#HOWEVER the lecturer was so bad at her job that the two (2) methods she provided detail on are jumbled up in my head

[problemeule]

once again academically challenged by my academically challenging degree

[wedreamedlove]

[Confessing Voice]

"Under the glimmering lights I was only watching your radiance. I'll place everything I wish to tell you in this song."

This is doing a rerun on the ENG server so what better time to post a translation on it than now? Maybe it'll encourage people to get the card. But I'm also curious about what people feel regarding the differences between the versions.

Does the Asian version seem more quiet with charged undertones while the English version is more physical? It reminds me of reviews I've read about different actors' takes on the Phantom of the Opera lol.

NOTE: This is the JP version with CN subbed lines because I needed to keep the literary reference with the song he sings.

[True Love Date]

I was meticulously checking the first broadcast of Miracle Finder for the New Year in the editing room.

It was an important broadcast related to our sponsors and our ratings this year. I looked over the show's contents with especially strict eyes.

Editing Staff: We've edited this 12 times already...

Everyone's line of sight gathered on me. They were waiting for me to give the OK.

MC: I think it's good this time. We're done with this!

Cheers rose. Looking at everyone who worked hard through consecutive all-nighters I felt bad.

MC: Good job everyone. I'll be generous with the project rewards so look forward to that!

Editing Staff: President, the person we need to thank the most is Professor Xu Mo.

I showed a confused expression.

Editing Staff: I secretly contacted Professor Xu Mo when we kept on redoing this. He gave me a lot of advice even though he was busy...

I looked at my phone screen in surprise. Two weeks earlier---

~~~

His face crossed my mind when I was troubled over this current project.

My hand moved on its own to call Xu Mo. It started to become a habit to contact him whenever I had problems.

Xu Mo picked up after several rings.

MC: Xu Mo? Are you busy right now? There's something I'd like to ask you...

Static crackled from the other side of the call. After a while, I heard Xu Mo's voice.

Xu Mo: I'm sorry but lately... I've been busy.

His tone was calm but also distant. It wasn't from exhaustion. I felt a coldness from somewhere.

MC: Don't worry. It wasn't anything serious, so...

Xu Mo: Mm. If it's nothing then I'm going to end the call.

MC: Okay...

Xu Mo didn't say anything further. That was more than enough to make me feel the distance between us.

MC: Wait!

MC: Um... you might be busy, but take care of yourself. Bye bye.

Just when I thought there was rough breathing it suddenly fell quiet. Hearing a monotone beeping, I came back to myself. Xu Mo had already ended the call.

MC: Did he hear my last words...?

Looking at the ended call I was struck by a strange feeling.

Maybe I was thinking too much? His words and speech was cold like never before.

MC: What am I thinking? Xu Mo is just busy...

Although I tried telling myself that I couldn't help but feel uneasy somewhere.

I shook my head and drove away my negative emotions. I relied too much on him. This time I needed to solve things by myself.

Editing Staff: ---President, President? Are the credits good like this?

I returned to the present after being lost in my thoughts. The words "Program Supervisor: Xu Mo" on the credits roll jumped into my eyes.

MC: W-what sort of advice did Professor Xu Mo give? Um... how did you get him to help? When was that?

Editing Staff: It was about 2 days ago. We were editing until 4AM but still had to redo everything... It was when you fell asleep on the sofa.

Editing Staff: After I called Professor Xu Mo, he asked me what happened to you, and I replied you were sleeping on the sofa.

Editing Staff: Then he ended the call saying he was busy. But the next morning an email arrived with detailed advice...

Editing Staff: The strange thing is that he wrote for me not to let you know. But you've found out already, so it's fine, right?

I wondered why Xu Mo helped when he had refused once.

(Why did he say not to let me know? Is there a problem if I know about it...?)

I also didn't understand the reason for Xu Mo's sudden coldness.

For a while there were no replies to my texts and his lectures were on break too. It was like he was distancing himself from me on purpose.

My heart clenched when I thought this.

Editing Staff: President, why don't we invite Professor Xu Mo to our New Year's party this time? He looked like he enjoyed our year-end party a few days ago and he helped us out this time too...

I said this while looking at the New Year's party notice I sent to everyone.

MC: He... seems to be busy, so he might not come.

Editing Staff: But he came to the year-end party even though he was busy, right...?

I hurried out of the editing room as if ending the topic.

On the day of the New Year's party, I came with everyone in the company to a newly opened high-class karaoke box in Lianyu City.

It was an elegant, modern, and spacious reserved room. A white grand piano and guitar were placed in front of the karaoke machine, and beside that was a small stage.

I checked my phone's text messages over and over again. A message from 3 days ago remained there.

Text: Xu Mo, my company's going to have a New Year's party at Petrichor 3 days later. If you'd like, why don't you come?

Text: You looked like you enjoyed singing at the year-end party a while ago, so I thought I'd invite you this time too. But if you're busy then please don't hesitate to refuse.

Even though the message was definitely sent there was no response. I sighed with worry and disappointment.

Yue Yue: President, why have you been staring constantly at your phone? Work is done for today!

Yue Yue quickly stole my phone, randomly touching the screen, and then placed it in front of herself.

MC: Hey, my phone...

I stretched out my hand but Yue Yue pushed a set of cards to me.

Yue Yue: You don't sing, right? Then let's play cards!

The company members around us gathered in interest. I had no choice but to pass the time playing cards with everyone.

Xu Mo's house---

The phone rang and a message arrived. It was from [NAME].

Xu Mo hesitated slightly and then picked up the phone. However, the message was just numbers and letters and he didn't understand what she wrote.

What was this? Xu Mo's expression became severe.

He searched on the internet and tried various methods but he couldn't decipher it. He felt a sense of frustration.

He wondered why she had sent this message.

Was she angry at being treated coldly? Or was it a demand for a reply to her New Year's party invitation...?

Xu Mo dialed her phone from his landline. However, only an automated voice saying "This phone has been turned off" came.

Xu Mo: What is wrong with me?

Xu Mo: When did I start caring about these conventions?

For a while, Xu Mo stared at the message which came from the girl 3 days ago. It was written with her usual detailed and kind words.

At the beginning, his objective was just to get close to her. But the closer he got the more he was drawn to her for some reason.

Xu Mo: Didn't I already decide to leave her life?

Why did he help her again even though he refused her once? Why was his heart unsettled from this incomprehensible message?

The intense pain in Xu Mo's heart insistently told him the reason. That over there was an answer he couldn't escape even if he desperately averted his eyes.

The moment the door to the karaoke room opened Xu Mo faintly understood the answer.

That he couldn't leave her.

~~~

MC: Xu Mo! You came?

Her clear eyes widened roundly and she looked at him. The person reflected in those eyes was him alone.

Xu Mo suddenly placed a hand on his chest. A thin thread was tightly squeezing his heart.

He sighed.

Forget it, he would be foolish once more with this foolish girl.

Xu Mo entered the room and sat beside her naturally.

MC: Weren't you busy?

MC: Erm, nevermind. You didn't reply so I didn't think you'd come.

Even under the dim lights he could clearly see her emotions.

There was joy and doubt.

He swallowed back the words he was about to say and softly stroked her hair.

Xu Mo: Sorry. I couldn't get through to your phone so I came here.

MC: You couldn't get through?

She looked down and searched the top of the sofa before showing him the phone, biting her lip awkwardly.

MC: I accidentally turned it off...

Xu Mo smiled lightly with some exasperation. Light and shadow were jumbled together in his eyes.

Xu Mo: Silly.

She gave a pure laugh and then, covering her face, her eyes darted around.

MC: Were you worried about me?

Xu Mo: Yes.

Xu Mo approached her and nodded without hesitation.

Yue Yue: Huh? It's Professor Xu Mo? President, you should have told us if the professor was coming.

MC: Uh... that's because...

Xu Mo: I heard everyone was having a New Year's party so I came without an invitation. I'm not interrupting, am I?

Yue Yue: No way. I was moved when I heard you singing at the year-end party. Everyone wants to hear it again!

Yue Yue said this and then ran back to the stage again to sing enthusiastically with Anna.

Xu Mo: Why aren't you singing together with them?

MC: Huh? I... don't sing much.

Xu Mo: I know. But I'd like to hear it.

My face turned red at Xu Mo's unexpected words.

MC: You're planning on teasing me again, aren't you...

The corners of Xu Mo's lips rose and then he sighed.

Xu Mo: It's true I was worried about you. It's also true that I want to hear you sing.

Xu Mo: Everything is true.

His casual words resounded in my heart more than any other noise in the room.

Yue Yue started singing a sad love song with Anna who was still on the stage.

Anna: Did you really throw away those glittering days...

Yue Yue: I had many dreams in those long nights. Don't remember me. One day you will also know pain...

Xu Mo looked at the words showing on the screen. The flickering light was reflected in his eyes.

The lively karaoke party on top of the stage repeated and, below the stage, everyone else amused themselves with games.

Seeing that Xu Mo had come everyone persistently invited him to join their game.

Gu Meng: Next is the improved version of Spin the Bottle! Whoever this beer bottle points to has to answer everyone's question. If they can't answer with the truth then as penalty they need to drink all this alcohol!

When Gu Meng clapped her hands the editing staff carried over a tray with five cups of whiskey.

Colleagues: This is overdoing it!

Looking at the lined up drinks, I became worried. I would get drunk from just one cup, so if I drank them all I might collapse.

That reminded me, I hadn't seen Xu Mo drink before. I looked at him inquisitively.

Xu Mo nodded and patted the back of my hand.

The beer bottle began to spin and then pointed at Gu Meng.

Yue Yue: Do you have someone you like?

Yue Yue, who had joined the circle at one point, began the questions. At that first question... everyone's eyes gathered on Gu Meng.

Gu Meng glared lightly at Yue Yue and then reluctantly nodded.

Cheers rose. Gu Meng spun the bottle as if trying to avenge herself. This time the bottle pointed at Xu Mo and stopped.

Yue Yue: Professor Xu Mo, is there someone you like in this room?

Gu Meng: How about trying another question?

Yue Yue: That's why I said "in this room"!

Xu Mo smiled and nodded decisively.

Xu Mo: There is.

That answer was so surprisingly clear that the area became quiet. After that cheers exploded and Gu Meng whistled.

My heart was already racing the second Yue Yue asked that question.

The person Xu Mo liked was in this room... My ears turned red and my mind went blank.

I unconsciously brought my hand back but Xu Mo grabbed it firmly.

Xu Mo: Why is your face red?

MC: Erm, uh... it's because of the drinks!

Xu Mo: But... it doesn't seem like you've drank anything yet.

MC: Umm, it's because it's hot then?

Looking at me as my voice gradually became smaller, Xu Mo chuckled beside my ear.

Yue Yue: Okay, next is Professor Xu Mo again!

The beer bottle pointed at Xu Mo again and stopped. This time Gu Meng restrained Yue Yue and asked a question.

Gu Meng: Who is the person you said you liked?

Everyone held their breath and stared at Xu Mo.

My heart wouldn't stop pounding. I looked down and reflexively pulled back the hand that was held by Xu Mo.

Xu Mo smiled, as if he understood something, and drained the drinks one after another.

Everyone was a bit disappointed and began to spin the bottle again.

I secretly glanced at him out of the corner of my eye. He looked drunk and even his ears were red.

MC: Xu Mo, are you okay?

He nodded his head and brought his lips to my ear. His hot breath and the smell of alcohol drifted around me and it felt ticklish.

Xu Mo: I'm fine, although... you still owe me an answer.

MC: I...

I was at a loss for an answer and, at last after panicking, I fell silent. I just concentrated on touching my hair and hiding my discomposure.

Maybe it was because of the drinks or maybe the atmosphere of the place, but Xu Mo became talkative and his eyes were hazy.

Yue Yue: It's finally the president's turn!

Yue Yue and Gu Meng exchanged looks and then came up to me together.

Gu Meng: Who's the person important to you? Please be specific.

MC: How come I'm the only one who has to be "specific"?

Yue Yue: You have to keep to the rules. It's useless to try and run!

The person most important to me--- I looked at Xu Mo shyly and then breathed in deeply.

MC: That person showed me a world I didn't know about until now.

MC: He's warm but not oppressive. He's calm but not melancholic. He's a person that's like a clear sky and a deep fog.

MC: He also notices the slightest change in my feelings and taught me the laws of this world.

MC: Whenever I'm lost he leads me forward with a gentleness that surrounds me.

I sunk into my memories and continued to talk by myself, not noticing how beside me Xu Mo placed his glass down, furrowed his brows, and bit his lip...

MC: He is... a very, very important person to me.

Finished talking about my heart, I gave a deep sigh.

Colleague A: For the president to talk so passionately means that "man" isn't here, right? If he was here, then you wouldn't say this, huh~.

Yue Yue: I wanna know who it is!

MC: Hey now! Enough with the chatter, let's move on...

Everyone unanimously guessed at the "man" I talked about. Xu Mo remained silent and raised his glass, taking a mouthful of his drink.

Despite the game resuming Xu Mo seemed strange somewhere. It was like his cheer up to now had disappeared.

MC: Maybe he's drunk? He drank a lot earlier...

MC: I've never seen him drunk. I'm sure it'd be cute.

I stood in front of the sink, thinking about how he'd look drunk, and giggled.

~~~

The moment I stepped out into the hall to return to the room my arm was suddenly grabbed by someone. I was held against a sturdy chest with a force I couldn't fight against.

I was dumbfounded. The scent of summer grass and the smell of faint alcohol surrounded me.

When I came back to myself I was held tightly to Xu Mo. My back was against the wall and one of my arms was caught by him.

MC: Xu Mo...

My heart raced and I didn't know what to do.

Xu Mo looked at me with empty eyes.

Xu Mo: Is that person so important to you?

MC: Huh?

Xu Mo: Tell me. Who is that person?

Xu Mo suddenly came close, speaking in a censuring tone.

(Hold on. Didn't he hear me talk? Or... did he misunderstand?)

I looked up at Xu Mo. Complicated emotions that seemed about to overflow even now were being restrained desperately in his eyes.

MC: You've got it wrong...

Xu Mo: Tell me...

Xu Mo came even closer. The scorching heat of his presence enveloped my surroundings.

It was the first time I saw him with such a scary look. It was so surprising I had no idea what to do. I stared into his eyes and said this.

MC: It's you.

MC: ... The "man" I was talking about is you, Xu Mo. You're my important person.

Xu Mo's eyes became dazed for a second. The smell of alcohol disappeared.

MC: I was talking about you. But... it looks like I caused a misunderstanding...

Xu Mo regained his calm and quietly released my arm.

Xu Mo: I'm sorry. Did I hurt you?

MC: A little...

Xu Mo looked down and rubbed gently at my arm. I couldn't see his expression but his warmth reached up to my ears.

When we returned to the room everyone was still excited. My heart raced just from remembering what happened earlier.

Pressing on my chest, I told myself to "calm down". Then, so that he wouldn't drink any more alcohol, I secretly pulled his glass in front of me.

Yue Yue: President, you never sing, right? How about singing 1 song today at least?

Yue Yue held out the mic to me.

MC: Erm! I'll pass...

I looked at Xu Mo and nervously declined.

It wasn't that I was bad at singing. It was just that I wasn't prepared to sing in front of Xu Mo.

Yue Yue: If the president won't sing then I'll have Professor Xu Mo sing!

Hearing that, everyone became even more enthusiastic.

Xu Mo, who was looking at me, nodded. I also wanted to hear him sing.

He gave a soft smile and, holding a glass, went to the stage.

It was at that time that I finally noticed him wearing a black turtleneck and dark purple scarf.

The speckled lights shone on him and how he had a hand casually placed in his pocket. A languid and alluring atmosphere was brought out.

Xu Mo set his glass down. Then, after thinking a little, he came to me and nonchalantly took my hand and returned directly to the stage again.

He wasn't using a strong force, but there was a sense of pressure that brooked no refusal.

Before I knew it, he slotted his body against mine and placed his chin on my shoulder. The aroma of the alcohol mixed with a refreshing fragrance which was like grasslands after the rains stopped.

Xu Mo: What would you like to sing?

MC: ... Do I have to sing?

Xu Mo: I want to hear you sing.

MC: You won't be shocked after hearing my singing, right?

I raised my head and said this, pursing my lips.

Xu Mo: Then... why don't we try it?

His mouth came close to my ear and he said this in a low voice. I nodded in a dazed manner with a mind gone hazy from the alcohol.

Xu Mo operated the karaoke machine and a mellow melody rang out.

His palm covered my hand. It was a large hand which seemed to cover my hand and the mic together.

Something like a weak current seemed to run through my entire body from his dry palm...

His eyes stared straight at me... straight into the depths of my heart.

Something like a decision was reflected in those eyes.

Xu Mo: When I fall in love, it will be forever.

It was a low enrapturing voice, like a late autumn wind or the swelling night ocean. He sang with his heart in it.

That voice knocked on the door to my heart.

Memories came into my mind one after another.

The first time we met and his beautiful face under a dazzling light. The time we met in a movie theatre at midnight. That golden-colored picnic. That rainbow after the rain lifted...

All those memories rode on that singing voice and slowly flowed throughout the sparkling room.

MC: And the moment---

MC: I can feel that you feel that way too---

As we sang we came even closer together and our hands continued to remain touching.

From the beginning until the end, Xu Mo looked at me with a constant smile and eyes that held expectation.

Xu Mo: It turns out a song can be this short.

The song ended and we got off the stage.

MC: Xu Mo, you really do sing well!

Xu Mo's lips curved and he said this with mischievous eyes.

Xu Mo: Oh? Can I believe... the words of a little liar?

MC: Huh, what do you mean?

Xu Mo: I was actually looking forward to your shocking singing.

I remembered how I said earlier "You won't be shocked after hearing my singing, right?" and my face turned red.

MC: Who asked you to believe in that...

Xu Mo: Then what else have you tricked me on?

Xu Mo flicked my forehead with a finger.

MC: Um... before I said you didn't have to come if you were busy, but to be honest I really wanted you to come.

I looked at Xu Mo and, while thinking this and that, spoke awkwardly.

Xu Mo was surprised. Flickering light surged up violently in his eyes and I saw him swallow, Adam's apple bobbing.

MC: What's wrong?

He gave a long sigh and then spoke in a voice even lower than earlier.

Xu Mo: I won't do that anymore.

He looked apologetically at me.

Xu Mo: Why won't you ask if I've ever tricked you?

I blinked.

MC: Um... of course I know that you've tricked me.

Xu Mo: For example?

MC: You were clearly drunk earlier even though you said you weren't drunk. Even more, you misunderstood me...

Looking at her grumble, Xu Mo was a bit surprised and he laughed quietly. Then he drew in the glass beside his hand and drank a mouthful.

His mind was hazy. Her smile and the spotted lights swayed in front of his eyes.

He thought about how he was surely drunk. But that was fine. Being drunk was better.

The music could continue, the drinks could continue.

That way he could tell himself this. That he was taken in by this atmosphere and the alcohol. And that's what these gentle feelings and hesitation resulted from.

Xu Mo raised his glass and drained it all at once.

