#Her backstory might be written down soon

[ixesese]

Imagine making a version of Axis that looks like a killer robot from a robot series..

EHEM

Lily Will be done soon, just when I finish her concept art

Fun fact: she smells like lavander! Thats because it's Science Starlo's favourite type of flower!

[ohmystaxk]

For there is beauty | Chapter One: What is science, if not risks?

[MASTERLIST] | [NEXT]

Tags/Warnings: Time Travel, Jayce is a Sweetheart, Jayce and Reader are childhood friends, Idiots in Love, Reader has a backstory, Undercity!Reader, Cait is Jayce and Reader's little sister, Protective Jayce, Jayce's Love Language is Physical Touch, Mutual Pining, Viktor-centric, Sassy Viktor, Viktor Needs a Hug, Viktor has a crush on Reader, Accidental Fake Dating, Miscommunication, Slow Burn Jayce/Reader/Viktor, Eventual Jayce/Viktor, Reader is greedy, Smut, Slow Romance, Romance, Canon Related, Possible AU timelines, Fluff, Angst, Reader has parents, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Not Beta Read

Summary: Life was simple. You woke up each morning, and walked the streets of Piltover with Jayce by your side, joking and laughing while Cait could only roll her eyes at the two of you. You worked hard on your research and studied double as much at the Academy to prove your worth. Each day was the same, but that was until you crossed paths with Professor Heimerdinger's assistant at the library one day. His name escaped you, but that never stopped your curiosity for the man. Viktor, he said his name was. And you left the library with that, not expecting to cross paths with him again.

It was then the nightmares began, dreadful glimpses of a world you wish to never exist. A world empty of life, happiness, and freedom. But they were only that, nightmares, nothing more. So why did they feel so vivid? So real, and tangible?

N/A: hello everyone! just like everyone else, I folded and started writing for arcane. I have only watched the show, so my knowledge is ONLY from it! english is not my first language, so I apologize for any mistakes you might encounter along the way.

I currently have 3 chapters written for the fic and I cannot wait to show them to all of you!

I have created playlists that I encourage you to listen to while reading (spotify, yt music and apple music) this fic!

spotify yt music apple music

I will also be uploading this to my ao3: @ohmystaxk

Track List: 1.Breakfast with Lou 2.Bewitched 3.Cinnamon Girl

The warmth was the first thing you noticed, something almost comforting. You let out a breath you were not aware you were holding in the first place. The blood in your body rose to your head as something touched your forehead; that same warmth now replaced your blood, running down every vein, clinging to each cell. It was becoming one with you.

“We were always one .” A voice, distorted and unfamiliar, spoke.

Your heart is empty of blood, only pumping warmth. Your chest is heavy, your lungs chasing for that last bit of air.

“Do not be afraid.” The touch on your forehead shifted to your cheek. “I am right here with you.”

You wanted to open your eyes, look around, and find where that voice originated. You tried to turn your head around, but the touch on your cheek moved to your chin, holding your face in place. Even when the touch was demanding, you did not feel threatened.

“Soon, you will see. ” The voice was different, almost that of a woman. “Truly see what has been hiding underneath. It is time for you to go back. ”

Your body suddenly regained its bearings, jolting you awake as you gasped. The morning light blinded you, forcing your eyes to close once again. Your heart beating worryingly fast, your head felt heavy, and your body tingled. The sound of faraway voices made your head snap towards it, your brows furrowed as footsteps crept closer your way. Then a knock came from the door of your bedroom.

“Are you awake? Did you stay up too late again?”

When you recognized the voice, you pushed the comforter away and stood up from your bed. Your head spun, and your vision went blurry. Suddenly, your knees hit the floor.

Your door flew open.

“Hey, what's wrong?” A pair of hands touched you, one on your back and the other on your forearm. “What happened?”

You grabbed your head with one hand, frowning from the buzzing feeling.

“I don’t think I’m feeling too good right now, Jayce.” Looking up to meet his eyes, you only saw worry in them.

“Yeah, no kidding.” He scoffed awkwardly.

He moved his hand on your arm towards your elbow while the other took your waist.

With some effort, he helped you stand up, walking you back to your bed.

“How did you get in?” You asked once you sat back down at the edge of the mattress.

“I remembered where you keep the spare key.” Jayce stood in front of you, his eyes looking around your room.

“Is everything alright?” You heard a voice coming from somewhere in your apartment.

“Did you bring Cait here with you?” You asked the man with a whisper, eyebrows raised in surprise.

“Yeah, she wanted to come over to the workshop again.” Jayce crouched, amber eyes taking in your features. “Cait!” He called out to the girl.

“Yes?” She answered quickly, a bit of a tremble in her voice.

“Could you bring me a glass of water, please?”

“Oh...Yes!” You then hear the girl walk to what you knew to be your kitchen.

“Hey.” You looked back at Jayce, not realizing you had started to space out. “What are you feeling? Do you need us to take you to a clinic?”

“No-. Just…I’m just a bit dizzy, that’s all.”

Caitlyn entered the room, glass of water in hand as she eyed you. It was a similar look to the one Jayce was giving you.

“Thanks, Cait.” Jayce looked over his shoulder, and the girl walked over and handed him the glass.

“Are you alright?” She hugged herself, head tilted to the side.

“I will be, just a minute.” You sighed, bringing your hand to your temple.

“Here.” Jayce gently handed you the glass, keeping his hand on yours. “I still think we should take you to a clinic.”

“You look pale.” Cait pointed out, leaning against the small dresser in your room.

“I’ll be fine, I promise.” You rolled your eyes, scoffing as you finally took the glass and drank from it.

“Did you feel like this last night?” Jayce held the glass for you once you finished the water.

“No. I felt fine. I think…” Your mind wonders about your strange dream, and how it made you feel.

“What is it?” Jayce leaned closer, tilting his head to catch your gaze.

“I had a strange dream. It startled me. I felt just like I did now; I was dreading something.”

“What was it?” Cait asked, curiosity getting the best of her.

“I don’t know, my eyes were closed the entire time. I just heard a voice.”

Jayce frowned. He placed a gentle hand on your knee before he stood up.

“I think I will take Cait back to her house. I’ll come back with something for you to eat-.”

“No, I’m already feeling better, Jayce.” You stood up, your legs giving you the support you needed.

“You don’t have to exert yourself.”

“I’m not.” You looked at the man with a smile. “Besides, Cait and I know you will barely get things done if I’m not there to help.”

You gave his arm a quick squeeze. Then you walked towards your closet, opened it, and heard Jayce take a few steps.

“We can work on it once you feel better.”

“I feel better, Jayce.” You looked over your shoulder. The man sighed, running a hand through his hair. “I’m going to change and then we can head out.”

“Just-...Yell if you need anything.” He stepped back, then turned around, heading to the door. “Come on, Cait.”

The two of them walked out of the room, closing the door behind them.

You let out a heavy sigh, your hands going to your face. It was true that you were not feeling great, but you were feeling better than before. You stayed up late the night before, reviewing notes from Jayce's project, while also studying for your research paper. You had also forgotten to eat anything, perhaps that had affected you now.

Walking through the streets of Piltover alongside Jayce and Cait had become a bit of a routine for the three of you. Since Counsellor Kiramman had acquired the lab for Jayce, Caitlyn had started tagging along. Especially after she heard about your and Jayce’s projects. Cait was curious, always wanting to help the two of you with whatever was necessary. 

She seemed to enjoy watching you correct Jayce’s work, or talk to her about engineering and the theories for your research paper. It was funny really; two people in their twenties hanging out with a teenager, who they saw like a little sister. The truth was, Caitlyn, reminded you a lot of Jayce all those years ago. 

You opened the front door of your home, sunset had started to set by the time you arrived. You took off your bag and let it fall by the entrance, voices came from the kitchen, and you looked up to find your mother seated on the dining table, a woman across from her as the two laughed. Your mother’s gaze fell on you, a bright smile on her face as she widened her eyes.

“There you are! How was school, baby?” She stood up and gently placed the mug she had in hand on the table. “Come here, I want you to meet someone.”

You slowly approached the table, the other woman turned on her chair, and she smiled once she saw you. Her hair was a dark brown, almost black. Her eyes were light brown and she had a pretty mole next to her right eye.

“Oh, isn’t she adorable?” The woman said. Your mother met you halfway, placing a hand on your shoulder and the other between your shoulder blades, nudging you towards her.

“Say hi, baby.” Your mother brushed a strand of hair behind your ear.

“Hello,” Your voice was small, just above a whisper. You played with your hands.

“Hello, your mother was just telling me about you. I’m Ximena, a friend.” She extended her hand to you, and with a trembling hand, you took it. “Oh, you are a bit shy. Please don’t be.”

“Ximena is a friend of your dad and me. She has a son your age, and we wanted the two of you to get to know each other.” Your mother explained with a smile. “Now, take a sit while I serve you dinner, you must be hungry by now.”

Your mother gently directed you towards the table, you took a seat and watched Ximena as she adjusted herself on her chair.

“Oh yes, my boy should be here any minute now. I believe the two of you go to the same school, but he is a year older than you, sweetheart.” At that you frowned, wondering who her son was out of all the boys in your school.

“Okay.” That was the only thing you could reply with. Under the table you kept playing with your hands, your nails picking at the skin.

“You didn’t tell me how school was? Did the professor grade the painting yet?” Your mother asked, your nails dug deeper into the flesh.

“I-it was okay. She liked it.”

“I’m glad she did! I told Ximena how hard you have been working on the art project.” You bit your lip, your vision blurring as you picked even more at the skin.

A knock came from the front door. Ximena stood up from her chair, fixing her skirt as she walked to the door.

“Must be my boy.” She said, you did not look up, your eyes focused on the markings on the table.

The door opened, and you tuned out the voices, your lips quivering as your vision became blurry. Your heart was heavy on your chest, and the next thing you knew, you heard your mother call your name.

In front of you was a boy, and his honey eyes were so bright and shiny. He smiled at you, a tooth gap on his front teeth. But his smile failed him, his brows furrowing as he looked at you.

“Sweetheart,” It was Ximena who spoke. “Are you alright?” You could hear the worry in her voice as you quickly stood up and ran to your room.

You shut the door behind you, falling face-first on the mattress as you started sobbing into the pillow. The door opened and you felt the weight shift the mattress someone sat down next to you.“What’s wrong?” Your mother brushed your hair away from your face. “Did something happen?”

You shook your head, sobbing even more. Your mother ran her fingers through your hair, traveling down to soothe your back.

“You know you can tell me anything, baby.”

“T-they they ri-pped the paint-ing.” You struggled in between sobs. Your mother immediately pulled you closer to her, hugging you tightly.

“Who did?” Your mother spoke at the top of your head.

“T-hey said I w-was an Under-city r-rat.” You cried even harder into the crook of your mother’s neck.

After your mother calmed you down and assured you the kids were wrong, she left you in your room to get you food. You lay in your bed, curled up as you traced the patterns on the wall.

“Did you paint those?” You quickly sat up on your bed, your head snapping to the door, standing there was Ximena’s son. His gaze was on one of the paintings on one of the walls of your room.

“M-my mom and me.” You replied, and your voice came out hoarse and small.

“And this one?” He pointed at another one, you now were by the edge of the bed, your legs barely touching the floor.

“Me.” When you said that, he turned to face you. Your face was puffed up, your eyes red from crying.

“I like it.” He said, and the boy walked up to you, he sat down on the bed next to you. “My name is Jayce.” You told him your name, and he smiled at you. “You have a pretty name.”

It was later you two shared your curiosity for science and inventions. You two finally found things in common; Magic, science, art, and literature. It was those moments that had led to your friendship of twelve years .

“Like I said, I was reviewing my notes.” You rolled your eyes. Jayce walked right beside you, your shoulders brushing.

“And are you sure to went straight to bed?” He leaned down a bit, wanting to see your face as you held the strap of your bag tightly. “Did you eat anything?”

“Well-.”

“I knew it!” He snapped his fingers, pointing forward as you tilted your head away with a sigh, closing your eyes. “I told you we could stop by and get some dinner.”

“I wasn’t hungry…” You looked at him.

Jayce’s hair was neatly styled. You could smell his aftershave as he leaned over, his arm reaching your right shoulder, pulling you closer to him.

“Aren’t you the one always reminding me to eat? Especially when I don’t want to.”

“You do always remind him.” Cait shimmed in. When you look to your right to narrow your eyes at her, she simply shrugs.

“Thanks, Cait.” Jayce now wrapped his arm over your shoulders, pulling you even closer. “Which is why we are grabbing a bite before we head to the studio.” You threw your head back.

“I need to stop by the library first.” You glanced up at Jayce, his amber eyes narrowing. “Just remembered that I need to get some books.”

“Right now?” He asked with a pointed look.

“Might as well, the library is right across.” You pointed with your eyes at the massive building across the street.

Jayce slowed down his steps, making you slow down as well.

“Your research paper?” He asked.

“Yeah.” You gave his chest a quick pat and pulled back a bit, his arm sliding over your back before he too pulled away. “I still need to finish the draft before I can start working on the actual paper.”

