#I believe some of you are even my mutuals.
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Thanks for your response! I just want to clarify a few points.
Why should he grieve Saloâs death?
A year passed between acts 1 and 2, and even if Salo didnât join Viktorâs commune right away, I think he was there for a couple of months. And leaving didnât seem like an option (Iâll get back to that). If Viktor truly saw the commune members as people worthy of respect, itâs only natural to assume he wouldâve formed some kind of bond with them â especially as their leader, living alongside them all that time. Or did he deliberately keep his distance, never engaging, while they unquestioningly existed around him? Thatâs a rhetorical question â canon doesnât answer it, and I donât expect you to either. But if thatâs the implication, it only makes things more unsettling.
Now, about leaving not being an option â based on Saloâs unusual behaviour, Iâd argue that Viktorâs healing process altered more than just peopleâs bodies. It also changed their personalities. Thatâs why, IMO, none of them ever had a choice to leave after the transformation. And thatâs the point Iâve been making â both here and in my original post. Viktor never saw the commune members as individuals. But not in a âtheyâre my lab ratsâ way. More like a âtheyâre my fish and I gladly take care of the fish tankâ way.
Nope, you are definitely wrong.
I think the key misunderstanding here is the idea that having good intentions and being a control freak consumed by fear and delusion are mutually exclusive. Theyâre not. I never said that Viktor consciously thought this way. His fears are simply his blind spot. Yes, he genuinely wants to help people, but he also fails to recognise his deeper motivations.
Thatâs why he ends up not just healing them, but altering their appearances, possibly their personalities, and making them entirely dependent on him. Whether or not he meant to, he severed them from their past lives and gave them new ones, all based on his vision of whatâs good, while seeing no issue with it. Sure, in his mind, heâs pursuing a goal that is undeniably noble: making the world a better place. But that exact mindset, coupled with his failure to recognise his blind spots, is what leads to the final battle. Thatâs what makes Viktorâs symbiosis with Hexcore so dangerous.
That said, none of that makes him an evil mastermind bent on ruling the world. Heâs a flawed human who makes mistakes, and he just happened to wield a power that could reshape human souls. I think Viktor is a great example of how even the best and most genuine intentions can end up causing a lot of harm.
The theory that he was mind-controlled by Arcane is interesting and valid, and I agree that Arcane played a role in his changes. But I donât think thatâs the whole story. Viktor was always a complex character with both good and bad traits, and I believe Arcaneâs corruption amplified some of them while dulling others. I donât see why fear of losing control would be OOC for him. People can fall into extremes, and Viktorâs extreme was the belief that peace could only be achieved by eliminating any potential source of conflict in people â including their literal free will â and imposing that belief on everybody around. Personally, I like to view his arc as his response to the trauma of dying in the bombing rather than his possession by Arcane. But thatâs just me.
Oh, that is interesting. Did suddenly "the end justify the means" or becomes murder a great deed, if the right character is killed?
And I feel like I should address this as well. First, with all due respect, Iâd appreciate it if we could avoid passive-aggressive language. Second, no, I never said Jayce did a great thing by killing Salo (though one could argue that by then, Salo was already dead â overtaken by Viktor â and was essentially just a robot).
What I did say is that I was surprised by how people reacted as if Jayce had destroyed something pure and sacred when he killed Viktor, because I found the commune suspicious from the start and assumed Jayce had a deeper insight into what was really going on. And as we saw later, Jayce did see the commune as the lifeless constructs Viktor was turning them into. But remember, except for Salo, Jayce didnât touch any other commune member. His goal was to prevent the world from becoming the nightmare he saw in the parallel reality â in other words, to stop Viktor. And stopping Viktor was exactly what he did.
Viktorâs commune always gave off creepy vibes, but for me, the path it was taking became crystal clear at the start of ep6. That first scene basically spells out the extent of Viktorâs corruption and how far his actions and mindset are from any kind of altruism.
Think about it: Viktor sees Jayce kill Salo through Saloâs eyes. Heâs connected to Salo but doesnât even try to comfort him, verbally or mentally, or ease his pain with magic in his final moments. He just stands there, watching. Waiting for Salo to die, staring at Jayce. The only time he flinches is when Jayce lunges forward, and Salo dies abruptly â his vision cuts to black.
And look at Viktor's face when it happens. Thatâs not horror. Thatâs not astonishment. Thatâs not grief. Itâs⌠mild annoyance, I'd say?
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Like, ugh. Jayce didnât get it. He didnât appreciate my work. And now heâs also destroyed one of my puppets. Sounds pretty frustrating, doesn't it, Viktor?
Then Sky says, âpoor Saloâ, and Viktor? Immediately pivots to, âThatâs not Jayce. Itâs another will at work within himâ. And a moment later, heâs fascinated by the Anomaly. Saloâs gone, and no one spares him an extra thought.
And thatâs the thing about Viktorâs commune â it was never about the people who joined it. It was never about understanding them, helping them, or connecting with them. It was all about Viktorâs desperate need to be in control, about his refusal to confront suffering, pain, and all the messy, complicated parts of being human. From the very beginning, it was about Viktor going, âwell, the end justifies the meansâ, but thereâs nothing kind or humanistic about that philosophy, because it always comes at the expense of peopleâs lives. The end never justifies the means.
And honestly, I was surprised to see how many people were mad at Jayce for blasting Viktor at the end of that episode. In my opinion, by then, it was quite clear that Viktor didnât care much about his Arcane-modified toys. He wasnât even pretending he did. Salo wasnât a person to him. None of them were. They were just tools, stepping stones for his glorious evolution.
And all of that was right there in the first scene of ep6.
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A Statement on @patricia-taxxon
After recent events over the past couple of months, my co-director and I have decided that we are no longer working with Patricia Taxxon, and her score/sound design will not be used in the final release of our animated student thesis In Your Orbit. She has rights over all of the audio files that she created, and she is free to use or alter them for whatever other projects may come up for her. We only retain the rights to our visuals. On the off chance that the last festival that is showing the current version of the short gives us any prize money, she will still get a cut of it. She is free to continue to state publicly that she worked on the film originally, and use the soundtrack in her portfolio, but we will not be posting it or promoting it.Â
Patricia Taxxon has proven to be a person who is irresponsible at best. She has allegedly had inappropriate sexual conduct with minors as young as 13. She also regularly posts her extreme sexual fantasies on her main Tumblr, and has made claims regarding the nature of pedophilic art that she is not qualified to be making. She has also posted from behind closed doors that she has intentionally been manipulative regarding her apologies for her alleged sexual misconduct.
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The original victim who accused her was harassed off the internet both times she came out about this, and no longer wishes to be contacted on this matter. However, the idea that any of the allegations were ever rescinded due to misinformation, or proven untrue, is false. In my opinion, I believe the victimâs testimony. It lines up with what I remember the environment of Taxxon���s discord server being like when I was there.
During the production of the short film, I was already aware of some of the accusations made towards Taxxon, but as I was a close friend, I wanted to believe they werenât true. I was told that she was groomed into doing these things, that she didnât remember doing them, and that she was likely to commit suicide. She told me she was suicidal on a regular basis during production, especially when the alleged victim was making and then posted a video recounting the allegations. Before that video even came out, she was telling me it was likely to ruin her life irreparably. She had a mutual friend with the victim who was supposedly playing double agent for her, so I heard all about it before and after it came out. I was under the impression that she was in imminent danger of harming herself several times. You can imagine what this might do to a person who cares about her. So, I willfully ignored the allegations for a long time, up until the point that Taxxon showed outward bigotry towards my demographic in a Tumblr meltdown. I deserve criticism for this, and I wonât begrudge anyone who feels like I waited too long or came out with the leaks that I did for selfish reasons. That is your right, and Iâm sorry. I decided that all I could do was come out with what I do know and stop supporting this person, even if it costs me opportunities down the line.
Taxxon has also repeatedly shown herself to be extremely unprofessional, even for the standards of an internet drama cycle. She started by vaguely posting about myself on her Tumblr, stating that I am a threat to her, implying that I used her only to âdump her without warning,â and has repeatedly twisted my actions in order to gain sympathy from her Tumblr audience. She even begged her followers for someone else to take her to the Omaha Film Festival, before deleting that addition because she realized it made her look bad.
Her newest gripe with me is that I did not pay her for her work on the film, supposedly finding out partway through the project that she was not being paid. This is untrue. Luka and I were forthright with the fact that we were a team of two college students in Missouri with very little spending money. Thus, we offered her a cut of whatever we ended up making from the film in the festival circuit, planning to split any possible winnings among the three of us based on creative input. We also stated that we would not be taking a cut of any earnings she made off of the sale of the soundtrack, and that it would belong completely to her, just as my characters would to me. If any film companies approached us about the film to license it and the soundtrack, or if they wanted to use her music for another project involving these characters, that money would have gone to her. If she was confused about or had an issue with this arrangement, the time to bring that up would have been when we were discussing the agreement with her, or after any of the many critique sessions we went through with our professors and we were all discussing next steps, or really, any time at all during the year and a half that we were discussing and working on this project. But at no point before, during, or after production did she bring it up. She never suggested a rate, asked about other forms of payment, or anything. I was not holding a gun to her head. She could have brought it up with us at any time, and I am not a mind reader. Her only bringing up the subject now, after all of this time, points clearly to her attempting to extort me or use this issue as a way to gain sympathy from her Tumblr audience. It comes off like she wants to hold this over my head.
All of this not even mentioning that Taxxon was the one to say she wanted to work on the film, years before production started. This started as a collaboration between friends. Luka and I structured our agreement to be a partnership, where none of us were making guaranteed profit off of this project, especially since it is a student work, and we are not established artists with an audience. If anything, the person most likely to make any money off of this arrangement was Taxxon. We considered her an equal participant in this short film, and we wanted it to lift us all up. We gave her full artistic control over what vision she had for the soundtrack, and we often tried to cater our animation to best match it. This is why I found it strange when I asked if she was willing to contribute to festival fees, that she was very flippant with me about it. She stood to gain just as much as us from the film festival circuit, and I had already taken on the workload of doing research on and writing cover letters to each festival. Especially given that I pitched the festival circuit to her as a method to help her get her career offline and away from Kiwifarms, she had a lot to gain from all of this. As someone who had considered her a creative partner, her dismissal felt weird.
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This screenshot from the time shows what she said to me regarding the fees, and also shows that she was aware of the arrangement. Thankfully, a lot of this took place on her new Discord account, so I do have the evidence for this portion.
Then, a couple of days later, she asked me if she could stay in my co-directors house or mine for the duration of the Kansas City FilmFest International (or KCFFI). Given she had not contributed to us submitting to that very festival, and had been flippant with me in that same week about the subject, I found it disrespectful. A good friend of mine compared it to âstaying at a friendâs house and refusing to help with the grocery tab.â
And the fact that she decided to contribute to the DCP of all things because she âhad a vested interest in [the film] sounding good,â as if festival fees were beneath her, but this, now this was something she could be bothered to care about⌠It was very telling with regards to how she viewed this film.
If she wants to get her 30 bucks back, I can PayPal it back to her.
I stand by everything I said in my testimony on the stream with CrimsonEnder. Honestly, I feel I was much too forgiving on the subject of sexual misconduct, especially since at the time, all of us were trying to gloss over the specific allegations for the victimâs sake, as like I said, they did not want to be involved. As much as Taxxon blustered about âad-hominems,â I never called her names during the stream. I didnât even directly call her a transphobe or any kind of bigot. I did not diagnose her with a paraphilia. I specifically stated that her being a trans woman should have nothing to do with why she does the bad things she does. I discussed the things she said and the actions she took. I stated what I remember of our relationship and the events that took place during production, because she had already taken to misrepresenting me in her Tumblr posts. I wanted to lay everything out for full transparency, as she was telling a very specific story about me and who I was. I wanted to present my counter-narrative. I got vulnerable, upset, and fiery at times, but for a public crashout taking place very soon after my falling out of a six year long friendship, I think it gets my points across fine. Especially considering I was still freshly feeling the shock of her outwardly going on a tirade about trans men. The stream is still available on Crim's channel for those who want to hear what I said. Taxxon only presented a couple of my basic notes on the subject that were made to keep me on track.
Taxxon also, notably, sent her followers after CrimsonEnder in a purposeful attempt to incite a harassment campaign against him. She reblogged a reply from him, implying as much, and then he immediately received an anon referring to him with a slur, and saying he was now in âa Panopticon.â Taxxon would later be seen replying in a different but related conversation, misusing the word âPanopticonâ in the exact same way (Hint: the term for many people watching one would be a âSynopticon.â A Panopticon refers to one person watching many). You can find Crim's full statement about this incident on his blog.
