#How to Understand a Film in English
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
susanhorak · 1 year ago
Text
youtube
#spoken_english #تعلم #learn_english #تعلم_الانجليزية تعليم انجليزي - تعلم الانجليزية من الافلام الامريكية - كيف افهم فيلم بالانجليزي سوف تتعلم اللغة بطريقة حية واقعية تفاعلية من خلال تعلم الانجليزية من الافلام الامريكية بنفس طريقة تعلم الأطفال للغتهم الأم ، عندما تشاهد الفيلم فأنت تقوم بدمج عقلك مع الشخصيات التي تشاهدها والواقع الذي تراقبه ، تعلم الانجليزية من الافلام الامريكية هي الأصل في تعلم أي لغة جديدة. انت تتعلم الكلمات في سياق ، في حوار ونقاش ، في مشهد تمثيلي ، لذلك فسوف تتعلم كيف افهم فيلم بالانجليزي ،، اما طريقة حفظ الكلمات بشكل مجرد ومقطوع عن أي سياق فهو يؤدي إلى تخزين تلك الكلمات في عقلك بشكل منفصل ، ستبقى معزولة ولن تتمكن من استخدماها في الحوار والمحادثة.
لو عجبك الفيديو اعمل مشاركة من اللينك ده تعليم انجليزي - تعلم الانجليزية من الافلام الامريكية - كيف افهم فيلم بالانجليزي https://youtu.be/e7lfyw7FvEk
ليصلك كل جديد اشترك بالقناه http://bit.ly/2HQGd4q
مزيد من الفيديوهات للمتابعة تعليم انجليزي - تعلم الانجليزية من الافلام الامريكية - كيف افهم فيلم بالانجليزي https://youtu.be/e7lfyw7FvEk
كيف اتعلم انجليزي - رد الفعل بالانجليزية - رياكشن بالانجليزي https://youtu.be/qvJKA3cewZY
كيف اتعلم انجليزي - الصفات فى اللغة الانجليزية - الصفات بالانجليزي وضدها https://youtu.be/x7gfkydHh4k
تد��يب اللغة الانجليزية - تعلم اللغة الانجليزية بطلاقة للمبتدئين - تحدث الانجليزية بطلاقة https://youtu.be/-YKWz6Rm1aQ
دورات اللغة الانجليزية - المشاعر باللغة الانجليزية - كيف تكتب احساس بالانجليزي https://youtu.be/zEjxoSPSo9k #مواقع_تعليم_انجليزي #برامج_تعليم_انجليزي #تعلم_اللغة_الانجليزية #تعلم #spoken_english #english_speaking_course_online #spoken_english_in_telugu #نهي_طلبة , Noha Tolba
0 notes
cosmogyros · 25 days ago
Text
Auditory processing issues suck SO HARD. I just spent about 1.5 hours watching the first half hour of a movie on YouTube, because I had so much trouble understanding the dialogue that I kept constantly having to go back and listen again and again and again, look up a transcript of the full film (the transcript contained mistakes, so it wasn't much help), compare and contrast various subtitle files available online, even cup my hands around my ears, etc. Just to figure out what the characters were saying to each other.
And it's not just literally understanding what words they say to each other, oh no. That's only the first step. The next step is figuring out what those characters MEAN when they say certain words. Like when a dude says "You know, I see, like, if we can get successful, it's, like, L-L, man… limos and Learjets," I feel like I'm having a stroke. I have to hit pause and sit there for a sec and ask myself a bunch of questions and do some research online.
Why did he say L-L? Why did he randomly say the initials of the two things he wants? Also, why does he specifically say 'Learjet'? When people dream of having a private jet, don't they normally say 'private jet'? I'd never heard the word Learjet before, so I had to go look it up to try to get more context, but that didn't really help. Is this a music biz reference I don't know? Is this a Canadian reference I don't know? If this happened once or twice during a movie, it would be no problem, but when I'm stopping and going back literally every two minutes, it takes for-fucking-ever to get through the film and my brain is So! Fucking! Exhausted!
I had to stop at about the half-hour mark. I felt like I was about to cry from frustration, so I quit for the night. I'll return to it in a day or two, when I've got a bit more mental energy, and try to work my way through the rest. If I can get through half an hour of film time per day (in an hour or so, however long it takes to get through that much), I can finish the movie in three days of watching. (And this is a movie I really, really WANT to see. I wouldn't waste a moment of my time struggling through it if I didn't care this much about it.)
Anyway. Sometimes when people say they "don't watch movies much", it doesn't necessarily mean they're being elitist snobs or whatever. Sometimes it's just so fucking challenging and exhausting to watch a movie that it leaves me feeling angry at my own body for being a dysfunctional piece of crap. I don't know if this counts as a "disability" and I'm not claiming that label because I don't want to step on any toes, but I have to admit that the mere prospect of watching a film often fills me with dread because it can be so intensely difficult for me (unless I just mentally check out and give up on understanding it completely, which is what I typically do when I'm watching with other people).
#please don't be harsh to me about this y'all :( i just needed to vent#i feel stupid enough already for being so incredibly fucking bad at something as simple as WATCHING A MOVIE#i don't get it? is this an autism thing? or is it an auditory-processing issue only?#tbf it's a mockumentary (hard core logo) and as i said to a friend tonight: that might be part of the problem#i think actors in mockumentaries often don't have an actual script and tend to improvise a lot of their dialogue#which is great for creating really realistic and convincing dialogue#but also often means that sentences trail off or make no sense; words are pronounced weirdly; enunciation is shit; etc.#the actors in this movie are really good in the sense that they're very realistic and it comes across basically like a real documentary#so props to them for that. but jfc. is it just me being shitty at understanding people talking?#or is it that these people do not fucking know how to project and enunciate and open their goddamn mouths when they talk?#and place emphasis in the right place in sentences? AND PRONOUNCE WORDS CORRECTLY FFS???#no i'm not being fair. and i know that. it's not fair of me to blame the actors/characters for my own difficulty understanding them.#but god this is hard for me. kind of ironic that i've studied so many foreign languages and can understand about 10 languages more or less#but i'm almost brought to tears by the challenge of trying to understand what native english speakers are saying in a normal film#there's another line where the transcript says 'as long as we can keep the fuckin' mentals fuckin' together'#but i swear he does not actually say 'mentals'. i listened to that bit so many times!!!#i even sent the link to a friend who confirmed that it didn't sound like 'mentals' to him either. more like 'mantoros' but that's not a wor#anyway i eventually just gave up on that one. i'm done for the night. i need to sleep#might delete this tmrw bc it feels stupid to get this down over literally just trying to watch a movie :( but i had to let off some steam#if anyone has a CORRECT transcript of this movie anywhere (you'll know it's correct if it does NOT include the word 'ryder') pls let me kno#that would help a lot with my future attempts at finishing it. but now i'm going to bed
2 notes · View notes
nostalgia-tblr · 1 year ago
Text
Thor: Ragnarok is the best Thor movie and you can tell because nobody ever tries to make a desperate claim for prestige and reflected quality by calling it "Shakespearean," they just say they enjoyed it and they liked the jokes.
16 notes · View notes
einaudis · 2 years ago
Text
You're mad because Argentina, 1985 lost (I mean, rightfully so? It was an amazing movie, too)... I'm destroyed because Close didn't win :(
18 notes · View notes
turningnumber · 7 months ago
Text
I could write like an entire book apiece talking about every single member of the bundren family (except maybe anse lol sorry anse) like I just remembered cash. Hey what the FUCK
1 note · View note
vanteguccir · 10 months ago
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media
── ୨୧ ! 𝗦𝗟𝗘𝗘𝗣𝗜𝗡𝗚 𝗣𝗥𝗔𝗡𝗞
         𝒄𝒉���𝒊𝒔 𝒔𝒕𝒖𝒓𝒏𝒊𝒐𝒍𝒐 x reader
SUMMARY: Where Nick pranks Chris and Y/N while they are sleeping.
WARNING: None.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: That is my work, I DON'T authorize any plagiarism! | English isn't my first language, so I'm sorry if there's any grammar error.
   ༻✦༺  ༻✧༺ ༻✦༺
Nick walked towards the double bed closest to the hotel room's door, their vlogging camera in his right hand, while his left hand held a bottle of lemonade.
He slowly approached, raising the camera so that the lens caught what was on top of it, or rather, who. Y/N and Chris were still fast asleep, both covered by the fluffy white blanket.
The girl was lying on the left side, that is, closer to Nick. Her head was lying on Chris's right arm, using it as her personal pillow, while the boy's left arm was around her shoulders covered by one of his t-shirts.
The only visible parts of the couple were their heads - which were practically on top of each other - and Chris's bare shoulders and arms that were slightly shivering from the Texas cold. Unfortunately, the room's heater didn't seem to be able to combat the coldness completely.
Nick couldn't see, but he was sure their legs were tangled under the blanket. He joked that when they slept together, they seemed to melt into each other with how close they were.
As the oldest triplet got closer to the bed, the camera was able to capture the small snores that came out of Chris's half-open mouth and the soft sighs that escaped Y/N's nose, both sounding like a lullaby to each other.
Nick pressed his lips into a thin line, trying to contain his laughter as he anticipated the couple's reaction. He loved playing pranks on them both, especially when they were sleeping.
"Chris, do you want a sip? Y/N?" Nick's voice sounded low behind the camera as the lens captured him, raising his left arm, the bottle entering the frame, bringing it closer to the couple's faces.
Chris, being a light sleeper, woke up seconds after. He lifted his head slightly as he tightened his arms around Y/N, pulling her closer - if that was even possible.
That movement woke up Y/N, or almost. The girl opened her eyes slightly, keeping them in a thin line, exhaling through her nose before closing them again, seeming not to register Nick in front of her.
"Hmm?" The questioning sound escaped Chris's throat. He turned his head from side to side slowly, trying to understand what was happening, his messy hair falling into his eyes.
"Do you want a sip? I think Y/N must be thirsty, too." Nick continued, his cheeks turning red from the effort he was doing while trying not to laugh.
"What, Nick?" Chris's voice sounded for the first time, the hoarseness making his words almost intelligible. The sound made Y/N open her eyes again, this time a little wider.
She lifted her hands, which were previously under the blanket, and brought them to Chris' ones in front of her body, intertwining them, shivering at the contact of her hot skin with her boyfriend's cold one. A sound of discomfort left her lips as she finally noticed Nick in front of her, holding what looked like a bottle. She quickly closed her eyes again, feeling too tired for whatever that was that Nick wanted.
"It's lemonade. Do you guys want a sip or not?" Nick prevailed, moving the bottle closer to their faces.
"If you drop that on me... I'll kill you." This time, it was Y/N's voice that sounded, equally hoarse and tired from the previous day's filming with Sam and Colby. She only opened one eye this time, looking at Nick but not really being able to focus on him, her vision blurred by sleep.
"It's lemonade." The standing boy spoke again, letting out a low, almost imperceptible laugh. He knew he would get yelled at when the couple actually woke up.
"Are you fucking stupid?" Chris responded, stretching for a few seconds without letting go of Y/N's hand, pulling her closer against his bare chest and burying his head in the crook of his girl's neck, exhaling the natural scent of her skin.
"Go away, Nick." Y/N spoke again, finally closing her eyes completely with the comfort of her boyfriend's body heat against her own, a happy sigh scaping her mouth.
They both fell asleep again within seconds, as if nothing had happened.
     ༻﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡༺
extra - comments:
"the way they sleep so close together, being all cuddly and everything 🥺"
"Chris and Y/N are such couple goals"
"I've never seen a cozier bed in my life 😫"
"dear Santa Claus ✏️📄"
"I want a boyfriend who cuddle me while we sleep like I'm going to run away at any minute 😭"
"Nick is a real pest LMAO"
"Nick holding himself back from laughing behind the camera 😭"
"Chris and Y/N's sleepy voice 😔"
Tumblr media
3K notes · View notes
cipheramnesia · 2 years ago
Text
I'm stuck on thinking about the person saying, "Why are they shooting at that dog?" during the opening scenes of The Thing. It's a funny story, but I can't help realizing how many modern movie producers think the same way.
The modern producer would watch that sequence and have notes. Put in an explainer, he'd say, and have the Norwegian lines in English or at least subtitled so the audience can understand what's happening. The dog should get hit by a bullet with a close up so we can see it heal, that way the audience really knows what's up! And he'd pat himself on the back for how much better he made it.
I find myself connecting this to movies more and more trying to keep the plot under wraps, so secret even the actors don't know what they're filming! The audience will really be wowed with the surprise of learning what happens in the plot! That's what suspense and mystery are, after all - not knowing a thing and finding it out. Nothing to it.
There's something to it, this new idea that keeping the plot secret is suddenly hugely important while simultaneously insisting everything is always explained. There can't be a moment anyone knows what's happening before paying for the movie, and there cannot be a single second a paying customer is unsure, or even a little worried, by anything the second they've parted with their money. If you pay your shot and punch your ticket you get everything delivered to the base of your brain in a cup of easily digestible slurry.
Anyway, not all movies and all that, but I think a whole bunch of producers are pleased as punch these days at how much better they are at suspense and mystery.
6K notes · View notes
virgobingo · 1 year ago
Text
more insight on miles’ puerto rican heritage for your fics or fanart
- traditional quinceañeras (or as they are often called by puerto ricans quinceañeros) are really not that common anymore, most girls nowadays have pool parties or go on a cruise. if miles were to go to one of his cousins’ 15 birthday party, chances are it would be casual— no big poofy dress (his mom probably had one like that though)
edit: some people disagree on this. depends on how traditional your family and friend group is I guess, as well as which part of the island you’re from. on average, it seems to be a far bigger deal amongst some other latines. in my class in pr only 3 out of approx 30 girls had a big event like that. not a single one of my cousins had a traditional quince either so you could say I’m partly biased bc of my own experiences. i personally just had a big pool party
- plantains are a big part of our diet. also, pr being an island in the caribbean, coconut is in a lot of our desserts. if miles had to pick a favorite fruit I hc he’d pick either one of the two lol also please google our food, our food isn’t actually spicy so much as savory
- we “celebrate” thanksgiving like other americans. it’s about the only time we eat oven roasted turkey. for winter holidays (christmas eve/day, new years eve/day, three kings day/eve) oven roasted pork. chicken might be offered as a second option for people who don’t consume pork for whatever reason
- you’re pretty much taught how to dance as soon as you can walk. most of us have basic rhythms down. chances of miles dancing with his mom or friends at parties? astronomically high.
- the reason why our flag is everywhere, besides pride, is ‘cause it was illegal to own it. look up the gag law that prohibited us from even displaying it at our homes. so it’s actually an awesome detail in these movies
Tumblr media Tumblr media
- this is my opinion/a fun fact but I feel like miles is basically an homage to black and puerto rican (specifically nuyorican) solidarity around the 70s-80s during the creation of hip-hop and rise of graffiti as a form of expression (you can easily read up on this or watch shows like the get down to learn more about this if you’re curious)
- whether you’re “nuyorican” or “from the island” spanglish is common so miles’ mixing english and spanish isn’t odd bc even rio does this as miles points out in the party scene. he isn’t a “no sabo” kid so much as someone with a strong accent. he understands his mom perfectly
- race ≠ ethnicity. there are plenty of black people in and from Puerto Rico, and miles’ pr family in the spiderverse films are designed to be for the most part afro-latine. so I wouldn’t really call him biracial
- the puerto rican day parade wouldn’t be a thing he skips, he’s gifted a special suit for it in a comic run. his puerto rican heritage is important to him!
Tumblr media
4K notes · View notes
denwritesandcries · 2 months ago
Text
Fall(ing for You) – S.C
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
Pairing: sam carpenter x soft goth!reader
Summary: Sam is certain that Tara's new quiet friend may turn out to be Ghostface, unfortunately – or not –, that friend is you.
or, it takes the help of tara and a dog for sam to finally come to her senses.
Word count: 6,0k.
Content: scream 6 but without the killing, r's 23, cursing, wingman tara ft. yr dog, jokes abt r being ghostface, fluff, pining, sam falling first AND harder, silly movie references.
Note: hey guys, It's been a while since I've written for scream but I rewatched it recently and finally got some inspiration again! I describe the reader a little more in this but it won't really affect anything if you choose to ignore it.
English is not my first language.
Tara made a new friend.
Sam still isn't sure exactly, but the only plausible explanation for the way Tara has been acting lately is that her sister met someone interesting enough to keep her attention so that she gave everyone a break from her tantrums and reckless behavior since their new start outside of Woodsboro.
Now, that could be a good thing, it had been months since the kids started college and they were all doing relatively well. Mindy had Anika, Chad had Ethan and also there was Quinn, even though she wasn't very close to anyone. Tara should have someone too.
The problem is that Sam has no idea who this person is. Tara just won't tell her.
You see, Sam understands that she might have been a little too protective of her sister and that this made Tara's behavior become defensive towards her. Her new therapist – after she got rid of that quack – is helping her work through that, okay? But curiosity and worry were eating away at her insides. The curfews, the tasers and pepper sprays, and especially the ID checks were all important to keep them safe, dammit! Mindy and Chad had no problem with it, and it was only after all the appropriate measures were in place that Sam could breathe and let these new people be a part of their lives. Not knowing this so-called friend, let alone who they were, was driving her to the brink of a breakdown.
She was trying to give her some space, probing with subtle questions here and there and the most she got was an eye roll and ‘It’s just a sophomore I met at the film club, haven't you said I should try to be part of something that didn’t involve frat parties?’
Well, at least it wasn’t a boyfriend, given the lack of dreamy sighs, giggles into the phone and late-night escapades. That was good. They already had enough problems to deal with and a new relationship so quickly was the same as asking for a ghostface to go for them again and Sam hadn’t been back in Tara’s life long enough to know how to deal with this part of being a big sister yet.
Sam had understood that she wouldn’t meet this mysterious person for a while, at least until her sister’s tantrum had passed, and between two shitty jobs and trying to keep a structured life being responsible for a bunch of teenagers in the big city, she couldn’t find it in herself to insist on the subject any further and get the risk of causing a fight. She thought it would be forgotten.
Now just imagine Sam's surprise when she came home one night after a long, exhausting shift, expecting to eat the leftover pizza she had hidden in the fridge and fall into a deep sleep, only to be knocked over by an noisy and strange dog with a piece of pizza in its mouth as soon as she opened the apartment door. Her pizza.
“Koda!” Someone called. Someone unfamiliar. It wasn’t just the dog, there was a stranger in her house.
Sam’s hand instinctively moves to reach for the taser hidden in her jacket when a pair of black-clad legs show up in her vision. Does Ghostface work with dogs now? She wonders in confusion for a moment, and has given up on the voice changer?
The only thing stopping her from tasing this potential killer in front of her is the pure bewilderment and Tara’s laughter filling the room.
“Oh my god,” the figure bends down, picking up the dog who turns out to be a very excited puppy, the pizza falling from its mouth and onto her shirt, getting it all over her, “I’m so sorry.”
It’s a girl, a face she’s never seen before, looking completely mortified.
“Hey, Sam,” Tara stops beside her, a barely hidden tone of satisfaction in her voice, “This is my friend. I thought you’d like to meet her.”
It's safe to say that Sam didn't like Tara's new friend at all.
“You didn’t think about telling me you were bringing someone?” Sam exclaimed, rubbing her temples wearily, “Especially that Lydia Deetz project right there? I almost shocked her in the middle of the hallway!”
Quinn shifted from where she was leaning against the counter in the small impromptu meeting and didn’t bother to hold back her laugh, “Nah, I think Tara would fit that role better.”
“Quinn,” Sam groaned exasperatedly.
“If I had told you you would have said no,” Tara shrugged.
“Yes! Because we don’t know her!”
It was quite awkward sitting on the couch in their living room less than five feet away from the kitchen and being able to hear every word spoken as if you weren't right there, with your messy dog ​​happily chewing on the sock on your ankle.
This wasn't the turn you expected your night to take when you decided to accept Tara's sudden invitation for a movie night, visiting her off-campus for the first time since you became friends.
You met her at the start of the school year, the day she showed up for a film club meeting before anyone else arrived, well, anyone except you. She seemed completely lost and suspicious, even though she was clearly struggling not to show it, which made you like her right away.
Getting attention and starting conversations was never really your thing, this whole club thing wasn't either, honestly, but you ended up being one of the last older members to join with most of the others having recently graduated and the responsibility of looking after the new freshmans gradually fell on you. Most of the time you kept to yourself, preferring the behind-the-scenes side of things to participating in the long-winded debates of high school teens obsessed with slashers and making Stab parodies, but you noticed the way Tara seemed desperate for any sense of normalcy beneath her laid-back facade and the whispers of murder that haunted her.
You took what seemed like a rabid kitten under your wing and ended up cornered by the personification of a Doberman because of it. Talk about doing good deeds and stepping out of your comfort zone. What a joke.
Tara’s older sister, Sam, if you got it right, stared at you with narrowed, suspicious eyes – just like Tara when you first approached her – towering over your figure that tried to look smaller than it actually was on the couch, as if she was trying to learn every little hidden detail about you.
“So…” you began hesitantly, wanting to break the awkward silence that had ensued, “you have such a beautiful house.”
“Aren’t you too old to hangout with a freshmen?" Sam cut in coldly, one eyebrow perfectly arched in distrust.
You sighed, this conversation sure started off very well, “I’m 23,” you cleared your throat, “Tara’s in the same club as me, and I’ve just been helping her with some classes I used to take when I first started here.”
You hear Tara’s distinct chuckle, clearly amused by your frustration, which doesn’t help your situation much. What a wonderful friend, indeed.
Sam hummed with fake indifference and the other two housemates watched the exchange intently, eyes darting between you like they were at a tennis match, amused by the sight of Sam trying to intimidate the poor unsuspecting twit that you were.
A great friend, for sure. Ugh, this is why you don’t sponsor obviously troubled kids.
It’s not like Sam Carpenter is really intimidating or scaring you out the way she seems to want to, she has bags under her eyes and a greasy pizza stain on her shirt and you’re a grown woman, for God’s sake! It’s just that it was extremely embarrassing to cause a scene like that, especially with someone who you really wanted to make a good first impression.
Interacting so much socially lately was becoming relatively exhausting and you expected it wouldn't become a thing, as you were feeling a bit overwhelmed by everything. You hoped this would be the last big meeting you had for a while. Tara had told you a lot about her sister, mainly about how it was a pain in the ass to always have someone hovering over her, but it was something you never took seriously because of the way she sounded when she talked about it, too loving for someone who hated the situation so much. No, Sam was important and Tara had insisted that you meet her after doing the same with the twins just a few days ago. You had carefully planned how it would happen, what clothes you would wear and what you would say and now your chance to make things right was ruined, the words seeming to have escaped you in a flash. You were reserved, quiet, small in the midst of so much hustle and bustle, used to watching everything go by from the safety of the shadows. Being a mouse was easy.
“Is that all you have to say?”
Less easy when caged with a lion.
“Look,” you tried again, silently squirming as your pup start sniffing Sam’s combat boots furiously as you stood to pick him up, “I really didn’t want to cause any trouble or misunderstanding, Tara called me earlier while I was walking this little guy and insisted it would be okay if I came over for a movie. I can leave now if you want to, I’m really sorry for… well, all of this.”
You noticed Sam's expression became conflicted, as if she didn't know exactly what to make of you standing in the middle of her living room without showing any threat and wasn't used to people actually listening to her on sight. Still, she wasn't going to give up that easily.
“Great,” Sam nodded, her voice sounding less firm, “go then.” She pointed directly at your dog, now sitting at her feet with its fluffy head tilted to the side in a guiltily innocent manner, “And make sure to take that pizza thief with you.”
(You swear he looked personally offended.)
“What? No!” Tara seemed to realize that her little game could backfire and came out from behind the counter in your defense.
“Tara—”
“Come on, Sam, it's movie night!” She stomped her foot loudly, “I refused the invite to Jason's party for that, we were marathoning all the Texas Chainsaw Massacres!”
You don’t even have to be good at reading people to know that Sam had lost that fight the moment Tara looked at her with pleading eyes, knowing that there was no way to blame her for simply doing what she asked.
That didn’t stop Sam from rolling her eyes and huffing in irritation.
“Fine,” she practically growled, shifting her attention back to you, “But I’m gonna keep an eye on you, so you better not act all smart and keep that fleabag away from me.”
“His name’s Koda.” You pointed out, before softening, “And thank you, I promise I’m not gonna—”
“Shush.”
Sam was sure this was all part of an act of yours, just the first step to infiltrate their lives and pull the rug out like others have done before, because no one in their right mind would sit quietly next to someone who nearly shocked and threatened them in many ways just a few minutes ago.
Especially if that someone is burning holes in your head with their eyes, like she's doing now.
Sam watches shamelessly and intrigued, shooting daggers at your figure as you lean back with Tara babbling enthusiastically between you, your puppy completely knocked out on her lap, oblivious to the sounds of death and fake blood spurting from the TV. She notices the way you effectively ignore her, responding to Tara’s remarks with genuine interest, even if your voice doesn’t match her enthusiasm.
You remained quiet beyond those moments and the tiredness along with your lack of sudden movements made Sam feel secure enough to leave the room and finally take a shower – because along with everything she never saw much fun in these movies like Tara –, warning you that it was better for everyone to finish the night when the movie ended.
(She also forced Quinn to take her place on the couch and promise to scream if anything happened. You didn't comment on that either.)
Sam only falls asleep when she hears the sounds of goodbyes coming from the living room and the door house being closed, finally relaxing after all the interaction, deciding that it was enough. You could have been at her house, but that doesn't mean she would let you come over again.
You come back, because of course Tara doesn’t give a damn about Sam’s warnings about being careful around strangers – incessantly claiming that you’re not a stranger – and there you are at the next game night that Chad insisted on making a tradition.
At least there’s no sign of the shirt-destroying furball this time and there are pizzas smelling good on the kitchen counter.
“‘Sup, Sam!” Chad greeted loudly as she walked through the door, waving excitedly from the couch, “We’re playin’ uno!”
Her eyes landed on you, who waved at her with a small, tight smile, awkwardly sandwiched between Anika and Ethan, the way you stood out among them so comical that Sam suppressed a snort. She decided to join in without much protest, someone responsible still had to watch you, after all.
Sam wouldn’t admit to anyone, absolutely anyone, that she was enjoying the evening, listening to the heated exchanges as everyone got competitive. Strangely, she noticed that you didn’t try to engage much in the conversation, just like the other night, seeming happy to just be there. She thought you had been withdrawn then because of her behavior towards you, but maybe you were just shy.
That made her raise an eyebrow, Tara didn’t usually embrace introverts. Actually, she had always been pretty popular even before Sam left, if she remembered correctly, so this was new. She felt a small piece of curiosity spark inside her instead of more mistrust as she expected and it disconcerted her.
“The whole point of the 7 card is that you're not supposed to talk, man!” Mindy throwing chips at Ethan interrupted Sam's flow of thoughts.
“This rule is stupid! The manual doesn't even mention it, read it for yourself!” Ethan shuffled the cards wildly – ​​everyone at the table had seen his hand – pointing, “And you’re talking too!”
“Whatever! Nobody reads the fuckin manual to play uno, Ethan!”
Tara groaned, “Guys, just shut up and everybody buys a card.”
“But that’s not how you play!”
She decided to abandon the game and all the fuss in favor of getting some air and a slice of pizza and was surprised to find that her favorite was still untouched, which was a miracle in such a crowded house.
“Tara said that you liked this flavor,” your voice coming from nearby startled her and Sam saw you gesture to the box in front of her, “My treat, for the other day.”
She cleared her throat hesitantly, “You didn’t have to.”
“I did,” you dismissed with a wider smile, “My dog ​​left you without dinner.”
Sam didn’t respond, but you leaned against the counter next to her anyway, picking at the dark polish on your nails casually, listening to your friends arguing in the background.
“Get tired of the crowd?” Sam asked, deciding that ignoring you wasn’t an option since you clearly weren’t leaving.
“Yeah,” you agreed, shrugging with an odd laugh, “I guess I’ve had enough socializing for one day.”
Sam wasn’t sure why she didn’t just send you away then, seizing the perfect chance to dismiss you like she’d wanted all along and avail everyone's presence to remind that you weren’t welcome, but that strange spark flared in her and made her smile unconsciously, more sincere than the previous tense ones.
“Oh, I know what you mean,” she agreed slowly.
