#I actually don't care about Jaune

[lesbianneopolitan]

I love the way you draw Jaune so so much

Big tiddy himbo supreme, my beautiful boy

Thank you for your service

golden retriever himbo Jaune that is beefy, as he should BE

[timeturner-jay]

How about 'joy' for Jaune? 🐝🎨

There is colour in the world, she thinks. Not in the way that the sky is blue, or the grass is green – those are colours too of course, but when she paints, her passion becomes pigment and her emotions a hue. Vi rolls her eyes fondly and says that she’s making things too complicated, but what could be easier than this?

Jaune takes her brush and paints her emotions as they come; her pride a valiant blue, her anger a seething green, her sorrow a capricious red. And her joy, her joy the bright sunshine yellow she was named for.

Your prompt rang true, because this was definitely a joy to write! <3 I hope it's a joy to read, too!

[juanarc-thethird]

Animal control with jaune and Blake

I don't know if what I wrote below was what you expected, but what's done is done. ------------

Animal Control

Jaune and Blake drive in their van to their first client.

Jaune: *Driving* So, what kind of job do we have today?

Blake: We have to appease a crocodile.

Jaune: Is it a "catch and release" type of job?

Blake: No, they just need us to relax her.

Jaune: Oh, I see, it's their pet.

Blake: *Quietly* I wouldn't say that.

Jaune: What's her name? The crocodile, I mean.

Blake: Tock

Jaune: Ok, first time I've heard a name like that.

Blake: Make a left here and the house will be on the right.

Jaune: Thanks

Jaune follows Blake's directions and they stop in front of the house.

Jaune: Here we are. I'll go take some tranquilizer darts.

Blake: It won't be necessary.

Jaune: Really? Is a crocodile.

Blake: Trust me, you won't need it.

Jaune: If you say so

They get out of the van, walk to the door and ring the doorbell.

Jaune: After these, do you want to stop and eat at the taqueria I told you about yesterday?

Blake: Sure, if we have time.

Jaune: Great.

Suddenly the door of the house opens. In front of them 5 very scared people appear and start talking at the same time.

Jaune: Wow! Quiet! Don't worry… As you can see, we are animal control and we are already informed of what is happening. You.. *he points to one of the people* ..where is the crocodile?

Stranger 1: T-That way.

He says as he points to a door at the end of the hallway.

Stranger 1: She's in there. Please be very careful.

Jaune: *Smiles* Don't worry, we are professionals.

He says with great confidence.

Stranger 2: If you survive, we will follow you to the depths of hell.

Jaune: (Holy cow, what kind of crocodile do they have?!) T-That's not necessary.

Blake: Jaune, lets go.

Jaune: R-Right.

The two pass between the people towards their objective. The more they do it, the more they hear the chaos happening inside the room.

Jaune: So, how do you plan to appease her?

Blake: By using you.

Jaune: *Surprise* I'm sorry!

Blake grabs the door handle and opens it without any worry.

Jaune: Wait!

When they open the door completely, they find a very upset woman.

Tock: How the hell did I lose that money?!! That bet was supposedly a sure winner!!! *She grabs a chair and throws it against the wall* AAAAH!!!!

Jaune: Blake...

Blake: Hm?

Jaune: That's not a crocodile

Blake: Wrong, she is.

Jaune: She is a person!

Blake: Correction, She is a Crocodile Faunus person.

Jaune: That doesn't matter, you told me that we would work with animals!

Blake: She is an animal.

Jaune: *Gasp!* Now that's racist.

Blake: Ok I lied! Actually this companionship business for women.

Jaune: And I'm the product?

Blake: Y-Yes... *Ashamed, she lowers her head*

Jaune: *Sighs* Look Blake, if you need money, I can help you.

Blake: *Happy* So you'll work for me?!

Jaune: Hell no! I leav-!

Tock: *Grabs his shirt* You finally arrived handsome.

Jaune: *Worry* Hey wait a minute! I was just leav-!

Tock: Enough of the talk, let's fuck!

She pushes Jaune into the room and locks the door. Blake puts her ear to the door and listens.

Jaune: Wait this is all a misunderstanding! If you let me explain-!

Suddenly the sound of clothes falling is heard.

Jaune: O-Oh God~

Tock: You like what you see, big guy~💕 This is all yours for the next hour~

Jaune: I-I don't think it's a good idea-

Tock: If you're worried about my teeth, don't be. I don't bite…hard~

Jaune: Is not that, the thing is...

Then the sound of a zipper is heard.

Jaune: H-Hey!

Tock: Holy fuck~💕 They told me you were big, but I didn't expect such a massive cock~ God, I need it inside me~💕

Jaune: H-Hang on a minute! I don't think she will fit! Hey! WAIT!

The sound of skin slapping skin echoed through the room.

Tock: MoThErfuCkEr!!💕

Jaune: *Worry* Are you ok?!

Tock: I'm fine! Just… fuck~💕… I think I just came. Shit, you sure have a nice cock~ I will definitely book you again. Now let's test your stamina~💕

Jaune: Mu stami-*Gets kissed*-MHH!!💕

Tock: Shut up now, will you, just fuck me~💕 *Kiss* *Kiss* *Kiss*

Blake: (Looks like my plan was a success)

Blake walks away from the door and starts typing on her phone.

Blake(text): I have a space open this Saturday, is that okay?

*Ting!*

White_Queen: I take it. It would be at my beach house. I'll send you the address later, along with the deposit.

Blake smiles at the text

Blake: (Oh Jaune~ You don't know how valuable you are.)

[howi99]

Forever fall accident

Nora: *looking at the sap from the tree slowly filling her jar* Soon, soon you will be mine~

Ren: *sigh* Nora, the sap is not for you. It's for the professors. Please don't drink another jar... Again.

Nora: *cheekily* I can't promise~

Pyrrha: *looking around* Did anyone see Jaune?

Nora: *looking up to Pyrrha* Maybe the call of nature got the best of him?

Ren: *sigh even louder* Nora, i don't think Jaune would just leave without saying a word just to go to the bathroom.

Pyrrha: He probably was lost in his own head. He does that a lot, we should try finding him.

______________

Jaune: *looking at team CRDL* Now that i helped you with getting more sap, do you need anything else?

Cardin: *smiling* Jauney boy, you've been such a good help today. So much so that me and my team decided to finally move on from you.

Jaune: ... What do you mean?

Cardin: *taking one of the jar* See, whatever we do to you, you seem to not mind. And frankly, it's booooriiiiing. So, instead of trying to get a reaction from you, we thought "what if we tried on someone else?"

Jaune: ...

Cardin: Now, we both know how much of a pushover you are, soooo *put the jar back in Jaune's hand* We want YOU to throw that bottle at Pyrrha.

Jaune: ... Excuse me?

