting home.

drunk you—ever the clingy girlfriend—called luke almost instantly. and obviously luke picked up on the first ring, despite the early morning time, and of course he came to the bar as soon as you asked.

which brings you to right now, knees weak as you sway on your homes front porch, pouting up at your boyfriend in the cold winter night.

luke looks down at you gently, his eyes full of exhaustion. but yet, there’s a hint of amusement in them, and the edge of his mouth is turned up in a lazy smirk.

"kiss me goodnight." you drunkenly slur for the 10th time since luke guided you out of the car. you are looking at your boyfriend expectantly, an impatient whine leaving your lips. "please baby."

it's so dark outside he can barley make out your features, but he can see the way your hazy eyes twinkle at him—silently begging. luke's gaze flickers towards the ring camera quickly, praying that it's one that isn't an audio recorder, and if it does pick up sound, luke hopes you're too quiet to catch.

you’ve both always been careful with the camera before this, and if the lazar house was the only option for your…escapades, you’d both avoid the camera expertly—sneaking through windows and back doors like misbehaved children.

but you’re too drunk to even think about that, and luke’s too tired to even attempt sneaking you through the back door.

your pout turns into a smile, and your arms snake up his body, wrapping around his neck and pulling yourself up to your toes. "please please please please."

he sighs gently, glancing at the camera again. in a moment of weakness, he decides it's probably to dark too make out any kind of facial features through the camera anyway, and if he doesn't kiss you now, the camera will be the least of his worries.

so luke wraps his arms around your waist tighter, keeping your sway steady. he leans down, pecking your lips so quickly that he hopes even if the camera can see him, the affection was so brief that in a blink you'd miss it. "okay now go inside."

your grin widens, and as you finally pull away from luke, you're overjoyed and satisfied.

when you wake the next morning, you feel yourself panic—flashes of the kiss on the porch and the ring camera running through your mind.

you wait anxiously for curtis to bring it up and call you out for kissing his teammate in front of the front door...but it never comes.

the ring camera hasn't worked for a week—and that has you breathing a sigh of relief when your sister-in-law mentions it the following evening.

+one

you can't even think logically as you rush through the crowded arena, weaving through bodies as you clutch the pass around your neck, anxiously fiddling with the lanyard.

the scene in your head is playing on repeat—watching luke get thrown to the ice during the messy scrum from only minutes ago, his head slamming against the ice as he hit the ground.

you'd shot up from your seat, worry sketched across your face as you watched luke laying limp on the ice as the trainer spoke into his ear—the fear all but consumed you. jack's girlfriend tried to console you—comfort you—but nothing was helping.

you gave it 5 minutes. 5 minutes after they helped luke off the ice and down to the assessment room, before you were out of your seat, mumbling some excuse to sammy as you left.

you make your way through the tunnels easily, very much used to the area and familiar with the space after many visits with curtis. you find the assessment room easily, the door left open the smallest crack so you're able to subtly peek in—so if someone else is in there with him, you won’t be caught.

but it's just luke, sitting slumped on a doctor like bed with his eyes closed—arms crossed over his chest guard, his jerseys discarded in a sweaty lump on the metal table beside him.

with the coast clear, you push open the door fully, letting it softly swing closed behind you. the sound has luke's eyes fluttering open, and he immediately finds your worried eyes blinking back at him.

you breathe a heavy exhale, a slight wobble in the sound that portrays the emotion crawling up your throat—desperate to be let out. all the fear and stress and worry you've been feeling for the past 6 minutes are coming to a hilt, and you rush towards your boyfriend with a pout pulling at your lips. "are you okay?"

"hey." he mumbles gently, brows pulled tightly as you appear his side. "what are you doing down here?"

you gently take ahold of his face, eyes frantically bouncing around as if you're trying to locate any injuries. "luke, holy shit. I was so scared." tears begin welling in your eyes, bottom lip trembling. “you weren’t moving.”

luke slowly swings his legs over the side of the medical bed, cooing gently. your hands fall from his face in favour of wiping your own, catching the trail of water as it cascades down your cheeks.

luke's hockey pant covered thighs part, creating enough space for you to stand between them. he wraps his arm around you waist, bringing you into his embrace. you go easily, tears continuing to cloud your vision as you fall into his sweaty chest. "i'm sorry I scared you." he mumbles into your hair, pressing a lingering kiss against your forehead.

you shake your head. "are you okay?" you ask again, pulling back just enough to look into his warm eyes. “what did they say?”

"i've got a concussion most likely, but i'll be fine." luke's words are reassuring, and so is the kiss he presses against your cheek. he's coherent, and he's moving—he's okay.

"is there anything you need from me?" you ask gently, pushing his wet curls off his forehead—something you’d always find yourself doing.

luke’s eyes flutter slightly at the comforting action. his soft grin turns boyish, and silently he purses his lips, asking for a kiss.

you roll your eyes gently, but oblige, leaning in and pressing your lips to his. luke sighs pleasantly, parting his lips as he begins to deepen the kiss, pulling your body in tighter.

you smile into it, which allows luke the access to slip his tongue past your bottom lip, and you let him. his hand travels down your back, slowly tickling the expanse of your skin until he's rounding over the curve of your ass, giving your cheek a firm squeeze.

"alright rusty if you're gunna kiss my sister here, the least you could do is not play grab ass while you do it." the sudden voice of curtis has you pulling away, and you turn towards the door in record speed.

you'd been too lost in the trance luke always put you in—to absorbed in his body and lips that you'd missed not only the end of period buzzer echoing throughout the arena, but the door opening behind you.

you're too scared too move—too scared to even blink. you look at curtis with wide eyes, your face void of colour, giving you a lifeless look. and luke's no better, with his mouth opening and closing like a fish and his hand still on your ass cheek—even after you turned around.

you push his hand away and swallow roughly. "curtis...I-we can explain."

your brother shrugs. "there's nothing to explain. I know."

your brows shoot up. "you know?"

curtis nods triumphantly, looking rather pleased with himself. this time it's luke who speaks, swallowing the little salvia lingering in his dry mouth. "what-I-how?" he stutters.

"that night awhile back, when I came to check on you, luke's sweater was on your chair." he looks at you playfully, "I saw the number and I knew."

now you're going red, felling a wave of guilt and embarrassment creep in on you. "i'm sorry."

"we're sorry." luke adds gently. "we shouldn't of kept it a secret."

"I'm not mad—just a little disappointed that I was left out of the loop." then, curtis expression changes, looking at you with a gentle smile. "out of all the guys on this team you could’ve picked...rusty's the best one."

you smile, glancing up at luke.

he meets your gaze, and he wraps his arm around your waist, bringing you back into his side.

"consider yourself in the loop." you chime through an exhale, looking back towards curtis.

"good." he nods, his usual teasing expression back on his face. curtis looks at luke, a brow raised. "so, were you under the bed or in the closet?"

you feel luke stiffen beside you, and you can't help but laugh.

[colorlessjay]

hello! may be a weird request but do you have any fanfic recommendations?

BUCKLE THE FUCK UP

OH DO I HAVE SOME RECS FOR YA'LL

Mind you, 90% are based on personal preference and fics I think about way too often than I should. A lot of them influenced the way I make characters interact

Some of them might not be your taste and that's cool!

First off, Gotta promote the fics that people wrote inspired by my art (I am truly honored)

Time Cast A Spell On You by bethefirstwhoeverdid

Cabin of Feathers by Featherpie (Izupie)

Return To The Past by faeryn

NOW FOR MY COLLECTION

Just any fic written by everandanon

I swear to you, all of their fics are worth a read. They are frustrating (In a good way for me) but the worldbuilding, comedy, dialogue, and character interactions always have me physically getting up and laughing. At one point during Quarentantion, I had to stop reading to rant to my friends about it because it made me feel so much that I went to 3 different friends about it. With Interest actually made my heart physically hurt at certain points. Expectations had me on a roller coaster ride But if you think their fics are a little overwhelming, I recommend reading Casicorn. It's the first ever fic I read from them and it solidified my love for this author. I swear I am on my hands and KNEES waiting for them to finish their newest fic

Where All My Journeys End - (a Twist and Shout alt universe) by Say_It_In_Enochian

Did reading Twist and Shout devastate you? Did it emotionally hurt your heart and make you wish there was something to make the pain lighter? READ THIS FUCKING FIC NOW I got so fucking lucky when I found it immediately after reading T&S and when I tell you the JOURNEY this fic took me? It healed my soul The struggles, the history, the relationships, the LONG fight to get to their happy ending I am FLOORED this doesn't have 1000 Kudos!

The Ed Sheeran Effect by tricia_16

It made me laugh. That's it. It's sweet and funny and really fun and just feels very campy, like it could've been a decent movie I would rewatch on days I just feel like feeling good Am I a sucker for HighSchool/College AU fics? Yes do I fucking care? No

The Best Years of Our Lives, My Ass by ireallyhatecornnuts (CharleyFoxtrot)

I. fucking. love. this. fic The story alone was so interesting but it was the DIALOGUE that hooked me in. I swear I think about this fic in the middle of drawing and go "Damn, good times" like it's a long lost friend

Slide Away by Castielslostwings

It's the TENSION that got me. I can't explain to you how much I just love their hate-pining for each other Read it, love it, in my digital bookshelf

Sleep Without You by turningthepages

Hilarious. The density is so high it could float. I swear to god I've read this fic at least three times and think about it once a week I remember reading it and cackling so much that I woke up my mom

Should've Just Asked by Annie D (scaramouche)

I wish this fic had a follow-up that was just Dean's perspective because I would LOVE to read more of it. The situation is so absurd and I binged it all in one day (I'm a very slow reader)

Pinfall by crowleyo

I'm gonna say it. I'm so actually angry this fic doesn't get enough attention. It is so so SO well-written and heart-wrenching. Am I still a sucker for highschool sweethearts? YES! I OPENLY ADMIT THIS! But COME ON

Of fuming and partaking and so on by zation

This fic and literally any fic from Zation. I absolutely love the way this author writes. It's so funny and self-aware and the dialogue and scenarios always keep me entertained and laughing They have such a large catalog of fics that I'm pretty sure I have at least 15 saved on my phone

