#He gets the plain name! How unfair!

[sysig]

You don’t get to pick your own nickname, Spamton, that’s like the whole point (Patreon)

[sukirichi]

[ DUSK ‘TILL DAWN : 011 ]

“we who bear the burden of the crown do not need to love. you only need to stay here, with me, in power, in greed, in lust – in victory.”

cw. 18+.modern royal au. infidelity. angst. reader is confused with her feelings. toxic characters. toxic relationships. smut. unedited. implied dub-con. smoking. getting drunk. physical violence.

notes. @sunasbabie bullied me into updating so here it is. alsoo the start of suna’s downfall arc???

wc. 11.8k

series masterlist 

[ ELEVEN ] I care, I care, I care like perfume that you wear, I linger all the time, watchin’, hidden in plain sight. ooh I try, I try, I try, but it takes over my life. I see you everywhere, the sweetest torture one could bear

Rintaro had known from a very young age he was different.

He had brothers, quite a number of them, and yet even when everyone had their own maids and butlers, Rintaro stuck out like a sore thumb. For one, they were strictly not allowed to call him by his name. He was never Rintaro – always His Highness or Crown Prince. He was never allowed to play with his brothers, either, despite being close in age to most of them. Instead, he stood watching from the windows of his study as they frolicked and lived like normal boys. They attended school, played sports, made friends – the normal way of living, even for Princes. But Rintaro wasn’t like that. Her Majesty had different expectations for him. That because he was the only son of the King and Queen, he simply had to be better than the rest.

No, he had to be the best, and he believed it at some point.

Until Her Majesty announced it was about time he learned some ‘proper socializing’ into society. She’d enrolled him in the same private academy as his brothers, got chauffeured to and fro, and was expected to give nothing but the best of grades when he returned. It sounded simple enough – study, excel, and prepare himself for the throne.

No one had warned him that high school came with other unexpected surprises, one that came in the form of a brown eyed beauty he’d been eyeing since his first day.

Her name was Iris – top of the class, all long, lean legs, and a mop of long, wavy hair. It was hard not to notice her. She was popular, in the way that everyone asked her for her notes, and you could trust her to whisper the correct answer when you’d been called to recite in the middle of the class. An academic overachiever, a teacher’s pet – they all had some sort of name for her. A stickler for the rules, too, always appropriately dressed and speaking in polite, clipped tones. She spoke in a manner elders would love, and Rintaro found that fact rather endearing. He wasn’t a great reader of people, but he could tell one thing: Iris was not her true self.

Her smile might be respectful, but something about the way her lips twitched when being told what to do gave him an idea that perhaps she wasn’t as obedient as she made herself to be. And she was always helping others, putting others before herself, but she never did it looking satisfied.

Rather, it seemed that her actions always stemmed from one thing: obligation.

Iris was not who she is because it was her, down to her nature, but because she felt she had to be. It was such a quality Rintaro resonated with. To deny oneself, and to put duty and order first. They both walked with stiffness in their shoulders, with the weight of the world on their heads. They were simply too young to be caring about such. And Rintaro found it unfair – how they’d been deprived of their right to normalcy and had a future they never even wanted shoved down their throats. He couldn’t speak entirely for her, of course.

They had entirely different backgrounds – with Iris as a foreign scholar, who had to work twice as hard to prove she was worthy as any local, and then there was Rintaro, who couldn’t really tell which parts of him were himself, or fabricated by the throne.

They were both young people who lied to themselves. And strangely enough, he found comfort in that. He found comfort in her. He felt less alone when she was around, and she’d definitely made her presence known. Whether it be slipping notes into his desk and walking away without a word, or sharing her milkbread with him during lunch – which he found hilarious, yet cute – or when she simply made the effort to get to know him.

Not the Crown Prince, but Rintaro.

She began to ask things about himself that he’d never thought of before. Like what his favorite food was – he blanked out, because he wasn’t supposed to be picky with food, so he just ate anything. Or what his favorite game was, and sometimes, she’d even asked him to teach her, even if bringing cell phones in class were prohibited.

She made him feel like a real person. She didn’t treat him specially; she didn’t swoon or fall to her feet when he entered a room. She spoke to him normally, treated him like a friend when no one would dare call him as such.

To her, he was just Rintaro. He could just be. And before he’d realized it, he began to look for her – in the hallways, watching her talk to her friends, or being curious on what snacks she brought so he could buy some for her next time, or intentionally trying to get partnered with her on any project.

But he hadn’t fallen for her.

Not until that day they’d rain poured over them unexpectedly, and they retreated under the nearest tree. Class had long been dismissed, and pretty much everyone had left – save for the two of them due to a late tutoring session. Rintaro struggled with English, but Iris was great at everything. And it was also a good excuse to spend more time together.

“You know, you’re different from what I expected,” Iris spoke, tilting her head up to catch some raindrops falling from the leaves with the tip of her finger. “When they said the Crown Prince was going to attend class, I figured you would be more… uptight. Strict. Or, you know, perhaps more arrogant than your brother.”

Rintaro fought the urge what she thought of him now. He’d become curious about it lately, unhealthily so. He wanted her to like him, to think positively of him – to be more than just ‘handsome’ or ‘charming’ or ‘regal.’ Because he most definitely wasn’t regal around her. He could be more himself, which is why he slouched, learned to smoke, longed for a tattoo, and even learned how to curse. Because he wasn’t Crown Prince Rintaro. He was just a normal high school student, Rin. Rin who stood under a tree while rain poured heavily against the pavement, next to a pretty girl who wore strawberry flavored chapstick and introduced him to a world he never imagined he could be part of.

If she had said he was regal, and well-mannered, he would’ve taken offense. But he didn’t ask, turning his gaze away from the way Iris leaned back against the damp tree and pulled out a cigarette. Even the way she smoked had him fascinated because it meant as a sign of trust to him.

The good, perfect student Iris was no longer perfect around him. She trusted him enough to let her guard down, and reveal her flaws. She had no need to impress him. In return, it made him want to impress her by mimicking her habits – even if he would’ve never dared doing them before.

“I have a lot of arrogant brothers. Which one are you talking about?”

“The ridiculously tall and talkative brunette in our year.”

“Tooru,” he said, gladly accepting when she offered him a stick. He didn’t light it though, because he was on his way home and didn’t want to reek of smoke. Well, if he was to be completely honest, he hated smoking. He didn’t like the way it burned his throat and made it itchy. But Iris smoked often, and she revealed more about herself each time she did, so he joined her. Everything he did was for her.

“Iris, why do you speak so casually to me?”

She shrugged and puffed out a smoky breath. “You just looked lonely. And everyone treats you like you’re fragile – always stumbling over their words or being excessively polite. I can tell it makes you uncomfortable, so… But if you truly mind, I can stick to the formalities. I just thought you might want someone to treat you like a normal person.”

“No, I-I don’t mind,” he reassured, “I like that you speak to me normally.”

“So, friends?”

He chuckled at that, and he didn’t stop her when she took out her lighter and lit her cigarette for him. He supposed one couldn’t hurt. “We have been friends for months now.”

“I know,” she beamed, “I’m just waiting to be invited over to your fancy Palace for tea parties.”

“I don’t even like tea.”

“Shame. I would’ve killed for some expensive drinks.”

And so their unexpected friendship began until they were practically attached to the hip. Wherever Iris went, Rintaro followed. She’d started calling him ‘Rin’ too, and Rin had to hide how much he liked it. He blushed madly each time he did, and it didn’t help that Iris had become more physically comfortable with him – locking arms together when they walked in the hallway, absentmindedly brushing his bangs back during their tutoring sessions, or laying on his lap when she had a book to read as they hid in the corner of the library. Each touch of her skin against his sent heat to his groin. It embarrassed him, because he wasn’t supposed to be thinking about his ‘friend’ like that, but could you blame him? He was a growing teenager. He wasn’t immune to a pretty girl’s subtle touches.

“You know, you can make it less obvious that you’re staring at the scholar.”

Glancing away from Iris playing volleyball with her friends, Rintaro glared at his brother. He shared classes with Tooru, but otherwise barely spoke to him. Tooru was too loud and confident; a little flashy for his liking. He also basked in the attention he received from the girls, shamelessly flirting with them and getting their hopes up.

Rintaro thought he was an ass.

“Shut up.”

“Well, well, can you believe that? I believe the Crown Prince just uttered a vulgar phrase that would surely displease Her Majesty. I wonder if she’ll ground you tonight for being such a naughty Prince.”

Rintaro glared at him, gesturing to Tooru’s childhood friend lurking in the corner. “Don’t you have anything better to do? Like reject that poor girl showering you with gifts again?”

Tooru sighed, and upon seeing Maiko’s face light up when he looked her way, he bid his farewell. “Don’t remind me.”

His brother suddenly disappeared. He almost felt bad for Maiko, the heiress from the Rai Clan. She grew up having multiple play dates with Tooru, and they’d been close all the way to middle school when she grew a crush on him – a crush nearly bordering on obsession. When she invited him over to play with her new puppy around the ninth grade, Tooru was met with a ten feet portrait of him in her bedroom. Tooru hadn’t spoken to her ever since. But the poor girl was too innocent to understand his rejections, and she kept following him like a lost puppy.

Not that Rintaro was concerned. Neither was his brother concerned with him, anyway, so they stayed out of each other’s way until they graduated.

Sometimes, Rintaro still wished he never graduated at all. Maybe Iris wouldn’t have disappeared, then. She didn’t have a phone, so they couldn’t keep in contact, but even if she did have a phone, Rintaro wouldn’t be allowed to be casually conversing with ‘commoners.’ Her Majesty would hate it. And he wasn’t certain where she went. Perhaps university, but last he’d heard, Iris was occupied with dealing with some family matters, and Rintaro stopped prying. Her family was one of the things Iris never spoke of. But from what little he knew, she only had a loving mother who did her very best to raise her alone.

Rintaro would’ve never expected that when they saw each other again, they would run into one another at the Palace, of all places. “Iris?” he couldn’t believe his eyes. Had he missed her so much he was beginning to hallucinate? “I don’t understand. What are you doing here?”

Iris looked like a deer caught in headlights.

He almost couldn’t recognize her. It’d been years since he last saw her and spoke with her, but she seemed entirely different now. She’d gone back to speaking in those forced, clipped tones, her posture perfect, and her smile a little stiff for it to be genuine. She’d been lying again to herself and to the world, but he couldn’t understand why. Rintaro still found it hard to believe that she stood in front of him, draped in lace dresses with the Royal emblem pinned to her right breast in the way royals did.

In the way he did.

“Your Highness,” she said, her tone sweet and airy, as she curtsied. Rintaro felt his stomach twist. This wasn’t the Iris he’d liked for so long. Iris didn’t speak sweetly, or said her words like she treaded on air and had that breathy, ridiculously feminine laugh. Iris’ voice was raspy from constant smoking, and when she spoke, it was always carefree. She never called him by his official title before, so why was she doing it now?

Rintaro couldn’t shake the feeling he was being betrayed.

“You mustn’t have been informed. I’m…”

“Do you serve the crown now?”

“No, no! Not quite in that way,” she smiled, tucking a piece of hair behind her ear. It was then he noticed the ring sitting on her finger. “I was married to your brother last night, my Prince.”

“Which brother?”

“Prince Kiyoomi.”

He felt like his world had been crushed.

He was never a hopeless romantic, but he was learning. She’d taught him what girls liked. And he… he thought she liked him, too. She must have, right? If she didn’t, she wouldn’t be staring at his lips when he talked. If she didn’t, she wouldn’t hold his hand and rub circles along his knuckles when they were alone together in the library. Or had he just fooled himself all this time? Was he really nothing but a friend to her?

Rintaro felt foolish all over again.

He felt like he was seven years old once more, holding back his tears while Her Majesty lashed at the backs of his thighs because he wasn’t able to memorize a clause from the Royal Acts and Commands. He heard the word ‘stupid, idiotic, slow,’ and ‘foolish’ resonating at the study room again, while his tutor shook his head in disappointment. Taking a step back, Rintaro released a shuddering breath. He wanted to give her the benefit of the doubt. Surely, she wouldn’t befriend him just to make a fool out of him, but if she did… she would pay. He was the Crown Prince. He would become King. He would punish her, humiliate her and put her in her place if she treated him cruelly – but nothing could have prepared him for Iris stepping forwards, eyes drooping with sultriness as her palms flattened against his chest.

Stepping on her tiptoes, she pressed her lips to his.

“But I wish it had been you.”

When she kissed him for the first time, Rintaro knew one thing for certain – she had ruined him for anyone else.

Rintaro isn’t a man quick to anger, but he was getting there.

To leave him for a trip with another man was one thing, but to completely leave him on radio silence was another. A whole week you’ve been gone and not once had you texted. No calls, no voicemails, not even an e-mail. He felt like he had no wife, and quite frankly, your determination to pretend he didn’t exist was getting on his nerves. What had he done wrong, anyway? Hadn’t he been sweet to you before you left? He wasn’t going to deny he made mistakes, but he was putting effort into making it all better. He hadn’t spoken to Iris when you were around. He ignored her, and avoided her even when you weren’t in the same room. And he fucking hated it – because why did you make him feel like he was a cheater when he loved her first?

And now, you were messing with his head. He was certain you were.

Apart from some photographs the paparazzi took of you shopping with Kanami, or sharing lunch with her or having coffee dates, he hadn’t seen you with Kiyoomi. He hadn’t the smallest clue what you were doing. Were you sleeping well? Better without him, maybe? Did you miss him, too, or were you just glad to finally be away from him?

He was going insane with every passing second you didn’t speak to him.

“You’ve been unusually quiet.”

Iris’ voice flittering through the loud noise of the music snapped him back to the present. Right. He was at a party attended by celebrities and models, with liquor in red cups and suspicious leaves and powder being passed to one another – the type of parties a Crown Prince shouldn’t be seen at. But the twins had insisted, claiming he should enjoy himself and ‘do whatever the fuck he wants’ since he didn’t have a wife around to criticize him. He thought it was stupid. He didn’t want to do anything to upset you, but Iris wanted to come along out of boredom – Kiyoomi was away fulfilling their duties for them as mediator between two countries, so she had nothing better to do. Besides, Rintaro figured Iris had been itching for these environments. She’d played the docile and agreeable Princess role for several years now. She must be tired of it, and as soon as she saw the opportunity to let loose and be her true self, she wouldn’t dare let it pass.

And maybe his brothers were right. There was nothing wrong with just taking some time for himself. If you could do it, why couldn’t he?

However, he couldn’t convince himself he enjoyed this party he was in. People were making out at dark corners of the hall, and he was pretty sure there were illegal activities happening tonight. Iris didn’t bat an eye on it. The twins, too, seemed to be enjoying themselves as they flirted with a model he’d seen before, but couldn’t care enough to remember the name of.

“Sorry,” Rintaro said, “I just have a lot on my mind these days.”

“Is it her? You can’t stop looking at your phone.”

Grimacing, he offered her an apologetic smile. Iris didn’t look jealous, but then again, it was hard to tell under the dim lights, and not when she was hugging her fifth cup of whatever foul-smelling liquor she seemed to indulge in. But neither did he want to offend her by lying, so he slid his phone back into the pocket of his jeans and feigned disinterest. “She hasn’t texted or called since she left. I have no idea how she’s doing at all,” he glanced at her, “Has Kiyoomi texted you?”

“As if that would happen,” she chugged her drink and gestured to the doors. “Let’s go. I need some fresh air.”

They exited and walked all the way to the balcony. On their way there, Iris hugged his bicep and leant against him, causing the passing by hotel staff to eye them warily. But Iris couldn’t care less, and Rintaro leveled the staff with a warning glare. They should know better than to say anything. Tonight, the world was theirs. Iris was in his arms, as free as they could be, as free as he always hoped, and he swore he wasn’t going to think about you.

With the fresh air kissing his exposed skin, Rintaro immediately felt better. He wasn’t surrounded by the stench of alcohol anymore. He could breathe better here. Leaning against the railings, he and Iris overlooked the Kingdom of Inarizaki laying beneath their feet.

At one point in time, he promised to give all of this to the woman beside him. They’d talked about having children and raising them in the Palace. How they would make great monarchs, and they could finally be powerful while still being free. With them on top of the world, no one could tell them what to do. They could simply be themselves. But just a hundred times better, because Iris would be beside him and sharing the burden of the Crown.

At least, until Rintaro realized none of that felt right.

You were his wife. He didn’t want to share this Kingdom with anyone else but you, although there was a more worrisome voice whispering at the back of his head – Rintaro didn’t want to share you with this world. He wanted to hide you and keep you for himself. He didn’t want you anywhere Kiyoomi, or Tooru. You were his. He was yours. He’s your husband, and you his wife.

You should be the one here with him, and he should be there with you.

Did you feel the same way, too?

Iris lit up a cigarette. Before he could think better of it, he snatched one from her and she lit it up for him, just like she did when they were younger. Her brows rose at his sudden eagerness, “You haven’t smoked since you met her.”

“I didn’t want her to think I smelled.”

“What’s the change?” she teased, “No longer worried she’ll think you reek because you’re married?”

“I just need the distraction.”

“Do you miss her?”

“I’m just worried.” He gritted his teeth, not liking how all of this just felt… wrong. Iris smelled too much of the old perfume she wore when they were teenagers, and it made him nostalgic in the worst kind of possible. Like recalling a childhood memory you thought was great at the time, but growing up completely changes your perspective on it. Rintaro hated it – how he tasted bitterness at something he once craved so much. Worse, he couldn’t keep lying to himself. He didn’t know where his heart was at yet, but something was different.

He desperately wanted to see you.

“I feel like… I feel like she’s going to leave me, Iris. Something’s changed.”

“You’ve changed, Rin,” she snapped, throwing her cigarette on the ground and stomping at it. Rintaro frowned; he’d seen her do it before when they were kids, but seeing her still do it now confirmed his theory: Iris still had her mean temper. She could never hide it even under silk dresses and velvet gloves. “You haven’t been the same since the honeymoon. I feel like we left behind the old you, and the one that came back is someone I barely know.”

Rintaro couldn’t deny it even if he wanted to. She was right. He’d changed. He didn’t know why, or how, but maybe he was falling in love. Could he be? No… maybe he just missed you. Maybe he just hated the way you seemed so resigned and distant when you left.

“I’m sorry,” was all he could tell her, because Rintaro was too lost.

“Are you changing your mind about me?”

“No, no. Gods, I would never. I just – I’m confused, okay? She’s mad at me, and she just left. What if she never speaks to me again?”

“She will. She’s your wife.”

“You don’t even speak to your husband,” Rintaro argued, and Iris rolled her eyes. Once, he would’ve found her irritation appealing. But directed at him? He just felt like he was being looked down on.

“That’s different. You know, Rin, if you’ve changed your mind about me, it’s okay. I already knew before this most likely wouldn’t work out, and even if you did become King and legalized divorces, what would happen, then? I’ll be your concubine,” she sneered, as if the mere thought sickened her. “People would reduce me into nothing but a whore. I don’t want to be hated just because I wanted you.”

Rintaro pursed his lips. Sure, the title ‘concubine’ didn’t come with many good meanings. But it was all he could give her. He couldn’t imagine making her his wife. Iris had too much of a temper for that, and with all the pretending and acts she puts on, he didn’t trust her enough to treat his people right when she wielded enough power.

She wasn’t kind like you.

She wasn’t like you.

He knew all of this, had realized it just now, yet he couldn’t bring himself to just go back. Running his hands through his hair, he sighed in defeat. “I’ve already gone this far. It’s a little too late to tell me to change my mind, you know?”

“I’m just reminding you this was your choice, not mine. And don’t forget if you do legalize divorces, and Kiyoomi and I did separate, does that mean you’ll divorce her, too?”

He threw his hands up in the air, frustrated. “Why are you asking me this?”

“Because I’m not a whore, Rin. I’ve changed my mind. I no longer want to be just your sidepiece, your secret lover. I have been here with you before people even acknowledged your existence. I was here first. Don’t you think it’s unfair she gets to have you in all your glory and I can only have you in secret? Like what we feel for each other is something to be ashamed of,” tears pricked at her eyes, and Iris angrily wiped them away. Rintaro was frozen to his spot. He didn’t even feel like reaching to wipe them for her – his mind was just in a different place entirely. His exhaustion ran bone deep.

“If you want me to divorce Kiyoomi when you become King, you should divorce her too.”

“That wasn’t the plan. You said you were fine being a concubine–”

“It’s either me or her, Rin. Choose. Who will be your wife? Me or her?”

