#Haven't seen that fucker in A YEAR AND THAT WHAT HE REMEMBERS

[ray935sworld]

My friend: so anything new happening recently?

Me: I was pretty close to losing a 3rd sense due to my medication :3

Him: Why can't you say a normal thing just once? Idk maybe that you got a girlfriend? But no. Instead this shit or you bargaining with an Italian drug dealer

Me: That was ONE TIME 2.5 years ago.

[chvoswxtch]

hi!!!!!!

so excited for movie night!!!! <3

could I possibly have a romcom (directors cut edition) with ftws!bucky pls!!

something along the lines of, "all you had to do was ask," if yk what I mean 😏😙😇

hi nonnie!!! welcome!!

fatws bucky has my whole ass heart. I don't know what they did to him in thunderbolts and i'm scared so i'm gonna pretend like that's not happening rn and we will go back to a simpler time <3

unfortunately since you're on anon, I can't do the directors cut, but I will give you some delicious bucky visuals and set the scene for your imagination to run wild ;)

headcannon below the cut

cruel intentions starring bucky barnes

bucky barnes is a shithead. if you don't believe me, I implore you to watch the entirety of fatws and point out one time he isn't being a sassy, snarky, taunting lil fucker (and we love him for it, i adore my bitchy lil grumpy super solider)

also the man has been through it so I think he's earned the right to be bitchy

being a super soldier means that everything about bucky is enhanced (😉) which includes his senses. now he's not quite at matt murdock level of heightened senses, but he can tell certain things about people (think cap in the elevator with the hydra agents clocking that shit from a mile away). he's also learned to read body language as a former assassin

combine all that with how well bucky knows you, he can always tell what kind of mood you're in very easily

so when you're frustrated but too stubborn to admit it, he knows. oh, he knows. and he's patient enough to get you to break and give into him

lets say you two had a petty argument, and now you're giving him the silent treatment. but you haven't seen each other in over a week, and he knows you want him just as much as he wants you. but instead of being the mature 107 year old man he is and trying to talk it out with you, he decides to be a teasing lil shit instead

suddenly your car needs an oil change and bucky is out in the driveway wearing that slutty lil blue henley that makes his eyes look so pretty, and he's got only one of the buttons buttoned, and the sleeves are pushed up to his elbows, and the shirt looks like it's been washed and dried one too many times bc you can see every muscle in his back and shoulders flex when he moves

and then he decides to silently join you in the living room, where you're still ignoring him, and he sits down right across from you and spreads those thick ass thighs in a way that makes your mouth water bc why are his jeans so fucking snug like that and he's just calmly reading a book not making a sound or saying a word with no expression on his face, but internally he's smirking bc he can feel your eyes on him

every room you migrate to, bucky seems to appear in with some reason or excuse, shredding your patience to a paper thin strand that is a breath away from snapping

the stubborn part of you wants to be strong and continue ignoring him but the weak part of you can't even remember why you're upset and does it even matter when he looks like that?

the last straw is when he saunters into the bedroom in nothing but a pair of grey sweatpants that hang dangerously low on his hips, and he drops down to start doing push ups. he's grunting not bc he's straining himself, he's not even breaking a sweat, but bc he knows it'll make you think of him grunting in a different way with those dog tags dangling deliciously from his neck

finally having enough, you slam your book shut and toss it carelessly aside on the bed before stomping over towards him. bucky glances up over his shoulder at you with an expression that was almost innocent, except for that stupid smirk spreading over his mouth. as soon as you're within reach, bucky suddenly turns over onto his back and grabs your leg, tugging you down on top of him with a cocky grin (you know the one)

"now that wasn't so hard, was it? all you had to do was ask, doll."

sam wilson is truly god's strongest soldier bc he puts up with bucky's attitude and ^that??? i'd fold like a lawn chair in a hurricane

[reesespeanutbutterfuck]

(im)perfectionist

vinny hong x jo!reader

jay jo's imperfectionist sister meets the flawful vinny hong.

part 6

part 5 | part 7

part warnings: fem!reader, cursing, jo!reader (jay is reader's 1 year older brother, but they're in the same class), second person's pov (you, you're, your), wb main story SPOILERS

—

Vinny has never looked back twice at a person before. Not at least before you.

Vinny’s eyes have been glued to the resin charm you gave him all afternoon. A cat tomato. A tomato cat. Whatever. Meanwhile, his bespectacled friend, Sung, was already itching to ask about it beside him. He never thought of you after the incident—that’s what you thought. After everything, you expect him to just erase his memory of you? Yeah, you probably thought he doesn't remember you, but oh, he does.

All too well.

He still has so many questions. Why were you in that alley? Were you experienced with fighting like how he concludes? Why were you so mysterious? 

He tries to shrug the thought of you in his head, but he fails. He panned his head slightly at Sung, who was observing him closely from the seat beside him. 

Vinny's face crumpled. “What're you looking at?”

That was Sung’s cue to finally open his mouth and stand up to stand behind him. “You’ve been fidgeting that thing for a while now, where is that even from?” He stood up and knocked on the resin charm with a fingernail from behind Vinny.

Vinny swatted his hand away, enclosed the charm inside his fist, and put it back inside his pocket.

“A girl gave you that.” Sung nodded slowly. It wasn’t a question, it’s a statement. It’s as if he knows.

“Shut up.”

His defensiveness of himself only made Sung chuckle in confirmation, which made the crease on Vinny’s forehead more prominent, as Sung laughs about how he didn’t even bother denying it. 

“I’m right, am I? You’re not one to acquire that for yourself. And you have beef with every man on earth, so only a woman could've given you that. Look at you getting really popular with the ladies. Isn’t Miss-Suturing-Angel, one-rainy-Saturday-night enough? Who gave you that resin charm? Someone important? Do I know her? I’m your friend, tell me! Tell me everything!” Sung's mouth kept yapping, not even giving Vinny a chance to cut in.

If only Sung knew the woman he stupidly dubbed as Suturing Angel was also the one who gave him the charm.

Vinny looked elsewhere. “Speaking of her, still nothing?”

Sung shook his head. “Nah, unfortunately. Just visit her in the hospital and find out. Or just join Minu's new crew and ask him about her yourself.” Suddenly Sung’s smug face in Vinny’s point of view looked too punchable.

“I’ll kill you.” Vinny’s frown crumpled his whole face this time.

“Honestly, based on her personality, sounds like she's sheltered. Model student, eh? I told you to ask Minu. I think she’ll be hard to find.”

“Not so hard.” He thought he wouldn't meet you again, too.

“What?” Sung almost jumped back on his seat when he quickly went back. He was waiting for Vinny to confirm if his interpretation was right.

“We bumped into each other. She got stabbed.” Vinny reclined on his seat, mentioned like it was a normal occurence to get stabbed and to see someone get stabbed on an average Friday night.

“What?!”

“One more what and I’ll bust your jaw, Kwon Sung.”

Sung had to stare into space for a while to process that information. What the actual fuck? “You only told me she knew Minu, but you didn't tell me you met her again! Why? What happened to her? Why was she stabbed? How did it happen?”

“I didn’t see what happened.”

“Is she doing well, though?”

“‘Dunno. You ask her.” Vinny nonchalantly replied.

Sung’s face soured at Vinny refusing to elaborate. Plus, he doesn't even know you personally and he haven't seen you yet, yet he’s worried for you, while this dickhead with his feigned nonchalance says he isn’t! 

“Fucker! Not even man up to check on a girl that you witnessed almost at death’s door, how cruel. That’s why you don’t have a girlfriend!”

“I don’t want one!” Vinny defensively sneered as he thought of smashing the hardbound book on Sung’s face. He really makes Vinny’s blood pressure skyrocket.

“You sure you weren’t only dreaming because of your abstinence and unsuppressable yearn?” Sung tilted his head.

“My what...” Vinny scoffed in irritation while pronouncing the last syllable of his words, and cringed hard, yet he didn’t see any point to even bother further pointing out Sung’s... unsettling choice of words.

“S’not that I’m doubting you, but how do you know you really saw her and it wasn’t a hallucination?”

Vinny rolled his eyes in annoyance and raised the tomato cat resin charm—as if indirectly saying it’s proof of their encounter. Sung’s face looked puzzled for a moment until he realized what his friend meant. He was taken aback as it slowly sunk in. 

“Wow, well played. I’m proud of you.” Sung slow-claps.

“This one’s another.” His hand whipped out another object. Glasses. They were eyeglasses. He clicked his tongue. “That woman doesn’t care about her belongings.”

“Well for one, she just got stabbed for God’s sake. For sure she’s shaken to even double-back for her belongings.”

