#I DIDNT HAVE ANY BUFFS WHAT THE FUCK

[diah-the-demon]

.... dehya im sorry how did you just hit 38k on a cryo slime with just your skill

[kittyhui]

♪ coming down - The Weeknd ♪

brother’s best friend! seungcheol x f!reader

cw: smut (minors DNI!!), pinv, unprotected sex (stay safe😁), seungcheol is buff, tbh this is really tame so dw, fluffy at the end

brothers best friend cheol x reader

°̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥☆°̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥

your brother’s friend, seungcheol, was hot. it was kind of hard to be subtle about his affect on you. the man sitting on your couch was so fucking hot and even though you’ve seen him basically every single day for the past four years, you can’t stop staring at him and his big bulky arms and wide shoulders as he talks to your brother, dokyeom.

“y/n” your brother calls out to you, breaking your thoughts, “me and cheol are heading to the gym now. we’ll grab food on the way back so text me what you want” you say your goodbyes to the boys as they head out and you go up to you room.

°̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥☆°̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥

“i feel like he’s getting hotter” you sigh through the phone to your friend “him and kyeom go to the gym like every day. his arms are practically bulging out of his shirts”

“he’s definitely doing it on purpose, y/n” she stated. you let out a scoff, denying her words “im telling you! he wants to get you in bed”

“i wish” you laugh, “but seriously if i see seungcheol in another tight shirt again i will suck him off till he sees the pearly gates-“

creak

your neck turns so fast you thought it would break and your eyes land on choi seungcheol, your brother’s best friend, and the man you were very vocally thirsting over. you hang up on your phone call, mouth still agape. “what- what are you doing here, seungcheol?”

“your brother, he uh he dropped me off just now so i can go shower before we ate… he’s picking up the food right now, that’s what i wanted to tell you….” you fought the urge to cry in embarrassment as you look at his face was bright red while he stands frozen in the doorway.

“im so sorry, cheol! i didnt mean to make you uncomfortable- fuck- lets just forget about this, please? im so sorry-“ he cuts your rambling off.

“if you felt this way, you shouldve just told me..” he hissed out. thats when you finally noticed his hands curled into tight fists, his clenched jaw, and the imprint pressed in his grey sweats. “fuck y/n, you could’ve had me for years.”

a shaky breath leaves your lips as you finally build up the strength to speak, “can i have you now?” before you can regret your words, seungcheol’s mouth is on yours, hot and wet, pushing you flatter onto your mattress, “fu- cheol… want you so bad”

“we gotta be quick” he pants, in between kisses, “kyeom will be back soon-“ he barely sounds stressed as he grabs at your hips, grinding down painfully slow. you needed more than this.

“then stop teasing me, cheolie and fuck me stupid” you purr out to the man on top of you, slipping your fingers into his sweatpants, desperately trying to take them off. “needed you for so long, can’t wait any longer.”

“need to prep you, pretty baby” you groan at the pet name, getting more desperate if that was even possible. he pulls your shorts down, cursing at the glistening arousal of your cunt, “s-shit”

“cheol! just fuck me- i can take it. please” you sounded pathetic but who could blame you. the man in front of you was playing stupid games with you and you were about to slap the shit out of him. “unless you’re too scared, cheolie?”

he grunts, detaching from you to pull down his pants and boxers, exposing his cock.. fuck it wasn’t the longest but shit- it was thick. “fine. be a brat then.” your lips form an ‘oh’ shape, beginning to deny his words, when you feel his cock sink slowly into you “fu-fuck, so tight” his jaw clenched and his thick eyebrows furrow as he continues to fill you to the brim, pushing whines and cries out of you.

your brain was turning into mush as he started his hungry thrusts. your body burned at every touch he gave you, biting your lip to suppress the noises you made “cheolie- feel so good, need more-“ you can see the corners of his lips twitch hearing you whimpering under him. his breath feels ragged on your neck when he leans down to kiss and nip at you, pulling your hips into him making his cock fuck deeper and deeper. oh. “im , im going to cum! oh oh god…” your eyes go hazy, mouth falling wide, sobs being knocked out of you as seungcheol continues to fuck you through your orgasm.

“oh, you’re clenching around me so good, princess.. makes me wanna cum in you-shit” he knows he can’t, he shouldn’t but god does he want to. he unfortunately pulls out, leaving you squeaking at the loss of fullness. he strokes himself lazily, rutting against you, getting closer to his own release. looking you in the eye, he growls, he fucking growls your name, and you feel warm cum spurt onto your stomach. “god… you’re so pretty like this, princess. did so good.” he kisses you softly before falling softly besides you.

“you should get up, cheolie.. dokyeom will probably come back soon.” you giggle, sitting up to grab the shorts that came off earlier. “im gonna go clean up” before you can leave your room, he grabs your wrist.

“i really do like you, you know?” he looks at you with big, wide eyes, “i dont want this to be a one time thing or anything. let me take you out.. dinner? lunch? coffee?” all you do is lean into him and kiss his plump lips.

“sure i’d like that. let me get cleaned first and then we’ll talk details” he smiles wide at you, nodding and you smile back.

“hey!!” you both jump, hearing yells from downstairs; dokyeom “if you two are done up there, the food’s getting cold so hurry up!!”

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a/n: dazed magazine cheol has ruined me for any man. ik he fucks good

[valentinaagarcia]

twisted wonderland characters as things i've heard in the locker room.. pt.2

(bet yall werent expecting this😈 anyways yes i am on the boys team because there was no girls team and it is NOT like k drama)

("yuu" is what i responded to what i heard)

-----

floyd: back up against the wall and bend over

jamil: WHAT

-----

(for context they were doing tigress poses from kung fu panda🔥)

kalim: ching li chong lang

riddle: okay that's just racist, you can't say that when there are people of color in the room man

yuu: why are you all looking at me im not chinese???

ace: why are you assuming it's chinese? racist.

yuu: oh so that's how it's gonna be? kill yourself.

-----

jack: okay guys we actually need a strategy to win this match

floyd: coach send me a dick pic

everyone: HE WHAT?!?

(coach meant to send that to his wife and we had an assistant coach for the entire week because he couldn't face any of us😭)

-----

jamil: you all go assault eachother with balls, i'm out.

ace: lowkey bet, deuce come over here buddy

deuce: in public??

epel: for free??

jack: why is nobody questioning that they've done this before?

leona: how do you know they've done this before huh?

jack: hm.

ruggie: .... HOW DO YOU KNOW???

-----

kalim: yuu..so you know that girl that i was talking about?

yuu: yeah whats up?

kalim: so last weekend i saw her at a gathering...

yuu: ohhkaayy.??? so did you talk to her

kalim: ask me what type of gathering it was.

yuu: ...????what type of gathering was it?

kalim: a family gathering.

-----

yuu: yo whats going on i really gotta piss why are you all hogging the toilet?

lilia: they all shared ace's pocket pussy but noone cleaned it

yuu: okay what the fuck.

lilia: yeah, they used eachothers semen as natural lube

yuu: i didnt ask you to continue.

lilia: they might have some sort of penis disease

yuu: why didn't i become a cheerleader.

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jack: okay guys cant we just be a normal football team PLEASE

jamil: i am tired of trying to play footbal only to get fingers shoved up my ass.

vil: you've gotten fingers shoved up your ass?

jamil: look i know your new to the team but.. you haven't? ace, floyd.. are you going easy on the rookies

floyd: nah i broke into his house yesterday

ace: yeah and i hit up his girlfriend

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cater: yo i heard rumors that yuu used to be a man

trey: no way? YUU

yuu: what?

trey: did you have a penis before?

yuu: no but if i did it would for sure be bigger than yours

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ace: bruh sometimes i forget that yuu has a coinslot

jack: ace shut up.

-----

yuu: bruh sometimes i forget that ace has a penis

ace: i said i'm sorry, your just so masc..

yuu: i will hit you.

jack: yeah its not her fault that she's buff! its okay to have insecurities yuu-

yuu: die

-----

floyd: i mightve just snorted fiberglass guys

jade: oh

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rook: people with homophobia are so pretty

epel: isn't it heterophobia?

vil: its fucking heterochromia

-----

deuce: yuu.. this might be shocking but your the only girl that i can talk to without stuttering with

yuu: not shocking at all.

-----

jamil: what the? WHY THE HELL IS THE WATER FROZEN?! FLOYD

floyd: wasnt me!

jamil: ACE??

ace: dont look at me

jack: jamil calm down i froze them so the water after training could be colder but it didnt melt fast, sorry

jamil: oh no worries man

floyd & ace: THE FAVORITISM???

-----

lilia: look at malleus.. poor guy, cant believe hes goalie

leona: YO malleus!

malleus: hm? *gets fucking knocked out by the ball*

sebek: OH MY GOD.

lilia: goodnight malleus

[thatdeadaquarius]

Hello there, friend I'm here for fluff

OK, this has been on my mind for a while

But like

The reader is just becoming the biggest parent to the Benny's adventure team kids

And the wolfs

We are like a parent of like 27

Knitting and making food brushing razors hair(let's be for real, you would hear a crunch when you brush it)

I'm not gonna lie

Do these kids know what spices are?

Cuz when I think about it

Razor hasn't had shit so he's has the least tolerance for spice

He would probably cry if you feed him a pepper

Bennett has tried spicy food but does go well with it

And not completely sure if fischl has had a spicy food before

But what flavor does mondstadt add to their food??

These kids need the damn flavors

AHDHAKALL FERAL ANIMAL AQUARIUS- ANOTHER PLATONIC ASK AAHHHHGGGGDJJSFHSAK!!!!!

AND ITS YOU!! ITS- ITS- ONE OF THE WRITING RULERS OF SAGAU (FOR ME AT LEAST) <3 !!!!!!!!

You cooking in genshin all anime studio ghibli style looking like food from god (literally): ⬆️

Sun: Reader (you/they/them)

Orbit: Headcanons-ish

Stars: Benny’s Adventure Team! (Bennett, Fischl, Razor), Diluc, mentions of other Mond characters

Comets & Meteors: Content Warnings: mild cussing, & Trigger Warnings: none known.

Please comment if I missed any. /gen

☆

^^ The posts being referenced in ask, (OG Razor ask) (Benny + Razor) and a more direct sequel, a part 2? a part 4 atp?? of this post (Imposter/Not Dark AU + Razor + Diluc) ^^

OMFG

ALRIGHT LISTEN UP BITCHES

SINCE UR IN TEYVAT

YOU GONNA COOK LIKE TEYVAT

AS IN-

SHIT BE SUPER EASY TO COOK, AND MASS MAKE DEPENDING ON COMPLEXITY OF DISH

(So, like Zhongli's special Bamboo Shoot Soup is like getting made... once a year if you read the little desc. for that dish 💀)

AND THEYRE ALL LIKE-

ANIME GORGEOUS FOODS ✨️❤️‍🔥

OKAY SO

PROMO TIME-

U GUYS HAVE TO WATCH THE ANIME "CAMPFIRE COOKING IN ANOTHER WORLD"

Bc that's mostly where this inspo gonna come from to both be realistic cooking + best parts of video game cooking

A guy gets isekai’d and instead of hero powers he just gets the skill of "online grocery shopping" LMAO

and ofc he gets insta gifted whatever he orders and starts making dishes and adding spices and regular stuff you know. like soy sauce.

but the best part is the food in that world is like British medieval soup shit

like barely salted, no spices definitely, no sauces, its barren

so he ends up attracting all kinds of interest that want to eat his cooking ofc

And it gives buffs too!

dw i didnt spoil anything u don't learn in the first episode, but that's just to say that's exactly whats happening here

u DO have to manually collect more ingredients but its so worth it, also u can just buy in bulk or put a commission thru the adventurer guild

tbhhh now that i say that, that could be how u end up drawing in Benny’s Adventure Team even more, bc they just take all ur quests for collecting ingredients around Mond!!