Your expression brightens in surprise, as if you expected a cold, blunt rejection or maybe a slap (probably both) and Sam feels a bit guilty by it. Sighing, she waves you towards the apartment’s tiny balcony, silently inviting you to join her, to which you respond with a firm nod as you watch her unwind the chain on the sliding door – they keep everything locked up tight now – and follow her.
Sam swears she’s not doing this to be nice or anything, all she wants is to repay you for your politeness, that’s all.
The night breeze is refreshing and sends pleasant shivers down your arms and shoulders as Sam leans against the railing and the two of you fall silent. It’s pleasant, actually.
Sam takes a moment to look at you, like, really look at you for the first time since you met and her breath hitches.
Your relaxed features look cheerful and are well-emphasized by the makeup you’re wearing – she tries to search her memory and gets frustrated when she can’t remember if it’s the same style as the night you met – your hair blows a little in the wind and your clothes just fit. Every single thing about you seems to have been specially made to be this way, charming, beautiful.
Your elbow brushes hers in the small space as you lean in to better contemplate the dreary, empty New York sky and Sam’s skin is burning and she doesn’t understand why.
Sam didn’t realize, through all the haze of anger and suspicion and tantrum, until she was touching a pretty girl, that you were, in fact, a pretty girl.
Shit.
“You’re trying so hard not to like her that I’m getting embarrassed for you.”
It’s late. Everyone has already left, including you, who went early claiming you had to work the next morning. Tara should be in bed by now, but she’d be upset if Sam told her to do that, so she doesn’t say anything.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Sam dismisses, packing up the last of the leftover pizza to put in the fridge.
“But you do,” Tara hums smugly, stifling a yawn, “Just admit that you were wrong and that I’ve made a friend who’s not a potential serial killer. And that you might have a crush on her. I saw you two on the balcony.”
“It wasn’t like that,” she grumbles, “And I wasn’t wrong for being worried that you brought home a stranger without telling me, even if she’s not dangerous.”
“Ha!” Tara points out, “So you admit she’s no danger.”
Sam sighs tiredly, bringing a hand up to massage her temple, “She can keep coming over for movie nights or whatever if that’s what you're asking me.”
Tara cheered, jumping up from where she was sitting on the counter to finally go to sleep. She stopped just before turning the corner to her room.
“Seriously though,” she caught Sam’s attention, “You guys have more in common then you might think, that’s why I like her. I think you could too, if you get to know her better.”
“That’s impossible, Tar,” Sam says weary, looking at her sister with the most done expression, “I don’t ‘get to know’ anyone, I already have all the people I need in my life.”
“Maybe you’ll be surprised,” she shrugged, “It would be good for you anyway.”
Sam's approval was all Tara needed to make you a regular fixture in their lives and make movie nights an official thing. Sam usually walks in when they're in full swing, with the two of you deep in conversation about the completely random movie you decided to watch that day, and now she greets you back instead of ignoring like she did before and you look happier every time she does it openly.
She finds excuses to wander around the living room and kitchen when she hears Tara pause the tv for whatever reason, just so she doesn't leave you unsupervised in their house – it was still too early to rule out all the care, after all. It ends up making her feel kind of ridiculous, because, hell, she shouldn't have to make excuses to wander around her own house! But you guys talk during these moments, sometimes.
Sam learns more about you as time goes on, and she tells herself that it's just gathering information, that you're not friends at all, but she finds herself soaking up every bit of detail. What are you majoring in, how long have you been in town, if you live close to campus like most students or if you have roommates like them.
(Actually, when she thinks about it now, Sam probably sounded more like a maniac trying to find out where you live, but at least you didn’t call her out on it.)
Then movie nights are joined by study sessions that Tara insists on having as her first week of finals approaches, and you manage to convince Sam to let you bring your puppy too so he won’t be alone for so many hours and she can act a little more normal around you and have a conversation that doesn’t sound like a job interview. You tell her about the movies you like – which consist of more than just an extensive list of slashers like she initially assumed – in a loud and excited tone instead of your usual repressed one, and it stirs something inside her, which leads to several other facts. Your favorite color, what kind of music you like, what you do when her sister isn't dragging you somewhere, and why you decided to adopt a dog so young when you already had so many other responsibilities.
“He helps me not feel alone,” you replied, looking deep into her eyes, “my roommate graduated last year and moved out. I guess I couldn’t stand coming home to empty houses, you know? And he’s my guard dog, he takes care of me and I take care of him. The little guy might be small but knows how to do damage.”
She could relate to that, in part.
And then you start asking too, suddenly and Sam finds herself with a dilemma after so long avoiding your attempts to get to know her. She’d rather remain closed off.
But a trade isn’t a fair trade unless she gives you something back, is it? And you’ve been quenching her thirst for knowledge for a long time now, you gave her a lot.
So, during one night when you insist on helping her make dinner, she confides in you – somewhat reluctantly – that she really enjoys cooking, especially healthier meals. She doesn't look at you, nor does she say it clearly but still, you listen and Sam is surprised when she finds herself speaking.
“You really should ask her out.”
And of course, Tara is always close enough to raise an eyebrow with a knowing look at her on practically every occasion.
“I've told you already, it's not like that.”
“You're cuddling her dog right now.”
“Just so he stays quiet and doesn't disturb you two! Shouldn't you be studying, by the way?”
“Ugh, you’re so annoying.”
Sam can almost, almost admit that you're her friend too.
(Though she kinda wished it were a little more than that.)
Movie nights evolve into sleepovers, because Sam argues that it’s simply too late and dangerous for you to come back alone and she feels embarrassed – and guilty as much – when Quinn brings up that it has always been dangerous and she didn’t mind letting you go before, when she didn’t care about you.
Now there are some of your clothes in a drawer Tara set aside for you just like a colorful food bowl in the living room for your dog – Mindy jokes that it's theirs now – and there’s rarely a day that goes by where she doesn’t see you.
And when you don’t come over, Tara makes sure to remind her of how anxious she looks waiting for a knock on the door and how she lights up when you greet her first when you finally arrive.
“I swear that now she comes here more to see you than me.”
“You’re imagining things.”
“Yeah, sure,” she huffs, “And when are you gonna make a move again?”
“Never, Tara.”
Sam hasn't heard a thing about you in days. Tara said yesterday that you ended up getting really busy with a college project, preparing a presentation that, her sister quotes, 'needs to be perfect because public speaking is horrible and there's a big chance I'll embarrass myself.'
It's not that Sam asked, it's just that she doesn't text you often and Tara thought it would be convenient to talk about it out loud when she was on the phone with Mindy.
Anyway, it doesn't really matter, it's not like you two are close. You are Tara's friend. If it weren't for her, you two wouldn't even have a reason to see each other. There's no reason to be so stressed.
But she misses you anyway. She's having a shitty day at her shitty job and everything seems to go by even slower because Sam knows that when she gets home at night you probably won't be on the couch waiting with the soft smile she's grown accustomed to looking forward and if she has to deal with another group of rude teenagers she'll freak out.
The sound of the bell ringing at the entrance draws Sam’s attention back to the counter and she ends up face to face with the person who has been on her mind all day.
“Sam!” you approached with a tired smile, your dog wagging his tail happily on a leash in one hand and a paper bag in the other, “I was looking for you.”
You'd never visited her at work before, she didn't even know you knew where it was, having only mentioned it in passing, but there you were, with the smile she wanted to see and bags under your eyes.
“Hi,” she cleared her throat, feeling her face heat up. Damn, she looked like a teen girl with a crush, “I didn't expect to see you here, what, uhm, what do you need?”
You snorted at her flustered attending voice. Seeing her show any kind of nervousness was very unusual.
“Tara called me today demanding I get out of the house for a bit and ‘touch some grass’, so I decided to bring this buddy along, he was begging me for a proper walk,” you shrugged, “And she asked me to bring your lunch.”
Sam paused at that, Tara definitely didn't make lunches for her, much less go to the trouble of delivering them like that.
“...Thank you,” she accepted the paper bag you held out delicately, eyeing the package suspiciously. You held back a giggle when she looked at you again, “Anything else?”
“Oh, um,” you shifted your weight from one foot to the other, obviously nervous, “I’m taking Koda to the park nearby and I thought maybe you’d like to come with us. If you can, of course.”
Sam couldn’t really, it was still a few hours before her shift ended at the coffee shop, but she didn’t want you to leave without the promise of seeing you again.
“Of course,” she found herself replying instead, “I can meet you there in a few minutes.”
She knew she’d made the right decision when you gifted her with one of your warm smiles.
“Okay! Nice,” you nod, absently twirling your dog’s leash around your fingers, startled by the sudden, loud bark he lets out at the delay, breaking the oblivious bubble you were in, “Alright, I should go before he starts trying to jump over the counter.”
Sam barely hears the sound of the bell announcing your departure over how loudly her heart pounds in her ears.
It takes a lot of willpower and her last pack of good cigarettes to convince her insufferable coworker — who’d watched the whole thing with a bored expression and loudly chewing gum while cleaning the coffee machine — to cover the rest of her shift. He ended up ordering her lunch too, thinking it might be something special, only to complain when he was met with a sad peanut butter and jelly sandwich and a carton of warm apple juice. Tara really didn’t cook… but then why had she done that?
(She laughed at him anyway.)
“You owe me, Carpenter,” he grumbled, taping a note to her arm that had fallen out of the package.
“Yeah, yeah. Whatever.”
Sam was out the door before he could change his mind.
Taking a deep breath of the damp autumn air, she picked up the yellow post-it note curiously, recognizing her sister’s handwriting immediately.
‘u looked so depressed lately that I
decided to send u a gift
DO something this time
good luck!!’
She knew. She fucking knew that smartass had set her up. Sam should have guessed it before. Tara would never let her get away with this without doing something with her own hands. At least she hadn’t brought Mindy into the scheme this time.
The park you had mentioned was more like a small square and with the rainy cold weather of the last few days, it was pretty empty. Sam could spot you without difficulty, sitting on one of the few benches watching the scenery and she made her presence known when she got close enough.
“Can he even sit still sometimes?” Sam asked, hands in her bomber jacket pockets, pointing with her chin at the dog playing alone on the grass. You moved a little so she could sit next to you and subtly moved closer when she did.
“It rained last night and he's a big fan of puddles,” you chuckled, “I guess he's just excited, we haven't been out much lately.”
He wasn't the puppy he'd been when Sam had first seen him a few months ago and the sight of him running around the trees chasing flowers and stray twigs was actually quite funny.
“He's so covered in mud that it looks like a bear.”
“Well, his name's Koda,” you pointed out amusedly, “I would have called him Pongo but he always looked more like a small bear than a dalmatian anyway.”
She snorted, “If you say so.”
Sam couldn't remember a time when she felt so relaxed, with the weight of your shoulder resting against hers, enjoying the weather of the early season, the ground covered in orange and yellow leaves framing your surroundings.
She couldn't stop the restlessness she felt inside her chest, watching your profile. Feeling warm inside, but also shivering with a terrible fear of ruining everything. Do something, do something, do something echoing like a mantra in her head.
Sam took a deep breath. She'd faced murderers before, for God's sake! She could be braver than that.
"So..." She coughed, "Tara set this up, you know? The lunch stuff and everything."
You turned your attention to Sam, raising an eyebrow with a confused look.
"She did?" You asked, "Why would she do that?"
It's now or never, Carpenter. Focus.
“She did it so I could see you,” she looked away, “Because I missed you. Because I…” She felt your hand reach for hers and noticed a fallen leaf on your shoulder.
“Because you…?” your voice echoed anxious. She could do this. She's going to do this.
“I—”
A loud howl scared the two of you and you turned to see Koda behind a pile of leaves, pupils dilated and jumping up and down.
“Oh no.”
“What?” She stammered.
“He saw a pigeon.”
You see, Sam is not a pet person. She has only had one guinea pig her entire life and only before her father left and a 6-year-old Tara let it escape from its cage never to be seen again – poor Darwin would always be remembered – she does not know how to handle dogs, much less big, excitable ones like yours.
Yet she grabs the leash from your hands when you finally reach your dog who won't stop barking at a tree and ignores your warnings that he is heavy and strong, Sam, it will end up dragging you away and tries to gently pull him to convince him to let go so you can get out of there. Because she is big and strong and she wants to show you that she can handle a mere happy dog.
He acknowledges her like she wanted and also drags her like you said he would.
This manages to surprise her more than the first stab wound she took, how one minute she’s standing still, telling your silly dog ​​to walk in a confident condescending tone, and the next she’s running at full speed through the trees and puddles of the park, your worried voice ringing behind her, as does your laughter.
“Sam!” you exclaimed from a distance, hands cupped around your mouth and dark red scarf falling from your neck, “You need to stop!”
She does stop, yes, but only after your dog has already circled her and Sam must be a ridiculous sight with a colorful leash wrapped around her legs and a dog panting with its tongue out next to her.
“Oh my god,” you lean in closer, unable to hide the amusement in your voice, “Are you okay?”
Sam huffed, feeling a strand of hair fall across her face: “A little help would be appreciated.”
“Sure,” you laughed, reaching out to carefully untangle it, “Maybe I should call him Pongo after all.”
She rolled her eyes: “Don’t mock me.”
“I’m not mocking you, it’s just cute.”
Sam opened her mouth to retort, only to realize how close you two were, with your hands resting on her shoulders to steady her and your faces just inches apart, your breath tickling her skin. You seemed to realize the same thing, tongue coming out to wet your lips, your gaze fixed on her mouth.
Do something. Do something. Do something.
She finally does something. She kisses you.
It's all a mix of sensations, she feels when you sigh, breathing through your nose in surprise and satisfaction, she feels where your hands tighten on the fabric of her jacket and tastes you, warm lips contrasting with the cold skin of your cheeks, with traces of coffee, lipstick and something else so undeniably you that Sam swears her heart might stop.
You pull apart hesitantly, breathing fast, noses touching, eyes shining, and she feels herself falling, literally. Your dog jumps on your waist, demanding to be petted, and you fall, taking Sam with you.
Landing in a pile of leaves is more uncomfortable than the movies make it out to be, but Sam can’t find it in herself to protest when you’re the one on top of her. She smiles and you laugh out loud. She didn’t mess up.
“You’re covered in leaves,” you say, running your fingers through her hair, “And your face is smeared with black lipstick.”
She scoffs, “I wonder who’s responsible for that.”
“He is,” you point innocently at the dog standing next to you.
Sam rolls her eyes, but cups your face with her cold hands to pull you close again, and the second kiss she gives you is just as magical as the first.
Tara doesn’t expect to find a dog taking up the entire couch for the first time in days when she comes back from Chad’s dorm after sending you off on a fake mission to find her sister. Yet, hours later, there it is, with one of the sneakers she forgot to put away when she got home from class stuck in his mouth and trails of mud and leaves across the room.
“C’mon, man, that’s not a toy!”
She hears a laugh and finds herself face to face with Sam, looking completely filthy despite the sound of the shower running in the hallway and Tara knows Quinn isn’t home yet. Oh.
“So, you finally did something?”
Sam nods solemnly, pointing to the dark kiss etched into her jaw.
“I did.”
594 notes · View notes
dilfenthusiast-union · 2 months ago
Note
Can you please do Josh and reader watching a movie?
I absolutely can anon! Gonna do a horror movie cuz that’s on theme HAHA. I hope this satisfies your Josh craving 🫶 feel free to request something different if not 🫡
Study Session
Tumblr media
Joshua “Josh” Washington x Reader
I ended up referencing an old German film so if anyone can figure out what it is from the very vague description I gave then here’s a sweet treat 🍰
Gonna update the gif when ppl start making gifs of the sexy delicious remake
GIF updated with cutie Josh passed out in front of the fireplace literally the exact vibes IM LIVING
“You got the snacks, princess?” Josh calls out from the living room, as he sets up the projector for your weekly “special movie” night.
As part of Josh’s psychology degree, he had the chance to pick a major, and to him and his parents, it was a no brainer— film.
However, what he didn’t anticipate was the amount of weird, silent movies from the 1920s that he had to analyse in his classes.
“It’s like watching paint dry!” He exclaims, “I get that I have to understand the rules of film before breaking them, but Dad’s been doing this since before I was even an idea!” Josh drags on.
“Josh, babe. You’re starting really to sound like every nepo baby in Hollywood. I love you!…but shut up.” you peck him on the lips before pulling back to smile at him, a kinder way of telling him to shut his trap about his first world problems. He smiles dumb from the small act of affection and touch love, unable to recall what was bothering him in the first place as you dissolve his worries.”
Upon hearing his complaints, you suggest making it into a movie night, as opposed to a traditional study session where you’re both hunched over your laptops and textbooks.
Your idea sends a colony of butterflies into Josh’s stomach— you want to watch a boring movie with him? The fact that you want to spend time doing mundane things, like studying with him, makes him envision a life of pure domesticity. How could he say no to an opportunity to cuddle and be with his partner?
Before you know it, you’re microwaving popcorn and opening packets of lollies to enjoy (and to pass the time).
“Just about done! The popcorn is extremely fresh so enjoy with caution!” You mention as you pinch the bag from the top to avoid burning yourself.
He stands back up from setting up the projector equipment, looking at you with warm eyes. He questions “Are you saying that because you nearly burnt your mouth trying to eat it?”, his tone underscored with amusement.
“Guilty.” The one word expresses your regret for attempting to snack early. You settle the bags of snacks and popcorn on the coffee table, and sink into the pullout couch, ready to be entertained.
“What is this movie about exactly? The cover looks kinda freaky, I won’t lie” you examine the starting screen projected on the wall. Josh appreciates how you’re eager to demonstrate an interest in his studies despite not knowing too much.
“In the most succinct way I can say it without spoiling things…” he trails off, “A vampire tries his hand at real estate, and rats wipe out a town of people!” Your face morphs from interested to deadpan at the lack of proper context, “I guess I just gotta watch and see, hey?”
“Precisely, princess.” Josh affirms as he sits down next to you. His pet names for you never cease to make your core temperature rise with the influx of butterflies. As he wraps an arm around your frame, he presses play on the film.
Josh adds, “Thankfully for us, there’s English subtitles… because this entire movie is in German. So you’re gonna have to focus just as much as me, and resist the urge to go on Instagram.” He kisses your head to avoid any rebuttal from you.
An hour passes by and at this point both you and Josh become extremely comfortable on the couch. Lying down whilst cuddling, you hold eachother accountable by not scrolling in your phones and actually discussing the plot of the film and the main points Josh needs to remember for his analysis. The movie finishes and you’re both still awake.
Josh breaks the comfortable silence, turning to admire your features “Thanks for watching this boring movie with me, babe. You made this way more fun for me.” he pecks your forehead, followed by the tip of your nose. He gazes at your lips longingly, before looking into your half-lidded eyes and receiving a small nod.
He leans into to kiss you passionately, receiving a mutual signal from your eagerness. He can feel the heat radiating off your cheeks and he’s sure you can hear his pulse rapidly increasing the longer you two occupy the same space.
You place your hands on his broad chest, feeling him gently and slowly. Josh wraps his arms around your waist and places you in his lap, and breaks away from the kiss. You catch your breath simultaneously, staring into eachother’s eyes, as if you’re telepathically communicating your love for each-other.
“Josh, there’s no need to thank me. I’ll do just about anything with you. Because, as long as it’s you, nothing can possibly be boring.” you cut into the hot silence.
Josh revels in your statement, his eyebrows raised “Are you saying you liked the movie?” his amusement is discernible at this point. He looks at you like you contain galaxies in your eyes.
You give him a kiss on the lips again before breaking away again and grinning widely “I actually did, and I like spending time with my boyfriend.. let’s study more often!” You suggest lightly.
Josh picks you up to carry you bridal style, walking down the hall to your shared bedroom, “I can think of a different kind of studying we can do. Don’t you have an anatomy exam soon?” he smirks before laying you down on the bed, wedging a knee between your legs and trapping you in his arms.
Maybe this studying will involve an all-nighter for the two of you.
566 notes · View notes
mashkaroom · 2 years ago
Text
Translation thoughts on the greatest poem of our time, “His wife has filled his house with chintz. To keep it real I fuck him on the floor”
It’s actually quite tricky to translate. Because it’s so short, each word and grammatical construction is carrying a lot of weight. It also, as people have noted, plays with registers. “Chintz” is a word with its own set of associations. Chintz is a type of fabric with its origins in India. The disparaging connotation is from chintz’s eventual commonality. Chintz was actually banned from England and France because the local textile mills couldn’t compete.
Keep it real” is tremendously difficult to translate -- it’s a bit difficult to even define. It means to be authentic and genuine, but it also has connotations of staying true to one’s roots. Like many English slang words, it comes first from AAVE. From this article on the phrase:
“[K]eeping it real meant performing an individual’s experience of being Black in the United States. As such, it became a form of resistance. Insisting on a different reality, one that wasn’t recognized by the dominant culture, empowered Black people to ‘forge a parallel system of meaning,’ according to cultural critic Mich Nyawalo...The phrase’s roots in racialized resistance, however, were erased when it was adopted by the mostly-White film world of the 1970s and ’80s....Keeping it real in this context indicated a performance done so well that audiences could forget it was a performance.This version of keeping it real wasn’t about testifying to personal experience; it was about inventing it.”
One has to imagine that jjbang8 did not have the origins of these phrases in mind when composing the poem, but even if by coincidence, the etymological and cultural journeys of these two central lexemes perfectly reflect the themes of the poem. The two words have themselves traveled away from the authenticity they once represented, and, in a new context, have taken on new meanings -- the hero of our poem, the unnamed “him”, is, presumably, in quite a similar situation.
Setting aside the question of register, of the phonology, prosody, and meter of the original, of the information that is transmitted through bits of grammar that don’t necessarily exist in other languages -- a gifted translator might be able to account for all of these -- how do you translate the journey of the words themselves?
In my translations, I decided to go for the most evocative words, even if they don’t evoke the exact same things as in the original. The strength of these two lines is that they imply that there’s more than just what you see, whether that’s the details of the story -- what’s happening in the marriage? how do the narrator and the husband know each other? -- or the cultural background of the very words themselves. I wanted to try and replicate this effect.
Yiddish first:
זייַן ווייַב האָט אָנגעפֿילט זייַן הויז מיט הבלים
צו בלייַבן וויטיש, איך שטוף אים אופֿן דיל. zayn vayb hot ongefilt zayn hoyz mit havolim.
tsu blaybn vitish, ikh shtup im afn dil
This translation is pretty direct. There is a word for chintz in Yiddish -- tsits -- but, as far as I can tell, it refers only to the fabric; it doesn’t have the same derogatory connotation as in English. I chose, instead, havolim, a loshn-koydesh word that means “vanity, nothingness, nonsense, trifles”. In Hebrew, it can also mean breath or vapor. I chose this over the other competitors because it, too, is a word with a journey and with a secondary meaning. Rather than imagining the bright prints of chintz, we might imagine a more olfactory implication -- his wife has filled his house with perfumes or cleaning fluids. It can carry the implication that something is being masked as well as the associations with vanity and gaudiness.
Vitish -- Okay, this is a good one. Keep in mind, of course, that I’ve never heard or seen it used before today, so my understanding of its nuances is very limited, but I’ll explain to you exactly how I am sourcing its meaning. The Comprehensive Yiddish-English Dictionary (CYED) gives this as “gone astray (esp. woman); slang correct, honest”. I used the Yiddish Book Center’s optical character recognition software, which allows you to search for strings in their corpus, to confirm that both usages are, in fact, attested. It’s a pretty rare word in text, though, as the CYED implies, it might have been more common in spoken speech. It appears in a glossary in “Bay unds yuden” (Among Us Jews) as a thieves cant word, where it’s definted as נאַריש, שרעקעוודיק, אונבעהאלפ. אויך נישט גנביש. אין דער דייַטשער גאַונער-שפראַך --  witsch -- נאַריש, or “foolish, terrible, clumsy/pathetic. not of the thieves world. in the German thieves cant witsch means foolish”. A vitishe nekeyve (vitishe woman) is either a slacker or a prostitute. I can’t prove this for sure, but my sense is that it might come from the same root as vitz, joke (it’s used a couple of times in the corpus to mention laughing at a vitish remark -- which makes it seem kind of similar to witty). I assume the German thieve’s cant that’s being referred to is Rotwelsch, which has its own fascinating history and, in fact, incorporates a lot of Yiddish. In fact, for this reason, some of the first Yiddish linguists were actually criminologists! What an excellent set of associations, no? It has the slangy sense of straightforward of honest; it has a sense of sexual non-normativity (we might use it to read into the relationship between the narrator and the husband) -- and a feminized one at that; it was used by an underground subculture, and, again, the meaning there was quite different -- like the “real” in “keeping it real” it was used to indicate whether or not someone was “in” on the life (tho “real” is used to mean that the person is in, while “vitish” is used to mean they’re not). It’s variety of meanings are more ambiguous than “keep it real”, which can pretty much only be read positively, and it also brings in a tinge of criminality. Though it doesn’t have the same exact connotations as “keep it real”, I think it’s about as ideal of a fit as we’ll get because it’s equally evocative of more below the surface. I also chose “tsu blaybn vitish”, which is “to stay vitish”, as opposed to something like “to make it vitish” to keep the slight ambiguity of time that “keep it real” has -- keeping it real does< I think, imply that there is a pre-existing “real” to which one can adhere, so I wanted to imply the same.
The rest is straight-forward. “Shtup” is one of a few words the Comprehensive English-Yiddish Dictionary (CEYD) gives for “fuck”, and I think it has a nice sound.
Ok, now Russian
женой твой дом наполнен финтифлюшками
чтоб не блудить с пути, ебемся на полу
zhenoy tvoy dom napolnin fintiflyushkami.
shtob ne bludit’ s puti’, yebyomsya na polu
In order to preserve, more or less, the iambic meter, I made a few more changes here -- since Russian, unlike Yiddish, is not a Germanic language, it’s harder to keep the same structure + word order while also maintaining the rhythm. I would translate this back to English as:
“Your house is filled with trifles by your wife. To not stray off the path, we’re fucking on the floor”
So a few notes before we get into the choice of words for “chintz” and “keep it real”. To preserve the iamb, I changed “his” to “your”. This changes the lines from a narration of events to some outside party to a conversation between the two men at the center. Russian also has both formal and informal you (formal you is also the plural form, as is the case in a number of other languages). I went with informal you because I wanted to preserve the fact that his wife has filled his house not their house, as someone pointed out in the original chain (though I don’t think that differentiation is nearly as striking in the 2nd person) and because it’s unlikely you’d be on formal you with someone you’re fucking (unless it’s, like, a kink thing). I honestly didn’t even consider making it formal, but that would actually raise a lot of interesting implications about the relationship between the speaker and the husband, as well as with what that means about the “realness” of the situation. Is, in fact, the narrator only creating a mirage of a more real, more meaningful encounter, while the actual truth -- that there is a woman the husband has made promises to that he’s betraying -- is obscured? that this intimacy is just a facade? Is there perhaps some sort of power differential that the narrator wishes to point out? Or perhaps is the way that the narrator is keeping it real by pointing out the distance between the two of them? there is no pretense of intimacy, the narrator is calling this what it is -- an encounter without deeper significance?
Much to think about, but I actually think the two men do have history --  i think the narrator remembers the house back when it was actually only “his house” and was as yet unfilled with chintz. We also don’t know what they were calling each other prior to this moment. This could be the first time they switched to the informal you. 
Ok moving on, I originally translated it as “твой дом наполнен финтифлюшками жены”. Honestly, this sounds more elegant than what I have now, but I ultimately though removing the wife from either a subject or agent position (grammatically, I mean) was too big a betrayal of the original. The original judges the wife. She took an active role in filling the house. If she were made passive, that read is certainly a possible one -- perhaps even the dominant one -- but it could also read more like “we are doing this in a space filled with reminders of his wife and the life they share” -- the action of filling is no longer what’s being focused on. Why do I say the current translation is inelegant? I feel you stumble over it a little, because it’s almost a garden path sentence. This is also an assset though. “Zhenoy tvoy dom napolnen” is a fully grammatical sentence on its own, and it means “Your house is filled by your wife” -- as in English, the primary read is that the wife is what the house is full of. If the sentence makes you stumble, perhaps that’s even good -- we focus, for good reason, on the relationship between the two men, but in a translation, the wife is able to draw more attention to herself.
Ok, chintz: I chose the word “финтифлюшки” (fintiflyushki), meaning trifle/bobble/tchotchke, because it, allegedly, comes from the german phrase finten und flausen, meaning illusions and vanity/nonsense. Once again, I like that the word has a journey, specifically a cross-linguistic one.
