it is all chaos and entropy. the thing is that the chaos and entropy make it beautiful and lovely.
yes, it's true that nature and the universe are uncaring and unspecific, and that is terrifying. i have lived through some of the unfairness - i got born like this, with my body caving into itself, with this ironic love of dance when i sometimes can't stand up for longer than 15 minutes. i am a poet with hands that are slowly shutting down - i can't hold a pen some days. recently i found a dead bird on our front porch. she had no visible injuries. she had just died, the way things die sometimes.
it is also true that nature and the universe are uncaring and unspecific, and that is wonderful. the sheer happenstance that makes rain turn into a rainbow. the impossible coincidence of finding your best friend. i have made so many mistakes and i have let myself down and i have harmed other people by accident. nature moves anyway. on the worst day of my life she delivers me an orange juice sunset, as if she is saying try again tomorrow.
how vast and unknowing the universe! how small we are! isn't that lovely. the universe has given us flowers and harp strings and the shape of clouds. how massive our lives are in comparison to a grasshopper. the world so bright, still undiscovered. even after 30 years of being on this earth, i learned about a new type of animal today: the dhole.
chance echoing in my life like a harmony between two people talking. do you think you and i, living in different worlds but connected through the internet - do you think we've ever seen the same butterfly? they migrate thousands of miles. it's possible, right?
how beautiful the ways we fill the vastness of space. i love that when large amounts of people are applauding in a room, they all start clapping at the same time. i love that the ocean reminds us of our mother's heartbeat. i love that out of all the colors, chlorophyll chose green. i love the coincidences. i love the places where science says i don't know, but it just happens.
"the universe doesn't care about you!" oh, i know. that's okay. i care about the universe. i will put my big stupid heart out into it and watch the universe feast on it. it is not painful. it is strange - the more love you pour into the unfeeling world, the more it feels the world loves you in return. i know it's confirmation bias. i think i'm okay if my proof of kindness is just my own body and my own spirit.
i buried the bird from our porch deep in the woods. that same day, an old friend reaches out to me and says i miss you. wherever you go, no matter how bad it gets - you try to do good.
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I think it'd be kinda interesting if Marx, after becoming part God-Clock, is unable to rest. After all, if a part of the Nova lives on in him, it'd surely be running to try do repairs or archive data, and this would mean Marx has developed long term insomnia. The reason this is bad is due to Marx being a Noddy, a group known entirely for sleeping. Imagine trying to get immense power, having a battle you lose in a way you can never truly understand, then lose the activity you love most as a part of you isn't really You anymore.
No wonder Marx went crazy.
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH (/POS)
>DESS.EXE HAS STOPPED FUNCTIONING
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okay so uhhh. definitely wasn't expecting this any time soon. or ever. but unless my tumblr has been lying to me for 3 days straight then i guess it happened.
uhhhhh. thanks for 700 followers bros 👁👁💧
like. i didn't even see my tumblr get to 400. unless i've been hallucinating that it's been at 300 for the last month. am i going insane? maybe. but uhhh. that's a lot of people looking at me. kinda freaking me out a little. but thanks regardless i guys, it does mean a lot to me ✨❤❤❤✨
anyways. i die. nervous. some various rambling under the cut and in the tags but here's an artistic rendition of how i feel right now. enjoy.
so yeah. i don't know how the hell my follower count has doubled in like, two months. maybe it's the Fake Peppino Hugs? a lot of people have been wanting hugs after all. it uhhhh kinda makes me feel weird knowing there's this many of you. but i'll try to manage.
speaking of hugs, yes i've seen the new asks and requests in my inbox i promise!! i will get to them when i can, but for now i'm gonna try to focus on getting a couple other big important things done. mainly, a large Fake Peppino headcanon-related post i've been planning, and getting a few more characters up on Artfight before July.
and also.... i might be getting commissions up soon too?? i don't know how soon, but it'd be a way for me to get income right now since i don't have a job. or, if you don't wanna commission me but still wanna show support, i have a link to me Ko-Fi on my intro post as well! really any support is welcome, but i'm trying to figure out how to do commissions and pricing and stuff since it'll be the first time i *officially* do them. i hope you'll think about it though!!
but yeah, i've got a good few things i've gotta get done with, i'm trying to take things a liiiiittle slow right now though so i don't burn myself out fully. i will try to get stuff done soon though! expect that big Fakey post in maybe a week or so, and i'll update you all on other things that happen as well!
thanks for reading if you have, love ya's ❤❤💗💗💗❤❤
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next month me and my grandma are going to visit my godfather who lives in Spain, but instead of being excited (it's gonna be my second time abroad in my life) I'm anxious af, because even though I'm an adult I live with my parents and I need to tell my father about it. normal parents would - y'know - be happy that their children have opportunity to visit another country, but instead he's gonna be insufferable about it, because it's my mom's side of family and he despises my uncle. but what is he gonna do? kick me out of the house even though he promised that as long as I'm studying or working I don't need to worry about such thing, humiliate me as usual, tell me that I'm childish and spoiled or make my mom's life a living hell again? I'm aware of the fact that the longer I'm putting it off the worse his reaction is gonna be, but I'm just not mentally able to tell him that, because I don't know how he will react. I don't need any money from him, I don't have to use my phone during this trip (I dunno how the roaming and stuff work), I just want to be sure he's gonna behave like a proper human being towards my mom and my siblings when I won't be at home and not act like a total asshole while talking with me about it.
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found out there's a pnach cheat you can use to mute nova's calls in xillia 2 (she gets REALLY insistent if your current gald is over the quantity of the next payment) and now i'm imagining nova calling him and ludger just stares at the ghs in silence and blocks her number
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Always good to see you too :D
Did you know that while developing the film Prince of Egypt Dreamworks would punish animators by sending them to work on Shrek instead?
Inscryption is Gamefuna's Shrek
-🥊
I did know about that! Though with Inscryption being both a cover-up and a fairly isolated project, I'd imagine it would be more of an office rumor rather than an actual NPC designation. Like "You'd better do your job properly; I hear there's a position open in Inscryption" or "Wow, that looks like shit; did you pull it out of Inscyption's asset folder?". On account of the liability, it's more or less just an office in-joke; people don't actually get reassigned there...
...Most of the time.
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steel playlist perhaps ??!
'Where innocence is burned, in flames / A million miles from home, I'm walking ahead / I'm frozen to the bones, I am / A soldier on my own, I don't know the way' Steel's perspective of that night in Silbry and the fighting that followed, losing her True Friends and going back alone to pick up Suvi....
'Don't talk politics and don't throw stones / Your royal highnesses' a song for the Citadel, the tension of always looking behind your back, always being watched and considered.. looking after your little royal highness
'Easily comes the glamour / Intimidating, radiate power (..) Comrades link arms, we go to bars' another Citadel song, this time focusing on the glamour and decadence of everyone's favourite tower of wizard hubris
'What are you made of? / What do you dress it up in? / Who do you service? / Where does the power rest?' internal monologue for our tactical general, our sword of the Citadel
'And if you complain once more / You'll meet an army of me' poor Suvi having a terrifying army general as a surrogate mother can't be easy.. also the vocals here remind me of the editing Taylor did on Steel's voice to make her serve lethal levels of cunt. people died.
'Never any call for a lone wolf / You have to learn to go with the flow' echoing Steel's conversion with Suvi, as Brennan said- the empire loves a soldier, but hates an adventurer. also 'Your bones don't rust / They stay hard as diamonds / They cut through steel'
✨ send me a WBN character and I'll make a short annotated playlist for them ✨
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