#He's very invested in theatrical plays

[scarapanna]

Beetle. . . I wanna hold your newest Shilk design so gently-

:3 <- forgot what sign off I used for my witch’s puppet cookie oc- so just call me puppet anon

- Puppet (Cookie) Anon

Awaa glad to know y'all like him!!

You may hold him, but be careful! He can be a bit feisty sometimes

[ellecdc]

First off

You survived your exams 🫡

2ndly, this is my official request for the 'potter!reader x Barty where she steals Jamies clothes' idea we were discussing ✌️

(I highlighted it in the Barty doc incase you forgot)

first of all; thank you, thank you! *bows dramatically*

secondly; here's a celebratory Barty fic

Barty Crouch Jr x Potter!reader and James is not pleased

There were a few things in life that being James Potter’s twin sister made particularly difficult.

One such thing was your ability to have friends (or, in your case, a boyfriend) not pre-approved by him.

You heard a horrified squawking sound as you made the last step down the stairs into the Gryffindor common room and looked up to see James staring at you with wide eyes while Sirius smirked, Remus rolled his eyes, and Peter groaned dramatically. 

“Where do you think you’re going!?” James demanded as he all but stepped over Peter to make his way over to you.

“Prongs, please, this is the fourth time you abandoned this chess game.” Peter whined as Sirius snickered.

“Leave the poor girl alone, James. You’re not her mother.” Remus chided, causing you to raise your eyebrows at your brother as if saying “yeah!”

“Where are you going?” James amended with an eye roll of his own.

“Slytherin.” You answered simply, crossing your arms over your chest as you challenged your brother head on.

“And what are you wearing?” He continued displeasing; plucking at the long-sleeved t-shirt you currently adorned between his two fingers as if it was something particularly disgusting he’d found on the side of the road. 

You scoffed derisively as you swatted his hands away. “What? Are joggers and a long sleeved shirt not modest enough, James?”

He narrowed his eyes at you as he petulantly swatted you back for having swatted him. “These are boys' clothes, Y/N; you’re wearing a boy’s clothes. Oh my Godric; you’re sleeping with him, aren’t you!” He accused theatrically. 

He spun on the spot to face his friends and dragged you beside him roughly by the arm as he pointed at you. “She’s wearing his clothes! Junior is defiling my sister.”

And though that wasn’t technically untrue, it wasn’t the fucking point, or any of his business.

“James!” You shouted over his panicked trade, ignoring Peter’s protests at him being “far too invested in his own sister’s sexual habits.”

“James Fleamont Potter!” You bellowed, grabbing your brother by a fistful of his hair and pulling his face towards you. “This is your shirt. I took it from your trunk.” 

James froze in his place; hunched over like a ventriloquist dummy that you were controlling by means of his hair as he took a second look at your outfit. 

A brief look of embarrassment flashed across his features as his eyes flit back up to yours.

“Huh.” He chuckled awkwardly. “Funny that.”

You sneered at him and shoved him away from you. “As lovely as this was, Jamie, I’ll be leaving.”

“Wait! No!” James started, reaching for you before he was being physically redirected back towards the couch by Remus.

“Come on, James; leave your sister alone, yeah?” He said jovially as he thumped James on the back twice. 

“Go on, Princess, while he’s distracted. And don’t do anything I wouldn’t do!” Sirius called, shooting you a salacious wink.

You barked a laugh and shook your head. “That doesn’t leave much off limits, Black.”

James squawked again as Sirius laughed boisterously and you left the Gryffindor common room behind you. 

Blessedly, the noise level (and general vibe) in the Slytherin common room was far more relaxed as you stepped through the door.

 Barty whipped his head towards the sound sporting a very severe expression on his face until his eyes landed on you, causing his expression to turn into a beaming smile as he flipped the chess board he’d been in the middle of playing with Evan over; telling his friend to “get fucking lost, my girl is here.” 

You chuckled at Evan’s petulant grumblings as Barty swept you up off your feet into a bear hug and breathed you in. 

“What took you so long, angelcakes?” He said through a sigh as he placed you back onto your feet, though kept your face secure within his hands as he smiled down at you.

“I had to fight off my brother on my way.” 

Barty rolled his eyes dramatically and lowered his voice. “If you need me to kill him, just say the word, Princess; he’ll never bother you again.”

You chuckled and teasingly smacked his arm. “Brothers are meant to be a bother; that’s what they’re put on this earth for.”

Regulus offered you a ‘hear, hear’ as Barty escorted you towards his dorm room. 

You were no sooner curled up against Barty on his bed when he was pulling you away from him and scrutinising your form.

“What are you wearing?” He asked bemusedly.

You groaned dramatically and threw yourself back onto the bed. “What is it with everyone and their obsession with my outfit!?”

“It’s not the outfit, it’s the shirt.” Barty explained, sitting up to get a better look at you.

“It’s just a shirt - not even a very nice one at that.” You muttered, looking down at the random shirt you’d pilfered from your brother’s trunk; why were boys clothes so much more comfortable!?

“How dare you!” Barty bristled in offence. “I spent a lot of my father’s dirty money on that shirt!”

You looked at your boyfriend with furrowed brows. “Barty, this isn’t your shirt?”

“I know - I bought it for Reg for his birthday last year.”

This was Regulus’ shirt?

But…

“Barty…” You started slowly, realisation dawning on you as you met your boyfriends bemused eyes. “I stole this shirt from Jamie’s room.”

Barty’s brows furrowed further as he looked back down at your James’ Regulus’ shirt. “Why…why would Potter have Reg’s shirt?”

You let the silence sit for a few moments before each of you were scrambling from Barty’s bed and racing to the common room.

“Are you sleeping with my brother!?” You shouted at the same time Barty screeched, “you’re fucking a Potter too!?”

Regulus had looked up from his book though staunchly refused to look at you; and whilst his face remained impassive, a furious blush overtook his face.

“I’M TELLING SIRIUS!” You shouted as you turned and bolted towards the door; Regulus hot on your heels shouting “don’t you fucking dare!”, and Barty cackling madly as he followed the two of you up to Gryffindor tower.

[itsss4t4n]

How long is Forever? - Harry Hook x daughter of alice in wonderland

Headcanons but the longer version of this post:

a/n: this is based more on tim burtons aiw adaptation as it is the only one that i know, and i might have misremembered some of the story/ characters so i apologize if its inaccurate to wonderland or its characters in any way. I got way to invested in creating the character and story and almost forgot that that wasnt the point. At some point i think the character just completely changes and i low key hate it. Im really bad at writing headcannons instead of full fledged fics.

Trigger warnings: fighting, she /her pronouns used, slight angst toward the end but happy ending, not proofread

-being alices daughter you are considered kind of weird by the aks, (think luna lovegood), you are kind of dreamy and constantly in your own thoughts but you still have a very strong own opinion on everything. You say what you think even if others might not like that. 

-You also have a very different sense of style than most girls in auradon. You played alot with different colours and textures always looking slightly crazy (you took inspiration from your godfather, the mad hatter). Your blonde hair was cut to a short messy bob with short bangs, and always changing coloured streaks throughout.

-you dont have the same view of good and bad as most others , and you dont think the vks should be judged by what their parents did and immediately try to befriend them and continuesly defend them

-when mal runs away to the isle you insist on joining the other vks and ben, as you do well in new and different invironments and later because you are an incredible sword fighter, your mother having thought you all she knows, just in case you ever needed to fight a jabberwookie type beast yourself.

-Due to your personal style not being very auradon, you didnt really have to disguise as much as ben when going to the isle. 

-On the isle you felt surprisingly comfortable, as you liked the weird and almost liminal athmosphere that it had 

-the first time you met harry was right after bens kidnapping, when harry came to tell you all about it.

-Harry has this theatrical almost a little eccentric way of talking and moving, which intruiged you pretty quickly. Of course , You didnt like or trust him, he did just kidnap one of your best friends, but you were intruiged non the less.

"And who is this little lassy?"

You told him your name with a glint of interest and mischif in your eyes. "Daughter of Alice in Wonderland."

"How interesting."

"I was just thinking the same thing. Whats your Name?"

"Harry Hook." He introduced himself with adramatic bow, before making fun of jay and barking at carlos.

- The other three had watched the interaction in confusion and wonder. They knew you were a little odd but seeming this confortable with harry after knowing what he did to ben?

"What was that?!" 

"What?" 

"Dont be nice to hook! He just kidnapped your best friend!"

"yea.. But he is quite interesting." And as an afterthougt: "and kind of pretty dont you think?"

"NO! Concentrate please. He is the enemie alright?!"

"Yea whatever, lets go tell mal about this shit."

-You go with Mal and evie to see dizzy, and instantly get along.

-Later while Mal and Uma are talking (singing), you cant help your eyes from glancing over at harry every few seconds. He did look good, with his red coat, the old silver jook on his left hand, and the messy black eyeshadow around his striking blue eyes.

