#I am talking out of my hair it is unlikely that i'll ever do anything the fact that keeping count even exists is a bloody miracle

[nerevar-quote-and-star]

Dangerously close to plotting a real Skyrim/Lord of the Rings crossover for after Keeping Count because my secret desire for Leara/Glorfindel has reared its head again

Shhh Don't question it.

[islassour]

luke castellan x reader angst plsss

ofc. 🫡

you should've come over.

luke castellan x reader

you always thought of that day that luke had left camp to serve kronos. you thought that you would've changed his mind if you didn't have that argument over him sneaking out, you really, really regretted everything you'd said. did he regret it too? only the gods above would know.

it trailed back into your head everyday as you passed by the hermes cabin, it was a bit more quiet and less hyper-active as it was. you missed the sound of them messing around and their stupid pillow fights they'd have almost every day.

"do you understand how worried i was?!" you whisper-shouted as you walked along the forest trail. it was only a month ago now.

'you need to chill out," luke rolled his eyes. "i got back here just fine, it was a little bit of fun thats it."

"it might have been, but i was genuinely gonna freak and go ask connor where you were at, and i really do not like that kid." you stated bluntly.

"can't you just come over to my cabin and i'll make it up to you? please?" he pleaded, his tone etched with annoyance.

"unlike you, i don't break the camp rules." you mumbled, glancing at him softly. "we'll just talk about this tomorrow, besides the celebrations on for percy-"

"oh my fucking gods. percy this, percy that, can you please stop talking about this kid?" he groaned again as he stopped in his tracks.

"what has gotten into you recently?" you took a step towards him with a mixture of concern and anger on your expression. "you've been really strange ever since you came back from your quest and its killing me not knowing whats up with you."

"oh come on, are you really that paranoid on everything?" he grunted with his hand running through his hair. "just- just please act like your not upset with me, not tonight."

"what makes this so different to any other night?" you scoffed. "don't make up stupid excuses cause you know i'm right."

"just stop getting so worried!" he snapped, immediate regret on his expression. "shit- i'm sorry, i really am-"

"what the fuck is up your ass?!" you yelled as your arms flew into the air for a split second. "you know- ugh forget it. i'll speak to you in the morning."

"no come on, don't do this." he shook his head, taking your forearm into his hand as he tried to tug you back. "please i really am sorry."

"your apologies don't mean anything to me right now." you scowled, you could tell he meant it but you were angry and upset.

"please." he begged, he acted as if he wouldn't be here ever again.

"goodnight, luke, i will see you in the morning." you growled, the passive aggressive tone in your voice thick.

little did you know, it really was the last day he would step foot in camp. and your heart ached, to hear his soothing words and feel his kind hands again.

[yelenasdiary]

Heyyy♥️ I wanted to request Melina x fem!reader with prompt 48 from your prompt list?

48. kids falling asleep in the car on the way home and their parents don’t want to wake them up

Maybe they have like a family fun day and all the fluff. I know that this is probably not Melina coded but I want to be married to Rachel/Melina so this is all I have 🥲

Another Block?

Pairing: Melina Vostokoff x Fem! Reader

Summary: After a family day out, the girls, Yelena and Natasha are fast asleep in the back and just for a moment, everything seems perfectly normal.

Tiny Angst | Fluff | No Warnings | 0.9K |

AC: My first Melina request!!! I took a little spin on this; I hope that’s okay! Reader is Yelena and Natasha’s “parents”. No hate to Alexei, I love him lmao. I hope you enjoy this x 

A family outing with your little family wasn't at all a part of the mission you and Melina were directed to do but it did fall under the category of making the "pretend family" as Dreykov could call it, look real. You and Melina decided to take the girls to the Cedar Point Amusement Park for the day. Of course, at first, Natasha, the eldest wasn't too interested in the idea but Yelena couldn't hide her excitement. She requested her song, American Pie about five times before Melina had to convince her to listen to the radio for a little while. 

Once arriving at the theme park, you instantly saw the hidden excitement in Natasha's eyes as she looked up at one of the rollercoasters. A soft smile tugged at your lips before you felt Yelena excitedly pull at your jacket, "Come on Ma!" she smiled widely, showing you exactly how many of her adult teeth were beginning to come through. 

"Natasha are you ready?" you asked, looking at the young teen while Melina grabbed the backpacks out of the car. 

"Yeah, let's go" Natasha slightly rolled her eyes to prove to you and Melina that just going on a family outing wasn't going to change what she already knew. 

Given Yelena was only 6 years old, everything was new and exciting to her. Her jaw dropped at each new ride her eyes locked onto, at least for her this was a real and her little mind never gave it a second thought unlike Natasha who struggled to allow herself to enjoy days like these. 

"Yelena, no running off please!" Melina reminded the young girl who ran ahead, stopping at Melina's words. "But mom! I don't want to miss the good rides!" She turned on her heels, causing both you and Melina to chuckle. "You don't love, the park doesn't close until night" you smiled softly. Melina took a hold of Yelena's small hand and walked ahead, giving you a chance to talk to Natasha. 

"You know, today isn't about making this look real" you spoke as you walked alongside the teen with blue hair. "You say that but everything we do is too make us look like we're a real family and one day, I'll have to go back. What happens to Yelena when the time comes?" Natasha snapped as she looked up at you. 

Mission or not, it broke your heart to hear those words come from her mouth. Three years doesn't seem like a long time but within the time of being together as a four, your heart grew to love the girls as if they were your own, you see them as your own and nothing would ever change that, you just wish Natasha would see that.

"Things will be different, I promise" you replied, lying to her and you hated yourself for it. 

"How?" Natasha asked with the tiniest hint of hope in her voice. 

"Because, neither Melina or I will let anything happen you girls and I know you're having a hard time trying to see that, but I love you, Natasha. You're my daughter and no mission will change that" 

"But you can't promise that when I go back, that things will be okay" 

"I can and I am. Melina is a lot closer to Dreykov than I am, if you think she'll let him hurt you or Yelena in anyway, you don't know Melina well enough" you replied, seeing your words put the teen at ease. She smiled, "I love you too" Her words came to you in an almost whisper, but they warmed your heart. 

----

After hours of going on ride after ride, snack after snack and of course some shopping, it was time to head home. Yelena was coming off a sugar high and both you and Melina could tell how tired the girls were. After your talk with Nat, she let her guard down a little and allowed herself to enjoy the day as a normal 11-year-old. 

"Thank you for taking us" Nat smiled at both you and Melina as you all gathered at the car. 

"You're very welcome girls" Melina smiled, helping Yelena into her seat. You smiled back at Natasha, for the first time in a while she looked genuinely happy. 

The car ride home was rather quiet, everybody was too tired and achy to want much of a conversation but of course, Yelena asked if Mac n Cheese was on the menu for tonight's dinner. "I'm sure we can cook some up when we're home" you replied, looking at the 6-year-old through the review mirror. 

The radio played softly as Melina drove you all home, your hand resting gently in her free hand, her thumb stroking your knuckles with love as you watched passing vehicles through the window. "They both had a lot of fun today" Melina whispered when she saw both girls in the backseat asleep. "Natasha seemed to really enjoy herself as well" she added. 

"I'm really proud of her today and letting herself enjoy the day" you replied, looking over at Melina as she pulled up in the drive away. "Do we have to move them?" you asked in a whisper, looking over your shoulder. 

"Let's just do another block and see if they wake up, if not, we'll park in the garage and wake them when dinner is ready" Melina suggested, placing a soft kiss on your cheek. Moments like these made you both forget the meaning of everything, the red room, the mission, the widow program and most importantly, Dreykov. It was just you, your wife and the two young and beautiful girls you shared with her and as Melina took her time, driving another block with her free hand intertwined with yours, you forever wished things would never change.

[letmesleep8]

even if I die screaming // elliexreader

CHAPTER 5: Fortnight

AO3 | chapter 4

content warnings/tags: sex scene (not smut), subtle homophobia

notes: I promised I'd be back in no time! so here I am. I hope you enjoy it, have a great day/night/life!! sorry for not being really smutty, I know a bunch of people like it but I didn't feel comfortable.

taglist: @h4-rt3s @lorelaihehe @intothespidersweb @pinkinternetfire

•─────⋅☾ ☽⋅─────••─────⋅☾ ☽⋅─────••─────⋅☾ ☽⋅─────•

“What can I say to your mom to let you come outside?

You know I'll be seeking if you run and hide

If the door were to open, would you walk through the frame?

If you're too afraid, it won't be you I blame”

— Triple Dog Dare, Lucy Dacus

February 09, 2039 Winter

“I chose this single star

From out the wide night’s numbers —

Sue — forevermore!”

 When Emily Dickinson wrote for Sue, she knew what to say, she had touched her for much more than fifteen minutes. Though I will always have the chance to love Ellie, I won’t ever know what it’s like to have her. As long as I’m too scared to come off my shell, I will never know what it is like to own a Susan of my own. Must “be of itself a bliss” to hold such soft skin, to feel such callused fingers and to feel your heart burning. Must be of itself a bliss for intimacy to feel intimate and not invasive. 

•─────⋅☾ ☽⋅─────••─────⋅☾ ☽⋅─────••─────⋅☾ ☽⋅─────•

I hid my journal and went back to the kitchen, as usual. It’s been a few weeks since my mom last let me leave the house. The windows were also kept closed, it was my punishment for, as Mama said, “going against who I was.” She said I’ve been acting unlike me, and that her beautiful daughter would have never done such things. 

