#I am still looking soulless beings in the eye as they tell me they love working here

[vvitchella]

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[hannibals-favourite-meal]

Hi!!

Can you do a Sam Winchester begging plus size reader to sit on his face. Whatever vibes you want :) Dommy Sam is always a fav but as long as Sam is reassuring and eating reader out, I’m happy :)

Thank you!!

.⋆｡Peaches and Cream｡⋆.

Sam Winchester x plus size reader

Dean made the mistake of leaving you alone with a very soulless version of your best friend who only wants one thing from you

Warnings: soulless!Sam, smut, friends to lovers?, oral (f receiving), mentions of condoms, praise, body worshipping, overstimulation, dom!Sam, almost getting caught, little bit of self-consciousness WC: 1.8k

Minors DNI

a/n: thank you all for being so patient with me, i promise i only have a couple weeks left of uni and i'm gonna come running back with some new fics!

Library- @hannibals-favourite-meal-library

His eyes burned into the back of your skull, as they had been for the past 10 minutes. And yet, you refused to look up from the book in front of you, even though you had not turned a page in that same amount of time.  You weren’t a stranger to Sam’s gaze, in fact you used to love it; the way his big puppy dog eyes trailed up your curves whenever he thought you wouldn’t notice never failed to have heat bloom across your cheeks.

But his staring was far different now.

Sam was different now.

You could hear him shift in his seat before the tell-tale sound of his boots against the cheap vinyl as he got closer. You swallowed around the lump in your throat though it did nothing to sooth the fear simmering inside you. 

“You’re not reading.” His warm breath tickled your neck. You shivered and squeezed your eyes shut. You knew what he wanted, and so badly did you wish to give it to him, like you always had but it was so wrong. His soul was gone, the very thing that made Sam Sam but it was still his body, his voice so tantalisingly close.

“Yes I am.” You bit back a whimper as Sam leaned in closer, his large hands planting themselves on the table in front of you, keeping you pinned to the spot. The tip of his nose brushed gently along your ear.

“No.” Suddenly the book was ripped from your hands and thrown across the motel room (something your Sam would never do). “You’re not.”

His lips closed around your earlobe. “Sam.” You cursed Dean in your mind, that man and his need for diner pie no matter how far out of his way he had to go to get it. “We can’t.” Fire pooled between your plump thighs, quickly soaking through your panties. 

He shifted closer, his strong arms now tightly pressed against you. He released your ear with a soft pop. “Can’t or won’t? Because I think we both know just how badly you want me, sweetheart.” You held your breath as Sam’s hands slowly moved from the table to your wide hips.

“Sam.” You tried again but this time he answered you with a deep growl.

“Say my name like that again and I promise that you won’t be walking straight for a week.” A moan escaped your lips before you could even think of stopping it. You could feel Sam’s plump lips curl into a devious smirk. 

“But-“ His grip tightened and all the doubts in your mind vanished.

“But nothing. Dean won’t be back for hours and you need to unwind and I happen to know the perfect way to do that.” 

As a last ditch attempt before your mind completely went fuzzy, you blurted out- “We don’t have condoms.”

His chuckle rumbled through your bones, sending a chill of excitement up your spine. “I’m not gonna fuck you, not today at least. I just want a little taste of this nice,” His right hand slid down the pudge of your stomach and wedged itself between your thighs, cupping you over the thick denim of your jeans, “juicy,” He nuzzled his face against your neck, “cunt.” 

“Be gentle?” You turned your head, encouraging the larger man to meet your gaze. His eyes shone with his victory.

“You want your Sammy don’t you?” He teased. “Don’t worry sweetheart, I’ll give you exactly what you want.” And then he struck. 

His lips moulded perfectly against yours in a kiss long overdue. It was soft, almost sweet but you could feel the way he was holding back, forcing himself to relent to your wishes, even as he cupped your jaw with his other hand, deepening it. 

You whimpered against his lips and he reluctantly pulled away. You barely had a moment to catch your breath before Sam yanked you from your chair and lifted you into his arms. “Sam!” You tried to protest, but he silenced you with a kiss more determined than before. 

His tongue forced its way into your mouth as he strode to his unused bed. Your arms wound around his neck, Sam growling in approval. His knees bumped against the mattress and he fell forwards, catching himself with his right hand before he could crush you. Your pussy squeezed around nothing at the raw strength of the hunter you’d been pining for. 

You grabbed at the front of his flannel as he tugged on the hem of your jeans. Your teeth clacked together and the sound of ripping fabric filled the room. “Eager girl.” Sam groaned against your lips as you still held onto the now destroyed shirt in your grip. 

Your jeans button popped open. “Please Sam.” His long fingers grazed the wet spot on your panties and your hips bucked up, encouraging his touch to go just a little further down. He chuckled cruelly but yet he obeyed. The calloused tips of his fingers pressed into your throbbing clit, making your jaw drop with a silent moan.

He nipped at the frantic pulse along your throat, unbothered by the deep welts he was leaving behind. Your heart skipped a beat as you laid your palms onto his naked chest. “Sam.” His name was barely even a breath. 

“Good girl.” Your ruined panties were pushed to the side as his middle finger traced up your slit, gathering as much of your wetness as he could. “So wet for me. You’ve been waiting so long haven’t you.” He cooed.

You tried to pull him closer, but he wouldn’t budge, content in teasing you. “Shhh let me play a little longer and then I’ll give you what you want.” His slender hips rolled against your thigh, letting you feel the monstrous bulge of his cock where it was straining against his own jeans.

You squirmed as he finally pressed his thick fingers to your clit, just barely dousing the fire between your legs. “Please.” Your eyes burned with tears of desperation. You needed him like it was the only thing keeping you alive.

Sam tsked and in response, pulled his fingers away. You nearly cried as your relief was ripped away from you. “Now, while I do love your begging, we’re doing this my way. You need to learn.” 

He leaned back onto his heels, his ripped shirt perfectly framing his toned stomach and chest. You couldn’t look away from him, never could you have even dreamed that your best friend was this good-looking. “Jeans. Off.” 

Your hands flew down to your hips, eager to obey. Sam smirked and pulled off the tattered flannel, his eyes remained on you though, burning with lust. Your hands shook as you finally got your pants off. Your panties quickly followed after.

“What a good little slut, listening so prettily. You just want your Sammy to take care of you don’t you.” You nodded desperately.

“Please, wanna be good.” 

He grabbed your wide hips and rolled onto his back, dragging you up the length of his torso until you were straddling his wide shoulders. “Then be good for me and sit on my face.”

“But-“ He shot you a lot from between your legs and dragged you up further so you had no choice but to plant your knees on the mattress next to his head. You caught yourself on the wall behind the headboard as you tried to rock forwards and pull yourself up. 

“Do this for me, sweetheart. Lemme drown in that pussy.” His teeth sunk into the soft fat of your inner thigh. 

“But Sam, I-I don’t want to hurt you. ‘M not exactly small.” 

“Sit. I won’t repeat myself again.” Your knees wobbled but you remained upright, determined to not harm the man beneath you. “Fine, don’t say I didn’t warn you.”

His arms wound around your legs and forced you down onto his mouth. “Perfect.” He grumbled into your cunt.

“Sam!” But before you had the chance to even think of prying yourself from him, Sam’s lips sealed around your clit and it took every ounce of self-restraint you had not to court around his head and keep him right there, suckling at you, forever.

Your moans echoed through the cheap motel room, bouncing off the peeling wallpaper and soaking into the old carpeting. You couldn’t help but grind down onto his face, chasing the pleasure he had already denied you once before. Sam groaned in approval from between your legs. His tongue lapped at you, moving with a precision that had you asking yourself why you hadn't relented sooner.

“Are-are you spelling something?” He just winked at you and ducked his head down once more. Your eyebrows scrunched as you tried to concentrate on the fluid movement of his tongue against you though the blinding pleasure made it difficult.

S-A-M-U-E-L He took a breath. W-I-N-C-H-E-S-T-E-R

He was branding you, and that thought sent you catapulting to the precipice of your end. “Sam, Sam please. ‘M so close, please, please.” His right hand released your thigh and quickly slipped underneath his chin, letting his thick fingers finally breach your needy cunt. The knot in your stomach wound impossibly tighter and then just as he crooked his fingers, hitting the delicate bundle of nerves within you, Sam spelled one more word.

M-I-N-E

“Fuck fuck fuck!” You thrashed on top of him, wave after wave of euphoria washing over you, drowning you in it as Sam’s unrelenting ministrations pushed you right into another orgasm just as the first was dying down.

Your hands flew to his silky hair and tried to pry him off of you but he kept going, seemingly determined to make you pass out from the pleasure. “Too much.” Your whole body shook as your nerves lit up like fireworks.

“Oh god-“ Suddenly, the tell-tale rumble of the Impala had both you and the man you were straddling freeze. The car door squeaked and you both looked at each other. 

Sam grabbed your hips and rolled you onto your back before ripping his half-naked body from yours. You threw the covers over yourself and shut your eyes, praying that your heavy breathing wouldn’t be noticed by the other hunter. 

Just as Dean’s footsteps reached the motel room door, Sam had tugged on a new (non-ripped) flannel from his bag. Your eyes slammed shut as the door creaked open and Dean slipped inside.

There was a beat of silence. “She sleeping?” You breathed out a sigh of relief, you couldn’t imagine what he would’ve thought if he realised what was happening between his soulless little brother and you barely moments before.

“Yeah.” Sam responded in a clipped tone, a now regular occurrence with his brother. Dean hummed and you heard the sound of a plastic bag being placed on the kitchen counter.

“I got some food for us. You want any?” You could’ve melted from the genuine concern in his voice but as Sam answered, your stomach churred with embarrassment.

“I already ate.” He smirked as he wiped away the last remnants of your cum from his lips with his thumb.

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[cntloup]

Queen!Reader x Knight!Ghost After you take a stabbing that was meant for Ghost

Part 1

The vast bleak shadow of despair is cast over the castle. 

Simon marches the halls in utter anguish as the nurses gather in your chambers to tend to your wound. 

Every scream of agony that falls from your mouth is a stab to his already aching heart. 

Time passes agonizingly slow, each second tormenting him more than the last, tearing his soul apart. 

He sits on the floor by the door with his back pressed against the wall, your uncontrollable shrieking screams filling his ears, setting his soul on fire as anxiety and sheer distress consume him. 

He rests his head in his hands as he sobs in utter despair, until a heavy silence falls over the roof, your screams have stopped. 

He's on his feet in an instant, rushing through the door to your chambers, feeling light-headed and a sickening sensation settling in his chest, fear of the worst possible scenario gnawing at his heart. 

He enters the room and his fretful eyes roam across the faces, silently demanding answers. 

Until they fall on your motionless figure and the dread of the worst comes crashing down on him. 

He rushes to your side and searches for any sign of you being alive until he notices the faint heaving of your chest. 

“My lord, she is resting. She's very weak, but hopefully she will regain her strength soon.” one of the nurses tells him. 

He shuts his eyes and lets out a sigh, half relieved that you are alive and breathing and half still afraid, dreadful thoughts of losing you plaguing his mind.

The mere thought of it makes his heart crumble in his chest and an icy cold shiver passes through him as the image of his life without you flashes before his eyes, an empty and soulless life.

----- 

As days pass by, you gradually return to consciousness and regain your strength as he stays by your side every moment of the day, spending all his time doting on you. 

And his love and care bring back the light of life to your soul and body which in turn, diminishes the darkness, the fear and torment in his heart. 

But there’s still something that pains him constantly, the guilt and remorse that he did not act fast enough to save you clawing at his soul. It should have been him instead of you. 

“Simon...” you call out while you lay on his chest, your voice weak and hoarse.

He brings the glass of water to your lips as he holds you in his arms. 

You can sense the tension in the room. You know him well enough to know what burdens him at this moment. 

“Yes, my love?” he encourages you to go on, planting a soft kiss on the top of your head. 

“I will do it again... and again... if circumstances call for it.” you say as you lift your head to look him in the eye. He can see the sincerity and earnestness in your eyes. 

“Please, love... it should have been me. I cannot bear to lose you. Why waste your life for such a wicked soul? Please promise me you will do no such a thing again!” he pleads barely above a whisper, the lump in his throat threatening to burst any moment while he looks at you through glossy eyes. 

“Wicked?!” you exclaim in shock, though not much surprised to hear that he thinks this low of himself since he has mentioned such remarks about himself time and time again. 

“Simon, I assure you that you are a great man, an honorable man. And you are the love of my life. My husband. And I will do everything in my power to save your life each time as you would do to save mine.” you state in utmost honesty and sincerity. 

“I do not deserve such an honor. I don’t deserve you.” he mutters and you close the gap between you, kissing him as your love for him burns fiercely in your heart, seeping through the kiss until you’re both left breathless. 

“You deserve all of it. Every ounce of love and happiness in the world. I would give it all to you if I could. But I am only me. A mere measly human. And you’re stuck with me.” you remark as your hand rests on his chest and a wide grin paints your beautiful face which makes his heart skip a beat, in complete awe of your beauty and grace. 

“You are much more than that, my love. You're a goddess. And I am merely a worshipper at your shrine.” he responds and leans in to kiss you again, “I love you, Simon.” you whisper only inches away from his lips, “I love you too. With all my heart and soul.”

[holylulusworld]

Extreme tight places (4) - Kinktober 3

Summary: You’re stuck with a soulless Sam again.

Pairing: Soulless!Sam x fem!Reader

Warnings: soulless!Sam being his asshole self, anal sex, smut, unprotected sex, degrading, creampie, voyeurism, outdoor sex, sex in front of others, violence, possessive soulless Sam, forced cum eating (not the reader)

Rating: Explicit

Kink: Anal sex

Square filled for @samwinchesterbingo: Square 18: Plot what plot?

