#Holiday Gifts for New Parents
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noisycowboyglitter · 5 months ago
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Get Festive with Nothing For You Ho: Funny Holiday Merchandise!
"Nothing For You Ho!" is a humorous and edgy take on holiday gift-giving, playing on the contrast between Santa's generosity and a more mischievous attitude. This phrase subverts the expectation of holiday cheer with a playful, slightly naughty tone.
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The expression could be used in various contexts, such as on novelty items like t-shirts, mugs, or decorations. It might appeal to those with a sarcastic sense of humor or who enjoy poking fun at traditional holiday sentiments.
In some interpretations, it could be seen as a response to the idea of the "naughty list," implying that someone's behavior hasn't earned them any gifts. The use of "Ho" is a double entendre, referencing both Santa's iconic "Ho Ho Ho" and slang terminology.
This phrase might be incorporated into adult-oriented holiday parties, used in gag gifts, or as part of comedy routines that play with holiday themes. It's important to note that while some find this type of humor entertaining, others might consider it inappropriate or offensive.
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"Nothing For You Ho!" represents a trend in holiday humor that blends festive references with more adult-oriented comedy, appealing to those who enjoy a less conventional approach to celebrating the season.
"Dirty Santa Offensive Christmas" refers to an adult-oriented twist on holiday celebrations that pushes the boundaries of traditional festive norms. This concept combines elements of the popular "Dirty Santa" gift exchange game with intentionally provocative or risqué themes.
Participants in such events might exchange gifts that are humorous, sexually suggestive, or deliberately inappropriate for typical Christmas gatherings. The atmosphere is likely to be filled with raucous laughter, edgy jokes, and a deliberate flouting of holiday conventions.
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Decorations and activities may parody traditional Christmas elements in shocking or subversive ways. Costumes might include revealing or humorously offensive versions of classic holiday characters.
It's important to note that this type of event is strictly for adult audiences who enjoy provocative humor. While some find it entertaining, others may consider it distasteful or offensive. Participants should be aware of the potentially controversial nature of such gatherings.
First Christmas gifts are special presents given to celebrate someone's inaugural holiday season. These might be for newborns experiencing their first Christmas, couples celebrating their first holiday together, or individuals marking their first Christmas in a new home or country. These gifts often carry sentimental value and may
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become cherished keepsakes. Popular choices include personalized ornaments, baby's first Christmas outfits, photo albums, or custom jewelry. For couples, matching items or experience gifts are common. The focus is on creating lasting memories and starting new traditions, making these gifts particularly meaningful and heartfelt.
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blood-in-retroflex · 2 months ago
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google: how does one tell people I don't celebrate without pretending to be jewish or a johovas witness?
#people assume i'm jewish and ask me my hanukkah plans#like people have spent their whole lifes watch hundreds of movies hey look we cure the grumpy anti-spirit of Christmas man#and i wasn't raised relgious so it doesn't bug me to not cuz I only ever did the secular-ish version anyways#Every year all my friend forget and try to fix me and tell me I just need to make new memories are tell me I'm evil or something#we are adults you should be able to respect that I'm happier this way even if you don't understand#i just never vibed with christmas#it feels like everyone is a sleeper agent even jewish friends#i do new years#and like april fools day#and halloween#it shouldn't be that big a deal#but like it really triggers people#and they assume the worst about my parents which is so untrue#this year might go no contact with the first person who threatens me in response to my car rules#no Christmas music no weeb music no feet on the dash#i am not anti-christmas you can have your fun and I give gifts to friends#i just don't have a tree#or do antything special#and i don't want to go to your parent#i could fly to my parents#i'm not that broke#i'm just happier have a free wednesday to myself#yes i have christmas traumatic events but i felt this way before then#no body would care or notice if I didn't do easter#i know becuase i don't do easter unless it lines up with a vacation and I can see my parents#advice#holidays#christmas#the answer is lying isn't it i don't want to lie#i don't celibrate a religous holiday this time of year shouldn't be that hard
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its-okay-youre-adorable · 10 days ago
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Best Christmas presents this year!:
Number one definitely gonna be the backpack my dad gave me. It was his cherished backpack for ages. Back support, hip and sternum straps, pocketsss, you name it. I opened the backpack and a moth fluttered out like in a movie. The best Christmas present by far!
Ramen bowl full of Ramen socks. My 14yo brother really hit the nail on the head this year! I guess I do have that college student aura TM
Jar of peanut butter from Santa. Huge jar.