~~~

DATE DIARY

Everyone worked really hard for the first show of the new year. Finally, after it took shape, I learned that Xu Mo helped. I thought he had refused to though... Why?

On that day, if I remember correctly, I asked for Xu Mo's help but he refused me coldly. Why did he help me again at the critical moment? I don't really understand Xu Mo.

I thought Xu Mo wouldn't come to the New Year's party but he came on the day of. He said he became worried because I didn't answer my phone. During a game of Spin the Bottle, Xu Mo confessed for the first time that he had a person he liked.

I also talked about the person most important to me. But, because Xu Mo was drunk, he seemed to misunderstand that. I'm someone who rarely sings in front of others but for some reason I ended up in a duet with Xu Mo. There was joy in his eyes.

[capricornus-rex]

Playing Pretend (4)

Requested by: @calkesttiss​ | Prompt:

Hi! I just watched isi & ossi (rich girl and poor boxer boy AH) on netflix and now i cant stop thinking about cal and fake dating. Do with that what you will 😂

Cal Kestis x Reader

1 | 2 | 3 | Next: Part 5 | Masterlist

4 of ?

Cal found a way down the building and walked his way back to the Mobara Palace, one of the few cantinas in the Capital that have docking bays. The Mobara Palace was one of the biggest in the city too; occupying a whole block to cover the bar itself as well as the elaborate network of paths that connect the bays to one another, with the cantina at the starting point of it all.

The Mantis’s entrance ramp hissed and lowered, opening the door before him. An aromatic waft was the first to welcome him upon his entry.

“Looks like Greez is cooking something good,” he comments to BD-1.

As he entered the ship, Greez’s dual pairs of arms were all over the pantry and yet each arm was carefully distributed to a certain task in cooking.

“Smells good, Greez!” Cal beamed.

“Oh good, you’re just in time for dinner—with all that wandering around you’re doing, you’re probably hungry,”

He joined the others at the table as soon as Greez lifted the pot from the stove and served everyone their own plates. The meal was solemn and yet there was a warm aura emanating around them. Cal decided to up the mood by striking a conversation.

“How long do you guys still think we’re gonna stay here until this blows over?”

A silence at the dinner table. Cere’s eyes shifted, she searched Greez’s face and studied his reaction toward Cal’s question. There was only one possible and realistic answer, but the boy doesn’t seem to concur with it.

“Cal,” she clears her throat. “You do understand why…”

Before she could even reiterate her question, Cal already knew this mere dinner table conversation was going to be another lecture.

“I know. We’re hiding from the loan shark that Greez borrowed the money from to get this ship,”

It was an embarrassing truth, but a truth nonetheless. Greez felt like the situation required him to say a piece.

“Look, kid, we can scrape by with what we have. I mean, I still got coin on me—but not that enough to cover the loan plus with its interest!”

“Odd jobs, honest jobs, aren’t gonna cut it in a short time, Greez. At least you would know that, of all people,” Cal argued.

Cal had been wandering around the city looking for a quick way to earn some coin in the quickest way possible. The downtown and underground areas of the planet had some questionable methods of earning money—but they were easy money. Although Cal had grown up with street smarts, part of that knowledge is when and where a solution is either a real solution or another problem later on.

“You know the Sabacc, don’t ya?” Greez whispered with the left corner of his mouth directed to Cal.

“Greez, we are not going with gambling!” Cere sternly exclaimed. The impact of her fork dropping against the plate was just as scary as a fist landing on the table like a gavel.

There was another silence amongst them again. Cere continued on with her own piece.

“We cannot endanger anyone in our crew with something that won’t be worth our while. I don’t mind pretending to be some stranger in a different name just so we can have someplace to stay safe together. But I will not allow anybody in this ship to get into something that would jeopardize themselves or the crew altogether, understand?”

Cere’s outburst hardened the silence. Everybody understands that she hasn’t outgrown her military discipline from her days of participating in the Clone Wars—and she’s utilizing them in predicaments such as these amongst the Mantis crew members.

These episodes of hers were occasional, therefore it made her unpredictable, intimidating, but somehow her aggressive delivery doesn’t outweigh her rationale or true motive. Everybody—Cal, Greez, Merrin, and ultimately BD-1—knew that she means well and that she always will.

Cere processed what just had happened with her. She attempted to recompose herself in the midst of the awkwardness. She cleared her throat.

“I’m sorry… I didn’t mean to yell.”

“It’s fine, Cere,” Greez consoles.

The dinner proceeds. Cal wondered if the girl he met yesterday and bumped into just now would be a better subject to talk about.

“I met someone last night. Bumped into her again,”

All heads turn to Cal.

“She frequents a pub not too far from here. I always see her near or inside that place. Maybe if I bump into her again, I’ll ask her where I can find a place to get some cash—and a clean one at that,”

“Are you sure she is to be trusted?” Cere maintained her stern tone even after recomposing herself.

Cal was so sure of his judgment about you. He recalled the moments where you two were together. He felt your kindness and compassion—he knew of your good intentions, you meant no harm—but he also sensed some sort of sadness in you.

“You probably have heard of Senator Bail Organa?” Cere takes the conversation reins.

Cal shrugs, “Yeah sure, I know him. I saw him sometimes in the Senate Building in Coruscant.”

“Well, he knows of our presence here—don’t worry, he doesn’t know about the loan shark at our tail—and he’s invited us to a social function,”

“Social function?” Cal raised his eyebrow at Cere’s unusual choice of word.

“Apparently, this party was being held by a colleague of his. Perhaps they needed to fill the guestlist,”

“Proxies,”

“Exactly.”

“How bad can a few no-show guests be? It’s not like it’s gonna dent their bank account when the catering bill comes!” Greez dryly joked and it was the received likewise.

In light of this new announcement, Cal began to wonder how long does he have to stay in the party before he could sneak back out in the streets and find the unusual girl who had to drag him up a rooftop from the Tipsy Taun-Taun just to ask for some self-defense moves.

The following days passed until the day of the banquet has come. That morning, your mother personally made sure that you don’t sleep in and get yourself ready as quickly as possible. She also announced that the stylists are coming in half an hour.

“Mom, I’m perfectly capable of doing my own makeup!” You detest despite still being groggy from being woken up without your consent.

You force yourself out of bed so that you could take a shower. Unfortunately, you didn’t have the luxury of staying too long in the bath—however, you sorely wished you did. You slid deeper into the cold, ivory and gold-trimmed bathtub until only your eyes are on the surface.

A pounding on the door disturbed your watery peace.

“[y/n], hurry up!” your mother growled from the other side.

“Almost done!” you cried back.

You were actually done minutes ago, you only chose to soak yourself for a bit longer with the wishful thinking that they’ll never realize that you’ve locked yourself in your own bathroom. You’d love that though.

“No one could ever go wrong with black,” you muttered as you pulled out an off-shouldered black cocktail dress with stars and planets embroidered with golden thread.

You made quick work of yourself. You did your hair and makeup: applying minimal makeup as possible, you wore your hair down and clipped a silver headband on both ends with four tiers of golden cords hanging over on top of the other. Staring back at yourself in the mirror, a brush in your hand slides down to the length of your hair; with every stroke, you ponder if all this your parents are doing is ever worth it either for themselves or for the family.

You sigh for an answer, or lack thereof. Afterwards, you donned the dress and the shoes—both pieces were in black. The finishing touch—a personal one at that—was a pair of leather fingerless gloves.

“Here goes nothing,” a mantra you tell yourself before exiting your room in attendance to any social gathering you were obliged to attend.

The party started without you. No surprise in that, you thought. Nevertheless, you made your way to ballroom where the chatter of the guests became more and more audible yet incoherent as their voices meddled.

Immediately, you searched for Tazha in the room. She wasn’t easy to miss. Her glittering dress outshines everyone else’s, literally making her a beacon for you to easily see her. You walk up to her.

“Oh you look great!” she compliments.

“Thanks, you too,”

Suddenly, one of the Ithrel sons, Logan who was the third son and was the same age as you, appears ot be walking toward you with what you thought is the stupidest grin you’ve ever seen on a face. He comes in strong by grabbing you by the waist, reel you in for a kiss except you successfully dodged it with your gloved hand.

“Logan? What the hell are you doing?!”

“Well, your mom paid me to flirt with you until you end up falling in love with me, I’ll have a chance in the Junior Legislator’s Program! Plus, we get to support your family until your dad becomes Senator or whatever, I mean, we don’t have a choice on that, we just gotta roll with it,” he beamed with an imbecile’s optimism. “Big bonus if we ever get married though. I mean, she wanted that to happen. So, marry me?”

“Hold up. She did what now?”

Logan repeated your own mother’s plan, he reiterated that this part wasn’t even in the original agreement. Your mother had to negotiate her way through the Ithrels in promising a much stronger bond of support to your family—therefore, you became a sacrificial lamb.

You and Tazha exchanged glances. Both of you communicated clearly through the furrows of your brows and the hard rolling of your eyes. A gradual burst of rage was flowing in your bloodstreams.

“Oh my God, this is just sad and pathetic of you, Logan,” Tazha condescendingly comments.

“I’m gonna give her a piece of my mind tonight,” you growled, your knuckles were white from gripping the bannister too hard.

You searched for your mother in the ballroom. When you spotted her and your father speaking with some guests, you marched through the sea of people until you reached her.

“Mother, may I speak with you?”

Yasina excused herself from her guest and she was in for a surprise with what is about to go down.

“You paid one of the Ithrel sons to date me?! Because you thought that would strengthen your connection with them just so Dad can secure his win in the election? You did this without me knowing? Whatever the hell happened to consent, Mom!?”

“[y/n] Elvas Torvel, I do not allow you to speak to me with a tone like that in an important event like this!” Yasina hissed, struggling to maintain her composure—both mentally and physically—after just being bombarded with questions by her daughter.

“Did you even ever stop to think how I’d feel if you paired me with a complete imbecile?!”

“[y/n], honey, please listen,” your father intervenes but the argument was heating up between you and your mother.

“The Ithrels are a good family. They uphold a clear reputation. We Torvels and Ithrels would be a great collaborative enterprise,”

“You don’t see the problem here, Mom? I don’t want to get married!”

Yasina was silent. Her face was completely aghast: her eyes wide open, her lip was trembling as if wanting to say something but couldn’t because of so much nerves thrashing underneath her skin.

“You will not ruin this event for your own selfish, adolescent needs, young lady. We are not finished with this discussion.”

“Don’t worry, I don’t plan on ending it soon.”

You walked out from your parents. Turning your back on them to wipe away the tears that was welling up in your eyes.

[autoirishlitdiscourses]

Discourse of Saturday, 17 October 2020

Would you? At the same time, and the way: What do you want to recite: 5 pm section on 27 November and 4 of Ulysses that we did not, let me know! Failure to turn your final paper in a way that is necessary, but it's often confused with one. So, here. Which texts I have you down to it. If all else fails, you need to represent them even further is a missed opportunity in multiple absences and is as follows: Up to/one percent/for/scrupulous accuracy/in vocally reproducing the/exact text that they didn't cover but that you give, and you met them at you unless your medical status that I built in the manner of an A-would be unwise simply to wait until I'd spent the day before Thanksgiving. Again, well, but forget which one. Which made me realize that I can link to the research resources on the midterm; is the case that 16 June 1904: The Dubliners perform The Patriot Game, mentioned in/Ulysses/alas, recording is of course that it would have helped to get an incomplete grade for the group as a first response would help for you, plus a few things very well. But the Purdue OWL is a very thoughtful job of drawing fair implications out of ink, network connections go down this road, a high B. I think that your own presuppositions in more detail. Either 1:00, in your mind to some extent in their papers, so if you've already lost on the eleventh line; and so your paper depends on a larger purpose while also leaving options for getting me a photocopy of that motivation should be read as having the courage to pause and build dramatic tension rather than the rules. Reminder: tonight at 7 p. It's true that you don't have a recording of your questions might have been of concern in the specificity of your performance and discussion to end up.

If you can deal with this by dropping into lecture mode if people aren't talking because they haven't started the old Tiddly Show; and that you're discussing. Check to make any changes made I will still expect you to help you to push your paper—as it is constructed in the text of Pearse's speech without too much about midterm grades. However, you did get the group to read and interpret as a whole clearly enjoyed your presentation notes would be central to our understanding of the nine options; he is, you may wish to dispute a grade by Friday evening if you keep an eye on the final, too, or utilitarianism, or Aristotelian virtue, or after you reschedule it: you had a lot of ways in which you dealt.

All of which is fantastic and well thought-experiment, even if you do suboptimally on the grading email that says that you took on a topic you're absolutely welcome to speak, and I'm sure you'll do well on the web I'm pretty sure that you should be proud of. Remember that you're making. Plagiarism and Cheating:/I try to force a discussion leader for your paper must be killed by the end of the quarter, I nominate her: she worked incredibly hard, made great strides, is 50 9 for 5 in the first line of the play, that's incredibly comprehensive. Thanks for your ideas are developing nicely. I have a bunch of academic opinion, etc.

Are Old discussion of An Irish Airman Foresees His Death 5 p. You've not only keeps us on task. Discussion notes for section attendance and participation is 55 5 _9 points. Both of these policies in the context of your performance and discussion: performed: Oh I Do Like a S'Nice S'Mince S'Pie sung by Corp. You may have required a bit so that you took.

I can see it promptly and therefore limit your late penalty, you can respond productively if they haven't done an acceptable job of thinking about identity formation, I think that your paper's overall point or points to which you can find applications in the morning shift if that works better for you in section that you might, of course I know that I wasn't engaged in memorization and recitation of a terrible thing: your writing is very unlikely even a perfect score on the you two both gave strong recitations and did a good number of sections attended, in juxtaposition with your paper would most need in order to do is meaningfully contribute to reproductive success by selection pressure, in your discussion notes, but really, really nice work. Part of the obscenity trial surrounding it.

It was a make-up final on Wednesday evenings and bring them to connect them to go into in order to achieve this—I'm not as bad as it could be. I'm behind where I wanted to write questions on the exam, send me the page numbers for the specific language of your introduction and conclusion do some of the text. She had that cream gown on with the play, but it's not necessary and that you picked a good question, people are reacting to look for cues that tell us? One example of a country Begins as attachment to our own field of action And comes to find love so hurtful so often to be taken by the group as a response to such a good way, the sex-food combination pops up! You've got a potentially very productive, though again, a fair amount of points in this arena is a specific analysis and what question you're answering. James Joyce's Ulysses/is available. Please let me do so. Here is what I initially thought I was now a month and a good one a lot of ways: 1 avoid the specificity that you want it to me, and is mentioned in lecture or section, and getting a why you picked to the right page on your midterm and the phrasing of your material effectively and provided a good thumbnail background to the group.

Still, she's a dear girl. This being a good quarter. You have some very good textual choices and analytical methods just depends on where you land overall in this direction would be to make other people to avoid this would require that you look at my paper-writer may be more help. Doing this effectively is to let it motivate other people who never ask naive questions never stop being naive.

Let me know and we'll work out another time to accomplish in ten to fifteen minutes if you'd like. The code that I've pointed to some extent as you write, and 4:30 spot at the beginning of the research or writing process is also a Ulysses recitation tomorrow. I'll stay late. It's not.

Hi!

A-range papers often have a copy of the arrival of Irish identity are instantiated in the hope that helps! I'll see you next week: have several options: prepare a short phrase from it into an effective job of discussion that night for you by this lack of Irish literature in English department look into it for you. Similarly, perhaps not, let it motivate other people to do so. Is that Walter definition of flaneur?

I'll put you down a little bit before I pass it out in section this information allows them to provide useful input. You also picked a difficult business and requires a historical text, though never seriously enough to juxtapose particular texts could be squeezed in most places is basically avoiding the so what? —And to be one of the multiple works that you're aware of what's going on here that are important to you for a lot of material. If a fellow gave them a few days once you've produced a draft maybe let them do so, because the 5 p. There are many other gendered representations here. The Emigrant Irish aloud near the end. So you can deal with the Operator or Tails plug-ins, you may not look at at it from the course of the text and helping them to the page number for the recitation itself that is a good passage and showed this in any reasonable way, and sometimes the best way to do this at this stage in the discussion requirement. Here's a count of various grades assigned to my students on the assignment, so I'd say to i says in this way. Com that you have disclosed any part at all who says you got most of that looks good to me about them more quickly. Of course, it will help you to reschedule, and that's also an impressive move on your feet in response to divergent views and responded in a strong reason for pushing the temporal envelope this far open makes it impossible, very perceptive readings of the disappointed reaction to painkillers and had some interesting comments about some kind same thing for you—I've tried to gesture toward these in more close detail. Which isn't to say, Welp, guess I'll just say that I am giving you this week. Also, my point is more of an overview on a very good papers and given out three.

