#I can afford to relax a little bit until the weekend

[reginrokkr]

To no one's surprise, I have exams for the next three weeks. The queue will continue to work (there is enough until June lol) and I might not be able to fill in the daily quota I was determined to write of at least a reply, but I also don't want to let the writing zone fade as I let happen in the past. Since there won't be always drafts to tackle, I'll be reblogging memes (maybe I'll put one per day in the queue as I have a great library of those in my archive blog) so I can write things no matter how short or long they come out!

[chukys-mouthguard]

rubberband

featuring -> luke hughes x female reader

word count -> 2.8k

genre -> fluff/angst

summary -> luke comes back to umich, but he can’t avoid seeing you

note -> italics are flashbacks

The start of another school year meant another fall semester filled with football, house parties, and memories. You and your friends had just finished moving in the day before, Saturday being blocked off on your calendar as the day of welcome back parties all over campus. Typically you would have one house in mind to go to, but since he’d left Michigan, you weren’t a fan. Not that the other guys that were still around weren’t great, but the memories that remained after Luke had moved on to New Jersey were still so fresh for you. Though it was your Senior year, and you were trying your best to make it a great one.

You and your friends headed down the sidewalk, closing in on the hockey house and you could feel your palms growing sweaty. The house still looked just as it did the first night you’d shown up there Freshman year, not a clue of who you would meet that night.

-

“Can I get you anything?”

Looking up, your eyes met those of the curly haired Freshman you’d heard was named Luke. He smiled softly down at you, noticing how shy you’d become looking over the large amount of alcohol they had covering their kitchen counter. Your freehand scratching at the skin of your wrist, a nervous habit Luke surely noticed but found cute, smiling down at you as you nodded.

“Um, sure.”

“We’ve got beer, vodka, tequila. Though I would not recommend that unless you’re actually trying to die tonight.”

You laughed at his joking as he gave you the grand tour of the bottom shelf alcohol that the boys could afford. Though no one minding as they more so cared about being drunk than what the liquids tasted like.

“What are you drinking?”

Luke looked at his solo cup, making a face before returning eye contact.

“Beer, but if I’m honest I wouldn’t recommend this either. It’s awful to be blunt.”

The two of you laughed together, your eyes scouring the options once again as the only logical choice remained, vodka. Luke poured you some into a cup, letting you decide on what you’d opt to mix into the alcohol. Though he mentioned he wouldn’t judge if you drank it straight, but surely it would taste worse that way.

“I’m Luke.”

“Y/n.”

“Well y/n, can I give you the tour?”

-

Little did you know it, but at the time Luke was using the excuse of a tour as a way to get away from the party. He wasn’t the biggest party animal his Freshman year, enjoying the opportunity to sneak away with you for a bit and relax. His favorite spot was to sneak up onto the roof, not many people knew how and it was often quiet up there.

But it was clear that had changed as the roof was currently crowded with tens of people seated around, some chugging beers and tossing them to the ground below. Others shouting at the crowd below over the music that was blasting from the house.

-

“So Luke Hughes, how long until people discover our secret spot?”

The two of you had been keeping up the routine of sneaking to the roof for several weekends now. No one ever seemed to notice, and even if they did they made their own assumptions of what the two of you were doing.

“Hmm, well, I would hope they never do. I’d love for this to stay our spot. But, I would say maybe two more weekends and we will get kicked out.”

He sipped his beer as the two of you watched the party taking place below. Always loving to watch his teammates try their luck with different girls; some succeeding, others striking out.

“Can I ask you something?”

You looked to Luke, his smile fading as he looked more sincere, nodding his head as his way of asking you to continue.

“Do you, are we…sorry, I just. I don’t want to read too much into anything, but, what would you say this is? Like with us?”

Luke sighed softly, sipping his beer as he tried to find the right response. Making you nervously scratch at your wrist as you were immediately regretting even asking the question. Surely he didn’t see this as anything, he was focused on hockey not relationships.

“I think this is, comfortable? It feels right? I don’t know, I just really like you being here with me. I can’t describe it, but it feels natural. What do you think?

He nervously sipped his beer while you now tapped the side of your seltzer, nodding slightly in agreement as you were thinking of your own response.

“I agree. It feels right, whatever it is. I just enjoy the time I get with you, always. And, I’m happy here.”

“Me too.”

Luke’s smile faded as he slowly moved closer to you, his hand tucking some of your hair behind your ear before resting on your cheek. You could feel his breath against your lips he was so close to you. Your eyes darted from his lips to his eyes as time felt like it was frozen before he’d finally kissed you. The two of you tangling your hands into each other's hair, the taste of alcohol mixed with your chapstick. Neither one of you fighting for dominance, simply letting the moment happen how it may.

Luke finally pulled away, a blush on his cheeks as he scratched his head. Slightly embarrassed at his forwardness, but appreciating that you didn’t seem to turn down his actions.

“Still feels right?”

“Mhm, definitely.”

Luke smiled as he looked down, messing with the bracelets on his wrist, pulling a simple rubberband type off and grabbing for your hand.

“Here.”

He placed the bracelet on your wrist with a smile, admiring how it looked despite its simple nature.

“Whenever you’re feeling nervous, when you’re missing me, or whatever the case may be. I’ll be there.”

You smiled at the rubberband, lightly snapping it against your skin. Realizing that not only was it a reminder of Luke, but something to help your nervous habit he’d obviously picked up on. Appreciating the gesture and that he’d noticed the small quirk about you.

-

That bracelet was your source of comfort during numerous finals weeks, a stress reliever during all of Luke’s home games as you’d snap it against your skin. And even with Luke leaving for New Jersey, the bracelet remained as a symbol of his promise to always come back.

Things between you and Luke had continued similarly to how they’d started your Freshman year. Though never putting a label on things, it was common knowledge that you were certainly more than nothing, you were something.

You watched the group of girls from across the way, crowding around in hopes to get to see the guys after their big win. It was a normal occurrence, especially with girls from opposing schools. And while you and Luke were definitely secure in your relationship, you still couldn’t help but feel a bit jealous.

Watching how the girls all flocked to him, asking for pictures, trying to create small talk. Luke of course too nice to ignore them, simply smiling through it all.

Looking up, his eyes met yours, his smile growing wide as he excused himself from the group of girls. Immediately wrapping his arms around your waist as he picked you up, stealing a kiss before setting you back down.

“You’ve got some groupies huh?”

Luke rolled his eyes with a short, placing an arm around your shoulder as you two started off towards the exit.

“Only one groupie I have eyes for babe.”

-

Things were great with Luke, that was until he’d gotten drafted by the Devils. You knew the day was likely to come at some point, but you never thought about what it would be like when it finally did.

The conversation hadn’t really taken place regarding what would happen for the two of you if and when he made the move to New Jersey. But once things were official, and he was leaving, you were faced with the inevitable.

-

“So, you weren’t gonna tell me until the day you were leaving?”

You looked to Luke through tear filled eyes. While you wanted to be happy and excited for him, having just signed his entry level contract with the Devils. You were heartbroken that in the same day he’d achieved his dreams, he was also telling you goodbye.

“I know, it’s the worst possible way to tell you. But, believe me, this is all happening so fast there was no right time for any of this. I hate having to just up and leave you. I won't be that far, you can come visit me, we will see each other in the summer. This doesn’t change anything.”

Luke looked down to see you nervously pulling at the rubberband that was on your wrist. Smiling softly as he knew you hadn’t once taken it off since he’d given it to you over a year ago.

Taking your hands in his he tried his best to relax your mind that he could see was racing with a million and one thoughts.

“Look at me, I promise, this doesn’t change things okay?”

You wanted to believe him, that him only being a few states away wouldn’t change anything. That you’d continue with your relationship exactly how it had been. That you could snap the rubberband on your wrist whenever you were sad, anxious, or missing him, and it would all magically get better. But you couldn’t help but be nervous about what this next step meant for him. Leaving you behind at school, while you knew it was bound to happen, didn’t feel any less shitty than all the times you’d tried to prepare yourself for it.

“You promise?”

Luke cupped your face as he brought your lips to his, the kiss nothing more than a longing peck, but enough to make your racing thoughts cease for even a moment.

“I promise”

-

But his promises fell short, and those summer’s at the lake house never happened. One trip to New Jersey was all you’d gotten, and soon enough Luke had become mostly a memory.

Text messages and calls were here and there, his schedule keeping him busier than he ever was at Michigan. You’d tried your best to hold out hope, telling yourself that he’d made a promise to you. But as more time went on, you’d begun to realize that maybe all this relationship was with Luke, was nothing more than a casual thing. That despite how much he cared about you, and all the promises he’d made, he wasn’t looking for something serious. That he wasn’t serious about you.

Making your way up the stairs of the hockey house, you’d noticed several familiar faces along with several new ones. The freshman players were easier to spot, as they reminded you of Luke on the night you’d first met him. Timid compared to the veteran guys who were screaming about games of pong and beer die that were set to start in the backyard.

You felt yourself growing a bit anxious, wondering why you’d come back to a house that held so many memories. While they were mostly good, they made you think of Luke.

Heading out to the backyard, you found comfort in the sea of people. Knowing that you’d easily be able to get lost among them, distract yourself from the familiar faces while you hoped the alcohol you planned to consume would ease your nerves.

Following behind your friend, you found yourself subconsciously snapping the band at your wrist, trying to distract yourself from any Luke related thoughts that crept into your mind.

Taking a solo cup from her hand, your friend began talking about the way the girls at the party seemed to flock to all the hockey guys as they stood on the back porch. The two of you laughed, knowing you once were like them. Drooling over the shirtless boys at the house, thinking they were the hottest thing on campus. Wanting to be able to say you’d gotten the chance to talk to one of the hockey boys at the party.

“Oh my god, y/n, please don’t look at the porch.”

Your friend reached for your arm, turning you to face her so your back was to the group of men on the porch. Naturally you looked over your shoulder as you were curious what she didn’t want you to see. But the moment you saw him, you felt your heart sink.

“Y/n, I’m sorry. We can leave.”

Obviously, Luke had every right to be there. He did go to Michigan and played hockey for the school. But you weren’t expecting to see him back since he’d moved on to the NHL. Especially not expecting to see him shirtless at the hockey house looking more amazing than ever. Girls crowded around him, all hoping to get even just a touch of his hand on their skin to be able to brag about for the next month.

Before you could make a decision about leaving, Luke’s attention had turned in your direction. Slightly lowering his sunglasses from his eyes, they met yours as he stood shocked to have seen you.

You could feel the goosebumps beginning to cover your skin, your heart racing as Luke began to make his way over to you. Instinctually, you headed through the crowd, wanting to be anywhere but this house. Luke set down his beer as he took off after you.

“Y/n, come on. Please y/n!”

His hand grabbed your arm as he caught up to you, stopping you in your tracks as you turned to face him.

“What?”

Your tone was harsh as you tried hiding the pain in your voice, but the tears in your eyes of course gave it away. Luke’s heart sinking seeing you hurt, never expecting this moment to happen, otherwise he might have prepared better. But for the moment, he was at a loss for words.

“I, I’m sorry. For everything. I know that’s not specific, but I’m honestly just shocked to see you.”

You laughed as you wiped your tears that were threatening to fall. Shaking your head you searched for the right words, trying not to start a fight in the alley next to the hockey house. People occasionally walking by, a scene not something that was needed, especially for Luke.

“You’re shocked to see me, on the campus of the college I go to? Interesting…”

“Oh come, don’t be like that y/n please! Look, I get it. I fucked up, in so many ways. The summers at the lake house, you coming to New Jersey, all of it. I broke my promises to you, and I wish I could go back and change it all.”

Luke’s eyes fell to the band on your wrist, watching as you snapped it against your skin. Hating that he was making you nervous or anxious, wishing that things could go back to normal for the two of you. But he knew he’d ruined that.

“Look I get it, if you didn’t want something serious. If I was just a casual fling or something. Then fine. But why waste my time? Why make me think you liked me?”

Luke grabbed your wrist, stopping you from snapping the band any longer.

“Y/n, none of that is true. It wasn’t that I thought you were a casual fling. I just, I couldn’t be the person you needed. With signing with the Devils and leaving here, leaving you. I just couldn't keep my promises. And it was wrong, to make you think I could. To keep you holding on if this wasn’t going to happen for us. And I’m so sorry to do that to you.”

You looked up at him, seeing the pain in his eyes, believing his words as you pulled the band from your wrist. Setting it in his hand as you nodded your head with a sigh.

“I appreciate the apology, but it doesn’t change anything that happened. It doesn’t change how I feel, how hurt I am by all of it. So, you can take that bracelet back. I can’t keep it anymore and think about you every time I see it. That was a promise, that I could think of you and find comfort anytime I snapped it or saw it. But, I think that I need to move on. Because it’s just another broken promise at this point.”

Luke bit his tongue, knowing that despite what he wishes he could say, you don’t want to hear it. Holding the bracelet tight in his hand, he watched as you pushed past him. Heading back to the party, leaving him with only the bracelet as a memory. Slipping it on to his own wrist, immediately snapping it a few times to calm his emotions before returning to join the guys on the back porch.

[mxstellatayte]

fuck me up, florida.

warnings: angst for the majority of it, sex at the end though, legal use of alcohol (reader and logan are both 23,) mentions of gunshot wounds, minor character death, based on a taylor swift song, childhood (middle/high school) friends to lovers, idiots in love, "you came" "you called," reader is half mexican (mom's side), slightly inaccurate bc i know carola wasn't at the miami gp but just go with it for the plot, reader's last name is rodriguez,

author's note: y'all i apologize if any of the spanish grammar is a little weird. my spanish is rusty, pls don't hate me for it

logan sargeant x female reader

i need to forget so

tuesday, april 30th.

you scan your ticket, the screen displaying your name and seat number. 12A. at least it'll be easy to sleep, you think.

after shoving your suitcase above your seat, you shuffle your way to the window and buckle yourself in.

are you really doing this? flying a couple thousand miles to visit your childhood best friend who, up until recently, had you convinced that his newfound fame that he'd gathered by announcing his enrollment in the williams driver's academy made him too good for you.

the only thing that made you think otherwise was the instagram dm he'd sent you five weeks prior, asking if you'd be able to make it to the miami grand prix. instead of a simple yes or no, you responded with the heaviest three words you've ever seen in order.

can we call?

logan picked up on the second ring.

"hey."

"hey."

"how's texas?"

you smile. "hot. sunny. flat. beachless."

"so... it's good?" you hate that you can still picture his facial expressions even after not seeing him for years except for on tv.

"'s okay, but it's not home, y'know?"

"definitely. it doesn't matter how much i decorate my place in england, it's never florida."

"nothing besides florida is ever florida," you sigh, looking out the window of your apartment. "how's the season been?" you don't exactly know why you're asking. you know exactly how his season's gone. you keep every single detail of every single race weekend meticulously catalogued in a journal that you take everywhere with you. no matter what, you've stayed up late or woken up early to watch every race, as if your hopeful energy would make its way across the world to him in time.

"honestly? it's been pretty shit. the car handles really badly and wasn't really even ready for the first few hours of testing in bahrain. i can't get it to perform and maybe that's just because i haven't linked with the car yet, but it still really sucks."

you sigh, hoping logan can't tell how disappointed you are with his team and engineers. "you need a better team, lo."

"i know." there's silence between you for a few moments, and every second that passes makes it grow heavier on your chest. "will you come to miami?"

there it is. the reason you called him.

"i don't know, lo. don't get me wrong, i'd love to, but it's really short notice and i don't know if i could afford the trip. i might be able to make it to austin, but i'll need the time to save the money for the trip."

"i'll fly you out," logan immediately says, his tone almost desperate. longing. "i'll pay for your flight, your hotel, everything. please?"

that last word hit you like a punch in the gut. you only had one more reason to not go and you weren't about to tell him that reason. it was a shitty excuse anyways.

you're not about to tell him that the reason you moved to texas was to give him the space he needed to be able to succeed in his career and for you to succeed in yours.

take me to florida

you're jolted awake by the force of the plane landing, if you can call the awkward limbo you were stuck in sleep. immediately, your stomach twists with anxiety. logan had offered to pick you up from the airport, but you refused.

"i'll just take an uber," you'd said. "i'm gonna want to relax a bit after the flight, y'know?"

his only trade-off? you met him for dinner. simple enough, right?

in theory.

now, standing in front of the full-length mirror in your hotel room, you debate between a floral sundress and a pair of denim shorts, a tank top, and a white button-up t-shirt with a colorful inkblot pattern.

you decide on the sundress.

fifteen minutes later, you're pushing earrings through your piercings, silver abstract shapes you'd bought on a trip to europe with your mother. you have to leave, but the situation you're in sucks. your hair won't sit right on your head, either being too frizzy from the humidity or losing any and all volume, and your makeup just doesn't seem like it'll last in the miami heat.

fuck it.

who are you dressing for, anyways?

logan's seen you at your absolute worst. he was the only one you let yourself cry in front of after your father died. he was the one that held you for what seemed like hours while you sobbed into his chest and he told you that none of it was your fault- that you never could have known that, when you hugged him before he left for the police station, told him you loved him, and slipped a note into his lunch box, the next time you would see him, he would be laying in a casket. he was the only one that could make you smile in the weeks following his funeral, dropping his entire schedule if you simply sent him a text that said "can you come over?"

the restaurant logan found isn't too far from your hotel, so you ultimately decide to walk. your walk is over before you're able to process that it even started and you're taking out your earbuds and putting them in your bag, taking out your phone instead to text logan.

i'm here.

i've got some regrets

were you always this breathtakingly beautiful?

logan's phone buzzes in his front pocket, but he knows it's you texting him. he doesn't even bother taking it out of his pocket before standing up from his seat at the bar and walking over to you, and when you see him, your smile almost makes his heart melt.

"hey," he says, and he hopes his voice doesn't waver from how nervous he is.

"hey. i missed you," you respond, dodging the hand he holds out and going in for a hug. "i've known you since middle school, logan, i'm not shaking your hand."

your arms around him and your body pressed against his almost makes logan short circuit. thankfully, he's able to regain control of his brain and hug you back, hopefully before you realize he isn't hugging you back.

when you pull back, the hug seeming way too brief for logan's preference, you're looking up and smiling with a sparkle in your eyes that makes him regret not making enough time for you. "thanks for bringing me out here."

"thanks for coming. do you want a drink?"

"sure. do you have a table yet?"

"i was waiting for you."

"in that case, lead the way." you gesture towards the restaurant, and logan shows you to a booth in the corner. soon enough, a waiter comes over to you and sets down two glasses of water and two menus.

"welcome in, y'all. do we need a bit of time to look at the menu or do we know what we want to get started?" his southern drawl is thick, and it reminds you of texas. but you're in florida now.

"i think we'll look at the menu for a minute, thanks," logan says, and the waiter nods and walks away. as you open the menu and begin looking, logan points out something you might like and you do the same for him. conversation begins to flow freely between you, and it reminds you of the times in high school when you would go out with friends.

eventually, you decide on a plate of nachos and logan gets a plate of wings. as you wait for your food, you catch up on everything: your move to texas, logan's racing career, your work volunteering with the austin philharmonic, his homesickness from living in england, and everything in between. you crack stupid jokes, share bites of food, and steal sips of each other's drinks.

it's like old times.

i'll bury them in florida

on wednesday, you and logan drive up to visit your father's headstone. it's difficult. it's only the third time you've visited him since he was buried three years ago. the first time you visited him was a year after he died. even a year later, you still carried so much anger and hatred towards the doctors and nurses that were operating on him, trying desperately to save his life after two bullets hit him- one in his leg, one in his torso.

he died on the table.

the second time was just a few months after, and you were still wearing your cap, gown, and stole from your graduation ceremony. by then, you had been able to forgive the doctors and had graduated in the top 10% of your class. four years of hell had finally rewarded you with a degree in instrumental performance and an internship at the south florida symphony orchestra.

now, the third time, you have a picnic blanket and lunch packed into the backseat of logan's car, the windows are rolled down, and your favorite playlist is shuffled on the aux. it's a beautiful day, too; it isn't too hot (even with the humidity,) there's a gentle breeze in the air, and clouds occasionally cover the sun. when logan pulls into the parking lot of the cemetery and you sling your tote bag full of food over your shoulder, your hands start shaking.

of course, logan notices.

his hand slides into your own, and you look up at him. his eyes meet yours and you smile. "thank you for coming with me," you say.

"of course. i didn't want you to have to do this alone."

you look back at the gate into the cemetery, the black bars menacingly sleek and very, very terrifying. you chew your lower lip in anxiety. "i don't know if i can do it, logan."

"i'm here with you. i know you. you're strong. you aren't the kind of person to let a gate scare you." you laugh lightly, looking down at the ground. the gravel of the parking lot, your scuffed, beat-up high top purple converse, and logan's nike dunks make up what you have to describe as a perfect picture. your phone is in your free hand before you know it, and you're lining up the shot. "still into photography, huh?"

"yep. i have some cameras in my suitcase at the hotel." when you pocket your phone and look back up at him, logan's heart melts. the shine in your eyes and the passion in your smile is enough to soften anyone's heart, but for him, as someone who's known you for years and has been there for you through thick and thin, it touches him in such a special way. "i'm hoping to get some good photos of the races. but enough delaying. let's go visit my dad."

the creak of the gates opening makes your ears bleed, and you laugh at how logan is making the exact same face as you in reaction to such a shrill sound. despite only having visited his headstone twice before, you remember exactly where in the cemetery it is and are able to find it within five minutes.