Mr. Blue Sky by anyrei, queerwolf79

This fic specifically and literally ANYTHING from these two. I swear, a lot of their fics are certified bangers. Mr. Blue Sky is probably a personal favorite of mine cause I actually teared up

Love Me More by Saiorse_Irvyne

I'm not the biggest fan of A/B/O stuff, but MAN this has me feeling things. When a fic makes me feel strong emotions, I just gotta recommend it

Lock and Key by tricia_16

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH it's THAT good

Kind Of A Forever Deal by komodobits

It's FUN. It's FUNNY. It's so fucking campy and cute and the progression of their relationship was just AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

It's Always the End of the World Somewhere by Annie D (scaramouche)

I can sit here and recommend Annie D's fics all DAY, but I'm recommending this one specifically because of this: “Get a room, assholes,” someone mutters. “Hey!” Crowley whirls on the offender. “I could set on you on fire!” And that's one of many fantastic quotes

Cinderwings by bendingsignpost

One of the first fics I've ever read from this fandom, and I recommend it to ANYONE regardless of whether they know Destiel or not. The story is so fucking captivating it makes me want to eat my foot it's so GOOD

--------------

Do I have a type when it comes to fanfics? Yes

But I like gravitating towards funny dialogue and silly shenanigans. I thrive off of fun fics that sometimes take themselves seriously, but still pull me back and make me laugh

If a fic can make me feel such a strong emotion that I PHYSICALLY have to get up? Then fuck yeah it's going in my archives

I would recommend some of the darker fics I have, but this is for fun

[everestgale]

*emerges from shadows*

Hello everyone! Did you know that Everest really likes Skeptunist? They really like Skeptunist. They've been incessantly rotating it in their brain for... a while-

While I liked the ship for quite a while, the culprit and catalyst for this entire post is @writingdevil's Skeptunist fic! Yet again, Devil's writing just hits me in the head, and I can't stop it now ¯(◡‿◡✿) /¯

And so I, uh, ended up making quite a few drawings and sketches of different scenes from that fic, using my Skeptic and Opportunist's voice designs! All the drawings you see here all use dialogue from it, so please go check it out!!! It's a very well-written fic, and it just fits so well with how I imagine both Skeptic and Oppy, and it's such a wonderful idea- AAAAAH, I LOVE IT SO MUCH!

Ahem. Anyways, go read it first, if you are even a little bit interested in the ship! The drawings will make a lot more sense if you do :]

I'm serious! This is your final chance to go read the fic first! The rest of more spoiler-y drawings will be under the cut!

If it's a little unclear what's happening in these drawings, I put explanations in the alt text!

Oh, and this is certainly not the last of Skeptunist you will see from me. There's a whole other fic (two fics, technically!) that I've been relentlessly thinking about, and I already have like 17 (/exaggerating) different sketches for it. Coming soon-ish (tm)

Rough unfinished sketches first! I wanted to get those done too, but kind of lost focus, so these will stay as-is (at least for now).

Half-Skeptunist, half-"Everest practices drawing Opportunist's facial expressions"! It was very fun to draw, I really like how the second drawing turned out :]

AAAAAAAAAAAAAH- (this is how Everest felt at that moment in the fic. I can't with them, help- /lh)

[genericpuff]

The excessively passive voice when talking about Minthe being intended to have BPD is hilarious. "It was thought to have her written with BPD"? So weird

Honestly, once you start noticing this passive voice in how Rachel writes and talks, it's kind of hard to unsee.

Like, for starters, the BPD example. It's very non-committal, almost as if to sound like she never actually wrote her with BPD, it was just an 'idea' that she could neither confirm or deny as canon. But then you read the episode with the slap and-

It's- it's literally called "Splitting". It's about as subtle as a brick to the face. This entire episode showcases Minthe having an actual literal episode of splitting and it's plain as day to anyone who can read the title card and put two and two together. So for the wording to be so passive around her characterization... it wasn't "thought" to have her written with BPD, she was written with BPD.

Another example that sticks out in my mind of Rachel's passive writing is far later in Season 3, when Demeter reunites with Persephone and naturally expects her to come back home with her.

This line still fucking bothers me to this day. Besides the fact that it's just really poorly written dialogue, Persephone describes her being in love with Hades as if it's just some coincidental thing that happened to her that she can't avoid and not a deliberate choice she's making. "It would seem" my ass, Persephone is a coward for not being upfront and just talking to her mother like an adult by saying, "Mother, I love you, and I understand why you want me to come home, but I'm in love with Hades and want to stay in the Underworld with him." Instead the way it's worded is almost designed to absolve Persephone of any and all agency in her own decisions and active participation in her relationship with Hades by instead making it out to be just some circumstance that she can't get herself out of.

Again, this isn't quite as egregious as the aforementioned BPD scene, but it's still irritating because Rachel writes like this a lot throughout LO. And it's not just the dialogue either, entire decisions throughout the comic are flip-flopped and kept vague by Rachel so she can give herself plausible deniability over the narrative. I could come up with some of my own examples, but I think she managed to speak for herself just fine in the end-of-series Q&A that left both critics and fans of the series massively confused and disappointed:

LO is full of half-committed plotlines because Rachel herself can't commit to her own decisions. So the decisions she does make are left vague enough that hardcore fans are willing enough to fill in the blanks themselves, but anyone who asks her genuinely what her plan was, she just gives the same wordy "IDK it's up to your interpretation!" response. It's like she thinks people are asking her as just another reader who can only speculate, but she's literally the author, so why is she acting like her guess is as good as theirs?

Well, because that's how she wrote LO. That's how she's always written comics, with vague half-finished thoughts and just enough for readers to do the mental gymnastics of making sense of it all just to give her the credit for "smart writing" that she never actually did because she stopped paying attention after the first sentence. And that method of being vague for the sake of audience interpretation is fine for illustrations or anything that isn't trying to be a concise narrative, but LO did try to be that and it really shows how hard it failed in doing so when its own creator can't even come up with something slightly plausible to explain all the questions people had in the end. "There is some backstory there" but proceeds to not actually expand on said backstory. "I like to imply things without outright telling people", so do I, but the difference is that Rachel is using that as a crutch to not answer the questions she setup for her readers and then didn't resolve after five years. There's not wanting to spoon feed people the plot, and then there's literally refusing to explain your decisions when writing said plot, almost because you don't know any more than they do.

The entirety of LO is rooted in Rachel's passiveness, from her inability to answer questions concisely to every little plot point that was established and dropped throughout the comic's run. Writing a story is a series of decisions, deciding what to keep, deciding what not to keep, deciding what has to be changed, etc. and Rachel just... doesn't seem like someone who's ever been capable of making those decisions, especially when she's writing an actual long form story to the end and doesn't have the luxury of dropping it whenever it feels convenient for her like she did several times with The Doctor Pepper Show. Once she was actually held to a standard, once she was actually signed into a contract that expected her to make those decisions, she failed to and it culminated in one of the messiest conclusions to a story I've seen since Game of Thrones.

LO is kind of like Schrodinger's Cat - a plot point can be or not be whatever it needs to be so that Rachel can be either praised for smart writing she never did or absolved of bad writing that she did do. It's equally parts interesting and vague enough that whatever her readers give her credit for writing, she can give them a thumbs-up and go "you're totally right, champ!" and proceed to take all the credit of being a "good writer" from the efforts of her own audience who had to jump through a million hoops to make sense of her own messy writing.

But when she's put on the spot by those very same readers to answer for her own decisions, she can't.

Because she never made them.

Because there was never anything "deeper" going on, that's just what her style of "distraction writing" made you believe. The plot never lets you stop to think about what you just read long enough before zipping away to the next thing and distracting you with a new twist or a new character or a new plot point, and before you know it, you've gone weeks without reading about the last thing that was established you probably haven't even realized that those questions never got answered. Sometimes Rachel remembers to get back to those things and resolves them within a handful of panels, other times she forgets them entirely and just leaves them to rot in the hopes that no one ever calls her out on it. And when they do... she can just pull the get-out-of-jail-free "Welp, it's up to your interpretation!" card and get that credit all over again for being deep and insightful, meanwhile those who are rightfully dissatisfied with that answer are blanket-accused of "getting mad at Rachel for not writing the story they wanted".

To close out this ask that, per tradition, turned into an essay, I'd like to recall the famous words of fictional detective Benoit Blanc: "Look into the clear center of this glass onion... Miles Bron is an idiot!"

[mistress-of-vos]

I'd make a longer post (and maybe one day I will) but since Lore Olympus, the story that introduced me to webtoons is coming to an end I'd like to say something:

I can't believe it is considered problematic. It has to be one of the sweetest, fluffiest, simplest stories I have read (hence why I still like it, it's a relaxing read before bed) and somehow it got too "kinky" for mainstream. It's laughable.

Everytime I dare to click on their tag or look for the # on Twitter or FB I see people clutching their pearls as if Lore Olympus were brainwashing teenagers into marrying a non existent God of the dead and have babies with him. What the hell?

The fact that people think LO is too dark makes me laugh. A single episode of Rick&Morty, BoJack Horseman or HQS has way more explicit content and dialogue. In fact!!! If it were up to me LO would have gotten genuinely kinky!!! All it does is have some surface spicy tropes that get sugar coated to not make puritans awkward and tbh that's sad. LO and the author get terribly hated anyway for daring to portray the most common female fantasy.

And this all makes me laugh but also mad because you'd think LO at least has some genuine dark themes but no? At most we have Persephone's trauma due to Apollo's abuse and yet that topic is treated as a therapy pamphlet because people couldn't handle an imperfect victim. Hades is a wife guy who shows little to no anger. Hera was re written to be sort of a feminist so that people stopped being annoying about women having emotions.

LO is a sweet, simple story with tiny spicy things here and there that were eventually pushed aside because people couldn't handle it. I wonder how Rachel feels about this, because at the beginning the story was extremely spicy and the only crime was being published in a platform as webtoon, full of people who can't differentiate reality from fiction.

Is LO a masterpiece? Idk! I enjoy the story, it's very self indulgent for me, but I won't go and analyze every detail to see how it should be labeled as it's not meant to be a perfect media. It's meant to be an entertaining, nice story of romance and it does that job very well. This need to demand perfect writing while also crucifying authors over "dark" themes is ridiculous and contradictory.

