#I NEED need need to not work 5 nights a week
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
i love you, in every time ࿐‧₊ 1974 - ...but it was never meant to be
chapter summary: You and Logan have been living in the Canadian Rockies for almost 6 months, enjoying the peace and solitude that comes with it.
word count: 8.9k+
pairing: Logan Howlett x fem!reader
notes: this is just fluff, at least until the end... but we're finally hitting the movies! and sorry for it being a bit shorter than the others, there are some ideas i'm saving for a future chapter :))
(p.s. the first sentence about the hotel in nyc is going to be very important to remember for a future chapter...)
warnings/tags: fluff, origins!logan, smut, oral (f!receiving), unprotected piv, creampie, (beginning of) x-men origins, character death
series masterlist - chapter 5 → chapter 7
Leaving was easy once you got past the one incident. You and Logan had stopped that day at a hotel a bit out of New York City only to be found by your father’s men.
But what happened was almost like magic. Logan, your Logan, took them all out with claws. At first you were bewildered, shocked at what you just saw. But now, after 6 months of living in the Canadian Rockies, it was normal.
Normal.
Mornings would start with the soft light streaming through the windows, casting a warm glow over your shared space as Logan brewed coffee and you stretched, enjoying the easy comfort of it all.
Logan had found work quickly enough as a lumberjack, something that kept him outside and busy, and it suited him. Meanwhile, you’d stumbled upon a small animal shelter in the nearby town. You’d started going once or twice a week, helping out with the dogs and occasionally picking up shifts to keep yourself busy and connected to some semblance of normal life.
The routines you fell into together were quiet, steady, and for the first time in a long while, you felt grounded. Though you missed New York sometimes, especially the volunteer work at the retirement home, the silence of the woods and the small town was a peaceful change.
Not only were things peaceful, but Logan had started opening up to you in the quiet of your cabin, usually in the early morning or after one of his nightmares. It started with little things—details about his mutation, his healing ability. Then, as the days blurred into weeks, he told you about his age and the wars he’d fought in, his voice quiet, words weighed down with old memories.
One chilly morning, you found him staring out the window, his gaze distant as he sipped his coffee. You moved up beside him, nudging his shoulder with yours. “Hey, you alright?”
He looked down at you, a flicker of a smile breaking through the shadows. “Yeah. Just… thinkin’,” he murmured, his voice rough but calm.
“Anything you want to talk about?” you offered, watching his face closely.
Logan considered this for a moment, then took a long breath. “I think… just realizin’ how long it’s been since I had somethin’ like this,” he finally admitted, a glint of honesty in his eyes. “It’s been a hell of a road, darlin’.”
You reached out, resting your hand on his forearm. “I don’t need to know everything, Logan. I’m just glad you’re here now.”
He gave a short nod, letting his hand rest over yours, a simple gesture that spoke volumes. He didn’t say anything, but his fingers wrapped around yours, holding them a moment longer than necessary.
---
Life in the cabin wasn’t extravagant, but there was a certain charm in the simplicity. Nights spent by the fire, mornings with the scent of pine and fresh coffee, and the comforting weight of Logan’s arm draped over you as you both drifted into sleep. But there were also the little bumps—like the time you tried making him dinner.
It had been a stew recipe, something you thought would be foolproof. You’d stirred, added spices, tasted… but when you served it, the look on Logan’s face was priceless.
He took a spoonful, eyebrows lifting as he held back a chuckle. “This a new recipe?”
“Okay, I get it—it’s not great,” you sighed, laughing a little as you took a bite yourself. “Alright, yeah, maybe it’s terrible.”
Logan chuckled, setting his spoon down. “It’s not so bad. I mean… it’s got heart.”
You nudged him, rolling your eyes. “Heart doesn’t mean it’s edible, Logan.”
“Maybe not,” he smirked, “but I’ll still eat it.” He winked, lifting another spoonful as he pretended to struggle through the bowl, making you burst into laughter.
---
Late one night, Logan awoke from one of his nightmares. You knew, even before he’d fully come to, just by the way he stiffened beside you. He sat up, rubbing a hand over his face, and you reached out, fingers brushing his shoulder.
“Do you want to talk about it?” you whispered.
He looked down at you, the muscles in his jaw tight. But after a moment, he nodded. “It was a long time ago. Just old ghosts.” He paused, exhaling heavily. “There’s been a lot of violence. Stuff… I don’t ever want you to have to see.”
“I know you’ve seen a lot,” you murmured, giving his arm a reassuring squeeze. “But you don’t have to go through it alone, Logan. Not anymore.”
Logan’s hand covered yours, and he turned his head just enough to meet your gaze, his eyes soft but searching. “You’ve been more than I deserve, Y/N,” he said quietly.
Your heart twisted, and you reached up to cup his face. “Logan, I don’t care what you’ve done or where you’ve been. All that matters is who you are now.”
He leaned into your touch, closing his eyes. “Then I’m one lucky man,” he whispered, his voice low.
He held you close that night, your presence calming the echoes of a past that seemed finally willing to rest, if only for a while.
---
One day you were trying to make something simple, roast chicken and potatoes before Logan got back from work. You diligently checked the oven, making sure that nothing was burning, until Logan came home, wrapping his arms around your waist as you stood up from the oven.
Logan’s hands settled warmly around your waist, his chin resting on your shoulder as he looked over at the oven. The familiar, steady weight of him grounded you, even as you felt your heart give a quick little skip at the simple, domestic gesture.
“Smells good in here,” he murmured, his breath brushing your ear as he took in the scent of roasting chicken and herbs. “Didn’t know you were this fancy in the kitchen.”
You let out a small laugh, shrugging one shoulder. “Fancy might be a stretch. I’m just hoping it doesn’t come out dry.”
His arms tightened just a bit, pulling you closer. “Even if it did, I’d still eat it,” he said, a hint of that playful glint in his voice. “Means a lot, havin’ you here. Feels like… home.”
A warmth rose in your chest, one that went beyond the physical, and you leaned back into him, a smile tugging at your lips. “You know, I could get used to this too.” You tilted your head, meeting his gaze. “Long days, quiet dinners, just us.”
“Us,” he echoed, his voice softer, thoughtful. There was a flicker of something deeper in his eyes, something unspoken yet weighty. His thumb brushed small, slow circles along your hip, as if anchoring himself in the moment, and he gave you a slight smile that didn’t quite mask the intensity behind it.
Logan was quiet for a moment, and you felt a shift in his posture, almost like he wanted to say something but was holding back. He looked at you in that way he sometimes did—like he was seeing more than just you standing there in your small, cozy kitchen. Maybe he was seeing all the days stretching ahead, those simple moments you’d have together, and the weight of that left him speechless.
“Logan?” you asked, brushing a hand along his arm.
He blinked, then smiled, the intensity in his gaze easing back into something gentler. “Nothin’. Just thinkin’ how lucky I am.”
You laughed softly, leaning your head against his shoulder. “Guess that makes two of us.”
The kitchen fell into a comfortable silence, with just the faint hum of the oven and the quiet, steady beat of Logan’s heart against your back. In the quiet of your little life together, things felt simple, natural. Here, there were no expectations, no obligations—just the two of you, building something real out of those little, ordinary moments.
But later that night, as you drifted off beside him, Logan stayed awake, lost in thought. His hand brushed over the small velvet box in his drawer, the ring that had waited all this time, the one that had been meant for you once before. He ran his thumb along the edge, thinking about when the right time might be—or if he’d even have the chance. For now, though, he’d savor each day, each quiet moment, holding on as tightly as he could.
---
You lay nestled between Logan’s legs on the couch, your head resting comfortably on his chest as you read, while he watched TV, idly sipping his beer. His free hand drifted up and down your arm absentmindedly, and you could feel the faint rumble of his quiet breaths beneath you. There was a calm in the cabin tonight—a peace you’d found only since being with him.
“What’s got you so hooked?” he asked, glancing down at your book with a smirk. “Looks like you’re deep in it.”
You tilted the book so he could see the cover, Jaws. “It’s a book about a shark.”
Logan raised an eyebrow, “a shark, huh?”
You turned back to the book, keeping a small smile hidden. “Kind of. It’s a little deeper than just a shark, though.”
“Deeper than a shark, huh?” Logan smirked, shifting slightly to glance down at you, looking mildly amused. “Didn’t think a fish story could be that interesting.”
“It’s not just any fish, Logan,” you said, letting your hand rest on his as you settled back into his warmth. “This shark’s on a whole other level—a menace, basically unstoppable. And there’s all this tension between the people in the town, like who’s responsible, what to do, whether they even believe it’s happening.”
He gave a soft grunt of understanding, taking a sip of his beer. “Guess I can see why you’re hooked. Townsfolk fighting over a monster they can’t get rid of… kinda familiar.”
You tilted your head to look up at him, a glint of curiosity in your eyes. “You got experience with monsters, Logan?”
“More than you’d believe, darlin’,” he murmured, his eyes holding that far-off look he sometimes got when his mind slipped somewhere else, somewhere harder. But his grip on you stayed gentle, grounding him here.
There was a moment’s quiet, then he smirked, leaning down closer. “But I could take out your shark, no question.”
“Oh, really?” you teased, closing the book and giving him a look of mock skepticism. “A great white shark, Logan. One that can bite clean through a boat. I think even you’d have some trouble with that one.”
He snorted, giving you an exaggerated look of disbelief. “I’m tellin’ ya, I’d have it done in five minutes.”
You laughed, poking his chest. “I’d like to see that. You, in the water, with a shark. You’d probably scare it off.”
“Probably,” he chuckled, his tone playful but carrying a hint of something genuine. “But I’d do it for you.”
His words caught you off guard, softening the teasing banter into something warmer, something real. You looked up at him, and the light in his eyes held a familiar steadiness, a promise you hadn’t expected. You felt a smile creeping up, one that made your heart beat a little faster.
“That’s sweet of you, Logan. But don’t go risking your life over a shark.”
He shrugged, giving a small grin. “Risking my life’s kinda my thing.”
With a smirk, you shifted to put your arms around his neck. “I don’t need you to fight any sharks. I just need you here, safe, preferably not trying to tackle any more sea monsters.”
Logan’s hands came up to cradle your face, his thumb brushing along your cheek. “Don’t worry, darlin’. For you, I’d stay outta trouble… or at least, try.”
Your breath caught as he leaned in, his lips brushing yours softly. You melted into him, feeling the solid warmth of him beneath you, the steady beat of his heart, a promise in every kiss, every touch.
When you pulled back, he let out a small sigh, looking at you with a softness that made you feel as though you were the only person in the world.
“Now,” you murmured, your voice quiet as you tried to keep the mood light, “how about you let me finish reading this book before you start making any plans to fight sharks?”
“Fine,” he chuckled, leaning back into the couch, his arms still loosely around you. “But I’m just sayin’, the offer stands.”
You rolled your eyes, shifting back to lean against his chest, your book in hand. But even as you returned to the words on the page, the comfortable silence between you filled every corner of the cabin, your heart warmed by the man beside you.
---
When Logan came home and removed his jacket, the sound of music drifted to his ears, mingling with the low hum of a vacuum. The cabin was warm, a sharp contrast to the biting chill outside, the smell of pine and faint wood smoke greeting him like an old friend. The soft glow of late afternoon sun streaked through the windows, and as he stepped further in, he caught sight of you.
You were standing in the middle of the room, barefoot, wearing one of his old flannels that hung loose on your frame, the hem brushing just below the tops of your thighs. The vacuum roared in your hand as you cleaned, entirely oblivious to his arrival.
Logan leaned against the doorframe, arms crossed, a faint smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth as he watched you. Something about this—a simple domestic scene—made his chest tighten, a warmth blooming there that he couldn’t quite name.
“Y’know, you’re not supposed to wear clothes that fit me better than they fit you,” he drawled, his voice cutting through the vacuum’s roar.
Startled, you turned it off with a quick flick of the switch and looked up, a sheepish smile spreading across your face. “Logan! You scared me,” you said.
“Didn’t mean to,” he replied, his tone warm as he pushed off the frame and walked toward you. His boots thudded softly against the wooden floor, and as he got closer, his eyes drank you in, lingering on the way the flannel gaped slightly at the neck, exposing the soft line of your collarbone. “Got a habit of sneakin’ up, I guess.”
You laughed softly, setting the vacuum aside. “If you were a little less loud, I’d think you were some kind of predator.”
“Oh, darlin’,” he said, his grin spreading as he reached for you, hands settling at your waist and pulling you close, “if I wanted to catch you, you wouldn’t stand a chance.”
Your breath hitched as his words settled between you, his voice a low rumble that always managed to make your knees feel just a little weaker. You placed your hands on his chest, feeling the solidness of him beneath your palms. “Good thing I’m not running then,” you murmured, tilting your head up to meet his eyes.
He leaned down, his nose brushing yours. “Good thing,” he echoed, before his lips claimed yours in a slow, deliberate kiss. His hands slid lower, fingers splaying over the curve of your hips, pulling you tighter against him. The flannel you wore rose slightly under his touch, and you gasped softly into his mouth as his fingers found bare skin.
“Logan,” you breathed against his lips, your voice a soft plea.
“Yeah?” he rasped, his mouth trailing down your jawline, his scruff brushing your skin in a way that sent shivers racing down your spine.
“Think you should let me finish cleaning,” you teased, though your hands had already slid up to wrap around his neck, fingers threading through the dark strands at the base of his skull.
He huffed a laugh, his teeth grazing the delicate line of your throat. “Nah, think I got a better idea.”
With a swift move, he bent and swept you off your feet, one arm under your knees, the other supporting your back. You let out a startled laugh, clinging to him as he carried you toward the couch. “Logan, the vacuum—”
“Vacuum’ll be there later,” he cut in, his voice gruff but tinged with amusement. “Right now, you’re the only thing I’m worried about.”
