#Harrison Ford In The Late 70s

[your-unfriendlyghost]

you think any of the guys in the s.e. hinton-verse would be into star wars?? I feel like johnny def would, steve at first pretends to hate it but would stand in the living room in that arms-crossed-dad-way while someone is watching and end up being super into it, potentially unpopular opinion but pony would Not be a fan of any sci-fi shit, it feels too easy to mention m&m but I mean c’mon lmao 😭😭 but idk!! dump your thoughts if you’re interested ksjsksjd

Yeah definitely! Star Wars comes out in the ‘77, ig, I think they allude to it in “Tex” (Jamie says smth abt “the smuggler” in the the movie she saw being hot, n the only film w/ a smuggler in it that came out then that I know of is “A New Hope”), so by the time The Outsiders greasers see it, they’re in their mid-late 20s? Idk I’m not gonna think hard abt the timeline lol

-Johnny would automatically like it, b/c it’s fast paced and fun and just a good time.

-Dally would probably be a Han Solo fan but ya couldn’t pay him to admit it out loud. But he high key wants to be Harrison Ford. -Cherry would 100% like Leia I think! She’d go into Star Wars thinking it’s a silly kid movie but she’d end up really liking it

-You’re right, I think Pony’s a sci-fi hater. He’d like Star Wars for the uniqueness (for the time lol lord knows the market’s oversaturated nowadays), but he wouldn’t be particularly eager to see the next films unless he’s going with Johnny or Cherry or some other friend. He just can’t imagine wanting to be someplace so…alien, even if it’s just in your imagination?? (Idk that’s why I don’t usually /love/ sci fi, so)

-Soda would go nuts about the ships. If he’d been a little kid when he first saw it, he’d have totally collected little starship toys (totally not projecting or anything) He’d get bored during the slower parts, but he’d get real into the fight scenes

-Steve would dislike Luke Skywalker because he reminds him of Ponyboy. But he’d love the starships like Soda, and he’d like Han Solo like Dally. He’d act like he’s too cool to like it, but he also is one of the first ones in line to get tickets when “Empire” comes out a few years later. He’d definitely prefer American Graffiti tho over Star Wars- more hot rods, more drag racing, more good music (btw John, the greaser in AG, and the little girl, Carol, are like 70% Steve and Ponyboy to me lol)

-Darry would think it’s a kid film, but he’d end up liking it okay

-Two-Bit would think it’s cool, but he’d also be kinda drunk and not sure how much of it was actually in the film and how much of it was just him being buzzed. Leia would low-key remind him of Marcia, although that could just be because they’re both hot brunettes with sharp tongues. Marcia would adore the comparison

-M&M strikes me as a sci fi enjoyer so I bet he’d become a Star Wars nerd. The only thing I guess he wouldn’t be keen on is the war part seeing as he’s a hippie n all. But ig the point of Star Wars is…ending the war and achieving peace, so that seems in line w/ his beliefs? Idk my Ma’s a former hippie and she always dug Star Wars so I think it’s fine lol

May rb w/ more characters later, idk!

[scarletwidow007]

Young Harrison Ford, late ‘70s

[stewblog]

Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny

We don’t allow our heroes to age. James Bond gets recast every couple decades. Comic book heroes rarely get older in any meaningful way. Et cetera. It’s understandable that the characters we’ve immortalized into the modern canon retain an air of (variable) youthfulness, but it also means that they are all but required to have the same sorts of adventures and largely stay the same as a person.

Harrison Ford has no interest in allowing Indiana Jones to achieve immortality, as his fifth and final outing as the character proclaims loud and clear.

Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny never hits the highs of any of its predecessors, but I posit that it’s not necessarily trying to. Indy does plenty of Indy things (and lightly stretches audience credulity in the process), but by and large Ford and director James Mangold treat the character like he’s aged into his late 70s, both in action and in thought. This movie isn’t intended to be held up as an equal to its genre-defining predecessors. It’s a coda for an icon and in that respect it’s a fully entertaining and occasionally poignant work.

The film kicks off with an opening sequence that’s as fun and rousing as any of the preceding films. The voice modulation on Ford could have used some tweaking but the de-aging special effects are remarkable and for about 15 minutes or so, it’s easy enough to believe that we’re looking at Indy still in his prime, punching lots of Nazis and performing incredible feats of derring do.

Then we cut to the film’s present day. It’s 1969 and Henry Jones, Jr. is now a man out of time. The world around him has passed him by as men are landing on the moon (put there by Nazi scientists hired by the U.S. government). Socio-political movements are upheaving everyday life. Ironically, while he’s no longer a nigh-absent professor, none of his students have any interest in ancient history. Although even his career is leaving him behind with retirement imminent and Marion is filing for divorce.

The only connection he seemingly has left to a life gone by is his goddaughter, Helena (Phoebe Waller-Bridge). So when Helena shows up out of nowhere, proclaiming she knows how to find a the second half of a dial that can supposedly turn back time, he plunges head-first back into action. The search for Archimedes’ Antikythera nearly drove Helena’s father crazy, but it’s also clear that Indy sees a darker side to Helena’s search and he refuses to let her go down the darker path of seeking artifacts for “fortune and glory” as he nearly did. Throw in some Nazis seeking the dial to rectify Hitler’s megalomaniacal mistakes and you’ve got all the trappings of a classic, globetrotting Indiana Jones adventure.