(u have to actively sneak behind their back and whisper to Katheryne that you want to put in other food quests in other guilds tho, silly kids will absolutely go running around Liyue and crazy shit just to have an adventure and do smth for you + eat ur banger food lol)

omfg the first time u barbecue smth???

the wolves, Razor, and Andrius??? Go feral.

Fischl and Benny who were already on their way to u guys to hang out again start booking it thru the woods, dodging hilichurl camps (thatve since settled down and been v peaceful to the wolves + anyone in the woods of Wolvendom after u started living there)

they knowww ur cookin smth fucking amazing

(and u even have some hilichurls and mitachurl that wander close to Andrius’ edge of the woods to shyly beg for scraps,, u give them a portion)

Razor was actually lookin at u like u hung the stars just for him when u gave him a homemade barbecue sauce to put on his food

(u acc may have done that to Teyvatians according to Andrius + the stories u overheard from Springvale…)

ok but the amount of begging u get for desserts like-

No, Razor u cannot have chocolate cake/cupcakes after every meal, u need to take care of ur teeth

(u use ur collection of mora-monster-donations for comms for more ingredients and living supplies like fabric + furniture, u cant afford dental on top of that for ur boy)

Fischl dutifully declares you the “best chef in the kingdom” and writes down all ur recipes (u have them auto-stored in ur settings obv but it cant hurt to have a physical copy, and they look so happy doing it, u don't have the heart to tell them its not necessary-)

Benny insists on both giving u extra ingredients when he takes ur commissions, and giving u handmade trinkets or weapons for the meals!!

No!! He will not take “im good” for an answer!! ur sharing ur home-cave with him, taking care of his best friend Razor, and now feeding him food better than Liuli Pavilion!!! There’s no way he can just take all that and give nothing back!!!!

and theyre not the only ones getting some food tbh

when the knights begin patroling near Wolvendom and slowly all of Mondstadt to search for their “All God”, u break up the beginnings of a fight between 2 confused knights and the now peaceful hilichurl camp at the edge of Wolvendom

U offer some snacks u were going to give Benny’s Adventure Team when they got back (u made little triangle sandwiches, rice balls, etc. finger foods, and u made plenty extra bc u kno their teenage appetites lol)

the knights and hilichurls nearly cried with appreciation, which made for a hilarious sight when the teens actually showed up lmao

ur wearing ur cloak, bc u dont wanna take on that whole “creator of worlds” title just yet, and the kids helped verify u werent anyone suspicious (Benny + Fischl keep ur godly secret, theyre the best like that 🥰)

the knights just swing by for snacks occasionally (they also either pay u in trade or with mora, theyre not bullies)

another person who gets flavored food privileges is the lazy librarian witch herself

u also sometimes pick Razor up from Lisa’s tutoring and bring “the best tea and tea snacks in the world” along with to share with Lisa and him

(she is also fully aware after awhile of meeting u of what u are, and fully believes this is why the food must be enchanted to be so good, but u dont want to be treated super reverently she can tell, so she keeps ur secret too and is just extra flirty when u come by lol)

(Razor refuses to let his pare- Lupical move out of ur cozy cave to the library, so he sometimes hauls u away when Lisa flirts too much LMAO)

…and the moment you've been waiting for.

Yes, Diluc got to try ur food that night he was searching Wolvendom for signs of the god of Teyvat

tbh Diluc was half-convinced that shit was a fever dream.

a bunch of sleepy wolves, a coffee table in the stone colosseum, a giant spirit wolf licking a big plate clean, the wolf-kid glaring at him, and you.

you with gold eyes, staring right thru his soul, like you already know everything there is to know about him, (like the way Kaeya looked at him that night),

like he doesnt even have to introduce himself

and he doesnt, u just lightly smack Razor’s hands until he gets rid of his claymore w/a pout, since Diluc had long since dropped his,

and grab a plate, piling on what leftovers u could, and turn back around from the coffee table to smile at him, patting the cushion-seat beside u for him to join

The giant glowing wolf licks his lips and watches him, the wolf-kid’s creepily watches him, and you, with eyes gold in teh light of a simmering bonfire just past the table, watch him

he just sits down and begins to eat.

its the best food he’s ever had, its his dad’s favorite dish, but not realistically, but the way memory embellishes a dish so much it can never be tasted again, except its right here. in front of him. u pour some wolfhook juice for him, and offer him a napkin to wipe his mouth and eyes

Diluc visits often after that, obviously.

u give him snacks too, and when he lets the staff try some, Adeline will not stop harassing him abt gettin ur recipes/ingredeints so u get him to pay Fischl to get a copy of their recipe book :)

including blank pages for future entries, and Fischl is literally glowing with happiness, would not stop monologuing abt ur food for weeks (send help Oz wants some peace and quiet sometimes)

Oh Diluc absolutely told the Favonius knights he found you. But he’s not saying where LMAO

Jean is actually begging him, Diluc ik u hate the knights but this is an international investigation-

this is the closest Diluc has ever gotten to getting under Venti’s skin.

when he told him this at Angel’s while bartending, he just casually ofc said this, just his smug little smirk, and the anemo god cracked a glass and everything- esp when he said he tried ur cooking??

he's gotta start looking over his shoulder in the city bc not only is Venti stalking him, the entirety of Mondstadt’s citizens are glaring at him in envy everywhere he goes LMAOO

(Venti now has a bar glass or too on his tab to pay off as well)

mans is literally paying u in weapon/artifact materials/mora to make him lunch one day and Venti nearly lunges over the counter

(Diluc purposefully ate it in front of him 💀)

ur food is the ultimate, “u could make a religion out of this!” /ref

like Diluc fully gives u offerings of ingredients he can pay for shipping from other countries + along with regular materials after grinding in domains

does the rest of Mondstadt + the world find out where u are?

only if Diluc lets them tbh. LMFAO

☆

bk trashfire my beloved <3 love ur ideas and stuff, goes without even saying im so sorry i took actually forever to respond :’(

hope u have a great weekend and i did this little side story justice for you

Safe Travels BK Trashfire,

💀♒

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♡my beloveds♡

@karmawonders / @0rah-s / @randomnatics / @glxssynarvi / @nexylaza / @genshin-impacts-me / @wholesomey-artist / @thedevioussmirk / @the-dumber-scaramouche / @chocogi / @fallen-starr / @areaderofbooks / @devilangel657 / @esthelily / @justinsomniachild / @nanithefuck / @questionotmystopit / @chinuneko / @silvers-tongue

@kiyomi-uchiha777

[shakirawastaken]

dsmp if... you were a romance trope

i got inspiration (sapnap, dream, george, karl, quackiy, wilbur) 

sapnap (hockey x figure skater): - im in the middle of heartbreaker rn and SHUT UP - i LOVE THIS TROPE - IM NOT EVEN A FIGURE SKATER I DO TAEKWONDO BUT I STILL FROTH OVER THIS SHIT - and then in addition to that one tommyinnit is a figure skater and everyone else is on a hockey team “ice these hurts” or smt h like that - i love this trope. - anyway i think that this trope comes hand in hand with enemies to lovers - his hockey team and ur figure skating group are at the same winter sports competiton - and you have to share a rink - booooo - so everyday you end practice with the sight of a bunch of hockey buffs roughhousing in the stands, waiting for you to finish - and everyday a certain brunette one sneers and smirks at you as you walk off the ice - “had a nice practice ice queen/king?” he asks you teasingly - “shut up, yeti” you mutter back gratingly as you bump your shoulder into his build as you pass him - and he comes up with a new one everyday - and you quip right back at him, unphased - one day, he comes into practice early just to spite you - what he wasn’t expecting is to see how good you actually were on the ice - he sat there like “ :O” and just watche dyou glide across the ice with what seemed like barely any effort - and he watched how passionate you were in your craft and the dance - and bro was whipped right then and there - so that day as you were leaving he said “you were amazing out there” and it took u jumpscared - you were like “no insult today?” - and he was like “dang, didnt know u liked them that much ;) but not today, not for something as beautiful as that” - and i think you can guess where it went from there... :)

 dream (ceo and employee romance):  - AKAIAKAKAHAKH TELL ME YOU SEE THE VISION - i mean hes a ceo alr so its like one step in the door you know - anyway hes a ceo - bro wears those fancy ass suits everyday and has like a wine cellar mini fridge shit thing in his office  - any way you pull up to his headquarters one day for like an interview and you were so fucking nervous  - you ran into him in the elevator (and no clue who he was) - and you basically vented to him for the 30 second elevator ride before scurrying off to your interview - bro didnt even get dreams name or anything - he kinda just smiled and wished you well as you ran away  - he thought you were so cute  - and you thought dude was hot as fuck  - anyway you got the JOB!! LETS GOO - the next day, your supervisor is like taking u around showing u the works - ....and you meet the ceo - its dream - and youre like :0 and he’s like  *smirk wink* ;) “hey” - and youre like “well fuck hes the ceo i cant be in love with him” - and you avoid him - but he makes it his life’s mission to get on ur radar - in the break room, in ur cubicle, in the cafeteria, in the parking lot man is ON YOU LIKE A MOTH TO A LIGHT - eventually he convinces you to go to fancy dinner - and WOW hes paying?? so that shit was FIREEEE - fancy wagyu steak and 102379182 year old wine i mean cmon - it was good ok - he asks you out after dinner and assures u ur job wont be at risk and everything - ba da bing ba da boom  - now youre dating happily and he spoils the FUCK outta you  - lmk if you want this one as a big fic with dialogue

george (neighbors): - tell me why whenever i have my delulu daydreams with george he’s always a neighbor - very much boy next door vibes - omg HES YOUR COLLEGE ROOMMATE NEXT DOOR - stoppppp - on move in day he pulls up with his family and u with urs and youre like - “hi ! nice to meet you im so exicted to move in!” and bros like “same!” - sometimes hes loud bc hes talking to his friends but you dont mind - hes a cs major and ur  whatever u want major - one day you decided to start singing  rlly loud while cleaning - ur singing taylor swift - and then george could hear you from the room next door to yours - so he writes up a little post it note that was like “loved the concert! when’s the next one?” and stuck in on your door - you found it and started mad blushign - you had a crush on him since day one awwww - anyways you two started communicating via post it notes and songs played loudly through the walls <3 - till one day you hear boyfriend by big time rush - and then you play girlfriend by avril lavigne back - and then he slips you a post it note under the door and you open the door before you could read it  - and its an unspoken like thing that you start dating - its so romantic how you can saw you guys starting dating because of taylor swift !!

