#I NEED TO ALSO FIND SPACE (AND WEIGHT) IN MY SUITCASE

[bigbrainbiology]

Doodle <3

[kyleoreillylover]

Hotel Room

Summary: After you fail to help Sami and Kevin retain their tag team championships at payback, you expect to be kicked to the curb for not being enough to help them win. But Sami and Kevin find it shocking that you would even think that at all.

word count: 3,229

warnings: mentions of abuse (but not in detail, but roman's an asshole in this), cursing, insecure reader that just needs love.

pairings: Kevin Owens and Sami Zayn x Fem!Black!Reader (platonic), Jey Uso x Fem!Black!Reader (platonic)

tag list: @southerngirl41 @venusesworld @jeysbae @reci1996 @tbonesteakwithasideofmashngrav @hope4more @selena-tyler-564 @saintaquarius

a/n: This was inspired by a ao3 fanfic, and I put my own twist on it. I am obsessed with Kevin and Sami ( been obsessed since 2016 but wbk) need more of them!! wish they didn't split them up into different brands, but we got samijey to curb us lol. Hope ya'll enjoy! (also the pic of sami in the far right corner is just 😩)

From Sami 🩷: Hey…you kinda ran off after the match. I know you like to figure things out on your own and I don't expect you to do anything but know that me and Kevin here for you <3

To Sami🩷: Sami, I need you guys.

From Sami 🩷: You'll always have us, that'll never change. We’re in Room 203.

The empty hotel halls stretched for what seemed like forever, like a silent maze, the only sound echoing being the soft click of your heels against the polished floors.

You nervously wrung your hands together as you dragged your suitcase behind you, the heavy luggage not as heavy as the weight of defeat settling on your shoulders. Every step was painful, a reminder of the bitter loss you suffered earlier in the evening, and the almost non-existent tear stains that were slowly drying on your cheeks a reminder of how scared you were of how Sami and your other friends would react.

That was stupid. Sami wasn't Roman. None of your friends were him. But you couldn't help but feel a sinking sensation in your chest, couldn't help but push everyone away as soon as you came to the backstage area. You couldn't help but think they'd be disappointed in you. And most of all, you feared disappointing Sami and Kevin. Their reassurance meant the world, yet the fear lingered, gnawing at your resolve.

Before you knew it, you reached his hotel room, but your hand hesitated before knocking. What if Sami's response wasn't genuine? What if Kevin thinks your a disappointment? What if, despite Sami’s words, you were just a letdown to them too? What if he was being kind to you to later throw your words back in your face? You contemplated these thoughts as your knuckles hovered, hesitant to tap on the door.

Before you could make a choice to knock on the door or not, the door swung open, and all thoughts fled from your mind the second you saw Sami's handsome face peeking through the slightly ajar doorway, concern etched in his features as his eyes locked onto yours. His brown hues made you stop made you stop mid-breath, freezing you in a mix of relief and uncertainty.

"Y/N." Sami breathed out, eyes scanning over your form, taking in the way expression and the faint traces of tears.

"Sami," you managed, your voice quivering slightly despite your attempts to steady it. You peered up at him, feeling small under his gaze but oddly safe. His caring eyes seemed to dissect your worries without needing any words.

"Come in."

The invitation was gentle, almost tentative, as if he was giving you space to retreat if you needed. You hesitated, unsure of how to react. But the concern in Sami's eyes dissolved any hesitation.

You stepped into the room, Sami's hand on the small of your back was warm like the hotel room, the lights flickering dimly as if mimicking the emotions flickering within you.

Kevin was sat on the edge of the bed, looking up from his phone , concern instantly etched across his face as he saw you standing at the door.

"Come sit down. Where were you? You left so fast that it was like you were never there." Kevin's voice was soft instead of the angry growl you expected it to be as he gestured to the empty space beside him on the bed. Sami quietly closed the door behind you, his eyes never leaving your face.

"I-Im sorry… I needed some air," you mumbled, finally allowing your heavy suitcase to drop to the floor with a thud. You moved towards the bed, sitting down beside Kevin, feeling a lump form in your throat as you avoided looking directly at either man. The air felt suffoacting to you, and you knew lookin them in the eyes and seeing their anger and disappointment would be too much to bear.

You felt the bed dip as Sami sat down beside you, the mattress compressing under his weight. There was a heavy silence that lingered in the room, punctuated only by the subtle sound of Kevin setting aside his phone as he and Sami exchanged a silent look, both agreeing that this was way out of character for you.

Sami's hand landed gently on your shoulder, and you flinched at the unexpected touch, your body tensing as you looked up at him, seeing his brown eyes looking down softly into yours. He quickly retracted his hand, offering an apologetic smile though his concern grew tenfold at your reaction. "Hey, it's okay. You don't have to explain anything if you don't want to. We're just glad you're here," Sami's voice was calm and understanding, void of any hint of frustration or anger.

Your heart clenched at Sami's genuine concern. It was a stark contrast to what you expected—no judgment, no anger. But you knew better than to take things at face value-that's exactly what Roman used to do. You know the game, and you didn't want to be played again.

"I-I messed up," you whispered, your voice trembling with emotions you were struggling to articulate. "I'm sorry."

Kevin tilted his head, eyebrows furrowing in confusion at your words. "For what? The only people who should be sorry are Rhea and JD. It's not like you costed us the match. They did."

You averted your eyes as the memories of the match rushed back, blinking away the emotions threatening to spill over. "But it is my fault. I should've been more focused. I should've done better. I should've been better."

You swallowed hard and took a deep breath, trying to mask the vulnerability that threatened to spill over.

"Y/N…" Sami breathed out so softly that you could've pretended you didn't hear him if it weren't for his warm hand on your face that gently turned you to face him, your body stiffened at the touch, but Sami's hand was so comforting, so gentle, that you couldn't help but lean into it, looking up into his compassionate eyes. There was an understanding there, a depth that made you feel seen in a way you hadn't felt in a long time. "Talk to me. Tell me what I can do to make you feel better. Tell me what's wrong."

"Don't do that." You shook your head, feeling the pressure building inside, the lump in your throat growing larger. "Don't treat me like I'm weak. I can take the punishment."

"Wait, what?" Sami's hand left your cheek and Kevin stood up wide eyed at your statement.

"Did you just say what I think you fucking said?" The growl Kevin let out made you flinch as the man stormed towards you, a fury blazing in his brown eyes. It startled you even more when you realized he wasn't glaring at you, that he wasn't directing his aggression at you, at least in that moment.

Sami's eyes were just as wide, and you felt yourself instinctively shrinking backwards into the bed, as though expecting to get hit. Sami grabbed Kevin by his shirt collar and held him back, a quiet command ringing in the air that had no need for words, even though his eyes told all you needed to know

"What did you mean?" Sami asked gently, ignoring the scowling man in front of him, though the slight anger he tried to hold back in his voice betrayed him. "Y/N, what do you mean?"

Your voice was barely audible as you muttered, "Just…I lost. I have to pay for it now. It's the way it goes."

Kevin's lips curled in anger at your words, and Sami could barely contain himself either, and they took deep breaths, visibly controlling their own emotions before speaking again.

"Sweetheart, you don't have to pay for anything. You did nothing wrong." Sami cupped your jaw, forcing you to look at him, and you could see the anger clouding his usual vibrant irises. "I don't have to guess who made you feel this way, but you don't deserve to be treated this way. You don't deserve to be thinking that this is your fault. This is not your fault."

You waited for the punchline, your expression a mix of pain, sadness, regret and guilt. But it never came.

You looked up at Kevin, noticing his expression had softened as he observed your facial expression intently, searching for something, anything that will reassure you that this isn't true, that you are not the burden you think you are.

Sami's hand on your jaw was warm, and it wiped away a tear you didn't even realize was there. His touch was gentle, so different from what you expected. You were waiting for anger, for disappointment, for something familiar, yet Sami and Kevin were nothing of the sort. They were kind, understanding, and concerned. Sami's voice cut through your thoughts.

"Y/N, listen to me," Sami's voice was insistent yet calm. "Whatever happened out there tonight, whatever you're feeling, it's not your burden alone to bear. We're here for you. You're not weak for feeling overwhelmed or scared. You're not weak for coming to us for help. And you're not weak for a loss you have no fault for."

Kevin's expression softened further as he took a step towards you, his tone much softer than before. "You don't have to pay for anything, okay? We win and we lose together." He sat next to you again, his arm inching towards you hesitely before encircling your shoulders in a protective gesture. "And that's how it goes. We're here to support you, not punish you. We're a team, we're a family, and we will never hurt you."

You looked between Sami and Kevin, feeling the walls you've built around you tremble. Their words held an honesty you hadn't experienced before, a sense of solidarity that contradicted your fears. The tenderness in their actions contradicted everything you were used to. It scared you. But it also made you happy, because it was everything you ever needed.

"I don't deserve this…" You choked on the words, the emotions lodged in your throat making it difficult to articulate your thoughts. "I've always been the weak link… It's always been that way."

Sami's hand on your jaw tightened slightly, not in a forceful way, but in a comforting manner, making you meet his gaze. "Listen to me, Y/N. That is not true. You've never been a weak link, and you never will be. And you know why?"

Sami's hand left your jaw finding yours gently, his fingers intertwining with yours. "Because you are one of the greatest wrestlers I've ever seen in the ring. Your heart, kindness, skill, dedication, no one else can compare to it. And no one has a bigger heart than you, that's why I'm proud to call you my best friend, and I know Kevin feels the same."

Sami gestured to Kevin, and you leaned into his arm as you looked at him, his usual stern expression softened by a hint of concern. His eyes were reflecting empathy and affection, a sight that caught you off guard.

"I know I don't say it a lot," Kevin started, his voice softer than usual, "but what Sami said? It's true." His arm around your shoulder tightened ever so slightly. "You're family. And we would never hurt family for something stupid like a title loss, unlike-"

Kevin cut himself off with an irritated huff, his eyes briefly reflecting an emotion you couldn't quite pinpoint before he recomposed himself. Sami's grip on your hand tightened gently, a silent reassurance as he exchanged a knowing look with Kevin, comforting him as well until he finally composed himself enough to turn back to you. "We love you, okay? I love you, and I can't let you think that you're anything less than the amazing person you are. We've seen you at your best, and we've seen you when you're not okay, and let me tell you, even then, you're badass."

You didn't know how to take it from here. You were not used to receiving such unconditional support and affection since your start in the bloodline. It felt foreign yet strangely comforting. A part of you wanted to believe their words, to let their reassurances seep into your core and heal the wounds of self-doubt that had been festering for so long. So that's exactly what you tried to do.

"Thank you," you murmured, voice thick with emotion. "I… I'm sorry. It's just that.. he used to.."

"You don't need to tell us anything you don't want to." Sami interjected gently, his thumb rubbing soothing circles on the back of your hand. "We understand."

You nodded with a meek smile, squeezing Sami's hand in gratitude. "Thank you for being here for me. I appreciate it more than I can say."

Kevin leaned in, placing a firm hand on your other shoulder. "We've got your back, always. No matter what." His tone held a sense of finality, as if he was making a solemn vow.

You took a deep breath, feeling a weight lift off your shoulders, albeit ever so slightly. Their words was a salve to the wounds you kept hidden for so long. It was a warmth you hadn't felt in ages, a comforting embrace that slowly began to mend the broken pieces of your spirit. You looked at them, feeling gratefulness swell in your heart for having these two by your side.

"Thank you," you repeated, your voice steadier this time. "I… I really needed this."

Sami offered a comforting smile. "Of course. Now how bout you take a hot shower, let off some steam, and we can get some rest? And if you don't feel comfortable rooming with us, we can ask Jey if you can room with him."

You shook your head, a small smile tugging at the corners of your lips. "No, this is good. Thank you, really."

Kevin nodded, a brief smile crossing his features. "Alright then. You need anything else, just ask. We'll be right here."

Before you could rise from the bed, Kevin pulled you down and engulfed you in a tight hug. It was unexpected, but the sincerity in his embrace was undeniable. Sami leaned in, joining the hug, wrapping his arms around both you and Kevin, and you relaxed into their embrace, feeling a sense of security you hadn't felt in a long time. The weight on your chest seemed to ease, and for the first time in a while, you allowed yourself to believe that maybe, just maybe, things would be alright.

As you separated from the hug, a genuine smile adorned your face. " I'll take that shower and get some rest. But thank you, both of you."

They nodded in unison, their expressions reflecting both understanding and determination. "Anytime," Sami said, his voice holding a softness that touched your heart.

You gave one last smile to them before you made your way to the bathroom, and as soon as the shower was turned on Kevin stood up abruptly and faced Sami, his expression hardening into an angry scowl. Sami, observing the sudden change in Kevin's demeanor, rose cautiously, concern etched on his features.

"Kevin, what's going on?" Sami's voice held a tinge of worry as he watched his friend's reaction.

Kevin clenched his fists, his jaw tensing. "I'm gonna beat Roman's ass."

Sami interrupted, his tone urgent as he put his hand on Kevin's shoulder, trying to calm him down. "Kevin, you can't. Not right now."

"Stay out of it, Sami," Kevin retorted sharply. "This is about her. About what he's done."

Sami hesitated for a moment, caught off guard by Kevin's intense emotions. "I know, trust me I know. But we can't just go in there and—"

Kevin interrupted, brushed off Sami's hand and turned to face him, anger seething in his eyes. "Did you know what he was doing to her? Did you know how he treated her?"

Sami's eyes widened in surprise and hurt at the accusation. "No, Kevin. I didn't know. If I had, that would've been the last day Roman would have a career." Sami's voice held a note of defensiveness, hurt that Kevin would even think he'd knowingly allow such mistreatment.

"How could you not know?" Kevin's voice wavered between anger and disbelief. "You acted like everything was normal!"

The accusation stung Sami deeply, and his voice turned raw with emotion. "Because I didn't know, Kevin! I trusted Roman at the time, you know that! I trusted her judgment, you know that! How could you think I'd let her get hurt? How could you think I'd just stand by?"

Sami's voice raised slightly, a hint of frustration surfacing. "And don't you think Jey would've been the first to know? He was in the bloodline longer than me, he's the closest one to her besides us. We both know Jey would've torn Roman apart for even touching her."

Kevin seemed to visibly calm down at Sami's reasoning, though the tension in the room lingered. He ran a hand through his hair, taking a deep breath to steady himself. "I just... I can't stand the thought of someone hurting her, you know? Of him, out of all people, hurting her."

Sami nodded, his features softening with empathy as he placed a hand on Kevins' shoulder. "I get it Kev. My heart was ripped out of my chest the second I heard what she said."

Kevin nodded, his gaze downcast. "Me too. God, I wanted to kill him right then and there. I still do."