She also referred to him as a âviolent misogynistâ who "threatened her in public" in a DM with me where she waved around the fact that she would be justified in âdragging me publiclyâ for my âbetrayalâ but wouldnât, as if it was some big act of charity from her.
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Only to, for some reason, make a request to CrimsonEnder (from behind a block) to take my testimony out of his stream and out of his document in a recent post. She is very vested in sowing division between myself and Crim, for what reason Iâm not sure. All I know is that she is not above harassing the people who criticize her, and given that, itâs very rich for Taxxon to posture like her not sending her followers after me thus far is an act of goodwill. If I were to guess, now that I have made this statement and cut her off from the project, she will feel much more comfortable going scorched earth. She no longer has a project to protect her connection to.
In Your Orbit will be released at some point in the indefinite future, with a new score and new foley work. I will not be attaching Taxxonâs name to it at all, positively or negatively. I will not be using any of the work that she produced, and I will never work with her in any capacity ever again. I cannot promote the work of a person who acts like this, who hurts others without remorse and uses her power as an influencer to get away with sweeping serious allegations under the rug. Especially given that none of our agreements were set in stone with a signed contract, I have no obligation to continue to associate with her after all she's done. I would be a hypocrite if I used her clout to profit or to expand my career opportunities. Even if it means I have to lose out on networking possibilities, lose the guaranteed audience, and pay out of my pocket to have the film re-scored and have a new foley track added. I am sticking to my principles on this. I refuse to coast on her coattails, and if this means that the film wonât be as successful, then so be it. Any recognition gained through affiliation with Patricia Taxxon is recognition that I donât want. I donât want her endorsement, and I donât want her audience.
I cannot control what Patricia Taxxon says or does. She can do whatever she wants with her life and career, but leave me and my art out of it.
-Jules Hydes
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your love, like birth and death
synopsis. in which you hope a misguided prince realizes his affection for you is misplaced gratitude for you saving his life. a smitten prince can only propose once more.
pairing. gojou satoru x f!reader
word count. 3.1k | masterlist
content warning. faerie au, seelie prince!gojou, banshee!reader (afab), mentions of pregnancy, descriptions of blood and injuries, mutual pining but gojou's love is heavier, almost kisses
reblogs & interactions appreciated.
another repost of a favorite fic of mine to finally get something on the jjk masterlist i have set up. the title comes from a nizar qabbani poem, one of my favorites. anyone who knows me knows banshees are one of my favorite faeries, so this was a very fun piece for me to write!
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This Court is dyed in the colors of Life, you note this particular morning.
Of course, this is something youâve noted every morning since youâd been brought to this palace nearly a month ago. Yet you arenât tired of noting it; the Court you have found yourself in is beautiful. From the ledge you lean against, it almost feels like you can see everything in Faerie.
You see the royal gardens, a mass of long grasses and moss dotted by colorful wild blooms. Overgrown and yet each flower seems right where it is supposed to be.
Beyond the walls of the castle, you see stretches and stretches of blue spruces and just beyond that a lake that almost seems purple. If this were a palace in Unseelie territory, you might have thought a kelpie lived in it.
Across the courtyard, souls living and deceased move as if in a dance. The living with their duties for the day, unaware of their ghoulish companions drifting about. Some have the ever permanent dribble of poisoned wines falling from their lips, othersâ have blood seeping into their clothes from their torsos and others are missing limbs although they find no difficult in moving.
The sight of death faeries is one that gruesome. A mixture of life and death, the path you folk walk on until you return to nothing.
Neat yet unkempt, wild yet tame, expected yet unexpected ăź that is the beauty of Faerie youâve grown accustomed to in the centuries since your creation.
A beauty you rarely have the opportunity to appreciate when you often find yourself in the realm of humans, heralding death.
You wonder how much time has passed there since youâve come to the Court of Reckoning. All while the skies have lost the traces of violet, peach and marigold that painted the dawn skies and have begun settling into a lovely shade of pastel blue.Â
âI see Iâve finally found you,â when you look over your shoulder, itâs one of the princeâs advisors that greets you. The one with the long raven-black hair and brown eyes that remind you of humus-rich soil. You see the makings of a black tail with a tuft of fur peeking from his cloak and believe him to be some sort of phouka. âI almost thought for a moment our honored guest had disappeared,â his voice is light and airy, but he seems relieved to an extent. âIâm glad my concerns were proven untrue. Satoru would be quite unmanageable if that were the case.â
You shake your head, smiling politely, âI enjoy watching dawn turn into morning.â You look at the large bouquet in the phoukaâs hands ăź an assortment of lavender roses, babyâs breath and ferns.
âOur prince is too busy to deliver these himself this morning,â Suguru explains once theyâve caught your eye. You make sure to not let your fingers brush against one another when you reach for the blooms carefully. âLove at first sight, purity and fascination it is supposed to symbolize,â the advisor recounts the meaning of each bloom dutifully. Heâs exasperated, you can tell. âDo you like them?â
âYes, theyâre quite lovely,â you believe so truly. Everyday since your arrival to the palace, the prince has had bouquet after bouquet gifted to you. Even if he cannot deliver them himself. âAs were the rest Iâve received.â
âIâve never seen Satoru so smitten,â you avoid the phoukaâs gaze. âYou should have met him when we were younger. He was adamant that heâd never be besotted with anyone lest he become a fool.â Thereâs a light pause as Suguru recalls the evening Satoru brought you to this palace. You who are cloaked in death and all of her colors. âLook at him now. Heâs certainly caused a stir in his insistence youâll be his queen. Heâs a charming fool, though, I am sure.â
You prefer to think of the prince as a ridiculous fool but you cannot deny that he is charming. Dangerously so. If you hadnât known better, you would have thought him to be a gancanagh, a love-talker.
âPlease marry me,â came the soft request as sky blue eyes stared into your very being. âAnd Iâll love you more faithfully than any man, fae or otherwise.â
You try not to remember the way your chest clenched in surprise. How you were so surprised it almost felt like your skin had warmed. Itâs best not to focus on that memory at all.
Itâs a ridiculous notion, a seelie prince in love with a banshee.
âThe prince is simply confusing gratitude with love,â you return Suguruâs gaze with a polite smile. You hope he believes you. âHeâll realize that soon and I will leave this place.â You know that will bring palace staff a great sense of peace. If there is one thing youâve learned in your long life as a banshee it is that even if the Folk spurn mortals and their blink-of-an-eye lifespans, there are many things faeries and humans have in common.
A fear of death is certainly one of them.
As such, to the vast majority of faeriekind, Death Folk like yourself are not looked upon favorably. Banshee and dullahans alike, youâre more like pests in their eyes.Â
You banshee women who scream and keen if death is near.Â
The dullahans who hear those screams and arrive when that final hour has approached.
Yes, you know how death fae are viewed. Youâve heard the whispers in the palace, how you are an omen of malevolence to come. That your kind are like roaches. Should one appear, others will soon follow suit.
This is why youâve come to appreciate this private ledge on the castle walls that receives less foot traffic than the rest. Youâd rather the staff of the palace have peace of mind in your absence while you live in the palace even if their prince insists you can venture the halls as much as youâd like.
Once the promised revel he hopes to throw in your honor comes to pass, you know the prince will lose his interest in you. Then you will leave and continue about your existence until you fade into nothing but a vague memory in his subconscious.
Thatâs what you truly hope when you see the prince in question later on in the day for lunch in the garden.
How his eyes light up and he stands to his feet as Cypress, a lovely pixie tasked with being your attendant, announces your arrival. How he doesnât even wait for you to reach the table before he comes to meet you. You are unused to being treated like royalty and yet their prince insists that you are. âYou wonât believe how the old hags go on and on,â he sighs, remnants of annoyance dancing in his tone but his voice is soft with you. Cypress takes the dismissal in stride. âI couldnât even come see you for breakfast. Did you like the flowers?â
He wraps your hands in his own large palms, seemingly unaffected by your corpse-cold skin, as he has done every time youâve met since your arrival. âYes, they were beautiful,â your smile is small and doesnât quite reach your eyes. You hope this ridiculous yet charming fool realizes that loving one such as yourself is more trouble than good. That his love truly is just misplaced gratitude. âYou really donât have to send me flowers every morning.â
The prince disregards your words the way water rolls off the back of a duck, ânext time Iâll bring you the flowers myself.â He guides you to the table filled to the brim with food you arenât accustomed to eating. âWill you tell me your favorites finally? Iâve been going out on a limb with my guesses.â
âMy tastes in flowers are unique, to say the least,â maybe itâs your nature, but your favorites tend to circle around the prevailing theme of your kind. Lavender to give the dead peace in passing on, calendula for blessing and love. Dandelions in the seed head stage were quite popular with ghost children, still finding them just as amusing as they did when they were alive. âThe flowers you send me are more than enough.â The prince pouts but he decides to let you skirt around his request once more. You bring focus back to the spread, âit looks like youâve demanded everything in the kitchen.â
There are strawberry-and-whipped cream filled pastries, cold cut platters and buttery biscuits to name a few things. The tip of the iceberg of everything on the table.
âI wanted to make sure our bases were covered,â the prince grins, teeth as white as his hair. âI hope you like lavender chamomile, thatâs todayâs tea. Iâve never had it before.â He drops cube after cube of sugar into his cup, drizzles the contents with honey before finally pouring in a splash of cream.
You take your tea plain and enjoy the gentle fragrance. Lavender buds are just barely visible below the teaâs surface. You close your eyes as the flavor hits your tongue. It tastes as wonderful as it smells. âYes, this is quite nice. I really like it.â
âShould we have it for tomorrow as well?â Heâs too eager to curry your favor.
You open your eyes to dissuade him but your attention is instead drawn to a headless hob nearing your table. Youâve seen this hob before, skirting about the palace bitterly as he carries his head in his hands much like a dullahan. Heâs old, even by fae standards, with a long beard. Thereâs no question as to how the man died, beheading. You hope it was quick.
His beady eyes glare at you with a quiet rage similar to how most fae spirits do. You wonder how long he has been like this, refusing to board the carriage of any dullahan that may come to collect him and bring him to the Otherworld.
You personally believe that faeries leave behind ghosts more than humans do.
Itâs why youâve often seen ghosts from a distance at revels, dancing from dawn til dusk even if they will not be perceived by the living. Even if they can no longer don the fancy dresswear they were able to dress in.
Time and time again, they will do this. Staunchly refusing death even after theyâre already in its hold.
âOh, is there a ghost with us?â The prince notes how your eyes dart between him and the space he perceives as empty. âWhatâs it saying?â
âTell this lout that I sooner hope his rule is contemptuous and brings the Court to ruin!â The hobâs head seethes. âThat his many days are fraught with danger! Gakuganji is my name and this is the curse I cast upon him!â
Folk canât lie, but you you prefer not to relay the bitter message. âHe hopes your rule is one that is,â you lick your lips and raise your cup to your lips. âFilled with exciting thrills,â not an exact lie. Perhaps to this radical prince, those sorts of threats are exciting. âHe says his name is Gakuganji.â
âExciting thrills, you say?â The prince barks in amusement, shoulders shaking with his laughter. âThat doesnât sound like the traitorous scoundrel I know. You donât have to lie, heâs probably cursing me and my bloodline for generations to come as we speak.â The hob growls at the lackadaisical nonchalance of the elf. But it seems he has had his fill as he stomps off before he can hear more insult to his person.
âGakuganji has lost his touch even in death,â the princeâs amused chuckles turn into light sighs âYou wouldnât have liked him very much when he was alive,â youâre sure you can agree with that much of the princeâs words. Gakuganji, as you now know him, has been one of the more unpleasant spirits in the palace. âHe was very stuck in his ways. Whatâs it like, seeing ghosts all the time?â
Normal?
You canât quite remember what it was like when you were a newly-made banshee and everything was new. Nor can you remember the life you once led as a human. You simply remember your death was a terrible, terrible thing. âItâs as normal to me as itâs normal for you not to see them,â you set your cup down. âIf someone asked you whatâs it like to see the blue sky everyday, it would be a strange question, correct?â
The prince takes in your words thoughtfully, not slighted in the least. âI guess thatâs true,â he nods to himself. âI just wondered if it was something that took some getting used to.â The prince removes his darkened spectacles from the bridge of his nose. âI told you before I have pretty good eyes. Iâm able to perceive a lot of things no one else can from mana to the shape of oneâs soul. But the spirits of the deceased are exceptions to my eyes, it seems.â
âYour Highness,â you begin.
âSatoru,â the prince corrects you swiftly.
âYour Highness,â you insist. This boundary you wonât cross for yourself. âIâm not sure itâs really wise for you to tell me about your eyes. Iâm not a member of this family or your closest allies.â
âBut you will be,â he tells you as if heâs simply remarking on how pleasant the weather is. âI will become king of this Court and youâll be by my side as my queen.â Youâre quite sure that if his mother, the High Queen, has anything to say about it, sheâd sooner relinquish her throne to a random nixie than allow a banshee to wed her son. âI trust you as much as I trust Suguru or Nanami.â
You wish he wouldnât.
