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zwy01 · 1 year ago

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Original Noble Clan + Clan Leader OCs!!!

Yay!! Super excited to introduce my fourth original clan, the Paradiso, Clan of Miracles and Wisdom!

About a month ago, I introduced three original clans: the “Volo”, Clan of the Healers, the “Pyradros”, Clan of the Sun and Fire, and the “Ceresthalassa”, Clan of the Earthshakers. It’s time for a fourth one yayy!!!! p.s. I have the links to my other original clan introductions at the end of this post, so feel free to check them out later!

Again, these characters aren’t necessarily exclusive to a specific/fixed setting. They can be interpreted as headcanons that exist/fit in the canon storyline, characters specific to my Millennium AU, characters that exist by themselves and don’t fit anywhere,…etc. Anything really, as I do want them to have some flexibility. So feel free to interpret them as whatever makes the most sense to you. Personally, I see them as existing in both the canon storyline as my headcanons, and in my Millennium AU. In this post I’ll be (mainly) approaching and discussing them in the context of my Millennium AU, though there will also be some references to canon/pre-canon events of my interpretation.

For context, age-wise Titus the Clan Leader is somewhere between Gejutel and Lagus. So older than Gejutel, but younger than Lagus. In terms of title/position, Titus was appointed as Clan Leader either during or even before the Previous-previous Lord’s (Raskreia’s paternal grandfather, another OC of mine) reign. He’s old! Currently, he is still active as Clan Leader in Raskreia’s reign, so technically he can be grouped with the current generation of Clan Leaders (aka Raskreia’s peers). He simply loves his job too much to retire, which makes him Doris’ refuse-to-retire buddy, lmao. Titus’ twin daughters and heirs Anastasia and Anabella are actually younger than Raskreia and my other original clan kids (Azurine, Rufus, Marina), and possibly even younger than some of Raskreia’s peers. Titus just kind of had his kids super late, just like Lagus and Doris.

The Paradiso Clan is a bit of an unusual one. They are the only non-combat based noble clan in Lukedonia. You have the Mergas, who are more focused on defense, and the Volo, who specialize in support such as buffs, debuffs, healing… etc. but in the end they can still fight pretty impressively when it comes to offense. The Paradiso is a completely different case. Their clan simply has nothing to do with fighting at all. Just nothing. They aren’t interested in fighting, and can’t fight even if they tried. Well, they can do the simple stuff. Nothing fancy. Basic moves such as punches and kicks, and small aura beam blasts, sure. But that’s pretty much it. This puts them on the very, very bottom of Lukedonia’s power scale when it comes to raw power. On the surface, this may seem like a great weakness, and maybe even something abnormal, but the reason behind this is much deeper.

The Paradiso were never meant to fight in the first place. None of its clan members receive any combat training in their education and upbringing, as opposed to basically all the other clans, to whom learning how to fight is both essential and mandatory. Instead, the Paradiso are interested in something else. Rather than wasting effort on things that would never become their forte, they invest all their time and resources in improving themselves and thriving in the way that aligns with their clan’s specialty the most. Since the very beginning, starting with their first ever Clan Leader, the Paradiso’s role in Lukedonia is to preserve. Specifically, the safekeeping of all kinds of knowledge, including but not limited to: old and new noble traditions, the rise and fall of noble factions, the beginning and end of eras, the reign of each and every Lord and their respective beliefs and leadership approaches, transcribing works of literature/language/philosophy etc. And this goes beyond just knowledge passed down within their own clan. The Paradiso keeps records safe on behalf of the entirety of Lukedonia, which includes the work and traditions of all noble clans.

It doesn’t stop there. While the priority of the Paradiso’s preservation work is centered around information inside Lukedonia, they are avid collectors of all kinds of knowledge. They are enthusiastic fans of folklore, fables, poetry, drama, fantasy, legends, biographies, memoirs, journals, cookbooks, and much more. Authors of the works they collect could be anyone. Nobles, humans, occasionally werewolves, and maybe even supernatural beings and creatures. As long as it’s interesting, the Paradiso are in. They welcome to their collection great works from around the world, and are always seeking for new ones to fuel their love of knowledge. In addition, many of their own clan members are established authors and creators. While these noble creators usually don’t publish their works outside of Lukedonia for non-nobles to read, occasionally, they’d trade a book or two with a human/werewolf creator as a means of obtaining knowledge. Usually, the Paradiso would buy works from members of other races with money or things, but every now and then one of them demands “an exchange of equal value”, so they exchange book for book. After the Paradiso get their hands on a new book, they would go home to Lukedonia, gather one of their many teams of scholars, analyze the material, transcribe it a couple times, then store some of the transcribed copies and the original in safety somewhere in their vast library tower. Their collection of books is ever growing. Truly the deeds of the clan of wisdom. As for the Paradiso’s special ability, since they can’t fight, their strength manifests in a different way. They aren’t called the “walking libraries” for no reason. Aside from their innate love of knowledge, they are born with the talent of being able to very quickly and thoroughly dissect and master any material presented to them. They learn much more efficiently, and can retain and recall information at a much higher rate than others. Analyzing literature is easy and fun for them. They are very creative and innovative with words, and they even speak in a very poetic and melodic manner.

Going back to record keeping on behalf of others. Of course each and every clan does a good job of passing down traditions and knowledge to their own descendants. Sure, they can manage by themselves. You might think, why does Lukedonia even need a whole clan, whose job is keeping extra copies on everything for everyone, to work behind the scenes? Firstly, the Paradiso exists to preserve, because that’s what they’re meant to do. They cover everything they can possibly get their hands on, from beginning to end. This extends to all types of knowledge that had ever existed and ever will exist, so traditions and history of other noble clans simply get grouped in there. Secondly, this serves an extremely important purpose in the worst case scenario where a clan perishes completely and all their records somehow disappear alongside them. It could be due to an unfortunate event of a total massacre done by an outsider, or a deliberate, malicious attempt by a Clan Leader whose goal is to destroy and end both them self and their whole clan. Whatever it is, in the extremely unlikely chance where there is no one left in a specific clan to provide knowledge and other crucial information essential to restoration, complete records that still exist thanks to the Paradiso’s safekeeping can then be used to restore the clan and help them get back on their feet, and eventually return them to what they once were. In a way, this is like the Paradiso keeping the ultimate backup plan for everyone in case something terrible happens. This effectively prevents any clan from perishing completely, whether by external or internal threats, or both. Specifically internal, in case a Clan Leader goes insane and tries to sabotage their entire family.

This applies to the line of Lords as well. If for some reason one Lord fails them all, the Paradiso have complete records of all the Lords before them, which could be helpful as a reference, analyzing what were and weren’t successful, and where to make adjustments from then on. While this doesn’t guarantee whoever’s on the throne will actually listen, it’s better than nothing.

For the above reasons, the Paradiso are never expected to fight or provide aid in battle. In fact, they are urged to avoid ever getting caught up in one, and evacuate to a safe place if there is a threat. This is because if the Paradiso die out, it means that Lukedonia’s last resort has died out as well. The safekeepers of knowledge must hang on no matter what. In a way, the Paradiso symbolize hope. To guarantee their safety, somewhere along the line of Lords, one of Raskreia’s ancestors decreed that Paradiso Clan Leaders and their heirs must each be assigned a team of elite bodyguards made up of powerful nobles. Usually, the bodyguard teams consist of members from different clans, and each team has around twenty members. Their job is to protect Paradiso CLs and heirs from threats. The bodyguards keep an eye on the surrounding and put anyone in proximity under surveillance, help the Paradiso evacuate to safety in an emergency, and fight on their behalf in life-threatening situations, even if it means sacrificing themselves in the process. These bodyguards are ready to give up their lives at any moment for the Paradiso. All of them are volunteers, and while they may have different reasons for becoming a bodyguard, they are completely devoted to their job.

Regarding the Paradiso’s place in canon. During the invasion of Lukedonia, as soon as Lord Raskreia was aware of the presence of Lagus and the traitor nobles, she ordered Titus, his daughters, and their clan members to immediately evacuate to safety. That’s why they never made an appearance. They were being guided to safety by their teams of elite bodyguards. The Lord also ordered them to hide and not come back until the traitors are eliminated and all threats are cleared. Though, before the Paradiso finished evacuating, the traitors were taken care of, so they stopped evacuating and settled back to where they were before. No harm was done to them but it sure did give them a massive heart attack. Titus recalls heating up his tea and getting comfy on his couch and ready to read a new book and all that, and then suddenly everyone was panicking and his bodyguards literally picked him up and started running towards the secret passage that hadn’t been opened since eons ago. Not fun.

Now that’s the backstory on the “wisdom” part of the Paradiso, Clan of Miracles and Wisdom. What about “miracles”?

That is, aside from being the guardians of knowledge, the Paradiso are also wish-granters. Granting wishes, making the impossible possible, turning crisis into opportunity, performing miracles … those are just a few ways the humans describe what the Paradiso do. Or, what they think the Paradiso can do.

What they don’t know is that the truth is much more complicated. The thing is, there is no such thing as a miracle. Everything is always, always set in a balance, and the universe intends for it to stay that way. What the Paradiso do is simply changing up the order of things in which they are perceived to happen, and in the end, it all cancels out. The difference is while the humans don’t know about the truth behind this “wish granting”, the nobles do. The nobles understand that ultimately there is no gain, and that all they can possibly get from “wishing” upon the Paradiso is temporary relief and happiness in the present while greater misery and disappointment await in the future. For this reason, virtually no nobles ever ask for a “wish” from the Paradiso, because they know how it truly works. Ask for something that’s not meant to happen, pay the price later. It’s a fair trade. Think wisely before you ask for the impossible. The nobles merely use the word “miracle” as a way to address the Paradiso out of respect and admiration for their preservation work of Lukedonia, as well as appreciating them for being a symbol of hope.

But this is a different situation with humans, who very much believe that these weird, seemingly omnipotent red-eyed gods really could perform miracles. And these humans are always begging for more. Many previous Paradiso Clan Leaders couldn’t say no to these helpless humans, and they eventually gave in to the begging. There are a lot of examples throughout history. Human A wished to become super rich, the Paradiso granted it, human A got their desired pile gold and grand castle, only for things to “balance out” later where they lose all their gold, and their castle collapses to a precise meteorite strike while they’re gone, and they’re back to exactly where they started. Human B wished to cure a loved one’s terminal illness, the Paradiso granted it, Human B’s loved one became free of illness, but one year later, human B’s other loved one gets the same exact illness. Human C wished for their rival to get in an accident and lose a limb, the Paradiso granted it, human C’s rival’s left leg indeed got crushed in a carriage crash, but human C’s left leg gets ripped off by a predator several weeks later. The motivation behind the wishes didn’t matter. Whether it stemmed from the desire to do good or evil, whether it was out of selflessness or selfishness, etc. it all balances out in the end.

The Paradiso’s power simply changes the order of things happening, not the things themselves. It’s an odd ability, yes, but it exists. Objectively, this “miracle performing” power simply is. If you add one now, you subtract one later. It eventually goes back to zero no matter what. The nobles all understand this. However, this is where it gets tricky. The humans refuse to believe that their so-called “wishes” have consequences. They always, always believe that they are an exception, that luck will always be on their side, that their wishes are so great and meaningful they will, and must, bypass the laws of the universe. They always say they won’t regret it, and that they’d be willing to do anything it takes for a wish to come true. Apparently, that’s not true. When they eventually realize that wishes get balanced out and they have to bear with the consequences, every ounce of gratefulness they previously had will turn into hatred and vengeance. False gods, is what some humans started to call the Paradiso. Evil beings who intend to cause misery by granting the illusion of happiness and satisfaction, dumping them in hell after giving them a taste of heaven. And so on. The Paradiso never claimed to be gods, nor did they ever ask to treated as such. The humans just decided to do that on their own, until they didn’t want to anymore. Anyways, things got ugly real quick. At one point tens of thousands of humans gathered together to declare war on the “false god” nobles. Though, no real harm was done, as the nobles had mind control powers after all. They made the humans forget about all that had happened. After this situation was quickly resolved, the Paradiso Clan Leader at that time declared that from then on, their wish-granting power should never be used on humans again. They are only allowed to interact with humans to trade knowledge and books. Only books, no wishes. Fast forward to several generations later, Titus, the current Clan Leader, follows this philosophy. He would also teach this same philosophy to his daughters and warn them about the dangers of the unpredictable human mind. One century they would put up statues of you, declare themselves as your followers, pray to you every day, and even kill members of their own kind to offer as “tribute”, centering their entire lives around you. In the blink of an eye, they would destroy and burn those very same statues, and seek revenge on you. Unpredictable indeed. Luckily, thanks to mind control, the humans don’t remember the Paradiso as their loved and hated wish-granter gods anymore. Curiously, there are a few surviving records by ancient human scribes on certain pink-haired gods of miracles. In the present day, modern humans just study these works without being too serious about it. Titus thinks it’s mildly amusing.

Before I introduce their Soul Weapon, I’ll explain the mechanics of their wish-granting skill a bit more. It happens supernaturally as part of their weird noble powers. This power applies to mundane things as well. Say you got unpleasant bowel moments? Go to a Volo and ask for some herbs. It could take some time for the herbs to kick in, but you’d actually be cured, and your guts won’t upset you anymore. Go to a Paradiso and “wish” your inconvenience away? Well, the symptoms disappear within a millisecond and you’re seemingly cured, eeeeexcept a few days later those same exact bowel movements “return”, perhaps by chance at an even more inconvenient timing. Same intensity and duration and all that. And say you wanted to ace an exam but don’t have the time to study, or don’t want to study, and on average, you’d score a 70 out of 100. Go to the Paradiso and “wish” for a 100 on your next exam. You’d indeed score a 100, but for the exam after that, you’d get a 40.