So why can’t it fully capture the magic of The Man in the Hat’s previous (good) escapades? Well, for one, James Mangold is no Steven Spielberg. No one is. Not even Spielberg, at times (see: Kingdom of the Crystal Skull). There’s simply a magic to the entire affair that is incapable of being replicated in full, try though Mangold does. And to his credit, there are portions of the film that have the spark and kineticism of Spielberg’s Indy films at their best. The World War 2-set opening on a Nazi transport train is simply outstanding and presents a near-perfect mini-adventure for the character. It’s got just about everything you could want from an Indy action setpiece. The car chase through Morocco is also well-staged and full of humor and thrills (even if I couldn’t stop giggling at the idea that little tuk-tuk carts characters drive are somehow capable of traveling at blazing speeds enough to keep pace with full-engine cars). But even once the film is fully rolling, it’s still centered on a character on the cusp of turning 80 years old. And while Indy’s age never fully defies believability, there’s only so much a movie can do if you want to maintain that hold.

Thankfully, the film’s best material leans into the fact that Indiana Jones is in his twilight, and that it’s impossible to defy time and that it is, in fact, essential to embrace it, to understand that some things must pass, that some things are impossible to change. But also, that living in the past (both literally and figuratively) is a fool’s errand.

Dial of Destiny is a reminder that we are more than just the best memories of our lives. Heroes age. Heroes make mistakes. Heroes go beyond what they’ve been immortalized as. That may be a slightly depressing thought, but Mangold and Ford lean into the humanity of it. This is Indiana Jones at his most vulnerable, but it becomes a story about a man finally coming to terms with the good and bad that has weaved in and out of his life as he finally realizes what’s important is what’s in front of you, not behind you.

What makes the Indiana Jones movies so special and different from so many other action adventure movies is that they obliterate cynicism. In Raiders of the Lost Ark, Temple of Doom and Last Crusade, each of those adventures ends with Indy learning more about himself, about the world he knows and the parts of it he can’t explain. He starts each of those stories cynical about something, and ends them with his eyes opened to how he was wrong. That element, that destruction of cynicism is what drives the heart of Dial of Destiny. It may lack the dynamism of Spielberg’s entries at their best, but it retains the beating heart of the character and his evolution. It’s a touching, meaningful ending to an immortalized character who has never felt more human than he does now at the end of his adventures.

[envyq00]

I can tell how much effort you put into your Narrator design he looks so cool (completely positive) (like goddamn how do you NOT mess up that goodly) (the man ever)

WAHH thank you so much!!!

A lot did go into him. Allow me to ramble for a moment about my inspirations for him:

1) Peter Jones

According to an interview with Kevan Brighting by Cressup on YouTube, he said he got inspiration for the Narrator's voice from Peter Jones in the original radio play of the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy. So I already had a good idea of where to go with my Narrator, specifically the vibe of a late 60s -70s radio host. Mixed with 80s work clothes as well.

2) Various 60s-80s work clothes.

I just looked stuff up on Pinterest but these first two pics of Gregory Peck and Clint Eastwood REALLY gave me a lot of the vibes I wanted to go for. (Also Harrison Ford in the 2010s but Tumblr has a 10 image limit 😭😭). I also thought Saul Goodman/Jimmy McGill fit the vibe as well. Moreso in looks than personality but Idk. Maybe that as well.

3) Stylization from other cartoons

And then to kind of stylize the look I wanted to go for, I looked at different characters and cartoons. Specifically, Ford Pines from Gravity Falls (especially him bc I thought it was funny that he had a brother named Stanley so I mean duh. Plus Alex Hirsch IS in Ultra Deluxe which is hilarious), a lot of concept art from Batman the animated series, and especially the Iron Giant. I'm actually planning to make a short animation with the Narrator and a scene from the Iron Giant for a class project! (Actually tbh, I definitely wanted to capture babygirl vibes that everyone's been talking about on Twitter and I know Saul Goodman and Kent Mansley definitely had those vibes XDD.)

4) Other internet artists

I don't want to repost their art without permission so I'll just mention names:

Forte-Girl7's/Forte7's Wheatley gijinka was actually the first gijinka I've ever seen for like anything and considering that the Narrator (especially in Ultra Deluxe) gave me more Wheatley vibes, I wanted to kind of pay tribute to her.

Also you've ever seen Bechnokid's Yokai Watch/Whisper art, that was also a big inspiration dhsjjsjs.

And of course there are the GOATs like MissAzura and CYM-K whose takes on the Narrator I've adored and actually got me into this fandom in the first place. Sooooo yeah!

There's also my own OC whom the Narrator reminded me incessantly of and he also played a part of my own Narrator design. And of course a biiiit of Kevan Brighting himself mixed with my pure imagination coming up with a simultaneously vague and particular image of what the narrator looked like in my head.

And of course, there were other things in game that informed the Narrator's character that I wanted to translated into his character design (i.e squarish shape language bc of his perfectionism and obsession with structure but also cuz of the exposed developer textures and of course the color scheme being close to the office colors in the game).

But yeah! There's more I could talk about in terms of the Narrator as a character but I'm saving that for later hehehheheh

[subspace]

Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny

We don’t allow our heroes to age. James Bond gets recast every couple decades. Comic book heroes rarely get older in any meaningful way. Et cetera. It’s understandable that the characters we’ve immortalized into the modern canon retain an air of (variable) youthfulness, but it also means that they are all but required to have the same sorts of adventures and largely stay the same as a person.

