#He's just got that special brand of insanity that makes you want to fuck with people

[f1rodrigo]

the mclaren boy mystery | part three

l. norris / o. piastri

summary: in which your boyfriend is a formula one driver for team mclaren and when you finally decide it's time to start hinting to the world, the internet is confused on exactly which driver is your boyfriend. pairing: social media au || lando norris / oscar piastri x reader fc: jazmyn makenna

a/n: honestly i have no clue how long it's been... but I KNOW it's been LONG. and i am incredibly sorry. but wow is it easy for things to just get away from me but i finally got the motivation and want to continue this so here we are! who knows how long it will last but let me not get ahead of myself with any promises. i hope you all are well and enjoy! MWAH <3

part one | part two

sweet relief series | valentine's day

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liked by oscarpiastri, charles_leclerc and 54,899 others

yourusername keepin it classy 🍸 @/alexandrasaintmleux

view all 1,922 comments

user1 not sure classy is the word i'd use...

⤷ user2 seek help<3

user3 WHEN TWO WAGS MEET UP TO MAXIMIZE THEIR JOINT WAG

⤷ user4 stfusshdf im crying

⤷ user5 the way we don't even know for sure if shes a wag

user6 shes so IT girl i cant

alexandrasaintmleux my girl

⤷ yourusername mwah mwah mwah

user7 oscar in the likes bro im gonna end it all

user8 with alex... charles in the likes... double date...walk with me here

⤷ user9 just cause charles liked doesn't mean he was with them 🤷🏻‍♀️

⤷ user10 fr like his gf is in the post 😭

landonorris text me back maybe

⤷ yourusername desperate much

⤷ user11 WHY DOES HE NEED TO TEXT HER WHEN THEY SHOULD BE TOGETHER??????

⤷ user12 bc she was there with oscar... piastri nation RISE 💆‍♀️

⤷ user13 my jaws on the floor i don't know what to believe anymore

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liked by mclaren and 1,282,094 others

yourusername yee... haw?

p.s. a shoutout to @/oscarpiastri for the chugging tips...

view all 3,138 comments

user1 omg ok. can everyone just stay calm.

user2 ARE WE READING THE CAPTION. I REPEAT ARE WE READING THE CAPTION

⤷ user1 great so that'd be a no.

oscarpiastri not sure they boded well seeing as about 5? seconds after that photo there was wine down your shirt... but you're? welcome?

⤷ yourusername …mind ur business piastri

⤷ oscarpiastri hey you dragged me into this mess first

user3 ynoscar nation its been amazing, i think we're nearing our well deserved victory

⤷ user4 LETS NOT GET AHEAD OF OURSELVES

user5 such excellent wag material here guys i NEED to know if she's dating one of them

user7 fuck landoscar DATE ME! LOVE ME!

user8 ynlando nation it feels so over 😪

⤷ user9 WE CANNOT GIVE UP NOW

user10 user landonorris found dead in a ditch

user11 this is certifiably INSANE what do YOU MEAN chugging tips???!?!?!?

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liked by mclaren and 1,282,094 others

landonorris 100 stickers, 100 races, and a brand new trophy to add to the mix 🏆❤️

view all 3,138 comments

user1 the writing on the second pic he is so unserious

user2 ur honor i love him 🥲

yourusername special weekend. congrats.

⤷ user3 why am i getting friend vibes

⤷ user4 fr just grasping at straws now huh 😭😭

⤷ user5 no but the periods???? its giving my mom when shes mad at me

⤷ user6 "special weekend" WHAT DO U MEANNNNN

⤷ user7 maybe it has something to do with the 100th race and podium....... 😭

oscarpiastri good job 👏

⤷ user8 maybe landoscar are dating

⤷ user9 CORRECT!

⤷ user10 at least oscar can add an emoji

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liked by yourusername, mclaren and 102,761 others

oscarpiastri not our weekend... but the company makes it a bit better. 🇲🇽 here we come!

view all 403 comments

user1 you're joking. you're fucking joking.

user2 THE LAST SLIDE YN IS IN THE LAST SLIDE

⤷ user3 PLUS THE CAPTION??????? its giving soft launch im sorry this is basically confirmation

⤷ user4 but like its really not though

mclaren 🧡🧡🧡🧡

user5 nah am i the only one thinking they're just fucking with us at this point 😭

user6 are we forgetting that there are also two other girls in that picture

⤷ user7 well... yes BUT they've been known to be friends of oscars so its like...

⤷ user8 so its like he posted a photo of his friends! yup!

⤷ user9 no fr like yn is also known to be friends with oscar? its all just internet speculation how is this confirmation

⤷ user10 well we've never got a grid post from lando of yn sooooo

⤷ user11 valid point

user12 on to the next!! keep pushing, we love you<3

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landonorris added to their story

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yourusername added to their story

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liked by yourusername, mclaren and 282,654 others

lando.jpg team mclaren

view all 471 comments

user1 this is adorable

user2 NEW JPG POST AKA MY REASON TO LIVE JUST DROPPED

user3 CAPTION LAST SLIDE OH MY GOD IS THAT YN

⤷ user4 I THINK SO SHE WAS WEARING THAT TOP IN COTA

user5 ynlando has never been so alive holy shit

user6 forget ynlando!! we've got oscar in a jpg post 🥹

yourusername 4life

⤷ user7 im in a puddle of tears

⤷ user8 this feels so much like confirmation guys!!!!!!

⤷ user9 idgaf if they're dating or not either way this relationship is so adorable wtf 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

user10 ynoscar truther clocking in! i pretend i do not see!

user11 i'm going to pass out

user12 he considers her part of team mclaren 🥲🥲🥲🥲

user13 i swear they see us freaking out and are like here’s more content to confuse the fuck out of you even more

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part one | part two

taglist:

i know it has been a while so just message me or reply to be removed or added <3333

@landoscar-f1 @urfavnoirette @imsiriuslyreal @geniusalpaca @wadupppp

@tinyhrry @clemmisser @itsprashimusic @leclercdream @eugene-emt-roe

@lozzamez3 @sbrn0905 @ririyulife @not-nyasa @bloodyymaryyy

@ihatetakumi @orangetreekid @ares10156 @susieees-blog

@loloekie @sarx164 @evie-119

@saachiep81 @vicurious28 @awritingtree @callsignwidow

[anantaru]

danheng or jingyuan hate sex 🙉

including. dan heng & jing yuan

cw. rough, fem! reader

— dan heng

dan heng had his eyes on you, day and night, and particularly right now, with his forehead pressing to your own as his body drops on top of you, bouncing forward and back against yours, amplified by the power behind his rough pace.

you can say that it wasn't a big surprise that he was visibly aggressive in this current scenario with your frame tightly squeezed under him, hitting his hips into your cunt as your body follows his dominant lead, your pointy nipples brushing against his well-shaped chest as you whine at the unblended strength permeating in the impacts of his greedy blows, your soaked pussy stretching as he's targeting all the hidden pleasure buttons inside of you.

it's crystal clear and you're aware of the reality— that you both didn't necessarily like each other very much, some might directly go as far as to assume that you extensively detested even being in the same room as each other.

if only your needy bodies wouldn't act so fucking perfectly and fine together, like a golden symphony straight out of an ethereal play— glossy, exposed skin feeling every twitch and ridge of his length between your quivering legs as crystalline pebbles gather slowly on your sticky lashes when you finally decide to speak out for the very first time during this eventful night.

of course— other than moaning and hiccuping at how flawless and great he was fucking you.

"this— fuck! this doesn't change a thing!"

you yell out, hiding your face in his neck and wetly whining when he grinds his shaft into your sweet cunt, a little faster this time and you could swear on it, swear that you heard a subtle laugh against your ear, one of a breathless kind, evidently assimilated with nonchalance.

"d-don't worry." dan heng coos back at you, as you would expect, apathetic by nature, "i wouldn't want to change anything anyways."

— jing yuan

hatred is such a strong word, isn't it?

by all means, jing yuan tends to, on the face of it, find it beyond fitting and flawless when it comes to describing your 'special' relationship— if you can even call it a relationship in the first place.

granted, wether it was anything work related that you two had to be in the same room together for, or seemingly innocent discussions about whatever topic at hand would concern the both of you, you never would agree on anything— it even got to a point where it became an insider between your peers, stating that whatever the case, if you were to choose one route, jing yuan would take the other, just out of spite.

well, but at least only your minds weren't compatible.

because when it came to your bodies, they surely worked in tune with each other and you hated how much the general could get possessive of you too— whilst this was a different story, yet for some reason jing yuan couldn't let you be with someone else, despite him viciously claiming that he couldn't stand your guts.

but what you, on the other hand, couldn't understand all the more, was on how his almost insane possession over your entire being made you crave him twice as much, entirely, how you adored it whenever you melted into his body when he fucked you, it honestly made your mouth water at the simple thought of it.

and how you can just easily wrap your legs around his hips as he thrusts himself into your tight hole, feeling your sore and clamping pussy all over him as you cry out into his neck, desperate and without shame— the knot in your lower belly close and tight, ready to break, so good that it was beginning to ache from inside and out.

his hips were now, surging forward and branding your walls with his pre, and jing yuan, the ever so handsome general, set a steady, yet strong tempo to rocking his thick, thudding cock into you, because you can take it, right? can take him— and perhaps you both were indeed lucky in a way, to have found at least something that for one, will make you choose the same route.

©2023 anantaru do not repost, copy, translate, modify

[lesbiandanhowell]

Sam reacts to: Dan and Phil React to Every Phil is not on fire! #2

I am not ready for this in the slightest but here we go

- Why THAT clip from pinof, they made fun of it the whole time in the first video yet they keep coming back to it.

- I still have a sharpie in my drawer...

- The way they continue the dressing alike theme it is so cute, and Dan asking how Phil still has the same shirt when he literally is wearing the exact same mhmh sure.

- WHY AM I SO AFRAID OF PINOF 4

- "because you're 12" They have always known their audience a little too much, like they know that now we're all adults and gay back then they knew we were all just teens.

- I am sobbing with laughter 3 minutes in AND JUST NOTICED IT IT IS 32 MINUTES LONG.

- STOP DAN YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO CALL ME OUT LIKE THIS. I am the number one person that points out little giggles after cuts this is LITERALLY a personal attack. I have done this for almost every single gamingmas video so sadly this is not a call out for past me but very much attacking me right now.

- THE AMOUNT OF ATTACKS IN THIS. Phil making fun of the nose smudge, like they just are coming for us left and right holy shit

- Tumblr mention, Dan if you don't want to see us be obnoxious about you guys touching then don't come on tumblr, let us be weird in peace.

- LMAO THE SUNDAY TIMES TRAUMA FOR DAN

- I am literally crying 11 minutes in and I am kind of glad they just didn't mention the 2012 trauma because I don't think I could go through talking about it.

- Dan reblogging this video but not any other recent gaming video... He's got priorities and it is calling us tf out, I see how it is.

- PHIL TALKING ABOUT THE BEDSHEETS AND JUST TALKING HIMSELF INTO A HOLE. Like I would have thought he meant Sharpie getting on it but he just fully went there and made it sound sexual.

- They keep making fun of us and then they keep doing the neck touch thing and like HOW ARE WE MEANT TO NOT LOSE OUR MINDS.

- "I think the vibes are better in this one" Yes, 2013 PINOF will always be better because 2012 was traumatic in ways we don't talk about.

- "Oh your tongue action there Dan" PHIL WHAT THE FUCK MAN

- Not them leaving out any kind of reaction to the "you are [special]", it would have been too real.

- Dan with the peach emoji for phils bum what

- THE LIZARD DUET AND THE WAY PHIL LOOKS AT DAN FUCK YOU AND FUCK YOU. Genuinely how do you expect me not to comment on that, I am lonely and single and living vicariously through you being sappy.

- The fuck did Dan say to make Phil laugh and me sob with laughter like it was so funny even tho I have no idea what he said. Dan doing a little squeak when he laughs is adorable, like at the very end.

- Phil I will literally fight you if you keep doing an impression of us going they are touching like fuck you let us have some peace. (I won't actually, we deserve this)

- The way Phil looks ACTUALLY sad when Dan explains that the existential crisis branding was just him suffering in silence, now we know this but back then it just seemed funny :(

- The fact they put themselves on the same level as Doctor Who and Sherlock is insane but so real, like they really were.

- NOT THE CATBOY MENTION AGAIN I LITERALLY ALMOST DROPPED MY FAVOURITE MUG. I wish this was a joke but I had such a visceral reaction I almost pulled my favourite mug off my desk.

- THEY PLAYED POPPY AT 4AM WHAT. They have only learned so much since then have they.

This send me places I didn't know I could experience and Dan saying to expect the next one in the next few weeks scares me that it won't be during Gamingmas anymore.

Check #sam reacts for posts about all videos and see you tomorrow!

[m4yday-m4yday]

Hi, I'm gonna rant abt going to an art store so there's a lot to read lol

I went to an art store and I thought I'd be able to calmly walk in there, find the sketchbook I wanted, look at pens, and walk out.

But I was wrong. Because I'm autistic and art is my special interest.

What ended up happening was that I walked in there, got distracted by this trinket that attaches to a pencil and it has an eraser and a sharpener, told my brother about it and started infodumping on different brands he should use if he wants a pencil sharpener, and embarrassing him cus I was getting too passionate. After that detour, I zoomed down to the back of the store where the sketchbooks were, and they didn't have the type of sketchbook I like! I like hardcover spiral 8.5x11 in sketchbooks, they're perfect for making comics cus they have plenty of space, and they're good for bigger drawings. They even had the brand I liked, but they had all of the sizes and types EXCEPT my very specific favorite type. I was getting a little too upset, so I asked one of the (very patient) people who worked there to see if they had any and I just couldn't find it. And still, it wasn't there. I continued to zoom around and try to find a replacement, but it was either too small, the paper texture was off, the paper wasn't secure enough in the spiral, or it was too expensive. I ended up settling for a smaller version of what I wanted, it was only 5.5x8.5 in. Then, (since I'm not finacially independent yet and need him to access my money) my dad walked in, thinking I was ready to check out. He found me in a state of panic/excitement, flapping my hands and getting all worked up over the sketchbook issue. He was looking at me weirdly, so I decided to go look at the pens because I need a new red pen (I love red pens, a bold red as an accent color is very appealing to me). I wanted a felt tip pen instead of a gel roller pen since the ink doesn't get as blocked up, so I decided to go and ask the store people again for help. And of course, I was incredibly excited and overwhelmed, so my speech was all jumbled but I got my question out and one of the people showed me the felt tipped pens. I cannot explain to you how fucking excited about pens I got. It was bad. I chose three pens, and I proceeded to the checkout where my dad was waiting with his face in his hands. Like he was apologizing profusely and he was very embarrassed. The cashier was understanding though, she said it was good that I was excited (I'm sure she thought it was weird though). Anyway, I'm very excited about my new pens. They're nice and juicy and ready to draw and that makes me insanely happy :))))))))) Not happy about the sketchbook though, I'm very particular.

