#HOTDOG HARPY

[undertale-encyclopedia]

[undertale-npcs]

UNDERTALE MINOR NPC TOURNAMENT

75+ of your favorite and often looked-over characters!

- Characters without merchandise

- Characters that arent battled

- Characters that barely have any dialogue

- Characters you cant even see!!

From Box Lover to Drunk Bun, Hotdog Harpy to Ficus Licker, Ragel to Charles, only the REAL best Undertale characters for this bracket!!

(Starting soon) (Follow or whatever ig)

[sulemio-week-official]

Tumblr President Sulemio is back🍅✨🍅✨🍅✨

We're doing a 100 themes of sulemio challenge! Tag the account and/or use the tag #sulemio100 so we can reblog your work! Check the link for more info🍅

You can make any content (edits, amvs, fanfiction, art, cosplay etc). 🍅

If your work is nsfw please tag it appropriately for us to retweet.

There is no time limit to this event, we will keep retweeting as long as you use #sulemio100 and or tag the account🫧

If you're posting on ao3 you can add it to the collection archiveofourown.org/collections/100_themes_of_sulemio_challenge

You can interpret these prompts however you want!✨

This event will happen parallel on twitter so be sure to check it out🌈

You do not need to do all the prompts.👍🏼

Have fun!

The link will have FAQs🎈

If you have any questions give us an ask or a message✨

Prompts:

1- Prologue 2- Angel 3- Gaming 4- Syzygy 5- Ocean 6- Gurgle 7- Childhood 8- Supplication 9- Picnic 10- Desert 11- Cereal 12- Hot Chocolate 13- Trespassing 14- Princess 15- Harpy 16- Summer 17- Forest 18- Crepes 19- Birthday 20- Interpreter 21- Cooking 22- Boat 23- Ikea 24- Lifetime 25- Yuri 26- Vibraphone 27- Date 28- Mountain 29- Popcorn 30- Goldfish 31- Collar 32- Hound 33- Cuddles 34- Hiccups 35- Thunderstorms 36- Mercenary 37- Enamel 38- Donuts 39- Psychopomp 40- Debauchery 41- Gunpla 42- Shapeshifter 43- Fatherhood 44- Kaiju 45- Couch 46- Sex 47- Prohibition 48- Lies 49- Hobby 50- Wallpaper 51- Video Game 52- Sky 53- Skiing 54- Hotdog 55- Rome 56- Alcohol 57- Gamer 58- Stockings 59- Kiss 60- Christmas 61- Tattoo 62- Ruins 63- Flowers 64- Nature 65- Codependence 66- Kamasutra 67- Azure 68- Poof 69- Snowball 70- Magic 71- Break 72- Nostalgia 73- Doomed 74- Cozy 75- Heaven 76- Family 77- Virtual 78- Desperation 79- Mental 80- Misanthropic 81- Musical 82- Trainspotting 83- Gardening 84- Stupid 85- Oblivious 86- Thief 87- Jealousy 88- Forearms 89- Eri 90- Forever 91- Yearning 92- Surfing 93- Neck 94- Pining 95- Headpats 96- Cassowary 97- Forgiveness 98- Metanarrative 99- Overstimulation 100- Epilogue

[ratsoh-writes]

Skeleton is activating their ecto for whatever reason, but suddenly, their hands have hotdog fingers like the movie everything everywhere all at once (see image below)

Who is screaming/crying/throwing up/fainting/turning it on and off again/committing science (laboratory)/ committing science (😏)/ committing science (mischief)/ getting attacked by the hotdog seagull?

They stare unblinkingly at the hot dog hands. No thoughts, no comprehension, are they even seeing this?: oak basil salt pesto snipe peaches moose fisher quill barin compass thistle tempo

They screech and start waving their hands around other peoples faces like that’ll help: papyrus sugar sparks gold rhythm Jasper finn papaya Ollivander arwin Artemis gears yarrow vibrato

They’re screaming, cussing, might have even shed a quick tear. This sucks and they hate the world: red edge mal willow rust noir pepper Flambe boss lord Pearl Hilda Jupiter pudding cricket

They curse loudly and try to pick something up immediately. First reaction is of course to experiment: sans star lilac lush butch rancher cider captain Helios atlas orion shield lens

They stare at the hot dog fingers, eerily calm. Too calm. They might be plotting a murder: sir butler green slim wine coffee mutt harpy mango taffy

They’re absolutely fascinated, utterly transfixed. These hot dog fingers captivate them. They must try to grab things immediately: charm pop G bruiser ace pitch maple silex roost Alden Pluto stitches

They’re convinced they’ve been drugged. Pure denial at what’s going on right now: honey cash weasel barley ram sails hook crow saga zen tinker

[spookygibberish]

I read "Hotdog Monster" as Hodag for a moment and was disappointed when I realized I made a mistake. Btw love your harpy designs.

Ahaha, If he's any Fearsome Critter, then he's more than likely (half) Snoligoster. It's actually not super far off from what (his kind of) Siren is in this setting anyways, sans horn and propeller.

(Also thank you ^^)

[tobyfoxbutreal]

EVERYONE FAVORITE NUMBER AND COLOR!

Toriel: Well, my child, I’d have to say… well, 80 is nice… and so is purple!

sans undertale: ehh, 1’s nice and short. y’know, like me. and, uhhh… vermillion. ‘s what my bro wears.

THE GREAT PAPYRUS: NYEH HEH! YOU WISH TO KNOW MY FAVORITES? WELL, MY FAVORITES ARE 20 AND VERMILLION! IT’S THE COLOR OF MY SCARF AND BOOTS!

yup. color 20.

NO, THEY’RE VERMILLION!!!!

Undyne: You wanna know MINE?? Well, I like 50. Y’know, right midway. And I, uh.. like yellow. If ya know what I mean. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Alphys: U-Undyne!! Ehehehe.

A-anywho, I like 50, and am torn between blue and red =^-^=

[my best approximation of] Mettaton: My favorites, darling? Well, if you insist.

255’s an oldie but a goodie, at least according to most computers. And, well…

If you don’t know I like pink, have you even seen my brand, darling?

Asgore: My favorite number and color, eh? Hmm…

Well, 80’s nice, and… vermillion’s calming, like a warm fire in Snowdin.

G: 666 AND BLACK. NOW GO.

12th Month: Heh! ‘Course Goopster’s mad.

HEY.

Anywho, I like 3 and green.

Specifically the green of light tricklin’ through green leaves.

Flowey: YOU of all people? Heh. Well, after being a flower for so long, you begin to not like anything.

But, if ya wanted Azzy’s…

Flowey, mimicking Asriel: Do’h boy! I sure do just love yellow and infinity!

Flowey: Happy?

Frisk: I am naught but a vessel for the player’s actions. I doth not have any opinions other than the ones of those who control me’s.

The First Fallen Human: …

…Brown and 6. Now leave me alone.

That One Talking Rock From The Ruins (AKA Speedrunner’s Bane): Well, I’m partial to purple. ‘S the color of where I spent a lotta my life. Ya don’t just forget that.

And, well… I suppose 20’s nice.

Snowman From Snowdin Forest: White’s really nice. Y’know, color of snow. And, uhh…

3’s nice too.

Jerry: Leave me the hell alone, freak. *crowd boos*

Shopkeeper Bunny (QC): Well, darlin’, if ya ask me, orange’s the best ‘round here. So’s 22, ‘cause it’s the amount my homemade Cinna Bunnies heal!