He set you down gently on the cushions, his large frame hovering over you as he knelt on the floor, his hands sliding up your thighs, pushing the flannel higher. The intensity in his gaze sent a flush rising to your cheeks, your heart pounding in anticipation.
“Been thinkin’ about you all day,” he admitted, his voice thick, raw. His hands paused, fingers curling just under the hem of the shirt. “Mind if I show you how much?”
You nodded, breathless, and he smiled—a rare, almost boyish expression that quickly dissolved into something darker, hungrier. He leaned down, capturing your lips in a kiss that left no room for doubt about where his mind was. His hands roamed freely now, skimming along the curve of your thighs, pushing the flannel higher and higher, exposing bare skin to the cool air of the room.
“Goddamn,” Logan muttered against your lips, his voice thick, raw. His hands splayed across your thighs, gripping them as though grounding himself, his thumbs brushing along the tender skin there. “You’re a fuckin’ dream, darlin’.”
A shiver ran through you, anticipation building as his kisses trailed lower, down your jaw, your neck, leaving a path of warm, open-mouthed caresses. You gasped softly, your hands tangling in his hair as he moved further down, sinking to his knees before you, his broad shoulders nudging your legs apart.
"Logan..." Your voice was barely more than a whisper, already trembling.
“Shh,” he murmured, his hands gripping your hips as he pressed a kiss just above your knee, his eyes flicking up to meet yours. The intensity there made your breath hitch. “Let me take care of you.”
He kissed his way up your inner thigh, taking his time, each press of his lips deliberate, teasing. Your heart pounded as you felt his warm breath against your skin, so close to where you wanted him, needed him.
When his lips finally brushed against you, his tongue darting out to taste, you couldn’t suppress the soft moan that spilled from your lips. His grip on your hips tightened, pulling you closer as he buried his face between your thighs, his tongue working you with an expertise that made your head spin.
“Fuck,” you gasped, your hands clutching his hair, your hips arching into him. He didn’t stop, didn’t let up, his tongue delving deep before retreating to flick against the sensitive bundle of nerves that had you trembling, your thighs pressing around his head.
Logan growled against you, the vibrations shooting straight through your core, and the sound of it—rough, primal—only spurred you on. He was relentless, his lips and tongue working you with a fervor that left no doubt about how much he enjoyed this, enjoyed you.
“Logan, I—” Your words dissolved into a whimper, your body tensing as he pushed you closer and closer to the edge. His name was a mantra on your lips, each syllable punctuated by gasps and moans as he pulled you apart and put you back together with every stroke of his tongue.
When you finally shattered, the release crashing over you like a tidal wave, he didn’t stop. He worked you through it, his hands holding you steady as you trembled, as your body arched and writhed against him. Only when you were completely spent, your breaths coming in short, ragged gasps, did he pull back, his lips and chin glistening as he looked up at you with a wicked grin.
“You taste like heaven,” he said, his voice rough, gravelly, as he rose to his feet, his hands still resting on your thighs. “I could do that all night.”
You laughed breathlessly, leaning back against the couch, your body still tingling, your cheeks flushed. “You’re insatiable.”
“Says the woman who was just beggin’ me for more,” Logan teased, his voice a low rumble as his lips brushed against yours. His kiss was slow and deliberate, his tongue sliding into your mouth with practiced ease. The taste of him mixed with the remnants of your own release sent a thrill racing through you, your hands gripping his shoulders tightly, keeping him close.
When he pulled back, his forehead rested against yours, his breath warm against your skin. “You sure you’re not tryin’ to kill me, darlin’? Feels like every time I get my hands on you, I lose a few more pieces of myself.”
Your lips curved into a soft smile, your fingers idly playing with the short hairs at the nape of his neck. “That doesn’t sound like such a bad thing.”
Logan huffed a laugh, the sound deep and almost self-deprecating. His thumb traced lazy circles on your thigh, his gaze locked on yours. “For you, maybe not. For me? I’m startin’ to think I wouldn’t mind it.”
The weight of his words hung in the air, a quiet confession that made your chest tighten. You reached up, brushing your thumb along the rough edge of his jaw. “I wouldn’t let that happen,” you murmured, your voice soft but steady. “You’re too important, Logan. To me.”
His expression softened, the hard edges of his usual demeanor giving way to something more vulnerable. “You’ve got no idea what you do to me, Y/N.”
“Maybe you should show me,” you said, your voice carrying a teasing lilt, though the heat in your eyes betrayed how serious you were.
Logan’s lips quirked into a small, almost mischievous grin. “You’re insatiable, you know that?”
You shrugged, feigning innocence. “Maybe. But you don’t seem to mind.”
He let out a low growl, his hands sliding up your thighs to grip your hips. “You’re damn right I don’t.”
In one fluid motion, Logan had you lifted, his hands firm as he repositioned you to straddle his lap. You let out a surprised laugh, gripping his shoulders to steady yourself as you settled against him. The warmth of his body seeped into yours, the solidness of him grounding you in a way that felt almost necessary.
“See? Told ya I had better plans than cleanin’,” he murmured, his lips brushing against your collarbone as he spoke.
You tilted your head, giving him more access, a soft hum escaping your lips. “I think I’m starting to agree.”
Logan’s hands roamed over you, calloused fingers exploring the soft curves of your body with reverence. There was no rush, no urgency in his movements. It was deliberate, almost tender, as though he wanted to memorize every inch of you.
His lips trailed a path along your neck, his scruff scraping against your skin in a way that sent shivers racing down your spine. “You drive me fuckin’ crazy,” he admitted, his voice low, almost like a growl.
“I could say the same about you,” you whispered, your fingers trailing down his chest, tracing the lines of muscle beneath his shirt.
Logan’s hands gripped the hem of the flannel you wore, his knuckles brushing against your skin as he slowly lifted it. He paused, his gaze flicking up to meet yours, seeking permission.
You nodded, your breath catching in your throat as he pulled the shirt over your head and tossed it aside. His eyes darkened as they roamed over you, taking in the sight of your bare skin bathed in the warm glow of the late afternoon sun.
“Goddamn,” he muttered, his voice thick with something between awe and hunger.
You felt heat rise to your cheeks, but the look in his eyes kept any hint of self-consciousness at bay. “You’re staring,” you teased, though your voice wavered slightly under the weight of his gaze.
“Can’t help it,” he said simply, his hands sliding up your sides, thumbs brushing just beneath your ribs. “You’re fuckin’ beautiful, Y/N. Don’t think I’ll ever get tired of lookin’ at you.”
The sincerity in his words made your heart ache in the best way. You leaned forward, capturing his lips in a kiss that was slow and deep, your hands threading through his hair as you pressed yourself against him.
Logan’s hands gripped your hips, holding you steady as he shifted beneath you, the hard press of him against your core drawing a soft gasp from your lips. He swallowed the sound with a groan, his grip tightening as he began to rock you against him, the friction sending sparks of pleasure racing through you.
“Logan,” you breathed, your voice trembling with need.
“Shh, I got you,” he murmured, his lips brushing against the shell of your ear. “Just let me take care of you, darlin’.”
His hands moved to your waist, guiding your movements as he kissed you again, his lips moving against yours with a deliberate slowness that left you breathless. Each roll of your hips against him was maddeningly slow, the steady build of tension making you ache for more.
“Logan, please,” you whispered, your hands clutching at his shoulders as you tried to quicken the pace.
He chuckled softly, the sound vibrating against your lips. “Patience, Y/N. I’m not in a rush.”
You huffed in frustration, though the warmth in his gaze softened the sharp edges of your need. “You’re cruel,” you muttered, though the slight smile tugging at your lips betrayed your words.
“Cruel, huh?” he echoed, a smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth. His hands slid down to cup your ass, squeezing gently as he shifted beneath you. “Pretty sure you’ll be thankin’ me when I’m done with you.”
You couldn’t help but laugh softly, the sound dissolving into a soft moan as he bucked his hips against you, the friction sending another wave of heat coursing through you.
“Logan,” you gasped, your voice a mix of exasperation and longing.
He grinned, clearly enjoying the effect he had on you. “Yeah, darlin’? What do you need?”
“You,” you said simply, the single word carrying a weight that seemed to hang in the air between you.
Logan’s expression softened, his teasing demeanor shifting as something deeper flickered in his gaze. “You’ve got me,” he said, his voice steady, his hands firm on your hips as though anchoring you to him.
Your heart stuttered at his words, the raw sincerity of them making your chest feel impossibly tight. You leaned in, pressing your forehead against his as your fingers slid down his chest, the fabric of his shirt rough under your touch. “I’m glad,” you murmured, your voice barely above a whisper.
Logan’s lips found yours again, the kiss unhurried and deliberate, his hands roaming up and down your thighs. The heat of him seeped into your skin, grounding you as you moved against him. The friction was maddening, a slow burn that made you ache for more.
“Darlin’,” he rasped against your lips, his voice thick and strained, “you’re makin’ it real hard to take this slow.”
“Maybe I don’t want slow,” you countered, your tone teasing, though the way your breath hitched betrayed your own urgency.
Logan chuckled low, the sound vibrating through you as his lips moved to your neck, trailing kisses along your skin. “Trust me, you do,” he murmured, his teeth grazing your pulse point just enough to make your thighs tighten around him. “I want to feel every second of this.”
His words sent a shiver down your spine, your fingers tightening in his hair as he took his time exploring every inch of you. Logan’s hands slid beneath your thighs, lifting you slightly as he shifted on the couch, settling back further into the cushions.
The new angle pressed you more firmly against him, drawing a gasp from your lips that he swallowed with another kiss. “Fuck,” you whispered, your hands clutching at his shoulders.
“You okay?” he asked, his tone softer, though the hunger in his eyes was unmistakable.
“More than okay,” you replied, your voice trembling as you shifted your hips, testing the pressure between you.
Logan growled low in his throat, his grip on you tightening as his hands slid up your back. “You’re somethin’ else, Y/N,” he said, his words heavy with reverence.
You didn’t reply, too caught up in the way he was looking at you, as though you were the only thing in the world that mattered. Your fingers found the hem of his shirt, tugging it upward. “Off,” you said simply, your voice breathless but firm.
He smirked, obliging without hesitation as he pulled the shirt over his head and tossed it aside. Your eyes raked over him, taking in the broad expanse of his chest, the scars that marred his otherwise flawless skin.
“Like what you see?” he teased, though there was a hint of vulnerability in his tone.
“Always,” you replied, your hands trailing over his chest, fingers tracing the lines of old wounds. “You’re beautiful, Logan.”
He huffed a quiet laugh, his hands sliding back to your waist. “Don’t think anyone’s called me that before.”
“Well, they should have,” you said, leaning in to press a kiss to his collarbone.
Logan’s hands tightened on your hips, guiding you as you moved against him, the steady grind of your bodies making your head spin. “You’re gonna be the death of me,” he muttered, though the words were laced with affection.
“Not likely,” you quipped, a soft laugh escaping you.
He chuckled, the sound low and warm as he shifted again, one hand moving to undo the button of his jeans. Your breath hitched as you realized what was coming next, anticipation coiling tightly in your stomach.
“You sure about this?” he asked, his voice softer now, his gaze searching yours.
“Logan,” you said, your tone steady despite the way your heart was racing. “I’ve never been more sure about anything.”
He nodded once, his hands steady as he slid his jeans down just enough, freeing himself. You couldn’t help the soft gasp that escaped you as you took him in, your cheeks flushing at the sight.
“Come here,” he said, his voice rough as he guided you closer, his hands firm on your hips.
You moved slowly, adjusting yourself over him, the heat of him against you making you tremble. Logan’s hands were steady, his thumbs brushing soothing circles on your skin as he guided you.
When you finally sank down onto him, the feeling was overwhelming, a perfect mix of pleasure and fullness that made you moan softly. Logan groaned, his head falling back against the couch as his hands gripped your hips tightly.
“Fuck, Y/N,” he rasped, his voice raw. “You feel... Jesus, darlin’, you’re perfect.”
You didn’t reply, too caught up in the way he felt, the way he filled you completely. You braced your hands on his shoulders, your breaths coming in short, uneven gasps as you began to move.
Logan’s hands guided your movements, his grip firm but not controlling as he let you set the pace. His lips found yours again, the kiss deep and consuming as you rocked against him, your bodies moving in perfect sync.
The steady rhythm built slowly, the intensity growing with each roll of your hips. Logan’s hands roamed over you, sliding up your back, tangling in your hair, grounding you in the moment.
“Y/N,” he murmured, his voice thick with emotion.
You met his gaze, your heart skipping a beat at the way he was looking at you. It wasn’t just lust—it was something deeper, something that made your chest ache in the best way.
“I’ve got you,” he said, his hands tightening on your hips as he thrust upward, matching your movements.
The new angle sent a wave of pleasure crashing over you, a soft cry escaping your lips as you clung to him. “Logan,” you gasped, your voice trembling.
“Right here, darlin’,” he murmured, his voice steady despite the strain in it.
The intensity between you grew, the slow, deliberate pace giving way to something more urgent as your bodies moved together. Each thrust, each kiss, each touch pushed you closer to the edge, the tension building to an almost unbearable peak.
When you finally shattered, it was like nothing you’d ever felt before. Logan held you through it, his hands steady on your hips as your body trembled, his name falling from your lips in a breathless mantra.
He followed moments later, a low, guttural groan escaping him as he buried his face in your neck, his grip on you tightening as he found his release.
For a long moment, neither of you moved, your breaths mingling as you clung to each other, the world outside forgotten.
“You okay?” Logan asked finally, his voice soft, his hands rubbing soothing circles on your back.
