#HONESTLY I'M STILL SCREAMING
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nightwingshero · 2 years ago
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"We love you and we will take you."
I had the absolute pleasure and honor to commission @delicateweapon to do the church scene with my respective FC5 babes. You got the vibes perfectly, and that contrast between Wren and Whitney is so spot on too! Its so good to see Rowan and Randy, and Rowan taking Jacob's spot is just...I can't stop staring at this piece. And Whitney as the Mother...I'd follow her anywhere. This was one of the big pieces that I have waited years to get and I'm so glad that I entrusted this to you. You've brought this to life in the most beautiful way and I'm trying not to cry because I'm so happy to finally see this happen. Nika, you're so talented and I'm so thankful to you for doing this for me. I honestly can't thank you enough, words are failing me, and as a writer, it means a lot. If anyone is looking to commission her, absolutely do it if you get the opportunity. You will not be disappointed. Super talented and an absolute sweetheart.
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patolemus · 2 days ago
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merlin magic reveal fic where arthur asks “why didn’t you tell me?” and merlin says, mirthless smile and haunted eyes “all my dreams end in fire. fire and burning and dying”
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sforzesco · 5 months ago
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I love how much Lucullus can't stand Pompey, and also this
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Pompey the Great: A Political Biography, Robin Seager
with something from this thrown in for extra flavor
Crassus and Pompey, on the other hand, ridiculed Lucullus for giving himself up to pleasure and extravagance, as if a luxurious life were not even more unsuitable to men of his years than political and military activities.
Plutarch, Lucullus
⭐ places I’m at! bsky / pixiv / pillowfort /cohost / cara.app / tip jar!
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arrgh-whatever · 4 months ago
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Permission to donate and blaze your post?
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p-permission granted
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yesokayiknow · 8 months ago
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human au. some of these guys spend too much time on here and it shows
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north-noire · 8 months ago
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father-daughter duo but with their usual expressions swapped.
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sysig · 11 months ago
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Two big softies(?) (Patreon)
#Doodles#Handplates#UT#Fellplates#Gaster#Flowey#Flowey is still my favourite UT character so honestly a lot of this was just self-indulgent doodles lol#But then - as always - it did turn into Thinking A Lot about [thing] lol#Starting with the classic tho! Flowey friendly-like coiled around whoever he's talking to ♪ It's too fun hehe#I love Flowey getting just a liiiiittle too close and personal to a discomfort degree ♫ He's just being friendly! It's a hug! A snuggle!#He's your best friend so you don't mind right? :) Why would Fellplates!Gaster mind ♪#He's always posed to stage right when I draw him haha - I'm still fond of the one Gravity Falls/Undertale crossover piece I made with him#Anyhow lol - yet more fluffy wings! It's just fun if they're expressive I want real feathers lol#Gaster's face completely neutral but his wings all puffed up and freaked out hehe#Flowey would definitely be able to tell if those are when he chose to wrap around!#If they were just the decorative version he'd fall right off from his own weight pulling them loose lol#Absolutely thinking of the one of Gaster screaming while being vine-wrapped by Flowey haha - he's totally innocent here! ♥#And then a little idea of how each of them react to humans - UkaGaster talks a lot about his general positive feelings for humans#And Fell!Flowey is.....well I have my own thoughts about how he might react to humans now that he's been...himself for a while#There have been Fallen Humans in the time between being locked in the Underground and [now] even in Underfell hasn't there?#I guess none of them would've made it as far as meeting up with Gaster - bit of a dark thought heh - but Flowey would know#Is it selfish? To wish for humans or to keep them a secret from the rest of the Underground? What might happen?#It's interesting to think about! If there were humans then surely Gaster must be aware of the Souls?#But even if not - even if this could be before all that - Flowey would still know about human Determination to an extent - being what he is#It wouldn't turn out well for anyone :) That's what makes it interesting ♪
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seaofreverie · 3 months ago
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A (very random) observation
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moe-broey · 3 months ago
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Amateur Hour but I gotta outsource this. Aromantics. Heed my call. What is "romantic" love to a non-believer?