I saw this sketchbook in the local book store when my 17yo brother and I were Christmas shopping. It had a textured Starry Night cover and ooooo! It's not a lined journal! It's blank paper inside! and he bought it for me 🥹
19yo brother surprised me with a D&D book?? like I don't keep up too much on the discourse of new 5e is bad or whatever folks are saying these days, but I *love* having the physical books because *readability*
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killjoy-prince · 5 months ago
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Ray's After Ending is so funny because for a good chunk of it, most of the RFA members are knocked out by V's sleeping gas (Saeran is immune, Saeyoung isn't present bc he was kidnapped by his agency under his father's orders and MC wakes up in like an hour) but the game has a call feature where you can call the characters and it would be a waste if you couldn't use it bc the characters were unavailable so instead they have other people pick up the call (Jumin's driver picks up Jumin's phone, Jumin's father picks up Zen's phone, Yoosung's friends and mom pick up Yoosung's phone and Jaehee's coworkers pick up Jaehee's phone) and we do get to learn about the characters from outsider's point of view but it's so funny to me that these people are visiting their loved ones and suddenly the phone rings and they decide to just. answer it. and start talking to this stranger they've never met
#prince's talk tag#maybe its not actually weird people just pick up their loved one's phone call for them but i personally wouldn't#i cant stop thinking about how its Jumin's father that uses Zen's phone like Chief Han what were you doing in Zen's room??#i know they needed to assign somw character to Zen and he's not on speaking terms with his family#but I would of thought Chief Han would go to Jumin and the driver could go to Zen#does this mean something? am i thinking too hard about this?#also rip yoosung his friends and mom lowkey kinda dragging him in their call with you#and with the friends since one of them is a girl one of the options is like 'A girl?!?! are you dating??' and shes like 'no lolol'#'he's nice but i dont see him like that'#the main thing that made me make this post was thinking about Yoosung's mom saying how Jumin calls her sometimes and sends her holiday gift#like!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! idk man that just plays on a loop in my head#i know thats like a very professional thing to do. Jumin was raised to please people in a business capacity#and the he cares about the RFA so yea it makes sense. im sure he has gifts sent out to companies his works with#and I'm sure if the other members had a good relationship with their parents hed do the same with them#but in the RFA Yoosung and I guess V are the only ones with parents they talk to#idk if he sends a gift to V's father tho bc we never talk to him#but man. while i know hed do it with the other members if he could just the fact he does it with Yoosung is sweet#and it makes the part in Seven's route where he calls Yoosung's mom about her son's dilemma make sense to me bc they do talk once in a whil#so its not too out of the blue when he does it i guess#but man can we talk about how awesome Jaehee is? bc her coworker that picks up her phone spends every call gushing about her#like we knew she's great at her job but man hearing her coworker talk about her fills me with such love and admiration#and she's apparently really loved by the other assistants too like they all gush about her#jaehee is the best character in the game im not joking around#they wanna get close to her but bc she's their boss it's hard T_T#and the one that picks up the phone wishes Jaehee knows she was the one that stood with her overnight when she wakes#Yuni (the assistant you're talking to) says she would of quit the job had it not been for her#LIKE!!!!!!!! AAAAAAAAA!!!!#it was a nice way to use the call feature during the first two days of the characters not being awake to answer#and even though this is supposed to be the last thing you play before completing the whole game#you still learn something new about the characters you've known since day 1
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supercantaloupe · 1 year ago
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earlier tonight my roommates were talking about the halloween party they're planning in a couple weeks (i will be out of town) and since the convo went towards "party supplies needing to be purchased" one of my roommates mentioned that she had the present she's planning on getting me for my birthday in her digital shopping cart already and then made a little mischievous face at me. and like it's sweet i suppose but my idea of "celebrating" my birthday is basically acting like it doesn't exist cause i'm kind of...uncomfortable with receiving Direct Praise And Attention especially for things i don't think are worth it (for example, Existing Another Year). at any rate my idea of the perfect gift this year would be Not being stuck in rehearsal until 10pm that night but that will certainly not be the case so whatever
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thegreatchristmasheist · 1 year ago
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New Children’s Picture Rhyming Book, “The Great Christmas Heist,” is Destined to Become a Timeless Classic
“The Great Christmas Heist” teaches children to celebrate Christmas as the joy of giving.
Available on www.agreatchristmasbook.com and Barnes and Noble.
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arctic-hands · 2 years ago
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[Image Description: initial tweet by Jesuro, @ JesuroKun. It's says, in allcaps, "Hey artists what does your family think about your art". Beneath the tweet is a screencap of Skipper, the CGI Adelie (?) Penguin from the Madagascar movies and the Penguins Of Madagascar cartoon series. He is popping out from a hole in a wooden box, pointing a flipper straight ahead and his beak open in speech. In reply, kosa [cannot tell what that emoji is on my phone, it's a red rectangle at an angle] 305, @ KosoNah, tweets "My dad saw my skill in art and said I should have y into NFTs and I said no, those are scams. And he said 'I know. I want you to scam people'". End I.D.]
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toruandmidori · 2 months ago
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JINGLE ME TIMBERS!