That's the end of the rant lmao sorry

[sadboytournament]

ROUND ONE

Propaganda

Adriane Tepes/Alucard: Bro's mom got murdered and his dad went insane and tried to wipe out humanity, and Adrian had to kill him to save everyone. AND THEN he had to deal with people trying to revive his dad to cause even more deaths! Also he's immortal so he's outlived everyone he's ever cared about 😭

Jason Todd: (tw: sexual assault mention) the second robin, gets taken in by bruce after his abusive dad walks out and his mum dies of an overdose (and he also steals the wheels of the batmobile, king). bruce trains him to be robin and for his original run he was a pretty cute kid (with the occasional Angst Arcs that are pretty common w robin - special shoutout to jason finding out his dad was actually killed by two face and he just didnt know, and an arc where a woman that reminds him of his mum gets raped by a guy that iirc has diplomatic immunity i think?? or enough power to get away with it? anyway jason fucking kills him so not that immune ig) then death in the family happened and jason found out his mum isnt his biological mum so he sets off trying to find his bio mum, and eventually he meets her, but shes working for the joker and sells jason out to him. the joker then proceeds to beat jason with a crowbar and blows the building hes in up with his mum also inside it, killing them both. dc then does a fun thing for the next 20 years where they start treating jason like the '"""troubled""" """angry""" robin who was too reckless and was always going to end up dead. eventually dc brings jason back (as dc is wont to do), by having him wake up inside his coffin years after dying, dig his way out with his bare hands, and walk half-dead in the general direction of wayne manor until he's hit by a car and taken to the hospital (where all his says is 'bruce' over and over, and when asked who bruce is he responds 'my dad' and passes out) eventually he ends up in talia al ghul's care and is dunked in a lazarus pit to revive him completely, and he finds out not only is the joker still alive, but batmans also replaced him as robin. jason returns to gotham as red hood and has an honestly pretty slay arc where he taunts bruce by doing a better job of cleaning up gotham than him ngl. eventually it all culminates with him luring batman to a building where hes keeping the joker and telling b that his no kill rule is bullshit, and he shouldve killed the joker for taking jason away from him. he gives bruce an ultimatum thats basically if you dont kill me ill kill the joker, you gotta pick' and bruce chooses to instead disarm jason and save them both, and jason escapes. what follows is a lot of ups and downs for red hood comics (mostly due to the "angry robin" narrative dc writers have spun, making a lot of jasons appearances wildly ooc fights, lots of weird (tragically in character) cringefail behaviour, and this odd period where hes a natural redhead and his helmet is this ugly dome). itd be too long to list every jason todd sadboy moment from the last 20 years here but i do want to give a special shoutout to a currect story arc where bruce (who thinks hes being controlled by a 'perfect batman' hes got in his head) gets sick of jason's """reckless behaviour""" and fucking alters jasons brain chemistry so that whenever his adrenaline rises, he'll have a panic attack so severe hes basically incapacitated and can barely speak through his fear (the instant he escapes bruce's captivity he jumps into a burning building to save a little girl im SOFT for him!!). also second special shoutout to the jason todd in the arkham games who didnt even have the luxury of dying at the jokers hand, and was instead tortured for like 3 years, branded, beaten by p much everyone in batmans rogues gallery (and some of jokers goons dressed as batman), eventually jason breaks himself out only to find out that NOT ONLY has bruce replaced him, but it took the man like. a month. like jason wouldnt be thought dead for a long time, he was missing and bruce just went 'ill let this new kid adopt himself' ig? also theres a vr game in the arkham series where you can go into arkham asylum and hear jason screaming 🙃

[motheatenscarf]

oOOOH MY GOD, FINALLY

I found out about Beast Tribe quests back when I was still in ARR, tried doing them, realized what a miserable slog it was gonna be, and then avoided them like the plague until I got to Shadowbringers and loved the Pixies SO MUCH that I would do literally anything just to get more of them. Started doing some others too because I liked them, Namazu (my exact brand of like, goblin muppets kind of stupid, i love them so much), Ananta, Omicrons, etc, basically anybody who didn't want me to craft and wasn't from ARR.

Maxed out like 4 or 5 that way but then I found out that there are allied beast tribe quests that give you special emotes, but you can't do those until you max out EVERY faction from a specific expansion.

And I went, oh no, I'm going to have to CRAFT.

So then I spent 2 months grinding all crafting to get to omnicrafter, and figured, well, I'm suffering and determined already, and I know I can withstand a lot of punishment NOW for a good reward later, but I might lose resolve after too long of this, may as well get these done in chronological order.

So I spent every day doing 12 missions a day for the FUCKING IXAL. I am not gonna lie, y'all... I just started skipping cutscenes halfway through. I was so burnt out. I hated them by proxy. I have no idea what happened there.

And then I had to do the others. Amalj'aa quests are alright. Would love to introduce Loonh Gah to uh, clothes, eventually. And not in the condescending way the Allied Tribe quest does. Slyph quests were cute, I like the Sylphs, they're like bargain bin pixies. Kobolds were also cute, the least awful grind imo because all their quests were like, right there, and nobody made me go tear assing off to the other side of the map on special mounts or timed mission carries where I had to click a stupid mushroom to make it in time or some bullshit. And then the Sahagin, who were my personal favorites, because it's the #1 fish dad and his army of idiot children and one of them sings Golem's fish song and also he said he'd be my dad too and I love all of my idiot fish brothers.

So after all that I did the allied quests and met uh... bargain bin catboy Zenos?

Complete with "weirdly misogynistic introductions," except he doesn't even get redeemed by going off the rails bugfuck insane. Oh well. At least now the ARR tribes have figured out intersectional solidarity so that one scene in Endwalker feels more earned.

Now I just have to do the Vath, the Moogles, and the Vanu, who are all located in 3 of the worst zones for getting around easily in the game.

I love Moogles so I really hope they'll remind me what joy feels like as I get through the rest of these. I miss the Pixies and Namazu so much...

[storiesofsvu]

Alright, it’s finale time. Is anyone else nervous?

I think I’d likely be more nervous is paramount hadn’t released SO many fucking teaser stills from the episode. And I’m not even talking about ones from this week, the one of em all covered in soot and dried blood was released WEEKS ago. And most of the main team has the “Meredith grey/olivia benson effect” where we know that nothing serious is going to happen to them so there’s no stakes when they are about to get shot/blown up/etc.

But then they go and release even more promo pics that are practically spoilers.. like.. what are y’all even doing? At least the tik tok person knows how to run shit LOL.

Anyways, here we go!

Oh GOOD! He’s hallucinating again… wonderful

Okay… what fucking kind of game is going on here? Is frank bullshitting? Are him and jade working together? Who’s actually playing hardball rn??

Okay at least this answers the question of what happened to her vest lol.

“shes injured” I think she’s relatively okay girl, she’s just knocked the fuck out, she’s been through worse..

Ngl it would be a helluva good plot twist if peter b WAS just doug bailey under a different name and he was still alive. I need a fucking INSANE plot twist like that in one of my shows

Im also ngl, I’m hella here for unsub jade. I wish she would have been the primary unsub for the season, a female is bad ass enough but someone as young as her is awesome.

UGH YES BADASS PRENTISS, THANK YOU. Uuugggh yessss using that fucking big brain. I love her so much. I’m so glad we got to see all sides/layers of Emily this season and I can’t wait to see what the rest of the episode holds!

I feel like 55 minutes is NOT enough to fully resolve everything that has happened this season. Like, yeah I know that there’s likely gonna be a cliffhanger but come ON.

How TF is voit in THAT low security of a prison??? That looks like a cheap motel!??

Also.. im not mad about him being a regular (as long as he’s not imaginary) cause Zach is SO good and he’s charismatic and this season he really brought some comedy and major likeability to the character we hated last season

It doesn’t matter what I see doug bailey in he will FOREVER be the guy from Fired Up. Lol.

“the first time I was in the field I threw up…” “really?” “no. I was just trying to make you feel better.” LOOOL.

Jfc there are SO many times paget does her little tongue/lip tick thing

Man I was JUST wondering if we were gonna get more Phil Coulson this season or not

“can we turn down the testosterone for one second?” loooll Rebecca. I love you SO much. She just hates men.

So this ENNNTTIIIRRREEE thing could have been avoided if the director had just put his foot down and told doug no??!!! put the foot down for Emily and threaten her entire career she’s built but let little doug do whatever he wants to try and save  his family’s ass. Uugggh I hate it here

YEEESSS REBECCA WITH THE FUCK. She’s like, 5 foot 2 at the most and her dick is so big, I just know it

AHAHAHAHAHA again voit with the comedy, fucking clown, I love it.

OH MY GOD! The still of Emily walking away from brian she IS SO DONE WITH HIS FUCKING SHIT. She looks SO pissed

God bless everyone who gifs this episode cause I swear its darker than normal. You are all angels.

Emily being tortured like this should not be this hot. LOL

Also like.. a taser’s gotta be tame compared to a branding. Our girl will be fine.

“our special time in the cell”  *gags*

Oooohhhhhkay. THIS is why tyler’s in the field and in an fbi vest. Okay. I take back what I said to the besties earlier

How and WHY is voit not HANDCUFFED.

PENELOPE BEING THE ONE STARING VOIT DOWN OMG YESSSS (and even jj stepping up incase she needs to get inbetween them. LOVE that.)

Not her password (presumably) being a derek call back. This seasons REALLY did a good job calling back to previous cast! (now bring blake back you cowards)

Oh fuck you voit

At least we’re getting some kind of closure on this baugate shit. “neither does your wife” WHAT. Damn jj. YEEESSS DOM! FUCKING JJ COMING OUT TO PLAY. UUGGGHH everyone so fucking hot this episode

PAGET IS SUCH A GOOD FUCKING ACTRESS JFC

The tiniest hint of realization and fear flashing across her face?! Give her all the awards pls.

Okay that was some HORRIBLE continuity. Emily’s hair all mussed up, her bangs falling out of her ponytail all episode and suddenly one of them is curled PERFECTLY.

Holy FUCK luke thank fucking god

Tara and Emily in matching shirts.. girlfriiieeeends (they might not be the same but whatever lol)

“tell me if its real” this is legit our future on all sides of the law now, AI has come WAY too fucking far and it freaks me out.

Uuggghh jaaaadddeeeeee she’s literally been through so much hell and her breaking down to prentiss and Emily saying she knows exactly what she’s talking about and filling in the blanks?!!? UUGGH MY HEART

…where’s tyler… (like jj even said he would get to find out if Emily was alive and ….where tf is he??)

“I am a dad so I know a passive aggressive action report when I see it” HAHAHAH

EXCUSE ME? EMILY IS THE *SECTION* CHIEF!! WOW that mis writing

So…do they only have the budget for garcia’s apartment now?

Ohh.. okay and now tyler’s gonna be a series regular?? God they’re still fucking flirting and there are still vibes there and I do not hate it. Im so sorry.

“Hooray you’re alive” LOOOOLLL Emily deserves that cake like 4 times over

Okay im glad Rebecca and tara are back together and happy but I do really wish we’d gotten a little bit of the “offscreen” development on that.

Jfc the hallucination of voit JUMP SCARE

Okay so most of it got wrapped up pretty well. It looks like jade is getting some help, voit is likely murdered in prison (shade to the cm team who said “someone’s gonna DIE” and all of us were barely concerned and they just made it him.. like.. you guys suck at promo)

I’ll rewatch Sunday or later, but overall, I liked this season. There were moments I was not into it and episodes that I loved. Sometimes that was just the jumping around and sometimes that was likely me being too tired to be able to connect the dots. I wish we’d jumped into things a little quicker and had jade around for more of the season, but I’ll take what we can get!!

Now imma either gonna go start from s3 again OR I’m gonna start with blake’s seasons cause I desperately miss her and I do need to watch the later seasons again….

[dzpenumbra]

2/15/23

Things have been in a pretty steady decline lately. I'm sure it's pretty apparent in my writing. Today was especially difficult.

I'm just turning off a skate video I had on so I can focus on this. I should really get this out. I heard back from my old therapist, the one who worked with me the summer before the pandemic and bridging through the beginning and peak of it. He was very nice, thoughtful and kind in how he responded. But I did not process the response well. At all.

I'm still trying to think more positively, see the silver lining, all that. I really am trying. But there's something very deep and very... hurt... that got set off. Again. He's not going to help me. I swear to god, the most common phrase I've heard out of people in the mental health field over the past 5 years has been "I can't help you" or "I don't know how to help you". Can any of you just like... point me in the direction of someone who can?! I mean, it's not like... once you just walk away and say "sorry dude, I can't be your friend", or whatever they're saying to me... it's not like my problems just... disappear. It's like they expect me to just wake up someday and just... be a different person... who doesn't have the struggles that I have. That I'm just going to snap out of it and suddenly my life will just fall together.

So I try to be patient. I try to be proactive. I do my research, both internally and externally. I study. I learn. I strategize. But... what fucking good is my study, what good is my research and strategizing when I only have half a fucking picture?! I don't have perspective. And the fucked up part? Most people detest perspective. It usually sets them off. Critique, criticism, feedback, whatever phrase you want for it. Most conflicts I've witnessed involved this. I need perspective. And the whole fucking state is making me jump through hoops for this, not a single person is volunteering to assist.

Right now I'm referring to the ADHD screening, I can tell I'm being vague. Let me sum up the history here. Problems in highschool - ADD screening: positive. Got a diagnosis and a 504 plan. I was in special education for a fucking year, when my older brother was valedictorian, talk about humiliating. Flunk out of my first semester of college due to PTSD - ADD screening: positive. Got into a special education college which I promptly dropped out of because they tried to cram me in a dorm room with 2 other students, one of which brought his girlfriend over to stay the night on my first night there and... brought back even more trauma. And, on top of that, I got screened for ADD a third time back in... probably 2017 or 2018? And they never fucking gave me my results. I drove an hour to this medical building that was like completely empty, I sat in a silent room with someone and did this stupid test thing, and never got the fucking results. I was just so fed up at that point, I just gave up on it.

Now, 2023. And I can't get my current therapist, my former therapist or my brand new GP to just sit down for one fucking hour so I can either confirm this and start studying new skills... or cross it off the list and look deeper, try to understand how my trauma, depression and anxiety are creating these insanely disruptive barriers. I feel like all I do is just... wait. I just fucking wait for people to give me one hour of their time. And at that point, the pressure on me to make months worth of progress in one fucking hour is just... it's impossible. The pressure cracks me.

This may be hard for others to relate to, but this is something extremely familiar to me, try to imagine this. Imagine you are living 100% alone. That means no calls, no texts, no friends, no family. And your only social interaction is one 45 minute Zoom meeting. Per week. I doubt most people can even imagine that. Like... I don't even know how to catch others up on how much has even happened in that week in less than an hour, let alone talk about super important shit. And when all your social needs are condensed into one venue, it overwhelms people, it repels them. I swear, this shit is disastrous.

And I just feel really fucking lost and powerless. I don't know who I am. I don't know why I struggle so much with such simple things. I've been waiting for over 2 months to just... explore this possibility. And here I am.