Bonus Round if you're not entirely ace -- does experiencing any amount of sexual attraction influence your answer? Also acknowledging that both aro/ace identities exist on a spectrum. Believe me. I am deeply familiar... with so many kinds of spectrums........... 🧍
Also if this breaches containment It's Not That Serious........... just a personal question. For a friend. Me 🙂‍↕️
#was so tempted to put 'sometimes 'love' is just autistic obsession' as an answer bc on god#i do think that's a factor for me. like. espppppp in moe's case. moe is just Obsessed w alfonse.#extremely weird about him constantly studying him. like. it does feel like love... the intensity of it..... but.#both me and moe. most romance repulsed motherfuckers out there.#like. like. not to get too personal but the one relationship i did have. i genuinely felt i loved him#but i also think. so much of it was me reflecting what i Think love was 'supposed' to look like.#most importantly he was my best friend (at the time). and i def did feel differently about him than i did anyone else/even other friends#which is why i'm so conflicted... like half i did genuinely love him half i've never been able to love correctly#and it's always taken some level of putting on a performance according to what i see to 'perform' love#like. like. am i just autistic. does it just come down to the autism again.#but also esp nowadays like. back on my bullshit. i actually ALWAYS hesitate to call whatever moe has w alfonse 'romantic'#like. i think he does feel/experience romantic feelings. but moe is just so dysfunctional and messy#that like. i don't think it would call anything it feels about alfonse romance.#but it still completely adores him. in a way that's distinct from how it loves sharena and how it feels about anyone else.#even charas it admires. somehow. which honestly jusy leads me back to The Obsession again#also extremely focal is how the demisexuality kicks in. like. it's definitely not devoid of sexuality.#IDK IDK I'M TALKING TOO MUCH I'VE TALKED TOO MUCH AND I'M SO TIRED. I'VE BEEN SO TIRED#i'm not in my feelings honestly i'm just frustrated LMFAOOO LIKE. SCREAMING. WHY DOESN'T IT MAKE SENSE‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥#why am i preordained by fate to never be loved OR understood. wjat the hell man!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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if dorian didn't show up, do you think louis would have shot minnie?
I do. I know some people think either he wouldn't have or he would've missed so that's why the writers had him shoot Dorian instead, but mmmmmm no, I don't personally think so. I like to think that if he had taken the shot, his shaky hands would've caused him to shoot her fatally.
Mostly because I'm already so normal about the fact that of the Ericson crew, Marlon and Louis are the only ones with a body count. Well, that we know of, but shown to us in the game, at least. Plus, we know it's Louis' first kill.
Like yeah, Clementine and AJ become part of the crew and they have bigger body counts, and if we're counting indirect kills caused by actions, then Tenn has a count... and I guess everyone has blood on their hands for blowing up the boat... but I'm talking about killed directly with a weapon like....... I lied, I'm not normal about that at all, Louis and Marlon are the ones who have killed someone in Louis' route. I'm also not normal about the fact that Louis kills Dorian and then even as he's clearly in shock, he tries to go with Clementine to get AJ, and then later on when they talk about it, he says it feels like bile but not quite and he's glad he has it in him to do it.... listen, listen, listen... I'm obsessed with that.
Anyway, so if Louis shot Minerva, I think he would've accidentally killed her and can you imagine? He's already enough of a mess after killing the woman who pinned him down and tried to cut his finger off [or succeeded] but he knew Minerva, they were friends before the twins were taken. Even Violet couldn't kill her even though that would've been the smarter thing to do, and we know thanks to meta knowledge that killing her would've saved lives, but Violet couldn't, and I don't think Louis would intentionally either.
Speaking of Violet, if Louis killed Minerva, I hate to think about what that would've done to Vi. I think she might've actually left at that point, like what was planned before it got changed to her being burned. I don't think she would've attacked Louis over it, though, like yeah she attacked Clementine in the cell but Louis? I don't know, but I don't think so just because it's Louis and he'd be a mess about it anyway.
Though if he did kill her, it would be a neat parallel to draw... y'know, because Louis forgave AJ for killing Marlon even though he was pissed and heartbroken, and Violet was annoyed with him the entire time... but could she ever forgive Louis for killing Minerva? Y'know? We already have a similar parallel with AJ shooting Tenn, but still.
If Clementine killed Minerva in that moment, though, then I could see Violet attacking her since in her eyes, Clem proved her right.
So yeah, I get why they added the Dorian kill to his route. It adds another compelling element to Louis as a character, but we also need Minerva alive for episode 4; Louis can't kill her, he can't miss, and he's not going to stay with her because we need Violet to stay on the boat and him to be on shore for all routes.