Keep it real: this one, frankly, fails to capture the impact of the original, in my opinion, but allow me to explain the reasoning. “Stray off the path” implies, again, that there is some sort of path that both the narrator and the husband were on before the wife and the chintz -- and one they intend to continue taking, one that this act is a maintenance of. It brings in a little irony, since the husband very much is straying from the path of his marriage. “Bludit’“ can also mean to be unfaithful in a marriage (as, in fact, can “stray”). The proto-slavic word it comes from can mean to delude or debauch -- they want to do the latter but not the former.
As for register -- “shtob” is a bit informal. I would write the full version (shto by) in an email, for example. The word for fuck, yebyomsa, is from one of the “mat” words, the extra special top tier of russian swears, definitely not to be said in polite company (and, if you are a man of a certain generation or background, not in front of women; it’s not that the use of mat automatically invokes a male-only environment, but if we’re already thinking that deeply about it. But while we’re on the topic, i will say that in my circles in the US, women use mat much more actively than men (at least in front of me, who was, up until recently, a woman and also a child).)
Ok i think that’s all the comments i have!
6K notes · View notes
dorabellingham · 2 months ago
Text
Floodlights
Tumblr media
warnings: none
characters: jude x fem!reader
summary: when you make a cameo in his series
may contain spelling and translation errors!
The camera began with a panoramic view of the city of Madrid, with the golden light of the sunset reflecting on the streets. Jude's smooth narration fills the silence as he describes life as a professional football player.
—Being a player is more than just living the dream, it's more than titles, more than recognition... It's a constant battle between success and real life.
The image changes to a sequence of him in different stadiums, wearing the Real Madrid shirt, then the English team. He smiles and continues:
—But what many people don't see is the most important part, which happens away from the spotlight.
The camera moved smoothly to a studio lit by warm lights. Bellingham is sitting casually on a couch, and next to him, you.
You're both relaxed, with Jude wearing something simple, like a white shirt and jeans, and you in a muted green dress. You seem a little shy, a stark contrast to the natural confidence of the man next to you. On the corner of the table, a photo of you on one of your many trips together is prominent.
—You know... most people don't know Y/n behind the cameras, but she has always been the basis of everything in my life. I was a 15 year old boy when we met. And believe it or not, everything changed after that day.
The camera briefly focused on you, who smiled sideways, a little shyly.
You, with a discreet smile, interrupted.
—I remember that day like it was yesterday. I didn't know who Jude Bellingham was... football wasn't my thing.
*a short video starts filling the screen*
The sound of young laughter fills the air as a home video starts playing. The scene shows you and 15-year-old Jude laughing at a simple party. Both are surrounded by friends, including Bukayo Saka, who is filming.
—Jude was...just a kid at the party. —You narrate, while the video shows the young player trying to talk to you for the first time, visibly nervous. —Actually, I thought he was Saka's childhood friend or something!
You laugh.
Jude, laughing, complements his wife's speech.
—I was sure she was dating Saka or Dele. I couldn't understand how someone like her could be single.
Soon the scene changed to an interview of Bukayo and Bamidele, sitting on the same sofa a few days later. They are clearly at ease, laughing about old memories.
—Jude was completely obsessed, seriously. He asked me every day about Y/n, as if I were the older brother who had to approve the relationship or something. It was hilarious.
Saka said, while smiling remembering everything.
—When she came to watch some of our training, something really friendly, Jude didn't hit the goal at all. He looked like he was in the moon world.
Dele commented, crying, laughing.
The scene soon returned to the couple, after the surprise presence of the two close friends. As Jude and you continued talking, the camera cuts to a montage of photos and videos showing the development of your relationship over the years. The screen displays a sequence of photos of you in various places around the world, starting with a selfie in a London cafe and moving through photos from trips to Santorini, Miami and Paris. Each image captures the love and complicity between you.
You say, reflexively:
—I never thought dating someone in football would be easy, you know? I always had this image... football players train, the pressure is a lot, and they are always on the road.
The camera cuts to an image of the you in Ibiza, with the sunset in the background and Jude kissing your cheek.
You continue, smiling sideways.
—But Jude always proved me wrong. He was different from the beginning. And I think that's why, even in the most difficult parts, we always found a way to support each other.
The tone of the song softened as the camera panned back to you in the studio. The mood is now a little more serious, but still light.
Bellingham, looking at you, deeply.
—Being a football player has its difficulties. I remember when things were really complicated... when the pressure was too much. It was at that time that I realized how essential her support was. I was at the height of my career, but at the same time, it was the time when I needed emotional support the most.
You exchanged passionate smiles and your hands met on his legs.
—She doesn't need to say anything. Just being there was enough.
With Jude now showing a slight smile, the camera cuts to an image of you in Madrid, you holding a baby. The image is followed by another montage, this time of you celebrating important victories, with you always by his side.
—If I am the player I am today, it is because of her. It's not just about what happens on the field, it's what happens off it too.
You, who smiled, visibly moved, looked at Jude and said.
—And I've never needed more than what we have. He always made sure I felt safe, that I knew how much he loved me.
The documentary moves to a more relaxed part, where the camera hits you in a country house. The sound of children's laughter fills the air as you play with the still small Benji. You're running through the grass, Jude trying to teach your son how to kick a ball, while you watch fondly.
Jude, now with a more playful tone, said.
—I never thought it would be so good to have a family. Seeing Y/n with Benjamin... makes me realize how unique our journey was. She was the start of it all.
The camera then showed a home video of a family Christmas, with you hugging your parents and family around the tree. It's a genuine moment, full of laughter and joy, that shows a simple and real life behind the fame.
—Football gave me a lot, but my family gave me what really matters.
The episode ended with you sitting on the couch again, now more relaxed. You laughed at an inside joke, and the camera captured this moment of silent intimacy, a demonstration of the quiet, steadfast love you share.
—I know that, at the end of the day, when it's all over... this is what will remain. Us. Y/n was and will always be my biggest support. And everything we built together only makes me sure that the future is ours.
Jude said, his voice shaking slightly.
The camera focused on you, who, still shy, smiled and said:
—I just want him to continue to be happy and mine... that's all that matters.
The speech drew a line from everyone present on the set, and even made Jude try to wink at the camera, but it left something to be desired.
—I promise that by the next episode I will have taught him how to blink!
279 notes · View notes
ashwhowrites · 7 months ago
Text
Wrong story
Heavily inspired by the film Miller's Girl. If you haven't seen it, I highly recommend it because Jenna Ortega is excellent 👌🏻
Modern AU
⚠️smut, smut and more smut
Summary - Y/N has a crush on her teacher, filled with inappropriate thoughts she needs a release. So she writes it out...and accidentally sends it to him.
I hope you guys enjoy this and love it! 🫶🏻
Tumblr media
Y/N knew it was a horrible idea to have a crush on her English teacher, but she couldn't help it. The second she walked into that class and saw him standing there in dress pants and a button-up, she was in trouble.
The first week, she did not learn a thing. She couldn't think straight when he'd look over at her. His dark eyes, his long hair that rested perfectly on his shoulders, and the tattoos that peaked through his rolled-up sleeves. She wondered if he had tattoos elsewhere, and how much of his skin was inked. Did he have naked skin that she could mark herself?
She also knew it was inappropriate to think about him the way she did. She spent so many nights in her dorm room alone, dreaming of being fucked on his desk. She wanted his hands all over her, his teeth on her skin and his tongue tasting her.
Now, she had more control over her thoughts and could pay attention in his class. Before she knew it, her writing and understanding skills blew him away. He talked to her about her work, always praising, and challenging her.
"Another great assignment," He said as he placed her paper in front of her. She clenched her thighs as he walked past, his scent lingering behind.
"Thank you, Mr. Munson."
He turned around and gave her a small wink, and she felt like she melted into a puddle.
"You are all dismissed, have a good weekend."
~
"He was so checking you out," Tate teased as she and Y/N left the classroom.
"Will you shut up! He was not," Y/N scoffed.
"Another great assignment, wish you used those fingers for more than just typing," Tate said in a seductive voice, deepening her voice to sound like Eddie.
"Oh stop," Y/N laughed as she shoved Tate. "I wish, but he probably has a girlfriend, someone his age. And not someone he'd lose a job for dating."
"Believe what you want, but I've got two eyes and I watched as he landed on your ass yesterday when you wore that plaid skirt. I bet he was having little schoolgirl fantasies." Tate gasped with a huge smile.
"Do you think of anything other than sex, you perv?" Y/N teased as they walked out of the building.
~~~
Y/N couldn't lie, she thought about what Tate said all weekend. Was he checking her out? Or was Tate poking at her crush?
Y/N folded her laundry and her hands touched the red and black plaid skirt. She felt a smile stretch across her face as she thought back to Tate.
Maybe she should see for herself?
~
Y/N felt a rush of confidence as she walked into Eddie's class. Her skirt flowed against her thighs and her black long-sleeved body suit hugged her body.
She'd deny it but she spent extra hours getting ready in the morning.
"You little slut," Tate snickered
"What?" Y/N asked, acting dumb as she stood in front of Tate's table.
"The skirt, the tight bodysuit. Someone is putting on a show."
"I just...wanted to find out for myself." Y/N shrugged, it wasn't a big deal.
"Ms. Y/L/N, mind taking a seat?"
Y/N turned around to see Mr. Munson waiting for her. She blushed and quickly ran to her seat, a quiet apology on her tongue.
"After you finish your book for the independent reading, I want you to write a story written in the same way as the author."
Y/N felt the color drain from her face. She didn't know the book she picked would matter. And there was no way she could write a story and face him after he read it.
~
The second class was over she walked up to his desk. Tate watched with delight as she stayed in the back.
"Um, Mr. Munson," she said shyly.
Eddie looked up and smiled. She felt her heart race as his full attention was on her. His eyes looked into hers.
"I wasn't aware the book we chose would matter, and the book I've been reading is a tad mature." Y/N blushed.
"That's alright. You are an incredible writer and I don't think you'll have any difficulties." Eddie explained
"That's not the issue. The book is um," she leaned down so Tate couldn't hear. Eddie noticeably shifted as her face got closer to his. His eyes were quick to look down at her chest before snapping back up. "It's smut." She clenched her eyes shut in embarrassment.
Eddie felt his face heat up as he coughed, "Oh! Um you...uh...yeah. Different book then?" he stuttered out.
"Thank you, Mr. Munson," she said before she rushed out of the room. Eddie couldn't help but look as she walked away. He bit his lip as his eyes traveled down to her exposed legs, then up to the roundness of her ass and the way her hips moved.
He jumped out of his daydream when Tate coughed. She sent him a little knowing smirk then went out after Y/N.
~~~
Y/N finished a different book and stared at the blank paper on her computer. The assignment was due tomorrow and she had gotten nowhere in the past week.
She couldn't focus, all she could think about was the dirty words in her other book. She was guilty of imagining the male lead as Eddie, so now she was distracted by how sexually frustrated she was.
She opened a new tab and let her imagination go wild. All the dirty images flowed into words as she typed. She clenched her thighs as she wrote about him. She needed it out of her system so she could focus on her real paper.
~
Finally, at midnight she finished her real paper. Her eyes burned and her fingers were sore but she finished the assignment. She yawned as she sent the paper to his email. Once she heard it send, she shut down her computer and headed to bed.
~~~
It was Sunday morning and Eddie dedicated the day to reading through all the papers he had to grade.
He looked through his email as he rested in bed, still in his boxers and naked chest. His laptop rested on his stomach as he scrolled until he found the one he was searching for.
He smiled once he found Y/N's name. He knew he wasn't supposed to have favorites, but she was so creative and smart. He was her top student. He loved watching her work and seeing the passion she had. It was something they had in common.
He opened her story and began to read it.
"Her skin was burning with desire as his skillful hands slithered up her thighs. She panted as he tugged her skirt down to her ankles, the air hit her bare cunt as she shivered. Her nipples hardened as he looked at her, his deep brown watched her expression as he slipped a finger inside of her. He felt his own desire crashing over his body like a wave. She put her hands behind her, her palms flat on his desk as she threw her head back. With her back arched, her hard nipples teased right in his face. He couldn't help but lean forward, wrapping his warm lips around her left nipple, swirling his tongue around the flesh. Another finger slipped inside of her, then another.
He was three fingers deep in her soaked cunt as his teeth scraped against her nipple. He removed himself with a pop before he moved to her neglected one. Just like the left, he wrapped his lips around her right nipple. His tongue played with her as his fingers picked up their pace. "
Eddie swallowed as he felt himself getting warm. He felt like he should have stopped reading. They discussed doing a different book, did she change her mind? He felt dirty for imagining himself in the fantasy, and even worse that he imagined it was her cunt around his fingers and her nipples in his mouth.
He scratched at the itchiness in his facial hair as he debated on reading further. He also wasn't sure if he'd be allowed to grade this.
He skimmed past a few paragraphs, maybe it was a big opener or something.
"His hard cock pulsed as she bent over his desk. His right hand worked down his body, he grasped his cock in a tight grip as he slowly jerked himself as he looked at her.
"Spread," his demanding voice cut through the thick air. She obeyed, her breasts against the wood as she bent fully over. She spread her legs apart, she waited for his next move with anticipation. He growled as he watched her cunt spread open, he licked his lips as he watched her wetness start to drip down her thigh. She shivered as she felt it.
"Touch me, please," she pathetically whimpered. He smirked at the sound of her wrecked voice. She panted as she heard his heavy footsteps move towards her. His left hand trailed up her spine, up over her shoulder, then harshly gripped around her throat. She choked as he cut off the air to her lungs. His hot breath fanned against her ear as he bit and tugged on her earring.
"I'll touch you when I want to touch you," his voice was low and deep. And his grip on her neck tightened. She felt her body growing weak as he controlled how much air she'd receive. He waited a few seconds before he released her. She gasped as she choked for air, her head feeling light. But she loved every second of it. Every second of being nothing but a body for him to touch, a body for him to fuck, a body for him to torture. He removed his hand from his cock, the building orgasm set aside as he focused on her ass in the air.
His right hand came down to slam down on her ass. The skin burned and flamed as he smacked it over and over. She gripped the desk until her fingers went white, her lip bleeding from how hard she bit her lip to stay quiet. The sound of his skin slapping her flesh echoed throughout the empty classroom. He growled as her skin changed colors and how his handprint burned into her."
Eddie looked around his room, almost scared that he was going to be caught. He felt his cock pulsing in his boxers and he fought to ignore it.
"Finally his thick and hard cock slid inside of her. Her soaked cunt happily stretched open for him. Her legs shook as he fucked her hard. The desk squeaked under their bodies, his hands bruised into her hips. She clawed at the wood as he took no mercy on her. He was fucking her so hard that her body jolted forward with every thrust. She wanted to turn her head to see him, but when she tried his hand pushed her head against the desk.
"This is what you wanted, isn't it? Wearing those tiny skirts to my class with that sweet cunt so easy for me to see. Do you think I don't notice you spreading open your whore legs when I'm lecturing? I can't imagine what you think when you fuck this pathetic cunt, but I know you think of me. But no toys are as big as me, huh?" He mocked. She whimpered at his words, knowing he was right. "And no toys are fucking you as good as me."
"Fuck, Mr. Munson, you fuck me so fucking good." She moaned"
Eddie stared at the screen in shock. Did he read his own name? Was she writing this as...herself? Eddie shivered at the thought, the movement caused his cock to move, and his tip hit something cold and wet. Eddie set his laptop next to him as he threw off the blankets.
He felt embarrassed when he looked down, a huge wet spot of pre-cum stained through his boxers. The pulsing was too hard to ignore, so he reached down to palm himself softly. Just a little touch to ease the ache. The simple touch caused him to moan loudly. He wanted to pull his hand away before he got too caught up but his hand at its own mind.
He slipped his hand inside his boxers, slowly jerking himself as he threw his head back. He sighed at the relief as his cock pulsed in his hand. His eyes looked over to his laptop, and his free hand reached over to scroll.
"He pushed himself fully inside of her, forcing her to feel just how big he was. He sighed in delight as she clamped around him. Like her cunt didn't want him to go anywhere. She was tight and wet, a perfect mixture to make his head spin.
"Feels like you were meant for me," he moaned. She began to move her hips back to match his rhythm. His hands were tight on her hips as the sound of their skin smacking filled their ears. She was moaning and whining, every sound drove him closer to his release."
Eddie moaned as he jerked himself faster. The images flashed through his head as he read. His head was thrown back in pleasure as he pictured her soft body bent over his desk. He was guilty of thinking about it before. Guilty of thinking about her hands and lips wrapped around his cock as he fucked her throat in between classes.
"She came with a loud scream of his name, her body limp against the desk as he fucked her through it. His hands were gentle as he traced up and down her spine, but his cock still drilled inside of her. She shook in sensitivity as he chased his orgasm.
"Cum for me, Mr. Munson," she whimpered, "fill my slutty cunt with your cum. Make me yours."
Eddie felt his eyes roll in the back of his head as he panted. His hand jerked himself faster, the feeling of bliss in his stomach. He read the last sentence over and over until his body thrashed as he came. His sticky cum painted his hand and stomach as he jerked himself empty. He imagined filling her cunt, and stuffing her full. The idea of his cum dripping down her thighs made him shiver.
He pulled his hand away with a hiss when he felt himself grow sensitive.
He took a few minutes to collect himself. Then the guilt rushed in. He slammed his laptop shut with his clean hand. He just jerked himself off to a student's smut. What the hell was wrong with him?
He got out of bed, legs a little shaky as he moved to his bathroom. He washed his hands and cleaned off his stomach. He couldn't look at himself in the mirror without disgust. He was an adult, he should have closed it the second he saw it was a sex story.
~~~
Eddie sat at his desk, his leg shook with anxiety as he waited for his class to come in.
His eyes looked up and caught hers. She offered a small smile as she walked in. He looked away and pretended to be busy with his desk work.
She tried to ignore the blow she felt as he ignored her. Maybe it was a hard morning for him. She walked over to Tate's table as they talked. Eddie noticed she wore a different skirt with a tighter-fitting top. He felt displeased with himself as he felt his cock get a little hard. He couldn't look at her without thinking of her words. And the disgusting thing he did while reading it.
"Y/N, please don't make me ask you to take your seat every day."
His tone was sharp and annoyed. Even Tate looked at him confused as Y/N blushed in embarrassment again.
"Sorry," she rushed out as she raced to her seat
"Don't say it, show me." He snapped
She shrunk in her seat, her eyes looked to Tate to see if they were thinking the same thing.
The whole class period he never once looked her way. Which was odd because he always looked over at her. Even when she raised her hand to answer all his questions, as she always did since she was the only one who listened to his lectures. He just ignored her and waited until someone else answered, even if it took minutes.
She couldn't help but feel neglected. It wasn't a big deal, but it made her feel like shit.
She sighed in relief as the class was dismissed. Tate walked over to her as the two began to walk out.
"Ms. Y/L/N? Can you stay back a second?" His voice called out
Y/N gulped and looked nervously at Tate. She sent a small smile and closed the door behind her. Leaving Eddie and Y/N alone in an empty classroom.
"Yes, Mr. Munson?" she asked, her voice shaking with nerves as she looked down at him.
He stood up and grabbed a stack of stapled papers from his desk. He looked into her eyes as he handed it over.
"Can you just read the first paragraph, please? To yourself is fine."
She took the paper, confused. But she did as he asked. The color drained from her face as she read the first few words. She sent in the wrong paper.
"I'm so-" she went to apologize but Eddie cut her off.
"This behavior is highly inappropriate. We discussed you would change your book. Not only is it against the school's rules, it is not appropriate to write about a teacher in that way. If you have a crush, write in a diary, not my assignment. And I'll need a new paper if you want to pass this class" His voice had no emotion as he scolded her. She wanted to shrink until he couldn't see her anymore. She was so embarrassed.
"I understand," she whispered with her head down, she would never be able to look him in the face again.
She kept the papers as she began to walk towards the door.
"Oh and Y/N?"
She turned around, her eyes on the floor.
"Even if this school doesn't have a dress code, I think you should dress more appropriately."
Any sort of confidence she ever had vanished with his words. She didn't say anything, she turned around and raced out the door.
Hot tears streaming down her face.
"What happened?" Tate asked as she held the crying girl in her arms.
"I sent in the wrong paper and now he knows I have this giant crush on him. You were wrong! He doesn't like me at all. And he wasn't checking me out, he was judging me for wearing slutty clothes!"
"He said that to you?" Tate gasped
"Not in those words, but he said if I had a crush I need to write it in my diary and not his assignments. Then he said I need to wear appropriate clothes in his class." Y/N cried as she hugged her best friend tighter.
"What a dick! He has no right to talk to you that way." Tate growled.
"Let's just get out of here," Y/N sighed as she let Tate go.
~~~
Y/N dreaded going to class the next day. She printed out the correct paper this time. Her head was low as she walked silently into the class, she dropped the paper on his desk. She didn't bother to look at him, no idea if he looked at her or not.
But of course, he looked. Her perfume alerted him that she was there before any movement did. He watched as the new papers landed on his desk and she walked silently to her seat. He eyed her outfit, completely different from anything she ever wore.
She was covered in clothes from head to toe. A big hoodie on her body with baggy sweatpants. He felt guilty seeing her body deflate in her seat. He knew he was wrong to ever say anything about what she wore but he couldn't handle seeing her in outfits he wanted to tear off. It didn't work, even in a hoodie and sweatpants he still imagined what was underneath.
The class seemed to go on for hours for both of them. She never looked up from her desk.
"Does anyone know the answer?" He asked out loud, his eyes already moving to her frame. He was met with silence.
"Do you happen to know, Y/N?"
She shrunk as he said her name, his and the whole class's eyes on her as she looked up.
"No, sorry" she whispered, barely loud enough for him to hear. It pained him to see her high head so low. She shined with confidence and he took it away for his own selfish reasons.
"Her hand wasn't raised, Sir," Tate growled. She wasn't sure what Eddie's problem was but she knew it wasn't because he disliked that paper.
"My apologies," Eddie said with a tight smile. He answered for the class as he continued his lecture.
He dismissed the class a few minutes early. Barely able to keep himself together. He watched as Tate wrapped her arm around Y/N's shoulder as they walked out.
~
Eddie spent the night grading Y/N's new paper. He wasn't surprised by the perfect story she told. He was glad he didn't destroy her writing ability like he did with everything else.
The next morning he placed the paper on her desk. The compliment left his lips as a routine.
"Excellent work,"
She gave a small hum as she didn't look up. No thank you or smile sent his way. He ignored the pit in his stomach as he moved on with the class.
"The next assignment will be with partners, so please find someone you are comfortable to work with."
Eddie gave the class time to find someone as he grabbed the rubric for the assignment. He figured he'd see Tate sitting up front next to Y/N when he looked up, but he felt a lump in his throat when he saw Alex sitting there.
Alex was a good student, he was dedicated and smart. Since when did he know her?
Eddie passed out the rubric, he tried not to eavesdrop on the conversations happening around him.
"We'll probably have to work outside of class, so maybe I can get your number and address?"
Eddie kept the growl in his throat as he walked past Alex and Y/N. He hated the way she smiled and nodded.
It was dumb but Eddie acted out of jealousy.
"You'll get weeks and weeks of in-class work time so don't worry about working out of school hours." A huge lie, he jeopardized his lesson plans and would deal with the consequences later.
"Bummer, I was kinda using that as an excuse to ask you out," Alex said, Eddie watched as she blushed and giggled into her hand.
He shouldn't be jealous. He knew that. He's the reason they can't even look at each other. He acted childish and was cold. He rejected her and embarrassed her, and fuck did he regret it. He regretted making the adult decision, he wished he caved. He wished he smashed his lips against hers and turned that story into reality.
"Maybe you don't need an excuse?" She shrugged with a smile. Alex was cute and he always caught her eye. Not the way Eddie did, but it was clear that would never happen. It was selfish, but maybe Alex could make her feel better about herself again.
Eddie gulped as she wrote down her number and passed it over.
~~~
Shortly after that, Alex and Y/N spent more time sitting next to each other in Eddie's class. He watched the class work together, his eyes kept shifting towards her. It had been a long week of no words shared between them. She still covered her body and kept her head down.
All she focused on was Alex. She kept her eyes on him and never once shifted to Eddie. But his eyes were always on her.
They kept laughing and she smacked his arms. He'd smile at her reaction and push to make her laugh harder.
"Please stay focused," Eddie demanded from his desk. His annoyed tone made Y/N finally look up. He stared at her as she didn't look away. He didn't move a muscle, he hoped if he stayed still she wouldn't look away.
"Sorry, we'll go back to the project," Alex said, Eddie growled as he spoke. Y/N snapped out of her daydream and smiled at Alex as they went back to their assignment.
"This Friday I'm throwing a party, and I would love to see you there. Maybe as my date?" Alex asked, he sent a warm smile her way as he held her hand.
She felt her heart race and smiled.
"I would love to."
~
Friday arrived faster than Eddie wanted. He knew he wasn't supposed to be upset that she was going on a date. He should have been happy for her, but all he felt was jealousy.
"Wow, wow and wow."
Eddie looked up as he heard Alex's voice. He looked in the direction of Alex's eyesight and felt his breath being kicked out of his lungs.
Y/N walked in with a huge smile, and a flowy black dress framed her body. She wore light makeup that made her face light up. Her confidence was back.
"You like? I was thinking of this for our date," Y/N said as she wrapped her arms around Alex's neck.
Eddie rolled his eyes as the couple leaned in for a kiss.
"Take your seats," Eddie demanded, and the couple pulled away.
"Sorry, Mr. Munson," she said, smiling as she took her seat and dragged Alex to sit next to her.
Eddie ignored the shiver her voice sent through his body. Hearing his name leave her lips sent Eddie into a spiral.
During the class, Eddie focused on not blowing up. His hands were in a tight fist, and his fingers were white. He clenched his jaw as Alex's hand rested on her bare knee.
He watched as Alex whispered in her ear. Eddie didn't what he said, but the way Y/N's eyes went huge and her mouth opened with a gasp, made him guess a few things. He watched as her thighs clenched together and Alex squeezed her knee before it traveled up her thigh. His hand went higher and higher until it disappeared underneath her dress.
The class was dismissed and Eddie couldn't hold it in anymore.
"Y/N, can I speak to you?"
Y/N and Alex stopped at the door
"Um, yeah," she said confused, Alex pecked her cheek goodbye as he walked out.
"Can you shut the door?"
Y/N was confused but closed the door, and then walked over to his desk.
"How can I help you?" she asked
"I'd appreciate it if you and your boyfriend kept your focus on the project and not each other," Eddie said he stood tall as he placed his hands on his desk and leaned forward.
"The project is finished, Mr. Munson. And we still have a few days before we turn it in. I don't think we are doing anything wrong." she argued. She was tired of him telling her what to do with her life.
"Him feeling you up underneath a table isn't doing anything wrong?" He argued, his eyes dark as he glared over at her. He leaned forward, even more, his face close to hers.
She tried to ignore the heat she felt between her thighs as he leaned over her with his tight shirt bulging out his arms. His tie dangled in between them as she looked up at him.
"And whispering in your ear? I'm sure I can think of a few things he had to say." Eddie said as he rolled his eyes
Y/N couldn't help but feel an exciting feeling bubble in her stomach, was he...jealous?
"What do you think he said?" she asked, as she leaned forward. Her voice was low as she looked into his eyes. She could see the lust in his eyes as he licked his lips.
"Something along the lines of wanting to be under your dress, between your legs, and make you scream his name," Eddie growled. He watched as she smirked, a tingle worked through his body.
"Was that his thoughts or yours, Mr. Munson?" She challenged.
"Pardon?" Eddie asked, his tone a little shocked as his eyes widened.
Y/N didn't back down, she placed her hands on his desk, mocking his posture, as she leaned forward.
"Nothing, it just seems you are kinda jealous? I mean you shouldn't be, right? Since you had me in the palm of your hand and sent me away." Her words sent more tingles down Eddie's body.
He chuckled in mockery as he bit his lip. He smelled her perfume, turning his brain into a puddle. His lips were inches away from hers, teasing him as they puckered.
"You'd like that, huh? You've got Alex, and still wondering about me? Shame for that poor boy."
"I think I would. He's cute and knows how to touch me. But he'll never be you, Mr. Munson." She confessed, the more she spoke, the closer they got. Their words went down to whispers.