Square filled for @spnkinkbingo 2022 (expired): Square 1: Anal Sex

Catch up here: Cramped (1) & Tight places (2) Very tight places (3)

Kinktober vs Flufftober 2024

“Sam! Sam, stop! You’re going to kill him!” You desperately try to drag Sam off a fellow hunter. You don’t like the hunter, but the last thing you need is rumors spreading that Sam Winchester killed another hunter. “Sam, please.”

“He tried to touch what’s mine!” Sam is like an animal. Not only because of his soullessness but also because the hunter tried to hit on you during a get-together to celebrate the life of a deceased hunter. “No one touches what’s mine.”

You huff. It’s not like you’re together or shit. Sam is simply obsessed with fucking you. There’s no love or even feelings between the two of you.

“SAMMY!” Dean and Cas finally come to your aid. They grab Sam by his arms and drag him off the hunter. “What the fuck!”

“He tried to grope my girl’s ass.” Sam tries to apologize that he tried to beat the life out of the man. “No one touches what’s mine, Dean. Not even you.”

“Sam, get your shit together,” Dean snaps at his brother. Lately, he’s struggling to see Sam as his brother. Death brought Sam’s soul back, but they are still trying to figure out how to turn the new version back into his former self.

Sam squares his jaw. “Let go of me, or you’ll get a taste of my strength too.” Dean shakes his head. The thing possessing his brother is so unlike the Sam he raised. “Y/N, come.”

He holds out his hand for you. You could tell him to fuck off because he flirted with one of the huntresses, but it would only cause Sam to go rampant and find a reason to fight with someone else.

“Sam,” you huff when he drags you toward the back of the place, away from the crowd. “Where are we going?”

“I need to fuck you,” he states, ignoring that you wiggle in his tight grip. “You need to feel it in your bones that your holes are all mine.”

“Says the guy flirting with some bitch moments ago. You’re only angry because the guy was nice to me.” You bite back.

He stops in his tracks to look you up and down. His eyes darken, and you bite your tongue. One wrong word and he fucks you right there, in front of everyone.

“He touched you,” he snarls. “I told her to go down on her knees and suck me off if she wants my help on a hunt.” Sam shrugs. “She was an uptight bitch. Not wet and soft like you.”

“What the—?” You can’t believe Sam sometimes. He tells you he wanted some bitch to suck him off after he almost beat a man to death because the hunter dared to talk to you. “You’re unbelievable!”

“I know, kitten,” he purrs and presses you against the wall. He slips one hand between your bodies to hastily unbutton your pants. Your eyes round. Sam can’t be serious. “That’s why you’re always so needy.”

“I hate you so much,” you argue, but don’t fight his hand slipping inside your pants to pinch your clit. “Sam, not here. Let’s go somewhere else.” You know Sam is pumped up and needs to release some steam. “Please.”

“I love it when you beg me.” He presses his lips to yours, swallowing the tiny moans escaping your lips. Sam smirks when you buck your hips, silently begging him for more. He hums against your lips as he slips his index finger inside your cunt. “Already so wet for me.”

“S-am,” you whimper against his lips. “Pl-ease. Somewhere else.”

“I want them to know you’re mine,” he growls and removes his hand. You don’t argue. Fighting with Sam is a lost cause. Instead, you let him grab your hand and guide you out of the bar.

Sam leads you toward a car you don’t recognize. He twirls you around to bend you over the hood. Sam rips your still unbuttoned jeans down your legs, taking your panties with it.

“That’s how I like you.” He slaps your ass, roughly groping your globes. If you weren’t in a parking lot, he’d spank your ass raw tonight. “Always so ready to take my cock.”

Sam uses his large hand to spread your ass-cheeks. He smirks when you wiggle in his grip. You know he wants to prove your ass belongs to him. Literally. A warm liquid hits the crack of your ass, making you whimper. “Oh, kitten. This ass is mine.” He hums. “It opens up like a slutty hole to me.”

“Sam, not here,” you try one last time, but Sam throws the empty bottle of lube over his shoulder. He unzips his pants and slaps his cock against your ass.

“You’ll let me fuck this tight asshole and take it like a good slut. Maybe I’ll let you cum this time too.” Sam laughs when you hiss his name. He ignores you’re angry at him for flirting with the other woman. While you lie on the car, giving in to his demands once again, he runs his hard cock up and down the crack of your ass to get lube all over his massive erection. “You’re my whore.”

He presses the tip inside, making you hiss. It’s always a struggle to take Sam up your ass. At least he’s less impatient tonight and slowly inches his way inside. His hands grip your hips hard enough to hurt.

“Fuck, Sam…”

“Yeah, I’m going to fuck this hole open,” he growls like the possessive caveman he turns into when it comes to fucking you. “Watch me ruin her ass.”

You don’t have time to think about his words. Sam pushes you down onto the hood of the car and holds you there as he shoves the last inches inside. You’re panting because his massive cock feels good in your tightest hole.

“You’re an ass whore. I knew it.” Sam leans over your body to whisper in your ear. “Say it. Say, I’m Sam Winchester’s anal slut.”

“I’m—” you choke out a moan when Sam slowly starts pushing in and out of your ass. He barely moves his hips, only pressing his cock into you with short strokes, but you feel immense pleasure. You don’t know why, but no matter how Sam fucks you, it always feels good. “I’m Sam Winchester’s anal slut.” You breathe out, making Sam laugh.

“Yes, you are,” he pants in your neck while his hips mercilessly crash into your ass. “Always full of my cock, only mine.”

“Yes…”

“I bet you’ll cum like the whore you are with my big cock up your ass,” he taunts. “Right? You’ll squirt like a slut because you’re my anal whore.”

You should be ashamed. Sam is fucking your ass over the hood of someone else’s car. He calls you his whore, but you couldn’t care less. The bastard ruining your ass isn’t wrong. The pressure in your ass has you tethering on the edge of an orgasm.

He’s pounding you deep, hard, and fast. Sam groans in your ear, getting more excited. His desperate groans get you more excited. Your body is ready to give in to the pleasured pain. You whimper his name, telling him to cum inside of your ass.

And he just lets go, slamming one hand between your legs to swipe left, right, left, and right until you squirt all over his hand. “Perfect whore, isn't she?”

Sam pulls out, stepping away from the car to let whoever watched him fuck your ass watch his cum drip out of your gaping hole.

“Perfect hole.”

You try to catch your breath as you lie on the car. Total spend. Sam eagerly spreads your cheeks to look at his cum. He hums before thrusting one finger inside to scoop a large amount of his cum with his finger. “Come here and have a taste.”

“Dude, I’m good over here,” the man grunts. He’s holding his bruised ribs and glares at Sam. “I don’t know what kind of sick game you’re playing, but I’m out.”

“I said,” Sam growls in the man’s direction. “Come over here and have a taste. That’s what you wanted, right? To fuck my girl’s ass.”

“Sam?” You slowly get up from the car and pull your pants back up. You turn around to watch the man Sam punched earlier stand a few feet away. “What the fuck!”

“Buddy, if you ever get close to her ass again, you’re dead,” Sam smirks darkly. He wraps his hand around the man’s throat and forces his finger inside his mouth. “That’s the closest you’ll get to my girl’s ass. Now swallow like a good boy and get lost.”

“You found a way?” You whisper to not wake Sam. After the fucked-up stunt, he pulled his brother, knocked him out. “How can I help you?”

“You need to distract him. Stay inside the room until Death arrives. It’s only a few hours; Y/N. Sammy will be back soon,” Dean gives you an apologetic look. “I know you liked this one, but...”

“Not after tonight!” You hold up your hand. “He risked my safety, Dean. If that guy was a little more..." You sniffle. “If he knocked Sam out, it would’ve ended badly for me, Dean. If we can bring the normal Sam back, I’d do anything to help you.

Screams echo through Bobby's house. You press your hand to your ears and try to blend out that Sam is suffering inside Bobby’s panic room.

Death brought his soul back and finally found a way to get the old Sam back too.

If only it weren’t so painful...

“It’s going to be alright.” You look at Dean, nodding. You don’t know if he wants to convince you or himself. “It must…”

The screams abruptly end. Death slips out of the room. He ignores you and whispers something in Dean’s ear. “I know, we will be careful.”

You gave the brothers time and space to reunite, promising to stick around for the next case. The procedure was a success. Sam is back to his old self.

What Dean didn’t tell you before Death got to work was that Sam wouldn’t remember your time together. The truth is, Sam doesn’t remember anything after he jumped into the pit.

Maybe it’s for the best. What you let his soulless version do to you was something the old Sam would never understand.

“Y/N, hey.” You look up from your book when Sam calls your name. He leans in the doorframe, eyes glued to your exposed legs. “I heard you helped Dean while I was gone.”

“Uh-yeah. Kinda,” you lie. It’s all you can do. Death warned you and the others not to tell Sam what happened over the last months. If you do, the consequences will be dire.

“Hmm…” He pushes off the doorframe, stepping inside your motel room. Sam slams the door shut and hums as you flinch at the sudden motion. His eyes are softer, and his behavior changed, but the smirk creeping on his face is not different from his soulless version’s smirk. “I see, you liked riding my dick.”

“What? I—what?” You splutter. He can’t know. It’s impossible. Death said Sam won’t remember a thing.

“I can’t remember much, but the videos on my phone helped me. I must say, you have been a good little slut for me.” He laughs darkly as you stare at him like a deer in headlights. “How about we refresh my memory and you let me fuck that pretty cunt and ass again?”

Tags in reblog.

[nochedie]

intertwined, sewn together | sam winchester ☁️

pairing: sam winchester x gn!reader

genre: fluff

wordcount: 1k ish

summary: just some late night talking

a/n: hehe… um 😳 i actually haven’t written anything for 7 YEARS! and i haven’t ever written for spn before! so please be gentle with me 🙏 i am working on a soulless sam fic but it’s becoming pretty long soo i decided to just do a little fluffy drabble in the meantime! i have a migraine so im sorry if it makes little to no sense :) i read through a couple times and i cant tell if its bad or if i just hate my own writing (definitely the last one but it might be both 😌☝🏼) anyways i love sam and i needed some fluff! much love and please enjoy 🫶🏼

“do you ever think about… the future? for us?” you and sam were laying next to each other in the motel room double bed, alone in the room. dean was out at the nearest bar, and told you both not to wait up. you always cherished the alone time with sam.

he turned to face you, brushing a strand of hair behind your ear. “all the time.”

“and what do you think about?” you took in each and every inch of his face, the sculpt of his jaw, his eyes which held a look of admiration as they looked into yours.

“i think about… one day being able to just… live. you know? me and you. forever.” his voice held some sadness. and you knew exactly why. you could think about this all you wanted, but the life you led… it could never be normal. sam had tried before, he had tried to be normal, tried to live a normal life. but everything fell apart. you knew he still felt that pain. he wanted so badly to be normal. but he was a winchester.

“maybe we can’t live some suburban life. but we don’t need that to live, sam… sure, our job is dangerous but… well we’re still here, aren’t we? we’ve made it this long.”

“y/n…” you reached out to touch his cheek, and his eyes closed at the feeling, completely relaxing into your touch. “i just… every single day i wake up and worry that something is going to happen to you.”

“hmm… it almost sounds like you don’t think i can fend for myself. you know i can beat a vampire with my bare hands!” you definitely could not.

sam’s laughter filled the room almost immediately, “oh, suddenly you have super strength?”

“you don’t know what i have.” you feigned offence, pulling out of his grasp and turning your body away from him.

“um… what do you think you’re doing?” he spoke between chuckles, slipping his arms around your torso, pulling you flush against him. “let me see your pretty face, love.”

“only if you admit that i have fists of steel and i could absolutely kill a vampire with no weapon.” sam had killed gordon with nothing more than a bit of wire, so this wasn’t the most unrealistic claim.

“right. you’re right, honey. vampires watch out! y/n’s coming! with… maybe chicken wire?”

“you’re mean.”

he practically erupted into laughter, more of an endearing laughter than anything else. he gave you a tight squeeze from behind, pressing a kiss to your neck.

“turn around please, honey. i promise i’ll stop.”

you heeded his request, turning in his embrace so that your faces were but centimetres apart.

“there you are.” he took a deep breath in as he studied every inch of your face, taking in each small detail, each feature which made up the face he loved so much.

you slid one arm around his torso and rest the other on his chest, shuffling as close as you could and letting your eyes close.

“you getting tired?” sam reached over to turn off the bedside lamp, leaving only a sliver of light in the room from the outside street lights.

“just a little. but let’s keep talking, okay?”

“alright, love. what do you want to talk about?” he shifted onto his back and put his arm around you, leading your head to rest against his shoulder, while one arm kept resting on his chest.

“chicken wire.” you stifled a laugh.

sam looked up at the ceiling, a wide smile plastered on his lips. these were his favorite moments with you, and he adored how you could immediately switch his mood.

this hunt in particular had been tough, but it was over now, and this was your last night in the motel before heading to sioux falls in the morning to meet with bobby. the hunt forced sam into some uncomfortable thoughts. you had come far too close to danger, and it sent him into a spiral worrying about you. he hadn’t even thought about what he would do if he lost you, but it felt like he had been hit head on by the thought. he really couldn’t live without you, he knew that for a fact. tonight, he was really feeling it. all he wanted to do was hold you close and never let go. but this conversation with you, your optimism and your smile, just you, allowed sam to feel a genuine content.

“i love you.” he whispered, planting a kiss on top of your head.

you hadn’t realised how tired you were, and you had already drifted to sleep. after a few minutes, sam did the same.

****

you opened your eyes to see sam looking back at you, already awake. “good morning, love.”

“good morning.” you stretched your limbs, sitting up in the bed before looking around the room. “dean didn’t come back last night?”