A Seelie prince and his banshee queen? That sounds like the start to a ballad meant to insult him.
Itâs misplaced gratitude, not love. Thatâs what this prince feels for you. You tell him as such once again as you have everyday since you were brought here. âYouâll realize that soon, maybe even before the revel you plan for me,â you whisper ăź no, you pray. âThere will be another you yearn for and youâll realize the difference.â
The prince will fall deeply, truly, unapologetically in love with someone and heâll discover the truth.
Perhaps it will be a lake maiden of Spring whose dreadlocks drip with water droplets that fall onto dewy cinnamon-brown skin. Who sings of the beautiful red and pink of the roses and of love.
Or maybe it will be a selkie man who doesnât mind living far from the sea as heâs brought a love as deep as the ocean along with him. Whose coat is donned in scars and scratches from battles past, a reflection of his form as a seal.
Or maybe he can grow enraptured with his phouka advisor whom he trusts more than anyone in this life.
Someone dyed in Lifeâs colors.
Someone beautiful.
When that time comes, youâll be happy for him. Maybe then the ache that resonates through your heart and bones will end.
The prince isnât the only fool here, you admit reluctantly. Youâre just as much, if not more so. But this feeling will come to pass, âthis is just gratitude. Fascination. Not love.â
âYou think I donât love you?â The prince asks quietly, resting his chin on his palm as he looks at you. He says he has good eyes, he wonder what you look like to him through them. You who once was dyed in Lifeâs colors but have since become painted over by Deathâs brush.
Death folk with death folk.
Life folk with life folk.
âI know you donât,â he canât. You canât allow either of yourselves to do so. âA banshee by your side as queen,â you want it sound ridiculous to both of your ears. âItâs absurd.â
There are no rules that state your union is forbidden, this you know. But the laws of nature are simple. Life and Death co-exist separately, unable to exist without one another. But there has never been a tale where the two joined together as one.
Maybe youâre just too scared to be the first.
âI want the woman that I love by my side as queen,â the prince replies smoothly. âYour species is of little importance to me. All that matters is that my love is returned in full. Please, allow me to be yours,â he reaches for your hand once more, stepping out of his chair in favor of sitting on bended knee. âMore than anyone has or ever will, I love you. This is an unwavering truth.â
The blood of the love-talker must run through his veins. Why else do you feel like this? Your desire for this prince will eat away at you until you become undone and return to nothing. âYouâre a prince. Itâs the duty of the royal family to provide heirs,â even the smallest sprite knows this to be fact. âAre you asking me to stay with you and have them?â
âPlease have my children,â azure stares seriously into your pale eyes that were once [color] when you were human.
Your skin feels warm at his unabashed request.
Gojou Satoru has no shame, that you have become sure of in the near month of knowing one another.
He had no shame when he asked you to be his bride when you first met.
There was no shame to be found when he insisted that you stay in the palace as an honored guest he owes his life to.
Nor is there any shame to be found in him now when he cups your cheek in his furnace hot hands to guide your lips down to his, long white lashes fluttering shut.
I shouldnât, your mind screeches at you. I shouldnât allow us to get even one millimeter closer. Yet you make no move to do so as your lips are just barely touching whenăź
âYour Highness, your mother is requesting you,â Nanamiâs mild-mannered drawl saves you at the last minute.
You jerk back into your chair in relief, heart pounding. You arenât able to make eye contact with anyone, least of all the overworked horned elf-kobold hybrid brought to receive the Gojou heir.
The prince clicks his tongue in annoyance, glaring over his shoulder at the advisor, âshe canât wait? We havenât even begun eating yet.â
Nanami looks just as annoyed to be there, âthe faster you heed her call, the quicker you can go back to fawning after the object of your desires.â He tells his prince. âAnd the faster I can get back to resting.â
The prince with snow-white hair clicks his tongue once more, but he doesnât argue against it. He turns to you regretfully, âIâll have to leave again. Perhaps weâll have more time together at dinner,â you hope the wait for dinner is longer still. You know the prince hopes the time passes as quickly as he can blink.
Warm lips press against the back of your hand, lingering for five seconds longer than they should.
The bones of your hands ache.
#romance dawn ăź đ
#jjk x reader#jujutsu kaisen x reader#gojo x reader#gojou x reader#gojo satoru x reader#gojou satoru x reader#jjk x black!reader#gojo x black!reader#jujutsu kaisen x black!reader
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JUST MEET ME AT THE APT.â K. SAE-BYEOK
CHAPTER ONE
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/855d839716fde42c398f93bbfc119f71/dea28367092fefac-51/s540x810/c72e27ae684d3e6c8e7b0021f0ed0579fc030787.jpg)
synopsis: managing a rising rock band is already chaotic enough, but when you're stuck touring with four reckless musicians, things get even messier. between late-night facetime calls, teasing that feels a little too knowing, and a certain guitarist who might just be your biggest problem, keeping things professional is getting harder by the second. but hey, no one said the music industry was easy.
warnings: mutual pining, intense eye contact, teasing that borders on flirting (or maybe it is flirting), friends who refuse to mind their business, late-night facetime calls, secondhand embarrassment, slow burn that burns, emotional whiplash
playlist: spotify
âOkay, letâs go over this one more timeââ
A chorus of groans erupted around you, loud and exaggerated. Se-Mi flopped dramatically onto the couch, Ji-Yeong threw her head back like you had just sentenced her to death, and No-Eul simply sighed as she scrolled through her phone.
âI mean it,â you said, crossing your arms as you stood in the middle of the hotel suite. âThis is a BuzzFeed interview. Theyâre going to ask easy, fun questions, but you guys still need to sound like you have at least half a brain between the four of you.â
Sae-Byeok, sitting on the arm of the couch, smirked. âThatâs a lot to ask.â
You shot her a look, and she just raised her hands in surrender.
âThis is why youâre our manager and not our PR rep,â Ji-Yeong said, grinning. âYou actually care if we sound stupid.â
âYes, and Iâd like to keep my job,â you shot back. âSo please, for the love of everything holy, just try not to say anything thatâll get us trending for the wrong reasons.â
Se-Mi, still sprawled on the couch, waved a hand lazily. âRelax, sweetheart. Weâll be fine. Itâs just BuzzFeed.â
âYeah,â Ji-Yeong chimed in, âworst case scenario, we end up in some âDumbest Celebrity Interview Momentsâ compilation on YouTube. Free promo.â
You pinched the bridge of your nose. âI hate all of you.â
No-Eul, ever the voice of reason, finally spoke up. âTheyâll behave,â she said, barely looking up from her phone. âMostly.â
âThatâs not reassuring,â you muttered.
Sae-Byeok, watching you with an amused expression, nudged your side with her foot. âYou worry too much.â
âBecause one of us has to,â you shot back.
She smirked. âAnd thatâs why youâre our favorite.â
Before you could process that (did Sae-Byeok just call you their favorite?), a knock on the door interrupted the conversation. Their stylist popped her head in, clipboard in hand.
âAlright, you guys,â she said. âTime to get dressed. Interviewâs in an hour.â
Se-Mi groaned as she sat up. âUgh, do we have to?â
âYes,â you, No-Eul, and the stylist all said at the same time.
Ji-Yeong snickered. âAlright, alright, letâs go.â
As they shuffled off to get ready, Sae-Byeok lingered for a second, watching you.
âYouâre really stressed about this, huh?â she asked, tilting her head.
You exhaled. âI just want this to go well. You guys are blowing up, and interviews like this can really shape how people see you.â
She was quiet for a moment, thenâ
ââŚWeâll be fine.â
You looked up at her.
There was something steady in the way she said it, something that made you believe her.
You sighed, shaking your head. âYou better be.â
She smirked and, with that, disappeared into the dressing room.
And you? You just prayed they wouldnât give you a heart attack on live camera.
You stood off to the side, arms crossed, watching as the girls got settled in the bright, modern-looking BuzzFeed studio. Cameras were being adjusted, mic packs were clipped onto their outfits, and a giant board with pre-written search questions was placed in front of them.
Ji-Yeong, of course, was already messing with it. âOoooh, the mystery,â she teased, wiggling her fingers dramatically over the top of the board.
Se-Mi grinned, leaning forward. âI love these types of interviews. People Google the weirdest shit.â
No-Eul sighed, adjusting her mic. âThatâs what Iâm afraid of.â
Sae-Byeok, as usual, looked completely unbothered, sitting back in her chair with her arms crossed, waiting for things to start.
The interviewer, a cheerful BuzzFeed staff member, smiled at them from across the table. âAlright! Welcome, HOT DIVISION!â
A chorus of greetings followed, with Ji-Yeong and Se-Mi being the loudest while No-Eul and Sae-Byeok gave more subdued nods.
âWeâre going to be doing the âMost Searched Questionsâ,â the interviewer explained, patting the board. âEach of these has a commonly searched question about you guys, and youâll take turns peeling them off and answering.â
Ji-Yeong rubbed her hands together. âLetâs go.â
You prayed they wouldnât say anything that would give your PR team a migraine.
Ji-Yeong, naturally, was the first to go. She dramatically peeled off the first strip of paper, reading it aloud.
ââIs Kim Ji-Yeong⌠actually as chaotic as people say?ââ
She gasped, clutching her chest. âI am offended by this question.â
Se-Mi snorted. âYou shouldnât be. Itâs true.â
Ji-Yeong turned to the camera, dead serious. âI am a delight to be around.â
No-Eul, without looking up, muttered, âThatâs a lie.â
Sae-Byeok just smirked, shaking her head.
Ji-Yeong sighed dramatically. âFine. Yes. I am chaotic. But would you all love me if I wasnât?â
Se-Mi threw an arm around her. âExactly. Chaos is in our brand.â
You pinched the bridge of your nose from the sidelines.
Sae-Byeok lazily reached forward, peeling off the next strip. She read it, then raised an eyebrow.
ââIs Kang Sae-Byeok single?ââ
Ji-Yeong and Se-Mi exploded into laughter.
âOH, THIS IS GOOD,â Se-Mi cackled, slapping the table.
Sae-Byeok just sighed, giving the camera a blank look. âYes.â
Ji-Yeong leaned forward, wiggling her eyebrows. âAnd are youââ
âNo.â
Se-Mi pouted. âYou didnât even let her finish.â
Sae-Byeok shrugged. âDidnât need to.â
You watched from the sidelines, carefully keeping your expression neutral. (Not that you were thinking about it. Not at all.)
No-Eul peeled her question off, scanning it briefly before exhaling.
ââIs Kang No-Eul the mom of the group?ââ
The response was immediate.
âYes,â Se-Mi said.
âAbsolutely,â Ji-Yeong added.
âThe only responsible one,â Sae-Byeok confirmed.
No-Eul, unimpressed, just stared at them. âI hate all of you.â
Ji-Yeong grinned. âSee? Mom behavior.â
Fourth Question: "Is Han Se-Mi�"
Se-Mi eagerly peeled off her question, reading it with interest.
ââIs Han Se-Mi the flirtiest member?ââ
You already knew what was coming.
Se-Mi gasped dramatically, placing a hand over her heart. âMe? A flirt? How dare you.â
Sae-Byeok rolled her eyes. âYou literally flirt with the camera.â
Ji-Yeong nodded sagely. âShe flirts with air molecules.â
Se-Mi turned to the camera, giving a slow, knowing smirk. âI just like to make people feel special.â
From the side, you muttered under your breath, âMenace.â
Se-Mi heard you and shot a wink in your direction.
Ji-Yeong peeled off the last question, reading it aloud.
ââIs HOT DIVISION the next big thing in rock?ââ
The girls exchanged glances.
Then, Sae-Byeok leaned forward slightly, looking straight into the camera.
âYes.â
No hesitation. No doubt. Just raw confidence.
Ji-Yeong smirked. âDamn right we are.â
Se-Mi grinned. âHope youâre all ready.â
No-Eul nodded. âBecause weâre not slowing down.â
From the sidelines, you felt something warm bloom in your chest.
They had come a long way. And they were just getting started.
taglist: @everly-summers-solace @knfthxv @madebysae @knfthxv @katieschry1 @imlackingsleep @lyzem @stellssxo @wiltingconquest @peelover25
#sae byeok#squid game#fanfic#saebyeok x reader#wlw fiction#kang sae byeok x reader#wuh luh wuh#rockstar au#âËŕż just meet me at the apt.