"He is really beutiful dont you think?" That question was mostly directed towards evie who just shot you a dissapproving look. "I'm just saying. purely aesthetically."

-You simply shrugged and watched the situation continue to unfold, swordhand on the hilt of your sword at your side. When the fight breaks out you stand against harry. For better of for forse.

"Hello Pretty boy." You raise you swordand get into a defensive position.

"Wonderland girl."

-You kept making little comments about his looks and his sword fighting which he of course returned in his own flirty way. You quite enjoyed going back and forth like that. Witty comments, smirks and flirty smiles, and fighting more for show at this point instead of actually trying to beat each other. Trying to make this surprisingly pleasant moment last as long as possible.

-until you heard an urgend shout of your name from Mal.

"Sorry in advance." In a quick movement you snatched harrys hook and threw it down into the water. Before a shoked Harry can jump after it you catch his arm and talk to him in a slightly hushed voice.

"I really hope this wasnt our last meeting pretty boy." Before running off with the others.

-You dont see each other again until Audrey turns evil, but you do still think about harry. Is it stupid considering you met like twice and he was you enemy? Yea. Did you care? not really. He was georgeous, funny, good with a sword. Your dream guy. Except for the fact that he was supposedly your enemy. but then again when had you ever cared about that kinda stuff.

-His black lined blue piercing eyes were burned into your brain.

-In the six months until you saw him again you had become mal and bens unofficial bodyguard, spening most of your time with them or with evie, your sword has taken permanent residence at your side, only taking it of to sleep or shower and even then it was always in grabbing distance. Mals paranoia about uma had actually started to get to you.

-You are at evies house when audrey shows up and spells mal. You join them in going back to the isle to retrieve hades ember.

-When your bikes get stolen you cant help but smile at the sight. Yea its shitty but he is still beautiful.

"Pretty boy!"

He drawls you name in his scottish accent and you mentally swoon.

"Thats my bike!"

"Oh yea? Come and get it back then." Before driving of.

-You run after them (except mal and celia ofc),and at one point you split upbecause the boys on the bikes did so. You follow harry and when the others are out of sight he slows to a stop. You catch up to him with a grin.

"Nice to see you again Hook. I was hoping we would meet again."

"I was too Lassie."

-The next 10-ish minutes are filled with flirty banter and tales of what happened in the last six months. It felt like you've known each other for years (as clichee as that sounds). 

-You almost forgot why you were there until you heard jay shouting your name.

"Where are you, Mal got the thing come on."

You quickly turn to Harry again.

"Go! Before they see you and make it a whole thing."

"What bout your bike?"

"Keep it pretty boy, i doubt the others got theirs back so it would be weird if i did."

With a last sly grin harry leans towards you "I will see you again very soon." 

Before you could question what 'very soon' meant, he had already driven of. 

Just in time because Jay and the others turned the corner behind you.

"There you are! What are you doing? come on!"

"Sorry. Was chasing after the bike." You Give them a small smile before walking past them. "You coming?"

-To say you were surprised when harry and gil jumped through the barries after them would be an understatement.

"Pretty boy?!"

"'ello Darling. we're just coming for a wee visit" 

-You tried , just like evie, to get the two groups to work together. Harry mostly walked next to you or Uma. At some point you hung back so he culd walk in between you and doesnt have to kep switching. He caught up with uma but still kept the constant flirts towards you up.

-Everyone was really confused on why you two seemed so good and almost comfortable around each other, not to mention the flirting. Evie was the only one who knew of your little crush so she send you a few knowing smirks.

-During the knight fight you and harry fought as a team. Incedibly well might i say. 

-You were somewhat enthusiastic about evies icebreaker idea, enjoying the idea that the two groups could finally work together.

"Harry great accent."

"Shes right. It is a good accent."

-The flirting just wouldnt stop, comments thrown at each other, bumping shoulders while walking, even brushing your hands against each others on occasion. You had joined the boys in looking for ben.

"To make sure jay and harry dont kill each other."

-Gil doing the icebreaker and bonding with jay. 

meanwhile you and harry in the background:

"We should do that icebreaker pretty boy."

"oh yea?"

"Yea. You've got really pretty eyes."

"And you are really good with a sword lass." His hook just slightly gracing your cheek before something in gil and jays conversation sparks his interest.

-When finding ben you had immediately pushed harry behind you and unsheathed your sword out of instinct. Jay has to pull both of you out of bens way because both of you got distrcated by how close you were standing to each other. After making sure ben was alright you made sure harry was too.

(instead of flirting with jane he flirts with you)

"Well well well, thank you for trying to protect me there darling." The hook was under you chin this time.

"No problem pretty boy." You smirk back.

Ben had his little freak out. Jay and carlos had one too for slightly different reasons.

"when did this happen? you and hook?"

You just shrugged and started walking off.

The boys just looked at eachother thouroghly confused.

-After everyone reuniting and you secretely updating evie on the harry situation you all made your way to fairy cottage. When you found chad you had to half hide in harrys shoulder to hide your laughter because god was it good to see chad taken down a few pecks like that.

-Then Mal dropped the bomb. Closing the barrier forever. You couldnt believe it. You were always a firm believer in the vk programm. And you had honestly hoped that even if harry etc were send back, they would get out someday, or you might go visit them. You considered them freinds at that point. But now that wasnt possible.  You tried to comfort harry and uma in some way but it was to no avail.

"Im so sorry you guys... I didnt know." You had tears in your eyes yourself.

"Dont worry about it Darling. Its nae your fault." Placing his hand, his actual hand, on your cheek for a second, to wipe away the tear that had fallen. Before he walked of with uma.

"Harry....."

Mal was shocked to see your tears at the fact that harry was leaving. she had absolutely no idea this was a thing. It wasnt really. you didnt have enough time for it to actually become a thing. You watched harry and uma leave before evie walked up to you to hug you. 

She talked to mal but you didnt want to listen.

suddenly there was a bright light before it went dark for a bit. When you came to again, Mal was gone. It didnt take you guys long to piece together what must have happened. so you went to find mal.

-You and harry were both incredibly relieved to see that the other was okay. *cue big hug and an almost kiss that turned into a kind of awkward cheek kiss before another hug * 

-Harry announcing that he is actually going back to the isle felt like another punch in the gut. Again that sounds dumb considereing how little you actually knew each other but you didnt care. 

-Harry and you talked before he left. He gave you one of his rings "so you wont forget me darling". So you give him one of yours "then dont you forget me either". *cue more crying and hugs, between all of you *

-Mal announcing that the barrier will be taken down during the engagement party was the best thing that couldve happened to you at that point.

"Looks like you get a chance with your pretty boy after all." Evie.

Uma to harry on the isle: "Now you can get your pretty girl, pretty boy." While bumbing his shoulder.

As soon as you could spot eachother on the bridge you ran into each others arms.

-Kith

-like a lot of em

-Your friends from both sides were incredibly happy for both of you.

[ice-cream-writes-stuff]

Who Framed Wally Darling?~☆

《A detective is the only hope to prove the one accused their innocence when they are convicted of murder.》

《Warnings: the subject matter this ARG has are potentially disturbing. DEAD DOVE DO NOT EAT. Welcome Home was created by Clown @ partycoffin 》

-《This Au is going to go two ways.. Enjoy!》

[Cast, You as Eddie Valiant. Wally Darling as Jessica Rabbit and Roger Rabbit!]

All you wanted was to have one big easy paying job. Not helps a puppet on the run.

But... It was your fault.

You were the only one that could prove Wally Darlings' innocence.

You were paid to keep an eye on the star puppet of the hit show. "Welcome Home".

Known for his charm, charisma and soft voice.

The man that hired you, (the boss of the studio that produced Welcome Home.) Wanted to find some dirt on the rising star puppet, believing the puppet had other, side-jobs that he couldn't do due to his contract.

So, you went to investigate.

But after watching him for a couples of day, you were glad to say you had nothing close to what your employer wanted...

So on that note, you went back to the studio and got your pay and headed back home.

[Breaking News: Studio owner of ---- ----, has been murdered! Suspect of the crime has yet to be caught or questioned by authorities.]

Spitting out your breakfast onto the kitchen counter.

You hear a knock on your door.

Opening it up, you see a small frightened puppet on your doorstep

I guess a new case is needed to be solved.

[Cast! You as Roger Rabbit, Wally playing as Jessica Rabbit. Julie and Frank playing Eddie Valiant!]

[I made this for shits and giggles, then I remembered Abba-]

You were a children's show actor, one of the main characters. But not the most prominent one.

You loved to make your audience laugh and learn about the world. Hoping to educate the new generation of young minds.

But others would rather see you fail than succeed.

Your boss had called you down to his office to talk to you, so filming was put on pause as you made your way down to his office.

"(L/N), this is Detective Frankly and Detective Julie, they has something to show you." You nod your head politely to the Detective Frankly and Julie.

