#HRT George? you get it

[r0semultiverse]

So I guess Finster isn’t exactly Femming George & isn’t as much of a statistical outlier as he thought he was maybe initially. Neat! 💜

[michaelmilkers]

in 2004 george w bush won the presidential election and promised in his acceptance speech to codify a federal ban on gay marriage. 30 states passed bans on gay marriage in the wake of his re-election. and then they fell. one by one by one. it has to get worse before it gets better.

queers. trans people especially. our attitude for the next decade has to be “we’re not fucking scared of you”. do you understand? this has always been at the core of who we are and what we do. we fucking move. we take up space or carve out our own with our bare hands. we take care of us.

do you know the other queers in your neighborhood? do you know who you can call at a bad time? do you know whose house you can crash at? do you know where you can go for a free meal? do you know where you can bring meals to the hungry? do you know the LGBT resources available in your area? do you know the informed consent clinics in your area?

do you know how DIY HRT works? do you know and have friends who don’t? do you know our history? have you read the works of james baldwin and leslie feinberg? are you equipped with knowledge about the forces that work against us? do you understand dialectical materialism? do you know what to say if stopped by the police? do you know what good opsec is? are your legal documents in order? do you know how to get them in order?

scream, cry, rot in your bed, do whatever you need to do to process this, then find something to do. do not fall into despair. in the face of extermination say “fuck you.”

[torrentialstardust]

UMINEKO OCS: PUMPKINPOD AND CHERAKNID

Lots of words and doodles this week, not so much polished work. If you don't wanna read this all, totally understandable. This was very fun, though.

Pumpkinpod and Cheraknid are spirits from the Coven of Weavers, who create grand tapestries of possible futures, providing prophecies and warnings to those who will listen. Many witches call upon them to aid in their planning. In the context of a board game like Rokkenjima, they can weave possibilities for solutions by using the Blue Truth and the Orange.

The Orange Truth is a truth on par with the Blue, but is designed solely to deny it. By having a coloured truth present, it pressures others to come up with a solution that accounts for it. This is especially useful in games where the Game Master is reluctant to give out Red Truth, functioning as a reasoning aid.

Pumpkinpod (It/They) and Cheraknid (They/It) (named by our beloved @junepop45) are partners who originate from one singular spider: Gyorg, the Weaver of Fear. Pumpkinpod is more stoic, choosing to deny premises with the Orange, whereas Cheraknid is more energetic, determined to come up with the most outlandish reasoning to work around it. Neither of the two are male or female, but according to them, they are still opposite genders.

When the possibilities have been exhausted, Pumpkinpod removes its large cloak, showing its crimson red heart, and it is finally revealed which Orange Truths were in fact real. It is unknown if the Red Truth is something Pumpkinpod always possesses, or if it is attained through "real world" revelation. It's best to treat it as if both possibilities are true while it remains unclear.

This is my plushie I got from TeeTurtle after finishing my uni course: Gyorg! I named them after Spiders Georg, and that one Zelda boss "Gyorg". It's pronounced with a hard "G", rather than like "George" is pronounced. I came up with the idea for a stand-in Red Truth and even the furniture with opposite but still non-binary genders around game 4, when Beato wasn't using the Red so much. It's just taken me a while to draw out the ocs. Tbh I still think they could use more detail and paraphernalia. If you end up drawing them, do go wild with headcanonny accessories and designs.

I also took the time to draw my witchsona again, I love how imagining myself as her makes me feel. I actually managed to get a payment through for HRT this week! Once again, if anyone wants to help me cover the costs, comms are open. That stuff was... not cheap.

I'm still not sure what to do about the remaining drawings. I might wanna start on a couple plot sensitive drawings and try and get them done quickly, then move onto drawing people's OCs so if it rolls over into our Higurashi reading, it's not bad for newcomers. Anyhoo, I'm excited for the beginning of the end tonight! Much love as always to you all.

[spookfished]

finished umineko ep 3!!!! on to the tea party :3 reposting the liveblog that i typed on my phone:

[when battler is fighting eva] but even so hes including beato + checking back in on her all thr time..

its pretty obvious that kyrie is intending to corner hideyoshi. hes pretty suspicious

and the proof is her gun!! they had an extra gun!!

haha beato searching for proof implicitly shows that theres a non magical explanation fir all Her stuff too

..a smoke break is a less interesting explanation. tbh

omg i was right!! but they took so long to get there. beaattler u are stupid

Georges murder here is still a bit of a loose end though not what i expected lol. well nanjo could have also killed himself from the guilt . having a kid blinded in front of you kinda sucks

omg chimp theory referenced!!!! no way

the "golden seed" gave beatrice hrt? hrt from choosing kindness?

even the golden land is still on the island.. ohtori high moment

lol eva hiiighkey defanged. a little weird

the golden land is like a co-op (everyone has to agree)

beabato squabble…

even though it seems like beatrice owns the golden land even she has to be invited..

virgilia open eyes? what a doozy

ange!!!!! ange!!!! ange!!!!!

virgilia joining in is pretty surprising huh. like beatrice turning against i would understand but virgilia? no way

ohhh beatrice what r u hiding. the hesitation ehen battler asked… it looks like sentimental sob stories dont suit me..

yes her favorite toy that shell never throw away : flushed

ange says its useless too!!!!! no way!!!

woah…. lonely and jealous ange….

[ganymedeaguspluto]

every election we the Online Left have the same conversation about voting, and whether we should vote, so i'm going to lay out my thoughts on it and then link here next time i get into a fight. gonna try to positively present the most compelling reasons behind voting, and then the most compelling reasons why not to, and then just for fun i'm gonna say why one of the common reasons given for not voting is bad and people should stop using it.

full disclosure: i'm an anarchist, and i choose not to vote in most elections. i have voted in the past once.

here are the most compelling reasons to vote:

1. harm reduction

...which on an abstract level i completely understand. i can only speak for a UK context, but given the threat posed by the Tories and how much damage they would cause by being in power again, i empathise with the "lesser of two evils; we don't like Labour but gotta get the Tories out" mentality. it makes sense, and while i dont think that "vote for the marginally less evil party to get the very evil party out" is a particularly good way to do politics, i understand the impulse.

2. representation in government

having more trans or disabled MPs, or MPs of colour, would be cool. this is undeniable. having these voices in our houses of power might even mean that the UK might become less horribly transphobic, disablist, or racist. might

3. more power to small/fringe left parties

okay, dont vote for a big party like Labour: instead, you should vote for the Socialists! ignoring that basically every trotskyist/communist organisation in the UK is practically a cult and some people have legit trauma from their past membership, more voice to small left parties would theoretically be a good thing: when the SSP had representation in the Scottish Parliament they got free prescriptions. that's cool. it doesnt intersect very well with point #1, but that's okay.