So I’ve been trying my best to be as close to the old me as possible so she can forgive. I know I’ve already lost Ellie, there’s no way she would want anything to do with me after all that went down on our first date. So my goal now is to  just go back to where I was before it all went down: my mom’s good graces. 

I finished brooming the kitchen and went for the cookies I left in the oven. “Aren’t you gonna grab some? They’ll be cold when you’re back.” I asked my mom. “I’m sure they’ll be fine”, she replied. She’s been going on patrol while I’m home. At first I thought she trusted me not to go outside but then I realized the door was simply locked anyway. I got her her bag and she walked out, placing a kiss on my forehead. 

As the door was locked again, I went to the bathroom for a shower. My face looked horrible, I looked undead. Dark circles that denounced loads of sleepless nights and messy hair that indicated many depressing mornings, both that differed from my always-put-together self. I decided to wash my face and brush my hair for once, also to eat something. After, I went back  to my room and my endless pile of poetry where I could find a bit of peace, some were even self written.

I heard some steps outside my room and I thought my mom may have forgotten something. I walked to the living room, still holding my book. I almost fell on my back when I saw Ellie climbing a window in the living room. 

“What the fuck are you doing?!” I gasped, walking up to her. 

“I- I picked the lock on the window.” She couldn’t contain the excitement on her face. “You’re alive.”

I restrained a smile. “Of course I’m alive. But not for long if my mom sees you here.”

She shook her head, still smiling. “No, no, no. Joel’s on patrol with her, he promised to keep her busy for at least two hours so we could talk.” I sat down on the sofa.

“Talk about what?” I started feeling nervous. I couldn’t keep eye contact with her. 

“We kissed. A lot. On the blanket. I liked it.” She corrected herself. “ We liked it. And then Dina told me about your mom and how she freaked out and held you hostage-”

“She is not holding me hostage.” I interrupted Ellie. “She is my mom.”

“Oh, so you’re going to tell me that you’re here stuck with the curtains closed for two weeks because you enjoy it?” She got me there. 

“I’m grounded. She didn’t like that I went out at night.” I tried to keep my confidence.

“She didn’t like that you went out or she didn’t like that you went out with me?” Ellie raised her eyebrow, sitting by my side.

“She didn’t like that I went out with you. That 's true.” I sighed. “She knows you’ve dated Cat, she’s just scared that I’m gonna end up…”

“Dating me too?” She smirked. “Damn, she thinks I’m that irresistible?” 

“That’s not funny at all, Ellie!” I scolded her. “She won’t ever let me see you again, I don’t even know when she’s gonna let me see anyone. And she doesn’t even know about the kiss. I can’t stand this anymore.”

Ellie looked down. “It must suck to be here on your own all day.” 

“What? No-” I shook my head. “No, I’m not worried about being here. I’m worried ‘cause I won’t ever see you! And I’ll never get to talk to you again, or to kiss you, or to-” I paused.

“You’re talking to me right now.” She looked deep into my eyes. I held my breath.

“Look,” I took her tattooed hand in mine. “I really wish I could do something, but I can’t. She’s my mom, I can’t disobey her like that and she will never let me hold you for as long as she is alive.” 

She squeezed my hand, a heartbroken but conformed look in her eyes. “Then at least let’s say goodbye in the right way. Just goodbye, and then I will leave you alone and you can go back to Mike and your mom and the life she wants you to live. But for tonight, let me just…” Her voice sounded weak, could it be possible that she would cry because of me?. “Let me just love you. For tonight.” She swallowed any insistent tears.

I knew what she meant. I wanted to pretend like I didn’t but I wasn’t clueless and, to be fair, I wanted it just as much as her. “Yeah. For tonight.” It came out almost like a whisper. She didn’t lose any seconds, instantly kissing my lips and grabbing my waist. I touched her neck and kissed her like it was the last time. Well, it was. 

She laid me down on the couch without breaking contact. Her hands went under my sweater, warming me up and making me forget about the cold winter. A  blizzard seemed to be forming up outside but, for me, that didn’t exist. There was no “outside”. The only thing that existed was this house, this couch and the burning Summer of Ellie’s body.   

I had sex with Ellie that night. She taught me things I didn’t know. Like how it feels like to explode inside of yourself, and how it feels to dewater your body onto someone else until you feel completely dry and senseless. 

She dug her nails deep into my skin. It felt like she was hoping to get a piece of me under her nails, just so she could take it home with her. I, too, behaved like an animal, like I needed it. Because I needed her. 

My only goal was to make this be remarkable, I want her to remember me forever. Is that selfish? I am selfish. But that’s fine, I think she is, too. The marks of her gentle biting into my neck and shoulders feel like tattoos on my skin, there to show possession. Maybe to mom, maybe to Mike. A way of saying “it doesn’t matter your position or title you may have, she is mine, mine, mine”, like a child writing their name in their favorite book at the library, or a teenager tagging their initials on their favorite spot. It may not belong to you, but it belongs with you, and she wanted everyone to know that.

We laid there in silence, staring at the ceiling, for a few minutes after we finished.

“Have you ever felt this way?” Ellie asked, gently caressing my arm.

“No. I didn’t know it could feel like this. Like, not hurt.” I replied. 

“What?” She looked at me, confused. “Mike hurts you?” She looked ready to fight when I put my hands on her chest. 

“No!” I chuckled. “Mike does not hurt me. I was talking about… being with someone. I didn’t know it could not feel like a chore, or a burden.”

She breathed in slowly, still staring at me. I thought maybe I had said something wrong, maybe I was too cheeky. I felt a knot on my throat. Oh my, I’ve ruined it all. That’s when she sat up straight on the couch. 

“I can’t let you live like this.” She started putting on her clothes. She threw my shirt to me. 

“What?!” I started getting dressed too, confused.

“I can’t let you live this. I can’t! I can’t. I can’t let you stay with your mom, I can’t let you marry Mike-” I interrupted her nervous ranting, “I am not marrying Mike.” 

She looked on the verge of tears, I’ve never seen her like that. “That is only a matter of time!” She stepped in closer to me. “Look, let’s- let’s just go away. I can hunt for our food, we’ll find an abandoned farm somewhere. Look, I- we’ll find a way. We’ll be together, that’s all that matters to me.” 

She looked dead serious. I am not the type to believe in fairytales, I knew we had little to no chance of survival,  but I am also not the type to live unhappily. And I would rather die than live a life without her. 

I started walking to a closet, she followed. I opened it with a key and, hidden behind boxes, I found the car battery my mom kept. I looked back at Ellie, she looked at me, too. We knew that the moment we took that off of its place there was no turning back. That moment I heard someone open the front door. 

I froze, thinking it could only be my mom. Too late, it’s over. That was until I saw Joel, covered in fresh blood.

“I am sorry. I wasn’t able to do anything.”

[juunobox]

──★ ˙ ̟ there really is no freedom here, is there? (nikolai gogol x gn! reader)

summary : TALKING ABOUT EXISTENTIAL CRISIS THE COMPLEXITIES OF BEING A HUMAN WITH NIKOLAI !!!!!!! HOW FUN!!!!!!!!!!! warnings : mentions of god,,, um,, nothing explicit i swear just existential crisis note : p short, and maybe absurd, my brain hasn't been braining for a while now. unlike my other fics, this one is written in 1st person pov

"Is this why you're always so theatrical, Nikolai?"

"Huh?" Nikolai turned to me, the juggling balls he'd been playing with falling to the floor.

"To mask those emotions deep inside you," I muttered, pulling up my knees to my chest.

Nikolai cocked his head to the side, his silence unbroken as he observed me. His grin then widened, and he closed the distance with dramatic, comically wide strides.

"Well, I guess I do!"

He crouched down before me.

"But you know what, dove? It never really works, if I'm being honest. No matter how much I laugh, make jokes, do magic tricks…"

Letting out a forced giggle, Nikolai held onto his temple and dramatically tossed his head back, bursting into laughter.

"Hahaha! No, no! It's not because I want to 'mask' those emotions, [y/n]! I just think if I suppress them well enough, I won't be able to feel them anymore one day. Then I'll finally be free!"

A grin spread across his lips as he flapped his arms; motioning a bird's wings. I let out a shallow laugh, shaking my head.

"Deep down, you do know that won't be the case, right, Kolya?"

His smile instantly faltered at what I just said.

"..."

For a moment, there was a lull in conversation.

"And why do you think so, dove?"

I had to swallow hard before I could respond with a nod.

"Sure, you technically won't feel anything, but boredom and numbness are still emotions in itself..." I buried my face in my arms, letting out a quiet sigh, "And I have a hunch that you're aware of that, Kolya. But, well, I'm just expressing my thoughts." I continued.

"You didn't need to remind me of that, [Y/N]..." Nikolai muttered out in a hushed voice, taking off his eyepatch and letting it drop to the ground. As it collided with the floor surface, I looked up, finding his gentle yet sorrowful smile.

"There really isn't any freedom, is there?" He said, lifting his hand towards the sky and splaying his fingers as though trying to reach something above. "I suppose we'll be trapped in here forever. We won't ever leave this warm, wet cage, for so long as we're alive."

I let the silence between us sink in for a moment.

"Being a human is so simple, yet so complicated, and so limiting, all at the same time."

A soft laugh emanated from Nikolai as he reached for a strand of my hair, idly twirling it between his gloved fingers. "Go on, dove," He coaxed, encouraging me to speak my mind even more.

"Well... and when people tell me 'your body is your own', it certainly doesn't feel like it. If it really is mine, then why does my emotions, drives and control everything that I do? If it really is mine and mine alone, why am I so controlled by my emotions? It should be the other way around, right?"

"Mhm mhm," the clown hummed, showing he was still listening.