quackity (academic rivals): - DO NOT GET ME STARTED ON THIS TROPE IT BRINGS ME LIFE ALRIGHT - alright - two law school students FIGHTING IT OUT ACADEMICALLY - you guys met in ur freshman year english class or some shit - clashed together in a discussion group - and its been game on since then - your texts with each other are flaunting texts - “hey alex, guess who got a 97 on the last midterm?” - “guess who got a 99 ;)” - over time, the texts started getting more and more hostile - people started to thing you two actually hated one another’s guts  - but in reality it was more for the thrill - but this continued throughout your law school careers - and you both become successful lawyers in the end!! - and when the headmaster calls you both into his office and says - “youre both valedictorian! congrats! you have to give a speech together” - well its like all the hatred faded away - you grinned and cheezed at each other before giving each other the biggest hug ever - so you both wrote a speech together - and soon the day of graduation came - and q goes at the end “i wouldn’t be here without the person who motivated me through it all, so thank you (y/n)” and youre like “hey man *sob* wtf *sob” - and you kiss him on the cheek and cheer to all the graduates  - after the ceremony he catches up to you in the parking lot, grabbing your wrist before you could go off with ur family - and blurts out word soup - and ur like what - and hes like “i really like you, and law school wouldn’t have been the same without you. can we be more than friends?” - and youre like “duhhh” and kiss him right there karl (best friends to lovers): - YOU ARE IN LOVE BY TAYLOR SWIFT  - that is the song for this SCENARIO - you two met when you were little kids in like first grade - your friends werent there on that day so you hung out with each other - hooked to the other since then and there - it was always “karl and you” and “you and karl” - you came as a packaged deal - through ups and downs you were there together - you graduated high school together and were going to the same college together now - while karl barely got into any romantic relationships, you seemed to be going through a few of them  - you were desperate for a love connection and honestly i aint blaming u - one day after a horrible date he came over to your dorm and u had an impromptu sleepover - you were in karls old shirt and some pajama pants and he was in his pajamas - and you two were just watching a movie together - before he turns to you abruptly, and you turn to look at him - and he’s like “you’re my best friend”  - and you saw a switch flip in him - since then, the dynamic between you two changed (for the better) - you became more flirty more touchy  - you started to act like you were a couple more and more - one day you saw him open his wallet to pull out his card  - and u saw that he has a picture of the two of you in his wallet - and then you knew that he was it for you - you ask him out that night - and hes so happy hes picking you up and spinning you around - <3 wilbur (musician x fan trope): - okay this is inspired by those tik toks that are like “did you see the way he looked at me” and its harry styles staring and eyeing down a fan in the audience like YES - and he’s a musician so it fits! - imagine lovejoy is like a HUGE HUGE Band so maybe this is in the future - anyways you and ur friend go to a lovejoy concert - for the sake of the story, youre not that big a fan of lovejoy just familiar with hits like sex sells and one day - the whole time ur friend is like “theyre so good hes so good its all so good” - you two end up a few rows from barricade  - and you and ur friend start screaming it up as you should - youre not oblivious to the way the lead singer keeps looking over in your direction, winking and smiling - imagine a sweaty, singing wilbur glancing over at you during sex sells and giving you a smile as he rasps out “you know sex sells i know that” - brb ascending to heaven - anyway a time comes when he stops to speak to the audience - he wastes no time - he struts over to your side of the stage and points at you  - “what’s your name?” - and you scream it at him - “what a lovely name!” - the crowd cheers - “ahre you single?” he asks with a grin on his face - the grin grows when u nod at him - “give me ur number!?” he asks and you nod at him as ur friend is dying next to you - he gestures u and ur friend to the front of the stage by the barricade  - and he passes you a marker and make syou WRITE YOUR NUMBER ON HIS GUITAR OR HIS SHIRT OR SOMETHING - oh yeahh go you go you thank yoU! let me know if you want any of these to become a bigger story/imagine and LET ME KNOW IF YOU WANT A PART 2 WITH OTHER PEOPLE :D reblogs appreciated

[tinycoffeeroom]

farm love | italian bach

face claim: none ♡

request: here !

requested: Could I request an Italian Bach imagine inspired by Arthur’s vlog to Jezza Clarksons farm?? Maybe on that trip or maybe they just go on a cute little remote trip in the country farm? In their own private cabin (maybe a hot tub on the deck?👀) I feel like Bach is always a great bf but when he’s with friends he’s in his comedy/entertaining mindset so it’s subtle sweet gestures whereas when it’s just them he’s super clingy and boldly romantic

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📍 Cotswolds

👤 georgeclarkeey, arthurtv liked by y/nstagram, arthurtv and 298,017 others

italianbach me and my 2 boyfriends were invited down to the lovely Diddly Squat Farm to experience farm life and preview #/ClarksonsFarm season 3! Huge thank you to primevideouk for the invite!

y/nstagram and where are my pic creds? ↳ italianbach sorry who are you? ↳ y/nstagram oh, you're sleeping in one of the other huts tonight ↳ italianbach babe no george's snoring will interrupt my beauty sleep :(((( ↳ y/nstagram too bad didnt ask xx ↳ italianbach now look what you've done georgeclarkeey arthurtv ↳ georgeclarkeey wtf did we do?????? ↳ italianbach idk be sexy or something?

fan bach not even posting his gf but has time to post these two muppets

fan we want y/n!!!!!! ♥️ y/nstagram

fan george please give me a chance

fan arthur wrapping his arms around his two little omegas, we love a true alpha ↳ arthurtv what the fuck ↳ georgeclarkeey can't tell if i'm offended by being called an omega... ↳ italianbach i am?? we all know i'm a beta!!

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You were surprised to have been invited along to the Clarkson's Farm premiere alongside Arthur, George and Isaac. You didn't really have a following, mostly people coming from Isaac's constant posts about you to see who his girlfriend was.

The coach ride there had certainly been... something. Arthur annoyed the others by vlogging the entire thing, constantly asking Isaac and George to repeat their jokes so he could catch it on camera and having to redo shot after shot when the footage came out shaky or his finger had been covering the mic at the bottom of his phone.

You'd chosen to sit behind the group of lads, plugging your headphones in to play a small town farmer romance audiobook. If you're going to be subjected to dirt and the trio for the weekend, you were going to take advantage and daydream about a buff farmer sweeping you off your feet.

Isaac made sure to keep an eye on you, well aware that you were too engrossed in your audiobook to notice him. Knowing you were slightly camera shy as well, often choosing to be behind the lens and film his tiktoks, he chose to text you instead of drawing attention to you, conscious of the fact that Arthur could whip out his phone for another vlog clip at any moment.

Midway through the first meeting of the MC and the strong, beefy farmer, your phone lit up. At the top of the screen, you saw a few Instagram notifications and two texts from your boyfriend.

Isaac <3 You ok babe? x We should be stopping at Oxford services in about 20 minutes x

Looking up at your boyfriend, his attention was half on you and half on George who was, once again, jokingly shouting at Arthur who had asked him to repeat himself for the 20th time since you'd stepped onto the coach. Smiling briefly at the trio, you looked back down at your phone to reply.

My Love <3 I'm good angel xx May nip in and grab a sandwich or something, I'm kinda hungry :( x

Two seconds after the read receipt appeared beneath your message, a hand thrust a packet of Malteasers between the seat gaps. Grabbing the packet from your boyfriend, you sent him a grateful smile, quickly tucking into the chocolate.

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After a day of trekking back and forth across farm land, cudding cute little piglets and being stuffed full of the most gorgeous food and wine Clarkson's Farm had to offer, you and Isaac say goodbye to George and Arthur, waving them off as you walk up the little path to your cabin.

Despite it being later on in the day, the sun was still shining thanks to the British summertime. You immediately open your suitcase, grabbing a bikini and swapping your muddy tracksuit bottoms and band top you'd stolen from Isaac at some point. Isaac catches onto your thinking, also grabbing some trunks from his suitcase and changing into them.

You grab the bottle of champagne gifted by Prime Video and open the back patio doors which lead to small set of patio chair and a large hot tub.

Whilst Isaac double checks that the front door is locked, you slide into the water, sighing as the warmth soothes your aching muscles. It had been a while since you had spent this long on your feet and the last time you checked your watch, you'd done 35,000 steps.

Closing your eyes, you allow yourself a moment of silence, taking in the faraway bleats of the sheep in the meadow opposite your cabin. A warm breeze flows through the air, making a few stray hairs on your face sway gently.

You hear the doors behind you open and close and an affronted noise comes from your boyfriend. Cracking one eye open, you look back to see him frowning at you in the hot tub.

"What's up, babe?" You already know, but it's sweet to see how clingy Isaac gets when it's just the two of you.

"Budge up." He queues up a playlist on his phone, connecting it to the outside speaker before stepping into the hot tub, staring at you with a playful pout.

You comply, moving to the side so he can sit in your spot. As he settles down, one arm snakes around your waist, lifting you up and dragging you onto his lap under the water. His other arm joins the first, a strong interlink ensuring you won't go anywhere. Not that you'd want to.

"Better?" Grinning up at him, you slide your hand to rest at the base of his neck, fingers tangling in the chocolate brown curls there.

Isaac hums in lieu of a verbal response, face coming to rest in the curve of your neck. Feather light kisses trace along your skin, starting at the juncture between your neck and shoulder, trailing up to below your ear.

You giggle at the sensation, twirling the strands of hair entangled in your fingers round and round as he playfully nips your ear lobe once before pulling away. You untangle your fingers from his hair, moving your hand to the front to swipe his fringe away slightly to get a good look at him.

His eyes seem to twinkle in the now fading sunlight as he takes a moment to trace over your face. "You're so beautiful."

You can feel the blush rising hot up your neck, splaying out dusty pink on your cheeks. Even after being with him for so long, he still manages to fluster you every time he calls you beautiful. Normally, it's a throwaway comment, something he mentions whilst in the middle of something else. But here, just the two of you in the quiet British countryside, your heart seems to skip a beat, thumping a clumsy rhythm in your chest.

Wrinkling your nose to hide the way the statement made you feel, you run a finger gently across his cheekbone, dragging it softly down his cheek to the corner of his jaw. "And you're handsome."

His eyes are glued to your cheeks, smile widening as the blush only deepens, now crimson pink and burning hot. "I mean it. I know I say it a lot, but right here, in this moment, you're ethereal. I'm just so lucky you finally agreed to date me. Knowing that I get to wake up everyday and see you when you first wake up, that I get to walk into any room you're in and watch your face light up when you see me, and that I get to fall asleep holding you every night... Honestly, I don't think I could ask for a better life."

Your eyes are lined with unshed tears, mouth trembling as words of adoration spill from your boyfriends lips. He's a known secret romantic, you had the anniversary cards filled with paragraph after paragraph of him waxing poetic about you; but to hear it come directly from him, his voice warm and syrup soaked, your heart beat another treacherous beat, yearning to burst out and reach for the man below you.

"Isaac... I love you. So much." Your hand cups his cheek, thumb rubbing lightly over the skin below. "I couldn't ask for a better life either. This is the best relationship I have ever been in, and I have you to thank for that. Thank you for showing me a love I only thought was possible in movies."

