#I am not a medical professional this is based on our own experiences and researches

[withered--s0uls]

Hi system with bpd here. Posting this so fairy anon might see this and maybe be able to help the alter and system :)

DISCLAIMER: We are no medical professional, all I'm about to say comes from our own experiences as an Introject heavy system, our experiences with pseudos and information we have gained from other systems who are trying to heal. Please seek a professional in the field of DID & OSDD1 a/b for a more professional take on how to deal with the dissociation from reality through pseudo memories. Thank you.

First off, I hope it'll comfort you that alters cannot die unless the body dies. We can only disappear either by fusing with another alter through integration (a sign of healing!) or dormancy (can be either healing or the opposite, just means you aren't needed in the system atm/anymore or can't handle it's current situation so you basically "hibernate" in a way?)

Second off, this is why source seperation is very important. It's a requirement for Introjects to be able to heal.

Note: Sorce Separation does NOT mean to strip yourself of any and all things from your source. It means to be able to tell apart your source and pseudos from reality and acknowledge you're your own person and not your source. You're not a fictional character (if fictive) or someone else (if factive) or anything inbetween (if mixed/partial Introject).

You are a real person. Part of a real whole. Whatever happened in your source wasn't real and didn't actually happen to you. It can still be upsetting, but you need to be able to tell apart reality and pseudos bc if you don't, that may cause genuinely delusional beliefs and views on yourself and reality.

Example:

One of our fictives is an IDV fictive whose source relates to white sand street asylum. I wont say what their source character is for their comfort. Anyways.

They are triggered by mental hospital topics, especially bad experiences in them. Because the body went through something similar. Nowhere NEAR as bad as in their source ofc bc modern time, but still.

Pseudo memories aren't real, but they are usually metaphors for something the body went through. You have pseudos of being locked up but your body never was? It can be a metaphor for feeling trapped during the trauma.

You'll need to be able to tell apart your pseudos from your knowledge and hcs of source, and then also tell apart your pseudos from reality.

Source seperation can take time and be uncomfortable for alters who are still actively using their source as a way of comfort. Furthermore, if you're still actively going through trauma irl then it's an escape mechanism.

Pseudos are fake memories usually made bc the real memory is too painful or because the system needed escapism. However, that's that, they're fake. They're a form of dissociation in fact.

You're based on your source, but you're a separate person.

Yes, you can point at your source and go "look that's me!!" Just know that you aren't 100% that character, you didn't go through the happenings of your source.

Even if your partner isn't ready to fully source separate, please I beg do not treat them as the character. Treat them as their own person. Don't encourage the dissociation (coming from someone who had their dissociation through pseudos encouraged by other systems and singlets before) but provide comfort to them. Remind them they're more than their source & redirect them if something like being this upset over pseudos happens again.

Harming another alter in any way (typically emotionally bc like we literally share a body) is a form of self harm. What your gf did was self harm within the system. Try to support her through whatever she's going through and if their system is safe to and ready to, support them trying to find an Identity outside their source.

You're no therapist, you cant provide the required professional help, but you can be there as a support.

THIS WAS ALL; /GEN /LH AND /INFO!!

These are things our system had to learn and understand the hard way, so I do feel like I need to help here.

I'm a Varian tangled fictive myself. I'm pretty source separated but still identify with my sources appearance and some other traits. That's completely fine! Because I *am* Varian, however, I am not *the* Varian, I'm simply *based on* him.I'm not a fictional character behind a TV screen. I'm a person. That's the important thing you need to realize to heal :)

-🧪

Link to a twitter thread of us talking about our experiences and way of coping with bpd splits!

bpd culture is well fuck my gf and fp (an alter in a system) just found the dickhead who created their lore (which was a whole bunch of severely traumatic stuff) and then attempted to kill them in the headspace and was thus stuck in headspace jail for a bit. like on one side uh. yes, justified, half her backstory isnt just horrible but even as fiction was extremely triggering, but on the OTHER side if my main oc appeared.... would be hell for me, and like i wouldnt expect it, so their writer prolly didnt expect it either...

but if i have to pick sides im always on my darlings side. i dont care if shes wrong.

-fairy anon

.

[therealvinelle]

what are the cullen’s hobbies? (not canon ones, things and activities you think they’d enjoy - even if being a vampire made it a little difficult or damn near impossible)

God, my eye is twitching with the desire to give them the weirdest hobbies imaginable.

The Cullens have an insane amount of money and time, and their powers (ultra-fine muscle control, amazing vision, etc.) means they will excel at a lot of hobbies.

The hobbies they are prevented from by their vampirism are things involving animals, professional sports (as you'll have to submit to drug tests and your health and fitness routine being monitored), close contact with people in general, food-based hobbies, and hobbies were humans are likely to bleed one way or another.

To say nothing of how niche a hobby community can get. Everyone knows everything about everyone, and that opens up for a level of scrutiny a vampire might not be prepared for.

So, let's assume these barriers aren't an issue for whatever reason. What do the Cullens do?

(I... admit I wasn't entirely able to resist that weird hobby urge.)

Alice might just find herself doing cat or dog shows. The level of perfectionism and effort that goes into preparing your pet (depending strongly on breed and fur quality, of course, some breeds require little if any preparation. The universal experience, though, is GROOOOOOOOOMMMM and if it’s dogs, then TRAIIIIINNNNN your dog) could very well appeal to her, and I imagine she'd develop her own coat products. Silicone powder, color-enhancing shampoo, volumizing spray, she's got her own line, to say nothing of the edge her gift would give her, as she would know which puppy or kitten to buy. (The "which cub am I choosing?!!" issue being a common one because when a puppy is 8 weeks old you simply do not know if it will grow up to be a hottie or not, and it’s not much easier with 12 week old kittens. This is a science.) Her pets win everything.

Carlisle, well, the trouble with this guy is his work is his hobby. And it's already one vampires are supposed to be unable to do. The man is a fluke. Carlisle's hobby is now to be able to contribute to medical research and reference patients from the 1820's without anybody asking questions.

Edward... god, all I can picture is some intensely esoteric craft, one that five people in the world can do and that creates something beautiful and meaningful. Making instruments, the rarer and more elaborate the better, is the name of the game, I think.

Emmett would love to compete. He's a vampire, he's going to win at everything anyway, he's incredible. He kicks the butts of seventeen-year-old humans who worked hard and makes them all cry because he just took their scholarships. He whoops, beats his chest. VICTORY!!

Esme, cooking competitions. She's winning them all. And, because anon said to remove the vampirism problems, she's not eating her competitors.

Jasper is into theatre. Not because he's particularly interested in it, oh no, he just likes to abuse his gift this way. With his gift he can make the other actors bomb their scenes, or make an untalented schmuck seem like the next Rex Harrison. He's in a movie club for the same reason. He made one guy laugh during Schindler's List. Just the one.

Renesmée, if finding the limitations of her hybridness lifted, becomes a freestyle diver. Who needs to breathe? Usually Renesmée, but not anymore!

Rosalie has her cars already, but she strikes me as a horse girl. Give the girl an unafraid horse, and the ability to compete without that being an issue, and our girl is on a Dutch Warmblood competing on a national level in dressage.

[leitereads]

OC/WIP Tag Game!

Thank you so much to the lovelies @paeliae-occasionally, @drchenquill and @the-letterbox-archives (who actually created the tag game - it is such a fantastic idea) for tagging me!

Rules/Premise: Just open the floor for questions about your wips/ocs/creative process/etc.!

As I am writing this, I am embarking in a new creative journey, both by developing my own Vampire: the Masquerade (VtM) chronicle (a tabletop roleplaying game in which you participate in it as a vampire character) and by revamping my old WIPs into something I am truly passionate about. Also, I am developing a solo character for another similar tabletop roleplaying game (Vampire: the Requiem - Eugen Schulze), and it has taken a lot of my energy (in a good way) as of lately.

Therefore, the novel-focused WIPs are still being revamped/researched about, but I have no problem talking about what I have so far.

Seriously, ALL QUESTIONS ARE ALLOWED, from everyone. I'll answer anything and anyone hahah.

I sure will ask you all questions, since I am extremely interested in knowing more about your own WIPs/OCs as well, but for now I will be tagging @yourpenpaldee, @writelikethrollope and @noxxytocin! Thank you so much, and no pressure!

The Apocryphal Truth

I started writing this novel while I was still in high school, and the main character (Dr Edgar Frost) is someone who has been growing up with me. The premise of the WIP is based on Gnostic horror, and I play around with themes connected to memory, reality, consciousness, trauma and loss. It's set in the Victorian Era, and the characters are diverse, in almost everything. Some of the characters are the following ones:

Edgar Frost: an illegitimate son of a British earl, who is searching for a way of joining fragmented "minds", in order to reveal a higher truth. He is your brooding Sturm und Drang Byronic hero/anti-hero, with an angelic exterior, but ready to get his hands dirty if needed.

Cléo: A French-Egyptian orphan who ended up in custody of Edgar's father, suffering the same destiny as Edgar. She is a determined young woman, passionate about the arts, but also politics, and she was able to climb her way to the top through her cunning and leadership personality.

Jacques: French journalist who belonged to the French military and secret services of the time. He had his fair share of violence, and his hedonistic side took him to London, to spend the rest of his life away from the drama. Until he met Edgar, and now he stuck himself to that idiot.

The Immortal Emperor's Regicide

I don't have a lot of material regarding this WIP, because:

a) it is based on a tabletop narrative game as well, so part of the worldbuilding comes from there and,

b) this was originally a collective creative writing project, and I am no longer working with my writing partner, so all the characters they created don't exist anymore in this new version of the story, making it a complete new story.

But the overall premise is similar to the one of The Apocryphal Truth: Victorian-like setting, horror-fantasy oriented. Ghosts, lots of ghosts. Emotional (and blood) vampires. Eldritch Gods, etc.

Solo Character: Eugen Schulze

Dr Eugen Schulze is a vampire character made for a Vampire: the Requiem (VtR) chronicle narrated by a friend of mine. It is set in our current days, in Berlin. Eugen himself is an old vampire (from the 1910s) who was transformed at the end of WW2. He worked as a doctor and scientist, responsible for horrendous experiments associated with Germany's position on the war. Things didn't go as planned, and he stayed in torpor till the 90s/early 2000s, and during this time his ideologies changed (he now hates everyone). With a witty and sarcastic sense of humour, Eugen is someone extremely professional, and he is trying to reach apotheosis through his vampiric condition, by medical experimentation and by following Gnostic beliefs. He is also a great appreciator of goth and metal music.

[maaikeatthefullmoon]

Ok, I've written enough and couldn't hold in the need to publish the first - very short - chapter of the new project I'm working on.

The Deepest Blues Are Black - A Good Omens human AU story

I never thought I'd write a non-canon piece. But this idea wormed its way into my head and took up residence, and, well, there you go. It's near and dear to my heart. It's a mix of lived experience and fact checking/research with several mental health professionals I know. The location is based on a hospital I was a patient (erm, 'service user') at.

Anyway, the general plan is to update every WEDNESDAY and SATURDAY whenever possible. Some chapters will be short, some longer.

It begins in an acute mental health ward (actually, no, it begins 28 years earlier, but after that), but it will evolve.

There will be many content warnings. They will be stated at the beginning of each chapter. I will update tags as the story evolves.

In general, the content warnings will include many flavours of mental illness warnings, and I would urge that even if you *like* being triggered by these things, not to read this. This involves two characters during a prolonged stay in an acute mental health unit.

With regards to diagnoses and medication: I will *not* be discussing them. These are fictional characters, and I am not a medical professional. You are welcome to have your own thoughts, of course, but I will not comment on them. Whenever medication needs to be discussed in the story, I will keep it deliberately vague and I won't hesitate to muddy the story to be vague enough.