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I have a doozy of a work week coming up, so I don't anticipate having much time to write. So enjoy this little Valentine's Day angst-fluff-smut combo Iâve been sitting on for a while. Thank you for reading and have a splendid Valentine's Day if you celebrate - regardless, you are loved! â¤ď¸
XOXO, Anonymous
Sebastian Sallow x F!OC
Rating: Explicit/MDNI (smut, profanity); all characters are 18+ Words: 6,323 Tags: friends to lovers, Valentine's Day, love letters, misunderstandings, mutual pining, angst, fluff, Seb is extra stupid in this one
Summary: Sebastian Sallow has been hopelessly in love with Annalisa Lark since the day they met during fifth year. So when he discovers a love letter to Ominis seemingly sent from her, he begins a downward spiral. Once the truth comes out, he'll realize actions sometimes speak louder than words.
Notes: This one's split into two parts in case you want to skip the smut. Part I is angst and fluff. Part II is smut. All characters are 18-year-old seventh years. MC in this one is a Ravenclaw named Annalisa Lark.
Read on AO3 or both parts below the cut.
Part I
Sebastian Sallow trudged into his dormitory, exhausted after a particularly grueling quidditch practice. The room was empty, presumably because all his roommates were already elbow-deep in their dinners.Â
Sebastian would have gone straight to the Great Hall to join them, but heâd been neglecting a Potions essay that was due in the morning. He just needed to grab a book and heâd head to the library for a few hours of writing.
Except Sebastianâs Potions book was nowhere to be found. He cursed under his breath as he realized heâd left it in the locker room. With no desire to make the trek all the way back to the quidditch pitch, Sebastian decided heâd merely borrow Ominisâ book. Surely Ominis had completed the essay ages ago.
The book sat on the desk next to Ominisâ bed, resting on its back atop a neat stack of parchment. Sebastian picked it up and moved to gather some parchment and quills of his own when a folded sheet slipped from the bookâs pages. It fluttered to the floor and landed face-up, open, as if its contents were meant to be seen.
Typically, Sebastian wouldnât dare read his friendâs mail. He would never willingly violate Ominisâ trust, not after it had taken him two years to regain it after the events of fifth year. But a few choice words scrawled on the parchment caught Sebastianâs eye as he bent down to retrieve it. He paused, his hand hovering above the letter until he finally gathered the nerve to pick it up and read it.
His tired pout morphed into a full-fledged frown.
Dearest Ominis,
Your last letter made me smile. You have such a way with words that I always find myself re-reading your letters over and over again. I hope they never stop, even if we can one day be together.
Speaking of, have you given any further thought to discussing our potential relationship with Sebastian? I know youâre worried it could sever your friendship, but please donât. He cares about both of us far too much, and I truly believe he merely wants to see us happy.
I love you, Ominis. I love you, and Iâm tired of pretending I donât. After everything that happened to me during fifth year, Iâve realized life is far too short to be separated from the ones we love.
Please give what I said some more consideration. See you soon.
XOXO, A.
It took a moment for Sebastian to realize his hands were shaking. His palms were sweating and his stomach churned. He couldnât even pinpoint which emotion had taken charge of his body â disbelief, surely, but what about the betrayal? And the pain⌠my god, the pain. It slammed through Sebastianâs chest, knocking the wind from his lungs.
He read it again. Call him a masochist, but he had to be sure he understood correctly. He prayed his eyes had somehow managed to trick him, that it had all been a projection of his own deepest fears, or perhaps some cruel prank Ominis cooked up.
But Ominis wasnât a prankster. And he would never joke about something as complex as Sebastianâs feelings â not when it came to her. Or so he thought.Â
Sebastian had loved Annalisa Lark since the day she absolutely dismantled him during a duel in Defense Against the Dark Arts class. She was stunning to him in every sense of the word, and while their friendship was sometimes turbulent, Sebastian flocked to her like children to candy. Heâd never admit to it, though. The only person who seemed to understand was Ominis.
But now, it seemed Ominis understood more than heâd let on. Sebastian stilled himself, the letter still in his hand. Had his best friend really stolen the love of his life? Perhaps that was a bit dramatic. She wasnât Sebastianâs to steal. He was certain she didnât even have those kinds of feelings for him. Still, surely Ominis knew about that unspoken gentlemenâs rule about not romancing your best friendâs love interest.
Sebastianâs shock shifted to fury. His conniption swelled as he mulled the situation over. His best friend had swooped in on her. The one and only girl he couldnât bear to lose.Â
He had to toss the letter aside to stop himself from crumpling it into a ball. Knives clouded his vision. He could choke Ominis until the life left his eyes. She said she loved him. She told Ominis the only words that could likely save Sebastian from a tragic demise.
And worst of all, theyâd kept their romance a secret from him. They didnât deem him worthy of sharing their secret. They thought itâd be easier to keep him out of their equation. He wasnât meant to be a part of their secret society.Â
Sebastian sank onto his bed, his gaze wavering in and out of focus. He didnât know what to do. Should he storm down to the Great Hall and demand answers from them? Should he keep quiet and pretend he didnât know? Should he make a last-ditch effort love declaration in hopes of stealing Annalisa back to her rightful place?
All of those options made sense in Sebastianâs mind, but Sebastian Sallow rarely made sense when it came to the most important matters of the heart.
Dinner and Potions essays be damned, Sebastian decided to retreat to the Undercroft.
---
âSebastian! There you are.âÂ
For the first time in nearly three years, Sebastian was dismayed to find Annalisa in the Undercroft. She was curled up on a sofa sheâd conjured during their fifth year, a book open across her lap.
Even from where he stood, Sebastian could see it was a romance novel. She was always reading those, as if she enjoyed the escapism into a world of longing stares and declarations of desire. She didnât know she was living inside one of those novels; though this one was currently creeping toward an angst-ridden, tragic ending as far as Sebastian was concerned. The trope of his life was morphing from secret pining to the one that got away.
âThere you are,â Sebastian replied. It was their routine greeting, a symbol of their bond since they were fifteen. Even in crisis, he wouldnât stray from it. He needed its familiarity.Â
âWhereâve you been?â Annalisa asked curiously as she shifted to one side of the sofa to make room for him.
âQuidditch practice.â
âDid you eat? I didnât see you at dinner. I have some apples in my bag.â
Sebastian shook his head as he took the other half of the sofa. His posture betrayed him. He typically slouched into his seat, his knees parted while his hands absentmindedly twirled his wand. But tonight, he was rigid, his spine far too stiff and straight to fool her. âIâm not hungry.â
Annalisa frowned, her book now forgotten as she set it aside. âSince when have you ever turned down a meal?â she demanded with narrowed eyes. âWhatâs wrong?â
âNothing,â Sebastian lied.
Annalisa scowled at him. âSebastian Edward Sallow, do not play with me.â
Sebastian nearly barked a laugh at the irony of it all. If anything, she was the one playing with him; sneaking around behind his back with his own best friend, penning him passionate love letters while Sebastian had been none the wiser.Â
He wanted to be disgusted with her, to lash out and demand answers. He wanted her to know how hurt he was by her decision to omit him from such a significant portion of her life. Even if she didnât choose him, she could have at least filled him in on her stirring new romance â especially since it involved their mutual best friend.
But Sebastian could never be repulsed by her, even if he felt slighted. She was too much of all the good things Sebastian admired in life â a stunning little spitfire compressed into five feet of fearless conviction. She was compassionate and complex; she didnât view the world in black and white the way so many others preferred to. She understood the frayed seams between good and evil and light and darkness.Â
That realization was the moment Sebastian was certain he loved her. She stood by him after Solomonâs death and offered him unwavering support, because she knew the nuances of right and wrong. She had blood on her hands, too. The difference in their bloodshed was hers was an effort to quell darkness; Sebastianâs bloodshed had embraced it.
Still, Annalisa understood Sebastian at a level that transcended mere friendship, and because of that, Sebastian had grown certain she was his soulmate. But now, he wasnât sure he knew her at all.
âSebastianâŚâ Annalisa was still peering at him expectantly.Â
âNothingâs wrong,â he insisted, his tense posture still exposing his discomfort. âIâm just exhausted, is all.Â
Annalisa opened her mouth, fully prepared to interrogate him into a confession, but the entrance to the Undercroft clanged open again, revealing Ominisâ arrival. Sebastian stiffened even more.
âOminis!â Annalisa greeted. âSebastian here was just about to tell me why heâs so moody.â
âSebastian, moody? I canât imagine,â came Ominisâ dry reply.
Sebastian was in no mood for teasing remarks. Not when he was the third wheel to the two people he thought he trusted most. His irritation surged, and before he could suppress it, he was on his feet.
âIâll just leave you two to it then, yeah?â he snapped.Â
âSebastian, what-âÂ
Sebastian brushed past a stunned Ominis and sulked from the Undercroft.
---
Sebastian hated Valentineâs Day. What a stupid, sordid excuse of a holiday, he thought. He slouched over his corner of the Slytherin table in the Great Hall as he watched his classmates exchange jovial greetings and giggles over romantic gifts. It was positively nauseating. The arrival of Ominis taking the seat across from him didnât sweeten the day.
âBrooding in the corner on Valentineâs Day,â Ominis mused. âHow very cliche of you.â Sebastian didnât reply. Ominis sighed and set his stack of books on the table between them. âGoing to share with the class whatâs had you so bent out of shape?â
Again, no reply. Ominis was no stranger to Sebastianâs tempestuous moods. They always became particularly stormy when Annalisa was inundated with attention from their classmates. Today, she sat at the Ravenclaw table with a short stack of valentines and an assortment of sweets surrounding her. Truthfully, Sebastian could cope with that â heâd witnessed their classmatesâ attempts to court Annalisa on countless occasions. He was used to that. He wasnât used to the nauseating knowledge that his own best friend was the one who had secured her heart, and in secret nonetheless.Â
âAlright, mate,â Ominis sighed as he gathered his books again and stood. âBut Cupidâs arrow isnât going to find you while youâre commiserating by your lonesome self in a corner.â
As he retreated toward the doors of the Great Hall, Sebastian considered chucking a potato at his head. But something else stole his attention.
Another letter. Ominis must have left it accidentally in his haste to flee Sebastianâs orbit of agony. Sebastian snatched it off the table immediately, took a quick glance around the Great Hall, and read.
Dearest Ominis,
Happy Valentineâs Day, love! Thank you for the gorgeous flowers. They look positively stunning at my bedside. I look forward to gazing at them as the last thing Iâll see before I fall asleep. You are always the last thing on my mind at night anyway.
I am so looking forward to seeing you tonight. I hope it will be just as special for you as it is for me. See you at 7:00.
XOXO, A.
The edges of the parchment curled inward as Sebastianâs hands shook. They had a secret date planned for the night. They were going to have a romantic night together and neither of them felt any obligation to tell him. Their friendship was no longer a trio. They were a pair, plus one, single fool.
Sebastian crumpled the letter and stashed it in his pocket. He prayed Cupid would choke on a pumpkin pasty.
---
Sebastianâs sour mood didnât stop there. It devolved by the afternoon, until all who crossed his path were at risk of a terrible lashing.Â
Finally, Annalisa found him pouting beneath the Transfiguration Courtyard fountain.
âSebastian,â she said sternly, her green eyes drilling him with impatience. âWhat is the matter with you? Ominis says youâre positively insufferable. What has happened?â
Of course Ominis called him that. Ominis was a treasonous, back-stabbing traitor who was too cowardly to even admit he was in love. If Sebastian had Annalisa, heâd tell the whole world, and would burn it down if anyone dared to question him.
âOminis knows exactly what heâs done,â Sebastian snapped.Â
âClearly not,â Annalisa challenged him. âAll we know is something has you upset. Stop isolating yourself and tell us. Tell me, at the very least.â
How rich. She was begging him to tell her, when she hadnât bothered to tell him about her new little love affair.
âTell you what,â Sebastian said, rising to his feet as he gazed at her with a pointed stare. âIâll tell you my secret when you tell me yours.â
Annalisa blinked at him. âSecret? Sebastian, I donât know what youâre on about.â
Sebastian slipped past her to head inside the castle in search of someplace more secluded. âThen neither do I.â
He wasnât proud of his prickly behavior. It was reminiscent of his fifth year, when his obsession with curing Anneâs curse pushed him into a manic state, void of any logic. He wasnât that far gone now, but he certainly was allowing his emotions to control him.
Fine. If Ominis and Annalisa were so into writing silly little love letters, heâd do the same.
Sebastian retreated to his dormitory, where he was relieved to find himself alone. He sat at his desk with two blank sheets of parchment in front of him.
Ominis,
It has come to my attention that you have entered into a romantic partnership with Annalisa. To say that I feel betrayed and slighted is an understatement. I thought you were aware of my feelings regarding our mutual friend and would use better judgment. Itâs clear the two of you have chosen each other over me, so consider this my resignation from our friendship.
Sebastian E. Sallow
He snatched the parchment up and crushed it in his hand. This was meant to be a deeply personal declaration of deception and distress, not a polite invitation for afternoon tea.