“That’s the thing. She didn’t look shook, not one bit. She even grabs any chance she has to joke around.”

“In other words, you got bullied by her? You don’t say.” Sung could not contain his laugh anymore, imagining his socially awkward friend being bullied by a girl.

Vinny's tried his best to conceal his embarrassment that was growing even more every second.

“Fuck you.” 

“You know, even if you don’t give a direct answer, you’re too obvious.” Sung bit the insides of his cheek to contain a mischievous grin—this time he really tried to. Vinny might actually put his head on a stick. “But the woman really is something else. I understand why you like her.”

Vinny flung a ballpoint pen at Sung—which he dodged. Sung made his way outside to go to the restroom, his laugh still audible from where Vinny was sitting.

After a moment of silence, Vinny lightly touched the clothed scar he got from when he got stabbed. The one you stitched. For someone who always vanishes, you sure did leave a lot of souvenirs.

When Sung came back from the restroom a while later, he came straight to Vinny again. “So what’s your plan? The glasses were prescription ones and graded. Knew from one look from afar. She's basically blind right now because you took her eyeglasses with you. I’d know.” Sung adjusted his own glasses, imagining the pain of a shit eyesight without glasses.

“I didn’t take it on purpose, fucker. She left it.”

“Whatever. I do hope you see her again, though.”

“Just to return her glasses.”

“Yeah, yeah. Keep telling yourself that.”

___

That was the last time he mentioned you to someone, a week ago. And now you're standing here in front of him, not even fazed of his presence. Your eyes flung to him for a moment, but you immediately looked away like your eyes passed by a blank wall. He knew he'd meet you at some time after your last encounter after you revealed your relationship with Minu and coerced him to join Hummingbird, but now you're really here.

Just what on earth is happening?

***

© reesespeanutbutterfuck 2023, don't forget to support your creators by reblogging !!!

[fellthemarvelous]

The Giggle is a true work of art

It's a love letter to humanity, but everyone has to be willing to listen for it to work.

I love this gif. Think about it. The MCU has a LARGE audience base and Tony Stark is the face of the MCU and is one of the richest men alive. It is no accident that UNIT looks like a tower that was erected by a a white male American narcissist who sacrificed his life to save the entire universe. Love him or hate him, Tony Stark gets your attention. And so does Iron Man. And so do the other Avengers. You know who else has a tower? Batman. (Right?). He's DC. Some people like both. I don't know enough about the DC characters.

And think about RDJ who is trying to step away from the Tony Stark image. It's a character he loved, a character that changed his life after he got out of prison, and he will always love Tony Stark, but he and Tony Stark are not the same person.

https://www.thestreet.com/media/vintage-video-of-robert-downey-jr-visiting-wall-street-resurfaces-goes-viral

Robert Downey Jr told us what was up in the 1990s.

This is meant to connect to the people who love superheroes and superhero movies. To see that Robert Downey Jr is the way he is because he's seen the ugly side of humanity and he has always told us what he really thinks. People look up to him.

This is meant to catch their eye, to say THIS IS WHAT WE ARE DOING. Please listen to our message.

Nerd culture is beautiful art.

And if you don't spend your time asking yourself how often Neil Patrick Harris is bullshitting us because I refuse to believe that he had never heard of Doctor Who before joining the cast. I think he just threw 100% of his "please" attitude into Barney Stinson.

Remember when Neil Patrick Harris played Doogie Howser, MD? The 14 year old Doctor?

Oh, he was a Doctor too! So let's not forget this other cult classic Doctor character he played. If you haven't seen Doctor Horrible and His Sing-along Blog you are missing out.

He was once listed as one of Times' 100 Most Influential People in 2010.

He's charismatic and is openly affectionate with his husband and their children.

Love him or hate him, he has a large fanbase. And he is an AMAZING actor. And a really good magician too.

And they used his skills as a magician on Doctor Who, took us to Soho in 1925, and the Good Omens fandom arose from our slumber severe hyperfixation and meticulous meta analysis to dig into a fandom where David Tennant is the most popular incarnation of a particular character, so we are already doing nonstop detective work.

The Good Omens fandom LOVES David Tennant. He is our favorite rebellious demon.

He played the MCU's most terrifying villain (there is not one single MCU villain that has ever terrified me as much as Kilgrave because that fucker uses his powers of mind control to force Jessica Jones into being in a relationship with him...among other things). As a character though, he was fucking fascinating despite the fact we have met so many men who act just like him, and we hate all of them.

Side note: When I typed "Doogie Howzer" into the gif search, this is the most popular image that came up. I consistently get Howser and Howzer confused.

Now I've got the attention of the Star Wars fandom! Howzer rocks.

You know who else appeared on a Star Wars show (again) this year?

This entire episode was crafted in a way that it formed as many connections as it could with other fandoms.

And not just that. It made sure to include as much representation as possible. Was it perfect? No, but the point is that Doctor Who is telling the world that it is moving on. It is ready to grow and it is ready to be a mainstream voice for everyone whose existence is being threatened by unjust laws.

The new Doctor defied expectations. This Doctor is a breath of fresh air, and a reminder that we will all be okay, but change is inevitable and this sci-fi show about an alien who is either 2,000 or 4,000,000,005 years old. I can't keep up anymore. It doesn't matter because he's a Doctor free from the confines of societal expectations.

Nerd culture is vast, and I know I've left out fandoms because I don't really have all day nor do I know all the fandoms, so I'm just giving you a taste of what I do love.

This episode is meant to be for everyone who needs a place to call home.

And the old Doctor finally gets to retire to make way for the new Doctor.

And as a reward for longtime fans, the retired Doctor has found a place to call home on Earth with his best friend. David Tennant will always be Doctor Who because the old Doctor was allowed to live.

And for the Staged fandom, you know what that means, Michael?

[circusmania]

SIN Chapter 6

⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘ Notes: Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 7 Chapter 8 Chapter 9 Chapter 10 Chapter 11

⚠️ TW: Religion (Christianity) and manipulation at its finest ⚠️

♡

���⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘

I'm always going to be there,

Even if you don't want me to be.

That night was more so a blur, although I remember crying in Marcus's arms. I remember him softly brushing my hair as my tears poured down. Oh… Judy, Judy, Judy.

Saying your name sounds so foreign.

Going back to school was hard without her. I kept expecting her to run up to me or for me to wake up, but… I never did. All the promises we had made over the years still roll around in my head. Her voice keeps repeating itself over and over.

Omar's hand draped over my shoulder. We were all still grieving… Vanessa was sitting at my side as well. “Have they started planning her funeral yet?” Vanessa asked as she dabbed a napkin on her lower eyelid. “Don't know… I think her parents are making it a private funeral.” Omar replied.

“Oh… I see.” Vanessa's voice wavered. I couldn't blame her, I would've wanted to attend her funeral as well. However, I don't know if I could keep my tears from spilling if I see her again.

It hasn't been a long time since Judy's death, but the talks seem to have died down. Everyone has forgotten about her. No more staring or whispering when I walk through the halls. It all must seem like yesterday's news to them.

“How could they have forgotten her so easily?” I retorted.

“Must be all the disappearance that's been happening. People have learned to move on quickly.” Omar whispered, his hand still on my shoulder.

“Disappearances?” I stop.

How come I haven't heard of any disappearances? I swear I check the news daily, it couldn't have gone over my head.

“Yeah, disappearances. I think there's been 9 in total, and the police have been undergoing numerous investigations. Must be why they dismissed Judy's case so easily.” Vanessa slumped. Her eyes stayed on her used, crumpled napkin.

“But that's not right! Judy was pressured by the fucker who sent out that video!!” “It was a suicide, that's all they needed to know.” Omar sighed.

“Why are you two dismissing this so easily!? Don't you care about Judy?! Don't you want to know who took that video!?” I stood up abruptly.

Omar's hand slipped off my shoulder, and he and Vanessa exchanged a sorrowful look.

I can't believe them.

“We do care… it's just…”

“Just WHAT Omar!? Vanessa, Judy was your friend!”

Vanessa stayed quiet. She rubbed her arm and avoided eye contact.

“I think you should go out for a breath of fresh air.”

“What!? No! I'm letting this go, I-”

“Please…”

Why did Vanessa remind me so much of Judy?

I sighed and complied.

“Okay…”

I took my bag and walked off. Even if I had my back turned, I could still feel their burning stares from behind.

₊˚⊹♡ 🚶🚶‍♂️🚶‍♀️♡⊹˚₊

Maybe this is what I needed. I enjoy walking around town and seeing other people live their lives. They seem all so peaceful… It's crazy to think about the fact that there might be a killer on the loose that's causing all those disappearances. It could just as easily be a wild animal… maybe both.

