#I about had a panic attack in front of the person who worked there bc I hated it so much

[sadgirlautumn]

Also I hate those payment stations in stores that are essentially a giant iPad that saves all your info

[deancoded-deangirl]

I am in the truck shaking and trying to breathe slowly and not throw up but my stomach is in knots and terrified.

[dreamescapeswriting]

Blooms Of Serenity ~ BC

WORD COUNT: 1.7K

GENRE: comfort fic, chan being very sweet and comforting toward a reader who has had a hard time with their anxiety/panic attacks lately, cute boyfriend chan, NON IDOLVERSE, established relationships

PAIRING: Chan x Fem!Reader

⤜Copyright: © DreamEscapesWriting - February 2024

⤜MASTERLIST

Sliding out of the seat carefully you held your hand out to Chan who was still refusing to let you take off the blindfold he'd put on you about an hour ago. Part of you was a little sad he'd refused to let you see, you loved going on night drives with Chan since you'd spend all of your time looking up at the stars that were scattered across the sky it was one of your favourite things to do.

"Are you going to pout all night?" Chan whispers in your ear, his breath catching on your skin making your whole body shiver. 

"No, but I'll stop sooner if you let me see," You giggle trying to tempt him but it wasn't going to, Chan had been working on this surprise all week long and he wasn't going to ruin it now. 

In the heart of a packed city, where life echoed everywhere and it didn't matter how far you went you'd still hear the sounds of car horns or people yelling there existed a small haven of tranquillity known as the Serenity Garden. After extensive googling, Chan had managed to find the little slice of heaven for you.

Its charm lay not only in its lush greenery and vibrant blooms of flowers but also in its ability to soothe troubled souls. And it was here that Chan decided to bring you.

The gardens were said to be completely silent, breaking away from the hustle and bustle of life which was exactly what you needed right now.

As Chan stepped into the garden, the air seemed to change, becoming lighter, and more fragrant and turned his attention to you, his hands shakily taking off the blindfold as he studied your reactions. As soon as the blindfold was off and your eyes had adjusted to the light your once tense shoulders relaxed slightly as you took in the sight of the colourful flowers swaying gently in the breeze. The place looked like something straight out of a fantasy romance book.

"Chan...Where did you even find this?" Your voice barely came out as a whisper as you walked further into the gardens, being careful of the flowers as you strolled.

"I'll never reveal my secrets,  Google did play a huge part," He winks at you playfully as he smiles to himself. He was pretty proud of his find and happy with himself that it seemed to ease you, even if just for a little while.  

Your eyes were still busy trying to take everything in, the garden stretched out like a patchwork quilt, with winding pathways meandering through lush greenery and colourful blooms. Huge trees provided perfect picnic spaces underneath them.

"This place is...beautiful," Your voice cracked a little as you turned to look back at Chan, who had a giant grin on his face.

"You needed time away from everything, so I found a small home away from home," He smiled, taking your hand in his and kissing it softly before making his way through the garden with you.

Every corner of the garden held its own enchantment, there were clusters of roses in shades of pink and red, and beds of vibrant tulips that swayed gracefully in the night breeze. There were even patches of wildflowers dotted around the landscape, something you truly never thought you'd see in person. 

"This is like something from a book," You whispered to Chan, somehow it felt wrong if you were to speak too loudly, like somehow you would disturb the peace that was around.

"I knew you'd love it," He chuckled softly, taking you toward the centre of the garden where a majestic water fountain was sat. It was a marble basin adorned with intricate carvings that all depicted mythical creatures and flowing vines. The water trickled from the spouts filling the night air with the sound of cascading water.

"I love it and you," You told him as he carefully sat down on a brick bench that was sat in front of the fountain. 

"I love you too, this is your sanctuary," He told you as you carefully sat down beside him, smiling and letting out a sigh of relief as you just let the world be.

Sitting there amidst the blooms, you felt a sense of peace wash over you, a welcome respite from the storm raging within your mind. But even in this serene setting, the echoes of your anxiety lingered, threatening to pull you back into its grasp.

As if he could sense your distress Chan wrapped his arm around your shoulder and pulled you closer to him.

"I'm here, Yn," He whispered softly, his voice soothing your frazzled nerves as if like magic,

"You're not alone." You leaned into his embrace, finding solace in his presence, something you'd always managed to do with your boyfriend. There was something about him you couldn't quite explain, something you never thought could be possible but he calmed you.

He made you feel safe and secure whenever you were together, safe enough to let your mind go blank as you just relaxed against him. Sleeping next to someone had never been easy for you before but with Chan you always found yourself able to fall asleep with ease and even sleep through the night. Your body trusted him.

"Just close your eyes and let it be," Chan whispered, you closed her eyes, letting the sound of the water fountain and the sweet scent of flowers envelop you like a protective cocoon, Chan's strong arms around you helping all the more. With each breath, you felt the tight knot of anxiety within your chest slowly begin to unravel.

"Listen to the leaves." He said, his breath warm against your ear as you kept your eyes closed.

"Each one carries a message of hope, reminding us that even in the darkest of times, light is always there to be found." Chan pressed a gentle kiss to your temple, his hands gently running up and down your arms as you felt a lump in your throat beginning to form.

"You're stronger than you realised, Yn." He continued, his voice filling you with hope and confidence.

"You've faced so many challenges before and you've emerged stronger every single time...You have the courage and the resilience to overcome this..." He stilled his hands before moving closer to your ear,

"I believe in you," He whispered as your tears began to flow, you turned to bury your face in Chan's chest and he smiled weakly.

"I know it's hard," He told you as his arms tightened around you.

"But you're not and never will be alone in this. I'm here for you, every step of the way." He tells you as you snuggled closer to him.

"We'll face this together and we'll be stronger on the other side." He promised you, and you knew you could believe him, you just knew.

As you sat there, wrapped in each other's arms, you felt a flicker of hope ignite within you, a beacon of light in the darkness you'd been consumed in for days. With Chan by your side, you knew that you could weather any storm, and conquer any fear. Together you'd be able to emerge from anything victious.

"Thank you, Chan...for everything," You sniffled a little and Chan smiled using his hands to gently swipe away the tears that had fallen.

"You never have to thank me for something like this, I just want you to come to me in the future." He told you as you nodded, cuddling into him and smiling warmly.

After a few hours of sitting there, enjoying the night sky and the sounds of water you knew it was time to head home but there was something different. It felt as though there was a renewed sense of purpose coursing through your veins. You knew that the road ahead would be filled with challenges, but you also knew that with Chan by your side, you were going to be able to face anything that came your way.

In the days that followed your visit to the  Garden, you found yourself leaning on Chan more than ever, which he was adoring every second of. All he ever wanted was to be there for you, it was part of being a boyfriend he was supposed to be there to support you in times of hardship. He became your rock, your steady anchor in the tumultuous sea of emotions. With his unwavering support, you began to face her anxiety head-on, armed with newfound courage and determination.

The two of you had developed different coping mechanisms that would help you out whenever your mind would become stormy. You took walks to the park almost every other night, leaving your phones at home and just walking hand in hand, breathing in the crisp air as you tried to let things go. Throughout every single part of it, Chan had been there, a constant source of love and encouragement, never once letting you go through any of it alone just as he had promised.

Through everything, Serenity Garden was your sanctuary, a place of refuge and where Chan would take you when everything would get too much again. You both returned to it often, seeking solace amidst the flowers and fountains and every time you came back you felt a little lighter as if the weight of the world was lifted from your shoulders, even for a short time. The two of you were back again tonight, cuddled together on the brick bench, surrounded by the gentle melody of the water fountain and the fragrant embrace of the flowers. Chan had his arms around you, pulling you close to him as his arms were a comforting shield around you.

"I love you, Yn," He whispered, his voice soft but fulled of unwavering sincerity. 

"I will always be here for you, through the good times and the bad." Tears threatened to spill from your eyes as you stared up at him, overwhelmed by how much Chan truly meant to you and how deep his love went for you. At that moment, you knew he was absolutely your soulmate, your partner in life's adventures.

"I love you too, Chan." Your voice choked with emotion/

"Thank you for being my rock, for never giving up on me even when I felt like I was giving up on myself." Chan brushed a gentle kiss across your forehead, 

"I'll never give up on you and I'll never let you give up on yourself," He whispered to you, kissing your forehead one last time before you sat there, wrapped in each other's arms, your love burning amidst the tranquil beauty of Serenity Garden and you felt peace completely wash over you.