You adjusted the weight of your bag.

“Think you feel better to head on your own?” Jayce scratched his head, eying you as you laughed.

“Don’t worry, if I need a big strong man to help me, I’m sure I can find one there.” You slapped his arm with the back of your hand. Jayce rolled his eyes, scoffing at the comment. “I won’t stay long, how about you start heading over and grab me something to eat? I’ll see you two in a few.”

“You want the same thing from yesterday?” He asked as you were already starting to walk away.

“Sure, sounds good. Cait, keep an eye on this one, don’t let him wander off with strange women.” You smiled at the girl, and Cait simply laughed with a nod.

“I-. I don’t wander off!” He called out once you started crossing the street.

“Didn’t hear you deny the last part though!” You laughed as you ran, holding your bag tightly.

The Piltover library was massive, with three floors and an impressive collection, even containing two extra lower levels for more restricted books and archives. You immediately went to the second floor, walking past tall bookshelves. The sunlight was casting different colors due to the stained glass from the windows. Then you took a turn, finding the section you were looking for. You stopped when you saw that someone was standing at the other end. He had brown hair and a strong nose, his focus deep in a book. The man leaned on a cane, the light filtering from the stained glass casting a yellow glow on him.

With a thud, he closed the book he was reading. He placed the book back on the shelf, his eyes looking at the spines. You recognized him as Professor Heimerdinger's apprentice; his name escaped you. 

You fixed your bag, and you focused on the book titles closest to you, trying to see if you could find what you were looking for. But with every two books you looked at, your eyes could not help but glance towards him.

You had always seen him around the academy, always on his own. Whenever you saw him, he would be reading a book or writing something down in his notebook. You had asked about him out of curiosity a good number of times to other students, they also seemed to barely know anything about him. Then there were a couple that mentioned how his mysteriousness was rather, attractive. But the only thing that everyone seemed to agree on was that he was… gifted . He had to be if he had caught the attention of the Dean.

Without knowing, you were already standing shoulder to shoulder next to him. You accidentally bumped into him.

“I’m sorry!” You immediately uttered, your eyebrows shooting up and your face burning hot. “I was distracted.”

He already had another book in hand. He looked your way, seemingly also surprised. His eyes scanned you, falling on your eyes before he spoke.

“No need to worry.” He said with an accent you didn’t quite recognize, it sounded nice. “I didn’t see you.” It suits him.

The man took a step to the side to create some distance between the two of you.

“Sorry.” You said more quietly, your eyes glancing back and forth between him and the shelves.

As you tried your best to compose yourself, your eyes caught sight of a book you were looking for. You looked at him, making sure you were not in his way, and reached for it.

“Excuse me, going to grab this.” You called out. 

You needed to finish the research paper, three months had gone by so fast that trying to meet the deadline felt almost impossible.

Once you picked it up, you noticed a few more and quickly grabbed them. You stepped back with your stack of books and turned around, heading back to the main hall. 

That was until you heard his cane and feet shift.

“Those are about Astrophysics.” The man suddenly spoke again. Your eyes widened as you stood in place. “Is it curiosity or for research?”

 You looked over your shoulder, your eyes meeting with his bright amber eyes; they were similar to Jayce’s, but perhaps they were a bit lighter.

“B-both.” You were caught off guard. After many years and countless times of seeing him around the Academy; this was the first time you had interacted with him.

“Um.” He gave a quick nod. His eyes shifted towards your books before meeting your gaze once more.

“It’s research. For my final.” You fixed your posture, your body turning to face his.

“I have…seen you before, in the academy.” He stated, shifting his weight on the cane more comfortably.

“Yes, I’m part of the Engineering department.” You put the weight of the books on your hip. “Or I was. I was part of Professor Heimendinger’s lecture last summer.”

“Oh.” He’s eyebrows rose a fraction. “I remember now. You sat close to the middle row.”

You remembered when you and Jayce had arrived at the lecture for the first time. How excited he was, talking your ear off as the two of you sat down. You remembered how dark the auditorium always was, except for the chalkboard and the podium the Professor stood. It became a habit to always sit in the same spot, not out of preference, but it just did. Sometimes whenever someone decided to take those two spots, you and Jayce would jokingly say things like ‘ The audacity. ’ or ‘ We should start carving our names on the desk at this point. ’

It was then you remember seeing the assistant in the corner of the room many times, almost like he was hiding in the shadows. You would meet his eyes on occasion, even in the dark you were always impressed by how bright his eyes seemed to shine.

“Yes.” You let out a chuckle. Your eyebrows furrowing. How did he remember that? “And you are the Professor’s assistant.”

His eyes fell on your hips, taking note of your posture. “I am, yes.”

“How did you get the offer?” You fixed the hold on the books. “That’s a very big opportunity.”

“My charms I believe.” He shrugged. You smiled as you let out a laugh.

“Oh yes, those are very important.” You took a step forward. “Every inventor needs them.”

“Not everyone has those.” He grinned as he placed back the book he was holding on the shelf.

“Do I?” You played along.

He stopped his hand, his fingertips brushing the spine of the book. He raised an eyebrow, amber eyes staring at yours with curiosity.

“Um.” He eyed you. “What is it that intrigues you the most? Astrophysics or Engineering?”

You scoffed and rolled your eyes. What a charmer , you thought.

“Why not both?” You tilted your head to the side with a grin.

He nodded with a smile. You noticed the moles adorning his cheek and upper lip.

“Well, what is it about Astrophysics that made you want to pursue it?”

“The many unanswered questions space holds from us; about gravity, the sun, and the moon. But I didn’t get into Astrophysics for that only. I am searching for something more, something out there in the universe.”

“Which is?” He took a step forward.

“Magic.” You answered breathlessly. “Time, space, the possibility of actions and consequences. What other possibilities those could have led to.”

“Time travel.” He answered, his eyes widen a fraction.

“Multiple timelines possibly coexisting within the same plane. I believe the Arcane is capable of that.”

He looked at you, his eyes shifting between yours and the books still resting on your hip.

“The Arcane is wild magic…not something science could master.”

“You’re right, but I believe science could help us understand magic.” You started talking with your hand. “I’m not thinking of bending the Arcane to science’s will. But I wish to find an understanding.”

The two of you stood there in silence. The noise of people speaking and walking around soothing your nerves. It had been your dream that had connected you with Jayce, the mutual understanding of what magic could do and the wonders it held.

“Those types of ideas could get you expelled from the Academy.” If he had spoken those words with a serious tone, it would have scared you. Instead, he still held curiosity in his eyes. “But what is science, if not risks?”

You let out a breath you did not know you were holding in. You frowned.

“Are you going to tell the Professor?” You watched him soften his eyes.

“I’m his assistant, not his whisperer.” He grinned and you could not help but let out a nervous laugh.

“I have to go…” You held his gaze. “It was nice to finally talk to you.”

“Likewise.” He smiled at you. You felt your cheeks suddenly heat up. “You have a great mind.”

“Thank you…” You were going to say his name when you realized you could not remember it. 

“Vik tor .” You felt a sudden touch in the back of your head. Your eyes narrowed for a second, you could’ve sworn you heard his voice change. “You can call me Viktor.”

“T-Thank you, Viktor.” You gave him your name, taking a step back as you slowly started retreating. “I will go now.”

You turned around and started heading to the hall. Your heart started beating fast once more. Perhaps, you were still having side effects. Or the Academy was making you begin to lose your mind.

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[iamnmbr3]

I hate it when people say Ginny "deserved better" when it comes to the way she was written and portrayed in canon. I'm sorry but no she didn't deserve better. She was a barely there Mary Sue character who existed primarily to be the future wife of Harry and link to him joining the Weasley family. She was also supposed to be this very powerful witch but again it never paid off. She didn't amount to anything. She turned out to be a big nothing burger of a character.

Idk. I do think she deserves better, though I definitely get where you're coming from. Ginny as a character really annoys me from book 6 on. Book 6 and 7 Ginny feels like a shallow and annoying Mary Sue and also is just kinda mean and I hate that she never gets called on her bad behavior. As soon as I feel like a story is trying to shove a character down my throat and insist that I love them and that they are flawless, I kinda feel turned off by the character and I want to hate them out of spite. Ginny's pettiness and stuff like her being pretty awful to Fleur and getting angry at Harry for even saying something nice about Fleur even though he has no romantic interest in her just really rubs me the wrong way. Especially bc these flaws are ignored and even glorified by the story. Plus there's not much there with her character.

She feels like this kinda wish fulfillment empty vessel. And I hate that she gets touted as this perfect girl for Harry when their romance feels so empty and her character feels so un-compelling - which is honestly pretty unusual because generally the characters in HP are really interesting, even the ones we only hear a little about.

Now that said, I still do actually feel that she deserves better. What do I mean by that? Well, first of all, in-universe she ends up with someone who frankly, doesn't pay much attention to her. Harry barely knows anything about Ginny and never makes her his priority. Even in the epilogue it feels like he barely even consulted her on naming their children. He never really views her as an equal or respects her opinion. And she seems to feel pressured to act a certain way to please him. Like not crying in front of him because it might bother him, but apparently having been extremely upset after their breakup according to Ron etc. I don't think they are really compatible or have a deep or substantive relationship and I think that's sad and she (or anyone in that situation) deserves better.

Also from a more Doylist POV she deserved better because her character had so much potential. I actually loved Ginny in book 5. She has a lot of growth but also still feels connected to who she was in the first 4 books. She doesn't need to be amazing and perfect at everything. She's human and real. She catches a snitch by luck because it was slow and her competitor looked away at the wrong moment - and she has the humility to notice and admit this. And it doesn't matter. Harry's professional-level good at Quidditch. She's good at other things. Also Harry and Ginny actually have a deeper and more trusting relationship in that book than in book 6, but I digress. She doesn't need to suddenly be an amazing seeker and an amazing chaser and be #NotLikeOtherGirls and super into Quidditch (even tho she wasn't in book 4) to be likable but book 6 makes her all these things and it just takes away from the real and human and flawed and empathetic and actually funny Ginny we have in book 5.

Also her whole backstory from book 2 was really promising. She and Harry could've bonded over both having had Voldemort inside their heads. She could've provided critical insights about Tom Riddle since she spent a year essentially being pen pals with him. She could've had an epic arc where in book 7 she took on a more central role in the fight and ultimately got to face her childhood monster and destroy a Horcrux. Also there was just a lot to explore with her dealing with the trauma from book 2. She could've done so much. But nope. She just gets reduced to Love Interest TM. So yeah we had this really great character who was just coming into her own in book 5 and had all this amazing potential and then gets absolutely torpedoed by JKR bc she doesn't know how to write romance. And I do think that's a shame.

Now I ship drarry and I think that's always going to be the most interesting and well set up relationship for Harry to be in. But I think Harry and Ginny getting together the way they did is realistic but I think they would then realize they aren't really a good match - they don't know each other and both are more attracted to the idea of each other than anything else. I think them realizing this and working through it would be something interesting to explore in an 8th year fic.

[cheegu3]

Enhypen - the glory (part 5)

summary; after rejecting one of the most popular boys at your new school, you soon realised that you'd done the gravest mistake of your life; these weren't ordinary boys, and now they were set on making your life a living hell - heavily based on the kdrama with the same name

warnings; yandere, bullying, swearing, alcohol, hospital scene, mentions of murder & suicide, affair

genre; yandere

wc; 4.8k

pairing; enha x f.m reader

note; this is more of a chill chapter, we get someone's backstory :D but yeah u won't be as stressed after as the last chapter lmao, also I've changed the narrating a little based on this poll I did, if everyone hates it I will change it lol, but I felt it added a little more flavour ??? to the characters.

masterlist

The sound of the phone hitting the floor echoed in the empty hallway. You backed away, slowly while never taking your eyes off of it; as if it had a camera inside and whoever texted was watching with a grin on their face.

It started ringing, vibrating violently on the floor. You ran up and picked it up, only because you were afraid they were still in the building and could hear it. But when looking down at the screen, you breathed out in relief. It was the number that Soobin had texted with.

‘’ Hello? ‘’

You waited in silence, not wanting to risk revealing anything in case that number wasn’t him either.

‘’ Y/n? ‘’

It was his voice, thankfully.

‘’ Soobin! I think they have my number. I got a text from someone else and I thought it was you. ‘’ you said in a hushed voice, starting to walk towards the entrance while hunched over.

‘’ What? Did you say anything? ‘’

‘’ Not anything that would make them think I was talking to you. But who do I say I thought it was? They will probably ask tomorrow. ‘’

Soobin quietened for a moment.

‘’ Maybe it’s best you don’t come to the academy tomorrow. ‘’

‘’ No, that’s a terrible idea! It will make me look really suspicious. ‘’

‘’ Will you really be able to lie to their faces if you see them though? ‘’

‘’ I have to try at least. But if I don’t succeed, a backup plan? ‘’

You heard him hum on the other side of the line.

‘’ We can use Yeonjun then. ‘’

Your face scrunched up, doubt written all over your face. You were pretty sure he’d reject it, rather rudely, based on him telling you to stay away from his brother the last time the two of you talked.