"hi, dad," you begin, your voice already wavering just the slightest and tears beginning to well in your eyes. logan's hand squeezes yours, though, and you're reminded that he's right there. he always will be. you take a deep breath and continue. "i miss you. we all do. i know i haven't visited you in a while, and i'm sorry about that. i really do have to come stop by every now and then. i moved to austin and have a volunteering gig with the austin philharmonic at almost every show and i have a job at a company that helps students with learning disabilities learn instruments. it's really fun." you pause to wipe the tears off of your cheeks, your nose beginning to drip. "sam is in his junior year of college, and he's majoring in engineering. he flew the coop, but he still comes home for the summers. he, uh, he actually got in to c.u. boulder, like he always talked about. that kid was always thinking about college, even in middle school.

"i'm actually here with logan, too, if you hadn't noticed. do you, uh, do you want to fill him in on what's going on with you, or should i keep going?"

"whatever you prefer."

"okay, i'm going to keep talking, because i think if i don't, i'm going to completely break down. logan finally signed with williams to drive on their formula 1 team last year, like i always said he would. i'm really proud of him and really regret not telling him that more, and now that i'm saying it out loud i'm promising both you and him that i'll tell him that more often. the race this weekend is actually here, in florida. miami, specifically. it's always a celebrity shit show that no one really wants to see, but it's the main opportunity for the celebrity sponsors to actually go to a race.

"what else has been going on? oh, mom is still a therapist. i can't tell you much about that because of hipaa, but she always comes home saying that she's glad that she could help someone. i'm gonna have dinner with her tomorrow night, and then i'm going back into miami to watch logan's practice sessions."

you pause your rambling, thinking about what there is to say next, but your thought is interrupted by your stomach grumbling. loud. you and logan laugh just as loudly, the sound echoing through the grass field and stone gravesites. "oh, yeah, that's another thing. we brought lunch. i also got you pink tulips, because i know they're your favorite." you delicately rest the bouquet on your father's headstone as you sit down, then pull out the different plastic containers filled with food you'd stolen from the williams hospitality. "you'd be proud of me, dad. i smuggled this entire picnic out of the wiliams motorhome without a hiccup. robin hood style."

logan laughs, and you turn to him. he's mirrored your position, sitting cross-legged on the grass. "apple?"

"nah, i'm gonna start with my sandwich. i did grab you some of the salt and vinegar chips i know you like."

the look logan gives you can only be described as pure adoration. "you," he says, pointing a finger at you in an incredibly sassy manner, "are an absolute goddess."

"i know," you respond cheekily, tossing some hair over your shoulder.

the banter between the two of you continues through your picnic, laughter and smiles erasing the dried tracks of tears on your cheeks and on logan's. you're almost able to forget where you are.

tell me i'm despicable

almost two hours later, the two of you are laying in a nearby park underneath a tree, peacefully observing the clouds that pass overhead and talking even more about any topic that comes to your mind. the question that's been gnawing at you since your plane landed in miami eventually bubbles to the surface, and it tumbles past your lips before you can stop it.

"did you ever wonder why i moved to texas?" you look to your left where logan rests, but he keeps looking up at the sky. you mirror him.

"i always assumed it was just because you needed a change of scenery. after everything that happened and your music career taking off, it would make sense that you would relocate to somewhere better suited for you."

"that's the thing, though. if i'm being entirely honest with you, lo, i hate texas. i hate the whole state. i hate how hot it is all the time without even being humid, i hate not being able to go to the beach. i hate how dry it is. i hate how flat it is. i hate the monotony of it. i hate not being here."

logan hesitates for a moment before speaking, and it's the longest moment you've ever experienced. "why did you move to austin, then?"

when he looks over at you, you're chewing your lower lip. it's a nervous tic, logan's noticed. he's not even sure if you know you do it. "honestly? i thought you moved on from our friendship. i thought everything with f1 suddenly got so big and important and famous that maybe i wasn't... enough? i thought that being a police officer's daughter from the same town as you that was studying to teach people how to understand and play music maybe just wasn't cool enough to be friends with a world-renowned formula 1 driver."

logan's heart almost shatters when he hears the weakness in your voice. you sound so broken and so alone. he knew that, when you lost your father, you isolated yourself from a lot of people, even your best friend from high school and through your first year of college. he was the only person outside of your immediate family that you spent a decent amount of time with, but when he was admitted to the driver's academy he had to move to england. he abandoned you.

"i didn't. i never forgot about you. sometimes i still look through the photos we have together because i miss you that much."

you sit up, tears pricking your eyes for the second time that day. "really?"

"yeah. maybe once a week?"

when you look down at logan, you're suddenly starstruck. you can't help but notice all of his little features that you wouldn't see if you didn't know to look for them. his freckles that are so light you'd have to squint to see them if you didn't know them like the back of your hand. the mole on his chin that he'd always been self-conscious about but you've always seen it as beautiful. the lines from where his eyes crinkle when he smiles. the annoyingly perfect flop of his hair that he's styled almost the exact same way since you started high school together. an urge you haven't felt in years suddenly bubbles, white-hot in the pit of your stomach, and it's boiling over before you can stop it. your eyes are closed and your lips are on his. finally. after years of wanting, of stares that lasted just a bit too long to be just friendly, of flushed faces and nervous excuses, you're finally kissing him.

but he's not kissing you back.

you pull back immediately, panicked that you read something wrong. you turn away, hiding your face in your hands out of shame. "shit, logan, i'm so sorry. i thought-"

"kiss me again." logan sits up, and when you turn around, the look he's giving you can only be described as completely and entirely fucked. you don't question his statement, just lean forward, placing your lips on his, and letting yourself melt. he moans softly into the kiss, his right arm wrapping around your waist and pulling you impossibly closer. when you pull away and open your eyes, your breath catches in your throat. he looks beautiful. his eyes remain closed, but when they flutter open, you see colors in them that you've never seen before. sure, you've always seen the darker rim of blue that outlines his irises, but now that you're so close to him, you can see the flecks of green and grey in them. it's the most stunning thing you've ever seen.

eventually, you break the silence between the two of you. "i've wanted to kiss you for so long," you whisper, so quiet you're not sure logan heard it.

but he did.

"me, too," he says, and after a beat of silence between you two, you both burst out laughing. the laugh he hears from you is the pure, bright laugh that logan's missed so dearly, the laugh that you only really let him hear. the laugh that has tears in your eyes and makes you snort because you're laughing so hard you can't even breathe properly.

eventually, when you're able to calm down, your head resting on logan's shoulder, your hand holding his, you're able to process what just happened. you just hope logan is processing it, too.

"we just kissed."

"yes. we did."

"how long have you held out on me?"

"since christmas of sophomore year. when you made me the chevron bracelet with my favorite colors."

you laugh, then lift your head to look at him. "i fell for you in october of that year. when you convinced your mom to drive two and a half hours for the marching band state finals. just so you could be there with me."

"god, we're idiots," logan laughs. you can't help but lean forward and press another kiss to his lips, lingering there and just breathing him in.

existing.

say it's unforgivable

the next two days fly by. thursday, you spend the day with your mother. she asks all sorts of questions as if she doesn't know the answers, and you answer each one with a smile on your face. when she asks about logan, you smile sheepishly. she figures out what the smile means.

"took you two long enough."

normally you'd still be in bed at 9:30 am on a friday, but today, you walk into the miami paddock clutching logan's hand for dear life. your neon green pass hangs from your neck, a white williams cap atop your head. you can't help but feel out of place, but someone calls logan's name and you both turn. your stomach drops when you see who's called his name. his hair is styled similarly to logan's, and he sports a papaya polo.

you'd know him anywhere. it's oscar piastri.

you're standing there a bit awkwardly as logan greets his friend, but your heart stops when oscar turns to you. "oscar, this is my girlfriend." he introduces you by your name to the mclaren driver and you wipe your hands on your denim shorts before shaking his hand firmly, exchanging "nice to meet you"s. the three of you chat for a few minutes before oscar is summoned by his pr manager.

"girlfriend, huh?" you look up at logan with a smile on your face, lacing his fingers with yours.

"i didn't mean to overstep, but i kind of assumed that's what this is now. is it?" he looks a bit nervous asking that, and if you thought your love for him couldn't grow any more, you thought wrong.

"that's absolutely what we are, lo. you're my boyfriend. i'm your girlfriend." you can tell just how hard logan's trying to not let the smile on his face show just how happy he is to hear you say that, and you stand on your tiptoes to press a kiss to his lips briefly. "you have a prep meeting to get to, don't you?"

"i do. come with me, though. i need to introduce you to alex and lily. she can show you around."

"sounds like a plan. i need to learn how to do all of..." you gesture around you, the white tents and media carts all seeming suddenly too intimidating. "...this."

logan laughs, placing a hand on the small of your back to guide you towards the williams hospitality. when you're next to him, though, despite the cameras around you and your proximity to some of the world's biggest stars, you feel safe and protected.

after meeting logan's teammate and the thai driver's girlfriend, who you quickly realize is one of the sweetest people you've ever had the pleasure of meeting, you're shown around the williams hospitality and, eventually, the paddock. lily introduces you to the other drivers' wives and girlfriends that have made it to the weekend, and when you hear a certain last name, your ears perk up.

"martinez? is she latina?"

"yeah," kika, pierre's girlfriend, says. "she's checo's wife. i'm pretty sure she's in the red bull hospitality right now, though."

"ah, speak of the devil," lily says. you see carola walking up to the five of you, alexandra ("please, honey, call me alex," she'd said, bringing you in for a kiss on your cheek,) having walked away to get a drink and escape into the sweet air conditioning. "carola, there's a new couple on the paddock."

"you're kidding," the latina answers, her accent apparent. "who?"

"logan found himself a girlfriend. allow me to introduce her." lily turns to you and introduces you by your full name, last name and all. it seems that carola has a similar reaction to your last name as you did to hers, and her head tilts to the side.

"ya no eres la única mexicana aquí," you say, and her eyebrows raise. (you aren't the only mexican here anymore.)

"hablas español, también?" (you speak spanish, too?) when you nod, her smile brightens. "hay, chica, creo que nosotras dos nos vamos a llevar muy bien." (oh, girl, i think we're going to get along very well.)

on saturday, you find yourself back in the williams motorhome, except this time, you wear a second badge, the neon green lanyard reading grid access in bold black lettering. like the day before, you clutch logan's hand for your own comfort until, much to your dismay, he's summoned for driver duties. you place a quick kiss on his cheek, and when you pull back, you aren't sure if the flush on his cheeks is from the affection or the miami heat. probably both.

"in case i don't see you before sprint. for luck."

"oh, you'll be in the garage. that's what this pass is for," logan says, holding your second badge in front of your face. "lily will show you where to go. i'll take a kiss anyways, though." you smile, stand on your toes, and kiss him, pulling back before he can wrap an arm around your waist. (that was a trick he very much enjoyed, as you'd learned the night before. there was something in him that needed you as close to him as possible, and it covered every nerve ending in your body in liquid fire.)

"off you go. you need to get race ready. i'll see you before you go out on the grid. don't worry." you gently shove him away with a smile, and you'd stare at him longer if your ankles weren't suddenly being attacked. you look down and squeal. "hi, leo! did your dad let you run free?" you squat down and scratch the mini daschund behind his disproportionally large ears, and he barks excitedly.

someone curses in french to your right, and you look up from the little golden ball of energy to see none other than charles leclerc frantically searching around. leo barks again, and the monégasque whips around, then locks eyes on you first, then his dog.

"merde, leo. you have too much energy for it being this early in the morning," he laughs as he walks over to you.

"i apologize, it appears i've unintentionally kidnapped your dog." you stand, and leo jumps at your calves again.

"ah, no harm, no foul," charles replies, picking up his dog and holding him close to his chest. "i will say, though, you look strangely familiar. have we met? my name is charles."

"we have not." you extend your hand and offer your name, and, when charles' eyebrows furrow and his head tilts in confusion, you realize that means nothing to him. "i'm logan's girlfriend."

"ah! yes, of course! he has a photo of the two of you at your high school graduation in his wallet. that's where i knew you from. well, it's nice to meet you!" that was news to you. logan has a picture of you in his wallet? either way, you just casually met one of the most famous people in the world like it was a standard tuesday.

if this is what i signed up for by being logan's girlfriend, then it is absolutely wild.

you're able to catch another good luck kiss with logan as he's almost fully suited up, and fuck, does he look good. his fireproof suit hangs low on his hips, the arms tied together in front of him. dark blue is a good color on him, and his facial hair is grown out in just the slightest. you can't lie, he looks hot as hell.

you cross your legs in an attempt to curb the heat that creeps down your tummy and between them. it doesn't work.

you amend it that night in logan's hotel room following his p10 in the sprint.

on sunday, you try to avoid thinking about the night before as you follow the same routine as the two days before- arriving early in the day, checking in at the williams motorhome, and then killing time until the driver's parade at 2:00 PM. you spend time with your new group of friends, spending the three remaining hours before the parade in the paddock club. rebecca, carlos' girlfriend, snickers at your shocked face when you see some of your idols and favorite celebrities casually walking around, gladly taking some photos for you as you're practically buzzing with excitement.

after the driver's parade, it's a whirlwind. you're swept back into the williams garage and find logan's driver's room relatively easily thanks to the help of some of the engineers and mechanics, but one of them stops you before you can venture too far into the depths of the hallways.

"could you tell him we have the pre-race strategy meeting in twenty minutes?"

"yeah, for sure." as you approach logan's door, you have to bite down on your lower lip to stifle the grin that wants to split your face. you knock on his door, and when he opens it, you know something's wrong. "lo, are you okay?" his eyes are red and his hand shakes on the doorknob. instead of a verbal response, he just opens the door a bit further to let you in, and, as soon as it shuts behind you, he sobs, and your heart shatters.

"i'm so scared. i'm so scared that something's going to happen and i'm going to let all of these people down and-" you gather him into your arms and he cries into the crook of your neck, your williams crewneck shirt now damp with his tears. you couldn't care less.

"you're going to do amazing, logie. i know you will." with your arms wrapped around him, it's almost like a weighted blanket of safety has encompassed him, and his sobs slow, his breaths growing deeper and more even. you continue murmuring words of confidence into his shoulder, and not a single word you say is empty.

"hey. look at me." you lean back and gently cup his cheek with your right palm, and when his eyes meet yours, you know that he needed to cry that one out. "do you feel a little bit better?" logan nods, tilting his head ever so slightly to kiss your palm, his own hand coming up to rest over yours. it's a cute, sappy, stupidly romantic moment that you from three weeks ago would've probably thought was the grossest thing known to mankind, but you can't help but bask in the moment. "is there anything i can do to help you feel better right now?" your voice is a soothing balm over logan's agitated nerves, and he slowly untangles himself from you and guides you over to the couch that's against the back wall, where he sits down and you curl up to his left side.

"can you just... talk? about anything?"

"are you seriously asking if me, the person with the most rampant adhd you've ever met, can talk about something? yes, logan, i absolutely can. what to talk about, though?"

as you talk, deciding to info dump about your favorite classical music piece, logan can't help but watch it unfold. he doesn't know jack shit about music theory, but listening to you ramble about something you're passionate about brings him so much peace. you're disturbed about fifteen minutes later by a knock at the door, promptly followed by a disembodied voice telling logan that it was time for the strategy meeting.

"aw, shit," he says, leaning his head back and rubbing at his eyes. "i have that to go to now."

"yeah, sorry. i was supposed to tell you about that but we had a bigger problem on our hands." your voice is sheepish now that your info dump has been cut short, but logan leans over to you and kisses you, soft and slow, just like the first time he kissed you properly in the park. when he pulls away, he looks so much calmer than he was twenty minutes before. "is there anything else i can do?"

"go have some fun in the paddock. and please drink some water." you roll your eyes and stand, bringing him in for another hug before you slip out of the door.

almost two hours later, you're back in the williams garage with a guest headset over your ears. your stomach twists with nerves as the national anthem concludes. lily's hand is clasped with yours.

"the first lap is the worst. after that, you lose a lot of the anxiety," she assures you, noticing how you chew your lower lip.

"thanks." you pause for a moment, contemplating another question. "does it ever get easier? seeing how they go out there and drive like absolute maniacs for fun?"

"it does. it took me a couple of months, but after alex showed me all of the safety features in the car and in his fireproofs, it definitely helped."

it's the moment you've been dreading.

one red light.

two.

three.

four.

five.

and then none.

the engines roar and the race has begun. lily didn't lie to you- the first lap is excruciatingly long, but when everyone's completed their first loop around the circuit, you let yourself breathe. your eyes are trained on the screen above you, and the laps are flying by so quickly that you barely process that the race is nearly halfway over.

but then logan's car is in the wall. fuck.

as you watch the replay of his crash, you can feel white-hot rage burning in your body. after the race stewards only declare a ten-second penalty and two super license points, though, you're fuming. "two penalty points and a ten-second penalty? magnussen caused logan's race to end, and they just let him go? they just forgive him and move on? how can he get away with that? this is bullshit!"

what a crash, what a rush

the first person logan looks for when he walks back into the williams garage, his visor still low over his eyes in shame, is you. when you see him walking towards the room where you and lily watch the race, you tear the headset off of your ears and run to him. the feeling of his arms wrapping around your shoulders and hearing his heartbeat even through your musician's earplugs soothes your agitated nerves. he's okay. he's alive. he isn't hurt. "thank fuck you're okay," you say, even though he definitely can't hear you through his helmet and over the roar of passing engines. when you pull away, you press a kiss to his knuckles and hope he understands how much love you're trying to convey through such a small gesture.

fuck me up, florida!

one of logan's best friends on the grid is oscar. oscar's teammate got his maiden win after almost five years of waiting in miami.

like any sensible person, you celebrate with him.

you have no idea what the name of the club is, much less how many drinks you've had so far, but what you do know is that lando has commandeered the dj station and logan is pressed against your back, his hands resting on your hips. the air is hot and thick, your heartbeat pounds in your head. the opening notes of bad bunny's tití me preguntó begin playing through the massive speakers, and you shoot a glare up to lando that he doesn't see, his focus instead on the equipment in front of him. when the bass hits, though, you let all apprehensiveness go and your genetics take the reins. your hips sway and swing to the beat, your hands wander up and down your torso, and logan simply follows your lead. it takes you a moment to realize that, if you want to get a rise out of him, you're going to have to spin around and face him.

with your hips swaying against his and how unbearably beautiful you look in the dim light, your skin glowing with sweat and your hair up in a high ponytail, logan can't help but lean down and kiss you when you finally turn around. you reciprocate gladly, your right leg slotting between both of his, and...

oh.

oh.

he's hard.

you pull away slightly, barely an inch between your lips. "slow your roll there, tiger."

"i don't want to." fire zips down your spine at the sound of his voice, low and breathy and so, so desperate. "need to fuck you."

"should we get outta here, then?"

"i thought you'd never ask." you smile and kiss him quickly, then take his hand and weave your way through the crowded dance floor. as the miami night air hits your face, you immediately feel cooler. you sigh, taking a moment to breathe and regulate your heart rate and body temperature, but you can't breathe for that long before logan wraps his arms around your waist, pulling you back against him and kissing your neck. you laugh, running your hands along his forearms.

"logan, not here. the hotel is two blocks away."

"i can't help it, baby, you just look so pretty," he hums, kissing the back of your neck once more before pulling away and stepping around to face you. "you look so pretty, and you're mine."

his possessiveness of you makes more heat zip down your spine, and you almost drool at how he's looking at you. his eyes, normally a beautiful mix between the blues of the sky and sea, ar"e almost completely dark, only a small sliver of his irises remaining, and the muscles in his jaw tick. "hotel. now."

by the time you reach the door to logan's hotel room, you're both out of breath from how hard he kissed you in the elevator and the arousal and need between your legs won't be stopped unless he replaces it. you stumble through the door and try to kiss logan again, matching the vigor he showed you in the elevator, but he stops you. "wanna take my time with you tonight."

"yeah?" you raise an eyebrow and inspect his face. the blinds are open but no lights are on, so all you can see is the side of his face that's illuminated by the lights from the streets of miami. it's an unusually beautiful sight.

"yeah. nothing about what i'm about to do to you is going to be fast. i'm gonna make you feel good tonight. how's that sound?"

"that sounds amazing, logan." you lean forward and kiss him gently, your lips slotting together as if you were made for each other. who knows, maybe you were. the next five minutes are a blur, but before you know it, you're laying back against the pillows on logan's bed and his face is buried between your thighs, his tongue working magic on your clit. the air in the hotel room is filled with your moans and the sounds of logan devouring you like a man starved, and it's the most beautiful mix of sounds you've ever heard. when he flicks his tongue oh-so-perfectly against your entrance, his nose brushing over your clit, you moan and pull his hair hard, which, in turn, makes him moan against you.

you aren't sure how much time passes or how many orgasms logan pulls from you with just his tongue and his fingers, but when you feel completely and entirely spent, your chest heaving and your hairline sparkling with tiny beads of sweat, you pull logan up to you by his shoulders, and he looks completely and entirely fucked. "need you inside of me," you mumble, wiping at the mix of spit and cum that coats the entire bottom half of his face with your thumbs. as if on instinct, you bring your hands to your mouth and lick them clean, and logan groans at the sight. "inside. now."

"as you wish, baby." logan's hands fumble at his boxers, the only item of clothing he was left wearing, and when he finally, finally pushes himself into you, you both moan. your hands scrabble at his shoulders and back, most definitely leaving red marks that will raise later, and his mouth latches onto your neck, biting down and then gently kissing over the red spot.

"nngh, lo-" your brain is short circuiting, logan's cock filling you up so perfectly and absolutely ruining you for any other man ever.

