#I AM in fact insane for this and I am valid.

[essektheylyss]

I was reminded of this fic I wrote and honestly, still bummed that no one ever noticed (or at least pointed out) that I snuck in a description of the Pietà.

It's pretty quick but it was in fact intentional.

[lotus-pear]

free will is drawing ur two favorite characters together and making them gay

[swinging-stars-from-satellites]

everyone STOP going insane. you should be going to BED

[deancasforcutie]

happy five years to canon bisexual Dean Winchester! 🩷💜💙

[danielsarmand]

been offered a coffee by three (3) clients today i did give in an accept one offer because i skipped breakfast and slept 5 hours but should i accept every single one i get daily i would be dead and buried because i'm italian so when i say coffee i mean espresso shots

[the-moogle-of-your-nightmares]

i truly love making people mad by applying basic reading comprehension to the words that are in front of me instead of using telepathy to intuit that a stranger means the exact opposite of what they said, using my block button, and moving on with my life

[hanktalkin]

Okay I had A Thot. Isabela finding out basically the whole barracks is butch4butch, and simply cannot wrap their head around the fact they find Aveline like the pinnacle of female beauty. But Im also kind of split because this theoretical fic could be

From Isabela’s perspective. Maybe working out some of her issues.

Partially from Aveline’s perspective? Because also a core about this is that Aveline doesn’t believe she’s desirable either, or at the very least fundamentally doubts it to the point Isabela can drive a dagger into that one weak point for years upon years. So like, I don’t want to have it be Isabela both be the one who reaffirms her and the source of her low self esteem in the first place, per their act 3 conversation. Can my girl get a little external validation please?

I think. That no one avebela fic has quite scratched the itch for me because theres plenty where aveline needs to work out her issues to be a worthwhile partner (or even just a decent fuck buddy) to isabela but i’ve yet to see anything tackling isabela’s butchphobia/general hatred of gender nonconformity. Which i feel. Has to be something she’s challenged on in order to be similarly good partner to aveline

[edenfenixblogs]

I was having a rough night so I went to my favorite funny website IsMercuryInRetrograde.com

I’m not a huge believer in astrology, but the website only has two pages:

If it’s in retrograde it says yes, which feels weirdly validating.

If it’s not in retrograde it just says “No, something else must be bumming you out,” which always gives me a little chuckle.

Fun silly website. Yay.

Except this time

YES. SOMETHING ELSE IS BUMMING ME OUT.

The fact that unless I lock myself in a room with only pre-written or pre-recorded material that I’ve already read or watched and know is safe I CANNOT GO TWELVE FUCKING HOURS WITHOUT HEARING ABOUT THIS FUCKING WAR.

It’s killing me. There are no breaks. I open any website or social media app and it’s an immediate bombardment of info about the war. I go watch a YouTube video and then there’s a fundraiser at the end.

I flip through channels and see news about an antisemitic attack or a bombing in Gaza or Rafah.

I leave notifications on and get a text from a friend who sees a “rape is resistance” sticker on her walk home from school.

I go to look for pride merch and see watermelon merch mixed in as if war is some kind of gay accessory. I look through a fandom tag and see cartoon characters in a kids cartoon drawn with Palestinian flags.

It’s fucking endless. It’s insane. I just wanted a few days without having to think about all of it so I could recharge and I haven’t even been able to go a continuous 12 hour stretch without something or someone shoving the whole thing in my face.

It’s not healthy to live like this. I already have PTSD. And I’m trying with all my might not to retreat fully within myself but this is fucking killing me.

And I am someone who is pro peace and pro ceasefire and pro Palestinian welfare and anti-Likud but also anti-antisemitism. I do nothing but promote interfaith and intercultural organizations devoted to fostering peace. I want this war over.

And yet I’m fucking stuck in this perpetual hellhole of awful news and constant imagery about war and death and antisemitism and Palestinian suffering. And it’s too much. Why can’t I even go 12 hours. It’s killing me.

The fucking mercury in retrograde website‽ YES. SOMETHING ELSE IS BUMMING ME OUT AND ITS YOU.

[zyk1ng]

I was gonna make this post way way earlier but I forgot lol but Uhm

I have played through the splatoon 2 story fully and am replaying it (for a future post bc a lot of the dialogue is rlly funny) and honestly while I absolutely loved it it makes me even sadder that splat 2’s story mode was kinda tossed aside (for valid reasons ofc) because it’s so Cool.

Excluding the gameplay, I think they did marie so well, because she sells the desperation of someone who’s got nobody she knows by her side. While she of course keeps the sassy attitude of sneak dissing her best friends (agent 3) and also telekinetically telling you to fuck off if you talk to her too much it’s very clear she genuinely cares so much about agent 4 and is so grateful they’re doing what they do.

these are only two screenshots of 8(?) of Marie randomly being really sentimental to 4 because this stranger chose to help her in her time of need rather than just ignore this GROWN WOMAN hanging out on a sewer drain

It’s like heavily emphasized multiple times that Marie could not be more grateful for 4’s help in retrieving not just the zapfish but also her cousin.

But then revealing that 4 knew about Callie the WHOLE TIME (I have a lot to say about this part but it’s mostly hc so) which is so KIND OF THEM???? this random woman recruits them into a secret military agency and hides the fact she rlly misses her cousin but they help anyway bc they WANT TO. (They didn’t even know either of them were famous btw) Marie shows a lot of gratitude toward 4 ESPECIALLY after the big reveal.

(You could make arguments for 3 being similar bc an old kook made them do it but this isn’t about them..)

And it’s not just being grateful for the one time, she genuinely enjoys 4’s company and wants to be better friends with them and chat after the zapfish and Callie are saved 😭😭😭

It’s so cute too, because 100%ing the game and even just being a little nosy is something that Marie picks up on, and remembers way later in the game. (More abt this later)

god I love this socially inept squid woman and her adopted child soldier that likes finding pieces of paper

Speaking of said soldier! I think the way they characterized 4 via the actual gameplay rather than art/statements/whatever is so cool

4 doesn’t have many illustrations besides the chaos splatfest and that one group photo where they’re being funky in the corner (and the apartment) but I feel like the reason for that is the fact that a lot of Marie’s dialogue as well as how splatoon 2’s hero mode is structured/designed speaks a lot about how they wanted to represent 4.

From a realistic standpoint, of course splatoon 2’s story mode has to be more creative both prompt wise and secret wise. But it feels like the reason its that way is because both 4 and Marie are separate types of people from Craig and 3.

The bosses help a lot with this too, being more gimmicky and weird (subtracting stamp.) Octo shower and samurai being bosses where you have to either react well or change your positioning to effectively beat them. (Octo shower is my fave btw I loved fighting it the first time)

The level design also shines in this aspect because if I’m honest I remember none of the splat 1 levels significantly besides the few octoling ones. Splatoon 2’s levels are very detailed (and also insanely pretty) and have some rlly fun puzzles in a handful of them and even the more fast ones are a blast to play through

And then all the little extras (sardiniums and scrolls alike) are hidden so well and you usually have to go out of your way to find them and even the secrets that aren’t either of those things have substance

Small note, a lot of extras are also made so that it flows well with the levels design (like the first dualie request mission) which is also extremely fucking cool.

the way marie touches on those little discoveries is so smart too because it (as I said before) characterizes 4 as someone who loves to look for things even if it’s on a whim especially since the sunken scrolls in the game are so much harder to find than in splat1.

And the fact that unlike splat 1, you can (technically) 800% the game by playing EVERY SINGLE LEVEL WITH EVER SINGLE WEAPON TYPE. to me it feels like it deepens the fact that 4 likes to be really thorough. marie goes “you have a problem.” When you break like two hidden egg crates in this one level and it’s so great.

I love what they’ve done with 4, whether it was intentional or I’m over-analytical.

Nothing gets past them, looking in every nook and cranny whether or not there’s secrets to be found. They’re too nosy and thorough and they like to be around marie after completing missions, they don’t know who the squid sisters are, hate balloons, may or may not be ok, have impulsive secret finding, partake in many extracurriculars, can be needy at times, go with the flow and they apparently smell better than agent 3.