Sky: *with a box in his hands* We got a rapier wasp nest, and they love sap!

Cardin: *spitting on the ground* She keeps beating us up because we are a bit rowdy with you. And we want to teach her a lesson. And you *poke Jaune chest* will help us.

Jaune: ... *Sigh* Cardin, i give you 10 seconds after I finish speaking to reconsider your actions.

Cardin: *laugh* You think you can threaten me? We all saw how bad you were during practice.

The jar breaks in Jaune's hand

Jaune: *coldly staring at cardin* The only reason i don't do well in class is because if i actually tried, i might kill people. Now, i will ask you again to rethink your decision, Cardin.

Cardin: *a bit less sure* You might be good at bluffing, but i still know that you wouldn't be able to fight the 4 of us by yourself! I- *get punch in the guts. Then, while trying to catch his breath, Jaune caught him by the throat* Ack!

Dove, Sky and Russel: *ready their weapons*

Jaune: 10 seconds. *Sigh* i let you walk all over me, pushed me and sent me into dangerous situations but i didn't care because you weren't trying to hurt anyone that was important, just me. *Bringing Cardin to eye level, not even flinching when Cardin desperately tried to punch him to get released* But you had to try going for the ones that matter. Now this is your last warning Cardin; Forget your plan, and i won't break your neck like a twig. *Jaune's grip tightens even more, breaking Cardin aura*

Sky: *screaming* URSA! WE GOT URSA!

Jaune: *finally look around him, seeing the Ursa's encircling the group* Hm... *Release Cardin* Get out. All of you.

Dove: H-how!? There's no exit!

Jaune: *smiling* You make yourself a path. *Goes in front of one of the Ursa* Like this! *Use his spear to behead the ursa in one swing*

Sky and Russel: *help Cardin getting back up*

Dove: *looking at Jaune smiling after killing the grimm* You freak...

Jaune: *turning to Dove* Yes, i am.

___________

Pyrrha: Jaune! Where are you!

Nora: Fearless leader, we got sap for your dessert! We know you love making them!

Ren: ... Nora, i highly doubt he will-

Jaune: *coming out from the trees* More sap? Nice, my jars are broken!

Pyrrha: Jaune! *Goes to him* Thanks the gods you are okay and- *look at the broken lance* What happened!?

Jaune: Oh, you know, a little grimm ambush. *Smile* Nothing to worry about.

Ren: We were supposed to tell Glynda for any sighting of grimm.

Jaune: Don't worry, their's none left. *Turning to Nora* And you won't need to break Cardin's legs, i don't think he will try anything else against us.

Nora: Ohoh!~ You kicked his ass?

Jaune: *scratching the back of his head* Not necessarily. But i don't think he will want to try anything else.

________

Team RWBY is walking back to the bullhead

Yang: ... He was laughing.

Blake: ... Yeah.

Weiss: he dismembered those grimm like if they were made out of paper.

Ruby: *sigh* and the way he talked to Cardin...

Blake: Can't say he hadn't it coming.

Yang: ...

Ruby: *looking at Yang* Hey, i know what it looks like, but i'm sure we can talk with him about it, right?

Yang: *sigh* Yeah... Probably.

[howlingday]

Panthera Tigris Tigris Nikos

Jaune: Hey, Pyrrha? Can I have a hug?

Pyrrha: Of course, Jaune! (Hugs)

Jaune: (Sinks into her)

Pyrrha: Would anyone else like-

Nora: (Dragging Ren) MEMEMEME~!

Fun Fact! Bengal tigers are big. Females have been documented to reach 400 pounds, males 500 pounds, and occasionally larger specimens reaching 700 pounds. Royal Bengal Tigers are reportedly even bigger, with one specimen shot by David Hasinger in 1967 was reported to be 857 pounds, measured at 11 feet long, and left paw prints "the size of dinner plates," and it's last meal was a live water buffalo weighed down by an eighty-pound weight. It is displayed in the Smithsonian Institutions's National Museum of Natural History, in the Hall of Mammals.

---------------------------------------------------

Pyrrha: Ready for our run, Jaune?

Jaune: You bet! Maybe this time I could-

Pyrrha: (Ear flicks) Oh, uh, why don't you keep warming up, Jaune? I need to grab something from the dorm.

Jaune: Oh, uh, sure thing, Pyrrha. I'll be right here.

Cardin: (Sitting on the roof) What the hell? Where's Nikos go- (Door swings open, Mauled)

Fun Fact! Bengal Tigers are fast. They can make short sprints of forty miles per hour, which is about the speed of a thoroughbred horse. An incident with a startled tigress mother with her cubs in Nepal in 1974 resulted in the death of a researcher who was hiding 15 feet in a tree. In 2007, on Christmas Day at the San Francisco Zoo, an Amur Tiger cleared a thirty-foot moat to maul three visitors who were harassing the tiger, killing one of them before being killed after four shots to the skull by responding police officer's .40-caliber-pistol rounds. It should be noted that the Amur was a captive tiger, raised from birth in the zoo. Imagine a wild tiger raised in the jungle.

---------------------------------------------------

Pyrrha: Are you okay, Jaune?

Jaune: Y-Yeah, I... Wait, what about the goliath?!

Pyrrha: It's okay, Jaune. I took care of it.

Jaune: But how, Pyrrha? (Holding) Your weapons-!

Pyrrha: (Takes, Smiles) I took care of it.

Jaune: (Looks behind her, Sees dead goliath)

Fun Fact! Bengal Tigers are strong. Their bite force can reach up to a thousand pounds, which is much stronger than a pitbull's and about a quarter of a great white shark. Their prey includes deer, buffalo, bison, bears, rhinos, and elephants. A single blow can break a bear's spine, and easily decapitate a human.

---------------------------------------------------

Jaune: Thanks again for letting us come visit, Mrs. Nikos.

Mama Nikos: Oh, Jaune, don't be so formal. We're practically family, so just call me Mama.

Jaune: Uh... No, I'll just stick with Mrs. Nikos, if you don't mind.

Mama Nikos: Oh, you are just so polite! I'm glad Pyrrha could have such a handsome team leader like you.

Pyrrha: (Blushing) M-Mom...

Nora: Can I have more meat buns, Mama?

Ren: Nora...

Nora: Oh, right! Khm! May I have more meat buns, Mama?

Mama Nikos: They're in the oven.

Jaune: So what do you do for a living, Mrs. Nikos?

Mama Nikos: I'm a personal fitness trainer. It's actually how I met Pyrrha's father. He said he could perform a perfect double twister kick, and I told him it was impossible unless he could twist and launch himself at a 167 degree rotation with a north-northwest gale blowing at 3.5 miles per hour behind him-

Mama Nikos: (Ding!) Oh! Meat buns are done!

Jaune: Huh...