“he did, he went out to pack up the car. you slept in pretty late.”

“hmm.. well we better get ready and hit the road, then?”

“or… we could cuddle for a bit.” he tugged on your arm, attempting to coax you to lay back.

“sammy.. you just said i slept in pretty late.”

“and did i say that was a bad thing?” cue two more arm tugs.

just as you were about to lay back down and into sam’s arms, you heard a few knocks, followed by dean’s voice through the door. “cars packed up, you kids have got fifteen minutes or i’m leaving you behind!”

“i guess no cuddling today.” sam has to suppress a whine as he reluctantly gets out of bed.

“do you think we have time for a shower?”

“oh, definitely.” you jump out of bed and grab sam’s outstretched hand, following him into the bathroom.

comments, feedback etc always appreciated! thank you for reading!

[drkmgs]

Unfair

Wednesday Addams x Reader

Warning: mention of two-timing, not loyal, hurt, sad, just painful, torture, beaten, starved, dehydrated, this took too much effort...

"You're being unfair, Wednesday. I have ignored what you have been doing behind my back. Your everyday meeting with Tyler and Xavier? Worst kissing Tyler, while you have a partner who is constantly worried about you, and when were you going to tell me about your engagement? huh?! When?!" You screamed at her, it almost broke your vocal cords. This was the first time you screamed at someone, specifically someone you love.

You couldn't help it. The last month being with Wednesday was torture for you and your heart. Everything came crashing to you this week, her random rendezvous with Tyler and Xavier you have known for a while but didn't confront her about it, and the engagement was just a day ago when your mother asked if you were going to attend.

"What do you want me to do, Y/N? Cancel the engagement? You know I can't do that. Tyler and Xavier were merely my subjects for the investigation. The kiss with Tyler? I didn't regret it, because it lead me to solve the mystery." Wednesday says with her logical tone.

You could hear your heart shatter at her comment. You couldn't believe what you were hearing. You gave her everything, but in return, that's all she had for you? She didn't even make an effort to cancel her engagement. Did she even love you?

"Tell me, Wednesday Addams. Did you ever love me?! All the sweet things you said to me, were they all lies? Did you just use me for your pleasure? Is that all I am to you? Cause if it is, then we should break whatever we have now and you go on with your engagement." You wiped your tears away and composed back to your confident self.

"As I told you I cannot easily break off the engagement. I need time." Wednesday argued back with ease. "How much time do you possibly need to call off an engagement? What reasons do you need to delay it? If you don't love them you won't make this hesitant decision! If you love me you would have chosen me already, but you don't! You keep procrastinating!" You fire back at her.

There was silence engulfing you both. This was the sign you were waiting for. She didn't love you as much as you love her. You sighed and turned your back to her, you gave her a glance over your shoulder.

"Then I may congratulate you on your engagement, Ms. Wednesday Addams. I wish, we never see each other again." Your tears completely stopped by now and you gave her a thin smile. You left her dorm quickly.

___

After that incident, you completely vanished from Nevermore Academy. Nobody knew where you were, and a lot of students speculated that you dropped out, because of what happened between you and Wednesday.

But that wasn't the case. You had some unfinished business back in your hometown that needed to be done before you graduate from Nevermore. You didn't drop out, Principal Weems put you on temporary leave for future purposes. When you came back, everyone was shocked at your drastic change. You didn't look like how you left. You had bruises, cuts, and healed wounds all over your body and face. It looks like you got ganged up on.

For Wednesday the bruises, cuts, and healed wounds didn't bother her, what bothered her the most is your eyes. They were soulless. They weren't like the ones before, full of life, full of sparkles, and galaxy colors. Now it's pitch black, like the color of a raven. Also, your smile was far gone. This made Wednesday's heart clench as if someone is squeezing the blood out of it.

"What happened to you?" That was her approach to you. "Hello to you too, Addams. or is it a different surname now?" You said, not looking at her. You kept your head low, hiding underneath your hoodie. "Still Addams. Answer my question." Wednesday is very determined to know. "None of your concern." You answered. You head to the office of Principal Weems, and Wednesday still follows you, which irritated you. "Look, Addams. I'm not going to tell you anything even if you follow me into the bathroom. So, stop following me and piss off." You snapped at her. She was about to say something when you turned around and walked off.

Soft knocks got the Principal out of her thoughts. "Come in" was the only thing you heard from the other side. "Oh, Y/N." She stood up as soon as she saw you enter the room. You ran up and hugged her. That's when you broke loose to any emotions you were holding. "It's okay. You did great holding on. You're safe." She soothes you by rubbing your back. Before you left, you did talk to Principal Weems about your family situation and when she lost contact with you, it was her mission to get you back safe and sound, but when she found you, you were already covered in scars and wounds.

Your family is one of the major shareholders of an assassins association, when you learned about this you didn't want to be in it. So, your family and you agreed, before you graduate from Nevermore, you'll have your first and last mission as an assassin in exchange to be set free. To hear that at a young age, it was a perfect deal but when you came to realize it was a way to get rid of you for disgracing the family name, you needed help, that's when you reached out to Principal Weems.

You were tortured, beaten, and nearly starved to death when police raided your family's mansion. They found you shackled on the wall, dehydrated, and lumped. Principal Weems saw the raid go down and couldn't believe how your own family could do this to a such wonderful child.

Now you're in her care and safe back in Nevermore. "I hear from a little bridie Ms. Addams called off an engagement." She whispered as she comforts you. "Is that little bridie as big as a person, has blonde hair with blue/pink highlights?" You snickered. "Hm. Maybe?" She moved out of your hug and looked at you. "Wednesday's mother called. She confirmed it." You looked at her confused, but then you smirked up at her. "Y/N. Don't get cocky. I am still your Principal and I was invited to the engagement party." She shrugged. "I wasn't going to say something, but okay. I don't think it's smart to get back with Wednesday." You say avoiding Principal Weems as she sits back on her swivel chair. "And why is that?" She asked eyeing you as you drift your eyes everywhere but hers. "because who would want a broken me?" You whispered but loud enough for someone to hear who just entered the room.

"Me. I want you. back." Wednesday answered standing behind you and glaring up at you. Principal Weems smiled at the sight. "Ms. Addams, would you show Mx. Y/N their new room? Mx. Y/N, I'll talk to you again after supper." Principal Weems shoo both of you out of her office. "Come with me." Wednesday leads you to your new room. She opened the door and let you in. You looked around to find all of your belongings there.

"Isn't this your Typewriter?" You stopped in front of an extra desk and chair with a black Typewriter. "Yes. I have used this room for writing my novel and it reminds me of you." Wednesday said as she stepped forward towards you. "I apologize. For everything. I wasn't considering your emotions and feelings in the past. When you stormed out of the room, I have come to realize how important you're to me. I searched for you the next day, but you were already gone." Wednesday came very close to you. "I have never considered torture as painful but when you left me that torture was unbearable." She continued. "Come back to me, amore mio." her eyes pleading. "I can't. Wednesday. I have been through hell these past months. I can't throw myself into a relationship right now. I'm broken." You say looking into her eyes.

"I'm willing to wait until you're ready, amore mio."

[queen-of-deans-booty]

Brother's Keeper: Final Part

Pairing: Dean Winchester x Female!Reader

Word Count: ~2.1k

Warnings: canon angst and violence, extra angst, feeling broken and utterly helpless to the point of depression

Summary: The repercussions of every bad thing you did while being soulless hit you like a freight train at full speed. There are no words that can describe how broken you feel. Sam and Dean manage to break the spell and lift the curse but what did you let out in return?

Season Ten Masterlist

Author’s Note: I do not own anything from Supernatural. All credit goes to their respective owners. I love seeing any and all comments <3

x

After setting the food up, he starts spray painting symbols onto one of the tables. He takes out the ingredients to summon someone. He says something in Latin and the entire place shakes with power. Ten minutes later, you know exactly what Dean is up to.

"Dean, don't do this," you whisper but he ignores you.

"Don't tell me that's queso."

You and Dean turn to see Death standing in the middle of the restaurant.

"Yes. Queso and taquitos and tamales." Dean grabs the tray of food and moves it closer to Death. "Bought by yours truly all with the bad fat." Death sniffs at the food and nods in approval. "Consider it an offering."

"For?"

"I want you to put a wall in Y/N's mind."

"What? No," you say, getting a burst of energy.

"Y/N, have you seen yourself in the mirror? Do you really want to feel this way?"

"I deserve to feel this way!" you yell. "After everything I've done, I deserve to feel broken!" I am broken. I'm worthless. You turn to Death. "I don't want the wall. I want to think about every bad thing I did because I deserve the hell I put myself into!"

Dean only knows you're lashing out because you're hurt. He doesn't have time to argue with you. He'll convince you to put a wall up eventually... hopefully. Death clears his throat and takes a bite of one of the taquitos.

"Can you get rid of our Marks?"

"Yes."

"Why do I feel like there is a 'but' coming?"

"Before there was light, before there was God and the archangels, there wasn't nothing. There was the Darkness, a horribly destructive, amoral force that was beaten back by God and his archangels in a terrible war. God locked the Darkness away where it could do no harm, and he created a Mark that would serve as both lock and key, which he entrusted to his most valued Lieutenant, Lucifer. Then the Mark began to assert its own will, revealed itself as a curse, and began to corrupt. Lucifer became jealous of man. God banished Lucifer to Hell. Lucifer passed the Mark to Cain, who passed the Mark to you two, the proverbial fingers in the dike."

"Darkness?" you ask.

"I know where your Mark resides, Y/N. It's ironic that it chose that place to be instead of your arm like Dean's. You know the Darkness by another name."

"Amara," you whisper.

"Yes."

"Well, that is just fan-fucking-tastic, isn't it?" Dean scoffs and shakes his head.

"I can remove the Mark but only from one of you, not both, to ensure that the lock remains unbroken and the Darkness remains banned."

You and Dean look at each other.

"Take it off her," Dean says before he can stop himself.

"What? No, take it off him."

"Y/N, I am not in the mood."

"Neither am I. I took this Mark to bear it with you so you wouldn't do this alone. If it means you get to be free, I'm okay with having it."

Dean steps closer to you and grabs your hands and you look up at him with tears in your eyes.

"I can't let you go through that again. I can't let you be her again."

"And I can't let you be him."

"Only one needs it, the other will be free unless you are giving someone else up to take the burden."

"We can't do that to anyone else," you whimper.

Dean takes another bite of food and moans at the taste.

"What if I told you I could relocate you two somewhere far away, not even on this Earth, where you would still be alive, but no longer a danger to yourself or to others?"

"What?" You look down at your feet as the tears fall from your eyes. "What about our kids?"

"They'll have Sam."

Can I really leave my kids behind to protect them from me? They'd be safe from you, from her. You wouldn't be around to hurt them. Sam's taken care of Joanna for a year before, he can do bit again for the rest of their lives.

"We'll do it," you say to Death, "only if you let us say goodbye to Sam."

"As you wish."

Dean calls his brother and gets him to come to the restaurant. He doesn't know what's going on or why he sounds like this is goodbye so he rushes over as fast as he can. You're standing off to the side looking down while Dean is standing in the middle of the room when Sam enters.

"Dean?"

"I gave it a shot, Sammy."

"What is this?"

"We need to talk."

"Whatever you are thinking of doing, don't. There is another way. You two don't need to go with him. You two don't need to die!"

"We're not going to die, Sam. He's... sending us away."

"Sending you away? What do you mean? Like outer space?" he asks sarcastically.

"No, well, he didn't say outer space."

"This is madness, Dean!"

"Far from it, I'm afraid," Death says.

"No one's asking you," Sam glares.

"Our conundrum is simple, Sam. Your brother and his wife cannot be killed, and the Mark cannot be destroyed, not without inciting a far greater evil than any of us have ever known."

"What evil?"

"Amara, Sam." He looks at you. "He's talking about Amara."

He knows the hell she put you through. Is he willing to release her in order to save you and his brother? I'm not worthy enough to be saved. Please just let me go.

"Even if I remove Dean and Y/N from the playing field, we're still left with you--loyal and dogged--who I suspect will never rest until he sets his brother and his best friend free, will never rest until his brother and his best friend is free of the Mark, which simply cannot happen, lest the Darkness be set free."

"What?" you ask and look at Death. "You said nothing about killing Sam!"

He's not the one who should be dead.

"You traded my life? This isn't you. This doesn't make any sense."

"No, it makes perfect sense if you stop thinking about yourself for one damn minute!" Dean shouts. "Remember when we were in that church, making Crowley human, about to close the Gates of Hell? Well, you sure as hell were ready to die for the greater good then."

"Yeah, and you two pulled me back."

"I was wrong." His voice hardens. "You were right, Sam. You knew that this world would be better without us in it."

Yes, the world would be better off without me in it. Please let me go.

"No, no, no, wait a second. You're twisting my words here, Dean."

"Why? Because we track evil and kill it? The family business? Is that it? Look at the tape, Sam. Evil tracks us and it nukes everything in our vicinity--our family, our friends. It's time we put a proper name to what we really are and we deal with it."

"What about your kids, huh?" Sam looks at you. "What about your kids, Y/N? Who is going to raise them?"

"I'm doing this for them, Sam." I'm poison. I ruin everything I touch. "What if I had gotten to them? What if I hurt them?"

"No, stop it! We are not evil. We're far from perfect but we're good. That thing on your body is evil but not us."

"No, there is no other way, Sam. I'm sorry." Sam punches his brother in the face and Dean nods. "Good, fight."

Dean punches his bother in the face, and you squeeze your eyes shut as you remember what you did to Castiel. The hurt you put on him... for making him choose... I don't deserve to be forgiven. I'm broken. I'm poison. I hate myself. You look down and let tears fall from your cheeks at the words you're telling yourself.