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[mixelation]

my coping mechanism today is writing about a NinjaCon panel where they rank kage. like the audience yells out things to rank and a panel of "experts" pick the top 5 kage.

it's minato POV so i obviously picked "body count" for the first ranking. the panel very carefully defines it as "other ninja struck down in combat" and minato is like "ah of course, bc battles are cool but all the random civilians who starved to death due to our proxy wars aren't" and then he looks at tori and is like: "wait is she going to freak out"

and then when she doesn't he jumps immediately into joking around about murder with her u_u

idk i think minato is nice in that he doesn't like needless cruelty and he's willing to work with people he doesn't necessarily like that much to make them happy/satisfied bc he wants to lead by getting people to want to work with/for him, and he's very good at that. so i think if you randomly had a panic attack in front of him, he might rub your back or help you into an isolated area or w/e, but i don't think he'd actually care unless you were from his tiny inner circle (which is all people he's vetted as worth caring about, so their breakdowns are obviously merited and yours are probably just a personality weakness, duh)

at this point in the fic i think team 4 is at some sort of weird periphery of his inner circle. he does want to maintain a good informal relationship but he doesn't quite care-care. idk how he'd react to tori having an actual problem besides the kind he can just murder. those are easy. barely real problems

i also want to write a scene later where they get dinner together (bc kakashi has run off with a hot cosplayer) and he's like. okay now that we're isolated in a foreign country. tell me what you did to orochimaru? pleeeease? and tori's answer is basically like "well, he gave me an order i didn't like, so then obviously i spent years subtly sabotaging his village so i could pull the trigger and flee whenever i wanted"

tori: don't worry though

tori: if i didn't like an order you gave me, i'd tell you <3

and that's character growth baby

[onyourowndaisymae]

Yoo I have two request which I’ll send the other one separately but I am in an ANGSTY mood rn sooo yah also been binging ur headcanons and stuffs and I just love the way you write ?? It’s so entertaining lol

AnywY the actual request: can you write like a one shot or headcanons if you prefer of mc who is struggling after the belphie incident ?? Like they feel like they’ve mostly forgiven him and can act normally around him and they’re friends and take naps together but sometimes the flash back just HITS THEM and they have nightmares and panic attacks that can be so bad sometimes someone needs to get Simeon to calm them down. Maybe something of how the brothers react/treat mc and belphie? Idk I’m just thirsting for like MEGA ANGST rn bc my dad made me cry little bit lmao 😭

it comes at night

hello anon! i'm terribly sorry you're in such an angsty mood, though i thank you for all the love-- and for sending this request right as these ideas were on the front of my mind. it genuinely makes me so happy to see people enjoying my work, and it makes all the writer's block and such worth it. i cannot express enough how much i love seeing all the comments, reblogs, etc. as people engage with my work.

anyways. i'm not sure how i feel about this piece, especially with how LONG it ended up being, but maybe that's just my mushy brain talking after looking at it too long. regardless-- i hope you enjoy (well, y'know, in like a sad and angsty way).

synopsis: you thought you would be able to move on like all the others. your body was healed, your anxiety tucked neatly behind a mental wall built to keep you safe. yet something in you was stuck. you couldn't just move on. you were trapped in a battle between your friendship with belphegor and the fear gnawing at your brain as you remembered what exactly he did to you. when the dam finally breaks, your whole brain floods with terror, until you're swept away with it. nobody can save you now.

genre: angst, no happy end, just a big ol spoonful of sadness

word count: ~3.1k

content warnings: chapter 16 spoilers, graphic(?) discussions of death, depictions of panic attacks, nightmares, mc progressively getting worse from fear + lack of sleep

it's funny how time works. 

you'd been around your fair share of years. you’d grown, you’d changed, you’d spent your entire life looking toward the future you had planned. then you, a mere human, were yanked into an unfamiliar world. you spent an entire year in the devildom– a year that simultaneously dragged on and flew by– and came out the other side a new person. a single year in the devildom has changed you more than the human realm has your entire life. time was a mischievous thing, always leaving you chasing behind in a fruitless pursuit of something you’ll never quite understand.

but, she also brings blessings with her. they say that time heals all wounds. you've always agreed with that sentiment. scraped knees and adolescent broken hearts are swept away with the passing days, trailing further and further behind you until one day you forget to look back and remember them. the pain scribbled down on diary pages or cried into pillow cases no longer stings like a fresh burn. these things are nothing but scars now. time has a special way of patching you up, of rubbing your back until the tears clear up and you can finally see again. that is how it's always been. 

where is time when you need it? 

she hasn't quite abandoned you, this much is true. cuts and bruises heal over the passing days. your hair and nails still grow. your body still changes, slowly but surely, marching onwards week after week. yet your mind is trapped in stasis. you struggle to break free, but at times the rot consumes you whole, until you’re crying under the covers and begging from respite from the memories. 

on the worst nights, you find yourself in the attic again, watching the door between you and belphegor swing open. you watch yourself march towards death.

you can still feel his hands around your neck, digging his claws into your fragile human skin like you're made of sand. the scent of blood-- your own blood, on the floors, on the walls, leaking from your torso and staining your clothes a permanent maroon-- still clings to the inside of your nose. even your wildest dreams could not erase the sight of his smug grin, the way his eyes lit up looking at your battered body.

no one person should have to carry the weight of realizing they're going to die. that's what you thought about when your body hit the bottom of the stairs, when belphegor tossed you down from the attic with a harsh laugh and punted your limp body into the entrance hall. you thought about how unfair this all was. you were just trying to help. you thought you were doing the right thing.

one of the worst parts of your untimely demise was watching the others react. the voices pool together in your head, like the colors of the rainbow twisting together on the surface of an oil spill. asmo's panicked shriek blends into satan's angry shouts, desperate to understand what's going on. lucifer's yelling almost drowns out the fearful cries coming from levi, held back by a very silent beel. 

but above all of that, you remember mammon. your first man, the first demon who took a chance on the defenseless little human, rushing to your side and gathering you in his arms like you were about to break. his hand on the side of your face, the tears streaming down his face, the shaky, desperate voice assuring you that you'll be okay and begging you to hang on, okay? please don't leave me. you can't remember if he was shaking or if it was your body's last ditch effort to stay conscious-- maybe both. your trembling fingers intertwined with his. words came out of your mouth, and you're not sure what exactly you said, but he only cried harder in response. 

and then, as your eyes shut for the final time, you woke at the bottom of the attic stairs. you had cheated death. 

your price? you had to carry the memories. 

the world kept spinning. days passed in the devildom. you returned to school, kept on top of your homework, spent your days in the house of lamentation alongside the seven demon brothers. you even got to know belphegor as he navigated his return home. he quickly grew fond of you. that, in and of itself, was jarring. but you returned each and every smile with one of your own. his actions were rooted in his own grief for his sister, you knew, and for that you could not fault him. you helped him repair the severed relationships between him and his elder siblings, stitching the family back together like a prized quilt until the seams of betrayal were sufficiently hidden. 

time is a traitorous bitch. why did she choose now to leave your wounds bare and bleeding?

everyone moved on but you. everyone got to wake up in the mornings without a nagging anxiety holding them back. the others could hang out with belphegor day in and day out without a growing feeling of dread popping up when you think you're safe. 

he killed you. he was grieving. your blood drenched the entryway floors as he laughed. he has grown. you watched the light leave mammon's eyes as you slipped away. belphie has been nothing but kind to you since that day. you fucking died. 

you wish your mind could pick a side. did you forgive him, or did you resent him? was he your friend, or your killer? these answers evaded you in the dead of night as you struggled to sleep again. it was becoming more common for you to lose hours of rest to these nagging fears. who are you? are you even you anymore? did the switch in timelines scatter your atoms across countless universes, leaving the you that looks back at you in the mirror nothing more than a hollow shell? 

you thought that you could keep your mind on a tight leash, keep your cards close to your chest as you continued to live with the brothers. you were wrong.

the first meltdown came during a nap with belphie. you had grown to trust him-- you thought you trusted him-- enough to sleep around him. he'd coax you every so often into an afternoon nap. always in the light of day, always your choice. and for many afternoons, you were perfectly content with this arrangement. belphie was warm and cuddly, a perfect companion for a lazy afternoon. he had this way of making you feel safe as you slept-- the nightmares couldn't come when he was snuggled up next to you, when you were sure his actions were ones of affection and not another trick to gain your trust.

one afternoon, while the sun was beginning to set, you stirred under the warmth of the blankets. the body next to yours lingered close, steady breaths lulling you back to dreamland. you could stay like this forever, you thought.

and then you felt it. the gentle graze of a familiar cow tail against your skin.

something inside of you, a dam you didn't even know was there, snapped. a hot flash of panic rose up your throat as your whole body jerked away from the feeling. your eyes shot open and you found yourself in the last place you needed to be right now: the attic. you pulled yourself out of bed before your brain could catch up. colors flashed across your vision as a consequence. you whipped around, disoriented and upset, and spotted a sleeping belphie in the bed where you once were.

a sleeping, demon belphie.

the familiar curve of his horns made your throat spasm as you tried to breathe. the colors flashed in your vision again-- oh god, what a terrible time to be left defenseless-- as your brain tried to drag you back to that day. you could practically see his face shift from relief to malicious, insidious joy as he began to attack you.

"hehe... does it hurt? finding it hard to breathe? i'm sure it must be very unpleasant."

please. please no.

" i have to say, seeing a human face twisted in pain like this... why, it's so much fun that i can barely stand it! i... i can't contain the laughter!"

you weren't quite sure when you hit the ground, but it was loud enough to wake belphegor from his slumber. he peeled his body off the mattress, slow and dazed, as he looked for you.

"mc? what're you... what's going on?"

please don't. this can't be happening.

your lungs collapsed from the weight of your own panic. you gasped-- once, twice, as your vision went in and out. were you bleeding? your hand loosely brushed at the front of your clothes, but couldn't process whether that was blood or your vivid imagination. were you even breathing? your head felt light and heavy at the same time. the wires in your brain were all crossed, sending both resuscitation and shutdown signals to each part of your body. this feeling... this was too familiar.

were you dying?