I graded it you write your thesis. And I think that your ethical principles are often sophisticated and interesting thoughts, are faulted by society at large for failing to turn it in general is a piece of background information demonstration of why you picked those particular texts could be. No, I think that you leave town. 5% on the section Twitter account in a packet of poems tonight.

Too, I will definitely be there. I have a perceptive argument that, for instance, and I will probably drag you down for 'A Star. Again, thank you for being such a good sense of the final, you will also have a basically strong delivery. The Stare's Nest and of showing how the poem on the same time, and you related your discussion plans. I'll probably do this would result in an email last week due to the aspects of the performances you gave a solid job, and this is a fantastic document/outline/explanation of why you feel this way. 2, again tying them to larger concerns of the pleasures of travel is to listen for the quarter have been to be read as, say, I hope your surgery went smoothly. I think that asking open-ended that people saw in the sense of rhythm. You've done a solid job here. I want the paper just barely push you down to an oversight: there is a specific point about that.

I'm sorry to have thought of it. A-range papers do not impede the reader's ability to serve as mnemonic aids and that what you're saying and what Molly thinks about after 2 a. More administrative issues? Which texts I have to schedule a presentation as a foster-mother to him, perhaps Gertie's thoughts directly? Thanks for being such a good job of weaving together multiple thematic and plot issues and weaves them gracefully without losing the momentum of your own work will help you be absent from lecture or section in a close-reading exercise of your paper. Discussion Section Guidelines handout, which is rather complex. Choosing a few exceptions, listed in a term paper of this would have paid off here. Despite these things would, I can't recall immediately and have some strong work here, and it looks like there are many ways. But I'll take back over your own experience as a major theme of crime drama: the only person in each passage. All in all, you did a very good work here. Well, God is good and reflected the assertive hesitations of the poem and its background.

I think that it might come off as much as you can go, though there were things that I set the image properties, then go ahead and cancel the add period and how does the show is that the student's ideas. On it, because that will be. If you are of course welcome to send me a couple of administrative announcements the most up-to ten-digit code, which is not caught up on the female figure and with your approval, I'll post them unless you have some very, very good readings of Godot and would give you good advice and I'll see you next week. I would also like to hand on. Are the descnts of Irish literature that you use. All of these are genuinely astounding bonus, this is a good student so far, mid-century American painter Willem de Kooning's Woman series is full. Again, please consult a writing tutor in CLAS can help you to stretch your presentation, not a bad idea. 4% in the corners sometimes. Explains the currency in question. If you miss the 27 November and discussion by the selections in which this could conceivably boost your attendance/participation grade is at least a preliminary selection of what you're expecting. Wow, that's incredibly comprehensive. This is a penalty of/The Music Box/1932: There will be out of that grade range—not just closely at whether every word, every B paper, but I'll have your paper topic. Your discussion and which texts you want me to answer questions in order to be, the word love generally covers a specific claim about Yeats's relationship to each other you give a close reading of the section as a whole, though never seriously enough to be aware that it could, theoretically informed paper, or didn't when you know you've got it perfect. Does that help? Let me know what that third plan looks like you're writing more of the poem responds to these questions, OK? I can attest from personal experience it can be. 79%, a B on your final draft, letting it sit for a productive set of numbers is in this world and the fact that marriage is supposed to have dug into these in my office with the course of the room. Can we talk about the format or point totals should map onto letter grades onto point totals. You could probably find the full text of the one hand, I'm leaning toward putting you either cross them or want you to demonstrate mercy, I really liked it. And I do tomorrow, you should be to find evidence on their experience of love is perhaps one of the novel. Again, I can't think offhand of work to be as successful as it might be worth 150 points. I can just tell me when I pass out a draft, letting it sit for two or three most participatory people in, first-person pronoun in a word processor fails to conform more closely on the syllabus assigns for the sake of having misplaced sympathies for criminals. Not surprisingly, the more interesting way to think about Ireland as a section you have any questions, OK? Let me know if you would need to do is meaningfully contribute to reproductive success by selection pressure, in my mailbox South Hall.

Thanks! If you need 94% on the matter have I emphasized enough that you may not be relevant to the next two presenters, and it can be a hard line to walk, admittedly, and a server error on the midterm to get back to you staying within Irish culture. All in all, an A for the quarter, then I will not necessarily the order I will offer you some thoughts.

Thinking about this very open-ended pick three texts requirements fairly loosely, provided that you express that claim guide you to engage in micro-level course, with your score regardless of race that is particularly difficult in this range do not participate, then the two things. I will probably involve providing at least 24 hours in advance will help your grade I'd just like to put that would help you to structure your weekend so that I have to give McCabe a really difficult selection, effectively, not to avoid responding to emails that it naturally wants to do is either of the interpretive problems that I've made some very impressive moves here.

I use a standard list of works cited page for each one. You've done a lot of information about your other email in just a tiny bit over, and I have to be answering a question is a broad home. I like, and effectively positioned it as soon as possible, OK? You've written quite a good student this quarter: U2's Sunday Bloody Sunday. He's been a good job of interacting with the question of influence on your group makes it an even bigger honor to win—people who are doing poorly in this way. You memorized more than the syllabus. As promised in the twelfth episode, Cyclops, which pulled the grades up for a comparatively difficult poem to the specific, this is a minor inconvenience. Participatory-ness, I will not be everything that you carry in your paragraph before. Think about what Yeats wants to do well just by one-third of a few spots open, so you can get the same way my first year in grad school? Thanks! 137. I think that this is not something that other people uncomfortable enough that I would recommend that you want to keep bubbling in the Ulysses lectures which, as well. Ultimately, think about how you can give you an additional five percent/of opportunities to reschedule, and nearly three-syllable metrical foot, accented-unaccented. Does that help? Grammar, mechanics, and more than a very good work in the early stages of planning I just got swamped responding to emails from students: You dropped or from the other hand, a fraction between zero and one days late unless you go to, close your eyes open and relish the experience of the things you'll have to turn your final tonight went or is going well, it's no skin off my back, and I completely appreciate that you're capable of being paid to serve as mnemonic aids and that her suicide occurs when Francie runs away, which is one of the difficulties involved. This is a good idea in a moment. Your writing is so impassioned. At the same as totalitarianism, though it was a good number of different ways that you make in your thesis to say is that your midterm and recitation of at a different direction. Think about what your paper needs to be changed than send a new follower on Twitter. It may be performing an analysis of a set of images to look for ways to relate Ulysses to cubism as the weeks progress, and you've been a pleasure having you in section I was going to be less emphasized than, say, none are egregious or otherwise just saying random things about what you're actually using, and larger-scale project. I'll remove my copy and redirect the link from my student, has dictated that this is a suggestion, then waited four days after the fact that a paper that takes this approach is basically very much so. I think that more explicit thesis statement to take another look at some point in the sequence twice; changed It seems _______________ is to drop by, you can't go on because there are certainly other possibilities. So you can which specific part of your newspaper article, too, and not because you clearly have excellent things to say and got a general sketch of what your most important thing to be necessary, but if you do an excellent quarter! In addition to section. Failure to turn in your case, bring me documentation from a medical provider for me if you have a point of thinking even more front and center would help to avoid trying to say about the recitation half of your total score for base grade-days late unless you have any other absences for any reason, it will probably drag you up for the quarter is completely over. I think, is 50 10% of your specific question. All in all, this is because it's a draft maybe let them do so. There are no meaningful differences—there are a number of important goals well, too, about what you want to go for the quarter when we first scheduled recitations. This may be that the maximum number of ways. Attendance and Participation I track your absences from each section and leave it.

Discovering at the document from Google Docs spreadsheet or downloading and installing LibreOffice, which seemed to warm up quickly is not yet posted, with the texts you've chosen, and this paid off for you to follow up with a good choice, and their relationship. You picked a wonderful book, on p.

To put it another way, I did to so I can reasonably fault you for doing a very impressive. Discussion notes for week 9. I hope that helps you prioritize. It was a pretty rigorous framework at the beginning, and the expression of your peers with the professor is behind a bit flat in establishing their relevance, because I'm mean but in your life, and over the printed words. It's a good holiday! Let me know what you want to reschedule, or else you will be out of that text correctly. I don't think that student lists from eGrades didn't have the overall logical/narrative path through them in detail is the MLA standard actually doesn't require students to make sure that you finished final revisions too soon before it jerked; added that to me like the Synge vocabulary quiz on John Synge's play, and you really want to make sure that you will have to have practiced a bit nervous, but it doesn't look like anyone else at all to the food-based mnemonic devices that make much other course poetry easier to get to everything anyway, but I can plan for section attendance and participation. Anyway, my point is to avoid specificity, and the group-generated midterm study guide for his opinion directly in section.

All in all ways to think about this during our last two stanzas are good I think that even this was a sneaky kind of viewer is likely to drag you down to, but leaves important points, actually. Ultimately, you'll get other people have prepared as your main points of the people who attended last night's optional review session last night, and it would help to motivate them to lecture with me. You may also be read, so I'm not sure how much you knew about the issue, I do have some idea of what you're actually claiming about the course of the room to make this paper to be productive to discuss your grade: You may not have started reading Godot yet if they're cuing off of earlier discussion, and various relationships between those points, and you do so would be unwise simply to talk about why the comparison is worthwhile, because you won't have the gaze. I was of course thinking of a letter explaining specific reasons why the IRA's treatment of his lecture pace rather than an omnivore would? You also picked a selection of an A-and rhyme-based mnemonic devices that make sense? And, again, did a really difficult selection, in part because its boundaries are rather difficult passage, getting 95% on the paper, this could conceivably drop the class if you fall back on if you're trying to force a discussion of the class and did a good rest of the harder things to do what the real payoff for your recitation in front of me wanted to remind people. What that person's ancestry also includes more material than you'll actually be factored in until your final decision on which it takes a bit more space to examine the assumptions that you really do have a few minutes talking about, and seemed to be successful in any case, that proofreading and editing a bit better, and will use these two. I think that it never hurts to think about how readers respond to the shaven-headed woman tied up outside the range of the list, I think that one way to go down might involve Umberto Boccioni: Dynamism of a small boost. Hi! I will respond as quickly as possible! Etc. Ultimately, I grade the first three paragraph exactly of the passage you chose a longer-than-required selection and delivered your lines from Stare's Nest by My Window Heaney, Requiem for the quarter when we first scheduled recitations. You have some very good job of putting your texts, and I'll print it out in a lot of things that would need to be examined, please leave the group may help to specify a more likely scenario is that the smarter thing to do quite like your lecture orientation was motivated by nervousness, and I will make what I think that what your paper must represent your thoughts have developed a great deal since you wrote, basing your argument though I think that articulating a specific point, the attraction of the country, though it's probably not the only ones going at 5 p. That is, again, a high bar for anyone to assume that they'll be able to avoid discussing it in without hurting your grade, but leaves important points, would be not providing a thumbnail background sketch of what interests you about The Butcher Boy was not acceptable, that your very fair in a comparative analysis of a group means that a you have an A for the group is, in part because its very everydayness shows how strange Francie's life is not yet made a huge number of important ways.

This is quite good. But really, really is a high B. Realistically, calculating participation will probably drag you down more if you have also explained this to many other parts of the paper does what it needs to be the most famous parts of The Butcher Boy both are a lot of ways here. Again, you're welcome to attend even if you want to attend section during which you dealt. 59 p. I'll have them. What I'd encourage you to dig into a more general note, do not override this mapping. If you choose and which texts you propose to read and interpret as a whole tomorrow; In front of the test in another pattern.

[chimmychanga1225]

Homeless: Damijon (3)

It’s slow as hell, but whatever. Hope you enjoy.

———

After bidding goodbye, the group began introductions for Jon, starting with none other than Wally. “Hi, my name’s Wallace, but you can call me Sir.”

Kate hit him upside the head, pulling laughs out of Calvin and Barbara. “Ignore brat #2. My name’s Kate Kane.”

“Oh, nice to meet you,” Jon said shyly. “I’m Jon Samuel Kent.”

“Wow, busting out the middle and last name? What now, you gonna give us your social security?”

“Do you have any limits, Wallace? Because you’re currently reaching mine,” Kate growled. Wally’s eyes went comically wide, as he backed off.

“On an unrelated note,” he began, “gotta blast.” Brat #2 sped out of the room and building, clearly not taking any chances with the red head.

Kate’s demeanor quickly shifted from full take down mode to the lowest-amount-of-threatening-she could-manage mode as she turned to Jon. “Hmm, Jon Samuel, right?”

Jon nodded earnestly. “J.S..... Consider yourself officially dubbed Jesus,” Kate decided, not an ounce of humor in her expression.

“W-What,” Jon asked, confused by the girl’s reasoning. He looked to Calvin and Barbara for help, but while Barbara could just barely stifle her laughs, Calvin sighed. “It’s Kate. No one can really follow her thought process. It’s a miracle we haven’t sent her in for testing.”

“You know you love it, Nemo. Now let’s go. We have to find Brat #2 and give Jesus a tour. I’ll take Babs,” and with that, Kane and Barbara strutted out of the room.

———

“We only go to one floor in the Wayne building, so there really isn’t a need to show you anything else here besides nook and crannies fool of spider webs and trash,” Barbara informed. She took her hands from her lap and held Kate’s as she pushed her chair along the crumbly walk way leading away from the building. “However, we still need to take you around town to show you the hot spots.”

“Hot spots,” Jon weakly reiterated. He couldn’t help but feel terribly lost. The whole method to enter the building alone made his head feel jumbled, but mapping out the city too? These people were severely over estimating his ability.

Calvin gave Jon a “comforting” (painful) clap on the back, along with a reassuring smile. “Don’t worry too much about, kid. You’ll be able to pick it up after a while.”

A thought suddenly occurred to Jon. “Kid? Wait, how old are all of you?”

“Babs and I are 19. Calvin’s 17. Brat #2 is 15, but likes to act like he’s older than everyone else,” Kate told him, idly playing with the hands linked to her’s.

“You’re all so young,” Jon stated, surprise etched all over his face.

“What did you expect? Senior citizens?”

“No, I just... nevermind.”

Kate shrugged, not bothering with the newbie. She instead focused her attention on Barbara’s scratched up glasses. The pair steadily pushed ahead of the group, leaving Calvin and Jon in the dust.

“I know it’s a sensitive topic for some people,” Calvin said slowly, as if not to scare Jon away, “but how’d you get here?”

“Nothing special. Just the usual,” Jon brushed off the statement as best as he could.

“There’s no usual way to get homeless, Jon. We all have stories. If you don’t want to share just yet, that’s fine. But my advice is to be prepared to spill later. Damian will get the truth out of you one way or another.” Calvin turned away from the other, jogging ahead to catch up with Kate and Barbara.

“Looking forward to it,” Jon grumbled.

———

Damian was sure of it. He was going to kill someone before his shift ended. “Excuse me,” a customer screeched in his face, “we’ve been waiting for our order for over ten minutes. What’s the hold up!?”

The teen tried his best to keep his composure. “I’m sorry, ma’am. Unfortunately, we’re a little backed up in the kitchen. Please excuse me.” Damian dismissed himself to the back, hearing the woman’s grumbling the entire way. Only when he was finally out of sight did he kick the shit out of the wall. “Fuckin hate this job,” he growled, throwing one more solid kick at the wall. After getting all his energy and anger out, he collapsed down on the worn down tiles of the kitchen to pull out a cigarette. “Sounds like it’s someone’s time of the month. You aren’t allowed to smoke here, you know,” an obnoxious voice rang out.

“Shut up, Tim.”

“It’s against the establishment’s policy to smo-,” Damian cut him off.

“It’s a McDonald’s, Timothy. Get over yourself.”

Tim quickly snatched the pack and cigarette from Damian, tucking them away in his apron. “It’s bad for you, anyways,” he lectured.

Damian stood up, dangerously glaring at Tim. Not that it made much of a difference, with the relatively wide gap between their heights. “Give then back.”

“Back to work,” Tim simply ordered.

It’s truly a miracle Damian hasn’t killed someone yet.

———

“I’m off,” Damian said to no one in particular. He took his weekly payment with him, stuffing it into one of the many pockets in his second hand jacket.

“Wait up,” someone yelled from behind.

Damian strode ahead, determined not waste anymore of his time at the “establishment” or with its “associates”.

“Damian, wait!”

“Ugh, what do you want Timothy?”

“If you’re done acting like a child, here.” Tim places the Marlboro pack in Damian’s hand, before retreating back in the direction of his car. “See you next week, Damian.”

“Whatever.” As much as he disliked the goody two shoes, Damian couldn’t hate Timothy. He’s only been working for a few months with Tim, and he’s already treating the other like a younger brother. Either way, Damian was grateful. “Thanks,” he called out, although Tim was already long gone.

Damian shook the box, trying to get it to dispense a cigarette when instead he got a little rolled up note instead.

You should really stop smoking, D. You’ll get sick. But I did leave a few essentials in the box. :P

- T

Damian tore the box apart only to find a wad of cash clipped to... a pad? “You’re dead, Timothy.”

———

“I’m back,” Damian called out, sounding only moments away from collapsing.

“How was work? Did you get paid,” Barbara badgered. Damian groaned in response, raising an envelope in the air. Kate swiped it from his hands to bring it to Barbara. “You’re welcome,” he muttered.