And I keep wondering, if these people loathe LO so much, why dedicate all that time to the infinte posts they make about how they would have told the story? And all those re tellings are boring! It's always "So Persephone and Hades won't ever kiss here because she's a lesbian. Also he doesn't appear at all. And Demeter isn't an abusive mom! Oh and everyone is ugly because gods shouldn't be beautiful! And Apollo isn't evil he's uwu baby. And no toxic relationships here, Zeus is a good husband!"

Sweet Gaia, you guys wouldn't handle Saint Seiya having Athena in the body of a teenage girl with big tits and who's constantly in the edge of breaking her virginity vows. This attitude screams of jealousy and puritanism and both are disgusting.

TLDR: LO being too problematic for people is both funny and annoying. I wished it actually were as kinky and dark as people insist it is. I'd pay for a toxic romance, but that being said, I LOVE it very much as it is and it's nice to have a re telling that, while not pretending to be loyal to mythology, didn't go for a route of sanitizing all the myths. I hope that once it ends haters will move on and let real fans and the author alone. 🙏

[preztee]

[extremely biased Dorian romancer voice] Guys, I think we won.

I know it's more common to hear that Solas romancers won - and after seeing how much extra content they got (additional dialogue trees with the Inquisitor and a whole alternate ending with a kiss), I can definitely see why.

But that's the thing - I've seen Solas romancers utterly split on if they liked this extra content or not. I've seen takes ranging from, "oh, I'm so glad I finally got my happy ending!" to "what the hell? This is awful!"

I've seen people heaping endless praise onto Solas' characterization. I've seen people deeply upset over Solas' characterization. I've seen people who think the Inquisitor vowing to save Solas is the most romantic thing ever. I've seen people who hate how the writing portrayed the Inquisitor as hopeless, blinded by love, and shadowed by Solas' dynamic with Mythal.

Case being... the fanbase is polarized. Some people won, but some people lost very, very bad. I've noticed the latter with those who had Inquisitors that romanced Solas, but wound up angry and vowing to stop him.

So, back to my first point. How did Dorian romancers "win"? For lack of a better term.

Well, for one, we got more content than every other romance (barring Solas'). I'm mad on behalf of the other romances, but there's no denying we made it out VERY lucky in that regard. Could it have been better? Yeah. But honestly, in comparison to Hawke talking about their romanced companion, I feel like we won. Not a huge win (Warden Alistair's dialogue about the HoF was a MASSIVE win), but a pretty good victory nonetheless.

Romance wise we got: direct, in-character interaction that alludes to Trespasser's conflict with the anchor secretly killing the Inquisitor. Sweet idle dialogue from Dorian. An immensely touching letter from Dorian that logically concludes his character arc from Inquisition (with him no longer being allergic to The L Word!). And we even got a Dorian romanced Inquisitor implying that he's up in Minrathous enough to consider himself a source of information for the Inquisition.

Generally, we got: Dorian being written in character (this is helped by him showing up as a side character and not a main one... less questionable decisions), with notable development stemming from what was planted in Inquisition (working through emotional repression, abolition and enacting societal change, etc). The option to make Dorian Archon or not, allowing for the player to decide what future they want for him. The Inquisitor wearing the Shadow Dragon casual outfit and arranging meetings in Dock Town of all places. Both of them surviving to the end of Veilguard. Both of them working and fighting together in the finale to save Minrathous and stop the gods despite the Inquisitor's duties in the south. Heavy implications that Dorian and the Inquisitor have been talking off screen about Rook and about recent events. Vague timeline that allows for several headcanons to fit - like, are they married? Engaged? Idk. How often does the Inquisitor visit? Well, often enough to consider himself a direct source of information, but with recent events, he and Dorian have been forced to use the calling crystals and write letters over the course of weeks... so really, it's up to you.

What we didn't get: Maybe a dialogue tree during Rook's conversations with the Inquisitor. Uhhh, there's one optional dialogue response if you're too formal with the Inquisitor where he calls Dorian an old friend. Which Dorian also does to the Inquisitor in Trespasser. Literally the same exact wording of "old friend". I can't be too mad over a such a funny oversight happening again. In the exact same way. But this time easily avoidable.

TL;DR - We got a lot of wins, a lack of divisive content, and a generally happy fanbase. That, and the Inquisitor and Dorian standing next to each other. Oh, the screenshots to be had. The whimsy of it all.

[avicinda]

Completely by accident, I triggered the dialogue about Giovanni for myself while trying to navigate the Sea of Stars and find something, so here's the entire fucking dialogue (after the rant, under the cut).

I have tried so goddamn hard to not be overly emotionally charged about the way I talk about this patch and I don't know if I've even managed that this whole time, but I am at my limit now. I legitimately feel sick to my stomach about this retcon.

I have never felt such hate for a character and the writing around them, both the narrative and their dialogue, for what it represents to this game. This really does feel like being told "fuck you for caring about the 1.0 story" not even just from this character, but from the company behind the game. I hate this so much.

Where the hell do we even go from here if they don't do a rollback? How do you even fix this kind of damage to your own story? It's like everything wrong with this patch can be summed up right here alongside that stupid seesaw and bathtub. And of course I can't stop second guessing my reaction to this. Am I being hyperbolic? Am I being stupid about this? Was I the stupid one all along for liking the story this game started? Fuck me I guess for thinking Giovanni's character was actually well written. Fuck me for thinking the 1.0 story was good. Fuck me for thinking all of 1.0-1.4 were fine content-wise. I guess none of my feedback about what I liked about the game mattered in the end because I'm just one person and the majority disliked what I loved, and those were the voices that got listened to when it came time to make the game bigger for the Steam release. What the actual hell are we even doing here anymore?

Here's a cute pic of my Nikki first though so I don't have to see the Seer first thing if I accidentally open this post when looking at my blog.

(first line in next pic is from Nikki)

[coffinclownery]

Clinical Trial Impressions

Firstestly before spoiling the whole game here's my tl:dr

Unfortunately I think this is a great game. Like sorry, there's a lot of care and thought that's been put into this game that makes it difficult for me to dismiss it as simply a "barely disguised fetish" kind of game. There's a lot of details from the character-writing to the art to even the ways the dialogue works that's just...good. This is unfortunate because it means that instead of easily dismissing this and moving on with my life I'm left thinking about this game weeks after watching playthroughs and playing it myself. Lot of thoughts have been provoked out of me.

Is it perfect? No. There's things that definitely could have been changed and/or expanded upon. And I don't think it's for everyone. While nothing is shown or told in graphic detail there's things that happen to the characters that can be triggering because of how well-written it is and the events preceding it. And while I argue the endings both make sense for the most part I don't blame you for not vibing with them.

So yeah, need to stop checking out playthroughs from manlybadasshero because he keeps finding games to Haunt me and I don't appreciate it. I recommend playing it if you feel comfortable with the content warnings. It is a free game so the worst thing that can happen is that you'll be Haunted like I am without spending a dime.

The content warnings on the itchio page does not cover everything, so I'll put my list below under the cut before going into more spoilery opinions. A lot of the content warnings come from what happens at the last hour, so it's going to spoil you.

Content Warnings: Needles, Pixelated Gore, Mentions of SA, Mentions of Familial Abuse, Mental Health Struggles related to ADHD symptoms and trauma responses, Taxidermy, Stalking and Surveillance, Obsession, Theft of personal items, Mentions of Suicide, On-screen depiction of suicide in one ending.

If you think I missed any let me know. Now here's more spoilery opinions below the gif.

Hey here's a scorching hot take.

Stalking...

...

...

...

Is bad.

Thank you thank you I'll take my Nobel prize now.

This is still at the end of the day a free 3-4hr game, mainly made by one person. So I'm not going to dock points or demand an imaginary refund when I say it felt like there could have been more or things could have been slightly different. As a lot of folks mentioned this game starts at a nice slowburn but then things go at a breakneck pace right at the end. I myself think the pace is pretty good up until the big reveal. After that I think things get a little wonky.

I still think they have all the bones in the right place (which can't be said for Brandon huehuehue.) Both Lee's obsession with Angel and what he ultimately did for them needed to be revealed, and it makes sense that the shrine was revealed first. Because let's be honest here, in the realm of fiction killing a bastard is not that controversial. And here they made the bastard as unlikable as possible, where even the man about to kill him is uncomfortable touching him. Like he was such an unrepentant pathetic loser that it almost became comical. So if we discovered the body in the basement first I think it would have been very easy to go "good job!" and not really digest what else is going on here.

So having the shrine first is important, because it is an affront to Angel themself. He stole their jacket! He did something to it without their consent! Angel already went through a horrendous event, and now here's somebody they placed their trust in using them in another way. And even without the jacket it's creepy to collect someone else's body mass like hair or blood from tissues. It's up to Angel whether they can accept this, but it doesn't remove the fact that this is still A Crime done to Angel. It's what shaped why the murder was actually sorta bad? It's not the morality of it all, it's the repercussions Angel themselves might face because of what Lee's obsession led to.

So it's important for the shrine to be seen first so we know who we're dealing with. We might be cool with a bastard dying slowly in a dug-out basement (again in the realm of fiction blah blah blah) but not cool with someone stalking, stealing personal items, deifying someone and then no matter how unintentional incriminating someone for murder by not even cleaning up before inviting guests. Even if we somehow predicted this twist this is the creator's way of going "are you SURE you want to get down with this dude?" and I can respect that. Like yeah no Lee is unarguably a freak and ultimately you need to choose if you're cool with that before finding the body.

And I think the endings fit well enough. It's easy for folks to deem End 1 as the Bad Ending and End 2 as the Good Ending. And that fits if you think of Lee being the main character. Because he's ultimately the one who gets punished in End 1 for what he did to Angel. It's certainly his Bad Ending if he's rejected by the person he deified and obsessed over first and only later fell in love with. Things might have been easier for Angel if they cooperated with Lee, and it does look bleak if you believed everything Lee said. But that's the path Angel chose to take and I think the open-endedness of it is good. Neither us nor Angel know what'll happen when they leave, but that won't stop Angel from moving forward. No matter how bleak it is Angel still has a future, while Lee denied his.