Leaning down, you press a soft kiss to his lips, revelling in the delighted hum it pulls from your boyfriend. His arms wrap tighter around you, twisting you in a way so the two of you are chest to chest. He pulls you in deeper, mouth warm and insistent against your own.

When it feels like he's pulled every last bit of breath from your lungs, he pulls away slightly, murmuring a soft "I love you too" as he presses one final kiss to the corner of your mouth.

You move your head to rest in the crook of his neck, enjoying the warmth of the water and your boyfriend's body as the sun sets slowly behind you.

You're almost lulled to sleep, cocooned in the arms of your lover. Isaac's hands move in a repeated rhythm along your back, dragging up and down in slow circles as he hums along to the song playing softly from the speaker in the corner.

Before you can drift off, he mutters just loud enough to be heard over the bubbling of the hot tub. "Wanna go in the pool tomorrow?"

Nuzzling down further into the crook of his neck, you nod your head lightly, already smiling at whatever stupid Tiktok's he'll make you film. "Fuck yeah."

His chest vibrates with laughter in response and you close your eyes, pressing one last kiss to the skin beneath your lips as the two of you welcome the sky full of stars.

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a/n: first italianbach fic ! welcome to my gaggle of men mr isaac xo first of the ac3may hc's and my lil fingies are flying working through the rest !

[kitty-meowskers]

idk but a part of me gets annoyed whenever people compare dr ratio and alhaitham.

like yeah ok... hot buff autistic nerdy men

but their whole ideologies are completelyyy different

would alhaitham ask you to give him a 'stimulating quiz' in his free time and then proceed to design a weapon for the express even though he didnt need to? no.

would dr ratio complain about becoming the (acting) grand sage and lead sumeru? no??

alhaitham is a 'live and let live' kind of guy. he justs wants to chill and have an easy life. like be for real, he's so worried about the akademiya finding out about his true talents and power because he hates the idea of working more. the only reason he's the scribe is because it's easy and it pays well. he's not particularly interested in helping others out unless its beneficial to him or the other really needs it. as kaveh said(i think he did??? idk i dont play genshin anymore), alhaitham is a nihilist

dr ratio on the other hand? he craves being able to fix things. all he wants to do fix things. although yeah he's not gonna do everything for you, he literally said to your face that if somethings bothering you deal with it yourself BUT he did literally go out of his way to scheme that entire thing in his quest to bring the people on the space station to there senses and get them thinking for themselves instead of obsessing over those geniuses. and that whole speech he gave to screwlum after? bro was INVESTED AND INTENSELY PASSIONATE. hes extremely passionate about getting people do use and develop their talents to the best of their ability. hes a fucking doctor who somehow has 52 courses and any of the people who actually make it through all get far in their lives. alhaitham would never put in that effort even with all his talent and ngl dr ratio would hate him for that (maybe not hate but dislike).

Another difference? alhaitham isnt a bitch about what his talents although its easy to assume he is while ratio low key kind of is and since the game itself describes him as 'narcisistic' so i think its pretty safe to assume he acts a bitch and he kind of is one too (cant blame him if i did all he did i would be the same)

[sirenmoth]

heyy!! i loved your story "Breeding Team" and was wondering if you could do a part 3. where the reader gives birth to lots of babies? thank you<3

New Additions

Poly Pack - Complete

Synopsis: The pack welcomes three new members

Didnt see this being a 3 parter by, hey. The kids dont have names cuz i suck at naming things

CW: Non descriptive childbirth, soft buff military men crying, fluff, domestic fluff, pregnancy, hurt/comfort?, semi insecure reader, crying, sexual themes, implied sex, i legit forgot i added graves to this, mainly Kyle, Alejandro and Roldolfo centric cuz i love them, and they need more fics (not me with several WIPs about those three), my back hurts after this.

Previous

Your morning usually consisted of having at least one or two, maybe more depending on how busy everyone is, of your mates cuddled up against, bare skin to skin contact which they insisted upon after your little meltdown. The warmth of the bodies laying next to you seeped into your bones, settling deep within you as it calmed your nerves. After your most recent doctors appointent, you found out you were having triplets, three little ones due at any moment, at anytime. A DNA test was scheduled to see who the fathers are, mostly to calm down the bickering and fighting that eruoted once it was found out that their omega was expecting, all wanted to the be the father of the first litter as a pack. All wanted the gender of your children to be a surprise.

You were convinced they had bets going on on who the father, now fathers, are. Each showed their love for you and the unborn pups in their own way, talking to your stomach, bringing what cravings you had. It was definitely not the trying to get ahead on imprinting on them early.

They took turns staying in the nest with you, keeping you in the middle incase something happened. Today it was Alejandro and Rodolfo's turn to be in the nest with you, they often their turns in pairs:

Ghost and Soap.

Price and Gaz.

Alejandro and Rodolfo.

König and Graves.

It was sufficating having eight men constatly at your side at all hours of the day, if one was working one would be tasked to stay with you. If all were busy you'd be told to stay put in one of their offices, not allowed to leave without one of your alphas company. Their protectiveness only grew as the due date came closer.

Hoping for some quiet and alone time before the two men woke up, you slowly climbed out of the bed to the best of your ability, picking up a shirt that belongs to one of the guys you found on the ground, non of your clothes have fitted you in months but one of the perks of having more than one partner is someones clothes are bound to fit you.

Your legs sore and trembled with each step you took, despite being pregnant with triplets that didn't curb your independence, or your hormones or theirs, you'd sometimes spend your days and nights carefully being laid or bend over something, slowly fucking into you, making love to you, having you cockwarm them, worshipping you like a goddess, filling you with their cum again and again. If needed, fucking each other while you laid and watched if you were too tired or the thought you couldn't take it, watching how the men fight for domainince, sometimes playfully before getting stuffed and fucked brainless by their equal counterpart.

Waddling your way to the conjoined bathroom to relieve yourself and wash up, wanting nothing more than a nice, warm relaxing bath. After using the toilet and washing your hands, you sit on the side of the costom built bathtub, leaning over to the taps to the best of your ability to try and place the plug in the drain but the massive swell of your stomach made the task difficult.

Sitting on the side didn't work so you tried sitting inside the tub, you could barely get the plug in before the strain in your arms became too much, you were getting frustrated that your alone time was dwindling bit by bit. Tears started to line your waterline, sitting in an empty bathtun built to accommodate at least four people. You just wanted some peace and quite.

To get away from the over-pugnet alpha smell.

To breathe.

A soft knock on the door rips you from your thoughts, alreting you that your alone time was up. "I'll be out in a minute" you call out, using handles at the side of the tub to assit in getting out, setting your feet on the soft bathmat placed beside it. The feeling of worry carries through the shared bond. "I'm fine, just needed to clean up a bit" hoping your excuse is enough to settle the man outside the door.

"¿Cariño?¿Puedes abrir la puerta?" The voice you recognised as Rodolfo, softly asked, allowing you enough privacy but keeping you close, as close as a bathroom door would allow. "What's happening, You can talk about it, mi amor" Rudy asks, knocking on the door again. He twists the door handle, to find out himself you locked it. His knocking became more adamant, determined on entering and ensuring you're alright.

"God, I'm fine! Can't I have five fucking minutes of peace for once! Just fuck off and leave me alone!" You scream, the frustration finally comes upfront.

Rodolfo's footsteps were heard turning and leaving the bedroom, the bedroom door faintly shutting, leaving you alone, like you asked, and unclear if Alejandro is still asleep or up and doing whatever tasks and chores he needs to do. Leaning against the cold tiled wall, you ease yourself down onto the floor, finally letting the tears flow. How the boys stayed calm and stuck with you all through all this beyond you. They were important and busy men, they could have anyone to warm their beds and carry their pups. Why choose you?

Double set of footsteps could be heard re-entering the bedroom, stopping outside the bedroom door again. Faint whispering between whoever was out there, followed by yet another knock, "Love, can you open the door?" Gaz. Sweet, loving, caring Kyle. He was the most calm and understanding of the eight of them, always able to talk you and ease you out of your more emotional moments. Bith stood on the other side of the door, trying to coax you to open it or get you out the bathroom.

After a few moment of nothing, and the barrier remaining in place,the Mexican and British men they try a different approach.

Rudy sighs, clearing his throat, "You can talk from in there, sí, sólo dinos qué pasa" his soft voice ringing in your ears, conern threaded deep into his tone.

You could see the image of his worry lines and cute, pippy-like expression in your mind, guilt or bile rose in your throat, the acidic smell hit your nose causing you to gag, the pups in your stomach moving around, kicking and pushing your skin from the inside didn't help.

Against your better wishes, using the wall and sink to get back up and steady yourself, you slowly make your way to the door and unlock it, using the handle as a aid when the pups kick again. The puffiness in your eyes evidence enough of the crying. "I'm sorry" you whimper meekly, keeping your head down.

Kyle opens his arms and pulls you into a hug, stroking your hair as you sob into his shirt, Rodolfo puts a hand on your back, rubbing up and down in an attempt to sooth you. Both felt guilty over not knowing what happened and if they caused it, if they missed something.

Did they fail as partners?

The man to your left gives a quite kiss to your head "Estás bien, estás bien, estamos aquí, está bien" he whispered to you in his native tounge, "what's wrong? Did somethinh happen?" he softly pressed, carefully tip-toeing around to ensure there isn't another breakdown.

Sniffiling, you shake your head no. burrowing further into the warm body in front of you. "I want wanted a bath and alone alone time. Didn't mean to shout." you whisper, voice hoarse from crying.

"Oh baby, it's ok" the British alpha reassures, "Why don't we run a bath while you sit here and a relax, hm?" he asks, gentle as ever.

The bedroom door opens unexpectedly, the smell of freash food fills your senses, a gruff but sweet voice calls out to the three of you, "Everything ok?" Alejandro, stands in the doorway with a plate of alegrías de amaranto and a cup of licuados, he was always trying to get you eat something healthy, even if it contained sugar.

Both men standing beside you nodded in unison, still keeping their arms tight around you, Rudy speaks something to Ale you don't quite hear but judging by his reaction it was about the events prior to his arrival. Alejandro sets the plate and cup down on the bedside table, telling Kyle and Rodolfo to start the bath for you, helping you out their arms and to sit on the bed, they both left to do as told.

"Shh, mi amor" he whispers, arranging your body so your legs are over his, head agaisnt his chest and back propped up by a few pillows, "te traje comide, vamos, come."

Alejandro picks up the plate from the table, holding it up to you so you can eat, small bites followed by sips of the drink he brought, he still kept is around around you, holding you against his chest as you ate. The muffled sound of runnng water filed in from the bathroom mixed with barely audible chatter.

After your food and drink was finished and the plate and cup were back on the table, Alejandro carefully picks you up bridal style, making sure to keep you as close as possible, walking towards the bathroom to join the two men already in there. He plces you down on the bathmat, the bath now filled with hot water and deep galatic blue colour from the bath-bomb they pickout, barely visible from under the bubbles floating on top the water.

Rudy removes your -Ghosts- shirt, jokingly complementing you on it, asking where you got it and that it looks good on you. He folds it and puts it on the toilet seat, helping you into the water and making sure you're comfortable, saying he and the other two will be in the other room if you need anything.