“More than okay,” you replied, your voice muffled against his neck.
He chuckled softly, pressing a kiss to your temple. “Good. ‘Cause I’m not lettin’ you go anytime soon.”
“Didn’t plan on going anywhere,” you said, a smile tugging at your lips as you leaned back to look at him.
Logan’s expression softened, his hands moving to cup your face. “You’re somethin’ else, Y/N,” he said, his voice filled with quiet reverence.
“And you’re mine,” you replied, your tone steady despite the warmth spreading through your chest.
“Damn right I am,” he said, his lips curving into a small, almost boyish grin.
The two of you stayed like that, tangled together on the couch, the rest of the world fading away. For now, there was only this—only him.
---
You turned off the water that was filling the bathtub and dipped your hand in to test the temperature of the water. The water was just right—hot, with steam gently rolling off the surface. You stood, wiping your hands on the towel, just as you heard the front door creak open and close with a soft click. Logan’s footsteps padded quietly through the cabin, but you could still feel that familiar presence, that comforting weight of him even when he wasn’t yet in sight.
You barely had time to turn around before he appeared in the doorway, eyebrows raised as he took in the sight of you standing by the tub. “Now this is a surprise,” he said, a hint of a smirk playing on his lips.
“Thought you’d like a soak after all that work you did today,” you replied, a little smile tugging at your mouth. You stepped aside, gesturing toward the water. “Go on, it’s ready.”
Logan’s gaze softened, though his smirk never quite faded. “So you’re spoilin’ me now, huh?”
“Maybe a little,” you teased, leaning against the doorframe as you watched him. “Can’t have you overdoing it. You might be practically indestructible, but a hot bath never hurt anyone.”
He chuckled, unbuttoning his shirt and shrugging it off. “Got a point there,” he admitted, tossing it onto the nearby chair. You tried not to stare, but you couldn’t help your eyes drifting over the familiar planes of his chest, scars crisscrossing his skin like a map of all the years he’d survived. He didn’t seem to notice—or maybe he didn’t mind—just kept undressing as if it was the most natural thing in the world.
Logan stepped into the tub, easing himself down with a contented sigh as he settled into the water. He leaned his head back, his eyes fluttering shut as the steam rose around him. For a moment, you simply watched him, a fond smile on your lips.
“Good?” you asked softly, breaking the silence.
He cracked one eye open, glancing at you with a lazy grin. “Better than good. You joinin’ me?”
You laughed, shaking your head. “This one’s all yours. I’ll go make us something to drink.”
Before you could turn, Logan reached out, his wet hand catching yours. He looked up at you, his expression softer now. “Stay, darlin’. Least for a bit.”
His thumb brushed gently over your knuckles, and you found yourself nodding, unable to refuse him. You sat down beside the tub, close enough that you could still feel the warmth of the water, and he let his hand rest in yours.
Logan kissed the top of your hand, a mischievous glint in his eye. "Sure ya don’t wanna join me? Promise I don’t bite."
You raised an eyebrow, smirking. "Uh-huh. That's what they all say."
He chuckled, his fingers still wrapped gently around yours, as if he was savoring this quiet moment between you. “Could use a little company, that’s all,” he murmured, his gaze never leaving your face.
“This is supposed to be a bath for you.” You replied, your own eyebrow quirked.
“I’d enjoy it more if you were in here with me.”
You raised an eyebrow at Logan, the corner of your mouth quirking into a teasing smile. “Is that right? Well, maybe if you’re lucky.”
Logan’s smirk deepened, a playful glint in his eye as he leaned forward, resting his arms on the side of the tub. “Oh, come on. I’m always lucky when it comes to you.” His voice was a low murmur, pulling you in with that familiar, lazy charm he always seemed to have.
“Uh-huh, says the guy who tried to convince me he could take on a shark,” you shot back, crossing your arms, leaning casually against the wall. “You’re just full of bold ideas, huh?”
He chuckled, giving a shrug. “I stand by that. But I’m talkin’ serious here.” His hand reached out, fingertips grazing your wrist in a way that sent a warmth through you. “No sharks, no messin’ around. Just you, right here.”
The sincerity caught you a little off guard. The tension settled into something deeper as you looked at him, his hand steady on yours, like he was holding onto more than just the moment.
“I guess… I could keep you company,” you said softly, the lightness of your earlier words giving way to something quieter. You slipped out of your shirt, feeling Logan’s gaze follow you, his eyes dark with a warmth that made you feel both nervous and excited.
Sliding into the water, you settled in close to him, leaning back as his arms naturally came around you. The water was hot, relaxing every part of you, but it was Logan’s touch, the gentle press of his fingers tracing over your arm, that made you feel completely at ease.
“See?” he murmured against your hair, his lips grazing the top of your head. “Told ya this was a good idea.”
You hummed, closing your eyes as you leaned into him. “You did. Guess I should listen to you more often.”
Logan’s hand slid along your shoulder, trailing down your arm with a steady, careful touch, like he was trying to memorize every inch. You felt the warmth of his breath against your neck, followed by the soft press of his lips just below your ear. The tension of the day melted away, leaving you relaxed and content in his embrace.
For a few moments, you both just stayed there, the only sounds the quiet rustle of water and the occasional creak of the cabin settling. Logan’s fingers traced small, lazy circles along your arm, his other hand holding you close against him, anchoring you to him like he was afraid you’d disappear if he let go.
“So,” you murmured, breaking the silence, “this isn’t so bad, right?”
Logan let out a low chuckle. “Could get used to it,” he said, his voice rumbling against your back. “Peace and quiet. Just the two of us.” His hand dipped below the water, wrapping around yours.
You squeezed his hand, feeling a warmth bloom in your chest. “Thought you’d be the type to get bored out here, all this peace and quiet.”
He gave a noncommittal shrug, though his thumb continued to brush over the back of your hand. “Can handle a bit of quiet if it means you’re here,” he said softly, almost as if he was talking to himself.
You smiled, tilting your head to look at him, your faces close. “Guess that makes two of us.” You felt a strange flutter in your stomach, the weight of those unspoken words lingering between you both.
Logan’s eyes flicked down to your lips, his gaze soft and intent. “You gonna kiss me, or do I gotta ask real nice?”
“Always so impatient,” you teased, but you leaned in, closing the distance, your lips meeting his in a soft, lingering kiss. His hand moved up to cradle your face, his thumb brushing your cheek as he deepened the kiss, slow and unhurried, like he was savoring every second. When you finally pulled back, you were both breathing a little heavier, your forehead resting against his.
Logan looked at you, a small, crooked smile on his lips. “See? Worth the wait.”
You laughed, shaking your head, but there was no denying the truth in his words. “You really know how to charm a girl, you know that?”
“Only got one girl I’m tryin’ to charm,” he replied, his voice rough but warm.
Your smile softened as you nestled back against him, letting the silence settle over you both once more. The warmth of the water, the feel of his arms around you—it felt like a small eternity in that moment, like nothing else in the world mattered except this.
---
Trying to turn the conversation away from what Logan told you, about Stryker coming to visit him about a ‘mission’, you started to talk about your day, with Logan’s head in your lap as you ran your fingers through his hair.
“The stray was matted but Tina started calling him Wolf. Said the dog reminded her of another animal.”
Logan hummed, his eyes still closed, “lemme guess, she showed you a picture of the animal from her book.”
You giggled, “yeah, she did. Gotta admit that dog looked quite similar to the wolverine in her book.” You tilted your head downwards to look at him, “Reminded me of you. Grizzly, sometimes dirty.”
Logan opened one eye, a smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth. “Oh yeah? Grizzly, huh?”
“Maybe a little.” You grinned, your fingers drifting through his hair in slow strokes. “Not just the dirty part, by the way. Wolverines are pretty fierce, don’t let much stand in their way.”
He let out a low chuckle, closing his eye again, seeming to relax further under your touch. “Guess I’ll take that as a compliment, comin’ from you.” There was a slight pause, and his voice softened a bit. “Not everyone’s a fan of the grizzly type.”
You scoffed lightly, continuing to thread your fingers through his hair. “Well, good thing I am. You know, even wolverines have a soft side somewhere.”
Logan huffed a small laugh. “Yeah? Don’t think I’ve got much of that left, but I’ll take your word for it.”
“Oh, you definitely do.” You brushed a thumb gently along his temple. “Trust me. Like today—taking the time to help out with that old couple’s truck, even after a full day’s work.” You smiled down at him, admiration clear in your gaze. “I see it, Logan, even if you don’t.”
He tilted his head a bit, opening his eyes and looking up at you, his expression unreadable for a second before he sighed, a smirk breaking the moment. “Keep sayin’ things like that, and I might start to believe you.”
You laughed, rolling your eyes. “I’ve got plenty more where that came from.”
Logan’s gaze softened, but he kept his usual, laid-back tone. “Guess I’m lucky you put up with me, huh?”
“You know it.” You winked, letting your fingers trail down to his jawline, and you felt him relax a little more, like he could melt under your touch. “Plus, someone’s gotta keep you in check.”
“Not an easy job,” he muttered, a glimmer of amusement in his eyes as he leaned into your hand, his voice barely above a murmur. “You’re somethin’ else, Y/N.”
The two of you fell quiet for a moment, the warmth in his gaze making your heart beat just a little faster, and you couldn’t help but lean down, pressing a soft kiss to his forehead. When you pulled back, he just looked at you with that familiar mix of amusement and something else—a depth you didn’t need him to explain.
You shifted slightly, a small smile still on your face. “Now, about that dog—think you could convince Tina to bring him around here?”
Logan’s eyebrows lifted, a smirk tugging at his lips again. “Bringing a stray mutt up here? You sure?”
“Why not? He’d be a good watch dog for you when I’m not around,” you said, with a wink.
He chuckled, a bit softer this time. “Guess I’ll think about it.” Then, his eyes crinkled with that familiar spark of humor. “But only if you promise not to call me Grizzly in front of anyone else.”
You laughed, leaning back against the couch, his head still in your lap. “Deal.”
For a few minutes, neither of you spoke, and you just let yourself soak up the comfortable silence, the simplicity of Logan resting there, perfectly at ease. And as your hand drifted gently through his hair again, you couldn’t help but wonder if this—these quiet moments—might be what you’d both been needing all along.
---
You were driving down a narrow road, the trees thickening as you made your way toward town. The familiar hum of a cassette player filled the car, and you tapped your fingers against the steering wheel in rhythm. It had been a good week—a small but sweet milestone with Logan, half a year together, and you’d even managed to keep things peaceful in that cabin of his. Tonight was supposed to be simple, a little surprise you’d planned: a tiramisu. Probably the only thing you could bake to perfection.
You rounded a curve, smiling to yourself when—
The sight in the distance made your stomach twist. A figure stood in the middle of the road, dressed in black, unmoving, watching you with an unsettling focus. You slowed the car, blinking to see if you were imagining things. But no—he was still there, large and unflinching in the middle of the narrow path.
As you approached, your heart hammered against your ribs. Something about him was familiar, but not in any way that felt safe or warm.
You pressed on the brake, bringing the car to a cautious stop. The man took a slow, deliberate step forward, his face coming into view under the faint sunlight streaming through the trees. His eyes were cold, almost amused, and his mouth twisted into a cruel smile.
It was him—Victor. The man Logan had mentioned a few times, enough to make you know he wasn’t someone you’d ever want to meet, much less find waiting for you like this.
“Going somewhere?” he asked, his voice deep, mocking, and calm in a way that was anything but reassuring.
You tried to keep your face calm, hands gripping the steering wheel tighter. “Just heading into town,” you replied, voice steadier than you felt. “Is there…something you need?”
He tilted his head, like he was sizing you up. “Logan ever mention me?”
A chill crawled up your spine, but you kept your expression guarded. “Maybe once or twice.”
Victor took another step forward, his gaze raking over you with a twisted curiosity, almost like he was toying with the idea of letting you go—but only almost. “See, I’ve been meaning to have a little chat with him,” he drawled, his tone venomous, “and here you are, just making it easy for me.”
You felt a pulse of dread, instinct telling you to turn the car around and get out of there, fast. But you knew better than to provoke him. “Logan’s not here,” you said, hoping that would be enough.
He smirked, that same cold expression never leaving his face. “I’m aware,” he murmured, taking another slow step toward you. “You think he’d leave someone like you on your own if he thought you’d be safe?”
Your heart raced, a knot of fear tightening in your throat. You wanted to say something, anything, to stall him, to get yourself out of this, but nothing came to mind. The realization was dawning, and from the look in Victor’s eyes, he knew it too. There would be no bargaining, no reasoning with him.
"Didn't think Logan would be the type to leave someone behind. Guess I was wrong," he said, sounding amused.
You tightened your grip on the steering wheel, refusing to give in to the fear swirling in your chest. "Logan’s not here," you repeated, your voice firm.
"Like I said, I know," Victor replied smoothly, taking another step. His eyes traveled over the car, then over you, a twisted curiosity behind them. "But I figure, maybe you can pass along a little message for me."
Every instinct told you to run, but the car blocked you in, and Victor was only feet away. "What do you want, Victor?"
He grinned, his sharp teeth glinting under the dim light. "Simple. Tell Logan I said 'hi'... if you get the chance."
The dread in your stomach crystallized as he lunged forward. You tried to move, to react, but he was too fast. His hand closed around your throat, lifting you out of the car as though you weighed nothing, and you fought, kicking, clawing, anything you could think of to get free.
"You know," Victor’s voice was disturbingly calm, "he’s been through a lot. But there’s always that soft spot, that weakness he can’t seem to shake."
Desperation flared within you, and you kicked harder, one foot making contact with his chest. It only made him laugh, and he tightened his grip, his face drawing close enough that you could see the cold cruelty in his eyes.