Agent four, of the New Squidbeak Splatoon.

[rodolfoparras]

ah your professor price drabble done killed me i'm so insane about him.

i love professor student dynamics but they almost always have sub/bottom reader if you can even find male reader which is just... yeah. BUT YOUR WRITING OH MY GODS. it's edible i'm literally gnawing on professor price who finally found a student to challenge him and immediately wants to fuck. so valid. i too am attracted to people who are willing to have academic banter with me, price, you're so real.

also imagine fucking him over his desk after hours and joking about it being for extra credit he would be so annoyed dnajndakd

-🪔

Genuinely nothing brings me more joy than taking stereotypical tropes and roles and swapping them around because why not I want body guard/ royalty trope where price is the royalty and falls for the body guard I want professor price who’s head over heels for a student I want secretary loser price falling for ceo reader

Pt 1 of professor!Price x student!reader

Cw: age gap, reader is in his 20s!!!, professor student relationship, power dynamics, price is a bit of a creep, 18+

Okay but hear me out… jealous professor!Price

Price doesn’t like you. He couldn’t- shouldn’t. He’s a professor and you’re his student. If anything, these little fantasies were just that, fantasies, a way of getting through a boring work day.

Was it wrong? Sure. But it’s not like he plans on acting on them so might as well indulge in them.

Fuck he sounds like a perverted old man but he can’t find it in himself to care as he unbuttons his pants, takes his weeping cock in his hand, while thinking of your interactions from the day, can’t help but wear a plug to work, stretching the tight ring of muscles, preparing himself as if you’d fuck him after the lecture, can’t help but live off of these fantasies til he gets home for the day, and fucks himself with one of his dildos while imaging it’s your cock instead.

Fantasies.

That’s what it is.

Nothing more nothing less.

However he finds himself less sure about his feelings when he’s one day standing at the front of the lecture hall, arms crossed and brow raised, staring at the random student sitting a bit too close to you.

“Professor Price I have a question…”

The sound of another student’s voice snaps him out of his trance, heat creeping up his face and and vehemently avoiding your questioning gaze while proceeding to answer the student’s question.

Later on when the lecture ends he notices you and the same student from earlier walking out together. Price proceeds to packs up his stuff, all while continuously thinking about who that student was.

He hasn’t seen this kid hanging out with you before. The fact that the two of you were friends seemed so bizarre since- No. He shouldn’t dwell on it. He had no business questioning who you were and weren’t friends with. Besides he couldn’t be jealous now right? He didn’t like you that way. He didn’t like you at all.

That random student’s name turned out to be Tim and in a short amount of time you’d become very close friends with him to the point where you and him would be whispering about in class. Price would purposely interrupt your discussion with a question thinking you wouldn’t be able to answer him but you’d always be prepared, sounding and looking as confident as ever while answering his question and - fuck he couldn’t help the blood rushing to his dick as you confidently answered him. You were so clever, so confident and he couldn’t help but like that about you.

Like.

There it was, the word again and he swallows it down like his pride as he continues on with his lecture, allowing you and Tim to return to your discussion.

But he mulls over the word again when he sits all alone in the lecture hall eating his lunch because you and Tim were “going to grab something together”.

As much as Price hated to admit it, he did miss your presence at lunch. Sure you’d chatter his ear off and leave traces of your lunch all over the desk but Price enjoyed the company.

He enjoyed the fact that someone took interest in his lecture- in him after so many years.

He enjoyed having discussions with you even though you’d question everything he said.

And he enjoyed your company at lunch no matter what else he may say.

Weeks passed without the two of you interacting much.

It was better off this way, Price thinks to himself.

Fantasies, that all it was anyway, repeats it so much to himself so that the next time he sees you sitting in one of the extra chairs, legs propped on his desk and eating away at some poor excuse of lunch you made, he thinks that’s a fantasy as well.

He doesn’t ask about Tim and you don’t say anything so Price proceeds to work through the stack of assignments that had been piling up on his desk while silently allowing himself to enjoy this moment.

But soon enough reality hits him in the face or maybe it was when you randomly mentioned Tim that the damn burst inside of him and the words came flowing out of him.

“You should ask the lad out”

“Huh?” You say, seemingly confused by his choice of words since you’d been complaining about morning lectures just seconds before this.

“Tommy?” He tries again, pushing away from his desk, arms now folded over his chest.

You look at him in confusion before it clicks “Tim”

He nods his head, feeling slight annoyance at hearing the name but tries to not let it show on his face. “You should ask him out”.

“Why do you say that?”

“You seem to like him” Price shrugs, seemingly much less confident as he busies himself with cleaning off the stray crumbs you left on his desk.

“Yeah?” Price doesn’t even notice the smile tugging at the corners of your lips.

“Come on kid I’m old but I’m that not old. It’s obvious that you like him.” He says before dumping the pile of crumbs into the trash can.

“Never said you were,” you say completely ignore the latter statement as you smile at him.

For a second Price freezes in place, heat creeping up his face before he clears his throat and looks away. “Either way you should ask him out,”

“I don’t like him” you say with a shrug, still smiling at the older man.

Price scoffs at that.

“You do an awful job at lying, flirting too,”

“Why do you say so?” You say with a small smile on your face neither denying or confirming his suspicions which leaves him feeling tensed

“Well to start off, you’re spending your free time with some old man when you could be with Tom-Tim right now,”

“What if I want to do that though?”

He only scoffs in response, “you don’t want that,”

“I do, though,” you say, sounding firm as ever and for one second it sounds like you’re talking about something else, something he’s been trying to deny for the past months and the implication leaves him speechless and frozen in place, trying to process what you’d just said.

“Professor Price?”

[unscapedgoat]

I've seen people recently call Ragatha "evil" or "two-faced" due to Episode 4??? I absolutely need to address this

⚠️ CW: Discussion of substance use ⚠️

Like, idk if it's a thing here but I've seen people on Youtube say this exact thing and it drives me INSANE everytime I hear it. I'm a huge Gangle fan, I never talk about it here but I am. She's my favourite character but you absolutely cannot fault Ragatha for everything bad that's happened to Gangle in ep 4.

Let's put the facts first: Ragatha is normally nice, but suddenly in episode 4 she acts mean and people give her shit for her telling Gangle "you know you're kinda annoying like this", so much so that Gangle [allegedly] almost abstracted near the end. She talks shit about Pomni "flirting" with Gummigoo and tells Jax she hates him but doesn't want him to hate her.

First of all, she was squirted with stupid sauce, which may have been an allegory for hard drugs or alcohol. That basically stripped her of any verbal filter she MAY have had, so that already puts her actions into much needed context. She's not conciously telling Gangle that she's less annoying when she's sad, or conciously spouting every mean thing about literally everyone she sees. From what I see, she's highly unhappy with her situation and the people around her... you know. Like a REAL human being. Her actions were not hers, it's literally like calling me a bad driver because I crashed the car for drunk driving. No. Should I have crashed the car? Obviously not? But it wasn't ONLY my fault that the alcohol toyed with my reaction speed. [not extracted from experience the last time i drove was during my driving exam]

Second of all, she is so obviously a people-pleaser. People like to call her two-faced because she acts nice to people but actually secretly is mean. It's made very clear that she's nice to let people like her ["Jax, I hate you, but I don't want you to hate me"] and she desperately craves the validation of being liked ["I wish someone would flirt with me"]. And no, that doesn't make her two-faced. Two-faced is when you try to go behind the back of someone to say something for your own gain. Ragatha's need here is a very human want, which is the want to fit in and be liked.

Third of all, YES she almost got Gangle to abstract but it's not her fault. She didn't KNOW that it would cause Gangle to abstract, and she had no malintent. Also (vaguely gestures to stupid sauce again)

Fourth of all, NOBODY SEEMS TO CARE THAT JAX ALSO PLAYED A PART IN THAT??? I know Jax is Jax and he's an asshat, but he still said Gangle was better liked when she was sad and I've only seen people blame Ragatha for it and rarely Jax.