And say you wanted to dry your laundry but don’t want to put it in the dryer? “Wish” for it and your basket of laundry over there would be dried magically. However, the next time you use the dryer, it would malfunction on the first cycle and you’d come back to discover that your clothes are still wet. Basically, you never save effort or time. You can’t possibly cheat around it. It’s just a matter of now, or later. For this reason, some nobles think this skill is hilarious and they often use it as a form of entertainment, in a game of truth or dare when one of them loses a bet. Just harmless, funny stuff. Titus the Clan Leader thinks it’s hilarious as well but of course as a role model he can’t openly say that in front of the others, lol. But he knows that they know, and they know that he knows that they know. In the end they aren’t humans and actually understand how wishes work so it’s just another day for them.

Soul Weapon: Liebe. A book. Emits a light pink aura. Its wielder can choose to hold it or have it levitate on its own. Its front and back covers are black, and have no text on them. Its book corners are golden, and its ribbon pink. Its pages are white and seem to be blank, though it’s actually covered in text which usually only its wielder can read. If anyone else tries to read it, they see nothing unless Liebe’s wielder gives the okays. No peeking, fellas, sorry. Somehow, the pages seem to never run out no matter how much writing goes in there. That’s because the “text” isn’t actually ink on paper, it’s a SW after all (duh) and it’s almost alive in a sense. The text can appear and disappear, and move around at its wielder’s will to display whatever its wielder wants to read. The pages can flip on their own and the bookmark moves as well. Strange, fascinating little SW it is.

Liebe’s wielder can use it to do a variety of things. Firstly, it can instantly display text from any other book at any given time, as long as that other book was transcribed/written by a fellow Paradiso clan member. From the very first book written by the very first Paradiso CL to the newest addition by a young Paradiso apprentice scholar? Yup, every single one of them. That’s what makes it so powerful, its innate connection to essentially their clan’s entire history of knowledge. This may sound a bit invasive considering how some clan members may not want their CL to read everything they write, so to be polite, the CLs always ask people before using Liebe to view their work. Most clan members are very happy and even honored to have their works read by their beloved CL. Yes, even those private gossip diaries, lmao. Liebe’s wielder can also write in it directly. And by writing I don’t mean actual ink on paper. It could be, but doesn’t have to be. CLs can speak their thoughts out loud, or even just think inside their mind with the idea of having Liebe record it, and boom it’s in the book. There are many ways to “write” in Liebe. Titus thinks it’s hilarious to watch the others look super confused when he tells them he’s writing but then they see that he isn’t “doing” anything and nothing seems to appear on the pages anyway. He just likes messing with them lol.

Secondly, Liebe can be used to grant wishes. Specifically, “greater” wishes that would be history-changing, legend-worthy miracles by humans standards (p.s. nobles don’t think of wishes as miracles because they understand how wishes work, they simply refer to them as “time transactions” in a very symbolic way. As for the less grandiose stuff, smaller wishes etc. can be granted without Liebe, by both CLs and heirs, and ordinary clan members). However, due to previously mentioned incidents with humans, the CLs no longer use this aspect of Liebe’s powers anymore. In the past, humans used to refer to Paradiso CLs as “the gods with books” for a good reason.

Thirdly, Liebe can be used to speak with the deceased. Specifically, nobles who have entered eternal sleep, if their souls are still out there somewhere. This is a great and terrifying power, of course, one that cannot be used casually or even revealed at all. That’s why no one else except for the Paradiso CLs themselves know about this skill because of the dangers it may bring, if the others find out. This is the only thing that the Paradiso omit from their library of knowledge. Titus’ predecessor only told him about this before they passed down Liebe to him, and Titus himself is keeping this a secret from his twin daughters until one of them becomes CL. Liebe lets its wielder speak with the deceased through its connection with the deceased’s souls. If Titus wanted to, he could speak with the predecessors of any clan, whose souls now reside in their descendants’ SW. Usually there is no reason to and ultimately it’s no good because the risks of getting lost and emotionally caught up in the past exist. But for those who died by forced eternal sleep for whatever reason, the Paradiso CL can connect with them and offer them solace and help them feel peace for once and all, if they should have any regrets and lingering feelings. Titus was the one who comforted and guided Seira and Regis’ predecessors after they were murdered, and the traitors CLs after their deaths as well, but since it’s a secret, he can’t tell anyone. Meanwhile the other content and fulfilled souls would rather be left alone so Titus doesn’t bother them, so this aspect of Liebe’s skill is almost never used. (For clarification this only applies to noble souls. Liebe can’t talk with dead humans/werewolves. Liebe also can’t talk with devoured souls like those who fell to Dark Spear e.g. Gradeus)

Lastly, Liebe’s wielder can use it to forcefully retrieve information out of any living being. Like literally going deep into someone’s mind, sucking out everything they know from the moment of their birth to the present. It can then display the retrieved knowledge on its pages and add it to its library as well. This spell can be cast without consent and is extremely invasive, and the recipient has a 30% chance of dying after the process because forcefully dissecting and pulling out contents of a person’s soul does irreversible damage. The Paradiso are generally nonviolent and against unnecessary deaths so they never use this skill because doing so is considered evil and taboo. As much as they love to learn, they aren’t desperate enough to do that, and they have their morals too. For a non-combat based clan, this is probably the closest to an “offensive” skill there is. Other than that, Liebe being called a SW is already weird enough considering how it isn’t even remotely close to a typical weapon. Titus jokes about this too. Well, he insists that him knowing your embarrassing cringy secrets IS a weapon so.

The Paradiso cover an impressive amount of territory in Lukedonia. They have countless libraries scattered throughout the land, big and small. These libraries are always supplied with plenty of paper and ink in case one of their clan members feel a sudden spark of inspiration and just want to get straight to writing. Titus and his daughters do have a manor which serves as their main residence, but they don’t actually live there much. They spend most of their time in the Paradiso library tower, Minerva, a wonder of more than 500 floors. There they have everything they need to live comfortably, so they don’t live in their actual home. As splendid and grand as Minerva is, it’s actually quite cozy so they think of it as their “true” home. Also stairs. A ton a stairs. You just keep getting stairs. More stairs after stairs. Titus claims it’s a good workout. The other clan members, maybe not so much lol. But it’s worth it! Minerva’s top floor is open to the sky and there blooms a single supernatural cherry blossom tree. Its trunk and branches are made of iridescent crystal and its glittering petals fall like snowflakes, disappearing just before they touch the ground. The Paradiso’s supernatural owls also reside on this floor. Sometimes they’d also visit the other floors to help scholars retrieve and shelve books.

And time for the character introductions!

Titus Paradiso: the current Clan Leader. A visibly older man with prominent wrinkles on his face and hands. Quite short and his daughters tower over him. Has a very cute and friendly-looking face, and is always smiling. Basically the sweet grandpa that everyone loves. Raises his bushy eyebrows when he spots something interesting, or as a greeting when he sees someone. Eyes are extremely expressive. His beautiful, curly pink hair looks like a combination of a cotton candy cloud and a cherry blossom tree in full bloom. His hair is actually so soft, if you run your fingers through it, it’d almost feel like touching a cloud. His twin daughters made his beard ribbon bow tie for him when they were children, a treasure which he cherishes very much and has worn ever since. Affectionately calls his girls “Sia” and “Bella”, and loves to pat them on their heads even though he’s kind of too short to do that anymore since they’re too tall for his hands to reach. He’s just so proud of them, hehe.

Titus is a jolly, lively, happy-go-luck man beloved by all for his pleasantness and knowledgeability. He is often referred to as “Professor Titus” by the people of Lukedonia. Titus is a humble man and he has never claimed to be a professor nor he does he think of himself as one, but since everyone loves him that way, he reluctantly accepts the title. He’s super flattered though. He still thinks he has a long way to go and much yet to learn before he deserves to be referred to as such, but the truth is he very much is the most eligible person in the entirety of Lukedonia to have the title of Professor. It’s just a way the other nobles show their appreciation for him. Not really having anything to do with this title but rather just a coincidence, he has his own lecture hall in the Paradiso library tower Minerva and teaches all kinds of subjects there. Ever since his days of youth, he’s been doing research, writing books, transcribing ancient texts, composing poems etc etc. right there in that space of his. After he took over as CL, he started teaching there as well.

Non-Paradiso noble guests are allowed to freely enter and leave Minerva as long as they don’t venture into the “clan members only” off-limit floors, so Titus always has a lot of guests. Some are diligent students who have come to listen to his lectures and take notes from him, some are just curious, some think this is a nice location to go on a date with their partner. A few regulars even come here just to nap. Titus doesn’t really care about what you’re here for as long as you don’t talk too loudly and keep the noise level to yourself. As for Titus’ lessons, he doesn’t really have a fixed schedule or curriculum or anything. Actually, nothing is planned. He could be quietly reading a book on a couch by himself or something, then boom he feels the motivation and he’d get up and teach a full-course lesson right away. Just like that. He never schedules these lectures, and they are quite spontaneous, so his devoted students are basically tower hermits who live there full time and wait for his random but phenomenal lessons. You can see why the others all call him Professor Titus, lol. He still insists he has a long way to go, though. Man doesn’t even know how amazing he truly is. His daughters insist that he should be proud of himself and boy, he’s SO happy to hear that from his beloved girls!

Titus is a very interesting person by himself. He smiles, giggles, and laughs a lot. Even something slightly funny can make him break into laughter and gleefully clap his little hands. Being older than a lot of the population means that he sees them as kids, and he loves kids, so of course he’s going to find the things they say and do to be cute. Kiddie shenanigans. Titus also moves around a lot, so he’s either fidgeting or playing with something in his hands. Could be his beard, a pen, chocolate bar wrapper, anything really. He was super delighted when Ludis’ daughter Susanna gifted him a toy once. “Rubik’s cube… is this what you call this little thing? Ho ho, thank you, kiddie! It’s amazing!!!! I love it!!! Eeeeeeeee!!!!!”, he exclaimed. He’s been playing with it ever since and stores it in his beard, weirding people out when they find out that’s where he keeps it. His excess energy is also obvious when he walks. In fact, he’s almost always skipping around on his feet like a little kid. He’s kind of clumsy though, so sometimes he’d trip and fall. Not helpful when your tower is literally full of stairs. He gets by just fine. Titus also hums to himself a lot, whether he’s organizing books in his tower, reading something, or walking around. Could be humming to the tune of a human detergent commercial, lol. If someone asked a Paradiso clan member where their CL is, they’d point to one of their bookshelves and Titus is right there, with a book in one hand and a back scratcher in another, happily humming and skipping around from aisle to aisle checking for incorrectly shelved books. Are you here for a lecture? Well great, because I’m about to give one in ten minutes!! See you at the lecture hall!! Truly a sweet, funny grandpa. If you manage to answer all his questions correctly, maybe he’ll give you a lollipop, lol.

Titus also has a few distinct hobbies. First of all, he’s an excellent winemaker in his spare time. He has his own vineyard and he gives names to every plant. Lady Violet, Curly, Sir Bubbleton, etc. He loves them dearly. He works closely with Leona Pyradros and Doris Ceresthalassa to cultivate delicious grapes of all sorts. The wine he makes is heavenly. In my headcanon all nobles are naturally immune to several types of poison and alcohol is one of them. They can’t get drunk even if they want to, so alcohol is more like flavored water to them. Nevertheless it still tastes absolutely amazing to them so it’s a drink loved by all. Titus has like dozens of wines. Each of them has a distinct flavor and he’d host parties with them. Out of all his types of wines, his two most prized ones are named after his beloved girls, whom he loves more than anyone else in the world. His wines are so famous that even werewolf Lord Maduke is rumored to be a huge fan and imports them regularly (in my headcanon Maduke hates nobles but he loves their alcohol. He knows what the fine stuff is. He doesn’t want to admit that he has an entire cellar full of that stuff lol). In general, if Lukedonia needs human money for some reason, wine exports is a way to do that. Titus’ other hobby is ink making. Your typical black ink, blue ink, green ink, pink ink, glittery ink, metallic ink, ink that changes color with temperature, ink that is invisible until you shine a specific light on it, etc. anything really. He loves to craft ink and even his intricate little ink bottles are tailor made. He totally has “Zephyrus Volo slipped and landed on a cactus and his kids had to pluck the thorns from his bum” written in his super fancy glittery pink ink, in super fancy and elegant Lukedonian cursive, in his gossip journal. Hey, something that funny deserves to be remembered with style and pizazz, so. No one can stop him, lol.

P.s. in present day Millennium AU Titus travels to the outside world a lot. His clan no longer granting wishes for humans doesn’t mean that he has to avoid them altogether. He can’t fight so his team of 20+ elite noble bodyguards always accompany him on his trips. And carry his things for him. And help him make maps of the best donut and milkshake shops. His job is still the same, buying books from humans/werewolves and occasionally trading them. He’s very up to date with the latest, trendiest things, so he even has a whole book on modern memes. After he gets home he’ll get one of his clan members to transcribe all that so he can look at funny memes on his book SW Liebe, lol. Trendy grandpa. You’d never expect Titus to flip around his SW and show you a meme. What an honor!