Harrison Ford has no interest in allowing Indiana Jones to achieve immortality, as his fifth and final outing as the character proclaims loud and clear.

Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny never hits the highs of any of its predecessors, but I posit that it’s not necessarily trying to. Indy does plenty of Indy things (and lightly stretches audience credulity in the process), but by and large Ford and director James Mangold treat the character like he’s aged into his late 70s, both in action and in thought. This movie isn’t intended to be held up as an equal to its genre-defining predecessors. It’s a coda for an icon and in that respect it’s a fully entertaining and occasionally poignant work.

The film kicks off with an opening sequence that’s as fun and rousing as any of the preceding films. The voice modulation on Ford could have used some tweaking but the de-aging special effects are remarkable and for about 15 minutes or so, it’s easy enough to believe that we’re looking at Indy still in his prime, punching lots of Nazis and performing incredible feats of derring do.

Then we cut to the film’s present day. It’s 1969 and Henry Jones, Jr. is now a man out of time. The world around him has passed him by as men are landing on the moon (put there by Nazi scientists hired by the U.S. government). Socio-political movements are upheaving everyday life. Ironically, while he’s no longer a nigh-absent professor, none of his students have any interest in ancient history. Although even his career is leaving him behind with retirement imminent and Marion is filing for divorce.

The only connection he seemingly has left to a life gone by is his goddaughter, Helena (Phoebe Waller-Bridge). So when Helena shows up out of nowhere, proclaiming she knows how to find a the second half of a dial that can supposedly turn back time, he plunges head-first back into action. The search for Archimedes’ Antikythera nearly drove Helena’s father crazy, but it’s also clear that Indy sees a darker side to Helena’s search and he refuses to let her go down the darker path of seeking artifacts for “fortune and glory” as he nearly did. Throw in some Nazis seeking the dial to rectify Hitler’s megalomaniacal mistakes and you’ve got all the trappings of a classic, globetrotting Indiana Jones adventure.

So why can’t it fully capture the magic of The Man in the Hat’s previous (good) escapades? Well, for one, James Mangold is no Steven Spielberg. No one is. Not even Spielberg, at times (see: Kingdom of the Crystal Skull). There’s simply a magic to the entire affair that is incapable of being replicated in full, try though Mangold does. And to his credit, there are portions of the film that have the spark and kineticism of Spielberg’s Indy films at their best. The World War 2-set opening on a Nazi transport train is simply outstanding and presents a near-perfect mini-adventure for the character. It’s got just about everything you could want from an Indy action setpiece. The car chase through Morocco is also well-staged and full of humor and thrills (even if I couldn’t stop giggling at the idea that little tuk-tuk carts characters drive are somehow capable of traveling at blazing speeds enough to keep pace with full-engine cars). But even once the film is fully rolling, it’s still centered on a character on the cusp of turning 80 years old. And while Indy’s age never fully defies believability, there’s only so much a movie can do if you want to maintain that hold.

Thankfully, the film’s best material leans into the fact that Indiana Jones is in his twilight, and that it’s impossible to defy time and that it is, in fact, essential to embrace it, to understand that some things must pass, that some things are impossible to change. But also, that living in the past (both literally and figuratively) is a fool’s errand.

Dial of Destiny is a reminder that we are more than just the best memories of our lives. Heroes age. Heroes make mistakes. Heroes go beyond what they’ve been immortalized as. That may be a slightly depressing thought, but Mangold and Ford lean into the humanity of it. This is Indiana Jones at his most vulnerable, but it becomes a story about a man finally coming to terms with the good and bad that has weaved in and out of his life as he finally realizes what’s important is what’s in front of you, not behind you.

What makes the Indiana Jones movies so special and different from so many other action adventure movies is that they obliterate cynicism. In Raiders of the Lost Ark, Temple of Doom and Last Crusade, each of those adventures ends with Indy learning more about himself, about the world he knows and the parts of it he can’t explain. He starts each of those stories cynical about something, and ends them with his eyes opened to how he was wrong. That element, that destruction of cynicism is what drives the heart of Dial of Destiny. It may lack the dynamism of Spielberg’s entries at their best, but it retains the beating heart of the character and his evolution. It’s a touching, meaningful ending to an immortalized character who has never felt more human than he does now at the end of his adventures.

[theuntitledblog]

Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny (2023) - REVIEW

SYNOPSIS

On the brink of retirement, Indiana Jones is forced to don the hat and whip one last time to save his goddaughter from the last Nazi threat as she's caught up in the pursuit of an ancient artifact that could change the course of human history.

I'm no Indiana Jones aficionado despite being raised on the Steven Spielberg/George Lucas films of the late 70's and 80's, somehow Indiana Jones managed to pass me by. As a result I'm not a devoted fan of the series, I even thought that the reaction to the last outing (Kingdom of the Crystal Skull) was and is over the top. With that said however, Dial of Destiny is a better film than Crystal Skull; it looks better, the story is better, it doesn't have too many characters and the various set pieces are rather thrilling and exciting. Harrison Ford effortlessly dons the cap one final time and seamlessly steps back into the role that helped turn him into a superstar. James Mangold doesn't let the character down even if he can't quite create a film that stands on par with the originals.