‘’ Or…Yena. ‘’ you suggested.

‘’ Yena? Who is that? ‘’

‘’ Jungwon’s sister. I’ve met her and she gave the impression of almost hating him. It’s a long shot bu- ‘’

Soobin sassily agreed, ‘’ It definitely is. ‘’

‘’ Backup plans don’t have to be super solid. I’m just gonna bet everything on plan A working out. ‘’

You didn’t have many choices after all. Yena was risky and uncertain, Yeonjun was almost certainly a no and you weren’t sure about Sunoo yet. With no other friends that could be undercover right under the noses of your bullies, all that was left to do was to believe in yourself and be confident; which was definitely a first.

‘’ What do I do if they text again? ‘’

‘’ Pretend like you knew it was them from the beginning. If they question it, say you were…drunk? ‘’ 

Your loud laugh echoed. ‘’ Soobin, your suggestions suck. ‘’

‘’ Sorry…’’ he mumbled back.

‘’ I might have to resort to that though, if it all goes to shit. ‘’

‘’ I still don't think you should go. ‘’

‘’ My parents want me to get good grades. I can’t lose my scholarship at this prestigious school. ‘’

‘’ But you already went today. Just use an excuse so you don’t have to see them. We can hang out instead, if you want? ‘’

Your phone vibrated again in your hand.

‘’ Hold on, I’m getting another call. I’ll let you know though. ‘’

‘’ Okay, bye! ‘’

You pressed answer on the incoming call after having hung up on Soobin. It was an unknown number again, so mentally you prepared yourself before putting the phone to your ear.

‘’ Hello? ‘’

‘’ Did you guess right? ‘’

The voice sounded familiar, but admittedly it was one of the last people you expected.

‘’ Sunghoon? ‘’

‘’ Well done! ‘’

‘’ How do you have my number? ‘’

‘’ Took your phone while Ni-ki was busy with you in the gym. ‘’

Ah, of course. It would’ve been almost impossible to divide your attention between all seven of them to catch them in the act if they went through your stuff. You were thankful for having changed your settings so you actually had a password now, making sure they couldn’t go through your phone and see Soobin there.

‘’ Do the others have it too? ‘’

‘’ Not yet. ‘’

You weren’t sure what to say next, letting the silence settle. You felt like there was something else, but he was taking his time saying it.

‘’ Oh, right! I forgot about that. ‘’ he shouted out abruptly as if talking to himself.

‘’ Forgot about what? ‘’

‘’ You texted me back, almost like you were waiting for someone to text you. ‘’

You panicked and was forced to come up with a lie on the spot in just a few seconds. Luckily, since he couldn’t see you, it was much easier to lie. Your face didn’t heat up and you didn’t have to maintain eye-contact with basically one of the living lie detectors out of the group. 

You were incredibly lucky today. If you were face to face, he’d be able to figure out you were lying very fast.

 ‘’ Yeah…my cousin just got a phone and said she’d text me today. ‘’

He went quiet for a moment, scaring you. Was he trying to assess your voice because he wasn’t sure if he believed you? 

‘’ Are you lying to me, sweetheart? ‘’

You froze but managed to press out an answer through clenched teeth, ‘’ No. ‘’

‘’ Are you sure? I can easily check up on your family, you know that. ‘’

But you had already made up your mind, it would be cruel and very stupid to throw Soobin under the bus now. The only option was doubling-down and lying until your nose turned red.

‘’ Yes. I’m sure. ‘’ you tried to put a little irritation to your tone to make it more believable.

After some time, he ticked his tongue and reluctantly answered,

‘’ Okay. ‘’

You waited with bated breath, for what he’d say next.

‘’ You’re coming tonight, right? ‘’

‘’ Tonight? What’s tonight? ‘’

‘’ Just hanging out. Jungwon’s house. Come over. ‘’

‘’ But- ‘’

Your protest was rudely cut off by the sound of the call ending. Looking down at the phone, a scowl formed on your face and you huffed. Another party? What was wrong with them?

You stood in the corridor, feeling completely dumbfounded. Could you even run away now, no- you glanced down at your arms, remembering what happened last time you did and cursing them for giving you such a permanent reminder.

Taking a deep breath you cautiously made your way to the entrance. Despite him not mentioning anything about the hospital, it was still pretty smart to be on your guard on the way out. Who knew if that girl had texted them as soon as you and Soobin left her room, and they rushed there to ambush you.

But it was fairly quiet when you reached the front desk. If they were hiding, they probably would’ve come out a long time ago, since you were just meters away from the entrance now.

You shrugged off the random burst of paranoia and sprinted to hail a taxi outside. Maybe they would let you go home quite early just like last time. There wasn't much you could bring to the table anyway.

You fished your phone out and texted Soobin, telling him that Sunghoon had called and told you to come to Jungwon's house. It felt a bit unusual. You’d never hung out with them after school up until the day before, when Jay dragged you to the party.

‘’ Miss, we’re here. ‘’

‘’ Thank you. ‘’

You got out and hurried inside as it was still snowing, albeit a lot less than earlier. They were standing in the entrance, all eyes on you when the taxi drove away. The gate stood wide open this time, and the front door was open which gave them a perfect view of the driveway.

‘’ Hey. ‘’ Sunoo smiled at you.

You groaned mentally, whole body screaming for you to turn back around and go home. They didn’t even give you a chance though. As soon as you had put your stuff down, you were dragged by the waist to the living room, where all those people had been last time.

However, this time the couches were empty except for when they started sitting down in them one by one. You shifted uncomfortably, being the only one still standing.

It was obvious that there was no party. No music and no other people, only the alcohol in the red cups was the recurring theme from the day before. Why did they make you come there all alone? You felt anxiety start to brew at the pit of your stomach. 

‘’ I-uh…can I use the bathroom? ‘’

It was the oldest trick in the book, but hopefully they had already had so much to drink before you showed up that they wouldn’t think twice about it.

Jake was the only one who answered, with an uninterested grunt. You went right away, in case they would change their minds. Locking yourself into the bathroom you texted soobin. 

6:00 pm

You: Soobin? They’ve dragged me to Jungwon’s house.

The phone pinged almost immediately, you panicked and turned off the sound, looking around in the silence to see if they might’ve noticed. Nothing moved around outside and no noises or footsteps got closer. 

Next you had to suppress a laugh as you noticed you named him cousin so the others wouldn’t notice anything. Naming him ‘’ baby ‘’ would’ve made all hell break loose if they had just spotted it once.

Cousin: What? Like a party? 

You: Not really, I’m the only one here.

Cousin: Can you get away? 

You sucked on your lip while thinking. There wasn’t really a way out of this unless you wanted to have more wounds on your body. The whole thing felt like a very annoying headache.

Cousin: Y/n? Hello? Do you need help? 

You: No! We have a plan, remember?

Cousin: Sorry :(

You: I’ll text you later

Cousin: I live close by, just run over

You: Will you drive me home? :) 

Cousin: ofc!

‘’ Princess? ‘’

You jumped and almost dropped your phone clumsily in the process of getting up from the toilet seat. The phone slipped into your pocket again. You unlocked the door and stepped out, coming face to face with Heeseung.

He only looked at you briefly, then pushed past you to get to the bathroom. You went back to join the others. Sunoo and Ni-ki occupied the only couch that wasn’t full so you went to them.

Sunoo lit up when seeing you and Ni-ki only said something under his breath before moving so you could sit next to him. Sunoo handed you a cup and you poured alcohol in it, downing it almost immediately in a poor attempt to fix your uneasiness.

‘’ Not drinking? ‘’

‘’ Not a fan. ‘’

Ni-ki sounded moody, resting his elbows on his legs so his whole form was slumped over. His head didn’t raise when he talked, indicating he wanted to be left alone. You looked at Sunoo for answers but he just shrugged, mouthing ‘ bad day ‘.

‘’ Do you still box? ‘’

He finally raised his head to give you a very vehement look. ‘’ Yeah. ‘’ 

Sunoo tried to avoid it when his eyes averted to him, knowing he was looking at him in disbelief over what he had blurted out when he was alone with you. Whistling innocently he looked away and pretended like he was interested in the intense and lively conversation Jake and Jay were having next to him.

Now that Sunoo was turned away from you two, you leaned in a bit closer to Ni-ki, asking what you’d been wondering for a long time.

‘’ Do you even like me? ‘’

He frowned and then looked a bit caught off guard, pulling his hood further up to cover more of his face. ‘’ Yeah? I…think so. ‘’

‘’ But like, as much as the others or…’’ you trailed off.

He glared at you through his bangs which made you close your mouth again, regretting saying anything at all.

‘’ Y/n? ‘’

Sunghoon called you over, patting on the empty seat next to him where presumably Heeseung sat in before. Reluctantly you sat down, glancing at Jake and hoping you wouldn’t catch his attention any time soon, since he was extra bad when intoxicated.

Sunghoon must’ve noticed, his long fingers came up to your jaw, turning your head towards him. You stared into his bleary eyes. He looked very drunk, long gone with his pupils struggling to focus on you. But there was still some tenderness in them.

Sunghoon was slightly anxious. He’d never been alone with you before, and not this close in such an innocent way too; they all acted as a group and stuck together as one, agreeing to not be alone with you for too long.

While leaning his head back on the couch the two of you were sitting on, he turned his head to look at you. It was embarrassing how nervous you made him, as if you were some crush he had in middle school. Just looking at you made his throat close up.

‘’ Do you like this house? ‘’ he randomly blurted out, through slurred speech.

You laughed lightly which made Sunghoon smile widely.

‘’ Yeah, it’s nice. ‘’

He wanted to say more, maybe the way to your heart was to make you laugh. But he didn't get the chance to before Jungwon plopped down on the other side of the couch, next to you.

He didn’t seem at all interested in flirting with you, instead going straight into a rather serious-toned conversation, a dead-pan look on his face.

‘’ Do you know why he invited you here? ‘’

‘’ No. Not really. ‘’ you tilted your head.

‘’ From now on, we want to see you outside of school too. ‘’

You turned to him. ‘’ Why? ‘’

His lips were licked as annoyance flashed across his face, his cold eyes piercing through you. ‘’ Because we said so. ‘’

The alcohol had started to rush to your head already, making your speech a bit slower, vision blurrier but also lips bolder. 

‘’ Why are you always so blunt with me? You’re kind of mean. ‘’ 

He grimaced at your whiny tone and got eye-contact with Sunghoon, who probably knew what his friend was thinking. But he could never really stop Jungwon, since he was the leader after all.

‘’ Because, you’re a brat. ‘’ he calmly said, although his eyes were anything but.

‘’ A brat? ‘’ 

You stood up and almost stumbled into his lap when the dizziness hit you. Tauntingly, you looked down at him while swinging your cup in one hand.

‘’ You’re the ones who fucking bully me, you piece of shit! ‘’

‘’ Y/n. ‘’ Sunghoon warned, seeing Jungwon’s eyes narow.

‘’ Don’t talk to me like that. ‘’

You groaned and almost ripped your hair out in frustration. His calm exterior always made you feel crazy; it made you look hysteric in comparison, and wrong when you had all the reasons to be acting like that.

‘’ Shut the fuck up! ‘’ you yelled.

He snapped. Standing up so fast you flinched and lost balance, he was there to jerk you towards him with a harsh grip around your wrist. You lost your chance to talk as he hurried to drag you upstairs, Sunghoon running behind. 

You get pushed into a bedroom and Sunghoon got the door slammed in his face just as he was a few seconds away from it.

The tension in the room is high. Even though your back was turned to Jungwon, you could almost feel how he seethed of anger, but it was controlled and calculated, he was in control not you.

‘’ Face me. ‘’

You shuddered at his low voice, taking as much time as possible to turn around. The door was locked, who knew what he was going to do to you, away from the eyes of others?

‘’ I’m sorry. ‘’

You finally turned, and immediately your eyes unwillingly welled up with tears. It was the last thing you wanted to happen, but you became that girl in the gym again. Just one look at him and you wanted to cower away, beg for mercy or cry like a helpless child. 

You felt like a different person outside of the school. Because when the day was over, so was the torture. Seeing him look like he wanted to tear you apart in a different environment than the bleak walls of the gym reminded you of your grim future; they would torture you in your safe haven now too. It wouldn’t be over as soon as you passed the gates. They demanded you meet them at their houses and text them. What would happen if you answered just one second too late?

Jungwon stared at you wordlessly. He felt his chest swell with pride due to the sadistic nature of the situation. He liked that you were so afraid of him and that he, more than the others could elicit such a strong reaction from you - only a puppeteer could know his toy that well, know exactly what strings to pull for what; and what is that if not love?

You saw his face unmoved by your sniffling, so as a last resort you pathetically went down on your knees, hands clasping together while incoherent pleas left your mouth.

‘’ Please…please- don’t hurt me. ‘’

He crouched and was careful not to show any emotions. ‘’ Say you’re sorry again. ‘’

You looked up at him and he almost became entranced by the look of your teary eyes, glimmering while looking up at him, only him.