Before I introduce the Paradiso twins, I want to talk about them together first. Anastasia and Anabella were born after the combined soul fragments of Titus and their other parent split into two. This is a “complete” split, and it isn’t too uncommon. That’s how identical twins are born. In a “complete” split, the resulting now-separate soul fragments are stable and whole on their own. Nothing to worry about, no need to do anything. Just congrats, you thought you were having one kid, now you’re getting twins. In this case, each parent donated only one soul fragment, aka two total, but they got two kids instead of one. Usually, two kids require four total soul fragments, three kids require six total, etc. (P.s. Garyth and Alethea are technically twins. However, their split was incomplete and unstable, and Alethea was going to die, as she was the tiny, tiny piece that broke off from Garyth. This had never happened before in all of recorded history. In this emergency Regis had to offer an another soul fragment to Alethea’s which shortened his lifespan even more, but it saved her in the process. Garyth’s birth was normal but Alethea’s birth was delayed as the stabilizing took a long while so she is technically her elder brother’s much younger twin. I’ll elaborate on this in the future. Anyways)

The Paradiso twins are eerily similar. No one except their parents and Seira could tell them apart before they changed their hair and clothes to be more distinct. They move and speak in the same way, complete each other’s sentences flawlessly, everything like that. If they speak at the same time you’d just hear echos of the same thing, so whenever they’re seen together, one of them does the talking for the two of them. These twins even have a secret language consisting of tongue clicks, finger snaps, and eyelid movements that no one else understands except for themselves. They developed this language when they were toddlers and they still communicate like this when they don’t want others to know what they’re saying. Fun stuff. Sometimes they’re even unaware that they’re speaking in this secret language, and have to consciously switch to a normal spoken language, or when someone kindly reminds them. Whoops, didn’t mean to be rude there. Excuse us.

Regarding the twins’ other parent. It’s a secret for now, hehe. All I will say is that their other parent is one of Titus’ bodyguards. Probably not a surprise either. This character I have yet to reveal, so stay tuned lol.

For now, no one knows who will become Paradiso CL after Titus. Both of Titus’ heirs are competent and eligible for the position. It just depends on which one of them is more interested. For now, they aren’t too concerned with it. They don’t really care. Whoever doesn’t become CL will definitely have the privilege of more free time, so. Either way, time will tell.

Anastasia F. Paradiso: Titus’ eldest daughter, the older twin, and one of his heirs. Anastasia is the more pragmatic of the twins. She prefers to deal with things in the most efficient and logical way. She is also her father’s assistant and is seen by his side more othen than her younger sister. She manages the communication part of the work when it comes to other clans and nobles, representing her father when he is busy with something else. For this reason, people assume that she will become Paradiso CL after him and inherit Liebe. Though, that is just speculation and Anastasia dislikes how people give her little sister Anabella less credit than she deserves. Anastasia is basically only a millisecond older than Anabella yet she treats her like a baby lol. Anastasia is very serious about taking care of Anabella and watches over her even after they’ve grown up. She’d brush her little sister’s hair, ask if she’d forgotten anything, etc. the big sister stuff. When these two hold hands, Anastasia is always the one holding Anabella’s hand. Anastasia’s hobby is making books from scratch. She sources her own leather, paper, threads, etc. and it is a tedious craft, but she enjoys the process very much. It’s like meditating to her, just like how her father enjoys making ink. Her other hobby is poetry composition. She does have a mischievous side where she’d talk in rhyme and only rhyme in a conversation with another person just to annoy them. She thinks it’s hilarious. Apparently she inherited Titus’ mischievous side, lol. Anastasia eventually settles down with Seira in the far future in my Millennium AU.

Anabella F. Paradiso: Titus’ youngest daughter, the younger twin, and one of his heirs. Anabella is the more idealistic of the twins. She isn’t a typical dreamer but she is more open to ideas that her older sister Anastasia wouldn’t consider. Anabella likes to think outside the box and sometimes, that works better. She’s also more flexible when it comes to new approaches to old ways. Because of their differences, the sisters are perfect for working with each other. While big sister Anastasia does more work centered around communication in public with their father, Anabella prefers to work behind the scenes. She manages the storage room, updates catalogues, imports books, etc. stuff that seem less significant on the surface but are equally important in making sure the clan runs smoothly. Anabella does get a bit embarrassed when big sister Anastasia treats her like she’s so much younger, but she appreciates the sentiment and it feels nice to be taken care of. Anabella’s hobby is also winemaking, just like her father, except she uses some unconventional ingredients: body parts of supernatural creatures. Dragon’s scales, griffin’s talons, pegasi feathers, anything with magical properties she can get her hands on. Of course she obtains them with consent. Hey Mr. Scissors, it’s molting season soon, right? Can I have your shell once you’re done? Etc. The alcohol she makes is… impressive but it is an acquired taste so might take some getting used to. Her other hobby is writing science fiction. She publishes her own novels in the human world under a pseudonym and every single release is a big hit. They’re about to get movie adaptations too, so she’s excited about that. Anabella eventually settles down with one of her bodyguards, just like her father.

And that’s it for now! Check out my other original clans here!

#noblesse #manhwa #myart #oc #original character #original clan leaders #titus paradiso #anastasia f. paradiso #anabella f. paradiso

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sleepycoffins-and-benhargreeves · 7 months ago

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PART 1 REPLY

Baby so sorry for the late reply lmao really had to think this through

Alrighty, so if we're going to have Bive first before it turns into Kliven, we gotta decide if it's with Umbrella!Ben or with Sparrow!Ben. Umbrella!Ben would be a bit tricky since Five went missing at 13 and Ben died at 16. But, let's say they fell in love in their tweens. I see them bonding over literature, Ben with his love for Russian literature as a headcanon to the books he reads as a ghost and Five just being interested in all literature as reference to his conversation with Reginald on S2 about them studying every literature out there. Although you can argue that Five just remembers all of these because ya know, he's Five, sharp af memory, you can also headcanon that because he was stuck in the apocalypse, his companions are Dolores and books.

But moving back to their tweens, I see the two of them hanging out due to their love of reading and being nerds about literature. This is where Klaus would step away from time to time, since he sees this as something boring so he wouldn't hang out with Ben here as much. Going to borrow a little from Sparrow!Ben that Ben in general likes to draw. I do feel like the two of them appreciate art, which is something they can also bond with Viktor from time to time, but Viktor is more a music type.

I see them playfully reciting lines from Shakespeare, analyzing together the thought process of the characters and why they did what they did. For some odd reason, I can see Five falling for Ben first. I think Five is still more of a scientific person, he likes logical things so he started to like Ben who is more of an emotional person, like yes they analyze book characters and argue about why this and that happen, but he can see the way Ben empathizes with these characters and he feels drawn to the way Ben talks about their darkness. Maybe sometimes even referencing his own darkness about the horror. Ben on the other hand, would fall for the little subtleties of Five. Borrowing from S1 of Five with Dolores, although you can argue that he's become dependent on Dolores hence why he is very attentive towards her, I think Five's love language truly is acts of service, so whether Five is aware of it or not, he is always more attentive of Ben than he is with their siblings.

I think he would even observe Klaus at this moment, because Klaus is the best friend so he would know far more about Ben that Five is privy to. I think in any universe, Klaus and Ben would be best friends first, so I would imagine Five seeing Klaus as a rival in their early days. Since they are in tweens, I think they won't have a relationship but they almost had one. Before Five went missing, I think they would have had a mutual understanding. Like, they both know they like each other but they won't do anything about it because 1. They do not yet know how this will work and 2. They are unsure on how to move forward so they are at a stand-still up to the moment Five went missing

Moving forward, Bive/Fiven def cannot occur during S1 to S2 as Klaus is possessive of Ghost!Ben. I'm trying to think of a moment of Klaus being "generous" of sharing Ben, but from what I see from his personality he could share Ben but the moment anyone gets too close to him he'll take it back and tell people that he can't fully control his powers yet. So, this era would be a no go.

Now, with Sparrow!Ben this will be an interesting scenario. I think this will be a little angsty with some serious insecurities on Sparrow!Ben. But honestly, no matter what happens Sparrow!Ben will always be insecure and feel like he'll be in Umbrella!Ben's shadow until we do get a merging/regaining of past memories.

Focusing on Sparrow!Ben only, I see this as Five being the first one to approach him. Out of all the siblings, Ben was the one he could never truly save. He wasn't able to blink into the year and date that Ben died, only to the apocalypse where he could only save five siblings. I think he would approach Ben but with caution and Ben would immediately pick up on it. Ben would be able to rationalize as well that Five is approaching out of guilt, not because Ben is that emotionally/empathetically smart (which he is) but because he's trained himself to find weaknesses from people so it's not out of empathy on his part but more of "What can I use against these people?" type of approach.

Oh, I am excited and gleeful about this part all of a sudden, I didn't realize Ben would be THIS toxic here and I am loving it. I think there is a POSSIBILITY of Five's guilt being manipulated here, heck, he may have even noticed and let Ben manipulate him. But only to an extent. The thing I like most about these two is that they will compete against each other, they will butt heads and one up the other and that will be where their feelings start to develop. Ben will like the challenge and Five is one of the few people who was somewhat part of his timeline so he'll hold onto that for comfort. Five on his part, will def be reminded of his own Umbrella!Ben and understand what Klaus meant that there's still something of the old Ben inside Sparrow!Ben. He of course, would not mention that part since he can easily tell how angry Ben becomes from the comparisons.

With the amount of challenging and one-upping from each other, they'll eventually find comfort in one another. Aside from Klaus, Five will definitely be the only other person who could stand Sparrow!Ben's bitchiness. However, he would also be able to separate Sparrow!Ben from Umbrella!Ben which Sparrow!Ben would def appreciate a lot. He'd def mention less on their similarities which the other siblings would point out when they notice similarities between Umbrella!Ben and Sparrow!Ben.

Another thing that they will be able to bond about is not being able to save their siblings. This Ben will be wracked with guilt in not being able to save his Sparrow siblings. As much as it shows in S3 that Sparrow!Ben is a manipulative jerk that doesn't care about anyone, I do feel as though that that is a front he has to put up so that he can become Number One. I think he does truly care about his siblings, we can also see a glimpse of that when Ben wanted Harlan's head when they were defeated. Although yes, it was a strategic move to lessen the Umbrella's powers since Harlan is obviously on their side. But, their main goal had changed into merging the two families together, so having Harlan's head on a plate wasn't the best of moves, especially when they needed as many super-powered people as they can to help contain the kugelblitz.

So, this will definitely be an even deeper bonding between Ben and Five. Oh my god, comfort sex will be their first sex fuckkkkkkkkk

I feel like I should write a fanfic about their comfort sex, this idea came while I was writing this and I am loving it way too much sdfhnojashfkl

I can definitely see Sparrow!Ben being a bit reluctant about sex first, like the two of them definitely know they like each other but it would be more on the fact that Five physically still looks like a teenager. Which Ben will definitely hold against Five as many times as possible lmao and Five will point out that he's being a lying asshole because Five can clearly see the attraction Ben feels.

I think Sparrow!Ben will let this one dialogue slide when Five says "I had the old Ben before, I know we liked each other but we were too young to do anything about it. I won't let me having a young body get in the way of what I want right now." I think this will be one of the few moments that Five will compare the two, but it's more of a missed opportunity rather than comparing the two of them.

By the time they have an understanding and are definitely fucking frequently, this is where Klaus will come in. If we're going to have Klaus be the last one to enter into this relationship, we still gotta accept that Klaus was in love with Ben all these years BUT he was unaware of it.

Let's borrow his words from S2 where he said "Technically" they were still siblings, so romantic relationships between them would still be incest. Maybe somewhere out there Klaus still had a bit of a moral compass (weird topic to have a moral compass on for Klaus, but let's say this is it. It can also explain how he jokes a lot about his siblings being hot because he doesn't want to admit that he would fuck his brother, Ben specifically). Additionally, we will have to remove the scenario where Sparrow!Ben and Klaus had sex at the end of the world wedding. If we're making Klaus oblivious to his feelings, they only hanged out and much to Ben's dismay about being disappointed of not having sex before the apocalypse. Due to this incident, Ben will write off Klaus as a romantic/sex partner. Klaus definitely would not have noticed he was actually in love with brother until he saw Ben and Five actually start to have a budding romantic relationship. The thing is, I think Klaus would be confused as well because he also likes Five. He's a lot more softer to Five once he sees the way he interacts with Ben, but he is also seething with green envy.

Five definitely likes Klaus, he's someone he likes to hang out with and doesn't take Five's physical age against him. So, the moment Klaus starts becoming possessive of Ben and Five realizes much sooner than Klaus that Klaus likes Ben romantically would he realize that they're in a predicament.

I told my friend about my Kliven brainrot and she asked me how I'd make this work if it was for Ben and Five to fall for each other before Klaus falls with either of them and now I don't know what I'd do?

Can you lend me your thoughts, @sleepycoffins-and-benhargreeves , sweetheart? lol

#Kliven #Kliven meta

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whumpzone · 3 years ago

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It’s mango season in south India so I propose this— Linden buys mangoes for himself and Col :)

(On a side note I don’t often see desi characters outside of the “smart Indian engineer/IT/doctor” trope in literature and movies outside of India and I’ve fully never seen desi characters in whump so I’m currently highkey obsessing over Linden and Vik because of that and just!!! thank you thank you thank you for writing brown characters that don’t fall into the trope of being side characters who are engineers or IT specialists or doctors and have actual personalities, and are diverse, and queer, and who I can see my cousin brother in (specifically referring to Vik here lmao) but yeah so just. Thanks :) )

also if you don’t have a mango anon I’m mango anon now

-🥭

oh this ask made me sooooo happy thank you for sending it in!!