Politics Bear: Well, I quite like blue. Reminds me both of Snowdin’s ice and Waterfall’s walls.

And hey. 16’s pretty good. I’d say “thaaaaat’s politics”, but it wouldn’t make sense to.

Gerson: Wahaha! You goin’ around askin’ everyone, huh?

Well, a dark blue or indigo’s always nice. 18’s pretty good, too.

T3mMie: hOI hOOmaN! Yoo wANt tO kN0 teM’s FavRIt cOluR N nUBmEr?

TEm Lik BLU adn YELLO, yAyA! BLU andn YELLO coLuR oF TEm Sh0p! T3m aLSo liKE Th0rtY 3!

You better not tell anyone though, capiche?

bOI!

Mushroom:

Mushroom dance, Mushroom dance,

Whatever could it mean?

It means light blue and 66.

Hotdog Harpy *rock guitar plays*: Red and 30!

Red’s the color of hotdogs, and 30’s the headstack limit!

H… Hots Fireguy?: THE NAME’S HEATS FLAMESMAN!

Heats Flamesman: Anywho, yellow and 40. Remember that, ok?

Catty: OMG! I absolutely ADORE purple and 300.

Bratty: OMG, like, I like the same number! I prefer green though.

Kris: …

Susie: Well, if you insist I guess?

Blonde and 14.

Ralsei: I like green, and… well, I don’t have a favorite number, so I suppose it’s whatever you like, haha!

Noelle: W-well, uhm, I like 3, and uh…

…Purple…?

Berdly: Well, I like 10 and blue!

Jockington: Well, since you asked, bro.

My faves are 99 and turquoise!

*rock guitar plays Jockington out*

Catti: …

…6.6 repeating.

And black.

Eg: …

Egg(s): …

King: Leave me to myself. I have no reason to speak with you lightners. *crowd boos*

Queen: I Like 11111111 (In Binary Lol) And The Color Blue

Or Whatever The Cyber City’s Color Is Lmao

Lancer: Well, my delicious little worm, I enjoy both 100 AND navy blue!

How’re you gonna counter that, my sweet apple?

JEVIL, JEVIL!!: UEE HEE HEE! CHAOS, CHAOS! THOSE ARE MY FAVORITES!

[Spangtong]: I [Enjoyable] THE NUMBER [π] AND COLOR [Gray]

Heats Flamesman: Well? Did you remember?

❤️Yes No

HOW COULD I BE SO EASILY DEFEATED??????????

[bluefeathrs]

The harpy was slowly but surely getting a decent idea that Gotham was… pretty awful for a city. Dangerous was putting it lightly, you were as likely to get mugged as you were to get exposed to some nasty hallucinogenic superchemical. …Maybe if some hunter did venture here, they'd be too preoccupied with everything else to notice any of her comings and goings.

Senja peered at the phone, feeling her brow furrow at the sight of a cop getting covered in mustard and ketchup (and feeling her nose wrinkle at the thought of the smell). 

“I think Rachel mentioned the name Condiment King, but I thought she was talking about a brand. Not…” she gestured vaguely at the phone. “That. So this is a semi-regular thing? Him holding up distribution centers? …with that kind of aim, he could probably make easier money running a trick hotdog stand or something.”

Oh sweet summer child, if only you knew! Gotham was basically the onion analogy in perpetual motion, each stinking layer revealing a more rotten, flaked one underneath... Who even knows how awful the very core of it really was. But River thinks Senja's done a pretty good job at keeping a constant tread at the surface, though.

River shifts a glance-up at her frazzled friend, blinking innocently.

"Oh, Condiment King!" Comes the cheerful repeat, as if the moniker was something normal to hear. Fingers expand the video full-screen and the phone is turned just in time to treat Senja's peepers to the sight of a cop getting doused with a double-shot jettison of mustard and ketchup.

"I do love it whenever he decides to run-amok, it's like getting ice cream for dinner... He's basically harmless, but ship-out's definitely not going to be on-time today! I'm surprised you don't know him, he usually shows-up at the kind of place you work at."

[shippy-pjo-shipper]

Percianca ~ Time

"And last but not least. Dessert !"

Honestly, I wasn't even surprised. At least not anymore. The world had changed, people had changed, customs had changed, heck, even language had changed ! So what was so crazy about eating blue cookies ? I didn't know. Probably nothing at all. At least that's what Percy's nonchalance let me understand.

So blue food it was. Delicious blue food, mind you. One crucial thing I had learnt during this long week was that Sally Jackson was a divine cook. Actually that she was divine at everything she did. Cooking was just another of her many ways to show how she was the kindest woman there ever was.

The kindest woman... This idea resonated in her in a way that seemed to suggest that there were memories there, once upon a time. She wasn't sure, she could probably never be again, but everytime she looked at Sally Jackson, it was like the image of another woman was mixing itself with hers. Not only her, every face felt as unknown as familiar. As friendly as frightening. Though this must be because of the whole "monsters are all around and constantly tracking you down thanks to your smell" thing that popped up in her life a few weeks ago.

That's the reason why this week had been so crazy. That and Percy, of course. The boy couldn't slow down to save his own life. How had all of this begin, again ? I wasn't quite sure, my memory still let me down from time to time since me and Nico joined Camp Half-Blood. But I was pretty sure I was responsible. One second we were talking about New-York and how little I could recognize of it, and the next Percy was dragging me around Time Square, introducing me to the wonder that were hotdogs.

"I'll show you around my city !" He had said. Of course I refused at first. What about Nico ? What if he gets lost ? What if there are monsters attacking us ? What if Camp is under attack while we're gone ? What if Travis and Connor play a prank on us and go through our things while we're gone ? What if we come back too late and get eaten by the harpies ? What if Mr. D. forgets about us while we're away and doesn't let us in again ?

I didn't voice out all of those concerns. Maybe none, actually. I think I just...turned red, and mute. Why did I do that again ? Oh ! Yes.

"But it's miles from here. And I'm pretty sure you can't go through New-York in a day. Except if that changed too."

"What about more than a day, then ? It's winter break, you can crash at home and I'll be your guide for the week."

Yeah, that was it.

"You can crash at home" She shouldn't have reacted like that. It didn't make sense to react like that. She had been sharing a cabin with dozens of kids, dozens of boys, for the past two months. Surely "crashing" at Percy's was nothing compared to it.

How wrong was she, but not how she could have ever expected.

She slept in the couch, each morning being awaken by the delicious smell of breakfast, so delicious that she knew what she'd wish to have every morning at camp from now.

The daytime was far from this comforting atmosphere but nonetheless memorable.

Parks, amusement parks, restaurants, cinema (with color, mind you), museums, libraries... (Yes the last two were from Annabeth's recommendation list, the discovery was even for Percy and I).

It was as nothing I had done before. As no fun I had ever experienced.

A half-blood's life is dangerous, stressful, hurtful, short. So it was nice to enjoy the most of it for a few days.

Percy filled me in on everything that had flew me by while I was in the Lotus Hotel. All this time I had lost caught on in a week ? Certainly not. But all my sorrow and stress washed away in the same amount of days ? Yes, definitely.

I came back in the present by the sound of a snap or two.

"Earth to Bianca. Is that the sight of blue that freezes you like that ?"

I smiled almost goofily. "Just the surprise."

"Wait till you've had a bite !" He smiled, letting me see the crumbs already at the corners of his lips.

So I did as he said, and with just a bite, I knew I had another reason to come back here and do that again soon. If I needed any.