After finding out your husband could possibly be cheating on you. You sob and cry, finding a peice of paper and writing down the love you held for Wally before heading home.

Crying softly and sleeping in another room, not wanting to see him. (He was very upset when he noticed you weren't beside him when he woke up.)

On your way to the studio, a news advertisement plays

[Breaking News: Studio owner of ---- ----, has been murdered! Suspect of the crime has yet to be caught or questioned by authorities.]

A photo of you appears on screen as you back away in shock!

You had to get to the bottom of this.

There was only one duo that could help you, Frank and Julie's Detective Agency!

<Just imagine all of this is happening because you told Sally about the movie from your world. And she's so invested in it that she decided to adapt it into a theatrical musical production!>

-

@yourmommylol04 @openminded-freak @takenbytheboogieman @apelepikozume @candie-wax @thealreadyunsteadyteddynewspaper @mars-wants-candy @queenofspades403 @hiddencatails @bumbly-bee-13 @sethlainpallatt @jacquelynwinchester

@the-golden-speckle-light @planetary-poison @i-d0nt-3x1st @urmomisaqt420 @shadowlover321

@trumpettay @sugarrush-blush @sl33pyt1r3 @soggys-world @xxblackdementia311xx @coolcat101s @himboextraordinaire @rainingdandelion @pepperspark @sparklyphantom @000-mika

[Hope ya'll enjoyed this! It's a bit rushed but I had fun playing with the concept and I hope you guys can too! I wanna see some red suit wally and Julie and Frank being detectives!]

[romanadvoratrelundar]

ok sorry if this is messy or incoherent i am sick as hell rn but here is the lestat & gabrielle posting i promised. one of the first things in tvl we learn about her is that gabrielle's main coping mechanism is reading books, books which she never teaches her son to read or even to write basic words. as we learn from lestat, the only things he could write confidently by the time he was turned into a vampire were his name, and 'lord jesus christ', both of which he is implied to have learned at the monastary he went to when he was 12. while his mother did pay for him to study there, she never takes into her own hands anything regarding lestat's education or connecting with him through literature, something we know he does come to love in his later life, at least in the form of shakespeare and theatric literature.

what she does provide lestat, like the monastic education, are his guns and his dogs, all of which are associated with the roles men are expected to play. in this way, he is pushed towards not just the role of the provider for the family, but an idealized masculinized role. gabrielle, as we see, connects closer with lestat than the rest of the family, or at the very least, identifies with him, his anger, and she provides him with what could be seen as tools that can enact that anger, and no other coping mechanisms. however, lestat is someone who is fundamentally compassionate to those he feels connected to. this forces him exclusively into the role of provider, even when he no longer has to hunt for it. we see in interview with the vampire how he attempts to care for his father, providing him with lavish gifts and trappings and caring for his every earthly need (despite despising him to the bone). all this is to say, that for gabrielle, lestat acts as an idealized masculine avatar of herself, able to take up masculine roles in the household and engage in masculine forms of behavior which are barred to her in her position as a wife and mother. she projects on him, telling him her fantasies both violent and sexual but never truly sharing the tools which she uses to make an escape from the household. he is an extension of her desire, and she controls what he learns and what he does without ever really investing into him, caring for him. he is a vessel for her desire, someone she speaks to as an adult and a confidant, but not her child.

[kimothepossom]

BG3 spoilers here for sure, I want to make a thought dump about my favourite Purple Wizard.

I am doing like 3rd full playthrough, and it strikes me even more how Gale doesn't know how to receive unconditional help/love. And how he probably never had someone who was genuinely interested with what HE has to say, and not what WIZARD has to say. While I play I always pick the same dialogue options about his condition and item requests and yesterday something occured to me. (And sorry if that was obvious to everyone else, I'm ND and I can't 'read people that well when they emote) Each time I pick the options that are essentialy 'No problem, I will help, no need to elaborate' he makes that very short pause, like he was ready to make a speech about how important it is, or being ready for tons of questions. And then comes my Tav, just like me, ready to help anyone no questions asked. And then he glitches, and need to quickly come up with something to break the pause. Maybe that's why his bow to my kindness felt so... Theatrical? But not in his typical style but more awkward. There's a lot of other small things, like each time you do something (eg. save the boy from the Harpies) he has a small silly anecdote about his life, that he will not continue on if you're not invested in it. The Harpies one is a good example because you can learn about magma Mephit (that I'm sure is the dude from his ressurection quest) and see him so fuckin' invested in the story, and if you don't follow up on that he just kinda cut it short. I don't know, it's probably silly, but I can't stop thinking that he must have fight for any sort of affection from the others and how he must've been shushed down when he was trying to share his stories. How lonely it must have been having a whole world to share and yet no one in the world to listen.

[mamuzzy-creates-stuff]

Hi there ! K, S and V for the rarepair ask game please !!

Hiiiiiiii, thank you for the ask, Hasta~ I go with OrdoMaze :3

K - If available, share a WIP of your ship (fic, art, fanvid, etc., whatever you'd like!). If you don't have a WIP available, feel free to share an idea for a fanwork you'd like to create for them.

I... actually have something angsty in my pocket. xD

Ordo looked up, like a trapped animal, feral and unyielding. Pathetic creature, Maze thought disgusted, Pathetic, pathetic daddy's boy. Daddy's boy was reluctant to hurt him in the presence of Skirata it seems, otherwise his throat would have already been torn out. Maze grabbed Ordo's chin, thick fingers made the Null look at him and he leaned closer to keep his gaze captive as well. "See if your precious daddy will love you after this" he hissed and pressed his lips to Ordo's.

Maze also has a lot of issues.

S - What do you think are their favorite activities to do together?

Maze had to realize eventually that Ordo is not that selfish as he looks. Either Maze chooses places and activities for themselves, like a museum or theatric plays, or going to restaurants because Ordo loves his stomach, or Ordo makes sure that he carefully plans a date for themselves that can make Maze content. It's not because Ordo doesn't have favorite activities (he enjoys cooking and baking), it's just he is so invested in Maze, he starts to adapt to his habits and hobbies, that he naturally starts to getting interested in them. No, he still don't find fiction interesting, nor the dramas, musicals, holomovies Maze is obsessed about, but Maze finds them interesting and that is enough reason for him to get out of his comfort zone. He wants to understand Maze.

On the other hand, Maze is convinced that maybe sex is the only common ground between them.

However Maze is actually allowed to watch Ordo cook their food (they tried to cook together once, kitchen knife ended up in armor that time). Maze is the 'what will happen when we add this?'-type of guys, while Ordo goes 'NO!!! I'M DOING THIS FIRST TIME, NO EXPERIMENTING UNTIL I KNOW HOW SHOULD IT TASTE!!!'-type of rage. Maze finds Ordo extremely cute while does this task with his usualy serious and focused face.

Ordo won't tell Maze that his perfect date is actually is just staying "at home", Maze reading in silence or loud, caressing Ordo's hair while he is napping in his lap.

V - If your ship got married, where would they go on their honeymoon and why?

Ordo is a true mandalorian at heart. If it was for him, they would just say the words, exchange armor pieces and that was it. Maze doesn't want to hear any of this. Their marriage should be something special after all. They need to make memories together!

Ordo doesn't understand the fuss about it, but when Maze states where he wants to go, he follows. Not just follows, he helps in organizing too and he is actually very proud of himself, when Maze is satisfied with the upcoming tours in nature.

Assuming they have enough budget for that I think they would choose something mild-climate planet, like Aldreaan, Chandrila, and similiar planets.

I think they realize here that there is actually something common in them. They both enjoys silent hiking in the nature (Ordo is not fan of dirt though...), doing a little camp for themselves under the stars, sleeping in a tent and falling asleep to the distant sounds of animals. Ordo especially enjoys if he has catch their own meal and doing something tasty out of it on open fire.

[zedxspacess]

My controversial wrestling take tonight is I liked Ospreay v MJF for what it was. Y'all say yall are sickos until its an actual weird/fucked up match up, and for me, I was always morbidly curious at what the hell kind of match their styles clash would create.

This got really long, but tldr; good match that could've used trimming and editing to get the point across.

I'm weirdly invested in a career long rivalry between MJF and Ospreay. I have a VISION, there's so much juicy character/story meat there that I don't think ppl realize (even TK, Ospreay, and Max) but I See It and go in detail in the read more, but that tldr is:

There were def points where the match dragged on, but I didn't notice until like 30-40mins in. Sure, they played to the crowd a bit much and lots of stalling with them rolling on the floor. Both of these guys' previous long matches were aided by the veterans they shared the ring with. So I'd say for a match they called on their own, they did pretty good all things considered--these guys are 28 and 31 years old respectively, like come on. Commentary said it was hot and humid as hell in that arena, so the fact they went that hard for so long is respectable. I also thought they wanted to challenge the idea of "Ospreay can't sell" by making it such a focal point, but imo they over corrected it at times to where it felt less believable the longer he sold the shoulder. If the match was shorter, I think they would've been able to hide it better or Ospreay could've remembered also selling the knee, but it is what it is to make it believable MJF could beat someone as athletic and powerful as Ospreay.