I love mangos so much. mango season...... such a dream. linden needs to have his own mango season within the walls of his house 🥰🥰🥰

and im so happy to hear that you like my two desi boys. you're right that the indian character stereotypes are EVERYWHERE and its so limiting

linden and vik are just themselves <3 vik in particular is really thwarting those smart indian stereotypes LOL. he's a dummy

#thanks mango anon!!#🥭 anon #asks

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jewelsunrays · 2 years ago

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So, college. Ugh.

One thing I still haven’t adjusted to yet after 7 weeks (!!!) is the sleeping schedule. I have been absolutely so exhausted, trying my damndest to go to bed around 10:30 and wake up at 6am to catch the train. But its so hard to fall asleep.

Train rides in the morning are cold, busy, a beautiful view and a great excuse to read or listen to music. My only qualm is related to my sleeping schedule: I always end up drifting off. Its even worse on the train ride home. I love train rides in the morning but in the afternoon I resent them - at that point the sun is beating down and I’m sweating despite it being autumn and four degrees in a morning and its harder to find a seat and I have more to carry and my feet hurt, and on top of all that I’d be falling asleep on the way home! But ultimately I like catching the train. The thought occurred to me that when I was younger, going on the train was a special treat, symbolic of days out somewhere new or visiting family, an exciting rarity; now, its my daily routine, nothing out of the ordinary.

School itself is… well, its school. I was pretty excited to go back because I missed having a schedule and I liked doing work, funnily enough, I’m not having the same thoughts now. I forgot that in sixth form there’s this huge pressure of a-levels and worrying about leaving and heading to a university or a life of work, and the obligation to study in your own time for like 30 hours a week. 30 hours! Inhumane. On top of getting 8 hours of sleep, how the fuck are we meant to balance our own life? I’ve made a study schedule, but its extremely loose as funnily enough scheduling in the time you’re meant to have fun takes away the fun because there’s this pressure to have fun - you get it.

English Literature is my favourite class. My teacher is Alan (we refer to teachers by their first names, a huge adjustment, I still end up saying ‘sir’ or ‘miss’ lmao) and he’s probably my favourite. Even though he’s mocked a bit and has the sense of humour of a 50 year old man, which he is, I somehow still find him entertaining. Its like everything he does is funny, he’s not even trying to. I missed being able to read and analyse texts. I’ve also found myself putting up my hand far more than I did at GCSE, even finding myself shouting out the answers sometimes, communicating a lot more in group work - a fucking magnum task but I’m doing good nonetheless. Guess there’s been quite a shift in confidence.

Sociology is okay. We have to take so many goddamn notes, whereas in English its mostly annotating the books or filling out worksheets and only writing down the essentials - in Sociology we have to write down basically the entire powerpoint, and in my free time I have to sort through it and rewrite it so my hideous scribbles become somewhat discernible, and on top of that the tests for it are so goddamn hard considering he barely goes into depth! Ironic, considering my sociology teacher is a fucking waffler. He’ll stay on a powerpoint slide for 15 minutes waffling about one sentence of it which ultimately is just rewording the sentence in a more complicated manner, meaning we can’t finish the whole topic he wants to cover in his one lesson, which means we continue it the next lesson which cuts down the next topic we’re doing, meaning right now we’re far fucking behind and I have a essay test next week which I’m pooing myself about because I hardly know half the content. Yikes. I basically use his lessons for napping time.

I despise Art. I signed up for art under the illusion that I would actually get to draw and paint and make things. Instead, we have to cover other topics like Graphics, Photography, Textiles - I just wanna draw, and we’ve only done one lesson of that in the 18 lessons I’ve had. I despise photography, how are we meant to go into depth and write a paragraph about a random photo she made us take of a bottle? Painful shit. Our art teacher missed about two weeks of lessons, meaning we mostly had to spend those two weeks going over past things we’ve done and catching up. But then when she returned, last Tuesday, she set the deadline for our entire sketchbook to be complete and up to standard for the end of the week with extra double page on top of that - 1pm Friday. You’d think there wouldn’t be that much work if she gave us such little time, but trust me when I say the entire class was staying behind in college rushing to finish up everything and complete new work. Ugh.

I was actually intending to switch out of Art to English Language, but due to her absence I couldn’t get my teachers signature on the form so I have to stick with art. I consulted my form teacher last Friday in our one-on-one session (a required thing, but embarrassingly enough when I touched upon mental health support and she mentioned family deaths I teared up, so fucking humiliating) and she said she’d see what she could do, so who knows? I’ll update if I end up transferring.

I’m not sure if I’ve touched upon Enrichment, but every Wednesday after lunch there are no lessons so that all students can do an extracurricular. I chose Exploring Leeds, where every week we go to a different museum or historical place in Leeds and have a look around. My first few weeks, there was a bit of a hiccup - I missed the first session due to a hospital appointment, meaning I missed the second session because I had no information for where to go. However the teacher who runs the Exploring Leeds club is Alan my english teacher! So it was sorted out in no time. Its quite a fun club, except he walks so goddamn fast the club can’t keep up. When we get to the museum we can wander around and do our own thing for a while which is more fun the bigger the museum is. Pretty sure everyone else signed up for an excuse to bunk out of school and leave early considering the museums we’ve gone to, I’ve been the only one looking around at the exhibits. No judgement there.

Lunchtimes are mostly spent eating in a stall in the bathroom. There are so many places to hang out but I’d rather gauge out my own eyes than eat in front of other people so I choose the bathroom so I can lean on the windowsill and nap and be alone, plus it makes me feel like a protagonist from a teen movie. It also saves me from being alone around groups of friends and remembering how utterly alone I am. I also go to the local park and read under a tree for a few hours between lessons when I don’t feel like going to the ILZ (Independent Learning Zone) and studying. Makes me feel really intellectual and academic, a true Rory Gilmore.

Part of why I returned to college was so I could feel like I wasn’t letting down my family, to prove I wasn’t stupid by dropping out of school, to go back and get good grades and confirm everything that’s been said about me was right. Unhealthy, but true. I really expected people to ask about my lessons and give me a chance to prove I’m smart, but all thats been asked is, ‘have you made any friends?’ And fuck if that isn’t a sore point. Over the years I’ve been told and shown my brain and my grades make up for being awkward socially, that it didn’t matter because school was a priority. Thats what I told myself! That it was fine to not have any friends, that it shouldn’t and doesn’t bother me. But I’ve made no friends. Sure I’ve held conversations with people and we joke in class or discuss work easily, and I’m not as awkward or shy as I used to be, but outside of that? I’m completely fucking alone. It feels so humiliating to have to answer ‘yes, I’ve made friends’ when really I’m thinking ‘does it matter if I’ve made friends? I’m fulfilling everything you’ve asked me to do, I’m going to school, I’m being who you want, you’ve never cared if I’ve had friends before, why has your priorities changed? What’s wrong with you? What’s wrong with me?’. I just get so angry, because why does it matter? When in reality, I know it doesn’t matter that much. It only hurts me because I know the answer is no, and probably will be for a long time.

My mental health has taken quite the hit. My mum intends to call the doctors and get me some tablets for depression or anxiety or something, like she and my older brother have, because I’ve been doing horrendously in that area. I’ve tried my best to avoid all my problems, and talking about them, and god I really do avoid them, but I’ve still been crying and having breakdowns to the extent where I had to take a day off last week. And two teachers have recommended going to school’s provided therapy, which is nerve-wracking because I don’t think I could possibly utter a single thing out loud without bawling, which, again, is embarrassing. Ugh.

Besides all that, its whatever. Its fine. Its life! Gotta live it. I won’t even go into the cost of living crisis, the money problems, the fact I’ve had to be the one to pay rent and buy food and the pressure I feel. Christmas is coming up and it should all be better soon. I love Christmas. Lets focus on the positives.

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insufferablelust · 4 years ago

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Little Butterfly I (Sugar Daddy Mob Boss!Spencer Reid x Reader AU)

Warnings: Part 1 of an ongoing series (that i hopefully won’t abandon), Upcoming heavy violence, Mafia and Crime related fic, Spencer is a soft dom but is dangerous, HEAVY SMUT, upcoming dark kinks (Gun,Knife,Bondage etc), daddy kink for sure, Manipulation kink, Degradation, Humiliation (yknow the drill with me) spoiling kink?, upcoming murders etc, heavy topic regarding mental illness, College legal age!Reader, Age gap, older!Spencer, Mean!Spencer, BDSM themed, Indication of Subspace, Just heavily dark smutty series (yet again lmao)

Hello, my wonderful readers, i want to thank you all for the patience you all have for this series, hopefully i can stick to schedule an update this once a week like Thrilled. This will be a new territory for me since all i know about mafia and such are from the movies and countless books my father has inherited me with, so i deeply apologize if there’re some mistakes, this is an AU that means its only a story and fantasy. If you are uncomfortable to violence and sex then PLEASE DO NOT READ THIS. Thank you, and Happy Reading.

This series will set around the 80′s New York.

MASTERLIST HERE

There is no hiding from the absolute luxury you indulge in, in fact you love showing it to whoever might want to pry deep enough into your life. You caused no harm by it, and it certainly isn’t anybody’s business but yours and his.

The pair of arms around your waist is a certain remainder of who you belong to, and you loved it. He looked good tonight, almost too good with the suit adorning his perfection like an absolute genius adonis— your genius adonis. You feel your cheeks heats up slightly as he glanced at you, knowing just how shy you get around so many people— his little girl is sensitive after all.

Spencer Reid knows every little thing about you, what makes you tick, what makes you snap, what makes you bow in submission to him, and what makes you feel heavenly. He knows it all, he knows the way you trembled slightly whenever he wrapped his arms around your neck as he leaned down to kiss you, or how squirmy you get whenever he tug your hair, said your name calmly whilst shoving his fingers into your mouth— he knows everything.

—

It was a mutual agreement at first, living on 80’s New York has never been so stressful during your 20’s, all the student loans, the bartending you do sometimes, even the couple of scandalous photoshoots you sacrificed yourself doing to keep your bank account afloat. Your family never really cared much, and the only person that you truly have is Emily, your roommate.The whole ordeal was strange when you found out Emily’s ties to the mafia, being the daughter of one of the strongest mafia’s capo on America during that time. You wondered how on earth she has managed to doesn’t want to get on her father’s good side, and just except the riches that comes along with being a mob, but then again you were a stranger to it too...or so you thought.

The night she asked you to accompany her to meet her father and his boss, you shrugged and said yes, having nothing to do in the apartment other than wallowing in your own debts and sadness— you immediately agrees which put a smile on her cute face.

“I thought you didn’t want nothing to do with your father.” You asked as you raked through the closet to find something... ‘elegant’ but not too much, it’s going to be in a lavish restaurant after all. Your eyes darted to Emily’s who has been staring at her phone, smiling to whoever is texting her— you could only assumed it was one of her secret girlfriend-hookup for the week.

“Well i didn’t but money is tight, fucking inflation.” She looked up for once, lips hanging open at the sight of you standing there in a black dress, short with a slit on the thigh area— looking absolutely ravenous. “Holy fucking shit.” Emily whispered.

“What? is this enough? god i feel like such a prude.” You bit your lip as you await her comments, “You look fucking gorgeous you idiot, i mean are you sure you aren’t gay by any chance?” She laughed, which caused you to giggle, “I never said i’m not gay.. just that i’m not—

“Interested in dating, yeah yeah but we can at least fuck or something.” She jokingly raised her eyebrows as you throw your bra her way and laughed, “I just don’t want to get distracted em, especially that we live together.” You pouted before giving her a kiss on the cheek, which made her roll her eyes and smile.

Only if you knew what this meeting will entails.

—

The wine tasted exquisite on your tongue, the sweet burn of merlot was pleasant on the base of your throat which shocked you at first— maybe you should stop buying cheap wines, because the real ones are heavenly. You looked around nervously, it has been a long time since you’ve gone out to have dinner, let alone one as expensive as this.

“Stop looking like you’re about to die.” Emily whispers as she took the seat next to you, which you humorously giggle and swat her shoulder, “I’m not. It’s just.. new to me is all.” You nervously chuckled, before sipping on your wine some more. It was clear that her dad and his so called mob boss were late— which you rolled your eyes since Emily was basically rushing your make up, you just hoped that you looked decent enough, not that you want to impress anyone, its just good to feel like you’ve fit yourself to the occasion.

“Oh, you’ll get used to it.” Emily chuckled, before you could even process what she meant by that the sound of a soft elderly timbre rang through your ears, “Cara mia! Jesus, you’ve grown!” Emily slapped your thigh softly, gesturing for you to stand up.

Dear heaven, lord save your knees from buckling.

You watched as Emily greeted her father as you stood by her side, she kisses him on both cheeks as they made a small conversation that you pay no mind to since you were distracted, distracted by the pair of eyes that caught yours from the moment he walked in.

A soft yet stern eyes that held yours captive at this very moment, a presence that demands every single person for its attention, and intimidating like no other. A man, a finely sculpted man, standing in front of you in an attire that you were sure was more expensive than your whole closet, His soft looking curls marvelously falls fo his side, his plump lips were begging to be kissed— to be listened, to be heard, his tall lean figure towers over you which has you gulping down nervously— so much so that you failed to acknowledged the presence of Emily’s father calling your name.

