#HIS DIMPLES WILL FOREVER BE MY FAVE THING ABOUT HIM

[baconnotbaekhyun]

[theitgirlnetwork]

Better

Ch. 11: Three Months But It Feels Like Forever

Note: Hello! Happy Thanksgiving to those who celebrate it and just a warm hope you had a good day to those who don't. Another chapter written in the middle of the night, so...you know. Still I hope you enjoy it. Unfortunately our fave couple still has troubles ahead, but there's a fun, a little (a lot) crazy surprise at the end. As always, thank you for all of the love on this story, I'm really grateful for it. It really inspires me and makes this stuff even easier to share. You're all great. I love interacting so feel free to continue. Also this is short but the next one will be longer bc it's something big. Also again, this taglist situation is probably my bad so I'm gonna sort it out, try again next chapter, and then y'all can tell me if it worked, bc atp I'm embarrassing myself. Thanks and I hope you enjoy. <3

Charlotte's Work Party Look

Lip's Work Party Look

“So this is bullshit. He dumps her for one basketball game?”

“That’s not what happened, he was having an inner conflict, and he was only sixteen.”

“Sixteen year old piece of shit.”

Charlotte huffs, continuing to run her fingers through his blond curls. Lip is laid across the couch, his head in Charlotte’s lap, hand underneath her thigh. Debbie is sitting on the floor in front of the television and Troy Bolton had just told his friends he didn’t give a shit about Gabriella. 

“He’s just choosing basketball and his friends.” Debbie protests, breaking free from her basketball boy trance to argue with her brother.

“Basketball and his friends can’t get his dick wet-ow! Charlotte.” he winces, rubbing the spot on his scalp where his girlfriend had decided to bury her hand and tug. “Damn it, I was just sayin’ he’s got like one game left in the season, why does he need to break up with her to play? And that shit she just wrote on the board is wrong-why the hell are we watchin’ this shit?”

“You just don’t get it.” Debbie huffs, pausing the movie. She pushes off of the floor and grabs the popcorn from the coffee table. “Let’s watch try again when he’s not here.”

“Oh excuse me.” Lip rolls his eyes as his sister storms off, running up the steps. When he looks back up at his girlfriend, her cheek is dimpling with her deep frown. “What?”

“You ruined movie night” she fake pouts, rubbing her hand along his chest.

Lip smirks, before indulging her, sitting up and tilting her chin with his finger. “Aw, did I?” he kisses her cheek, “I don’t think I did.” her jaw, “We could go in my room and make our own movie.”

“Yeah?” Charlotte hums, meeting his lips briefly with her own before pulling back. “Can’t. I have work.”

“Stay here,” he murmurs, pulling her back to him. “You can dance for me.”

Giggling, Charlotte lets herself be pulled back in, exchanging kisses with the blond until his phone buzzes on the couch next to him, a dreaded name lighting up on the screen. She pulls back fully this time, standing to go get dressed. “Your professor is texting you. At 8:36 at night.” 

Blue eyes watch Charlotte disappear up the staircase before closing tiredly. Lip had been dodging almost all of Helene’s communications. He would read her texts to make sure they had nothing to do with his job, and only responded when they did.  He’d hoped that was enough, but everytime Charlotte saw that name pop up on his phone she would retract from him. Leave the room, pick up Liam, interact with anyone but him. One morning she asked again, if she had a thing for him, or if they’d hooked up in the past. No matter how much he wanted to, Lip just couldn’t bring himself to answer her with a yes.

“Fuck,” he breathes to himself, before running up the stairs after her. He pushes the door to his bedroom open. “Charlotte-” he pauses, staring at her, taking in her form. She stands in her work outfit, if you could call it that, the only thing offering an ounce of covering is the one leg of a juicy tracksuit she was putting on over it. “Um, what the fuck?”

She turns, meeting him with confusion, giving him a glimpse of the front which only has him letting out a laugh of disbelief. “What?”

“What? You’re gonna wear that to work?”

“Oh,” she shrugs, putting her leg through the other hole and pulling the pants up. “Yeah.” she chirps, reaching past him to grab the matching jacket, zipping it over the small bikini top she has on.

“The only thing that shit covers is your nipples.” Lip says, scratching his head.

“S’a stripclub, Phillip. They’re supposed to see stuff.” she giggles. Her laughter stops when she sees his stoic face. Charlotte makes her way over to him, cupping his cheek, “Hey, you said you were good with this. You’re not?”

Lip looks away from her for a second, shifting on his feet. He’s too embarrassed to admit to her that he thinks he agreed to this whole stripper situation too soon. He’d never been a jealous guy, so he didn’t think it was a problem, but he supposes that jealousy is a new feeling that Charlotte had brought into his life. “No, baby I am, just…shit.”

“What shit. Like shit? Or shit.”

Lip closes the distance between them, waiting for her to meet him in a peck, patting her ass when she does. “Watch your mouth.” he mumbles against her lips.

Big brown eyes just stare up into his blue ones. “M’workin’ for us, remember?” She whispers, wrapping her arms around his neck and rubbing his hair at the nape. “Besides, why would I look at the losers that hang out at the club, lookin’ at me all night when I could come work and be with my sexy boyfriend?”

“Good point.”

“Yeah?” she laughs, letting him pull her into a bunch of small pecks, between matching smiles. The couple starts to get lost in each other again, only breaking away at the sound of Lip’s phone going off again. Charlotte pulls back with a blank look on her face. “Your other girlfriend is trying to reach you.”

Lip rolls his eyes and sighs as she slips past him again, running down the stairs. “Bunny-”

“Just take me to work, Gallagher.”

“You do privates, honey?” A drunken man slurs, leering at Charlotte, waving a hundred dollar bill in front of her face. He’s with a group of older men who’d been tipping shittily and buying the cheapest drinks since they’d gotten there.

“No, sir I don’t, but the ladies that do are on the other side of the club…and they charge more than that.”

The man’s lip curls as he stands, scowling at the woman. Charlotte subtly takes a step back, glancing over at security, ready to call them if he got aggressive.

“Hold on, wait a minute, Trent. That’s my daughter in law you’re talkin’ to.” a voice rasps. 

“Frank?” 

The scraggly man emerges from the crowd of older men on the couch, positioning himself between Charlotte and the other man. “The one and only.” His gaze drops briefly. “Nice outfit.”

Charlotte wraps her arms over her chest and frowns at the man. “What’re you doing here, Frank?” She looks at the group behind him. “Are you in trouble?” 

“Trouble? I’m enjoying the ambience! You and your lovely naked friends are a sight to behold-”

“Oh, God, Frank!” Charlotte gasps, covering her mouth to hide her disgust. 

“What? You have a beautiful form!”

“I’m calling Phillip.” she huffs, turning to go to the locker room, she pauses as a thought passes through her mind. Twirling back around she makes her way back over. “Frank, what are you paying with?”

“Oh,” the older man produces a sock full of cash from his pocket. It’s familiar to Charlotte. Ever since Frank and Monica located the first squirrel fund, Fiona had started keeping the money in a new place. In the dry rotted hole on the floor between the wall and the dryer. Inside of the sock that Frank was currently dangling in Charlotte’s face. “I came into some money.”

“Hey, that’s-” Charlotte tries to grab it, only for Frank to yank it away at each attempt. “For the house! For bills, for Carl’s field trip this month-”

“That’s my house that you’re shacking up in fyi. This is Gallagher money, and therefore it’s mine to spend. Now point me in the direction of the ladies giving private dances. I’m a private man.”

“Frank, I can’t let you spend that-” Charlotte argues, grabbing one end of the sock and pulling. Frank is tugging at the other until he stumbles into a table, causing a couple glasses to fall and shatter, leaving Charlotte with the sock. Charlotte stands over the man angry, disgusted, and feeling a wave of hate she’s never really felt for anyone. Up until this point, she really didn’t consider Frank beyond the far and few in between memories Lip shared. But now she was seeing the man be shitty live and in person. And she was fed up. “It’s for your fucking kids you deadbeat!”

Two seconds later security is grabbing Frank and the manager on staff that night, Sarah, is pulling Charlotte a couple steps away. She can distantly hear Lip’s father yelling and cursing as he’s dragged from the club. “Lottie, what happened?”

“I…Frank is my boyfriend’s father, and he’s trying to spend their house money, and he was being a dick about it-”

“Okay, okay. Well, Frank knows he’s not really supposed to be in here anyway, so it won’t happen again. The new guy at the door must have let him slip through. But, because a personal altercation occurred out on the floor, I have to send you home, babe.”

“Damn, really?” Charlotte whines, looking at the crowd starting to pour into the club, no doubt big spenders. She could practically see the dollar signs fading away. Sara offers her a sympathetic look, shrugging. “Fine, okay, let me call my boyfriend to pick me up.”

Lip had been dead asleep when Charlotte let him know she needed to be picked up from work. He has work tomorrow and so in an attempt to get some real sleep, he was in their room at V and Kev’s house, taking advantage of the quiet. He’d rushed over to get her, grabbing Kev’s car keys without asking and noting to himself that a car should probably be the first thing on their list to purchase with the Bunny Bank. When he pulled up out front she was already waiting there for him, the big burly security man, John waiting beside her to walk her to the car. 

He and Lip exchange nods as Charlotte climbs into the car pouting. “What happened?” Lip immediately questions, barely letting the door closed. “Someone was fuckin’ with you?”

Charlotte huffs, buckling her seatbelt, allowing him to turn the light on and try to check her for any bruises or injuries. “No…kinda, just- your dad showed up.”

“Fuckin’ Frank.”

“Yeah, right, and he had all of your house money, and I tried to get it back, and he wouldn’t give it back, and we fought and I told him he was a piece of shit deadbeat.”

Lip frowns at that. He hates this part of having a girlfriend. It’s fucking humiliating. He doesn’t know how Fiona lets a bunch of different guys get involved with their family shit. Finding Frank drunk in the yard, Monica coming and spewing her bullshit, now Frank was showing up at Charlotte’s job. And she was fighting with him over money he’d stolen from his children. It’s fucking embarrassing. “Yeah, well, that’s Frank, don’t worry about that shit okay?”

“Well he was stealing from-”

“Fiona and I handle it, it’s not your problem, alright?” Lip says, muscle in his jaw jumping in irritation. 

From the corner of his eye he can see Charlotte stare at him with a hurt expression for a moment, before sitting back in the passenger seat, facing forward. “Okay.” she drops the sock full of money on his lap.

The rest of the ride is quiet, Lip drives her through dingy streets, in a borrowed car and wallows in shame. Charlotte is leaning as far into the door as possible, far from him. When they pull up to their neighborhood she hops out of the car before Lip can open the door, going over to Kev and V’s house. Lip follows a couple paces behind quietly, assuming the fact that she’d left the door unlocked was a sign she still wanted him to come with her. 

As he enters the room he finds Charlotte already in her pajamas, curled up on the bed facing the wall. Small movements let him know she’s crying. The blond quietly slips behind her, wrapping his arm around her waist and resting his face against hers, pressing soft quiet kisses against her cheek. “M’sorry, baby.”

She just offers a sniffle in response.

Lip sighs loudly, dropping his head to the desk. His eyes fucking burn. He got little to no sleep after he’d basically told Charlotte off and made her cry, and she was quiet as hell this morning. He was such a screw up. “Fuck” he curses, grabbing a cigarette and his lighter from his bag, leaning back in his desk chair as he sparks it. 

“Gallagher! You have a visitor!” Eric calls from the hallway. Immediately, Lip’s mind goes to Charlotte. Maybe she was feeling better and didn’t fucking hate him for telling her off for caring about him.

“Let her in!” 

The door creaks open revealing Helene with a condescending smile plastered on her face. “You’re a hard man to hunt down, Phillip Gallagher.” 

He just sighs, exhaling a cloud of smoke into the air. “M’busy.”

“With what? Work or your girlfriend?” Helene sits in the chair across from Lip, crossing her legs, rolling her eyes when he doesn’t bother answering, taking another drag. “I’m kidding. But you have been ignoring my calls.”

“Well, you’re here now. What’d you wanna talk about?”

A muffled voice that could only be Eric’s is heard through the door. “His office is this way. You look great by the way.” The door to Lip’s office pushes open again, and who enters this time has him shooting out of his seat.  “Gallagher, your girlfriend’s here.” Eric grins, tucking his hands into his pockets as Charlotte slowly makes her way in, eyes flicking between Lip and Helene.

“Fucking shit, okay-” Lip mumbles under his breath, holding his arm out for Charlotte to come to him. He watches as she rolls her shoulders back, standing straight and walking behind Lip’s desk, leaning into him. “Hel-Helene, this is my girlfriend Charlotte, Charlotte, this is my old Professor Helene.”

“Nice to meet you, young lady.” Helene says, holding her hand out.

Charlotte takes a deep breath before setting down the bag she was carrying in her hand, reaching over and taking Helene’s hand. “Nice to meet you too, Mrs.-”

“Miss.”

“Ms. Helene.” Charlotte finishes, a tight smile on her face. 

The blonde woman laughs, tossing her head back. “Just Helene is fine.”

“Mm well, I dunno. Doesn’t seem right.” Charlotte shrugs, leaning further into Lip. “Thank you, by the way, for helping him get this job, it’s been wonderful.”

“You’re welcome. It was no problem at all, Phillip is a special boy.”

“I know,” Charlotte grins even harder, roughly patting Lip’s cheek. “A very special man. So proud of him.” 

Lip watches the exchange trying to figure out if he should be nervous, laugh, or think it’s hot that Charlotte is staking her claim right now, running her hand along his hair, face and chest as she pretends to smile at Helene. 

Eric clears his throat stepping further into the room himself. “Charlotte, something smells great, and it came when you did so either you smell amazing or you cooked something.”

“Oh, I,” She takes a piece of blue tupperware out of the bag, placing it in front of Lip. “I made you lunch, you didn’t eat breakfast this morning and you didn’t take lunch so…I thought we could eat and talk, but, I see you’re busy.” 

Lip turns to her, voice softening as he grabs her hand. “Bunny, I’m sure I can-”

“Oh, that reminds me.” Eric sighs, tapping his own forehead. “I meant to give you some assignments from my dad, I know it’s your lunch break, but you’d have to stay late otherwise.”

“Fuck.” Lips breathes, running his hand through his hair. 

“It’s alright bro, I could take Charlotte to lunch.” Eric offers, not withering under the looks he received from the couple. “My girlfriend and I are meeting up anyway, let the girls hang out and spend my money, Becca’s always looking for a partner in crime.”

Charlotte looks at an apprehensive Lip. And she knows it’s wrong, but the way he and the cradle robber across the desk interact makes her feel petty. “Sure, if Lip’s busy.”

Lip fixes Charlotte with a look of betrayal that has her questioning her decision, but Eric is already guiding her away from him out of the door. Yeah, fuck that. Lip thinks, grinding his teeth as he goes to follow them out of the door. Helene’s hand shoots out to stop him before he can get far. “Oh, and Lip, before you get back to work, there’s a work dinner for all of the different departments that I’m hoping you’ll attend. I mean, I know your boss, Mr. Avery is excited to meet you there.”

“Look, uh, Helene, I mean, thank you for all of this. For the job, recommending me and shit, but,” He scratches his nose, “the texts, the calls, they have to stop. Like, now you’re visiting, and that’s weird, you see I have a girlfriend so…”

“Of course, I wouldn’t ever want to disrespect that, I just thought, after everything, we could be friends.” Helene stands, grabbing her purse. “Well, I can see now that’s inappropriate. But you really should come to this party. It’s good for your career to make friends and shake hands. Bring Charlotte with you.” 

Lip tucks his head, “I dunno, I don’t…don’t really think Charlotte is gonna be in the mood, we uh, need to talk.”

“No matter what was going on, my husband and I always made it to each other’s work functions. We always supported each other’s careers. If someone can’t do that for you, are they really the one?”

The young man recoils, frowning at the implication. Yes. She is. Period. Full stop. They were out of tune today, but Lip knows what he knows. And he knows he and Charlotte are there for each other. He knows they love each other. He knows that these past few months were the best of his life. Even when he and Charlotte weren’t on good terms, he knew he wouldn’t want to be struggling to communicate with anyone else. “You uh, mean ex-husband. And she’ll be there.”

Helene barely hides the hurt look on her face before she lets out a short, “Great.” 

“Do you think this is okay?”  Charlotte twirls, the skirt of her brown dress flaring around her gives Lip ideas that he knows he shouldn’t be having. Especially while they were fighting. Kinda. Something else he’s learned over these last few months is that Charlotte holds stuff in. When she’s upset she doesn’t explode like his family does, shit like he does. Breaking property, getting arrested, fighting. She doesn’t withhold affection like Helene and Karen used to. No, she still let him touch her. Quietly letting him press his lips to her cheeks, not moving when he rubs his hips, bringing him lunch. It was the stillness. The angry tears. The lack of warmth that let Lip know things were strained. And it hurts. 

“You look great, bunny. Fuckin’ beautiful.” Lip says from his bed, tapping his cigarette ashes into Ian’s ashtray.

“Okay, good. You ready?” Charlotte asks, smoothing her hands over her dress as she looks in the mirror. Her voice is so devoid of emotion, but her eyes are extremely expressive. Big brown pools full of sadness as they meet his in their reflection. 

But Lip is new to this. New to trying to maintain. New to trying to keep someone of value. “Babe, uh, should we talk or somethin’?”

Charlotte takes a deep breath before turning to Lip with a tired smile. “Later. Let’s get you to your work thing and after you wow them with your big genius brain, we’ll leave early and try to get on the same page.”

“Yeah?” he stands, looking down at her.

Charlotte just shrugs, reaching over and adjusting his tie with a small smile playing at her lips. “Yeah.”

And that’s the game plan. When they arrive at the party, which they find is being hosted at a friend of the company’s house. If one could call it that. It looks like a fucking mansion, down to the marble columns. Lip felt out of place, everyone here looked so…expensive, and not in the ‘I worked my ass off way’. He felt different than he did when he’d met Helene’s friends back when they were hooking up. The only thing preventing the bounce in his leg as he basically paraded his intelligence to the highest bidder with the future of his family on the line, was Charlotte’s soft, steady hand on him at all times. Fingers intertwined with his. Rubbing circles on his back. Rested on his thigh as she leaned into him. All Lip could think about was the fact that he was here for her, for them. He could secure their futures together if he turned this internship into a permanent job. He could…could…shit. Is that what he wants? Hell, is that what she wants?

Lip’s thoughts are interrupted by Eric and Rebecca’s entrance. The latter immediately beams as she sees Charlotte, squeezing her way between crowds of people, turning her nose up at a tray of hors d'oeuvres being passed in front of her face. “Lottie!” she cheers, tugging Charlotte up by her hands, pulling her into a hug. “You look gorgeous my love, who are you wearing?”

“Um, I’m sorry, my mother got me this dress, but if you wanna pull the tag out-”

“Oh, no, honey it’s fine. You can call me with outfit details later, I need to go find Eric’s bitch of a mother.” she murmurs under her breath. “Sorry I couldn’t make lunch earlier, but thanks so much for reminding that asshole to bring me something. It’d be just like him to go to my favorite restaurant and bring me nothing.” Rebecca scoffs, tossing her hair before fixing a fake smile on her face, leaving to find her boyfriend’s mother. 

“You,” Lip pauses, laughing in disbelief as he stands, looking between Eric and Charlotte. “You went to lunch together. Alone.” He nods to himself, still chuckling, slowly walking closer to Eric. 