"My emotions... they always feel... so out of control. And why am I driven by my own emotions in the first place? Is it because I'm human? Is it because an entity above me is controlling my emotions, some sort of God, perhaps?"

"..."

"Hahaha! Now, now, that's scary, [y/n]! I certainly would hate that!" Nikolai laughed out loud, the loudness startling me a bit.

"If God is really there, then this just means he can't save anyone." Nikolai's voice softened as he smiled and let go of my hair, his hand now gently cupping my cheek instead. "That's why, we need to find our own way to be free. Find the path to our freedom, in our own ways." he said earnestly.

"I will find a way to free us both," he added, "But for now... I just want to cherish your presence."

I looked at him with a soft smile and asked, "A long day, was it?"

Nikolai agreed with a nod, removing his hat before leaning against me. He slowly closed his eyes and gently took my hand, guiding it to ruffle his silvery locks. "Your touch is so comfortable, can I just take your hand away?" He suddenly spoke, his tone playful.

"I'm not letting you amputate me."

"Hehehehe!" Nikolai only giggled in response and continued to nuzzle against me. "I'm just kidding, dove!"

[thrandilf]

Checkmate

"Poof!" Aaravos giggled to himself, the lightness at sharp odds with the high stakes Viren felt bearing down on him more and more by the minute.

"Please."

Viren could plead for his life if he must. He looked at Aaravos's amused expression, reminiscent of a cat batting at yarn, while Viren felt his world diminishing, his breaths labeled with numbers. Hours. That was all he had.

Aaravos angled his head, still smiling. "Please what?"

They'd played this game before, of pushing and pulling, of choosing what angle to show to the mirror, of pretending Viren had ever had any power over the being before him. He'd been foolish, but desperate. He'd thought back then that he'd run out of options. Now, now he understood how it truly felt to be backed against a wall, to have death staring him in the face. Now he knew optionless.

Aaravos had won so completely that he held Viren’s remaining time like grains of sand to play with between his palms.

Viren was done playing.

"Aaravos, please." Viren was only a lavender projection, but he had no doubt he could sob if he must. "I'd do anything. Even if you have no fondness for me, please, for Claudia."

Aaravos raised his eyebrows. He leisurely paced around Viren, circling like a shark. His smirk was audible in his tone. "You speak like you're the dirt under my feet, yet you still stand."

He knew that cue.

Viren sank to his knees in defeat, head bowed. His heart pounded, he trembled too much to talk back, to protest.

Aaravos continued. "There. Now, do you truly know your place, or is it that we forgot your spine when reassembling you?" he mused.

The words tasted like dust. "You won, Aaravos. I- I know my place."

"Oh, I think you're starting to learn it, yes."

Aaravos crouched down. He reached his hand out and laid it on Viren's cheek. Somehow, he was able to sustain the physical touch. Viren's eyes widened as Aaravos tenderly raised Viren's gaze up to his, pure fear meeting smug control. Aaravos's hand drifted down like a caress until he reached Viren's neck. He closed his hand around Viren's throat.

"Please," Viren wheezed. "Aaravos, please, I'll do whatever you want. I never betrayed you. I did all you asked!" Viren's spirit broke, pressed between the ticking clock he felt in his bones and Aaravo's grip. He coughed on a sob, shaking so hard he was wondering if all of this was enough to have a panic attack on top of it all.

Aaravos leaned close. "So, you admit you are mine?" Aaravos murmured in his ear.

Chills ran through Viren. "Yes. Yes, I am. Aaravos."

Aaravos let Viren's neck go, instead stroking his hair as Viren gasped. He even pressed a kiss to the top of Viren's head.

"I am merciful, Viren, unlike our enemies." Aaravos smiled, voice still a purr. "You won't become my enemy, of course, so you have nothing to fear."

Viren barely managed to nod. Surrendered down to his free will, kept obedient even without the use of the strings Aaravos could pull on any time. How much of a life was this?

Aaravos stood upright, looming over Viren, eyes deceptively warm. "I'm so glad we understand each other."

[cam24fan]

Fanfic? Character study? I don't know. First thing I've written in quite a while though.

....

Dear Nanami,

Here I am again, writing letters I can never post. Unlike the ones addressed to Utena Tenjou, this letter will never reach its intended audience not beacuse I don't know where to send it, but rather as I doubt you would be too pleased with me knowing where you live. If you were to ever read this I know you'd find me pathetic, still clinging to the memories of people who have long since left me. How far your mighty brother has fallen! I used to mock the other duelists for their seemingly masochistic attachments, but now I wonder if even a little empathy would have left me with some semblance of friendship or family.

We used to have a family, do you remember? I'm not talking about the Kiryuus, but before. The four of us in a cramped, desolate apartment, with barely enough space to move or play without tripping over the countless bottles on the dirty floor. My earliest memory in that place is of the day you were born. You were such a tiny thing, barely bigger than my arm now. Perhaps it reflects on our guardians' negligence, that they entrusted the care of an extremely fragile and fussy creature to a boisterous 3-year-old boy, but I had learned by then to be careful with my toys. You were utterly mesmerized with me from the start, and I in turn was fascinated by you: your big wet eyes like those of an impressionable duckling and bald egg-head that soon cracked to reveal a luscious yolk of golden locks. I was envious, my own hair was chopped short suitable for a boy and it was a couple of years before I'd be made to grow it out. So, I would comb each strand of yours carefully, while narrating stories about a princess with magical hair (it was mostly from my own imagination, the books we owned were torn and incomplete). Eventually, I began encouraging you to repeat sentences back to me. "Brother" was the first word you learned to say, but by the time of our final conversation together you could barely choke it out.

The last time we spoke to each other was when you found out about our adoptive "father". I'll admit I found some petty satisfaction in your distress. "Serves her right," I thought. "Look at her begging and crying. She has realized how much she needs her brother to survive." It struck only years later that your pleas weren't for yourself, but for me. You asked me why I lied, why I continued to protect the head of the Kiryuu family even then, and I, intending to hurt, retorted that I wasn't spoilt like you, that I was thankful for the opportunities given to me through this transaction. It sounded more self-deprecating than anything and you accused me of sounding "robotic". Robotic? I didn't understand that. That word in my head was reserved for Anthy Himemiya, and her creepy soul-less smile, a mere facsimile of true affection. I wasn't like her; I couldn't be like her. She was an object at the mercy of her code, rewritten to suit the needs of whoever owned her at the time. I preferred to think of myself as an actor, selling a story to the audience, inciting emotions I never felt myself. I didn't once question whose script I was following.

The Prince protects the Princess. That is the universal law. We were neither, but I tried my best to pretend anyway. It's a bad habit of mine: making Faustian bargains with men I think I'm equal in power to. The first of those being "Leave my sister alone, and I'll do whatever you ask." Do you see why I began to resent you? I had sold my soul to preserve your innocence. Hate and love are two sides of the same coin and that decision was what finally flipped it for me. With the Kiryuus, my hair grew longer and yours wilder, but I had plenty to eat for the first time and months of respite in between when our "father" would leave for business. No, I was never "grateful" as I told you, but when I joined Ohtori, "Rich Heir To The Oldest Family In Japan" was a role I was glad to be casted in. Girls flocked to me, boys stared me with a mixture of jealousy and awe, and then came the letters. At first I was suspicious, even more so than the others, and perhaps that was what drew Akio's attention the most. I had no need for fairytales anymore, but what I did want was power. You told me once that you wanted to surpass me, surely you can understand that I wanted the same? I wanted to surpass who I was, the vulnerability I felt, the helplessness, the pain, all of it. For that I needed power, and I didn't care who I had to step on to get it.

Nanami, you and Saionji were never close, yet your recollections of our childhood are near identical, and vastly different from mine. You both think that there was a time when we were happy, before whatever event your brains' latched onto as the moment that changed everything. That was never the case, our whole lives have been those moments one after the after, that was just when you realized. The day I met Akio in person for the first time he asked about my family (he already knew everything, of course). I told him that we were a normal nuclear family, just like any other- a "father", "mother", "brother" and "sister". He asked if I was lonely, I said, "No, I have a friend here with me." Then, he asked if I loved any of the people I mentioned. Would a "normal" person have answered yes? No, a truly "normal" person would have been horrified to be questioned like this in the first place. But I wasn't "normal", and Akio knew that. I didn't love you. That so-called "love" between us did nothing to save me as a child, nor did it alleviate my pain in the slightest. The only logical conclusion, then, was that "love" was a construct designed for fools to fall into the traps of those much smarter than them (Do you remember Juri and her love that could never be realized? What about Miki? Kozue once told me, while drunk, that her brother didn't love her anymore now that she had been revealed to be a "witch", so she would keep sleeping with guys, hurting him more because his "love" didn't protect her either).

Yet, there was a part of me that couldn't wait for you to join Ohtori. A part of me that was thrilled whenever you acted like a heartbroken spouse catching her adulterous husband in the act. Not out of a sense of romance, that was another thing I made up to hurt you, but because (as I much as I loathe to admit both then and now) you were much more my Prince than I was ever yours. I didn't love you, Nanami, but I wanted your love to save me. The girls (and boys, sometimes, I don't know if you knew that) I would use to pass the time blended together in a swarm of "I Love You"s and "Do You Love Me?"s and "Why Didn't You Call Yesterday?"s, and there were times I was tired, so tired, of them. So I used up more, thinking there had to be some satisfaction in breaking them down, reducing them to desperate, dependant messes just like I'd been. You were the only one who could break that endless loop; you were the only one who tried. By then, however, I had been convinced that pure "love" didn't exist, it was just a farce. Then what was it that led you back to me? No matter how much I hurt you? Akio spoke of the stars, of providence and fate, of a pre-destined path that intertwined brothers and sisters for eternity, but I had never cared for any of his more fanciful ideas. I was practical: there was a sure pattern, one thing everyone I'd ever known had asked of me, indirectly or directly, and that was certainly what you wanted too. Akio and Anthy only confirmed my suspicions; I wasn't shocked when I found out, because to me that was the only answer that made sense (But that wasn't why Anthy stayed, was it? It was love, after all, and when she found someone who could love her back with the same selflessness, she left).