Eddie felt that jealousy burning through him again at the thought of Alex touching her.
"You are jealous. I can see it," she smirked. Now she had him in the palm of her hand. She tossed all her fucks out the window as she grasped his tie in between her fingers. "So why don't you do something about it?"
Eddie took her challenge and ran with it. He knew there wasn't a single thought in his head that was going to send her walking away like last time.
He wanted to cave
He stood up, his tie falling through her fingers
She watched as he walked around the desk, but she didn't move. He walked over to the door, the sound of the lock turning as she waited.
She gasped when his hands landed on her hips, and he shoved her body against his. She loved the feeling of his hard chest and cock pressed against her.
He pushed aside her hair and pressed his lips against her neck. She moved her head to the side, giving him more room as she melted into his touch. His lips were hot and wet against her soft skin, he moved close to her ear, sucking on the skin right below it.
Eddie's hands trailed down her body and bunched up her dress. He removed his lips from her neck and pushed on her back. She took the hint and bent herself over his desk. He held her dress against her back with his left hand, she shivered when he yanked down her underwear with his right hand.
"Did you touch yourself when you wrote that story?" He asked, his right hand massaged her ass.
"Not immediately, but I did when I woke up." She confessed, her thoughts took her back to when she read it over and over as she fingered herself. No idea she sent it. "Did...did you?" She shyly asked, her eyes staring forward at the whiteboard.
She jolted forward when his right hand cracked down on her ass. She gripped the desk as she moaned when he cracked down a second time.
"I did," he admitted, she felt a smile spread across her face.
"Really?" She asked she turned her head to look at him. She purred in delight at the hungry look in his eyes as he stared at her ass, his hand massaging the skin gently as the skin burned.
"I read it when I woke up, soaked my boxers before I even got to touch myself. Quite the imagination you have, pretty girl."
She blushed when his eyes snapped up to hers. He gave her a cheeky smile.
"I came so hard, thinking of painting the inside of your pretty cunt." He reached up and unzipped her dress, she stood up so it fell at her feet. She kicked it aside and turned around.
She stood face to face with him, her body naked as she reached and unbuttoned his shirt. He sat back and let her strip him, he loved the feeling of her hands skimming down his chest as she worked his belt.
She dropped to her knees as she pulled down his dress pants and boxers. She licked her lips as she softly wrapped her hands around his cock. He moaned as her touch set him on fire.
She licked up his length then wrapped her mouth around his thick tip. He dug his hand into her hair as she forced him further down her throat. She kept taking him until she felt herself gagging around him. He praised her as he bucked his hips forward. She felt his tip hit the back of her throat, she didn't pull back until he did.
She panted as his cock left her mouth. He felt amazing in her throat and tasted better than she imagined. She couldn't help but grow even more excited as he waited to see what he felt like inside of her.
She raised to her feet and jumped on the desk, she spread her legs open and grabbed the tie that still rested around his neck. She yanked the tie as he smirked. He allowed her to drag him forward, his lips hungrily landing on hers. She moaned as his tongue easily slipped inside her mouth. Their tongues battled as he slipped two fingers inside of her.
He swallowed her moans as he fucked his fingers inside of her, stretching her out. She tried to keep up with the kiss but struggled as his fingers felt amazing inside of her.
Eddie pulled away but kept his fingers pumping inside of her.
"I knew you'd be tight," he moaned as he removed his fingers. She watched with heavy eyelids as he sucked his fingers clean.
"Just fuck me," she whined as she clawed at his chest.
He laughed at her eagerness, but he wasn't patient himself. He grabbed his cock and lined his tip with her entrance. She spread her lips open as he began to shove himself inside of her.
Her head was thrown back as he filled her completely, she felt herself being stretched by his length.
His eyes were lost as he stared at his cock moving inside of her. He watched as he pulled out, his cock soaked in her before he pushed himself back in. He loved how easily he slipped inside of her.
He wrapped her legs around his waist as he picked up his pace. All his pent-up aggression, regret, and jealousy flowed through him as he took it out on her.
She gasped and whined as his pace quickened. His skin smacked against hers, and she let her body fall back. Her body jolted and her breasts bounced with every thrust. His hands touched up and down her body. He touched every inch of skin he could reach. He loved watching as her eyes shut with bliss and her body gave into him.
"Fucking beautiful," he moaned as he leaned down to smash his lips on hers. Her brain spun as he fucked and kissed her all at once. His hands were soft as they skimmed down her stomach, goosebumps rising on her skin. Then his hand slipped between their bodies as he began to rub her clit. He removed his lips from hers to kiss down her chest, biting the skin.
"Fuck, Mr. Munson, getting close," she whimpered. She wasn't surprised by how fast her orgasm was approaching. Her body has never felt anything like this. His kiss, his touch, and his cock worked perfectly together to make her stomach burn.
Eddie had flashbacks to her paper, growling as he remembered the fire he felt when he read his name. And how she begged to be filled by him.
"Yeah? You wanna cum? Soak me in your cum?" He teased, his fingers moving faster against her clit as she shook beneath him.
"Please, please," she begged
Somehow his pace got faster and she could feel his balls slapping against her. It didn't take long for her to snap and the instant relief of an orgasm washed over her.
She reached up and gripped his neck as she came. She bit into his shoulder to silence her screams.
Eddie hissed as her teeth sunk into his skin but he loved it. He hoped it left a mark and he could see it every morning before she came into class.
"Good girl," he praised softly into her hair, he gently removed his fingers from her clit. Careful to not make her too sensitive as he chased his orgasm.
"Fill me up, Mr. Munson," she whispered heavily into his ear. Her hands tugged on his hair. His hot lips landed on her neck as he silenced his own moans and growls as he emptied himself inside of her.
He gave a few final thrusts as he pushed his cum inside of her. He breathed heavily as he slipped out of her. He slipped his arms around her body as he pressed her against him.
She panted and waited for the air to return to her lungs before she pulled away.
"Yeah, you definitely read it." She joked as she let out a breathless laugh.
He chucked with her and pecked her shoulders and neck. His kisses moved up and all around her face.
He stepped back and grabbed her dress, he helped her get it on as she slipped off the desk with wobbly legs. He turned her around as he zipped the dress, kissing her spine until the material covered the skin.
She turned the favor and helped him get dressed. He was fully clothed and she noticed her cunt was still bare.
"Where is my underwear?" She chuckled as she looked around the classroom floor.
"Right here," Eddie teased as he waved it in the air. She rolled her eyes and tried to grab it but he raised it over their heads.
"Nah uh, I think I'm going to keep this." He said as he slipped her underwear into his back pocket. The sight itself made her cunt pulse. "I think you should walk out of here with my cum dripping down those thighs as you tell little Alex that date is no longer happening." His voice was deep and dark as he wrapped his hand around her neck.
She turned submissive all over again under his touch. She nodded without a single thought. He smiled and pecked her lips, slowly pulling away so she'd chase his lips.
She pouted when his touch left her completely and he grabbed paper and a pen from his desk. She watched as he scribbled something down.
"This is my number and address, I'll see you tonight, don't bother dressing up. It'll be on my bedroom floor, anyway." He winked as he slipped the paper into her hand.
She sat shocked as he smirked unlocked the door and walked out.
But she couldn't help the huge smile across her face when she saw her underwear peeking out from his pocket.
Tumblr media
Tags!
@bmunson86 @mxcheese @ladymunson @michaelfuckinglangdon @z0mbie-blah @biittersweet @mirrorsstuff @somethingvicked @micheledawn1975 @ago-godance @magnificantmermaid @tlclick73 @hargrovesswifee @cityofidek @silky-luxe @lokiofasgard616 @loving-and-dreaming @eddiemunsonsbitch69 @thegemaqua @ashlynnkennedy @strangerthingsstories5255 @harringt8ns @pleasinghellfire @whoscamila @stusdollface93 @gretavankleep37 @bellaisswagger @arlxt
639 notes · View notes
dovveri · 3 months ago
Text
strangers
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
synopsis: trainee life is a lot tougher than you thought, but with three other trainees you met along the way, you have a little more hope that it’ll all be worth it in the end.
warnings: bad eating habits, mentions of vomiting and self-induced vomiting, swearing, suggestive, TOE-SUCKING, alcohol and parties, lots of feelings and trainee life angst
w/c: 19.2k !!!!! why is this like half of my entire bachelorette series jeezus
a/n: requested!! i actually dont fill reqs this quick but i had the idea alr and i lwk love writing poly i just think its so much messier and more confusing and FUN so writing this came a lot easier than writing other reqs do. also u lwk only have to read half of this and be happy yippee happily ever after OR u can potentially hurt urself and enjoy the angst but idk it’s not THAT bad so 🤗
𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ⋅ᡣ𐭩 ་༘࿐
“y/n?”
you blink, tilting your head up from your hiding spot under the table in the recording studio. it’s nayeon, one of the korean trainees. you hurriedly wipe your eyes on your sleeve, stumbling upwards and almost knocking your head on the bottom of the table.
“s-sorry. were you using this room? i’ll get out now-“
“no no! it’s okay i was just going to get some practice in and i saw you. are you… are you okay?” you appreciate her speaking slower for you, your grasp of korean still wasn’t the best.
“y-yeah i’m fine. i’ll just- leave you to it- sorry again-“
“are you sure? today’s actually my day off so i don’t have to be doing anything. i’m happy to just listen if you want…?”
you gulp, avoiding her gaze, nayeon was one of the trainees that everyone knew would most likely make it. you didn’t see much of her because she was always off on side jobs filming as a background dancer for music videos, booking small modelling gigs, and she was generally in more advanced classes than yours and was even set to debut in a group with a few others before the idea was scrapped. she was steadily making a name for herself even before the public knew her, something you couldn’t help but be envious of. but here she was, offering to listen to you of all people.
“i- um-“
“it’s okay. you can take your time.” she smiles sweetly, “i tried to take a few english classes but it’s a lot more difficult than i thought it’d be. so i can understand how hard it must be to come to a different country and learn a whole new language.”
“t-thank you. i was just um- i was actually just thinking about calling home and… and quitting.”
she nods, eyes filled with empathy, waiting for you to continue.
“i just- don’t think i can make it. there’s so many talented people here and this has always been my dream but i’m just not good enough and i don’t even- it doesn’t even make sense for me to be here when i could be back home getting an education or i don’t know- doing something with my life.”
“you don’t think what you’re doing now is something?”
you sigh, gripping your arm firmly, "it- it is but i don't know if it's all going to work out in the end."
"and you think going back home and going to school will guarantee things working out for you?"
"well- i- no, not for certain but-"
"so isn't the only difference that you actually want to do this? you don't want to end up working an office job for the rest of your life right?"
"but- like i'm more likely to get an office job than i am to debut-"
"i'm sure the office jobs will wait for you. idol life won't. if you don't make it, then the office job will always be there right? it's up to you though, i'm not trying to convince you to stay or leave, i just think it's a shame when you have a real chance at getting what you've dreamt of your whole life. you were scouted weren't you? did you know i auditioned to get in? and i had to hide it from my family because they didn't think this was a realistic job prospect, not when i was still in high school. so if you think you don't belong here, just remember you beat out other auditionees to get your spot as a trainee here, so you were good enough for that." she smiles brightly, her two protruding front teeth proudly on display, giving her the adorable likeability to a rabbit.
her words bring you back from the edge of panic, you've always looked at her through a lens of jealousy, wishing you had as much natural talent and star power as she did, but right now, you could see she was so much more than that, and you respected her for it, admired her for it.
"thank you nayeon." you finally meet the older girl's eyes, and her smile grows even brighter.
"of course. do you have any training schedules to get to right now? or do you want to stay here and practice some vocal chords with me?"
"would that be okay?" your eyes widen at her offer.
"yes! don't be silly y/n i know we're all meant to be competing or whatever but we're most likely going to debut in a group right? we can't just be out for each other's throats all the time."
you smile, finding her attitude refreshing, most of the trainees you had met were exactly like that, and you felt even more isolated when it was obvious they made no effort to get to know you because of the language barrier, to them, it was just another advantage they had over you.
"c'mon. let's see what you got."
your motivation reinvigorated, you spend the rest of the afternoon cooped up in the recording studio with nayeon, practicing together but also joking around and laughing, being the kids you were in an industry that stripped you of that freedom.
𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ⋅ᡣ𐭩 ་༘࿐
"これの読み方を知っていますか?"
"いいえ、私は愚かです."
you shuffle uncomfortably in your seat, unable to shake the insecurity that they were talking about you. you were currently in your intensive korean class, waiting for the teacher to appear. the class was mostly quiet, except for the two girls sitting a table away from you, whispering and laughing, pushing each other around playfully.
when you glance towards them again, one of them meets your eye. you panic, whipping your head back down to your open textbook.
the girl who saw you whispers something to her seatmate, nodding towards you, bringing the other girl's attention to you as well.
you strain to see what they're doing in your peripheral vision, but the little giggles and whispers have you shrinking in even more on yourself, thinking they were making fun of you for whatever reason.
you don't notice when the one who spotted you first is suddenly standing next to you. she waits for you to acknowledge her, but when you don't she giggles again, leaning down and tilting her head so you had to look at her.
"hi. my name sana. you?"
"y-y/n."
"y/n? nice to meet you! that momo." she steps back a little and points at the other girl who waves shyly at you. you stare back at her, dumbfounded, reciprocating her wave.
"you... korean good?"
you blink, unsure of what to say, "umm... it's okay i guess."
sana grins, all teeth, almost blinding you, running back to her seat and picking up her textbook, skipping back towards you and plopping down in the empty seat next to you. she points at the page, "how to do?"
you look down to the question she has circled, it was part of the homework set from the last lesson. you flick back to that page in your own textbook, showing her and trying to explain with gestures what it was asking.
when it clicks, that blinding smile graces her features again, her eyes lighting up and quickly scribbling down the answer. then she turns to momo who seemed to be doodling little drawings all over her workbook instead of studying.
"モモリ馬鹿野郎 ! これがあなたのやり方です."
you shrink back into your seat, thinking she was done with you, only needing you to help her with her homework, and now that she was done, she could go back to making fun of you.
but instead, momo looks over curiously, standing up and hovering over the two of you. sana starts talking in rapid japanese, her hands flailing around excitedly.
momo nods along, and then she seems to get a moment of realisation, her eyebrows raising and mouth opening in the shape of an o, an "ahh!" escaping her.
sana looks back to you, "thank you! you so smart!"
you still don't really follow their conversation but you nod, shyly rubbing the back of your neck, "it's okay."
"we sit here?"
"sorry?"
sana frowns, an adorable pout forming on her lips, thinking over how to say what she wants. then she grabs momo's hand, gesturing between the both of them, "friends!", then she grabs your hand, gesturing between the three of you now, "friends?"
your hand is sweaty against sana's, you take note of how soft it feels against yours, heart stumbling a little over itself. you nod sheepishly, not expecting sana to grin, pulling you into a hug immediately.
momo goes to grab her things, and then settles into the seat on your other side, "sorry for her. she very huggy."
sana pouts, flicking momo's forehead playfully after she pulls away from you, "you like it too."
momo giggles, rolling her eyes.
things were moving so fast your brain was playing catch up. you knew the people here were a lot more affectionate than back home, but you still felt your heart racing from being in such close proximity with sana, and now momo too, the both of them squeezed against you and conversing lightly in broken korean and japanese while waiting for the teacher. it wasn't unwelcome though, this was the first time someone had asked you in such a straightforward way to become friends, it was refreshing, definitely better than the trainees in your vocal and dance classes who refused to interact with you at all.
when the teacher finally comes, he looks a little surprised at the change in seating, but doesn't comment on it, diving straight into the lesson.
sana and momo both try their best to keep up, sana remains fully engaged in the lesson, asking plenty of questions, while momo is the opposite. she's easily distracted, when the teacher goes on one of his off topic rants, she starts doodling in her textbook again, you repress a laugh at the stick men she drew frolicking around in fields with rainbows and stars. you can't help yourself but bring your pen to her page, adding a little deranged dog to her drawing.
she looks at you in surprise, but lets you finish, giggling at the result and drawing in some fur for the dog, fixing up your sorry attempt at a puppy.
the class finishes uneventfully after that. momo yawns, closing her book with relief while sana stretches, standing up and grinning down at the both of you.
momo looks at her warily, squinting, "what?"
"what?"
"you have not good look on your face. what you do?"
"what do you mean momoring?" sana's grin only grows wider.
"i don't want to get in trouble again."
"you woooon't. what you think y/n? want to sneak out get fried chicken and beer?"
momo groans, slumping down on her desk, muttering to herself in japanese while sana laughs at her reaction.
you look between the both of them, raising an eyebrow. you knew you shouldn't, but you hadn't had real food in so long, the company's strict diet and weight requirements always on all of your minds. and you hadn't really gone out and explored korea since you arrived. you'd pretty much been confined to the dorms and the company building, eating cafeteria food and living the same routine everyday, you knew the korean trainees would often get together after late night practices and have small gatherings the company wouldn't know about, but you were never invited to those.
you grin cheekily, "you have a plan?"
sana laughs, pulling you up to stand, hugging you once again in glee, "yay!! i knew we good friends! of course, it's not the first time momoring and i have snuck out." she pulls away with a wink.
momo grumbles behind you, slowly standing up as well, "last time you got us caught you said we were helping 'clean the streets'. stupid. we had extra exercise requirements for two weeks."
"we won't get caught this time! i promise! and if we do i pay for all our food."
momo perks up at that, eyeing sana, then holding out her pinky.
sana giggles, linking their pinkies and then dragging momo by their pinkies, and you by your hand out of the classroom and back towards the dorms to get ready.
𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ⋅ᡣ𐭩 ་༘࿐
"sana- move!" momo grunts, shuffling around in clothes too big for her, a cap that dipped over her eyes, and a mask to hide her face.
"shh! you're gonna get us caught!"
"no you are!"
"okay they're gone let's go." sana slinks forward in similar attire, careful to avoid the security cameras, flapping a sleeve behind her frantically to gesture the both of you to follow. momo glances at you, rolling her eyes but smiling, tiptoeing forward and following sana.
you're body is surging with adrenaline. you had always been a 'good' kid. you've never tried sneaking out of anywhere before. you were also trying to hold in your laughter at how stupid the three of you must look, the sunglasses covering your eyes while indoors and at 9pm at night glazing your vision.
you make it halfway across the main entrance, almost to the exit, hands shoved in your pockets.
"... y/n?"
you pause, heart pounding. the two in front of you stop as well, sana looks back at you in alarm.
you decide the best course of action is to pretend you didn't hear them. after all, they couldn't be sure you were yourself right now right? the absurd disguises made sure of that. you take another step forward.
"y/n what are you wearing? you look like vector from despicable me."
curse sana for lending you that naruto cosplay. you forgot how visible your disguise was.
you turn on your heel slowly, terribly embarrassed to have been discovered like this, mind scrambling to come up with an excuse for what the three of you were doing.
but you're stopped in your tracks when you realise who was teasing you with a wide grin, two front teeth on display. she laughs when she finally sees you, it's loud and bright, it'd scare you away if you hadn't already heard it plenty of times from her when she had found you in the practice room that day.
"you look so stupid. wait-" she whips out her phone, and before you can protest, she snaps a quick picture, laughing at her phone after checking the result.
"nayeonn!"
"i can't believe you tried to sneak out wearing that."
you pout, crossing your arms protectively over yourself, "i wasn't trying to sneak out!"
she raises an eyebrow, "yeah and i'm not gorgeous." she jokes sarcastically, before peeking over your shoulder and nodding behind you, "and who are those two losers behind you?"
you turn, taking off your ridiculous sunglasses and waving to let them know you were fine and to join you. sana tilts her head curiously, moving back towards you, tugging along momo who takes off her cap, blowing her hair out of her face.
"oh! you're the japanese duo that came here on the same day! i'm sorry i don't remember your names but i saw you dance and you were incredible." she directs the last part at momo, who blushes at the compliment, nodding and hiding behind her hair. sana grins though, bowing down and bringing momo down with her.
"i'm sana! this is momo!"
"nayeon. it's nice to meet you both." nayeon smiles sweetly, bowing as well and gesturing for them to stand up. "where were you guys headed?"
"chicken and beer! you want to come?" sana quips happily, excited to meet anyone new.
"how were you guys going to get beer?" nayeon jokes with a smirk.
sana tilts her head confusedly, she looks adorable in the clothes that drown her.
"you're all underage right?"
sana looks to you in confusion, not seeming to understand what underage meant.
"ah- none of us are 18..." you gesture to the three of you.
sana makes a sound of exclamation, not having thought about that particular detail.
nayeon laughs brightly, finding the japanese girl's antiques endearing. "good thing you have me then! c'mon. i know the best place as well, and no one from the company will go around there so we won't get caught." she winks, pulling a mask and cap out of her jacket pocket and slipping it on.
you blink, surprised at the change in events.
nayeon shrugs, "always gotta be ready if we're training to be idols right?" you can see the smirk in her eyes, before she charges forward without an answer and leads the four of you into the night.
𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ⋅ᡣ𐭩 ་༘࿐
your shoulder hurt.
there's another bout of laughter, you flinch, preparing yourself.
sure enough, nayeon's large hands come clapping down on your arm, you wince, trying to smile your way through the sting of each slap.
it doesn't help when sana realises why you look constipated, cracking up even more pointing at you with a hand over her mouth, which makes nayeon laugh again for absolutely no other reason than that you were all wasted.
"nayeonnie calm down- you're going to kill y/n-" sana chokes out between giggles.
nayeon blinks, looking at you, face brightly flushed. she pouts, leaning in close, "what did i do?"
you flush even brighter, blaming the alcohol and not the way nayeon's eyes are glued to your lips, squinting and trying to focus on one part of your face only with her wobbly vision. you push her off of you gently, rubbing at your shoulder with a grimace, "you hit people when you're drunk.""
nayeon coos, chasing after you, "awwwwwh did i hurt you? poor baby. here lemme kiss it better." nayeon purses her lips together, pushing her face towards you while you whine and laugh, trying to push her away.
sana pipes up at the word, "kiss? who are we kissing? i wanna kiss!"
momo snorts, playing around with the bottle cap of the soju you had gotten to after you had all decided the beer wasn't enough. her face is probably the most flushed of you all, but she was also probably the most sane of you all currently. "don't you kiss enough?"
sana whines, poking momo's cheek, "no! you don't let me! c'mere-" she leans forward, tickling momo's sides, trying to get her to let her defenses down and land one on her. momo laughs, pushing sana off, scrambling away in urgency.
you aren't faring much better, but then you get an idea, "sanaaa! kiss nayeon! she's trying to get me!"
sana turns to you both, and she's never one to turn down a kiss so she leans across the table, yanking nayeon's head towards her and pulling her away from you. but what surprises you is when she plants a sloppy kiss right on the eldest's lips.
you look at momo, expecting to see a similar look reflected, but she rolls her eyes, calmly picking up the bottle and bringing it to her lips again to take a sip.
they break away with a smack, exaggerated on sana's end who giggles and licks her lips, grabbing the bottle from momo and taking a sip as well.
nayeon blinks, her brain seeming to catch up with her body 2 seconds late. when she realises what happens, she stands up abruptly with a screech, her metal chair scraping against the floor in pain. you wince at the sound, but laugh when you catch her face, now brighter than momo's, hand over her mouth in shock. sana and momo easily join you, cackling as nayeon flails around, sounds coming out of her mouth in incoherent phrases.
it seems the shop owner has had enough of the four of you though.
"yah! out! all of you! bedtime! 2am now! go go!" you all continue laughing as you're ushered out of your seats. you're all too drunk to notice the way the shop owner has fondly been watching you for the last few hours, cleaning around and keeping her shop open later than she normally opens, recalling the days she was young and stupid as well. she shouts at you while she pushes you out the door, but she also shoves a plastic bag of takeaway chicken into your hands as she pushes you out, telling you all to go home and not to cause too much trouble at this time of night.
you all laugh and thank her, sana even goes to kiss her cheek, cooing at how adorable she was in her apron and wrinkles.
when you've finally calmed down and take in the chill air of the night sky, you shiver a little, the alcohol sloshing around in your body not enough to keep you warm.
momo sidles up next to you, linking your hands together easily and pulling you against her.
you grin at her, tightening your grip around her hand that she's shoved into the warm pocket of her jacket pocket.
the peace is quickly disrupted when nayeon sends a stumbled kick your way from behind you. she misses though, tripping over herself and almost falling face-flat onto the ground save for sana hooking onto her waist quickly, pulling her back up with a laugh.
nayeon wraps an arm around sana's shoulder, thanking her for the support. "yah. you two. kiss. i can't be the only one who had to kiss someone today."
sana pouts, "why do you say that like you didn't like it?"
nayeon sputters, squinting up at sana from her slouched position, her weight almost entirely leaning on sana, "no i didn't- i didn't mean it like- no but- ugh-"
sana giggles, shuffling around so she can accommodate nayeon better.
momo turns her head, "no way loser. you two only kissed because you're both so kissy."
"what does that even mean?!"
"sana kisses everyone when she's drunk. and you're just as bad nayeon. i don't know how you can go drinking with just one person. you need at least 2 or 3 to hold you up when you get drunk." momo teases, sticking out her tongue.
"respect your elders you little shit!"
you all laugh at that, nayeon may have gotten you all drinks but she wasn't that much older than you. and she looks hilarious bringing a fist up in the air and waving it around like a little angry old lady, too much spite in too little a body, it was cute.
"wait... so the only one i haven't kissed yet is y/n?"
you freeze, ready to make a run for it at the earliest sign of danger.
nayeon grins, pushing sana off of her and towards you, "let's change that!"
your eyes widen, legs tensing up, ready to rush forward, you pull your intertwined hands out of momo's pocket. but right as you're about to take off, momo smirks, yanking you backwards and spinning you around until you're met with the soft, ready lips sana has wating for you.
"mmf-!"
your eyes are squeezed shut when momo spun you, terrified of falling onto your face, but now all you can feel is her hand still holding yours, sana's coming up to steady your hips, her lips pressing against yours gently.
all too quickly, she breaks away with a giggle, licking her lips again. it must be a habit.
you stare at her dumbly, mouth hanging open, lips tingling with the faint taste of strawberry soju.
nayeon has ended up on the floor without anyone supporting her, cackling loudly and pointing at your dumbfounded look.
momo stifles a few chuckles as well, her hand still wrapped tightly around yours.
sana simply smiles, closing your mouth with her hand, brushing a thumb over your jaw in the process, then tucking a strand of hair behind your ear.
you flush up immediately, whipping around and staring at the floor, the tips of your ears bright red.
sana laughs, cooing, "awwwwh! you're so cute! look at her guys! she's blushing!"
"no!" you speak up indignantly, voice squeaky, "i'm just drunk!"
"you're more red than me!" momo joins in, trying to get a look at your face better with a laugh, her nose scrunching up in glee.
you whine, trying to pull away from her, but she doesn't let your hand go, so you end up pulling her along with you as you stomp forward, eager to get home and away from your teasing new friends.
sana laughs, running after you both.
that left nayeon, still on the floor in the middle of the street at 3am. "guys! hey guys! don't forget me! come back! hey- wait!"
𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ⋅ᡣ𐭩 ་༘࿐
the four of you grow easily close after that night. and it helps that by chance, you're all allocated into the same dorm room for the new year. it's definitely a surprise since nayeon was one of the company's top trainees, and the rest of you were foreigners and had only been around for about 2 months. you'd heard it was meant to help the three of you get better at korean, having to converse in korean daily with a korean roommate so that existing friends like sana and momo couldn't get away with just talking in japanese when they were in the comfort of their dorms. plus, it seemed both sana and momo were making a name for themselves amongst the trainees as well for their bubbly idol personality and raw talent respectively.
"how's this?" nayeon comes out of the bathroom and does a little twirl, her hair already curled and makeup applied dazzlingly. she's wearing a pretty silk white dress with little blue bows decorating it, matching the blue ribbons she's used in her hair.
sana squeals, immediately bounding upwards and poking at her. "it's so cute! when did you get this?!"
"the last family trip i went on! are you sure it's okay?" nayeon pouts.
but then momo yells out from behind her, still doing her eyeliner in your shared bathroom mirror, "you look fine stop digging for compliments."
sana laughs cheerily when nayeon sputters back at her, latching onto the older girl and pecking her cheek, "it's okay nayeonnie i don't mind. i'll praise you anytime you want." there's a slight lilt to her voice, she finishes with a wink.
nayeon blushes immediately, but tries to cover for it by turning to you. "y/n? what do you think?"
you roll your eyes from your spot on sana's bed, more focused on applying the dark blue nail polish on your hands. "it's pretty."