“Phillip.” Charlotte tries, putting her hand on his arm. “Phillip, we were already there when Rebecca said she wasn’t coming, stop.”

“Yeah, man, it’s nothing serious, I just took your girl to lunch, she’s probably never been to the nicer restaurants in Chicago before-”

“Man, I’m about to knock your fuckin’ head off.” the blond continues, calmly putting his drink down, the force making a sound that gathers the attention of passersby. Charlotte tugs at Lip again, pleading to him his ear, telling him to go get their jackets and she’d use the bathroom. 

“Please, Phillip. Please. Just go get the jackets. Please. We don’t have to talk to him. Please.” she begs, cupping his face. Eric huffs as he watches the woman coddle her boyfriend and takes a deep swig of his drink wandering off to go find Rebecca. 

Lip runs an angry hand through his hair stalking off to the room where the jackets are being kept without saying a word, trying to maintain his temper. But of fucking course. Of course he’d meet a girl like Charlotte. Of course she’d make him fall in love with her, and like a fucking idiot, he would. And of course they’d meet a jackass like fuckin’ Eric who wanted her, who could give her the things she deserved like nice dinners, cars, houses, the pretty fucking outfits she likes to wear. He could give her that without planning for months, saving, taking money in and out of their joint savings to take care of his batshit family. Lip slams the door behind him, going to sift through the coats before pausing, hearing sniffling from the other side of the room. “Uh, hello?”

“Oh, I’m sorry,” a watery voice says, stepping out from the closet area Helene is clutching a tissue in her hand, going over to Lip. “I’m sorry, it’s just-” her words are cut off by sobs.

“Uh, shit, sit down.” Lip says, guiding her to sit on the bed in the room. 

“I…my son just called, let me know he made it back to school okay. And…it slipped in conversation, his father went on a date. He’s started seeing someone. I’d thought…he’d maybe surprise me by coming here. Oh, and I was so rude about Charlotte earlier, but my partner is the one not here.”

Lip watches awkwardly as the older woman sobs, placing his hand on her shoulder after a moment, glancing around. Sure he felt bad for her, but after all this time, he’d realized she really had been a bitch to him. And her ex-husband. He’d thought so highly of her before, thought she was the best thing that would ever happen to him. Now she was crumpling in front of him and he could barely bring himself to comfort her. “Sorry. But, I thought that was like…you guys’ thing. Fucking other people.”

“No, that was more me, he…tolerated it.” 

“Oh. That’s…shitty.” Lip whistles.

“It is.” Helene sighs, sniffing one last time. She wipes her face before fully looking at Lip. “I think I was filling some kind of void you know? Low self-esteem, issues with aging, I have them all. The only relationship I had outside of my marriage that meant anything is you.” 

They hadn’t even heard it. At least, Lip hadn’t. The door opening. The sound of Charlotte coming to check on him since he hadn’t returned with their jackets. But he did hear her curse before slamming the door. He couldn’t move fast enough, leaving Helene behind he slips between the bodies of movers and shakers in scattered throughout the house, swinging open the door and running down the steps, finding Charlotte stumbling in the grass as she kicks off her heels, grumbling. “Charlotte!”

He catches up to her quickly, grabbing the car keys from the valet stopping at Kev’s truck. The woman keeps walking, head held high as she limps out of the gate. “Charlotte, are you serious? Get in the car.”

“No!” 

“Fucksake.” he growls, getting into the car and backing out of the driveway, following alongside her slowly as she makes her way on foot. “It’s fucking dark, get in the car.”

“Leave me alone.” she huffs, crossing her arms, whining to herself about the dirt touching her feet.

The muscle in Lip’s jaw jumps, his scowl going deeper. He reaches over and lights a cigarette, smoking out of the window. “You know, you’re the one who went on a fuckin’ date with someone else today.” 

Charlotte laughs, speeding up. “It wasn’t a fuckin’ date. His girlfriend was supposed to go, and she canceled. We were already there, and you were too busy eye-fucking that old professor that you conveniently left out you used to literally fuck.” 

“I really don’t wanna talk about eye-fucking when you get naked for half of Chicago, alright?” Lip grits. Too far. He knows it immediately. He watches her stop, and look at him with hurt he never wants to see, her tear tracks shining in the lights from the streets. His own eyes glisten with unshed tears. He puts the car in park, cigarette still balanced between his lips as he hops out walking around the side and grabbing a kicking, protesting Charlotte by her waist, tossing her over his shoulder. Lip places her in the car and slams the passenger door before getting back into the driver’s seat, staring forward at the road.

Charlotte pettily snatches the cigarette from his mouth, opening her window and flicking it to the road. “Why didn’t you tell me you dated her?”

The blond takes a deep breath, letting his eyes slip closed. “I was embarrassed, and I thought it’d freak you out. That you’d ask me to quit cause she helped me get the job. And I would if you asked me to.”

“I would too. Quit. If you asked me to.” Charlotte sighs.

“I don’t wanna ask you to do that. You like it, it's good money, shit you just started. But I do hate it. Thought I wouldn’t, but I do.”

“So, we’ll talk about it more. Until we both know where we stand on it.” she says, facing forward too, she's quiet for another beat before speaking again. “I’m telling the truth about Eric.”

“I know.” Lip scrubs his hands down his face. “I know. And I am sorry that I yelled about that stupid shit with Frank. That bullshit just shouldn’t be your problem.” 

“I want it to be my problem. I love your family and I love you. I want to be part of it. I want…I want to be your family. So I care about the money you guys saved being stolen, I care if Liam’s diapers get bought, and I care if Carl gets to go on his field trip.”

“Fuck, bunny, I know you care. I just don’t want you to deal with that shit, it’s fuckin embarrasin’ you having to see my family like that. Having to kick in money for the house.”

“It’s stuff I wanna do. Ian doesn’t walk on eggshells with Mickey. None of you do. You treat him like an honorary Gallagher. Why can’t you do that with me?”

The couple turns to each other now, Lip reaching over the console, grabbing Charlotte’s hand. “You’re fuckin’ better than us, bunny.” He says, one tear finally falling.

Charlotte reaches up, wiping away the drop before smoothing his hair. “You’re gonna stop talkin’ about my boyfriend and our family like that. Nothing is better than you.” She smiles as Lip brings her hand to his mouth kissing her hand. “Well, except Chad in high school musical, I mean, I let the Troy slander go, but he’s different-” she laughs into the kiss that he pulls her into, the two of them smiling into the embrace as they share soft, tender kisses. 

The pair stays like that for a while. Wrapped up in each other. Sitting in the dimly lit car, running Kev’s gas on the side of the road without a care in the world. After a few moments of peace Lip decides to take a risk. It’s a big one, a very Fiona style decision. But those were random loser fuckers who got her off when she was vulnerable. This, this is Charlotte. His Charlotte. Who'd singlehandedly made his life better in the short time she'd been here. Who he loves an unexplainable amount that almost pisses him off. And he’s scared. Fuckin’ terrified. But he has to try.

“Sweetheart, how long have we known each other?”

Charlotte scoffs, playing with his fingers with an absent smile. “Well, three months, but it feels like forever. You know, I never know if people mean that in a good or bad way. I mean it the good way, obviously.” she beams at him, looking into his eyes and finding him with a serious face, her smile fades. “What?”

“Do you work tomorrow?”

“Hm, nope, not supposed to. You?”

His chest tightens as he answers her. He doesn’t believe in stars aligning, or cosmic whatever, but he thinks that this might just be the fate shit that Debbie is spewing all the time that makes no scientific sense. “Nah, I uh…threatened my boss, so I gotta see if I still have a job. I think he has a thing for my hot girlfriend that I’m..I’m uh really in love with.”

“If he does, he doesn't stand a chance. Because I really love my boyfriend.” she hums. If anything was gonna be his confirmation, Lip thinks this is it. Those words were enough. “So what’s with the questions? You wanna do something?” she asks cutely, leaning her cheek into his hand.

This is it.

He looks down into her brown eyes and decides this is what he wants to see forever. Looking at anything else sucks anyway. 

“Yeah, um…”

Just fuckin’ do it pussy.

“You wanna go get married?” 

[randomingoftherandomness]

Your top 10 c-actors and top 10 c-actresses?

Oooo hm. I'll be honest with you and say that I don't actually watch as much Chinese dramas as people might think haha... It takes a very special premise to pull me in and even then, I usually don't end up liking 70% of whatever is on and abandoning it by the 3rd episode.

That said, I'm going to limit my picks to the top 5 off the top my head in each category. These are actors and actresses who, by virtue of their names being attached to a project, will get me interested in making it to episode 5 and of whom I have watched more than 2 projects that they've been a part of.

Actors

Leo Wu

Our family's Fei Liu 🥰 I know, I know. Didi is the furthest thing from Fei Liu these days, but in my mind, he'll forever be Fei Liu and there's a huge part of me that will always adore him for that. Throughout the years, his projects have been a hit or a miss with me. Either I'll like them or I won't. Which is what I like. I don't want to like everything my faves are part of.

Joseph Zeng

(Look at that happy baby hahaha)

I can't remember which project I first saw him in, or how he even pinged on my radar. But before I knew it, I'd watched three of his dramas and I was about to watch more.

Qin Hao

THIS. DUDE. He's such a powerhouse of an actor and I AM--

He chooses some of the most intense projects and I'm so, so here for them. There's this magnetic quality to the way he acts and every time I get to see him onscreen, I'm absolutely mesmerised. I also have to be honest and say that I haven't had a change to work through his body of work, but I think it's just a matter of time (and mental space) before I do.

Liu Yuning

I believe some moots on this hellsite have had front row seats to my thirsting of this tall, thin, sassy da ge and I won't apologise for any of it. 100//10 would climb him in a heartbeat.

I fell for his voice first before I even knew his face (花开早 天知晓 天莫笑 天亦老~~!!!) and then I saw his face and BAM. Goner. Goodbye ovaries. You might be thinking, oh Gab you're just horny on main for him, to which I will say, yes, yes I am. Isn't that reason enough for me to have gone watch the variety show he was on WITHOUT SUBS. My banana ass went through a lot for this man ok? That's love.

Zhang Linghe

HIM. Saw him in Maiden Holmes. Watched how he acts with his eyes. Okay. Sold. Over the last couple of years, the one drama I really wanted to see him in was the TGCF live action adaptation, which as we all will know, won't be seeing the light of day any time soon. He was actually on my fancast list for Hua Cheng and I was pretty gratified when they announced that he was taking on the role.

He's been doing well for himself and I've liked him the dramas that have caught my eye, and I look forward to what he will bring to the table next. Even if he had been, unfairly in my opinion, saddled with this perception that his dramas have a difficult time getting to air.

Actress

Zhao Liying

Zhao Liying is someone with a face that is so sweet that you'd go into her projects thinking that she's going to portray one type of character then getting body slammed into a spiral of a drama length like The Story of Minglan.

Zhao Lusi

This woman is on track to being the best actress of her generation. Period. You can't fight me on this because you know I'm right.

She's an absolute powerhouse and there's this sense about her that she isn't afraid to get ugly, go roll in the mud and get dirty just to portray a character. I love that about her. There's just this sense of joy to watch her act because she's not just embodying the character, she IS the character. I wouldn't be surprised if her international audience reach is really big because it's what a Queen like her deserves.

Tian Xiwei

Now, she is someone that I never thought I would be into. But I think the dimples should have been a good indication that I was gonna get suckered into her projects and for that, I'm glad. I've only seen bits and bobs of three of her projects, but if the way that I am actually intrigued by the projects she takes on is any clue, I think I'll be sufficiently entertained.

Liu Mintao

Every time I see her, I wanna just be on my knees and call her Mother.

She is absolutely fantastic in every role she takes on. The gentle but steely Consort Jing in Nirvana in Fire? The nurturing and protective Ming Jing in The Disguiser? Check and Check. Love her. I low key think she's a chameleon. Her body of work speaks to the quality of her acting.

Esther Yu

(listen. LISTEN. I HAD TO INCLUDE ONE OF THE HOTTEST KISS SCENES IN CDRAMALAND THAT ISN'T A DEAD FISH LIPS SITUATION OK)

The first time she ever pinged on my radar, it was because of her antics with Lisa from Blackpink during her Produce days. Found her cute and endearing, but that was it. And then came Love Between Fairy and Devil. Without knowing, I fell in love with her charms. She is another actress I think isn't afraid to own being neck deep in the nitty and gritty and not looking perfect. I'm very interested to see what sort of projects she takes on, and judging by her Yun Weishan in My Journey to You, I think there'll be much to anticipate.

[charlenasaxen]

OUABH Fave Quotes pt. 1

“Bells have excellent hearing, but this little chime didn’t need any particular skill”

“the gaudy pocket-watch chain at this young man’s hip”

“Unfortunately, this girl, who believed in hope and fairytales and love at first sight, often misinterpreted”

“the way her voice affected an excited edge as she spoke to the young man”

“The door to the Prince of Hearts’ church has disappeared”

“her mother had been from the Magnificent North, where there was no difference between fairytales and history”

“And, above all, never fall in love with a Fate”

“I know you’re a clever little thing. But you allowed me to find you. Let me in.”

“slightly sweet and metallic: apples and blood”

“Wild locks of golden hair hung across his face as his head bowed”

“depicted the Fate as tragically handsome, with vivid blue eyes crying tears that matched the blood forever staining the corner of his sulky mouth”

“The prince’s marble lips twisted into a perfect smirk”

“there was a hint of softness to his slightly fuller lower lip—it pouted out like a deadly invitation”

“This was what she’d come here for.

She pressed her finger to the tip of the blade. Sharp marble pierced her skin”

“Dear—Prince,” she started haltingly. She’d never prayed”

“I’m here because my parents are dead.”

Evangeline cringed.”

“The lifeless statue hadn’t changed. She knew statues didn’t generally move. Yet she couldn’t help but think that it should have done something.”

“Now, that was a pathetic speech.” Two slow claps followed the indolent voice”

“She didn’t expect to see him—the young man who’d been tearing his clothes”

“he must have ripped away his pain along with the sleeves of his jacket”

“He sat on the dais steps, lazily leaning against one of the pillars with his long, lean legs stretched out”

“His hair was golden and messy, his too-bright blue eyes were bloodshot, and his mouth twitched at the corner”

He looked bored and rich and cruel.

“Would you like me to stand up and turn around so that you can take in the rest of me?” he taunted.

“Dark red juice dripped from the fruit to his long, pale fingers and then onto the pristine marble steps”

“Evangeline imagined the stranger taking her lips”

“You’re staring again,” he purred

lifeless compared to this vicious young man.

“Personally, I think I’m far more handsome.”

“This close, he was undeniably attractive. He gave her a real smile, revealing a pair of dimples.”

“She could picture him flashing those deceptive dimples as he tricked an angel into losing its wings just so he could play with the feathers”

“It’s you,” she whispered. “You’re the Prince of Hearts.”

The Prince of Hearts took a final bite of his apple before it dropped to the floor and spattered everything with red. “People who don’t like me call me Jacks.”

“Evangeline wanted to say that she didn’t dislike him, that he’d always been her favorite Fate. But this was not the lovesick Prince of Hearts she’d imagined.”

“Jacks folded his hands behind his golden head, leaned back against the statue of himself, and grinned”

“not to be deceived by his dimpled smile or the torn clothes. This was the most dangerous being she’d ever met.”

“one of her mother’s old gowns, covered in a stitched pattern of pale purple thistles, tiny yellow flowers, and little foxes”

He waved vaguely toward her curls.

“It’s rose gold,” she answered brightly.

“She missed the way her mother winked and her father teased. She missed everything about them.”

Jacks’s brows slashed down. “You don’t know where you were born?”

“Jacks scratched his sharp jaw, looking doubtful”

“I don’t know if I can fix your broken heart, but you can take mine because it’s already yours.”

“I’ll stop the wedding in exchange for three kisses.” Jacks’s eyes took on an entertained gleam.

“It’s not a real kiss if there isn’t any tongue.”

The blush she’d been fighting burned hotter.

“So, your Luc is a hideous kisser?”

Jacks looked disappointed. “Not even your stepsister?”

“No!”

“victory glimmered in Jacks’s eyes, then he captured her wrist and brought it up to his cold mouth”

“His lips brushed over the delicate underside of her wrist. Once. Twice. Three times. It was barely a touch.”

“think of the other stories that said his kisses might have been fatal, but they were worth dying for”

“Three thin white scars, shaped like tiny broken hearts, lined the underside of her wrist. One for each kiss.”

“laughably sad that Evangeline now had that proof, but she didn’t have him”

“all she could see was the gleam dancing in Jacks’s eyes as he’d taken her wrist”

“Evangeline’s knees went weak.

There had never been statues in this garden before. But there were nine of them now, all holding goblets.”

“Jacks had stopped the wedding by turning everyone to stone”

“It hurt to breathe when Evangeline faced Luc’s statue”

“as stone, his face was frozen in alarm”

“there was the unfortunate marriage minister, who’d picked the wrong union to officiate”

“Jacks flashed both dimples as if he really had done her a favor”

“She saw it as a horror, but Jacks saw it as helpful”

“Heroes don’t get happy endings. They give them to other people. Is that what you really want?”

“Jacks was wrong.

She’d done the right thing.

Someone would save her.”

“Evangeline even thought that Jacks might come to her rescue”

“she knew the Prince of Hearts wasn’t a savior. He was the one people needed saving from.”

“And then … Evangeline felt something that was not heartbreak or regret”

“fight the pull—Jacks will only lead to your destruction.”

“Evangeline was friendly with many from her father’s curiosity shop, and it seemed as if every one of them was there to welcome her back”

“Evangeline was cocooned in hugs and kisses”

“But as soon as Marisol spied Evangeline, her grin widened until it was as bright as the beautiful cake”

“layers of sugarbelle cream, a frosting bow, and an oversize shortbread gift tag that read: Welcome back, sister!”

“He wore a flowing white silk shirt with a lacy jabot that cascaded down to a pair of black leather pants so tight she was surprised he could move”

“It was so exciting! It started right after you were turned to stone.”

“Luc and I decided we’d try to get married again.”

They tried to get married again when she was still stone?”

“largest animals it had were dogs, followed by the feral cats that prowled the docks”

“threw her arms around Evangeline, hugging her the way Evangeline always imagined that real sisters hugged”

“But hope is a difficult thing to kill”

“His third shop was a secret, even from Evangeline”

“She missed the walls her mother had painted, the shelves packed with her father’s finds, the bell—”

“If Jacks had been there”

“She still wanted Luc, but what she really wanted was the life and all the love that she’d lost”

“she wondered if he’d been right when he’d said, If he loved you back, he wouldn’t be marrying someone else”

“caught a hint of its fruit-sweet scent, she’d think of Jacks and the debt she owed, and her heart would race”

“Some tales couldn’t be written down without bursting into flames”

“the young archer who loved her, but was cursed with the need to hunt her down”

“if the archer kissed his fox-girl and they lived happily together forever, or if he killed the fox-girl, ending their story in death”

“It was the feel of candlelight at twilight, paper dust caught in the air”

“expensive red paper accented with whirls of gold leaf and sealed with a red wax symbol”

“But Marisol was still the nearest thing Evangeline had to family”

“a different heir to the throne: a young man nicknamed His Handsomeness”

“the Fates had made their reappearance known to the public by murdering this unlucky royal”

“welcoming her into a garden full of fairy-green trees dripping coral, pink, and peach-colored flowers”

“every type of tea.” The princess waved a hand toward a tiered tower of colorful teapots”

“Evangeline thought it was the most romantic thing she’d ever heard. Secret ballrooms were built for it in forests where fallen stars had once landed”

“there were special kinds of magic that only existed in the North, and not even memories of this magic could pass”

“pet-size dragons that turned to smoke if they tried to fly south”

“No matter how much Evangeline tried not to think about Jacks, he was always tucked away in the back of her thoughts”

“But she was far more uneasy about the three broken heart scars on her wrist that had suddenly started to burn”

“She didn’t seem capable of stealing a book, let alone a boy. But it was hard not to wonder.”

