#I can't say it's really finished
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Scholarly peak is catching up on recent literature
#bingqiu#shen qingqiu#luo binghe#svsss#sqq#lbh#my art#which is honestly just to say that i've finished the other two print books i was reading#and am now prepared to leap feet first into svsss bk4#i succeeded in holding off for an entire two weeks. i have the conviction of a wet paper towel.#lets see bk4 was described as - what? - an ''angst and smut pile''??#i am very much looking forward to this#i was promised a story with my snake boy#because i am very much not over zhuzhi-lang's fate so this had better be A REALLY NICE HAPPY ONE FOLKS#anyway have sqq and lbh cuddling and reading as i project on them#i like to assume that as time goes on sqq is able to relax his persona a bit more around lbh#i think he should get to cuddle and bitch about shitty novels#but man sqh is really the ONLY source of any books that have an even slightly modern cadence/style i have a feeling sqq would be very keen#though if i'm being honest i really wonder if sqh could ever bring himself to write fiction again#if you're A Writer it tends to be hard to RESIST you just get an itch to tell a story#but also like... the fear that all of this could happen again... or that the characters you're creating might be REAL and SUFFERING...#yeah... i honestly suspect he can't write anymore and that it honestly probably sucks a lot... but for the sake of this joke he is :P
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overgrowth and languor
[recommended you click and zoom] (alt versions below)
#art#my art#artists on tumblr#digital art#eyestrain#HI i am So kinda proud of this actually#still can't tell if it looks nice but!!!#//click and zoom piece again !! i was starting to think i had just given up on ever doing that again hvbhs#//!!!!#so happy i've finally finished it yay!!!#ik i used to average like working 2 days on a piece at one point but i was not nonstop-working on those so lol#//tried something with the background!!#and the inks!!#drew a cat which is very swag!!#the colours are a WHOLE new thing and i love colours that are yellow on the wheel but brown on the canvas!!#REALLY love the blue one (i wanted to have a night version and that's close enough :D)!!#i like the little orange painting in the background (a LOT)!!#overall i am changing my verdict and saying Yeah i AM happy with this lol#//but yeah gonna go post on artstreet now lol :3
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(ID in alt) I literally said I was gonna post this month's ago and then never had the wherewithal to describe it and so I didn't Lmao (said with pain). But since I'm thinking of opening my commissions I figured I should remind ppl that I. Yknow. Can draw.
Lots of Steph here (I had major art block making all of these and my brain worms for her kept me going) + some sprinkles of stephcass for Cass nation to enjoy!
#dc comics#dc#stephanie brown#cassandra cain#jason todd#(yes for the teddy bear. it counts)#batgirl#batgirls#mine#< keep forgetting to tag my art as that I'm terrible 😭#ANYHOW I'm slowly getting back into drawing again after my last ipad got nuked (cant think abt that or ill cry) and i finished uni#oh yeah j finished my first year of uni btw. i went to an Olivia Rodrigo concert like a week or 2 ago. I've been busy lol#but yeah it's looking like I've got a fun summer of bottom feeding ahead of me now that I've officially been told i got passed over for that#-comic job i applied for. lol. lmao even#it's fine honestly it was a pretty daunting prospect i just have to find a way to fill the time by myself now#I've plenty of comics to read so that's nice. got wayyy into mark waids DD run recently (mostly for Chris Samnee's art)#so that's been fun! i have my empowered omnibus (embarrassing and kept under my bed <3) i have TT year 1 i have huntress and WW#uhhh i got flash 1 minute war. lots of good stuff!#so hopefully i don't go. completely feral from lack of stimulation#also hopefully commissions will be a thing i can do#godddd there's many mkre things i want to draw. i got too enamoured w my own bad theory and now I've drawn tim!bats#but unfortunately now i only want to draw tim!bats being laughed at my the batfamily bc seriously tim?? really??#< it's literally probably not going to happen but I've invested myself in this terrible future for some reason#imagine damian trying to robin for tim!bats for 1 (one) night and the next morning he doesn't say anything he just moves to bludhaven#he can't take this shit#oh so many ideas...#ANYWAY. ues. finally art. now if you like it. consider commissioning me (in 2 to 3 business weeks <3)#(no pressure)
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a little divine appreciation
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God Gale is endgame for Mayhew, and Mayhew couldn't be more pleased 😌
their mutual wizard disease brought them to some pretty low lows, but hey, ignore the tragedy, they're gods now! first order of business is a little worshiping at the altar 😏
Here's the sketch, which I also like:
Got majorly inspired by these lovely photos, one of which I used as a pose reference.