I wonder why it hasn't been broadcasted on the news.

A sudden yell made me snap out of my thoughts. Not far from where I was heading was a man dressed in a white robe in front of a church. The local church was located far from the school and the park I came from. I must've been walking for some while now.

“Repent! Repent! The Lord is coming! He sees your sorrows! He sees all! Repent!”

What a nut job.

I walked closer, it seemed he was passing out Bibles and pamphlets. I walked close enough to catch his attention because in a moment his whole body turned towards me.

“Young man! Oh! The Lord has seen your cries! He listens and watches! Repent, and he'll save you from the claws of Satan!”

Alright, this man was good.

“Alright… uh… is there a sign-up sheet or-”

That made him chuckle.

“No, no son. Every Sunday come to our church, in fact, come whenever you please. Open your heart to God, and he'll save you from whatever grief and pain consumes you.”

He passed me a Bible and a pamphlet.

“Will do… uhm, my name is-”

“I know what your name is, son. The Lord has spoken to me through a dream, he told me to guide you and let you see the light.”

“Uh-huh…”

“My name is Father Pierre. If you have any questions, please, come see me.”

And with that, he turned and went back to yelling in the streets. I put the Bible in my bag and opened the pamphlet.

As I was walking back to Omar and Vanessa, reading through the pamphlet put my mind at ease.

A God who hears my cries and pleases.

A God who'll listen and save me.

I am in need of saving.

“Omar, Vanessa? I'm back.” They turned towards me with a small smile.

“Oh? Back so soon?” Vanessa smiled before noticing the pamphlet.

“What's that?” Omar shot me a glance.

“Oh, I've decided to join the church... or something. I think it'll be good for me to believe in something... have a little hope, you know?”

Vanessa and Omar looked as if they wanted to say something, but they were interrupted by a low voice speaking from behind me.

“You joined the church…?”

I turned around, and of course, it was Marcus.

“Oh, Marcus. Yeah, I have.”

Vanessa and Omar squirmed behind me, I could hear them whispering and imagine them sparing glancing between themselves and between Marcus and me.

“Christians are liars. They manipulate believers into thinking they're worshipping a God. But in reality…” He leaned in closer. “You're just worshipping them.”

“Uhm… like I said… I'm just giving it a shot.”

“You always just give it a shot,” Vanessa mumbled.

“What's that supposed-”

“Point is… I don't think it's good for you to put off all your problems on some God.” Omar interrupted.

“I'll be the judge of that.”

It was silent for a bit before Marcus spoke up.

“Who gave you these?”

I looked back at Marcus, and he was holding the pamphlet and the bible.

“How did you- … erm… It was Father Pierre… I think that's what his name was...”

Marcus, Vanessa, and Omar's faces shifted.

“I heard that he's crazy… people are conspiring that he's the one responsible for all the disappearances,” Vanessa said.

“What-”

“Not only that… he's known for being rather… touchy,” Omar added.

“How would you-”

“Not to mention, he has a past of perjury…” Marcus smiled.

“Stop it! It's my choice to make, not yours! Not too long ago, you two were so dismissive of Judy's death. Well, you two can grieve in whatever way you want! Just let me grieve my way.”

“It's not that… it's the church we have a problem with.” Vanessa advanced towards me with her hand on her chest.

Omar's eyebrows scrunched up, turning his face into a frown. He walked over to me before putting his arm around my shoulder. He turned us around and began walking away.

“Why don't you just sleep on it? It's been hard for you… well, all of us… People tend to go overboard when trying to crawl their way out of a ditch.”

“I know, Omar… but, nothing is set in stone yet. It's good to try new things.”

I stopped and so did Omar. He sighed before taking my hand in his; his thumb caressed my hand gently.

He leaned in and hugged me.

“Just be careful, okay? So many things are going on and… I'd hate for you to make a decision you'd wind up regretting later on.”

“Don't worry Omar. I'll be fine.”

“I hope so.”

He gave me one last smile before he left to go back to Vanessa.

I turned around, and my heart almost jumped out of my chest. Right across the street stood the church with Father Pierre out front. He wasn't wearing his white robe… more like a traditional priest robe. He waved at me, and I couldn't help but wave back.

He had such a gentle demeanour that I couldn't resist.

However, one thought throbbed in the back of my mind.

That church…

It moved.

⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘ Want to read ahead? Click here!

[vinxwatches]

watching good omen season 1

ep 1 pilot

haven't seen a lot of it, mostly that people like it, that it's made by people people really like and that it's gay (or at least people make it gay) so you know, good pick for me. and i just watched to animations/animatics on youtube with bad endings and bad endings fuck me up, so hopefully this is happier. intro is a fucking banger. also god has a fem voice? nice. accurate skin colour for the earliest humans. not surprised, but appreciated. making fun of theology and great banter? i love it.

ominous picnic basket. oh... actually quite biblically fitting it seems. i REALLY hope they don't expect me to remember these names too well. many of the characters seem fun though.

of course the american politician says bs like "a regular y chromosome son". which i'm sure has not been tested as you 1: don't know the gender yet. 2: phenotype does not denote genotype.

i wonder who and how they'll figure out who has the wrong baby. "i don't recall what horror of history we had a lunch over, but i do recall what we had." the BEST dynamic.

will they even figure out they got the wrong one? ok, i know that working with an actual 5 year old would be a nightmare... but that kid is like 12.

well done making both heaven and hell look like shit. do you want grime overpopulating or empty, liminal, office spaces?

brilliant end of episode 1.

ep 2 the book

damn the forces of hell are so bloody rude and evil. and so many quick jokes.

question: what are the 4 horsemen of the apocalypse supposed to be in christianity? both biblically and in modern belief? they are separate from devils and angels.

i love a witch that also uses an ipad in her rituals.

"sorry, right number" seriously the humour in this show is so brilliant. i really hope the story is able to match it.

ep 3 hard times

a black knight shrugging is way too funny. i love these two. just two old friends helping each other out, it's just that that's diametrically opposing one another. the angel doing some tempting, the demon some miracles. and upper management doesn't care.

awh, they are just so cute together.

excuse me you are playing intro now? 28 minutes in? that's not an intro. that's a bloody intermission!

they really succeed at making heaving seem so extremely bad. extremely wide shot or extreme close-up. it's so incredibly uncomfortable.

the prime minister has a nice flat chested fucker in his bed.... good for him if he's not cheating.

"mend it all"/"end it all" whispers. really neat.

ep 4 saturday morning funtime

of course he was condemned for nothing more then asking questions.

ah, they got rid of pestilence to replace them with pollution. it's a good change, but feels pretty pre 2020.

oh no, i find his death so sad. he had a love, why kill him? i know the apocalypse is coming but still.

i still really hope that the presidents son turns out to be trans to just break the things he said at the start. then again it wouldn't really work as it's not the kids he said it about. idk, i guess i hope of screen son turns out to be trans to spite the person that'll never know... yea i'm holding out hope for something that doesn't matter.

azi being send to heaving is SO bad. his bookshop possibly burning down is emotionally worse. it was going to be the last episode of the day. but i started watching because i couldn't deal with bad endings, so i guess i'll have to watch one more.

ep 5 the doomsday option

Azi going full rogue (finally).

man that's the most obvious cold reading ever.

the guard reads a neil gaymen book. cute.

sir... your car is... more then a little on fire.

ep 6 the very last day of the rest of their lives

are we doing a flash back episode for the last episode of the season?

oh, please let him rebuild the car just like i want the bookshop rebuild?

the way to defeat the end of the world is to believe and stand (and i hope work) for a world that wouldn't end. a bit on the nose but very nice.

and of course with Terry Pratched being involved death is not to be defeated, just not hastened along.

a kid not doing the one thing they were supposed to do.... there's a trans/gay message in there. also That's Just What Kids Do! you wanted an 11 year old to do what they were told? that's the first part of the problem.

for a TV series that's a pretty good satan. oh that is SO clever. kind of time fucking, but not really so long as you never introduce time travel so it's only true from now on. oh, is it a nicer ending then i though? YES IT IS! \o/

it "ends" as it starts: with a garden and an apple. ok, make it more explicit why don't you.

oh, you subtle bastards. i love it. other scene's now make more sense too, oh how i love it.

ok, yea it makes sense people go wild over this as it's really bloody great.

[moreclaypigeons]

Lorem Lore Masterpost (The Infinite Dungeon)

Maybe you've heard of Lorem Ipsum. Or maybe you haven't. Either way, she's heard of you. Probably. Or will at least pretend she has.

So, what's her deal?

A while ago I was struck with the perfect character name- lorem ipsum. It's the pseudo-latin filler text everyone uses in design. How fucking funny would that be? I set the name aside for a while and decided next time I got to play DnD i'd use it.