"just pretty?" you can hear the pout in her voice.
you sigh exasperatedly, looking up at her in mock annoyance. "you're gorgeous, beautiful, stunning, exquisite, glamorous, everyone at the party will have their eyes on you."
you can hear momo fake gag from the bathroom, and sana bursting into giggles. but nayeon crosses her arms, frowning, "you see when you list it out like that it makes it a little harder to believe."
"ugh nayeon! you look good! what more do you want from me!"
she laughs, leaning down to squish your cheeks together affectionately, "thanks darling, i love my little thesaurus."
you grumble, careful not to get the drying nail polish onto sana's sheets. sana comes back to her position next to you, grabbing your hands and starting to blow on your fingers.
"what time does the party start again?" momo yells out from the bathroom, slipping into her outfit for the night.
"like... 10 minutes ago but it's fine. no one interesting is gonna get there on time." nayeon squeezes in next to you as well, leaning her head on your shoulder.
"that's because you're only interested in yourself."
"hey! i can revoke my invite to all of you!"
"you wanted us to go because you'd be, quote, bored out of your mind with all those mindless prepubescent boys trying to get in your pants! besides, we all got our own invites anyway."
"what?! why didn't you tell me?!"
"you were so cute thinking you were doing us all a solid or something for inviting us." sana speaks up with a giggle, "we couldn't break that!"
"you couldn't sana! i wanted to tell her and shove it up her proud ass but you just love to watch cute girls fumble around don't you?"
sana giggles again, going back to blowing on your nails.
but then momo steps out of the bathroom, clad in a very short bodycon dress, her makeup and hair fully done, the dress cutting open at her midriff showing off toned abs, pretty gold necklace decorating her neck, outlining her collarbones and the plunging neckline that pretty much ended at her belly button, tying together the cutout.
the three of you all stare at her, eyes roaming over the mass of skin, mouths open in... shock.
sana licks her lips slowly, eyes not bothering to meet her best friend's again, "you look... good."
momo smirks, imitating what's meant to be nayeon, "just good?"
nayeon bristles then, snapping out of her stupor, "shut up momo. don't you think you're... showing a bit too much skin?"
momo starts looking around for her shoes, bending over criminally with her back to you all, it's almost comedic how all three of your gazes lock onto her ass immediately. "this is nothing compared to some of the outfits they put us in when we do our showcases. besides, it's not like you can talk." she snorts, turning back around with heels in hand, her smirk never leaving her face as she watches the three of you, knowing exactly what you were doing.
"yeah but you'll... get cold."
"it's an indoor party."
"shut up!"
she laughs, standing back up after slipping into her shoes, "okay! ready to go?"
you gulp, standing up shakily, forcing you to look at her face and not ogle your friend's very attractive body. "y-yeah. took you all long enough."
"you finished practice earlier than us, you had more time to get ready. now let's go losers."
she leads the charge out your tiny shared room, nayeon gets up and follows grumpily. you look back down to sana who's still got her gaze locked on the way both girls' hips sway with each step. you roll your eyes, poking sana and dragging her up with a laugh. sana lets you, her brain short-circuiting, only able to be tugged along.
𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ⋅ᡣ𐭩 ་༘࿐
you honestly had no idea how a party of this scale went unnoticed by the company. there were so many trainees you recognised, and even a few idols that were lesser known to the public. it was at someone's house, you don't remember who's, but there was no way you could've gotten away with a party this size back at the dorms.
music was blasting, drinks were being circulated, people were dancing and grinding up against each other. it wasn't a surprise to see the amount of rowdiness going on, that's what happened when you force a bunch of teenagers to undergo strict training and diet regimes, and forbid anything that could get anyone into any sorts of controversies in the future in case you made it and got famous.
the four of you had naturally split up when you arrived, being pulled away by different friends and people wanting to greet you. you spot momo on the dance floor already, not that it was difficult to seperate her from everyone else. sure you were all trainees and went through mandatory dance class, but everyone knew momo was something else when it came to dance. she had an aura about her, one that made people back up and give her space, circling her on the crowded floor and watching in awe of her moves.
you can hear nayeon before you spot her. she's with jihyo and jeongyeon, two other trainees that she was set to debut with, and granted, was naturally close with. they were all top-notch trainees at the company, everyone knew of them, knew that the next group coming out of jyp would most likely include the three of them.
that left sana, someone people naturally gravitated towards. her adorable happy-go-lucky energy was infectious, it was impossible not to fall in love with her at first sight. she was currently surrounded by a crowd of people, laughing and smiling, face tinged with the pink of alcohol.
eventually, someone gets people together for a game of spin the bottle. you're all sitting in a big circle in a room away from the rest of the party, chattering excitedly with the buzz of liquors, an empty soju bottle laying in the middle of you all.
"okay party people! game time!" the original host of the party, jackson wang, saunters in with a charming grin, plopping himself down between mark and jeongyeon. "so i'm gonna assume we all know how spin the bottle works. and if you don't... well you'll find out! who wants to go first!"
everyone looks around at everyone, antsy, unwilling to go first. jackson rolls his eyes, "alright losers. guess it's me." he bends forward and spins the bottle. everyone watches with anticipation, breaths held.
it lands on one of the younger trainees, ryujin. she makes a face of disgust, cringing, but jackson ignores it, quickly swooping in and kissing her.
when they break away, ryujin quickly downs her cup of whatever concoction of alcohol she has, wiping at her lips and pushing him off of her playfully. jackson laughs, backing away and returning to his seat. ryujin goes forward, places her fingers on the bottle, then spins it.
again, you all wait in anticipation, eyes locked on the dizzying movement, until it slowly lands on bambam.
ryujin groans again, bambam looks like he just won the lottery. "nope! i'm not kissing one of you gross guys again, jackson tasted like he doesn't know what a toothbrush is. gimme a dare."
there are shouts of disapproval, but ryujin ignores them all, sitting on her haunches, unmoving.
"okay just because you made that totally untrue comment about my breath, i'll give you one worse than kissing bam." jackson looks around the room, thinking to himself, mark whispers something in his ear and they both snicker, "alright. suck someone's toes for 10 seconds."
"pfft is that meant to be a dare?" ryujin easily leans forward, pulling yeji's sock off and immediately wrapping her lips around her toe. yeji squeals, trying to pull her foot away but ryujin is persistent amongst everyone's hollering and cheering, counting down the seconds.
she finally breaks away with a laugh, making a show of licking her lips while yeji blushes, yelling at her and slapping her arm, shoving her drink into her hand and making her rinse out her mouth.
bambam shyly goes forward next, he spins the bottle, and it lands on nayeon. his eyebrows almost get lost in his hairline with how far up they go, his head shooting up and looking at nayeon who was leaning on jihyo heavily, still laughing at the whole ryujin-yeji situation.
his boys clap him on the back with a cheer, pushing him forward towards the older girl. nayeon blinks, turning her attention to him, realising he had spun her.
her eyes meet yours for a second, and then they flit around the room, landing on sana and momo respectively, it's so quick you wouldn't have noticed if you weren't already locked on her gaze.
bambam moves forward shyly, kneeling in front of her, unsure of what to do. she leans back a little as he comes closer, putting on an encouraging smile, looking up at him.
he takes a breath, then dives down, you can hear their teeth clacking as he accidentally goes in too aggressively, nayeon cringes, but tries to make up for it by tilting her head, pressing her lips against his, trying to urge him to slow down, but bambam moves almost too eagerly, like he's eating her up. in the end, nayeon has to gently push him off of her to get him to stop, he looks dazed as he collapses back in his spot, bright blush on his face all the way down to his neck. nayeon tries to look polite and laughs it off, moving forward and quickly spinning the bottle to move everyone along.
only for it land on momo.
"oh hell no." they both say simultaneously, blushing furiously and gaping at each other from across the circle. you catch sana's eye, supressing a laugh as you look between the two of them.
"dare! i pick dare!"
sana perks up, taking the opportunity immediately, "okay i dare you to kiss momo!"
the boys around the circle all laugh, agreeing with her energetically, starting up a chant. momo sends a death glare towards sana, who just sticks out her tongue at her, making an exaggerated kissy face mimicking momo and nayeon kissing.
with no choice, nayeon shuffles forward, crouching down in front of momo who can't look her in the eye.
"don't fall in love with me or anything hirai."
that gets momo to snort, meeting nayeon's equally nervous gaze, "as if i'll be able to think about anything other than getting rid of the taste of you-" she's cut off, nayeon leaning down to plant her lips on her in haste.
momo blinks at first in confusion, then she's closing her eyes and circling a hand around nayeon's neck, pulling her in just a little closer and returning the kiss. they ignore the roar of the crowd, nayeon thinks to herself how much better momo's lips felt against her own than bambam's teeth did.
that thought quickly rips her away though, scrambling backwards and wiping at her lips in mock disgust, laughing breathily with a pretty blush adorning her face.
momo looks on after her, her expression unreadable. after things settle down again, momo leans forward, spinning the bottle.
sana doesn't even give anyone the chance to think, sliding forward and into momo's lap, cupping her cheek and bringing their lips together. momo reacts automatically, hands circling sana's hips and slotting them together, like they've done this countless times in the past.
watching nayeon and momo kiss was silly, fun, but this, this was something different. you glance at nayeon, who has a hand at her lips, staring at sana and momo make out in front of everyone, eyebrows furrowed slightly. you look back, swearing you can see the hint of a pink tongue poke out from sana, momo's hands tightening around the other girl's hips in reaction, before sana finally breaks away. she stands up, sauntering back to her spot with a proud grin, people are cheering, throwing confetti, bowing down to her as if she just brought rain down in a drought. she thrives in the attention. momo on the other hand is breathing heavily, expression shielded behind her hair, biting her lip and clenching her thighs together.
sana does a round around the inside of the circle, giggling and skipping along in her little pink slip. she finally arrives back to her original spot, bending down and spinning the bottle.
it lands on one of the younger trainees, dahyun. sana smiles sweetly, crawling forward. she whispers a few words to dahyun, who nods shyly, breath picking up, then sana leans in, just pecking her before pulling away again. nothing like the kiss she shared with momo.
you decide you need a drink.
at this point in the night, the kitchen is thankfully much less chaotic. most people are playing the game, on the dance floor, or passed out around the house.
you spoon a ladle of the jungle juice that probably has ludicrous amounts of liquor in it into your cup, gulping it down thirstily. you don't know why you suddenly felt so stifled in that room, feeling hot even in the little cropped top and skirt you're wearing.
"y/n?"
you turn, of course it's your three roommates, all looking very concerned for you.
"hey. you okay?" sana comes up to you first, cupping your cheeks, placing the back of her hand on the front of your forehead.
you wave her off with a chuckle, "yeah i'm fine guys. why did you leave the game?"
"because you left." momo says simply, taking the cup you're still holding in your hand away from you, sniffing the contents.
"you didn't have to do that. i was just taking a water break."
"riiiight. water." momo raises an eyebrow unimpressively, pouring the rest of your drink down the sink nearby.
"i'm fine though seriously! you guys should get back to the game."
"you're not coming?" sana pouts.
"not really feeling it anymore."
"do you wanna go home?" nayeon speaks up then, coming forward to lean on sana's back, her face resting on sana's shoulder, looking up at you with wide eyes.
"what? no! you guys have fun. seriously, stop worrying about me i'm fine!"
"we can't have fun without you."
"i'm sure you can."
"no. we're not the four of us without you. we're just... the three of us." sana tilts her head like a confused puppy, her proximity to you making you dizzy, you're not sure if it's the alcohol, or the fact that she was so close, but you can only focus on her lips, which then remind you of the way her lips had been on momo's lips, that had been on nayeon's lips. yeah you were definitely a little more than dizzy.
"wooahh- too much to drink i think." momo sidles up next to you, catching your waist, and holding you up against her. she jokes, "didn't think you'd be the same kinda drunk as nayeon y/n. i don't know if we have enough personnel to take care of the both of you."
you groan, pushing yourself back onto your own two feet, leaning back against the kitchen bench, "don't compare me to that trainwreck."
"hey!"
you all laugh, sana's hands coming down to squeeze nayeon's that are around her waist, turning to peck her cheek.
"i'm getting tired anyway. let's go home."
"what? guys no- you don't have to do this for me- you can stay-"
"we're not doing this for you idiot. i wanna sleep too. i'm gonna be grumpy tomorrow morning if we don't get enough sleep and i have dance practice with jyp."
"you're always grumpy in the mornings momoring."
"no i'm not!"
"yes you are." nayeon quips.
"shut up or i'll kiss you again im."
that makes everyone pause, processing the words in their head. momo doesn't even seem to realise what she's said, staring fiercely back at nayeon, only focused on winning their little bouts of banter.
you all stand in the kitchen in awkward silence, looking nervously at each other, unsure of what to say.
eventually sana speaks up, laughing edgily. "are y/n and i interrupting something orr...?"
"what?! no?!" they both speak up, protesting loudly.
you laugh, trying to ease the tension that seems to have come out of nowhere. "i could've said that about you and momo sana. that was some kiss." that was probably not the right thing to say to ease the tension.
"that's nothing. sana and i kiss all the time." momo brushes you off, shrugging, but sana looks hurt at the her words.
"nothing?"
"wait what do you mean all the time?"
momo blushes, looking between sana and nayeon. but sana's easily emotional feelings, amplified by her intoxication, have her eyes watering, sending momo straight into panic mode. "wait no- that's not what i meant satang-"
"then what did you mean?" sana frowns, you weren't sure if she was genuinely angry now or still playing around.
"i don't- satang i'm stupid we know this i just say stupid shit- things just come out of my mouth i didn't mean it like that-"
"then in what way did you mean it momoring?" her tone is clipped, throat scratchy.
"satang this isn't fair-"
"what isn't?"
"c'mon- satang please-"
all of a sudden, sana lurches forward, pressing her lips against momo's, trapping her against the kitchen counter. nayeon falls onto you without sana holding her up, you quickly grab her waist, supporting her, but both your eyes move back to sana and momo quickly.
they're kissing for real this time, not like when they were putting on a show for everyone else during the game. and you're both close enough you can hear the wet smacks of lips against lips, the little gasps and whimpers, every breath they take in between each kiss. momo's hands have come up to tangle in sana's hair, pulling her closer, their bodies meeting and moving against each other like they were made for each other.
you squirm slightly under nayeon, hands gripping her waist tighter at the sight, the dizzy feeling from earlier returning full force. you try and force yourself to focus on something else, it was probably a bit weird, to be so close, staring as your two closest friends made out, but you couldn't bring yourself to look away, your gaze lidded at the rushed pace, tongues clashing and being sucked into mouths.
you can tell nayeon is feeling very similarly, her hot breath hitting your lips at a faster pace than normal, laboured with excitement.
there's a crashing sound from upstairs where they were playing the game, followed by loud whooping and cheering. it pops the bubble that's formed between the four of you. sana breaks away from momo, panting, hands having come in to hold onto the other girl's hips, pushing her into the bench further having squeezed their bodies together as close as possible.
"w-was that- nothing?" her voice comes out hoarse and in a whisper, still catching her breath.
momo can't speak, her eyes still tightly shut, shaking her head in response.
"then what was it?"
momo groans, knocking her forehead against sana's gently, "don't ask me that sana." her voice is also laced with shaky breaths.
"why not?"
"it's confusing. you know i can't handle thinking about that much."
"am i confusing?"
she shakes her head again, but then points to you and nayeon, drawing a circle between the four of you, "this is confusing."
that gives sana pause, thinking over the possible implications of momo's words, taking the chance to catch her breath. then she looks up to the both of you, her eyes dragging up from the way you're still clutching nayeon's waist tightly, before meeting yours. the eye contact sends shivers down your spine, even when her eyes leave yours to stare into nayeon's, you can still feel all your senses on alert, breath held, tensions at an all time high.
sana's head tilts again, considering the both of you. then, she seems to come to a decision, and she's just as quick as she always is.
before you realise it, her lips are on yours, hand cupping your cheek, the other wrapped around nayeon to keep her there.
it's nothing like that first kiss you shared weeks ago. that was a simple peck, there and gone. this time, sana's moving her lips against yours, fingers caressing your cheek, down to your neck, lips soft and wet, panting directly into your mouth.
momo forces her eyes open, staring at you and sana kiss with hooded eyes. hands coming back down to grip the bench behind her, knuckles almost turning white from how hard she was holding onto it.
sana breaks away from you, but without taking a breath, turns her head, and starts kissing nayeon.
nayeon is only slightly surprised, almost all her weight leaning on you, gripping the back of your top tightly, reciprocating sana's kiss with as much vigor as sana gives.
when they finally break apart, you're all still breathing heavily, looking between each other, tension surmounting, thousands of words unsaid.
it's nayeon that speaks up first this time. she whistles lowly, letting out a small chuckle, "so... that wasn't... nothing."
"no." momo agrees. their eyes meet.
sana rolls her eyes, getting impatient, "so do you two wanna fuck or do you wanna fight?"
neither of them protest this time, they don't even laugh it off, you can all feel the very real pressure in the air.
"dunno. i think i need a..." momo licks her lips, "another taste to know." then she leans forward, capturing nayeon's lips with her own, straight up moaning at the contact. your thighs clench together at the sound. all of this was getting too much for your dumb little drunk brain. you had been spectating more than you had been involved, and it'd be a lie if you said you weren't turned on by it all.
nayeon and momo's kiss is different from sana's kisses. they're both aggressive, fighting for dominance, their natural banter translated onto their lips, grunts and gasps, trying to one-up each other.
eventually, they break away, but momo transitions straight over to you.
"need to compare." she mumbles lowly before attaching her lips to yours. she's much more gentle with you, teasing your mouth open before dipping her tongue inside, you whine against her, hips moving of their own accord when they grind up into nayeon who's still leaning on you for support.
you hear nayeon swear under her breath, regaining some of her drunk-addled consciousness to grip your hips roughly to stop you from doing that again. but that's the end of her control, she leans in, close enough so momo and you can both hear her, just inches away from your mouths moving against each other.
"my turn."
momo obliges, breaking away from you, only for nayeon to latch on. you can still hear momo's rough breathing next to your ear while your lips start moving against nayeon's, once again, with a completely different kissing style to momo and sana. she's slow and languid, pressed against your lips until you're just about to be out of breath, before breaking away and coming back in. she finishes with a little kitten lick on your upper lip, you whine, pushing your hips against her hands as she growls, pushing you back into the counter.
sana's spent the entire time watching all of you, having enough time to even pour herself another much needed drink. she swirls around the contents of her cup, downing it and speaking up again. "home?"
"home." you all unanimously agree.
𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ⋅ᡣ𐭩 ་༘࿐
you wake up hazily with a pounding headache, vision blurred, mouth dry.
you squeeze your eyes shut again, the dim brightness of the room too much for you. you reach blindly for your glasses that should be next to your pillow on the top bunk of the bunk bed you share with sana. instead, your palm comes colliding with something that most definitely was not your glasses.
your eyes shoot open, squinting and trying to focus, as the person you've hit groans.
"10 more minutes."
"...momo?"
momo groans again, burying her face into the pillow you're sharing, hair messily coming to cover her eyes and furrowed eyebrows.
suddenly, memories of last night come flying back to you. you look down alarmingly, lifting the blanket slightly to find yourself very naked, with an equally naked momo curled around you, arm thrown lazily over your side, legs intertwined.
you also realise that this was not your bed. you were on the bottom bunk of the bunk bed opposite the one you shared with sana, this was nayeon's bed. now even more confused, you slowly turn your body, trying your best to not disturb momo who mumbles something while you shuffle around the bed, before pulling you closer into her.
the sudden feeling of her chest now pressed against your bare back surprises you, even though you knew you were both naked. you try your best to not think about it, squinting to look around the room for where nayeon could be if you were in her bed.
you didn't have to look far though, cuddled up on sana's bed right opposite you, is sana and nayeon. and you'd bet they were in the same state of undress you and momo were.
your heart rate picks up as you recall the events of last night. you hadn't exactly done a lot of talking. as soon as you got home, you were all over each other, somehow, you had made the limited space, and the fact that not all four of you could fit on one little bunk bed work for all of you. your thighs tingle with the memory, a blush adorning your face.
eventually, it's sana that wakes up first, turning in her bed and blinking at you slowly.
you let her come to her senses, your eyes drifting down to where the blanket has fallen in her movement, breath catching at the sight of her pretty naked chest moving up and down slowly with each breath.
sana doesn't mind the attention, she never has, she yawns, stretching unabashedly, revealing more of herself, sitting up and letting the blanket fall to her waist. "morning." she grumbles out, her voice scratchy and deep with fatigue.
you gulp, unable to tear your eyes away from her, "morning."
nayeon whines as sana moves, slowly waking up as well, her arm curled around sana's thighs, trying to keep her still.
sana reaches around and pulls an oversized shirt on, patting her hair down. you're not sure if you're thankful or mournful she's covered up.
"what time is it?" nayeon's voice speaks up, laced with the same hoarse tiredness you're sure you all have right now.
sana picks up her phone on the bedside table next to her bed, you're not sure where yours is. "6."
"too early. come back to bed."
sana giggles then, putting her phone back down and running a hand through nayeon's hair. "don't you have a schedule to get to later?"
"yeah later."
"... we should talk anyway." she's strangely serious, normally the most energetic of you all, even in the mornings. it gets nayeon to look up, hair messy, squinting, placing her chin on sana's thigh.
sana smiles at the sight, you find nayeon's glasses next to her bed, reaching to hand it over.
sana murmurs her thanks, stretching out to grab it from you and gently placing it over the eldest's eyes. she looks adorable.
"how long have you been awake?" nayeon directs the question to you, finally able to see you were awake and looking at the two of them.
you smile, "not that long."
"is momo...?"
"still asleep."
"should we wake her?"
"she's not gonna like that."
"she needs to get up in a bit anyway. she has practice with jyp later remember?"
in agreement, you turn in your spot again, smiling at the sight of momo, mouth hanging open slightly, black hair framing her face. hesitantly, you nudge her shoulder. there's no response, so you nudge her again, a little harder. she groans, grabbing your hand and interlacing your fingers, "10 more minutes."
you giggle, "you said that 10 minutes ago."
she mumbles incoherently, drifting back into sleep.
you roll your eyes, nudging her again, except she doesn't respond. so you resort to different measures, your other hand that isn't being held captive by her, sneaks down between the two of you, and you start tickling her sides.
she squirms, blinking, waking up, whiny and giggly.
"s-stop- stop y/n- stop- i'm up i'm up!"
there's laughter from behind you as well, and momo sits up, pushing your hands away to stop you from your attack. not that she needed to, your eyes focused on something else as soon as the covers left her body. but of course, she bumps her head on the bunk, yelping, and cradling the top of her head, her hangover only worsening.
"okay okay guys- before we talk- i'm gonna need all of you to put on some clothes." you speak up, eyes still staring at momo's chest, almost drooling over her.
momo raises an eyebrow, before she shoves her chest into your face, rolling on top of you and squishing you.
"wha- momo- hey! no- mmf-"
you can hear everyone laughing as momo gets her revenge, pulling on the back of your neck while pushing out her chest, squeezing your face in between her breasts.
she finally breaks away once she's had enough, grinning and plucking a shirt down from her bunk on the top bed, pulling it loosely over her body.
"there. better?" she's kneeling on top of you, legs on both sides of your torso, shirt just long enough to reach past her top thighs. you gulp, eyes trained on the skin of her legs. momo rolls her eyes, pulling her shirt down a little more, coughing to get your attention.
your eyes snap back up to her with a blush.
she grins, leaning down easily and pecking you, rolling off of you again with one leg still thrown over your legs and cuddling into your side.
"morning losers."
"you're inconceivable momo."
"where'd you learn that word from? my ass?"
nayeon blushes, digging into sana's thighs. "throw me a shirt you little gremlin."
"get it yourself."
"you're on my bed!"
momo blinks, looking down at herself, finally coming to realise her surroundings. "oh."
sana laughs, pulls a shirt from under her bed and hands it to nayeon, "just borrow one of mine for now."
"sana i just got one for her!"
"give it to y/n."
"you just wanted to see her in your clothes."
"so?"
momo grumbles, handing the shirt she had grabbed for nayeon to you, helping you pull it on, hand skimming over the skin of your side and stomach.
“so…” you cough awkwardly, squirming under momo’s fingers that have stayed beneath your shirt, drawing random shapes into your skin.
“wait why do we need to talk?” she speaks up, leaning on her elbow, face on her palm looking across the room.
sana laughs, “is it simple for you now momoring?”
“is what simple?”
“i love your brain you idiot.”
“huh?” momo looks as confused as ever, too early to be thinking about anything.
sana takes a breath, gripping nayeon’s hand, “i like you. all of you.”
momo blinks, “we like you too.”
“i don’t want to kiss mina the way i kiss you momoring.”
“oh.” momo looks at sana, thinking, “but don’t you kiss everyone?”
sana laughs again, “is that what you think of me?”
she shrugs, “we kiss all the time.” she quickly corrects herself, not wanting to make the same mistake as last night, “and it doesn’t mean nothing. i’m sorry for saying that last night.”
the younger smiles, appreciates the effort, “you’re right. i kiss you all the time. no one else. i think you just get too dazed to notice anything else after we kiss.”
nayeon snorts, laughing loudly.
“what about dahyun last night?” you speak up, recalling the whispered words sana said to the younger trainee.
“we were playing spin the bottle. nayeonnie doesn’t like bambam even though she kissed him right?”
nayeon’s laughs turn into coughs very quickly, “absolutely the fuck not.”
“i was just making sure dahyunnie was okay with me kissing her, i told her it’d be really quick and i wouldn’t kiss her like i did momo. you don’t have to be jealous y/n.” she teases.
you whine, “i wasn’t!! i was just curious…”
“wait… is that why you left the game early last night?”
you feel your cheeks heat up, refusing to acknowledge the question.
“y/n!”
“what!”
“you should’ve told us! or me.”
“no way. i didn't even know what i was feeling. i just needed to get some air."
"will you tell us next time?"
"next time what?"
"next time you feel anything. even if you don't know what the feeling is."
you smile, pulling momo's hand that was creeping dangerously higher out from under your shirt, and interlocking your fingers, "yes. i will. i like you all too."
"blegh."
you and sana both look at nayeon with a frown.
"what?" she asks simply, crunching her nose up.
"nerd." sana pushes nayeon off her thigh, rolling her eyes.
"i'm not good with feelings!"
"get better with them then because i'm not dating an emotionless narcissist."
nayeon perks up, ignoring the insult, "we're dating?"
sana blushes, "i don't know. do you guys want to?"
"i do." you offer sana a reassuring smile, she's been leading the conversation this whole time and it took a lot of courage to do that. "momo, nayeon?"
"i don't think anything changes between us. except we all get to kiss and have sex whenever we want right?"
"momo!" you slap her hand lightly, she snickers.
"yeah. i'm pretty happy with that."
you all turn your gazes to nayeon.
she rolls her eyes, "as long as i get to top momo."
"just try it!"
"i will!"
you spend the rest of the morning, laughing, cuddling, doing things you'd always do together, but now with more freedom and less confusion.
𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ⋅ᡣ𐭩 ་༘࿐
sometimes, you wish you had a different dream. a lot of the time really.
it hasn't been a good week. monthly trainee evaluations were coming up, and everyone could feel the pressure. there were rumours running around that jyp was preparing a survival show to debut the next girl group, and he was in the midst of picking trainees to participate, so everyone was on edge more than ever.
the one who had it the worst was momo.
you wince, curling in on yourself, knees to your chest, head resting on your knees, while you listen to your girlfriend dry heave in the bathroom.
nayeon's pacing around the room, obviously agitated, wishing she could do something to help. sana was in practice, you knew how hard she was working recently, she didn't need to worry about anything more right now.
"-stupid fucking trainers. they're all fucking blind she doesn't need to lose weight. they're gonna fucking kill her fuck-"
the bathroom door creaks open. both you and nayeon's heads snap towards it immediately.
nayeon rushes forward, holding momo up, caressing her cheek, brushing hair out of her face.
momo looks pale as a ghost. she's trembling, exhausted, you can barely stand to look at her without breaking down in tears. she knows. she knows how you all felt about her. so even when she's suffering the most, she still manages to crack a joke, "you care about me now im?"