I think the beginning, parts of the middle, and ending wrestling moments were where a lot of the real meat of the story was that got buried in the downsides/all the stalling. I've seen some ppl say the match felt half MJFism, half Ospreayism, and finally a weird mix of both, and I think that's what they were going for: purposefully highlighting their staunch differences, the strengths and weaknesses of their respective styles, then forcing their opponent to dip into the others' style to meet in the middle. It's not just a clash of styles, but and ideological clash of what wrestling can be. Ospreay doing his athletic performance, but MJF being really pragmatic and countering in simple, creative ways. Max then gets too caught up in character, gets cocky, and lets his guard down where Ospreay's skill and power bulldozes him. So it forces Max to wrestle seriously and meet Ospreay on the mat and in athletics, while also forcing Ospreay to understand the way Max wrestles behind the theatrics, psychologically.

Also for Ospreay, its his ongoing story of "am I willing to bring out my darker instincts to win the match?" if MJF is willing to play so blatantly dirty. It's the conundrum with the Tiger Driver, but also with his matches with Kenny Omega and the Dog Pound Steel Cage match where he was pushed to an emotional limit where we saw a viciousness never seen before. I don't think they quite achieved this with Ospreay in AEW yet (minus the Kenny match), but Max as the top heel definitely has the potential to really get Ospreay down to his level in the future.

I overall liked all the highspots, MJF showing he could keep up with Ospreay's athleticism, Max's heelisms are missed, call backs to Cody/AJ Styles, the Ospreay/Ibushi landing on your feet spot. God, and Cole/Ricochet. Which btw, holy shit the connection between MJF-Ospreay tracing back to Max's friend and Ospreay's friend/mentor's legendary match; if we want to get real crazy, tag match between MJF-Cole vs Ospreay-Ricochet could be something.

Idk, I'm embarrassed to say it, but. I'm just personally super intrigued by the concept of Ospreay and MJF clashing--potentially for the rest of their careers--because of what they represent feels so diametrically opposed, they have to be at odds. But the irony in all of it is, at their cores, they are very similar.

I've said it before and I'll say it again: MJF is a pure acting, soliloquy-giving theater kid; Ospreay is the dance/choreography theater kid--which is a shoot, they legit have done those things irl, but it's also their characters. They care so much about story and emotion and performance. They go 100% in their preferred way of doing it and face heat because they do "too much" in their respective ends of the spectrum. As a result, they are so prideful and defensive about their favorite method. Max as a babyface was so extroverted, super loyal friend, outgoing neurodivergent kid and Ospreay's current character as a genuine, kinda dumb but passionate, golden retriever neurodivergent kid have similar energies. Both have the tendency to speak before thinking too. When you look at their heel characters, Max goes out of his way to embody all the spoiled rich kids of Long Island, while Ospreay tried to embody half chav-half spoiled rich kid culture in England. They're similar kids at hearts, it's just one of them had a diet of 90s Best of the Super Jrs+DragonGate, and the other had a diet of NWA territory+Attitude Era, and thus were sent on different paths.

The other main differences are Ospreay always had the United Empire with him who truly trusted him as brothers. When he left Japan, all the fans showered him in love, and arriving in AEW, fans continued that praise and acceptance. While Max never trusted anyone, even when surrounding himself with people. And the moment he did trust and tasted acceptance by fans, it bit him in the ass, got rejected by the fans, and it all only reassured his worst insecurities. Max is doing a lot of projection onto Ospreay for being accepted so easily, for taking his spot as top dog, for what he represents as his ideological opposite, for having it so easy. But Ospreay wears his heart on his sleeve because it wasn't easy for him, just watch the promo he did against Omega before Wrestle Kingdom. That fighting spirit has tempered him where he can handle the blows, he has the support system with him. He lacks the fear that makes MJF take on such an abrasive persona as a defense mechanism. Ospreay's genuine person, charm, outgoing energy is all what MJF could be or secretly wants to be--as seen on his face run--but was rejected. And he cannot stand it.

Personally, I think they should kiss fight forever about all of this.

[justforbooks]

Eleanor Coppola

Chronicler of the making of her husband’s Apocalypse Now whose footage and recordings were the basis for a documentary and book

In March 1976, Eleanor Coppola arrived in the Philippines, her three young children in tow, to film behind-the-scenes footage on the set of her husband Francis Ford Coppola’s new movie Apocalypse Now, which transposed the plot of Joseph Conrad’s 1899 novella Heart of Darkness to late-1960s Vietnam.

No one could have known then that production on this war epic would stretch on for more than a year, delayed by catastrophic weather, medical emergencies, military conflict, an incomplete script and plain old creative differences, making it one of the most infamously turbulent shoots in cinema history. As it rumbled on, newspaper headlines plaintively asked: “Apocalypse When?”

Principal photography added up to a staggering 238 days in total. Eleanor, who has died aged 87, was there for every one of them. As well as documenting the chaos as it unfolded, she secretly recorded conversations with Francis for the purposes of her diary.

He can be heard confiding gravely: “The film will not be good … This film is a $20m disaster. Why won’t anyone believe me? I’m thinking of shooting myself … This is one crisis I can’t pull myself out of.” He nicknamed the project “The Idiodyssey”.

The material Eleanor gathered – amounting to 60 hours of film and 40 hours of audio – was put into storage after squabbles over the point of view that her film (originally shot for promotional purposes) should take. Fax Bahr and George Hickenlooper’s documentary Hearts of Darkness: A Filmmaker’s Apocalypse (1991) later drew heavily on her extraordinary footage and tape recordings. Highlights included Francis frantically typing new scenes moments before shooting; arguing with Dennis Hopper, who had not learned his lines; and conferring at length with Marlon Brando, who arrived on set hugely overweight, not having read Heart of Darkness and seemingly intent on dragging his heels in the hope of reaping multimillion-dollar overtime bonuses.

Hearts of Darkness showed belatedly that Eleanor was not merely an observer on set, but also a facilitator. It was she, for instance, who convinced Francis to watch the sacrificial culling of a carabao, a water buffalo, by the Ifugao tribespeople, a gruesome spectacle that he eventually incorporated into his film’s climax.

The documentary was also narrated by Eleanor, incorporating parts of her book Notes on the Making of Apocalypse Now (1979; updated in 1995). She is heard reflecting that “it’s scary to watch someone you love go into the centre of himself and confront his fears – fear of failure, fear of death, fear of going insane. You have to fail a little, die a little, go insane a little, to come out the other side.”

She was invested in Apocalypse Now in more ways than one: Francis had put up their home as collateral. A fortnight into production, he sacked his lead actor, Harvey Keitel, replacing him with Martin Sheen, who later suffered a near-fatal heart attack.

Actors would turn up to set with no idea what they were shooting; the phrase “scenes unknown” was a regular fixture on the daily call-sheets. Helicopters loaned to the production by Ferdinand Marcos, the country’s strongman president, were abruptly recalled for his war on communism. During a typhoon that destroyed sets and halted filming, Francis cooked pasta and played Puccini’s La Bohème at high volume.

He took what Eleanor later called “an Italian approach” to life: “Very theatrical, throwing stuff up in the air and screaming.” Through it all, she was undaunted, even sanguine, no matter how high the stakes. “What’s the worst that can happen?” she asks in Hearts of Darkness, looking back on the mounting threats to the family’s home and finances. “They take away your big house, they take away your car, so what? … I really wasn’t frightened by it.”

Born in Los Angeles, California, she was raised in Huntington Beach by her mother, Delphine (nee Lougheed); her father, Clifford Neil, a political cartoonist for the Los Angeles Examiner, died when Eleanor was 10. She was educated at Huntington Beach high school, and graduated from UCLA in 1959 with a degree in applied design, going on to do freelance work at architectural installations.

Eleanor and Francis met in Ireland in 1962 on the set of the Roger Corman-produced horror film Dementia 13, which Francis directed; Eleanor was the assistant art director. They married a year later and had three children: Gian-Carlo, who died in a speedboat accident in 1986 at the age of 22; and Roman and Sofia, who both became film-makers.

In 1971, Francis rushed from the set of The Godfather to film Eleanor giving birth to Sofia. Eleanor later used the footage as part of an art installation. She also created an artwork in response to Gian-Carlo’s death, Circle of Memory, a chamber of straw bales that she installed in several sites over the years.

Even after the children were born, it was rare for the family not to leave its Napa Valley estate (which the Coppolas had bought after the success in 1972 of The Godfather) to accompany Francis wherever he happened to be working. After the Philippines, Eleanor and the children moved to Los Angeles to be with him during production on his musical One from the Heart (1982). They then decamped to Tulsa, Oklahoma, while he directed his back-to-back teen movies The Outsiders and Rumble Fish (both 1983). On the set of The Godfather Part III (1990), Eleanor recalled how Francis claimed to “[hate] the process of making movies … he talked about his family and complained about me. I sat there while he ran it all out, not agreeing, and not yielding to the temptation to give my point of view. I just tried to be present and listen.”