And then that day came along. @siriwesen announced they were looking for players for a mini campaign, called The Dungeon. They said they would put our characters through hell. Yippee!! The perfect opportunity for my silly guy.

Lorem is a 22 year old human sorcerer. From afar, you wouldn't expect much from her, just your typical adventurer. But there is more to her than it seems! Up close, you could see a faint opalescent shimmer on her skin, the result of spending her formative years traveling between the outer planes. She never really had one place she called home, as she was always on the move, but the closest thing she had was Elysium. That was where she had felt safest, among celestials, phoenixes, and moon dogs alike. As she grew up, the magic of the outer planes imbued her with power, which aside from her powerful spellcasting, can be seen in the shimmer of her skin or the glow of her eyes as she wields that magic.

[ art by @siriwesen ]

Being a messenger between planes was great and all, but she felt lonely and out of touch with her roots. In an attempt to reconnect with her past, she returned to the prime material plane with only the clothes on her back and her trusty messenger bag (which actually carries a lot, to be honest!).

However, things didn't exactly go to plan. She was only there a few days before... well... she can't quite remember what happened.

She wakes up in a cell, in a dungeon. She notices the walls are well lit, despite a lack of any light source. Fucking weird but not the worst she's been in. She takes her ring of miscellaneous keys and opens the cell door. As she walks down the hallway, she's greeted by one of these fuckers. Some bug skull thing. Ick.

[ art by @siriwesen ]

She tried to attack it with sacred flame, no success. Then, from the hallway, she hears footsteps as a pale human man makes his way down, quite afraid. She says fuck it and casts firebolt, which fuck- did not work on that bug. Barely missed the man. He flips her off before running down the hall.

Lorem quickly discovers they are not alone, as she takes out the bug with a spear, then discovers that the hallways lead to other cells. Altogether, there are four people in the dungeon. And the bugs remain defeated. As they try to figure out what the shit is happening, they discover another cell, which is empty, and a paper which alluded to an "author" visiting the realm for inspiration.

The group discovers a staircase, and as they climb them, a white fog clouds their vision, and they find themselves in a different room, with 4 of the bugs waiting for them. They do some badass shit and take them out, with minor hiccups. Lorem aligns with two of the bugs and shoots her firebolt through them, searing them both at one instant.

As those bugs lie dead, the team notices a pile of bones nearby. Recognizing it from the previous floor, they decide they should figure out if it would also turn into a bug.

[ art by @amberflatwoods ]

Which... yeah may not have been the best idea. Youch!

Quail boy did a bit of a dumb but it ended up being alright with a heal from the half-elf. Meanwhile, blondie engages in combat and then runs away, which *dm voice* you're going to provoke an opportunity attack! And he's pretty injured. Lorem casts aura of vitality to give him a heal, and they take down the bug.

But blondie decides that he hasn't had enough yet, and investigates the pile of bricks, which, fuck. is a mimic, hungry for blood. Stabbing it kind of helps, and then the half-elf bard casts thunderwave on it, which Lorem saved for. But, fuck. The other guy is still in range. He's low on health.

[ art by @lexarga ]

He does some more attacking, and.. well.. yet again tries to run. Some people never learn... in an opportunity attack, the mimic mauls him.

Lorem sees this stranger across from her as he bleeds out. She shouts out in protest, watching the pile of bricks descend upon him.

[ art by @amberflatwoods ]

And then everything goes white.

And she's back in her cell again.

Anyways, antics carry out from here. In the second cycle, they finally introduce themselves to each other.

The human(?) rogue is Damien [ played by @abstractbabble ]. The half-elf bard who healed Lorem is Lyr [ played by @lexarga ]. And the avian halfling who shot her in the arm (which healed. only physically...) is named Guthrie [ played by @amberflatwoods ].

They do some more digging, and discover: 1. a few bottles filled with liquor, 2. a rope hanging from the ceiling in the empty cell, which leads up to the second floor.

The second Lorem sees those bottles, she goes, "MOLOTOV COCKTAIL!"

Together, the gang devises a plan, where Damien will climb the rope and cast minor illusion to distract the bugs, and Guthrie will launch the bottle at them as they gather in one spot

[ animation by @amberflatwoods ]

And it's pretty successful... I mean they don't die immediately, but a little fire never hurt. Lorem immediately adds fire to fire, killing the big guy with sacred flame, and shooting another with firebolt. Which, well. Shit. Sets the table on fire. No big.

And here is when we learned Lorem is a fan of arson. My fault, really, for giving her two fire-related spells.

[ art by @siriwesen ]

They do some puzzle shit, get to the next floor, and discover they are on floating platforms in a void that extend repeating infinitely outward. The usual. After some investigating and physics testing (he threw a candle over the gap and it was fine!!!) Damien makes a running jump for it, but he kind of slows down in the air, like he's moving through jello, and Lorem sees as he misses the ledge and plummets downward.

And then everything goes white.

Third time's the charm?

[ art by @amberflatwoods ]

The second floor is tougher this time around. The damn bugs keep respawning. But they have nothing on Lorem, she takes no hits.

Meanwhile, Damien is being crushed by a cabinet and they realize the items don't restock each cycle. After defeating the enemies for realsies, the four of them sit around a table and rest with some wine.

They talk about whether they'd reunite after they escape, and Lorem assures them she'd be able to find them. One way or another. Guthrie gives her a feather just in case. She says, "my dog will find you," which sounds threatening but moon dogs are not scary.

This time they successfully make it past the third floor, through a series of bridge-forming puzzles. There's a fifth platform set that seems to activate on its own, but uhhhh let's just ignore that for now guys.

They end up in a village, which is pretty obviously fake. There are characters all around it (!!! other people !!!!) but after approaching them all, they discover they are NPCs. WHEN WILL IT END?

Lorem tries to exploit the infinite fish glitch, which doesn't work. Whatever, lame. They head to the next floor.

CUE BOSS BATTLE MUSIC

They find themselves in an enclosed rundown castle, with an atrium. Floating above a tree is a GIANT monster bug skull. Holy shit. Fear for my life. Lorem finds out fire doesnt work on it (RUDE), needs a heal from Lyr, and Damien rushes up the stairs.

Where he is.. promptly killed by taking one hit after the other. Yikes dude

You know the drill.

The next time they reach that floor, they're smarter about it. They have a lot more HP, and do more heals. Guthrie hides behind the left staircase, while Damien goes up it. Lorem leads Lyr up the right staircase, as Lyr casts vicious mockery. Cornered between two skull bugs, Lorem casts spirit guardians, and a swarm of winged spirits in shifting colors swirl around her. They completely desecrate the bugs.

Lyr moves forward, and the spirits part like the curtain of a waterfall as she makes her way closer to the enemy. As Lorem follows, taking cover beside a tree, the spirits follow her in a 15 foot radius, but they're moving slower.

Through the spirits, Lorem sees as Damien approaches the giant from behind. As he casts color spray, a paint-like substance splatters everywhere in the direction of the bug, and from his balm glows a brilliant a blinding light.

[ art by @siriwesen ]

As the light dims, in the spot where Damien once stood, is a giant white figure. It's long, and cylindrical, and has 6 legs. And it is staring down at the bug with an eyeless grin.

[ art by @amberflatwoods ]

Aaaand that's where we last left off a few days ago. Pretty exciting!

I love this campaign so much and I love our little adventuring crew and all the Situations (tm) they get themselves into.

[nautilusopus]

20 questions for fic writers

Tagged by @subdee, may as well since it's been a while

1. How many works do you have on ao3?

40

2. What’s your total ao3 word count?

590,973

3. What fandoms do you write for?

FFVII mostly, but none of that spinoff bullshit. I have some stuff for XV in the works despite hating XV and the characters having zero fucking personality because this is just my grieving process I guess??? They're basically all crossovers with VII except one though so ¯_(ツ)_/¯

I've also got a couple things for Spy X Family I'm excited for but unfortunately am a bit hamstrung due to certain reveals and lack of reveals so it's on pause.

(Also Ever Crisis and Remake back to back have sucked all the fucking joy out of me in one fell swoop so I'm trying to remember why I even fucking like doing this when FFVII has effectively been erased.)

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

1)The Number I.

Go read it. I worked hard on it and it's very dense and heavily character-driven and a genfic focused on plot, and, most importantly, is complete. I'm going to shill this one directly I ain't give a damn:

Predominately involves Cloud, now four years out from Meteorfall, struggling to adjust to civilian life given he's still gene-spliced with an Old God, who begins losing control of his body to a heretofore seemingly unknown entity with inscrutable goals. As it gradually becomes clear that the events of the previous four years aren't as they seem in more ways than one, things start to go off the rails completely as Cloud winds up enmeshed in conflict between multiple parties: an international initiative studying cosmology and the two doctors leading it; the WRO, who has considered him a Jenova-based liability from day one; interpersonal friction with his newfound family stemming from the residual baggage of everything he went through; and reality itself beginning to deteriorate.