Apparently Christmas is also for kids! Who knew.
Treat the little landlubber in your life to a cute festive onesie this holiday season.
Great baby’s first Christmas gifts. 
Buy online here.
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lokissweater · 1 month ago
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birthday boy!satoru who sleepily grins and smiles when you wake him up with a giant cake and gifts in bed, slowly propping himself up on an elbow and rubbing his eyes, your sweet soft voice singing him ‘happy birthday’ as he looks at you with a little gleam in his eyes.
birthday boy!satoru who devours the cake you bought him right then and there, refuses to go to the dining room table or get plates and refuses to let you leave the room, a fork in each of your hands as you both munch on his frosty vanilla bean cake, satoru’s eyes lightning up like stars once he sees that his precious pretty wife also got him kikufuku, his hands shooting out to tear open the packaging and stuff two in his mouth at once, feeding you one in return and him poking your puffed up cheeks with a shiny grin because you’re just oh so cute.
birthday boy!satoru who still refuses to let you leave his side once you’ve both cleared the desserts, his arms snaking around your waist and gently pulling you to lay on top of him, your bellies full and the sugar swirling in your heads proving no match for satoru as he raises a sneaky hand, fingers looping and pulling at the thin straps of your top down to devour you next, his favorite dessert, you squirming and giggling as you try to swat his hands away and tell him no…. but you let him have a little taste anyways, it’s his birthday after all! 
birthday boy!satoru who hasn’t even taken a peak at his presents because he just wants you, licking you up like the icing he licked off of his fingers just a few minutes prior, wet slick tongue running from the side of your neck down to your puffy plump tits as you prop yourself up, hands on his bare chest and with a shudder to your breath.
birthday boy!satoru who slobbers hickeys into your tits and sucks your nipples like a freak, you whining pushing at his chest and telling him he’s sucking too hard, and him only giving you a muffled ‘but it’s my birthday sweets!’ before sucking harder and taking advantage of your cute boobs, his big hands gripping your upper arms to keep you up and still.
birthday boy!satoru who finally listens to your protests about how you have plans made for him and you need to get going, a pout to his pretty face and dramatically moaning about how he wanted ‘morning birthday sex’ from his wife, but his face quickly switching back to that loving silly grin you love so much as soon as he sees you giggle and smile.
birthday boy!satoru who is bouncing off the walls when you tell him you got tickets to the new winter wonderland festival that’s in your town, him wanting to go since practically birth (last year) and talking your ear off about it ever since then, sprinting out of bed and putting on his pants and thin sweatshirt.
birthday boy!satoru who pouts again when you drag him back in the house because his attire is not fit for the weather outside, and pouts still as you’re bundling him up in a thicker puffer jacket, his cheeks going pink once you press a sweet kiss to his jutted out lips and chasing yours for more, obnoxious kissy noises filling the air.
birthday boy!satoru who nearly collapses upon arriving at the winter wonderland festival, the name doing itself justice with the holiday decorations strewn about and pinecone ornament filled garlands hanging from every post lamp, the particularly snowy day adding to the christmas feel as he quickly interlaces your fingers together and drags you around.
birthday boy!satoru who gets in line to meet santa, scoffing over the weird looks the parents in line were giving him as you laughed, him muttering something about how it’s discrimination to be judged like this just because he’s not a kid, and that his christmas wish list was just as important as a five year olds.
birthday boy!satoru who jumps on the old man’s lap with a huge smile, santa’s alarmed eyes darting in every corner as your husband went on about the things he wanted (mainly sweets), not a single ounce of giving a shit in his body because it was his day.
birthday boy!satoru who finishes off his christmas wish list with ‘oh! and for my wife to never divorce me! yeah put that one at the top actually—’
birthday boy!satoru who refuses to let you treat him the entire day, saying he was satoru gojo and that he was made of money for you to spend, you playfully rolling your eyes as he got gingerbread cookie after gingerbread cookie for you, and the one time you show up with peppermint kikufuku, he kisses your cheek over and over a million fucking times in gratitude.
birthday boy!satoru who by the end of the day is spent from hours worth of eating sweets and desserts and riding the kiddy rides, requesting to get on the ferris wheel one more time just as the two of you were leaving to go home.
birthday boy!satoru who has an arm around your shoulders and a cheek on the side of your head on the ferris wheel, his heart fuzzy and warm despite the chilling temperature of the night, all due to precious little you that made his day so special in the way that you did, in the way that you do every year that makes him absolutely melt and feel worthwhile.
birthday boy!satoru who cups your cheek and brings you in, pressing a tender kiss to your lips amongst the glittering lights, music, and laughter of the festival below, feeling borderline emotional over the fact that he’s married to such a beautiful person like you.
“will you marry me baby?”
