#HES SUPPOSED TO BE SMILING HERE!!!! WHATEVER!!!!!!!

[dark-night-hero]

Imagine getting married to Caleb ft. non-mc reader. part 2

Imagine today was the day. The day Caleb had been waitimg for. The tuxedo felt tight, but that didn't matter. He was going to marry you. The person he loved more than life itself. The person who made every moment worth fighting for.

Imagine every detail had been meticulously planned, the flowers, the vows, the reception. But none of it truly mattered now. It was all about you and the life you two would share together after your vows and ceremony.

Imagine the way Caleb stood before the mirror, his hands slightly trembling as he adjusted his tie. His thoughts consumed by the person waiting for him in the chapel. He couldn't wait to see you, to take your hand and promise forever. That was the moment he had been waiting for ever since he met you and get to know you.

and Imagine before he could gather his thoughts any further his phone buzzed with a message from you.

You: Can't want to have my forever with you. I love you! See you soon 🍎

4:37 am

Imagine the way Caleb stared at the message, a smile tugging at his lips. His heart fluttered. He was so close now. He wanted to send something back. Something that would show you how much you meant to him, how much he had been looking forward to this day. How nothing, not even his job, would ever take him away from you.

His fingers hovered over the phone's screen. He started typing but text he paused. He left like no amount of text could reflect the way he was feeling right now. So he decided to send you a voice message instead.

"Whatever happens, I love you..." He startes and hit send. He got lost in the moment that he forgot what he was about to say. Nonetheless he continued with a smile on his face. "I can't wait to marry you. No mission, no order, nothing could ever change that."

Imagine just as he was about to hit send, a sharp knock echoed through the room, cutting through his thoughts like a blade.

Imagine the way the door opens and Caleb's heart skipped a beat. It was his commanding officer, a cold, emotionless presence that made Caleb's stomach drop.

"Colonel." The Commanding officer, CO greeted, his tone calm, like they were discussing the weather, not the most important day of Caleb's life. "I see you're prepared for the ceremony." Caleb's pulse quickened. "Yes, sir. But if you'll excuse me, I need to get to the chapel. I'm getting married today."

Imagine the way the CO didn't budge, he didn't even acknowledge the significance of Caleb's words. He just stepped into the room and shut the door behind him. "Actually, that's why I'm here." Caleb frowned, the dread creeping in. "You don't seem understand, sir. I'm getting married. Today. I had my leave of absence approved today and the rest of the month, sir."

Imagine the way the CO reached into his jacket pocketa and doesn't seem to take anything that Caleb has just said and pull out a folder and flipping it open, his gaze scanning the document with clinical precision. "You've been selected for immediate deployment, Colonel. Your mission is critical. I need you ready in thirty minutes."

Imagine the way Caleb's stomach twisted. His breath caught in his throat. "What? A mission? Today? On my wedding day?" His voice cracked as his entire world tilted.

Imagine the wah the CO didn't flinch, doesn't even seemed to care about the fact that this was supposed to be the most important moment of Caleb's life. His voice remained steady and detached. "Orders are orders, Colonel. This is non negotiable. You're the only one who can handle this. I need you out of here now."

Imagine the way Caleb's mind whirled. This couldn't be happening. He felt like he was drowning. Not today. Not now.

"I'm not going." Caleb spat. His voice trembling with frustration but his eyes were locked onto the CO, his body tense. "I can't go. I won't go. I'm getting married today. I promised them. This is the day I promised- this is the day we promised. You cannot take that from me." His gaze harden. "I won't let you."

Imagine the CO's face was unreadable, but his next words were ice cold. "You'll do your duty, Colonel or I'll have you removed. You don't get to choose today."

Imagine the way Caleb's heart was hammering on his chest. He couldn't breathe. His body was shaking, not from fear but from pure desperation. He couldn't lose this. He wouldn't lose this. He wasn't just fighting for his life. He was fighting for you.

Imagine he took a deep breath, his hands shaking at his sides. His voice dropped to a low growl, full of defiance. "I'd rather be court martialed. I'd rather be discharged than miss my own wedding." His words hung in the air, raw and desperate. "I'm not going. You can’t make me."

Imagjne the way the CO's face remained stoic but Caleb could see the shift in his eyes. The soldier who had been so calm, so indifferent, was now aware. The reality of Caleb's desperation had settled into the room, but it didn't matter. The orders had been given.

Imagine the CO's voice was firm. "You will go, Colonel. You will leave. I don't care if you're in a tuxedo. You're going. If I have to drag you out, I will."

Imagine Caleb started breathing ragged. The way his chest started heaving. His vision was starting to cloud with rage, but more than that, with the fear of losing everything he had worked for. He needed to be with you. He couldn't lose you. Not like this.

Imagine Caleb's evol flared into life. The way the room seemed to shake as the force around him intensified. The walls groaned under the strain as Caleb's evol bent the space around him. The soldiers outside the door were already entering, taking position. Caleb's violet iris flickered toward them, the sheer desperation in his chest making his entire body tremble. They couldn't take this from him.

Imagine he pushed himself forward, forcing his gravity to send the soldiers flying. They crashed into the walls, but it wasn't enough. There were too many of them.

"No!" Caleb shouted. His voice cracking with the intensity of his emotions. He tried to move, to push his way through the door out of this place and get to the chapel. Get to you. His heart was pounding in his chest and the pain of not being able to reach you was unbearable.

but Imagine the soldiers weren't backing down either. One lunged forwarda and grab his arms, yanking them behind his back. Caleb twisted in the grip but the soldiers were too well trained, like it was hone to go after him. The other grabbed his legs, sweeping him off his feet. He could feel his power slipping, his energy draining but he wasn't done. He struggled with every ounce of strength, his body fighting against their hold.

"Get off me!" Caleb growled. The words barely escaping through gritted teeth. He was trying so hard. His heart was screaming for you, for the wedding, for everything he had dreamed of. But it wasn't enough.

Imagine another soldier stepped forward, and before Caleb could even react. A needle pierced his skin. He felt the cold sting of the sedative entering his bloodstream. His vision swam, his thoughts became foggy.

"No..." Caleb whispered, his body growing heavy, the power fading from his limbs. "No... You can't do this..." He started seeing black dots and it scared him. "No...! Please.... please I have to..."

Imagine as the sedative took a full effect, his words slurred, his body collapsing under the weight of the drugs. The last thing he saw was the door to the chapel, the one where the two of you went into and decided it was the way you wanted to get married and he agreed. It'll make you happy. And then he imagined you and then nothing.

Imagine not too far away from the scene was MC who stood in the hallway. Originally she was here to check on Caleb making sure everything was okay. But now, her heart breaking as she listened to the sounds of Caleb's struggle, his shouts, his desperate refusal. She could feel the intensity in the air. She knew Caleb was trying with everything he had. But it was never going to be enough.

and Imagine, more than anything. She needed to tell you that. Fast. Before everything fall apart beyond repair.

[ⓒdark-night-hero] 2025°

: everybody say- thank you for coming home caleb.

[chromehoney]

AT THE SAME DAMN TIME, chap one, chap two, chap three, chap four.

synopsis; After a messy, short-lived situationship with Stack—reckless, flirtatious, and all the wrong kinds of possessive—you swear you’re done with hood boys who can’t keep up. But when you drop something off at his mother’s store and find both Stack and his older twin brother Smoke inside, something shifts.

Two weeks passed.

Fast, but heavy.

You hadn’t seen Stack since the pool party—not in person, not online, not even on accident. Word in the group chats was that he was “back on” with Mary, whatever that meant. You didn’t care enough to ask. Not officially. But every time you slid through Ms. Moore’s shop lately, it was Smoke sitting by the register, not Stack.

And Smoke?

He’d been showing you attention like he had time to make up for. Late-night texts turned into all-day conversations. Good morning messages that sounded deeper than friendly. You found yourself laughing at your phone more than you meant to. Thinking about his hands when they brushed yours. Replaying that poolside kiss in the back of your head like a favorite song.

He didn’t move fast. But he moved with intention. Which is why it felt so weird when, today, you pulled open the beauty shop door and saw Stack behind the counter. Not Smoke. Not Ms. Moore. Him. His eyes snapped up before the bell even finished jingling.

He froze.

You stopped mid-step, but it was too late to turn around now.

He looked the same—white tee, black jeans, chain glinting under the soft yellow lights. Only difference was… his energy. He looked at you like you weren’t supposed to be there. Like you’d messed something up just by walking in.

“Oh,” you said dryly. “Didn’t know you were here.”

“Clearly,” he muttered, eyes narrowing.

You walked past him anyway, hips swaying more than usual out of spite, and headed straight to the haircare aisle just as Ms. Moore came out from the back. “My favorite girl!” she smiled, arms open. “What you doin’ back again, baby?” “Needed more of that aloe oil,” you said, hugging her. “My scalp been actin’ up.”

She nodded knowingly and handed you a jar without hesitation. You two talked for a few minutes—hair textures, protective styles, whether or not you should try copper highlights this summer. The whole time, you could feel Stack’s gaze on you from behind. He wasn’t even subtle. His jaw was tight. His hands flexed against the counter like he wanted to say something but didn’t know how to say it without cussing.

Eventually, Ms. Moore was called to the back by a client, promising she’d be back in five. You were halfway to the register when Stack finally moved.You didn’t hear his steps—you just felt him near.“So,” he started, low and rough behind you. “What’s up with you and Smoke?” You blinked. Turned halfway. “What you mean?” “I mean,” he stepped closer, “he been smilin’ lately. Textin’ all the damn time. That ain’t like him.” You crossed your arms. “You keepin’ tabs on your brother’s moods now?”

“Nah, I keep tabs on you.” That made your brow arch. You scoffed. “Go be with Mary. Mind her business instead.”He kissed his teeth hard. His hand reached out, fingers brushing your waist, warm and too familiar.

“Cut that shit out wit’ me.”

You frowned. “What—?”

“Cut that shit out,” he repeated, stepping closer, voice lower, darker. “You tryna act like I ain’t ever mean nothin’. Like you ain’t still think about me. Like you cool just givin’ that mouth to my brother.” You froze. His grip on your waist wasn’t tight—but it was there. And it was him. All over again. That same heat. That same pressure. That same familiar pull.

“Stack—”

“You think you gon’ play me to the side and play house wit’ Smoke? That what you think this is?” His voice was so close to your ear now. You could smell the mint on his breath. Could feel the jealousy sitting behind his teeth. “Touch me again and I’ma scream,” you said, soft but sharp.

He let go. But his eyes didn’t back off.

“You just gon’ throw all that away, huh?” he muttered. “For him?” You straightened your top and stepped away. “You already threw it away. I’m just finally done holdin’ it.” Stack didn’t respond. Just watched you with that same bitter grimace as you walked to the counter and rang yourself up. Ms. Moore returned just in time to hand you a sample bag and a smile.

“See you next week, baby.”

“Yup,” you said, eyes pointedly avoiding Stack’s. “Hopefully Smoke’ll be back by then.” And then you walked out. Not flinching. Not looking back. Even if your stomach was doing flips.

who yall think she gone end up wit? and don’t mind how short this shit is, i just wanted to put something out before the fourth of july andddd before my birthday since it is next week! and i ain’t gone be thinking bout writing while i do my birthday festivities! as always ignore errors.

@cursed-carmine for the dividers!

taglist for this series! @thickianaaaa @gwenda-fav @spicypiscesssss @d1gitalb4rbie @prettyisasprettydoes1306 @queenofklonnie22 @gunznroses4life @mjustag1rl @maniifesto @nikkitheunpredict @yana3sworld @katezy2x @kqmbr1a @5starsirl @bl3ssyn

[yunalinwrites]

one-on-one dance practice with abby + confession | abs saja/ur fav x idol!reader

scene summary: abby catches you late at night in the studio and helps you master your choreo. as he watches you move, he can't help but be moved himself--enough so that he can't hide his feelings for you anymore (based on this req for my ohshc-inspired series described below but can pretty much be read as a standalone. also think this could b read with any of the guys in mind, esp jinu ^o^)

series summary - saja boys' sixth member is... a girl?: in this story, you are pretending to be a boy. not just any boy--a saja boy. but what will you do when not even your fellow members--the ones you now share a dorm with--can find out you're actually a girl? stay tuned for more!! (heavily based on you're beautiful kdrama + ouran high school host club)

It was sometime in the evening, and Abs had forgotten his water bottle in the dance studio. He planned to just swing by and head back to the dorm to relax, but he was curious to find the lights to the studio still on, the floor thumping with bass notes, and the sound of rubber soles squeaking against the floor.

Pushing open the door, he found you in front of the floor-to-ceiling mirrors, snapping your body to the song you had all been practicing earlier that day. Other than morning rehearsal, it was supposed to be your guys’ day off. But, based on your disheveled hair and empty water bottle next to his, he could tell you'd been here for hours since.

Your work seemed to have paid off; you looked amazing, hitting every move powerfully yet gracefully. Well, for the most part. The second you heard the beat signifying Abs’ verse, your foot gets caught on your other ankle, causing you to lose balance and land flat on your ass with a thud.

“Dammit,” you mutter, lying back on the floor and spreading your limbs like a starfish. 

You take in the cool feeling of the lacquered wood panels against your sweaty skin, using one of your forearms to shield your eyes from the fluorescent lights above you.

“Still here?” a familiar deep voice asks you.

You laugh, exasperated, lifting your arm to peek at the familiar head of pink hair hovering over you before covering your face back up out of shame. “Please tell me you didn't see that.”

“Oh, don't worry, I didn't,” he jokes. “Definitely didn't see you put our choreographer to shame. All I saw was the part where you ate total shit.”

You roll over onto your stomach, smushing your cheek on the floor. “Ugh…” you groan.

“Hey, come on, the floor's dirty,” he scolds.

“Whatever. My shirt’s holding more sweat and stink than this floor has ever felt,” you contest.

“I ever tell you about the time Derpy pissed on my sneakers right before I walked in here?”

You shoot up immediately. “Abby! Gross!”

“I’m just playing with you,” he chuckles, crouching next to you. He unscrews his water bottle and passes it to you. “Here, since you lost so much sweating.”

You grab the bottle with a smirk and take a sip. When you wipe your mouth, he extends out his hand. 

“What’s got you--the second verse?” he asks, his speech not even the slightest bit strained as he pulls you up with ease.

ou brush yourself off. “Yeah, I don't know. The footwork is tripping me up. Literally. Keep mixing it up with the sequence at the beginning…”

“Maybe get some rest,” he suggests. “You seem tired. There’s always tomorrow.”

“No!” you refuse sharply, not meaning to sound so harsh. “It's gonna keep me up if I don't get this right.”

“Plus,” you add, less bite this time, “Gwi-Ma's gonna, like, trap me in here if he sees me mess it up tomorrow morning.”

It's supposed to be funny, but even you have to force a smile at what is, at the end of the day, the truth. He knows this too, and his signature smirk is nowhere to be found. His brows furrow at the thought of you overexerting yourself.

“Fine,” he concedes, patting your shoulder. “But you're gonna let me help you.”

The next hour proves to be unexpectedly tense. It's quiet; instead of playing the track on the speaker, he sings it for you at a slower tempo, allowing you to break down the moves while he emphasizes the syllables on the downbeats. 

Occasionally, he’ll stop to demonstrate the moves. Other times, it'll be to adjust your body. “It's more like this,” he'll say, gently pulling your arms or pushing your legs into place.

Soon enough, he goes from clapping the beat to keep you on tempo to applauding you with a spreading smile on his face.

“There you go,” he praises. Crossing his arms, he lets out another praise under his breath: "That's my girl..."

You're too busy celebrating to catch that last part.

“Ugh, yes! Finally” you cheer, jumping up and down. “W-woah…”

On your way down from another celebratory hop, you had landed weirdly and lost your balance. Before you can reconvene with the ground, you feel something--someone--sturdy wrap around you. 

Abby was a good few feet beside you with his arms crossed, so you don't even register that he's behind you until you see him holding you up by your underarms, his forearms bulging in the mirror as they cross over your chest.

You laugh nervously. “Sorry.”

“Don’t worry about it,” he tells you, taking a step back after helping you to your feet. “I'm… really proud of you.”

“Thanks,” you reply sheepishly, staring at your sneakers to try and hide your blush.

A large outstretched palm enters your vision. You look up at him.

“Call it a night?” he offers, his eyes seeming to plead with you.

You bite your cheek, considering it for a moment--not so much tempted by relaxation as you are by the opportunity to walk home with him. 

“I…”

But, before you can surrender, you hear the echo of Gwi-Ma's voice in your head.

“I should probably try it to the music…”

You don't mention his name, but Abby acknowledges what you really mean with a solemn expression.

“You don't have to wait up on me,” you assure him.

“No,” he says firmly. “I'm staying.”

You smile. “Suit yourself.”

With a stretch of your back towards the ceiling and a long yawn, you turn on the speaker.

You've barely even gotten into position, but Abby is already watching you with awe. As the music crescendos, you're moving in time with the music with a confidence he couldn't even dream of. Your productless hair is sticking to itself and flopping everywhere, your stupid Saja Boys T-Shirt drowns your body, and you're covered in so much sweat that if it weren't for the smell, it was as if you'd just showered. But to Abby, it's the most beautiful show he's ever seen. It's a thousand times more elegant than any show of tutus and tippy toes you could offer him, and he never wants anyone else to see it.

When the song comes to a quiet, you're panting like a dog, but Abby is completely breathless. Not just in wonder, but something else--something unexpectedly bitter against the sweetness of the sight that puts a pit in his stomach.

You find his eyes in the reflection of the mirror and wait for him to say something, but he doesn't. He just stares at you with an expression you can't quite place–something between admiration and devastation. 

“Abby…?”

You had shown him a perfect demonstration of muscle memory. It made sense–he'd seen the effort to build those reflexes with his very own eyes. But the way he approaches you–the way he grabs you by your waist and turns you to face him–has no such business feeling as familiar as it does. Even so, it can't help but come so naturally to lean into each other.

“Should--Should I do it again…?” you stutter, feeling yourself heat up underneath his touch.

He shakes his head, but there's still something sad in his eyes.

“Did I… do something… wrong?” you ask him.

“No, you… you're perfect. Just… keeping looking at me…”

His hands move upward, cradling your jaw as he leans his face closer to yours. His eyes flicker to your lips--his own just centimeters away–silently asking, begging for permission.

Even when you feel his warm breath ghost over you, your body shows no signs of protest; your eyelids are already drifting shut in expectation. But, albeit weakly, you still resist, not out of aversion but disbelief. “This isn't part of the choreo…”

"It's not,” he affirms.

“Then… what are you…”

His whole career flashes before his eyes–a career that he'd been able to keep because of his precise control over his muscles. The entirety of this painstaking job relied on his ability to puppet every part of himself like a marionette, pulling the strings of his calves to the beat, sucking in his six-pack for the camera, making his vocal cords hit frequencies with all but the mercy of a lozenge. But right now, in this moment, he can't maneuver even a single cell in his body to stop himself--not even the parts of him that know it's selfish, that it's rumors and scandals with your career on the line, too.

That withstanding, “I'm sorry,” is all he can whisper in reparations before he's crashing his lips onto yours.

It's so hungry--so depraved; you're melding against each other so desperately. It's the first time between the two of you, but the way you're pulling him closer by his shirt and he's backing you up against the mirror with his arms around the small of your back--you're savoring each other like it's your last; there's a mutual understanding that it very well could be.

There's another mutual understanding: the both of you have decided there's no need for air or water or food--just the other needing you. Nothing–not even your own lungs’ urgency for oxygen–can separate the two of you. Though, gravity makes a good attempt at it.

Just before you reach the wall with your back, you feel something round underneath your heel. You quickly pull away from him, almost slipping on the plastic crunching beneath you. Instinctively, you throw your hands around his neck as he tightens his hold around your waist.

The both of you catch your breath in heavy synchronised pants. You're still staring at the ground, where the empty plastic bottle had so rudely interrupted you. 

“Look at me,” he tells you.

You realize you've spent the last few hours doing everything he said and wanted and yet, now that you were out of the moment, you couldn't bring yourself to do even that. Not with the way your cheeks were burning.

He grabs your chin and forces your gaze towards him. “Y/N.”

“We'll get in trouble if we're not back at the dorm soon,” you utter, but it's not necessarily a contest–it’s really nothing more than a statement with the way you're staring at his lips.

He brushes his thumb over your bottom lip. “Y/N, if you’d let me–”

“Yes. Whatever it is, yes. Just do it. Make it quick,” you interject eagerly, pulling him closer.

He can't help but laugh, sending a rumble through both of you. “No, really, listen–Hear me out.”

“What is there to hear out about you?” you try joking, but your smile drops a bit at his uncharacteristic seriousness.

Gazing deeply into your eyes, he reaches around his neck and grabs your hand, holding it to his beating heart. 

“I… I promise to protect you,” he tells you earnestly. “I don’t care about the fans. I don't care about any other godforsaken demon in the underworld. I don't even care what Gwi-Ma might do.”

He squeezes your hand tighter. “If anything--anyone tries to hurt you…”

“I promise I…” 

He trails off, not even wanting to fathom the thought of something happening to you. Your eyes soften. He never finishes his sentence, but it isn't any less convincing. He pulls you closer into a hug, his mouth right by your ear.

“I know you don't need me. But I…”

He takes a shuddered deep breath.

“I need to be by your side…”

Pulling back, he holds your face and brings your foreheads together.

“Please. Let me be the one to catch you when you fall,” he whispers.

You bring your hands to cup his jaw. “Abby, that’s…”

Just as quickly, though, one of them leaves to cup your mouth. “...that's so corny,” you laugh.

He smirks. “Yeah, but it's working. I can feel you falling for me right now.”

He tries pulling you up towards him, but you push his face away playfully. “That's me slumping because I'm so tired of you.”

“Ah! Abby!” You swat at his chest as, before you know it, he's lifting you bridal-style.

He gives you a swift peck. “You don't mean that.”

“I don't,” you giggle.

As he carries you out through the door, you let your head rest on his shoulder, giving him the perfect position to plant another quick kiss on your forehead. It's the first time you're seeing outside of the dance studio in more than eight hours, an unfortunate reality for the both of you.

Placing your hand back on his heart, you say one more thing before letting your exhaustion take over.

“Abby?” you whisper.

“Yeah?”

“I promise to protect you, too.”

***

this pacing kinda stinks now that i read it all together im sorry im a first draft warrior always </3

i have other ideas in mind for one-on-one rehearsal + confession for the other guys but i thought id upload this one first to give myself a bit of time cuz i can already feel myself burning out LMAO

but can u tell abs is a veryyyy close second fav to jinu :3 sometimes I think I like him better...

masterlist

tags (open ^o^): @hornehlittleweeblet2 @foxta1l @prettylittlelavvy @ch1cky-093 @thoughtsfrom1985 @feelya @doodle-with-rhy @fries11 @katzline @iivantablackii @mysteris-things @maybeethan69

[aninipanin1]

𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄 𝐈𝐍 𝐌𝐀𝐃𝐑𝐈𝐃

Synopsis: In which, everyone thinks you and Itoshi Sae are dating. Or are you two really?

Notes: Kinda considering doing this with other players, specifically the NG11 players. hehehe. Anyways, enjoy this because Sae has been rotting in my mind lately. P.S. This fic is supposed to be longer, but I couldn't stretch it anymore cause my phone started lagging due to how much the word count was lol

"Hello, Madrid!"

A whispery greeting left your lips the moment you left the confines of the aeroplane. The airport was packed with people from foreigners like yourself to citizens of the country, awaiting family members or friends coming.

It was definitely chaotic, but the sense of adventure at coming to a different country and learning something new about the sports you were in love with.

It had been a week since the end of the Neo Egoist League, and Ego decided that the best way for you to spend your vacation time whilst learning is to head to Spain where you would be spending time with a supposed someone who will help you better.

Now, who that someone was is a mystery to you. All Anri said in the letter was that the person will 'meet you there.' Whatever there meant.

Sitting in the waiting area of the airport, you looked around in hopes of finding somewhere you could eat due to your stomach grumbling loudly. Stacking all of your bags on top of your luggage, you were about to head out when you hear a familiar voice call your name.

"Y/n."

"Sae-san? What are you doing here?!"

You turned around in shock seeing the redhead midfielder standing there, wearing a simple button-up shirt, slacks, and a mask.

Relieved and excited to see a familiar face, you ran up to him and bowed politely, giving him a cheerful smile.

"It's been a while since we last saw each other! Again, why are you here? Are you going for a flight too?"

"No. Did Ego not tell you?"

"Tell me what?"

"I'll be the one helping you."

You blinked once and then twice, trying to take in the information. Your blank expression is also turning Sae confused. Wait, he meant that the supposed mentor you would be learning from is THE Itoshi Sae?!

"I...oh...I didn't expect...that."

Unbeknownst to you, the look on your face made Sae a little worried. Wait, were you disappointed that it was him? You sound like it. What if you were? Surely, you weren't. If you were, that would hurt him he won't lie.

After all, he may or may not have celebrated when Ego called him to tell him about the Blue Lock Director's plan for you.

Yeah, no, he definitely did not jump up like a weirdo from his couch when the phone call ended. Nope, no one saw that, so it means it never happened.

In your eyes, though, Sae still looked the same. Straight and poker face as if nothing changed, though if you only tried to look deeper in his emerald eyes, then maybe you would have seen the complicated doubts he had.

"Anyways though, thank you for accepting me, Sae-san. I know you are really busy, but I'm really excited about our time together!"

He nods his head before picking up all your bags in his hold, to which you were about to protest, but he only gave you a look. One that is not his usual glare, a little softer than that, but hard enough to tell you that any arguments would not be taken into consideration.

"Let's go. Have you eaten yet?"

"Uh no...I was just about to."

"Then let's eat somewhere. Not here, though. There are better food outside the airport."

Holding your luggage in one arm while gripping your wrist on the other, he guided you through the crowd of people like a professional as if he was used to doing it.

Well, he probably was considering he is very popular and crowds are something you have to learn how to interact with as someone famous.

Outside the airport awaited black car that someone rented for you and Sae. He said that it was to avoid the discomfort of changing vehicles.

"Go in. I'll take care of your luggages."

"Huh? Oh no no! I can help-"

"You look tired from the jet lag, just let me."

The redhead opened the door to the car for you, nudging his head, signalling you to enter the car. Feeling the pressure of Sae's teal eyes looking at you, you just obeyed and entered the car before watching him put your luggage on the back as if it didn't weight anything.

"Let's go. We'll just eat somewhere close to your hotel. Its a bit far from here, so you can rest in the meantime."

He sat beside you, giving a small nod to the driver who started the car. You nodded at his suggestion.

Though, throughout the ride, you never did sleep too busy looking out the window like a child. The streets looked alien in your eyes, from the architecture to the people. Everything made you even more excited to stay in the city.

Meanwhile, Sae could only watch from beside you with a softer than normal look. The way your head moved from right to left every once in a while due to something catching your attention made him feel some type of giddiness in his stomach.

God, you were just adorable.

"There are better places for sightseeing, we can always visit if you want."

"Really?! Eh...but aren't you busy?"

"I can always find a day where I'm free. I'll be fine."

He pat your head once before retracting it the moment he realized what he just did, turning his head on the window beside him with pink cheeks.

You were not fairing any better as you feel your cheeks heat up at the sudden and unexpected gesture from the redhead, copying his move and trying to focus your mind on the sights outside instead.

Meanwhile, the driver found himself chuckling softly, shaking his head at the display he saw when he decided to peek at the rearview mirror.

Young love really is just as awkward and bright as he remembered it.

"The bed is so soft... I'll definitely miss it once I come back to Japan."

A soft frown escaped your lips as you stood up from the messy bed of the hotel to prepare for the day. It had been two days ever since you arrived in Spain, and it had been good so far.

The place was very beautiful, and you were in awe about how drastically different it was than Japan. It was a bit hot during this time. You won't lie, but it was not something you could not handle.

However, you were more focused on today's agenda. Sae told you he will be free today, and so, the training you were supposed to be undergoing will commence today.

For the past few days, you wondered what type of training it was. Was it something related to the fact you were once a midfielder and Sae is one currently? Because that was the only thing you have in common with Sae that you could think of.