#mayhew#will have a different godly form once i settle on some details. and finish writing the fic about this#but may i just say i adore god gale? he's the worst version of himself and he'll never see it and i love that for him#plus i really love gods of volatile neutral traits like ambition that could amplify good and bad acts by turn#mayhew's portfolio is similar - curiosity. no way that could go wrong when paired with ambition! they're the questionable judgement duo#but mayhew's got an enormous heart so on the whole more good is put into the world than bad. ...usually.#can't take the wizard out of a wizard#anyway hi hello to all the god gale fans out there. there will be more fanart for sure#also can you tell I adore drawing body hair? i hope you can#my art#gale dekarios#gale of waterdeep#bg3#baldur's gate 3#gale x tav#gnome tav#gnomeposting#galehew
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Why The Ending Sucks
Ok I figured it out. Hear me out:
The entire comic has a running theme best summed up as "who is controlling the narrative, and why are we listening to them?"
Hussie plays a caricaturized version of himself that he describes as "buffoonish" and "oafish". Caricature!Hussie is well-meaning, but a dumb idiot who's incredibly biased in favor of certain characters and in disfavor of others (the most obvious example being his "love" of Vriska, but there's also the way he constantly disparages Eridan). As a result, you have to be VERY SKEPTICAL and VERY CAREFUL when approaching Homestuck's narration, because even when the "best" narrator is at the helm, he's not 100% trustworthy and incapable of giving the readers an unbiased view of the story.
I say "best" because, importantly, Hussie isn't the story's only narrator. He and Doc Scratch explicitly fight over control of the story - Doc Scratch, the child abusing predator who engineered Alternia's fascist murder society, whose shaping of its history is explicitly described by character!Hussie as "fanfic". He is then killed by Lord English, who is described by Hussie as embodying the "toxically masculine" and by extension, the patriarchy, and Caliborn explicitly takes control of the story. John even grapples with Caliborn's version of events, calling out how sexist and misogynistic and shitty it is.
So if we're keeping score: control over the narrative is LITERALLY wrested away from Hussie (who was already struggling to be unbiased) by fascists, abusers, and the patriarchy. It's stressed multiple times that Caliborn/LE are responsible for literally everything that ever happens; the reason the Game Over timeline ends the way that it does is because the alpha timeline is, in essence, the narrative LE is telling: the forces of fascism get to claim the new universe, thereby propogating itself, while friendship dies and all hope is lost.
Who's in control of the narrative, and why are we listening to them?
There are other minor examples of this, too: Aranea is an exposition fairy, and she's biased as fuck and wrong ALL THE TIME about her own teammates. Karkat's explanations and rationalizations are constantly tinged with his own self-loathing and self-blame. Sollux and Meulin are both prophets as per their Mage class, but are both so bogged down by their own emotional issues that the futures they pick out are actively harmful. So on and so on. At nearly every turn, you have to interrogate who's telling the story, what their motivations are, and what they're overlooking or deliberately obfuscating.
So given that this theme is so prevalent, and so thoroughly weighted toward "well, actually, maybe you shouldn't take narration at face value and should interrogate it and come to your own conclusions," it would be Really Weird for the story to go "actually, you can totally trust the narrative now because everyone gets a happy ending".
So, I know that it makes me sound like a conspiracy theorist, but here's my genuine take on Homestuck's ending:
The ending is shitty on purpose because the viewer is intended to take it as a dare to refute the narration and make something better.
Why are we letting character!Hussie tell the story? He's a biased idiot. Why are we letting the various avatars of LE and Caliborn tell the story? They're fascist, misogynistic, predatory assholes.