4. spoil your ballot

i've done this before and it was fun. i wrote "trans liberation now!" on my ballot paper and submitted it. it was cool. i felt very sexy leaving my booth

most compelling reasons not to vote

1. is it harm reduction tho, really?

take a second with me and look at the negatives of both major parties. the Labour party are, as well as the Tories, a party of political transphobia, of supporting the ongoing genocide in Gaza, of institutional racism, of increased policing, and market-friendly, austerity producing policies. i'm not saying that they're equally as bad, but for the most marginalised in our society, there is no harm reduction, merely a change of ribbon. to a trans woman fired from her workplace or harassed out of a bathroom, or a black teenager beat up by police, or the people of Gaza, does it matter whether the government is red or blue? the effect is the same

2. a vote for any party is a vote against my existence

i'm transgender. i'm not going to vote for a party that is either actively transphobic or would be willing to sell out their commitment to trans people at the faintest whiff of power. i'm actually offended that someone would ask me to hold my nose and vote against my own existence. unfortunately this leaves me with the Lib Dems, who i havent forgiven for 2010 yet

3. fuck the state

this only appeals to anarchists, but if you dont think the state should exist imo you shouldnt actively be lending it legitimacy by participating in its power-rituals

4. more power to small/fringe left parties

my options here are the cult, the Transphobia Party, the Antisemitism Party, or the Transphobic and Antisemitic Cult (George Galloway's latest venture). the fringe statist left suuuuuuucks. fuck those guys

5. there are better things to do with your time

there will most likely be evictions on election day. go prevent those from taking place. then go talk and cook with your neighbours, set up an employee-only groupchat at work, donate to a food bank, write a poem, and bulk order HRT with your trans friends. refuse to delegate care to someone else and take it into your own hands: be impactful and helpful to yourself and those around you - it does a lot more than voting will. maybe once you've done all that then you can go cast a ballot if you really want to

bad reasons not to vote

1. the parties are the same!

no they're not. both are bad; one is worse. not a reason to vote - if you vote Labour you aren't an ally to trans people - but this is a weak argument

conclusion

i dont vote, or at least won't in 2024. i dont think that "harm reduction" is a compelling enough reason to cast a ballot against myself and my communities, and also amn't a big fan of the state. rant over: im going to sleep

[flightlessapollo]

Trans JoJo's JJBA HCs

So turns out I will be doing those posts about the JoJo's and their genderqueer identities. Suppose I'll be going in order here, enjoy <3

(This is a long one so it's going under the cut)

Jonathan Joestar- I feel like Jonathan isn't trans, but if he knew his descendants were trans (after it was explained to him cuz he was around in the 1880s), he would be incredibly supportive. If anyone is trans in part 1 I feel like it would be Speedwagon, maybe I'll go into gender hcs for the Jobros/villains at a later date. Regardless, Jonathan is cis and a sweetie.

George (Jorge? idk) Joestar II- Honestly I can't really speak on this one, I haven't read his spinoff and I know nothing about him. If I had to guess I would say he's most likely cis but I really don't know.

Joseph Joestar- Now we get into the gender-diverse side of this bloodline. I feel like Joseph is AMAB but has a slight bit of a transfem nonbinary identity. Like he doesn't feel fully like a man but he also doesn't align fully with "woman" either and so he's kind of an in-between and he's very comfortable with that. Like she's a he/she type of person and feels very comfortable being gnc in all ways. Joseph really just plays around with gender and doesn't care what you call that, he's just living his life to its fullest.

Holy Kujo- Another cis Joestar who I feel would be incredibly supportive. She knows her parent is nonbinary and has a fluid identity so when her son came out she gave him a huge hug and told him she would love and support him in being his authentic self. She's also very supportive of her granddaughter of course and after working through the complicated feelings around learning she has a brother, she's supportive of Josuke as well. An ally through and through.

Jotaro Kujo- Jotaro is a binary trans man and he's quite happy with that. Though he does enjoy skirts and heels, he strictly wears those privately. He realized he was a boy very young and came out young as well. Though of course, he won't admit it he's a bookworm and found out what being transgender (a different term was used when he was growing up in the 80s but I don't feel comfortable using it) was when he was young and realized it aligned with his experience of himself. His coming out was a very easy process, his mom being so supportive. It was made even easier because he came out during the period of his life when he and his mother had a very good relationship. A he/him guy, he bound until he was 18, at the age of 18 he was able to get on hrt and get top surgery through the Speedwagon Foundation; he never pursued bottom surgery. His wife was a trans woman and he was the one who gave birth to Jolyne.

Josuke Higashikata(4)- Josuke is another binary trans man, though he feels more connected to his femininity than his nephew gender-wise. I think it's obvious they're quite gnc and they feel very comfortable playing with gender much in the same way their parent does/did. He realized his gender identity a bit older than his nephew, in his early teens. Josuke is okay with he/they pronouns and often expresses his gender in a very gnc way. He wasn't a huge fan of binding so he very often didn't do it, though he did deal with top dysphoria. They were fortunate after meeting the other side of their family and were able to get hormones at 16 and top surgery at 18. He waited until he was a good few years older to pursue any kind of bottom surgery, and got meta in his late 20s.

Giorno Giovanna- Another AMAB Joestar. They were gender nonconforming from a young age and as a teen they came out as nonbinary to their very close friends, though his identity didn't have much relevance to his work as the head of Passione. Nothing really hugely changed for her and she didn't do any medical transition. Socially, again he kept his gender to his close friends but used it to his advantage to ensure his safety. Often any pronouns were used for them in situations where revealing any info on the boss would put her in danger. Giorno is okay with any pronouns and their friends tend to default to they/them, which they don't mind. They continued to play with gender expression as they got older, enjoying the joy it brought them to toy with expression and gender roles.

Jolyne Kujo(Cujoh?)- Jolyne is a trans woman who knew about her identity and was firm about it from a very young age. As a child she expressed that she was a girl and her parents, both being trans themselves, we're supportive of that identity. She grew up as any typical girl would, her parents helping her change her legal documents and get her on puberty blockers before AMAB puberty began for her. She started hrt at 15 and didn't pursue any surgeries for transition but did get some professional voice training for a few years to help warm her voice and mature it. Jolyne gives she/her as an answer when asked her pronouns but doesn't mind if people (especially close friends) use they/them. She has a large interest in fashion and while not entirely gnc, she has always enjoyed finding her own unique style of what gender means to her.

Jonathan "Johnny" Joestar- This one is tough and still one I'm kind of thinking through (I plan to reread SBR so I think my opinion with crystalize when I do that) what exactly I think. He could just be cis, or he couldn't and I really don't know that i have a strong feeling either way? I get a trans sort of vibe from him but unlike all other Joestars who give me that vibe I can't pin down why. If he is trans he definitely binds but wouldn't have access to any other type of transitional care obviously due to the time period he lived in.

Josuke Higashikata (8)- Well his situation is confusing isn't it? I suppose the thing to do here is look at Josefumi and Yoshikage? Or perhaps not because Josuke is his own person (wasn't that like an important piece of his story? Forgive me folks I didn't understand all of Jojolion and haven't really touched it since it finished so-) so, perhaps Josefumi or Yoshikage were trans, but I don't think we get enough time with them to be sure. And based on Josuke alone i feel he isn't trans. Ofc in the manga we know he has AMAB anatomy but even disregarding that i just do not really feel a trans pull from him. He's certainly an ally though. Especially since I do feel Yasuho is trans and since I ship her and Josuke, she definitely wouldn't be dating a transphobe.

And yeah! There's that. Really really long and shit. Um. If you read all the way to this point ily man cuz this was just a bunch of silly nonsense that just lives in my brain. Hope at least some part of it interested you.

Final note: These are all just headcanons of mine, don't take them too seriously.

[cloudslexapro]

Duke for character bingo

duke is such a wild character for me because 90% of their character is completely made up in my head. they're nonbinary, they're transfem, they've been on HRT and had FFS, they're really superstitious and believe in ghosts and they're into wicca, they are a power lesbian, they get their way through sex, they have an eating disorder, they're five feet tall and they cook chinese and italian food expertly, they're vegetarian, they have pet ferrets they dress up in little outfits, they game with yugi online weekly, they would kill for tristan taylor. my insane head canons about this character never end. but mainly its really hard to engage with fandom about them especially fic because i can't stand he pronouns for duke (this is my own issue and no one else's lol) and people don't often give them more depth than like, a playboy. and im like yes but what else??? i think they're more of a mess than they ever like to let on. duke is like, goth regina george but also a huge nerd. i think they take a long time to feel like part of the friendship gang, bc yugi forgives quickly but everyone else is like are you serious?? and then duke dates half the friend group. they're chaotic. they're slutty. they have body image issues. they're my baby. tbh.