"You’re just like all the others," he murmured, voice almost thoughtful. "Maybe a little more stubborn, but that’s hardly new."
Black spots began to dance at the edges of your vision, your breath coming shorter and shorter. You knew there was no getting out of this—not with him, not with a monster like Victor Creed.
But Logan...
---
Logan walked through the vegetation right by where he and the other guys were cutting apart a tree. He stopped short once he saw the head of an animal laying on the yellow grass.
“What you doing, Logan?” One of the guys asked from behind.
Logan looked around before seeing large scratch marks on a tree trunk, lined with red. “Y/N.” He whispered, before running down the hill and through the forest.
Once he hit the clearing, he could see the truck on the side of the road. Logan reached the car, his hands gripping the window frame as he scanned the empty interior. “Y/N…?” His voice was rough, the crack of worry breaking through, echoing in the quiet forest.
His eyes darted down to the disturbed earth, faint scuff marks in the dirt telling him where you might’ve been dragged. His heart hammered as he followed the path into the trees, every step growing heavier with dread as he moved through the dense underbrush, the silence unsettling.
And then, in a small clearing, he found you.
You were lying there, so still, your skin pale against the forest floor, hair fanned around you like a dark halo. Blood flecked the ground, stark and terrible against the greenery. He staggered, dropping to his knees beside you, reaching out with trembling hands, one of them clenching briefly before he let himself touch you.
“Y/N…” he whispered, voice breaking as he cupped your face, his fingers brushing a smear of dirt from your cheek. Your eyes were closed, lips parted just slightly, as if you’d been trying to say his name. For a split second, he could almost pretend you were just asleep, and that any second you’d open your eyes, make some joke, or reach up to tug him down to you.
But there was no warmth, no spark, nothing.
Logan’s breath caught, and he pulled you close, his arms cradling you as if he could shield you from the reality already etched into his heart. The rage simmered below his skin, burning through the grief, fueling the ache with something primal. He rocked back, jaw clenched so hard it hurt, his face buried in your hair, trying to hold on to any last trace of you, the faint scent of you still lingering, even as everything around him felt like it was falling apart.
“You… You were supposed to be safe here,” he whispered against your hair, voice hoarse. “I shoulda been here. I shoulda…” His words trailed off into silence as he sat there, unmoving, clutching you in his arms as if the weight of his grief alone could pull you back.
He looked down at you, his thumb grazing over your cheek one last time, as though trying to commit every detail of your face to memory. “Y/N… I swear… I’ll make him pay.” The last words came out like a promise, a vow laced with the kind of anger only a man like Logan could bear. He leaned down, pressing a soft kiss to your forehead before letting out a long, broken breath.
When he finally tore his gaze away from you, his eyes turned cold, a new resolve searing through him.
This wasn’t over.
umm... sorry??
i tried to make a different version of how logan got the name 'wolverine' to try and fit reader's personality, since she probably doesn't know about the myth kayla did.
next chapter will be x2!
#logan howlett x reader#logan howlett x you#wolverine x reader#wolverine x you#james howlett x reader#james howlett x you#logan howlett#logan howlett fanfiction#logan howlett x fem!reader#logan howlett fic#i love you in every time
190 notes
·
View notes
Note
Hello hope you're having a good day! If you are still taking requests I love the idea of fluff 27 + suggestive 5 together! Reader doing/saying it to best boy Mingyu please <3
hello!!! I am & yes yes omg this is so cute!!! thank you for requesting 🤍
request your own: full prompt list!
check out my masterlist! // gyu's m.list
fluff prompt #27: "did you plan this whole day just to make me happy?" +
suggestive prompt #5: "is that your way of asking me to stay the night?"
mingyu doesn’t think he deserves a day like this.
he’s been feeling a little off lately, the kind of off where his brain works too hard to convince him he’s not enough. not good enough for his members, his fans, and definitely not good enough for you. he hadn’t told you any of this, of course, because what kind of boyfriend lays that weight on someone else? but somehow, you just knew. you always did.
you’d planned the entire day down to the last detail—every moment overflowing with warmth and ease.
his favorite breakfast, eaten slowly at the cozy café he’d shyly confessed to loving on your third date. an afternoon hike where you teased him for tripping over his own feet and then held his hand the rest of the way up. dinner on the balcony of your apartment, fairy lights strung above as the city glittered in the background.
he sits now with you on that balcony, your legs tangled under the small blanket you’d pulled out when the air turned cooler. you’re leaning back against him, his arms wrapped loosely around your waist. the scent of your shampoo drifts up every time the wind catches your hair, and mingyu thinks it’s the happiest he’s felt in weeks.
he kisses the top of your head, unable to stop himself from smiling.
“did you plan this whole day just to make me happy?”
you tilt your head up to look at him, your lips quirking in that way that makes his heart stumble over itself.
“maybe.”
“you did,” he says, a little breathless, tightening his arms around you. “you totally did. how do you even—how do you know what i need without me saying anything?”
“you think i don’t notice when you’re not yourself?” you reply softly. “i know you, mingyu. it’s not that hard to figure out.”
mingyu blinks down at you, his chest aching in the best way possible. you’re looking at him like you’re proud of him, like you see every part of him—even the parts he’s tried to hide—and love him anyway.
he leans down to kiss you, slow and deliberate, his fingers slipping into your hair as he cups the back of your head. you hum against his mouth, the sound sending a shiver down his spine. when you pull back, there’s a teasing glint in your eye.
“i hope you’re planning to return the favor someday,” you say.
“someday?” he scoffs, brushing his thumb across your cheek. “as if i don’t spend every day trying to make you happy.”
“you’re sweet,” you murmur, your voice dropping just enough to make his pulse skip. “but i think you’re overestimating yourself.”
mingyu’s jaw drops. “overestimating—are you serious? you’re lucky i don’t pick you up and throw you over my shoulder.”
“you wouldn’t dare.”
his grin widens, and you laugh, leaning forward just enough to press a quick kiss to his jaw. your lips linger there for a moment, and mingyu’s thoughts scatter like leaves in the wind.
when you pull back again, there’s something playful in your expression, but it’s layered with a warmth that makes his heart race.
“so,” you say casually, brushing nonexistent lint off his sweater, before settling your hands around the back of his neck, "you don’t have to go home tonight if you don’t want to."
mingyu freezes.
he can feel your eyes on him, waiting for a reaction, but his brain seems to be short-circuiting.
you tilt your head, a small smile tugging at your lips. “what? too subtle?” you tease.
his throat feels dry, but he manages to swallow and find his voice. “is that—” he pauses, his lips quirking despite himself. “is that your way of asking me to stay the night?”
you roll your eyes, but the blush creeping up your neck betrays you. “do you have to say it like that?” you complained.
“me?” mingyu grins, leaning closer so his nose brushes against yours. “you’re the one who—wait, are you blushing right now?”
“no,” you say, but your voice wavers just enough to make him laugh.
“you totally are.” his grin softens, and he reaches up to gently cup your cheek, his thumb brushing over your heated skin. “you’re cute, you know that?”
“shut up,” you mutter, but your lips curve upward as you lean into his touch.
for a moment, mingyu just looks at you. the city lights reflect in your eyes, and he thinks it’s entirely unfair how beautiful you are.
“okay,” he says quietly.
you blink up at him. “okay?”
“yeah,” he murmurs, his hand slipping to the back of your neck as he kisses you again.
you hum against his lips, your hands sliding up his chest to rest on his shoulders. he doesn’t think he’ll ever get used to the way you touch him, so soft and careful, like you’re holding something precious.
when you finally pull back, your forehead rests against his, and you’re smiling in that way that makes him want to promise you the world.
mingyu laughs, his breath warm against your skin. “you know, i’m starting to think you planned this whole day for more than just making me happy.”
you pull back slightly to meet his gaze, your eyebrows raised in mock offense. “are you accusing me of ulterior motives?”
“maybe,” he teases, his hands sliding to rest on your waist.
you smirk, your fingers tracing absent patterns on his chest. “guess you’ll have to stick around and find out.”
his heart stumbles again, and he wonders how he got so lucky.
“oh, i’m not going anywhere,” he says, his voice low and certain.
mingyu doesn't move though, his eyes trained on you, taking in the way the wind blows in your hair, the way your cheeks are still tinted pink, and the way your eyes keep flickering between his own & his lips.
“what are you doing?” you ask softly, your voice barely above a whisper.
“looking at you,” he murmurs, his tone low, like he doesn’t want to scare the moment away. his hand comes up to brush a stray strand of hair away from your face, his fingertips lingering against your cheek. “you're so beautiful”
your breath catchesnas you pull mingyu him, his lips meet yours slowly, like he’s memorizing every detail—the softness, the warmth, the way you gasp softly against his mouth. his hands cradle your face, holding you gently but firmly, as if he’s afraid you’ll disappear if he lets go.
you don’t know who moves first, but suddenly you’re closer, pressed against him, your fingers curling into his sweater. his lips part slightly, and the kiss deepens, sending a shiver down your spine. mingyu tilts his head, his thumb brushing your jaw as he kisses you like he’s been waiting for this forever.
it’s not just a kiss—it’s consuming. the world around you fades until it’s just him. the faint scent of his cologne, the way his chest rises and falls against yours, the soft hum he lets out when your fingers tangle in his hair.
he pulls back just enough to rest his forehead against yours, his breath warm and unsteady.
“you’re dangerous,” he says softly, his lips brushing yours with each word.
“me?” you manage to whisper, your own voice shaky. “what does that make you, then?”
he smirks, his eyes dark with something that sends your heart racing. “completely yours.”
before you can respond, his lips find yours again, hungrier this time. his hands slide down to your waist, pulling you impossibly closer, and you can feel the heat radiating off him. he kisses you like he needs you, like he doesn’t know how to stop, and you’re not sure you want him to.
your hands trail up his chest, slipping over his shoulders and around his neck, and the sound he makes when your nails scrape lightly against his skin sends warmth pooling in your stomach.
he breaks away just long enough to press a kiss to the corner of your mouth, then your jaw, then the sensitive spot just below your ear. “you’re gonna be the death of me,” he murmurs, his voice low and breathless.
you laugh softly, tugging him back to you. “then don’t stop.”
& mingyu doesn’t.
#seventeen#seventeen imagine#svt#svt x reader#seventeen fluff#svt fluff#seventeen x reader#daisymbin: reqs#mingyu x reader#kim mingyu x reader#kim mingyu x you#kim mingyu seventeen#seventeen kim mingyu#mingyu seventeen#seventeen mingyu#mingyu fluff#mingyu imagines#mingyu fanfic#kim mingyu fluff#kim mingyu fanfic#kim mingyu imagines#kim mingyu#mingyu
97 notes
·
View notes
Text
Born Too Late - Chapter 5
pairing/au: neighbor!joel x reader // no outbreak
Warnings: MDNI!!! SMUT (2 chapters in a row :0.. So much for slow burn), age gap, no use of y/n, i think thats it fr, dirty talk, unprotected p in v (be smart yall, wrap it up) lemme know if i missed something :)
Summary: Sarah's conference is this week and seeing Joel is not on your list of things you want to do. Then he invites you over to talk. You need to set the boundary now, what could go wrong? (1.6k+)
a/n: i tried to write a lil more than usual bc i feel bad about inconsistent posting. (shoutout no personal life bc work/school) hopefully with winter break i can post a couple times a week. also trying to figure out how to make a taglist so if you want to be notified of new chapters, lmk!! If you have any suggestions, give em to a girl. i love to see/hear feedback :) <3
Yet again, you’re avoiding Joel like the plague. You have an unknown amount of missed calls from him. You also have conferences today. This means you have to see him, and you feel like you could throw up. He’s your last one at 5:30 p.m. The day goes by slowly, and you have lunch duty so you don’t have time to finish planning your conference notes. After lunch is the worst part of the day. Kids are tired and barely give a shit, but you have a couple good ones that you try to focus on. Sarah being one of them. The 2:30 bell rings and by 2:40 your class is empty. Conferences start at 3:30 so you finish your notes and try to eat your lunch but that sinking feeling is still there.
By 5:15, you’ve talked to so many parents that they’re all starting to blur. You’re exhausted and would rather be quite literally anywhere else by now. You gather Sarah's notes and sit them on the table, one stack in front of you and a copy of your stack in front of where Joel will sit. Sarah really enjoys a select few books from your classroom library so you sit them on her desk for her in case she's with Joel.
Before you see him, you smell him. The air in your classroom fills with hints of cedarwood and lavender. You look up and Sarah is already at her desk looking at the books. You stand to greet Joel. “Good Evening Mr. Miller” you reach to shake his hand but he doesn't move, he is staring right through you. “Sweet girl, you don't have to call me that.” He says, still staring. You smile and invite him to sit. “So” you start “Sarah is doing phenomenal, she loves to read and write, and is always very engaged. I pulled a few samples of her writings from the last couple weeks so you could read them. They’re the first sheets inside your fold-” “Babygirl” he says gruffly “I know my daughter, and she has excelled and exceeded every year. I'm here for you. Why have you been avoiding me?” You look at him, wide eyed. Half wanting to laugh and half wanting to cry. Your door is open and anyone could walk by and hear him, Sarah could hear him. “Joel I promise I'm not trying to avoid you” you say quietly, lying straight through your teeth. And he knows it. You stand up and walk to close the door and can feel his eyes burning through you. “I just dont think-” “I've called you more times than I can count, and you aint returned a single one. Shit baby, your bra is still on my bedroom floor. Taunting me every night.” You can feel the warmth begin to rise on your face, and between your legs. “Mr.Miller, now is not the time or the place for this conversation. If we could please get back to Sarah.” He looks at you, deadpan. “Alright, come to my house tomorrow night at 8. Sarah will be with her mom for the weekend.” Internally, you groan. Externally, “Yes sir”. You watch him stir in his chair at your words, repositioning himself.