“toru we’re already married—”
“oh so you want to divorce me then—”
birthday boy!satoru who leaves the festival with you hand in hand, and with a new found sense of energy because his sugar filled brain managed to remember the promise you made him this morning, one that had to do with sexy time upon arriving home, his hands literally harassing you the entire car ride home with them shoved down your shirt or a needy squeeze to your thighs.
birthday boy!satoru who deems this the best birthday he’s ever had in his life.
but birthday boy!satoru knows that he has the best birthdays of his life every year actually, and knowing that they were ever since he met and married you, for they were never this sweet before.
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authors note: happy birthday to my glorious honored one OH how i need him <333 :33
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silhouettecrow · 1 year ago
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365 Days of Writing Prompts: Day 365
Adjective: Gentle
Noun: Reaper
Definitions for those who need/want them:
Gentle: having or showing a mild, kind, or tender temperament or character; moderate in action, effect, or degree, or not harsh or severe; (of a slope) gradual; (archaic) (of a person) noble or having the qualities attributed to noble birth, or courteous and chivalrous
Reaper: a person or machine that harvests a crop; short for Grim Reaper
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Goodnight everyone!! I love you!! 💕
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noisycowboyglitter · 5 months ago
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Softball Baseball Catcher: The Perfect Funny Christmas Outfit!
Softball Baseball Catcher Funny Christmas is a playful and unique holiday theme that combines the love of America's favorite pastime with festive cheer. This concept is perfect for softball or baseball enthusiasts, particularly catchers, who want to infuse their passion for the sport into their holiday celebrations.
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Buy now:19.95$
Imagine a Christmas tree adorned with ornaments shaped like baseballs, softballs, catcher's mitts, and home plates. Tinsel could be replaced with strings of miniature bats, while the tree topper might be a golden catcher's mask. Stockings hanging by the fireplace could resemble catcher's leg guards, stuffed with baseball-themed goodies.
Gift ideas might include funny t-shirts with slogans like "Santa's Favorite Catcher" or "Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Catcher," featuring a reindeer in full catching gear. Other humorous presents could be coffee mugs printed with "Warning: May Spontaneously Talk About Catching" or a festive catcher's mitt-shaped oven mitt for holiday baking.
Decorations around the house might include wreaths made of softballs, garlands of baseball cards, and mistletoe hanging from a batting helmet. For the dinner table, placemats could feature baseball diamond designs, while napkin rings resemble tiny baseball bats.
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This theme allows catchers and baseball/softball fans to showcase their love for the game during the holiday season, creating a unique and memorable Christmas experience that combines humor, sport, and festive spirit.
Gifts for Boyfriends Parents are thoughtful presents chosen to make a good impression and show appreciation for the people who raised your significant other. These gifts often require careful consideration, as they can help strengthen your relationship with your partner's family.
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Popular options include elegant home decor items, such as high-quality picture frames or tasteful vases. Gourmet food and drink baskets featuring artisanal cheeses, wines, or local specialties can be well-received. For more personal touches, consider custom photo albums or books related to their interests.
Experience gifts, like concert tickets or restaurant gift cards, can create opportunities for shared memories. Tech-savvy parents might appreciate smart home devices or digital photo frames.
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When selecting gifts, it's crucial to consider the parents' tastes, hobbies, and lifestyle. It's also wise to consult with your boyfriend about any family traditions or gift-giving norms. The goal is to choose presents that are respectful, thoughtful, and demonstrate your genuine interest in building a positive relationship with his family.
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noawritesreviews · 1 year ago
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Baby Holiday Gifts
What kind of presents are we getting for baby this year? I'd love to hear your thoughts... Here are some ideas I had. What do you think?
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emperorsfoot · 2 months ago
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I just recalled a random memory this morning from when I was in scouts. I had a friend who’s mom was a devout catholic, but we were good friends through scouts. One year my friend wanted to give me a gift for Chanukah so their mom took us to Toys R Us together so I could pick out what I wanted. The mom handed my friend cash at the register so my friend could say they bought it and they paid a little extra for wrapping.
As we were leaving the mom said that I couldn’t open it until Christmas.
But my friend specifically said they were giving it to me for Chanukah. Chanukah that year was a week or two before Christmas (I don’t remember exactly) and the mom said that if I opened it before Christmas “Jesus would know”. I cannot stress enough that my friend wanted it to be a CHANUKAH present.
I’m dropped off at home and my friends mom tells my parents that I can’t open my present until Christmas, meanwhile my friend is in the back seat frustrated and almost shouting “Mom [Renkon] is Jewish!”
My dad just nods and says he understands. He’ll make sure I don’t open it until “the appropriate time”.
First night of Chanukah rolls around and my dad hands me the present and tells me to open it but don’t say anything to my friend until he has a chance to talk to their mother.
So I get to enjoy my toy FOR CHANUKAH like my friend intended.