Nevertheless, Eleanor confessed in her 2008 memoir Notes on a Life that she sometimes regretted not having pursued fully her own artistic ambitions. In 2023, she told the New Yorker that Francis “made it very clear that my role was to be the wife and mother”.

The Coppolas’ wine and hotel businesses occupied some of her time in later life. She also returned to textiles, one of her great passions, as well as designing costumes for the dance company ODC San Francisco.

She directed two narrative films – Paris Can Wait (2016), starring Diane Lane and Alec Baldwin, and Love is Love is Love (2020), with Rosanna Arquette and Cybill Shepherd – and filmed documentary footage on the set of some of Sofia’s movies, including the irreverent costume drama Marie Antoinette (2006). Sofia dedicated her most recent film, Priscilla (2023), to her mother.

Eleanor is survived by Francis, Roman and Sofia, six grandchildren, Gia, Romy, Cosima, Alessandro, Marcello and Pascal, and a brother, William.

🔔 Eleanor Jessie Coppola, writer and film-maker, born 4 May 1936; died 12 April 2024

Daily inspiration. Discover more photos at Just for Books…?

[ilikethisacompletelynormalamount]

New interview with Simon Stephens and Andrew Scott on their upcoming play Vanya, from The Financial Times

“We must declare point-blank that nobody can make head or tail of anything in this world,” wrote Anton Chekhov in a letter in 1888. Rarely is that better expressed than in Uncle Vanya, his humane masterpiece, published 10 years later, a play about a bunch of disconsolate souls rattling around a Russian country estate. Forced to stop their daily routine by the arrival of a demanding guest, they drift, doze, drink, take a look at their lives and are dismayed by what they see.

Many of them feel sorry for themselves, particularly Vanya, who at 47 is undergoing a midlife crisis of epic proportions. Yet as actor Andrew Scott observes, in the hands of Chekhov, they become not only painfully recognisable and funny, but quite heartbreaking.

“It’s funny because life is funny and there’s no tragedy if there’s no comedy,” says Scott, who is known to many for his “hot priest” in Phoebe Waller-Bridge’s Fleabag, and for superb stage performances as Hamlet and as Garry Essendine in Present Laughter. “Chekhov has such enormous compassion for people. He was a doctor and he saw how people were. I think that’s why it’s so moving.”

Scott should know. He’s about to play every one of the characters in Vanya, a striking new version by Simon Stephens. Here, the actor will play not only the protagonist but also his gentle niece Sonya, weary doctor Astrov, the pompous visiting academic and everybody else rambling about the estate in the sweltering late-summer heat.

Andrew Scott in rehearsals for ‘Vanya’, in which he plays all the roles © Marc Brenner

So, I ask the writer and actor when we meet one morning before rehearsals, why is this? Could they not afford an ensemble? “I have a very bad reputation . . . ” jokes Scott, deadpan — to Stephens’ delight — before the two explain that the idea is to honour the radical impulse of Chekhov’s drama.

“I think one of the great ironies is that sometimes when you say ‘Chekhov’, people say, ‘Oh my God, is it very serious?’” says Scott. “But it’s the opposite: it’s completely human and wonderful and light as the air. And radical. He broke the form. Characters talk to the audience; they forget what they’re saying. So how do you catch that radical spirit?”

To which Stephens adds: “If you look at photographs of Chekhov, he’s funny, he’s sexy, he’s got a little twinkle in his eye. He’s not a figure from a museum.”

Chekhov chafed against the melodramatic theatrical norms of his day. “In life, people do not shoot themselves or hang themselves or fall in love, or deliver themselves of clever sayings every minute,” the playwright complained. “They spend most of their time eating, drinking, running after women or men, talking nonsense.” In his plays, one character’s heart might be breaking as everyone else witters on about the weather.

This new version heightens that poignant paradox, says Scott: it responds to Chekhov’s formal innovation by highlighting the fact that the characters, all caught up in their own problems, are far more similar than they realise.

“Usually, in the rehearsal process, you’re in charge of one character and you defend them,” he says. “This is like looking after all these people and not judging them. I have to invest in them all . . . And so much of what they are talking about — they have exactly the same wants and needs.

You play the lightness because the darkness will play itself’

“When it’s just one person [playing all the parts], you think, ‘Come on, what are you doing? This is pointless.’ And at the end, what does it matter? What are these tiny little things that we obsess about? So it squeezes out the absurdity of our preoccupations as human beings. It highlights and distils the comedy of it.”

Many recent Chekhov productions have shrugged off period detail to draw out the plays’ topicalities. But for Stephens, the genius of Chekhov’s work was that by showing humdrum life on stage, he touched on something more fundamental.

“You could say that Vanya is a great play about the cost-of-living crisis or the environment,” says Stephens. “You hear Astrov talking about the inability of humans to rise to the challenges of living in an eroding world and it feels as though it’s written this week. But for me, what’s compelling are the deeper truths about how you fall in love, how you live when you know you’re dying, how you make sense of the life that’s not been what you hoped it would be. I think there’s a timelessness to that interrogation.”

Scott and Stephens have worked together several times, and there’s a clear sympathy and ease between them. Stephens, flung over a chair, rangy and ebullient; Scott coiled up on his seat, quietly mischievous. Stephens wrote the 2008 monologue Sea Wall for Scott, an intensely moving portrayal of grief. Key to its success was their mutual ability to combine emotional honesty with lightness of touch. As Scott puts it: “You play the lightness because the darkness will play itself.”

But they also share — together with Sam Yates, director of Vanya — an instinct to experiment with form. “Theatre is the lie that tells the truth,” says Scott. “Everybody sits there, knowing that those people [on stage] are pretending to be someone else. So why not acknowledge that in some way?”

In Sea Wall, Scott wandered the stage as the audience came in, then slipped into conversation with them, making the shift from actor to character hard to pinpoint. It was an approach that invited the audience to work with him in imagining the characters of the story.

Vanya builds on that. Walking through the rehearsal room, I notice props scattered about — a bunch of roses, a bottle of vodka, a kettle. The piece will be theatrical, Scott says — “You want to be able to create the world” — and Stephens’ version, though distilled, retains the dialogue. But again, the audience will play a key role in imagining the characters.

“You need them,” says Scott. “They’re your collaborators. If the audience are alert to something, their perspective on you changes. So it’s genuinely honouring the audience’s intelligence.”

He recalls experiencing this alchemy in action while playing twin brothers in Christopher Shinn’s Dying City in 2006. At one point he had to transform from one brother to the other on stage. “I remember during previews I was trying all sorts of different things. Then I thought, ‘I’m not going to do anything, at all. I’m just going to sit there.’ And people said to me, ‘I saw you change from one person to another.’ But it was absolutely an illusion.”

Stephens hopes this approach will build on the drama’s empathy, encouraging audiences to find common ground with all the characters — and with one another. In Chekhov’s final version of the play, Vanya and Sonya return to their labours in a climactic scene that contains both solace and aching sadness. His characters may despair, but they keep on keeping on. For Stephens, there’s great beauty and humanity in that honesty.

“I think it’s a profoundly optimistic play,” he says. “For me, making this with Andrew, having watched Hamlet, I think this is Chekhov’s answer to the question ‘to be, or not to be?’ And Chekhov’s saying, ‘You fucking be. I’ve seen people die by the score.’ I think the speech with which Sonya ends this play is the most beautiful articulation of the dignity of continuing to live in the face of [mortality] that I’ve come across in any literary form.”

‘Vanya’, Richmond Theatre, London, August 28-September 2; Duke of York’s Theatre, London, September 15-October 21. vanyaonstage.com

[tyrantisterror]

One thing that’s interesting when comparing Beast Wars to G1 Transformers is how often the later gets wildly reinterpreted in adaptation while the former stays relatively the same.

The G1 characters and conflict have been adapted so many times.  There are dozens of Optimus Primes and Megatrons and Starscreams and Shockwaves and Soundwaves and so fucking many Bumblebees, so many iterations of the Autobots vs. Decepticons, and either out of necessity or sheer creative boredom there have been some wild reinterpretations of them as a result, sometimes even from the same writer.  One of my favorite examples is Ultra Magnus, who in the Marvel comics was written as a very uncertain character who constantly second guessed himself and his ability to lead, but in the IDW comics was written to be this hard-lined rules-obsessed character who was always certain what he was doing was right, specifically because Simon Furman, a writer for both comics, wanted to keep from repeating himself and decided to invert Magnus’s characterization to force different stories out of him.

G1 has a ridiculously huge cast of toys characters to pick and choose from, and because of all these adaptations, almost all of them have juicy personalities and character arcs to play with.  You’ve got the A-Listers, of course, but even z-listers like Ironfist and Swerve have at least one story where they get to shine.