Sami looked at Kevin for a moment, the two of them gazing at each other before Sami brought Kevin into a much needed hug that they both needed in the moment.

Kevin slowly returned the hug, his body tense but gradually relaxing in Sami's embrace. Sami held onto the hug for a moment longer before releasing Kevin, hoping to reassure him, while trying to reassure himself.

Sami held onto the hug for a moment longer before releasing Kevin, hoping to reassure him. "I'm scared too, Kev," Sami admitted softly. "But we'll figure this out, okay?"

Kevin nodded, a steely determination glinting in his eyes. "Yeah, we will." He glanced towards the door after a comfortable silence spread between them and the shower stopped running.. "I'm gonna go grab something to eat downstairs."

Sami felt a tinge of suspicion but nodded in acquiescence. "Alright, grab me some food too, I'm going to bed." Kevin nodded and dabbed Sami up before heading out the door.

Once Kevin left, Sami sighed deeply, feeling the weight of the situation settle on his shoulders. He prepared for bed, trying to quell the swirling thoughts in his mind.

Meanwhile, Kevin stepped outside and pulled out his phone, dialing Jey's number. He knew Jey would go ballistic, and that's exactly why he needed him. He was done with Romans bullshit over the past 3 years. His ego, his cockiness, the pain he inflicts on others.

But that pain will mean nothing like the one Kevin, Jey and Sami will inflict on him for hurting you.

[barmykid]

On a new place. Home???

Moving is never easy, no matter how much you convince yourself you’re ready. You think it’s about packing boxes and fitting pieces of your life into neat little compartments, but the truth is, the hardest things to move are the pieces of you that don’t quite fit anywhere anymore. I arrived here with a suitcase full of clothes and a heart I wasn’t sure how to carry.

This place is beautiful, in the way new things always are. People greet me with warmth, like they’ve known me for years and somehow already see the parts of me I’m still figuring out. They’re all brilliant—sharp minds, open hearts, the kind of people who remind you what it feels like to be excited about something again. It’s like standing in a room full of light after living in shadows. They don’t know about the parts of me I left behind, the heaviness that clings to the edges of my smile. I don’t talk about the engagement that ended, the promises that dissolved into the kind of silence that feels like a scream. There are some things you don’t bring up, not when you’re trying to convince yourself you’ve moved on.

I’m healing in the middle of people who have already arrived at their own peace. They laugh with ease, tell stories that don’t have cracks in the foundation. I sit with them, their conversations swirling around me like soft music, and I wonder if I’ll ever feel that light again. I smile, but inside, there’s a pulse of uncertainty. Am I allowed to be broken in a place so whole?

Some nights are harder. It’s quiet here, not the kind of quiet I’m used to—this is the quiet that lets your thoughts breathe, lets the things you’ve been running from catch up to you. I find myself thinking about the version of me that was almost married, almost settled, almost happy. And I think about the version of me that left, the one who chose to walk away even when it felt like I was tearing something open inside myself. That version of me feels distant, like a stranger I’m not ready to meet again.

But here’s the thing I’ve realized about new places and smart, loving people: they don’t need you to be fixed. They just need you to show up. And that’s what I’m learning to do, slowly. To be here, even when I feel out of place. To let their kindness wrap around me even when I think I don’t deserve it.

This is what healing looks like, I think. Not a grand revelation or some neatly tied-up resolution. Just this—the quiet choice to stay, to sit with the mess inside you, and to trust that one day, the ache will fade. And maybe, just maybe, I’ll find my place in the light again.

For now, I’m learning to love the in-between. The space where I’m still figuring things out, still feeling the weight of what was, but also learning to open up to what could be. And there’s something beautiful in that, too. Not in the perfection of it, but in the rawness. The truth of starting over.

[metalnecklace]

There Was Heaven In Your Eyes

Pairing: Javier Peña x Reader (plus size)

Word Count: 3358

Warnings: Canon Typical Violence, Threats of Non-Con, Threats of Violence

Notes: Here’s the first official chapter! Thank you for all the feedback so far. Javi isn’t in the next two chapters as much, but we’ll get there. Also in case anyone missed the tags, the reader is plus sized. She is mentioned as having curves, and later on there is discussion about her weight and clothing issues and whatnot. Other than that the only description of her is that she is female presenting.

Masterlist

Chapter 1

Two Years Earlier

“Fuck,” I groaned, pressing my fingers to my temples.

I had been searching for teaching jobs everywhere, and I meant everywhere. My hands were shaking as I struggled to sort through the piles of ads on my kitchen table, while I tried not to let the mix of sweat and fear bother me while it stuck my hair to the nape of my neck. At that point I didn’t care where I worked as long as I could get out of Canada. Fast.

The idea of starting over scared the shit out of me, but it had to be done. I had worked so hard to climb the financial ladder in order to get to the top of my position, which was huge for a woman in my field, and I had married a wonderful man. My future was laid out for me and wrapped with a shiny bow. Until…

I shook my head and resumed searching, as there was no point strolling down memory lane thinking about what could have been. I had to think about what was going to be.

Finally my eyes landed on an ad.

‘Wanted: Teachers with any experience, preferably English speaking.’

“Any experience?” I thought aloud as my eyes further down the page.

It was short, but sweet. Due to political tensions there was a lack of teachers in Colombia, so they had begun looking elsewhere. The one that specified English speaking ones happened to be in a place called Bogotà. I hadn’t really heard of that place before, but I kept my eye on the news enough to know what they meant by political tensions in Colombia. Everybody knew what they meant.

I didn’t have much time to weigh the pros and cons, and instead rushed to my room to pack my life into the only two suitcases I owned before I could rush off to the airport. I couldn’t seem to fully breathe until I was seated and the airplane finally took off toward my new life. It was a long flight, but I welcomed the newfound safe space where I could finally close my eyes and rest for the first time in what felt like forever.

With my newspaper in hand and my luggage tucked away in a seedy motel, I marched up to the front doors of where I hoped would be my safe haven. Turns out the school wanted to know even less about me than I had been comfortable telling them. They just wanted someone who could keep their head down, remain non judgemental toward the students and their parents, and could do their best when teaching a new language while trying to learn theirs.

It sounded too good to be true, but I couldn’t afford to turn back. I sealed my fate that morning and went about the rest of the day finding a cheap apartment that was within walking distance to my new job.

Within a few months I had started feeling more and more comfortable with my new role as an English teacher in a school that needed discretion and hope more than I did. Many of the parents were involved in situations that I didn’t even want to begin to think about, but their children got to escape and be with their friends while in my care. The only childcare experience I had previous was babysitting my younger sister's children. She was my only family after our parents had died in our teens, but unfortunately life had gotten too busy and outside forces prevented me from seeing her much. It had been at least three years since the last time we had spoken.

My heart ached when I would recognize my nieces faces in the joy and sorrow of my students, but I poured what love I could offer into them and helped them as much as I could.

One of the children in my class had a father who only showed up every once in a while, but the rumours that had spread throughout the faculty were terrifying. He seemed non-threatening, just a little too comfortable talking to the teachers, including myself, at a very close range. Personal space clearly wasn’t his thing, but apparently working for the cartel was. There were whispers that he was one of the higher ups, but I tried to keep my head down and focus on just getting by.

Until one day when he came to pick up his son. He was acting particularly flighty, his eyes shifting every which way. I usually got the chance to tell him how his son had been doing in school, even though I wasn’t sure he fully understood English, but that day he barely said hello. Almost as soon as his car sped off another vehicle pulled up just outside the front doors of the school.

From my classroom windows I could see two men getting out and making their way inside. One was a tall blonde, who looked like he came straight from the states, considering he stuck out like a sore thumb. The other was also tall, though didn’t look it next to his partner, but he definitely fit in more with the locals with his dark brown mop and matching mustache nestled above his plush lips. As they walked through the doors it was hard not to let my eyes linger down the second man’s loose button up that was tucked deliciously into jeans that fit him like a goddamn glove. I definitely didn’t miss the flash of a gun that was held snugly into the back of his pants.

I shook my head the second the door closed behind them, and made my way back to the front of my classroom. I felt ridiculous practically drooling over another man especially after everything that happened, but I just couldn’t help it. Just as I had my thoughts gathered there was a knock at the door. I turned my head and standing in the doorway was the second man I was trying to forget.

“Perdón por la interrupción, Señorita.” (Sorry for the interruption). The mustache was even more impressive up close, as were his lips, and his deep chocolate eyes that I felt could see right through me.

“Lo siento, no hablo español,” I muttered. (I’m sorry, I don’t speak Spanish). I was used to the phrase by now, even though I had picked up some of the language by now I certainly wasn’t anywhere near fluent. But even with this practiced sentence I felt as though my tongue was too thick to wrap around the letters, especially after watching the way his lips formed around each word. My knees felt weak, and not just because of the badge he held in his hand.

“Of course, my apologies,” he said, his voice smooth like hard liquor, with a hint of smoke and gravel, I was almost waiting for the bite. He held up his badge so I could see he was official. “Agent Javier Peña, DEA.”

I felt a weight I didn’t know I was carrying melt off of my shoulders. Drug Enforcement, which meant he wasn’t here for me. At least not in the way I was worried about.

“I’m wondering if you could confirm whether a certain student is in your classroom,” he spoke so gently I felt comforted, but I wasn’t going to give in.

I shook my head. “I’m sorry, sir, but I can’t give that information away.”

He smiled and leaned against the doorway, bringing his head down closer to me. At the nearly intimate movement I could feel a heat creeping up my chest that I knew would blossom into a blush. He knew what he was doing.

“Please, Miss, call me Javi.” I was almost expecting a wink to punctuate his sentence.

“Well, Agent,” I bit back, “I cannot give any information about these students to anybody who isn’t their caregivers.”

I didn’t want to be on this guy's bad side, but I also wanted to keep both the children safe and my job. They weren’t just pawns in the ugly game their parents and government were playing. It was rare that my students had a voice speaking up for them, an advocate for them. When I signed up for the job I was signing up to be just that.

He nodded and dragged his eyes down my body before snapping back up. His jaw was working with frustration over my refusal to back down, but he finally stood back up to his full height.

“Alright then,” he spoke firmly, but still gentle enough that I knew he was more frustrated than angry. “Have a good day.”

He turned to walk away but not before pausing and reaching into his pocket. In between his fingers was a thick card, which he then held out to me. I took the card with his full name stamped along the top, and what I assumed was his number printed along the middle. Even though I had grabbed onto the card he still held it firmly in his fingers, causing me to look up and once again be lost in his dark eyes.

“If you need anything, ever, please do not hesitate to call.”

I bit my lip and nodded. I didn’t miss the way his eyes left mine for a split second to glance at my lips before returning. He nodded back and left. I finally took a deep breath, feeling the stretch of my lungs inflating fully for the first time since I laid eyes on the man.

I returned to my desk and sat down to finish up marking while the remaining students continued their steady chatter while they awaited their parents. The card felt heavy in my hands, but I knew it wasn’t because of the actual weight of the paper. I reached over to the garbage can but hesitated, wondering if it really was the smartest idea to throw away what might be my one lifeline. Almost as if I could sense his eyes on me I looked out the window and saw him watching my classroom before climbing into the passenger seat of his vehicle. With that last glance of Agent Javier Peña I decided better and took out my wallet. I folded his card up as small as I could and tucked it away. I hoped I would never have to call that number, but something told me I couldn’t get rid of it yet.

That evening as I was leaving work I realized I didn’t have a lot of groceries at home. Unfortunately that meant I had to stop at the market, even though it was later than I had wanted. I took too long marking and ended up doing some more stuff around the classroom than I usually get the time to do, but that meant I got carried away. By the time I left there was only one other car in the parking lot other than mine. Everyone else had gone home, I assumed the other car belonged to one of the cleaning staff.

The market was pretty empty, only a few other shoppers moved around with glazed over eyes clearly exhausted from their workday. I absentmindedly threw ingredients into my cart that were easy to prepare quickly that night. I was too exhausted to even think about putting effort into a full meal, grateful that at least the weekend was in a few days.

All of a sudden a cart bumped against mine. I went to apologize even though it wasn’t my fault, but the words died in my throat when I saw who the person was.

“Hola.” The father of one of my students, Luis, the one in the cartel, stood barricading my cart against the shelves in the aisle. His smile was slimy, almost oozing against his face. I didn’t trust him one bit.

“Hi, sorry, I didn’t see you there,” I said, flustered. I tried to move back to get away but he stepped forward with me. The hair on the back of my neck stood up.

“Where do you think you’re going?” His smile grew bigger, taunting.

I shook my head and stepped away from my cart. He stepped to the side of his and pulled back his shirt enough to reveal a gun nestled into the front of his jeans. My hands started to tremble and I found I couldn’t focus on anything but the hint of metal in front of me. He nodded his head toward the exit, and I found myself following him without a second thought, leaving my cart abandoned in the aisle.

He led me out to a car in the parking lot that I recognized immediately as the one that had been at the school when I left. I mentally kicked myself for not recognizing it before, but it was too common of a car to have pinpointed exactly who the owner was, especially since I hadn’t seen anyone inside of it.

I was shoved into the backseat before I had time to think about what was going to happen to me. Luis slid into the driver's seat and took off, tires squealing against the road and into the night. I sat up and tried to get my wits about me, but the sound of a gun cocking drew my attention back to the driver.

“Keep your head down and your mouth shut, mi amor,” he spoke harshly, the nickname making my stomach turn. “Eres toda mía.” (You’re all mine)

I did as I was told, but considered whether getting shot would really be the worst thing, especially compared to whatever he had in store for me. Before I could come to a final decision the car lurched onto a dirt road, away from any street lights or other cars. We were truly going to be alone.

Tears sprang to my eyes but I refused to let him see me cry. It was obvious I was helpless and doomed to whatever fate he had in store for me, but I wouldn’t let him see any amount of weakness. I would become a fortress if I could not fight.

The car finally came to a stop and Luis jumped out, running to get to my door. He threw it open and wrenched my arm out, pulling the rest of me to the ground. My skin stung where it made contact with the rough surface, but he had pulled me to my feet before I could think about it any further.

Before us laid a house that was not modest in the slightest. I had to wonder who it belonged to, considering he would probably wear nicer clothes if he could afford a mansion.

“Vamos mi amor,” he snarled, still tugging me along by my wrist, his grip bruising.

My heart was beating in my ears and I couldn’t feel my legs as they carried me closer and closer to the large wooden doors ahead of us. When we got there Luis pushed the doors open with a bang, startling the men behind them. They turned to us, raising their guns before sighing and lowering them once more.

“Oh, Luis, hija de puta,” one of the men said. (Son of a bitch/whore).

Another stepped over and looked at me. I struggled to keep my head held high under his examination and Luis' powerful grip.