[grackles-hoard]

Men pretending to be women for autogynephilia or mental illness reasons is absurd and biologically impossible and also harmful. Lol. Echo chamber much?

https://www.lawsociety.ie/gazette/top-stories/2021/12-december/ex-inmate-gives-account-of-sex-assault-by-trans-prisoner

https://www.kxii.com/content/news/Transgender-woman-allegedly-sexually-assaults-teen-in-walmart-505820451.html

https://amp.theguardian.com/society/2021/jul/02/trans-women-with-sex-offence-convictions-in-female-jails-lawful-rules-judge

https://nypost.com/2022/04/25/transgender-rikers-inmate-gets-7-years-for-raping-female-prisoner/amp/

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-11458335/Male-female-Trans-inmates-drive-rising-numbers-rapes-abuse-womens-prisons.html

https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-england-leicestershire-63785679.amp

https://wset.com/amp/news/nation-world/la-da-blasted-for-charging-26-year-old-trans-women-as-juvenile-in-sex-assault-of-minor-los-angeles-california-george-gascon

https://www.womensforumaustralia.org/rape_victim_fights_back_after_a_trans_identified_male_was_given

https://www.usatoday.com/story/opinion/voices/2021/10/29/trans-bathroom-policy-sexual-assault/8568005002/

Hi! I see you are continuing to try to excuse your hateful behavior!

The argument you made (and I responded to) was that natal sex and gender cannot be changed, thus trans people are invalid.

Let's dive into the links you sent me and examine each article and their content!

The first link you sent me is from the news website 'Law Society Gazette Ireland', and the article is titled 'Female inmate tells of sex assault by trans prisoner' published January 18, 2022. The article is about sex predator Karen White being sent to an all female prison based on self identification as a woman, despite never having undergone surgery or HRT. White was convicted for grievous bodily harm, multiple rape, and other sexual offences against women. In the case to place White into a female prison, the previous crimes were not taken into account. The Ministry of Justice even says they did not take the previous crimes into account.

One of the offended women, Cheryle Kempton, tells the reporter that she believes White faked being transgender to prey on vulnerable women.

Now that we have touched on the articles content, let's go through why this is not a credible source for your argument.

This article is about a sex predator; which does not connect to the argument you are making.

The article states that the previous crimes of White were not taken into consideration when placing the criminal in a female prison. This could be used for the argument of prison safety, but that is not the argument you are making.

The article uses a survivor of the assault in the report, who makes no action to condemn trans people. Kempton tells the reporter that she believes that White faked being trans to prey on fellow inmates and took advantage of the laws allowing those who identify as trans women to serve time in female prisons. Kempton does not go on to say anything supporting your original argument.

2. The second link is to another news website 'kxii.com', and the article is titled 'Transgender woman arrested accused of sexually assaulting teen in Walmart bathroom' published February 13, 2019. The article is about a 31 y/o Ojeda sexually assaulting a 16 y/o in a Walmart bathroom. Ojeda is facing sexual battery charge, and may face a charge of obstruction for withholding possible evidence, should Ojeda be convicted.

Now that we have touched on the articles content, let's go through why this is not a credible source for your argument.

This article's URL ends in a '.com'. This stands for commercial, and thus, does not meet the criteria for being a credible source for any argument.

This article has no links to verifiable, current evidence. Reputable news articles usually link their sources within the paragraphs and the links should take the reader to the main source of information, which itself should also be a reliable source.

This article talks about sexual assault, and does not support your original argument.

3. The third link is to another news website 'The Guardian', and the article is titled 'Lawful to imprison trans women sex offenders in female jails, judge rules', amended July 2, 2021. The article is very much like the first article you sent me, which talks about sexual assault by MTF peoples in female prisons. It discusses the fine line of safety and respect for both MTF inmates and ciswomen inmates. Lord Justice Holroyde reports in the article; " said the statistics were too low and had insufficient detail to provide a safe basis for conclusions, adding: “I can accept, at any rate for present purposes, that the unconditional introduction of a transgender woman into the general population of a women’s prison carries a statistically greater risk of sexual assault upon non-transgender prisoners than would be the case if a non-transgender woman were introduced. But that statistical conclusion takes no account of the risk assessment which the policies require.”"

Now that we have touched on the articles content, let's go through why this is not a credible source for your argument.

This article talks about sexual assault, and does not support your original argument. This could be used for the argument of prison safety, but that is not the argument you are making.

The article's website 'The Guardian' is not peer reviewed, and ends in a commercial web address, and thus, does not meet the criteria for being a credible source for any argument.

The article's website 'The Guardian', is held in high regards to providing well informed news, however, 'The Guardian' tends to leans to a left-wing bias, and thus, without you providing a counter bias, makes this uncredible.

4.-9. These next articles you have sent me link more news websites, all with commercial web addresses. I have read over each of them, and to save us some time, I will go through why these are not credible sources for your argument.

Many (if not all) of these articles talk about sexual assault, and does not support your original argument. This could be used for the argument of prison safety, but that is not the argument you are making.

Many (if not all) of these articles does not provide a creditable source/link for their articles.

The last link has 'opinion' in its URL, making is not factual information, liable to bias, and not creditable.

Again, you are in no position to tell someone (who is not harming you or others) that their experiences are incorrect. It is not a burden to be kind, I can assure you.

I am in no control of you or your displeasure for any trans person, I never claimed to be. I am, however, in control of myself, unlike you. Your frustration and hate towards me is not deserved, I have said nothing to slight you or to berate you.

Once again, I hope you learn kindness :)

[mlm-blues]

💛🌱🏳️‍🌈

💛 who or what made you realize you were queer?

i very strongly related to george from the famous five when i was younger. wanting to have a boy's name, dressing like a boy, doing 'boys' activities, etc.

and also that little channel 4 interview that noah finnce was in (back in 2017 or 2018??) was on tv and i watched it then checked out his channel and found out i could get my tits chopped off and start hrt and i was like oooh this is sooo me

🌱 how would your younger self act if your current self told them they were queer?

probably not very shocked. mainly bc of pretty much kinning george from the famous five since i was 6 years old and i had always wanted my hair to be short like my brother's and i want to look like my brother and be like my brother and why am i not my brother actually. hmm

🏳️‍🌈 do you enjoy the colors of your preferred flag? do you incorporate it into your outfits, decor, etc.?

i do like the colours of my flags. i dont really incorporate them into anything, unless you count the amount of blue stuff i wear. because in that case, i am always dressed as the toothpaste mlm flag 👍🏽

[cynicalone94]

Hostage Situation

Read on AO3 here.

Jay gets out of the car, looking over the house.

“Why don’t you go around back?” Al suggests.

He nods, ghosting around behind the building to take a post by the back door.

“In position.”

Thirty seconds later a loud boom shakes the building.

“Al? You okay?”

No response.

“Al?”

He jogs around the building, seeing smoke billowing up from the blasted out front door.

But his partner isn’t lying on the grass like he would have expected.

“Al!” he shouts, lifting his radio. “5021 George. I need Bomb Squad and CFD at 1641 W Bellview Avenue. Explosion, possible additional explosives, possible fire.”

He spots a drag pattern, coated with blood, across the grass toward the front door. Drawing his weapon, he starts to move toward the front door.

He gets close, sees Al lying on the floor with his eyes closed and then a man is stepping into his face with a weapon raised.

Another man behind him has a weapon pointed at Al’s head.

“Who are you?” he demands.

“Not important Detective.” the man says. “We’ve got some demands but I’m guessing you aren’t the man to help with that so why don’t you get your ass back and get ahold of someone who can.”

“Okay.” Jay says, stepping back and holstering his weapon. “Okay. But I need to know what kind of condition my guy is in.”

“He’s alive.” the man tells him. “That’s all you need to know.”

Jay shakes his head, taking another step back and peering past the man.

“I need stable enough to wait.” he presses. “Or SWAT will be hitting this door full blast and soon.”