Pyrrha: Don't worry. I didn't get it the first time, either.

Fun Fact! Bengal tigers are smart. Cubs are raised by their mothers for two and a half to three years. There are also notes of tigers imitating deer and bear calls. They will chase larger prey into water, tear at buffalo legs to bring them to the ground, and will flip porcupines from to their backs to avoid spines. There are also records of tigers killing 15-foot crocodiles, 20-foot pythons, 300-pound seals, and a 20-year-old elephant.

---------------------------------------------------

Jaune: Hm? Hey, Pyrrha? Who's this standing with your mom?

Pyrrha: Hm? Oh... That's... That's my mother. She... She's not around anymore.

Jaune: Do... Do you want to talk about it?

Pyrrha: I... I don't know where to begin. She was my hero, but she did something really bad, and she died when I was really young. And I...

Jaune: Hey. You don't have to tell me if you don't want to.

Pyrrha: (Leans on Jaune) I was probably six years old when it happened. She and I were on our way to watch a tournament together, but then this guy came from out of nowhere. He shot at us and broke her jaw. She carried me back home, and then... She left that night. I didn't learn about what happened to her until just after getting accepted into Beacon. She... She went on a rampage and then... Then she...

Jaune: (Holds her) Hey, hey. It's okay, Pyrrha. I'm... I'm sorry to hear that. I'm... I'm sure she was a great mom.

Pyrrha: (Sniffles) She was the best. And, on the bright side, because of her, there's a new standard for huntsman and huntresses to follow. And she's part of the reason why I became a huntress. So I could make sure everyone follows the standard. Follows the example she set. (Smiles) I think she would have liked you.

Jaune: (Looks at family photo) I think I would have like her, too.

Fun Fact! In the first ten years of the 20th century, until her death in 1907, the Champawat Tiger, also known as "the man-eater" killed and ate 436 humans in western Nepal. She evaded capture and continued to kill until she was shot by British hunter Jim Corbett, who speculated the tigress lost her teeth years ago from a gunshot, forcing her to change her prey to much easier humans. He then went on to be an advocate for wild tigers and spent the latter years of his life devoted to their conservation, even having a conservation park in Nepal dedicated to him.

[spahhzy]

Ruby: Give up Cinder, it's over...

Team RWBY currently had chased down an injured Cinder, who has made her escape through the sandy streets of Vacuo

Cinder when she heard that just began to laugh.

Team RWBY looked at each other before suddenly a door could be heard, and boots echoed loudly against the chapel floor as a mop of blonde hair and narrow blue eyes stalked toward Cinder.

Weiss: Jaune....

Jaune paid her no heed, just marched at Cinder with a purpose.

Cinder, holding her injured human arm, continued laughing as Jaune.

Cinder: Oh Jaune~

Jaune said nothing continued his pace and finally met Cinder at the altar.

Cinder: What a night~

Jaune just grabbed Cinder with both hands and lifted her up by the hems of her shirt. She was dangling in the air.

Cinder: Fresh off a kill, and back for more, eh?

Jaune: Penny still alive.

Ruby felt relief wash over her as Cinder looked on in disbelief.

Cinder: Now that's not funny...

Cinder used her grim hand to suddenly rip away from Jaune's grip before manifesting a glass blade and swipe at him only for Jaune to block it with his own.

Team RWBY looked to want to help, but Jaune's glare at them said to 'stay out of this'.

Cinder: All this-all this rage! All directed at me, and for what!? You know, if you actually let me finish a sentence, you might learn something! You might learn that we're not so different... you might learn something about yourself!

Jaune: You need to learn to shut up.

Cinder: You know it's sad, really...it's like you don't care to see the good side in me... I mean, you did it for Neo... maybe I should try to kill her next, hmm?~

Enraged even further, Jaune quickly swiped at Cinders glass blade before raising a foot, which connected roughly against Cinders chest, sending her crashing into the pews as Team RWBY looked on in worry.

Cinder just laughed, slowly getting up.

Cinder: Is all this for you or for me? You must know that I'm a lost cause. Oh, but Jauney, I have hopes for you~yes, I got great hopes for you...

Cinder wagging a finger at him.

Cinder: Come on, Arc, don't stop now, WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR!?

Jaune just grabbed Cinder again and tossed her into one of the stain glass windows, shattering it as her body fell to the floor, but still Cinder wasn't down for the count even as her aura shimmered.

Cinder grabbed two shards of glass as she saw Jaune make her way to her.

Cinder: You just can't get it through your thick skull!

Jaune stopped walking as he looked at the broken Crocea Mors before deciding to ultimately sheath it and looking at his gloved hands... before he removed his gloves, too, giving them a nice pop before resuming his walk towards Cinder, who had just risen up holding the two shards of glass tightly in her head.

Cinder: WE BOTH EXIST BECAUSE OF THEM!

Jaune: Give up! You've lost!

Cinder attempted to swipe at with one of the shards of glass, but he was able to easily grab her hand and delivered a shot to the bottom right side of her body, causing her to drop one of the shards of glass.

Cinder just giggled maniacally through the pain as she attempted to swipe at him with the other hand, but Jaune side stepped it and delivered a quick jab to her face, causing her to drop the remaining shard as her aura flickered.

Jaune just delivered three more body strikes to Cinder, who just took it before Jaune landed a thunderous haymaker to Cinder chin, sending her atop the altar.

Team RWBY still looked unsure of how this was going to go, as they wanted to incapacitate and lock down Cinder to get her maiden powers transferred from Ozpin old machine...but if Jaune was going to kill her than...she could very well give the powers to whoever she thinks of...

Cinder: Aww, Jauney, your time away from me has been so worth it~

Jaune says nothing as he struck Cinder across the face again.

Cinder: ooooh~ that's why you do it. You did the same with Tyrian... you like the way it feels...it's what you need!

Jaune just delivered another strike to Cinder face before grabbing her midsection and lifting her up with his strength, Cinder just dangled helplessly, all with a smile on her face as Jaune threw her to the ground hard.

The force of the slam cause Cinders aura to finally shatter, but Cinder didn't care as she scrambled to sit up.

Cinder: Come on, baby~ beat me till your knuckles bleed, but why stop their? You know theirs only one way to stop me! Come on Jaune Come on ki-

Before she could get a word out, a mechanicle hand punched her in the face, effectively knocking her out.

Jaune just huffed in and out as his anger began to simmer down.

Yang: I think she's talked enough.

Jaune just said nothing as he looked at Cinders unconscious body.

Ruby slowly walked up to her friend.

Ruby: Jaune... did you mean it? Did you mean it when you said Penny was okay?

Jaune slowly looked at Ruby before nodding as he suddenly felt Ruby hug him tightly.

Ruby: Thank you thank you thank you thank you thank!