“El Patrón no le gustarà está,” he snarled. (The Boss won’t like this.) “¿Dónde encontraste éste?” (Where did you find this one?)

Luis gripped my arm even tighter, in a punishing amount of strength.

“¿Por qué?¿Estás celoso?” He sneered and pulled me off to the side, toward an open door leading into a dark room. (Why? Are you jealous?)

In the middle of the room was a small bed that clearly had only been used for what I was assuming he wanted to do with me. He threw me onto it, the mattress so thin I could feel the springs under my body, and then he slammed the door. I could no longer hear anybody on the other side.

“Finally, it’s just you and me,” he nearly slurred. His accent was thick as he punched out each word. He climbed onto the bed and over me, pinning my wrists above my head. My nose wrinkled automatically as his pungent smell of body odour and bad breath invaded my senses. “Do you know how bad I’ve wanted this? To touch these curves?”

I was surprised by how strong he was as he held my wrists in one hand and stroked his other hand over my waist. I twisted my body, trying to get away but his hold was like iron.

“You don’t get to get away, I’ve worked hard for this,” he growled and slapped my cheek causing my head to turn sharply toward the thin pillow it rested on. I gasped in shock, my body suddenly going pliant. “Stay still, puta!”

The next thing I heard was the drag of his zipper as a tear slid down my cheek, and then the door busted open causing us both to jump. A gunshot rang through my ears before I felt a thick, warm liquid drip onto my face. My eyes had squeezed shut and refused to open while my whole body shook in fear.

I felt lighter once the body that had been pinning me down had dropped to the side, then onto the floor with a wet smack. I couldn’t stop shaking even then, still not opening my eyes. My breaths were ragged, ripping through my throat and getting caught in choked sobs that I couldn’t hold back any longer.

A hand landed gentle and warm on my cheek.

“Abre los ojos. Open your eyes.” The voice that spoke was unfamiliar, and surprisingly gentle. I obeyed and immediately felt a new flood of fear. I recognized the man, the monster, that knelt beside me stroking my cheek.

Pablo Escobar.

I remember seeing pictures of him in the paper and on my television before moving to Bogotà, and then seeing his face on almost everything else after. Then, he was right in front of my face.

I scrambled to the edge of the bed, trying to put distance between us, ignoring the dead body that was still lying on the floor.

“No hay que tener miedo,” his voice was rough, and rumbled through the room.

“He says there’s no need to be afraid,” another voice, higher and not as threatening, came from the corner of the room. One of the men who had been standing by the front door was still holding his gun, keeping his eyes on Pablo.

Pablo smiled at me, but I didn’t believe him. There were many reasons to be afraid, one of them was still warm and lying on the floor.

“Siento que este idiota te haya traído aquí,” he said looking in the direction of Luis.

“He’s sorry this idiot brought you here,” his translator said.

“¿Que hago contigo?” He looked at me once more, almost waiting for my reply to his question. (What do I do with you?)

I furrowed my brows and looked to the man in the corner.

“He’s unsure about what to do. Luis didn’t follow protocol. One of our lookouts could see that you were in the backseat without a blindfold, meaning you know where this place is.” He took a step toward me, his gun still held tightly. “You’re a liability.”

I shook my head frantically. “N-no I promise I won’t tell anybody, I didn’t really see much. I was too scared and it’s nighttime and I’m new here.” I could feel myself growing more and more hysterical.

Pablo reached down to the floor and lifted up my purse. It must have fallen when I was pushed onto the bed but I hadn’t even noticed. He handed it over to me.

“I heard you’re a good teacher,” he said, hesitating over a few words.

I nodded.

“Tal vez hay un uso para usted después de todo,” he smiled.

(Perhaps there’s a use for you after all.)

[kindred-spirit-93]

Sup, it's me Anon

I actually did have an idea for a webcomic way back. Imagine Hera leaving Zeus with just a suitcase and her loyal attendant Iris, navigating modern Greece and self-reflecting on her life, while Zeus plots to win her back.

This concept draws inspiration from Pausanias's Descriptions of Greece, where Hera crashes the wedding of Zeus to a wooden cult statue of. I envision Hera as a blunt Dorothy-like figure (Golden Girls vibe, with Wendie Malick's voice).

As a young ambitious goddess, Hera declared herself goddess of the starts and the galaxy, experimenting with primal forces—mashing matter under its own weight or flinging it into the heavens.

Despite her formidability, she won Zeus' heart (they had a secret affair, hidden from Rhea while he was still married to Leto) Hera was thrilled to become Queen of the gods but grew disillusioned when Zeus deemed her interest in primordial laws "unfit for a queen." He reassigned her domain to domestic bonds, making her the Goddess of Marriage.

Hera tried to conform but struggled with Zeus' infidelity, which brought her deep embarrassment. Feeling unable to embody her assigned role and domain, Hera dealt with her issues with Zeus' mortal lovers and demigod children by revisiting her old passions, by making constellations (if you know how most constellations are made in mythology you'll get it).

In recent years, Hera has seemingly calmed down, growing apathetic towards the mortals (with whom she always had a complicated reputation). She now believes the rest of the gods should follow suit.

I imagine her reflecting on a lot of thinks, Her foster mother Thetys and her relationship with her actual mother Rhea and her relationship with her husband and sons. (Hera being the favourite child of Chronos will also be very important) She has a salad with Apollo, Aphrodite is her loud daughter in law. She lives with her sister Demeter for a bit (I imagine her to be quite free and open with her sexuality)

I imagine that some gods choose not to have a human form, Zeus gave up and just floats around as a sentient cloud. Mainly because I find the concept of a human looking woman being married to a small cloud funny.

Athena is worried because a bunch of weird creatures and snakes starting to rise from the ground, Hera seems to be too relaxed with that situation.

The underworld basically acts as an office comedy, so imagine the whole underworld to be set up like the Office.

And to make things interesting I imagine Hestia to be an antagonistic (not villainous) figure - dead set on keeping the family unit together

Basically it's a whole shit pot of ideas, and it just felt a bit too ambitious at the time. But those were my ideas

ANON U GIVE ME LIFE!!

i have no idea what i did to deserve this goldmine of asks but im incredibly grateful and super jazzed to see where it goes!

definately need to do more reading (if u have any suggestions or places to start ill be eternally thankful, as of now i read stuff from theoi on study breaks) but i cant promise anything bc i go off of vibes mostly lol

anyway golden girls esque the office sitcom slice of life it is!

im familiar with the crashing the wedding myth (shout out to osp's red for introducing me to greek mythology!) and suggest it be the straw that breaks the camels back;

like shes only *just* reconciled with zeus and maybe theyve even renewed their vows and hes off wooing someone else and she just packs her shit and leaves (i like this better than a grand gesture to win her back at the very end so well start with what was supposed to be a happy ending and watch it go from there)

adore the idea of hera tapping into primordial stuff (anon ur mind is so cool like what) spending time perhaps with the primordials kinda in parallel with how zeus was raised by gaia iirc, maybe she chills with nyx and tartarus and the primordial eros idk regardless

--

perhaps this experimentation and determination to carve a space for herself in the fabric of the world they inherited is what captured zeus' heart (in the mythos he was married to metis first and then themis and then after raping hera they marry in part due to heras shame but i need to go double check on that one. afaik he was ever married to leto.) anyway hera sees it as a power up that could be exactly what shes looking for and agrees to an affair bc she doesnt want to be held down

they is in loooove and its interesting to see their dynamic (as much as i love to dunk on zeus he was the god of fate law and justice etc afterall so id love to see how theyd work with eachother and grow into their domains alongside one another). this leads to their marriage and things slowly start to go down hill when heras experimentation makes him paranoid of her own infideilty (how ironic and hypocritical lol) he seeks to contain her and decrees her domains will be that of a 'traditional' wife and queen and the thrill wearing off.

her escapism is connected to the cosmos and the void she once strived to be a part of. she wishes to be set free of all that chains her down, but in her mind duty is above her own needs (its been drilled into her) and she knows opposing zeus is a losing fight (maybe this is after her attempted coup too so now shes just burnt out and tired of trying. or maybe shes just biding her time whos to say…)

super cool i think to have the goddess of maternity and marriage be conflicted about her own mother(s) and marriage i think its a great way to explore the complexities of both and makes for some commentary and possibly a side of comedy. identity crises hera halleujah amen

--

maybe iris says something in passing one day and shes just like you know waht fuck him and fuck this i too am a daughter of cronos and i inherited this earth as well, i shall do what i please everything and one else be damned. slay i guess lol

hera chooses a human form and stubbornly refuses to go back to her divine one and zeus likes chilling as a cloud except mortals cant see him in that form.. so basically visual comedy of goddess as a human living her best life and zeus in both fondness and exasperation tries to win her back but hes a poofy wisp of air. idk that dynamic has a lot of potential too lol

hera even as a human is still careless of sorts towards mortals (my girl is fighting her own demons aint nobody got time for their drama and shenanigans) but her maternal side comes out every so often when she sees a kid with dreams and less than encouraging environment and guides them behind the scenes in little ways. idk i want to see hera as more than a jealous and petty figure and more complexity in general.

--

i guess her first pit stop would be to hades, her brother hasnt seen her since the end of the titan age so hes shook and skeptical (what did zeus fuck up this time?) and shes like can i crash? *blank stare*

stoic persephone watches them whisper shout about 'order and responsibilities' and shes like u know what im taking u to nyx you two should have some tea and shit talk zeus and u will feel better. heras like bet.

iris and hermes take over the narrative maybe bc i need to see more of them together honestly, hermes gives intel from the heavens and zeus' goose chase and iris is so done with everyones shit but is also very close to hera and tries her best. shes a good friend to hera i like her ^-^

hestia being the family therapist hell yes! then maybe she snaps and tells everone off, hair bursting into flames and things melting around her and everyone agrees to a truce of sorts. idk im working on it

--

also this is what mortal hera looks to me:

(credits to SelahSketches on x) zeus fucked up so hard lol look at my girl!

[123hotel]

Savvy Packing Tips. If you want to become a seasoned traveler, you need to learn how to pack efficiently. Not only will this save you money at the airport by avoiding over-weight limit costs, but you’ll be able to travel lighter while ensuring you still have everything you need. How many times have you packed for a trip or vacation only to discover you didn’t really need or use half of what you brought with you? It’s easy to over-pack or include unnecessary items because you haven’t carefully planned out your trip. Here are a few tips to help you become a savvy packer: Purchase a Travel-Savvy Backpack Whether you plan to check luggage or not, a travel-savvy backpack can help you bring the essentials while saving weight and room in your suitcase. Backpacks will fit into carry on storage compartments while giving you one centralized place for all of the important documents you need throughout your travel. Plus, a backpack just makes traveling easier, freeing your hands and helping you better navigate. This is especially true if traveling Europe with cobblestone roads that will tear up even the highest quality suitcase wheels. When choosing a backpack, make sure you invest in a high-quality travel-ready bag. You’ll end up paying more for it upfront but if you select a high-end bag you’ll never have to buy another one again. You want your backpack to be flexible in size and shape with comfortable straps and even weight distribution. Roll Your Clothes This is a packing hack I discovered years ago and it saves me a ton of space in my bag but it also surprisingly helps decrease wrinkles in a lot of my clothing. Simply roll your shirts and pants into burrito-style packages to save room and fit more into your luggage. Group your Luggage This tip came from an experienced flight attendant who wanted to make sure she got through customs quickly during each leg of her flight. By segmenting your luggage, you are placing all liquid items into separate plastic bags, grouping your luggage by type. This will make it a lot easier if you’re asked to open your luggage for quick inspection through customs. Pack a Pen or Pencil with a Thin Notebook There will be plenty of times you’ll likely require a pen during your travels, including when filling out custom and immigration forms. Pack pens in a Ziploc bag so prevent them from leaking, or bring extra pencils in the event one breaks or snaps. Not only will a pen or pencil be handy when it comes to filling out required travel documents but you can use it to jot down reminders, notes or when asking someone for directions. Choose a Colorful Suitcase This is a great tip, especially when you travel a lot and find that you’re spending a lot of time looking for your luggage on the carousel. By choosing an unusual color or pattern when buying a suitcase, you’ll be able to easily spot it at the airport. And make sure you add a luggage tag to your suitcase that includes your full name and address should you lose your luggage. Pack Chargers with Devices Whenever possible, keep chargers with associated devices. If your luggage is lost or delayed, at least you’ll still be able to use the devices carried in your day bag. Be Careful with Over-the-Counter Medications While certain medications are permitted into some countries, you’ll want to double-check before bringing any medication with you. Some areas, such as Japan, don’t allow common medications like Sudafed into their country. Tape Bottle Lids Tape the lids of bottles closed before travel to protect against potential leakage. Just a piece of masking tape will do the trick and you can easily remove it when you settle in. Also, keep in mind that visiting higher elevation areas like Nepal or North India can cause toiletries to be under pressure; they’ll Expert Travel Insider: Special Report 15 spray when you open them. Plus, those reusable plastic bags will come in handy during your travels. Consider Lithium Batteries If you need to pack batteries, consider lithium as they are lighter

and often last longer. One thing to keep in mind however is that many airlines require that lithium batteries be carried on board and not checked into luggage. Choose Powder Over Liquid Whenever possible, choose powder based options over liquid. This includes things like deodorant and laundry detergent. Powder is a lot lighter and will help you reduce weight. Above all else, don’t pack to capacity. Ideally, you should pack at least a week before you’re set to leave. That way you have time to reconsider items, organize as needed and not be stressed out packing last minute (which will also increase your chances at forgetting something!). So, start packing at least 5 days in advance. Packing is best done modularly. Try to pack in "kits" based on need. If your luggage is even remotely close to capacity, you’ll want to set it on a scale to ensure it’s not over the weight limit. Don’t go into survival mode! Pack only what is necessary. No bloat bags. The last thing you want is to be charged an extra $50-100 at the airport because you failed to double-check weight limits. Also, remember to leave room for souvenirs or gifts you may buy while traveling. Savvy Packing Tips Savvy Packing Tips

[ehotels]