My old therapist gave me the names of two places he could refer me to. Yeah, I know, after that tirade, right? Yeah. It'll make sense in a minute. There's a doctor in my area he can refer me to, but he doesn't know the guy personally. And... he can refer me to a Psychiatry place... that I used to go to 10 years ago. The place where my med problems all started. Where the floodgates were opened. And, being completely honest, just reading the name of that place just made me collapse in on myself. Like... wow... I'm literally exactly where I started. A fucking decade down the drain. For what?

Sounds like depression? Correct!

I'm tired. I'm tired of being tossed around for different people to study and pick apart and figure out what's broken in me and try to mold me into their ideal version of a human. I'm tired of trying so fucking --- I can't even let myself type it. Like I didn't even finish the thought and went "you could try fucking harder and you know it." Good lord. I'm so mean to myself. -_-

All of my life, all I've wanted was to make cool videos, or make cool music, or make cool art. For people. For friends. For people like me. For people who want to experience cool stuff. I want to share the interesting things I've learned, the unique perspective I have, the skills I've devoted countless hours to developing. I want to share my passions. And no one seems to want to share them. Not my friends, not my family, no one. No one even really seems to miss me when I'm not there. And that really just... it makes me feel... obsolete. It makes me feel like I'm doing something wrong. Like there's something wrong with me. Like I'm not trying hard enough. Like I'm not good enough, interesting enough, attractive enough, in shape enough, funny enough. Like I am not worth seeking out. Like my contributions, my perspective, my self, are easily replaceable.

And the only venue I can think of to go to in a hail mary for social connection is basically just becoming a cesspool of advertisements, corporate shills and carbon copy fad-chasers. And the audience isn't much better, and they all seem very satisfied with what they are consuming. And I miss my people, man. I miss my fucking people. Because Twitch isn't my fucking people anymore. Call of Duty hasn't been my people since like fucking 2009. Minecraft hasn't been my people since they sold out to Microsoft and rebranded to target microtransactions to children. I just... I don't really know where my people are. Or how to find them. And honestly, I'm not even really sure entirely who my people are anymore.

There are some skaters I get along with, but we're a ragtag bunch and there are a lot that I don't. There were a lot of gamers that I got along with, but gaming got so fucking big that like... the title "gamer" could mean anything from a retiree to a high school jock. I could try to connect with fellow artists, but I honestly don't know how or where.

I guess I'm just scared. Scared of rolling the dice, after looking around at my friend roster and realizing that not a single one of them really cared that much about me, they just cared about how they felt when they were around me. How I made them feel. How I would visit them, and entertained them, and listened to them, and inflated their ego. And the second I asked them to get involved in my life in a meaningful way? KABOOM. Screamed at. Like I just cussed out the Lord himself. Not even exaggerating. It's so surreal looking back at it, like... I never really though people actually acted that way in real life. Even in the moment, I was like... "what are they misunderstanding?" "They can't possibly believe this is too much to ask..."

So yeah, all of this, all this shitstorm that's pouring onto the page right now, that's been swirling around in my head like a poison soup all goddamn day. And I have no idea what to do about it. And frankly, I'm ready to just throw it on a shelf and say fuck the mental health, I just wanna make cool beads for right now. So let me catch you up on what I did today.

I measured out a bracelet mala. The number of beads is symbolic, I guess it's derived from Buddhism, but also Hinduism (which is more of a collection of belief systems than an actual religion). Typically they are multiples of 9, the standard is 108, which I'm guessing my necklace is. I decided to try 27 out, to see how that worked length-wise. I had to downsize it to smaller beads but the size worked decently, it's just weird because since the cordage isn't elastic... I need to have it be big enough to squeeze over my hand, but not big enough to fall off. And it does, it fits pretty well and doesn't fall off, it's just very loose fitting. From there, I did a test bead. I did a black basecoat and some very basic opaque pink line work over it. From there, I did 5 layers of Mod Podge in about 30 minute intervals. Then I sanded it, which I think I fucked up a little bit by not wet-sanding it, unfortunately. I don't know why, I just had it in my head that like... if I wet sanded... the glaze was going to dissolve or something. Like... it better not... XD But I used water very sparingly in the rough sanding and I think I paid for it. So next time I'm going to do a 600 grit instead of 400 and I'm going to make sure I wet sand. But even with the slip ups, I brought it to a nice buff shine and it looks pretty good, it looks like it could be plastic. I think that's going to work nicely.

The next thing I need to figure out, which was baking my noodle (thanks The Oracle for getting that stuck in my head since the 90's), was how to get these beads on some kind of thing that stably rotates. Like a lathe, but... for painting. So I can get nice symmetrical equatorial lines. I'm giving up on longitudinal lines, I'll wing that shit, but latitudinal symmetry makes a very big visual impact and I'd really like to get that figured out. So, in my head, I'm picturing some kind of mount to fit a wooden dowel into. The wooden dowel needs to be the right size for the holes in these beads, enough to snugly fit and hold them. Then the dowel sits in the mount and I can put a crank on the other end of the dowel. The crucial part of that is that the beads do not move. Or... I can just continue to freestyle it. Either way.

I'm tempted to take another trip to Michal's and see if they have any kind of contraption like this. It would make my life so much easier. To paint that bead, I had to wrap a piece of paper around an eyelet screw, put the screw in the vice, and then flip the bead when it was time to do the other side. It... wasn't the most convenient setup. All in all, though, I've had some decent results from these past 2 days of bead medium tests. I'm excited to see what this culminates to.

I have also had a project in mind for my mom. I think it might actually be a really thoughtful and helpful thing for her. I got a bunch of garnet beads for her christmas gift that... never really got made. Fights and all that. I had all the materials, but... I just... it's really hard to make a gift for someone who is fighting with you, you know? So... the beads and the centerpiece just kinda sat there for months. And her birthday came and went and all that. So... I was thinking of making a small mala with them, with the intention of passing it along with some documentation on what they are for. I want to try to use mine to experiment with mantra meditation, prayer and all that, which is very new to me. But she may find use from this in a very practical way through... grounding. Hell, maybe I need one deliberately intended for that as well. The intention is to have every bead represent a breath and to track your breathing exercise with it. So I was just thinking, maybe I should split it. Do 9 garnets, then a... something different, maybe a wooden bead, to mark an interval. Then repeat that twice, but the last one is a distinctly bigger one intended to signify the end of the cycle. They call that the guru bead. So you can do smaller breathing sequences with it too, not just the big 27 breath one, which might be a tall order in the middle of a heated conflict or a busy workday or something. Or at least it might seem like one. But 9 breaths? I think we can all make time for that. And the tactile nature of it lets you keep your eyes closed and know where you are, and if you want to do another 9? Just keep going. The intention is to use the tactile, maybe even smell association(I read people will douse the tassel in essential oil sometimes), to bring awareness back to the present moment. Especially in a moment of acute stress or panic, overwhelm, whatever it might be. To take a second, breathe, let the rest go for a minute until you get to the wooden bead, then choose how you want to go forward with a clear mind.

The more I talk about this, the more I am making myself aware that I need to practice this more as well. I'm sure it's going to be glaringly obvious to me when I read this back, too. (edit: It is.)

Before I wrap up, I should mention. Today was really hard for me emotionally. It was a such lonely day. And it's mine. The most loneliest day of my liiiiiife. (sorry) I don't know about downstairs, because I can't hear them - though they can probably hear me, sorry... - but all of my other neighbors are couples. From about 5:30 on, I had happy couples in fuckin surround sound. And here I am. More alone than I've ever been. It just sucked. I even made cookies and it didn't make it better. So yeah. Just...

I've had like... maybe two decent Valentine's Days my entire life. I've had maybe 5 Valentine's Days where I was actually in a relationship in my life. And I'm a romantic. And, to be blunt, the women who received my generous romance, they didn't deserve it. And they didn't appreciate it. And they sorta... planted seeds in my head that it wasn't worth being romantic in those ways, that it will be undervalued and unappreciated. I'm really sad that I let myself walk away from those gestures. But I'm really glad that I'm no longer there. Because once I find my partner, they're going to get the most thoughtful, kind, loving gestures from me, with no reservations. Because if I feel I need to hold back those expressions, I must learn from my past relationships and really try to understand why. Why would I not want to shower them with my genuine affection? Because others took advantage of it, and didn't even want it? Or is it because I feel like my partner won't believe it's genuine? Or that they will reject it or find it overbearing? If those are the case, I'd need to address those immediately, because it might be incompatibility.

Good lord, even my fictional relationships are dysfunctional! <head in hands>

I need to find a good place to meet people like me, where I will feel comfortable and not utterly overwhelmed. I thought the internet was going to help with that, but it's changed so much over the past 5+ years. I don't know where the real people are anymore. So... I might have to just give up on that and brave the real world. Which seems more likely to bring me a solid connection in my life: a yoga studio, a weird witchcraft store, a zen center, a board game shop, a small coffee shop? I honestly don't know. But one of these days coming up, I'm going to try one. I mean it. I just need to cultivate the confidence, because my confidence meter is like an imperceptible sliver right now.

Good vibes to end on? I've been playing Rimworld offline. I haven't really let myself enjoy it because of that but... the main character got married, which made me really happy. I went to get my cookies out of the oven and the game is on No Pause Challenge, so it was just running without me, and I came back and Lissandra and Slick were getting married! It made me so happy. They both worked night shift together, it's how they met. She's a sanguophage, the revered holy leader of the colony, and he was a young former criminal refugee, who she has now given the gift of immortality. So basically, the high priestess and the janitor became lovers because he was a night owl and she's a vampire. So... I guess he won the jackpot as far as climbing the social ladder goes! They seem really happy together so far, and I'm very curious to see if they naturally try for kids or not (I'm very new to the new DLC mechanics) and whether the sanguophage (vampire) gene can be passed on through birth or only through gene conversion. I did lose my other starter colonist, Omni, she was such an amazing soul. She was a level 18 builder with a 12+ specialization in architecture, and... for a tribal... that's really goddamn impressive. It was a very painful loss. She got jacked by a cheetah doing field work, no one could get to her in time. It sucked. A lot. But, that's life, and we move on. Lissandra will plan a ceremony for her soon. And I quit right after getting an insane raid that did a shit ton of damage so my colonists are going to have a lot of cleaning up and mourning to do tomorrow. I chose to do Rimworld again because it's a game I can actually have play itself in the background while I do art. Not a lot of games work like that.

Alright, bed. Here's hoping for an easier day tomorrow. Maybe I can even get out into nature? Or to Michael's? We'll see.

[trombonechurchill]

Fuck It Friday!

Slowly but surely pecking away at my Henren flower AU with a vague and very hopeful goal to get it done by new years. We shall see... but here is a snippet!

“So-” Hen starts, breezing past Karen and making a beeline for the counter as Karen struggles to untangle herself from the hose she’d been using to mist the ferns near the front. “Oh no, what this time?” Karen says in disbelief, picking the squirt bottle out of Hen’s grip that she’d been fiddling with and aiming at her threateningly till she raises her palms in defeat. “I hope you guys get insurance because the number of Get Well Soon bouquets you come in here buying is starting to get concerning,” she says, finally settling herself in behind the counter and making herself comfortable, ready for whatever insane injury or event her or the 118 managed to get themselves into this time. “You’re my flower girl, where else would I go? But no, it’s a good one this time,” Hen says with a fond twist of her mouth and Karen can’t help the way face goes warm as her eyes trace the curve of Hen’s lips for a moment as she parses that one.  “‘Flower girl’?” Karen repeats dubiously, eyebrows raising. “I’ve got my cake guy and my flower girl,” Hen says easily, ticking them off on her fingers and looking pleased with herself. “Uh huh,” Karen says flatly, doing her best to hide the way the word ‘my’ makes her stomach flutter with a roll of her eyes. “You said it’s good news for once? I didn’t think you guys were capable of that,” she ribs gently. “Yeah, our little probie survived his probationary period, and he only got fired twice which I think we can all agree is a miracle,” Hen says, eyes still shining in that way that she knows drives Karen wild wanting more details. Karen tries not to take the bait. “Oh well if he only got fired two times I better bust out the good flowers,” she says, shaking her head.  “Does this mean you’ve been holding out on me?” Hen asks, mock offended. Karen just hums, already reaching for a bundle of dahlias and holding them up questioningly.  At first, Hen had let Karen have free reign, giving her the general occasion (and boy had some of those been a doozy until she’d gotten used to the 118’s special kind of chaos), but now Hen seemed to enjoy being involved, or at the very least sitting at the counter and running a commentary as she put something together. Karen likes it. It’s not exactly a lonely existence, working in the shop, but she’d be lying if she said she didn’t enjoy Hen’s company when she dropped by, Hen’s special brand of teasing that felt like a chess match and a hug at the same time. It’s all Karen can do to keep up and give as good as she gets before she gets too flustered. “What about some of the green things in there too?” Hen offers helpfully as Karen gets finished trimming a few stems, setting the shears aside so she can level Hen with a properly unimpressed look. Hen continues to twirl a finger in the air, motioning vaguely to the buckets of flowers near Karen’s elbow. “Ferns? You mean ferns, one of the most basic ass-” “Look we didn’t all go to flower school-” “I’ll have you know I have a botany degree thank you very much- Ugh, flower school, unbelievable.” “Wow, really?” Karen’s surprised that Hen looks suitably impressed at that, her hands stilling when Hen gives her another once over.  “Well yeah, they don’t just let anyone work in florists you know,” she says, stuffing a few ferns into the arrangement with a little more force that is perhaps strictly necessary so she doesn’t do anything crazy like ask Hen if she thinks a masters in botany are hot. Who asks that, who thinks that? And yet, even as Karen finishes up the bouquet for Hen’s probie, watching her sign the congratulatory note with a message Karen’s pretty sure borders on insulting if not for the fond smile as Hen did it, she can’t help but replay the look in Hen’s eyes and wonder if she wasn’t imagining the interest in Hen’s eyes.

[jooniperbonsai]

One of these days I’m going to have to tell y’all in more detail this insane story and the many connections and weird coincidences that happen to me but basically when I booked my trip to Korea back in October I knew BTS would all be enlisted by then.

But I have this weird esp thing with Namjoon or something where he usually pops up into places I inhabit or will say something uncanny in an interview that I recently said verbatim to my group of friends.

But it’s like from an outside perspective you would assume I’m just insane but if you know me or ever meet me and spend time with me long enough you’ll start pointing shit out to me. Anyway, so I booked my trip and I said to my best friend “watch me book this trip for my birthday and I’ll be walking under some cherry blossoms and that just so happens to be the time Namjoon takes his military leave and then I’ll have some kdrama moment where we meet under falling petals…and then I’ll fight him for stealing my brand. “

And we laughed being like oh that’s funny it’ll never happen. And then sure fucking enough the DAY I landed in Seoul he went out to eat with his friends and he did the Leeum museum and ate hotteok and took a selfie weekend but I had gotten some earlier that day with my friend and posted it to my story????

My friend and I learned that the entire time he was on his leave, according to K army, bro was consistently around the corner from me the entire weekend. Went to dinner at a place a block away from her house. Was at art galleries a block away from the palace during the day we did the palace tour.