You're blocking out what Sam and Dean are doing as you're stuck inside your own mind. The pain you caused, the people you killed. Death keeps an eye on the brothers and walks over to you.

"I could put a wall up if you wanted me to."

"No, I deserve this."

"No one deserves what you're putting yourself through."

"I do," you whisper. "I--" You shake your head. "It doesn't matter."

You look at the brothers and see Sam on his knees in front of Dean with blood on his face. Death leaves your side and approaches Dean with his scythe.

"Please, do me the honor."

You turn away from the brothers because you can't bear to watch this.

"Close your eyes." A pause. "Sammy, close your eyes."

"No, I want you to look me in the eyes if you're going to kill me. Just know that when you find your way back, I hope you remember what it was like to be good... what it was like to love."

"It's for family that you must proceed, Dean," Death says. "To be what you are, to become what you've become is a stain on their memory. Do it or I will."

Dean grips the scythe and swings it. Sam closes his eyes thinking he will be dead in seconds but Dean passes by his brother and stabs Death in the abdomen with his own scythe. Death looks shocked at what Dean did only to crumble to dust.

"Did you really think I'd kill you?" Dean says and pulls his brother up. You turn to see a pile of dust where Death is standing. "You're a pain in the ass but not enough to kill you."

Sam laughs in relief and Dean turns to you.

"Sweetheart, are you okay?"

No. I don't think I will be.

Crowley got the ingredients easily and came back with Oskar in tow. Rowena smiles when she sees him and pulls him in for a hug.

"You've grown so big. Not too big to give your old auntie Rowena a hug I hope."

"I hope I haven't hurt you."

"Don't think about that one moment. Everything's fine, Oskar. Everything's fine." Rowena looks over his shoulder and glares at her son. She has a fountain pen in her hand that she will use to kill him. "Nobody's hurting anybody." She pulls away from him. "Goodbye, my sweet wee boy."

She takes the pen and stabs it into his neck. Oskar looks shocked at the betrayal and she bends him over so that his blood pours into a metal bowl on the table. Inside the bowl are the other two ingredients which make the spell complete. Oskar falls to the ground and she puts her hands on the table before chanting in Latin.

"Are you okay?" Dean asks his brother.

"I'll live."

You walk over to Sam and lift your hands as if you're going to heal him with your magic. The same magic that hurt people. The same magic that killed people. No, you can't use magic. You lower your hands and your gaze to the floor. Without Death to distract you, you're forced to think about the bad things you've done. You squeeze your eyes shut tightly. I don't deserve to be saved. Please let me go.

"Are you okay, Y/N?" Dean asks.

No. "I guess."

Suddenly, a loud and shrill shrieking sound can be heard.

"Does that sound right to you?" Dean asks.

Red lightning crashes through the roof of the restaurant and strikes Dean's forearm where his Mark is. Another bolt of lightning strikes you where your Mark is. You gasp in pain and almost fall to your knees from how intense it is. It's gone within seconds, taking both your Marks with it. You pull down your shirt and see the last remnants of the Mark fade away.

"They did it. Our Marks are gone," you gasp. Your head feels lighter and free. It's like the darkness that was inside of you faded away with the Mark. That still doesn't undo what you did. Right. "It worked. The spell worked."

You three leave the restaurant slowly, unsure that this is real life.

"This is good. Dean, this is good. The Mark is off your arm. Nothing crazy happened."

"Yeah. I'm sure everything's perfectly fine," Dean says sarcastically.

Suddenly, a loud thunder cracking sounds from above and you look to the sky. Dark red clouds roll in with red lightning striking through the chaos. Lightning strikes the ground, scaring you to your bones, and the clouds are coming your way.

"What the hell did we let out?" Sam asks.

"Amara," you say.

The ground starts rumbling and columns of black smoke erupt from the spots where the red lightning struck. All the columns converge into a huge rolling cloud of black smoke.

"Get in the car. Go, go, go!" Dean urges.

You three run toward the car and pile inside. Dean barely gets it on when the black clouds smash into the car. The Impala lifts off the ground and is overturned, and you slam your head into the side of the car hard, causing you to black out. When you open your eyes, there is a hand outstretched toward you.

Amara stands in front of you with a smile on her face. You take her hand and a jolt of electricity runs through your body. She pulls you to your feet but she doesn't let go of your hand. She chuckles at your terrified look.

"It's nice to finally meet you in person. Thank you for setting me free."

x

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[soleilnomoon]

Prompt: “I don’t like them; I can barely tolerate them.” for Abarai Renji. Once again, I leave it up to you what you wanna do (but maybe enemies to lovers) Yes, I might be on a little Bleach binge right now but it's okay you like it. kiss kiss

*hides face* ok, ok, ok, hear me out, let's pretend i didn't take *insert accurate length of time here* and say i wrote this in a few days. i am so sorry i took forever and ever with this but as u know i can only give u top quality work or else i'll never forgive myself. renji is.......well *motions to him* yk how that man is, he made me suffer!!!! in a good way!!! but still i suffered!!! yk how much i love enemies 2 lovers u big brained beauty 🤭 so ty baby❤️️ also this is my first renji fic and i can't belev it.

5.2k words (don't look at me, just don't), fem reader, nsfw, 18+ mdni, enemies 2 lovers, angst city, angst angst city biiiitch (yk the vibez babey), smut obviously, no fluff bc who do u think i am? feat. renji being a mean petty bitch (i guess that makes him a mean dom maybe yes), sub reader bc that's what i want; there's a party with alcohol, ichigo and co. make brief appearances, bathroom sex, choking (he's sf romantic), a lot of cursing bc they're grown that's why, renji is a beast when he's jealous, reader is a lil bit of a brat but lbr who wouldn't be in that situation; mutual ""unrequited"" pining, lots of tension, fingering, rough (consensual) sex, lil bit of degradation, lil bit of a size kink, lil bit of praise kink, idk there's probably more stuff but i'm so tired rn i can't think; um renji obviously comes w his own gd warning; reader is determined to not let this man win but, hello, it's renji he always comes out on top wink wink. (if u see spelling errors/mistakes no u didn't hottie)

“when i write about all of this it becomes its own kind of violence. / i retell the story as myth, as if it were my own body devoured.” — caitlin scarano & “so much of love is violence. the desire / to be split open, invaded, mangled / and made new.” — erin slaughter

HATRED X TASTES X SWEET

you’ve never been cut out for this line of work, but your insistence on eliminating all your shortcomings is commendable. brave, even. it’s something you don’t really think about unless you want to spend the night half-drunk, rambling about the things you should’ve done but never had the courage to do.

like telling a certain red-haired, bullheaded lieutenant that he’s the most ridiculous and excessively arrogant man you’ve ever come across. all in all, you’re pretty sure telling him off won’t phase him; nothing ever does, not really anyway.

at first you try politeness; your grandmother would be proud of how well you’ve learned to bite your tongue. it’s ungraceful, but you fake it well enough that others think your emotional maturity is far above theirs. little do they know, you actually have to literally bite your tongue; simply remaining silent isn’t easy for you anymore. so, when you bite, it’s with rage, months of unshed tears and accumulated spite; you bite your tongue so hard you bleed more every time.

your unsaid words bunch together — tiny soldiers determined to strike in unison without fail — and sit heavily in the back of your throat, ready to launch forward at your command.

but you never say them, and you choke more than once; an unbearable shame to carry with you as he continues to slash at your patience, thin ribbons cascading off you like confetti. you wonder if your anger will lead to your death— or if it’ll lead to his. you intend to keep all of that hidden, though, and keep reminding yourself that eventually he will tire from berating you, from talking to you as if you’re the most incompetent being in all of soul society, from looking at you like your very being disgusts him.

that’s what you tell yourself these days. you like to conveniently ignore the way his dark eyes linger on yours during meetings — you’ve noticed that people have taken to describing them as soulless, cold and critical, unimpressed at everything and anyone.

but you see him — all of him; the raw, feral, powerful and severe side that not many have the misfortune of knowing. they think they get the real version of renji whenever they deal with him, but they never do; you know that now. you doubt it’s even intentional on his part, or maybe — just maybe — he really does hate you.

to put it plainly, as you’ve told rukia and rangiku, the sixth division lieutenant has the biggest fucking chip on his shoulder. despite the walls he continues to put up to keep others from carving out a place for themselves in his life, despite the way his words roll around his mouth, clumsily coasting down the length of his tongue before they pierce the air around you with their toxicity — you’re tired of the way he purposely singles you out time and time again to point out your inadequacies without remorse.

abarai renji is also sick of dealing with you. whenever he thinks he’s found a means of scaring you off, you scurry right back more determined and more obnoxious than ever. which is rich, coming from him.

he claims you’re inconsequential, a nuisance — a pest, even — one that he intends to get rid of permanently. it’s harsh and he’s more than aware of that, but he finds that this is the most appropriate solution to his problem. he could easily ignore you; he could try to keep his comments to himself and try to be somewhat cordial whenever you cross paths. but he won’t. and he has no damn idea why.

“no, no come in, i have plenty of snacks for everyone.”

rukia’s voice is a constant in his life that he’ll always be thankful for. he watches her glide into the room, grinning at the friends she’s invited over, her laughter like soft bells that is easily recognizable even with all the conversation happening. when he feels his chest constrict, an uncomfortable, yet familiar warmth stretching over his skin, he decides to drink so that he can ignore the sensation and forget.

a feeble attempt, because he knows how this will all end — with him drunk off his ass in an even worse mood than he started.

mouth opening, renji prepares to tell rukia to get better sake, when rangiku leads you into the living room where he’s lounging comfortably. the bottle in his hand grows heavier by the second and suddenly he’s not very interested in drinking anymore. already, his foul mood from earlier returns, and every step you take only fuels his irritation; it bubbles underneath his skin, making him frown and grip the bottle tighter.

you don’t need to look at him to know that he’s glaring at you — he always is. rangiku feigns obliviousness as she encourages you to go make yourself comfortable while she fetches snacks with rukia. you stare at both of them, wide-eyed, confused — a pleading look sliding onto your face after a few moments, but they assure you both that they’ll be back shortly.

with a sigh you sit on the armchair adjacent to him, determined to just remain quiet in the hopes that he’ll just ignore you for once. sitting up straight, discomfort finds its way to the pit of your stomach, swirling around as you fidget with the bracelet around your wrist. his eyes watch your movements with an obsessiveness that startles him; there’s no reason why he should be interested in the shape of your fingers, there’s no reason why he should be interested in the way you keep brushing stray curls away from your face, and there’s no reason why he should be interested in possibly fucking you when he knows for a fact that he is absolutely uninterested in you.

his disinterest runs so deep it spoils the taste of the sake, but he takes another swig anyway. the alcohol burns as it travels swiftly down his throat, and it just so happens that you glance over at him — innocuous, an attempt to gauge his annoyance level — as his throat bobs and your mouth dries at the sight.

you turn your face away quickly, a traitorous flush crawling slowly along your skin, unjustly warming your cheeks. inhaling deeply, you do your best to will the blush away to no avail. where the hell are rukia and rangiku? surely it can’t take that long to grab snacks. you’re tempted to go find them, but you have a sinking feeling that it would turn you into a coward.

and you refuse to give that man any more ammo against you.

IT’S X (NOT) X YOU

what initially starts as a small get-together, quickly turns into a party; leave it to rangiku to liven things up, her laughter infectious and whimsical, flitting about like a persistent hummingbird as she encourages everyone to play drinking games with her. experience taught him better than to engage because despite his high tolerance, there’s really no beating rangiku when she’s on a roll.

but when you emphatically agree to play with the rest, fury rises in his chest; your audacity, it seems, knows no bounds — and, yes, he understands the hypocrisy in his critique. he just doesn’t care.

the games are every bit as simple and ridiculous as you thought they’d be, but as everyone seems to be in relatively good spirits, you play along. not normally competitive with things like this, you get into the swing of things when you win round after round.

cheers resound nearby at your success, but throughout the evening, you feel renji’s stare and do everything in your power to not give in and look back at him. a tough feat to say the least, as you are always acutely aware of his presence; and when you do happen to sneak another glance, his legs are spread and you curse under your breath for finding that attractive.

foolish, you chide, so fucking foolish.

renji sucks his teeth as he feels a heaviness in his head; groaning loudly he swirls around what little sake he has left in his glass before finishing it.

“you lose again,” rukia’s voice is soft and teasing, but he’s annoyed and can’t be bothered with talking to her right now. she pats his shoulder gingerly before standing up to head to the kitchen. his mind is a mess and he blames you for it completely.

“i don’t fucking care,” he says gruffly to her retreating figure, not bothering to elevate his voice as he’s sure she heard him. and he really doesn’t care; he’s trying to tell himself to calm down, but he can’t.

the fault completely lies with you — of course it does, everything you do agitates every cell in his body. the reason is simple, and he hates that he doesn’t want to admit it — he’s so undeniably attracted to you that it pisses him off. he takes in your appearance for the twelfth time that night, admiring the softness of your cheeks, the fullness of your lips, the way you seem entirely too animated as you laugh at someone’s lame joke — and yes, he can tell it’s not funny from how your laughter dies down after a few seconds.

if he had better sense, he’d stop looking at you, but he can’t now; he might blame the sake for this later.

the intensity behind his gaze is enough to bring an inextinguishable heat along your skin. it’s only unpleasant because it travels down to your lower abdomen and brings about an agonizing ache between your thighs. at first, you do the sensible thing and ignore it; but the longer he stares, the more you want to look over, until finally you can’t take it anymore.