"Whatever, I trust Sae-san! He won't let me down!"

After an hour or so of preparing for the day, you hear your phone ping signalling that someone messaged you.

Sae:

I'm at the lobby of your hotel.

'Wha...He didn't even tell me when he was about to head out. Classic Sae-san...'

You sweatdropped at his message. Thankfully, you dressed up early, or else you might have made him wait for a long time.

Heading down on the elevator, you headed to the large and luxurious lobby where you saw a familiar mop of redhead. For someone who is going to a football field and possibly going to be running around, he was dressed up pretty nicely.

Hair tidy, shirt crisp as if an iron just ran through them a few minutes ago, face weirdly calm as he typed away something on his phone.

He looked awfully handsome, and well, it should not be a surprise, but it was to someone like you who never paid much attention to people's looks.

"Sae-san, good morning! I'm ready to go..."

"Good. Let's get going, we have a tight schedule today."

The day was eventful, to say the least.

For your first stop, Sae took you to a nearby park where he made you watch, analyze, and predict how a group of kids' play will go.

It was surprisingly interesting, seeing as kids were blank slates. No coaching, no rules, just their creativity and basic knowledge of the sport. It was adorable and albeit difficult on your part.

After that, he brought you to a part of the park where he made you play with the ball alongside him. He did the trickiest types of lobs and dribbling before making you catch it with your foot.

For someone who has not played a while, you definitely lacked the stamina and skills to play like you used to.

"As a manager, you should be in tune with what your players may be feeling or experiencing in the pitch. If you can't do that, then you'd ruin the flow of the game. That's why we're playing."

By the end of the first two hours or so, you were already out of breath from all the movements, while the midfielder was not even close to sweating waterfalls like you were.

"C'mon. I'll walk you to your hotel so you can clean up. It's time to eat lunch anyway."

"S-sure...thank you."

With one final deep breath, you picked up your bag and started to follow him back to the hotel. You won't lie, Madrid was a beautiful city, the architecture of the houses is certainly a little different from the ones in Japan.

It did not come to your mind that you might look like a newborn child with how you ogled at everything. Panning your head from left to right, and sometimes even double taking at something that caught your attention.

"Don't get too distracted."

You felt a hand grab your hand, larger fingers gripping your smaller palms as Sae led you through the streets, pulling you away from bumping into people.

Heat rushed through your face at the sudden touch. From how you knew the man, he was not the type to be touchy with anyone no matter who they are and how close they were to him (you would know from Rin's rants).

So where did the sudden hand holding come from? Putting your other hand on your face was enough of a reaction to tell anyone paying attention to you that you did not want anyone seeing your flustered face.

Sae was not safe from this as well. He was as cool and suave as he always was, but inside, he was still a teen that don't have much of a grasp on his hormones and feelings.

With his back turned to you, he felt a little safer from anyone seeing the pink on his cheeks-

Ah, no. He definitely was not blushing. He isn't weak like that.

'I'm just holding her hand. It's not a big deal. Yeah, it isn't a big deal.'

With the crowded city and the maelstorm of feelings, even someone as cautious as Itoshi Sae missed the few sounds of a camera clicking.

"Thank you for taking me here, Sae-san! The food was delicious."

"You don't have to keep thanking me. It's just right to do these things."

He shrugged, taking a sip off his drink. Looking down at the finished plates in front of you two, your mind wandered to try and make everything less awkward.

What starter conversation should you go for? Hmm...

"Did Ego-san approach you to help me with the training?"

"Yes. Though I didn't see the downside of not doing it. I'd benefit from it, too, anyway."

"Benefit you? Why is that...?"

"It's not confirmed yet, so I can't tell you."

You nodded, confused at the mystery he left you with. What did he mean it would benefit him, too? It's not like he will be playing for Japan in the U20 World Cup-

Oh.

Oh, now you felt stupid for not thinking about it immediately. Though, you decided not to tell him about your thoughts to avoid serious conversations on something that has a possibility of not happening.

"But anyways... I enjoyed today! It was really refreshing to play again after so long. I realized how much I missed playing and to even play alongside someone who is a genius like you!"

Sae nodded at that, though you saw the very small twitch that left his eye when you said the word genius.

Wait, did he not like it when someone called him a genius? Did you indirectly insult him? Oh no.

"Uh...sorry if I...offended you."

"No, no. It's my fault for being rude. I know you were complimenting me, and I feel happy with it."

Aww, now the conversation was ruined because of you. Well, at least that was what ran in both your and Sae's minds. Blaming each other for something so trivial.

"No, I understand that some people may not like it when people call them a genius. I can't begin to imagine how the press, especially from Japan spinning this narrative of you being this talented, like you were some type of sports hero, may make the pressure on you heavier."

An unnoticeable twitch in the corner of his lips went past you as he just sighed. He rests his head on his palm, he looked out the window beside you both at the busy afternoon streets.

"Like I said, it's fine. Besides, the reason why I distaste the word genius in context to me is that it's just not factual. I'm not a genius. I make plays not out of luck, talent, or whatever those born with advantages have. I play smarter than that, and idiots like the media would disregard hard work in order to spin whatever narrative they want just to get more clicks."

Jade eyes wavered under the sunlight that poured from the glass window. Sae may look calm and collected, but you know that there must be some sort of tension brewing from his heart.

"You're the farthest away from someone who does not work hard, Sae-san! You have been playing since you were a kid, and the years you developed playing is a huge contribution as to why you are where you are today."

The conversation came back after that, saved by both of your willingness (mostly yours) to get over awkward moments. As you were both busy with talking, you didn't notice the few people that recognized not just Sae, but also you.

"Oh, is that Itoshi Sae? What is he doing here?"

"Yeah, but what about her? Isn't she the Blue Lock manager? Why is she here in Spain?"

"Are they on a date? They look way too close to just be hanging out."

"You don't know. They might be just friends. But, if they are on a date, then they might actually be a real power couple."

Those who recognized you both kept to themselves, though, whispering to their friends about what they thought your relationship was, yet thankfully knowing their boundaries.

If only those things can be said to a certain few hiding behind the facade of just a passerby, yet was already writing on their heads about possible headlines and tabloid articles about this.

"What the fuck is this?"

"Um...this was posted last night, Ego-san." Anri said nervously as she showed the man the posts. Yes, she was a little surprised about it, and that was it, but she knew this misunderstanding could lead to best case scenario, a little scolding from the JFU or worse, being fired.

Ego, on the other hand, shook his head. He knew he should not have trusted that kid. Does he not care about your future in the football scene? This scandal can blow your damn career, seeing as you were the less popular one in this situation hence you were open for not just criticism but control from some unwanted people.

"Ego-san...you don't think that the JFU will fire her-"

"No, they won't, you idiot. Knowing them, they are probably foaming at the mouth with this news, especially that fat dumbass."

Now, Anri was confused. Why would the executives want a scandal like this? Now, for her, if you and Sae were indeed dating, it wasn't much of a problem. But to some fans, especially some rabid fangirls? Yes, it definitely will be.

And that would spell less sales for Blue Lock, or just having some people review bomb the project with negative comments just for this.

"Why would they want this, Ego-san?"

"Don't you see? Itoshi Sae is a talent the JFU has wanted in their hands for some time now, seeing as he's the young face of Japanese football in the world. So to see him be interested and close to a worker of theirs like Y/n, they can turn around and use her for their own greed. Even worse, they'd make a big deal out of this scandal and profit out of it. Just from the reaction in this one post alone, its telling that people are turning heads at this drama."

"Oh... you're right. Adding to that, we have less of a say to her career compared to the players. This is a disaster waiting to happen."

Ego just rolled his eyes at the news before turning back to what he was doing. Whatever, he trusted you enough to know what to say or do when the time comes and what he predicted will turn out to be true.

Though kids these days really do go around romancing early. This is why he doesn't have any kids.

Meanwhile, all across Japan, the news just started trending, and a few eyes saw the post and needless to say, they weren't happy at all.

"Itoshi Sae?! What the fuck?!"

Isagi screamed from the hotel he was in, even accidentally hitting the back on his head on the bed post which made him yelp in pain.

"Wait, that means Y/n-chan is here?! In Spain, too? Maybe I should visit her...but still! She can't be dating him! No!"

In denial, he was as he scrolled obsessively through the comment section of the post.

"No way! No! This is a nightmare!"

Then the pings on his messaging app started. It was from the Blue Locker's groupchat.

As seen by the reaction from the other Itoshi brother in the messages, Rin felt like all of the progress he had from the meditation that Ego made him do has now vanished into thin air the moment he opened his phone.

Maybe the elders were right, it is that damn phone as he nearly crushed the poor gadget in his hand as he read more and more news about ut from different social media platforms.

It did not help that Otoya's comment made him shudder in disgust. Hell no, if someone was going to be your brother in law, that would be Sae, not him.

He was the better brother anyway! If you're going to take the Itoshi last name, then you'll have it because of him, not and NEVER because of Sae.

"Stupid brother, can't even keep his hands to himself. I was with her first."

In another part of Japan, Bachira had the largest frown ever present on his face as he saw the positive comments about you and Sae, saying that if it were ever true, you two will be one, if not the greatest couple that ever touched the sports which made him feel moee insecure than jealous.

Of course you'll like Sae. He was successful at such a young age, with so many accolades and fans adoring him because of who he is.

That was something Bachira could only wish to achieve. He was just starting to get recognition for his talents after all, and it felt like because of this, you were even farther away from him than before.

"Bachira-san! Let's play again!"

He felt the tugs on his shirt, as the kids from the kindergarten jumped up and down, a ball in one's hand as they pointed back to the grassy part of the school.

Putting the best smile on his face, he jumped along with them in excitement.

"Yeah! Let's do it! Last one not on the field has a rotten egg!"

In the Mikage estate, Reo found himself obsessively scrolling on his socials instead of the plays of his fellow Blue Lockers to study.

Its not that he was obsessed over his phone or anything, no he prided in himself on having total control over himself.

Well, except for a few things.

He just could not help but scroll and reload his page, hoping and praying that there is a confirmation from any reliable source about the speculated relationship between you and Sae.

A confirmation that you two, indeed, were just friends and nothing more.

He was nervous. He already lost a friend, he can't lose someone again. And he knows its not comparable at all, Nagi is a friend and you were someone he admired from afar.

But, the nights where you'd find him rolled up in himself due to anxiety, times where even if everyone turned their backs on him, you didn't, it made him hope.

Hope that he can build something between you two. That he wasn't the only one who felt safe and sound around you.

He just did not expect that his time would run out just like that, oh so fast.

On the other side of the world, Michael Kaiser found himself still adjusting to the jetlag of travelling. It had only been 3 days ago since he arrived back in Germany, and well, his sleeping schedule was a little torn apart due to being used to the timezone of Japan.

So he just jumped on the couch nearby and grabbed his phone, and started scrolling in hopes that he's find something worth entertaining him.

There wasn't much that caught his attention until he scrolled to a video with a title that made him stand up from his place.

'Real Madrid's Itoshi Sae and Blue Lock Manager, Y/, L/n, caught dating?'

"What in the actual fuck..."

He wasn't one to watch gossip videos. No, he hates and dont care about them. He doesn't give a shit about what is going on in other people's lives.

But this? Oh, you know he's paying attention.

The first half of the video was boring as hell. It just talked about who you and Sae were. Only halfway through the video did the reporter finally start to talk about the pictures caught of you and Sae around Madrid.

From sitting on benches next to each other, walking hand to hand around the city, to even eating lunch together, the proximity between you two was suspiciously less on the platonic side but leaning towards something more.

By the time the video ended, he did not even notice that he was clenching his fist so tight, moon-like marks already appeared on his palms.

A bitter chuckle left his mouth as he ran his hand through his hair, eyebrows furrowed in a mix of emotions.

"You're ruining me here, häschen."

ADDITIONAL TIME:

"What?! Eh, please calm down-"

"NO! PLEASE! PLEASE TELL US YOU ARENT DATING THAT GUY!"

You don't know what the hell happened for you to be welcomed in the Blue Lock facility once more with most of the boys begging you to confirm that you were still single.

Bachira was clinging to one arm while Shidou clung to the other, as the rest of the boys crowded you, also wanting to hear your side.

"Did he threaten you?! Did he bribe you?! Please tell us you didnt sell our secrets."

"Why would I do that?! And I wasn't dating Sae-san! He was just kind enough to help me train and get through Madrid since it is a foreign country, after all."

A collective sigh of relief was let out from the boys as they all finally calmed down on the interrogation. A smile lit up on your face, thinking that all the commotion was finally solved when Anri revealed herself with a tight smile.

"The PR team wanted to have a talk with you, Y/n-chan..."

She looked nervous, like she didn't want to tell you about it. You paled though, you knew how strict the PR team were when it came to scandals and this misunderstanding (that you found out about just now) was all over the internet!

Oh, dear you are about to get the scolding of a lifetime.

And just as if your luck did not smite you enough, you looked at your phone to see that there were hundreds of missed calls from many different players. Some from your friends from your old school, to some players in the NEL before like Charles, Loki, Lorenzo and Ness.

But most of all, the one with the most calls and text with a whopping 25 missed calls and 32 messages was the Emperor himself: Michael Kaiser.

"Oh dear...what did I get myself into."

Meanwhile, on the other side of the planet, a small smirk can only appear at the corners of Sae's lips when he sees the tabloids.

He felt bad, bad that he was actually enjoying this while you are probably scrambling around trying to explain to everyone that it was just a misunderstanding.

Looking out the view from his apartment, he sighed at the night sky, feeling like a stupid kid wishing for a fairytale love story of some sort as if he didn't know what the reality was.

"I promise, Y/n...in the near future, we'll have to explain to those stupid paparazzi's that it is not just a misunderstanding anymore."

Blue Lock is WRITTEN by Kaneshiro Muneyuki and ILLUSTRATED by Nomura Yusuke. All credits to the both of them.

[biscuits-and-gracie]

Psych 101

summary: What in the preschool hell…? characters: frat boy! rafe. elementary ed! reader warnings: mentions of drinking and vape word count: 936

Rafe Cameron didn’t believe in 8 a.m. classes.

But here he was, sunglasses still on despite the overcast sky, slumping into the very back row of Psych 101 with a protein bar in one hand and a vape in the other, hair still smelling like a bonfire from last night’s mixer. His frat brothers would’ve laughed if they saw him now-half-awake, eyelids heavy, hoodie wrinkled from the night before. Psychology was supposed to be an easy gen-ed elective. Something he could breeze through between tailgates and Thursday-night keggers.

He was busy scrolling through Snapchat stories, tapping past blurry pictures of beer pong and girls in tight dresses, when he saw her.

Front row.

Dead center.

Her hair was pulled back in a neat little ponytail, and she was wearing a headband that-he blinked-looked like a yellow No. 2 pencil. A literal pencil. Her backpack had little apple pins on it. Her laptop was covered in cheerful stickers: Teach. Inspire. Grow. and I love recess.

Rafe’s brows knit slightly under his shades. What in the preschool hell…?

She was talking to the professor-smiling, laughing a little, animated-and when she sat back down, she pulled out a spiral notebook with Miss Y/L/N written on the front in bubble letters. A highlighter in one hand. A coffee cup with “Future Favorite Teacher” in glitter on the side in the other.

Rafe tilted his head slightly. He wasn’t used to this kind of girl.

She didn’t look like someone who knew how to shotgun a beer. She wasn’t dressed like she was trying to get invited to post-game. She wasn’t flirting or fishing for attention. She was completely absorbed in whatever she was reading, highlighting every other line like it actually mattered.

He didn’t even realize he was staring until she glanced back to grab something from her bag, and their eyes locked for half a second.

She blinked. Smiled politely. Then turned back around.

That was it. No blush. No giggle. No twirling her hair like the girls at his parties. Just a soft, sunshine-y sort of smile like she didn’t even know who he was.

And for some reason, that threw him off more than anything.

He leaned back in his seat, slowly lowering his sunglasses as his eyes drifted down to the pencil headband again. She’s gotta be kidding. But she wasn’t.

Class began. The professor started lecturing about human behavior and childhood development, and Rafe, shockingly, didn’t pull his phone out again. He watched her take notes with meticulous care, mouthing little phrases under her breath, eyebrows furrowed in concentration.

He didn’t know why he couldn’t look away.

Maybe it was the way she was so sure of herself in a way that didn’t require attention. Maybe it was how she seemed like she actually wanted to be there. Or maybe it was the way her headband kept slipping slightly to one side, and she pushed it back up without a thought like she did it every morning.

Rafe had met a hundred girls on this campus. Maybe more. But something about her made him want to stay a little longer after class.

So, for the first time since syllabus week, Rafe Cameron sat through the entire fifty-minute lecture without texting a single person.

And as she packed up her things and walked out with a bounce in her step, headband still proudly in place, he mumbled to himself with a crooked grin:

“…What the hell.”

[destieltropecollection]

Destiel Trope Collection - Day 1: Angst With A Happy Ending

Darling, in any life (WIP) | @keiro (ao3 username) Rating: Explicit Word Count: 27,810 Main Tags/Warnings: post canon, endverse castiel, human castiel, dom/sub undertones, bottom dean/top castiel, castiel has ptsd, touch starved dean winchester Summary: “You better kill me now!” Dean screams. Lucifer turns back. “Pardon?” “You better kill me now. Or I swear, I will find a way to kill you. And I won't stop.” “I know you won't. I know you won't say yes to Michael, either. And I know you won't kill Sam." Lucifer takes a step closer, briefly looking around the graveyard. “Whatever you do, you will always end up here. Whatever choices you make, whatever details you alter, we will always end up—here. I win. So, I win.” Dean shakes his head, holding back his rage. “You're wrong.” Lucifer smiles. “See you in five years, Dean.” . Ten years later, right after blacking out on that rebar, Dean wakes up in a dusty, rotten hotel room. It doesn’t take him too long to find out that he's in what looked like 2014, but not the 2014 he lived in. It’s the 2014 that’s not supposed to exist.

Copper Roses | @teeparadigm67 Rating: Explicit Word Count: 45,942 Main Tags/Warnings: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Hanahaki Disease, Love Confessions, Curse Breaking, Themes of Terminal Illnesses, Angst with Happy Ending, Eventual Smut, Skipable smut Summary: Dean is sick. Has been sick for a few days – ever since they came off their last hunt – and all looks hopelessly bleak as more blood-soaked petals clog his airways. Hanahaki disease is a deadly curse that sees flowers grow and bloom inside a person whose heart is filled with a romantic love for another and the only way to cure it is to have that love returned to them. But Dean is adamant that this person doesn’t love him back and he refuses to speak their name. If Castiel’s words would impact his condition he would say them loud and proud every day, but that's impossible. There is no way Dean could be in love with a broken-fallen angel. He wishes he was the one who contracted the wretched curse just to take away Dean’s burden, he can't stand watching the man he loves wither and die right before his eyes and will do whatever it takes to see Dean get that cure, even if it means breaking his own heart in the process.

Filing Off the Serial Numbers | @WhoIPretended2b Rating: Mature Word Count: 41,878 Main Tags/Warnings: Slow Burn, Mutual Pining, Alternate Universe - College/University, Fluff and Angst, Happy Ending, Angst with a Happy Ending, Characters Reading Fanfiction, Characters Writing Fanfiction, Fanfiction Writer Dean Winchester, Fanfiction Writer Castiel, Academic Rivals to Lovers, Charlie Bradbury & Castiel Friendship, Castiel & Meg Friendship, Mental Health Issues, Charlie Bradbury & Castiel are Roommates, Enemies to Lovers Summary: Castiel Shurley doesn’t understand why an engineering major keeps showing up in his upper-level creative writing classes. He knows part of having a liberal arts education is taking things outside of your major, but who takes 400-level English courses for fun? And even more galling, his classmates keep gushing about his short stories. You would think Dean Winchester is the next Isaac Asimov. Then Castiel finally gets assigned to peer edit one of Dean’s short stories… and he recognizes it. To be fair, it’s a great story. Too bad Dean didn’t write it. He stole it—lifted straight from a fanfic, with the serial numbers barely filed off.

Rebirth | @thisisapaige Rating: Teen & Up Word Count: 24,218 Main Tags/Warnings: Alternate Universe - Fantasy, Creature Castiel, Angst with a Happy Ending, Nature Magic Animal Death (it's a mercy killing), Grief/Mourning , Fire, Enemies to Friends to Lovers (the enemies is short lived), Pining Summary: The Lawrence villagers say that there's something in the woods somewhere. Something big. Something scary. Something that will swallow your children whole if they venture inside. No one who goes in comes back out. Mary Winchester builds her farm at the edge of the woods to raise her two sons. Her youngest, Sam Winchester, born with weak lungs, always stares into the trees. It's as if it's calling him. Not long after Mary succumbs to the fever ravaging through the village, Sam walks into the woods and disappears. Dean grieves the loss of his family. Suffering the same illness that took his mother, Dean hears a scream on a dark winter's night. It's a scream he cannot ignore. He runs into the trees to investigate. Something is watching Dean. He can feel it. The creature is coming for him. Dean expects to die, expects to be eaten, expects to become one of the cautionary tales exchanged by the villagers. But Castiel, the creature of the woods, is nothing like Dean's expectations.

Phantasma | @thisisapaige Rating: Explicit Word Count: 30,934 Main Tags/Warnings: Alternate Canon, Angst with a Happy Ending, Pining, Strangers to Lovers, Stanford Era, Ghost Castiel, Hunter Dean Winchester, Paranormal Romance, Bad Parent John Winchester, Bad Parent Naomi, not major character death, Past Child Abuse (not physical) Summary: Dean doesn't have the guts to grab Sam from Stanford. Dean fails to find his missing dad. Dean can, however, hunt the ghost haunting his house. Yeah, Dean buys a haunted house. On purpose. After a quick salt and burn of the bitter old ghost of Naomi Novak, Dean can finally have something in his life go right. But the ghost isn't what Dean's expecting. The spirit he finds is a polite, broad shouldered, blue eyed man in a trench coat who, instead of throwing Dean through the window in a vengeful rage, asks Dean for help. Dean agrees to assist Castiel, the Friendly Ghost, with moving on to the next life. Cas isn't like any ghost Dean had ever met. The usual rules don't apply to him. He's kind to Dean. He loves books. His cold touch brings mortals close to death. The more time Dean spends with Cas, the less Dean wants to let him go. Cas is good company. Dean hasn't let himself get close to anyone in years. In a different life, Dean could have fallen in love with him. Or maybe he already has.

midnight cowboy | @gracefreakdean Rating: Explicit Word Count: 3,534 Main Tags/Warnings: Pre-Series!Dean, Prostitution, Suicidal Ideation, Self-Worth Issues, Internalized Homophobia, Time Skips, Hurt/Comfort, Gay!Dean, Dean/Others, Underage Sex, and Graphic Depictions of Violence Summary: 𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘣𝘰𝘥𝘺 𝘪𝘴 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘰 𝘣𝘦 𝘶𝘵𝘪𝘭𝘪𝘻𝘦𝘥. Dean's relationship with sex, ages seventeen-and-a-half to forty-one.

Shifting States | @artemis-73 Rating: Explicit Word Count: 18,493 Main Tags/Warnings: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Self-Sacrificing Castiel, Castiel and Dean Winchester Have a Profound Bond, Dreams, Angst Summary: For 29 years, Dean has lived an ordinary life with a normal, if dysfunctional, family. That changes when he starts having strange, vivid dreams about monsters, the apocalypse, and a man with piercing blue eyes. In his search for answers, he will go down a path that threatens everything he's ever known.

Physical Graffiti | @entropic-saudade Rating: Explicit Word Count: 62,894 Main Tags/Warnings: Alternate Universe, Self-Harm, Alcoholism, Aftermath of Violence, PTSD, Past Sexual Assault, Past Drug Addiction, Minor Character Death, Child Abuse, Murder Mystery, Recreational Drug Use, Inspired by Sharp Objects Summary: The only ghosts and demons are the ones inside his head. Fresh from a prematurely-ended stint at an inpatient psychiatric facility, ‘former’ self-harmer and functional alcoholic Dean Winchester returns to Sioux Falls, where he works as a crime journalist. His editor, Bobby Singer, sends him back home to Lawrence to gather the story on the murder of a teen boy and the recent disappearance of another. Painful memories from growing up resurface, and the investigation is further complicated by the town’s gossipy tight-knit nature, Dad’s judgment, and botched attempts at making inroads with his estranged half-family, Kate and Adam Milligan. Dean crosses paths with Castiel Novak, a renegade detective from Kansas City with a troubled past of his own. They work together, slipping past each other’s facades, digging down toward the truth. As it turns out, monsters just might be real—and they just might live at home.

Here's to Never Growing Up | @GhoulsnHalos (AO3) Rating: Explicit Word Count: 51,236 Main Tags/Warnings: Alternate universe, rock star!Dean, Journalist!Cas, Second chances, mentions of alcohol abuse, misunderstandings, Time skip fic, eventual happy ending, oral sex, frottage, team switch, gaslighting—mostly offscreen (not by Cas or Dean) Summary: Journalist Castiel Novak's love life is a complete mess. Dean Winchester is the poster boy for booze, sex, and rock'n'roll. A decade ago, while working at Les Troubadours, they fell in love; however, after Dean's band opened for Vince Vincente, a disagreement and misunderstandings caused a bitter split. Their paths haven't crossed since. What happens now Dean's about to go solo and Castiel, under a pen name, has to interview him for Rock SoundZ magazine? How is any of this relevant to Fergus MacLeod (AKA: Crowley) Dean's manager?

A Driver Worth His Salt | @thefandomsinhalor Rating: Explicit Word Count: 67,834 Main Tags/Warnings: Modern Setting AU, Crimes and Criminals, BAMF Castiel, Slow Burn, Slow Build, Pining, Top Castiel/ Bottom Dean, Mafia, Cars Summary: Twenty-year-old Dean Winchester hates fixing up stolen cars on the side for Gordon Walker. But with his grandfather’s dry-cleaning business slowly dying, medical bills piling up, and his younger brother Sam abandoning the prospect of attending college because of their grim situation, Dean convinces himself that it isn’t as reckless as it seems. When everything goes belly up, leaving him in a troubling position with the wrong people, a representative of the Garrisons, the city’s most powerful and notorious family, offers Dean to help him with his situation in exchange for his employment. The job is simple: drive the passenger a few times a week to yet-undisclosed locations and return with said passenger without fail. Don’t ask questions. Be on time. Be discreet. And never interact with each other outside of work. Shady, but simple. So, he accepts. But once he meets the passenger in question—the sharply dressed and rough-looking Castiel Novak—Dean finds that abiding those rules may be more complicated than he had anticipated.

Euphonious | @thefandomsinhalor Rating: Explicit Word Count: 44,190 Main Tags/Warnings: Modern Settings AU, Castiel's Voice, Pining, Fluff and Angst, Family Issues, Bad Parent Mary Winchester, Self-Worth Issues, Abandonment Issues, Dean Has a Crush on Castiel, Book Club, Top Castiel/ Bottom Dean Summary: Between dealing with family drama and feeling discouraged by the dating scene, Dean, more than ever, craves the comfort of his secret guilty pleasure: spicy gay romance audiobooks, particularly those narrated by the enigmatic and sensuous CJ Novak. But Dean has more than one secret and when he unexpectedly overhears the titillating voice of his favourite narrator at a bookstore one day, drawn to him like a moth to a flame, he desperately wants an introduction. The only problem is that he tends to turn into a complete mumbling disaster in front of handsome men. And his favourite narrator? He’s as dreamy as they come.

Take Me Out to the Pacific | @seidenapfel Rating: Explicit Word Count: 13,895 Main Tags/Warnings: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Post-Episode: s14e08 Byzantium (Supernatural), Angst with a Happy Ending, Love Confessions, Suicidal Ideation, Castiel and Dean Winchester Have a Profound Bond, Mind Sex, Ma'lak Box (Supernatural), endgame human cas Summary: With an archangel confined in his head, Dean takes the only sensible step: Splash. Buried alive at the bottom of the Pacific, he will be doomed, but the world will be saved. As he seals his fate, Dean starts to talk, to pray. Even though Cas won't be able to hear him, it helps Dean calm himself. For the first time, he pours out his heart, when, all of the sudden, Cas answers. All too aware of Cas' secret deal with the Shadow, Dean knows that if he ever is to be rescued, it will be Cas' death sentence.