And End 2 works as well, because it's still Angel making that choice to accept both his freak and his body count. Angel's the one who gets to choose what happens at that moment, with full* knowledge of what Lee's done. They're the one choosing to help cover up a murder, and they're the one who choosing to move in with Lee afterwards. Because Lee wasn't going to make Angel stay, he just needed Angel to cooperate so Angel themselves doesn't get into trouble. And even if they might live happily for awhile, I think the music at the end of End 2 hints at an eerie feeling. There's still a chance things can go very wrong down the line.

*Except maybe the jacket if you don't check the washing machine. I feel like that should have been discovered at the shrine before the choice.*

Although with End 2 I don't blame people for calling it the "canon" ending giving it has a more detailed cutscene. And if you look at the creator's game profiles you can tell they clearly care for the two as a couple, but they note anything they post that's not in the game is not canon so...there's that.

I still think the pacing could have been a little but different. Between the discovery of the shrine and the discovery of a basement there was a brief cooldown that I think messes with the tone. If the only two endings are going to be Accepting both discoveries or Rejecting both, I feel like this cooldown should be removed altogether. Have Lee only catch up with Angel after they discovered everything, then they can slowly digest wtf is happening and make a decision. Or make the gap between the shrine and the body wider.

I also feel like some of the dialogue could have been resorted. I think all the dialogue is important, and I'm against removing stuff that'd make Lee less of a freak (you cannot put the freak back inside the bottle once its out im sorry) but the order in which things are said felt a little off. It didn't cross my mind that Angel could be implicated until its stated after the choice to Accept or Reject, which is a weird priority when faced with a Body.

I feel like either:

A: The choice should have been about accepting or rejecting that Lee committed a murder first and foremost. The dialogue can stay roughly the same in the Reject, when Lee is trying to find a way to remain in Angel's life, but in Accept have Angel more blatantly offer to help cover up the murder themselves, since in this version Angel's priority is wanting to stay with Lee.

Or

B: Angel should have had more time to process the body on the ground and come to the realization that they'd be a main suspect before Lee arrives, hear what Lee did and what steps he's already taken to avoid suspicion, and then make the choice. That way the choice is more focused on whether Angel cooperates with Lee or not.

Either way I also think in the Accept version of events there should have been a re-establishment of Angel's feelings. Like after Angel says they'd have to move of they stay will Lee have Lee go "wait, you still want to stay with me?"

Also, maybe in the Reject ending, have Angel call Adri. In week 5 Adri could have offered her number or Angel asked for theirs and let that be a Chekov's gun. You can still have Angel not receive messages (because Angel probably went awol on everything after what happened to them, so Adri assumed they weren't interested and gave up contacting) and make Angel choose to reach out to Adri. Angel refused Lee's help, so they're going to find help themselves. Would also give Adri's presence a more obvious purpose.

...But again this is a free game written by one person, so I'm not going to judge the creator too harshly for not doing things perfectly in a way that'd satisfy this specific stranger on the webs. Any of these changes would inevitability require more lines, more time, more programming, and maybe even more art be put into the game. Ultimately the creator put what was absolutely necessary for the story to work, which is what mattered.

This is all just me conjecturing on a remake in 5 years called Clinical Trial Ultra Mega Deluxe Remix 1.5 Medical Grade Edition you know?

I need to run errands so I'll be generous and let you be on your way here. On the next post I'll talk about the details I liked in this game and how it differentiates itself from other horror games featuring questionable and datable stalker killers.

[randomrosewrites]

Book 4 re-write afterword 1/2

Summary:

Azul stops, which makes you stop. Jamil is a few paces behind both of you, arms folded, unmoving. “Hm?” Jamil looks up. His gaze is dark and cold. Your stomach churns as you gulp. “I’m sorry,” he says, not sounding sorry at all. “I can’t let you both stay here. It’s time you go back to the sea.”

A while back, I finished my book 4 re-write. Where essentially yuu (you) breaks their arm mid-book and things progress from there. It was a time-consuming and fulfilling project that started as a small oneshot but snowballed into a nearly 60K long series. If you would like to check it out, you can do so here.

I have a lot of thoughts about it, reflecting back. And some things I wanted to discuss in more detail. I thought it might be interesting for others to read so I made a post about it. (more under the cut)

Part 2

On the Seafloor - April 2024

This was written as a oneshot, meant to stand alone with no continuing parts to it. It was mostly because I missed writing and hadn't written anything for over a year, and wanted to dip my toes into it. I had recently read a series on AO3 that really inspired me. I loved the way the author wrote and wanted to make something of my own, with the characters I so dearly loved. Thus, this was born, towards the end of exam season. It was close to midnight. I remember thinking how loud the sound effect for the crash noise was when Grim and MC land in the Mostro Lounge. (Look it up yourself if you're interested. It happens in Book 4, chapter 20 to be exact. The chapter title is, in ENG server 'On the Seafloor' Can you tell where I got the name for this chapter from?) Anyway, I wrote most of it around midnight, shivering in my office as I typed. I knew what I wanted to write in fragments, the beats between Azul & Yuu and Jade & Yuu, but nothing much after the twins pushed back the Scarabia students. The first draft was a mess (it always is) but in my mind, I had one concrete line of dialogue.

I went to bed and wrote the rest of it over the course of a few days. Then, I edited it a ton and then posted it. The entire process took a week total.

Okay, some dialogue thoughts, now.

Frequently in story, Azul says things he doesn't mean. For example, when he's complimenting someone (and doesn't mean it) or when he's trying to play off how he's really feeling (by trying to seem more in control/ calm/ nonchalant when he's really unsure or shaken.) He's a hard character to write because I (the author) have to make it so that the readers can pick up on when this dishonesty occurs without beating them over the head with it. At the same time, characters in the story might not pick up on Azul's dishonesty (in this case, yuu) because of their emotions or physical state.

So for this scene: Readers probably assume Azul isn't being completely serious when he says 'I don't want you making a mess of the carpet' but Yuu (MC, you, etc) can't understand that in the moment because of their emotions and physical state, etc. etc.

Every interaction with Azul is like tip-toeing on this line. It's really frustrating at times but I think I ended up doing it pretty well.

the last thing I wanted to touch on with this work is how MC is beginning to break down Azul's walls a bit. It's not much but it's a difference from the Azul in book 3, actually willing to compromise. Out From Desert's Door - May 2024 Released a month after the first installment, I remember writing most of this in 2 weeks before I went on vacation. I don't think its the most interesting out of the 3 parts but necessary. Also decided to stick with the rhyming convention. (Floor, Door, Score)

The overheating idea was something I had when I first read book 4. like...they're sea creatures...in the desert...in 3 piece suits...how did they not pass out? So I put it in the story. Plus plot. Plus drama. Etc.

I read the official and fan translations of book 4 while writing this story. In the official translations Floyd doesn't curse but in one of the fan translations he says (roughly) 'It's hot as shit here.' and I thought it was funny, so I added Floyd cursing here.

Originally I had a fight scene written in this part. Someone would try to stop MC from entering, and Floyd would end up pouncing on them with Jade having to step in to stop them. I ended up cutting it after review with one of my friends, because it was a bit too ooc for Floyd to be as aggressive over a 'not-yet-friend, friend'

Kalim thinks MC's disappearance from the dorm is because they got sick. This is not actually the case, obviously, but to tell him the truth wouldn't be great for Azul, who's still trying to figure out if Jamil is actually the person responsible for everything. I'll talk about this more later.

Azul has complicated feelings about his appearance. This scene is meant to hint at that. Even after the events in book 3, he has issues around his weight and how others perceive him. (Which...is why he wears so many layers to hide his silhouette, at least according to my HC's of him)

Jade knows why Azul's so hesitant to remove his jacket. Jade's also the only one to realize what Azul's motivation was for wanting the photograph in book 3.

Though, he never outright says any of this in either cases.

I tried to make the trio's fighting style reflect their characters. Azul doesn't fight the students directly but holds them far enough so Jade and Floyd can pick them off one-by-one. Jade is also more analytical in battle than Floyd, who throws himself into it.

I also wanted to show how analytical Jamil is, too. Azul's downfall in book 3 started with Floyd being careless with his unique magic and damaging the safe. Here, Jamil uses Floyd's own magic against him so that the spell hits Azul. I honestly think Jamil could outclass Azul if given the right resources and time to plan.

Azul's stubborn (lol) he insisted on helping out the MC when they were hurt in the previous part but now refuses when the situation is flipped. Another way to show how little Azul trusts, how he sees everything as a trade off.

Jamil's already thinking 'what's your game?'. He's adamantly against the Octavinelle trio arriving and staying because he knows they can ruin his plans, and MC was the one who got them involved.

The characters explain it in the fic but I'll do it again here anyways.

MC and Grim dug their way out of scarabia, fled using one of the carpets, crash landed in octavinelle where MC broke their arm.

Kalim is not told this, and was told (by Azul) they were sick with octavinelle taking care of them. The reason for this is that 1) they would have to tell Kalim the real reason they broke out of scarabia (because they were sick of the training camp and being forced to stay) which would cause Kalim to potentially ease off on the training camp or call it off altogether. Jamil wouldn't want that, because that interferes with his plans to turn the dorm against Kalim. So why wouldn't Azul want that? Well he does, but it would be too hasty from the get go. If the camp was called off, Jamil could either do something drastic to remove Kalim, or he could lick his wounds and lay low until he has another opportunity to scheme. Neither of these are ideal, as Azul really wants concrete proof that Jamil is behind it, and doesn't want any room for Jamil to be able to wiggle out of it. Thus, Azul lies to Kalim so things keep going on as normal and until they can gather enough evidence to confirm their suspicions and confront Jamil directly.

(Also, when i read back the story of book 4, I realize that MC's escape attempt is never really brought up by anyone after the fact. Kalim is just like 'oh these octavinelle guys are here now, cool.' Makes me believe Jamil didn't tell Kalim to begin with).

I always got this sickly feeling from being trapped in Scarabia while playing the game, and that feeling never really went away even when the octotrio joined. I wanted to make it clear how much my version of Yuu hated that.

...this is something that I'll explore in a further series, whenever I get around to writing it. Hints at a previous or potential something between Jade and Azul.