Savvy Packing Tips. If you want to become a seasoned traveler, you need to learn how to pack efficiently. Not only will this save you money at the airport by avoiding over-weight limit costs, but you’ll be able to travel lighter while ensuring you still have everything you need. How many times have you packed for a trip or vacation only to discover you didn’t really need or use half of what you brought with you? It’s easy to over-pack or include unnecessary items because you haven’t carefully planned out your trip. Here are a few tips to help you become a savvy packer: Purchase a Travel-Savvy Backpack Whether you plan to check luggage or not, a travel-savvy backpack can help you bring the essentials while saving weight and room in your suitcase. Backpacks will fit into carry on storage compartments while giving you one centralized place for all of the important documents you need throughout your travel. Plus, a backpack just makes traveling easier, freeing your hands and helping you better navigate. This is especially true if traveling Europe with cobblestone roads that will tear up even the highest quality suitcase wheels. When choosing a backpack, make sure you invest in a high-quality travel-ready bag. You’ll end up paying more for it upfront but if you select a high-end bag you’ll never have to buy another one again. You want your backpack to be flexible in size and shape with comfortable straps and even weight distribution. Roll Your Clothes This is a packing hack I discovered years ago and it saves me a ton of space in my bag but it also surprisingly helps decrease wrinkles in a lot of my clothing. Simply roll your shirts and pants into burrito-style packages to save room and fit more into your luggage. Group your Luggage This tip came from an experienced flight attendant who wanted to make sure she got through customs quickly during each leg of her flight. By segmenting your luggage, you are placing all liquid items into separate plastic bags, grouping your luggage by type. This will make it a lot easier if you’re asked to open your luggage for quick inspection through customs. Pack a Pen or Pencil with a Thin Notebook There will be plenty of times you’ll likely require a pen during your travels, including when filling out custom and immigration forms. Pack pens in a Ziploc bag so prevent them from leaking, or bring extra pencils in the event one breaks or snaps. Not only will a pen or pencil be handy when it comes to filling out required travel documents but you can use it to jot down reminders, notes or when asking someone for directions. Choose a Colorful Suitcase This is a great tip, especially when you travel a lot and find that you’re spending a lot of time looking for your luggage on the carousel. By choosing an unusual color or pattern when buying a suitcase, you’ll be able to easily spot it at the airport. And make sure you add a luggage tag to your suitcase that includes your full name and address should you lose your luggage. Pack Chargers with Devices Whenever possible, keep chargers with associated devices. If your luggage is lost or delayed, at least you’ll still be able to use the devices carried in your day bag. Be Careful with Over-the-Counter Medications While certain medications are permitted into some countries, you’ll want to double-check before bringing any medication with you. Some areas, such as Japan, don’t allow common medications like Sudafed into their country. Tape Bottle Lids Tape the lids of bottles closed before travel to protect against potential leakage. Just a piece of masking tape will do the trick and you can easily remove it when you settle in. Also, keep in mind that visiting higher elevation areas like Nepal or North India can cause toiletries to be under pressure; they’ll Expert Travel Insider: Special Report 15 spray when you open them. Plus, those reusable plastic bags will come in handy during your travels. Consider Lithium Batteries If you need to pack batteries, consider lithium as they are lighter

and often last longer. One thing to keep in mind however is that many airlines require that lithium batteries be carried on board and not checked into luggage. Choose Powder Over Liquid Whenever possible, choose powder based options over liquid. This includes things like deodorant and laundry detergent. Powder is a lot lighter and will help you reduce weight. Above all else, don’t pack to capacity. Ideally, you should pack at least a week before you’re set to leave. That way you have time to reconsider items, organize as needed and not be stressed out packing last minute (which will also increase your chances at forgetting something!). So, start packing at least 5 days in advance. Packing is best done modularly. Try to pack in "kits" based on need. If your luggage is even remotely close to capacity, you’ll want to set it on a scale to ensure it’s not over the weight limit. Don’t go into survival mode! Pack only what is necessary. No bloat bags. The last thing you want is to be charged an extra $50-100 at the airport because you failed to double-check weight limits. Also, remember to leave room for souvenirs or gifts you may buy while traveling. Savvy Packing Tips Savvy Packing Tips

[gadgetrevive]

My DREAM Everyday TechIn a world where every day feels like a technological treasure hunt, I’ve spent the last year perfecting my dream everyday carry for 2024. Each item I’ve chosen has a purpose, a reason for being included, and today, I’m excited to share this carefully curated collection with you. My journey begins with the GTIC 30L Travel Pack, a backpack that stands out from the fifteen others I’ve tried. Its weather-resistant design makes it trustworthy even in the rain, and it distributes weight so efficiently that it feels lighter than it is. You’ll be amazed at how much it can hold as I unpack it.Crafting a perfect everyday carry involves adhering to specific rules. For me, every gadget must charge with USB-C, there are no gimmicks, function trumps form (though having both is ideal), and dark mode aesthetics are a must.Let’s start with the exterior. In the right-hand pocket, I carry the Fagun Mini, a powerful massage gun in a compact form that, of course, charges with USB-C. Also on this side is an AirTag in an ultra-rugged case with a thick braided metal wire, making it hard to cut through. I’ve added a second hidden AirTag within the bag’s inner lining for two-factor security, a tip I picked up from my good friend Technical Gy in India.A dedicated sunglasses pocket is crucial. I use the Rove sunglasses, which fold into a tiny frame but are surprisingly sturdy. Alongside them is my lucky Jetstream pen, a remnant from my high school exam days when I sought the pen with the lowest friction coefficient.On the left side, I have the Chile Series 2 water bottle, which is leak-proof and keeps drinks at their desired temperature. It also features a comfortable lip and a rubber base to prevent clanging. What’s cool about these side pockets is that they’re magnetized and sit flush with the bag when empty.In the front pockets, I keep a bag of my favorite tea and treats for my needy cat, Milo. The numerous pockets in this bag mean I always have space left over, which was one of my criteria when choosing it. It opens completely flat, functioning as a suitcase, which is perfect for hotel stays.The bottom two pockets hold a retractable key holder for my backup keys and a Pokémon Center X Fossil wallet with a Chipolo item finder card, a sleeker alternative to an AirTag. In the main compartment, I keep a Belroy toiletry kit plus, where all my smaller electronics are stored for easy access through airport security.This kit includes the Anker Prime power bank with a massive 27,600mAh capacity and 250W charging power. It’s the hub of my tech system, powering all my gadgets and featuring a built-in speaker for finding it if misplaced. Anker’s ecosystem also includes magnetic charging bases for seamless power bank recharging.I also carry a Maax 100W Universal travel adapter, which combines an adapter and charger with ports for up to four devices, including laptops. This compact device covers all my wall charging needs.For audio, I use the AirPods Pro 2, custom-made with the Mr. Who’s the Boss logo and my team members’ names. While not true Hi-Fi, they offer excellent sound isolation and battery life.I have Zeiss lens wipes for screen cleaning, and my staple Span Ire USB-C cable for all charging needs. A backup SD card, SD card adapter for the iPad Pro, and an ESR CH2 wireless charger that charges my phone, earphones, and Apple Watch simultaneously are also part of my kit.My phone is the Samsung Galaxy S24 Ultra, housed in an ESR case that adds MagSafe compatibility. Despite my preference for circular smartwatches, I use the Apple Watch Series 9 for its life-changing fitness tracking, a feature embraced by my entire team for our fitness challenges.In the second Belroy wash bag, I carry toiletries, including a folding toothbrush, hand sanitizers, and the Gillette Labs razor with a unique, dual-axis movement. The bag also holds items like moisturizer, sunscreen, mini mouthwash, antiperspirant, perfume, toothpaste, and an EpiPen for my severe peanut allergy.

The backpack also accommodates three T-shirts from Theory, shorts that double as swim shorts, and cargo trousers with numerous pockets. The middle compartment holds my socks and underwear.A standout feature is the expandable compartment that transforms the bag from 20L to 30L, perfect for carrying additional items like our camera bag. The Belroy camera sling houses our Sony A7 S3 camera, key lenses, and the Aputure MC Pro light, among other essentials, all charging via USB-C.The back pocket of the backpack opens flat to reveal my iPad Pro 13-inch with the Apple Magic Keyboard and Apple Pencil Pro, my entire workstation away from home. This versatile device supports idea generation, sketching, and even serves as a Netflix machine on flights. Its cellular model ensures fast data connectivity without hotspotting.And that’s my dream everyday carry. Each item has been chosen for its functionality, reliability, and ability to integrate seamlessly into my life. If you enjoyed this deep dive into my everyday tech, perhaps we’ll turn it into a series. Until next time!For more gadgets like the ones mentioned here, check out Gadget Kings at https://gadgetkingsprs.com.au/. They offer a wide range of tech products that can complement your everyday carry setup.

[riku-in-japan]

Day 17 Nakano / Ikebukuro

Last day in Japan. POURING RAIN! Thankfully I had taken notice of this development in advance, so I had decided to leave shopping at Nakano for last. Who doesn't like a shopping mall with a roof on a rainy day?

Of anything Nakano seemed even more desolate than it was four years ago, but it seems at least the mandarake still survives. And to my joy I did find the manga volumes I was still looking for! With that done, we browsed around a bit more, bought too much candy... And tried to arrange to have dinner with my older brother and his family, but... Plans kept changing and... Nothing seemed to work out.

Some time after noon, the rain had stopped. Much sooner than expected. Originally I had planned to go to Ikebukuro, since Sunshine City is a nice and dry mall too, but since the weather had cleared, this wasn't entirely necessary anymore. Though in the end we still went.

So many adorable pokemon statues! Sunshine city clearly changed a bit since I last came there, but for the better.

There was also some kind of anime/figure event space that opened up today (probably), so we checked that out. Then circled around the gacha town, looking for fun.

In the middle of this we realized that forcing to have dinner with my brother wouldn't make anyone happy, so we decided to cancel the family dinner plans. A bit unfortunate. We had hoped to meet up one more time before returning home again.

In the end we ended up at Sukiya's again. My husband had really wanted to eat shabushabu, but... I didn't really feel like going there just with the two of us, so... I hoped the nabe would at least scratch that itch a little for him... (It didn't, though he did like the meal)

After dinner it was time to return to the hotel and pack the last bits. Unfortunately I had to conclude I was completely out of weight space, so even if I made more space space in my suitcase it wouldn't solve the huge amount of random stuff I now had to bring along in my carry-on.

I don't mind stuff in my carry-on, but I do hate lugging multiple bags around to the airport. Unfortunately I had no choice. Even after stuffing some things in my husband's suitcase, I was still left with a rather bulky bag.... Mostly filled with food to eat on the airplane. If I wanted to avoid another case nausea, I was going to need more food than the flight company offers.

(I'm kinda sad the unlimited snacks stand in the back of the plane has disappeared, probably a result of covid? Or because it's deemed too unhealthy? Most of the stuff was sugary...)

After repacking my carry-on multiple times in hopes of decreasing it's size, I eventually gave up to go to bed. Though not before taking a few more photos of the view...

[harrysgoldenline]

Hi lovie 🧡 First of all, let me just say how wonderfully amazing your writing style is. It truly takes my breath away. Keep on writing because this fandom (Harries) needs brilliant people like you to reenact our fantasies. Secondly, I saw that you were asking for requests, so I've got one for you: could you please write something (either a one shot or series) based on friends to lovers trope, where Harry's in love with his friend who's also a poet. It would be marvelous if some scenes took place in Japan, if that's possible. Once again, thank you for your work. Wish you all the best 💐

OMG YOU ARE SO SWEET!!! that is literally the sweetest thing in the whole world. thank you so much love, genuinely. 

Comments are always highly encouraged and appreciated! I love seeing what you guys think of the writing!

Support me and my writing here!

Writing with You

“Y/N, you’re finally here!” You heard Harry exclaim and you drop your bags as you seem him run towards you, literally sweeping you off your feet and spinning you around his rental home.

He had been beginning you to come and visit him and Japan and you could only use work as an excuse for so long until he came up with an elaborate plan, now here you were. 


After a few moments, he sets you back down on your feet, a massive smile on your face as he looks deep into your eyes, “I’m so fuckin’ glad you’re here.” he beamed, reaching down and grabbing your bags and cocking his head to the side as he lead you through the house, “Your room is right across from mine, if that’s alright. If I snore too loud just come in and hit me with a pillow.”

“Happily.” You laughed, giggling up at him as you followed him throughout the home, taking in the space around you, admiring his small touches he added to the rental home, “What have you been up to lately? Anything exciting?”

“Oh, you know just living the rock star life” He winked, setting your suitcase on the bed before laying down on it, extending his arms and making grabby hands at you until you lay next to him, which you happily do, “I’ve been sleeping in, writing, recording and going to bed early.”

“You are such an old man.”

“Hey!” He playfully scolded, fingers digging into your sides, “You menace! I only brought you here because I thought you would be nice to me!”

“Someones gotta keep your ego in check,” You teased, “tell the fans I say you’re welcome for the ‘arrogant son of a bitch’ lyric.”

“Yeah yeah yeah,” He chuckled, shifting his body weight and laying a bit closer, eyes looking deep into yours, faces a mere foot apart at most, “speaking of, have you been writing much lately? I’d love to pick some more out of that beautiful mind.”

“I have a bit,” you blush, sitting up a bit and digging into your backpack, flipping through the pages of your notebook, seeing if anything stands out enough to show him now, but you end up just throwing it on a nearby chair and laying back down with a yawn, “I have stuff, not sure if it’s third album worthy.”

“Oh please,” he started, furrowing his eyebrows at you, sincerity in his eyes, “you are an incredible writer, I love writing with you. I’m sure the studio tomorrow will be magic. But! You need some sleep, you’ve had a long day. Can I get you a snack or drink or anything before bed?”

You shook your head, eyes closing with another yawn and your heart sinks as you feel the weight of the bed shift as he crawls out of bed, eyes fluttering back open and you give him a tired smile .

He smirked, flipping off the switch as he reached the bedroom door, “Sweet dreams, love.”

***

“I am officially mad at you,” Harry said the second you entered back into the studio that was connected into the home that he was renting, to coffees in hand.

“What did I do?” You gasp, handing him his coffee as you plopped down next to him in the studio, taking a long sip as he shook his head at you.

He remained silent, pulling your notebook out of his back pocket and flipping through the pages, his long fingers trailing along them as you could see his lips move, silently reading them to himself. He looked back up at you, closing the notebook and handing it back to you.

“These are all incredible! What do you mean none of ‘em are good enough for the album?”

“Really?”

He smiled and nodded quickly, snatching the notebook back from you as he flipped back through the pages while drinking from his mug. Soon, he hands the open notebook back take you, swallowing the warm liquid as he tapped on the open page, a love poem on the page.

“This one…” he began, “is breathtaking. Most definitely my favorite.”

It’s about you. You wanted to say, looking up at your best friend, but instead you say, “help me finish it? I have some more ideas for lyrics but you are the musical mastermind.”

“I would love to.”

So you two worked together, hours passing as if they were minutes as you huddled together at the piano, thighs pressing together as Harry practiced different melodies, the sound of his voice calming you further.

You couldn’t help but close your eyes as you listened to his voice, humming along where he requested so he could help visualize different melodies. Drifting off into the music, you leaned your forehead against his shoulder. Harry kept playing away at the piano, stopping every few measures or so to scribble away on the sheet music, testing out different melodies and lyrics the two of you pieced together.

“I love this so far…” he whispered, looking at you quickly, “I haven’t felt this excited about a song in so long. Thank you.”