"mc, what's going on?"

you came face to face with belphegor. your friend, your killer. the demon who had lured you up to this very attic to kill you, now gripping your shoulders as interrogated you inches from your face.

you screamed. you screamed until your brain shut off completely, leaving you in an inky pit of darkness as your consciousness slipped away.

the house was in disarray for several days. apparently, lucifer came in shortly after you passed out, mammon at his heels, to save the day. you woke up later in his bed, the room cold and empty, with a throbbing head and a tear stained pillow. you stumbled out into his office to find him at his desk, lost in some paperwork like always. the solemn look he gave you as your eyes met told you everything you needed to know.

from this day forth, your fear was now your constant companion.

nobody in the house of lamentation knew how to move forward. not you, not the brothers, not the widening gap growing between you all with each passing day spent in emotional limbo. finally, lucifer called everyone to a family meeting where, over the course of an hour or two, everyone came to an agreement to acknowledge what had happened and why, promised to be mindful of this trauma that you're carrying, and move forward like you requested.

silent days slowly but surely filled back up with laughter again. the brothers came back to your side at their own pace-- asmo first, within a matter of hours, then mammon shortly after, then the others in the following days.

belphegor was the last to come around. his silence spoke volumes about his guilt. he had no clue how to comfort you. he'd do anything to repent for his actions. yet that was the way that life worked, didn't it? some actions simply cannot be undone.

but you didn't let that stop you. despite the panic that closed your throat every time you saw him for the next month, you slowly earned his friendship again. you assured him that the attic incident was a one time thing, the remnants of a lost nightmare blending into your consciousness as you awoke.

until it wasn't a one time thing.

the nightmares crept up on you. the first one happened, of course, that same night, as you thrashed and wept into lucifer's pillows. then a week later, another. a week and a half after that, another. the frequency eventually became higher and higher, until you started planning your sleep schedule (or lack thereof) around your new insomniac tendencies. but even you couldn't manage to stay awake forever.

on a bad night, you'd wake up in tears, crying weakly to yourself as you tried to coax yourself back to bed. on worse nights, you'd shoot up out of bed, limbs tingling in fear, opting to spend the rest of the night in the common room until the others woke for the day. on the worst night, you finally broke. you shattered worse than you could have imagined.

you finally collapsed into bed, body shutting down after a three days of minimal sleep. you were starting to get shaky from the lack of rest, and your lack of appetite was upsetting the others. you crawled under the covers and let your brain slip out of your hands and off to dreamland.

what a fool you were to think you'd get by without nightmares.

visions of demonic teeth tearing at your flesh filled your head. you tried to run away, tried desperately to wake yourself up, but their claws sunk into your flesh. the pain was vivid, was real. memories of your death lived underneath your skin, ready to resurface in the dark of night when there was no escape. you fought back as best you could, kicking and screaming and trying to run, but you were no match for the supernatural strength of your demons. you eventually gave in, an act of learned helplessness, and surrendered yourself to your worst nightmares.

you woke up choking on your own tears. heaving, gasping breaths tried to save you, mixing with coughs as your body struggled to hang on. the tears finally gave way to the memories-- hot blood dripping from your torso, screaming faces begging you to stay, your head going fuzzy as your vision followed--and your screams escaped without a fight.

a mixed cacophony of voices came flooding in the room. you'd be touched by the gesture, seeking comfort in the arms of your dearest friends, if your brain hadn't reminded you that they were demons as well. nightmarish beasts with fangs and claws, predators built to rip your soft flesh from your bones and leave you to die like roadkill.

you felt a hand on your shoulder. who's was it? you could not tell. your first and only instinct was to scream for mercy, hot tears streaming down your face as mammon's hurt expression moved back out of your line of sight. your chest heaved with effort. it felt like your whole body was caving in on itself. you didn't even realize you were shaking as you curled your body into a ball. your side hit the mattress with a pathetic thud and you wept, bitter and fearful, as a panic attack kept you trapped in its grip.

you don't know how long you stayed curled up like that, wordless cries echoing from your room and into the hallway, but eventually the sound of approaching footsteps caught enough of your attention to forget the panic, even if just for a moment.

"hey, it's okay," a familiar, comforting voice approached, cutting through the fear like a moonlight on a stormy night. "mc, it's me, it's simeon. it's going to be okay."

you felt the bed shift under the weight of someone sitting down, and you blindly threw your body at the person before checking to see if it was really him. it took you a few moments to raise your head, and when you did, you saw him: simeon, your angel, blue eyes full of worry as he met your gaze.

you cried in his arms until you fell into a fitful, dreamless sleep.

the next morning was miserable, to say the least. breakfast was tense. they all watched you like a hawk, like you were a powder keg about to explode with one wrong move. you couldn't blame them. you were afraid of your own emotions, and on some level, you were afraid of them. your trauma was making you afraid of the very people you cared about the most. these brothers had welcomed you into their home, took care of you as you adjusted to life in the devildom, and yet you couldn't hold eye contact without breaking in to a cold sweat.

the only person who did not watch you was belphegor. he was nowhere to be found during breakfast, nor dinner, nor breakfast the following day. you tried to seek him out, but somehow the avatar of sloth had become a skilled sneak in his silence.

you finally caught him alone on day four of radio silence. you both had stayed home without realizing the other had also skipped school that day-- you, from the lack of sleep eating at your brain, and belphegor, with his usual routine of missing class to nap at the house of lamentation. he was curled up on the couch in the common room, basking in the warmth of the fireplace in his slumber. you decided to wait for him to wake up. you sat down on the couch opposite of the one where he rested and watched him, quietly, like he'd disappear if you dared to blink.

creepy? yes. but your brain was long ruined by sleep deprivation and gnawing anxiety to worry about such trivial things.

when he finally stirred, you gently called belphegor's name. he took a moment to finally look at the source of the voice, but when he did, his body froze as the two of you made eye contact. a few moments passed in silence. finally, he sat up and began to make a move to leave.

"wait."

he stopped, but his gaze did not meet yours. you rose from your seat and joined him on the couch. the youngest pulled his legs in, twisting his body into a defensive little ball, and countered your next sentence before you could even open your mouth.

"you shouldn't be here with me."

"i think i'm old enough to make decisions for myself."

he shifted uncomfortably in the silence. you spoke again.

"i miss you. and i'm sorry."

he scoffed to himself and stared at the fireplace. "don't know why you think you should be apologizing to me. i'm the one that's the problem."

"you're not a problem, belphie. i never meant to make you feel like one."

every hair on your body stood on end. your hands trembled against your wishes, so you sat on them to stay focused. you had to do this. you had to keep moving forward.

"i hurt you, mc. you're afraid i'm going to do it again."

you sighed-- it came out more shaky than you would have liked-- and looked down. how had it come to this? how had someone you'd grown to hold so dear become a stranger again?

"i don't want to stop being friends. i don't like when you avoid me."

"you still get nightmares, don't you?"

you pause. his icy gaze on the side of your head sent you into a cold sweat.

you smiled-- it felt more like a grimace, personally-- and prayed it didn't come across insincere. your fingers carefully intertwined with his. he met your gaze. you were thankful he couldn't see the way your chest tightened when you made eye contact. 

"i'm okay, belphie," you lied. 

this fear was going to be the death of you. 

[noahtally-famous]

thanks to my post abt the irony of trent & dave being labeled ‘normal guys’ and being definitely not normal, that got me thinking abt their dynamic.

i feel like they’d be great flatmates, buddies, that kind of bond. despite their differences in personality, their lifestyles and even those personality differences help more than hinder their friendship.

trent’s easygoing ‘cool & calm’ nature contrasts rlly well with dave’s more upright, judgmental one. trent can help dave see things (and ppl) differently while staying under the fire; dave can help trent take proper charge by getting him to realize who or what should be prioritized. (or even trent helps tap into his lowkey ‘take charge’ side whenever he drags dave away from an obsession.)

dave being a germaphobe and a neat-freak can work mostly well with trent’s ocd. i know in canon his ocd is described as numerical and nothing much more, but given how badly canon fucked him over, i like to think that trent’s deal with the number 9 is still there but it’s prominent in a lot more aspects of life (like how many exhales is enough, how many times to check the front doors lock, etc.)

dave gets it, he understands a lot of what trent goes through and feels, and he tries in his own way to show some solidarity. trent doesn’t judge his desire for neatness and he tries to keep that in mind so as not to get anything too dirty and he makes sure to help dave with his panic attacks bc he knows firsthand handling them alone constantly is a painful experience; dave doesn’t judge his ocd and interest in the number 9

(but dave does judge other ppl heavily whenever they judge them. trent gets quite amused by this—and endeared that there’s someone in his corner. he hasn’t ever met someone who’s supportive, let’s him do his thing, and understands parts of what he’s feeling)

they both have shitty love endeavors which is smth they bond over (likely while in a vulnerable position). they both try to matchmake too—it doesn’t usually go well

their family histories and childhood/adolescence get brought up last. both of them are a fan of suppressing/repressing until they either consciously or subconsciously don’t remember it. but in the end they do discuss it and it becomes yet another thing they bond over and understand each other about. the idea of being ‘normal�� when they clearly are not is smth that they both need to come to terms with—it takes a while.

(trent gets him to go to therapy)

trent helps dave get out more, do stuff that expands his horizons (like taking him to a drama brothers concert). (dave comes to him first over anyone else abt his sexuality crisis; trent talks him through it patiently, bringing up his own sexuality revelation)

i can see their dynamic as being temporary flatmates at first. or whatever it may be, their bond was initially meant to be a temporary “just for the time being” situation. but then overtime it becomes just as much or more permanent than their other friendships. they can get v domestic (even like cuddles, leaning against each other on the sofa, them just plopping their heads down on the other's lap ready to complain abt smth or other (or in trent's case, talk abt his newest song idea) and stuff like that platonically once they cross that bridge bc it’s relaxing and calming), their vibes contrast nicely, they help each other thrive in an environment of solidarity. just wholesome stuff bc given what both of them must’ve dealt with to make them the way they are, they must not have had a load of wholesomeness in the past

[book-place]

Tis the Season

Warnings: panic attacks, let me know if I missed any :)

Pairings: Damian Wayne x reader platonic

Request: I NEED SOME FLUFF

Can I pls request a batfam x reader who's the quite kid. He's never heard her talk (they usuallyjust use sign language, but they're not mute) and they're super anxious all the time. They're also super scared of Damian and his family members bc they look scary lol.Anyways, Damian had asked you if youd like to come over for a Christmas party they were having. You couldn't say no to your best (and only) friend, so u agreed. You felt anxious the WHOLE time you were at the party, you weren't used to interacting this much and you started to feel stressed out. You could feel a panic attack brewing so you asked to use the restroom. You had waited about 10 minutes in the restroom until Damian noticed you were gone so he quickly sent you a message asking where you were (thru text)."I think im having a panic attack?", was all you said before damian quickly came over to the restroom and knocked on the door. When you opened he say that you were shaking. He continued to help u through it

Request by: @ladyagagaslefttoe

*not my gif*

Summary: Things get to be too much during Damian’s Christmas party

A/N: Welcome to Day 12 of Book Places 12 Days of Christmas Celebration

Please don’t plagiarize my work, you may reblog if you like but I’m asking that you don’t steal my hard work

“Don’t be nervous,” Though Damian spoke the words out loud, he subconsciously signed them quickly to you, not thinking much of it as he did so.