#asks#twdg louis#twdg minerva#twdg clementine#twdg violet#twdg marlon#twdg tenn#honestly whenever i see someone say louis is the boring option i'm just like '.......that's your opinion but also how can you say that??'#then again i'm sure other people look at me saying violentine just isn't for me and they say the same thing so y'know... i can't talk haha#also time is such a weird thing because i look at the entire cell scene in louis' route and like... i'm not even mad about violet anymore#like yeah i still don't believe she was brainwashed like i'm sorry y'all only believe that because kent said something about it#not because there's all this evidence toward it in game like vi being pissed at clementine makes sense she doesn't need to be brainwashed#for it to work like her being vulnerable and easily manipulated into submission makes perfect sense especially with minerva there#it's like everyone was pissed that she attacked clementine and people needed a way to excuse it so it's not violet's fault when like...#that's literally what makes it interesting like calm down it's okay if violet is pissed and scared and behaves accordingly#also my controversial opinion of the day that i'll hide here in the tags so maybe people won't find it sksksk but#I personally find the concept of vinerva and the doomed tragedy of it more compelling than anything violentine did#like i'll defend violentine and i do believe it's an important and good ship it's just not my personal favorite#anyway but then the whole thing with lilly and minerva is so good and louis screaming FUCK YOU at minerva?? amazing love it so good#i love when the soft character who never chooses violence is so pissed off that all that anger they have boils to the surface and it's raw#like... he's SO mad he's SO furious he's SOOO UPSET like he wasn't even like this when marlon died or anything like he hit his limit#and then shooting dorian through the mouth while an accident is just well done i love it and i love his reaction of mortification#and apologizing and YET he still tries to go with clementine he's trembling and can barely string together a sentence but he wants to go#he wants to help her he wants to save aj THAT is the gut reaction he has after everything that just went down#'louis isn't loyal or good for clem because of the vote' babe tell me you don't understand any nuance of louis' character without telling m#it's fine IT'S FINE you don't have to agree and i just have to remind myself that it's fine not everyone likes louis we're okay#this drives me crazy in the best way like y'know what? i love the cells scene in louis' route all of it even the stuff i used to rant about#even the stuff that used to piss me off now i'm just like 'no wait past cj was dumb she wasn't looking at it this way aaaaaaaa' sksksks#that was my tag ted talk about the cell scene thank you
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trashlie · 1 year ago
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Continued dumb things that rattle around in my noggin at like, all times.
This is nothing new, of course; we have talked to DEATH how significant that moment of surprise is in the context of quimchee revealing that Nol likes a nice smile. But the additional context I enjoy is that we know by this stage the friendships Nol meant to be pretend were so real. We already can glean that Nol was very drawn to Shinae in a genuine way - both as a person he wanted to help but also as a friend he earnestly wanted to be friends with.
But, correct me if I'm wrong, this is the first time he sees her smile like that - at a time when she's clearly uncomfortable and miserable on the spot in front of so many people, without her comfort jacket, at an event he knows she's being forced to attend. And it's because of him.
Nol's whole thing is helping people, putting good back into the universe, trying to improve situations for other people. He's surely made Dieter and Soushi smile and laugh.
But here it feels SO loaded and significant. Shinae with her tall, dense walls. Shinae who has been so difficult to reach. Shinae whose friendship he genuinely wants, genuinely enjoys, despite how she tried to stay safe in her shell, in this uncomfortable moment laughing and smiling in such a bright radiant way.
He's a sucker for a good smile.
And he brought her that comfort.
I don't think it's necessarily an attraction thing as much as it's one of those very important bricks laid in their foundation. Nol doesn't in that moment consciously realize he likes Shinae. I think something just strikes him in that moment. That smile, that radiant joy, makes him feel something he can't identify.
THINK ABOUT IT. He's just come back from meeting Alyssa who immediately took off after Meg even though they haven't met in so long. Standing here watching Shinae endure an awkward, uncomfortable dance in front of strangers, everyone recognizes Kousuke - but not Nol. He's a stranger to his family's world, even to his girlfriend. He's just another guy in the crowd.
But there's Shinae, who sees him. The same Shinae who has taken notice of his scuffed knuckles. The same Shinae who, after the dance, immediately goes to him and asks about him.
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It's no wonder he says this.
I think seeing Shinae at the formal, clearly against her will, is the moment Nol remembers what happens to people he cares about. He got invested, he sought her friendship, and even though he doesn't know why she's there, he's certain it's her proximity to him. Even before Sangchul, before the pool, Nol remembered the danger.
It's after this he gives Kousuke his word that he'll avoid Shinae, and I think that's why. He already had the intention of distancing himself. It was supposed to be fake and he knew it wasn't and that he doesn't deserve her friendship he put her in danger by showing interest. She had drawn boundaries, she didn't even really want his friendship it'd be fine.
But then he made her laugh. But then she spotted him when no one else did. Then she burst into that bright, radiant laughter because of him and he probably knew: it was too late. He screwed up and yet....