"shut up momo. this isn't the time for that. you should lie down."
momo groans weakly, "can't. need to go to the gym."
nayeon explodes then, "what?! you are not going to the fucking gym right now momo. look at yourself! you're dying!"
"you still think i'm hot though right?" she grins. it has none of her usual sparkle, no mischief, just white teeth and lips.
"shut up or i'll kill you before you kill yourself."
the younger girl shrugs, you can see her bones with the movement.
"don't go to the gym. you already haven't eaten anything for the last five days. you haven't even drunk water for the last five days."
"yeah and i've still got 2 and a half kilos to lose."
"you don't- you shouldn't have to do that! you're skinny enough! you're going to die before you lose that weight!"
momo takes a shaky breath, you're surprised when a tear escapes her eye. even the fact that her body still has enough water to cry, and her not being the type of person to cry much in the first place, especially in front of other people, is shocking enough. she can't hold herself up any longer, collapsing onto the bed next to you. you open your arms immediately, lowering your legs, adjusting so she can lean all her weight on you. the feeling of her body against yours is terrifying. she's all bones. you can feel each rib, every pointy bone in her joints.
"i know. i'm so scared of dying." she whispers out eventually, still crying silently.
nayeon squeezes in as well, holding one of momo's hands, bringing it up to her lips to kiss it softly.
"i don't want to sleep. i'm terrified i won't wake up again. that i won't be able to see you guys again."
there are tears streaming down yours and nayeon's faces as well now.
"then eat. please darling. you need to eat." nayeon begs, wiping at her eyes furiously.
momo looks up at her weakly, smiling even now, "you know i can't. you'd both be doing the same thing if you were in my position right now."
you hold back choked sobs, burying your face into her neck. she can feel the tears staining it.
"it's okay. i'm gonna be okay. we're all going to be okay." her hand finds yours, squeezes both your hand and nayeon's.
"it's not fair. you're pretty much the same weight as me. why are they making you do this?"
she shrugs again, her sharp shoulders dig into your chest, "maybe they're testing me."
"for what?" nayeon says incredulously.
"dunno. if i have the willpower. if i'm ready to die for my dream. who knows."
"it's not willpower. it's fucking starvation. you're not even- you're all muscle. there's nothing to lose. the number on that scale is only higher because muscle is heavier than fat. and you wouldn't have all that muscle if you weren't the best dancer in this fucking company."
"you think i'm the best dancer?"
nayeon sighs frustratedly, "i know you are. darling... please. please just- some water- anything-"
"i can't. i'm sorry."
you've been talking in circles for days. the same thing, over and over again, begging her to eat, drink some water, rest. she's persistent though, hasn't broken once. when she first told you all the news, you were aghast, angry, but not surprised. you all thought you knew what it meant to lose 7 kilograms in a week, it was terrible, but it wouldn't be impossible. they wouldn't set you an impossible task. there has always been importance placed on your weight in this industry. they weighed you every morning before classes, tracked your progress, what you ate, how often you worked out, made sure you were kept consistently underweight, just how the public liked you. if they said momo needed to lose 7 kilograms to be attractive, to get a chance to debut, then she needed to lose 7 kilograms.
it wasn't until around the third day that you realised just what that meant though.
she collapsed in dance class. it wasn't an out of the ordinary experience, they put all of you on the edge of malnutrition, so there were always girls fainting left and right. but it was the first time for momo. and unlike the other girls who were instructed to eat better, momo was encouraged to keep doing what she was doing. because it was working, she was losing a kilogram everyday, more than that at the time because all her water weight was gone first.
so she came home that night proud that she had collapsed. they'd brainwashed her.
and so she kept on going. when all the trainees were off enjoying lunch, she had two fingers down her throat in the company bathrooms. when everyone retired to go home for the night and rest, she'd be running 10 miles an hour on the treadmill at the gym. naturally, her body started shutting down. she was losing too much weight too quickly, she wasn't getting the nutrients she needed to function as a human being, her body was in a state of panic, it was retaining as much weight as it could, it thought momo was in trouble, that it needed to protect her from all of these sudden changes, so it's natural she stopped losing weight at such a fast rate.
she didn't care if it was natural. all that mattered was that that number on the scale was 7 kilograms less than it was when she was first told to lose the weight.
on the outside, you could see how much it was affecting her, not just physically, but mentally as well. you were so confused what to do, you wanted to support her, and as a trainee who had the same dream as her, you understood why she was doing what she was doing, but you also didn't want her to die. you wanted your momo back, the one that smiled and laughed and played around with sana, secretly loving how affectionate sana was despite her outwardly 'cool girl' persona. you wanted the momo that teased and fought with nayeon, the only one that could bring nayeon back down to earth when she was getting too much in her head. you wanted the momo that kissed and pulled you into her whenever you shared a bed, that clung to you in the morning when you had to get up, whiny and pouty and sleepy. she was a shell of herself now. they had ripped the life out of one of your favourite people on the planet.
the door to your dorm clicks open softly.
you're all still cuddled up on the bed, squeezed against one another.
sana walks in, a tired smile on her face. it immediately disappears once she sees the tear streaks on all of your faces.
she rushes forward, cupping momo's cheeks, checking her pulse.
"i'm alive satang don't worry."
"did you eat?"
"you know i haven't."
sana's the most emotional of you all. just seeing her favourite people crying has her own tears welling up.
"oh satang not you too-"
"i can't help it. look at you momoring. why didn't you guys tell me?" she directs that to you and nayeon, frowning.
"you were at practice. we didn't want you to worry."
"momo is more important than practice."
"no satang. monthly evaluations are in two days. you're gonna make that lineup."
"i don't care if i make it if you die momo!"
"stop it. all this talk about- i'm not going to die guys. i'm fine, don't give up on me yet. i'm still here. if you all think i'm not going to make it then how am i supposed to think i'm going to make it?"
"that's not fair momo." you speak up, still cuddled into her neck. "this isn't- this isn't a daily worry. we live in the fucking twenty first century it's not normal to worry about whether or not you're going to live to see tomorrow."
"please momoring. here-" sana starts scrambling around in her bag, pulling out a thermos. "just one please-" she shakes out an ice cube, holds it out to momo in her palm.
momo stares at it, watches it melt, her mouth open, lips dry.
"please it's just one-"
"i-i... i can't-"
sana sobs, head falling into her elbow, crouched on the floor.
nayeon gently takes the ice cube from her, holds it in her palm, watching momo's gaze follow it.
"momo..."
"don't make me nayeon. please. i can't."
"i'm not. i won't." nayeon makes sure momo is still watching her, then she slowly takes the ice cube into her own mouth. she sucks on it, her cheeks hollowing out, melts it in her mouth slowly. when she's done, she opens her mouth, showing she's swallowed it all, then she asks, "do i look different?"
momo looks at her confused, "no?"
"if i went on that scale, how much do you think my weight will change?"
momo gets it, her face darkening again, "don't do this nayeon."
"just answer the question."
"...it probably wouldn't."
"right. look, here, y/n, have one." she reaches for sana's thermos, you hold out your hand, accepting the cold cube, then you pop it in your mouth, burying yourself back to your position in her neck, kissing the skin there gently with your cool lips.
she sighs on top of you.
nayeon's shaking another one out, popping it in her mouth, then she's giving one to sana who has her hand out, staring at momo with wide, hopeful eyes.
momo looks between the three of you, you all had so much love for her, you all just wanted the best for her. it was one ice cube. her body was screaming for it.
slowly, she holds her palm out.
you all stare at her with bated breath, almost in disbelief.
she smiles, "i've probably cried out enough for an ice cube right?"
sana lets out a broken laugh, nayeon's quick to shake out an ice cube into momo's palm.
momo stares down at it, brings it up to her mouth, takes a breath, then encloses her lips around it.
she sighs again, closing her eyes, reveling in the coolness of it, leaning back against you more.
you let her, leaning back fully until you're laid on the bed, spooning her. nayeon comes in behind you, squeezing herself against the wall, an arm coming up to rest on your midriff, her hand able to reach momo's side. sana clambers up as well, kissing momo's forehead and sniffling, looping an arm around her waist and snuggling in. after you had started dating you ended up pushing the two bunk beds in your room together so you could all share the bottom bunk, and so you could use the top bunks for storage space. it was still a little bit of a squeeze but the four of you didn't mind. you liked being as close as you all possibly could.
momo couldn't shake the thought that the ice cube melting down her throat would add on another kilogram or two, but she tried to focus on the feeling of her loved ones curled around her instead, falling into a restless sleep, praying she would be able to wake up and feel like this again.
𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ⋅ᡣ𐭩 ་༘࿐
you grip your fork tightly, stabbing into your bland salad.
sana sits next to you, just as stiff, staring daggers across the cafeteria.
momo doesn't seem to mind though. she's happily munching away at her leaves. your heart softens a little at the sight, remembering how far she pushed herself last month, at least she was eating better now.
but then nayeon's laugh breaks through again, loud and bright. your jaw tightens at the sound.
"that's it." sana goes to stand but you tug on her hand, pulling her back down.
"don't."
"why not?" she spits, you've never seen her so livid. she was the happy charm of the company, people forget she could feel other emotions too.
"you'll cause a scene."
"good. then maybe he'll get his fucking baby hands off her."
"we can't. everyone will wonder why."
"why what?" she's still seething.
"why you have an issue with them. at worst they’ll think there’s something going on between you and nayeon. at best they’ll think you have a crush on him."
sana blanches, flicking her gaze over to you, “what?!”
“i don’t like it either. but we just have to trust her right?” you offer a smile, it’s a bit wonky and forced and sana sees straight through it, but it does get her to calm down a bit, taking a breath and slumping down in her seat.
“fine.”
“she loves you.”
“whatever.”
you smile genuinely at momo who looks at you in confusion, her mouth still full of lettuce. you shake your head, gesturing for her to keep eating and not to worry.
it’s not until later in the day when you have combined level dance practice that the issue comes up again. normally, he wouldn’t be near your class, sana and momo were naturally gifted dancers, so they were in higher level classes, and nayeon was an all-rounder, she was always in every top class to ensure she was around other people her level.
“they’d be cute wouldn’t they?” jihyo makes light conversation while you’re all stretching.
jeongyeon scoffs, “are you serious? he’s like… a baby.”
“he won’t be for that much longer.”
“gross dude!”
jihyo laughs.
“who are you guys talking about?” momo moves towards your group, mina in tow behind her.
“bambam and nayeon.”
“oh.” she drops down in a stretch, “what about them?”
jeongyeon snickers, teasing momo, “of course you didn’t know you airhead. bambam has a crush on her.”
“really?”
“yeah. did you see him almost wet himself when he got her during spin the bottle at jackson’s party?”
“it was so funny! and then when he went in to kiss her, that was so awkward! poor kid, i almost felt bad for him.”
“i don’t.” sana speaks up then, her teeth gritted, eyebrows furrowed, not even bothering to hide her gaze, staring at bambam and nayeon playing around in the mirror.
jihyo and jeongyeon exchange glances, confused.
“uhh… you okay sana?”
her eyes snap back up to meet jeongyeon’s, “yeah. fine, why?”
“you just seem a little… edgy.”
sana huffs, standing up again, “just tired.” she doesn’t say anything else, turning on her heel and leaving the training room.
momo catches your eye, tilts her head in question.
you shake your head, speaking up, “i’ll check on her.”
you jog outside, finding her near the water fountain.
“hey.”
“if you’re gonna lecture me again i don’t want to hear it.”
“no i wasn’t- i didn’t mean to lecture you at lunch. i just wanted to check on you.”
she sighs, sinking down into the cushion next to the fountain. you carefully sit next to her.
“i’m sorry. i just- i do trust her i just- i don’t trust him.”
“he’s just a kid sweetie.”
she scoffs, “yeah a hormonal pubescent teenage boy. they’re soo innocent, not like they don’t watch porn and jack off to every woman who even breathes near them.”
you’re about to reply when the door to the dance studio opens again, it’s nayeon.
she pokes her head out, looks up and down the hallway, and spots you, grinning. she jogs down to the both of you.
“hey! what are you guys doing here? class is about to start!”
sana doesn’t bother meeting her gaze, “oh so now you care about us?”
nayeon frowns, looks at you in confusion, you feel incredibly awkward, avoiding her eyes as well, “what’s going on?”
“nothing. go back to your boyfriend.”
“what?”
“you heard me.”
“i don’t know what you’re talking about sana. c’mon, let’s go to practice.”
“you don’t? is it that natural for you to drape yourself all over him?”
“what?”
sana finally looks up, eyes red and angry, “bambam. you know he likes you. why do you entertain him?”
“what? sana he’s just a kid-“
sana stands then, throwing her hands up in frustration, you keep your gaze locked on your shoes, “a kid! i’m sick of hearing that! so what if he’s a fucking kid? we’re fucking kids. you all think it’s so impossible that the im nayeon would ever like someone like him so it shouldn’t be anything to worry about right?! you know what sounds more impossible?! that im nayeon is in a polyamorous relationship with three other girls. three other kids!”
“sana! calm down don’t be so loud-“
“no don’t you tell me to fucking calm down. you see? we have to hide this. us. we can’t even talk about us in public. i was okay with that! because i still had you all. you were all worth it! but you could get with bambam right now and people wouldn’t even bat an eye. they’d celebrate it, congratulate him for pulling the girl, all while we can’t even hold hands in public without people looking at us weird!”
“but i- i don’t want to be with him! i want to be with all of you!”
“then don’t fucking laugh at his jokes, touch his biceps, compliment his fucking hair!”
“but- honey that’s all harmless-“
“you still don’t get it! you-"
the door opens once again, and this time it's momo's head that pops out. she frowns when she sees all of you, walking up, tilting her head in question.
sana huffs, "whatever. i'm not feeling like practice today. tell the instructors i'm sick please."
"wait sana-"
she turns on her heel and struts briskly away.
nayeon sighs in frustration, running a hand through her hair, "what is going on with her?" she mutters to herself.
you frown, the events of the day culminating, you wish nayeon could see where you were coming from, "she told you. i think it was pretty obvious." you didn't mean to sound so clipped, your tone just slipped out that way.
nayeon looks down at you, you were never one to talk back, you'd kept more of your emotions to yourself. "are you angry with me too then?"
"that's not it nayeon. look i don't want to fight. let's just go to practice."
you stand up, brushing past her, unable to look her in the eye. you can hear momo questioning nayeon behind you before you open the door to the practice room again, thinking over sana's words that left a heavy feeling in your stomach.
𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ⋅ᡣ𐭩 ་༘࿐
after practice, you and momo go and grab dinner while nayeon has to go to another vocal lesson.
momo's still blissfully unaware, talking about how the dance practice was and how much fun she had in such a big class with everybody. you listen to her ramble with a smile, not wanting to burst her bubble.
it's unavoidable when you go home later that night and find nayeon alone in your dorm, freshly showered and typing away at her phone.
momo skips in first, kissing nayeon and grabbing some clothes to shower into, heading into the bathroom right after.
nayeon looks at you then, putting her phone down, "hey."
"hi." you shrug off your bag, taking off your shoes.
"where's sana?"
"i thought she'd be home by now."
she frowns, "i haven't seen her since..."
you bite your lip, growing slightly concerned, "should we call her?"
"i don't know if she would pick up for me..."
"right..." you take out your phone, scrolling to sana's contact and pressing dial. it rings for a little, and just before you're about to give up, she picks up, giggly and breathy.
"y/n!! i miss you! what's up!"
you squint, there was a lot of background noise, "sana where are you?"
"out! i'm having fun!"
"where?"
"i don't really know but i'll be home soon! i promise! i love you!" she blows a kiss through the phone and then she hangs up.
you stare down at her contact picture, it was of her and a hamster plushie momo had won for her when you had gone on a date to the carnival. you had all agreed it looked like her and she had hated it because she thought you were saying her chubby cheeks were the resemblance point.
"is she okay?" nayeon speaks up again, barefaced with her thick glasses on.
"i think so. she sounded... she said she'd be home soon."
"oh."
"yeah."
it's oddly quiet, awkward. you start shuffling out of your day clothes, picking out pyjamas for your turn to shower after momo.
"are we okay?" nayeon breaks the silence suddenly, eyes seemingly even bigger behind her glasses. she fiddles with her fingers nervously.
you sigh, moving around the small room to clean up a little, if only to give your hands something to do, so you had an excuse not to look at her. "i don't know. i think sana's less okay than me."
"but you're still... not okay?"
"i feel silly. momo doesn't even feel anything about it. i wish i was the same. i know you'd never cheat on us or whatever, i just- it's still hard y'know? watching you be like that with him. like- you wouldn't want to see me all over another guy right?"
"but he doesn't mean anything to me. he's just- he's like my little brother."
"i know that's why i feel silly. i know realistically you'd never leave us for him. but it still hurts sometimes- like- like you're dangling the fact that you can in front of our faces."
she's quiet for a bit. you risk it to sneak a glance at her. she has her eyebrows furrowed, thinking.
you sigh again, moving forward and standing next to the bed. you place your hand on her head, then start running your fingers through her hair.
"i'm sorry. i don't want to be- i'm not trying to be clingy or jealous or whatever i just can't help it. i- i- i love you."
she looks up at you, surprised. your hands move down to cup her cheeks, smoothing out the skin, there.
you lean down, pressing your forehead against hers, breathing softly, closing your eyes, appreciating her presence. then, you move the extra inch to press your lips together, just slowly, softly, only for a second or two.
when you break away, she doesn't let you go, holding onto your wrist and tugging you down gently, asking you to hug her. and you oblige. kneeling on the bed, letting her wrap her arms around you, and place another kiss on the crown of your head.
"i love you too. i'm sorry i didn't- i wasn't aware of how it looked on the outside. i never- because he doesn't mean anything to me like that, i didn't think anything of it. i didn't realise you guys may have taken it differently. thank you for telling me."
you peck the side of her hand that's right next to your face, holding yours. "it's because you're a T isn't it?" you joke.
she chuckles behind you, "yeah and all my girlfriends are Fs. emotional losers."
"repressed freak."
she rolls her eyes, brings you in closer, "i love you."
"you said that already."
"i wanted you to know again."
"looks like our F is rubbing off on you."
she whines, "are you not going to say it back?"
you smile, "i love you too."
when momo comes out of her shower, she curls into bed immediately with you all, tired from her day and wanting no more than to sleep with her girlfriends. she hopes you've all made up and the fighting can stop tomorrow.
𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ⋅ᡣ𐭩 ་༘࿐
"did she come home last night?"
"it doesn't look like it."
"fuck she's not picking up her phone either."
"where could she be?"
"what are we going to tell the company?"
"she can't just have gone missing right?"
you're all stressing, nayeon's pacing around the room like she does when she's agitated, momo's trying to call sana's cell, and you're checking her socials and her friends to see if anyone knows where she is.
"what did she say when you called her again yesterday?"
"that she'd come home soon. there was a lot of background noise though, she said she didn't know where she was."
"you don't think she's in trouble right?"
"i don't know..."
"fuck! i never should've fought with her yesterday!"
"don't- no nayeon this isn't your fault at all don't blame yourself. we're going to find her." you step up, halting her pacing, grabbing her hands and squeezing.
she sighs, gritting her teeth, "fine. c'mon. let's go to class, we're late. maybe someone there has seen her.”
before she moves to leave, you cup her cheek, turning her back to you and kiss her in reassurance. she offers a smile when you break away, but it doesn't quite reach her eyes.
momo keeps trying sana's phone while you walk to the company building. by now, you were all relatively well known in the company, and the tension could be felt by newer trainees, they cleared the way as you walked past, not wanting to get caught up in anything.
you push open the door to the dance studio hurriedly, not in the mood for another scolding from the trainers.
but you freeze, spotting sana on the floor, stretching and getting ready.
"y/n? what's wrong?" momo tries peeking over your shoulder to see why you've stopped, and then she spots her as well.
"satang!"
sana looks up, there are obvious bags under her eyes, she's sluggish in her movements. momo pushes past you, dumping her bag down and rushing over.
"where were you?! we've been calling you all morning!"
sana squints, backing away from momo who was speaking too loud for her, "phone died."
"we were worried satang! why didn't you come home last night?" she says the last part in a whisper, not wanting to get sana in trouble with the watchful trainers.
you and nayeon have both entered now as well, nayeon stands behind you a little awkwardly, unsure of how to approach.
"i was out." sana says simply.
"but where?"
"doesn't matter. i'm here now right?"
"sana we were really worried." you speak up now, crouching down into a stretch.
she looks at you, her eyes are lifeless. "and now there's nothing to be worried about. i'm fine."
"what happened to you last night? you said you'd come home and then you didn't. where did you sleep? did you sleep? you look terrible."
she cringes, "gee thanks."
"you know i didn't mean it like that. what aren't you telling us?"
at that moment, bambam chooses to come over and greet you all.
"morning nayeon!"
nayeon is still focused on sana, frowning, but she greets him offhandedly anyway, "morning bam."
"what? no morning for us bambam?" sana speaks up with a teasing smile, it's anything but harmless.
"o-oh! sorry. good morning sana, momo, y/n." he bows to each of you.
"i get it. it's your crush on nayeonnie isn't it? she's so pretty right? and born to be an idol. i can see why you like her."
bambam sputters, completely unprepared, blushing bright red.
sana's smile is sinister.
"sana stop."
she looks at you innocently, blinking, "stop what? i'm not doing anything."
"sana!" behind you, mark suddenly appears, clapping bambam on the back. "last night was fun. you should invite your roomies next time! i'm sure bam would appreciate that wouldn't he?" mark elbows bambam with a snicker.
"oh i'm sure he would. i don't know though, i kinda liked it when it was just us y'know?" she sports a smirk, the one she uses when she wants sex.
mark blushes, muttering something and then dragging bambam away.
"what the fuck sana?" nayeon finally speaks up, glowering.
"what?" she blinks up.
"you were out with mark last night?"
"so what if i was?"
"we were fucking worried."
"and i told you i'm fine now. there was no reason to worry."
"we thought something bad could've happened."
"yeah well obviously nothing did right!? i don't get why you guys are so pressed. i just had a little fun, i needed it, and it was good for me."
"you mean he was good for you?"
"better for me than you were."
nayeon falters at that, hurt flashing across her face, "i'm sorry."
"what for?"
"i didn't listen to you yesterday."
sana shrugs, "it's fine. i get why you like it. i tried it. it's the attention right? it's nice to know someone else is in love with you."
"that's not- that's not what i was doing sana-"
"then what were you doing? you're with us right? so why are you flirting with other people? worried we won't last? backup options? attention?"
"sana- please- can we talk about this i don't-"
"we are talking about this."
"not here. alone."
"you ashamed of me?"
"no! sana what-"
"mark can hold my hand in public. he can kiss me in public. he can call me his."
nayeon clenches her fist, "does he?"
sana shrugs again, not bothering to answer, moving into another stretch. you can't believe her, what you're hearing, you've never seen her like this. never thought she could be like this. momo looks to be in shock too, sitting on her haunches, staring at sana with hurt written all over her face. sana ignores you all.
class starts.
you keep sana in the corner of your eye. she fools around with mark, teasing him, playfighting with him, and ignores the three of you completely. you try and understand where she's coming from, why she was purposely trying to hurt you. she just told you she loved you last night, this wasn't real. she was just doing this as her own personal form of revenge. she didn't mean any of this.
you had to keep telling yourself that.
as class ends, sana looks like she’s about to go out with mark again, but you quickly run out the door, tugging on her arm, “can we talk?”
her eyes soften when she realises it’s you, but she still looks unsure.
that is, until momo links her arm with yours, pleading with sana as well.
“alright.”
you quickly lead her into one of the empty recording studios, gesturing for nayeon to come follow before sana can change her mind. as soon as you’re all inside, you stand against the door, blocking any routes of escape.
sana scoffs when she sees nayeon enter the room as well, but with you in the way, there’s nowhere to run.
“what did you want to talk about?” her tone is cutting, she rubs in between her eyebrows, pushing out the tension there.
“you.”
“what about me?”
“how could you do that to us satang?”
sana sighs, glancing at momo, “you notice now momoring? how come you didn’t have an issue when it was nayeon?”
“w-what?”
“you knew bambam liked nayeon. why didn’t you have a problem when nayeon was hanging all over him?”
nayeon tries to protest but momo replies quickly, wide-eyed, “what do you mean? nayeon doesn’t like bambam though.”
“and i don’t like mark. so what’s the difference?”
“you went after him.” you interject.
“no i didn’t.”
“then how did you end up hanging out with him last night?”
“he saw me crying outside the company. he offered to listen and then to distract me afterwards. i had fun. he didn’t make me cry.”
“sana…” nayeon’s lower lip is wobbly.
“what?”
“…i’m sorry. for not listening to you. i should’ve given you a chance to explain yourself and understand where you were coming from.”
sana’s quiet for a bit, staring at nayeon, turning the words over in her head slowly. and then her own lip starts wobbling, throat constricting, tears welling up.
nayeon panics, “fuck- no i didn’t want to make you cry i didn’t- i’m sorry i made you cry the first time i didn’t- i’m sorry-“ she desperately wants to comfort her but she’s not sure if she can, still in an awkward sort of limbo.
sana closes it though, almost leaping into nayeon’s arms, burrowing her face into her neck and breathing out shakily, sniffling.
“…i’m sorry too. i knew what i was doing- i was being petty and stupid and jealous and i hurt all of you doing that.” she whispers into nayeon’s neck, but it’s quiet enough in the room that you can all hear her.
you breathe a sigh of relief, internal turmoil calmed for the moment. you walk forwards, wrapping your arms around the both of them, feeling momo do so as well on the other side.
“i don’t like him. i didn’t kiss or hold hands or do whatever else i said in there. i just- it really didn’t bother me before. that we had to keep this to ourselves. but then seeing nayeonnie with bambam acting so carefree and- and- everything, i just wished i could grab her and kiss her in front of him, so that everyone knew you were all mine, and that i’m all yours.”
“one day we’ll be able to sana. i promise. and i won’t- i’m not going to act like i’m not already spoken for anymore. i am all yours and i always will be.”
sana sniffles again, you’re close enough you can lean over nayeon’s shoulder and kiss her forehead.
“and i’m sorry for making you guys worry. my phone really did die though if that’s any solace.” she chuckles wetly.
“i have a portable!” momo quickly breaks away, running to her bag and pulling it out, handing it to sana with a proud smile.
sana returns it, thanking her and kissing her cheek, plugging in her phone.
“you were wrong about one thing you know.” nayeon speaks up again, the hint of a smile on her face.
sana stiffens, ready to argue again but not wanting to.
“korea is so homophobic that we can actually hold hands in public without people thinking we’re anything. we could probably get away with kissing on a few rare occasions too and people would still think we’re just really good friends. especially if we’re all kissing each other, they’ll just think we’re… all very friendly with each other and kiss as a sign of affection or something.”
sana laughs out loud, wiping away her tears with the back of her hand, “you’re right. i don’t necessarily have to hide how affectionate i am with you all.”
“and you’re very affectionate satang.”
sana rolls her eyes, hitting momo lightly. but then, her phone lights up, and she seems to read over something. she takes a few seconds, and then she’s blinking up, fresh tears in her eyes, launching forward into nayeon’s arms again.
nayeon grunts, catching her and squeezing back, “i take it you saw my message.”
“mmsorry- i lov- too.” her voice is muffled, but it’s obvious what she’s saying.
you don’t know what nayeon’s text said, and sana refuses to share with you afterwards, saying “nayeonnie’s words are for me only, tell her to do it again for you.” knowing nayeon hates expressing too much, which makes it all the more special to sana, but you’re just happy everything is okay between the four of you again.
𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ⋅ᡣ𐭩 ་༘࿐
there was something going on and everyone knew it. the rumoured survival show for a new debut group was apparently set to start filming soon. select trainees were being pulled out of practice and given the news, although they were instructed not to say anything about it in order to not cause discouragement amongst other trainees and to minimise media leakage.
your girlfriends had all been called up and informed that they would be participating. now you were all waiting in anticipation for your own name to be called out.
after the monthly trainee showcase, JYP himself comes to make the announcement.
"i'm sure you've all heard the rumours going around about the new group we're planning to debut. it's going to be televised nationally in a reality-type fashion, so even if you don't make it to the final lineup, making it onto the show itself will be a big deal already, getting your name out there for potential future plans. the name of this show will be..." he pauses for effect, "sixteen!"
there's thundering applause, but you can barely hear it, anticipating, praying he would be announcing the lineup and that your name would be there.