I did many terrible things back at Ohtori, as did many of our peers I'm sure. There are moments, even now, where I feel justified in some of my actions. On my worst days, I feel vindictive satisfaction. "They deserved it," I think, although I doubt I believe that even then. Most of all, however, I feel regret. Even though no amount of remorse could even attempt to piece back our broken relationship, allow me to wholeheartedly apologize for what I did to you that day, in that car. I wished I could take it back as soon as the moment I had uttered those words. Even when I realized something was terribly wrong, you weren't reacting according to the script, I doubled down, pretended it was something I wanted. Yet, my question to you was entirely honest. I truly was confused, Nanami, how messed up is that? It took me years, decades even, to begin to realize "what it was you wanted". Forgive me if I'm wrong, but in the end, wasn't it what anyone ever really wants?

"Love".

I lied, Nanami. Again. The truth is, deep down, even if I didn't comprehend it myself, I did love you.

I didn't love you then. But I think I love you now? Is that enough?

I never loved you. I wish I did. I truly, truly wish.

When I saw you standing long after your rose had been scattered, still angry, still determined, I knew that you were much stronger than I could ever be. I was jealous, yes, but also proud, although I had long since lost the right to be. I'm proud now. Long after Ohtori, and you're thriving. I watch every single one of your movies, even if I don't understand most of them (perhaps you are smarter than me, too). Sometimes, I take our daughter to see them with me. She enjoys them immensely. Her name is Nanami too, and I couldn't be prouder of her. She doesn't look anything like you, but I hope all those films she's seen since childhood influences her to be just as strong and intelligent. I hope I am able to give her the love I never gave you.

Your brother (because, in the end, you're still my sister), Touga.

....

[donniesbabygirl28]

tex being jealous after he suspects you have a crush on a rich guy in town... like he's not only angry but sad too cause he realizes he could never offer you what Mr. rich guy has to "offer" you --- headcanons please ;)

Oh me oh my. I LOVE THIS! GOLD STAR FOR YOU DARLING!

I hope you don't mind but I made the hcs where y'all are friends. (Fem reader, as I said in my last post that I was going to write mostly Fem reader because it's easier for me to write and it gives me more practice, instead of accidentally putting "She" instead of "They" or "He" because as I said, I'm used to writing Fem readers)

So let's get one thing out of the way.

You have been friends with Tex and Johnny since you moved schools, which was back in 3rd grade.

Johnny has always known about Tex's little "Crush" on you.

Tex thinks it's not obvious and thinks nobody can see it when he looks at you. And he also thinks it's just a "Small" crush.

But trust me, that boy has no idea that you have him wrapped around your little finger.

There is a boy in your class, he comes from a rich family and he's very friendly, you occasionally talk to him.

He VERY funny- well obviously not as funny as your two best friends. But funny enough to make you laugh.

All Tex could do was sit and watch as he made you smile and laugh. He was supposed to be the one making you smile. He loved your smile and he didn't want to share it with Big Dollars over there. He didn't crack a single joke during class.

Which did not go unnoticed by Johnny.

"Hey what's wrong buddy, you didn't make a fire today or anything." He said, leaning over his buddy's shoulder.

He looked towards you and "Mr. loverman", frowning as he wanted to cry.

He was angry, not at you. He could never be angry with you. But he was angry with your new rich friend and how much you liked him.

"Oh. Hey I'm sorry, man. Hey- it's alright though, she wouldn't leave us for him and you know it. Have some faith in our friend." He said, patting his back.

It was the end of school and he patiently waited on you by the class door.

You walked to him, along with Johnny, starting to walk with them.

You smiled at him, but he didn't smile back.

You looked at Johnny, as if asking him what was wrong with Tex.

"Thats all you, I'll see you chicks later." He said, walking off into the distance.

Your friend walked up behind you, scaring you before you started smiling.

"Hey Darling."

Tex almost snapped right there.

Tex always called you darling and he wasn't gonna watch some guy with big pockets come crashing in and calling you his sweet names.

The guy walked away and Tex looked at you.

"I thought you were MY darling" his voice cracked a little.

You just looked at him, your lips parted in shock at his little outburst.

"W-..What do you mean? Of course I am. Tex what is with you." You asked, rubbing his arm gently.

He just looked at you, eyes tearing up slightly.

After all, he has always been sensitive and never could keep his emotions covered up, unlike his brother.

And he felt ashamed.

All he could think about was how pathetic he felt, not being able to put beautiful diamonds and gold into your hands in just a snap.

He couldn't help but feel like he wasn't good enough and he wasn't ever gonna be yours.

"Well, I mean it's kinda obvious that I'm no match for Mr rich guy. If he makes you happy then it's okay."

He looked down at his feet, not wanting to meet your eyes.

He felt weak, not being able to give you anything you've ever wanted.

All he ever wanted to do was make you happy but Mr Big lots beat him to it.

"Tex.. Are you..jealous?" You smiled slightly.

His face turned a harsh red.

"No- Im not. I'm just..." He couldn't finish his own sentence.

"Texas." You said, throwing your arms around his neck.

His face is close to a red light.

"Has anyone ever told you about my little Crush on you?" You ask, smirking as you ran your hands through his hair.

"What?" He question, very shocked at your words.

"Texas McCormick. You are everything a lady could ever want. You're sweet, handsome. And I hope you know, that I have no interest what so ever in him." You said, finishing your sentence by pressing a kiss to him lips, which he kisses back immediately.

[theslvttysimp]

●MC with PCOS or Hormonal Imbalance●

Scenario: You are a MC with female anatomy who suffers from PCOS or a hormone imbalance. You have abnormal periods, painful cramps, and grow some facial hair. Here is how the brothers would respond!

TW: Facial hair on femine face, hormone imbalances, weight gain, food restriction

LuciferXmc, AsmoXmc, BeelXmc

As someone with hypothyroidism, I feel us hormonal imbalanced people need to be represented! We are beautiful,strong, and worthy of love! If you ever want to vent about the struggles of PCOS, hypo or hyperthyroidism, or any hormonal imbalance you may be struggling with I am all ears! Xoxo

ASMO

Went to go touch your face out of endearment, trying to give you a quick little kiss. You suddenly pulled your face away from his hands, you get embarrassed from people touching your face in fear they could feel some stubble.

He automatically looks so sad, how could you pull away from him? " Sweetiiiiieeee.... why did you pull away from me? Did I do something wrong baby?"

You admit that you don't like anyone touching your face because you're embarrassed about your facial stubble. You then explain you have PCOS and the struggles that come with it. He holds both of your hands and places them in his lap and rests his forehead on yours.

" My sweet darling.... You are absolutely beautiful in my eyes. I wouldn't want you any other way. I'm here to support you whenever you need."

He places both his hands on each of your ears, brings your head to his lips to gift you a soft kiss on your head. He wipes a little tear off you cheek and smiles gently at you."May I touch your beautiful face, my love?"

With your permission you allow him to touch your face. He doesn't go overboard , just places a soft hand on your cheek and smiles at you so lovingly. He looks deeply in to your eyes and gives you such a sincere, soft smile. " You are so beautiful, thank you for letting me touch yout face."

He takes his hands off your cheeks and looks at you for a minuet. " Don't tell anyone, but I actually have an insecurity as well."

Your eyes widen. What? Someone as beautiful as this demon, has an insecurity?

He pulls his sleeves up to show his arms. "Sometimes I think my arms look like noodles. Just so....thin! I try to lift weights with Beel from time to time, but I'm always so afraid to chip my nail polish!" He says with a slightly chuckle. " I guess I'll always have noodles for arms."

You smile at him. It was unlike him to share an insecurity and you really appreciate him being so honest with you to make you feel better. You both hug each other for a while, just enjoying each other's vulnerability.

If you're okay with it, he'll help you wax your lip and chin, following by using the best creams he has to take care of your beautiful skin. When you have painful cramps, hell hold you in his lap with a warm compress on your pelvis. He'll set reminders o his phone to make sure you take your hormonal medication so you don't ever forget.

Makes it a point to call you beautiful all the time ( like he didn't already). He doesn't do this out of pity, but because he genuinely believes you are so gorgeous. He doesnt want you to EVER think you are anything other than beautiful.

Beel

You were chowing down on some nachos with Beel when he noticed you were eating less than usual. Why are you counting chips? Why are you taking the most dry, naked chips out of the plate of nachos?

"Mc, why aren't you eating much? I know you didn't eat lunch today. Are you not feeling well?" He looks at you concerned. He places the back of his palm to your forehead, checking to see if you have a fever in fear you're not feeling well.

You mention that it's easy for you to gain weight due to your hormone imbalance. You gained a few pounds during the week and you don't want to gain anymore. You confide in him that you have always been insecure about your weight so you really try to watch what you eat sometimes. Just talking about this is making your eyes well up. You never really spoke about this to anyone and it's making you emotional l.

This demon is looking like a sad puppy. How could MC be insecure? They're stunning! Beel abruptly stands up, picks you up like nothing, holds you bridal style and looks you dead in the eyes after wiping away a teat off your face.