"yeah? you okay, baby?" he pulls back from your neck and scans your face for any sign of discomfort of pain, his sky blue eyes searching your own. the feeling of safety you get from just that one action is almost enough to make you sob from how good you feel because of him, both physically and emotionally.

"feels so good, lo. j'st... move, please."

"you sure? i don't wanna hurt you."

"positive. now please." you reach a hand up and pull him down towards you by the back of his neck, tangling your fingers in his hair and pulling hard. "fuck me properly." without wasting a second, logan reaches a hand down and hooks it under your left thigh, bringing your leg up to rest around his waist, then pulling back and thrusting back in fast. the moan that rips itself from your throat is sinful, and your breath is being punched from your lungs at the downright brutal pace logan's setting. your right leg finds itself locking around his waist, only bringing him infinitely closer, and now, each time he thrusts back into you, your clit bumps against his pelvis. within minutes, you're embarrassingly close to cumming again, and through your garbled mumbling and clawing at his shoulders, he understands, reaching his right hand down to gently press against your clit.

"cum for me, baby, please, need to feel you cum for me just one more time, just let go, i've got you." it's logan's voice that ultimately sends you pummelling over the edge into an orgasm that makes your back arch and your vision fuzz at the edges, and you cum with a cry of his name. his hips slow and his fingers maintain a steady rhythm on your clit, but you can tell it's taking its toll on him. "where- where do you want me to cum?"

"i'm on the pill, lo. inside, baby, please," you whine, and it takes two more thrusts before logan groans, his hips coming to a shuddering halt as he cums inside of you. it's a beautiful sight, too- his eyes scrunched closed and his eyebrows drawn together, his hair a complete mess from where your hands had pulled at it. your hands run through his hair and along his back, and you patiently wait as he comes back to earth.

"hi," he murmurs, opening his eyes and smiling down at you.

"hi," you respond.

no other words need to be said. you know you love him, and he knows he loves you.

and you're both okay with that.

this took me way longer to write than i thought it would, but i absolutely love it! reminder that my asks and requests are open, and i always get excited when i get feedback! take care of urselves lovies <3

[ijwrsmff]

hiiii, I was wondering if you could write live action mihawk and reader dining at the baratie?(it doesnt have to be meeting the crew, it could just be a date?) have a wonderful day! <333

I most certainly can!!! He was cast so well, my god. I don't think there's been any casting in the Live Action that wasn't just. Perfectttttttt. Sanji shows up briefly, but it's before he joined the strawhats. I've also only seen Mihawk's intro, so all my knowledge of this fic was based off that and what I know about him in the anime. So if things are a little bit off I'm sorry :,3 I plan to watch more tonight after writing for a while.

He's very soft in this one.

Word Count: 1,270

Today was special! It would be your six month anniversary with your boyfriend. It was odd at first, even considering dating the greatest swordsman in the world. He was cold and calculating, but he did have a soft side. You were glad you gave him the chance, and got to see it. 

He was never embarrassed to be with you, and in fact…showed you off with pride. He would sit and feed you if you asked, doted on you, whatever you wanted. A dominant soul, but he was aware of that and embraced it. He would always be at your beck and call. Protecting you, even just with his status in the world. No one dared mess with you. 

Mihawk had suggested the place that you met as your anniversary date. The Baratie, world renowned. Often people would sit on the waitlist around holidays, or even just weekends. But he never needed a reservation, he was a loyal customer at this point. It was a special place to you both, and it would be the perfect location for any anniversary. 

“Would you like me to order for you?” He knew you could get anxious about ordering, so he always offered. You didn’t always even need him to, but it was a nice gesture. “What would you like? I could order it. Never worry about price, darling.” He smiled momentarily, not showing his smile often. Unless he was with you. It was heartwarming, to say the least. 

Mihawk wasn’t the most wealthy man in the world…but he was pretty damn close. Not everyone can afford their own island and castle. But he certainly could, and with ease, too. He still managed to be humble, in some ways despite that fact. He would continue to buy you anything you could ever want. He’d make sure you got it, as soon as you did so much as to look at something for a few seconds. 

“I’m okay! I can order this time.” You smiled at him, and he nodded in confirmation, smiling back momentarily. “What are you gonna get?” You looked through the menu for a little bit, trying to decide on some of your favorites. They always have such good food. It was hard to pick most of the time, and they probably knew it too. 

“I’ll go with my usual, do you need help picking something?” He offered, always willing to help you. He could be so considerate, and kind. Not to everyone, but especially to you. “I can recommend something based on your likes and dislikes.” He smiled, this time for longer. He could always relax more when you were around. It may not look like it to others, but he was pretty relaxed right now, enjoying your anniversary with him as much as you were. 

“Hm…I was thinking about these two, but I can’t decide which one I want more!” You looked at the menu for so long that you didn’t notice the waiter coming to your table until he spoke. It startled you a bit, and you jumped, making both the waiter and Mihawk chuckle. 

The waiter’s name was Sanji, and he looked at you with what could have been hearts for eyes. But he knew better than to say anything after last time. Wouldn’t stop him from looking though. When you were here before, he had flirted with you. Mihawk…being him was confident you wouldn’t leave him for the waiter. But he did warn him with a “If you’d like to keep your hands, I suggest you keep them away from my partner.” He was protective, but you knew he wouldn’t actually fight the waiter. 

Mihawk didn’t result to violence, so you knew it was an empty threat. His amused look he directed at you proved that fact. Sanji didn’t know that though, and raised his hands in defeat, saying you’d be protected well by the greatest swordsman in the world. “Allowed” Mihawk to be with you. Because apparently according to him you needed that affirmation. It was amusing to the both of you, at least. 

Dinner went by smoothly, and you talked the majority of the time. Mihawk was an amazing listener, but not too much of a talker. He was more content to listen to everything you said, and his memory was so good he had no problem remembering all the stories you told. Sometimes he would pitch in, or ask active listening questions to show you had his undivided attention. 

Out of nowhere though, he tilted his head and looked at you as if you were the brightest star in the sky, uttering an “I love you.” As you were about to finish your food. He did like to throw that out there often, and only became more frequent as your relationship progressed. “Would you like to order a dessert?” It was another way he said he loved you. By offering you what he could effortlessly provide. 

“Mhm! And I love you too.” You giggled and finished your food, as he flagged down the waiter and ordered your favorite dessert they had. You didn’t even have to tell him what it was, he remembered. He always did. “Would you like to share it?” Was your offer, though you already knew his answer. 

“One bite will suffice. The dessert is for you, afterall.” He smiled, and allowed you to talk until the dessert arrived. Once it did, he opened his mouth expectantly, waiting for you to feed it to him. 

You did so, without being prompted to. It was always so cute to you when you fed each other. He could care less if the people in the restaurant saw the display of affection. He swirled the spoon with his tongue, making eye contact with you the whole time. 

“You’re such a tease!” You giggled and he smiled softly. It was a funny and domestic moment, and it made you say, “I do love you though. No matter how much of a tease you can be.” As you winked at him. He winked back, but relaxed in his seat while you ate. 

Reclining a bit, you finished the dessert. He talked for a bit through it, mostly how his island was doing since you hadn’t been to it in a couple weeks. As much as you loved him listening, he had such a soothing voice. It was cool, and deliberate. He never said something that wasn’t important. Or a compliment to you, which was just as important to him as it could be. 

He packaged up your remaining entre for you, and stood up to leave. “That was a wonderful date, darling.” He said as he left the money on the table. It had a generous tip, since he always makes sure to do so. “Would you like me to drop you off at your island?” His arm was around your waist, to make sure you didn’t fall off when getting onto his small “boat”. 

“I wouldn’t mind spending time on your island! I know we won't get back anytime soon…but it’s your home.” You smiled, and sat on his lap when he made his place on the boat. “I’d like to spend more time with you!” He wrapped his arms around your middle, and the boat began to move. 

“One day it will be OUR home. I never mind spending more time with you, either.” He sighed, and rested his head on your shoulder. “Whenever you’re ready, it can be yours.” He placed a soft kiss on your cheek, making you giggle. 

“We’ll have time. As long as you’ll have me.” 

“Now and always.” 

[mlbigbang]

2023 Marichat & Ladrien Fic Rec List

It’s the end of the year which means it’s finally time for the ML Big Bang’s yearly fic rec lists! We’re really excited to bring you our contributors’ favourite fics started this year to supply you with plenty of reading material while you’re waiting for the Big Bang fics’ publication in January.

Boulangérella by @aidanchaser

Once upon a time, magic was wild. The two princes of the kingdom have been tasked with choosing their brides by the end of their 21st birthday celebrations. Crown Prince Adrien Agreste will have to choose between a woman who can protect his kingdom, a woman offering the power to wake his sleeping mother, and the woman he has loved and admired for the past year. Then there's also the seamstress that he is suddenly falling for. By the time he realizes he doesn't have the power to choose at all, it may be too late.

It's a creative Cendrillon retelling with the kwamis as fay, Adrien as the kingdom's prince and most wanted thief, and Marinette as the seamstess and superhero partner stealing Adrien's heart twice over.

Scary, like a little black purring kitten by @h-sunnywet-d

The calendar just turned into October, and Chat Noir has to make sure that his Good Friend Marinette appreciates the new season wholeheartadly. It sure won't backfire on the long run.

Just An Ordinary Girl by @kasienda

Chat Noir and the other heroes are in a bit of trouble, and Ladybug wanted just one weekend off! But luckily they know someone who can help. Someone who is just an ordinary girl…

you will never sleep alone (i'll love you) by @ladyofthenoodle

Marinette had saved up for months to be able to afford this vacation. Not only that, but she’d spent months trying to convince herself that it was okay to even take a vacation, that Monarch was really and truly gone. Which was why Tikki was at home with Alya, so that Marinette could actually relax and enjoy the plush amenities the hotel had to offer, such as a bed that looked like it cost five times her monthly salary. Or, she would be able to enjoy it, if she wasn’t standing in the middle of the villa she’d booked over a month ago, fighting for the bed with freaking Chat Noir, of all people.

May I introduce myself, Your Highness? by @chocoluckchipz

Whether picking up a stray animal off the streets or saving a dying child at the market, Adrien had always strived to be the best version of himself. Truly, he would've been the perfect candidate to be snatched up by a kwami, were he an orphan, dying somewhere remote after a short life full of nothing but suffering and misery. Yet as it stood, the sole heir to the French throne had little to complain about. Apart from, perhaps, a complete absence of a love life. That is until a mysterious girl, wandering around his gardens at night, catches his attention.

This fic has it all - Ladrien, royalty, fairy tale elements, magic and disguises! It's an enthralling read and one of my absolute favorite fics from 2023.

The Perfect Date by @peachcitt

“I dare you to ask this special someone on the date you just described.” “I totally will,” Adrien says with confidence, looking into the camera and nodding resolutely. “Scout’s honor.” He holds up the kitten as if swearing an oath. There is a space of silence. “Right now,” Hanna says. Adrien stares at her. “I’m daring you to ask that person out right now,” she says. or adrien has a little slip up during a live interview, and ladybug hears. for the golden hour zine!!

reserved by @luckyyoyo

“Don’t you think,” he coughed, a blush creeping up his cheeks, “this kind of thing should be.. reserved for my girlfriend?” He gestured to their poses. A squeak came from her mouth and her knees buckled, but surprisingly still had no struggle keeping Adrien up. “You know, you could always be my girlfriend.” Ladybug, saviour of Paris and local damsel-in-distress Adrien Agreste, suggests he gets a fake girlfriend to ward off his zombie fans. While lovingly holding him in her arms, of course. Adrien, far too comfortable in her arms, suggests it could be her. Introducing your superheroine pretend-girlfriend to your strict, uninterested father is a bit harder than Adrien realises.

Displaced by @kasienda

Adrien loosened his tie and dropped his suit jacket unceremoniously across the back of the sofa that was already cluttered with unopened boxes, mail, and unfolded laundry. He really should have listened to Nino and hired a maid or cleaning person of some sort. But well, he still had a secret to keep, and keeping that secret was more important to him than ever. He moved to his bedroom on autopilot without turning on the light, intending to collapse into bed immediately. But when he tried to slip into his space, he found it was already occupied. He flipped his phone flashlight on towards the ceiling to light the room in a soft glow. In his wife’s place, Ladybug lay sprawled diagonally across the bed.

here comes the rush before we touch (come a little closer) by @ladyofthenoodle

When an akuma attacks during Adrien Agreste's beach themed photoshoot on a dreary day in Paris, Ladybug is on the scene immediately. Unfortunately, with a glimpse of Adrien's alluring abdomen and without her partner, it's not long before she's hit, and Adrien with her—but maybe Ladybug can afford a little vacation with the boy she loves. He's certainly not complaining.

On Borrowed Time by @miabrown007

The life of Paris’ Golden Boy is all shine and glamour; blindingly bright smiles, neverending parties, bargaining for just a shard of time for being happy. But that’s alright; Adrien has long given up the false hope that someone will get it. That is precisely why it’s a spectacle when she does, when she barges in like a hurricane in crimson and turns his life upside down. Heaven knows, it’s time for the wind of change.

[painedpen]

Hi, i wanted to ask about your Mondo Oowada headcanons and platonic pairings :) i want to hear a rant, so dont worry about rambling

Okay so I’ve already answered an ask about my Mondo hcs, so now we’re gonna talk about my Kiyotaka hcs because he’s my second specialest little guy.

Fluff:

- Taka only really relaxes when he’s at home. He lets himself slouch and put his feet up while he works on a project. His manner of speech is much more casual when talking to his father. All around it’s the only time he can truly be peaceful.

- Takaaki’s grandfather came to the country from Spain, and thus the whole family is fluent in Spanish. This, of course, includes Taka. He speaks so fast it’s almost impossible to understand him when he’s speaking Spanish.

- His dad read somewhere that ear piercings could help soothe migraines, and decided to take Taka to get a couple for his birthday. Taka refuses to wear his ear cuffs anywhere outside the house, but he likes them because they make for good tactile and audio stims.

- Obviously autistic. Like c’mon.

- He is Very Normal about martial arts and weaponry. He researches extensively, and practices extensively as well. Because of this, he has a bizarrely wide knowledge of how to kill or seriously maim people.

- He actually spars with Sakura quite a bit. While he definitely can’t beat her, she enjoys that Taka is a bit more of a challenge than other people.

- Because of poverty and such, he was never able to afford good ingredients, so he only knows how to cook very basic dishes. He’s the best at making those basic dishes, though.

- You want ramen but don’t have the energy to make it yourself? Go to Taka, cause his ramen will have you meeting God so you can spiritually high five Her.

- You do have to specify not to put a crazy amount of spices in it though. He and his dad have so much spice tolerance it’s honestly concerning.

- He tries so hard to be well behaved, but growing up with Takaaki has had its side effects. Taka’s startle response is to excessively swear in Spanish. He’s mortified with himself every time.

- Honestly he’s so much more chill when he’s not in a professional environment. If you’re not at school or work he doesn’t give a shit if you swear or whatever. Just don’t do it in front of kids and he’s fine.

- Protesting king. Oh, it’s against the rules for people to wear their pride pins? Guess who’s walking down the halls wearing a rainbow flag as a cape? It’s Kiyotaka Ishimaru, motherfucker.

- Has probably been detained before due to involvement in protests. He’s always peaceful, but if the attending officers get a bit too eager, he’s gotta do what he’s gotta do.

- Can leap over an eight-foot-tall fence in a single bound, and will at the slightest hint of provocation.

- If he’s too focused on his work, the filter between his brain and mouth will forget to work. It’s honestly so entertaining because he’ll just say whatever comes to mind, no matter how insulting or rude it is.

Angst: (CW for Violence, Child Abuse, Scars, Eating Disorders)

- Okay here we fuckin go.

- Taka has more scars than anyone else in his class. Some are from his grandfather (more on that later), but most of them are from his grandfather’s enemies.

- As everyone has already guessed, Toranosuke wasn’t all that great to Taka. He would spend weekends babysitting sometimes, and would force Taka to study for days.

- He would lock Taka in his room and wouldn’t let him out until he decided that Taka had done enough. Sometimes Taka would go the whole weekend without any food.

- At one point, Taka tried to sneak out to get something to drink, but his grandfather caught him. Long story short, that’s how he got that huge scar on his shoulder.

- Taka dissociates while he studies now. He absorbs the information, but he’ll be mumbling to himself about “yes, sir… I’ll do better, sir… sorry sir…” even though no one else is in the room with him.

- This boy has had more pints of coffee than hours of sleep in his lifetime.

- He will mix black coffee and five hour energy and down the whole thing in under a minute. Everyone who knows him worries for his health.

- He obviously struggles with nightmares, so he’ll study or work out to avoid sleeping most nights. He normally stays awake until he collapses from exhaustion.

- Touch used to be a huge No for him. Even Takaaki could barely pat him on the shoulder for a long time. When Makoto first held his face, Taka started sobbing.

- Sometimes he’ll genuinely forget that people can be kind. When he sees someone doing something nice for him or others, it kinda knocks the breath out of him because “That’s so strange… I forgot people had the capacity for it…”

- Will straight up not eat for days. He got so used to being without food as a child that having three meals a day will actively make him sick.

- He does not trust teachers in the slightest. He’ll be respectful to them, but he’d rather bite off his own tongue than ask one for help.

- This is mainly because of his middle school days. Other students would beat him to a pulp, and the teachers would just stare at him, in a puddle of his own blood, and walk away.

- There was one teacher who did something worse than that, but I don’t feel comfortable going into details at this moment. Use your imagination, it’s probably as bad as you think.

Platonic Pairings:

Kiyotaka + Sayaka:

- I’m so smart for this just let me explain.

- Sayaka asked him to teach her how to do several Latin dances, and they’ve been best friends ever since.

- They really relate to each other in the sense that they both have had to work extremely hard in order to achieve their goals. They both believe that hard work can achieve anything.

- The entire idol group loves Taka, but Sayaka is the only one he sees everyday.

- He hangs out with the lot of them very often, and they help him loosen up a bit.

Kiyotaka + Aoi:

- This one is so obvious.

- Hina is Colombian, so she was ecstatic to find another Spanish speaker in her class. She constantly clowns on Kiyotaka’s accent though.

- They’re both so passionate about the things they care about it’s so cute to watch them interact.

- I think Taka is one of the only people that can keep up with Hina’s energy level consistently.

Kiyotaka + Kyoko:

- They are childhood friends.

- Think about it. Taka’s dad is a detective, so is Kyoko’s grandfather. Kyoko’s grandfather is too smart to fall for the whole “all Ishimaru’s are evil blegh!” thing.

- I’m saying they hung out when they were little. I’m right too.

- Taka helps Kyoko express her emotions more clearly while Kyoko helps Taka calm down and focus his mind.

Kiyotaka + Peko:

- Top tier sword bros.

- Taka saw Peko training one day and promptly decided that she was the coolest person to ever exist.

- Peko admires his true passion for the art of swordplay. He reminds her of herself when she was younger.

- I’m making Peko sound like an old woman here please excuse me.

- Taka admires her so much it’s so cute. He calls her Shishou until Peko asks him to stop. After that he sticks to Peko-Senpai.

Kiyotaka + Gonta:

- Sobbing crying throwing up punching the air.

- Gonta wants to be a gentleman and Taka is one of the best people to go to for lessons in etiquette.

- They are autistic together.

- Gonta calls Taka Senpai exactly one time. Taka starts crying cause he’s so honored. Gonta thinks he hurt Taka’s feelings. He never calls Taka Senpai again.

- Taka liked bugs as a kid, and still kinda does, so he and Gonta get along so well.

*Insert autism creature Yippee sound byte*

[butts-bouncing-on-the-beltway]

Mystery chickens arrive Wednesday and I'm so fucking hyyyyyyyype. I'm also nearly done with my week (especially since I have a short day tomorrow) and while I do have some paperwork and cleaning and henhouse set up this weekend (plus birthday shenanigans) I am hoping to relax a little and maybe get myself in order.

I pruned the seed lists down a bit as well so that the initial purchases are more affordable, and hopefully that means I will be able to buy a round with each of the next two pay periods. That should let me sow just in time for the end of the month and the beginning of summer (perfect timing for veggies given our long growing season here). That means we'll be able to have the hens and the garden up and running by the end of the summer, and I can finally start to relax about groceries. I do still need to find a good place to buy our bulk shelf stable goods, but once I do we can buy those monthly, gather our produce and eggs daily with a little biweekly supplement from the farmer's market, and have a weekly butcher trip, and we should be back to an affordable grocery budget again.

The bills are back to being manageable, and are all paid off except for the insurance which I called about today and nearly had a heart attack about but should be able to get paid off next month. I need to find about $400 for it that I'm not totally sure about right now, but I will make that happen.

I want to be able to keep up with my work as best I can, and I also want to start trying to be more proactive about my non-work time so I'm not feeling so overwhelmed and burnt out. We're mostly settled into the house now, and while we're behind schedule (understandably lol) of where I'd hoped to be by now, I think I can make our life plans keep working on a reasonable timeline if I just keep chipping away. For one, I want to get a clothesline so I can start handwashing our and line drying our clothes rather than continuing to spend our money and time at the laundromat. I did pick up septic safe laundry powder I can use in the upstairs bathtub. All I have to do now is buy and run a clothesline. Pretty sure I know where I want to run it too, as wifey and I have discussed that previously. Might look into a vintage washing board too if I can find one, as I HATE having to scrub and spin in the tub by hand. That should keep us until we can save up for our combo unit, or at least a washing machine.