@them-awesome-rarepairs

[modern-mecha]

A comprehensive list of cr oc ideas bc im deranged part 2

ᴬˡˢᵒ ʳᵉᵇˡᵒᵍ ʷᶦᵗʰ ᵘʳ ᵒᶜ ᶦᶠ ʸᵒᵘ ᵘˢᵉ ᵗʰᶦˢ ᵗᵒ ᵐᵃᵏᵉ ᵒⁿᵉ ᶦ ʷᵃⁿⁿᵃ ˢᵉᵉ

89. Jello cookie

90. Venus fly trap cookie

91. Higanbana dragon cookie

92. Moth cookie

93. Honey bee cookie

94. Queen bee cookie

95. Corn cookie

96. Candle/wax cookie

97. Toffee cookie

98. Toxic waist cookie

99. Hotdog cookie

100. Glowstick cookie

101. Banshee cookie

102. Ghost cookie

103. Skeleton cookie

104. Alien cookie

105. Harpy cookie

106. Eel cookie

107. Kenku cookie

108. Changeling cookie

109. Warfordged cookie

110. [Any enemy type in ob/k] cookie

111. Siren cookie

112. Plushie cookie

113. Hobgoblin cookie

114. Doll cookie

115. Bubble cookie

116. [Rhino/Stag] beetle cookie

117. Bagworm cookie

118. Ink cap mushroom cookie

119. Sphinx cookie

TIP: if you wanna make an effective design choose an aesthetic and a dnd class for your character, this will help you flesh out the design and give them more personality

[hypnotica-ships]

3x3

So, thanks to some A+++ enabling from the discord server, I've decided to post my BNHA self insert fanfic. I haven't really talked about my insert, but I plan to sometime in the future, but for now I"ll leave ya'll in the dark.

This whole thing was made just to make me and my friends feel good and give us some much needed self indulgence.

Word Count- 1,550

Hypnotica- My S/I

Grafight- @fictional-characters-are-hot's S/I

Slasher- @alwayslovestruck's S/I

It's been 3 hours.

4 hours since the hero team Discorded was asked to help out with a capturing some drug smugglers.

3 1/2 hours since they found the drug den.

3 hours since Hypnotica sent in Grafight and Slasher to covertly search the place.

3 hours since he's heard a response.

It was a loud, shrill scream that made his blood go cold. Expecting the worst, he decided to find some loiters and use his quirk to get some backup.

After being only able to scour up 2 shadows for his mask alts to posses, he realized the longer he spends time looking for people, the more harm could come to his friends...*family*. Dolly, taking the form of a Harpy, and Dylan taking a shape of a Lion man, will have to do for backup. Hoping that it won't be needed, he finds an open window and heads into the den.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Look! They're opening the crates. That must be how they ship the quirk enhancing drugs."

"Slasher. I can't see shit, it's too dark in here and I don't have dope cat eyes like yo-....wait a sec..."

The younger of the heroes takes out a sketch book and quickly draws our some night vision binoculars and they suddenly 'pop' out into a physical object. After giving a thumbs up, in order to stay quite, Grafight uses the goggles.

"Oh shiiiiiiiiiiiiit....that's a lot of powder. How the hell do they sell it all?"

Slasher just shrugs it off and continues watching the group of men, tail swaying as they do.

All of a sudden, all of the men stop moving. A few moments later they all turn to the gurder that the hero duo were perched on.

"Hey! Lookey here fellas, some new 'test subjects' to try the new mix on."

"Oh as if you'd even come close to touching us! You won't even get a chance to lay a finger on us. Right Grafight?"

"Right! Good luck fuckers!"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Slasher! Grafight! What's going o-...."

"We won!'

Hypnotica was greeted by the sight of Slasher triumphantly standing with one foot on top of a human mound of passed out thugs while Grafight was looking over the crate of drugs, kicking one of the thugs that started move on the ground.

"Wha- Then who the hell screamed?!"

Grafight, grabbing the thug she kicked by his collar and threatening to punch him again.

"This guy did. I think he's like...the kingpin or something. Screams like a little bitch though."

"We managed to take these guys out super easily, like it was nothing! Can't believe they were talkin' smack like they could beat us..."

Still a bit shaken up from his worry, Hypnotica headed over to check out the crate. Noticing a strange metal box buried slightly underneath some of the drugs, he pulls it out and begins to question the kingpin about it.

"This your tracker? Is this the thing that you use to keep an eye on your 'supplies'?"

"You better answer. Grafight is pretty liberal with bodily harm."

Slasher says as she walks over to look at the box better, poking it with one of her claws.

"...it....it...he.....hehaha..."

"Punching time?" Grafight asks looking up at Hypnotica.

"Not yet. He needs to be conscious to answer our questions."

"Talk then, asshat."

"...doesn't matter....we....we were gunna..."

"Gunna what, idiot?!"

"d....die...die anways..."

"...Punch him Grafight."

Hypnotica grumbles while Dolly pried open the box with her talons.

"Gladly!"

"...I don't think he meant, like, *80 times Grafight...*"

Slasher now worriedly watches as the kingpin get's absolutely destroyed by fists.

"..."

Hypnotica seems frozen as he looks down at the box, unmoving, and holding his breath. Cocking her head, Slasher notices that somethings wrong with him.

"Hey....you alright big bro?"

"..."

Finally stopping her onslaught on the kingpin, Grafight looks over to Hypnotica.

"Cat got your tongue or something?"

Still not saying a word, Hypnotica turns the box so the others can see. In the box is a small glowing green tube with wires attached to it, there's also a countdown screen slightly below it. It's only got 3 seconds left on it.

As her tail drops, so does her heart, with only a few second to accept her fate Slasher meekly gasps as she starts to speak.

'Oh..'

'Shit'

Grafight finishes Slasher's thought, right before everything goes white.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Sirens are blaring as the green mist clears from the rubble of what's left of the warehouse. Various bodies are strewn all about, policemen and EMTs were able to arrive on the scene fairly quickly. Not that it mattered, the damage was done. From the looks of everything, there was no survivors, all thugs and kingpin were either crushed by the rubble or suffered from some strange type of asphyxiation. Death seemed to encompass the area, until one of the EMTs discovered a lion like shadowy figure seemingly protecting a group of still breathing bodies. The figure soon dissipated leaving a strange mask in it's place.

The bodies were still alive, but barely, and they needed medical attention and fast.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"-Sources say that the 'hero' team were incapable of apprehending the group and had to resort to extreme measures to stop the-"

"Horseshit! Why would we set off a bomb? We had it covered already, it wouldn't kill them to get their facts straight..."

"Calm down Gummybear, the doc said you shouldn't strain yourself..."

It's been 4 days since Grafight was released from the hospital, suffering from 2 broken arms, rendering her unable to use her quirk...among other things. Fatgum, her partner, had insisted to stay by her side until things healed, neglecting his own hero duties in the process.

"The doc can shove it as far I care! These newscasters have no right to spew out garbage lies like that! It's gunna hurt our rep.... Sure we might not be the nicest, safest, smartest heroes in the game, but we aren't villainous either!"

"...You...you do have a point, but don't worry about it, I"m sure one of the others will give them a piece of their mind and sort things out. Right now you and I have dinner to eat!"

Grumbling as she rose from the couch, Grafight followed her partner to the kitchen, sitting down at the small round dinning table that the family usually shared. This dinner was different though. The table had a nice white satin cloth draped over it, with 2 light candles on top. It seemed that this time these two will be dinning alone.