“what if Evangeline found love again in the North and Marisol took it once more?”

“Marisol might have needed it even more. Evangeline couldn’t believe she’d considered not asking her.”

“Evangeline had shared some of her mother’s tales, including her warnings about entering the North”

“Marisol, look, tiny dragons!”

“a tiny pepper-black dragon about the size of a chipmunk shot out streams of red fire to sear a fish stick at a nearby stall”

“the adorable little beasts appeared to be as common as squirrels”

“Evangeline was delighted to spy tiny blue dragons sitting on shoulders”

“make sure her feet were still on the ground and that she hadn’t taken flight, for parts of her were soaring”

“didn’t know how to respond other than insisting on paying the girl twice as much”

“it was a little different, as if it were another one of her mother’s Northern tales”

“she’d liked the idea of convincing this southern stranger that she was a magic water sprite”

“Evangeline couldn’t shake the unnerving idea that it wasn’t other girls she’d need to worry about tonight”

“Fortuna’s Fantastically Flavored Waters”

“white skirt like veins of marbled stone”

“branches stretching, trunks thickening, and leaves turning to real gold. They shone like dragon treasure in the candlelight”

“if one gold leaf was taken before all of them turned, then the entire tree would burst into flames”

“no young men with apples, cruel faces, and torn clothes”

“dressed in an arresting dragon-scale gown the color of burning rubies”

“Don’t worry, it’s not poisoned.” Evangeline took sips from both of her goblets before offering one.

“He was high up in the tree, in a wooded balcony, lounging daringly sideways across the rail”

“There, a painter appeared to be capturing the prince’s dramatic arrangement with fevered brush strokes”

“He always does these poses with his shirt off.”

“It was rather exciting when his younger brother, Tiberius, used to taunt him by shooting arrows, or releasing herds of kittens upon him.”

“she would have bet her life that the Prince of Hearts had just entered the party”

“Don’t turn around.

Don’t turn around.

Don’t—

Evangeline only meant to look for a second.”

“Her eyes went toward the arch first. Jacks was just beyond it.”

“But she was like the tide drawn by the tremendous force of the moon”

“no wonder waves were always crashing; they must have hated the pull as much as she did”

“Jacks was still cutting through the party, all cold-blooded grace”

“same dark color as the fur-lined half cape casually slung over one of his straight shoulders”

“the buttons on his shirt weren’t even all done”

“There are rumors he’s recovering from a great heartbreak.”

“What if Apollo really was her chance at a happily ever after, and she ran away because of a different what-if named Jacks?”

“she’d forgotten about her other threat until she nearly smacked into his solid chest”

“What are you doing here?” He tossed a burnished gold apple with one hand.”

“I’ve never had anyone mauled by a wolf. That’s incredibly messy.”

“she planned to do just that, hopefully with a very different prince from the one standing before her”

“Oh no, Little Fox. We have unfinished business.” Jacks dropped his apple and took her neck”

“the scandalous way Jacks was holding her”

“Jacks, I told you I’d kiss three other people, not you.”

“Then why aren’t you pulling away?” he taunted.

“dragging his fingers up and down over the frantic beat-beat-beat”

“he stalked forward until her thighs met the hard table”

“He leaned in closer. He didn’t touch her, but someone watching from afar might have thought they were on the verge of kissing”

“intentional way he angled his body and canted his head”

“But now that I’ve noticed you, there will be no disappearing.”

“Dark red blood glittered with impossible flecks of gold”

“it was more like a feeling than a flavor, drops of sunshine falling like rain”

“Then he strolled back toward the rest of the party”

“wooden figurines of tiny dragons all displaying names. Jacks’s name had been placed beside hers.”

“part of her was slightly intrigued by the idea—who wouldn’t want to kiss a prince?”

“head tipped back, blue hair tumbling over one eye, and giving the impression he’d been waiting for her”

“I wouldn’t be climbing these stairs with you.” Jacks wrapped the arm she’d just refused around hers.”

“she could feel his skin, cool and rock solid. The contact covered Evangeline’s flesh with tiny unwanted bumps as he brought her closer to his side.”

“There’s no point in having another person commit murder if you’re going to be in the room with them.”

Jacks’s chilling gaze went to her lips. “You do know how to kiss, right?”

“I’m not going to tell you to trust me, because that’s a terrible idea.”

She darted Jacks a panicked look.

“Don’t worry,” he whispered.

“but not as impossibly attractive as Jacks”

“Jacks told you about me?” Evangeline didn’t even try to hide her shock.

“I’m not accustomed to ladies coming up here and asking about other young men.”

“Perhaps he and Jacks were more rivals than friends?”

“Evangeline lifted her eyes, seeking his lips, but somehow her gaze drifted over Apollo’s broad shoulder to Jacks”

“The corner of his lips twitched ever so slightly, and he continued flipping the coin as he silently mouthed”

“Her cheeks heated at the thought that Jacks was watching the embrace”

“destroying the curls Jacks had already mussed”

A cold hand clamped on her shoulder and wrenched her free of the prince’s grasp. “I think it’s time we go.”

Jacks pulled her toward the balcony stairs.

“she was tucked underneath Jacks’s hard arm, pressed close to his cool side”

“Evangeline Fox was seen wrapped in a wicked embrace with one of the prince’s close friends”

“it seems I was right when I called her a risky bet”

“surrounded by fantastic sights, and about to enjoy a dragon-roasted apple”

“I read she kissed one of Prince Apollo’s friends last night—”

“She had been seen in a scandalous position with Jacks”

“Her mother used to say that dragon fire made everything sweeter”

“But first he’d have to catch her, and this evening, she did not plan on being caught by him”

“making her dreams of imported salts come true”

“still sparking with dragon fire. The outside of the apple was the caramelized color of gold.”

“it tasted like hot, searing sweetness and Jacks—”

“A pair of stray speckled blue dragons flew about her hands, and she gave them her treat”

“It had been such a thrill to spy the book”

“Thank you.” Evangeline would have hugged her stepsister, but she didn’t want to wrinkle her.

“a quick waterfall braid, which she decorated with the silken flowers she’d purchased earlier that day”

“her dress was designed to mimic the flower trellis in her mother’s garden”

“nude silk, making her look as if she were wrapped in nothing but the crisscrossing cream-velvet ribbons”

“pastel flowers began to appear, growing denser until every inch of her lower skirts were covered in a brilliant clash of silk violets, jeweled peonies, tulle lilie”

“There were five purple threads poking out. Thick threads that should not have broken easily.

Could Marisol have torn the flower on purpose?”

“The happiness felt touchable, the magic in the air was tasteable”

“she imagined she could have sliced into that night as if it were a cake”

“bride carving shifted so that she looked like whichever girl was about to step through next”

“the air turned spicy with the scent of mulled cider and possibilities”

“she didn’t see any painfully handsome young men”

“played a type of chess where the human pieces kissed one another instead of kicking each other from the board.”

“the slit of her skirt flickered around her exposed leg as if it were aflame”

“You look marvelous!” Evangeline said. “Candles all over the world must be jealous of you tonight.”

“afraid of the kiss or afraid that the girl might change her mind”

“until a pair decides that they’d rather kiss each other than anyone else.”

“Evangeline stole a moment to look about the ball, scanning for a different prince”

“Her eyes darted from gentleman to gentleman, cutting across the bustling ballroom until—Jacks.

Her heart leaped over a beat.”

“He looked like a bad decision some unfortunate person was about to make”

“his sable half cape was rakishly crooked, hanging over one shoulder”

“as if the vision before her might shift and she’d see Jacks conversing with the pink fountain of punch instead”

“Jacks turned his mouth into a tempting twist”

“Of all the young men that her stepsister could have met at Nocte Neverending, why did it have to be Jacks?”

“door labeled Majesty flew open, and Crown Prince Apollo Acadian rode into the ballroom on a thundering golden horse”

“his eyes burned with the same level of intensity they’d had when he’d watched her leave”

she squealed, “You must be his Fox.”

“He’s not trying to re-create the tale. He’s making a romantic gesture!”

“She was tempted to look for the Prince of Hearts again”

“This evening, I only wish to dance with one girl.” His dark eyes finally locked onto Evangeline’s.

“Self-pity doesn’t look good on you, Little Fox.

Evangeline froze.”

“he looked down on her with a smile that was a little shier”

“I’d hoped that after last night, you’d just call me Apollo.” He took her hand to his lips.

“He appeared to be at a loss for words. Nervous. She was making the prince who’d draped himself across a balcony last night nervous.”

“I wouldn’t get through an entire dance before doing this.”

Apollo went down on one knee.

“Evangeline didn’t spy Jacks, but she wondered what he was thinking”

“I want you to be my wife and my princess and my queen. Marry me, Evangeline.”

“it was as if the rest of the celebration didn’t exist. His eyes said a thousand exquisite words.”

“Apollo wanted her more than anyone else in the ballroom.

No one had ever looked at Evangeline like this before.”

if a royal prince were to propose to them in the middle of an enchanted ballroom. “Yes.”

“As soon as Evangeline squeaked out her yes, the trumpeters above released a brassy cheer”

“Apollo gallantly scooped her up into his arms.

His grin was pure joy.”

“Weren’t Fates supposed to be jealous?”

“This was her chance at a happy ending. And when she pushed aside her doubts, Evangeline did feel happy.”

“She’d wished for love at first, and a chance with the prince, and now it was hers”

“His lips were soft, but the kiss was flowers falling”

“shocked sighs from the crowd as he picked her up and spun her around and kissed and kissed and kissed her”

“the sort of kiss fever dreams were made of, a blur of dizzying heat and touch, and this time Jacks didn’t end it”

“All she heard were Apollo’s murmurs promising her everything she could ever want was about to be hers”

“But now, waking up felt like dreaming. A little unreal and a little wonderful.”

“But Valenda was half a world away, and soon she would never be alone again”

“and she was engaged to a prince!”

“Evangeline couldn’t stop the smile that spread across her face or the giggle”

“they’d practically collapsed inside of their carriage and then slept the entire way back to the inn”

“That’s how I feel, as if I missed my chance at a chair and now I’ve been tossed out of the game.”

“slid across her bed, and hugged Marisol tightly”

“Evangeline could already imagine setting up a match for her stepsister with every eligible young man”

“Both girls quickly leaped from the bed, spilling more tea”

“Open it!” Marisol urged her. It’s the prince.

“My heart, you’re safe!” He took her in his arms. His chest was heaving.

“I should never have let you leave last night.”

“What’s wrong?”

“Crown Prince Apollo Acadian proposed to everyone’s favorite southern wild card, Evangeline Fox”

“Prince Apollo and Miss Evangeline Fox are to wed in one week’s time—that is, if no one harms her first”

“But the longer Evangeline looked up at him, the more he seemed to soften”

“Then I’ll make sure it’s done. But I need a favor from you.” Apollo cupped Evangeline’s cheek.

“I want you to move into Wolf Hall with me, where you’ll be safe from any type of threat.”

“every romantic courtyard, and every secret passage of the castle as a wedding gift to his bride”

“it has been confirmed that Miss Tourmaline will remain here as part of the Northern royal court after the wedding”

“The following day, the wedding dress arrived. Evangeline found it spread across her princess bed.”

“Forever your truest love,

Apollo”

“My dearest Evangeline,

You deserve to be bathed in jewels.”

“Then it was an entire stable of horses. The steeds were gleaming white and adorned with rose-gold saddles.”

“So that we can ride off into the sunset together,” Apollo said. His eyes were full of adoration.

“Her fingers felt small in his warm grip, but they were starting to fit”

“I’d give you the world if I could. The moon, the stars, and all the suns in the universe. Anything for you, my heart.”

“It was all more than Evangeline could have dreamed of or wished for. The last few days had been a whirlwind of wonderful.”

“Her royal suite was covered in colorful gowns and flowers and gifts. Even Empress Scarlett had sent her something.”

“Something was not as it should have been”

“Evangeline Fox and Prince Apollo Acadian have been engaged less than one week, and already people are writing songs about them and saying that theirs is the greatest love story the Magnificent North has ever seen”

“tattoo of a pair of swords curved to form a heart that contained one name: Evangeline”

“the crown prince has been completely bewitched by his bride-to-be. I’ve never seen anyone as in love as Prince Apollo.”

“sadly, she feared that Kristof was right when he called her betrothed bewitched”

“Like the work of a spell or a curse—or a Fate.

Like Jacks.”

“She didn’t want to go back to Agnes’s house or return to Valenda, where the best part of her day was when a bell rang”

“Dear Jacks,

I was hoping you and I might have a chance to speak about an important matter”

“I don’t have time to tromp through the woods with you”

“before sneaking out to meet Jacks”

“Jacks looked like a debauched stable boy”

“He lounged across one side of the carriage, one scuffed leather boot propped carelessly up”

“him in a linen shirt with rolled-up sleeves and half-done buttons. Evangeline caught a hint of a rough scar on his chest.”

“Do you stare at everyone like that, or just me?” Jacks looked up. Vivid blue eyes met hers.

“It shouldn’t have made her blood rush”

“What’s the matter?” Slice. “Has he hurt you?”

Jacks’s sullen mouth settled somewhere between a frown and a laugh. “When you first came to my church, you’d lost your love. Now I’ve given you a new one.”

Jacks’s eyes met hers, returning to ice. “Leave, Little Fox. Go back to your prince and your happily ever after, and don’t ask me that question again.”

“everything she’d thought was stardust was really just the burning embers of a wicked spell. Apollo didn’t love her.”

“Wrong and right are so subjective.” Jacks sighed.

“She wanted to be someone’s love, not their curse”

Jacks smirked. “You’re not going to break an engagement with a prince.”

“Jacks clenched his jaw.

She smiled, triumphant.”

“Evangeline clutched the cushions to keep from falling forward into Jacks’s lap”

“And she was engaged, at least for now.

Jacks’s blue eyes twinkled as if he found her worry amusing.”

“Do that, and you’ll be the one destroying him, not me.”

“as if the idea of leaving someone forever brokenhearted put him in a better mood”

“except maybe heartless or depraved or rotten”

“The apple in his hand probably possessed more sympathy than he did”

“This was not the same young man who’d practically bled heartbreak”

“Are you feeling sorry for me?” Jacks laughed, harsh

“Jacks shot across the carriage and pressed the bloody tip of the dagger to the center of her mouth”

“Evangeline might have gasped if she’d not feared he’d slip the blade between her lips”

“His blue eyes were back to bright as he taunted her with the blade, pressing it to her”

“So, I will give you a wedding gift. I promise to restore the prince after you marry him.”

“The only person who’d truly win would be Jacks.

Cautiously, she leaned back until Jacks’s knife was no longer at her lips.”

“She felt as if she’d taste it forever”

“I don’t think you and I have the same definition of hurt.”

“Be thankful for that, Little Fox.”

A drop of blood fell from the corner of his mouth, and something godforsaken washed over his expression. “Hurt is what made me.”

“But she immediately thought the words storybook castle as she stepped out of Jacks’s carriage”

“sparkling purple bricks, gabled blue roofs, and pink-lined windows with golden light blazing through”

“Jacks glared at the castle, eyes like daggers, as he started down the cobbled path”

“Little Fox.” Jacks brought a cool finger to her mouth, quieting her protests with more gentleness.

“Let’s skip the part where we argue.”

“Everyone is replaceable.” He stroked her lower lip.

“But she also couldn’t forget the way Jacks had walked away when she’d turned to stone”

“they’d stop whispering about how mysterious you are and talk about how much they can’t stand you.”

Jacks speared her with a sideways glance. “Meanness doesn’t suit you, Little Fox.”

“Jacks’s lips curved like a crescent blade”

“She could have continued fighting with Jacks until the end of Time. Luckily for Time”

“Jacks took the cherub’s ring and gave it two quick raps.

Evangeline swore the knocker frowned, and she understood how it felt.”

“a fluffy snow cat pounced after a merry blue dragon laughing sparks”

“watched her with shameless intent”

“Jacks sighed, dramatic as his pose”

“People who lived in sparkly purple castles didn’t threaten to feed guests to their dogs”

“Evangeline was actually thankful for Jacks’s magic”

“Jacks laughed and covered it up with a cough”

“Jacks shoved off from the fireplace and sauntered to Evangeline’s side with insouciant grace”

“Evangeline hugged her arms to her chest”

“they didn’t hide his eyes. They were wide, broken star-bright, and full of something that looked a lot like hope”

“Evangeline felt as if she shouldn’t stare so blatantly, but she couldn’t turn away. The look in his eyes had softened some of his sharp edges”

“all tragically handsome and heartsick”

“Jacks cocked his head, surprised”

“If you wouldn’t mind, young man.”

“another rasping whisper came from the stones: You could have unlocked me as well”

“surprised and unnerved to see that Jacks was watching her instead”

“What is it, Little Fox?” His voice was friendly.

“she was not about to let Jacks know they had been talking to her”

“didn’t spare them more than a cursory glance. Not that she thought he was after a recipe book.”

“She continued to scrutinize his every move”

“The Prince of Hearts’ mouth became more sullen”

“the matriarch pointed Evangeline toward a shelf of ancient dragon eggs”

“Not having fun?” Evangeline needled.

“I feel as if I’m backstage at a bad magic show,” Jacks grumbled.

“Let me help you,” Evangeline whispered, hoping to finally coax an answer

“Coward,” she coughed.

[hebescus]

for the character headcanon thing: light yagami pls🥺👀

send me a character!

oh hi!! alright let's go

1. sexuality headcanon

i mean, he's gay, i think we all on the same page on that one and he's also greyromantic. seriously, the amount of discussion i had with myself to come up with this hc for him,,,,

2. otp

mr. big feet and chicken dance boy my beloved 🥰

3. brotp

Him and Ryuk, duh! Besties forever! Love their dynamic so much, I forgot how entertaining it was watching them together for the first time. i mean, come on, who's going to feed ryuk apples and entertains him the way light did? no one, and ryuk is something too for light, more than a shinigami who hold his life in his pen.

4. notp

light and kiyomi...i just don't like it. she has more chemistry with misa, halle, even mikami than with light. i don't even like them as friends, their vibes just clash imo

5. first headcanon that pops into my head

i've been thinking about this for days, so he has dimples, but it's not that deep so you can only see it when he smile widely or laughing. Both L and sayu likes to poke it to annoy him. sometimes when he's alone he smile to the mirror just to see it. god, someone please draw him with dimples he'd look even more gorgeous.

6. favorite line from this character

tbh the whole kira speech but especially this part.

7. one way in which I relate to this character

see up there? yeah, "someone had to do it" complex, happens too many times.

8. thing that gives me second hand embarrassment about this character

when he smile at near and said "i win" like no you're not,,,why did you say that. also another that is more of a mix feeling bc my anxious ass got second hand embarassment at the same i really do find it tragic and fascinating, that is when he became so frantic he started to call out for misa and takada...god it was something.