Jaune was able to gently pry away from Ruby's grip as Yang hoisted up the fall maiden on her shoulders, Blake walked up to him.

Blake: Are you going to be okay?

Jaune just nodded, and Blake gave him a look over, not entirely convinced after seeing that display.

Jaune: I'll be fine, Blake...I promise. go your leader is just about to burst joy.

Blake said nothing but nodded as she followed her team leader and partner.

Jaune took one more glance at Cinder before leaving without a word.

Weiss watched briefly as he disappeared into a gathering crowd.

[palaceofpassion]

The life of a House Husband

"Uhm... are you sure that I'm needed for this sir?" Jaune Arc was many things, he was a young awkward man, he was also the only boy in a household of eight women. Something that had a rather grand affect on his life, from cooking to cleaning, he could do every household task with ease. Something that had come akin to his mother wanting everyone to chip in.

And of course, being under the thumbs of his sisters. Whether it was through brute force, or being unable to say no. So... when he received a call from Headmaster Ozpin, of Beacon Academy, that he had a job for him, he was a little shocked.

"Yes, Glynda has informed me that you're quite skilled at helping others."

His cheeks felt flushed as he stared at the elderly man. "I mean, my semblance is good at helping bring out positive emotions but... I wouldn't really say I'm good at helping others." That was a lie, and he sort of wondered what his Auntie Glynda had told him. Glynda being his late father's sister of course.

"Mmhmm, she has spoken quite highly of you."

Now he was just embarrassed, "Oh. Well, that's honors." She was very brutal about the truth, even to family. "But I don't see why that means anything here."

"Well you see." Ozpin put a photo on his desk, ushering Jaune to pick it up. To which he did of course, the image had four young women. Ordered from tallest to shortest. Though he did note that three of them were quite short when compared to the tall redhead, who appeared to rival even him in height. "These four young women are some of our, if not the most promising huntresses this year... except."

"Except what sir?" He was a little confused, a bit embarrassed, if they were important and famous, he should know them... but he was kind of just a country bumpkin.

"Except that they would be unable to take care of themselves if left to their own devices. " Ozpin seemed frustrated by the statement, grabbing a cup of coffee to take a deep sip before continuing, "You see Mr. Arc. These four are the hope of Beacon, and while I would love for them to succeed, they have... problems. Ms. Cruz." He pointed at one of the shorter girls... actually THE shortest. With soft green hair, and dazzling emerald eyes. "She has unfortunately had... issues with the loss of her past team, so it's hard for her to open up to others, and she lacks self confidence in herself. And while the most calculating mind on her team, and their leader... it's doubtful whether she'll be able to communicate with the other three." He next pointed at the next shortest girl, with snow white hair, and frosty blue eyes, "Ms. Schnee is... strong willed, to say the least. She's grown in an environment that was about being used or to use others. As such, she'll be abrasive to the others, she also has very little experience with chores or taking care of herself, or so her mother has informed me."

Next was the maroon haired woman, with a stoutly figure, and pretty grey eyes, "This is May Zedong. She's similar to Ms. Cruz, but whereas Ms. Cruz has fears of being around others. May chooses not to involve herself, she's also had a hard time. Apparently she's had issues with both male and female students in the past. And likes to keep to herself. She's also quite soft spoken."

"And finally, this." He pointed out the dazzling red haired woman, with shining green eyes. "Is Pyrrha Nikos, she is, the strongest member of their team. However, she lacks the will to lead. She would rather not ruffle any feathers, and takes on an overtly polite persona when around other people. She's also quite famous, so it's not strange for people to come to her with ulterior motives. She's not quick to let people in, especially when she feels they'll be coming for her name. Unfortunately Ms. Schnee has already seemed to get on her bad side, and whether they'll work together at this point is impossible to tell."

There was obvious frustration in his voice, "Unfortunately, while each are all incredibly skilled huntresses, they haven't put much time, nor want, into self care. And that's where you come in." "So... you want me to be a nanny?" "Something to that effect, though you'll also be providing them with a shoulder to stand on." He wanted to say something, but as the most normal sibling, amongst a cavalcade of spectacular and amazing sisters. He sort of knew his position, and knew where people with talent tended to lie. Their single minded pursuit on improvement and being the bet. Especially if they have mental or emotional hang ups... he hated to admit it. But his semblance would definitely help. But more than that, as he listened to their stories, he wanted to help. "Okay." He would do what he could to help ease their lives, and besides... while he never wanted to be a huntsman. It would be interesting to see what kind of lives they lived.

While eyeing the image, he started to try to work things out. He didn't know their backstories, but one was afraid that she would see others die, or that she would be the cause. One is afraid of letting others in, because she's lived in a harsh environment, one is unable to communicate her feelings with others, used to being ignored... or something happened between her and a past team. And one has learned to close her heart, an actress if you will... He took a deep breath and sighed, "Okay, I suppose I should go meet them." "Mmhmm, they've already been informed of your... inclusion." He nodded, hopefully things wouldn't be too bad. But as he held the photo, he couldn't help but worry.

[reashot]

Of Jaune and Men.

Ruby: Oh Jaune I wuv you. ☺

Jaune: *gasp* really?

Ruby: Fo'sho. Your tall, handsome, kind and your dick is also huge. 🤤

Jaune: Wow I don't know you think so highly of me Ruby.

Ruby: And there's nothing you can say that will make me think any less of you. 🤭

Jaune: Oh I wuv... Well I guess should tell you something about me you didn't know.

Ruby: Oh, I think I know everything about you. Mr. I still wet my bed in middle school. 😋

Jaune: No it's about something else... Ruby. I actually don't like gun.

Ruby: *record scratch*

What?

Tell me it isn't so... 😢

Jaune: Yeah. It's true. I never care for the thing. I prefer to use sword. Why do you think I never got a gun after all these years.

Ruby: .... 😶

Jaune: Uh, Ruby you okay there?

Ruby: Oh Jaune can you wait here please. I'm just going back to get something. And please don't look back. 🙁

Jaune: Oh okay...

*looks at the beautiful lake in front of him while he waits for Ruby*

Ruby: I'm back Jaune. Please don't look back to me yet. I want to surprise you. 😞

Jaune: Oh. Okay. So what is it about Ruby?

Ruby: *loads a shell*

*sniffs*

It's nothing. Jaune, just tell me something else right now like tell me about your day... 😣

Jaune: Well I've been thinking Ruby. Now that we're a thing. How about later we go and meet my family. I'm sure my sisters and mom would love to meet you. My dad would probably be displeased with me because he promised me to someone else.

But I will tell him that this is the girl I want to spend my life with.

Ruby: *starts crying* 😭

*cocking sounds*

I'm sorry Jaune, I'm so sorry...

So dear viewer what should happens next?

Leave a comment and I will post the next story in 1 of the 9days of Lancaster fic.