Lastly it's absurd that Ragatha seems to be getting hated on just for disliking some aspects of people in the Circus [with the exception of Jax], GOD FORBID SOMEONE HAVE HUMAN EMOTIONS.

[gggukniverse]

hot with you | jjk (m)

title: hot with you

pairing: jungkook x trans male!reader

series: cool with you

genre: m , smut , established relationship

summary: months after your top surgery you finally feel more at peace. but now that that issue is out of the way you realize there's one more thing, you would like to have a dick too.

warnings: +18, mentions of a top surgery, use of a strap-on, subby and whiny!jungkook, praise, finger sucking, frotting, handjob, oral (reader receiving) in the forms of face sitting and a blowjob (jungkook sucks the strap 😝), jungkook is naaaaasty, cumplay, facial... technically?, reader's genitalia referred to as p*ssy (like one time), coming untouched, overuse of the petname love because yeah, they are so in love it's disgusting, super self-indulgent i'm sorry.

wordcount: 4.5k

note: hi... this is nasty... i was h*rny and i needed to write it... now i'll go hide. hope u enjoy though !!!

note 2: this is written as a nb person with gender dysphoria !!! i am also aware not everyone's dysphoria works the same way !!! you are valid even if you don't relate to reader's feelings here !!! stay safe and ily !

-

—

-

you stare into the full length mirror. your reflection stares back at you.

you can’t really decide if you like what you see or if you don’t. the sight is something you’ve never seen before. you look different. good. you look good. in fact, you look exactly how you’ve been wanting to look for a long long time. but it’s different.

the scars on your chest fully healed a couple of months ago and you have been feeling better than ever since then. those scars are not the reason why you keep staring into your reflection in the mirror.

“everything alright, love?” jungkook calls out for you from outside. he has been waiting for you in your room for a while.

“yeah!” you quickly reassure him. “i’ll be there in a minute.”

the reason why you’ve kept jungkook waiting for a while is the harness wrapped around your hips and thighs to hold the way too realistic dildo on top of your crotch.

technically, this wasn’t entirely your idea. it was jungkook’s.

the first time it was brought up was a few months into the relationship. he had casually asked you if you had ever used a strap on with any of your past hook ups, you had been a little shocked by the question but said no, it hadn’t really crossed your mind before. jungkook just hummed, shrugged and kept mixing ingredients for the sauce he was preparing for dinner. the topic never came up again but you thought about it for a couple of weeks until it naturally escaped your mind. you liked your sexual dynamic with jungkook and since jungkook liked topping you didn’t really know what a fake dick on your body would do for the both of you.

now you can kind of understand what it can do for you. you don’t have breasts anymore and now you have a dick that stands proud on your crotch. maybe the sight has been throwing you off because you just like it too much.

because yes, the thought of using one had left your mind back then, maybe because most of your gender dysphoria came from your breasts, but since you didn’t have them anymore you often caught yourself wondering what it would feel like to have a dick.

you blurted it out one random evening.

because jungkook has a nice dick. it’s not insanely big to the point where it's painful to take him, but it is big enough that it’s heavy on your hand when you hold it. it also has the perfect girth for you to wrap your hand around it. it’s also so pink, the color a little bit more intense on the tip, even more when you’ve been teasing him for a little. you like playing with him until he’s so hard that it looks like it hurts. he likes it too.

“i would like to have one too.” you whispered, more to yourself than to him. your hand squeezed a little around the base.

“yeah?” jungkook breathed out. you knew he was looking at you, but you kept looking down at his cock in your hand. “you would look fucking hot.”

you perked up at that and the conversation somehow ended up with jungkook coming in your hand and telling you he was gonna take care of everything.

and now you’re here. and jungkook must be getting impatient in your bedroom. but you can’t stop staring.

“hey,” jungkook speaks again. he sounds closer now, he must’ve walked to the closed bathroom door. “we don’t have to do this if you’re not ready.”

“no, no, i just–” you try to find the words. “i want to do this, it’s just… new. it’s intense.”

“hm, i know.”

“just– go back to the bed, i’ll go there now.” you tell him and you hear him hum in response before you catch the slight creak noise of the bed. “i don’t know why i feel so shy.”

“you don’t have to be shy, love, it’s just me.” jungkook replies. “i’ve seen you naked a million times.”

“yeah, but this is different,” you pout and look down at the dick– at your dick. “i feel more naked than ever.”

“do you want me to get naked too?” jungkook asks you and you can’t help but smile because he always tries to make you feel comfortable.

“no, you don’t have to.” you say and finally open the door and walk out.

your boyfriend is sat on the edge of the bed, leaned back on his elbows. his legs are spread and he doesn’t look not one bit ashamed of the tent on his sweatpants. he is so fucking hot.

“holy fuck, love.” he sighs a couple of seconds after checking you out.

“i feel like a piece of meat.” you half complain, half joke and cover your now flushed face with both of your hands.

“hey, don’t hide from me, you look beautiful.” jungkook says, sounding a little more serious now. so you let your hands fall from your face and find he has sat up straight on the bed.

“do you think so?” you ask shyly.

“you know you do, don’t act all humble now.” you snort when he winks at you.

“i feel… weird.”

“weird?” jungkook asks and stretches an arm to offer you his hand. you walk closer to him and blush when you see your dick bouncing a little with each step. jungkook is looking at your face though, a worried expression on his.

“not weird, i just don’t know what to think, i– i don’t–” you try to explain but your head starts to get dizzy when you stand in front of jungkook, right between his spread legs, and your dick is so close to his face.

“can i tell you what i think?” jungkook tells you, his eyes going from yours to your lips, then down to your neck, then your chest to your stomach until it they fall on your dick.

“yeah…” you breath out. your arms hang awkwardly on your sides, you don’t know what to do with your hands.

“i think you are so fucking hot,” jungkook licks his lips as he takes in every detail of your dick. it was his idea to get a realistic one. “you are always hot, but this… fuck, love.” he lets out a breathy chuckle and looks back up at your face.

“you like it that much?” you ask him and he nods. his eyes get so big whenever he looks up at you. he looks adorable, but your cock is so close to his lips, his pouty lips. the image is intoxicating.

one of your hands goes down to hold his jaw, you keep him right there looking up at you and drag your thumb across his lower lip. your other hand goes to your mouth and you do exactly what you’re doing with his lips, you drag your thumb across your lower lip and open your mouth when he opens his. jungkook sucks your thumb into his mouth and you do the same before sliding that hand away from your mouth and down your chest, down your stomach. jungkook follows it with his eyes as his tongue plays with your thumb.

a moan vibrates around your thumb when you wrap your hand around the base of your cock. you don’t even realize you moan at the feeling on your hand until jungkook looks up at you with big eyes.

“love,” he mumbles around your thumb, you slide it out of his mouth and spread his spit over his lips. “can i– can i suck you off?”

if the cock you’re holding was actually attached to your body it would’ve twitched and leaked on your hand.

“yeah,” you nod. “please.”

jungkook’s hands go to rest on the sides of your bare thighs and pulls you just a little bit closer, almost making you trip and fall against him, but jungkook is strong enough to hold you up. he leans closer to you and your hand unconsciously goes to the top of his head, threading your fingers across the soft locks gently. jungkook hums, he likes having his hair played with. then he gives the head of your cock a little lick and you swear you can feel it.

you can’t physically feel it, but something in the back of your brain tells you he’s actually touched you with his tongue. you don’t tear your eyes apart from his mouth on your cock when he starts kissing the tip. he kisses it like he’s making out with it and your hand tugs at his hair unvoluntarily. he moans against your cock at the feeling.

“baby...” you whine when he wraps his lips around your cock and starts to take it inside his mouth. “fuck.”

jungkook hums around it as if it tastes amazing and just takes more of it in. you almost choke on a moan when he starts slowly bobbing his head up and down on it. his eyes stay closed until he suddenly opens them and looks up at you.