9. cinnamon roll or problematic fave?

problematic cinnamon roll!! my fav murderboy.

thank you bestie <3

[potterology]

fave dylb scenes bc I can't get over and I’m already rewatching and noticing little things heheee 

- first meeting outside the restaurant. ohh how I love how awkward yet endearing they both were when they finally introduced themselves to one another. rewatching it made me realize that JY was already smitten by SA since the start. (like literally since the start y'all!!! he didn't even know her yet and wanted to stop the car to get SA an umbrella and this was in the first ep!!)

- when JY switched coffee cups with SA bc she spilt her cup and he started drinking it so she can’t refuse even though he doesn’t like coffee. Like he just did it bc he was compelled to do so?? like dude what if she already drank from it??? This scene was so funny to me and I love it cuz I dont think SA is used to being the one taken care of like that so it was just v cute

- when the noona was trying to get them to talk banmal but SA was like oh noooo he’s a superstar. This was cute bc you can actually see that JY was disappointed. Also they keep sneaking peeks at each other lol cute fools 

- waiting for taxi scene- this was so freaking adorable. shows how considerate they both are for each other and it’s so freaking awkward when they both realized they were standing there waiting for each other to get a taxi- but like in the cutest way

- when they were both outside that restaurant and SA asked if JY enjoyed his performance at granny’s house and I think this was the first time someone asked our boy if he likes what he does for a living and you can just tell his heart went soft for her(same dude same)

- spontaneous non-date date. ohh I love the first time they ate together at that beer place. they really started to get to know each other there. the mood and how that scene was filmed was just chef’s kiss~~

- rehearsal room we should be friends scene. when homeboy transitioned from moonlight sonata to happy birthday, y'all knew it was over for SA- god damn I would have swoon over too

- by the river “I wanted to see you” scene- high key JY sucks at communicating but I love how he is just so taken by SA that he just flat out says he misses her and as soon as he says it he was almost shocked himself. so pure

- the midnight call. I MEAN. guys. guys. he wanted to just talk to her and ask her out but tried to be nonchalant about it. ahhh they literally portrayed the first stages of dating so well I'm goo for it !!!!!!

- first walk together in the walkway. this was just so adorable. the almost hand holding. the chemistry!! the shy smiles :’’’) 

- SA’s birthday when she thanked JY for just being there for her. I love how she quietly acknowledges him and it was such an intimate interaction between them. I replay that scene a lot in my head

- when he ran to SA to give her his signed CD. He was so worried about her he forgot about JK lmaooo. Also the fact the he validated her as a violinist when SA was at a very low point... I mean... boyfriend material ugh

- the scene when SA told JY every little thing he does concerns her and that she didn’t want to feel that way about him anymore. As soon as SA said that homeboy PANICKED!!! I don’t even think he knew how much he liked SA until she said that :’)

- the lunchroom scenes 1) when they were teasing each other and 2) when JY announced that they were dating lolol I love how stoic he normally is but for SA he becomes a softie hehe

-ice cream day date; lol when SA won’t let JY tie her shoelaces bc she didn’t want to fall for him lol ok girl

-night ice cream/ stairs date. y'all know already. shit was just adorable. SA going for the kiss. I melted with the ice cream

- when JY asked SA for her handkerchief!!! it’s such a small gesture but they both knew it had a special meaning and I love how it put SA over the moon. (Also let’s include all the other times we see JY actually use that handkerchief- especially after they broke up. like homeboy was holding on to it for his dear life bc it was the only thing he had of SA~~ my fragile heart!!) ps did we ever see SA get a handkerchief from him???? No??? Sbs give me that pls

- when MS was telling JY in the car that SA has only openly confessed liking two things in her life and one them was JY. He was so flustered and couldn’t hide his smile and dimples... bruhhhhh he was full on swoon. Also when JY heard SA say that she really likes JY like he was so proud of himself lmao he’s like “yeah my gf LIKES ME” lolol

- when the lovebirds fought who was gonna clean up the broken glass at JY apartment. I love loveee this one bc SA has been beaten down so much by everyone calling her talentless that she didn’t even consider how important her hands is to her as a musician. And JY being like honey ur a violist and a musician too- UR HANDS ARE PRECIOUS. This was just v touching. Again showing how JY has always considered SA as an equal despite all the shit people say about his gf. luv him :’)

-all the moments JY just stood by SA’s side and held her hand when she needed comfort. I love how he’s just there for her. His silent support was just enough. (One thing that would have been nice is if we saw SA do the same thing, I felt like the writers were almost there but just didn't go all the way which is a shame tbh)

- Their lil day trip to JY’s hometown. I like how JY was so open to SA here. When he proclaimed that he never felt “this way before”  I screamed!! It was at that moment you clearly knew as a viewer that JY never really loved JK. He might have he loved the idea of her, yes. But he never truly loved her the way he loves SA. And his realization of this in that particular episode just made me so so so happy

- Handholding in the bus scene. That shit was so freaking tender bc you can tell how content JY was. He was beyond smitten- homeboy was IN LOVE AT THIS POINT

- when JY dropped SA home. I mean everything about this scene really makes ur heart soft right?? How both of them were beaming? How SA feet probably hurt bc homegirl was wearing heels the whole day and walked another 30 min just so she can spend more time with JY? How she literally ran back to him and JY just had this impression watching her like “my gf is cute af”?? How SA said something along the lines of JY having somewhere to belong to now and you can tell this had a double meaning for him bc at this point he prob considered SA as his home..I was literally mush oh my god. 

-break up scene. I know, v painful- but this was a rare one in kdramaland where I actually thought it was necessary for them to split (still wish it was done earlier but alas I'll take it) It was a graceful and needed breakup. Also when JY pulled out that umbrella for her.... bish it was over for me

- SA’s recital. I MEAN HOW IN SYNC COULD THEY BE. I normally skip the musical performances whenever I watch dramas that are music related- but this show makes it so magical I simply could not. PEAAAKKK ROMANCE

- JY’s recital- when he played that last song I was a big mess cuz we all knew it was dedicated for SA :’’) (I listen to this piece all the time now and im so emo when I hear it bc like god WHEN)

- First I love you scene. JY just going for it and chasing his happiness without caring if SA might reject him. We love to see it

-Second I love you scene. YALL. YALLLLL the way JY just releases his breathe when SA said she can't be friends bc she loves him more than a friend will forever slay me. Kim min jae’s acting here was real good. I love how JY said I love you four times and just went for it. top kissing scene in a krdrama for me hehee 

- dubokki date. lmao at JY with the spicy level. just plain cute

-the quick side by side peek to JY new album in the last episode. the way it showed how their relationship evolved. how he signed it as “for my love song ah” BISH I WANNA DATE A MUSICIAN TOO NOW

- that lil scene where JY wrote SA’s name as the planner bc he knows she works just as hard as the musicians and deserves the recognition. get u a boy who will vandalize a program notice for u :)

- basically all the scenes at the end of ep 16. I wish all of them were longer. I wanted to see more of them dating and happy!!! But I just love how they are both so INTO each other and you can see how happy JY is bc he finally has that person back that understood him since the beginning and it makes you feel so warm knowing they’re each other’s support system ahhhh I love their love !!

- also just all the scenes that JY looks at SA lovingly ~~ which literally happened since ep 1 I mean they are literally heart eyes emoji for each other every time :’)) 

- oh oh OH special shout out to ep 11 when JY just can’t stop holding SA’s hands !! the way he does it is so freaking INTIMATE like if I can only describe how I feel whenever I see compilation gifs of that episode where JY just reaches out and holds SA’s hands so steadily and tightly...it’s literally the most heartwarming thing.. idek how to explain what I’m trying to convey but I just vibe with it so much?? it’s so intimate and romantic.. Kim min jae I will die 4 u my love

[threephasebird]

Hello friend, it's Nicole from TAD discord, so sorry for awkwardly & randomly sliding into your dms. I've noticed that you've been reblogging a lot of The Untamed recently and I have just finished The Untamed & literally cannot think about anything else. I'm obsessed. Anyway, I've also noticed from your blog that your favorite seems to be JGY and I find that *fascinating*. He's very much not my fav, but he's such a complex character that I would love to hear your thoughts & feelings & analysis?

And to be completely clear, I will never try to debate with you or say your opinions are wrong or immoral or anything. I'm not an anti, I've stanned plenty of villains in my time. I'm just genuinely curious. I think the fact that you have such different feelings about this character is part of the beauty of stories and a testament to how complex and smart this particular story is.

Hello friend! First of all, thank you for your ask -- I love talking about my fictional faves, so there’s no need to apologize at all! There are definitely people out there who have already posted much more cohesive and succinct character analysis for JGY, but I’ve sat down for a bit to find an answer to the question of why I, personally, like him so much. I ended up finding six possible ways to answer this question, which I’ll list below and then go into (a lot) more detail under the cut. Hope you enjoy!

1) I like him because his motivations as a villain are complex and understandable

2) I like him because there’s no easy solution to his conflicts

3) I like him because he interacts with the story in a unique way

4) I like him because when we see him on top of his game, it’s fun to watch

5) I like him because LXC likes him

6) JGY is very small and has dimples

So, onward! (2.7k)

1) I like him because his motivations as a villain are complex and understandable

One possible way of looking at JGY is that throughout the entire story, his end goal is to eliminate all of the Jin family and come out on top as sect leader, chief cultivator and most powerful person in the cultivation world. However, I personally find it more intriguing to think that his specific plans shifted throughout the story and that he didn’t follow a long con the way NHS did, but that the common ground in everything he does is that he’s motivated by wanting security. Then, everything that he does afterwards is a step-by-step escalation when no matter what he does and how far he comes, his goal is always dangled right in front of him, but ultimately impossible to reach.

When he joins the Nie clan, on a superficial level it seems that this place could offer him the security he wants and needs, especially with NMJ protecting him -- but on the flip side of the coin, no one apart from NMJ and NHS seem to respect him, and his security entirely depends on NMJ’s goodwill. It’s an exteremely fragile position that could probably only ever last for a limited amount of time. Even if JGY never killed the guard captain and wasn’t thrown out of the Unclean Realm, how would the future have looked like for him? NMJ’s life expectancy was low to begin with, and once he had died (of natural causes, in this hypothetical case), NHS wouldn’t have been able to hold the same protective hand over JGY as his brother, and JGY would have become the disrespected advisor to the disrespected clan leader. (On a side note, I personally don’t think JGY released XY to get the yin iron -- I think it makes more sense that he wanted to use XY as bargaining chips against WC, seeing how he goes to free him immediately after WC asks for NMJ to release XY, to save the Unclean Realm and, in extension, his own ass.)

After JGY is thrown out, he’s basically out of options -- it’s go big or go home, because which other clan would take him in now? So he sets his sight on being recognized by JGS once more, and in order to succeed, he derives the plan of becoming a spy under WRH and do something so “heroical” that after the war, JGS has no other choice but to accept him into his clan. And at first, it seems like he succeeds and that he finally gets everything he wished for -- his father recognizes him as a son and gives him a position, he’s part of the Jin clan, he has power, he’s secure! But then it turns out that he was wishing on the monkey’s paw. His father doesn’t truly recognize him, and even in the Jin clan he’s disrespected (by JGS, by Madam Jin, by Jin Zixun), he doesn’t truly hold power (he just has to do whatever JGS tells him to), and he’s not secure (JGS instrumentalizes him because he’s useful to him right now, but does that mean he’ll be useful forever? So there’s a constant threat there).

I think the only reason JGS officially adopts JGY is that it allows him to claim the victory over WRH for the Jin clan and to expand his own power. Instead of JGY being recognized, JGS instrumentalizes him from the very first second and to make it worse, he makes JGY his attack dog the same way WRH did. I think the things JGY does under both WRH and JGS are absolutely horrifying, but I can’t help but also feel horrified for him. Under WRH, I think he tells himself that whatever he does is the lesser evil because it’ll end the war quicker, and that it’ll all be worth it in the end, and as a result, he loses parts of his own humanity there. And then under JGS, it’s the same fucked up shit again, except that this time, he also wants so very badly for JGS to value him, and in addition, he’s also completely out of options now. Without wanting to excuse the things he does under JGS, the only alternative at this point is for him to leave the Jin clan and the cultivation world as a whole, and I do think there’s a definite possibility that JGS would have him killed if he did because he knew too much about JGS’s plans.

Without passing judgment on his involvement in JZX and JZX’s deaths, as well as him killing NMJ and JGS for now (the latter being the one thing that I’m personally most horrified of), I don’t see JGY as a villain who enjoys being the villain the way XY does. I think he’s constantly horrified at himself and compartmentalizes to a degree where he’s actually derailing his own plans. Him throwing out XY immediately after killing JGS reads to me as him wanting to close the chapter of everything they did under JGS -- I think he must have acted out of a visceral emotion there or else he wouldn’t have left XY to die at the side of a road so carelessly (and, in effect, allowed for someone to live on with detailed knowledge of his own deeds). After rising to power (and finally, seemingly, really getting the security he’s always wanted), he doesn’t use that power to become WRH 3.0, but instead to do genuinely good things (such as building the watch towers). That’s not supposed to mean that him not being a cruel despot makes up for everything he’s done, but I find it interesting to think about from the perspective of, what kind of person could he have been if this opportunity had been given to him freely -- if his own class and social standing didn’t prevent him from that? I think he’d have become an incredibly powerful cultivator and clan leader if he’d have the same privilege as JZX.

In a way, I see JZX, WC, and JGY as narrative foils. WC shows us who JZX might have become if JGS treated him the same way as WRH treats WC. But, JGS doesn’t -- he shields his own son from this part of the Jin clan, and basically allows him to live in a completely different reality as JGY! JZX’s whole character arc is one of personality development, and becoming a hero, and falling in love -- he doesn’t have a clue about his father wanting to get his hands on XY and the Stygian tiger amulet and arguably about at least part of the war crimes he commits against the Wen clan. It’s not part of his life. In a way, JGY is the sacrifice being made to allow him to live his life unaware because in him, JGS found someone else to do his dirty work.

2) I like him because there’s no easy solution to his conflicts

Sometimes, when you want to be a villain apologist, all you need to do is point at one or a few bits of the story and say, “well if they hadn’t done that...”. (See, for example, Anakin Skywalker -- you wanna write a RotS canon divergence fixit? Just have Obi-Wan come back approximately one hour earlier and you have it, because before Anakin kills the Jedi even the Younglings he’s basically completely redeemable.) With JGY, you don’t get to have that. There’s no single turning point where you could say, “if he had picked the other option, he could have had a happy ending”. And part of the reason for that, which makes him a tragic character in my eyes, is that he crucially lacks options at many turning points.

In order to write a canon divergence AU for JGY where he comes out unscathed and redeemable, you’d have to go pretty far back in the story, and even then, you’d have to work hard to find a solution to his story that doesn’t a) rely on someone saving him (such as: LXC brings him to Cloud Recesses, or: JGS has a change of heart, frees his mother, and sends them a comfortable monthly pension), b) having him be dependent on someone else’s goodwill (such as: staying in the Unclean Realm in a delicate position).

If we don’t want to go back right to the very beginning or change fundamental parts of the story, well... As I’ve mused about above, if we let him stay in the Unclean Realm, he’d have never reached his goal of security either. If he never became a spy during the Sunshot Campaign, he wouldn’t have been accepted into the Jin clan and would have been out of options. If he never committed the atrocities for JGS, JGS would probably have kicked him out or killed him. (I do think there’s a lot of truth in what JGY tells NMJ in the empathy flashback, on that instance.) If he didn’t kill NMJ, there is a distinct possibility that NMJ would have killed him -- we see him try three times on screen, after all. (I’m leaving out the parts about him being directly responsible for JZX’s and JZX’s death in the show, as well as for controlling the corpses at Nighless City and JYL’s death, because it’s not in the book and I think it takes away from WWX’s character. As for QS’s and their son’s deaths...I personally do not see strong motivation for him to kill them, but in the end, we just don’t know which is, on a side note, a thing I really like about The Untamed/MDZS! Sometimes we just don’t know because the only people who know for sure can’t tell us anymore.) One option could be for him to confide to JZX, bring him over to his own side, and non-violently overthrow JGS, which would be a good and satisfying ending both to his and JZX’s character arcs -- but I also think there’s a high possibility JZX would hold JGY responsible for what he and JGS did, and never trust him with power again.

(Again, one thing I really do not wish to excuse away is how he killed JGS, and I just. Desperately wished he didn’t.)

I’ve been going over and over the possibilites for fix-its and canon divergence AUs, but in the end, I’ve arrived at the conclusion that the only real choice JGY has throughout the story is whether to remove himself from the narrative or stay in it. He could make the choice to give up his mother’s dream, reject his father, and leave cultivation world (and, on a meta level, the story!) to become a “nobody”. (Small side note, though -- living on which skills?) If he doesn’t -- well, as soon as he enters the game, the cards are stacked against him.

To pick up on the meta level comment, I do find it fascinating that in a sense, JGY not only has to struggle for respect and recognition within the story, but that what he does also serves to keep his character part of the story. He could choose to give up and leave (and thus come out of the story redeemable), but then he wouldn’t be part of the story anymore.

3) I like him because he interacts with the story in a unique way

Continuing with the last point, JGY interacts with the story in two unique ways that distinguish him basically from all the other characters. He’s not actually supposed to be part of the story, but that he basically claws his way in. But that also means that his class and social status cannot be removed from any of the conflicts he encounters in universe -- they’re at the heart of all of them. In the empathy flashback, he says to NMJ, “You always scold me for indecent scheming. You always say that you are just and straight [...] A decent man shouldn’t resort to devious stratagems. [...] You’re of noble birth and have profound cultivation. What about me? How can I be the same? First, I don’t have the foundation of cultivation. No one has ever taught me that since I was a child! Second, I don’t have any background. Do you think that my position is very solid in the Jin clan of Lanling?” What I find so intriguing about this scene is that he’s right when he says he’s different from the others both in text and on a meta level because most of the other characters are never faced with the same decisions and have a natural place within the story (apart, to some degree, WWX and XY, where also interesting parallels can be drawn). And the other characters are, in a way, self-righteous to judge him when almost none of them come out of the story without blood on their hands -- WWX’s revenge, JC torturing demonic cultivators after WWX’s death, and so on...The entire cultivation world (even NMJ! even LXC!) were complicit in the war crimes against the Wen. But when the cultivation world turns against JGY, they are the most appalled by the things I as a viewer would be the most lenient towards (murdering JGS), and don’t care at all about the thing that horrifies me the most (murdering the sex workers).

There’s an interesting post by @pumpkinpaix​ analysing how class dynamics work in the story, which I highly recommend! I don’t want to repeat what has been said there already in much better ways than I can, but among other things, it makes some really interesting points about how much JGY’s class is tied with his motivations.

4) I like him because when we see him on top of his game, it’s fun to watch

Aside from any analysis, part of the reason why I like him so much is that when he’s acting as a villain, he’s just so much fun to watch. When WWX breaks into his vault in paperman form and JGY has approximately 5 minutes to get rid of the head, the torture bench (?) and anything suspicious, contact and inform Su She, run to a different building and come back, and nonetheless he manages to convince everyone but WWX and LWJ that he’s the victim in this situation, it’s just. Peak entertainment? For a short time, he’s on top of the game, and then he’s backed into a corner and becomes sloppy, and finally loses it all due to sentimentality (if he didn’t want to take his mother’s body with him and say goodbye to LXC, I’m sure he could have fled the country). I think Zhu Zanjin did an amazing job as an actor to portray how JGY is constantly assessing everything, how 23638 emotions flicker over his face in half a second, how his whole body language shows the constant anxiety and pressure and stress and fear he’s under, and how we actually get to see in his microexpressions when JGY chooses a path and commits to the acting and emotional manipulation to follow it through.