Anyway, Christmas come and goes. Then new years, then on January 3rd my dad calls the mom and asks “what day does your holiday fall on this year? [Renkon] would like to open their present.”
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tbaluver · 29 days ago
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kiss me under the mistletoe- the love and deepspace men
pairings in order: xavier x reader, zayne x reader, rafayel x reader, sylus x reader genre: fluff fluff summary: spend the holidays by his side and share a kiss(es) under the mistletoe a/n: ty @ilovemitsuya for making me with the lads christmas dividers (˶ ˘ ³˘)ˆᵕ ˆ˶) and ty @ilovemitsuya and @deusfoundry for beta reading ! (ง ˃ ³ ˂)ว ⁼³₌₃⁼³
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⋆。‧˚ʚ♡ɞ˚‧。⋆
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Xavier:
“hmm?” his eyes flicker to the cluster of red berries on the christmas tree. he reaches his arm out and plucks it out of the christmas tree, examining it. “is this edible?”
you turn around after you finish tucking in the last flower in the tree and your gaze falls on xavier, who’s sniffing the mistletoe you carefully placed at the top of the tree.
you chuckle softly and gently take it from his hands. “no honey,” tucking back the mistletoe back into its rightful spot above you both. “it’s a mistletoe.”
you lost him there. xavier tilts his head, his brows furrowed in confusion. “mistle....toe?”
a smile tugs at your lips, christmas was completely new to him. you can’t help but step closer, standing on your tiptoes to brush a soft kiss on his lips right below the mistletoe. “when you stand below the mistletoe, you kiss someone next to you.”
xavier blinks, his expression shifting from confusion to realization with a smile now tugging on his lips. “ah i see,” he steps closer, his hands finding their way to your cheeks to pull you into a deeper kiss, melting into him.
however it seems xavier didn’t actually seem to actually understand. the next day as you two walk outside, xavier suddenly pulls you under a tree. he points up to a bunch of random red berries hanging from a branch above you both. “mistletoe.” you blink in confusion but before you can say anything, he pulls you in for a kiss, his lips warm against yours. and it happens again and again. he simply loves the idea of kissing you, no matter wherever you both are. you could correct him and point out the difference but you also love the idea of sharing a kiss with him whenever or wherever.
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Zayne:
zayne attempts to celebrate christmas. with parents who were renowned doctors and himself a surgeon, their schedules barely rarely lined up which never made it easy. to him, christmas didn’t feel like christmas at all. he works tirelessly in the operating room, creating his own miracles that day as he performs surgeries. more often he found himself spending the holidays alone, drinking hot cocoa ( with an insane amount of sugar ) while he read ahead on patient reports.
but deep down he knew something was missing and you managed to solve it for him and fill that missing void.
after many years, his old dusty christmas tree was pulled out from his storage and has finally been decorated in all its festive glory as you two carefully hung ornaments and placed finishing touches that made it feel more personal for the two of you.
the sweet delicious smell of the baked cookies fills the air as he carefully pulls them out of the oven. he begins to prepare the hot cocoa he makes every year, this time with a special plus one. he made sure to get the matching snowmen mugs that he knows you’ll love when he brings them out.
meanwhile as you gently place the gifts you wrapped for each other under the christmas tree, a playful idea sparks in your head. 
he hears your soft footsteps get closer as he preps the ingredients. “do you want any sugar in yours?” he asks, adding two spoonfuls of sugar to his cup and proceeding to add an extra spoonful to make it more sweet.
your heart flutters with excitement and your lips curl into a grin as you hold up a mistletoe above your heads. “another holiday tradition ,” rising up on your tiptoes as you lean in to plant a gentle kiss on his lips.
zayne’s lips curl into a small smile as you pull away. “do i really need a plant to get permission to kiss you this holiday?” he asks, shaking his head. he pulls you in closer, his hand guiding your jaw to draw you into a deep and sweet kiss.
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Rafayel:
humans are weird. chopping and dragging a perfectly happy tree into their homes and proceeding to adorn it with glittery things. rafayel never understood the appeal, that is until he met you.
he completely changes his mind about the entire holiday once he realizes that he gets to spend with you if you two celebrated the holiday together. so from this moment on, he declares that this year and every single year shall be spent together. maybe humans were on to something afterall..
a tradition that quickly became his favorite was holiday crafting with you. spending hours of creating your homemade ornaments and bursting with inside jokes as soft christmas music played in the background.
you two would dig up any embarrassing photos of each other to hang on the christmas tree. as you both carefully placed your last ornaments on the tree, a certain plant that you had purposely placed had caught your attention once again. and just below it was the perfect target.
as he continues going on about how silly you looked in the picture, you stepped closer to him, cutting him off mid-sentence and placing a soft quick kiss to his lips.
for a second you caught him completely off guard but his surprise melted into a sly smirk. “oh? someone feeling jolly or whatever the humans call it?” he teases, slightly leaning in more closer to you.
you giggle, pointing up to the mistletoe hanging directly above the both of you. “it’s a tradition,” you boop his nose. “you have to kiss someone when there’s a mistletoe above you.”
and just like that, christmas became rafayel’s favorite holiday.
the next morning as you both woke up, you woke up to something quite unexpected. it seems your lover was busy while you were asleep because every entry way of his studio and ceilings were decorated with mistletoes.
with a mischievous grin, he raises a brow. “guess you’re gonna have to kiss mee,” he teases while crossing his arms, “it’s a holiday tradition after all.” as you stood right below a mistletoe, his perfect and only target.