Beast Wars, by contrast, is almost always focused on the original main cast when it’s brought back.  Beast Megatron, Optimus Primal, Dinobot, Cheetor, etc.  Where G1 adaptations will play with new settings and conflict wrinkles (Animated puts it in the somewhat distant future, the Unicron Trilogy really emphasizes the Cosmic Horror of Unicron, etc.), Beast Wars always (with one exception) takes place on prehistoric Earth.

And I theorize this is because of the different between their first cartoons.  Both are character focused - because the whole point of a toyline-based cartoon is to get kids emotionally invested in the toys their buying, and you do that by making those toys interesting characters - but because 90′s CGI animation was a SHITLOAD more expensive than 80′s traditional animation, G1 Transformers could make the cast ENORMOUS while Beast Wars had to kill off a cast member before they could afford to bring another on, and as such the cast remained pretty damn small - which in turn meant that those characters were even more focused on, given more development, and defined in a depth that the original cartoon iterations of the G1 cast weren’t.  G1 Megatron is a defined character, yes, but that definition is loose enough that he can be wildly reinterpreted while still feeling like Megatron.  Beast Wars Megatron, though, is cemented.  He must be a schemer, he must be theatrical, he must be gleefully beyond redemption yet still charming as hell.  The characterizations and plot twists of Beast Wars are so iconic that they almost loom too large, with re-adaptations often ending up feeling like just pale imitations of the original.

Except Beast Wars Uprising, which is creative as Hell and it’s kind of a shame that the only way to read it requires you to look at an eye-searing website.

Anyway, it’s kind of fun to think of how Beast Wars could be reinterpreted.  It technically has a huge cast like G1 - there were SO many Beast Wars toys, which means there are a lot more characters than those in the original show, and as the recent-ish IDW comics show, nothing’s to stop you from adding new characters to the mix (I mean, they only added two and still stuck to a lot of the same beats as the cartoon, but still).  You could do some big shakeups.

And hell, even among that core cast, there are characters that could use some more love.  Tigatron and Airrazor got screwed by Hasbro’s requiring new toys on the screen, their arcs cut abruptly short to make way for new product.  Terrorsaur and Scorponok were similarly eliminated but also had the problem of never really defining themselves in an interesting way, they could do with entirely new characterizations.  And as Beast Wars Uprising showed, there’s  a LOT of potential in Transmutate, a character written to die in her debut episode.

Here’s hoping 90′s nostalgia will do for Beast Wars what decades of 80′s nostalgia have done for the G1 cast.  I think it’d be fun to see the franchise get weird with these beasts.

[neverlandlavander]

Bravi, bravi, bravissimi!

A re-write of "All the world's a stage" from Licht's pov.

Tw: blood and injury

Once again, that one question came into an interview. Apparently, it was more intriguing that he was a young person who doesn't "acts according to his age", than him being able to make people cry by playing piano.

Despites not being very invested in meeting new people, it is not like he's avoiding them, nor like he's unable to do that if he wanted so, things just happened that way. On the path he chose to follow at a very young age, giving up a typical youth was the price to pay, meeting new people isn't impossible but also it is not that simple.

And for Licht, friendship was meant to be keept as a duty. Even if you're fine on your own, once someone comes into your life, it changes completely. He learned from his favorite book when he was still a kid, the only thing he actually understood from that by the time, "you become responsible, forever, for what you have tamed".

He was better without them. It was easier.

But then he was fooled. He was laugthed at, and mocked by showing his true self. All he wanted was to make that demon who trapped him pay for his sins.

Now, holding up said demon he named Hyde, who was curled up on his lap as a harmless animal, for what he fears to be the first and the last time, Licht rewinds all of that again. As he saw beyond the annoying grin on the servamp's face, the theatrical mask, growing up Licht's hate even more, because he thought no one cared about him and what he did, but Licht does. And because he cared so deeply about that demon that they ended up on each other's throats countlesly.

For sometime, after losing his first friend, Licht didn't want to befriends with anybody else, even Krantz had to conquer his space on the angel's life. Then he met Hyde and once again the world expanded a little.

He was annoyed of him because the vampire wouldn't admit to be in pain, they fought because Licht wouldn't give up while he thinks he was worth to save. He wouldn't have waste his time on him if he didn't think so, he cared about it because he understand, and he believed that Hyde could also understand him, and they could be a part of each other, sharing a new meaning to their own regrets and reasons why it wasn't completely worthless.

He was right. Unfortunally it didn't happen in time for Hyde to starts a new life by his side. Even though any rational person would think that he got what he deservers, the curtain had to fall in front of his eyes just before he gets the chance to try to make his actions a little less meaningless and rescue it from the desolate cruelty of emptiness.

The metamorph changes again to his human form on Licht's trembled hands.

"Licht" It sounds with difficulty as the blood come to his throat. Licht's eyes with a thin glow, revealing that he's scared or sad or a mix of it, that someone who's not used to his expressions of emotions would've miss. Their eyes come across each other, in silence for a while.

"Thank you..." The vampire continues, till the growing pain within his chest turns too much. "I'm sor-" A cough stops him to finish, but Licht guesses where he has heard that line before, and despair grows in his eyes.

Licht holds the vampire urgently preventing his fall and pulls him to lay his head on the eve's shoulder, still without saying a word. For the next seconds all that can be heard is the headgehog's unstoppable coughing. In a moment of coldness, the back of Hyde's head was pulled to lead his mouth against Licht's neck exposed skin.

"Drink it." The order was attended, with a hope of working well. Both heads thinking the same, as the eve releases one last attempt to help its damaged servamp.

Thankfully, it seems like they did it. Licht exales, feeling a little bit rest, when he hears a sleeping sound from the vampire, now back to its animal form on the angel's lap.

"Don't you dare." Licht thinks, staring at the sleeping hedgehog as it was the last chance he would have to. "You have no right to get out of my life like this, not after everything."

Not after he got to know Hyde, and let him know him. He didn't ask for Hyde, but now that he gets him, he wouldn't let him die. Not the newest most loyal listener of his piano, the one who set on the first chair, nearest to him, and left the music change his mind, took the angel's life work and got it a new matter, transforming it and both of them, even if just thanks to what he has sufer and made sufer.

[waheelawhisperer]

Hmm, Doc Heely questions: (1) this guy have any particular weapon preferences? (2) what sort of enemies has he made by the time best horse & crocnurse start working out their triad (or however many that turns out)? and...damn, what else...(3) is Lappy territorial about whatever they have or just Generally Lappy?

Contains spoilers for Arknights story events under the readmore.

Given that his preferred assassination method in the past was decapitation, he's very fond of anything with bladed edges, particularly swords and knives. Kal'tsit tries very hard to keep him away from bladed weapons for this reason and nearly has an aneurysm when Texas and Lappland let him try out their swords.

His enemies are... mainly just the standard canon ones, I guess, with the addition of Kal'tsit as his sitcom archnemesis? He's also Tomimi's mortal foe because Gavial pays too much attention to him.

Jk I lied he also hates Italians because he thinks the famiglie are a bunch of worthless thugs and absolutely despises the way the Signori Dei Lupi play bullshit power games using people as disposable pawns. Doctor Waheela has very firm ideas about the responsibility of those with power to protect and uplift those without, and the famiglie... do the exact opposite of that, so he thinks they're a bunch of losers who only know how to prey on the weak and butcher each other over their share of the sheep. He's very focused on efficiency and all his assassinations and plans and machinations are very no-frills, no-nonsense, no-theatrics, except as necessary to complete the contract or his personal objectives (e.g. leaving the decapitated corpse of a king sitting on his own throne is very dramatic, but it accomplishes something by reminding his court that no one is safe from the Saberwolf of the Headless Valley, so they'd better toe the line), so he thinks all the posturing and such the famiglie and their wise guys engage in is pointless petty bullshit and holds them in contempt because of it.

He was actually involved with the relocation of some of the families to Columbia (not the one who started it, though. Basically, Salvatore Texas got in contact with him and proposed the move and, as someone roughly affiliated with Columbia, he supported it enthusiastically and basically ran interference* with the Signori Dei Lupi while Salvatore and the other families that immigrated to Columbia made the transition). He tried teaching them his assassin wisdom but they learned the wrong lessons from it and it pissed him off so much he left Columbia for Victoria for a bit. He was trying to get them to be more efficient in terms of combat and operations and such and abandon all the egotistical posturing and grandstanding that characterizes the Siracusan mafia and instead they were just like "focus exclusively on profit, got it" so he just facepalmed and left before he got pissed off and killed them all. I think the moment where Salvatore was murdered by his son was the point where he just said "fuck this, you people are unsalvageable" and decided to relocate. He feels a bit guilty about this because if he'd still been around the liquidation of the Texas family would've gone differently (Signora Sicilia would've been forced to come herself instead of just sending the famiglie on her behalf and Texas never would've had to make her deal with Zaaro/Famiglia Bellone. He couldn't have stopped the liquidation entirely on his own, but he absolutely could've gotten Texas out), and also because he later sees how badly Siracusa fucked up Texas and especially Lappland and that's something he could have and would have protected them from if he'd known.