Nothing is okay everything is messed up but he puts on that mask anyway. For friendship. Because he needs to. For her comfort. So he can convince himself he can actually pull away. So he can convince himself it doesn't mean anything else.
So he can convince himself someone cares about him, that maybe something is real even if real means danger.
(But he can't and we know it and we watch it over and over. It's too late and he just can't stay away.)
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samcscreams · 1 year ago
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Tara Knows AU: previous
“She know. Oh fuck. She knows.” Sam says as she jumps out of bed and makes it about two steps before collapsing on the floor. This might be the most hungover she’s ever felt.
Crawling towards the water and meds Tara had left for her, she tries to remember the night before.
“Come on Sam” she mutters to herself as she swallows the pills and chugs the water. Using her night stand she pushes herself up to try and walk again. She fails and falls back onto her bed.
“Moving can wait. First think” she says to herself
Sam ponders the night before. Rubbing her temples she remembers the party she went to and the six pack she brought. She remembers smoking on the back porch and someone yelling shots causing her to stumble back in side. She remembers thinking one won’t hurt. Oh fuck but it wasn’t just one. She blacked out. Normally Sam could put a few things together the next day. A blurry version of how she got home and got to bed. But nothing would appear in her head this time.
That’s when it hit her. She was gonna puke. Now Sam’s always been strong. She NEVER wanted to be the waisted girl at a party with her head in a toilet. She became a master of holding it down even the next day. She already had to deal with her mother drunk out of her mind. She didn’t want to be like that. Was she like that? Had she turned into her mother already? Was turning into her father not far behind? Sam’s head was spinning she had to move now or she’d be scrubbing her sheets all day.
With all the might she had she forced herself out of bed and down the hall to the bathroom slamming the door behind her and lunging towards the toilet.
Tara with her bedroom door open sees her sister fly by making her jump a bit.
“Sam?”
Sam, already hacking her guts up doesn’t hear her sister call after her
Tara, again was straddling the thought, help or don’t help. There’s so much she wanted to ask, to say. But the fear of pushing her sister away gripped her throat. Sam would come to her when shes ready, She thought to herself.
Through watery eyes and shaky hands Sam pulled her self off the toilet and stumbled over to the sink. She turned the faucet on and splashed her face. Life couldn’t possibly get any worse than this she thought to herself. It could and it would. Sam grabs the towel that’s next to her to dry her face. With a big sigh she finally looks up to see the mess she had become only to be startled by the dark brooding eyes of her father.
It had only been 6 months since she was diagnosed with schizophrenia and a year since she started to see him. Her meds helped but they were far from perfect. Certain drugs, and alcohol helped the sounds and sights quite. But with every success there’s always a failure. At 17 she was offered LSD for the first time. She thought oh what the hell what’s the worse that could happen. He is. He is the worst that could happen. All of here fear and worries perfectly personified into the one person she hated the most. Billy Fucking Loomis. Her father.
“No, fuck, not now” Sam said
“Oh yes now. Isn’t this amazing! She knows! God I can’t wait for you to tell her all about me” Billy said with a twinkle in his eye
“Tell her about you? In what demented world would I tell her about you?” Sam snaps back
“You really want to let her cultivate an opinion on her own Sam? Asking her little friends about me? How do you think that will go Sam? She’s your family don’t be so naïve. They’ll take her away from you.” His voice was low and sharp
Silence filled the air. Sam just stared at her father mouth slightly agape
“You know I’m right Sam. Come on. She’s your sisters Sam. SHES YOURS” His voice grew loud and angry snapping sam out of the trance like state she was in.
Sam shut her eye trying to make him go away “No no no she’s… she’s not mine. She couldn’t understand. I… i…”
“You can’t run away from this Sam.” He said
“Oh yes I can” she sneered
“You’re almost my age, it’s time to face the facts.” He said sternly.
“I…” Sams voice broke as she realized it’s true, her 18th birthday was but weeks away.
“Now that she knows you can do it together. How fucking cool would that be.” He continued
“Tara’s good. She would never been like you. She’s pure” Sam scoffed
Her sister could never be like him. She has no connection to him. Her blood isn’t tainted the way Sam's is.
“She might not be my blood Sam. But she’s is yours” he said while laughing
Sam couldn’t take it anymore and ran out of the bathroom hearing her fathers bellowing laugh follow in her ears. Only to not see Tara in the hallway and slamming right into her knocking them both down.
“Ow geez” Tara said rubbing her head
“Oh fuck Tara I’m sorry I didn’t see you” Sam said scrambling to her sister to help her up
“I’m fine. I’m more worried about you” Tara said as she stood up.