“Y/N!” You let out a gasp before turning to shake Emily’s father’s hand, trying your best to smile as you glanced over the towering man, “So this is the Y/N i’ve heard so much about huh?” The old man snickered, looking gentle whilst maintaining a facade still. You giggled softly, “I hope there are all good things, nice to meet you Mr.Prentiss.”

“Oh please, Robert is fine. Oh Emily, Y/N this is don Reid.” He stepped back in.. what looks like an utter fear, you gasped as you realized that this is.. the mob boss Emily talked about, the masochistically handsome man you’ve been staring at— you thought a mafia boss would be someone older, but this is certainly not the case.

“Pleased to meet you both, Spencer Reid.” He extended his hand which Emily gladly took before she nudges your side whilst you were still gawking at the man, the soft yet deep timbre of his voice soothes and intimidate you at the same time, not to mention how he carries himself— practically saying he’s a god.

“Oh— um yes hello, pleased to meet you, i’m Y/N.” You bit your lip as you feel your cheeks hurt from the embarrassment, shaking his hand quickly— before you could even imagine pulling away, he gives you an amused chuckle and squeeze your hand tightly before releasing you.

“Well, let’s take a seat shall we?”

You are so fucking fucked.

“So, Y/N, Emily told me you’re majoring in art department, how’re you liking it?” Robert spoke as you eat your pasta slowly, trying not to show how you were trembling under the very same gaze that held you captive from the moment it arrives here. You gulped down a delicious bite of pancetta, before answering, “Oh i love it, always been my passion— well painting is, but i do love everything about art and literature.” You chuckled.

“I would love to see your art sometimes.” The voice could strangle you and you’d die happily, it really could— you glanced at the man whose been looking at you like a wolf to its prey, fingers skimming over the feet of the wine glass as a soft yet eloquent smile strikes over his face.

“Oh um, it’s not— it’s not that good, i wouldn’t want to waste your time.” You choked on your wine, feeling the burn on your throat as he let out a humorous-less laugh, shaking his head, before bringing his lean fingers to his lips. “Nothing is wasteful, not if it comes to such art like you.”

What?

“Huh?” You felt small, your cheeks heated at the reference as you tried so hard not to squirm and praised yourself by hearing what you thought you heard. Your eyes darted to his in a shy manner as he kept his composure well, licking the rim of his glass before sipping his wine gently.

“Anyways! dad, shall we talk a bit more private? i’m sure Y/N can keep the don company.” You gasped at Emily’s words, still barely grasping the previous encounter— the bottom of your heel jab at her left foot, as you glared at her, “Of course of course, don?” Robert spoke up, eyes lowering as his body turned to look at the smirking masterpiece that still stares at you with the same intensity.

“Go. We’ll be fine, won’t we angel?” You gulped down as much wine as you could without burning your throat before smiling nervously, eyes glancing back and forth to The Don and Emily.

“Y-Yes um sure.” You offered a gentle smile, even though your heels jabbed Emily’s which yet again resulted in her tiny laugh before she walks away to the back area of the restaurant.

The area was thick with intensity and glamorous lights, adding to the headache that already starts due to you being a lightweight around alcohol. Suddenly you realized, that you’re practically alone— with the don of the biggest mafia ring in America. “Go ahead and ask me the question.” He murmured sternly, causing your ears to perk at the sudden thrill that made your goosebumps rose and thrived under the shimmering lights.

“Pardon?” Your fingers fiddled with the hem of your dress as you tried so hard not to stare at the huge man, feeling as if you’re being cornered by a lion, and you his prey.

“Your cheeks are warm aren’t they? you keep biting your lips every time i muttered a word, you can’t even look at me because you know that the second you do, you wouldn’t be able to stop. Emily is right, you’re a pure little thing, its fucking cute really. If this table weren’t here separating us, you’d be across my lap already— for wearing something so slutty like that.” By the time he finishes taunting you, you stopped breathing, thigh squeezing against each other so tightly that you could feel how damp your panties are getting.

“Go ahead and ask, doll. Surely you can’t be dumb enough to think i would just allow anyone to meet me let alone a little college student like you.” His eyebrow lifted, as you nervous squirmed on your seat and breathed out.

“Why did you asked her to bring me?”

“Nicely. You know better, Y/N.”

“Sir...”

—

And the rest was history, the pair of arms around your waist tighten as the owner’s lips caress and nip at the very sensitive part of your neck, causing you to shudder and mewls. “mmh.. t-too early.” You complained, fully knowing that would only amuse him even more.

He chuckled as you had predicted, nimble fingers grazing up and down your front like feathers, delicately worshipping every inch of your skin. The blaring sound of New York’s traffic was prominent, but somehow that adds a thrilling aspect for you, months ago— you were picking up morning shifts by now, working your ass off just to gain enough cash to pay this month’s rent. But now, here you are, in the arms of the most feared yet young powerful don in the entirety of the mob community, Heck if everyone knows who he is and how much power he holds— they’d all fear him, but not you, not his fiery little butterfly.

“Shh, let me love on you a little.” Your heart warmed, familiar feeling of a thousand butterflies swarming on your belly caused your cheeks to warmed at the gesture. He said things like those often, though he made it perfectly clear that you were, you are only here for business arrangements, you knew he likes to toy over affection like this— one you aren’t supposed to get attached to. But how couldn’t you? when his hand so softly glides down the curve of your godly features, warm breath fanning across your skin from behind, whispering sweet words.

“Look so pretty for me, butterfly.” He whispered, causing you to yet again whimpers, hand clutching the sheets tightly as he moves down down down until he turned you over and settle between your legs, smiling at you. “If heaven is real, you’re definitely it.” He nipped and bit the exposed skin of your thighs, last night and the night before and before still there but like he said,

“If you agree to the terms, i’ll give you every damn thing you fucking want. Your bills, rents, loans, plus each and every single thing you wished to buy.”

“And in retur—“

“In return, you will be mine, mine to have whenever wherever i want, you won’t be my chained slave or nothing, but you’ll be mine.”

So marked you again and again he did, tearing your satin panties he did, panties that cost more than a week worth of luxury meal that he only grunted with “I’ll buy the whole fucking store, now shut up and let daddy eat his breakfast.”

You swore you’re in god’s heaven then and there, even if you aren’t sure that you believe in one, you can’t help but to think that this is some kind of miracle, your life is, here you have a perfect adonis, suckling on your clit as his fingers pump your delectable cunt in and out with such a fast pace that made you feel all floaty and flustered. The same man that commands the room whenever he walks in, the same man who pay all your bills, the same man who bought you a new lavish apartment and hands you gifts every damn day.

“Oh! oh please daddy right there..” You moaned out loud as your fingers latched onto his hair, softly tug on them as he moaned against your drippy cunt and suck your clit even harder,earning a particularly loud and lewd moan from you. “mmh! a-ah! i’m gonna—“ He held his finger up then, eyes finding yours as his mouth continues to work on your now sensitive clit. Spencer wasn’t too strict or nothing about your rules but if there’s two that he’s strict about is for you to cum only if he gives you permission— no matter the place or time, if he wants you to cum, you’ll cum— not that it’s hard, with someone as skilled as him.

When you begged and begged, he slapped your thigh only to grunt darkly, “If you can’t shut up and let daddy enjoys this, i’ll fucking take you on the balcony and fuck you for all Manhattan to see. Do you want that, Butterfly? want everyone to see what a filthy college girl you are getting fucked by someone as dangerous as me?” He slapped your cunt then, over and over again as you pant, and mewls.. Body jolts and pulsed at his ministration.

“You’re going to cum like this—“ He paused to spit directly onto your swollen clit, watching it wet the sensitive nub, “Going to cum with daddy slapping your greedy little cunt. Or you are not getting an orgasm.”

“Yes, daddy— oh!” True to his words, he spank you, over and over again, leaving you quivering and brokenly cried at the burning pleasure, “Cum princess, come on, you surely know how to thank daddy don’t you?” Your hole clenched around nothing as you arch your back and sobbed,

“Can’t— daddy please i-“

“You were so fucking desperate to cum, why not now huh? your sensitive cunt surely looks wrecked enough.” He scoffed before he spank your clit so hard you jumped at the sensation before he licked his fingers and caress your clit in fast fanning motion, not giving you enough time to even breathe as your cunt pulses and throb with overwhelming need of release, building up up up, up until you finally trembled and cum all over the bed— an orgasm so intense that you blacked out for few seconds straight.

“Shh.. shh good girl, that’s it— fuck you look so ethereal like this, butterfly.” He muses as he settle his head on your lap and admire your pulsing body, “T-Thank- y-you.. daddy.” You gathered all the strength you have left as he smiled proudly.

Your head laid on his chest as you both cuddle in silence, trying to enjoy the serenity and calm environment around you as the city below you buzzed all round. It was calming for awhile before his phone rang and you involuntarily sighs, “I know pretty girl, i know.” He muttered, before smiling apologetically- Not that he needs to.. Business arrangements, not like you’re his girlfriend or nothing.

love on you,

let me love on you,

You forced your fuzzy subby mind to get the thoughts out, as you watched his figure put on his robe, and leaned down, “I’ll be back later okay, don’t forget to check your phone.” He kissed your forehead for a bit, letting it linger as you held back your tears, wishing he could stay with you, you need your daddy, you really really do need him now. Feeling all small and fuzzy like this. But with the blaring noise of his ringtone, you knew the don has business to take care of and of course you’re not important enough to held such important task to be left.

So you smiled all nicely and kissed all the rings finger on his fingers before bidding a tiny whimper of, “Best of luck, don.” Your head bowed a little in respect as he noticed the true and true sadness flashed across your eyes, but paid it no mind as his other burner phone blared.

“Thank you, Butterfly. Get dressed soon, and i’ll have Morgan bringing you that sandwich from the deli you love so much. I’ll see you soon.”

Oh how nice would it be if this is your life, but life doesn’t always have a happy ending after all.

——

Comment or send me a message if you want to be added to this series taglist!

#spencer reid smut #littlebutterfly #mob!spencer #daddy!spencer #matthew gray gubler smut #mgg smut #insufferableblurb

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namtanlovesfilm · 3 years ago

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OK but what's up with Off rewriting classic Thai literature to make it gay tho, I'm curious 👀

okay so basically when I first saw that special offtay ep I was so intrigued by their costumes & all the references so I searched the original story being referred to. basically khun chang khun phaen is an epic thai poem that existed orally for a very long time from thai troubadours before being written down & published in 1917. it's the story of two main protagonists who are in a love triangle with a woman named wanthong (also mentioned in the special ep & played by an actress or staff.) khun phaen (played by tay) is beautiful but poor & has no status to offer wanthong, while khun chang (played by off with that bald cap lmao) is ugly but rich. in the poem wanthong cannot choose between the two & is condemned to death by the king of ayutthaya.................... bc of course let's punish women for not playing by men's rules lol (: but anyway it's an iconic part of thai literature & in the special ep off WHO CANNOT STOP FLIRTING WITH TAY says that he likes him. tay then jokes that this time around khun phaen & khun chang will be the ones to fall in love as they're still in their costumes, which makes it that off accidentally rewrote an iconic love story that has been told for centuries to make it gay LMAO, I approve :')

xxx

#answers #some thai culture for y'all

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crab-in-a-pocket · 4 years ago

Text

reserved farmer headcanons + meeting the bachelors for the first time!

wanted to make some generally reserved farmer headcanons to kick off this blog and bc i see a lot of very friendly farmers out there and i... am not one of them LMAO

additionally, there's reference to a supposed volatile relationship with a (former?) loved one (projection time!)

also i forgot to open my askbox bc idk how to tumblr ?? i think it's open now (i hope).

tw: drinking and alcoholism, references to past trauma, one Bad Word (sh^t!)

when you first meet everyone, it's a quiet greeting and maybe a witty remark, but you don't stay for any chit-chat

close-lipped smiles are your signature move, along with the Man Nod whenever you run into someone

you are, of course, a nice and courteous person but you don't feel the need to say hello to everyone every damn time you pass by them because, really, you're too busy rushing to Pierre's for some seeds or lugging around foraged beach stuff

okay, maybe some of them think you're a little cold and an introvert who has... problems

but you're not! you are a strong and emotionally stable farmer who gets Shit Done and prefers to observe over participate and think over talk!

mayor lewis is extremely puzzled and almost mistakes you for someone else-- it's been over a decade and people change too much, too soon. he makes a remark about a wishing well your grandfather had built long ago (remember the well? how you fell in it that one time?) and you nod along politely (i didn't fall, i climbed in because i desperately needed my wish to come true)

it's nice to meet people who aren't as temperemental as the tides. maybe, for once, you could have a proper relationship with someone.