And - because Homestuck is a story about life - why are we letting idiots, assholes, abusers, and creeps dictate the story of real life? The world is full of forces that would try to take control of the story and make everyone else play along, represented in microcosm within the text of Homestuck. We cannot let those forces win.
So please go out and do something kind and hopeful and loving in the world today. Thanks for reading.
#homestuck#homestuck lore#homestuck analysis#anyway i know that this sounds Crazy but hear me out#Hussie does not drop the act in the book commentaries#which were written after the comic ended#moreover the ending and epilogues are chock full of stuff that really seems designed to piss off as many people as possible#like vriska coming back but having her character development reverted#which upset both vriska haters AND vriska fans#and famously the existence of Yiffany which lowkey fucks up rosemary#but the baffling thing is that in spite of these 'lets make everyone unhappy' moves#we're still getting vital exposition about how the world works (ultimate selfhood) and characters outright saying things like#it confused me for the longest time but looking at this running theme it makes sense#the ending of homestuck is the ending picked out by terezi... who never finished her arc#it's why even though it's LITERALLY the ending she picked out for herself and her friends#shes still unable to be happy in it or feel 'fixed'#because she too is unreliable!!! she can't do it alone!!!!#and bringing back vriska eased her guilt but didnt solve her fundamental issues...#because homestuck kinda can't have a happy ending unless EVERYONE IS THERE
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song about something you'll never be forgiven for. beepbox link here, and a singalong under the read more :''-)
starting point "…so don't look back" i took your hand and led you astray into the light i fear i might have made a fatal mistake walk in a straight line walk in a straight line i couldn't ask i only hope that sinners are saved but in all honesty, my honor keeps me somewhat afraid walk in a straight line don't dare look behind ♫♫♫ i had a dream we tried to reach the finishing line but in the silence still the time we killed had come back to life walk in a straight line walk in a straight line the signs had merged into a single "end of the world" where every undead thing was damned to sing "esrever ni gnos a" walk in a straight line …tell me that you're fine ♫♫♫ walk in a straight line (walk in a straight line) don't dare look behind (don't dare look behind) tell me that you're fine (something that had died) you're still breathing right? (are you satisfied?) walk between the lines (how to save a life) don't dare look behind (change the ending line) reach the end this time (tell a little lie) bring me back to life… ♫♫♫ if i'd look back and held the hands that led me astray into the light i'd proudly cry "this is my final mistake" walk with me this time walk with me this time i should have asked i know the answer's somewhat cliché but was it worth the price and worth the pain? you're fading away— walk with me this time bring me back to life… if i'd look back… if i'd look back… if i'd look back… if i'd look back… if i'd look back… if you'd look--
#i've been sitting on this song for a while now... i really wanted to make a video for it but it's late and i can't afford to stay up#for much longer. and i know if i leave this for tomorrow it won't get finished until like. 839482394 months later.#i'm just glad i was able to sketch something that i don't completely hate LOL#anyways.. many many thoughts and feelings poured into this one#i will say the primary thing that inspired it was killua & gon#and also yhk . They Looked Back#wish i could somehow concisely explain my thought process for the song's original meaning but its somewhat convoluted#i guess in essence it was motivated by the idea of ''what if orpheus really did somehow manage to Not look back?''#''isn't it more tragic that way? that he never looks back and just keeps walking?''#sniffles. yeah. shoutout to killua ''rip to orpheus but I'm Different'' zoldyck for that one#theres a lot of other different ways to interpret the song but that one's still one of my favorites...... lol#okay hugs and kisses and goodnight.... maybe one day i'll be able to make that video of mine. smiles#lalala#fishbowl
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separation
[id in alt by @/dgsdescribed]