"Take a seat baby, I'll go grab our meal."

"It better be something good, the meals at the hospital were utter shit..."

She lets her sentence trail on as a covered plate is placed ever so gently in front of her.

"Oh? Did you plan on surprising me? ....Babe, my arms, I can't open it."

"Yeah, my bad, here ya go my sweet Gummy."

Fatgum slowly removes the cover for maximum surprise effect. Once it's off, Grafight can't help but smiley widely as she notices one of her favorite meals, but with a culinary twist. Hotdogs sliced up into star shapes, surrounded by a circle of mashed potatoes, topped with melted cheese, a dash or salt, and a glob of ketchup in the middle of it all.

"So? Ya like?"

"..."

Grafight's eye's start to tear up, but her smile still stays plastered on her face. Fatgum notices right away and goes to quickly grab some tissues.

"Oh Gummy, I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to upset you! I just...I just thought I could do something special for ya...I...I-"

"Oh baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaabe! I love it! Omg, I love it so much, you're the best, you know that right?"

"I...yeah....no. Wait. YOU'RE the best, you're so strong and special to me, I...I"m just so happy that I didn't lose you...you mean the universe to me."

"Stop...I'm already crying, let's just...let's just enjoy this meal together, okay?"

"Okay. I"m starving anyways..."

Fatgum takes his place across from Grafight, and starts to devour his meal.

"Uh....Ahem...."

"Oh! Yeah, my bad, let me help ya."

The two enjoy their meal together, never breaking their love filled eye contact.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Slow down Mochi, you shouldn't be over-exerting yourself."

"But Kano, I want to dance! I really like this song...cough cough...it's a total....total banger, and I deserve to have some.....fun after what happened. Everyone else has been so....gloomy since then....I just....want to bring some life.....back into the house is all...."

"I know, I know...but, you won't be able to do much joy-spreading if you can barely walk to the mailbox without getting winded halfway there."

"Hmph, stupid bomb chemicals getting.....getting into my lungs...fucking up my whole system...did they ever figure out what...what was in that tube...anyways?"

"They still haven't called us back about the results yet, but they said the inhaler they gave you was working well enough for us not to worry. So we won't, right Mochi?"

"...Yeah...I guess...I just hate...feeling weak like this...I wanna cry but.... I don't want the others to...to see....they've been through enough....I don't wan them to worry about me...me too..."

Kano takes a moment to think, after a moment he takes Slasher's paw and leads her into the living room.

"Sweety...what are you doing?"

After he gets Slasher to relax on the couch, he walks over the Hypnotica's advance sound system and grabs a homemade looking CD. Putting it in he looks to Slasher.

"The good doctor said YOU shouldn't exert yourself, but....he never said anything about me."

As soon as the music starts, Kano begins to dance in a way that's all to familiar to Slasher. It's a dance they've grown to call the 'Humpty Dance', and no one else in the house can quite get it right like these two.

"Oh Kano! This....this makes me so....happy! Keep...keep going! Maybe...maybe you could...put in some...Slipknot next? Pwetty Pwease?"

"Anything for you my Mochi."

Slasher enjoys the show Kano puts on for almost 2 hours, by the time he gets done, Kano is just about as winded as Slasher has been recently. The two then cuddle on the couch, just taking in each other's slow and labored breathes.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"You will most certainly not."

Sir Nighteye slams his hand down on the counter to emphasize his point, making Hypntoica jump a little.

"And why the fuck not? The need to get their facts straight. I will not stand for all of this fucking slander."

Sir sighs and pushes his glasses up, trying to calm himself down.

"I understand that, but 'kidnapping the newsroom executive' is not the most ideal way to go about it. You can barely walk, even with the crutches!"

Motioning to Hypnotica's broken left leg, and the sprain in his other. Hypnotica just huffs and looks off to the side, still with an angered expression plastered on his face.

"So. Fucking. What? Okay, maybe kidnapping is a bit extreme, but..."

Sir's own angry expression starts to soften as he notices the tears that begin to fall from his partner's face. Wondering how long he's been holding it in.

"...I can't let my family take the blame for a stupid mistake that I made!"

Hypnotica's body begins to shudder as more tears fall, Sir walks over to him and embraces him in a way to try to calm him down.

"It's not your fault...all of you did what you could to try and handle the situation."

"That doesn't excuse all of the death and destruction that happened, and not to mention all the hurt my family is going through because of it!"

"No. It doesn't. But how is any of that your doing, hmm?"

"...I...I..."

"Shh, just stay, and relax. I'll make up a fully detailed report and send out a few copies to some of the stations. They'll most likely use those facts since my name does carry some weight..."

While still holding him with his right hand, Sir uses his left to tilt Hypnotica's chin up to meet his eyes. After a few seconds go by, he rests his head on his partner's.

"...Trust me dear. Everything will turn out just fine."

"Promise?"

"I promise. I saw it."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"A trusted source, who has decided to stay anonymous, has confirmed that the deaths in the Discorded Warehouse accident were not the before mentioned teams fault, but the fault of-"

"Thank you! Finally, a news channel that checks their facts. Even though I'm fine with a few deaths under my belt, but whatever I guess."

"Oh! Look Gummy! That's me! Saving all of those orphans was quite the task, I'll have to tell you all about it later."

"Kano my love! Let me help you with those dishes, there is far to many for one man to clean."

"Thank you Mochi! I kinda went all out with the meal this time, it was a celebration for everyone recovering so quickly....well, mostly everyone..."

"I call bullshit. Of course right after I get healed I trip down the stairs and end up right back to square one."

"Guess that means I'll have play nurse bit longer my dear."

~~*Cue Laugh Track*~~

[cyberrat]

24th Batch Masterlist!

Here it is! check it out :3c

1. Lúcio/McCree (+ mabbe Jack or Gabriel) – Lúcio is a thirsty boy on the regular but since the new recruit McCree has stepped foot on base he just really really needs that D.

2. Gavin900 – possessive 900 catches Gavin with someone else. He 1) makes him regret that decision and 2) shows him that he only needs one [1] guy who fucks his brains out because 900 does that really thoroughly.

3. Crowley/Aziraphale – naga!Crowley; harpy!Aziraphale; Aziraphale tops! that’s all, that’s the prompt haha :) I’ll figure out something tas-tey :3

4. Hanzo/McCree/Genji/Reinhardt – direct cont of B22F1 – Alphas topping Alphas. McCree has creamed Hanzo so now it’s the others’ turn!

5. R76 (+ whoever I want) – ABO; Gabriel is an absolute slut in heat; makes the Alphas on base show off for his viewing pleasure so he can weed out the weak. Jesse is a hopeless young Alpha but R76 are fond of him so he gets some regardless of his performance.

6. R76 – based on a twitter drawing (will link to it in the fic; got artist permission to write the fic); R76 are married and Jack loves Gabriel’s freckles.

7. SidLink – Link fucks Sidon’s slit and Sidon gets so into it that he comes even though his cocks haven’t popped out. V messy.

8. R76 – Gabriel needs to get rawed long and hard and Soldier gives it to him. Full on whining ugly tears sobbing action.

9. R76 – Jack is always hot for Gabe. Always. Gabe needs to sleep tho. So he allows Jack to fuck around with him as long as he can keep sleeping. Oviposition is somehow involved as well :)

10. Gavin900 – Virgin!Gavin gets hotdogged by Nines and is cute and shy for how hot he gets for that shit.

11. Reaper/McCree – continuation B18F1; Predicament bondage! – McCree has been caught by Overwatch/Deadlock and Gabriel now makes him pay for what he put him through... 