‘’ I’m sorry. ‘’

‘’ Good. ‘’ His lips twitched. ‘’ Stand up. ‘’

They tugged upwards momentarily when you obeyed. You kept your head down, scared to provoke him, even by doing the slightest of things.

‘’ I’m gonna give you my number. When I text, answer. When I call, answer. ‘’ 

He turned his back on you to dig his phone out from a bag thrown on the floor. You got the sudden urge to attack him and then make a run for it, but that wouldn’t lead to anything but short satisfaction.

You recollected yourself in time for him turning back and handing you his phone. When you’re done and he took it back impatiently, he stared at the screen for a while. Then he pressed the number and your phone vibrated.

‘’ Save it. ‘’

You gave a fake smile and nodded. However, seeing as it didn’t seem to satisfy him, you quickly did what he asked on the spot.

‘’ You can go now. ‘’

‘’ Already? I haven’t really talked to the others, and they don’t even have my number except for Sung- ‘’ you pressed your lips shut.

Although it was slowly starting to wear off, the alcohol had made you ramble again and by the look of dissatisfaction on his face, you could tell he wanted you to shut up.

‘’ You don’t need those yet. Am I not doing you a favor? ‘’ he stepped closer, making you automatically back away.

There were only a few meters until you’d back into the wall. You prayed to God that he wouldn’t force you to back into it entirely, so he could creep over you.

‘’ Do you want to be here? ‘’

Your mouth fell open at the horrible accusation. Why would you want to be at the house of one of your bullies, where they all hung around you, taking turns to poke their sticks into your skin to get a reaction?

‘’ No. I’m leaving. ‘’

He didn’t stop you, but you heard the arrogant scoff and saw the smirk when passing by him anyway. Your angry stomping down the stairs caught the attention of the other guys.

‘’ You’re leaving already? ‘’ Jake shouted, hurrying to get up so he could follow you.

Ni-ki and Sunoo watched you curiously, not saying anything.

‘’ You basically just got here. ‘’ 

He tried to pull you into a hug, which you quickly slipped out of, seeing Jungwon standing at the top of the stairs. 

‘’ I said she could go. ‘’

His stern voice made Jake freeze and he moved away from you, giving you a small smile which made you raise your eyebrows awkwardly.

‘’ Bye. ‘’ you mumbled, closing the door behind you.

Well that was…weird? 

*******

‘’ I’m here! ‘’

Soobin ran over to greet you, a big grin plastered on his face.

Footsteps approached the hallway and rounding the corner, the owner of them, Yeonjun popped his head out. His smile dropped when seeing you.

‘’ Y/n. ‘’ he said, rather formally.

‘’ Yeonjun. ‘’

Soobin chuckled. ‘’ No need to be so awkward. You’ve met before. ‘’

You took off your shoes and he strolled off in front of you, making you hurry to follow as you didn’t want to be alone with his grumpy older brother.

‘’ Are you okay? ‘’

‘’ Yeah, it wasn’t too bad. ‘’

He looked relieved and started walking further into the house, waving at Yeonjun to come with and ultimately stopping in the living room.

‘’ Maybe we can watch a movie. ‘’

‘’ I’m fine with anything. ‘’ you smiled.

‘’ Is this the part where I leave? ‘’

‘’ Yeonjun! ‘’ Soobin gasped.

His cute attempt at trying to look stern made you snort.

Meanwhile, his older brother threw his head back and groaned in discontent, plopping down on the couch and crossing his arms in protest.

‘’ For how long? ‘’

‘’ I don’t know yet. Don’t be rude. ‘’

Soobin pressed on the control and the large flat TV screen lit up. You almost ticked your tongue and shook your head. Of course he was a Disney nerd.

He turned around, looking childishly excited, and came over to sit down next to you. The movie quite quickly became forgotten, serving as background noise while you and Soobin passionately fought over the snacks.

‘’ I’ll go make you kids some food. ‘’ Yeonjun said, rolling his eyes at the two of you, and leaving you and Soobin alone in the living room.

Soobin craned his neck to check that his older brother had really left before turning to you. There was something he had wanted to tell you for a long time.

‘’ Does he not like me? ‘’

He smiled knowingly and shook his head. ‘’ It’s not that, I promise. ‘’

‘’ Then…did he have a rough childhood or something? ‘’ you sarcastically joked as you didn’t like when people used that as an excuse to be rude.

‘’ Something like that. ‘’

You caught the way his tone sounded borderline uncomfortable so you cleared your throat awkwardly. ‘’ Sorry, I was just joking.

‘’ His friend got bullied when he was in middle school. I’m sure he just feels a bit- well, vulnerable around you. ‘’ 

You weren’t sure how to respond so you just hummed, it was your turn to feel uncomfortable as Soobin was determined to continue no matter what.

‘’ He really struggled to see him like that. There wasn’t much he could do. When he went to the principal he was shut down, told that it was just ‘ friends playing around ‘. Later he found out their parents were pretty rich though, and at least one of them was a part of the anti-bullying committee. ‘’ Soobin shook his head, sighing while a sour expression overtook his face.

‘’ If he confronted them, they wouldn’t beat him. No, they were different, almost psychos despite being kids. They would bully his friend harder instead, knowing it would push Yeonjun away from him because he wanted to protect his friend. In the end, he was lonely. Everyone he loved watched from a distance, knowing that if they intervened it would get even worse. ‘’

‘’ What happened after they graduated then? Did he never get his justice or revenge? ‘’

Soobin looked away from you, his heart felt heavy.

‘’ No. He never did. ‘’

Silence filled up the living room. Hearing that both made you feel incredibly sorry for Yeonjun and also anxious for your fate. Would it be the same as that boy? Would Soobin have to suffer the same way - by the sidelines watching helplessly just like his brother?

You raised your head, noticing he wasn’t completely finished with his heartbreaking story. He had to hurry because the rummaging in the kitchen had stopped, indicating Yeonjun was on his way back.

‘’ It had a very unhappy ending. Remember when I said I recognized the look in your eyes when you were walking to the rooftop? ‘’

Your heart sunk. ‘’ Yeah…’’ 

Did you even really want to hear the next part? 

‘’ He saw that one night. While walking home from school. So just like I did, he followed his friend to a rooftop. ‘’

‘’ He wasn’t as lucky as you were? ‘’ you filled in when he got quiet again.

He nodded, a somber look on his face.

‘’ But, he didn’t jump though. ‘’

You frowned.

‘’ What? What do you mean? ‘’

‘’ He was pushed. ‘’

This time the silence was deadly, stretching on for several minutes. On the other side of the wall, Yeonjun was leaning against it, a single tear rolling down his cheek.

‘’ Did he get justice?

‘’ No. Of course not. The rich and powerful always get away with it. Yeonjun went to the police station but when they arrived, a bunch of black cars were already there. Took about ten minutes of inspecting before they concluded it was a suicide. ‘’

You felt nauseous. 

‘’ Did he…did he see who pushed him? ‘’

‘’ Yeah, it was them of course. The worst out of them all did it, and while they all freaked out, he barely flinched. As a solution, they were transferred to different schools in Seoul and it was swept under the rug. Even if Yeonjun wanted to get revenge, it would be almost impossible to find them. ‘’

‘’ Fuck, that’s heavy. ‘’ you leaned back on the sofa and stared at the ceiling, taking in everything that had been said.

‘’ I think the worst part is that nobody believed him. ‘’ you turned and saw that he was crying now, his knuckles were rubbed due to the rage he felt on the inside.

Breathlessly you watched him. You hadn’t seen Soobin like this yet.

‘’ What do you mean? ‘’ you softly whispered and tried to reach out for him.

He let you take his hand, and you rubbed his knuckles instead, but in a more calming and loving manner.

‘’ Since those fuckers cleaned it up neatly, his parents fought a lot about it. When he told them, crying out and looking for support, his mom didn’t believe him, but his dad did. So they got divorced. Then, his dad met my mom. ‘’ 

He ruffled his hair and scoffed. ‘’ Turns out his dad didn’t really believe him either after all. One night he got drunk and confessed he had an affair and just wanted a reason for divorce. ‘’

Your other hand wrapped around his shoulder.

‘’ But you believed him. ‘’

Soobin nodded. The endless tears had started to stain his shirt.

‘’ Of course I did. He’s my brother. ‘’ he mumbled, pain coloring his voice.

‘’ Is that…why you were so quick to help me? ‘’

‘’ I thought that if I couldn’t help him then, well…’’

Struggling to find the words, you filled in for him. ‘’ Then you could help others, to prevent it from happening again? ‘’

He grimaced. ‘’ I haven’t been successful so far. People don’t really believe in me. ‘’

You felt his words sting. It hit a little too close to home and you found yourself feeling guilty for doubting him like everyone else had.

‘’ I’m sorry. ‘’

Soobin let out an airy laugh, knowing what you were thinking of.

‘’ Don’t apologize, you let me in the end, didn’t you? ‘’

You smiled shyly. ‘’ Yeah. I guess so. ‘’

He smiled too, warmth spreading all over his face. But it faded quite suddenly as he had to look away. Why was his heart beating so fast?

-

-

I can't tag some of u and idk why tumblr is being a bitch??? does anyone know how I can fix this??)

taglist; @peaceout97, @ayadikreino, @beoms-sugar, @keikeu, @sunghoonnsupremacy, @lilyalone, @roses-and-blue-perennial-salvia, @eunchaesmileyface, @nunugget, @seunns, @nshmrarki, @huening-ly

[limboraptor]

Captain Caviar family HC (CONCEPT)

This is all still a HUGE concept, but this is what I got for his family tree! Caviar has four other half-siblings, all of whom came from the same mother but different fathers. None of their fathers, including Caviar's blood father, stuck around.

Living in the Lower City back then meant that life was harsher. With pirates running amok and crime at its highest, it was hard to make a quick buck. Lumpfish Roe cookie owned and worked at her blacksmith making weapons and other metal objects alike. She soon realized she needed someone to help her and eventually pass the blacksmith down to. So she met a guy and made a quick buck and had her first born child: Sevruga Caviar Cookie.

She'd teach her to manage the smith young, but she soon realized she'd need more help, so about 5 years after Sevruga's birth, she made another quick buck and had Bowfin Caviar. As the years would pass, Roe would eventually have more children to eventually help support her (both money-wise and physically) in this rough city.

Sevruga and Kaluga both worked hard in the smith while Bowfin wanted to become a fisherman. Osetra wanted to become a medic after spending most of her childhood caring for their youngest sibling: Hackleback.

And that little Hackleback would eventually grow up to become the Republic's most fearless captain and savior of the lower city against the pirates!

SO YEAH TADAAAAA THERE IT IS this is kinda what I got rn!! Still a huge concept so changes might be made. I DO have a written upbringing planned to further paint a picture of Caviar's backstory and life growing up!!! also yes Hackleback Caviar IS Captain Caviar (theres no way he was born with the title "captain" LMAO)

[alicepao13]

Hudson and Rex S02E03 - Blind Justice

Somehow longer than the previous one. It's because of the dumbassery.

That one is... something. For starters, it is the first indication that Charlie will fall prey to manipulation by a romantic interest. Which was why I wasn't that surprised when Eva tried to play him and it worked.

The shelter! And Alan Doyle is here! Why did they never get him to sing us something smh

You don't say. I think Hudson and Rex should end with Charlie adopting a second dog, this time along with Sarah. No, Rex won't die. That dog is immortal, it's actually canon because 10 seasons of German show cases + 8 seasons of Italian show cases = way too many years for a dog to be alive. And Rex would actually be the one to have the final say in the choice of the dog.

Puppy love.

That shot that goes from Rex's paws down the floorboards ending up in the dust that he sniffed out is so cool. Felipe Rodriguez is probably my favorite director in this show.

Charlie: "I think we all know what [the powder] is gonna be". Cue to Joe in the next scene: "Truffles". lmao

More foot-in-mouth as Charlie says (in front of the entire Major Crimes, I might add) his opinion about Leah. Not a good look, by the way. For me, after that exchange it would make more sense if those two had some history aside from, "I know her from the academy". Also, you two were in the academy together? Yeah, right. Sidenote: I recently saw the actress who plays Leah in a few FBI episodes. Did not recognize her at all, as she had short blonde hair. Jarring.

I knew Leah was bad from the start, by the way. In a roundabout way, Charlie wasn't wrong to initially distrust her, he just never had a good reason. She got his gut sidetracked with her "feminine wiles" lol

Charlie actually exhibits some very moronic and insecure behavior in this episode. He is written as a lone wolf who doesn't work well with others, while we know that's not the case because later he will work fine with other officers and agents. In any case, he has not tried to directly antagonize any of them without reason but he does in this episode. The way they talk with Leah does suggest that they have more of a history together but it's not explained anywhere. And then he's like "who thinks me and Rex should go talk to Biggs without you" and he and Rex raise hands/paws and they actually go! So childish.

No, you are, doofus.

Oh thank god. Sarah, save him. Save your himbo future boyfriend.

Jesse: "Keyzer Soze". I'm glad I actually watched this movie (The Usual Suspects) a while back because every single crime show will do at least one episode where they reference him.

How dare you lock Rex in a container?