The man takes a small step to the side, motioning him forward. As he reaches the threshold, a gun settles against the side of his head.

There’s blood on the side of Al’s head, burns scattered across his face and chest and his right leg is bleeding heavily from some kind of puncture wound.

Reluctantly, Jay steps back.

Al will hold for a minute. He needs to get the rest of the cavalry rolling before he does anything crazy.

He steps back, nodding stiffly to the man next to him and then retreating down the steps.

“5021 George. Need an HRT team at my location. I have an officer down, being held hostage. Need paramedics on standby.”

He pulls out his phone, hitting a speed dial.

“Voight. We have a situation.”

“Yeah, I’m hearing the calls over the wire. We’re on the way there. Where’s Al?”

“In the house.” Jay says. “Front door blew, probably when he knocked. He’s hurt but they wouldn’t let me in the house.”

“They tell you about demands?” Voight asks.

“He wouldn’t tell me.” Jay says. “Wanted someone with more authority.”

“Alright.” Voight agrees. “Don’t do anything stupid.”

“I have to Sarge.” Jay says.

“Halstead.”

“Al’s leg is bleeding bad and with the head injury, he can’t get the tourniquet on himself.” Jay argues. “I have to get in there.”

“Jay.”

“Al needs me to do something stupid.” he says, hanging up the phone.

He jogs back to the truck, stripping the rest of his gear, locking his gun in his safe and grabbing the first aid kit.

Then he heads back up to the door. The men have pushed a bookshelf across the door frame.

“Hey.” he shouts, banging on the back of it.

“If you ain’t brought a negotiator, I don’t want to hear it!” the guy shouts back.

“Yeah. You really do.” Jay says. “Cause my guy in there is losing a lot of blood and if you don’t let me come in and provide aid then what I was saying earlier about SWAT is still gonna be your problem. And I probably won’t like how it ends up but I promise you that you won’t either.”

He stands there, listening while they debate for a moment.

“It’s either me with no weapon, just a first aid kit or an entire SWAT team.” Jay calls back. “And you’re running out of time.”

The bookshelf slides aside just enough to allow Jay to squeeze into the house.

He stands, hands up while they pat him down.

Al’s head falls toward him, eyes blinking sluggishly and its almost impossible to wait for the men to give him the go ahead before dropping to his knees.

He slips the tourniquet around his friend’s thigh, tightening it down and then starting to twist the windlass rod.

Al groans but he doesn’t stop.

“Sorry man.” he whispers. “I gotta do this.”

Once he’s got it as tight as he needs, he locks it into place. Then he shifts his attention to Al’s head.

He checks pupil response with the penlight in the kit and then uses wipes to clean up some of the blood so he can get a look at the gash.

“You know we’re on a time limit with this tourniquet.” he comments as he works. “If they don’t get him to the hospital soon, he might lose the leg.”

It isn’t really true. They’ve learned in the Middle East that blood flow can be re-established and the limb saved after as much as twenty four hours.

But these assholes don’t need to know that.

“We aren’t letting him go.” the man snaps behind him.

“Why not?” Jay asks, turning to look the man in the eye. “I’m here. You’ve still got a hostage to get whatever it is that you want. Let me get him some help.”

The man stares back, gritting his teeth and then nodding.

“Move the shelf.” he orders his friend.

Two more men, one of them the target that they’d been here to arrest, walk into the room at the front of the house, hefting rifles.

The second man that’s he’s been talking to glares at him and then moves, pushing the bookshelf out of the way.

Jay reluctantly hooks Al under the arms, dragging him toward the door.

A gun settles against his head again and he tries to ignore it. He gets Al onto the porch and then sirens are filling the air.

“Drop him.” the man covering him orders, digging the gun into his skull.

He lowers Al to the porch, raising his hands.

“Back inside.”

“Okay. Okay.” Jay says, taking a step back.

Before he can even think about starting a fight, a gun goes off nearby and he looks down in horror to see a bullet hole in the wood of the porch next to Al’s head.

“Don’t you try anything.” the man hisses in his ear.

Jay looks up at the sea of lights turning the corner and then backs into the house.

The bookshelf is pushed back across the door.

“Hands behind your back.”

Jay moves his hands into place.

“My name is Jay Halstead.” he says, making eye contact with the man who is obviously in charge and trying to ignore the movement that he can feel behind him. “Is there something I can call you?”

“You can call me shut the hell up.” the man snaps.

He offers a single nod, looking down.

Zip ties are slid over his wrists and pulled tight.

At least Al is going to be okay.

HRT is already on scene when Voight pulls up. He hurries toward the command vehicle but stops when he sees activity at the rear of the ambulance.

Moving that way, he sees Al lying on a stretcher while two paramedics work on him.

“He okay?” he asks.

“I think he will be.” Sylvie tells him. “But whoever applied this tourniquet saved his life. He would have bled out otherwise.”

Which explains why Jay had been so insistent on doing something stupid.

He pats Al’s arm, nodding to Sylvie and then continuing toward the command vehicle.

“Commander Hixson.” he says, climbing in to the back. “We made contact yet?”

“I’ve been calling your Detective’s phone. It’s not in his truck with the rest of his gear so we can only assume it’s on his person. They haven’t answered yet.” Hixson answers. “Olinsky going to be okay?”

“The paramedics think so.” Voight says.

“What can you tell me about what they were here for?”

“Tyler Michels.” Voight tells him. “Person of interest in a drug case Intelligence is working. Halstead and Olinsky were here to pick him up.”

“Any ideas on demands?”

“When I talked to Halstead he said they had something in mind but wanted to wait for someone with more authority.” Voight says. “So I’m guessing they’ll pick up that call before too much longer.”

“We’ll keep try –”

“Commander they picked up.” one of the techs calls and he steps back, sliding the handset over his head.

“This is Commander Jason Hixson of the Chicago Police Department.” he says. “Who am I speaking to?”

“You can call me Tony.” the man says. “There is a flash drive that was taken into evidence by the Intelligence team. I want it back. Along with two million dollars in cash and safe passage.”

“Alright.” Hixson says. “We can work on that. I’d like to speak to Detective Halstead.”

“Maybe later.” Tony says. “I’ll let you get to work.”

The line goes dead.

“What can you tell me about the flash drive?” Hixson asks.

“We pulled it off a body yesterday.” Voight says. “Tech didn’t get anything other than gibberish off it.”

“Encrypted.” Hixson says and Voight nods.

“I’ll call someone on my team.” he says. “Get it brought over.”

“I’ll put in the request for the 1505 funds.” Hixon agrees. “We’ll get him out of there.”

Voight nods.

Jay watches as Tony hangs up the phone.

He’s on his knees, a gun to the back of his head in case he gets any ideas about trying to participate in the phone call.

Tony turns and walks toward him.

“We’ll need to provide proof of life next time they call.” he tells the others. “Let’s get him ready.”

Ready?

Tyler grabs his arm and tows him to his feet. He’s led deeper into the house to where a hallway runs along the stairs.

He’s shoved up onto a step stool. Hears one of the men running up the stairs.

“What the hell is this?” he demands.

His wrists are cut free and his arms shoved up above his head. The man on the stairs reaches down to continue pulling them up, re-securing them around the railing using rope this time.

“See those X’s on the wall?” Tony asks, pointing to the wall across from him where ten x’s have been marked on the wall with painter’s tape.

“Yeah.” he says slowly.

Tony steps back out of the hallway, holding up a small remote.

“When I press a button.” the man says with a smirk, pressing the button.

The explosion is a hundred times smaller than the one that had thrown Al down the front steps and across the lawn but it still sends shrapnel, wood fragments of various sizes, flying toward him.

Several of them embed themselves in him and he grimaces, twisting his wrists in the loops of rope.

“A couple of the charges are bigger than that.” the man tells him, stepping back into the hall. “If the negotiators get me what I need quickly, you might not have to feel any of those. But for now, you can just hang out.”