Eight Coils and a Length of Rope | @seidenapfel Rating: Explicit Word Count: 13,402 Main Tags/Warnings: Alternate Universe - Western, Spaghetti Western, Strangers to Lovers, Hanging, Angst with a Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, Hurt Dean Winchester, Hand Jobs, Anal Sex, Top/Bottom Versatile Castiel/Dean Winchester Summary: Freedom is a length of rope and God wants you to hang yourself with it. Well, unless others do it for you.

Dream of Happiness | @casualdistance Rating: General Word Count: 1,993 Main Tags/Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply, Castiel/Dean Winchester, Castiel, Dean Winchester, Gabriel, Hannah, Alternate Universe - Fantasy, Noble/Peasant, Grief, Food Issues, Eating Disorder Not Otherwise Specified, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Past Character Death, Past Gabriel/Kali (Supernatural) Summary: Castiel is to marry, ordered to do so by his brother and his King, but the one Castiel wishes to marry is the one he cannot.

[formulafanfics13]

hiii!! i love your fics so much!

could you write an oscar one with a best friend and she’s getting married to someone else but for whatever reason isn’t really happy in the relationship (which oscar can tell even if she’s never explicitly said) and at the wedding he objects which means it can’t continue that day and his objection turns into a long-winded confession thing

I Object - OP81

Masterlist

Summary: On your wedding day, just as you're about to marry the man everyone thinks is right for you, Oscar Piastri — your best friend — stands up to object. He confesses he’s been in love with you for years, that you're not truly happy, and that he can’t let you marry someone else. Overwhelmed, you walk away from the altar and kiss him in front of everyone.

Warnings: Angst, public confrontation, runaway bride trope, emotional confession, disrupted wedding. Romantic drama.

The church was beautiful. Golden, blooming, ridiculous. A cathedral of candlelight and fresh roses, drenched in silk and violin music. Every pew was full. Every breath hushed.

You stood at the altar, veil pinned delicately into place, eyes glossy and unfocused as the officiant read words you weren’t really hearing.

The man beside you smiled. Your fiancé. The one everyone said made sense. The one who ticked all the boxes. The one who wore the right shoes and said the right things and asked the right questions on cue. And yet, your hands were shaking.

Somewhere in the third row, Oscar Piastri was staring at you like the world was ending.

He’d been quiet all morning. Didn’t join the groomsmen photos. Didn’t toast at the rehearsal dinner the night before. Just floated on the edges like a ghost in a suit, watching everything like he was collecting evidence for a future crime scene.

Because he knew. Without you ever saying a word. He knew you weren’t happy.

Not in the way that mattered. Not in the way you were supposed to be when you were about to tie your life to someone else’s.

He knew the difference between content and in love. He knew what your laugh sounded like when it wasn’t filtered through politeness. He knew you loved yellow tulips and hated lace sleeves. And when you walked down the aisle in a dress that wasn’t you, to marry a man who wasn’t him, something inside him snapped.

The officiant kept reading.

“-if anyone here should object to this union-”

The words echoed. And then...

“I do.”

It cut through the cathedral like a blade.

Everyone turned. You froze. Your fiancé’s mouth dropped open. And there, standing in the aisle, voice louder than it had ever been, stood Oscar. Suit slightly wrinkled. Face flushed. Hands at his sides. And a fire in his eyes that didn’t flicker.

“I object,” he said again. Louder. “I-fuck-I object.”

Gasps. Someone dropped their program. The groom took a step forward. “Oscar, what the hell are you-”

“Because she’s not happy,” Oscar snapped. “Because she’s not fucking happy. And I don’t care if no one else sees it, I do. I have.”

Silence.

You couldn’t move. You couldn’t breathe. He took a shaky breath, stepping closer. “She doesn’t love you. Not like that. Not enough to spend forever pretending. She’s scared. She wants something safe and simple and stable, and that’s what you gave her. But it’s not what she wants. Not really.”

Your chest was rising too fast.

“She laughs like she’s holding her breath when she’s with you,” he said, eyes locked to yours. “And she picked a wedding dress that she thought your mother would like. And I’ve watched her shrink down to fit a life that looks good in photos, but makes her eyes dimmer every fucking day.”

Your fiancé was speechless.

And Oscar? He just kept going. Like once it started, he couldn’t stop. “I know because I’ve known her my whole life,” he said. “I know her real laugh. I know she cries when she’s angry and hates slow walkers and eats M&Ms by colour. I know she’s scared of being difficult, so she goes quiet instead. I know she writes letters she never sends. I know she’s in love with love, but she’s never let herself actually feel it.”

Your knees were trembling.

“And I know I’m a fucking coward,” he said, chest heaving now. “Because I’ve been in love with her since we were seventeen and I never told her. Because I thought if I just stayed close enough, maybe it would be enough. Maybe being her best friend would be enough.”

Everyone was watching. No one moved. Even the goddamn priest was silent.

“I thought if I kept my mouth shut, she’d be happy,” he said. “But she’s not. And I can’t-fuck-I can’t watch her marry someone she doesn’t love just because it’s neat and it’s right and it’s what she thinks she deserves.”

He looked at you again. Full. Raw. Nothing left to hide. “I’m not the right guy. I don’t have the polished job or the rich family or the perfect timing. But I would worship you. I would never let you feel like you had to shrink yourself to be loved. I would tell you I loved you every single fucking day for the rest of your life, and I would mean it.”

Your bouquet hit the floor. You hadn’t realised you’d dropped it.

Oscar’s voice cracked. “I’m sorry I waited this long. But I won’t wait forever. Not if it means watching you spend your whole life pretending.”

He took a step back. “If you want to marry him, I’ll shut up. I’ll sit down and I’ll let it happen. But I had to try.”

Silence. Stillness. And then you moved. You stepped down from the altar, veil sliding from your hair. Your shoes clicking on marble. Your hands still trembling. Your fiancé didn’t stop you. He didn’t say a word.

You walked straight to Oscar. Your best friend. The boy who always looked at you like you were impossible.

You stared at him. Heart thudding. Tears spilling over. “Say it again,” you whispered.

He blinked. “What?”

“Say it again.”

He swallowed. “I love you.”

You grabbed his face and kissed him so hard it nearly knocked you both over. And somewhere behind you, the wedding guests burst into chaos.

[harmless-variety-of-garden-snake]

But With You I Just Go Wild

Written for @bottomtommyweek Day Two: Kinks (alternate prompt). Here there be drugged sex/somnophilia. It's Buck/Tommy!

Tommy exists in the realm of what he thinks of as “vanilla kinks,” which is to say that he’s spanked a few people, gone cruising via apps, and his boyfriend calls him Daddy sometimes. But Evan is helping him to expand his horizons, because normally Tommy would only be willing to explore most things if he trusts someone. There’s no one in the world he trusts more than Evan.

“You’ve gotta have fantasies, though,” Evan says from where his head is pillowed on Tommy’s stomach. “Like, I still have some I haven’t done because it would break the law or because it’s not physically possible.”

“You mean like porn scenarios or what?” Tommy asks, and Evan's eyebrows raise. “What?”

“Babe, all your porn is just us, amateur couples fucking, or bears with muscle bottoms,” he points out, and Tommy flushes. “There's no story in any of them, they’re just on a bed or whatever.”

“There used to be,” he admits, stroking his fingers through Evan’s messy curls. “Back in the day of dial-up, I used to download whatever was available. It was mostly sad Eastern European guys, gay-for-pay frat bros, and twinks getting fucked in classrooms by balding ‘roid monsters. I don't miss it.”

“That’s pretty fair,” Evan concedes, making a face. “You never liked any of them?”

“I mean, I was a horny teenager, so I was just happy to be looking at a dick that wasn't my own,” he points out, then pauses. “Okay, some of the frat guy ones were hot.”

Evan raises an eyebrow and smiles. “Yeah?”

Tommy reaches out to poke the eyebrow with his fingertip. “What about you? What's your not physically possible fantasy?”

“Freezing time, playing with the person I want, and then time unfreezes and they feel everything I did all at once,” Evan says easily, and Tommy blinks. “I read it in a porn story once. It'd be with consent in my case, obviously. But you'd blink and be fine and normal and then immediately be cumming and feel like you just got fucked.”

“That's…you know what? Fair enough,” Tommy says, considering that for all of a half a second and deciding it would be really hot. “You could always just fuck me while I'm sedated. That's sort of similar. I'd try it.”

Evan scratches his nails through Tommy's happy trail for a moment. “If we hate it, we just never do it again.”

“Exactly.”

He smiles up at Tommy before wriggling up for a kiss, and Tommy wonders if being with another person was always supposed to be this easy or if Evan's just that special.

Read the rest on AO3 here!

[withluvvenus]

　

"　h͟e͟'s just so in 𝓁ove with her　―　and s͟h͟e͟'s so in 𝓁ove with him　"　

　

　

　　　a billionaire dollar ﹙✶﹚ love story　　

　

　　　photos taken after a charity gala　.

　　MAY 6TH 　　　2000

　　　　it's the sixth of may , and a baby girl has been bought into this world . she's a sweetheart , looks of it too . the second she is born , she's passed on to the hands of one of the richest men the world has seen , her father . her eyes are just like her mother's , the most successful and wealthiest women in the world . forbes was supposed to meet with the couple that fine week , speak about the troubles and uprisings they were living through with their generational and hard earned wealth . yet , they were at the hospital instead . a hospital for the middle class , it was the first one they could've reached since her mother had gone into labor . the hospital wasn't one of those fancy ones in which water with mint leaves and cut up lemon would be served . yet , the doctors took good care , even better than any doctor had , and delivered the baby girl smoothly .

　　　　　　　　　　 ﹙✶﹚　　

　　AUG 28TH 　　　2003　

　　　　the girl was three years old now , and had to be checked up by the doctors . just an annual check up for little kids like her , nothing too big , nothing over the top . she went with her father , her mother had been entranced in an important and very professional meeting earlier that day . business calls here and tricky emails there . her mother was busy , but she still found time for her daughter . not today though , and nobody blamed her . venus's father took her to the hospital , the same one she was born in . after the excellent treatment three years ago , they hadn't stopped visiting . in the waiting room , the little girl sat patiently . she seemed poised , sitting next to her father on the little sterile chair . she kicked her legs , her father stopped her . told her it's a ' bad omen ' . whatever that means to a three year old like her .

　　　　the girl got up , on her feet as her shortness made her way around the waiting room . she made a friend actually , a boy who seemed to be a year older than her . he had blond hair , said his name was ' christopher ' but everyone called him ' chris ' . he played tag with her in the waiting area , adults glaring at them but venus's father had their back . as she ran after him to tag him , both of their childlike laughs looming through the hallways and lounge . they giggled whenever one of them was tagged , laughed when the other fell . chris was goofy , silly even . but what venus didn't expect was for her to bump into chris again . but wait , chris was behind her wasn't he ? he was , then who was this boy who looked just like him ? was there a second chris ?

　　　　there were three of him , and apparently the boy she was playing tag with was the youngest . there must've been something weird , like the cloning device from the shows she watches ? no , apparently they were ' triplets ' . nick the eldest , matt the middle , and chris the youngest . what had she gotten herself into ? three boys who visited this hospital because they claimed to be from a middle class family , three boys who looked strangely alike , but they all had different quirks . from the way nick joked to chris's loopy grin , to how matt seemed to smile with his teeth , it was everything to venus . they were going to become her best friends , no matter what social class they were in .

　　

　　　" should we tell them ? " 　　　" no , let's keep it a secret for now " 　　　" you want little kids to call the shots ? " 　　　" they're not three year olds , they're our heirs and heiress "　 　　　" things must be done differently with old money "　 　　　" better even , new money "　　 　　　

　　

　　　　why matt　　?

　　　　matt was the answer to her prayers , when she would clasp her hands together in the wide sunroom of her estate . she prayed up to whoever was listening , if it be any hindu god or goddess , or even the southern winds themself . he was the answer in every way possible . whenever she pleaded for something , some reason to belong , he would be there the next day , with that toothy smile and now brunett hair . he was like the fresh breath of air she always needed , the hand in the darkness that just made sense . a moment with him felt like an eternity had passed , the outcome of something wonderful . if a soul had a bond , and if the bond was to ever be broken , venus's soul would be trapped with matt's , never to be corrupted . and however more she tried to distance herself from him , unsure of how her father and mother would feel if she found home in a boy below her , nothing could pull her apart . he was like a magnet towards her , every second she tried to pull away , he pushed her back in . like a tide from the ocean , his love came back in waves , but never left for her . like the sun on a gloomy day , she would always appear once again for him , never not to be found . so , why matt ? well , because she loved him . loved him in ways she didn't love the other brothers , didn't love anyone else really . how could she ? when she had been dating matthew since they were kids , since the day they ' fake married ' at the park , his brothers playing all the roles while matt slipped on a ring pop on her fingers . his brothers grinned and cheered when venus gave matt the biggest hug ever , a vow in itself .

　

　　　　　　　　　　　　　 𝘄𝗶𝘁𝗵𝗹𝘂𝘃 ✶ 𝘃𝗲𝗻𝘂𝘀

[svmjaeyvn]

NIGHTS LIKE THIS — 박종성

MINORS DNI ! IM NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR WHAT YOU CONSUME

You’d never consider yourself a smoker, hell, last year you couldn’t even bare the smell of weed that lingered on your cousins’ clothes after a night out. But one night of feeling adventurous turned into many, and now you found yourself being your plug's favorite sweetheart. You didn’t even care that Park Jongseong was a notorious asshole to everyone, considering it was everyone but you. Besides, there’s no way you’d pass up having your plug be your friends with benefits, especially when it came with way more than you’d imagined.

pairing — stoner+plug!jay x semi-stonerfem!reader, college/ya au

word count -- 22k (oops?)

featuring — stoner!enha hyung line, enha!maknae line as your nosey neighbors and juniors, manon and lara from katseye as your besties (LUV), and (1) keeho mention for shits and giggles

content/warnings — weed smoking (duh), partying, alcohol, profanity, loads of sexual innuendos + casual convos about sex cause they’re adults!, heeseung as your annoying ass older cousin, jay being the plug-turned-close friend bc of heeseung, lots of sex or sexual tension the entire time, mentions of jay being an asshole but you never see it bc you’re a princess, unprotected sex (oops), public-ish sex?? (at a party, in the car, fucking while on the phone, etc.), throat fucking (ish), sloppy head (m&f receiving), lots of pet names (princess, baby, love, pretty girl, etc.), reader referred to as slut one time (endearing lol), creampies, fucking under the influence, possessive/jealous jay (A LOT cause i love a possessive fictional man), messy situationship, sort of toxic dynamic at first, (1) scene of vaping/smoking with riki, reader has her faults let her live!, one almost fight scene between guys, jay fell first and harder (hell yeah), reader is a BADDIE (ass fat, big tits and nipple piercings yuh), reader is described as conventionally attractive and small

note — don’t like it? don’t read it! full disclosure, my dabble into smoking is, like, minimal so i’m mostly talking out of my ass but the concept of jay lighting a blunt in my mouth is teeew good to NOT write about. this was originally made to be a short drabble but i dont know how to stfu so here we are (this took me 2 months to write, it was supposed to come out on 4/20 lol). tbh the smoking plotline got lost in the midst of minimal angst and fluff but i promise desperate cutesy jay is worth everything. please enjoy <3

“You’re sick,” Riki grimaces, eyes following you as you pause in front of your full length mirror. “Sick in the head,” He continues, you leaning closer to ensure your lipgloss wasn’t smudged in the slightest and hair flowed the way you wanted.

“You realize that Jay’s literally seen you at your worst, right? Like before you decided he was hot and shit you looked like a troll here at the house,” Heeseung adds with a snort, leant against the doorframe with his arms crossed. You meet his gaze through the mirror, a sarcastic smile sent his way as you flip him off through the reflection.

“We’re going to a party,” You remind, deflecting how much effort you put into the look rather than the majority of it being to impress the practically household name that belongs to Park Jongseong. “Besides, he likes this skirt and gives me stuff for free so this would actually benefit you too, idiot,”

Heeseung pauses, thinking over the fact that even with the long-term friend discount, Jay practically gave you whatever you asked for these days with little to no charge. Biting his tongue for once, he nods, but that doesn’t erase the obvious annoyance and discomfort he felt thinking about you and one of his best friends being together.

Riki shakes his head, laid on your bed petting the short-haired cat that was curled into his side. Said boy was a part of the trio that lived next door to your apartment, Nishiurma Riki, the one you and Heeseung called over to feed your shared pets and watch them for a while on the nights you planned on being out for long.

He had no problem with it, especially with the easy money he gained and the fact that the two of you always left enough for him to order in on top of that. Thus he was familiar with the sight, one he’s been having to see unfold more and more recently.

What he did have a problem with was you getting involved with Park Jongseong in the first place. You were smart, pretty, and admittedly a crazy bitch, but you were one of the first people who he actually felt at home with aside from Jungwon and Sunoo.

And sure, Jay wasn’t that bad. Hell, he allows Riki to speak Japanese openly and keeps up, though sometimes slow and tripping over his words, but still allows him to feel comfortable speaking his native language. But Jay also sold weed as a pastime and had a track record of being the biggest asshole when something pissed him off. Not that he’s actually seen it quite yet but still, you deserved the best.

Not that Riki would actually ever voice his opinion on it, after all it was your life and you were an adult. Besides, Sunoo and Jungwon made their comments enough to tell you their not quite distaste but not quite liking of him even though your circles rarely overlapped on occasion.

“Are you done? Jake says they’re pulling up,” Heeseung pulls your attention away from the reflection where you had just finished clasping your last layered necklace. You gave yourself a once over, a smile of satisfaction quirking at the corners of your lips as you turned around.

“Let’s go,” You hum, slinging the thin jacket over your shoulders for minimal protection from the cold outside air. You spared a look to Riki before you exited the room, shooting the younger boy a wink as your voice lingered through the walls bidding your goodbyes to him and the cats for the night.

You could hear Heeseung’s footsteps follow, you waiting at the front door for him to open it per routine and you nearly jumping coming inches apart from a rather giddy looking Jake. There was a slight gleam to his look, notably already started on his pregame and a few strands fallen from his almost perfectly styled hair from his habit of running his hands through it.

Jake practically bounced on the heels of his feet, a sloppy smile playing at his lips as he pulled a familiar thin white tube from his pocket. “Hoon’s not drinking but he’s down for a smoke, you guys want in on this one?”

· · ─ ·✶· ─ · · ─ ·✶· ─ · · ─ ·✶· ─ · · ─ ·✶· ─ · · ─ ·✶ ─ · ·

“There she is!” Lara giggles, an arm thrown around your shoulders pulling you in for a hug with her words somehow louder than the blaring music that came from the speakers in the house. “Bitch, where have you been? It’s soo late,”

“It’s barely 9,” You snort, stumbling a bit to uphold her weight seeing how rather fucked up she already seemed so early on. “We just got here, you been drinking for a minute?”

“Manon and I might’ve gone a little crazy while pregaming,” Lara admits, the cup in her hand sloshing around with unfamiliar contents of alcohol. “Midterms have been a bitch, I needed this. But trust, I’m good—nowhere near throwing up yet,”

“Guess we gotta catch up,” Heeseung’s voice interrupts from behind. You noted the way Lara suddenly stood up straighter, and the stupid smile Heeseung was notorious for causing you to roll your eyes with a grimace.

“Don’t touch her,” You warn, waggling a finger at Heeseung while he lets out a laugh. You turn to Lara next as she pouts, “He’s gross, you’re drunk, trust me you’ll regret it,”

You excused yourself to make your way to the kitchen, the layout of the frat house familiar considering you’ve been here more times than you could count for parties. You bid friendly smiles and short greetings to the familiar faces, settling into the line of alcohol to choose from in the coolers filled with ice and a huge jug of jungle juice you wouldn’t dare think of trying.

You peeked into the fridge, smiling seeing the bottles of pineapple juice you begged Keeho to buy earlier in the day when he asked what drinks the frat should provide for the night. Perks of being friends with a member, you got to make yourself sweet drinks that tasted good and fucked you up at the same time.

Just as you finished pouring a generous amount of tequila into a new solo cup, you felt a hand find its place on your hip and the familiar smell of cologne that filled your senses that you’ve grown rather fond of.

“Hi princess,” Jay’s voice fluttered against the shell of your ear, the heat of his breath causing a chill to run up your spine and stupidly annoying smile to appear at your lips.

“Hi Jay,” You repeat, not bothering to spare him a look quite yet. You topped off your drink with juice to the brim, turning in your spot in his arms that kept you encased against the counter. You brought the drink to your lips, taking a sip and maintaining eye contact with him as you did.

“You look pretty,” He compliments, eyes flickering down to your lips as you hum. You held the cup up, Jay taking a small sip and chuckling at the excessive amount of liquor you had poured into the half-assed cocktail.

“Too strong?”

He shook his head, one hand squeezing your hip and the other tucking a strand of hair behind your ear as it fell out of place. “You know I don’t drink much,”

You hummed again, taking a longer drink this time and feeling the familiar burn down your throat. “You been waiting for me?” You tease, knowing well enough Jay was at practically every party on campus due to it being his best selling grounds.

But he nods, a laugh leaving his lips and you smile at the sight. A few months ago it would’ve been a rare occasion to even see him crack a smile at any of the stupid jokes the guys made, it felt good knowing how easy it was for you to see an even prettier sight of him now.

“Of course I have,” His voice is warm, the words teasing but there was a certain glint in his eyes as he scanned over every little detail of your face, almost as if he were memorizing a picture in his mind. “You get all dressed up f’me?”

“Of course I did,” You repeat, half hearted but his lips quirked at your words anyway. Just as he was about to speak again, a loud voice broke the bubble the two of you were in, reminding you of the loud music and numerous bodies that flowed about.

“Hey! I've been looking for you. You still got anything on you man?” An obnoxiously unfamiliar guy barreling toward you caused you to grimace. Obviously intoxicated, and probably far too drunk to get cross-faded at this point, you shrink away from Jays’ hold to allow him to do his business.

“Nah man,” Jay’s words were short, to the point and he barely spared the guy a look as his hand on your hip squeezed gently—a silent gesture for you to stay put.

“What? C’mon man it’s barely gonna be 10? No way you’re out—” The guy persisted, slurring his words and swaying in his spot. One of his hands came up to grab onto Jay’s shoulder while the other nearly dropped his opened seltzer right where you stood.

You stiffened, ready to push the clearly drunk loser away from you if he fell but you didn’t have to. Jay used one arm, shoving the guy back a few stumbled steps with a bored expression while the other hand didn’t let go of the protective hold he had on you.

“I’m out,” Is all he says. His jaw clenched, emphasizing his already prominent jawline and eyes sharp, practically daring the guy to push for more.

Even drunk, he seemed to take the hint. A short mumble of something along the lines of muttered insults were heard before you and Jay were left alone once more. And you snickered, giggling at the sight of the stumbling drunkard who made his way back to his group of friends who were expectantly waiting on his return.

“You alright?” Jay asked after a beat of silence, eyes running over your figure while you nod. He visibly relaxed, a smile quirking at his lips as he leaned in slightly. “You smoking tonight, pretty girl?”

You laughed, “Thought you were out?”

“I always have something for you,” He smirks, hand lacing with your own and beginning to pull you toward the back door that leads outside.

“For how much?”

Jay glances over his shoulder to send you a pointed look. “Don’t ask stupid questions,” He scoffs, nearly offended considering he hasn’t charged you in months. The only time you gave him money recently was for Heeseung who paid you for it in the first place.

“You’re letting me rob you at this point Jjong,” You snicker, goosebumps forming at the skin exposed on your legs from the chilly outside air that your mini skirt did nothing to combat against.

He doesn’t say anything, though you noticed the small quirk of his lips that he attempted to bite back. Jay pulls the two of you to the far end of the yard, numerous chairs spread around the pool unoccupied as it was growing colder with the seasons changing leaving the outside of the house with only a few lingering groups who talked amongst themselves.

He settles into a seat, dragging you down onto his lap rather than the empty chair directly beside his own. You raise a brow, refraining from a remark at how he couldn’t get enough of you considering you’ve grown to love how clingy he got at times. One of your arms draped over his shoulder, your legs perched across his own and he held you steady allowing for your weight to be leant against him with an arm encasing you to his chest.

Jay pulled a familiar baggie from his pocket, there only being two near perfectly rolled joints. He plucked one out, hand dipping into his pocket once more to pull out his lighter and tucking the remaining one away for now.

Wordlessly, he holds it up to your lips with one hand causing you to pout. “I have gloss on,” You remind, moving your head away while he sends you a bored look.

“When have I cared about shit like that?” He snickers. “It’s just me and you princess, not like you’re sharing with a group,” Jay reminds, eyes holding your own as you scrunch your nose. 

Jay lets out a breathy laugh before pulling you closer as he grips your chin, guiding your lips to his own. Your lips meet, a small gasp leaving your mouth out of surprise at the sudden contact and you could feel the cocky smile that formed on his features. Your hand found his hair, playing with the longer strands while rolling your hips in the slightest manner.

He pulled back, holding you in place with a pointed look as if telling you to behave. You smiled, thumb dragging over his bottom lip to remove the shine that transferred over from yours.

“Making me ruin your pretty make up,” Jay mumbles with a playful tsk, holding the joint up once more while you hum. Your lips wrapped around the tip, just enough to hold it while his other hand uses the lighter to spark it. He held the flame just enough for the paper to ignite, you sucking in a long hit to ensure the spliff would stay burning.

You held it for a moment, inhaling the smoke before turning your head the other way to not blow it directly in Jays’ face. You hear his laugh, knowing that you didn’t tend to like starting the first hit and you faced him with a roll of your eyes.

You watched him take a long drag, one that never failed to make you wonder how he didn’t end up coughing more but then again, he’s been smoking a lot longer than you. Jay could feel your eyes lingering on him longer than they should’ve, his second inhale shorter but he blew the smoke in your face this time after meeting your gaze.

You shook your head, hand gently pushing his face away from your own as his laugh filtered through the air between you. He holds out the joint for you to grab, careful to not drop it considering your nails were longer than usual thanks to your fresh set and Manon encouraging you to do long rather than medium this time.

You took a comfortable puff while glancing around the backyard. You looked toward the house, half a mind to remember to check on Jake soon considering he was probably the most fucked up by now.

“You come with the guys, right?”

You nod. “Sunghoon’s the DD for the night,” Cheeks blowing out a notable breath due to the cold air as you tilted your head back with a sigh. “Jake was already on a good one before we left, had two joints in the car… which I assume he got from you?”

Jay lets out a breathy laugh, the sound causing your gaze to fall back on him feeling the small shrug he did. “Gave him a couple extra the other day but I guess he held onto them for tonight,”

A beat of silence passed over you two, your eyes scanning his side profile as Jay draws small circles with his hand on your hip. You pass back the slow burning joint to him, taking a sip of the cold drink in your hand which caused you to shiver.

“Why’d you start selling?” Your question lingered in the air between you. You’ve never asked, because quite frankly, you never cared. Hell, it wasn’t like Jay was the deep type that went through the why’s and what if’s in his life much anyway.

Plus, everyone in his circle knew him, so why talk about the shitty situations he’s put himself through more than needed? It wasn’t healthy, obviously, but he was also a guy who had friends that didn’t get emotional with each other unless drunk around a fire at 3am.

But you were you, Heeseung’s loud mouth younger cousin that infiltrated the group's lives two years ago when you came to live with him for uni. He’d seen you at your worst already, be it first thing in the morning or late at night off a drunken escapade having to be carried home and slung over the toilet for hours on end.

He knew you, and you knew him, but neither of you actually cared aside from the superficial bond between you two that Heeseung bridged.

Well until a few months ago when whatever this was started to occur. It took one night, an utterly helpless you who flunked your econ class that led to you and Jay in a room together at a party much like this. Your first smoke, one that you begged for and he only gave in after you shoved a crumpled wad of cash — that he snuck back into your purse that night, into his hands because he felt bad.