Dial of Destiny starts very strong with an extended sequence set in the dying days of World War II as a younger Indy clashes with the Nazis once again in the pursuit of an ancient artifact. The train set piece is fast and thrilling filled with near hits, misses and even a few typical Indy jibes. Yet as fun as it is, the de-aging technology is still not quite there and is enough of a distraction to be noticeable and slightly tarnishes what is a strong start none the less. From the escape sequence in 1969 New York to an extended chase set piece in Tangier, from an action set piece point of view, this is a film that never disappoints. Also helping the film are the new characters introduced with Phoebe Waller-Bridge's Helena Shaw being an absolute highlight while enjoying great chemistry with Ford's Indy. Mads Mikkelsen is always dependable and makes for particularly nasty Nazi villain but this is, as it always should be, Harrison Ford's film.

As fun as it is, it is a film that doesn't tread a lot of new ground (pre-finale). There isn't much in here that hasn't been seen before which isn't necessarily a bad thing but the film does feel like it missing a magic ingredient to raise it up somewhat and that ingredient is humour. When the film does slow down, the exchanges between Indy and Helena are witty, sharp and occasionally melancholic but there aren't a lot of laughs in there. Whether this is by design I'm not sure but the pursuit of another ancient artifact is only as fun as far as the puzzles, traps and set pieces go and without the humour backing it all up, Dial of Destiny feels like its missing something. It's a shame because the cast, set pieces and characters are strong enough and a healthy dose of humour could've pushed Dial of Destiny to greater heights. Dial of Destiny never a bad film and it is still a lot of fun especially with its bold and crazy finale but I also have this feeling that it could've been better than it is.

VERDICT

Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny is an improvement on Kingdom of the Crystal Skull with a great cast and thrilling set pieces plus another great turn by Harrison Ford as the titular hero. But there's no escaping the feeling that it could be a more rewarding experience with a healthy injection of humour.

4/5

[goosebumpsbookclub]

The Curse of the Mummy's Tomb

Would you believe me if I said I actually read this book, like, ten months ago? And yet I haven't brought myself to write about it. It's just... so... odd.

So, okay. Mummies. Yes. It makes total sense that R.L. Stine tackled mummies early on in the series. But the weird thing is that he actually kind of didn't. Hear me out.

This book stars twelve-year-old Gabe, who's on vacation in Egypt, and starts out with this banger of a line: "I saw the Great Pyramid and got thirsty." Gabe is Egyptian American, which I think was an unexpected choice on R.L.'s part. He's not just a tourist; he's visiting family while his parents are on a business trip. So he has a personal connection to Egypt, although he also regards it with a sense of detachment, probably because he's grown up far away from the country his grandparents were born in. That's a compelling tension that R.L. probably isn't really equipped to mine, and doesn't seem interested in mining. Instead, Gabe just complains about being hot and fantasizes about "[f]ighting off ancient Egyptians who had come back to life to defend their sacred tomb, and escaping after a wild chase, just like Indiana Jones." Listen, I'm not Egyptian, so I could be wrong, but it seems a bit odd to me that an Egyptian kid--especially one whose dad is super interested in history--would find his first trip to Egypt boring because he didn't get to fight his ancestors in hand-to-hand combat.

But, okay, it is kind of refreshing that this isn't just another white kid. And his uncle Ben is a famous Egyptian archaeologist--like, an actual regular scientist from Egypt, not a Harrison Ford type. Ben is cool; he's fun, he's smart, he's kind of dorky. I liked him! His daughter Sari is the obligatory Annoying Girl Character. Ben is investigating tunnels under the pyramid and brings Gabe and Sari with him, where they meet Ahmed, who is just kind of ambiently scary. Whoops! We had a good thing going with Gabe and his family being normal, not-scary Egyptians, but I guess we needed to throw in one spooky one who likes to stare menacingly and rant about ancient curses. Oh, Robert.

What follows is a bit of filler: Ben's team starts getting sick, presumably for curse reasons. Gabe and Sari go to a museum and Ahmed chases them through it because he's weird and scary. We are now late in the book and there have been no mummies beyond the regular dead ones in the museum. When Gabe, Sari, and Ben return to the pyramid (why does he keep bringing these kids to work with him), they end up in a mummy preparation chamber, and Ahmed tells them they have to die for violating the chamber of an ancient priestess, which, okay. He even reveals that he scared the "sick" workers off in an effort to make Ben stop his investigation. So far--and we are nearing the end--this is not a fantasy book but instead a sort-of thriller about a Scooby-Doo villain. Then Gabe activates the totally normal mummy hand Ben gifted him, which is actually "the Hand of the Priestess" (what are the chances!), and all the mummies in the room come to life and scare Ahmed off. This is page 67 of a 70 page book. The mummies quickly go back to being dead again, and that's it. That's the entirety of the actual mummy content.

What happened here? Did R.L. Stine forget he needed to include monsters in his books? I can't imagine he would have handled them very well--he does a shaky enough job with Egyptian history and culture in the rest of the book--but I at least expected them to be there. Imagine if the undisputed king of racist mummy tales from the 90’s, 1999’s The Mummy, was an hour and forty-five minutes of Brendan Fraser noticing that things are getting a little spooky around here and fifteen minutes of there being a mummy. That's this book. I don't even know what to say, what to analyze. I'm so stuck on there being basically no mummies.

It’s worth noting the obvious, though: This book falls into a long tradition of white colonialist fascination with ancient Egyptian artifacts and dehumanization of the people mummies were in life, an attitude that even British museum curators, famously not the most anticolonialist bunch, have started pushing back against. I’m not surprised, of course—Goosebumps is much more about repackaging classic (white American) horror tropes for kids than it is about challenging them—but I reserve the right to roll my eyes at it.