" I don't like..... I don't like that you feel like you have to restrict yourself just to feel pretty. You.... you are pretty..... the prettiest thing I've ever seen..."

He is hesitant at first, but while holding you bridal style he kisses you. It's the softest, most passionate kiss you've ever experienced.

He sits back in his chair and places you on his lap. You're both facing forward and he rests his head on your shoulder, rubbing your tummy softly. " I love your tummy, MC. I think it's so yummy! You know.... if I wasn't a demon, I would have a HUGE tummy!"

You giggle at his little joke knowing that what he said was true. He smiles after hearing you giggle, relieved he could make you feel at least a little better.

When he notices you staring at the mirror analyzing your body a little too long, hell go as far as to take the mirror away from you. He NEVER wants you to think low of yourself.

He makes sure you never skip a meal ever again. Even if that means he has to go hungry for a little bit, he'll make sure you eat first.

On really bad days when you imbalance is really fucking with you to the point you feel icky, hell sit you on his lap and rub your tummy. He'll give you every ounce of love that demon has in his body just so you feel loved and beautiful.

Lucifer

He was discussing the next vacation day with you and the brothers at the dinner table, deciding where you will all go. The brothers all agreed to go to the beach! Lucifed noticed you were awfully quiet on the subject, having a hint of nervousness in your face.

Once dinner was done, he walked beside you and rest his hand on your shoulder and bent his head down to your ear. " Come to my study in 10 minuets. I want to discuss something with you."

10 minuets later you are in his study sitting in the chair across the desk. He is doing his usual paperwork while speaking to you. " You didn't seem to be to pleased on the fact we're going to the beach next week. Is there a reason why, MC?"

You fiddle with hem of your shirt " I just..... I have a hormone imbalance which makes me a little more.....plump.... than a lot of woman. I don't feel confident in a swimsuit. I..... I also feel more comfortable wearing makeup to hide....." You get nervous and trail off in to silence. You can feel your eyes welling up.

As soon as you said you didn't feel confident he stopped writing and had all his attention on you. His gaze was soft, yet sadden. He felt his heart shatter in to a million pieces seeing your eyes get glassy.

" To hide what, MC?" His voice is gentle, but he wants you to release what you have pent up.

" I... grow a little facial hair which sometimes causes breakouts... so I hide it with makeup. Y-you can't wear makeup at the beach....." You quickly wipe a tear away from your cheek.

"Mc, look at me." He leans over the table and uses one finger to lift your chin up so you can look at him.

" I understand you may not be happy with how you look at times. But I assure you, there is nothing to be insecure about." He let's his word sink in for a moment before taking your hands and guiding you to his side of the table. He has you sit in his lap.

You lays your head on his chest and wraps his arms around you. " In all of the realms I've lived in, out of all the angels, devils, and humans I've seen.... you are by far the most beautiful being I have laid my eyes upon." He's stroking your hair out of your face and wipes away a stray tear. He lifts your head up to his and kisses you lovingly.

" I don't ever want you to hide who you are naturally. I promise with or without makeup, in or out of a bathingsuit I will find you breathtaking."

He goes with you to shop for a bathsuit you feel comfortable in, being so supportive the whole time. When he finally sees your face without makeup, he has the biggest grin on his face. You are beautiful, just like he knew you would be.

He never comments on noticeable facial stubble. It doesn't bother him one bit, and still finds you as irresistible as ever.

Makes it a point to compliment you on days where you finally decided you didn't need to wear makeup. His hear explodes with joy knowing that you are starting to feel as beautiful as he sees you. He is so proud.

[k1rameki]

THE TIME HAS COME EVERYONE. ITS TIME TO TALK ABOUT MY EXTENSIVE LIST OF TABI HEADCANONS (hcs are under the cut plus this also counts as a little debrief of his human design bc jesus christ i put so much effort into making this man's design it went through a LOT of trial and error before settling on what i got now considering ive gradually made him less and less "human")

also quick thing b4 i proceed – please please PLEASE ask before making things w my tabi design bc ive seen a rlly cool papercraft made w/o my knowledge and that was kinda sucky so ya thats around it (other than the basics of no nsfw and such)

APPEARANCE HCS

first and foremost — hes half japanese because i remember his aside counterpart being japanese iirc and i thought that was really cool and wanted to implement that into my own little hc (also he speaks like a dozen languages bc of another thing i'll go into detail with in a bit

so many different facial features, scarring (theres a very elaborate reason for this tbh), moles, freckles, etc all bc why not?? (freckles is primarily bc of my bestie crow and now im obsessed)

lashes bc why not, give every man a pair of lashes i think theyre pretty

PIERCINGS. so many piercings. this is primarily because i am a very firm believer that tabi gets piercings done because he wants to feel human again so he finds comfort in decorating himself as much as possible for that reason and also the aesthetic

broken horn bc of the mod events, damage beyond repair and whatnot

HE HAS LONG HAIR BC I SAID SO ‼️‼️ i figured considering he's been invisible for so long he never really knew what to do when it came to cutting his hair, so eventually it grew out to around his waist, and he kept that hairstyle ever since (he prefers wearing his hair in a ponytail or smth bc sensory issues when it comes to hair touching his skin)

a lot of tater's hcs infected my brain hehehehehe especially the tail and his hands still being what they were when they were cursed (also. paw beans. /vpos)

HES TRANS ‼️‼️ hes also very dumb and has very little regard for his health and forgets to take his binder off a lot (trust me he gets scolded a lot for that)

GENERAL HCS

hes autistic and has adhd — the autism hc i lowkey stole from crow but the adhd hc ive had for a long long while now — one of his lifelong special interests is performing arts and musicals

chronic insomniac — sleep? never heard of her

plays like 5 different instruments but primarily specialises in piano and guitar

safe food is anything sweet or chocolatey — he has a massive sweet tooth and is obsessed w cookies and pastries in particular which ayana baked for him a lot (ill prolly make a whole other post for her in the near future but guys. pastry chef aya. hear me out)

an absolute boss at board games, especially monopoly, and he constantly loves screwing everyone over

extremely hyperfixated on pokemon and owns a bajillion folders filled with cards worth a buttload of money, and a dozen plushies + figurines (projecting bc pokemon is one of my hyperfixes dont judge me) his fav gen is absolutely johto

his eyesight is pretty bad but like. not bad enough for him to be needing glasses (unlike a certain someone cough cough agoti)

speaking of said certain someone, he and agoti do each other's hair a lot simply because its really fun and provides some stimulation, and also because it helps tabi practice with self care and such

VERY SENSITIVE TO SOUND AND TEXTURES, often times he will probably start crying if something sounds or feels wrong

sometimes he forgets certain words in english and has to resort to using what theyre called in russian

has the goofiest sounding laugh ever and i will die on this hill. when you get tabi cackling he will start rolling on the floor and making the most UNGODLY sounds

can speak like 6 languages fluently and a dozen others in simple conversation (NERD ALERT)

he sucks so hard at writing essays but is (for some reason) really good at maths

despite being the more serious one among his group of friends, tabis a dumbass and does a lot more stupid things than one would expect

[mcflymemes]

THE HANGOVER PROMPTS *  assorted dialogue from the 2009 film

it says here we should work in teams.

why don't we remember a goddamn thing from last night?

you're in for a real treat today.

i see guys like you in here every fucking day.

you found the car?

i just wish your friends were as mature as you.

i'm thinking about getting my bartender's license.

you're such a bad person.

you're actually gonna wear that, or are you just fucking with me?

by the way, we're all gonna die.

at least our trip wasn't a total loss.

hey, what's that on your arm?

would you shut up and drive before any of these nerds asks me another question?

this does not seem fair.

do i have any volunteers?

watch it, pervert!

that's not a purse. that's a satchel!

we had a great fucking time.

you're not really wearing that, are you?

we all do dumb shit when we're all fucked up.

why are you peppering the steak?

no chance. cash only.

what the fuck happened last night?

am i missing a tooth?

who does shit like that?

we're not even going to be in the room.

you just have to get to know them better.

this is my favorite part coming up now.

we don't want to call attention to ourselves.

you guys ready to let the dogs out?

it's no big deal.

we call this place "loserville."

you cool with that?

it's where i keep all my things.

trust me, it's not worth the fight.

your language is offensive.

don't let the beard fool you. he's a child.

what're you talking about?

indiana jones wears one.

you are a fucking moron.

you're an idiot.

where the hell are you? i'm freaking out.

let's go, handsome.

i don't think you should be doing too much gambling tonight.

it hurts too much.

i'm not cool with that.

now, it's real simple.

whatever happens tonight, i will never, ever, ever speak a word of it.

listen... uh. we fucked up.

are you sure you're qualified to be taking care of the baby?

who said anything about gambling?

pull yourself together, bro.

suck my dick.

all you got to do is point, aim, and shoot.

why would you go to las vegas?

you don't know for sure?

things got out of control.

i should have been a fucking cop.

seriously. i don't care what happens. i don't care if we kill someone.

i feel weird having to ask you twice.

can i ask you another question?

it's at the corner of get a map and fuck off.

you can do this. just focus.

that's not what you do.

i'm pretty sure that's illegal.

we're getting married in five hours.

if it's what i think it is, it's a big fucking mistake.

i can't afford to lose somebody close to me again.

this isn't the real caesar's palace is it?

i keep forgetting about the goddamn tiger.

it's not gambling when you know you're gonna win.

it's not illegal.

whose fucking baby is that?

you heard me!

i'm on your side!

yeah... that's not gonna happen.

i'm sick of doing what you want me to do all the time.

i shouldn't be here.

where'd you get that cop car from?

boy, you've got a sweet ride there.

don't listen to this maniac.

we're shit out of luck.

how's my hair?

it was a real pleasure meeting you.

what if he got out?

you are literally too stupid to insult.

there's a phone in your room.

oh, how cute.

do me a favor. don't text me. it's gay.

whatever this is ain't working for me.

you might not know this, but i consider myself a bit of a loner.

wait a second. could it be?

i stand corrected.

are you nuts?

i don't know you. you do not exist.

would you please put some pants on?

i hate godzilla! i hate him too!

that was once, and i was out of line.

this isn't your fault.

i'll get you some pants.

remember, what happens in vegas stays in vegas.

right in the nuts!

don't touch it. don't even look at it.

i say we delete it right now.

did you have to park so close?

i met you like four times.

that was beautiful! well done!

i'll hit an old man in public.

i want to find out how i went to the hospital.

we're going to be okay.

that's highly unlikely.