“i’ll be back,” you mumble to the other guests, although you doubt they hear you with how rowdy everyone is being; the noise isn’t unwelcomed, the distraction serves to mask your footsteps when you scurry from the living room to the back corridor, turning corner after corner until you find the bathroom.

a coward — that’s what you are.

you barricade yourself in there without thinking, heart pounding loud enough to disorient you. after several long minutes, you splash water on your face and take a few deep breaths.

“i can’t believe i ran away,” your voice is so soft you barely hear the words — almost as if you’re still in disbelief over the entire situation. there’s something off about renji tonight; the tension between you was more palatable and tangible than normal.

even though you feigned nonchalance as best as you could, there were so many moments where you couldn’t help but watch him too. pitiful. absolutely pitiful. there’s no excuse for it, and yet you struggle to find one anyway.

as you look at your reflection in the mirror above the sink, you try to convince yourself to head back out there. sooner or later, people will realize that you’ve gone missing — and rangiku is nosy enough and like a bloodhound when she’s drunk. your time is incredibly limited now.

there’s no reason for you to continue to avoid the inevitable, so you sigh and give yourself a small pep talk before heading back outside.

TRUTH X OR X …

renji’s mood doesn’t improve at all; in fact, it worsens the moment ichigo sits right next to him. he’s not even sure why this sets him off, but even closing his eyes and counting backwards does nothing to keep him calm.

with slight difficulty, renji grits out, “what do you want?”

undeterred, ichigo stares at renji pointedly, voice steady as he says, “you could go after her, you know.”

again, renji sucks his teeth loudly, arms folded against his chest, right leg bouncing slightly as he taps his foot on the floor. punching ichigo would be pointless, and then rukia would get involved and he doesn’t have time to deal with the fallout from that so he keeps his hands to himself.

besides, his anger is obviously misdirected right now. he knows — he knows —but he doesn’t care, so he doesn’t mince his words when he responds with, “go after who?” through his peripheral, he can see ichigo’s patience has also reached its limit.

“you’re not that stupid, so stop acting like it.”

normally, renji would take the opportunity to mes s around and argue back and forth, but he might actually fight his friend if he doesn’t walk away. so, he does; abrupt and without looking back, footsteps heavy on the hardwood floor.

maybe he just needs to change his approach with you, maybe talking things out would work in his favor; or maybe he needs to fuck you hard enough to purge you from his mind.

he lies to himself when he considers the first option, because it’s the second option that drives him to walk a little faster, head full of impossible thoughts as he wonders just how far you’d let him go.

when renji finally finds you, you’re in the middle of rebuffing the advances of an unfamiliar guest — they’re drunk, handsy, and keep oscillating between giving you cheesy pick-up lines and berating you for rejecting them. but you stand firm, and your voice is relatively loud when you tell them, “for the last fucking time, go away.”

under normal circumstances, renji would let you handle this yourself; he has no desire to play prince charming or be a knight in shining armor. you’re more than capable, and he’s seen the way you fight and argue to defend yourself — but, it’s when they place a wandering hand on your hip that he loses sight of all of that.

a brief moment passes, where your blood boils as you contemplate how best to kick their ass, but you never get the chance. a rather large shadow hovers over you both, but you already know who it is without having to look properly.

renji is a force to be reckoned with on a good day, but he’s at his fucking limit right now.

he doesn’t ask, doesn’t give any options for retreat, doesn’t say a word when he yanks them off with a brute strength that surprises even you.

now, can he really be blamed for throwing them into the neighboring wall hard enough to make a noticeable hole? and is it really his fault that the drunk can hardly walk as they clutch their broken arm while murmuring something unintelligible, something that renji takes as a sign of them wanting a repeat demonstration?

consequences be damned, he gives the drunk a lethal look before they scramble away in fear.

“loser,” he says loud enough for them to hear, but they don’t double back or even try to go toe-to-toe with the hot-headed lieutenant. you watch, half-amused and half-impressed with the unnecessary machismo, but still, you know better than to chastise him right now, especially when your heart sputters out of control from his proximity.

“…thanks,” you say, a faint flush on your cheeks, voice soft, head fuzzy when you realize that renji — aka mr. “i’ll fight you on everything any day of the week unprovoked for no reason other than to drive you crazy” — saved you. unprompted at that.

you make the mistake of looking up at him, your nerves prompting you to take a small step back when you realize that the usual hostility that renji reserves for you specifically is nowhere to be found. in its place is something more unreadable — or, rather, you don’t want to read into it for fear of being wrong.

renji steps closer, which makes you back up again until your back hits the wall and you’re no longer able to escape.

“we need to talk,” he says suddenly, but you shake your head, non-verbally objecting to the idea, curls bouncing wildly with your exaggerated movements. since he knows he’s pressed for time, he grabs your face with his large hand and stops you from moving. “that wasn’t a request.”

swallowing rusty nails would be better than dealing with your conflicting feelings over renji right now, because he’s much too close to you and now you’re forgetting why it is you hate him in the first place. ironically, he’s in the exact same position. so far, he’s acted on impulse over you more times than he can count tonight, but he supposes that’s to be expected — you are a wildcard, after all.

“what if i don’t want to.” your response is clumsy, the words tumbling one after the other. “what if i want you to leave?” you don’t actually mean that, but you throw it at him anyway, to see if maybe this was all a fluke, and maybe, just maybe he’ll remember himself and you both can go back to fighting like usual.

he considers your question, goes so far as to release your face to wrap his hand around your throat instead. your sharp inhale and parted lips tell him all he needs to know.

with a slightly raised brow, he asks, “well, do you?”

because if you do, he’ll walk away right now. but he knows what your answer will be, he just has to drag it out of you. he squeezes your neck to remind you to hurry it up, and before you can answer him properly, he places his leg in between yours, pressing close enough that you roll your hips forward while whimpering softly.

he really didn’t think any of this through, but luckily the adrenaline from it all won’t wear off anytime soon, so he’ll improvise along the way. he spent most of the night dealing with a semi-hard cock that wouldn’t listen to reason no matter how many times he tried to stop thinking about you. but now? all of that restraint goes out of the window, and before he can question it, he kisses you.

you’ve kissed plenty of people in your life — some good, most were mediocre and uninspiring — but renji actually takes your breath away. everything about him commands all your attention; from the way his lips move against yours greedily, leaving behind burning kisses that make your nipples harden underneath your clothes — to the way he thrusts his tongue in between your plush lips, licking inside of your mouth hotly, igniting an inextinguishable flame deep inside of you.

he grabs your hip with his free hand, squeezing hard, fingers digging firmly. all the irritation from earlier dissipates completely, leaving you feeling lightheaded and needy; you grind against him recklessly, arousal dampening the front of your panties, clit sensitive as it rubs against the delicate fabric. his cock presses against you — thick, long, and hard — and you wonder if this is why he’s so angry with you all the time.

was it always that simple?

if you asked the question aloud, he wouldn’t know what to tell you — it’s a combination of things, but mostly he’s an idiot; he knows that now, but likewise you’re an idiot too. you just don’t realize it yet.

it’s renji who pulls away first, lightly panting, breath warm against your lips as he releases his hold on your neck. he doesn’t know where he finds the strength to string together a coherent statement, but his voice is low and husky when he speaks. “answer my question.”

you blink at him, completely in a daze, lips slightly swollen from all the kissing. “wh-what?” you don’t remember what he asked you, and you don’t care.

“do you want me to leave?”

for some reason, you completely forgot that you told him that. you rub your lips together and run your hands along his chest. “no.” the answer comes out automatically, without hesitation, and that’s all the encouragement he needs.

“good.”

SAY X IT X LOUDER

he picks you up with ease, almost as if you weigh nothing; a small squeal spills out of you as you wrap your legs around his waist, and renji gives you a sly smile — one laced with mischief and an unspoken promise of what’s to come.

you’re back in the bathroom again, this time sitting on the counter with renji standing in between your legs. his hands coast along your curvy hips and down your thighs. he’s touching you but he’s not touching you and it’s driving you crazy.

with hurried, eager hands you both undress, and for the umpteenth time you internally curse this style of uniform; still, it doesn’t take too long before his hands are on you again, calloused palms rough and warm against your skin. he places a kiss on your jaw, then another on your neck right underneath your earlobe; each kiss he leaves behind distorts your common sense, makes you feel irrational and impatient. your hands are soft and well-practiced, stroking his stiff cock as his hips jerk forward from your touch.

he can’t remember the last time someone had him this worked up, which pisses him off a little; because that means him fucking you once won’t settle things. at that thought, renji bites your neck and your startled yelp quickly morphs into a moan when he runs his tongue along the mark. he dips his hand in between your thighs, rubbing his thick fingers against your slit. a loud banging on the door has you looking over, and you can’t remember if he bothered to lock it once you both were inside.

your attention nearly falters, but when he pinches your clit you buck your hips, a shiver shooting down your spine at the slight pain.

“eyes on me,” is all he says, seemingly annoyed that you would dare to focus your attention elsewhere, “always keep them on me.” what he means by that, he doesn’t know, but you take the command at face value and nod while swallowing. he slides a finger inside of your wet pussy, and while you initially wanted to keep quiet to avoid suspicion and to prevent anyone from intruding, but you can’t now.

“renji,” you breathe, fingers trembling as you hold onto the counter for support, he thrusts his finger in and out, quick and hard, before inserting another. you clench around him, hips rocking forward as he fingerfucks you and grinds his palm against your clit. you close your eyes and moan louder than you mean to, chest heaving, thoughts jumbled and incoherent. he scissors his fingers inside of you, but quickly removes them without prompting.

“fuck!” you open your eyes again and stare at him in disbelief. “why did you stop?”

he laughs darkly and grabs your face roughly, fingers pressing into your soft skin without remorse. “what did i tell you earlier?” everything about this situation is laughable. he gave you very specific instructions, ones he thought were easy enough for you to follow. for some reason your movements are sluggish, mind in a haze as you scramble to remember but nothing comes to mind.

as you open and close your mouth, looking every bit as adorable as you are alluring, he decides to show you a bit of kindness.

“get down.” his command comes swift, his patience practically nonexistent; precum glides down the head of his thick cock, but he ignores it for the sake of teaching you a lesson. you don’t bother waiting for him to repeat himself and slide off the counter. “turn around.”

like a doll, your movements are dictated by renji with simple, short statements. nothing about that phases you, though; it’s all very exciting, so when you do turn to face the counter, you bend forward and lean over the counter. renji admires the roundness of your ass and slaps it hard.

again, you find yourself moaning loudly, without shame and not caring about the volume of your voice. surely the others won’t pay attention, as they’re still very drunk and are entertaining themselves with more games. another slap on your ass has you grabbing onto the counter again, legs shaking, arousal dripping between your thighs in anticipation. if renji doesn’t fuck you soon, you might actually die.

he knows he’s taking too damn long, but it’s much more interesting making you work for him. he rubs the tip of his cock against your puffy pussy, gliding it in between your slick folds, your moans sweetly wrapping around him once he pushes inside of you slowly. someone bangs on the door again, making you look over, anxiety quickly filling your head with unnecessary what ifs that almost command your full attention.

with narrowed eyes, renji grabs onto your hair, curls soft in his hand, and yanks hard.

“the fuck did i say earlier?”

goosebumps travel down your arms as a different kind of awareness and clarity surges through you quickly. you blink at your reflection, watching the way he towers over you, his muscles hard and defined — sculpted from years of training and dedication to honing his skills. it hits you then, what he’s really asking you.

“to,” you swallow thickly, throat dry, “to keep my eyes on you always.” you say it all in one breath, gasping when he runs his tongue along the curve of your ear. you don’t know how much more you can take, but you know if you complain, if you say anything he might stop altogether.

renji’s smile is wicked and dark, his lips graze your earlobe, voice deep and gravelly, a huskiness that wasn’t there before as he thrusts into you, burying his cock deeply.

“good girl.”

he refrains from kissing you properly, instead pushing you down so you can lean over the counter again. your mind melts from it all, and you’re panting, heart beating faster and faster as he firmly places a hand on your back.

“you’re squeezing me so tight,” he remarks thoughtfully, although you note the slight strain in his voice; as much as he tries to act like he’s not that affected by you, you know that isn’t the case at all. your pussy is every bit as enticing and heavenly as he knew it would be; he pulls back and slams his cock into you all over again, filling you completely. you try to keep watching him in the mirror, but he’s fucking you like he’s angry with himself for being so attracted to you.

and he absolutely is. it’s a truth he fought against for so long that he’s given up on denying it now. your moans drip onto his skin like caramel, sticky and sweet, and when you say his name like that — your voice going higher and higher from the ferocity of his thrusts — he nearly loses his mind.

“fuck,” he says out loud, grabbing your hip roughly, your wetness coating the length of his cock, “you’re taking me so well.” he knows you can’t really answer him, and he likes that; you’re beyond caring at this point, instead focusing on the way his cock reaches a spot that has you bouncing your ass and fucking yourself against him. normally, renji would play around and edge you in retaliation, but he’s too far gone, completely under the spell of your pretty pussy, with how soft and tight it is.

you’re not sure how you got here, but you’re drowning in ecstasy right now. he instructs you to lift your leg to rest it onto the counter, pulling out momentarily to help you position and spread your legs further apart. he plunges his cock into you again, keeping his hips closer as he gives you shorter, frenzied thrusts. your head spins and you can’t think straight, but that doesn’t matter. all you care about is the way renji is angling his hips, rolling them forward to pound into your cunt roughly, balls heavy as they smack against your ass.