On my birthday my friend and I ended up riding bikes along the Han River in his honor and she took me to the spot that she said was the special part of the river mouth that he used to go to. So we sat and I journaled and we talked while watching the river move. As we got up for dinner we biked up this hill and I was screaming “FUCK” in English over how intense it was and and when I looked up I made eye contact with a guy who had his eyes, haircut, clothes, was his height, just was wearing a face mask and I was like “oh cool I’m hallucinating” and afterward my friend came flying off her bike going “this is going to sound insane but that guy back there I am almost certain was him. I’ve never met or seen any idols out before but this time I swear it was him” 😂.

Was it? Idk man. I like to think it was to really just make it even funnier and insane but that could have been anyone. All of this to say:

Isn’t it weird how many people your life circles around and you’re just passing ships? How many people do you think we do that with? The only reason I can even track this was because he’s a celebrity so people are always reporting where he is or he’s announcing it himself. But all those anonymous people we pass every single day and we never meet?Fate lines never cross, it’s wild to me.

I think about stuff like that all the time. Do y’all have people who you are like always just missing each other by a moment or an event or something? I feel like one day I’ll run right smack into him and be like “okay you and me in the parking lot we have to fight this out, young grasshopper” 😂😂😂

Anyway, wanted to share a crazy story. Whether it’s something as big as this or him sharing a song to his story by an artist I listened to who didn’t have a lot of exposure before (and now they will LOL) I can only laugh every time i think about how close I was to him and maybe even passed him some of those days and didn’t even notice🙃

[nowitswetme]

Dirty Talk from Dean’s Magic Mouth

Word Count: ~1075

Warnings: all the dirty talk - consistent use of the f word, slight domDean, slight degradation, thigh riding, mentions of p-in-v sex and rough sex, and pure addictive heaven from Dean’s perfect lips

A/n: part of the Dean Winchester NSFW Alphabet

No one in the history of ever has been as good at dirty talk as Dean Winchester is. He’s oh so crazy good at it. Like, could-make-you-cum-with-just-his-words-in-under-two-minutes crazy good. A literal lifetime of practice in smooth talking of all sorts has made him insanely talented with his words. Which is a very good thing. Because since his mind is always going, so is his mouth.

He’s irresistible in person. You’ve routinely gone from calm and composed to completely soaked in twenty seconds. There’s nothing like hearing Dean purr his own special brand of dirty poetry in his low, lust-soaked timbre. That same deep voice and verbal talent also make him easily the best over-the-phone fuck that you can possibly imagine. Expertly coaxing you to ecstasy with his detailed descriptions and filthy fantasies. He’s made you cum while he’s on the other end of the line more times than you can count. Even from a distance, Dean never stops until he’s sent your pussy over the peak a good few times. 

You really honestly think he could make a fortune selling naughty audios. Ya think so? Shit. Maybe I missed my calling, Sweetness. Ummm yeah. He absolutely did. Anyone would pay a fortune to be blessed enough to get off to those staggeringly sexy words. How he can be so incredibly filthy and yet somehow sweet at the same time is a beautiful mystery to you. Ya know, I really think I should get to speak for myself here. Gotta give the full impression when my reputation for havin’ a tempting tongue’s at stake. Fair point. Have at it, Dean. Whatcha wanna hear, y/n? Hmmm? I know whatcha need, Sweetness. Come lean into my chest and lay your head back so I can say it right here in your ear and drive you a little nuts, yeah?

Wanna hear about how much I fuckin’ love your body? How I’ve never seen anything so mesmerizing? How I wanna lay you down and tie your hands above your head and work my mouth over every last inch of you until you’re beggin’ for my cock? I’m so thirsty for you, Sweetness. Mmmm. Always so fuckin’ thirsty. Wanna taste your sweet pussy and run my hands over your gorgeous curves and pull you apart, piece by piece, until the only thing left in that pretty little head of yours is how crazy, intensely, unbelievably good I make you feel, y/n. He pauses his skilled seduction for a few seconds to run his hands over you and give a full, wet kiss to your neck right there below the ear he’s been murmuring sin into. And a small part of you registers that you should probably be ashamed of the fact that you’re practically panting and decidedly wet already. But the rest of you doesn’t care. At all. Not when it’s at his lips. Want some more, Sweetness? Oh, fuck yes. I think about you like this when I’m strokin’ myself, ya know. About you – all strung out with that same gorgeous, lust-glazed look in your adorable eyes that they’ve got in them now. And those sexy little whimpers falling from your tasty, perfect, pillow-soft lips. Your blissed out brain lost to anything but the dizzying pleasure I’m givin’ you. Desperate for my fingers, or my mouth, or my big, thick cock. Fuck, and I wanna give ‘em to ya, Sweetness. You want that? Want me to make you feel too fuckin’ good for words? Oh fuck. Please, Dean. Mmmm, fuck. That’s it. I love it when you beg like that, y/n. Fuck. Can you feel me against your ass, Sweetness? Makes me so damn steely to hear you plead for me to take you apart. Fuck, it’s so hot. Kills me when you’re so drunk on my love and my lust that you can’t do anything but surrender to your need for me, Sweetness. Do it again, yeah? Yes, Dean. Please. Please, anything you want. He starts to tease his fingers under the edge of your panties, reveling in the way you’re so exquisitely turned on by his voice and his potent praises.

Anything I want, huh? What if I wanna keep you spread out over me, just like this? Strip you down and swirl slow, sweet circles of perfect pressure over your clit until you’re so damn achy that you’re all shaky and whiny and desperately needy. You gonna be good for me? Let me play with you all night and get you high on lust and longing? Fuck. Wanna make you feel like you’re floatin’ on a cloud of carnal pleasure and you never wanna come down, Sweetness. Or maybe I wanna flip you around. Settle my hands on your hips and help you grind yourself over my thigh while I keep spinnin’ sin in your ear. Make your swollen clit so fuckin’ achy that you beg me to let you cum, right here on my thigh like a frantic whore. Fuck, it’s addictive when you’re cravin’ me that badly, y/n. Can’t get enough of it. Mmmm. Yeah, that’s what we’re gonna do.

In a flash, he has you spun around and over his thigh, face plastered with a smug smirk and hands guiding you back and forth in slow, calculated movements. That’s it, Sweetness. Feels sooo good under your pretty pussy, doesn’t it? Fuck. You’re already seconds from spiraling, aren’t ya? I can tell. That’s my girl, y/n. Always so good for me. Mmmm. But you know you’re not cummin’ yet, right? Can’t have that, Sweetness. Gonna need you to wait for when you’re wrapped around me, all full and floaty and feeling fuckin’ amazing. Gonna make you scream, Sweetness. You’re gonna be chantin’ my name whether you want to or not. I’m gonna hit that sweet spot deep up inside you that makes you fuckin’ sing. Over and over again. And I’m not stoppin’ there, y/n. We’re goin’ until you’re hopelessly spent and I finally decide to grant mercy to your poor, sore pussy so she can rest up for tomorrow. How’s that sound, Sweetness? Should I carry you to my bed and fuck you until you can’t speak? Think you can handle it? Mmmm c’mon. You know I’ll pamper the hell outta you afterwards. Yeah? Good girl, y/n. Let’s go.

@mwitsmejk @akshi8278​ @love-jackles​

[elysianslove]

shameful lust; suna rintarō

synopsis; he’s off limits in every way, but that only makes you want him more. based off of this, this, and this. the smut is inspired by my bunny anon’s birthday idea :) bunny, you know the one :)

pairings; brother’s bsf!suna rintarō x fem!reader

genre; porn with kind of plot lmfao

word count; 5.5k what the fuck??

trigger warning; age gap (not specified, & everyone’s 18+), masturbation, unprotected sex, creampie, squirting, humiliation, praise, mini panic attack, link for the lingerie (slight nsfw warning)

it started off innocent, as most things do. you were sixteen when you first felt the butterflies nestled deep in your stomach, the drop of your heart, the heat of your cheeks, only around him. you’d thought it was a natural reaction; after all, you’d known suna rintarō since, quite literally, forever, and you were a growing girl, hormones imbalanced and thoughts as confusing as ever. it was normal, completely ordinary to feel as nervous as you did whenever his hand so much brushed against yours, or whenever he’d barely glance your way to offer a small, teasing smile.

it meant nothing, of course. you were just a young girl, sixteen, desperate to lose yourself in some sort of fantasy. a silly crush on your brother’s best friend was nothing strange, and definitely inevitable.

it would go away.

you’re eighteen when the feelings don’t go away, and when they begin reshaping into more— impure thoughts. the more you see of him, the more hyperaware you grow of everything that he is. suddenly your eyes easily find the small strip of skin revealed when he stretches his arms up, and suddenly you can’t help but constantly think about the way he sits, legs spread so wide as if to... accommodate something. suddenly your thoughts always find their way back to the way he’d hugged you goodbye, arms squeezing you so tight to him, allowing you to feel every ridge and ripple of his muscles, and the way he had ruffled your hair and his hand, so large, so easily sinking into the strands— and you’re left wondering what else his fingers could do in your hair, to the rest of your body—

it’s bad. it’s really bad. every day you try and convince yourself it’s innocent, and every night you prove yourself wrong when you find yourself on your stomach, face buried in your pillow and teeth biting down on it, mouth dampening the cloth as your fingers rub harshly at your clit and sink into your dripping cunt— all with his name falling off your tongue as you heave and cry. every night you think about how much thicker his fingers are in comparison to yours, how much longer, how they’d feel inside of you, curling within you. you know he’s dexterous, insanely good with his hands. you’ve seen the way his fingers fly across a keyboard or tap urgently at a gaming console. you know it, and it in no way helps in calming your frustration.

it’s bad, of course, but you live with it. after all, he is in every way off limits. a lot older than you, and much more experienced, suna would have to lose his mind before he ever thinks of you the way you think of him. what would a girl like you have to offer a guy like him anyways? your shaky hands and clumsy mouth? your tight cunt that can barely fit two of your fingers? you’d only leave him unsatisfied, and leave yourself utterly humiliated.

worst of all, however, you can’t imagine how devastated, how betrayed, your brother would be if he’d caught you fooling around with his best friend.

so although you’re yearning to say fuck all and fuck him, you don’t, because it doesn’t make sense in the slightest for you to do so. you continue to make due with what shirtless image of him or that time he slept over and went commando, waking up at the same time you had and his — his dick was hard— you could see—

fuck.

you need to grow up.

as you sit with your back to your headboard, your knees bent up and swinging slightly, two simple knock erupt on your bedroom door. it’s late afternoon, the sun’s brightness dimming slightly, casting your room in an orange glow. in all honesty, it’s soothing.

looking up from your phone momentarily, you call out for the person knocking to come in, your eyes returning to your screen once more.

“hey.”

at the sound of the awfully familiar voice, your head snaps back up and you lock your phone, looking up with newfound excitement at the man standing at your doorway. “hi,” you return with a smile, sitting up and crossing your legs.

suna smiles back, walking into your room with one hand tucked behind his back. “your brother said i’d find you here,” he explains, walking towards you.

you quirk a brow, curiously and amusingly smiling as you ask, “whatcha got there?”

he’s quiet for a moment as he walks over to your side of the bed, maneuvering in a way that doesn’t reveal what he has hidden behind him. you twist around on your bed, leaning on your knees to face him properly, and it’s just when you lift up slightly to settle comfortably that he leans down, bends over to get close enough to whisper, “happy birthday, pretty girl.” he gives you not another moment to process how close his face is — how close his lips are to yours — before the hand behind his back comes around between you.

tucked in his hand is a medium sized bag, not related to any sort of brand, so you assume it’s a simple bag he’d gotten from a convenience store. that would really only mean one thing— that he’s gotten you more than just one gift. you can’t see what’s in it since there are colorful papers stacked within it, obstructing your view, but you’re still flustered at the mere thought he’d even considered to buy you a gift. it’s not unusual; suna, every year on your birthday, has gotten you a gift, yet it’s usually more so a gag gift than anything. some inside joke of yours, maybe he’d pay for your dinner, things like that. never a full on, thought out gift.

“you didn’t have to,” you say, settling back down on your knees and hesitantly taking the bag from him.

he waves you off, disagreeing. “course i did; you’re nineteen now.”

you roll your eyes. “wouldn’t eighteen be more special?”

“fine,” he decides, playfully taking the bag from your grasp and pulling it to him. “guess i’ll just give this to someone else then— maybe your mom—“

“suna!”

at your reaction, he laughs boisterously, and against all odds, you find yourself smiling too. quickly, you reach out for the bag again, pulling it back to you.

“open it when you’re alone,” he disclaims, almost as if in warning.

warily, you eye the bag.

“sure.”

you try to be quieter when unboxing suna’s gift, but the paper’s scrunching is just so damn loud. after cursing it out, you finally rid the bag of its first layer of paper, and are met with a scented candle and some lotion. basic, expected. there‘s a card there too, and when you open it, there’s a note in his messy handwriting, reading out a simple happy birthday— and a good couple of yens too. money, a candle, lotion.

so basic.

there’s still more paper beneath, but you don’t expect it to be for anything except decoration, not for—

what the fuck.

what the fuck.

What The Fuck?

your two hands dip into the bag, reaching out for the final gift, grabbing it by its straps and—

holy shit, he got you lingerie.

it’s so— sheer? you don’t think an inch of you will be properly covered, even with the lingerie on. it’s properly transparent, with only the intricate lace designs to modestly cover you. when you dig into the bag, you find the panties to match the bra and— well, it’s pretty, you can’t lie. there are dark, almost flowerlike designs all over, and it’s a deep black, nearly blue or green. there’s also a garter belt, but there aren’t any stockings in the bag to attach to the clips. maybe he’d expected you to take care of that?— ah no, you stand corrected. there are stockings.

fuck, he thought of everything didn’t he?

but more importantly, what the fuck does all of this mean?

burying the lingerie deep inside the bag again, and making sure to cover it up with the paper, thoroughly, you place the other gifts and the card back in and on top, before putting it aside on your bed.

and now, to gather your fucking thoughts.

you had to text him to thank him for the gift, obviously. but there was no way he’d accidentally misplaced the lingerie there. it was deliberately placed, with the way it was folded and tucked neatly, underneath an extra layer of paper above and beneath it? yeah, definitely on purpose. but— why? had he taken notice of your feelings towards him? was this his way of making fun or... reassuring you they were mutual?

god, what the hell are you thinking.

snatching your phone from your bedside table, you check the time.