“Harry, you wrote the majority of it!” you laughed, playfully shoving him, “I just had, like, a verse and a half.”

“You inspired what I wrote!” He chuckled, glancing down at you, eyes softening, “in more ways then one.”

Your quickly help your heart beat accelerating slightly, looking up at him wide eyed as you struggled to find the words.

“I mean…” he slowly began, adjusting his body so he was fully facing you, “I mean… your words inspired me to write but… it’s also just you, Y/N… You inspire me.”

His eyes were pleading with you, gnawing on his bottom lip as his hands trembled, praying that you understood what he was saying.

“You inspire me too.”

“Did I inspire this song? Is it… about us?”

You slowly nodded, looking down at your shaking hands, “look, I understand if you don’t feel the same but-“

You were cut off with a kiss, two strong hands grabbing your face as your best friends lips crashed onto yours. You kiss back in an instant, hands coming up to his shoulders, tugging on the hair at the nape of his neck.

“Is this okay?” he asked softly against your lips and the second you nod he’s kissing you again, as if to try and make the years of waiting pay off in a single kiss.

Which he was able to accomplish.

He pulls back slightly, pressing a few soft pecks onto your lips before you two look at each other, a blush covering both of your cheeks.

“So…” he smiles, his fingers dancing over the back of your hand before intertwining your fingers, lifting your hand and kissing it, “will you be mine? Finally?

“Yes.” you smirk at him, a hand coming up to his face as you kiss his cheek before letting out a laugh, “So… you gonna give me writing credit this time?”

Harry let’s out a loud laugh, standing up at the piano bench and throwing you over his shoulder and carrying you back into the house, “I knew I love you.”

[ghostbustermelanieking]

Jmart with 1?

so i made this prompt entirely too complicated. i've kind of had this idea for a while and used this prompt as an excuse to write it lol. i need to put more safehouse fics out in the world, right? also can be found here on ao3

1. things you said at 1 a.m.

It's too cold, after leaving the Lonely. It shouldn't be this bloody cold in London in September—it feels like it's below zero—and Martin's teeth are chattering as they walk back from the Institute. His fingers are freezing. Jon's shivering, too, clutching Martin's hand with both of his, leaning towards Martin as if he is a heater. It feels like they need winter coats, hats and scarves and gloves to block the wind, but the wind isn't blowing at all; Jon Knows, without even trying, that it's really just 10°C outside. 

Martin hasn't completely shaken off the remnants of the Lonely yet. He's out of it, taking long moments to respond when Jon says anything; his eyes are still a faded gray. And he's shaking so hard that Jon can feel the vibrations all the way up his arm. He's tired. He keeps swaying into Jon's shoulder, unsteady on his feet. Hold on, Martin, Jon keeps saying. We'll be home soon. He squeezes Martin's hands. Numbly, slowly, Martin squeezes back. 

They go to Martin's flat, because Jon doesn't have one and the Institute isn't safe. Martin's fingers are numb with cold (Jon Knows without trying), fumbling around his key without getting a good hold on it before Jon reaches for it and asks if he should do it. Martin nods, quiet, and Jon lets them in. 

It isn't any warmer in Martin's flat. Not surprising, as deep as the Lonely had seeped into Martin, but it still hurts Jon a little to see, the cold seeping into his bones. They sit on the couch, vaguely speaking of dinner; Jon isn't hungry, but he knows Martin needs to eat, and so he presses the issue, thinking only of all the times in the beginning that Martin had pressed him to eat or brought him tea. He makes the tea this time, makes it the way he remembers Martin making it once, before the Unknowing, and brings the mugs into the living room. They never do make it to dinner; Martin is quiet, responding numbly, or not at all, to questions, and Jon isn't doing much better. Martin talks of moving to the bed—well, really, he tells Jon to take the bed and Jon says absolutely not, thinks It's your bed and I won't leave you alone —but it never happens. In the end, Martin falls asleep on the couch, his head tipped back against the back of the couch, his mouth half opening, shivering violently in his sleep, his tea going cold on the coffee table. 

Jon finds every blanket in the flat that he can and piles it over Martin, practically cocooning him in them. It's clumsy work; Martin's comforter keeps sliding off, and the afghan from the couch gets tangled in the extra quilts. But it looks warm, and that's all that matters, that Martin is warm. 

(There's fog in the flat, just a little, creeping over the floor. The Lonely is here with them, seeped into both of their bones, but it's sunk deeper into Martin, and all Jon can think is that he won't let him go. He won't let Martin be lost, not again. Not if he can help it.)

There are no blankets left. Jon pulls his own coat over himself, and then—trying not to feel too entirely pathetic—Martin's. It's large and warm, warmer than Jon's own; it smells like Martin, too, Jon's nose pressed against the collar. But Martin isn't gone this time, isn't off somewhere cloaked too heavily in fog for Jon to reach him; Martin is right here. Jon can hear his deep, shaking breaths, feel the comforting weight of him on the opposite side of the couch. 

He fumbles through the layers of coats and blankets and finds Martin's hand again. It is the warmest part of him, as he's falling asleep, his hand in Martin's. 

---

Jon and Martin sleep on the train to Scotland. They're both exhausted, both worn out, and both, somehow, still freezing. They shouldn't be this cold. Jon Knows they shouldn't be this cold. 

Martin's brought blankets, and he insists Jon take one; he's been better today, more there, more… Martin, and he wasn't happy that Jon didn't leave any blankets for himself the night before. Jon's so cold—even in a jumper and a coat, and with the sun coming through the window—that he doesn't argue. (Well. Only a little, only to see Martin's face screw up in mock irritation in a way that might make Jon melt a little inside.) He takes the blanket. It smells like Martin, too. 

They sleep, and Jon wakes up still cold, fingers still freezing, bones aching—except on one side, where he and Martin have slumped against each other, Jon's head on Martin's shoulder, and Martin's head against Jon's. The warmth seeps through the layers of blankets and coats and all of it. 

Jon stays there, leaning heavily into Martin, for a long time after he wakes up, not ready to move away from the warmth.

---

There aren't enough blankets in the safehouse. 

There is only one bed, which helps. One large bed—Daisy must have liked her space. But still: it makes the discussion over blankets easier. (They argue a little over who will take the bed; Martin tries to take the couch, and Jon tries to take the couch, and it begins to get ridiculous. It just makes sense, in the end, to share the bed.) Between the two of them, they pile the sheets, three quilts, and the blankets Martin brought on the bed. It still isn't enough. The bed stays freezing, and Martin stays freezing, too. He's been layering jumpers, scarves, even wooly hats, and pushing the same towards Jon; he looks like someone braving a blizzard, or sick with a cold, and Jon tells him so. He worries, afterwards, that he's crossed the line, made a joke about something distinctly unfunny (reverted back to a version of himself that he'd rather forget), but Martin just laughs a little and says, "If I'd known this would be the effect of working for Peter, I might've invested in more winter clothing." Jon laughs, too, and accepts the scarf and hat when Martin pushes it his way. 

There's a box of firewood out by an old shed. Jon doesn't bother speculating what it might be for. They build a fire in the hearth, that first night, and that helps. Read books they've both packed on the couch, their knees touching through the layers of blankets, and it's the most peaceful Jon's felt in a long time. 

The cold creeps back in, though. Even with the blankets, even with the ancient heating system in the house turned on, even with Martin in the bed with him ( Martin, who Jon has missed tremendously for seven months now). The cold and the fog and all of it; it creeps back in while they are sleeping, when Jon is too distracted to notice. 

He wakes up sometime in the middle of the night, shivering, teeth chattering. There is a quivering in the blankets, a sort of shaking, and Jon knows that Martin is shivering, too. The fog is creeping back in; somehow, the Lonely hasn't left them yet. Jon reaches out and brushes his fingers over Martin's arm; he hisses a little at the contact. One or both of them are as cold as ice; he isn't sure who anymore. 

His mind immediately begins racing, searching for any sort of alternative to the blankets and the jumpers and the socks and scarves. More jumpers in the suitcase, he thinks. The coats. Maybe they can conserve some warmth with the curtains, or some ridiculous thing like that. Anything to keep Martin warm. Somehow, two of the blankets have ended up on his side—Jon isn't sure why—so he attempts to rearrange them, pushing them over to Martin's side, and slides to the edge of the bed, ready to retrieve more things from the suitcase. But Martin's voice, rising blearily, sleepily from the other side of the bed—"J'n?"—stops Jon in his tracks. He hadn't realized that Martin was awake. 

Martin yawns, twisting in the covers, his teeth chattering a few more times. "What… what time s'it?

"1:07 a.m.," says Jon automatically. He shivers hard a few times on instinct, wraps his arms around himself. "I-I'm sorry, Martin, I-I… didn't mean to wake you."

"Mm, wasn' really sleeping anyway…" Martin yawns again, rubbing at his eyes. They look bigger, somehow, without his glasses, dark and soft in the dim light of the room, and Jon loves him so much. 

"I… I wanted to get you more blankets," Jon says, forgetting for a moment that there aren't any others—he revises, "O-or… something else to keep you warm. Something… y-you looked cold, I mean."

Martin blinks a few times in disbelief. Looks out at the blankets at the bed and pulls at the two knit ones from his own flat, like he can't believe they're there. "Jon, you… gave me the blankets back," he says, voice stiff thick with sleepiness. 

Jon chews at his lower lip, shudders all over as another wave of cold hits. "Y-yes, well, they'd… ended up on my side of the bed, somehow, and you… you were cold, as I said, and I…" 

"Jon, I g-g-gave them to you for a reason," Martin says, sounding more awake, and maybe a little fauxly put out; he's clenching his jaw as he talks in an attempt to keep his teeth from chattering. " You're cold, Jon. You were sh-shivering in your sleep!"

It's Jon's turn to blink in surprise now, caught off guard by Martin's words. "Yes, b-but you… you need the blankets more than I do, Martin… th-they're your blankets, and you've been freezing since the Lonely, a-and…" He looks out at the room. He can't see the fog anymore, but that doesn't mean it's gone. "I don't want to lose y—" he starts, stops. Martin might not be his to lose. Amends: "I-I don't want you to be lost, not again, a-and I…"

Martin makes a faint sound of what might be disgust. "This is ridiculous, Jon," he says, and Jon allows himself to worry for a second (Has he gone too far, saying I don't want to lose you, assuming Martin wants this kind of contact, when Martin only said he loved Jon, not love?), before Martin continues: "W-we were both touched by the Lonely… we've both been alone for so long, w-we…" He stops, rubs a hand over his face. Jon can feel him shivering from here, all the way across the mattress. (King sized. Why does Daisy need something this big?) 

Martin lowers his hand. His eyes are wet; Jon can see, and he worries still that he's gone too far. But then Martin's reaching across the mattress, his hand extended towards Jon, and saying, "W-we should just… it'd be warmer if we, um…" 

Jon slips his cold fingers through Martin's; Martin squeezes his hand, so gently that Jon's chest aches a little. He says, his voice soft and sleepy, "... C'mere?" 

Tentative, Jon slides across the mattress, through the nest of blankets towards Martin's broad, soft chest. And then Martin's arms are sliding around him. Martin's embracing him, hands soft and just as cautious against Jon's back. And Jon can't help it anymore; he melts into the embrace. Winds his own arms around Martin, pressing as close as he can physically get (arms around his shoulders, face pressed into his neck). It's easy, too easy, because Martin has been gone for so long and Jon just only now got him back—he's thinking of the tapes and Martin slipping away down the hall, Martin being taken into the Lonely, Martin's voice saying he wouldn't be coming back, and it's all too easy to cling to Martin hard as he can. They're both still freezing, skin chilled to the cut, but… Jon can feel it dissipating. Something warm is growing between them, he thinks. Something. 

"How did neither of us think of this?" Martin whispers. There's a quiver in his voice, just subtle enough that Jon can't tell if he's laughing or crying. "Two days we've been freezing, bundling up, a-and throwing blankets at each other like we're jumping onto a grenade… a-and neither of us thought of this?"

"I missed you," Jon whispers. He hears a sharp gasp from Martin, like he might cry, and it only makes him hold on harder. He's never held Martin like this before, never. (They hugged, before the Unknowing, but that was quick and awkward and over too soon, and Jon had foolishly thought there would still be a chance for this when he came back.) He's never held Martin like this before, but he knows he never wants to stop. He presses his nose against the hollow of Martin's neck and says again, "I missed you, Martin. So much. I… I don't think I can begin to tell you how much." 

Martin takes a few trembling breaths. Ducks his head to press his lips against Jon's forehead—Jon leans into the affection of the touch, the warmth. "I've… missed you, too," he murmurs. "So much, Jon, I… staying away from you, a-after you came back… I thought I'd lost you, a-and it… it almost killed me."

"I'm here," says Jon, "I'm here, you're here," and he kisses Martin at the soft spot under his jaw. Presses closer into the bubble of heat they've created, threads his fingers through Martin's hair and adds, silently, I'll keep you warm. 

When they wake, the next morning, the cold is gone, and so is the fog. Like it was never even there in the first place. 

[heliotropehotch]

Wasteland, Baby - Hotch x fem!Reader

A/N: This is my first criminal minds fic I’m putting out! Im not really sure what this is but I was in need of more hotch fics i’m not gonna lie. tagging @writefasttalkevenfaster​ cause she let me ask her for ideas - also happy birthday Sabina!! This fic is kinda based on a mixture of wasteland, baby by hozier and separate ways by journey. Italics are flashbacks

Warnings: mentions of passed abusive relationship, kidnapping, torture, chained up, arguments, pining, cussing, mentions of sex

Words: 4134

Genre: Angst with fluffy ending

The bullpen of the BAU was quiet but bustling with the soft shuffling of papers and dull thuds of various coffee mugs meeting the hardwood desks. Aaron Hotchner slowly shuffled up the stairs to his office, sighing with the deeper aches of his body. His door shut behind him softly, feeling the weight of the long week catching up with him as his shoulders dropped. He looked over towards the clock on his desk before he trudged to his chair and sat down. 

Strauss had sent over details of a new team member coming to join the BAU for the indefinite future, but Hotch had yet to look over the information before now. Whoever they were, they were expected to arrive at any minute now. He sighed once again, running a calloused palm over his face, fingers pinching at the bridge of his nose. A knock echoed through the room. “Come in,” his voice called out. 

“Uh,” Dave began. “The new one’s here. Garcia’s smothering her with questions.” He chuckled. 

Hotch gave a small smile. “Of course she is.” 

He grabbed the file off of his desk as he made his way to the door of his office. I should at least know their name, he thought, opening the manila folder as he stepped out of the door. 