[rachetmath]

Why RWBY Ain't MC?

(Okay if you already seen this ('Jaune More MC Ruby? 'https://rachetmath.tumblr.com/post/744057722669039616/jaune-more-mc-ruby) Then you should know where this is going.)

Jaune: And that's what is wrong with your characters.

RWBY: *shocked* 

Ruby: Oh crap.

Weiss: Oh God…

Blake: My people…

Yang: I am a basic bitch?

Jaune: Yeah you girl's characters are all over the place. Not just that… you have so much screen time yet do nothing with it. You're basically side characters to your own stories. 

Yang: Not true.

Jaune: Yes true. Look let's start with Ruby.

Ruby: Me?

Jaune: Yeah, because some of my character issues should have been yours, like killing Penny for example. Considering that was suitable punishment for what you have done. You lied to James. You drove him off the rails. You and your team made the mess. 

Ruby: Um…

Jaune: But that's too easy. Let's really go down the shit hole. Ruby, you have silver eyes. Yet you barely use them. You never trained with them. We still know nothing about them. And we don’t know if they’ll work on Salem.

Ruby: um…

Jaune: And you know that would have been answered back at Atlas if you went on the battlefield. Speaking of Salem, why the hell would you put Ironwood someone more of my problem than Salem, if I recall knows who your mom is.

Ruby: Well I had to protect Penny.

Jaune: Mhmm. Okay. Speaking of your mom what did you learn about her in The Ever After?

Ruby: Um-

Jaune: Not much. Yeah. And again no villain besides Cinder and Neo were interested in you. Not even you are interested in them considering you barely remember them. Like Ruby, you don't do anything. Like you fast but slow in the head. Hell even Neo ganging up on you, you still didn't deserve it. I actually deserved it.

Ruby: How?

Jaune: Again Pyrrha died. Ozpin died. All because of me. And even if you killed Penny it's still going to feel like my fault because I could've prevented it.

Ruby: Oh no. 

Weiss: Jaune-

Jaune: Nope. Your turn. You are worse than your father.

Weiss: I-

Jaune: You talk about how your father does business but you don’t do business. Nor do you know how to run a business.

Weiss: I mean-

Jaune: You lied to your sister’s face. Your sister who trained you and made sure you were able to leave Atlas. You got Klien fired. You threatened your own brother.

Weiss: Um-. I-i

Jaune: Oh let’s not forget how you destroyed your home and now your family is broke.

Weiss: Well at least I’m a good teammate.

Jaune: Didn’t you almost divide your team about two times? Also, how is everyone insulting me when you barely win your fights?

Weiss: Not true.

Jaune: Flynt Coal.

Weiss: Luck.

Jaune: Vernal.

Weiss: I was rusty.

Jaune: More like spamming.

Weiss: We defeated the Ace-ops.

Jaune: Neo and Cinder. The ones who were supposed to be on the same level as them. Did you win?

Weiss: Shit.

Jaune: You know what I should mention this. In Argus, I must have been under some stress or high as a kite, because now that I think about it, the deal Cordoven gave us, wasn’t that bad.

Weiss: Jaune she was planning to send me back to my father.

Jaune: Alright, then instead of accepting those terms and going to face your father, basically lying claim to your life, you cowardly avoided him and let your friends be what scares him. Not you. In fact, you were willing to endanger yourself and thousands of people to avoid him.

Weiss: … … ….

Jaune: Look I understand you don’t have to face everything alone. But there are some moments you have to deal with alone. Instead of having to escape your father like last time, you could have returned, stood up to him, and left out the front door from which you came in. Why? Because that’s how much you care about your friends and your freedom that you won’t let anybody, especially a man you can easily crush into ground beef take from you.

Weiss: By god. I am my father. 

Jaune: Yeah. Blake.

Blake: *looks at him*

Jaune: Blake, I would be concerned for my people if I were you.

Blake: Why?

Jaune: Well-

Me: Nope. Nope. I’ll explain. Blake, you remember the hound right?

Blake: Yeah.

Blake: A silver-eyed person.

Me: Look at his head.

Blake: “Look at his head”? I mean I see- oh. Oh my god.

Me: Yeah. A faunus. People who have animal-like features.  Again with silver eyes, we know nothing. But Faunuses on the other hand, we know where this could lead to.

Blake: Oh no.

Me: And you single-handedly divided the White Fang. And if hunters or people start siding with Salem, what does that mean for the Faunuses who are now venerable because of you?

Blake: Oh GOD! What have I done?!

Me: I mean I started questioning whether you cared about your people or not. Considering you didn’t bother staying in Mantle to protect them. You trust a criminal more than an official officer or hunter. Even though Robyn was doing the same crap Adam and Roman were doing. Good job.

Blake: *crying*

Me: Now for you.

Yang: Me?

Me: Yes. I never thought I come back for your ass. But here we are. Now then, what the fuck did Raven tell you to do?

Yang: Um.

Me: The same thing your father was telling you to do. Think. Don’t just follow orders. Don’t just act. Think! 

Yang: I did but-

Me: You didn’t think it through.

Yang: Look trusting Robyn-

Me: When you confronted Robyn what was your plan afterwards?

Yang: Um-

Me: Remember you didn’t tell her everything so she was still skeptical. She was tearing James a new one. So what was the point?!

Yang: Um-

Me: I mean, how were you going to chop Ruby off when ultimately you are more at fault than she is?

Yang: Um.

Me: Like at least Ruby was trying to lower the tension. You as per-fucking-usual added way more fuel to an already heated fire.

Yang: Well-

Me: I already mentioned how you are the biggest hypocrite, a simp and horrible sister. Now I might as well say you are the weakest link in your team– no, your squad.  

Yang: Hey-

Me: You've been losing fights.

Yang: Name-

Me: Mercury.

Yang: I beat him.

Jaune: Wasn’t that part of the plan to set you up though?

Yang: Yeah but-

Me: Round two, what happened then?

Yang: They double-teamed me.

Me: Before that you couldn’t land hit on him.

Yang: … … Adam.

Me: 2 v 1. He wasn’t even at his best. Bro was in his feelings.

Yang: The Ace-ops-

Me: Marrow, for one, could’ve ended that fight before it started. Second weren’t they arguing half the battle? Also didn’t Elm have your partner and for “reasons” she decided to let Blake go? Selling the match.

Yang: A win is a win.

Me: Okay Salem. Did you stand your ground and fight?

Yang: Um. Tactical retreat?

Me: She wasn’t even putting in effort. The cat.

Yang: I mean-

Me: Kilgore.

Yang: He does not count.

Me: Neo and Cinder. Again, on Ace-op level.

Yang: Come on, man, she-

Me: A win is a win right? So if you get a ring out or fall that is not victory. Neo won. Two to Zero.