He tried again.
OminisâÂ
I know your secret. Consider this the final fallen pillar of our friendship.
See you in hell, Sebastian
Much better. One down, one to go. But the second one wasnât as simple.Â
Sebastian was certain he could be romantic, right? Heâd been on his fair share of dates, had plenty of experience with girls. In truth, he had his pick of most girls at Hogwarts. Sure, he didnât have the family name and wealth that Ominis had to offer, but he had a bright future as an early acceptance into the Ministry of Magicâs Auror program. He was charming and intelligent, charismatic enough to sway most people he encountered to his side.
Surely he could pen one simple love letter. But for as silver-tongued as he was when it came to getting himself out of trouble or convincing his classmates to help him with various endeavors, Sebastian had no idea how to tell a girl he loved her.
He sat glued to that spot for a good hour until the reject pile of letters not good enough for Annalisaâs eyes had formed a small stack on the desktop. No words could convey what he felt for her. No words were pretty or poignant enough.Â
Annalisa,
I know youâre in love with Ominis and I donât want to stand in the way of the happiness you deserve. But if thereâs any chance I could ever compete for your heart, please know that I wonât go down without a fight.
Iâve loved you since that first day in Hecatâs class. I know I havenât made life easy on you, but loving youâs been the easiest thing Iâve ever done.Â
Tell me I have even the slightest shot at being yours and I promise youâll always have my full effort.
Forever yours, Sebastian
It wasnât good enough, but it was the best he could manage. He wasnât meant to craft eloquent prose like Annalisaâs favorite romance novels. Because this was real, not a fictional work intended to entertain the masses, and Sebastian wanted to be sure she knew that. This was his brutal honesty, raw and real.
He sighed as he decided these two letters would have to do. He pocketed Annalisaâs and placed the other on Ominisâ nightstand before slinking off to the kitchens to eat dinner in solitude.
By the time he was finished, his pocket watch indicated it was 6:30. Ominis and Annalisa would be heading off to their date soon, likely at some romantic restaurant where they could cozy up to one another away from prying eyes. Sebastian couldnât stand to picture it.
He had originally planned to send Annalisaâs letter via owl, but impulse control was never Sebastianâs strength. So in an act of desperation, he trekked up to Ravenclaw Tower and lingered outside the common room.
In a serendipitous act of fate, Samantha Dale was just returning from dinner.
âSamantha,â Sebastian breathed in relief. The Ravenclaw stopped in her tracks and lifted an eyebrow at him.
âSebastian? What are you doing here? Meeting Annalisa?â
âOh, er, yes. Except I was hoping to surprise her,â Sebastian said, hoping he was convincing.
âOoh, are you finally taking her on a date?â Samantha squealed. âItâs about time.â
âOh. Um, yeah, but itâs a surprise. Can you let me into the common room?â
âOf course, right this way.â Samantha led Sebastian inside and gestured toward the girlsâ dormitories. âPretty sure youâve been up here before, yes? You remember the way?â
Sebastian nodded and thanked Samantha, who continued into the common room. He strode hastily toward Annalisaâs dorm, praying sheâd still be there. He knocked gently and felt his stomach contort at the sound of her voice inviting the visitor inside.
âSebastian?â Annalisa blinked as he creaked the door open. âWhat the hell are you doing in here?â
Sebastian was more confused than her. She was wearing pajamas and she sat up in bed, cozied beneath the covers with a book open. She certainly did not appear to be preparing for a romantic date.
âWhat are you doing here?â Sebastian asked stupidly. Annalisa snorted.
âSebastian, I live here.â
âBut⌠you have a date.â
âI do? Thatâs news to me.â
Thatâs when Sebastian also realized there were no flowers on her nightstand. What was going on? Was this some sort of prank? A bizarre dream â perhaps an astral projection? He felt sick.
âBut⌠but you and OminisâŚâ
Annalisa tilted her head, perplexed by the entire interaction as her eyes narrowed in concern. âOminis? What does he have to do with this? Sebastian, what is going on? Youâve been acting so strange lately.â
âIâŚâ Sebastianâs entire frame deflated, his shoulders slumping forward and his knees threatening to buckle. âI donât know whatâs going on.â
Annalisa motioned for him to sit on the side of the bed. She watched him carefully as he did so, his hands resting atop his knees. He looked exhausted.Â
âWhatâs this date you were talking about?â Annalisa asked as she tossed her book aside.
Sebastian sighed. There was no recovering from this. Even if he wanted to get out of this, to sweet talk her with some excuse, he knew heâd only leave with despair in his heart. âI thought you and Ominis had a date,â he said.
Annalisa looked like heâd slapped her. âYouâre not serious.â
âI saw the letters. Your letters.â
âWhat letters?â
âThe ones you wrote to Ominis.â
Annalisa felt dizzy, which was alarming because she was certain Sebastian was the one whoâd gone loopy. âI didnât write Ominis any letters,â she said. âWhy would I? I see him every day. I donât need to write him.â
Sebastianâs chest constricted. A flush crept from his neck into his cheeks. His lungs screamed for air. He didnât understand.
âYouâre not dating Ominis?â
âWhat?!â
Oh no. Had he really gotten it all wrong? How? Heâd seen the letters with his own eyes. It all added up in his head. Had he really let himself spiral into an episode of assumptions and self-doubt?Â
âSebastian,â Annalisa continued, her voice a breath of laughter and perplexion. âWhat the fuck are you on about? Who told you I was dating Ominis?â
âNo one told me. I accidentally saw letters written to him â love letters.â
Annalisa was clearly intrigued, another indication that she had nothing to do with said letters. âLove letters? To Ominis? From whom? And what made you think they were from me?â
âI only saw two of them, but they were both signed by the initial A,â Sebastian explained. âAnd one of them talked about a date tonight.â
âWell, clearly it wasnât me,â Annalisa laughed. âThis book is my hot date for the night.â
âBut then, whoâŚâÂ
Annalisa giggled, her eyes glinting with a facetious, knowing smile. âSebastian, come on,â she said. âThink.â
âBut I donât-â
âAnne!â Annalisa continued.
âAnne?â
Sebastian froze as all the mental pieces shifted in his brain. Merlin. It made perfect sense â more sense than Ominis and Annalisa.
âYou mean Ominis and Anne are in love?â
âYes, silly,â Annalisa snorted. âAnyone with two eyes can see it.â
âBut Ominis has two eyes and canât s-â
âSebastian, thatâs beside the point.â
âRight, sorry. But⌠you knew? About them?â
âNot for sure,â Annalisa said. âBut itâs always been pretty obvious that those two love each other. They share everything and they really only trust each other⌠theyâd do anything for each other. Of course theyâre in love.â
âOh.â
Annalisa stared at him with exasperated eyes. âYou really thought Iâd date Ominis?â
âI mean, the two of you adore each other.â
âYes, because weâre great friends. Surely you know weâd never consider each other romantically.â
âI didnât think so, but then I saw those letters and⌠I just thought maybe Iâd overlooked something between you two,â Sebastian explained.
âWell, you thought wrong,â Annalisa said. âObviously Iâm not on a hot date with our mutual friend. I didnât have a date tonight, so Iâm enjoying a cozy night in.â
âOh.â
Annalisaâs brow furrowed as her gaze locked in on the folded parchment in Sebastianâs hand. âWhatâs that?â
Sebastian swallowed. There was no going back, he reminded himself. But this wasnât how he wanted to tell her. He wanted to woo her with melodic words and grand gestures symbolic of his feelings. He wanted to make a case for himself she couldnât refuse.
But if he had to convince her to love him, it wasnât the right kind of reciprocation anyway. Still, his nerves were getting the best of him.Â
âItâs nothing, spare bit of parchment,â he tried to say with a shrug. Annalisa shot him a look.Â
âWhat is it?â she demanded.Â
Sebastian frantically scanned his brain for the right words. He only had one shot at this. He had to get it right.Â
âItâs a letter.â
âOne of Anneâs letters to Ominis?â
âNo. A letter from me to you.â
Annalisa tilted her head quizzically. âWhat do you mean? Why? What does it say?â
Sebastian averted his gaze, his eyes on the parchment in his hands. âBefore I hand this to you, before I allow you to read it,â he started. âI want you to know that it was a result of a severe misunderstanding. When I thought you were in love with Ominis⌠I felt like I was going mental.â
âIs that why you stormed out of the Undercroft and have been sulking so much?â
âYes.â
âSebastian, why didnât you just say something to us?â
âBecause I thought you were trying to keep it a secret from me.â
âWhy would we do that?â
âTo avoid my wrath, apparently. Judging from the letters, it sounds like Anne wants me to know but Ominis is afraid to tell me.â
Annalisaâs lips curved in another knowing smile. âTo be fair, I canât say I blame him,â she said. âThis is your sister weâre talking about here.â
âI know, but if thereâs anyone I do trust to date my sister, itâs Ominis. Heâs the only person Iâd trust with her.â
âWell then, it sounds like you both have been making some inaccurate assumptions,â Annalisa mused.Â
âI suppose so.â Sebastian raked a hand through his hair. âLook, when I thought you and Ominis were together, I didnât handle it well, and Iâm sorry.â
âItâs alright, Sebastian,â Annalisa laughed. âI just donât understand why it had you so upset.â
âBecause I donât handle jealousy well,â Sebastian answered.
âJealousy? Sebastian, donât tell me youâre struggling to find a girlfriend. You-â
It was a good thing Sebastian was absolutely smitten with Annalisa, because for as brilliant as she truly was, she could be quite dense when it came to personal matters of the heart. âI thought Ominis had taken the only person Iâm interested in,â Sebastian cut in. He maintained his gaze on the parchment, terrified to watch as the understanding settled within Annalisa.Â
âSebastian,â she breathed.
âHere,â Sebastian said as he extended his arm to offer her the letter. âNow you can have this.â
Annalisa reached tentatively for the letter, as if she knew reading it would change everything. Sebastian didnât look as he listened to her unfold it. The room fell silent as her eyes scanned his penmanship. When he heard her inhale sharply, Sebastian considered flinging himself out the window.
He wasnât prepared for her reaction. He had long accepted the reality that she could never possibly love him mutually. She might love him as a close friend, but sheâd never understand the magnitude of her presence in his life. She was more than his shoulder to lean on and partner in crime; she was the gravity that grounded Sebastian to this world. If he lost her, heâd lose the anchor that kept the sea of dysphoria from sweeping him away again.
Sebastian decided heâd start by apologizing. Heâd tell her he never meant to jeopardize their bond. He hadnât even meant to fall for her. But he wasnât sorry for loving her. It was the most genuine emotion he had.Â
Then heâd assure Annalisa that their friendship didnât have to change. He was determined to maintain it. Heâd fight every one of his emotions tooth and nail for her. She had to understand that heâd never expect anything more from her than the privilege to merely be a part of her life.
âSebastian,â Annalisa breathed. He finally turned to look at her and was stunned to see tears welling in her eyes. âSebastian, why didnât you tell me?â
âItâs not really a casual topic for dinner discussion.â
âSebastian, really.â Annalisa sniffed. âYou should have told me.â
âIâm sorry.â Sebastian averted his gaze again, riddled by guilt and fear. He fiddled with a loose thread on the blanket while both seemed to be at a loss for words.
âSebastian,â Annalisa repeated. She slipped from beneath the covers to sit next to him. Sebastian fought desperately to think about anything other than the way her silk pajamas clung to her body. âSebastian, look at me.â
He exhaled slowly as he turned to face her, awaiting his fateful sentence. He assumed sheâd let him down gently, tell him they were better off as friends. She was far too kind to raise her voice at him, though she was also fiery enough that she might slap him.
Instead, she threw her arms around him. Sebastianâs lungs deflated as he stilled, stunned by her sudden embrace.Â
âSebastian, you fool. You know I love you too,â she mumbled, her words muffled against his neck. It ignited a new heat that coursed through his limbs. He swallowed as her words clashed with the feeling of her soft lips against his skin. It was a staggering juxtaposition of sweet relief and untamed desire.
She loved him? Had he really managed to overlook that major detail in his life? Had there been signs? Sebastian blinked in disbelief. He'd orchestrated his fair share of stupid events, but this one took first place.
Annalisa closed her eyes as she continued to cling to Sebastian. âYou really thought I was in love with Ominis?â
âOminis is brilliant,â Sebastian offered with a shrug. âGirls seem to like that whole polished and proper thing he has going on.â
Annalisa snorted against his neck and Sebastian couldnât help but smile in spite of his nerves. âSebastian, when have I ever been the prim and proper type?â she murmured. The more she spoke and the more her lips buzzed vibrations across his skin, the more Sebastian squirmed.