Haha, I go through some of my old writing and forget how some sentences don't make any sense. I meant to say more like 'Those guys in octavnelle didn't break your arm, did they?' but I did a bad job at it, LOL. Maybe I'll go back and edit things in the future.

AKA: you should know because you witnessed his overblot and signed a contract with him

Kalim not realizing that others around him are suffering is a trend in book 4. He never realized Jamil wasn't happy in their childhood, and he doesn't realize how much Jamil sacrifices for him because of their difference in social status. He doesn't realize how much Jamil detests their relationship until it's too late. Likewise, he doesn't realize how 'bad' the training camp is until people are desperate enough -- like the MC -- to escape it. If Jamil didn't overblot and octavinelle didn't get involved, the training camp would have continued until the students despised him enough to overthrow him.

hinting that Jamil's using his unique magic in this scene, though not necessarily full force.

Azul and Jade both are concerned about the MC, as they're the two (traditional) love interests

The trio is so tightly knit that they can basically have conversations and assume what they want from each other without having to explicitly say it out loud.

It's not that he can't remove it physically, but that he can't because of his body issues, to be blunt.

'Crowley forcing you to make a contract' when I re-write book 3 (eventually...) I'll change up some things in it. I had this idea in mind when writing this series.

So, MC plays into Azul's little games. Makes a contract that he can 'fulfil' similar to the one in book 3. MC does something for Azul, Azul does something for MC after. (In book 3, it was: MC getting the photo, Azul releasing the students trapped in contracts) this time it's MC helping Azul, Azul takes them to the sea. It's a way to let MC help Azul without his whole...well, complex getting in the way of things.

The deal isn't 'official' (signed contract or handshake) but still Azul takes the ramshackle key as collateral. It's a way to show he's changed since book 3, just a little. But he still clings to his old habits.

Azul switches into octopus form, that's basically it. Could he have done this by himself? Yes. But he's embarrassed to do it around the twins and finds the presence of MC comforting enough to allow him to transform without freaking out. (Soooo romantic.)

Even when someone tells Azul he doesn't look ugly, he doesn't truly believe them.

...I would continue but there's a max photo count per post of 30! Who knew! See part 2 for the next section.

[crayonsquadlilac]

I had to scribble out his ending dialogue. I just couldn't lose this image i had in my head, of this poor charachter who tried his best still (for lack of a better word) dying, and not screaming or crying when it's happening but instead saying this and then gently apologizing, like it's his fault, and that's the last he ever says. I think this scene's gonna stick with me for a while.

I'm actually so sick about him like god like "I've wasted my whole life hiding, I think I should try saying hello." God. Me when the character is kind and well meaning and funny and silly and yet tragic by nature. Me when the character never gets the good ending they deserved (in a well written way.). What the Hell. God

Super Ultra Rambling under the readmore if you're curious about my elaborate Thoughts;

Ik is my favorite charachter because he is very silly and my best friend ever in the world but also because of the Tragedies. He's a person used to fear, a people pleaser, who let mr. Sob manipulate him and turn his hotel into something he never wanted, simply pretending it was still the same, who spends the whole game trying so hard to keep you in high spirits and unworried even when he himself is terrified. Someone who cares too much and tries so hard and probably never even gave nearly as much to himself as he did to others. Even at the end, as he describes to you all the horrors that unfolded on earth, he makes jokes and quips and keeps up his goofy manner of speaking despite the information clearly disturbing him.

When he tells you the story of his death, he never once mentions anything about how sad it is, and if you respond with "I'm sorry," he says like basically "oh it's fine," before hesitating with a concerned look on his face. His death may be something he avoids thinking about a lot.

And describing him, i can't help but relate to him, understand him, perhaps that's why I am so Insane about him right now.

I think this game is about, no matter what happens, at the end of it all it will still be the end. It may even end sooner than you'd expect. The human race before dying out solved all their problems and created a perfect world, Ik tried hard to do good and make people happy, Mr. Sob gained his own twisted control over many souls of the afterlife, you the player just kept going onward as much you could, but they all came to the same unceremonious end. I suppose it all matters on your perspective- do you focus on the ending, or how you got there?

When Ik tells you about his death, he describes how he saw the stars, and the view of his town from all the way high up, how he stopped and looked for a long time. But he couldn't stay forever, he had to keep moving. I think that's the part that mattered most. Even in so terrible a situation, he got something beautiful out of it. And like i guess part of the game is, "we can't stop what's coming, there's no use hiding, so we may as well face it with a smile and a greeting." Or maybe more like "the time will pass anyways" type of thing. If that makes sense.

I've seen some people interpret the Morning as everyone is brought to a final resting place peacefully. And of course, it's wide open for everyone to interpret it however, but for me personally I thiiiink Ik was probably right about it being the end of time. The thing seemed a little bit too obliterating-you-type-deal in the final cutscene. All the humans are dead and it's time for their afterlife to go too now. Maybe it's to make room for something that'll replace us, or to start over from scratch with everything, but for all the human souls, it's the end.

Maybe the sole survivor of all existence is Shrimp, in the afterlife, always running from the Morning, wandering for eternity. Which i say to be silly but also that would be really sad actually. He'd be alone... he'd get hungry and there'd be no one there to feed him lounge chairs and tables and glass vases..... poor shrimp..........

I don't know if it would have been better or worse if you could just find his abandoned collar on the ground somewhere before that last lantern. Probably worse actually. Yeah no I'm glad that's not a thing. I'm sorry for saying that.

But anyway, what a damn good game. I'm sad it didn't get more attention when it came out, it feels like such a passion project. I feel bad for only finding out it exists recently. I'll try my best with telling all my friends to play it too though. Cause like oh man. Good god. It made me laugh, it made me scared, and now it's made me cry, drawing and typing this post. It's a thinker. I love existential wonder in media, but this one is more like, existential indifference or something. but it doesn't feel cynical at all, i don't know. I like it a lot. Putting it right up there with my favorites.

also actually nevermind fuck all that noise good ending where the morning never comes and they just wander the woods forever together yippee wahoo!! who needs themes and messages and meanings !!!! when The Characters could be happy !!!!!!!

jtjfjfjdhdjskfskdkdsfdhdhsfjcjdhfhshsfhd everything is fine i am Fine definitely not Crying More why would you think that

[changeling-ethereal]

Request by: @jellibean2018

Hello, Jelli! About two months ago you sent in a request, however my tumbl did me dirty, and I ended up with your ask, and the entire fic deleted! (Though, much to my relief, I found screenshots of the fic in a chat with my friend who was reviewing it. Thank god).

So, I have to tag you, and remind you what you wanted.

From what I remember, you wanted a fic with a female sinner Reader who was once a victim of Alastor's, and the two ending up meeting again in hell. You also wanted an unsettling vibe with Alastor reveling in the memory of killing Reader.

I also want to add that I apologize for how long you had to wait for this fic to be done. I haven't been doing well with fics lately, so this was a struggle. And my mental health started going shit too which is why I stopped posting for so long...

Anyways, I really started to struggle with writing fics, so I ended up experimenting with this one - it's kind of written with huge metaphor kind of style? Hope that's okay with you...

Anyways, hope you'll enjoy reading this at least a little, and I once again apologize.

_

🎙️// The sweet history we share... //🎙️

{Alastor x female!Reader}

___________________________________________

Type: Fanfic

Settings: Not specified

Genre: Unsettling? Can't tell if it actually gives that vibe though,

!TRIGGER WARNING!: Mentions of cannibalism, murder, violence, blood, saliva, dead bodies, Alastor revels in the memory of killing Reader, possible yandere vibes? Alastor sees Reader as nothing but a meal, but he puts her on a pedestal - that's probably some kind of fucked up attachment that surely has a name? I'd say the vibe is quite unsettling, but I can't say that for sure, Angel indirectly suggests the use of drugs and hints at sex related activities (but it's just a single line), and that's probably all?

Sidenote: Reader is written as a female just as requested,

Sidenote: I have no idea if I wrote Alastor well... but it feels like I really made him ooc as fuck and ruined the whole request,

Sidenote: Rereading this I think everyone is ooc as fuck even if they have minimum dialogue,

_

That should be all,

Hope you'll enjoy,

___________________________________________

Ah, nostalgia. Ah that sweet nostalgia. And that embrace of her.

She comes in unannounced, an unexpected guest. But oh is she welcome.

And oh so welcome are those treats she brings to the table.

She easily settles in, making herself at home. And into a cup, a bunch of memories she pours.

And that demon, the radio demon as he's called - he drinks from that cup greedily.

And like a man dying of thirst, he can't help but ask for another cup to be poured.

His senses feel high, his body tingling. A feeling of addiction is what fills him.

And he can't get enough of those sweet memories, so, he downs one cup after the other.

But with each greedy little sip, the thirst only grows and grows - he's not had his fill still.

So, the demon goes on and on, tasting one memory after the other.

And his mouth waters a big deal the more he can taste, and he savours each and every one.

Ah, and he can't tell which one of the sips of memories he enjoys the most, which one is the most saliva inducing one.

Is it maybe the giddy old memory of how he followed you through the town?

With you completely unaware? Naively trusting those poorly enlightened streets?

Trusting that a bit of weak light will keep you safe?

Or perhaps it could be the sweet memory of the thrilling chase through the forest?

That one forest where thousands of dead bodies laid buried deep in the ground?

Those dead bodies in whose footsteps you followed suit?

Oh! And what about that memory of how you so desperately tried to navigate around and hide, escape his clutches?

Even if he could hear your sharp breaths as clear as the day?

Oh! Or maybe his favourite one could be the moment of when he tackled you down?

Pinning your body under his, finally cutting the chase so the real fun can begin?

And that beautiful moment of how you hopelessly dug your nails into his skin til blood trailed down his arms?

That one beautiful moment engraved into his head of how you desperately clawed at those lanky hands of his?

His hands that trailed, squeezed and pinched at your body, feeling you up like a winning prize, like a fine piece of venison?

Ah, it was so hard to pick which one was the most treasured one!

Hell, it could even be the simple memory of the melodious sounds of your cries.

That melodious, angelic sound of your pleading, whimpering, sobbing and screaming.

Especially those sounds you made when he bit down onto your flesh.