#dgs#tgaa#the great ace attorney#ryuunosuke naruhodou#ryunosuke naruhodo#kazuma asogi#asoryuu#dgs spoilers#tgaa spoilers#tgaa2 spoilers#dgs2 spoilers#uh oh! I put myself in your hands and now I don't know how to get out!#I can't stop clinging to your ghost and now it's smothering me!!#anyways. whats with the dialogue where ryuu says he's worried kazuma will ''coldly tell me to wear [the mask] instead''#when it's already kazuma's armband and kazuma's sword and kazuma's dream. of course you'd be afraid to wear his face too#grabbing screencaps for ref for this really made me appreciate how stupidly big that trunk is#luckily I managed to finish this before tuesday... new ffxiv patch... walks into the sun
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Her favourite colour is yello w
#how do I explain the existence of Cyn to my friend she doesn't understand what she's for no matter how many times I say it please help#if you (the friend) are reading this. YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE. I AM CALLING YOU OUT ON PUBLIC TELEVISION!!! >:[#I'm gonna start rewatching season 9 of FOP tomorrow! WOWIE! Can't wait to finish the show and then move on to... *breathes heavily*#... fairly odder... And after that I get to rewatch a new wish! AGAIN! :D Yaaayyy!!!#sowwy if she looks kinda stupid I have to pay attention in class ya know economics wow I sure do love taxes (liar...)#cyn md#cyn#absolute solver#tagging her is a lil problematic to me... I'll just leave it to anyone who reblogs!!! m'kay!!!#murder drones#murder drones fanart#sometimes I wonder if I should give her a nose but I really like the smooth “snout” it's funny and *sigh* I just... don't know...#funfact when episode 7 released I drew her with the worst hair imaginable but what if some weird solver magic makes it kept in well#condition that would be funny make the rest lowkey rot and her hair is just silky soft#okie that's enough byeeeeeee
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Don't you hate it when a fic is REALLY good and is written REALLY well but one of the characters is extremely OOC. I keep getting whiplashed by it lmao
#I'm not gonna get into specifics of which fic it is in particular but.#This BNHA fic is really good but Uraraka would NOT say that#Tsuyu would NOT say that either#Shima speaks#It's so jarring bc everyone is so in character and then we pan to Ochako.....and it's like she's a completely different person.....#She is my BABY GIRL!! She is so sweet and kind and caring and wonderful and I can't believe they'd do her dirty like that#SHE WOULD NEVERRRRRR.#Fic is still good tho so I gotta finish it. God dammit.
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merry christmas y'all......so project eden's garden amirite
#i finished chapter 1 a couple days ago and OHHH BOY#i needed like. a few days to really process it. holy fuck#eva tsunaka my beloved#if this blog wasn't dedicated mostly to drdt i would absolutely rename it tsunakatime#not to say i put her above the loml teruko#but she's pretty much equal to her#teruko and eva. my wives#project eden's garden#project: eden's garden#p:eg#project eden's garden spoilers#p:eg spoilers#not really any spoilers here but i feel like i should add the tags anyways#just out of common courtesy#haha anyways someone please talk about p:eg with me i am NOT normal about this game AT ALL#“i can't believe eden killed all those people” - my brother#thats what i think about whenever i remember the title of this game
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2021
#identity v#idv#luchino diruse#WOW these are Old and yet??#I still really like these hehe#I never posted these here I think..?#I'm going through my old photos again and sigh#I don't draw like I used to... its so sad...#I'm pretty sure I could still do it like my hands remember its just I don't have the patience and motivation for it anymore#I get home and I have a billion other things to do and idk why but I'm just so lazy when I get home#nothing gets done ohh and certainly not drawing anymore... sad....#but yknow I'm still drawing so once I can get my motivation back and get my shit together#the wedding is back on-- sjebfjgkg#I miss drawing luchino#I miss drawing idv in general really HAJFKVKB I keep saying and missing but#I can't really seem to bring myself to actually do it anymore ohh.... somethings not right with me I think#but idk I can still work and I still go to school so at least it's not doomed#big sighs anyways hopefully!! I can finish my school project tomorrow and I will start to work on my cosplay proper#and then I can draw something along the way... tianlang jun won't animate himself either... he's stuck under a mountain ai.....