The three left you to have your alone time, you laye your head back on to the edge of the tub, letting the water reach your shoulders. Closing your eyes and letting out a sign, feeling the tranquillity relax your muscles, relax your mind, letting it wash away all your problems and stress.

Sudden pain spreads through your lower region, another one then another, the babies kicks become for frequent, shouting out to the guys as you white-knuckle the tub, trying to even your breathing, the door nearly falls off its hinges as it burts open, eyes flying around the room hoping to stop any danger before landing on you, silently asking what's wrong.

"I think my water just broke."

The Nurses gathered around you, shouting out different things, bringing in all sorts of equipment and moving you around, attending to your every need to make sure you're comfortable as possible. They ask your mates to wait in the waiting room, stating having an alpha in the room can cause problems.

All protested, not wanting to miss anything, but left eventually, leaving you alone to deliver the pups.

Johnny was the most reckless, pacing around the waiting room table, König sat in a comically small chair, nervously fidgeting next to Ghost who was giving the smll low growls, irritated by the constant movements.

Price and Graves were oddly calm, sat at opposite ends of the room, being leaders and commanders of hundreds of soldier, it made sense why they were the most calm, Alejandro was too, but not as calm at them.

"I cannae take this any longer" Soap growls, stopping his pacing to look at the double doors that lead to the labour and delivery ward, eyes swimming with impatience and worry.

"It's only been a few hours, sunshine" Price huffs out, moving around his chair, arms crossed over his chest. The hospital has a 'no smoking' rule indoors, no matter how badly he wants a cigar, Price stays put, not wanting to miss the announcement when the pups are born

Four of the eight men in the room groan in response; Alejandro, Rodolfo, Kyle and Johnny. All four were more than excited to meet the little one, they could barley stay still. waiting for one of the nurses to tell them it's ok to see you.

"Who'd you think the fathers are? " Graves pipes up, smug smirk on his face, "What? I'm just asking." he is confident on the question, whether it was to start a fight or it was a genuine question is hard to say

"Obviously it's me."

"Not even close, Johnny."

"What makes you think it's you, Skull-Boy?"

Price closes his eyes and tilts his head back, trying to block out yet another argument, praying a nurse comes soon.

"Könnte ich sein."

"God help our bonnie if it's you, ye Austrian giant."

"That's mean, hermano"

The bickering continues, back and forth, until one of the nurses comes in, standing by the double swing doors, does everyone shut up, listening to what she has to say. "There were a few complications, but that's expected when you have triplets, but mama is healthy and well. You have three healthy baby girls. Congratulations." she says.

Relief floods through the men, three daughters.

"Do you know who the fathers are?" König asks the nurse.

She shakes her head, "The doctor is talking to your mate now, you'll know then. You're welcome to visit them now." She explains before leaving the men in the waiting room.

Two of your babies were sleeping beside you in hospital provided basins, you just got the back after they checked them and did all the necessary procedures. They looked so cute wrapped up in their blankets and hats. Soft, tiny whines here and there could be heard of them every once in a while.

After seeing their faces, their tiny hands clasped around your finger as they took their first breathes, you knew who each of your new childrens fathers were. The resemblance could be seen clear as day.

The door to your room swings open with such force, nearly hitting the wall, "Careful! You'll wake them." you whisper-shout to whoever opened it, looking at your eight partners and the tears in their eyes as you spot the newborns, "Their sleeping!" you say, looking down at th child in your arms.

They all flock around them, Ghost comes over to take the child you're holding from you, stating you need to sleep, Price and Johnny both look at the pup Ghost is now holding, cooing at how cute she is. "The one you're holding his Kyle's" you mutter, sleepily smiling at them, watching their attempt to hold themselves together.

Gaz looks over at the child in the masked man arms, tears lining his waterline, all stopped fighting back tears the second they caught sight of their small pups. Kyle points to himself, as to confirm it's his, you nod to confirm she is indeed his. Ghost hands the man his newborn, the smile on Gaz's face seems to get wider as he looks at his daughter. "And the other two?" he whispers.

"The second girl is Rodolfo's and the third is Alejandro's" You say, trying your hardest to stay awake, the two Mexicans have a face splitting smile, Looking at their children, with such love and adoration in their eyes. "I haven't had a test, but i know their yours, i just know,i can see you in them." The three men nod, you don't need some test to tell that the they were their pups.

"I haven't named them yet, thought you could." you announce, slowly blinking as sleep starts to claim a hold on you.

Price sits next to you on the bed. wrapping an arm around your shouldera, pulling you into his side, " You did great, love, we'll take it from here. Get some rest" he whipsers, careful not to wake the sleeping babies. He presses a kiss to you forehead and you lay your head down on his shoulder.

Finally allowing yourself to sleep. watching as the men coo over the new pups, placing bets on whos next and saying how'll be the next to have children.

translations:

¿Cariño?¿Puedes abrir la puerta? - Sweetheart? Can you open the door?

sí, sólo dinos qué pasa - yes, just tell us what's happening

Estás bien, estás bien, estamos aquí, está bien - You're ok, you're ok, we're here, you're ok

mi amor - my love

te trajecomida, vamos, come - i brought food, come on, eat

Alegrías de Amaranto- Mexican candy made from amaranth seeds and honey or sugar

Licuados - Latin American drink made with milk, fruit and ice

Hermano - Brother

Könnte ich sein - Could be me

[outsidersstuff16]

can you do a darry x reader birthday smut

It was your 19th birthday, hooray! Or so you thought when you woke up. Today was a horrible day, your car broke down, you mom and dad couldn't get the time to call you and wish you a happy birthday, your friends took you to lunch and then left you the bill. It was just a big train wreck of a day. All you wanted to do was rub and hide in your buff boyfriend arms but you couldn't do that either. He was at his roofing job. You laid in bed feeling kinda depressed and couldn't get Darry and his pretty cock out of your head. The more you thought about it, the hornier you got. Before you knew it, you were rubbing your clit and muttering and moaning out his name. You were home alone so it wasn't like anyone could hear you, or so you thought. Darry had come and was down stairs with flowers and a small pendant he had purchased you for you birthday, it took him 3 paychecks to save up for both items. When Darry had heard his name being moaned out he had a good, general idea as of what was going on. He took off his work boots and put the items down on your kitchen counter before walking upstairs to your room. He opened the door quietly and walked over to your bed. He took your hand away from clit.

"Havin fun without me, baby? I don't think so." He said sternly before getting on your bed and setting you in his lap. He reached his calloused hand and started rubbing on your clit using his middle finger. "Lets have birthday sex, baby... I'll make it so good" he said persuadingly. Whithout a second thoughtz you agreed by nodding softly. He laid down on your bed and gave you a look.

"What..?" You asked confused about the look he was giving you.

"Ride my face, baby." He said softly yet demandingly. You did as he said, you hovered about 6 inches above his face, which didn't appeal to him at all.

"Baby, i said ride my face not the air." He said smartly, you didn't wanna crush his face. You went down softly, you stopped when you were about 4 inches above his face. He wasn't telling you again, he put his large hands on the top of your upper thighs, pulling you down fully on his face. The second his tongue met your tight hole he decided to go no mercy. He traced his tongue to find your clit before starting to suck on your clit, he licked and played with your poor pussy until you had cum. You had expected a small break in between like he always did but instead, after you got off of his face, he rushed his t-shirt and jeans off and got between your legs. He shoved his fully erect cock into your tight hole. He didnt even bother with a condom. He rammed and bullied his cock into your without any mercy. You felt like your pussy was on fire. He had grabbed your nipple and played with it gently as he continued his ruthless pumping. He was gonna fuck you so good, it was gonna be the best birthday sex you would ever have for the rest of your life. He left hickies, bite marks and hand prints all over you. Soon enough the two of you finished. "Good birthday sex, baby.. amazing.." he said softly. The two of you had fallen asleep together. Maybe this day wasn't gonna get worse; you thought to yourself.

The End

[huenistar]

the txt members as brainrot

(fuck @/always4gowon u trump supporting bitch i hope u and you mama fall down the fucking stairs, poorly educated prolly a casserole eater (white person) fuck. u dont understand how politics works and u should not have an opinion. i wouldnt be surprised if ur IQ was under 70 because ur dumbass self brings religion into politics but the thing is u believe in a religion that has more sexual abusers and pedophiles than normal, well educated, independent, mentally stable people thats js crazy imo!! hope u get mental help cause something aint right in ur brain, you think slower than the average person and i wouldnt be shocked if u was a white female who lives in Delaware. fuck your racist ass and fuck ur mama for raising you like that)

i dont fuck with the trump supporting individuals, this post WAS but is not inspired by anyone that i know of. idgaf if u “made” this trend or wtv, until u show and tell me you political beliefs and views this post is my idea idgaf

thank u for reading that and i dont give 2 shits if u agree or not, as a woc i have the right to say this idea is mine until you show that ur beliefs are the same as mine. im not giving any credit to a fucker who wants abortion gone, immigrants gone, groceries higher and who brings up religion when we are discussing something that could genuinely affect more than 3 billion lives

doing the txt members cause i didnt script a friend group in my txt dr, and no i do not affiliate myself with that weirdass ho. lets continue on though

YEONJUN | 연준

fein, lunchly, thats what they called me in highschool

“fein fein fein fein” how about u start feining for a job!!!! IM TIRED OF HEARING FEIN

“5 minutes before we go on stage” “fein fein fein fein fein fein feinnn ohhh yeah fein fein” i have unwillingly picked up this habit

“did u guys see that four legged beast over there” “thats what they called me in highschool”

i cant say Shit around rhis man without him saying “thats what they called me in highschool” YOU ARE 25 YEARS OLD.

“i like my cheese drippy bruh” how about i slap u into next week u poorly educated bafoon

SOOBIN | 수빈

gap gap wap wap, 𝓲𝓶 𝓯𝓮𝓮𝓵𝓲𝓷𝓰 𝓯𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓴𝔂 𝓿𝓻𝓸, sigma/beta/alpha

2 am at the dorm, the sounds u will hear is

loud clicking noises (beomgyu playing games)

‘hmmm’ every 5 seconds (yeonjun deciding on what clothes to buy)

laughing and giggling (tyunning watching a tiktok together)

and soobin saying “gap gap wap wap” for the 289th time that day (KEEP IN MIND THAT ITS TWO AM.)

“𝓲𝓶 𝓯𝓮𝓮𝓵𝓲𝓷𝓰 𝓯𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓴𝔂 𝓿𝓻𝓸” ur born in 2000 and im born in 2002 if we think harder about this i have the right to sue u

instead of u saying “𝓲𝓶 𝓯𝓮𝓮𝓵𝓲𝓷𝓰 𝓯𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓴𝔂 𝓿𝓻𝓸” to me how about u get a girlfriend and say that to her u LOSER.

“ur definitely a beta and im definitely an alpha” im employed what does this mean?

“isn’t hueningkai so sigma” uhmmmmm what

BEOMGYU | 범규

livvy dunne, baby gronk, gyat, everything.

most brainrotted of them all. hes too far gone

“oh my gyat what the skibidi!! livvy dunne got a sigma gyat and vro i just saw this edit an epik moa made of me and i look like such a mogger in it instead of a POTATO ;-; 🤫🧏 THOSE WHO KNOW💀💀 gimme mah kookey :c”

he uses any and ALL brainrot from ALL OF THE YEARS. how are u using vro and talking like ur role playing in “Adopt and Raise a Cute Baby🏠” ???

nothing he says makes sense at this point.