Sam’s immediate reaction is to push away and shut down. But the burning questions pertaining to the night before left her feeling extremely vulnerable
“Tara… I…” Sam at a total loss for words just looked at her sister. Those big brown eyes staring up at her begging for her big sister to let her in. Sam could feel the pin prick of tears behind her eyes and the fear gripping her guts.
“Saaaammm. Tell her. Tell her about me. Teach her Sam” Billy echoed through her head
“I… I can’t I’m sorry” Sam managed to finish as she took off to her bedroom leaving Tara abandoned on the hallway.
“Sammy please” Tara shouted. Surprising both herself and Sam.
Sam standing in front of her bed room door eyes locked on the door handle she had in her hand.
Tara feeling miles away yet only a few feet down the hall took a step towards her older sister. Tara didn’t know what she was going to do but she knew she couldn’t let her sister go. Not yet.
“I don’t know if you understood me this morning. But I know. And I don’t care Sammy. please I need you to talk to me” Tara barely finished before tears flooded her eyes.
“I know. I just. I don’t know how to talk.” Sam said as she fought every instinct to run to her sister and hold her while she cried.
“I don’t either. Maybe we can not know together.” Tara said with a shaky voice causing Sam to finally look up at her
“You don’t have to be alone anymore.” Tara exhaled wishing she could say what she truly wanted
“I don’t want to be alone anymore”
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meraki-yao · 11 months ago
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How does he look so good after getting off an international flight??
GOOD FUCKING QUESTION, I WOULD LOVE TO KNOW
And he actually got off the plane with his hair fine! Idk what the fuck happened after customs or on his way out that made his hair stand up, but even then he be looking great
AND AS IF THAT WASN'T ENOUGH, LITERALLY LIKE A LITTLE OVER AN HOUR AFTER HE LEFT THE AIRPORT, HE CLEANED UP ALL NICE AND IS NOW ATTENDING AN EVENT?????
WHAT THE FUCK TAYLOR, WHAT THE FUCK YOU MAGICAL MAN
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horangslay · 3 months ago
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well my day is ruined, Jeonghan is going to enlist like the next 6(ish) weeks so no more ot13 until 2030...
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lilowoof · 2 months ago
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ngl gamers, I think I'm gonna inevitably lose to the hormones and depression in the near future XD
Can't bring myself to be active cause I'm using a lot of energy to not vent post all the time. But fuck it, into the tags I go!
#I want NO MESSAGES regarding this. let me just be upset and alone#you spend most of your life trying to not succumb to sick brain but honestly I don't think it's worth it in the long run#my life is for better or worse....decent. but I've lost the drive and happiness to really DO anything a long time ago. like whats the point#the only reason I havent killed myself yet is cause Im too lazy (and dont have access to a gun for a quick getaway)#and I'm saying all this DESPITE having stuff to look forward to in the near future. it's like AUGH whats the POINT IM always gonna suffer#why does mental health take such a toll on ppl. this shit sucks ass. and I still feel excited for things in the future too? somehow?#but I also really want to die so. idk man. idk. maybe if I fall in love with someone then I can be distracted but all my walls are up#what's the point in anything anymore. *I* have to take the steps to improve myself and my situation#and I'd rather die. anyways who wants to make a pact that once we reach 40 we will marry each other#that might be fun#also my brain has gotten so bad that I am literally considering joining a hiking club to get out more and I FUCKING HATE HIKING#but I should probably do something out of my comfort zone to push myself and who knows maybe I will find a new passion#but let me tell you about the anxiety - oh BOY it's starting to act up again. hahahha#ah well sometimes you just need to scream your feelings out in the tags to get a lil clarity from the brain fog#one day I will fucking die/kill myself but for now I'll just try to make the best out of. whatever the hell this stupid life is. *shrug*#(but hey if any professional hitmen are reading this. feel free to. heh. you know ;) )#also I need to get back to art#gotta do my paid work and that one pic I lined months ago. and clay stuff *continues to bed rot another week because hahahahahahaha*#ah I wish I didn't fail all those years ago. then I would be free. I wish I was free#ok goodnight I promised myself that I would do paid work when I wake up tomorrow so hopefully no more migraines -pray emoji-
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wistfulwatcher · 1 year ago
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i feel like your roman candle; misty/nat, 8k, explicit
written in response to a series of tumblr erotic prompts (since i ended up getting many more than i was expecting, i have combined the ones that fit!).
prompts used: caught masturbating, torn lace, against the wall, fingers (@igotreallyreallytiredofmyoldurl), “do that again”, hair, panting, love bites, taste, restrained, desperate, tease, on the edge, and in public (if you squint)
read here on ao3
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