You glanced at him and nodded your head slightly, the anxiousness not draining from your body, even at his comforting words and tone.

You had been best friends with the boy for three years, and this was the first time you were spending Christmas together, at his house with a party his father always threw.

Your parents had been invited as well by Bruce, which was the only reason you had been able to go, and though he didn’t show it, Damian was beyond thrilled to have you there with him. Normally these parties were dull and took far too long. But if you were there, time would go by much quicker and he could actually enjoy himself.

Of course though, you were a bit timid about today, having always been a shy and quiet person.

As a matter of fact, Damian had only heard you talk a small handful of times within your friendship, but you weren’t mute. That was originally why he learned sign language, so that you would feel more comfortable being able to communicate with him.

The two of you weaved in and out of people as you made your way through the manor, you following after Damian who was trying to scope out the best way to get to the snack table.

The farther you went into the house, the more anxious you got. And pretty soon, your breathing had begun to pick up to an abnormal pace and your hands had begun shaking.

Hesitantly, you reached in front of you and tugged at your best friend's sleeve slightly to gain his attention.

His head automatically snapped back to you and his eyes scanned your panic-stricken face, “What is it?” He asked immediately, “What is wrong?”

You just shook your head slightly from side to side and signed that you just needed to use the bathroom.

“Do you want me to stand outside and wait for you?” He didn’t even hesitate to offer.

Guilt started to pour into you as you realized that would take away from him, and he would be missing part of his own party by worrying about and waiting for you.

So instead of saying yes like you so badly wanted to, you shook your head and signed that you would be fine, that you knew the way there, and slipped off into the crowd before he could react.

The whole way there, you felt your vision blur so you stuck to the outsides of the room, trailing your hand across the wall as you walked for support in case you were to fall.

When you finally were able to make it to the bathroom, which was thankfully vacant, you practically slammed the door before locking it and sliding down the back of it until your knees were curled up to your chest.

There were so many people out there. It was so loud. So bright. There were so many different smells of food. The music seemed to be coming from every which way-

You hadn’t even realized that you had begun rocking back and forth with hot tears spilling out of your eyes as it became harder and harder to breathe. Your lungs felt like they were squeezing in on themselves, while at the same time you felt as though your throat was closing.

From your pocket, you felt your phone begin to vibrate as it buzzed and it slipped out and onto the floor.

Through your blurry vision, you were just able to make out Damian’s name. He was calling you.

Fumbling with your fingers, all thoughts of ruining his party flew out of your mind as the only thing you could focus on was that you needed him. You needed your best friend.

“Y/n?” You heard his voice call worriedly through the phone, “Where are you? It’s been ten minutes and you haven’t responded to my text messages.”

Normally, he wouldn’t call you, not wanting to force you to talk. But he had begun getting worried, especially because of the state you had left in.

“D-Damian…” You stuttered out in between labored breaths, “I- I think I’m having a… having a panic attack.”

“I’ll be right there.” Came his immediate reply, and not even a moment later, there was a soft knocking on the door.

“Y/n?” Damian’s voice came muffled through the wood door, “It’s me, may I come it?”

Shakily, you scooted away from the door and clumsily unlocked it.

He quickly slipped in and shut and locked the door behind him once more, sinking to his knees before you as he took in your distressed state.

Gently, he shushed you, “It is okay, I am here now,” His tone was gentler than you had ever heard it, “There is nothing to be worrying about. You can breathe, just keep breathing.”

The sight of him alone was enough to help your breathing slow down a bit. You had always felt at ease when he was around.

After a few more moments of silence as he let you try to calm down, he took a box you hadn’t noticed from beside him and presented it to you.

“I have gotten you a gift.” He said, holding it out for you to take.

By then, your panic attack had been reduced to nothing more than mere sniffles and slight shaking in the hands as you slowly took the box from him.

After shooting one last glance in his direction, you slowly removed the top and a gasp slipped through your lips. There, sat a beautiful leather bound notebook.

You had always loved to write. Not only did it calm you down, but it gave you a place to put your thoughts and feelings that you never were able to express out loud.

“T-thank you,” You whispered, eyes filling with tears for a different reason than before as you looked at the beautiful object, “I love it.”

He waved a hand dismissively, as if it were nothing, “Are you alright, though?” His eyes searched yours for any sign that you weren’t.

The smallest of smiles crept up on your lips, “I am now.”

The Superior Robin ❤️- @ineedmorefanfics2 @sambucky8 @spidyyparker @i-writes-things

Honorable mention to @angelic-simp bc ily and why not? 🦝

[asmo-d3us]

Marauders Era Characters at a Strip Club?

TW: Sexual themes, explicit language, homosexuality (that shouldn’t be a warning but oh well!), and strippers! Many of them!

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

James Potter:

He’s absolutely petrified to step inside a strip club. He’s terrified of what he’ll see, and the trauma he’ll gain.

Is looking at Reg all baffled, not believing that he’s actually allowed inside with his boyfriend by his side. This was all Barty’s idea, the prick!

The whole time he’s just jaw dropped, eyes wide, absolutely astonished at the sight before him. He’s unable to talk and whenever he can, he’s mumbling or stuttering. The strippers don’t turn him on, it’s just surprising being this close to them.

“Why can’t you be a stripper, Reg?” He says when they leave, and all Regulus does is laugh and wink.

He’s just standing in the corner with Remus patting his back, and all of a sudden Evan pops up out of nowhere and starts dragging him somewhere. James is all confused like, “Where are we going?” And Evan is just smirking all flirtatiously. He then gets slammed down into a seat, and gets a strip tease dance by Barty (who had been working there the longest and had gotten the gang in), Evan (who sometimes visits and does some dances), and Regulus (who secretly works there). Sirius is revolted and Rosekiller is so fucking proud of themselves they even high five after getting James off like that.

OPTIONAL: My guy notices someone is checking out Reg, so he gets all defensive and pulls his man close to him. That other guy still doesn’t give up and tries to pay Reg for a strip tease, but James has enough and beats the shit out of him. Barty and Evan of course join, because they know the reason as to why James of all people is doing this. Regulus finds this hot. All three of them. Fighting for him. 🤭

Sirius Black:

Is jokingly teasing Remus by saying things like, “Imagine if I was dancing like that?”

He isn’t nervous to go to a strip club. He’s more excited about it than anything else. He was the first person who had agreed to Barty’s request about them all visiting his work place.

Is drinking glass upon glass of alcohol there, and luckily Lupin is there to make sure he doesn’t waste himself too badly.

Barty, who’s currently on his shift, calls Sirius on stage and they both dance together. He knows that Sirius wanted to show off in front of Remus and also that it would give them good money, so that’s why he did it. Siri better thank him for this!

Later on, he’s seen making out with Remus in the corner. That’s what they do the whole night. They break apart sometimes to go comfort James and/or Marlene who’s having a gay panic attack (Dorcas is absolutely enjoying the sight).

OPTIONAL: When he dances on stage next to Barty, he gets completely naked up to his boxers. He literally dances half naked. And it’s hot. Everyone thinks it’s hot (besides the lesbians, Peter, Barty, Evan, and Regulus). Barty is roaring with laughter at the sight that he can barely keep his balance, so he falls on top of Siri, and they both just tumble down the stage.

Remus Lupin:

Respectfully does not watch any of the strippers. Instead, he sits down and reads a book, or goes on his phone. It depends on the timeline.

He doesn’t mind being there. The only reason he agreed to go was bc Sirius was going (and his friends) but Sirius was going and he knew for some unknown reason that he was going to dance.

Is also respectfully eyeing Barty up and down bc damn you cannot deny he looks fucking delectable.

Joins James in the corner to comfort him because he feels pity for the poor lad. He pats his back, while the other hand holds onto his phone/book.

He’s genuinely just chilling there. Not drinking, or being a pedo or something weird like that. My man might be chilling, and throw a couple dollars at Barty, Evan, Regulus, or whoever else is dancing. Everyone finds it hilarious when he stares and watches like he’s fucking STARVING, especially Barty, Evan, and Sirius.

OPTIONAL: Somehow, they manage to convince this man to dance. Well, he doesn’t really dance, he just gets a dance from literally everyone, but it’s still something! After Sirius finishes his lap dance, he thinks he made Remus the most turned on (he did, but shh). And then it’s Regulus’ turn, and Remus starts grinding back, and it’s hot and everyone’s cheering and whistling, and Sirius is projectile vomiting.

Peter Pettigrew:

Was nervous—and still is—about going to the strip club, but when he gets there he calms down a little bit. It’s not that bad, really.

Is the type of guy to be sitting all dainty and respectfully in the corner, back straighter than a needle, and helpfully pick up a clothing item and hand it over to the dancer. They either find this adorable, or weird.