âThatâs true,â he answered, forcing his words until they sounded steady. âYou do seem to have a proclivity for chaos and dramatics.â
Annalisa drew away just far enough to peer upward at him with a pointed gaze. Her green eyes gleamed with coquetry. âItâs not like I go looking for chaos,â she huffed. âIt just seems to find me⌠sort of way you found me. Sometimes itâs good to attract chaos.â
âAre you calling me chaotic?â
âAre you denying it?â
Sebastian chuckled. âNo. Canât deny that.â
âSebastian?â
âYeah?â
âWhy are you so tense?â
âBecause I just confessed to being in love with you and now youâre pressed up against me.â
âSebastian?â
âYeah?â
âWhy havenât you kissed me yet?â
Oh. Oh.
âI⌠donât know.âÂ
Annalisa offered him a bemused smirk. âBoy, Seb, between that letter and all of this, you sure have a way with words,â she teased. âLucky for you, you won me over years ago.â
âYears?â
Annalisa rolled her eyes, her impatience evident. âYes, years,â she said matter-of-factly. âWhich is why you should have told me.â
âYou could have told me!â
âAnd ruin the absolute spectacle of you making a fool of yourself because of a couple love letters to Ominis? Never.â
That was enough talking, enough words for one day. Sebastian had spelled it all out, albeit rather awkwardly, but the swell inside his chest made it all worth it. He finally kissed her, which told her more than any stupid letter ever could.
Part II (Smut warning)
âSebastian,â Annalisa whimpered. âSebastian, please.â
Her hands were presently tangled in Sebastianâs hair as her legs were tossed over his shoulders.Â
Annalisa was quickly learning that Sebastian may not always have a way with words, but he was certainly skilled with his tongue. His letter to her lay on the floor, having fluttered off the bed amid the frenzy of hungry hands and greedy kisses.
âSebastian, donât stop,â Annalisa begged as his tongue pressed patterns over her clit. He hummed in response, certain heâd go mad by the way she begged him for more. Her whimpering pleas, the taste of her arousal and the aftermath of their declarations of love had Sebastian teetering on the edge of an insanity that could only be stoked by adoration.
Sebastianâs tongue traced tiny heart shapes across her clit until Annalisaâs thighs tensed and the pitch of her moans spiked. âOh fuck, Sebastian!â she cried as her nerve endings seared with pleasure. Her back arched off the bed and her fingers tugged at Sebastianâs hair until her orgasm subsided, leaving her chest heaving and her entrance soaked.
Sebastian, still stunned by the dayâs revelations, sat back on his heels to admire her. She wasnât in love with Ominis â his own sister was. But heâd wrap his mind around that part of the story later. The part that mattered now was Annalisa had been his the entire time, and she was eager to prove it to him. After he kissed her for that first time, she had practically climbed into his lap until they were tearing their clothes off.
Once she had caught her breath, Annalisa sat up to pull Sebastian into a long kiss. âStand up,â she ordered.Â
Sebastian blinked. He was enthralled by this bossy new side of her. Of course, one doesnât save the world from a goblin rebellion by being a timid pushover, but Sebastian hadnât anticipated this level of dominance from her. It made his cock twitch desperately.
He obliged and scrambled to his feet, holding his breath as he watched Annalisa fall to her knees on the floor in front of him. She took him into her mouth and tightened her lips around his shaft. Sebastian had to lean one hand on the back of her desk chair to support his weight. The suction pulling against his cock was dizzying.
âMy god,â he groaned as he gazed downward to watch her work. Her hands snaked their way to the backs of his thighs, fingers pressing into his flesh as she used only her mouth to make him moan.Â
Annalisaâs lips released their vice grip to make way for her tongue. She dragged it from the base of Sebastianâs cock upward, over and around the tip, leaving it slick with saliva. Sebastian whimpered at the sight of it.Â
âAnnalisa, please,â he begged. âLet me have you.â
Annalisa nodded in understanding and rose to her feet to pull Sebastian into a kiss. She nudged him backward to guide him toward the desk chair.Â
âSit,â she commanded. Sebastian obeyed and dropped into a seated position. Annalisa climbed over him, hands clutching his shoulders as she lowered herself. She held her breath, astounded that her quiet Valentineâs Day was ending in such a way. Much better than any of her romance novels.
Sebastianâs fingers dug into her waist as he felt his cock make contact with her entrance. He tensed as she sank slowly, a low whine escaping her throat as she stretched around him. âSebastian, youâre big,â she whimpered.
âTake it easy,â Sebastian said gently, though every nerve ending in his body was electrified. The scorching heat surrounding his cock was surreal.
Annalisa lifted herself and dipped downward again. The friction made both of their breaths hitch. Sebastian fought to control his bodyâs response while Annalisa found a steady pace, her cunt gliding over his cock until the room echoed with the sounds of their slick union.
âI love you,â Annalisa whispered, her eyes meeting Sebastianâs as she studied his expression to ensure he was content.Â
âI love you too,â Sebastian growled, his hands still pressing into her sides. He marveled at her; the way her full breasts bounced, her cheeks flushed, and her tight walls embraced him. He was desperate to feel her release. He had to know how sheâd feel when she collapsed on top of him, her thighs shaking and cunt swollen from the intrusion of his cock.
Annalisaâs eyes fell shut as she worked, her hips rising and grinding as she rested her palms flat against Sebastianâs chest. The chair creaked beneath them.Â
âYou feel so fucking good,â Sebastian breathed.
She rocked her hips and let out a sharp moan as Sebastianâs cock speared her soft, sensitive spot. âOh, right there,â she groaned. She repeated the motion, her teeth tugging at her bottom lip as she lost herself in the sensation stimulating her core. âSebastian, Iâm close.â
Poor Sebastian was hanging on for dear life. His mind was presently reviewing spell patterns heâd learned in Charms class to divert his attention. He didnât find himself in such a drastic dilemma very often, but this was pure desperation.
Annalisa slammed herself hard down onto him, driving the depths of her walls around Sebastianâs cock until she could feel the familiar flutters. She squeezed and rocked until her walls gave way to her climax, throbbing with relief as she wailed and threw her head back. She collapsed her full weight into Sebastianâs lap, allowing the tip of his cock to settle deep inside her until the final twitches of her cunt evoked his orgasm. He swore as he gripped her hips and spilled within her, earning one final moan from her.
The roomâs erotic echoes were replaced with their recovering breaths. Annalisa slumped against Sebastian, her body exhausted from bouncing on top of him, and her head hazy.
Sebastian was utterly spent. His forehead rested against Annalisaâs bare shoulder as the weight of the dayâs overwhelming epiphanies settled within him.
Things had taken a turn for the better; a monumental shift in events that he never could have predicted. He felt foolish and guilty for his presumptive behavior, but elated that, finally, for once, things had worked in his favor.
Annalisa was watching him with soft eyes. âAlright?â she asked. Sebastian grinned, his hands tracing light lines up and down the small of her back.
âAlright,â he answered. âJust⌠thinking about how mental this day was.â
âOnly because youâre mental,â Annalisa said as she climbed off him and began fetching her pajamas from the floor.
âSorry,â Sebastian said with a sheepish smile. âI guess I owe you and Ominis an apol-â He froze, his eyes widening until Annalisa drew back in alarm.
âWhat is it?â she demanded.
âOminis,â Sebastian said hastily as he scrambled to his feet and began redressing. âI- I wrote him a letter too. I have to go. I have to get rid of it before he sees it.â
âSurely it canât be that bad.â
Sebastian flashed her an apologetic grin as he buttoned his shirt. âI might have told him we were no longer friends and to go to hell.â
âSebastian!â
âIn my defense, it was all for you, love.â
âIt was downright foolish.â
âI know. Apologies, love. Iâll just go fetch and destroy it and then Iâll come right back, yeah?â
Annalisa sighed and crawled back into bed. âYes, alright. Iâll be here.âÂ
Sebastian pressed a kiss to her forehead and sprinted back to the Slytherin dungeons.
#mdni#sebastian sallow x oc#sebastian sallow fanfic#sebastian sallow fanfiction#sebastian sallow smut#hogwarts legacy#hogwarts legacy fanfic#hogwarts legacy fanfiction#sebastian sallow#whizzing fizzbee fanfic
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Valentine's Day Pt. 2 (MFLs)
See also: Valentine's Day 2024
Hey all!
Well, haven't been asked this year for a new Valentine's list, and since I didn't have a list ready this weekend, I decided to take it upon myself to throw together this list of fics from my Marked for Later offline list and post it for today!
As always, if you have a Valentine's fic you're writing or have read, PLEASE suggest it for the reblog! Enjoy!
Conversation Hearts by rsong912 (M, 1,382 w., 1 Ch. || POV Sherlock, Developing Relationship, Valentine's Day, One Shot, Bed Sharing, Fluff Without Plot, First Kiss) â This little one-shot is in honor of Valentine's Day and the boys. I got the idea by reading about the origin of those little conversation heart candies, once manufactured by Necco and now by Spangler Candy Co, which have apparently been in production with only a few years of a break since 1902. They usually have a theme every year, in addition to the classic hearts. I've used the prompt of the classic hearts to come up with the theme for this little fic: Will U B Mine?
Hope is sweet by Lock_John_Silver (T, 2,977 w., 1 Ch. || Post S4, Parentlock with Rosie, Valentineâs Day, Developing Relationship, Pet Names, Friends to Lovers, First Kiss, Classical Music, Idiots in Love, Endearments, POV Sherlock) - Sherlock wants to be more than Johnâs best friend. Has wanted it for ages, truth be told. So, when Molly comes up with an idea, that to some extent involves three year old Rosie, Sherlock doesnât hesitate.
Worth Its Weight by philalethia (E, 2,986 w., 1 Ch. || Sugar Daddy AU || PWP, Daddy Sherlock, Daddy Kink, Service Domination, Gift Giving, Unsafe Sex, Sex Toys) â âRemember,â John said, âwhen we talked about you not buying me extravagant things?â Basically: a little bit of Valentine's Day daddy kink. Part 2 of All the Rest 'Verse
The Importance of February 14th by cypress_tree (T, 3,156 w., 1 Ch. || Fluff, Humour, Valentineâs Day) â Sherlock was born on Valentine's Day. John doesn't know this and invites him out on a date. Sherlock assumes it's a birthday celebration and believes so right up until the moment John kisses him.
Dinner and a Murder by vintagelilacs (T, 4,210 w., 1 Ch. || Alternate First Meeting || Valentineâs Day, Online Dating, Mutual Pining, Confessions, Getting Together, POV John, Oblivious John) â Reluctant to spend Valentineâs Day alone, John joins a dating app only to realize heâs already living with the closest thing to a soulmate heâs ever going to get.
Love, In Five Acts by unicornpoe (T, 4,443 w. 1 Ch. || Teenlock AU || Valentine's Day, Ballet, Romance, Pining, Wooing, Gifts) â Somebody is wooing Sherlock Holmesâonly he doesn't think it's the person he wants it to be.
The Best Idea by SatanDrankMyCoffee (T, 7,252 w., 5 Ch. || Valentine's Day, Bubble Bath, Hair Washing, People-Watching, Anxiety, Domestic Fluff/Bliss, Texting) â Gift giving is something Sherlock is usually quite good at but when the parameters change, he becomes unsure of himself. Which gift idea is the best idea? Part 3 of A Year in Occasions
Daddy's Darling by distantstarlight (E, 7,747 w., 1 Ch. || PWP, Daddy Kink, Valentineâs Day, Smut, First Time) â Disguises are part of the package when you work as detectives, there was nothing new about that but one day Sherlock goes undercover with his best friend and they discover more than the answer to the crime.
Valentineâs Night Out by CarmillaCarmine (E, 10,120 w., 5 Ch. || ASiB Canon Divergence, Valentineâs Day, Established Relationship, Fluff and Smut, Breath Play, Butt Plugs, Deep Throating, Humour, Orgasm Delay / Denial, Anal Sex) â John and Sherlock have been invited to join their friends at a pub for Valentine's Day. Sherlock has plans to spice the evening up a bit. Part 4 of the The Johnlock Holidays and Celebrations Series
The Heart of the Matter by prettysailorsoldier (T, 13,427 w., 1 Ch. || Teenager AU || Secret Admirer, Secret Crush, Texting, Valentineâs Day, Fluff) â It's the annual Valentine's Week fundraiser, carnations, conversation hearts, and singing telegrams (oh my!) making their way around the school corridors, and Sherlock Holmes has quite happily never received any of them. So, when he gets a box of conversation hearts containing a message from a secret admirer, his first instinct is that it's an elaborate practical joke, but, as he and his mystery suitor begin texting, he starts to wonder if there might be something to this Valentine's Day lark after all. There is, however, the entirely unrelated problem of one John Watson to contend with before he can be sure. Part 3 of 221B Mine
Not this year by Imjohnlocked87 (E, 16,293 w., 4 Ch. || Alternate First Meeting || Friends to Lovers, Valentineâs Day, Fluff and Smut, Implied / Referenced Drug Use, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Food Sex, Wall Sex, Angst with Happy Ending) â One month after leaving the rehabilitation centre, when Donovan asks Sherlock if he will be alone on Valentine's Day this year too, he replies he will be spending it with someone special.The only problem is that this someone doesn't exist.Because who would want to have Valentine's date with Sherlock Holmes?Â
Quo Fata Vocant by prettysailorsoldier (E, 18,115 w., 1 Ch. || Unilock / Teenlock || Librarians, Bisexual John, Flirting, First Time, Tattoos, Valentineâs Day, Secret Admirer, Matchmaker) â Sherlock is enamored with one of the employees at the university library, wiling away hours of his days just to catch a glimpse of the dynamic John Watson: captain of the rugby team, event manager for the LGBT society, and third-year medical student. Of course, being only a first-year, it's unlikely John will ever notice him. At least, until fate (and a little well-intentioned meddling) intervenes.