Because you were you, and he’d never seen you look so miserable before. It was just supposed to be an excuse for him to let you rant, let you indulge in whatever turmoil shit you had going on that you refused to tell Heeseung out of your own ego.

But it wasn’t that simple, not after you spilled every last worry to him as if he were a paid therapist and he realized that you were a dramatic overthinking kid hours away from anyone and everything familiar. So maybe it was pity, or maybe it was the sprout of attraction that misguided his judgment, but one night of self indulgence led to many.

And at some point instead of you sitting across the room from him, you were perched beside him. Ghost smiles and gentle touches turned to sharing seats with one another til at some point, whenever you were together Jay couldn’t keep his hands off you.

“Money,” He says simply, the words clipped in an obvious manner to not ask more. You purse your lips, a slight sting felt from his blunt way to keep you at a distance. You felt like he should’ve given you a little credit, hell he’s been in you a handful of times now, having a decent conversation aside from weed, sex, and alcohol seemed reasonable to you.

When you didn’t respond, Jay took note of the silence that followed. The way you didn’t bother to spare him a look, seemingly finding the open night sky more fascinating than him and taking long sips of your drink that continued to melt as time passed.

Jay watched you, the slight annoyance overshadowed once he noticed your pout. He shook his head, adjusting in his seat with you still perched on his lap as his arms snaked around your waist. “C’mon pretty, don’t get like that. We don’t need to talk about useless shit,”

He mumbled the words against your skin, placing a lazy kiss to your shoulder while you shifted against him. Jay chuckles, a hand softly but firmly moving your chin to look at him. “Can’t have my girl mad at me,”

“I’m not your girl, Jay,” You mutter, attempting to pull your head away but he tsks, fingers gripping the sides of your face and holding you steady. His eyes held a certain look, cocky and taunting as he leaned closer.

“Wanna bet?”

· · ─ ·✶· ─ · · ─ ·✶· ─ · · ─ ·✶· ─ · · ─ ·✶· ─ · · ─ ·✶ ─ · ·

“What’s wrong, baby?” Jay hummed, laughter bubbling through his words as he forced your head up with the grip he held on the base of your hair. His eyes met yours through the mirror, teeth grazing up your neck, making sure to leave a mark while his hips pressed your own into the bathroom counter.

Your skirt was hiked up, lace panties pushed to the side and your tits bounced with each thrust from where Jay had yanked your shirt down. The metal of your piercings glistened every bounce, your nipples fully erect and sensitive every time Jay’s fingers rolled the buds. Your mascara smudged, hair in disarray from Jay’s yanking, forcing you to watch the way he fucked himself into you. Muffled music blared throughout the house, the occasional knock on the door letting you know you had an audience but Jay didn’t care, not after you practically begged him to show you who you belonged to earlier like it was a cute joke.

Your bottom lip was tucked between your teeth, muffling your moans out of your own ego but also so the line waiting outside didn’t have more of a clue of the fact that you were getting put in your place—although Jay had made it perfectly clear that he wasn’t going to be out until he was done after the third knock.

“You should know better by now,” Jay continued, the heat of his breath lingered against your skin. His palm placed a harsh smack to your ass that bounced against him, the hit causing you to hiss while he smirked. His fingertips dug into the flesh of your hips surely to leave a mark, Jay let out a gruntled groan as your walls clenched around him, your body showing how much you liked it even if you were giving him the silence treatment to prove a point. “Pussy knows who you belong to already, you’re made f’me and she knows it,”

“Fuck off,” You manage out, eyes screwed shut feeling the way Jay’s dick kissed your cervix with every deep thrust. There was only one other time the sex you had was like this, rough and possessive, Jay fed up with your drunken behavior that led to you flirting with another guy at a party after a small fight between you two.

He was definitely rougher that time, dragging you into his car and fucking you dumb after making you repeat like a mantra how your body was only for him to touch as long as he was around. You loved it, your body reacting to his touch proving it without you even saying a word.

“So mean baby,” Jay tsks, words mumbled with faux offense. He manages to press himself deeper into you, the curve of his dick hitting just right as a moan left your lips before you could stop it. “Fuuck, there you go, ‘was missing those pretty little noises you make,”

You let out muffled whimpers, head falling forward and desperately trying to keep quiet but you couldn’t. Not with the feeling of Jay hitting you just right every time, not when he reached around to rub his thumb against your clit, your mind going fuzzy and legs growing wobbly to where he had to wrap his arm around your waist and keep you steady.

“So tight baby,” Jay breathes out, a sloppy open mouthed kiss pressed to your shoulder. “You’re takin’ me so well,”

The lewd sounds of your skin slapping echoed throughout the acoustics of the bathroom. If you weren’t slightly intoxicated you might’ve had half a mind to tell Jay to stop being so loud, you probably would’ve convinced him to find a room in the first place. But you didn’t, and god did you not care about anyone else right now.

Your head falls to his shoulder, moans now overtaking the sounds of your bodies and Jay fingers continue the assault on your clit with his growing sloppy pace. He connects your lips, half a mind to shut you up but couldn’t deny the ego boost of his name falling from your mouth.

The tight pull in your stomach tensed, Jay’s grip on your hip leaving fingerprints in your skin. “Fuck, Jay, please,” The words tumbled out of your mouth in a rush between the sloppy kisses. He hummed against your lips, his smile felt as he picked up the pace. His other hand trailed up your waist, pinching at your erect nipple and rolling the piercing, the sight far too pretty and he was grateful for the past you who decided to pierce them in the first place.

You clenched around him, your pussy sucking him in as you rode out your own orgasm, eyes screwed shut and mind fuzzy. His thumb rubbed your clit at a consistent pace until it became overstimulating, you pushed him away lazily and he bent you over the sink to finish.

“Such a good girl my love,” Jay praised, voice low and strained as his head dips back. “So good,” He muttered, continuing with a few more deep thrusts before he pulled out just enough so his tip spilled his warm cum onto your ass, not quite inside but all over your hole that clenched at the loss of him. You could see him smile through the mirror, heavy breaths of satisfaction and a slight gleam of sweat covered his honey skin in the light.

His eyes met yours, the smirk on his lips only growing once he pushed his tip back inside momentarily, you letting out a loud moan feeling the remnant of his cum pushed deep inside you to drip out later.

He pulled you up, dick still buried inside and you could feel the last few twitches of his cock against your walls. The warmth was overwhelming, he hadn’t came inside you directly, but made sure to push enough in after the initial few shots to prove a point. You were on the pill, and Jay would most likely get you one tomorrow either way, but he was a cocky bastard who simply wanted his cum to drain out of you for the rest of the night either way.

“You okay?” He asks softly, a small but innocent kiss placed on your shoulder. His hands softly grazed over your body, adjusting your shirt and brushing the astray strands of hair from your face that stuck to your sweat. You nodded, far too fucked out to say anything and still in a daze from your own orgasm. “What, you don’t got any other smart ass remarks now?”

You rolled your eyes, turning your head ever so slightly to meet his gaze properly. “Shut up,” You mumble, lip tucked between your teeth as you playfully tsked. Jay laughed, placing a chaste kiss to your lips in the process. “Now clean me up, we have a walk of shame to do and a line of pissed off drunk people to see,”

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“I peed in a bush, you sick fucks,” Manon huffs, eyes narrowed at you from across the table where she was slumped over her books. You rolled your eyes, biting back your smile of amusement as memories of last Friday flicker in your mind.

Lara giggles to your left, nudging her shoulder into your own with a suggestive smile. “I support women’s wrongs, good for you for getting dick by one of the hottest guys on campus,”

“Ah yes, because we want you to be a druglord's wife once we graduate,” Manon snorts, the statement one that caused you to burst out in a fit of laughter, baffled by the sudden upgrade of distaste to this.

“You’re so dramatic,” Lara rolls her eyes.

“He sells weed, it’s not like he’s a kingpin, Mon,” You snicker. “Seung told me he’s gonna stop soon too I guess, ‘cause ya know, we’re gonna graduate at some point. I know you guys think he’s just a pothead but he is prelaw and on track with summa cum laude,”

“Every time you tell us that, I think it’s ironic considering he’s selling weed, illegally, to minors a lot of the time ,” Manon emphasized, leaning back in her seat as she played with the ends of her braids absentmindedly.

You purse your lips with a small shrug. You weren’t together, technically, and you weren’t required to defend him to quite literally everyone around you because of his reputation, but it was growing a little old hearing how much your friends disliked him. Sure it wasn’t a great relationship, but you weren’t sitting there begging him to be your boyfriend in some one-sided situationship.

Jay treated you well, better than he owed you considering you were fuck buddies more than anything. At no point did you expect anything, not more than you were willing to give, and to be quite honest, you didn’t want a relationship. You had no actual responsibility, no mental need to be mindful of another person when you barely kept yourself afloat these days.

You didn’t have to see him everyday, you didn’t have to remember to text back, and you sure as hell didn’t have to care about his feelings when you weren’t together. But it was your choice to keep him around, and honestly, you loved the way he acted to your beck and call when needed.

Lara, seemingly catching the subtle shift in your mood, cleared her throat. She nudged her shoulder into your own, a soft smile of quiet reassurance before she changed the topic entirely. You nodded, engaging in small conversation but your mind was elsewhere as you scribbled random drawings in the corner of your notebook.

Your phone buzzed from the tabletop, you picking it up while the two continued to talk unaware.

jjong<3: busy?

y/nnie: why you missing me already?

jjong<3: always

jjong<3: let me take you out for the night

y/nnie: hm fine. at the study hall, come get me🥱

You click off your phone, beginning to gather your things into your bag in order. Manon and Lara watched you, both silently sending each other looks but knowingly choosing to not say a word. And like clockwork, your head picked up to see Jay’s familiar figure stepping in through the entry doors.

His hair was messily slicked back, once done perfectly but had a hand run through it throughout the day. You rose a brow at the business casual look he was sporting–dark slacks, a black button up, and dress shoes with his bag slung over his shoulder, presumably just finished up with whatever assignment his class required for him to dress up for.

You spared a look to your friends who had followed your line of view. You smiled innocently, bidding them a halfhearted goodbye. “Sorry girls, I’m off to self-sabotage and let my walking red flag take me out for the night,” You wink, partially joking but the slight annoyance from the conversation seeped into your words.

You didn’t stay for their responses and sure remarks of you ditching the unprompted study session you were in the midst of. Instead you waltzed your way to Jay who met you halfway, a small smirk quirked at the corner of his lips as he gave you a once over, his eyes slow and deliberate.

“I’m gonna stop you right now,” You cleared your throat as soon as you were in talking range, a hand held up to create distance between you. “You’re not getting any sex from me tonight, Park Jongseong. Take it or leave it,” You state bluntly, you regretting it as soon as the words left your lips though once you got an up close view of him, the thought of unbuckling his belt and seeing his come undone in his formal attire flickering through your mind.

Jay raises a brow, head tilting in the smallest of ways as his eyes narrow at you. He takes a second, gaze searching your own for a moment. “I’m not that bad for you to assume that’s all I want you for, am I?” He chuckles, words meant to be joking but you felt the slight offense hidden in his expression.

You shrug, breaking his gaze suddenly embarrassed for insinuating. Sure your relationship was mainly sex, but Jay wasn’t that shallow to leave you just because you didn’t want to do anything, he was your sort of friend-by-association before anything.

Maybe everyone being in your ear emphasizing how you were basically a free use doll was starting to get to you.

He stays silent for a moment, you still avoiding his gaze and shifting your arms across your front uncomfortably. Jay sighs, rolling his eyes half-heartedly as he closes the space between you. “Stop overthinking whatever shits making your pretty little head spin,” He mutters, dragging the strap of your bag off your shoulder and instead slinging it over his own to carry. Jay then grabs hold of your hand, gently lacing your fingers and beginning to guide you out of the student center.

“For the record, I never expect anything from you whenever we see each other,”

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Your shoulder brushed against his arm every so often, sandwiched between Jay’s broad shoulders and the wall as he insisted on sitting on the same side of the tiny booth you sat at. Tucked away in the corner of the small Thai place you found a few weeks ago, the low lighting created a cozy ambiance with delicious aroma flowing throughout the fairly busy restaurant.

Jay was leant against the tabletop, body angled toward you and arm draped across the seats, his fingers playing with the ends of your hair absentmindedly. The orders of spring rolls, fried rice, and pad sew half eaten, both of you fed and engaging in small conversation.

After a lingering beat of silence, Jay lets out a long, frustrated, groan. His head tilts back, adam’s apple bobbing and jawline prominent. “Alright, what’s up doll?”

“Huh?”

Jay gave you a bored look, eyes trailing over you, studying your features as if he knew everything about you. “You’re thinking about something,” He mutters, his thumb pressing gently to your forehead to release the tension of your pinched brows you were unaware of. “What’s going on in that pretty little head?”

You shrug, turning your attention toward your plate and pushing around the few bites you hadn’t finished from before. The fork softly scraped against the porcelain, the sound causing you to wince. “Everyone keeps telling me you’re bad for me, and I’m getting tired of hearing it,”

Jay doesn’t respond at first, instead he scoffs, the light laugh that followed didn’t feel as nonchalant as it was supposed to. His eyes watch you, your gaze focused through the shop windows avoiding him. Your hands toyed with each other, shoulders dropping once you let out a long breath.

“It’s annoying, you know? We’re not even together, so I don’t get why it matters. And you’re not as bad as everyone makes you out to be,” You ramble, brows pinched once more growing seemingly annoyed as you speak. “Don’t get me wrong, I don’t want a relationship with you. I’m perfectly fine with what we have going on but everyone’s in my ear about us being together or not and it’s just like, a girl can want a casual fuck too, you know? Besides, you may be an asshole sometimes but the frat guys are ten times worse with no provoking. So I don’t know why everyone thinks you’re so bad for me like I’m a kid who doesn’t know any better. I’m an adult, actively making decisions, one including the friends with benefits thing we have so why is it so bad?”

Jay watched you for a moment, the way your shoulders tensed, the way you began to wave your hands around as you spoke, your lips pulled into a pout unknowingly. He couldn’t help the smile that pulled at the corners of his lips, your words registered but held little importance to him where he stood in the predicament you found yourself in.

“Even if I were the perfect guy for you, everyone would have something to say eventually,” He shrugs, words stated so simply while you broke your simmering anger to give him a confused look. “You’re choosing this, I’m choosing you. Who cares what everyone thinks?”

You falter, shoulders shrinking not knowing what to say. Your lips part, a loss for words as you blink. “I don’t,” You stutter. “Not necessarily, it’s just, don’t you get tired of everyone asking if we’re dating?”

Jay shrugs, leaning back against the booth as he takes a sip of his drink. “Everyone knows you’re mine,”

You roll your eyes. “That, that’s the point,” You tsk. “We’re not together, Jongseong, you can’t keep feeding that theory by saying shit like that. We’re fucking exclusively out of respect for one another, not because we’re boyfriend-girlfriend. Your ‘claim’ on me can only go so far,” You ramble, arms folding across your front. “You can’t call me your girl with your whole chest like that. Just because we know each other physically and have a surface level relationship, doesn’t mean we’re anywhere near this imaginary couple everyone thinks we are,”

“We’re not together because you don’t want us to be,” Jay says through a clipped tone, words stated with an obvious edge while you gave him an incredulous look. He met your gaze, his steady and certain, a slight annoyance in his expression while your mind ran over analyzing in denial of the confession.

“Wh-what’re you talking about?”

“I’ve never said I was opposed to an actual relationship with you, our dynamic is the way that it is on your own accord,” He states bluntly. “We’ve been at this for months, if you were just a fuck and dump I would’ve been gone a long time ago, you know that,” Jay emphasized, still refusing to shift his piercing gaze from your own.

You had nothing to say. You couldn’t at least, not once did you overthink your relationship, not once did you allow any sort of delusional feelings fester out of your own pride. The thought of being a cliche girl left heartbroken far too embarrassing, not to mention you truly knew nothing about each other when it came down to it.

“We don’t even know each other,” You breathe out, lamely grasping at straws to justify your oblivious ignorance to his confession and presumed feelings all this time.

Jay pursed his lips, nodding along after a moment. He cleared his throat, sitting up straighter and gathering the leftover food items the waiter had dropped off before your sort-of fight began. There was a shift, an obvious wall wedged between you even if Jay hadn’t said so, moving around you with ease.

“You let me know what you want then Y/N,” Jay finally says. “Relationship or not, being with me means people will talk. You decide where this goes,”

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It’s been a week. The longest you’ve gone without contact with Jay since you moved in with Heeseung a few years ago considering every few days the apartment would be flooded with the group hanging out in your living room and eating all the snacks in sight after getting the munchies.

You felt like an idiot, a confused  jumble of a mess because you thought that you had full control over your life once upon a time. Hell, the whole reason you didn’t want a proper relationship was for this–the fighting, stressing, and miscommunications turned into upset feelings and petty frustration. He hadn’t reached out, no random texts every day, no call in the middle of the night to talk, no meet-up slash date.

You didn’t either, taking time and over analyzing every moment you’ve spent together. You were an idiot for how much denial you were in prior, Jay was certainly your boyfriend without the label, at your beck and call and nearly always the one to put himself in your realm to ensure you felt taken care of but you never did the same. You were deluded by the fact that you believed he never, in a million years, wanted a relationship with you, Park Jongseong didn’t do relationships—at least according to every person you asked on campus, so what would’ve made you think differently? 

You were embarrassed, too awkward to reach out now. Everyday that passed you felt worse, deeming it as too much time to ask for forgiveness when you didn’t even have a proper handle on your own feelings. You still didn’t know if you were ready for a relationship, not because you were opposed to one with Jay, but because you lacked emotional maturity that you were willing to admit. Your last proper boyfriend was from high school, and that barely even counted.

Your door was pushed open without warning, Heeseung leaning against the frame holding one of your cats—Koi, in his arms. “You kiss and make up yet?” He asks with a raised brow. You pursed your lips, shaking your head and turning back to the mess you had on your desk from the attempts of studying you’ve been doing the last few days as a distraction. Heeseung let out a long groan. “Stop being stubborn, he’s been in a bad mood all week and it’s starting to get old with both of you moping over whatever dumb shit you’re fighting about,”

“He wants a relationship,” You mutter, words quiet but enough for Heeseung to catch across the room. You didn’t bother to look back, a small weight lifting off your shoulders as you hadn’t uttered a word to anyone about the shift in your relationship no matter how many times they asked.

“Jay told you he wants a relationship?” Heeseung repeats, voice significantly closer as you hear the weight of your bed shift behind you. You nod once. There was a beat of silence, and then a breathless laugh that escaped from Heeseung’s lips as he dragged your chair around to face him. “Park Jongseong told you he wants to be official and what? You don’t? I don’t understand, you two were basically there after the first month of whatever the fuck you had going on,”

“I didn’t think we were like that!” You defend lamely, pulling at the sleeves of your hoodie and shrinking in your seat. “As far as I knew, we were supposed to be friends with benefits, nothing more, nothing less,”

Heeseung scoffs, rolling his eyes at your excuses. “The only reason I didn’t flip out after finding out the two of you were hooking up was because I knew him,” He emphasized. “Jay wouldn’t have been around you everyday just because you gave him pussy. He’s an asshole, he wouldn’t care about you if you didn’t mean something to him Y/N,”

“How was I supposed to know that?” You shoot back, growing frustrated hearing the words you’ve thought in your head spoken out loud. “He doesn’t talk to me! I barely know him, he always pushed me away when I tried to get closer to him more than sex and surface level conversations. I don’t know him, so why is it my fault for thinking this meant nothing?”

Heeseung paused, his eyes softening slightly as he watched you ball yourself up in the chair. He reminded himself you didn’t know the guys like he did, you hadn’t known Jay long, nor did you meet him at the right time of who he truly is. “He’s been through a lot,” Heeseung starts carefully, words soft and watching the way you rolled your eyes. “It’s stupid, but he’s a guy. He’s not gonna tell you everything out of his own ego, and probably because he doesn’t want to bother you with worrying about him,”

“It’s been months Hee,” You sigh, head buried in your arms. “I deserve a little more credit, don’t I? He should trust me to talk to me, especially if he’s been waiting all this time for us to be together,”

“I’m not saying he’s justified for keeping himself blocked off when you’ve been there for him,” Heeseung agrees. “But, as smart as Jay is, he’s not the type to talk about his feelings after he deems them over with. I guess that’s why he’s gonna be a good lawyer, he compartmentalizes, as soon as it’s done, he pushes it away and forces himself to move on even if it’s not healthy and seeps through the cracks sometimes,”

You take a second, lifting your head with a pout. “I shouldn’t have to deal with an emotionally fucked up guy and help him help me understand him,”

Heeseung snorts, shrugging his shoulders. “True, but you’re not exactly sunshine and rainbows to be with either kid,”

You narrow your eyes. “What’re you getting at?”

“You’re avoidant,” He says simply. “I love Uncle Seon but it’s obvious to everyone he isn’t the best at expressing himself. You got a lot of his good qualities but you also picked up on how scared of love he is after what happened with your mom,” Heeseung adds carefully, watching how you reacted to the mention but you didn’t seem to flinch like you used to as kids. “You’re a good person, a best friend, but you suck at romance. You’d rather have the person without the commitment, hence your string of hook-ups before you landed on Jay cause he didn’t run away when you tried to push him out at the start,”

You blinked, eyes trailing over Heeseung who sat on your bed nonchalantly, hands absentmindedly playing with Koi who was settled at the foot of your bed. “When the fuck did you become emotionally mature and suddenly have all the answers?”

He smiled, a small laugh leaving his lips. “Wisdom comes with age,” Heeseung jokes, causing you to roll your eyes considering he was only three years older than you. “I took a psych class last semester for the credits, it was about interpersonal relationships,”

You hum. “That makes sense. At least you actually go to class and learn, I thought your stupid business major only taught you guys the primary colors and networking,”“Yah! Next time you need help with math don’t come to me,” Heeseung scolds, though his laughter bubbles through as you smile cheekily. He hits your knee lightly, rolling his eyes. “Point is, asshole, at least talk to him. You guys are good together, in some weird, gross, way that I’ll never admit to again unless you get married and I get to give a speech and talk about how I’m the reason you two met,”

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You had no idea what you were doing standing outside the Political Science building at 4pm on a Friday but here you were. You found out from Jake that Jay had a big project due today, all the fellow PolySci students dressed in formal attire had been going in and out of the building. You rocked on the heels of your feet, surprised by how many people actually took Friday classes as you refused to enroll in any from your first semester.

Apparently, Jay had to come in the extra day for a lecture and presentation and according to Jake, his portion was supposed to end at 4:15. You had no idea if he was certain, Jake was notorious for being terrible with time, hence why he was late to nearly every event you guys planned as a group.

But here you stood, awkwardly sat on one of the concrete benches under a large tree in the courtyard. You had a direct view to the main building, again you taking Jake’s word for it and praying he got all the information right.

Ten days have passed. After your talk with Heeseung, and mulling over your own ego and pettiness for a while, you woke up today feeling confident in resolving the weird limbo you were in. You figured a text would’ve been too impersonal, instead–for some god forsaken reason, your morning self was certain you could talk face-to-face without so much as a warning to Jay that you’d be coming by.

So you sat, too stubborn to run back home like you wanted but also simmering in your own pit of anxiety as time passed. Your head lifted up every time you heard the double doors creak open, you had showed up early—just in case, and practically counted down each minute.

4:16. You attempted to remain calm, restraining yourself from calling Jake and flipping out on him stating he had the wrong time.

4:17. The minutes seemed to pass quickly now. Your gaze steady on the entrance which has stayed still for the past few.

4:18. You glanced at your phone, lip tucked between your teeth nervously and you found yourself scrolling to Jay’s contact. You contemplated pressing the call button, the tightness in your chest from your nerves doing good to convince yourself that this was an idiotic plan and you should’ve asked to meet in the first place.

Just as you were about to give in, a figure casted a shadow over your own where the sun previously shone. You looked up, part of you hoping it was Jay but you were disappointed seeing a face you were unfamiliar with. A brunette stood in front of you, dressed in the formal attire you’d seen other students wear as well.

One hand held onto his backpack strap that was slung over one shoulder. The other was nervously scratching the back of his neck as he sent you a sheepish smile. “Hi,” He spoke, voice deep but shy. His eyes were light in the sun, the brown mixing into a golden hue. “I’m Park Wonbin,”

“Hi,” You respond, confused by the sudden exchange. “Lee Y/N,” You add, a polite smile on your features wishing to hurry up whatever he came over for. The suit definitely helped present himself but you could care less. You spent the last week grueling over a man, you intend to never have to do that again. “Did you need something?”

Wonbin falters for a second, eyes casting down nervously as he slips his phone from his back pocket. “You’re-uh, you’re beautiful,” He stumbles over his words, your shoulders tensing and having to refrain from visibly grimacing knowing he was attempting to ask you out. He was cute, conventionally at least, and seemed polite from how he approached, but the last thing you needed right now was a confession when you were trying to make one to Jay. “I was wondering if I could get your socials?”

Your mouth opens, then closes, unable to find the right words to let him down gently. You give him an apologetic smile, one he didn’t seem to catch onto causing you to sigh. “I’m sorry, I’m actually waiting for someone that I’m dating,”

“Dating?” He repeats.

“Exclusively,” You add, still sporting the smile but it felt more like a grimace. You let out a huff, grabbing your bag to stand up and praying you didn’t miss Jay exiting the building in the short minutes that took up your attention. Or worse, he saw, considering how jealous he was from the start. “I have to go—”

Your words were cut short once you looked past Wonbin for a split second. A few feet away, at the edge of the grass that met the concrete courtyard, Jay stood with his bag lazily draped over his shoulder and other hand tucked in his pants pocket. His hair was combed up neatly, button up shirt unbuttoned at the top three, exposing his undershirt and chain–the sleeves rolled up to his elbows and dress pants hung nicely on his hips. His eyes were narrowed, flickering between you and Wonbin who turned to follow your gaze.

“Ah, Jay-shi, hello,” Wonbin greets with a polite bow. Jay tilts his head slightly in acknowledgment, not bothering for a proper response and you wince.

Jay’s eyes traveled over him, narrowed and sharp, taking account of the phone in his hand with the familiar add contact and how close he stood next to you. They shifted to you, softening slightly but you saw the flicker, obvious annoyance and confusion seeing you standing outside his class building when you didn’t take any courses anywhere near nor did you have them on Fridays.

His gaze stayed locked on you, head tilting and your feet moved quickly to reach his side. You hesitated on linking your arm with his own, Jay arching a brow noting your nerves and you pursed your lips. With a bow, you gave Wonbin a clipped smile. “Nice to meet you,” You say quickly, wishing to be anywhere but here in the awkward stares and uncomfortable silence.

You felt Jay’s hand press to your back, urging you to get up from the goodbye he deemed unnecessary. You stood straight and he allowed his hand to hold your hip, guiding the two of you away without another word. Jay looked forward, not bothering to spare you a glance as his free hand took your bag for him to carry like second nature. You gaped, not knowing if you should speak now or explain yourself as if you’d been caught doing something bad.

“Jay I—”

“Next time be rude,” He interrupts, words clipped and filled with frustration that he was managing well. “Don’t waste your breath being polite when I’ll make sure you never have to speak to him again,”

You purse your lips, eyes staring up at him for a moment but he didn’t bother to meet your gaze. You nod, looking ahead and following his lead wherever he meant to take you. “Okay,”

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The joint was tucked between Jay’s lips, one hand on the steering wheel while the other sparked the lighter to begin burning the end of his handmade roll. His knuckles were white from how hard he was gripping the wheel, no words spoke between the two of you after he got you in the car and began driving.

Loud music blared from the speakers, the windows rolled down allowing for the cool breeze to run through your hair in a comforting mess. He didn’t bother putting on the usual playlist he knew you liked, the one filled with slow RnB and cheesy love songs, instead it was filled with rap, the type of upbeat and intense songs you assumed he mostly used at the gym to hype himself up to blow off steam.

Jay took a long puff to start the burning joint, the cloudy smoke filling the air between you though it dissipated fairly quickly with the windows down. He took another drag, sparing you glance for the first time as you rolled to a stoplight. He held his hand toward you, the spliff tucked between his fingers and you hesitantly reached out to take hold of the end but he quickly pulled away.