Anyway, if I haven't put you off (I've not really sold it, have I?! I'm genuinely very excited about it!!), this is it! Only one short chapter up, but I hope you'll subscribe and take this ride with me. There will be angst and pining and there's one song per chapter. I am back on my shtick. But I promise an eventual happy ending.

[weirdstrangeandawful]

TW: discussion of disability in whump, use of identity-first language (not being discussed or anything but better to be safe)

I’ve seen a decent amount of discussion around disability in whump and I wanted to add my piece because I actually feel differently than a lot of people apparently. I have multiple diagnosed and also as-yet-unidentified disabilities so this is only based on my own experiences.

Fair warning: this will be a fairly long post

First of all, it’s important to note that anything that affects someone’s ability to function to a significant degree — whether it’s diagnosed, undiagnosed, or undiagnosable — is a disability. If you feel differently, I suggest you take a hard look at why you are gatekeeping/encouraging ableism (no shame, we all have our pasts but we have to move forward in a better direction). Whump as a genre by definition involves affecting a character’s ability to function by means of causing them physical or psychological pain so it’s pretty much impossible to avoid disability in this genre.

And not only can it not be avoided but characters, like real people, should be allowed to grieve their loss. Grief is inevitable and nothing to be ashamed of. Treating it as something shameful and as a choice belittles the pain that disabled people actually feel and the severity of the condition. I’ve seen a lot of people say that they don’t like seeing characters acting like their condition is the worst thing that’s ever happened to them and that’s a valid standpoint and I understand if someone doesn’t want to read that but I don’t think it shouldn’t be written about at all. I’ll use myself as an example:

I was born unable to process auditory stimulus properly (i.e. I can’t hear well) and yeah, it’s not awful for me because I’ve lived this way all my life and of course it’s stressful but I am still able to be proud of my identity. But if someone (fictional or otherwise) loses their hearing in an accident, yeah it might in fact be that worst thing that ever happened to them and that is equally valid and they are just as much of a disabled person as I am!

In essence: a single character’s disability should have no more bearing on the disabled community than any one real member of the disabled community has and it is perfectly valid for them to react differently to a disability than many real people would.

As a footnote I will throw in one exception: non-disabled people or people with a different disability should be careful not to spread misinformation. Doing your research is great but we need to remember that often (and I daresay usually) doctors and medical researchers are way too prone to generalisations to give any helpful information especially on the internet (—sincerely someone who has seen 14+ different health professionals and remains largely undiagnosed)

[mineofilms]

Yoga Over Weight Training

Read, then watch the videos for better contextual value.

I sent a variation of this to a friend of mine and posted on my social media feeds. This person was seeking help with lower back issues and numb legs. They asked my advice as a personal trainer and someone who rather looks very deeply into these things from both a philosophical and fitness point of view.

DDP on Joe Rogan talking about Arthur:

Never, Ever Give Up. Arthur's Inspirational Transformation!

Before I go on; one absolutely should seek medical guidance at some point and a chiropractor may or may not be the best form of medical help. It might, depending on the severity of your issue. I am no medical professional. I can only comment based on my own experiences, fitness knowledge and ability to research at a high level. If you want to really find out what is happening to you the only way a medical professional can find out is an MRI on that area. I am no expert by any means. Just that I have had problems. I thoroughly researched my issues and also sought out medical advice.

This is why I would give yoga a go over weight training. Yoga does a few things. It’s not just stretching, but it helps align your core and work your core without having to do actual conventional working out. You do not see bodybuilders or powerlifters do yoga often. Some, sure, but I am saying it isn’t something you see everywhere. They do not do it because they literally cannot do it. They are too over developed to be flexible like that and it physically hurts them so they stop or quit doing it. The truth is they literally are not in shape even though their outside look says otherwise. Some of the strongest people around are people that work construction or outside work. What happens is they tend to work harder and not smarter. Think more about working smarter and not harder here. Yoga is one, if not the hardest workout techniques to master. People will fall many times, but the ones that really want to feel better and/or look better get back up. It's all about getting back up. It is a challenge and test of heart and character. No one is watching, really. Just you. It's the attitude to do something even though it's difficult and one is in pain is so damn important. It is so important people have to force themselves to do something.  Arthur’s story above is one of the best examples of that you're ever going to see. His video has 108 million views in 11 years. Disabled Veteran that was injured due to too many jumps out of the plane and landing feet first over and over again. It damaged his back so severely he couldn’t walk on his own anymore. The military fully disabled him and he accepted that was his new and normal life moving forward. Over the course of a few years Arthur gained a shit tone of weight and his body was literally dying the slow death when the body is no longer physically active in a healthy manner (work smarter not harder mentality).

I mean who has better excuses to give up than this guy or others like him? Most don’t even try. They use the excuse ‘they can’t’ due to whatever medical reason, mine own medical issues and excuses included. They cannot see how they can go from nothing to something in a relatively short time of 6-12 months. High School mentality of 4 years was a big deal, but are those 4 years that huge a deal in the larger scheme of your life? I did the math. 4 out of 45 years is about 8.89%. So 9% of our lives that we have lived was dedicated to that High school life. The point of this is 6-12 months to correct 30+plus years of poor behaviors, (behaviors that may have contributed to one’s unique physical/mental or both circumstances), is a fair trade off.

• Arthur began the work. • He failed at first. • He fell... • Many times he fell. • He documented it. • He started to gain balance. • His core became stronger. • In 6 months he lost 100 pounds, a side effect of doing yoga, and was able to walk with a cane. • In 10 months, he lost 140 pounds, walked with no cane and sprinted 50 yards.

• Sprinted, not walked with a cane, or not with a cane, but a dead-wind sprint.

• The man literally looked like he was 15 years younger.

• He defied all the doctors that said he would never walk again without help. • He did that and more. • All because he didn’t quit.

He understood that to be great at something, whatever it might be, that he would fail, epically. Epically fail and fall before he could become even a little bit good at this, then later, great at this and he endured. That is what it takes. I do not do yoga, I need to. Me, my excuse, is time. I never have enough time and I rather still enjoy weight training full-time, but I understand that I will need to change that in the near future. My body is too beat up to be grinding that way forever. The thing about yoga is you can do it anywhere at any time. No gym membership required. You can go on YouTube and find all sorts of free yoga instructions or pay for one or some. The DDP Yoga, Diamond Dallas Page, the Pro Wrestler from the 1990s started doing this to correct his back and shoulder injuries from being a pro wrestler for 25 years. He was so successful with it that he began hosting classes and then released his first DVD set in the mid-2000s and it blew up. DDP yoga is one of the more well-known yoga programs out there now. He has worked with and helped a lot of professional wrestlers with getting back into shape, helping with addiction issues (see how he helped Jake the Snake Roberts) and working with people who have really bad injuries they do not know how to work around.

We are talking about core/back/legs here.

That is why I say yoga over weight training but getting a band and doing stretches with a band isn’t a bad idea either. I am no yoga-guru, but I would think about doing 15-minute sessions every day, no matter what. Make it part of your daily habits. You have to make it habitual. There is no quick fix to these things. They tend to fail because the people tend to quit or modify it to such a degree no real work is being done. You have to stick with it and force this as part of your day/life and remove influences or people who do not support this for you. This comes full circle. You have to leave those, or whatever ‘it’ might be that hinders your strives to be better, behind. That is why I have to, every once and while, rant about something, because people in general, either are not paying attention, or they are so fixated on themselves, they just project themselves and their problems onto other people. Some will identify with this and leave you be while others will just enable it or you to get you out of their hair.

The past can only help you as a reminder, not a literal thing or experience one can relive. People still think that they can undo, unsee, or unsay what was once done, seen, said under the expectation of forgiveness. You do not forgive for forgiveness’s sake but one forgives because the person seeking forgiveness is working on themselves that it forces them to change. It’s a logical fallacy to believe one can change something that cannot be changed. Like the concept of time travel... One can never unsay, unsee or undo something they once said, saw or did and I have had to leave those behind that still think in those terms, that they think it is real. It’s not. As long as you are working on you, and make your physical, mental, spiritual health a priority, a process, a habitual thing that is part of you on every day and everything you do that strives towards other things. You are on the right track. No one can tell you –you are not on the right track. The ones that do are trying to sell you something or their main motivation is to make money off your ill fortunes. I have mainly good days but there are days or even weeks where I can’t do much of anything except grab my walking stick and walk around the woods, listening to science fiction books to give me that semblance of woe and awe of existence, taking in as much as I can. There will be a day I won’t be able to.

I really feel if you try the yoga thing and really put in the effort, mentally, physically, spiritually you can make strides. But starting is going to suck. It’s going to hurt. It’s going to tell you to quit. Don’t listen. Do your 15 minutes every day. Make it as much as a priority as people make their morning coffee.

“In our personal and professional lives, we are constantly hit with one adversity after the other, most of which we have no control over. But the four things we have total control over is how we react, how we adapt, how we breathe, and how we take action.” ~Diamond Dallas Page

DDP Yoga can be found at https://ddpyoga.com/

Yoga Over Weight Training by David-Angelo Mineo 2/11/2024 1,619 Words

[3liza]

speaking of balding, wondering if you have any aesthetic advice for ladies with hair loss, esp. in the typical "male" style (thinning temples and rising hairline). I'm 30, generaly negligent and apathetic doc says my bloodwork looks fine, no PCOS, low progesterone apparently. Scared to try rogaine because I already have insane facial and body hair that $1000s worth of electrolysis did not do much to eradicate.

Should I just commit to the shaved head & occasional wig for the rest of my life? Honestly considered transition lol but not feeling great about being a schlubby dude instead of a schlubby woman. What is the best aesthetic path? Primarily asking bc I deeply trust ur taste and opinions.

standard disclaimer, im not a doctor or a medical professional and all my advice is coming from a civilian without any credentials and is based solely on my own personal experience, observations and research.

since you mentioned doc said no PCOS i will assume youre AFAB, please correct me if i'm wrong since it does make a big difference with hair loss. lots of body hair + lots of face hair + male pattern baldness for cis afab women almost always means either PCOS or a similar hormonal issue. before trying anything else i would try to get a second opinion from a gyno and/or endocrinologist. because your doctor sounds like an idiot and also incurious and may also be reading your labs wrong or may have ordered not enough labs or the wrong labs. if nothing else i would try to get someone else to look at the lab results.

i dont know enough to tell you exactly which labs you need, but sometimes doctors are like fucking computers and will not actually perform the correct actions until you find the exact right way to phrase your request. in this case i would say to the doctor, firmly but politely, "my symptoms are hormonal and include male pattern baldness, hirsutism, and [anything else you think is relevant, including if you are above average height or weight, have a weird metabolism, and any menstrual pain or irregularities]. these symptoms negatively impact my quality of life and i am not willing to ignore them or just live with them. if my hormone levels are all normal, what else could be causing these problems? we need to test for those diagnoses. if you are not interested or qualified to pursue this issue for me, please refer me to a gynecologist or endocrinologist who can."

really punch that these issues are negatively impacting you and you arent able to function normally. feel free to "exagerrate" this part too, because when we live with chronic conditions we genuinely lose the ability to tell exactly HOW BAD things have gotten, because we get used to minimizing it and just going about our business, and doctors are almost never chronically ill and sincerely dont get it. they dont understand the complexity of subjective suffering.

a lot of doctors default to "the patient isnt actively bother me about this so they must not care that much" and theyre also really busy and will triage anyone who isnt actively getting their attention. don't let the appointment end without the doctor telling you exactly what the next step is and when it will occur, whether it's a lab order for tests, a day that someone will call you back or message you on MyChart, or a referral to another doctor. you are entitled to this information and care.

i think getting this medically checked out is of primary importance because it sounds systemic and not just about hair, but all the basic hair drugs are available on the grey market for not too much money. they all have various downsides but dutesteride and finasteride are both easy to get and try for yourself if you feel like it.

edit: i got so mad about doctors i didn't even answer your question. i think if it were me in your shoes (which it probably will be someday, like i said in the other post, hair loss comes for us all), if doctors and meds didnt work or didnt work well enough, i would probably shave my head and get some wigs for days when i didn't feel like being bald. there are GOOD, cheap wigs these days (haircube is one brand people really like but there are tons). and bald women look incredible

[letters-to-lgbt-kids]

My dear lgbt+ kids, 

I want to talk about trauma triggers in this letter. I’ll use a car crash as an example of a traumatizing event. 