5) I like him because LXC likes him 

Here’s a secret: Actually, LXC is my favourite character. And LXC loves JGY a lot. So I’m kind of contractually obliged to at least love JGY a little bit as well?

On a more serious note, I’m very intrigued in their relationship because I do think what they had was genuine. I view it as two people being very open and honest and true with each other, while placing a lot of things outside the brackets and crossing them out. LXC even says that he was aware of some things JGY did (which ones? how? I need to know) but that he justified them to himself. I think they both realised that they could have had something very special, but under the given circumstances, LXC wouldn’t have been able to help JGY (see: point 2) even if he knew everything. Still, they were obviously very close and trusted each other as much as they could. I think in the end, when LXC seemed to have decided to stay and die with him, JGY pushed him away because he was the only genuinely good part of his life, and he felt like he couldn’t rightfully deprive the world of LXC. It’s all very tragic, and I’m very intrigued to explore what they could have been in a slightly softer world.

6) JGY is very small and has dimples

I can only speak for myself, but when I was watching, I was so prone at any point to believe in him no matter what was revealed. Look at him! Could this man do something wrong?

[paradife-loft]

Tagged by @leatherbookmark​ like a week ago, look I’m trying, thank you! :D

Top 3 Ships: The Untamed-edition bc I am currently 1 thought / head empty full of dimples, and it’s been about eighty billion years since I last interacted with other media in a remotely ship-centric way.

Lan Xichen/Jin Guangyao -- Free space??? free space in the middle of the bingo card anyone? But really, where do I even begin here. The contrast between violence and ruthlessness, degradation, being trapped, being every bad thing you could possibly be capable of; and on the other hand, the one person who has never thought poorly of you, who is kind and good and gracious and smart and powerful and of the most lofty status - and who loves you unreservedly, as his equal. Finding someone astoundingly clever and capable and charming where you’d barely expected it, who makes you smile and laugh and has seen you at your most vulnerable and still deeply cares for you, the whole person with weaknesses and well-disguised rough edges, not just the sect leader and superlative title. Generic social ritual metamorphosed into a dialogue of mutual affection! The interposition of politics and status and calculated language with blistering UST!!! And of course - the final scene. One last test, of a despised, shattered man, scared that the one person he esteemed above every other has finally turned on him too - who is answered, no, despite it all I still love you - and so makes his last act in life to save that person, yet again. God. Kill me ;A;

Wei Wuxian/Lan Wangji -- Like, really, why would we be here otherwise? But. Most particularly with these two, I am all about the “showing in myriad tiny (and less tiny) ways over the course of months/years that you, damaged and sad and always trying to hide it, are going to be loved and cared for with the utmost devotion because your utter lack of belief in your self-worth and deservingness of love is wrong” dynamic. Look. I am what I am. (Other Top Faves: WWX gradually becoming oh so loving and fond toward all the Peak LWJ Traits that he scoffed at and made fun of as a dumbass teenager. The way they learn to accommodate and adjust for each other’s preferred interaction styles. The scorching flirting and teasing. The fact that these are, ultimately, adults who put in work and effort to become who they are to each other, and the comforting wonderful ease of their interactions toward the end of the show didn’t ~just happen~ and isn’t immune to future road bumps and potholes, but they both care enough to work it out.)

Wei Wuxian?Wen Ning -- The ? is my new explicit “fuck the sexualromantic/platonic binary, it’s MY single-plank bridge and I WILL be a nuisance to your tagging system” ship-dynamic-indicating symbol. Because yeah -- I am, like, Very Happy with this ship regardless of whether they’re ever fucking or not in a given iteration of the fic/headcanon possibilities multiverse (although, uhhh, I am Biased toward a certain amount of erotic longing for a couple of Peak Weird Gremlin reasons). ANYWAY. It’s about the “doing whatever you can to save someone, even if it transforms them in ways that are kind of horrifying and that eventually you regret and hate yourself for actually; but meanwhile they do not hold anything against you for it whatsoever (and you feel even more guilty because of it)!” crunchiness! It’s about the “you were the first person outside my immediate family to make a point of dramatically respecting and caring about me and I will now have HEART EYES FOREVER” dynamic (which is apparently a recurring theme for me lmao). The fact that Wen Ning consistently goes out of his way to help Wei Wuxian even without/before being asked, because this is perhaps one of the only relationships he’s had where he gets the opportunity to be the one doing things for someone else instead of just being the object who’s taken care of - almost like a way of asserting his personhood, by setting them/himself into the social roles of reciprocal favors and patronage, that I don’t think he otherwise has access to. God, they are just. So Good.

(And, ofc, postscript for Important Personal Context bc being perceived is a terrifying minefield: in my own interpretation and story-making universe, all of these relationships are aro-inflected rather than romantic. All of them. Because in the drama at least, everything is delightfully unnamed via modern relationship terms and stands on the basis of the portrayed interaction alone, and that’s honestly a fair good bit of why I like those portrayals so much. I’m aro, I like to identify with media, and I do what I want ¯\_(ツ)_/¯)

Last Song: “Mother” by IDLES

Last Movie: lol, a good question. I really really don’t watch that many movies. possibly Parasite? was it that long ago? *stares off into the distance*

...oh lmao what am I even talking about, it was Fatal Journey! I clearly am defining “movie” differently in my internal categorisation system than objective reality does. thanks a lot, brain.

Currently Reading: ......way too much fanfiction and not much else. as I believe I mentioned at one point to someone recently, actually acquiring the books I’d been intending to read at the beginning of this year would involve far too much interaction with the real world and general passage of time for my current delicately-balanced emotional fragility to handle. I’m... not really happy about this state of affairs :<

Food I’m Craving: my ability to crave food to return from the war, tbh :/

(aaaand obligatory disclaimer of “I’m bad at tags but pls steal and fill out if you want to! aha :’D)

[andrebearakovsky]

Top Chandler Stephenson Moments

His play was up and down over the years, but I actually really liked Chandler, especially at the beginning. But I could kind of see this coming. So I’m going to put together a little bit of a tribute of sorts recapping what I consider his best moments, because I am going to miss him.

And I of course cannot include everything he’s done and every piece of media he’s been in over the years, but I will do my best to include the better moments.

16. His participation in various Caps holiday videos

Capitals Tunes Vol. 2 (2017), Capitals Tunes Remix (2018), The 12 Days of Capsmas (2018)

15. When Kuzy descended upon him in this hug

Gif credit @faceoffs​

14. This very sweet video about him growing up in Saskatchewan (feat. his hot mom)

13. When everyone else said they wanted to win the Cup again but he said he wanted to skydive

12. When he looked hot getting ready for Nathan Walker’s wedding

Look, let’s be real. The number one thing we’re all going to remember Chandler for is being smoking hot. We were incredibly blessed by Nathan Walker inviting him to be in his wedding party and then capturing video of him getting ready while shirtless.

11. When his rock paper scissors win made Nicky cuss

10. When he beat Nicky at darts

Frankly I’m surprised that the Stephensons survived after beating the Backstroms at darts.

9. When the group celly just didn’t work out

Gif credit @welshhockeyfan​​

8. When he went to the HRC National Dinner

7. When his drawing skills were…questionable

Can he draw Nicky? No. Can he draw the Weagle? Also no.

6. When he played an eventful game of “Name That Capital” with Nicky

5. When he took a second job as Tom’s delivery boy

4. When he took the Cup to Humboldt

3. When his hustle and great pass beat out an icing and led to an amazing goal by DSP in Game 6 of the ECF

He didn’t score it, but this will be the goal I remember him for the most. Just a fantastic play all around, absolutely electric.

2. When Ovi held him in a death grip in the dying minutes of the Cup-winning game

Gif credit @goalofsson​

Quite possibly the image of him I will remember forever: the dying minutes of Game 5 of the Stanley Cup Final. Ovi has his arm around Nicky to hold Chandler in a death grip (and he will definitely, for sure die if he attempts to move), and then subsequently becomes a third wheel to 819 while caught in said death grip

1. My own personal memory of him

I don’t know if I’ve ever told this story on here, but now is as good a time as any to tell, and this will be by far my most lasting memory of Chandler Stephenson.

This happened well over a year ago; my friend and I were at the Caps practice facility, and we were sitting in the bleachers. Practice was winding down, and when everyone left, the ice we began our trek out of the bleachers and were headed for the shop or something. We passed some dude wearing a hoodie, we went around him without much notice. Then when we had gotten down from the bleachers, we looked back, and we realized that guy in the hoodie was Chandler fucking Stephenson. And we had walked right past him, like were inches away, and had no fucking clue it was him, just blew by him. At that point, it was too late to do anything about it, but that moment haunted me for months.

Then in December 2018, I heard that TJ Oshie and Chandler Stephenson were doing a meetup event at a car dealership in town. This was my chance for redemption. I had to go. And I went, and I finally got to meet him, and I finally got to redeem myself. But in a totally me move, I spent the entire time there freaking the fuck out about TJ (who is my all-time fave and the reason I got into hockey in the first place so this was a big moment for me) and basically crying when I got up there that I ignored Chandler the entire time. I think I may have briefly acknowledged his existence. But I did get a lovely beautiful photo.

We’ll remember Chandler for his smooth skating, and for being hot and having dimples, good bone structure, and a great beard (also, I’m begging, please try eyeliner, just once). He had a cute dog, an amazing mom, and his girlfriend Tasha was wonderful. I’m still mourning the fact that we never got to hear his goal song, which was reportedly the Friends theme song (because, of course, Chandler). He was excellent at hugs, and had close bonds with many on the team, but especially that contingent that all came up from Hershey around the same time. All the best to you in Vegas, Chandler, you were a good one.

BONUS: He had 14 regular season goals + 2 playoff goals with the Caps, and here are my favorites (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8), plus a good defensive play

Thanks, Stevie

[rvbycruz]

WTFOCK SEASON 1 EPISODE 8 LIVEBLOG

this might be a really random thing to say, but jens and jana’s kissing has really improved since the beginning of the season. i don’t know what it was but for the first couple of episodes their kissing was hella awkward and stiff, but now it actually seems more natural. i guess the actors got used to it?

‘i have a test’ ‘i’m more fun than a test’

okay why are jens and jana actually growing on me now of all times.

robbe might not be jealous of jens but he’s probably jealous of jana if you know what i mean 

LUCA AND ZOE HAVE A SECRET HANDSHAKE! THE CUTEST SHIT I’VE EVER SEEN!!!

damn luka’s a whole damn fool how did multiple people spot him making out with another girl at the same party his girlfriend was at like literally 

they’re using the same song as the norway! lmao, yes it fits really well

lmao the guy who just came over to give zoe back her hat! chivalry is not dead i guess

robbe’s curls look so soft! this has been a psa!

i really liked that scene between jana and robbe! i still don’t know if robbe is going to betray jana or not but i do felt like that added a lot more to their relationship, like seeing him just genuinely trying to comfort her really just added another level of intimacy to their friendship if that makes sense? 

amber... is trying me in this moment. she really is ruthlessly being the opposite of helpful in this moment. 

part of me feels like jana should just be honest with her friends. but with the amount of judgement amber is already laying on i know it could be hard. also she should tell them when she’s ready too

okay, jana and her mother’s relationship is now officially my fave eva + her mom relationship in the scu (skam cinematic universe). but for real, that fight scene was one of the most intense i’ve seen out of all the remakes i’ve watched, and that sweet scene after with the cookies and warm milk was a welcomed addition! i feel like wtfock has done the most out of all the remakes when it comes to focusing on eva’s family

robbe shooting jana a little smile! angel!

honestly there’s something to be said about robbe still being jana’s friend despite the jens situation. like if he hasn’t betrayed her like... he was friends with jens first. he has every right to drop her like a hot potato, because loyalty you know. and yet he’s still being kind. but then again, idk if he’s gonna snake her or not so lemme not get too poetic.

zoe’s cute little dimple!! that is all!!

‘but first you have to promise me that you’ll keep loving me forever’ they’re so stinking cute i literally can’t stand it

zoe serenading jana! god my HEART!

god senne please skjdskj my dude that was an uncomfortably long stare say something please

zoe is so cute. out here watching doctor phil and genuinely excited to try out a tactic to undermine a mans ego. i love her. 

zoe and jana really are crawling up there as one of my fave eva x noora pairing

WE’RE HAVING THIS MEETING IN A PUBLIC CAFE?

okay, you know what amber, that was uncalled for, luca ordered you food you can at least say thank you 

AMBER YOU CANNOT BE TELLING LUCA TO SUPPORT YOU WHEN YOU WANTED TO KICK HER OFF OF THE TEAM LIKE A WEEK AGO AMBER PLEASE 

changes i am a bit iffy on: the long shot on jana’s face instead of the flashbacks to jonas and ingrid. i like the subtlety of seeing jana’s reaction the entire time, and think the actress did a really good job, but i also did prefer the OH SHIT impact of the flashbacks. i think it was an interesting directors choice though, and i can’t remember if that’s something i’ve seen before but it felt like a fresh perspective.  

[aggresivelyfriendly]

A Premonition of Love-Chapter 7

Hey Loves! Here is our chapter, just  in time for @dirtystyles bday-I’m glad I included her faves, like loud moaning and dry humping on bunk beds, or something like that! Tripod writing forever! Special thanks, again, to @emulateharry for the quick beta!

Himitsu No!

Last Time!

"Yeah, I got that now." And his hand went up to her face, she expected a soft touch on her jaw, but he cupped the back of her neck, and brought her forward like she was gonna be flung back, whiplash.

He tasted like sunshine on her lakebed, when the sun beat down on her shoulders after the cool of the car air conditioning.

His head slanted to the right, and she heard her own response. When her mouth opened to the glide of his tongue, her hands moved from his waist up to cross over his back. Get him and his smell closer. His shoulders were wider than her, and the height difference, those inches suddenly made a difference. Except at their hips, those notched together perfectly.

He tasted like coffee and coconut. Like sunny days layin out in LA.

His hand was in her hair, and it was messy and a little desperate. Inevitable.

Action.

"Action!" Sounded in Harry's head. Suddenly he was the director and the actor. He'd never been so forward. Well, maybe in 2013, but that was something of a lost year for him.

Harry remembered lots of it, but it felt like he was watching somebody else play another version of him. And none of that had been with somebody special, inevitable. There were no feelings involved, at least not on his side. He liked to believe not on their side. How could they have like him, they'd only just met him. That was his mantra, that they were fucking the idea of him, liked the idea, loved the idea. It was how he rationalized it.

Until his mom had sat him down and boxed his ears and asked where her son was? Because her son wouldn't take advantage of girls overcome by their inflated feelings for him.  Feelings. His mom insisted the groupies, god that word, had feelings for him, or believed they did. It may have been just an idea of him, but he was still taking advantage she had insisted. He didn't want to hurt anybody. He'd calmed down a lot after that, and then things got dramatic, and then he had feelings for Xander and they hid in plain sight. When he had feelings he supposed he was blunt about them. He had impulse control when the impulse was to love.

He was definitely feeling something now. He was feeling all of it, everything that had sounded in his mind when he'd been hungover and clumsy when he had met her for real. All the things from before that, when he'd first seen her image, and his mind had run with possibilities. The time since, where he watched her work, serious and in charge, and when she laughed, buoyant and like light- moving in waves. It was all mixing with the literal feelings of her in his hands.  His hopes for them had been shelved in the library of his mind because he was trying not to get hurt, downplay his interest and not freak her out with the long term plans he had unconsciously made. For them. All of the hopes he'd had were now intertwining with the reality of her, of this feeling, and it was was all over his brain, lighting up and activating long term memory.

He wanted to remember this forever, the feeling of her forever.

Boy had he been right about her mouth. He'd gotten a lot of compliments on his lips from lovers. It was something he brought to the table.

But, Ada Scott, she ran that table.

Her mouth was revolutionary. She filled in the space between his lips like a washer between a screw and object. Nice and snug, protective. But soft, god she was soft and her hips filled out his hands like her heart did his cracks.

Alright, he was writing fucking lyrics. Time to focus on the moment. His attention leg to action, inevitably. Her hips became her ass and the wall behind her was a sturdy surface to support them and kept him from taking her down to the metal grating on the floor.

What was that sound?

Oh shit! That was him, he'd lost all his faculties and was moaning loudly. He would have reined it in, but Ada had one hand in his hair and another was undoing his shirt and he couldn't. He wasn't sure he'd ever been with somebody this incendiary.

Now they were moaning in tandem.

Her voice sounded better than a songbird, a lark.

He wanted to hear her. He could listen to that sound, be carried by its current, every morning, noon and night for the rest of his life.

He's in a rush, a wave to her finish, when she lifted her thigh to his hip and ground against his insistence he could see the shore. A few more regressions and advances and they'd find the beginning of land and end of their tsumanmic ride.

"Harry!" Ada moaned.

"Harri!" Yuki called.

Harry had to come up to the surface to recognize the outside command. Ada's commands were what he would rather follow. What her voice was asking of him he couldn't do with another coming closer and getting louder.

Harry coasted his thumb over Ada's thigh, gave one last squeeze, and placed it down, pulled back to see her swollen lips, wet enough to dive into, and more inviting than a tropical pool on the first truly hot day, and her blinking eyes.

"Just one. More." He whispered and offered her a peck that she leaned into. Their noses notched together and around. Her hair went smoothly back when he smoothed it and he immediately wondered how unruly his looked.

"How's mine?" He could feel his giant dimples. This was the best day of his life. His tresses were tangled and messy, his fingers told him when his curious pointer finger became a concerted effort to comb out damage.

"Oh, fuck!" The knock sounded around the small wall just after she had said it. "Your hair is fucked! We are fucked!" Her voice didn't elevate, but her stress was evident.

"No, I'll just look distressed," he schooled his face into frown and pulled his lip, "see. And you look flustered."

Her hands slapped at the air above her waist and then down on her hips. "I am flustered!"

He pushed a lock behind her ear. "I know, just pretend it's at me."

"Who's pretending." And she lead the way out after she squared her shoulders. He caught the motion as she wiped his kiss, or the evidence, off her mouth. She was muttering, she looked a little pissed, definitely affected. He liked affecting her.

He found himself laughing as she walked around the wall with a square set to her jaw, like all the groaning that had just been going on was him being beat about the head and ego rather than the libido.   He needed to wipe the silly smirk off his face. Though it was rather at home there.

He knew, he'd know since her first saw her. Maybe from her films and interviews, but definitely the moment their eyes connected. He'd known.

He'd lost faith.

Harry usually trusted his feelings about people. But he rarely let himself off the hook. Ada didn't seem like a grudge holder exactly, but she did not take shit. That was clear.

And he had been shit.

If you didn't get a second chance at a first impression, he was fucked as then he'd sucked. The situation had felt hopeless, unrequited, until just last week.

But it was better, he was gonna smash this scene now. He had lots to work with. Though he still planned to use his idea for the kiss rather than what had just gone down. That was just for him and Ada.

He thought of Henry and Akio as a slow burn, a smolder. He'd give them a kiss fit for hot coals.