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Sylus:
sylus had never celebrated the holidays, ever. growing up it was just another day of surviving and now it was just another day to him. he never wrapped or given the perfect gifts for loved ones during this time until he met you.
the moment he saw the joy and excitement in your eyes as you talked about doing Christmas traditions with him, something inside him shifted. he couldn’t ignore how much it meant to you and who was he to deny you the chance to celebrate? he wanted to make this season special for you this year and every year.
giving it a chance, he transformed his home with you. every corner and every entry way of his home was decked out with some type of christmas spirit.
sylus bought a massive tree, one that’s slightly more taller as he was and with the perfect intention in mind. he wanted to lift you up so you could place the start on the top once it was fully decorated. the tree was wrapped in red and gold ornaments that you recommended would suit his taste and finished off with luxurious ribbons around it.
it was worth it. seeing the way your eyes sparkled and how wide your smile got made everything worth it. he finally understood there was more then just gift giving. it was spending time with someone you truly loved.
with a final tuck of the ribbon on the tree, sylus turns around, his eyes locking onto yours. you clear your throat softly, earning a raised brow from him in amusement as you step even closer. your fingers gently tug his shirt, signalling him to lean down to your level. without hesitation, he leans down slightly, his warm breath fans against your skin as  you press a soft and lingering kiss to his lips.
his eyes flutter open slowly, his lips curling into a smirk. “a reward sweetie?” 
you shake your head, a playful smile tugs at your lips as you point upward to the mistletoe you carefully placed above the tree. “it’s a tradition to kiss someone under the mistletoe sy,”
he lets out a breathy chuckle, his gaze flickering between you and the mistletoe. “well technically you’re under the mistletoe..” he teases, his height barely grazing the plant. “but,” he leans back down to your level again, his lips capturing yours in a deeper and more passionate kiss.
“is there a rule for how many times i can kiss you under the mistletoe?” he whispers against your lips.
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shjsnjkj · 2 months ago
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DAD'S BEST FRIEND┊l.hs
kinktober day 21! - masterlist
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warnings: smut, MDNI, unprotected sex, making out, nicknames, age gap
genre: smut
wc: 2,5k ✧.*
☆ heesung x reader ; Heeseung was your favorite person when you were a little girl, but after moving to a new country, you slowly started to forget him through the ages. Forget all his beautiful features, the memories you shared with him, and the song he sang to you the last night you saw him. Receiving little kisses and sleeping with him wasn't the same as you remembered either.
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When you were a little girl, your dad used to invite his best friend, Heeseung, over to your house every weekend, and you couldn’t have been happier. You loved him because he was always kind, and he brought you small yet sweetest gifts like chocolate, a plushie, flowers, hair clips, and other cutesy things. You ran into his arms, he picked you up and gave you a little peck on the cheek.
Heeseung adored you and treated you like his own little girl. That's why he surprised you with something nice on weekends, and you slowly started to feel like he was your family member.
In the summer you went on a holiday together to the sea. You built sand castles and played together in the sea. He stayed by your side all day, read you a goodnight story, and even slept with you after dinner when your parents went out to have a romantic dinner together. You felt never-ending joy throughout the whole week but little did you know, that this was the last time you would spend this much time together and be this close to him.
After the trip, your parents announced that you’ll be moving countries next month. Your little heart broke when you realized that you won’t see Heeseung anymore. You started crying.
“Dad I don’t want to go anywhere. I don’t want to say goodbye to uncle Hee.” -You cried holding his legs.
“Darling, you will see Heeseung, you don’t have to say goodbye forever”
“That’s not true, please let me stay here with him ”
And you were so right. After you had to say goodbye for almost 10 years, you slowly started to forget the hurtful, empty feeling that Heeseung left in your heart as you grew up. Furthermore, you made a lot of friends at the new place which also made you forget about the feeling of missing him. Searching him through the internet or asking his number from your parents was nowhere in your mind either.
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This summer you went to work in a cafe. Today was a usual day, you did all your tasks at your workplace until your dad called you up at the end of your shift saying that you’ll be going on a vacation 2 weeks later.