First of all, what is a trigger exactly? The easiest definition is that it’s something that triggers a reaction in your body related to a trauma you experienced. It could trigger flashbacks (very intense memories of the event that feel like you go through it all over again) or panic attacks, 

It can also lead to physical symptoms (like shaking, nausea or feeling like you’re choking) or make you feel like you’re frozen/unable to move. 

The painful memories are usually quite easy to imagine, even for people who don’t have any personal experience with trauma reactions: If someone has been in a car crash and that experience was traumatic to them, we can imagine that seeing a car crash on tv will bring back memories from that day. 

Most people would probably understand if the person tries to avoid movies with car crash scenes in them. After all, car crashes are a dangerous and scary thing, and if you’ve been in one, then seeing one can make your body go “I remember this, we were in danger the last time we saw something like this. We are in danger again right now!”. 

But triggers are not always that obvious - and in fact, they don’t always come with clear memories at all. The heel of your shoe could get stuck in something and suddenly you “just get irrationally upset over that”: You’re shaking, your head hurts, you feel unreal and distant from everything. Everything feels kinda blurry and scary and you just want to run away...

You may not even make the concious connection between your heel getting stuck and being unable to get out of the car wreck on your own. But your body remembers “stuck” as a warning sign. 

It’s often more difficult to explain those triggers to others - “I can’t wear high heels since the accident” just sounds illogical to others. Maybe you weren’t even wearing high heels that day. But the thought of wearing them and getting stuck somewhere again fills you with a horror you can’t explain. You just know it hasn’t been that way before the crash. 

High heels aren’t a dangerous thing, there’s nothing inherently scary about them - the human body can still connect them to danger. Panic is difficult to grasp, even for our own brain. And so it tries to create connections to more tangible things, so it can protect you and avoid danger. In that sense, there’s nothing “irrational” about it at all - of course our body will try to prevent us from ever going through something so scary agan! 

I will not go into the topic of “how to deal with triggers” here - that’s something highly individual that should to be discussed with a therapist who knows you and your unique situation. I just want to let you know that having triggers is not uncommon and you’re not weird or overly sensitive. 

These internet insults like “Snowflake who gets triggered by everything” got it wrong - you’re not weak. You went through something difficult, you survived and now your body tries to protect you. 

With all my love, 

Your Tumblr Dad 

P.S: As always: I am not a medical professional. Mental health related posts like this one are just based on my own research, my own experiences and things my therapist told me. 

[swamp-spirit]

Am I Depressed or Just Lazy?

It’s the question that haunts most disabled people, whether the disability is physical or mental. Is it my fault? Am I just not trying hard enough? How do I know? 

It doesn’t help that everyone has their own opinion, opinions your accommodations and aid depend on. Do you need help, or do you just need to try harder?

Well, here’s my answer for you, an answer that has been very important for me: The question is wrong.

To get into why, let’s discuss different kinds of limits. (note, many disabled people have more than one, if not all of these. this is not an attempt to ‘rank’ disabilities, and all come with their own unique range of issues)

OBJECTIVE HARD LINE

This is something you can prove. You can go into the doctor, do a test, and have them clarify that this is a fixed, provable limit. For example, if you are paralyzed from the waist down, that’s a hard line. No amount of luck or willpower will let you walk that day. You might have a form of aphasia that makes you incapable of forming coherent sentences. If you allergic to gluten, you’re allergic to gluten.

SUBJECTIVE HARD LINE

This is a consistent, predictable limit that you know, but is not an exact, easily proven fact. For example, ‘if I hear about a car accident, I have a panic attack’. It’s more difficult to prove to external sources, but fairly easy to recognize internally.

UNPREDICTABLE HARD LINE

You know your disability has a clear, observable consequence, but you can’t say exactly how much you can handle before it hits. For example, if you walk to much, your hip freezes up, but you don’t know how much walking will cause it. You may know going to crowded events give you sensory meltdowns, but not know how much you can handle. There is no “I can go to your party for exactly eleven minutes”. 

SOFT LINE

These revolve around energy. Maybe your executive function issues make it hard for you to do homework. Maybe your chronic pain means going shopping leaves you tired. This is where spoon theory becomes popular. Everyone has physical and mental struggles and limits.

-----

The problem is, everybody has soft lines. Everybody gets tired if they push their bodies. Everybody gets stressed or sad or overwhelmed. There’s no exact measurement. 

It makes a lot of us push ourselves towards our hard lines. For example, I struggle with chronic pain and exhaustion, and, at a certain point, faint. After years of being told I was faking it, being dramatic, just needed to push through, starting to actually collapse was the first time people began to realize there was something wrong. I still don’t know how to believe my own body, I don’t know how to forgive myself for not pushing, so I push for the limits. Once I faint, then I’ve finally proved I’m trying, that I’m not just being dramatic or lazy. Mental illness is particularly hard to quantify, and many people are driven to self harm trying to create some proof that their pain is real.

Disabled or lazy? 

What do we do if the answer is lazy? We don’t want to be one of those bad disables who uses our health as an excuse and doesn’t make changes.. Maybe you can just push through it. Maybe if you just HATE yourself enough, you’ll be the person you want to be.

On the flipside, maybe it’s your disability. Not your fault. Out of your hands. No point in trying to fix it.

Obviously, neither of these are healthy places to stay, but if the two options are ‘it’s my disability and I have no control’ or ‘it’s my fault and I could fix it if I cared’, what else can you do? It also makes us lash out at hope. After all, if you can get better, isn’t it... kinda your fault that you aren’t? Aren’t you choosing to stay sick?

Because here’s the core problem: You are like this for a reason.

What is lazy? There’s this attempt to boil ourselves down to what’s ‘us’, the core traits open for moral judgement, and what’s ‘not our fault’, experiences outside us that shape our actions. It’s particularly obvious in the way we discuss criminals.

But we’re all the way we are for a reason. Every asshole has mental and social reasons to be an asshole. Nature and nurture, baby.

So what? None of it’s our fault and we should do what we want and blame other factors?

Of course not, but the reverse isn’t any better! Let’s look at a common issue:

I don’t clean as much as I want. Is it my disability, or am I lazy?

If you’re lazy, what do you actually do? Well, you stop being lazy! You buck up and Do The Dang Thing!

But if wanting to do it was enough, you wouldn’t be worrying about it in the first place. Maybe you’ll force yourself to clean for ten minutes, but the real thing you ingrain is self loathing. Stop being lazy. Stop being lazy. Stop being lazy. Hate yourself healthy.

That’s not constructive because you’re fixing the wrong problem. So what do you do? How do you give yourself agency without basing it around guilt? How do you change without shame?

. Instead of asking if your problems are ‘real’, here’s what I recommend:

1. Why am I not acting the way I want to act?

Don’t accept any answer that has moral judgement. Cut the word lazy. It’s useless. Don’t ask if it’s ‘your fault’ you have Type II diabetes, if you ‘should be able to’ pay attention in class. Cut moral judgement from the process.

Actually understanding why you act the way you do might take time, research, and thought, but changing behavior does!

Example: Why am I eating so much junk food when I know it’s making me feel worse?

Bad answer - I’m depressed

Worse answer - Because I’m a glutton with no self control

Good answer - My depression makes me seek out temporary highs from food because long term highs aren’t working, and I have self control issues that mean I often don’t act in my own best interests.

2. What are my barriers?

Once you’ve identified what’s stopping you, get into more details. If you find doing dishes overwhelming, why? What parts of the process do you find overwhelming or uncomfortable?

For the more general answers (motivation, energy, etc), what are your barriers to the solutions? What steps might help with your depression and what’s stopping you from taking those? Why don’t you do your physical therapy?

3. Is this something I can change? Is this something I can change now?

Earlier we talked about hard lines. Those come back in here. Some things, even with unlimited time and resources, remain fact. It’s not ‘giving up’ to accept a hard ‘cannot’. That said, be careful not to listen to mental illness ‘cannots’ in this situation. For example, I have been told by professionals I will probably always need psyciatric medication to be functional, no matter how good my self talk and lifestyle is. Accepting that, I think, is healthy. It would not be healthy, however, to decide that I ‘cannot’ have a good life.

But you do not have unlimited time and resources. When I said ‘what are your barriers’, plenty of you probably went “MONEY! IT’S MONEY, YOU ASSHOLE” Sometimes it means knowing an issue can’t be addressed until you have money/time/surgery. 

It’s okay to put things on the backburner. If you’re trying to figure out ‘how do I keep from being homeless next week’, you might decide ‘how do I eat more vegetables’ is not your most pressing issue.

You can also decide a fix isn’t worth the cost. Maybe you could afford knee surgery, but you don’t think the amount it would improve your life would be worth the expense or risk. Maybe you could take the stairs to class, but it would leave you too exhausted to pay attention.

Sometimes you realize ‘I want something more than I want to fix this’, and... that’s okay. Sometimes you aren’t ready for a change. Sometimes you don’t need to change. But if the change really is something you want:

4. Make a plan that directly confronts your barriers?

You’ve already broken your barriers into small, objective issues. Now you can start working on those issues. 

If you know you need to eat better, and your main barrier is impulse control, don’t plan to ‘stop eating junk food’. Figure out healthy, easy snacks you like and leave them in plain view.

Find ways to make chores easier. Learn to cook while seated, try playing music while you clean, find what works for you. If it doesn’t work, try something else.

Talk frankly with the people in your  life. Try to help them understand what your barriers are and make them allies in overcoming them. “I know it’s important I do this, and I am trying. Here is the specific element I am struggling with. Do you have advice for that?”

I particularly love this conversational tactic with doctors. Here is a conversation I had with a lot of doctors:

Doctor: You need to fix this habit. Me: I know. I’m sorry. Doctor: It’s really important. Here’s why it’s important.

I would get upset and defensive that the doctor seemed to think I didn’t care, and that the solution was just shaming me into caring more. The doctor would probably see me as unwilling to change.

Here is the conversation we have now:

Doctor:  You need to fix this habit. Me: That’s a priority for me too, but I’m really struggling with x and y hasn’t helped. Do you have any advice that helps people with x?

This either gets me advice on my actual problem instead of just being shamed for not fixing it, or it forces the doctor to change the topic and perhaps redirect me to somebody with more experience.

Write down lists of issues you want to address with your doctor. Focus on concrete steps and goals, and celebrate every win. People might not see how hard your fight is, but if getting out of bed in the morning is a fight, you have every reason to celebrate it.

But your barrier is NOT that you are lazy. It is not that you are bad or stupid or worthless. You cannot hate yourself healthy.

Your struggles are real, and the steps to overcome them are based in understanding, agency, and support, not self loathing.

[avidreider]

Journals Part 1 ~ flatline (Spencer Reid x Reader)

Journals Series 

Based on the song, “Flatline” by Justin Bieber. 

Summary: Spencer is physically and emotionally distant and Reader decides that she won’t tolerate it anymore.

Pairing: (Pre-Prison) Spencer Reid x Reader. 

CW: angst, cursing. 

Key: Y/N = your name, italicized = unspoken thoughts, bold = texts/emails/notes, bold + italicized = song lyrics. 

-- I do not own rights to the gif nor the song. -- 

When you and Spencer first started dating, you couldn’t have been happier if you tried. He was always so attentive and caring and all of your previous relationship trauma and insecurities melted away. He had been rather transparent about the fact that he came with a past of traumatic experiences of his own, but he refused to weigh you down with the details of all that baggage. His friends vaguely explained that he suffered from addiction and lost a past girlfriend at the hands of an unsub. However, you never discussed any of this with Spencer. Regardless, you assured him that you would stand by him no matter what. 