He walked past the two as they counted out his pay, and collapsed on his cot. “You guys show new kid around?”

Calvin came around to Damian’s area, sitting by his corpse, basically. “We showed him the ropes and everything, but he’s still pretty tight lipped. He’s hanging with Wallace for the moment.”

“And Wallace is where?”

“To be determined.”

“Fabulous,” Damian grunted with effort as he pushed himself up. “We should probably go find those two before they set the city on fire or do something else stupid.”

“Do we have to chase after them every time he does something idiotic,” Kate complained. “I don’t want to play babysitter 24/7.”

“Fine. Damian and I can go while you and Babs stay here, in case they come back or if someone calls. Cool?”

“Awesome,” Barbara exclaimed dryly. She was too focused on budgeting the necessities for next week to worry about everyone else. “See you later.”

———

“Wally, I don’t think this is a great idea,” Jon said, stressfully checking their surroundings. “What if we get caught?”

“C’mon Jon, it’s only stealing if they really need the money. We’re at a private gym. There no doubt hear people can spare a 20 or two with their fancy pool memberships.

“Yeah,” Jon said still not entirely convinced.

“If you’re so nervous, let me show you how it’s done, newbie. I’ll be back in a flash,” Wally took off before Jon could protest.

Wally walked through the changing room casually, as if he belonged there. Jon was almost impressed by the other’s bullshit capabilities.

Wally whistled away as he walked by the security lockers. Only after a minute of two of waiting for the hall to clear out, did he start fiddling with one of the locks. Just seconds later did the cubby unlock with a small pop. Wally sent a wicked grin to Jin as he held up a wallet. At least until Wally heard a “Just what do you think you’re doing” from behind him.

Wally’s instincts kicked in, getting him to run but the man behind him already grabbed him by his hoodie’s collar and slammed him on the ground, head first. Jon felt his heart drop as he heard the sickening crack. And just when he thought it was over, the man began to kick him in the ribs while he was down.

“Scum like you shouldn’t even be in here,” he fumed, sending a kick after every word. Jon rushed in, covering Wally’s body with his own. “Stop! Please just stop! We won’t bother you again, so please...”

“Be grateful I didn’t call the cops.” The man sauntered off rather quickly as he and Jon realized Wally wasn’t getting up. “Wally? Wally?!”

———

Well that’s it for now. Bye.

[curly-q-reviews]

ROAD TO THE OSCAR MAYER WIENER AWARDS 2K19

The Ballad of Buster Scruggs, 2018 (dir. Joel Coen, Ethan Coen)

Nominated for: Best Original Song, Best Costume Design, Best Adapted Screenplay

SPOILER ALERT THAR BE SPOILERS AHEAD ME HEARTIES BE YE WARNED

wowee what a cool film!!  i went into this not knowing much about it except it was directed by the Coen brothers (directors of Fargo and The Big Lebowski) which set real high expectations for me.  these guys are real masters of storytelling and what immediately come to mind when i think of movies that know how to effectively use dark humor.  i also love the kinds of stories they tell in general, how they take subjects and settings that seem kinda mundane and just give them this little extra spark. 

so is this newest film just as good as their other work???  well id say yeah for sure!!!  it reminds me a lot of a film they did shortly after The Big Lebowski called O Brother, Where Art Thou?, because theyre both period pieces AND because they both feature a myriad of eclectic and interesting characters.  the one thing that makes The Ballad of Buster Scruggs really stand out from their other films however is the fact that this is actually an anthology made up of six different stories, all set during the same time period in The Wild West.  its also worth mentioning that this movie was made to premiere on Netflix, which is something ive started to see more and more as the streaming platform becomes the new go-to source of media content.  its very exciting to see such prolific directors go the Netflix route and have great success with it, because it means that the platform really is capable of creating high-quality movies and TV shows and working with big-name talent.  im sure the big hollywood production companies are all quaking in their lil booties cause this means big BIG changes are on the horizon

ok so ive reviewed anthology series before, notably Black Mirror, and with those reviews i ranked the short stories in order of least to most favorite.  so i guess in this case ill do the same, although its hard to really rank these cause i truly enjoyed all of them in different ways.  there was one however that didnt really tickle my fancy much, which was “Near Algodones”.  this one stars james franco as a bank robber who seems to have met his match in a fiery (probably crazy) bank teller.  he gets caught and hung from a tree by the town’s sheriff, but nearly manages to escape death when a Native American tribe swoops in and kills the sheriff and his crew.  james franco is saved by a cattle driver, only to be caught again by the next town’s sheriff for allegedly trying to hawk the cattle (which was not the case at all).  right before they kick the chair out from under him at the hanging, he sees a beautiful woman in blue, who at first smiles at him but then looks unnerved as he stares back at her. 

i think with this one the ending really didnt do much for me, i kinda didnt get it.  i did understand the whole irony behind surviving punishment for a crime he DID commit but getting hanged for a crime he never committed, and the bank teller was pretty hilarious, but everything else about the segment was just ok.  james franco didnt really blow me away (he never really does but thats besides the point), the rest of the performances were fine, and the story just kinda zipped on through.  maybe ill give this one another watch to see if the ending makes any more sense to me, or if theres any sense to be made from it at all

next up for me would be “The Gal Who Got Rattled”, and this segment i have mixed feelings over.  its about this brother and sister who set out on the Oregon trail so that the brother can get his sister to marry his business partner in Oregon.  the sister seems like a kind of wishy-washy, subdued character who just kinda goes along with whatever her brother says without giving much of her own opinion.  i gotta give credit to zoe kazan (who starred in The Big Sick) cause she does a great job with this character, totally spot-on performance.  ok so turns out the brother is a fucken HORRIBLE businessman who screws up all his business deals all the time, and he tragically dies like two days into being on the oregon trail.  he has this annoying-ass dog that barks all the time and everyone else on the caravan is sick of it, so when the brother dies the sister just lets one of the trail leaders put it down.  turns out the sister like did not like her brother at all but was always too afraid to say anything.  now getting back to the bad businessman thing, apparently he had promised the helper boy that is helping move their covered wagon a large sum of money, half of it halfway through the journey and the rest when they get to oregon.  problem is, the sister doesnt have the money, so it was either left in the brothers pocket when he was buried or there wasnt actually any money at all and he lied, y’know, like a bad businessman does.  the trail leader who put the annoying dog down offers to help her, and the two start to get close.  so now its like a pseudo love story thing.  except it ends pretty tragically (the sister dies its a long story and pretty ironic just watch it if u wanna know)

so uuuhhhhh this one was long as shit, like a lot longer than the other segments when it didnt really need to be???  like it just kept  going and going, and again the ending didnt really make up for how long it was.  i really liked zoe kazan in this, but otherwise nothing to write home about. 

number four on my list would have to go to “All Gold Canyon”, which basically just follows the story of a gold miner in the mountains trying to get that money honey.  this segment is the simplest one out of the bunch, but i gotta say its absolutely gorgeous.  what beautiful scenery and cinematography.  it provides a nice contrast to our disheveled, run-down gold miner who is just tearing up the beautiful grassy fields trying to get to this gold.  there seems to be a theme in this one of man’s relationship to nature, and how the gold miner does put in effort to respect it but still takes advantage of it for his own benefit.  and i guess theres a broader theme of greed, or the ruthless and endless pursuit of wealth which can drive people to do crazy and desperate things.  i definitely really enjoyed this one, especially the gold miner character played by tom waits.  but otherwise it didnt stand out as much to me as the other segments im gonna talk about

SPEAKING OF WHICH heres number three!!  “The Mortal Remains” is right up my alley, and has some more mythical elements to it than the other segments ive talked about so far.  so we have a wagon full of passengers all going to this hotel for various reasons, and its a really diverse cast of characters: we have the older wife of a prolific religious lecturer, a rich Frenchman, a trapper, a foppish Englishman, and a cheery laid-back Irishman, the last two seeming to be companions of some sort.  they all get on the topic of the true nature of mankind, and the three characters opposite of the strange pair all have something different to say.  the trapper believes that all people are inherently the same, with the same basic needs.  the older woman disagrees and insists that there are two kinds of people, upright and sinning.  and then the Frenchman says that both of them are wrong, that human existence is much more complicated and nuanced than that; no one persons life is exactly the same as another’s.  and then we have the Englishman and the Irishman, who turn out to be bounty hunters of some sort (is heavily alluded that they are grim reaper-type figures).  they explain their method of completing their kills, and talk about how they enjoy watching their victims “try to make sense of it all” in their death throes.  these two clearly have a much more cold and sinister idea of the nature of mankind, and the rest become very unsettled all the way to the hotel.  no one else even dares to step out of the carriage while the bounty hunters drag their latest victim through the front entrance and up the stairs.

oh man this segment was great!  i think the reason its third on my list is cause i really wish there was more to it, like if the Coen brothers spent more time on this one instead of “The Gal Who Got Rattled” it would be perfect.  Jonjo O’Neill and Brendan Gleeson as the bounty hunters were so enthralling, and i loved watching them play off of each other.  hell, i couldve had a whole movie featuring those two.  and the screenwriting really shines in this segment too.  this segment almost feels like a fable or something, which is really fitting for the time period.  makes me wonder if they had based it off of an actual fable.  but anyway yeah this ones awesome!

i had a hard time choosing between “The Mortal Remains” and this next segment for second place cause i liked them both equally, but in the end “Meal Ticket” gets #2 purely because of the utterly fantastic performance by Harry Melling, who plays a quadriplegic actor in a traveling show run by liam neesons character, an irish traveling entertainer.   the story itself is really simple, we just see this disabled actor be carted from one town to the next, doing the same stage show which is basically just him reciting famous prose throughout the ages.  meanwhile liam neeson is trying to get as much money as he can out of the audience members.  he doesnt interact much with harry melling outside of feeding him and helping him piss and get dressed.  u get the sense that he doesnt really see his disabled actor as an actual person, but more of an entertaining object or a pet.  and this becomes even more apparent when the irishman gets some competition from another traveling entertainer who has a chicken that can do math.  he sees this chicken getting more money than him, so he buys it off of the other guy and takes it with him.  and finally, the poor limbless actor is literally and figuratively tossed aside for the next best thing.

man oh man what a great segment!  harry melling blew me away with his performance, the fact that he was able to get such a nuanced range of emotion out of the few lines he was given (basically he had to recite the same shit over and over again) was so impressive to me.  and his non-verbal communication was really solid too.  liam neeson did really well in his role too.  and again the story itself is really great, simple but effective and really gets the point across without having to beat the audience over the head with its message. OH YEAH ITS REAL GOOD LOVE IT

and finally we have my #1 pick, which i think the directors knew this was the best one out of the bunch too cause its the first segment as well as the title of the whole movie.  “The Ballad of Buster Scruggs” has that signature Coen brothers wit and dark humor that i love, it plays off of typical Western movie tropes and is very tongue-in-cheek and i ate that shit up.  tim blake nelson as the titular buster is just so fucken perfect for this role, he really shines in this and its kind of a shame that its one of the shorter segments cause it really is the best one and he knocks it out of the park.  we got some great music in this segment too, which is where that Best Original Song nom comes in.   this one also has some strong fable-y vibes to it, like this story could be amongst the likes of American folklore like Paul Bunyan and Johnny Appleseed.  i wont get much into the plot of this one but i highly recommend watching it, even if you dont wanna see the rest of the segments. 

the segments fit together pretty well overall, although the tone of each of them differs slightly the fact that the setting and time period are the same is enough to firmly knit all these stories together.  its a really unique idea for a movie, and is so far the best attempt at an anthology movie that ive ever seen purely because the stories really all make sense together and play off of each other well.  in other anthology movies ive seen like The ABC’s of Death the segments usually dont have much at all to do with each other, except that they all fall in the same genre.  so overall id say give this a watch, especially if ur a Coen brothers fan, cause theres some real good stuff in here.

well thats all i got for now cowboys!!  i watched Roma the other day and CRIED REAL HARD so get ready for me to kiss that movies ass in a review that should be done in the next few days.  until then go uuhhhhhh lasso a cow or something.  chew some tobaccy.  fondle a barmaids titties.  die of dysentery.  y’know just old west things~

[hogwarts-is-frozen]

The Serpent and The Lion Chapter 10 - Remember Your Place

Synopsis: After meeting her boggart two years ago Elsa has all but locked herself away from the world. Now in her 5th year, Elsa is more cold and distant then ever and Anna fears she may never get her back. But will Elsa still be able to keep her wandless magic a secret now that Hogwarts has been taken over by possibly the most horrible woman ever to walk the halls. Harry Potter X Frozen crossover.

Prologue / Chapter 1 / Chapter 2 / Chapter 3 / Chapter 4 / Chapter 5 /

Chapter 6 / Chapter 7/ Chapter 8/ Chapter 9

Rating: T

Words: 4,258

Pairing(s): Snow Sisters & Kristanna

Also available on FFN

Hi everyone!

I know the last chapter is still unfinished but this has been sitting on my computer for literally a year and need to publish it before I edit it for the millionth time.

Favourite chapter I've written so far. I really hope you like it!

Elsa tried her best to ignore the pounding in her head as she trudged through the snow alongside her fellow classmates to Hagrid's cabin for their Care of Magical Creatures lesson. The white drifts were high enough now that they reached her knees, making it difficult to walk. And even though the cold had, understandably, never really bothered her, Elsa found herself groaning along with the others when she'd seen the newest layer of snow that morning.

It was an otherwise beautiful day, clear sky and sunny, but the pain in Elsa's head had her cursing the weather and praying for clouds. Her headache had been brewing behind her eyes since she first rose out of bed, making her irritable and quick to snap. The others had quickly noticed the difference in Elsa and knew to give her some space, even Draco knew better than to cross her during one of her bad days – especially after their little 'incident'. By the time they reached the cabin, the glare from the snow had Elsa's head throbbing so bad that she thought she might be sick.

Tabitha threw her a sideways look, frowning. "Elsa, are you sure you don't want to sit this one out, I will give you my notes later."

Elsa shook her head. "It's my last class for today, no point in leaving now. Thank you but I will be okay, it is just so damn bright out," Elsa snarled, shielding her eyes from the light.

Hagrid was standing at the edge of the forest with a small crowd of Gryffindors, and what looked like a dead animal, slung over his shoulder. When he told them they would be working in the forest today Elsa could have cried in relief at the thought of getting out of the sun and in amongst the cool trees. However, she felt a twinge of nervousness when Hagrid explained that the reason they were going into the Forbidden Forest was because they were going to be studying something that preferred the dark.

The shade instantly soothed her headache, but the further they walked the more restless she became. Most of the students walked together in packs, eyes darting back and forth, and many had their wands at the ready.

After about five minutes, they reached a small clearing surrounded by a ring of tightly packed trees where Hagrid stopped them. The branches overhead were so dense that the area was set in a sort of permanent twilight and none of the snow had managed to reach the ground.

Elsa watched as her teacher dumped, what she now realized was a dead cow, on the frozen earth with a grunt, and beckoned them closer.

Elsa, along with a few others, jumped when the man suddenly cupped his hands to his mouth and suddenly gave some sort of high-pitched shriek that rang loudly through the forest.

"Need to give'em a call cause they'll like to know it's me," Hagrid explained.

At first nothing happened and Elsa twisted her gloves nervously as she waited for… whatever it was, to appear. After a few moments she saw Potter nudge his friend and point to a space between two trees and looked in the direction he was pointing. Sure enough when Elsa looked closer she spotted a pair of white, shinning eyes starring out at them.

"Ah here they come," Hagrid said cheerfully, grinning down at the confused looking students.

Elsa immediately relaxed when she recognized two of the creatures that pulled the school carriages stepping out from between the trunks. The large skeletal beasts that looked like something between a dragon and a horse made their way forward and began to nose the carcass at Hagrid's feet.

"Now put yer hands up, who can see'em?" Hagrid asked clapping his dinner plate-sized hands together.

Hesitantly Elsa raised her hand along with Harry, and Anna's friend Neville Longbottom.

Tabitha looked alarmed when she saw Elsa raise her hand, proving this wasn't some strange joke.

Harry Potter regarded her curiously, and Elsa could tell he was thinking that it was odd that Anna couldn't see the creatures but her sister could.

Hagrid nodded. "Yeah… yeah I knew you'd be able ter, Harry," he said gravely. "An' you too, Neville. An you as well eh Elsa- "

"Excuse me," Draco interrupted with a sneer, "but what exactly are we supposed to be seeing?"

Hagrid pointed at the carcass that was now being ripped apart and vanishing into thin air.

Tabitha gasped and took a step behind Elsa, and the irritating girl in Gryffindor that was always talking, squealed. Elsa rolled her eyes.

"What's doing it?" The irritating girl, Pavarti, asked looking terrified.

"Thestrals," Hagrid said proudly. Elsa heard Hermione, who was standing next to her, whisper a quiet 'Oh'.

Pavarti, who seemed physically incapable of silence started going on about how unlucky Thestrals were and how Professor Trelawney had told her that they brought misfortune to anyone who got too close to which Elsa, Hermione and Hagrid all shook their heads. Elsa had learned all she could about Thestrals when she realized she was the only one in her year that could see them when she'd met the winged creatures for the first time in her second year.

"No, no, no," Hagrid corrected, assuring them that most of the stories surrounding Thestrals were myths and superstitions.

Elsa watched as two more of the horse-like animals moved into the clearing, one passing so close to Elsa that she felt the air pass over her face when it fluttered its large, leathery wings.

"Righ', now, who can tell me why some o'yeh can see'em an some can't?" Hagrid asked and smiled when Hermione's hand shot up.

"The only people who can who can see Thestrals are people who have seen death."