Is peacefully drinking some alcohol, but not enough to make him drunk, just slightly tipsy. He’s those men that might throw money but when they do it’s one dollar bill or a coin.

Orders multiple drinks (and snacks, if there are any) from the bar and offers them to his friends. They all thank him for it and his generosity.

When they leave, everyone hugs him, or at least side hugs him (even the slytherins) because they all know he deserves it, and he really needs it.

OPTIONAL: His friends beg him to dance bc they reassure him it’d be hot, but he denies it all and says no bashfully. They decide to give him a break, and they move on to Lily. She’s also plus size, and she agrees to dance on stage. She strip teases and does a belly dance as best as she can, and everyone is screaming and supporting her, even Barty who tells her, “JESUS, NOT EVEN I CAN DANCE LIKE THAT!” Even though he damn well can, he’s just being very nice for once. Peter decides to give it a try, and when his friends all cheer him on and clap for him, he feels himself get a bit emotional. Lily hugs him afterwards.

Lily Evans:

Happily goes to the strip club like it’s a typical Tuesday. She’s definitely enjoying her time and cheering other girls on with Marlene and Mary.

She isn’t one for dancing, she’s just supporting her friends and throwing some money on the stages. She approaches other strippers and tells them that they looked wonderful.

My girl is rich. She’s over here giving these strippers 200 dollars. For each dance, if she can make it. She’d even pay them for a private lap dance or whatever, but Mary would also have to join. (She’d pay an extra 100)

Overall just having a good time. Steps outside for a bit because she gets overwhelmed when she spends a long time in there. Sometimes it’s too much for her to see handle.

Gets compliments by a lot of strippers (mostly females), about how her body is beautiful and even if she’s plus sized, she can still dance. They tell her to apply for a job here, and to try dancing out here because they’ve seen her dance a little bit just not on stage. She basically is getting harassed with compliments from the strippers and it feels good :).

OPTIONAL: She does eventually dance on stage (and apply for the job). It takes her a bit to collect her nerves and tell herself that she’ll be alright and it’s not embarrassing. She tells herself that she’s beautiful, and Mary chose her over anyone else. That James chased her for 5 whole years. That Pandora used to like her. It boosts her confidence and she managed to dance on the stage. The constant cheer of support from her friends (and her friends’ friends) makes her a bit emotional, but she tries to not let it show. Afterwards, she joins in on encouraging Peter to dance. When he finally does, she hugs him because she gets it.

Mary Macdonald:

When she steps into the club the first thing she does is ask if there’s a karaoke station. If there isn’t, then she goes to the bar. She was mainly asking for Marlene, but everyone knows she was also asking for herself.

Like Lily, was excited to come here for the first time because she’s never been. She also really likes supporting other females when they’re dancing because it’s hard to show off your body like that for people to openly judge.

She chose everyone’s outfits for the day. She made everyone call her or FaceTime her so she can choose their outfits or give them advice. Besides Barty. He gave her advice. All in all, everyone arrived to the strip club not knowing how their significant other looked like. Let’s just say the next week was…quite active for the couples.

Can you tell I love her rn?

Makes sure everyone is included. This is usually Lily’s and Pandora’s job but since they’re busy being drunk and dancing like lunatics, it’s her job now. She includes Peter in conversations, makes sure Remus isn’t just reading a book from the sidelines all day, makes sure that Evan isn’t jealously watching Barty grind on other men the whole night, etc. If this ever were to happen, let’s just say she would be down to help Evan make Barty jealous too.

OPTIONAL: Encourages everyone to drink and get wrecked. She claims that she’ll call an Uber, or she’ll drive everyone back home for a sleepover/to their individual houses for them. Just be their sober buddy. Most of everyone agrees, besides Remus. They both drive everyone home in separate cars. And just in case they start dozing off, they make sure to call each other on FaceTime and quietly talk until they arrived home while everyone else slept (and threw up) in the back.

Marlene Mckinnon:

My girl is ready to party istg. She decided to go all out today. Short shorts that literally show off half her ass, and a tight crop top without a bra on. People expected Dorcas to be very upset when seeing her, but surprisingly she was the one who supported her outfit the most.

When she sees other people walking up to one of her friends (usually the girls) or Dorcas, she will pull up and rock their shit. She’s defending her friends and causing a fucking scene and she’s devouring. No one’s stopping her not even the security because she’s terrifying when she’s angry (all thanks to Effie for teaching her that!)

Will drink any and every shot someone brings to the table. Is too lazy to go get some herself so she basically waits for the moment someone (usually Lily or Peter) brings over a tray of drinks. Even when she drinks all the shots/cups, she proceeds to drink everyone else’s. She is—of course—vomiting on the drive back home.

Doesn’t dance on stage surprisingly, but will give Dorcas a lap dance (or any of the girls a lap dance), only if someone else is doing it to their own partner or whoever the fuck. The group did expect her to be very into the whole experience but she was actually kind of containing herself and only being wild when someone else was (Barty and/or Sirius)

Chats with the security and workers there so she gets on their good side. Is definitely the type of person to forget her ID. She compliments the male security, and flirts (Dorcas gives consent) with the female security, so they let her in. She’s not ashamed, and Barty is proud of himself because he taught her that trick.

OPTIONAL: When she’s drunk out of her mind, there are moments where she mistakes others for Dorcas or her best friends. She’ll approach a stranger and start dancing up on them and then suddenly she’s being dragged away to the bathroom stalls and receives a slap in the face by Dorcas herself. Or, she’ll approach a random dude and hug him, taking a shot with him and doing a typical ‘let’s drink for..’ thinking it’s Barty/James, even though it’s really not and it causes James to finally laugh and let out some tension, and Barty to face palm with his hyena cackles.

Dorcas Meadows:

My girl is chilling. She chooses the table and takes a seat, drinking occasionally from her glass of alcohol. She watches whoever is dancing and claps for them at the end. If it’s someone she knows she throws them money.

Protects her friends like Marlene does, except she’s more quiet and intimidating. If she catches someone flirting with Pandora, she’ll step between them and with her tall body, glaring at them with her piercing eyes. They do in fact shit their pants!

It’s so hypnotizing to watch her because she’s just manspreading there, leaning back against the couch and swirling her glass of tequila in her hand, wearing a suit and dress pants, plus some dress shoes. She has her expensive watch on, and eyeliner + contour. She looks wealthy.

When she notices Marlene getting a bit too wrecked, she’s the first to stand up and tell everyone they’re leaving bc clearly her gf ain’t doing well. That’s why they’re usually always the first couple to go. “We’ll meet back at the house.” She says, because they did plan a sleepover (as usual) after all.

Allows her friends to do whatever they want (unless it’s something stupid, or if they’re in danger or uncomfortable). She doesn’t tolerate anyone approaching her friends, touching them, and if she finds out her friends are gonna have sex (sometimes Barty + Evan have a threesome or foursome (James and Regulus) but that’s besides the point) she makes sure they’re safe. She keeps protection in her bag. Her face is sometimes very emotionless so some of her friends go up to her and pinch/lick/bite/or even kiss her just so she wakes up. She doesn’t mind, it keeps the weirdos away.

OPTIONAL: If anything, she probably works as a security guard there, and mentally face palms when she sees her friends and Marlene because they don’t bring their ID’s and expect Dorcas to just let them in (which she does). She does enjoy Marlene flirting with her though! Barty and Evan try to do the same but she merely raises a stern brow until they cower, and then lets them enter with a heavy sigh. She definitely slaps their asses playfully as they make their way in.

Regulus Black:

Before coming inside he pulls Barty and Evan aside and tells them that this is the only night that he’ll allow them to flirt and touch up on James without Reg knowing. So they do. And James can’t even look them in the eye because it makes him even more nervous than he already is.

James loosens up over time (not when Rosekiller are being menaces), and continuously asks Reg why he isn’t a dancer there, and that he should apply, not knowing that Reggie dances there secretly. All his boyfriend does is wink with a tiny grin.

Some dude walks over to Reg and starts hitting on him. He gives him signs that he’s taken—and not just by one man—but this guy doesn’t seem to care. He begins to get uncomfortable, and doesn’t want to cause a scene and ruin the night for his friends. Luckily, James is there to save the day! He beats the shit out of that man without hesitation, and Barty + Evan join in. Maybe Pandora will, or Dorcas. It varies.

Sits down for a break and if Remus is next to him, he’ll read the book/his phone over his shoulder. Rem doesn’t mind. He likes Reggie’s company.

When Sirius gets on top of the table next to Barty (who looks like a whole buffet), and begins to strip and get naked, Regulus literally gags, proceeds to giggle a little, and then vomits outside, comes back in, sits down, and cackles. The process repeats.

OPTIONAL: He watches the way James is standing in the corner, his back being patted on by Remus. Regulus was the one who told Lupin to do that, because he felt bad for his boyfriend. Maybe they should go home, this isn’t James’ cup of tea. He starts to make his way over to the two of them, but suddenly Evan appears out of no where, and steals James. He’s confused, and stammering which is very obvious. His cheeks are red, and he gulps harshly when Ev sends him a flirty smirk. He looks away, there’s no point in watching when he already knows what’s going to happen.

Barty Crouch Jr:

He’s enjoying teasing James so much so that it is literally all he does. All night. He winks at him, grinds down on him, flirts with him, whatever. You name it, he does it. James is acting all cool and chill even though he’s collapsing inside. When Evan starts doing it too, that’s when he can’t handle it and he crumbles like a sand castle.

Takes shots with his friends, and isn’t as messed up like Marlene for some reason?? Probably because he’s a very heavy weight. Marlene and Dorcas are the first to leave, then it’s Remus and Sirius (Remus drags Siri out), and then it’s Pandora and Xeno, and finally Rosekiller.