- - New addition to Behavioral Analysis Unit: Y/N Y/L/N - -

His eyebrows furrowed before his eyes shot up to find the face he hadn’t seen in over a decade. In the flesh, there you were, smiling sweetly at Spencer as he prattled off facts about pathogens of hand shaking. Hotch felt the folder slide from his loose grip and land on the floor with scattered papers and the sharp sound of it hitting the floor. 

Your ears caught the sound, causing you to look around just as his eyes had. Hotch was staring at you, his eyebrows still furrowed with what looked like concern, his mouth slightly agape. 

You met his eyes, and gave a nervous and small grin, raising your hand up in a tentative wave. 

“Aaron, I have to go,” you mumbled, stuffing your clothes into a suitcase. “Y/N, what are you talking about?” Hotch’s panicked voice rang out. He reached for your wrist. “Will you please just tell me what’s going on?” You yanked your hand away from his grasp, taking a hesitant step away. 

“When were you going to tell me about Haley?” you asked softly, staring at your hands. His veins run cold. “Y/N-”

“Were you ever going to tell me?” You looked up at him with angry eyes. “Aaron, I know who she is to you. I know she’s all you’ve wanted since highschool. Was I even given a chance?”

“Y/N, I love you,” his shaky voice rang out as he took a step forward. 

“Don’t do that,” you shook your head, taking another step back, tears well past the point of being held back. “Don’t say it back to me now. You love her more. You always will. I just wish you could’ve told me instead of-”

Your voice choked, “Instead of sleeping with her. That would’ve hurt a lot less.”

“Y/N, please don’t go.” His own face wet with tears. She continues packing her things, with more intention. 

“And why shouldn’t I?” 

He stared at her silently, thinking of words, any words that would make you stay. He knew what they were, but his mouth couldn’t get them out. You had stopped to look at him now, heart hurting as the room fell silent. 

“Right,” you sighed, pulling the suitcase to your feet. “Go get her back Aaron, don’t lose her like you did me.” 

The door to his apartment clicked closed behind you. His hands wiped away his stray tears. 

“God, Hotchner. You’re such a fucking idiot,” as he picks up the photo of the both of you and throws it against the wall. The sound of breaking glass echoed through the space. 

Hotch looked down at his now empty hands and moved to pick up the folder before heading down the steps. He tried to shake the initial shock of seeing you again off but his mind couldn’t help but think, this is gonna hurt like a goddamn bitch. 

“Y/N,” his voice sounded more confident than he was. “It’s been a while.”

“It has,” you spoke out, voice somewhat cold and disconnected. “I look forward to working with you.”

Garcia spoke up, eyeing the tension between the two of you. “Well, Hotch, I was about to come get you with a new case. It’s local.”

“Okay, just head to the briefing room. Agent Y/L/N and I will be there in a second.” Garcia mock saluted as the rest of the team headed up the stairs. 

“Y/N-” Hotch began, but you didn’t give him a chance. 

“Sir,” your bitter voice spoke. “Working under your command will not be an issue for me. If it is an issue for you, I understand.”

“Of course, it’s not,” his voice is soft. “I just think we should eventually have a conversation. I haven’t had a chance to look over your file-”

“You haven’t?” you looked at him with fear. “Sir, there are some things you will read, but it will in no way affect the way I work. Now if you’ll excuse me, I believe we have a briefing.”

Hotch sighed, looking at the file in his hands. His brows scrunched up in confusion, before his natural frown took over his features. Whatever was in there could wait. 

He straightened his back, pushing his shoulders back before quickly walking into the briefing room. “Garcia, what have we got?”

She clicks the remote, herself going a bit rigid at the images on screen. “Starting two weeks ago, six women have gone missing from the DC area. Local police have recovered at least 4 of the bodies in local bodies of water. The victims have large bruises and impressions around their wrists and ankles.”

“Like chains?” You spoke up. “How long between the time the first victim was kidnapped and her estimated time of death?”

“Five days,” Garcia’s sad voice answered. “And it’s been the same with the other bodies. The last victims reported missing were both taken 3 days ago.”

“So we have two days to work with local police before we can expect there to be two more bodies,” Hotch said, sighing at the time limit. “Everyone grab your stuff and we’ll head to the precinct.” 

~~~~

The next day, all of their information gathering, all of their leads, all of their information came to a screeching halt when a woman, with bruises around her ankles and wrists stumbled into the precinct. Her dirt covered clothes and disheveled hair screamed for help as her weak knees fell to the ground. 

Derek ran over to her and kneeled. “Someone get a medic over here!” he shouted. 

Anna Sawyer, 32, a bartender at a local pub had freed herself from chains of the unsub. After walking for hours, she finally got the precinct where she could find someone, anyone to help her. 

“Morgan and Reid are on their way to the hospital to get information about her captor and where she escaped from,” Hotch clicked his cellphone off. 

“What about the other girl? Do we think she’s kept in a separate space?” Prentiss asked. 

“Possibly,” you sighed, making notes on a notepad. “We can’t rule out anything until the boys get answers back.”

“In the meantime,” Hotch huffed out. “Everyone go get some food and meet back in an hour.”

“Y/N,” Emily grabbed your attention. “Wanna go grab a bite with me and JJ? I know a local place with good coffee and sandwiches.” She smiled

“Yeah sure that sounds good!” Grabbing her notepad and cellphone before giving Hotch a brief glance and a curt nod and following them out the door.

Hotch continued to stare, taking his bottom lip in between his teeth and thinking back to the unread personnel file he had on his temporary desk. Dave moved into his line of sight, with a knowing smirk gracing his face. 

“So you gonna tell me what that’s about?” Aaron huffed, moving towards the desk. 

“I knew her in college,” he said, short and sweet. Dave rolled his eyes. 

“And just how well did you know her in college?”

“We were together,” he sighed, gaining a shocked looked on Rossi’s face. “For about a year when Haley and I were on a break.”

“Aaron,” he called for eye contact. “You left her for Haley didn’t you?”

“It’s not like I was given a choice. She found out that I-” he cut himself off, clearing his throat as guilt flooded his veins. “She found out. And she left.” 

“You didn’t go after her?” 

“I couldn’t, Dave,” he sighed, shaking his head. “It was Haley. Everyone just expected me to marry her and I had to become someone I wasn’t.” He looked at the file on his desk. 

“Y/N wasn’t like anyone else. She was good for me, I loved her with so much, but when I saw Haley after so long, I just fell back into the routine.”

Dave sighed, patting his shoulder. “Haley loved you, but you can love more than one person. It’s been almost 3 years since-”

“I know, Dave,” his fingers pressed into the bridge of his nose. “But I don’t know if I can handle losing her too. Although, it feels like I already have. I just don’t know what to do.”

“Maybe you should start by seeing what she’s been up to for the last decade,” Dave pointed to the file. “And then you should talk to her.” Then he walked to the coffee machine.

Hotch let out a sharp exhale of air, sitting down. He stared at the file a few seconds more, before thumbing the folder open. 

~~~~

At the cafe with Emily and JJ, you felt yourself relaxing into the friendships that were to come. You laughed at a joke Emily made about some of the more intense cops you were working with. 

“Thank you guys,” you sighed, taking a sip of your coffee. “You’ve been so nice to me.”

“Of course, Y/N,” JJ smiled. “You’re a part of this team now.”

“Exactly,” Emily agreed. “I do have a question though.”

“Working with a bunch of profilers, I should’ve expected that,” you chuckled. “What do you wanna know?”

JJ and Emily shared a look. “How do you know Hotch?”

You cleared your throat. “We, uh, kinda dated in college,” you admitted with a scrunch of your face. 

“Really? I thought he was only with Haley,” JJ commented, softly with bitter and sad tones. You cringed slightly, knowing of her passing. 

“They were on a break for a while when we were still studying. But we didn’t last longer than maybe a year,” you smiled sadly. “Haley came back and I just didn’t want to compete with his highschool sweetheart. It would’ve been a lost battle.”

Emily smiled sadly. “You still love him don’t you.”

A cold chuckle escaped your mouth. “It’s impossible for me not to. I thought that I’d be fine, ya know working with him. But then he had to go at look at me with those stupid eyes.”

“Aaron!” Your voice laughed out, as his fingers dug into your sides. “Aar- stop!” you giggled out between breaths. Finally his relentless torture stopped, him chuckling at your wild hair and flushed cheeks. 

He leaned down to kiss you, pulling his weight on you and pressing you into the couch. His face cradled your cheeks. He leaned back with a sweet grin, you still pinned underneath him. Your fingers reached up to brush some of his hair out of his face. 

“I love you,” you smiled. His breath hitched, a brief amount of panic flickering in his chocolate eyes. Cradling his face, you continue, “You don’t have to say it back, I know you’re still-”

You sigh, searching his eyes. “I just had to let you know.” 

You try to break eye contact, but his hand brings your eyes back. Without saying a word, he leans down to kiss you again, with more fire, and hands drifting down to your waist to pull you closer to him. 

“You should talk to him,” JJ said, reaching for your hand and interrupting your recollection. “I’ve never seen him look at anyone the way he looks at you. Haley included.”

“You’re sweet JJ,” patting her hand. “I just don’t know if I can do that again. We’ve both been through so much in the last ten years.” 

A sad silence fell over the small table you had been seated at. “Sorry to be such a downer girls,” you chuckled, trying to alleviate the tension. “I’m gonna get another coffee.”

Standing in line you twiddled with your fingers, thinking about the words JJ had said. Aaron had been through so much, it wasn’t fair to want him again. But if he had been looking at you like that- 

“Excuse me,” a gravelly voice spoke up from behind you. “Don’t turn around.” You felt the barrel of a gun pressed into the slope of your lower back. 

“You’re going to come with me and get in my car,” he huffed into your ear. 

“And if I don’t?” you questioned. 

“Then I’m going to shoot the two women you came in with right here and right now between their pretty little eyes. 

“Okay,” your voice shook. “Just don’t hurt them.”

~~~

Aaron leaned back against the desk chair he was seated at, hands covering his face. The guilt that trembled through his body now had new reasons. He would give anything to not be around these people right now. His skin crawled with remorse.

“Aaron?” Rossi called out in question. “What’s in that file?” 

He quickly stood up and pressed the file to Dave’s chest, storming into the nearest room with a door. Rossi followed him, folder open, closing the door behind him. “He fucking hit her, Dave. Her choked her, he slapped her, he-”

Aaron was shaking now. “Hotch, you can’t blame yourself for this.”

“It was her ex!” he shouted. “The one before me! She went back to him because I couldn’t be who she needed and I couldn’t get past expectations well enough to tell her I loved her.”

“Aaron,” Dave spoke calmly. “This was years ago. He’s locked up, and she is as strong as ever. Have you seen the way she’s worked this case? It’s only been two days and she has the fire of any of us. She’s okay now.”

“If it wasn’t for me,” he breathed out, his hands trembling. “Then she wouldn’t have had to go through it in the first place.”

“There is absolutely nothing we can do about that now, Hotch,” his voice tried to sooth, but was interrupted by a phone call. 

“Yeah Prentiss,” he said. Aaron watched as his back straightened, shoulders tensing. “For how long?”

“Right,” his eyes, full of sorrow, reached Aaron’s. “I’ll tell him. Get back to the precinct as soon as you can.” Then he ended the phone call.

“Dave?” Aaron’s worried voice rang out. “Tell me what Dave?” 

“Aaron,” he sighed, looking down at his hands. “She’s gone, Aaron.” 

Hotch stumbled back, all air leaving his body. “He took Y/N.”

~~~~

“Alright what do we know?” Hotch asked sternly, walking into the conference room with the rest of the team. “How did he take her?”

“We were just talking about-” JJ coughed, interrupting Emily. “Things…. And she said she was going to get another cup of coffee. We didn’t see her for a while, so JJ and I started looking around the cafe when we saw her outside being forced into a dark van. By the time we got outside she was gone. I’m sorry, Hotch-” 

“Reid, what did you get from Anna?” Hotch moved on, voice angry. Worried looks darted across the room. 

“It was a similar case, Anna was talking to her friends about trying to get over a guy who liked someone else, on her break and went to get a round of drinks,” he said. “When about 30 minutes went by and she hadn’t come back, her friends assumed she just went home. They didn’t realize she was missing until the next day. Anna said she remembers him holding a gun to her back and saying he would kill her friends if she didn’t go with him.”

“Wait,” JJ stopped. “I think I know how he’s choosing his victims. We need to contact all of the victim’s friends again and find out what they were talking about the night they went missing.”

She looked at the group with a sad, but nervous look. “They were all talking about men they were in love with but couldn’t have.” Hotch coughed as he choked on air. 

“Did Anna remember anything about where she was kept?” Hotch rushed out, urgency taking over. 

“She remembers that she was underground for the most part,” Morgan answered. “When we tried to get her to remember details, she remembers hearing the sounds of cars going over a bridge over water.” 

Emily called Garcia, putting her on speaker. “Garcia, we need you to cross-reference any receipts from the places the victims were last seen. Run any names you find against property with basements near water bridges. Get back to us when you have something.”

“You got it, my goddess divine,” She ended the call. 

“Hotch-” JJ started, but he was already sauntering out of the room. The team looked at each other. “What are we gonna do if we can’t-”

“Then we just have to figure out how to,” Rossi said. 