Your brows frowned, turning to Jay who stared back at you with an emotionless expression. He moves his hand once more, closer to your face and it registers that he was offering you a hit, but it had to be from him holding it. You leaned forward a bit, lips curling around the end and taking a deep inhale, the smoke flooded your lungs, Jay holding the joint steady even as the light turned green.

You pulled away, a small cough leaving your lips and you swore you caught the smirk that flickered at Jay’s lips as he watched you attempt to regain your composure. You gently pushed his hand away, him taking a long drag with ease causing you to roll your eyes.

“Are we gonna talk?” You finally manage, voice strained attempting to be louder than the song that blared through the speakers with heavy bass on every beat.

Jay spared you a short glance, joint tucked between his lips with a shrug. “Talk,” He says simply, you have to refrain from reacting to his obvious petty nature.

You pursed your lips, reaching for the stereo knob and turning down the music to a respectable level. “I didn’t come to get high with you,” You start. You nearly wince at the lame attempt at an ice breaker, Jay snorting at your words.

“You’ve pissed me off for the past week,” He shrugs. “If I was gonna hear you out, I needed this. Besides, I figured it would help you finally spit out whatever you came to say,”

“Well I’d rather not you be high for this,” You huff, growing annoyed with his attitude. “And I’d rather you actually be able to look at me and focus on me,”

Jay doesn’t say anything, instead he rolls his eyes. Smudging the half burned joint into the ashtray in the center consul, Jay pulled into a random shopping center. He parked the car on the far end, away from all the shops and foot traffic under a large tree, providing a sense of privacy under the golden sunlight as the sun had begun its descent.

He shuts off the engine, taking off his seatbelt and shifting so he could face you the best the seats allowed. Jay leans against the car door, an arm lazily draped over the wheel while the other combed through his disarray of hair. You purse your lips, a small sigh escaping them as you pull a leg up to sit half crisscrossed, the angle providing you to face him fully in the passenger seat.

Your hands wring together, suddenly nervous for the one thing you actually came to say. You let out a breath, eyes searching for his own but he was looking the other way. His jawline prominent, gaze focused on the trees that brushed in the breeze instead of you.

“Do you still mean what you said?”

Jay pauses. You saw the smallest quirk in his expression, brows frowning as he turned to you lazily. “I didn’t say that on a whim Y/N, I wouldn’t play with you like that,”

“Well, I don’t know. I just wanted to make sure the last week didn’t change your mind,” You shrug, fumbling with the hem of your skirt.

“10 days,” Jay corrects. You wince, knowing exactly how long it’s been but the way you put it seemed better than the emphasis. “You haven’t talked to me since,”

“Neither did you?” Your voice raises an octave, growing defensive while Jay merely hums, a humorless chuckle leaving his lips.

“I told you, you decide where this goes,”

You have to refrain from the groan that wants to leave your lips. You were terrible at touchy-feely serious conversations, that was obvious enough. “I thought about it,” You start, words slow and filled with hesitance. He watched, eyes glued on you though you couldn’t manage to meet his gaze as you stared down at your lap. “I think we both have our faults—lack of communication, fear of commitment, a hard time expressing our actual feelings when things are serious,”

Jay snorts, seemingly already knowing the downsides you were pointing out but doesn’t interrupt.

“So, I think we should work on that,” You add, the words a jumbled mess. “I like you, I do, but I want us to know more about each other. Sex and weed can’t be the only thing that connects us. I want to know about you, without having to force it out. I want you to trust me with whatever personal turmoil you have. I want to be with you, but we can’t just get together and have everything be the same. A relationship to me is more than this, I would be the person who knows you best, the darkest parts of you unapologetically and vice versa,”

Jay doesn’t say anything for a while. When you finally looked up, his eyes held your own. They flickered, searching for what to say and you shifted, embarrassed by the vulnerability and feeling small. “Okay,” he finally utters. “So we should date? Like a proper couple would, I should pursue you? A restart on the dynamic we have, no more sex until I prove to you what I feel,”

“Well—” You stutter, eyes wide and shaking your head. “I didn’t say all that—”

“But you deserve more than what we have now,” Jay interrupts. His voice was steady, clearly already made up in his head while you falter. “I’m sorry for making you feel like I didn’t trust you, like I didn’t want you to actually know me. I’ll do better with that, but if this’ll work you have to allow me to prove it and trust that I mean it. I never wanted you for just pleasure Y/N, not since the start, it was more than that for me but I didn’t know how to show it,”

You nod, the smallest amount of blush forming on the apples of your cheeks. You were nervous, heartbeat thumping through your ears and you had to refrain from hiding behind your hands. “Okay,” You manage out, avoiding his gaze that had shifted from serious to amused in an instant.

Jay leaned closer, the act alone causing you to look the other way as you acted as if the parking lot was fascinating. “Y/N,” He hums, the feeling of his breath tickling the skin by your ear, significantly closer than you anticipated causing you to flinch. He laughs, the sound overwhelming the flutter in your stomach. Jay reaches over, his hand gently tugging your chin, forcing you to look at him but your eyes squeezed shut and you could feel your face grow hot. “Look at me,”

You shake your head. You could hear the smile in his words. In the months of you two together, not once had he ever seen you like this. You were confident, sure of yourself, and rightfully so but now you seemed so shy and embarrassed. Jay couldn’t help but laugh, heart warmed at the sight considering he was the one to make you giddy like you were kids.

“I know I said no more sex but does that apply to kissing too?” Your eyes snapped open at his words, Jay sporting the prettiest smile you’ve seen and you nearly melted at the sight.

“I never agreed to no sex,” You mumble, tilting your head up with a small pout. Your faces were inches apart, the surly tone in your voice not going unnoticed and Jay raised a brow.

“Yeah?” He mumbles, the heat of his breath tickling your lips while you nod. Jay, with his hand still placed delicately along your jaw, pulls you close enough so your lips grazed as he spoke. “Too bad baby, I have to do this right,”

Your protests were interrupted by his lips meeting your own. You practically melted against him, a hand tangling to the back of his head to pull him closer and you felt his smirk against your lips. The kiss was intense, enough to say the unspoken words between you and to make up for the frustration from the past week. Your lips parted, attempting to deepen the kiss but Jay hummed, pulling away but not before nipping your bottom lip, dragging it out for a moment and placing a final chaste kiss.

A small whine of disappointment left your mouth as you attempted to pull him back but Jay shook his head. His fingers brushed a few strands of hair out of your face, your eyes fluttering open to match the sight of his blown out pupils.

“No more,” He finally says, voice raspy but certain. You pout, shaking your head but Jay doesn’t allow you to get closer. “You have to be patient baby, no more,”

You huff, slumping back into the seat with your arms folded. “Fine,” You mutter, visibly bothered while Jay couldn’t help but chuckle at the sight.

“Glad to know you’ve been missin’ me,”

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“Remind me to stop lettin’ them get you high,” Jay mumbles under his breath, hands gripping your waist to keep you from practically jumping on him. You tsk, perched on your tippy toes to place a trail of sloppy kisses up his neck.

“S’not my fault,” You whine, words whispered in his ear. “You look good, and you’ve refused to let me do anything for the past month,” You add, pulling back enough for Jay to get a proper look at you. Lips pouted and swollen, eyes blinking up at him with a doe-y look, you knew exactly what you were doing.

“You get horny when you’re high,” Jay shakes his head, thumb trailing over your lip to fix the smudged gloss but you were quick to wrap your lips around his digit instead. He lets out a breathy laugh, in disbelief at your shameless nature as he takes a quick glance around. “We’re in public Y/N,”

“No one’s around,” You mutter, the words vibrating against his finger. “Let me make you feel good, we can go back to the car,”

“You’re fucking gross,” Jay tsks, though you noted the slight rasp to his words. He pulled his hand away, instead gripping your chin to connect your lips, the kiss hard, hungry and your teeth skimmed one another but you hummed in delight. Before it could proceed, Jay pulled away, pushing himself off the wall he was leant against with you following. “Behave,” He whispered in the shell of your ear, a chaste kiss placed to your temple as he pulled you along, forcing the two of you away from the hidden bathrooms you attempted to drag him to earlier.

You huff but follow without protest. His hand stayed steady against your lower back, protective and guiding through the now more crowded corridor as you made your way back to your seats. You glanced up at him every so often, still pouting over your umpteenth failed attempt. Jay had better self restraint than you thought, even if you had an obvious effect on him and it seemed physically painful to drag you off of him, he has.

You caught a glimpse of his neck, giggling at the sight of your shimmery kiss that stayed imprinted like a tattoo and he raised a brow, silently asking what was so funny but you didn’t elaborate.

The two of you reached the lower level, your friends spotted now all there and filled in their respective seats. Jake was the first to see you both, waving overly excitedly which caught the attention of the others.

At some point, between you and Jay’s agreement to actually attempt at a relationship, your friend groups have merged. Sunoo, Jungwon, and Riki have come around more, no more snarky remarks, no more awkward conversations, but genuinely integrated with Heeseung, Jake, Sunghoon and Jay. Lara and Manon have come around too, it took a while—Jay jumping through hoops of admittedly unnecessary tests, before he got the stamp of approval to court you. There had only been one other time of your friends all coming together thus far, and today was in support of Sunghoon’s hockey game, newly promoted to team captain and Heeseung emphasized how you all had to embarrass him for his first game as captain with large neon poster papers with his face plastered to it.

Somehow, Sunghoon managed to get enough tickets for you all in the lower bowl. How he managed to get them all seated together, you had no idea but you were sure he was regretting it with Sunoo and Manon both holding up signs and screaming rather loudly to get his attention in the players bench where the team was doing their pregame talk.

Two rows your group claimed, five sitting in one and the other four directly in front. The two seats in the second row were left unoccupied beside Jake and Heeseung. “What took you guys so long?” Lara calls out over the sound of the crowd that was filling in the stadium by the second. You merely smiled, shimming past the two to your seat while Jay followed without a word.

You heard a gasp, looking back to Jungwon who pointed at Jay with a grimace. “You guys are sick,” He tuts, the rest who sat above following his gaze and each reacting similarly.

“What? What’re we looking at?” Jake suddenly butts in, peering past you over to Jay with his brows frowned.

You snicker, turning to your almost-boyfriend who smirked. He turned his head, allowing Jake and Heeseung a clear view of his neck and the trail of kisses from your assault on him earlier. Jake gapes, reaching over to give Jay a dap-up while you roll your eyes, smacking their arms away.

Heeseung shakes his head, leaning back in his seat like a disappointed father. “You bring shame to the Lee name,” You scoff, narrowing your eyes and leaning over Jake to smack Heeseung’s elbow off the armrest he was leant against.

“I know you’re not talking, we find you like a damn dog in heat every party,”

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“If he doesn’t fold tonight I think it’s a loss cause,” Lara whistles, arms folding across her front as she takes a once over your body. You smile, applying your gloss and meeting her eyes in the mirror of your vanity.

It was a rare opportunity, a new club opening up near campus and the group all agreeing to hit it together for the first time. With both Sunghoon and Riki’s birthday coming and going, it allowed for the youngest to finally tag along on a night out and an excuse for a celebration before the semester ended and the holidays occurred.

Two months, two months of (mainly) innocent touches, cheesy dates that would’ve made you nauseous thinking about last year, and Jay morphing into the most perfect man as if he were made specifically for you. Countless dates, a million acts of service, and sweet nothings—you were absolutely smitten.

You knew it was your doing, telling him to take things slow, that you wanted to get to know each other first before anything official. And he’s proven that, deep conversations in the middle of the night led to vulnerability, Jay even managing to let himself cry to you for the first time when he explained his family situation and how he started selling to ensure he had money to keep him enrolled in uni.

It was a waiting game at this point. You had no idea when, or how he’d ask, but all that was left for you was to wait for him to make the final move. You’ve mentioned it, and you’ve attempted to seduce him more than once, but he’s held off. You loved the new parts of him, the parts of him that no one else knew and you were thankful he took the time to allow you both to understand one another, but god did you miss him.

Months of the best sex you had gone in an instant was horrendous for your admittedly high libido. You didn’t know how much you depended on your beneficial relationship until then. Not to mention knowing Jay the way you did now only increased your feelings for him, you wanted him for him, not just because he was hot and packed eight inches.

So you dug through your closet, finding the skimpiest little black dress you had no business buying the second you became an adult. Far too short, fitting your curves like a second skin, and deep cut in the neckline that gave a pretty view of your perky tits that sat beautifully thanks to your trusty push up that never failed before.

It was the middle of December, you truly should not be wearing that in the midst of winter and it was obvious enough what your motive was. You didn’t care, entirely shameless and excusing the lack of covering on your body with a large, thick, leather jacket and leg warmers that matched your chunky platforms. You wouldn’t be outside long either, inside the car and club would be warm enough.

Your skin glistened under the low lighting in your room, courtesy of the body shimmer Manon brought over, and your hair cascaded down in a half-up do that Jay has complimented more than once. Your make up was equally stunning, you letting a small sigh out of content as you stood, the jewelry you slipped on earlier adding a nice addition to your outfit and exposed skin.

You gave yourself a once over in your floor length mirror, spraying your signature perfume over your heat points before smiling.

“Oh yeah, he’s done for,” Manon states matter-of-factly, coming back from the bathroom where she finished getting ready. She stood beside Lara in the doorway, both dressed up as well but it was obvious you made an emphasis on your appearance for the night. “If he doesn’t fuck you tonight, call me instead,”

“Me too,” Lara adds, the three of you falling into a fit of giggles complimenting one another. You grabbed your small clutch, the other two mirroring your actions and gathering their things for the night out.

“Ladies, are you ready?!” Heeseung’s loud voice boomed through the walls, his footsteps sounding from his room that he had been cooped up in getting ready himself.

“Yes!” The three of your voices mixed in response, another round of giggles at the mimic while you heard the front door open followed by Jake’s loud voice. You heard a series of footsteps, far too many and male voices mixing together, presumably all the guys filing into your small living room on time.

Heeseung pops his head into your bedroom door. “Okay everyone’s here let’s—” He trails off upon seeing your outfit, you smiling innocently while he frowns his brows. “What the fuck are you wearing?”

“A dress,” You state matter-of-factly. Heeseung scoffs, turning to Lara and Manon who looked the opposite way, knowing well enough he would’ve had a problem with it considering the first time you moved here and attempted at a girls night out in that very dress, he forced you to change.

“You’re wearing a piece of fabric Y/N,” He scolds, visibly uncomfortable with the little coverage on your body while you roll your eyes.

“My ass isn’t out and my tits are covered?” You point out, doing a spin to show, although rather short, the dress still covered enough. “We’re going to a club Hee, with a mob of guys including you, I’ll be fine,”

“You’re going to get us in a fight,” Heeseung shakes his head. “You’re going to get Jay in a fight,” He adds, the thought suddenly popping in his head and you see the way he perked up. “Jongseong, come here and look at what your girlfriend’s trying to wear!”

You scoff, arms folding across your front like a child ready to throw a tantrum but it only draws more attention to the swell of your breasts. Heeseung, being the ever dramatic, gags as he holds a hand up, not wanting to look at anything aside from your face.

“Why would you two let her put this on?” He asks Manon and Lara who shared a look before shrugging.

“She’s grown,” Manon says simply. Lara nods, giving you an apologetic wince as you could hear a set of footsteps echo through the apartment with Jay stepping into view.

“What’re you talking about?” He asks before reaching the doorway. His eyes pick up, immediately falling on you and doing a long trail over your figure. You shift, feeling shy all of a sudden compared to your previous confidence with everyone else, you noted the shift in Jay’s eyes before they met yours, his irises darker than before but he shakes his head. “What’s this?”

“A dress?” You repeat, although significantly less certain this time.

“A hot dress,” Lara interjects, attempting to help you save face and not give in to changing.

“She’s covered, she’s grown,” Manon nods. “Her man will be there along with a group of idiotic guys and us, who will kick anyone’s ass for touching her. Let her wear what she wants, it’s the 21st century! Just cause she has a fat ass and tits doesn’t mean she can’t wear tight clothes and people should know revealing outfits doesn’t give consent so we’ll just start a brawl if anything,” She says the words so simply, leaving no room for discussion.

You nod, thankful for your friends who had your back. Your motive was for Jay specifically, and you knew he wouldn’t let you out of his grasp anyway, but it was nice to hear reassurance.

Heeseung sighs, turning toward Jay giving him the final say. You held his gaze, his expression unreadable but you didn’t waver under the intensity. Finally, he nods, it barely noticeable but you break out into a smile.

“Perfect,” You grin, grabbing your clutch and the jacket from your bed. Manon and Lara giggle, leading the way out of your room with Heeseung rolling his eyes but guiding the group to where the others were waiting. You step out of the doorway, Jay quick to grab your waist and drag you against him.

“You’re playing dirty,” He grumbles, the words whispered against your ear while you hum.

“Not my fault you have a pretty girlfriend,” You shrug, pulling away enough to glance at his features.

Jay raises a brow. “Girlfriend?”

“Ah, right,” You tut, hand reaching up to gently pat his cheek. “Sorry, you have no actual claim on me so hopefully I don’t get too much attention later,” You say with a faux pout, stepping out of his grasp but you hear the scoff that came from Jay.

“If you keep talking shit like that we won’t end up going,” He mumbles, hand falling to your waist but not allowing you any time to respond as he guides you to the living room where the rest filled. You bit back the cheeky smile that wanted to fall upon your lips, the click of your heels gaining everyone’s attention as they were waiting on the two of you.

“Okay good! Everyone take a pregame shot together,” Jake calls out from the kitchen island, the open floor plan showing everyone huddled around him with shot glasses already filled. You felt the pairs of eyes settle on you, Jay unamused as you felt his grip on your hip tightens while he pulls you closer.

“You get two seconds to stop staring,” He calls out, voice low as he watches the pairs of eyes flicker up and around awkwardly, finding anything else to stare at. “Don’t piss me off, I know she looks good but you know better,”

Manon whistles, clapping in delight at Jay’s warning. Lara laughs along with her, Heeseung rolling his eyes and grimacing at the thought of all his friends finding his little cousin attractive. You place a hand to Jay’s chest, reassuring him it was fine.

You clear your throat, stepping to the island and grabbing the two unclaimed shot glasses in front of Jake. Holding one to Jay, you smiled at the group, clearing the uncomfortable air.

“Shots?”

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God, he should’ve made you change. It was bad enough Jay was barely managing himself as it was, but that little black dress that clung to your skin was impossible to ignore. The past hour you’ve been here, you’ve had more than a handful of eyes on you and the ego boost Jay got every time you clung to him did wonders but with the more alcohol that entered your system, the more bold you got.

You were tipsy by the time you reached the club, the pregame shots doing its job in making you feel a buzz. The fruity cocktail you had him order you along with the rounds of shots Heeseung and Jake ordered, setting you over what was the typical amount you drank.

And just like with weed, you were horny when drunk—specifically when Jay was in the vicinity. You had been dancing, a messy group of you, Manon, and Lara. Heeseung and Jake were there with your trio, but the eldest long forgotten after he found a girl for the night and Jake came back to the bar to order another drink.

Each time you returned to the claimed table your group had, you grew closer and closer to Jay. Your hands lingered, the kisses you placed going from his lips to his neck. The last time you came for a sip of your melting Mai Tai, your hand grazed over his pants, feeling his dick that reacted embarrassingly fast to your touch. You sipped from the straw innocently, even engaging in conversation with Sunoo and Riki as if you weren’t attempting to pump him under the table before you disappeared back into the crowd with Manon and Lara at your sides.

Sunghoon nudged Jay’s shoulder, beer in hand that he had been nursing since they first got here as he nodded in your direction. “You guys together yet?” He asks over the blaring music.

Jay, flickering his gaze from you for a second to glance at him, shook his head slightly. He reached for his own glass, taking a sip of the lukewarm liquid with a scrunch of his nose. “Not yet,”

Sunghoon whistles, his eyes scanning over the packed club floor for a moment. “She still need more time?”

“Haven’t asked,” Jay shrugs, the words causing Sunghoon to give him a confused look. “What?”

“Why not?” He laughs. “You guys still not having sex too? Is that why she’s all dressed up and trying to climb on top of you tonight?” Jay rolls his eyes, giving Sunghoon a warning look who merely holds his hands up showing no harm. “I’m just sayin’ man, you know she’s fine, she knows she’s fine. You need to get on that before she gets bored of waiting and finds someone else to mess with,”

“She’s the one who told me to take it slow,” Jay scoffs, suddenly defensive over your relationship as his eyes locked on you in the crowd.

“And you have,” Sunghoon agrees. “You’ve done the cute dating bullshit for the past two months, you’ve opened up to her about everything. You two seem pretty damn close so why not make it official? I’m tired of you taking hour long showers beating your dick everyday, we have one bathroom and too many people in the house,”

“It’s me, you, and Jake,” Jay snickers, finding Sunghoon’s dramatics amusing while the slightly younger of the two nods in emphasis.

“You two keep wasting all of the hot water! Jake has always taken forever but you? I know what you’re doing you sick fuck,” Jay snorts, unable to keep his laughter from bubbling over while Sunghoon lightly shoves his shoulder. “I’m serious. You’re definitely happier now too but you’re still an asshole sometimes. I think the blueballs are getting to you,”

Jay merely nods, not bothering with a defense as his eyes stay glued to your figure. Manon and Lara were dancing, bodies pressed together as Lara was rolling her hips onto Manon to the beat of the song, you yelling in delight giggling at your friends. Your hips swayed along to the music, albeit a bit sloppy due to how much alcohol you had in your system but you were having the time of your life.

Until a random guy suddenly came up to your left, far too close for comfort and you stepped to the side, still in your own little world believing he wanted to dance near you not on you. Manon was quick to catch it, pulling Lara up and Jay watched as the girls pulled you close, away from the unknown man between them. He spoke, Lara frowning her brows and holding up at hand to keep distance.

Aside from Heeseung who had disappeared not long ago, the rest of the guys sat at the table, conversing and watching the nightlife as well as you three in their direct sight. Sunoo leaned across the table, brows frowned as he looked to Jay to ensure he was seeing what they were.

He was, eyes zeroed in on the back of the guy's head but not moving quite yet. You were having fun, still unaware as you danced and Manon and Lara did good at keeping you guarded. If the man walked away, there would be no need for Jay to step in.

“Hyung?” Jungwon says carefully, brows frowning seeing Manon begin to argue with the man.

“The fuck is he doing?” Jake scoffed, words slightly slurred as he pulled himself up. Jay shook his head, standing as well to make his way over. Sunghoon followed, the most level headed as he wasn’t nearly as drunk as Jake and although he’d defend his friends for anything, it wasn’t nearly the same as it was for Jay protecting you.

The youngest three stayed at the table, keeping watch of your belongings but also ready to step in if need be. Riki shook his head, Sunoo’s brows pinched together worriedly, and Jungwon scanned to see if Heeseung was anywhere near.

Jay was bad enough, Heeseung would only add to it as he tended to be irrational when it came to you, especially while drunk.

“Get the fuck away,” Manon’s voice pulled you out of the daze you were in. You frowned, vision slightly blurry as you turned, hyperaware of the fact that you were sandwiched between your two friends though no one was happy and carefree anymore.

“She’s good,” Lara repeats, hand still up creating distance with the unfamiliar man who stood a mere foot away.

“She’s been dancing alone, I can keep her company while you two dance,” The guy offers, an innocent smile on his lips but you frown.

“She has a man,” Manon emphasizes. “She’s fine dancing with us, go away,”

“Why’s she here by herself then?” The guy snickers, looking around for anyone that would’ve been paying attention to you three. The people around you paid no mind, far too drunk and in their own groups to notice the hostility forming. “C’mon, she’s wearing a dress like that here by herself? She wants company,”

“What I’m wearing has nothing to do with you?” You scoff. Lara was quick to grab your arm, a notorious reputation in the Lee family was to pick fights when intoxicated. There’s been less than a handful of times where you actually tried to fight someone bigger than you at parties, typically when a guy was making someone else uncomfortable. “I don’t fucking know you, go away,”

“I’m just trying to have fun baby, don’t act like that,” The man’s tone changed when talking to you, appearing genuine but you rolled your eyes with visible disgust.

“Jay!” You call out, pushing out of the barrier Manon and Lara had on you. You go to move past the guy, certain that the table he’d be at was straight ahead but you’re stopped once the unfamiliar creep grabs you. “Are you fucking dumb? Get off of me!”

Manon and Lara were yelling as well, your elbow flying into the man’s face as you flailed in his hold, the hit to his nose enough for him to stumble. You didn’t have time to turn around and hit him like you anticipated, instead you felt a different pair of hands pull you back. You nearly began to yell again but you turned to see Sunghoon, his hands holding you in place by your shoulders but his eyes were focused ahead.

“What the fuck is your problem?” You heard Jake’s voice over the music. He stood in front of Manon and Lara, shoving the guy back another few steps. Jay stood in front of you, blocking your view but you could see the stiff positioning of his shoulders. “They told you to get lost and you think grabbing her is the answer?”

“Who the fuck are you?” The guy shoots back, hand holding his nose before pressing the damp blood that came from his nostril. “That bitch hit me!”

“No shit,” Jay scoffs, voice dangerously low and humorless through his dry laughter. “Your fucking lucky she’s the one who did it,” He spits while the man takes a second, eyes narrowing at Jay as he analyzed his features longer than necessary.

“Ay, hold on,” He laughs, holding up his hands to show no harm. “You’re Jay, aren’t you? You sell right? Man I haven’t seen you in a while,” The last part was quieter than the rest, the words causing Jay to roll his eyes before it clicked in realization. “That your girl? She’s strong man,”

“What’d I tell you last time Rinu?” Jay lets out an exasperated sigh. “You owe me money, and now you hit my girl? You’re begging like a bitch for me to do something,”

“I didn’t hit her,” Rinu corrects. “I didn’t know she was your girl either, she’s wearing that dress and been looking at me all night so—”

“In your fucking dreams,” You laugh, throughly baffled by his attempt to spin the blame on you. “You’re a fucking pervert who doesn’t know how to take no for an answer,”

Jay turns his head, catching a glimpse of you who struggled in Sunghoon’s grasp, standing on your tippy toes to throw insults over his figure that blocked your sight. He smirks, a hand held out for you to take and Sunghoon lets you leave his side. Jay sighs, his arm slithering around your waist and you fit perfectly into him, his hand holding you tight knowing you could pounce any second to attempt another swing.

“I’ll let your brother know,” Jay nods, the words causing Rinu’s previous smug expression to drain from his face. “I’m sure he’d be happy to handle it for me,”

“Jay, man, come on—”

“One of you wanna walk him out?” Jay interrupts, the words spoken to Sunghoon and Jake who nod in response. Sunghoon moved first, pushing Rinu forward without a word, shoving him through the crowd with Jake tagging along happily, practically bouncing on his feet to talk shit and ensure the club security knew to not let him in again.

“That was fucked up,” Manon huffs, hands running over her hair to straighten out any loose strands.

Lara nods with a sigh. “You need to stop fighting people,” She scolds, pointing a finger at you as you send them an apologetic smile.

“I knew the guys would handle it,” You defend meekly but know well enough your temper gets the best of you at times. “I’m sorry, thank you for defending me at first though. He just wouldn’t take no for an answer,”

“Yeah weirdo,” Manon scoffs. “Who was that guy?” The question was directed to Jay who still had you pulled flush against him.

“His brother used to buy from me a lot, I sold to him a few times but he started flaking on the money. I stopped selling to both of them because of it but he’s scared shitless of his brother. You can imagine how me telling him I wouldn’t sell to him because of Rinu went for them,” Jay shrugs, the old memories of him first selling popping in his head.

“Right, well hopefully his brother fucks him up then,” You mutter bitterly. You wrap your arms around yourself, the outfit you picked suddenly not as comfortable as before causing you to shy away.

The three noticed, Lara holding out her hand to give yours a squeeze. “C’mon, let’s take a break and drink a little more. Fucker ruined my buzz,”

Manon hums in agreement, the two leading the way back to the table where the last three of your group waited, practically buzzing to hear the context of what happened. Jay held you close against him, hands resting on your hips as the two of you shimmed through the crowd.