2:01 a.m.

okay, everyone‘s bound to be asleep by now. hopefully. you eye the bag, so cautiously one would assume there’s some sort of killing machine within it. you contemplate. shake your head. no. the gears twist. yes.

no.

yes. no. yes. no—

fuck it, it’s yours anyways, isn’t it?

you snatch it loudly, rushing off to lock your bedroom door, then rushing to close the blinds, tightly, surely, then rushing to turn the lights off and turning the small lamp by your bedside on instead. what else are you meant to do with lingerie other than, well, put it on? it’s rational, you think, obvious.

it’s fine.

stealing one last, deep breathe, you dump the contents of the bag again, and pick out the lingerie.

it fits.

it fits perfectly.

the bra is snug against your chest, pushing at your breasts but not digging in uncomfortably. your nipples peak through what‘s revealed of the mesh, and when they stand perky and hard, you blame it on the fact that you‘re half naked. the garter belt wraps tightly around your waist, not squeezing to the point of discomfort and pain, but not loose that it’s a nuisance, and the clips that hang from it are attached to a pair of stockings that stop mid thigh, squeezing at the flesh. finally, a pair of panties rest on your cups, cupping your ass perfectly. it too is sheer, and god— you can see so much of you.

is this— what he would‘ve wanted?

you can’t deny that you do look good. it shows your figure off appealingly, and coupled with some dark lipstick, your messy hair, and the slightest smudge to your day’s eyeliner— would— would he have wanted you like this? all dolled up for him?

is this what suna likes?

doubting the fact that you’ll ever have the courage to put this set on again, you grab at your phone, clearing the area before your mirror, then sitting down at the edge of your bed. might as well enjoy it while it lasts, shouldn’t you? posing in the mirror, you appreciate the way you look, the way the dim lighting complements the atmosphere, the way the piece hugs your body and shows you off. you look so good.

so good— for him.

reveling in this surge of confidence, you snap a good amount of pictures, posing differently in each of them, taking them at different angles. your camera roll overflows with them, and as you fall back on the bed, hair splayed out on the mattress, you smile proudly at the pictures.

do you look good enough for him to see?

the thought strikes you suddenly; it tickles at the pit of your stomach, makes your knees bend and your toes curl.

should you?

the messenger app is open at the text messages between you and him before you can think, a picture of you uploaded and ready to send.

should you?

you tuck your lower lip between your teeth, mulling it over anxiously.

no, you most definitely shouldn’t.

quickly, you swipe out of the messenger app, and onto safari. porn it is.

you should‘ve turned the ac on. fuck, it’s hot.

3:10 a.m. 45 minutes since you’d put the lingerie set on and had your mini photoshoot, ten minutes since you’d started masturbating. everything’s still in place except for the garter clips, which have snapped off of your stockings at some point in the past few minutes, but you pay it barely any mind as your legs spread wider, one hand dipped beneath your panties, the other pressing hard against your mouth, trying to keep yourself quiet.

it’s not that you generally had a problem keeping down your noises. your home was constantly filled with people, and you’re almost always sexually frustrated at the most inconvenient times. this time, however, it’s different. it’s different because you’re wearing a lingerie set that suna picked out, that suna bought for you, that suna gave you himself. would he have wanted to watch you touch yourself like this, dressed up so pretty? or— would he have wanted to fuck you while—

shit, you’re gonna cum.

you let out a broken moan, bleeding into a desperate son, muffled barely your hand. your fingers fuck into your cunt faster, squelching lowly as you arch your back, pressing your palm harshly against your clit.

“ugh, hngh,” you whine, squeal, wrist aching. “fuck, rin— please—“

you’re so loud, shit, shit, shit.

beside you, your phone dings! loudly, alerting you of a message received, but you can’t stop, not when you’re so close. it dings again, and again, but you continue to ignore, chasing your own high so desperately, faster, faster, faster. the coil tightens, your body tenses, mind hazing over and eyes rolling back— so close, so fucking close.

“well aren’t you a doll.”

your eyes snap open, and you only manage one second to process who the fuck and what the fuck before your hips are trembling and twisting, and your legs are shaking so awfully as your back arches deep. the moment you hear his voice, so deep and clear, looming just by the edge of your bed where you lay spread, fucking yourself, you cum— and you’re convinced you have a humiliation kink. you didn’t cum because you’d simply been close— you came because you heard him catch you.

in your post orgasmic daze, you pant deeply, chest heaving, rising and falling rapidly as you try to catch your breath. your fingers pull back from your panties, falling to the bed, sticky and wet, while your other hand falls from from your mouth, drool and spit dripping from the corner of your lips.

“aw, you ruined the set.”

you sigh. “rin.” the way you say his name isn’t in a way that’s calling out for him, but neither are you scolding him nor brushing him off for teasing you. you’re just simply trying to process the fact that he’s here.

“i like it when you call me that,” he admits, and in a second he’s falling over you, hands bracing and steadying him beside your head, keeping himself hovering at a small distance. “why do you always insist on calling me suna?” he wonders, head tilting curiously.

blinking slowly, you breathe in, and out, and ask, “what are you doing here?”

above you, he shrugs. “you were the one that sent me those—”

immediately, you’re pushing him off you, sitting up all too quickly as you reach out for your phone. you shakily unlock it, typing in your password and opening the messenger app. he’s right— shit. you could’ve sworn you’d deleted the photo, because you’d explicitly decided just how stupid sending it would’ve been. 

well, look at you now. 

“that wasn’t— oh my god, i’m so sorry, i didn’t mean to,” you stutter, turning your body towards him once more, but avoiding his gaze, your body, only barely having just cooled down, heating up once more. 

“oh?” he tests. “was it not meant for me?” 

“no, i—“ 

he’s smiling all too wide for him to not be getting off on your embarrassment. at the thought of that, your eyes unintentionally snap up to him, to his crotch, where beneath his sweats is a bulge, and god, it’s like all those nights ago where you’d seen his dick through his sweats and he’s big, he’s so big—

“just where do you think you’re looking?” he sneers, hand all of a sudden gripping your chin, tilting your head back up and forcing you to finally, for the first time, meet his eyes. they’re dark, almost sinister, as they narrowly glare at you, begging you for explanation. 

your mind’s no longer clouded over, all pleasure dissipating from your veins, pathetic humiliation replacing it. “i’m sorry,” you mewl, eyes tearing up at the look on his face. of course he was disgusted. just as your stupid crush on him was natural, so was his reaction. “i’m sorry, please don’t tell anyone,” you beg, lower lip wobbling. 

his grip on your chin tightens as he furrows his brows. “tell anyone?” he questions. “about what?” 

had he not— heard you? 

he says your name, firmly, deeply, in a way that has you stifling your sobs and biting your bottom lip to stop its quivering. patiently, you wait for him to speak, to say anything, until finally, he asks, “do you want me to fuck you?” and your heart stops. “yeah?” he continues, his other hand reaching for your wrist, your hand, the same one that’s still sticky with the evidence of you. slowly, as he brings his lips closer to yours, fingers slipping so that he’s squishing your cheeks tightly, he leads your hand to his crotch, to where his dick is painfully hard beneath his sweats. your initial touch is featherlight, and he doesn’t fully press your hand to his clothed cock, but still, just the smallest, tiniest feel of him has the lust in your veins thrumming alive. “you think you’d look pretty—” he pauses, lips hovering by yours, eyes searching for any sign of hesitance or resistance, “sitting on my cock?” 

“i’m sorry,” you apologize again, but he swallows it by finally, finally, pressing his lips to yours. his lips are so soft, softer than you’d imagined and fantasized a thousand times over, as they press against yours, managing to pull the softest moan of surprise and pleasure from you. you’d forgotten, in your moment of shame, just how much you’d craved suna rintarō. just how often you thought about him, those same fingers gripping your chin to be buried inside of you, those pretty lips sucking on your tits and clit. “want you so bad,” you hiccup, kissing him back. “so bad.” 

he hums, amused, pulling back. licking his lips with a grin, as if tasting you, his hands leave you entirely, reaching for the hem of his shirt as he lifts it up, freeing himself of the piece of clothing. “don’t you think i know, sweetheart?” he teases, daringly. at the sight of your eyes widening, he nods with a dramatized serious expression, tutting as he adds, “so dirty, thinkin’ ‘bout me like that.” 

you whine again, hands lifting up to obstruct your face from his view as you fall back on the bed, body bouncing slightly. “stop,” you plead, not for him to pull back but for him to stop reminding you of just how wrong it is to feel the way you do. still, you spread your sticky thighs for him when he presses his hands to your knees, and you shiver at the feel of his fingers tickling at your skin. “i’m sorry.” 

“that’s okay, pretty girl,” he reassures you, faux sweetness dripping like honey off his tongue. he leans in, carefully slow, hands following the curve of his body and yours. “i want you too.” he smiles mischievously, leaning close once more. “so bad,” he mimics you, lips hovering right above yours before he kisses you once more. you want to pinch his arm for outright mocking you, because really, how infuriating can he be? but it’s impossible to want to do anything but desire him in every possible way at the moment, especially when he presses himself harder against you, hips slotting between your legs and clothed cock brushing against your dripping panties. 

“rin,” you plead, hands clawing at his back, grasping at his shoulders. god, his skin is so warm. 

“yes?” he drawls, wet lips kissing the corner of your mouth, trailing easily to your jaw, and down to your neck. patiently, he waits for you to speak. 

with a trembling voice, you ask, “be quick. please.” 

a little stunned, suna pauses his ministrations at your neck, but it’s barely for a second. because moments later, he’s grinning sinisterly into the crook of your neck, sucking hotly as he replies, “sure thing.” 

you do want to take your time. you want him to stuff his face between your legs and sink his fingers so deep inside of you. you want him to force your mouth down on him, want to bury your face in your lap till you’re choking and gagging on his cock. you want him to take his time stretching you for his cock before he sinks inside of you, letting you feel every single inch and ridge of his dick until he bottoms out. you wish. you wish. 

but you’re desperate, and needy, and frustrated, and most of all, you’re not even sure if this is real. you’re scared to blink and have him disappear all of a sudden. you’re scared to wake up with soaked panties and no gift from suna, no suna above you, hard cock pressing against your cunt, only the same suna from all these past years, the same suna you pine over at a distance, wanting but never having. 

so you whimper so quietly, “be quick,” again, because he’s still too slow for your liking.

his fingers grasp the sides of your panties, pulling as quick as he can, sliding them down your thighs, watching as the cloth rolls at the urgency as it slides past your knees, your shins, your ankles, legs lifted high up. at the final loop around your right ankle, as suna flings it off, he kisses at your ankle, gripping it tightly and using it to spread your legs. 

as your legs spread, your pussy, soaking from both your past orgasm and this unbelievable build up, spreads too, glistening and dripping for him. his eyes easily fall to it, and, with that same glint in his eyes, he grins, and licks his lips again. “wish i could have a taste,” he admits to you, shuffling closer and bending your legs closer to your chest with one hand. the other hand frantically pushes at the hem of his sweatpants, tugging it low, beneath his balls. “god, i’d have you sit on my face for hours.” 

he’s going to kill you. 

he’s going to fucking kill you. 

at his words, your cunt pulsates and clenches tightly, hole glistening as you moan. you hope he doesn’t notice, but he does, somehow, and he laughs, too fucking loud. “you liked that, hm? bet you’d look so cute,” he spurs you on, and your entire body trembles. 

you wish to say something, to find the courage to belittle him, degrade him, remind him that if you’re in the wrong for wanting this then so is he, but it’s so hard to find your voice. it’s like he’s stupefied you completely, reduced you to this dumb, wordless, horny mess. god, fuck, it’s embarrassing. you can only watch with wide, tearful eyes and quivering lips and trembling legs as he spits on his hand and fists his cock, quickly, getting himself all nice and slick for you. his cock is— he’s so big, fuck. if you’d been shocked feeling him beneath his sweats, well, your entire body’s rigid with anticipation now. 

just as promised, suna’s quick. with one hand pressing and steadying firmly at your lower stomach, right by your hip, he guides his cock to your cunt with the other, wasting no time by pushing in. no way, no way, no fucking way. 

how is he fitting? 

“ease up,” he orders sharply, forcing more of himself inside of you.

in response, you bring both hands up to your mouth, clasping them tightly above your lips. you remaining quiet is as impossible as ever, with the way he’s stretching you so wide for him, so you press down harder with your hands and throw your head back as he sinks in deeper, and deeper. 

“aren’t a good girl?” he praises sweetly, his other hand mirroring the one on your hip. he watches as you lower your head again, lifting it up slightly to look between the two of you at where he’s fully bottomed out, buried deep inside of you. “feel good?” he wonders, even if he knows the answer. your head falls back again and you nod with your eyes squeezing shut. “feel so full, yeah?”  you’re glad he’s speaking for you, because you doubt you could find your voice at the moment, even if you tried. 

you nod again instead, urgently, just as he pulls out until only his tip remains inside of you, before pressing back in quickly, thrusting into you suddenly. the sight of him above you is better than anything your mind has ever made up, hands squeezing at your hips tightly, both ensuring you keep your legs spread for him and keeping himself up, steadying himself as he fucks into you. his arms bulge and the muscles in his abdomen tighten and tense with every thrust. his chest, so flushed red; his hair, a little sweaty, a little messy; his brows, furrowed deep in concentration; his lips, wet and red, so fucking red, his tongue jutting out slightly as he picks up the pace, as he thrusts faster, harder. 

and best of all: the noises he makes. he’s shameless, fucking into you with abandon, moaning and grunting and whining for you, like he’d been the one yearning, pining, and not you. and, you suppose, with the way he’s fucking into you right now, that there might’ve been some truth in his words, that he’s wanted you just as bad, that this wasn’t some pity fuck— poor little girl, his best friend’s sister, sending him lewd and inappropriate photos because she’s so desperate, she can’t help but lust after him, every single day. 

his hands squeeze even tighter and he grunts, gritting his teeth sharply. “fuck, m’already close,” he grunts, and somehow, that makes your heart swell, pride deepening. “cunt’s so fucking tight, shit.” you’re making him say those words, you’re going to make him cum so quick, it’s you. you. 

when his hands crawl up to your breasts, squeezing and kneading through the bra, your hands fall to his forearms, gripping so tightly and digging your nails into his skin. “please, please, please, cum inside,” you beg, trying to be as quiet as you can. “please rin, please.” 

the bed creaks with the effort and speed of his thrusts, your body bouncing as his cock fucks deep into your cunt. his head bows in, smooth hair swinging forward as he curses. “are you— hm..hngh—sure?” he asks, and you nod so rapidly you feel dizzy, arching your back as much as you can to get him deeper inside of you. he’s a mess of curses and pants as he fucks you even faster, one hand remaining at your breast, grasping tightly, the other lowering to your wet clit, rubbing furiously, messily, clumsily. 

no words are exchanged as he desperately circles your clit with the rough pads of his fingers, squeezing and kneading your breast as he angles his hips, trying to get you to cum before he does. and just as as before, just as he’d caught you earlier, your body starts to tense up, shaking in anticipation as your orgasm draws closer and closer.

but there’s something— different. 

“rin!” you yell out, still half-whispering in an attempt to keep quiet. your eyes well up as you call out for him again, your orgasm unbearably close. “rin, feels weird— oh m—”

he only just barely manages to shove his hand against your face before you’re screaming, throat aching and scratching as you thrash beneath him. around his cock, your cunt spams and clenches down tightly, cum splashing and spraying all over his lower stomach and past his cock to his balls. you’re still thrashing, still squealing and screaming, and he’s spilling inside of you, filling you up impossibly, his cum splashing and dripping as it mixes with yours. 