All of ‘em are 1200 words! thank you all so much for your support :) so kind and generous!

[undertale-encyclopedia]

Finally pitting the most popular Undertale characters, as voted by you, against each other:

[undertale-npcs]

Made a nice lil image for the header of this blog :3

Spider Donut guy is freaking out about how affordable the drinks are here.

Fishbowl Echo Flower guy is at the front door ready to tell people about where all the activities are (cards and food).

Hotdog Harpy is like those sign spinner guys, shes advertising the food. Buy it!

Ragel, Diamond Kid, Normal Snail, and the Newspaper Editor are plotting a ttrpg game, the newspaper editor woman is good at writing so she is hosting, and the other three cant really go places on account of being Stuck in the ground, Slow, and A child, so this seemed like a fun activity they could all be a part of.

The monsters at the big table are playing cards, except Fox Head he's just trying to figure out the rules. Rabbit Kid is watching from afar and being judgmental over the moves they make. Punk Hamster is just chilling, who ended up appreciating the new faces at Grillby's.

Dress Lion is too anxious to talk to anybody yet, but theyre happy being able to go out in their dress.

Ficus Licker tried to leave through the fire exit but couldn't (hes not fire) so he's just been pretending to be a door inspector the whole time to avoid embarrassment.

Ice Wolf likes drinks.

Rock Wants A Drink.

Elder Puzzler is blocking the jukebox so that people only play music he approves of (none of it).

Business Dragon, Faun, and Hand Receptionist used to be friends back in high school and are all catching up.

Skateboard Girl is flirting with Fuku Fuku Fire.

Ugly Fish and Red Bird are just drinking and sitting silently together because they havent developed any personalities outside of "Being single" and "Speaking for Grillby". Theyre friends though so thats nice.

Drunk Bun and Red Demon are scoping out all the hot guys.

Fish Receptionist is the bartender today.

Charles and Loren are infodumping about their hyperfixations (work and stars, respectively)

And everyone else is just chilling.

[itsshortfurball20]

Percy Jackson, The Avenger

Summary: Percy has an encounter with Nick Fury. A year later, he’s being called on to help protect the world… again. He’s not alone in this Avengers Initiative. A genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist; a super soldier; a green scientist; a Norse god; and two secret agents. What could go wrong?

1 2 3 4 5

This chapter has 4,205 words

6 – The Shaquille O’Neal of Lying

There were certain things Percy could live without. Quests, over-arrogant and dramatic gods and goddesses, pranks from the Hermes cabin that left him covered in peanut butter and harpy feathers... but the one thing Percy probably hated most was demigod dreams.

As soon as Percy had fallen asleep, he found himself in the last place he wanted to be—Loki’s cell. The green glass prison formed around the son of Poseidon. Across the cell from where Percy stood, Loki was sitting on the small cot. He was staring at the camera that the others had watched him from earlier.

Loki finally shifted his gaze from the camera to Percy. “What a pleasant surprise,” he said in a tone that made Percy know that this wasn’t pleasant nor a surprise. Loki spread his arms wide, gesturing to the small cell around them. “Welcome.”

Percy crossed his arms in front of him. All of a sudden, he was glad that he had fallen asleep in his clothes, instead of standing in front of Loki in his PJs. “What do you want, Loki?”

“I want to offer you a proposal.”

“Uh, sorry, but I already have a girlfriend.”

“A business proposal,” Loki stressed. “I know you want to avoid this upcoming fight. You’re not prepared. You haven’t practiced or so much as swung a sword in three years. You’re hopelessly outmatched for what’s coming. But, if you agree to work with me, then you won’t have anything to worry.”

Percy remained unmoved. “I assume this proposal isn’t free.”

“Listen carefully, for I will only offer this once,” Loki stated. “If you agree to work with me, you will lend me your forces, your armies, then I will make you powerful. You can have mortals kneeling at your feet, and all you have to do is give me command of Olympus’ armies. Together, we could control those pathetic mortals.”

The son of Poseidon remained silent for a couple seconds. His hands drifted down towards his pockets. Percy curled his hand around Riptide, ready to pull his sword out in case things went south. “I think you’re forgetting what I am. Sure, I’m the son of Poseidon, god of the sea and earthquakes, but I’m also the son of Sally Jackson. Half human, half god. You, on the other hand, are a mixture of vegetables and Ares’ sweat—nothing but plain nastiness.”

Loki’s smug smile melted away as he sneered. “You’re a fool. Letting unlimited power go for what? A family that has used you as a pawn before? For a world that would shun you if they knew what you truly were?” Percy’s hands tightened into a fist as Loki kept talking. “Join me, Perseus. Together, we can show those mortals what real power is.”

“I’d rather die protecting my family than live knowing I betrayed them.”

Loki rushed him. Percy pulled out Riptide and held the sharp blade carefully against Loki’s neck. The Norse god froze. Loki carefully eyed the blade, before raising his hands. He gave a small laugh. “Fine. When the Chitauri come, you’ll fail, and you’ll realize that you should’ve accepted my offer while you had the chance. You will die knowing that you had the chance to save yourself but threw it away.”

The edges of Percy’s vision started fading, the green cell disappearing. Just before Percy’s dream took him elsewhere, he whispered, “Go to Tartarus.”

Loki’s face disappeared and suddenly he found himself in a different place.

Space, to be exact.

A gasp escaped Percy’s mouth as he floated around. Living in Manhattan, Percy had never seen many stars. Instead, city lights lit up the night. There had been a couple times when he’d gotten the chance to get out of the city and see the stars, but none of those times could ever compete with what he was seeing now.

Hundreds upon thousands of stars surrounded Percy, larger and brighter than he had ever seen. Percy was struck by the beauty of it all. He couldn’t help but think of Bob, the titan who sacrificed himself to help Annabeth and him escape Tartarus. Bob, whose last request was to say hello to the stars.

A loud roar came from behind him. It took the demigod a couple seconds to turn around—having to move like he was swimming without water—before he could see the cause of the noise. High above him was a large spaceship, something straight out of Star Wars. Flying in and out of the ship were the equivalent of alien whales. Huge, swimming, aliens that vaguely resembled whales. In space. Oh gods.

One of the space whales let a big roar or scream. A sick feeling settled in Percy’s—not like the time he had gotten on the Cyclone after eating one too many hotdogs despite Annabeth’s warnings (that hadn’t been a pleasant experience for either of them, nor the dude that sat in front of them). That was a different sick from what Percy was feeling now. His neck was tingling, and his stomach was twisting in knots. These had to be the Chitauri that Thor had mentioned. The thought of having these creatures invade Earth, his home, didn’t sit well with the Greek demigod. Loki had to be stopped.

The dream changed again, and Percy finally found himself in a place he recognized; a large loft overlooking half of Manhattan, paint supplies scattered around on the coffee table, and a big mural on one wall that featured the cabins of Camp Half-Blood. He was in Rachel Dare’s apartment.

Rachel herself was sitting on one of the leather couches, probably an old gift from her father when she had first moved into the loft. A sketchbook sat in her lap. Percy could sense that she was frustrated with something, most likely with the picture not coming out right. The demigod had seen some of her art blocks before and they were never fun to be around.