Once again, how do they get Diesel to make these genuinely distressed noises? Like, this is so good.

Charlie thinks that Leah saved his life and I'm grumbling lol. Or I was when I watched it the first time. Now I'm like, "Oh Charlie, you beautiful himbo."

That's because Rex is the one with the actual instinct.

Here's a part of actual backstory that Charlie tells and I've forgotten. A teenage girl had died in his arms after getting shot.

I love that Sarah is trying to do her normal banter/flirt/non-colleague chat with Charlie and then as soon as she sees he has Leah with him, she falters.

Rex: So you go from the barista with the awful coconut smell to a literal criminal? Not on my watch.

"There's no reason to be jealous". Oh, you haven't seen jealousy, dude. You have a perfectly non-jealous but protective and intelligent Rex. Trust me, you're probably the only one in the franchise with that privilege.

Oh, buddy, I get you.

No, I just cringed my life. I'll be fine.

"She's my work mistress, you're my work wife". Women love to hear that, Charlie. But okay. Flirt. From the way Sarah responds, she's into it. I'd still want a word with the male man who wrote those lines, though.

Jesse is acting like the comedic relief in the entire episode.

I like that Charlie is watching as Rex is being affectionate with Biggs. He's like, what the fuck, Rex shouldn't like this guy. Is my dog broken?

You mean, the way it doesn't and you can do whatever you want with him? Unnecessarily mean? Maybe. But at this point, Charlie needed some real help connecting the dots while he's usually faster to do so. She fried his brain. Or rather, she redirected his blood flow somewhere lower than his brain. By that point, I'd wanted him to get laid because he would see things clearer afterwards.

Men. Also, she totally took her jacket off on purpose.

I actually do feel bad for Charlie. I mean, he was divorced, trying to get back on to dating and then, to start liking a fellow law enforcement officer who turns out to be a crooked... Shitty luck.

Don't you do the tongue thing, sir. She already left you.

You know it's a bad sign when your date climbs out of your bathroom window.

Rain scenes are probably a nightmare to shoot but this scene did need that kind of rainy, foggy atmosphere.

I've been wanting a Charah scene where Sarah is waking up from whatever injury and Charlie is there for ages. Curse upon whomever thought that Sarah had to get severely injured hundreds of miles (I don't know Canadian geography) away from Charlie in S5.

Getting chewed out by the bossman. Deserved.

Oof, suspended. (I'm pretending I didn't know that.) And he goes by the shelter again.

More bad news. Rex's girlfriend Bella is going to the pound. Can no one be happy?

Yeah, actually. You think you've solved the case and there are ten minutes left in the episode.

Okay, now your flirting is coming between your work. Sarah should not be hesitating to talk to Charlie about Leah pulling off the GSR test just because he might think that she's jealous of Leah.

We're back to being a comedy.

Nice trick making us think that because of Leah's text pretending to be Joe, Charlie never actually managed to contact Joe before meeting Leah and therefore was without backup.

If my dog had managed to sniff out a traitor like that, I'd never ever doubt him again.

Dude, how many extras did they get?

And closing with Biggs adopting Bella. Cute.

I actually maxed the image limit on this post and had to delete some screenshots lol. I had a lot to say, okay?

I also feel the need to explain that just because I think someone acts like a dumbass it doesn't mean I hate them. It feels like a thing that we have to explain nowadays. I don't know.

[naminethewriter]

What story do you have backstory that no-one seems to ask about? I want to hear it all!

Oh Edu, that's a can of worms you're attempting to open 😂 I basically never get asked about backstories to my stuff, so I'll see what I've published so far and what I remember of those. I might have talked about some of these things before but for most of them it's been so long, I don't really remember 😅

Let's start with my first Sanders Sides Gift X-Change story His Brother's Wedding. It's a Romile story, my first and only for that ship, and I had a lot more ideas for the AU then I got around to, both because of procrastination and other story ideas. Coincidentally, as I saw in my notes, I did plan to add Lilith to this one as well! Emile is in town to help his grandmother with her flower shop and he's taking a break from his psychology degree to do so. Roman on the other hand is working in Remus' tattoo parlor, though he actually wanted to be an actor and was in Los Angeles for a year or two trying to get into the industry but he failed. He hasn't given up on his dream yet though! As for the other sides that weren't mentioned in the fic, Patton is Emile's cousin who lives in town and is otherwise the one who checks in on Granny Maggie the most. Virgil is his best friend. Janus is Remus' best friend from their school days and he'll be Logan's best man since Roman will be Remus'. Lilith is a distant relative of Remus' landlords, an elderly couple that adore him and see him as their son to a degree. Lilith is spending her summer vacation in town and bonds with Remus, even becoming the flower girl at his wedding.

I might still return to this AU someday, but it's not very high on my priority list...

Second, let's return to Between Two Lives, which I wrote for Intrulogical Week 2 years ago. I don't actually have a lot of extra info about my future plans for that AU written down, but from what I remember some background stuff that might come up is that Janus always has been a demon and he is the reason why Remus became one too. Roman arrived in the afterlife after Remus and while Remus couldn't be there to greet him as soon as he died, he visited him as soon as he could. Roman did think about reincarnating for a bit but decided against it in the end, becoming an angel instead. Patton is one of the first soul to ever become an angel, as in human souls transformed to be an angel. Virgil is a spirit of death that guides souls to the afterlife.

The one one shot I wrote for a ship week that I'm really proud of and that didn't get much attention is Cursed Woods. I really like the vibe I created with it and while I don't have the backstory for it entirely figured out, I can say that Janus is not trapped in there maliciously. In fact he made that choice himself, even if he doesn't remember it. Roman on the other hand was betrayed by someone he trusted and banished. It will be a struggle for him to rebuild his position once he gets back.

Lastly (for now), let's talk about the story I gifted to you: You're Not Alone. As is very clear in the story, Logan was raised by a single mother, but Janus and Remus both have loving parents who all made it their mission to give Logan all the parental love he missed out on. Remus and Roman's parents are immigrants from Germany and they were with the twins on their Christmas trip though they stayed longer and will only come back in the new year. Janus' parents live a state or two away but they will come around before the year ends. They're a bit hippy like and like traveling a lot. Patton, Roman and Virgil are in a QPR, though only Roman is aromantic so Patton and Virgil are dating.

That's all I have right now and a lot of this is more me making up stuff on the spot than actual notes I made but all of these stories have a place in my heart and I could spin more out of them if I wanted to. But there are other projects I feel more connected to. For now at least 😉

Thank you for the ask, even if it took me a bit to get to it 🤭

[flos-ficblog]

flo's masterlist of fics

• Descendants

[W.I.P]

- Descendants: Rise of Red, Rewritten

rewriting the whole movie, glassheart endgame.

[FINISHED]

- "i love you with my body, soul and heart to death."

It's really sad, tw: suicide attempt and selfharm, also includes my three oc's- Astrid, Ashar and AQ. It's CharmingHatterHearts (Chloe x Red x AQ)

- these are the words i held back (I was enchanted to meet you)

glassheart, really cute, basically pure fluff and it's a getting together fic

● Carmen Sandiego

[W.I.P]

- The Story of My Life (i take him home)

florian lafayette-meadows' backstory

- fool me once, fool me twice...

carulia/chasejules au

- Take Me Back To The Night We Met

carulia post-canon meetup, includes my "the devil wears prada" oc and slightly mlb crossover au?

- i wanna walk with you (in the low light)

florence meadowes' backstory

[FINISHED]

N/A

● Encanto

[W.I.P]

- maybe the friends are the enemies we made along the way

Isabela Madrigal x f!oc enemies to lovers, señorita perfecta vs the town sweetheart (the oc was mentioned in the Trauma Chronicles series)

[FINISHED]

- Take Me To The Lakes Where All The Musicians Went To Die (Trauma Chronicles)

post casita falling down, slightly runaway mirabel au? twin sisters mirabel and marabela (oc)

- And Those Encanto Peaks Look Like A Perfect Place To Cry (Trauma Chronicles)

the next day after mirabel disappears but no-one can find her. marabela and carlos confront abuela

- What Should Be Over Burrowed Under My Skin (Trauma Chronicles)

the family makes up, pure fluff continues.

● The Devil Wears Prada

[W.I.P]

N/A

[FINISHED]

- and everyday you surprise me more (why does it always have to be straight women I adore?)

what if Andy 'accidentally' impressed Miranda? canon divergence au, mirandy

● Miraculous: Tales of Ladybug and Catnoir

[W.I.P]

- The Masquerade Ball

chloenette, inspired by another fic. not gonna post this one cos of copyright 🫤

- Well, this is Miraculous

also chloenette, chloe's redemption basically

- Zoe Sings a Song

part 4 of Karaoke Confessions, might finish this... might not. we'll see. The entire series is shit since a beginners thing and rushed asf and I don't have time for rewrites

[FINISHED]

- The Story of Us (Adrien's a Swiftie?!) (Karaoke Confessions)

chloenette, chloe redemption, basically me forcing my love for taylor swift on these oblivious fools (plot holes on plot holes tho)

- The Way I Loved You (Marinette doesn't have a crush on Adrien?!) (Karaoke Confessions)

part 2 of Karole Confessions, clears someeee stuff up

- Uh oh... I'm falling in love. (Karaoke Confessions)

rushed a bit, the whole entire of KC is shit but read if you want- pretty sure chloenette kiss in this one

● Supergirl

[W.I.P]

- Lena Luthor: Boarding School Stories

basically an au if Netflix did a series on Lena's boarding school life, live action, kindddd of x fem oc? idk it was supposed to be this big ass fic but I forgot abt it

- might share a face and a last name (but we are not the same)

Luthor family angst, kara/supergirl being a good girlfriend

- I can't be your midnight love

Lena and Kara had a fight, supergirl came over and helped Lena. this one's basically finished but I forgot abt it so imma post it soon

[FINISHED]

- i didn't mean to say 'i love you' (i love you, but i don't want to)

supercorp angst, pretty shit like the rest of the fanfics cos it's one of the first ones I've ever written

[idsfantasy]

Okay so, head up, I think your videos are cool and I respect the effort and work you put into theories. I also understand not every theory is going to be actually reflective of views, instead following different roads of logic to see what seems the most likely.

But the big reason why I think robot people being in the games is such a reviled concept by so many people, is that it feels like a lame twist that doesn't really accomplish anything and doesn't really go anywhere. And part of that is the source material it comes from. (Warning: long and emotive analysis incoming)

In the actual Fourth Closet book Charlie being a robot isn't handled well. She's written as a mostly normal human person with internal emotions, struggles, and thoughts only to be completely discarded because she's "not real". As soon as it's revealed, she immediately kills herself and Elizabeth with no narrative buildup, and the only possible resolution is a cliffhanger ending that is never fully explained and left up to speculation. We don't really feel the weight of this on anyone, except possibly John, who never discusses it with anyone and never actually ponders what that might mean beyond feeling bummed the girl he wanted to date is dead and also not human. It also gives Circus Baby a very needlessly convulted backstory for the sole purpose of having her run around in a humanoid form and double down on the henchwoman characterization introduced in FFPS.

It doesn't even really explain much beyond a few strange lines and wonky plot threads, it's a thing that happens and despite Charlie being a protagonist she doesn't really get to react to this.

Sammy is completely dismissed as a concept despite it being such a big deal in TSE and TTO and the whole point of Charlie's arc of acceptance and grief. And we get one line saying he's actually alive... and living with the mother Charlie herself mentions talking to in the past. It's a mess.

The only character who is made more intresting and given more weight by this reveal is Henry. Because it changes perception from "flawed man struggling with mental health but ultimately a very loving to father" to "all the above but also with those flaws much more prevalent and damaging". It's fascinating because what he does is incredibly messed up on so many levels, yet entirely understandable. Henry in the novels is a straight up antagonist, not a villian, and not actively malicious, but someone very poorly coping and causing harm by proxy. And that's reflective of a lot of people who are understandably struggling and need support, but at the same time refuse help and find themselves sinking deeper while their loved ones feel helpless. It's deeply tragic, and leaves Henry being a much more nuanced character, mainly because of the fact Charlie doesn't know quite how to feel about him. When she's still allowed to have thoughts, at least.

The whole point of the Charliebots is that grief and loss can make vulnerable people susceptible to delusion, and how that effects the children around them. Both the Charlie-bot and Circus Baby are shaped around trying to conform to a grieving parent who wants them to fill a role that at a certain point, they simply can't. The moment Charliebot stopped living past the age of three, she simply wasn't reflective of that real little girl anymore. She was someone new, based on the hopes and dreams her family had for her. The Charliebots are so so intricately linked to this theme, that I really feel removing the idea of androids from it is kinda insulting to the whole premise.

William blatantly says he couldn't build robots like that, Circus Baby is build upon a failed experiment her modified for his own use, even the Twisteds were implied to be a joint effort. He also simply didn't see his kids in the same way, I truly don't believe he would drive himself to that same point of delusion for kids he just doesn't love.

I've seen some fanauthors right really compelling narratives around these ideas, but they simply aren't in the actual texts. To approach something purely logistically is to deny to narrative and emotional potential of it.