“oh, oh, oh.” you swear your life flashes before your eyes, because something possesses him, his strokes shorter, brutal, and frenetic. drool slides down your chin, your voice hoarse from how loud you’ve been. you’re sure someone’s heard you by now, but you don’t care.

how can you?

with renji fucking you like this — merciless and possessive, fingers brusing your skin, almost as if he wants to make sure you’ll be as obsessed with him as he is with you — your common decency, your morals, everything that makes you you, they don’t exist.

all that’s left is this burning desire to let him have his way with you for as long as he wants. thankfully, you have enough sense to not admit that out loud; who knows what kind smugness you’ll be subjected to if renji knew.

but you’re pretty damn transparent about it, he can tell from the way you can’t stop clenching your pussy around his cock, from how your pussy makes loud, lewd squelching noises — ones that he’ll commit to memory so he can revisit them from time to time.

tears roll down your cheeks and you sob as you hold onto the counter as best as you can, back arching, hips rocking against him with a neediness you never knew you had. there’s a tightening in your stomach and your pulse skyrocketing as a flash of white practically blinds you. he watches the way your pussy keeps swallowing the length of his cock, and you finally fall over the edge, orgasm suffocating you with its intensity.

your cunt flutters around him, gummy walls soft and hypnotic, an addiction he never thought he’d have; breathing heavily, his muscles tense and renji groans something that suspiciously sounds like your name. the thought alone makes your face burn and warms your chest in a way that doesn’t make sense. and when he finally cums, he humps into you, cum thick and hot as it spills inside your pussy, mixing with your slick wetness. a completely messy affair, but he doesn’t care — it’s not his bathroom, after all.

legs trembling, you’re limp and incapable of movement, whimpering and whining until he finally pulls out of you.

renji runs a hand down his face, feeling spent but more than satisfied. suddenly his shoulders aren’t so tight and tense, and his mood is much more tolerable. you do your best to stand but almost fall — your legs are useless, turned to jelly because of the man behind you. he chuckles at that, then clears his throat once he realizes. he fully expected there to be a moment of awkwardness after, but it never comes. when he sees your face — lips bruised and swollen, face flushed, eyes glazed with a faraway look — he feels compelled to kiss you again. so, he does. it’s not sweet, nor is it tender, but it still makes your heart swell all the same. he holds you close as you wrap your arms around his neck, doing your best to keep standing, even though your legs are ready to give out.

you don’t know exactly what any of this means, but you do understand him a bit better now. he’s terrible with expressing himself, but you kind of like that about him; and maybe this isn’t the healthiest relationship, but life was uncertain and you’d take renji fucking you like it’s his last day alive over him openly hating you any day.

[undressmewithyoureyes]

KING - (TWO)

KONIG

From the first time I saw her, I had to have her. Dead or alive, it doesn't matter. Dead, I would be the most feared man and a fucking legend. Alive, she would learn to love me and we could run the world ourselves. I just needed to play my cards right. So far, I’ve folded each hand. 

Ive sat back and waited - watched her from afar to know her. Figure her out. Knowing a person and how they operate is deadly enough, but being able to figure out a persons intentions before they do it, can make them a puppet on your hand. And I want her on her knees looking up into mine as she whimpers from my hands. You don’t know how many times I have fell asleep with multiple scenarios of how I am going to make that happen. 

Most fear me. I would too if I seen a 6’10 guy heading straight at me with nothing but pure anger through the soulless windows on his face. Granted, thats the only thing that you will ever see on me - unless I let you. Even then, its a death sentence. Everyone knows who I am, just like Widow. Im the Colonel of Kortac. A war machine that stops at nothing to get shit done…and to get who I want. 

“Any luck?” My right hand man, Three asks me. 

“No, but where close,” I respond. He got the name Three because he wears glasses and one of the lenses he lost in combat. Still to this day, he only has one lens. He’s my sniper and funny thing is, the eye he depends on is the lensless eye. Ironic. 

Three nods at me and I look back through my scope. Im feeling my balls off out here in the fucking snow. We followed Widow down here. I got a lead saying she was headed in this direction to take care of someone - but from the looks of it, she seems to be a bit greedy. 

A woman with an appetite. I like it.

“You know she isn’t going to come willingly,” Three says reminding me of how desperate I am.

I give a low chuckle, “I don’t give a fuck if she comes willingly. I’ll drag her by her hair for however long I see fit until she realizes my side is the winning side.” I give a brief pause, looking at her slice a guys throat open. The others in front not even knowing whats about to happen. “But best believe,” I say looking over at Three, “She’s going to be coming regardless.” 

The breathy laugh he gives tells me he knows I'm not talking about walking or following me anywhere. I look back through my scope as I hear shots fired in the distance. She toyed with he first two, now she’s ready to wrap this shit up. 

“When do you want to move in?” Three asks. 

I wait a few seconds before answering, “Not today. Its not the right time.” I hear him exhale an aggravated sigh, “Trust me, I want to - but I need her right where I want her.” And an open area is not it. 

From what I have witnessed, she is a goddess where men bow at her feet and plead with their lives just for her to take it. She gives no mercy and whether its open area or close combat, you’re going to die either way - or at least wish you were dead. She’s immaculate at both, but you have a zero chance of surviving in the open. 

One of her tactics I have noticed is she preys on her prey. She likes playing with her food before she takes a bite - which ironically is something I also enjoy. And something she will soon find out. She makes her opponent weak, giving her the upper hand - but there have been occasions where she digs right in and heads straight for dessert. Fuck the main meal - kind of like today. She toyed with he first two, then shot the rest before going to the vehicles. 

She fascinates me. Always had. A woman of all people who outranks any man when they are in her presence is hot enough, but one that anyone in the world knows and fears - it makes my dick hard just thinking about it. Thats true power. She lives her life in secret and no matter how often you search, you will never find anything on her. Just her name…Widow. 

“Why she leave the door open?” Three asks pulling me from my thoughts. Fuck what they have said about us men with it being cold outside. Im quite the opposite and could say that my dick is frozen, thats how hard she makes me. 

I look back through my scope and chuckle, “She’s playing with her food.” I can see out of the corner of my eye Three look at me, “I bet any amount of money that there is someone in there who is on the brink of dying.” 

“So why doesn’t she just kill them?” Ah, the questions we all want to know. I know, not because I asked, but because I have the same demented mind as she does. Suffering. 

Without taking my eye off her as I watch her get into the first SUV that crashed, “Theres nothing better than watching the life drain from someones eyes. Someone who doesn’t deserve to live. Better yet, hearing their screams in the distance because something else has done the work for you.” I remove my face from the scope and look into Three’s icy blue eyes, “We started the timer on their life, but were not the ones who stop it and God knows how long it will take. The longer the better.”

Three has been around me to know how I am and how sick in the mind I can be, but watching a woman do it, its unheard of. Sure, theres women in the field who torture the people they capture, but nothing compares to her. And I think thats why everyone is so fucking scared of her or will barely mention her name. She’s fucking ruthless and the shit she does to people makes the hardest men in the fields squirm. But me, I crave it. I need more. 

Three looks back through his scope and I hear the sound of whipping coming though the air. I point my rifle up and see a helicopter heading this way. Nikolai. He lands the helo and I watch him help her load her things up. She stands there for a few minutes and I can tell they are exchanging words. A strike of jealousy runs through me. Soon is what I have to keep telling myself. 

They both load in the helo and take off in the same direction Nik came. Once I know were in the clear, I motion for Three to get up and we head towards the SUVs. I want to know what caused my little devil to come out here. 

Three and I make our way to the murder scene - the temperature dropping steadfast. Our boots crunch in the thick snow and its coming down heavier now. “Go ahead and call Jay for exile.” Three nods and clicks the coms on his vest and tells Jay to come pick us up. 

I reach the first SUV to us - the second one to crash - and take a peek inside. A man sits in the back seat with blood seeping out of his stomach and also both of his knees. Ouch. 

“Ple-Please!” He begs. Tears and snot running down his face. His skin now pale - even grey looking. It wont be long. “Please help me!”

Before I can ask, Three speaks up, “What happened?” 

The man seems baffled that were asking questions instead of helping him like he pleaded. “Th-This crazy bit-“ I don’t give him time to finish the sentence before I shoot a bullet between his eyes. Regardless what her reasoning was, she did it for a reason, but nobody is going to speak about my girl like that. 

Three doesn’t even question me as to why I did it. He stopped asking me shit years ago and I guess he just realized on day, I do whatever the fuck I want to do. Just like a king does. I may not be an heir or royalty, but Kortac is my fucking kingdom and I am the ruler of it all. 

I walk to the first SUV and see a man slumped over in the driver seat. He’s alive, but barely. I recognize him. His face has came across my screen before. Robert Eager. First time I read his name, I snorted to myself. His parents fucking hated him. 

He slowly lifts his head off the steering wheel and looks in my direction - his eyes growing wide when he sees me. Just like Widow, everyone knows who I am too. A black loose mask with two bleached lines under my eyes - as if im crying blood and it dried. The one. The only. Konig. 

Robert begins to shake his head and I know thats a silent plea. Like most, I don’t give a fuck when your life is in my hands. I smirk, knowing he can’t tell except for my eyes squinting. I’ll leave this one to suffer. He deserves it, but even to me thats a loose punishment. 

Once again, Three doesn’t question and by this time, Jay is dropping the helo. We board and he asks where were headed. I pull out my phone from my from vest and click on my tracking app. While my little devil was toying with her prey, I was toying with her. 

“Back to base,” I tell him and put my phone back in my vest. Its almost time for us to personally meet and I feel that its going to be a fight. I feel my dick rubbing against my pants just thinking about how its probably going to go - and I hope its as rough as I picture it to be.

[syrakhanistan]

I close (Eyes Open)

===

i blink, and

i find myself walking through the trees in a snowy forest, gales blustering.

i look down at my feet, brushing the dirt from my shoes. it is not snow; it is ash.

i look forwards, and find myself staring at a lone grave, the name long since faded, lettering in symbols i don’t recognise, yet i know whose grave it is. a small white creature stares at me atop it, red orbs judging me, it’s words poison and apathy in equal measures.

i blink, and

===

the girl opposite me moves her pawn, taking a bishop i had left idle for too long, burning golden eyes judging me silently, human emotion long lost and left to die

a single move, i lose a whole fleet, several hundred thousand souls gone with a swift motion, ornate crafts burning into the atmosphere of a gas giant, existing now only as coffins

once, she would have cared, cried even. i was the one who took that privilege from her. i do not regret it.

i blink, and

===

i find myself holding down a dozen open wounds. i cannot keep doing it like this.

two knights follow me, their footsteps keeping pace, flaming spears and icy swords cutting me another few thousand times, i laugh it off, my howl is not my own, the third knight warns the others, but the warning comes too late as the laugh begins to wane.

i blink, and

===

i stand atop a loose pile of bricks, the path behind drenched in blood, the creature whose neck i throttle still squirming, the not-life merely only attempting to gain sympathy in the death rattle.

it gains sympathy not from myself, but from the girl whose face i can no longer remember, tears falling, cries out to help the creature. she doesn’t, can’t, understand that this murder is yet another gift, a gift for her

i blink, and

===

the ruins of the city i once called home are being reduced to atoms, a tree-like structure impaling a crying omen, fire rains like tears from lost clouds, the heavens have opened and she hates us.

i look down at my knees, ignoring the soulless praise given by the alien next to me, these are not tears on my cheeks, they are blood from her, heaven sent as it roars aloft, the sky is open, the stars already dimming, and

i blink, and

===

my ruined legs cannot stand, i find my body crawling desperately on the dusty rocky surface, watching space itself be torn asunder by the falling star,

a comet of pure despair streaks past, hell itself born from heaven, a darkness that brings light, i scream but no sound comes out as the explosion expands, a second big bang, a new universe opens her arms but not for me.

i blink, and

===

i laugh to myself, staring at it. yet somewhere nearby, they search for me, angry shouts, bullets fired, walls broken and bombs dropped.

i dont care anymore. i look at myself in the broken mirror, i no longer recognise the grim dark haired girl reflected back.

i watch as she begins to fall apart, hair going grey before dropping entirely, flesh coming off the bones, blood evaporating into flame as soon as it comes, eyes piercing, teeth gritted, she is coming, and she will bring love that burns,

the girl in the mirror hates it all, yet i cannot feel anything at all, even as i watch my body be flayed alive, rope around the skeleton’s neck, pulling her away from the mirror, strung up and burned as the devil that i am, a thousand lances and ten thousand daggers carving me up, yet i will still live

i watch the crowd kill one another, begging for her mercy even as i try to tell them that her salvation no longer matters, claws of hate scratching into my soul, there isn’t anything left to love here, a plan shattered, a devil brought down and a god lost to memory, i loved her once but she forgot,

i blink, and

===

the graves are endless, the rain is dust.

i fail, i fall, i endure, yet what for?

name after name, life after life, all burned and buried for her, she can’t remember me because she is long gone, fourteen score and ten thousand fall, a drop in my bucket, all for naught

she calls for me, i ignore her still, her grip on my neck, warm and pure, eyes full of equal parts hate and warmth, there is nothing she can do, neither can i, we play the part in a story that continues without end

ten thousand graves, a hundred thousand more, it will continue on and on with nothing to gain, this cycle will repeat even as we both move on, again and again we continue the path, rising and falling to become gods and devils, the narrative fades, the words no more

i place the flowers on the grave, her statue mourns, she is still here, waiting for me, but i cannot, will not join her, not until i am sure

she loved me, I love her, yet as sure as the sun rises, i will fall, even as the sky above the graves begins to burn crimson

i blink, and

===

wings of night burn brighter than the sky. the stars have long since died, my feet treading their dust, the last place at the end of it all, glass scars across the wastes ignorant of the fall

the endless desert is all that’s left. my wings stretch far and wide, dripping hate, despair made manifest in an endless war.

i looked up at the bright, starless and sunless sky, empty of everything yet still so warm. yet i am so much less, so much emptier than it.

i found a new reason. a love for her. and a hate for all else.

i held my breath, wings quivering, as skies and heaven fell once more, the cycle continuing on and on, body broken, soul lost, doubt and reason all gone, the desert is myself, and i am death, the devil and evil forged and dust

i am no longer me, yet I still live, time and time again, laughing and crying, hate and love have become the same, my crimes continue and the blood is spilled, an infinite void becomes my slumber, i snap my fingers, haughty laugh in my ears,

she is still here, warmer than i, yet she is nothing, greater than i, i rejected her embrace, gave it my all, held her tight, the cycle repeats, over and over, desert and world burning and bright,

my wings unfold, new reason unbound, the plan rewritten, fallen from on high, you and i we have been through that, this fate is not ours, yet time and time again the wind howls, calling our name, but she can no longer recognise us, for she is not ours, a memory long lost and forgot.

i blink, and

===

You wake up with a start.