Your relationship progressed somewhat quickly, but it was because the feelings you had for each other ran so deep. You didn’t get to spend much time with him - you were a medical resident and the nature of Spencer’s job significantly limited your time together. You dedicated large chunks of time to your own job, though, so you never complained about how much time he spent with the BAU. 

You did begin to complain, however, when he would leave in the middle of the night for ‘work,’ but then you’d get a call from Penelope or Emily asking you two what you were up to on an evening off. The first time it happened, you assumed that he just needed a break after a long case. But the second, third, and fourth time you became quite insecure. And this night, the fifth time, you felt the anger before anything else. 

“Sorry, baby, but I have to head into work. They need me,” Spencer had said to you, as he walked into the bathroom to get ready. You were immediately suspicious, so you called Emily to confirm your suspicions. 

“Hello? You okay, Y/N?” she said when she answered on the second ring. 

“Yes, Em, I’m fine! How are you?”

“I’m okay. I think Morgan, Garcia, and I are gonna go out for some drinks if you and Reid would like to come!” 

You felt your eyebrows shoot up, even though you weren’t necessarily surprised. “I’ll discuss it with him. Thanks for the invite!” and with that, you hung up. 

“So Spence, what’s the case that has you rushing off at 11pm?”

“Oh, we won’t know until we get there,” he responded. 

“That’s so unfair that they’re making you work, especially when half the team is out clubbing,” you spat, daring him to deny the truth that you already knew. 

When he said nothing, you inquired, “This isn’t the first time that you have said you had to go work when you didn’t. So what is going on? Did you fall off the wagon? Is there another woman? Did you lose the feelings you had for me?”

“No, Y/N, God -- how can you think that I’ve been doing drugs?”

“That wasn’t the only thing that I asked you, Spence.” 

“I have been going into the office to help JJ with the backlog of paperwork that she has to deal with. I also go there just to clear my head. I don’t want to just sit around here with you when I can’t focus on you. I don’t want to bring my work or other problems home with me -- I want to keep this apartment a happy place.” 

“Oh Spence, it’s our apartment. Of course it’s a happy place. I don’t want you to feel like you have to face your demons alone. If there is anything you want to talk about, I am here for you. I love you, babe, and your problems are my problems,” you assured, as your rubbed soothing circles onto his back. 

He hugged you back, and a few moments passed before he spoke again. “I don’t want my problems to end up being your problems, Y/N. You are so incredible, and-and I’m sorry, don’t take this the wrong way, but I just need some space.” 

Your mouth was wide with shock. Space? How could you take that in the ‘right’ way? How could he ask you for space when you only spent a few short hours with him in the span of a week? Your residency takes up between 40-80 of those hours, and his job usually takes up more than that. You also make a conscious effort to spend time with his friends and your friends, as well as designate time for yourselves. You practice self-care or go to the gym, while he sits at his desk and reads, or writes letters to his mother. When you do spend time together, you rarely argue. You snuggle as he reads to you, or talks about his cases (and you talk about your day at the hospital), you watch your favorite television shows, or you’re asleep. You thought that you had the perfect relationship. But apparently Spencer didn’t agree. 

“I’m just gonna go out and get drinks with Emily, Derek, and Penelope. You can come if you want, but otherwise, just enjoy your ‘space,’“ you said, with a snarky emphasis on the last word. And with that, you got dressed and walked out the door. 

You stumble back into your apartment early the next morning, and end up passing out on the couch. When you wake up, Spencer is sitting in the chair next to you with almost a guilty look on his face. “Good morning,” he said once he saw your eyes open. 

“Good morning,” you mumble. 

“So, I’ve been meaning to tell you something. I’ve agreed to be a volunteer teacher at a local high school. They’re incredibly short-staffed, and they want me to step in when I can for physics, biology, and psychology. I-I also agreed to be a mentor for the school’s chess club,” he said. 

“Okay, Spence. That sounds like a great opportunity,” you replied with feigned optimism. Great. Even less time I get to spend with him. But whatever. If he needs this much space from me, I’ll give it to him. 

The next couple weeks passed slowly; Spencer was only home early in the mornings (while you had to get ready for your shift at the hospital), and late at night (when you were already asleep). You loved that he was so passionate about his job, but you were beginning to feel resentful that he chose to take on all these other commitments when it was clear he was neglecting your relationship. 

Lately you've been busy, Wonderin' if you miss me, Why did you go against me? I just wanna know... How come you act so different? Talk to me, I'll listen, All the love I'm givin', don't act like you don't know...  

You hadn’t been intimate in nearly 3 weeks; the last time being a few days before you went out for drinks with Emily, and you hadn’t felt like he truly loved you since even before that night. And quite frankly, those feelings were justified because he hadn’t said it since then, either. He still called you periodically, and texted you when calling you wasn’t an option, but those conversations were incredibly dry and only made you feel worse. In a desperate attempt to try to feel connected to Spencer, you logged onto his laptop on his desk and, if you were being honest with yourself, started snooping. You found that he had been emailing a teacher at the high school that he volunteers at. You wanted so badly to trust him, but the feeling your gut told you to read them.

To: Ms. Everett

From: Spencer Reid 

Re: Biology 

Ms. Everett 

Thank you so much for letting me lead the lecture on genetics. You sure know your stuff! Please don’t take this the wrong way, but I can’t believe that you teach high school! You are a brilliant woman, I can’t believe you aren’t out there finding the cure for cancer or something. If there is anything else that I can do for you or your class, please don’t hesitate to email or call me! 

With Regards, 

Spencer Reid

Call him? Does that mean she already has his phone number? I don’t think that Spencer has ever called me brilliant before, either. She’s so brilliant, but his girlfriend who is actually a doctor isn’t?

You knew that your thoughts were relatively petty, but you didn’t care. Your feelings were hurt. You kept reading anyway. 

To: Spencer Reid 

From: Ms. Everett 

Re: Biology 

Dr. Reid, 

Oh please, call me Lila! And I thoroughly enjoyed your lecture! You are one captivating man! And thank you, but you don’t have to stroke my ego! I considered medical school as well as graduate research positions but my true calling is teaching children! Maybe one day I can teach your sweet Godson! I will give you a call! If you don’t have any plans this weekend, perhaps we can grab a coffee? 

Love, Lila 

LOVE? Is that a stab at me? I took the ‘easy way out’ by going to medical school? Who is this bitch?

To: Ms. Everett

From: Spencer Reid 

Oh, you don’t have to use my honorific! Spencer or Spence is fine. And that is incredible. I love teaching children as well, obviously. I have a feeling Henry would love you! And yes, coffee would be great. 

Spencer

Hmm. Is it considered cheating to get a coffee with some strange woman who you flirt with virtually (and do not tell your live-in girlfriend about)? Something is telling me ‘yes.’  Also, he’s letting her call him “Spence”?

You read a few more of his emails along those same lines, until you felt sick. After the nausea passed, the rage came. You pulled out your phone to send Spencer a text message. 

At first, you just wanted to see if he’d lie. 

You sent a text that said: Hey babe! How’s work going? If you don’t have a case this weekend I’d like to go out on a date or something. I miss you! 

Hi baby. I might have plans, it depends on the day... he responded. 

What plans? You asked innocently. 

Just professional plans. That’s kinda vague, Spence. 

Coffee plans, with super brilliant people? 

Yeah, boring stuff. But I’m sure that you and I can still do something. 

The rage began to build as you realized that he was actively keeping Lila a secret from you. 

Oh SPENCE. When were you going to tell me that you want space from me just so you can spend more time with some slutty biology teacher?! 

Your phone buzzed almost immediately. 

What are you talking about?

Don’t play dumb with me Spencer. “You’re a brilliant woman”?! Are you kidding me? How long were you planning on keeping Lila a secret from me?

This time the buzzing was more persistent. He was calling you. 

“What, Spencer?”

“How do you know about Lila? Did you go through my computer?” 

You let out a frustrated sigh, “Yeah, obviously. And I don’t regret it, because apparently you were never gonna tell me about her. Which isn’t even surprising, you don’t talk to me at all anymore. But if you were gonna cheat on me, maybe you should’ve just broke up with me instead!” 

“She’s just a friend, Y/N, and I never cheated on you! I never would. I-” but he didn’t get to finish, because you hung up. You have been so close to your breaking point these past couple weeks, and Lila was that little push it took to send you over the edge. You packed as many clothes your suitcase could fit and took off to your best friend’s house. She would let you stay, no questions asked. And that was a good thing, because you didn’t wanna talk about it just yet. She let you in her home with open arms, prepared to be that beacon of emotional support you’d been lacking from Spencer. 

---Spencer’s POV---

COME ON, Y/N, ANSWER THE PHONE! Ugh, why did you have to go through my computer? Are you that insecure?

The phone kept ringing, but to no surprise, she didn’t answer. 

I’ll call Derek. Everyone knows he’s had his fair share of relationship issues. 

“Hey pretty boy, what’s up?” He answered. 

“Derek, Y/N won’t answer her phone.” 

“Why? What did you do?”

“Why do you assume that it was me who did something wrong?”

He just laughed. 

“What’s so funny?”

“Pretty boy, for a genius you can be so dumb sometimes. I assume that it was you who made a mistake for two reasons. For one, you called me for what I can only assume is advice on how to fix it. And for two, you’re the man. It’s usually the men who mess up in relationships. So what’s going on?”

He had me there. “Okay so for the past couple weeks things between us have been... off. I’m not sure what I was feeling, but I told her that I needed space. I think I got scared because we established a routine. It made me nervous. So I picked up some hobbies.”

“What kind of hobbies?” His suspicious tone made me feel guilty. 

“I volunteered at the high school to help with some classes and to mentor the school’s chess club. But while I was there, I met this biology teacher -”

“A female biology teacher, I assume.” 

“Yes, how did you know that?”

“Reid, I know where this is going.” 

Where was this going?

“She’s a pretty woman, huh?”

“Well, yes, Lila is pretty and smart, but so what? I’m allowed to have friends. But anyways, her and I began emailing and we planned on getting coffee and Y/N got on my laptop and read those emails and -”

“You can’t be that stupid, Reid. First of all, you don’t actually want space from Y/N. You are always beaming after spending time with her. You love her more than you love yourself, and everyone knows that. Everyone but her, and probably Lila now - and that is probably one of the worst things you can do. You can’t let your woman feel like she has to compete with other women, and you can’t let other women feel like they have the chance to steal you away. That’s how you lose a good woman. You were emailing this woman, and you set up a date with her? After reducing the already limited time that you have to spend with your girlfriend, who is also incredibly pretty and smart too, I might add.” 

“Oh...” OH! She’s not insecure, I’m just an idiot. I didn’t even want space at all, I was just scared. I just didn’t want to get complacent. When my parents got complacent in their relationship, it ended. Same with Hotch and Hailey. And Penelope and Kevin. Oh my God. What did I do?

“Exactly, pretty boy. You better show up at home with some flowers and chocolates and be prepared to kiss her feet. And I’d take a break from lecturing at that school, too.” 

“Yeah, no doubt. Thanks Morgan.” 

“Go get her, tiger.” 

After hanging up, I opened the messaging app on my phone to send her a text just to let her know that I am willing and ready to fix my mistake. 

Hey baby. I just want you to know that I won’t volunteer at the school anymore, if you don’t want me to. I will also take you out this weekend, wherever you want. I love you, and I’m on the way home. 

I was out there on the road, life out of control, She became a victim to my busy schedule, And I know that it's not fair, that don't mean that I don't care - This one's dedicated to the girl out there...  

She probably won’t respond, but that’s fine, we will talk when I get home. I asked the florist for a sunflower and rose combination, and bought food from her favorite Mexican restaurant downtown. I also stopped at the grocery to get a tub of ice cream along with chocolate, caramel, and strawberry syrup, with candy and sprinkles to make sundaes. I one-upped Derek’s recommendation, and I couldn’t wait to tell him about it. 