There's no plot twist at the end, a rarity for Goosebumps, but I know there's a sequel. So I'm expecting there to be more mummies in that one. There must be. Right? Right?

Cover: Both the old and the new covers prominently feature a scary mummy, which is misleading. What I like about the old Jacobus one is that the mummy is definitely scary, what with the glowing red eyes and everything, but he's also just some guy. He looks like he's taking a school picture. 2/5

Scare factor: None. Nothing. It's only scary if you find Egyptian history (and present-day Egyptian introverts named Ahmed) inherently terrifying. In which case I have some questions for you. 0/5

Monster content: -12/5. Do better!

[tentpoletrauma]

After acquiring Lucasfilm in 2012, Disney was banking big on a 5th installment of the beloved and lucrative Indiana Jones franchise. After years of development and the passing of the torch from original director Steven Spielberg to the capable James Mangold, Harrison Ford — now in his late 70s — agreed to don the whip and fedora for one last adventure. Unfortunately the resulting Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny bombed hard at the box office to the tune of an estimated 100 million dollar loss. Join Sebastian, Chris and Rodney as they turn back time, dust off some ancient tombs and wrestle with the world-altering consequences of this dial of disaster.

[cola-canine]

I enjoyed Indiana Jones 5.

Yes, it's better than 4. No, it's not better than the originals - it's just plain good fun. Spoilers below. 7.5/8 out of 10.

Yes it gets Indy 4-levels of silly with its plot but it's done a lot better. The dial is a time travel device and they do go back in time briefly. They do not kill Indy off, however Harrison Ford is practically screaming "Holy shit just let me die already." for a solid five minutes.

The scenery and setting in the beginning is so active and visually fun. That late 70s city look with the parade reminded me a lot of Wolfenstein II and made for a great chase sequence.

Sucks that they killed off Shaunette Renée Wilson's character in the first act because I was LOVING her outfit and was more curious about her character.

Much like every Indy movie, I had trouble remembering characters' names. Very briefly mentioned then almost never used again. Hell, until recently I didn't know most of the characters in the original HAD names. Just Indy versus "villain."

Dislikes:

Deepfake Ford is good in parts, but looks video-game model-y still. It's an improvement on the technology for sure, and the part it's used in is a very fun start to the movie.

Green/bluescreen is very noticeable in the driving parts. There was a dubbed line in the cave before all the echoes that was really noticeable.

Good movie, worth a rewatch. A lot better than I thought it'd be.

[themovieblogonline]

Al Pacino Turned Down Han Solo As Star Wars

Could you imagine an Al Pacino Han Solo? Star Wars is a cultural phenomenon that has had a profound impact on American culture since its debut in 1977. Al Pacino was a fresh faced force in Hollywood in the late 70s. The epic space opera created by George Lucas has not only captivated audiences worldwide but has also influenced and inspired numerous aspects of American society. The Star Wars franchise has become deeply ingrained in popular culture, with references and merchandise appearing everywhere from TV shows to Halloween costumes. The iconic lightsaber, Darth Vader's mask, and Chewbacca's roar are just a few examples of the franchise's cultural impact. One important aspect of the franchise could have been very different if actor Al Pacino made a different decision early in his career. Yes, Pacino almost joined Mark Hamill, Carrie Fisher, Alec Guinness, and Peter Mayhew in a galaxy far, far away as the rogue smuggler, Han Solo. The 82-year-old actor was discussing his lengthy career during a talk at The 92nd Street Y in New York on Wednesday when he recalled his brush with "Star Wars" (via Variety). He explained that he was offered so many projects at the time because he was the "new kid on the block." Pacino said: "Well, I turned down 'Star Wars.' When I first came up, I was the new kid on the block... you know what happens when you first become famous. It's like, 'Give it to Al.' They'd give me Queen Elizabeth to play." He went on to say that he passed on "Star Wars" because he didn't understand it, although he didn't say what specifically confused him about the script. He then joked that because he didn't play Han Solo, it led to stardom for Harrison Ford. The star said: "They gave me a script called 'Star Wars.' They offered me so much money. I don't understand it. I read it. So I said I couldn't do it. I gave Harrison Ford a career." The idea of Al Pacino playing Han Solo in the Star Wars franchise is incredibly fascinating. One can only imagine the intensity and raw energy that he would have brought to the role. It is fascinating to consider how his portrayal of Han Solo would have influenced the character's trajectory and the franchise's direction as a whole. Al Pacino has always been known for his dynamic performances and his ability to bring complex characters to life. From his iconic role as Michael Corleone in The Godfather to his portrayal of Tony Montana in Scarface, Al Pacino has consistently delivered some of the most memorable performances in film history. His charisma, intensity, and natural acting ability make him an ideal choice for any role he takes on, including that of Han Solo. If Al Pacino had been cast as Han Solo, it is certain that the character would have been imbued with a different energy and sensibility. The character's witty one-liners and cocky swagger would have taken on a different dimension, and it would have been fascinating to see how this would have influenced the franchise's trajectory. The idea of Al Pacino playing Han Solo is intriguing. It is one of those "what if" scenarios that will continue to spark the imagination of Star Wars fans for years to come. Al Pacino's dynamic acting abilities, combined with his undeniable on-screen charisma, would undoubtedly have resulted in a memorable portrayal of the beloved character. It is truly a shame that this casting never came to fruition, but it is always interesting to speculate on what could have been. Read the full article

[aiiaiiiyo]