[bebobeboben]

Hi! @ligiawrites, I'm the anon who asked about the story a few days ago. sorry it's taken so long I got shy and didn't want to post it😭😭

(disclaimer: I haven't played the game in a while so forgive me for any ooc behaviour and/or canon divergence)

.·:*¨༺ ༻¨*:·.

“We cannot be together, My Liege. You are to be King, and I am nothing more than a Knight from a simple bourgeoisie. I am your servant.”

“But Adicia...”

“Mathias.”

He looks shocked. Why won't he understand what I'm saying is for his own good. A King and a Knight...

We would have never worked.

“We may have spent a night together all those years ago, yes, but that does not mean my feelings for you now are the same as then.”

I step forward and peered into his eyes when I realised, he was drunk.

His face was flushed; his pupils blown. All the emotions he had bottled up had spilt. I should've realised; we had done so well in avoiding talking about this, it was obvious that one of us would be inebriated when we finally had this conversation.

It mattered not what I said from here on out, it would all be forgotten. Hazy memories from a drunken dream. He would not believe it real, even if I had mentioned it. He has had plenty of dreams about me, he had told me as such.

I reached out to cup his face with one of my hands. He relaxed at my touch, much unlike how he reacts without the help of alcohol,

“I care for you, Mathias. I really do. But we can't ever be together. As I said before, you are the next King. You're to be coronated tomorrow. Neither of us need the consequences of a relationship at mind. What would the nobles of high society think? What would your mother think?”

He looks uncertain. He stays quiet, in the dark I'm not sure if he’s fallen asleep in my hands or merely contemplating what I've said .

“Mathias.”

“I, I don't care what the nobles think. Or what mother thinks! I love you Adicia! More than anything. A world without being with you is not a world worth living for.”

I've noticed that on the occasions he gets drunk, he always has a flare for theatrics.

“I'll always be with you Mathias, just... not in the sense you're hoping. One day you will be betrothed to someone beautiful, someone who can help you rule, and you'll forget all about the feelings you have for me. You and I will simply be a fleeting memory.”

“I could never forget you Adicia. I'll find a way for us to be together. Just wait. When I'm King nobody will dare to say a word against me.”

I smile, whenever he puts his mind to something, it's always been hard to sway him.

We draw closer the fire crackling being the only sound in the room apart from our breathing. He puts his hands on my waist and pulls me flush against him. My heavy metal armour pressing against the soft fabric of his clothes. I wonder if it hurts. The hand I left on his cheek moves upwards and becomes entangled in his long hair. He moves his face forward just centimetres away from mine and I can feel his breath on my face. He draws closer still. I wonder if he understands the complications of what would happen if people found out about this. About us.

And even with all the protesting I had done earlier, I wished for this with every fibre of my being.

Our lips finally touch, and its soft.

So soft, I could barely feel it against my lips. I want more. I want to kiss him harder, to replicate that night, all those years ago.

But we can’t. I pull away from him. He’s confused. A sad smile plays at my lips.

“Good night, Mathias,” I tuck a strand of hair behind his ear, “You need to be well rested for tomorrow.”

With that I turn and head for the hidden door leading to my chambers. The last thing I see before heading into my room his is face. A mixture of hurt, and betrayal. It seems he thought our feelings were mutual. That we would both do anything for us to be together.

I stare at him for a moment before fixing my expression into the one I always wear around him. One of indifference. As if I don't care about him. When it's in fact the opposite. Once again, he looks shocked.

I finally head into my chambers and close the door. How I feel about him now doesn't matter. Because tomorrow we will go back to playing our roles. His, the Crown Prince of Opala, and mine, the outcast knight.

Tomorrow we will act as though this never happened. We will act as though we didn’t confess our love. Act as though we didn't kiss. As though we never shared a night together. As though the feelings between us don't exist. Just as we had always done.

But can we keep it up much longer? He knows now that I truly love him too. But will he act on it, is the question. He knows he is to be King, and he knows what the consequences of our relationship would be.

Before we were King and Knight, we were Prince and Whipping boy.

Whipping boy. It mattered not that I was a woman. I wasn’t a proper noble by anyone’s standards.

To be in a relationship with him would cause this country’s faith in him to crumble. It was already weak, given that we had only just won the war against Topazio by the skin of our teeth.

A King with a country that didn’t love him? I would not let that happen. I had promised the Queen after all. But I had also promised her that I would remember one thing; to keep the boundaries between me and Mathias in place. After all she had done for me, how could I refuse? She knew of our feelings and yet she said that anyway.

If it was for the sake of my Kingdom, I would do anything. But it makes me wonder, for the sake of Mathias, what wouldn’t I do? This is why I will close my heart off. To him, to the Queen, to everyone. Closing my heart to him is the only way Mathias can grow into a good King for his country. I would only hinder him.

Perhaps once he becomes King, I will leave. My current status could never make up for my sins. Knight Valência would make a better Dragon Commander than I. A better bodyguard too.

I can hear thumps and crashes coming from Mathias’s room. He is either being attacked, or, in his drunken state, fumbling around in the dark. It makes me smile, to think of My Prince stumbling in the dark like a fool. It all stops, and soft snores begin to be heard.

Waiting a few moments to confirm he is asleep; I begin to remove the heavy armour. Placing it on its wooden stand. It feels as though a literal weight is being lifted off my shoulders. Although the real weight I carry will never be lifted. I place my sword beside my bedside and climb into bed. It would take a while for sleep to truly set in. I must not allow my feelings to take control of me, as they just had. It could jeopardise the safety of My Liege and those surrounding us.

I dream again that night, one of many. I dream of Mathias, of what we are and what we could’ve been. I dream of my family, something I had not done in a long time. I dream of Mandra- Mandreis. Of what happened that day. How they reacted to what happened, and how I wish I did things differently.

There were many things as to which I was uncertain after our confrontation, but there was one thing I was certain for: no matter what, I would do what was necessary for my country and My Prince- no, My King. Whether it be staying with him for the rest of my days or leaving without a trace.

Before myself, My Liege would always come first. Which is why we can never be together.

I close my eyes and once again succumb to sleep's warm embrace.

[musical-chick-13]

who is your favorite iteration of the doctor to be shipped with river?

I thought a lot about my answer to this, and unfortunately I am going to give the BIGGEST cop-out of a response and say that I can't actually choose between Eleven and Twelve 😭😭

Just for the sake of having an answer, I'll say Twelve, just because he's my favorite Doctor. (And as much as I love it when characters are so broken up about losing people they love that they can't even talk about it--i.e. series 7 Eleven--I do very much appreciate the fact that we got to see Twelve actually consistently grieve onscreen. Also don't TALK to me about how the specific type of goodness he was able to successfully impart to Missy-about helping someone even when there's little to no chance of it succeeding, of getting anything good out of it for yourself, or of the other person ever knowing about it-CAME DIRECTLY FROM RIVER.)

But I really don't have like. A Specific Preference. I skew more toward the Doctors we've seen River interact with onscreen (and specifically during the Moffat Era because as everyone knows it's my favorite, lol), but I've really liked the fic I've read of her with Eight, and some of the stuff in the supplementary materials has gotten me to come around on her with Ten as well (I am notably not a Particularly Huge Fan of Ten). And I also even wrote a story once about her and Thirteen (that I then orphaned later for very stupid reasons). (It's here, if anyone's interested.)

All this being said, I wouldn't have fallen in love with this ship as much as I have if Eleven/River didn't exist. Twelve/River sees them both finally on the same page, and the whole "HE WOULDN'T BE IN LOVE ENOUGH TO BE STANDING [IN DANGER] WITH ME (*has actually been in the middle of said danger the entire time because he is in love enough*) was...look, that CHANGED MY BRAIN. PERMANENTLY. But I don't think people appreciate how truly DERANGED Eleven and River are.

She insults him/makes him look stupid and he just goes like this -> 😍. He starts accepting his interest in her WHEN HE LEARNS SHE'S IN PRISON FOR MURDER (probably for murdering him). They get so caught up in flirting (over River being A Scary Person specifically) that they completely forget that their best friend/family member is in the room with them and also in extreme danger. She expresses her affection by shooting his ridiculous hats off of his head. "Are you married/are you asking/yes." (*cue the most charmed expression on his face to ever exist*) "It's a shame you were busy that day" (<-because she had POISONED HIM AND HE WAS DYING). "And unlike me, she really doesn't mind shooting people, I shouldn't like that, kind of do a bit." "You graffiti-ed the oldest cliff face in the universe!"/"Well you wOuLdN't aNsWeR yOuR pHoNe." "You've got that face on again"/"What face?"/"The 'he's hot when he's clever' face"/"This is my normal face"/"Yes it is." "I do NOT sneak out at night to parties with RIVER SONG"/"How is she?"/"Fine. 😊"

His response to someone bringing her up and mentioning that she tried to kill him is "totally married her XD." She confessed her love to him via "getting the whole universe to mention how much they need him and agreed to marry him and he's still like, "Oh, gotta go check my fucking hair before I say hello to her again" in TATM. (Fun fact, the "Sorry honey, traffic was hell" line was originally, "Traffic was a bitch" which would have been the like. Highest-level curse word we've ever seen this man say, and it would have been in the context of trying to cleverly greet River which AGAIN, DERANGED BEHAVIOR.)