“baby.”

you moan again and slide your hand to the back of his head to pull him closer. he ends up gagging and you panic, motioning for him to pull away, but he only sinks down on your cock again to take more.

“just like that, baby…” your legs wobble a little when jungkook slides his hands up to your butt and squeezes your cheeks while he keeps bobbing his head up and down. “so good, you’re doing so fucking good.” you praise as you push his hair back and away from his eyes so he can look at you again.

and fuck, you’re throbbing under your fake cock.

“this feels so good, fuck…” you whine and jungkook finally pulls away from your cock. a string of spit connects the tip with his lips. you’re about to go crazy.

“you taste so good.” he smirks at you as one of his hands starts stroking you, the slide easier thanks to his saliva. he’s made a mess on your cock.

“fuck, jungkook…” you throw your head back for a moment because even if you know he’s just tasting the material of the fake cock that’s the hottest thing you’ve heard. “this is so hot.” you mumble and look back down to him. he’s already too focused on your cock again.

“you’re so big, love,” he says and licks his lips once again. “my boyfriend has such a big cock.”

“kook baby…” you whine as he starts stroking your cock faster.

“want you to cum in my mouth,” jungkook mumbles and your hand unconsciously tugs at his hair again when he opens his mouth and sticks his tongue out like he’s waiting for you to give him your cum. “hm… would you like that?” he chuckles breathlessly.

“jungkook– i– fuck,” you moan when he starts swirling his tongue around your tip. “this feels so– so good… i swear i can feel it.”

“you can?” he perks up. his eyes get a bit bigger.

“i don’t know how to explain it… it’s like– when i look at it my brain makes me believe i can feel it,” you explain completely out of breath because jungkook keeps licking at the length of your cock. “you’re doing so good.”

jungkook just smiles up at you and kisses the tip of your cock cutely.

“wanna make you feel good too.” you say and he hums.

“yeah?”

“yeah, please lay down.”

jungkook does as he’s told, laying down comfortably on the bed before you straddle his hips.

“this is so hot.” jungkook places his hands on the sides of your thighs.

“wanna try something.” you move back a little and hover over his body to be able to tug at the waistband of his sweatpants, pulling them down. your mouth waters when you see his cock spring free, proudly hard and resting on his stomach.

“what do you want to try–? ah…” he gasps when you take his cock in your hand.

“i love your cock.” you mumble, spreading the precum on his tip all over his length.

“hm... love yours too.” jungkook slightly bucks his hips up to fuck into your hand. he’s so hard and heavy on your hand, you would love to feel the weight on your tongue but you want to try something else first.

you sit comfortably on top of his thighs and align your cock with his, pressing them together and trying your best to wrap your hand around both of them. your hands are too small for the two of you though, so you wrap both of your hands around your cocks and stroke them slowly.

“holy shit,” jungkook moans as he looks down at what you’re doing. “that feels so fucking good, love.”

you can feel him throbbing under your palms and his tip keeps leaking precum so you spread it over both of your cocks to make the slide easier.

“feels good?” you hum, taking a look at his face. he looks fucked out already. his pretty face is flushed and sweaty, his bangs sticking to his forehead. you love seeing him like this.

jungkook can be dominant when he wants to be, but you know him well enough to know that he does better being the one who’s taken care of. and you love taking care of him, you love making him feel good and seeing him fall apart like this.

“don’t stop, please.” he begs, and by the trembling of his thighs under your butt you know he’s trying his best not to fuck into your hands.

you look back down at your cocks and you throb under the harness. “our cocks look good together.”

“if you keep talking like that i’m gonna cum.” jungkook warns you with a breathy chuckle and you smile at him.

“gonna cum on my cock, baby?”

“fuck, y/n…” he lets his head fall back on the pillow for a second before looking back down, like he doesn’t want to miss anything. “let me do it.”

you hum and let go of your cocks to let him wrap his hand around them. he can do it with just one hand, it’s still a tight fit when he tries to close his hand around both of them but you know he likes it tight. he starts jerking you both off just a little bit faster than you were doing but still not fast enough to make him cum.

“baby, you’re drooling.” you manage to let out a fond chuckle when you see the spit on the corners of his parted lips and lean closer to wipe it away with your thumb.

the movement of you leaning closer to him pushes your cock forward and a loud moan escapes jungkook’s mouth. “yes! do that again!” he begs and you look down in confusion. “fuck my hand.”

you obey right away, moving your hips forward slowly and watching your cock sliding against his and into his hand. the friction must feel good for jungkook if the uh uh uh’s mean something so you keep fucking your cock into his hand until he’s whimpering.

“love, i’m gonna– ngghh… i’m gonna cum.” he mumbles so you push his hand away from your cocks and just wrap yours around his, jerking him off fast and tight. you want him to cum. the sight of jungkook reaching to wrap his hand around your cock and jerking you off at the same pace makes you moan with him.

“yes baby,” you hum as you start to fuck into his closed fist. jungkook lets out another loud moan when he sees you. “be a good boy and cum for me.”

when jungkook cums he moans louder than you’ve ever heard him moan. you panic just for a second that you will get a noise complaint tomorrow but your worries slowly fade away in the back of your mind as you watch jungkook spilling ropes of cum all over his stomach and chest.

“fuck…” jungkook sighs once he’s stopped coming. you can tell he’s spent by the amount of cum on his torso. “that was so good.”

“yeah, i can see,” you cup his face with one hand and lean down to give him a kiss that he lazily returns. “look at what you did,” you hum and look down at the mess on his torso, he looks down too. “messy boy.” you chuckle, leaving a kiss on his cheek before sliding your hand down to his chest. you get a bit of his cum on your fingers and bring it to your mouth.

“love,” he looks at you with hooded eyes as you moan around your fingers. “you’re gonna get me hard again.”

you sit up straight again and press your cock to his softening one laying on his stomach. “would that be so bad?” you hum and get some more of his cum there to spread it over your own. his cock visibly twitches but you ignore it, you just pick up more of his cum and coat your cock with it, looking at it in awe.

“shit…” jungkook curses under his breath.

“i like this,” you mumble. “i wish i could cum like you. i would feed it all to you,” you say as you pick up the last drops of his cum to pour it on your cock before you start stroking it. you can hear jungkook moan at the sight but you keep looking down at your cock, too hypnotized with how it looks. “you would take it, right?”

“yes.” jungkook breathes out instantly.

“of course you would,” you smile to yourself as you watch your fist swallow your slick cock. “my good boy would take it all in.”

“all of it,” jungkook says and gets a hold of your hips again. “fuck into your fist, love.” he says as he moves your hips forward.

you bite your lip in concentration as you stop moving your fist and start to move your hips instead, watching your cock fuck into your fist. jungkook’s cum is getting a little dry around your cock so you spit on it to make the slide easier, not missing jungkook’s groan.

“is this how you would like me to fuck your mouth?” you ask jungkook and finally look up at his face. he looks even more fucked out than before. “you want me to fuck your mouth until i’m coming down your throat, baby?” you keep fucking into your fist, slow but steady.

“yes!” jungkook nods anxiously, his messy long hair beautifully splayed on the pillow around him like a halo. he’s so pretty.

“hm?” you run your tongue across your lower lip as you lean down to hover over him again, one hand next to jungkook’s head supporting your body. “i think i would like to cum on your face though.” you tilt your head as you look down at him, taking in every single detail of his face, wondering how he would look with your cum all over it.

“please…”

"you want it?” you hum as you stroke your cock faster.

“yes! yes, please, i want your cum.” jungkook whines and only then you notice the slight creaking sound of the bed and the sight of his bicep flexing. you are pleasantly surprised when you look down and find him stroking his hard cock. he got hard again just watching you.

“are you insatiable or what?” you tease him, a little bit condescending.

“you’re so hot,” he mumbles. “wanna make you cum.”

“yeah?”

“mhm… all over my face.” jungkook hums. you can see a drop of sweat down his temple.