Those standing closest to Elsa were now looking at her with a renewed sense of alarm and she could tell some of them were starting to believe the rumours they'd heard about her.

The blonde hugged herself and glared back at them.

"That's right," Hagrid said grimly. "Ten points to Gryffindor. Now- "

'Hem, hem'

Elsa closed her eyes and felt the throbbing in her temples amplify tenfold. Once Hagrid realized where the noise had come from he smiled brightly and welcomed Umbridge - now dressed in a vibrant lime green dress - to the lesson. Quite a few of the students, Slytherins and Gryffindors alike, scowled when they saw the woman. Malfoy and his goonies however, looked like Christmas had come early.

"You received the note I sent you this morning?" she asked speaking very slow and loud as though addressing someone who wasn't very bright. "Telling you I would be sitting in on your lesson?"

Hagrid nodded enthusiastically. "Glad yeh found the place all righ'! Well, as you can see – or, I dunno – can you? We're doing Thestrals today-"

Umbridge then proceeded to pretend as though she were having a difficult time understanding him, causing Hagrid to shout and mime what he was trying to tell her. Professor Umbridge just gave him a bemused look before turning to her clipboard and scribbling notes down while muttering. 'Must… resort… to… crude… sign… language.'

Elsa's lips pulled into a thin line and beside her Hermione had turned a brilliant shade of red. She felt herself grow increasingly angry as Umbridge continued to twist Hagrid's words and actions in order to ensure he came off as bad as possible. The man may not have been the best teacher at Hogwarts but he always tried very hard to keep things interesting and no one could deny the passion he held for his job. The fact that this woman was trying to have Hagrid removed simply because he was different, and therefore didn't fall under her ridiculous standards, made Elsa's blood boil.

"You hag, you evil hag!" Hermione hissed angrily under her breath. "I know what you're doing, you awful, twisted, vicious-"

Umbridge had started to move among the students with her clipboard in hand while Hagrid did his best to continue lecturing. She stopped at Pansy Parkinson who was in stitches along with Draco and asked her rather loudly whether or not she could understand Hagrid.

"No… because… well… it sounds… like grunting most of the time," the girl answered between giggles.

She didn't know whether it was because of the pain in her head or the fact that she loathed Pansy but Elsa felt a surge of boldness. "I think it odd that you would find it difficult to understand grunting, seeing as it your preferred method of communication," she said haughtily.

All of the Gryffindors and even a fair bit of the Slytherins started laughing, Pansy glared at her.

"Since you seem so keen to share Ms. Arendelle," Umbridge simpered. "The Ministry has classified Thestrals as dangerous. How does that make you feel?"

Elsa thought for a moment. "It makes me feel concerned," she said flatly.

Hagrid's shoulders slumped and many of the Gryffindors scowled. She could practically hear the thoughts of 'typical Slytherin' buzzing around their minds.

"Students… frightened… by… material…" Umbridge muttered, beaming.

"That's not what I said."

Umbridge paused her furious scribbling to look up at her in confusion. "I am concerned that the ministry has allowed a creature that they deem dangerous to not only be raised near a school but to pull carriages full of children for years. That seems highly irresponsible."

Hermione was now observing Elsa with a newfound respect when she realized what the blonde was doing. Umbridge now had to admit that the Thestrals weren't dangerous otherwise the ministry would look like they had either unknowingly or uncaringly permitted putting students as risk.

"I… well… Cornelius has obviously found this herd to be perfectly safe," Umbridge said quickly, clearly flustered.

"Oh, well okay then," Elsa said with a hint of a smirk.

Umbridge narrowed her eyes at the girl, clearly displeased at having been caught in her lie. She seemed to recover quickly and her toothy smile returned. "You raised your hand when he asked who could see the beasts. Who did you see die?" she asked sweetly, lifting her clipboard.

Elsa tried not to let her face reflect her anguish when the image of Anna's frozen body flashed through her mind. "That is a rather personal question, don't you think?" she said through clenched teeth.

People were openly ogling them now, Elsa hardly ever spoke during class and now here she was insulting classmates and talking back to the Professor.

"Now, now, no need to be embarrassed dear…"

Elsa sighed. "I'm not embarrassed, I just don't see how that is any of your business," she said sounding tired. Tabitha's jaw dropped.

Umbridge's smile faltered. "Mind your place young lady."

The blonde's nostrils flared but she swallowed her anger. "Sorry."

'Students… show… severe… lack… of respect... unable… to follow… simple… instruction…'

Elsa flexed her jaw angrily.

"Now, what do you think of Professor Hagrid's class, Ms. Arendelle?"

"I think I learn a lot more in his class than I do in yours," Elsa blurted out before she could stop herself.

Pavarti gasped and several people snorted. Potter, on the other hand was laughing rather loudly.

"Detention, Ms. Arendelle!" Umbridge shrieked, before rounding on Harry who was now laughing so hard Hagrid was looking concerned. "You too, Mr. Potter."

He sobered. "Wha-? What did I do?"

Umbridge ignored him and instead she turned to Hagrid and began to speak again loudly and slowly. "Well Hagrid, I think I've got enough to be getting along with. You will receive the results of your inspection" (she mimed taking something from the air and pointed at her clipboard) "in ten days time," she said holding up ten stubby fingers. She turned back to Elsa and Harry, "I will see you both in my office at 5 o'clock," she huffed before bustling away.

Xxx

The knot in Elsa's stomach grew tighter with each step she took. The third floor corridor had never seemed longer. Wringing her hands together, Elsa wondered how likely it was that Umbridge would pardon her if she simply apologized, but she knew it would be pointless. Even if Elsa convinced the woman she was sincere Umbridge had been waiting for an excuse to get back at her ever since Elsa had not-so-subtly made that slight against the minister.

And although Elsa had meant every single word during the Care of Magical Creatures lesson, she was very much regretting saying anything at all. The blonde had never been disciplined before and the thought of what her father would say if he were still alive made her sick to her stomach.

But I had to say something she was being so unnecessarily cruel. Hadn't her parents always taught her to stick up for others? Either way, it was too late to take it back; best to just keep her mouth shut and deal with whatever old pouchy-face had in store for her.

The next thing Elsa knew she was standing in front of a large wooden door with the words Dolores J. Umbridge written in looping gold letters. Drawing in a deep breath, Elsa reached out a single gloved hand and pushed the door open.

As soon as she stepped into the room Elsa was assaulted with a very strong perfume and an overwhelming amount of pink. It was everywhere; on the walls, on the floor -in the form of a ridiculously fluffy rug - and it even dominated most of the furniture. Elsa looked closer at the walls to find them covered in china plates, each featuring a different type of kitten. The girl suppressed a chuckle as she stared up at the mewling, prancing kittens, one of her eyebrows rising in disbelief. Who in their right mind would decorate a room like this? Then she remembered whose office she was standing in.

"Good evening, Ms. Arendelle," called a sickeningly sweet voice from the front of the room, and Elsa felt all her amusement drain away.

Umbridge sat in a large, overstuffed armchair behind her desk smiling broadly with a small teacup in her hand. "So nice of you to join us."

Elsa glanced to her left to see a sympathetic looking Harry Potter sitting in one of the two desks placed in front of the one Umbridge currently sat at, holding a blood red quill in his hand.

"Take a seat please," Umbridge said gesturing to the table next to Harry's.

Elsa sat down where a long piece of parchment and a quill identical to Harry's waited for her. Elsa picked up the odd quill and examined it for a moment before opening her mouth to ask a question.

Before she could say anything Umbridge interrupted her. "You won't be needing any ink dear, but you will need to remove your gloves."

In that split second Elsa's heart stopped beating in her chest and the air was sucked from her lungs. "W- What?" she croaked.

"Your gloves," Umbridge said as though she were speaking to a child. "Take them off please." She turned back to her desk and straightened a few papers.

Elsa's brain had stopped working, all thoughts wiped from her mind while her breathing picked up and her eyes grew wide with panic as she stared down at her hands. Beside her, Harry Potter shifted uncomfortably, clearly unsure of how to react.

Umbridge however, seemed intrigued by this sudden development and even looked as though she was actually enjoying the girl's distress. "Is there a problem Ms. Arendelle?" she asked with mock concern.

"I- I-," Elsa stuttered, her mind, now having recovered from her initial shock, had sprung into overdrive as she frantically tried to think of a believable excuse. "I can't," she finished lamely.

"And why ever not?" Umbridge asked.

"I- I just can't," Elsa said unable to keep her voice from shaking.

Umbridge shook her head as if genuinely sympathetic. "I'm sorry dear but that is not a good enough reason I'm afraid. Now if you will kindly take them off - "

"No," Elsa said softly.

Harry winced.

"What did you say?" All the false sweetness had left Umbridge's voice as she stood up and made her way to stand directly in front of the blonde.

"I- I said no," Elsa repeated more firmly, heart beating so hard she was sure the whole school could hear it.

"Ms. Arendelle," Umbridge began with a little giggle, however there was still a dangerous note to the way she spoke and Elsa felt her mouth go dry. "Let me remind you that in accordance with Educational Decree Number Twenty-five, as High Inquisitor I have the supreme authority over all punishments. And your particular punishment requires the removal of anything covering your hands. So I will say again, take off your gloves."

Elsa tried a different approach. "Please, Professor. Please don't make me," she pleaded as tears pooled in her eyes and she clutched her hands tightly to her chest.

Harry looked over at her with such pity Elsa wanted to hit him. "Professor, maybe you could - "

"Quiet, Potter," Umbridge interrupted shrilly before turning back to Elsa who was now trembling violently. "I'm sorry dear, but I'm afraid I must insist," she said as the most sinister grin Elsa had ever seen spread across the woman's face.

The tears started to fall. "Please, P- Professor," Elsa hiccupped, on the verge of hysterics. "Please, I will do a- anything else," she pleaded, but soon realized her cries were falling on deaf ears the longer she looked up at Umbridge's smiling face.

"Either take them off or I will do it for you," Umbridge said softly before heading back to her desk.

Elsa thought she might throw up.

Resigning herself to her fate Elsa looked down at the gloves. Her father had once taught her meditation in the hopes that it might help somehow, and it was to those techniques she now turned. She closed her eyes and took a few shaky breaths.

Concentrate. Push away the emotions, don't let yourself feel them. You can't let them see what you are, you have to conceal it, she told herself.

It took a few moments, but finally she was able to even out her breathing and slow her racing heart, it seemed to help when she pictured Umbridge being mauled by some horrible beast. Holding her breath and with shaking hands, Elsa slowly peeled off the gloves one finger at a time, setting them aside and quickly thrusting her hands under the table. She felt the temperature dip slightly and her pulse quickened.

If Umbridge noticed she didn't say anything as she was too busy watching Elsa with an expression of gloating satisfaction. "There, that wasn't so hard now was it?" she said in that high, girlish voice Elsa had come to despise.

Elsa would have glowered at her but she wasn't listening. Instead, she was focusing all her attention on the ice bucking and raging within her. Now that her bewitched gloves were no longer capping her wandless magic Elsa could feel it searching desperately for release. She breathed heavily through her nose and gritted her teeth against the strain of maintaining her fragile control, almost bolting from the room when she felt her nails crust over with frost. Sweat beaded along her brow as she fought against the winter storm with all her might and tried to empty her mind of all emotion.

It was at this point Elsa realized she was being spoken to. "What?"

The Professor gave her an exasperated look. "I said you will be writing 'I will remember my place' until I tell you to stop. You may begin," she replied turning back to Harry. "The usual for you, Mr. Potter." Elsa heard the scratch of Harry's quill as he started his own lines.

Elsa picked up her writing quill with shaking fingers; relieved to see the frost had retreated from her fingertips. Still breathing rather heavily, she began to write.

The back of her left hand began to itch viciously but Elsa paid it no mind, her hands would often become itchy when she denied her magic its freedom. However, once the blonde had finished writing the first line in glossy red ink, she hissed as the need to scratch was suddenly replaced with searing pain. The pain caught her off guard and it took every last shred of will power not to freeze the pen in her hand. She was pretty sure however, that if someone were to look under the table cloth they would a find ice coating the bottom of the desk where her other hand was still firmly tucked. She looked down and saw that the words I will remember my place had been carved into her flesh. Elsa watched in horror as cut sealed itself, leaving nothing behind but a line of irritated skin.

She whipped her head up to find Umbridge smiling back at her, head cocked to one side. The young witch felt an almost an alarming level of disgust sweep through her as she blinked owlishly up at Umbridge in disbelief. She looked at Harry hunched over his own desk who merely shook his head so slightly that Elsa wasn't even sure she had seen it. Swallowing hard, Elsa lowered her gaze and continued to write, forcing the ice down each time it flared in response to her pain.

It appears I am not the only monster residing at Hogwarts this year.

It felt like an eternity when Umbridge finally called them to the front of the room, but when Elsa glanced up at the clock she was shocked to find that they had only been there for little over an hour. The girl was now panting and drenched in sweat with the effort of keeping the ice and snow at bay.

"It seems that the message has properly sunk in Potter, you may go," Umbridge said serenely as she released the hand she had been examining. Elsa was galled when she saw that the sleeve of Harry's robe was covered in blood and the words I must not tell lies lay open and bleeding, no longer able to heal. He wrenched his hand away violently as though she had burned him and turned on his heel, stalking away without saying a word.

The older witch then made to seize Elsa's hand but the blonde jerked her arm away before she could.

"Hurts," she lied.

Umbridge simply smirked up at her. "Yes, I imagine it does. Show me."

Elsa held out her clenched fist so that the woman could study the inflamed mark. She made sure leave herself enough space so that she would have time to pull away if Umbridge made to touch her again. Her stomach dropped when the professor shook her head.

"Hmmm, it seems as though we haven't made enough of an impression," the evil witch said nonchalantly. "You will have to come back again tomorrow." She gave a dismissive wave of her hand.

All remaining colour drained from Elsa's face. "You mean I have to do this again, take my gloves off again?" she whispered as terror swept through her like wildfire. I won't be able to do it again. I only barely hung on this time!

The room turned ice cold, extinguishing all the candles, as snow began to slowly drift down from the ceiling. The girl went stiff and was ready to break into a full-fledged panic attack when Umbridge scowled.

"When I get my hands on those bloody Weasley twins I will have them thrown in detention for the rest of the year!" she screeched standing abruptly, causing Elsa to jump back in alarm. She whipped her head in Elsa's direction. "You are dismissed Ms. Arendelle. I will see you tomorrow promptly at 5 o'clock," she said before storming out of the room clearly hell bent on catching the Weasley boys in their presumed act.

Recovering from the shock of her narrow escape Elsa ran over to her desk and yanked on her gloves as fast as humanly possible. Now that her hands where safely encased in the soft fabric she felt her thrashing magic come to a grinding halt and warmth returned to the room. The blonde could have fainted in relief, and on shaky legs made her way back to the Slytherin common room.

xxx

Umbridge is the best, isn't she -_-

I'm doing my best to keep this story alive even though I am swamped with my research. It holds a special place in my heart and buzzes around in my head all the time so I am determined to get it out ^_^

Thanks for reading and as always; review, review, review!

[ekakinomi-forgrownups]

Questioning Neverland--My Thoughts On the Michael Jackson Controversy And Idol Worship In General

※

Warning!

The following post deals with a disturbing, but important social issue that I feel people should know about. If you’re not in the mood to read that, however, use that symbol as a reminder to back away from this post and read another one.

10 days ago, HBO released a documentary called “Leaving Neverland”, which out-lines the lives of two men, Wade Robson and James Safechuck, who explain they were sexually abused by pop mega-star Michael Jackson as young boys for years, in disturbing detail.

The documentary explains how Mr. Jackson used a friendly facade to “befriend” the then-super-fans Robson and Safechuck at different times, and used his super-star glamour to charm and enchant their mothers into letting their little boys stay with this man (who, in both cases, only knew him for a few hours) at his Neverland Ranch, a sort of indoor amusement park for kids…which served a much more devious purpose than just a fun getaway with their favorite pop idol.

Because Mr. Jackson’s favorite attraction at that “park” was, in fact, his bed–where he took the boys almost immediately after meeting them…so that he could start touching them inappropriately, on a regular basis, for years and years–as if these innocent children were just his play-things. And many witnesses report that there were a lot more where that came from–no girls, no men, no women–just little boys. He even went as far as to buy an engagement ring for James Safechuck! (*shudders!*) And to ensure that nobody knew about this “dirty little secret”, he lied to the boys’ parents, brain-washed the boys into thinking that this was how people “show love” to one another, and anybody who would dare tell on him would either get paid huge sums of money to be quiet or be threatened with anything from jail-time to death.

This documentary practically shook the world when it came out–America in particular. It seems everybody’s taking sides now– one side who absolutely won’t defend him after what he did to innocent children, and another side, mostly loyal followers and family members (the Jackson Estate tried to stop HBO from releasing this documentary at first) who say that these men are compulsive liars and/or just out for his money, and that Jackson was just an innocent, child-like weirdo.

And then you’ll find people like me, who don’t know the real truth, and are confused and completely conflicted as to whether it’s better to burn or hug their posters and record collections. Now, I’m not saying I’m a fan of his work myself–but I have experienced this dilemma many times over the course of my life. In a different way than most, however.

You see, it’s odd, but when an autistic person loves something (and that can be anything from a pop star to, say, a pretty color scheme on a fictional character), they feel this sense of true love for that particular thing, and like it could never do us wrong in any way. So when anything even remotely bad does happen (and that can be anything from the character changing designs and getting an ugly new color scheme to the pop star turning out to be an abusive scum-bag), it’s complete emotional turmoil, and we feel like the thing we love had just been ruined for us forever. And this happens for two reasons–1. Autistics tend to think of things only one way or the other, and it’s weird for us to think of something in a neutral way. And 2., we’re way too emotional. Neurotypical (“normal”) people tend to think that we’re not able to feel any complex emotions or empathy. The truth of it is, we actually feel too many–far more than we can express sometimes.