Fixed point that would destroy the universe if it were messed with? Too bad! Not if she thinks she has to kill him! "I'LL SUFFER IF I HAVE TO KILL YOU, MORE THAN EVERY LIVING THING IN THE UNIVERSE" OH MY GOOOODDDDDDDDD. (<-Worth noting that he calls her out over this for all of about two minutes before deciding the best way out of the situation is having an impromptu wedding.) She tells him TO HIS FACE "When I was little, I wanted to marry you" and then ALMOST INTENTIONALLY PERMANENTLY KILLS HIM LIKE TWO MINUTES LATER. He's dying on the floor in Berlin and still has the energy to go absolutely FERAL over the idea of someone hurting her. In the series 7 finale, she isn't even tangible and only exists through a conduit in Clara's head and he goes, "Too bad! I can hold you and kiss you and talk with you because I miss you, screw the actual laws of physics." (And then he's like, "Hmm, I probably look stupid right now. Oh well, back to talking to my wife, who I refused to say goodbye to for God Knows How Long because I would have been too sad.")

HE FALLS FOR HER POISONING GAMBIT BECAUSE HE'S HAVING TOO MUCH FUN FLIRTING WITH HER.

DUDE.

(Like, Twelve is also Deranged™ about her too, as evidenced by responding to her threat of cutting out his organs in alphabetical order with, "Which alphabet" and being jealous at the MOST inopportune times and, while in the middle of them fighting over who gets to risk sacrificing themselves, saying, "NOT ONE LIVING THING IS WORTH YOU" which is. Sure a line!!! That sure lives in my head rent-free!!!!! Also they have a Bonding Moment™ about carrying a severed head around in a bag. But the absolute INSANITY that goes on between River and Eleven is. Incredible.)

.........uhhhhh this. This got away from me. I also didn't really answer your question. Sorry? (<-Not actually sorry.)

[swanimagines]

hi jenni! thank you so much for all of your writing, it's so good! i would love it if i could please get a romantic self ship for a drabble or oneshot, whatever your preference, with cato from the hunger games?

my name is lisa and i go by she/her pronouns! i have medium brown hair that goes a little bit past my shoulders, light brown eyes, and dark eyelashes. i am an entj because i get very focused on school/making sure i put 100% into any task in front of me. i paint, draw, spend a lot of time outdoors, write, and am social on varying degrees- i talk too much with people i know but not a whole lot with strangers. i think i'd consider myself to be ambitious, too. i pride myself on getting to know people well enough that i know how to phrase the smallest sentence so that it'll make them laugh.

a few things i cannot stand: people who send me writing requests with literally nothing to go off of (your remark about people sometimes treating writers like a machine is so on point!), slow walkers, people who litter, and arugula. why is it in salads there's no point??

ok i think that was a little too much lol but i can't wait!! thank you again! 🥰

(Ships are closed and it's unlikely I will ever do them again especially now when I'm no longer a Tumblr writer, this event was held only for my friends in December 2021)

I read this over a few times during writing (SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG ARGH, I'm finally doing these as I'm preparing to wrap things up) and ALWAYS read "arugula" as "tarantula" and I was where the fuck do you live if tarantula salads are a common thing 😅 But I've heard many people don't like it, there's this 50's American diner styled restaurant in our northern neighboring city, and they put aragula in a lot of dishes, like on top of a nacho platter if you order it as a main course, I don't mind it but I understand why many do. Our cook here often puts nettle leaves in salads during summers, some of my Tumblr friends have been horrified by it before 😂

Also, I wanted to spend a moment to tell you how you're one of those people who kept me standing when I felt like I want to quit because of trolls and hate I got, or when things first started going south. You're an amazing person Lisa, and I'm sad to know that my time in the community might start to be up because it means I have to leave so many amazing people behind, like you. I have felt like this for a long time, over a year already, with some moments where I feel like I don't want to leave because accepting that I have to leave people behind hurts so much, to get rid of bad leaves I have to cut out some good leaves too. But during the time when I was part of the community, you were one of those people who grew to be important to me, whose comments I cherished, who I loved interacting with. I miss that time and I know I will miss it 5 years from now, when everything was still well. You will stay in my memories as one of those who supported me when I was feeling grim or like I can't write. Your comments were often simple and you didn't even say anything about the quality of my writing, like you commented "when will this be me? that's the goal babes." into one of my Kaz fics, and they still made me smile and feel good about myself and my writing/my effort to make people smile with my content. I do miss the interaction and the little community we had all that time ago, every time I publish something in AO3.

I hope you will stay in this community for a long time or if you ever decide to leave, you won't deactivate. I will surely visit your blog time to time, just to remember you, even if I won't be logged in. Reading our old asks and remembering how fun I had interacting with you. Or maybe someday I'll log back in and hit you with a message, who knows. I'll definitely pop by to tell you about meeting Freddy (+ Kit, Amita, Jessie, Archie and Dean) at least when I've come back from London in March and maybe send you pictures and videos from there.

But I want to thank you for being there and being such a good friend, the community is lucky to have you <3

Whoever first thought that the Hunger Games were a good idea to cope with lack of entertainment was a psychopath. Or no, anyone who thought it's good entertainment was a psychopath. Or a sociopath. To have bloodthirsty teenagers run across the forest killing each other was something Lisa had never understood - yet here she was, fighting off a girl who had found the little nest Lisa had built for an hour. She thought she had been good at camouflaging it, and she had maybe been too confident in herself as now she had a spear sticking through the side of her adobmen and a girl straddling her, trying to shove a knife into her throat.

Lisa flailed pathetically and the girl laughed. "You know, it's a pity to kill you. You could have become a famous author."

Splendid, one of Lisa's readers was about to kill her.

"It's a pity you will never read them once I do," Lisa hissed back and managed to kick the girl before scrambling backward, jerking her own knife out of her bag and throwing the cover aside. The girl rolled back before locking eyes with Lisa again. She eyed her own knife for a moment, and then at Lisa's knife. They both stood there for a moment, ready to fight, but then the girl lowered her knife. She clenched her jaw.

"You're lucky my knife isn't sharp enough to kill you at one go. I was unlucky when picking weapons. I mean, you'd think they provided us with new, sharpened ones," she said quietly and her eyes flickered at the spear sticking out on Lisa's side. "But if I'm lucky, that will kill you. Maybe maggots will nest there and you die by infection."

She took some steps backward, and then turned away, running into the night. Lisa groaned as the adrenaline started to fade and pain started to kick in.

"Motherfucker..." Lisa mumbled, looking at the spear. It hadn't gone through her, which made her curse even more. She definitely wouldn't be able to push the spear all the way through her body so she'd be able to snap it and pull it out to bandage it. She could try, and risk getting paralyzed in the process. Leaving it there, on the other hand, would lead to an infection. Either way, her game was over.

Lisa scoffed - authors rarely got killed by their readers. Lisa knew it wasn't personal, that girl had likely forced herself to be cold towards others for survival. She likely had a loving family, friends who prayed she'd make it home, that she'd win the Games. She did it for them. But the spear still didn't hurt any less.

Then, Lisa heard steps approaching her little tent. Rustle as a pair of feet hit the leaf-covered forest floor. She didn't even try to hide, if it was someone, they would likely be able to kill her in a heartbeat. So she waited, a moment, two. A shadow appeared to the doorway, and a figure crouched.

"Well, well, well. Someone else got the cutie before I could?" a voice said, that arrogant voice belonging to a guy Lisa had sparred with before the Games. They had had a flirting session, which felt kind of awkward now - she had called him cute too, and he had gotten visibly flustered.

"Cato," Lisa greeted the boy, rolling her eyes as he invited himself to step into Lisa's space. "Please, come in."

Cato's eyes flickered from her to her makeshift bed, to a few weapons Lisa had acquired. "Nice place. Nicer than mine, at least."

Lisa cocked an eyebrow. "I thought you formed a gang of some kind, where did you leave them?"

Cato sighed and scoffed. "Sleeping. I heard a noise coming from here and wanted to come and see what's happening and if I can join the fun."

Lisa looked at her wound and shrugged. "Well, my game is over. So, if you want to put me out of my misery..."

Cato scoffed, taking a hold of the spear and Lisa hissed at the feeling. "I did say that I wouldn't want a cutie like you dying among the first ones."

Then, a sickening crunch was heard and Lisa cried out, feeling blood gushing out of her backside. She felt some pressure a moment longer, before she saw Cato holding some bloody stick in his hand. It took her a moment to realise that the spear had disappeared, but blood was now gushing out of her adobmen. She quickly took a roll of bandage and started unwrapping it and wrapped it around herself and securing it with a pin.

She then looked up at Cato, searching his face. "You saved me."

Cato smirked, tucking a strand of Lisa's hair behind her ear. "Hunger Games is about dying in a fight. Someone has to see the life disappearing from your eyes as they twist a knife into your heart. It isn't entertainment if we all die by infections."

Lisa narrowed her eyes at him, trying to ignore the fact how tenderly he just touched her. "So you accept it as a form of entertainment?"