“baby,” you sit up again because your arm is about to give out. “i’m so wet, fuck… you don’t– you don’t understand, i need to cum.” you look down at your cock and whine desperately because no matter how hard or fast you stroke yourself you can’t cum.

“come sit on my face.” jungkook taps the side of your thigh.

you don’t even think twice before starting to clumsily take the harness off your body. you don’t even have time to be embarrassed about the mess you made right on the harness before tossing it away, throwing it somewhere across the room.

“come here,” jungkook tugs at your hips to make you move forward. “please, want to make you cum.”

you crawl on top of him until you’re on your knees on top of his face and he doesn’t really give you any time to prepare before he’s using all his strength to pull you down on his face with both hands.

“fuck!” you scream when he starts eating you out like a starved man. “jungkook… fuck…” your thighs tremble with your weight and you bring one hand to jungkook’s hair, tugging at it a little.

“so wet for me,” jungkook mumbles when he pulls away for a moment. “you’re fucking dripping on my face.” he chuckles and dives in again, lapping at your entrance as he rubs his nose against your clit.

“oh my– ah, fuck…”

jungkook smacks one of your asscheeks with his hand, pulling another loud moan out of your mouth. you start grinding against his face, throwing your head back while jungkook hums like you taste deliciously. his hands on your ass push you to grind harder against his face and it feels so good you have to support yourself with both hands on the headboard of the bed not to collapse.

“baby… jungkook, baby… i’m so close…” you whimper and look down to find jungkook already looking up at you with half-lidded eyes. “you’re doing so good, gonna make me cum,” you bring one of your hands back down to his hair, pushing a couple of strands away from his eyes. “want that? want me to cum on your face?”

jungkook’s eyes roll back and you can both hear and feel a muffled response against your entrance. he nods, the movement makes the tip of his nose rub against your clit again.

“gonna cum… gonna make a mess on your face.” you tug at his hair and the moan he lets out gives you the vibration you needed to finally come undone.

your whole body twitches with your orgasm and you hold on tight to the headboard not to fall down, even if jungkook’s hold on you is enough to keep you up. you ride your orgasm grinding against his mouth but jungkook just dives in further, using all of his strength to make you grind all over his face.

“jungkook!” you whine and twitch in oversensitivity as he nuzzles against your pussy like he’s desperate for it.

the sight is so nasty. jungkook’s face is a glistening mess with your orgasm all over it but he looks drunk on it. he only stops nuzzling against you when you tug at his hair a little too hard and beg him to stop because you’re too sensitive. he pulls away with a choked moan and a shiver.

your eyes widen in realization. as you take a look back over your shoulder you see the mess he’s made on his stomach. again. he came completely untouched.

“jungkook?” you get up on your knees, supporting your body with your hands on the headboard to look down at him.

“sorry… fuck… i don’t know what came over me.” jungkook mumbles as he tries to catch his breath. his face is all wet and he looks like he’s having the time of his life. he honestly looks drunk.

“you are so nasty,” you manage to chuckle and he only smirks, his eyes still closed as he pants. “we should go take a shower.”

you step back on your knees until you’re straddling his lap to lean down and kiss him. you taste yourself on his lips, jungkook just lets himself be kissed and you pull away with a giggle.

“you’re really exhausted, huh?” you tease.

“i am,” jungkook pouts cutely like his face is not covered in your arousal. “i don’t want to get up.”

“i’ll help you.” you finally get up from the bed and offer him a hand that he lazily accepts. you pull from him and easily get him to get up. the last few months working out with him are paying off.

“hey," he says once you two enter the shower. "did you like it?"

"yeah," you smile and nod, he smiles too. "i liked it a lot, thank you for doing this with me."

"thank you for trusting me." jungkook responds and you kiss him.

you wash each other's hair and share a ridiculous amount of kisses before walking out of the shower. you then grab some comfortable clothes and go make something for dinner. jungkook doesn’t leave your side, backhugging you while you walk around the kitchen and saying “i’m here to give you kisses” when you call him out for not helping you with dinner. you laugh and reach behind with your hand to slap his ass playfully.

“i want you to fuck me next time.”

you choke on a piece of meat when you hear jungkook blurt those words out like nothing during dinner.

“what?" you cough and reach for your glass of water to drink a little and ease your throat from the coughing. he looks at you with an amused smile.

because you’ve talked about this before. a couple of months after you started seeing each other he told you he had bottomed before and that it wasn’t really his thing. he liked topping, period. and you liked him topping. so the thought of him bottoming had never really crossed your mind.

until now.

you think back to how nice he looked panting under you when you stroked your cocks together, how much he looks to be taken care of. it wouldn’t be so bad to top him.

“i don’t know… we could try it out, if you want to.” jungkook shrugs and keeps eating.

“but i thought bottoming wasn’t your thing.” you say quietly.

“to be honest, i didn’t have good partners when i did it.”

something in your stomach twists. “oh, jungkook–”

“no, don’t worry, it’s not like that,” jungkook quickly cuts you off. “i just… i guess they didn’t know how to make me feel good, but you always make me feel good.” he gives you a blinding smile that you can’t help but return.

“i’ll make you feel good.” you nod and he giggles before diving back into the food.

you finish dinner and decide to have a couple of wine glasses since neither of you work tomorrow. you then throw a giggly and tipsy jungkook over your shoulder and carry him to bed. he mumbles something about you being so hot and then falls asleep curled up against your side.

-

—

-

a/n: i hope you enjoyed this :) i will try to continue this story because i hold it really close to my heart and i love them both a lot <3 thank u for reading

[hammed-burger08]

| Selcouth | Chapter two: Gabriel |

Platonic! Yandere! Alien x reader

Warnings: Yandere behavior, violence, death

Summary: While recovering a space capsule your astronaut team discovers an intelligent life form that seems to be a little too attached to you.

Word count: 2,032

Chapters: | one | two | three | four |

A/n: I hope you guys enjoy this chapter! Thank you for reading <3

~

“Data log: entry number 3,

I will now begin to conduct different tests on this creature. First, I will attempt to feed it plants." You take hold of the tongs to your right and tear a piece of kale off. Slowly you begin to lift the glass covering of the creature's enclosure. Placing the kale into its space, you begin to observe any movements that the creature makes.

"The creature seemed to be indifferent toward the plant, I will now begin testing live feeding." You glance over to the mouse that you have.

"Sorry mouse, your death won't be in vain." You gently lift the mouse from its tank and place it with the creature, quickly shutting the lid. With a curious glint in your eyes, you begin to observe its eating habits.

The first thing you notice is how the creature seems to open up—as if it's blooming. Slowly the appendages sprouting from the center wrap around the mouse, each movement slow and meticulous. Once the appendage is completely wrapped around the middle of the mouse, the creature fully blossoms. White glowing ethereal light floods your vision and as if you were in a trance, you cannot look away. The mouse squeals as its body is being melted. With no blood being congealed, everything flows from the mouse into the center of the creature's flower. A buzzing feeling takes over your mind, and you are completely unable to think. All you can do now is just observe.

The mouse is no longer struggling; it's become paralyzed. You feel like the mouse, trapped in your own head, unable to move or make a sound. Strangely, you don't feel any panic; your will to fight is completely taken over. It was only when the creature finished that you came back to your senses. Thank god for the camera recording.

Turning toward your monitor, you watch the video of the feeding. After taking down notes, you proceed to finish your data log, shaking a little as you do.

"The closed lily shape on the creature opens to what seems to be a flower shape. Each of the 'petals' on the creature has razor-sharp, shark-like teeth. On the end of each 'petal' there are hooked teeth that attach to its prey. The center of the flower has a circle of teeth with a glowing center. In fact, it seems as though there is a smaller flower inside of the middle containing a glowing—almost blinding—light. I have deduced that this light may have hypnotic abilities. When feeding, the creature seems to completely wrap around its prey, secreting paralytic venom and venom that completely melts the prey. The creature then sucks the blood and meat from the prey like a vacuum." Ending your data log, you turn towards the creature, It’s completely closed now.