TAEHYUN | 태현

i forgor, perchance, paracetamol, galvanized square steel

he’s secretly brainrotted dont let his magic tricks fool u.

“hey taehyun” “wait i forgor” “HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAH😂😂😂😂🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣😭😭😭😭😭😭😂😂😂😂😂”

it was a SPELLING MISTAKE. NOT ME ACTUALLY SAYING I FORGOR.

“i forgor but this might perchance be paracetamol” he MIGHT use sigma every once in a while

“paracetamol, paracetamol, perchance paracetamol”

LORDDDDD SHUTT ITTTT IVE BEEN HEARING GAP GAP WAP WAP, FEIN, GYAT, RIZZ, AND PARACETAMOL ALL DAY.

he tries to be all big, buff and mysterious but if u say perchance he bust out laughing and suddenly everyone can hear him.

he genuinely watches those galvanized square steel videos because he thinks he needs to know how to build a house for 1.982 decilion people.

“perchance this is galvanized square steel and can u get me some… i forgor oh i remember! can u get me some paracetamol?” and keep in mind, HES LAUGHING AS HES SAYING THIS ??

HUENINGKAI | hueningkai in kr

rizz, sus, BOII 🫱🫱🫱, 👌

ik u saw that clip of hueningkai saying taehyun is lizz king.

he uses rizz on a daily basis

“you have so much rizz on stage..” STOP IT.

“this is so sus.. like among us his evil laugh”

i fear he says “BOII” whenever hes playing games with yeonjun

“look at my shoes dude… 👌” you are 22 years old not 12 years old.

“should i turn to my left or right when i do this?” “ur left side looks so sus today.. ur right side has so much rizz!!!”

I ASKED YOU WHICH SIDE LOOKS BETTER NOT WHICH ONE HAS MORE RIZZ.

[kiestrokes]

i like had this thought in the back of my head of like what ateez would be like with an S/O who has a physical illness bcs i actually have one which causes a lot of pain to my bones and i'm like in a constant state of pain and discomfort, been going on for about 12 years HELL YA ✊🏻, if i don't keep up on my meds (currently don't have the proper meds so it only tides me over for a little while-) then im basically fucked so IDK i feel like there isn't a lot of stuff written about this kind of stuff (im a sucker for shit i hardly ever am able to read abt) ALSO IM NOT 100% SURE IF YOUR REQS WERE OPEN BCS I DIDNT SEE ANYTHING POSTED ABT IT SO- YA- if you don't want to write it obviously you don't have to !! no pressure at all lovely

ATEEZ Caring for You: Chronic Illness Edition | SFW

Pairing: ATEEZ x Gender Neutral!Reader/You/Yn Rating: SFW Genre: fluff, slice of life, headcanons, imagines, scenarios. Warnings: chronic illness + immunocompromised talk.

🗝️ Note: Hey atiny anon! You actually asked the right person; I have fibromyalgia combined with a few other annoying chronic illnesses. Because you can't just have one 😓 I hope that you can find a decent fucking doctor and get on the proper medication soon. That's the biggest part of the struggle, finding a physician that will listen and is competent enough. I hope this was enough, I tried to assign each member a caring task that I felt fit them! Has not been beta-ed.

Disclaimers: This is a work of fiction; I do not own any of the idols depicted below. 

Seonghwa 

He’s here to help you prevent all the chronic pain that he can. Booking you massage visits. Trips to the hot springs. All the arnica rubs. Silly little games the two of you play, to keep your mind off the pain and depression spirals. His favorite is seeing who can build their new Lego set the quickest. Hwa is the biggest advocate for you, he would never return a dish at the restaurant when its wrong. But he will fight for you at every appointment, every pharmacy, wherever you need him to. Because he knows you've grown tired of fighting all the time.

Hongjoong

HJ's specialty is flexibility. You have a sudden burst of energy? He’s down to go explore that new pop-up market with you. You’ve come down with a bout of bone numbing pain? That’s cool, you’re getting changed into comfy clothes and piled up on the couch. Swaddled in your heating pad with all the snacks. Where he falls asleep on your shoulder. HJ never gets frustrated with your rapid change in mood or plans. Nothing but the most understanding partner you could ever have asked for, and boy is he so cute and snuggly when dozing on you. Small hands seeking your face for drowsy kisses that soothe your aches just a smidge.

Yunho

The quiet presence, the one who knows what you need before you say it. Passing you tissues, making you a cup of tea and most importantly holding you so that you can cry. Shedding angry tears about how frustrated you are with your own body for betraying you. For feeling weak. For missing out on things. He's gently calming every frayed nerve in your brain. Reassuring you that you're exactly where you need to be in this moment, and he will bring all of the fun to you. And he does, in small, manageable doses.

Yeosang

His way of caring for you is through caring for your outside. All the skin masks, hair treatments, skin softening lotions because if you feel cruddy, at least he can make you feel cute and comfortable. They do heal though, in their own way. The extra moisture of the humidifier and every cream and essence he buffs into your skin helps keep some of the aches away. Subsiding the itchiness of the nerve pain, just a little. And you can’t get over how cute Yeosang looks in each animal themed headband or with his hair tied back into teeny space buns or how nice his hands feel every time they glide over your skin.

San

Where Yunho is quietly attentive, San is passionately attentive. You cry, he cries (while holding you). Quite literally your pain, is his pain and he’s here to be with you through each step. No judgment is ever passed when he has to pick up your extra chores around the house. Because to him, that is the smallest act of service he can perform for you. San is the one who wishes he could take on your pain, that he could fight it and destroy it and it pains him that he cannot. So he will simply have to do everything else.

Mingi

He thrives on making you laugh and smile through tough days, because he understands feeling burdensome. Mingi never wants you to feel that way, he wants to make sure you verbally know that your presence is needed and welcome. His favorite thing is cuddled up in bed with you wrapped in your heated blanket watching shows. You looking so small in his arms, giving him the feeling of protecting something. He reassures you constantly, because he himself seeks constant reassurance. Mingi never tires of this, he will reaffirm every single self deprecating thought with a compliment even on his worst days.

Wooyoung 

He cares for you with his skinship, which is incredibly healing. His happy heartbeat encourages yours. His strong hands make you feel loved and needed. Who would cuddle him if not you? Woo often reminds you, whispering the phrase into your ear as he traces his nails through your hair, or while rhythmically drawing circles on your spine. Making you float into dream land and anchoring you in the moment with him at the same time. Woo also loves making you whatever dish you’re craving, knowing you need energy to fight off fatigue and pain. And cooking is one of his many, many love languages.

Jongho

Needing to hoard all the extra rest you can get; you seek out solace at Jongho’s place for nap time. Jongho has taken notice, he’s also taken inventory as to which blankets of his you prefer, the pillows that keep you asleep the longest, what temperature you prefer the room to be based on what you’re wearing. All your favorite snacks before or after. New blackout curtains. He’s made his place your ultimate nap zone. New heated blankets. Duplicates of your fave lounge wear and socks. And he takes his payment in cuddles. Holding you tightly in his bed or sprawled on the couch. Sometimes he falls asleep himself and flips you onto your back to bury into your side like a full-sized teddy bear.

© COPYRIGHT 2023 by kiestrokes All rights reserved. No portion of this work may be reproduced without written permission from the author. This includes translations.

[loving-family-poll]

(Confession) I think I’ve got some fucked up cheryl blossom shit going on. growing up I was isolated as an only child literally living in the middle of the woods with only immediate family and I had imaginary friends to keep me company. But they weren’t friends to me. They were my siblings. I actually fucking called them Sister and Brother. Like that was their names.

I was so lonely growing up I used to write fanfiction about me having a twin brother. I wanted someone my age to play with and be close to and I was always drawn to sibling type characters as well as emotionally incestous stories but I didn’t know what that was back then because I was so young. I knew objectively incest was wrong but I was so desperate for someone to be mine, to be close with me and stuck with me so they couldn’t leave me like my friends had as the years went by.

I have two cousins, both a few days apart from me in age. One a guy, one a girl. For some reason I always wanted a brother specifically, I couldn’t tell you why. This guy cousin, I’ll call him Scott, felt like the answer that I had prayed for. I used to daydream about him being my brother. Similar to an anon a while back, we physically fought a lot. I bested him everytime because I’m a buff girlboss or something. I was obsessed with him and there definitely was some emotionally incestous stuff going on from my end—and from what I’ve observed over the years, especially pretty recently now that we are in college, it seems he’s physically attracted to me.

Whats strange about this is im not physically attracted to him. I’m not physically attracted to men at all, really. I’ve always liked women. They were what my first sexual fantasies were about, the first porn I watched, I could go on. Somehow I didnt realize that I liked women until highschool even though I did all of that. It was all because of a movie I watched and I fell in love with the movie character who was a woman and I realized oh. I’ve never felt that way about any of my boyfriends before, or even Scott. Like not even comparably close. That weird nervousness I had around him paled completely compared to the feeling I have for women.

I didnt feel this call for a sister as desperately as I did a brother, but I think that might have been because I always found it easy to become close with other women. An example of how this affected my realization of my sexuality was that I definitely had love for my best friend who I only knew for a year. I’m not sure if I was really in love, but when she moved away it was absolutely fucking horrible. I wrote her letters and left kiss marks on them as my signature and I cried every day for months imagining kissing her before she left “as sisters”. Like that was an actual verbatim thought I had. As sisters. I thought about telling her I loved her and eventually this led to my having fantasies about her etc etc etc. I never thought anything about it until years later.

The other cousin I mentioned, I’ll call her Laura, definitely had some emotional + physical incestuous feelings for me as we grew up. She used to beg me to shower with her, bathe with her, skinny dip with her, do anything and everything with her. She once begged me to let her shave my pubes. I have never had good boundaries and I didn’t really see a reason to say no even though it make me a bit nervous. She was the one with sisters, this was just some sister ritual that I didn’t understand because I had no siblings. So I let her do whatever she wanted and I catered to whatever she asked of me. Over time she started to pull away from me and I didn’t understand, hadnt I done everything she had wanted of me?

About eight years passed where I barely saw her but I learned to live with it because essentially the same ghosting happened with my friends in school. I didn’t understand why they left me but I couldn’t change it so I went with the flow. But randomly she started talking to me again. It was weird because it felt like we were getting along way better than we had before which I hadn’t even noticed was strained. And she was flirting with me. Telling me that my makeup looked so pretty on me, that my hair smelled good, and that she loved my dimples. I smiled at her once and she said, “ohmigosh, you have dimples. I love dimples on girls.”

Very quickly we made it clear without being explicit that we both were into girls one night. Nothing happened, but I think being open like that made her decide to stick by my side for the rest of the visit, unlike her usual routine, and she made me sleep in bed with her and go everywhere with her, like when we were kids.

Then she got a boyfriend.