Percy wondered if she was working on a piece for college or for one of her clients. The demigod could still remember the big fight that had occurred between Rachel and her father that had led to her taking on clients to help pay for her college after her father dropped the pay. In the months that had followed, Rachel had made a decent amount of money. Percy had seen the amount some people paid for a small painting, and it made him wish he knew how to draw past stick figures.

Out of nowhere, Rachel jerked up. Percy reached out for her when he noticed that her eyes had turned green. The son of Poseidon reeled back a little, watching as green mist started swirling around them. Rachel’s mouth opened and the haunting voice that belonged to the oracle started speaking.

It comes from day as dark as night,

After evil's rule, the final fight,

They're gone, they're broke, they come together,

Charged to protect, earthly tether,

Rolling Stone, purple reign,

All must end in blazing pain.

As soon as the prophecy was done, the green glow surrounding Rachel faded and she started swaying. Percy rushed forward to help her, but she fell safely back into her couch. Her sketchbook fell off her lap and onto the floor, landing upwards and revealing what had been plaguing Rachel.

The sketch showed a tall building that Percy didn’t completely recognize, but he would know the surrounding skyline of New York anywhere. High above the city, in the sky, was a huge hole where Percy recognized the Chitauri flooding though. Just as his blood turned to ice, the dream started fading away, pulling him back to the real world.

Percy shot up in his bed, heart racing. He scrambled out of bed, reaching for a golden drachma and heading into the bathroom to make an IM. Percy turned on the shower and let the water flow through the light. He tossed the drachma through the water, asking Fleecy to patch him through to Rachel’s home.

Rachel’s distressed face appeared a moment later. “Percy!” She cried. “Why are you—”

”I had a dream about you last night.” Percy interrupted Rachel, cutting her off. She frowned.

“Please tell meet wasn’t one of those sexy kinds of—”

“No!” Percy shouted. “No, not that kind of dream. Although I’m not sure this is much better.”

“Percy, anything is better than you cheating on Annabeth.”

“You gave a prophecy.”

Rachel’s face turned serious. “What about?”

“I think it’s about the upcoming battle with Loki.” He paused. “I also saw the sketch you drew.”

“I was actually just about to call Chiron. Show him the sketch.” She turned around to pick up her sketchbook. “I just drew this last night. It wasn’t until this morning that I recognized the building.” Rachael held up the sketch. “That’s STARK Tower. I don’t know what those things are, but it’s obviously not good. What was the prophecy?”

Percy recited the prophecy. Rachel wrote it down in the corner of the sketch, like an artist’s signature. When Percy was finished, she sat there for a moment silent. “Blazing pain? They’re broke? This doesn’t sound like a typical prophecy.”

“What are you thinking?”

Rachel frowned. “I’m not sure. I might talk it over with Ella, see if there’s anything similar to this. Something I don’t understand, ‘the final fight’? What do you think that means?”

“I don’t know.” Percy shrugged. “Most times, the meaning isn’t clear until it’s happened. The only line I’m worried about is the last one.”

“I can see why. Make sure to stay away from any fire that might cause blazing pain.” Rachel sighed. “I’m going to call Ella, compare some thoughts, ideas.”

“Got it.” Percy gave her a wave. “See you later.”

“Later,” Rachel said before waving through the rainbow, leaving Percy standing alone in the bathroom. His mind wandered to his dream conversation with Loki, and the sick feeling he’d felt earlier returned as he came to the conclusion that prophecies were worse than dreams.

\~*~/

Percy didn’t know if he was allowed in any part of the ship that wasn’t the main area and his own room, not even one of the small supply closets in the halls. Fury didn’t seem to be the sharing type. That didn’t stop the demigod from wandering the huge ship.

After talking with Rachel, Percy had found the urge to escape the confines of his room. He started walking through the vast halls, trying to let go of his thoughts for a little while. It wasn’t too long in that he’d gotten lost. Percy was sure that he’d passed the same section of doors three times now.

“Mr. Jackson.”

Fury stalked towards Percy, clearly angry and annoyed with the demigod.

“Hey Pirate,” Percy gave him a wave. “Just checking out your man-o-war. Got a bit lost. Do you have maps to hand out?”

The director sighed. “Cut the pirate lingo and come with me.”

“Aye.”

Fury didn’t even bother with a glare at Percy’s remark. Percy followed Fury through the halls as the director led him past the residential hall and the main area and eventually into a conference room, complete with a fake plant in an attempt to try and make the room look cozier.

“What’s happening?” Percy asked.

“Please take a seat, Mr. Jackson.” Fury pulled out a chair and took a seat, gesturing to one of the empty chairs around the long table. “I just have a couple questions I’d like to ask you.”

“What kind of questions?”

“SHIELD does their homework, and we do it well. But even we can’t figure out everything sometimes. We just want a little help to make sense of some things.”

Percy hesitated a second before he pulled a chair out. “What do you want to know?”

“We’ll start easy. What’s the extent of your training?”

The son of Poseidon shifted in his seat. “Uh, I can fight with a sword?” It came out more of a question, unsure if that was what Fury was looking for. “I started when I was twelve. Um, I have control over water.”

“What all can do you with water?” Fury interrupted. “I know your father is Poseidon, but just how does that work? Do you have hydrokinesis?”

“Yeah,” Percy nodded. “I can also breathe underwater and even talk to sea animals. Horses too.”

Fury frowned slightly. “Horses?”

“My dad created them out of sea foam to try and win and be the patron god of Athens. But then Athena went and invented olives and for some reason they liked that better.”

“Mr. Jackson—”

“Just call me Percy.” The demigod told the director. “My father isn’t Mr. Jackson but hearing that just sounds weird.”

“Okay, Percy, I’m curious. This is the second time I’ve seen you wear that shirt.” He pointed at Percy’s CAMP HALF-BLOOD t-shirt. “What is Camp Half-Blood?”

Percy suddenly felt uncomfortable sitting in his chair. “Nothing really. Just a camp that I’ve gone to.”

Fury leaned forward, resting his arms on the table. “Percy, I’m interested in helping everyone, keeping the world safe and protected. I need you to tell me the truth. If you want, you don’t have to answer, but if Camp Half-Blood provides a danger to anyone, I need to know.”

“No one at Camp is a danger,” Percy assured. “It’s just a safe haven for demigods; a place for them to train and not have to worry about monsters hunting them down. If you’re worried about us trying to take over the mortal world or something, don’t.”

“Okay,” Fury leaned back but kept his hands on the table. “Okay. I just want to make sure. Can we continue?” At Percy’s nod, he asked, “What are the locations to the entrances of the underworld?”

“I’m sorry?” Percy said. “You want to know what now?”

“You heard me.”

“Pass.”

Fury sighed. “Fine. I suppose you won’t tell me the location of Olympus either?”

“Gods no,” Percy snorted. “I may not be the brightest, but I don’t want a death wish. My uncle would gladly kill me before that ever happened.”

“Just needed to ask.” Fury told Percy. “As I said before, you don’t have to answer questions you don’t want to. But,” he added. “it would be better for all of us if you were more forthcoming.

“One more question and I request that you answer this one, please.” Fury said, throwing in the please as an afterthought. “Is there anything that might warrant watching? Any threats?”

Percy thought for a second. There were several things he could mention, monsters for starters, but those weren’t the big problems. “Watch out for titans and giants. Most of them are still in Tartarus, the monster prison,” Percy explained. “but they just reform and come back. I don’t know how soon they would though after the wars.”

“What wars?”