“Baby, I’m home! We need to talk. I am so, so, sorry sweetheart... Y/N?” I shout, even though it’s pretty clear she’s not here. 

Setting my bag on the end table, I notice a note on the refrigerator. 

Spencer, 

I am really sorry that I didn’t end up being good enough for you. I hope you don’t mind but I’ll be back for the rest of my things eventually, but if you still need space from me, it can wait. Thank you for the best year of my life. You were amazing, and I hope that Lila makes you feel the way that you made me feel. I will always love you, and I know that you will continue to do amazing things in life. Tell your mom that I love her, too. 

Love, Y/N

It was actually 15 months, 6 days, and 43 minutes, approximately. 

I dialed her number without even thinking about it. Still no answer. 

I can’t believe that she left. It feels like I’m drowning - my breath is caught in my chest. BREATHE SPENCER!

She took most of her clothes. She took her computer and books too. She’s gone. She left me. Oh no. What have I done? 

Girl you always catch me at the bad time, When I know you probably think it's a lie... And I know I told you last time was the last time, How could you pull the plug and leave me flatline?

Not breathin', what is it that I'm not seein'? Said she's leavin', damn I can't believe it... It's like my heart's bleedin' - Knowin' that you don't need me. Shut my heart down, now I don't know what Imma do now...

[nanapandaz]

Cognitive Impairment in Schizophrenia

Disclaimer: I am not a mental health professional, I can’t diagnose you. If you think you have a mental illness please reach out to your doctor or a mental health professional.

For schizophrenics like myself, some of the most stigmatized, and sensationalized symptoms are the positive ones, meaning delusions, hallucinations, and movement disorders to some extent. You see them in textbooks and in the media; seeing, hearing, smelling or feeling things that aren’t real. Believing strange ideas, and this is my own example, like that the alien government lizard people are coming after you. These draw the most attention from the public eye, and I can’t blame them, alien government lizard people is pretty out there. But what about the less talked about symptoms such as negative and cognitive symptoms? Well, this essay will examine the cognitive side of a schizophrenia diagnosis.

According to Columbia University (2016), “many people with [Schizophrenia] also have cognitive deficits, including problems with short- and long-term memory.” They go on to say that cognitive factors can be the most disabling for people, leading to difficulty holding down a job and maintaining social relationships. They don’t have many answers as to the cause or cure for memory problems. Sucks to be us I guess. I personally have a plethora of issues with memory, short term and long term. I find myself lost when the dialogue of TV shows gets even slightly complicated because I immediately forget what was said, maybe that’s just me but it takes a toll on my self-esteem when I can't follow slightly complicated dialogue. But anyway, back to memory. Apparently when a group of healthy controls were compared to a group with schizophrenia, the healthy group, unsurprisingly, did better at memory tasks. In fact the health control groups brains showed increased brain activity the tests got harder and decreased activity when it got easier while the people with schizophrenia showed significantly weaker activity across the board.

According to Bowie and Harvey (2006) cognitive symptoms are the central feature of schizophrenia. As well as that these impairments may even present before the emergence of positive symptoms. They also found that there were “moderate deficits in attention, verbal fluency, working memory, and processing speed, with superimposed severe deficits in declarative verbal memory and executive functioning.” What is executive functioning? Well to quote Goodman (2021), “[e]xecutive functioning skills help you get things done. These skills are controlled by an area of the brain called the frontal lobe.” Things executive functioning helps you do is “manage time, pay attention, switch focus, plan and organize, remember details, avoid saying or doing the wrong thing, do things based on your experience, and multitask” (Goodman, 2021).

I’ll cover some ways to deal with executive dysfunction in a later essay.

Most people with schizophrenia will show some kind of cognitive impairment, but the severity will vary across different people. One interesting thing about these cognitive impairments is that they will remain relatively stable over time. There are some different types of impairments that I will summarize.

General Intelligence

I take some offence at the description that all people with schizophrenia have lower IQ’s, I mean there are/were some very smart people with it, like John Nash, or the people Cernis, Vassos, Brebion, McKenna, Murray, David & MacCabe (2015) studied, finding that there is “a high-IQ variant of schizophrenia that is associated with markedly fewer negative symptoms than typical schizophrenia” However the science seems to be overwhelmingly favourable in the direction that people with it have lower IQ’s as a group. On the other hand, I don’t know what kind of people they picked for their healthy control group, because if they were all university grads then it’s not really fair. So take this with a grain of salt. While the tests say that we are as a group, less intelligent than the “general” population it doesn’t mean you specifically are not intelligent. We can be just as successful as anyone else.

Attention

This one is simple, people with schizophrenia have a deficit in their ability to maintain their attention, this occurs even before the first psychotic episode.

Working memory

I have a terrible working memory, bad enough for it to be considered a learning disability. However I’m not alone in this, many people with schizophrenia have some kind of dysfunction in working memory, and apparently specifically verbal working memory. Bowie and Harvey (2006) state that “Working memory can be conceptualized as the ability to maintain and manipulate informative stimuli.” This is in contrast to attention span, with working memory being more cognitively challenging and attention span being more simple. In working memory, “The information must be held online for processing, but does not necessarily transfer to long-term storage, unlike episodic memory” (Bowie and Harvey, 2006). And poor memory can even affect social and interpersonal relationships because of the inability to pay attention to “multiple streams of information” Bowie and Harvey, 2006).

Verbal fluency

People like us sometimes find it rather difficult to speak in a coherent fashion, I remember many instances where I’ve tried to speak only for word salad to spill out of my mouth, and the looks of confusion and worry on other peoples faces is just great, really what I wanted to happen, not embarrassing at all. This inability to speak is due to “poor storage of verbal information as well as inefficient retrieval of information from semantic network” (Bowie and Harvey, 2006). Furthermore, "information that is stored is not always retrieved as a result of this inability to properly access semantic networks” (Bowie and Harvey, 2006).

Verbal and learning memory

A main impairment of schizophrenia is the difficulty of retaining verbal information. From what I understand, recognition memory seems to be able to work well in most cases, but “the pattern of deficits in schizophrenia tends to be reduced rates of learning over multiple exposure trials and poor recall of learned information” (Bowie and Harvey, 2006). So basically it takes a while for us to learn something but once we do we have good recognition memory. Now, recognition memory is the ability to recall something when you’ve seen it before, so I think what happens is if you’re able to process the information into long term memory you’ll be able to recall when you encounter that information again. Maybe I’m totally wrong, I don’t know.

Executive functioning

Now most schizophrenics have difficulties with most of all of the processes involved with executive dysfunction. Bowie and Harvey (2006) say that “schizophrenia patients have trouble adapting to changes in the environment that require different behavioral responses” which is directly due to issues with executive dysfunction. Furthermore, this “inflexibility” is highly associated with what Bowie and Harvey call “occupational difficulties.” This makes sense, when someone can’t plan, practice self-care, engage in social and interpersonal matters or participate in community functions, it’s gonna take a toll on your work life.

Treatment

Atypical antipsychotics seem to be the best treatment for cognitive impairments, though the results are sorta weak, Bowie and Harvey (2006) admit that “they have had very limited, if any, success in producing cognitive improvements. However, the search for new compounds designed specifically for cognitive enhancement in schizophrenia continues to be a promising area for future research.”

However there is also behavioural treatments, but there isn’t a lot of research on this topic. On the other hand, what little research there is, is very promising. “These strategies include training on computerized tasks similar to existing cognitive tests, teaching new learning strategies, training on novel tasks, and/or performing tasks repetitively” (Bowie and Harvey, 2006).

In the end, it seems that a combination of medication and therapy is the key. On the other hand, research by Everding (2005) states that “memory problems in schizophrenia can indeed be reduced and suggests that helping people use the right memorization strategy is critical to success.” The right strategies seem to be to remember more ‘deeply’ or according to Jantzi, Mengi, Serfaty, et al., (2019) to engage in retrieval practice, also Antzi, Mengi, Serfaty, et al.’s (2019) study is “the first to demonstrate that retrieval practice is also superior to restudy in improving later recall in patients with schizophrenia presenting with episodic memory impairment.” This is great news for us because it presents a real way of improving our memories, which apparently most of us need.

REFERENCES

Study finds brain marker of poor memory in schizophrenia patients: possible key to understanding and treating cognitive symptoms of the disease, (2016). Columbia University. Retrieved from https://www.cuimc.columbia.edu/news/study-finds-brain-marker-poor-memory-schizophrenia-patients

Bowie, C. R., & Harvey, P. D. (2006). Cognitive deficits and functional outcome in schizophrenia. Neuropsychiatric disease and treatment, 2(4), 531–536. Retrieved from https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2671937/

Černis ,E,. Vassos, E,. Brébion, G,. McKenna, PJ,. Murray, RM,. David, AS,. MacCabe, JH. (2015). Schizophrenia patients with high intelligence: A clinically distinct sub-type of schizophrenia? Eur Psychiatry. (5):628-32. Retrieved from https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/25752725/

Gerry Everding (2005). Memory study shows brain function in schizophrenia can improve with support, holds promise for cognitive rehabilitation: need cues, memory aids. Washington University. Retrieved from https://source.wustl.edu/2005/07/memory-study-shows-brain-function-in-schizophrenia-can-improve-with-support-holds-promise-for-cognitive-rehabilitation/

Jantzi, C., Mengin, A., Serfaty, D. et al. (2019). Retrieval practice improves memory in patients with schizophrenia: new perspectives for cognitive remediation. BMC Psychiatry 19, 355. Retrieved from https://bmcpsychiatry.biomedcentral.com/articles/10.1186/s12888-019-2341-y#citeas

Goodman, B. (2021). Executive function and executive dysfunction disorders. WebMD. Retrieved from https://www.webmd.com/add-adhd/executive-function

[strangertheory]

Do you think that portraying a portion of our characters as alters would remove their depth? Would portraying female characters and characters of color as alters of Will remove their agency? This is not my personal opinion but I’ve seen this topic come up as a concern with the DID theory and seeing as you answer every ask so thoughtfully.

DID is a widely misunderstood condition due to the way in which it has been portrayed in a lot of popular media, but also because it is a unique condition that most people have not spent a lot of time learning more about. When fans are ignorant and say incorrect things like “alters aren’t real” they are perpetuating incorrect information about DID and being prejudiced against those who have DID.

“El is her own person! With her own free will!”

- Nancy Wheeler, season 3

DID is a real medical condition. People need to educate themselves more on the topic before they engage in (incorrectly) asserting that El being an alter would somehow make her less important or “less real” than Will. If the theory that Will and El are both part of a DID System is correct: they share the same mind and their brain belongs to them both. They’re two different, separate states of consciousness in their shared mind. Shared.

Alters are not imaginary friends, and they are not hallucinations. Alters are distinct, separate states of identity within a single human brain. A host in a DID System does not “control” other alters. They are not puppets or characters in a fictionalized story that was invented by a person’s imagination. And it’s very important that people treat alters as unique individuals.

Describing an alter as “not real” is incorrect and ignorant. Alters are just as real as you or me. Fans, when discussing or criticizing the theory that Stranger Things is about a DID System, need to be aware that any time they criticize this theory and say something like “alters are not real” that they’re being prejudiced against real alters in real DID Systems who might read their comments online and be hurt. Alters are each unique individuals, and they are real.

Alters have their own agency. They have real feelings and experiences. They have their own free will. Their sense of identity and their memories and experiences are separate from the experiences of other alters. Even when alters are co-conscious together they will still perceive of those shared experiences differently.

To make a very simplistic analogy: imagine many people living in the same body that sometimes can interact with one another face-to-face in spaces within their shared subconscious mind. (Those spaces are referred to as “internal worlds.”)