“You. It’s always going to be you.”

“Do you promise?”

“It’s just you!” he barked, surprising both himself and Iris. He’d never raised his tone with her before, yet there was no denying it – he was changing. Iris knew this, too, and Rintaro could tell by the wicked glint in her eye that she would use this against him.

Rintaro didn’t think twice before he slammed his lips to hers.

If she couldn’t be convinced with words, he would convince her with their bodies. It was how they communicated anyway – all arguments would always be resolved in the bedroom. They stumbled together back to his hotel room, lips only leaving one another’s for a brief moment to breathe, before they were clawing at each other’s clothes. She let out her rage on him by pushing him back to the bed, with her on top and ripping his shirt, uncaring of the remnants. When she kissed him, it was everything but sweet. He tasted nothing but hatred and pure anger as she shoved her tongue down his throat, and he choked, tightening his grip on her hips while she bounced.

They did not make love.

They simply shared their bodies for a lack of better things to say. He bruised her and fucked her hard enough the headboard slammed against the wall because he couldn’t say he missed you. She marked his skin with hickeys and claw marks down his back because she didn’t want to hear him say he missed you.

At talking, Rintaro and Iris lacked at.

But they spoke well enough with the violence of their bodies that by the end of the night, they both knew – Rintaro’s heart was no longer in the same room as them.

You took it with you from a thousand miles away.

Rintaro couldn’t sleep the entire night. Iris had passed out as soon as she’d satisfied herself, and after hogging the sheets all to herself, he’d given up on trying to sleep. It felt wrong to share the same bed with her, anyway. So he got up, showered, and scrolled on the latest news to look for you again. Still nothing – but apparently Itachiyama’s citizens were looking forward to you and Kiyoomi attending a movie’s premiere night.

He clutched his phone hard enough it shut off. Sighing, he leaned back against his seat on the couch, an arm draped around his arm. He’d gone past the borders of being pathetic. Now, he was just eager to see his wife again, but he had no way of communicating with you. So like the pathetic fool he was, he couldn’t stop himself from scrolling for hours when a rapid knocking banged down on his door. Frowning, he opened it, and was met with a shirtless Atsumu wrapped in nothing but a towel – his eyes bloodshot red, though he suspected, not from crying.

“‘Tsumu, what the fuck?” His brother reeked of alcohol and sex. Pinching his nose, he scanned the hallway for witnesses before opening his door wider. Atsumu scurried in without a word and plopped down on the seat, his knees bouncing repeatedly. “What’s wrong with you?”

“I… I fucked up.”

“Yeah? What’s new about that?”

“No, I mean, I really fucked up,” he groaned, his head falling to his hands. Rintaro immediately felt bad about him, Walking forwards, he crossed his arm against his chest, encouraging his brother to continue. “Listen, the party was going great, and Yuki just looked even better in person. And she was fucking funny and so perfect, man.  I couldn’t help myself. But she was flirting with ‘Samu more and I got jealous so–”

“What did you do?”

Atsumu’s Adam’s apple bounced as he swallowed. He couldn’t look Rintaro in the eye, and the latter was growing more nervous by the second. “I may have made her drink more than she can handle… and pretended to be Osamu. So she’d sleep with me.”

“You are screwed.”

“I know, I know, but she’s going to wake up soon, and I don’t know what to do. I left the room, and–”

“Okay, calm down. Where’s ‘Samu?”

“Downstairs, eating breakfast.”

“You stay right here.”

Iris chose the wrong time to wake up. She must’ve heard Atsumu’s frantic ramblings and sat up from the bed, clutching the blanket to her naked chest. Upon seeing an equally nude Atsumu, she screeched, throwing the nearest pillow at him. “‘Tsumu, get out!” Atsumu fought back by throwing a smaller pillow her way. They began bickering like small children, and it was too early for any of this. He could feel a pounding at the back of his head already.

Tired. He was just tired.

“Iris, please, just – just stay here, the both of you, okay? I’ll be back.”

At least Rintaro had Atsumu’s mess to thank. He finally had a good enough excuse to not spend another moment in that suffocating room with her – or any of them. He’d wanted to leave hours before, but Iris wouldn’t have taken it well if she woke up without him. For now, though, Rintaro had to take on the role of a responsible older brother; something he’d never done before. Taking quick strides, he swung the door open when Atsumu called out for him.

“Wait. Rin!” Rintaro paused, raising a brow at his brother, whose face had been drained of color. “I’m sorry… I just… I’m so sorry.”

“Don’t worry. We’ll fix this.”

Rintaro himself wasn’t convinced by his words. Sure, it wasn’t unheard of before that the Princes got their sexual needs satisfied without having been married. Save for a few like Wakatoshi, Keiji, Kita, and Tobio who all wanted to wait for marriage, he was a hundred percent certain his brothers had been with women before. This normally wasn’t a cause for concern. But Hiroda Yuki wasn’t just anyone. She was a model currently rising to fame, and not only was she inebriated during the act, but she’d been led to believe the man she took to bed with someone else. If she were to found out the truth, and decided to turn to the media to ruin his brothers, it’d be another issue for the throne. It didn’t affect Rintaro directly, but times were changing – people were growing restless the longer the crown sat without its King.

It was high time they chose a King, but a very few number of Princes hardly seemed eligible.

As much as he hated to admit it, he knew Ushijima was the best choice to be King. He was fair, disciplined, and followed the rules to a tee. He also had a happy, stable marriage with a respectable noble woman, and they already have a healthy son. There weren’t any arguments that Rintaro paled in comparison to him.

But that didn’t mean he would give up so easily.

He wanted the throne. He wanted everything.

Shaking those thoughts out of his head, he headed for the lobby in search of the darker haired twin. He’d think about the Crown another time. Ducking his head to hide his face, he nodded at any passing staff and hid behind corners. It was only a matter of time before Yuki woke up. That presented another problem – should they hide the truth from her and keep Atsumu safe, or tell her what had really happened and risk having Atsumu be kicked out of the Palace?

Fuck. Rintaro didn’t know what to do, but maybe Osamu would.

His brother sat at the hotel’s dining area, happily digging into his meal without a care in the world. Oh, how lucky he was to be so ignorant. Out of the twins, Osamu was the more mild-mannered one and got into less trouble, but it didn’t change the fact Osamu was often the instigator, and Atsumu the willing victim who played into his hands. The situation felt more complicated now because Rintaro was unsure. Had Osamu planned this all along? Had he known that Atsumu wanted to sleep with Yuki and left them to themselves just when the both were drunk out of their asses?

Too many questions, and he struggled to form a coherent thought. But if he were Kita, he’d have this resolved within a second.

If he were Kita, but he wasn’t. He was just plain Rintaro, who wasn’t particularly great at anything, yet had unfortunately been branded with an extravagant title he never deserved.

Pulling out a seat before him, he narrowed his eyes at his brother. It was still early in the morning, so they had enough privacy with only very few people having breakfast. No one paid them any attention as Rintaro leaned forward, his voice low and hushed.

“Where were you last night?”

“Good morning to you, too, dear brother,” quipped Osamu through a mouthful of waffles, “Lovely set of breakfast they serve here. You should try some.”

“‘Samu, I’m serious. Did you stay at the party last night?”

Osamu, the little ass, took his sweet time chewing and swallowing before he spoke. “No, I went home after ‘Tsumu went out with the model. I just came back to pick him up. I figured he’d be too drunk to drive home.”

Rintaro wanted to ask for more details. There had to be more to the story. The twins were both cunning when they wanted to be, although he doubted Osamu would do anything to intentionally harm his twin. It seemed possible, but he couldn’t be too careful. None of them could afford any defamation lest the people decided for themselves how uncontrollable and unruly the Princes are. Their father had already broken the people’s trust by having multiple sons with different women. They treaded on eggshells, even more so when Rintaro opened his mouth to speak, and was cut off by the crowd whispering around them.

He and Osamu froze. They could barely make out the words from their mumbling at this distance, but they were no fools. They could feel the eyes of everyone in the room on them. With their phones pulled out, they whispered amongst themselves and sent looks of disbelief towards the Princes. Rintaro’s heart raced as he made eye contact with his brother.

They both pulled out their phones and checked the latest news.

An article published just a few hours ago trended worldwide at number one. A photograph of Rin and Iris making love could be seen through a window, with the headline implying that they were secretly lovers all along. His heart dropped. He scrolled down to the comments, his fist turning white at the knuckles as he read them.

That’s disgusting! Wasn’t Prince Rintaro recently married? It seems like being a cheater runs in the blood, after all. He’s just like his daddy To think they did this while their spouses were away for official duty… unbelievable. Disappointed, but not surprised. Princess Iris always seemed like a skank. Never liked her. She came to give aid when there was a storm in our village once, and she kept complaining she was tired. Now she’s going around sleeping with other people’s husbands *laughing sticker* lol she sounds like a bitch Is this real?????????? This has to be fake. The Crown Prince loves his wife! Delete this post now! You’re in trouble once the Palace sees this!

Rintaro pocketed his phone. “We need to leave.”

He dragged Osamu by the arm, ignoring his brother’s complaints that he hadn’t eaten his berries yet. One glare shut him up. They had bigger things to worry about than some stupid fucking berries.

“Call Shinsuke. We need help.”

All four of them hid in Rintaro’s room until Kita arrived. It hadn’t been long, maybe less than an hour, but the wait was nerve-wracking. Thankfully, he’d brought a security team with them. The Princes were escorted out through the back doors and into their cars, although it was too late. Reporters and journalists were already swarming outside the hotel. Kita had stayed back to tell the hotel staff they were not allowed to speak of what they saw or heard during last night’s party under no circumstances. The Princes’ safety were their utmost priority. Everything would be dealt with accordingly. Just as they pulled out of the hotel’s parking, Atsumu informed Kita about Yuki, and the situation he left her in.

Shinsuke’s lips thinned. Already, he looked bone tired. Waving a hand, he dismissed his brothers and promised he’d take care of her once she woke up. For now, they had to stay low and keep out of the public’s eye until the situation died down.

“You all best behave when you get back,” Shinsuke warned, “Her Majesty is furious.”

Of that, he had no doubt. Her Majesty had been eerily quiet since everyone’s return from the honeymoon. But Suna knew his mother better than anyone; she wasn’t letting things pass by, she was only watching from the sidelines, waiting to see who would drop the ball first. And to no one’s surprise, it would be Rintaro.

Her Majesty was right. He couldn’t keep this secret affair with Iris forever.

One way or another, the truth would be revealed, and the truth itself would be his damnation.

None of them uttered a word as they sat next to each other in the car. Atsumu’s still bouncing his leg, causing the seat to shake, but Osamu could care less. He simply gazed out the window. Iris, on the other hand, hadn’t stopped crying, her shoulders shaking silently. Mascara ran down her face in streaks, her lipstick smudged and her torn dress doing very little to hide the love marks on her skin. Gods. Rintaro’s headache worsened. If they got out of the car and the paparazzi took even one photo of Iris in her post-sex state, they were done for.

Rintaro could kiss his precious Crown goodbye.

Walking back to the Palace was akin to walking to your own death.

The lobby was torn upside down. Calling it a mess would be an understatement. The Queen stood in the middle of the furniture she’d flipped and thrown, shards of broken glass all around them as she heaved. The pure image of rage – and he had been the cause. “Fools! Idiotic fools, all of you!” she screamed, stomping through the glass as she reached up to fist Iris’ hair.

“Ow, Your Majesty–”

Her Majesty scrunched her nose at the scent of smoke and alcohol coming off from her, further fuelling her anger. “And you! By the Gods, I knew marrying you into this family was a grave mistake, but you just keep making me regret I ever laid eyes on you, don’t you? You lowly, good-for-nothing whore.”

“Mother!”

“You do not get to speak!” she turned to him and harshly let go of Iris, causing her to stumble and fall onto the broken glass. Panicked, Rintaro reached out for her, but the Queen had caught his arm, reared hers back and landed a slap on his cheek. Rintaro was stunned – she’d been harsh and cruel, but she never laid a hand on him. “Do you have any idea what you did? The throne is all in shambles because of you! The Cabinet hasn’t stopped bugging me ever since that article came out, and I have all our lines busy with people demanding for answers! And you dare raise your voice at me? I told you, multiple times, that you need to stop with your trysts. How will you be King now that you’ve lost the people’s trust?”

“He will not become King,” announced a deep voice they knew all too-well. Like a demon that only showed up in your worst nightmares, Ushijima strutted inside the room, an air of authority and finality surrounding him. “I should be the King. Help me have the throne, and I will resolve all of this,” he studied them all – Atsumu with his guilt, Osamu who was too scared of the Queen to move a single muscle, Iris clutching her bloodied arm, and Suna with disappointment written all over his features. “Clearly, he is not fit to lead this country. He is still but a foolish, young man.”

Foolish.

Stupid.

Reckless.

He’s just like his father.

He’d be a failure as King – just. Like. His. Father.

So that was who he was then. A failure. He’d become the one thing he swore not to be. How would you look at him now? You always gazed upon him with stars in your eyes, like he was the best thing to ever happen in your life. No one had ever looked at him that way before – not his mother, not even Iris. In Iris’ eyes, he was simply… a boy. A boy with no knowledge and experience in this world, a boy who she felt she had to teach because he knew so little. Only you looked at him with adoration, and even that had been taken away. Or, no, he ruined it. Just as he was the reason you used to smile, he’d also become your greatest pain. And maybe, once you’d returned him and seen how the entire country and his whole family had hated him, you would see him for who he is too – nothing but a failure.

The good for nothing Prince.

He should have known. The Palace was no place for the likes of him. He should have just stopped trying so hard to be King. He should have never used Iris as an excuse to quell his insecurity. But was it truly a crime to want to feel like he was needed?

He didn’t know anymore. The only thing he knows now was that he needed to leave, and without another word, stepped out of the room.

“Rintaro! Where are you going?!”

He ignored his mother calling for him. Perhaps he should stop calling her that, too. She’d barely been a mother. She was more of a Queen, bending and breaking her back to His Majesty’s will. She loved the crown and the power it gave her more than anything, that she willingly sacrificed her dignity to keep her position. For many nights, Rintaro watched his mother leave their quarters crying, battered and bruised. It was confusing for a young boy like him. Weren’t mommies and daddies supposed to love one another? But the Queen would scold him for being awake past midnight, and rush him back to bed while she limped on her way. She never loved the King, and because he was his son, she never loved him, too.

Rintaro was nothing but another tool for Her Majesty to stay in power.

She could never become King and hold the Kingdom for herself, but he could. Wasn’t that why she kept him locked away for years and groomed him to take in his Father’s steps?

I kind of did, he thought sarcastically, I’m a horrible husband just like him.

When you arrived in Inarizaki, the country was in chaos. People flocked you from left and right when you and Kiyoomi left the plane, causing the older Prince to break his silence and scold the nosy reporters. Flabbergasted at his sudden outburst that seemed out of character; they lowered their cameras and gave you enough breathing space. The peace, however, did not last long. Her Majesty was furious beyond what one can imagine – akin to a dragon breathing fire down to anyone who dared come near her tower. The twins, who apparently started this fire and caused Rintaro to be the fuel, had been shut away in their rooms in fear of angering her. Iris, from what little you heard about her, was being ruthlessly flamed by the media. They’d called her all sorts of unkind things you would’ve never dared say out loud.

But for some reason, seeing their downfall did not give you any satisfaction.

Because at the end of the day, they were the people you and Kiyoomi returned to. You may walk down the same hallways in the Palace, but he would always be in Belleview Manor to look for her. And you were well on your way to search for the Crown Prince who walked out on his mother.

The guards took some time to find his location, but once they did, they did not hesitate in informing you. Everyone believed you were the only person he’d want to speak to right now. So you drove up to the mountains, where it was barren and cold, and you had to use a truck to survive the rocky terrain. Seriously, out of all the places he could be, he chose to wallow in misery at the top of the world – in the pouring rain, no less.

Boots muddied from the storm, you hopped out of your truck and opened an umbrella, clutching your coat tighter as you watched your husband from afar.

This mountain served as a border between Inarizaki and Itachiyama. From where you stood, you could see the two countries – Itachiyama with its rich nature, and Inarizaki with its towering Castles and bustling cities. Once a united nation, now split into two – all because of love. A tragic story, yet a realistic one. It only goes to show how powerful, and dangerous, love could be. You knew better than anyone that whatever made you happiest could also be your greatest demise.

And there was the said demise – crouching as he picked up pebbles and threw it off the mountain wall. He wore the same shirt as from the photograph; wrinkled and stained with lipstick. Even from this distance, you could smell her on him, and you wanted to laugh. Perhaps Kiyoomi was right – maybe they never loved each other. Maybe they were just lonely.

Extending the umbrella until your husband was shielded from the rain, you softened. Rintaro visibly froze when the rain stopped pelting against him. His wet hair stuck to his face, his shirt plastered on his skin.

A myriad of emotions flickered through his devastatingly handsome face: relief, worry, surprise.

You broke the silence first and crouched down next to him. When Rintaro stiffened, you smiled, showing him you were not here to be his enemy. “My Prince. You are a difficult man to find.”

“Princess,” he breathed out, and you realized the poor Prince was shivering. His face broke into that of despair upon seeing you. “I didn’t know you would be home so early.”

“I had some matters to attend to.”

“You saw the article,” he guessed, and you nodded. Rintaro then stood to his full height, and you followed, causing his head to bump into the umbrella since he was taller. For a moment, he crouched to fit in under the small space. But it was uncomfortable, and soon, he was gently taking the umbrella and holding it for the both of you – more for you, though, since rain still trailed down his back. “I’m sorry.”

“It was bound to happen,” shrugging, you gestured for him to take a walk with you. It was far from being the most scenic place to have a peaceful walk in, but it would do.

You two were silent for a moment. Rintaro seemed to have a thousand thoughts running through his head when you finally spoke.

“How are you?”

“Tired. And you?”

“I’ve had better days.”

Rintaro stole a cautious glance. “Are you mad at me?”

You chuckled, and the sound of it stupefied him. His eyes widened as if afraid, but truly, there was no need to be. You weren’t in the mood to argue with him. “Not really. I feel like I was mad at you a long time ago, and now I’m just… Numb to it all, I suppose,” you said, absentmindedly spinning the wedding ring you both wore. Such a simple jewelry, yet it symbolized so much more. When you spoke again, the rain had calmed down a little bit, but the cold had already seeped into both of your bones. “Marriage is difficult. You have to stay true to your vows, even when the times are challenging. In sickness and in health, for richer or for poorer, for better or for worse. ‘Till death do us part,” you glanced up at him, taking in those handsome features you fell in love with – his hazel eyes, his soft lips you loved to kiss, and his face you often cradled in your palms. Even right now, you wanted to kiss him, if only to give comfort, but you had to know first –

“Do you intend on keeping your marriage vows, Your Highness?”

He averted his gaze. “I doubt our marriage is valid anymore. The country thinks I am a horrible husband to you.”

“It’s not like I’ve been the best wife myself,” you admitted, your chest aching as you remembered the Second Prince – his gentle smiles directed only at you, the castle ruins, his large palms holding you tenderly, and the crestfallen look on his face when you told him you had to look for your husband. Such a great man, but the timing couldn’t be worse. And Gods, you couldn’t help it. You cried. You mourned the love you could have had.

You grieved for the life you could have had, the person you could’ve become.

If it had been Kiyoomi, it would be so much easier. He would love you in the way you wanted. He would you close to his arms all night long because he wouldn’t want to let go. He would chase away those stupid chickens for you. He would hide you away from the rest of the world and given you a life of solitude and peace – it would’ve been simple, and it would’ve been perfect.

But Kiyoomi was already married, and so were you.

And you felt horrible because he was great, but then you’d become a horrible wife. You would be exactly like Rintaro if you had given into your desire and kissed him. Kiyoomi wasn’t yours. But was Rintaro? Your heart was everywhere and nowhere all at once.

Why couldn’t it all just work out?

Why couldn’t it be him?

Wiping your tears with the back of your hand, you forced the thoughts of the curly-haired prince out of your head. “I wish I hated you, Rintaro. I wish… I wish I never met you. I wish you never danced with me at your brother’s ball. I wish you never courted me. I wish you never came into my life and changed everything. It would have been better to never have been loved, than to have loved and been betrayed.”

Rintaro stepped forward, his arm extending to wipe your tears for you but even he could tell you were refused. So he kept his distance, clutching the umbrella tighter as his voice broke. “I’m sorry. I really am. It just… I didn’t want for it happen. You were all I thought about. When you were gone and you didn’t call or texted once, I thought I was losing you. I wanted you back.”