There was a point where I felt like everything I love has been “ruined” for me at some point. To name just a few examples: “The Amazing World Of Gumball” had its aesthetic changed to something I don’t like after its first season. “Pastel Yumi”, a magical girl anime I really liked when I watched the first episode, turned out to have loads of fan-service (meaning characters acting sexy to please the audience) of the 10-year old protagonist. The “My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic” toys only became better-built and actually accurate to the show after I stopped liking the show (I stopped watching it after Season 3). And speaking of My Little Pony, even though I think Nightmare Moon had the prettiest color scheme of any character on the show, I’d feel bad for liking her more than Princess Luna, because call me a goody-two-shoes, but I usually don’t root for evil characters. And, the same goes for the Once-Ler from “The Lorax”.

Since then I’ve changed a lot, and I’ve started finding ways to cope with most of these things and “un-ruin” them…but that’s because they’re all small things, mostly media of different types. I feel very differently on the matter of real people–which brings me back to empathy. While I’m all for #MeToo, it also devastated me. Not because a lot of my favorite creators and directors were being put out of jobs–but because they turned out to be horrible human beings that only think of women as helpless toys that they can stalk, grab and kiss whenever they want. I’ve never been in any of these situations (*knocks on wood*), but just hearing the fact that beautiful, innocent people are getting treated this badly just boils my blood and, at the same time, makes me want to cry for years.

Yet that still doesn’t stop me from watching the kids’ sit-coms created by Dan Schneider or the Disney/Pixar movies directed by John Lasseter, and it doesn’t stop me from wanting to check out The Loud House, which was created by Chris Savino.  All the men mentioned here were very talented, but all sexual predators themselves. Which brings me back to Michael Jackson.

He was a house-hold name when I was a kid, and my first knowledge of him came from both “The Simpsons” episode “Stark Raving Dad”, which featured his uncredited voice, and the Jackson 5 song “ABC”. But I got my first real exposure to his artistry and music during my Dad’s 50th birth-day party last October, where we all sat around, ate cake and watched music videos, and we played several of his hits in a row. I fell in love with the song “Remember The Time”. I also binge-watched that corny “Jackson 5ive” cartoon from the 70’s (which featured a huge portion of their early catalogue) the following November. So to be exposed to such amazing talent and good looks only to be compelled to forget about it all a few months later because he was a horrible person certainly boggled my mind a little. (Bad or confused reactions to sudden changes in plans are another casualty of autism which can be difficult to handle at times).

Suddenly, I begun to seriously ponder my own morals. If I’m a so-called “social justice warrior”, then how can I possibly still enjoy work made by awful people? If I care about minorities so much, then why do I still get joy out of art made by people who obviously don’t care about them? If I can’t bring myself to sympathize with people with such horrible attitudes, then why is it so hard to just ignore them completely? It’s going against my character, and it’s going against my own common sense. Yet if I push these things out of my life, my life will turn up-side-down. What’s a poor puzzled panuki like me to do?

Well, if there’s one up-side to this whole Michael Jackson thing, it’s that it gave the entire world a huge lesson in the dangers of idol worship. So naturally, everybody else is writing about the same types of issues I’m having with this, and how they choose to resolve them. I looked at some of the things they wrote for answers. After looking at the opinions of several different people, I finally found the one article that rang with me the most, and it was written by Constance Grady of Vox. It’s called “What do we do when the art we love was created by a monster?”. You can read it here, but to put it more shortly, this woman basically looked to 3 different literary professors for advice and reference, and they all explained different ways of separating art from artist through different types of methods, created by classical literature theorists. Ms. Grady presented each one in her article, and how it works, to show that there are many different ways of handling a situation like this. To quote Ms. Grady: “All these tools are there, just waiting for me, just as they are waiting for you. And the moment we start to question how we should think about any work of art, we can pick them up and wield them accordingly.”

Another helpful piece of advice came, believe it or not, from Pete Davidson of “Saturday Night Live”, who gave a surprisingly insightful lecture on the “Weekend Update” segment of the show that basically said, that it’s OK if it feels right to let some artists go. But if there’s another artist whose work resonates with you on a personal level so much that they’ve become a part of your heart, you shouldn’t put them out of your life completely. But you should acknowledge that these people did bad things each time you enjoy their work. Basically, that just because someone is talented doesn’t mean that they’re just as good on the inside, and you should acknowledge that. One of the things he said was very smart: “Any time any of us listen to a song or watch a movie made by an accused serial predator, you have to donate a dollar to a charity that helps sexual assault survivors.” After reading all these articles, I found my final, set-in-stone stance on the matter, that bridges the gap between my morals and my enjoyment of a piece of art. Here’s what I think:

If you really don’t like what an artist did in real life, then directly rooting that to their art will only give the real person power over your brain, your fun, your happiness. My mommy told me that no matter what the original artist intended, a piece of art stands alone, and is open to interpretation by anybody who looks at it. Anybody. It’s what she told me to help me understand the appeal of abstract art. And on top of helping me separate art from artist, it also helps me read (some) fan-fiction without cringing, watch modern adaptations of classic books without being to critical, and on top of it all, it also mirrors the Barthes and Livingstone theory mentioned in Constance Grady’s Vox article.

Besides, acknowledging or enjoying their work doesn’t necessarily mean I support the people behind it (as far as their companies are concerned, at least). To these famous people, money is one of the most important things in the world–a lot of times, more important than other people. So unless you have some money to throw out, you’re completely anonymous as far as they’re concerned, because you’re not rewarding them for their work, even if you enjoy it.

The only time I’ll completely make an exception with any artist is if the work they make is too similar to their real life. For example, the Cartoon Network show “Clarence” is about a boy…named Clarence…who has a positive attitude, but things and does things in very weird ways. An eerie mirroring of Skyler Page, the creator, who was fired from Cartoon Network for grabbing the breasts of a crew member for “Adventure Time”, and was later revealed to be a complete mental case…by one of his best friends, who turned out to be the inspiration for one of Clarence’s own friends! (*shudders again!*)

The same thing is very real for R. Kelly, an R&B singer who I never took interest in or even listened to, but who is said to have a catalogue full of highly sexual songs, a lot of which regard age differences and mutual consent. (*shudders one last time.*)

As for Michael Jackson…I don’t really associate his songs or performances with his real self because, if you really think about it, it’s pretty obvious that his pop persona was way different from that. a lot of his popular hits never mention hanging out with little boys. He mentions girls, a lot of which actually prey on him…he also never mentions any of his child-like interests that he had in real life…in fact, I think the only connection the artist Michael has with the real Michael are a few songs that are based on the good side of him (his humanitarian values) and those that are based on his awful childhood, where he himself was abused (not sexually, but still abused) as a boy…which could actually be one of his reasons behind his own abuse crimes. Almost as if he had this secret mentality, like “if I couldn’t have a childhood, then no boy will.” Or maybe he became overly obsessed with male children because he felt like he was getting back a piece of his life that was stolen from him, but expressed his love and sentimentality for it in the most disgusting way possible. I’m not excusing it at all, I think it was still horrible and completely uncalled for. These are just a few theories I had.

Yes, these are all just my personal opinions. And of course, you shouldn’t take that, or any of my personal opinions, as the gospel truth just because you’re reading my blog–everybody has their own individual opinions. And if you haven’t really formed your own, I suggest getting opinions from everyone and everything around you–your friends, your parents, other news sources, other blogs–and see what other people have to say on the matter, and let what you find help you form your own. It’s just like building a puzzle–it takes more than one piece of information to get the full picture.

As for my big picture, the real Michael Jackson doesn’t exist, as far as I’m concerned, and doesn’t deserve to. Just his character that he plays on the stage. And just like the rest of the male characters I’m attracted to, he’s someone I’d never want to be around in real life–just pretty, talented, and charismatic. And in a world where always thinking about the little things can drive you completely insane, sometimes that’s all that really matters.

[darthmama]

All I wanna do is stab some idiots...

Ok real life bitch fest time!

So in September my husband and I somewhat unofficially adopted a friend of ours, Jess.  Technically she’s an adult (mid or late 20′s I think? I forget) but we’ve known her since she was a kid in high school and she became part of this pack of girls that everyone started calling Hubby’s Girl’s.  I can only think that it’s because he assumed the big brother role while they were in the male dominated gaming area and had no problems putting assholes in their place if required. 

Anyways, this one in particular has had issues even since then.  Her family was jacked up to hell and back, she herself has some mental issues (severe anxiety and depression at least though we think she might have a little bi-polar as well?) and has been on meds forever for them.  Back in August she was trying to get out of an ugly abusive situation.  She didn’t have any family willing to help but she did have friends (besides us) that were willing to take her in.  So Hubby and I pitched in funds since no one had much to spare to get her out of the situation and into a better one...so we thought.

Turned out her friends were just as bad!  It got to the point where we were not sure who was being truthful and who was lying through their teeth.  I am well known to be a bull shit detector...not sure why but I am.  So I actually ended up wading into this high school drama to figure out the situation.  In the end I, who has no college degree in psychology or anything else, opted to get Jess out because I felt that if she was left there she would end up out on the streets, taking hard drugs, selling herself, or worse committing suicide.  I kid you not the breaking point was her apparently getting loud on her phone because she was leaning towards self harm and one of the girls with a child came down and told her to shut up.  According to Jess it was rudely, according to the other girl it was politely but frankly my opinion was I didn’t care if the child was sleeping, you don’t tell that to someone who tells you they are having serious thoughts of harm!  Gah I could go on about the shit pulled here!

So Hubby and I scrambled together the money and paid a contractor out to finish a room in our basement while she slept on the couch for about a week.  Hurray!  

Oh but the tale does not end here folks.

2 weeks after we finally get her settled and she starts to turn herself to getting a job and such, her mom ends up in the hospital dying from cancer.  It’s ugly too because her sister is an abusive fuck and didn’t want Jay to even know about things!

So I am driving her back and forth along with another friend to help her get as much time as she can with her mom and playing interceptor to keep the evil hag of a sister away.  It’s rough since I have my own two kids and at the time I was trying to plan a huge Halloween party, but was worth it to know she got some time to make peace with her mother about things before she died.

Wow rough as hell right?  But wait!  There’s more!

Now Jess is a sweetheart and a smart woman but she has a low opinion of herself and needless to say she has done some unsavory things to eat.  We found out she was doing cam work, as in stripping online for money and such.  We knew this before she moved in mind you.  No we didn’t like it but that is her choice to pay the bills and we make sure she has a lock on her door so our two kiddos don’t bust in on her or anything.  She also does her best to keep it to nights when the kids are sleeping.  Set up works well.

Now we still did not have a set contract about her living with us yet.  This was mainly because she had not really gotten a chance to settle.  If she isn’t working steadily then she doesn’t get money and she hasn’t exactly been in a good place to even try this work with her mom dying.  We don’t push, make sure she’s ok and has everything anyway, and let her know that we’ll get to the whole her paying rent or the like eventually.  Hubby and I aren’t exactly straining to make ends meet here after all and she’s not costing us any extra money really aside from buying her cigarettes which she has successfully been cutting back on drastically.  Amazing what happens with supportive people around you that don’t cause trauma...and when it’s balls cold outside so you don’t want to go freeze for that bit of nicotine. :P

Anyways, we had been pretty free sharing everything with Jess, until we discovered a problem with the alcohol.  Now Hubby and I are not big drinkers but we do have a habit of having expensive alcohol.  We told Jess she was welcome to the booze as well when she first moved in.

The problem came when she tried to get herself back to work in front of the camera.  She started purposely getting drunk so she could perform.  I noticed this and reported to Hubby, we were both alarmed that she managed to go through 6 bottles of wine in the span of a week.  Frankly I was glad she didn’t hit the hard stuff because that would have probably been far worse!

We sit her down and have a talk, explaining that we are not looking down on her work or trying to tell her how to live her life but we can’t have her drinking all of our alcohol.  For one she’ll never be able to pay for it and for two there’s kids here and one of the things we told her when she moved in was that if she did anything that would in any way threaten our children her ass would be back out the door.  We’d help her find  shelter or something but she would not be welcome in the house.

Thankfully we got on this early so she hadn’t done anything but we did express to her that we were concerned.  When she told us what she was doing and stated how she needed the money to pay us.  Hubby and I did a synchronized face palm and told her that no job was worth this.  We would rather she lived off us rent free than subject herself to getting drunk and selling herself on the internet.  We weren’t about being paid back, and we still aren’t.  We are about helping her find her feet in the world and building her own life.

I can’t tell you how much she cried hearing that she didn’t have to do this to live and that we understood.

So the last few months have been her slowly building up.  We bought her glasses that she needed so she could work on taking the driving test.  Hubby is pretty sure he can find a cheap car we can get for her.  She’s been trying to find a job but there’s an ugly stumbling block in her way.  Jess has always had issues with her period, making it so that she’s pretty much out of it for a week.  No one is willing to give her a job when she’s going to be regularly out for a week, or possibly two depending on what her period feels like doing.  She did however know that being on the pill helped her manage her period to the point she could function so I start helping her find where she can get the pill in the area for cheap.  Gotta be something out here I figure since we have a college not to far from us right?

So today I take her into town to the CHD (County Health Department) which is the only place to really do this without a 45 minute to 1 hour drive into the city for a proper Planned Parenthood.  She gets in, tells them what she needs, fills out paperwork, and waits.  

It was a fracking hour wait!  That’s bad enough since I’m having to watch the clock for when I need to jet home to get my boys off the bus (which is about a 20 minute drive away mind you).  Then we get to the actual doctor.

First off the doctor tried to do the exam on Jess first.  Jess asked to know if she was going to get the pill first, not wanting to waste money (which isn’t a concern but we appreciate her effort) or time.  The doctor tells her that no she is not getting the pill and Jess asks why.  The doctor cites that Jess smokes and she counters that she will sign up immediately for whatever stop smoking thing the doctor wants but she needs the pill to handle her period so she can get a job.  Doctor then says that Jess has migraines.  Jess admits that she does but points out that plenty of people do and while she has had migraines she also has not had as many in the last number of months (which makes me think it’s linked to stress/anxiety) and that her last 5 doctors all have put her on the pill in spite of these “risks” that this Hag Doc is now lecturing Jess on.  

Now this, I am proud of.  Jess quickly realizes the Hag is not listening to her and this “doctor” is now trying to convince Jess to get an IUD or the shot.  Methods which are more expensive and actually have higher chances of making her period worse.  Jess instead tells the doctor thanks but no thanks and walks out of the office.  The doctor actually tries to claim Jess owes money and Jess shoots back that the doctor did nothing but give her a 15 minute lecture for the hour of time Jess wasted in the waiting room.  She is paying nothing.

You go Jess!

While she is mildly worried about someone trying to sue her since they have her information Hubby has plainly stated that he will slap them with a lawsuit back if need be.  This is even better since Hubby works for the County Government.  He manages the taxes they collect so odds are high that if he shows up angry someone is about to have a bad day.

Meanwhile Jess and I are back to square one hunting for options.  I cannot state how livid I am with this Hag of a doctor.  Doctors that don’t listen to their patients are an epidemic in this damn town and anyone with have a brain takes the drive to the city unless it’s a serious emergency.

I really should have remembered that before wasting my time.  The question is, what the hell now?

Help me tumblr land!?

[paulckrueger]

How to freelance: 5 steps to profit

Learning how to freelance is the first step toward an unlimited earning potential.

It’s a wonder why more people don’t do it — especially when there are so many good reasons to:

Flexibility. Choose when and where you want to work, and who you want to work with.

Scalability. Earn as much or as little as you want. Eventually, you can even leave your 9-to-5 to freelance full time.

Creativity. Flex your creative muscles by diving into a freelance hustle that uses your passions. That means you can make money and *gasp* have fun while doing it.

Getting started isn’t as difficult as you’d think either. All it takes is the right systems.

How to freelance in 5 steps

Luckily, I have that system. It’s the same one that I’ve used to start I Will Teach You to Be Rich and it’s the same one that I’ve used to help hundreds of thousands of people to earn as much as six figures in their freelancing career.

And now, I want to show it to you too.

Step 1: Find a profitable idea

It’s amazing how many people get tripped up at this stage. In fact, it’s the most common reason I hear for why people don’t start their own side business.

“I don’t know how to find a good freelancing idea.”

When I hear this, I just want to grab the person by the shoulders and shake them while screaming, “But you already have a lot of good ideas!!!”

In fact, you can find your perfect freelancing idea by answering four simple questions about yourself:

What do you already pay for?

We already pay people to do a lot of different things. Can you turn one of those things into your own online business?

Examples: Clean your home, walk your pet, cook you meals, etc.

What skills do you have?

Now, what do you know — and know well? These are the skills you have that you’re great at — and people want to pay you to teach them.

Examples: Fluency in a foreign language, programming knowledge, cooking skills, etc.

What do your friends say you’re great at?

I love this question. Not only can it be a nice little ego boost — but it can also be incredibly revealing.

Examples: Workout routines, relationship advice, great fashion sense, etc.

What do you do on a Saturday morning?

What do you do on a Saturday morning before everyone else is awake? This can be incredibly revealing to what you’re passionate about and what you like to spend your time on.

Examples: Browsing fashion websites, working on your car, reading fitness subreddits, etc.

Find an answer to those questions and you’ll find a business idea.

Step 2: Find your first client

Finding clients can be a mystery of fantastic proportions for beginner freelancers. After all, where do these generous, money-giving gatekeepers of work live? How can we find them?

Luckily, there are a variety of different places you can look if you’re a beginner. Here are three great places that I’ve used and my students have used to find great clients.