Do you consider yourself real? How do you define your identity? You probably, like me, define yourself by the many experiences you have had throughout your life and by your memories and your relationships with other people. That is how Alters develop their sense of identity, too: through their real memories, relationships, and experiences. But a key difference is that they exist together in one mind and body. But they are all real. One alter is not more or less “real” than another alter.

Anyone that takes issue with the concept of El and Will possibly taking turns being conscious in their shared body in the external world might need to be wary of seeming prejudiced against trans identities and experiences. El is a girl and Will is a boy.

Regarding your point about the concept of Lucas potentially being an alter: I personally suspect that Lucas exists in the external physical world as a friend no matter what is going on in the story, but if there were also an alter in the DID System that was named Lucas and was based off of their friend named Lucas, then that alter-Lucas would be understood to perhaps have the same physical appearance within the internal world of the mind but would not have a Black identity in the same way that friend-Lucas does (obviously) because the lived experiences that this alter has would not be the same as a Black person. (This is a very good and complex question. I’m not sure I can do it justice. But it is definitely important to clarify that no, an alter in a DID System is not going to have a racial identity that is equivalent to racial identities and experiences in the external world unless that identity does, in fact, reflect their body’s physical appearance and cultural heritage in the external, physical world.)

Many DID Systems will have alters with different genders, ages, races, etc. but this is not the result of a conscious choice. Hosts, who are simply alters that are in control of the body the most often in the physical external world, don’t consciously “create” their alters or control them in any way. And from what I currently understand about DID (and keep in mind I am just a layperson that has done some research of my own, I’m not a medical professional) the appearance of an alter is speculated to oftentimes be based on a person’s subconscious understandings of traits they’ve observed in the external world that they believe would empower them to deal with a specific traumatic situation better. Their subconscious brain went “Who would be the most capable of dealing with this horrible situation? Who could deal with this more easily?” And this is why oftentimes an alter might be based on a person that they know in their life. I think that it is highly likely that the DID System in Stranger Things might feature many alters based on people that they know in the external world. Friends, family members, local bullies (like Billy Hargrove, perhaps?) etc. Alters based on the subconscious mind’s impression of people from the external world are referred to as introjects. But an alter is not an imaginary friend: that alter then becomes part of their own mind that has taken on these traits subconsciously.

Will as a host in a DID System would not have any conscious control over his alters any more than he has control over any other person in his life: that’s not how DID works. Alters have their own agency. Alters with certain roles have greater access to the DID System than hosts out of necessity, and therefore I believe a case could be made that at times Will is the one that has less agency. In some DID Systems hosts sometimes have absolutely no access to their internal worlds at all, and when they lose consciousness everything is like being asleep for them. And in other cases DID System hosts might have only partial access or a lesser level of awareness in the System’s internal worlds. From what I’ve read each DID System has its own unique structure based on what was needed by them in order to survive certain traumatic events in their shared lives.

Part of the reason hosts have limited access is because the DID System is an elaborate subconscious coping strategy that the brain has constructed in order to protect hosts from trauma so they can continue surviving and dealing with every day life and taking care of themselves. If hosts were given complete access to the System in the same way that certain alters have access then hosts would be exposed to traumatic memories and experiences that they might not be ready to deal with and that would defeat the entire purpose of the DID System having been established in the first place. Think of it as levels of security access in a building: not everyone has the same access granted on their little door swipe cards. Hosts oftentimes have very limited access because their brain is storing their memories beyond their reach. Alters will each have memories that the host(s) do not.

If any fans dislike the concept of Will being a host in the System because they perceive of this as some sort of “controlling” or “powerful” role in a DID System: hosts generally have to deal with an arguably frightening and intimidating lack of control over their own mind and over the System. Hosts need to establish communication with their alters and trust in order to coordinate shared decision making because they generally, by design, do NOT have access to certain parts of their mind and the internal worlds because they’re not supposed to. The only influence that hosts have on their alters’ decisions is established through communication and agreement just like if you made an agreement to pick your neighbor up from school at 3pm. There’s nothing stopping you from deciding not to do that, but you choose to do so because you’ve established trust with your neighbor and they know they can rely on you.

“Friends don’t lie!” The importance of alters telling the truth to each other would be critical to their shared survival. I should hope nobody is lying if you have no way of being sure what your body had been doing all day while you weren’t conscious in the external world and you need to check in and ask other alters what they did. (Have a great day! Don’t forget to lock the front door. Can you cook some pasta and make sure we eat tonight? Okay, cool. Thanks! Wait: you had a fight with mom? And you didn’t tell us? Not cool! Now we don’t know why she’s angry at us and have no idea what was said. Ugh.)

But to return back to your original question: although I understand that many fans might be unfamiliar with DID and with the concept of alters, I hope that fans would seek to better understand the condition and would not be so deeply disrespectful of real DID Systems that exist and suggest that they’re somehow not “real” because of their condition. Inevitably there will always be those that don’t understand and who don’t respect others’ experiences.

I hope I answered your question sufficiently! This was such a good question, and I’m really glad that you Asked. Thank you!

[makefuturetoday]

What are the best nursing colleges in Bangalore?

BSC Nursing courses are in high demand all over India. Especially students have a craze to join nursing colleges in Bangalore. Nursing is one of the fields where there is a growing demand for qualified people. As a result, candidates must be aware of the top nursing colleges in India as well as in Bangalore in 2021. Nursing education consists of both classroom and clinical experiences. Candidates can choose from a variety of specializations and courses in nursing, based on their interests. 

Nursing courses are available at both the undergraduate and postgraduate levels at a variety of colleges and universities. One need to take Nursing entrance examinations at the college/university, state, and national levels for admission to various programmes. Nursing courses are divided into three categories: B.Sc Nursing, B.Sc (Post-Basic) Nursing, and M.Sc Nursing. Nursing students must find the right organisation to help them to develop their abilities. Among all over India, you will get the best nursing colleges in Bangalore.

 Though there are many top colleges, here I am mentioning the top nursing colleges in Bangalore-

 1.      NATIONAL SCHOOL/COLLEGE OF NURSING - [NCN], BANGALORE

 National College of Nursing believes in preparing professional nurses from all over the world to address the major difficulties of nursing service. For optimal professional efficacy throughout their careers, the Institution trains its students to develop the ability to assess circumstances and problems critically and take responsibility for their further education.

2.      SHRINIDHI INSTITUTE OF NURSING - [SIN], BANGALORE

 This institution offers M.Sc. Nursing, Post B.Sc. Nursing, B.Sc. Nursing, and G.N.M. nursing programmes (General Nursing and Midwifery). They believe there is a better approach to learning new things at Shrinidhi Nursing Institution. Through their well-experienced faculty and management, they focus on simplifying nursing principles.

 3.      AKSHAYA GROUP OF EDUCATIONAL INSTITUTIONS - [ASCN], BANGALORE

 The Akshaya Institute of Nursing Science, Tumkur is managed by Akshaya Education Trust(R) a premier educational institute in Karnataka established in 2003 as an accredited institution Affiliated to Govt. of Karnataka, Rajiv Gandhi University of Health Sciences, Karnataka Nursing Council and Indian Nursing Council. This college now attracts students from all over India due to its high standards, comprehensive facilities, and reputation for quality.

 4.      JUPITER INSTITUTIONS - [JUPITER], BANGALORE

 Jupiter College and School of Nursing was established in 2004 to produce high-quality nurses. Because there is a high need for nurses around the world, which is expected to continue for the next ten years, we at our school aspire to meet a portion of that demand. Our campus, which spans two acres in a high region near Nelamangala, has become a landmark in its own right. The campus provides a safe environment for all students. The hostel and mess facilities are given special attention to meet the needs of all students.

 5.      SAPTHAGIRI INSTITUTE OF MEDICAL SCIENCES & RESEARCH CENTRE - [SIMSRC], BANGALORE

 The Sri Srinivasa academic & public trust in Bangalore created the Sapthagiri Institute of Medical Sciences & Research Centre (SIMSRC) with the sole purpose of delivering high-quality medical education. The Trust has taken up the Sapthagiri School of Engineering and the construction of Solitaire, a four-star structure with a lingering welcome. Sapthagiri Institute of Medical Sciences and Research Centre might apply to be a national centre of excellence in medical education and health care services. To achieve its aim, the Institute will provide great academic competence across all disciplines of medicines and associated health sciences in a very secure environment.

 6.      SHANTIDHAMA COLLEGE OF NURSING - [SCN], BANGALORE

 In today's ever-changing competitive world, Shantidhama College of Nursing was founded to produce skilled and efficient nurses for a new tomorrow. Our major purpose is to provide the greatest possible NURSING EDUCATION AND CLINICAL TRAINING.

 7.      MAHATMA GANDHI PROFESSIONAL COLLEGE OF NURSING - [MGP], BANGALORE

 In the Indian state of Karnataka, the Mahatma Gandhi Professional College of Nursing is located in Bangalore. It is connected with Rajiv Gandhi University and is accredited by the Indian Nursing Council (INC). MGPCN, Bangalore, offers four courses in one stream, nursing, and three degrees, GNM, BSc, and MSc. Its pupils do not have access to a hostel. There are also other campus amenities, such as a library.

Hopefully, this article has provided you with useful information. So don't waste your time if you're a nursing student. Instead, begin your study with the city's main organisations. But before joining any of them, it is advisable to take proper guidance from experts. You can contact MakeFutureToday for free career counselling and suggestions.

[dxmedstudent]

Hi Dx, I hope you're well! I would like to ask if you could express your thoughts/opinions on the effect of medical influencers (medical students/doctors who create social media profiles to promote products/services for for-profit companies) on the public perception of medical professionals? I personally can't help feel that there's something unethical about it but I am very keen to heed your opinion because you are one of the most conscientious and introspective professionals I have encountered

I find this tricky, and I've been thinking about this. To be honest, I find having a public persona on social media under your name, tricky full stop. I find medtwitter mildly anxiety inducing, and it feels like it's very easy to reply to something quickly with not the best phrasing and for conversation to miss a lot of nuances. I don't know who decided that a microblogging platform was where everyone is going to discuss deep and in depth issues that you can't bloody summarise in 140 characters, but somehow everyone is rolling with it despite the fact that being forced to sum things up pithily actively contributes to a lot of the confusion and hostility and side-picking that goes on.

