#I ADORE ALLY

[shatcey]

3 day left

The developers gave us a HUGE clue about his true identity by giving him a Tarot card.

The hermit

I found many interpretations of this card and stopped on this one. This explains him very accurately. I'll hide it from the one of you who doesn't want spoilers.

From here

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🔝 𝕊𝕋𝔸ℝ𝕋 ℙ𝔸𝔾𝔼 🔝

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[giantkillerjack]

Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".

[plain-text version of this post can be found under the cut]

Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"

And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".

Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.

At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.

So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!

Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!

Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!

Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.

Plain-text version:

Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".

Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"

And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".

Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.

At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.

So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!

P.S. Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!

Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!

Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.

[shatcey]

I don't pretend to know what happened at the time, just sharing my thoughts. Slight spoilers for Alfons and Elbert's routes.

All the people in Elbert's life find him extremely attractive. He is very handsome, sweet and kind… And back then he was such a sad and lonely child. So no wonder they wanted to help. I think the maids and butlers had the best intentions at first. They were very worried about him and tried to comfort him. Maybe it all starts with simple touches… held hands, stroked his hair, sang a lullaby, and so on. But then he didn't stop them, they gradually became more daring and excessive in showing their affection. Their desire to help him turned into a desire to possess him. Obsessive love.

Ally didn't prevent this (and he could have intervened, he was and remains a very cunning boy), because he really thought it would be better for Elbert. He said it himself in the dramatic mad love ending of Elbert's route.

I still don't quite understand why Ally thinks he's partly to blame for Elbert becoming like this. Maybe because he indulged his obsession, allowed him to nurture his greed. Maybe. But… No matter why he thinks that, Ally always makes decisions in Elbert's best interests. It is not so easy to notice, even he himself doesn't consider his actions as kindness, but he does care. Very much so.

I guess no matter which character I start with, I'll always end up praising Ally...

(Slight spoiler for Elbert's route)

Alfons saying that the maids and butlers might have started with good intentions always struck me as odd.

Like, I don't think it's horribly out of character but there was a nagging feeling in my head that there has to be a reason why he's saying this. I assumed it was some sort of weird coping mechanism of, like, trying to see the best in people or something. Or trying to make a joke distract from how dark the topic is. I dunno.

And then today I thought about how usually he tries to help people out in... his own unique way. Obviously, no where NEAR the same thing. They are very different situations and the maids and butlers deserve to go to hell and die a thousand deaths.

But I feel like he has experience with trying to help, having good intentions, only for it to make things worse. Which might be why he says this to Kate, other than the obvious reason that he knows Elbert enough to know that helping might hurt him more.

[stevenrogered]

Good day, Lord Kilmartin. You left quite abruptly the other morning. Well...you had another caller. I hoped I might see you at the opening of Lord Fuller's collection yesterday.

[allyheart707]

@elliwoods So... Pudding wasn't told about Sprout?? So then, he gets a tiny little green Leo and OF COURSE his first thought for a nickname would be... "Sprout"

[ygamiraito]

harlan saying "i like toys :)!" and giggling will now be forever ingrained in my mind

[thisisasundrysideblog]

pov: you're beardsley's dog

[banannabethchase]

Ally fucking Beardsley dropping a fucking "hey girlie" to a talking jaguar of all things in Never Stop Blowing Up shouldn't have been as surprising as it was.

[dayz-ina-daze]

My contribution to pride month on the last day don’t mind that and ALSO my first piece of proper @clangenrising fanart!!

My favorite aspec girlies <33 (with their emotional support tom cheering them on!)

[waterdeep-weavemoss]

i think it's really important to remember that the emperor disabled stelmane. like as a disabled person every playthrough after my first i told that manipulative prick to piss off every chance. i don't give a shit if he was 'only doing it to survive' or if stelmane was a devil worshipper or whatever. my personal experience with disability means that fucker dies on sight in the final fight. i have no empathy and no wish to empathise with the emperor. he is selfish and evil.

[itsslivernotsilver]

i’m still not over this btw LOOK AT HERRR!!!!!!!!!

[shatcey]

6 days left

Just several lines from his cards...

Actually Kate quite often doesn't believe him. The funny thing is… he may often exaggerate, but he rarely lies…

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🔝 𝕊𝕋𝔸ℝ𝕋 ℙ𝔸𝔾𝔼 🔝

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[draw-the-squad-like-this]

Draw your characters like this! (src)

[abyssal-ilk]

posting that sketch yesterday made me remember just how much i love my taashath so i did another doodle <3

[cannibalcreeps]

Gives us the most handsome sweetest funniest Ghoul and barely 7 minute's worth of interactive dialogue 😩😭

The CRUELTY of this game!!!!!

[melit0n]

"Cogito ergo sum; I think therefore I am. I am AM- I AM." dude come on you're built like the ten commandments save some good lines for the rest of us