"it's sixteen for the chosen sixteen exemplary trainees that the staff have recognised and recommended. they will be competing for seven spots in this new group. all sixteen trainees have now been notified of their involvement, but if you haven't received any news, don't worry! i always have all of you in my mind, like god, your time will come! so please cheer on and support your fellow trainees in their journeys!"
did you hear that right? everyone chosen had been notified already? so you weren't chosen? you weren't good enough? all that training... all those hours slaving away... all those tears, doubts, connections you've lost, all for what?
you look around, other people are cheering, some are crying, some are in disbelief like you.
your feet move before you can think, pushing to the front of the crowd, grabbing JYP.
"sir- why- why didn't i make it?" you're desperate, huffing, on the verge of breakdown.
he looks you up and down, a frown appearing on his usually smiley face, "what was your name again?"
your heart sinks. he didn't even know your name.
and then a look of realisation comes across him, "oh! you're that girl that's always with nayeon, momo, and sana! you should be happy for them! they're all fantastic trainees, they'll make wonderful idols."
you blink, dumbfounded, mouth agape.
"b-but- i- what was it? was i not a good enough singer? dancer? am i not pretty enough?" you're grasping for straws, anything to help you cling on to the possibility of your dream.
he tilts his head, crossing his arms, "ah- you... perhaps it's because you're always with those three. you just don't... stand out. nayeon has natural star power, her voice is one of the strongest in the company. momo is the best dancer we have, probably one of the best dancers in your generation. and sana has a personality people gravitate towards, she can keep group morale up and maintain public image. let me ask you.. what do you have? because aside from being friends with genuinely talented people, you just seem... average."
your hand falls, head drooping, the words hitting you hard.
"don't take this too personal though! perhaps with them out of the way, you can really find your own light to shine now! i believe in you!" he smiles again, then he's off with a flourish, being guided away by busy assistants.
you stare after him in shock, a flashback of sorts playing through your head, of the hardships you've been through to get to this point, of the tears and sweat you've dripped, it was too much. you needed out.
again, your feet move before you have control over them. mind moving at miles a minute, body on autopilot.
you're back in you're dorm room before you know it, and then your suitcase is being pulled off the top bunk, laid on the floor, and you're stumbling around throwing things in haphazardly. you don't even register when the door opens and three sets of footsteps tread in, too focused on thinking about how to get out, whether you could get to the airport in time, what you would say to your parents, your family, the people standing at the door in surprise, watching you clumsily shove things into your suitcase.
"...y/n? what are you doing?"
you barely look at them to reply, voice light and distracted, "packing."
"where are you going?"
"home."
"what?"
you head into the bathroom, starting to pick off the things you needed, you could leave some things, not everything was going to fit anyway and some things you could throw away.
"y/n wait- stop- just wait-"
you ignore them, clattering makeup items falling out of order into toiletry bags.
"y/n!" it's nayeon, her hands gripping your wrists firmly, not too firm to hurt, but enough to get you to stop. you finally look up at them, the break allows you to really feel your emotions, tears welling up immediately.
"oh sweetheart." nayeon tugs you into a hug, running a hand through your hair comfortingly. you feel sana and momo surround you, placing their arms around you as well. the dams break open then, and you're sobbing into their arms, all of your emotions finally catching up.
you stay there for a few minutes, just crying it out, the girls hushing and soothing you, letting you babble nonsense and cry into their shoulders.
when you finally calm down, you're exhausted, slumping down into nayeon. she supports you immediately, and tries to peek at you from your position in her neck, but you refuse to look at her, your eyes puffy and nose red.
"do you want to talk about it?"
you shake your head.
"do you... still want to leave?"
you take a breath, unsure. "i don't know." you whisper honestly, "what do i have to do here if i stay?"
"you have us." sana says quietly.
you chuckle wetly, "you don't get it. you guys all made it. i'm never going to. i don't- i'm happy for you all i am but- my dream-"
"shhh- it's okay. we... we do get it my love. we were all on this journey together weren't we? we've all had thoughts we wouldn't make it. even nayeon." momo tries to lighten the mood a little.
"but- you've all made it now. i don't even- why would you still want to be with me? i'm not good enough. you all got through. i'm the only one who didn't. doesn't that- don't you think i'm just pathetic? how could you still like me?"
"what?! what are you talking about y/n?! we don't like you for your talent we're not some talent recruiters. we like you because you're you, you're sweet and funny and caring. i know it's hard because we're in this industry so it feels like we're all competing, but you can't- it's not like that for us. don't ever doubt our love for you again."
you sob quietly, emotions still a wreck.
"please don't leave. this doesn't mean anything. there will be other opportunities. your dream is still possible. we might not be able to debut all together like we always wanted to but- but you still have a chance y/n. don't give up on it."
you sigh, too tired to argue, letting them bring you to bed, giving you one of the coveted middle spoon spots and cuddling into you until you fell into a restless sleep.
𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ⋅ᡣ𐭩 ་༘࿐
the next few weeks are absolutely hectic. for your girlfriends. you spent most of your time moping around, giving only about 50% in all your classes, motivation completely shot. it didn't help that the three of them started spending a lot more time together, as is expected when they have to prepare filming for the same thing. often you'd find yourself coming home after a long day of practice, and find them giggling and laughing about things you have no idea about, sharing inside jokes and talking about things that happened during their day that you'd be too tired or jealous to ask about.
they tried to include you of course, but you couldn't bring yourself to join in.
internally, you felt terrible. you knew you should be proud, happy, enthusiastic that all three of them were in the process of having their dreams come true. they had worked harder than all of you, they certainly deserved this opportunity, and they deserved you to be in their corner, supporting them and loving them like any other partner would do in this situation.
but you couldn't do it. jyp's words continue to ping around your head like an endless pinball machine. how you had always been in their shadow, how he never saw your worth because of them. a small, petty part of you blamed them. you hated that part of yourself, tried to squash it down as much as you could. but sometimes when you're laid in between them at night, their light breaths deep in sleep, those thoughts come back, and you can't help but be envious of their position, wondering why them and not you.
naturally, you started drifting from them, especially when filming actually started.
they were moved out to different dorms during the filming, split into major and minor dorms so that the film crew could get some reality content. they still texted you often though, asking how your day was every night, they still made every effort to make it work. it was you who really started moving away when they were no longer physically there to remind you they loved you.
you'd cry most nights. cuddling into sheets that smelled like them, watching episodes of sixteen, wishing you were there with them. you missed them.
and then momo gets eliminated.
it's brutal. you're confused when she shuffles into your dorm room, hood over her head, dark circles under her eyes, still red from crying.
you had no idea what happened, the episode hadn't aired yet.
but your heart breaks seeing your girlfriend. you immediately squeeze her in your arms, she bursts into tears again, sobbing, clinging to you, unable to make any words.
she tells you later when you're curled up in bed, what happened and how she got eliminated. when she drifts off to bed, you stare at her sleeping face, now devoid of tears, she looked peaceful. and those sick thoughts come back.
you felt grateful she was eliminated. she was brought down to your level again. she was just another trainee now. it was terrible, but you had her again, you weren't going to lose her. you should've felt angry, sad, disappointed her dreams were just ripped away from her after getting so close. but you felt relieved instead. what a terrible person you were.
soon enough, it's the finals.
momo's dyed her hair a light blonde colour and cut bangs. you went with her and helped her pick it out the day after she came home. she needed a fresh start, needed to forget the pain it felt to be back at square 1.
now you stood with her in the crowd with the other eliminated trainees. you nod at them politely, but you have your hand tightly gripped with momo's anxiously looking up at the stage waiting for your other two girlfriends to appear. you hadn't seen them in months and you'd missed them.
momo had talked your ear off about everything that happened while she was on the show. updated you on everything. it felt nice, to be included again, to feel needed, wanted.
and momo wasn't shy about how supportive she was of nayeon and sana. constantly bringing them up during the day, wondering how they were doing, if they'd eaten yet, if they were getting enough sleep, hoping they weren't thinking about her getting eliminated too much, praying they'll both make the final group.
you agreed with her each time, but she made you feel like a terrible girlfriend. she was what you were meant to be when she was still on the show. you try and make up for it in the last few weeks, making signs and pasting pictures of nayeon and sana on posters, making some for both you and momo to bring to the finals. she grins and kisses you on the head when she sees them, saying how sweet you were, how considerate you were. you smile guiltily, knowing that was far from the truth.
finally, the lineup starts to be announced.
you spot sana on the majors side already, nayeon still on the minors side. you have your fingers crossed, anxiously watching, momo's hand is white from how hard she's gripping yours, just as anxious.
nayeon's name is announced first.
momo bursts into tears, smiling, crying. she's so proud. you are too. she made it. you always knew she would. im nayeon was born to be a star.
and then, after the first seven are confirmed, sana's spot also secured, jyp makes the surprise announcement. it was going to be a nine member group. he announces tzuyu first, as the fan favourite.
and then, momo's name is read out.
momo is in shock at first, but trainees around you start clapping her on the back, congratulating her, and she starts sobbing again, covering her face as the camera pans to her. you quickly let go of her hand, not wanting to arouse any suspicions. she tries and looks at you but she's pushed up on stage before she knows it.
you can see nayeon and sana in the back, crying, in shock as well.
you can't even listen to momo's speech.
you feel like you're the only person in the entire venue again. it was quiet. you were alone. again.
your feet start to move on autopilot again. dissociating.
you manage to slip through the crowd, back turned, not realising the girls were searching the crowd, looking for you. wanting to share one of the most important parts of their lives with you. you were too selfish to let them.
you're at the dorms again, the suitcase is out, already half-packed from the last time you'd thought about doing this. this time though, they wouldn't be able to stop you. there'd be an afterparty, you were sure, they'll probably expect to see you there, they won't. then they'll come home, worried, and find all your things gone. the only remnant of your existence, a letter placed carefully on the bed.
dear nayeon, momo, sana,
firstly, congratulations. if anyone deserved those spots, it was you three. you've all worked so hard to get here, and i'm so proud of you all. your dreams are coming true. everything you've ever thought was out of reach, is about to become reality. you deserve all the fame, money, love, everything, and i know it's going to come your way, because i fell for you too.
i'm sorry. i'm not who you thought i was. i'm not a good person. and you deserve to be with good people. i'm leaving. for good this time. i'm sorry that i chose tonight to do this, when you three should be on top of the world, in a way, it's my own sort of revenge i guess. selfishly making you feel a little of what i've felt the last few months. it's why i can't be with you anymore. i'll only bring you down more. i loved you all. i didn't want to start hating you for being better than me, i wanted to keep the memories of our love pure and joyful. if i stayed, i'd grow to despise you for having what i've wanted for all my life. i didn't want that. i'm a terrible person, i could never ask for your forgiveness, only that you forget about me. forget me and continue living your lives under the spotlight, don't let me drag you back into the shadows. don't try and find me.
i'm sorry.
when they try and call you, you'll be on the flight home, your phone unable to receive any of their messages. you throw away your phone as soon as you arrive, buying a new one and starting your new life.
they barely have time to chase after you. you'd be grateful for that. they're thrown straight into schedules and planning for their debut.
eventually, you become a distant memory for them, as they do for you.
when you're older, you'll find a box you sealed away, filled with pictures of the four of you, young and in love. you'll sit there, thumbing through them, crying, wondering how you could possibly have let them go. you'll think back to your actions, appalled at the person you were, hating the industry for pitting you against them, and then realising it was your fault the entire time. you were young, stupid, greedy, you thought your dream mattered more to you than the girls did. now that you’re older, you realise you were so wrong. the girls were your dream.
you'll buy a ticket for their concert while they’re on tour, and you'll quietly cry to yourself again, seeing them in person, grown up, smiling, singing, doing what they loved in front of crowds of people who loved them as much as they loved you all those years ago. you'll think about making yourself known to them, but you'd hurt them enough. they seemed happy now, you had no place intruding on that anymore.
you were just another stranger now. you have been for years. and you had no one to blame but yourself.
348 notes · View notes
gotta-winwin · 8 days ago
Text
going seventeen 2020 <> svtsideout
masterlist | cyana's masterlist
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
word count: 1.8k italics are in english, bolded words are in mandarin a/n: omg?? what is this?? a second update for yours truly?? got this as a request and inspiration came flying - enjoy a nice cooldown for all the angst last update!
"Hold on, hold on." Cyana had to calm them down as they started filming. "I still don't really understand what the point of today's content is."
Vernon laughed, pulling her aside to repeat the rules to her but this time in English. "We're basically doing activities while the staff tell us what emotion we have to do everything in. Like the movie Inside Out."
"Ahhhh~" Cyana nodded in understanding. "Okay. Sounds-" She frowned. "Sounds kinda silly."
"That's basically what Going Seventeen is." Vernon patted her on the back before leading her to join the group again. "Get used to it!" He shot her a thumbs-up, smiling wide when she returned a unimpressed stare.
"Wow." Dino marvelled, bringing attention to Cyana and Vernon's exchange all of a sudden. "When did Cyana get so much attitude?"
"She's always been sassy." Mingyu corrected, poking at Cyana. "Seventeen's princess~" He teased.
Cyana swatted his finger away, pointing at the staff. "Shouldn't we be filming today's content, guys?"
[staff sends seventeen's princess thanks]
"Ahh~ look at her being so professional." Hoshi teased. "She's right though."
"We've been working nonstop recently..." Dino exclaimed, bringing the spotlight onto himself. Cyana watched from next to Vernon as Dino began to introduce the premise. "...except Seungkwan."
"Seungkwan isn't here today." Hoshi repeated.
"I heard..." Jeonghan started. "...we're inside Seungkwan right now."
As the others exclaimed excitedly, Cyana grew confused, repeating Jeonghan's words under her breath, thinking she must've heard him wrong. "Inside...Seungkwan?" She asked Vernon.
Vernon nodded. "Yeah," he gestured around the room. "We're inside him right now."
She made a face. "That sounds kinda wrong."
"We're his emotions." He corrected, laughing at her disgusted reaction.
"Oh~" She nodded, finally getting it.
[HAPPY MODE ON]
Everyone started laughing almost at once, leaving Cyana confused, but joining in nevertheless. Pausing in between bouts of forced laughter, she smacked Vernon's shoulder. "What on earth is going on?"
Vernon could only shake his head, looking just as pained as he pretended to laugh. Jeonghan suddenly began to shake Cyana, encouraging her to laugh harder.
"HA. HA. HAHAHAHA." Cyana yelled out, right into Jeonghan's face.
Jeonghan fell back in harsh laughter, real this time.
Tumblr media
"Wowww." She couldn't help to gawk at how high the rock climbing course was. She grabbed a helmet, putting it on as she continued to stare at the sheer size of the place. "This is amazing."
"Their shoulders are too wide to fit through." Mingyu's voice cut through her amazement.
She turned, giggling when she saw Wonwoo and the others, unable to cross through the pillars.
"Hoshi wants to go first." Dino pushed Hoshi towards the center. "C'mon."
[RAGE MODE ON]
The place suddenly exploded in shouts of anger, surprising Cyana who was had been talking to Jun seconds ago. She jumped in fright, letting out a harsh breath when she realized the mood had changed. She watched as the others 'fought' and couldn't help but gape at how insane they all were.
"Wow. So this is you guys during Going Seventeen." She couldn't help be a little intimidated. "I see..."
Jun snorted, breaking character upon seeing Cyana's revelation.
Mingyu pushed Jeonghan, flinging the guy several steps towards where Cyana and Jun stood, near the back. Cyana's mouth dropped at the sheer strength of Mingyu. She couldn't wrap her head around how quickly they could adapt to anger as such docile and kind people.
Jun nudged her. "You try."
She frowned. Walking up to DK, she tried imitating the gangsters for those Korean dramas she had been watching. "Who are you?" She asked aggressively, widening her stance and knocking up against DK.
The boy only burst into laughter at the sight.
"Cyana's only cute when she gets mad." Joshua said, still maintaining an aggressive tone although he was fighting not to smile.
[SAD MODE ON]
This time Cyana was ready. She had seen the cue from the staff first, immediately burying her face into Joshua's shirt pretending to cry. A little taken aback, Joshua patted her back and pretended to cry as well. She was glad her face was away from the camera or she would've died with embarrassment.
Joshua leaving her once it was his turn, she sat next to Wonwoo and gave him a tiny smile. She felt comforted he too wasn't really down to be acting so hard.
"He's so skillful." She heard Dino wail out, her shoulders now shaking with laughter instead of pretend tears.
Joshua came down, only greeted by a jealous and tearful Dino, who complimented him with wailing tones. "You're so skillful. Are there a lot of mountains in LA?"
Cyana couldn't help but snort, hand flying out to grab Wonwoo's. It isn't missed by the camera, the awkward parting they had and the little side-eye they both gave each other when the other wasn't looking.
Tumblr media
"Jump, Wonwoo!" Jeonghan yelled from his spot on the ground.
Cyana craned her neck up, watching as the boy prepared himself and jumped across. "Wowww." She said quietly. "He looks like a koala, the way he's hanging onto the sack."
Wonwoo's cheeks turned pink at her comment as he was lowered down.
DK was next, his legs visibly shaking as he climbed up.
"DK butt sexy!" Mingyu yelled out after him, prompting DK to move his hips, resulting in both cheers and groans from the others.
"Ya- Mingyu." Woozi chided. "There's a girl here."
Mingyu glanced at Cyana with red ears. Jun shielded her eyes as DK continued his climb up. Once he had reached the top, Jun let his hand down and Cyana could see how scared DK was.
"DK jump!" The others called. "You won't actually fall!"
"DK." Cyana cupped her hands around her mouth to yell. "Jump or the cookies I made back home aren't yours!"
DK looked down at her, cringing at the height. "No!" He yelled back. "That's not fair!"
"Jump!" She yelled, cheering the loudest when he did.
--
"I think I'm going to pass out." Mingyu mumbled, as he looked down at the sheer height he was at. "Why did I agree to this?"
"Mingyu!" Dino yelled up. "If you don't jump you have to call me hyung!"
"Hyung!" Mingyu yelled down. Cyana let out a loud laugh at his blatant cry of defeat. "Hyung!"
"Me too!" She yelled up at him. "Call me Noona!"
Mingyu fixed her with a stare. "Ah~ No thank you."
She pouted. "Then jump."
Mingyu looked at the sack, as if gauging an opponent.
"You can do it!" Hoshi yelled. "Mingyu!"
Cyana was both surprised he did jump and a little sad she didn't get to hear him call her noona. She sighed. "It would've been so funny."
Tumblr media
[TIMID MODE ON]
Cyana rolled a basketball across the floor towards Dino. "So we don't get hurt." She gave him a sweet smile, making him smile back.
"Guys, get over here." Seungcheol waved them over to where the group stood.
"Let's divide our teams by odd and even?" Wonwoo suggested, his tone meek and timid to match the current mood. Everyone nodded, splitting off into separate sides of the basketball court. Sensing Cyana's confusion, Wonwoo clarified for the girl. "Based on your place in the group age ranking. You're number 14 so you're with the evens."
She nodded gratefully, moving to join Jeonghan and her other teammates.
[game start!]
Seungcheol threw the jump ball rather timidly, as Hoshi slapped it over Vernon's head and close to Cyana. She swiftly grabbed the ball, taking aim and shooting the ball into the net with a clean swish.
"Wow, you're good?" Vernon exclaimed, although it sounded more like a question.
"Played a bit when I was younger." She shrugged, passing the ball to Jun and jogging alongside him.
The game continued, Cyana surprising everyone as she scored goal after goal. The other team was still catching up though, and Cyana could feel herself getting sucked into the competitiveness of the game.
[EXCITED MODE ON]
"Finally!" She yelled out. "Timid is no way to play a game."
She watched, amused at the ruckus the boys were causing at the other end of the court, as DK threw the ball into Hoshi's knees. Taking over, Cyana dribbled towards the hoop, letting out a frustrated groan when Mingyu came up to block her.
"This isn't fair!" She yelled out, trying to pass him. "You're a wall!" She does her best to body check him, slamming her shoulder into his chest. He doesn't move an inch. "Mingyu!" She whined, passing the ball to an awaiting Minghao.
"That hurt." Mingyu whined back, rubbing his chest. "You're all bone. Owwww~"
[SAD MODE ON]
As the game progressed, Cyana got in a couple more goals, managing to stay far away from Mingyu. He was the only one able to guard her, as she sped past the others or merely moved gracefully through them.
"I want to win." Dino cried out, his face morphing into a sad one.
Catching on, Cyana matched his tone and expression. "I'm so sad I'm doing sooo well."
Dino frowned. "It's not fair. You're using your experience against us."
[experience > svt]
Before Cyana can retaliate, a loud thud and sounds of laughter echoed from the other end of the court. Cyana moved away from the bodies blocking her view, realizing Seungcheol had slipped and lost his shoe in the process.
"I didn't swear!" Seungcheol tried excusing himself as he got up. "I said shoes- not sh-"
Tumblr media
"You were really good at basketball." Joshua marvelled, as they had finished the game and were now sitting down for snacks. "I was really shocked."
She blushed under the praise. "I played a lot in LA. The weather was always good so I was always at the park."
"You should play with Seungkwan sometime." He offered, reminding her Seungkwan also liked basketball. "He can introduce you to NCT's Chenle. They play together sometimes."
She nodded. "That sounds-"
The sound of Minghao yelling cut her train of thought, leaving her speechless. "Who asked for Cola?" He yelled out, the sheer volume and strength of his voice stunning the girl.
"Wow." She gaped again, turning to Joshua. "I didn't even know Hao had a set of lungs that could do that."
Joshua bit back a smile, trying to stay in character and on theme. "We're all loud when we want to be." He informed her.
She narrowed her eyes at him, not quite believing him. "Even Wonwoo and Woozi?"
"Even Wonwoo and Woozi." He agreed.
"Even you?" She pressed again. "I've never seen you mad or loud at all."
Hoshi turned around to face them, having overheard their conversation. "Joshua's pure insanity. He just hides it well."
Cyana muffled a giggle behind her sleeve. She watched as the others continued to yell, the amount of attitude in one room overwhelming her. She glanced at the camera, mouthing "I want to go home."
[overstimulated by loudness]
a/n: first gose episode! requests are open if you want to see cyana in other gose episodes - so far gose series will be request only so be sure to send one!
151 notes · View notes
hyunsvngs · 1 year ago
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
𝟓-𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫 - lee felix x gn!afab reader x han jisung (side lee minho x gn!afab reader, side kim seungmin x gn!afab reader)
wc: 6.5k
cw: boy x boy skz action depicted!!, reader is afab (gn pronouns used), everyones fuckin, alcohol, mentions of weed, minho being affectionate, sex with no strings, SMUT MDNI PLEASE
synopsis: your best friend is pissed he hasn’t had his turn yet. the only problem is, his turn begins to take place in a room with three other people present.
a/n: i am so SORRY THIS IS PURE FILTH.. i’m actually so sorry this is the filthiest thing thats been on this blog thus far. i’m so sorry. part 5 of hot bitch summer aka LIX’S INSTALMENT :D ENJOY!!!!! as usual, smut warnings under the cut!!
˚ʚ♡ɞ˚
sw: cumswapping, both sub and dom mc, sub!lix & jisung, dom!seungmin & minho, a fivesome?? of sorts??, main pairings being felix x mc and minho x mc, anal fingering (m. receiving), semi public sex, sex while tipsy?, handjobs, fingering, blowjobs, face fucking (mc rec), dirty talk, hair pulling, begging, ok so maybe a bit of subspace, seungmin is SO MEAN, so is minho but hes LESS MEAN, hickeys, mentions of pubic hair (AS ALWAYS), EDGING (MC REC), AFTERCARE!!
˚ʚ♡ɞ˚
[10:02am] Lix: what the fuck???
Hearing the familiar text chime, you rolled over to grab your phone. It felt like it had been years since you’d slept in your own bed, sans Minho and sans the random screams of the rest of the frat through the night. You’d been sleeping brilliantly, worn out from the new progress in your sex life and getting a well deserved night of good rest in your own bed. You deserved it. However, your body had different plans - clearly you were still fine-tuned to the specific notification noise you’d set to your best friend's texts. 
Rubbing your eyes clear of sleep, you ran your thumb over your screen and where the text appeared in front of you. Huh?
[10:04am] You: huh?
[10:04am] Lix: bestie be so fr rn. minho’s fine, i could barely handle jisung but i pushed through it. even changbin was a struggle. BUT HYUNJIN????? MY OTHER BEST FRIEND???????!!!
You scoffed out a laugh, fingers typing rapidly on your keyboard.
[10:05am] You: i thought u were 100% here for my hot bitch summer? 
[10:05am] Lix: I AM BUT WHEN IS IT MY TURN?????
[10:06am] You: when did u ask????
The little bubble that indicated he was typing popped up. Then it disappeared. Then it deflated again, in a modern demonstration of confusion. After that, you received a very interesting eyebrow raise emoji and a badly worded message.
[10:09am] Lix: film night 2night. we watch a film with the guys n get freaky after? ;D
Rolling your eyes, you sent a quick thumbs up emoji before locking your phone. Film nights weren’t something you were typically invited to. In all honesty, those seemed to be reserved strictly for the members of the frat themselves as a more intimate gathering. Clearly that was not the case anymore - how could it be when you were steadily making your way through them all?
It didn’t shock you Felix was throwing a tantrum. You’d expected it after Jisung, and been mildly surprised when there was still no commotion after Changbin. Clearly Hyunjin was the last straw. That was something you were unable to understand. Why had Hyunjin been the one to set him off? 
You decided not to think about it. You’d need to have your wits about you if you were going to a film night with the guys, especially since you had next to no idea who would actually be there. You didn’t want to ask. You and Minho were fine, better than ever actually, and the same went for you and the other members you’d managed to get into bed. Or on the gym floor. But you hadn’t really spoken to Chan since it all started happening despite having an amicable relationship with him beforehand, and Seungmin had some form of unspoken issue with you. 
It was obvious that he was displeased. Whether he just wasn’t woke or feminist enough did cross your mind - he was an English Literature major, for Christ’s sakes. Knowing Seungmin, his whole knowledge of the opposite gender came from Wuthering Heights or something. You weren’t sure he even had much clue what his own gender wanted romantically - had he ever even been with anyone? This didn’t seem accurate. If anything, Seungmin seemed like he’d be the most accepting of female sexuality. You only ever saw him outside of parties with glasses perched on his annoyingly cute nose and said nose deep in the pages of an old, dusty book. During parties, he was walking around with a grin on his face and trying to cause mayhem. Maybe he was just plain evil, and didn’t like talking to people unless he could be snarky. 
It was hard for you to admit the similarities you both had.
Pushing the thoughts out of your head, you sprung out of bed. You had to have your wits about you in case one of the boys chose a horror film and Felix spent the whole film cuddled up to you crying. It was a regular occurrence whenever you, Felix and Jisung had hosted one of your own film nights, just the three of you. Felix would spend the whole night crying and shaking in fear while Jisung would giggle at every jumpscare. Consequently, Felix would bicker with Jisung about laughing at a ‘super scary film’ and then a playfight would ensue. You were always left to pick up the pieces, yanking them off of eachother and proposing that you all smoked a joint to chill the fuck out.
You had to be prepared for whatever emotions the film caused that night.
Eventually turning up to the frat house, you did feel prepared. You’d packed an overnight bag with a pair of comfortable pyjamas, your phone, charger and a joint. Oh, and a bottle of vodka pushed to the bottom of your backpack. The last two were just in case. You felt you’d managed to remember all the essentials, but when you were standing at the front door, staring at the SKZ symbol, you realised you really could’ve packed a pair of sexier pyjamas. The frat logo felt like it was mocking you. You’d thought you’d pack comfortably, and so you’d just shoved a pair of pyjama shorts and a t-shirt that was three sizes too big into the bag. Mistakes were made.
Felix swung the door open upon your knock, meeting you with a beaming smile. “Hey, whore,” he chirped, new blue hair styled perfectly in a half-up ponytail on his pretty little head. You smiled, handing him your bag. 
“Take?” You responded. It’s what he deserved for calling you a whore, albeit affectionately. He grabbed it obediently anyway, nodding, lithe fingers curling around the strap and beginning to embark to his bedroom. You followed behind closely. Honestly, you were just staring at his ass in his joggers as he climbed up the stairs. There’d been no sight of the other boys yet, and actually, all of their bedroom doors were wide open - you assumed they were in the living room awaiting your arrival. You almost felt bad, worried you’d been a bit late, but you hadn’t really been given an exact time. You’d just aimed for the evening.