[bowelfly]

while i usually keep this blog focused on art and bugs, movies are my third big passion, and since i don't believe in streaming services i don't have a spotify wrapped for 2022 to show off but i do have a letterboxd account so i felt like going through my 2022 movie watching stats. this post is basically for me alone and will be obnoxiously long so i'll put in a read more thing here out of courtesy:

ooh so close to almost 1000 hours of movies! still 718 films is pretty good, though that does also include around 80 or so shorts, mostly animations, that i also logged.

i was averaging around 2 movies per day for the year. being 500 miles away from all your friends, family, and partner does give you a lot of free time it turns out. the most movies i watched in a single week, december 10-16, was 28. the weeks i only watched a couple things were either when i was visiting my partner or too depressed to even watch movies

one of the things i've done this year to keep myself sane in isolation was to stream movies for friends. however since i have multiple non-overlapping friend groups, there were a number of movies i watched multiple times because i have a deep psychological and emotional need to share weird shit with the people i care about. NOVA SEED, FANTASY MISSION FORCE, and BUDDHA'S PALM were the triple crown winners this year.

i only watched 7 movies that came out in 2022. my sweet spot is genre movies made from the late 70s through the mid-90s which you can see clearly if you look at my lifetime stats. predictably, i have very strong opinions about practical effects and stunts and film stock

my ratings spread for 2022 is about what it normally is for other years with a lot of things ending up in the 3.5-4 star range. maybe i'm just generous with my stars or maybe i just like what i like and try to not watch things i won't like unless they're bad in a fun way but i really feel like i've been moving away from the whole so-bad-its-good thing over the years and focusing on things that i unironically like--though these are often films that other people do categorize as bad or so-bad-its-good.

my most watched actors is a bunch of golden age hong kong dudes because i went super hard on the kung fu and wuxia films this year. like about half of these are big name stars and the other half are less well-known character actors that still are in like 200 movies playing assorted emperors and evil administrators. really glad to see my main man lo lieh running away with first place. he's most well known for playing evil white-haired kung fu masters usually named pai mei or variations of that, but he's also played the protagonist or antihero of a number of great films like FIVE FINGERS OF DEATH or THE FUGITIVE (1972, not the harrison ford one). my favorite role of his is without question Bi Gu of East Island the rascally kung fu wizard who hollers his name from offscreen before every time he enters a scene in BUDDHA'S PALM (1982).

also very pleased to see one of my favorite american character actors, brion james squeaking his way onto the list, though sad that he got separated from his best friend and frequent collaborator tim thomerson, who i think is just below the cut here.

most watched directors. i've been a huge fan of the very recently deceased albert pyun for years now, largely on the strength of his absolute god-tier masterpiece NEMESIS (1992) though he has a number of other very entertaining movies (RADIOACTIVE DREAMS, CYBORG) and also a cavalcade of very bad movies that are nonetheless all fascinating in their own ways. i could go on about him at length but this post is long enough. maybe another time.

other than that, chor yuen (THE MAGIC BLADE, DESCENDANT OF THE SUN) and chang cheh (CRIPPLED AVENGERS, FIVE ELEMENT NINJAS) are gods of early wuxia cinema and fucking rule, and keita amemiya's 90s work (ZEIRAM, MECHANICAL VIOLATOR HAKAIDER, CYBER NINJA) are pinnacles of kickass japanese practical effects work.

i also watched a lot of russ meyer and john waters films because i'm a pevert.

this is mostly just a reminder to check out my WUXIA WIZARD WARS tumblr post and letterboxd list if you like movies about wizards shooting lasers at each other and summoning fucked up monsters and shit like that

finally, because i have a brain disease, i made a list of the 100 best films i watched this year, mostly first-time watches but probably like 15-20 rewatches that i especially enjoyed or think more people should know about or give another shot. if i didn't already have way too many projects i'd consider setting up another sideblog just going through all these one by one with reviews and screenshots but that's a lot of work and i am a tired old man. i might give an occasional highlight post like i did for THE BARON AGAINST THE DEMONS

and i guess that's about it? this has been an especially heavy year for golden age hong kong kung fu and wuxia films but i explored a lot of other interesting places and times and genres and microgenres and have a lot more i plan on checking out next year. i've got stacks and stacks of unwatched japanese V-cinema and pinku violence and kaiju and tokusatsu films; tons of giallo and hammer horror and eurotrash lesbian vampire flicks; classic westerns, revisionist westerns, spaghetti westerns; SOV horror, eastern european stop motion, hong kong CAT III sleaze, russian postapocalyptic dirges, poliziotteschi, krimi, and noir films; AIP and PM Entertainment action schlock; italian mad max ripoffs, italian alien ripoffs, italian conan ripoffs; approximately 300 movies with NINJA, BLOOD, or SHAOLIN in their titles; and probably some other shit too.

finally, if you've made it this far and you're a nasty little film freak like me i'll let you in on a secret: i have copies of every single one of these movies on my hard drive. literally thousands of movies dug out of dozens of digital dumpsters with my own two greasy grabby raccoon paws. if any of them particularly catch your interest but you can't find a copy, well you can maybe slip old professor bfly a little private request and get yourself a copy of whatever you need. it may take some time since i only have so many google drive accounts unless someone wants to subsidize a deluxe mega.nz subscription for me to mass-upload things to. i also have a soulseek account sharing the entire hoard but it's very slow and not always online but you can DM me for that as well. again though you may have to be patient because i am old and tired and slow and have a full time job and a hundred dumb hobbies and social anxiety and generalized brain damage

happy new year everyone now go watch a movie about some dudes kicking the shit out of each other for me