You shook your head. “You cannot have everything you want. You know that.”

His face dropped.

“Are you going to make me choose, too?”

“No. I already know who you would choose,” and you did, yet your heart still ached for him, for your husband, the one thing you couldn’t have. Only you didn’t feel like laughing, not when Rintaro looked at you with just as much confliction. “Is it foolish of me that I still love you even after everything you’ve done?”

His lips curled the slightest bit. “A little, but I am the last man to judge you if you were foolish, which you aren’t.”

You laughed sardonically. “I love you, do you know that?”

“I know,” he mumbled.

Who knew two words alone could puncture one’s heart so much?

Looking away, you both remained silent until Rintaro dropped the question. “What will happen to us now? Divorce is unlikely, but I might be stripped off my titles. I don’t know. But I have a feeling I certainly won’t become King anymore.”

“Do you want to be?”

Rintaro thought about it. “I do. It’s all I’ve ever known to pursue.”

“Then stand tall, my Prince. A future King doesn’t bow down to anyone, not even his Queen, and most especially not when the world is against him. We can fix this. I can fix this. I can restore your glory, but I need you to place your full trust on me.”

The plan you formed in your head would be considered insane. Her Majesty would certainly be furious, but if this was the only way to leave Rintaro, you would do it. You would protect him. You would give him back his power, and once he’s had it all, you’ll remove yourself from his life. He cannot have everything that he wants – but if you could not have love, then you want power. Even for just a brief moment, you were determined.

You were going to ruin her.

The drive back to the Palace was silent. He’d agreed to whatever plan you had, regardless of what the outcome might be. He didn’t even know what you truly had in mind. He just trusted you wholeheartedly like you asked, and told you to do as you pleased. Right now, the Crown Prince was weak. His mind was far too disturbed to process anything correctly. You would take advantage of it, simply because his compliance would be the only thing to ensure your success.

He just needed to remain silent.

Claiming he was exhausted, Rintaro went ahead first. It’d be another night where you’d sleep separately, and you would both definitely be awake the whole time. Just as you rounded the corner, you saw a hunched figure resting against the wall. He looked like he’d been waiting for you for a while. Upon hearing your footsteps, Kiyoomi raised his head – his dark eyes vulnerable, almost if hoping you would be the same as you were yesterday.

You wanted to. Truly, you did.

But the person he’d been with in Itachiyama was someone else entirely. She was someone happier, someone who didn’t have a broken marriage to worry about. She was someone who could have loved him.

Now, you were the same Princess he’d always known – the one who could never choose him.

Kiyoomi nodded to himself. He must have realized everything by now. What happened in Itachiyama stayed in Itachiyama. Pushing his weight off the wall, he strode to you with a blank expression. His eyes had gone cold again.

“We will never speak again, will we?”

“I’m sorry,” you breathed out, “He needs me right now.”

“I know,” Kiyoomi had never sounded so defeated broke, and it broke your heart. It made you want to run into his arms, to tell him it could’ve been him if you met him first. But that would sound wrong, wouldn’t it? He had been first. He’d been the last dance; the destined lover. The fated one. But man’s willpower could be so strong it battled even destiny itself, and you were both nothing but a fragment of the could’ve been’s.

“Good luck, Princess, in all your endeavors,” and then, just when you thought he would kiss you as he leaned forward, you closed your eyes. Waited with bated breath.

But he never did.

Kiyoomi only kissed your cheek, and then his scent and his warmth disappeared sooner than you would like. When he walked away, you saw all the what if’s you had to let go of.

The dream life with Kiyoomi vanished into thin air.

Wiping the tears from your cheeks, you forced yourself to turn and never look back. Kiyoomi was surely doing the same. He’d come to peace with it eventually, the love he could’ve had, the marriage he should’ve had. Itachiyama was nothing but a fantasy anyway. He wasn’t a real farmer just as you weren’t someone he could call his. It was a story doomed from the beginning.

Numbness spread all throughout your body. You’d been too drained to cry further, too exhausted to regret what you’d just done. The voice in your mind, the one who craved Kiyoomi like man needed air, had been eerily silent, too. It was if she, too, knew there was no point chasing after something that didn’t want to be chased in the first place.

All you could do was close your eyes and push the image of Kiyoomi’s smile out of your head.

He wasn’t yours. He could never be yours.

After what seemed like hours, you finally arrived at your shared quarters. The same room you left your husband in, and quite possibly the same room he slept with his mistress while you were gone.

You sighed. Opening the door, you were met by the sight of Rintaro pouring himself a drink. He’d already changed clothes – ones free of Iris’ lipstick and perfume. He looked fresh, much more composed than when he was a mess hours ago, yet he seemed… distant. Usually, he’d already perk up at you entering the room. But his face was devoid of any emotion as he poured wine into a second glass, deftly picking it up before downing it in one go. Your gaze fixated on the bobbing of his throat. How Iris’ lips kissed the column of his neck, how she’d whispered praises into his skin, how Rintaro allowed it all.

He slammed his empty glass down on the table. Leaning forward, he rested his arms on the sides of it, his voice unnaturally low as he spoke. “You know, I couldn’t stop thinking about it.”

“About what?”

“Why you weren’t mad after reading the article,” his knuckles turned white from when he tightened his grip. He took slow exhales as if to calm himself, his grip loosening before he snatched another glass.

Back straightened, Rintaro towered over you as he took slow, careful, deliberate steps – akin to a predator sneaking up on its prey. Your heart drummed in your chest, loud enough it could’ve echoed in the spacious chamber, but you stood your ground. You wouldn’t let him have the satisfaction of seeing his effect on you. Then, he stood in front of you – close enough you saw the steady rise and fall of his chest, the tipping of his head to the side as he narrowed his gaze at you. Inquisitively, suspiciously, like peeling away the layers of your skin to reveal your dirtiest secrets.

“Strange, don’t you think? Any sane wife who found out their husband was cheating on them would’ve screamed and kicked already. You didn’t do any of that.”

“I told you already. I’m too tired for any of that.”

“It could be that,” he raised his glass to your face, a portentous smirk dancing on his lips. “Or you could also be directing your affections to someone else.”

“What are you trying to say?”

He rolled his eyes, but otherwise kept his gaze on you as he sipped his drink and taking his sweet sweet time. “I wouldn’t have slept with her if you didn’t leave. You know I despise Kiyoomi, yet you still went. You completely disregarded my feelings when I said I didn’t want you to go,” he grounded his teeth, jaw clenching from the effort of holding himself back. “Is it him, then? Are you choosing him over me?”

He sounded so serious in his accusations you almost believed it yourself. “Don’t be absurd, Rintaro.”

“Oh, I’m sorry, did I strike a chord?” he said in a sing-song manner, the smile dropping from his face when you kept your lips shut. “So the rumors were right. You went with him to get back at me.”

Your jaw dropped. Yes, you enjoyed the time with Kiyoomi. Yes, you wished you never left, and you were already regretting each minute you spent longer in this damned space with him. Yes, you thought about Kiyoomi in ways you shouldn’t have – and god forbid you nearly asked him to kiss you, but not once did you think about using his brother as a ploy.

You weren’t like him.

“That’s not true, and you know it.”

Rintaro fumed. He flung his empty glass across the room, the shattering sound muted by his yells. “Prove it to me, then!”

“Are you even hearing yourself? I’m not the one who cheated! Don’t you dare turn this around and make it seem like it was my fault.”

“But it was! If you didn’t go around fucking my brother behind my back, I would’ve stayed loyal to you! I would’ve waited until you returned! What, you thought I wouldn’t know what you were doing there with him? Doing fertility dances, sharing dinners with his mother like you’re his wife, lighting stupid fucking lanterns–” swinging your arm back, your palm connected with his cheek, a resounding slap rendering the Prince speechless. He stepped back, clutching his reddened cheeks as he stared at you in disbelief.

“That is enough. Utter one more word, and I will never speak to you again.”

“You aren’t even denying it,” he spat out, “Have you fallen for him?”

You were done. So done. You wouldn’t have any of this anymore. Sidestepping him, you walked past and away from your husband, heading for your bedroom where you planned on slamming the door in his face. You’d cry for hours there if you needed to – anything to have him leave you alone. But your husband was just as stubborn as he was determined, catching up to you with ease before catching your wrist. He spun you to face him, and you froze – he reeked of alcohol, his lips and cheeks painfully red, but his eyes.

You couldn’t tell if he wanted to kill you or keep you.

“Answer me!”

You fought against his grasp. He was stronger than you by all means; you struggled and kicked and pounded your fists on his chest, but Rintaro didn’t budge. He let you hit him however you pleased, demanding repeatedly to tell him he was wrong – how you wouldn’t choose his brother over him, how it’d be him – forever and always.

“I hate you!” you bellowed at his face, falling limp in his arms from all your fighting. “I wish I never married you – it should’ve been him! I should’ve married your brother!”

“That’s a lie!”

“Oh, don’t look so hurt now, Prince. You don’t even feel a sliver of what I do. Need I remind you that you constantly choose her over me, your wife? Why should I be loyal to you when you’re not even mine?”

“I am yours.”

“You’re hers, too,” you reminded him, your eyes glinting with mischief as you recalled Kiyoomi’s words. Just then, cruel laughter bubbled from your lips. Two could play this game, and you would be the winner. He wanted to hurt you? Fine. You could hurt him even more. “You know what’s laughable, Rin? The woman you’re fighting tooth and nail for doesn’t even want you.”

“Shut up!”

You laughed harder, practically shaking in his arms as you did. Taunting him, you nudged your nose with his, forcing him to look at you and feed on your wrath. “I’m right, aren’t I? She doesn’t like you. She’s merely using you for fame and pleasure because her husband isn’t attracted to her–” the breath was slammed out your throat. In mere seconds, Rintaro had shoved you against the wall, his lips crashing down on yours with such ferocity it burned you. Your eyes stung from your tears, the back of your skull beginning to throb. But Rintaro wasn’t done with you yet.

Pinning your wrists above your head, you gasped, and he took the opportunity to slide his tongue into your mouth. He tasted like scotch and smelled faintly of her perfume. It made your stomach churn, and soon, you were groaning into his mouth, desperately trying to win in this battle of dominance. He was angry as you were frustrated, your lips molding against each other’s like swords clashing in a battle. He struck first, his kisses passionately bitter, but his taste addictingly sweet. You fought back against his hold, your breasts sliding down across his chest and you moaned – he groaned – tugging your bottom lip between his teeth until you couldn’t tell who the enemy was anymore. You shouldn’t kiss him, you shouldn’t enjoy it, but his lips were as familiar as a sunny day and you were a woman in need of light in your life.

He’s repulsive, your mind argued.

But he’s mine, your heart decided. He was, and always will be, yours. He could have Iris for as long as he wanted, but it was you who’d taken his name. It was your ring on his finger, your face next to him in the royal portraits. You weren’t the shameful mistress – you were the rightful wife. You could have him as you pleased, ruin him to your delight. Break him into thousands of pieces only to pick him up again because he was yours, yours, yours.

Threading your fingers to his hair, you dragged him closer to you. Breathed him in, pawed at his shirt in a demand for him to take it off. He was more than willing to oblige, the two of you making quick work of his buttons in between messy, breathy kisses. Shirt discarded, he grabbed your ass and your legs wrapped around his waist on instinct – the next sequence of events like a movie you’d seen before.

Your clothes on the carpeted floor.

Rintaro on top of you, your fingers intertwined beside your head. His lips on your neck, bruises on your skin and the imprint of his hands on your hips. Your mewls right on his ear. The quivering of your thighs, the stain on the sheets – the day turning into night, from dusk until dawn. He thrusts deep, enough to have you inhaling sharply through your nose. And there it was – the unmistakable scent of a vanilla perfume you’ve never owned. It’s everywhere in the room now that your eyes opened, the hazy cloud of lust ebbing away. Iris’ perfume on your vanity area, a discarded pair of white lacy thongs that wasn’t yours peeking from under the closet, and her scent – her stupidly sweet, innocent scent – blanketing the silk of your sheets.

Slowly, your fingers detached from Suna as you turned to the sides, inhaling the sheets once more because it couldn’t be, right? Maybe you had it wrong. Rintaro wouldn’t do that, he couldn’t be so cruel. You never even shared this bed with him ever since you got married. You’ve never had him hold you close as you fall asleep, never had your head resting on his chest while you both waited for the next day. He was a cruel man, yes, but he wouldn’t dare do this to you. Not while you were gone, he wouldn’t, he wouldn’t, he wouldn’t.

Yet there it was, the scent of a floral shampoo you couldn’t recognize on your pillows, and the faint smatters of vanilla and cinnamon lingered behind.

And when the damage is done, and your heart is more confused now than ever – Rintaro momentarily slumps before you, held up only by his arms, he realizes too late the tears stained on your cheeks.

“You brought her here.”

It wasn’t a question, not even an accusation. You spoke nothing but the truth, and Rintaro’s crestfallen face said it all. He’d brought her here, made love with her on your bed. Somehow, finding out that he’d fucked her in the one place you found solace in the Palace hurt more than knowing he fucked her everywhere else.

It was as if he’d stained you. Spat right at your face. Desecrated the one place you wished to hold him in, and rubbed it in your face that he couldn’t make love to you in your bed. But he could with her, because it was always going to be her, wasn’t it?

No matter how hard you tried, it was never going to be you.

Silence dawned on the room. There’s nothing but the rapid beating of your hearts, and the soft sniffles you muffle behind your first. He sees two things on your face that night: one of beauty, and one of regret. He dared himself to be brave, to wipe your tears with the pad of his thumb. The motion was oddly comforting, and for a moment – just a quick moment – you allowed yourself to be vulnerable. Leaning into the warmth of his palm, more tears dampened his skin. You were torn between asking him to stay, to hold you until it hurt less, and asking him to leave and give you a moment for yourself.

But Rintaro had already decided.

With a final kiss to your forehead, your husband crawled out of the bed. He glanced at you one last time before slipping his ring off, setting it on your bedside table, before quietly – and resolutely – leaving you behind.

[pucksandpower]

Grid Kids: Mama Bear

Sebastian Vettel x wife!Reader x platonic!drivers

Summary: when you learn that Mick has been dropped by Haas, your protectiveness takes over

Series Masterlist

The news of Mick being dropped by Haas hits you like a ton of bricks. You’re at the track trying to focus on the race weekend but the anger, frustration, and protectiveness begin to bubble up and boil over.

Sebastian notices your clenched jaw and furrowed brow. “What’s wrong, love?”

You exhale shakily, glancing at Mick who’s trying to maintain his composure despite his turmoil. “I need to have a word with Guenther Steiner.”

Sebastian raises an eyebrow. “You sure about that?”

Oh, you’re sure. In fact, you’re ready to unleash your inner mama bear in a way that no one could have anticipated.

***

You storm into the Haas garage like a woman on a mission. Guenther Steiner, usually fiery and unshakable, is taken aback by the intensity in your eyes.

“Guenther!” you call out, your voice carrying across the garage. The team members exchange nervous glances, sensing a storm brewing.

Guenther turns to you, a hint of a smile on his face, “Ah, Y/N. How can I help you?”

You want to smack that smile right off.

Your voice is ice cold, “How could you drop Mick like that? He’s a talented driver and he deserved better.”

Guenther’s smile falters, sensing your determination. “It’s just business. We had to make some tough decisions.”

You cross your arms, the fury palpable in your gaze. “Well, I hope you realize that messing with Mick means messing with our entire grid family. We stick together no matter what.”

***

Unbeknownst to you, your grid kids have gathered at a nearby corner, ready to back you up. As Guenther tries to explain himself, the atmosphere grows tense.

Charles steps forward, “Yeah, and we’ve got some words too. Like unfair, ridiculous, and insane.”

Max grins, cracking his knuckles, “And don’t forget just plain stupid.”

Guenther’s eyes widen as your grid kids begin to circle around him. The garage is now filled with an almost comical chaos — you, glaring fiercely, and the young drivers, exuding an aura of protective unity.

Guenther stammers, “Now, let’s not get carried away …”

***

Just as the situation is about to escalate, Mick intervenes, stepping in between you and Guenther. His calm presence cuts through the tension.

“Mick, you deserve better,” you mutter, still furious but willing to defer to Mick’s judgment.

Mick nods, looking at Guenther. “I appreciate the opportunity I had with Haas, but I’ve got my eyes set on the future.”

Guenther clears his throat, sensing that he’s on thin ice. “Alright, alright. Let’s just … calm down.”

Your grid kids reluctantly disperse, their stance clear but their threat implicit. As you leave the garage, your anger subsides, replaced by a sense of accomplishment.

Sebastian chuckles, wrapping an arm around you. “Is it bad that I found that ridiculously hot?”

You smirk, “Well, you know me. I’ll gladly go full mama bear when needed.”

And as you walk away, you can’t help but chuckle at the thought of the chaos you’ve just orchestrated in the name of protecting one of your own. Guenther doesn’t know what he’s in for.

***

Guenther’s day starts as it usually does. The soft light of dawn peeks through his curtains as he slowly stretches and yawns. As he pulls the duvet back, a feeling of cold, damp heaviness meets his touch. He freezes. Slowly, he turns his gaze downward to find, to his utter horror, the unmistakable figure of a dismembered horse head resting beside him.

His scream echoes throughout the entire hotel and within moments, security and a few team members burst into the room.

“What the …” One of the Haas team members exclaims, eyes wide in disbelief.

Guenther, pale and shaking, stammers, “Wh-who would do this?”

Hidden among the crumpled bed sheets is a small note:

Mick might not get his seat back but remember, the grid family always has a seat at the table.

***

The paddock is abuzz with the shocking news. Whispers travel quickly, and by noon, almost everyone has heard about the unexpected gift in Guenther’s bed. Many are baffled but those who witnessed the previous day’s confrontation have their suspicions.

Lance approaches you during lunch, leaning in conspiratorially. “Was it really you?” he asks, trying to suppress a grin.

You take a sip of your drink, maintaining an innocent face, “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

Mick, overhearing the conversation, adds with a chuckle, “It’s straight out of The Godfather. Or should I say, The Godmother?”

You wink, “Well, let’s just say it’s always good to send a clear message.”

Lando, laughing, chimes in, “Guenther will think twice before crossing any of us again!”

***

As the day progresses, the story becomes more embellished and fantastical with each retelling. Rumors of the Godmother of the Grid begin to circulate. Some even whisper that you have ties to the racing underworld, with Sebastian as your loyal consigliere.

Guenther, though shaken, tries to downplay the incident, but there’s no doubt that he’s received your message loud and clear.

Years later and he still turns and runs in the other direction whenever he lays eyes on you.

As the sun sets on another chaotic day, you and Sebastian share a quiet moment. “You know,” he begins, “I always thought you had a bit of a devious streak.”

You smirk, “Sometimes you have to be a little ... creative to make a point.”

Sebastian laughs, wrapping an arm around you, “Remind me never to get on your bad side.”

[nofingjustaninchident]

⛧° somewhere in brooklyn

summary: luke fell in love with a girl in his travel to camp. who? he had no idea himself. - based of somewhere in brooklyn.

warnings: short, angst, major character’s death

word count: 0.6k

now listening to… somewhere in brooklyn by bruno mars

“She was covered in leather and gold  Twenty one years old  I lost her in the cold  It's unfair, she's out there”  

It's known to everyone in camp that Luke Castellan had travelled all the way from Los Angeles to New York to go to camp. Everyone also knew that he met Thalia Grace and Annabeth Chase somewhere in between these two cities. Although, what no one knew was that he met someone else in his travels.

The son of Hermes - who had no idea hi was a son of Hermes back when he met her - had to go from Vegas to New York. The easiest way to do that was by bus. And that's exactly how he went.

The trip went fine, and no one sat beside him. When he was in the stop by Washington DC, a girl came by his side and asked, "Is this seat taken?"

He took his cap away from his eyes and looked up at her. She was wearing a black leather jacket, a plain T-shirt, jeans and a high-top red Nike. Her hands and wrists were covered in golden rings and equally golden bracelets. She looked expectantly at him, and he nodded, scooting a little closer by the window as if to not bother her.

As the bus went from city to city, the hours seemed to drag by. With that, he eventually got closer to the gold-lover girl beside him, as they started chatting eventually.

The boy discovered that she was in fact from New York - Brooklyn, more specifically - but had to go to Washington every three months to check on her mom. She liked listening to hip-hop, too. He confined her that he was running away from Los Angeles and his crazy mom.