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Geo and Bonzle's relationship is something so nebulous and not entirely definable but so, so incredibly loving. Less father and daughter and more older brother and teen sister that he feels responsible for. She showed up when he was at his absolute lowest, barely keeping himself alive as day after day after day of agonizing loneliness went by. She knew that loneliness all too well and they found so much comfort in eachother. And even as their family grew their dynamic never really changed. I just. Hrghghhghghghgghgghgghhfjfjfhfjgjghggjjghgh 😭💕💕
#god I can't stop thinking about how Geo must've felt when Cole told him Bonzle was gone#he wasn't there for her. she “died” alone and scared and he was just waiting at home for her to come back#if he'd been there.. if he'd just been able to help.. god if he'd even just gotten to say goodbye#I really do not think Geo was in a good place mentally when he met Bonzle#I mean come on. abandoned and forgotten by the geckles and munce and alone in a junkyard wasteland? I'd lose my mind#augh they're so important to me#ninjago#dragons rising#ninjago geo#ninjago bonzle#geo finder#bonzle finder#I started writing this post in the middle of the night then I blacked out and finished writing it when I woke up
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Something that has been on my mind is what Kaz says to Nina at the end of Crooked Kingdom about Matthias's share of their money. He offers Nina that share, and then says, "I know it doesn't matter".
Kaz, who has spent this entire series insisting to the others that kruge means retribution, safety, success, comfort, and thus is the driving factor in his life, is sort of accidentally revealing how little he believes it. He knows Nina disapproves of his purported obsession with profit and is not motivated by money, and he also knows from personal experience that no matter how much he insists otherwise, having money will not fix what has happened to you. Maybe it will kind of buy you retribution or a degree of safety, but it will never bring back who you lost - it's too late for that. Kruge is a shitty consolation prize, and Kaz knows it. This is the only time he explicitly lets it on to the others - as emotionally constipated as he might act, he knows Nina's pain and knows that even suggesting that money would in any way fix it would be an insult.
#six of cringe posting? six of cringe KAZposting?#stranger things have happened#trust me those other fucks are in the brain microwave hardcore rn. kaz can get a turn in the meantime#guysss what if i am writing a six of crows outer wilds au. and what if i actually finish it someday. and you read it?? haha jk#unless.#anyway the brainrot is super strong rn and if i do actually follow thru this is gonna be like a 40k word single ch#back on topic. sometimes kaz tries to convince the reader that he believes this as well. and i hate to say it but some of yall get fooled#bro really does not give as much of a shit about kruge as ppl think. as much as he seems to gun for it to achieve these ends#he does not actually believe that it will bring him everything he wants. and it doesn't because it can't.#i like this quote bc he is kind of shocked into revealing his understanding toward nina. he knows how she feels and takes it into account#for once#kaz brekker#nina zenik#matthias helvar#six of crows#soc#tgt#soc meta
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@redscapeweek Day 3 - Diamonds!
Tall guys also need to sit on laps!
#a little haphazardly made cause i really wanted to finish this now so in the evening i can work on the day 4#Every time i sit to draw some chores come up man! Im trying over here!#Will try to make something for every day after that but can't say if its gonna be on time or not my life is a mess#but i had fun drawing this still!#Mumbo jumbo#goodtimeswithscar#redscape#mumscar#scarbo#redscapeweek23#court jester's art#mumbo is like a really large dog that got picked up#hes like ????#hermitshipping#forgot for a second there!
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if yord had lived he'd be leading the hunt for qimir and osha and we would've gotten the most delicious tension between him and qimir. qimir would start out frustrated that yord got away, intent on finishing what he started. and yord, once hunted, now hunter, once an exemplary jedi, and now solely focused on revenge disguised as righteous justice (which it is also a bit of that). and qimir starts to enjoy the game, the chase. and in this timeline, sol still dies, osha still goes with qimir, but yord was unconscious, recovering in a bacta tank, so all he knows when he wakes up is that qimir is out there and took osha, his friend, away. so then you also have the tension of that confrontation, the realization that osha has willingly turned, and that maybe yord can't blame her for that, because what has he been doing these past many months, years, maybe, but give in to the selfish desire to finish what he started too?