It's slice of life, it's cosmic horror, it's a character study, it's about grown men crying and legacies and grief and trauma and intimacy and autonomy and gender as a microcosm for broader truths about the nature of the self, it's got angry tearful fistfights, bottoms that haven't figured out you can take it in turn to service top, Cloud telling everyone his strong and correct opinions about magic and materia and bikes, found family shenanigans, and me talking about garlic for way way way too long. Something for everyone!

I wasn't kidding about any of that by the way, heed the warnings at the top of the chapters because I do NOT pull punches and we get into some heavy shit. Go hard or go home.

Originally it was a 500 word pee joke I was gonna show to two people in response to a terrible LTD argument I saw someone make and was sure I'd "wrap it up quickly". Oops.

2) An Idiot's Guide to Holding Hands. I wrote this in response to, I'm not kidding, the worst most hateful fanfiction I have ever fucking seen in my life. As big of a beef as I have with the Crisis Core fuckers treating the women like shit and being pretty hateful towards them as a whole, they're still at least clearly writing because they genuinely love Crisis Core and the characters in it for reasons that are presently unknown to me. This thing on the other hand was oozing contempt for the cast of VII and Evangelion and the women in particular and I genuinely don't know why someone would put that much fucking effort into making something like this and felt a sudden need to rebut everything it stood for. It's not super great as a fic tbh but y'all seem to like it so at least something came of it.

3) Don't Ask How The Job Interview Went. Harry Potter/VII crossover I shat out in like 6 hours on a whim because a Halloween prompt one year was "witches and wizards" and I hated all the existing crossovers (ugh again with the crisis core). Honestly had an entire multichapter fic as a sequel lined up that I was pretty excited for but as things went on I felt grosser and grosser about even making it. Maybe I'll do something with the outline one day, it was basically finished. Still kills me that this thing is so fucking popular but there you go.

4) What's Dead and Buried. This is literally just Chapter 18 of The Number I (which you should go read!). I wrote it, realised it worked great as a standalone fic and gateway drug, and published it as its own thing. If you're on the fence about TNI, maybe check out this oneshot. Features shitty gremlin child Cloud interacting with Vincent and a lot of grim implications about both their lives that Cloud is too young to really get. Very very black comedy.

5) Adjacent. I don't like this one sorry. It was a commission and while I like the individual headcanons of freaky shit Cloud is inclined to do and was chomping at the bit to use them somewhere I don't like how they wound up getting utilised. Feels like generic fandom fluff to me. I'd delete it but people seem to enjoy it and I don't want to take that from them.

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Always and as soon as I possibly can! I'm immensely flattered people actually take the time to comment on stuff and I enjoy getting to talk about the stuff I wrote in a bit more depth.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

It's Full of Stars easily. Fucked that dude up beyond repair. Also was considering a sequel for this one too so I could explore some of the stuff fueling what the fuck is going on here, though that might obviously ruin the ambiguity of said ending and what exactly was done to him.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

I'm a big baby I actually almost always try for happy endings, or at least bittersweet. Probably Tidewaters, nobody even gets pulped in that one.

8. Do you get hate on fic?

Basically no. I've gotten five negative comments in all the years I've been doing this:

Two were people whinging about how I made Aeris Jewish in a fic and how that was reverse racist against Christians (die mad about it lol).

Two were someone that wanted an in-depth essay over my right to use a slur within the context of a character talking about people calling him that slur in a character arc partially about feeling alienated from gender and basically demanded I out myself to "prove" I could use it while missing literally everything about why that word would be used to where they felt the need to send that shit to begin with (gee thanks did you do it did you make the queers feel comfortable). Reading comprehension is so so important you are all going to kill me.

The last one was a long six paragraph rant completely unrelated to the fic in any way because I joked in the author's notes about not liking a video game that they liked(????), followed by an even longer ten paragraph rant about how actually the unrelated game was "95% perfect" (lmaoooo) and how "5% of it being bad isn't a good reason to hate it". The first half of it's on there, I deleted the second comment because my fanfiction comments are not the fucking gamefaqs forums dude. (Also die mad about it lol.) That remains to this day the only comment I've ever deleted from any of my fics and that includes the one that literally just said "penis" and nothing else.

9. Do you write smut?

If you squint lol. TNI has a couple sex scenes in it. They're uh

they're in it.

Boy are they in it.

10. Do you write crossovers?

Hell yeah I do. Also I'm a purist about this term A CROSSOVER IS WHEN YOU CROSS THE TWO THINGS OVER BUT THEY ARE STILL THEIR OWN DISPARATE THINGS. A FUSION IS WHEN THE TWO SETTINGS ARE FUSED. WORDS MEAN THINGS. ALSO A DRABBLE IS 100 WORDS EXACTLY NO MORE NO LESS. I'LL KEEP SITTING ON THIS PORCH SHAKING MY FIST AT THESE CHILDREN UNTIL THEY FUCKING LEARN.

Anyway I'll dump FFVII on everything and nobody can stop me. FFXV. Mass Effect. Spy X Family. Aliens. Ellen Ripley can, should, must, and will fight Jenova with a power loader.   

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Nah I talk a big game but I ignore the Comp too hard to break into the mainstream. I'm small potatoes.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Nah and no surprises why. Shit's too wordy.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Kiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiind of? Fuck I gotta finish that thing.

14. What’s your all-time favourite ship?

meh. Does Loid/Yor even count? Everyone keeps writing it wrong and we still haven't seen the penny drop but it's sweet in its extremely fucking dysfunctional way (which is the best way GO READ TNI COUGH COUGH).

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but probably won’t?

Frame-Perfect. Should not have started writing before finishing the damn outline, don't know how to resolve this thing without it being a massive downer any way you slice it. This is why you should never pants VARETH.

16. What are your writing strengths?

Dialogue babyyyyyyy. I literally won an award for it once lol. Probably also psychological horror. Those two things combined means there's a lot of stream of consciousness shit in nearly everything I do, and if that's not your jam you probably won't like it.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

It is so, so hard to get a character from a location to another location. It shouldn't be hard. Why is it hard??? I should be allowed to just go And then he went, in exactly that cadence every time and everyone should just deal with it UGH 

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

Extremely hit or miss and you can almost always tell if the person in question doesn't speak it. Use sparingly because you are playing with fire.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

FFVII. The Number I is technically my first fanfiction ever, actually!

20. Favourite fic you’ve written?

Either TNI obviously, but also as a whole either Replacements or Tidewaters. Replacements I whipped up on the spot day-of in a few hours on a whim and it basically turned out perfect???? I've never been able to replicate that before or since. Tidewaters is Cloud Yuffie Nanaki shenanigans which I love, and I was shocked and horrified to learn I'm basically the entire tag of that as far as that's concerned (I'm working on rectifying that I promise shhhh).

Everyone I know that writes was already tagged basically uhhhhhhh

@varethinsilico, @denebolaleo-ffwriter, @spectroscopes, @terror-billie, @jenovacomplete, anyone else who wants to take a crack at this pretend I tagged you.

[warlordess]

Ooooh mind telling us about the stobin paranoia one? Or the country club meet cute?

Oh gawd, oh gawd; my dumbass critical anxiety (on top of being exhausted after working 32 hours in two days; tbh it's mostly that second thing) kept me from answering this until now.

I do want to remind whoever, including OP, that I don't really have anything more than bare bones synopses for any of the ideas I mentioned. Also, i haven't talked up a thing I've created in so long that I don't know if I remember how.

That being said, another Steddie acquaintance, @ataliagold (go read their Steddie things maybe?? They're very good, gimme just the right amount of yummy whump) asked me about both of these in PMs so I have shared a little bit about each and they liked both concepts a lot, which gave me some courage.