alex

easily the most annoying and extroverted person in town what with his obsession with sports and loud, brash personality but you two get along fabulously because you had that same passion for gridball in college before you were too busy being a corporate slave

he's a little surprised that you sit next to him at the saloon but he goes along easily and the conversation flows between the two of you easily, ranging from future plans (thinking of going pro... think i'll make it?) to the weather without sounding like you're making fake smalltalk (i wanted to play pro, too, and here i am now. if you really want it, you'll have to leave this all behind)

there's something genuine about him that's intriguing and it leaves you wanting to find out and see what the real alex is like inside because you can see through that wall he's made

and there's something enigmatic about you, who is reserved and quiet and seems to be a simple open book, when in fact, you are a very attractive onion with many, many layers

sam

you think he's immature. a wildchild, a manchild, a wildmanchild, really. sam, on the other hand, is drawn in by your calmness and how in-control you appear to be-- when you offer to play a game of pool when sebastian doesn't show up, he's delighted at the opportunity to know you better

okay, so he is immature and a wildmanchild but there is a softness in him that surprises you every time he shows it-- which is frequently around you

he has a soft smile to counteract his proud one and he's so in awe of how you get so much stuff done every day (i don't know how you do it, that's gotta be tough), every week, and every month (you'd like the responsibility, i think. to me, it's one big project i need to finish)

he has instant crush on you because you're so cool even though your line of profession really doesn't evoke much awe. i mean, you're attractive, you are so in control of your life, and you have a really cute smile whenever he compliments you-- how could he not?

shane

bit bold of you to sit next to him at the saloon because every knows he's can be a real asshole, but he glances at you with a hint of awe and more than a hint of annoyance. you elect to ignore this and choose to order a whisky on the rocks (if you don't drink, call it apple juice)

whisky: shane's a touch impressed because you look like a lightweight. well, it's nice that someone can hold their liquor. he makes a remark about it (planning on getting drunk, huh?) and you raise a brow at him, looking a little haughty and tell him that it's your drink for the week. he's annoyed at your remark and starts an argument that surprisingly, settles down into a civil conversation

apple juice: he snorts at that and makes a remark about meeting penny for your lessons the next day. you play along and sip at your drink, making witty remarks (thank yoba for hangovers. it's the non-drinker's edge, really. just like not having liver failure). he's not sure if he should be annoyed or impressed at your cool-as-a-cucumber personality, not sure if it's too big city or too closed-off

you offer to buy him a pizza if you can take a away his beer-- at any rate, he looks like he'll end up with liver failure the way he's going. shane aquiesces and devours the entire pizza. your conversation is slow and punctuated with his loud chewing but you're pleasantly suprised that he's quite smart and well-read about whatever you're interested in

the fourth time you sit next to him, he turns down your pizza and doesn't say a word. neither do you and it's almost like it's back to square one until you realize that he hasn't made a single salty remark about anything. you decide to try again the day after tomorrow-- nothing comes too quickly to people like you and shane.

sebastian

it was the necklace you wore that caught his eye. a shining teardrop stone hanging off a gleaming silver chain. he had spoken before he could stop himself and watched as you smiled and told him he was right-- it is supposed to be a Yeti's tear.

you're pleased to meet someone who is also a homebody and a touch more reserved than a lot of other people in town. he's easy to get along with (oh, you're kidding, you really have the signed edition?) and he's got pretty good taste when it comes to literature-- after all, who can refuse a good sci-fi book? (of course i do, i'm dedicated fan)

oddly enough, your conversation is quick and eager and not all reserved. instead of the companionable silence everyone assumes you two to have, you two nearly talk over each other because you finally have someone to complain to about everyone's over-friendliness and he finally has someone who understands what it's like to be trapped in a small world

you tease him about the corporate rat race and he fires back at you about being a part of it. you like sebastian and he likes you-- it's as simple as that.

elliot

he had heard of you through leah who had heard of you through emily who had heard of you through gus who had heard of you from lewis. it was a long grapevine and he's not sure how much of the truth was preserved and it's almost a relief to meet you because, to be frank, he's tired of being the town's newcomer.

first-- you're not peppy and overly cheerful at all. second, you are definitely not hot-tempered. and third, there's something so fascinating about you, something hidden under your calm, pragmatic character. he finds a kindred spirit in you, save for the flowery words and, admittedly, the vanity.

you're amused to meet a writer living on the beach. the cabin was built by one of your grandfather's old friends, a rather surly man who had taken a liking to you when you were much younger. while the hut is in no way fancy, you can't help but consider how pretentious and, contrastingly, humble the writer must be. pretentious in such a way that he thinks living in a sandy, damp shack is a way to beat writer's block (it's odd, it's rarely a choice people make) and humble in such a way that he accepts and bears with living in a worn house with little complaint (it's admirable, if not a little silly!)

you find yourself in his company late at night when you can't sleep and it's so easy to open up to him because he's kind, he listens, and most importantly, he's not embarassed to admit he's got faults, at least to you. you let him see past your collected facade and into your cracked heart far sooner than you think and elliot doesn't mind at all

harvey

you might be the most mysterious person in town simply because of the way you present yourself. he finds himself always stuttering a little whenever you're around because of the way you watch him, set in a relaxed stance, your gaze flat and cool. later, he realizes that it's your resting face. he wonders about what you'd look like if you smiled-- really smiled

he's touched at the fact that you buy him coffee whenever he had to patch you up-- which is frequently, given your liking for the mines. you're adorable when he gives you general anesthesia. he had run out of local anesthesia and you needed a fair amount of stitches and though you told him that you have a high pain tolerance (stitches are far more painful than you think. i really don't want to put you through that), he insisted and you let him (fine, fine. get on with it, doctor). you had let out several inappropriate jokes under anesthesia and your cheeks had hurt from laughing non-stop

harvey's entranced. there's no other way to put it-- he's bewitched by your bright character hiding under that collected facade. he never pries for your secrets because he's got secrets, too. you like harvey because he's sweet and compassionate and even though he has to put up a firm, professional affectation, he wears his heart on his sleeve.

you see him as a friend at first, all platonic and it seems to be the end of it. but one day, as you hand him a coffee, he laughs and smiles and hands you a coffee just the way you like it. you're falling for him so hard and fast you think someone's put a spell on you that makes you notice the minute expressions on his face and mull over the way he talks to you. you're in love with him-- you can only hope he feels the same way too

#stardew elliott #stardew harvey #stardew sam #stardew shane #stardew alex #stardew sebastian #stardew headcanon #stardew farmer #sdv hcs #sdv headcanons #sdv sebastian #sdv elliott #sdv harvey #sdv sam #sdv alex #sdv shane #sdv reserved farmer #sdv farmer #my phone hates me but here :D

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enjennie · 4 years ago

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Bottom’s Up

synopsis: the dreamies during a night of drinking somehow end up talking about their exes, revealing the different types of relationships and exes they have or had.

a/n: this has been long been in my drafts so Jisung was still a minor here, thus I didn’t give him any drinks lmao. Enjoy! btw, I’m still deciding if I should make Haechan’s backstory for this, or if the markHyuck one should do…

[10:37]

The boys have arrived, piling into Chenle’s condominium that was set up just to have their long awaited guys night. They planned this weeks prior, promising each other that after their finals they’d set aside time to drink away their thoughts and release any stress they have that built up.

By 10:50 bottles have been popped and cups have been poured, the boys sat in the balcony to feel the cool air of the city night.

“You guys really aren’t sharing?” Jisung watches as the older boys raise their glasses in celebration.

“You wait a few more months, sir,” Mark sets his glass down and pats the younger boy on the shoulder. Guy nights wouldn’t be complete without Jisung, even if he wasn’t allowed to drink yet. He never minded sitting in the living room, playing with Chenle’s console with Jaemin and then later on laughing at his older friends’ shenanigans once the alcohol hit them.

Renjun isn’t quite the drinker, but Haechan made him a bet and unfortunately, he lost. Being an art major wasn’t easy, he knew he had a few more things to finish before his semester ended but with that, Renjun drank to forget.

Besides his plates, he had nothing else to worry about. He’d been getting emails from companies waiting for him to graduate, a family happy to support him, but surprisingly, the boy lacked in the love department.

His previous relationships, only being flings and one night stands, none of them really ever stayed after the cuddles. Except… a particular someone.

On the opposite side of him sat Jeno, who was watching his friends in amusement. Now, Jeno has a high alcohol tolerance. Although he becomes chatty, and starts to excessively clean his surroundings, he takes care of his friends well. Usually he’s the one who tucks them into bed or prevents anything like drunk driving and some other stupid shit to happen.

Jeno the architectural major was the responsible friend in a night out. The single friend who starts playing the guitar to set the mood when 2am rolls in. And, the single friend with the broken heart, which hasn’t quite mended yet even after three years.

Haechan on the other hand, is a messy drunk but handles his alcohol well until the 2nd bottle. The boy has a lot going on in his mind, and was the first to initiate the plan to drink.

His phone rings, but Haechan dismisses it, tapping the red decline button and watching as the screen faded into black. Mark follows his eyes and hesitantly brings it up.

“Aren’t you going to talk to her?”

Haechan only shakes his head before taking another swig. Everyone knows well enough about Haechan and his girlfriend’s on and off relationship. They break up, make up, fight and the cycle repeats.

Mark’s adam’s apple bobs as he asks another question. “Why don’t you just break up? Y’know… for good?”

The boys around them seem to have noticed the tension that built up and had their eyes fixed on the pair.

“I don’t know, man,” Haechan is too drunk to think about Mark’s question. Too drunk to realize how Mark completely sold himself off to be in love with him with that one question. It wasn’t a big secret, especially since Mark has done a poor job in hiding it, but apparently not bad enough for Haechan to see. Everyone knew, except for the clueless boy.

Jaemin was too busy babysitting Chenle, who was having his first drink tonight, to even have shots of his own. He didn’t like drinking, anyway, and used Chenle as an excuse to keep sober.

Jaemin the medical student naturally tells his friends to lay off the alcohol, as it can damage their liver. He can only do so much though, as the others tend to be hard-headed and stubborn.

“I can handle myself!” Chenle protests, reaching for his glass which Jaemin took away. “You’re supposed to drink, eat a lot then drink again,” Jaemin explains. “You’ve only taken drinks so far, you’ll be knocked out in an hour if you keep this up,” He tells Chenle.

Of course, Jaemin knew his way around drinking. He just didn’t enjoy it, doesn’t like the bitter taste of it. Didn’t like how it made him think of his past either. Jaemin’s cup remains half full, and he uses this tactic to not get refills.

It keeps him away from his phone, sober enough to know better than to drunk text her. Even if her presence was all he yearned for at a night like this.

Jaemin x Reader – By My Side

[COMING SOON]

[12:03]

As the night gets deeper, so do the conversations between the close friends. Just like Jaemin predicted, Chenle had his head down on the table already, passed out.

“Jeno, you know what to do,” Jaemin nodded his head, signaling the boy beside him. Jeno gave him his smile, which now looked more drowsy and silly because of his tipsy state.

Jeno lifts Chenle easily, with Jaemin assisting him, leaving the three boys on the table.

“I want ____. Where is she?” Chenle had his eyes closed, mumbling to his friends. Jaemin and Jeno exchanged looks and laughed at the younger.

Poor boy, had a ton of expectations to meet he couldn’t even date around.

Chenle’s main priority had to be his family, and their business. He couldn’t afford any distractions, but to him, she was more than that. She was his driving force, and it hurt the boy to be keeping her a secret. Only the boys knew about his secret relationship, if word got out that Zhong Chenle the son of the most well-respected corporate business owner was dating, it would be the entirety of Shanghai talking about it.

As much as he wanted nothing more than to show the world and tell everyone who he’s in love with, he knew she wasn’t ready to face it all and step into that kind of light yet.

Chenle x Reader – In The Limelight

While the two boys took Chenle into his room, it left the three boys and Haechan’s buzzing phone out in the cold night air that the terrace provided.

“What happened this time?” Renjun asks, in line with the phone that’s close to annoying the hell out of him if it doesn’t stop vibrating the entire table. Haechan had his head down, and he lets out a laugh. Humorless, just cold.

“I don’t get her. She wants me, then the next second she doesn’t,”

When the boy lifts his head, it’s made obvious of all the pain he’s been hiding. His eyes, teary and sullen. Renjun couldn’t help but laugh at his friend’s face, clapping his hands and throwing his head back in laughter. “Aw, c’mon man! It’s only 12am,”

This, however, doesn’t humor Mark the same way. Seeing Haechan in pain was like a bullet through his heart. He gave the boy a pat on the back and watches as his head fall once again. Mark swears he saw a tear fall too.

“I’m not just an object you can set aside, then use when needed,” Haechan continues to wail. Although he was already drunk, Mark felt that Haechan’s words were the most sober when he wasn’t.

As for Mark, the literature major didn’t care much about alcohol. However, it did get his creative juices flowing. Most of Mark’s best written pieces were done when he couldn’t even remember writing them.

During blurry nights intoxicated in alcohol, Mark’s thoughts flow easily through him and onto the sheets of paper that lie around his room. Sometimes, he’ll drink on a school night to get an essay finished for it’s due date the next day.

But seeing as he had no pending things to write, Mark drank for the sake of trying to numb himself somehow. Although it didn’t work well when the person he’s trying to get his mind off of is sat right beside him, thinking of someone else.

Mark x Haechan – Always, I’ll Care

[COMING SOON]

[1:13 am]

When Jaemin and Jeno came back, Jeno was already carrying a guitar. He strums it softly to a random tune he came up with on the spot. Haechan, of course, was singing along. Throwing in words like ‘baby’ and murmuring a few words about love. By now, Renjun’s cheeks were pink and a few hiccups had already escaped him.

“Do you remember that girl Jeno dated second semester of senior year?” he says, out of the blue.

The boys need not ask who, as they all knew who Renjun was referring to. The group of boys burst into fits of laughter and the guitar takes an abrupt stop as its player shoots his friends a nasty look for bringing up his past unprovoked.