“Hello darling, just wanted to let you know that we’re going on a trip soon. So buy yourself something if you want. Tell me how much money you need and I’ll send it to you.” -then he hung up on you.
“Fine Dad, thank you for saying and listening to my answer as well.”
Right at that moment your phone started buzzing again.
“I forgot to mention that Heeseung will be joining us, he can finally take some weeks off of his company”
You froze at hearing Heeseung’s name. The last time you heard his name was the time when you said goodbye to him. It was around a decade ago. You remembered that moment so well. He gave small kisses on your head while you hugged him as tightly as you’ve never before. Oh gosh, just forget it for now. A-and what about his company? He probably has a wife and kids for now too. It won’t be the same as it used to be — you thought.
However, the real question was how should you act? How should you greet him? Or worse how will you talk to him?
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“Are you ready sweetheart?” -Your mother asked.
“Nuhuh” -you muttered under your breath- “Yes I am” - you screamed from your room.
“Let me take this from your hand” -Your dad said, putting your suitcase in the car.
You put up your headphones on your head and sit inside the car. The ride was quite long but you were busy guessing what will happen when you saw Heeseung. Will he treat you like a baby or will he remember you? How will you react after seeing him with his wife and children? Will you be alone for the whole trip? You didn’t know the answers to your questions. Slowly you saw the airport sign which helped you come back to reality and realize that it’s time to face Heeseung.
You stepped out of the car, got your suitcase, put your headphones down onto your neck, and headed inside the building with your family.
In less than 5 minutes you heard your dad’s voice, greeting Heeseung.
“Heeseung, long time no see, it’s good to see you again.”
You stayed aback, and looked down, not ready to meet him. But as soon as your name was called you turned your head to the left and your gaze met with Heeseung’s immediately.
There was he, in black jeans with a white shirt, and black sunglasses at the top of his head letting you see his brown bambi eyes for the first time after a while.
“Y/n come here, say hi to your uncle.” -He said sweetly.
You froze. Despite being the next to greet him you couldn’t take a step further.
Heeseung saw your shocked reaction so he decided to come instead and quickly greeted you with a warm hug as always. But this time you didn’t jump into his arms.
“Hello sweetheart, did you miss me? I missed you so much, you know?” -You just stood there still not moving but then it felt right to hug him back slowly, your hands staying on his back. His perfume and warmth made goosebumps all over your skin so you decided to take a step back.
“Don’t mind Y/n she’s a bit quiet these days.” -your dad told Heeseung.
“Ah, I understand. She grew up, I’m no longer her favorite uncle Hee.” -He showed you a sad expression and turned his gaze back to your dad.
No longer your favorite? And what if he’s still your favorite? What if you still love him deep inside just as much as when you were little?
You felt a pang of guilt for your cold reaction. Despite the years apart, Heeseung's warmth hadn't changed. Later, you wanted to say something, to show him he still meant a lot to you, but the words caught in your throat. Instead, you offered a small smile, hoping it conveyed what you couldn't express aloud before.
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As you boarded the plane together, you couldn't help but steal glances at Heeseung. His presence stirred up a mix of nostalgia and newfound curiosity. He looked almost the same like he didn’t age at all but he was more handsome in your eyes. You didn’t remember him looking like this but your relationship won’t be the same again, right?
Your parents sat at the first class (of course), Heeseung sat at the business class and here you were on the economy part stuffed between a lot of people. You were ready for the trip, feeling excited. You decided on sleeping after the plane took off, entering dreamland. After an hour you woke up and went to the washroom. It was locked. You waited for a few seconds then Heeseung stepped out of the cabin.
“Oh, hey Y/n. Are you here in the business class too?”
“Uhm, n-no. I’m in the economy class.”
“Why didn’t you tell me? I have an empty seat beside me. Come and sit with me, okay?” -He gave you a heart-warming smile and stroked your arm softly.
“Really? I mean, thank you Heeseung.” -his touch sent a shiver down your spine while you tried to get out a word from your mouth.
“Yeah, of course. By the way, there is no need to speak formally with me baby. Just call me Hee or anything you want as you did before.”
“Oh, okay ” -you blushed and looked down, couldn’t look into his eyes- “Then I’ll go and look for you when I’m done Hee” -the word Hee felt weird trailing off your lips but you tried to adjust to it.
After getting your stuff, you moved to the business class and searched for Heeseung. When you found him you sat down and made yourself comfortable. You thought about watching a movie to pass the time somehow until suddenly you switched your plans. You hesitated about this move but slowly reached Heeseung’s side and touched his arm. He immediately turned his gaze to you and gave you a soft smile.
“Do you want to talk for a few minutes? We talked a long time ago.” -you whispered.
“Of course Y/n! As long as you want.”