Craigslist (yes, that Craigslist)

Networking events

Where your clients live

Contrary to popular belief, Craigslist isn’t just for sketchy encounters and weird sales listings. It can also be a great place to find quality clients.

Why? When a business posts a job listing for freelancers on Craigslist, they’re not getting top quality responses. In fact, the people who respond to them are typically so bad that you just need to be a little bit better than them to stand out.

This doesn’t just apply to Craigslist either. You can do this with any job board.

Here are a few suggestions of great sites freelancers can use to find business:

Writers: MediaBistro.com, Upwork.com, FreelanceWritingGigs.com 

Illustrators/Designers: 99designs.com, Designs.net

Programmers: Toptal.com, Gun.io

The second place you should look: Networking events.

I know, I know. Some of us would rather spend our time listening to a lecture about the importance of brushing your teeth than be at a networking event.

However, a good networking event will be flush with opportunities to find connectors. Notice I said connectors and not clients. A connector is someone who can introduce you to potential clients.

That’s right. You’re not going to actually be looking for leads at these events.

Here’s a good script you can use to connect with a connector:

“Hey, if you know of anyone who’s looking for a video editor, let me know. Here’s my card. You can pass it along to them.”

Of course, you should mold the script to fit your individual situation.

If you live in a big city, networking events are a dime a dozen. If you don’t, that’s okay. There might be a few in your area happening occasionally.

Be sure to check out event boards like the following for great opportunities for networking events.

Meetup.com

Eventbrite.com 

Facebook

The last place I suggest beginners look: Where potential clients live. 

No this isn’t your potential clients’ physical houses, you weirdo. I’m referring to the places online and in real life where your potential clients might frequent.

Instead, you’re going to go online to the places where potential clients might frequent. It’s what Luisa Zhou, entrepreneur and writer for GrowthLab, did to help her earn $1.1M in 11 months.

From Luisa:

I started spending all my free time hanging out where my potential clients were online (free Facebook groups) and directly engaging with them by sharing valuable content and answering any questions I could about advertising.

That’s how I got my first client. A woman I’d been helping for free — answering her questions about how to set up a basic advertising campaign — asked me how she could work with me, and when I told her the price — $5,000 for six months — she said, without missing a beat, “I’m in.”

You can use the exact same framework for your potential clients.

Are you a graphic designer? Find a Facebook or subreddit group for small business owners who need your services.

Are you a writer for a niche industry? Start answering questions on Quora regarding your niche.

Maybe you’re a video editor. Find online groups for bloggers looking to expand their content media.

No matter what you choose, you need to make sure you stay engaging and provide high-quality answers to your potential client. By doing this, you build your brand and make connections you would never have otherwise.

Once you have a client lead, it’s time to use a script to vet them.

Step 3: Pitch your talents

Now we get to the fun stuff: Pitching. You’re now going to craft an email pitch that’ll sell your services to a qualified lead.

Yes, marketing and selling your skills can be intimidating — but it’s much simpler as long as you remember to sell benefits.

Remember the old marketing saying, “Buyers don’t want a new bed. Buyers want a good night’s sleep.”

Some great examples of this:

Here are the five things you need to sell the benefits of your services in an email:

The introduction. You’re going to want to build rapport by introducing yourself and how you know about the client.

The offer. Talk about them. What do you want to do for them? Why are you good for that role? You’re going to want to do some research on the organization to see what they need help with.

The benefit. Walk them through how your work will benefit their company. Are you going to free up more time for them? Are you going to maximize profits by X amount?

The foot-in-the-door. This is a classic technique that utilizes an old psychology trick to get the client to agree to a small agreement so you can ask for a larger agreement later.

The call to action. Be clear with this and ask them if they would like to proceed. The call to action is a critical part of this script.

When it’s all put together, it’ll look something like this:

CLIENT’S NAME,

[Introduction] I read your article about X and noticed that you’ve recently started using videos on your website.

[The offer] I’ve been doing video editing for three years and I’d like to offer to help you edit your videos and get them optimized for the web.

[The benefit] That would make them look more professional and load faster, which is important for your readers. And you’d free up time that you could use to create new content.

[The foot-in-the-door] We can discuss the details, of course, but first I wanted to see if this is something you might be interested in.

[The call to action] If so, would it be okay if I sent you a few ideas on how to help?

Best,

Ramit Sethi

Step 4: Charge a good rate

There are no hard and set rules when it comes to charging a rate, which makes it a perfect breeding ground for anxiety and nervousness for freelancers.

My suggestion: Don’t worry too much about this part — at least at first. It’s more important that you get started at all than making sure your rates are perfectly tuned.

With that said, there are three methods I suggest for finding a good starting rate:

Drop Three Zeros Method

Take your ideal salary, divide it by two, and then drop three zeros from it. Boom. You have an hourly rate.

For example, say you’d really like to earn at least $80,000. Just take out the three zeros from the end, divide by two, and you now have your rate: $40/hour.

Double your “resentment number”

I love this one because it’s both really interesting and effective. Ask yourself: What’s the lowest rate you’ll work for that’ll leave you resentful of your work?

Say you’ll work for $15/hour at the VERY LEAST. Just double that number so now you’ll earn $30/hour.

Do what the next guy does

This method is incredibly simple: Go to Google and search for the average hourly rate for whatever service you’re providing. You’ll get a good sense of where to start when you’re charging your clients.

Once you start earning, it becomes much easier to take on more or less work to get to an earning amount you’re comfortable with.

Step 5: Invest in yourself

Remember: You’re going to make mistakes when starting out and that’s okay! I’d rather have my students screwing up pricing or pitching than never getting started at all.

That’s why I want to offer you something to help you get started even more: My FREE 15-page guide to finding your first client: Hustle Your Way to the Top.

In this guide, you’ll learn:

How to get inside your potential clients’ heads

How to overcome the automatic “no” and score big wins by deeply understanding your prospects

How to use psychology to identify the most likely customers and get them to say yes

I’ll also show you the one huge mistake freelancers make so you can avoid it and separate yourself from the rest.

Just enter your info below and get the bonus lesson today.

How to freelance: 5 steps to profit is a post from: I Will Teach You To Be Rich.

from Surety Bond Brokers? Business https://www.iwillteachyoutoberich.com/blog/how-to-freelance/

[samuelfields]

How to freelance: 5 steps to profit

Learning how to freelance is the first step toward an unlimited earning potential.

It’s a wonder why more people don’t do it — especially when there are so many good reasons to:

Flexibility. Choose when and where you want to work, and who you want to work with.

Scalability. Earn as much or as little as you want. Eventually, you can even leave your 9-to-5 to freelance full time.

Creativity. Flex your creative muscles by diving into a freelance hustle that uses your passions. That means you can make money and *gasp* have fun while doing it.

Getting started isn’t as difficult as you’d think either. All it takes is the right systems.

How to freelance in 5 steps

Luckily, I have that system. It’s the same one that I’ve used to start I Will Teach You to Be Rich and it’s the same one that I’ve used to help hundreds of thousands of people to earn as much as six figures in their freelancing career.

And now, I want to show it to you too.

Step 1: Find a profitable idea

It’s amazing how many people get tripped up at this stage. In fact, it’s the most common reason I hear for why people don’t start their own side business.

“I don’t know how to find a good freelancing idea.”

When I hear this, I just want to grab the person by the shoulders and shake them while screaming, “But you already have a lot of good ideas!!!”

In fact, you can find your perfect freelancing idea by answering four simple questions about yourself:

What do you already pay for?

We already pay people to do a lot of different things. Can you turn one of those things into your own online business?

Examples: Clean your home, walk your pet, cook you meals, etc.

What skills do you have?

Now, what do you know — and know well? These are the skills you have that you’re great at — and people want to pay you to teach them.

Examples: Fluency in a foreign language, programming knowledge, cooking skills, etc.

What do your friends say you’re great at?

I love this question. Not only can it be a nice little ego boost — but it can also be incredibly revealing.

Examples: Workout routines, relationship advice, great fashion sense, etc.

What do you do on a Saturday morning?

What do you do on a Saturday morning before everyone else is awake? This can be incredibly revealing to what you’re passionate about and what you like to spend your time on.

Examples: Browsing fashion websites, working on your car, reading fitness subreddits, etc.

Find an answer to those questions and you’ll find a business idea.

Step 2: Find your first client

Finding clients can be a mystery of fantastic proportions for beginner freelancers. After all, where do these generous, money-giving gatekeepers of work live? How can we find them?

Luckily, there are a variety of different places you can look if you’re a beginner. Here are three great places that I’ve used and my students have used to find great clients.

Craigslist (yes, that Craigslist)

Networking events

Where your clients live

Contrary to popular belief, Craigslist isn’t just for sketchy encounters and weird sales listings. It can also be a great place to find quality clients.

Why? When a business posts a job listing for freelancers on Craigslist, they’re not getting top quality responses. In fact, the people who respond to them are typically so bad that you just need to be a little bit better than them to stand out.

This doesn’t just apply to Craigslist either. You can do this with any job board.

Here are a few suggestions of great sites freelancers can use to find business:

Writers: MediaBistro.com, Upwork.com, FreelanceWritingGigs.com 

Illustrators/Designers: 99designs.com, Designs.net

Programmers: Toptal.com, Gun.io

The second place you should look: Networking events.

I know, I know. Some of us would rather spend our time listening to a lecture about the importance of brushing your teeth than be at a networking event.

However, a good networking event will be flush with opportunities to find connectors. Notice I said connectors and not clients. A connector is someone who can introduce you to potential clients.

That’s right. You’re not going to actually be looking for leads at these events.

Here’s a good script you can use to connect with a connector:

“Hey, if you know of anyone who’s looking for a video editor, let me know. Here’s my card. You can pass it along to them.”

Of course, you should mold the script to fit your individual situation.

If you live in a big city, networking events are a dime a dozen. If you don’t, that’s okay. There might be a few in your area happening occasionally.

Be sure to check out event boards like the following for great opportunities for networking events.

Meetup.com

Eventbrite.com 

Facebook

The last place I suggest beginners look: Where potential clients live. 

No this isn’t your potential clients’ physical houses, you weirdo. I’m referring to the places online and in real life where your potential clients might frequent.

Instead, you’re going to go online to the places where potential clients might frequent. It’s what Luisa Zhou, entrepreneur and writer for GrowthLab, did to help her earn $1.1M in 11 months.

From Luisa:

I started spending all my free time hanging out where my potential clients were online (free Facebook groups) and directly engaging with them by sharing valuable content and answering any questions I could about advertising.

That’s how I got my first client. A woman I’d been helping for free — answering her questions about how to set up a basic advertising campaign — asked me how she could work with me, and when I told her the price — $5,000 for six months — she said, without missing a beat, “I’m in.”

You can use the exact same framework for your potential clients.

Are you a graphic designer? Find a Facebook or subreddit group for small business owners who need your services.

Are you a writer for a niche industry? Start answering questions on Quora regarding your niche.

Maybe you’re a video editor. Find online groups for bloggers looking to expand their content media.

No matter what you choose, you need to make sure you stay engaging and provide high-quality answers to your potential client. By doing this, you build your brand and make connections you would never have otherwise.

Once you have a client lead, it’s time to use a script to vet them.

Step 3: Pitch your talents

Now we get to the fun stuff: Pitching. You’re now going to craft an email pitch that’ll sell your services to a qualified lead.

Yes, marketing and selling your skills can be intimidating — but it’s much simpler as long as you remember to sell benefits.

Remember the old marketing saying, “Buyers don’t want a new bed. Buyers want a good night’s sleep.”

Some great examples of this:

Here are the five things you need to sell the benefits of your services in an email:

The introduction. You’re going to want to build rapport by introducing yourself and how you know about the client.

The offer. Talk about them. What do you want to do for them? Why are you good for that role? You’re going to want to do some research on the organization to see what they need help with.

The benefit. Walk them through how your work will benefit their company. Are you going to free up more time for them? Are you going to maximize profits by X amount?

The foot-in-the-door. This is a classic technique that utilizes an old psychology trick to get the client to agree to a small agreement so you can ask for a larger agreement later.

The call to action. Be clear with this and ask them if they would like to proceed. The call to action is a critical part of this script.

When it’s all put together, it’ll look something like this:

CLIENT’S NAME,

[Introduction] I read your article about X and noticed that you’ve recently started using videos on your website.

[The offer] I’ve been doing video editing for three years and I’d like to offer to help you edit your videos and get them optimized for the web.

[The benefit] That would make them look more professional and load faster, which is important for your readers. And you’d free up time that you could use to create new content.

[The foot-in-the-door] We can discuss the details, of course, but first I wanted to see if this is something you might be interested in.

[The call to action] If so, would it be okay if I sent you a few ideas on how to help?

Best,

Ramit Sethi

Step 4: Charge a good rate

There are no hard and set rules when it comes to charging a rate, which makes it a perfect breeding ground for anxiety and nervousness for freelancers.

My suggestion: Don’t worry too much about this part — at least at first. It’s more important that you get started at all than making sure your rates are perfectly tuned.

With that said, there are three methods I suggest for finding a good starting rate:

Drop Three Zeros Method

Take your ideal salary, divide it by two, and then drop three zeros from it. Boom. You have an hourly rate.

For example, say you’d really like to earn at least $80,000. Just take out the three zeros from the end, divide by two, and you now have your rate: $40/hour.

Double your “resentment number”

I love this one because it’s both really interesting and effective. Ask yourself: What’s the lowest rate you’ll work for that’ll leave you resentful of your work?

Say you’ll work for $15/hour at the VERY LEAST. Just double that number so now you’ll earn $30/hour.

Do what the next guy does

This method is incredibly simple: Go to Google and search for the average hourly rate for whatever service you’re providing. You’ll get a good sense of where to start when you’re charging your clients.

Once you start earning, it becomes much easier to take on more or less work to get to an earning amount you’re comfortable with.

Step 5: Invest in yourself

Remember: You’re going to make mistakes when starting out and that’s okay! I’d rather have my students screwing up pricing or pitching than never getting started at all.

That’s why I want to offer you something to help you get started even more: My FREE 15-page guide to finding your first client: Hustle Your Way to the Top.

In this guide, you’ll learn:

How to get inside your potential clients’ heads

How to overcome the automatic “no” and score big wins by deeply understanding your prospects

How to use psychology to identify the most likely customers and get them to say yes

I’ll also show you the one huge mistake freelancers make so you can avoid it and separate yourself from the rest.

Just enter your info below and get the bonus lesson today.

How to freelance: 5 steps to profit is a post from: I Will Teach You To Be Rich.

from Finance https://www.iwillteachyoutoberich.com/blog/how-to-freelance/ via http://www.rssmix.com/

[thegloober]

How to freelance: 5 steps to profit

Learning how to freelance is the first step toward an unlimited earning potential.

It’s a wonder why more people don’t do it — especially when there are so many good reasons to:

Flexibility. Choose when and where you want to work, and who you want to work with.

Scalability. Earn as much or as little as you want. Eventually, you can even leave your 9-to-5 to freelance full time.

Creativity. Flex your creative muscles by diving into a freelance hustle that uses your passions. That means you can make money and *gasp* have fun while doing it.

Getting started isn’t as difficult as you’d think either. All it takes is the right systems.

How to freelance in 5 steps

Luckily, I have that system. It’s the same one that I’ve used to start I Will Teach You to Be Rich and it’s the same one that I’ve used to help hundreds of thousands of people to earn as much as six figures in their freelancing career.

And now, I want to show it to you too.

Step 1: Find a profitable idea

It’s amazing how many people get tripped up at this stage. In fact, it’s the most common reason I hear for why people don’t start their own side business.

“I don’t know how to find a good freelancing idea.”

When I hear this, I just want to grab the person by the shoulders and shake them while screaming, “But you already have a lot of good ideas!!!”

In fact, you can find your perfect freelancing idea by answering four simple questions about yourself:

What do you already pay for?

We already pay people to do a lot of different things. Can you turn one of those things into your own online business?

Examples: Clean your home, walk your pet, cook you meals, etc.

What skills do you have?

Now, what do you know — and know well? These are the skills you have that you’re great at — and people want to pay you to teach them.

Examples: Fluency in a foreign language, programming knowledge, cooking skills, etc.

What do your friends say you’re great at?

I love this question. Not only can it be a nice little ego boost — but it can also be incredibly revealing.

Examples: Workout routines, relationship advice, great fashion sense, etc.

What do you do on a Saturday morning?

What do you do on a Saturday morning before everyone else is awake? This can be incredibly revealing to what you’re passionate about and what you like to spend your time on.

Examples: Browsing fashion websites, working on your car, reading fitness subreddits, etc.

Find an answer to those questions and you’ll find a business idea.

Step 2: Find your first client

Finding clients can be a mystery of fantastic proportions for beginner freelancers. After all, where do these generous, money-giving gatekeepers of work live? How can we find them?

Luckily, there are a variety of different places you can look if you’re a beginner. Here are three great places that I’ve used and my students have used to find great clients.

Craigslist (yes, that Craigslist)

Networking events

Where your clients live

Contrary to popular belief, Craigslist isn’t just for sketchy encounters and weird sales listings. It can also be a great place to find quality clients.

Why? When a business posts a job listing for freelancers on Craigslist, they’re not getting top quality responses. In fact, the people who respond to them are typically so bad that you just need to be a little bit better than them to stand out.

This doesn’t just apply to Craigslist either. You can do this with any job board.

Here are a few suggestions of great sites freelancers can use to find business:

The second place you should look: Networking events.

I know, I know. Some of us would rather spend our time listening to a lecture about the importance of brushing your teeth than be at a networking event.