I'm playing around with the timeline a bit here but he's also not at all a fan of the Victorian nobility as a whole and has spent a lot of time in conflict with them for one reason or another. The reason he went to Victoria was to check in on the Aslan royal dynasty because he's invested a lot into them as a counterbalance to the nobility, but then he learned that the Aslan royal family had all been slaughtered, which came on the heels of his disappointment with the Columbian famiglie and all this together frustrated him so much that he decided to a) become a doctor/scientist instead of an assassin and b) fuck off to the middle of nowhere to sulk and write papers. If he'd been thinking a bit more clearly, he could've found and raised Siege, and I'm not sure if that would have made things better or worse.

For the third question, the answer is a bit of both? Lappy's being a bit of a shit because she's Lappy but she's also genuinely close friends with Doctor Waheela and gets very protective of him as a result. She doesn't necessarily get jealous of new additions to... whatever they've got going on unless she feels like she's not getting enough attention (her response is usually "oh hell yes a new friend/[boy/girl]friend/target to annoy this rules), but she watches anyone close to him like a hawk because he's fragile, relatively speaking, and she refuses to risk someone who helped her along the healing process the way he did. Lappy doesn't have a lot of people she's close to, and she does not particularly care to lose the ones she's got.

(Fun fact this actually led to Texas and Lappland giving Nearl the "if you ever hurt him" speech, which backfired completely because Margie got offended by the thought that she would ever do that in the first place and ended up guilt-tripping both of them into apologizing)

*He kicked their asses and made them eat shitty knockoff French versions of Italian food and told them that if they ever set foot in his territory again he'd make them eat more of it, just one of the many reasons they hate and fear him in equal measure

[florasletter]

i am gonna rant, tomorrow is the oscars, i need to say something ive been wanting to say for a while

any fucking filmmaker that makes drama/comedy (taika, gunn, greta, etc) movies would make barbie, its easy marketing, hoards of money, its a low risk investiment since its a popular, PG 13 movie, colorfull, appealing for everyone, has all the IP to make money, WB is thirsty for good press and is swimming on money, they will give its full support, its a story everyone knows for 60 years of a ficctional character or a doll the whole world knows. i like barbie it was a good movie. greta did a wonderful job for what was giver her. period.

now tell me

a book about a historical controversial figure, boring ass talks abt nuclear war, ww2, communism and cold war, phsysics stuff, relased in 2006 and won a pulitzer prize.

no director dared to make a movie abt it. very high risk, why?

the pandemic and its inflation and new habits of consumption post super hero (very saturated) cinema era in an era quick shitty streaming movies bc they dont need theatrical release, little effort, just pump movies out, no control wheater is good or not no one (as many would think) would want a 3 hour movie, with heavy dialogue (bc it needs it to tell the story properly) with many black and white scenes, Rated R, nudity and s3xual representation scenes about this historical controversial figure. tiktok and reels era, most people are obssessed with a 30 seconds videos in their hands, keeping a very bad habit of zero attention span and quick serotonin, unable to enjoy the development of a full story that is longer than 30 without a pop music playing on the background can't go around marketing the movie like its super fun and colorfull for the entire family ahah cool, lets make it a competition like ahaha BARBIEMHEIMER ahah so fun lol why dont they get into it too? it would help their marketing bc lol who wanna watcha 3 hour R rated movie abt a physicist lmao get real!!! No buddy, you wanna scrutinize what happened the people of japan? this guy was scrutinized by its own country after everything he was asked to do? no, you cant market it like that, its harder, but thankfully the ppl making the movie ARE THE MARKETING. also the ppl saying "who cares abt nuclear war lmao, it wont happen" guess who just did a speech abt it the other day abt using them?? i am not gonna say his name yall know who it is. now invest 100mi on a movie like this. didnt see all the others directors around rushing to make a movie abt oppenheimer like chris did, he thought it was very interesting and passionate abt it, he had a vision for it, to contextualize yall: he has been wanting to make something biographical for years (will we ever see his howard hugues movie? thanks martin for doing it first??? will chris ever recover from this? poor bby). and ffs this movie didnt even use that much computer VFX, so much amazing pratical effects it didnt even an oscar nom for it, any other director could have done with the computer technology from 10 years ago. buddy literally asked for black and white imax films, no one did this before. buddy dark knight came out 16 years ago, the first movie shot in imax, back then there was 4 or 3 cameras in the world and this idiot i love even managed to break one of them during the shooting (see the behind the scenes of dark knight its amazing and hilarious). what other filmmaker is going this far for a biography? they could have made this movie but

they didnt make it. period.

i am not here to say that this is better than every other movie, oppenheimer should be forever praised (it is not in my sincere opinion chris' best movie, neither my fav of his) but this is for the ppl whining abt barbie and putting oppenheimer against it.

the reels i saw the other day "greta could make oppeneimer, but nolan couldnt make barbie" HONEY... WHAT DO I DO WITH THIS INFO? IS THIS SUPPOSED TO ME HER LOOK GOOD ? you are not helping her at all... if she can make oppenheimer why didnt she make it before? is it bc it would be hard to pitch? it wouldnt be easy to make money from it or get funded? it would just be another oscar winning box office flop? bc lets be real, many amazing oscar movies i love, they were commercial flops, and its ok, BUT YOU SEE IT RIGHT?

marvels endgame was a huge commercial movie and a great box office, no one here is screaming the russos to get noms

"ah its a groundbreaking movie bc of feminism"

honey please there's more groundbreaking movies better than barbie, are you fucking kidding me. this is the stuff that makes me ashamed of saying i am a feminist.

also who cares abt margot, isnt it abt to be feminism or is it white feminism ? i wanna see support for lilly gladstone who did and insane work in KOTFM than emma stone in PT.

i am biased, i am his fan afterall, i have no hate for the others, but i am a realist. chris has been making movies for 20 years, groundbreaking breathtaking beautiful stuff, i am not here to throw the party like "visionary director" but i wanna put things on the table, he has been way past what the academy considers cinema, he has been snubbed for so long it became ridiculous. he has been doing an imppecable work of supporting filmmaking and the theater industry, supporting the craftsmanship of filmmaking the studios' inverstors and companies look down on just for profits. to end my rant now, the last thing i wanna say is: i don't care if yall say "ah just another cis het white man winning/being nominated" yes honey, it is.

if anything, this is the "cis het white man" who you just can't believe has not won yet. insane right? he has been snubbed by other cis het white males who would believe it right? lmao

now i am done.

we take in the sheets tomorrow evening. have a great saturday yall

[sansxfuckyou]

Nat Twenty!

Summary: The boys play DnD and Kyle and Kenny get a little bit too invested in their characters story lines (even letting them parallel reality a bit).

Warnings: blood, angst, check Ao3 port for full tags

Authors Note: *wakes up at seven AM* first day of school wish me luck. Day fives prompt was domestic/star-crossed lovers, I went with star-crossed lovers and I hope I did it good with a partial Stick of Truth AU.anyways! if you enjoyed maybe consider dropping a reblog or checking out the Ao3 port

"You fucking idiot!" Kyle exclaimed, clutching the gaping wound on his side as he watched his last teammate prep her attack.

Kenny simply turned to face him, "If I don't get lucky this is gonna kill me too."

"Don't," The word came out torn and breathless, pleading and begging.

"I love you," Were the princesses final words before she called her unicorn and all Kyle could do was watch in terror.

-/-/-/-

"Roll the die," Cartman said lazily as Kenny snatched two D10's and shook them in his hands.

"What's with all the theatrics anyways? Getting awfully mushy," Stan accused.

"Hey man, we just want the story to be a story, and sometimes stories require a bit of passion," Kyle defended with as Kenny rolled the die.

He added the numbers silently, "Thirteen, do I succeed?"

Cartman glanced over his rule book, "Princess Kenny's unicorn stampede is successful, dealing a total of," He input some numbers on a calculator, "Do you have any frost elements equipped?"

Kenny shook his head.

"It deals two thousand damage rounded down because of your shit decision to not equip frost," Cartman said.

"Does it kill?" Kenny asked.

Cartman nodded, "It maims, absolutely fucking slaughters, it's epic."

-/-/-/-

The unicorn easily tramples the orc ahead of them, leaving it in naught but a pulp of dropped items and flesh. A mix of shock and euphoria wash over Kyle as he rushes over to the best of his ability, still keeping pressure on the wound.

"Holy fuck it worked," Kyle spoke quietly as he stumbles over to the corpse where Princess Kenny is standing, looting her enemies corpse like a scavenger vulture.

Quite frankly, Kyle finds it hot.

What's not to love about a women covered in blood and viscera in a freshly killed body? And she's taller than him, by a very considerable margin. Tall enough and strong enough to bench press him.