Percy opened his mouth to start explaining about the war against Kronos and the one with Gaea, but a loud beeping noise stopped him. Fury seemed to tense as he pulled a phone out of his pocket. With a quick glance, he scowled. “Stark,” the director muttered with distaste before leaving the room.

Jumping up to join him, Percy followed Fury through the halls and into a lab were Tony and Bruce were sitting. Fury stormed into the room, Percy following just a couple steps behind. Tony and Bruce looked up as they entered. Fury stood in front of Tony who seemed to be watching a computer intently and not looking at Fury. “What are you doing, Mr. Stark?” The director asked.

“Uh...kind of been wondering the same thing about you.” Tony rebutted.

“You're supposed to be locating the Tesseract.”

“We are,” Bruce interjected. “The model's locked and we're sweeping for the signature now. When we get a hit, we'll have the location within half a mile.”

“And you'll get your cube back, no muss, no fuss,” Tony promised. Percy watched the billionaire frown as the computer beeped. “What is PHASE 2?”

There was a loud thud behind Percy. Steve had set down a large gun on the table, looking pissed. “PHASE 2 is SHIELD uses the cube to make weapons. Sorry, the computer was moving a little slow.”

Fury turned towards the captain. “Rogers, we gathered everything related to the Tesseract. This does not mean that we're...”

“I’m sorry, Nick.” Tony interrupted Fury, turning the computer around to show what seemed to be plans on building weapons. “What, were you lying?”

“And earlier you told me you wanted to help people.” Percy scoffed.

Right at that moment, Thor and Natasha walked into the lab. Banner turned to Natasha. “Did you know about this?”

“You wanna think about removing yourself from this environment, doctor?”

“I was in Calcutta; I was pretty well removed.”

“Loki's manipulating you,” Natasha told him.

“And you've been doing what exactly?”

“You didn't come here because I bat my eyelashes at you.”

“Yes, and I'm not leaving because suddenly you get a little twitchy.” Banner grabbed the computer and pointed to the weapon on the screen. “I'd like to know why SHIELD is using the Tesseract to build weapons of mass destruction.”

“Because of them.” Fury pointed at Thor and Percy. Percy’s eyebrows raised in shock.

“Wait, what?” Percy asked at the same time Thor asked, “Me?”

Fury sighed. “Last year, not only did earth have a visitor from another planet who had a grudge match that leveled a small town, but also learned about the existence of immortal gods whose affairs have started countless wars since forever. We learned that, not only are we alone, but we are hopelessly, hilariously, outgunned.”

“My people want nothing but peace with your planet,” Thor said.

Percy stepped forward. “Mortals have gone for centuries without knowing about the existence of the Greek gods living among you and you’ve been fine. We take care of our problems.”

“But you're not the only people out there, are you? And, you're not the only threat. The world's filling up with people who can't be matched, they can't be controlled.”

“Like you controlled the cube?” Steve asked, clearly not believing Fury.

“Your work with the Tesseract is what drew Loki to it, and his allies,” Thor informed Fury. “It is the signal to all the realms that the earth is ready for a higher form of war.”

Steve frowned. “A higher form?”

“You forced our hand. We had to come up with something.” Fury tried to explain, but by that time it had all descended into chaos.

Tony argued, “Nuclear deterrent. Cause that always calms everything right down.”

“Remind me again how you made your fortune, Stark?”

“I’m sure if he still made—” Steve started saying before he was interrupted by Tony.

“—Wait! Wait! Hold on! How is—”

“—weapons, Stark would be neck—”

“—this now about me?”

“—deep… I’m sorry, isn’t everything?”

“I thought humans were more evolved than this,” Thor commented.

Percy whirled on Thor. “Oh, I’m sorry, but out of all of us, who’s the one blowing up other planets?

“Did you always give your champions such mistrust?” Thor questioned Fury, ignoring Percy’s remark.

Everyone started shouting over one another. At one point, it got too hard to tell who was saying what.

“You understand that—”

“I can’t believe—”

“Are you boys really that naive? SHIELD monitors potential threats.”

“Captain America is on threat watch?”

“We all are.”

“Just a little concern, Doctor.”

“You're on that list?”

“Stark, just one more word…”

“Threatened. I feel threatened.” Tony shouted loud enough for everyone to hear.

”Cool it, tin can.” Percy shot. “They just said that everyone in this room is on that list, including you.”

“My suit isn’t tin, it’s a titanium-gold alloy.”

“You speak of control, yet you court chaos.” Thor’s voice boomed.

“It’s his M.O., isn’t it? I mean, what are we, a team?” Bruce started ranting. “No, no, no. We’re a chemical mixture that makes chaos. We’re… we’re a time-bomb.”

“You need to step away.” Fury told Banner.

Tony threw his hand on Steve’s shoulder. “Why shouldn’t the guy let off a little steam?”

“You know damn well why!” Steve pushed Tony’s hand away. “Back off!”

The two squared each other, turning face-to-face. There was a fire building in Steve’s eyes as everyone else turned to watch the showdown. “Oh, I’m starting to want you to make me.”

“Big man in a suit of armor. Take that off, what are you?” Steve asked him.

Without missing a beat, Tony replied, “Genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist.”

Percy’s eyes bounced between the two fighting men. It was like watching a tennis match, serving the ball back and forth to each other.

“I know guys with none of that worth ten of you.” Steve took a small step forward. “Yeah, I’ve seen the footage. The only thing you really fight for is yourself. You’re not the guy to make the sacrifice play, to lay down on a wire and let the other guy crawl over you.”

“I think I would just cut the wire.”

Steve let out a small chuckle. “Always a way out… you know, you may not be a threat, but you better stop pretending to be a hero.”

“A hero? Like you?” Tony scoffed. “You’re a laboratory experiment, Rogers. Everything special about you came out of a bottle!”

Immediately there was a change in the air as the room grew tenser. Steve’s face grew tighter and his jaw clenched. “Put on the suit, let’s go a few rounds.”

Thor laughed. “You people are so petty… and tiny.”

“As opposed to looking like a hippie surfer.”

“Yeah, this is a tee…” Banner muttered.

“Agent Romanoff,” Fury started to order. “would you escort Dr. Banner back to his...”

“Where?” Banner asked. “You rented my room.”

“The cell was just in case...”

“In case you needed to kill me, but you can't! I know! I tried!”

Everyone turned to Banner at his confession. The doctor took a second to regain some of his breath. “I got low. I didn't see an end, so I put a bullet in my mouth and the other guy spit it out! So I moved on. I focused on helping other people. I was good, until you dragged me back into this freak show and put everyone here at risk!”

Banner was getting more and more upset. He looked at Romanoff, who for the first time that Percy had seen, actually looked unnerved. “You wanna know my secret, Agent Romanoff?” Banner asked the redhead. “You wanna know how I stay calm?”

Percy reached for Riptide as soon as the Doctor grabbed the scepter. Out of the corner of his eye, the demigod noticed Fury and Natasha reaching for their guns. “Let’s not do anything rash now,” Percy spoke. “Put the scepter down and we can all go home happy and in one piece.”

Banner looked down and noticed he was holding a glowing scepter. His grip loosened, but he didn’t drop it. Shocked, the doctor stared at the scepter in his hands.

The computer beeped, breaking the moment. Banner quickly put the scepter back on the table and made his way over to the computer. “Sorry, kids. You don’t get to see my party trick after all.”

“Located the Tesseract?”

“I can get there faster.”

“Look, all of us…”

“The Tesseract belongs on Asgard,” Thor said. “No human is a match for it.”