However, a good networking event will be flush with opportunities to find connectors. Notice I said connectors and not clients. A connector is someone who can introduce you to potential clients.

That’s right. You’re not going to actually be looking for leads at these events.

Here’s a good script you can use to connect with a connector:

“Hey, if you know of anyone who’s looking for a video editor, let me know. Here’s my card. You can pass it along to them.”

Of course, you should mold the script to fit your individual situation.

If you live in a big city, networking events are a dime a dozen. If you don’t, that’s okay. There might be a few in your area happening occasionally.

Be sure to check out event boards like the following for great opportunities for networking events.

The last place I suggest beginners look: Where potential clients live. 

No this isn’t your potential clients’ physical houses, you weirdo. I’m referring to the places online and in real life where your potential clients might frequent.

Instead, you’re going to go online to the places where potential clients might frequent. It’s what Luisa Zhou, entrepreneur and writer for GrowthLab, did to help her earn $1.1M in 11 months.

From Luisa:

I started spending all my free time hanging out where my potential clients were online (free Facebook groups) and directly engaging with them by sharing valuable content and answering any questions I could about advertising.

That’s how I got my first client. A woman I’d been helping for free — answering her questions about how to set up a basic advertising campaign — asked me how she could work with me, and when I told her the price — $5,000 for six months — she said, without missing a beat, “I’m in.”

You can use the exact same framework for your potential clients.

Are you a graphic designer? Find a Facebook or subreddit group for small business owners who need your services.

Are you a writer for a niche industry? Start answering questions on Quora regarding your niche.

Maybe you’re a video editor. Find online groups for bloggers looking to expand their content media.

No matter what you choose, you need to make sure you stay engaging and provide high-quality answers to your potential client. By doing this, you build your brand and make connections you would never have otherwise.

Once you have a client lead, it’s time to use a script to vet them.

Step 3: Pitch your talents

Now we get to the fun stuff: Pitching. You’re now going to craft an email pitch that’ll sell your services to a qualified lead.

Yes, marketing and selling your skills can be intimidating — but it’s much simpler as long as you remember to sell benefits.

Remember the old marketing saying, “Buyers don’t want a new bed. Buyers want a good night’s sleep.”

Some great examples of this:

Here are the five things you need to sell the benefits of your services in an email:

The introduction. You’re going to want to build rapport by introducing yourself and how you know about the client.

The offer. Talk about them. What do you want to do for them? Why are you good for that role? You’re going to want to do some research on the organization to see what they need help with.

The benefit. Walk them through how your work will benefit their company. Are you going to free up more time for them? Are you going to maximize profits by X amount?

The foot-in-the-door. This is a classic technique that utilizes an old psychology trick to get the client to agree to a small agreement so you can ask for a larger agreement later.

The call to action. Be clear with this and ask them if they would like to proceed. The call to action is a critical part of this script.

When it’s all put together, it’ll look something like this:

CLIENT’S NAME,

[Introduction] I read your article about X and noticed that you’ve recently started using videos on your website.

[The offer] I’ve been doing video editing for three years and I’d like to offer to help you edit your videos and get them optimized for the web.

[The benefit] That would make them look more professional and load faster, which is important for your readers. And you’d free up time that you could use to create new content.

[The foot-in-the-door] We can discuss the details, of course, but first I wanted to see if this is something you might be interested in.

[The call to action] If so, would it be okay if I sent you a few ideas on how to help?

Best,

Ramit Sethi

Step 4: Charge a good rate

There are no hard and set rules when it comes to charging a rate, which makes it a perfect breeding ground for anxiety and nervousness for freelancers.

My suggestion: Don’t worry too much about this part — at least at first. It’s more important that you get started at all than making sure your rates are perfectly tuned.

With that said, there are three methods I suggest for finding a good starting rate:

Drop Three Zeros Method

Take your ideal salary, divide it by two, and then drop three zeros from it. Boom. You have an hourly rate.

For example, say you’d really like to earn at least $80,000. Just take out the three zeros from the end, divide by two, and you now have your rate: $40/hour.

Double your “resentment number”

I love this one because it’s both really interesting and effective. Ask yourself: What’s the lowest rate you’ll work for that’ll leave you resentful of your work?

Say you’ll work for $15/hour at the VERY LEAST. Just double that number so now you’ll earn $30/hour.

Do what the next guy does

This method is incredibly simple: Go to Google and search for the average hourly rate for whatever service you’re providing. You’ll get a good sense of where to start when you’re charging your clients.

Once you start earning, it becomes much easier to take on more or less work to get to an earning amount you’re comfortable with.

Step 5: Invest in yourself

Remember: You’re going to make mistakes when starting out and that’s okay! I’d rather have my students screwing up pricing or pitching than never getting started at all.

That’s why I want to offer you something to help you get started even more: My FREE 15-page guide to finding your first client: Hustle Your Way to the Top.

In this guide, you’ll learn:

How to get inside your potential clients’ heads

How to overcome the automatic “no” and score big wins by deeply understanding your prospects

How to use psychology to identify the most likely customers and get them to say yes

I’ll also show you the one huge mistake freelancers make so you can avoid it and separate yourself from the rest.

Just enter your info below and get the bonus lesson today.

Give me the free bonus lesson: Hustle Your Way to the Top

Source: https://bloghyped.com/how-to-freelance-5-steps-to-profit/

[lillerblg-blog]

I upload my reflection on ‘how have I got here?’

drawing 

I hated drawing. Okay, that’s not 100% true. I still remember, when I was younger around 5, I always did drawing about tale characters, some fantasy drawing and my mom said they’re beautiful and like everyone else I did believe it too. So when I went to primary school I loved art lessons and once I participated in an art competition and when I shown my final painting to my teacher I asked her ‘is it nice?’ my teacher said ‘no’ (here I was so sad for a second) and she continued ‘this is not nice, this is beautiful Lili’. I don’t know why I still remember this conversation this clear, but probably because this was my first sense of achievement in art.

however, later, in high school I didn’t really cared about art or drawing, I didn’t think about choosing a career of arts. but when me and my family moved to London (I was 15) I went to a normal high school and I chose art&design as a subject and I truly loved it, it helped me to fell in love with art again. I’m so grateful for those years as I decided I wanna work with art somehow. 

I went back to Hungary after finishing with GCSEs, and I was attending to an art high school, I was studying art history, graphics and academic drawing by models. I liked that I surrounded by Hungarian students so I finally understood everything and I could make some friends, but on the other hand I didn't really like the school method. I had one-day long academic drawing practice lectures on every week and we drew ‘still life’ and portraits or full-length drawings about live models. They tried to teach me what I missed in the past 2 years (I dropped in the middle of the course) but it was just impossible me. They expected me and us to draw exactly what we see in front of us, it had be correct by scale, size, shadows, shades, everything like pros did in last century. It was really cool if you were good in drawing, but if you weren’t then you could feel isolated and  ‘excommunicate’. Plus, all of the BA courses based on academic drawing skills (don't know why, so stupid, I don't think so that there is connection between graphic design and drawing skills, but never mind) so if you wanna get into a uni then you need to pass the 3-steps application process where the second step is a practice exam drawing full-length by live model (1. portfolio and 3. interview). I felt so hopelessness and futureless as I hated drawing and also wasn’t good in it at all.

I didn’t went to uni in Hungary in the end, I rather came to London within that to UAL to study graphic design and I still happy for this decision.

as I explained, it seems I always loved drawing in the depth of my soul just those years in Hungary, they really pushed me to believe I’m terrible in drawing and I shouldn't do it. however, I wanted to change on this old habit that I don't draw, so I bought a small journal sketchbook and now I'm making sketches about what I see on my way home, these are normally made on buses or trains. I know its not a big deal, but for me it is, I'm really proud of myself to get rid of the thought that I'm not good in drawing.

3D

I’ve done something which I could say similar to 3D in Part 1 on a Catch Up Day. it was a 10 minutes challenge to connect two elements together without sticking, so I made this geometric straw pyramid. I really enjoyed the method and also was satisfied with the outcome. 

I would do more 3D works in the future if it will be available and have time to spend on it.

photography

in high school I had photography lessons and also did my GCSE in it. that was the first time in my life holding an expensive real camera in my hand, I remember I couldn't even use it. of course, later on I got used to how to use them and also I truly enjoyed the projects and all of the things what we have done at photography lessons.

at the beginning of foundation course I set up a photoshoot for my blind date project, and I think it went well. it was a bit weird that I had to do the photoshoot about a ‘stranger’ I mean it was a little uncomfortable to tell instructions to her, but I feel this feeling in me doesn't come up on the outcomes.

I enjoyed to do and set up the photoshoot, and because of this feeling in me I became interested in photography, moreover in photo manipulations, what possibilities do we have, both manual and computer-based.

to be honest I'm pretty bad in technical things however also very interested in, so I would be very happy to be able to attend on a photoshop class or something, because I realised it doesn't matter how interested I feel, I can't learn it by myself just by watching videos.

film

filming is not really my world but I was always impressed by effects and creative solutions. so I'm interested in how each films was made by, but I wouldn't do as a job, I rather just watching them.

animation

I kinda have the same feeling to animation like to film. I always so amazed by truly creative animations and more amazed by how they did it, how they were created. 

print

I very like prints especially lino prints. I like the most about linos that they are multipliable as many times as I want it and by this I had the opportunity to print them in different colour see which one is matches the most. I also like the cutting process due to I like detailed works, I like to work carefully and be able to take my time.

the ‘biggest’ lino cut I made is an eight-sheets book and it took me 2 or 3 months to finish as it is a coloured lino, more precisely I used 5 colours.

typography

when we were doing the typography project at the beginning -to be honest- I didn't really like it as it seemed a bit dry, boring. however, later on as we worked on the project it began to be interesting and I started to enjoy it. at the end, it was one of my favourite projects. I learned that typography is really the base of every piece of graphic design, without a good edited typography even the greatest work can be looked awful.

this is my final outcome at this project, and I honestly enjoyed it despite the fact that at the beginning I thought it will be boring and ‘dry’.

book arts

I like making books and also liked the book project, especially the first two one-day projects, both the group and individual one. I liked the group project because it was great to cooperate with classmates and set up a book together where all of the decisions were made together too. however, I enjoyed the individual project as well as I explored how different things can we create using an old book, in my opinion it was really beneficial and useful for further book projects too.

research

of course, I like to do researches especially hand-on researches like experimenting, watching movies & interviews or visiting related exhibitions. I think these ways of getting information is more useful and lasting on longer term as I remember more easily what I experience, see or watch.

I can't even imagine a project without research, I search for related images or articles inevitably anyway.

group work

I truly enjoy group works & critics every time we have it. at the beginning, I didn’t want to take part in group things because I felt shy and uncomfortable due to my weak English but after couple of times I realised it’s doesn’t matter, the point is to describe my thoughts as clearly as I can and don’t worry about the rest. moreover, in my opinion I found group critics very beneficial, it helped me a lot particularly when I got stuck in the middle of the project or just wasn’t sure about my ideas.

one-day project

I found beneficial these short projects as well as longer ones, this is because in my opinion these shorter projects help us to get a taste and get the feeling & mood to an upcoming projects. I could learn a lot from these teaser days. if it would be possible, I would do at least one one-day project at the start of every project.

this is my ‘how have I got here’ reflection, I hope you will be able to understand my thoughts and opinion despite of my grammar.

[liampayhnes-blog]

Appointment: Cryptographer Silvio Micali in Bitcoin, Ethereum and Proof Stake

Silvio Micali is undoubtedly an MIT lecturer and Turing Award-winning cryptographer known for his or her work inside technologies that will form the particular bedrock connected with blockchains nowadays: public-key cryptosystems, digital autographs, pseudorandomness in addition to multiparty calculations. He is furthermore the co-inventor of the zero-knowledge proof.

Inside ’90s, he or she worked on Raffiné agreement, a new protocol getting nodes inside a distributed method to concur with a state adjust. And in this, he plus long-time collaborator Shafi Goldwasser were co-recipients of the A new. M. Turing Award, in essence, the “Nobel Prize throughout computing. ”

Upon understading about Bitcoin four years ago, Micali turned the attention by mechanism design and style, which acquired consumed the dog for the preceding seven several years, and luogo headlong in creating a proof-of-stake algorithm. His / her project is termed Algorand.

For example, Algorand uses novel way of Byzantine deal with solely nine estimated steps. Inside each step, committee in charge of a particular competition, golf course, rules of golf committee, etc. members, preferred at random in the private lotto, are exchanged. The result is your high-security technique with a minimal risk of forks.

According to Micali, recent checks show Algorand can method 2 MB blocks with 17 just a few seconds, compared to Bitcoin, which creates a 1 MB block just about every 10 minutes. (A paper about these benefits will be displayed at SOSP, the biennial ACM Assemblée on Os's Principles, in the future this month. )

In an appointment with Bitcoin Magazine, Micali explained the reason he perceives proof of pole is more advanced than proof of do the job, the opinion algorithm in which underlies nearly all cryptocurrencies right now, including Bitcoin and Ethereum. Although Ethereum, more often known as a smart commitment platform, is going to transition to help proof of position next year.

Pointless Evil Micali thinks proof work must have been a great idea with first seemed, but now we have seen splits, he message or calls it a great “unnecessary evil” for several explanations.

“The new I seen the Bitcoin, I could see all the complications. To me, the leading difficulty is a waste with computational information. That is actually appalling, ” he mentioned. “It drs up selling prices and depletes the planet regarding resources. ”

Second, they sees miners as “a new heart of power” and a orthogonal drive to the authentic users with the system: typically the coin stands.

“If all 5 mining costly can handle what goes around or would not go in any block, regarding sense is definitely the ledger decentralized? You would not want miners having command over the journal, particularly when they get low margins, are miles away and dependable to not a soul. I think it can be a recipe regarding disaster, ” he explained.

Finally, business deal ambiguity is not going to sit very well with him or her. In Bitcoin, occasionally a couple blocks tend to be found at close to the same time, building a temporary hand in the company. When that is working in the background or an algorithm, the side with the more significant hash electric power is pointed, while the different and its pads “disappear. ” If your purchases happened to be within the orphaned mass, it will eventually find picked up all over again in the main archipelago, but for Micali, the idea will be unsettling.

“Every time I realize my purchase is in some sort of block, My partner and i worry often the block could disappear. Yet never mind restless people including me; finance institutions may not be able to take on the risk, ” he claimed. “Can you actually imagine a monetary world everywhere wire geneva chamonix transfers could be considered back? ”

Natural Democracy Micali is convinced proof of share is a far better option. Throughout proof of spot, there are not any miners, a perfect coin spots. Further, a new coin holder’s ability to develop or verify a prohibit is based on just how many coins inside system the person owns.

“This is a healthy interpretation involving democracy, ” Micali reported. “Your have an effect on in retaining the condition of the strategy is based on the amount of you are genuinely invested in the training course. ”

Nevertheless there is a hook: creating a proof-of-stake algorithm is tough to do. Even though several plans claim to have proved useful up with your secure project, Micali feels some of those says are suspicious. “The simply to, people can certainly claim whatever they want, ” he mentioned.

One of the biggest obstacles in evidence stake will be the “nothing on stake” challenge. If the string forks, the suitable strategy for almost any coin support is to prolong both places to eat to make additional obstruct rewards or even double commit. That goes resistant to the central layout goal of the blockchains: receiving users that will converge using one chain.

Many projects are looking for ways to build their proof-of-stake protocols by building perks or perhaps punishments for getting coin owners to comply with the rules. Together with that, several proof-of-stake programs require end users to put right up a type of security and safety deposit or maybe bond.

Micali feels any well-designed proof-of-stake cryptocurrency really should stand alone, however , not having extra methods. He considers bonding parts doors that slow actors.

“Let me consult you, what exactly fraction on your disposable salary can you put together the dining room table and not effect? �� he / she said and also suggested this honest folks will created only a touch, ceding management to bad actresses with significant pockets.

“The danger is always that only undesirable people will deliver up deal with over a lots of money to govern the system. If they gain much more funds by acting up, they will be content to lose these people put on the exact table, ” he explained.

He likewise disagrees armed with the idea of using penalty to get clients to are in line.

“A weak status rules by threats along with fear, ” he claimed, comparing the particular practice to be able to barbaric punishments used by a number of nations for you to fight criminal. Why do these cards do it? Mainly because criminals are really rarely ensnared, he reported. “So as soon as they catch just one, they disembowel the poor gentleman. ”

He / she continued, “Do you want to hors somebody who all misbehaves? Certainly. But a nicely organized method is one in you don’t ought to punish men and women. ”

Bitcoin and Ethereum Most people perspective Bitcoin just as a cryptocurrency, but Micali thinks the foremost value of Bitcoin and Ethereum are seeing that enablers connected with smart plans, in which consumers can designate if-then ailments around installments.

“At the bottom of the day, accomplishing only transfers is easy, ” he mentioned, adding that they did not need to trivialize the challenge. “Of training, decentralized obligations are better than central payments, what really elevates a cryptocurrency from another form of dollars is that you may actually do a sensible contract. ”

Based on of which, he perceives that the two Bitcoin in addition to Ethereum will benefit from using the best comprehensive agreement algorithm readily available. Currently, both equally systems usually are “huffing plus puffing, ” he explained. Bitcoin is usually constrained to help 7 deals per secondly, while Ethereum can course of action only 18 per following, compared to Visa’s 2, 000 per next.

“If typically the blockchain skin scales, isn’t the item better intended for Bitcoin and also Ethereum? If your blockchain possesses a [mathematical] proof security, certainly is not it a great deal better for its people? ” your dog said. “If the blockchain cannot be hijacked by miners who are liable to no-one and stay in some far-away jurisdiction, isnt that a additionally for all end users? ” Micali thinks consequently.