He didn't tell her that he was a demi-god, though. He couldn't quite believe it yet, and that would just make her think that he was insane.

“Little miss perfect sitting at the train stop  Red Nike high tops listening to hip-hop  While we were waiting started conversating  Before I got her name along came a train” 

She looked perfect in his eyes. Despite being clearly exhausted from the many hours of constantly sitting down without ever getting up, she looked like a goddess - ironic, isn't it? And it happened that he fell in love with the girl.

But, as stupid as it was, they forgot to exchange names. He got her picture on his camera, but never her damn name. It was.. stupid, almost, but they completely forgot about the name detail. And it came to her stop

"Next stop, Brooklyn - New York!" The driver said, and she started gathering her stuff together. The time flew by when they started talking, and she completely forgot that she had to go home.

When it came to her stop, she gathered all the courage she had on her body and gave him a kiss on the cheek. "Bye. It was nice to spend this trip with you." She said, and waved at him, leaving the bus.

That's when he remembered that she never gave him her name. But she was already far, far away from him.

Even is his death, he could never stop thinking about the mystery girl he met. She was his last thought. The last thing he could think of when dying was her face. On how much he wanted to know her name, if she was happy, if she went back to Washington to take care of her mom and if she ever thought of him again.

Maybe not. Maybe he was just another travel mate for her.

But now it was too late.

Luke died without knowing her name, orf she ever looked for him.

He died without knowing that she did.

[juinxa]

BRUTUS

[ yandere! light yagami x reader | one shot (?) ]

[ based on the song “brutus” and was written in an hour,, enjoy! might be a full story, might not ]

There has always been a slight admiration in the things around you. Growing up was simply a walk in the park, you weren’t exceptional at anything, but you didn’t lack anything exceptional. School has always been mundane, so you never tried at your grades, studying was never an option because passing was always passing. The grades would suffice to counselors, so they wouldn’t bat an eye at you. To them, you were simply another student who was average. You never had a problem with it. If you were passing, why bother going above and beyond? Average grades, average friends, average reputation, and the outcome would likely be an average university, average job, and average life. Average was just a common vocabulary, and it would be enough for you.

Until him.

High school wouldn’t have come so sooner if you didn’t hear his name roll off their tongues so frequently.  Life had been fine, finally contempt at the way things were looking up. At this rate, graduation would go smoothly. You didn’t second guess yourself, nor did you berate yourself for being so plain. If it got you where you wanted, why would you complain? That is the entire point of this whole school system: to get a job and a real life. Not everyone could be surgeons and CEOs. The world needed plumbers and carpenters, too!

So when Light Yagami was shoved at the highest mark in the midterms, every damn year, you began to think that a future CEO was in the making. No matter, there wasn’t any harm in being at the top of school, plus it must be hard to maintain. You were curious to how this guy got the highest mark. Every. Damn. Time. But alas, you stopped caring because the world didn’t pay you to care.

However, the world must’ve been indebted to his ancestors because he was just about everywhere you went. Just when you pass the exam board, you saw a tennis championship, with, get this, Light Yagami. And to make matters worse, they made nationals! And this picture was the first actual look at him. Finally, a face to the famous name that’s plastered at the number one top is revealed. He was front and center, smiling with a grin that could put angels to shame. A frown etched into your lips.

Brown beautiful hair to match his brown beautiful eyes, why must God be so unfair? He was tall, too, with a lean figure. You had heard whispers about him from the girls around you, calling him attractive and a total babe. At first, you never knew the answer for yourself. Yet, upon looking at his chiseled features, it laid marked in a bubble sheet. It was sure to get an hundred. His nose was upturned and his lips were full, enough to make a pout noticeable.

A pencil snapped in your hand, frustration began to furrow in your bone marrow. You were stuck on this project, which exactly came after you got a look at Mr. Perfect. If he were here—actually, you had no reason to think about him. In fact, you had no reason to be jealous! Light has something you obviously didn’t: effort. The answer was obvious. Light had worked his ass off to get where he was at, and what had you accomplished? Nothing. You never attempted to make an effort at your work, let alone studies. So what if you can’t solve this problem? What’s another low C in this class? It wouldn’t harm your grade, why did you need to score an A, anyways?

To prove a point?

That not everything needs effort? As if. Scoffing, you throw the pencil in your bag, pulling out your phone to search up the answer instead. There was a reason you were stuck in this place, but you weren’t going to do anything. You would never reach the point of a CEO, so why bother? It would be too late to pursue that, you were in your final year of high school, everything that has happened, happened. You could obtain all A’s this year, but it would not erase the A’s and B’s (rare C’s) from your previous years. You could practice hard for a sport, but it would not guarantee a sport scholarship. You could make all the friends this year, but it would not shun your reputation from earlier years.

Point was: what’s done is done. You can’t change your future because you had drilled nails in it, locking it in place. Maybe you’d be able to wiggle it to allow some room for more but space was bound to run out. You’d like to think that in another life, you were different. Imagination helped.

Imagination did help you excel in one thing. Art. Art has always been at the tip of your fingertips. You were the president of the Art club, and you snorted. That would totally look great on resumes. Art club didn’t come with huge responsibilities like a tennis club, but it still needed time, nonetheless. You had painted murals for the school in different places. Effort was a major key in art. And by all means, did you put fucking effort in your pieces. They were your pride and joy, your babies that you held up to the light. Nothing would prune these pairings and sculptures you created.

Growing up, you wanted to be an architect. The work was exhausting, but you always thought it was just designing things and designing things is what you were good at. However, there was much more work that needed to be in it, which crushed your dreams. Sometimes, you wished you could’ve tried harder.

With a splat of paint, you dusted off any paint crumbs lingering onto your figure. The mixture of colors created a swirl of rainbows on you. Your hair was disheveled, paint specks in them. Stepping back, you placed your thumb up to measure it meticulously. You had decided that you wanted to submit your piece to a scholarship fund. Any creative piece was to be admitted for a chance to win 50,000 dollars in school funds. If you were extremely lucky, you would even get a full ride. This piece had taken months to finish, and you thought it was finally done.

This was your lifeline because you had spent too long on this. Your grades had even stumbled a bit from how much you focused on this. While that could’ve harmed you in the long run, you knew that it would be worth it when you won the prize. You had skimmed through the previous winners, all art pieces were amazing, but you had spun your own little twist to yours. Besides, this was a piece that had specific requirements based on GPA, location, age, and so on. This meant that your chances of winning were quite high.

Days had gotten increasingly slow since you’ve submitted your piece, but you had learned to keep it in the back of your mind. If you had thought about it so much, time would be much slower. There were top pieces that were picked, and people were able to see how far their art piece had gotten. You grabbed your mother in joy, seeing that you had made the top 20, but they didn’t give you any specific place. However, you couldn’t be more happy with where you were. You knew that this scholarship would help you so much with money problems. You could even pick which university you wanted to go to, granted it had to be in Japan.

Your friends had surprised you with gifts and compliments about your achievements. Even members of the art club had threw you a small party based off your performance. This made you heart heavy with how many people supported you. You couldn’t have been any more grateful.

The deadline was coming sooner than you expected. Every test you had taken had also been easy. Sure, Light Yagami had the spotlight as always with his accomplishments, but you were happy with your average life. With a small pep in your step, you made your way to the counselor’s office. She had rarely called you because there’s never been a reason to. This made you giddy, it might’ve had something to do with your scholarship. Your mind was too high off of dopamine to notice the brunet that walked passed you in a brisk hurry. In that moment, nothing could have popped your bubble of stupor, not even the doe of eyes that looked at you with curiosity—one that would soon turn into that of murder.

“[Name], I’m so glad you could make it! Congrats, I’ve heard about your standing of being in the top 10! I’m sure you must be very proud. This is huge for your future!” You counselor ushers you to sit across from her, the computer lighting up her features in a blue light.

”Thank you, I’m glad to have made it this far!”

”Have you thought about what universities you’d like to apply to after winning?”

You chuckle, “Well, if I do win, I’d like to go to maybe somewhere base. I’m not exactly sure what school specifically, but I’d like anything with a good art program.”

”You don’t think you’re dreaming too small?” She wonders, pushing pamphlets towards you. “You could reach incredible schools at this level. Your grades aren’t bad, so you have a real chance at going to be an Ivy school, especially with this scholarship. What about To-Oh?”

A grimace makes its way to your face, “I think that’s a little out of my league. That’s a prestigious school, and I don't think they even have an art program to begin with.”

”Nonsense, but they have this,” she pulls out a piece of paper. You notice it as an assignment from your freshman year about your future self and dreams. In slanted handwriting, you notice the words architect written with hurry in the “dream job” line. The word itself makes your stomach drop. You had written the quickest thing on your mind as to not be late for your next class. You remember being stuck on the question, thinking hard about what you actually wanted to do and not the salary portion of it. You had written it as a last resort, which is exactly how it’s still being treated now.

”I think it’s too late for that dream now.” You say, but she cuts you off.

”You can make this dream a reality. Grades like yours can do great things in life. Don’t doubt yourself. Besides, this scholarship is in correlation with To-Oh’s architecture design program. If you win this, it gets you a good chance. You just need to put a lot of effort in this.”

Effort, exactly what you didn’t have because you were no Light Yagami.

You left with the pamphlets in your hand has you walk back to your class. The words linger on your mind. You could still make your dream a reality. That’d be nice.

”To-Oh?! That’s elite.” Asuka jabs at your side with a grin. “You could totally make it!”

”No way, that’s too elite.” You shake your head, “I need something more realistic. Counselors are always like that with their ‘you got this’ crap and their ‘aim higher’ stuff.”

Asuka grubs on her black rice, “Well, you could always go with me, to some no name.” She cuts you off from continuing, “I’m kidding. You’re not supposed to agree. Your grades are good, [Name]. You shouldn’t be following after me, some girl with a ‘D’s get degrees mindset.’”

You don’t argue, but it does leave a bitter taste on your tongue. You would most likely be a major outcast if you went there. Everyone had probably come from rich backgrounds or because someone related was an alumni there or how Einstein level they were. It just didn’t feel like a place that could host you. Maybe in another life. But in this on, you were opting for the road most followed by.

School has started as any other. You sat at your table, discussing grades with Asuka about the last test, to which she admits she flunked, but she was barely passing with a C. It’s a miracle she’s made it this far, but you wouldn’t have anyone else by your side. When the teacher had came in, everyone had gotten to their proper place, ready to learn. This lesson wasn’t hard, and it was mostly common sense, which led your thoughts to go astray.

The window was a great place to distract yourself. You gaze off, eyes slowly fluttering with a jolt to open them. Sleep hasn’t been coming easily due to your excitement about the winner. It would be announce any day now, and you awaited for the check to come to your door. When your eyes were slowly closing, a flash blew by you, stuttering you awake. Blinking, you squinted your eyes. What was that? It looked like a book. No one else had seemed to notice, which led you to think it was probably that experience when you feel like you’re falling before sleeping.

A sharp sound from the intercom has disrupted your lesson, not that you were tuning into it anyways. It was a wonder as to what they had to announce so bad during lessons, but you didn’t mind the interruption. Asuka’s fingers nimbly played with your hair as she listened as well.

”We excuse the interruption to announce a special event that has occurred. The national art scholarship has made its final contestant to this very school! We like to send our congrats to the winner!”

Asuka grabbed your shoulders, clenching your now tense shoulders. Someone had won? And it was at this school! This was such great news! You had poured your heart and soul into that project, losing countless hours of sleep because of it. And for once, you had put actual effort. You didn’t think they'd announce it over the intercoms. You began to grow self-conscious about your looks. Did you look okay for pictures right now? Were they seriously going to announce it? Asuka held her breath as did you. Some heads looked your way, already knowing the outcome. Who else, but you!

”Congratulations to Light Yagami!”

This must’ve been what Jupiter felt like when it couldn’t be a star. You think. There’s a huge jab in your throat, and Asuka lets go of your shoulder to cover her mouth from the gasp. Everyone’s heads are not away from you, listening intently to Golden Boy. You almost throw up from the disappointment that’s stirring deeply like a stew of fucking stupidity. How stupid could you be? You? win? That was absurd. Those two didn’t even go together. Your hairs stand on edge, goosebumps and mouth turning dry from the air that’s been snatched from you.

”For his beautiful writing about the meaning of justice!”

Fucking writing? Fucking. Writing. Fucking. Writing. Fucking writing. Fucking writing. Fucking writing. Fucking writing. Fucking writing. Fucking writing.

The answer could not have been more obvious. The rest is tuned out. You don’t have the auricle to listen to the rest. You could to rip your hair out as well as your tongue. In fact, you wants to gnaw at your fingers for not doing something beautiful like him. Ripping them out would not amount to the pain your experiencing now. You want to gouge out your eyes to prevent the stares of concern that were flooding your ways. You want to pop your eardrums, deafening yourself from the cheers of the class behind you that held the one and only. 

God, you want to fucking gut Light Yagami.

You're quick to excuse yourself to the bathroom. Asuka wants to follow, but the teacher doesn’t allow it. He must’ve notice you wanted to be alone because he doesn’t bother sending anyone out before class ends. The duration of that class was you sobbing in the bathroom because for once, you were proud of what had done. You were bathed in your own glory for the effort your put forth. You felt so pitiful and useless. What was it all for? All for him to get what he wants. He had everything! He had the grades, reputation, respect, admiration, fucking everything! You weren’t even left with crumbs because he had robbed it of you. To make matters worse, Light came from a respected family! His dad was a chief officer!

Since when did Light even do art?! And since when did art consider writing excerpts? Let alone essays! When did he apply? When did he have time? He had so much stuff to do like his studying or his tennis games—or whatever else he does. You gave Light the benefit of the doubt that his life was hard because he had to maintain so much, but he does it so perfectly.

So effortlessly.

Your lips are caught between your teeth. Speak of devil, he will appear. Light Yagami is passing by you, in a hurry, you add. You’re unsure what came over you as you step in his way, mind consumed with rage. Just who was he?! He was a genius, you couldn’t deny it. 

“Congrats on the scholarship, Light! You must’ve worked really hard on it!” Your voice is chirpy, and Light stops to entertain you.

”Oh, thank you. It’s really nothing. I only applied because Professor Takashi said he’d give me extra credit for it. I wasn’t aware of the emails they sent throughout the duration. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to get something.”

This must be how alcoholics began. You note, laying in bed as the ceilings have been the most interesting thing all day. There was a three day weekend, which meant three days to sulk and wallow in your own despair at your robbing—sorry, loss. Asuka had been blowing up your phone, trying to get you out of bed and go out. You couldn’t believe Light didn’t even want to apply. He only did it so his professor would give him extra credit! What went from three extra points led to 50,000$ in tuition funds and maybe a full ride. Light must’ve pulled the lucky stick from birth, or he was simply trying. That was also an option. He worked hard for it, you couldn’t deny that. He deserved it.

So why did you lay awake thinking instead of him, it should be you?

There were even interviews on his accomplishments. They all flocked to him like he was a mother duck. And yet, when you saw him, you saw a new entitlement in his eyes. It brought a foul odor in your nose, making you grimace.

The next time you see Light Yagami, you see him. You’re everywhere he is, breathing down his neck from afar. You gawk at the perfect specimen like you’re at a zoo and he’s the exhibit, like you’re a scientist and he’s the experiment, like you’re the audience and he’s the preformer. He was in your own entrapment because you can’t help but wonder, what made him so special? What went on the head of someone like Light Yagami? What were his flaws? What were his specialities? What was he?

You hate the way people preach up to him like a God. Students are so enamored by his good looks and good grades that he don’t see the underlying cockiness etched in his mold. They cling to him as the future hope, and teachers hold his name in high regard. Be like Light Yagami! They cried. Be the best you can! They shout. Be you!

And those go upon deaf ears as you doodle on your worksheet. You’d be lying if you said you didn’t wish upon his demise, but not his timely death. You didn’t hate him, per say. You don’t think you ever could. He’s never done anything wrong but he himself, so why were you feeling this way? Was this something you should embrace? Be afraid of? Run from? Maybe you were just slightly envious.

Or maybe, you wanted to be like him: loved, enamored, worshipped, special, praised, Light Yagami. That those around you would see you has the poet that created these lovely flows, and not the muse that will never be heard because your poet deemed you not good enough. However, he was already too far to be reached, so what more can you do than to be another step for him to reach the top.

Because Light has never been mean to you for these thoughts to be explored. Contrary to your belief, Light was always nice to you. He had helped you in the past growing up. You guys were actually in the same class at some point—a lot, really. That was until high school, where he decided to triumph above you everyone. Because at one point, you were with him at the top, albeit in his own shadow. But that was middle school. Those memories were far discarded.

But maybe, your name could also be known to your peers. Maybe the praise you seek wasn’t far. Maybe you could restore your former peak from back then, when you were at the highest point, when everyone crowded you with cheers and applause. They could chant your name with bliss in their voice���like a repeated mantra. In bed, your brain wandered about the day that people would look up to you like a God.

You began to get into your own head. Spiraling was all you began to know because of one failure. That was yours to claim! Yours to cherish! Yours to hold! Yours to mold!

You held your face with your hands, staring down at the study sheet with an immense pressure. Any harder and you might’ve burnt it. The pencil laid beside the flimsy paper, waiting for its use. A clock was set aside as well, signaling your next 5 minute break, which wasn't for another hour. This small room for your study session was perfect. There were no distractions in sight. Midterms would be approaching soon, and you wanted to study meticulously for it. The plan was to be the top ranked for yourself, of course. It was for no one else but yourself. The books of many tips were sprawled all over the place, but you didn’t mind them. Math wasn’t your best subject, so you had to pay extra study time for it.

Asuka had been blowing your phone about going out, but you had stated that’d you be busy. You turned off your phone until the end of the session to show how serious you were about this. Your snack consisted of a bag of chips and water, talk about nutritional.

The clock ticked away in the corner, reminding you about a deadline that was to come. Time was faster than before and you were anticipating the days or counting down to your glory. Instead, you were opting to go into this with a clear mind, clear as a low light beams in a foggy road. A bubble popped in your head when the door open unexpectedly. You flinch, looking up to see who disrupted your session. Jaws slightly clenching, you see the clay figure of perfection himself.

Light Yagami looks as pristine as ever. He’s shocked to see you as you are him. He looks down at your mess of a study session before looking up at the door number, rereading it carefully. 42. And then he sees the faint number behind the 2, which can read 49. How curious. He sees that they changed things around a bit. His usual spot has been swapped. And behind his gaze, you see he a bit surprised that you’re here. You conclude it’s because you’re not caught dead here, let alone studying. It’s not often you see people here. So Light and the three other specs of dust that come here must be what he’s used to.

He stares down at you while you stare up at him, slouched. It seems fitting, for a someone of your caliber to be staring up at the messiah himself. And you don’t speak because that’d be out of place for you. Light straightens very little of what he can and apologizes. However, you want to laugh because it should be you who should be apologizing for what will come to him. You want to tell him that your future actions are not only motivated by envy. Because like him, you have a right to establish yourself in this world. You have a destiny that can be created. It’s there you realize the pure irony of this whole ordeal. For you do not want what Light Yagami has.

You want to be Light Yagami.

[tiredofthehumanlife]

Realizations

Barbie dolls: Jegulus x gn!reader

Summary: you and James are dating and then Sirius introduces regulus and now you both are crushing

Warnings: James gets called a whore not during sex, James wears crop tops?, Regulus kinda makes James feel bad about his shirt, trans Reggie? Is that a warning?, regulus is strange for sure, mentions of sex and arousal but like its ovulation week so what were you expecting, idk James wears bell bottoms, ITS NOT THAT CRAZY GUYS

Word count: 2.8k-ish

You loved Sirius. He was hilarious, one of the most caring and stylish people you’ve ever met. So when Sirius told you all he was going to properly introduce everyone to his little brother, Regulus, you were excited. When Sirius pulled the boy into the room with all your friends you started to understand why Sirius seemed hesitant at first. First, his brother was a bit of a bitch. Second, fuck he was hot.

You loved James. So much. He was an amazing boyfriend, an amazing person. James was your best friend who you also happened to love fucking. Not the point, point is you felt incredibly guilty finding Regulus attractive. Not only was he Sirius’ little brother, you were sitting in the same room as your boyfriend. You looked to James, you wanted to see his reaction to Regulus calling you all “a bunch of stupid dickheads.” When you looked to him, he was already looking at you. James was sporting your same blush. He mouthed wow before looking back to Sirius. Sirius was telling Regulus to be more friendly. Regulus told Sirius to shove it up his ass. At the mention of Sirius’ ass, Remus was suddenly stuttering over his words. Peter glared at Remus.