Yang: … … …

Me: Raven… Raven trusted the lamp to you. Not Ruby. You! And you just… you just lost it like that. You fumbled- you fumbled so bad. And what’s crazy is I mentioned how you searched for the deadbeat instead of your “real mom” but it seems Raven is a better mom than Summer now. How? Not only is she alive. She knows what happened to Summer. And she saved your ass so many times. Three times.

Yang: Not-

Me: The train. Your first defeat.

Yang: … ….

Me: I’m not going to count Adam. But she let you leave her tribe camp alive, with your friend no less, knowing full well she didn’t have to help you especially when you came to her and was ready to fight when she wouldn’t give you what you wanted.

Yang: …. …. 

Me: And she let you walk with the relic. She could’ve killed you two times. But she didn’t. Why? Because whether she likes it or not, you are her DAUGHTER! And she LOVES you! 

Yang: Um…

Me: I hope- I hope Raven puts her hands on you because you earned the most savage ass whipping alive.  You basic bitch.

Yang: *shocked*

Me: Anyways y'all had plenty of opportunities to make your characters good. You all were given a good amount of screen time, however, the writers don't allow you to face your problems, shield you from consequences, and try so hard to prove you are always in the right all the time that you all might as well be Mary Sue. The worst kind of Mary Sue. The do no wrong type of Mary Sue.

Jaune: Damn. 

Me: Jaune, bro, I hope you survive this cause I still stand by this the writers did you dirty man. You didn't deserve that man. You didn't- you didn't deserve that. You and your team deserve better. 

[dragonotaku-justineverything]

(NSFW) So what does Jaune do with Pyrrha when it comes to lovemaking if he does, does he do risky things or keeps it simple for her?

Jaune sat in a seat behind one of the curved, several rows of tiered desks in a Beacon classroom as he answered in a whisper, "For 'lovemaking', I usually k-keep things simple. I don't need much to get going, Pyrrha's beautiful enough for me to always be ready. B-buuuuut as for doing riskier things during sex, Pyrrha does like to try new things now and then. She's s-surprisingly kinky, sort of like Blake, but actually able to keep it a secret. She's usually the one to suggest doing certain... t-things. R-right Pyrrha?"

Jaune leaned back in his seat, a seat that was in the very back upper corner of the classroom, where Professor Port was yammering on and on about another story of his. This was not Jaune's usual seat, but few people seemed to notice or care. The reason for this changed location was revealed when Jaune looked under the desk.

Pyrrha Nikos was under there, on her knees in her student uniform and her red sash wrapped around her eyes as a blindfold and ear plugs in. All while Jaune's hand was gripping the base of her ponytail and pulling her up and down his cock. His whole shaft was getting pushed into her mouth and throat, her lips meeting Jaune's pelvis, only to then be pulled back. Her hands were resting on his thighs and steadying herself. Despite how it looked though, Pyrrha was the eager one. Jaune really wasn't pulling her back down on his cock more so than just guiding her. He was making sure she was going at a steady pace so she didn't make too much noise from gagging.

But when he addressed her, he did pull her far enough that his cock was free for a few seconds, only for the blindfolded and deafened champion to only drawl out a single word of "moooouuure" before she began to search for his dick with her mouth.

Jaune gladly helped her and subtly guided her head back to his cock and they proceeded to continue their fun. Only now Pyrrha was much more fervent in her sucking, gripping Jaune's thighs hard and pulling him closer to her and also closer to the desktop. Jaune was also feeling more confident, having seen no one notice the noise they'd made so far.

So now more confident and feeling Pyrrha's vigorous bobbing on his dick, Jaune tightened his grip on her ponytail and began fucking her mouth on his cock. The slightest thrusts up with his hips met with him pushing her head down on his cock and he didn't pause at all. Jaune began to simply use Pyrrha's mouth and throat.

Which is exactly what Pyrrha had been hoping for when she suggested this. Under her sash blindfold, Pyrrha's eyes rolled up as her mouth was used to please her boyfriend. All she needed to do was suck and keep her lips wrapped around Jaune's hard dick.

And she was exceptional at doing just that~.

Jaune definitely thought so. She only had to do those two things for another minute or so before Jaune came down her throat. The first half hour of class with Pyrrha blowing him had built him up so much that the more vigorous face fucking he had started giving Pyrrha pushed him over the edge. He held her head down as he shot out ropes of cum, and Pyrrha relished in it, though she preferred to usually get a facial, she was fine with just getting a faint taste this time since she knew they needed to be quiet.

Jaune's hand soon slipped free from her ponytail as he came, slumping in his chair just a little bit as he enjoyed his bliss. Pyrrha finished off her hard earned treat and when she stopped feeling Jaune's cock twitch or letting out cum, she pulled her head off his shaft, letting the slowly softening appendage free in complete silence.

She very swiftly began to pull out her earplugs and the sash off of her head. Then, after having her sight and hearing returned to her, she used said sash to gently wipe and mess she felt on her eyes, nose, mouth, and chin.

She even slightly wiped off the much messier parts of jaune's cock with the same sash afterwards. As she did, Pyrrha pulled out her scroll as she did and double checked her appearance. After assuring that she looked as normal and inconspicuous as possible, she put her scroll away, tucked Jaune's penis back into his uniform pants, zipping and redoing his buckle after she did so, and then tucked her used sash down her shirt. After finishing all of that, she fluidly slid up into her seat next to Jaune in the back corner of the classroom, and smiled to herself when she noticed that her fellow classmates were either asleep, dowsing off, or actually paying attention in Weiss's case. The important thing was that none of them were looking back their way, and Pyrrha smiled contently as she rubbed her thighs together, very turned on by the fact that they had gotten away with her most recent debaucherous fantasies.

Pyrrha looked next to her to Jaune, who was recovered and sitting up straight once again, and slowly slid her hand onto his thigh and gently rubbed it affectionately. She was so happy he was willing to indulge her fantasies like this.

Simple and straightforward lovemaking was wonderful with Jaune, but she had to admit that it was definitely a new kind of rush to do slightly naughtier things every now and then to spice things up~.

[lwde-encrusted-sideblog]

While everyone's eating in silence someone asks "hypothetically if she wasn't trying to kill us would you fuck salem" alternatively "if your partner got grimified like Salem would you still fuck" chaos ensues

The moment the question came out of Nora's mouth, everyone paused, silent. She only said it in passing, probably expecting no one to hear her.

Ozpin: *Taking Control* I WOULD!

Oscar: I wouldn't!

Ozpin: I'm answering for myself Oscar!

Ruby: I'm with Oscar. I'm not down for it.

Blake: I mean ...

Jaune: I'd be down. I could use a good fuck, and I think she could to. It's probably been a while for her.

Yang: Hold up, Blake, Babe-

Blake: Think of the Kinky Magic stuff we could do!