Cato hummed. "It's not like we have a choice. We are their entertainment, whether we want it or not. They're watching us right now, speculating if we'll be the tragic love story this season."

Lisa almost choked in her spit. "Love story? Us?"

Cato licked his lips, his smirk still on his face. "I just saved your life. We sit here peacefully, we aren't threatening each other. They probably think we're about to marry each other by now."

Lisa raised her eyebrows at him again, but then scooted away from him. "Well, when we meet the next time, those speculations will die."

Cato shrugged, standing up and started to back away towards the doorway. "Or then they won't. See, I'm not planning to be the one who kills you, unless you try to kill me."

With that, he disappeared into the night, leaving Lisa wondering what would happen within the next days - if Cato really meant what he said or if he just tried to manipulate her. If he was just trying to get close to strike when she least expected it.

But, a voice in her head said, maybe he was being genuine. Did Lisa's little flirting with him really do that, him going almost soft? What would happen if only the two of them would be left standing, would he kill her then? Or did he think she gets killed without it being him?

Lisa reclined on her makeshift bed, staring at the roof for a moment longer before letting herself to have a moment of rest before the next day - maybe she'd attempt to find Cato and manage to clear things some more.

[whumpitlikeyoumeanit]

Whumpuary 7

Whumpuary prompts should theoretically make up one cohesive narrative, though I'm not currently putting in the effort to flesh out the story around the prompts just yet. I have good intentions to do so eventually. Masterlist. Oh yeah and they're totally out of order, chronologically.

((content warnings: mention of torture ))

promptspiration: @whumpuary 07: Drugged

Whumpee: Draco Malfoy Whumper: Voldemort whump type: comfort fic type: Deathly Hallows "Voldemort learns Draco hooked up with Harry" AU

Snape and Narcissa caretakers while Draco's still a prisoner.

words: ~1000

-------------------

"My lord, eventually you are going to kill him." 

"Feeling sentimental, Severus?"

"Hardly." Snape's voice was dry. "Even as the dubious pleasure of minding students goes, a Malfoy is a special annoyance. But he is a useful tool against Potter, and Draco is not strong. Even the Cruciatus alone will eventually kill him. Sooner, if you keep letting Bellatrix at him."

"That's what I have you for." 

"I am not a healer." He sounded annoyed. "I'll do what I can." 

Draco was lifted into the air by a spell. He didn't resist it. He didn't know if they realised he was conscious and he thought he would prefer it if they did not. Maybe he wasn't, really. He felt very far away from his body, from the situation, like an observer. That was better. 

He was taken to his mother's parlour; even before he was laid on a sofa, he recognised it by the smell. This was where she had once arranged the flowers that dotted the house. They hadn't had flowers in years now, but still their ghosts lingered. 

Something was poured down his throat, vile and no doubt effective. His pain-tensed muscles began to relax and the ache eased. Snape was gentler than he had to be, holding his head in one hand and making sure he didn't choke. It wasn't really a surprise; ever since he saw how perfectly Snape hid the fact that he knew about him and Harry, he had realised that his words may just be just words, no matter how fiercely he seemed to believe them. He really was incredible. 

His mother's clipped steps hurried into the room. "Draco—" Snape moved aside and she took over, sitting with him and holding his head in her lap. He wished he could stay there forever. Her fingers brushed through his hair. 

"I've done what I can," Snape murmured. His voice was so low it seemed unlikely someone outside the room would even know there was talking going on inside. "You're allowed to tend to him?"

"Sometimes," she said icily. 

"When you are, give him this, as soon afterward as possible. It will impede the formation of the memories. Calming charms are tempting but try to avoid it if he's coherent; the long-term effects are unhealthy. He needs sleep—"

"I know this," she snapped, She was snappish from stress, not because Snape was doing anything wrong, but he was the closest thing to a safe person to take it out on. Draco wished he could make her feel better. Her hand gripped his shoulder tightly. "I need something to protect him—"

Snape cut her off. "There is nothing," he said harshly. "Nothing will provide any protection from the Dark Lord's punishments, that would not be obvious and make the situation worse. He will have to endure. This might make it easier to live with." 

She said nothing, but, in a few seconds, Draco felt her move and heard the touch of metal to glass, one of her rings coming into contact with the potion bottle as she accepted it. 

"Pain. Seized muscles." It sounded like he was going down a line of potions. He could sense the shifting of bottles. "Use them when necessary. I don't know when I'll be able to spare more."

"Sleep?"

"No. The demand is too high; Sleeping Draughts and several ingredients are in short supply. Blood-Replenishing."

"He won't need that." She sounded less like she knew that than that she couldn't believe otherwise.

Snape's voice was quiet but inarguable. "There is a mandate that he will be punished nightly, whether the Dark Lord is here or not." His mother's hands held him tight, but she couldn't make that not true. "Not everyone will continue to be entertained by mere pain. Keep it, and hope you're right.

"His mind is another matter. Draco." He didn't respond, willing Snape's attention to go away. "I know you're awake." It wasn't working. He shook his head infinitesimally and turned his face into his mother's stomach. She ran her fingers through his hair silently. That still seemed to be enough of an acknowledgement for Snape. "Practise your Occlumency."

"It doesn't work," he murmured.

"No," Snape agreed. "You will never be able to hide anything and I would discourage you from trying. I hope for all our sakes that you don't have something somehow worse that you need to — although at this point it seems nothing is beyond the scope of your ability to make bad decisions. But if you can maintain control of your mind, it may preserve your sanity." 

The 'for a time' went unspoken. Maybe it would keep his mind strong enough to take being dragged out in front of Him… every night…. for more torture, for no reason, nothing he could do to end it… Maybe it would. For a while. But if anyone made an effort to break him, he would break. If He lost control in his anger and didn't care if he stayed sane, he would break. Even if anyone became overzealous and went too hard, he could break… If it went on for too long with no end in sight, maybe then he would still break…

"All right," he said quietly. His mother held his head. 

"Give him a few drops of that. It's too late to do anything for tonight's session, but I don't need this conversation on display."

She stroked his hair and turned his head up, and dropped a small dose of a horribly sour potion into his mouth. He heard Snape's footsteps retreating from the room and put it out of his mind, hoping that everyone else would have forgotten about him and he'd be allowed to stay, for a few hours.

[ofglories]

*the door creaks open

|| I’ll try to keep this brief, because there’s a LOT of characters I interact with. I’ll hit the important ones:

Arthur - He’s… so sweet. Like a puppy. I want to ruffle his hair and pinch his cheeks. You hit the good notes wherein he’s following his own principles, and still shadowed by the past actions of his father. I’d like to see more of his insecurity or uncertainty, but you’ve got such a firm grasp on his character that it’s fine. Merlin adores him in all the AUs, and his desire to make Merlin happy by any means necessary is v. endearing.

Emrys - No joke, legit thought Emrys was an actual, canon character. It wasn’t until talking to a friend that I was like ‘Oh… he’s an OC?!’ You carry his character really well, molded and threaded into the story as if he was a genuine person from legend – you had me fooled! Merlin can’t say anything though, he’s biased therefore his ( correct ) opinion is irrelevant. I am so desperate to see him react to Uther and everything he’s done ( even if it would never happen ).

Uther - You ever met a man you hate? Not even beloathe but straight up hate? Look no more, Uther is here. The way you keep the tyrannical side just on the side of believable without leaning too far into cartoonishly evil is certainly commendable, tbh. I’d like to see if there’s something – a material possession, a person, something that would make that side of him crack, but it seems unlikely. ( Merlin isn’t available for comment. We know how he feels on the matter. )

Taliesin - I WANNA KNOW HIM MOREEEEE. God I love everything about Taliesin and I perk up every time I see him cross my dash. Such a cryptic and delightful bard. He gives me a “whimsical but can still kick your ass while being pretty about it” vibe and I want to scooch Merlin more towards him at some point bc I wanna see what happens 👀

|| How's my portrayal? ; accepting!!

Aaaaaaaaaaa thank you so much!

I'm honestly so glad to hear this and don't worry I do have Plans to explore more of Arthur's insecurities and uncertainties, and not just with Althur as the catalyst. There's a lot to explore with him that I haven't yet because he's genuinely deeply wounded by events in his life that affect him both as a Servant and as a living person that I can't wait to explore more. I'm definitely biased because, much like a certain OC of mine, I grew up with King Arthur stories and he's my favorite boy in Fate because of it so I try so hard to do him justice. He's very sweet, but also has a mischievous and recklessly stubborn side too that I'll have to dig into more.

Emrys is so much fun for me so I'm glad you like him! It was a challenge for myself when I first made him to take someone with so little information and presence in the legends as Ambrosius Aurelianus and flesh him out into a proper character, so I'm genuinely happy you say I've done well enough for him to properly feel like he belongs since he's really only mentioned by Geoffrey of Monmouth like...three times. Eventually he's going to have to face the facts of what Uther did and there will be an Event with that.

God, you have no idea how happy it makes me to hear that about Uther. He's a muse I'm deeply insecure with since I don't really write villains but I wanted him to be a believable evil tyrant. Someone who does terrible things without leaning into cartoonish steals candy from babies territory. He's a self-absorbed, self-obsessed violent jackass and is entirely unrepentant about it. I do wonder that too, though I have some personal doubt from my own admitted bias against him dkjfbjmhs

Oh my god thank you!! Taliesin is such a fascinating figure since he's simultaneously fictional and real so I worked hard to make him the way he is. You should absolutely throw Merlin at him more, Taliesin welcomes new students and he'd definitely view Merlin as one! He's an old man even with his pretty and youthful features-