Yes, it's 100% possible. I don't doubt Scott might try to do it. But that doesn't make it impactful. So if he doesn't want to engage with the premise outright, and doesn't say it outloud, then why should I care either? If he's not going to committ to the idea and explore it, then neither am I.

Glad you generally like my videos! And I understand that perspective, but I disagree. Honestly, I think robot people works great thematically for the modern era.

Ithink part of the interest with Charlie being a robot is that she's a robot, but she IS alive. She's not the original Charlie, but because of Henry's emotions she has her own soul.

With William, his goal iirc wasn't to create a human *looking* robot. His goal was to find a way to create that same spark of life that Henry did, but he wasn't able to. Elizabeth was the closest but she's still an actual human soul inside a robot.

When I suggest that robot people are present in the modern games, I don't think they were made out of love, and I don't think they have that artificial soul that Charlie in the books had, hence the connections to CC and Elizabeth. Heck, we know for a fact that there are robot people present in Tales, so why would that be impossible in the games? The issue wasn't making a human looking robot, it was giving said robots life.

Just because we can't see the end goal at the moment doesn't mean there isn't one. Additionally, assuming Scott isn't going to engage with the premise or saying it out loud is probably something to steer clear of. After all, the main evidence I use for Gregbot isn't the weird vision or him looking like the Crying Child, but the wall code in the Sister Location room that describes Gregory in SB to a T while also saying "I built the breath they hunt drawn to life not real still keen" etc. That seems pretty "out loud" to me given the obscurity of most things in these games tbh.

So I do think Scott has committed to the idea. That's why there are 3 robot people in Tales. That's why there are 2 Vanessas. That's why there's the wall code in SB. To me, it seems as though the themes of Help Wanted and onward are highlighting where the line is drawn between the real and the artificial, the virtual and genuine. And imo, having characters who blur the line between the mechanical world and the real and the spiritual adds pretty well to that whole theme. We just haven't seen everything play out yet since we're only partway through the arc.

I understand if you disagree, but I think writing it off as something to consider would be the wrong move personally. Hope you have a nice day :D

[therealgchu]

WIP Wednesday - To the Shore

hey, check it out, actually doing a main fic thing! mainly cos my brane is still stuck in the middle of chapter 4 of Seven Days, and i'm getting real tired of its shit. so tired of it that, apparently, i'm writing back on my main fic.

tagging the coemancer crew, and anyone else if you want to share a WIP.

anyway, something fuzzy and warm for today's WIP wednesday. i've skipped a bit ahead, but not too far. still trying to plot out some major plot points and how that's all going to happen.

if you want to read To the Shore from the beginning, check it out here.

there's also the backstories, Anamnesis here. i'll be putting some some spicy backstories soon, but it'll be in a different fic since i don't want to muddy the tags for the OG backstories.

and, Seven Days, if my brane ever gets chapter 4 finished.

on with the sneak peek!

“I want a bunk bed,” Cora said.

Sam smiled, “I think we can do that, right Hwa?” he asked as he turned to her.

Hwa smiled, “Of course. Why a bunk bed?”

“So, I can put my plushies on top!” Cora answered.

“Makes sense,” Hwa nodded, “yeah, no problem.”

“And, I want a computer, of course. Have you seen the new processors that came out recently? Some of them can get up to a couple petaflops!” Cora gushed. “I’ve got the specs written down,” she announced as she rummaged through her backpack

Sam looked in askance at his daughter, “That might be pretty expensive, gumdrop,” he said, attempting to temper her enthusiasm.

Hwa grinned at the girl, the first real smile she’d had in weeks. “Don’t worry about computers. I’ve already got some specc’d out for the both of us.”

“Hey, don’t I get to have a say?” Sam interrupted. 

Hwa moved over to stand by Cora’s side and the two looked at each other, then looked back to Sam. “Umm…Dad, would you even know what we’re talking about?” Cora asked.

He grunted and shook his head. “Fine, you two do whatever. No illegal stuff, though, got it?”

“Yessss,” both answered sarcastically.

“Good,” he said as Cora raced down to her berth in the lower deck. Sam crossed the way and put his arm around Hwa’s waist. “It’s good to see you smiling again, darlin,” he said as he kissed her cheek.

She leaned against his chest, “I’m sorry. I know it’s been hard on the both of you,” she said.

“There’s nothing to apologize for,” he said as he gave her waist a squeeze. “I’m glad we’re going back to Ternion. I kinda missed working on the homestead.”

The term made her smile, “Homestead, huh? Your Akila is showing,” she ribbed him.

“Well now, miss, I reckon that as an Akila man, born and raised, we should rightly call our home a homestead. It only sounds right and proper,” Sam said, laying it on thick.

Hwa laughed as Sam cocked his hat to her. They both heard Cora moan from the lower deck, “Daaddd! That’s terrible!” she shouted. He grinned even wider.

“Really, though, we should come up with a name,” Hwa said.

A herd of small horses was heard on the lower deck as Cora made her way back and up the ladder. “I want to name it!” she shouted.

Hwa and Sam looked at each other, both seeing agreement on the other’s face. “Sure, gumdrop. What do you want to name the homestead?”

“Pemberley!” Cora said excitedly.

Sam looked quizzically while Hwa chuckled, “It’s Mr. Darcy’s estate,” Hwa explained.

“I remember that now, thought it sounded familiar,” Sam said, scratching his head.

“You don’t like it,” Cora said, crestfallen.

“It’s not that I don’t like it, it’s that, well, I don’t think we’re a ‘Pemberley Estate’ sort of family,” Sam explained.

“We could be if we wanted to be,” Cora wheedled, pouting a bit.

“Cora, I don’t think I could be an ‘Estate’ person if I tried,” he said, trying not to be too harsh.

“How about a compromise,” Hwa interjected, “Pemberley Homestead,” she suggested.

[unreadpoppy]

Truth (Halsin x Gwendolyn Gray)

Read on AO3

Summary: Halsin wakes up in the middle of the night and finds Gwen is drinking.

A/N: basically Gwen's backstory explained from her perspective. Also this was written on the notes app so the paragraphs are a bit weird

Halsin had been removed from his transe due to a nudging in his hand. Opening one eye, he saw Scratch next to him, whining, his body tense. 

“What’s wrong, boy?” Halsin asked, scratching the dog’s head. Scratch looked towards the door, and whined again. Frowning, the druid left his bed, looking around the room. 

The room they had rented at Elfsong was spacious but not big enough to provide privacy. Scanning around, he quickly noticed that Gwen was nowhere to be found. 

“Wait here. I’ll go find her.” He told Scratch and made his way out of the room. It didn’t take long to find the tiefling, as she was sat in one of the corners of the tavern, a drink in hand. 

“If you keep doing this, you’ll drink yourself to an early grave, Gwen.” He said, as this wasn’t the first night that she was found with a bottle and stinking of alcohol. 

“Leave me be.” She groaned. Halsin sighed, putting his hand on his hips, unsure of what to do. He wasn’t with the party when it happened, only hearing half the story from Astarion. What he knew was that while exploring the city, Gwendolyn had found a family member of hers. Ever since then, Gwen was drinking. 

She rolled her eyes when she realized that the druid wasn’t going anywhere. “If you’re going to stay here, you might as well make yourself comfortable.” Looking at an empty chair, she said “Sit.” 

He did so, and stayed silent. Halsin wanted to know what was happening, but he was afraid that if he asked, she would push him away. 

And so the two stayed there, in silence. Minutes passed, and once the bottle had come to an end, Gwen spoke up. “For eighteen years, all I had was my mom.” Were the first things she said. Halsin sat straighter in his chair. 

“All I had was her, and the small cabin in the woods we called home.” Gwen didn’t look at him, only staring ahead, a distant look in her eyes. “You can imagine my surprise when I come to Baldur’s Gate only to discover I have an uncle.” She turned to look at him. “He told me about our family. That I have grandparents, and cousins. That my mom came from a rich family, that I-“ her breath got stuck in her throat, and Gwen looked down, a hand on her forehead. 

Halsin reached forwards, covering the hand that was on the table with his, a silent comfort. 

Gwen shook her hand, removing her hand from under his. “Mother always said I was the greatest gift she ever received, the very reason she kept on going. Now I know that to be a lie.” Tears filled her eyes as she looked at him. “I was no gift, or blessing, Halsin. I was a curse to my mother, and I’ve been ruining her ever since I was born.” 

Halsin frowned, inching closer. The tears on her eyes fell down her cheeks, and he wiped them. “What does this mean?” He found the courage to ask. 

Gwendolyn shook her head, taking a deep breath. looked at Halsin’s eyes, trying to still herself. “Growing up, mother told me that I had been a happy, little accident. She met a man, they laid together and soon I was born. Told me she didn’t have a family and that’s why we were alone, and that the world was too dangerous for me to be walking around.” She paused for a moment before continuing. “But then, when I came of age, she told me who my father was. A cambion, Halsin.“

That Gwendolyn was a warlock, everyone knew. That her patron was her father, however, was news to the druid. Suddenly, her recent behavior began to make sense. 

He had seen how the tieflings from Elturel had suffered a lot just by being distant descendants from the devils. He could only wonder how it would feel to know that one was so closely related to the Hells. 

Halsin moved his chair even closer to hers, placing a hand on her back and rubbing it, as more tears feel down from her eyes. 

“I know this is a lot of information to process, but your heritage changes little of how others will see you.” 

Gwen shook her head. “It’s not that I’m worried about.” 

Halsin frowned. “I apologize, then.” His gaze softened.  “Please, tell me what ails you, so that I can help.” 

“I think I’ve said this before. My mother was paranoid. She was always afraid that something, someone wou-would harm us. But there was more.” Gwen’s voice faltered. “Many nights, mother would scream in her sleep, as if she was in terrible pain. She’d wake up with burn scars and scratches all over her body, with no explanation. By night, they would be gone, only to return again. I didn’t understand it then but my uncle told me everything.” 

She straightened in the chair, gathering her thoughts. While Gwen composed herself, Scratch had appeared. Halsin must have left the door open, but that didn’t matter, as the dog placed his head on the tiefling’s lap. That seemed to have helped Gwen a little, as she finally spoke. 

“She was fascinated with magic, but no matter what she did, she couldn’t conjure the Weave. So, she reached out to a devil, seeking a deal. And that’s how she found my father.” Gwen looked down, petting the dog. “The deal was simple. She’d be his warlock, with unlimited powers, and in exchange, she would have to sacrifice her firstborn to him.”

“But mom didn’t have any romance going on in her life, she wouldn’t get pregnant any time soon, so the devil offered himself to father the child.”

As Halsin connected the dots, his face fell. Gwen hadn’t been an accident. Her parents had had her with one goal in mind. If her mother had gone with it, she wouldn’t be here today. 

“My mother didn’t even name me when I was born. She tried to distance herself, so that…. That the sacrifice could be easier but when the time came, she couldn’t do it.” Gwendolyn began crying again. “She couldn’t do it, Halsin, and for that, she paid the price. He tormented and tortured her in her sleep, he gave her terrible visions of death and gore and that’s why she was so scared of the world.” With one last inhale, Gwen finished the story. “My mother devoted her life to raising me, she let go of her dreams, of her mind, she was hurt just to make sure that I would live. And me, great daughter that I am, do what? I sign my soul away to the devil that ruined her life.” 

With that, Gwendolyn threw herself in Halsin’s chest, crying heavily. The druid wasn’t sure how to react, but he knew that, right now, there wasn’t much that could be done. 

He stayed there, holding Gwen in his arms,  his hand on her hair, trying to soothe her. They stayed like that for minutes, Scratch sitting in between the two. When Halsin felt Gwen beginning to calm down, he stood up, carrying her back to their room. He tucked the tiefling in bed, the dog quickly jumping and making himself comfortable near her feet. Halsin placed a kiss on her forehead, and made his way back to his own bed. 

[chee-shep]

hi !!

can I please request an angst of kaigaku x reader

[sorry it’s very long, you can use/or treat it as Idea if you want]

where they’re both on the mission and it leads into chapter 145 backstory/has girl training arc and he gives in to his own selfish desires and accepts his offer to become a demon and reader leaves the barn or whatever they were in, with guilt that she couldn’t stop UM 1, kaigaku from turning demon and of course the civilians blood on her hands that she couldn’t save from the demon to which she returns back that night, she leaves the corps and her title of tsuguko.

Thank you for taking the time to read my request

Ah, thank you for the request! I haven’t written angst before and now that I think about it it’s not something I even read, but I tried my best to write some! It ended up a bit on the shorter side, so I’m sorry about that. I think I shall call this one: "Betrayal" Warning(s): Angst, mention of Jigoro's suicide

“Kaigaku! Quit running so far ahead!” You yelled, trying to keep up with your partner's speed. Kaigaku’s head was too far up his ass for his own good, always believing he could handle any situation. You were worried one of these days he’d get himself in over his head he’d get hurt, or even die. “Have you ever considered what Master Jigoro tells us? Work together?”