The rest of the conference goes well, Sarah reads some of her writings to her dad, and shows him her favorite books. He asks her so many questions about her work and she is extremely detailed in every answer. He seems like a great dad, and it puts him in a different light for you. Now he isn't only hot, and great at sex, and great at aftercare, but he's a good dad. You are so fucked.
Friday comes and goes, yet again you're exhausted. You take a steaming shower when you get home. Shaving your legs, just because. NOT for Joel. Once out of the shower, you change into a pair of blue biker shorts and an oversized Texans crewneck. You throw your hair up in a bun and make yourself some coffee. Hoping the coffee will help combat the sleepiness, you throw yourself onto the couch and turn on some Grey's Anatomy reruns, and begin to drift into a nap. You try to fight it, but it's inevitable.
You wake up to your phone ringing. You check the time. 8:17. “Shit” you grumble. You flip your phone open without even checking the caller ID. “Hello?” you say, groggily. “There's my sweet girl.” He says, pausing briefly. “You’re late. Better get here fast, dinners gonna be cold.” And before you can get a word out, Joel hangs up. “Fuck fuck FUCK.” You say, frustratedly. This has gone too far, and god forbid your work gets wind of this disaster. You’d be screwed. You throw your shoes on and walk next door.
Joel opens the door right as you walk up the steps. The smells instantly take you back to that morning. You still remember how he felt inside you, how his lips felt on yours, how his hand fit around your neck so perfectly how- “You gonna come in or you just gon’ stand there?” Joel snaps you out of your trance. You follow him the rest of the way in, kicking your shoes off at the door this time. “I made spaghetti with garlic bread. Stuck it in the oven to stay warm since you tried to stand me up.” He says, grinning. “Joel look” you start, “I really appreciate this, and I really had a” “Sit down and eat. We can talk after.” He says, pulling a chair out. He walks around to the fridge, opening the door. You can't stop staring at him. His shoulders so broad, and biceps borderline busting out of his shirt. You’re in a trance. “Red or white?” he says, but you don't hear him. You’re too busy eye fucking him, completely forgetting that the only reason you’re here is to end this before it starts. He turns around and sees you still looking straight through him, undressing him with your eyes. He grins a devilish grin and you snap back to reality. “Huh? Sorry I was-” “No need to explain, I asked if you wanted red or white wine?” he says, grinning “Oh.. ummm.. White please!” He sits the glass next to you, along with your plate of food.
Dinner goes well, you talk about Sarah and how great of a student she is. You realize Joel could go on and on about her, because he does. Before you know it, its 10:00 and you're fighting sleep again. But this conversation needs to happen. You gather the plates and wine glasses and begin doing the dishes. “Darlin’ don't worry about those. I can do them in the morning.” “Joel, we need to talk.” You say, hoping it doesn't come off too harsh. You turn the sink off and dry your hands. “Joel, I had a lot of fun a few weeks ago. But I don’t think-” he cuts you off. “Why’re you thinkin’ baby? Thinkin’ don’t never lead to nothin’ good.” He says, wrapping his hands around your waist. As much as you don’t want to, you lean into his grip. “Joel, please.” you almost moan. “I don’t want to get in trouble at work, it's a huge ethical misconduct if the school were to ever find out, especially since Sarah is in my class.” He’s kissing up your neck, and you aren't doing anything to stop him. “I just want to taste you, just one more time.” He groans into your ear, nibbling on the tip. “This has to be the last time.” you think to yourself.
You don't fight it, you give in. And you enjoy every second of it. Joel picks you up and lays you on the table. The same table you just had dinner on. Your shorts are thrown across the room and your sweatshirt is being used as back support. He’s devouring every inch of your body. Leaving bite marks in unseen places. You hear his belt hit the floor and watch his shirt peel off of his body. You moan at the sight. He lines himself up with your aching cunt. “What was all that earlier about you gettin’ in trouble at work?” he says, comically. “Joel, please not-” and before you can squeak the rest of your sentence out, he's ramming his cock inside you. Over and over. “What's wrong baby? Can’t speak?” he says, laughing. Hes fucking you so hard that the goddamn table is moving. “I need something more stable.” He grunts, picking you up and throwing you on the island, his cock never leaving inside of you. He rubs vigorous circles around your clit, watching your eyes roll into the back of your head. “Dont. Stop. Joel.” You manage to say in between breaths. “I don’t ever plan to babygirl.” He says, rubbing faster. Your release is on the horizon. Everythings gone white and all you can focus on is the sound of skin slapping skin. Your back arches and you scream with pleasure. “Let it out babygirl, cum for me.” Just as you begin to come down, you feel Joel's cock tense up inside you, and he falls to your ear, moaning. He pulls out and you moan gutteraly. You feel the warmth of his seed dripping Yet again, he disappears and reappears with a warm washcloth. Cleaning and kissing every inch of your body.
You get cleaned up and dressed. Joel puts on a pair of sweatpants, no shirt. You could go for round 2 but 2 times is 2 too many. You begin to put your shoes on. “Darlin’, why don't you stay the night?” You instantly get nauseous, and feel tears? Maybe? You barely know this guy, what the fuck? “Joel, I told you. This cannot happen. Not again.” You say, trembling. “We can-” You cut him off. “No more Joel.” and you open the door and walk out. Leaving him just as quickly as you found him.
Masterlist - Chapter 4
#joel miller#joel miller x reader#joel miller fic#last of us#neighbor joel x reader#neighbor joel#cliffhanger#joel miller smut#pedro pascal#joel miller x you#the last of us#neighbor!joel#joel x reader#daddy joel#joel miller fanfiction#joel miller x f!reader#my writing#tlou#joel tlou
47 notes
·
View notes
Text
CHAPTER 5
Harlow
I DON’T HEAR anything else he says. I abruptly rise from my chair, practically tipping it over, and get the fuck out of that cafe as fast as I possibly can.
By the time I reach the patio, my chest is so tight, that I can hardly pull in a lungful of air. I feel like I can’t breathe, like I’m going to pass out, and my heart is beating so fast, I can feel it pulsing in my throat.
Fuck.
I know exactly what this is. It’s a panic attack–one of several dozen I’ve had in the last few months. But regardless of how often it happens, each time is just as scary as the last. It never gets easier or less terrifying.
I feel a hand on my arm. “Harlow , are you okay?” Noah. Of course.
I shake my head and struggle to take in big gulps of air. It’s not working. “Breathe, Little Rabbit. In slowly, then out.”
His voice is oddly soothing, but the fact that he thinks he can talk me out of the panic attack that he created is infuriating. I swallow and jerk my
arm out of his grip. “I’m fine. Just leave me alone.”
It takes everything in me to get those two sentences out, but I manage it. “I’m not leaving you alone when you’re obviously having a panic
attack,” he says.
Everyone is still staring at us–even more so now–and that just adds to my anxiety. I need to get out of here. Somewhere safe, quiet. I have a class in a few minutes, but I’m not sure I’ll make it. I have no choice, though. I’m here on a scholarship, which means I can’t afford to be bumped from any of my classes—and the first week is crucial. Each class is only allowed a certain number of students, and if I’m not there to claim my seat, it’ll be taken by someone else.
I force my spine to straighten, and I suck in a deep, strengthening breath. My heart still feels like a jackrabbit thumping against my ribs, but I do my best to ignore it.
“My next class starts in a few minutes. I have to go.” And with that, I turn toward the social science building without waiting for Noah to respond.
Damn. Day two and I’ve already been nearly assaulted, claimed by the campus king, and had a panic attack. I’m starting to think this school has too much drama for me.
But it’s the only school that offered me a full ride, so I guess I’m stuck here.
I book it to the social sciences building and find a seat in my next class. Once I’m settled in the corner, away from everyone else, my heart rate starts going back to normal. Thank God.
I pull my phone out to text Talia .
Just had a full-on panic attack in front of everyone at the cafe.
She texts me back immediately.
You ok?
I type out my response.
Yeah, better now. We were invited to a sorority party tonight. Come with me?
Considering my anxiety level, I probably shouldn’t be going to a party tonight, but I know it’ll cheer Talia up. Besides, with a couple of drinks in my system, I’ll be fine.
My phone pings. It’s Talia .
Sure. Sounds good. I have to meet someone after class, but I’ll text you later.
I shove my phone into my backpack and try to focus on the professor, who is introducing himself, and for the rest of class, I’m just kind of there. Present, but not really paying attention. All I can think about is Noah. Why am I so transfixed by him? He’s such an asshole, and not only that, he’s surrounded by other assholes. I don’t need that in my life.
The queen of bad decisions. That’s me. I should have told Noah to fuck-off last night. Well, I guess I did, but I didn’t follow it up with the vitriol he deserves—and that’s on me.
At some point, Skye texts me with the information for the party, and I forward it to Talia . One of my classes runs kinda late, so rather than have her wait on me, I suggest meeting her at the party.
It’s dark when my last class lets out. About thirty of us pour out of the social sciences building, dispersing in multiple directions.
“Fancy meeting you here.”
A familiar baritone cuts through the crisp evening air, and I shudder. Not from cold, but from awareness spiking in my veins. Noah Sabastian was waiting for me outside the building. This is the third time being accosted by him today.
I keep walking. “Oh, look. It’s you. How do you have so much time to follow me around? Don’t you have your own classes?”
“My building is next to yours,” he replies, keeping step with me.
The physics building. Hm. Maybe the guy is more intelligent than I give him credit for. Or maybe he’s buying his grades, which somehow seems more likely.
“Didn’t we kinda say everything we needed to say this afternoon?” I huff. “Why are you here?”
“It’s dark. We don’t want a repeat of last night, do we?”
I stop and turn toward him abruptly. “Didn’t you say you took care of that? I mean, the guy is in the hospital, right? Sounds like he’s going to be laid up for a while. ”
“You’re dating one of the Sacred Sons, Harlow . He’s not the only one who’ll come after you.”
“First, and foremost, we’re not dating. So let’s get that clear. Second, why would anyone come after me? Why? I’ve been here less than a week. The only questionable thing I’ve done was attend your stupid ceremony.”
And, seriously, I’m looking for less drama in my life, not more
Noah shoves his hands into his pockets and narrows his eyes at me. “Listen, Harlow , I know this campus. I know the people here. Anyone connected with the Sacred Sons will draw attention.”
I start walking again, and he follows. I’m walking toward my residence hall, which thankfully isn’t very far. “If you run this place–like you claim you do—then can’t you just tell people to leave me alone?”
“It’s not that simple.” His voice is tight. “The only way people will leave you alone is if they see us together. If they know you’re under my protection.”
Jezus. “This is beginning to feel like some weird mafia situation.”
We reach my building, and I open the side door. When he amoves to follow me, I turn on my heel and put my hand out, stopping him, “I’m good, thanks. I don’t think anyone is going to accost me in the time it takes to get to my room.”
Just as I turn back to walk through the door, he grabs my wrist. “Are you going to the party tonight?”
If I say yes, I know he’s going to insist on coming, too. Or at the very least, walk me there.
“It’s been a crazy couple of days, and I’m exhausted. I think I might just go to bed early,” I lie
He nods once and releases me. “Text me if you go out.”
Not a chance .
“Sure, whatever.”
When I get upstairs, I stop by Talia 's room and knock. No answer. Her roommate isn’t even around. Not that I expected Talia to be there. She
probably headed over to the party a while ago. She’d never responded to my last text, but she can be a little scattered, and sometimes she forgets to reply.
Emily is on her bed when I enter. Her side of the room is so much cuter than mine. A couple of days ago, both her parents came to help her move in. Her mom, especially, had fussed over her—helping her set up her desk, and arrange the pictures on her wall. Her dad had set her computer up and made sure she was connected to the wifi, and all that.
I’d watched it all with envy.
No one had ever taken care of me like that. Never. Everything I do, I do alone. I’m an only child, and I’ve lived with my grandmother since I was eleven. And my grandmother loves me, but she’s tired and has a lot of health issues. My dad is nearly nonexistent, and my mom doesn’t give a shit about anyone but herself. So yeah, she’s not coming here to take me shopping and make my side of the room cute. I doubt she even knows I’m here.
“Hey,” I say as I walk in, tossing my backpack onto my bed. “I’m headed over to a sorority party. You wanna join?”
Emily glances up from her laptop. “Um, I mean, I need to get some reading done for class…”
I open my dresser drawer and pull out a pair of jeans and a tank top. We have a shared bathroom down the hall that I could use to change, but going all the way down there is so annoying, so I decide to just dress here. As soon as I shuck the pants I’m wearing, Emily averts her gaze. I tug my jeans on and replace my baby-T with a plain white tank top.
I’m refreshing my makeup when I make my last-ditch effort to convince Emily to join me. “Are you sure you don’t want to come? It might be fun.”
Honestly, I don’t even really want to go myself, but Talia is probably already there, and I really don’t want to walk over alone. Not after what happened last night.
“We could always leave a little early, so you can get your reading done,” I add.
She hesitates for a second, then closes her laptop and sets it aside. “Okay. Maybe just for a little while.”
We’re both ready in about five minutes, and we start heading over to the sorority. It’s only a block away, so it takes us about three minutes to get over there.
The place is a fucking mad house.
The house is beautiful, two stories, and right on the beach. Inside is chaos, though, and as soon as we get there, I text Talia .
I’m here. Where are you?
She doesn’t text back right away, so I leave Emily out on the back patio with a couple of her friends and go in search of Talia .
This place is packed to the gills with hot guys, though, I’ll say that. These guys definitely weren’t at the Burning Crown ceremony last night— which is a point in their favor. The guys here have that chill, beach boy look, which is right up my alley.