Ozpin: It's Incredible!

Yang + Oscar: SHUT UP OZ!

Nora: You know, I thought that would get ignored like everything else.

Ren: No.

Blake: I'm just saying, There might be something interesting to try!

Yang: Okay, I mean, it's not like the Grimm part-

Blake: *Guilty look*

Yang: ... Blake, please- I mean if it were You? I'd get it, but too much stuff has happened with Salem-

Ruby: My sister and her Girlfriend are perverts. I'm on a Team of Perverts!

Weiss: I haven't said anything!

Nora: Then answer the question!

Weiss: *Blushing* I don't need to do anything I don't want to!

Ruby: Oh my god my whole team is Filthy!

Jaune: I'd fuck Pyrrha if she was brought back as a Grimm. I've had dreams about it.

Everyone: We Know Jaune.

Ruby: *Stands up, starts walking* I'm done! I'm going! I am Leaving!

Nora: Me and Ren would fuck each other! Waht about you guys and You're partners?

Ren: I would not fuck you if you were a Grimm.

Nora: WHAT!

Ruby: *Turns around, Sits Down* Actually I think I can See it. Might need to be careful with my eyes though.

Weiss: So NOW there's a conversation. Maybe the Rose has been dirtied herself~

Oscar: I am no longer a part of this Conversa- I do not care Oz! I'm not sticking around for this! I'm Heading off!

Ozpin: She gives mad Head.

Oscar: I DIDN'T WANT TO KNOW THAT, OZ!

[sir-adamus]

I just find it amusing that people who claim to care about Monty’s vision don’t want that story to be finished because it didn’t go the way they wanted and are saying it is not profitable. That they’d rather new writers with Kerry and having the new people in charge of how the reboot should go. Which if I had to guess dumbing down the girls, bowing down to ironwood/adam/jacques, making them side pieces for the men, harems for Jaune, and bla/ck sun instead of the bees.

this is sort of a continuation on the previous ask - i think if you were to ask these people what they supposedly want out of the show, you'd get that kind of stuff but not all at once and not to the same degree from all of them. you wouldn't get a consistent consensus and in fact i suspect they would all contradict each other to varying degrees in irreconcilable ways

because again, the point isn't what they actually want out of the show, they don't care - it's to be obnoxious

[itsclydebitches]

Team RWBY's refusal to ask questions about the EA is even more frustrating when you contrast it with volume 6. Like these are the characters who were willing to violate Ozpin's privacy just because his secrets *might* have included info relevant to them (but they didn't know that for sure). But in V9, when faced with stuff that is *directly related* to the Gods and Magic, while Salem has most of the keys she needs to end the world, full worst-case scenario, NOW they're not demanding answers???

I think that difference really highlights how secrecy is what motivates the group in Volume 6, rather than self-preservation. Yang doesn't actually care about the danger carrying the Relic around may cause because, if she did, she would have been equally upset at Ruby choosing to carry it around Atlas. Rather, she's upset that Ozpin withheld that information from them. As you point out, they don't know going in whether understanding a) how the Lamp works and b) what Jinn has to say is truly relevant to their part (key words there) in the fight, but because Ozpin is, again, withholding that information, now they have to have it. Which on a purely human level I get because hell, who likes learning that they're out of the loop, particularly when it comes to apocalyptically relevant info?? But as has been pointed out extensively, that knee-jerk displeasure is undermined by considerations like how many secrets the girls have kept across the series, Ozpin's personal history/trauma, the danger that comes with more and more people having access to such information (as they just saw with Lionheart), and the maturity with which the girls want to be treated. Sometimes being an adult isn't having all the insider knowledge; sometimes it's learning the importance of accepting "No" as an answer.

In constrast, the girls are rarely shown to be intrinsically motivated in later Volumes. Volumes 1-3, and even Volume 4, are a different matter because back then they were asking basic questions (what's this White Fang group up to?) and taking action to discover things for themselves (something is going on at Mountain Glenn, let's figure out what!). Now, the girls not only demand the information that is explicitly positioned as a secret (they demand it BECAUSE it's secret), but otherwise do nothing to further their/others' understanding of important situations. Why would they politely bother to ask Ozpin anything now that everyone is getting along again (or wait until the very last second to learn something, i.e. how the Staff works)? Why would Ruby bother to have more than one conversation with Maria about her eyes? Why should Yang hear anything about their mother from Qrow? Why would they share the information with Ironwood when he's bending over backwards to be upfront with them? Why would they work to establish new allies rather than continually fighting them? Why bother to ask ANYTHING Salem related in the Ever After? Hell, I don't actually think this is a good idea because it would result in Jaune saving the day off screen, but it is wild to me that the girls not only spent all that time there, but he spent a lifetime in the EA and never took a few weeks to start hunting down Salem options on the off chance he got back...

[howi99]

Pet AU

God...I feel sorry for jaune but also for his team. I can see Adam being hard on jaune as he is very weak and not prepared for combat.

I can say jaune would give it his all but he is very unprepared. But maybe there is a silver lining with this. Jaune was made leader his strength right now is his brains and strategy. Maybe he starts training with all his team mates every day to start trying to catch up?

PE class

Blake: You know, it's impressive how Jaune isn't actually dying on us.

Ilia: *shrug* If anything, he got a good amount of stamina for an untrained civilian.

Jaune: *Running laps with all his equipment on* How *huff* many *huff* more?

Adam: *behind him, running as well with a whistle in his mouth* "whistle" Less question, more running!

Jaune: *huff* Fuuuuu-

Blake: No swearing! Mo- i mean headmistress Kali is watching us.

Jaune: -dge.

Kali: *who is looking at everyone's training* You know Blake, I don't mind if you call me mom on campus.

Blake: It's weird.

Kali: *clenching her poor heart* My daughter is in her rebel phase. Oh the humanity!

Blake: *roll her eyes*

Adam: *whistle* Ok, we can stop.

Jaune: Oh thank god!

_____

Study time

Adam: ... I don't understand.

Jaune: What do you mean?

Adam: Why are we learning about literature instead of training to kill grimm?

Jaune: *looking at his own paper* I mean, we still need to be educated. Besides, i don't see Blake and Ilia complaining.

Blake and Ilia: *both reading the same book. They are both smiling like idiots*

Adam: They have... A weird obsession with that series. I think it's called ninja of love?

Jaune: *shrug* the prof said we could choose the book we wanted to write our dissertation about. As long as it's not porn, i don't care what they both are reading.

Adam: *was going to say that it probably was smut, then just give up* What did you choose?

Jaune: *give the book he was writing about to Adam* Take a look.

Adam: "The girl who fell through the world." Hey, i know that story.

Jaune: You do?

Adam: Yeah! I was always a fan of the rusted knight.

Jaune: *chuckle* like everyone else.