Is dancing on the tiny stage/pole like his life depends on it. He knows he looks good. He knows his body is fucking hot. And he knows everyone is staring at him. The platform is littered with dollars and coins and whatever. His favorite thing are the roses that are thrown at him by Evan (somehow), because they’re literally roses from his rose, and the thorns lightly slice his skin.

He knows Evan is hesitant to do this whole flirty thing with James because it makes him nervous, but Barty begins to do it and it encourages Ev. He has no shame at all. At. All. James is shy and flustered in the crowd of people, and Barty is amused. Very amused. It’s like controlling a puppet with a lazy twist of a wrist.

Watching Sirius dance was hilarious. It was the best part of the night, besides watching it all over again with friends. You see, they did manage to record a bit throughout the experience, so they watched the videos on the TV all together. Him and Black falling over made them both hysterical to the point where everyone thought they were being sarcastic and dramatic.

OPTIONAL: Dorcas is cornering someone? He’s joining in. Regulus is uncomfortable? He’s gonna handle it. Evan is casting his eyes downwards for some reason? Barty will hunt the person who’s making him uncomfortable down. Pandora is being cat called on? Well, you’re about to get clawed in the eye. James is nervous and uncomfortable? I guess he’ll comfort him. As long as nobody speaks about any of this the next day. Seriously, don’t.

Evan Rosier:

Was expected to dance with Barty or something but he’s surprisingly sat down next to Dorcas and just silently watching Barty. That, or tackling half-red-and-dead James.

Converses with Remus and manages to tear him apart from his book for a little bit. Which is impressive to Sirius. They bond and afterwards they get along more and more until they’re close friends and they visit each other’s homes or smth.

When Barty told him what Regulus had said abt the whole James thing, he was nervous and a little bit hesitant to go through with it. He knew James is nervous at places like this, so he knew they’d have to release the tension somehow to not make him uncomfortable. Also, he’s new to the whole polyamorous thing, so he doesn’t know how to behave himself.

Eerily like Dorcas, he manspreads against the couch and does that thing where men ‘adjust their hips’. He has a glass of some type of drink in his hand. It varies since he drinks whatever his boyfriend(s) hand over to him.

He isn’t the first one to make a move at James, it’s Barty (and Reg)But whenever he does make a move, it’s more straightforward and it doesn’t take James a bit to understand and process what he just said, yk?

OPTIONAL: He dances once and only once, and it was because Dorcas had whispered in his ear about it. He knows how to dance, that isn’t the problem, he just chooses not to show off. Anyway, he does dance, and he serves, devours, and slurps up the crumbs. He knows his boyfriend(s) are watching so he flawlessly does his little movements and makes his way down, pulling his shirt back on. Bee = coming on the spot, Jamie = quite literally trembling like a dog in heat, Reggie = staring widely into his soul.

Pandora Rosier:

Was originally in charge of looking over everyone and making sure everyone was included in and having fun, but today she had decided to get wack ass high/drunk, so it was someone else’s job now.

Watching Lily dance was bittersweet because they haven’t talked for a while, and she’d always show off her new dance movements to Panda when they were dating. They’ve always avoided each other because it’s awkward and because they’re worried their partners wouldn’t like them conversing with each other.

She does talk to Lily when she says “fuck it”. They bond and Lily is surprisingly very quick to continue the conversation(s). She talks with Mary too, and they’re both very mature and they actually like each other a lot.

Gets approached by this weirdo when she’s walking to the bathrooms. She’s all alone and she doesn’t know how to reject their offers without causing a scene in a place like this. Her friends do notice though because of course they do, and she watches with pride as they mess that person up. Afterwards she scolds them with a smile on her face and no heat behind her words.

She would do this for her friends too. It’s a non-spoken agreement that if any one of them (or their partners) are getting harassed or are uncomfortable because of someone or something, and one of them bares witness, they must help. For example, let’s say some girl is offering to buy (an uncomfortable) Mars a drink, and Evan notices, he’s going to walk over to them and crush that girls face into her skull.

OPTIONAL: Secretly brings weed (and other drugs) with her. She didn’t buy it from anybody else, she got/made it herself. She sells it secretly, and actually gets a pretty decent amount of money. Barty wants some and he receives a slap on the cheek, and when Evan tells her he wants some, she punches him. Since she goes home before many of the others, she hands the job over to someone else that’s more mature about it (definitely not her brother or her soon-to-be brother-in-law), and counts the money at home. I mean, $340 ain’t that bad!

[doueverwonder]

alright, welcome to very specific guides to interacting with people;

So, you met someone who was in a cult. You found this out either through a serious conversation, or bc they dropped it in a conversation casually because they don't think about their words before they leave their mouth (<- me).

You can

Change the topic

politely ask if they want to talk about details

Do NOT

"Did they do [insert Hollywood trope (ie. blood sacrifice)]?"

"did you drink the kool-aid?"

get details and go "oh so it wasn't that bad a cult"

call it a 'good cult'

I had someone at work yesterday ask if we sacrificed children, if I drank the kool-aid and then call it a good cult, all that does is

A. make it so 'not as bad yet' cults can fly under the radar easier and fucking get to the Jonestown point.

B. negate anything serious the person is going to say; telling parents beating their kids is normal and public humiliation in front of thousands of people apparently aren't as bad after you've established there was no blood sacrifice.

C. calling a traumatic experience 'good' is an asshole move under any circumstance and can send the person into an anxiety or panic attack because you just dismissed what they went through <3

[cavillary]

life is a bit of a clusterfuck lately

1. i’m about to start my period

2. I almost rage quit my job as a preschool teacher 3 times last week (and more before that, there’s so many reasons why)

3. we’re in a recession and it’s literally impossible to find a job rn (hence why #2 didn’t happen)

4. my dog had to go to the emergency vet sunday afternoon, had emergency surgery yesterday, and $2000 later he came home today (I had almost a panic attack yesterday thinking about him dying)

5. its election night and quite possibly the last time i’ll ever vote in this country if DT is elected again (and even if he isn’t bc… you know… voter suppression and illegal tactics)

6. I live in a battleground state and receive between 30 and 50 texts a day about voting and huge partisan claims, on top of any commercials I hear on the radio or tv, and strangers knocking on my door to ask me to vote (I voted like 2 weeks ago). i’m politically exhausted and at the same time I educate everyone I can and literally fight with my family about politics but they’re fucking tr*mp supporters who swear he’s fixing the economy and the southern border.

7. I live in an area w low wages and high rent so even though I have two bachelors degrees and i’m a fucking certified teacher I literally cannot afford to MOVE OUT of my parents house bc there’s no cap on rent and they’re charging the first two months up front with a deposit AND a pet rent fee and I don’t know a person within a 30 mile radius can afford that. I have a real job, where you could afford to live on my wages 10-12 years ago and now it’s impossible. hell, even double my wages is iffy in this economy.

plus some other stuff that I don’t have the capacity to remember.

so i’m drinking more than I should, taking care of my dog, and not caring about my bedtime even tho I have to be up by 4 am to get ready for work.

to everyone who sees this, I love you and i’m keeping you in my thoughts and I hope life is being kind to you 💚 you deserve it

[shirtlessradfahrer]

warning cringe venting/rambling about stress and trip planning and hair under the cut

I had a total breakdown after work yesterday

like...dry heaving sobbing into my knees on the floor kind of breakdown

not about the hair…ok yes it was about the hair but not entirely, I've been stressed about a lot of things and the hair change was just what finally set the emotional bomb off

I've had a crapload of anxiety about my trip for weeks (which looking back now I've definitely been suppressing too much, and that was a mistake) bc it's my first time flying/traveling alone, and overseas to boot

Thinking about stuff like, will I forget some crucial papers/tickets/passwords etc and be unable to do fun stuff, will I have a panic attack on the flights despite my meds, will I have some freak accident and end up in hospital over there, will my cat still like me when I get back, will I fit in with enough of his other fans. Will i come back the same person or changed for the better, or for the worse...they all scare me equally.

And I worked my fucking ass off in order to be able to afford everything I'm going to do without going into a ton of debt. Which really did a fucking number on me mentally.....but for almost a year I've told myself it would all be worth it, bc I'd be overwhelmed with joy when I *finally* see that beautiful bowlcut boy in front of me, just as I was filled with joy when I first saw him peeking out of that box

I planned my trip under the loose assumption that the album would be out (or almost out) by this point and I'd be able to celebrate that with people. I got even more excited for this after Böle bc I figured that was the template for everything going forward, and I loved everything I saw-I loved the staging, I loved the new songs, I loved his outfit, I loved the almost bird-esque styling he was doing with the front of the bowlcut

But now....I don't know what the actual fuck he's doing.

I'll be on the (first) plane in a little less than 48 hours and I just feel like the universe is playing some sick joke on me - in less than a week he's gone from someone I would abandon feminism for (I joke) to Some Guy I would be actively avoiding at public events (based on a few unfortunate past experiences with individuals who resembled this, not entirely a joke). Not his fault, I know, and nothing to do with his actual personality of course, which I’m *well aware* is lovely. But that's my reality 🤷🏻‍♀️ and it’s incredibly jarring and not in a good way, and sure as hell not at a good time

And as I said it’s not just about the hair, I feel sick thinking about how much time and money and effort I've put into planning things - esp. gig outfits which I was basing off of the purple/green suit.....and I don't even know if there was any point to that now, bc is he even going to wear it? Again, not specifically *his* fault. But I’m miffed, to say the least.

It feels so incredibly rare these days that I can share a deeply passionate long-term interest with others. I feel like this whole...thing has been a perfect example of how much I struggle with FOMO....with feeling like I'm always left behind. And even when I try my hardest to catch up I can never quite make it before people have moved on to something different.