Inside, bodies are crushed together, undulating to the rhythm of the music, which is blaring over the din of laughter. As I look for Talia , I grab a drink—a solo cup half filled with cinnamon-flavored whiskey. It tastes like a Red Hots candy and goes down really easy.
I’m three sips in, and already feeling relaxed as I hunt for Talia . But she’s not here. In the span of ten minutes, I’ve looked in every closet and dark corner. I glance at my phone for the millionth time, and there’s still no response from her. Where is she?
I try not to panic, though. She’ll be here. Maybe she met a new friend and she’s just running late, caught up in some random drama. Who fucking knows with her. She’s always been the life of the party, and pretty impulsive. I wouldn’t put it past her to tag along with a group of girls she’d just met.
I don’t see my new friend, Skye, either, so I’m standing alone, just finishing my first drink, when someone sidles up beside me. At first, I don’t even notice. But after a few seconds, I hear a male baritone address me.
“Hey,” he says. “Didn’t I see you at Rush House last night?”
I glance over to see a cute guy with wavy brown hair, dark eyes, and a sweet, wholesome smile. He’s wearing a blue polo and looks like he just stepped off a golf course. I nearly do a double-take, because he looks so out of place here.
“Hi,” I say with a smile, raising my voice so I can be heard over the music. “Yeah, my friend, Talia and I were invited. Are you a member?”
“I’m not supposed to say,” he says with a smile. “I’m Nathan Hearst.”
I nod awkwardly. “Harlow .”
He looks confused and leans in closer to me. His clean, eucalyptus scent envelops me. “I’m sorry, say that again?”
I inch closer to him. “It’s unusual, I know. My mom is weird.” I laugh a little to cut the awkwardness. “It’s Harlow . L-U-X.”
“Oh, Harlow .” His head bobs. “That’s a really cool name.”
“Thanks,” I answer, draining the last of my cinnamon-flavored whiskey. He notices my empty solo cup. “Can I grab you another drink?”
“Oh, thanks. I was drinking the whiskey.” I hand him my cup, and he leaves to refill it. He’s back in under a minute, handing me a fresh cup. I nod, and thank him again, taking a sip.
“You look like you’re searching for someone,” he says, watching the girls in the middle of the room as they twerk against each other.
“Uh, yeah, I’m supposed to meet my friend here. She’s probably on her way,” I say, glancing at my phone. Still no message from her.
“So what are you studying?” he asks.
I tell him what my major is, and we make small talk for a bit—all the while, I’m watching the front door, waiting for Talia to walk through it.
It’s so nice to have a normal conversation with a cute guy, though. I’d almost forgotten what that felt like. All the guys I’ve been involved with over the last couple of years have been both hot as fuck and crazy like a devil—Noah Sabastian included.
This guy is just…normal. And the longer we talk about nothing, the more comfortable I feel. Maybe my luck in guys is actually changing.
Nathan and I are just chatting about nothing when everyone in the house
—and I mean, the entire house—erupts into a roar of excitement. Everyone stomps their feet in a rhythm they all seem to know by heart .
What the…?
Nathan glances at me, and I get the sense he’s trying to gauge my reaction–which, honestly, is just confusion. “Now the party has officially started,” he explains. “The Sons have just arrived.”
#bad omens#noah sebastian#noah sebastian smut#jolly karlsson#nick ruffilo#bad omens smut#nick folio#nick folio smut#noah x reader
27 notes
·
View notes
Text
Threads - Part 14
Explicit (slow burn, 18+ only) - Rings of Power - Gil-galad x OFC (Elf)
Includes S2E8 of Rings of Power - spoilers ahoy!
Gil-galad had only taken a handful of steps when his gaze passed over yet another collapsed building. From the looks of things, it had once been an open, airy shop that had faced directly into the plaza. The roof had caved in, creating dusty shadows, and even his keen eyes might have missed the slumped figure had he not heard the tiny whimper from the darkness.
Eregion has been destroyed; Sauron is gone. And yet, the sun still shines, as the ruined city holds the last thing that High King Gil-galad had ever expected to find.
Themes: #Idiots in love, #love at first sight, #soulmates, #smut with feelings, #fix-it, #everybody lives
Content Warnings: Explicit content (parts 9, 11, and 13), canon-typical violence; loss of parents; grief/mourning. This part contains very brief, light M smut.
Tag List: @morganas-pendragons, @stellar-solar-flare, @the141bandicoot; @inyx-writes44, @melmel-fandom, @hufflepufferine, @shadows-and-flowers, @xcrybaby555x, @bespectacledhuman
Face claim: Keri Russell as Linnea
Part 1 (includes A/N and credits), Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6, Part 7, Part 8, Part 9 (contains smut), Part 10, Part 11 (contains very brief, light smut), Part 12, Part 13 (contains smut)
A/N: Thank you to everyone who responded to my update earlier this week with such kind encouragement! I appreciate all the lovely notes and it helped me feel much better. And now here we are! This chapter opens the second arc of the plot - it's a bit short, but we are setting up for lots of action. Enjoy! -WTT
Part 14
It had been rare in his life that Ereinion had known peace. True, his time as High King had been peaceful for the most part, and he had grown his kingdom significantly over the hundreds of years he had ruled. Yet for himself, there had been little enough of that peace; there had always been problems to solve, matters that demanded his attention.
Not that that had changed. If anything, the demands on his time had grown more numerous over the last five years, with the ever-present threat of the enemy and the need to prepare. The drums of war were loud now, the enemy’s uruk frequently testing their defenses.
But now, there was someone to share those demands with.
Peace, and healing, and rest. Linnea's eyes had promised such when they had first met, and she had kept that promise in every way that a queen and a wife could. As queen, she had taken on a share of his work; she had overseen the logistics of supplying and equipping the growing army, allowing him to focus on strategy and alliances.
Linnea the Good, Círdan had said the singers would name her, and indeed they had done so. She was beloved throughout Lindon, spending hours in the city with the smiths and the weavers and the growers. And in the evening, when they did not have a council meeting to attend, he would often find her in her weaving room surrounded by members of the court or visiting artisans. Everyone wanted to be around her; everyone enjoyed her company.
And as wife, she had brought him the peace of her love, the healing of his lonely heart. The years had passed in the blink of an eye and now there was no imagining how his life might have been without her. Fortunately, he needed to do no such thing.
The sun was barely peeking over the edge of the horizon, and the room was still dim, filled with the greyish light of pre-dawn. But he needed no light to see, not with Linnea in his arms, straddling his thighs with her back against his chest, and her soft, sweet sighs teasing his ear. One of his hands cupped her breast, rolling her nipple between his fingers; the other gently stroked between her legs above where they were joined. She was close to her peak, and her body fluttered around him, a sensation that he knew well after those thousand nights and more that he had promised her.
And peace was perhaps a strange word in this moment. But it was the right word, holding his wife, moving slowly within her. The peace of feeling her pleasure as she surrendered to the touch of his hand, to the thrusts of his body. The peace of her release bringing on his own, that feeling of leaving himself and flowing out.
Not everything. Not yet. Soon, they had said, and that vision of her carrying their child ever lingered in his mind. But those drumbeats of war continued to pound, and both of them clung to the hope that they would know when the time was right.
But that release still made Ereinion groan with satisfaction, made him hold Linnea tighter to him as he panted for air. As it ebbed, he slowly eased them both down on the bed, curling himself around her gently, keeping her close for a few minutes more. The sun was rising, and he cherished the sight of her soft skin, the flawless creamy expanse glowing in the brightening light.
His arm lay around her waist, and he felt her take his hand and twine their fingers together.
“Perhaps we should take a day of rest,” she murmured. “We have trained every day for many months. Perhaps we should remain abed today, and begin again on the morrow.”
Ereinion chuckled, pressing a kiss to the back of Linnea’s shoulder. “Abed for the entire day? However might we pass so many hours?”
She echoed his soft laugh, holding his hand tighter. Such was not a luxury they had, and yet he felt the light stirring of temptation as he had before over the years. And there had been times when responsibility had been able to be set aside; there had been afternoon picnics, daytime excursions together down to the city, nights when they had retired early for a few precious hours of privacy.
And mornings like this one. Mornings when they rose later than accustomed, replete with the joy of loving union.
He pressed another kiss to her shoulder, humming quietly in contentment. “The Pilino Tarí would be bereft without their leader,” he said softly. “And should the High King fail to present himself for practice, others might take such for permission to do the same.”
Linnea mumbled noncommittally, and he chuckled again, freeing his hand to smooth it gently over her hip. “Have I not pleased you?” he murmured, kissing the nape of her neck. “Is that why you wish to remain here, melethel? You are unsatisfied?”
As he’d known they would, his words made her laugh. She rolled over in his embrace, and he smiled as she kissed his lips in an emphatic denial of his teasing.
“You know well that it is quite the opposite, meleth nín,” she whispered. “I am so very satisfied that I cannot possibly move from this bed.”
He loved her. He loved her so much that he oft felt that he could not contain it; there was simply too much to hold inside. Thankfully, he did not have to - he could pour her full of it and she would take everything he had to give, and return just as much.
He kissed her again quickly. Far too quickly, but the minutes were slipping by and they needed to rise. His servants and hers would come soon, and they would have to make haste with their breakfast before it was time to ride out. It was not the first time that that had been the case - but now, as then, he felt absolutely no regret over the need to hurry.
She was worth it. She was worth all of it.
To the outsider’s eye, Lindon sometimes appeared to be nothing more than a great forest, its buildings half-hidden by the trees. Yet the city itself stretched for miles, and its outskirts included several large fields where its armed forces could train en masse.
Five years had been enough time to establish those training camps, and it was one such that they were bound for that morning, as had been the routine for months. Training, often followed by council sessions in the afternoon, or an excursion to Lindon if Linnea needed to meet with the crafters who were supplying the growing army. She could not complain about a lack of tasks, and yet, she knew that Gil-galad was far more occupied even than she.
She glanced to her right where he rode beside her, sitting tall and proud in the saddle. Over the years they had been wed, she had learned that this was where he was most at home; Gil-galad was a soldier, a warrior, at his heart, and his armor sat upon him like a second skin. The reins were held easily in his hand, able to be tightened in an instant if needed, but his mount knew him well. A small shift of his weight, a light tap of the heel, was all that was normally required to guide the horse.
Linnea did not fool herself that she was his equal. Yet the years of practice had grown her skill, especially given that her own horse had been with her nearly the entire time. Súrë was as light of foot as the wind she was named for, a soft grey mare that had been only a year old when Linnea had first come to Lindon. Now in her prime, she and Linnea had learned together, and in doing so had become the best of friends.
The camp was already bustling as it came into view; it made her smile, remembering the reason why they were tardy. It was a continual balance, the demands of ruling with the needs of a marriage - and the two of them had not always been perfect at achieving it. But they had learned, and they had done so together every step of the way.
Training, however, was a separate endeavor.
She met Gil-galad’s eyes briefly, exchanging a soft smile with him before she turned Súrë. Her guards fell in behind her; his would continue on, following him to where the soldiers were drilling in order to receive reports from the officers. After that, he would join the drills, considering it important for his troops to see him practicing alongside them. She agreed entirely, and had made his philosophy her own over the years.
The Pilino Tarí had not waited for her; she would not have expected them to. They were at the far end of the field, and as she cantered up, she watched with pride as they worked: the Queen’s Arrows, formed four years ago and comprised of two hundred of Lindon’s best archers. Afoot, they were still a force to be reckoned with, but their power lay in their horseback training; they could shoot mounted, at speed, decimating the enemy as they galloped forth. Their saddles and tack were specially crafted, carrying additional quivers of arrows on either side in front of the rider’s leg.
They had yet to be tested in battle. Linnea was unsure if she was thankful for that or not - there was only so much they could learn from training. But she had seen the worry in Gil-galad’s eyes when they had first spoken of her forming the company; he had given his consent and his support, and he plainly saw the wisdom in it. As King, his decision was clear; as husband, his heart still fretted.
But she could do no less for her realm. Not after gripping her bow for the first time; not after feeling it sing in her hands when she had shyly taken it to the practice ranges, alone, not even bringing Gil-galad with her. She had sworn her guards to secrecy about her visits; it felt like a private thing, exploring her skill, seeing if her instincts had been right.
It made her smile again for a moment, remembering the pride on Gil-galad’s face when she had finally shown him.
You have a gift for it, beloved.
She brought Súrë to a halt off to the side of the practice area, waiting patiently for a convenient moment to join them. Her leftenants were on the field with the troops; while she might be the commander in name, she had been under no illusion of being qualified to direct the force in a real battle. In time, perhaps, but for the present she had chosen a pair of seasoned veterans to advise her.
Tallagor, her First Leftenant, was first to see her. Second Leftenant Malfin was beside him; he called to her briefly and then turned his horse, riding around behind the archers that were waiting to make their runs across the practice field. It was a wide open span with targets positioned at irregular intervals, as well as boulders and fallen trees and other obstacles. The field was rearranged regularly, forcing the riders to continually adapt and adjust as they would in a real battle.
Tallagor reined up next to her, nodding at her as he did so. “High Queen.”
“On dhea,” she nodded back. “How goes it this morning?”
“Very well. We have already nearly completed one rotation.” He cleared his throat, glancing at her out of the corner of his eye. “Would you care to take the field before we move the targets for another round?”
She liked Tallagor; she liked him enough to give him a wry smile. He was teasing her in his dry way about her tardiness, and she was not above acknowledging it. Súrë snorted, as if she could read her rider’s thoughts, and stamped a foot in impatience.
Linnea chuckled at that, reaching out and stroking the side of Súrë’s neck to settle the horse. “Indeed,” she smiled. “I must train just as the rest of you do. I will join the ranks now.”