“holy shit,” he breathlessly marvels, hips still rocking and grinding against yours as he helps the both of you ride out your highs. “you ever—“ he steals in a breath, steadying himself slightly, “—cum this hard?”

you’re sobbing, hiccuping and mewling and whining and crying, your body impossibly sensitive. tears stream freely down your cheeks as you sink into the mattress, feeling quite literally like jelly. slowly, suna pulls his cock out, trying not to get distracted by the way your cunt squeezes out some of his cum, and instead focuses on you, his hands cupping your cheeks softly. 

“hey, hey, eyes on me,” he encourages, kneeling above you as his thumbs brush at your tears. 

“m’sorry, ri— suna,” you heave, hands grasping his as your eyes water again, fresh tears joining ones that are yet to dry. 

“what for, sweet thing?” he asks gently. when you start to lift yourself up, he leans back, sitting on your bed, giving you space to get comfortable. he watches with worried eyes as you furiously rub at your eyes with your palms and the back of your hands, as the tears never stop flowing. shit, did he fuck up somehow? he calls your name again, cautiously reaching out for you. when you don’t reject his touch, his heart settles, just a little. “tell me what’s wrong?” he offers again, and you sniffle. 

“are you not disgusted?” you ask, voice wobbly and cracking. 

his brows furrow, and he cocks his head. “because you... squirted?”

you slap at his arm with a roll of your eyes. “no, suna.” 

“when did i lose my first name privileges?” he asks, dramatically shocked. again, you roll your eyes. well, at least the tears have ceased. softening slightly, suna sighs. he’s shit at this. he’s worse than shit at this. talking in general? awful. talking about his or someone else’s feelings? he’s sure the devil would be better comfort. still, he can’t just— leave you. he’s sure that would make things a thousand times worse.

and honestly, neither does he want to leave you. 

“i can’t read your mind, pretty girl,” he reminds you, and momentarily, you look away. 

until you inhale sharply, and meet his eyes again. “it’s okay...” you begin, trailing off as you attempt to gather your words, before continuing, “that i feel this way for you?” 

at your words, at the much needed clarity, suna sighs in relief. so that was it. “more than okay,” he promises you. 

you nod in understanding, before prodding further, “not weird?” 

he thinks it over, before answering. if he’s honest with himself, the most he’d felt with you was sexual attraction. he liked the way your tits bounced when you ran to greet him or the press of your ass against his crotch when you passed by him to get somewhere. he liked— he liked thinking about your body, your lips, your hands. it’s why he sent you that lingerie set, the one that sits so pretty on your body right now. not that he’d been expecting you to send him anything, and he’d even anticipated that you might feel disgusted, might throw it in his face and slap him too. but he knew you better. suna was observant. he knew more than he let on, more than anyone could imagine. if he hadn’t realized your eyes on him in the past years, he must be blind.

still, he’s not sure if it was ever more, or if it is more. but, he supposes, it’s not an unimaginable feat. he thinks that maybe, there is a chance. he likes you, sure; you make his belly twist and his heart jump. but is he going to risk leading you on? 

he doesn’t know. 

he settles for, “good weird.” 

your face is the definition of a question mark. “what the hell is good weird?” 

“your face is good weird,” he retorts. it’s a bad comeback, terrible actually, but his face is flushing a dark red, and he needs to get away. you’re flustering him and it’s pissing him off. 

“that’s so mean!” 

yeah, the devil would’ve been better comfort. he wasn’t around though, so he made sure suna had been sleeping over that night instead. 

worked in your favor didn’t it? 

end note; my godddddfhksfhbskjbsb ,,, sorry if you found mistakes this took me all day and im not assed to proofread <//3 but i hope you liked regardless!! 

[goroufucker]

did you ever love me, scaramouche ?

—

authors notes: angst, porn with angst, unhappy ending, gn reader, dancing under the stars will truly show ones true emotions..

—

the blanket below you two was warm, you had made sure everything was perfect when your boss, the 6th fatui harbinger, finally let you take him out somewhere- you washed the blanket you two were sitting on in the darkness, only illuminated by the stars and moon, to make sure it was to his comfort.

you two had,, an interesting relationship. it wasn’t quite ‘special treatment’, it was his craving towards your body. he loved the way you quivered and moaned underneath him, he couldn’t get enough of how vulnerable you were. there was never an inch of romance between those sessions, it was always fantasy and letting loose stress.

even whenever he called you filthy names and degraded you down to your core while his dick practically rearranged your organs into a brand new shape, you always took it with a smile. you had always looked up to him, even while you were still a new recruit. you took everything he had to give for months.

from the position he was sitting, scaramouche’s eyes lit up gorgeously under the starlight, having removed his hat for extra comfort whilst he was laying on his back. he seemed, bored? perhaps he isn’t quite used to dates, he most likely never could’ve had time to. though you keep your thoughts in your own mind and do you best to just relax with him.

“what was the point of taking me here?” he asked coldly, his gaze going from the moon to you, his head tilted while his hair fell almost perfectly on his face. you gulped down some spit, trying to avoid fumbling over any words. “well,, this time of night is when the stars and full moon are in perfect view, it’s a gorgeous place to take someone you care about-“ you spoke, avoiding mumbling or stuttering over your own feelings.

scaramouche’s gaze went from you, back up to the stars. his mind was occupied by the bright light, “indeed- it is quite the beautiful time..” he mumbled. thinking for a moment before sitting up, keeping a steady hand on the blanket and using it to stand up. “scara? what’s wrong?” you said, pushing your knees closer to your body.

“you said it’s a beautiful place to take someone, yet we aren’t doing anything”, scaramouche turned his head, followed by his body. “it would be a shame if we wasted the night away with idle chatter, so stand up.” he ordered, reaching his hand out, you could notice a faint pink on his cheeks- though with the shadows of the night, it was difficult to fully see.

“.. dance with me.”

the words left his mouth, you could only stare. he.. wants to dance with you? the number 6 of the fatui harbingers,, wants to dance. of course, you weren’t gonna wait to see what he’d do if you took too long. you took his hand, him helping you stand up and bringing you close to him. he took your freehand and put it on his shoulder, the hand he used to pick you up interlocked with yours. with his freehand on your waist, he pulled you in.

the soft nights breeze mixed with the illuminated sky left an indescribable feeling as you two started to move, there was no music, not even the faint sound of a lyre in the distance. you needed no music, you only needed to stare into his eyes to hear the sweet melody in your mind. scaramouche never grinned back at you, though he reciprocated the eye contact as he spun you away from him.

pulling you back in, he held your back and dipped you down. you gasped, not expecting it. his face crept closer, gently dragging his bottom lip up your neck and stopping at your jawline. then pulling you back up, your noses were almost touching as you continued to dance. your heart was thumping, as if it was about to fall and sink right down into your stomach. the grip on his shoulder tightened as you two spun.

it seemed like the nights light had become blurry, as if the stars were falling and it’s dust blew into your eyes. the tension of it all overtook your body, so much so that you didn’t even notice him leaning in. scaramouche’s lips interrupted your cloudy haze, it took force not to widen your eyes. he had never, willingly, kissed you before. scaramouche always said that you should never kiss him. you never knew why, though it hurt.

euphoria filled the night as you greedily kissed him back, filling up every bit of space between you two. it was quick though, he pulled away and took your hand, spinning you away from him again. letting go of your hand as you spun, taking a step back. you stumbled a bit, not wanting to fall and embarrass yourself.

you two stared at eachother from a distance, your eyelashes flickered while you blinked, watching him clear his throat. he seemed,, embarrassed? no, maybe uneasy.. you couldn’t get a read from his eyes. but he stared so longingly at you, you couldn’t help but be flustered. this is the most attention he’s ever truly given, being so caught up in fatui work, only spending some ‘quality time’ with you by letting the stress out his body through your body.

you almost spoke, until he finally interrupted you. your mind was still fixated in a haze, his hair was slightly messy from laying down and wearing his hat, his cheeks were flushed from how close you two where, his eyes half lidded made your body tingle and shiver. realization hit.

“i want to fuck you under the stars.”

you were in love with him.

within seconds, you ran right to him, wrapping your arms around him and pulling him into a kiss. he gripped onto you tightly and kissed back, inhaling sharply through his nose. the passion you felt at that moment drove you insane, as if you two were finally letting loose everything you had stuck inside. it was aggressive when he picked you up and put you right down onto the blanket.

wasting no time to rip off every article of clothing you had on, he wanted to see you and he wanted to see you now. you pushed away how overwhelmed you were with how fast this was going and tried to melt into the moment, listening to scara’s breathing once he had finally gotten you naked. he was staring, his hands gripped the blanket at the sides of your shoulders. embarrassment filled your mind, wanting to close your eyes to avoid his gaze- but if you were to, you’d miss everything.

the moonlight seemed to awake something within him, you realized that when he started doing things he never did before. usually it was you who gave the oral, but scara was quick to pull your hips up and dip his face right into your sex. the feeling had you tilting to ur head back, gasping and moaning at each quiver of pleasure that went up your stomach. all you could hear were the suckling sounds of scaramouche devouring you, as if he was trying to get every single drop.

the intensity of it all plus a newer feeling had you cumming faster then you normally would, already arching your back as you felt your orgasm right at its peak, just barely holding on. he was able to recognize whenever you were about to cum, due to experience. though he didn’t stop and make you beg like he would before, he went in deeper and let you have it right there. the sight of the stars filled your vision, staring into the sky as you let out a loud whimper orgasmed, not even realizing you were grinding into his mouth while you road out your high.

scaramouche pulled away in the dead middle of you riding it out, licking off any leftovers that could’ve been on his lips- he stared at your disheveled state. though he didn’t grin, he never smirked like he always did. he was silent, taking in your body and attempting to cherish it. scara pushed up and sat on his knees, unzipping his shorts and pulling them down enough to get his cock out, as well as taking of some accessories to be able to pull his shirt up enough to see his stomach.

you watched him, still panting from your orgasm. his shadow gloomed over you, his body covering the starlight from your reach. scaramouche went back to hovering over you, using a hand to adjust his junk to press right against your hole. “this… is it..” scara panted, looking into your eyes for a second. “w-what..?” you ask, confused on what he meant. though when he didn’t talk afterwards, you assume it was just sexual babble- which he did quite often.

you pushed it out of your mind quickly, feeling the tip of his cock start to press into your hole. you let out a sigh while he slowly buried his dick into you- he went until his lower stomach touched your skin, taking up any available space. your hands went from the blanket to his forearms, you wanted to feel as much of him as possible right now. he let you touch him as he started to move his hips, grinding them into you so his dick would reach the deepest parts of you.

sex was always pleasurable with him, even if it was something you weren’t too sure of trying out, scara always made it euphoric. so of course, you moaned at the pangs of pleasure that shot up your body. the slow movements he was doing were quite rare, he only was this gentle the first ever time you two had sex. the gentleness of course, didn’t last very long, as scara got aggravated- letting out a scoff before thrusting his hips at the speed he desired.

“Mm.. fuck..” he mumbled, gripping onto your hips, gently digging his nails into your skin. he always did that when he wanted you to squeeze on his cock, so you did just that. “yeah.. just like that” scaramouch panted, leaning over and moving his mouth to your neck. he bit down hard, harder then he’s ever bit before- or maybe your sensitivity to his touch right now has made it seem so aggressive.

hearing the twinges in his voice as you admired him, making sure to keep your voice clear for him to hear, you recognized him getting close to his release. you took this advantage to wrap your body around his, he had never gone raw with you like this before, he always used a condom no matter what unless it was oral. you wanted him to cum inside you, to end this euphoric night, you wanted to leave with a bit of him still with you.

scaramouche was too caught up in his high to truly care about how close you were, he fixed his posture while continuing to keep a harsh grip on your hips. the view you had was of his stomach and above, though he was thin, scara was very well built. you put your hands back on his forearms, trying to help him focus on his orgasm.

with a few more messy, aggressive thrusts, he dipped his head back as he came right into you. holding back a cry, he clenched his teeth and let out a strained groan. all you could do was admire him, his thrusting slowing down and ultimately stopping, his head dipping forewords again before locking eyes with you, the sweat dripping down his forehead. you didn’t even care that you only came once, your want to cum just completely disappeared.

before you could say anything to him, his eyes unlocked with yours and he quickly pulled his dick out of you, hearing a gentle pop and feeling his cum leak out. scaramouche shuffled around, pulling his pants back up and putting on any accessories he took off. with shaky arms, you pushed up and sat on the blanket. “scara..? why are you getting dressed so quick?” you asked, glancing at your own clothes that were scattered around the grass.

he didn’t answer you, not even a small noise to indicate he heard you. placing his hat ontop of his head, he finally turned to face you. “i told you, this is it.” scaramouche spoke, pulling the blanket you two had fucked on and wrapped it around your exposed body. “.. wait, you can’t mean that-“ you stare at him in shock, yet he doesn’t answer you again. getting on one knee, he covers your eyes with his right hand, catching you by surprise by kissing your lips one last time.

scaramouche pulled his hand away as he got up and turned away from you, walking away ever so slowly as the sun began to rise. you were left in shock, was that it? was this the end of you and his meetups? the wind blew ever so gently, your hair flowing along with each gust. his figure slowly disappeared into the sunlight, as if it had gobbled him up.

did the stars lie to you, you assumed so. as the tears spilled down your face, you knew why, and with a gentle whisper, you could only ask…

“did you love me back?”

[arty-shadow-morningstar]

A Failed Betrothal (4)

Am I doing this right? I mostly do write this when I am between the state of sleep and awareness. Hope you enjoy this.

[Masterlist]

(Part 1) (Part 3)

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PART 4

Marinette came to a dungeon cell with two other prisoners. One of them was awake and he looked vaguely familiar. The other had an ugly red helmet that didn’t help with the headache she had.

“Do you know where we are?” She asked the handsome stranger with beautiful green eyes, her throat a little dry.

Wait. Handsome?

No bad Marinette. Don’t fall for fellow prisoners, no matter how cute he looks. Oh Kwamis, she was already screwed.

He still hadn’t replied. Maybe he didn’t understand French. She tried to ask again in another language before her enhanced hearing picked up the sound of footsteps. She faked unconsciousness. Later, she heard the iron door open. She looked through the tiniest slits of her eyes she could muster while the two held a staring/glaring match. Oh shit, that’s the fame Talia Al Ghul, daughter of Ra’s, head of the League of Shadows, and the boy she was glaring at had some resemblance to her, so he must be her son, Dennis? Daniel? Damon?

"Damian, I hope you know what you should do."

Ohh..Damian. Where had she heard that name before?

"To be forcefully married to that little girl. She is no one special. Why am I getting married to her?"

Ouch, that hurts. Well, Damian, just because I forgot your name does not mean you can call me a little girl. I can also kill you very easily and painfully.

“Well, Jason, you are awake. You can be the best man for the wedding.”

“No. I don’t know what game you are playing but you better release us. B is gonna find us and you will pay. Let the girl go. She is innocent in all of this.” Red Helmet, Jason, is officially not going on her hit list for his atrocious fashion choices. But that red monstrosity still needs to go.