Last visit I was dejected but happy for her because she seemed so much more happy than she had at any other time in her life. But then, I think, she made a move on me. We were at the local pool at nighttime, all alone. She mentioned wanting some ice cream before the shop closed next to the pool and because my love language seems to be acts of service and turning into mush when pretty girls bat their eyelashes, I very unsubtly ran off to get her ice cream. I think she knew by then that she had me in her clutches because her entire mood changed.

She came up close to me as she ate and very slowly crowded me against the wall. I was like an actual pile of mush trying and failing to eat my own icecream as she talked and I got that feeling in my chest, one I had never had with Scott, ever. She reached to me and adjusted my swim top strap and then brushed my hair out of my face and my body actually buckled. I had thought I was a top up until that point but im. I guess not. And then she fucking asked me if I thought the two of us would be able to fit into the bathtub together, again, like we used to.

I said yes and we rushed off back to the house and I was in the bathroom waiting for her and….she never came in. I went out to see where she was and she was with our grandfather and I did actually subtly ask her did you want to take a bath or anything? Because I’ll take a shower if not….and she told me she was just going to wait etc etc etc. and then I remembered. Her fucking boyfriend. Shit.

If Laura asked I would do absolutely anything for her. I think with Scott we have this Something Weirder Than Sex shit going on and I don’t know what to do on either front.

This is long as fuck but a good read that shit w Laura is wild

[kipperlillyforpresident]

I’m so sorry but I gotta jump in as a guy who’s normal about warrior cats to offer some ideas that are mostly vibe and less similar to their real names:

For Lucy, Frostwish is honestly perfect but something like Echofrost could be nice- also the -heart suffix is often for very noble cats but Frostheart reads a little weird so I’d go with Flurryheart or something in that case

others: Frostflame or Flurryflame, Shiverheart, Brightfrost

For Kipperlilly, I like having Lily somewhere in the name because lilies are horrendously toxic to cats, also she needs four syllables it’s non negotiable. She’s Mad so there’s a fair chance of her getting a -claw name but I don’t really like that for her, I kind of am partial to Flicker as a prefix both for sound and because it’s sort of associated with fire (any name associated with the colour red would also be good for this reason)

various ideas: Flickerpetal, Cinderlily, Ripplewhisker

Ivyshade is also really good and Ivy is just already a great prefix, my only other ideas would be variations on that— Fernshade, Ivythorn, Ivydusk

Berrybee is 10/10, only other ideas is Bumbleberry

For Oisín I’m with you on the storm stuff, naturally— Stormclaw keeps it simple, otherwise Adderstorm to keep a reptilian element. Bonus: Oisín means “little deer”, it’s cute to think he got named something like Fawnkit and then got super buff so the leader was just like “uhh Fawnstorm”

Ruben: existing names that give a similar vibe to “hop” would be like,, Spring, Leap, Flight, Step- flight is funny to me because he’s getting mobbed for autographs he’s gotta go- I’m partial to the idea of him getting named Shellkit and later receiving an emo suffix but I don’t know what that would be jfjjfjdk.

ideas: Shellfang, Shellsong, Hopleap, Whistlespring (wait no that’s gorgug), Whistleflight

Buddy,,, hoo buddy. He’d be given a Sun name more than likely, Dawn or Sun or Ray or something, I kind of like the idea of Sundapple (patchy sunlight, wavering faith) but it sounds like a juice flavour. Risingdawn, Dawncloud, Sunfall, Lightseed

Bonus round: Kristen as Applebee for the meme, Porter rising to power as Shatterstar, Fig as Houndheart because German shepherd mode

bonus bonus: kipperlilly would hate to be average and unremarkable. Imagine she gets a suffix like -fur or -tail or -pelt

you and me discussing warrior cat names.

THESE ARE ALL SO GOOOD. and YES i had thought about the -heart suffix, but i agreed it seemed like. well. it seemed like an insult. cold-hearted. but flurryheart is soo cute.

and all of your alt kipperlilly names... all so good.... this is the one universe where she wont be bullied for her name. WE ALL HAVE NAMES LIKE FLICKERPETAL!!!

and omg. fawnstorm is adorable.

and omg i didnt even think abt tying in his beach era. shell is such a cute prefix for him. it also makes me feel like all of the rat grinders are in riverclan tbh. because the bad kids are sooo thunderclan coded right. and so au where tbk and trg are just fighting over sunningrocks. (btw sunningrocks belongs to riverclan idgaf. THEYRE USING IT TO HUNT!! THOSE THUNDERCLAN FUCKS JUST WANT TO SUNBATHE!!!)

also sundapple does have such a cool meaning but ur right it is soooo juice coded JKNHGH.

and ohg my god waaittt. me when Phoenixstar (aguefort) renames Graystone (porter) into Shatterstone after a brutal injury .... and then Shatterstone and Shimmerdust (jace) kill him.... and Shatterstar rises to power...

[calx-bdo]

haikaveh oneshots

kaveh frowns seeing the surplus food in the fridge.

no, not because of his "lack of favourites" (to which there are many soups, thank you.), but it's rather due to the fact that alhaitham's food was also in the fridge. all of it.

kaveh's not dumb, he can pick up on his roommate's eating habits quickly. especially the significant lack of appetite. (urgh, this one worries kaveh the MOST.) but not to the extent of leaving food out altogether.

hence, kaveh makes one very quick trip to the bazaar to grab a quick snack for alhaitham. this one recently hit the shelves, and kaveh's sure that alhaitham would most definitely enjoy this. "taste supersedes presentation.." kaveh can already hear alhaitham's voice boring into his skull.

well, that's the whole reason kaveh fell in love with him in the first place. kaveh returns home with a skip in his step, rapting his knucles kightly on alhaitham's door before entering.

"haitham?" his voice takes on a softer tone, peering inside the dimly lit room. "oh, عزیزم, are you.. alright?" kaveh's warm gaze landed on the pile and mountain of books stacked upon one another, alhaitham's hair in a tight grasp. if kaveh didnt know any more, he could say alhaitham is one tick away from completely losing his hold onto his sanity.

kaveh repeats the soft nickname. "عزیزم?"

only then does alhaitham look up, circular glasses slipping off his nose.

alhaitham's cracked voice mumbles out. "حبيبي .."

"my sweet boy, are you alright?" kaveh immediately rushed to alhaitham's side, his food left forgotten on the table. kaveh's hands cupped his cheeks slowly, fingers softly brushing across his cheeks. his red eyes took one look across the table and the numerous coffee mug stains and lets out a tut.

"alhaitham. what did i tell you about proper sustenance?" at this point, kaveh's just playing with his hair, alhaitham's face buried into his waist as his buff hands (feeble scholar my ass!) wrapped tightly around his waist. "mmmfhh.." came alhaitham's reply, a little muffled.

"okay okay, just.. be sure to eat your food, alright? the aunties at the bazaar gave me these free food, and it's fresh, so be sure to eat it while it's hot! and.. jeez, alhaitham. stop drinking so much coffee! i'm starting to think that your blood is pure caffeine."

alhaitham nods at his words, burying his face furthur into kaveh's body.

a smile blossomed on kaveh's face.

───

babe in persian = عزیزم

حبيبي= my love in arabic

───

kaveh was (again) dusting off the numerous books that lined every inch of their house, when he spots a surprisingly new book. his fingers traced the words on the spine as he read the title.

"28 recipes for Soups! (most loved by moms and grandmas alike!)"

that got kaveh thinking. he clearly didn't purchase this, and both alhaitham and him didn't receive any cookbooks as presents. cyno and tighnari don't really care for food, and he doesn't know any chef that might have lent him this book. that only leaves one option - alhaitham purchased this book.

.. what for?? kaveh is confused. has alhaitham even expressed any interest in cooking?

whatever. kaveh shoves that book into the back of his mind before continuing on.

it isn't literally 5 minutes later that he finds yet another cookbook on alhaitham's shelves.

"okay. what the fuck. did these multiply or what?" kaveh pulled the book out of the shelf and scanned it again.

"27 new recipes for Soups! (limited edition, new stock!)

limited-?! alarm bells immediately go off in kaveh's head. limited? alhaitham is definitely the type to go scrambling after a book when he discovers that there's limited stock, claiming "he must have it!" and it's "a precious rarity". but a.. cookbook? alhaitham's worries extends to this type of books too?

jeez.

out of curiosity, kaveh placed the duster down on a nearby table before flipping the book open. one recipe catches his eye.

"...cream mushroom soup...liyue parsley... matsutake mushrooms and enoki mushrooms..." kaveh mumbles to himself. why does all these ingredients sound so familiar?

it clicks in his head. it's what he ate yesterday.

wait. wait. alhaitham... specially went out of his way to buy this limited edition book, learn to cook to the best of his ability, did all of this.. for him?

a warm feeling tugs at his heart.

the very next night, alhaitham flips open the book to see a green (the very shade of his little dendro mirrors too!) post-it on the next recipe.

"thank you for all you do love. even buying the limited edition books, hmm? <3

- k 💛"

crimson red blooms all over alhaitham's pale face.

what a tease.

───

this is doing very little to help alhaitham's stress.

alhaitham and kaveh promised to go visit and see nilou's dance at zubayr theatre, even though alhaitham's autism and sensory issues make it a problem for him to be comfortable in the crowded grand bazaar. this, kaveh knows.

so when kaveh turns his head to look at alhaitham, in a moment of pure madness, alhaitham tries to mask his discomfort by flashing a small smile.

kaveh immediately gets suspicious.

alhaitham isn't one to smile. especially not at performances. the only time theres ever a curl upwards on his lips is when he's reading a book, and mocking the author for their "extreme lack of knowledge" and their "stupidity knows no bounds.". once, kaveh even heard him utter "common sense is apparently not common anymore. what kind of nonsense are these authors spilling into their books? they don't deserve their works published. goodness."

that was the most hatred kaveh has ever seen anyone express to an inanimate object. yes, kaveh's rantings to mehrak isn't counted! he isn't even that heated when ranting! and mehrak isn't inanimate! ugh!

kaveh grips alhaitham's forearms tighter. "oh? crap."

a tear rolls down alhaitham's cheeks. "kaveh, people keep touching me and i-"

"i'm sorry lovely.. i shouldn't have dragged you through a crowd. i wasn't thinking."

kaveh brings up a hand to caress alhaitham's cheeks.

"let's go home, okay?"

they both fall in step to walk home together.

"we can invite the others for dinner later." kaveh's hand tightly grips alhaitham's.

"is that okay?"

───

` i feel like i need to explain here. whilst i'm not autistic myself, i watched aimee's videos (shwimzii on tiktok, go check her videos out, theyre great!) and this oneshot mostly revolves around the nilou's dance tiktok (the thumbnail is nilou, here's the link)

alhaitham is depicted overwhelmed by the sensory overload and starts to cry, hence i implemented this into the story. if there's anything wrong with it or anything i had written wrongly, please don't hesitate to tell me!

───

kaveh comes across a picture of alhaitham and him in their old akademiya uniforms.

he picks up the frame and examines the picture.

archons, they look super young. like, dont have eyebags under their eyes young. like, no callouses and ink stains on their hands young.

"kaveh? what's that..?" alhaitham walked over to kaveh's side, hand wrapping around his waist. kaveh flushes at this. even though they've been dating for so long, kaveh still feels like a young schoolboy in love.

which takes them back to this picture.