Your nails are bloody, piercing through the covers, right into your hands; you’re soaked with sweat.

It’s… been a while since you’ve dreamt anything at all. You unclench a fist, your shield arm, and brush hair from your eyes.

One ‘eye’ is bleeding. Black ooze drips onto the bed. The arm where your shield is, incorporeal or not, feels the burning weight of metal, an unheard ticking in your ear, while your other ‘arm’ is numb, veins hard and blackened.

You bend over, and realise what you feel is pain. You barely remember the sensation these days; there’s a distinct knot in your stomach, and you double over in the bed, clutching at the covers to steady yourself.

You’d been warned by others, terrestrial and spectral alike, that the objects would take their toll on you.

Ha. Preaching to the choir. You KNEW all too well the consequences these wretched things brought you, brought anyone who committed the sun of using these unholy items. That’s why you continued to wear them, endlessly; to remind yourself of the Truth, and to keep their despair contained to yourself.

At least, that was your initial justification. These days, you’re not too sure.

You manage to summon the Shield, and open the inventory, hoping and praying it’ll dispense some miracle painkiller.

Out comes a single torpedo-type cigar, gold-leaf branding identifying it as a [REDACTED] No. 2A, specially made by the [REDACTED] company for certain foreign dignitaries and people of importance. Medium-bodied and mild, with a soft but distinct smell of a twig bonfire and warm coffee.

Is… Is the Shield fucking with you right now? You kicked the habit years ago, even if it had been your favourite brand. Still… you do appreciate the joke.

You grimace and bear the pain, dismissing your pyjamas with a flick of the wrist to summon your Uniform, to appear at least somewhat dignified and presentable (or, more importantly, actually awake).

You cough, clearing your throat to speak while you open the blinds, the Earth slowly waking up in the distance and rising like the Sun. “Servitor #765348, activation.” You request quietly.

A mechanical whir, and a small vent pops open. “By your command.” The floating skull intones with a grinding metallic flourish.

“Firstly, how many on the base are awake…?” You query.

“Activation of Routine Seven-Two-One: According to surveillance request: Three-quarters of your Legion are currently asleep, my liege. The rest… three, including your Equerry, are doing regular maintenance checks in exosphere, one is chatting on her computer-machine, and the other is performing unnecessary physical activities to—” The servitor begins to explain.

You raise a hand to cut it off. “Ah, ah ah—! I get it. Thank you. Please replace my bed covers post-haste, and interface with the base’s transportation and doors to ensure that my patrol is not interrupted. I… want some time to myself.”

“By your will, most beneficiant one.” The skull replies, before whizzing off someplace else.

You scratch your head, idly curling a single strand of hair around a finger, as you slowly limp out of your office-cross-bedroom, trying to get a little more limber to wake yourself off and distract yourself from the ache.

The ache, and the whispers.

…

You’re idly pacing through the clinical, sterile white halls of the base when you find a particularly marvellous view out a window.

The Egg, ever ominously hovering above the Gate, was perfectly in line with the rising Earth, which in turn was (almost) perfectly in front of the Sun. You didn’t have your fliphone on you, nor a camera - and besides, the Egg’s interference would probably mess up a photo - so you try to capture the moment in your mind.

It’s… quite lovely. You stare deeply into the view. You know all too well not to gaze deep into the menacing thing, nor to look directly at the Sun, yet… It calls to you, singing a wonderful song.

You try humming along, but… It’s not a true melody. It’s a beat, a joyful tune, a rhythm from the heart asking you to join in, fighting for attention and—

“Hazuki-chan, that’s an… interesting tune.” A familiar voice whispers into your ear.

You flail around, eyes wide, only to nearly tread on the feet of your raven-haired Equerry, who bounces softly away, giggling.

“Ah, sorry! Didn’t mean to startle. I just got back from regular repair exercises a little early.” Vintage Karasawa laughs warmly.

You breathe a sigh of relief, instantly calming down, and smile back. “Ah, Vintage. Sorry, I… was enraptured by the view.”

She nods, and comes back to stand next to you, looking out to the sunny space outside. “You know… Apparently some human astronauts get bored of this view.”

You snort a little; you can imagine the few members on a space station, a tiny little dot barely visible to you (which wouldn’t be visible to the naked human eye from this distance) probably had a few that matched that description.

As she speaks, she briefly looks down at one of your hands.

Ah, shit - you weren’t wearing the Claw. Even now, the ‘hand’ still hadn’t calmed down from early; the ends were still purple, something like bone almost visible under stretched skin.

You cough, and hide it under your cloak. “Vintage-san…”

She shakes her head, still smiling. “You said ‘-chan’ just a moment ago! No take backs.”

She moves closer. “You’re still trying so hard, aren’t you? The burdens of leadership are bad enough without… well, those particular burdens.”

You shake your head. “I have to. You know how it is.”

Vintage nods once more, smile fading beneath dark-bagged eyes. “I know, I know. Keep at it, if that’s what you want. But… just remember to keep up appearances.”

“I am well aware, my Equerry.” You tut authoritatively. “I would suggest keeping your opinions to yourself.”

A chuckle. “Ha! That’s the spirit.” She says, placing a hand on your shoulder. You… don’t recoil at the touch of familiarity.

You both look out to the view, to the Egg and beyond.

“It… It is a beautiful view, though.” You whisper thoughtfully.

A solemn nod is all you get in response.

You open your shield, dispensing a digital watch, as a thought passes your mind by. The time and date…

Ah, you do suppose it’s close to time.

“Shall we get to work? I know it’s a bit early… Maybe we get breakfast first?” You ask.

Karasawa scoffs. “Always the heavy-handed taskmaster. I had the night shift, remember?” She says, pacing away, before turning her head back to you.

“I won’t say no to breakfast, though. I hear the new Chef robot has dinosaur-shaped pancakes!” She says, grinning.

You laugh at this. “Classic!”

Another day at the office begins, and you quickly forget the dreams of someone you used to know, even as the Egg watched on in thoughtful silence, and another gaze from within the abyssal Gate mocked and jeered in your ear.

Just another day.

[inbetweenimperfectmusings]

Who am I when no one is looking?

In the hospital stairwell by myself

I stare at the sky standing still,

I could be there for an hour, maybe two,

But the door cracks open from the flight above,

I keep walking like I never stopped.

In the common room 

6pm everyone’s left,

So I stare out at the stars

Shining from buildings instead of the sky,

Rest my forearms on the window

And sigh-

No one is here,

No one will catch me being the version of me

That doesn’t have a mirror to decide who to be,

My reflection in the window finds itself soulless,

In my eyes I find nothing

As to who I am,

Perhaps that is why I spend so long

Looking into everyone else’s,

To find my humanity,

No one is looking

But I suppose I wish someone would

Catch me as I truly am,

Tell me you love me too.

[alltimefail-sims]

I'm sure this has been done, but I wanted to showcase some of my favorite fem-frame looks from the new Horse Ranch EP.

More of my thoughts and some mediocre screenshots under the cut ↓

"There will be no horse content from me" she says only a few hours ago... like a lying liar. But I'm way out of my depth with this pack friends... I have no idea what I'm doing. I know nothing about horses or ranches lmfao, but I ended up testing the new pack out because I can't go into the Jacobs save until some mods are updated. Thus, Lea Hahn was born!

I was pleasantly surprised with the CAS items for this pack! Granted, three of the hairs I showcased above are BG, but I still kind of count them with the pack because they came with the prep-update. I love the dirtier clothes and wish more clothes from other packs came with dirty swatches.

Here's a picture of Lea and her horse, Bullet Train; an elder rescue who is supposed to be really defiant, but her and Lea actually clicked right away. 🥺❤️ Lea is already on level 3 horseback riding. I felt like the skill was gained surprisingly fast, but I guess I shouldn't complain haha.

Also, I can't tell if her jeans are glitching with the saddle's texture (the feet place - stirrups I think they're called?). But it looks like there is a texture issue there where the stirrups (?) are the same blue as the jeans... and if that is an issue, it should not be lmao. Especially not with clothes that literally came with the pack lmao... but I digress!

Need a good default eye for these horses. I think they're pretty cute but their eyes are soulless lmfao.

The build and buy stuff in this pack is probably my favorite that has come out in a while. TS4 is good at looking good, and the decor does not disappoint. I love the "shabby" look, I love all the wood tones and the textures. HOWEVER - I am upset there are references to basket weaving, but basket weaving is not a skill. Pottery would have been a great skill for this EP too. I just want more things to do with my sim. For $40.00, I think they should have threw in at least one more skill-building activity, but that's just my opinion.

As for the world/townies, I really like this one. I wasn't crazy about San Sequoia, but I'm loving this world. (Go figure, I'm a Strangerville girly so we already knew that would be the case.) Lea met her neighbors, Don Gooseman and the "Mysterious Rancher" who were really helpful and kind, despite her being incredibly awkward because she's a loner.

Final bright side: I'm shocked that I haven't encountered any major bugs like... at all. Usually new EPs are riddled with issues, but so far things seem to be pretty smooth. That is a welcome change, but the bar is in hell when we're excited about an EP being functional upon release lol...

I haven't tried nectar making, but I'm going to try that tomorrow so uhhhh... more thoughts to come I guess. If you read all of this... ily❤️.

Okay bye!

[spuddlespud]

The Wolf and the Pearl

I've been sitting on this for ages so I'm finally posting. Author notes at the end.

The Pearl smiled down at him with a bloodcurdlingly serene expression. "Tell me traveller, what is your wish?"

Silence answered. All remained still within the cave, save the Pearl itself and the waves of the pool.

The Pearl twisted on it's golden plinth. It was perfectly spherical, a couple of inches in diameter and a creamy colour that was somehow both dull and shiny at the same time. Its light brought an eerie sheen upon the turqoise water of the pool and completely eclipsed the moon's gentle rays.

Through the light Wolf could see the Pearl's weirdly human face, complete with teeth and eyebrows. Nothing about this age-old being was as it seemed. He knew that now. The trickery behind its eyes was so much easier to see on this side of his wish.

The dancing waves of the pool was the only other thing to move, and even that sent a chill through Wolf, stealing some of the fire from his anger. There was no hint of any living creature under the surface, only the pull of the current itself.

Everything in him screamed that he didn't belong here. He couldn't even see the moon's lonely craters through the pearls taunting light. The pale rock of the cave captured the light from the pearl, swirling it around in unpredictable patterns. Nothing else moved, not even a breath of wind.

Wolf found it hard to reply over the blood pounding in his head, but the Pearl took joy from his silence, repeating again just as serenely but with a slightly smug tilt to its mouth. "Traveller, I ask again. What is your wish?"

The words from its cold lips echoed across the water of the pool, malicious and misleading.

"My wish? My wish?!?" the words choked in Wolf's throat. There was nothing he hated more in this grim, soulless kingdom than that pearl. There he sat, a man with nothing left to give. No. Not a man. So much less than a man. A monster with nothing left to give. His pain had cooled the passionate energy that normally animated his every move. "My wish? My wish?!? I wished for love. You promised to bring me love."

"I did bring you love."

"You brought me devastation." Wolf replied in a deathly still voice. His sharp golden eyes didn't miss the smug little smirk on the pearl's face.

Wolf ached. "I should throw you to the bottom of the sea." His quiet threat was punctuated by a growl, the promise of a predator.

"You should be grateful for what I gave you." The pearl spoke with a chilling calmness.

"Grateful?!?"

"You really think even a blessed being such as myself could possibly have the power to find a desperate enough creature to fall in love with you? Look at you..."

Involuntarily, he glanced down at the faded red velvet of his suit and the scuffed shoes that had been pinching his almost human feet all day.

"You're hardly a treat to the eyes. Even if by some miraculous happenstance a human fell in love with you, how do you think that would end? You're a monster. A dangerous dirty little predator, there's nothing but murder written upon your soul."

His claws extended, digging painful welts into his palms. The pearl let its comments build in the silence for a while as Wolf found no way to reply.

"But..." The smug voice returned, niggling into his brain. "... I am an omnipotent being."

"Omnipotent's stretching it you gritty clam."

"Tsk tsk with charm like that it's a deep surprise she never fell in love with you. Will never fall in love with you."

Another cold pause. The pearl's tiny eyes bored into his, almost like it could see the shadow of his heart twisting and bursting in his chest. "..at least not without help. But as I was saying, I am an omnipotent delight, and benevolent to boot. Your wish, as they say, is my command. I'm sure if you just wished specifically that she would...

Wolf took a threatening step closer, ignoring the splash of his feet in the water. "What? Fall in love with me?!?

"Well what else are you going to do? If you refuse to take my offer, you may as well follow through on your parents wishes and just drown yourself."

Pointedly ignorning the memories that suggestion dragged up, he let a sly wolfy smile creep across his face. "Fine, you've convinced me, I will make a wish today. Right now, in fact. A wish that will change my world forever. You know every wish a soul makes right?"

"That is correct. I know all wishes," the Pearl responded, still full of charm and confidence.

It was Wolf's turn to make eye contact as he drew himself up to his full monstorus height, grinning wildly. "So, great deity of the sea. What is my wish going to be?"