Just before you reached the table, he pulled you back and placed a lingering kiss on your shoulder. “I’m sorry he touched you,”

You pout, spinning around to face Jay as your hands cup his cheeks. “It’s not your fault, you didn’t do anything wrong,” You reassure, leaning up to place a kiss to his lips. “You guys came in time and we’re fine, let’s not let that ruin the night, okay?”

His eyes closed for a moment, basking in the feeling of your soft hands that caressed his skin. Almost instantly, the simmering anger that stayed beneath the surface began to subside, Jay letting out a breath and his head moved to place a kiss to your palm. “Stay with me for the rest of the night, yeah?”

You smile, nodding along with a little giggle escaping your lips. “You gonna show me your dance moves then, pretty boy?”

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“I’ve decided on my New Year’s resolution!” You grin, your voice carrying through the empty apartment as you waltz into the kitchen. Jay hummed, back turned to you as he stood at the stove, the delectable aroma filling your senses and you nearly went back on your word at the sight of him.

Loose pajama pants hung low on his hips, a black tank top allowed for a view of his arms and shoulders that flexed as he moved. To top it off, the messy bed head and apron over his clothes were disgustingly adorable.

“What’s that, love?” Jay calls back, not expecting you to be standing at the kitchen island so he jumps as he turns around. You smile, leant over the counter and your hair still wet from the shower you just had. The large white t-shirt you borrowed from him was damp in the areas where you pulled your hair forward, the areas see through to your breasts as you wore nothing underneath and he had to force himself to look in your eyes. The new jewelry of your piercings were cute, dazzling hearts on either side of your nipples that poked out beneath the material.

“I’ve decided,” You start, walking around the island to reach him by the stove. Jay nearly dropped to his feet, a dangerous outfit you were wearing as he shared his apartment with Sunghoon and Jake but you were told they wouldn’t be home til the afternoon. The only thing he knew you were wearing was his shirt, he prayed you weren’t cruel enough to walk through his house without your panties as well. “I’m gonna respect myself, no more messing with boys unless we’re in a committed relationship,” Jay paused, eyes narrowing at you who stood with a cheeky smile. “No more kisses, no more touching, and no more sleepovers. I’m off limits until I’m off the market starting right now,”

Jay scoffs in disbelief, turning to shut off the stove, interrupting the breakfast he was amidst making for you. Two weeks ago after the club night out, sleepovers had become a regular routine for the two of you. Nothing went further than the deep make-out sessions and dry humping that forced Jay to lock himself in the bathroom like some loser teenager. He was planning out the way to ask, waiting for the holidays to end to form an anniversary date that wouldn’t share the busy season in the future.

But you, it seems, couldn’t wait another few days. Practically forcing his hand with the no kissing no touching rules, those being his saving grace to keep himself grounded thus far. It would be impossible, especially tonight at the New Year’s Eve party you’d all be attending and the outfit he helped you pick out.

It was cruel, a low blow, but Jay had to give it to you for knowing what you want. He pulled the apron over his head, tossing it onto the counter and taking a step closer to you who still stood with the same cheeky expression, arms folded across your front and ensuring he saw the swell of your tits through the material.

“You know, I had a whole date planned,” Jay starts, you humming as a pathetic attempt to seem sad for him. He corners you against the island, arms trapping you on either side of the marble top but not close enough to touch you. “January 4th,” He sighs, tilting his head with a faux pout. “Day trip, I was gonna take you out to the beach, we’d have a picnic. I even had a necklace ready to give you and a flower order placed. Few days away from the holidays, far enough from anyone’s birthday so I’d be able to spoil you with trips for our anniversary,”

Your resolve falters hearing his words. Your lips part, unable to come up with a proper response hearing his play-by-play and how much thought he put into the day that was quite literally a dream for you. Jay tsks, eyes holding your own with no sense of remorse, instead they were amused, practically egging you on to take back your words.

“This’ll be a funny story to tell our kids, December 31st is our anniversary ‘cause your mom couldn’t wait anymore, forced my hand in asking her in my shitty college apartment,” He mimics, a snort leaving his lips at the hypothetical while your heart picks up at the mention of Jay banking on the long term with you. “You can’t say no now, tell me you’re mine and I’ll give you what you want since you’re so desperate you had to find a way to make me ruin all our plans,”

His voice was low, head dipped dangerously close to yours but he still wasn’t touching. His body invaded your space, almost suffocating but he respected your rule. Your breath hitched in the back of your throat, head tilting to feel his lips against your own but Jay clicks his tongue.

“Tell me we’re together, Y/N,” Jay hums, words raspy and practically mumbled into your mouth but he stayed far enough away to ensure they didn’t quite touch.

“Jay please,” You force out, the whine in your voice almost pornographic and your thighs squeezed together where you stood. “We can do your plan on the fourth, call it our actual anniversary but I need you,” You beg, arms trailing up and falling to his neck. You attempted to pull him closer, to reach up for a kiss but Jay stayed steady. “Please baby, it’s too much. It’s been too long, I miss you—I need you, I know you want me too so please,”

Your attempt at getting him to fold first failed. Exceptionally so but your cloudy judgment refused to let you acknowledge how utterly fucked out you sounded already, something he’d be sure to tease you about later but you didn’t care. You leaned up, straining on your tippy toes to begin a sloppy trail up his neck, sucking at a particular spot below his ear you remember being his favorite. One of your hands trailed down, grazing over the indentation of his muscles, each flexing at your touch until you reached his pants. You paused at the waistband, palm trailing down and you moaned at the feeling of his fully hard cock that was strained in the material.

You peered up at him, hand working through the pajama pants and lips pouted. “Please? Let me make you feel good Jjongie,”

He would’ve been insane to say no. Park Jongseong put up a good fight but the morality he had for your relationship was out the window as soon as you looked up at him. Months, three months he lasted, countless cold showers and growing nearly desensitized to the feeling of his own hand led to this.

“You’re such a slut sometimes,” Jay finally says, the words an insult but you grinned. One of his hands pushed you down to your knees, the other ridding his pants and underwear at once, his erect length smacking against his torso. “You missed my dick that much? Making you act dumb for it?”

You didn’t respond, eyes fixated on his pretty pink tip that was begging for a release. Jay pulled you up, shifting so you sat on his foot and he nearly laughed at the lack of underwear you had on. Your cheeks flushed with embarrassment, suddenly shy but he shook his head.

“C’mere,” Jay mumbles, a hand on the back of your head while the other guides his cock into your mouth. You licked a long strip up his shaft, tongue swirling around the head before spitting extra spit on it. You peered up at him, a smirk on his lips with heavy breaths heaving his chest. You opened your mouth, taking in his girth and you gave yourself a second to adjust but Jay had other plans.

His hips jutted forward, pushing himself deep down your throat without warning and your eyes snapped shut. He pulled back, a hand gently caressing your cheek. “You okay, pretty?”

You nod, a slight soreness beginning in the back of your throat but you loved the way he was handling you. This is what you wanted, to show how eager you were to please and for Jay to use you as he wished. Three long, bullshit months without his dick was hell, you hoped it’d never happen again.

You open your mouth, one of your hands gripping the base of his shaft as you begin to take him in again. You moved up and down, a slow but deliberate pace which allowed you to take him deeper each time. He smiled, head lulling back remembering your lack of a gag reflex as he reached the back of your throat, your cheeks hallowing and staying put for a second on your own accord.

Once you pulled out you spit the excess saliva onto his shaft, your hand pumping up and down creating a slobbery mess along his thighs as well as your chin. “Good job baby, makin’ me feel good with that pretty little mouth,” He praises, the hand on the back of your head having a light hold on your hair. He shoved his dick back into your mouth, guiding you back and forth at a pace he enjoyed and you hallowed out your cheeks, allowing for his hips to move in sync and fuck your mouth. He pressed himself all the way down, your eyes stinging with tears at the feeling of his tip pushed down your throat that clenched unintentionally.

He pulled out, a small pop sounding at suck you had on his tip. You felt him twitch, your lips quirking with a smirk knowing well enough it would be easy to get him to cum, his pent up frustration easy to unfold. You stared up at him, eyes doe-y and wide, lashes fluttering and a beautiful mess of spit that glistened from your lips and chin. You sat beneath him, back arched and shirt hiked up so he got a perfect view of your ass and pushed up tits through the still see-through shirt.

Jay doesn’t say a word, instead his arms hook around your waist and he pulls you up with ease. You yelp in surprise, the cool marble countertop causing goosebumps to arise on your skin while you stare at Jay with the same look. He leans over, a trail of kisses starting from your ankle, working his way up to your inner thigh.

“Jay,” You squirm, his series of open mouth kisses creating a circle around your heat. “Stop teasing,” You pout, hips bucking as he used one hand to push them back down.

He tsks, eyes flickering up to meet your own before placing a kiss to the top of your vulva. A loud gasp leaves your lips, head falling back but growing frustrated as he moves back to your thighs. “You’re so needy,” He hums, breath fanning against your lips as one of his fingers skims over your center. A laugh leaves his lips as reaches your hole, the collection of arousal drenching the digit enough for him to slip it in with ease.

“Oh my—” A loud moan escaped your lips, hips rolling, feeling his finger curl, the size of his hands much larger than yours and doing so much more than you ever could. Your pussy clenches around him, a measly finger enough to make you a mess and he can’t help but smirk at the sight of you pulling him in. “Fuck, fuck, please. More Jjong, please,”

Jay licks a strip up your folds, finger still inside and pumping in and out slowly. Your moans fill the room, his tongue flattening against your core, flicking up and down your clit as if he were starved. He hums against you, the vibration causing your hips to buck and legs clench, Jay forcibly holding your legs down to continue. He was good, one of the only guys to make you cum on his tongue before, but something about the desperation he was giving was intoxicating. His finger fluttered in and out of you, a second added in the mix while he practically made out with your clit. Licking, sucking, listening to your reactions and curling his fingers hitting just the right spot.

“Oh fuck,” You rush out, hands finding his hair and tangling through the strands. “Oh my god, baby, please don’t stop,” Your hips bucked, moving in sync with his mouth that refused to come up for a breath of air. His nose nudged against your clit every so often, tongue swirling up and down with his fingers pumping in you at an overwhelming rate. A loud moan escaped your lips, your walls clenching around his digits and Jay continued to lick your clit slowly, ensuring your orgasm road out as long as it could as your legs closed due to the sensitivity.

When he finally pulled away, the bottom portion of his face was wet with your slick. He gently pulls his fingers out of you, making sure to suck the drops of you clean before he stood up. Your eyes met his own, pupils blown out and heavy breaths filling the space between you.

“You okay?” He asks softly, leaning over your body and placing a kiss to your lips. You hum against him, tongue swiping against his own and you felt his smile. “Good, we’re not done yet,” He mumbles, the feeling of his shaft swiping up your slick folds causing you to gasp. He smears the precum off his tip, giving his dick a few pumps as he grazes the tip against your pussy.

“You’re so pretty baby,” Jay praises, one hand squeezing your hip while the other guides his tip to your hole. Gasps left each other's lips, your eyes half-lidded as you stared up at him. His hips push forward, pushing himself further into you at a dangerously slow pace. Your pussy clenches around him all the way until he bottoms out, stilling for a moment to gain his composure. “Fuuck, I’ve missed you,” He mumbles, head tilting back and eyes shut in pleasure.

Your moans fill the air between you, your hips moving to create some type of friction causing him to hiss. “H-hold on baby,” Jay stutters, eyes still shut and you see the way he forced himself to hold back. His chest heaved with heavy breaths, your hand trailing down his prominent muscles with a pout. “I haven’t felt you in a while, gonna make me cum too fast,” He explains in a hushed voice, gaze meeting your own and noting the smirk that picked up on your lips.

“Guess you’ll just have to give me more than one then,”

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Three rounds. Three you managed in under two hours. One in the kitchen, one in the bedroom, and one in the shower attempting to clean up from the other two. It was a record for the both of you, the urgency due to how pent up you both were along with the fact you wanted to finish before either Jake or Sunghoon had come home.

Jay had just finished cleaning up the kitchen when the pair walked in. The two complained about the windows having been opened in the midst of winter but Jay snorted back stating it was either be cold or them coming home to the smell of sex.

There was a series of yells, disgusted by the fact that the two of you fucked somewhere in the shared space before shifting to thanks of a higher being for Jay getting pussy for the first time in months. Jake had personally come to thank you, wishing you a happy sex life so his best friend wouldn’t be a “pent up prick all the time.” The conversation then shifted to congratulations on your relationship, genuinely happy for the two of you and boasting that they were the first to know but you shut them down before they could text the group chat and wreck havoc.

Jay explained, with minimal details, that your anniversary would technically be the fourth. Sunghoon snorted at the fact that you both were too horny to wait but also stated how utterly stupid it was to wait until you were a couple in the first place considering you had been fucking for a long time prior.

Now here you were, sitting in the passenger seat comfortably lacing your fingers with Jay’s who drove. Meanwhile, Manon, Lara, and Sunoo were crammed in the back. The other half of your group crammed in Sunghoon’s car—though Jungwon volunteered himself as the DD so he drove for the night.

“You guys make me sick,” Manon huffs, tossing the empty water bottle she had been hydrating with in your direction.

You sent her an innocent smile, tossing the bottle back as Sunoo and Lara laugh at the sight. You hear Jay’s chuckle, his eyes flickering from the rear view mirror to see Manon’s finger flick you off but you paid her no mind. You smiled at him, this time genuine and he spared you a glance as you rolled to a spotlight. He peered to the backseat, a smirk forming on his lips before leaning in, placing a chaste kiss to your lips earning a series of grumbles and gags from the back.

You looked to the front, the light still red and you took the opportunity to pull Jay back. You connect your lips once more, his smile felt against your lips and your free hand holding up the middle finger in response to your friends who groaned with dramatics.

He pulled away as the light flickered green, instead lacing your hand with his own and placing a kiss to your knuckles.

“Sick!” Manon huffs.

“Wait, when’d you get this bracelet?” Sunoo suddenly asks, pointing to you and Jay’s interlocked hands, the dazzling sparkle of your newly gifted tennis bracelet shining in the nightlight.

Lara hums, patting Sunoo’s shoulder. “I forget you went home for Christmas,” She giggles, wiggling her brows suggestively. “It was her present from Jay,”

“Along with a Prada bag and a gazillion new make up items,” Manon snorts, you sticking her tongue out at her which she mirrors.

“I also got her lingerie,” Jay adds nonchalantly. You gape, smacking his shoulder while he laughs. Lara gasps, the final gift being unknown while Sunoo cringes.

“Was it cute?” Manon asks and you nod.

“Hot,” You smirk. “I’ll show you guys later, it’s comfortable too,”

Jay whips his head at the mention of you sharing his outfit choice. You giggle, rubbing his shoulder reassuringly while the girls snicker from the back.

“Sorry Jay, before you there was us. We got all the nudes and pre-approved them,” Lara shrugs.

“I literally pierced her nipples,” Manon snorts. “You’re welcome for that by the way,” Your eyes widened, Sunoo choking on his spit in the corner where he sat.

Jay stiffened, sparing you a glance while you fumble for your words. “Manon!” Was the best you could come up with, voice an octave higher and Lara laughing from her seat in the middle.

Manon pauses, turning to Sunoo and wincing. “Sorry?” She offers. “I forgot not everyone here has seen you naked, my bad,”

“Naked?” Jay interjects.

Lara sighs, patting his shoulder with a shake of her head. “We’re girls Jongseong, this is normal, don’t take it personal,”

Manon hums in agreement, you smiling sheepishly as he glances at you. You shrug, pulling his hand closer toward your chest.

Sunoo, now knowing far too much information about the three of you, wished he switched places with Riki earlier. Jay doesn’t say anything for a moment, stiff silence falling over the car before he smirks.

“Good job on the piercings,”

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“Do I have to piss on your leg like a dog or what?” Jay scoffs, allowing you to drag him away from the random guy who attempted on hitting on you after he disappeared to the bathroom for two minutes. You snort, shaking your head and guiding your way through the sea of people.

There was a surprising amount at the frat party. You would’ve assumed most would’ve been home for the break, but that didn’t stop the house from being filled to the brim and everyone packed in like sardines. Loud music blared throughout, the sound traveling to the backyard where your seats were left.

Jungwon, Riki, and Sunghoon sat in the far corner around the fire-pit that was claimed early on in the night. You and Jay being the only couple, choosing to shy away from the crowd inside, were joined by each due to their introverted nature or simply because they didn’t want to deal with the scene inside.

You made your way back, settling into your seat, well Jay’s even though you had your own but he refused to have you anywhere aside from his lap. You were covered up, outfit certainly more acceptable for the cold weather and snuggled into his embrace. You felt him shift beneath you, a familiar baggy being pulled from his jacket causing you to raise a brow.

“I said I’d stop selling this new year, not smoking,” Jay winks, placing a kiss on your temple as you roll your eyes. The lighter igniting caught everyone’s attention, Jay helping you start with the first puff, the smoke filling your senses with a deep inhale. Jay lifted his gaze, glancing over at Jungwon and Riki. “You guys smoke?” He asks as he takes a hit of his own, passing the joint to Sunghoon.

Jungwon shakes his head, Riki holds up his puff bar instead that he pulled from his pocket. Your eyes light up, seeing the pretty light pink vape and Jay shakes his head knowing you were enticed by the color. “What flavor is that?”

“Peach-guava,” Riki answers, rolling his eyes at Jungwon who snorted at the fruity flavor. He passed the bar to Sunghoon, who exchanged the joint to him before handing it over.

You grin, taking a deep inhale and instantly feeling the smoke flood your senses. The fruity smell mixed with the flower, Riki taking his first hit from the joint with a cough immediately leaving his lips. Sunghoon hold out his half empty water bottle to the youngest, you blowing out a long puff of air directly in Jay’s face as he grimaced.

You giggle, enjoying the flavored air and hold the vape for Jay to try. Him shaking his head, gently pulling the puff bar from your hands to make its way back to Riki. “I don’t like nic,” Jay mumbles, scrunching his nose at the fruity air that still lingered.

“Baby,” You tease, sticking out your tongue while Jay rolls his eyes.

“Shits nasty,” He says simply. “It’s worse for you too,”

“Oh and smoking weed like a habit isn’t?” You snort.

“It’s not as bad as long as you’re not addicted,” Sunghoon chips in, taking a long drag from the joint before it finally reaches you and Jay. You pout with a small huff. Jay smiles, his arm tightening around you to pull you closer.

He lifted the spliff to his lips, taking an inhale before leaning up, his lips ghosting against your own to exhale the smoke in your mouth. You smile, connecting your lips fully as Jay hums against you.

“Gross,” Jungwon boos, Sunghoon and Riki chuckling at the sight of you two.

“Shut up man,” Jay teases, lifting the joint to your lips for a puff. You oblige, maintaining the eye contact that Jay forced himself to break, swallowing hard causing you to smile.

You placed a chaste kiss to the shell of his ear. “Another round before the new year?”

· · ─ ·✶· ─ · · ─ ·✶· ─ · · ─ ·✶· ─ · · ─ ·✶· ─ · · ─ ·✶ ─ · ·

“Fuck, baby, you’re so pretty,” Jay groans, feeling your slick against him as you grind your hips down on his shaft. The two of you managed to slip away from the others twenty minutes ago, giving yourself thirty minutes before midnight when they’d be sure to come looking for you.

Perched in the backseats of Jay’s car, you had just pulled yourself up from giving him head. Your legs wrapped around his waist, you naked aside from your panties that were pulled to the side while Jay still had his shirt on and pants pooled down at his ankles.

Jay, ever the courteous, was kind enough to lay down a spare blanket he had tucked away in the trunk months ago after a day trip to the beach with the guys, considerate of your friends who would be making their way home with you later on.

His hands trail up your skin, the dim lighting from the street lamp being the only illumination in the car parked along the quiet street aside from the frat house in full swing. Jay pulled you closer, arm wrapped around your waist and shifted so he was able to take one of your nipples in between his lips. Your head lulled back, humming in delight feeling his tongue swipe against the cool metal bar, toying with your piercing and his other hand gently rolled the other nub between his finger tips.

You lifted your weight off his lap momentarily, hand falling to his hard shaft and guiding the tip between your lips. You smile, feeling him hum against you, the pool of arousal between your legs more than enough lubricant as you slowly inched down on his dick. Breathy moans fill the air, your eyes pinching shut at the fullness and Jay’s grip on your hips tightening. You stilled as you bottomed out, allowing you both a second to settle at the feeling of his cock buried all the way inside you.

Your hips rocked, slowly at first. The curve of his dick hitting just right, tip kissing your cervix and clit rubbing against his pelvis creating more friction. You couldn’t remember the last time you rode him, making a mental note to do so more often and Jay’s half lidded eyes stayed focused on you. His hands stay put on your waist, guiding you back and forth, encouraging you to move against him at a consistent pace.

You felt him twitch, your eyes opening to see Jay fixated on your stomach. You roll your hips, moaning at the feeling but Jay presses his palm against your lower abdomen, the feeling causing the fullness of his dick to increase.

“Oh fuck,” He breathes out. “I’m all the way in you, huh?” He smirks, the belly bulge something new he hadn’t seen before and couldn’t help but boost his ego at the sight.

You let out a breathy laugh, lifting your hips slightly before pushing back down. Jay moans, the sight of him filling you euphoric, his hands helping guide you up and down, slow at first, deliberate with each stroke before his hips began to meet you halfway. The lewd noises of your skin hitting filled the car, the wetness between you heard, your arousal dampening your thighs.

“Jay,” You moan, tits bouncing along to each stroke, palms pressed to his chest, nails digging into his skin with the recoil of your ass hitting his hips. “Feels so deep,” You add, words mumbled together in a jumbled mess.

A phone rings through the hot air between you. A groan leaving your lips as you fumbled behind your back, picking up the buzzing phone without a glance at the screen for Jay to answer. You stopped bouncing on his dick, giving yourself a small break as he held the device up to his ear.

“What’s up?” Jay asks without a hitch, voice steady but his eyes stay glued to your body. His free hand sat at your waist, rolling your hips forward against his own as your eyes widened, biting back a muffled moan. “We’re a little preoccupied,” He answers after a beat, loud voices jumbling together and you watch the smirk form on his features. From the smug tone of his voice, and the coincidence of the both of you disappearing without explanation, it didn’t take a genius to know what you two went off to do.

He juts his hips forward, skin slapping together creating a clap and your hand flies up to your mouth. He pulls the phone away for a split second, the same cheeky smile on his features as he winks. “Yeah we’ll meet you guys after,”

You heard a series of voices, no doubt your friends and in particular hearing Manon scream through the speaker that Jay winced at. He rolls his eyes, ending the call and tossing the phone beside him on the backseats. “Always interrupting us,” He tsks playfully, hands helping you bounce up and down and hips meeting your own at an equal rhythm. You smiled, though it didn’t last as moans fell from your lips, his name repeated like a prayer while Jay leaned forward, one hand falling to your clit and managing to capture one of your tits in his mouth, tongue circling around your nipple and sucking with a pop.

“Good job baby,” Jay praises, heavy breaths leaving his lips. Your eyes squeeze shut, palms pressed to his chest and he could feel your pussy clench around him. “There you go, make yourself cum on my dick, yeah?”

“Mhmm,” You mewl. A whine comes from your lips, the familiar pit in your stomach tightening and the feeling of his cock hitting deep into your cervix was enough to push you over the edge. You could hear Jay’s heavy breathes, each becoming more shallow, his grip tightening on your body, and quiet moans followed the feeling of your walls that clenched around him.

“Fuck, oh my—fuck, Jay please,” You hips jut down, stopping the in and out thrust to instead feel every inch of his dick buried all the way inside you. You rock yourself back and forth, fast and deliberate, chasing the pleasure while Jay couldn’t help himself, eyes ravishing the way you used him, the sight of your tits bouncing in his face and the fucked out look you sent him was enough.

Almost simultaneously, you tense, body shaking and pussy clenching with a loud series of moans. Feeling your own orgasm, the heat that flooded within you added to the euphoric feeling, the twitch of Jay’s dick buried inside you—shooting out hot beads of cum directly in your cunt, was overstimulating in the best way possible.

“Good job pretty girl,” Jay pants, head thrown back against the seats, hands gripping your thighs stopping your body from bucking, legs tense against his own. “You did so well, such a good girl f’me,”

You slump against his body, head buried in the crook of his neck with his arms wrapped around your waist. The slight sweat on your bodies ignored, pressed against one another as close as humanly possible as you regain your breath. “M’tired,” You mumble, words whispered against his skin and Jay laughs lightly.

“I know my love,” He agrees, a hand soothingly trailing up and down your back. A lingering kiss was placed to your cheek, sweet and innocent, filled with more than lust from before. You turn your head slightly, enough so your faces are centimeters apart but able to look at Jay. His eyes were glossy, a certain fondness in his gaze that you couldn’t help but smile at. “What’s so funny?” He tsked, though he sported a toothy grin of his own at the sight of your glowing state.

“You like me,” You giggle, a little delirious but entirely satisfied with the childish statement. He chuckles, nodding once with another short peck to the tip of your nose.

“I do,” he confirms. “You like me too,”

“I do,” You repeat, the same giddy expression on your features. Jay hums, his gaze flickering away from you after a moment. Silence fills the car, your steady breaths mixing but your eyes stay trained on Jay, at first merely admiring his features in the dim lighting, but you felt a subtle shift in his demeanor.

If you didn’t know him so well, you could’ve missed it. So you sat up slightly, your finger reaching out to poke the dimple in his cheek, pulling him out of the daze where he was staring out the car window. He blinks, shaking his head and gently moving your hand away from his face, lacing your fingers together instead.

“What’s wrong?” You ask, words quiet and soft, as if you spoke too loud it would break the bubble you were in. Jay hums, shaking his head with a small smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes. You frown, sitting up entirely to look at him properly. “Jay,”

“Nothing baby,” He reassures, though it did little to help the visible nervousness in his eyes. You tilt your head, completely disregarding the fact that he was practically cock warming you, and entirely ready to have a proper conversation. “I promise, s’nothing important,”

“We just had insanely good car sex but you look worried instead of relieved,” You deadpan. “It’s important now. Talk to me Jjong, you know I’d rather know than you let it fester alone,”

Jay pauses, taking a deep breath as his eyes shut. The hand interlocked with your own squeezing tighter, as if he were afraid you’d slip through his fingers. “Is…” He begins, a slight crack in his voice and you frown. Jay opens his eyes to meet your own, the visible glossiness holding back tears which causes you to react immediately, your free hand brushing against his cheek as you urge him to continue. “Would it scare you away if I told you I love you?”

You pause, mouth parting agape in surprise. Your heart begins to thump in your chest, loud enough you were sure he could hear it too. “You’re not just saying that out of post-nut delusions, right?” You mumble, lamely attempting to lighten the air between you, giving Jay the room to take back his words but he shook his head.

“I know we only agreed to something real a few months ago,” He starts, a nervous smile playing at his lips but his words stay steady. “And we’re not technically official,” Jay snickers, shooting you a pointed look while you laugh, the nervousness in your expression obvious and you could feel the lump in your throat growing. “But we’ve been doing, whatever this is, for a year. It’s been you for me from the start, and I think with me finally pursuing you in the way I should’ve a long time ago allowed for clarity,”

Your vision grew blurry, tears pooling at the corners of your eyes that mirrored Jay’s. The confession was vulnerable, you felt shy and entirely too nervous to function but the warmth that spread in your stomach let you know that the inkling of fear was a good thing.

“I’m not expecting you to say it back,” Jay says quickly, a deep breath leaving his lips as if it were out of relief. His hand reaches up, fingertips grazing against your skin and pushing away the strands of hair that fell into your gaze. “Trust me—I’ve been thinking about it. A lot,” He admits, you letting out a watery laugh as he smiles. “It popped in my head one day, it felt dumb at first. But since then every time we were together, every time I thought about you, every time we said goodnight it was like a reflex, it feels right,”

You were at a loss for words, staring back at Jay with the start of tears beginning to dance down your cheeks. It was overwhelming, and you’d be sure to look back on it one day and laugh at the fact that your first ‘I love you’ came after a rendezvous in the car on New Years but for now, it was perfect.