"oh. i recall now. i remember when i had stuck to your side alot, since..."

kaveh patiently waits for alhaitham to finish his sentence.

"my grandmother and parents had recently passed away."

kaveh swears alhaitham's grip on him tightens.

"oh, عزیزم.."

kaveh mumbles out, placing a chaste kiss to alhaitham's cheek.

.

"hello! i'm kaveh, a second year student at the akademiya, assigned to guide you! what's your name?"

alhaitham looks at the hand extended to him.

"oookay, no name then! what darshan are you in? i'm in kshahrewar, the architecture darshan!"

it takes a while for alhaitham to mumble out a soft "haravatat."

"ooh, haravatat! that's a rare darshan due to the complicated runes!" kaveh beams at the boy's response.

alhaitham nods silently.

"well then, shall we explore the school? mr..."

this time, alhaitham responds rather quickly.

"alhaitham. my name is alhaitham."

"what a beautiful name! let's go around the school, okay alhaitham? it's big, so it's easy to get lost."

alhaitham followed kaveh around the school.

surprise surprise, when they reached the library, alhaitham immediately turned on his feet and left.

"hey, what? what's going on?" kaveh asked, very confused about alhaitham's apparent dislike of the library.

"i have no need for the library."

at kaveh's confusion, alhaitham further elaborates.

"i have more resources at home."

alhaitham following kaveh around proves to be a common sight around the akademiya. there's even a new joke floating around.

"whereever the blonde goes, the falcon follows."

haha, very funny.

alhaitham's relation to the falcon is an interesting one, however. the falcon is not a common rune to be found in, however, alhaitham's studies usually tend to revolve around runes of the sort revolving around this particular animal. kaveh swears he even saw a carving of the falcon on alhaitham's desk. and it's not just falcons too, all kinds of birds were present in alhaitham's home.

it was kinda cute, if kaveh's being honest. he wonders if he should tell alhaitham about the pet bird he has.

"alhaitham, you seem to be interested in birds!" kaveh mentions in the akademiya's cafeteria, seeing alhaitham engrossed in a book.

"mhm! there's many different species of birds, but my favourite personally is the falcon. did you know that like fennec foxes, falcons mate for life? and that peregerine falcons are able to migrate 15,500 miles every year! and..." alhaitham continues to ramble excitedly about different bird facts, mostly falcon related.

"say, alhaitham, why do you like vultures and falcons so much?" kaveh asks one day.

"mm, no idea. vultures are just, cool, i guess. and falcons..they were my mother's favourite. i try to think about her, remember her, but it's hard. the only way i feel like i can really honor her is to.. well, research something about her. it's.. painful, to say the least. but it hurts less with you."

a fond smile erupts on kaveh's lips.

───

day after day, alhaitham finds himself running his fingers through kaveh's hair again and again.

it's so smooth, so silky..

that's why alhaitham took it upon himself to maintain kaveh's hair.

he observed the crappy shampoos that kaveh uses. it's not good quality, and it's too rough on the scalp. unacceptable.

alhaitham knows that good shampoos are sold in sumeru. in the grand bazaar. that crowded place.

he grits his teeth.

"kaveh, i'm going out for a while. be back soon."

"oh, okay handsome, stay safe!" kaveh's voice rings out from the study.

not even a mere 10 minutes later, alhaitham returns home, with a weird plastic packaging that he's holding onto like it's a lifeline, and evident tear stains on his cheeks.

"..alhaitham? what's wrong? love, did you go somewhere crowded? oh dear, come in, don't stand outside! my love, are you okay?" kaveh rattles off questions, and alhaitham can merely stand there.

"i bought this for you." alhaitham took out a bottle of shampoo, the price tag clearly scratched off.

"it's for you. i know you dont do well with expensive gifts, but.. i want you to accept this."

his gift is met with kaveh's lips on his lips, capturing him in a soft kiss as kaveh wraps his hand around alhaitham's neck.

"i love you, so much."

───

[redswaberkez]

ok so its been more than a month since my graphic screen is arrived and bein used almost every day for 6-12 hours its time to do a lil review under the cut

(obligatory warning for longreads my english is a crap and yada yada) my bby boaris (kabanchik) cintiq 16'. (old one from 2020) I bought the tablet for a loot of reasons, Very Reasonable ones and not so reasonable too LMAO. Earned money with blood and sweat (literally💥) ANYWAY. Tablet's size is perfect for my needs, not way too small, not way too big, the screen workspace is the same with my old laptop (give or take few mm) This cintiq isnt from manufactor, its used before tablet from someone else in 'from the assembly line' condition. As soon as tab arrived i immediately ordered a ptotective film to prevent the appearance of The Hole. You what im talking about.

I was afraid that it would be extremely inconvenient for me to work with it and that the purchase would generally be unsuccessful, because before ONCE IN MY LIFE 7 yrs ago i had an experience w cintiq 24' and it wasnt really comfortable then. AND i had always used a regular plain tablet. BUT NOOOPE everything is PERFECT and i love it.

PROS!! - brain loves to see what u are actually drawing. Its easier to control every single move and stroke therefore it drastically buffs your skill. The progress of it development i mean. U have to get used to it. the tablet itself wont give u a 'make my skill insane button' u have to WORK ON IT obviously. (says the one who've been stuck in cps for a month straight OUGH) - it works as another monitor. so u can do whatever u wish using two of them. or u can just buy random tablet screen and use it as a SINGLE monitor lmaooo. -doesnt overheat (my main display overheats noticeably thank god i dont need to place my arm over it). -uses one single thicc cable which divides into three at the end (usb hdmi and power cables) - thin, from 1cm to 1,5cm +-, wheights somewhere 1,5kgs, has small stand legs which gives it ahh +- 30 degrees tilt angle. U can travel with the tablet but it needs pc or laptop to be connected with. -i havent seen its guts but i bet the circuits are...fine... i hope so.. at least if it wont overheat then the circuits wont burn down.. makes sense.. yeah.... -I also didnt notice any problems with drivers or connection for this month. u just turn ur pc on and ready to go.

CONS. - ur neck is bout to die if u gonna work like me cuz its tilt is only 30 degs (u can buy a normal stand tho. or a monitor bracket and stop torturing urself). SHRIMP POSTURE CHEEEECK. - it doesn't have buttons like my tablet had. Its a taste preference honestly. for someone its a pros for me its a cons. EASILY COUNTERS BY it might seem crazy what im bout to say A KEYBOARD. you just need to get used to it. again. - should i even mention the price? ofc its a con. since mine is a former usage one it was a lil cheaper than usually. but I knew what I was buying ((WACOM)) so i aint complaining now. - small really small con: sometimes cps wont react to pen button clicks but ig its even a program problem than tablets (easily counters by pressing space button one time). its really just a biiit annoying and nothing special. It works great all of the time. - THE PEN TIP WEARS OFF WITH FIRST COSMIC VELOCITY. ig its affected by protective film (its matte). counters by TITAN PEN TIP (plus now its a weapon if u are brave enough) -due to its protective matte film there is a small insignificant diffs between two screens but its not really this big. At least between mine displays. Diff btw my old laptop screen colors and tablet is fucking HUGE (lap is a 12 yrs old veteran have some respect🙄) - OK OK OK LAST LITTLE NIGGLE. Since I play shooters like valorant and...cs.. and move my hand powerfully across the table, I HAD to look for *that very specific place* for the tablet so that everything would be perRRRFECT by millimeters (ocd moment)

notable mention that takes a special place in my heart

wait while we talk to your displays 😥😥😥😥 omg..... cried....died.... my sons...

thats all i can say for now

[omegawolverine]

QUESTION!!!! what do you think stu’s opinions on the walking dead would be? what characters do you think he would like? characters he’d hate? what about how the zombies are portrayed? or how the storytelling is or how the writing is in general?

(this is peak autism for me lol :3 i have thought about this and wanted to ask you and forgot til now)

eeeee this is also peak autism for me ive been obsessed with twd since i was literally in the 5th grade and was reading carl x readers daily that's how you KNOW its serious

anyways!!! i think stu would enjoy the earlier seasons but get really bored during alexandria and no amount of hot jeffrey dean morgan can fix that. he'd probably stop watching and then pick back up during the last couple seasons when it picks up pace again and he'd REALLY like some of the spin offs (namely ones who live bc his bisexuality makes a show about michonne and rick specifically perfect for him, theyre like eye candy to him)

he'd think the visuals, gore and sets/locations are fantastic and are a large part of what drew him in during s1 bc the story didnt really work for him until the later half of s2 and early s3 when it gets real brutal. that's not to say he thinks its bad, he just has a short attention span and he obvs loves watching action driven horror bc it means more blood and guts so once the show picks up he gets real into it. he probably forces billy to watch it weekly with him while its airing even tho billy is very meh towards the show.

in terms of how the zombies are portrayed, i think he'd like it. its leans towards classic and stu is a man of classic horror so you wont find him complaining. he really thinks any portrayal of zombies is fine as long as theyre scary enough. fast zombies, slow zombies, zombies that can climb or whatever the fuck those zombies in army of the dead are doing where they like perform rituals and have a buff zombie king with intelligence, he doesnt give af as long as it looks disgusting and horrifying.

as for characters...here's a bit of an unnecessarily long breakdown:

s1: he'd like shane at the beginning (he can get that he thought rick was dead so he doesnt fault him for screwing his wife), he'd def think glenn is a sweetheart and have a soft spot for him, he'd find lori annoying but not really care that much and he'd have conflicting feelings about daryl. on one hand, aggressive asshole's are kind of his fave, on the other, s1 daryl is the worsttttt. any other characters either dont stick out to him or they die too quick to be relevant.

s2: he'd stopped liking shane halfway through s1 for the obvious but now he's become insufferable and stu cannot wait for him to die (bc he knew it was coming, they couldnt stick with a loose canon like that), he also really cannot stand lori now and he finds dale to be increasingly annoying even if he is right about things like half the time. daryl is now his fave but glenn is a close second. he likes rick now too! he was neutral on him in s1 bc he was just kind of a good guy and stu likes more edge to his characters, but now rick is finally getting that. he thinks the new farm characters are nice enough but the only one that really stands out is maggie and he has mixed feelings on her but they lean towards positive. he doesnt like andrea but he doesnt hate her.

s3: stu has mixed feelings on michonne but thinks she's gorgeous and he fucks with the sword and how brutal she is so he hopes she sticks around. carl is growing on him, he likes that he's a bit cold compared to the other older characters. he's glad lori is dead as hell but misses tdog a bit even if he did fuck all. he likes carol!! she's not a fave but he's grown an appreciation towards her. hershel is okay, beth is probably his least favorite but he doesnt hate her. he thinks the whole governor plot is badass but he cannot stand the governor or merle as characters. andrea is really insufferable to him now. he doesnt care for sasha or tyreese but theyre like so irrelevant at the moment anyways. glenn is still his goat and so is daryl but his attachment to merle pisses him off.

i wont go past that bc ik ur still on s3 but just know he will have a major hard on for negan despite all the bullshit he pulls (and maybe even partially bc of it, that bat and all the murder does something for him) and he'd also love rosita <3