So, anyway, as for the Stobin paranoia fic, which I've wondered if perhaps "paranoia" is too strong a word but eeeh... Basically, it takes place right after Starcourt (maybe like the week following or so). It's pretty well-established that Steve and Robin were still at least a bit high and hopped up on truth serum during The Bathroom Talk, not to mention the memory blurring is probably even more effed up by Steve's 74th concussion in three years (lol... sorta), so Steve gets it in his head that he somehow forced Robin to come out to him and, knowing how important safety is for a hidden queer person, especially in a place like Hawkins, he starts spiraling and isolating from her. He doesn't deserve to have his person if he has to manipulate them into divulging their secrets to him after all, she's far better off without the resident douchenozzle, Steve Harrington, invading her space and privacy and having any intimate (platonic) expectations of their relationship. While he's all in his own head about that, Robin starts coming around to check on him, only to realize she's being ignored. This causes her to eventually start spiraling too - of course the great King Steve couldn't handle being friends with a fucking dyke, of course he would snub her after the smoke and fog cleared and he remembered that she'd spurned his advances, what a load of crock, she should have known better - thus their newly formed super bond starts having holes drilled into it... Anyway, the fic is about that whole misunderstanding and them trying to work through it. I just love that kinda trope 'cause I'm the worst.

As for the Steddie country club meet-cute, it starts off similarly to a couple other fics I've read here Eddie is forced to go straight (financially only) after Reefer Rick is arrested and his supply dries up and the cops have hounded him and Wayne enough times and etc. He ends up employed at the semi-local country club predominantly as a caddy. Decent pay, some tips even, enough downtime while standing on the sidelines and aimlessly following his current client around that he can think up some future campaign ideas... and, early on, another perk introduced is his good-looking apparent coworker (who he unfortunately crosses paths with while coworker is being reamed by one of the more infamous club members). He and Steve pass each other a few more times and begin engaging, closing some distance until it's unfortunately revealed that Steve is NOT his coworker and is in fact closely related to the rich fucker that was seen yelling at him on day one. He had a good excuse for being in uniform that first time but has obviously decided to lie in order to fuck with Eddie every day since.

Well, anyway, those are the general premises of those particular fics. I feel like I gave too much away but also like I didn't really say anything at all. Lol.

[logically-asexual]

OKAY IT HAPPENED

i saw a spoiler that i SHOULD NOT have seen. but its a funny story so im going to scream about it under the read more and once im done im going to go pirate those 7 episodes i have left even if i have to watch them in french im losing my absolute mind.

dont click on this if you havent finished the show dont make my mistake aksjdhasjdh

SO i keep acting without thought and snooping some miraculous posts that appear under the recommended thing that sometimes shows below my own posts. and a while ago i saw a post that said something about gabriel not being technically adrien's father and i thought that was stupid and i chose not to believe that as a spoiler. also because i had just read a fanfic posterd years ago that decided emilie had been a villain who cheated on gabriel and that's how she had adrien and i just do not like the idea of emilie having been secretely a bad person. and i just didn't like the idea of adrien having some other father. but it wouldn't leave my mind. the only thought i had was that maybe felix and adrien shared the same father and it was the guy who died? but i didn't care much for that.

THEN i watched the episodes i posted live reactions to these past days, which include these two episodes where we finally learn felix's intentions with the peacock miraculous. and okay. i got it when he said the thing to kagami about having a responsibility towards the "beings you create" i got that it was a thing about "our parents shouldn't control us". i just found it cute and interesting and it hasn't left myh mind because i really didn't expect to see this soft side of felix ever.

I ALSO haven't been able to stop thinking about WHAT the hell did Emilie want with the peacock miraculous. because again, i don't want her to be evil. i want her to have mysterious secrets, yes, but i want to know what non evil purpose she could have with the miraculous.

so THIS VERY MORNING. A FEW hours ago my mind randomly put these three dots together while i was having breakfast and watching QuintonReviews talk about crazy theories for nickelodeon sitcoms and said "WHAT IF.... Emilie couldn't have children for some reason and adrien is a sentimonster?"

and i thought.. haha... that's INSANE. im going to remember i had this thought because its SO silly and i want to laugh about it when i have finished the show and have all my answers... how funny LOL.

and just. forgot about it. until A COUPLE MINUTES AGO I ONCE AGAIN GO SNOOPING. and i skim over a post that's like "marinette in season 1: juggles babysitting, being ladybug, idk what else, felix in season 4" and mi think its alright to read this because it said SEASON 4. but then it said that he finds that adrien and him are actually not kasjdh i dont know how they phrased it because i ran away as fast as i could but nowmy WORLD is crashing donw.

because . i did think it was silly. but now EVERYTHING makes sense????? when adrien was going to kiss marinette and he hear gabriels voice in his head saying no and he stopped and i thought he definitely had dont something to him but then maybe it was just a way to represent how adrien's mind works under the abuse of his father but no that wasn't it.. it was GABRIEL FUCKING CONTROLLING ADRIEN BECAUSE HES A SENTIMONSTER IKM ADKFJASHKDJHASKJFHASDKJFHKJFHKASHGFLasd

im losing my mind

is Kagami one too?????? do they control them with their rings?????

so i told my friend that i would wait for her to watch up to episode 20 like i just did before w both together would find the last episodes online and watch them but no. IM watching those fuckers right now because every minute that passes is another minute im pacing around the room and having these revelations in the style of Rapunzel when she figured out that she was the lost princess and she just crashes into a mirror adn breaks it with the force of her shock. im like that. i needthe episodes to tell me this stuff i can't keep going like this.

WHAT THE FUCK GYUS

[the-blind-assassin-12]

A message from modern Oberyn? 🤣🫐

Omg Jules I have been laughing to myself about this since you sent it and I think it's time to let everyone else have a chuckle, don't you?

(read: I'm sorry it took me four score and seven years to answer this.)

He would absolutely send this text. From the other side of the couch while you're sitting right there with him, probably. It might even be his way to initiate make up sex if you're annoyed with him for whatever reason. (Looking better than me in yellow and not being more aware of his surroundings when taunting his victims are literally his only crimes though so I have no idea what he could possibly do to need to initiate make up sex because the man is perfection on legs.) But I digress.

So you get this text from Oberyn. And you can feel his eyes on you while you're opening it and reading it. You can feel his smirk and the arch of his eyebrow and the little purse of his lips so you already know what you're gonna see when you look over at him (and you like it, duh.) But you *try* to stay annoyed or unaffected because gods (old and new of course) damn it, you can't just let him win every time simply because he's perfect! (Yes you can and you know this. The acting unaffected is fun for you. And for him.)

You look over at him and you raise your own eyebrow and give him your own little lip quirk and say "I didn't get a picture" with a shrug because you didn't get a picture. He didn't send it. Yet.

The man just tilts his head and puts on a faux-confused pout, looks down at his phone and says "No? Hmm..." And then your phone dings again and there it is. THERE IT ALL IS. Your façade doesn't shatter it implodes and you can't even try to keep it together and all that perfect bastard says is "How about now?"

It takes you like 12 seconds just to remember how to breathe (which obviously you've been doing your whole life and it's quite rude/sexy of him to make you forget how so often) even though there's nothing in the photo you haven't seen with your own eyes (and hands and mouth, too, I mean let's face it). But when you do remember how to supply your brain with oxygen it comes up with the best response.

You just look at him and silently get up and start walking to the bedroom and then you look back over your shoulder to where he's still lounging on the couch with a grin like a cat who got the cream, you just say "Lest..." and then you take off your shirt and toss it at him and BY GODS (Again the old the new the drowned ones, all of those fuckers) he is up and after you in nothing flat.

And this is just a regular Wednesday night occurrence. Don't even get me started on the weekends. (or do)

Thank you so much for sending this and brightening my day and my thoughts by dropping Oberyn into them. I hope you're laughing as much as I am over this scenario!! <3

[wordiestwyrm]

[cracks knuckles] OKAY FUCKERS INTENSELY PERSONAL POST TIME i need to rant about this hence you all SUFFER. it's about my parents so you've been warned

so my dad doesn't love my mum, not romantically, at least. he's gay, you see. she knows he's gay (well, she knows he's bi, almost there) but she doesn't know he doesn't love her.

he has literally told me tho, and i was not in the slightest surprised which he was a bit taken aback by, from what i remember

basically the situation: logic over emotions man stuck in a marriage with a need to be seen as good woman 'cause he feels he's responsible for her and her child's (that would be me) well being. he kind of is. he loves me, and he probably loves her to an extent, though he also resents her to an extent from what i've seen 'cause she's hard to communicate with (a very rigid person who refuses to wholly accept fault) and 'cause he has to act like he's in love with her

my position in this, as you could've guessed, is the child- who isn't taken fully seriously because they're not a grown up (dad's case) and because, well, other people aren't that complicated (mum's case, though this theory i'm most shaky on. she may wholly see other people as as complex as she is and just have a different way of showing it)- who also has the most sense and emotional intelligence

my plan, currently, is to discuss with dad potential ways he can live a happier life without divorcing my mum- i think he should break up with her but stay married so he can support us, because she should live in the real world and not in a patronising falsehood and he should not have to pretend to want sex with her, personally

and also to communicate with my mum about her Issues and how they're affecting Me in Particular (she refuses to fully apologise for neglecting my emotional health to the point i had a full blown meltdown that resulted in me being put on multiple meds (which itself happened after years of heavy depression)) so that when dad communicates with her she'll be more open to it and also won't break too greatly at the loss 'cause she'll be more secure in herself, if i do it right

basically i'm masterminding my parents into being healthier god damn adults. i'd love to not have to do this, but unless i mastermind them at least a little, they literally Will Not do anything about this in the nearest future. like eventually they will, maybe, but like within a year? highly unlikely, they have the emotional maturity of early teenagers. like, respectfully.