Oh, and that taste that hit his taste buds back then...

He still remembers it like it was yesterday.

And his tongue still tingles, and saliva still floods his mouth every time he thinks of just how tasty you were back then.

And now his mouth waters as he silently wonders... would you still have such taste even now?

Or did becoming a demon change the sweet, addictive flavour of your fragile flesh and thick blood?

Oh, how his senses urge him - beg him - to just grab you and take at least one single little bite...

I'd be really easy too, now that you're a part of the hotel staff.

Silly little you, you didn't flee when you were faced with the fact that he - the one who took your life - also works for the hell's princess now.

You didn't take the more than gracious chance to turn on your trail, run and never return while you still could.

No, you are too stubborn, and you insist on staying, even despite how frightening seeing him on the daily is for you.

Silly little you! Don't you realize how easily he could snatch you away and repeat history?

All it would take is a single moment of when you're alone and-

Ah, but he can't do that - at least not yet...

Where would be the fun in that?

It sure would be a shame to end your lovely reunion this fast and early on, no?

Not to mention the odd, messed up attachment the deer demon feels towards you...

Now, not to be mistaken! What he feels isn't the usual attachment one would think of!

It definitely isn't the good or healthy kind either...

So, we shall not be mistaken, let's not get our hopes up and think he cares - for he doesn't.

You mean nothing to him - at least as far as it comes to you as a person.

Your value could be most likely compared to something of a sentimental value, a plaything at best if you will.

Still, no matter what you are to him - you are by far his most favourite one at that.

That's what can be said for a fact.

And for reasons beyond us and even Alastor, those memories he shares with you are put on a pedestal - put way above the rest.

There were so many faces that twisted in fear, so many names he kept tabs on, so many tastes he's tried, and so many lives he's taken.

But very vast portion of them is long forgotten, not really standing out all that much.

Nor holding any real value. Barely any of them mattered...

But you, on the other hand - oh, he could never forget about that one lovely night you shared...

And even when more victims - more faces, more names, more tastes - came, they couldn't compare.

No, they never could.

Those memories of you and your taste were always stuck in the back of the radio demon's head no matter what new person was on the menu - what new dish was on his plate...

So, one can only imagine just what he feels now that you're back within his grasp.

Oh, not even his wildest fantasies could've come up with or prepare him for such sweet moment!

This was like a gift from the Devil himself!

Yes, a gift - one that Alastor would make sure to cherish greatly...

Ah yes, he would cherish you so.

He'd take his time unwrapping you like the perfect little gift that you are - he would savour you.

And only when he'd get tired of messing with you, only then he'd get to the real deal.

Oh, and when he'll finally do, it'll be like a starving man plunging onto bread crumbs!

It'll be such a beautiful, satisfactorily moment - Alastor can almost feel himself drooling at the mere thought of the moment.

Oh, how he just can't wait for the very moment!

The moment is so close, and yet so far - and every little glance your way is like a test.

A test of how long he can resist the temptation.

Every little move you make, every little noise that leaves you, every little expression your face twists into.

Oh, he can barely hold himself back!

His body feels so restless, and his thoughts are all over the place.

And no matter how much he reminds himself to be patient, to not cut straight to the chase just yet.

He still can barely keep himself in check.

His thoughts are going to dangerous places, and your familiar, sweet scent teases his nose.

Oh, and you're so within reach too!

It'd really just take a single little moment and-

"Geez, that perv's still at it?".

Oh, that's right.

He's almost forgotten about those curious eyes watching him from afar.

Watching, and trying to see inside his head...

But judging by the response Vaggie's hateful comment receives, it seems she's the only one to see right through him.

The only one to see the real danger behind that wide smile he always wears...

"Ya-uh! His eyes have not left her ever since she's joined the hotel staff!".

Ah, Charlie. Dear, sweet Charlie - now she's something else.

She's completely different from her girlfriend - she's quite naively trusting and optimistic.

Fully believing that there's a piece of good in everyone.

And hence not being concerned for your safety when the deer demon started to show an interest in you.

Ah, that sweet, silly little thing.

Caught up in trying to see only the best in people and their intentions...

It's amusing - and truly adorable.

And oh, does it play into Alastor's favour oh so well...

"Okay, that's like so sick and totally-".

Oh, Vaggie - she tries, she really tried to warn the others.

Make them see Alastor for what he truly is.

But aside from Husk, nobody really listens to Vaggie's concerns.

No, she's not all that listened to when she voices her opinions on the deer demon.

Not even when she expresses her concerns for how the latter constantly follows your every single step no matter the time of the day, no matter where you go...

And to think she has quite enough of a say in things as the hotel's manager, as well as the princess' girlfriend!

Oh, that poor little thing - it must be such an awful feeling.

How humorous!

And oh, how unfortunate...

"Ah! Do you think he's-?".

Niffty is completely on board with Charlie.

Similarly to the princess - she too doesn't see the real harm in Alastor's advances towards you.

Seeing his behaviour as nothing other than subtle romantic gestures.

The little demoness' version of romance sure is rather twisted...

And yet, it's still quite surprising Niffty doesn't see the harm in things.

After all, she herself knows Alastor just as well as Husk does...

"Yeah! Strawberry pimp totally got the hots for that one!".

Angel was caught up in the spiderweb of romanticizing the same thing as well.

Just like Charlie and Niffty, he couldn't see the truth...

"What? No! Are you all crazy?! That's not the case at all! How can you all not see that?!".

Oh, Vaggie - again and again, she really tries and tries.

But the result is always the same - nobody pays her warnings or concerns any thought.

And yet she still keeps on going.

What a miserable little thing she is.

"Oh my- I have like the best idea!".

Not even Charlie notices how Vaggie nearly begs for them all to see things from her point of view.

None of them can see things for what they really are.

Alastor's got them all right where he wants them.

Without even having to try much...

"We should totally get the two to have some alone time!".

Charlie is quick to naively play into the radio demon's games.

Without even knowing she's doing that.

She can't see this all is exactly what the deer demon wants...

And neither can Angel or Niffty.

Aw, those naive little fools...

"Yes! We should- like- create some really romantic atmosphere and leave them to it!".

Niffty follows through in Charlie's steps.

She too plays right into what Alastor wants.

Though whether or not she's aware of it is up for a debate...

"We should lock 'em up in a closet together or somethin', or even give them a little... somethin'... to just... ya know, set just the right mood in.".

And angel is quick to fall for Alastor's games too...

Ah, those silly fools...

Unaware they're making all this much easier than it should've been.

They're sealing your doom - the inevitable end you're ought to meet at his clutches.

They're making this all too easy...

They're shoving the little mouse right into the lion's den.

What unfortunate silly fools.

And what an unfortunate little you.

Your friends are serving you to him on a silver platter.

All of them - or nearly all of them - thinking they're doing you a favour.

Thinking they're simply helping a mere fool in love gain the heart of his love interest.

When in reality, they're actually helping a starving predator get closer to his chosen prey...

It was rather humorous - a good source of entertainment for sure.

So, Alastor would humour the group.

He'd indulge in their schemes of trying to set you up with him.

He'd gladly play along and lead them to think he's interested in you.

Well, interested in you they way they think he is, not the way he actually is...

No, they can't know what he actually wants from you.

They won't know.

He'll make sure of it.

They won't know until the very last moment, until the deed's already done.

Or, he'll lead them to think your disappearance has nothing to do with him.

After all, the sudden disappearance of a poor little sinner like you would be nothing new in hell.

You'd just be added to the endlessly growing numbers of hell inhabitants going missing.

Your disappearance would be just a part of the mere statistics.

Well, he'll see.

All depends on which option would prove to bring more benefit.

As well as which one would prove to be more entertaining.

That's what, to the deer demon, matters the most at the end of the day.

For now, he'll just go with the flow and let the situation progress by itself.

With the occasional shove to the right direction, of course.

But it doesn't seem like he needs to wait for that long for everything to be set in motion...

"Hey, Al, you got a minute?".

Yeah, he really doesn't need to wait for that long...

___________________________________________

[happypotato48]

Theory of Love Romcom Watch Along Episode 5 : 10 Things I Hate About You (Lazy Unhinged Edition)

Well well well well well well well well well (somebody stop me) well well well. It's 10 Things i Hate About You time, i haven't watch this movie since i was a wee little lad and i can say with my whole chest that this movie mostly hold up despite me not being snarky 15 years old anymore (i'm still snarky just not 15 anymore T_T) unlike many of my friends that participate in this project i'm probably the least familiar with shakespeare's works which i like to ratify soon since i tend to enjoys shakespeare modern adaptations and references. like my biggest fictional sad old man crush is based on Prospero from the Tempest ffs. anyway one thing that stuck out to as very positive for me from this movie is how poetically it feels i never read the The Taming of the Shrew but i noticed some line that probably came from the play, the well written scripts and the dialogues feels witty and sharp this movie did came off as a very well done modern (1999) take of shakespeare work.

Now to a side segment just for this week it's time to throw shades at Mr. Jojo Tichakorn as i had promised my good friend @lurkingshan. THK, The Heart forking Killers. first let let me say some positive stuff so some of you nerds would know that i'm not just a hater (i'm a snarky slightly crazy bitch that hope one day these posts would not come back and bite me in the ass when i enter the BL industry.)

THK mostly did an ok Job as adaptations/inspired by of 10 Things i Hate About You, some emotion do works well translate from the movie and i will give credit where the credit due i think the fall out and the resolution after the lie got discovered is handled pretty good in the show unlike the movie where it feels rushed and half baked.

Ok now after i said the all nice things let get mean!! most of THK dialogues are lame AF. it's like someone took a lot of the wittiness of the movie out and replaced that with lame tired and cliche BL dialogues. most of the actors ate their roles but even that some lines feels listless and lack flair. instead of charm the show sometime came off as trying too hard or trying too little to be charming. and that is the problem Thai language as a tonal language has a lot of possibility to do and says so much more interesting stuff but because it's a GMMTV show the dialogues feels stripped of any potential and ended up being generic and sanitized.

I'm the same with @solitaryandwandering feelling about the side stories. i'm so bored with them, i love you mike with all my heart but i can't spend another minute watching you and what her face hitting on each other. that being said i'm still intrigued by our main fuckboi Khai and loser with zero braincell Third even tho they're aggravating me so much. Khai continuingly semi unpurposefully hurts Third but the crack starts to show in this ep that he seems to some degree to know what is going on with Third.