#johnlock fic recs#fic rec sunday#valentine's day fics#my fic recs#fics to read#please send me list requests!#e-rated fics
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This is your monthly reminder that trans girl periods are probably definitely real.
"ow ow ow ow ow"
- Erika
Serious discussion of/essay on trans woman periods under the cut:
While transgender women experiencing period symptoms is not something that has been scientifically researched with any rigor as far as I'm aware, enough trans women report the phenomena that it can reasonably be assumed real. The interesting thing is there are competing theories as to the mechanism behind trans women periods, which are as follows:
1. An empathetic or otherwise psychosomatic response, as in a trans woman has periods because she knows other women do. I don't like this, but we'll get back to that
2. Confirmation bias of unrelated symptoms, usually gastrointestinal, calling anything that happens in the general area a period.
3. Hormonal cycle from taking estrogen makes the body attempt a period, even without a uterus, accounting for cramping, mood changes, and changes to breast texture.
I don't think 1 or 2 are especially good explanations on their own, and taken in a vacuum sort of reinforce a conclusion and stereotype that transgender women are faking it (1) or eat nothing but junk food (2). However, these two definitely aren't unprecedented as factors, as long as you accept that there is a hormonal component (3).
Considering two of the most common phenomena reported with periods generally, we can get a broader picture. First is the phenomena of women syncing their cycles; this itself sports conflicting research and is mostly anecdotally observed, just like trans women periods. Nonetheless it could provide a point towards the empathetic response theory that would be more than making it up, rather, whatever about an estrogen-dominant body that (allegedly) causes sync is also applicable to transgender women. Second, consider the phenomena of period cravings. This phenomena is much more established than sync, it's commonly accepted that women on their periods tend to crave foods high in carbs, sugar, and salt. In other words, junk food. In that light the "trans women have had diets and call it a period" claim is not entirely dismissible, but is actually flipped in the ordering. It's entirely likely that trans women having their period regardless end up eating junk food, and cast doubt on to the validity of their own periods as a result.
As for my own personal anecdotes, I experience a cycle that is at least somewhat consistent. I don't notice symptoms every month, but many months, and they usually follow the same "structure" so to speak:
First, for about half a day, I get really horny. I believe this would technically be pre-period or a hormonal analogue to ovulation, nonetheless, I take the opportunity to have some fun, as pretty much nothing compares to how good it feels during this time.
Next, I have the junk food cravings, granted, I'm someone who eats taco bell weekly so, this doesn't represent an especially large change of diet for me, it's there though and if I'm cooking I might end up making something like mashed potatoes.
Finally, for around three days after that, I get really bloated and have some "typical" period symptoms: pain in my abdomen, the bloating itself, sore breasts, and even period shits. This is where I am while writing this post and we'll, to reiterate, "ow ow ow ow ow."
To me, this is far to specific of a sequence of events to be fake, even if it's not strictly monthly, and trans women have factors like missing estrogen doses or the presence/lack of progesterone that could influence that timing away from perfectly routine. Ultimately I'm another anecdote in a sea of anecdotes but, I choose to believe trans girl periods are real and biologically based, and I hope I've made a compelling argument supporting that here. This blog is made possible by boredom and mania mutuals like you, thank you!
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Mitsukou Analysis: Red House Arc
Okay. God, I was not excited for this arcâŚ
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/d0f6eac850398ba3a71ee1bf701a80fb/dbab6c5088e1097b-13/s540x810/c174f802b88dfb27a865e2d2aa5ac4c1876ce598.jpg)
*motivational (platonic) KouNene*
Honestly, when I first read this scene I was quite surprised.
Isnât it sort of odd Kou isnât super affected by Mitsuba or even Hanakoâs disappearance?
Yashiro became a veritable shell of herself, and Akane fell into depression, so to have Kou as his usual smiling self was quite shocking to see.
Woah, woah, can⌠can we back up a bit Kou? Thatâs twice now youâve shown signs of contemplation of killing yourself for your ghost boy friend. (In my opinion, it should be ghost boyfriend, but ya know.)
Wow, so heâs actually considering this. I assumed Kou knew he probably couldnât die back in the picture perfect world, since itâs supposed to be picture perfect, but heâs genuinely thinking about it.
So. At this point in time, Kou doesnât know âwhether the old Mitsuba is really gone.â
Well, Kou, for better or for worse thatâs about to change. Which brings us to the next point of interest:
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/df848d7dd2594e9eac324ad5c7f531fa/dbab6c5088e1097b-84/s540x810/07e957b66d77bbf4c178d4fbf2901d77aef5ba65.jpg)
Right here. Kou has realized, for the first time in (Hanako or Tsukasaâs, I canât remember) words, âthe Mitsuba Sousuke that lived and died in this world is not here anymore.â
I think some subconscious part of Kouâs brain really believed Sousuke was still out there somewhere, and because he only met him very briefly as a human, and still quite shortly as a ghost, he never really processed the fact Sousuke had family that cared about him.
This is divulging into more theory territory than analysis, but why did Sousuke have a picture of the Red House?
His connections with it are nonexistent, and even No. 3 doesnât know it exists, and is only associated with it because of his relationship with Amane Yugi/Hanako.
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/a22ec151798b5bc44160c4395584a413/dbab6c5088e1097b-c0/s540x810/8b0eefa33a9a4c303899c7dda9d341d09c08feb3.jpg)
This is mostly just context for whatâs about to happen next. Aidairo has made it crystal clear the house appeals to your desires.
Ah yes, so of course Mitsuba shows up immediately afterwards, almost as if Aidairo are implying when you say âthink of your greatest desires,â Kouâs brain immediately thinks of Mitsuba.
Another interesting thing about these panels, and also the main reason I added it is that this is the first time weâve seen Kouâs desire to be needed, and be needed specifically by Mitsuba.
âI canât go on without you Minamoto-Kun. Youâre all I have.â
This is saying Kou wants Mitsuba to rely on him and only him, a fact that was already well-established, but confirmation is always nice.
Perhaps this is pulling from Kouâs desires of Hanako being âa run of the mill evil spiritâ so he would be easy to exorcise.
However, I believe this is more pulling from Kouâs⌠suicidal tendencies, and wanting to be with Mitsuba on the other shore.
It might actually be a combo of both.
Actually, this got me thinking for a while. Do Kou and Mitsuba trust each other? Kou certainly doesnât think so, but do we have examples of them showing mutual trust?
Welp, guys, thats another ding on the âare they a healthy relationshipâ perspective.
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âYou know you wanted me to say that.â
My sleep deprived brain cannot even begin to pick out why the hell Mitsuba would say that, but letâs try.
I have a vague feeling itâs because Kou wants Mitsuba to know that he wishes for Mitsuba to know he needs him to need Kou⌠but why?
Like I said, I am on not a lot of sleep and a lot of caffeine, so I canât really say. I might come back later with new ideas, but for now this is what you get. (Sorry!)
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/fbb76d0f63baf596035ce4b37fb06b86/dbab6c5088e1097b-18/s540x810/2d235f64a5e58ed11cc76127b4cf6019d9e48a05.jpg)
Kou wants closure from Mitsubaâs death, which is understandable. However, Kou, you might wanna organize your priorities, because a solution for Yashiroâs lifespan isnât even present, while Mitsuba comes up twice?
*ahem ahem*
đłď¸âđđłď¸âđđłď¸âđđłď¸âđđłď¸âđđłď¸âđđłď¸âđđłď¸âđđłď¸âđđłď¸âđđłď¸âđđłď¸âđđłď¸âđđłď¸âđđłď¸âđđłď¸âđ
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/bb03c855cbb523961352e081367d4a6f/dbab6c5088e1097b-e8/s540x810/5c170aaff3af280c2d39a0fcb17b9c6aaa90379e.jpg)
Wow. Real smooth Aidairo. Stopping Kou right before we get an answer as to why Mitsuba (both!) is there, while not being an actual desire.
Yes, I updated my oneshot book- all entries below <3
#jshk#toilet bound hanako kun#mitsukou#tbhk#tbhk manga#kou minamoto#jibaku shounen hanako kun#but why though#mitsuba sousuke#jibaku shonen hanako kun#jshk manga#kou minamoto x mitsuba sousuke
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BuckTommy Fluffebruary: Day 10
~Sleepy cuddles~
Tommy returned to the break room on the second night of his 72-hour shift. This was far from his first shift, and he was used to them, but this one felt especially tough. A few unforeseen circumstances had disrupted both his and Buckâs schedules, and now they hadnât shared a single day off together for several weeks.
All they managed to get were a few minutes for conversations when one of them was heading to their shift while the other was just returning.
With each passing day, the separation became harder. Tommy missed Evan terribly, and he knew the feeling was mutual, but there was nothing they could do about it. He also knew they would have to keep living on this schedule for a while longer, and that thought weighed heavily on his chest.
Tommy lay down on his bunk by the wall, hoping there wouldnât be another call for at least a couple of hours so he could get some rest - just a short nap where he wouldnât have to think about how difficult it was to fall asleep and wake up without feeling the warmth of his loved one beside him.
Buck parked the jeep near Station 217 and climbed out. He moved inside quietly, trying not to disturb anyone or draw attention to himself, when suddenly, he heard a familiar voice.
- Buckley? What are you doing here?!
It was Lucy, appearing out of nowhere and speaking way too loudly for nighttime, in his opinion.
- Shhh, be quiet! I donât need you waking up the whole team. - Buck hushed her carefully.
- You didnât answer my question. - Lucy whispered now, though she still looked extremely curious.
- Where is he? - Was all Buck responded with.
Lucy rolled her eyes and nodded toward the couches.
- In the break area. He just went there about 20 minutes ago.
Buck gave her a polite nod of thanks and walked in the indicated direction.
Lucy watched him leave and giggled. There was no way she wasnât teasing Kinard about this later.
Buck stepped inside the room, and his gaze immediately landed on the bunk by the wall, where Tommy was peacefully sleeping. The man was lying with his back to the entrance, and Buck could hear the steady rhythm of his breathing.
Buck quietly approached the bunk, slipping off his jacket and boots as he went. There was a little space left at the edge of the bed, so Buck carefully lowered himself down, slid under Tommyâs blanket, and gently moved closer, making sure not to wake his boyfriend.
Eventually, he even managed to wrap an arm around Tommyâs waist, pressing his chest against manâs back. Holding Tommy close, Buck closed his eyes and matched his breathing to his partnerâs.
For a while, Tommy remained still, but when he tried to turn over and felt an arm on his side and the warmth of another body behind him, he woke up with a start.
- What- ?!
- Baby, itâs me, donât worry. - Buck answered in a voice still hoarse from sleep.
- Evan? But⌠what are you doing here? - Tommy whispered in a groggy voice, his breath not cooperating after sleeping.
- Just finished my shift and decided to visit you. - Buck murmured into Tommyâs hair, sending light shivers across his skin. - I missed you too much.
Tommyâs heart skipped a beat. He felt the same way.
- But CapâŚ
- Bobby talked to your Captain - consider my visit approved. - Buck cut him off. - Weâre fine as long as I donât distract you from a call.
Tommy hadnât even realized he let out a happy sigh. He couldnât believe they finally had some time together.
In the darkness, Tommy found Buckâs hand and pressed it to his heart, pulling Evan even closer. Buck was more than happy to oblige.
They fell asleep peacefully, holding onto each other and listening to each otherâs breathing.
Tommy managed to steal a few precious hours wrapped up in Buckâs arms before the next call came.