The practice field was divided in half, allowing for two riders to proceed simultaneously. At times they would ride in groups, learning how to work together and to avoid members of their own company, but today they were proceeding individually across the field.
The remaining troops, although few enough, would have deferred to her instantly. But Linnea waited like the rest of them, taking her place at the end of one of the two lines. Her guards had taken up positions a short distance away, allowing her as much freedom as they could, and as she joined the line Malfin rode up beside her.
“High Queen,” she murmured. “It is a fine day for training, is it not?”
“It is.” Linnea smiled, keeping the reins loose in her hand and allowing Sure to naturally advance as the line moved. “And I see the company is in good form. My thanks to you both for making a start before I arrived.”
Malfin nodded. “Of course, High Queen. Tallagor and I were speaking this morning; we thought that next week, we might train in the forests as opposed to camp.”
They had done so before, and Linnea nodded her approval. Changing the practice course was helpful, but a real location with all its variables was an excellent training exercise.
“I think full armor as well, then,” she agreed. “Let us make a proper day of it.”
Normally for training, the Pilino Tarí wore light leather cuirasses over long gambesons and leggings; Linnea was in such herself. But for battle they would outfit as full cavalry, as would their horses. If they were going to train in the forests, it was a good time to practice with the extra weight as well.
“High Queen.”
There was little more to say, not with how regularly they saw each other to train. She had up-to-date supply requests and equipment reviews, and there was no need to ask the same questions every day. Instead, Linnea contented herself with watching the troops ahead of her as they proceeded across the field. Malfin stayed quiet by her side; Linnea had always found her restful company, and there were few better with the bow. The Pilino Tarí were in good hands.
It was almost peaceful, despite the nature of the activity. The fury and urgency and heart-pounding danger of a battle could not be replicated on a practice field. Here, the sun was bright; the scents of leather and horse filled her nostrils. She could feel Súrë’s warmth through her leggings. She could hear murmurs of quiet conversation, even laughter.
The last rider in front of her began the course. With a nod, Malfin moved off, allowing Linnea space to prepare for her run.
Linnea took a deep breath, gathering herself. Her bow was held in her left hand, not too tight and not too loose. Her right hand was free to draw and nock her first arrow; that was always part of training, practicing the art of loading the bow while on the move. In battle, the first arrow could be prepared, but afterward, one’s life could depend on how quickly a new arrow could be found and shot.
She touched Súrë’s flanks, and the horse leapt forward.
Three years of practice, for an Elf, was a drop in the sea. And Linnea had spent those years working hard to surrender the comfort of the reins and learn to communicate with her horse through her legs alone. But Súrë had learned well; she nimbly skirted the first of the obstacles - a pile of tall boulders - as Linnea drew an arrow from one of the side quivers and notched it to the bow string. The first target was a long strip of bark on a pole, a short distance from the boulders, and she easily hit it as Súrë passed by.
One down. Many to go.
The targets were not only scattered irregularly, they were also at varying heights. Here, one practically hidden by the long grass, representing a crouching enemy. Here, one high above, an enemy hiding in the branches of a tree. Nothing allowing for routine, everything requiring the rider to adapt and improvise. Tallagor was old, older than Gil-galad even; he was a veteran of many battles, and had offered many good thoughts on how best to train.
Súrë leapt a jumbled heap of logs as Linnea shot for one of the low targets. Her arrow flew wide and she grimaced, but there was no time for that - there were two more targets in quick succession. She hit those and then continued, urging Súrë faster for a better challenge, and the horse was eager for it; she lunged into a gallop, rocketing through the rest of the course at close to her top speed.
At the end of the field, they turned back, running the obstacles once more. And this time, Linnea did not miss one target.
She allowed herself to feel a glow of pride as Súrë slowed to a walk back at the lines of troops that had already finished. It was foolish to expect that she would never miss in battle, but it was a pleasant start to the training day.
Tallagor and Malfin were waiting for her there, and she offered them a smile as she rode up. “I believe we are ready to reset the course. May I - ”
“High Queen.”
Slowly, Linnea turned in the saddle.
She had been distracted. She had not heard the Elf running up, but as he came to a halt, she knew him. He was red-haired, named Vorohil, and she remembered his twin brother Vorohir from her first months in Lindon when they had visited the Havens.
He stopped, looking up at her, and her blood ran cold. There was a hint of trepidation on his face, and her first thought was that there had been some sort of accident during the drills, that Gil-galad had been hurt - but no. She would have felt it if so. Whatever it was, it was not that.
“The High King asks for you,” Vorohil said. “A messenger has arrived from the Greenwood.”
The trepidation made more sense now, although it did nothing to dispel the chill inside her. Vorohil was fearful, although he had given her no specifics. Perhaps he did not know what news the messenger had brought, but he also did not know that it was good news.
“Where is the King?”
“This way, my lady.”
Linnea was ahorse, and Vorohil was on foot, but she kept Súrë to a brisk trot and followed him across the entire length of the camp. To her left she could see the troops continuing to drill, oblivious to whatever news awaited her.
It was hard, in a way, to believe that the news could be dire. Not in the bright, late morning sun; not with how the day had begun.
She saw Gil-galad even before Vorohil stopped. He was standing outside the infantry commander's field tent, and beside him was the messenger from the Greenwood. She knew that, for she recognized Arondir, even though it had been many years since they had seen one another. But he was an Elf, he had changed little; even the sadness in his eyes for his lost love was still just as present.
He bowed to her as she slid off Súrë and came up to them, but she barely noticed. Her eyes were locked on Gil-galad. He was holding a scroll, but he did not offer it to her - and when he spoke, she understood why.
The message was plain enough. There was no need to read it.
“The Greenwood is under siege,” he said. “The enemy has come forth. And Oropher calls for our aid.”
TBC....
#rings of power#gil galad#gil-galad#the rings of power#trop fanfiction#gil-galad x ofc#fanfic#fanfiction#fix it fic#fix it au
39 notes
·
View notes
Text
HAIRCARE tips 🎀
How I changed my hair from having greasy, damaged and "your hair stinks" to having a healthy, hydrated, soft, voluminous hair and getting compliments EVERY DAY
(Like I'm not even exaggerating guys, I really do get compliments on my hair everyday 👀)
Tip#1
Do what works for you
Literally don't listen to someone when they say "Don't wash your hair everyday" "wash your hair everyday" etc honey PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE try it out first!! Self care is all about trial and error it's never going to be linear and I promise you you'll have yourself figured out.
When I used to listen to my mom saying "don't wash your hair everyday it damages your hair" I literally used to wash my hair like 2 times per week and trust me IT DIDNT HELP ME AT ALL.
I switched to washing my hair every other day and my hair has never been any shinier and smoother plus it's getting what it needs!! Washing your hair depends On YOU. Please do whatever works for you
Tip#2
Oil your hair atleast 2 times per week
please I can't stress this enough. Your hair NEEDS food too and oil does that job for your hair.
You can use castor oil, coconut oil, olive oil, almond oil, jojoba oil or best if it's Moroccan oil.
You can mix these up together and use it on your scalp every two times per week and trust me guys your hair is never going to be the same. Feed your hair!!
Tip#3
Regulate blood flow
stimulating blood flow to your scalp will not only give you healthy hair but also ensure hair growth.
(don't be surprised if you start seeing baby hair all of a sudden because I am not lying 👀)
You can use a scalp massager or a derma roller. Derma rollers create tiny incisions to your hair which regulates blood flow delivering the nutrients your hair needs.
If you're using a scalp massager then make sure to lie upside down on your bed and massage your scalp gently for 5-10 minutes every day for BEST results. but it works fine either way.
Tip#4
Rosemary serum
This is my favorite!! And yes honey you can make it at home.
Get two to three rosemary leaves and put it to a boil with water on medium heat ( quantity depends on your container and this serum can be stored for two weeks at max ❤️)
When it comes to a boil strain the water and leave it to cool down then apply it on your scalp and massage it in with a scalp massager.
I used it every night before bed and tell my why my hair grew so much under just 7 months when I had the worst hair growth??? And it made my hair smooth and healthy and Soo ughh!!! I can't even put it into words just know I STARTED GETTING MASSIVE COMPLIMENTS AROUND ME OKAY?
Tip#5
Never leave your hair open while sleeping
Please don't make this mistake. I used to do this and it didn't do me right. It makes your hair extremely frizzy and causes breakage.
Put your hair up on a bun or do a little braid on your hair every single time before sleeping. Not even a ponytail!! A BRAID OR A BUN!! PERIODT! anything that does not leave your hair out.
Tip#6
Use as minimum heat as possible
Don't overwhelm your hair with heat guys. If you think there's alternative that's gonna give you the hairstyle you want without using any heat then use that. Like
Air dry your hair
Use hair rollers (there's tips on TikTok and YouTube to how you can get heatless curls using these)
Tip#7
Trim your ends regularly
Trim your ends every 3 months. It removes split ends reshapes your hair so you're good to go for your next hairstyle.
Also if you have extremely damaged hair and you don't wanna shave your hair off to "start new and fresh" with your hair I recommend trimming your hair ends every three months. I know it's a long and lengthy process ( but so is growing new hair after shaving your hair right?😭)
That way when you get your new and ✨ healthy ✨ hair after getting into hair care, the damaged old hair gottaa have to go ( slowly but surely❤️)
Tip#8
Use hair masks weekly
Hair masks are your best friend. It hydrates and nourishes your hair and best part it defines your natural hair out
My personal favourite is the fenugreek hair mask with banana and egg (I make it at home). Using it weekly to see the most results >>
You can try any hair masks that works for you ❤️
Bonus tip : BE PATIENT WITH YOUR SELF!!
don't overwhelm your hair by overdoing it. Be patient with your hair and care for it just like a you're caring for a newborn baby and it's gonna return all that love back to you ❤️
#advice#haircare#hairstyle#long hair#beautiful hair#confidence#self care#self care tips#girl tips#girl talk#self love#affirmations#girlblogging#it girl#manifestation#lifestyle#mindset#manifesting#self confidence#self improvement#self esteem#beauty tips#just girly things#girlhood#girlblogger#divine feminine#feminine beauty#high value woman#healing
24 notes
·
View notes
Text
These past few days have been wild! We had a bomb cyclone storm with a high wind warning. We saw gusts above 50 mph and conditions typical with a weak hurricane. Trees and power lines were down. The power went out for about half a million people, and we were one of them.
More below
We lost power Tuesday evening. We expected a quick fix and had cheez it’s for dinner thinking it would be over soon. Then we learned a valuable transformer was damaged and the restoration would be much longer.
We still don’t have power. We’ve been eating our dinners from Costco’s food court. The blessing in all of this is that even though our neighborhood sustained heavy outages, the church, McDonald’s and Costco all stayed open.
The nights are the worst. It only got to 56 degrees in our house with no heating when outside it was 44 with a wind chill. I’ve been sleeping with 4 blankets while wearing 5 layers. My bro and mom only needed two blankets. I can’t stand the cold.
We’ve been forgoing showers, laundry and the dishes. We started using paper plates due to the dishwasher not working. I’m running out of clothes.
The real MVP of this event is my thermal underwear. It cuts out the bitter chill from the cold. I was wearing the long sleeve shirt and long pants. The long pants r great because it feels like I’m wearing pajamas in my jeans.
Then on Friday, I did a speech in skagit county to support the upcoming opening of the first clubhouse international clubhouse in that county.
Then I had a stay cation. I booked the hotel two weeks in advance for a killer deal. 153 a night at a four star hotel downtown. I planned it as a fun get away but it suddenly became a necessity. My fam and I used this opportunity to each take a hot shower bc it has been since Tuesday since we had hot water.
It also made me realize we need more emergency preparedness foods than what we have. We have a lot of food that requires hot water like instant noodles and such.
This is a rambling message. I’m grateful for my fam and the community I live in. They had a device charging center at the community center which was lovely.
Now we just wait and see. They originally said power would be back today but it’s looking more like Monday. It went out on Tuesday 😔
30 notes
·
View notes
Text
I just refuse to leave 90 minutes early for what is supposed to be a 40 minute train ride!!!! i’m already heading into an eleven hour shift, it’s maddening to sacrifice my entire sliver of morning to the whims of unreliable transport and it’s maddening to be a little late every day.
#I need to quit my job I need to get a new job I need a different job I need to not have this job I need#I NEED need need to not work 5 nights a week#and I NEED NEED NEED TO MAKE MORE THAN SEVENTEEN DOLLARS AN HOUR#JESUS CHRIST#ok I’m losing it#if the train doesn’t come in 2 minutes I’m gonna punch something or start crying Ahhh 10 am breakdown ahhhh!!!!!!!!
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
As someone who has one of the most demanding jobs in the world and the type of job that requires weird hours and weekends, having friends constantly guilt trip me for not having time to dedicate to them when I barely have time to dedicate a single day to cleaning my apartment or catching up on sleep is my villain origin story
#like i'm sorry i work close to 10 hours a day and multiple weekends and nights in a row#and friends are totally valid in missing me and feeling like i miss out on a lot#but like forcing me to apologize and defend myself multiple times a week is actually as exhausting as work thanks!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#like i don't have time to even get MYSELF the rest or day i need and you want me to dedicate the 5 hour window i have?!?!?!
24 notes
·
View notes
Text
EX-CNCO Musical Output up to and Including June 2024
(presented without comment but with lots of love)
Joel: Diamante
Zabdiel: Chuliera
Richard: Embelesao
Erick: Co-wrote Hipnotizado by Aron Luix-Luix
Christopher: Did a singalong in his car on Kick the other week. #NailedIt #URWelcome
Seriously though, whatever Chris and Erick have got cooking for themselves individually (or even as a duo, who knows at this point?!) I think our collective face is gonna melt off when they finally unleash it...