Then he’s kicking the stool out from under Jay’s feet and all of his weight abruptly drops onto his wrists.

He cries out as he feels something crack but locks his jaw, biting off any sound.

And then he’s left alone.

He doesn’t know how long he hangs there before Tony comes back around the corner with his phone in hand.

“Why don’t you tell Commander Hixson that you’re still alive.” he says, holding it up.

Jay can see the SWAT team leader on the screen, Voight hovering behind him.

“I’m fine.” he says. “Al okay?”

“Detective Olinsky is expected to make a full recovery.” Hixson tells him. “Have they hurt you?”

Tony holds up the remote and Jay can’t help but grimace.

Another charge goes off. It’s one of the larger ones that Tony had mentioned earlier and sends much larger shrapnel flying his way.

One particularly large scrap of wood embeds itself in his leg and he winces but manages not to cry out.

“You have three hours to get me my money.” Tony says. “For every twenty minutes that you do not, a charge will be detonated and Detective Halstead risks being injured. Should you reach the three hour mark without my demands being met, I will detonate one final charge placed in the wall behind your Detective. I can assure you, he will not survive its detonation.”

He ends the call before they can say anything, turning his attention back to Jay.

“That one got you good didn’t it?” he says with a chuckle as he examines the wood sticking out of Jay’s leg and the blood seeping into his pants.

“This isn’t a good idea.” Jay says. “You’re just asking for them to abandon negotiations and turn to a tactical answer.”

“If they do.” Tony says, glaring at him. “I’ll detonate that last charge and kill you.”

“And you’ll get nothing.” Jay snaps.

“See you in eighteen minutes.” Tony says, patting his cheek condescendingly.

Over the next two hours, another six charges are detonated.

For the most part they’ve been small, littering Jay’s frame with small cuts and scrapes.

But the last one, the eighth overall, sends another large shard that catches him in the chest, driving deep into his skin at the base of his ribs.

Jay can’t help but scream as it impacts, yanking hard against the ropes securing his wrists as he attempt to cover the injury.

Tony paces closer, holding the phone up to make sure the negotiator can see the injury.

“Oh that’s not good, huh?” he says, not sounding worried. “Seems like you might need to pick up the pace on my money, Commander. How long do you think he’ll last like this?”

Jay swings up slightly, kicking the phone out of the man’s hand.

Both pieces of wood that have made themselves home in his body are jostled by the movement and he gasps, closing his eyes as he tries to breathe through the pain.

Tony gets right up in his face, hand closing around his throat.

“Bet you think you’re real tough, don’t you?” he hisses.

Jay couldn’t answer if he wanted to; gasping and choking for air. Searing pain is shooting through his torso and he’s pretty sure the man has jostled the wood, probably accelerating the bleeding.

He can hear Hixson’s voice from his phone, the man shouting for Tony to return to the conversation.

“You are a hostage.” Tony hisses. “Your job is to shut the hell up and wait to see if you get to go home alive today.”

His head is slammed back against the wall and then Tony lets go and walks over to pick up the phone.

“My apologies for the distraction.” he says. “The detective and I had something to discuss.”

He faces the screen back toward Jay so the negotiator can see that he’s still alive and relatively intact.

Jay’s head is hanging low to his chest but he forces it up to look at them.

“We’ll be back in, oh about ten minutes.” Tony says, smirking at him and ending the call.

It can’t be more than five minutes before a loud crash echoes through the house and Tony scrambles for his remote, hitting a button.

Nothing happens.

He curses and hits it again and then again and then armored SWAT officers are rounding the corner and knocking it out of his hand.

As he’s taken into custody, Voight appears and rushes up to Jay.

“Easy kid.” he says as Jay tugs on the ropes. “We’ll get you down. How you doing?”

“Tired.” Jay says as Hixson rights the stool and slides it back under his feet, taking the weight off his arms.

Voight reaches up with a knife, cutting the ropes. Jay tries to stay upright but instantly collapses forward.

“Woah.” Voight says, dropping the knife and catching him. “I got you.”

“He’s lost a lot of blood.” Hixson comments as he helps him lower Jay to the ground. “I’ll get a tourniquet on his leg.”

“Al really okay?” Jay asks.

“Got out of surgery five minutes ago.” Voight tells him. “Already chewed out a nurse.”

Jay cracks a smile and Voight looks down, tearing the younger man’s shirt open to get a look at his injury.

“Sorry I was stupid.”

“It’s okay.” Voight tells him. “Sylvie says you probably saved Al’s life so I guess you were right, he did need you to be stupid.”

“What about Sylvie?” a voice says and Voight looks up to see the paramedics hurrying up.

“Just telling him you said he did good with that tourniquet.” Voight says.

“Really good.” Sylvie agrees. “Now lets get you taken care of, huh?”

Jay’s eyes slip closed. Voight is quick to order him to open them and he tries but he can’t seem to fight the pull of the darkness.

He wakes up to beeping.

He’s really tired of the beeping. Maybe next time he gets hurt Will can silence the monitors. They work just as well without broadcasting his heart rate to the whole room, right?

Will would probably just tell him not to get hurt again if he doesn’t want to hear the beeping.

He pries his eyes open, looking down to see red hair on the mattress.

“Will.” he croaks, shocked by how weak his own voice sounds.

His brother shoots upright, staring at him with wide eyes.

“Jay.” he manages after a moment. “Hey. You’re awake.”

“Yeah.” he says. “Can I…”

Will is already picking up a glass of water and bringing the straw to his lips.

He takes a few sips before dropping his head back.

“Thanks.”

Will glances at his watch before grabbing his phone.

“Al doing okay?” Jay asks.

“Chomping at the bit to get out of here.” Will says with a smile as he types something. “Actually you have good timing. They’re just getting ready to sign him out. I’m texting Voight to let him know you’re awake so they can stop by on their way out.”

“How long was I out?” Jay asks.

“It’s been a little over two days.” Will says, setting his phone aside and reaching up to brush his fingers through Jay’s hair. “I was starting to get worried.”

“Sorry.” Jay whispers.

“It’s okay.” Will tells him. “You lost a lot of blood.”

“He… he moved the one in my stomach.” Jay says.

“Yeah.” Will agrees. “Marcel said it looked like the wood had been moved around. Didn’t help that it hit your liver. But they patched everything up, last transfusion started an hour ago so you’re going to be okay. Just need to rest.”

Jay nods.

A wheelchair rounds the corner and he looks up to see Voight pushing Al into his room.

“Hey guys.”

“Good to see you awake, kid.” Al says looking him over. “So what’s up? You can’t let someone else have the hospital stay for once?”

Jay grins tiredly.

“You know me.” he says. “Don’t like to share the attention.”

Al chuckles.

“Thanks kid.” he says, reaching out to squeeze Jay’s arm.

“Anytime.” Jay says seriously.

“Well I’d appreciate it if you could both avoid explosions for a few weeks.” Voight chimes in and Will nods.

“Amen to that.”

Jay and Al roll their eyes.

“Brothers.” Jay retorts and Al chuckles.

“I need to get this one home.” Voight says, shaking his head at them. “Get some rest, Jay.”

Jay nods, offering a wave as they leave. And then Will is brushing his fingers through his hair again.

“Go back to sleep, Jay.” he says softly. “I’ll be here when you wake up.”

He’s exhausted and his brother’s ministrations are soothing so Jay doesn’t argue, closing his eyes and letting himself drift back to dreamland.

[rotationalsymmetry]

I’m going to try again (cw general discussion of rape, murder, anti black violence.)

Being against rape and being against prisons are not in any sense in opposition to each other. Both are based on valuing bodily autonomy and being opposed to suffering and in favor of people generally being safe and happy.