He and Ada had a flare up. Once given the proper fuel, a little oxygen- they were burning.

He put his hands in his hair and looked distraught as he approached the area side stage. Ayae was biting her lip when they made eye contact.

"Alright Harry?" Oh, they were selling it. Ada was frowning, fuming, she looked actually pissed. And Ayae looked concerned for him.

"Can you fix my hair? I think I fucked it up." He collapsed in the chair, coming loose like a cheap hem. "I've gotta do this right on the next take!" he huffed.

"You will Harry. You're so charming, and Henry is the sweetest character. And you and Yuki have great chemistry- just relax into it. You do so much better when you relax." Her eyes were on his hair, but she was skating, them down and biting her lip. "Maybe think about someone you want to kiss badly, if that is not Yuki....."

"The person I want to kiss," he looked at Ada mournfully. "Doesn't wanna kiss me right now."

He hoped that wasn't true.

Ada was fuming, at herself . She could not believe she had let that happen on set, wanted it to happen more on set! What was she thinking! "Goddamn you Styles!" She muttered it. But out loud. Didn't matter who heard, it would go with their act, The 'I cannot stand you and your dumb ass' act. He was pouting with all his might in the chair in front of Ayae. That was good, sympathy inducing.

Except she didn't want too much sympathy to go against her. Harry was already sympathetic enough.

Oh great- bitch rep. Again. She hurt little Harry!

She'd like to put a hurting on him.

In the short amount of time Ada had begun to re-entertain thoughts of kissing Harry on that mouth, she did not expect it to go like that. She'd seen him go full rockstar on that little stage, but she really figured that was some alter ego, something he put on that wouldn't come out without wardrobe or a microphone.

She told herself if anything happened, which she was still totally denying the possibility of, she'd have to instigate and lead.

It was a bit of a hold up for her, honestly.  It was another reason she had given herself to stay away after their flirtation.  She'd been pounding her treadmill thinking of why she wouldn't do. Knew better than to do. Exhibit A had just happened. Though she thought it would be way easier to avoid, because she could control her urges. Before he took over control of her urges. Damn him.

Another reason she had postulated was that he was so sweet and a bit insecure, in her experience, she figured that would extend into his romantic moments. His sweet little gifts only confirmed that for her. His stare downs yesterday made more sense now. He wanted approval, assurance, so she thought he would be a little timid.

She was Wrong!

Another piece of the Harry Styles puzzle. Insecure in unfamiliar or new intense circumstances and a badass elsewise.

Maybe he was the kind that took a while to cope with nerves and then got better.

He must be very sure of his mouth and its abilities. Wow! Ada wondered if that would extend to other intimacy? More naked nudity.

Ada hated leading in the bedroom. She liked being the boss everywhere else. She wanted to be bossed there, relinquish her beloved control and feel love flow into her wildly.

If that kiss was anything to go on, she was going to be handled. She loved being handled.

She had to shift on her seat, and wondered where her water bottle got to. For once the sound stage was a little too warm for her.

"Ms. Scott!" Her DP said.

"Ada!" Julie nudged her arm.

"Huh? Yes?" They were they all looking at her.

"Can we start?"

Shit, this was gonna be a distraction. He was a distraction. Harry was already in place, she'd only glanced at him once and was kinda avoiding looking at him as much as possible. He was flushed and his mouth was a little red. Did they put something on him, that green shit? The stuff that worked with your pH and gave a ovely pink.

Oh, no, it was her. She gripped her pant leg to stop from wiping her mouth. She had worn Fenty Uncuffed, only a bit should have smeared. It was set.

She wanted to test out its bounds on him. How many kisses, when? Where? How long after application, could she kiss or suck it all off? Leave smudges of another lovely pink, unlike his bath water or his natural blush.

Harry bit his lip and blinked at her. What the fuck? Sexy cow blinks? Was this a Greek story?

No! This was her story. Their story.

"Let's roll!" She gave the command, and meant it for herself more than anybody else.

The first take was slightly uncomfortable, but this time because Yuki had lost the moment.

"Sorry boss, I need to shake it off." He had directed at her.

"You need a min!" Harry laughed "What did you eat while I was getting reamed?"

Reamed? What? Oh, no, that was rimmed.

"I had a snack!" Yuki grabbed mint out of his pocket. "You should take one too, you taste like matcha. Grassy!"

Oh shit!

"Do I?" Harry smiled big! "Want more!" And he went in to kiss his co-star like it was an attack.

"Roll!" She said. They were cute already, she wanted it on film, she might get some use. It was a good moment to capture.

Once the puppy play slowed down, and Harry and Yuki let the moment become Akio and Henry's, the pace became languid. Harry's hand came up, slow, and cupped Yuki's jaw.

Her prince pulled back, giving her a shot at pulling this off as a first kiss. His smile was small, just enough to pop a dimple. And Yuki was pulling off dazed, or was dazed. The small fit of Harry's full lips into this kiss was snug as a warm blanket. Not the fire of their embrace, or laughs of the start of this one, less than one, more than the other.

Harry upped the ante, gave the camera goodness to devour, capture like so much attention. An ascension of the kiss, to a new place, a moment like Jake Ryan over the flames. His large hand splayed over Yuki's jaw and his thumb caressed his cheekbone.

Ada could feel it.

So could the cast and crew. Everybody was silent. You could hear the lip smacks and yummy noises alone among the collectively held breath.

Ada let it continue, at least she thought it was intentional, run to the end.

The caress fell, and the lip lock ended, slowly. When Harry smiled and laid his forehead on his companion's and his dimple punctuated the scene,  Ada squealed "Cut!"

And applause went up.  That was the second ovation worthy kiss he'd given today. And it was so different from hers. This boy was so many things. He was insecure, she'd seen it. He was cocky, she'd felt it, and he was damn good, they all lauded it.  She might fall for each Harry by turns. She wanted to seize each in any case.

"Amazing! Excellent work!" She clapped along. "Now let's get coverage and other angles! We may need to pull epic shots on that one!" That could go on billboards, even in still, the moment would translate, move.

She caught Harry's eye and nodded, nearly choked when he winked, but recovered enough to bit her lip and shake her head. When he was on, he was on.

This could be so fun! The flirt under everybodies noses, the danger was intoxicating.

Until she realized Julie was watching. Her friend raised her eyebrows, flared her nostrils and nodded a little.

Ada furrowed her brow and hoped it came off as confusion.

They needed rules. They had a lot of movie to finish. She needed the respect of her crew. Ada needed to put her feelings elsewhere. It was hard though, because he deserved all the praise. The rest of the day he earned it again and again, kissed multiple times, lots of ways, and each time she had to keep her cool.

To varying effect, and ability.

By 7 o'clock they'd got the shots done and set up for tomorrow. Their timeline accelerating as Harry found his feet and took off running, like her god-daughter who skipped crawling all together, went from being carried about to running the show, literally.

There was a metaphor there.

Ada was still tired at day's end, despite how well everything had gone. She was emotionally worn out from over analyzing the kiss, physically worn out from suppressing her body's response to watching Harry kiss Yuki, stomping down the same response to their kiss, and mentally tired from coming up with reasons she should stop flirting with him, or hide flirting with him.

She had no idea what this was. And she'd been weird with Harry all afternoon. She knew it. His batting average stayed high through her change up pitches.

What did they do now? They'd flirted publicly, kissed on set, and then what?

She fucked her star like all those male directors?

Dammit, she thought it was just easy for co-stars to get involved.  All that time together and mimicry of feelings, someone was bound to fall in love. She guessed that was true of directors too.

But this wasn't love. Maybe something like it, a precursor of love. Seedling.

Did she water it?

In any case, she was tired and wanted another matcha. But if she had one now, she'd be up late, thinking, with nobody to talk to. Maybe she'd go back to the hotel and have a couple glasses of wine.

She smiled to herself. Maybe she would do both.....

Harry felt exhilarated, like he did after the Graham Norton performance, when he did it right! He'd acted good. Just like Jeff said. And he'd pleased Ada.

He thought he had. He certainly had early in the day.

She'd gotten a little cagey at the end of day, but he figures she was just gun shy, he'd have to coach her through this. Business and pleasure -- he was a mixologist at. He could show her the ropes.

If she was interested. Her kiss said yes, and he was getting better at reading her. So did her freaking out.

"Hmmmm, what's this?" He asked the air when he reached the steps of his trailer and an iced coffee was waiting. He hadn't asked for one, he wouldn't be sleeping if he drank it.

The cup said, 'Ada.' Huh?

His phone buzzed in his pocket.

"Thirsty?"

[namjooncharms]

Deals with a Demon (1)

demon!jungkook x reader  

( also another supernatural!bts, they’re all different species in this one! )  

Part 2, 

description: all children believe in fairytales until they are proven wrong and demons do not fall in love. yet this one is fated and punished to do exactly that. 

i do take requests btw!<3 so send me some in

warnings: illness, mentions of death, future smut 

okay i know i’m basing these off my fave shows but still. it’s based off a korean odessey. 

at nine years old you were seeing the world through rose coloured glasses, well almost. your life wasn’t the best, but it wasn’t exactly the worst either. you had your full life ahead of you. that was until you got sick,  your small frail body is laying on the hospital bed. fast asleep. the demon lowers his face close to yours, you are so close to death. a smirk has formed on his lips, your little eyes flutter open and he doesn’t expect you to see him but your eyes land on his face. when the demon has realised you’re staring at him he stands away from you, confused. how do you see him? is it because you’re dying? 

“hello.” you say softly, your voice cracking when you do. your voice is so small and crackily that the demon  almost misses it. offering a smile back to you he perched down next to your bed. the demon isn’t particularly sure what he’s even doing in here, he sometimes finds himself watching people, uninterested but interested all at the same time. but there was something about this room, and your soul. it was like the sun, shining brightly, but the demon jacked that up to your soul getting ready to leave, he’d never witnessed such a thing before. 

“hello, little one.” his voice crawls out and he leaned against the railings of the bed. you’re so close to death that he can smell it. the smell is intoxicating. 

you try and angle yourself so that you can look at his face, he looks so much like an angel. even in your bleary state of mind. you smile again at him and he smiled back so you ask the question. “are you my angel?” you asked him and he laughed. 

“not quite little one.” the demon says. “maybe i’ll explain to you one day.” 

maybe you’re young brain has formed up an imaginary friend, one that nobody else can see because any nurse that seemed to enter the room really doesn’t take much notice of him. he talked half the night with you, a boost of energy coming to you and you weakly push yourself up. 

“what is your name?” you asked him. 

“jeon jungkook.”  he may as well tell you, you wouldn’t remember it anyway. 

“jeon jungkook.” your little voice repeats it and you smile again. 

“what’s your name little one?” he asked. 

“Y/N Y/L/N “ you say and you’re quiet for a moment. “can i ask you a favour jeon jungkook?” you ask him. 

his brows twitched and he almost frowned. he didn’t do deals or favours with humans he wasn’t one of those deal making demons, plus it was against the rules. he never had. but he supposed, you’d be dead soon, so what would it matter? 

“what can i do for you?” he asked. 

“can you protect me from the monsters and stop me from dying?” you asked quietly.

 monsters? what monsters? the only monster in here was him. the demon smiled. he couldn’t do that, people died all the time. and you were close.  “of course.” so he holds out his hand offering it to you his pinkie outstretched. your small hand has lifted and you curled your small pinkie around his. it would be harmless wouldn’t it? 

“is it a deal?” you asked yawning, ready for sleep, which the demon took as something else. 

“it’s a deal.” he smirked. 

over fourteen years later you still every now and then thought of your angel, the one who had saved your life.  and you’re getting on with your life. that whole night had just been a dream as far as you were concerned. after turning twelve your family moved to Australia where you lived until you turned you were old enough to move out on your own and when you did you managed to secure a job in Seoul. You’d only been there about a week. you’re not new to the culture and the language  you‘ve been studying since you were small. 

but working at this place called big hit seemed like the perfect scape goat to get out of home and live by yourself. you were happy when the job was offered to you more or less on a plate and you weren’t sure why but you weren’t complaining. you just needed a new life, one that was your own. you loved your parents, you really did but, it didn’t mean you wanted to be stuck under their over protectiveness forever. you fix the bottom of your dress as you walk through the unfamiliar building, having gotten a job as a.. now that you think about it, you don’t know what the job is. 

you frown at the thought as you walk through the doors of big hit entertainment and looked around almost immediately, a woman stands in front of you. “ miss Y/LN ?” she asked and you offer her a small smile and a nod. “ right this way, miss. “ she gestured where you had to go and you followed, your heels clicking off the floor, they made you so uncomfortable but you wanted to impress at least someone. the woman opened the door and you walked through looking around, your eyes falling on the man in the suit who stands up, bang pd nim as you knew him as anyway. “ahh, miss Y/L/N.” he smiled walking over holding his hand out. 

his hand is larger around yours but you smile brightly shaking it with a strong grasp. “nice to meet you too, sir.” you speak and you look around. he offered to take you  a tour of the building and you gladly agree you wish to see where you’d be working from now on and bang pd nim would be more than happy to show you. 

you’re walking around for about half an hour when he takes you to get a coffee, explaining your job, which is basically an assistant to him, helping him with the band known as bts. when asked if you knew anything about them you sheepishly admitted that you didn’t. you’d expected a different reaction from the laugh you’d gotten but being sheltered your whole life meant that you didn’t really know much about anything, but it wouldn’t take long to find out. 

unaware of the six pair of  eyes on you, bang pd nim hands you the mug of coffee and you hold it in your freezing cold hands. one set of eyes is missing, and he’s yet to show his face. “the demon better hurry his ass up.” namjoon grunted under his breath. the eldest looked towards him. “he’s coming. i can hear him.” only gaining another grunt from the leader, the vampire next to him shakes his head and they all look back to you. you’re like a beacon of light. like the sun. glowing, brightly for all to see. 

it’s when he appears that namjoon growls an insult at him, only for the demon to snarl back in response. despite all being different and in no way connected, they all worked well, and most of the time got along well. keeping up appearances was sometimes difficult but they got on with it. “what exactly are we here for again?” the demon scowled, sure yes it was a day off but this was important apparently jimin pointed “ the new assistant. that’s what we’ve been called here for.”  

sighing, another dumb fucking human assistant that would either be a plaything for one of the elder boys or be fired in two weeks for doing something stupid. “her.” taehyung pointed in the direction to show the demon, jungkook turned with a scowl to finally look at you, his doe looking eyes have widened and it’s like he’s frozen. he recognises your soul almost instantly bright, shining as clear as day. “tfuck..” is what he hears but doesn’t realise he’s said it just as you and bang pd nim have turned, the older man is pointing towards them, because he wanted you to meet them. you’re smiling, and he realises that you are you, still shining as brightly as you were the night he fucked everything up for himself. 

“ah, the boys.” bang pd nim started and you turn to look but your heart stops. and every member notice the way you and jungkook are looking at each other. seokjin can hear your heart pounding wildy now and he glances at jungkook. you’re so startled at the sight of him that the cup of hot steaming coffee slips from your hands the mug immediately shattering and the hot liquid has not only splashed onto your bare thighs but has burned your hand from slipping out of your grasp. everything has fallen silent and you’re first to break the eye contact because you think you’re going crazy. you had imagined him. 

“i’m so sorry.” your voice rushed out and bang pd nim shakes his head helping you calling to the boys to get something to clean up. you’ve picked up all the shattered pieces except one and a hand throws itself outward to pick it up just as you have and your hands meet in the centre. an electric shock vibrates up your hand and you pull away with a flinch, the larger hand still there and you look up, eyes meeting those doe ones that you had never forgotton about. 

“move over.” yoongi has gently moved beside the demon who’s still beside you, to help clean up the coffee. bang pd nim has had someone else take the remains of the mug away and you stand up just as jungkook does both still staring at each other and you only look away when pd nim speaks. “i thought you didn’t know anything of bts?” he asked and you smile, a tight lipped smile. “i don’t.” he laughed at that and shook his head. “the boys, miss Y/L/N.” and he pointed. “this is their leader.” 

you look towards him and he holds out his hand. “kim namjoon.” he smiled slightly, and you’re instantly taken with his dimples, you’ve never seen such a thing, you nod, looking from him to to kim seokjin, then min yoongi, park jimin, kim  taehyung and jung hoseok,  lastly him. the angel. your angel. 

he, despite wanting to disappear holds his hand out to you, which you take hesitantly, waiting. if he says the name you’ve thought about for years then you just might die. you wait, fingers lightly pressed against his hand and he says it. feeling lightheaded as you wait while holding your breath because you might pass out.his voice is almost like velvet but that’s not what gets you, it’s the name. 

“jeon jungkook.” 

[babyhoneyhalo]

fic rec no.2

here I am again with more of my faves!!! more fluff....more boys in love....i’m here for it :)) here we go:

bring out feelings in me i never show by tomorrows

Summary: “I really think you should stop reading,” Liam says, having moved to hover behind Louis’ back at some point. “I can already see the cogs turning in your head, Louis, and I don’t like this.” “Shut up,” Louis waves him off and continues reading. I can do these things, at your request: openly hit on other female guests while you act like you don’t notice; start instigative discussions about politics and/or religion; propose to you in front of everyone; pretend to be really drunk as the evening goes on (sorry I don’t drink, but I used to); start an actual, physical fight with a family member, either inside or on the front lawn for all the neighbors to see. [Louis accidentally hires a felon to be his fake boyfriend for Thanksgiving. Or, the fake boyfriends au no one asked for, inspired by this.] Words: 24652

Stuck In The Middle With You by green_feelings

Summary: When Harry starts university, he finally gets to spend every day with Louis again. They have been friends since forever, and would do anything for each other. Given that, Harry doesn't hesitate to pose as Louis' boyfriend once he finds out that his new roommate is no other than Louis' crush. Cue the usual. And maybe a bit of the unusual. Words: 11317

Always Come Back To You by whoknows

Summary: “I’ll do it,” Harry offers brightly. No one even blinks. “I’ll do it?” Louis sighs irritably. “Shut up,” he orders, tossing a pillow in the general direction of Harry’s face. This is a terrible time for jokes, especially Harry’s lame, old people ones. Not that it was an old people joke. Just that most of the time Harry’s jokes consist of knock-knocks or terrible puns. The type of jokes old people like, Louis’ pretty sure. His nan always finds them hilarious when Harry tells her one. Harry bats the pillow out of the air without even blinking. “Be reasonable, Lou,” he says in his most reasonable voice. Louis is perfectly reasonable, thank you very much, and he’s also frustrated and upset and tired and he really wants to punch something. Maybe he should have held on to that pillow a little longer. “You’re not gonna fucking do it,” he snaps. “That’s the last thing I need.” Words: 28682

We Will Find Our Way by supernope

Summary: Harry smiles at Louis, quick and easy, and says, “Well, since we’re in the same boat, we’ll just make our own Christmas. What do you say?” Louis tamps down on a bloom of warmth in his belly. He barely knows Harry past seeing him walk down the hall in just his skivvies - not that he’s complaining - but he’s being so lovely, smiling at him so hopefully, and, well. Louis doesn’t much fancy the idea of spending Christmas completely alone. Nodding, he reaches out and pokes Harry’s dimple, watches it flirt to life underneath his fingertip. “I say yes.” AKA, Harry and Louis are uni students studying abroad in New York, stuck in the dorms together over Christmas. Words: 9580

Inconceivable by alivingfire

Summary: Sometimes, Harry thinks, there's something there. The spark in his belly isn't just happening to him, surely. Surely Louis feels that rush too, that blossoming heat in his blood when their fingers brush. But no. No, Louis treats Harry like a best friend—and it's an amazing thing, so wonderful, Harry wouldn't trade his friendship with Louis for anything—and there's no room for anything else. Not between them. But Louis adores Niall. It’s clear, obvious in their comfort together. Harry and Louis still have something that keeps them from that, something making things more loaded with possibility, more intense. Like magnets with the same pole, an invisible force pushing them back—maybe that’s Harry’s crush, a barrier keeping them apart. Louis and Niall’s friendship is easy, whatever is between Louis and Harry is something else. Weighted. Which is fine. It's good. Niall clearly loves Louis back, so it's great. And Harry can just keep lying to himself for the rest of eternity. Louis and Barbara Tomlinson are twin brother and sister. Harry's in love with Louis, Niall's in love with Barbara, and they both go by Tommo. It gets a little confusing. Words: 23194

You're Writing Verses About Me by Rearviewdreamer

Summary: Everybody knows that Louis has never been one for serious boyfriends. His reputation around campus precedes him, which is why he doesn't think twice before proudly telling his mother about his new and completely fabricated relationship with his oddly quiet and completely gorgeous new roommate Harry to shut her up about his lack of commitment. It's the perfect lie; a flawless plan, or at least it was until Louis' ordered to bring his fabulous new boyfriend home. Words: 23984

Just a Fine and Fancy Ramble by throughthedark

Summary: Louis continues to watch as the fit boy waggles his eyebrows dramatically at the penguin. Clearly, he's very invested in winning the staring contest, which means Louis still has time to come up with a plan of attack. He turns to his sisters. “Girls, look cute. You know how to snag a boy right?” College Au where Harry leads an army of penguins and rocks purple penis headscarves, Louis is generally covered in pigeon shit and panicking over worm dissections, Liam just wants to save his pet bird from Harry's ill thought out sacrificial plans, and Niall and Zayn are definitely not dating. Words: 13736

i never even had a chance you know (you had me from hello) by wonderwalls

Summary: Harry suffers a severe case of falling in love at first sight and accidentally purchasing a symbol of lifelong commitment and then lacking the courage to remove said symbol from his sock drawer for four years. Words: 2821

we fool ourselves so much we could do it for a living by veterization

Summary: Louis has been King of Pranks in his dorm for two years, and a random freshman named Harry Styles isn't going to take that title from him. It is on. Words: 24064

Spin Me Like A Record by zarah5

Summary: Uni AU. Sometimes, Louis poses as Harry’s boyfriend. It doesn’t mean anything. Really. Words: 8716

[mauloveskpop]

kpop tag

tagged by @chahakyn <3<3<3

1) 5 favorite groups?