Kyle still cannot believe he gets a chance to be on the field with her.

Kenny handed him a bag of cheesy puffs, "You're health is low."

Kyle gladly took a handful, "Thanks, you almost done with the corpse?"

"Yep, we should get going before the grand wizard gets worried," Kenny said, holding a hand that Kyle gladly took.

-/-/-/-

"I would not be worried!" Cartman snapped, Kyle only smirked.

"You would be so fucking worried if the princess was out on a mission with High Jew Elf Kyle for too long," Kyle said smoothly, "Wouldn't you be worried she's macking with me?"

"Please, Princess Kenny would never suck face with High Jew Elf Kyle," Stan countered with.

"Wanna roll to find out?" Kyle spat defensively.

Stan scoffed as he reached for a green D20, "Sure, if you roll higher then me than Princess Kenny is absolutely kissing you."

"Don't I get a say in this?" Kenny asked.

"You can roll too," Kyle offered, handing over a blue and red D20 as he reached for his own black D20.

"I doubt this is legal," Cartman said calmly, doing little to stop them as they rolled.

"Fifteen," Stan said.

"Seventeen," Kenny said.

"Nat twenty!" Kyle exclaimed, slamming a hand on the table as he did so, grinning smugly.

Cartman rolled his eyes, "Fine."

-/-/-/-

"So, Princess Kenny," Kyle begins as he walks the princess towards Cartmans castle.

"Yes?" Kenny asked, batting her eye lashes as she spoke.

"Would you care to indulge me with a kiss?" Kyle asked gently, he's instantly caught off guard by a hand tugging him down just a bit.

There's a sly smirk on her face before she speaks, "Of course King Kyle."

She easily brings him to down in a second, hand pressed to the small of his back and one of his feet pressed on the ground to try and keep his balance. The other is kicked up as he's dipped like a dancer, like he's the weaker one. Red simply coats his face and he can barely get out a single word as she meets him in a kiss that he moans into.

She pulls back as fast as she meets him and pushes him back to standing. He only stares like an orphan duckling, imprinted on the princesses beauty.

She gives a soft laugh, "Maybe we could do more later."

"What? Not fair," Kyle whined.

"Or we could do nothing," Kenny said.

"Later sounds fine," Kyle quickly rebounded with

-/-/-/-

"Okay, wow, that was some shit descriptions," Kyle said.

"I do not wanna describe you and Kenny making out," Cartman said.

Kyle rolled his eyes, "Fine," He glanced to the clock, "I gotta be home soon anyways."

"Me too," Kenny said as he stood up, "Same time tomorrow?"

Stan nodded, "I'll be back, I think those new dice are getting stocked at the store."

"Alright, I'll buy some," Cartman said as he started to pack up the die so they wouldn't roll away, "See you tomorrow guys."

-/-/-/-

Kyle simply couldn't fall asleep, stuck on the fact that he actually rolled a twenty to kiss Kenny. In game of course! But that'd be enough to satiate his desperate brain for months on end. He glanced to his digital clock, bright red letters reading eleven PM. He gave a groan of annoyance as he flipped onto his stomach and reached for his phone.

He lazily typed a message to Kenny, a 'u up?' answered with a 'yeah, cant sleep?'

Kyle gave a humming laugh and he smiled a bit, 'obviously' he typed back.

'mood' was Kennys response, before Kyle could answer he sent another message, 'wanna work on our characters story?'

Kyles heart skips a beat, 'like, working after the kiss, or?'

'after the kiss' Kenny typed back, 'i think itd be fun'

'cool. Cool. Want me to start?' Kyle asked.

'sure' came Kennys answer.

-/-/-/-

Kyle cleared his throat hesitantly as the princess took a seat across him from. She held a muted expression, to the point that Kyle had a hard time deciphering it even though he could usually do so.

"Princess Kenny," Kyle began nervously, "I'd like to talk about what happened after our duel with the orc."

"What about it?" Kenny said calmly as she drummed her fingers along the tables edge.

"Nothing much it just, caught me off guard, I was sort of joking you know," Kyle got out, a nervous laugh on his voice as he spoke.

"Bullshit," Kenny stated bluntly, giving Kyle a dismissive glance, "You liked that kiss as much as anyone else I've touched."

Kyle faltered briefly, "Yeah, I did," He pensively looked over his words, "Which is why I propose we start an affair."

"That, that won't work," Kenny said, she sounded tense, "I'm leaving to a foreign, far off region."

"Oh," Kyle got out quietly, eyes already glossy, "I see."

"I'm sorry King Kyle, you are amazing and I would love to be even in a public relationship with you," Kenny said, "But I'm afraid it can't be arranged."

"What a shame, really," Kyle said, standing up from his seat, "If that's the case then I suppose we should tell the grand wizard king?"

"We probably should, but we don't have too," Kenny said, gliding around the corners of the table to meet Kyle at his side. She placed a hand on top of his, "We really don't."

"I know," Kyle answered with quietly, "I love you, Princess Kenny, I really do."

"I love you too, King Kyle," Princess Kenny got out softly, leaning down just a bit to place a kiss to his cheek.

-/-/-/-

'and scene!' Kyle texts over, in shambles at the notions that he won't get a chance to kiss Kenny again. It came out of left field, Princess Kenny being sent to a foreign kingdom.

And they were just getting to the good part!

'kind of weird to end it with, dont ya think?' Kyle asked, he watched with rapt attention as the text bubble popped up.

'eh, sometimes stories are unfulfilling' Kenny answered with and Kyle felt an ache in heart.

'i guess. Still.' Kyle texted back as he flopped onto his side, drawing up his knees and tugging a pillow to his chest.

'i love you man' came Kennys response.

Kyle froze up.

'love you too' Kyle shot back stiffly.

-/-/-/-

Kenny was on the verge of tears in his bed, he had to tell Kyle, he needed too. He really didn't want to, but he absolutely needed too if he ever wanted to sleep at night again.

He clutched his pillow a little tighter as he put his phone on silent.

'really, i love you Kyle. Like, honestly.' Kenny shot over with a bit of a smile.

The triple dot bubble kept blinking on and off before finally settling on an 'oh god. Oh god. We should talk about this in person.'

He smiled a bit at the answer. Kenny took a shaky breath, he exhaled out a soft 'fucking hell' before typing out the next message. He clicked send and placed his phone screen down on the floor beside his bed and rolling onto his back. He tried to ignore the messages he knew were flooding in response to it.

'Kyle I'm moving to Canada later this month.'

He still couldn't sleep knowing what'd come at school the next day.

[lirotation]

Midnight rant, urg. May have spoilers.

I just finished the game. I am exhausted, but i am so upset that i cannot sleep.

The game itself is very fun, for a dnd fan like me, it is a dream come true. I invested 160+ hours of honest playing, and for what?

Mass effect 3 vibe all over again. What the hell happened to the ending? Not even a classic illustration and narration slideshow? My ending convo with asty was bugged out and skipped. Can you imagine my shock when the game just returned to the main manual like that?

When i finally got it to work(someone had to die), my Astarion, after time and again i told him to be his own person, ended up doing whatever i say. After all we've been through, he still feels insecure about our relationship.

He was so terrified in the upper city i couldn't even have a word with him. I felt bad bringing him with me to the final battle.

They clearly put more effort into astarion's evil route. There are tons more dialogues and way better cutscenes.

I can't believe this. it's such a good game up until the very end.

I only played it once, and i felt like romance is poorly implemented to the story, at least for Astarion. Gale seemed to be the main guy, and Lae'zel the main girl, for their personal quests are a lot more complicated and go on through the entire game. Astarion's personal quest is way off on the side. The whole Raphael and orthron deal to advance through his personal quest feels forced. He is the origin character that's least connected to the main story. You would think for a poster boy who had a huge fan base, he would be more polished.

his romance dialogue and story dialogues are mixed together. That made him seem inconsistent. Sex one night and angry the other. Tav was supposed to be seduced, but conversation options like "i thought you dislike me," "i thought you hate me." Kept popping up. It was immersion breaking. His theatrics already made me cringe, and the inconsistencies just broke the romance for me. Then, after the scar scene, there are no more scenes like that. The entire act 2, aside from his personal quest and romance scene, there was nothing else. Act 3, after cazador, that was it. Aside from some comments here and there, his job is done.

Also, I really wish they would give him a different reaction to tav's invitations. At least after a certain stage, he can refuse her if she is already bloodless, showing that he cares? I feel shadowheart is a part of this relationship bc every morning, tav has to visit her to remove the bloodless debuff.

After all the blood tav fed him, after running to the side to deal with his past, he said, "After everything i sacrificed." What did he sacrifice? Tav cuddled him through the game, all the way!

Lord asty is an abusive asshole. Spawn asty is completely dominated by Tav, lovely.

Maybe he is meant for durge? I will try it eventually, but not soon, still very upset.