It’s important to realize that the vast majority of rape isn’t the sort of thing the criminal justice system is particularly helpful about. A lot of rape cannot possibly be proven not to be consensual sex in court. And a lot of rape is committed by people who have dramatically more power against people with dramatically less power, sometimes by eg police officers or prison guards or soldiers in a country they’re invading, and sometimes against undocumented immigrants and sex workers and disabled people who require high levels of care and other people who really cannot go to the police and expect that to not make things worse for them.

It is also important to realize that there is very much a history of specifically the fear of black men raping white women being used to drive anti-black racism, from lynchings to mass incarceration and cops killing black people. While this is a thing that can happen and it is bad, it is not what the vast majority of rapes look like and it’s not a proportionate response. Rape is bad. But it’s not so overwhelmingly or uniquely bad that it makes killing people somehow not bad, or incarcerating people (which is itself a wrong that is capable of messing up people’s lives on the same order as rape even when it doesn’t include sexual violence itself, which it often does) or creating a culture where young black men grow up consistently seeing people like themselves be portrayed as thugs, as criminals, as predators, as sub-human.

I believe people are people. I believe black lives do in fact matter and need to be valued as much as white lives and are not currently valued as much as white lives. I believe in bodily autonomy and in personal freedom. I believe in prison abolition.

I was raised by liberals and I feel like I should make a plea for moderation here, that anyone reading this who isn’t against letting out murderers should still be with me on letting out people who have done non-violent drug crimes for instance. But…idk, do any of the liberals really want anyone in prison for non-violent drug crimes? And yet that’s what we keep getting. (In the same way that “but teenagers shouldn’t have access to irreversible surgery” gets somehow used to keep them off puberty blockers and 20 year olds off of HRT. And that 20 years ago people who thought that “there should be something for gay couples, just call it civil unions or something, not marriage” kept voting for ballot measures that did in fact also forbid civil unions.) I’m not sure half assed allies are allies at all. I’m not sure we can get any degree of giving cops less money or letting a few more people out of prison unless we face head on this fear of murderers and rapists (for certain definitions of murder and rape) and see the harm that fear does and throw it out entirely and realize that if George Zimmerman and the various cops who have killed black people can walk free, people who have killed people in a way that legally counted as ��murder” can be allowed to walk free too without the fucking world ending. If the white guy who raped me can walk free without the world ending, so can rapists who did something legally recognizable as rape. And you know what? I can be generous. All the cops and prison guards and politicians who voted for mass incarceration and all the people who have done horrifying things in the military and the people who run the companies that make drones and chemical weapons, those can all walk free too. Because depriving people of their liberty is itself violence.

Prison. Abolition. Now.

[danielforshort]

HRT Access in the DMV

I use Whitman Walker in DC

I started testosterone (intramuscular injection) October of 2021 with no insurance. Below are the steps that I went through to get HRT

https://whitmanwalkerimpact.org/institute/  

https://www.whitman-walker.org/  

Become a Patient 

https://www.whitman-walker.org/become-patient/  

View Accepted Insurance 

Don’t have Insurance 

“Our Public Benefits and Insurance Navigation Team will be happy to talk with you about your health insurance options, walk you through enrollment, or answer any of your questions. Call 202.745.6151 to speak with a team member today!”  

Sliding Scale payments 

I called their insurance navigation team to discuss options as I did not have my own insurance plan  

The team member was very friendly and helpful!  

Once I was approved for sliding scale payments, they sent me some forms to fill out, as well as entered me as a new patient on their end. 

I called a couple days later, after I sent in my paperwork, and made my first appointment! They were happy to help me figure out which location was best for my commute as well!  

For my actual first appt they took baseline information (height, weight, blood pressure) and then the doctor came in and asked me what I was in for. 

As soon as I said testosterone they got right to work asking me some questions and providing information about different T options. 

At the end of my appointment I had my blood drawn and had to do a baseline STI panel (this is just a safety precaution)  

They scheduled my next appointment (when I would actually be given a T prescription) ASAP- and it was telehealth!! (It was literally less than 2 weeks later!)  

The day of my appointment the doctor called me and discussed my panels. They gave me my prescription and told me that if I would like to be shown how to do the injections, I could make an appointment with a nurse on site at Whitman Walker. George Mason University might also offer this service for a small fee. (If you’re interested in this I’m happy to demonstrate/have you practice an injection on me!)  

I called the pharmacy and they got my prescription + a kit to do the injections, and arranged free at home delivery.  

I have since acquired my own insurance (Aetna student health) and the switch over process wasn’t hard at all. I see my doctor at Whitman Walker once a year to make sure everything is going well with the testosterone as well as do annual blood work to make sure my levels are good. My doctor and all of Whitman Walker has been pretty easy to work with and I really appreciate them.

I pay about $50 for a 10 month supply of testosterone and $25 for like 150 needles.

I pay about $35 for the annual checkup and blood work.

[hexagon-club]

I have more to add to this. Both of these had their foundations in the early 1950s, the first legally recognised sex change in the US (George William Jorgenson/Christine Jorgenson) was in 1952. And the Church of Scientology was founded in 1954. And despite updating the public face of the ideologies they are both very frozen in the social attitudes of the time.

And that's another thing they both have in common. There is the public face of the ideology, and the "real" beliefs that they don't talk about to outsiders. You don't learn about Xenu in Scientology until you reach Operating Thetan Level 3. At which point you will have already been with the church for a few years. You don't learn the full "truth" until Operating Thetan Level 8, at which point you will have been with the church for decades, and have probably already given them your life savings.

This is really weird. Other religions are pretty open about what they believe. Even if their beliefs seem wacky to outsiders they usually don't let this bother them. But Scientologists are weirdly ashamed of admitting that they follow a faith based belief system. They want to dress it up in this outer shell of secularism and rationality. And they only let the mask slip around people who have proven they can be trusted to keep their secrets.

Can we think of any other faith based belief systems disguised as secular evidence based belief systems?

Obviously the Church of Gender isn't as centralised as the Church of Scientology. So it's a bit harder for them to control the information their members have access to. There's their core mantra of "a woman is anyone who identifies as a woman", which clearly isn't what they actually believe. Because no part of that definition involves dressing a certain way, having a certain set of hormones in your body, or having a certain set of genitalia. So they show by their actions what they really believe a woman is when they change the way they dress, start HRT, and for the most dedicated members of the cult, get genital reassignment surgery.

But I also can't help but also see parallels in terms of how they try to deny people access to accurate information about the medicalisation process. Whether that be about hormones, puberty blockers, or the horrifically high complication rate from the various surgeries.

Or as @auspiciouslyautistic explained.

Again, this is weird, I can't think of any other medical process where people are this reluctant to talk about the negative side effects. But it's this cult mentality where they don't want outsiders, or even lower ranking members of the cult, to know the real truth. It reminds me of how people at lower Operating Thetan levels aren't allowed to know about Xenu.

I'm sure I could add more, but I'm already rambling. idk, all I can say is that if you're going to sacrifice your time, money and health to a cult promising you that it will turn you into something you can't possibly become. It seems like more fun to try and become a psychic ghost alien piloting a human suit who is preparing for war with the Galactic Confederacy. That seems so much cooler than trying to go from being one type of human, to another slightly different sort of human. They are both equally impossible promises, but only one of them seems any fun.

The more I think about it, the more I think the best parallel ideology to transgenderism is scientology. One of them is a wacky and wildly individualist spiritual belief system about how all your problems have to do with how your soul was forcibly placed in the wrong body. And you can only solve those problems by forking over money to a weird priesthood masquerading as intellectuals and health experts, who will help align your body with the vaguely defined and unfalsifiable spirit at its core. All justified with a mid 20th century coat of psuedoscientific paint. The main architect of which was a pedophile. Which later went on to infiltrate the government, academia, and the entertainment industry (especially Hollywood) where it morphed into a weird cross between a sex cult and a pyramid scheme. And even though most people know it is bullshit, its followers are so tenacious, and it's church so well funded, and their abuse of the legal system so well refined that people are simply too intimidated to stand up to them. And people who do dare to defect are mercilessly hounded and intimidated into silence for daring to expose the cults inner workings to the general public.