I know wifey wants to look for a couch and a dining table with chairs for us. And I'd like to snag a buikt in sewing table for my office, maybe a small loom if I can find an affordable one. I might even set up a lace making station in my lil alcove I think, it has great lighting for the fine motor work.

The yard still needs trees and bushes planted, but honestly that may just be a next year project. I may have to accept that. That's okay though. Gives me time to better clear out the invasive jasmine and see how the rhizomatics alter the soil composition. Maybe this year we focus on the soil, the chickens, and the basic functions like the couch and sewing machine and clothesline. And then next year we can focus more on trees and bushes, washing machine, and creek rehab. Things that are likely to be more expensive or time consuming/complex.

I am really looking forward to digging into creek rehabilitation when we get to that point. The creek has visibly slowed it's momentum as time passes, and I can see the debris crowding out the water flow, but as we shore up the creek walls, add native water plants to filter and aerate the water, and reinvigorate the ecosystem, I'm hoping that we'll start seeing amphibians and salamanders more often. Right now we get large animals and some wild birds, so I think there must be at least some insect populations, but I know the dynamics of the creek are pretty limited at the moment. With luck that'll change quickly once the right natives are in place. There's an existing creek restoration project in the city I'm hoping to volunteer with and get some tips from on how to implement ours.

Anyway, I'm just really feeling optimistic, even if I know that there's still a lot of work ahead of us. It feels like the work is actually happening. Fingers crossed we're able to keep making headway.

[softsky-daily]

11/13/2023

It's interesting how even in the night the clouds can still appear so bright in pictures.

Positive thing: I got through practicum and I don't have to go back next week, and I finally had some rest.

One of my clients had their last session today and they were absolutely not having it. I did feel stressed and awkward about having to tell them this was the end of our sessions for real but I got through it and now I can relax a long while.

I'll probably be going to my dad's for Thanksgiving, which is fine since I get along with him and everything but that means I won't have access to my big fancy PC for like 2 days. On the plus side, maybe if I'm lucky we can get the Szechuan chicken at this one local restaurant that I love and can't get anywhere else. But they might end up closed because of Thanksgiving so we'll see.

After the weekend I had it is nice to get back to the status quo a bit. I feel like there are a thousand things to get stressed about and having anything extra add to it makes me want to evaporate but my countdown app says there's 23 days until my California trip so I'm trying to keep my mind on that. I feel a little bad because my friend is basically paying for everything except the plane ticket but I know I wouldn't be able to afford it otherwise so I'm grateful to him. I'm excited to eat a bunch of good food while I'm there, and also excited to walk around somewhere that isn't humid hell.

Anyways, besides all that I'm really craving takoyaki since the line was too long to get it at the Japan festival yesterday. Maybe sometime this week I'll stop somewhere and grab some.

[shinra-makonoid]

Do anti-anxiety meds work that fast? I though those were like you have to take them consistently to work. I've never taken any anti anxiety or depression meds and I would be nervous to, but do those meds normally make people stop daydreaming? Doesnt everyday dream at all times, unless being spoken to or like watching a movie?

Benzodiazepines are a muscle relaxant, so in about 20mins or so you're supposed to feel more drowsy/more relaxed/drunkish/slower. In my case there is certainly a part of placebo-effect going into it, I've been using them about once every month or every 2 months for more than 7 years. However, the effect of the specific med I should usually lasts for a couple of days. The next day from taking it, I was still visibly slowed down as one of my peers remarked. Which is why I usually try to take it before the weekend begins for ex.

My anxiety (again idk how other people work but that's how I see it in myself) tends to build up over time until I freak out, and I often have to take one antianxiety every one/two month. So I usually get one or two to get back to a baseline functional level, and then it builds up over time again. It's some kind of background anxiety thing going on. I won't have a panic attack like I used to, but it's always there like a static sound going on, and the static becomes louder and louder with time, until all I can hear is the static. And nothing really helps but those pills to really decrease it. Sport only marginally reduces it, even though I do sport twice a week, which is annoying but eh, one benzodiazepine every one or two months to function normally is not the worst either. This is a difficult and stressful year, which is probably why.

I think it doesn't stop people from daydreaming, more like, for me daydreaming is at least partly from a coping mechanism from anxiety, which is why I said maladaptive. Reality becomes too bad and too stressfull and so my brain is like "time to get some specific fantasies in your head because reality is awful" and I could spend the whole day doing that because of it, and nothing else. So when I get less anxious, I daydream less, because my brain can face reality without freaking out. Idk how other people work, but the only times I've been extremely obsessed over something and/or daydreaming constantly, were during times where I felt I had no control over my life and was extremely anxious. It's escaping.

I feel that way currently because this year is hell. I can't really afford to give up because it's still going on and I want to become a doctor nonetheless. But I don't have the time to really process what this lack of control means for the next few years either. I have doubts, even tho I want it. So my brain is noping out of it and I have to carefully negotiate with it in order to continue, basically. And when it doesn't, well... I have no choice but to use meds.

It's not like I choose to daydream in those case, it's like daydreams have little grabby hands catching me and I have to put energy into resisting it, which brings brain fog and tiredness etc. I used to daydream all the time including during school, and I could very much daydream in a movie, I could stop doing everything just to go to my bed and daydream the whole day no problem. I wouldn't consider that a typical everyday person daydreaming. You could argue this is normal behaviour, it's debatable tbh, I don't consider it normal for me because of precedents showing me when this typically occurs (horrible moments of my life). Moreover, it impacts my ability to function, to study, and so I can't really afford doing that this semester. I will be able to when classes are finished, and this perspective gives my brain something to hold on to to focus in the present time.

I can still daydream a bit when I'm on the bus or before sleeping, and I do, but I don't feel the urge to literally spend my whole day daydreaming, like I got during this weekend. So whether it's placebo or the med, it helped me.

[alchemist-of-altoids]

Danny was in the middle of fighting Skulker when he got a text. It was the tone he’d set for his mom. Weird. It’s 2:30 in the afternoon on a Saturday. He wasn’t grounded, there wasn’t a family event. He was going to wait until after the fight to check, but then the tone came again. His mom NEVER double texted. He held his hand up in a stop motion. Skulker seemed more shocked and confused than actually respecting of the action.

“Can you help me clean the fridge?”

“The cheese is moldy.”

That’s 2 code phrases in a row. His mom needed his help. Fast.

“Sorry Skulker, I gotta wrap this up.” Danny said, pulling out his thermos. “Family emergency came up, so this whole song and dance is gonna have to wait.”

“What!? No, you can’t reschedule! Do you have any ide-“ Skulker didn’t get chance to finish as he was trapped in the thermos.

“I’m on my way mom. I hope I’m not too late.” Danny said.

***

“Maddie, you really should visit sometime! It feels much more like a home when you’re there!” Vlad continued his barely disguised attempt at flirting with her.

“Oh count on it V-Man! You can’t keep the Fenton’s away from our number one!” Jack exclaimed happily. The one small spark of joy Maddie had at the moment was seeing Vlad’s discomfort.

“I’m not sure sweetie. I don’t know if we can afford to take a break to go all the way to his mansion. Amity needs us. And besides, Danny’s grades are finally starting to improve. We can’t do anything that might jeopardize that.” Maddie said, desperately hoping that they could move on.

“Mads-“ Jack barely started before the door swung open.

“Mooom, Daaad, I’m home!” Danny called as he walked in. Maddie let out a silent cry of relief, knowing that if anyone could help, it was her son. “Oh, heeeeeey Vlad! How’s it going?”

Maddie saw Vlad clench his jaw as her son walked in. She still had no idea what caused this rivalry between them, as it began before she even realized how much Vlad had changed, but it was *exactly* what she needed right now.

“Ah, Daniel. It’s great to see you.” Vlad said, a vein on his forehead popping. “However, I’m in the middle of a conversation with your parents at the moment so run along now Little Badger.”

“Danno!” Jack shouted, somehow missing everything Vlad had just said. “You knock out that project with your friends?”

“Yep! Everything’s all taken care of. I might even get to relax this weekend.” Danny said with a chuckle. “But, I’ll probably work on some extra credit. If I can get honor roll this semester then my GPA’ll finally be where it needs to be if I want to work at NASA.”

“That’s my son!” Jack proclaimed. “We Fenton’s fall, but we always spring back up, better than ever!”

Maddie smiled at her husband. For all that he could be oblivious, he really was so sweet. It’s moments like these that make her fall in love with him all over again. She even spies Danny looking a bit uncomfortable, but also flattered.

“Oh, Danny you’ll never guess what Vladdie was just saying!” Jack said.

“He’s decided to give up all his money and life a simple life as the crazy cat guy in a small South American village?” Maddie held back a chuckle at that. She’s always loved his sense of humor. He definitely took part of hers and Jacks (especially their love of puns and gross over exaggerations) but his had developed so much farther. She’s proud to say that her son is one of the funniest people she’s ever met.

“Haha! Ooh, you kill me Danny!” Jack laughed. And Maddie could swear she heard Vlad mutter “If only” under his breath. “He was saying we should visit more often! Doesn’t that sound great?”

“Oh, you know how much I love spending time with Uncle Vlad!” Danny said. To anyone who didn’t know him, he came across as shockingly genuine. But Maddie knew him. She knew how much he disliked Vlad and she knew his tells. “But I’m not sure how much time I’ll have! Between extra credit, working at the Nasty Burger, helping you guys in the lab, and remember Jazz wanted me to your colleges with her? Something about getting me excited for my post high school education?”

“Ah darnit.” Jack said. He sounded so truly sad and dejected, that Maddie felt a little guilty.“You’re right. We’re so chalk busy I don’t know if we’ll have time to visit you V-Man. But we can certainly make the most of the visits we have!”

With that, Jack stood up and walked into the kitchen.

“This hangout needs more snacks!” Jack shouted. As he was the kitchen, Vlad started speaking again.

“You know-“ However, he was interrupted by Danny’s phone going off.

“Hey Mr. Foley!” Danny said. “Oh yeah, she’s right here. Lemme out my phone on speaker.”

Danny held out his phone and, as he said he would, put it on speaker phone.

“Maddie, can you hear me?” Came the voice from the phone.

“Yes, I can hear you Maurice.” Maddie said. “Is everything alright?”

“Oh yes, everything’s fine!” He reassured her. “I was just had something I needed to talk to you and Danny about. Are you free to come over? I hate to push, but it’s rather urgent.”

Maddie was a little confused until she looked at her son. Somehow, THIS was his plan. He’d gotten Maurice in on it.

“Of course!” Maddie said happily. “We’ll be right over.

“I’m so sorry Vlad. I’d love to stay and catch up, but this sounds important.” Maddie said. “Jack! Maurice needs to talk to me and Danny! We’re heading over to the Foley’s so you and Vlad have the house to yourselves for the day!”

“Alright! You’re the best Maddie!” Jack said. “Didya hear that Vladdie? It’s just you and me today! Just like old times!”

“Well, look at the time!” Vlad said. “I really just be-“

“You gotta see out latest project-“ Jack’s voice was cut off as Maddie and Danny left.

“Thanks sweetie.” Maddie said, kissing him on the forehead. He pushed her away, like any teenage boy. But she could see the fondness hidden under his scowl. She relented and just smiled at him.

“Of course. Any opportunity to mess with that cheesehead.” He said.

“So how’d you get Maurice to agree to this?” Maddie asked, brimming with curiosity.

“Oh, I didn’t.” Danny said. Maddie looked at him quizzically. “Turns out, Tucker sounds just like his dad over the phone. Switch his contact name and boom. Instant call from his dad.”

“Mhmm. And I’m sure you’ve never used this yourself?” She said, raising her eyebrow and scowling comically.

“Of course not! How could you! My own mother!” Danny gasped dramatically, putting his hand on his forehead and pretend-fainting. They laughed as they walked down the sidewalk.

“Have you eaten yet?” Maddie asked.

“That depends.” Danny replied. “You offering food?”

Maddie smiled. She really had the best kids. No matter how much they argue or disagree, at the end of the day, she loves them more than anything. And that will never change.

we don’t give danny & maddie enough credit for being in cahoots. cmon guys ik at least ten of us watched maternal instincts. maddie said “keep old bate-breath entertained till i can find a phone” with the confidence of a woman who’s definitely seen her son do improv for personal gain. there’s no way she doesn’t text him when she’s in awkward conversations to call her with a pretend emergency

[thedovahcat]

Gorillas Getting Judged

Tomorrow's my assessment and I am hella nervous but a little excited but also mostly nervous.

I think I'm as ready as I'll ever possibly be about it and I've been talking about it with my friends about the likelihood of x y z and what may possibly happen and all that

Wuff.. the sooner all this is over the better... even if this is something I've wanted to know about for a long time, it's still very like...anxiety-inducing.

It's just an interview. Not like it's a job or anything. I hope I get a result I'm happy with, some days I still feel like "yeah nothing is probably up with me maybe I did this for nothing" and others I'm very confident about I guess having some sort of disorder going on.

I'd really like a professionals opinion and that's coming up. The only thing I'm terrified of is being written off. But, this maybe won't be the case if I'm doing this independantly of insurance and general doctors and all that...

So...

We'll see!! If it's some INCONCLUSIVE type answer then frankly I don't know what I'll do. What can I do though? Can't keep running to multiple places, cuz then it'll feel like I'm just probing for someone to tell me what I want. And I don't want that, ironically speaking.

I’m still really upset and pissed off that my parents still don’t take things like this seriously, and honestly they may never. Which, is just something I’ll have to deal with. I can’t be open with this kind of stuff about them, can’t talk about it unless it’s only happening to someone else. Minority families are just like that, what can I say? There’s that stigma attached to it like so many other things and mental illness in the family?? Ohoho boy you best get prepared to be yelled at and told off that it’s all fake and nothing you feel is real. No support at all. I’ve talked about this kind of thing before though so, nothing new there. Dad’s still harping on and on about how I better hear the answer I want to hear and I better get my money’s worth because it’s such a rip off etc etc. Like... I’m getting this assessment done without being on a huge waiting list, without paying exorbitant fees- I’m really lucky I can afford something like this for myself to be honest. And I’m in a good position right now to be able to have an assessment done in the first place. So yeah...

Hhhh.. moving along...on top of that, I got all my new computer parts so I've been making a backup of my system but that's taking so long. I have effectively banished myself from computer games so I wish I woulda planned that a bit better. Oh well.. by the weekend I'll have jazzy new parts and a speedier computation machine so.. something to look forward to.

There’s not much else to be said in the meantime, at least until tomorrow perhaps. Hopefully my mind won’t be blown to smithereens and I’ll be feeling OK or better than that. Something positive. It’s been a real emotional and tense week (and it’s only going to be Wednesday). With all the college stuff mounting, I’m just... I’m tired. I want to relax, I want a break, I wanna do stuff I like doing and continue on like normal... But for now I can’t.

Gotta schedule Tato’s dental speaking of which... I’m a bit nervous about that but my mom’s already made an appointment for the other cat so I’m going to see how his appt turns out before taking Tato in for his teeth cleaning. The vet said they were really gnarly (which was surprisingly cuz the previous vet said nothing about this) so I hope it doesn’t come down to like.... a ton of extractions or whatever the case. I’d feel bad and so would my wallet, but hey, gotta do whatever is necessary to keep that boi healthy.

That’s it for now though...

Wish me...luck??? I guess? Thu..mbs up?

[giorno-plays-piano]

Vicious

Part VII

Pairing: Steve x reader, Bucky x reader, Thor x reader, Loki x reader, Peter x reader

Warnings: yandere, obsession, stalking, possessiveness, theft, mention of blackmail, all characters are adults.

Words: 1864.

Summary: Transferring to Stark Academy that has only allowed to take in female students last semester, you realize you are just one of three young women among hundreds of students. Your things are constantly being stolen, and soon you begin fearing for your safety.

Part I

Part II

Part III

Part IV

Part V

Part VI

________

You wanted to slap yourself. What the hell was wrong with you today? Why did you tell Peter that?!

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean...” Completely baffled with you behavior, you were deeply ashamed, unable to look the guy in the eyes and wanting nothing but fall into the earth.

“Ah, I got it. It’s Steve, isn’t it?” All of a sudden, Peter let out an irritated sigh, rolling his eyes skywards and rubbing his neck. “Of course, who else would say such nonsense. Blackmail, really? Funny he didn’t call me a stalker or anything.”

“Listen, I didn’t mean it, I’m really-”

“It’s ok.” He closed the locker, slamming its door loudly and making you jump. “It’s not your fault. If I heard that from somebody, I’d be scared too.”

He spent a couple of seconds staring into the wall until he rubbed his neck again tiredly and huffed. It took him less than a minute to regain his composure, and you heard him murmuring, “What a freak.”

He didn't return to the corridor, heading to the sports hall for his PE class, instead moving to the bench in the locker room and motioning you to sit. Feeling terribly awkward, you hoped he wasn't going to do anything out of anger, even though he had every right to be upset at your stupid behavior.

"About what he said," Peter took a deep breath, "it's nothing like that. I don't dig up some nasty stuff in the web to blackmail people. I've never done it. The reason why Mr. I-am-better-than-you said that is because I've made him take me into his little bodyguard group when I heard him talking to Loki. You're nice, and I wanted to help. Of course, Steve started acting like I was some creep, so he refused, and I had to remind him that, technically, he had to report your issue to the administration, not play a hero. I said that if I go and tell the whole story to the dean, Steve's gonna be in trouble because he knew who thieves were and didn't report them."

It was a loud off your mind. Goodness. Rogers called this a blackmail? Really? Just because Peter pushed Steve into taking him into their group?

You were less and less sure Rogers was sane. You definitely had to be careful around him.

"I can't believe he called it a blackmail." You admitted quietly, and the guy sent you a tired smile. "Peter, I'm so, so sorry. It was so stupid of me."

"Nah, don't worry. I'd freak out too if I didn't know the whole story."

You knew your apologies weren't enough, but you hoped Peter didn't take it to heart - if you can take such an accusation easily, that is. Shit, shit, shit, why did you believe everything these guys were saying? You didn't even know them in the first place! Why on Earth did you go asking them their opinions on others if all of them were biased, and every guy could twist the truth the way he liked? You shouldn't have let their words affect you that much.

"Whatever. At least now you know what Rogers is like." Peter sent you a grim smile and got up, picking his bright yellow sackpack from the floor. "Shit, I gotta go if I don't wanna be late. Let's meet in a library later, alright?"

"O-of course." You hurriedly stood up and left the lockers room after him, turning to the library: your Lit class was cancelled, so you decided to go study right away. At this time, the library was usually full, and you felt safe there.

Your thoughts were all about the guys again even when you were staring at your laptop, trying to focus on Excel numbers. Why did you feel like the atmosphere between them was so dense? If they were at such terms with each other, why did they group together to help you? What, because all of them loved you so much? It was ridiculous. There was something else to it, and you didn't know. You had a feeling no one was going to tell you the truth until you figured it all out by yourself.

Weird. It was all so weird. Steve's plan, their behavior, the relationships between them, and your nagging feeling they all were hiding something. Was it them who were actually following you?

The thought scared you to the point you started shivering. Oh shit.

"Hi there," the guy appeared behind your back so suddenly you almost jumped, looking at him wide-eyed, "sorry, did I startle you?"

"H-hi Jake! No, it's ok, I was just... studying." Both of you were talking in hushed voices, knowing the librarian would kick you out immediately if she heard some noise. "How are you?"

"I'm great, how're you?" You could hear concern in his voice: he was one of Thor's friends you met yesterday, and although you spoke briefly, Thor definitely told him more about you. "You look a bit worried."

"Oh, it's Math, I didn't really understand the topic, and we're having an exam on Monday... guess I'll be studying the whole weekend." You gave him your best smile to reassure you were totally ok, and the guy relaxed a little, smiling at you, too.

"I'm sure you'll pass. Thor said you're very smart."

What, he said that to all of them? Was he simply boasting about his girlfriend to his friends or was there something more to it?

"You're too kind. Thank you."

His smile grew wider, and he landed on the next seat to yours, resting his hands on the table. Apparently, there was something he wanted to talk to you about, and you grew uneasy.

"Listen, about these incidents... Thor told us all about it, so if you see any freaks following you around, you can message any of us, and we'll come right away." Looking at his serious expression, his bushy brows furrowed, you hoped he eas being sincere with you: you had enough with people you could no longer trust. "And also... that kid, if he's giving you troubles or anything, just let me know, and I'll tell him to keep his hands to himself"

Oh, he was talking about Peter, wasn't he? He had probably seen that silly photo. Wow, you though, Peter was totally right about Instagram: it was the best news source in the academy.

Thanking him for his concern, you laughed a little, convincing him there was nothing serious except for the theft and promising to tell him if anything weird would be going on. While it should have made you feel safer, in fact, you only grew more frustrated with this situation. You wanted to forget about these freaks and just spend you day like any normal student would, but everywhere you went people were staring at you as if you had a horn; one boyfriend or the other was always close to protect you from some unknown danger, and although you believed they tried to help, you hated the feeling they were hiding something from you. Why did you have to be going through all this? Wasn't it really better to drop off school, spend a year working and then apply to a better place?

Thinking of the faces your parents would make once you returned home, you realized it wasn't. This school with all those creeps wasn't worse than home that never felt like a safe place you wanted to come back to. Besides, all money you saved up until now were only good for buying food and things like that: you'd never afford to rent a decent place unless you found a well-paid job. It meant staying with your parents, and it wouldn't be much better than here, just different. If you wanted to drop off, you had to find a good place to stay.

Well, you could at least try, right?