#in this au vernestra doesn't blame sol for all the deaths. like maybe she doesn't say it was her apprentice#but she says they're dealing w someone powerful#like she can't lie about that bc yord can testify#and in this maybe jecki lives. on one hand - probably not bc yord's guilt about her death would be SO GOOD#but on the other hand just maybe stick her in a coma for a while idk lol. until she joins him on the hunt#plus if she lives osha's betrayal will feel more personal...... hmm....#i literally do not have time to write another fic. i haven't even finished the ones i'm currently working on!!!#but now this is sticking in my brain.....#idk that post about yord's little gay earring just made me think that he should have gay tension with qimir. just a thought#like if we REALLY wanted to discuss the themes of light and dark and the in-between#and the whole 'nobody wakes up and thinks they're the bad guy' theme#maybe we should've left the very stoic uptight capital g Good Guy jedi alive to challenge that#yord fandar#qimir#osha aniseya#the acolyte#star wars#sticking this in the tag:#my writing#bc i very well might come back to this
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so like it’s 1999 and solid snake is in zanzibar land and gray fox tells you that all he can do is fight. it’s all he has and it’s probably all you’re ever going to have, too, because deep down you know your father is right, you know he is right as you click the lighter and burn the flesh off his skin, you know he is right when he tells you, this will never go away. i am always going to be a part of you. it’s 2005 and solid snake is in shadow moses island, alaska and gray fox tells you that’s good, snake. hit me harder. do it more. that’s good. when you meet meryl you kill the guards, and then snake thinks he loves her, so you kill psycho mantis for her, ocelot tortures you and you withstand it for her, you beat liquid to a pulp for her and while his blood is on your fists he smiles and tells you that you two, you’ll always be the same. gray fox means violence means meryl means violence, so what’s love if not that? what is it if not the feeling of broken bones under your knuckles, if not the smell of your father’s burnt flesh? but she's too young, she doesn’t understand you and she couldn’t if she tried, because she’s eighteen years old and doesn’t know any better and doesn’t understand that after you sleep with her you’re going to get up and let the pillow grow cold, she thinks you’ll tell her everything and when you don’t, because you can’t, she’ll leave you. you kill him with your fists and for her you destroy shadow moses and you hear him say to you again that’s good, snake, that feels good, do it harder. but it isn’t a coincidence that in mgs1 you meet otacon at the same time you meet gray fox. otacon who is so scared of battle he pisses his pants and otacon who cries over a woman who could never love him back and otacon who thinks good people like dogs, kind people like dogs, otacon who passed you a meal, ready-to-eat and a bottle of ketchup across the bars of your cell and when you ask him why the fuck are you here if you cant help me he says to you, i thought you might be hungry. otacon who gives you her handkerchief that was once her mother's and will be hers once again when she dies, when you rest it atop her glazed-over irises, a cycle of love. she was a good person, snake, and so are you. she liked the wolves and you do too. otacon who cries over his baby sister’s little body, who blames himself for being seventeen years old under the touch of the woman who should have been his mother. otacon who when it's 2014 will make you the solid eye and the octocamo suit and the mk. ii to keep you safe and say to you, don't hurt anyone, snake. will say to you: i'll follow you wherever you go, like this. otacon who blubbers like a baby and cries too much and who, when it's 2009 in new york city, you have to say to, go rescue the hostages, because if you don’t he’s going to crumple in on himself, a dying star. this is how you love, you don’t say to him, and how i love, because you showed me how. wrap your arms around his shoulders and hope it’s enough.
#do you guys get it do u understand what im trying to say.#i am so. taken by 'i thought you might be hungry' because#EVERY SINGLE person who is significant to snake is defined by conflict and violence#then enter otacon. civillian. camouflages himself out of fear. shows snake care through this action. can't do anything really#but he can make sure he eats.#otacon who can't open up about himself because he doesn't know what he's feeling. just like snake#the understanding and empathy in 'you don't have to explain'#snake who is seen as disposable by his mission overseers but not by otacon#'go rescue the hostages' grounds otacon. gives him something to do. keeps him from falling apart#'that's enough crying' after sniper wolf in mgs1 versus the hug in mgs2#words aren't going to fix things. but i can show you how much i care#AM I MAKING SENSE???????????????#they will never say i love you to each other but they can make sure the other feels it. all the time#theyre so you held me the whole way through but i couldn't say the words like you.....i swear guys...i swear..................#just finished mgs4 liquid sun this game i MIGHT have a meltdown when i finish the game but for now. soldiering on!#ok im done#mgs#otasune#myne#mywrites
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