And the other one is a group of weirdos who worship an alien called Xenu or something.

[demonbanisher]

So I’m gonna do a scary thing and share a poem I wrote that I just read at a show tonight. I’ve had some internal struggles with my place in fandom over the past while, which flairs up when JKR decides to be awful again. As a result, I sometimes feel guilty for existing in this spaces especially as a trans person who is new to their identity and figuring shit out. So I wrote a poem about it and I thought I would share it here in case anyone is feeling the same way. A huge shoutout to @fuckboyregulus for being willing to read it over for me before my show. Definitely gave me that last boost of confidence I needed. TW for JKR and mentions of her TERFness So without further ado, here she is...

A Lesson in Trans-figuration

I see another post that says if you still read, support, or are involved in anything Harry Potter related you’re a transphobe

And I feel that knife twist inside the parts of me that are still learning their name

My transness is still being born, is still an ugly duckling finding its way into a swan

My grip on my identity, on my place in this community is slippery enough and with those words… I fall

Now, when I say I never liked these books to begin with it sounds like a lie

Like I’m trying to justify causing harm to those I hold dear

But it shouldn’t matter, but it does matter, but I’m trying to make it not matter because my Hogwarts was never these 4100 pages

I found my Hogwarts in tumblr posts where Harry goes to therapy and George can’t look at himself in the mirror, and Remus’s scars aren’t just from lycanthropy

I found my Hogwarts in fanart of Sirius Black with top surgery scars that made me yearn for something I didn’t have a name for yet

I found my Hogwarts in the act of creation and Joanne is the boggart in the fucking closet

Is the only witch we need to burn

Joanne has forgotten that magic is the art of possibility

That fantasy is a world of discovery

Is construction

Is deconstruction

Is ripping the world apart and building it anew

Joanne calls women magic, but only the ones who were born with vaginas

Joanne turns magic into a cage and its iron burns my fae fingers

So sit your ass down and shut the fuck up and let me give you a lesson in trans-figuration

In the morning I wake up, breath my gender into my lungs

The dresser, the wardrobe, the vanity, the mirror are all part of this operation of invention

In allowing me to explore a rainbow-coloured spectrum of possibility

The way that I feel when I put my binder on is magic

Every time someone remembers to actually switch up my pronouns is magic

That I have the power to turn my body into the one I want it to be is magic

Icing the genderqueer flag onto the pride cookies we’re making is magic

My friend’s voice cracking for the first time on testosterone is magic

Gender envy sparking through my veins like a drug is magic

The feeling of chipped black nail polish on my fingernails is magic

The way I feel when he says I’ll love you no matter what gender you are is magic

Neopronouns are magic

Having queer friends is magic

And this world that you’ve created isn’t yours anymore it’s mine

My Hogwarts doesn’t have gender divided dorms

My Hogwarts knows where you belong before you do

My Hogwarts is getting magical HRT and learning body glamours to help with dysphoria

My Hogwarts is not witches and wizards but wixen

My Hogwarts is a letter arriving with the name your parents refuse to say

My Hogwarts is choosing who you want to be the way the wand chooses the wizard

My Hogwarts is looking into the mirror of Erised and finally having a name for the thing you feel inside, is whispering to yourself “it isn’t all in my head” as you see the true you reflected back for the first time

When I say trans is beautiful what I mean is have you ever held the grape before tasting the wine?

Have you ever held the baby calf before drinking of her milk?

Have you ever caressed the blank paper before it held a story?

As a child, did you ever sit in front of the oven just to watch the bread rise?

Or taste the sap when it dripped fresh from the tree, sour and tart?

Do you know the beauty in creation?

The magic act of turning a bouquet of flowers into a dove?

I am a writer, not just of stories, but of the truth of my own body

This world already struggles to find room for me in its pages

If I’m going to create a world, I’m going to create one with enough empty spaces for my gender to run free

And Joanne, it wasn’t your one size fits all world that I fell in love with

It was the possibility of what that world could be

My Hogwarts is a community of fanfiction writers and artists who are building a new castle that everyone calls home

Is the knowledge that splinters under my skin means that I’m doing something right

That I’m getting there

That one day I will get there

And it won’t be because of you, it will all be because of me

“Do not pity the dead, Harry. Pity the living, and, above all those who live without love.”

I do pity you Joanne

I pity the feeling of an imagination with limitations

I pity you for all the amazing, wonderful, magical trans people you will never deserve to meet

I pity you for creating something that could have been so beautiful only to make it mean

I’m not going to call you she-who-must-not-be named anymore

Cause the whole world should know who you are Joanne

They should know the person you’ve chosen to become

In my Hogwarts I choose to conjure up possibility until I feel recognition in my bones

I refuse to become the villain your Hogwarts tried to make of me

You’re a worse villain than any one I write could ever be

[mrfutureboy]

May I ask for some Trans Marty headcanons 👉👈🥺 (only if you want to ofc)

hi anon! for sure!

tho honestly im not sure i have many that are my own?? there are so many people in the fandom that spend more time thinking (in general) and that have come up with some amazing headcanons that i subscribe to so admittedly i havent spent as much time thinking up hc’s myself! well, maybe this isnt true in the case of marlene mcfly but this post isnt about her lol. so mostly this’ll probably end up being a list of things other people have said/pointed out. that said, if i mention a hc thats yours just be like “hey thats from my post!” and i’ll link u because i honestly cant remember who said what anymore

edit: added links to op’s of various hcs

so first of all, his layers. layers on layers on layers to hide the shape of his body is so trans masc of him. this is literally canon so it doesnt even count. (x, x)

but i’ll quickly mention some other things people have pointed out that are supported by canon: everyone calling him “mcfly” instead of his first name, twin pines lorraine not liking jennifer for no real reason except maybe thinking marty shouldnt be dating a girl at all (x)

i have NO idea what hrt was like in the 80s, if it were even available at all, but i like the hc that doc brews up some homemade testosterone for his good pal marty (x) man of all sciences, right? honestly doc was probably already making t for himself (trans doc ftw) and then marty came out to him and he was like i have just the thing.

going off that, doc probably helps him with his shots bc i think marty’s a big baby when it comes to needles.

again, resources in the 1980’s are not something i know about but given the climate and technology i doubt there was an extensive handbook on transmasculinity and safely binding. so marty’s methods of binding were probably not very safe, in terms of what he used and how long he wore it. tho @rovermcfly’s recent post about mjf’s harness looking like a binder (x)could support a hc that doc made marty a binder. as his friend and an elder trans guy you know he’s looking out for him. but when marty’s not binding…layers on layers on layers. side note i would hope marty wasnt wearing a binder when he got to 1955 cuz oh GOD he wouldve been wearing that for way too fucking long and with everything that physically happened to him in the first like 12 hrs of him being there he’d surely have some lasting damage

this is mostly a joke hc but marty comes to doc one day and is complaining about his chest while doc’s working on something, and towards the end of marty’s rant doc turns around holding up a knife and martys like whoa uhh im not so sure about that, doc and doc just turns back around. this doesnt ever happen again or get brought up so marty’s not sure if doc was kidding or not. also makes marty wonder if he’d done it before (doc’s got a flat chest after all) and then he starts looking around for stray squirrels with stitches a la frankensteins monster lol

i like @rovermcfly ‘s hc that marty saw “martin seamus” in his family tree and was like yep thats my name (x) which honestly fits really well with canon like how are you going to name ur first son david tiberius, ur daughter linda [no middlename], but then when you get to your third kid suddenly be like “lets do a really traditional family name”. Unlikely.

marty probably came out to doc first. doc quickly made him feel safe and loved and comfortable so yeah i can imagine doc knew before anyone else. and then jennifer and then lastly (maybe accidentally) his parents

Lorraine probably had a fucking conniption when marty first cut all his hair off. also i hate to say it but i feel like she was the least supportive parent (not that george was raving about it) in the twin pines timeline. all im going to say about lone pine lorraine here is that she came around faster (or at least started to) than her counterpart, my justification being the breakfast scene at the end of the movie compared to the dinner scene earlier re: jennifer

personally i dont feel like marty’s been out for longer than a few years but idk thats just a gut feeling i dont have anything else to say abt that

Umm yeah thats all i have to say atm! Thank u anon for the ask :3 and again, if anyone recognizes any posts ive referenced, please @ me so i can link them here!