“Merlin, try to pull yourself together moony.” Peter muttered. It was funny and you would’ve laughed if you weren’t trying your hardest to not check out your friend’s younger brother in front of your spectacular boyfriend. James had stayed entirely silent this whole time. You stared at him. His eyes were wide, his cheeks were flushed, his lips were tightly pressed together. You knew the look. You’d seen it before, when James met you the first time.

You met Lovely Lily and Ravishing Remus first. You all had a study group together. Though the studying slowly started to decline as you three started gossiping more and more. They started to talk about their ever growing friend group more and more. They decided keeping you to themselves was just plain unfair, so they introduced you to their other friends. Sirius seemed a little mean, glaring at you the whole time Remus and Lily shared your name. The second you complimented his leather jacket, Sirius was beaming. Peter seemed to be ignoring you, fully focused in his homework. The next time you met him, he had no work in front of him. You warmed up to Peter quickly after that. You had first avoided James’ eyes because he seemed to be intimidating. He was just sat there on the ground staring up at you and you thought he was amping up to insult you. When you finally looked at him you realized you have just met a man with absolutely nothing behind his eyes. His jaw was slack and he was just staring up at you. Lily reached out and gently closed James’ jaw for him. He finally sat up straight, greeting you with a large smile. You nodded awkwardly. James pressed his lips together, trying to stop himself from saying something to stupid. His eyes were bugged out and his ears were turning red. Now James was giving Regulus the same look.

You honestly weren’t upset he was into Regulus, because you were too. Clearly, you needed to have a private conversion with James about this later. You did. You both liked him, and now you had to figure out how to handle this. Do you both flirt with your friend’s brother? Do you pretend like nothing is going on? You really didn’t want to scare poor Regulus away. You both knew how hard it must’ve been for him to meet his brother’s friends. It would just be so strange and uncomfortable if half your older brother’s friends started flirting with you the day after you met them. So, you both decided you’d give him time to get comfortable with all of you before either of you said anything to Regulus.

Months later Regulus was like he’d been with you all since day one. He jokingly made fun of everyone, making his own inside jokes with you all, and he’d join in on pranks and plans. Sirius was quite happy he got time to make his bond with Regulus stronger. Remus got another person who loved to gossip. Peter got a friend who loved history as much as he did. Lily got someone to share her younger sibling trauma with. You and James got a lovely friend who was so funny and mean to you both. He hated you guys. You both loved it. You’d throw insults back and forth all the while a grin plastered on your face. Next to you both James would be sat there with his lovesick eyes and soft smile. His eyes bouncing between you both as Regulus threatened to torture you horrifically, only for you to continue flirting with him. James would be grinning brightly, so happy he got to watch the two hottest people in Hogwarts try to kill each other.

When you and James caught a glimpse of Regulus sitting across the Library while on your study date, you turned to each other. You shared a knowing look, closing your books and making your way over to him without a word. The second you slipped into the seat in front of Regulus, he sighed deeply.

“And I thought my day was going well.” Regulus muttered, keeping his eyes on the journal he was scribbling in. James stood next to you, already smiling.

‘Awe come on Reggie, you love us.” You countered, resting your head on your palm. Regulus glanced up at you. Regulus bit onto the end of his fountain pen as he looked over you and James. You dropped your gaze to his lips. The pen pushing down on his bottom lip making it look extra kissable. Your eyes trailed down the pen, seeing his initials engraved with silver.

Sirius gave it to him after he came out. You remember because Sirius came to you with zero context just blurting out ‘how does one love a trans man?’ After a long few minutes of you staring blankly at Sirius, he explained the situation further. You had seen Regulus sitting in various odd positions and places, writing away. You noticed how he had to balance an ink pot in one hand and write with the other, so all you could come up with as a coming out gift was a pen. Although Sirius told you it made Regulus cry and you’ve never seen Regulus without it. You’re glad Sirius got all the credit.

Your gaze followed down to his hand gently holding onto the pen. His rings were always attractive, it wasn’t just you. James thought so too. Regulus kept rubbing his finger over the small ring of silver near the tip of his pen. You shouldn’t have found it hot. It was though. James rested his hand on your shoulder, gently squeezing it to say ‘i know right?’ You met Regulus’ eyes again to see him looking you up and down. His eyes flickered over to gazing over James’ body. James had found the magic of crop tops a few weeks back and now any chance he got his was showing off his happy trail in a shirt with some phrase like ‘I love milfs’ or ‘eat your girl out or I will’. You loved them, you didn’t love all the detentions he got from getting dress coded. You felt it was a fair trade. Regulus’ eyes snagged on his happy trail. Regulus poked the inside of his cheek with his tongue. He suddenly sat up straight and schooled his features, meeting your eyes again. You gave him a knowing smile.

“If you consider wanting to partake in homicide love, then yes. I do.” You smiled at him letting out an awe. You shared a look with James. You reached out, hooking your finger in the belt loop of his bell bottomed pants. You tugged James closer and winked up at him.

“You hear that, Jamie? He loves us. We love you too Reggie.” Regulus rolled his eyes. He turned back to his journal. You leaned over the table, peeking at his writing. Regulus slammed his journal shut. He slowly slid it across the table, hiding it in his lap.

“What are you writing?” You tapped Regulus’ hand on the table. He didn’t move his hand away, nor did he wipe it.

“Is it dirty?” James added in. You both turned to him, giving him a confused look. James look between your faces. He pressed his lips together.

“I’d call you a whore-“ Regulus started.

“Oh please do.” You smirked. Regulus ignored you continuing with his sentence.

“But I think you’d like it too much. Potter have you ever heard of a shirt? You put your arms through it? Covers your torso? Not ringing a bell, or did you leave your brain at home?” James looked down at his shirt, frowning at it. He pulled at the hem.

“What’s wrong with my shirt?” He sounded like a kicked puppy. You quickly reached out, rubbing his thigh.

“Nothing baby it’s so cute.”

“You mean aside from it breaking half of dress code?” Regulus said, talking over you.

“Do you not like my tummy, Reg?” You grimaced turning to James.

“Don’t say tummy.” You and Regulus said, in sync. You glanced over to him. You shared an understanding look before smiling softly at James. His shoulders had slumped a little since the start of the conversation. You stood up. You rubbed your hand up and down James’ arm, kissing his cheek.

“See you later, Regulus.” You whispered, gently tugging your boyfriend away.

“I hope not.”

You and James carried on like usual, following your usual routines and date nights. Only difference was Regulus seemed to appear more and more. You never asked him to join you guys or tell him to meet you, he just kind of showed up. You and James had planned date nights on Tuesdays and Thursdays. Weekends were anybody’s game or makeup time for a missed date but Tuesdays and Thursdays were pretty regular for you two. Date nights meant anything from passing out on the floor of the common room to breaking more rules than you liked to. Though it didn’t seem to matter what you two were doing because Regulus appeared near you. If you were sitting by the Black Lake just to relax in each other’s presence you’d catch a glimpse of Regulus’ hair across the lake. You’d both stand up to wave to him, if he did notice he never waved back. If you were lying in the courtyard napping in the sun, you’d roll over to see Regulus under a tree not far from you. You’d drag James up and lay back down next to Regulus. If you were having a study date in the Library you’d see Regulus walk past with a tall stack of books. You’d pull James up by his arm, following after Regulus. You’d all share the same table with Regulus pretending he didn’t notice either of you. No matter what he was somewhere near you and James. So you’d include him, obviously. It’d be awkward if you didn’t. You started to think that maybe this wasn’t all coincidence when you saw Regulus showed up in the Gryffindor commonroom, hunched over his journal like usual. His shoes were placed on the floor next to the end of the couch. Regulus was sitting to the side his back pressed to the armrest with his knees pulled to his chest.

“Hey Reg, what are you doing here?” You asked. James scoffed behind you. You glanced at him and grimaced, realizing it sounded kinda mean. Regulus looked up from his book, biting the top of his pen again. He raised an eyebrow at you.

“Well fuck you too then.” He muttered. You rolled your eyes, sitting down next to him. Regulus tucked his socked feet under your thigh. You knew he ran cold, you were actually secretly making him a sweater for his birthday. You wouldn’t dare tell him that though because A: it would ruin the surprise and B: he’d get all ‘no you shouldn’t have. I don’t deserve this’. He’s all traumatized like that, so you kept it quiet. Only person who knew was James. James laid down on the couch, dangling his legs over the armrest and throwing his head in your lap.

“I didn’t mean it like that, Regulus. You know I love your company. I was just confused because I don’t think you know the password.” You stared at Regulus, hoping he’d show you somehow that he wasn’t truly hurt by it. Regulus stared at you with his blue eyes. Both of the Black brothers had blue eyes. Sirius’ were a light piercing blue that, upon your first interaction, you thought were freaky. He seemed to peer directly into your soul, seeing everything you were and loving you anyways. Maybe that’s why Remus liked his eyes so much. Regulus’ were a deep blue. When he finally made eye contact with you, you felt like you were getting sucked into the depths of the ocean. His eyes were all consuming. They covered you in him, all you think about when looking into Regulus’ eyes was Regulus. If Sirius’ eyes looked into your soul, Regulus’ showed you his soul. Regulus looked back to his page, making you miss his stare.

“What you guys doing here anyways?” Regulus muttered like it wasn’t your boyfriend’s common room. You slipped your hand behind Regulus’ knee massaging the back of his calf. Regulus didn’t react at all, continuing to scribble away. James tilted his head back, staring at Regulus upside down.

“Date night.” James explained, laying back down. Regulus winced, he looked to you to verify. You nodded.

“Oh wow James you sure are romantic, taking your partner all the way to your common room.” Regulus said. You smiled at him. You patted James’ chest, reminding him he could take you to a landfill and you’d still love him. James sat up.

“Hey we were going to go take a nap. That’s very romantic.” James said. He pointed at Regulus like a scolding mother. You gently pushed James’ finger down. You pecked his cheek.

“Yes you are so romantic James, no need to fist fight Reg.” James glared at Regulus as he laid back down in your lap. You rubbed Regulus’ calf up and down before returning to massaging it. You sat in silence for a few moments. Regulus continued writing away, while James started fiddling with your hand on his chest. You switched calf’s every few minutes, not wanting them to get uneven amounts of attention. You dropped your head back against the couch, closing your eyes. You heard Regulus move next to you. He gently traced the silhouette of your nose. You opened your eyes and stared at him without moving your head. You didn’t want to scare Regulus taking his hands away. Regulus dragged his finger down to your lips. His jaw went slack as he felt your lips against his fingertips. You held your breath as you felt a wave of arousal travel down your spine. His fingers dipped past your chin. Regulus traced down your throat, stopping at your collarbones. He fiddled with your necklace. Regulus moved the little J charm between his fingers. Regulus pulled his eyes away from your necklace to your eyes. You let out a small breath.

“You both ought to go take that nap now. I doubt you want to be spending your date night sat next to your friend’s little brother.” James sat up. His eyes snagged on Regulus’ fingers playing with your necklace. James looked up to you and gave you a smile. You both looked back to Regulus.

“Regulus, baby.” He gave you a confused look. He glanced between you and James. James sucked in a breath.

“We already spend most of our dates with you, so it wouldn’t really be much of a change.” James explained. Regulus removed his hand from you, closing his journal. Regulus stared at his lap for a few minutes, before looking up.

“I do not understand.” You gave him a small smile. You reached out and pushed his hair away from his face. You cupped Regulus’ cheek and rubbed your thumb against his skin. You leaned forward. Regulus fluttered his eyes shut, tilting his face up towards you. You gently kissed his cheek, teetering close to the corner of his lips. You pulled back. Regulus stared at you as you stood up. James quickly pecked Regulus’ other cheek before bounding up the stairs after you.

Regulus was starting to realize certain things about himself.

Part 2 >

[stvngrantsgf]

you had me at "fuck you" ☆ post hogwarts!draco x muggleborn male!reader - Chapter One

Life for Draco after Hogwarts was what he expected as soon as he took the Mark. His dreams of greatness and the wrecking ball he imagined the Malfoy name being for his future were discarded; they were simply too damaged to repair and were a "wrecking ball" in ways he did not like. Walls that he imagined himself breaking down to rebuild as his own were broken but strengthened to keep him out. Draco wished he could say it was unfair but he knew the outside world had done nothing wrong. It was all due to his own faults.

So he did what they had all wanted him to do, he killed himself. Draco Lucius Malfoy was dead, buried with his mother and father and left to decay in Malfoy Manor. His crimes were not forgotten and he watched from afar as they brutally battered what they perceived as his corpse. He had moved away from pureblood society, stole a drunkard's wand, cast Disillusionments over every recognizable part of himself, abandoned his family's inheritance, and went to live in Muggle London where none would recognize him. He barely recognized himself.

He lived in a small flat which he shared with Spencer, a Muggle man he had obliviated into thinking he was there all along. His once striking, pale blond hair was now a plain, dull brown. His cold, grey eyes turned to a light, honeyed brown. He had cast glamours over his scars with ease, grateful for the blank slate he appeared to be. He was Deacon, a young man who worked as a bartender in the smallest, smelliest pub a couple blocks down.

Draco liked life as Deacon. No one gave him a second glance out of fear or disgust but sometimes out of attraction. He was normal. He didn't worry about the Golden Trio, the responsibilities his parents has placed on his shoulders, Voldemort's daily torturings. He could just be. And that was something he had never experienced before. As time went on and the fear of being discovered faded, Draco spent longer and longer in his glamours and disillusionments having become obsessed with the euphoria he associated with Deacon.

He was on his way to work, walking and humming a tune he had heard Spencer playing on his drums earlier.

Everlong, was it?

He had discovered within days of living in Muggle London that their music was exciting and brilliant. He hadn't known how advanced Muggles happened to be until he was surrounded by them. The telly was one of the first things he became enraptured by.

He pushed through the pub doors, flashing a smile to his friend, Sally, who worked the shift before him.

"Sally."

"What's up, Deek!"

He winced, finding the name she had given him on his first day still irritating. He looked around at the surprisingly crowded bar and leaned on the counter to talk over the blasting music.

"Is there an event tonight I didn't know about?"

The girl shook her head before pointing at something over Draco's shoulder.

"I think it's a party for birthday boy over there!"

Draco turned his head curiously over his shoulder. His back immediately straightened and his eyes widened.

The birthday boy was gorgeous. He stood on top of a chair dancing sensually to the song playing over the speakers. His hips moved side to side and his hair framed his face beautifully as he moved to the beat. He sang along to the lyrics loudly with great feeling that if Draco had not heard the accompanying music, he would have thought the boy had wrote it.

"NO! I DON'T WANT NO SCRUB! A SCRUB IS A GUY THAT CAN'T GET NO LOVE FROM ME. HANGING OUT THE PASSENGER SIDE OF HIS BEST FRIEND'S RIDE. TRYIN TO HOLLA AT ME!"

Draco smiled, watching and enjoying the show he was putting on. He bit his lip as the boy, or man rather judging by the giant headband he wore on his head with the number 20, dipped low and his low-rise jeans revealed an emerald g-string with a bow. Draco looked away, swallowing, as he turned back to Sally, who was grinning at him.

Draco rolled his eyes at her childish behavior.

"He's single, I overheard his friends when they came to get a drink. Apparently, he's looking for a man to go home with tonight."

Draco looked back at the man, who had gotten off the chair and was now giggling with his friends.

"Good for him."

He cleared his throat.

"I'm gonna put my things away. Don't do anything stupid while I'm gone."

"Oh no! But, Deacon! How will I manage when you're my only brain!"

"Shut it, you witch."

"I'm not a witch! They aren't real!"

Draco smirked as he walked away.

☆

A/N: Hey guys! So this is my first time writing ANY HP fanfiction - I've read A LOT though, haha. Please be kind and if you like it, comment or like so I can release Chapter Two which will be from your/my character's perspective :) also NOT proof-read

[mari-lair]

It wouldn't make sense for Aoi to have her memories, much less fake her engagement with Teru, because we see Aoi at the start of the world reset and she is acting as if everything is normal, with no worries at all.

While Nene was confused and consumed by a sense that "something isn't right" and Teru was punching Akane in the student council, begging for answer, Aoi's only goal was enjoying the festival with Nene, which would be an extremely weird reaction to suddenly having her numb hand working again and being in a whole new world.

Plus, Aoi already knew Nene would be the star of their class play, something we and Nene, who are only familiar with the old timeline, had no way of knowing was the case.

So Aoi's memories and priorities do not match ours or our protagonist's right now.

The final thing that make me sure the engagement isn't some grand elaborate plan is that Aoi explains to Nene of all people that Kou is "Teru-Kun's brother" acting as if she is more familiar with Kou than Nene and using first names when there is no one to put on a show for.

Teru was as confused as Nene, everything Akane had explained the readers had been news for him too. He was scrapping for answers, even the most basic ones about the situation.

He is still prodding for more information. He does not have the upper hand here.

Even in the very wild possibility that Teru found Aoi first while searching for Nene and both awakened her memories and convinced her to have a marriage plan, it still wouldn't make sense? Cause Aoi had called Kou "Teru-kun's brother" from the very start.

Aoi also brought her mom into this marriage.

She never mentions her mom in the original timeline, so her mom will only visit the festival in this new world (once more, she is living in a different reality from the one we know.)

She is not the old Aoi, she acts way too different: determined to ignore Akane, clingier with Nene, and openly showing her anger/displeasure with Teru.

So I can't see her 'pretending' to be amnesiac. Or Teru pretending to be confused.

This feels genuine:

Teru only becomes smug when he notices the news has a giant effect on Akane, before that, he was just plain confused.

Which brings me to the second part of the ask.

"do you think this is the plot way to force Akane to join forces" and I don't think so. At least, not yet? It's hard to say with the minimal information we were given on the situation.

On the broad strokes Nene, Teru, and Akane are already on the same team the three don't like this reality. They don't want to be here. They miss their old world.

These two panels are after the 'Aoi engagement with Teru' reveal but this has been his mental state from the start. There are a lot of gags about the engagement and I do adore how pathetic Akane is in it, but he doesn't suddenly hate this new world because Aoi can't be with him.

He had hated it from the start.

The way he never includes himself when talking about how this timeline could be 'better for some people' is telling enough.

I have no doubt Aoi's engagement is one hell of a motivator but he had explicitly told us "I didn't have a choice on this, the only choice I had was to stay a clock keeper and hold on to any power I can" from the start.

But you may be asking if this is a plot device for him to have a proper team up with Teru and Nene, a true join forces and become a unit case! Not just a 'similar goal' type of deal.

Which... I find it unlikely.

Aoi's getting a big involvement will make Akane worried, will make him want to protect her, but I just can't see him asking for help, he trusts Teru to keep her safe, so no need to be glued to her side, and he is the kind of idiot who tries to do everything himself, even when his situation is unfair.

(Aoi still doesn't know he made a contract with the keepers to save her life, and he had kept his double life secret from his classmates for years, not letting it slow down his class rep duties, for example.)

So I can picture him hunting Tsukasa alone (and not mentioning to anyone, because that his duty as a clock keeper and of course he wouldn't shove it on someone else, especially when everyone is so angry with him for ruining their present.) but maybe the plot make his hunt cross paths with Nene storyline (which we know will involve hanako) or the wedding somehow (Akanes and Minamotos have history that involves sacrifices and their marriage begs the question of "what changed? why are they united in this timeline?") AND THEN a proper team up happen?? Honestly i have no idea.

It's too early for me to have a clear idea of what Aidairo intends to explore with Teru and Aoi's engagement but my hope is that it serves to flesh out Aoi and Teru's character and their home situation.