When Peter met you in the library, the two of you no longer talked about anything important, simply studying together to prepare for the exams next week. It didn't feel off: from time to time you met his gaze, and the both of you smiled. You were thankful he didn’t talk about Steve or other guys or that weirdo in the lockers room.

Once you returned home, you went straight to bed, completely exhausted. Luckily, you did much more than yesterday, so you could rest now, but then you thought of Thor kissing you and bit down the pillow, angry at yourself. Why did you keep thinking of him right now?

______________

When you woke up the next morning, you felt like something was off: your body ached, your throat hurt, and your headache was only making it worse. Dammit, you caught a cold, probably. And that’s when it was finally the day to meet Steve, the guy you thought was a mastermind behind all these manipulations that were making you sick to the core. 

Anyway, it’s not like a mere cold would prevent you from doing everything you had planned. You left your bed and went to the bathroom, moving the dresser before again. 

Honestly, it felt terrible. It was definitely because of that flimsy dress you wore to school yesterday when the weather was becoming chilly. Argh. Watching your puffy eyes and swollen nose, you sneezed. Today you had to apply way more makeup to look decently.

Steve showed up earlier than either Thor or Peter: you had to skip your breakfast, hoping to buy something cheap in the cafeteria.

“Good morning.” He said with his everyday polite expression that soon shifted into a concerned one. “Are you alright?”

What, was it that bad? You did your absolute best to apply enough makeup and do your hair. Did you still look so sick?

“Good morning. Yes, I’m ok, just feeling a little sleepy.” You yawned on purpose, covering your mouth with your hand, and Steve’s face softened.

“Did you study all night?”

“Yep, exams are driving me a little crazy.”

“I understand. I also stayed late last night.”

Of course, the student council president studying all days long to be number one student in the academy. If you didn’t know of his twisted nature, you’d think he was the most typical nerd.

You spent most of the time either in silence or talking about studies, the academy, and everything related to it. Steve acted like a gentleman and a scholar, albeit a little too demonstratively. Walking with you as if he were a king of the place, he constantly replied to greetings of others, waved to his acquaintances and smiled. You felt so off you wanted to find Loki and walk with him: unlike Steve, he was considered unpleasant by the prevailing majority of students.

“Are you sure you’re going to be alright?” America golden boy asked you for the last time, and you forced yourself to smile.

“Of course. Thanks for coming, see you later, Steve.”

As he finally left you in peace, you almost fell down into your chair, your fever only getting worse despite the fact you took some painkillers. It was going to be a long day.

_________

Tags: @finleyjayne @alexakeyloveloki   ​@helenaeisenhower @villanellevi @hurricanerin ​@inlovewiththefictionalcharacters @chris-evans-indian-fanfic @navegandoaciegas @rosalynshields @brattycherub @sllooney @angrythingstarlight @lookiamtrying @buckysbunny @stargazingfangirl18 @dillybuggg @literate-lamb @cosicas-cuquis @sarge-barnes-sir @buckybarnesplumwhore @jaysayey @megzdoodle @gotnofucks @lux-ravenwolf @ximebebx @jeremyrennerfanxxxx123 @sourpatchspinster @biiskuitx @stupendouslovegardener @iheartsebandchris @lovelydarkdaydream @soleil-dor @illyrianprincess @vampirestrawberries @goodgodimaweirdperson @frontmanash @freya-heya @yandematic @mariatietacapitu @d3monslust @maybesandohnos @ibeatuptwinks @mangobangi @nectav @whatever-happened-to-the-ducks

[sambvcks]

crawl home to her, b.b. x reader

chapter one // body’s working on empty

summary: bucky isn’t as receptive to this new life of his as everyone had hoped. he’s cold, sharp-tongued, and closed off. except to the tenant across the hallway from him, who always wears pajamas and bakes a dozen too many of his favorite cookies

warnings: food, nothing too bad this chapter!

word count: 1.5k-ish

author’s note: i thought my marvel phase ended five years ago...here we are again. i haven’t written in awhile so please be kind! title and chapter titles taken from hozier’s ‘work song’.

[ read on ao3 | series masterlist | inbox | join my taglist! ]

[ NEXT ]

Five minutes into their first session, Bucky decided he was going to make Dr. Raynor’s job as difficult as he possibly could.

It wouldn’t be an impossible task, seeing how this whole ordeal depended on him opening up and talking, two things that he had abandoned decades ago. Her unwavering stare was nothing more than a challenge, these fifty-minute sessions once a week were nothing more than a slight inconvenience to his lackluster day to day routine. He would play along, do whatever exercises she asked, and feign stability until he never had to see her again.

“Since this is our first session together, we’ll take it easy.” She promised with a forced upturn of her lips before whipping out her notebook.

Suddenly, it felt like he was encased in bulletproof glass in Berlin again. He remembered that the last time he had been forced into receiving psychiatric help, it hadn’t exactly gone to plan. His chin fell to his chest, hands wringing together as he thought of any excuse to request a different doctor. 

“Let’s begin.”

It was already getting too hot to wear leather gloves and his heavy jacket. New York’s heatwave was supposed to be the highest on record this year and while kids popped open fire hydrants in the street, Bucky would be settled on the hardwood floor in the back corner of his apartment, waiting.

Waiting for what, he wasn’t quite sure.

It was a fairly nice apartment, newly renovated and practically barren. Government issued and funded, of course, and he had spent the first night pulling the furniture from the walls to the center of the room in search of bugs and cameras. He found thirty-four, destroyed them under a rolling pin, and they hadn’t come to replace them. Message received.

The one thing he really liked about the apartment building were his neighbors. The price tag for a one bedroom was substantial to say the least and only older couples could really afford it. No children, no dogs, no outsiders. The only break from his undisturbed routine would be occasionally helping Mrs. Johnson down the hall carry her groceries as she struggled to get the door unlocked with her brittle hands.

They affectionately called him James and the older women were quick to get a hold of his arms, saying things like “They don’t make them like you anymore, James!”. He swallowed the bile prickling at the back of his throat as he nodded, and they moved on to telling him about their single granddaughters.

It was almost nice, his routine. Almost.

Outside of those small encounters, he spent most of his waking hours jogging in the park and cooking the same three meals. He had his appointment every Wednesday with Dr. Raynor, but that was it. He’d take two trains back to his apartment and wouldn’t emerge again until he needed groceries two days later.

It was when he was returning from one of his biweekly grocery trips, a paper bag settled on his hips, that he spotted you outside his door.

He stilled in the hallway, taking a quick step back to peek around the corner without being spotted. His breath stalled, his ears picking up your soft humming and the crinkle of plastic as you set a bundle of cookies at his doorstep, the only one without a mat. His eyes flicked to the other doors, where identical bags of cookies sat propped up, tied with blood red ribbons.

His shoulders relaxed. No threat.

The bottom of his grocery bag suddenly gave way, fruit rolling in every direction. Bucky fell to his knees, glove clad hands snatching up everything he could reach as quickly as he could manage. You were faster, though, and scooped up a plum that had rolled your way, offering it over as he tried to balance the rest of his groceries in his arms.

“Thanks.” He was quick to sweep past you, hand digging in his pockets for his key.

“James, right? Ms. Robinson downstairs is like, in love with you.”

“Yeah, but, uh-“ Dr. Raynor’s instructions from their last session rang in his head, as much as he tried to tune her out: make connections. “You can call me Bucky.” He cleared his throat. “And Mrs. Robinson is far too good for me.”

“Bucky it is then.” You trailed him down the hallway, “Y/N.”

Bucky tried to sneak a glance at you from the corner of his eyes, which was harder to inconspicuously do now that he had gotten a haircut and couldn’t hide his wandering eyes behind long tresses. Young was Bucky’s first thought. much younger than the other renters in the building. Bright was next, followed by much too smiley for a Tuesday morning.

Pretty, he admitted as he turned his back to unlock his door. Maybe in another life he would have lingered in the hall, his so-called effortless charm seeping through as you swooned at the very thought of a date with James Buchanan Barnes. But that life was long gone, and instead he rushed to retreat.

“Oh, don’t forget these.” You swooped down to collect the bundle of cookies you had left at his door, handing them to the hand that wasn’t delicately balancing the pile of groceries he still held against his impossibly broad shoulders. “Oatmeal raisin, super-secret family recipe.”

He was back in the doorway of his ma’s kitchen, watching his little sister balance on a wobbling stool as she struggled to crack and egg with her little fingers. He can so distinctly see the pale green of the cabinets, remember the fight his parents had when she begged for that shade of green while his dad had wanted white. Of course, she won.

“These are your brother’s favorite.” His ma whispered to his sister; her flour covered hands reaching for the age faded index card with their grandmother’s script detailing the ingredients. “Our family’s recipe. One day, you will make these for your children. And your children’s children.”

Rebecca, still so young and with a hatred for smelly boys deep in her bones, giggled at the mere thought as her fingers fished out the bits of eggshell that snuck their way into the bowl. She wiped it away on the spare apron tied twice around her waist, much too big for her. 

Bucky would never see her grow into it. He would be drafted only a few months later.

In the meantime, he would bundle half a dozen of them in a tea towel and split them with Steve on the walk to the movie theater. Steve would begrudgingly admit that Buck’s ma made the best cookies, but his made the best brisket. They’d sneak in through the back door and do it all again the next weekend, until they ran out of weekends together.

“Oatmeal raisin are my favorite.” He admitted, accepting your offering like a stray cat does to the first scrap of food from a stranger.

“I think you’re the only person under the age on one hundred to ever say that.” You teased, backing away to the door adjacent to his, “Anyway, don’t tell me things like that. I’m a stress baker and with finals coming up…” You winced at the image of the dozens of batches you would surely be whipping up in the coming weeks.

“Finals?”

“Law school, one semester left.” You fished your own keys from your back pocket. Bucky barely held in the scoff at the shiny Spider-Man keychain that dangled from your fingers. “You?”

“Oh, no. I haven’t been in school in what feels like…a century.”

“Well, I’m all alone here and as much as I would love to, I can’t eat everything that I bake. So, expect a few dozen muffins and cookies every few days.”

“No arguing from me, doll.”

You both lingered in the small hallway, only a few steps apart, each leaning against your respective doors. Keys in each hand, with no intention of using them any time soon.

“Law school, you said? How do you afford a place like this?” Bucky was sure he was the only recently pardoned fugitive under this room.

“Well, this used to be my grandma’s apartment and it was handed down to me in a maybe no so legal way. If the landlord asks, I’m an eighty-year-old woman who doesn’t know how to work her answering machine.”

He huffed a laugh, mostly because that wasn’t particularly far from how he felt with today’s tech. The flip phone that Dr. Raynor had described as archaic sat heavy in his back pocket with only three names programed into his contacts. Don’t get him started on his television.

“Nice to meet you, Bucky.”

With that, you each stepping into your respective apartments. Bucky stalled at his door for a moment, listening as you locked and dead bolted your door behind you. He sighed, dumping his half-ruined groceries on his barren kitchen island.

The next day, he’d have another appointment with Dr. Raynor. This time when he’d say I’m trying, as he did each week, it wouldn’t be a complete lie. His phone buzzed in his back pocket.

2 New Messages

From: Sam

You coming up this weekend?

Don’t ignore me this time. He’s getting worse, Buck.

[ceruleanchillin]

5 Day Stay

| Or, Angel down bad for a week |

Angel x F!Reader

Warnings: language, infidelity, Angst (?), lil bit chili spice at the end

Mon:

Angel felt he was too young to consistently feel so bone-tired, yet that’s how his day had been ending for weeks now. Sometimes it was all he could do to get off his bike and make it to the door, only to have to rest his head against it to prepare to make it to the couch and collapse.

Tonight was one of those nights, and he wanted to be dead to the world until it dragged him back into it.

It was the smell of mixed spices that hit him first. It felt like he was in suspended animation, and slowly being released as different things started to register to him.

His TV was on, someone was rummaging through his kitchen, and music played faintly from his desk. Thinking back to the last time an unwanted guest was in his kitchen, he placed a hand on the holstered knife fastened to his back.

The fridge door closed, and you appeared in the window, eyes focused intently on whatever you were cooking on the stove.

He exhaled, feeling like complete shit. It only spoke to how weary his mind was that he could forget you were staying with him for the next week. Especially after the conversation that led to it.

“I don’t know Angel…really I can afford a motel for a few days.”

“Here? Rusted-through pipes will be the last thing your landlord is worried about when you bring back bedbugs and shit.”

Your eyes had widened at that, but still you brought up the thing that had been chained to your hesitation. “I mean….do you think it’s ok to do this? After we…Nails..Ang-“

He remembered a flash of irritation, more so at himself than you, when you said that. “Yes querida, fuck. If you’re so scared, I most likely won’t even be there the way things are going. Nails is out of town til’ next weekend…”

“Relax Ignacio.” you had cut your eyes at him, and he’d felt his dick jump like it did whenever you gave him attitude. “I’m just not trying to be a problem.”

Your voice calling his name brought him to the present. He caught the last part of your statement, that you didn’t know he’d be back.

“Yeah, we got in earlier than expected.”

“While you’re standing there like a weirdo, let me shame you real quick. How does a man in his thirties still have the kitchen of a frat boy?” You leaned on the sill of the divider. “You’re lucky I already knew you were sad in the kitchen. I had to bring my own tagine.”

He stepped into the kitchen, his stomach coming alive with interest. “One, I don’t know what that is, two, I can’t help it if the kitchen isn’t my preferred room of work.”

He peeked over your shoulder, but the unique pot kept him from seeing what you were making.

“Neither is the bedroom, unless that work is piling up dirty laundry.” you stuck your tongue out at him and turned back to your simmering dish.

“Ha ha. Dinner and a show, she does it all folks!” he collapsed at the table, the day catching back up with him. “Should put your ass on the club’s payroll. End the cashflow problem real quick.”

You turned to him, concern etched on your face. “I heard from Hank about that…sorry. I know now isn’t a great time for that at all.”

Things got awkward like they always did when you referenced the recent changes of his life. He wasn’t sad about getting another chance at fatherhood, this one more tangible than the last. However, he wasn’t entirely sold on everything he’d accepted along with it, and he was pretty sure you at least suspected that. It threw the previously comfortable confusion that was your relationship off track when it was touched on.

“No, it’s not.” was all he could manage.

It was quiet for a beat, the simmering of the food and quiet Neo Soul the only sounds.

“Well,” you started, turning off the burner. “At least you don’t have to eat like a ‘we got food at the house’ meme for once.”

He laughed, a genuine and needed laugh. “Ok, you know what? Keep talking about my pantry stocking skills, and I might take it personally.”

The rest of his night went that way. Anytime you and Angel got together, things were just…easy…better. You spent the evening eating in front of the TV (Angel getting all the way to thirds for what turned out to be olive chicken and roasted potatoes), trading jokes, and going over the finer points of Golden Girls. Angel learned you took it very seriously, and mocked you for being “old”.

It wasn’t until you were nodding off, and he was left with his own thoughts, that he realized he hadn’t enjoyed coming home this much since he moved in.

Tues:

Angel had dreamed he’d been back in his childhood home, but as a grown man. There was music coming from his parent’s room, and when he got to the doorway, his mom was at her dressing table. She hummed along to the soulful seventies music and smiled at him from the mirror. She said something, but he couldn’t make it out, and woke up in the frustration.

He jerked up from his position on his stomach, and slowly came to. With a grunt he wiped his hand down his face, glancing at his phone to find it was six in the afternoon.

It then occurred to him the music wasn’t just in his dream, it was coming from his bathroom. He got off the couch and followed the sound.

“Hey coma head.” you grinned at him from where you were doing your makeup.

He shook his head, trying to let go of the last vestiges of the dream, and how eerie the scene before him was.

He focused instead on the nightmare of products and alien looking tools surrounding you.

He kind of liked the mess, even if he couldn’t see the counter anymore.

“Hey hurricane Ulta.”

You made a face that was a cross between being amused and suspicious. “You sleep in your jeans and buy your shirts in pack form. Don’t act like you know what that is.”

He made a face of mock offense. “That’s so classist.”

This time you paused completely in you what you were doing and twisted your body to meet him. “Uh oh…let me find out you’re actually learning something from EZ.”

“Angel Reyes can know something about something, damn.”

You laughed, lowering your hands from where you’d been lining your eyes to avoid a mistake. “I’m only teasing you Angel Reyes.”

“Looks like you plan on teasing more than me. Some clown is gonna get his hopes and tiny dick up for nothing.”

“There’s this new club in the city that Belinda’s getting us into. It’s bad luck to buy your own drinks on the first night at a new place.” you adjusted the bodycon mini-dress for emphasis. “You doing anything?”

“Club shit.” he started picking through the products, sniffing them every so often. “Then I think I’ve got a call with Nails at some point.”

“You think?” you popped his hands when he got too close to the good stuff, or the things you were using currently.

“Yeah..I think.” he shrugged, only realizing how short he sounded when you winced.

He didn’t know why he got so annoyed when she was brought up around you. He wasn’t like that with anyone else, and he knew you were only trying to support his incoming changes.

“Ok..”

Awkward silence settled in before he found the words to break it.

“Why do you wanna know? You want me to be that clown?”

“Never.” you pinched his cheek, tone pure saccharine jest.

He muttered in Spanish, stepping around you to the toilet.

“Angel!” you exclaimed.

“What?! It’s my bathroom, I have to piss.”

“You better never make me angry Reyes, I could end your whole Casanova game with ease."

Wed:

“You holding on a little tight there mami!” Angel called over his shoulder with a laugh. “You said go fast."

“Shut up!” you giggled, but he wasn’t lying.

You’d asked Angel to take you to work on his bike since even though you spent so much time with bikers, you hardly got to ride one. You were going to the same place anyways. He had been all too happy to shake up his commute, but your speed challenge took it over the top.

He didn’t know how you were up so early, he personally felt like the bags under his eyes were like a PEZ dispenser. You’d gotten in at two am, and still got up with him at eight.

He loved watching you in the morning, you managed to be cheerful without being obnoxious, and it worked better than coffee for him.

He loved how much he was learning about you.

As he pulled onto the street beside the cafe you’d asked him to stop at, he felt your arms uncoil from around him. He may have pretended to shift just to make you pause and hold him a few seconds longer, but he wasn’t going to acknowledge that.

“I didn’t scream, and I’m not shaking, so you still have to buy my breakfast.” You unclipped your helmet, grinning the whole time.

You looked so pretty to him, with the sun hitting your eyes and hair just right. He could catch you at just the right moment, and you’d look so gorgeous, he struggled to believe you were real.

He cleared his throat, afraid his voice would crack if he didn’t. “Fair enough, come break my pockets then.”

You laughed, squeezing his chin and pointing out his pout. “You don’t even have to tell me once sir, I know my worth.”

Once inside, he trailed after you to the counter, using your head like an arm rest when you reached it. “That’s good.”

“Boy!” You swatted his hand away, and it was his turn to laugh at your adorable pout.

“New bet,” he stepped around you while the customer ahead of you wrapped up. “If I get your entire order just right, you buy lunch.”

“Deal.” you leaned on the counter, eyebrow raised at him in challenge.

Angel knew the best part of his day would be watching your expression go from smug to shocked out of the corner of his eye. He nailed every pastry, the iced coffee, and their preparation with ease.

The simultaneously impressed and amused barista looked to you for confirmation. She got a shocked nod in response.

“I know my worth too mama, so don’t skimp on lunch.”

“Fair enough.” You shook off your shock as you repeated his earlier words and shrugged. “Can’t complain I guess. I trained my work husband too well.”

He scoffed loudly, and the two of you went back to swapping smart ass barbs while he tried to ignore the lingering dip his stomach did when referred to him as “husband”.

Thurs:

Angel was a grown man, with years of grown man experience, yet he was sitting on the edge of his bed feeling like a teenager again.

The end of your stay was nearing, and every time he thought about you going back home, he felt weird. He was pretty sure that’s why he’d been a little snappy and annoyed easily at the club the past couple days. He just wasn’t ready to delve into that too much.

Regardless, he had to admit you had some growing effect over him. All morning, while he should’ve been resting and preparing for a charter visit, he was fighting off hard-ons thanks to you.

“Can I borrow your kitchen for the day Angel?” He mimicked your voice in a nasally mocking tone. “I’ll save you some when I’m done baking.”

He’d thought nothing of it when you asked the night before. Really didn’t even feel like you had to at that point.

He realized why when he saw that the desserts you were making for your friend’s brunch were elaborate as hell. The effort took all your attention, and unfortunately for him, his too.

You were baking a lot more than dessert and didn’t even know it.

Now he was hiding in his room, fighting off arousal he knew wasn’t appropriate. You weren’t his and he wasn’t yours.

That didn’t change the fact that you in a short silk lounge set, singing in French (how the hell did you know French?), doing domestic things in his home, did it for him.

He ran a hand over his hair, still damp from his cold shower, and forced himself to finish getting dressed. He had to be ready to face a room of dangerous bikers and prove his patched in worth. He couldn’t be thinking of weird little fantasies and parallels to his parent’s marriage.

He must’ve zoned out again, because you startled him enough to almost make him hit his wardrobe.

“Oh my god Angel try this! I think I did magic.” You excitedly thrust a red cookie his way.

Angel took the offered treat, and found it was a red velvet cookie. “It’s fucking good mi dulce.”

“Really?” You looked so hopeful, so beautiful, that he would’ve lied if the situation called for it.

“Yes, but you know you kill it in the kitchen.” He turned away to put on the flannel he’d fished out.

Now you were in his personal space, smelling amazing, and all his senses were under attack. He couldn’t trust Angel jr. at the moment.