Kaigaku scoffed, slightly slowing his pace. “Oh please, that old man doesn’t know anything. I work better alone; I can’t believe I got stuck with you!” He growled as you rolled your eyes. The two of you soon made it to your destination. 

“The demon is here somewhere… We’re splitting up, I’m going east.” He said, dashing off without letting you speak. You shook your head, this stubborn boy you managed to fall for was such a headache. You turned west and decided to search the homes there.

You checked the first house, all were dead. The next house was the same, and so were all the other houses. Your stomach churned at the realization that you two were too late to help these people. You could only hope that Kaigaku might have found some people alive on his side. When you were sure that the demon wasn't on this side of town you quickly hurried to where Kaigaku was.

As you made your way there, you could sense the presence of a demon, but it was different. It felt like the air was heavy, dragging your body down. You slowed down, walking quietly as your body trembled. You peeked around the corner and couldn’t believe what you saw.

A demon with six eyes… Those eyes… The rank of Upper One was engraved. No, this was more than you could handle, more than either of you could handle. You looked for Kaigaku and saw him kneeling down in front of the demon, seemingly holding something in his hands. You could see his whole body shaking as he brought his hands to his mouth.

You’re eyes widened when you realized what was happening. You wanted to scream his name, to stop him from making this mistake but you couldn’t move. You could only watch as Kaigaku drank the blood that the demon had given.

After he drank he let out a scream of pain as he hunched over on the ground, the transformation setting in. “No…” You whispered, catching the Upper Rank’s attention. He grabbed Kaigaku by his hair, forcing him to sit up. He looked in your direction before he vanished.

You’re blood ran cold as Kaigaku looked at you, blood dripping down his chin as he panted. Those beautiful blue eyes now had blackness surrounding him, stripes had formed on his cheeks as his ears became pointed. He brought himself to his feet as he kept his eyes locked on you.

This wasn’t Kaigaku, this wasn’t your Kaigaku… You stepped back slowly, feeling tears forming in your eyes. “What… What is wrong with you!” You shouted at him, something you’d never done before. “Why would you do this! Why did you have to have us split up! Why-”

Your words were cut off when you were slammed against a wall, Kaigaku’s hand clamping over your mouth. “Shut. Up.” He growled, “If we were together we both would have died, I would have been killed because of you.”

“You infuriate me, all of you! I’m not dying, I’m going to keep living, I’m going to win! You… You can run away… Tell everyone everything that’s happened, but it won’t change anything for you… You're weak… and pathetic…”

 Kaigaku threw you onto the ground before he walked away. You couldn’t bring yourself to your feet. Soon the Kakushi showed up, but you couldn’t speak, the shock lasted longer than you thought. You didn’t need to speak though, the Kasugai crows saw everything.

Shortly after the news of Kaigaku’s betrayal made it’s way through the core, the news of Master Jigoro’s suicide followed. You felt like your world was falling apart around you. You couldn’t sleep or eat anymore, every little thing felt like too much. And one day, you dropped your sword and left. Your days as a tsuguko was over, your days with the core were over. You wandered through the countryside, you didn’t know where you were going either. Weeks later, you still had no place to go. You dropped to your knees on the trail. You looked up to the moon and cried. There was nothing left, you were alone…

But what you didn’t know was that a pair of familiar blue eyes was watching you from the rooftop…

[denimbex1986]

'There are few protagonists in modern literature as challenging as Tom Ripley. He’s a captivating figure because he’s pretty pathetic yet so cunning. In many ways, Ripley is the shadow underdog, a guy who, by all evidence, should lose, yet he manages to commit multiple murders and steal millions while evading capture. Despite coming from a poor/working-class background, Ripley has evolved refined tastes mainly because he believes he deserves to live the best life possible. Other people are inconveniences most of the time, hindrances to him enjoying the luxury offered to the wealthiest among us. If ever there was a character to highlight the negative aspects of sociopathy, an actual condition that isn’t as one-dimensional as much media would like you to think. Ripley can’t seem to care about anyone other than himself; it troubles him, but it is not enough to stop his pursuit of comfort.

Tom Ripley (Andrew Scott) is down on his luck, running an insurance scam out of a PO Box in New York City. He is contacted by a private investigator working for Mr. Greenleaf, the father of a very brief acquaintance Tom once had. The patriarch wants to send Tom to Italy to find his son, Richard (Johnny Flynn), and convince him to return to the States. With the insurance scam being discovered, Tom decides that a journey abroad might be the thing he needs. Upon arriving, he finds Richard living a life of leisure, devoting his time to painting – and very badly. Richard is in a relationship with Marge (Dakota Fanning), an aspiring photojournalist whose talent for that is as good as her boyfriend’s when it comes to painting. Tom realizes he’s wearing out his welcome and that Richard will soon kick him to the curb. But our protagonist isn’t going to let that happen and begins a descent into murder and fraud that threatens to destroy him if he’s caught.

Andrew Scott delivers a stunning performance of Ripley. Because the main character is doing such horrible things and cannot see the humanity in others, it presents a challenge for an actor. How do you find empathy for such a person? Scott does it; he presents Ripley not as a clockwork-brained genius but as a person who sees himself outside the world he lives in. He’s an observer of people and can see them better than they can see themselves. Ripley recognizes Richard’s mediocrity, that he’s someone coasting off other people’s labor. Richard doesn’t live in Italy because he worked hard for it; Daddy just gave him money.

That doesn’t mean Ripley is a Robin Hood figure. He’s a shadow of that archetype. He steals from the rich to make himself rich. The idea of charity would never cross Ripley’s mind. Through bits of backstory, we learn his parents drowned to death when Ripley was five, and he was raised by his cruel Aunt Dottie. This is likely why he’s such a quiet, introverted, observant person and why his emotions never developed in a way that would lead to a healthy life. As far as Ripley can see, the world is where people crush one another to get what they want. Most of the time, people like Ripley live passively reticent lives. He refuses that and believes if he is willing to do horrible things, to take human life, then he deserves the spoils that come with it.

While Ripley’s exploits in the novels of Patricia Highsmith always took place in Europe, he is very much an American character. Despite the mythologizing we are fed during our formative years in the U.S., it is a country built on guile and murder. From the genocide & displacement of the Native people all the way up to our present multitude of horrors, the United States has been a place that has justified violence to take what it wants. As individualism dominates the structure through which the average American sees themselves, I expect more people like Tom Ripley to be produced. Therefore, he’s incapable of seeing community as a possibility and is left with nothing more than killing whoever stands in the way of his spoils.

While Anthony Minghella’s 1999 adaptation The Talented Mr. Ripley has a more glamorous take on the material, this mini-series explores the depth of sadness in its characters. Shot in black & white, the series evokes the imagery of Italian film icons like Federico Fellini and Michelangelo Antonini. Much like Antonini’s work, there’s a sense of ennui throughout each episode. Richard and Marge live comfortably, but there’s a sense that they are aware of their mediocrity. Marge keeps hammering away at her book on the coastal town of Atrani, but she seems to know it’s not great. Richard understands that he lives on his father’s work, who in turn exploits workers to generate his wealth, and that he hasn’t earned anything he has. At the same time, they like living comfortably, and whether they deserve it or not, they will keep it that way. Ripley just wants a slice, and when it becomes clear they are pushing him to leave, he decides he’ll take even more than that.

Each episode contains so much here, but not in the way of dialogue. Series director-writer Steven Zaillian lets scenes breathe and understands exposition doesn’t have to come from characters speaking. The camera can deliver all the information you need to know. It’s an idea that filmmakers like Hitchcock played with, juxtaposing two images to create an affect. A camera lingering on a heavy glass ashtray in one scene takes on a different meaning after that object is used in a crime. It becomes an ominous totem of evil left out in plain sight. We hold our breath when a visiting Roman detective flicks off his ashes in it. Ripley dances so close to the edge.

The show chooses not to make Ripley’s sexuality as clearly defined as the 1999 film does, which is a good thing. Apparently, Highsmith decided to play it with more nuance in the text, so here we have a Ripley who is attracted to men but maybe also women. Perhaps he’s not attracted to them at all, but studying them, envying what they have, calculating what use they could be to him. Ripley also isn’t some master of disguise or deceit. He tries things out, and they work most of the time. He poses as Richard for a long chunk of the show, but most people don’t care or notice. Several hotel desk clerks reveal that they can lie about almost anything for the right amount of coin in their palm.

Ripley comes to represent the con artist, a uniquely American figure. He’s the power of positive thinking taken to a dark, craven core. Anything Ripley sets his mind on, he can do, including murdering several people and disposing of their bodies. The crudeness of Ripley’s acts stands out the most, with an entire episode being taken up mainly by the protagonist getting rid of a body and running into trouble because of a broken elevator. His murders are never committed with much pre-meditation, either. Ripley grabs an object and beats someone over the head with it, revealing the impulsivity of his desires.

This was an absolutely remarkable series to watch, and it made me curious about picking up Highsmith’s novel and reading it sometime. Andrew Scott is one of the best actors working today and delivers such a rich, layered performance that sometimes feels like a magic trick. The supporting players all do fantastically, with the standout being Maurizio Lombardi as Inspector Ravini. He shows up in the last four episodes of the series, but I loved every second he was on camera. You may think Ripley has met his match, but that would be the expected direction the story would take. Instead, this show has more complex ideas in mind.'

[ramblingroommate]

Watching 9-1-1 for the first time

Ok the canonically bi firefighter got me. I’ve been seeing gifs of “the gay firefighter show” for around two years and I gotta be honest… I never gave it a chance. It was fun seeing people post about the show here and there but I mentally categorized it as “yet another queer coded queerbaiting show tumblr goes crazy for… been there done that”. But making one of the characters from the main ship (from what I understand) CANONICALLY queer after SEVEN SEASONS? A MONTH BEFORE PRIDE? Okay now I just have to watch it.

So here I am. Watching it for the first time and writing about it. This is more exciting than I expected tbh. Oh! Just to make it clear: I have never seen a single episode of this show but I have heard quite a few things about the characters over the years. But I never paid that much attention? So I’m not even sure what I actually know… I’ll figure it out when I get to it I guess.

Episode 1x1: Pilot

I like that straight off the bat the VERY FIRST thing they say is that there are two types of emergencies: the immediate abrupt ones and the long term slowly corroding ones. This character (Abby?) is a 911 operator and has a mother with Alzheimer so she’s pretty familiar with both types of emergencies. What a way to introduce a character! Also I like her voice, it’s soothing.

Here they are! Nice to finally officially meet you guys. Oh, I guess that’s something I know: I know all the characters names even tho I can’t really match most of them with a face. I obviously recognize Buck. And I know Eddie gets introduced in season 2. I’m guessing the older guy that seems to be in charge is Bobby? I think he’s like their boss or something? I hope the bits and pieces of info I know won’t start to mix in my head.

Also those are the worst compressions I have ever seen in my life. Can we put a little more effort in this cpr?

I mean… yeah? Mmmh. Okay that line threw me off for a moment. On one hand, of course they hang up after help gets there, that’s why they called in the first place. THEY are the ones in need, it’s about them not about you.

On the other hand, I think I understand what they’re trying to say… it has to be hard to not know if you actually helped or not, not have that closure. A nurse, a doctor, a firefighter know if the person they were called in to help was actually saved or not. Whether it’s good or bad, at least they get the closure of knowing. A 911 operator might be there for the worst part and then that’s it. On to the next one. Never thought about that before.

Oof that’s not gonna work. I mean I understand why he would say it and i remember an article talking exactly about this but… that’s not something that’s gonna help her in the moment.

… yeah

Tho I gotta say… they actually showed her fall, I didn’t expect it. It shows the kinda budget this show has, doing a stunt like that for a character you see for 3 minutes. Maybe a bit cold on my part to focus on that but oh well

Mmmh… a black book with names written inside. Either this has suddenly become Death Note or he has a Secret Past TM. There are also numbers… probably the number of people he couldn’t save in some tragic accident and somehow feels responsible for? And now he wants to make up for it by saving the same number of people. If that’s the case then it’s peak tv drama.

Ok wait wait slOW DOWN THERE, I CAN’T KEEP UP. Twenty seconds of conversation and I learned Bobby is a devout christian ex addict (alcohol and painkillers) who got in trouble with the department and spent ten years in and out of rehab AND has only been back for 18 months??? I wasn’t expecting to be told so much backstory so soon.

And then they immediately cut to Buck… is he a sex addict? Is that what they’re implying here? Gonna ignore everything else that happens on screen because firehose? Really?

WAIT A FUCKING SECOND

THIS SHOW IS MADE BY RYAN MURPHY?!?!???! AND BRAD FALCHUK TOO, THE TWO GUYS WHO ALSO MADE GLEE?

WHY DIDN’T ANYONE TELL ME WHAT THE FUUUUUUU-

Okay so I have much more to say about this show than I thought so I’m gonna split my comments in more parts (part 2 here)

[icey--stars]

Born For Tragedy: Part 3

Series Index

She was tragedy. Nothing except death, fear and pain followed in her wake. When she was young, she was beaten. Now she’s the one doing the beating as an assassin. A mysterious stranger comes to her, paying an absurd amount of money for her to kill Beron Vanserra, and protect the eldest son until the job is done. She stumbles across a story much similar to her own, and knows what must be done.