Adam: What? You prefer another one?

Jaune: Yeah, the Red Warrior. The man who saves the less fortunate and helps the rusted knight and Alyx during his adventures!

[howlingday]

RWBY Gone Woke

Jaune: (Tied up) Damn you, Adam! When I get out of here, I'll-

Adam: You'll do what, human? "Save the day"? I don't think even YOU could stop me now!

Jaune: We'll see about (Breaks free) THAT!

Adam: Dammit, she's free!

Jaune: That's just a taste of what I've got! And now to finish this! (Pulls out gun)

Adam: Whoa, whoa, whoa! Time out, time out!

Jaune: What?

Adam: You've been carrying a gun this whole time?!

Jaune: Of course I have a gun. I'm a huntsman.

Adam: And with- With this gun, you planned to shoot me?

Jaune: ...Yes.

Adam: Wow! Wow, that- That- That's crazy, man!

Jaune: How is it crazy?

Adam: No punching? No shield tossing? Just- You were gonna just shoot me?!

Jaune: Yeah, that's why I'm here. We- We're fighting, you know. You're a wanted criminal. What, did you think we were fighting this whole time just for me to wag my finger at you?

Adam: It just comes off a little extreme, don't you think?

Jaune: ...You're a terrorist.

Adam: Ah! There it is! Everyone I disagree with is a terrorist!

Jaune: YES! You're the leader of a terrorist organization!

Adam: Aw~! Baby's first buzzwords!

Jaune: You're literally a racial supremacist.

Adam: Oh, it must be so scary, being so far out of your human echo chamber~!

Jaune: Oh, fuck off! Alright, open wide.

Adam: Wait, wait, wait!

Jaune: What?!

Adam: ...So you won't even debate me?

Jaune: ...What?

Adam: You don't even want to have an honest debate with me?

Jaune: An honest debate?

Adam: What, are you too afraid?

Jaune: What is there to debate?! You're a terrorist!

Adam: Then why not debate me?!

Jaune: Why would I- Fine! Fine! I'll debate you! What are we debating?

Adam: ...

Adam: You're trying to trap me.

Jaune: HOW?

Adam: Oh, you'll twist my [SAMPLE TEXT] and make me look like the bad guy, aren't you?

Jaune: YOU'RE WEARING A MASK SHAPED AFTER A GRIMM! YOU ALREADY LOOK LIKE THE BAD GUY!

Adam: You know what you have? You have this "woke mind virus" that's been floating around!

Jaune: The fuck are you talking about?!

Adam: I'm sorry to say this, but you're brainwashed. You won't even hear the other side!

Jaune: ALRIGHT, ENOUGH! I see where this is going, and I get it, okay? Woke. Terrorist. I get it. This is all very political, but I don't really care. But you know what? There's one point you made that I kind of agree with; violence doesn't have to be the immediate answer.

--------------------------------------------------

Later, at the combination taco/chicken place...

Adam: Oh my god, you are so right... This is amazing...

Jaune: A taco in one hand, a bucket of mashed potatoes in the other. THAT'S what I think everyone should be free to enjoy!

Adam: I- And I'm not joking when I say this, but when I took just one bite of this with a sip of this iconic soft drink and now my entire ideology has completely changed! I am no longer filled with violence and spite! I believe in... in good shit now! I believe in the popular opinion!

Jaune: Man, that- That is fucking fantastic to hear...

Adam: Isn't it?

Jaune: I was worried that I was going to have to paint the walls with red- with your blood, y'know?

Adam: Yes, my blood is red.

Jaune: And now we're just chillin'! I mean, this is like a reference for me!

Adam: It's good!

Jaune: It's very good!

Adam: Would you like a sip of my iconic soft drink?

Jaune: Nah, sorry, I don't actually like that stuff-

Adam: (Whips out weapon) YOU SON OF A WHORE!

Jaune: WHATAREYOUNOTGONNADEBATE MENOW?! AREYOUNOTGONNA DEBATEME?!

[heliosthegriffin]

Jaune strolled down the hallway when a shadowy mass crashed into him, holding him against the wall.

"Ow." His eyes widened looking down the iron-sights of a pistol from the barrel-side backwards into a pair of golden eyes. Blake stood there, vibrating in place, arm trembling as she held Jaune up one-armed, though it seemed not for very much longer.

They locked eyes for a minute, then Jaune opened his mouth. "Hello, this is Jaune Arc, please put him down as you're leaving your message, have a nice day."

He quickly got a better look down those iron-sights, quickly becoming more concerned due to Blake's iron-sights being a sword. "Shut your mouth."

"Alright." Jaune quickly zipped it, as he was dealing with someone crazy enough to use a sword, tip of which was facing them, as iron-sights, she was capable of anything as far as he knew.

She looked at him, face sweating, eyes dilated, and worse of all, she was smiling. "Know what you did it."

Jaune looked down at her, easy since she was lifting him against the wall and him being several heads taller than her. "Which was what?"

She was trembling, mouth fighting to not form a smile, eyes wide and bright. "Look at you, walking around not a care in the world, that junk in the trunk should be making you ride so low that you spark up the road behind you, yet you got something under the hood that's keeping you level," She licks her lips. "And, well you know what they say about curiosity and that cat."

Up against the wall, barrel against his cheek, Jaune stares down at the mad woman. "Blake, I don't own a car."

"Oh, don't I know it, yet you got a whole cake truck, don't you. Makes me wonder what you're doing with all that beef & sausage, you trying to look like a fully meal?"

"I haven't even had breakfast yet."

"Doesn't stop you from looking like you'd filling me up."

Jaune squirms a bit, noticing that Blake's arm was on the verge of letting go, she flinches back, letting go, withdrawing the weapon as well. "I"m going now," He looks at her, slowly backing away. "Just stay there, and do not pursue."

Blake stiffens up. "You can walk away from me, Jaune, but you can't walk away from the truth! Deny it all you want, you look like a full course meal, and I'm starving!" She lurches forward, hands reaching for him.

Jaune pulls out a can of tuna, tears the lid off with his raw strength, and hands it to her. "Here, now you can leave me in peace."

Blake stares at him, alternating between him and the tuna, then sighs, taking the tuna. "This dense-ass soon to be mother-fucker," She grabs the tuna. "If I wasn't actually hungry, damn." When she looks up, Jaune was already turning the corner. "Hate to see him go, love to watch him leave... Did I have something to warn him about?"

Jaune just as he was rounding the corner, was pressed against the wall, again, and he looked down at Yang, which wasn't hard as she was leaning holding him at a lower angle. Strangely though, she was wearing a police uniform. "You got a license for all that cake, sir?"

"Actually, I do," He holds out to her a permit, showing that he was in fact, Kingdom certified baker. Yang took it, stared at it, then tore it apart.

"Not anymore."