#spev rambles#cnco#christopher velez#erick brian colon#joel de leon#joel pimentel#zabdiel de jesus#richard camacho#r!ch yashel#it's all happening honestly#chris keeps promising exciting stuff and he NEVER disappoints#he said a few weeks ago something was coming out in 5/6 months so probably around his birthday#god knows that poor lad needs a good rest#they all do#it was a horrible 2023 for them#besides he's been streaming 6-8 hours a night the last few months he's still working full time#and yes if you're gaming for that long through the night it bloody IS a full-time job!!!!!#i bet Twitch doesn't pay their streamers THAT much in subscription/bits commission!!!
22 notes
·
View notes
Text
for like 3 weeks i was wondering why i was sleeping so much and felt listless. and just now I managed to email 3 people and responded to a month old message in the span of an hour because I got back to TAKING MY FUCKIN MEDS..........
#MOTHER FFFFUCKER#to be fair. my doc said I could stop taking them while im on break since i wouldnt need to be constantly pumped on stimulants#im not sure if it was a side effect but i managed to take like 3 different naps in one day and STILL managed to sleep thru the whole night#at least 2 days into my break. the weird thing is i didnt feel more or less rested afterwards. but mentally i think im in a good place rn#to really put the level of awakeness im at rn i feel weirdly confident i could start one piece. also bc of that sick new opening it BANGS#the song is really good and im in love with the animation style. did some digging and it seems one of the lead animators is masato mori#but i could be wrong. it seems he also did some work on mp100 which could explain a lot lol.. he uses smear frames really well to convey#consistent movement and fluidity!!! someone else might have done color design but it works really really well esp with odas style!!#just love the overall vibe and aesthetic and id really love to study it and incorporate a bit of it into my art.. especially the thick#outlines which i think helps to separate characters and objects on screen. though i have to say the style is definitely more suited to#animation bc of the simpleness and smears. maybe that will help me explore shapes and perspective when i draw... i wanna get better#at drawing poses and angles but i have a hard time wrapping my head around space and using perspective guide lines NGHHHH#i wonder if it has to do with my dogshit ability to judge distance. not depth perception but like. judge how far smth is in metres etc#im also wearing an N95 for the first couple weeks back bc of the wave. absolutely NO BODY is wearing a mask its so fucking over#where im sitting ive heard 5 different people coughing probably not into their elbows!!! and im just. head in my fucking hands#there was a kid sitting a couple seats away in class coughing as he pleases and i wanted to grab him in a chokehold so badly. PLEASEE#ive been annoying my family by asking them to mask up and reminding them to bring masks when they go out and showing them news articles#but at least its working bc we ordered some KN95s and my mom is at least taking me seriously so. please dont be afraid to speak up abt your#health. take care of yourself and others however u can!! wear that mask indoors at your maskless friends house!!! stay home when u can!!#im wearing a surgical mask at home too bc my parents have '''a dry throat cough''' and they are so bad at coughing into their sleeves#also im pretty sure dry throat isnt transmissible bc my brother started coughing too so.. i also tested negative but they havent tested yet#im also not a doctor but i have to keep reminding ppl whenever i can that covid and flu work differently. covid is new and too recent to#have nearly as much research done on it. it seems its also compounding so instead of building immunity it weakens the body and spreads to#to other systems which might explain brain fog and muscle weakness. i remember someone early in the pandemic got infected and it messed up#their smell/taste receptors so bad that they cant eat most foods and that stays in the front of my mind when i think abt covid. christ#yapping
46 notes
·
View notes
Text
Currently in love with the relationship between the Grey Wardens and being doomed by the narrative, especially with how the HOF subverts that relationship so here's a 3am rant about it. Enjoy! The wardens are ghosts. They are born by letting go of everything you had before and drinking poison to bind your fate to the darkspawn and promise that your life and perhaps more importantly, your death belongs to them. The whole joining is a terrifying experience, you're drinking the blood of monsters and seeing a corrupt god in your mind and waking up to see those who died around you and being told you'll meet the same fate soon enough you've just been given more time to get there because to sacrifice, to die is a warden's purpose. Even if you survive becoming a warden, your best case scenario is sacrificing yourself to end the blight but it's far more likely you'll die fighting darkspawn or even more likely lose your mind and have to go to the deep roads to be lost and have your death be your last act of defiance in the face of this overwhelming wave of evil waiting to rise again. The best thing that can happen to a warden is to die in a meaningful way because you gave away your life the moment you drank that blood. All you are now is a soldier waiting to die in war and hopefully take the enemy down with you. It is tragic and haunting and noble and so full of grief. Grief for the live you gave behind and for the one you'll never have. Every warden spends every day of their life hoping not for a future or any life for themselves but simply to make their death mean something which is an incredibly interesting mental state and I could go on about how that effects individuals and messes with their values so that corruption is rife but what started this whole thing is Fereldan.
A wonderful post by @sapphim (which I don't know how to cite but I wanna give credit so if there's a way please tell me) discussed how beneficial it was for the wardens that the fifth blight occured in Fereldan and how much they lost by it being solved so soon. To put it simply, they wanted to sacrifice Fereldan as a lost cause and use it as an example of why they wardens shouldn't be neglected. They wanted it to be known of how much of a sacrifice they make an how important their duty by letting the country of Fereldan be an example of what happens when no one is there to do it and that the narrative has doomed everyone, that the world's crimes will be paid for unless someone is willing to be selfless and bear the burden to give the world another chance. Andraste would have been a great warden I'm sure. In the eyes of the warden, Fereldan is tainted just like their blood, it is promised to the darkspawn just like they are, willingly or not it bears the duty that all wardens do and must make the sacrifice they do too. For the greater good. To stop the darkspawn. It's better you having a death that matters than a life that lasts. This is the psychology of the wardens and they are applying those same beliefs to all of Fereldan. Why must they be the only ones doomed by the narrative? There is no surviving this story and there is saving the world there is only killing the darkspawn before it kills you. Thedas is at war with the archdemons and until they're all dead, there is no peace, there is only preparing for the next battle. There is no building a life, no building a country, there is nothing to protect because it is all doomed.
The way duty and sacrifice and the promise of the Grey Wardens must alter their values and perspective on life is fascinating and there is so much to explore here but what's important for this post is that the foundation of their entire order is that they are already dead.
This then brings us to the HOF and cheating death. Duncan is like the grim reaper in Origins the way he comes and snatches your soul at the end of each origin which I honestly love and it ties in so well to the idea that wardens are ghosts given you die in every other version of the story without him but that's the story of all wardens. They all die a symbolic death at the joining so that's okay but then Ostogar happens. Flemeth happens. You should have died. Fereldan should have been lost. Remember, the duty of the wardens is dying not surviving but you did survive, snatched away by a god. Every other warden has died thinking their paying the price for an absent god yet this goddess not only favours you, she changed fate for you. Every other warden throughout history has paid the price but not you. Not Fereldan. You get to cheat the fate while it dooms everyone else. Can you imagine how that must have felt for the other wardens? How much they must hate the hero for stealing the martyr Fereldan was set to be and making all their losses naught but a tragedy when it could have been so much more? Not only did you escape your own death but you stole the value of theirs. You survived which goes against everything the wardens are made for.
Going even further than that, you have the dark ritual where you can actively choose to cheat death again. When every other warden has had to give their life, had to sacrifice and lose and grieve and poison their humanity as they did their bodies, you get to escape it all. Wardens have struggled for decades to have a foothold in Fereldan but you'll go so far as to choose their ruler for them without any consultation. You have been a warden less than a year, ended a battle that they prepared for over hundreds of years and sacrificed more hundreds of years fighting in the past and not only have you defied everything they defined themselves by, you have made them look like fools and decided their fate for them. You have stolen the meaning of the death of every warden, you have stolen their martyrs and the justifications for their actions and by keeping your own life and humanity, by resisting their poison you have made them all look like monsters.
The hero was doomed by the narrative as all wardens are but they rewrote fate, they stole their life back so many times and by surviving, they created a whole new narrative that ruined everything the wardens were built upon. The wardens were made to be ghosts, not heroes. They're meant to die and be remembered nobly so they can be redeemed for they had to do to get there but not you hero. You get to shame us all, don't you?
#I have work in like 5 hours but it is my duty to share my madness with you all#UGH I need to make more warden OCs#I can't fix him but I can become equally corrupt by his side#There are so many ideas in here I can't wait to elaborate on over the next few days/weeks/lifetime#Anyway good night y'all#Also hi Saph it was me thank you for encouraging this#Got a good grade in anon something both normal to want and possible to achieve#GOODNIGHT#dragon age origins#dragon age#ramblings#grey wardens#doomed by the narrative#idk how to tag things but I hope people see this I want to hear ideas#Rubbing my hands together and giggling like a goblin thinking of all the potential warden content#I'M GOING TO BED NOW BYE BYE
24 notes
·
View notes
Text
actually hilarious when i start questioning my autism diagnosis and going "no i must be faking it because i don't experience xyz symptom/meltdowns/etc." and then reflect upon the fact that i don't experience these things because i have very carefully curated my life around avoiding the experiences that trigger these issues. and then as soon as things outside my control start changing and i can't avoid them any more it all comes back lmao
for example, im like "oh well i can hold down a full-time job." okay bestie but also you got fired and/or quit multiple jobs in the past and only managed to keep hold of your first long-term position because they were so desperate to keep staff that they basically refused to let you quit before you got used to it and stopped having meltdowns before every shift. also the NEXT job you got, you've only held down this long because you got to work from home and now they're taking that away you've regressed horribly and have basically lost half your ability to function!! what a surprise! said no one who's been paying attention. (also yes i can hold down a job but i can't simultaneously keep my house clean or open my own mail for some reason even when i AM working from home, but that's normal i'm sure)
#anyways i still haven't heard back about my accommodations meeting and im becoming progressively more unwell and stressed about it#this is the last week of remote working#and i've been sat there like#there's no way they're gonna let me wfh. i probably don't even need it. im just being lazy and dramatic.#im sure EVERYONE is bawling their eyes out daily and lying awake for hours at night in sheer dread of working in the office 5 days a week!
7 notes
·
View notes
Text
ayyyyyyy I set up an appointment for medication this Friday (telemedicine but whatever) and I get to see my former therapist again later this month. I’m kind of excited. More than kind of. Little sad, but I’m lonely and want to talk to someone. He’s a real cool dude. I’m a little worried to trauma dump the last 6 months on him, but whatever, it beats sitting there for an hour feeling like I’m wasting his time and struggling to think of things to say. dang dang dang, I’m excited.
#I’m excited to tell him about my mom’s transplant. less so to mention all my dark moments since we last spoke.#ok so I gotta wait a week for antidepressants and then a couple of weeks for them to take effect#that’s a lot of waiting#especially with how rough I’ve been these last couple of weeks#I probably have more appointments I should schedule but we’ll see#I’ve only been able to sleep sitting up#like the dang elephantman#something about laying down freaks me out#it’s uncomfortable and not very restful and just thinking about sleep gives me anxiety#brains are fucky#oof… now it’s setting in. I’ve got an appointment but it’s 5 days away#5 days of… this. anxiety and distraction and my sick brain#this is my fault#well… no. yes. I don’t want to COMPLETELY beat myself up for it#I should have been managing my mental health better instead of waiting until I spiraled out#I should have been managing my health better in general!#this isn’t sexy to say but I hate my body. I’ve run it down. and it’s going to be so much harder getting back to something semi healthy#but I’m trying now 😕 so maybe that’ll count for something#I’ve been realizing that I really really miss going to the gym late at night#that’s what I need now. been doing these little drives at night to distract myself but having an actual place to go would be much better#BUT! too expensive. need to work and make some money. not excited for that but I needs it. I neeeeeeds money. for burgers. and distractions#this is too rambly. I’m sorry. I thought about counseling and got too excited to talk and talk#I talk too much#you can ignore this#text
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
i need to vent in the tags abt the housemate, and i need to find a new word for this person bc "mate" is much too friendly rn.
#( OUT OF SOULS. )#vent tw#rant tw#negativity tw#( so )#( we all get paid the exact same amount here )#( like our bosses divide the hours so the full-time staffers earn the same amount each month )#( and tomorrow it's my birthday so we planned to go out for sushi )#( last night on the way home from work )#( he tells me: 'you'll have to cover for me on thursday.' )#( me: you mean you can't go? )#( be aware that i said that as firmly as i can manage )#( and he goes: 'no no i can go but i need you to pay for me.' )#( 1) we both earn the same amount of cash )#( 2) he doesn't like sushi. he keeps acting like a fucking martyr over the sushi. )#( 3) it's my birthday dinner )#( 4) he's a grown ass man. he's 36 years old. )#( 5) this is NOT the first time i've given him money )#( and 6) in the next four months we have weeks off work )#( i got so stressed last night and panicked that i didn't sleep. )#( idek what to do anymore. )
8 notes
·
View notes
Text
crimes of the future was sooo much fun actually... not quite on naked lunch level but straight to 2nd in my cronenberg rankings 😏
#i missed another cronenberg movie night a few months ago i think so need to catch up on that one..#we're gonna get thru his entire filmography together or die trying <3 next up is total recall 1990 tho wooohoo#we have a pool of movie recs n randomly select 3 to vote on each week n all our individual ratings are in a shared spreadsheet#yeah we're all autistic. why do u ask#i think ive only missed like 4-5 other movies so im close to filling in all the blanks on my scoreboard..#i should try n do another this weekend maybe in the bg while i draw or smth#but yesss... okay i need to collapse NOW before i have to do another work day running on 4 hours of sleep 😭#early night tmr hopefully so i can be out late at the gym thurs yippeee#goodnight every1#.diaries
3 notes
·
View notes