"Ladybug may not seem like it but she possesses great power that my father converted for centuries. Speaking of, she should be awake by now."

Marinette felt her hair being yanked. A little pain was expected but the really sharp claws digging into her scalp was not. Making her cry and tear up.

”I am so sorry, kit.” Plagg whispered in the kwami language, loosening his claws.

"Tch, See, she is more pathetic than I thought. She is not powerful." Damian growled out.

Geez, thanks for the compliment, it’s not like you ever had a tiny cat dig its claws into your scalp out of surprise. (Damian once had a kitten thrown at his head and if he knew about Plagg, he would have been sympathetic.) Marinette started begging for mercy, hoping they would buy the helpless girl out of the suit that is ill-suited for the job she had been chosen for and had no idea on how to escape.

“Like I thought, weak. She is not deserving of the title of my wife.”

Oh kwamis, what did she ever do to have such a picky groom? The more he insults her, the less she wants to be married to him.

"Appearance can be deceiving. Despite her demeanor, she is the current wielder of the Ladybug Miraculous and the Current Guardian. The old Guardian, the old fool had promised her in exchange for his protection."

Great, another reason to stop her mother from killing a senile old man.

"That doesn't mean I want to marry her. She is not worthy of an Al Ghul or a Wayne. Look at her, crying at the slightest feeling of pain."

So that’s where she heard it from. The boy was the son of the daughter of a guy who leads a secret order of assassins and a man that owns a multi-million business. How even did a billionaire meet an assassin, ends up in bed with her and lives? Something to think about for later. She quieted down her sobs, (beat that acting, Rossi) kept her voice low to hatch out a plan with Plagg in the kwami language while the mother-son duo bickered.

“Hey, Plagg before you go, you think I can do that thing, the one which your one of your past holders from Japan can do.”

“You have a lot of potential for destruction but you have not used the ring for a long time yet so I am not sure.”

“I will give it a go anyways. Nothing to lose after all. See you later, Plagg.” Marinette smiled, one that drove fear into the hearts of even the bravest of people. Plagg returned it, already loving the new Guardian before zipping out of the cell to do some scouting. Using the enhanced strength the French superheroine got from prolonged use of the Miraculous, she yanked the chains of the walls and wrapped them around Talia’s neck, cutting off her air supply.

The League of Assassins thought that they could kidnap her and get away with it. But they were no match for the daughter of Sabine Cheng, the deadly Blue Reaper. A high ranking member from the group of assassins and mercenaries called the Guild of Night, who had semi-retired. Kidnapping her was a bad move to make as it meant they had declared war on the Guild, despite the reason behind her abduction having a completely different intention.

She whispered as such to the older woman in her tight grip, making sure the League would know how much they had fucked up. After dropping the limp body, she took a deep breath and tried channeling some of her energy for what she was about to do.

Well, here goes nothing.

She breathed out on the shackles, turning it to rust.

Success!

She introduced herself as Lady and concentrated the energy from before into her hand, forming inky black orbs of destruction in order to free her fellow captives. She felt a little drained from doing magic out of the suit and tried not to show it. Plagg returned, informing her of where the Ra’s and the Pits were. She grinned at the thought of showing old Ra’s who the boss is and made sure he regretted ever messing with her. She explained about Plagg as vaguely as she can, no need to let anyone know about the miraculous than necessary. Sure her plan sounds insane but the boys don’t know who they were with.

She would worry about that curse after she got out of Nanda Parbat. Although she could probably find something in the grimoire to reverse it, she was still an amateur at magic so it was best to have a professional to take care of it. Marinette didn’t want to be with such an asshole, no matter how striking he looks in those regal robes.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Picking off the League assassins, one by one was easy especially in her transformed state. She hadn’t appraised her suit properly but from what she had seen, it wasn’t like Chat Noir’s leather get-up. She was armoured in vital areas and her colour scheme was mainly black with green accents. There were vials that were probably poisons and pouches which she decided to look at later. She still had a long braid as a tail from her brief stint as Lady Noire and she wondered why her suit was different. While hiding in a niche she found, she called the bakery via the comm in one of her various pouches.

“Hello?”

“Papa, it’s me, Marinette. Do you know where Maman is?”

“She went out of Paris, talking about how this League must pay. I think she is meeting up with several of her old friends. Are you alright, my little blossom? I know you can take care of yourself but I worry.” The relief in Tom’s voice was palpable. However, she was right and the Guild was going to war against the League. Marinette was adored by nearly everyone in the Guild due to her strangely bubbly and cheery personality in the harsh and brutal lifestyle.

“I am fine, Papa. Did Maman use the Horse to leave? And how are my friends?” She knew they might be in a panic after her disappearance.

“I think she did. I didn’t see Kalki when I went to feed the kwamis. Your friends panicked when they found out you were kidnapped. But they are fine now, mostly worried about you. Took care of some akumas and senti monsters by themselves. I think your fencer friend, Kagami, knows more about the League than she lets on.” Of course, she does. Her mother was a member of the Guild before being blinded due to a mission. Kagami and her actually first met during a reunion party of sorts.

“Thank you, Papa. Love you.”

“Love you too.”

She hung up and dialed the personal phone number her mother uses that only Marinette and her father knows about. She waited for the call to connect, trying to think of ways to stop her mother from storming into the League’s base of operation.

“Maman, it’s me. I know you want to attack the League right this minute. But I have a better plan. Can you get Tikki’s earrings from Alix? We can use them and the ring to destroy the Lazarus Pits. Make them really angry.” She peeked out of the niche she was hiding in. She had been there for a while and needed to move to gain some grounds.

“Where are you? And are you okay?” Panic and worry filled her usually composed mother’s voice.

“I am somewhere in Nanda Parbat and I am fine. I was nearly married off to Talia’s son but I am not now. I think.” Marinette replied. Better to rip that band-aid off before she showed up with her would-have-been-husband. She jumped out of the niche and looked

“Kalki, Full Gallop. Okay, we will talk about the ‘nearly married’ part later. What was this plan to destroy the Lazarus Pits?” Sabine thought she was already used to Marinette’s brand of craziness that was her normal but apparently, not.

“I am currently on my way there. Plagg said we need Tikki to get rid of them. Since the League pissed me off and by extension you and the rest of the Guild, I thought our first move against them is to destroy the Pits and a trail of bodies. By the way, can you get some cheese for Plagg?” Marinette ran through the halls, knocking out some poor sod with a whack on the head.

Silence. She thought Sabine had hung up when-

“Voyage. Alix, where are you? We need Tikki for one of Marinette’s insane plans. And Marinette, stay safe, sweety, I’ll be there in 15 minutes.”

“Bye, Maman. See you there.”

Marinette turned another corner, the last one before the path that leads to the entrance where the Lazarus Pits were. She only managed to find it with Plagg’s voice in her head, whispering directions and Tikki’s luck. Unfortunately, the luck ran out because the entrance had a lot of guards who had spotted her.

Crap.

She hoped her mother would get here soon. Thankfully, being transformed gave her a boost and would help her to hold her ground for a while.

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Damian and Red Hood followed the trail of unconscious bodies and sounds of fights, trying to find Lady. Damian was impressed at the level of her skills to defeat many of the League’s assassins although he could probably do better. They relied on his memory to find the Lazarus Pits which was their best bet to finding her as she claimed to be able to destroy them. If Lady possessed such powers, they must find out whether she is a threat to the world or not. And also break the infernal curse they have.

Red Hood was silent mostly. He made a few jabs about how kick ass his ‘bride’ was and how the current Robin should not let her get away. Damian tried really hard not to just maim his adopted brother and also ignore that little fluttering in his chest that happened every time they saw an unconscious assassin left behind by Lady. The sounds of fighting got louder as they got nearer to the entrance. They turned the final corner to see Lady fighting against the guards who outnumbered her. But she seemed to be doing fine against them. Mostly.

One had slipped through her defenses and nearly stabbed her in the back if it weren’t for Damian grabbing one of Red Hood’s guns and shooting a rubber bullet to the neck. He jumped into the fight, grabbing the fallen assassin’s sword and taking out the knife he got from his mother. Jason joined in too, not going to let the two teens have all the fun.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Thanks for the save, Al Ghul but I don’t know why you bothered when me being dead would solve your curse problem.” Lady said as the guards laid around them and they tried to catch their breath.

“It’s Wayne. I go by Wayne these days. Being an Al Ghul is not something I learned to be proud of. And as much as I don’t want this curse, your death is not worth that price.” he replied, “Although, I have to wonder why you would choose to die rather than live.”

She chuckled, “Okay, Wayne, to answer your question. Petty teenage drama makes death much more preferable. On top of that, I have responsibilities that I was practically forced into for doing one little act of kindness.” Her tone was joking but there was a touch of bitterness in it. It made Damian want to find out what caused it. Red Hood looked at her in concern. Lady went down the stairs, ignoring their reactions to her words. They followed her, not wanting to lose sight of her again.

The Lazarus Pits emitted a green glow that lit up the cave and cast strange shadows on the walls. At the edge of the glowing toxic green waters was a woman in dark blue clothing and strangely enough wearing sunglasses. Strapped to her sides were two Dao, ancient Chinese swords. She wore a vindictive expression on her face as she stood staring at the green lake, likely to kill anyone who gets in her way. Damian didn’t recognize the woman as part of the League but taking no chances, he got into a fighting stance and Hood did the same. Lady calmly approached the woman. He reached out to grab her to stop her suicidal nature when she shocked him by speaking to the blue-clad assassin in French,

“Hey, Maman, sorry I am late. I had a little trouble with the guards upstairs. You have Tikki?”

Lady’s mother rushed to hug her, “灵儿 (líng er), I am just glad you are alright. I knew you could handle yourself.”

How the hell did Lady’s mother get to the Lazarus Pits faster than them and snuck past several vigilant guards? Before Damian could question further, a red blur appeared and went to Lady’s face, hugging her cheek. It appeared to be the same size as Plagg but was red, looked like a bug and had a black dot on its forehead.

“Oh, Marinette, you are alright. I was so worried when your mother showed up, saying you were kidnapped and needed my earrings to escape.” Unlike Plagg’s nasally voice, her voice was sweet and shrill.

So, my bride’s name is Marinette. Such a unique name for an intriguing girl.

Wait what?

Wayne, stop thinking such ridiculous notions. That is probably the curse working. Resist against it. He will not be ensnared in the traps of such magic. He hoped that the curse will be reversed before he turns and act like those fools in Grayson’s idiotic shows or Todd’s ‘secret’ romance novels.

“I am fine now. See,” reassured Lady, “We actually need you and Plagg to reverse the Lazarus Pits to what it was before someone made the wish that resulted in them in the first place. Oh, I almost forgot. Plagg, claws in.”

Green light flashed, leaving Lady in her wedding robes (which actually flatter her body. Shit. Think of something else. Drake with a smug superior smile that needs to be wiped off his face. Grayson and his plans for ‘family bonding’) and Plagg to reappear.

“Cheese.” whined the cat-like kwami(?) to which the older woman held out a brown bag that smelled and made Plagg perk up in delight. He proceeded to open the bag, taking out a slice of stinky cheese, muttering about the greatness of camembert.

Todd cleared his throat and asked in English, “Umm...Pixie as much as your reunion is touching. Who’s the new lady?”

“Oh Right, sorry. Well, Red Hood, this is my mother, the Blue Reaper of the Guild of Night. Maman, this is Red Hood and the one next to him is my husband-to-be and Talia’s Spawn, Damian Wayne.”

Lady introduced them, also in English. Damian stilled in fear, recognizing the name. The Blue Reaper nearly became his mother-in-law. She was famous for her efficiency and ruthlessness. And gained her nickname from the blue clothing she often wore as she killed her targets. His eyes also widened at how his grandfather had gone a little too far now by kidnapping the Reaper’s daughter. There were other organizations that could possibly take down the League if it weren’t for the somewhat truce between Ra’s and the other leaders. The Guild was one of them and having the Lazarus Pits to revive their soldiers made the League a little more powerful. But if what the mother-daughter duo were planning succeeded, then the League was going to have one of its most deadly wars in its history and would probably never recover from.

“Tikki, Plagg, you guys ready?” asked Lady.

“Yes, Guardian.” They both replied and emitted a blinding red and green light which Damian shielded his eyes from. When it died down, the Lazarus Pits no longer glowed a toxic green and looked… like normal hot spring water.

“Oh. I wished I could see Ra’s face when he finds out.” Lady laughed. Plagg and Todd joined in.

“Pixie, I am beginning to like you.”

“Voyage. That being said, it’s time to go home, Marinette. Your father must be worried sick about us by now. I hope you boys can find your own way back.” A portal opened up, showing a cozy living room. Damian grabbed Lady’s wrist as she moved towards it.

“Wait, let us come with you. We need to contact someone to get rid of the curse on both of us. And we can also call our father to send us tickets for a ride home wherever you live.”

“Curse? Marinette, you never mentioned a curse in your call.” Blue Reaper said, raising her eyebrow.

“I will explain later. They can come with us and I am pretty sure Ra’s knows that we have escaped by now.” Lady grabbed the two brothers and dragged them through the portal.

She then threw herself onto the couch after releasing her hold on them and the two pocket gods went to comfort her after her ordeal. The Blue Reaper stood where the other portal was and fed a floating tiny gray horse, that must be the same species as Tikki or Plagg, some sugarcubes.

“You boys must be tired but the showers are upstairs and we might have some clothes your size. Dinner will be ready in an hour. You can stay the night if you want. Welcome to Paris.”