“You were smitten, bro,” Mark smacks Jeno’s shoulder as he giggles.

Jeno daggers his eyes to Renjun, who has his head thrown back, laughing.

“How about you, huh? What was her name? _____-“ Jeno begins his avengement by mentioning the name he knew would get back at Renjun. He gets cut off shortly.

“I’ll stop you right there, sir,” Renjun places a hand over Jeno’s mouth before he could speak the name.

“C’mon, how many years has that been though?” Jeno asks after getting the boy’s hand off of his mouth.

“Two, and what about it?” Renjun defensively counters, surprising the other boys.

“He knows! Wow, do you keep count?” Jaemin chuckles, amusement all over his face.

“Shut up, ____ ,” Renjun points a finger at the male, mentioning the name of Jaemin’s past lover. Jaemin’s jaw drops and he crosses his arms,

“That was low,” The corner of his lips tugged into a smile nonetheless.

“C’mon, guys. It’s not like we’re releasing bad omens talking about our exes,” Haechan tugs on Renjun to sit him back down.

“Easy for you to say, you’ve only had one ex and she’s your girlfriend,” Renjun huffs. No one dared to speak the name of Renjun’s ex around him aside from people who have balls like Jeno, Jaemin, Haechan and Mark.

It wasn’t because he was bitter about her. But try as he might, there was a feeling within him that says she’s the one. Or she was. And Renjun was stuck, thinking about all the what if’s. Even after 2 years.

Renjun x Reader – To Be So Lonely [COMING SOON]

“I see things are getting heated over here,” Jisung stood by the door to the balcony now, with a sly smirk on his face.

“Ah right, let’s talk about mister lover boy over here,” Jeno motioned to the younger boy, who surprisingly is the only one to have a love life at the moment.

Jisung was courting the student body president. He could not, however, get her to answer him, but the boy never gives up.

“You must have some balls to hit on your senior,” Jaemin comments. The student body president was in fact two years older than Jisung, but the boy was determined.

Jisung x Reader – Like A Fool

[COMING SOON]

“At least one of us is progressing in terms of love,” Renjun sighed.

“Jeno’s doing well though, isn’t he? Lots of girls always after him,” Jisung gestures to the male beside him who’d started playing the guitar once again.

“I don’t think that counts as doing well,” Jeno mutters, absentmindedly.

“Oh yeah? And how does having half the school pine over you not count as doing well?” Jaemin lightly nudges his friend.

“Because the one I love, is in someone else’s arms right now,”

And cue the exaggerated crying and wailing of his friends, who’d given him sympathetic pats on the back.

Jeno x Reader – We Find Love

[COMING SOON]

“Oh, man,” grumbled Haechan, clearly already very intoxicated. He placed his head between his hands to try and stop his world from spinning. “I got to go to her, I have to say sorry,”

The boys all averted their eyes to the boy who looks to be having his spiritual awakening.

Mark’s heart dropped upon hearing Haechan’s words. He looked down at his hands and sighed. It wouldn’t be the first time Haechan had a sudden realization and wanted to be in his girlfriend’s arms right then and there.

It usually happened when he was smashed drunk, after the 7th or 8th cup. Asking his mates to take him home and running into the arms of his girl.

Mark didn’t know why he wasn’t used to it at this point. It isn’t and never will be him.

“No way,” Jaemin tutted. “You gathered us all here to drink and bothered us for weeks then you’ll flake midway? I don’t think so,” The other boys agreed.

Renjun stretched his arms and fell back onto the chair he sat on. “What’s with the sudden change of atmosphere anyway? It’s like we did release bad omens when we spoke about our exes,”

“You just had to bring ____ up!” Jeno threw a fry at his friend, who was the first to mention his ex and start the discussion. Renjun caught the fry in his mouth, surprising the boys and himself.

“Let’s just drink up,” Renjun raises his glass in the air, although it’s half empty.

“Nice try, here have a refill. We’re all taking equal shots,” Mark had risen and was now reaching for the bottle of beer to pour his friend’s glass.

“To… I don’t know- fuck! To getting fucked up!” Haechan yelled, raising his glass in the air.

The rest of the boys do the same, clinking glasses together and downing it mercilessly to their livers.

Relationships come and go, but the dreamies are always here to stay.

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vtforpedro · 3 years ago

Text

health update - long, long post

two out of three appointments done!! good news all around. first, with my hematologist... so apparently I've been in remission since december and didn't know it because the literature talks about milestones you have to reach for the type of leukemia I have but lmao ???? hey I've been in remission for almost eight months, cool ;P if I go two years with no signs of leukemia, we can extend my appts out! but for now we will still check labs every three months my endocrinologist sent me to an Expert Thyroid Radiologist and she said my ultrasound on the goiter/nodules looked good enough to not even need another ultrasound again (barring any major changes in numbers, I imagine) and my tsh levels are excellent so 👌 don't have to do labs again for a year!! I see my rheum on the 3rd and I imagine it will go much the same way as I've already seen my labs and they look ok to my layman's eyes lol and thank god she let me switch to a telehealth appt so I don't have to go in for this one because I had to go in yesterday to my hematologist's office hnnnn this is all really good news and feels great but GOD! it's extremely hard to tell what's been giving me symptoms since CML, hypothyroidism, and of course rheumatic diseases all cause intense fatigue, appetite weirdness, skin problems and more. but depression/anxiety/ptsd also cause all of these things and so do both of my neurological conditions. my rheum thinks the basic symptoms my PCP was concerned about for lupus or scleroderma is the whole shebang combined and I'm sure she's right it's always been the neuro shit that's given me the worst symptoms and agony and extreme discomfort I've ever felt in my life lol and that has an uncertain and at this moment frightening future so... yeah, we'll see where I'm at in a few months I guess and if there's been any improvement. but fighting what happens in my brain every day is the most exhausting thing I've ever done and the damage it does to my mental health cannot be understated, which my neurologist loves to do! so as soon as I do a couple tests he ordered I'm finding a new one. not for new answers, but only for someone not a complete mess of a person who contradicts themselves constantly within the same breath y'all my last appointment with him was absolutely BANANAS. he spent more time complaining about the company he worked for and defending himself and justifying himself to himself??? than like. treating me lol he makes so so so many mistakes, he lies, and I'm still boiling over the question he asked on the phone on july 1st 'so did anyone go over your MRI results with you?' (from mid-APRIL) like do you mean YOU, SIR???? god. he reviewed them with me on my appt on july 14th and got all huffy about them doing 'the wrong MRI' cause I was supposed to have an MRV, not an MRA, and yet he has put in like 6 or 7 orders (four in the same day) for an MRA, including on the 14th, just in case you need a picture of what this man is like. I could make three whole posts about him, he's chaotic and not in a good way him: 'well you've lost 30 pounds and with IIH, that should show improvement. and since there's no improvement, that's very uncharacteristic so it could be something else. but also keep in mind that even with losing the weight there may not be any improvement in IIH symptoms' hmm still working that one out anyway I've had insomnia for the majority of my life and only medical marijuana helped. I'd go to bed at midnight and not fall asleep until 3 AM if I was lucky before I tried it. now that I can't be on it, but I am at war with my brain 24/7, I'm sleeping the whole night through better than I have for most of my life 😒 this sounds like a good thing, but I'm still exhausted waking up every morning. my brain can't catch up on rest while it's this bad I still don't have a lot of hope for this shit. and it is IIH, he just doesn't want to say it. we all know it's IIH, it's literally the one explanation and fits all my symptoms. I wish it had been the easiest one to cure and was gone because it's a living hell. gonna continue

working toward my goals and hope my health is eventually as kind to me for this as it's been for the CML I really want to go to therapy to deal with the trauma of the last year and a half but I can't have a conversation, especially not an emotional one, and I can't process or think very well when talking to someone anymore. it sucks and it's scary feeling my brain function is not what it was just two or three months ago. memory 👎 decision making skills 👎 processing questions 👎 mixing things up/confusing myself on the daily? 👍 neuro referred me to a neuropsychologist for cognitive function stuff so yeah. hoping for a miracle at this point anyway, pretty proud of myself for losing weight though and in a healthy way. my neurologist, neurosurgeon and psychiatrist seemed doubtful I could do it on my own, but my 31lbs gone says hey fuck you lmao 19 more to my big first goal! even if it doesn't fix IIH and I have to have surgery, not being obese anymore will make it safer and I'll feel better all around. started at 210 and I'm now at 179 c: sorry for good news and also doom and gloom but s i g h at least there's forward progress in some ways, right?

#medical #personal #vtforpedro personal #I just saw someone mention oversharing as being like a bad trait #so I'm sorry if me blogging about my health issues is uncomfortable or feels like oversharing but it helps me #i'll always have these to look back on #I also only have like two people to talk to about this stuff otherwise and I need to really let it all out so I can breathe #but now I'm rethinking if I should've ever started blogging about my health in the first place hnnnn #i really am sorry if they make you uncomfortable so i added a new tag you can blacklist #anyway love you all please stay safe and healthy

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hops-hunny · 3 years ago

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Professor Neville:D

So reader makes Neville jealous by flirting with her classmates infront of him so he fuck her hard

PRONOUNS: SHE/HER

UGHH PLEASE THIS IS GOING TO BE SO FUN

Neville knew being with the bird was wrong. If he were in any other situation, dating someone two years your junior wouldn't have been a bad problem, in fact no one would bat an eye. However, when that person two years your junior is your student, that's truly when the issue arises.

He didn't mean for it to happen, he truly didn't. Life always has different plans and now a year later after a rushed confession towards the end of the year and a summer spent together, him and (Y/n) were absolutely mad for each other. And when you're in love with someone, you'll go to any length to keep that love safe and thriving.

Sometimes she did catch him off guard though. Like the time she wore her skirt from first year, claiming that the reason she adorned the skimpy little thing was because she 'thought it was her usual one', or the time she took full advantage of his snacks allowed in class policy, sucking and licking along the pretty red sucker. It wouldn't have been a problem if she didn't sit in the seat directly in front of his desk, and it also wouldn't have been a problem if it weren't for the little noises she made under her breath. Neville never said anything though.

He knew it'd be inappropriate as her superior to say anything, after all there wasn't anything that was explicitly sexual about her actions. What would he say even, "Hey seeing your pretty little ass hang halfway out that skirt is giving me a raging stiffy during class."? That sounded like a one way ticket to losing his job, which was the last thing he wanted to do. So he let her get away with it, pretending her petty little actions didn't affect him.

"Alright, I think it's about time we start." Neville said, causing the class to come to a standstill, turning their attention to the front of the room. "Can anyone tell me what this flower is? I'll give you a hint, it's said to be the most beautiful of any known recorded record of flowers."

"Although (L/n) is the most beautiful girl in the class, she's not a flower. Is that what you're on about Professor Longbottom?" Jax said loudly from the middle of the room, causing the class to break out in giggles and whispers. He watched as the girl turned around to face the boy, giving him a small smile.

"How come? I think I'm very flower-like." she pouted at Jax, eyeing him closely. She watched as the boy leaned forward, a smirk present on his face.

"Y'know, you may be onto something love. You are like a flower, delicate, beautiful, and I bet you're real easy to make fall apart to." a chorus of 'ooo's sounded around the class as the boy finished causing Neville to clear his throat.

"That's enough class, I wasn't referring to Miss (L/n). No offense, you're a very lovely girl. However, Jax, this flower up here on my desk is the one I'm talking about!" He clasped his hand's together, stepping to the side to give the class a better view. He smiled as they looked upon it with wonder, noises of amazement fluttering around the class. As they were distracted, his eyes flickered to her. His felt a bit of warmth spread on his cheeks as he watched her (e/c) eyes examine the flower a mere foot away from her.

"Well, all of you will be responsible for taking care of one of these for the rest of the week." He paused as they all groaned, liking the appreciating part but not the actual caring of the plant. "Let me finish next time guys! There's two pros to this. One, you can choose a partner that you want and two, if you write a poem about how the flower makes you feel you won't have any homework for your Literature class." He rolled his eyes at the cheers, dismissing them to go pair off. Although most people went to their usuals, what he wasn’t expecting was for (Y/n) to pair off with Jax, considering she’d usually pair with her best friend who sat right next to her. He shot the girl a look causing her to shrug, not knowing what her best friend was up to either.

'Don't overthink it, I'm sure it's nothing.' He thought to himself as he walked around the greenhouse as he made sure each pair were on the right track. As he neared (Y/n)'s desk, he couldn't help but eavesdrop on the conversation.

"Boyfriend? I'm sure he doesn't fuck you as well as I could, does he?" He heard the boy mutter as he leaned closer to her ear, using a few fingers to brush some of her hair back. Neville watched the sight unfold from the corner of his eye, trying to not lose it on the spot. (Y/n) was a very calm and capable girl. She would make the right choices, right? Wrong. The girl was also the minx with the slyness of a fox. He watched as she giggled, twirling her hair along her finger. That was the final straw for Neville. What should he do? How could he handle her without making it obvious. A metaphorical lightbulb appeared above his head.

“Alright, in order to give you and your partner's time to work on the project, you all are free to leave for the rest of the hour.” He watched as the students began to flood from the room, gripping (Y/n)’s arm as she tried sneaking out. Luckily for him, she was also the last student which prompted him to lock the door behind her. “Except for you Mrs.(L/n). It seems you need some extra lessons on how to behave. What a shame you’ll be giving up your free period to spend time with me.” He whispered against the back of her neck before lifting her, setting her down on his desk. She gave him a sultry look before wrapping her arms around his neck.