Every inch of the angriest parts of his being were focused on this one wish. The anger and the pain and the joy of righteousness all built into one purpose. Satisfaction flowed into him from the look of building panic on the Pearl's face.

"Go on, tell me. What, oh great pearl of the deep, is my wish?" Wolf asked.

The Pearl was quick to reply. "No! Think about what you're doing. I can bring you great joy, and happiness. Everything your soul desires."

"You mean my dirty, dangerous, murderous soul right?

"That was simply...hyperbole. You have a certain fire, yes, but really..."

"Oh, shut the fuck up." He replied, swirling the "fuck" around his fangs and accompanying it with a growl. "I'll admit it, you're every bit as insightful as you seem. A true god. You know my deepest, darkest wishes, probably better than any other creature I've ever met. I am everything you say. I am an unloveable murderor. And you know what it is an unloveable murderer wishes for."

"No!"

"Despite how fully you know the worst in me, you weren't preperaed for the wish I was going to make. I wish..."

"No, no please. She can love you. She'll be yours, for a whole eternity."

"Mine? She can be mine? You stupid little clam. You could chain her to me for a thousand years and she would never be 'mine'. We don't own one another as you do. You've played with our lives for long enough. I wish..."

"STOP" the Pearl screeched.

"I wish that this pearl will crumble immediately into dust, loosing all its powers and ceasing to exist."

As he spoke, so it must be. A look of pure fear passed across the Pearl's face, the only genuine emotion Wolf thought it had ever felt. The miserable thing opened its mouth to speak who will ever know what words, only to crumble in on itself with a pathetic sigh. Just like that, it's golden light spluttered out and the features of the cave dimmed into obscurity.

It was done. Wolf's chest tightened cruelly around his lungs as he sank to his knees in the tepid pool. Nothing left to fight for, nothing left to love. Just nothing. His anger cracked, a hard, cold grief leaking through.

An earsplitting howl rocked through the cave, a fitting mirror of his inner sorrow. As much of a bastard as it had been, the Pearl had been right in every single thing it said about him. He was unloveable, a monster. A killer. She would be better off never seeing him again. She had said as much the last time he had seen her. Probably the last time he would ever see her. He always was and always would be alone. Hated. Hideous. Shunned.

The thoughts swirled round his head in a circular flagellation, each one bringing on new sobbing and howls. No creature heard him, nobody reached out to comfort him. His tears slipped unnoticed into the pool. He even took pain to hide his wretched face from the sight of his beloved moon. Wolf's neat claws grew tattered and bloody where he scratched them against the rocky floor of the pool. He took perverse comfort in the sting of the cursed water against his despised skin, wishing the tide would carry him far away.

That's where he stayed until daybreak roused him and he limped off to lick his wounds. Little did Wolf know that he had set off a historic chain of events. The universe would be fighting for many years to find its balance again.

A/N: There's a bit of a story to this one. Over 20 years ago I watched campy fantasy tv series at someone’s house (we were defo a lot younger than the age rating on it). I was obessed about it and have a really vivid memory of a werewolf guy who was in a gold and white glowing room absolutely wracked with angst about a sacrifice he was making for a woman and like talking to a magic pearl about a wish. This one scene dug its way so far into my consciousness that I had dreams about it. It was so dramatic and angsty and werewolfy. I tried to search everywhere for it but couldn't remember the name. Fast forward 20 years and by fluke (I found a v old fb post) I discovered that it was called 10th Kingdom, an amazingly campy (if outdated) show. Except that this scene was nowhere near what I remember. Its not some righteously angsty scene of star crossed love. He bought her an expensive (shit CGI) singing pearl ring with money they needed for her to return home (and leave him) and she rightly called him out on it so he threw it in a lake. So yeah, this is my attempt to get the story that was in my head on paper as it made such an impact on me.

So points we can take away:

Yes I have always been obsessed with werewolves

I've actually been dreaming up fanfiction for much longer that I expected

This is what I produce when I'm self indulgent and let the demons take over (i had to take out three 'howl burst from his lips' phrases - where else would it be coming from, his arse cheeks?)

I don't normally write so much scene description so that's a bit different. Most of this was written on my phone on the bus, and the rest of it to a yearny LOTR soundtrack. And if you're still listening to me jabber on then I'm blowing you a little kiss

[aiscapades]

touchstarved m5 as npmd songs

i already did arcana x npmd so might as well do touchstarved

leander — dirty girl, hatchet town

vere — nerdy prudes must die, the summoning

ais — literal monster, the best of you

mhin — bury the bully, if i loved you

kuras — cool as i think i am (reprise), dirty dudes must die

defending myself brief explanations:

leander

dirty girl: he is a toxic alpha male "daddy" who would say the cringiest shit if it worked to manipulate mc. being attracted to someone you know is Not Good For You. the grace (mc)/max (leander) dynamic "you got me hypnotized / i'll never ever tell you to behave / i am expecting you to betray me" + "i am expecting you to behave / you want a tour of the house you better straighten out your crooked ways" just fits imo. he's so slutty. hatchet town: this song encompasses the anyone-could-be-a-monster mass hysteria that fills me when i look into leander's eyes.

vere

nerdy prudes must die: almost self-explanatory. he is in every shadow, hunting you. you cannot rid of him. he wants you dead? you're dead. the lyrics give cat-playing-with-their-prey vibes and that fits vere best imo. the taunting, the insults, the pettiness. sucks to be a nerd i guess. the summoning: i was conflicted abt this one. first i assigned it to kuras for the biblically-accurate angel vibes; then i wondered if it fit ais & ocudeus. i settled on vere because... he speaks in riddles similarly to the lords in black + vere is def the type to ask for what you cherish most in return for helping you + "take all our kingdoms back" because vere was once revered as a god but has now been reduced to the senobium's pet. also nibbly wanting to eat souls is vere-coded. && wiggly claiming to be their friend but obviously having nefarious motives. "our true form would melt your minds" can apply to kuras but i think vere would be pretty frightening as well. "you gamble it on the roll of the dice" befriending vere is a gamble; is he going to toy with you, kill you? or love you?

ais

literal monster: of all the m5 monsters, i think this fits ais best. "his fists are always half-cocked" ais is prone to violence. he's always up for a fight. worrying about associating with him because you are at risk of falling victim to ocudeus. "no one's gonna stop him" nobody seems to care he leaves people for dead?? people are too scared to interfere?? the best of you: this is a vague happy-lovey-dovey song that could apply to them all, BUT it reminds me of how ais seems especially attached to mc from the beginning and doesn't want them to lose themself to the seaspring. "i need the kind of love from someone else" + "it's like you test me but not to best me" their witty banter/teasing dynamic.

mhin

bury the bully: cutting up the body of some mf who bothered them is so mhin haha. not in a crazed killer way; the song is very matter-of-fact and it fits their medical vibe. they stuck their dagger in the neck of a soulless like it was nothing. "we're gonna hack all his limbs off / how else he gonna fit?" if i loved you: this is classic tsundere mhin vibes. arguing that they don't love you as they sing a love ballad—like c'mon!!

kuras

cool as i think i am (reprise): this is the part where pete is telling steph it's okay to sacrifice him if it ensures her safety. that is very kuras-coded to me. "let me take the bullet / is it really a crime if you get to live your life to the fullest?" he has lived for thousands of years; he would rather you have a fulfilling life than continue with his own miserable one. "if i loved you more than the stars above / i'd have to let you go" dirty dudes must die: the themes of repentance and sinning fit kuras; he's still a monster who has probably committed horrible atrocities (what is he repenting for?) even if he presents as a noble angel doctor. this song kinda gives the vibe of his bad ending maybe? giving in to your own sins to make those around you repent for theirs? "who will pray for you when your body is gone / this is the consequence for what you've done"

[kiwicopia]

Hello may I request a match up for Jujutsu Kaisen and Genshin Impact please? :) I’m a straight female and my pronouns are she/her.

I’m very shy, distant, quiet, and a little awkward. Basically a huge introvert at first. However, once I get to know you better or I at least see that you’re comfortable around me, I’ll get comfortable as well :) And once that happens, you could say I become slightly more extroverted. I get louder, laugh more, and am overall less shy, distant, quiet, and awkward. I’m also very sensitive and have tons of trouble speaking up for myself. When getting yelled at or just insulted, I try and act unbothered but I think everyone knows that I’m holding in my tears at that point… (it’s really embarrassing ok don’t judge 🫠) But one thing I can say is that I’m somewhat funny. When I feel comfortable around people or just someone, I usually let more witty and funny comments out. The same goes for when I’m like shy Y’know? Its just that it’s much more less cause the last thing I want is awkward silence. Hobbies I have are photography, gaming, golfing, bowling, board games, jigsaw puzzles, and listening to music! My appearance usually consists of grey sweatpants, grey sweatshirt, and black boots— it’s usually my go to outfit since it’s pretty comfortable. At home, my hair is tied in a low ponytail. Outside however, my hair is let down. I let my hair down outside because I’m hella insecure about my side profile. I have a round face, curtain bangs, eye-bags, black hair, and really dark brown eyes :) some people say they look soulless but idk 🤷‍♀️ I think the only thing that’s preventing my eyes look completely soulless is the fact that I commonly express myself through reactions. I also tend to speak using a lot of “uh” or “um” because if usually when I don’t say those two words, I end up mixing up my words and my whole sentence just ends up sounding confusing 😬 As for what I’d like to do during Valentine’s Day, I think I’d prefer just staying indoors and having a comfy and stress-free day. Like a day where we don’t worry about anything and we just stay at home and vibe 😋

Your personalities may differ, but that's honestly what drew Satoru towards you in the first place. Yes, yes, there was a bit of teasing here and there, but all of his words were genuine, in terms of his feelings for you. He's a mean what he says kind of guy, so when he says that he has feelings for you, he means it. Satoru doesn't mind how sensitive you are, but he absolutely hates it if anyone badgers you to the point of making you cry. He won't stand for that at all. He's a gentle man, caring and sometimes a little clingy. He'll spend Valentine's Day with you indoors, where no one can bother either of you. It also gives him a chance to love and kiss you in ways he's been craving to. Peppering his lips here and there, whispering words of praise and worship, listing all the reasons as to why he loves you. It's such a perfect moment and day.

Ayato finds your personality to be quite adorable. Such a cute and shy little thing you are, and whom he has taken quite the liking to. Being one of Ayaka's friends, it was only a matter of time before you grew to be his, and then so much more. He doesn't mind your sensitive side and finds it quite endearing, yet he won't hesitate to tell off anyone who dares to yell at you or make you cry. As busy of a man that he is, Ayato still makes time to spend with you, and today is no exception. He had planned it for months. The staff had been ushered away, leaving the two of you alone to rest in his chambers. You're both nothing but a comfortable pile of legs and arms wrapped securely around one another, enjoying the other's presence. At least until Ayato initiates a little more. Just some sweet kisses along your neck as he tells you just how much he loves you, in the words of poems. You're his little cherry blossom, and he will do anything and everything to keep you happy.

[vermanaward]

anyway keynote stuff

nutkin doing a public service by cockblocking thancred

painter krile is cute as hell im so happy for her. green mage truthers in a shambles

picto's af is relm's gear from ff6. which, you know, fits lmao

i love the stylised skill effects, something actually unique looking in the game

i don't have any expectations whatsoever for how it'll play but as long as it's better than smn idc

another buffing class (: ofc, the two minute meta lives

no rez, so it'll cream rdm dps wise, F

we're condensing fantasy n and s america into six zones, huh

the cyberpunk city is. setting whiplash, huh

area name is 'solution nine' I Don't Like This

oh and it's the endgame hub. at least it's pretty ig

one of the healers in my static is being a complete pissbaby about the Weird Shit i might tell him to fuck off to lotro if he continues

oh shit is the Brand in the dungeon vid. gw2 collab confirmed /shot

the stacked cactuar lmao

no wings on the smn af. heresy

rpr going for the dommy mommy look i see

firmament... 2! lunar boogaloo

wait. what multiple planets. as side content. oh this is going to be intensely shallow it's it

oh wait are just. it's just elysium 2.0 by way of the diadem. okay. as long as it lets me fish and doesn't make me want to die (hello diadem this means u)

cyberpunk savage raid lets go. explains why the cyberpunk city is the endgame hub. maybe

supposedly mr ozma soft confirmed 2 ultimates but we'll see

surprised they confirmed eden ult before stb story but i can't say im sad

7.1 eden ult pog

'new plans for deep dungeons' that will be fucking dead after six weeks because we need people to do roulettes instead

no pvp updates until 7.1 LMAO

ayyyyy new field operation (now just tie it to the relic so it doesn't die immediately like v&c dungeons did because you had the unhinged idea for it just to be a tome sink)

BST limited job finally fucking confirmed

im not one of the people pining after it personally but limited job enjoyers will be happy

oh no it has a collection feature i am going to have to 100% it i say while still missing like half the blu spells

the textures on that arr gear in the update preview is hilariously pixelated lmao

(i do like the new skin shaders tho)

the metal shader looks v nice too but on that low rez top just. highlights how bad it is

the highlander f lost half her eyebrows wtf

they gave the femroe a nose job I Don't Like This!

for the most part the face looks a lot better but. Weird Noses Good

lizards look nice at least

'we know some people like that dead eyed soulless look so we enabled you to have that too' l m a o

'please look forward to adjusting your character to your preference' so free fanta when

oh shit lmao

i like that they are showing dark skin exampls as well. the catgirl had me going [hmm] bc the skin tone became noticeably cooler but the rest of them (even the non fantasy skin colours) look decent to my eye

femhroth looking better than i was afraid of, still decidedly more cowardly than male hroth designs but such is fantasy games

inb4 no hats

i like the key art