↢ 『 ☾ 』 ↣

“What happened,” Eris deadpanned. “You look like you’re about to murder somebody.”

Valda held back a snarl. “I’m fine,” she snapped, yanking her arm from Eris’s hold.

“Where’d you come from?” The heir of the Autumn Court asked, tilting his head, assessing her.

“The High Lord’s bedroom. Do you need something?” Valda needed to get out. Out of this house and work off her tension. Seeing abuse like that? Oh, she wanted to kill. She didn’t care who, and if she stayed here, it might end up being someone she needed to not kill.

Eris’s brows furrowed. “What did he do?”

“Nothing,” Valda snapped.

“Adira,” Eris growled. A warning. “Answer me.”

Valda bit her lip. “What for?” She countered.

“Did he hit my mother?” Eris asked.

Valda’s face fell. “You know?” She growled. Fuck protecting Eris if he knew and wasn’t trying to protect her-

“That bastard,” Eris cursed and turned to march down the hall. Straight toward Beron’s bedroom.

Valda jogged after him. “Don’t, he’s pissed. It was because of me.” Don’t what? She questioned herself.

“You caused it?!” Eris snarled, turning on the ball of his foot, directing a rageful gaze on her. She didn’t know if that was better or worse than what he was about to go do. She had a pretty good guess on what might’ve happened, what potentially Eris might’ve done, and what would happen to him.

Valda paused, subtly widening her stance. “I was in a room I wasn’t supposed to be in without him present. What are you doing?”

“You don’t have authority to ask that,” Eris dismissed. “Go clean or something.” Eris turned to continue marching, and Valda made an impulsive decision.

“I heard about Taunya,” Valda said quickly. “She’s your pregnant ghost hound, isn’t she? A rarity, to have so many, with more on the way.”

Eris paused. “Why are you trying to stop me?” He asked, seeing the action for what it was.

Valda shrugged. The fight had faded from her blood. “I don’t know what you’re about to do,” she answered honestly. “But I know that it isn’t going to be good.”

“What would you do? If your father hit your mother?” Eris asked, turning back to face her. The rage was still evident with his furrowed brows and frown.

“He did,” Valda answered. “My father hit me, my mother, my brother, and they hit me in return. I know exactly what it’s like. I almost killed him with my magic once.” She regretted that last sentence as soon as it came out of her mouth. She was supposed to have weak magic.

Eris paused, and his shoulders seemed to slump. “Fine,” he stated. “I won’t, if you tell me the truth about your origin, magic and fighting backstory.”

Valda clenched her jaw. “Why do you want to know?”

“You don’t use ‘my lord’ at the end of every sentence. You can kill people with your magic and you know how to wield weapons, and yet you claim to be a nanny and a cleaner.”

So he went and checked her written history then. She turned her head away.

“What are you going to do to Beron?”

Eris swallowed. He didn’t answer. Valda saw him shift his weight to his other foot. It was subtle, but she was trained to notice the small differences in people’s stances. It helped indefinitely in a fight, to understand how your opponent moved.

“Fine,” Valda allowed. “But I’m not telling you how I learned to fight.”

“At least you admit it,” Eris sighed. “Fine, come on.”

Valda lifted a brow and moved to follow the heir into his chambers, and then into his study. There was only one hound there.

Valda laid the broom she still held against the wall, and watched the hound stand, stretch and move to greet its owner. Eris pulled out a second chair from behind the bookshelf and gestured for her to sit. She did but made sure that the skirt didn’t ride up to reveal the weapons she had under.

“Why?” Valda asked. She didn’t understand why Eris wanted to bring her to his room and talk. About her, nonetheless.

Eris hummed non-committedly. “It’s better than ending up where I was headed.”

“Where were you headed?”

“Don’t ask things you won’t get the answer to. Answer my questions,” Eris redirected.

Valda still wanted to know. Was he about to be headed towards Beron’s hand? Did Beron abuse his sons as well? Oh… Valda had even more reasons to kill him now.

“I don’t know why I have magic like mine,” she answered honestly. It was honest. “I was born to a poor family in Hewn City. Miners.”

“Why aren’t you still there? From my knowledge, Rhysand keeps that place locked down.”

Valda grinned, focusing on the floor tiles. “My father stole something from the lord, and got killed for it. My brother sent me to kill the lord without any training and a kitchen knife, and Rhysand killed the lord instead. I ran away. Simple as that.”

“To the Autumn Court?” Eris asked.

“Well, it’s warmer in the winter months,” Valda said, lying now. She didn’t run to the Autumn Court. Not at all. After she tried to steal the coat of an assassin in the Winter Court, she’d found herself forced into training.

“Show me your magic,” he ordered.

Valda lifted her gaze now, meeting Eris’s. “Doesn’t that seem a bit counterproductive, general? I’m a cleaner. Not a mage.”

“Show me.”

Valda rolled her eyes and then reached for the darkness resting within her. A wild animal that was only ever placated into temporary calmness. She controlled the shadowy, misty darkness that revealed itself, floating around her body. “Happy?” She asked Eris.

“Can you winnow?”

“That’s irrelevant,” she answered. “Now, who’s the hound?”

The dog at Eris’s feet perked up, the floppy ears moving. Valda gave it a little grin.

Eris sighed, rubbing his face. “Percy.”

The dog looked at his owner expectantly. Valda recognized the name. “Lady Merle gave you him. Your first.”

“You were talking with Merle?” Eris asked, snapping his gaze right back to hers.

“Beron didn’t see, don’t worry,” Valda placated, yanking her darkness back inside. Luckily, being able to wield darkness wasn’t a tell that she was the Shadow. “Merle is a kind female. I quite like her.”

Eris narrowed his eyes. “You were ordered out, and were angry when he hit her?”

Valda’s throat tightened but she nodded. “I was going to go work it off in the forest.”

There was a beat of silence between them. Valda watched Eris as he contemplated things, and Valda thought about what else she might be able to share to get out of here. Just because that killing rage had been calmed, didn’t mean it was gone.

“I doubt you’re a nanny,” Eris spoke.

Valda rolled her eyes. “You think I didn’t have to protect those children? They were poor, Eris. All of them. Many times, I found myself fighting off people, or animals.” A carefully, and quickly crafted lie. She always did have a knack for improvising and playing a character.

“So you learned to wield a sword?” Eris emphasized. “I highly doubt that.”

“I’m not sharing how I learned to fight, general. That was an accidental reaction. How about you? You tell me how growing up being a High Lord’s son is. How you learned to wield whatever magic you hold.”

Eris’s lip lifted. “I have things to do,” he said suddenly, getting back to his feet. Valda lifted a brow in silent question, standing slower than him.

“Very well, general,” Valda said, leaving her questions to the dust. She silently picked up her broom and left the chambers of the heir. He was quite suspicious. Sometimes a hardened exterior, but it seemed to have various cracks that she could poke at if she wanted to.

She had a quick lunch and managed to evade Nova as she escaped out a side door of the Forest House, heading into the forest. Once there, she finally felt like she could take a breath. Sort of. The sound of Beron hitting Merle still echoed through her ears and sparked the rage simmering within. The rage mixed with her darkness, and she let it free, covering the little clearing she’d found.

Then she drew her daggers and began going through forms. She first held twin daggers in her hands, just sitting in a relaxed stance, then she flipped them around and swung a punch, and stabbed someone’s metaphorical face. Then she turned and threw a high kick. She took a breath, then flipped her daggers around again, and began more complex movements.

Her Masters might’ve been crude when teaching her, but she learned a lot. Her brother, Calam, had only taught her how to control her magic, not to wield it, and definitely not to wield a weapon. Or how to stop rushing blood from a wound. Or poisons. Or the bow, daggers, or sword. Or the whip. Cauldron… she’d hated learning that one. She’d been turned into a weapon by the Underworld–the assassin society ruled by the five Masters, one of which she'd taken the name of for this mission. Their words still echoed through her like a drum.

“You’re a weapon and weapons don’t weep,” Master Owyn had told her.

“Nobody is coming to save you; get up,” Master Adira had said.

“You are a murderer, no matter how beloved.” Master Fintan had bared the truth to her.

“Instead of becoming afraid, you could become something to fear,” Master Fhroce said. She had been the kindest. Only by a bare margin, though. She was anything but kind. 

When Valda killed her, she’d told her Master, “I’m afraid,” and stabbed her.

“I could tear you apart if I wanted to,” Master Remelle had growled. He had been the worst.

Valda remembered each one, and she remembered watching the life drain from their eyes. They’d beaten her, whipped her, and hit her as they wished, just like her family. When she saw happy children on a longer assignment, she had a realization. She didn’t plan anything. She just killed them all and strung up their bodies in front of the Winter Court’s palace, for all to see. She was that powerful, to stop the guards, and kill the strongest assassins in Prythian. That’s why she has such a name for herself. That’s why she was employed to kill a High Lord. She had to remember that or all would fail.

When she finally felt like she’d worked off that tension through her daggers and magic, she returned to the Forest House, a bit more sweaty and tired, but it was late enough in the evening that she didn’t have to do any more chores and just got to eat dinner and go to bed.

↢ 『 ☾ 』 ↣

TAGLIST (see post for getting added)

@bunnymallowo, @officiallyunofficialperson, @margssstuff, @rebloggiest-reblogger, @inpraizeof, @graciereads, @eos-princess, @imma-too-many-fandoms, @mali22, @sassybluebird,

[khepiari]

Why Kuina’s Death Still Unsettles Us?

TW: mention of suicide, references teen/child suicide.

[I read a post about "falling down the stairs" might actually imply death by suicide. Kuina's death always bothered me a bit, and when Shimotsuki Koushiro said to Zoro, humans are fragile, did he really mean our bodies or our hearts? I still wonder. A few months back I had written a fic, a retelling of the events which led to Kuina's fall from the stairs, and I had done a lot of thinking while writing the fic. So all those ideas and thoughts I had then, have been rearranged and put here today.]

I remember watching the Kuina episode like 19 years back. So for an 11-year-old me, that was it. I was sad that she was gone too soon.

But over the years as I grew up, read the manga and then kept rereading it over and over. I did feel her death was surprisingly given the off-stage treatment that was given to Lady Macbeth! Only an announcement was made of her death, and her face is covered in a piece of cloth! That was too sudden, unlike so many other deaths that followed in the story.

I did brainstorm this over the years, it really felt odd, she was a physically strong 12-year-old girl and as far as I know swordswoman/man have to be good at balancing and footwork, because the art of the sword is about full body movement so her falling down is really really really iffy.

Image from chapter 5

And if we look at the Dojo architecture, there were no visible storeys to the building, I am sure she didn’t fall off a library step-stool or carpenter’s ladder. Then I found this Tumblr post, by Heeheemugee which said, falling down the stairs is a euphemism for suicide. Which makes sense! Like it totally connects in my head.

Though, sadly, I didn’t find any source to confirm this, as everyone on the internet told me it's untrue. But, you see, “falling down the stairs” is a euphemism which has been used for domestic violence victims, like in my mother tongue, when it's hard to explain to a child what happened to someone who died, we say the person has gone somewhere far, so may be falling down the stairs is more of an undocumented euphemism or an old reference Odachii picked from somewhere— he is known for this!

Image from chapter 5

Another thing we should remember Kuina was onset of puberty, the stress of future, her father’s general view of female body being weaker, and changing bodily features might have plagued her more than we think— since after 1000 chapters we know Zoro’s teacher is likely from Wano, I think internalized and cultural misogyny was at play too.

Teenage and puberty is a vulnerable time, one misstep can lead to drastic actions, so Kuina taking her own life is not farfetched. Because we have young children who are so stressed or vulnerable or suffering that they think ending it is better than enduring it.

Image from chapter 5

What has bothered me the most, is the offstage treatment of her death. I mean—we have seen most of the “characters whose death impacted the main characters' life decisions” die on stage in backstories so far, or we got a proper explanation of why someone is dead. We know Banchina died after an illness, Bellemere was killed by Arlong, Hililuk was poisoned and blew himself up. Only Kuina’s death we didn’t see, and it immediately happened just after both Zoro and Kuina had a heartfelt conversation about becoming the best swordsman/woman in the world!

I guess Oda chose “fell down the stairs” as the series was like 15 chapters till then. Or it maybe as simple as Odachii wanted to wrap Zoro’s backstory fast with typical “dead girl-friend of the grumpy emotionally suppressed lone wolf” to establish Zoro’s narrative as the one who carries the will of others!

Image from chapter 5

Otherwise, we know Eiichiro Oda doesn’t shy away from depicting gruesome, terrifying or horrible deaths which parallels real life issues, he sneaked in a little panel of a grandmother praying and a mother holding a knife with an infant in her arms in Wano arc, because they were starving for days!

Image from chapter 918

Or a pirate in human auction house biting his tongue to escape the humiliation of being sold as a slave!

Images from chapter 502

Hence, I think Kuina’s death doesn’t seem like an accident and feel like something sadder and heavier than we were led to believe.