"…" You have no idea how to feel about this. It's amazing what the capabilities of the creature are; however, the hypnosis poses a serious threat. Deciding to stop thinking about it, you walk out of the capsule, triple-checking the locks.

Walking into the common area, you spot David. Quickly running up to him you began to excitingly tell him your discoveries.

"Oh my God, David, that creature is insane. I mean, the way it feeds on animals, holy shit. It literally melts flesh, do you know how crazy that is?? I also am beginning to believe it can hypnotize—"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, slow down. What do you mean by melt flesh?" David, extremely concerned, cuts your insane rambling short with a very valid question.

"Is that thing even safe to have on board?" He seems to be full of valid questions actually.

"It's literally sealed; we'll be fine. Anyway, to answer your question, it literally made it so that the mouse couldn't congeal its own blood. It effectively just turned the mouse into soup." David gives you the craziest look in existence. If he were to strain his eye any more to the side, you think it would go to the back of his head.

"Um…" David says, scrunching his eyebrows even further.

"Cool, right?" you reply with a goofy smile planted on your face.

"If by cool you mean terrifying, then yes, very cool," David says, giving a nervous laugh.

"What are you two talking about?" Whipping your head over, you see Isla walking into the common room, giving you a scrutinizing look.

"Our Researcher made some new discoveries on the resident alien." Poor, sweet David is the one who has to speak up to the witch.

"Gross, please refrain from talking about that thing in my vicinity," Isla says, then walks out of the shared common room, bumping into your shoulder while doing so.

"Who pissed in her cereal?" you mutter before turning back to face David.

"So, are ya gonna name it?" David asks, giving you a curious look. You've thought about naming it before because saying the word 'creature' over and over again has been getting old. So, you already have a pretty good namein mind.

"Yeah, I was thinking about the name Gabriel." The main reason for this was how the creature looked; its white glowing light and flowing beauty gave it the attributes of an angel. So, it was only right that you named it after one.

"Odd name for an alien space thing, but okay," David says, getting up from his seat.

"Anyway, I'm going to go hit the hay. See ya later, girly." David turns and walks to his part of the living quarters.

"Goodnight, David," you yell out.

You make your way into your living quarters placing your recording device on your bedside table. Slowly you began to drift off into sleep.

You awake in a panic, loud alarms pierce your eardrums. Quickly you cover your ears.

"What's going on…" you say, not even being able to hear yourself over the alarms. Hell, you can't even hear your own thoughts over the alarms. In a hurry, you rush over to the capsule; you have a suspicion that's where the alarms originated from.

"What happened?" You yell over the alarms. To your right, you see Isla disabling them with David right next to her. The tank that held Gabriel looks wrong, almost.

"I have no idea. I walked in here to see Isla tampering with things," David replies after helping Isla shut off the alarm system.

"Isla, what did you do?" you ask, not trying to sound accusatory.

"I… I don't know. All I remember is that I was walking around the station until I saw that thing. There was blinding white light and now I'm here." You feel bad for her; the hypnosis that Gabriel can induce is no joke. You give her an empathetic look.

"When I walked in here, she looked pretty out of it, almost like a zombie," David says, backing up her words.

"I knew this could happen, but I never thought it could be this strong…"

"What?" David says, eyeing you.

"Remember last night when we were talking about how Gabriel feeds?"

"You named it??" Isla loudly exclaims, looking disgusted.

"Yeah," David replies to you, ignoring Isla's words.

"Gabriel is able to hypnotize its prey," you try to explain.

"You mean it was trying to eat Isla?" David asks, looking horrified. Gabriel trying to hypnotize Isla for food is probably not the best conclusion, but it could be one.

"Maybe," you reply.

"Maybe?? Fucking maybe?? My life could be in jeopardy and all you can muster up is a maybe?" Isla says, screaming at you, getting closer to your face.

"Isla, none of us know anything about Gabriel—" you try to explain.

"Stop fucking calling that thing Gabriel!" Isla spits out, shoving you as she does so. Regaining your composure, you try to explain to Isla that eating her was most likely not the reason.

"None of us know anything about it. So, there could be a chance that it wasn't trying to eat you but rather trying to escape. Look, you are much larger than Gabriel, so most likely it won't see you as prey." At this point, your breathing is heavy and your fists are balled.

"So let's just calm down and get you checked up," you say with a strained smile, trying your best to keep a calm demeanor.

"I don't need to be checked up on by someone like you." Isla walks out of the room, once again bumping into your shoulder—it seems to be a new favorite thing for her to do.

Okay.

Ouch.

For once in a very long time, Isla's comment dug deep. You took immense pride in your schooling and your ability to help, so for her to just blatantly tell you she doesn't want your help actually made you feel some type of way.

You shake your head, now that she’s gone you can check up on Gabriel.

"You probably want to leave and lock the door while I'm doing this," you tell David. He nods, walks out of the room, making sure to shut and lock the door.

Walking over to Gabriel's enclosure, you see that the lid is slightly off. When Isla was under the trance, she must have opened the lid before snapping out of it when the alarms turned on. You take a mouse out of its tank to test whether or not Gabriel is hurt.

The mouse goes up to Gabriel, nudging it a little before wandering around the enclosure. Something must be wrong. You take a long probe tool and poke at one of Gabriel's appendages; nothing happens. You deduce that the high concentration of oxygen in the air must have shocked Gabriel's senses. Before, when you were feeding him in a controlled environment, you made sure that the air and pressure were as close as possible to how it would be on Grannus. That was not the case when Isla opened the glass.

With your head lying low, you continue to observe Gabriel. Suddenly, Gabriel begins to move. One of the appendages on it curls ever so slightly, as if Gabriel is beckoning you to come closer. And closer you go.

With your face pressed up against the glass, you watch the flower structure on Gabriel open once again. Quickly, you look away. Seemingly annoyed by this, Gabriel hits one of its appendages against the glass. Jumping a little, you turn your head away and leave the capsule.

Triple-checking the locks, you move towards your monitor. You watch as a feed of Gabriel is displayed. Honestly, you feel really bad for Gabriel; the poor thing didn't ask to be tested on or to be in a glass box. Deciding to turn off the feed, you head back to your room.

This was your first mistake.

David got a little too curious and decided to check out Gabriel on his own. Seeing that you were asleep, he crept into the capsule. Immediately, he turned his head to Gabriel. The flower on it was closed, so David didn't feel threatened. However, that quickly changed. The flower opened with such rapidness that David couldn't do anything to fight off the hypnosis. It was over.

Earlier that night, when David and Isla were turning off the alarm system, it caused it to stop working. So, there was nothing to pull David back out.

With a reaching hand, David slowly pulled the glass casing off. Shakily, David's hand scooped up Gabriel, bringing Gabriel right up to his face. Gabriel's appendages wrapped around David's wrist and hand. Gradually, an appendage reached for David's neck. Wrapping around David's neck, Gabriel crawled up until it was attached to the back of David's head. Gabriel then sunk every single one of its teeth into David.

David could feel his consciousness fading away. He was no longer himself; every thought, dream, or aspiration he ever had melted away. All David was now was a host, a puppet for Gabriel.

The only feature of Gabriel you didn't catch was how he had the ability to take control over a host. When Gabriel sunk his teeth into David, he released enough venom to completely melt David's brain, effectively taking David over.

[m1ssunderstanding]

Understanding Lennon McCartney Rewatch Part 1.3

Okay can anyone explain the “false hotel registration” thing to me? Does it mean they registered under a false name? So Paul registered under a false name so he could go fuck a girl in his room without getting in trouble with the press? I'm confused. Didn't they bring girls to their rooms all the time without getting in trouble? It doesn't make sense. Why did he feel the need to register under a different name?

Paul, talking about American conservatism, “So many organizations over here that are nuts anyway.” John, “Yeah, they're so far right they just–” tape ends. They really were brave, though. To say what they thought and risk losing what they'd only just got. I wonder who cut the recording. 

Journalist: Paul, are you planning to marry Jane Asher? John: scream ‘no.’ Go on. Lol John certainly says what he feels doesn't he?