In the file room down the hall, Hotch was having trouble breathing. He clutched at his tie, ripping it off his neck. Fuck.

~~~~~

“Pet, I don’t know why you’re fighting me so much,” the man taunted as you struggled against the chain and shackles. 

“Maybe because you fucking kidnapped me,” you huffed. He clicked his tongue. 

“Wouldn’t you much rather be with me than a man who doesn’t love you?” He said, hand wrapping around your throat. “Isn’t this better than nothing?”

“Isn’t this better than nothing?” Lucas, your ex said, handing you an ice pack for the bruise blooming across your face. “At least, I love you. I picked you off the floor of your house after he broke your heart.” He wrapped his hand around your throat, your heart rate pulsing. “You could at least say thank you.” 

“Thank you, Lucas,” your voice shook. 

“You’re welcome, babydoll,” he said smugly. “Now go to our room, I need to get off.”

“Nothing is better than being with you,” you spit into his face. He chuckled darkly, wiping his face.

“Little bitch,” he muttered, before punching you in the stomach. “I’ll make you wish you had nothing.”

He walked over to a table nearby, picking up a long blade. You strained against the wall, trying to get away from him. “Normally, I’d wait a couple of days before starting with you. But your time’s a little short,” he chuckled. “I hope you don’t mind scars, my pet. I’ll start small.” He winked. 

The tip of the blade dragged across your chest, stinging with red marks as blood began to surface, before disappearing behind the buttons of your blouse. Your breathing picked up, causing him to chuckle again. “Don’t worry my pet, we’re not there yet.” 

“You motherfucker,” you hissed. “Is that what does it for you? Getting off with girls who would never even look your way?” 

His face became angry. “You women are stuck loving someone who could never love you back,” he hissed. “No one could ever love you back. I’m just here to end your misery.” He smiled wickedly, cutting deeping into your side of your stomach. 

“I get to mark you up with these, with my hands, making the pain stay with you,” he said, tracing your arm with the blade, a long angry line blossoming. “And then when I’m tired of you, I get to watch you die with your last vision being me.” He set down the blade, grabbing a set of brass knuckles. “I’ll make you feel this for weeks, my pet,” he taunted, before landing a hit on your jaw. “Not like you’ll live that long anyways.” 

“The pain I give you will be the only thing you think about until I get to kill you,” his fist landing on your stomach again making it hard to breath. Your vision became spotty and you found it hard to stay awake. 

“Aww poor thing. Too much to handle already?” he teased, holding your lolled head up to look him in the eyes. “Good thing I’m killing you soon, cause nobody’s gonna love you after this.” 

A loud crash came from upstairs. He dropped his grasp on your now sore jaw. “What the fuck,” he said, climbing up the steps. 

“Thomas Wayne! Come out with your hands up!” You heard Hotch’s voice echo from upstairs. You smiled to yourself. 

Aaron aimed the gun right at the head of the unsub, anger and fear vibrated through his body, his skin on fire. Even with the man’s hands in the air, he adjusted his grip, finger tensed to stop himself from shooting him anyways. 

“Aaron,” Rossi grabbed his attention, causing him to turn his head to make eye contact. “Go find her. I’ve got him.”

He quickly dropped his aim and holstered his gun before moving towards the basement door. Thundering of rushed feet resonated through the walls of the dark rooms. “Y/N!” he called out.

“Aaron,” you scratched out, barely audible to his ears. Quickly, he found you, rushing over to get the shackles off your wrists and ankles. You collapsed against his chest, huffing out a sob. His arms held you tightly, trying to avoid any visible wounds. You gasped, pain shooting through your ribs, but that didn’t matter to you right now. You focused on the hands soothing your back.

“Hey, shh,” he cooed. “It’s okay, Y/N, I’ve got you.” His own tears flowing over his face. 

“I thought you wouldn’t come,” you choked out. “I thought he was gonna-”

“I’m never gonna desert you, honey,” he pressed his face into your neck. “I’m so sorry. But he’s gone, okay? I’ve got you. He can’t hurt you anymore.”

“Aaron,” you started, knowing he knew. 

“Hey, it doesn’t matter,” he moved your hair out of your face. “It doesn’t matter cause I’ve got you.” 

~~~~ 

Soon after, you were moved to a hospital to get treated for the cuts and cracked ribs you suffered. Aaron hadn’t left your side the whole time, causing some issues for hospital staff but he really didn’t give to shits. Now as you slept, system full of pain meds, he sat resting his arms next to you, one hand tangled with yours. 

Slowly you woke up, looking around the room before your eyes landed on his. You released your hand from his and rested it on his head, combing through his hair like you used to in college. The sensations startled him into sitting up. 

“You’re awake,” he smiled, grabbing your hand again. 

“You’re still here,” you replied, only kind of surprised. 

“I told you, Y/N,” he said, sitting on your bed. “I’m not leaving you again.”

“Aaron-” you started, squeezing his hand. 

“I love you,” he rushed out, your eyes widening at his confession. “I always have. I lost you once before because I didn’t know how to say it to someone who needed so much more than I could offer. Reading your file-” his voice choked up. 

“So I’m not leaving again. And I’m not letting you leave again. Cause no matter how long I have you, no matter how long my love for you lasts, I’m gonna make sure I don’t fuck it up like I have before. You’re never going to have to go through anything without me by your side. Letting you walk out that door was my biggest mistake, and I’ve regretted not doing something for 10 years. And I’ll live everyday trying to make sure you never feel that way again.”

You sniffled, letting your heart open for the first time in years. Your knuckles were white from gripping his hand. “Aaron, I love you,” you laughed through your tears. His lips met yours slowly, giving you time and space to be comfortable against your healing injuries. His forehead rested against yours, smiles filled both of your faces. 

And suddenly, the end of the world didn’t seem as scary with him by your side. 

[my-emotional-self]

Toxic Love Chapter 16

Pairings: Steve Rogers x Reader, Bucky Barnes x Reader, Steve Rogers x Reader x Bucky Barnes

Summary: Finding out your soulmates were Steve Rogers and Bucky Barnes was one thing. But when someone from your past comes back to haunt you, you have to figure out if a relationship with two super soldiers is something you really want to pursue or if you’d rather go back to your comfortable single life.

Series Warnings: 18+, Swearing, Angst, Fluff, past mentions of rape, self-harm, attempted rape, domestic violence, stalking, death threats, possible Dark!Steve?, Steve will be an asshole a LOT in this series but I don’t know how dark it will get, explicit sexual content, mental health issues, kind of A/B/O dynamics but not really (no they are not actual wolves, more like the hierarchy), mentions of suicide, flashbacks of suicide, nightmares, panic attacks

A/N: There will be no taglist for this story! I apologize in advance!

“Do you have your taser?” Steve and Bucky said collectively as you gathered your purse in your arms and slipped on your shoes.

“Oh my god,” you giggled your response. “Yes, I do.”

It was the day after your surprise birthday party and since you were now going to be heading to St. Lucia tomorrow, you realized you didn’t have much clothing for any kind of tropical place. Darcy had quickly agreed to go shopping with you and that’s why you were leaving the tower.

In the last month you barely left the tower. Not that you felt imprisoned at all. No. It was that you were comfortable. Now that everything was out in the open with Steve and Bucky, you didn’t feel the need to leave the tower much. The last time you left was for your appointment with Dr. Wang and both Steve and Bucky took you there.

They were the ones who normally liked to go with you out of the tower, but since they would be on vacation with you for a whole week, they needed to get some last minute things done for any upcoming missions. So, it would be you and Darcy and you were really excited to spend some time with her.

“Be safe and be good,” Steve said as he gave you a chaste kiss to your lips. You smiled at him, nodding your head.

“I don’t want to get a call that you are in jail,” Bucky joked as he kissed you next.

“It’s only going to be me and Darcy going shopping and out to brunch,” you replied, folding your arms in front of your chest.