“Who knew Mr. Bad Reputation could be such a softie, crying as he confessed his undying love for me?” You giggle, allowing for Jay to brush away your tears with the pads of his thumb. He rolls his eyes, wiping away the stray few that managed to escape the corners of his own but he stared back at you with the same fondness. “You love me, Park Jongseong?”

“I love you, Lee Y/N,” He confirms, the words soft but clear. You couldn’t help the smile that fell on your features, leaning forward to place a long, lingering kiss to his lips that you felt Jay grin against.

“I guess I love you too,” You tease, words mumbled against his skin and Jay snickers, arms wrapped around you keeping you close. Your hands tangled in his messy hair, basking in the warmth between you with small, innocent kisses shared between you.

A ping echoed simultaneously from your phones. The brightness from the screens lit up the dim car, both your eyes falling to Jay’s phone which was still placed beside him, a new message from the shared group chat between your friends the cause. But you paused, noting the time displayed at the top of the screen. Jay, seemingly reading your mind, sent you a heart stopping grin.

“Happy New Year, Jjong,”

“To many more nights like this, pretty girl,”

[rainstormies]

Second Door on the Right | Eddie Munson

pairing: eddie x r!little sister's friend

word count: 3,1k

summary: best friends with his little sister, you’re stuck hiding a secret crush on Eddie - the ‘black sheep’ older brother who never sees you as more than family

best friend's brother | summer romance

1 | 2

The sound of pencil scratching was the only noise in Julie Munson’s room — besides the quiet hum of her Lisa Frank radio tuned to a Top 40 station and the occasional sigh from your side of the bed. You were both knee-deep in algebra, legs tangled in fuzzy blankets, notebooks spread out like an academic crime scene.

“I swear,” Julie groaned, flopping back dramatically, “if I ever use the quadratic formula in real life, I’ll personally mail Mr. Lawson a handwritten apology.”

You smiled, erasing a wrong answer. “He’d probably thank you for it.”

Julie laughed, tossing a gummy bear at you. You caught it in your mouth.

It was easy, being her best friend.

Julie was the kind of girl who knew every word to every Avril Lavigne song, had glitter nail polish on rotation, and wore way too much strawberry-scented body spray. You were different — a little quieter, maybe not as sure of yourself, not as pink-and-sparkly. But with Julie, it never felt like too much or not enough. Just… different.

That’s probably why you spent more time here than anywhere else.

The Munsons’ house was warm in the way older homes were — all creaky floors and mismatched furniture. There was something comforting about the chipped paint on the banister and the smell of laundry detergent mixed with whatever candle her mom had burning downstairs.

The only part that didn’t feel warm was Eddie.

Julie’s older brother. The infamous weirdo.

He was two years ahead of you — a senior now — all chains and boots and hair too long for your parents’ taste.

Julie called him “a total freak.” You weren’t supposed to listen to his band’s tape. “Too loud, too weird.”

But sometimes, when Julie was in the bathroom and you were waiting, you’d press play on the worn tape deck near her desk. Just for a second. Just to hear the sounds he made.

You’d never say it out loud — but you thought it sounded like something real.

Tonight, the house was unusually quiet. Their parents were out. Julie’s mom had made lasagna and left it in the oven with a note: “Don’t burn the house down. Be nice to your brother.”

You didn’t ask.

Julie leaned toward the window. “Is that his van?”

Sure enough, the rumble of a familiar engine pulled into the driveway. The headlights swept across the front lawn, briefly illuminating the floral curtains before going dark.

Julie groaned. “Ugh, he better not stink up the hallway with that gross cologne again.”

You hid a smile, scribbling the last answer on your worksheet.

Heavy boots on the stairs.

A door creaked open — then slammed.

His, definitely.

Julie rolled her eyes. “Swear he was adopted.”

You shrugged. “You don’t look that different.”

Julie gagged in response. “Gross.”

There was a pause. Then—

“I’m gonna grab something to drink. Want anything?”

“Water?”

“Coming up.”

Julie padded out, leaving the door ajar.

You sat back against her pillows, stretching. The hallway light spilled into the room in a soft line across the carpet. You could hear her footsteps downstairs, faint.

And then… another door opened.

You glanced up.

Eddie.

Fresh from whatever band thing he’d been at — hair messy, boots unlaced, rings glinting in the low light. He was halfway down the hall, a towel thrown over his shoulder, rubbing at a spot on his jaw that looked freshly bruised.

He didn’t see you at first.

And when he did — when his eyes landed on you, half-tangled in blankets and bathed in glow-in-the-dark stars stuck to his sister’s ceiling — he paused.

For once, no smirk.

Just a blink.

“Didn’t know you were over,” he said, voice low and rough from yelling over amps or maybe from late nights and cheap cigarettes.

You tried to sound normal. Cool. Unbothered. “Homework night.”

He nodded slowly. Leaned against the doorframe.

“You like math?”

“Not really.” You shrugged. “Julie hates it more.”

That got a grin. “No surprise there.”

There was a beat of silence.

You couldn’t stop your eyes from drifting — the fading bruise, the string of bracelets on his wrist, the band tee you didn’t recognize.

“New shirt?” you asked before you could stop yourself.

His eyebrow ticked up. “Noticed that, huh?”

Your cheeks burned.

God.

“Looks… cool,” you added, trying not to sound like you cared.

“Thanks, Princess.”

The nickname had no bite to it tonight. Just something soft. Familiar. Almost affectionate.

Julie came thudding back up the stairs, breaking the moment. She glanced at Eddie and scowled. “Don’t you have a dungeon to crawl back into?”

Eddie gave you one last look.

“I’m going,” he said, backing into the bathroom. “Don’t spill glitter in the hallway again, I swear to god.”

Julie huffed and shoved the door closed.

Your heart was racing and you didn’t know why.

No — you did.

You just didn’t want to admit it yet.

You don't fall asleep right away.

Julie was out the second her head hit the pillow — muttering something about how algebra had personally wronged her. Her breathing evened out quickly, soft and rhythmic, and you lay there next to her, staring at the glow-in-the-dark stars she never bothered to peel off the ceiling.

They looked more real with the lights off.

The hum of the house was different now. Calmer. The occasional creak of the floorboards, the low whir of the box fan in the corner. Outside, crickets sang like they didn’t know tomorrow was the last day of school.

You thought about Eddie.

You didn’t mean to.

It wasn’t the first time you’d stayed over. Wasn’t the first time you heard him come home, the way the whole house seemed to shift under his boots, like he moved in a different rhythm than the rest of the world. But tonight was different.

He hadn’t called you Princess in weeks.

And somehow, it made your chest feel weird.

You turned toward Julie, asleep in her pink unicorn pajamas, mouth slightly open.

“Hey,” you whispered. “You awake?”

No answer.

You reached for the tape player beside her bed and hit play. Madonna, soft and muffled. You turned it down to almost nothing.

Somewhere in the hallway, a door creaked.

Then shut.

Maybe he was still awake.

You turned over again and stared at the ceiling until the sun started rising.

It was hot by the time you left school.

Sweaty backpacks, melting lip gloss, pencils snapped in celebration. You and Julie walked home in a tangle of limbs and laughter, shoes kicking dust up off the sidewalk.

“Three whole months,” she said dramatically, flinging her arms out like she might fly. “Three months of no Mr. Lawson, no homework, no waking up at 7am — this is better than Christmas.”

You smiled, tugging your ponytail tighter. “You say that now. By August you’ll be bored out of your mind.”

She shot you a glare. “Blasphemy. I have plans.”

“Oh yeah?”

“Uh, yeah. Pool days, mall trips, making out with Nick if he ever calls me back…”

You laughed.

“And,” she added, “you, me, and Hawk Theater. Every weekend. Deal?”

“Deal.”

By the time you reached the Munson house, the sun had turned the metal railing by the steps too hot to touch. You followed her inside, backpacks thunking onto the floor. The place was quiet — her mom’s car gone, probably at the store.

Eddie’s boots were by the door.

Julie noticed too. “Ugh. He better not be hogging the living room again.”

You opened the fridge, grabbed two root beers, and bumped it shut with your hip.

Julie flopped onto the couch, feet kicked up over the armrest. “We should go see that movie I told you about — the one with the aliens?”

You raised a brow. “The one that’s definitely rated R?”

She grinned. “My cousin’s older than he looks. He can get us tickets.”

You handed her a drink. “So, illegal?”

“Totally worth it.”

From the hallway, the sound of footsteps. You looked up just in time to see Eddie — shirtless, towel around his neck, water bottle in hand. Hair messy like he’d just showered.

You froze. He glanced your way and smirked.

“Ladies,” he drawled.

Julie groaned. “Do you own shirts anymore?”

“Not in summer, I don’t.”

He didn’t linger. Just grabbed something from the counter and disappeared back toward the stairs.

Julie cracked open her soda. “You’d think he was auditioning for a Whitesnake video.”

You didn’t say anything. Just took a sip and stared at the blank TV screen, hoping your face wasn’t red.

That night, you stayed over again.

Julie had begged. “We have to start summer right.”

So you packed a bag. Again. And she let you steal one of her extra toothbrushes. Again. You both ate popsicles on the porch in the fading light and made a list of everything you were going to do that summer:

Pool days (minimum 12)

Mall runs (must include frozen yogurt)

Sleepovers (non-negotiable)

Secret movie nights

Maybe find cute boys

That last one was Julie’s idea. She wrote it in big capital letters. You didn’t argue. You just bit your lip and thought about how she'd react if you had put Eddie's name next to it.

By the time the moon was high, the list was taped to her mirror, and you were curled up under the same blanket, your feet pressed together like you were twelve again.

You heard him come upstairs.

Felt the quiet of his steps this time.

Not stomping. Not clunky. Just… slow.

You closed your eyes and pretended not to listen.

And when you dreamed, it wasn’t about the pool or the mall.

It was the hallway.

The soft knock on your door that never came.

The sound of your name whispered like a secret, just once.

The door opening.

And his eyes.

Always his eyes.

The pool was packed.

Lawn chairs cluttered like forgotten furniture, kids cannonballing into the deep end, boom boxes wheezing out Van Halen and Madonna in equal measure.

You were still toweling off your legs when Julie returned with two giant Slurpees and a fresh wave of indignation.

“I swear to God,” she huffed, flopping down beside you on the cracked white chair, “Nick’s gonna give me a brain bleed.”

You took your drink without protest.

“What happened now?” you asked, already smiling.

She sucked her straw dramatically. “Okay, so first he’s all ‘we should hang out later’ — like, okay, duh, it’s summer. But then he’s like, ‘not sure what time though, my cousin might come over’ and I’m like… is this a date or a group project?”

You laughed. “Maybe he’s just awkward.”

“Awkward I can handle,” Julie said, adjusting her sunglasses. “But this is mixed signals. This is Morse code from hell.”

You hummed in agreement, barely listening now — because across the pool, just past the diving board, Eddie was laughing. Shirtless, wet curls tied back, black swim trunks clinging low on his hips. His tattoos looked darker in the sun, like they’d soaked up all the heat and made it part of him.

His friends were with him — a blur of noise and long limbs. One of them did a backflip off the diving board that earned an actual applause.

Eddie didn’t notice you watching.

But Julie did.

She followed your gaze, peeking over the rim of her shades. “Ugh. Them.”

You blinked. “What?”

She nudged you with her elbow. “You need a summer romance. Like, real bad.”

You choked on your drink. “I do not.”

“You do too.” She kicked her feet up. “We should find you a guy. Not Nick — he’s too flaky — but like… someone who plays guitar and has good hair.”

You stared down into your cherry slush.

“And definitely not Eddie,” she added without missing a beat. “Because, ew.”

You smiled like it was funny.

Like it didn’t sting more than you expected.

Julie leaned back and closed her eyes like the sun might solve all her boy problems. “God, my life is so tragic.”

You didn’t answer. Not right away.

Your eyes flicked back to the far end of the pool, where Eddie now sat at the edge, bare feet in the water, hair dripping down his shoulders. He leaned back on his hands, laughing at something the guy next to him said, and your stomach flipped like someone had kicked it off the diving board.

You’d told yourself it was nothing. Just a phase. A dumb little thing — the way your ears perked up when he talked, the way you remembered dumb things he said weeks later, the way he smelled like tobacco and shampoo and something warm underneath it all.

But sometimes… sometimes you wondered if it was more.

And sometimes, like now, it hurt to know he’d probably never see you that way. Not when you were just Julie’s friend. The one who wore matching pajamas and snuck Oreos from the kitchen at midnight.

You were the hallway he passed through to get to his room.

Not a destination.

You took another sip of your drink and stared straight ahead. “Yeah,” you said finally. “Definitely not Eddie.”

But your eyes betrayed you.

And across the pool, his met yours — just for a second.

And then he looked away.

And you tried not to hope that maybe, just maybe…

…he was thinking about you too.

The house was quieter than usual.

No TV humming from the living room, no pots clanging in the kitchen, no Julie yelling your name to help her pick an outfit she’d already decided on.

You padded barefoot down the upstairs hallway, arms crossed against the muggy air.

The A/C was busted again. Mr. Munson had sworn he’d call someone about it, but the only thing colder than the vents was his sense of urgency.

You’d gone in search of something cold to drink — maybe a popsicle, maybe something sweeter — when you passed by Eddie’s door, half-shut between the bathroom and the linen closet.

And stopped.

There was music playing low inside — Sabbath or Dio, something murky and metallic — and a faint golden light spilled onto the hallway floor from the cracked doorframe.

You should’ve kept walking. Should’ve gone straight to the kitchen.

But then you heard the pencil.

Scratch, pause, scribble.

Curiosity tugged at your heel.

You stepped closer, careful not to creak the floorboards, and peeked inside.

Eddie was hunched at his desk, back to the door, a foot tucked under him, pen moving in frantic little bursts across a notebook. His hair was down again — dark curls brushing the collar of a faded Corrosion of Conformity shirt — and his stereo crackled faintly beside him, the low buzz of guitar filling the room.

You opened your mouth without thinking.

“Is that… a goblin with a mohawk?”

He didn’t startle much. Just turned, slow and curious, pencil still in hand.

“Technically,” he said, tilting the page your way, “it’s a bloodthirsty goblin prince with a tragic backstory and a taste for vengeance.”

You laughed softly, leaning against the doorframe. “Ah. My mistake.”

His smile pulled easy and crooked — not the kind he gave at school, all performative and exaggerated. This one was quieter.

“Julie’s friend. You're here again.”

You arched an eyebrow. “Eddie. You're also here again.” You said in reply.

He gave a mock gasp. “You remembered my name. I’m touched.”

You rolled your eyes, but your smile stayed.

There was a pause. Not awkward. Just full.

The kind of silence that made you feel like something was about to happen — even if it didn’t.

“What’s it for?” you asked. “The sketch.”

“Campaign,” he said. “New storyline I’m working on. Politics, cursed forest, lots of weird magic shit. Should keep ‘em busy for a while.”

You let your eyes drift to his desk — the notes, the tiny painted miniatures, the barely-hanging-in-there shelf above it stacked with books, cassette tapes, and a photo cracked along the frame. Him and Julie. Probably first day of school. He had the same wild curls even then, just shorter. Less tamed.

“You ever play?” he asked.

“I tried once,” you said, snorting. “There was this group at the library. One guy made me a wizard and then got mad when I wouldn’t pretend to fall in love with his elf.”

Eddie barked a laugh — loud and honest.

“Oh, hell no,” he said. “You deserve reparations for that. On behalf of all Dungeon Masters, I offer you free snacks and a proper character arc.”

You grinned. “I’ll consider it.”

He watched you. Not in a creepy way — just kind of… curious. Like he didn’t expect you to still be standing there.

“You always this funny?” he asked.

You shrugged. “Only when I’m not being called Julie’s sidekick.”

“That’s unfair,” he said, tilting his head. “You’re more like her secret weapon. Don't know how she'd survive without you.”

The compliment caught you off-guard. And the fact that he had noticed.

Your gaze dropped to his hands — ink-stained fingers curled around the edge of his desk.

“I like your room,” you said. Quietly.

He blinked, surprised. “Most people say it smells like weed and paint thinner.”

You smiled. “It does. But it’s still cool.”

A moment passed. And then another.

You didn’t want to leave.

He didn’t ask you to.

But then you heard the crunch of tires in the driveway, the unmistakable squeak of Julie’s voice through the open front door.

You stepped back fast, heartbeat loud in your ears.

Eddie stood up, like his body moved before his brain could catch up.

He looked at you. You looked away.

The bathroom door opened behind you, and you ducked around it quick, already pretending you were on your way down the stairs.

Julie’s voice was louder now — something about how their mom nearly hit someone with a shopping cart, and how Nick finally said he’d call her after work.

“There you are,” Julie said, spotting you in the hallway. “What’ve you been doing?”

You paused. “Was gonna get a drink.”

You followed her to her room, your pulse still high.

You didn’t look back.

But you could feel it — Eddie’s gaze at your back. Like the brush of static.

And that night, long after lights were out and Julie was talking half-asleep about the outfit she wanted to wear when she saw Nick again, you brushed your teeth and stared at yourself in the mirror.

Not Julie’s friend.

Just a girl with her heart lodged in her throat.

And a crush that was getting way too hard to hide.

a little summer romance fic for u<3 inspired by my current vacay in spain💌 song aesthetic: bad omens by 5 seconds of summer

[n0rmal-cat]

Kpop demon hunters x reader- selling your soul for job experience Part 2

[i wrote more but a friend said to cut it off here and save the rest for part 3 which ill post tomorrow]

part 1

They made a deal for their soul, they made a deal for their soul-

How did this mess even happen? And why on earth did they sell their souls in exchange for babysitting five idiots?! 

Apparently, they were meant to be the manager, but considering they could barely manage their own life, the thought of doing it for this bunch seems unlikely.

“So what exactly do you need me to do?” reader stood in front of the biggest couch they had ever seen, it was definitely bigger than their old apartment that's for sure. "You guys need like some water or snacks?"

"Water," the mint one raised his hand. He held a water bottle in his hand, but reader just guessed he was a really thirsty guy.

“Listen, whatever your name is,” the one with black hair said, casually nudging them with a hand on their back. “You don’t have to do anything-why don't you sit back and enjoy the ride?” a playful smile on his face.

“But I thought I was supposed to-“

“Don’t worry about Jinu,” the pink-haired one waved dismissively. “He’s just a little flustered after Gwi-ma asked you to be our manager. Why don’t you come sit by us? We’ll keep you company,” he beckoned, patting the seat beside him with a warm smile.

“Weren't you the one who said you wanted to eat my soul while I slept?” They pointed a finger at him, confused knitting their brow.

He chuckled, a hint of mischief in his eyes. “Guilty~”

Jinu let out a sigh. He grabbed reader 's chin with his claws, "Please, dear, won't you let me take the reins? I’ll buy you some food, huh, that’s what everyone wants, hm, a cute boy buying you food.”

Reader looks into his face strangely, “ya what?” 

He tried to smirk again, seemingly trying to look flirtatious but failing miserably.

“Ahg, never mind, we need to figure out our stage names,” Jinu said, pulling his Playboy mask off. “Ah, Mystery, Abs, Romance, and Baby!” he said to each of them respectively.

Mystery shrugged in nonchalance, Abs wore a puzzled expression, Romance beamed with enthusiasm, and Baby simply sipped on water, unimpressed by the unfolding drama.

“Stage name? Wait, what exactly are you guys doing? What am I the manager of” reader asked.

‘Ab’s’ leaped to his feet. “Oh! We’re a ‘demon idol group’ Jinu’s plan is brilliant! Just listen, we’ll become the biggest group out there, steal all the hunters fans, and then throw an epic feast!”

And of course now they knew that 'feast' meant eating half the population's souls, I mean, hey, at least that didn't include them since they didn't really have a soul anymore...

“The hunters? There are demon hunters, are they like YouTuber ghost hunters?”  This whole thing was just confusing reader even more than it already was.

“Please stop,” he rubbed his forehead. “Look, are we all ok with our names?” he looked around the room, annoyed.

Mystery shrugged, “It's fine…”

“Well, I, for one, absolutely love my name! It perfectly encapsulates everything I am,” Romance beamed, a playful smile lighting up his features. “Yeah, thanks for naming me ‘Baby.’ That’s so creative! Do you want a reward?” he teased, batting his eyes dramatically, which soon turned into a scowl.

“And what about you?” Jinu directed his gaze toward Abs.

“Ah, no, I’m not a fan of my name! Abs isn’t even a good name! Can’t I choose something cool? Like ‘Guns!’” He flexed his arms proudly, showcasing his muscles. Romance clapped his hands in enthusiastic support. “I think ‘abs’ is a cute name! Oh, you could even go by ‘Abby’”

With a wide grin, he wrapped an arm around the reader, radiating happiness. “Haha, yes! Maybe Gwi-ma was right about you!”

Jinu furrowed his eyebrows. "Okay, let’s move on... Our first single, ‘Soda Pop,’ is written! All we need to do now is work on the choreography, and we’ll be set for our debut," he held out papers with the lyrics on them.

Reader quickly skimmed through them. "So, did you mean to write it in a way where it sounds like you want to eat their souls or?"

"Oh no, I very much did, I find it quite funny humans don't know anything." he let out a small laugh.

"Ah..Wait, you don’t want a name?” the reader asked, genuinely curious.

“My name is Jinu,” he replied, confused.

 “No, I mean your stage name! Maybe something like Raven? Because of your hair!” the reader suggested, half-jokingly.

"Oh yeah, I knew that, phh." he clutched the papers in his hands, a darker purple on his face, before walking away slowly. “I’m gonna go…back to my room now, haha bye…bye..”

The room descended into an awkward silence, broken only by Baby's frustrated outburst. “Oh, so he gets to keep his name, but I’m just called Baby?” he spat, irritation evident in his tone.

“Relax, you know Jinu just wants to hold on to everything that makes him human while he still can,” Romance tried to calm Baby.

“Oh, don’t give me that nonsense! What? Do we not want to keep our humanity, too? It feels like we don’t get anything from this shitshow, I want my curse gone to ya know!” Baby shot back, his voice escalating.

“Please, your curse is nothing compared to the rest of ours!” Abby glared, her expression fierce. In a fit of anger, Baby clutched his water bottle so tightly that the top popped open, splashing mystery.

Just like that, a full-blown argument erupted among the four of them, the ground seemed to shake by the sheer volume of them. 

Reader put their arms up to block their face. These guys were gonna have fans? They could barely communicate without starting a fight.

“Hey!” Six angry yellow eyes suddenly glared back at them, fierce and unyielding. “I—” they almost struggled to keep their composure. Were they really going to do this? I mean, they had already agreed to a death wish, so what was the harm?

“Do you guys really think you can maintain a fanbase with those attitudes? You can barely string together two words before one of you starts yelling!” the reader exclaimed.

"And also, how are you even going to be idols, news flash, you guys are purple!" They let out a sigh as they finished.

Baby was the first one to smile. “Well, would you look at that, the manager knows how to manage,” he chuckled letting go of Abby’s hair.

Romance crossed his arms, a frown on his face. "But they’re right. If we go out looking like this, people will definitely stare, but it won’t win us any fans,” he said

“Can’t you guys just disguise yourselves as humans? I mean, we’re in this whole building, right?” Reader gestured dramatically to the apartment.

“That was Gwi-ma’s idea, not ours,” Addy replied, shaking his head. “We can disguise ourselves, sure, but it takes a lot of energy.”

“Especially when dancing,” mystery replied.

Reader glanced between them, a smirk forming as a lightbulb moment clicked. “Well, I mean, you guys are strong demons, aren’t you? Jinu picked you for a reason,” they said, wrapping an arm affectionately around Addy and Romance.

“You’re just as bad at flirting as Jinu,” Abby nodded at Romance's words.

“I’m trying to encourage you…” Reader shot back, forcing the words through clenched teeth.

A moments later and the same pink smoke appeared again this time relieving them in human form.

It was a little rusty, and you would see their patterns or eyes change for a split second, but overall it was good.

“Not bad, actually really good”

The only issue was… “We’re gonna need to do something about those clothes, though. Don’t get me wrong, the matching black outfits are great, but they’re just not… hmm, boy band-y?” Reader put a hand under their chin in thought

“So what do you suggest, oh great manager?” Baby asked rolling his eyes.

“Me? You’re letting me decide on your outfits?” Reader blinked with a mix of surprise and excitement.

“Well, we would have asked Jinu, but he’s not. Here right now.”

“He’s also like four hundred years old,” Romance added with a playful roll of his eyes.

“I would love to help, but I feel like I’d have to hear you guys perform the song first,” Reader said, genuinely excited. Who knew selling your soul could lead to a makeover montage? 

“You heard them let’s go find Jinu!” Abby punched the air. Like a pack of marching ants, they fell in line as they went to find Jinu.

“Jinu, we're pumped up and ready to dance~” Abby half sang.

They stopped at a door marked with a nameplate that read ‘Jinu’. Abby reached for the handle, only to find it locked. “Locked…” The group exchanged a few glances.

“Ha!” Abby kicked the door down.

“What is wrong with you?! You didn’t even knock!” Jinu yelled from his bed at a giant blue thing by his side. “And why do you all look like that?”

“Reader suggested we use these disguises because we’d blend in better, but now we need clothes, and they can't give us any without seeing us perform,” Addy explained, glancing back at Reader.

“We haven’t even practiced our choreography yet? And I was going to dress us, clothes aren’t that hard to understand guys”

“Wrong!” Reader screamed, stepping forward. “Fashion is incredibly complex! There are so many factors to consider when choosing what to wear.” 

With determination shining in their eyes, Reader pushed to the front. “So perform for me so I can help you pick the best outfits possible!” Were they being too much? "Please..."

"Yeah, come on, Jinu, let's go, you're the one with all the musical talent." Romance nudged baby, who rolled his eyes. "Jinu, we're already in these forms, just perform the song with us already."

He got up from his bed, making the blue thing turn alongside him, “Come along, Derpy.”

Romance put a hand to their ear “that’s her you encourage someone” he said whispering.

But reader was focused on something much more important.

A very big cat is the only thing reader could think of as they watch it walk past them. “I need that.”

“What?” one of the boys replied, looking puzzled. “What?”

Finally, Jinu stood before them in his human form, just like the others, they were ready to perform their practice performance.

“Just count down from three, then hit the button,” Jinu instructed.

“Got it, and one, two, three go!” Reader pressed the play button 

Settling down next to Derpy, they found themselves bobbing their head to the hypnotic beat that filled the room. The music was undeniably fun, and the boys' voices were surprisingly harmonious. Well, considering they were demons, it made sense performing was kind of their specialty.

“Wha!” reader had to duck down so they wouldn't get hit by the flying pink heart. Derpy tilted his head slowly.

As the music came to an end, the boys posed in perfect synchronization. “There, do you have everything you need now?” Jinu stepped toward the reader, his brow glistening with sweat, clearly trying to maintain composure despite them all looking like shit.

“Actually, yes! Oh, and you guys can change back now!” The moment the words left their lips, all of them let out a relieved sigh as they morphed back into their original forms.

“Now, how am I going to get these clothes? It’s not like I have any money,” the reader thought aloud. “Does Giw-ma have a credit card or something?”

Juni wiped the sweat from his forehead and handed them a card, his expression earnest. “I won’t disappoint you!” reader exclaimed, rushing out of the room with determination.

“Gahhh, I need some water,” Baby groaned, doubling over and placing his hands on his knees, clearly feeling the effects of their hard work.

[sparklystarrrr]

Hello! Can u please write smth about floyd x female!jellyfish reader who matches his energy? Thank u!!

THEE Chaotic Duo

Synopsis: Don’t put your hands in the sea creature tank! The jellyfish and the eel bite.

Contains: Floyd L. x Jellyfish! Fem! Reader, octavinelle reader, so so chaotic, Riddle is their target as usual, Azul being a party pooper, I’m so sorry for whatever this is…

(y/n) and Floyd were... scary to say the least...

She was a jellyfish and he was an eel. When she was alone, people would assume (y/n) to be a calm minded and elegant young woman. It couldn't have been farther from the truth because when she was with her boyfriend, Floyd... and oh boy.