In Thai he says "When he came to sleep with me like a wife, then i'd talk nicely to him." Khai maybe is in deny or he just an absolute asshole that let his subconscious hurts Third this badly. but it's clear he is catching up and acting out on purpose. and Third in his infinitely dumbassery refused to uses his god danm words. and the end those two ended were they always do uncommunicative and stuck in the a cycle of this toxic friendships. these two needs time out and spend time apart to reevaluate themselves and grows as people before i'd buy any kind of kind romantic relationship. but this is a BL sooo let see where this goes.

[luciaintheskyainthi]

Hii, i admire you a lot, every chapter of ECM encourages me a lot, i hope yo are well and im sorry for the bad english in my cuestion😭

Your best writing tips? Everything is valid, whether writing in general o writing fanfics, whatever you think for sure is good, thanks for writing 🙏💗😔

thank-you so much!! I'm glad my writing can do that for you!!

Oh man, I have soooo many things to say, but I'll give you some simplified ones to start with! Buckle up buttercup, this is a long'un!

General Writing Tips:

I know it sounds dumb! But just write. Write a little, write a lot, just try not to get bogged down with it being 'good' or 'bad' or anywhere in between. I'm a firm believer in writing being like a muscle: the more you do it, the easier (and the better) it becomes. And also, crucially, this shouldn't be a time where you do things like... a) hunting for the perfect word b) doing research c) cross reference with a past chapter This is a writing only time! Make yourself place holders (I write XK for words I can't think of, as it's 2 letter that will never appear together so I can CTRL+F it easily! I make comments in the draft specifying what to check or research. I highlight parts I know need LOTS of work) so you can quickly move past what's blocking you and continue writing.

Find a writing habit and environment that works for you. Typing? Hand-writing? Coloured pages? White pages? Dictating? Working in a public place? A private space? (When I start out a story, I often handwrite. And I'll turn back to it if I'm stuck, too. I also write a lot in public, as I find the pressure of other people around me stops me wasting time on my phone... or Tumblr lol).

Get yourself a writing friend! I have a friend I see almost weekly and it's my most productive time of the week (For example, today I wrote 5600 words! Crazy!). Online works too (if you use the pomodoro, you can compare word counts, make a competition of it). If you're doing it IRL, DO NOT expect to get anything done the first time. Or the second time.... but the more you do it, the easier it is for you both to fall straight into writing. (This is the exact same advice I giving to my students about 'study dates' 😉 )

If you find it hard to 'break the seal', then try a warm up. Set yourself a 5-10 minute timer and write based on an activity. E.g. tell a story from the POV of an object in your room! Write a detailed description of your foot! Write a 5 sentence story! Find a picture and write a scene inspired by it! Or get yourself a prompt list and use that. These are all things I would do for students back when I ran a creative writing club at school.

Use the pomodoro system when writing (it's great for studying too!). That's 20 minutes of nothing but writing - no searching up stuff! No looking at your phone! Just writing. Then take a 5 minute break. Then another 20 minutes of writing. Rinse and Repeat! You'd be amazed at how much you can get done!

THIS ONE IS SO IMPORTANT: 👏 The first thing you write is the worst thing you write! That's not just okay! It's expected!! 👏 This is something I tell ALL my students and equally myself. The editing process is SO crucial and honestly, the best thing you can do to improve is - and you'll hate me for saying this! - rewrite your entire first draft. This is why I say, 'don't worry about the first thing you've written'. Because it won't be the end product. (This is why I so often hand-write. Because typing it up then becomes the rewrite.) The re-write is when you should be thinking carefully about your phrasing, and when you can go and do that research. (I will note, I actually don't do this much anymore, but I've also been writing obsessively for 19 years... so do with that what you will (´▽`ʃ♡ƪ)

Read your work out loud. What reads fine in your head might come out as nonsense out loud. This is especially true for dialogue! The better it flows out your fabulous mouth, the better it reads. I've done this so much I've mostly internalised it, but I always always do my final edit as a read through out loud. All 140+K of ECM has come out my gob at least once.

Actual writing tips:

When it comes to sentence structure and phrasing, one of the best things I ever did for myself was read the book Sin and Syntax by Constance Hale. I don't expect every writer to do so, but I do think it's worth reading (I'd like to specify, I generally HATE reading non-fiction but I found it a valuable read).

Here are a few things to keep in mind when actually writing:

Bad repetition: it's a classic, but overuse of certain words sticks out like a sore thumb. Even now I'll do it and won't notice until the final read through (out loud! See my previous tip haha). That is NOT to say that you should just right click 'synonyms'! It's better to edit the sentence itself, think about whether that word is even necessary before choosing to select another word).

Nuance in language is soooo important. This is why I generally discourage just the right-click 'synonym' option. Certainly in the nonsensical English language, there are subtleties in word choice that are critical to preventing your work for turning into nonsense (something I wish my students would understand!). Think of the different meanings conveyed through choices like house / bungalow / condo / flat / apartment / mansion / Mcmansion. All have differing connotations and can't be used interchangeably. Same with floor vs ground. Make sure you understand the connotations (associated meanings) of the word you're choosing before you use it.

Following on from this, Choose specific nouns and dynamic verbs, rather than relying on your adjectives/adverbs to do all the work. Not ' one storey house': bungalow. Not 'walk tiredly': stumble / trudge. Of course, you don't have to do this all the time and I'm not saying adverbs/adjectives are evil! But I think a lot of writers become overly reliant upon them.

Avoid redundant language. Consider the words that are doing the heavy lifting in your sentences. Is there anything in the sentence that doesn't need to be there because you've already implied it? e.g. Sara trudged tiredly into her bedroom and fell onto her bed. In this example, 'trudged' already implies exhaustion. And one would assume her bed is in her bedroom. Likewise 'fall' isn't the most exciting of verbs. So I'd change it to something like this -> Sara trudged through the doorway to collapse onto her bed. (Note here I'm also thinking of the implied meaning of 'onto' rather than 'into', which would suggest her bed is still made up).

Keep in mind who your narrator is and adjust your writing accordingly. Consider their personality, their background and the influence of their culture on the ways in which they'd think / write things. For example, as Peter is a character prone to ramble, I'll sometimes have him do the same in his narration. And because he's a silly little guy, I'll also have his train of thoughts turn in silly ways. His science background means I'll occasionally throw in a science reference too (though it's not my strongest knowledge base these days! So it requires more research lol). In contrast, Jason's love of literature make him more likely to use 'fancy' words like 'eschew', literary references and more elaborate metaphors. But at the same time, his Crime Alley upbringing means I have him use a lot of contractions. And because I see him as a character who is both a dramatic bastard and a highly efficient guy, I will use a lot of one word, or very short sentences. (If you're using multiple narrators, it might pay to write these ideas down!)

Anyways, I could go on, but it's also 20 to 11PM here and I've already written 5600 words today 🥲 My phalanges are tired!

I at least hope you can find something helpful or encouraging from all of this!

[prettycottonmouthlamia]

I am now at least far enough away from the incident that I can give some more articulately expressed opinions about Kriemhild and that part of Traum, and also my general bugbears when it comes to Higashide. To really elaborate on them, I want to make a point of comparison to show this isn't just like, bias getting in the way, and that's Caster.

Well Medea. Obviously.

Caster has a really big advantage going for her over characters such as Semiramis and Kriemhild. She has two gigantic and well-written visual novels backing her up. While the first thing you probably think of when it comes to Caster is her relationship to Kuzuki, you can probably think of a bunch of different things that you know Caster for. Caster's relationship to Kuzuki is a big part of her character, but it is not the only part of her character, and most importantly, it adds to her character. It is in and of itself a jumping off point for discussing her relationship with Jason, how that has affected her, and what Caster is looking at her future for.

Bu it's not her entire character. She still has a very complex relationship with Saber, and Hollow Ataraxia's character interactions with her and the rest of the cast are all interesting, not to mention her own interactions with Kojirou either. She exists as a character beyond that, and that is also very likely why Kuzuki is just not a factor in F/GO at all. She is a strongly written character that is recognizable without him.

When it comes to Semiramis and Amakusa, Apocrypha itself is written fine although I don't really believe in the two of them having real chemistry with each other, especially as time has gone on and more of Semiramis backstory has come out, Amakusa feels very written in but without the proper framing to me to make it work. But as time has gone up, unlike with Caster, Semiramis has had her entire character swallowed up by this relationship, even though canonically she shouldn't really remember it. This is obviously to some extent fanservice, but this is a problem, because it means that Semiramis stops existing as her own character. There are entire interludes about her history that are boiled down at the end to just being about Amakusa. If you want to know Semiramis like you would Caster, you can't.

A good relationship adds to the character, it does not BECOME the character. This is especially weird because Amakusa has had a lot of interesting screen time and character writing without Semiramis being present. It starts to feel like there's only really one important character in the mix. There's Amakusa, and Amakusa's girlfriend. That's weird.

Kriemhild is that on turbo, but the issues with her writing go even further. At least with Semiramis, while her relationship with Amakusa is strange, it's not necessarily contradictory. It's definitely odd, but not out of question. Kriemhild, especially for those who have summoned her and didn't go through Traum quickly, is in a contradictory boat. She clearly in her dialogues does not like Siegfried, even if she still loves him, and it's also clear he is directly responsible for a ton of hurt that she felt. This is consistent of what we know of Siegfried, it makes sense that he would do these things, we've already seen him do it in Apocrypha. Here, we are being asked to confront the human cost of that. In Apocrypha, he's not screwing over anyone we care about. But here, he's directly hurting people, and by extension, leading to their death.

Siegfried's actions are not portrayed particularly nobly, they're considered mistakes, at least in part chiefly by Siegfried who wants to live a life doing the right thing now. So it makes sense that Kriemhild would be extremely bitter and angry at him. He...abandoned her, and didn't even explain himself. That's extremely fucked up.