I know my reaction seems way over-dramatic to some but I just gently ask that you imagine how I feel watching countless people essentially drop by Finland on their free weekends or time off to see him once, or twice, or three times, or five times, or twenty freaking times over the past year, while I’ve had to move heaven and earth for the chance to see him even once (and I'm not trying to generalize, I know for various reasons a lot of you have also been unable to see him still, and I really hope that changes soon <3 especially if you *do* like this look)

The point is that I just wanted to experience the “classic” Kä ONCE! I didn't even plan on going to multiple shows until it became a thing for Summer Camp!! Just ONCE! He could copy the Daltons and go bald after that for all I care!!

He's 100% allowed to style himself however he wants - if I weren't in the *very particular situation* I'm in I'm sure I would be more open to the change although I still hate this particular shade of blonde and think there are much better options but whatever.But I’m allowed to be disappointed when I’ve spent literal thousands of dollars-and will be spending more-to make seeing him a reality. I've had so much bad luck and bad timing already this year and this just took the freaking cake. And again that's not *his* fault, I know. But fuck, am I sad. I just wanted something, anything to go according to plan for me this year.

I know I'll still have a great time - I'm excited to meet and hang out with everyone, and I'm excited to do touristy things and I’m still excited for all the great music I’m going to hear. I'm just venting now bc I don't want to be such a downer when I meet everyone in person.

....now watch me completely clown myself if this really is just for Traffic and he goes back to black in a couple weeks - and I will so very happily wear that clown suit lmao, you can all buy me one if you find one

[hornsbeforehalos]

For those of you still around and following me on this hellspace of a website, I would like to tell you another story. One that I will actually finish this time.

I joined tumblr back in 2017, in the middle of a trash marriage, dying everyday a little bit at a time.

I found a “home” in both the supernatural and the walking dead fandoms. I engorged myself within these universes- as it was the only place I felt safe.

I found a daryl Dixon fanfiction writer that will not be named bc she’s since been found to be a trash human, but god damn did I love her work at the time. So much that I even helped her write a whole series then even wrote a crack fanfiction of it myself. During that time, she introduced me to one of her friends who wrote as well.

That friend was @coffee-obsessed-writer. (Or DragonGirl420 as she was known at the time)

I first fell in love with her writing, her daryl stories inspiring me to write my own (Hunter and Arrow) and then her feed back and love for Anytime Sweetheart cemented our friendship.

We talked everyday. All day. About everything.

She was the first person I told when my mother died. I texted her otw to the hospital before I got the news, and right after.

I texted her when I thought about killing myself.

She’s saved my life multiple times.

In 2019 I finally got the chance to visit her. I flew to Pennsylvania and she picked me and my son up from the airport for 2 days there before driving me to meet my mother in law.

In those two days, my child fell in love with her, and her children with me. And our children together. Me and my son got to see our first wild bear, in her front yard. We broke her now ex husbands meat tenderizer, and destroyed one of her kitchen towels trying to get a geode open. (I still owe her exhusband a meat tenderizer) We found out that her property is in fact, not the Kennedy compound, even tho it can act like it sometimes.

She called me when her husband left her.

I called her when I left mine.

I ran to her to get away from him. I spent two weeks with her in the start of the pandemic. I felt like I was at home the entire time. (Even with the drama lol)

Then when I got back to Texas, I texted her that I was hanging out with my boss. The one I had a crush on. She encouraged me to do what needed to be done to secure that man

And secure that man I did.

In October of last year he proposed.

Last week I married him.

Guess who I had to have by my side?

Guess who designed my bridesmaid proposals? My wedding invitations?

Guess who drove almost 24 hours to help me prepare for it? Who watched me literally realize I was getting married the next day and hugged me through a mini panic attack?

@coffee-obsessed-writer

The random bestfriend I met on tumblr that I wouldn’t be who I am today without.

[je-brille-dans-la-nuit]

Watching TOS: back to fun & Spirk

The Galileo Seven: loved it!

Much tension very drama

Really liked the difficulties of Spock in command. I thought it was interesting to see him in such a tense context on an inhospitable planet. He's not the leader Jim is, but it's clear the men's behavior also come from them being prejudiced against him bc of his Vulcan nature

Spock still analyzing while they're being attacked is hilarious

This exchange i cackled

SCOTT: Mister Spock, you said a while ago that there were always alternatives. SPOCK: Did l? I may have been mistaken. MCCOY: Well, at least I lived long enough to hear that.

"No one out there to see it" Except!! Of course the Enterprise is still here!!

"Captain, transporter room just beamed up five persons. Alive and well." The relief on Jim's face is not his usual big smile and it gets to me

The whole ending scene had me clutching my heart I loved it okay! The happy ending we deserve!

Jim "You mean you reasoned that it was time for an emotional outburst" all the while leaning way closer than is necessary!!

KIRK: Mister Spock, you're a stubborn man. SPOCK: Yes, sir. EVERYONE LAUGHING ♥

.

The Squire of Gothos

It's fun!

Jim is good at handling people!

SPOCK: I object to you. I object to intellect without discipline. I object to power without constructive purpose.

Spock being his little shit self gives me life. Besides, when he says that, we have a close-up on Jim smiling lovingly! This only happens when Spock speaks! This is on purpose! I see you!

The fact that Trelane, to get Jim to do what he wants, threatens Spock of all crewmembers. I mean.

The ending was funny!

.

Arena

"Nevermind about me, protect my ship" smh

Spock calling him 'Jim' instead of 'captain' or 'sir' when he's trying hard to get through to him, to make him listen

The sounds the Gorn makes were really getting on my nerves argh

Spock's live-comment ("Good. Good") on the fight

I liked the message of the episode! Hopeful ending! He wins by being merciful!

Jim you could just tell Spock he was right about not killing them

.

Tomorrow is yesterday

Not bad but pretty unremarkable except for:

CHRISTOPHER: I never have believed in little green men. SPOCK: Neither have I.

krrkrrkrr

Jim playing dumb in front of the soldiers was hilarious

What was that? What was what?

Believe me, Colonel, you wouldn't believe me

.

Court martial

I liked it enough, although it's a pity it's never really about what Jim may have done wrong. As viewers we never doubt he didn't do it.

Look, I'm an easy girl, it doesn't take much to make me happy and Spock saying

It is impossible for Captain Kirk to act out of malice or panic. It is not in his nature.

is enough for me. That and Spock and Bones working together to save Kirk's ass, again.

JIM: And nothing is more important than my ship.

He means Spirk right?

Who knows? You may be able to beat your next captain at chess.

Cute

[baflegacy]

21, 22, 23, 24 for the ask game? :)

aahh tysm!!

21.) Share your favorite piece of dialogue

this part from lmtbgs is a personal fave 😁 i just think it was incredibly silly to have them spell out what they wanna do and Still Not Really Getting It

“Well, I mean—i-it looked like you were having a good time and—and I hate to be the one to leave you high and dry, so.” Amanda’s face reddens. (Oh my god, what the fuck is she saying— ) “Maybe I could…help. Help you. Help you with your problem.”

The shorter of the two gapes at her, and now Amanda feels like she’s the one who’s gonna go into a panic attack until Angela speaks up. “You want…to help me. Get my rockers off.” She says slowly. “After hearing me have a wet dream about you.”

Amanda shrugs. “Looked like it was a good dream.”

22.) Share an excerpt from your favorite scene

this one from close my eyes is. Yeah.

Angela can see it so clearly that it feels like it's a movie playing in front of her: them, living together, in some busy area in Downtown LA. Amanda will make her a cup of tea during a hectic Friday night and she’ll complain that she wanted a coffee, babe, but she’ll still kiss the underside of Amanda’s jaw as she’s handed the mug, puffs of hot chamomile and lavender wafting between them. She’ll curl around Amanda at two in the morning and vehemently deny it when teased by the other woman, but she knows the next night they sleep Amanda will be the one to tuck her head in the crook of Angela’s neck. The taller of the two will complain about the leaky faucet in the bathroom every couple of days to the point where Angela’s ‘forced’ to borrow a toolbox from Damien to try and fix it, and once Amanda spots her playing handyman, eyes dark and hungry, she’ll have no choice but to get pulled into their bedroom.

23.) Share the final version of a sentence or paragraph you struggled with. What about it was challenging? Are you happy with how it turned out?

this part from it’s a risk was a hard one bc i wasnt sure how to end the fic, but i Did want to write them switching clothes as a way to let chanse know they hooked up!

“Why’s everyone shouting alrea—oh, hey.” She hears Amanda say. She turns around, both of their faces red. She notices Amanda wearing her flannel, just small enough on her to barely cover the hickey on her collarbone.

“Fuck.” Amanda winces, once she sees what’s Angela wearing. “That’s my jacket, isn’t it.”

24.) What's something that surprised you while you were working on a fic? Did it change the story?

delores’ backstory in your love is tough was the most surprising because i already had some vague idea of what was gonna be her backstory and then BOOM it was similar to her actual backstory in the flashback/dream ep in sword af 😭 i wasnt Exactly right but i was close so i had to change it up a bit so it would fit with the backstory that was canon!

send some fic writer asks!

[anawkwardlady]

Oh, forgot the confessions were going on. Is it still going on? /gen

Once I asked an astronaut guy (he was from Apollo number idek.. wasn’t paying attention but if I Google him I’m able to recognise him. He’s the only one still alive) who’d been giving a speech how old he was (having panicked because he pointed at me and told me to ask him a question and then his assistant handed me a microphone) when he was asking for people to ask him things

(it was for a primary school school-trip years and years ago .. several schools had gone do you can imagine that those present in the theatre where he’s giving his life story are in the hundreds, or very close to being)

It doesn’t seem like much but I was mortified. Especially as the room went silent (yes, that is true, actually happened, and he was like “uh .. no” and asked someone else. Think he actually cut the q&a section short after that? But that might be wrong and my perception of time was just warped bc of my immense anxiety afterwards).