Felix threw your bag down on the wooden floor, and you heard the unmistakable clink of the vodka bottle in your bag on its descent to the floor. You winced, and Felix looked at you, an eyebrow quirked up. “You can’t fuck me if you’re drunk, you know.”
“I can, and I will,” You retorted, walking over to the bag and unzipping it. Retrieving your pyjamas, you turned to Felix. He stood there, feet planted to the ground and a cheeky smile on his doll-like lips. “You’re gonna watch me change?”
“Yup.”
“Felix, why are you such a perv?! Get out, don’t you want to leave something to the imagination for later?” You slapped him playfully, spinning him around by his shoulders and starting to push him out of his own room. He tripped over his computer chair, flying out of the door less than gracefully.
“I’ve seen you naked before, Y/N, Jesus-” You slammed the door shut, shoulders shaking as you laughed. “You’re so mean!”
Damn, if he thought that was mean, he clearly didn’t know how you really treated pretty boys. 
You stared around at Felix’s room once you’d pulled the shorts over your legs. Honestly, it was kind of sexy, in a red-flag kind of way. If you’d walked into any other boy’s room and seen the computer setup with multiple monitors and a lubed keyboard it would’ve terrified you. But you knew Felix - and a quick look at the perfectly made bed with pristine white sheets reminded you of that. He even had a massive pink body pillow on his bed made with Changbin’s fucking face on. You knew he slept with it every night - he’d brought it to your house once, and you and Jisung had fallen apart in giggles while making fun of him for it. He was just so Felix. It made no sense, but it made perfect sense to you. 
The sex would take place on the bed tonight, you mused. Then you scoffed out a chuckle - ‘the sex’? That’s so fucking dumb. What the fuck was the matter with you? You shook your head, running your fingers through your hair before making your way downstairs in sock-clad feet, bottle of vodka in hand. 
You cocked your head when you saw who was on the sofas downstairs. It was a typical frat house - random half-full alcohol bottles everywhere, you’d even taken your own bottle of vodka downstairs with you after all - and it smelled just the faintest bit of weed. It was relatively clean though, a fact you could probably contribute to Hyunjin or Seungmin. Seungmin seemed clean.
He seemed clean then, too, sitting on the sofa in between Minho and Jisung and looking at you with an expressionless face. His glasses weren’t on his nose, you noticed. Felix sat alone on the other couch, a red solo cup in his hand and a thick, fluffy white blanket over his legs. Everyone had cups in their hand, actually, and you wanted to kick Felix for making you feel a little awkward about bringing your own vodka. Felix smiled at you brightly while Jisung and Minho giggled about something or other. He flicked the blanket off the other seat of the sofa and patted it welcomingly.
“Come,” He demanded. You tried to avoid imagining him commanding you like that in a different situation. You walked over and threw yourself onto the couch, sidled up close to Felix. Minho was looking at you with a smile on his face, all too knowingly. Felix had definitely told him of your plans for tonight. “You want a drink, Y/N?”
“Always,” You responded quickly, making Jisung click his fingers into a finger gun at you approvingly. Felix’s hoodie was soft as he leaned over you to grab an extra cup from on the floor, quickly tipping your vodka into it and topping it off with some cheap lemonade from the store on campus. 
“Okay, so we’re watching this film,” Minho sprung up, displaying a DVD case to you. Before you could retort with a question on who actually still watched DVDs these days and didn’t just stream, you realised the cover of the case. It was a film you didn’t recognise, but the case had some big-breasted woman on the front splattered with blood and there was a knife present in the image. It was clearly old - 80s? 70s maybe, at a push? Great. That’s sex out of the window completely - Felix is going to cry.
You spoke your thoughts. “Felix is going to cry.”
Felix elbowed you, grumbling. Jisung was the one who spoke up, looking at you with round eyes. “Actually, he’s seen this before. It’s not that scary, is it, Lix?”
“You would say that,” Felix responded, putting his head on top of yours. His arm pulled you in and you took a grateful sip of your drink, loving the warmth of his toned body. It was a shame he was wearing clothes, really, but you had to remind yourself to not be a whore for two seconds. “But, yeah. I’ve seen it. It’s okay, actually, just kind of gory…”
You giggled. Felix pretended to try and bite you in response, making you squeal and push him softly. This was going to be so fucking fun.
An hour into the film, Felix began to become unsettled. He was shifting awkwardly, a fact you didn’t notice straight away given you were both now two or three drinks in. Jisung had started making his weird cocktails again too, so he was staring at the screen with half-lidded eyes. Seungmin had grabbed him a litre of water and told him to sober the fuck up. You wondered if he even knew Jisung, really.
All of a sudden, Felix’s hands were yanking you onto his lap by your thigh. You sat in between his legs, still watching the shitty vintage horror film on the just as shitty television in the living room. You only bristled slightly when you felt something extremely hard and solid on your lower back, so hard you could feel it through the layers of clothing. His hands were instantly on your thighs once you were situated, drawing soft shapes on your skin. 
“‘M hard,” Felix whispered into your ear, drowned out by the screaming on the television. You snorted.
“Yeah, I can feel that, Lixie,” You retorted in a just-as-quiet volume, wiggling back onto his erection. He let out a deep sigh, forehead dropping to your shoulder. “You wanna go to your room?”
Felix shook his head rapidly. “I already ditched film night loads of times to play Genshin. Seungmin will have a meltdown, you know what he’s like.”
Yeah, stuck up his own ass and sadly not stuck up yours. Wait, what? “So what do you suggest we do, Lix?”
“Mmm. Just…” Felix grabbed your drink, placing it on the floor softly. The other three boys didn’t even blink at the movement, still enraptured by the film. His hands were quick to return to yours, pulling them under the blanket covering you both and placing your dominant hand on his length. “Touch me a bit? Please? Not enough to cum, can’t make a mess, just- just need something.”
You considered it. Would they even notice? Your eyes went to the other boys present in the room. Jisung was sobered up by quite a lot, thanks to Seungmin’s water, but he was still loving the film, cuddled up to Minho. It was quite cute. You kind of wanted to cuddle Minho, but you had hot bitch summer duties to complete. Seungmin was on the complete other end of the couch, but his legs were splayed across Jisung’s. He looked just as into the film, taking sips of his drink every now and again. Minho’s eyes met yours, and he gave you a soft smile. Okay, so no one had suspected anything. You could touch Felix a bit. 
Turning your attention back to the film, you shifted slightly so you could run your hand over Felix’s clothed length. His reaction was instant, pulling his joggers down so you could touch his bare skin. You almost laughed at how eager he was, desperate almost, but you had to play it cool so that no one knew. You wrapped a hand around his length, tight and warm, using the precum for lubrication as you pumped up and down his length.
Felix leaned back, his jaw dropping in an almost silent sigh as his legs spread further for you. You were so glad the blanket was so thick, covering your actions, and you were also glad that the television was on so loud - the unmistakable wet noises of Felix’s dick right now could be hidden by the other noises in the room. Not to you, though. You could hear the sound as your hand rapidly stroked his cock, making his toes curl in his socks and your pussy get unbelievably wet at the sound. 
You shifted awkwardly, trying to alleviate the quickly growing pressure between your thighs. You couldn’t get horny, not here, not now - if you both started doing anything more than what you were doing, the boys would be sure to notice. Or… were they really too interested in this film? It was awful, to be honest. You’d seen it before too, or maybe you’d just seen a million films just like it. 
The deciding factor was Felix starting to buck his hips up just slightly into your hand, fucking the tight ring of your fingers. It made your clit throb, swollen and needy in your pyjama shorts. Fuck it.
You grabbed Felix’s hand on your thigh, leading it to your core. He shot forward instantly, chest almost fully pressed to your back but leaving you enough room to carry on touching his cock. Heavy breaths were panning across your neck and he just let you guide your hand to your pussy, passing your pyjama shorts completely. Felix’s breath hitched when he noticed you’d foregone underwear. 
Dainty fingers swiped through the wetness coating your folds, making you spread your legs so that they were splayed across his. He used the wetness from your hole, dragging it up to your clit and rubbing in precise, damp circles across your swollen bud. You wanted to moan, writhe, even beg - you couldn’t do anything, not in your current presence.
“Lixie, your room, please-?” You whispered hastily.
Just as Felix was about to reply, another voice spoke from the other sofa. “I mean, seriously, I’ve fucked you enough times and you think I wouldn’t notice that expression you get when you’re horny?” Minho. Both of your heads spun around to face him. Jisung was staring at you, eyes blown wide and a tent in his pants. Minho was smirking. Of course he was. Seungmin’s face was again normal, lips in a straight line, but his head was cocked to the side and perhaps he looked… intrigued? 
“Um…” You blurted, quite unintelligibly. Your hand had paused on Felix’s cock, and his hand had dropped out of your pyjama shorts completely. 
“Blanket off. You can at least show us, yeah? Don’t hide that pretty cock from us,” Minho said, nodding towards the offending fabric. Felix sounded like he’d choked on air, length twitching against your lower back. He liked that. “We all want to see. You may as well let us watch you fuck. We’re all gonna have seen that pussy at some point anyway.”
Your eyes flitted to Seungmin again. He was smirking now, a teasing expression on those plump lips that looked ever-so-soft. Just as you began to splutter out some excuses, Felix ripped the blanket off of the both of you, exposing your naked legs and the wet spot forming on your pyjama shorts. Jisung’s eyes immediately went down to the damp patch. His eyes widened almost comically, staring at your clothed pussy like it was a flourishing oasis in the middle of the driest desert. 
Seungmin spoke up, then, leaning leisurely back against the sofa. “Why don’t you two kiss a bit? I know you’ll both get worked up. Both of you are fucking pathetic like that.”
Felix whined, tugging your hair back to press a firm kiss against your lips. You shifted in his lap, moving so you were facing him and straddling. The movement exposed his cock to the rest of the room, full length now steadily leaking white rivulets of precum down to his balls that sat heavy between his legs. Surprisingly, Felix pinned you to the sofa, the act of dominance making you whimper into the kiss. His tongue was heavy in your mouth, pressing against yours with the promise of something more. Your best friend kissed blazingly, filthy, messy exchanges of spit. It ignited the fire deep inside your gut, making you consider his preferred dynamics in bed - he was currently pinning you into the sofa, but he’d been so quick to be Minho’s good boy. 
Your ears perked up at Seungmin speaking again. “God, will you just entertain him before he cums in his pants?” Pants? Felix’s dick was out, so… who was he talking about?
You broke the kiss and turned in just enough time to witness what was probably the most erotic scene you’d ever laid eyes on. Jisung was tugging on Minho’s t-shirt sleeve, looking up at him with watering, pleading doe eyes, and Seungmin was scoffing condescendingly at him. The tent in Jisung’s trousers was pitched even bigger than it was earlier on, and Minho was smiling softly at Jisung. With a quick move, Minho gripped Jisung by his chin and pressed his thumb into his mouth. Jisung whined, blinking rapidly up at Minho until Minho finally forced his tongue between Jisung’s pretty lips. 
Subconsciously, you started to push down onto Felix, trying to get some friction yourself. Hyunjin had been right, then - they’d all fucked around with eachother before, and that was probably why they were all more than willing to fuck around with you. 
Minho pulled away from the sloppy kiss with Jisung, Jisung’s mouth trying to follow. Minho’s feline eyes settled on you, cocking his head to the side. You knew your cheeks were burning with lust and there was no way the boys on the opposite sofa hadn’t noticed your hips begging for some alleviation to the pressure between your legs. Minho snorted out a condescending laugh once his eyes had taken your full figure in. “I should’ve known you’d like that. You’re so fucking filthy. You’ve got one cock between your legs, ready to pound you and you’re still looking at me and Jisung like that?”
“They can have more cocks if they want,” Jisung mumbled. “Can I? Please?”
“Mmm, not yet, Sungie,” Minho brushed a hand through his hair, looking almost too fond. You turned your attention back to Felix, where he was looking just as debauched and horny at you at the sight of his two friends kissing. “Lix, strip. You too, Y/N.”
You scrunched up your face. “Who are you to call the shots? This is mine and Lix’s night, actually. Nothin’ to do with you,'' You knew you were being petty - beyond petty actually. You just loved doing things for a response. It was always something that was in your nature. You saw Minho turn to Seungmin, before Seungmin let out a small, mirthless chuckle. 
“Think I’m gonna need your help here, Seungmin. We’ve got three desperate babies wanting to play, huh?”
Seungmin sighed, stretching his arms above his head. He almost looked like he didn’t want to be there, but you could see the hint of an erection in his trousers. He rolled his head to the side, humming. “I suppose I can help you out,” He looked towards you, getting up and stalking over to the sofa you and Felix were situated on. Felix had leaned back, pulling at his clothes frantically as if the soft fabric was offending him. Seungmin yanked his hand into your hair, pulling your hair back with zero delicacy.
You positively squealed. “Fuckin’- ow?!”
“Do not fuck with me. Strip, or you’re getting absolutely nothing tonight. You hear me?” You blinked up at him. Seungmin, who was strangely cute but ever so quiet. He glared at Minho over his cereal quite frequently, but you had seen Jeongin cuddled up to him taking a nap more than once. He loved Pochacco, the cute little dog character from Sanrio, and you’d actually known him with braces for a part of your life. Seungmin, who had now revealed himself to be a super hard dom - and you were actually a little bit scared to disobey him. The arousal outweighed the fear by megatons, though. 
You tried to nod at him, but his fingers wrapped into your hair were just too tight. Trying to move only burned at your scalp, and Seungmin raised an eyebrow at you, a smile on his lips. Oh, he wanted you to speak. Right. Felix groaned, one hand going to wrap around his length to try and settle some of the burning desire. You could hear wet noises from the other room - presumably Minho was keeping Jisung occupied with his mouth. “Y-Yes. Just, let go and I can-”
“Sorry?”
“I- I’m sorry, Seungmin. Yes, could you please let go so I can strip for Lix? Please?” Seungmin let his hand drop from your hair rather unceremoniously, making your head drop to the armrest with a dull ‘thud’. You quickly shimmied your t-shirt and pyjama shorts off, leaving you completely bare, tummy raising and falling with your deep breaths. Felix’s eyes were blown wide, instantly moving over you to settle between your legs and pump his cock steadily in a tight fist. His head dropped to your neck, mouthing wet kisses over the skin and starting a hickey into your collarbone. 
“Gonna- gonna push in, okay? Ready?” Felix questioned, raising his head up to look at you. You nodded eagerly, wrapping your legs around his waist and shifting so his cockhead was positioned at your dripping wet hole. All of a sudden, Felix blinked out of his haze, turning to Seungmin. “Can I-?”
Seungmin raised an eyebrow again, hand palming the bulge over his joggers. “Can you what?”
“Can I… can I fuck them, please?” Felix whispered. Jisung moaned at a high pitch into Minho’s mouth at the statement, and when you turned to examine the pair, Jisung was grinding on Minho’s thick thigh and working himself up to a frenzy. He wasn’t even kissing Minho back, just moaning against his plush lips while Minho shoved his tongue into his mouth. You were almost proud of Jisung for hanging onto sanity a lot better than you had when on his lap.
Seungmin hesitated, looking to be contemplating before he nodded swiftly, just as unaffected. Felix groaned loudly, murmuring affirmations as he thrusted his length into you fully in one flurry of movement. He paused, giving you time to adjust - but your pussy was already so slick for the whole situation that you were clawing down his back after a few seconds, whining for more.
“Lixie- please move, move, please, need it,” You begged, eyes watering. Felix nodded eagerly, kissing the space under your eyes before he started to thrust steadily into you. His balls slapped against your ass cheeks, making the flesh ripple like a strong, dramatic wave in the sea. “Oh, oh yeah, oh yeah, Lixie. Just like that, baby boy. Just like that, yeah? So good for me.”
Felix whimpered, his head dropping to the crook of your neck. You felt a string of drool from his lips to your skin, making you moan and clench around him at the all consuming feeling of his pleasure. “‘S good? Am I good?”
You felt the signature lowering of an added body on the sofa, of whom you quickly recognised as Seungmin when he spoke. “Such a good boy, Lixie. Unfortunately, I can’t say the same for the pussy you’re fucking.”
“Hey!” You grumbled. Seungmin pinched the side of your thigh sharply, his nails pinching into your flesh and making you jump. “Seungmin-!”
“Oh my God, just shut the fuck up? Lee Minho,” Seungmin sighed out, rolling his eyes behind Lix’s shoulder. The sunshine boy was suddenly grinding into you instead of thrusting, the soft curls of pubic hair on his pubis grinding against your clit pleasantly. His head was thrown back, eyes rolled back into his head. Minho hummed in response, pulling back from Jisung with a wet sound. “Have your toy come and stuff your new toy’s mouth for me. I’m sick of hearing the fucking complaints.”
Minho chuckled. “My baby fucking my favourite toy’s mouth? Sounds fucking lovely to me. Go on, Sungie, you can have it,” You heard stuttered footsteps behind you and then Jisung’s round cheeks were looming over you, round eyes blinking frantically. His lips were kiss bitten and he was eagerly pulling his joggers down to his ankles, revealing his thick cock in front of your eyes. You let yourself smile fondly up at the boy above you.
He grinned back, all pearly teeth showing. “Hey bestie. Can I fuck your mouth? Lookie, ‘m hard, and you were so mean last time.” 
“Can’t be mean to you when your dick’s in my mouth, Sungie,” You retorted, clenching with approval when Lix shifted his hips just right and the tip of his cockhead kissed your cervix. When your jaw dropped open with a moan, you managed to stutter out a response. “C’mere, Sungie. In my mouth.”
Jisung excitedly pressed his length into your open mouth. He was clearly delighted at the idea of being rough with you, because he immediately started fucking your mouth with fervor. You weren’t really responding, just letting unabashed moans and whines fall out of your mouth and be muffled by your friend’s cock. The feeling of Felix fucking you deep and Jisung fucking your throat was too much - you felt used, like a toy while Minho and Seungmin orchestrated the scene and you loved it. You caught sight of Seungmin playing with Felix’s nipples, whispering filthy words into his ear, and all of a sudden, Minho sat behind where you were situated on the sofa. He stroked your hair, pressing a kiss to your forehead while he sat on the floor, looking down at you over the low edge of the armrest.
He was mumbling into your skin, nuzzling with a smile. “Pretty little slut, huh? So good for me, fucking my boys like this.”
“Stop being so soft,” Seungmin scoffed. “You know they can take it.”
“I want to be soft with them, thanks,” Minho rolled his eyes in the signature Minho style. You wanted to smile, but Jisung’s cock steadily thrusting your throat was prohibiting your lips from any movement. When Jisung’s hand fell to the back of your head, trying to force your head deeper - in all honesty, you don’t know where he got the audacity - Seungmin leaped over the couch, grabbing Jisung’s hands behind his back. You whined at the sight of Jisung’s submissive nature, and Felix whined at the loss of Seungmin’s hands on his nipples, stopping all movement of his hips.
Jisung pulled out of your mouth, letting his cock bob in front of your face with a loud groan. Seungmin had presumably pulled him back. You took the opportunity to turn to Felix, pouting. “Why’d you stop?”
“I- I was enjoying having my nipples played with, to be honest,” Felix mumbled. “I like to be overstimulated like that.”
“You know what else he likes?” Seungmin quipped. “Finger his ass, Y/N. He’s been so good, give that to him, yeah?”
You scoffed. Maybe the fight wasn’t out of you yet. “Why don’t you fucking do it?”
“Um, because my hands are fucking occupied. Watch your mouth. God, this is why I don’t fuck brats.”
“That’s why you fill your brat’s mouth up,” Minho said all too happily, grinning menacingly in juxtaposition. “Sungie, baby. Back to where you were, yeah?”
Jisung immediately shot forward, pushing his length back into your mouth. He started fucking your mouth without abandon, just as you decided to give in. Felix had been good, after all. 
You crept one hand around his back, letting it drift down to between his asscheeks. Using some of your wetness that had dripped down to his balls, you swept it up with your fingers and pushed your middle finger into his little asshole.
The reaction was immediate. Felix positively whined, his head thrown back. He started fucking into you again, whispering sweet nothings to you in lieu of a thanks.
“Yeah, yeah, so good, baby- a-ah, yeah! There,” Felix shifted, rocking his hips back between your finger and your tight hole. You loved the feeling, eyes rolling back into your head at the push and pull.
Minho suddenly shuffled around the sofa, landing right where your core was stretched tight around Felix’s cock. “Move back, baby.”
You and Felix both shifted, leaving a slight bit more of a gap between your tummies, still allowing your finger to thrust into him shallowly. Minho ducked down, and all of a sudden, his tongue was laving all over the area where your two erotic areas met over and over in a wet, loud exchange. You whined when his tongue brushed over your engorged clit, and Jisung’s thrusts stuttered in your throat before he pulled out. 
“That’s- That’s so fucking hot, what the fuck, I-?” Jisung wrenched his hands away from Seungmin’s hold, using a hand to slap his cockhead on your tongue. You wanted to scold him, but just as the words started to form, Jisung’s tip was shooting out warm, white cum on your tongue. You moaned, curling your tongue around the tip to catch it all. Being used like this and feeling your favourite’s lips sucking on your clit? Yeah, you were gonna cum very soon.
Minho’s head shot up at the sound of Jisung’s cum, feline eyes narrowing. His tongue shot out to lick his bottom lip. “Don’t be greedy, Y/N. Remember you have to share.” 
Jisung immediately ducked down, moaning as your tongue met his and you swapped his own seed between you. Your hips bucked up when Jisung gripped your chin with his hand, just like Minho had done earlier to him. You pulled your head away from Jisung, hand coming up to grip onto the arm rest and your finger stilling inside Felix. Minho’s thumb went down to your clit, rubbing firm, precise circles. He knew your body too well by now.
“G-Gah, fuck, gonna cum, I’m- please, please,” You whined, hips shifting upwards. Felix nodded.
“Gonna make you cum, baby, I promise,” He was groaning in his deep voice, making your pussy clench and gush more wetness at the timbre. His voice had honestly always had a bit of an effect on you. You vaguely registered Seungmin taking Jisung back to the other couch, but your eyes were hazy and unfocused. 
“I can’t- I can’t cum until- please, please, please! ‘S so good, I can’t hold it in, I’m gonna fucking cum, I-“
“Who exactly are you begging, Y/N?” Minho tugged your head back, making you whine and kick your legs around in an attempt to avoid your orgasm. Felix hadn’t stopped fucking you, hips bouncing to fulfill your orgasm fully. 
You felt tears start to brim at your eyes, threatening to fall. “You? Fuck, you! You, Minho, can I? I fucking can’t hold on! It feels too good!”
Minho clicked his tongue, shaking his head in disapproval. “Nope. Felix fucked you dumb, my dumb little baby? You beg Seungmin.”
You whined, shaking your head before the words came tumbling out of your mouth. “Seungmin! Seungmin- Minnie, Minnie, please can I? Please, please, sir?” 
Seungmin laughed from across the room, a loud chuckle that made you squeal again. Your tears were falling now, unashamed, your cunt clenching around Felix tight enough to make his own tears brim as he tried to hold off his orgasm. 
“Sir?” Seungmin chirped. “I prefer master, but okay. Only because you seem like you couldn’t handle a punishment tonight, you can cum.”
You almost wanted to beg for a punishment, mind blurred as you just thought of trying to prove yourself to Seungmin. What the fuck? You couldn’t stop your own body when it heard the command, cunt clenching tight around Felix and causing your jaw to drop in a silent scream. A white ring of cum was formed around the base of Felix’s cock, soaking into the soft hair. You felt your eyes roll back, toes curling into the sofa, and Felix groaned deeply. Hot cum filled your pussy, creaming your walls nice and full of his seed. 
A blistering heat crawled up your back and - shit, you’re still fucking cumming? You whined when Felix tried to pull out, needing something to ride your orgasm out on. 
“I got them. Go on, Lixie,” Minho spoke softly. When Felix’s length pulled out of you, three of Minho’s fingers entered into your hole and kept you full. You whined as your orgasm finally started to subside, legs shaking and sniffing back tears. Felix had collapsed to your side, giving you a quick kiss on the cheek before kissing up a few tears. Your eyes fluttered shut with exhaustion.
When you came to consciousness, you were wrapped up in the same pink fluffy blanket that had started it all. Jisung was perched quite happily munching on cereal straight from the box and Felix was giggling next to him, both in just their joggers. Seungmin was sitting upright next to you, fingers stroking through your hair. 
“Wha… huh?” You blinked, looking up at Seungmin. Instead of speaking, he shifted you upright, pressing a water bottle to your lips and letting you glug a few helpful servings down. Once you felt quenched, you pushed his hand away softly. Or nudged it, in your blanket burrito. “What are you doing…?”
“Aftercare. You passed out after you came, and I was pretty mean so I think you went into subspace a little. How are you feeling?” Seungmin was speaking… to you? What? You decided to take it in your stride. He was cute, after all, and he’d dommed the fuck out of you with just words.
“I’m okay. Thank you, Seungmin,” You smiled teasingly. He rolled his eyes, but you could see the playful nature behind it this time. “You’re pretty nice, huh?”
“Only to nice people. I mean, you did pretty well there. I was… proud of you. You were really good, Y/N,” He was looking at you, giving you a genuine smile. You preened at the comment, before noticing a presence missing in the room. Seeing you looking around, Seungmin grinned. “He’s cooking. Do you think he’ll actually make me a plate this time?”
You scoffed. “No chance. You’re like a divorced couple.”
“So we’ve been told,” Seungmin mused. He turned to you again. “I’m glad you had a good time. I’m glad you’re having a good time. Okay?”
So many words were unspoken, but so many words were conveyed in the one sentence he told you. He wasn’t disgusted by you, not at all. He was just… like that. He was just Seungmin. You could finally understand why the others liked him. You nodded in response. 
“Oh, and he wants round two. He’s upset he didn’t get to fuck you with the guys watching, so you better wash up. Or don’t, he’s probably into it.”
You nudged Seungmin with your shoulder teasingly, and he smiled at you again. 
Felix was staring at you, before he walked over to you and threw himself into your lap. You were still in a blanket cocoon, fabric up to your chin like a sausage sitting upright. It was such a familiar action that it made you smile. “Did I make you feel good, bestie? I bet I was soooo worth the wait.”
You groaned, stomping your feet and trying to nudge Felix off. He simply giggled, thrashing around on your lap in happiness. “I’m gonna go find Minho, get off me.”
Felix hopped off and helped you up in your blanket burrito, smiling at you and ruffling your already messy hair. “Please don’t fuck while he’s cooking our food! Love you.”
You giggled. “Love you too, Lixie.” 
Shuffling into the kitchen, you saw Minho standing there, an apron wrapped around his slim waist as he chopped up vegetables. Raising an eyebrow at his ass in his joggers, you couldn’t help but feel the heat returning to your tummy. As if he could feel your presence, Minho turned to you, smirking and looking you up and down in the blanket like you were the sexiest thing he’d ever seen.
Oh, yeah. You met his eyes, licking your lips. You wanted a good round with your favourite, and you needed it yesterday.
˚ʚ♡ɞ˚
taglist: @moasworld @hopefulrascalstatesmantoad @queenofthegardengnomes @boomfrogg @hoeinthehouse @msaddictions @sunnyhonie @hizliyuruyen @jyu037 @jouoy @drhsthl @seungincore @jellylver @veedoesntknaur @meloncremesoda @k-poplv @livieloo914 @fekixfmp @fawnpeaks @minnielvr @imastraykidsfan @hanjisung2023 @hoelynecujoh @kyrviu @sxgeofprohets @everydreams-penumbra @chaneomma @kkissreol @phtogravi @secretjj @princelingperfect @personawthai @dirah-h @straykids5star @luvhyux @chuuswifereal @stg110 @cookiesandmilfx @number1seungminstan @skzswife @starsandrqindrops @poody1608 @cutiespaghetti @hwa-0403 @i8rsie @kpopsstuffs @everyonehatesshani @han8ul @velentine143 @vixensss @cuddlehye @sheeshhhhfelixsworld @angeldhd @comicnerd557 @leeknowfz @imwithurmother @hrtsformin @maknae00 @teaholic @ficrecnctskz @tasteskz-sworld @ilychee08 @thehomotron8000 @romynochill @freckleboilix @yunhorights @marrivmel @realrintaro
1K notes · View notes