(Honestly, I just want Teru and Aoi to have a proper talk. It's a crime that the best teru and aoi conversation we have is from a spin-off. )

[mbat]

my G5 mane six redesigns! + how they look in my AU. also obv they have how i made them in ponytown beforehand for reference. i talk about my decisions below the cut :p

i changed sunnys cutiemark from 'generic shooting star' to a sign with two overlapping stars because i feel like it fit her whole 'standing up for what she believes and wanting everyone to come together' thing.

i changed hitchs from a cop badge with a horseshoe to being an admittedly rough version of a judges hammer and paw print. hes not a cop in mine because like... no. but he still cares about the law and what hes told is right, and also obviously still has animals following him around just because he exists :p

im not completely satisfied with him, i wanted his hair to be closer to his ponytown counterpart, and i still think the cutiemark could use some work, but it gets the point across. i kept the sash because its a fun accessory and it gives 'kid in school thats always bossing people around to keep in line based on the rules' to me. hall monitor? we didnt have those in my school but hall monitors on tv are similar LOL

i changed zipps from a plain lightning bolt with a crown because like. okay sure shes a princess but she really didnt seem to care much for that role, and she still doesnt care for it in my au. i liked how she was meant to be detective-like so i kept that aspect and gave her a magnifying glass while keeping the lightning bolt within it.

i kept izzys, pipps, and mistys cutiemarks the same. pipp is still a princess-y musical pony, izzy is still a creative DIY queen, and misty is still... well to be completely honest i still cant put her whole thing into words but i still liked the concept so yeah.

i leaned a little bit into their names with some of them. starscout, storm, petals. felt like it wouldve been too much to do it with all of them, especially since not all of them have spots on their legs. and yes, star shaped freckles. mistys freckles are supposed to be butterfly shaped but its hard to do that with them that small...

i kept all their haircolors basically the same even if i changed the hair for basically all of them. i thought it would add a lot to actually have different hair textures and for them to not all be pastel ponies, even if it is the pastel pony franchise. plus i remembered the criticism about how the only pony with actually textured hair was the one working with the villain and how unfair and weird that was.

i wanted pipp to actually still have the same hair shape as her canon counterpart but i couldnt figure out the little bendy part :'] thats on me though

i know mistys hairdye is meant to match her cutiemark, but i kinda didnt like that it just completely covered up her natural hair color, and i liked her natural hair colors so i kept them *and* the dye.

also zipps monocle is literally just cause its like cartoonishly detective-y and i thought it would be cute and dorky. girl who was raised in a castle imitating her favorite detective stories. idk maybe theres one like that in their world cause i thought sherlock in our world had one but i. am realizing i dont think he did. too bad for him

[napswithwolfie]

LU Pokemon AU

bro the strength it took not to give him a full dog team

Wolfie is still a regular wolf. Not a mightyena, an absol, or even a lycanroc, just a plain regular wolf, and it weirds everyone out because no one has ever seen a creature like wolf link. 

Oh and if his team feels split, well that’s intended. Which half suits him better or does the full team represent him well ;DDD 

Time Sky Warriors 🐶Twilight Wild Legend Hyrule Four Wind

Team descriptions under the cut 👋👀

🐶Poipole: Midna, or his memory of her. So Poipole doesn't join Twi's team until the end of tp after the mirror is shattered. I imagine Poipole is born from the remains of the shattered mirror’s dust, suffused with the negative ‘other worldly’ energy of the arbiter's grounds. 

When Twilight hears giggling in the mirror chamber, he doesn’t think much of it. He has spent too many moments since their separation reminiscing about her. Even now, he decides to humour his heartbreak, imagining some lighthearted quip about how far he has fallen for her to stoop to hallucinations. He chuckles at himself and his imaginary conversation with Midna.

🐶Hisuian Typhlosion: in this au ghost types are the only pokemon unaffected by the Twilight. If anything, they already exist between worlds as, well ahem, ghosts. 

There's even that nostalgic weight leaning on his shoulder... Wait... Twi realises he's down bad, but even this is ridiculous! He whips his head over his right shoulder, and there, face to face, is a creature unlike anything he's seen before, wearing an all-too-familiar grin. They zip up and away, hovering nearby with playful curiosity in their eyes, waiting to see his next move. At his bewildered and stunned reaction, they let out that chiming giggle he heard earlier

---

You don’t have to look far to find where Poipole’s gone. If they aren’t hitching a ride on the back of any of their teammates, then they’re off causing trouble together with Time's mons.

🐶Incineroar: Twi didn’t get a choice when this little litten chose him in the alleys of Castle Town, though as a cat man he doesn't mind this one bit. 

Typhlosion first encountered Twilight when he was miserably lost in the Twilight zone of Death Mountain. Pretending to be one of the wandering souls, unaware of the blanketing twilight, Typhlosion carefully ambled in their direction to get a better look at the strange creature. They could feel a rich and powerful soul within Twilight, and noticed how the twilight both welcomed and repelled it. Even odder was their partner sitting on its back. Typhlosion knew dark energy when they sensed it, and that imp's soul was a pool so dark it threatened to swallow up the light - hrm, now there's an interesting thought. 

---

Just because you don't catch Typhlosion causing trouble doesn't mean they're not as much of a prankster as the others—actually, they're worse. Typhlosion has a knack for roping in carefully selected allies into their mischief. Despite their playful nature, they often go missing, staring out at seemingly nothing. As a ghost type, they're attuned to wandering spirits, and will spend much of their time listening to them and helping them pass on whenever they can.

Incineroars are excellent with children, and you can't change my mind. They're not named the 'Heel Pokemon' for nothing! They love playing with kids, pretending to be the villain to defeat, staging extravagant fights with spectacular victories for the heroes. Twilight's Incineroar is particularly protective of its family. Despite aiding 'The Hero,' they are anything but honourable in battle. They're not afraid to employ unfair tactics, from small actions like throwing sand in their opponents' faces to targeting eyes and joints, even going after the enemies' allies. They are unflinching in the depths they will go to achieve victory. 

🐶Mudsdale: Epona but buffer. Twilight's first companion, Mudbray would happily tackle the world together with all the confidence of an unstoppable 8 year old.

🐶Volcarona: Twilight was given a pokemon egg after restoring Faroe's light. It was terrifyingly cold when Twilight first held it, so chilling that even Midna thought it might be a morbid joke from the light sprite. Despite this, Twilight insisted on keeping the egg. 

With each zone of Twilight lifted from Hyrule, the Light Spirits would bestow a ‘boon’ onto Twilight’s team. Cryptic as always, Twilight had no clue what help he received. Steadily throughout his quest the egg grew warmer, almost scalding by the time the last zone of Twilight was lifted; and upon receiving the final sprites boon the egg hatched. 

Volcarona can be quite aloof. It lives at its own pace, exuding a divine presence that others cannot easily disrupt.

🐶Garchomp: I wanted a brutish pokemon that reflected (heh mirrors) his curse and it was a difficult decision between Garchomp and Kommo O.  

It was nothing short of a miracle that Twilight survived the encounter with Garchomp. The Twilight Blighted Pokemon was already an apex predator in its territory, its strength bolstered by the dark magic of the twilight. Twilight doubted he could defeat them. Forced to sneak around, he found that being a hero seemed to attract unwanted encounters - Garchomp suddenly stomped its foot, shaking the earth violently the ground threatened to topple Twilight, as sharp pillars of earth tore across the terrain toward his hiding spot.

Fight fight fight and somehow Twilight lives, Garchomp faints, dark mass is dispelled and happy happy cat meme goes here.    

Garchomp sometimes loses itself in battle, with adrenaline accidentally triggering a mega evolution that sends it into a rage. The aftermath leaves Garchomp feeling deeply ashamed, as it struggles to accept its own savagery.

---

Notes: twi’s team gave me the hardest time istg. There were too many mons to try and squeeze in, aaaaahhh a total nightmare: Exhibit A (scrapped idea)

But fr not a single dog in twi's team??? Yea well about that… Have Midna's team:

[Necrozma: The rest of the chain aren't aware he has a sixth pokemon at all. He just tells them he technically counted as one during his quest, satisfied that the lie works.

So nezzie here is a nod to the fused shadow that twi does accept in the manga. I have this idea that he has forced guardianship over the fused shadow, as a punishment, but also his duty as the hero. Twis conflicted regarding nezzie - On the one hand he is comfortable with what it represents but there's a deep fear of shame to admit to others he has formed a bond, though tentative, with nezzie.]

In a dungeon chest Twilight finds a Fire Stone. He gives it to Midna saying how it reminds him of her hair.

(No gogoats for twi. Sadge) 

🔂Time 🐥Sky 🌹Warriors 🐶Twilight 🏹Wild ✌️Legend 🍃Hyrule 🧩Four 🌊Wind

🔴 Partner pokemon: Poipole 

⚪ Smaller team: Poipole, Mudsdale, Incineroar

[knuffled]

not so bad - chapter 8

last chapter of the punk!percy fic! hope you all enjoy

ao3 link

Saturday, six on the dot. Annabeth sat in her car in the parking lot outside Sally’s and drummed her fingers on the steering wheel. She had to reign in the itch to glance at her phone, which laid face up in the passenger’s seat, in case Percy texted her. When she got to the restaurant, she’d shot him a text letting him know that she was there, and he’d replied that he’d be out in a few minutes. It had only been a minute or two since then, but the wait felt intolerable to her.

The last time she’d been on a date was a total trainwreck. She’d been a sophomore going out with a college freshman named Luke, which should have been enough to clue her in to the fact that she was dealing with a creep, but in her hubris, she’d thought he saw something special in her, recognized her maturity even. In the end, it was because he’d assumed Annabeth was impressionable and easy, mistakenly so considering she had ditched him at the restaurant under the pretense of needing to use the restroom.

She didn’t have fears that her date with Percy would be like that, but in the three minutes she sat there, she became woefully aware of her own lack of dating experience. It had never mattered to her before, but she didn’t want to come across as lame and uncool in front of someone as effortlessly debonair as Percy.

Oof. Debonair. An SAT word. Definitely lame and uncool.

Annabeth peeked down at the outfit Piper had helped her choose: a billowy, black shirt-like blouse and a pair of high-waisted white pants. Even she had to admit the outfit looked good, but now that she had time to languish in her own mental prison, she wasn’t sure it would be to Percy’s taste. Annabeth buried her face in her hands. God, she should’ve gone with something more fun and casual.

A knock on her window made Annabeth jolt in her seat. It was Percy, motioning for her to roll down her window, so she did. As he rested a forearm against the doorframe and leaned in, the scent of his cologne caught her off guard and made her face prickle.

She shook her head to physically dispel her thoughts and said, “H-Hey.”

“Hey yourself,” Percy said, smiling. “I was thinking I could drive tonight, but I’ll leave it up to you.”

“Uh, yeah, no, that’s fine by me,” Annabeth said.

“Cool!” Percy said, straightening. “You can just leave your car here in the lot then.”

Annabeth nodded and turned off the ignition before grabbing the keys and her purse. Percy rocked on his heels, hands in his pockets, and grinned at her when she got out of the car. As they started walking, Annabeth took a second to get a proper look at him since she’d been too frazzled to before. He was wearing a black bomber jacket over a plain white t-shirt and a pair of black chinos. It was almost unfair how good he looked with such a simple outfit, like James Dean or something.

He must have noticed her staring because he coughed surreptitiously. “Am I too underdressed or something? I can head inside and change real quick?”

“Oh, no, you look good,” Annabeth said quickly. “Great actually.”

“Yeah?” Percy asked, ducking his chin. “Well, I think you’ve got me beat in the outfit department. You look, um- spectacular.”

It was a little pathetic how giddy that made her feel. “T-Thanks.”

Percy shot her a boyish smile that she couldn’t help returning. When they came to a stop in front of a blue Prius, Annabeth couldn’t help giving him a little shit.

“Who would’ve thought,” Annabeth drawled. “Percy Jackson drives a Prius.”

“It gets good mileage, okay?” Percy protested, his face turning pink. “And it’s environmentally friendly!”

Annabeth bit back a smile and shrugged. “Just seems like an odd fit for a brooding, bad boy-type.”

Percy rolled his eyes and opened the passenger’s side door for her, which was such an antiquated, chivalrous thing to do that it made her swoon just a little bit. He waited until she was settled before sliding into the driver’s seat and starting the car. As they pulled out of the lot, Percy reached to turn on some music out of habit, but a Nirvana riff blared through the speakers so loudly it felt like getting hit in the face with a shovel. He immediately shut it off, but Annabeth laughed at the way his cheeks flushed.

He ruffled his hair and muttered, “Sorry. Forgot I had it turned up that loud.”

“Was that Territorial Pissings?”

Percy turned to her, eyebrows raised. “You know that song?”

Annabeth nodded. “Yeah, one of my stepbrothers, Bobby, is obsessed with Nirvana. He got a guitar for his birthday, and he’s trying to learn their songs.”

He gave an innocuous look and asked, “And how has that been?”

“Awful,” Annabeth admitted. “Like, hearing a total newbie butcher Nirvana riffs on a shitty practice amp is miserable, especially when their bedroom is right to yours.” “Yeah, I’ll bet,” Percy said, laughing. “What kind of music do you listen to?”

“I like a lot of stuff.”

“C’mon, that’s a cop out answer,” Percy said. “Give me a guilty pleasure song.”

“I don’t believe in guilty pleasure songs,” Annabeth said, shrugging.

He gave her a sidelong glance. “Hmm, I can see that, considering you’re the heathen that puts pineapple on pizza. Shame probably isn’t in your vocabulary.”

Annabeth snorted with laughter, which made him smile. There was something so easy about talking to him. They must have driven for at least a half hour, but it felt like five minutes passed because the conversation flowed so well between them. Annabeth had seen in movies or heard from Piper that chemistry was important when it came to romance, but she’d never known what that meant. The idea of magically clicking with someone, feeling effortlessly seen and understood, sounded like a fantasy. At the very least, it wasn’t something she ever thought would happen to her. And yet, here she was, talking to this gorgeous boy that she hadn’t even known four months ago, and she suddenly understood what Piper had meant.

Eventually, Percy pulled into a parking lot and opened the door for her again. Annabeth tried to ignore the heat of his hand on the small of her back as he guided her inside the building. It was an indoor mini-golf course.

When Annabeth glanced at him, Percy shrugged and said, “A little cliché, I know, but you’re a competitive person so I figured getting your ass kicked is probably your love language.”

Annabeth barked a laugh. “Oh, is that right? You sound awfully confident.”

His eyes twinkled. “Only a little bit.”

They got a pair of clubs and spent the better part of two hours taking a child’s game far too seriously. True to his word, Percy did end up kicking her ass, but Annabeth did a damn good job for a first-timer. By his own admission, she would have won if they’d played as beginners. Still, it was a ton of fun since Annabeth tended to scare people off by being too intense and competitive, but instead that seemed to attract Percy, not push him away.

After mini-golf, they went back to the restaurant, which Sally closed early for the night on account of their date. Percy took her back into the kitchen and tossed her an apron, which surprised her.

“Uh, what’s this for?” “We’re gonna make a pizza for each other that we think the other person would like.” Percy shrugged off his jacket and tied his apron behind his back with practiced ease. “And it goes without saying, but no pineapple on mine, please.”

Annabeth toyed with the apron’s strands. “Uh, I should let you know, I’m kind of a walking disaster in the kitchen.”

Percy waved a hand dismissively. “Don’t worry about it. I’ll be watching you every step of the way.”

Despite her apprehension, Annabeth nodded and slipped on her apron. Percy grabbed some dough that had already been proofing in the fridge and showed her how to flatten it into an oblong disk with a rolling pin. He tossed them into the air himself since Annabeth stood a snowball’s chance in hell of pulling that off. After that, he showed her how to ladle the sauce and distribute cheese, but he let her have free reign over the remaining toppings. Since it was a secret, they worked at other ends of the kitchen, but Percy ultimately put the pizzas in the wood-fire oven, although he made a show of closing his eyes so he wouldn’t see her toppings.

Within a minute or two, Percy fished their pizzas out and cut them. Percy’s pizza for her was sausage and black olive, and her pizza for him was Calabrian chilis and feta.

Percy took a bite of a slice and made a sound of surprise. “Wow, this is great. I’ve never tried this combo before.”

“I had it once at a restaurant back when I lived in San Francisco,” Annabeth said. “It was one of my favorites there. I didn’t know you guys had Calabrian chili’s here, otherwise I would have ordered it.”

Percy nodded and then motioned for her to try hers as well. “It’s delicious.”

“I’m glad you think so,” Percy said, smiling. “Ever since I was a kid, if I was having a bad day or we were celebrating something or just because, my Ma would make a sausage and olive pie for me. It’s my favorite food.”

“It’s a good choice,” Annabeth said softly. “Could be improved with some pineapple though.”

That made him shake with laughter, and something about the sight of him sitting on the countertop, hiding his smile behind a hand like it wasn’t worth seeing, stirred something in her.

She craned up to kiss him, catching him by surprise. Instead of melting into the kiss, he broke away and met her eyes with a hard look on his face.

Panic and hurt rushed through her, but Percy whispered, “This- look, I know you only meant it as a joke earlier, but this isn’t all to like fulfill some bad boy fantasy or something, right?”

“It’s not, Percy,” Annabeth said quickly. “Why would you think that?”

He averted his gaze and said, “I, uh, have had bad experiences in the past with girls like building this weird idea of me in their heads, and then they’d get disappointed that I wasn’t what they wanted me to be. And like, that’s fine, but I really, really like you Annabeth, and I- I’m not sure-”

“Hey, listen to me,” Annabeth said, putting a hand on his cheek. “I like you. Like a lot. It’s honestly a little scary how much. The whole bad boy thing was an insensitive thing to say, I didn’t mean that, and I promise that’s not what I like about you or even how I think of you, okay?”

“Okay,” Percy whispered. He pulled her closer to him, hands resting on her hips, and put his forehead against hers. “Sorry for fucking up our first kiss.”

Annabeth breathed a laugh and leaned in to steal a kiss. “Oh, don’t worry about that. We have plenty of time to make up for it.”

[imaginedreamwrite]

#1 is definitely Marshmallow and Ransom. He has to do something (like a meeting or maybe some paper work), but then he sees Marshmallow and all he can think about is her. Maybe, she isn't even in her best/sexiest outfit - for Ransom seeing her gorgeous face, a little peak on her boobs and ass is enough to want ravish her somewhere in the office.

You crack the door open and peek your head in, first wanting to feel sorry for the absolute boredom Ransom is experiencing as he listens to whoever is speaking, however that sorry feeling is quickly squandered and replaced with a need for petty revenge. Whether Ransom expects it or not, he had instilled your need for revenge after he had unceremoniously left you to deal with mandatory HR meetings while he had wandered off to a business lunch wearing a Tom Ford suit with buttons undone.

It was unfair and unjust, the way he walked around like sex on legs, and even if he had brought you back your favourite dessert and a frozen hot chocolate, you wanted vengeance.

“How much longer?” Ransom scowled at the other mama secretary, annoyed that it was her and not you.

Serves him right for being distracted and handsy when you were around. He needed to focus.

“Mr. Drysdale?” Part one of your revenge was making temporary contact. “I just have an inquest I need you to sign.”

When he turned to look at you there was a moment of falter, a moment where you could visibly see and detect every emotion that crossed his face. It was a bold shift that no one else seemed to pay any mind to, nor did they seem to want to.

“Y/N,” he spoke your name through gritted teeth and anyone else would’ve seen a man who was angered, but you saw him fro what he was, a man who was lustful, “bring it here.”

You slipped into the room and turned your back to him to shut the door with a soft click. As you’d turned you felt his eyes dropping to the curve of your hips and ass as the material of your skirt had exemplified the shape that drove Ransom wild. It was a momentary pause that someone could have taken as nervousness however it was just a ploy to get under your boss’ skin.

“Move at a glacial pace, its thrilling.” The man who Ransom was meeting had quipped with irritation, and your soft muttered apology was as fake as the inquest.

“Shut the fuck up,” Ransom’s retort was chilling, the order crackling in the room as the businessman opposite your boss and lover had snapped his mouth shut, “nails on a fucking chalkboard.”

“Sir,” you stooped low and slapped the paper on the table, feeling the heat of Ransom’s gaze on your cleavage, the sight of your breasts trapped beneath a plain cream coloured silk blouse with buttons begins to be ripped off, had truly irritated him, “just a quick form.”

Ransom’s groan was hearty. It was heard in the room with intensity that drew curious eyes, and the other secretary had smirked as if she was anticipating you receiving admonishment from Ransom. It was clear they thought you were incompetent, and that’s why you weren’t in the meeting with them, however if they knew the truth…

“That should be all.” You swiped the paper from him the moment he completed his name and turned away, giving him another look at your ass and hips before you slipped from the room.

It was clear that your ploy worked due to the message arriving on your phone before you’d even sat back down at your desk.

Fuck you for looking so goddamn gorgeous today

I hate you

I mean I don’t hate you

I love you

But I hate you for looking so pretty today

You smirked to yourself, proud of what you’d accomplished and had started to revel in your victory when another unannounced message came through.

Cancel all other meetings, I need to have a face to face with you. Someone needs to get reprimanded

[tainbocuailnge]

Not only literary references but sometimes I feel like they miss references to things within the Nasuverse itself. Sometimes it just feels like they don't properly convey, or even fully understand, the personality and nuances of the characters they're translating. Maybe I'm just being nitpicky but I've noticed multiple instances where the translation technically isn't incorrect but it fails to convey the proper message in very subtle but pretty significant ways.