“A shame indeed.”

ANNND part 2 will be up eventually my back hurts rn and I'm sleepy so use your imagination till then LMAO

#brattysblurbs:neville #neville longbottom x reader #neville x reader

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thejgatsbykid · 3 years ago

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Hi, I was reading some Charlotte Bronte criticisms and I saw your post so I have a question. I read Jane Eyre a while ago and I got the impression that it was subtly racist and/or xenophobic, and promoting British imperialism? Helen Burn's comment about non-christians, Rochester's comparisons between the non-British women he's loved and his wife vs Jane plus St. John - I feel like Charlotte Bronte leans into and promotes that? What do you think? Thanks and have a nice day.

Thank you for the ask!

So I'm gonna preface this by saying: the majority of British literature from, oh, the 18th century onwards is, by virtue of being British literature during the height of classic colonialism, going to be racist, xenophobic, and pro-imperialist to one degree or another. Even if it's not blatant, unapologetic propaganda (looking at you Rudyard Kipling) it is steeped in the culture of an England that derives almost all of its wealth, resources, value, and cultural identity from being an imperialist oppressor. That's just… unavoidable. It's the background radiation of English society. (Exceptions made, obviously, for specifically anti-colonial and post-colonial literature, but the uhhh majority of the English literary canon is. Not that.) Furthermore, as argued in this article, one purpose of a lot of Victorian literature was to paint over Victorian crimes against humanity- "Many imperial officials moonlighted in both the active (killing) part of the genocides, and the passive PR side. Many were very popular writers, and all their doorstop books were virtuous, virtuous, oh so virtuous."

Charlotte Bronte (and her sisters, and Dickens, and Thomas Hardy, and many other writers of the era) wasn't an imperial officer, obviously. But that doesn't erase the cultural influence that Victorian imperialism had on Victorian writers, nor their dependence on Victorian colonial brutality to maintain their lifestyles of blood-soaked Victorian comfort through stolen wealth. Which isn't to say that none of that literature has value, obviously, just that, you know. It's definitely all at least a little racist.

Jane Eyre, however, definitely falls on the "more" side of the "more or less racist" scale. Jane Eyre is, at times, abominably racist. You've named more instances than I can remember (not having read the entirety of it in uhhh long time) but like… yeah. All of that. Plus the anti-Romani racism in Rochester's weird little fortune teller costume thing (which is just… so fucking weird and uncomfortable for so many reasons lmao) and the inherent racism/xenophobia/imperialism of missionary work as a rule. I assume this is about my Bertha Mason post tho so I'll talk a little more about her.

The paragraph introducing Bertha Mason is by itself, in academic terms, a fucking doozy, in that it refers to her consistently as "it" and describes her with some of the most dehumanizing language I've ever encountered ("whether beast or human being, one could not, at first sight, tell" "it snatched and growled like some strange wild animal" "the clothed hyena rose up, and stood tall on its hind-feet" it GOES ON). See here an essay alluding to Bertha Mason's role as a specter of the evils of race-mixing, a la HP Lovecraft, which, yikes!

Now all that isn't to say that all the racism in Jane Eyre makes it, like. Worthless as a novel. Like I said, all Victorian literature is a little racist, backdrop of colonial brutality, maintaining the visage of a polite society through propaganda, etc. Personally I think Jane Eyre sucks and isn't worth reading by itself, and I think, like all the books we venerate as classics, it DEFINITELY needs to be read with a critical eye to its flaws (personally I would pair it with Anne Bronte's Tenant of Wildfell Hall or Charlotte Perkins Gilman's The Yellow Wallpaper to highlight the violence against women, or with Conrad's The Heart of Darkness or another anti-imperialist book (sadly I'm not as well versed in anti or post colonial literature as I'd like to be, I'm dead certain there are Indian or Caribbean writers with some bangin post-colonial lit to contrast) to highlight the racist/colonial themes) but, like, I only have a bachelor's in lit so the Literary Canon doesn't care what I have to say lmao.

#said Jamie #long post #this is a bronte hate blog #kept all this off my Austen blog bc i know some of my followers there are into jane Eyre and i always feel bad saying it sucks lol

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writefasttalkevenfaster · 4 years ago

Text

Spencer Reid / Uncertainties

Prompt: Kissing tears away

Summary: Everyone is afraid of the uncertain, but no one more than a man of facts and statistics -- Dr. Spencer Reid.

Word Count: 1,870

Warnings: Angst + Fluff, comforting, Spencer’s headaches, this man deserves love, mentions of mental illness (schizophrenia), I make a doctor who reference lmao

Spencer Reid was a man of many thoughts. And that was a clear understatement.

A lot of his thoughts were spoken — facts given freely, statistics that spewed from his mouth, and certainties conveyed without a bit uncertainty. But these were facts, facts he had surrounded himself in carefully constructed walls, buildings, and bridges, until it became a labyrinth. A perfect solitude of his own making — certainties were certain, unlike most things in his life.

Including you.

"Spence, can I sit with you?" His eyes flitted up from the book he was reading, finding you sitting before he even had a chance to open his mouth.

"Doesn't look like I have much of a choice," but he smiles, and your eyes twinkle at his teasing.

"Why wait when I know the answer is yes?"

And you were right. The answer was always yes when it came to you — that much was certain. At least according to Morgan and Garcia.

"Why aren't you in your office?" You crossed your arms, brow creased in frustration.

You sigh dramatically, "Penelope brought her boyfriend by and now they have completely taken over my space," Pout, as you rest your chin against your hand, "it's fine because it's Pen, but it's just a little nauseating to be around a couple that often. I think he’s spent more time there in the last week than I have in the last month."

He snorts, "I didn't know love caused nausea," the corner of his mouth twitches, and you roll your eyes.

"It does when you're painfully single," you sigh dramatically, shaking your head, “Side-effects include nausea, fake vomiting, and contemplation and eventual purchase of noise canceling headphones. Only cure in my case — a date.”

"Then get a date?" He offers. The words left his mouth without a second thought, ignoring the twinge in his chest at the thought of you with someone else.

You raise a brow, "You offering, Doctor?"

He blinks, a heat climbing his neck, and he's all too painfully aware of how your eyes linger on the blush that's undoubtedly spread across his cheeks and the graze of your teeth against your bottom lip.

"I-I-" but you wave him off.

"It's okay, Spence," you begin to get up, but the question remains very much in the air, an albatross wrapped around his neck, squeezing and squeezing.

"Wait," he says your name, giving you pause as he licks his incredibly dry lips, "I am," he manages, heart beating against his ribs, "offering that is."

The indelible tension becomes even more unbearable as you blatantly stare at him, becoming more and more difficult not to tug at the collar of his button up — regretting the choice of a sweater vest combo with how unbearably hot its become.

But then your face lights up, eyes wide and lips broken in an unabashed grin, "What time?"

Maybe he shouldn’t have offered. Maybe he shouldn’t have listened to that small voice in the back of his head, that sounded awfully like Morgan, to take a chance. Because then he wouldn’t have learned that you majored in Linguistics and English Literature. He wouldn’t have learned that your undergraduate thesis was on the parallels of Beowulf and Tolkien and the meaning of brotherhood. He wouldn’t have learned that your nose wrinkles very adorably when you try a new dish. He wouldn’t have learned that he liked how your voice got louder when you were passionate. He wouldn’t have fallen in love with you.

But he was, he realized one morning, as your fingers carded through his thick curls one afternoon, hoping that the dreaded phone call wouldn’t come and interrupt your dinner plans tonight. You hummed and gasped appropriately as you listened to him read a new book you had picked up (as it was your turn to choose a book for the two of you to read this week). And it was when you had plucked the book from his hands, peering down at him, his head against your legs, with a soft smile and wide eyes, he realized that he didn’t remember a single moment of his life that had felt so right.

Until it didn't.

He knew the symptoms. Sensitivity to light. Persistent headaches. An inability to focus. Irritability. Hallucinations. And he knew the odds. His leg bounced up and down in the waiting room — the one time facts did not play to his advantage — eyes squeezed shut. Soon, he would begin to forget things. Become confused or delusional. And he would lose one of the only things he felt that had some control over — his mind. Pain splintered through his head, as yet another doctor called him in for his results.

Inconclusive, again. The fifth doctor to have run a litany of tests on him: physical, emotional, and psychological — but no cause.

He doesn’t remember the doctor’s name, her introduction stymied by the red hot throbbing in his frontal cortex, “Do you have anyone to support you during this time?” his fingers dug into his forearms.

“I do,” he manages, and he can almost feel your touch, your presence, as if you were here. Your arms wrapped around him, chin pressed into his shoulder, but your eyes — eyes full of pity. He still hadn’t told you.

But it didn’t mean you hadn’t noticed.

"Spencer," you wave your hand in front of his face, and he looks up from his book, "I've been calling your name for five minutes."

"Sorry, I was reading," he murmurs, sliding his bookmark into his book, shutting the book in his lap, "what's wrong?"

Your brow furrowed, arms crossed across your chest, "I should be asking you that,"

"What is that supposed to mean?" He knew he was wrong — he knew he had been short, that he had been angry, that he had been silent, but he didn't care. He couldn't find the energy to. All he could think about was the dull ache in his head, the echoing in his ears, the fear thrumming through his body, possibilities running over and over and over—

"Spencer," you ease the book through his fingers, "I know you — you would have blown through this entire book by now, but you've been reading the same page for the last half hour."

He snatches the book from your hand, hardback clattering against the floor, "You don't know anything,"

"Spencer—"

"No, no—" he holds his voice steady, holding the fracturing pieces of his facade together, "just leave."

"I'm not leaving you," your voice cracks, not bothering to hide your hurt, "not until you tell me what's going on."

He looks up and sees your gaze waver. And he hates himself. He hates himself for hurting you. He hates himself for allowing himself to love you. He should have learned his lesson. He should have learned when his parents separated, when his mom’s delusions and paranoia turned her from the woman who read him stories of knights to a woman who barely remembered her own name. He hates himself for being too weak to break up with you.

“Do you know what it’s like to be afraid of your own mind?” he whispers, the dull ache in his brain quelling for a moment, the tightness in his chest replacing it.

You blink, eyes glassy, sliding in place beside him, his eyes falling to his lap, “Why would you be afraid of something so beautiful?”

“Because I don’t know what it’s going to become,” he cradles his head in his hands, “I’ve been having headaches. Consistently. I can’t focus. I can’t sleep. I am...hearing things that are not there. I—”

“Spencer,” you whisper, “why didn’t you tell me before?”

He laughs, the sound hollow in his chest, “What is there to tell? Doctors can’t tell me what this is. They can’t tell me if it’s—-” he breaks off, and he refuses to look up. He refuses to see the pity in your eyes — the fear.

“Baby, you don’t know what this even is right now, we—”

“What else could it be?” he snaps, ringlets of pain coursing through his head, “I know the chances. I’ve known the chances since I was seven, when I found out my mother had schizophrenia when I overheard my parents arguing again. I’m the same age as she was when she first started showing symptoms.”

Schizophrenia. The word hangs over the conversation like it has hung over him his entire life. A part of him thought maybe, somehow, if he was smart enough, even if he had it, he could outsmart it — maybe he could overcome it. But a few weeks of these headaches any delusions of grandeur — except for the ones yet to come, “Spencer, even if it is schizophrenia, it is treatable. It is manageable with medication and proper treatment. More importantly, no matter the odds, no matter what this is, I’m going to be there—”

“Until you’re not,”

“Spencer,”

“You don’t know what it’s like,” His words are soft, as he remembers the warmth of his mother, curled up beside him, her soft voice reading stories of Arthur and his round table, “to watch someone you love become someone else — someone you don’t even recognize anymore. Someone angry, someone paranoid.”

“I don’t know what it’s like, Spencer, I’m sorry, but I know I’d never leave you. Even if you become someone else, even if I lose you altogether — I love you. For who you are, and you will become,” you reach for his face, but he turns away, licking his lips, “I always will.”

“Nothing is certain,” he sighs, running his hands down his face, “But I know I can’t make you do this—”

“Spencer, please,” you lean down, prying his fingers away from his face, and forcing him to look at you — tears running down your cheeks freely, your nose wrinkling as you sniffled, “shut up.”

“I—”

“I know nothing is certain — nothing ever is. But this is how I feel right now, in this moment,” you draw closer, and he allows you to — taking solace in your closeness and warmth. Your lips brush against his forehead, “We will figure this out, together.”

A tear slips down his cheek, and he squeezes his eyes shut, “I don’t want you to feel like you have to—”

“I don’t have to do anything,” you press a kiss to his cheek, right as the tear rolls down, “and I never do anything I don’t want to,” the corners of your mouth tug at your lips, “remember the Doctor Who convention?”

“I remember compromising my choice,” you laugh.

“And I remember you being the cutest David Tennant ever,” his fingers brush away the streaks of tears left behind on your cheeks, “I don’t need to have a Tardis to know we are going to get through this.”

“Well, actually—” you raise an eyebrow, and he smiles.

“I love you.”

“I love you too,” his hands cup your cheeks now, breath fanning against your lips, as he kisses you. Tears roll over his fingers, as your fingers rest over his own, “and that is a certainty.”

#spencer reid #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid imagines #spencer reid fanfiction #spencer reid x you #criminal minds #criminal minds imagines #criminal minds fanfiction #cm #cm imagines #cm fanfiction #reid x reader #reid x you

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