VIXX, The Rose, Brave Girls, Dreamcatcher & B.A.P

2) Top 5 on your bias list?

Song Kyungil, Park Chanyeol, Nam Yujeong, Bang Yongguk and I’m not set on a fifth either Hani or Hyuna

3) Ult Bias group and why you love them?

VIXX & The Rose. I listened to VIXX’s title tracks since I got into kpop almost two years ago now but I didn’t stan until right before Whisper came out (as an LR biased person I died). They’re just so stupid and gorgeous and talented and I just love those idiots. The Rose had me snatched from the second I heard their debut song Sorry. I know Woosung dragged in a lot of people with his vocals in those first seconds of Sorry. They also idiots lmao, I love all my idiots <3

4) Ult Bias and why you love them?

I have four so prepare yourselves.

Song Kyungil the man that got me interested in boy groups. The abs lure you in and then you’re trapped cause he’s actually adorable. He’s technically not an idol anymore but I will love him forever.

Park Chanyeol, he was my fourth EXO bias. One day he just decided he’d take the top spot.  Again adorable! He’s a puppy. Dimples. So talented and I just  love everything about him. When Kyungil enlisted I figured I’d bring someone else into the ult bias territory and it was Chanyeol.

Nam Yujeong, from the first Brave Girls mv I watched I was just.... that one. Once again adorable! The cutest girl I’ve ever seen. But man what a woman. She reminds me of squirtle when she smiles. Also a huge dork.

Bang Yongguk, I’m sure you can guess it. ADORABLE! That smile of his makes me melt everytime. That deep voice of his too, wow. Also the tattoos, yes.

5) Favorite Kpop Meme

Anything Taemin really lol, he’s a great meme.

6) Favorite pic of your ult? (I dare you to only pick one)

Well like we’ve established there’s four so I’ll put a read more here cause it’s bout to get looong

Kyungil:

Chanyeol:

Toben is life <3 (their hair matched)

Yujeong:

The hardest one cause every single photo of her is the best

Yongguk:

This took foreever

7) 5 Favorite Kpop MVs

4Minute - Crazy | The Rose - Sorry | VIXX - Chained Up (any of their mvs would do tho) | Ladies Code - The Rain | Red Velvet - Bad Boy

8) 10 Favorite Kpop songs?

I’ll just do like atm cause this changes a lot.

B.A.P - Diamond 4 Ya | B.A.P - Wake Me Up | Momoland - Bboom Bboom | Stellar - Marionette | NCT U - Baby Don’t Stop | CLC - Like That (all songs on black dress really) | BoA - One Shot Two Shot | AKMU - RE-BYE | 4Minute - Crazy | History - Queen

9) Favorite Kpop crack video?

I don’t watch crack videos

10) Favorite content creator within the fandom?

Which fandom lol? I don’t really have specific faves.

11) What fandoms would you say you’re an active member of?

Black Roses, Starlights, Storia (even though they’ve disbanded)

12) Take your top 3 biases- fmk

Kyungil, Chanyeol, Yujeong? wow that’s a tough one.

f chanyeol, m yujeong, k kyungil cause i’m sure i wouldn’t succeed anyways.

13) If you could be best friends with any idol, who would you choose?

Taemin

14) If you could date any idol, who?

Wow there’s so many good options. This changes on the daily sometimes. Let’s go with Yongguk today

15) What’s one Kpop album you think everyone should have listened to?

FTISLAND’s 10th anniversary album

16) Are you a soft or a hard stan? 85% soft, 15% hard (just gonna copy your answer lol)

17) An idol that makes you go into soft mode?

Let me make a list. Ravi, Leo, N, Yongguk, Kyungil, Chanyeol, Jongin, Yixing, Suho, all of The Rose, Hani, Hyuna, Yujeong, Jiu, Momo and more

18) An idol that makes you want to smash the empire state building with one single punch?

Ravi, Matthew (BM), Kyungil those are the ones that come to mind

19) Favorite vocalist?

Aww man, Hongki. FTISLAND

20) Favorite Rapper?

Yeeun, CLC

21) Favorite dancer?

Ten, NCT | Taemin, Shinee

22) Things you have in common with your ult?

which one? Kyungil and I seem to have a similar taste in TV shows. Chanyeol and I share a strong love for animals. Yujeong I dunno that’s a tougher one, we have a similar body type I think except she’s 10 times more fit lol. Yongguk, we’re both quiet ones who laugh at stupid things.

23) The most beautiful trait any idol can have?

accepting themselves for what they are and knowing that they don’t need to change anything about themselves to make people love them. (stealing your answer again cause i agree)

24) Songs that will always make you jam along?

Momoland - Bboom Bboom | BIGBANG - Bang Bang Bang | EXO - Love Me Right | EXO - Monster | VIXX - Dynamite | N.Flying - Hot Potato

25) Your worst wrecker?

Half of VIXX and Xiumin

26) Any kpop concerts you’ve been to?

KARD

27) Favorite choreo?

Anything VIXX, EXID - DDD, Hyuna - Lip & Hip

28) Favorite live performance?

Oh boy. VIXX - Love Me Do

29) Favorite debut mv?

The Rose - Sorry / Dreamcatcher - Chase Me

30) Recommend a rookie group

The Rose & Dreamcatcher

31.) A kpop song you could listen to every day for the rest of your life?

B.A.P - Wake Me Up

32) Tag some cute mutuals you’d like to get to know better (and to do this challenge)!

@01kenta @tasteless-ratatouille @allofmylovelove @jarpark @vantaeto @leetaeminie 

[the-jade-goblin]

Hi! I've seen that you really like k-pop, I've been trying to get into k-pop but I don't know where to start. What was your first k-pop song? Or your favourite groups?

Hi Nonny! I’d love to help you out in your k-pop journey, there is a lot of content out there so it can be intimidating to get started. 

I’ll combine your questions to give you some solid recommendations - my first songs that I heard from some of my favourite groups, AND I’ll throw in my current fave songs from those groups so you can check them out! 

My very first k-pop song that I heard was Sad Tango by Bi Rain; I was in primary school (middle school) and teaching myself Japanese, so I went on this anime site to find some Japanese bands that I could listen to, and the Japanese version of Sad Tango was listed there. 

I really liked it and became obsessed with Bi Rain, but as I was young, my friends peer pressured me into stop listening to him and “Weird” stuff and instead I went back to listening to the Jonas Brothers and Nickleback bc I didn’t want my friends to stop liking me. 

It wasn’t until I was in yr10 of highschool did I re-immerse myself into k-pop. I was in the library and a girl I’d just met in math class the day before was listening to something on her laptop - she was watching an MV and I got curious and came over to ask her what it was. 

She told me it was called Lucifer, but a k-pop group called SHINee. My instant reaction was “oh that’s so weird?” but I took the earphone she offered me and watched it with her. I loved it. She then showed me other MVs from SHINee, and I was hooked. With a friend who was also into it I felt more confident in my passion for k-pop, and she became my k-pop supplier haha

She and I still best friends to this day, though we now have many more k-pop friends (and friends we’ve converted to k-pop *evil laughter*) and we’ve gone to so many concerts together to meet some of our favourite groups.

Now that my personal history is over with, I’ll get to the recommendations! 

I’ll go through my favourite groups, and the first songs I heard from them + my current favourite songs of theirs! I’ll go in alphabetical order to make things easier to navigate, and I’ll provide links to all songs listed

Under the cut because this is a LONG POST

1. B1A4 

My first B1A4 song was Beautiful Target, their debut song. My current favourite is not a title track but I love it, and it’s called Wonderful Tonight (unplugged remix) from their first album It B1A4. My favourite title track is 걸어 본다 (Tried to Walk) from Into the Wind.

B1A4 was my very first kpop concert, I went to see them in Sydney in 2014 - their first Australia concert - with my friend, literally the DAY after we graduated from highschool - while others went to the afterparty after our formal (prom), we went to the airport

2. B.A.P

The first BAP song I heard was, once again, their debut song Warrior, back when we called them Blonde Asian People bc at the time they all had blonde hair haha 

My all-time fave BAP song is One Shot, but there are SO many others that could hold that title too - like 1004 Angel, Wake Me Up, Save Me, Honeymoon, Hands Up, Skydive, Young Wild & Free - there’s so many. I really recommend BAP for beginner kpoppers

I saw BAP in concert in Sydney in 2016 for their Live on Earth tour - their 2nd Australia concert

3. Boyfriend

I was with Boyfriend since debut (no surprise there I’ve followed many since debut lmao) so my first song of theirs was their debut song Boyfriend. My ultimate favourite Boyfriend song is Janus

I saw Boyfriend in Sydney, along with JJCC, in 2016 - their first Australia concert

4. BTS

BTS is one of my all-time favourite groups, I’m so emotional about these boys I love them to death. My first song of theirs was their debut song No More Dream. I have a thousand favourite BTS songs, there’s so many that I adore, but if I really had to pick I’d say currently my favourite title track is Save Me, and my favourite non-title track is Best of Me, but there SO MANY others I could have picked, like Serendipity, Dope, Fire, Danger, Boy in Luv, Hip Hop Phile, Let me Know, DNA, Dimple, MIC Drop, We On, If I Ruled the World, War of Hormone, Blood Sweat and Tears - ALL OF THE SOLOS Begin, Lie, Stigma, First Love, Reflection, Awake, MAMA - Lost, Spring Day, 21st Century Girl, Wings, Cypher 4, Not Today, I Need U, Converse High, Young Forever, Run, Butterfly, Ma City, Baepsae, Autumn Leaves, TO NAME A FEW  

I saw BTS in Sydney a few years ago, their first Australian concert

5. B2ST 

Beast is no longer called that, it’s called Highlight now since they lost a member and re-branded themselves, and tbh I haven’t listened to any of their stuff under Highlight (my bias was Hyunseung, the member who left) but I still love B2ST even if I don’t listen to them much anymore

My first B2ST song was, unsurprisingly, their debut song Bad Girl (when you watch the MV you have to remember this was 8 years ago, and kpop was…very different back then. Like Asian Eurovision. It was…bad)

My favourite song from B2ST is a non-title track called I Knew It, but my favourite title track is probably Fiction, it’s old but it’s good

6. CNBLUE

Again my first song of CNBlue was their debut I’m A Loner. CNBlue isn’t a dance group like most kpop groups, they’re an actual band so they play their own instruments. 

My favourite CNBlue song is a toss up between the non-title tracks Lie (tho I prefer the Japanese version) and Sweet Holiday. My favourite title track is In My Head I think, but again that’s a Japanese release

7. EXO

Mama was EXO’s deubt song, and surprisingly this was actually not my first EXO song. I came a little late on the EXO train, I wasn’t following the hype of EXO pre-debut, so my first song was actually their second single History.

My absolute favourite EXO song is Miracles in December from their first Christmas album, and will always be my fave

I went to see EXO at K-Con in Sydney last year

8. FTIsland

FTIsland is another k-pop band, and my first song of theirs was Love Love Love, which isn’t their debut song Love Sick. My favourite FTIsland song is an old one called Hello Hello

9. Girl’s Day

My favourite girl group! I wasn’t into girl groups for a long time so I came into Girl’s Day quite late; my first song of theirs was Something, which is still my favourite Girls Day song, tied with Expect

10. Infinite

My first Infinite song was Paradise, which is from their first album but not their debut song. I’ve had a lot of favourite Infinite songs, like Before the Dawn, Last Romeo, Destiny and Bad, but I think my favourite currently is Back

11. MBLAQ

MBLAQ are an old favourite of mine. My first song wasn’t their debut song, it was a song called Stay (again, kpop was…very different back then) and it’s probably still one of my favourite MBLAQ songs, but my ultimate favourite I think is This Is War (its a great karaoke song)

12. Monsta X

I love Monsta X with all my heart, though I got into them a little later. My first song was Hero from their second extended play, and is still a fave. I have many favourite Monsta X songs, most of them non-title tracks, Ex Girl, Perfect Girl, Incomparable, Amen, Broken Heart and Miss You to name a few, but for title tracks I think my favourite is a tie between Beautiful and Shine Forever - I also adore the acoustic version of Beautiful

I saw Monsta X at K-Con last year

EDIT: MONSTA X JUST HAD A COMEBACK LIKE YESTERDAY AND ITS’ THE BEST THING EVER

My new favourite Monsta X song is Jealousy, Destroyer, and Lost in the Dream - wait no Special, idk they’re all lit as fuck

13. NU’EST 

My first Nu’Est song was their debut song FACE. My favourite Nu’est song is probably Yeoboseyo, but I adore Not Over You and Good Bye Bye equally

14. Pentagon

My first Pentagon song was their debut Gorilla, and while my favourite used to be 감이 오지 it’s now Like This and Runaway

I saw Pentagon at K-Con last year

15. Seventeen

Seventeen is amazing; my first song of theirs was Shining Diamond, which is technically not their debut song Adore U because it’s not the tile-track, but it’s the first track on the album and I pre-ordered it before I listened to any of their material and Adore U was the second track is listened to so like idk point is I’ve been here since debut. Seventeen is made up of three sub-units that’s important, the vocal unit, the hip-hop unit, and the performance unit

I have a lot of fave Seventeen songs, including If I, Rock, 20, Say Yes and Adore U (vocal team ver.), and while Don’t Wanna Cry has been a long-standing fave,  lately I’ve fallen back in love with three songs in particular; 13월의 춤 from the Performance Unit, Trauma from the Hip-Hop Unit, and Change Up from the Seventeen leaders, a new unit made up of the leaders of each sub-unit

I saw Seventeen in Sydney a few years ago

16. SF9

I’ve been a fan of SF9 since their debut of Fanfare. I love this group and have so many favourites, like K.O, Easy Love, Jungle Game and Roar, but my favourite is O Sole Mio

I saw SF9 at K-Con last year

17. SHINee

SHINee was the first kpop group I fell in love with, my first song of theirs was Lucifer. There are so many faves I could list from SHINee. Dazzling Girl, Juliette, Amigo, Hello, In my Room, Romantic, SHINee Girl, JoJo, Up & Down, Electric Heart, A-Yo, Ready or Not, Love Pain TO NAME A FEW

My forever-fave is Replay their debut song and Quasimodo (and yes, I don’t listen to new SHINee stuff, I haven’t listened to any new songs since the Sherlock album, oh except like the title track Everybody and Why So Serious. I’m an old-school SHINee fan I prefer their old music)

If you’re going to get into SHINee you should be aware that their main singer Jonghyun recently committed suicide, so there’s a lot of pain in the community right now. I personally have not been able to listen to a single SHINee song since he died. I burst into tears when I tried to play Replay, and I did listen to Crazy, Jonghyun’s single debut, twice since then but I cried half way through both times and had to skip the song. 

18. Super Junior

MY ULTIMATE BIAS GROUP! 

My first song from SuJu was No Other, but since then I have loved all their other releases. I’ve bought every CD they’ve ever produced and practically devoted most of my life to them, so you could say I’m a bit of an ELF expert XD

My absolute favourite songs will always be Neorago, Evanesce and A-Cha (my must karaoke songs) but there are so many others.

Super Junior also has many sub-units including; Super Junior M (Chinese unit) Super Junior T (trot music unit) Super Junior Happy (cute concept unit) Super Junior K.R.Y (the vocal line unit consisting of Kyuhyun, Ryeowook and Yesung) and Super Junior D&E (dynamic duo unit with Donghae and Eunhyuk) 

Most of the members have their own solo careers too; Kyuhyun, Ryeowook and Yesung in particular, also SJM members Zhoumi and Henry. Heechul also has his own band with TRAX member Jungmo called M&D, they write their own lyrics and music, perform and film the mvs on their own - which is why they’re so weird xD Heechul’s a weirdo

A incomplete list of my favourite main group SuJu songs; Shake It Up!, Oops!!, 나쁜 여자, 사랑이 이렇게, Reset, What If, Dead at Heart, Happy Together,  Hit Me Up, Don’t Leave Me, Islands, Scene Stealer, Haru, Bittersweet, Daydream, So I, Over, Love U More, Sapphire Blue, Missin U, Our Love, 사랑이 죽는 병, One More Chance, Shirt, Opera (Japanese ver.), U, Don’t Don, Sorry Sorry, Marry U      

If you’re gonna check out the subgroups I recommend; D&E - Still You, Growing Pains, Sweater and Jeans, Don’t Wake Me Up, Breaking Up | SJM - Break Down, Perfection, Super Girl, Go, Strong | M&D - 울산바위, Close Ur Mouth, Springs Days of my Life (which is a cover I believe), Narcissus

and I’ll leave the other subgroups and solos to your own browsing pleasure, I’ve rambled about SuJu for too long already ^^;

19. Stray Kids

MY CURRENT OBSESSION! I LOVE THESE BOYS SO MUCH ;O;

Stray Kids originally appeared an a survival reality show for JYP’s next boy group. There was lots of pain and tears during the elimination rounds, and I won’t spoil it for you if you want to watch it, but I’m so happy the ot9 got to debut together - plus Chan and Felix are Australian! and Felix’s Aussie accent is thicker than mine xD it sounds so bad 

Since Stray Kids have only just debuted, as of like, freaking yesterday, they’ve only got a limited number of songs. But they’re all so good I HIGHLY recommend! Stray Kids released a pre-debut mixtape made up of the songs they wrote on their survival show, and yesterday they made their official debut with their second mixtape. 