[ckerouac]

Star Wars 4-6

favorite male character: Yoda (look, I love a muppet)

favorite female character: Leia

least favorite character: Boba Fett (he’s an action figure and boring af at it, I do not understand the fan adoration, I don’t)

prettiest character: Leia

funniest character: Look, unfortunately I recently saw the video of Obi Wan creeping around the Death Star set to the Pink Panther theme and while not canonical I love it and I’m going with that

favorite season: of these three, Empire Strikes Back

favorite episode: n/a

favorite romantic ship: Han/Leia (look, I too would like to bully then fuck a late 70s/early 80s Harrison Ford…mmm he can get it)

favorite family ship: I think the Skywalkers all need therapy

favorite friend ship: Leia & Obi-Wan

worst ship: I mean, the Death Star did some problematic things

[adultswim2021]

Frisky Dingo #10: “Flowers for Nearl” | December 18, 2006 – 12:30AM | S01E10

This will likely be attached to a future post, but I stumbled on a Friday Night Fix promo (Adult Swim’s online video service that would debut new episodes on Fridays) that advertised this episode’s title as “Ten”, which makes me think these episode titles I’m displaying for Frisky Dingo came at a later date. It could also mean that whoever cut that promo together just didn’t know what the episode title was and didn’t feel like speaking to Adam Reed to figure it out.

Previously on: Simon is still a runaway. The Xtacles are still in danger of having their heads exploded each hour. Xander and Killface are both blind and being human trafficked. The Xtacles are planning to pass off Nearl, the local “retarded wino” as Xander Crewes in order to make the head explosions stop. 

This is a very memorable episode, and I remember thinking this was the best of the season. Standalone isn’t the right word, but there is a story here with a beginning, middle, and end, which is nice. It mostly focuses on the Xtacles giving Nearl a makeover, discovering that he looks exactly like Xander Crewes, and then injecting him with a brain serum to make him intelligent. He fulfills his intended purpose of making Stan think that the Xtacles have indeed captured Xander Crewes to make the exploding helmet thing stop happening.

This is when they learn Nearl’s true nature: the reason he looks like Xander Crewes is because he actually is Xander’s long-lost twin brother. He was hospitalized and abandoned on the streets when the hospital closed. This is how he became a homeless wino (Mr. Ford, the pet shop clerk from the last episode, is the orderly who drops him off). This plot thread ends when one of the Xtacles shoots him in the head point-blank. When the other Xtacles scold him, he defends his actions by claiming he was merely simplifying everyone’s lives, that the “plot” (of their lives, I mean) was getting too complicated and having a long-lost twin in the mix would only make things more annoying. The Xtacles begrudgingly, then enthusiastically agree. Real funny.

We also get a little scene showing where the real Xander winds up: with Killface in a sweatshop manufacturing Awesome-X dolls. Killface is popping off the Xander head and Xander is replacing it with Stan’s. Both of them being blind, neither of them have any idea what they are making. They do, however, find out that Simon is now running a rabbit knife-fighting ring. End of episode. 

Most of the laughs in here come from cultural references. Nearl is lured into the Xtacles’ ship because they told him it’s Babar’s house. The Wammy from Press Your Luck is a looming threat on the DNA testing machine (this scene also includes a bit of audio outtakes from the actor playing Stan. Come on guys, this isn’t Space Ghost. Nah, just joshin’, I think it’s funny, please rip-off Space Ghost more). There is a run of the 70/30 dickheads yet again flexing how well-read they are by recalling plot details of Flowers for Algernon (the plot of which largely inspired this episode, obviously), Harrison Bergeron (we get it, you’ve read Vonnegut. WELL SO HAVE I SO FUCK YOU BITCH), among other things. I think. Actually the next thing they reference is Tom Bergeron, so maybe I’m overstating things.

Lisa Lisa and Cult Jam is also referenced. I’m embarrassed to remember this but at the time this episode aired I did not know this band and thought the reference was instead to THIS SONG, which I knew because in the late 90s my mom bought it for me for Christmas. She was concerned that even though I was a teenager I did not ask for a single music CD, so she bought me Pauly Shore’s stand-up album, which had that song on it. Earlier this year I randomly found this video and realized I actually saw it in 1991 on MTV. Not only that, it was literally the first time I ever watched MTV in my whole life. I remember my friend Joe, a fellow kid who was also not allowed to watch MTV, turned to me and said “that’s why I love MTV, there’s so many babes!”

The apex of the exploding head gag is reached when one of the Xtacles mentions that he’s missing his kid’s recital, and they cut to a little girl at a piano in front of an audience at a school auditorium, sighing because her dad isn’t there and proceeding with her performance. She (and his new baby, being held by his wife shown in the crowd sitting next to an empty seat) is wearing an Xtacles helmet. The idea that his kids would have Xtacles helmets on, as if it’s an inherited trait, is so exquisitely stupid that I love it. The joke turns dark when they realize she’s susceptible to Stan’s random on-the-hour head explosions. Guess what happens next? This is a serious contender for the funniest joke in the entire series.

So that’s this one, a real peak for the series as a whole, and very likely the best episode of the season! I’m glad I got to it!