Paul making fun of the racist question. Good job bud. 

The whole “Yesterday” thing is crazy. Like, what a feat, first of all. I think we forget how unbelievably successful the song was.

Second of all, I know John's reaction was childish and mean, but his feelings were valid if you just look at the treatment and reception of “Ticket to Ride”  (John's dead mum song). Like objectively yesterday is a better song, but still.

Oh, John. Poor thing. 

If “Girl” is secretly about Paul . . . yeesh. It's so obsessive and adoring and simultaneously so disappointed and disparaging. John always has such impossible standards for Paul. “She promises the earth to me and I believe her, after all this time I don't know why.” Um… maybe because he literally did give you the world? At so many points I find myself asking, “what more could Paul possibly have given John?”

People always take this quote as a sexuality thing, but couldn't it also be a conscience thing? Revulsion at taking advantage of the fact that all these women are fans? At the scale of his infidelity? I don't know, am I giving him too much credit?

The thing about Paul, John – and though it drives you insane, it's a big factor in why you love him -- is he's not going to be bullied into anything. If he decides to take LSD it's going to be on his own terms. And I know you think it'll bring you two closer, and you're right, but peer pressure just doesn't work on him. There's no point. You know that.

I LOVE Paul and the Indica. Designing the wrapping paper in secret up in his little attic room, covering over the shop windows so he can do his handyman work building shelves and painting in peace. It's Linda's Paul pre Linda, you know?

John is so good at PR as in making something sound as beautiful and important and powerful as possible. Which is something Paul absolutely relied on John to do and clearly could not do on his own after the break up. Look how John makes them almost into prophets here.

"I really wanted to live in London but I wouldn't risk it." Another thing to make John envious of Paul and resentful of Cynthia. I really wish those two had just never got married. 

“I don't object to people having a lot of money, I never did. But I do object to people being stony broke and starving.” RIP John, you would've loved the American “left” of today. But you can't have the former without the latter, sorry.

This picture always gets me. It's ridiculous. Pattie and George. Mo and Ringo. John and Paul. With Cynthia awkwardly by herself. It's funny. It's adorable. It's crushing. And with that quote? It's impossible.

I think Tara Browne is overlooked. Paul brought him home for Christmas. That's a big deal. And John hated him enough to laugh when he read about his death. That's also a big deal. Paul and his messed up social climbing obsession. I do think it's worth pointing out, though, the difference between Paul’s LSD trip with Tara and his trip with John. More on that later.

I really do think they were all staunchly anti-racist for their time, you know, besides John's racist jokes and drawings… but Paul particularly. And I have to wonder where that came from. Did he have empathy for people being judged on appearance and background? Was it partially due to his idolization of black artists? Did Little Richard maybe say something to him about racism in America? Anyone have any thoughts?

Actually, same, John. 

Okay and I have to share my hot take on the whole Jesus scandal. It's this: the American right doesn't actually care about Jesus. They care about protecting their hegemony. They didn't like that the Beatles were openly and stubbornly integrationist. They didn't like Paul's comment about their inhumane racism. But they couldn't openly counter that without showing their hand. So they used the Jesus comment as an excuse. If they play the religious persecution card, they get to paint themselves as the victims and therefore the good guys while they take down anyone who challenges the status quo that keeps them in money and power (aka the Beatles). 

Maybe I should've had a “poor baby” tally because the number of times I've said that about John in these comments has got to be tally-worthy. I would've driven around in a gorilla suit with you, honey!

It is actually amazing that there hasn't been more speculation on Paul's sexuality with all these serious boyfriends. 

Paul tells a story about a time he flew a plane, and how much better he liked it than being a passenger. First off. Imagine being a pilot and just being like “oh, you've never touched a joystick in your life, but you're Paul McCartney? Sure, go ahead. Fly the plane.” But also. His control issues and his confidence are both off unreal. No one in their right mind would feel more safe flying a plane – as someone with a complete lack of experience – than when a licensed pilot is flying it. 

Okay I literally JUST learned that Here There and Everywhere says, “how good it can be” not could. Can. And it's one of those in my "for sure this was about John" folder. Okay then. Wow.

The thing is they really did compliment each other's songs a lot more than modern Paul makes it seem like. So I wonder what it was about the “Here There and Everywhere” compliment that made it so special to Paul?

This footage where John is hiding behind McCharmley. I love protective Paul and how different he is to protective John and how much they needed each other. 

Hall of Fame quote: “what composer do you respect the most?” “I dunno really. John Lennon.” “Paul McCartney.”

[inchidentally]

"short and easier to read" babe I am so sorry to you and everyone else for how my insane posts come out - it's why I link to so much stuff bc it is a struggleee for me to not write just run-on sentences ;__; but I do get what you mean and I promise I tried my best - it's def shorter than the og and in smaller bites if that helps ??

(I actually wrote this on someone else's laptop so it's got proper punctuation and capitalization and everything!)

For those who don’t know: Oscar is an acts of service guy Lando is a words of affirmation guy. Let’s remember that someone’s love language is how they choose to express themselves, not what they should demand of others!

Oscar is also very much not a PR guy, for anyone totally oblivious to the obvious (and that all his "greatest hits" in PR were done unintentionally or bc he's awkward or bc his mom is cooler than him). For example, Oscar brings up his girlfriend of 4-5 years a fair amount but it’s almost hilariously not gushy or romantic (having a “cuddle” is as far as it goes lasfgjlsagfl). But he’s said himself that for the most part he’d prefer not to have too much private life available to the public. *His downtime with Lando joins in with all his other social life in being extremely limited to the public. 

The “thanking the sponsors” thing is one of Oscar’s safe, approved speeches he pulled from Andrea so that Oscar doesn’t have to do spontaneous on-camera speaking. Sorry but not all of us are good at it and it’s wayyyy easier to just have some rehearsed pre-approved soundbites. He tends to have a few that he repeats for a while until he updates the list lsafjslafhlafh.

He also very openly struggles to do on-camera speaking and no one knows that better than Lando who’s had to help him a huge amount. 

It does seem to be mostly cameras that make him stressed bc he was fine thanking Lando for his help in Baku at the fan stage in Singapore and overall he can use more of his dry humor when he's speaking to people rather than just to a camera. 

Lando’s recent inclusion of Oscar in his media responses to this degree is a reaction to Hungary and Monza - normally, his post race responses focus on himself and his own performance (which is literally normal and the default for drivers!!). The recent emphasis on teamwork/Oscar is something he feels he needs to do with his own PR work right now. He’s a smart man who’s been doing this a long time, so his reasons are valid no matter what fans think. He’s not sitting there working out or analyzing Oscar’s PR, just his own. 

People are absolutely running away with themselves over Monza and ignoring that apart from that one moment, Oscar is widely popularly seen as the supportive teammate role. To the point where last year and even part of this year, Lando was criticized by a lot of fans for not acknowledging Oscar enough.

Going off of that, let’s show how easy it is to take PR and media to make one of them look bad by turning it around onto Lando (!! this is for an example, I do NOT endorse hating on Lando for any of it !!)

Lando openly disliked being referred to as the “older teammate” and kinda left Oscar to his own devices so much last season that Oscar wouldn’t know where he was going a lot of the time and even semi-joked “my teammate’s abandoned me” (again, reminder this was not a source of drama for anyone but fans). He got called a little duckling a lot bc he’d tail Lando closely so as not to lose him. In fact it started irking some people that Lando would spend so much time with Carlos or Daniel and not getting to know his new teammate and helping him out with his rookie season of F1 the way Carlos did for Lando.

In every team photo where Lando has had a podium and Oscar has had nothing (and sometimes due at least in part to team orders!) which is very often! the comments sections have always had plenty of ‘Oscar is such a great team player, always happy and showing up for Lando no matter what’. So the whole ‘Oscar doesn’t do enough for Lando’ narrative is extremely recent and at odds with the rest of reality.

Please read the very first part of my enormous full post bc Lando didn’t thank Oscar for his Miami win, he praised his driving.