Plus it can be hard to mantain a social media presence that others find acceptable, and taking advertising out of the equation, I feel we need to do more to humanise people's online presences. I have friends of friends that I'm not sure whether they are just cautious or possibly the most boring people on the planet because their social media is dry AF. It's worse with non doctors because whilst doctors are dry about medicine, but there are people out there who act like highway maintenance or sewage are the only thing they are even slightly interested in. Now, I'm not sure if they are just very cautious about being professional (or maybe they really are just...boring), but I know that if I was engaging socially under my real name and qualifications I might be very anxious to post anything too personal. But I think we need to normalise professionals revealing a little of themselves and their personality, because that's what makes people human and engaging and likeable. No, I don't' think professionals need to be posting weekly recipes or mommy blogs on their social media, but the odd thing that reminds us they have interests or a life isn't a terrible thing. To me, if our social media could literally be repaced by a bot that churns out bland platitudes, then what's the point in having a public social media presence at all? Now, on to advertising. I've seen plenty of professionals on social media, and it's not uncommon for people to advertise things/be sponsored. If I'm going to say that a lawyer or author or other content creator can have a sponsor, it'd feel unfair for me to say a doctor can't. But I do think there would have to be provisos for me to say it was ethical. I do think that social media still does a rubbish job of people making clear that they are advertising - so often it seems that influencers are covertly being paid a lot of money to speak positively about brands, and this is not always being acknowledged. I find the extent that things are being sponsored now disconcerting, mainly because the extent is often not clear. I find this difficult partly because I'm in the UK. I'm paid by the government (essentially) rather than by patients or my hospital specifically, and having a customer or sponsor relationship with medical companies just isn't how we work - i get paid the same whatever drugs I recommend, and what I recommend will be based on whatever NICE says (usually) and what my local trust has decided. I have a belief that if I professionally endorse something, it should be something I believe in or have used enough to feel it's worth recommending. And I think being doctors, it'd make sense for us to hold our online representatives to this standard. Would I advertise anything? Probably not - I can imagine that I may have occasionally recommended art equipment or tools that I've used, but I can't see myself ever recommending or advertising anything that I wouldn't recommend freely of my own volition. Now, in practice if a doctor advertises a scrubs supplier or something innocuous then I probably won't be too mad, because that is not something that their qualification has any bearing on, and I can buy that they might have a favourite brand of scrubs or pencil or whatever. i.e. I'd be disappointed to find out that they'd never used what they are advertising and are only doing it for the money. But I'd hope that they wouldn't be desperate enough financially to advertise something that they didn't think was good. But personally, if it's something medical, then I feel they'd have to follow what the usual rules are for advertising medical services in their country. I'd expect them not to advertise something unless they make it explicitly clear whether they are receiving funding from the company, and I'd expect them to bring lots of data to back up their assertions - rather like a drug rep brings a power point presentation and takes you over their research when trying to persuade you to prescribe their branded whatever. I also think this is different because drug reps advertise to

scientifically literate people, whereas a doctor on a youtube channel is potentially advertising to anyone, including patients. I think there are also ways you can potentially do this without being unethical. For example, I follow a dermatologist. They do have a social media presence that educates patients on simple conditions. They both discuss products that don't deliver (based on research and experience) and products that make a bigger difference (again according to research, or example like retinols for acne). When asked about specific brands, they might describe some brands that they personally use and they tend to give a range of commonly found examples rather than suggesting that any one brand is the 'right' treatment. They discuss lots of different treatments and AFAIK they aren't sponsored by brands or otherwise receiving freebies from them or making money off them, but if they were I would 100% expect them to make that clear. I don't hate what they do, but I can see ways in which a doctor could go wrong - for example if they didn't declare sponsorships. I also think that over the counter dermatological treatments and cosmetics fall under different licensing than medications, which can blur the lines. In the UK we don't have any advertisement of prescription drugs on TV or in our papers etc. So for me it's wild to imagine that in places like the US people are being bombarded with "ask your doctor if flurgibibbin is right for you!" when most drugs are only useful in relatively specific circumstances - and the right drug for the patient may not be the one that advertises the hardest. To sum up: 1. I'd hope that they don't advertise medical equipment or drugs. 2. If they do, I would want them to make clear the extent of their sponsorship/funding and back it up with data. 3. I'd also want it to follow the laws of that land regarding advertising for those kinds of services. 4. This is in general a bit of a grey area which makes me personally feel uncomfortable and personally I wouldn't accept money from a company to advertise it unless i was 100% going to rave about how great their products were anyway. Even then, I'm not sure I could do it. 5. there are a lot of ways for this to go wrong, and it's a potential ethical minefield.

6. so is social media in general TBH.

7. I believe we need to modernise how we present ourselves on social media because the public need to appreciate that we are people and not bots putting ou the blandest content ever.

[ask-professor-laurel]

Shiverwood Facilities

(This is a WIP, will probably be updated fairly frequently!)

PREFACE

This blog is a headcanon blog- it is not run as canon, and everything said is my own personal headcanons. The goal of this blog is just to explore the Pokemon world and the lore in ways that canon does not, I don’t claim anything I say to be canon or superior to anybody else’s headcanons.

This blog ignores game mechanics, as they don’t apply to the more realistic approach I’m taking here. I’m operating more under a blend of manga and anime mechanics. Storylines in the games may be acknowledged, but game mechanics (level up system, IVs and EVs, etc) are not canon to this blog.

A note from the person who runs this blog: I am by no means a medical expert, or an expert in real life animals. This is all for fun, and is just my fun way of having a blog for a self-indulgent Pokemon OC. Do not take anything I see here as real-life medical or animal handling advice- I am not a professional in any way.

(I also want to note- I was inspired by the Professor Peach blog to start my own, so shoutout to them for giving me the idea!!)

—————

What do we do?

Shiverwood Facilities itself is dedicated both to Pokemon research and Pokemon care. Our work is primarily based on Pokemon behaviour rather than on any specific Pokemon type, with our primary work being researching into a broad spectrum of Pokemon behaviours, and the care of Pokemon sent to us for care or rehabilitation. We also act as an in-between for Pokemon that need more intensive rehabilitation we can’t offer and we can often take in Pokemon that need to be removed from situations, but who don’t have someone to take them in quite yet. 

On the research side of things, I (Professor Laurel) am in charge of most aspects of it. My research is centralized on Pokemon variants, the environmental causes, and the behavioural aspects. I’m also a behaviouralist myself, with a background in that sort of research, so I’m a bit of an encyclopedia on Pokemon behaviour and the habits of various species. I’m most familiar with Dragon, Grass, and Bug type Pokemon, but I can help with pretty much any typing. 

Our site is equipped to deal with Pokemon that need care or minimal rehabilitation- anything more intensive we offer to just hold onto the Pokemon in question until someone more qualified can come and pick them up. Pokemon care here covers mental wellbeing and physical health- we have several behaviouralists onsite, including myself, who can get to the root of the problem and help a Pokemon emotionally, as well as trained medical staff who can deal with anything physical, be it injuries or something chronic. Our medical facilities are equivalent to a Pokemon Centre, and we often take in injured wild Pokemon for short stays before releasing them, but we’ll also help out trainers who pass by, or anyone who needs to bring in their Pokemon for a longer stay, free of charge. Any Pokemon left with us, whether found after being abandoned or being surrendered from bad situations, will most likely be rehomed, if not taken in by someone on staff. 

We offer tours of the facility, as well as tours of the local habitat. These are both guided either by myself or another staff member with a capable team, just in case. Public areas are clearly marked with signs, same with warning signs for any areas that might be dangerous, and areas closed to the public. We also host a couple of events every season that serve to raise awareness of our work, Pokemon care, Pokemon wellbeing, etc for the public. 

—————

Who are you sending your questions to?

Professor Arthur Laurel! That’s me- you can call me Arthur if you want, I’m not big on formalities. I’ve talked about myself already, but I’m the person who will be receiving and answering all of your questions.

I have a smaller team of Pokemon from my trainer days, and all three of them are my trusted partners and some of my very best friends.

Cloudhopper - My Dragonite. She’s been with me the longest and is my partner, gifted to me as a starter as a Dratini when I was going to set out on my Gym Challenge. She’s also a certified service Pokemon, as well as a flying Ride Pokemon. Known for being very protective, usually the one to get me out of trouble, but also very sweet and loving. She does have a wicked sense of humour, though, watch out for if she feels mischievous.

Honeybite - My Appletun. He’s larger than the average Appletun, standing at over 3 feet tall, and known for being the sweetest cuddles there ever was. He’s been with me nearly as long as Cloudhopper. Honeybite’s famous for his cuddles, but don’t underestimate him for his sweet face, he’s quite the little powerhouse when he wants to be, but luckily for us he chooses peace.

Sweetbug - My Vespiquen. She was the last addition to my team, but it’s still been a good decade of having her by my side. She’s a mother hen type between myself and her Combee hive, with a fierce protective streak that has us keeping her hive closed to the public. She often offers honey as a gift to those she cares about, so you can always tell someone’s having a good day when they’ve got a little jar of honey that they didn’t get from me.

—————

Where are we and how can you find us?

Shiverwood is a bit of an exaggeration for a name- we’re located just north of Ballonlea, near the mountains surrounding Wyndon. We’re just north of being hot and humid, and just south of being freezing, so we have some cooler weather for most of the year, although summers can get quite hot. There are designated paths through the thick forest outside of Ballonlea that lead to us, so finding your way isn’t too difficult, but for those who don’t want to travel on foot we can also be reached through Corviknight Taxi and easily spotted from the sky on a flying service Pokemon. We don’t have any water access, the only body of water being a nearby lake, as well as no train access. Walking/riding or flight are the only ways to reach us. 

We’re in this area on the standard Galar map.

—————

What kind of facilities do we have?

MAIN LAB - This is the largest building, it’s the main research facility and where you’ll find me if I’m not cooped up in my lab or out in the field. It also contains a smaller medical facility equipped for minor injuries for both people and Pokemon. Mostly open to the public.

LAUREL’S LAB - Within the Main Lab building. I keep it open to the public for the most part, just know that it’s a mess most of the time, because I believe in organized chaos. My team can be interacted with here if they’re in the mood for it, so if you’ve ever wanted to hug a Dragonite, now’s your chance. 

POKEMON CENTER - It’s not an official Pokemon Center, but we call it one because it’s easier. It’s equipped to handle anything from massive medical emergencies to permanent and semi-permanent residents who require more care. Also equipped for human care. We often offer supervised positions to learning medical students so that they can gain experience under the watchful eyes of our doctors. Some of it is open to the public, but the rooms are restricted to trainer and friends and family only, and surgery rooms are completely off limits.

ZEN AREA - This is a combination of a building and a bigger outdoor area. This is where the behaviouralists care for Pokemon’s mental wellbeing- think of it like therapy for Pokemon. The outdoor area is open to the public, but inside the building only the entrance is accessible. This is because inside is where Pokemon who may be volatile or aggressive are cared for, to prevent them from escaping, or harming other patients. We call it the Zen Area because it can be very soothing, patient or not.

CONTAINMENT - Where we hold the Pokemon we’re temporarily holding for someone to come collect. This area is completely closed off to the public due to the usually very aggressive or unpredictable nature of the Pokemon who stay there. This area is meant for temporary stays- it’s a sizeable enough area of the woods right at the base of the mountain, and there’s a pond in there that’s surprisingly deep. This area can handle a wide variety of Pokemon, temporarily, but it can’t handle every single species. In those cases, we relocate them to another facility as quickly as possible.

GREENHOUSES - These are the warmest places in the facility, mostly inhabited by Grass Types, but also home to quite a few Bug Types. Open to the public and plants are available for purchase, with a wide range from leafy greens to berry saplings. The Pokemon here are tamed, and can be adopted. There is one that’s closed off to the public due to the Combee hive in there, but the honey can be bought!

TRAINING FIELD - Most of us are trainers, so we have a standard battlefield set up for battling! It isn’t equipped for Dynamaxing or Gigantamaxing, but that isn’t a worry since we don’t have the means to do so in this area. Trainers are welcome to use the field for practice, and to see if any staff would like to battle with them. I’m usually up for a good battle unless I’m busy (or recovering from something), and it’s great fun to spectate during your breaks!

MIRROR LAKE - Named after the Giant’s Mirror, Mirror Lake hosts numerous Water Types that prefer the colder waters. We have a Lapras who lives there and she’s very friendly, though she’s never been captured and we don’t allow the public to ride on her. She picks and chooses on the staff who she’ll allow to ride on her back and if you try to force it, she throws you into the water. We have other trained ride Pokemon for water rides, and the shallows can be nice to dip your feet in during the hotter summer, though the water never gets above chilly temperatures.

SHIVERWOOD FOREST - Likely named during the colder winter, Shiverwood is the forest we’re built on the edge of. It’s technically still the Glimwood Tangle, but we have stronger wild Pokemon around, as well as some other species you won’t find south of Ballonlea. There are trail tours, but we generally advise not wandering into the dense forest, as it’s very easy to get lost. You’ll often be able to see the wild Sylveon and Umbreon packs, as well as some Deerling and Sawsbuck herds, lots of Impidimps and a few Morgrems and Grimmsnarls, and plenty of Zubats. If you’re lucky, you might spot a Trevenant! 