i mean, i acknowledge my dad may bring up smth i haven't thought of as a counter to my proposition, 'cause he is intelligent, and has a lot more life experience, but like. even mum sees he's dumb as a rusty screw when it comes to feelings. and she hasn't got a doctorate in those either, respectfully

ANYWAY that concludes my rant about my parents. i do love them but holy shit i'm tired WHEEZE

[theboysfromaustin]

The one where Gav's an urban legend

---

February 12, 2013

Kazuo spun in his chair, laptop precariously balanced on his lap.  Ian glanced over, "If you drop that again, I'm going to get you one of those cases like they put on toddler tablets." "I'm careful.  My balance is impeccable." "You fell down the stairs yesterday," Gav didn't even look up from his computer.  "Those stairs are a death trap."

Ian looked at the clock, "Another half hour and we can get lunch." "Sounds good." Kazuo spun in his chair again, before kicking his feet up on his desk.  He was busy scrolling through Reddit, flitting from one subreddit to the next.  Somehow, he wound up on r/Detroit, and immediately took notice of one thread -

What's the weirdest thing you've seen at night?

Kazuo looked at Gav, remembering every weird street story he'd been told.  He started scrolling, the usual nonsense popping up - haunted places, I saw Bigfoot at Burger King, the norm.  And then….

-

Okay, so when I was a teen, me and my shithead friends would go joyriding in abandoned neighborhoods, blasting music and being assholes, throwing beer bottles and smoking pot.  It was a Friday or Saturday, maybe 1 AM.  We liked to turn off our headlights to make it creepy, and I know, stupid but we were teens.  I don't remember what street it was, but the houses were all burned out, when something ran in front of our car.  My girlfriend screamed, and I turned the lights on.  There was this ginger kid, beaten up and filthy, flinching away.  He looked scared and half crazy, and then I swear to God, he took off running, climbed the side of a house like Spider-man and disappeared.  We still don't know what the fuck he was.

-

Oh thank god I'm not the only one who saw that guy.  He was fast and nimble.  Like a spider.  Never said a thing.  Saw him in a ton of places, usually after dark while joyriding.  Had a wide range and often had a pack of dogs that were NOT friendly.  There was a big Saint Bernard type that tore the bumper off my buddy's car.  It was held on with duct tape, but it's the principle.  Fuckin' Cujo.

-

I see you met the Detroit Dogman.  Tiny ginger dude.  I saw him with a pack of dogs around the old Packard plant.  He stood there and his dogs chased my friends and I out.  He was afraid of us.  I wonder what his story is, but I haven't seen him in years now, hope he got off the street.

-

Little man, long red hair?  I saw that dude stealing beef jerky and roller grill crap from a 7-Eleven.  I didn't say a word, he looked malnourished.  He left and a pack of dogs materialized out of the alley.  Weird.

-

I saw him from a distance, carrying a shovel and a bloody bundle.  I followed a bit behind, just in case he was a serial killer, and he buried it in an empty lot.  I checked it out after he left and found a huge pet cemetery,  markers with names and breeds.  It spanned a few blocks.  I don't think he's a bad guy, just prefers the company of dogs. Maybe he's a runaway, he looked young.

-

I saw him hauling a big bag of dog food. He was having trouble, but he started running when he saw me following him.  His feet and legs were all cut up.  He was FAST though.

-

man i saw this lil fucker swimming with a lot of dogs in the detroit river in fuckin november and he had a fish in his mouth like a big ol wiggly fish what the fuckkkkk

-

I saw him multiple times.  He was kind of cute in a filthy, matted way.  I wanted to ask about his dogs.  He made the city interesting.  I got close once, and he smelled like dirty Vienna sausages.  He noticed and flinched real hard, like he expected me to attack him.  Hope he's doing better now, miss seeing him around.

-

My friends and I were drinking in an abandoned K Mart at night when we heard a weird noise.  This weird little dude was on the roof, howling at the moon.  I threw a Molson bottle and he jumped off the roof and took off running.  What the hell.

-

Kazuo started giggling like a complete idiot.  These were all about Gav.  Gav, who was quietly typing at his computer and listening to music.  There were more stories.  One reply was just a low resolution photo of Gav and his pack squaring off with raccoons in a Big Boy parking lot.  Ian turned slightly, "What are you chuckling about, you degenerate?"  Kazuo wheeled himself over, handing off his laptop, "Here.  Behold."

Ian started reading, "Oh.  Oh my.  Um, Gav?" The redhead looked up, "Yeah?" "We have some things you need to read."  Gav rolled over, squeezing in to look at the screen, "What's so…oh.  This is…about….me?" "You're an urban legend." "Huh.  I mean, I know I probably scared a lot of people at night…and urban explorers…but…wow."

"You are a celebrity," Ian shrugged, "Are there more?" "It's a big thread, so maybe." "This is weird." "You okay?" "Well, the attention from strangers is a bit off putting, but that might be the autism." "The raccoon photo is impressive," Ian studied it.  "Yeah, we had to fight for the dumpsters.  You're not grossed out by me having eaten from dumpsters, are you?"

"We figured you had to do what you needed to survive." "And I've seen Ian drop a gyro in the actual road on Sixth, pick it up, dust it off, and eat it." Gav relaxed, "It was gross, but it helped me feed the group.  I could open dumpsters, and they couldn't." "So, are you going to post?  You can use my account."  Gav thought for a moment, "I think…maybe I should.  I know it'll kill a lot of the mystique, but there are people that want to know if I'm okay." "Hang on," Ian took a photo of Gav in front of the computer, "Sending this to your email, Kaz." 

Kazuo downloaded it, "Add that to your post."  Gav nodded, starting to type.

So, one of my boyfriends found this thread.  (This is his account) I am the Detroit Dogman, and I am safe in Texas after leaving Detroit in 2007.  I had a really bad home life - I'm gay, and was the unwanted twin, and left at 16 in 2005, though I'd been wandering with my pack since late 2002, when I'd found them while wandering during a night I'd run away from home.  We did live in the old Packard plant, though I'd take a few days to get food or try to replace clothes and blankets.  I stole a lot, and I'm not proud of it, but I'd also panhandle, scared as I was of people, to get dog food.

We did fish the Detroit river, and it was the only fresh meat I had while on the street.  I wouldn't call fast food dumpster diving 'fresh'.  Life was rough, but at least I could provide entertaining stories and some scares.

As I said, I'm safe in Texas.  Austin.  I have two wonderful boyfriends who pulled me off the street, and gave me a home and a job - I'm a paralegal now, my one partner is a lawyer, and I'm happy and healthy now.  I'm attaching a photo of me in front of this thread.  I look forward to more stories.  I had to leave my dogs behind because there was no safe way for us to all travel together.  I miss them, and I hope they're okay.  My name is Gav, by the way, to put a name to the dirty, bedraggled face.

Signed, the Detroit Dogman

Gav sat back for a moment, before hitting 'post'.  "You alright?" Ian cocked his head.  "Yeah," Gav said, "It's like I have closure. But I still get to be an urban legend.  I'm okay with that." Kazuo draped himself around Gav's shoulders, "You ready for lunch, Dogman?" "Yeah.  I think we need chili." "Good choice," Ian stood, stretching, "You've earned it."  Gav replaced Kazuo's laptop, "Hard to believe I'm a celebrity." "We'll have to look for more stories," Kazuo grinned.  "I want to compile them," Gav pulled on his coat, "Maybe write some sort of memoir -

The Dogman Chronicles."

[vitch-with-v]

Hey remember this? I do, so here's the proof

TRIGGER WARNING: UGLY ASS DRAWINGS FROM WHEN I WAS A PRE-TEEN AND LORE DROP

These are some of the first appearances of Joaquín, my "male version". He got his name after what my mom was gonna name me if i was born a boy

I had made a chart explaining all the different characters that were divisions of myself (cuz there were a lot) and here is Joaquín, who was not only my male version but also my self-esteem

Worth noticing: no, i don't have split personality or any kind of similar conditions, i was just a weird kid and i thought it was cool to give names and faces to different sides of myself, i haven't done that ever since, most of them didn't even survive past 2019, expect for him

His "presence" grew stronger in the start of the quarantine, cuz i was bored and very lonely :(, so he was basically an imaginary friend, that's why i usually drew him just hanging out with me (longer hair, pre-trans lol)

This is ME when i decided to cut all my hair off, wich is when i started questioning my gender, at this point i thought i might be non binary, but Joa still lingered, cuz i mean he was a really important character for me yk?