And as such for the longest time whenever I’d think of space in general (with him being an astronaut n all that) I had like weird mini panic/stress attacks. Just the mention of the subject would get me a bit freaked out.

I’m better with it now, and the guy probably doesn’t even remember it being like nearly a hundred or something, but dude. The closure I will feel when I one day Google him and find out he died will .. probably not be worth the whole anticipation.

Everything aside I do hope he’s doing well, especially for his age. But my celebration is just one sociopathic Google search away.

I mean im never refusing some !

Oh noooo

Tbh, I'm pretty certain he thought you were a really shy person and pretty young and awkward and never thought about this again. Also anyone else hearing this exchange probably wouldn't retrace it from you and probably forgot the question after. Tbh I think its weird to point at random people and tell them to ask you a question instead of just, giving the mic to people who are raising their hand ? I understand why its panic inducing tho, I glad you're better with it !

If it can help you feel better, I also had a little awkward moment with someone somehow famous, even if it wasn't in front of a lot of people. I was in a writing club in school years ago and without warning us they invited a famous writer to one of our session. And it was SO awkward because first of all, none of us read his work, second of all, he didn't understand it was to write with us and not a Q&A (and he was a really eccentric guy not really holding his tongue so we had a lot of awkward moments) and finally he gave us a theme, we all made something with it and read it to him (you read it out loud and all). And I was the only one he criticized and held on for long, I used a word he thought was not the right word to used and he wasn't leaving me alone with this. Gave everyone else compliments. Thats it. I guess we all had weird encounters.

[cure-icy-writes]

I posted 1,735 times in 2022

That's 885 more posts than 2021!

164 posts created (9%)

1,571 posts reblogged (91%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@dino--draws

@ofstormsandfire

@milstev

@kayuripax

@stormcloudsandshadows

I tagged 1,064 of my posts in 2022

Only 39% of my posts had no tags

#disability - 78 posts

#adulting tag - 29 posts

#pokemon - 25 posts

#ask game - 19 posts

#re: prev tags - 18 posts

#bryelle chihiro - 17 posts

#fall into flying - 15 posts

#pokemon legends arceus - 12 posts

#personal - 11 posts

#answered asks - 11 posts

Longest Tag: 140 characters

#trying again one more time except this time the kids on the online playground sit crosslegged in front of you and listen with rapt attention

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

pokemon in mental health

gonna dump some worldbuilding headcanons on tumblr bc sharing is caring

“Therapy pokemon“ is a vague term and the one most commonly used, but can refer to either personal support pokemon, or therapeutic assistance pokemon. Personal support pokemon are pokemon who assist their trainer exclusively, and require a bit of paperwork as well as confirmation from a healthcare professional, but this is pretty easy to set up. Often, these pokemon assist with anxiety disorders, poor balance, executive dysfunction, time blindness, and other assorted conditions. They tend to be smaller in size, and are permitted in situations where pokemon are normally restricted unless it becomes a safety concern.

Personal support pokemon don’t require a clear diagnosis so much as confirmation of symptoms. If someone experiences chronic pain and isn’t sure why, they can still get permission for assistance. These pokemon often wear vests to signify that they’re working, but not always. In general, asking to pet or touch these pokemon is looked down upon unless you’re close to the trainer, although introducing yourself to the pokemon and offering a hand to sniff is a common courtesy.

Therapeutic Assistance Pokemon, on the other hand, require quite a bit of training. These pokemon must get their official certifications, and are trained for tasks such as:

how to help a human through a panic attack 

how to signal for help 

how to communicate to emergency responders through a specific code the state of the human 

how to de-escalate violent situations 

how to guide a human who is dissociating to a safe place

Therapeutic Assistance Pokemon are very common in mental healthcare facilities, the foster system, large companies in certain sections of HR, hospitals, and schools during finals week/after any kind of tragedy affecting the student population such as a death. They're also deployed in the wake of natural disasters.

common therapeutic assistance pokemon might include: 

lillipup. lil dog, very easy to train, friendly, sensitive to changes in environment 

riolu, although they're more often deployed in more high intensity situations. almost all of them carry an everstone 

sylveon, since according to the pokedex they can use their ribbons to help calm people down

vulpix/fennekin, fluffy and warm. 

alomomola-- more common in hospital settings, and tend to work in shifts because pokemon have emotional needs as well. honestly, highly empathetic pokemon are more prone to burnout than others. same goes for the chansey line and audino 

eevee. always in demand for trainers, not all of these little guys are cut out for battling, and breeding/raising programs for eevee tend to sort the young by career paths of battler/non-battler depending on the preferences that the pokemon has shown. 

Therapeutic assistance pokemon must have a handler, often with a ratio of multiple pokemon to a single handler.

213 notes - Posted February 14, 2022

#4

things i’ve learned about hyperacusis, because the medical system is frankly SHIT

And frankly, I’d rather my experience help someone else who needs it. This isn’t universal or exhaustive, just something that I wanted to share. Anyone can reblog or add on, but don’t clown.

Hyperacusis is a neurological disorder characterized by extreme sensitivity to sound, and it’s a fucking bitch to deal with. I’ve had it for two years, and only recently got a diagnosis. In my case, I’m fairly certain it was caused by a combination of existing ADHD/sensory issues and the slowly building stress of high school, which is an entirely different can of worms that I still occasionally have vague nightmares about.

It’s hard to cope with, and largely not understood by the public.

You’re going to get some judgement from older folks about being “antisocial” for wearing headphones and avoiding crowds, especially if you’re younger. This is the equivalent of a squirrel encouraging a fish to be more outgoing when the fish is literally struggling to breathe and taking refuge in its bowl of water.

Earplugs will be your best friend. Don’t listen to audiologists who tell you that it’s the worst thing you can ever do to your hearing; the medical system is largely unsympathetic to your actual needs. Get them in bulk, and use them as needed. Silence is bad for your ears, yes, but damaging them with noise is even worse. Earplugs combined with over-the-ear headphones playing music is a good compromise.

Seriously. Stock the fuck up on these lil bitches. Put ‘em in an altoids tin and never leave the house without some. And don’t forget to use clean ones; these are disposable for a reason. If you store them in a dirty place, you’ll end up with an ear infection.

You may need accommodations, but that doesn’t make you any lesser of a person. Start looking around cripplepunk* spaces for confidence. Own your disability. You deserve to live just as much as anyone else, and you deserve to be happy. Accessibility may not be universal, but it sure isn’t optional either. You are worth more than what you can contribute to society.

If possible, an audiologist can help you get custom made earplugs to filter out sound equally. These let you reduce volume at all frequencies, as opposed to the foam earplugs which muffle sound.

Earplugs designed for musicians and autistic folks are also good options; ideally, you want to have something of a variety of hearing protection. Too much or too little will only make things worse. Find what works for you and allows you to function and heal. Active noise cancelling is also an option.

Lifestyle changes won’t fix the problem and you should be skeptical of anyone who says they will, but they’re also not something to be overlooked. Sound dampening panels can be expensive, but keeping soft things in your room can improve the sound absorption. For me, having a rather large fabric stash is an excellent solution, but plushies and hanging quilts are also reasonable. Reducing stress can help, too-- start setting some healthy and reasonable boundaries. Force yourself to view your distress as rational and justified, rather than something to push through.

Tinnitus Retraining Therapy is the main method used in treating hyperacusis, but this...can vary. In my experience, audiologists are unsympathetic shitheads about this, and can veer into victim blaming, so take it with a grain of salt and keep your own limitations in mind. It works on a similar principle as exposure therapy, rewiring the brain in order to break down the association between “noise = bad” and helping you become accustomed to normal levels of auditory processing. Never force yourself to do this if it causes you distress; take it at your own pace. Forcing yourself will only strengthen the associations created, and make things worse for you. Imagine your brain as a scared cat in a new house; give it space, then introduce new stimuli as needed. Tinnitus retraining therapy is not punishment. You don’t need to punish yourself for having this disorder, even if you think that’ll make it go away faster.

You deserve patience and love.

*cripplepunk, sometimes censored as c-punk, is a movement similar to disabled pride that centers the needs and lives of disabled folks over the convenience of the abled population. Not everyone is comfortable with reclaiming the word “cripple” and it should be used with discretion. Be wary of physical/mental separatism in disability.

Anyways, I think that’s all for now! I may add on more later, but I hope this helps.

267 notes - Posted April 6, 2022

#3

Tired of the submas angst?

After some consideration, I’d like to propose an event dedicated to content of the twins being autistic and happy. Much of the information is subject to change, and help spreading the word and organizing the event would be greatly appreciated. With that being said, here’s a basic outline to serve as an interest check. Feedback and reblogs would be greatly appreciated! 

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bL-cK_3-ycAdoxTt8VVx2fmGc2WmMfO6CQsbaUSwaeA/edit?usp=sharing 

318 notes - Posted June 14, 2022

#2

See the full post

501 notes - Posted May 5, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

i love writing the pokemon world as just. socialist utopia where pokemon training is sort of like pet ownership, battling is good enrichment, and the government is pretty nonviolent. free healthcare and minimal police, because people just take care of each other

and also every couple years, a feral ten year old will team up with a god and take down some terrorists. this is just a thing that happens and everyone has come to accept it as normal. ten year olds have no fear and no filter, and a strong sense of justice

919 notes - Posted July 15, 2022

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