MOUNTAIN TRAILS - We have several mountain trails to hike on if you don’t mind the chillier weather up there. Most of the caves have danger signs posted in front of them and we often have staff posted near them, but several caves are open and free to explore! We have a Gigalith who lives deep in the caves who comes out every once in a while and is a real sight to behold, and higher up the mountain for more experienced climbers, you may get to see a very friendly Froslass. Other than that you can expect to find Geodudes, Gravellers and Golems, more Zubats, Roggenrolas and Boldores, and most common Rock Types. If you’re very lucky in the winter, and if you’re patient and brave enough to climb up to see the Froslass, you might just see an Aurorus if you wait around long enough. She’s very elusive, but breathtaking to see. Just don’t get on the wrong side of any Abomasnow or Beartics you see up there- keep to the trails and don’t go without staff. 

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You said events?

I did! We host a couple of events every season, raising awareness for our work and for Pokemon in need to the public. The events we host are all free and are open for everyone, and we always put out plenty of notice and signs so everyone knows!

SPRING

Shiverwood Trek - Every year, early in the spring, we put on the annual hike where everyone who shows up early in the morning joins us for a hike through the forest! We do Pokemonspotting throughout, and this is usually the time where you get to interact with a lot of wild Pokemon and see the sights that Shiverwood has to offer. This is also the only event where we go off the trails- since the foliage won’t have fully come in, it’s much easier to get through, so we always explore “new” (we explore before taking random people in for safety reasons) areas. Afterwards, there’s a lunch and then we offer the usual guided tours. I usually lead this one!

Wake-Up Call - A lot of Pokemon come out of hibernation in the spring, and after sleeping for so long, they’re quite hungry! Come on down and make up baskets of food grown here in the Greenhouses, and join us in going through the forest and setting baskets around for anyone who might need it. You’ll often get to see sleepy Pokemon stumbling around, and let me tell you, you haven’t lived till you’ve seen a sleepy Greedent fall asleep eating the basket it found.

SUMMER

Summer Barbecue Bash!! - Just what it says it is! It’s a massive barbecue party we hold from early afternoon to late into the night every summer. We team up with Kabu and other Fire Type experts to bring in Fire Types to help with the cooking, as well as putting on shows of them displaying their talents and powers. It’s a lot of fun, just remember to bring sunscreen! 

Scavenger Hunt - This one’s more meant for the younger ones, but we host a big scavenger hunt in the easy forest trails and the easy mountain trails for people to complete! Everybody gets a prize for finishing, but first free to finish get a bigger prize just as a bit of incentive. This usually brings out the families, a lot like the barbecue bash, and is a lot of fun to set up and help out with. Staff get to be wonderfully cryptic and unhelpful (unless it’s with the little ones- we’re a bit more helpful there) and it’s good to get out into the sun for a bit. We hold this one a couple times throughout the summer.

FALL

Fall Forage - As fall comes in, a lot of local plant life starts to wither for the colder weather. Right at the beginning, we lead people around for foraging, and anything they find they can choose to donate to us or take home for free. There’s a lot of Pokemonspotting to be had, a lot of exploring, and at the end of the day we take some of what we’ve found and we make a big community pot of soup! That’s become a tradition for the forage over the years, and it’s probably my favourite part after spending the whole day gathering plants in the chilly weather. 

Sawsbuck Sendoff - Every year in the fall, the Sawsbuck and Deerling herds that live in the area migrate towards the mountains for the winter. They come through the area in big herds, and this lasts usually 2 - 3 days. This started off as something unofficial, but the popularity of it led to us advertising it as a sendoff, where we all gather and watch the Sawsbuck and Deerling herds migrate. You can also help clearing their way with us if you want, it’s a volunteer operation and we repay you with food, but you basically just help us clear the way and set up food and water stations, plus you might see some early groups come through! Can’t go up to the herds for safety reasons, but watching them is quite beautiful, and very rewarding to see your hard work pay off when they eat the food you set out for them. 

WINTER

Into the Unknown - Named a bit dramatically, because we definitely know where we’re going, but winter’s event is cave exploring! This is the only time of year we open up some of the more restricted caves, and we take people deep into the caves to explore. We check them all out in advance, of course, to ensure safety, but this is the one and only opportunity a year to get into some of these caves and explore deeper into the mountain. This is another one I tend to lead, and it’s great fun, but it’s also got a lot of hands on deck and on standby just in case. A lot of prep goes into this one and honestly, it’s probably my favourite event to host! There’s hidden waterfalls, glittering caves, and this is the only way you’ll see some Pokemon like Noibats, Noiverns, and some elusive Ghost and Dark Types.

Winter Harvest - We do this one a few times throughout the winter. Winter Harvest is when we take what we’ve been growing in the Greenhouses and the public can come help us make food packages that we donate to Pokemon shelters, and to families in need. This one usually has a big turnout and it’s a great environment all around; just people helping each other and drinking hot chocolate. I participate every year, and help with the deliveries along with staff and volunteers. 

Besides those, we also host regular adoption events. People can come through anytime to see if they’d like to adopt any of the Pokemon we hold here, though we do have fairs on a regular basis to promote the facility’s adoption services. 

You can also find some courses here- we offer them to anybody looking to learn, no age limit (just a minimum; 16), but they can be very helpful when applying for certain lines of work. I also offer referrals and letters of recommendation as a professor, and the staff are also qualified to do the same as medical experts and behaviouralists.

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FAQ

Q: What kind of questions can I ask?

A: Anything and everything! I’ll always answer to the best of my ability, be it behaviour, medical, or just you wanting my thoughts on a certain species or concept. I’ll always be sure to be clear when my answers are uncertain, theoretical, or if I just don’t know. But anything you want to ask, ask away!

Q: Can I come to you for medical advice?

A: Within the Pokemon world? Absolutely! If you’re looking for real-life medical advice from the author of this blog, who is an arts student who works part-time retail, you are not going to find anything helpful!

Q: Why is my question taking a while to get answered?

A: I (both myself and Arthur) get very busy! I check this blog whenever I can, but I don’t always answer right away because my answers require time for me to sit down and think it out. I answer every ask I receive (unless it’s really weirdly personal or if there’s clearly something really bad about it- then it’ll be deleted) and I do so as quickly as I can, but I pride myself on quality answers, so it might take me a bit!

Q: Do you hand out starter Pokemon?

A: Not in the way you think! We do adopt Pokemon out, but we’re not like, say Professor Oak. Adopting a Pokemon out here, even to a child, involves a screening process of the adopter (anyone over 18 and if younger than 18, their legal guardian(s)), and a lot of paperwork. We have to make sure everything is going to work out, after all! But we don’t just hand a new trainer a Pokemon, no.

Q: Can I leave my Pokemon there for a short while?

A: Absolutely! We don’t have a designated daycare area, but we will ensure your Pokemon gets the best care and stays in the area best suited to them. Feel free to leave them with us, but we do ask that it not be long, so try to come get them within 10 days unless you give us notice it will be a longer period. While you’re away, your Pokemon will be allowed to roam (with supervision) in any area that best suits it, and I’ll personally assure you that staff are more than happy to keep our Pokemon guests company, haha :)

[llama-of-pangea]

COVID-19 myths to beware:

(last updated April 24, 2020; links to sources)

There is not yet a vaccine or official treatment for COVID-19, though work is in progress around the world.

The FDA briefly approved the drug chloroquine to treat COVID-19, but there is no hard evidence that this drug will actually work for treating this virus. The drug is no longer being studied as a treatment [source 1], as several people taking it daily for COVID-19 experienced heart problems and some died [source 2]. This drug is an anti-malarial that is sometimes used to treat autoimmune conditions such as lupus. There is one study suggesting it could inhibit COVID-19, but this study was small and had serious methodology concerns. ***4/24/2020 update: the study has since been retracted, due to lack of proper vetting and serious methodology issues.*** It’s not a reliable (or even safe) treatment for COVID-19; it might also create a life-threatening shortage for people who need this drug for other conditions. Do not take chloroquine unless it is prescribed to you by a doctor, and definitely do not self-administer this drug.

Injecting disinfectants will not help you, and may cause serious harm. Do not consume or inject disinfectants of any kind.

No, summer weather or living in a warm climate does not mean you’re safe from COVID-19. Likewise, winter weather does not kill COVID-19. In either climate, the virus lives in the human body, which is fairly consistent in temperature -- so, what the weather is like doesn’t affect it much.

On that note, the approach of summer will not inherently kill off the virus. It can live in hot, humid weather. Also, just because it’s no longer cold and flu season in the US doesn’t mean it’s not cold and flu season elsewhere (like in the southern hemisphere).

Also, no, trying to raise your body temperature (by taking a hot bath or by some other means) will not stop you from getting sick. Again, your internal body temperature changes very little, so this won’t help you. But washing your hands or showering after going out can! So do those instead!

No, 5G does not spread COVID-19. Viruses cannot travel on radio waves, and we’ve seen the virus spread in areas without 5G mobile networks. COVID-19 is spread through respiratory droplets (from talking, coughing, sneezing) or touching surfaces that have been exposed to these droplets.

No, you can’t protect yourself with a detox treatment, detox supplement, or detox “tea” of any kind (and shame on the influencers pushing this).

No, you cannot “self-test” for COVID-19 by holding your breath. The claim that you can self-test by attempting to hold your breath for 10 seconds is a social media hoax which gained traction when it was shared by Fox News. It has been completely debunked. Also, plenty of people who have COVID-19 are asymptomatic and can breathe normally.

Be skeptical of home tests. Produced primarily by Everlywell, they are expensive, and the chance for a false negative is very high (they require swabbing VERY far up your own nose, which is difficult to do on yourself if you’re not a medical professional or someone with experience doing this). If you’re worried that you may be sick, call your doctor; there are also lots of drive-in testing locations around the country.

Hand sanitizers made with only essential oils do not work -- essential oils do not disinfect. Beware of DIY hand sanitizer, as it is easy to make an ineffective one. Soap and water are the most effective means of disinfecting your hands. DO NOT consume essential oils unless it is specifically a food-grade product; most are not and are harmful if consumed.

It’s unclear if ibuprofen can worsen cases of COVID-19 -- this information was circulated by the French Health Minister, but there is no scientific data to support their claim. Ibuprofen is probably still safe to take. If you have any doubts, you can take Tylenol instead.

COVID-19 has nothing to do with beer or eating meat.

Beware of conspiracy theories in general.

Beware of phishing scams pretending to be official press releases. Many appear from fake CDC emails.

Facebook, Twitter, and other social media sites are struggling to stop misinformation campaigns. Don’t consider these sites a reliable source of information -- look for the primary source to confirm what you see online, and do what you can to report or remove false information.

Beware articles or sources that use the current situation to excuse discrimination or prejudice. It is wrong to blame Asians and Asian culture for COVID-19 -- that’s just racism. Similarly, stories blaming migrants are just as wrongly biased.

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How to determine if something is bullshit (a short guide): ask the following questions:

(1) Are there sources included with the statement? (2) Are the sources credible (namely, are they from a primary source, such as a research group, recognized health agency, or other medical institution)? (3) Can I find more than one account of the information? (4) Is the statement objective (meaning ‘based on fact’, rather than subjective or ‘based on emotion or feeling’, which creates a bias)?

If the answer to any of those 4 questions is “no”, there’s a chance the information could be bullshit, OR, at the very least, it may be incomplete.

In health news, be skeptical of things involving very small test groups (a test on 12 people does not speak for the general public!) or that never went to human testing (things work differently in petri dishes than in our bodies). Also be skeptical of things made by for-profit laboratories. Big pharma can make great things, but it can also be misleading or skewed. Read the literature from sources that are not invested in the product (again -- the CDC, WHO, and FDA are good places to start) to get a better sense of how reliable, safe, or effective a thing is.

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Check out the CDC’s list of COVID-19 myths here: https://www.who.int/emergencies/diseases/novel-coronavirus-2019/advice-for-public/myth-busters

*** Note: I’m not a doctor or any other type of medical professional. I am a geologist who knows a lot about source evaluation and is worried about people being misinformed