“First of all, sorry for behaving like that before. I didn’t mean to be rude or anything. I was shocked because it was the first time I saw you after 10 years.A-and..” -you stopped when he held your hand.
“You don’t have to say sorry Y/n. I fully get you. How about we make more memories this time to fill the gap of the past years? -your hands still in his.
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The first few days were amazing. Every morning you did your morning routine, dressed up in a bikini and a dress on top of that. Some days you let your hair fall down onto your shoulders and the other days you braided it. You packed your camera, and favorite book in your bag then you heard a few knocks on your door. It was Heeseung.
He went out with you every day to buy breakfast and eat it next to the sea. Those croissants were your favorite next to the cappuccino. You explored the village together while taking photos non-stop, and talking about everything you missed out from each other’s lives. After lunch, you bought some snacks and fruits to eat at the beach later. It made you feel nostalgic when you swam or jumped into the water together. Furthermore, sometimes you didn’t even realize when Heeseung took photos of you or accidentally you held hands.
Tonight, you went to a restaurant that had the perfect view to the coast and the village. You both admired how it was lit up by the moonshine and the pretty lights which made the night more beautiful.
“Do you remember when we were together like this years ago? Your parents had dinner, while we ate hamburgers with fries and a milkshake.” -he smiled brightly.
“I remember it too well…”
“Then we walked back together to the hotel and I slept with you after reading some goodnight stories and even played the guitar for you to sleep well.”
“Honestly, I can’t sleep well for years so I might ask you to sing something for me later.”
“Of course, princess but I have to ask you for something in return.”
“It depends on what would you ask.”
“Sleep with me.” -you choked on your drink.
“What?”
“Just like when you were younger. Nothing else just sleeping in the same bed. I miss that moment. That was the last vacation we spent together.”
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You did what you've agreed on. Heeseung played the guitar for you while you entered dreamland.
A few hours later, in the middle of the night, you felt an arm around your waist. There was no need to check who’s arm was that because you knew Heeseung stayed with you for the night.
“Uncle Hee” -you tried to turn around and face him which wasn’t quite easy due to his strong grip.
“Hm?” -he slowly opened his eyes.
“Can I be honest with you?”
“Go on baby”
“Do you think this is wrong what we’re doing?”
“What do you think Y/n? Do you feel like this is wrong?”
“Uhm I don’t know actually. This feels so right but..” -you looked down, thinking about how to say out your feelings.
"But? Baby, don’t think about anything right now just try to relax." -He gently cupped your face, his thumb tracing your cheek. "As you do that, I’ll make sure you don’t overthink what feels wrong or right." -His voice lowered as he leaned in, his lips hovering just inches from yours.
In that moment, time seemed to stand still. Your heart raced as Heeseung's lips finally met yours in a soft, tender kiss. It was everything you had dreamed of and more, a perfect blend of the familiar comfort he had always provided and the new, exciting feelings blossoming between you. As you melted into the kiss, you knew that there was no way back.
His large hands started caressing your body while he kissed your plump lips passionately. From the new sensual sensation, you couldn’t hold back your moans which only made Heeseung want more from you.
Then, he moved to your neck peppering them with loads of wet kisses. Gently, he turned you to your back and pulled up your nightgown to reveal and let him kiss your soft bare skin. Goosebumps spread all over your skin from his touch and lips. “Heeseung” -you breathed out his name. He just reacted with a smirk and then came up to your beautiful face to give you one last kiss before pulling down your pantie.
“Aw baby, you’re so wet already. You’re so cute.” -He whispered and gave a small kiss to your pussy.
You tried to relax as much as possible but it wasn’t easy when Heeseung’s cock was buried deep inside your cunt and all you could think about is how he perfectly he stretched you out. Heeseung groaned at the feeling of how tight you were and squeezed around his length.
As he pounded into your sweet and sensitive pussy desperately, he reached your cervix making your eyes roll back in pleasure. Heeseung pulled you impossibly closer to his body by your waist and trusted you even deeper making you a moaning mess. You felt like you’d reach your orgasm anytime.
“Fuck, look at you right now princess, you’re taking me so well” -He said between his deep thrust.
“Heeseung, I-I’m gonna cum.” -You cried out, getting more closer and closer to it.
He grinned and slammed his hips into you harder and faster making clapping sounds of your skins smacking against each other.
“Cum for me sweetheart” -He said out of breath as he came at the same time as you right that moment. You clenched around his cock and he let his head fall back from satisfaction. His hot cum dripped down on your thighs which made you the happiest in that moment although you still trembled from the sensation. You were panting and mewing while Heeseung cleaned you up to pull you closer to him as fast as possible.
After that, he put the blanket on you, and gently pulled your fragile body into his arms. You kissed each other for a few more minutes until you started to feel sleepy and closed your eyes.
"Goodnight baby" -Heeseung whispered to your ear while looking at you finally drifting off to sleep.
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