With her harsh zaps, his terrifying height, and their maniacal laughs that echo off the hallways after chasing some poor little NRC student around, no one was safe.

Everyone knew the scary Octavinelle couple. Not by choice, but because how else were they suppose to protect themselves?

It was like there was a dark and ominous aura around the two of them whenever they lurked around the corner and scoped out which fishies to squeeze and sting!

Today's target? Riddle frickin' Rosehearts.

The eerie couple had been cackling about some random kid in their previous class who'd been jumpscared by them from just turning around in his seat when they saw a red tuft of hair in the distance. It was no usual red, but a rose red. Target acquired.

"Floyd, you seein' what I'm seein'?" (y/n) whispered in his ear.

"Huh? Oh yeah, I'm seein' goldfishie~ hehehe!"

"I bet he's needin' a sting, don'tcha think Floydie?"

"I think yer right Jellyfishie!"

And with their new plan and target, they were on the hunt.

At sensing the two, the crowded hallways literally split around them to get out of a potential sting or squeeze...

Students physically shuddered at their sharp teeth while they both smiled playfully.

The only person who somehow didn't sense the two coming was of course.... Riddle.

He walked with urgency in his steps as he made his way to his next class. Books in hand and all.

With his back turned, Floyd and (y/n) snuck up like two preditors.

Once they got close enough, (y/n) stuck her index finger out in poor Riddle's direction. She quickly zapped him which effortlessly distracted the small boy. Whilst Riddle was turned to her, Floyd picked him up into a bone crushing and suffocating squeeze."Ack- PUT ME DOWN THIS INSTANT!!! IT WILL BE OFF WITH BOTH OF YOUR HEADS IF THIS IS NOT DONE IN THE NEXT SECOND!!!"

The boy's face turned bright red in anger and the heart shaped strands of hair in his face practically stood up straight in rage.

(y/n) took this as a chance to be playful, bringing her hand up to the strands and twirling them in her fingers and sending little jolts to his body with her other hand. It was almost like a taunt, but in truth, the couple was just having fun with a fishie!

"Hey Riddlie, does your hair usually stand up like this when yer pink?"

"(y/n), CEASE YOUR PLAYING WITH MY HAIR!!"

"But goldfishie~ we're havin' fun!" Floyd giggled with the toothiest smile ever.

Their fun (Riddle's torture) would've went on longer had Azul not caught them on his way to class as well.

He sputtered at the sight of his dorm members/ insufferable friends publicly humiliating a fellow Housewarden.

"Floyd, (y/n). What... IS GOING ON HERE??!!"

"Playin'! Wanna join?" Floyd taunted. A lovely idea then slithered into (y/n)'s brain. Quickly, she whispered it right into Floyd's ear. There was a glint in the couple's eyes that Azul and Riddle did not like.

Floyd dropped Riddle (who made a mad dash to his class right after), turned to Azul and just eyed him down eerily. This didn't last long before the scary couple started a mad chase at Azul.

New target found: AZUL ASHENGROTTO

"W-WHAT ARE YOU TWO DOING??!! AGHHHH----"

"We're it Zuzu!! You can run but you can't hide!" Nobody understands how (y/n) sounded so sweet screaming that at Azul while sprinting at him like she was starving for some octopus.

Floyd just cackled as usual and threw himself at Azul, knocking him down and screaming "YOU'RE IT NOW COME CATCH US HAHAHA!" and ran off after picking up (y/n) and throwing the jellyfish girl over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes.

My, what a normal day for (y/n) and Floyd!

[vbecker10]

Let Me Go

Pairing: Loki x female reader (Y/N)

Summary: Prince Loki has been declared king regent after the Allfather falls into the Odinsleep without any warning while Prince Thor remains banished on Midgard. The God of Mischief summons you to his chambers in order to dissolve your engagement despite your reassurance that you will stand by his side through whatever devastating lie his father revealed to him.

Warnings: No happy ending! Angst, Loki telling you he's a monster, reader feeling hurt, confused, devastated, Loki hurting reader (just a tiny bit)

A/N: Oh look... another fic that I wasn't supposed to be working on but couldn't get out of my brain! Why do I bother with a drafts list if I can't follow the stupid thing? Anyways... I hope you are all here to be emotionally devastated cause that is the goal. As I said in the warnings, this isn't going to have a happy ending but if I get enough comments about it, I might make an alternate happy ending version.

This of based off an idea I got from the Three Doors Down song, Let Me Go linked at the bottom. I liked the lyrics a lot and used them for some of the conversation between Y/N and Loki.

Good luck & don't hate me, I warned you! 💚

The door to the library opens and closes but you keep your eyes down, your attention solely on your book and not the heavy footsteps coming steadily towards you. You flip to the next page quickly, biting your lip as you tuck your legs under you on the small couch and hold the book closer.

"Lady Y/N," a familiar voice breaks through your focus and causes you to jump in surprise.

"Fandral, I apologize. I was so engrossed in my reading, I didn't hear you come in," you greet one of the warriors three as you stand, smoothing out the skirt of your floor length gown. Prince Thor's oldest friend he doesn't smile in return and you can't stop the anxiousness that fills you. "Is there news of Prince Thor from Midgard?" you ask hopefully, the older prince has been gone for nearly a month. Much longer than anyone had expected and any word of his return would have been welcome.

He shakes his head, his somber expression confirming your fear that something is terribly wrong on Asgard.

The sound of the doors opening again distracts you momentarily from the blonde warrior in front of you. You swallow hard when two Einherjar, the palace guards tasked with protecting the royal family, enter the large room and you look back to Fandral.

"Fandral..." you repeat his name quietly as your mind fills with dozens of dreadful scenarios including Prince Loki being injured somehow. He takes a deep breath as he prepares himself for the message he is about to deliver and you wait in silence. The book slips from your fingers, hitting the ground with a thud when you learn King Odin has unexpectedly fallen into the Odinsleep.

"The king regent has summoned you to his chambers," Fandral tells you after explaining that Asgard will now be ruled by the younger prince and you nod slowly. "The Einherjar will escort you."

Walking down the empty halls, you keep your head lowered and your hands clasped in front of you as you follow the two guards closely. The sounds of your footsteps and those belonging to the Einherjar echo through the marble hallway, adding to the tension you feel in your chest. The palace has never been so still. The high court and royal advisors wait in the great hall for an update from the queen on the king's health while the palace staff has been ordered to remain out of sight unless summoned.

I can't imagine how hard this must be for Loki, to have witnessed his father succumb to the Odinsleep alone must have been so shocking. My prince has such a heavy burden to carry, I hope I can take some of the weight off his shoulders, you think as you and your escorts continue towards your destination.

Thor should be here. Loki never wanted this, he never wanted to rule the kingdom. He only ever wanted to be seen by his father and brother, you sigh when you think back to your late night walk in the garden where Loki admitted that very thought to you. He had never voiced it to anyone before, he knew his brother would never understand and his father would see it as a sign of weakness. As hard as it was to hear how he truly felt, you cherished the knowledge that you gained his trust and swore never to betray it.

Your thoughts shift to your engagement with the prince as you follow the guards up the grand staircase. Your relationship with Loki has not been what you expected and you couldn't be more grateful to all the gods for their blessing. The marriage had only been arranged to advance your father's status at court but in the six months since it was announced, you and your betrothed grew closer and closer. A friendship blossomed easily as you had many similar interests but in recent weeks you realized you have fallen completely in love with your future husband. The thought of spending the rest of your life with Loki no longer fills you with dread and apprehension as it did prior to your meeting. You are beyond excited by the idea of being his wife, counting down the days to your wedding although you are still too nervous to reveal your true feelings to him. Maybe on our wedding night I'll finally have the courage to tell him I love him dearly, you hope.

You look up just as the door to Loki's chambers comes into view at the end of the hall. If you and Loki hadn't broken royal protocol almost every night for the last two months, this would have been your first time here but the guards don't need to know that you knew your way.

You couldn't help breaking protocol though, you slept better in his arms then you ever did in your own bed no matter how soft it was or how many pillows you had. Each time you slipped out of your room to sleep in his bed, he would kiss you gently as his arms held you close to his body. When your eyes would drift closed, he would whisper how many days left until your wedding as if he was as excited as you were for the day to arrive. You blush a little as the memory of last night fills your mind. 'Only seventeen more sunrises until you are mine for eternity,' he whispered, his lips barely touching your ear just before he placed several light kisses to your skin.

A loud series of knocks on the tall wooden door pulls you from your pleasant memory and back into your present state of worry and anxiousness. One of the guards stands next to the door that leads into Loki's chambers while the other announces your presence as it opens.

As soon as the door closes you run to Loki without uttering a single greeting, immediately forgetting all the formalities of court that have been drilled into you your entire life. You hug him tightly but his arms remain at his sides and you fear you've made a grave mistake. Just as you are about to let go, he lets out a heavy sigh and embraces you tightly. After a long moment Loki pulls back slightly, not enough to free himself from your arms but enough to look into your eyes. He lifts his hand to gently stroke your cheek and you force a smile despite your growing nerves. He looks down at you in silence as you search his face for any clue as to what he is thinking. He seems emotionless but his eyes reveal the pain and confusion he is trying to hide from you.

You know better than anyone on Asgard how delicate the relationship between Loki and his father is but you also know deep down Loki is desperate for the king's love and approval. Were they fighting before the king succumbed to the Odinsleep, the thought pushes into your mind suddenly and your heart aches. Is that why he is taking this drastic turn of events so terribly? Does he blame himself? How could he though, this isn't his fault. Rumors that the king has been putting off the Odinsleep have been heard throughout the palace for years. It was bound to happen this way, surely Loki must know that.

You're at a lose for words as you look up at your future husband. I'm sorry, I'm here for you, everything will be okay. These words don't feel as if they will be enough to take away the emotions he seems to be wrestling with as he looks at you silently. Instead of speaking, you press your lips to his and feel the smallest hint of relief as he kisses you back.

Suddenly Loki breaks the kiss and pulls away from your embrace, taking several steps away from you. His eyes fall to the floor between you, your heart feels heavy when he lifts his eyes to look at you. You mumble a quiet apology for the kiss, fidgeting with your fingers but the prince shakes his head slowly in response.

He takes a step towards you and stops almost as if he can't bring himself to be any closer to you. "My beautiful Y/N," he says quietly, the joy missing from his voice. "If you only knew... one more kiss could be the best thing," as if he knows you already miss the feeling of his lips on yours, "but one more lie could be the worst."

"Loki..." you take a deep breath to steady yourself, moving tentatively towards him but you freeze when he takes a large step back, "You are making me nervous." Your mind races as you try to understand if he is accusing you of a lie or if he has been lying to you. "What do you mean, one more lie?"

He doesn't answer and you can't stop yourself as you begin to close the distance between you and your fiance. "Loki, you know I've never lied to you, I would never. I don't understand," you tell him, thankful that he allows you to come close enough to reach out and take his hand.

"No, I know you haven't," he lifts his other hand to cup your cheek gently. A small smile flickers across his face before he lets his fingers fall from your skin but he still holds your hand. "My father-" he clears his throat and corrects himself which you find curious, "The king has lied to me my entire life but now that I know the truth I know what I must do."

You are almost too afraid to ask what he means but you push yourself the speak, "You know you can tell me anything. What did the king lie about? What do you think you need to do?"

"The truth would only destroy your image of me and I cannot bear the thought of you seeing me for what I really am," his words frighten you. "Y/N, in this world there's real and make believe and I have learned that none of this was real."

"This seems real to me," you insist, squeezing his hand and placing a soft kiss to his cheek, his skin feels unusually cool to your lips.

"It is not," he counters with no explanation then he pulls his hand free from yours. "You're not something I deserve."

"Don't say that," you tell him as you feel your heart starting to break open. A new fear you had never imagined surfaces. Loki is ending our engagement, he's ending us. Without even a second thought you let out the only secret you've ever kept from Loki, "I love you."

The words hang in the air between you and you worry at your bottom lip, desperate for him to say he loves you in return. Instead, he shakes his head as if he doesn't believe you, "You say you love me but you don't know who I am. Let me go before you learn the truth and fear me as you should."

"I could never be afraid of you," you feel a tear roll down your cheek and do nothing to stop it as you look into Loki's eyes. "I love you and I know you, Loki. I know you better than anyone on Asgard. You're my prince, my best friend, my future. Just give me a chance, talk to me please."

"What secret?" you follow him as he walks across his room and places his hands on his desk, his back to you. "Loki, please you've always been able to talk to me," you urge, your hand resting on his shoulder lightly to let him know you are here. Your breath catches in your throat when he turns to look at you and you back away, your body filling with terror as he predicted when his crimson eyes focus on you. There's only one race in the nine realms that has eyes which glow such a deep red and they are monsters.

His expression softens, as if seeing your pain and hearing your words has changed his heart but he looks away quickly. "You cannot know me Y/N because even I didn't know who I was until the king let his secret slip just before the Odinsleep took him."

"I don't understand-" you shake your head, trying to make sense of what is happening but your fear makes it hard to think rationally.

"Do you see it now?" he asks, his voice harsher than you've ever heard before when he sees how scared you are of him.

"Odin is not my father," Loki finally begins to explain the long held secret of the royal family. "He stole me from my home as an infant during the war on Jotunheim a thousand years ago."

"You're... you're a Jotun?" you ask, your voice shaking as he walks slowly closer to you and you can't help but take a step backwards. You've heard stories about the frost giants from Jotunheim, every child on Asgard had. They were a violent race who were to be feared. The king waged war on the ice planet to save the realm from their horrid plan to destroy the bifrost and turn Asgard into a frozen wasteland. How could the man I love with all my heart be a monster from the frost realm?

"I am," he nods then asks you a question in return. "Do you fear me?"

"I-" you open your mouth to answer him but your voice fails you when Loki's pale skin becomes a deep shade of blue. Intricately detailed ridges form along the exposed skin on his wrists and neck, traveling up his face. He stands in front of you in his Jotun form and you find it hard to breath.

"Do you still love me as you claimed to only moments ago?" he asks when you don't answer his first question.

Yes! your heart screams but your mouth remains tightly shut as your mind replays the dozens and dozens of horrific tales you've heard about frost giants as a child.

Loki senses your indecision and makes the choice for you, "You said you love me but you didn't truly know me. Now that you know the truth, you're terrified of me as you should be. I know what I am, I'm the monster mother's tell their children about to ensure they behave. I am not something you cannot love, now get out!"

"Loki, wait..." you shrink back when he yells, your feelings for him trying to win the fight over your deeply rooted fear. "Please, I just need a minute-"

"Let me go," he repeats what he told you earlier and you shake your head as tears roll down your cheeks. "You do not want me as I am now, you do not love me."

He reaches out and grabs your wrist, his fingers are icy cold on your skin as you struggle to pull yourself free. "Loki-" you plead as you twist your arm, failing to break his hold as he pulls you towards the doors. "You're hurting me!"

"That's what monsters do," he says in a cruel tone without looking at you as he pulls one of the doors open and forcefully pushes you into the hall. The two guards have left and you can't help but wish they were here not that you can be sure of who's side they would be on. Loki might be a Jotun, but he's still king regent of Asgard. You gasp in pain when you fall to the ground, his icy fingerprints remain on your skin as if you've been burned by the cold and your cradle your wrist as you look up at him.

"I loved you," you say softly between sobs.

"Loved," Loki repeats the word and you realize you used past tense without even thinking. Before you can open your mouth to correct yourself he says, "You are free from our arrangement. I'm letting you go." Just before he slams the doors shut, you see a flicker of pain in his glowing red eyes.

I hope you liked this!! Please like, share and comment if you did 💚💚 Please let me know if you want to be added to my taglist!

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[11yellowdaffodils]

Unfortunately I am going to need Eddie teaching Buck how to ballroom dance for some event this next season.

Maybe Buck’s parents are having their 50th anniversary and want Buck and Maddie to show up (shoutout that one fanfiction), maybe the department is throwing a big charity ball, probably some other thing because I am not at all familiar with ballroom dancing and what events you would do it at.

Whatever it is though, Buck needs to learn. He signs up for a class without anyone knowing, and he doesn’t tell anyone about it because he knows they’ll just get on his case about “Eddie did ballroom dancing why can’t he teach you” and whatnot, but the thought of Eddie teaching him how to do something that requires so much touch and is so intimate is just too overwhelming for Buck (Buck does not know why).

Eddie eventually corners him and is like “are you seeing someone? Who is it” and bucks like “no haha I’m, uh. doing something” and Eddie has to draw it out of him because Buck is Not Telling and Eddie doesn’t know why. Until Buck is just like “fine, I signed up for ballroom dancing classes because of [aforementioned reason]” Eddie gets all offended (like Buck knew he would) and is all “why didn’t you ask me, I used to do competitions, I was amazing, I could definitely have taught you better than any class could because I bet you the teacher didn’t win their state competition when they were 15”

So what is Buck supposed to do? Not let Eddie teach him now?? Obviously not, he’ll just deal with all of the touches and intimacy and Eddie of it all. He can do it, he’s an adult. He can act like one for gods sake

So their first lesson happens, and it’s at Eddie’s house with all of the furniture in the living room moved to the side. Buck has learned a little bit so far, but is incredibly awful at it. Eddie’s all “do you know how to box step? We’re gonna start simple” Buck goes “not really, we went over it in class but I can’t do it” so Eddie has Buck show him how Buck does his box steps on his own. Buck immediately messes up his counts and trips over his feet and Eddie is trying not to laugh but he’s not trying very hard to hide it. So Eddie teases him a little and goes over to him and is all “watch me” and Eddie does it perfectly (because obviously, the music is still in him and he hears the counts in his dreams) and goes “come here” so he’s holding onto Buck in classic ballroom dancing partner style. (Eddie’s the lead ofc)

Eddie kinda has to manhandle Buck so he’s in the right position too, and Buck kind of loses his mind a bit. The butterflies in his stomach are going wild, just like he feared they would, and then they start to move. Eddie is counting softy and going “stand-up-straight” in time to his 1-2-3’s (and is tbh getting ptsd from his ballroom dance teacher, but Buck has horrible posture) Buck is tripping over himself AND Eddie, but every time they stumble, Eddie just takes it slower and slower until they are literally going turtle mode. But Buck finally is getting the rhythm down. And he’s doing it!! And he’s so focused on looking down at his feet and Eddie’s counts that he doesn’t even notice the smile that’s crept into Eddie’s voice, or the way Eddie’s looking at him.

He finally looks up when they start picking up the pace because he’s so proud of himself, and it immediately proves to be the wrong decision. He puts his full weight on Eddie’s foot and simultaneously trips over himself, so now they’re both out of focus. But Eddie’s hand is gripping Bucks arm for balance, Buck is trying to balance on one foot because he pulled his other foot off of Eddie’s too quickly, and they’re going down.

Buck ends up falling on top of Eddie and pinning him down, and they’re both laughing this whole time. Eddie says something like “you really are hopeless aren’t you buckley” and buck tries to defend himself with a “I can’t help it if I was cool in highschool” and has a big stupid smile on his face and butterflies fluttering amuck in his stomach that have traveled up to his chest, and then Eddie’s expression shifts a little bit. Bucks smile turns into something else too, and suddenly he needs to kiss Eddie Right Now. He needs to kiss him like he needs air to breathe. And Eddie’s right there, under him, looking at him like that, so what’s he expected to do really? Not kiss him? You’re kidding

So he leans over to Eddie’s face and looks into his eyes, looking for some type of assurance that he can kiss Eddie, that Eddie needs it at least a little bit too, and Eddie looks at him, and he has that little smile and his eyes are so black and he lets out a small breath and gives a little nod, so Buck just goes for it

Carla comes in with Chris 30 minutes later to find them still on the floor, the furniture shoved into the hallway and the kitchen, making out dirty. Chris is not in the house yet, so she can walk right back out and herd Chris right back into her car

[fairydustttx]

R U Mine?

Bob Reynolds x reader

“I go crazy 'cause here isn't where I wanna be and satisfaction feels like a distant memory.”

Warnings: Mention of drugs and overdose.

Word count: 1671

Summary: You’re a therapist facing your lost ex, Bob—now a broken patient. You must stay professional while wrestling with past love and pain.

The room was sterile in that militant way—bare walls, gray light, a table bolted down like it might float away if left unanchored. Two chairs. No softness. No warmth.

Except you.

You stepped inside with a calm you didn’t quite feel, dressed in neat black slacks, sturdy boots, and a soft gray turtleneck that felt like armor. Your breath caught briefly as the faint scent of cinnamon clung to you—your little defiant comfort in a place that stripped everything else away.

He was already there, slumped in the chair. Bob Reynolds.

Your heart hit a jarring note deep inside—Bob, your ex, the man who disappeared without a trace, vanished from your life like a ghost.

But your face remained neutral, unreadable.

He didn’t look up at first. He didn’t speak.

Then his brows drew together, nostrils flaring as if he caught something familiar in the air.

“Do I… know you?” he rasped. “You smell like…”

You slid into the chair across from him, careful not to let your pulse betray you.

“I’m your therapist,” you said, your voice steady. “My name’s — I’m here to help.”

His eyes locked on you, confusion flickering with something deeper—something like recognition.

Bob murmured under his breathe testing a name that felt half-remembered.

You nodded, professional, calm. “I know this is disorienting. You’ve been through a lot. Memory fragmentation, personality recalibration. But this space is safe. You can say whatever you need.”

He studied you, eyes searching for something beyond the surface. Then: “I don’t remember you. But there’s something...”

“That’s the Proust effect,” you said softly. “Scent memory. It’s powerful.”

He smirked faintly. “Like the cookie thing.”

You allowed a faint, professional smile. “Yes. Except the cookie is my cinnamon.”

His gaze softened for a moment, the storm behind it settling. “I remember that… I remember lying in bed, and that smell… it stopped me from falling.”

You swallowed the sudden ache. “You had night terrors. I used to hold you until they stopped.”

Back then the room was quiet except for the soft hum of the heater. You sat close beside him on the worn couch, your knee brushing against his. Your fingers traced the bruises on his knuckles—gentle, careful—before sliding up to intertwine with his trembling hand.

He flinched but didn’t pull away. Instead, his hand curled around yours, warm and fragile, like a lifeline.

“You don’t have to carry it alone,” you whispered, voice low and steady.

His eyes found yours, dark and stormy, filled with a mix of fear and something desperate, needing. Slowly, he leaned in, and you felt the heat of his breath on your skin as his forehead pressed against yours.

Your heart beat faster, chest rising and falling in sync. You slid your other hand to cup the back of his neck, fingers threading through the soft strands of his hair. The world outside disappeared as your bodies drew closer, a quiet promise in the way your torsos touched.

“I’m scared,” he murmured against your lips.

You pulled him gently into a slow, tender kiss, your hands resting firmly on his shoulders, grounding him. His breath hitched, and he melted against you, letting himself be held, finally safe in your arms.

You stayed like that, wrapped around each other, the weight of everything else falling away until all that remained was this fragile moment of closeness—warmth against cold, two broken pieces trying to mend.

Bob’s eyes flicked to yours now—startled, vulnerable.

“Did I hurt you?” he asked quietly.

“No,” you said softly. “You were lost, not dangerous.”

Silence fell, heavy but not cold.

“You’re not supposed to say that,” he murmured. “This is therapy.”

“It is,” you replied evenly. “But you’re more than a patient. You’re a person I’m here to help.”

His eyes searched you. Then, fragile as glass, he asked, “Did I love you?”

Your throat tightened, but you kept your voice steady.

“You don’t remember,” you said. “But love isn’t the same as healing, Bob.”

His face tightened. “They don’t call me Bob anymore.”

“What do they call you?” you asked.

“Subject zero. Patient alpha. The volunteer.”

“Do you know why you volunteered?”

He shook his head.

You leaned forward slightly, careful to keep your tone clinical. “Because you wanted to be better. To be enough.”

He swallowed, the weight of that confession hanging in the air.

“I don’t feel like a person,” he said quietly. “I feel like a prototype.”

Your fingers twitched on the clipboard.

“Okay then let’s start there,” you said softly. “With the person.”

His eyes flickered with a spark of something—hope, maybe—before fading again.

The room felt smaller suddenly, the sterile light harsher.

You reached out before you could stop yourself. His hand trembled beneath yours.

“Don’t—” he warned sharply, voice tight with fear.

But your fingers brushed his anyway.

And the world fractured.

Suddenly, you were twenty-one again.

Rain pounded relentlessly against the roof of a taxi, cold and unyielding. The stale scent of coffee clung stubbornly to your soaked clothes, mixing with the sharp sting of anxiety twisting in your gut. Your phone screen, cracked and blinking with unread messages, felt like a barrier you couldn’t break through—messages from friends, from him, from a life that felt like it was slipping away.

You were running. Barefoot, desperate, heart hammering as the stairs blurred beneath your feet—each step louder than the last in your mind.

Then—the crash.

The scream.

A guttural sob that tore through the silence like a knife.

You found him there on the kitchen floor, the scene etched in your mind with brutal clarity: empty vials scattered across the linoleum like shattered hopes, shards of broken glass glittering dangerously by the sink. His hand was bleeding where he’d punched through the cabinet, red mixing with the splintered wood. His face twisted in rage and despair, screaming at something invisible—the demons clawing at his soul.

For a moment, time froze. You didn’t scream. You didn’t run. You just stood there, soaked to the bone, trembling as your heart pounded so loud you couldn’t hear the storm outside anymore.

Because in that moment—beneath the rage, beneath the brokenness—you knew the hardest truth.

You couldn’t save him.

No matter how much you loved him.

No matter how desperately you wanted to.

The pain in his eyes was a mirror of your own helplessness, and it was the kind of memory that clings to your bones, refusing to let go.

You came back to the present gasping, the sterile room closing around you once again.

Bob’s gaze was sharp, haunted, as if he had seen that fractured moment too. His hands trembled in his lap, as distant and fragile as the man you once knew.

“I’m sorry,” he said, hollow.

You stumbled back, breath ragged. “You saw it.”

He nodded. “It’s not just memory. It’s trauma. Regret. Fear. When I get too close, I pull it out of people.”

You met his gaze, trembling—not only from the weight of his words but from the storm of memories rushing back like a tidal wave you weren’t prepared for. The sterile gray walls of the room, the harsh fluorescent light, the cold steel of the table—they all faded into the background as the space between who he was now and who he once had been collapsed, brutally and uninvited. He was no longer just a patient sitting across from you. He was him—the man whose name still echoed in the chambers of your heart, the person you loved and lost, the storm you had spent years trying to outrun.

For a moment, the professional armor you’d worn for so long cracked, thin and fragile as glass. Your breath hitched. Your hands, steady just seconds before, trembled with the weight of memories you had tried so hard to bury—memories of late nights holding him through terror and pain, of whispered promises you knew you couldn’t keep, of a love that was both your salvation and your undoing. But you couldn’t let it show. Not here. Not now.

You reminded yourself sharply why you were here: to help him. To guide him back from the edges of his broken mind, not to drown in your own past. You pressed your fingers harder against the clipboard in your lap, grounding yourself, willing your face to remain impassive, your voice calm and even. This was your job. Your duty. And yet, the irony stung—helping the man who once held your heart, who once shattered it, while pretending you didn’t know him at all.

You swallowed the sudden tightness in your throat, the lump that threatened to silence you. Because the truth was—no matter how many times you told yourself otherwise—you were still tethered to him. Still haunted by the shadow of what you had shared, and what you had lost. He wasn’t just a patient with fractured memories; he was the embodiment of everything you’d tried to forget, the living proof of your failure to save him from himself.

And now, sitting here, feeling his pain like a physical weight pressing down on your chest, you understood how deeply intertwined your survival was with his. Not just in the clinical sense, but in the raw, brutal reality of trying to move forward while carrying pieces of a past you couldn’t let go.

This wasn’t just about helping him piece himself back together.

It was about surviving the parts of yourself you’d hidden away—those fragile shards of hope, heartbreak, guilt, and love—that still ached beneath the surface, threatening to break free.

It was about learning to breathe again, even when the ghost of him lingered in every quiet corner of your mind.

Because sometimes, the hardest healing wasn’t for the patient in the chair.

It was for the person sitting across from them, fighting to hold the pieces of their own shattered heart together—one professional breath at a time.