With this I'm not saying the NA translation is bad, and I'm very grateful it exists. As you said it's pretty great when it comes to dialogues, puns, and preserving the comedic effects, and in general I think it reads pretty well. I just wish they paid more attention to details and understood some references.

oh absolutely, the overall product is pretty good quality but there's a lot of points where i feel their translation just lacks elegance and fails to properly convey the nuance of what's actually being said even if it's not technically an incorrect translation. and it's precisely because they're so good at preserving the feel of casual speech that it's even more frustrating that they can't do the same for more subtle things, because it's not like they wouldn't be able to properly convey what's there if they just noticed that it's there.

to bring up another lb3 moment that i'll forever be mad about, when qin shi huang kills jing ke and says they'll be sure to remember her this time, in japanese they specifically use a turn of phrase that ive seen two separate fantranslations translate as "we shall carve your name into our heart" to invoke the image of like, taking a knife and carving it in there, which the english translation is missing. cu alter's interludes also had me mad as fuck with how none of the translations were technically wrong but they still ended up significantly changing the mood of what he's saying (he's being way more considerate than the english version makes it seem. btw.)

my gut says there's a manpower aspect to the problem here because it feels unfair to assume plain lack of interest from the translators when they do put significant care in stuff like osakabehime's speech patterns + fate is notoriously difficult to translate + they're on a tight schedule here. so my take is that worldwide top earning mobile game fate/grand order distributed internationally by aniplex of america should take some of that gacha money and use it to hire some extra people who can do the necessary literature research and get the necessary phd in buddhism.

[philosophicalparadox]

The thing I like about Berserk most of all, ironically for me, is that the characters are dominantly human.

I usually never like the human characters or root for the human side in Man Vs Monster tropes, cause humans are usually dicks being unfair and judgemental and most man v monster is just Catholics vs Jews or Catholics vs. Protestants, or Catholics vs Heretics of any other flavor 2.0

But Berserk doesn't play by those rules, ironically - VERY ironically, considering there's a whole arc dedicated to the Holy See and Catholic church torturing heretics for funsies.

But that is exactly what I love about Berserk - there's no “man must become a monster in order to defeat one”, no - man is already a monster, plain and simple. Anyone, anywhere, can become a monster in the right circumstances - and those circumstances are A) not at all universal and B) not always tragic or relatable or heroic. They're often vile, disturbing, disgusting. Hypocritical. Nasty. I wont go into detail - if you've read Berserk, you already know.

But that is how it is - everyone has their reasons, everyone has their moments - and they're not always pretty, or justified, or sane. Sometimes the person in those moments thinks so - but often in Berserk you see people, ordinary humans, doing heinous things knowing they are doing something injurious or harmful, purely because they can, or they want to, or because they think they'll be rewarded in some way. Inquisitors torturing innocent people because they think God will reward them is among the least of it. Hell, the Band of the Hawk is unto itself a Mercenary Band. Judeau said himself they had all types of folk in their rank - that they didn't care about pasts, only futures. Criminals, bandits, you name it. Judeau himself was a performer - not a nice thing to be back then - Corkus was a common bandit/petty theif. They had decent folk the same; second sons would have been trained knights without a title, not that being a knight made one at all decent. Plenty of nasty, rapey ones existed.

Point is, the only black and white in Berserk is the colour coding of Griffith and Guts (which is deliberately ironic in multiple ways) and it lays that out right from the start.

Grey. There's so, so, SO MUCH GREY, it's all there is, anywhere, in anyone. There's no virtue without vice. There's arguably the opposite- Wyald comes to mind - but even he is just supremely dark grey. His actions are as despicable as possible, but his reasoning is that of a child. He is so dark he might as well be black, but I still hold that he is just the deepest grey- similarly, Laban is surprisingly very chivalrous, and a genuinely good and honest man. Even in the face of the destruction of everything he knows, he remains virtuous and steadfast. He is mostly white - as white as its possible to get in this story and still be somewhat grey; for even he can't help his humanity and despises those which would assail himself and his country, as a knight ought to I suppose.

What's interesting here, though, is that both our image of the deepest grey and the palest are both side characters. Wyald plays a pretty important role in the plot, but so I would argue does Laban, for what little we see him. He demonstrates that even in a world collapsing, humans can still have hope, and that when calamity strikes is when humans are most keen to band together and support each other in the wake of common circumstances (plague, famine, disaster).

The two main characters however (well, 3 if you count GA Casca) are, despite their respective color palettes, extremely mid. Yes they both do some extreme stuff, but morally they’re both opposite but still similar shades of grey- and personally I’d argue their palettes reflect the exact hues they possess, with Guts actually being the darker, more morally corrupt one. But that’s a post for another day.

Berserk is the ultimate tribute to the Cynic's philosophy. And I am nothing if not a cynical philosopher lol.

[broke-art]

Monkey King x reader new dimension part 1

*The art belongs to the account above the picture on insta. PLEASE FOLLOW THEM. THEY ARE SO GOOD.*

"Y/n.....y/n...Y/N!" Your teacher screamed causing you to jump in your seat.

"Were you even listening?" Mr. Scalic questioned with a disapproving glare.

"Umm...not really." You answered honestly offering an apologetic smile.

Giggles and mutters erupted around you as the teacher walked over to your desk. He stopped infront of you and dropped the large book your class was currently studying on your desk with a deafening thwack.

You jumped once again and the class fell silent. Now all eyes were on you as well as all attention.

"Since you seem so unconcerned with my lesson, you must know everything there is to know about Journey to the West."

You fidgeted on your seat.

"Well I wouldn't say 'Everyth-"

"And since you assume such, you should be very comfortable answering a few of the questions I have for the exam. The exam that you just earned your classmates for tomarrow."

You shrank in your seat as groans filled the classroom. Several students shot you angry glares.

"Yes class, thanks to Y/n here, today is now a review day. The exam will have forty questions and will affect your final grade. Y/n, since you were so helpful I think you could assist me in answering a few of the questions."

You frowned up at the teacher beginning to get annoyed. Punishing you was one thing. However, punishing everyone for you simply getting distracted was plain unfair. And an exam was extreme overkill. Now he was just being a jerk. A jerk you intended to force feed his own medicine.

"Ok."

"Excellent. What is the Monkey King's name?"

"Sun Wukong." You answered directly without a second to think.

Your teacher's eyebrows raised in shock. A few of your peers giggled.

"What was Tripitaka a reincarnation of?"

"The golden cicada."

Your teacher grew an annoyed look and folded his arms.

"What was the village of women called?"

"Women's kingdom is the direct translation." You responded trying not to show how smug you felt.

The bell rang just before your teacher could speak again. He looked downright angry now. You grabbed your book bag and bolted into the hallway and headed to the exit.

School was finally over and you intended to get home before anyone could stop you. You walked to the end of the block and turned left.

While crossing the street, you started to think about journey to the west. You loved the book. And yet somehow, the moment Mr. Scalic had announced that you were studying it this semester you started to get sick of the material.

He made it so boring, and was critical about it in every way. Soon you wanted nothing more than to move on to something else before he ruined the adventures for you entirely.

"Lost are we, little lady?" A man asked grabbing your arm and shoving you into an alleyway.

You yelped when he grabbed you and stumbled at the shove. He wore a red and gray hoodie. The hood was up over his head casting a shadow over his face. The only thing you could see was the man's evil grin.

"Back off." You took off your backpack and held it at the ready. If he came too close you would swing it at him and run.

"Easy now. If you relax this will go much less painfully." The man pulled out a knife, advancing on you a couple steps.

You backed away feeling your gut twist. Knives terrified you. Your father had left you a nasty scar down your back with a knife very similar to the one the man held. You remembered how it had felt vividly. And the memory took most of your attention. So, you didn't notice when you were stepping back. But a bottle was under your foot.

The bottle rolled out from under you when you put your weight on it. You fell backwards and the bottle shot at the man. Shattering on his shin and cutting his leg deeply.

You however, didn't hit the ground. Instead you fell through a dark shadow and kept falling. Then you felt your conciousness slip away.

You awoke to voices speaking around you.

"Is she alright, Sandy?"

"Well I was able to get some of my healing tea in her. I think it will help. She doesn't have any injuries that I can see, and she's breathing. I think she will be ok."

"What do you think Macaque wanted with her?" Came a female voice.

"I don't know....but when she wakes up...maybe she can tell us."

You groaned and slowly opened your eyes. The light was harsh so you blinked against it.

"Good morning!" Chirped a girl with black hair and green streaks.

You flinched at the greeting then sat up slowly.

"Where am I?" You mumbled touching a hand to your head.

A muscular, large man helped you steady your self as your body wobbled some.

"You're safe for now miss..?" The pause indicated he was asking for your name.

"Y/n, Y/n L/n." You supplied simply. "And you all are?"

The blue man gestured to himself.

"My name's Sandy. This is Mei." He gestured to the only girl present and she waved at you with a friendly smile.

And the boy with the staff is M.k also known as the Monkey kid.

M.k rubbed the back of his neck with a nervous smile and waved.

You waved back with a smile.

"What happened?"

The group exchanged glances.

"We were hoping you could tell us." M.k said with a frown.

"All I remember is getting cornered in an alleyway and.... falling through a shadow? You mentioned questioningly.

M.k hummed.

"I caught the six eared Macaque trying to kidnap you." He explained.

"But he saved you!" Mei cheered.

"Macaque? Uhh you mean like from Journey to the west?"

M.k nodded.

You thought for a moment.

"Sandy...like the friend of the Monkey King?" You asked.

Sandy chuckled nervously.

"I wouldn't say 'friends' I uh barely know him."

You blinked a bit.

"It's official, I'm insane."

M.k cocked his head to the side and Mei frowned at you confusedly.

After a couple moments M.k stood straight.

"I should let Monkey King know about this. He might know what to do." Then he offered you a hand.

"What?"

"Don't you want to come? I thought that Monkey King could help us and then we could make sure Macaque can't hurt you again."

You stopped for a moment to contemplate. This could be a dream. And if it was you would never pass up an opportunity to meet your favorite hero. You took M.k's extended hand and allowed him to pull you to your feet.

"Lets do it."

Part 2

M.k carried you on his back, then used his staff to get to flower fruit mountain. Next, you two hiked up the mountain together chatting here and there.

"So you are the Monkey King's successor?" You asked.

"Yeah. Heh heh." M.k chuckled rubbing at his neck. "And you think you're from another dimension?"

You nodded.

"Or dreaming."

M.k chuckled.

"Not likely."

You shrugged.

"Well flower fruit mountain doesn't exist in my world so, I can't be at home."

M.k released an exhausted breath as you two reached the peak of the mountain.

"Well here we are."

You looked around, taking in the beauty of the mountain and the plant life. Suddenly, you saw three baby monkeys jumping up and down. Reaching for bananas in vain as they were too high to reach.

"Awww." You cooed.

The monkeys paused and looked at you frightendly. They froze in place but you kept your distance.

Instead of coming near, you picked a banana from a nearby tree. Then knelt down opening the banana, and holding out a piece.

"Uhh y/n? The Monkey King is this way."

"I know. " You said sweetly. "I just need a little while they looked so hungry."

Slowly, the babies came near and the boldest snatched the first piece from your hand.

You giggled and broke off another piece offering it as well.

A second monkey reached out slowly, keeping it's eyes on you warily.

You remained still so not to spook the monkey.

It took it gently and immediately started to eat.

The last monkey took several minutes but did finally take the food offered. After that you all became fast friends. The baby monkeys chittered and played with you jumping on your shoulders and cuddling you.

You giggled happily playing with them gently before you heard him speak.

"Who's your friend, kid?"

You jumped a bit and turned suddenly. The baby monkeys paused but none seemed to fear the Monkey King. Whom of which, stood next to M.k. A smirk tugged at his lips and he was studying you with a raised eyebrow.

"This is Y/n." M.k responded simply.

"They seem to like you." Monkey King pointed out with a grin.

"U-Uhm. They were hungry....I didn't mean to...I couldn't just-"

Monkey King chuckled.

"I know, I know. Look, I'm gonna come clean. Um... I've been kinda watchin' you."

M.k frowned annoyedly.

"Again?"

Monkey King shrugged.

"I wanted to see how it would play out." He offered you a hand.

You took it and he pulled you to your feet then walked around you in a slow circle.

"So what's a beautiful girl like you doing here with my successor?"

Your cheeks exploded into a blush.

"I-I-I- y-you oh my goodness." You stammered before burying your crimson face in your hands.

M.k grabbed Monkey King's shoulder.

"Monkey King, Macaque tried to kidnap her."

Monkey King froze then turned to M.k folding his arms and raising an eyebrow.

"Why?"

M.k shrugged.

"Neither of us know. And she says she's from another dimension. Do you have any idea what's going on?"

Monkey King held his chin in thought and hummed.

"I'll have to look into it. Do some good old research. But...she is gonna need a place to stay."

You had begun to breathe normally again and let your hands drop. You were about to return to the conversation when M.k spoke.

"She could stay here with you!"

Your face went right back to crimson.

Monkey King chuckled at your reaction.

"I don't think that'll work, kid. She wouldn't last a day out here." He sent you a knowing grin.

This only made your blush darken that much more.

M.k thought for a couple minutes.

"I could ask Mei?"

You nodded almost pleadingly.

M.k groaned as he looked back towards the city.

"Then we came here for nothingggg!"

M.k got ready to carry you on his back again but Monkey King shook his head.

"Don't worry, kid. I'll carry her this time."

M.k looked between you two with a suspicious look before halting on you.

"You ok with that, y/n?"

You felt butterflies explode in your stomach at the suggestion. So, when M.k asked, you could only nod.

"Ok see ya there." M.k shouted before jumping off the mountain.

Monkey King watched him leave then offered you his hand.

"Hate to break it to ya, but the cloud is pretty small I'll have to keep you close. That alright?"

Your lips tugged down at the corners turning into an annoyed frown.

"I feel like you withheld that information on purpose."

"Who? Me? Never." Monkey King wore a smug grin that you deemed entirely unrepentant.

"I guess that's alright." You took his hand. "How exactly are we-"

Monkey King tugged you against him with a grin.

"Hold on tight."

Before you could speak a cloud appeared under the pair of you and took off.

You squeaked and buried your face in his chest on instinct.

Monkey King chuckled.

"Don't worry, I won't drop ya. C'mon take a look around."

You slowly peeked around and gasped at the feeling of flying. If felt so freeing to have the wind in your hair. The sights were breathtaking, but you accidentally looked down.

A terrible mistake, as it made your stomach turn. And caused panic rake up your nerves. You tensed and gripped the Monkey King tighter.

"Ergh! Easy kid." Monkey King lifted your chin gently so your grip eased. "Rule one of flying; never look down."

"Sorry. Did I hurt you?"

Monkey King snickered lightly.

"No, just distracted." He gave you flirtatious smile.

Your cheeks turned ablaze at the look and you glanced away.

Soon you two came to Pigsy's noodles and the Monkey King helped you step off the cloud just as Mei ran out to greet you.

"Y/n! I talked with my parents they said you can stay with us until you get a place of your own!" She exclaimed.

You smiled thankfully.

"Thank you, Mei. I really appreciate it."

Mei grinned.

"It'll be fun to have a new roomie."

Meanwhile a shadowy figure watched from a nearby rooftop. He grinned as his eyes shone a malevolent violet.

"And a perfect way to know exactly where you are, Liánhuā."

Part 3

The sunlight spilled through the curtains of your borrowed room and landed across your face.

You blinked and slowly opened your eyes. The room was entirely unfamiliar. Painted jade with golden dragons etched on each wall. You stared at the walls laying still for a moment.

You wondered what it was like to live in a world like this. School was obviously still a thing. And money worked the same. The laws of physics were at very least slightly altered as M.k shouldn't be able to do half of what he could.

That made you think of home. You didn't have any parents, you had been taking care of yourself. So, no one would really miss you. But would you miss that world? Part of that answer was yes. You didn't belong here.

"Knock, knock! Wake up sleepyhead!" Mei cheered knocking on your door then jumping into your room excitedly.

You smiled at her enthusiasm. And sat up in bed.

"Hey Mei, what's the itinerary for today?"

Mei leapt onto your bed and sat crossing her legs.

"Mom says, 'Y/n can't be expected to stay here without so much as a change of clothes.' So it looks like shopping."

A wave of self-conscious nervousness washed over you.

"I uh don't have any money, Mei. Sorry to disappoint your mom."

Mei shook her head with a laugh.

"I know, silly. Mom gave me her credit card." She held up a golden and green card with a dragon emblem on it. "Buuut the deal was that you have to get atleast two dresses."

You shrugged at the condition nonchalantly. Mei's mother had been generous enough to pay for an entire new wardrobe, she could have her pick of at least two things that were in it. Although you hoped not to spend very much.

"Well, get up! We can grab some breakfast on the way and then hit the arcade after M.k gets off work."

You nodded and got out of bed dressing in the clothes you had landed here with.

You and Mei hit a cafe getting some breakfast and chatting here and there before heading to a large shopping center.

In all fairness, you weren't big on shopping and you mostly went to small inexpensive stores. So, when you stepped into a massive mall your jaw dropped.

Mei giggled at your reaction behind a hand and snapped a picture of you.

"Hey!" You giggled and tried to snatch her phone only for her to bolt into what you guessed was a popular clothes store. You followed suit smiling the whole time.

Mei was a whiz at shopping fast and shopping smart. She found well priced clothes amiss the overpriced brands, seemed to have a good understanding of the sizes and what to look for, and a general pleasant fashion sense. The whole of the trip only took you a few hours. That was until the dresses came into play.

Mei loathed dresses and made that very clear. The dress stores seemed to annoy her the most and she would almost hiss at the dresses themselves.

You giggled and picked out the two dresses rather quickly, opting to go for their family's favorite color scheme. Green and gold and preferably anything with a dragon on it.

"You don't have to get dresses that looked like my mom picked them ya know." Mei informed as you showed her your most recent pick.

It was a dress that adorned a dragon emblem on the chest and was white sprinkled with green symbols and laced with gold.

"Are you sure? Cause I feel like your mom would disagree. She is paying after all."

Mei went to speak, but paused when the two of you heard a whistle.

"Nice dress Y/n." Monkey King's voice caught your attention from your left. "Course that's cause you're wearing it."

Monkey King strode towards you two in a hoodie with a boba tea in his hand.

"M-Monkey King?! What are you doing here?!" You gasped feeling your cheeks explode with a blush.

"Oh ya know, checking up on you," Monkey king threw you a smirk and looked you over. "Seein' the sights."

Your face heated even more at the flirt. And to your extreme embarrassment you saw a camera flash.

"Aww! Y/n, you're blushing!" Mei cooed teasingly resting her head on her palms.

"Oh hush!" You huffed and went back into the dressing room to change. Once you finished and calmed down you walked out to see Monkey King leaning against the wall.

"If you don't mind my saying so, I think you should get that one." Monkey King quipped. "It brings out your eyes."

Speaking of eyes; his golden eyes were trained on you with an intensity that made your stomach explode into butterflies. But you ignored the feeling as best you could. You didn't want to make a fool of yourself.

"Th-Thank you. That's very sweet of you." You offered him a small smile and Monkey King returned it revealing his sharp fangs.

"Of course. Oh, but there is one more thing." Monkey King's tone turned serious. "I need you to keep your head down for a while. And stay by Mei or M.k as much as possible. Just until we can figure out what it is that Macaque wants."

You nodded obediently.

"And here you could have just asked." A low voice rang out with a chuckle.

You jumped and Monkey King pressed you behind him.

A black Monkey walked towards you with a smirk.

"Jumpy aren't we, Liánhuā?" He addressed you. Leaning to the side so he could see you.

Monkey King growled and you shrank a bit behind him.

"Leave her alone."

"Ohoho easy there. I thought you wanted to know what I wanted." Macaque seemed entirely relaxed.

"Well if you're so accommodating why don't you just say it." Monkey King shot back growing a confident grin.

"Then we agree." Macaque mused.

Suddenly you were ripped downwards into a shadow under you. You gasped then suddenly felt a stabbing pain in your right calf. A scream escaped you as Monkey King whipped around and grabbed you around the waist.

You you wrapped your arms around the back of his neck and he pulled you up with a swift tug. But when Monkey King turned back around Macaque was gone.

Monkey King looked confused and angry but then Mei spoke.