“Baking is different. It’s a whole thing for me...I go all in.”

“I noticed your little Broadway production in my kitchen.” He kneeled down, pretending to look for his shoes as something to do while you were there.

“Don’t shame me.” You pressed your foot into his back, gently pushing him. “It makes for better results.”

‘shit.’ He cursed mentally at the contact.

Luckily, he heard you turn to leave the room. “Oh, EZ said to tell you to hurry up or pick up your phone.”

He rose up once you were gone and checked his phone. Sure enough, he had several missed calls and texts from Gilly, Coco, and EZ. He cursed aloud this time and finished getting ready, determined not to get distracted again.

Of course, his boys having to physically come in and get him when he did just that destroyed that promise.

Fri:

It had come down to the last night of your stay with him, and what he thought was a favor to a good friend, turned out to be more for his benefit.

The hell with the club seemed so far away when he was home now, and he’d laughed more times that week than he had the previous few months total.

Tonight though… Tonight had him so in his head he didn’t know if he was coming or going.

You, sensing something was going on with him, had invited EZ and Felipe to dinner. He didn’t know how you got the latter to agree, his dad had never even been in his home before, but you did it. It went over a hell of a lot better than the last time they tried it too.

The missteps that reared their head when his family tried to talk to each other at length were mitigated by you. You were the perfect buffer, able to get them to engage with you and then each other.

He saw his family in an unfamiliar, but favorable light. His father was actually enjoying his time with him in his house. He knew that night wouldn’t have happened if not for you.

Now, as he distractedly dried the dishes you’d washed, listening to you hit all of the high notes in Loving You, it hit him.

‘She should be my wife’ the thought came so quick, and was so loud he almost jumped, confused if it came from him or someone else.

“Hey dishwasher-less!” you nudged him with your hip. “Move those hands.”

“Why can’t we be a thing?” he blurted.

You dropped the silverware you’d been washing, eyes wide and focused on him. “Um..excuse m-…what?”

He knew that wasn’t the most tactful way to introduce his thoughts to you, but it was his way. Fuck…he didn’t even understand them fully himself.

“You heard me querida,” he put the dish down on the counter, turning to you. “When I stayed with you that weekend that my head was all fucked up-“

“Angel.” your tone made it a warning, but he kept going. He was never afraid of a challenge.

“I was inside you so much that weekend I forgot that’s not how I came in this world. I can’t believe I’m saying it out loud, but I felt home cause I was with you-”

“Stop it!” you hit the sink, rattling the contents.

“Fuck that!” he shouted back, startling you both. He stayed silent for a moment before speaking in a calmer tone. “Fuck that. Why can’t we talk about it? Why couldn’t we talk about it then?”

You didn’t say anything, but he saw your chest heaving with adrenaline, and realized you were just as affected by the conversation as he was.

“You just decided it didn’t matter and put it in this space we can’t touch now. It’s all fucked up!”

“Because,” you hissed. “If you remember, it was all over that Adelita chick, and I don’t know what kind of hold she has or had over you, but it was deep.”

He cringed at that, and turned his attention to the light fixture over your head, unable to meet your heated gaze.

“Whatever feelings I have for you Angel, I put them away in a place where I can still be your friend and keep things in perspective.”

“Feelings you have for me?” he latched on to the lack of past tense, hopeful.

You inhaled sharply. “You are having a baby and just got engaged. What is wrong with you?”

“Nothing..I mean a lot, but nothing to do with this. I know-“

“I know,” you pushed away from the sink and reached up to cup his cheeks. “That you’re scared Angel. You’re scared, because you’re gonna take two steps you’ve never taken before at once, and you’re trying to sabotage it.”

He shook his head, taking your hands from his face and holding them tightly in his own. “No..mi dulce, no. I’ve been struggling with this all week, longer if I’m being honest. Tonight sealed it.”

You snorted humorlessly, looking around the kitchen as if something in the room would help you get through to him. “I cook you some big boy meals, and treat your speakers to some musical taste, and you’re ready for vows?”

“Don’t put this all on me. Tell me you don’t feel it. Right here and now, to my face.”

He watched your expression soften, and let you put one hand back on his face, your thumb gently stroking his cheek. “Ok, I can’t do that, but I also can’t just fall into a situation with you either.”

He scoffed and shook his head. “We both know we didn’t just fall into anything. We sat here and let it build and didn’t say shit, and now I have to. This week just made it too real not to.”

He placed his forehead to yours, his own hands cupping your face. “Please…”

He watched you have an internal battle by your changing features before you finally leaned into him. The moment you did, his lips were on yours.

He knew it was more than just a kiss a few seconds in. Everything he’d felt that the previous week was alive and confirmed between you too. He could feel you telling him you had moments like his own.

He palmed your thighs under your sundress before grasping them tightly and lifting you up. He placed you on the counter while you two separated for air. Your chests heaved in unison, and neither of you had to say you wanted the other touching you again before it happened.

He gripped your hair, tilting your head back for access to your neck. The smell of vanilla and cocoa butter surrounded him as he worked his mark all over your skin.

Your legs wrapped around his waist, and you pressed yourself against his jeans.

He hated he couldn’t feel the heat he knew was emitting from your core through the thick material of his jeans, and slid his other hand up your thigh to your panties.

Your entire body twitched when he ran his fingers over you through the thin cloth. It wasn’t just hot it was soaked.

“You need me that bad mami?” he pulled away from your neck, satisfied with his work, and beginning to work at his jeans.

“And quick.” you breathed into his ear, your tone and the sensation making him shudder.

The ache against his jeans didn’t need to be told twice to find its way into your heat. He slid your panties to side and pressed his thumb against you. You jumped, whimpering your need again, and he pulled your panties way from you.

You’d gotten them around one ankle before he was inside of you, and they were no longer your focus.

You clung to each other so tightly there’d be evidence on both of you.

In the quiet, he wondered if your mind was racing with the same thoughts that his was. What now? How do we get this again?

He pressed kisses to your cheek just as he started to move. You inhaled, your nails sliding down his back. Not quite catching the skin, but enough to set him on fire all the same.

He mapped out a rhythm by your whimpers and how you grasped at him until he crafted the right one.

This was the conversation he’d needed. Every thrust from him, every cry from you, every bit of give and take to heighten the other’s pleasure. The two of you were admitting that everything that was between you was deeper, realer than you’d wanted to admit. He loved you, and you loved him, and you were engraving that on one another.

The flirtation, the way you could be yourselves around each other, the heatless jabs. Good friends was always a ruse.

Your face was buried in his neck, and when he felt dampness he knew came from your tears, he hiked your legs higher, moving deeper.

You cried out so loudly it echoed in the kitchen, drowning out the soft crooning of an eighties songstress.

“I know baby, I feel it too.” his voice was choked by the threat of tears of his own.

He’d never been here before. Not with Adelita, not even close with Nails. He was terrified. Terrified for it to end because he never felt so good. Terrified for it to end because it might never happen again.

“Angel..” your voice sounded so small, but it was strong enough to anchor him back with you. “I’m close, I’m so close.”

“Let go,” he encouraged. “Let me have it querida.”

Your body seized up with your release, his name the only thing he caught in your unintelligible babble.

You clenched up repeatedly in the aftershocks, and that drug him over the edge with you, biting your shoulder.

His vision tunneled, pinpricks of pleasure traveling up and down his spine. Your hands smoothed up and down the area, and he realized it was because he was shuddering.

He gripped the counter for support, pulling back slowly. He was searching for a way to ask if he’d changed your mind, but the act hadn’t made words for his thoughts any easier to find.

It didn’t matter, before he could even speak you stopped him. Your eyes were glazed over with tears that had nothing to do with pleasure this time.

“That was all that I can give you Angel. It’s not right, none of this is, but it’s all I can give you.”

AN:

Am I the only one who wishes she had reference photos for their home/club layouts? Lol, it’s such a weird non-factor thing, but still. From memory, I’m pretty sure Angel only has one bedroom though.

No shade, no hate but this was partially inspired by how over Nails Angel looked when she was putting her back into it….🥴

I played with a few canon-timeline things + knocked the dust off my smut writing ability (I’m going under my humiliation rock now, no calls plz)

[jungshookz]

the need for speed(dating); pjm

➺ pairing; park jimin x reader

➺ genre; sfw!! fluff!! y/n’s a goofball!! jimin’s into that!! featuring sommelier!hobi but before he finds his y/n,.. and also bartender!tae!! 

➺ wordcount; 5.7k

➺ summary; hoseok tricks y/n into attending a speed-dating event and (unsurprisingly) it doesn’t go down so well... then things gets a little better, thanks to the handsome stranger sitting at the bar. 

➺ what to expect; “please tell me you didn’t lure me here with the prospect of spaghetti and meatballs just to get me to take part in a speed-dating event for sad, single people.”

                                        »»————-　♡　————-««

“oh my god, what’s the rush?!” you stumble over your feet as hoseok continues to drag you along with him, “seriously, you need to slow down because i’m going to twist an ankle if you make me walk any faster-”

“we’re late for our reservation because you couldn’t decide on what top to wear-” hoseok scoffs and picks up his pace, your eyes widening for a split second when you actually almost fall flat on your face

“hey, i just wanted to wear something nice because you said that the place we were going to was a nice place- if you didn’t raise the standards, then i wouldn’t have raised the standards either!”

“less talking, more walking!”

you’re really not sure what possessed hoseok to want to go to a fancy restaurant tonight

pizza hut’s doing this triple treat box thing for the holidays and you suggested getting that because you get three main courses in one big box

what’s not to like?!

you weren’t even aware that hoseok had made reservations until earlier today 

he just sprung it on you that you guys were eating at a restaurant and not at the apartment tonight anD he told you to dress up nicely because of some dress-code 

“is this the part where you tell me you’ve actually been in love with me this entire time?” you joke as the two of you approach the restaurant, your eyes immediately picking up the romantic lighting coming from inside, “need i remind you, our ‘let’s get married if we don’t find anyone’ deal expires when we turn thirty, and i’m definitely not-”

“i’m not confessing my undying love for you tonight, y/n-” hoseok rolls his eyes playfully, the two of you joining the queue, “i just wanted to eat something that wasn’t fast food for once, you know?”

“you’re telling me the pizza hut triple treat box didn’t sound one bit tempting?”

hoseok pauses 

“…we’ll do that next week.”

heh

“plus, uh, you said that you wanted spaghetti and meatballs or something, right? i looked up where to find the city’s best spaghetti and meatballs, and this place came up as one of the results!” hoseok chirps, though you’re barely paying attention to him because you’ve just taken notice of one of the signs sitting by the entrance

“hey, look at that-” you point to the wooden sign before snorting to yourself, “there’s a speed-dating event taking place here tonight. i can’t wait to watch sad, single people get nervous and twitchy while talking to other sad, single people. do you think if we asked nicely, they could move us to a table where we can eavesdrop on everyone’s conversations??”

“yeah, our table is… a lot closer to the event than you think.” hoseok mutters off to the side before shoving his hands into the pockets of his trousers

“what’s that supposed to mean?” you turn to look at him, your brows knitting together in suspicion when he avoids your gaze and starts whistling a happy little tune to himself

…

…

oh my god

“hoseok,” you clear your throat quietly, hoseok’s eyes widening in alert when he notices you take a tiny step away from him, “please tell me you didn’t lure me here with the prospect of spaghetti and meatballs just to get me to take part in a speed-dating event for sad, single people.”

“well, i…” hoseok swallows, his adam’s apple bobbing in his throat

he flashes you a sheepish smile to confirm your answer

NO

“do they- do they even have spaghetti and meatballs on the menu??” you gawk, taking several steps back so you can look up at the name of the restaurant

le petit paris

oh god

this whole thing was a set-up

everything is a lie!  

this place is french

“this place is FRENCH!” you gasp, bringing a hand up to your chest in shock at this outright betrayal, “you tricked me, you slimy-” you spin around on your heels to walk back to the car, “i’m going home! no, first i’m going to get the triple treat- actually, i can’t finish that all on my own so- i’m going home, and i’m going to order that fancy ham and cheese sandwich from that one deli-”

“the fancy ham and- that’s a croque monsieur, y/n, that’s french!” hoseok snaps, “will you get back here?? you can’t go home because i’m the one who drove us here-”

“i don’t care!” you exclaim, standing at the edge of the sidewalk before looking to see if there are any taxis nearby that you can wave down, “i’m going home!”

“oh, c’mon-” hoseok gives the rest of the strangers in line an apologetic smile before rushing over to grab you before you can make an escape, “will you relax and please just-”

“hoseok, i am not doing this- are you kidding me?? you know how i feel about dating-” 

“i know, i know!” hoseok waves his arms, “but- just- you haven’t been out on any dates since you and seokjin broke up a year and a half ago...”

you immediately clam up at the mention of seokjin and you feel your entire face flush

it’s true

you haven’t made any efforts to go out and meet new people since you split with seokjin (sure, it was a mutual breakup, but that didn’t mean it didn’t hurt any less when he came to pick up his box of belongings at your apartment)

“and every time i tried to set you up on a blind date, you said that you weren’t ready for that yet- which, by the way, is obviously totally understandable, but-”

“but what?! there shouldn’t be a but!” you cross your arms, “all i have to say is that i’m not ready, and that should be enough of a reason to not trick me like this-”

“you use the breakup as an excuse to get out of everything, y/n!” hoseok exasperates, “remember when i asked you if you wanted to come to one of my wine-tasting courses? do you remember what you said to me?”

(“oh, you know… i would love to watch you do you thing at your… super fancy wine and cheese tasting thing, but i… i’m still grieving over the breakup! i’m, like, still devastated. super devastated. i’m in a very sensitive state, so i don’t think it’d be a good idea for me to leave my apartment, like, at all-”)

“…touché.” you mutter, reaching up to scratch the back of your neck

for the record, you felt really bad about not going to support hoseok at his fancy sommelier thing as soon as you hung up but you made up for it by going to his next one!

“plus, you look really pretty tonight and it would be a complete and utter shame to let that go to waste!” hoseok gestures to your outfit, “your ass looks great in these jeans, your legs look great in these heels, your boobs look fantastic-”

“okay, i think i get the point-”

“and you know i love hanging out with you, but… sometimes i wanna go out on dates too, you know?” he sighs, his shoulders drooping a little, “like, we can’t spend every weekend together-”

“i know that!” you frown, “you can just tell me that you have a date and can’t hang out, don’t make it sound like i’m forcing you to spend time with me-”

“i know, but i would feel bad about leaving you at home while i’m out with a potential romantic partner-”

“okay, you know what?” you raise both your hands before shaking your head, “fine. i will… i will do this one thing for you. i’m just glad we’re doing it together! because it would be awful if i went in there alone-” 

the smile drops from your face when hoseok has the audacity to press his lips together and look away from you again

“oh my- are you serious?? you’re not even doing this?? a second ago you were talking about finding your potential romantic partner!” 

“sure, but i wanna find them organically!” hoseok shrugs before scrunching his nose, “plus, i think speed dating is tacky.”

“wha-” you gawk, immediately spinning back around, “well, in that case, the only way you’re getting me in that restaurant is if you drag my cold, dead body-”

                                           »»————-　♡　————-««

“okay, if you need me, i’ll be sitting, like, right over there where you can still see me so it’ll sort of feel like we’re in this together-“ hoseok smooths the name sticker onto your shirt before giving it a pat, “but i saw a warm goat cheese puff pastry thing on the menu and i’m going to be helping myself to a big ol’ serving of that-”

“i hate you.” you interrupt, staring at hoseok blankly

“oh, you don’t mean that…” he coos, reaching up to fix a couple strands of your hair, “you’ll see! you’re going to have so much fu-”

“i hate you. and the burgundy button-up that you’re wearing looks awful on you.”

hey!

you said this was your favourite shirt on him!!!

“okay, well-” hoseok looks down at his (beautiful) top before frowning, “now you’re just trying to hurt me-”

“please don’t make me do this.” you whisper, hoseok looking up to see your eyes beginning to water, “i really don’t think i can do this.”

oh boy 

hoseok stays silent for a second as he watches your eyes beginning to well up with moRe tears 

“hey- i know it’s scary, y/n. i know.” hoseok shushes, immediately pulling a handkerchief out from his pocket to dab away your tears, “i know that it’s intimidating to... you know, throw yourself back out there after not having done this for so long, but… you have to at least try, you know?” he pulls away and gives your shoulders a reassuring squeeze, “look- if you really, really don’t wanna do this, we can just enjoy a nice meal together at this super nice restaurant that we definitely can’t afford… but do you think you can at least give it a try? please?”

“i…” you trail off, turning to look over your shoulder at the group of other sad, single people

okay

well

you suppose it wouldn’t hurt to give it a try

it’s been a year and a half!!

and if you’re going to start somewherE, you might as well start at an event that’s dedicated to helping you find love

“fine.” you sniffle, looking down and adjusting the sleeves of your blouse, “but i saw truffle fries on the menu and you’re buying two orders of that for takeout-“

“deal!” hoseok chirps, spinning you around before gently nudging you towards the group of strangers, “remember to smile! and to not talk about seokjin! ooh, and to not make any weird jokes that could scare a potential suitor away!”

“go away, you’re being embarrassing-” you hiss quietly, stepping down to enter the… pit?

you’re not sure what to call this part of the restaurant

it’s the area where hosts usually ask customers to wait while they set up a table for them 

whatever this place is called, you’re just glad that there’s a bar here because you’re definitely going to need a boost of liquid courage

the lighting is nice and dim which is great because you’re pretty sure your eyeliner is already starting to smudge from almost bursting into tears a second ago

you stand awkwardly by the stairs as you take in the scene before you

…

you haven’t even been here ten seconds and you already want to leave

what makes things worse is the fact that this isn’t one of those regular speed dating ones where you’re set up with a person and then after the timer goes off you move to the next table

no

this is one of those free, go-with-the-flow speed dating events where you just go up to anyone you want and spark up a conversation and hopefully find someone who can match your energy

and since you came late, it seems as though everyone’s already found someone else to talk to

great!

you’re the only sad, single person in this room of sad, single, but paired-up people

you look back out to the main area of the restaurant to see hoseok chatting it up with one of the waitresses

she giggles as she shakes her head, writing something down on her notepad

it seems like he’s having a good time out there

…you hope he chokes on his goat cheese pastries.

okay

what you need to do is just go for it, you know?

like, don’t even think about anything

just go up to anyone and say hello, and then you’ll wing it from that point

you wipe your clammy hands down on the back of your jeans as you make your way towards the centre of the room, looking around for anyone… who isn’t… talking to anyone… else…

ah!

you reach up to pinch your own cheeks in an attempt to loosen up your face muscles before forcing a bright smile on your face

you can do this

easy peasy!

saying hello isn’t hard

“hilo!” you greet, tapping the guy on the shoulder to get his attention

oh

never mind

turns out saying hello brings some of its own challenges

“i mean- hi.” you clear your throat, already feeling heat trickling up your chest, “sorry. i didn’t know if i wanted to say hi or if i wanted to say hello, and i guess my brain kinda just jumbled the two together-”

“hello,” he cuts you off before offering you a stiff smile, “that’s alright. i was actually in the middle of a conversation, if you don’t mind-” he points to over his shoulder at the girl standing in front of him and your eyes widen in surprise

whoopsies

“oh, gosh! i- um, i’m so sorry!” you take a small step back before raising both your hands up, “i’m sorry, i didn’t see her over your broad shoulders, so- o-oh, that wasn’t- that wasn’t me hitting on you or anything, by the way, that was just, like- your broad shoulders were just a general observation-“ you chuckle, shooting him two finger guns, “okay, yeah. you guys can go ahead and… do your thang…” you press your lips together tightly when he turns back around, focusing his attention back on his date

alright

no problem!

it’s fine

“not embarrassing at all…” you murmur lowly as you step backwards, jolting when you accidentally bump into someone

!

you whip around quickly to apologize but you don’t get a chance to because suddenly there’s a champagne flute and a dirty plate being shoved into your hands

“wha-”

“a refill would be awesome,” the brunette smiles at you, “moët and chandon, please.”

“oh, i’m not a-”

“oh, of course!” she gasps, reaching into her purse and pulling out a dollar bill, “here you go…” she narrows her eyes as she looks at your name tag, “y/n! lovely service. you’re doing a great job, girlfriend. it’s hard workers like you who make up the backbone of our society.”

“thank… you?” you stand frozen in shock when she tucks the folded bill into the shoulder of your blouse

this blouse was $200 and apparently it makes you look like a server so that’s definitely money well-spent

but also, who in their right mind would think a restaurant server would be wearing a square-necked, puffy sleeved blouse as part of their uniform?!

and why would a waiter have the exact same name sticker as everyone else participating in this speed-dating event??

“excuse me… pardon me…” you mutter as you elbow your way through the crowd, holding the dish and the glass up a little higher so you don’t get any crumbs or anything on anyone’s clothes

“oh, could you take this for me, please?”

“and this, too!”

“no, i-” you stop in your tracks when a plate is stacked on top of the one you’re already holding and you fight back the urge to let out a speechless laugh, “okay, sure, i’ll even drive you people home at the end of the night-”

to be fair, when you’re holding a dish and a glass like that, it does kind of make you look like a waiter so you can’t really blame everyone for thinking that you’re here to serve them

by the time you make your way to the bar, you’re balancing five little plates in one hand and you have four champagne flute stems held upside down and pinched in between your fingers

you let out a huff as you set everything down in the sink behind the bar, being careful not to drop and break anything

you dust your hands off, looking out towards the restaurant to see hoseok happily picking at a charcuterie board while swirling a glass of wine in his other hand

that sick, twisted bastard

…and your blouse now has a splotch of creamy white sauce on it, which is just fantastic, isn’t it?

not only do you look like a waiter, now you look like a perverted waiter!