“That’s what we’re worried about,” came Steve’s smart ass remark.

~~~

“How many swimsuits do you own?” Darcy asked as the two of you walked down the sidewalk where all the good shopping was. Clint had dropped you two off seeing as neither Steve nor Bucky wanted you two walking that far and you had agreed to stay within a certain radius of where the shopping and dining was. Especially after they found out that John or John’s friends had been sending you threatening letters and messages. But what you didn’t know, was that the bracelet that Steve and Bucky got you for your birthday, also had a tracker in it. They planned on telling you while on vacation, but it brought them a piece of mind and set them at ease while you weren’t with them.

“Umm, I honestly don’t think I even own one,” you remarked.

“Shut the front door. How do you not even own one swimsuit?”

You gave her a shrug. “I don’t know. I guess I just didn’t really have any time or anywhere to go swimming recently. Before meeting Steve and Bucky, I never really got out to do much at all.”

Darcy linked her arm with yours and smiled at you. “Well, I’m glad I’ve met you because now I get some more girl time. With Nat being away on missions more often than Clint, I get stuck with him a lot.”

“Oh come on. You love him and you know it,” you teased back.

She sighed, “I do. I really do. But he is obsessed with going into the vents at the tower and he always wants me to go. He doesn’t realize that I have boobs and a butt that most certainly won’t fit in those vents.”

The two broke out into laughter and you loved how easy it was being around your friend. You didn’t have many friends growing up. With your parents mental health issues, you didn’t want to bring anyone over to the house and when you were invited over for a sleep over or to hang out somewhere else, you always said no because you felt like you had to keep an eye on your parents.

“Oooh, get this one!” Darcy put the slinkiest red bikini in your hands and your eyes grew wide at how little fabric there was.

“Darcy, there is literally nothing to this bikini,” you whispered to her, heat flooding your cheeks at the thought of wearing something like this at the beach.

“That’s the point! You’re on vacation with two of the hottest men in the world whom, by the way, you have wrapped around your finger. And plus, Tony’s place has its own private beach meaning no one else but you three get access to it,” Darcy spoke as she continued to look at more bathing suits. She did have a good point, but you would still feel utterly exposed in something like this. “And we’ll just get you a few more suits for when you want to go to the public beaches.”

“How many suits do you think I should get?”

“Uhh, at least seven. You’re going to be there for a whole week so you need to have one for each day.”

While you had more than enough money in your bank account, you realized Darcy had a major shopping problem and she was to help you drain it dry. At least she offered to buy you lunch today.

The two of you shopped for a few more hours. The sun was shining high in the sky and it felt so good to get fresh air and spend some girl time with Darcy. She helped you pick out a bunch of new clothes including some light weight dresses as she thought all your clothing was too dark and heavy for some place tropical, swim suit cover ups and her personal favorite, lingerie. You didn’t own anything more than a few matching pairs of bras and underwear and they weren’t even lace. Darcy was an expert at lingerie, stating both Natasha and Clint loved seeing her in it.

While you had spent a bit more than you wanted to, you knew it was for something good. Spending an entire week with your two soulmates on a tropical island for a vacation sounded heavenly and you couldn’t wait for it to be tomorrow already. Never in your life had you gone on vacation, let alone a vacation that is fully paid for.

After lunch, the two of you went to Target to pick up some last minute essentials and a few travel sized items. Darcy explained that Tony would have everything covered at the beach house but you just wanted to be on the safe side.

Once done, Darcy called Clint to pick you two up and you headed back to the tower. Your feet were killing you, even though you wore your comfiest pair of shoes. It was a long day on your feet and you couldn’t wait to get this vacation started.

“Honey I’m home,” you sand as the elevator doors opened to your apartment.

Neither Steve nor Bucky were in the living room or kitchen as you walked into the apartment. There was however a note sitting on the kitchen counter for you.

Y/N,

We hope you had fun shopping with Darcy today and we can’t wait to spend the next week with you in paradise. We had a few errands of our own to run and will be back in time for dinner.

Xoxo

Steve and Bucky

While they could have easily sent you a text telling you they would be out for a little bit, you couldn’t help but smile at how old fashioned they were. Honestly, you loved the notes they had left around the apartment for you to find. Sometimes on your pillow when you woke up, or a sticky note attached to your mirror in the bathroom. It was little sentiments like that, that made your heart swell with pride knowing they were all yours.

With your numerous bags in hand, you headed to your bedroom so you can begin packing for your week in paradise.

Dumping your purse and bags on your large bed, you went into the closet and you pulled out the suitcase that Darcy lent you. Hauling the suitcase onto your bed with a grunt, you opened it and admired just how much space there was in the suitcase. At least you didn’t have to pay extra for the large suitcase since you were taking Tony’s private jet.

Just thing, your phone alerted you to a text message. Rummaging it out of your purse, you turned your phone on. The smile instantly wiped from your face. Your blood running cold as you started at the words.

I’ll be seeing you soon babe. I can’t wait to get my hands on your precious body. –J

Your heart began to race. It was getting harder to breathe.

“Miss Y/N,” F.R.I.D.A.Y.’s voice echoed faintly in the room. Your vision started to get blurry and you didn’t know if that was from the tears or if you were having a panic attack. “I am calling Captain Rogers right now.”

Your knees buckled from under you as you reached onto the bed to somewhat break your fall. This couldn’t be happening. How did he get your number? He knew where you used to live, but you had changed your number and made sure to not give it out to anyone. How could he possibly have gotten your phone number? Your breathing was ragged and you were beginning to gasp for air. If he had your phone number, that meant he was closer than ever to you. Closer to finding you. But he was still in prison, he was still locked up. Right?

“Sweetheart,” Steve’s voice came over the speakers. “What’s going on? F.R.I.D.A.Y said your heartbeat is skyrocketing.”

“He-he, John,” you couldn’t get the words out as you were gasping for air.

“Breathe doll,” now it was Bucky’s voice you were hearing. “Just breathe. We are in the elevator right now coming to you but you have to breathe.”

You tried. Fuck did you try to breathe but it was so hard. It felt like someone was squeezing your chest. It hurt. You hurt. Your vision began to go dark as you faintly heard your name being called over and over again.

Slumping down on the ground, you thought this was it. This was how you were going to die. Alone. Terrified. This isn’t how you wanted to die. You wanted to die old and wrinkly with Steve and Bucky by your side, not like this.

Before you could full go unconscious, you felt yourself being picked up in strong arms. Your vision slowly coming back and you realized you were on your bed, sitting down with your back against something hard and firm, yet soft at the same time.

“Y/N? Sweetheart can you hear me?” Steve’s worried voice consumed your mind as you slowly began to blink, seeing him kneeling in front of you on the bed. It was then that you realized you were laying against Bucky, his metal arm around your front and holding your chest tightly to him. “Good girl. There’s our girl. Now I need you to breathe. Feel Bucky breathing behind you. Match his breathing sweet girl.”

You took a few gasping breaths and you could feel Bucky’s heartbeat against your back. Doing as best you could, you could begin to feel your heartbeat starting to regulate. Reaching up, you placed your hand over Bucky’s metal arm, wanting to keep anchored to him.

“F.R.I.D.A.Y, what happened?” Steve’s voice was calm and collected now as he watched you start to finally relax, eyes closed.

“It appears Miss Y/N had a massive panic attack,” the A.I responded.

You could hear Steve take a deep sigh and you opened your eyes, finding his blue orbs staring back at you. “What brought this one sweetheart?”

Instantly your chin began to quiver. “Wh-where’s my pho-phone?” you choked out?

Steve looked around the floor for your phone as you Bucky kept you anchored to him. You felt as if you were to move from your position you would fall apart.

Once Steve found your phone, he handed it to you. You didn’t want to look at it. You couldn’t. Instead, you shook your head and with the saddest voice, you told him to open it.

He looked between you and Bucky and then down to your phone in his hand. You didn’t have a password on it so Steve pressed the button on the side to light your phone up. He didn’t even need to swipe to open. He saw the text. It was right there, staring back at him. Steve’s hand gripped your phone so tight you were honestly shocked he didn’t break the phone in half.

[123hotel]

Savvy Packing Tips. If you want to become a seasoned traveler, you need to learn how to pack efficiently. Not only will this save you money at the airport by avoiding over-weight limit costs, but you’ll be able to travel lighter while ensuring you still have everything you need. How many times have you packed for a trip or vacation only to discover you didn’t really need or use half of what you brought with you? It’s easy to over-pack or include unnecessary items because you haven’t carefully planned out your trip. Here are a few tips to help you become a savvy packer: Purchase a Travel-Savvy Backpack Whether you plan to check luggage or not, a travel-savvy backpack can help you bring the essentials while saving weight and room in your suitcase. Backpacks will fit into carry on storage compartments while giving you one centralized place for all of the important documents you need throughout your travel. Plus, a backpack just makes traveling easier, freeing your hands and helping you better navigate. This is especially true if traveling Europe with cobblestone roads that will tear up even the highest quality suitcase wheels. When choosing a backpack, make sure you invest in a high-quality travel-ready bag. You’ll end up paying more for it upfront but if you select a high-end bag you’ll never have to buy another one again. You want your backpack to be flexible in size and shape with comfortable straps and even weight distribution. Roll Your Clothes This is a packing hack I discovered years ago and it saves me a ton of space in my bag but it also surprisingly helps decrease wrinkles in a lot of my clothing. Simply roll your shirts and pants into burrito-style packages to save room and fit more into your luggage. Group your Luggage This tip came from an experienced flight attendant who wanted to make sure she got through customs quickly during each leg of her flight. By segmenting your luggage, you are placing all liquid items into separate plastic bags, grouping your luggage by type. This will make it a lot easier if you’re asked to open your luggage for quick inspection through customs. Pack a Pen or Pencil with a Thin Notebook There will be plenty of times you’ll likely require a pen during your travels, including when filling out custom and immigration forms. Pack pens in a Ziploc bag so prevent them from leaking, or bring extra pencils in the event one breaks or snaps. Not only will a pen or pencil be handy when it comes to filling out required travel documents but you can use it to jot down reminders, notes or when asking someone for directions. Choose a Colorful Suitcase This is a great tip, especially when you travel a lot and find that you’re spending a lot of time looking for your luggage on the carousel. By choosing an unusual color or pattern when buying a suitcase, you’ll be able to easily spot it at the airport. And make sure you add a luggage tag to your suitcase that includes your full name and address should you lose your luggage. Pack Chargers with Devices Whenever possible, keep chargers with associated devices. If your luggage is lost or delayed, at least you’ll still be able to use the devices carried in your day bag. Be Careful with Over-the-Counter Medications While certain medications are permitted into some countries, you’ll want to double-check before bringing any medication with you. Some areas, such as Japan, don’t allow common medications like Sudafed into their country. Tape Bottle Lids Tape the lids of bottles closed before travel to protect against potential leakage. Just a piece of masking tape will do the trick and you can easily remove it when you settle in. Also, keep in mind that visiting higher elevation areas like Nepal or North India can cause toiletries to be under pressure; they’ll Expert Travel Insider: Special Report 15 spray when you open them. Plus, those reusable plastic bags will come in handy during your travels. Consider Lithium Batteries If you need to pack batteries, consider lithium as they are lighter

and often last longer. One thing to keep in mind however is that many airlines require that lithium batteries be carried on board and not checked into luggage. Choose Powder Over Liquid Whenever possible, choose powder based options over liquid. This includes things like deodorant and laundry detergent. Powder is a lot lighter and will help you reduce weight. Above all else, don’t pack to capacity. Ideally, you should pack at least a week before you’re set to leave. That way you have time to reconsider items, organize as needed and not be stressed out packing last minute (which will also increase your chances at forgetting something!). So, start packing at least 5 days in advance. Packing is best done modularly. Try to pack in "kits" based on need. If your luggage is even remotely close to capacity, you’ll want to set it on a scale to ensure it’s not over the weight limit. Don’t go into survival mode! Pack only what is necessary. No bloat bags. The last thing you want is to be charged an extra $50-100 at the airport because you failed to double-check weight limits. Also, remember to leave room for souvenirs or gifts you may buy while traveling. Savvy Packing Tips Savvy Packing Tips

[ehotels]

Savvy Packing Tips. If you want to become a seasoned traveler, you need to learn how to pack efficiently. Not only will this save you money at the airport by avoiding over-weight limit costs, but you’ll be able to travel lighter while ensuring you still have everything you need. How many times have you packed for a trip or vacation only to discover you didn’t really need or use half of what you brought with you? It’s easy to over-pack or include unnecessary items because you haven’t carefully planned out your trip. Here are a few tips to help you become a savvy packer: Purchase a Travel-Savvy Backpack Whether you plan to check luggage or not, a travel-savvy backpack can help you bring the essentials while saving weight and room in your suitcase. Backpacks will fit into carry on storage compartments while giving you one centralized place for all of the important documents you need throughout your travel. Plus, a backpack just makes traveling easier, freeing your hands and helping you better navigate. This is especially true if traveling Europe with cobblestone roads that will tear up even the highest quality suitcase wheels. When choosing a backpack, make sure you invest in a high-quality travel-ready bag. You’ll end up paying more for it upfront but if you select a high-end bag you’ll never have to buy another one again. You want your backpack to be flexible in size and shape with comfortable straps and even weight distribution. Roll Your Clothes This is a packing hack I discovered years ago and it saves me a ton of space in my bag but it also surprisingly helps decrease wrinkles in a lot of my clothing. Simply roll your shirts and pants into burrito-style packages to save room and fit more into your luggage. Group your Luggage This tip came from an experienced flight attendant who wanted to make sure she got through customs quickly during each leg of her flight. By segmenting your luggage, you are placing all liquid items into separate plastic bags, grouping your luggage by type. This will make it a lot easier if you’re asked to open your luggage for quick inspection through customs. Pack a Pen or Pencil with a Thin Notebook There will be plenty of times you’ll likely require a pen during your travels, including when filling out custom and immigration forms. Pack pens in a Ziploc bag so prevent them from leaking, or bring extra pencils in the event one breaks or snaps. Not only will a pen or pencil be handy when it comes to filling out required travel documents but you can use it to jot down reminders, notes or when asking someone for directions. Choose a Colorful Suitcase This is a great tip, especially when you travel a lot and find that you’re spending a lot of time looking for your luggage on the carousel. By choosing an unusual color or pattern when buying a suitcase, you’ll be able to easily spot it at the airport. And make sure you add a luggage tag to your suitcase that includes your full name and address should you lose your luggage. Pack Chargers with Devices Whenever possible, keep chargers with associated devices. If your luggage is lost or delayed, at least you’ll still be able to use the devices carried in your day bag. Be Careful with Over-the-Counter Medications While certain medications are permitted into some countries, you’ll want to double-check before bringing any medication with you. Some areas, such as Japan, don’t allow common medications like Sudafed into their country. Tape Bottle Lids Tape the lids of bottles closed before travel to protect against potential leakage. Just a piece of masking tape will do the trick and you can easily remove it when you settle in. Also, keep in mind that visiting higher elevation areas like Nepal or North India can cause toiletries to be under pressure; they’ll Expert Travel Insider: Special Report 15 spray when you open them. Plus, those reusable plastic bags will come in handy during your travels. Consider Lithium Batteries If you need to pack batteries, consider lithium as they are lighter

and often last longer. One thing to keep in mind however is that many airlines require that lithium batteries be carried on board and not checked into luggage. Choose Powder Over Liquid Whenever possible, choose powder based options over liquid. This includes things like deodorant and laundry detergent. Powder is a lot lighter and will help you reduce weight. Above all else, don’t pack to capacity. Ideally, you should pack at least a week before you’re set to leave. That way you have time to reconsider items, organize as needed and not be stressed out packing last minute (which will also increase your chances at forgetting something!). So, start packing at least 5 days in advance. Packing is best done modularly. Try to pack in "kits" based on need. If your luggage is even remotely close to capacity, you’ll want to set it on a scale to ensure it’s not over the weight limit. Don’t go into survival mode! Pack only what is necessary. No bloat bags. The last thing you want is to be charged an extra $50-100 at the airport because you failed to double-check weight limits. Also, remember to leave room for souvenirs or gifts you may buy while traveling. Savvy Packing Tips Savvy Packing Tips

[mrspanky]

Could I fondly request Jason comforting the reader who has severe depression? Make it fluffy and stuff, but also sarcastic. If that makes sense?

Empty Spaces, (A Jason Todd x Reader)

Warnings: Language, mentions of depression, and passing out.

Genre: Fluff, comedy, angst.

Authors note: I hope this is comforting! Thank you for requesting this @aviseagle , and I really hope you like it.♡ _______________________________________________

Curiously, you poked around your room in Titan's tower, taking it in for the first time.

This would be a good change for you. You’d been struggling so much on your own, but then Dick had found you and swept you up, and before you knew it, you were the newest member in the tower. Sighing, you tried to relax your shoulders a little.

Your room was so spacious that you could’ve mistaken it for a master bedroom. There was an empty feeling to it. Your minimalistic suitcase was not going to fill all of this space. You furrowed your eyebrows in sadness, wishing there was someone you could ask to go shopping with for some decor that might make it feel a little more like your own. Unfortunately, you hardly knew anyone here at all.

Adjusting is always hard, and you weren’t excited for the period of being “the new kid” that you were sure was to come. You didn’t even know Dick well enough to confide in him fully, so you were desperately hoping you would hit it off with someone quickly.

Just as you were about to lay on your new sorely character-lacking bed, you heard your door open behind you.

“Uhh...who are you?”

The man standing in the doorway looked exhausted, and confused.

“Y/n...” you answered in a voice that almost made it sound like a question.

He pressed his fingers to the bridge of his nose, looking slightly unstable.

“...Are you ok?”

You noticed he was swaying a little, and concern started to creep up on you.

He nodded his head.

“Oh yeah, I feel totally…”

He passed out on the floor.

“What the-?!”

You jumped to your feet. Who was this man? Why was he in your room? Why did he just pass out?!

Your head buzzed with questions.

“Hey!” you yelled to the now human carpet.

Running over to his side, you checked his pulse.

“Thank god,” you thought as you felt a faint beating.

You looked down to your phone to alert Dick, when...

“-Shit…!”

The faux-corpse sat up with a start, nearly causing you to have a heart attack.

“WHAT the fuck”, you exclaimed, jumping back from him in fear.

“I’m kind of having a minute here, sorry. Can you just help me to the bed?”

“What?”

“I’m under the affects of a fear toxin right now, and if I don’t at least lay down I’m going to pass out again”, he rasped, in a tone of voice that shocked you.

He simply sounded annoyed at best, and not terrified like you’d expect someone to be while on a fear toxin.

“Ok ok”, you responded. Normally you’d resist a strange man asking to be helped to your bed, but until seconds ago you’d thought this person was dying, so you put your hesitancy to the side.

You heaved his arm over your shoulder and attempted to stand.

He was not light.

You hadn’t noticed until his weight was on you but he was extremely muscular, and the muscle mass weight was not being kind to you at the moment, especially since he was resembling a limp noodle as far as posture.

“Can you…”

“I have minimal motor control”.

“Ugh, ok fine…” you plopped him down on the bed.

“Thanks,” he sighed heavily.

There was a pause as you stood at the side of the bed, trying to come up with something to say. It was difficult to think straight after the chaos that had just ensued.

“Who are you?” the man questioned, his eyes closed.

“You already asked me that”, you responded.

“Oh.”

He paused.

“Then I might have a concussion”.

“Oh Jesus. Let me call Dick. You need to go to the hospital or something. Between that and the toxin...?”

You reached for your phone to attempt to call for a second time.

“No, please. I'll give myself another concussion if I have to see him in person”.

“...You're going to..?!”

“Relax. I heal fast. I'll be better in twenty minutes”.

You sighed heavily in relief.

“You're an asshole. Why didn't you just say that?”

“I'm not of sound mind right now and I'm trying to keep this conversation going so I can stay distracted.”

You didn't respond.

“...So. Anything interesting going on with you?”

“What do you mean?”

“Tell me about yourself. I'm dying here. For the second time.”

“For the second-”

“-Just... can you? I'm not scared but the hallucinations are a bitch”.

You took a deep breath.

“...Fine”.

You attempted to relax your tone. You were completely overwhelmed with how chaotic this man was, but you felt bad for him, and you did want to help, even if he was a stranger. You knew fear toxin was no joke.

Steeling yourself, you tried to prepare a thought.

The depression set in.

What was there to even talk about?

You spoke quietly.

“Honestly...I haven't really had anything worth talking about happen recently”.

He said nothing, seeming to wait for you to continue.

“I’m just kind if lonely, and I'm new here and I'm worried about not having anyone to confide in, and I miss the feeling of being loved so much, and this stupid room is so empty and it's making me feel empty too, and….”, you trailed off.

Embarrassment flooded you as you realized how much you had just said.

“You're ok,” he stated.

“What?”

“You're ok.”

“I'm not sure what you-”

“-Actually, yeah. You're not right now. But you'll find a way”.

He paused, looking up at you seeming slightly concerned.

“Do you...do you wanna sit?”

He gestured next to him.

Unsure, you sat down carefully, trying to avoid moving the bed too much so you wouldn't disturb his concussion at all.

“I died once”, he said.

Letting down your guard, you responded.

“How?”

This was a world where Superman was real, so why not?

“Joker kind of found a crowbar”.

“...Oh”.

This man had clearly been through it.

“But I'm still here. I'm stubborn that way”.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. You are too”.

You weren't sure where he was going with this.

“...I can tell from how long it took for me to convince you to help me up”.

You snickered.

“Sorry. I was a little overwhelmed”.

“No, it's ok. It shows that you're a fighter”.

Your smile dropped.

“Don't let anything tell you different”.

Not knowing what to say, you looked at him with tired eyes.

“Plus, you were worried about not knowing anyone, but as you can see that's not the case”, he gestured to himself.

“Yeah, ” you sniffed.

“Guess not”.

He sat up, shaking off the affects of the gas, and began walking towards the door.

You were mystified by this stranger's kindness.

As he approached the exit, you spoke.

“Hey, I never got your name”.

He smiled a little.

“Names Jason Todd. Just call my number if you need a friend. Or a crime-fighting partner”.

He walked out, and you stared after him, confused. As you moved to get out of the bed, your hand brushed a piece of paper. You gazed down, examining it. Scrawled in thin handwriting was the message:

“(900) 720-2660. Keep pushing forward. You're not going to feel alone forever”.

A tear rolled down your cheek. He was so kind, and you were so relieved by his actions.

As you were mulling over what just happened, you heard a knock at your door.

“Hey, can I come in?”

It was Dick’s voice.

“Yeah, ” you said hurriedly, wiping away your tears.

He entered, looking cautious.

“Was that just a guy in your room? It's fine if it was, but I just wanted to make sure there wasn't an intruder and-”

“It was a guy named Jason”.

“...What?!”

“Yeah, he passed out on my floor.”

Dick stormed out, fuming. You heard him yell in exasperation in the hallway.

“How’d he even get in here?!”

You laughed. It seemed like he knew Jason, and you were very curious to get the backstory.

Excitedly you realized,

“Now I have something to talk with everyone about...and a new friend”.

Maybe this wouldn't be so bad.