So because they’ve only got those two albums so far, I’m going to link the entire albums here, along with their performance videos of Young Wings, Grr,  because honestly I can’t pick a favourite song from the two I love them both so much. Needless to say my first Stray Kids song was both their pre-debut title track Hellevator, and their official debut title track District 9 xD

Their first mixtape can be found in its entirety here, and their second album “I am NOT” here

AGAIN, I CANNOT RECOMMEND THESE BOYS ENOUGH

I HAVE SEEN THEM GO THROUGH SO MUCH PAIN AND ANGUISH TO GET TO THIS POINT AND I’M SO FUCKING PROUD OF THEM OKAY I’M VERY EMOTIONAL ABOUT THESE SWEETHEARTS

Ahem, moving on...

20. Teen Top

Teen Top is another old school fave of mine. My first Teen Top song was Crazy, which wasn’t their debut song Clap, but they both remain very nostalgic faves for me. 

My favourite Teen Top song is probably Love Is, tho it used to be I’m Sorry and Missing

21. UKISS

Ukiss debuted the same year as SHINee, so they were sort of overshadowed in their debut. My first UKISS song wasn’t their debut song, it was Man Man Ha Ni, which is most Kiss Me’s first song. 

Ukiss have lost a lot of members over the years, and gained new ones in return. Mostly they’re active in Japan rather than Korea so they have a lot more Japanese releases than Korean ones, tho my favourite remains 0330, a Korean release.  

Other of my faves include, Love On You, Mysterious Lady, She’s Mine, Quit Playing, Heartless, Tick Tack, Forbidden Love, DoraDora, Alone, Sweetie, Believe, Standing Still, Every Day, I Don’t Understand and Neverland

While I haven’t seen UKISS live, I did meet one of the members, my bias Kevin, at K-Con last year. He was the host and I got to meet him during my hi-touch event with UP10TION briefly - best day ever

Speaking of UP10TION...

22. UP10TION 

Another group I highly recommend, all the members are such talented sweethearts. My first UP10TION song was their debut song So Dangerous and it’s still a solid fave of mine, as well Runner 

Currently my fave song of theirs is tie between Going Crazy and their latest release Candyland in terms of title tracks, it used to be Catch Me! and Wild Love tho. Non-title tracks, I love Everyday, Be My Luck, Come With Me, and Holic  

I saw UP10TION at K-Con last year - I told Sunyoul he was really cute and he got so shy it was adorable, but I digress

23. VIXX

We’re nearly there just bear with me haha

VIXX is life, VIXX is love. My first song of theirs was their debut song Super Hero, which was..fine, I mean I’m very glad they’re where they are now they’ve progressed so much. 

My fave VIXX title song is probably Error, but I die for Fantasy, Hyde, The Closer, Shangri-La, and Chained Up too. For non-title tracks I adore Love Me Do, Eternity, Rock Ur Body, Six Feet Under and The Romance is Over. 

I saw VIXX last year in Melbourne    

24. Winner

Winner is the forgotten group of YG, who’s only interest lies in Big Bang let’s be real. Personally I prefer Winner, but that opinion seems to be controversial in the kpop fandom (Big Bang is overrated, there I said it). Winner is the product of a reality survival show, who won their debut that way over their competitors iKon who debuted later under the same label.  

Anyway, my first Winner song was their debut song Empty, though my favourite remains Different. For title songs my favourite is a tie between Really Really and Fool. I love their first album the most so I can only rec my faves from that album, Don’t flirt, I’m Him, Love is a lie and Color Ring.

25. Day6

I know this is D but it’s down here bc they’re not on my playlist I was working from and I forgot to add them earlier. 

Day6 is another band group, from JYP the company Stray Kids has just debuted from. They have consistently released a comeback every month for the last year so they work hard to get where they are and we need more fans for these sweethearts. 

My favourite Day6 is also my first song, I Loved You, which isn’t their debut song but I got into them a little late. From them all their songs are stellar, but I recommend Free, How Can I Say, When You Love Someone, What Can I Do, Man in a movie, I Wait, I Smile, Out of my Mind, I Like You and First Time  

ps most of the mvs tell the clearly obvious one-sided love story between Wonpil and Sungjin and no one can tell me different

HONOURABLE MENTIONS

For groups that I love but didn’t make it into the top *counts* 25 apparently 

NCT, including their sub-units NCT U, NCT Dream and NCT 127. My favourite are NCT U and 127 

For NCT U I recommend Without You, The 7th Sense, Baby Don’t Stop and Boss

From NCT 127 I recommend Cherry Bomb, Mad City, Good Thing, Whiplash, Baby Don’t Like It

Wanna One - a product of another reality survival show called Produce 101, out of 101 trainees these boys from various companies were picked. Their contract has been extended but it does end this year, so they will be disbanding and returning to their companies. Still, they have some good music that I recommend, Energetic, Boomerang, Burn It Up, and Beautiful   

VAV - ABC, Flower, Under the Moonlight

GOT7 - also from JYP, I recommend Girls Girls Girls, Just Right, If You Do, Look, and Never Ever  

VICTON - Eyez Eyez, Blank, #Begin Again

ROMEO - Love Sick, Miro, Without U, Hustle

MYTEEN - Amazing, Mr. Misery

Madtown, who have sadly disbanded now - OMGT, New World, Lie

iKon - Rhythm Ta, Dumb & Dumber, My Type

JJCC - BingBingBing, Be Good, Insomnia, Fire, Trauma, Where you at

Cross Gene - Billion Dolla, Shooting Star, La-Di Da-Di, Sky High, Black or White

History, who have also disbanded recently - What Am I To You, Queen, Might Just Die, Psycho    

[howellstvdies]

pretty long post coming up! thanks to @flcwerstudies  for tagging me! love ya, babe

1. when you have cereal, do you have more milk than cereal or more cereal than milk? 

i try and make it even, but somehow there always ends up being milk left behind. it annoys me so much

2: do you like the feeling of cold air on your cheeks on a wintery day? 

it depends. some days, i’m elsa (the cold never bother me anyway!); some days all i ever want from life is warmth and cuddles and a cat

3: what random objects do you use to bookmark your books? 

business cards, paper towels, my phone, pens, a necklace once. i nearly lost it, then

4: how do you take your coffee/tea? 

tea: two spoons of sugar and milk, but i don’t take it that much.

coffee: creamer or two spoons of sugar.

5: are you self-conscious of your smile? 

yes, it’s ridiculous

6: do you keep plants? 

not yet!

7: do you name your plants? 

i’m planning on naming them sherlock and finn, and then name some of them after bts

8: what artistic medium do you use to express your feelings? 

journaling, writing, drawing (if what i do can be considered drawing), and lots and lots of singing 

9: do you like singing/humming to yourself? 

yes, because i like the fact that i can hit power notes (like when i’m singing burn from hamilton)

10: do you sleep on your back, side, or stomach? 

stomach and side, but mostly on my tummy.

11: what’s an inner joke you have with your friends? 

so far, there’s “i could be a stripper” and “goshdarn oprah”

12: what’s your favorite planet? 

i like pluto because it’s a smol bean, and saturn because of the rings

13: what’s something that made you smile today? 

i watched america’s funniest videos with my mom

14: if you were to live with your best friend in an old flat in a big city, what would it look like? 

there would be books EVERYWHERE, and two cats lounging around, and a coffee maker, and blankets EVERYWHERE. also, high speed wifi

15: go google a weird space fact and tell us what it is! 

scientists have traced unusually regular radio signals being emitted from an unknown object in the galaxy m82.

ALIENS PEOPLE!

16: what’s your favorite pasta dish? 

i haven’t really had that many pasta dishes, but i’ll eat it any day

17: what color do you really want to dye your hair?

a dark blue, with streaks of tardis blue

18: tell us about something dumb/funny you did that has since gone down in history between you and your friends and is always brought up. 

i don’t really have anything right now 

19: do you keep a journal? what do you write/draw/ in it? 

i do keep a journal. i try to write reflections and things like that, but i’m always just ranting about how stupid and cowardly i am. and there are some to-do lists. 

20: what’s your favorite eye color? 

i’m probably just saying this because i have a crush on someone with this color eyes, but blue-grey eyes make me weak at the knees.

21: talk about your favorite bag, the one that’s been to hell and back with you and that you love to pieces.

my favorite bag is my school bag, to be honest, because that’s where all the books are. 

22: are you a morning person? 

nope, i’m a night person, but i also force myself to sleep early.

23: what’s your favorite thing to do on lazy days where you have 0 obligations? 

sleep, watch netflix, watch dan and phil, read

24: is there someone out there you would trust with every single one of your secrets? 

there is one person that i’m slowly getting there with, and another person i really want to get there with, but none so far

25: what’s the weirdest place you’ve ever broken into? 

nowhere, yet

26: what are the shoes you’ve had for forever and wear with every single outfit? 

i wear my white sneakers quite a bit, but i haven’t had them for forever. i also wear my snow boots a lot, but that’s because they’re warm and i am weak.

27: what’s your favorite bubblegum flavor?

i don’t have gum that much, but i like strawberry.

28: sunrise or sunset?  

sunset.

29: what’s something really cute that one of your friends does and is totally endearing? 

omigod, there’s so many; i find almost everyone cute. one of my friends does this thing when she’s proud of herself when she looks so smug and adorable. my other friend doesn’t laugh that much, so when i make him laugh, it’s like i’ve just discovered the secrets of life. and when my friend/crush laughs, he goes pink and he scrunches his nose and i die a little bit inside. 

30: think of it: have you ever been truly scared? 

i get really scared about emotions, but i don’t think i’ve been blood-curdling scared yet. 

31: what is your opinion of socks? do you like wearing weird socks? do you sleep with socks? do you confine yourself to white sock hell? really, just talk about socks.

i love socks! i love weird socks and fuzzy socks and any socks. i try to sleep with my socks, but i remove them in the middle of the night and i don’t remember. 

32: tell us a story of something that happened to you after 3AM when you were with friends.

my cousins and i had just watched markiplier and danandphil play five nights at freddies, and we were spooked, so we started watching spongebob in the middle of the night.

33: what’s your fave pastry?

the first time i ever had a crosant with chocolate inside, i died and went to food heaven.

34: tell us about the stuffed animal you kept as a kid. what is it called? what does it look like? do you still keep it? 

i had an eeyore stuffed doll that i called doofy for some reason and i always slept with it. i had to leave it in kenya when we moved, but i’m on the hunt for another stuffed friend. 

35: do you like stationary and pretty pens and so on? do you use them often?

YES YES YES. it annoys my mom sometimes

36: which band’s sound would fit your mood right now? 

all time low’s theraphy would be my mood right now, i think.

37: do you like keeping your room messy or clean? 

clean, but sometimes, the messiness is apealing.

38: tell us about your pet peeves! 

people asking me if i’m mad when i’m just being quiet. people who are mean to teachers, complaining about them not getting grades in (70 kids, more than 100 assignments to grade, and they have a life, please just stuff it). people who gossip about other people. dramatic people. racists, mysogonists, albiests, general asses. 

39: what color do you wear the most? 

black and blue, mainly black

40: think of a piece of jewelry you own: what’s it’s story? does it have any meaning to you? 

i have a necklace that my aunt gave me a few years ago. i always wore it to feel close to her. 

41: what’s the last book you remember really, really loving?

the rosie project by graeme simsion. i got it at goodwill, and even my dad liked it. my dad very rarely likes the books i pick. 

42: do you have a favorite coffee shop? describe it! 

none yet, but there is a starbucks in our town that i’ve been to a couple of times. not only was it my first starbucks visit, but i’ve had some very good memories there. 

43: who was the last person you gazed at the stars with? 

i don’t even think i ever gazed at the stars with someone. i want to, though

44: when was the last time you remember feeling completely serene and at peace with everything? 

when we were moving and the place was quiet, and the tv was off and i’d just woken up. i sat on the couch and read and i was so calm and happy.  

45: do you trust your instincts a lot?

kinda?? i do sometimes, but i do tend to overreact and overthink, so other times i don’t.

46: tell us the worst pun you can think of.

never apollogize for your bad puns about greek gods

47: what food do you think should be banned from the universe? 

PICKLES. my god, i hate pickles so much.

48: what was your biggest fear as a kid? is it the same today? 

i was and still am scared of the dark

49: do you like buying CDs and records? what was the last one you bought?

i really like that idea, but i don’t have anything to play them on currently, so i don’t do that.

50: what’s an odd thing you collect? 

i collect clothing tags for bookmarks, but i don’t really collect things.

51: think of a person. what song do you associate with them? 

my dad. any bon jovi/rock song made in the 80s.

52: what are your favorite memes of the year so far? 

salt bae and spongebob being a chicken.

53: have you ever watched the rocky horror picture show? heathers? beetlejuice? pulp fiction? what do you think of them? 

no, not yet. i keep meaning to, but i never get round to it.

54: who’s the last person you saw with a true look of sadness on their face? 

my baby sister a few days ago. we usually leave for school at the same time, and she had to stay home because she was sick. she looked so sad when i was leaving that i could actually feel my heart break.

55: what’s the most dramatic thing you’ve ever done to prove a point?

i don’t think i’ve ever done anything dramatic.

56: what are some things you find endearing in people? 

when people laugh and it’s a full-on laugh and they very rarely do that, dimples, when people engage my stupid questions (”dragons or dinosaurs?”) and go with it, people who are okay with just sitting in the quiet but they can also stay stupid funny thins, dimples, using hands to explain things, DIMPLES

57: go listen to bohemian rhapsody. how did it make you feel? did you dramatically reenact the lyrics? 

really happy. i kept reancting lyrics and playing air guitar when it called for it. that song is fun.

58: who’s the wine mom and who’s the vodka aunt in your group of friends? why? 

i don’t really have a group of friends but i think i’d be the vodka aunt and my friend charise would be the wine mom. (sometimes it’s switched)

59: what’s your favorite myth? 

icarus and persephone and hades

60: do you like poetry? what are some of your faves?

i like it but i very rarely read it. i feel like you have to be really smart to understand poetry, and i’m not smart enough.

61: what’s the stupidest gift you’ve ever given? the stupidest one you’ve ever received? 

i gave a few of my friend nail polish, and i don’t think i’ve ever gotten a stupid gift

62: do you drink juice in the morning? which kind? 

orange juice most of the time, grape juice when i have it

63: are you fussy about your books and music? do you keep them meticulously organized or kinda leave them be? 

i leave them be most of the time. as long as they’re not getting hurt, i’m good. 

64: what color is the sky where you are right now? 

dark blue almost black

65: is there anyone you haven’t seen in a long time who you’d love to hang out with? 

i saw my cousin for the first time in MONTHS before we moved, and he’s really tall now, and he lets me cuddle him and he gives me back hugs and i miss him so much (but i’m not telling him that because he’d rub it in my face)

66: what would your ideal flower crown look like? 

small roses! peach blossoms and cherry blossoms too. one huge ass hibiscus or lotus flower as a statement piece

67: how do gloomy days where the sky is dark and the world is misty make you feel? 

cozy and sheltered, sometimes. really melancholy and silent most of the time

68: what’s winter like where you live? 

not too bad (i’ve only had one so far)

69: what are your favorite board games? 

monopoly and game of life and clue

70: have you ever used a ouija board?

no, but i knida want to??

71: what’s your favorite kind of tea? 

i don’t really have one

72: are you a person who needs to note everything down or else you’ll forget it? 

depends. if its something i care about, no. otherwise, yep

73: what are some of your worst habits? 

running away from my emotions and other people’s emotions, expecting the best out of people when i know i’m gonna get the worst

74: describe a good friend of yours without using their name or gendered pronouns.

not too loud, but very passionate. listens to a lot more rap music even though they look like a punk rock person. doesn’t look people in the eye, but looks me in the eye sometimes and makes me wanna cry. i really like him

75: tell us about your pets! 

i don't have pets!! (thanks mom)

76: is there anything you should be doing right now but aren’t? 

sleeping BUT I WILL FINISH THIS IF IT KILLS ME

77: pink or yellow lemonade? 

pink

78: are you in the minion hateclub or fanclub? 

fanclub they’re adorable

79: what’s one of the cutest things someone has ever done for you? 

making me a grilled cheese for my birthday (was my first grilled cheese)

80: what color are your bedroom walls? did you choose that color? if so, why? 

white and no. i wanna paint them tardis blue

81: describe one of your friend’s eyes using the most abstract imagery you can think of. 

the ice floating in the open sea, the color of the sky right after it’s rained

82: are/were you good in school? 

yes! i find it fun so it’s easy for me

83: what’s some of your favorite album art? 

an airplane carried me to bed by sky sailing looks really preety

84: are you planning on getting tattoos? which ones? 

i want to get slytherin in fancy font on my ankle and a semicolon on the inside of my wrist

85: do you read comics? what are your faves? 

no, but i want to 

86: do you like concept albums? which ones? 

i don’t know if i’ve heard any

87: what are some movies you think everyone should watch at least once in their lives? 

the fundamentals of caring, dead poet’s society

88: are there any artistic movements you particularly enjoy? 

i don’t really know any

89: are you close to your parents? 

yeah

90: talk about your one of you favorite cities. 

london when i was eight - warm summer days and walking to the park in the afternoon, popsicle slipping down my hand. watching cartoons with my cousins and reading in a blanket fort. merry-go-rounds and playing with sprinklers even if i’m fully dressed. going to the beach, and the day is cold and windy, the sky is grey, and it’s so beautiful my chest hurts

91: where do you plan on traveling this year? 

i wanna go to new york at some point but my parents are grade-a procrastinators and i can’t go without them

92: are you a person who drowns their pasta in cheese or a person who barely sprinkles a pinch? 

half-and-half, but more towards the barely side.

93: what’s the hairstyle you wear the most? 

braids with a right part.

94: who was the last person you know to have a birthday? 

my little cousin turned 7 a few days ago

95: what are your plans for this weekend? 

sleep and read and sleep

96: do you install your computer updates really quickly or do you procrastinate on them a lot? 

procrastination is always my situation

97: myer briggs type, zodiac sign, and hogwarts house? 

infp-t, scorpio, slytherin 

98: when’s the last time you went hiking? did you enjoy it? 

almost a year ago, not my best hiking experience. that was more about the people than the hike

99: list some songs that resonate with your soul whenever you hear them. 

for some reason, mess is mine by vance joy really makes me feel things. also, almost every single bts song i’ve ever heard

100: if you were presented with two buttons, one that allows you to go 5 years into the past, the other 5 years into the future, which one would you press? why? 

5 years in the past, with the knowledge i have know, so i can fix mistakes my over-dramatic, 10-year-old self made.

this took fifty years i swear. i tag @studiousmochi @studytherin @pinetreestudies @athenus @eintsein @educatier @elkstudies and @studylustre , and whoever wants to do this. xoxo