For almost the entire chapter in Traum, we're not given any indication that there is going be a flip-flop in character motivations. Kriemhild is portrayed, consistently, as being antagonistic to Siegfried. She wants her revenge on him, she calls him leftovers, she talks about destroying the world he keeps trying to save. Zhang Jue hides away Siegfried not because he believes that Kriemhild will turn on the realm for him, but because, as a Berserker, Kriemhild is likely to become extremely unstable upon seeing him.

Even later on, when Siegfried approaches Ritsuka and asks for a favor, the most likely conclusion to come to, knowing Siegfried, is that he wants to fulfill his wife's revenge. That makes sense from a character perspective. Siegfried's actions have consistently trended towards those that self-sacrifice to protect others.

The problem when it comes to Kriemhild is that it is both contradictory to what we've been communicated with in the story, and that the end result is that it destroys her character. It is both bad, and quite frankly, very cheap. It's a cheap use of the love conquers all trope. In the span of one to two sentences, Kriemhild implicitly forgives him for everyone that he's done, reverts to a lovey-dovey wife, and even reneges on everything that to this build are the foundation of her existence as a Servant.

It turns Kriemhild into nothing, into what is insanely flat, because all of her depth has been removed. What is left is a character that is entirely one-dimensional. Nothing exists for Kriemhild past her love of Siegfried anymore. There's no discussions about hurt or pain or the twenty years of vengeance beyond Kriemhild immediately turning a double face on it.

There's not a nicer way to put this, so let's just get it out of the way now. Siegfried will continue to be a character independent of Kriemhild. Unlike say, Sigurd, whose character is primarily defined on his relationship with Brynhildr, Siegfried's character is not defined really at all by his relationship to Kriemhild. Kriemhild has no path from here, and as we can glimpse in further events, her character is entirely defined by her relationship with Siegfried. What are her character motivations past this point? Well obviously its not ANY of the ones we took pain to previously establish.

This is classic, textbook, misogynistic writing. Kriemhild has been turned into a lamp.

Siegfried is a very popular character, and I imagine for a lot of people, there is incentive to ignore all of this. Siegfried is getting his happy ending, he's getting his wife back. But if you cared about what Kriemhild's character was, this sucks tremendously. Reconciliation is not off the table, but what happened is not reconciliation. It's not anything resembling that. Kriemhild essentially loses all of her agency, so dramatically she dies after this happens.

Like at least Urobuchi would have just killed her.

[greatwyrmgold]

Gnosia Characters, ranked by how much I like them

1. Raqio

I'm surprised. My first impression of them was that they were abrasive and rude and needlessly antagonistic. And all of that is still true, and they don't have a tragic backstory or other profound explanation for being like that.

I just kinda...like them now? Partly it's because they keep getting dunked on in a lot of loops, regardless of whether they've been rude or not. It gave me the sense that people were mean to Raqio no matter how they acted, so at some point they stopped giving a shit about how people saw them.

Then I thought about their top-tier Logic, with correspondingly pathetic (social) Intuition and general people-skills, and I realized they're autistic as hell.

2. Comet

She's the character I expected to like best. She's a cheerful extrovert with a neat, colorful design. Also she has a weird slime living in her. For most of the game, I didn't see anything past that surface level. It seemed like she was a flat genki girl.

Then at some point (I think during the "Adventure in a Frozen World" event?), I realized that Comet was suspiciously cavalier about death specifically, and realized that she was desensitized from growing up in Slime Hell. She spent her whole life expecting to die any day, and she keeps living like that. She keeps living like that!

3. Setsu

Setsu is basically the main character of the entire game. Sure, [playername] technically does more main-character things, but mostly at Setsu's instruction. Setsu features heavily in everyone else's Notes because they need to do all main-character things that can't be left to a blank slate. Setsu gets so much focus that of course they're going to be more developed than other characters.

But, well, it is what it is. Setsu gets a lot of focus and development. They usually seem jaded and aloof, but we see plenty of situations where they aren't (mostly either scenes alone with the player or from their first loop). They have moments of pragmatism and moments of passion. They feel like a real person, without feeling generic.

4. SQ

Unlike Raqio, SQ does have a tragic backstory and other profound explanations for being like that. She's a one-year-old growth-vat child in an adult woman's body, with a bit of her mom's consciousness lurking in her brain (or sometimes taking full control). And she's spent her whole life alone and on the run.

Unfortunately, that doesn't actually come up much. Most of SQ's dialogue has to work equally well for human SQ as it does for Gnosia Maman, after all! And Manan, the aforementioned mother who has been moving her consciousness between bodies for Gnos knows how long, doesn't have a lot in common with SQ except her façade.

So outside the two scenes which can only trigger if SQ is human (and the two that only trigger if SQ is Gnosia, I guess), we really only see the façade. And that façade would not be a very interesting character, even if we didn't know it was just a narrow shell hiding either a lonely child or an ambiguously megalomaniacal parent.

Which I guess is as good a place as any to say that I don't like Manan either. She's a formative character in Remnan and SQ's backstories, and also a keystone of the True Ending. But she's just...kind of a vaguely-implied malevolent presence? This despite the fact that she's technically present in any loop where SQ is Gnosia—but again, she can't be written as Manan outside a couple of Note events (where she mostly acts like her façade but more sadistic, which might just be the Gnosia's influence).

Is SQ's façade just Manan's personality? Or is it a façade Manan also uses to avoid seeming like the predatory supervillain that she's implied to be? Who knows!

5. Yuriko

I'm a little disappointed that she turned out to be less plot-relevant than I'd expected. But on the bright side, that means she can remain mysterious.

What is her deal? Her knowledge of Gnosia lore makes sense, since she was a Hoshibune shrine maiden. But there are a lot of other, non-Gnos-related things she's clearly aware of. She knows there were two [playername]s before [playername] does, for instance, and she knows about their Tutorial Plot Armor. Yuriko also has what seem to be magic powers; she can strip that plot armor, and make other people aware of the [playername] paradox, and if you're a Bug she can let you relive past memories or reassign your stats.

To some extent, all of that can be handwaved with Doylist reasoning. Petit Depotto wanted you to be able to reassign stats if you wanted to, but didn't want to make it too easy. A night event with Yuriko as a Bug is a little convoluted, but it's not hard if you're trying, and there's enough weirdness between Yuriko and the Bug role for that to make that not feel arbitrary. Same deal with losing Tutorial Plot Armor and re-viewing significant story scenes and expositing about time paradox things no one should be able to know.

But Yuriko also knows Kukrushka is a living doll. Somehow. There's no easy Doylist handwave for that; it's just a thing Yuriko knows, somehow. Either Yuriko knows a lot of weird things she didn't learn aboard the Hoshibune, or she has some kind of magic sense for when people aren't fully human.

And then there's her personality. She has one! A lot of that is tied up in the mysterious-mystic stuff she has going on, but there are details that don't fit neatly into that mold. In particular, her misanthropic streak. Whether she's human or Gnosia, she has several bits of incidental dialogue which indicate outright disdain for humans/humnaity. When asked if she's human, she says "Yes, unfortunately." When she's sent to cold sleep, she complains about "damned humans". Even when she's human. Why does she do that?

6. Sha-Ming

Even more than Raqio, Sha-Ming has no redeeming qualities. But he's fun to hate and easy to mock, so I've developed a twisted fondness for him.

7. Remnan

A weird engineer recluse who's also a traumatized abuse survivor and also kind of a dick.

Remnan has a pretty long and thinly-sketched backstory; he lived as Manan's pet/victim for a while, then escaped somehow and worked on a spaceship for most of a century. And his personality is pretty much what you'd expect from someone who responded to years of intimate abuse by embracing a life of solitude.

I kinda want to write a fic where Remnan and SQ end up in a situation together, and Remnan is uncomfortable because SQ reminds him of Manan, but eventually SQ's façade breaks and Remnan realizes that she's as much a victim of Manan's abuse as he is, and he stops being actively afraid of her.

8. Gina

Gina is nice. She's a nice introvert with purple hair and a deeply space-religious mother. That is most of her characterization.

I don't dislike her; she's probably the Gnosia character I'd most like to hang out with. But there's not much for me to rotate in my head, you know?

9. Stella

She made a good first impression. She's nice! She's green! She has a suspiciously specific response to people asking if she's human!

But she's kinda just...there. A nice girl who is secretly also the ship's AI. And she's in love with the captain I guess. You can do better, hon.

10. Otome

Only noteworthy for what she adds to the setting. "Intellectualized" animals exist, but they're not really normalized; she has way too much angst about whether she's "human" for sophont belugas to be just another Kind Of Guy.

11. Chipie

...I struggle to think of anything to say about him.

12. Jonas

He's weird, but not in a way that compels me. I don't get the sense that he's playing a role, or that his experiences have shaped him into the eccentric captain we see before us. I get the sense that he's Just Weird, and that's all the depth he has.

13. Shigemichi

He's also weird, in a different way than Jonas, but still not one that compels me. I don't know what to think of him, honestly. He's...also nice? He's not good, he's not bad, he's just nice.

Shigemichi just doesn't stand out. His personality is Comet, without any texture on his friendly positivity. His transformation into a "gray" is something, but it's overshadowed by transformations that feel less arbitrary, more motivated.

His dad deciding to get the alien skin graft for his kid could be interesting, but Shigemichi is uncomplicatedly happy about it, which negates pretty much all of that possibility-space. Shigemichi didn't choose his transformation, but he doesn't seem to care much about it.

14. Kukrushka

There are characters who don't say much, in a way that makes me wonder what's going on in their heads. But there are also characters who don't say much, in a way that makes me unable to think of them as characters in their own right.

She feels like more of a plot device than a character. An empty shell, a doll whose role shifts based on the mood of the child playing with her.

Like, that time she killed everyone except Remnan. That was probably a Manan thing, right? But is Kukrushka always Manan, or did Manan pop out of SQ and into the other Kukrushka, somehow? Or was Kukrushka not Manan at all, and just some random doll-girl who also wants to make Remnan her plaything, because he has that vibe?

Does Manan slip so easily into Kukrushka's frame because it's empty? Or because she was Arya, the girl Jonas loved, and the doll was made to look like her? Or just because the writers needed a way to get rid of both Gnosia!SQ and the Silver Key without anyone dying?

Are there answers to these questions? Or is Kukrushka just the negative space between the roles she was written to fill?