"Y/n! Your leg is bleeding!"

You looked down to see you leg dibbling blood. Claw marks were gouged into your leg.

Monkey King frowned and his eyes shone gold.

"Oh no."

"W-What?!" You asked as he lifted you up bridal style.

"Mei tell M.k I'm taking her to flower fruit mountain, send him over as soon as possible." With that he jumped on his cloud and carried you towards the mountain.

Slowly, your energy began slipping away.

"Monkey King....what's ...happening to me." You mumbled tiredly.

"Don't worry Y/n I'm going to take care of you." He looked down at you worriedly.

Meanwhile

Macaque watched Monkey King jet off with a malicious grin.

"That's right. You go look for a cure to that poisonous cut." He held up a vial of your blood. "And I'll ensure little Liánhuā will do for my needs."

Part 4

You awoke in a soft bed with Monkey King standing over you. A concerned frown tugging at the corners of his lips.

"Y/n! How are you feeling?"

You allowed your gaze to wander around the room.

"Tired. Where am I?"

Monkey King sighed.

"Flower fruit mountain. I had to get the poison out of your leg."

"Poison?" You questioned absent-mindedly looking at your leg.

"Heh. You're gonna be a little disoriented." Monkey King warned as you sat up.

It was true, your head felt foggy, and your hands were trembling.

"How'd you-" your strength vanished and you fell back.

Monkey King lunged forward, caught you, and then gently laid you back down.

"I used a medicine from an old friend. But it'll take a while to fight the poison. And moving you is out of the question." He mumbled.

You studied him and noticed his tail flicking nervously. But more than this, he held a guilty look.

"Sun." You said weakly. The fog still made it difficult to think but you wanted to talk to him so, you tried to resist it.

Monkey King's head snapped towards you at the name. He looked shocked and almost hurt.

"It wasn't your fault." You muttered resting your hand on his.

Monkey King chuckled lightly.

"You should probably get some rest."

Slowly, you shook your head.

"I want to talk to you."

Monkey King rested his head on a hand and sat on his tail.

"You're pretty stubborn, aren't cha? Alright, talk away."

You watched him for a moment.

"Do you always pretend to be relaxed when you're worried?"

Monkey King was taken aback by your question, but gave you a smile.

"I'm not worried, kid. You'll be fine in no time."

"If you aren't worried then why are you sitting on your tail?"

"Cause its comfortable." He gave you a smirk coupled with a look that implied his previous statement should be obvious.

"Typically, I might believe you, but the fact that you rarely ever do it makes me doubt that. M.k told me when you are relaxing you normally sit on your cloud."

Monkey King chuckled.

"There's more than one way to relax, kid."

"Yeah, but your tail was flicking just a few moments ago. Are you sure you're not putting weight on it to avoid that habit?"

Monkey King stared at you for a moment. Then chuckled almost nervously.

"Let's change the subject. Why did you call me 'sun'?"

You shrugged a bit.

"Because it's part of your name. And what was easiest to say."

Monkey King quirked an eyebrow at you.

"So you've heard of me....But you're from another dimension?"

You nodded.

"You're more or less a fairy tale there." And suddenly you felt your gut twist. You didn't like the notion of Monkey King being a fairy tale.

"Ah...so does everyone there call me 'Sun'?"

"No, they call you 'The Monkey King' or, 'The Great Sage' and stuff like that. But your name is Sun Wukong, isn't it?"

Monkey King flinched at the name then chuckled resignedly.

"Yeah. I haven't been called that in...forever." Monkey King exhaled deeply seemingly lost in thought.

"Does... Does being immortal make having friends difficult?" You asked gently.

Monkey King gave you a shocked glance, then rubbed the back of his neck with a forced grin. His hand tilted this way and that indicating so,so.

"Eh, sometimes. Actually I was meaning to breach that subject..." He trailed off nervously.

"What do you mean?"

Monkey King lowered himself off his tail onto his knees. And despite trying to hide it his tail flicked agitatedly.

"I uh I have a confession to make."

You frowned.

"What is it?"

"Well...that medicine I was talking about. It wasn't exactly medicine, and I didn't get it from a friend." Monkey King seemed to be looking for the words.

"So, you lied to me."

Monkey King winced at the word.

"Sort of. Just try to stay calm while I explain." He held up a peach and suddenly the pieces clicked in your head.

"You gave me a peach of immortality?!"

Monkey King nodded with a nervous smile.

"Well on the bright side you'll heal."

You stared at him for a moment and tried to think. Would the peach's effects be nullified when you went home? Would you even be able to get home? Living forever sounded cool in some ways but terrifying in others.

"Kid? Kid, you alright?" Monkey King gently tapped your shoulder.

"Yeah...it's just a lot to take in." You murmured almost more to yourself than to him. Then a question hit you and you spoke before you could think about it. "How am I going to get home?"

Monkey King looked taken aback by the question then hummed in thought.

"That's a good question. I know there are certain glyphs that can open doorways. That's one way of getting to the celestial realm. Maybe with the right glyphs we could send you home." The idea was promising but his tone sounded doubtful.

"Then why do you sound so upset?"

The monkey King sighed.

"Because the chance of finding the exact glyphs in the exact layout that we need is one in billions of chances."

Your stomach dropped. So, you were stuck here. Maybe forever. And to top off the dread cake was the cherry of a fact that you were now immortal.

"But-" Monkey King silenced your thoughts with an interjection. "If Macaque tried to kidnap you, then he should know the proper glyphs and layout."

Relief cut loose the weight in your chest. But reservations remained.

"But I don't think he is going to tell me them. Or you for that matter?"

Monkey King nodded but folded his arms.

"You can leave that to me. You just concentrate on healing."

You relaxed and allowed the fog to take over sending you into blissful sleep.

Monkey King watched you slip off into sleep then glanced at how his tail flicked.

He chuckled lightly shaking his head. How had y/n read him like a book? He could fool most anyone if he tried hard enough. But she saw through him entirely.

She looked so serene when she slept. Just then he felt a pang of guilt that she had been poisoned. And with him standing right there too. He felt like kicking himself. And what's more the poison was shadow bane a concoction Macaque had discovered when they were young. To Monkey King's knowledge there was no cure. Except the peach.

He thought back to the panicked moments he had when he raced in here with you.

Memory

Monkey King jumped from his cloud and laid you on his bed hurriedly. Then he looked at your wound triggering his eyes to see the issue. Your veins were beginning to turn black. Now your blood that spilled from the wound had changed to a royal purple hue.

He instantly recognized the effects of shadow bane and his blood ran cold. You would die in minutes and there was no real cure. Panic welled in his chest and he whirled around frantically scanning the collection of objects he had collected from his travels.

Nothing of consequence caught his eye and the panic began transforming into dread. Just at that moment, his eyes landed on the immortal peaches. Hope sparked in his chest just at the same moment hesitation made him freeze.

Y/n would be immortal like him! She would live and this nightmare would be over. But on the other hand could she handle watching her love ones pass away before her? Could she handle how lonely it was? Then again, he would be there. He could keep her company.

That thought made butterflies swirl in his stomach. But what about when she went home? Time was fleeting and hers was almost up. Y/n's breathing began to shallow. He couldn't let her die.

Monkey snatched a peach and smashed it into a juice in a bowl. Then he rushed back to her tipping the contents of the bowl into her mouth. He tried to take it slow so he wouldn't choke her. But if the juice didn't make it into her system on time she would die.

The juice vanished and a few moments passed slowly. Monkey King held his breath praying she would breathe normally again. Then her breathing returned to normal.

Monkey King exhaled a sigh of relief then sat next to her waiting. Waiting for her to wake up anxiously.

End of memory

Macaque had certainly done a number on him without so much as a punch. But why try to kill y/n? She didn't remember the kidnapping, so she hadn't seen anything worth killing over. And hadn't M.k interrupted? Whatever Macaque wanted he likely hadn't gotten it.

Was y/n hiding something? Unlikely, she seemed confused as the rest of them. So, poisoning her didn't make any sense. Unless-

Monkey King looked at the peaches. Macaque knew well enough that he had them. What if he had known what Monkey King would do if forced?

Monkey King sighed. So Macaque had won this round. So what? He'd protect y/n from now on. Monkey King glanced back down at her. She wasn't leaving his sight from now on.

The next few weeks you slept at Monkey King's hut. He fed you and kept you company. The others came and visited but only every now and again.

When M.k finished work he would come for training and you would sit up, even though Monkey King had scolded you several times over it, and watch them through the window.

The sheer power Monkey King had blew your mind. You had read all of his legends of course. But seeing the power in action was something else. And his confidence.made your heart flutter.

One such day Monkey King was avoiding M.k's strikes with relative ease and in a movement he turned and spied you watching. You shrunk a bit in your hiding spot expecting him to scold you, but instead he smirked.

Monkey King sent you a wink then flipped aside just in time to dodge another attack with astounding speed.

Your cheeks burned crimson as you realized he was showing off for you. The entire training session he seemed to go out of his way to show off making butterflies full your stomach. Soon enough, they finished their training for the day and M.k sped off.

Monkey King, on the other hand, turned looking directly at you. You jumped a bit but smiled shyly and offered a wave.

In a blink Monkey King was gone. You blinked a few times and looked around.

"Miss me already, peaches?"

You yelped and fell backwards. You slipped off the bed. You squeezed your eyes shut and tensed for impact. That was when you hit something softer than the floor but still firm.

You open your eyes and realized Monkey King had caught you against his chest. He lifted you back onto the bed carefully.

"Sorry kid I didn't mean to scare you." He apologized setting you down.

"You didn't scare me, just startled is all. Also, 'peaches'?" You asked tilting your head curiously.

Monkey King grinned and you could have swore you saw his cheeks twinge pink.

"Ya like it? It suits you."

A smile crossed your lips and you nodded.

"I do like it actually. So, I get to call you Sun then."

Monkey King chuckled.

"Sure thing, peaches."

After a few more days Sun helped you to stand. You would lean on him as you relearned to walk. Of course you fell dozens of times, but Sun was always there to catch you. Often times he would flirt and mess with you so you wouldn't take the failures too hard.

You appreciated his efforts. And soon you grew a tender place in your heart for the Monkey King.

Sun adored how stubborn y/n was. She'd look so determined everytime he offered to help her walk. She would try and do it on your own if he didn't watch her carefully enough. Catching her was his guilty pleasure in all honesty. When she stumbled his heart would skip a beat and he would dash to catch her.

Y/n would fall against his chest everytime. And for a blissful few moments he got to hold her against him. The position felt so right. And a couple times he could have swore y/n had leaned into his chest a bit more than necessary.

But soon enough you healed fully. You were able to walk and Mei insisted that you should come to her house. You agreed wholeheartedly feeling terribly guilty for stealing Monkey King's bed from him for so long.

He seemed slightly disappointed when you told him you were ready to leave. Although he tried to hide it behind smiles and reassurances. You saw how his tail drooped and your heart broke.

"I'll visit as soon as possible." You promised as Monkey King helped you to step off his cloud.

Monkey King's tail perked up slightly at the news and he smirked.

"I'll be waiting."

Then he flew away and you waved goodbye as Mei hugged you tightly.

"Someone's got a crush~" she sang next to you with a smirk.

Instantly your cheeks burned red and you shook your head.

"Mei!"

Meanwhile the shadows of a nearby alleyway cloaked a black Monkey who listened intently to every word.

"Crush hm? Oh this will be perfect."

Part 5

You had barely entered your room when the door slammed behind you. You whirled only to see Macaque standing behind the door with one hand on it.

"Hello, Liánhuā." He smirked. Suddenly, a shadow grabbed you from behind and pressed a cloth over your mouth and nose.

Meanwhile

Monkey King landed near his hut with a small grunt as he jumped off his cloud. He entered the little shelter and glanced around. Everything looked so lifeless without her there.

Y/n had brought a glow to the old hut that Monkey King just couldn't explain. Just at that moment, a branch snapped behind him and his ear twitched. It was likely only one of his subjects, but he turned anyway. The moment he turned, two of Macaque's shadows ran past him on either side, between them a net made from spider Queen's special webbing.

Before he could even attempt to dodge, he was bound in the stuff. Monkey King growled and tried to rip it, but in a moment the web sucked the energy out of him painfully. He released a pained yell as one of the shadows chuckled.

"Nice to see you again, bud."

Then his vision went black.

Later on.

Monkey King blinked awake slowly. His vision was blurred with an odd ringing in his ears.

"Sun! Sun Wukong help!"

Instantly the blurry vision sharpened into focus and the ringing vanished. Then he almost wished it hadn't.

Y/n was chained to the wall with her arms above her head and Macaque stood only a pace away twirling a syringe.

"Good job, Liánhuā. Wouldn't want to start the party without the good ol' Monkey King. Now would we?"

Y/n struggled in her restraints and Monkey King tried to move only to be slammed by blinding pain.

"Macaque, what are you doing!?" He growled through clenched teeth.

"Oh don't you know?" Macaque smirked and walked closer to Y/n. "I'm showing you what I want with her." With that he punctured her arm taking her blood.

Y/n screamed in pain then slowly began to look very weak.

"Get away from her!" Monkey King roared and thrashed In the webbing ignoring the pain. "Macaque let her go! She has nothing to do with you. I'm the one you want!"

Macaque chuckled.

"And lose the opportunity to watch you beg? Heh. Not a chance."

Monkey King stared as Macaque pulled the syringe away. Then he set it down and picked up another.

"Fun thing about these is they take atleast ten times the amount they seem to hold. After a couple more I'll have everything I need."

Monkey King growled as Y/n passed out.

"And what'll happen to Y/n then?"

Macaque offered him an evil grin.

"Take a wild guess."

Monkey King's eyes widened then he thrashed harder than before.

"What do you even need her. Blood for?! Especially that much?!"

Macaque chuckled.

"An ancient spell the lady bone demon taught me in exchange for my loyalty. With the blood of an immortal from another world, I can transfer all of yours and the Monkie Kid's power to me. After the spell is completed you'll die." Macaque smirked over his shoulder. "But that's just a perk."

Monkey King's heart sunk. Y/n would die soon and it would be all his fault. Suddenly he spotted a sharp rock a few feet away. While Macaque worked he slid slightly closer.

"But if you beg me to, I just might let her live." Macaque taunted crooking a finger under her chin and tilted her head up.

Monkey King barely caught his temper. He had to focus on escaping instead of Macaque's taunts even if it meant letting him lay a hand on Y/n for now. But he swore to himself he'd make Macaque regret it. He scooted over then started to work on sawing through webbing.

"Silent huh?" Macaque turned and Monkey king froze. "You must not care about her either. I should have known." Macaque scoffed. "You have a habit with using people, don't you?"

Monkey King bit his tongue and sawed faster. Finally the webs snapped and in an instant he lunged at Macaque.

A few hours later.

You groaned and coughed a bit as your mind started to awaken.

"Come on, peaches. Just a little more." Someone far away urged gently.

You felt something press against your lips, then cold liquid poured down your throat. Something about the liquid stirred your senses and urged you to wake fully.

You blinked your eyes open and smiled at the sight.

Monkey King leaned over you with a desperately worried look. The instant your gazes locked he sighed in relief.

"How are you feeling, peaches?"

You stretched a bit and a pain shot up your arm.

"Ah! My arm is killing me." You muttered.

Monkey King frowned.

"Yeah, loosing that much blood would leave a sizable bruise."

"Loosing what?!" You gasped sitting up suddenly. Instantly, you regretted the action as pain seared through your head. You fell back and landed against Monkey King's chest.

"I uh...I have something else to tell you." He sounded resigned and almost heartbroken.

"What is it?"

Monkey King gave you a forced, sad smile.

"I found your ticket home."

Part 6

Your heart leapt at the news then immediately sunk.

"Wa-Wait? You mean you found it?"

Monkey King nodded with a smile.

"In Macaque's lair after we got out."

You frowned and thought for a moment.

"Do you...Do you want me to go?"

Monkey King stared at you then started rubbing the back of his neck.

"Well...you want honesty?"

You nodded hopefully.

"Then...no. Sorry, peaches." He looked away guilty.

You took his face in your hands.

"Good. Because I don't want to go. I want to stay here. With you."

Monkey King's eyes lit up and he grinned.

"Really?!"

A giggle slipped from your lips and you nodded.

In that instant Monkey King kissed you passionately.

Your eyes widened then slowly slipped shut and you returned the kiss with a smile.

Now was the beginning of your own personal happily ever after, and you intended to follow it. Besides, you weren't sure about time differences between worlds but atleast you'd miss that pop quiz you caused. Although, now you were positive you would answer every question perfectly.

[dandymaximilian]

I feel like a fundamental quality of stuffed toys in the Toy Story universe is that their purpose isn't meant to be played with, but to be cuddled with. Being shown affection all around seen as a big honour for a toy, but usually kids only bring their stuffed animals to bed. (Andy was just a unusual child.)

Like, the bond between toys and their "kid" usually is strengthened within groups, within a hierarchy based on their roles in imagined play, and how much the toy is played with in general. Woody was Andy's favourite, and he was the hero. Buzz became his new favourite, and he was also a hero. Thus, creating a conflict within the hierarchy.

This is all thrown out of the window with stuffed toys.

Sure, they can be used in imagined play, but their purpose isn't to be played with. Instead, it's to provide comfort to their "kid." Therefore, the bond between a stuffed toy and their owner surpasses even the most treasured toy in the collection, because they are there for their "kid" when they are at their most vulnerable.

I think this is what is misunderstood about Lotto's character. As the audience see in Woody and Stinky Pete, lacking a purpose is enough to drive a toy mad. It's as if their worse qualities are brought out, bringing about a desperation that drives them to do terrible deeds, just so they get the attention they were literally created for.

For Woody, he needs to be played with. Plain and simple. Yet, he also needs to be a hero and a leader, because this was his role in Woody's Roundup, ingrained in his very fabric of being.

For Stinky Pete, any positive attention will do, as long as he is perceived. He was the comic relief in Woody Roundup. He was created with the purpose of making people smile and laugh. So being abandoned on the shelf, ignored, was his worse nightmare, the epitome of hell itself.

(His ending of becoming an art piece for a child was actually his best possible fate. Sure, he had an initial bad reaction to this, but in becoming a silly artsy toy, he will ultimately fufill his role as comic relief in playtime. He didn't really want to hurt the main cast at the end of the day, he just needed to be loved, so he faced no real karma.)

Lotso, on the other hand, needs to be a child's entire world. He needs to be snuggled with, he needs to be the listener, and the pacifier. He even smells like strawberries, just so he can comfort his owner. Heck, his name is even Lots-o'-Huggin' Bear!

The guy wasn't meant for group play, nor was he meant to have multiple owners. He was fully independent, and therefore, self centered by nature.

In the scene where Lotso was replaced with an identical, he basically had an existential crisis. He becomes the only member of the entire series who truly understands how unfair and wrong their existence truly is. His heart was crushed, and it never came back after that.

In finding out that he is fundamentally no different to his owner than any other lotso, something broke within his psyche.

Toys are meaningless to children at the end of the day. They are simply a future piece of trash, bound by a system designed by oppressive creatures toys can't help but crave the attention of. He even says the latter to the main cast, and I genuinely think that he believes it.

"I didn't throw you away; your kid did! Ain't one kid ever love a toy really! Chew on that when you're at the dump!"

"This is what happens when you DUMMIES TRY TO THINK! WE'RE ALL JUST TRASH WAITIN' TO BE THROWN AWAY! THAT'S ALL A TOY IS!"

So, Lotso took matters in to his own hands to gain some sense of control in his life.

He designated any threats to the room with destructive children, or had the toys join him. He created an oppressive environment within the daycare, and created a superficial hierarchy to put himself on top. A horrible thing to do, but it's what he felt was necessary so that he can fulfill his purpose without risk of being replaced again.

It's notable that none of the toys he picked for his gang feature another stuffed toy. I imagine stuffed toys were the first to be be sent to the dumpster, unless they aren't popular amongst the children, perhaps.

I don't think Lotso did this to "spite" any toy, despite what the flashback might suggest. His line, "If I can't have (Daisy), no one can," stems from his insecurity of being obsolete. His real karma comes not from being a foil to Woody, like Stinky Pete was, but in abandoning the main cast in the dump out of petty revenge.

I think Lotto's terrible fate is perfect. He was willing to let the main cast die in the incinerator, so he faced a punishment worse than death as a result. Trapped on a dump truck, surrounded by and treated like trash, next to toys, never to fufill his purpose. And even if he escaped, no child would ever love a trash embedded toy.