↑Me and Joa after my haircut... Yeaaaaahh....

Here it says "im gonna change Joa's name" (it says "don't ask why" under it, not pictured). This is also when i went oh shIT I MIGHT BE A BOY- so u can imagine WHY i wanted to change his name, you know, the name i was gonna have if I WAS A BOY??? Yeah, that didn't work out anyways cuz i ended up naming myself after some emo guy from an australian tv show that changed my brain chemistry so :p

This was also the last time i drew or ever mentioned him, after this he basically fucking died and i forgot about him completely + i stopped drawing and journaling for like a year or so (consider that i used to do it almost every day)

I find it crazy looking through my old sketchbooks and seeing my actual self from today be depicted as a "character", this is literally how i draw myself TODAY (with a lot of improvement ok? This is from like 2020/2021)

And i almost forgot to mention, but i was a hardcore fujoshi in 2019 (wich really fucked me in the head cuz it's not good to be reading porn at such a young age but oh well-), and so i used to ship Joa with one of my best friends oc's and we'd joke that they were gay and jaja funny they're gay yk hehe jiji jaja yk?

Thanks to the quarantine i started interacting with ACTUAL queer content, made by ACTUAL queer people, depicting what it's ACTUALLY LIKE to be part of the lgbt+ community, and not the fetishization of gay men made by and for (mostly) straight women, wich also made me feel real bad cuz i was like "oh no I've been fetishizing gay men all this time! Im a straight woman, it's weird for me to like gay men so much!" And honey do i have news for you :).

But i was pleased to find im not the only one that went thru the "fujoshi straight/might be a lesbian girl to transgender gay man" pipeline, it's crazy how there is no original experience, ive seen a gazillion fuckers who went thru the same shit, wich is surprising cuz how the fuck u go from "might be a lesbian" to "im a gay man", but hey, at least im not alone :))

If you read all that, you either really wanna know me, you have too much free time, or u need help HSKSHAKA. But yeah, jst wanted to share my experience, bc i still think about it till this day, and i still think of him every now and then

I don't think im ever bringing him back, or maybe i will, who knows, but for now he has a home in the black box with all my old sketchbooks, and i hope he's comfy in there ;)

the song made me giggle a lil as a trans guy

[tyrannuspitch]

yes i'm still thinking abt sherlock sorry. i am thinking about it because i can't decide how i feel about it and i want to know why.

it's interesting thinking abt sherlock himself bc i haven't done so in over a decade and he is not much like i remember him. i was expecting him to be waaay worse. (as a person and as a piece of writing.)

but still. he falls in a weird place which is pretty close to my fictional character Type but not quite there. and ALSO has elements of character types i just find very very annoying. and like he's interesting enough to analyse a bit and find some likely indications of inner turmoil (the man goes around claiming to be a ~heartless socipath~, he is sooo armoured and clearly not without reason) but the show itself is not angst-orientated at all so we never get a close, direct look at that side of him. which both appeals to my fan instincts (free real estate) and simultaneously makes me go "why bother, i've seen it done better elsewhere".

also the gay thing IS bothering me because i know those fuckers never meant anything sincere by it but they did leave the door wide open and i would like this man better if he WERE gay it would be INTERESTING maybe i'll MAKE him gay just to spite them and anyway i deserve it as compensation for encountering this show in my formative years. but no that's a terrible idea my creative brain barely functions when powered by All Consuming Obsession i really doubt spite is going to do anything for it. but. what if.

god. i don't fucking know. throwing darts at a pinboard of this show rn. what are we

[wonderousmonarch]

Kamen Rider Wizard Thoughts 6

I'm thankful for Christmas and another Kamen Rider

Episode 16

- chrimbas episode!!! I can't wait for another major character death!!!!

- back in da woods

- uh oh silent hill

- Wiseman and his Slenderman forest

- dude are the phantoms going to fucking steal Christmas

- "Let me call up my friend, the Grinch"

- poor Rinko get her out of there

- people keep appearing behind her. it's Christmas and she's in a horror game

- THE KRAKEN APPEARS

- what are the chances that this guy hates Christmas anyway

- oh damn he's boxing them

- "is the circus in town or something" real as fuck

- getting reallll humbug vibes from this guy rn

- oh never mind he loves Christmas

- #1 Christmas Fan vs #1 Christmas Hater

- hey this is that alley where shroud told Phillip and Ryu to fuck

- oh damn he's working away

- Shunpei why are you such a negative nancy

- is he raising money for the orphanage

- OH HES BUYING PRESENTS FOR THE KIDS!!!

- Phoenix is going to blow up an orphanage

- dude he's actually going to fucking steal Christmas

- "dude I'm also a fucking wizard I can do some cool Christmas magic"

- they would be able to - I completely forgot what I was typing

- HOLY SHIT THE BACKFLIP TRANSFORMATION???

- oooh the double despair

- "I'm red now fucker. More red then you'll ever be"

- Haruto stop using fire against the Phoenix. the fire bird. it obviously isn't going to work

- THE PRESENTS!!! :(

- I REMEMBERED what I was typing earlier. they would be able to get so much more done if phoenix would stop fucking throwing. but apparently he wasn't throwing and he was doing a cool trick so it's ok

- anyway time for John despairment

- finally using his fucking head. water against fire

- is this why they call him the drink

- DAMN THE SYNERGY!!!

- dude got mad combos

- Haruto is going to go punch the Christmas cheer back into him. what a goat.

- I feel like we haven't been to an underworld in a while, though maybe it's just been a while since I've watched wizard

- dragon shoe time!

- SANTA JUMPSCARE

- HE ACTUALLY KICKED THE CHRISTMAS CHEER BACK INTO HIM HOLY SHIT

- damn he's been in there all day

- the flaming ice regeneration goes hard

- bro the fucking Christmas ring

- HOLY SHIT THE POWER OF CHRISTMAS CHEER

- certified Santa Believer Haruto

that was a sweet episode. unlike SOME Christmas Specials I know *glares at Ex-Aid*

Episode 17

- the wizard Ring that makes you gay

- also this episode is called "Another Wizard" I think it's time for the second rider

- dude Shunpei is having a stroke did Haruto hit him with testicular tortion

- bro died in the street

- Wiseman in public 😳

- woah Mr bug

- Shoma you're 11 years too early

- also jesus this guy looks like he kisses men so hard /pos

- oh my god Shunpei is going to fucking die

- why did he hit her with the winger wag to spinning mayonnaise bottle combo

- why is he carrying around a mayonnaise bottle

- what a freak

- oh the ghouls are going to interrupt his meal :(

- he's having such a bad day let this man eat his fucking corn dogs

- even the ghouls are like "bro wtf is this guy in about"

- oh his meal. he isnt talking about his hotdogs is he

- why does the big use cards? are those cards?

- what a kind man complimenting his opponent

- the poison! secret scorpion technique!

- Why am I hearing Eminem

- OH HES A FORTUNE TELLER that explains the cards

- bro he totally rigged those cards

- the classic upside-down fool card

- MAYONNAISE ON THE DONUTS? I THINK HE NEEDS TO DIE

- bro mayonnaise thinks mayonnaise is an instrument

- oh yeah Haruto is fucking dying I forgot about that

- I feel like this is the second time I've seen a fortune-telling done underneath a big bridge

- oh he knows the tarot

- also he's only doing one card at a time. how Interesting

- "the thing that gives me strength is this gun I keep in my back pocket"

- "Im the only one who can fight the phantoms" chat does he know

- oh wait Koyomi is once again dropped out of her mind

- his ass is NOT LISTENING I love him

- wait we don't even know this guy's name yet

- "Despair is the same as hope" real as fuck

- the poison that makes you ERROR!

- OH YEAH BABY!!!! ITS BEAST TIME

- oh his theme is BUMPING

- OH he consumes mana! that makes sense

- he's just like Gavv fr fr

- oh I fuck with his little capes.

- does the chameleon make him immune to posing

- NVM he switched to dolphin

- WAIT IT CURES POISON what a goat

- bro hit him with "your next line is"

- go my birds

- is that a fucking gambling sword? the sword that makes you gamble?

- I love him so much

I will watch more later, as for now I must go eat Turkey and Potatoes and Cranberry but this show is so silly and I love it