He couldnât have felt better. @bucktommyfluffebruary â¤ď¸ď¸
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OK SO THIS ISN'T (STRICTLY) JINX AND SILCO RELATED (though you could prob find some threads) BUT THE CRANE WIVES ARE SO SO GOOD SO MORE TCW RECS IN GENERAL (they are generally so good for edits/animatics etc as well bc of all the different things the songs explore)
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(prob my fav song..? i love the atmosphere harmonies and instrumentation especially sm (+ clarinet supremacy))
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(that one is rlly good for mutually destructive dynamics in general:
I've grown a mouth so sharp and cruel It's all that I can give to you, my dear And when you come in quick to steal a kiss My teeth will only cut your lips, my dear
And I know that you mean so well But I am not a vessel for your good intent
I will only break your pretty things I will only wring you dry of everything But if you're fine with that You can be mine like that
and also like all their songs it's just so good)
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(basically a parent pov to scars, though i'm not sure it fits j + s (said as someone who has watched arcane but isn't super into the fandom/into analysing it though)
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(may be good for a lot of DT characters actually)
(third verse: I've gotten good at making up metaphors I've gotten good at stretching the truth out of shape And all these words are sweet and meaningless You can't trust a single thing I say
also the second verse has the line "i keep my closet free of skeletons/cause i'm much better at digging graves" which goes so hard)
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(just SO SO good in general)
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But I still hold out hope that maybe someday I'll be worth more than all the silence left in my way
Feed me promises, keep my heart well I'll sing you songs until the darkness does recede But if in the end I lose my voice Will you forget about your love for me?
(and the vocal harmonies in that are so so good)
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(I LOVE the word painting in this, the instrumentals echo what's going on so well)
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Even in my fantasy, I can't commit to believing That I'll get what I want, I'm afraid of what I want Even in my fantasy, I keep the car running In case I need to take off
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And that's just a few of their songs, literally every single one is amazing and has something new to say, the lyric writing is incredible and the instrumentation and vocal harmonies are always so good....
(+ other stuff good for Edits In General: Little Soldiers, Allies or Enemies, Red Clay, Time Will Change You, Queen of Nothing, Predator, Say It, and also. literally everything)
can y'all PLEASE give me song suggestions for Jinx and Silco's relationship I'm dying to make some amvs of them. Songs about loving but complicated father/daughter relationships, codependence, tender and beautiful with an undercurrent of darkness and tragedy, anything with those elements please I'm desperate
if you have a playlist please share that too! and NO SHIPPING
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as a staunch Charles supporter, I will love him through thick and thin. HOWEVER. the mere idea ofâŚRed Bull Charles makes me SICK TO MY STOMACH. everyone stop trying to manifest this!!!!!!
#I wholly believe there are good lestappen enjoyers.#I believe some of you are even my mutuals.#but I 1000% know with certainty that there are No Good Lestappen Enjoyers on the godforsaken app twitter#RED BULL CHARLES EDIT RACE SUIT I AM GOING TO VOMIT#PLEASE LORD NO.#god.#also like. yes theyâre friends ofc???#god theyâd be terrible teammates.#it would be shit awful and I honest to god believe we would witness brocedes 2.0#lestappies I assure you you donât want red bull Charles.#f1#Charles leclerc#my post
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time for what might actually be a controversial opinion in my corner of the mdzs fandom but, uh
i do actually think we should stay out of the canon jiang cheng tag đŹ like yes, itâs absurd to create a tag that includes the word âcanonâ in it for content that is largely just very bad faith fanon takes, but forget the pedantry of that for a second and just bear with me.
if iâm understanding the fandom history of this tag correctly, the canon jiang cheng crowd specifically started using it because fans of jc (rightfully!!) got on their case about constantly dropping their character hate and bad faith commentary in the general character tags
they have by and large been consistent about tagging their bizarre hateboner content with this tag. they are self-containing in an easily avoidable quarantine zone (which is more than the jgy antis ever bother to do)
aside from how people who like jiang cheng feel about a group of antis claiming that their tag is the âcanonâ one, realistically people who are looking for jc content are just going to type his name into the search bar and then explore the general tags first
iâm not a jc stan, but i do like him and categorically disagree with the cjc crowdâs assessment of his character. but like. i make a very big deal on this blog about not tagging character hate, or not tagging pointless character negativity that no one actually wants to see, or making use of known character-critical tags so that people can easily sort and filter what theyâre looking for on this site without forcing other people who are just minding their business in the general tags to see stuff that is just shitty and mean-spirited. it would be extremely rich of me to say those things and then turn around and not say something, or even encourage, my followers to cross that line. even for people who have been cunty at me and my friends in the past.
like honestly just⌠let them have their little enclosure where they can say their wrong things to each other, and leave them alone. the adults can just keep talking in the general jiang cheng tags.
#salty peak sect đ§#canât believe iâm saying this but i have noticed mutuals and followers of mine#doing some stuff that makes me personally pretty uncomfortable#esp given my recent experiences with online harassment and smear campaigns#i donât think anyone who i follow has crossed that specific line yet but like#if people have created a tag for themselves#even if you donât like what that tag is called#they are still using it to contain their shitty ideas and therefore NOT dropping the trash in the general tags#/points @ my pinned post#i donât check any tags that i think are critical of jgy for a reason#staying in your lane is literally a two way road issue#letâs not intentionally seek out head on collisions
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Crazy how the people accusing Palestinians of being scammers do fucking nothing else to help them! It's almost as if they're just looking for an excuse to be racist and ignore people suffering in a genocide :O
#and for the record. even if they are scams (which i do not believe)#id much rather be fooled by a scam than turn my back on someone in need#i have donated to some. not all im not rich. but the least i can do is share them#but even if you do have doubts the easiest fucking thing you can do is delete the ask#reporting accounts and making posts and reblogging shit about how it MUST be a scam (with most your information incorrect and racist)#youre going out of your way to hurt someone! whos likely in Palestine! fearing for their lives every fucking day!#god it makes me so angry!! who tf do you think you are?!#JUST DELETE THE ASK IF YOU DONT TRUST IT. GOD DAMN#lets face it. even if they werent asking for help on tumblr youd still find a way to dehumanise and attack them#btw im saying ''you'' but afaik none of my followers or mutuals are doing or saying this#i just saw reblogs on that badjokesbyjeff post and it got me so angry i had to rant
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worst thing about getting into bsd rn is my trusted sources telling me that the fanfic fucking sucks like ok WHAT am I supposed to do when I finish this then
#the main concern in my mind when watching smth is just the fanfiction it's true I will watch smth just for fanfic. suck it up#hella needs to write her dazai character study so I have smth good to read at the end of this WHAT DO YOU MEAN ALL THE FIC SUCKS#I gotta gauge how bad it is. I gotta ask her if it's bad cause SHE'S picky#(completely understandable as she's THE QUEEN of writing only things that he would absolutely fucking say)#or if it's like. completely unsalvageable. cause I tend to be more forgiving with fanon then some of my mutuals I think#I get annoyed with fanon but I have to bake in it first#I have to spend long months comparing and contrasting the most popular fics with my understanding of the characters#and my understanding of the characters also has to bake for months in analysis tumblr posts and shit#but like. immediately after finishing something? my range for what I'll believe he says is a lot wider#so I need to know if I can go in a fugue state week long garbage binge at the end of this or if the fics aren't even good enough for that#WHATS WORSE. WHAT'S WORSE. SHE SAID THE MAIN SHIPS ARE VERY NARINESESQUE#DO YOU KNOW HOW DEVASTATING IT IS TO KNOW SHE'D COMPARE THESE SHIPS TO NARINES. BUT THE FIC SUCKS???#I'm starved for narines I'm looking for substitutes AND THE BSD FIC SUCKS???
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very very personal, just insight into where im at w my family and things that bother me/have encouraged me to move out
"i know youre moving out so im just gonna say no ones kicking you out and if you feel like this is something you have to do then ok"
thanks! i know im not being kicked out! but yknow i kinda yet a weird vibe when your out of touch husband takes me to a cemetery to yell at me, tell me im just like my father/dont give my father "the time of day", and that im "mean to people who care about me" in front of his dead mother's grave in a poor attempt at guilting me out of speaking my mind. but no yeah thanks for stating the fucking obvious that im leaving on my own terms
#problems!#people seem to underestimate how quick i am to make moves#the job market is piss. cant believe yall two would blame me for being unemployed when all i do from rise to slumber is hound ppl for jobs#im not going to stay in a house where i will be 'scared straight'. that shit doesnt work on me. in fact it has the opposite effect#i respect yall even LESS now#and youre so so fucking lucky one of my goals for next year is to make things right with you it would be easy to cut you off forever#same way i did with my abusive transphobic dad.#my mom is someone i know can do better and can actually listen to reason instead of being stuck in her generation's mentality of#'x is easy if you just do y. you kids have it so easy the world is at your fingertips' blah blah fucking blah#i am autistic i do not keep jobs easily. i am trans jobs do not want me. i am black and perceived as a woman. every customer at all of my#past jobs thinks i am rude or mean or have an attitude when i do nothing but treat others the exact way i would want to be treated#customers dont like what i say? i stop talking. customers dont like when i dont talk? i talk to them. rinse repeat#like i know im the problem here but all of my problems circle back to my autism and the fact that because im not a supergenius or#someone whose special interest is capitalism i fail at every avenue i try to jam myself in.#but yeah no i need to work harder i need to be taken to a FUCKING CEMETERY and yelled at by YOUR HUSBAND for wanting to go to the bathroom#in front of his mothers grave. god rest her soul and yall know im no christian so i actually mean that shit#because in his mind all i want to do is smoke and party. when i smoke because i have fucking migraines and g to shows#(two out of three of them being free and for the purpose of their willingness to 'get me out of the house')#bc i like music and i like engaging w my scene. but no its all violent noise theres no actual purpose or activism behind moshing. nope#its just one big party right. im just wasting my time right. because i like sleepin on a couch every night with no doors to close. yep ok#anyway heres to me getting my meds getting the fuck out and being somewhat far from my scene now that im moving#hows that for smoking and partying all the time huh?#if any of yall read this i am so so sorry. bitching about my stepdad will become a thing i think#hes one of those bible thumpers that are totally boring and indifferent to differences around them and thinks my mom is just like him#in some ways? she is. but she is a people pleaser and will never take her wants or her feelings seriously#because she had the unfortunate upbringing in being brainwashed into thinking her feelings/wants are sinful#shoutout to my christian or catholic mutuals who are fucking normal and dont let some old fantasy novel control your life. peace#religion mention
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this might be a hot take... but if you care about disavowing media made by bad people out of fear of looking like a bad person yourself more than you care about actually doing good things... you might have your priorities (and your morals) screwed up a bit :/
(see my tags for more of my thoughts on this topic! please try to avoid making make bad-faith assumptions about what i mean!)
#melonposting#there is a good case for not wanting to associate with something on account of the creator being harmful. sure whatever#but people have talked at length about the sort of moral ocd that it promotes when that idea is fervently preached and enforced#i don't know about you but i think there's a big difference between#a) not wanting people to associate with something because the media itself spouts harmful rhetoric#and because its bigoted creator both benefits from people engaging with the books and is idolized by many of the books' fans#and b) not wanting people to vocally enjoy ANYTHING made by ANYONE who's held any harmful ideology at any point#because doing so 'inherently' supports and spreads those harmful ideologies#it's true that you cannot separate the art from the artist#but good people can make bad art and bad people can make good art. artistic talent is not inherently correlated with the artist's morals#the goodness/badness of a person CAN seep into the art they make. and it often does. and that can affect one's enjoyment of it#but even then there's nuance to be had on how to deal with it#like my hero academia for example. when i started watching it in middle school i didn't know how misogynistic it would be#of course i ended up seeing it in the show (and god it's so misogynistic)#and i ended up learning that the 'joke' sexual-harasser character is a self-insert for the creator#which of course i could never get behind. the creator is undeniably a horrible guy#at the same time though the show means a lot to me and i've gained a lot from watching it#i won't elaborate here on how but believe me it isn't superficial. if you want to ask me about it i'd be happy to share#i can hold both in my mind. the disgust and the enjoyment. i don't think those have to be mutually exclusive#of course not everyone is like that; you could immediately stop liking the show on discovering the gross stuff. and that's your prerogative#i don't know... i agree with the values behind avoiding media made by people known to have moral failings#and in some cases (like harry potter and jkr) i fully endorse the values and the practice. but such cases are very specific#but in most cases i fear the practice is misguided and unnuanced and ultimately unhelpful in fulfilling one's values#it is largely a philosophical matter: about how an individual regards their moral standing in the context of themselves and other people#which is important to discuss - especially in our globalized internet age! speaking of which feel free to disagree with me#if you want to have a civil discussion i'm more than open to it#but no matter how important this matter... there are way more important ones in the world. especially right now#calling out people who watch a youtuber who said something bigoted 5 years ago does little to stop that bigotry overall#just have good morals and practice them! support oppressed people! be thoughtful and understanding and compassionate!#callouts and dni lists rarely make for impactful advocacy!!!
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