[SORRY THIS POST WAS POSTED LATER THAN USUAL I WAS JACKING OFF TO THE PAULY SHORE VIDEO]

[these-are-the-first-steps]

Rifftrax just showed the cursed star wars holiday special. I caught it towars the end, but can safely say the following:

1. They recycle a LOT of b-roll shots from the movie. 😂

2. Harrison Ford spends most of his time looking like he’s quickly dying inside every time he has to be sentimental about “life day” lmfaoooo

3. Mark is trying SO hard, bless him. His hair is weirly dyed and they put HEAVY makeup on him- I wonder if this was made right after the terrible accident he was in??? Poor guy.

4. Bea Arthur????????? Owns the Tatoine tavern????? And sings???? 😭🤣🤣🤣

5. Carrie Fisher also sings and is really good??? She’s a great classical singer!!! What a pleasant surprise!

6. Some fun comic book frames for some shots, love that.

7. Budget = not so much. Most of it looks like recycled film bits lmao. Pretty impressively solid green screen keying, though. That’s OG lucasfilm for you, though!

8. Life Day looks like a cult- they all wear red robes and walk with snow globes through space into a glowing light??? As Rifftrax put it, “I bet this is what Heaven’s Gate thought was gonna happen to them lol” 🤣

9. They kill a Trooper and lie about it. Happy Life Day. 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

10. This copy of life day was recorded when it originally aired and so included the original late ‘70s tv commercials which just made it even more priceless.

Anyway, this is an intensely silly special, aaaaand omg they’re playing it a second time. Tune in to Rifftrax on twitch now to watch it!! 😂😂😂

[momo-de-avis]

Hey Momo! Can I ask you who are your favorite villains/antagonists and why?

hmm this is a difficult one, I often forget my favourite things sjkadfhjkhgsdf

1. Queen Medb from Irish Mythology will always be my number one antagonist (I refuse to call her a villain). It’s just so incredible to me that 9th century monks clearly created this character with the intent of being a villainous antagonist to king Conchobhair Mac Nessa but made her in a way that... she’s incredibly complex and layered? She’s genuinely a character you cannot, at any given point -- and I mean a single one -- of the Táine say that she’s either 100% wrong or right (anyway, Irish mythology just doesn’t work like that), and she has one thing that is so rare in female characters of western myth, which a well established intent, a very well decided upon goal that she acts upon, disregard the outcomes or the obstacles, and on God, this bitch is gonna get it.

Also, WHERE ELSE do you get the line (something like) “sleep with a man without having another waiting in his shadow” as a MARIAGE CLAUSE TO MARRY HER. I cannot find enough words to express to you how much I love queen Medb.

(Side note, I just checked there’s a Maeve in the Throne of Glass series and I definitely DO NOT MEAN that piece of garbage okay, I just wanna clear that up)

2. Amma Crellin from Sharp Objects literally gave me the shivers and she’s thirteen, and I am talking about both book and series (Eliza Scanlan is an incredible actress, and paired up with Amy Adams? Baby..............). Then again I’m a slut for Gillian Flynn. It’s just incredible how she constructed a character so controversial that she’s two-faced, an innocent-looking blonde southern beauty who’s also this manipulative bully, and who manages to balance that so perfectly you, as the reader, struggle with that throughout the whole goddamn book. 

3. Roy Batty. Not book Roy Batty, movie Roy Batty. To be honest with you, I read Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep and the only thing I remember vividly of the book is the explanation for the title, which I thought was damn beautiful (and is not in the movie), but somehow everything else vanished. However I do remember Blade Runner Roy Batty is a lot more fleshed out than the book (he’s basically just a common criminal there?) and damn, Rutger Hauer in that final monologue under the rain, man........................ I mean, I’m sus, I fucking adore Blade Runner, and I’m a huge fan of late 70s, early 80s Harrison Ford, and I’m a huge slut for the movie’s whole german expressionism-inspired aesthetic (straight out of Metropolis) and the cyberpunk vibe, but ROY BATTY, MAN. Like, you kinda get to a point you wanna say “man, fuck Deckard”.

4. Svidrigailov from Crime and Punishment and listen, I have this whole theory about his ending that speaks to probably how Dostoievsky saw him related to the whole thesis of the book, but man, that man was a piece of shit. You don’t even fully realise how much of a piece of shit he is until Dunya comes along. He’s like ubermensch levels of nasty. The scream I let out when he did THAT. (and Crime and Punishment is one of my favourite books of all time btw)

5. So Eça de Queiroz is mandatory reading here in Portugal considering he is the leading romanticist/naturalist writer of his time, and there is one book that I absolutely fucking look that is Primo Basílio that I think in english is called Cousin Bazílio (direct translation, though for some reason the man’s name transforms the S into a Z for some reason?). I usually say about this book that it’s how Madame Bovary should have been written BECAUSE IT’S FUCKING BETTER, FIGHT ME ABOUT IT. Anyway, Basílio is obnoxious. If you’re a woman who’s ever had a girl friend who’s been brainwashed by that one fuck boy who lured her into cheating because he just wants an adventure and you KNOW that POS is gonna dump her ass the second she turns around, that’s Basílio, Every waking second reading this book is like deep sighs and boiling frustration. (Besides, one of THE best romantic characters I’ve ever seen is Juliana, but again: this is romanticism. Which means, the ending is tragic as fuck because, why the fuck not, the romantics lived for this sort of shit. If at any point of the narrative the author mentions a nightingale, you know everyone’s gonna die.)

I think these are all I can think about right now. They’re mostly books now that I notice it (and I admit I did open my good reads to remember what I’ve read lmao)