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Tag list: @alysrose-starchild, @buginetye, @lookatthestars1, @blackroserelina, @macncheesemonster, @mochinek0, @myazael, @tonicxworld, @thewitchwhowaited, @t1dwarrior-of-earth, @kissa-chan, @iwantasecretidentity, @theymakeupfairies, @user00000003, @woe-is-me0, @kashlyn, @mochegato,@moonlightstar64 , @greatcatblaze, @moongoddesskiana, @tazanna-blythe. @tonicxworld, @toodaloo-kangaroo, @frieddonutsweets, @local-witch-of-mn, @lady-bee-fechin, @iglowinggemma28, @indecisive-mess-named-me, @k-tea-and-coffee, @jayjayspixiepop, @all-mights-asscheeks, @idk-j-go-with-it , @loysydark, @thenillabean, @lolieg, @zalladane, @silvergold-swirl

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(Part 5)

[kenmaskitten10]

Dilf Deku Headcanons

Midoriya Izuku x GN!Reader

warnings: swearing, NSFW themes (nothing graphic just briefly mentioned),brief mention of bullying/scars, idk this is pretty tame nothing is really described... if u don't like dilfs then don't read this :)

a/n: okay! this is my first time writing/publishing anything on Tumblr so please go easy on me haha... I've had ridiculous Deku brain rot lately and I decided I had to jot a few thoughts down. I'm playing with the idea of turning this into a writing blog, but I am undecided! If anyone wants to thirst for one Izuku Midoriya please come talk to me please anyway without further ado here are some Dilf!Deku hcs.... I'm playing around with doing a NSFW version after this so if you would like to see that let me know!

w/c: 1,498

Okay everyone today I want to talk about Dilf!Izuku

This may be controversial but I personally believe that he has the most Dilf potential out of any of the class 1A boys and no I will not be taking criticism at this time

Sorry but even when he’s younger he has Dilf energy - he’s caring, considerate, takes your feelings into account like a dad he just wants to take care of his baby

oh fuck this man no no no

And listen, here me out on this one….. he has more dilf potential than Bakugo and allow me to tell you why

We can all agree that Bakugo has been confident his entire life, so of course he’s going to be confident when he’s older?? duh

But IZUKU is a different story altogether, he’s never felt confident in his life

His whole childhood he was looked down on for being quirkless, and bullied by someone he thought was his friend kachaan

THEN he got a quirk but oh every time he uses it it breaks all his fucking bones and leaves him with all these scars, and he appreciates them because of what they represent but also he’s young when he gets them, he’s already prone to insecurity and when he’s younger ESPECIALLY i think they just remind him of previous failures

He only started to gain a little bit of confidence in his UA days, but it takes time to rebuild yourself after you’ve been torn down for so long, so I honestly imagine he doesn’t even feel an inkling of confidence until his third year or later and even then, it’s new, it’s unfamiliar, he doesn’t totally know how to act

Because yes, by his third year, he’s starting to realize, oh wow okay, I have an incredible quirk and all these new abilities that I can control better, and wow people are paying attention for good reasons , because he’s tall and attractive, probably cuts his hair undercut Izuku supremacy and he’s made some solid friends who help boost his confidence too

But despite all this, deep down he still feels like that quirkless little kid who has to work three times as hard as anyone else and still doesn’t get the recognition he deserves

But OH BOY

DILF IZUKU??? This man is dripping with confidence

he’s older now. he’s overcome a lot. he’s gone to therapy, and worked his way through the pro hero ranks until he earned his number one spot fair and square, that’s something no one can take away from him

He’s loaded now (see below because I go on a whole tangent), he has nice tasteful style that can only come with age and experience

He knows he’s hot now, because its simply no longer something that can be denied, anyone with eyes can see how attractive he is

If he catches you staring at him, he doesn’t shy away. His cheeks might tint slightly, but he stares right back with the biggest smirk on his face. “See something you like, angel?”

Probably finds reasons to show off slightly but he’s Dilf!Izuku so it’s subtle, it’s meant just for you and god does it drive you crazy

The way he’ll reach for and grab at things when he’s around you because he knows you like his hands (he wants to hold your bags and please let him he just wants to feel needed)

They way he stands behind you while you cook, or work, or read…. He sees you sitting or standing so peacefully and he’ll come up behind you to check out what it is you’re doing. He’ll lean down slowly, quietly, stopping when his breath is on your neck and your nose is filled with his scent, and take a quick peek at whatever it is you’re working on. It takes you a moment to turn around, your heart starting to beat faster in your chest due to his looming presence behind you (I DON’T KNOW WHY THIS IS HOT TO ME IT JUST IS OKAY). When you finally turn to face him, his face breaks into a small smile of victory as his strong hand catches your jaw in a gentle grip and he places an achingly soft kiss to your lips before saying “You look so cute when you’re concentrating,”. As you’re about to go in for another, he lets you go and stands up again, his eyes twinkling. “No no, you’re working so hard baby, don’t let me distract you,” WHEN ALL HE WANTED WAS TO DISTRACT YOU and he succeeded and now you’re all hot and bothered, with no hope of resuming what you were doing

Dilf Deku is a tease I know he is but it’s okay he’ll make it up to you later ;)

He’s got shorter, slightly more cropped hair with grey mixed in with the green, his face more lean and angular… not to mention years of pro hero work have toned his body into an absolute work of art I’m gonna pass out just thinking about it

Freckles splashed across his skin like hundreds of little constellations, accented by scars and marks from old wounds (which he’s come to appreciate - they show how hard he’s worked, how much he’s sacrificed to get to where he is now) he’s muscular but I don’t think he’s quite as big as All Might (his fighting style is a lot different so of course he would build muscle in different places) so this means LEGS LEGS LEGS

LEG MUSCLES FOR DAYS

THICK FUCKING THIGHS oh my god

And holy shit his back muscles too WHEW sometimes in the morning when he gets up before you, you watch him sit on the edge of the bed and flex his shoulders and arms to stretch out in the hazy morning light and Jesus Christ

Dilf Deku is older now, he’s spent his entire life working himself too hard and he missed out on a lot of the fun, impulsive, chaotic things young people do, so I think he wants to let loose a little in his older age, have some fun for once

And what’s more perfect than sweet, youthful, tantalizing little you to indulge in ?

He’s so doting, just wants to make you feel special and cared for

And on that note, if you will indulge me for a moment

he’s fucking RICH like

He’s the number one pro hero, he has brand deals on brand deals on brand deals

And I don’t mean to slander All Might and Endeavor, but in terms of a hot, fuckable number one pro hero, Deku has them beat by a landslide so I imagine he has a wider range of brand deals too, because he can sell the sex appeal angle

I mean can you imagine him in interviews? Interacting with fans? Confident yes, but still soft spoken and kind, almost gentle but anyone can tell he’s completely in control, of himself, of the interview, of the audience, this man has the entire country world wrapped around his little finger

All this to say he’s DRIPPING WITH MONEY

he’s like the guy that overtips an OBSCENE amount like if the waiter is really nice he’ll tip like $300 dollars and won’t even blink (I know they don’t tip at restaurants in Japan but this is more for vibes yk)

sugar daddy deku isn’t a stretch it’s a REALITY

Y’all can be officially together or not, either way Deku loves to spoil his precious little y/n

All you have to do is smile sweetly and ask, and he’s absolute putty in your hands

Complies with even the most egregious of your demands, because hey, he has the money to spare, and how could he say no when you look so cute asking so politely?

GOOD TASTE too like he has a lot of money but he knows how to spend it 😏

Additionally he’s, ya know, him, so he’s insanely charitable and donates to charities, go fund me, personal Venmo accounts of fans that need it

if a fan has like a go fund me for some reason that catches his eye, he’s going to donate and he’s going to donate a lot (A LOT)

he doesn’t even do it for the press, he does it bc he’s a good person but my GOD the press eats it up and so do the fans

These hc’s are so self indulgent but all this to say

Dilf!Deku gets what he wants when he wants it and no one is standing in his way

So when he decides it’s you he wants? Well then it’s you he’s going to get!

[thefanficmonster]

My Kind

Corpse Husband x Reader (Female)

Warning: Swearing

Genre: Fluff, RPF (Real Person Fic)

Summary: Having been chosen by the gang to be a guest streamer on today’s stream of Among Us, it’s safe to say Y/N’s super excited but also a bit nervous. The whole of her anxiety gets lifted off her when she meets someone with the exact same vibe as hers - yeah you guessed it.

Requested by @monizzle96 Hi dear! Thank you so much for your wonderful request! I’m so terribly sorry it’s taken me so long to write and post it but here it finally is! I hope you come across it and read it and if so I hope you enjoy it! Love, Vy ❤

This has to be the fiftieth time I’ve checked my setup in the past twenty four hours. But no, I’m definitely not nervous, what are you talking about. Pshhh. Nah, being nervous isn’t in my brand. Plus, what do I have to make me nervous - a group of famous streamers inviting me onto their stream to play Among Us with them because they enjoyed my own streams? Ok yeah, that’s a pretty good reason. Not gonna lie, I almost chucked my phone out of excitement when I received that DM from Toast, telling me they’d picked me to be their guest streamer for today’s date. My stomach was doing somersaults for a good forty-eight hours following that text and then the anxiety slowly started setting in fueled by the expectations they probably have of me.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not inexperienced in the streaming field, I’ve been a streamer longer than some of the members of Toast’s streamer gang actually. But I never managed to garner that big of a following which I’m honestly quite ok with. I have a modest - ok, maybe larger than modest - following consisting of incredibly loyal fans which I will never stop being grateful for. They are all so respectable of me, my privacy and my boundaries. They know the main rules: no shit-talking in the chat or in any of my comment sections, no bashing other YouTubers in my comments/chat, and most definitely not asking for a face reveal. Fun fact: I didn’t even set up that last rule, they all just collectively know not to ask for it. 

I’ve been keeping my brand pretty low-key to avoid garnering some unwanted attention - some of which I’ve already experienced on certain social media platforms following the full body pictures I posted on there - face not visible of course. I tend to also have my webcam on, facing towards my hands working away on the keyboard sometimes when I stream. I don’t know why people obsess over faceless content creators’ hands, but I appreciate the enthusiasm - it also drives me to do a manicure every now and then which ain’t so bad, self-care and all that you know.

Now, back to the subject of my ridiculous nervousness.

You see, it has layers.

I’m nervous of ‘preforming’ underwhelmingly and I’m nervous of what my own fans will think of the person I will become during this stream. They know me as a super chill and laid-back person, which I am by the way, but they might think I’m putting on a show if I exhibit any nervous gestures/vocabulary. I highly doubt they would, but the possibility is not letting my mind rest. And now that it’s about ten minutes till the stream starts, I’m getting doing my best to calm my nerves.

They are all just people. You know they are super chill too. Just be yourself, that’s why they invited you, because you are yourself on all your streams. They liked you for your personality, humor, maybe even your gaming skills. So chill the hell out and be yourself, damn it!

Easier thought than put into action that’s for sure.

I start my stream five minutes early just so I can vibe with my viewers for a little while before I have to meet the gang. My fans always have a way of injecting me with confidence, they remind me of where I was when I started and how far I’ve come. How much I achieved when I thought I’d be nothing and no one, someone the algorithm would simply overlook. But then they entered my life and I entered theirs and it all became much better than I ever thought it would get to be. I rarely tell myself ‘good job’ for the milestones I’ve reached or the hard work I’ve put into my content, but that’s probably cause I orient myself based on that quote from the movie Whiplash: ‘There are no two words in the English language more harmful than good job’ - simply put, I’m never satisfied with what I do and I always strive to do better. My fans, however, make sure I don’t go overboard with it - always serving as a reminder that I’ve done plenty for myself and others. And that’s what makes an amazing fandom, one I consider family.

Whoa, when did those five minutes fly by?!

Ah shit, here we go. Deep breaths, Y/N you got this.

“Hello!“ I say as I enter the Discord call, subconsciously biting my lower lip, grateful the camera isn’t capturing it. However, I make a mental note to keep my hands steady cause that’s the one part of me people can actually see and the last thing I want is for them to see how much my fingers are trembling.

“Oh hi, Y/N!“ Toast is the first one to greet me, “Welcome to the stream! Thank you so much for accepting our invitation.“

“Thank you for having me and inviting me, Toast. This is a huge deal for me. You guys are basically YouTube legends, this is unreal to me.“ I reply, cringing immediately afterwards because of my fangirl rambling. Great way to make first impressions, Y/N. Bravo.

To be fair, they already have an impression of you. Quit stressing.

Aright, you’ve got a point, me.

“Oh please, we owe all that to our fans. We’re really nothing special. All streamers are almost completely alike, we all owe where we are to the people who helped us make it there - our fans. We’re no legends.“ Toast says, bringing a small smile to my face as well as a light pink blush to my cheeks, “And from what I’ve seen, you yourself have quite the following. And your fans seem to adore you.“

“And I absolutely adore them.“ I chuckle, “They mean the world to me. They are the reason I’m here today.”

“Then we have to give them a special thank you, don’t you think?“ The teasing, familiar giggle, widens my smile - it’s Rae, “Nice to meet you, Y/N! I’m Rae, and, no cap, I’m quite a fan of your content. No joke, I binged your entire series of Resident Evil 7 as soon as I found your channel when Toast said he’d invite you.“

This rattles me a bit. I can hardly believe it - am I really receiving a compliment from an A-list name in the streaming world? My fans must be hella proud of me right now. A quick glance at my chat confirms that they indeed are. That in and of itself fills me with joy and newfound confidence.

“Oh Gosh, thank you so much Rae! That means the world to me. You’re all so sweet.“ I reply, lifting my ice cold hands to cool down my burning cheeks, my lips spread into a grin, my stomach filled with butterflies.

“Oh please, we have some real savages around here.“ A male voice, seemingly Charlie’s scoffs, “Don’t overlook us please.“

“Wait, we do?“ A deep voice, one I immediately know the owner of speaks up, “Who? How come I don’t know about that?“

I can’t help bust snort, “Nice to meet you, Corpse. Sarcasm central, I see.”

He laughs, “Just returning it to where it’s due. Nice to meet you too, Y/N. Sick Outlast series, by the way.“

Ok, wait, I have two A-list streamers complimenting my content. Ok, I’m bound to crack open a few beers to celebrate later cause OH MY GOD.

“Thanks! I’m a horror junkie so I’d be lying if I said I haven’t binge watched all your story-times. Personal favorites are the deep web ones, they fascinate me.“

“Oh, you’re one of my kind even more than I expected, huh?“ He replies, the tone of his voice changing, raising a bit due to what I can only describe as excitement and enthusiasm. “I’ve had people tell me it’s twisted, but I really like seeing the lengths to which the fucked up human mind can go to. Like, the shit I’ve read is insane! Some stories I didn’t narrate cause I would’ve probably had my video taken down, it was that messed up.“

My eyes widen, sharing the same excitement at the thought of digging deeper into this phenomenon, “Careful, Corpse, you’re walking a dangerous line of tempting me to deep-dive on Reddit in search of those exact stories.”

“No need.“ Corpse says, his tone now taking up a bit of a cocky note, “I still got them all saved, I can send them to you no problem.“

“Please do! I seriously gotta read them now. If I can’t sleep afterwards, I’m blaming you, Corpse. Just FYI.“ I say, giggling slightly, finding myself all but completely comfortable now. I wonder where all that anxiety went? 

“Blame fully taken. Given that I’m not much of a sleeper, I’ll keep you company whenever you think there’s a killer hiding in your closet or fear a red room pop-up will appear on your computer screen.“ He replies, chuckling.

“Um, that’s oddly specific.“ Charlie comments, “Been there yourself, buddy?”

“Perhaps.“ Corpse wheezes, getting a laugh out of me too, “I will neither confirm nor deny.“

“You know what, I’ll just private message you my number so if you see it call you at some ungodly hour, you don’t freak the fuck out. Sounds good?“ I ask, already prepping to type it out and send it to him. 

“Perfect. Wait...“ he pauses for a second, sounding puzzled for a second, “You don’t have mine.“

“Oh, do I not?“ I reply with a sinister tone - thought to answer the question, I of course don’t have his number.

“Oh, do you?“ He sasses me right back. “If so then you don’t need me to send it to you. Cool.“

Ah, shit

“Wait, no! I-I need to confirm it’s the correct one!“

Damn, never did I think I’d be complimented by some of the most important streamers on this platform, but to get a number of theirs too? That’s a whole another level that will take me time to process. But I’ll do that another time, right now, I have to kick these people’s butts in Among Us and later I have some deep web stories to read.

Turns out, all it takes to get comfortable in a new surrounding is someone of your kind. And Corpse is definitely one of my kind.

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