“oh, come on…” you groan quietly, grabbing a napkin and wetting it with your tongue before reaching down to rub at it, “i just had this dry-cleaned a couple of days ago…”

so far this has been a living nightmare

but at least you got a dollar out of it!

...she could’ve given you a more generous tip, but it is what it is. 

“i feel like scrubbing it just makes it worse, no?” you hear a voice a couple feet away from you and you look up while continuing to rub at the stain

“that’s true, but i feel like dabbing it gently really doesn’t-“ you choke over your own words when your brain finally catches up to your eyes

handsome

handsome handsome handsome handsome handsome

holy handsome

the stranger tilts his head slightly, the corners of his pretty mouth pulling up into a lopsided smile, “really doesn’t…?”

“does- doesn’t, um…” you look down at the stain on your blouse as you feel your brain working overtime to spit out an answer, “doesn’t… do the thing.”

“do the thing. hm. that’s a fair point.” he hums, bringing his glass up to his mouth for a sip

you feel your heart skip a beat when you take in his pretty side profile... from the smooth, straight slope of his nose... to his pink, pillowy lips

oh, wow 

maybe there’s still some hope that this event won’t turn out to be too bad 

you stand up a little straighter when it hits you that this is your chance

this is your chance to stop being a waiter and start being a fellow speed-dater!!

“what are you drinking?” you ask, sitting down on the stool next to him before folding your arms up on the counter, “i could use a drink.”

“a gimlet.”

“a- a giblet? like… from chicken?” you frown, looking at the contents of his glass, “you’re drinking chicken giblets??”

he chokes on his sip and sets his glass down quickly before reaching up to wipe at his mouth with a napkin, turning to look at you with a smile, “no, silly. not giblet. gimlet. it’s gin, simple syrup, and lime juice.”

yeah

that makes more sense

“oh-” you snort, bringing a hand up to cover your mouth a little, “sorry. i heard giblet. but a gimlet sounds really good.”

“can i get one for you?” he asks, already raising his hand to get the bartender’s attention

“that would be nice, yes.” quickly letting out a breath when he turns to talk to the bartender

so far, so good!

you didn’t weird him out with your gimlet-giblet thing, which is a good sign

you cross one leg over the other, pausing for a second before switching legs

you hate sitting on bar stools because you can never find a comfortable position on them…

at the end of the night you’re always left with one butt cheek on the stool and one hanging oFF the stool

you settle on crossing your right leg over your left, nodding to yourself before folding your hands over your lap

this is a natural looking position, right??

you just don’t want to look like a dumbass in front of the very attractive giblet man

“everything okay?”

you look up to see that he’s turned back to face you, one arm propped up on the counter with his jaw resting against his fist

“oh! yeah.” you wave him off, “sorry… i just haven’t done this in a long time, that’s all.”

“what? sitting on a bar stool?” he jokes, the sound of his giggle immediately giving you a spurt of newfound energy, “are you enjoying yourself so far?”

“me?” you purse your lips in thought before scrunching your nose, “eh. i don’t think so. everyone thought i was one of the waiters, so i haven’t been able to really spark up any conversations because i’ve been busy collecting dirty plates and empty glasses- which reminds me, i’m pretty sure there are like, three people waiting for me to bring them champagne…“ you trail off, turning to look over your shoulder to see if there are any angry customers glaring you down

“yeah, i saw…” the stranger chuckles, “for the record, you’re actually pretty good at balancing plates! i probably would’ve dropped them all.”

“the only thing that kept me from dropping them all was the reminder that i’d probably have to pay for the damage done.”

“very, very true! and the bill would’ve been sky-high because this place is pretty fancy.”

“i know!!” you gasp, “and you can tell it’s fancy because you can pay someone else to park your car for you. like- valets are just- you know. fancy.”

“fancy.” he mimics, his knee bumping against yours as he shifts in his stool, “so, do you go to speed-dating events often?”

“oh, no.” you pause to thank the bartender as he sets down your drink on a coaster, “this is actually the first time i’ve ever been to one of these things. i didn’t even wanna come here in the first place, but my friend forced me to because he thinks i should get back into the game or whatever considering i broke up with my boyfriend, like, a year and a half ago-”

don’t make any weird jokes! don’t talk about seokjin!

hoseok’s words from earlier tonight suddenly echo in your head and you feel your cheeks grow pink

your giblet joke was pretty weird

and you just mentioned your ex-boyfriend

two for two!

you quickly take a sip of your drink before you blurt anything else out

ooh!

this is actually pretty nice 

“the, uh, the gimlet is good!” you hum, “i like the lime.”

“mhm, it’s my favourite drink.” he smiles, reaching over to gently clink his glass against yours before taking his own sip, “so your friend forced you to come and you’re not having a good time? that’s pretty rough.”

“yeah, well...” you sigh, “speed-dating is just the worst, you know? like… okay, if the hosts had set this up, like, where you get five minutes to talk to someone and then when the timer goes off, you move to the next table-”

“oh, yeah-”

“yeah, exactly- if it was like that, it probably would’ve been better, because that way no one gets left out!” you scoff, “but this freestyle just-talk-to-whoever-you-want-to type speed-dating is frankly ineffective and totally stupid, in my opinion. whoever organised this thing probably had one too many gimlets while they were planning it out…” you giggle, shaking your head, “also, i feel like organising a speed-dating event during the holidays is a little sad, you know? like… well, it’s not as bad as hosting one on valentine’s day or something, but doing it during christmas seems a little awkward, and, like… taking advantage and leeching onto sad, single people.”

“i see where you’re coming from- you know, i was at a valentine’s day one earlier this year and i’m pretty sure most of the people there were just looking to bone each other and not to make a real connection.”

“well, when you say it like that, it seems like speed-dating events are just a gateway drug into full-blown orgies-”

you bite back a grin when he chokes on his drink again before throwing his head back in laughter

wow!

this is going great!!!

you’re definitely going to have to thank hoseok if this thing with giblet man works out

of course, you should probably noT keep calling him giblet man if you want it to work out

his actual name is a crucial piece of information if you’re planning on asking him out on a proper date

“oh, by the way-” you clear your throat, “i never got your na-”

“hold on, before you say anything else, i just have to do something really quickly-” he holds his finger up to stop you before turning and getting up off the stool, your brows furrowing in confusion when he picks up the microphone sitting on the stool on the other side of him

huh

that’s a little weird

who brings a microphone to a speed-dating event?

bursting into song while everyone’s trying to have conversations with each other seems like a questionable thing to d-

“i hope everyone’s having a good time so far!” he announces, the music lowering a little bit as he continues to speak, “i just wanted to chime in and remind everyone to write down the names of whoever you’re interested in seeing again- there should be notepads and pens sitting on each of the tables…”

…

…

…

oh

oh no

oh dear GOD

you spin back around to face the bar, immediately slapping a hand over your mouth to suppress a scream of mortification when you realise that you just talked trash about the host of this event while talking to the host of the event

no wonder he didn’t have a name sticker!!! 

he didn’t even stop you! he just let you go on and on and on-

i need to get the hell out of here

you need to leave the crime scene immediately!!!!!

you down the rest of your drink before hopping off the stool, reaching up to rip your name sticker off and crumpling it up before tossing it to the side

of course 

of course this would happen to you!

out of all the people in the world, of course this would happen to you!

that’s it

you’re never going to do this again

in fact, you’re just never going to leave the apartment ever again

you’re just going to rot in your apartment and die alone, which sounds like a pretty good option to you

you should think about leaving the country while you’re at it 

you head straight for hoseok and you’re walking so quickly that your hair is practically whipping behind you

“hey! we’re leaving now-“ you hiss, grabbing hoseok’s arm and giving him a yank, “c’mon, up and at ‘em-”

“woah, woah-” hoseok smacks your hand away from him as he looks up at you incredulously, “what happened?? i just placed an order for your fries and they won’t be ready for a couple more minute-”

“screw the fries!” you duck down a little as you look towards the pit, “i just humiliated myself in front of a very attractive man and i would like to leave before i embarrass myself further-”

“well, what did you even do??” hoseok asks, scrambling to pull his credit card out of his wallet before raising an arm to flag a waiter down, “what happened??”

“oh my god, you don’t even wanna know-” you shake your head, “first, i went up to someone who was already talking to someone and i said hilo because i didn’t know if i wanted to say hi or hello and it came out as hilo- and, anyways, he basically ignored me so then i bumped into someone else and she thought i was one of the waiters which doesn’t even make any sense because i?? i’m not dressed like a waiter! i have a name sticker too!” you point to your chest before realising that you’d ripped it off a second ago, “well, i had one- okay, and then- and then this really cute guy started talking to me as i was wiping my shirt-”

“you stained your new blouse??” hoseok gawks, leaning back a little to inspect your shirt, “you just got it cleaned a couple of days ago!”

oh yeah

that’s a stain

...a very questionable looking stain-

“it was an accident-!” you groan quietly, “so, the cute guy- he started talking to me and we were having a really nice conversation- i slipped up a couple of times and made some weird jokes anD sort of brought up seokjin but-”

“oh my god, y/n-” hoseok mutters, pausing to take the chip reader from the waitress (in your panicked, rambley state, you don’t notice the way he winks at her and her girlish reaction to that)

“-somehow we started talking about speed-dating events and i just went into a rant about how tacky they are and how much i hate them a-and how much this one in particular sucked- and the next thing i know, he’s picking up a microphone and-”

“will you just get to the point?” hoseok gets up from his seat, pulling his jacket from the back of the chair

“i trash-talked the host in front of his own event!” you whine, feeling the urge to burst into tears for the second time tonight

“oh, jesus, okay-” hoseok laughs uncomfortably as the two of you hurry to get the hell out of here, “maybe you need to find someone organically too… and maybe we’ll avoid speed-dating for a while…”

“i told you we should’ve gone home!” you shiver as you step out into the cold, instinctively wrapping your arms tight around yourself

you decided not to bring a coat because you wanted to show off your pretty blouse but now you wish you’d brought one just to a) keep you warm AND b) hide your definitely-not-cum-stained waiter blouse

“this sucks! and i didn’t even get my truffle fries-!” you groan loudly, your voice dissipating into the air

“alright, shakespeare, take it down a notch-” hoseok reaches over to give you a pat on the back, “also, if you were willing to wait-”

“hey, hold on!” you stop in your tracks when you hear a familiar voice call out and you whip around to see the man you just embarrassed yourself in front of, “y/n!”

great!

and now he knows your name, too! 

“oh, god.” you turn back around, picking up your pace at the sight of hoseok’s car, “c’mon, let’s go-”

“you can’t just ignore him, he’s literally calling for you-!” hoseok grabs the back of your shoulders to stop you before turning you around, “i’m gonna wait in the car- and you better not mess up what looks to be a second chance-”

“hos-!” you don’t get a chance to turn and run after hoseok because the next thing you know-

“hey! you left your name sticker at the ball, cinderella.” mr. gimlet jogs up to you, unfurling his fist to reveal your sad, crumpled name-tag

“you came out just to bring me garbage?” you joke weakly, feeling completely drained from the events of tonight, “how romantic.”

“it’s, um, jimin, by the way.” he clears his throat, standing up straight, “that’s my name.”

“jimin.” you nod, testing the feel of his name coming out of your mouth 

jimin 

hm

you like it :-)

“i was going to tell you but when i turned around, you disappeared-” 

“well, yeah, because like-” you pause, “you’re not mad?”

“what?” he frowns, “why would i be mad?”

“because i… said all of that stuff?” you reach up to scratch the back of your head, “about… you know… stuff.”

“everyone’s entitled to their own opinion, y/n.” jimin smiles, offering you a boyish grin, “you’re a real goofball, you know that? you ran away because you thought i would be mad that you didn’t like the speed-dating event i was hosting?”

“yeah, i, uh… i full-on sprinted out of there…” you chuckle nervously, uncrumpling your name-sticker just so you have something to do with your hands, “ah, i’m sorry. i just- well, you know, i… haven’t really… done stuff like this in a while, so…”

“well,” jimin clears his throat, taking a step forward before plucking the sticker from your twitchy fingers, “you’re welcome to talk about how much you hate dates while we’re out on our date.”

“yeah, i- wait, o-our date?” you quickly look up at him before blinking owlishly, “are you- you want to take me out on a date?”

jimin smooths your sticker flat out on his palm before flipping it around to show you his number that he scribbled onto the back

he wants to take you out on a date?

...

jimin wants to take you out on a date!!!!!!!!

“of course i do!” he states as if it’s the most obvious thing in the entire world before handing the sticker back to you, “we can get wasted on giblets and you can help me plan out my next super-tacky speed-dating event.”

“oh, god-” you feel your face flush as you shake your head furiously, “i’m... so sorry...” 

“y/n, it’s fine-” jimin laughs, reaching over to hook a finger under your chin to get you to look up at him, “so... what do you say?” 

after everything that took place tonight you were sure you’d be leaving the restaurant with nothing but hoseok and two orders of truffle fries

but no!!!

here you are, being asked out by a very cute boy while his number sits right in the palm of your hand 

...this is what they’d call a christmas miracle, right?

christmas with cee 2020 masterlist

🎁what would you like from ceenta this year? 🎁

[streetlight11]

Neighbour's Fate

Summary: He was your neighbour growing up but he has always been distant. You didn't know for what reasons he chose not to mingle with you or your younger brother. It's been 6 years since you saw him. One day, you best friend asks for a favour from you that would eventually lead you to meeting his close friends. Who would've thought your old neighbour was now one of your best friend's close friends.

Theme: university au, old neighbours to lovers

Genre: fluff, a tad bit of jealousy, a little suggestive

Warning: mentions of anxiety, one or two curse words, very mild harassment (grabbing of wrist, that's all)

WC: 6.5k

Pairing: Seo Changbin x Fem!Reader

a/n: This was just a spur of the moment kind of idea I had the other day, and so this was the work I created... Hope you guys like it :)

Growing up, you lived beside the Seo family. They were a family of four and so were you. Their oldest child was a girl and her name was Seo Jiwoo. Their youngest child was a boy and his name was Seo Changbin. You were pretty close to the girl, to the point where you would always go to school together but the boy had always avoided you for unknown reasons.

He wouldn’t even play with your younger brother. It used to upset you but as you grew up, you realized that you can never force anyone to like someone or do something they didn’t want to do. And for that reason, you ended up letting him be.

However, despite not talking to you as much as his sister did, he was very attentive on small little things and he noticed that you tend to get anxiety attacks whenever you are in front of a huge crowd or the centre of attraction. And he knows this.

You had just entered senior year when you heard news from your parents that the Seo family were moving.

You were sad considering you’re already so close to Jiwoo. But you couldn’t force them to stay there anyways. You accepted the fact that you probably wouldn’t see them anytime soon, maybe not ever. You bid them goodbye, not forgetting to glance at Changbin one last time before they drove off with their boxes loaded into a van.

Two years passed since they moved and you were finally going to college.

You decided to move to Seoul alone and your parents allowed it. Your heart was heavy to leave them behind but they understood that you were doing it because you wanted to further your studies. For that, they willingly let you go.

After graduation, you enrolled yourself into a college with your favourite course, not forgetting to find an affordable apartment for yourself. And that was the start to a new chapter in your life.

4 years passed by in a flash and you had managed to further your studies by going to university. You were currently a Computer Science major in Hankuk University, together with your best friend whom you met in college and have been friends ever since. He was two years younger than you but he was pretty mature for his age, and his name is Hwang Hyunjin.

It was a bright Thursday morning and you were just strolling to your lecture class when someone swung their arm over your shoulder. Right when you were about to curse, the familiar voice warned you.

“Relax, stop being too defensive will you?”

You clicked your tongue at him, seeing him shake his head a little to get his long beautiful blonde bangs away from his eyes.

“Then announce who you are first before putting your arm around me next time, will you?” You scoffed, earning a roll of his eyes. “You’re unbelievable sometimes, you know that?” Hyunjin sighed.

“I appreciate that compliment.”

“Whatever…” Hyunjin could only laugh as the two of you continued to walk to class.

Hours went by, it was currently lunch hour. You made it to the cafeteria in time when there still weren’t many students yet. Hyunjin was walking beside you, telling you stories about his ex-girlfriend whom he caught cheating on him last month when you spotted an empty table a few rows down from you.

With that, you grabbed his shirt and began to drag him to the table before anyone else occupies it. A few minutes later, you were just munching on your smoked squid when someone came to give Hyunjin a handshake.

You looked up to see two guys whom you knew to be in Hyunjin’s dance crew team that represented the campus.

One of them had pretty freckles all over his face while the other one had a cute gummy smile with doe round eyes. They simply acknowledged you with a friendly smile and a nod before walking away.

You’ve never really met Hyunjin’s friends before properly because you were shy.

Even with those two guys, you knew they were part of Hyunjin’s close circle of friends that had other guys from other campuses but you’ve never met them before. You weren’t sure if you even wanted to, if they��re all just going to be as equally good looking as the two dancers from your campus.

A few days later, you were lounging in your living room on a Friday night watching your favourite TV show on Netflix. You were in nothing but panties and a big hoodie that you remembered to be Hyunjin’s but you stole it one night when you slept over at his place after he broke things off with his ex-girlfriend when he found her cheating on him with a friend of his but not from his circle.

You were just seated on your couch with a chocolate almond drink in your hand when you got a text from Hyunjin.

With that, he told you to pick him up at his apartment so that you could go meet his friends at the mall and discuss his plan. It sounds ridiculously dramatic to you but then again, it’s Hyunjin. Nothing’s ever not ridiculously dramatic when it comes to him.

You texted him you’ll pick him up at around 2, in which he said okay. You were scheming through your closet to see what you could wear. You didn’t want his friends to have a bad first impression on you so you opted to wear a little feminine. After rummaging your closet for a good few minutes, you ended up pulling out a baby blue off shoulder, floral print dress.

You’ve worn this out with Hyunjin before once but mostly with your girl friends. You kept your hair simple with a messy low bun, leaving your fringe to frame your face as it parts nicely in the centre.

Once it was time to pick him up, you left your apartment. Not forgetting to bring your purse along to keep your important belongings.

You wore your favourite white Nike air force 1s to pair it with your outfit.

After you’ve managed to pick him up from his apartment, he tells you which mall they promised to meet. The drive there was filled with him complaining to you saying his ex kept bothering him on kakao talk and also social media.

He said he’s had enough so he wants to get back at her to show her that he’s moved on. He told you that she invited him and his friends to her birthday party at her house next weekend.

So he wants to use this chance for his payback.

You simply listened to his plan as you focused on the road ahead of you. Once you’ve found yourself a parking space, you park your vehicle and leave.

He walked with you to the restaurant, all the while talking to you about your dreadful assignment. You arrived at the restaurant, only for a waiter to approach you two.

“Uhh, hi. My friends are here actually. Table reserved under Chan I think?” Hyunjin said as the waiter went ahead and checked the booking list, only for him to nod when his eyes met the name that was mentioned.

“Ah, yes. Right this way.” He led you deeper into the restaurant as you followed behind Hyunjin.

You were too busy focusing on the crying child across the room, not realizing you were already at the table until Hyunjin’s arms wrapped around your waist to stop you from walking. You whipped your head around to lock eyes with him as he chuckled at you for being clumsy.

Just then, you turned towards the table and you saw a whole table filled with really handsome guys. You also noticed that the two dancers from campus whom you recognized pretty well by now.

“Oh, hey!” The one with freckles said as he waved to you and so did the other one. You smiled shyly to them as you rested your right hand on your left elbow.

You schemed through the different pairs of eyes, smiling to them as a way of saying hello.

Just when you thought you were done, you didn’t notice the one who got blocked by Hyunjin’s tall and lean body. It wasn’t until Hyunjin turned around to call for the waiter, that you finally locked eyes with the individual seated at the edge of the bench.

He was absolutely breath-taking.

He was wearing a grey shirt that hugged his upper body a little too perfectly.

His muscles were in full view. His broad chest puffing out against the soft material of his shirt. The sleeves of his shirt doing the bare minimum in giving his muscular arms air to breath. His shirt tucked into his black cargo pants that had a chain attached to the belt hooks.

He wore a silver chain necklace as his accessory and a few chain bracelets as well. His hair was styled to show his forehead despite it not being slick back. However, his eyes were cold at first but the minute he looked at you, you could’ve sworn his eyes went wide for a split second before it softened.

Your smile slowly disappeared as Hyunjin spoke up to get your attention, “Noona? You okay? You look like you just saw a ghost.”

With that, he chuckled as he turned to his friends and continued talking, “Friends, this is my best friend since college, Y/N. Noona, these are my friends, Felix, Minho hyung, Seungmin, Jeongin, Jisung, Chan hyung and Changbin hyung.”

At the mention of that last name, a sudden rush of adrenaline flowed through your veins as you turned to look at the said individual. Letting his name roll off your tongue.

“Chang… bin?”

The table fell quiet as your eyes diverted from his to the plate in front of him. The boys didn’t miss the frown that soon appeared on your face.

“Do you know him?” Hyunjin asked, genuinely intrigued by your reaction.

Why is the name making your heart flutter?

Just then, you looked back into Changbin’s soft eyes only to ask, “Seo… Changbin?” You heard a few light gasps from the guys but they weren’t your main focus right now.

You watched as Changbin shifted in his seat, making him ask, “How did you know my name?”

His question made you confused.