[briar-rolfes-research-oubliette]

Oh my GOD WE MADE IT TO

PART THREE:

JUST BY BEING MALE

I personally did flip over the initiation paperwork for starting HRT to find this whole book stapled to the back.

Time for a LIST!!

1. MALES ARE REBELLIOUS BY NATURE

“…Author George Gilder in Sexual Suicide reported that men commit more than 90 percent of major crimes of violence, 100 percent of the rapes, and 95 percent of the burglaries. Men comprise 94 percent of our drunken drivers, 70 percent of suicides, 91 percent of offenders against family and children. Most often, the chief perpetrators are single men.

Our maleness brings a natural, uniquely male form of rebelliousness. This natural tendency gives us the arrogance needed to stop short of God’s standards. As men, we’ll often choose sin simply because we like our own way.”

“That is NOT how statistics work!” I yell, rebelliously

2. MALES FIND THE “STRAIGHT” LIFE DULL AND BORING

Wow… yeah… you’re hearing it more and more.

Pardon me, but isn’t this just called fucking capitalism, Dr Dobson?

Anyway men do sexual sin because of not being good at capitalism like God wants. “…our natural dislike of the straight life gives us the desire to stop short and to instead experience the temporary pleasures of sin.”

I’m a red-blooded American man because I, too, have a natural dislike of the straight life.

3. MALES HAVE A STRONG, REGULAR SEX DRIVE

“Many women,” Dr. Dobson notes, “stand in amazement at how regularly their husbands desire sexual intercourse.”

This book does not believe women are EVER horny.

They talk about their favourite subject, sexy billboard:

A foxy babe gets your motor running!

Your body often breaks ranks, engaging in battle against you. This traitorous tendency pushes our sexual drive to ignore God’s standards. When this sexual drive combines with our natural male arrogance and our natural male desire to drift from the straight life, we’re primed and fueled for sexual captivity.

PRIMED AND FUELLED FOR SEXUAL CAPTIVITY! I’m humbled by how well these men keep writing bdsm by accident? Oh, to have even an ounce of their talent!

Now they’re going to tantalise us even more. This comes right before a page turn:

“The means of ignition, meanwhile, comes from the fourth of our natural male tendencies—and the most deadly.”

4. MALES RECEIVE SEXUAL GRATIFICATION THROUGH THE EYES

…huge letdown. I was hoping for “4. THE SCROTUM IS A PORTAL TO HELL”.

“Our eyes give men the means to sin broadly and at will. We don’t need a date or a mistress. We don’t ever need to wait. We have our eyes and can draw sexual gratification through them at any time. We’re turned on by female nudity in any way, shape, or form.”

IN ANY WAY, SHAPE, OR FORM. Whoa,, is this where the conservative reaction to nudity in art comes from?

“We aren’t picky. It can come in a photograph of a nude stranger just as easily as in a romantic interlude with a wife. We have a visual ignition switch when it comes to viewing the female anatomy.”

If this is true I can’t believe we haven’t yet invented the Weaponised Nude. Instantly render an opposing force too horny to invade,

“Women seldom understand this because they aren’t sexually stimulated in the same way. Their ignitions are tied to touch and relationship.”

I’m trying not to have the overwhelming reaction of Git Gud to this book but… come on, Fred and Steve, women do not need to be in a relationship to have a libido.

“Let’s restate this fourth natural tendency in different words so you don’t miss the point: For males, impurity of the eyes is sexual foreplay.”

“That’s right. Just like stroking an inner thigh or rubbing a breast.”

“God views foreplay outside marriage as wrong. … From God’s viewpoint, sex is more than being inside a woman.”

I’m being so normal about this. I’m actually being really brave.

I cannot process everything happening here on a metaphorical level.

Okay this is again just like… we’re getting porn writer again.

I’m sorry but um… this is hot? Fred and Steve are just getting hot now, except for their use of the words “I began to stare and really lust,” which I would challenge in a crit group.

The next section is called…

MALENESS VS. MANHOOD

Seeing these words in all caps was so exciting that I began to stare. It gave me sexual gratification and chemical highs through my eyes

Before I get stuck into the spin-off books, I feel I need to do due diligence and finish reading Every Man’s Battle, which for those just joining me, is the how-to guide to being a totally normal and sexually pure Christian man of the early 2000s.

Prologue

Part 1: Where Are We?

Part 2: How We Got Here

Previously, in my battle against the battle for sexual purity, I only made it through the first chapter of part two before I got so mad that I had to stop. But now I’ve downloaded an illegal ebook copy so I can skim read way easier. (Even better… the screenshots will be more legible.)

Time for… Every Man’s Battle, part two, the chapter called

Obedience or mere excellence?

To introduce the weird theme of this chapter, they start off with:

“... American businesses are in search of excellence. They could be in search of perfection, of course—perfect products, perfect service—but perfection is too costly and eats into profits…”

It doesn’t get any better for many pages. I remember why I got bored out of my gourd now.

Fred drops a totally not made up anecdote from his church:

We MUST keep this hermetically sealed from the sex scene discourse on Tumblr.

To recap, Mary got a tear in her eye because of popular movies with racy sexual situations,

This book is good. I just forgot it was fun because it kept trying to tell me about American business practices! …and then Fred started talking about his church for another section. It’s boring. Don’t worry, you’re missing nothing here.

OKAY FINALLY, SOME GOOD STUFF! Fred wants to talk about the teens.

Our adolescent Christians are often indistinguishable from their non-Christian peers, sharing the same activities, music, jokes, and attitudes about premarital sex. Kristin, a teenager, told us, “Our youth group is filled with kids faking their Christian walk. They are actually taking drugs, drinking, partying, and having sex. If you want to walk purely, it’s easier to hang around with the non-Christians at school than to hang around with the Christians at church. I say that because school friends know where I stand and they say, ‘That’s cool—I can accept that.’ The Christian kids mock me, laughing and asking, ‘Why be so straight? Get a life!’ They pressure my values at every turn.”

Kristin, with all the love in my heart: you are such a dobber. Why be so straight? Get a life!

She told us about Brad, a lay leader’s son, who told her, “I know intercourse is wrong before marriage, but anything short of that is fine. I love to get up under a bra.”

Brad, you can’t tell these things to Kristin. She is a cop!!!

Fred goes on to account some more things he’s been told by totally real people he totally knows:

Sadly, the adults are no different from the Christian teens. Linda, a single career woman, says her adult singles group at church has “players”—men and women who stalk their prey to satisfy their own needs.

Linda, you too are totally not made up, I’m sure.

Oh we have a call to action now! Let’s all check our uh… standards for mixture.

The last one is a bit of an exaggeration. You can’t actually control your kids’ thoughts until you master the techniques in Every Man’s Psychic Battle,

I’m detecting some of Steve’s touch on the adjectives here. Full-busted sweaters.,. slick spandex…

We have countless churches filled with countless men encumbered by sexual sin, weakened by low-grade sexual fevers.

I’m losing it… this kid had the opportunity to do the funniest possible thing and absolutely took it. I hope you’re doing great out there, James. Never let the Kristins of this world win!!