“That’s fine,” Percy agreed. “As long as no one else on your planet tries to use it to take our planet.”

Tony turned to leave, but Steve held out one of his hands to stop him. “You’re not going alone.”

“You gonna stop me?” Tony argued.

“Put on the suit, let's find out.”

“I'm not afraid to hit an old man.”

“This is stupid!” Percy shouted. Everyone turned towards him. “Look, none of us by ourselves can defeat Loki and whatever army he’s bringing. We can only do this if we work together.” Percy took a second to scan his eyes over the group. “I don’t care if you guys think that the others are lame, I don’t. You can butt heads later. All I care about is making sure that New York City is still standing tomorrow.”

Everyone was quiet. Steve’s head hung a little, like he was ashamed. Tony just stared at Percy, looking away when Percy made eye contact.

At that moment, Banner, who had been looking at the monitors, gasped and said “Oh, my god!”

The ship shook violently, and a big burst of fire came up from the vent underneath, throwing everyone in different directions. Percy landed hard on his back just a couple feet from where he had been standing originally. He was left winded, desperately gasping for air. The room was filled with smoke. Percy heard Steve from somewhere in the room yelling, “Put on the suit!”

The demigod pulled himself up just in time to see Tony and Steve run out of the room. Fury and Thor were still getting back up. Percy ran a quick scan of the room, not finding Natasha or Bruce.

“Styx,” Percy swore as he headed for the door.

7

[ratsoh-writes]

Masterlist 36

suggestive: *****

General

what donut would they pick? (pop roost artemis stitches papyrus star hilda salt gold orion)

SO is walking around in thigh highs (dt fs drf lens silex sails orion)****

the bath bomb has a secret (pop sans willow sails peaches)

SO takes him to a bodypainting festival. (coffee orion charm gears)

are you seduced yet?

SO wants a baby so they leave baby clothes everywhere (dt fs drf silex partner)

SO forgot to get dressed (nt ft grt)****

SO hates using doors

SO paints them (nt lf)

SO wears lingerie (lf us bt)****

kiss attack! (grt gt ul)

SO has the power of doors (ut us sf fsr fsg)

SO has a birthday present for them (df dt fs uw bt)

whats saved their life (sf bt bbt of)

pillow fight (butch cash coffee hook rancher)

SO gets a fake goat (ut uf sf ht ls)

they get isekai'd (honey red sans mal)

SO leaves a kiss mark on him (dt df hdt bbt ftt fs)

monkey paw (st os bbt)

tax audit (cash sails weasel lens red harpy willow captain lush papyrus)

his bro gets kidnapped by the fae

he finds a dildo in SOs drawer****

he rocks SOs world (df fs dt sails lens orion silex)****

he speaks backwards for a week (fsg fsr ot ft st)

alien invasion (marcelo kevin snow grt ht flt)

SO is a pastry chef

his recently divorced bestie is hitting on his brother

dragon SO (ul lf ls)

SO is a caretaker for their disabled sibling (ht hs hf)

SO plays a wallpaper prank (dt fs df bbt lens silex)

they cant find their shoes (oak edge sans helios maple mango finn rhythm butch pitch)

an engkanto moves in (ht dt)

what would they do on vacation

SO gives them an immortal pet (fsg fsr weasel gold pepper pop pluto)

their stardew spouse

clown nose (ul ls lf)

if SO was friends with his rival (sans red willow jupiter edge)

what flavor of donut do they choose (pop hilda artemis roost stitches papyrus star salt gold orion)

SO wears thigh highs (dt df fs lens silex sails orion)

hotdog bath bomb advertisement (pop sans sails willow peaches)

Side character/new monsters

esther feller and middlemist's special abilities

rusalka, malgoth, gleeko (middlemist esther and feller)

Worldbuilding

grimmtale gleekos

beauty standards in rusalkas and gleekos

The Mafias

kiss my *ss

[junkazama]

Tagged by @capcomvssnk

Rules: Answer 30 questions and tag 10 people

# following: 491

# of followers: 2544 (it was 2551 before I posted porn a couple days ago and got mass unfollowed lmao)

Average hours of sleep: 5. At most.

Lucky number: 707

Instruments: viola and violin

What are you wearing: black boxer briefs and a white "boyfriend” t-shirt

Dream job: professional musician, leader of my own founded early music ensemble, and musicologist

Dream trip: Leipzig, Germany; Barcelona, Spain; Venice, Italy; Hokkaido, Japan

Significant other: He currently only exists in one of my 421 dream worlds, but I’m trying to develop reality-altering powers to bring him into the real world. (In other words, I don’t have one)

Birthday: February 13th because my mother just had to pop me out early to prevent me from being a Valentine’s baby smh

Height: 6′3″

Gender/pronouns: Male, he/his

Other blogs: @evahpirazzigold is my classical music blog. I did have a porn blog, but it wasn’t a sideblog and I forgot what its URL was and which e-mail I used for it, so it’s just floating out there in internet limbo now

Nicknames: Current: "Brine” (how southerners down here mispronounce my polysyllabic name), BryBry, B-Ry, Ms. Bitch/King Bitch/Prince Bitch (work joke), Mr. [insert last name of any coworker I currently have a thing for; also a work joke]. Former: Shabooty, Harpie/Harpie Lady (high school joke)

Star sign: Aquarius

Time: 9:41am as of this writing

Favorite bands: If we’re just strictly doing rock bands: Cage the Elephant, Disturbed, Rage Against the Machine.

Favorite artist: Alex Ross, Kevin Wada

Favorite tumblr artist: @pliskin

Song stuck in your head: What Lovers Do by Maroon 5 ft. SZA, Until Then by s/he

Last movie you watched: Black Panther, which I’ll probably be going to see again today since I skipped work today.

Last show you watched: The last thing on my Hulu is Barefoot Contessa.

Why did you make your blog: A now former friend of mine convinced me to join about 7 years ago and set up my blog for me, although it took me a long while to actually start using it.

What do you post: comic books, fighting games, half naked men, shitposts, humorous things, just a little bit of everything

Fandom contributions: Many of my fighting game gif posts are widely popular. My celebrity edits are popular with Marvel cast fan blogs.

Last thing you googled: cremona school of violin making

Ao3: I do not know what this is.

Do you ever get asks: Yeah, although mobile for some reason automatically opens them and marks them as read so I sometimes don’t see them until days later smh

How did you get the idea for your url: i’m a lowkey attention whore, so i needed a good url to make other people salty, and what better url than the main character of one of the most popular fighting games in the world.

Favorite food: cheesecake (either classic style or new york style) and plenty of its flavor variations, my mother’s mac and cheese casserole recipe (which I can make better than her), the general tso’s chicken at my local chinese restaurant, “American” type foods (hotdogs with chili, burgers, fried chicken sandwiches, etc), and most importantly: carrot cake

Last book you read: Wuthering Heights by Emily Brontë.

Top 3 fictional universes: Prequel trilogy Star Wars because it was beautiful as fuck before the Empire fucked up the government and ecosystems, Marvel Cinematic Universe because it’s basically just this universe except with super powers and aliens, any one of my made up daydream universes because my life is ideal in all of them lmao

Tag 10 people: lemme see, who didn’t Lou tag.... @dae-break @gochugaru @dobokun @joltikeon @sakkakumon @selfieswithsatan @bardock-the-father-of-goku @barebacktothefuture @sfex2 @michellechang @ironfist @theblackmegadeus @pliskin