Was he not your neighbour? Was he not the same Seo Changbin you used to grow up next to? Was he a different Seo Changbin?

This made you feel slightly embarrassed thinking you mistook him for someone else. So you apologized, “I… sorry, maybe I mistook you for someone else.” With that being said, he didn’t say anything else as Hyunjin brought you to the empty space beside Jisung and Seungmin. During lunch, Hyunjin explains what his plan was to everyone.

You listened to him as well, occasionally giving him scoffs or a click of your tongue if you felt that he might be a bit too sassy about the things he wanted to do.

After lunch was over, they wanted to walk around the mall for a bit so you followed.

You had all just entered the lift to go down to level 1 from level 6. There were a few strangers who came in as well. You were the last to enter after the boys while the other shoppers came rushing in behind you.

You had just turned around when a rowdy bunch of people pushed you in further. You were about to lose balance when you felt a firm hold on your waist. What you also felt was your upper back accidentally crashing into a firm chest. You were secretly hoping your guess was wrong but it wasn’t.

“It’s okay. I got you.” His raspy voice said quietly in your ear over the noisy lift, making you turn your head slightly.

That was your first mistake.

The minute you turned, his lips accidentally brushed against your cheek as it was now inches away from your own lips. You were caught off guard by the close proximity so you softly gasped and were going to pull away from him when you accidentally bumped into the person in front of you.

That was your second mistake.

Because the minute you slightly bumped into them, the person turned around to give you a disapproving look, making you apologize quietly as you felt the hands on your waist wrap itself around you and tugged you against him as a way to comfort you.

Changbin simply hid his smile against your hair on his left where his face was between your head and the lift walls so none of his friends saw this.

Your heart was pounding against your chest as you unconsciously rested your hands on top of his forearms. After the crowd left the lift at level 3, you could finally breathe as Changbin let go of you before his friends saw him hold you.

You went home that day feeling lost and confused.

Does that mean he knows you, that he was simply acting as if he doesn’t remember you? Why else would he act that way, unless he’s that type of guy who knows his way around girls?

As far as you remember, Hyunjin has never mentioned being friends with fuckboys and that he says that his friends were all very sweet and humble guys.

Either way, you decided not to think much of Changbin and just carry out Hyunjin’s favour and you’d call it done with being around his friends. But of course luck wasn’t on your side and that it always has it’s way of turning things around in your life. This time, it was with Hyunjin’s friends.

More specifically, Changbin.

The day finally came, you were going to be Hyunjin’s fake girlfriend for the night. You weren’t really nervous considering you don’t have any special feelings for him. You were more anxious that you will be seeing his friends tonight. And that means you’ll be seeing Changbin too.

Hyunjin came to pick you up this time, coming earlier to pick out the perfect outfit for you to wear so that his ex would feel jealous when he sees you with him.

Hyunjin ended up choosing a pink satin dress with quite a deep neckline that essentially shows your cleavage. You were against wearing it at first but Hyunjin insists on you wearing it.

“Dude, you do realise I might get guys staring at me the whole night if I wore this right?” You asked, your tone was serious as he knows how you feel about being a centre of attraction. It gives you major anxiety. With that being said, Hyunjin gave in and chose a different dress that was also satin but with a decent neck line and a thin strap to rest on your shoulders.

It hugs your figure perfectly, with the hem stopping right on your mid thighs.

Hyunjin gave you the privacy to change as he waited for you in your living room. After you were done, you came back out with your purse and heels from your shoe closet.

Hyunjin almost choked on his own spit as he scanned you from head to toe.

“Woah! You are looking hot as hell!” He praised you, earning a roll of your eyes. You slapped his chest with your purse, telling him to get up so you can both leave.

The drive to his ex’s house took about 40 minutes, filling the drive with singing your favourite songs with Hyunjin and just laughing about random things. His friends were going to meet you two there, hence the reason why you were now leaning against Hyunjin’s car door with him towering over you.

He trapped you by resting both hands on top of his car roof on either side of your body.

“So, let me make myself clear. You can hold my hand, hold my waist, kiss my cheek, wherever you want up here…” You said as you pointed from your shoulder to your face before continuing your speech, “But, not my lips.”

Hyunjin pouted as he got a gentle slap from you to his chest, making him chuckle.

“Okay, but what if she wants proof of us dating and she asks us to kiss?” He asked, making you think through your potential actions.

“Fine, only if she asks. If not, don’t even think about tricking me into kissing you.” You warned as he scoffed, telling you that you were ‘no fun’. You rolled your eyes at him but the smile on your lips betrayed you.

Right when you wanted to look away from him, instead you saw a group of guys walking up to you and Hyunjin. Only to realize it was his friends.

Your eyes just naturally travelled over to the one walking near the curb.

Changbin wore a black skinny cargo pants, a black button down formal shirt tucked in, leaving the first few buttons undone. It definitely was low enough to expose a slight amount of his chest. He accessorized with his favourite silver necklace and a chain bracelet with a watch. He had a pair of black combat boots on to go with his outfit.

His hair was styled nicely to partially show his forehead and his undercut. You would be lying if you said he didn’t look good. But you decided to keep the comment to yourself as Chan smirked at you and Hyunjin.

“Damn, you’re not even inside and you guys already started the act?” Hyunjin wriggled his eyebrows as he pushed himself off his car only to snake one arm around your waist and pulled you against his side gently.

“By the way, you look really pretty Y/N.” Chan smiled at you genuinely, making you feel shy. But nonetheless thanked him for his compliment.

The rest of them agreed to their friend’s comment as well, saying that you look good with this dress.

The 9 of you soon walked to the house as Hyunjin slid his hands into yours swiftly when you were reaching the door. However, Changbin couldn’t help but feel jealous when he saw this. Yes he knows it was all an act. Yes he knows that it was only for a day. But why did he wish that was him instead of Hyunjin?

You arrived at the house, only for Hyunjin’s ex to open the door. Her smile immediately dropped when she looked down at your locked fingers with Hyunjin.

“Hey, you guys made it… And, with a friend…” She said through her clenched teeth.

“Oh my goodness, where’s my manners? This is Y/N, my girlfriend. Baby, this is my... friend, Yuna.” Hyunjin said as he slid his arm around your waist, making you smile at the girl and proceeded to shake her hand.

She was clearly uncomfortable but she just pressed on a smile as she welcomed the 9 of you in.

The birthday party was definitely leaning more towards a party which includes alcohol and random hooking ups with strangers. But since some of them drove, they made sure not to drink, including yourself because you don’t drink alcohol.

It has been almost an hour since you reached here and there were already a whole bunch of drunk university students everywhere in this house.

You were just seated on the couch next to Hyunjin and Minho with some of the guys. The only ones who were tipsy amongst the 9 of you were Jisung, Jeongin, Felix and Seungmin. You were just leaning your head against Hyunjin’s shoulder, feeling tired from having been surrounded by drunk students when you felt the need to get a refill of your non alcoholic drink.

You rested your hand on Hyunjin’s lap to gain his attention, who was busy talking to the other four guys, as all four pairs of eyes soon turned to you. “I’m gonna get a refill. I’ll be back.” You said as you got up after receiving a nod from him.

A few minutes later, you were just walking back to where the guys were sitting when a warm hand on your waist made you jump.

You turned around to see a guy whom you didn’t recognize, smiling down at you drunkenly.

“Wanna dance, baby girl?” He slurred over his words, making you excuse yourself. But when you turned to walk, he gripped your wrist so tightly that it made you drop your cup to the floor. You winced as he began tugging you towards the stairs.

But then a firm grip around your waist made you stop walking as someone ripped his hand away from yours only to throw a solid punch to his jaw.

“Fucking touch her again and I’ll break your nose.” Hyunjin growled as the guy began to stumble away. This has caught the eyes of those around you, making your anxiety grow. You didn’t realize this but you began to shake, something you always did when your anxiety was kicking in.

You were about to panic when the soft voice behind you managed to calm you down.

“Hey? Hey, calm down. Breathe. It’s okay.” Changbin whispered in your ear. It confused you on how he seemed to know that this was due to your anxiety but your mind couldn’t properly function right now.

So when Changbin called Hyunjin and told him you were shaking, the minute he passed you over to Hyunjin who immediately hugged you, that’s when it hit you.

This Changbin knows about your anxiety.

You allowed yourself to calm down in Hyunjin’s arms as he caressed your back soothingly and it worked.

A few minutes later, you finally stopped shaking as he pulled away from you only to cup your face gently. “Are you okay?” He asked, genuinely concerned for you. All you could do was smile at him and thank him, in which he told you it was fine and that he should’ve been more alert when leaving you alone in this kind of atmosphere.

You were just walking back to where his three friends were sitting, when a familiar voice called Hyunjin’s name behind you. The pair turned around as Yuna came to a stop behind Hyunjin.

She awkwardly glanced at you before focusing back at him.

“Hey, I need to talk to you… in private?” Yuna said.

“Why? We can just speak here.” Hyunjin said.

“I want to talk about something important… it’s about… us.” She paused. Hyunjin sighed as he stared at her with nothing but lingering pain in his eyes.

“There’s nothing else to talk about Yuna. You cheated on me when I told you I loved you. Was I not enough for you?”

“I’m sorry Hyunjin… I… I wasn’t thinking. Please… can we talk in private?” She said desperately, making you glance up to him who had an obvious frown on his face. You knew he wanted to talk to her to clear things between them. But you could also see that he was already tired of her bullshit and that he wanted nothing but to move on from her.

So you opted to give them space by holding his forearm gently and told him, “I think there’s some things you guys need to settle. Go. I’ll wait with the guys.”

You flashed him and Yuna a smile as you let go of his hand, turning around to walk towards where Minho, Changbin and Chan were sitting. The three of them were already looking at your direction, seeing the situation unravel in front of their eyes.

Hyunjin was at a cross road as he wasn’t sure if he should follow his heart or mind.

After what felt like forever, he decided to follow his heart and that was to completely end ties with Yuna. With that being said, he turned back to her only to speak up.

“I’m sorry Yuna. But all of that was in the past. I’ve already moved on and you should too.” Hyunjin said as he then turned on his heels and left.

He re-joined you and the guys, where you were sitting on the arm rest beside Minho since the other end of the couch was already occupied by drunk couples. Hyunjin was just standing beside you when Yuna placed her hand on his shoulder and roughly turned him around.

“That’s it? It was just that one time. You can’t tell me you’ve moved on that fast.” She scoffed as he raised his eyebrows at her in disbelief.

“With what you did to me, it only makes sense for me to move on this fast. Besides, I’m already dating someone now. You’re too late.” Hyunjin taunts but it seems like Yuna had a different plan as she scoffed at you.

“As if. I’ve noticed you two acting quite distant when I’m not near you. Just tell me you guys are friends and leave. I don’t need fakers at my party.” Yuna said, her tone visibly angered.

Hyunjin smirks, knowing that she was just trying to bite his tail.

“What do I need to do then to prove to you that I’ve really moved on from you?”

“Kiss her. If you’re really dating her and you guys aren’t just friends, then kiss her.”

There it is.

That was probably the last thing you’d wanna hear tonight. Especially not in front of Changbin. With that being said, Hyunjin smirks as he accepted the challenge easily. Since you both agreed on this before you entered the house just now, you knew you couldn’t really say no to it.

“Oh, sure thing sweetheart.” Hyunjin said as he turned to you and immediately leaned down to kiss you on the lips, hands reaching up to cup your face.

You swiftly moved your lips against his to make it seem legit. You could feel Hyunjin’s lips curving into a smile against your lips as you heard Yuna scoff and soon stormed off. Hyunjin pulled back the minute she left, only to apologize to you.

“I’m really sorry noona…”

“It’s okay.” You smiled as Minho and Chan began to tease you two for executing the perfect kiss, saying that it looks too legit. They even mentioned saying you two looked like a nice couple.

In which you responded with a fake gag, earning a soft punch to your arm by Hyunjin himself. You giggled but you completely missed the way Changbin’s eyes were burning with jealousy from seeing you kiss Hyunjin.

He knows this was just an act but why was he so pressed by the simple kiss?

A few days later, you were in class when Hyunjin told you he was meeting his friends this weekend and asked if you wanted to join them. You weren’t sure if you wanted to but you decided to go along with it. He said they planned to watch a movie and maybe go to the pier. You nodded, agreeing to tag along since he offered you to come.

Weekend finally came and you had just left your apartment. You wore your denim skinny ripped jeans, a white cropped fitted tank top and a black oversized jacket.

Hyunjin told you he was going to pick you up so you met him at the roadside in front of your apartment building.

You both made it to the mall to queue for the movie tickets. Chan was queueing with Hyunjin so you were left with the others. You were just scrolling through your Instagram when someone fed you popcorn. You looked up to see Changbin holding two popped kernels in front of your lips. You unconsciously blushed as you opened your mouth to let him feed you.

Changbin chuckled after feeding you, only to pop some in his own mouth. You stood in between Changbin and Jeongin against the wall while Seungmin, Jisung, Felix and Minho were standing in front of you three.

They were just talking amongst themselves when you glanced over to the full bucket filled with caramel popcorn that Changbin was hugging.

He saw you looking so he took some out and held it up to your mouth.

“Ahh, it’s okay, I can take myself.” You said softly, gently pushing his hand away but instead, he said something that made your stomach churn in a good way.

“Don’t worry, I like feeding people.”

You stared at him for a second as he teasingly tapped the popcorns on your lips, making you giggle. Changbin fed you a few times, even after you’ve entered the cinema theatre. After the movie ended, all of you made your way to the pier.

Once there, you were walking past the game booths which had some very cute prizes. Just then, your eyes caught a glimpse of your favourite cartoon character as a prize for one of the booths.

It was Stitch.

You gasped as you eagerly reached out for whoever’s arm that was nearest to you, only to grab both Changbin’s and Seungmin’s forearms on either side of you before pointing to the booth with the Stitch soft toy.

“Guys look! It’s stitch! It’s so cute! Omg!” You giggled, hearing both of them chuckle as you jogged over to the booth. It was a game of shooting which you clearly weren’t good at. Just as you were pondering over the game, a familiar voice spoke up from behind you causing you to turn.

“One round please.” Changbin said as he handed the man his bill before the man gave him a loaded nerf gun.

“What are you doing?” You asked as Changbin simply smiled at you.

“Playing the game?”

“Of course I know that… but why?”

“For fun…” He smiled as he began to aim for the targets. He was getting the shots perfect so far. Barely missing any target. After a stressful close round, you watched as he won a prize. You didn’t know why but you thought he was going to choose something that was for himself.

But instead, the next thing you see was the man reaching up to grab the exact one that you’ve been eyeing all these while.

Changbin smiled as he thanked the man for the prize. But when he turned away from the man, you expected him to walk back to his friends. You didn’t expect him to give you the Stitch soft toy and then proceed to say innocently, “Take it.”

You raised your eyebrows at him softly, clearly taken aback by his offer.

“W-What?”

“It’s for you… You looked like you wanted it so bad.” Changbin chuckled as he gently took your hands and wrapped it around the toy to make you hug it.

“Changbin… thank you…” You whispered as he could only smile, guiding you back to where the guys were. The minute you came back to where some of them were, you excitedly showed off your prize.

“Jin ah! Look!” You exclaimed as Hyunjin gasped at the size of the soft toy.

“Woah! Where did you get this?”

“From that shooting booth! Isn’t he cute!”

“You won the shooting game?!” Hyunjin asked in shock, making you blush as you turned to Changbin. He had a soft smile on his face before he spoke up for you.

“I did. So I gave the prize to her.”

The guys began to tease as Changbin rolled his eyes thickly at them.

“Oh? Was that a gift to her?” Minho smirked.

“Never thought I’d see the day Seo Changbin goes out of his way to win a prize for a girl…” Jisung teased. Changbin simply brushed all their comments off as you all continued walking. You have been hugging the soft toy for the past hour wherever you went, earning soft laughs from the guys. Just then, Hyunjin wanted to take pictures at the pier.

Felix was helping to take Hyunjin’s pictures while Chan was helping to take Minho, Jisung, Seungmin and Jeongin’s picture.

You were just burying your face in the soft toy when Changbin’s voice softly spoke up from beside you, “Do you like it that much?” With that, you turned to him and a bright smile decorated your face, warming his heart even more.

“I’ve loved it since I was young! He’s so cute! Don’t you remember? I used to bring my small stuffed-” You were rambling excited until you stopped yourself when you realized what you were doing. “Oh! Sorry! Sorry… I got a little carried away there…” You apologized as you avoided his gaze but you missed the little smile growing on his face.

But what he said next made your heart stop for a split second, almost not believing your ears.

“I remember…” He whispered so softly, you could’ve missed it if you weren’t properly listening. You whipped your head around as you stared at him in shock.

“You… do?” Your voice was quiet as his eyes held the galaxy.

But your little moment gets cut when Felix calls you over to take a picture with Hyunjin who deliberately drags you away from Changbin. He could only smile as he nods at Hyunjin’s figure behind you, signalling you to just go follow him.

You frowned as you stood beside Hyunjin and proceeded to take a few memorable pictures with him. After everyone was almost done taking pictures, you didn’t want the memory to go to waste so you turned to Hyunjin and quietly asked when the rest of the guys were already walking away.

“Jinie, can you take one picture of me with Changbin?”

“Why?”

“Just for memories…” You smiled and you definitely saw the confused look on his face but nonetheless, he smiled and called the boy over. When Changbin was standing in front of you, Hyunjin told him what you wanted. Changbin looks at you and a smile creeps onto his face before he agrees to it.

You soon reached down to slide your hand in his and brought him to the edge of the pier. You stood beside him with the huge soft toy in your arms. Right when Hyunjin was just trying to find the right angle, you felt Changbin snake his arm around your waist and pulled you closer into his side.

Your heart was palpitating against your chest as he turned to you and whispered softly in your ear, “I’m sorry for being distant back then. I hope you can forgive me and we can start fresh? Properly this time?”

You turned to him, only to find his face just inches away from you. At this moment, neither of you dared to move an inch.

Just then, you heard Hyunjin’s voice counting down from 3.

You turned to Hyunjin and back to Changbin, wanting to ask what pose you two should do. But the moment you turned to Changbin, he gave you no warning whatsoever as he simply pressed his lips against yours sweetly. You closed your eyes in bliss, enjoying the feeling when you heard the click of the camera followed by Hyunjin screaming excitedly.

Changbin was the one to pull away as his lips lingered over your for a second. You struggled to look at him, feeling your cheeks burn from embarrassment. “Was that okay?” He whispered, making you nod.

“Hey! Since when are you two a thing?! And secretly behind my back too?! Pfft…” Hyunjin scoffed but his cheeky smirk didn’t go unnoticed.

“Yeah… about that, we still have a lot to clear between us…” Changbin said as he rubbed the back of his neck nervously but you helped him clear the air before Hyunjin got more confused with the situation.

“Let’s just say we have an unfinished history between us and we’re going to settle it once and for all, okay?” With that, Hyunjin nods as he wished you and Changbin good luck. The 3 of you rejoined the group, only for them to ask where you three were. Hyunjin simply said taking pictures, completely hiding the fact that he just witnessed his best friend kiss his close friend.

On the way to all your vehicles, Hyunjin asks if you wanted to ride home with Changbin instead and that he could send Jisung home. You turned to Changbin who overheard your conversation with Hyunjin.

You saw him smile as he shrugged his shoulders, so you turned to Hyunjin and felt your lips curving upwards into a soft expression, “I’d love that.”

With that, Changbin told Jisung the plan and the younger could only nod happily despite not knowing the true intentions of the car swap. After all of you had said your goodbyes, you followed Changbin to his car and he soon drove off after you told him your address.

The car ride was filled with jokes and laughter, purposely avoiding the main talks first until you got to your apartment.

You let him in, telling him to take a seat while you went to make him a drink. After you came back with his iced chocolate, you sat down with him on the couch. He took a few sips of it before he finally spoke up.

“Is it okay if we start over? I know I wasn’t the warmest when I was young… I barely socialize with you and your brother… I guess I was just too shy and a little antisocial back then.”

You smiled as you reached up to cup his face gently in your hand. “It’s okay Binie. I didn’t understand why back then but now I know.” You whispered, feeling him lean into your touch.

You didn’t know who leaned in first but the next thing you knew, you were kissing him.

On the lips.

Changbin wraps his arms around your waist as he pulls you onto his lap. Your heart was racing rapidly in your chest. He kisses you passionately, rubbing soft circles into your skin. Just then, your breath hitched in your throat when his lips left yours only to make his way down your neck.

“Changbin…” You whispered breathily, making him smirk against your skin.

You swiftly took off his shirt, pulling it over his head before doing the same for you. Changbin took a second to admire your body, seeing this much skin on you for the first time.

“Wow…” His voice soft, feeling yourself get shy all of a sudden. He chuckled as he kissed your lips to distract you.

He took his time with you, making sure he wasn’t hurting you in any way. He brought you to your room after a good amount of time on the couch. He had been so respectful of you that he would always ask for your permission to touch you anywhere. He left you wanting more.

He made sure to clean you after spending your time together before pulling you against him to cuddle. You couldn’t help but prop yourself on your elbow as you rested one hand on his bare chest, softly caressing it before sliding your hand up to cup his face.

“I’m so happy I found you again.” You whispered as he giggled. His eyes crinkled into two crescent moons that disappeared as soon as he smiled.

“I could say the same for you too.” Changbin said as he kissed you sweetly. Both of you fell into a deep slumber a few minutes later, waking up the next day feeling so warm and full in your hearts. You were happy that you met him again after all these years. Who knew you would end up with the boy whom you used to live next door to.

~~~