Even though at Silverstone this year Lando got on the podium and Oscar didn’t, Oscar made the fan stage all about bringing Lando out of his disappointment and even said he did the shoey “to make us feel better” and then dedicated the top row of his IG that week to photos and videos of him and Lando. Special note that this is in no way Oscar’s home race and he was solely seeing it as emotional for Lando and McLaren - and he had zero reason to personally be very happy after that weekend.

I’ve seen Melbourne this year get mentioned in the team orders discussions on my fyps, so that’s a handy example in many ways: Despite Melbourne being Oscar’s literal hometown race - and Lando even filming some Quadrant stuff at Oscar’s childhood karting track where a corner is named after him* - this year Lando didn’t acknowledge Oscar really at all over the weekend until someone mentioned him at the end of the podium press conference. Lando acknowledged that Oscar following team orders made his (Lando’s) drive a bit easier in Melbourne this year but said that he was faster than Oscar and deserved third over him anyway. (Good contrast to Hungary and even Carlos stating that something an undercut due to pit strategy shouldn’t erase one teammate being faster/more dominant in a race in order to give the other teammate the win!) He did PR work with pretty much everyone except Oscar actually, even doing promo for his (Lando’s) dad’s electric scooters on the new dotmov acc. Kind of like him being on a similar PR campaign at Singapore this year because of a sneak preview of Quadrant rebranding and announcing the Landostand at Silverstone  - he went for the biggest PR hits and posted Daniel on his jpg account, did a golf day with Carlos and Max F and was more active on socials than he had been for months. All while only having Oscar in one photo out of the whole weekend’s carousel despite the McLaren double podium. You could even read into him cutting Oscar and Oscar’s trophy out of two of the shots if you wanted! (He did include Oscar in the big group photo after the podium celebrations.)

*I saw some ppl say he didn't include Oscar in the Melbourne karting filming bc McLaren doesn't cross over with Quadrant, which isn't true. Zak has shares in Quadrant and Bianca has been included in the Quadrant rebranding launch with Lando's Singapore helmet design.

See how easy that was to flip it around?? If you’re even slightly biased against a driver or never see flaws in another- or are dying for two teammates to hate each other - then confirmation bias will always find plenty of “evidence”! Because the reality is that after the Austin GP, Lando found his “older teammate” mode and began helping Oscar out with his rookie year. In Melbourne, Lando spent his first day filming for his .mov account including the Oscar jersey and merch he came across - and Oscar mentioned how he and Lando talked about Lando filming at his old track. (Again, not PR coordinated or filmed, just mentioned!) And that after the Singapore race this year, they beamed at each other every other second of that night, filmed a deliriously happy post race video and joked in the cool down room - I honestly doubt have even noticed yet what the other has posted to IG salfhsalfafa. All of the negativity fans are coming up with is their own personal spin and does not resemble how Lando and Oscar are behaving to or speaking about each other.

They base their relationship on their conversations and interactions solely away from the public and the cameras and don’t do any inflammatory commentary about each other. They bragged about the door in the team hub that separates their drivers rooms from everyone else and leaves them open only to each other. Their communications only matter to each other when in private.

Segueing on from that: media and social media are literally PR. Lando is extremely skilled at it now and Oscar is not at all naturally skilled and is still learning. Lando is quick to be able to adapt his media responses, Oscar is not and often sounds stilted and uncomfortable. But it still has nothing to do with how they think of each other and talk to each other personally.

And “Landoscar” has never had the typical PR bromance aspect that we all love in other teammates, and it never will. Lando and Oscar mention but don’t broadcast or package their downtime together and they don’t share their private dynamic with fans or the media apart from the glimpses we see in more relaxed content. It’s just their choice! And just like it doesn’t mean Lando and Oscar are less friends because they don’t PR their relationship, it doesn’t mean the friendships who do utilize PR are less friends! 

And tbh that’s a good note to leave on: that seeing two drivers with no PR to gain from openly liking and respecting each other should mean that we as fans place less importance on the PR responses they give to media and put on social media. So many people want them to hate each other (Netflix even begging them outright) and rivalries get far more headlines and fan engagement, that if these two didn’t like each other or even were blah about each other, they wouldn’t waste time trying to fake it (side note ppl actually thought this joke was deadly serious for a short while). F1 isn’t team sports, no one really cares if drivers or teams appear “friendly” unless they’re desperate for money/engagement to keep them afloat (even there, Alpine prove it clearly isn’t a priority to have friendly teammates when you’re lower down the grid!)

There is absolutely nothing to be gained for them in faking the smiles and laughter and twinning. Equally there’s nothing to be gained by us as fans in judging them and their relationship based on their PR responses and PR work. Lando beams and smiles the same at Oscar after all of Oscar’s awkward, stiff debrief speeches and I kind of want one of these crazy stans to say to him that Oscar is a bad team player and doesn’t show Lando enough appreciation just to watch what his adorable face does in response (don’t do that I’m joking).

[olderthannetfic]

https://www.tumblr.com/olderthannetfic/767420735500271616/so-the-thing-with-content-is-that-is-literally?source=share

The thing that makes the jellyfish hat content is that it is an object containing paper mache, fabric, cardboard, and the assorted accoutrements of jellyfish hat-making (the optional but popular add-ons go listed here in your head).

and implies that the container is more relevant in this specific context than the thing contained

No. that's not an implication. That's a thing you're making up in order to have an excuse to get angry about someone using a word you don't like, but it's not true. If I say, "I dumped open the contents of the box onto the floor", it is very easily discerned by most readers I am looking for something specific that is within the contents of that box. It is insanity to insist that the word content = the container being the most important thing on Earth. If I write "he opened the small box, revealing its' content: a single, small wedding ring" and you think the box is the focus, I just flat-out don't know what to tell you.

Setting that aside: holy shit, please calm down. I'm a bit busy with organizing resources for my local trans community at the moment but I promise you, there are worse problems than someone using a word you don't like. There was an election this year - don't know if you noticed - that impacts real people. Looking at all your anon and off-anon replies, the thing I keep thinking is, "Holy shit, who fucking cares? There are actual issues going on in the world right now!"

The fact that something I sent in during a ten minute snack break at work and quickly forgot about lives rent-free in your head to this degree days after it was said is highly, highly concerning. I cannot convey enough to you how much I did not mean to set off an episode in you, and at the same time, I am also very genuine when I say this may be a hill you're willing to die on, but it's not a hill I'm willing to kill you on. I kill people on important hills and jellyfish hats ain't it, chief.

It's wild to spend my time IRL trying to help people figure out what to do if our state makes it illegal for them to get HRT in-state and then pull up my phone and see someone this pressed about the word "content". Surely your life also has an important issue you could spend time on? No one is having a particularly good time right now. Maybe focus on a thing with literally any relevance to your quality of life whatsoever? I know that sounds glib. However, having had manic episodes where one thing someone said to me sent me over the edge, I'm not being glib. I really mean it when I say that redirecting your focus onto something important helps snap you out of it. It's how I got myself out of it before I was able to get medicated for my Bipolar Disorder. I take zero joy in seeing someone forth at the mouth because one person said one word and that made them spiral. I really do apologize, and I can see that this panic is a very real, valid emotion on your end. But 'valid' here is used only in the sense of 'I believe you when you say you feel panicked', not 'the panic is a logical, proportionate response to the trigger'. (As a side note, after this many anon and off-anon messages indicating fixation and extreme emotional overinvestment, I don't want anyone saying I misused the word trigger. This is not a proportionate response to someone using one word you dislike.)

The jellyfish hat contains materials needed to construct a hat. It doesn't need ads or legal agreements in order to contain cardboard, paper mache, etc. You are trying to make a mountain out of a molehill. Likely, you are taking your anger at something that actually matters and redirecting it onto this, a thing that does not matter. I'm not saying that in judgment - we all do it - but I am not going to be replying to this further. You may have a desire to use other people's words as an excuse to spiral but you'll have to find someone else to use the reason you're losing your shit.

The hat contains the materials needed to construct a hat. It's not that deep.

--